It was the one guaranteed great match.https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/breaking-becky-lynch-possibly-survivor-series-due-injuries/

Apparently Lynch has a concussion and a broken nose and might not be cleared for the show.  Just PLEASE tell me this isn’t happening because that match has been built up way too well for it to not happen.  Second: if you put Nia in there instead, can we have Tamina get locked in a closet or something?  It’s the least you can do.

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 12, 2018
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young

It’s the Stephanie Show this week. That’s the entirety of the official Raw preview: a photo of Stephanie with a promise of her addressing the World Cup controversy. I’m sure this will include discussions of how disappointed she is with everyone and how Raw must be the most ridiculous adjective filled show that only Stephanie can be proud of because only WWE seems to care about this battle for brand supremacy which was only first mentioned a few weeks back and won’t be mentioned again a week after Survivor Series. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Veterans Day video. Nothing wrong with that.

Tag Team Battle Royal

Lucha House Party, Bobby Roode/Chad Gable, Ascension, B-Team, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Revival

Strowman has a seat in the ring and says he’s tired of waiting for the Acting General Manager Baron Corbin (Stephanie has been rubbing off on him)….and here’s Stephanie to interrupt. She talks about Shane McMahon disrespecting the locker room by declaring himself the best in the world. Braun gets up and yells that he doesn’t care about Shane or representing Raw.

Stephanie screeches about how he better care, just like the rest of the roster. That’s not happening because he’s tired of being treated like a meat castle. Get Corbin out here right now. Stephanie has a proposition: represent Raw and win the men’s match and he can have whatever he wants. Like, trains! Strowman wants a Universal Title match with Brock Lesnar, but first he wants Corbin.

Stephanie says done, but Braun wants to pick the stipulations. He also wants Corbin to sign a waver so he can’t get in trouble. That might take some more time but Stephanie seems cool with it. All she asks is to have Strowman not lay a hand on Corbin to prove he’s a proud member of the Raw roster.

Cue Ronda Rousey with Stephanie trying to introduce her but getting the microphone taken out of her hand. Ronda has been waiting for a challenge and Becky Lynch can do that. Now it’s Baron Corbin coming out for a pep talk but Ronda flips him over and leaves. Strowman is waiting on Corbin, but doesn’t touch him. He’ll be waiting after Survivor Series though.

This could have been worse as Stephanie was kept to a minimum, but it’s not doing much better about having the ridiculous focus on Raw vs. Smackdown. It’s not an interesting story and we’ve been here several years in a row now. Strowman wanting Corbin and then Lesnar again is fine, but just do those matches with regular elimination tags instead of this forced brand vs. brand stuff.

Ember Moon vs. Tamina Snuka

Nia Jax is in Tamina’s corner. Tamina throws her into the corner to start but Ember is right back with kicks to the leg. A sliding basement Downward Spiral sends Tamina outside. Ember follows but gets distracted by Jax, allowing Tamina to run her over. Back from a break with Ember fighting out of a chinlock and diving onto Jax….and bouncing off of her. The springboard crossbody gets two on Tamina but Jax offers another distraction. Tamina superkicks Ember down and hits the Superfly Splash for the pin at 8:35.

Rating: D. I kept writing Nia instead of Tamina because they’re basically the same person. They look similar, they wrestle the same powerful style and they’re even family. Now for some reason, WWE finds this more interesting than Ember, who they took the time to develop and build up in NXT. Why bring her up at all if you’re not going to use her for anything more than cannon fodder?

We look back at the Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins story, including the AOP taking the Tag Team Titles from Rollins last week and getting beaten down by Ambrose after the match.

Here’s Rollins for an in-ring interview with Corey Graves. Rollins wants to know what’s up with Ambrose, but Dean isn’t man enough to come out here and face him. Ambrose pops up on screen in front of a car with a burning barrel next to it. Dean says maybe he’s doing this because Rollins treated him like a joke for too long.

See, Dean was the same guy all along and maybe one day his brothers can forgive him. Nah that’s not true, because Dean used to think that the Shield was stronger together. The truth is the Shield made him weak so he pours gas over the Shield vest. Ambrose: “Burn it down.” He throws it into the barrel and Rollins is even angrier. It’s nice to have a reason from Dean and the symbolism was great, but if Dean doesn’t win the feud, none of this really matters.

We look back at Drew McIntyre soundly beating Kurt Angle last week with the ankle lock.

Here’s Angle…..’s music with Dolph Ziggler and Drew McIntyre actually coming out instead. Drew says they came here to take over and wants to know if the fans believe him now. First they broke the Shield and then he broke Angle. Last week Drew broke him down and then Angle started crying. Drew has never been so disgusted and he’s not allowing any more nostalgia acts on this show (make your own Ziggler jokes) but here’s Finn Balor to interrupt.

Balor says Drew crossed the line last week but Drew cuts him off to say dignity isn’t a right reserved for all. Last week, Drew kicked Finn’s head off because Balor is the problem with wrestling today. It’s all about emotion to him so go cry to the Balor Club. Balor says he’s been dealing with bullies for his whole life so let’s do it right now. Drew says deal, but it can be against Dolph instead. Balor seems happy but Drew headbutts him down before the bell.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Finn Balor

Balor is staggered but says ring the bell anyway. Ziggler knocks him down without much effort and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Balor gets in an enziguri from the apron but gets crotched going for the Coup de Grace. Cole declares this as Ziggler taking over as we take a break.

We come back with Balor kicking him in the head for a double knockdown. A quick double stomp gives Balor two but Dolph is right back with the Fameasser. Balor fights up again and sends Dolph outside for the big flip dive onto both of them, only to miss the Coup de Grace. Ziggler grabs a rollup but gets reversed into a second rollup to give Balor the pin at 12:15.

Rating: C-. I got more out of this match than I got out of all the Balor vs. Bobby Lashley matches combined. The trilogy of matches served no apparent purpose other than to fill time, didn’t advance either guy and offered no emotion from either of them. This match, while not exactly a classic, had a purpose, told a story, and made Balor look impressive for fighting from behind while setting up another match. That’s actual booking, rather than just throwing matches out there.

Post break Stephanie puts Balor on the team and gives him, Ziggler and McIntyre a pep talk about how they need to destroy Smackdown, including her brother Shane (WE KNOW WHO YOUR BROTHER IS! STOP ACTING LIKE NO ONE KNOWS HIS NAME!).

We look back at Becky Lynch calling out Ronda Rousey last week on Smackdown.

Rousey wasn’t mocking Becky last week and lists off a bunch of things that Becky learned while she was learning armbars. Becky is so hypersensitive that she’s the millennial man with skinny jeans and avocado toast. Ronda isn’t Charlotte and Becky isn’t Oliver Twist. Her fans have been here with her every single week and she didn’t change the definition of “fight like a girl” so the face of the women’s revolution could call herself the man. Nia and Tamina (ERG) come in and wish her luck. Great intensity from Ronda here, though pretty clearly reading from a script.

Survivor Series rundown.

Tag Team Battle Royal

Lucha House Party, Bobby Roode/Chad Gable, Ascension, B-Team, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Revival

Yes they’re actually doing this AGAIN because WE NEED CAPTAINS BLAST IT! Slater gets tossed out early, meaning Rhyno has to leave as well. Kalisto saves Lince Dorado, who pulls Scott Dawson to the apron with him. Gran Metalik gets rid of the Revival but Ascension gets rid of the luchadors. There goes the B Team as well, leaving us with the Ascension and Roode/Gable. A neckbreaker/moonsault combination hits Viktor but Konnor makes the save. Not that it matters as Gable pulls Konnor over the top for the win at 3:08.

Rating: D-. What kind of a battle royal is barely three minutes long. That would be a good one in case you weren’t paying enough attention. I’ve ranted enough about how stupid it is to have these captain spots when it’s all just a part of the battle for brand supremacy anyway. Gable and Roode are fine as a team and they win one of the most meaningless awards ever. Good for them.

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar for a chat. Heyman gets in his usual start and says Strowman deserves congratulations. At Crown Jewel, Strowman proved that he is an ALMOST unbeatable monster when it took five F5’s to put him down. Further congratulations to Strowman for getting back into the title picture after such a loss.

Congratulations are also in order to the Smackdown locker room for avoiding the beating that is coming to AJ Styles this Sunday. Heyman recaps AJ’s loss to Lesnar last year and makes a Hotel California reference (Heyman: “For those of you who don’t get the reference, go home and Google it b******.”). There is no one on Raw, Smackdown, NXT or in the UFC who can hang with Lesnar and no one he wants to beat up more than AJ. That’s why this Sunday, Lesnar will show that he’s the champion of champions.

Heyman is about to call that a spoiler but Jinder Mahal of all people interrupts. Last year, Mahal was focused on facing Lesnar and it cost him the WWE Championship. Mahal has a mantra for Lesnar, and Brock is actually willing to let him come in and say it. Lesnar to Heyman: “You should really hear this. After all, you’re Jewish.” Mahal explains shanti and the required beating cuts him off, with the Singh Brothers taking the most devastating German suplexes I’ve ever seen. Brock throws one of them over the top at Jinder but the Singh bounces off of him. That earns Mahal an F5 for improper catching technique.

Survivor Series Qualifying Match: Bobby Lashley vs. Elias

Before the match, Lio Rush talks about how perfect Lashley’s physique is and we get some poses, including the double glutes. Thankfully Elias cuts them off but he’s making a phone call. Elias introduces himself and tells child protective services that Lashley has kidnapped a child and is forcing him to point out various muscles. He was even bent over in front of the child! The authorities need to get here soon because Lashley and Rush have a tendency to make people fall asleep in a hurry. Lashley wants to fight so Elias says he sucks and heads to the ring.

We’re joined in progress with Elias fighting out of a chinlock and sending Lashley to the floor for a knee from the apron. Lashley sends him into the post though and Rush grabs Elias’ leg for the countout at 2:11. Well at least he didn’t take a clean fall this soon into his face turn.

Post match Elias grabs Rush and sends a charging Lashley into the post. Rush tries to run but gets thrown onto Elias for his efforts.

Here’s Alexa Bliss, flanked by Mickie James, Tamina and Nia, to announce the captains of the Raw women’s team. Bliss talks about the great team she’s put together, which includes Natalya who is off channeling her aggression to use on Sunday. That leaves one open spot (I had forgotten Alexa wasn’t in the match because she’s in the ring, since WE MUST HAVE A CAPTAIN WHO ISN’T EVEN IN THE MATCH!) so the winner of the following match gets the final roster spot.

Sasha Banks vs. Bayley

Banks goes for an early rollup and knees Bayley in the head to knock her off the apron. The Meteora gets two but Bayley elbows Sasha off the apron this time. Sasha sends her into the post though and hits the running Meteora to drive Bayley head first into it again. The third Meteora only hits post though and they’re both down.

Bayley is right back up with a Bayley to Belly on the apron (find a new place to fight) as we take a break. Back with Bayley’s top rope elbow hitting knees (apparently Bayley’s elbow is less effective than a cabinet door because Sasha’s knee is fine) so the Bank Statement goes on, drawing in Tamina and Jax for the double DQ at 8:32.

Rating: D+. The violence was good but egads I’m sick of these endings with the double DQ’s. Granted that might just be because Tamina has been in three different segments tonight and I just want this show to end. This was fun while it lasted with the Bayley to Belly looking great, but the ending was lame, which isn’t exactly surprising.

Post match Bliss laughs it off and introduces Ruby Riott as the final pick. The Riott Squad comes out but we cut to the back where Becky Lynch has Rousey in the Disarm-Her. She lets it go and comes to the ring, where the Smackdown women (complete with Charlotte, who is suddenly fine with everything from Tuesday, and Mandy Rose/the Iconics, who aren’t on the team in the first place) come in for the big brawl.

Ronda comes in but her arm is done. Becky, who looks to have a broken nose, grabs a chair and hits her in the arm again as the Smackdown women destroy everyone. Another chair to the arm has Rousey in trouble as Bliss watches on from the ramp. A long staredown between Rousey and Becky (the blood on her face adds a lot)….doesn’t end the show.

We cut to the back where Stephanie is yelling at Corbin over what just happened. She’s still yelling as we cut back to a furious Rousey to end the show. The big brawl was really good and Becky looked like a STAR, but closing on Stephanie yelling took the life out of what was an otherwise great closing segment.

Overall Rating: D. I’m really torn on this one as there’s some good stuff included (the closing segment, Ambrose/Rollins, McIntyre looking to have completely eclipsed Ziggler, Ronda’s fire and Lesnar wrecking Mahal and company) but then there’s nearly EVERYTHING else, which almost completely focused on either Stephanie, Tamina (I still need someone to tell me what WWE sees in her) or this obsession with having captains who pick the teams for Survivor Series.

I’ve been watching wrestling since the late 1980s and I’ve been a WWF/E fan for that entire time. Out of every show they do, Survivor Series was my favorite for a long time. I know it doesn’t matter as much compared to Wrestlemania or the Royal Rumble, but I’ve always liked that team concept and taking all these feuds that have been going on and piling them together into one match where you get some fun combinations.

Now though, WWE has taken that away. There’s no personal feud between the two brands and the focus is all on the show’s bosses. The feuds are now on the teams themselves and we get some invasion angle to set up the matches. The fun part of it is gone and now it’s all about Raw vs. Smackdown and brand supremacy and picking captains who sometime are and sometimes aren’t on the team. That’s all the last two weeks are going to be while Stephanie yells about how important this is to Raw and makes everyone feel beneath her.

I’ve been a wrestling fan for a long time and this is one of the first times where I’ve ever felt like what they’re doing isn’t for me. I used to look forward to Survivor Series every year and now I can’t wait for it to be over so we can move on to something I’ll probably like a lot more. Survivor Series used to be fun and now it’s just a show where they can get in as many buzzwords as they can while making sure the wrestlers look as unimportant as they can. Thanks for that WWE. It took 30 years but you finally took the fun away from my favorite show.

Results

Tag Team Battle Royal went to a no contest when Braun Strowman interfered

Tamina Snuka b. Ember Moon – Superfly Splash

Finn Balor b. Dolph Ziggler – Rollup

Chad Gable/Bobby Roode won a tag team battle royal last eliminating Ascension

Bobby Lashley b. Elias via countout

Bayley vs. Sasha Banks went to a double DQ when Nia Jax and Tamina interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

So I haven’t been a fan of Mixed Match Challenge this season but this should make it a lot more interesting.https://www.wwe.com/wwe-mmc-winners-to-receive-rumble-opportunity-and-trip-anywhere-in-the-world

The official prize for the winners is getting to be the #30 entrants in both Royal Rumble matches (and a vacation each).  See, now that’s the kind of thing that makes this feel important.  It was cool to have the winners’ charity get money last time, but this is something that is going to have an impact on the big stories.  Of course it also limits the realistic winners, but it’s nice to see something that actually matters come out of this.  I’m pleased, though not as pleased as I’ll be when this thing is finally over.

IMG Credit: Major League Wrestling

Fusion #30
Date: November 9, 2018
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Matt Striker, Tony Schiavone

How in the world are we this far into this series already? We’re not quite to Fightland’s tapings yet but things are about to get a lot better in a hurry around here. This week’s main event isn’t too bad either though, as we have Low Ki defending the World Title against Konnan’s latest talent in Daga. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Konnan and company vs. Promociones Dorado. That’s the biggest feud in the show’s history so far and a recap like this is nice every now and then.

Opening sequence.

Myron Reed vs. Marko Stunt

They take turns missing each other to start as Striker says Stunt reminds him of Rob Schneider. Reed gets in the first big shot with a jumping enziguri, only to miss a splash in the corner. Stunt scores with a dropkick and a middle rope springboard spinning seated crossbody (that’s a rather descriptive name) gets two. A suplex gets two on Stunt but he nips back up for a knee to the face. Not bad actually.

Stunt tries a suplex but gets caught with a Stundog Millionaire. Reed goes to the ramp for a dive over the top into a cutter (SWEET!) for two but Stunt reverses an F5 into a Canadian Destroyer for no cover. Stunt tries a sunset flip but Reed reverses into one of his own for the pin at 5:10.

Rating: C+. The spots alone here were cool with that running cutter still being a great looking move, though I’m not sure what the point is in having Stunt lose twice. He’s kind of a big deal at the moment and they’re having him lose his first two matches. It’s not like Reed is all that big of a star in the first place so giving Stunt a win might not be the worst idea in the world. Still though, fun little match.

Earlier this week, MJF and Aria Blake were at an autograph signing with Shane Strickland not showing up as planned. A kid came up and got charged for an autograph in a great jerk move.

Salina de la Renta and Low Ki aren’t impressed by Konnan bringing Daga in. Low Ki asks if Konnan has been paying attention as he destroys all of Konnan’s boys. Now Konnan is bringing someone else in and giving him a golden ticket. He’s leading these people to slaughter and it’s going to take a lot of work to get the title off of him.

We look back at Sami Callihan choking out Tom Lawlor a few weeks back.

Sami says anyone he sets his sights on takes him out. It’s been MVP, Strickland and Jimmy Havoc and he’ll take out anyone else that comes after him because he’s for hire. Thumbs up, thumbs down.

Middleweight Title: Jason Cade vs. Jimmy Yuta vs. Maxwell Jacob Friedman

Friedman, with Blake, is defending and this is under elimination rules. Yuta goes right at Cade as the bell rings so MJF bails to the floor, leaving Cade to stomp Yuta down. Back up and a paid of suicide dives have Yuta back in control and a standing backsplash gets two on Cade. Everyone gets back in and Cade saves MJF from Yuta with a jumping knee to the head. Yuta can’t quite fight off the double teaming and MJF and Cade can’t figure out if it should be a fist bump or a handshake.

Instead MJF hits Cade by mistake, followed by Cade “accidentally” doing the same to MJF. Yuta is smart enough to clothesline them both and a double missile dropkick puts them down again. A belly to back superplex is countered into a powerbomb from Cade, who hits a Burning Hammer on MJF onto Yuta (always works). Yuta is fine enough to send Cade face first into the middle buckle but MJF is back up with something like an Angle Slam into a faceplant.

Everyone is down so they hit the three way slugout, which actually doesn’t feel like a cliché. MJF pokes them both in the eyes so it’s a double superkick, only to have MJF kick Yuta down as well. Yuta is back up with the Octopus Hold on Cade, plus an ankle lock on MJF (didn’t look great). That’s broken up so Yuta rolls Cade up for the elimination at 7:50. Blake offers a quick distraction though and Cade gives Yuta a low blow into the backslide driver so MJF can retain at 8:53.

Rating: C+. Another rather nice match here as they’re still doing a good job of making the middleweights feel important. Just calling them by a weight class makes it feel like they’re not as important but they’re treated as a big deal and the de facto midcard title. Yuta has grown on me a lot and Cade fits as a heel. MJF stealing the pin to retain the title is fine as well and this was better than I was expecting with all three working well together.

We look back at the Hart Foundation beating down Kevin Sullivan.

Sullivan calls in to say he has a concussion and it’s the most lingering one he’s ever had. He’s doesn’t like Brian Pillman Jr. hanging around the rest of the Harts but thinks there might be some shenanigans at hand. Sullivan has to do something here though, even if it hurts Pillman.

Konnan loves the idea of an unknown (around here at least) like Daga to get a shot at the title in his debut match. He knows Fenix had Low Ki beat until Salina got involved by stealing Fenix’s mask, so tonight Konnan is running interference.

MLW is coming to Miami for Never Say Never and Zero Hour (names of some of their return specials).

MLW World Title: Daga vs. Low Ki

Low Ki is defending and has Salina with him while Daga has Konnan. Feeling out process to start with Daga rolling out of a wristlock. A kick to the chest (from his back) gets Low Ki out of trouble so Daga takes him into the corner and gives him a little slap. That’s enough of the easy stuff for Low Ki, who headbutts him down to take over. Striker gets to drop a bunch of Japanese names as Low Ki gets chopped out to the floor. It’s too early for the big dive (at least Low Ki was smart enough to know it was coming) so Daga goes to the floor for more chops.

A whip into the barricade cuts Daga off though and Low Ki is starting to look more intense. Daga is sat on a chair for a running dropkick to the face as Konnan is looking worried. Well having your guy get kicked in the face should worry you. The reverse chinlock is broken up pretty quickly and Low Ki is holding his leg. It’s fine enough to kick away at Daga but he sends the champ outside in a heap.

That means it’s time for Salina to panic and Daga snaps off a hurricanrana. Some more chops wake Low Ki up so Daga sends him into the corner and puts on something like a Crossface. Cue Ricky Martinez for a distraction so the hold is broken, allowing Low Ki to rip at Daga’s cauliflower ears (FREAKING OW MAN!). The top rope double stomp to the back retains the title at 11:20 as Daga’s ear is gushing blood.

Rating: B-. Good showing from Daga here, even if there was no chance of a title change in what was just a one off title shot. Konnan bringing in a variety of people to go after Low Ki is a cool story and could be leading to him having some big final name. Low Ki has been feeling it as of late and as strange as it may seem, it might be due to the lack of the suit. He looks more serious now and that’s how you want to present the World Champion. Another good match here, which is becoming a trend.

Post match Low Ki calls Tom Lawlor a joke, just like Fenix and Pentagon.

Overall Rating: B. MLW is on a roll right now and this was another solid show with nothing bad and the stories being advanced. They showed more promise here by not having a lot of the big names appear but still putting on an entertaining show. It’s a good sign that they aren’t reliant on the same handful of people to carry a show and that’s going to pay off for them in the long run.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: November 8, 2018
Location: Manchester Arena, Manchester, Arena
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson

We’ve got one more show in England and things have been, shall we say, really pretty dull so far. I’m not sure what we’ll be seeing in the way of highlights but it would be nice to have a few British wrestlers around on the show, just to give things a little bit of flavor. Or they could go with the same stuff we always see around here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Tyler Breeze vs. Mojo Rawley

So much for fun. Mojo clotheslines him down at the bell and sends Breeze hard into the corner for a running shoulder to the ribs. Breeze gets sent into the corner again and that means the chinlock goes on. The comeback is cut off by another chinlock but Breeze fights up with a superkick this time.

The middle rope crossbody is rolled through, only to have Breeze slip out of a fall away slam and grab a half crab. That means the dramatic crawl to the ropes so Breeze superkicks him off the apron. Back in and Mojo charges into a raised boot to the face, allowing Breeze to go up. This time the high crossbody is rolled through again but Breeze rolls it over again for the pin at 5:04.

Rating: C. Not too shabby at all here, especially considering how many times these two have probably had the same match. Rawley’s career is as alive as my chances to be Miss Nevada 1974 and while Breeze is still good, it’s clear that WWE doesn’t want him for anything more than this until Breezango can reform, because Heaven forbid they let him be the character or performer that worked so well in NXT. You know, where they developed him.

From Raw.

The roster is on the stage and there are security guards at ringside as Baron Corbin comes out. After some clips of Brock Lesnar winning the Universal Title again (just go with it), Corbin talks about Survivor Series and lists off some of the upcoming matches. In addition to just winning for pride though, Raw has a score to settle because Shane McMahon stole the title of Best in the World from Dolph Ziggler. Don’t worry though, because Stephanie McMahon will be here next week to deal with that (You knew it was coming.).

As for the men’s Survivor Series match, Corbin has named himself as captain, meaning he won’t be in the actual match. Therefore, he has to put together a great team, which will start with Dolph Ziggler and Drew McIntyre. Another member is Braun Strowman, who might not be happy with Corbin right now. We’ll call Crown Jewel a teaching moment though and Strowman will learn soon enough.

As for the women’s Survivor Series match, the captain will be picking the full team, so here’s Alexa Bliss. She’ll use her leadership as a five time Women’s Champion to pick her team tonight, starting with the Riott Squad vs. Bayley/Sasha Banks/Natalya. Cue Kurt Angle to say he wants to compete again this year, just like last year when he lead Team Raw to victory.

Corbin doesn’t think so because Angle needs to be permanently gone from the show. They reach an agreement: tonight Angle vs. Corbin with the winner getting to be the captain. Angle leaves and Bliss tells the women to get ready but here’s Strowman to storm the ring. Security is dispatched in all of five seconds and Corbin runs off. The roster goes after Strowman as well but he gets through them all while everyone else brawls. In the back, Strowman can’t find Corbin. This ends Exposition Theater, as we fly towards Survivor Series as fast as possible.

From Raw.

Drew McIntyre vs. Kurt Angle

If Angle wins, he’s team captain at Survivor Series. Angle jumps him before the bell but McIntyre blasts him with a headbutt. We hit the armbar, which might actually cause Angle’s arm to come off his body. A neckbreaker sets up a second armbar but Angle pops up with an Angle Slam to put McIntyre on the floor.

Back from a break with McIntyre hitting a suplex and putting on a third armbar. McIntyre picks him up…..and the armbar goes on again. Angle fights out of it (probably due to familiarity) and rolls the German suplexes. The Claymore kicks Angle’s head off….and Drew doesn’t cover. OH MY GOODNESS JUST END THE SHOW ALREADY!!! Angle goes for the leg but Drew pounds him down and glares at him again.

To really show off, Drew sticks his leg out so Angle lunches again, earning himself another beatdown. Drew calls Angle an embarrassment and now the ankle lock goes on. The hold is kicked off and Drew gives him an Angle Slam before sitting in the middle of the ring instead of covering. Drew puts him in an ankle lock with the grapevine and Kurt taps at 14:36.

Rating: D. They had an idea here with McIntyre wanting to humiliate Angle but egads how many times can we see Old Man Angle get beaten down like this? It wasn’t really interesting the first time and this was a long match to end an already awful show. This was much more about the storytelling than the wrestling and Drew played the heel well, but it was the wrong place and the wrong time.

From Smackdown.

Jeff Hardy vs. Samoa Joe

The winner is on the team and Miz and Bryan are on commentary. Joe goes straight at Hardy in the corner to start and even shouts trash talk at Bryan. Jeff is right back up and tries the Twist of Fate but Joe bails to the floor. Back in and Joe runs him over with an elbow and we take a break. We come back with Joe peppering him with right hands in the corner and the enziguri getting two.

The neck crank keeps Jeff in trouble until Joe takes him outside for a whip into the barricade. This serves as a backdrop for Bryan and Miz’s latest argument, meaning they ignore Jeff walking the barricade for the clothesline. Back in and the basement dropkick gets two on Joe, followed by the Twisting Stunner. The Swanton hits knees (in a great looking crash) and Hardy taps to the Clutch at 9:27.

Rating: C-. This was just going through the motions until the ending and there’s nothing wrong with that, especially given the story here. Joe is the better choice for the spot here, though that landing on the Swanton alone should give Jeff something. Maybe a nice back brace or a full body cast at this point.

Post match Joe talks more trash to Bryan and the fight is on. Miz breaks it up so Bryan beats him up as well, only to have Shane come in for the save. Bryan flips him over, not realizing who it was. Shane is incensed as Bryan walks off to end the show.

Recap of the old man tag match at Crown Jewel. Why did you have to bring that up again?

Revival vs. Chad Gable/Bobby Roode

In case you didn’t get enough of these two on Raw. I’ll let you figure out who I mean. Dawson headlocks Gable to start and gets headscissored down in one of the moves Gable always nails to near perfection. Roode comes in to drop a knee on a monkey flipped Dawson but Wilder trips him up from the floor. That means a double headbutt to Roode and the drop toehold sets up a running legdrop to the back of the head.

Roode gets chinlocked but is fine enough to send Dawson into the corner. There’s the hot tag off to Gable so things can pick up, including a rolling Liger kick to Dawson. Everything breaks down and a double clothesline puts the Revival on the floor as we take a break. Back with Gable in trouble in the corner as the Revival stomp away, followed by a Gory Stretch from Wilder.

Gable slips out but Dawson runs in for the save, meaning a slingshot suplex for two. Wilder adds some long form chinlockery until Gable can send him outside. Now the hot tag brings in Roode and it’s time for clotheslines and a spinebuster. The Blockbuster to Dawson sets up a moonsault for two with Wilder having to make a save. Roode gets sent outside, leaving Gable to try Rolling Chaos Theory on Dawson. Wilder makes a blind tag though and it’s the Shatter Machine for the pin at 11:26.

Rating: B-. That’s the best Main Event match in what feels like years with both teams looking great and a hot finish. Every now and then you’ll see some people go out there and work hard and that’s what happened here. I had a really good time with this one and never would have guessed that coming in. I’ll always take a surprise like this and I’m almost stunned at how good it was.

And one more time from Raw.

Here’s Seth Rollins, with both Tag Team Titles, for a chat. He knows the three titles look a little weird but it was supposed to be three titles and a big trophy. That brings him to Lesnar, who is slapping everyone in the face by holding Roman Reigns’ title. He would tell Lesnar that to his face, but Lesnar isn’t here tonight. Seth: “Shocker, I know.”

Dean Ambrose is here tonight though and Seth wants him right here in his face. Ambrose isn’t here though and that means Rollins can’t defend the Tag Team Titles by himself. Corbin pops up on screen and, after telling his guys to barricade the door, makes a title match for right now.

Tag Team Titles: AOP vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is defending and starts with Akam, who drives him into the wrong corner. Rezar comes in and blasts Rollins with a clothesline as the numbers are already becoming a problem. Back from a break with Rollins fighting out of a chinlock but getting taken down and pummeled without much effort. The Last Chapter is broken up and Rezar is clotheslined to the floor for a suicide dive.

Back in and Akam is sent outside for a double suicide dive in a rather nice hope spot. A Sling Blade hits Rezar back inside and it’s time to stomp the foot. Drake Maverick offers a distraction but the side slam/middle rope stomp is broken up. Rollins knees Rezar in the face and hits the frog splash for two but the stomp is countered into a heck of a powerbomb. The powerbomb/neckbreaker gives us new champions at 9:47.

Rating: C. They had to do something with the titles and putting the titles on these monsters is as good of an idea as they had. Rollins made a go of it though and that was far more entertaining than I was expecting. AOP will be fine and can run through some teams until someone finally derails them. Not a bad match here, with Rollins trying as hard as he could.

Post match here’s Ambrose to say Rollins wants to know why. Rollins asks why and gets hit with Dirty Deeds.

Overall Rating: C+. Who would have thought that Gable and Roode would have been able to power a show this far? The stuff from earlier in the week wasn’t great but some of the more eventful stuff was at least interesting enough to make most of it work. There actually is a way to make this show work and they pulled off a pretty good one here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2011
Date: November 20, 2011
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 16,749
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

The whole history thing starts us off again, as always. The rest of the video of course turns to focus on the Rock.

US Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. John Morrison

The fans now think this is boring so Dolph jumps over John in the corner and hits a dropkick to take over. Off to a headlock by the champion as the fans still want Ryder. Dolph gets thrown to the floor and Morrison hits a big corkscrew dive to take the champ out. Vickie offers an annoying distraction and Ziggler takes over back inside. Ziggler takes Morrison down and nips up in a good athletic display before hooking a near Crossface.

Divas Title: Eve Torres vs. Beth Phoenix

David Otunga (a wrestler with a real life law degree from Harvard) comes in to annoy Punk and says Cole deserves an apology from some attack by Punk. Punk says let me go become world champion first.

Team Barrett vs. Team Orton

Wade Barrett, Cody Rhodes, Jack Swagger, Hunico, Dolph Ziggler

Randy Orton, Kofi Kingston, Sheamus, Mason Ryan, Sin Cara

Off to Sheamus vs. Cody now with the Irishman quickly getting annoyed. He pounds Rhodes down in the corner and hits the ten forearms in the ropes, which they tried to name some Irish word. It lasted about two weeks before they realized it speaks for itself pretty well. Cody tries to low bridge Sheamus but Sheamus lands on the apron. Barrett decks the Irishman and Hunico comes in with a springboard dropkick to the knee.

The ring is reenforced for the next match after Big Show and Henry broke the ring at Vengeance, hence the rematch here.

World Heavyweight Championship: Mark Henry vs. Big Show

The New York National Guard is here.

We recap Punk vs. Del Rio. Del Rio cashed in MITB at Summerslam after Punk won, Cena beat Del Rio at Vengeance, Del Rio won a three way with Punk and Cena in the Cell, tonight is the rematch from Summerslam, if you call that a match.

WWE Championship: CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Alberto is defending. Del Rio has Ricardo Rodriguez introduce him, so CM Punk brings out his own ring announcer: HOWARD FINKEL! Round one goes to Punk. Howard waddles out and seems genuinely choked up by the reaction he gets. The fans want ice cream which is a thing Punk said he wanted in his own image. Feeling out process to start as Punk does his headlock so he can call spots to Del Rio.

^th armbar of the match. Punk breaks that one as well but charges into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two.

Punk celebrates for a long time post match. He would hold the title for over a year in the longest reign in over twenty years.

Awesome Truth vs. The Rock/John Cena

Ratings Comparison

Dolph Ziggler vs. John Morrison

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Beth Phoenix vs. Eve Torres

Original: C

Redo: C

Team Barrett vs. Team Orton

Original: B-

Redo: B

Big Show vs. Mark Henry

Original: B-

Redo: C+

CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Original: C+

Redo: A

The Rock/John Cena vs. Awesome Truth

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: A

The World Title really changed things for me here. Still a great show though.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/20/survivor-series-2011-rock-still-has-it/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

They had a nice little sense of humor here and you don’t get that often enough.  Though some of the lines in here are so WWE-ized it’s amazing.

And of course it’s WWE Champion.  I’d get too bored sitting around otherwise.  And I hate red.

IMG Credit: Lucha Underground

Lucha Underground
Date: November 7, 2018
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

It’s the final show of the season and that means we should be in for something good. If there’s one thing that Lucha Underground knows how to do, it’s the big show at the end of the year because this is where you’ll get to the good stuff. The big match is Pentagon Dark challenging Marty Martinez for the title and you know something bad is going down there. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you’re interested.

The opening video looks at a lot of the backstage stuff from over the series, with a big focus on the Cuetos and their bosses trying to take over the world.

Johnny Mundo is warming up with the gauntlet as Taya isn’t sure about this. He seems a little too excited about it and asks if Taya is going to be there tonight. She wouldn’t miss it for the Mundo. Johnny says he loves her in case he gets sacrificed tonight and leaves. Ricky Mundo’s doll loves Taya too because she’s the perfect host. Taya seems to have been possessed, which is never a good sign.

El Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Fenix

2/3 falls, no countouts and no DQ. They go straight to the loud kicks to the head to start with Fenix getting the better of things and sending a charging Dragon into the corner. A sunset bomb gives Dragon two and he sends Fenix outside for the big springboard dive. Back in and Fenix avoids the 450 so Dragon heads up top, where he gets caught by a palm strike to the face. The Black Fire Driver gives Fenix the first fall at 2:22.

We take a break and come back with Fenix bringing in a chair and a table. That takes too long though and Dragon hits some clotheslines before they go head to head. Dragon is right back with the tornado DDT for the second fall at 4:23. This brings out Antonio Cueto to say let’s make the third fall falls count anywhere.

Back in and they both head up to the same corner, with Dragon hitting a wheelbarrow driver through another table. A chair gets added to the mix but Melissa Santos begs for them to calm down. The distraction lets Fenix BLAST Dragon with a chair and drive him through another table. A second Black Fire Driver finishes Dragon at 15:22.

Rating: B. Now that’s how you open a big show as both guys beat the heck out of each other and Melissa getting involved keeps Dragon somewhat safe. Dark Fenix is a heck of a villain and the kind of guy who could go a long way. Dragon is still growing on me, but that high flying is hard to ignore, even against someone as talented as Fenix.

Melissa can’t make the announcement and leaves in tears.

Back from a break and Antonio says Melissa has left the building. Therefore, here is your new ring announcer: Shaul Guerrero. Well that’s certainly lucha royalty. Shaul says she’s honored to be here and starts introducing the next match but here’s Famous B. to interrupt. He’s the only guest announcer we can have around here and doesn’t know Shaul or her family. If she wants to REALLY be famous, she can call him. Shaul: “EXCUSE ME!” Well you know that’s getting a pop.

She lists off her family members, including her father Eddie. Apparently the B stands for b**** and a fight is teased but here’s Chavo Jr. for the save. A shot to the face allows Shaul to hit Three Amigos and Chavo adds a frog splash. I’m not big on Chavo but this was excellent and the best feel good moment this place has had in a long time.

The Mack vs. Mil Muertes

Death match so Mil wheels out a casket with DEATH MATCH painted on the top. Mack’s early kick to the face is caught, meaning it’s a loud “OH S***!” A running knee to the head rocks Muertes and he gets sent outside for a flip dive from Mack. They fight on the apron with Muertes getting the better of it and going to find a second casket. An X Factor drops Mack face first onto one of them and Muertes fires off clotheslines in the corner.

The tenth misses though and Muertes gets dropped in the corner for a Cannonball. Mack goes to find out what’s in the casket….and it’s a bunch of weapons, including an ax. This is going to hurt isn’t it? He spends a long time looking though and it’s a suicide dive to take him down instead. Muertes clears out the rest of the coffin (including a brick and a sickle among other things) before throwing Mack back inside.

Mack misses a swing with an ax (well, death would make sense) and gets ice picked in the head. A running clothesline gets Mack out of trouble and it’s time for a metal trashcan. Mack manages a Coast to Coast with said can for two but Muertes is right back with a swinging chokeslam. They head outside with Mack going for the mask (a rarity for Muertes), which seems to shake Muertes.

Back in and Mack gets two off a running DDT, followed by the standing moonsault for the same. The Flatliner gets Muertes out of trouble for two (BIG pop for the kickout) as Vampiro is rather pleased that Striker is enjoying the violence like this. Mack is right back with a pair of Stunners, followed by a BRICK to the head and another Stunner (complete with middle fingers and an F bomb) for the pin at 12:53.

Rating: B+. That’s the kind of Mack that makes you see the kind of star he really can become. He has some great charisma and I’m still curious as to why WWE let him go so soon. Beating Muertes is a big enough deal but to do it in a match where Muertes should excel is even better. That’s a big win for Mack and I’d love to see more of him in the next season.

Post match Mack throws him in the casket and pours some beer on top for a little Austin flavor.

Johnny Mundo vs. Matanza

A German suplex drops Johnny again but he slips out of Wrath of the Gods and scores with the Moonlight Drive. End of the World mostly connects for two so Mundo goes up, only to get caught in a belly to back superplex with Mundo landing on his face. With Matanza going near the gauntlet, Johnny dives underneath the ring to distract him. That’s enough to get the gauntlet but Matanza doesn’t let him get it on. Matanza throws it up onto the balcony for some reason so Johnny goes for a climb and jumps for it….but gets caught and slammed face first into a wall. Again, well so much for that.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of goofy fun that has been missing from Lucha Underground for so long. It was so over the top and insane with cool visuals and nothing more than a hero fighting a monster. The Superman Punch alone made it look like a scene from a comic book. What more could you possibly want from this?

Post break, Aerostar tries to get the gauntlet back from Johnny but he’s not sure. Aerostar convinces him to take it off though and Johnny is off to celebrate with Taya.

Lucha Underground Title: Marty Martinez vs. Pentagon Dark

Martinez is defending and anything goes. They both bring chairs and Pentagon pelts his at Marty’s head to start. Marty gets kicked around the ring and a posting busts him open. That means it’s time to bring in the weapons and DANG Martinez is bleeding badly. Pentagon blocks a whip through a table and superkicks Marty, only to get sent through the table a few seconds later.

A few kendo sticks rock Pentagon and they head inside for the first time with Marty rips at the mask. It’s time for a lunchbox, and of course that means the fork going into Pentagon’s forehead. They head outside and Marty buries him underneath a bunch of chairs. Shockingly enough, Marty is capable of rolling out from a pile of chairs and hits a package piledriver on the floor. That’s only good for two back inside and Marty gets him caught in the Tree of Woe, complete with a trashcan around Pentagon’s head.

Marty finds a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire to beat on the can a bit….and let’s have some gasoline. Pentagon gets doused but he kicks the lighter away. The shot with the bat hits the rope and bounces back into Marty’s head because he’s not bleeding enough yet. They head outside again with Pentagon sending him through a well placed glass window (Striker: “OH S***!”). Pentagon sets up six chairs back inside and a package piledriver through them is enough to give Pentagon the title back at 12:33.

Rating: B. That’s exactly what this needed to be: mindless violence and destruction with Pentagon winning the fair (ish) fight. These guys beat the heck out of each other and got into the higher levels of carnage, which is what these matches call for. I don’t think anyone bought Marty as a long term champion and Pentagon has been the star of this place since the beginning. This made sense and was a lot of fun, but you know things aren’t over yet.

Lucha Underground Title: Jake Strong vs. Pentagon Dark

Strong is challenging and the ankle lock goes on. Pentagon’s ankle is snapped and the referee calls it at 40 seconds to make Strong champion, with the fans being rather displeased (you can imagine their chant).

Dragon Azteca, King Cuerno and Aerostar meet to talk about the gauntlet. They agree it must go back into hiding but Dragon says they need to strike now to give them the advantage they need. Dragon gets to take it and mentions a she that needs to use it.

Black Lotus comes in to see Matanza, who she knows killed her parents. She has the gauntlet….and RIPS HIS BEATING HEART OUT, killing him (in theory of course). Dragon comes in to say her parents can finally be at peace. She says Dragon can be too and leaves. Strong, wearing the title and a suit, comes in to break Dragon’s ankle and takes the gauntlet, saying it belongs to “us”.

Johnny comes in to see the still possessed Taya, saying it’s time for their honeymoon. Taya says she’s not his wife and chokes him against a locker. The laughing doll can be heard and Taya says she’s god.

Antonio meets with the big bads from earlier, who say everything is coming together. Apparently the gods have taken human forms and the title is back in their control. Strong comes in with the title, saying the blood on his shirt is Matanza’s. As Antonio is sad, the really big boss (who we still haven’t seen), says the Order will never forget Matanza’s sacrifice. The man says they need a new host before leaning forward to reveal Stu Bennett (Bad News/Wade Barrett) who asks if anyone else has any BAD NEWS. Everyone shakes their heads and Bennett says it’s time to take over the world.

We flash back in time to one year ago with Antonio taking the key from Dario’s coffin. Antonio leaves and Aerostar warps in with Catrina’s amulet. He puts it on Dario, who wakes up and says “What the F….” to end the season. To be continued. Now that’s the kind of cliffhanger you use to end a season.

Overall Rating: B+. This show felt like Lucha Underground trying to make up for a lot of lost time in one night and dang if it didn’t work. They know the right buttons to press and did so to near perfection here with a lot of fun action, but more importantly the over the top stories that make this show work so well. You can’t do the same kind of stuff that you see everyone else here and that’s what they seemed to remember this time. I had a great time with this show and it was a ton of fun.

Strong as the new champion doesn’t seem like the best idea as the fans just don’t care, but him being part of the big group of bads makes sense. The problem is it takes them WAY too long to get back to those stories and that hurts things a lot. What matters here though is the show feeling fun and I REALLY hope we get another season, even if it’s the last one to wrap everything up. They seem convinced that another is coming, and with that ending it almost has to. Really good show, though it doesn’t quite make up for the weak season.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Normally I wait for the end of the year for this but for some reason I feel like I should do it now.

This is something I half dread, half look forward to, half need (like math lessons): an annual request for you all to critique me. Basically I’d like to know what I’m doing wrong and what I can do better or what you’d like to see me do more/less of.  All I ask is two things:

1. Be at least somewhat courteous with it. I can be receptive to constructive criticism but less so to ripping me apart, though if that was the case I doubt you’d be here in the first place.

2. Understand that there are some things I can’t/won’t be changing. There are some shows I have to cover for the sake of the hits they get/covering them for other sites. At the same time, there are some shows I’m just not going to cover full time but if it’s something I can fit in, it’s certainly not out of the question. Outside of shows, there might be stuff I do that you don’t like/stuff you’d like me to do more of. If either is the case, please let me know and I’ll see what I can do.

And now, with a gulp, go for it.

KB

IMG Credit: WWE

Bad Blood 2004
Date: June 13, 2004
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Attendance: 9,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for another Raw show and wouldn’t you know it, the main event is Shawn Michaels vs. HHH. This time it’s inside the Cell, with the question being how can they managed to make this match boring too. Other than that we have World Champion Chris Benoit defending the title against Kane and Shelton Benjamin challenging Randy Orton for the Intercontinental Title. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about the Cell, with the far lower matches on the card getting some attention as well. You know, the title matches.

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. Chris Benoit/Edge

La Resistance is defending and sing O Canada in French with Edge’s music cutting them off. That’s rather unfair to some people who are just trying to spread some culture. Benoit, working a double tonight, gets quite the reaction. Edge and Grenier start us off and fight over some basic holds. It’s off to Benoit for a shoulder and a clothesline to put Grenier in some trouble, including a tag back to Edge.

Conway comes in as well and gets booed out of the building. Who knew he actually had some heat with the crowd? Benoit hits a belly to back suplex but Edge gets taken into the champs’ corner and things slow back down. A back first drive into the apron gets two and Grenier puts on a chinlock with a knee in the spine. Grenier drops a legdrop to the to the back of the neck and puts on another chinlock, with the referee very loudly telling Edge SIX.

With the hold not working again, Conway grabs a suplex and hammers away at the head. The fans chant USA, which would likely be for Conway. Dang people make up your minds. Edge finally gets in a spinwheel kick but the champs knock Benoit off the apron. A double suplex is countered into a double neckbreaker though and Benoit is right back up to take the tag anyway. The house cleaning is on and Conway saves Grenier from the Sharpshooter. Edge stops himself before spearing Benoit and Grenier gets caught in the Crossface, but here’s Kane to kick Benoit in the face for the DQ.

Rating: C. This felt like a slightly bigger than average Raw match and the ending is the right call as it ties into the World Title match and gives them a way out of the title change without having Edge or Benoit take a fall. La Resistance can carry the division for a little while and Edge and Benoit have more important things to do. Not a bad job here of getting out of this and everyone getting where they need to go.

Post match it’s chokeslams all around.

Coach is ready to take care of Eugene and Eric Bischoff ensures him that William Regal won’t be at ringside. Of course Eugene is only a few feet away and this time he heard what was said. Eric explains that he’s just trying to protect him. What if Eugene tore his quad like HHH or broke his neck like Benoit? Eugene can leave right now and go home or he can wrestle. The decision involves a very enthusiastic hug.

Chris Jericho vs. Tyson Tomko

Trish Stratus is here with Tomko. Jericho has bad ribs after Tomko powerbombed him through the announcers’ table a few weeks back. Tomko will have nothing to do with Jericho being tentative to start so he hammers Jericho down in the corner. A clothesline keeps Jericho in trouble but he’s right back with a middle rope dropkick. Another dropkick puts Tomko on the floor and Jericho posts him for good measure.

Back in and the required Trish distraction lets Tomko get in a gorilla press gutbuster. At least you can’t fault the logic. The bearhug goes on for a bit until Tomko lets him go but misses a charge in the corner. Jericho rakes the eyes to get out of the gorilla press (cheater) and a chop block takes Tomko down. Trish’s second distraction breaks up the Walls (better than breaking them down) so Jericho settles for a running enziguri and the pin instead.

Rating: C-. They were really smart to keep this one short as Tomko isn’t ready to go into the deeper waters. Jericho walked him through the match just fine and while it wasn’t anything special, they had a perfectly watchable match. They had to do something to get away from Jericho vs. Christian and for a one off short match, this was fine.

We recap Shelton Benjamin vs. Randy Orton. Shelton has pinned him a few times in tag matches but Batista pinned Shelton on Raw to end his winning streak. I’m not sure what the point of that is but at least he got the wins that mattered.

Orton brags about holding the title for so long, including six months from tomorrow and the longest reign in seven years. The fans aren’t happy with this Orton takes the mic and has the cameraman follow him into the arena as he brags about his accomplishments at 24 years old. Orton says they’re looking at real greatness right now and he’s one in a million, unlike the millions of people here. He’s a living legend and the Intercontinental Champion. This brings out Shelton, who says we can have the match right now instead of later. Nice job of mixing things up a bit, which happens so infrequently around here.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Orton vs. Shelton Benjamin

Benjamin is challenging and grabs a rollup for two less than five seconds in. A dropkick puts Orton on the floor and the fans are rather happy to see him. Back in and Orton scores with some right hands but gets clotheslined right back down to the floor. Shelton sends him over the barricade and then takes it back inside for two more off a second rollup. The Stinger Splash (and a very high one at that) misses so here’s Ric Flair for some support.

The chinlock has Benjamin down so he powers up with an electric chair for the break. Orton’s over the shoulder backbreaker into a neckbreaker (always loved that one) gets two and it’s off to the chinlock. With that having served its purpose, Orton goes up but misses the high crossbody. They slug it out and get some rather solid applause until Benjamin takes over with some clotheslines. The top rope version gets two and the Dragon Whip knocks Randy silly for a very delayed cover.

Shelton hits the exploder but Flair is right there to put a foot on the ropes. What a good legendary henchman. Benjamin throws Flair inside, gives him a Stinger Splash and puts on the Figure Four. Orton comes over for the save but Shelton manages to small package him without letting go of the hold for two. That one gets me every time I see it. Shelton goes up for the high crossbody but Orton rolls through and grabs the trunks to retain.

Rating: B-. This got the time to make it work and the ending keeps Shelton looking strong while keeping the title on Orton. Shelton has come a long way in just a few months and you can tell he’s going to be around as we keep going. Orton never even hit the RKO and Shelton had him in trouble for a lot of the match. Good storytelling here and the action worked as well.

Matt Hardy and Lita are in the back where Lita is getting ready for her Women’s Title match. Security comes in and Bischoff ejects Matt from the building. Matt leaves under threats of Lita being removed from the title match.

We look up at the Cell and JR promises the match is still coming. No they didn’t cancel the main event.

Women’s Title: Gail Kim vs. Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Victoria

Victoria is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Everyone stares Trish to the floor to start but she pulls Lita out with her. Cue Tomko to stare Lita down as Victoria hits the dancing moonsault for two on Gail. Tomko interferes again and gets ejected, leaving Lita to hit the reverse Twist of Fate on Trish. Victoria makes a save and all four are back in. A hurricanrana drops Trish’s head on the mat, leaving Gail to put Victoria in the Black Widow.

Trish comes back in for the save and gets the taste slapped out of her mouth by Gail. Lita takes Gail down and awkwardly collides with Victoria in the corner to put all four down. Gail is up but misses a charge into the post, allowing Lita to snap her down with the DDT. Not that it matters as Trish runs in for the rollup to pin Lita for the title.

Rating: D. They were working hard and only botched a few things, which is an upgrade over some of the stuff they do most of the time. Victoria was WAY past her expiration date as champion and Trish has been the biggest name in the division for a long time now. They could only do so much with four women involved plus Tomko in less than five minutes so I can’t really complain that much about everything being rushed.

Jonathan Coachman vs. Eugene

No Regal with Eugene here. Coach is in a Michigan shirt to mock the Ohio State crowd. They shake hands to start with Coach trying to squeeze him down but getting sent to his knees instead. Coach whips him in but Eugene drops to his back and ties himself into a ball, which Coach rolls around the ring. Eventually Eugene sticks a hand out and pulls Coach down into a cover for two.

Another whip sends Eugene to the ropes so Coach drops down, with Eugene dropping right next to him. That means it’s time to ride Coach like a horse as Lawler is getting annoyed. The crisscross starts with Eugene dropping to the floor and accepting a teddy bear from a good looking blonde. Eugene brings it back in with him but gets knocked down, only to take Coach into a bodyscissors and roll him around the ring. The Junkyard Dog offense lets Eugene have some more fun and Coach bails to the floor.

This brings out a good looking woman in a swimsuit carrying a tray of cookies. Eugene goes to get some (cookies that is) but gets knocked into the plate instead. Back in and Eugene Hulks Up for an atomic drop, followed by the airplane spin. Now it’s Garrison Cade coming out to rip the head off the bear. Cade grabs Eugene but gets knocked down by Coach instead. The Rock Bottom and People’s Elbow finish Coach.

Rating: D. Well that was a lot. This could have been a straight match or without the cookie lady but instead they stretched it out and went on a lot further than they needed to. Above all else though, they went back to the comedy stuff here, which was exactly what they should have done in the first place. Longer than it needed to be, but the ending was done right.

Post match Cade and Coach take Stunners as Regal comes in to celebrate. Eugene steals his nose, but is nice enough to give it back.

We recap Chris Benoit vs. Kane. Benoit finally won the big one, then won the big rematch. Now it’s time for a title defense against anyone other than Shawn Michaels or HHH, so Kane won a battle royal to earn the shot. Kane has been more obsessed with Lita and Matt Hardy though, only seeming to remember that he had a title match on this week’s Raw.

Raw World Title: Chris Benoit vs. Kane

Benoit is defending in his second match of the night. Some very loud chops stagger Kane to start and Benoit kicks him into the corner with more aggression than you would usually see from him. Benoit goes to the middle and says bring it so Kane shoves him into the corner. A hard shoulder puts Benoit on the floor but he’s right back in with the enziguri. Kane blocks the Sharpshooter (not the Crossface JR) and uppercuts the heck out of the champ.

A big clothesline to the side of the head puts Benoit down and Kane drops him throat first across the top rope. After a neckbreaker, it’s off to a neck crank as Kane certainly has a logical path here. The comeback is cut off by an uppercut and a forearm to the neck prevents a Sharpshooter attempt. Kane sends him outside before bringing him back in for a rather hard clothesline. With Lawler asking if Kane can get a telethon tomorrow should he win the title, Benoit gets smart by going after the leg. That allows JR to get in the still wrong statement of “Kane won’t be 7ft if he’s on his back.”

The Sharpshooter is countered again but Benoit kicks his way out of a chokeslam attempt. Kane misses the big boot in the corner though and a running dropkick to the leg finally lets Benoit get the Sharpshooter. The dramatic crawl gets Kane to the rope so Benoit rolls the German suplexes instead. Kane sits up before the Swan Dive can launch so it’s back to the suplexes.

Now the Swan Dive can connect but Kane is up at the same time as Benoit. The Crossface is broken up as well and the chokeslam connects for two. Kane boots him down and heads up, only to dive into the Crossface (because Kane didn’t learn from Benoit, who was smart enough to come down when his opponent was starting to stir). The hold is broken through raw power so Benoit switches to the other arm and then goes with a rollup for the pin to retain in a smart move. Ignore the shoulder pretty clearly being off the mat.

Rating: B+. It takes something special to make Kane look energetic but Benoit pulled it off here. I love the ending of Benoit going for one thing throughout the match and then switching up when he knew the submissions weren’t going to work. That’s a very smart ending and it makes Benoit look more versatile at the same time. Really good match here with Kane looking like a monster who had more than one chance and Benoit working him way around him.

Post match Benoit says tonight, Kane learned that he’s for real. He actually looks at some of the highlights and acknowledges Kane’s power but says it took someone real to take him down.

The Cell is lowered. JR, get your ridiculous metaphors in now.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. HHH, which exists because for some reason we just can’t escape it. Shawn tried to beat him last year, then went to a draw with him at the Royal Rumble, then didn’t win at Wrestlemania, then lost at Backlash. Now you might think that all these losses and draws (read as NOT WINS) would be enough to get Shawn out of the main event but that would be crazy talk. This is the big blowoff between the two of them, because the world was begging for it.

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

Inside the Cell and HHH has the white boots again. They stare at each other for the better part of a minute to start, meaning HHH is in epic mode tonight. Thankfully they start fighting with the slugout in the corner until HHH elbows him hard in the jaw. Shawn is right back up with more right hands but HHH sends him outside. A ram into the Cell lets Shawn take over and they head back inside as the announcers talk about how both guys want this to be final. Oh I think there are more than just the two of them.

Shawn busts out the Ted DiBiase fist drop (cool) but charges into a boot and gets thrown outside. That just earns HHH a whip into the Cell and he’s busted open. Back in again and Shawn stays on the cut but his back seems to be giving him problems. HHH is smart enough to send Shawn hard into the corner, with JR saying that HHH is one of the strongest men in the history of WWE. Did Stephanie feed him that line? Some elbows to the back set up a suplex and backbreaker for two as frustration is setting in.

It’s chair time but Shawn kicks it away and sends HHH outside. Following him isn’t the best idea in the world though as HHH rams him into the Cell and the post over and over. Back in and a side slam onto the folded chair gives HHH two so he covers several more times to no avail. A chair to the back gets the same result but Shawn is up with a hiptoss to the floor. HHH comes back in to a low blow as this is still lacking the necessary intensity.

They’re beating each other up, but it doesn’t feel nearly violent enough. An atomic drop sends HHH back to the floor and Shawn whips him into the steps, which JR says must be the cousin of the Cell. Shawn tries a piledriver on the steps (nice little callback to the first Cell match) but gets backdropped onto the floor. HHH grabs a fresh chair (because….I have no idea really) and blasts the back again. The steps come in now but Shawn hits the flying forearm and nips up.

HHH hits him with the steps anyway and that draws more blood. Well that makes it feel a little more violent. That’s not enough of a reason to lay around some more so HHH hits him a second time. Of course Michaels kicks out and more blood flows, which is made even worse as HHH takes it outside again. Shawn’s face gets raked against the Cell and the spinebuster plants him back inside. Just because we need one, HHH grabs the sleeper but gets sent into the corner.

HHH tell Shawn to counter the Pedigree into the DDT, tries the Pedigree, and gets reversed into a DDT. It’s Shawn up after the next required nap with a chair to the head to bust HHH open even worse. We haven’t had enough stuff in here yet, so let’s bring in a ladder to hit HHH in the face as well. A whip into the ladder in the corner puts HHH on the floor, this time with Shawn raking his face into the Cell. Back in and HHH gets whipped into the ladder again for two but the top rope elbow misses.

They slug it out from their knees as JR points out that this is the longest Cell match in history. Naturally they collapse, because they need a nap after being in the match so long. Back up (again) and HHH sends him shoulder first into the post, allowing him to grab a table. Shawn comes back with some slow motion punches and puts HHH on the table. The elbow off the ladder through the table gets an eventual two and they’re both down again. Sweet Chin Music is blocked by a low blow and there’s the Pedigree.

That gets two and they pull each other up in what I’m sure is some kind of symbolism, but GET ON WITH THIS ALREADY! Now Sweet Chin Music connects for another delayed two and HHH is back up with another Pedigree. No cover due to the required nap, so it’s a third Pedigree to FINALLY give HHH the pin.

Rating: C+. What’s amazing is it’s not a bad match at all. The violence is pretty good, they had a nice story with Shawn’s back (at least for the first half), and it felt like the big ending to the rivalry. The problem is you could actually cut off half of the match and still do the same thing. There is WAY too much laying around and filling in time, plus so much stuff that was just added to make the match feel big (the ladder and the table are good places to start). The length is the problem here and it’s the best example I can think of for a match that is long for the sake of being long. Now never let them fight again.

Post match they’re both dead so Evolution comes to help HHH out. JR talks this up like the greatest, most brutal match of all time, even though it’s not even the most brutal Cell match in Shawn’s career. JR: “The longest running, most storied rivalry in WWE history has ended.” You know, this feud that isn’t even two years old and, if you count Elimination Chambers and triple threats, less than ten major matches against each other. Anyway Shawn gets the big heroic stand up moment to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was another good example of how these brands aren’t really able to do stand alone shows. There was a match that took up about an hour (counting entrances, video and post match) and the World Champion had to wrestle twice. The show was long enough at around two hours and fifty minutes but look at how much time they had to fill to get there.

The show itself isn’t that bad though. The title matches (save for the women) are almost all good and the Cell is fine enough, assuming you watch it at double speed or need something to put you to sleep. That Cell match drains the energy out of the show though as it’s over a third of the entire run time. There are far worse shows (last year’s Bad Blood was a disaster) but you’re better off stopping it after about an hour and forty five minutes. Now, just keep HHH and Shawn apart for good.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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