IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 1995
Date: November 19, 1995
Location: USAir Arena, Landover, Maryland
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect, Jim Ross

Aside from the main event, there really isn’t much else to talk about. The rest of the show is dedicated to the midcard, save for the return of the Undertaker. He’ll be captaining the Dark Side to face the Royals, led by King Mabel, who helped crush Undertaker’s face a few months prior. Let’s get to it.

We start with Razor Ramon, talking about being in the first Wild Card match. The idea here was to take faces and heels and mix them up. It was an interesting concept but like most Survivor Series matches, it didn’t mean anything and wasn’t done again.

Mr. Perfect is introduced as a surprise commentator.

We actually get an opening video which is about Bret going A-Diesel hunting. The idea is old vs. new. It’s no countout and No DQ tonight, basically meaning a street fight.

BodyDonnas vs. Underdogs

BodyDonnas: Skip, Rad Radford, Tom Prichard, 1-2-3 Kid

Underdogs: Barry Horowitz, Hakushi, Marty Jannetty, Bob Holly

The idea here is people that care about their looks vs. jobbers. Horowitz scored one of the biggest upsets ever over Skip (Chris Candido, a fitness guru. He would later be joined by Prichard under the name Zip. Their manager was the famous one though: Sunny). Jannetty needs no introduction as a jobber.

The Kid is a mystery partner who is freshly heel here. By freshly I mean this is his first match as a heel. Razor comes out to go after the Kid who screwed him over on Raw on Monday. Raw is finally a big deal at this point too. Razor is Intercontinental Champion of course. Radford is Louis Spicolli in a grunge gimmick. Holly is a racecar driver and Hakushi is a Japanese wrestler with tattoos all over his torso.

Prichard and Jannetty start things off and Marty has to fight out of the heel corner. The Kid holds him there but Prichard hits Kid with a knee by mistake. The BodyDonnas huddle on the floor until it’s off to Radford vs. Marty. Radford is called a BodyDonna in training because he’s pretty fat. Here’s Holly to face Rad and he takes Radford over with a hurricanrana. Radford tries the same thing but gets powerbombed down.

Off to Hakushi who is pretty freshly face. He gets behind Radford but walks into a spinebuster. Off to the Kid who hits a top rope splash on Hakushi for two and it’s time for Captain Skip. Hakushi escapes a belly to back superplex and it’s back to Holly who speeds things up. Prichard comes in as the fans want Barry. A powerbomb counters a hurricanrana from Holly but Tom misses a moonsault. Holly hits a top rope cross body for the elimination. Skip immediately comes in and rolls up Holly to tie it back up.

Hakushi comes in again and trips up Skip before elbowing him in the face. A Vader Bomb hits knees though and Skip gets control back. A shot to the chest takes Skip down so here’s the Kid again. The fans want Barry but it’s Hakushi taking over with a Muta Elbow in the corner. A top rope shoulder takes Kid down for two but Hakushi misses a springboard splash. Razor is watching in the back. Kid kicks Hakushi in the back of the head and Radford gets the easy pin.

Barry comes in and gets pounded down and the fans almost explode. Naturally this match would be the end of his push because that’s how it works in the WWF, though I don’t think Horowitz had a long shelf life. Radford and the Kid double team Horowitz but he comes back with a jawbreaker to Rad. Skip tells Rad not to pin Barry yet because he wants to get the pin himself.

Radford hits a Hennig neck snap as Hennig is stunned at the reaction to Horowitz. Rad stops to exercise and gets cradled by Barry for the pin. It’s Skip/The Kid vs. Barry/Marty. Horowitz gets distracted by a double team and the Kid dropkicks him in the back, setting up a legdrop for the elimination. So it’s Marty down two on one but he avoids a charging Skip in the corner.

A sunset flip out of nowhere gets two for Marty and the Rocker Dropper (a fancy Fameasser) puts Skip down and Marty goes up. Sunny crotches him but Skip gets countered into a Superbomb (powerbomb off the top, which would be Skip’s finisher in ECW) for the elimination. It’s one on one now and a missile dropkick gets two for the Kid. A moonsault misses Marty though and they’re both down. Jannetty dropkicks him down for two and here comes Sid (Kid’s partner). A Rocker Dropper takes the Kid down for two but Sid guillotines Marty on the ropes and Kid steals the pin.

Rating: B. This was a good match to open things up with, especially since I don’t think anyone would have been able to buy Barry Horowitz captaining anything but an opening match team. Other than that though, the action here was good and it set the Kid up as a somewhat big time heel which is what he needed so soon after a turn. Good opener.

Razor threw a fit in the back after the loss, throwing a monitor against the wall in the process.

Three members of I guess you would say the heel Wild Card team (Dean Douglas, Owen and Yokozuna) say that Razor needs to channel his energy into their match later, since he’s their partner.

Team Bertha Faye vs. Team Alundra Blayze

Bertha Faye, Aja Kong, Tomoko Watanabe, Lioness Asuka

Alundra Blayze, Kyoko Inoue, Sakie Hasegawa, Chaparita Asari

Bertha is an overweight and not incredibly attractive woman and is Blayze’s main rival for Blayze’s Women’s Title. She tells the fans to shut up in an attempt to get people interested in this match. The rest are Japanese wrestlers who didn’t spend a lot of time in the WWF. Asari and Asuka start things off with Asuka taking her head off with a spinwheel kick. At least I think that’s what happened because we’re getting a wide shot of the arena for the opening bell. Asari, a member of the face team, stands about 4’9 and is a tiny thing whereas Asuka looks like a monster.

Off to Blayze who is more Asuka’s size for a slam on the Lioness. Back to Asari who debuts the Sky Twister Press (a corkscrew moonsault) in America. Asuka doesn’t sell it but you can’t ask everything of her. Vince has no idea what to call it but JR is there to clean up for him. Blayze comes back in and hits a German suplex to eliminate Asuka. It makes the names easier to keep track of if nothing else.

Watanabe comes in but misses a dive. Blayze sends her to the floor and does hit her dive to take over. Hasegawa comes in and hits five rolling double underhook suplexes on Watanabe as Perfect makes sexist remarks. Watanabe hits a seated senton off the top for two as this selling thing is still an issue. Aja Kong, a total monster, comes in with no tag and is immediately kicked in the face and suplexed by Hasegawa. Another Rock Bottom suplex puts her down but Hasegawa jumps into a kick to the chest. Something like a belly to back suplex eliminates Hasegawa to make it 3-3.

Asari comes in and is quickly dispatched by a middle rope splash. If you can’t see the ending of this match coming, you fail your exam. Blayze comes in but tags out almost immediately to Inoue. Inoue looks like a cross between a Rocker and the Ultimate Warrior. By the time I finish typing that, a seated senton eliminates her. Kong put out three girls in about 90 seconds.

So it’s Blayze vs. Faye, Kong and Watanabe. All three get in the ring at once but Watanabe stays in. A snap suplex gets two for the champion and a slow motion piledriver gets the pin to make it 2-1. Faye comes in and after some basic shots in the corner, gets caught in a German suplex to make it one on one. Kong hits a superplex for two and she crushes Blayze in the corner for a bit. Alundra hits a bad hurricanrana for two and a standing moonsault for the same. Blayze goes up but gets headbutted down and the spinning backfist gets the pin for Kong.

Rating: C+. The match was fun stuff considering it only had ten minutes to get through seven eliminations. Kong would have been a great challenger for Blayze, if the division had stayed around. Blayze would show up on Nitro in about a month and throw the WWF Women’s Title (and her career for the most part) in the trash. Fun match but too rushed to mean anything.

A Bill Clinton impersonator is here. He says he’s been watching Bam Bam Bigelow since Bigelow was a kid and playing with Pebbles.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Goldust

Goldust has been around about a month at this point. This is when Goldust was just a movie fanatic at this point and not, you know, trying to screw everyone on the roster. Bigelow is obsessed with fire here, which makes sense given his looks and attire. After about a four minute entrance, we’re ready to go. Then we get some stalling to go with the long entrance.

Goldust tries to get in Bigelow’s mind but gets knocked to the floor for his efforts. Back in and Bigelow slugs him down but charges into a boot in the corner. Goldust gets rammed into the post on the floor but he comes back with a clothesline to send Bigelow back to the floor. Back in and it’s a front facelock as this match keeps dragging along. Bam Bam is thrown to the floor but comes back with a clothesline. A headbutt misses and Goldust rides Bigelow on the mat. Bam Bam comes back with an electric chair but gets taken down by a lariat. Bigelow makes a comeback, misses a charge, and gets bulldogged down for the pin.

Rating: F. This was an eight minute match. Look at the length of what I wrote and tell me how this match ran eight minutes. Goldust was all mystique and no substance for a year or so until he figured out how to wrestle a match as Goldust instead of as Dustin Rhodes in a funny outfit. This was Bigelow’s last match in the company ever.

Clinton wastes more of our time but now with Bob Backlund, who isn’t a big fan.

We recap Mabel vs. Undertaker. Mabel was fat and won the King of the Ring. Then he dropped some big fat legs on Undertaker, crushing his face. Tonight it’s about revenge.

Royals vs. Dark Side

Royals: King Mabel, Jerry Lawler, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Isaac Yankem

Dark Side: Undertaker, Fatu, Henry Godwin, Savio Vega

Mabel is on a throne carried by about five guys, all of whom look like they’re about to have hernias. The idea here is you have King Mabel, King Lawler, the blue blood Helmsley, and the Royal Dentist Isaac Yankem. About two years later, Isaac would put on a mask and remember that he’s Undertaker’s brother Kane. What exactly is dark about Undertaker’s partners isn’t really clear. Fatu is MAKING A DIFFERENCE and is supposed to be some kind of hero for kids in the projects. Godwin is a hog farmer and Vega is a street fighter from Puerto Rico.

Undertaker’s entrance is as huge as you would expect it to be. He has this skull looking mask on now which would eventually be purple and look very stupid. Fatu and Hunter start things off. The Dark Side even has matching t-shirts that say Rest In Peace. Fatu throws Helmsley around to start but we almost get a Pedigree, which is only broken up by a glare from Undertaker. Off to Godwin, who was feuding with Hunter at this point in the standard culture clash feud.

Off to Lawler who immediately tags in Yankem. A big hop toss puts Isaac down but he sends Henry into the corner to escape. Back to Helmsley, which I’m getting tired of typing. If only there was a shorter version of his name. Perfect: “You know Helmsley likes to be called Triple H.” Thank you Mr. Perfect. Anyway, Godwin gorilla presses HHH, holding him up for a LONG time.

Lawler comes in and gets Savio, which is a clash of styles if I’ve ever heard of one. Vega pounds away on Jerry and Fatu does the same. Yankem gets in a knee to Fatu’s back and the evil King takes over. The smaller evil king that is. Isaac comes in to slam Fatu and a legdrop follows. Mabel comes in but misses a splash in the corner. Vega pounds on Mabel in a rematch of the KOTR final. A side slam kills Vega but there’s no cover.

Vega gets beaten on in the corner to fill in more time. Yankem is listed as 6’8 or 6’9 here, which means he would have grown about three or four inches by the time he became the Big Red Machine. A HHH knee drop gets two on Vega as the crowd is silent because none of this means anything. This is all just filler until we get to the Undertaker tag when the place is going to erupt.

Lawler’s piledriver on Vega gets two. Well it’s not Memphis so it’s understandable. Lawler knocks Vega into the corner…..and here’s Undertaker. Jerry gets thrown around by the throat and no one will tag him. Tombstone and pin on Lawler, tombstone and pin on Yankem, chokeslam and pin on Helmsley, and there’s just Mabel left. He immediately belly to belly suplexes Undertaker down and drops the face crushing legdrop before dancing a bit. There’s the situp and Mabel runs for the countout. The four eliminations took two minutes and two seconds.

Rating: D+. This whole match ran just under fifteen minutes and about two of those meant anything. Everything was waiting for Undertaker to come in and dominate, which he did quite well, but getting there was pretty dull stuff. This match is more fun for looking at what these people would become rather than what they are now. Undertaker would lose the mask soon enough thank goodness.

Bret is ready for Diesel and isn’t looking forward to the defense he’d have at the next In Your House against British Bulldog. He talks about Wayne Gretzky and wonders if he himself is still the best ever. Today he’ll find out.

Diesel isn’t worried about Bulldog and he’s going to take care of Bret tonight.

DiBiase and Cornette have a small argument before the next match. Shawn comes in and says chill.

Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna

Shawn Michaels, Ahmed Johnson, British Bulldog, Sycho Sid

Yokozuna, Owen Hart, Razor Ramon, Dean Douglas

This is the Wild Card match with all of the mixed up partners. It’s also Ahmed’s (a very large, muscular intimidating man) PPV debut. Sid is Shawn’s other former bodyguard but they split after Wrestlemania XI, turning Shawn face in the process. Douglas is the original Damien Sandow, which is a ripoff of the Genius. We get going with Owen vs. Shawn which is of course very fast paced stuff. Shawn sends him to the floor and after ducking a tennis racket shot from Cornette, taps Cornette’s pants with said racket. Back inside and it’s Douglas pounding away on Shawn and suplexing him down.

Shawn comes back with a forearm followed by a double ax off the top rope for two. Douglas misses a Vader Bomb so Shawn comes back with a moonsault press for two. It’s off to Ahmed who gets to destroy everything in sight but he can’t slam Yokozuna. After a big group beatdown, Dean is able to get a chinlock on Ahmed to take over. Razor gets in some cheap shots which is rather heelish of him.

Back to who walks into a powerslam but it’s off to Shawn, who Ahmed launches into Dean for two. In a more normal act for Razor, he pops Dean in the face to give Shawn a rollup win. Off to Bulldog vs. Owen which should be a good pairing. Owen hits a sweet spinwheel kick for two and Bulldog is so mad that he tags out to Shawn.

Hart tags out to Razor and it’s time for a rematch from Summerslam 95. JR: “I don’t think they can wrestle each other without a ladder.” They’re tentative to start things off but Shawn throws Razor to the floor, followed by Razor taking Shawn’s head off with a clothesline. They collide in mid-air but Shawn nips up. Razor is like forget that chico and hits the Razor’s Edge out of nowhere. Ahmed makes the save and the fans aren’t sure if they like that.

They collide again…..and then they do it for a third time. Shawn tags in Sid who had his back to the ring for some reason. This is a rematch from a recent Raw and part of an ongoing feud. Razor can barely get up, allowing Sid to pound away at will. Yokozuna tries to get in a cheap shot on Sid but Sid kicks him away. Razor comes back with some right hands and they clothesline each other down. That’s the fourth time something Razor has done something like that in five minutes.

For some reason, Sid goes up (well he is Sycho) and gets slammed back down for two. A one handed chokeslam (looked awesome) puts Razor down but Sid tags in Shawn instead of powerbombing him. Shawn accidentally superkicks Sid but Bulldog breaks up the pin. Not that it matters as Razor covers again a second later and gets the pin. Sid powerbombs Michaels, his own partner, before leaving. Bulldog and Razor are legal at the moment with Bulldog pounding away….or not as Bulldog was just having fun.

Razor and Shawn are both down but Ramon can only get two. Owen gets the tag to beat on Michaels and drops him with a backdrop. Off to Yokozuna for the first time and he destroys Shawn in the corner. Shawn gets whipped upside down in the corner and it’s off to the nerve hold by Yokozuna. It’s not like Yokozuna is flexing or anything but it does look like a nice shoulder to lean on I guess.

Shawn gets up and is promptly elbowed back down. Off to Owen for a double headbutt to put Shawn down again. Owen misses a swan dive and Shawn makes the tag to Ahmed, who cleans house. The yet to be named Pearl River Plunge (Tiger Bomb) pins Owen and it’s off to Razor vs. Ahmed, which would have been a very interesting feud. Razor bulldogs Johnson down and things break down again with Razor beating up all of his opponents.

Ahmed goes to the corner to pose, and he just happens to put himself in Razor’s Edge position. With Ahmed down, Bulldog comes in sans tag. Here come Sid and the 1-2-3 Kid with DiBiase as Razor hits the fall away slam on Bulldog for two. Razor drills the Kid but walks into the powerslam for the elimination. It’s Shawn/Bulldog/Johnson vs. Yokozuna now.

Shawn gets the fat man first but the right hands don’t do much to Yokozuna, who slugs Shawn down with ease. Yokozuna hits the fat man legdrop but opts for the Banzai instead of covering. Shawn, fearing death, avoids the drop and makes the tag to Ahmed. There’s the slam (for the second time) but Bulldog breaks up the pin by his own teammate. Bulldog gets dropped and Shawn superkicks Yokozuna down. A splash from Ahmed (with a SQUEAL) gets the pin and the victory.

Rating: C+. For a match with almost no point behind it and some wacky teams, this was pretty good stuff. The Shawn vs. Razor stuff was interesting as you knew they had chemistry but it was fun to see them without a gimmick. Ahmed looked good but not great here, which would be the right description of him for his entire run in the WWF. Fun match that was never tried again, which I can understand.

More Clinton stuff with Sunny sitting on his lap. Lucky guy.

Bret talks about his previous matches with Diesel, both of which rocked.

Diesel says he’s Jackknifed Bret twice but he’s not sure if he can beat him. Diesel won the first one by DQ and the second was a draw. They were both good matches so this should be good too.

Perfect picks Bret, JR picks Diesel.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Diesel

Diesel is defending and this is No DQ and no countout. Diesel immediately takes a buckle pad off, so Bret takes another one off to match him. Bret charges him into the corner and goes after the leg but Diesel pounds him over the back to take over. The champ knocks Hart to the floor and Bret is limping. Diesel follows him out and hits a HARD ax handle to put Bret down again. It’s a slow start so far but they have a lot of time.

Hart gets sent into the barricade and goes back in but he bails to the floor immediately. Back in and Diesel wins a slugout, knocking Bret to the floor with a big right hand. Diesel whips him into the steps and keeps the pace slow. A theme of the promos had been wearing Bret tiring Diesel out so there’s some good psychology going on here. Diesel puts Bret down with a hard chair shot to the back and Hart is reeling.

Back in and Diesel loads up the Jackknife but Bret keeps grabbing the leg to block it. Now he bites the champ’s hands to escape. The fans are starting to get into this too. Bret goes for the knee and the champ is in trouble. They do the same opening sequence as Bret goes for the knee again but Diesel hits him in the back. This time though, Bret gets him down and cranks on the knee. See, THAT is storytelling.

Perfect says the line that always gets on my nerves: “They’re all the same size on the mat.” JR properly says “the size and power advantage are negated on the mat.” What JR says is true: Diesel is still bigger than Bret on the mat or standing up. Anyway, Bret cannonballs down onto the knee and there’s the Figure Four. Diesel makes the rope but Bret stays on the bad leg.

Hart tries the Sharpshooter but Diesel thumbs him in the eyes before kicking him into the exposed buckle. Bret picks the leg again and wraps it around the post before tying a cord of some kind around the post. He ties the other end of the cord to Diesel’s leg, making the champion a sitting duck. Bret gets a chair but Diesel uses the free leg for a big boot. Diesel crawls for the chair but Bret gets to it first and wears out the knee with chair shots.

With the leg still attached, Bret pulls off the backbreaker. Bret takes the chair to the top but Diesel punches him down to crotch Bret. Hart gets slammed to the mat, giving Diesel the chance to untie his ankle. Diesel chokes Bret with the cord and hits the side slam for two. Diesel sends Bret chest first into the exposed corner and puts him in 619 position for the running crotch attack, but he can’t run because of the bad leg. Instead he jumps into the air and crashes down on Bret, which looks more painful than the running version.

Diesel can barely hit Snake Eyes onto a covered buckle and Bret is in trouble. He tries another one but Bret escapes and rams Diesel into the exposed buckle. A Hart Attack clothesline gets two on the champ and Bret starts his comeback. That would be his second comeback if you’re keeping track. A middle rope clothesline gets two as does a Russian legsweep. Bret clotheslines Diesel to the floor and tries a plancha but Diesel just steps to the side and lets Bret crash.

Bret starts getting back to the apron but Diesel knocks him off, and for the first time ever, through the Spanish Announce Table. They head back inside and Diesel calls for the Jackknife but Bret falls onto his face from exhaustion. Diesel picks him up to try again but BRET IS GOLDBRICKING and rolls Diesel up for the title out of nowhere in a big surprise.

Rating: A. Outstanding match here with both guys looking awesome. It takes the right kind of opponent to get a great match out of Diesel, but when you put a smaller guy like Bret or Shawn in there, the results are almost a guarantee. These two had some classics against each other and this was one of the best ones. I had a blast with this and it worked really well with Bret getting more and more violent and sadistic before faking Diesel out and using a wrestling move to win the title. That’s psychology people, and it’s great.

Diesel snaps post match and lays out Bret and some officials. Bret takes two Jackknifes and Diesel says I’M BACK to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a pleasant surprise as with 1995 you often think of something disappointing but instead this was good almost throughout. The Goldust match was terrible but other than that and arguably the Undertaker match, the rest of this is all solid to quite good stuff. Throw in a new World Champion and there’s not much you can call bad here. Very good show.

Ratings Comparison

BodyDonnas vs. Underdogs

Original: A-

Redo: B

Team Bertha Faye vs. Team Alundra Blayze

Original: D

Redo: C+

Goldust vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: C

Redo: F

Dark Side vs. Royals

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Bret Hart vs. Diesel

Original: C+

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

As close as the previous show was to being the same, this one is almost entirely different, yet it leads to a very similar overall rating. That’s a very interesting thing and one of my favorite things to see in doing this.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/14/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1995-bret-slays-the-giant/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 25, 2018
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

This show is still in a bit of a strange place as we’re less than two weeks removed from Bound For Glory, meaning there aren’t many major stories going on at the moment. There is however a World Title match tonight in the form of Fenix challenging for the World Title against Johnny Impact. That and I’m sure something else about Tommy Dreamer. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video recaps last week’s events.

Opening sequence.

Scarlett Bordeaux comes out to scout talent.

Sami Callihan vs. Trevor Lee

Sami jumps him to start as Callis drools over Scarlett (fair enough). Trevor gets sent into the ropes so Dave Crist can kick him in the back. A kick to the back of the head staggers Sami but he’s right back with a Death Valley Driver for two. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Callihan grabs a neckbreaker out of the corner. With almost everyone looking at Scarlett, she takes a walk as Trevor elbows Sami down and dives onto the Crist Brothers. Jake is up in time to shove him off the top though and the Cactus Piledriver finishes Lee at 5:50.

Rating: C-. I wouldn’t have believed it possible but Sami has completely turned around for me. When you get him away from wrestling regular matches and let him be the far more naturally violent brawler, he can be entertaining. The lack of shouting about Ohio all the time does wonders for him too.

Post match Cage comes out and wrecks OVE. Sami’s bat shot is swatted away and Cage offers him a free shot. That’s blocked as well and the Crists save Sami from the Drill Claw.

King yells about not being able to touch Konnan. He has an idea of how to get around the bosses though and the OGz are with him.

Rohit Raju helps Gama Singh warm up before their match tonight. Sweet goodness put ANYTHING ELSE on this show.

Preview for the rest of the show.

Eli Drake invades the commentary booth and threatens Callis for bringing up the lawsuit Drake is filing.

Heavenly Bodies vs. LAX

Non-title. The Bodies are Desirable Dustin and Gigolo Justin. Santana chops away at we’ll say Dustin as the match is ignored to talk about the lawsuit. Ortiz lets Santana springboard off of him for a moonsault but the Bodies come back and knock Ortiz into the corner to take over. A missed charge allows the hot tag to Santana as Drake tries to remember wrestling on a show with the Bodies.

Everything breaks down and a reverse DDT/powerbomb combination gets two on Justin but a Michinoku Driver into a top rope splash gets the same on Santana. The Bodies put Santana on top but Ortiz powerbombs one of the down, leaving Dustin to take the Street Sweeper for the pin at 5:57.

Rating: C. Totally watchable match here as the Bodies may come off like a rather old school team but if they work like this, they could be regulars around here. The tag division is almost non-existent at this point so even having an average team added to the roster would do it some good. Drake was really entertaining on commentary here, even if he talked about the match for about thirty seconds.

Tessa Blanchard comes into Taya Valkyrie’s locker room and yells at her for the things she’s been saying. Blanchard is even willing to put the title on the line next week. Taya says see you next week then.

Matt Sydal and Ethan Page come up to LAX with Sydal not liking the way he’s treating his boys. Konnan doesn’t seem to care.

Moose is ready to beat up Fallah Bahh. Killer Kross says KM and Bahh are like two dogs chasing a car. Tonight, they’re both his. Kross: “Good talk. Tick tock.”

Video on Fenix, talking about his rise in the American wrestling scene, including his time in Lucha Underground.

Rich Swann and Willie Mack are glad to be here and Mack wants him to be his opponent for his debut match next week. Swann is cool with that.

Gama Singh vs. Rohit Raju

Singh introduces himself and lists off his resume. Gama shoves him away as the fans already start chanting YOU STILL GOT IT. A rake to the eyes has Raju in trouble and Gama slaps him for good measure. Cue someone from the back for a fireman’s carry gutbuster on Raju for the DQ at 1:50.

Post match Singh and the new guy beat Raju down but they all pose together because this seems to be the new Desi Hit Squad. I’m so thrilled.

Johnny Impact praises Fenix, who he says is like family. Some families fight though and tonight they’ll fight for the World Title. May the best man win.

Scarlett is in a bath to watch fan submitted applications for her talent search. They’re as bad as you would expect.

Killer Kross/Moose vs. Fallah Bahh/KM

KM and Moose start things off with KM shouldering him down in a bit of a surprise. Some right hands keep Moose in trouble but it’s off to Kross, who is a bit more skilled on the mat. KM actually takes him down as well, allowing Bahh to hit a corner splash. Moose comes back in and puts a People’s….foot on the face for your comedy of the match. It’s back to Kross, who just gets angry at being clotheslined. The beatdown is on with Bahh in trouble, mainly due to Moose not liking having toes in his mouth.

A lot of yelling ensues, with Moose calling Bahh fat. You don’t do that to Bahh, who hammers away and hits a crossbody. Kross will have none of that and starts dropping knees on Bahh to take over. Moose slugs away and Bahh shouts a lot, setting up a belly to belly suplex to cut him down. A Samoan drop takes Kross down as well but here’s Eddie Edwards to choke Moose with a kendo stick. As they fight to the back, Kross chokes KM out at 9:23.

Rating: C-. Remember how I said the tag division was basically non-existent? That’s even more frustrating when you consider how many teams there could be at the moment. Would you be interested in seeing Kross and Moose vs. LAX in a long brawl? You even have KM and Bahh as the resident comedy goofs. There’s a division there, if it was actually put together.

Post match Moose and Eddie fight all the way up to the roof with Eddie being tossed into the wall. Eddie gets in a stick shot to save himself from flying over the edge.

Classic Clip of the Week: Samoa Joe and AJ Styles vs. Sting and Kevin Nash from Impact in 2008. It’s very nice that they’ve cut these down to short clips instead of almost full matches.

Jordynne Grace is coming.

Eddie talks to his stick when Alisha comes in, panicking over what just happened. He kisses her and says she drives him crazy before leaving.

Kiera Hogan vs. Su Yung

Kiera goes straight at her on the ramp and hits a sliding kick to the face in the corner. A hurricanrana out of the corner gives Kiera two but Yung snaps her across the top rope by the hair. Kiera gets caught in the Tree of Woe so Yung charges, only to have Kiera sit up. That’s fine with Yung, who takes her down with a neckbreaker in a sweet counter.

The Mandible Claw is loaded up but Kiera gets a powerbomb where she nearly drops Yung. They fight onto the apron but here’s Allie to save Kiera from a Panic Switch on the ramp. Allie says she can’t help Kiera now though and leaves, only to have Yung hit a hanging Pedigree. The Panic Switch finishes Hogan at 4:52.

Rating: C-. This was energetic while it lasted and I’m wondering where the Allie story is going. A lot of it is built on the return of Rosemary, which could take some time and therefore allow this story to build up properly for a change. Hogan is becoming a star by association and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Next week: LAX vs. Sydal/Page for the Tag Team Titles and Blanchard vs. Valkyrie for the Knockouts Title.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Johnny Impact vs. Fenix

Impact is defending. Feeling out process to start as they exchange a few grapples. Fenix’s big kick misses but Impact’s doesn’t, only to have them flip into a standoff. They’re certainly nailing the battle of athleticism so far. Fenix grabs a nip up but Impact nips out of it for a second standoff. Impact tries a springboard inside but Fenix dives underneath it and lands on the ramp.

They both run for the same buckle but it’s Fenix shoving Impact off, setting up a spring springboard into a spinning crossbody for two, even though he nearly overshot Impact. A Russian legsweep takes Fenix down and the Flying Chuck takes us to a break. Back with Impact putting on a crossface (with the other arm pinned down for a little change of pace) but Fenix slips out.

They lock hands and somehow manage to jump to the middle rope without breaking their grip (geez) until Fenix springboards up into a huge hurricanrana for a near fall of his own. Fans: “THIS IS IMPACT!” Yeah and that’s Fenix. A quick Spanish Fly gives Impact two of his own and he drives Fenix into the corner for some shoulders.

Fenix backflips over him into a German suplex but the running knee into the standing shooting star gives Impact two more. The Countdown to Impact misses (of course) so Impact settles for the flipping neckbreaker instead. A springboard spinning headbutt takes Johnny down for two more but it’s too early for the Black Fire Driver as Johnny reverses into a DDT. Starship Pain retains the title at 14:23.

Rating: B. It’s not great as a technical exchange but you’re missing the point here if that’s what you’re looking for. This was all about an athletic spectacle and there’s nothing wrong with that. Just let two incredibly talented guys going in there and doing cool looking stuff. What more can you want from a fun match like this?

Impact shakes his hand and leaves, allowing the OGz to run in and beat down Fenix. Pentagon makes the save.

Kross talks about being crazy and trying to make change. He leaves, revealing Impact out cold to end the show. It was this or the Tag Team Titles so I’m fine with going here.

Overall Rating: B-. You know, if you cut out a few of the really bad things, you have a heck of a show here. The Desi Hit Squad is horrible and some of the wrestling could have been a lot better but the storytelling is there and I want to see where some of this stuff goes. That’s what matters most as the wrestling can catch up later on. Good show, and I want to see more like this.

Results

Sami Callihan b. Trevor Lee – Cactus Piledriver

LAX b. Heavenly Bodies – Street Sweeper to Dustin

Rohit Raju b. Gama Singh via DQ when an unnamed man interfered

Killer Kross/Moose b. KM/Fallah Bahh – Krossjacket Choke to KM

Su Yung b. Kiera Hogan – Panic Switch

Johnny Impact b. Fenix – Starship Pain

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 12, 1993
Location: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Rob Bartlett

We’re back with the post-Wrestlemania stuff this week and that means the show almost has to be better than last time. This week’s show is headlined by Money Inc. vs. the Bushwhackers because this is one of the darkest times the show has ever seen. Hopefully it’s better this time around but I wouldn’t get my hopes up. Let’s get to it.

Money Inc. pays off the Beverly Brothers for information about the Steiner Brothers. The report: they can suplex, they’re fast and they’re strong. Oh and avoid the Frankensteiner. How did DiBiase get rich with this kind of bad investments?

Opening sequence.

IRS vs. Scott Steiner

If they’ve already changed the advertised match to something else, imagine how bad the original plans were going to be. Since it’s tax season, IRS keeps his PAY YOUR TAXES speech short this week. IRS bails straight to the ropes to get out of a hammerlock as Bartlett gets into a discussion of toothpaste being thicker than blood. A good looking powerslam plants IRS but Scott stops to yell at DiBiase and that’s enough for a breather.

Back in and Scott shoulders him down, setting up an armbar as IRS can’t keep up on the mat (Michigan beats Syracuse I guess). The announcers make tax jokes (the height of 1993 comedy) as Steiner gets two off a suplex. IRS elbows him to the floor where DiBiase gets in a clothesline as we take a break.

Back with IRS hitting a piledriver for two and the chinlock going on. And staying on for a long time actually, because that’s how you want an opener to go. IRS gets a backbreaker but takes WAY too long going up top for the jump straight into a raised boot, making it look even dumber than usual. Scott starts slugging away and even snaps IRS’ throat across the top with his tie. The tiger bomb connects but DiBiase comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. That chinlock really hurt things but the bigger problem is this match getting so much time. Their tag matches would be better but the singles matches don’t exactly have a spark. It’s almost like a wrestling tax man isn’t the kind of gimmick you want in a longer match. Just dull for the most part, which is quite a long time for a match getting this long.

Post match the Beverly Brothers come in for the double team but clothesline DiBiase by mistake. Shoving ensues and DiBiase wants his money back. Money Inc. goes to leave and gets jumped from behind. I guess this is a face turn, even though the Beverlies were leaving within a month at the most.

Tatanka vs. Von Krus

Von Krus is better known as Vito and is from just Germany. He spits at Tatanka’s feet to start so it’s a monkey flip and hiptoss to put him down. Cue Doink the Clown to spray water out of his umbrella as Tatanka gets poked in the eye. Some chops get Tatanka out of trouble and there’s the big jumping elbow. Krus hits an elbow of his own, this time to the jaw, followed by a headbutt. A backdrop gets Tatanka out of the already limited trouble and it’s off to the warpath, capped off by the Papoose To Go for the pin.

Rating: D. This was just barely a squash as Krus got in some offense to make the match go on a little longer than you would have guessed. Tatanka was still undefeated at this point and you would think that would lead somewhere at some point. It would still be a few months before that would be the case, but it wasn’t like he had the highest ceiling in the world.

Wrestlemania report, with both title changes being announced. Not the best idea in the world when you’re still selling the replay. Double Doink and Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez get some attention as well. You would think some of the actual good things would be mentioned here but that’s not the WWF style in 1993.

For reasons I don’t want to imagine, Bartlett gets to do an interview with Luna Vachon, who seems to scare the heck out of him. Ok fair enough. She’s the woman of the 90s and the true balance between genius and insanity. A few insults to Sherri bring her out for some yelling of her own. Luna says she’s a woman of the wild and promises to wipe Sherri across the ring like a fine Picasso.

The fight is on and clothes ripping ensues, including Bartlett’s, sending him running off. This goes on for a while with the fight heading into into the crowd until Sgt. Slaughter and Savage break it up. Post break, Luna comes back and loses more clothes (Savage: “OH YEAH!”). I want to see these two fight, which I never would have expected. Also, this is way further with the exposed skin than you usually get at this point.

Papa Shango vs. Scott Taylor

Fink calls him Skip for some reason. Taylor that is, not Shango. Some right hands and a dropkick just annoy Shango so he drops Taylor with a belly to back. A headbutt to the ribs keeps Taylor in trouble as Bartlett staggers back out and faints at commentary. Shango finishes with a shoulderbreaker.

Friar Ferguson vs. Chris Duffy

Yes he’s a wrestling monk who would go on to become Bastion Booger. Duffy gets shoved down to start and backdropped out of a piledriver attempt. Hold on though as Ferguson has to stop to pray. Duffy tries to slingshot him inside but gets tossed to the floor instead. Ferguson pulls up his robe to dance a bit and gets two off a splash, pulling up for some reason. A nerve hold continues this way too long squash. Back up and Duffy tries a sunset flip so Ferguson sits on his chest for the pin.

Rating: F. I know we talk about the Goon, Duke Droese and Aldo Montoya as the worst gimmicks of all time. Let me say this again though: HE’S A WRESTLING DANCING MONK! What in the world were the ideas that DIDN’T make air? This is one of those so terrible it’s forgotten ideas and you can see why.

Here are some fan interviews from Wrestlemania. The gist of it: shouting whatever country they’re from.

Money Inc. is ready for the Beverly Brothers next week so here are the Beverlies to jump them from behind to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. I still can’t get over the monk thing. They’re still in the post Wrestlemania lull, which you have to expect for a few weeks. There isn’t much going on at the moment and that’s fine considering the big stars aren’t actually back yet. However, there’s a point where you have to have something actually good on the show, but that didn’t happen here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 5, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage

It’s the night after Wrestlemania IX…and it’s a taped show from about two weeks ago. To say it’s a different time would be a huge understatement but to be fair, the show isn’t even three months old at this point so it’s not like there’s a history to go off of here. I wouldn’t expect anything special here but that’s the case with a lot of 1993. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Virgil vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

During the entrances, Savage talks about Hogan winning the title last night. So either they did commentary later or they were a lot more trustworthy with some of the results. Virgil can’t get very far with the wristlock so he dropkicks Bigelow in the forearm as the fans tell Virgil that he sucks. For some reason Virgil tries a crucifix and gets crushed with a Samoan drop to change things up in a hurry.

We hit the chinlock as Vince gets in the required laughable line that Wrestlemania IX might be the best of all time. A headbutt sets up the neck crank and then a bearhug as this isn’t exactly thrilling. Virgil finally gets out and hits a bad looking missile dropkick for two. That’s enough for Bigelow, who headbutts him down and hits the top rope headbutt for the pin.

Rating: D-. There’s not much you can do with these two and they weren’t really going as hard as they could. Virgil was one of the weakest jobbers to the stars that I can remember and considering how bad some of them were, it’s covering quite a bit of ground. Bigelow wasn’t exactly at his peak here either and it wasn’t going to get any better for awhile.

Jerry Lawler comes out for his first ever WWF match but leaves over the BURGER KING chants.

Still at the backstage set of Wrestlemania, Mr. Fuji and Yokozuna have launched an official complaint about Hogan being the champion. There was no contract and therefore, no title change. Gene Okerlund tells us all that as Fuji and Yokozuna never actually talked.

Bob Backlund vs. Kim Chee

Chee is Kamala’s handler and probably played by Steve Lombardi (Brooklyn Brawler). Backlund’s handshake is declined so he trips Kim down with next to no effort. An elbow puts Backlund down and we’re already off to the chinlock. A sunset flip gives Chee two more and we hit the chinlock. Backlund fights up without much effort and hits some hiptosses. Chee tries a monkey flip but Bob rolls him up for the fast pin.

Rating: D+. Backlund is still worth seeing for his technical prowess but I don’ think anyone was thrilled with seeing the old guy back for one more run like this. It’s just not that thrilling of a story as the character is hardly interesting, which is kind of the point. At least they kept it short, which is a common ting to say around this era.

Damien Demento vs. Jim Brunzell

Regular commentator Rob Bartlett calls in, saying that he’s wasted all of his money at the tables in Las Vegas and can’t get back to work. He begs Vince for money but Vince can’t hear him in an unfunny bit. Why this is happening during a match isn’t clear, but why Demento was a thing isn’t either. Bartlett asks Vince to send him some money or a ticket as the “connection gets worse and worse”. So that wasn’t funny.

Brunzell works on the arm for a bit and Demento is annoyed that he has to grab the rope for the break. Brunzell gets two off a sunset flip as Vince hypes up the Wrestlemania replay. I didn’t want to see it in the first place. The announcers debate whether or not Hulk Hogan is a legitimate World Champion after last night as Demento hits him in the throat. Brunzell gets in his big dropkick for a bad looking two but gets caught in a neckbreaker. A knee drop of all things finishes Brunzell.

Rating: D-. The match was just a backdrop for the announcers talking about whatever they could come up with at the moment. That’s rarely a good idea and that’s a problem that kept happening around this time. Bartlett’s joke was funny for all of five seconds and then just got annoying, much like most of the stuff they had him doing.

Lawler comes out for the match again but still doesn’t like the Burger King chants and walks out a second time.

Steiner Brothers vs. Beverly Brothers

I didn’t realize the Beverlies were still around at this point. Scott takes Beau down without any effort but Beau complains of a hair pull to get out. Beau’s second attempt goes a bit better as he slams Scott’s head into the mat, only to get caught in a butterfly suplex. Well you knew that was coming. Blake and Rick come in with the former hitting a pretty nice powerslam. It’s back to Scott, who gets kneed in the back, allowing Beau to jump over Blake’s back and land on Scott (ala the World’s Greatest Tag Team).

A backbreaker gets two and we take a break. Back with Scott fighting out of a reverse chinlock, meaning we might have missed five seconds. Scott gets choked in the corner as the fans don’t seem thrilled with what they’re seeing. Beau puts on a bearhug until Scott muscles him over with a suplex. A missed legdrop and a tilt-a-whirl slam are enough for the hot tag to Rick so house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down and Scott hits a quick Frankensteiner for the pin.

Rating: D+. Pretty much a long beatdown on Scott until we got to the obvious ending. The Steiners were going to be the biggest stars in the division in no time because the division was so horrible at this point. The Beverlies are still fine for some low level jobbers, though they would be done in less than a month. Not terrible, but longer than it needed to be.

Watch WWF Mania! I always did.

Jim Powers vs. Jerry Lawler

Powers (a good 50lbs of muscle lighter than his Young Stallions or WCW days) punches him from behind to start and we’re off in a hurry. A top rope shot to the head lets Lawler do his great selling and a clothesline sends him scurrying out to the floor. Back in and Lawler gets slammed so he bails to the floor again. That means a lot of stalling, as you would expect from a Memphis legend.

Back in again and Lawler stalls even more, only to get annoyed at the BURGER KING chants. Powers misses a dropkick though and Lawler wants him to kiss his feet. Lawler starts choking and drops the fist but stops to yell at Savage. A raised boot in the corner gets Powers out of trouble and he sends Lawler into the corner a few times. Lawler has finally had it and hits the piledriver for the pin (with trunks because Lawler of course).

Rating: D. Boring match of course but Lawler deserves the chance to get to show just how awesome he was. Look at how little he did here but how much the fans were chanting at him. How much do you see people do today for almost no reaction? It’s because you can get so much more out of so little if you know what you’re doing.

Post break Lawler comes over to commentary and mocks the fans for yelling at him before calling out Savage as a coward. Savage stands up and Lawler bails to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. This was about as bad as it could get with nothing resembling a good match and no storyline advancement from Wrestlemania. Odds are that comes next week, but it doesn’t exactly thrill the fans who were watching this show. They were still very new to the Raw concept so it’s a bit more excusable, but sweet goodness what a weak night.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 1994
Date: November 23, 1994
Location: Freeman Coliseum, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Gorilla Monsoon

Things weren’t all that great for the WWF at this time but Bret was doing well enough as the top man. However, they still needed someone new to come along and supplement him. That name would come soon, but for now it’s still Bret defending the championship against a guy who wasn’t very interesting in the eyes of a lot of younger fans. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from earlier today of the team captains giving their teams pep talks.

Gorilla and Vince are dressed as cowboys. Gorilla looks like he could almost pull the look off but Vince looks like a schnook.

Teamsters vs. Bad Guys

Teamsters: Diesel, Shawn Michaels, Owen Hart, Jim Neidhart, Jeff Jarrett

Bad Guys: Razor Ramon, 1-2-3 Kid, British Bulldog, Headshrinkers

Diesel and Shawn are Tag Team Champions but they’ve having issues. Owen and Neidhart are a semi-regular tag team. This version of the Headshrinkers is Fatu and Sione, more famous as the Barbarian. Razor is Intercontinental Champion as is his custom. Shawn keeps slipping in front of Diesel to steal the spotlight. That’ll become important later.

It takes a while to decide who starts before we get Kid vs. Owen. This should be good. Before there’s any contact it’s off to Neidhart which won’t be as interesting. Neidhart hits a shoulder block to start but gets dropkicked down. Another shoulder gives Neidhart control though and it’s off to Jarrett. Things speed up a bit and Jarrett loses the advantage Neidhart got him.

Off to Sione, who is someone I’ve talked about before but I’ll do it again here. This guy continuously had work for nearly fifteen years, which is impressive when you consider how basic the main character he played was. The guy was always around though other than in the dying days of WCW. Anyway here he gets dropkicked in the back but powers out of the cover with ease.

Off to Owen who wants the Bulldog. Davey comes in to a big ovation and they trade insane counters to wristlocks. Owen gets catapulted into the good guy corner, which is actually the Bad Guy corner, but the Bad Guys are the good guys in the match if that makes sense. Bulldog gets kicked in the face by Hart and it’s off to Neidhart for a double clothesline. Then Bulldog hits a double clothesline on Hart and Jim, followed by the delayed vertical on Neidhart.

Fatu hits a top rope headbutt for no cover. Instead he tries to take his own boot off because he’s used to wrestling barefoot. Jarrett comes in and is immediately powerslammed before it’s off to Razor. Jeff immediately bails and it’s Razor vs….Jarrett still. Double J takes Razor to the mat and MESSES WITH HIS HAIR! Oh he’s so EVIL! A big right hand by Razor staggers Jeff and a clothesline puts him on the floor. This is a very hot crowd so far.

Back in and Jarrett escapes an atomic drop and punches Razor in the face to get himself in even more trouble. Off to the Kid who Razor gives a fall away slam to send him straight into Jeff in a cool move. Jeff hooks an abdominal stretch with some cheating from Shawn. That eventually gets caught and the Kid hooks a stretch of his own which doesn’t last long. Off to Fatu vs. Owen but all of the Canadian offense results in Samoan dancing.

A blind tag is made to Diesel and it’s a clothesline and a Jackknife to take out Fatu. Kid runs in and hits a dropkick but a top rope sunset flip is easily countered into a chokebomb. Jackknife finishes Kid a second later. Here’s Sione to pound away but he can only stagger the big man. ANOTHER Jackknife makes it 5-2. Diesel put out three guys in 70 seconds. Bulldog comes in and pounds away but a big boot puts Smith on the floor where he brawls with Owen to a countout.

So it’s Ramon vs. all five guys and he starts with Diesel. A discus punch puts Diesel down as does a middle rope bulldog. Diesel gets a clothesline in to take Razor down and Shawn screams for a Jackknife. The future Outsiders slug it out but Diesel drops him on the buckle in a snake eyes. Ramon comes back with a slam and calls for the Edge but Diesel easily backdrops him down. A big boot puts Razor down and there’s the Jackknife.

NOW Shawn wants in but he asks Diesel to hold Razor. Those of you paying attention should know what’s coming, and there it is as Shawn superkicks Diesel by mistake. This has happened a few times before and Diesel is MAD. Diesel destroys the rest of his team and stalks Shawn up the aisle. Ramon is the only one left in the ring and somehow the countout eliminates EVERYONE on the Teamsters to make Razor the sole survivor.

Rating: C. This was all angle and not much wrestling. This was the big face turn for Diesel which would result in the World Title very soon after this. It was a face turn that made sense too as he was tired of Shawn telling him what to do and getting hurt as a result, so he gave up and went after Shawn. Ticked off giants are very fun, so the first few months of Diesel Power were fun stuff. It was the other eight or nine months that stopped being fun.

Shawn leaves in the back and says Diesel is nothing without him. Diesel is on his way to Shawn’s car. Shawn speeds away, which would actually dissolve the team and vacate the Tag Team Titles in the process.

Royal Family vs. Clowns R Us

Royal Family: Jerry Lawler, Queasy, Sleazy, Cheesy

Clowns R Us: Doink, Dink, Wink, Pink

We’ve got midgets. Great. In case you can’t tell, they’re three small Lawlers and three small clowns. Lawler tells the fans to NOT chant Burger King at him, because he’s a master at baiting a crowd you know. The big guys start and guess what the fans are chanting. Here’s the first ten minutes of the match: Lawler and Doink do something, Jerry takes over, the small clowns interfere and Lawler gets mad and loses the advantage.

Lawler tries an enziguri but Doink ducks to send Jerry hiding in his corner. Jerry yells at his partners and the Clowns are all laying on the ropes. Jerry gets Doink down and has the small Lawlers run over him. They make faces at the clowns then run back over Doink and crash in a pile. Keep I mind that these other kings have facial and chest hair. Jerry yells at them again and it’s back to the big guys fighting some more.

The small clowns all come in and cover Jerry with Doink counting. Lawler is all ticked off so they do the EXACT SAME SEQUENCE with Jerry counting Doink’s shoulders. Jerry can’t catch Cheesy when Doink kicks him off so Cheesy gets a two count on Lawler with Dink counting. Doink puts a Burger King crown on Lawler to make him even madder. Dink gets on Doink’s shoulders and (this isn’t a typo) Jerry gets on Sleazy’s shoulders which goes as well as you would expect it to.

The big guys have a test of strength and it turns into a big crisscross between the little guys. Lawler gets a non-existent foreign object to take over but it’s time for a chase scene! Jerry reverses a cross body and rolls up Doink with a handful of tights to eliminate the big guy. Lawler isn’t allowed to be in the ring with one of the smaller guys so the match is in essence over already.

It’s Queasy vs. Dink to start the second half of the match and Dink gets his arm bitten. Queasy gets his tights bitten as does Lawler. Now it’s Cheesy vs. Wink with Wink pulling on the beard. Lawler blocks a monkey flip and Cheesy pins Wink off a rollup. A minute later, Lawler drops Cheesy on Pink from six feet in the air for the pin and it’s Dink vs. all four of them. Pink hides under the ring instead of leaving as Dink beats up all three little guys. A top rope cross body looks to pin Cheesy but Lawler makes the save. Sleazy gets the easy pin to win it.

Rating: S. As in stupider, which I now am having watched this. Last year’s show at least had full sized people in there having these matches and it only ran ten minutes. This ran SIXTEEN MINUTES and wasted Jerry freaking Lawler on it. I’ll take ANYTHING after this and like it more than this.

Jerry says he won the match and not the other ones. They celebrate anyway and Lawler keeps yelling, so they turn on him and the clowns join in for a six on one beatdown. The big payoff is Doink hitting Lawler with a pie. This ran nearly TWENTY MINUTES out of a two hour and forty minute show.

We get clips of Alundra Blayze vs. Bull Nakano in Tokyo with Nakano winning the Women’s Title in front of 45,000 people. I’ve never seen it but I’ve heard that match was awesome. Nakano comes in and speaks some Japanese. Todd (Petingill, this generation’s Josh Matthews/Matt Striker) does the stupid thing where he speaks loudly because all foreigners are apparently deaf.

WWF World Title: Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart

Bret is defending and this is a submission match. This is a special kind of submission match though as both guys have seconds and you have to throw in the towel to end the match. Bret has British Bulldog and Backlund has Owen Hart. Backlund was making a comeback in his 40s and was a plucky face before going completely insane and claiming that he was still champion from when his reign ended in 1983 because his manager threw in the towel and he never gave up. Bret and Owen’s parents are in the crowd. Remember that.

Backlund charges at Bret but gets hipblocked down a few times. Bret headbutts him to the floor and elbowed upon return. Hart hits something like an elevated bulldog (think Orton’s hanging DDT) to take over on the mat. Off to a chinlock which evolves into a headlock. Gorilla talks about how Bulldog beat Bret for the Intercontinental Title in 1992 to try to draw in some tension. Backlund tries to take him to the mat but Bret puts the headlock back on. Bob tries to get the chickenwing on but Bret suplexes him down.

Sharpshooter doesn’t work so Bret goes with a front facelock instead. Off to an abdominal stretch by the Hitman but Bob escapes and goes after the left arm. The chickenwing is escaped again (Backlund’s finisher is a Cross Face Chickenwing) so Bob bends the arm around the ropes. Off to an armbar on the mat but Bret nips up. Backlund drills Bret to the floor but Hart gets the advantage out there.

Back in and Backlund puts the arm on as the fans all chant LET’S GO BRET. The armbar stays on for a good while (as in like five minutes) before Bret escapes with an atomic drop. Bret can’t get the Sharpshooter but he settles for the Figure Four. This hold stays on for a while also and Bob gives up but Owen has to throw in the towel. Backlund tells Owen to throw it in but Owen won’t do it.

Backlund finally turns it over and Owen tells Bulldog to throw it in. Bret reverses it back but Backlund gets to a rope. Bret stays on the leg but can’t get the Sharpshooter. Backlund grabs a piledriver out of nowhere and momentum shifts again. Bob goes for the chickenwing but Bret gets to the ropes. We’re about twenty minutes into this and it feels like about half of that. The fans are still WAY behind Bret here which is a good sign.

Back to the arm but Backlund misses a charge and goes shoulder first into the post. Bret blocks another piledriver attempt but hooks a sleeper, which is broken pretty fast because it’s not really a submission move. They hit head to head and both guys go down. For a guy who was about 45 at this point, Backlund has looked great. Now Bret piledrives Bob and hits a bulldog to take over.

The Five Moves Of Doom culminate with the Sharpshooter but Owen runs in to deck his brother and break up the hold. Now we get to the turning point of the match as Davey charges at Owen but misses and rams his own head into the steps. He’s out cold and there’s no one to throw in Bret’s towel. Owen panics and the distraction lets Backlund put on the full chickenwing even though Bret had his hand on the rope at the beginning of the hold and a rope break was used earlier in the match but I digress.

Backlund has the hold on in the middle of the ring as Owen begins to get concerned about Bret. He says he’s sorry and Backlund takes Bret down to the mat with the hold. Smith still hasn’t moved and Bret is trying to fight up. Bret gets to his feet but can’t get the rope as Backlund pulls him down and puts on the bodyscissors along with the hold. Owen starts crying, which Vince declares the TRUE Owen.

Vince says you can lose if you say you quit, which goes against what we saw earlier with Backlund but it’s the WWF so you can’t count on continuity. We go split screen to look at Bret’s parents as Bret has been in this hold for over four minutes. Owen goes over to plead to his mom (not Stu because Stu is smarter than this) as Bret is in agony. Bret taps but that doesn’t mean anything yet. The hold has now been on for six straight minutes and the fans are still behind Bret. The maniacal look on Bob’s face as he pulls on the arm is great.

Owen begs his mom for help again and opens the barricade to bring his parents to ringside. Stu still doesn’t seem to buy anything Owen is saying. Owen picks up Bret’s towel and says for Helen to throw it in but Stu says no way. Owen gets the fans to cheer for Helen to throw in the towel and after nine and a half minutes in the hold, Helen takes the towel from Stu and throws it in, giving Backlund the title and STUNNING the fans. Owen throws his arms in the air and celebrates, sprinting to the back in triumph, because it was a SWERVE.

Rating: A. This match definitely isn’t for everyone, but if you’re a fan of old school matches and psychology, you’re going to love this. The whole thing is an intricate story with the execution being done perfectly (or with excellence if you like plays on catchphrases). Bret and Backlund are both master technicians so the in ring stuff is as close to flawless as you’re going to get. The stuff with Owen is great too and the whole match is almost perfect. It runs about thirty five minutes though and if you’re not a fan of mat stuff and building to a big finish, you’re going to hate this.

One other thing: I’d like to point out that Davey Boy Smith has been out cold for almost eleven minutes now, hasn’t moved an inch, and is likely clinically dead yet hasn’t received any attention at all. Owen stepped over him about four times in the whole sequence.

Backlund’s face as he’s awarded the title is amazing as he looks somewhat demented which pointing at himself. This is one of those moments where you look at the card on paper and say “well of course Bret retains. There’s no way they would make Backlund champion.” And then they DID and it was a legit shock. Backlund looks maniacal and the image of a plain guy in blue trunks being champion is kind of awesome as he’s all dangerous while looking nuts.

Owen celebrates in the back and cuts a great evil promo talking about how he’s the real king now and Bret is a nobody. This was the culmination of an incredible feud that ran for about a year.

Million Dollar Team vs. Guts And Glory

Million Dollar Team: Tatanka, King King Bundy, Bam Bam Bigelow, Heavenly Bodies

Guts and Glory: Lex Luger, Adam Bomb, Mabel, Smoking Gunns

This is DiBiase’s team (DiBiase had hurt his neck and had to retire) vs. Luger in a continuation of a long feud. DiBiase had said that Luger had sold out and Tatanka, Luger’s friend, believed DiBiase. This led to a match at Summerslam where it turned out that TATANKA had been bought off in a swerve I liked a lot. This is Luger’s chance for revenge again. The Gunns are a pair of cowboys named Billy and Bart.

Luger and Tatanka start things off, much to Tatanka’s surprise. Tatanka takes over to start and chops away but the ones to the chest don’t work on Luger. Lex no sells a suplex and pounds away with all his usual stuff. A clothesline puts Tatanka on the floor so here’s Del Ray to get beaten up too. Mabel and Bundy come in but it’s just a staredown as it’s back to the starters. Now it’s officially Mabel vs. Prichard with the big man missing an elbow. Prichard pounds away but a middle rope cross body to the 500lb Mable goes badly with the splash crushing Prichard for the pin.

It’s 5-4 now and Del Ray comes in for some dropkicks and no effect. A Boss Man Slam takes Jimmy down so it’s off to Bundy vs. Mabel. They collide a few times until Mabel runs him over. Off to Bigelow who gets beaten down and Mabel goes up, only to get slammed down in a cool visual. Bigelow goes up for a sunset flip but Mabel sits on his chest for no cover. A Cactus Clothesline sends them both to the floor and Mabel can’t beat the count back in to tie things up.

Off to Billy Gunn vs. Del Ray which goes nowhere so here’s Bomb vs. Bigelow. This takes about 30 seconds with Bomb hitting a slingshot clothesline but getting hit in the head by Bundy. A moonsault from Bigelow takes Bomb out and it’s 4-3. Luger comes in immediately and tries a rollup but it just gets two. Off to Del Ray who hits a fast superkick to take Lex down. After some right hands from Jimmy, a running forearm smash catches him in the head and Luger ties it up.

It’s Tatanka/Bigelow/Bundy vs. Luger/Smoking Gunns. We start with Bart vs. Tatanka before Billy comes in for a double Russian legsweep for two. The Gunns pound away on Tatanka for a little while with Bart and his mullet of death hitting a monkey flip for two. The Sidewinder (side slam from Bart with a legdrop from Billy) gets two and it’s back to Bart who apparently doesn’t think well on his feet, as he tries a crucifix on a guy whose finisher is a Samoan drop. Later Bart and it’s 3-2.

Billy vs. Tatanka goes nowhere so it’s back to Luger. Billy comes in and hip tosses Tatanka for two and an elbow drop gets the same. Luger and Gunn take turns on Tatanka’s arm until Billy gets caught in a powerslam. Off to Bundy who hits a splash and elbow to get us down to Luger vs. Bigelow, Bundy and Tatanka. It’s Luger vs. King Kong now but Lex goes after Tatanka because he’s not that bright at times.

Luger gets caught in the evil corner and we play the numbers game for awhile. Luger hits a forearm to Tatanka but only gets two. A sunset flip almost gets a pin on Tatanka but a tag was made on the way down to bring in Bigelow. Bundy drops an elbow for two and Lex is in trouble. Bigelow drops a headbutt for a VERY fast two. DiBiase talks trash as it’s off to Bundy for more fat man offense.

Bundy drops an elbow for two as we’re reenacting the main event of the first Survivor Series, complete with two of the original people in it. Back to Tatanka who gets two off a powerslam and drops a bunch of elbows. In a stupid looking yet still good ending, Luger gets a fast small package for the pin on Tatanka, then lays down on the mat so Bundy can splash him for the final elimination. That looked stupid.

Rating: C. This wasn’t that bad actually and the ending was a nice surprise. There was no reason to have Luger make the superhero comeback here and having him lose was the right move. The feud didn’t really go anywhere after this and was more or less the ending of it. Luger’s collapse after Summerslam 1993 is a sight to see given how hot he was during the summer after his face turn.

A group beatdown on Lex follows the match. The Gunns and Bomb make the save.

Backlund has a press conference and says he’s going to homogenize and synchronize the fans. It’s time for Sports Education and he’s been champion for sixteen years now. I love this character, which is a shame because he would lose the title to Diesel less than a week later in eight seconds.

Here’s Chuck Norris to be guest referee for the main event.

Quick recap before we get to casket match. This is a rematch of a casket match at the Royal Rumble (don’t get me started on that mess) where about ten guys came out to help Yokozuna beat Undertaker. Norris is here to stop interference.

Yokozuna vs. Undertaker

This is a casket match where you have to throw your opponent in the casket and close it to win. Druids bring out the casket of course. Yoko is so fat here it’s unreal. Undertaker does the throat slit from across the ring and Yokozuna falls down. A splash in the corner is no sold by Undertaker but the fat man stops before he gets thrown to the casket. Yokozuna winds up on top of the casket to further freak him out.

They fight to the floor with Undertaker in control. Back inside Old School staggers Yokozuna but he catches Undertaker in a Samoan Drop. Undertaker doesn’t sell it but the move did hit. A headbutt puts Undertaker down but he won’t go in the casket. Back in and Undertaker misses an elbow but sits up anyway. A Rock Bottom puts Undertaker down and Yokozuna drops a leg while he’s sitting up to keep the Dead Man down.

Undertaker gets put in the casket but he blocks it from being closed. They both wind up in the box and slug it out but Mr. Fuji pulls Undertaker’s hair to break things up. Cornette (Yokozuna’s other manager) gets drilled as well and we head back inside. Yokozuna sends him back to the floor and rams Undertaker into the steps (from inside the ring, which is kind of impressive). Back inside and they slug it out with Undertaker slamming the fat man’s head into the mat.

Undertaker goes up and hits a top rope clothesline to put Yokozuna down. As he’s rolling the bigger man over, here’s King Kong Bundy to glare at Norris. Bigelow comes out as well but nothing comes of it. Nothing comes of it on their end at least as IRS comes in and beats up Undertaker, which would also set up the Undertaker vs. DiBiase’s Corporation feud for 1995. Undertaker gets put in the casket but by the time Yoko gets there he can’t close the lid. Jeff Jarrett comes out to challenge Norris and gets kicked in the chest. Undertaker hits a DDT and a big boot to send Yokozuna into the casket for the win.

Rating: D. This was really dull stuff and the ending was never in doubt. Yokozuna was worthless at this point as he was too fat to move. This was the last we would see of him until Wrestlemania where he came back EVEN BIGGER. Norris didn’t really add much here but the fans liked him and that’s all that really matters. Thankfully this feud ended here.

Overall Rating: C-. This isn’t a terrible show but there are some bad parts to it. The interesting thing is that in a lot of parts, this is a sequel of last year’s show. Last year we heard rumblings of Shawn being the REAL Intercontinental Champion and he was facing Razor here, Undertaker vs. Yokozuna is a direct continuation, and Bret vs. Owen started at the 93 show and it’s almost over here (they would interact at the Rumble and have one big blowoff match after that). Anyway, this isn’t bad but a lot of people would be bored by the title match, which is understandable. Not a great show but it’s watchable, except for the clowns.

Ratings Comparison

Teamsters vs. Bad Guys

Original: C-

Redo: C

Royal Family vs. Clowns R Us

Original: G (as in below an F)

Redo: S

Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart

Original: A

Redo: A

Million Dollar Team vs. Guts and Glory

Original: C-

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Yokozuna

Original: D+

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: C-

That’s probably as close as any of these second looks are going to go.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/13/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-mr-bob-backlund-and-chuck-norris/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Mae Young Classic
Date: October 24, 2018
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Renee Young, Beth Phoenix, Michael Cole

It’s the final show as we’re up to the semifinals with four competitors left. This week we’ll have two big matches with Toni Storm facing Meiko Satomura and Rhea Ripley vs. Io Shirai. I’m not sure which of these two will be better, but either match could wind up being a heck of a showcase.  The winners move on to Evolution for the finals. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Both matches are semifinal matches.

We open with a recap of how the final four got here. Nox’s injury is still hard to watch.

Opening sequence.

Toni Storm knows Meiko Satomura is the best in the tournament and that she’ll need to wrestle her best match to win.

Satomura says they’ve fought before in Japan but it ended in a draw. She’s here to make the finals and nothing else is acceptable.

Meiko Satomura vs. Toni Storm

The fans are split, as you probably guessed. Toni’s wristlock doesn’t work to start so Satomura takes her down with a headlock. That’s reversed into another headlock but Satomura gets on top to put Storm in trouble again. The first few kicks wake Storm up a bit and a shoulder block has no effect either way. Storm is tired of this even stuff and kicks her hard in the chest for two. A few more shots keep Meiko in trouble and Storm goes back to the arm, only to get the tar kicked out of her.

Kicks to the chest and legs have Storm down and Meiko cranks on the leg in something like a seated reverse figure four. A rope is finally grabbed and Toni elbows her way out of a suplex. Meiko spinwheel kicks her down and the fans are right behind Satomura again. Toni grabs an STF and it takes a good while for Meiko to make it to the ropes. A good fisherman’s suplex gets two on Satomura and Toni knocks her to the floor for a big suicide dive.

Back in Toni kicks her in the face, only to be screamed at for her efforts. They trade kicks until Satomura plants her with a DDT. The Death Valley Driver gets two on Storm but Toni hits a hard German suplex. Storm Zero only gets two but Meiko blocks another and hits a Pele kick to the head. The step up Scorpion kick knocks Toni silly….for two. The fans were buying that as the finish and you can hear them being surprised by the kickout. Storm has had it though and hits a last gasp Storm Zero for the pin and the spot in the finals at 13:06.

Rating: B+. It took some time to get there but they were rocking at the end. I’m not sure what to think of the pick, as Satomura was clearly the top star in the tournament (at least in the fans’ eyes) but Storm is the kind of prospect that you have to push to the moon. You could have gone either way here and been right, but egads the kickout on that Scorpion kick was hard to ignore.

They both cry on the announcement as Meiko gets a LOUD thank you chant. Of course they hug, as they should. Kairi Sane comes in to present Storm with roses as HHH is on the stage to bow to Meiko. Storm can barely speak and can barely believe that she just won that match. She’s living her dream and thanks everyone for working so hard to get here.

Io Shirai is a high flier and wants to prove that she’s the best in the world.

Rhea Ripley is out to win and nothing more. She’s destroyed everyone and she’ll go it to Shirai as well.

Rhea Ripley vs. Io Shirai

Rhea doesn’t care for the respect part and shoves Shirai down to start. Shirai cartwheels into a backflip into a dropkick but Rhea faceplants her (looked like a backdrop that didn’t rotate enough) for two. We hit the seated abdominal stretch (Or is it an armbar?) to hold Shirai in place until she kicks her way out. That earns her a hard kick in the back as Ripley has been in control for most of the start.

Now it’s a seated abdominal stretch but Shirai fights up again, only to get pummeled with right hands. We hit a bodyscissors to keep Shirai down and a dropkick (again, impressive looking given the size discrepancy) gives Ripley two. A delayed vertical suplex gets two more and it’s back to the bodyscissors. Shirai turns over this time and forearms away, finally getting free.

Ripley is on her back but still rolls over and kicks Shirai in the ribs in a smart move. A pop up powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana and Ripley bails outside for a breather. That means the big suicide dive and they’re both down on the ramp. Ripley gets back in and Shirai dives back in at nine, only to be pummeled by Ripley all over again. Rhea shouts that Shirai thinks she deserves it but can’t hit a suplex.

Instead Shirai scores with some palm strikes, followed by a 619. A missile dropkick gets two but Shirai gets caught on top, meaning a top rope superplex for a heck of a crash. Riptide is broken up though and Ripley is sent shoulder first into the ropes. That means a Meteora and the moonsault finally hits properly (with Cole calling it an Asai moonsault because he has to get something wrong) for the pin on Ripley at 12:53.

Rating: B. I can’t say I’m surprised here as Shirai has been treated as the mega star of the whole thing for the entire tournament. That being said though, she hasn’t been the most thrilling person in the world. The moonsault finally hit but the rest of her offense hasn’t been anything special. Ripley has grown up a lot in the last year but needs a lot of experience. To be fair though, she turned twenty two years old earlier this month. How much experience can she have?

HHH posts with Rhea on the stage while Kairi presents Shirai with the roses. Shirai shouts about being #1.

The announcers make their picks with Storm winning the vote 2-1.

Sane, HHH, Sara Amato, Storm and Shirai pose on stage to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. This was one of those shows where you knew it would be good and then it was. The wrestling in both matches was very good and I’m looking forward to seeing the finals. It might have been nice to have a heel in the match, but it’s not like you can have Shirai lose before the finals, if at all. Very good show here, and a great tournament throughout.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Mixed Match Challenge
Date: October 23, 2018
Location: Prudential Center, Newark, New Jersey
Commentators: Renee Young, Michael Cole, Vic Joseph

So who dances this week? The dances in the middle of the matches have become a hallmark of this show and I’m not sure what that means for the series. You can probably guess the finals from here, and that doesn’t make for the most thrilling series. I know the dancing is stupid, but really, what else do they have to do? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Raw Division: Natalya/Bobby Roode (0-2) vs. Finn Balor/Bayley (1-1)

Natalya is in a Roode robe. The men start things off and let’s exchange jackets/robes. They even exchange poses but Balor tries a Glorious DDT. Roode backs off…and can’t get out of the jacket so let’s try the women instead. They hit the mat with headlock takeovers and headscissors counters, followed by an exchange of wristlocks.

Natalya flips out of a headscissors and it’s a standoff. Neither finisher works and it’s Bayley bailing to the floor. For some reason Natalya tags Roode so Balor dropkicks him in the back to take over. Roode sends him chest first into the corner and let’s look at Jimmy Uso and Naomi warming up.

Balor scores with a Sling Blade and something like the Eye of the Hurricane gets two, drawing in Natalya for the save. Bayley comes in as well but the big hug (copyright Best Friends) is broken up by Natalya. A spinebuster gives Roode two and for some reason he goes up for the Coup de Grace. Of course that doesn’t work, allowing Balor to dropkick him into the corner and hit the real version for the pin at 8:13.

Rating: D. These things are losing their steam and this was a great example. I know Roode and Natalya are a thrown together team due to Owens’ injury (though Owens wasn’t exactly a great partner for her in the first place) but they’re just not fun to watch. The stealing of finishers and poses wasn’t exactly charming and this was probably the weakest match of the tournament so far.

Ember Moon and Braun Strowman are ready to destroy Jinder Mahal and Alicia Fox.

Mahal and Fox promise to shock the world and say shanti a lot.

Smackdown Division: The Miz/Asuka (2-0) vs. Jimmy Uso/Naomi (1-1)

Asuka seems rather impressed by Naomi’s entrance. She’s fine enough to headlock Naomi down but they both try hip attacks. That goes nowhere so they giggle and hug, much to Miz’s annoyance. Therefore, it’s time for an exchange of hugs with Jimmy joining in. Miz bails to the floor to avoid the threat of a hug so Jimmy throws him back inside for a bearhug.

A missed charge lets Jimmy go up top, only to get crotched down in a hurry. After a look at Rusev and Lana in the locker room, Jimmy fights out of a chinlock and drops Miz again, allowing for the tag off to the women. Asuka gets kicked down but the split legged moonsault misses. The Samoan drop puts Miz down and stereo hip attacks in the corner have Miz and Asuka in trouble. Naomi mostly misses a dive and the thud allows Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale to finish Jimmy at 7:24.

Rating: D+. This was better than the first match but it’s still not much to see. Was anyone buying Jimmy and Naomi as a threat here? That’s the problem with so much of this: AJ and Charlotte are the only real threat to Miz and Asuka and we’re not likely to see that match until the final week. Also, the hugging was pretty much the same thing as the dancing, which comes off as putting a coat of paint on something that wasn’t great in the first place.

Asuka doesn’t look happy with Miz for beating up her friend’s husband.

Rusev and Lana make fun of AJ Styles and Charlotte.

Styles and Charlotte stretch a lot with AJ not being able to do the splits like her.

Overall Rating: D. This show is rapidly losing steam and that’s not a good sign with so many weeks left to go. The wrestling isn’t interesting and the same gags over and over again isn’t doing that any favors. That’s not a good sign when there were some of the bigger names in the competition involved here, but at least the show isn’t that long. I’m running out of ways to say that’s the best part of the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 24, 2004
Location: Metro Centre, Rockford, Illinois
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re coming up on Bad Blood and we now have a World Title match. Last week saw Kane win a battle royal to become the new #1 contender to Chris Benoit’s World Title, but you know full well that won’t be the show’s biggest match. In the same battle royal, Shawn Michaels interfered to cost HHH his title shot. I think you know where this is going. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of everything I just said.

Eric Bischoff is in HHH’s locker room where HHH demands that Shawn be reinstated. Bischoff has already done that and announces the match between HHH and Shawn at Bad Blood. That’s fine with Shawn, who can have anything he wants. Bischoff leaves and HHH yells at Evolution, saying he wants some unity tonight.

Ric Flair vs. Edge

Orton is here with Flair, who starts with some strutting. They take turns hitting each other in the corner until Edge takes over with a backdrop. Flair gets sent to the floor and begs off back inside, only to get clotheslined down. Some right hands take Edge down and the knee drop gets two. Edge is right back up with some shots to the jaw and another backdrop but Flair pokes the eye. Even a blind Edge is able to knock him out of the air but Orton gets in a cheap shot to give Flair two. Cue Shelton Benjamin to take care of Orton, leaving Edge to spear Flair for the pin.

Rating: C-. The wrestling wasn’t much here but it gives us another step forward in Benjamin vs. Orton, which almost has to be the title match at Bad Blood. The perk of having a group like Evolution is you can throw a variety of people at them, including Edge and Shelton, both of whom are getting a nice rub as a result.

HHH and Batista are waiting on Shawn.

Earlier today, Vince McMahon had a bunch of women behind him to announce a reality show called the $250,000 Raw Diva Search. Have fun meeting the new generation that brought the women’s division down to new depths.

We look back at last week when Lita said yes to Kane.

Matt tries to find out what Lita was saying yes to but she still won’t say. They haven’t talked all week and he’s been worried about her. She’s been thinking about him and realizes she loves him. They kiss, and she wants to show him how much she loves him. Lita goes into her locker room to get her bag and finds (in addition to a camera waiting) Kane. Apparently something has happened between them but Kane said it was over. He says it is indeed over, allowing Lita to leave, without telling Matt what happened.

HHH and Batista go to beat up….Steven Richards as he arrives by mistake. Batista is sent to check on the rest of Evolution and HHH kicks Richards one more time to let off some steam.

La Resistance vs. Rosey/Hurricane

During the entrances, we’re told that Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young will be on the Tonight Show. I NEED to see this….I think. Rosey throws Conway to the floor to start and it’s off to Hurricane for a middle rope legdrop. Hurricane picks up the pace but gets low bridged out to the floor so the French beatdown can begin.

Conway works on an ankle twist until an enziguri gets Hurricane out of trouble. That’s enough for the hot tag to Rosey, who hits a running spinning legdrop on Grenier. Rosey rolls underneath a double clothesline (which you don’t see very often) and hits one of his own, allowing Hurricane to hit a high crossbody for two. The Shining Wizard misses though and Grenier gets in a cheap shot, setting up a rollup to finish Hurricane.

Rating: D+. Nothing wrong with a short match to get La Resistance over. Benoit and Edge need some regular teams to face and La Resistance, especially with Conway doing most of the work, is a perfectly fine choice. The match was short enough to not be too bad, though Hurricane and Rosey don’t have the same charm without their funny vignettes.

HHH is still waiting when Shawn pops up for the fight. Referees and security eventually break it up, though after both guys get in a few more shots.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel and Jericho is proud of himself for getting rid of Christian. The sexy beast is hot and so is his guest tonight. That would be Randy Orton, who is on fire right now. Orton comes out and Jericho praises him for holding the Intercontinental Title longer than anyone in the last seven years. Jericho lists off the names that Orton has killed, including Steve Austin, before moving on to Shelton Benjamin. That doesn’t do anything for Orton, because Benjamin is NOT getting a title shot.

That makes the next question obvious: why is Orton scared of Shelton? Orton doesn’t like that and it’s made even worse when Jericho cuts him off. Jericho says Shelton beat HHH and since HHH is a legend, Orton must want to face him. That’s too much for Orton, who wants to put Jericho on his list. The fight is on but Batista runs in. Cue Shelton for the save and I think you know where this is going, with Bischoff coming out to make the tag match.

Chris Jericho/Shelton Benjamin vs. Batista/Randy Orton

Joined in progress with Jericho headlocking Orton down and then turning it into a bow and arrow hold. Back up and a clothesline keeps Orton in trouble, which is made even worse by a tag to Shelton. Batista comes in as well and Shelton looks a bit nervous. Batista grabs him by the throat so Shelton kicks at the leg. That just earns him a heck of a clothesline and it’s Evolution taking over.

A neckbreaker gets Shelton out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Jericho to speed things up. The Walls are broken up so Jericho settles for a springboard dropkick to knock Batista off the apron. Now the Walls can go on but Batista makes the save, only to have Jericho dive onto both of them on the floor as we take a break. Back with Jericho in trouble, because that’s how WWE returns from commercials. Trish Stratus jumps in on commentary as Orton starts working on the arm.

Batista gets in his own arm cranking as Lawler keeps drooling over Trish. A crank of the arm cuts off Jericho’s comeback and it’s off to a shortarm scissors. Benjamin gets drawn in like a moron, allowing Batista to come in for a cross armbreaker. Jericho finally fights up and hits a springboard dropkick to drop Orton, setting up the hot tag to Benjamin.

House is cleaned as everything breaks down with a sunset flip getting two on Batista. That’s not cool with him though, so a hard clothesline takes Benjamin’s head off. Orton comes in and gets rammed into Batista for two off a rollup, followed by a powerslam for the same. Jericho cuts Batista off and it’s the exploder suplex to put Orton away.

Rating: B. Like I mentioned earlier, WWE can get miles out of this Evolution vs. everyone feud because they can do matches like this for months. Benjamin pinning Orton should be the logical way to set up the title match, which is the logical path for him after all those wins over HHH. Good match here, which is becoming commonplace on this show in this spot.

Post match Trish yells at Jericho, allowing Tyson Tomko to run Jericho over. Tomko powerbombs him through the announcers’ table for a bonus.

Here’s Kane to talk about how he’s envious of Chris Benoit for a variety of reasons. He wants to be the World Heavyweight Champion and live his dream life instead of a life of nightmares. That all changes at Bad Blood because he always gets what he wants.

Shawn is in Bischoff’s office, demanding that the match be the way he wants it. Bischoff agrees and here’s HHH to jump Shawn. Security finally breaks it up again.

Victoria vs. Molly Holly

Non-title and Gail Kim is here with Molly. Victoria spends a lot of time dancing on the way to the ring, which isn’t the worst thing in the world for a variety of reasons. Molly wastes no time in sending her to the apron where Gail pulls Victoria face first onto the apron. Back in and Molly grabs a double fish hook as the announcers talk about the Diva Search. A reverse cravate goes on and Victoria stays in trouble. There’s a running flip neckbreaker for a slightly delayed two but Victoria grabs a backslide for the same. Gail gets knocked off the apron and the Widow’s Peak finishes Molly in a hurry.

Rating: D. The women’s division is a mess right now as Victoria has cleaned the whole thing out, aside from Trish. The other problem is the talent isn’t exactly being treated as anything special. Is there really any reason for these two to be fight other than what happened two months ago at Wrestlemania? We need something a little better than that.

Post match Gail jumps Victoria and is quickly taken down by a Widow’s Peak of her own.

Smackdown Rebound.

Bischoff tells Johnny Nitro to round up the roster to act as security tonight.

Post break, Bischoff gives the locker room a speech about getting control back. If they don’t help, they’re all fired. Chris Benoit should not be in the same crowd as Val Venis and Hurricane.

We look back at the Rock/Eugene/Coach segment from last week. Still awesome.

Eugene is running around like a plane as William Regal is starting to warm up to him. When asked about Rock, Eugene goes into IF YA SMELL and Regal seems proud. They’re teaming tonight but Nitro comes in to say Regal isn’t cleared and can’t wrestle tonight. That’s too far for Regal, but the threat of Bischoff means it’s going to be a handicap match, unless Eugene can find a partner. Regal gives him a brief pep talk and the tag match is next.

Jonathan Coachman/Garrison Cade vs. Eugene/???

Eugene needs a partner for THESE TWO? He has one anyway and it’s….Chris Benoit. Egads they’re attaching a rocket to Eugene and it’s kind of awesome. The shocked face on Coach and the elation from Eugene make this even better. Eugene grabs the titles and starts running around so Coach trips him, which isn’t cool with Benoit. The early chopping has Cade in trouble and there’s the snap suplex. Eugene comes in and takes Cade down with a headlock without even taking the jacket off.

Cade hits Coach by mistake so we’ll go with a crisscross, setting up “HEY! WHAT’S THAT?” and a chop to Cade’s head ala Chief Jay Strongbow. It’s back to Benoit, who gets chopped and clotheslined in the corner by Cade. Coach comes in and Lawler knows it’s not going to end well. Everything breaks down and it’s an airplane spin to Cade. Benoit rolls some German suplexes on Coach and drops the Swan Dive. Eugene gets to hit one of his own for the pin and another big reaction.

Rating: C. There’s something so easy to cheer for about someone who has no business being here but succeeds anyway. Eugene is such a ridiculous concept but WWE has turned it into one of the most well done concepts they’ve had in a long time. This was especially strange to see if you watched Eugene in OVW, where he was basically a Benoit clone, down to using the rolling German suplexes and Crossface as his finishers.

Shawn and HHH are at it again. Good grief get a ring already.

Here’s HHH for the big showdown to end the show. He wastes no time in calling Shawn out so the fight is on. Shawn gets the better of it but has to deal with Evolution. Benoit and Edge come take care of the extras so here are some goons to try and break it up. Shawn gets in the dive onto the pile so more guys come out and finally separate them. Bischoff makes the big announcement of Hell in a Cell at Bad Blood. More brawling ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I’m having flashbacks to being a huge Eugene fan back in the day and it’s helping to fuel this string of very good shows. They’re building up new and actually interesting characters instead of slapping an ugly coat of paint on someone who wasn’t that great in the first place. It’s no surprise that Raw is smashing Smackdown every single week right now and why I’m really enjoying these shows week after week. Good stuff here, assuming you ignore the World Champion being treated like an upper midcard act with a non-existent feud with Kane for the pay per view. Fix that and the show is that much better.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

I think I like these people.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-praise-indy/

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 1993
Date: November 24, 1993
Location: Boston Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 15,509
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

This really is a transitional time for the company as the major stars of the past are all out of the picture, save for the occasional appearance by Savage. Bret is one of the top stars in the company but is taking a back seat to the more muscular and arguably more marketable Lex Luger. Hart’s time would come though. Let’s get to it.

Vince and Bobby talk a little bit about the concept and we’re ready to go.

Team IRS vs. Team Razor Ramon

IRS, Adam Bomb, Diesel, Rick Martel

Razor Ramon, 1-2-3 Kid, Marty Jannetty, Mr. Perfect

IRS and Ramon are feuding over the now face Razor’s Intercontinental Title, Martel was the guy Ramon beat for the title, Diesel (a big man and Shawn Michaels’ bodyguard) and Adam Bomb (a good sized power man) are just there to fill in spots, Jannetty and Kid (a rookie who shocked the world earlier in the year by beating Ramon on Raw) are a semi-regular tag team and Perfect….isn’t here.

Ramon talks about Perfect leaving (his back messed up again and he just kind of left for five months) but he’s got a treat for us. Razor has a surprise partner and it’s……RANDY SAVAGE! Heenan LOSES IT and the crowd does right along with him. This is when Savage wanted to murder Crush, who is in the main event tonight. Savage and Crush had been friends but Crush had turned on him and beaten Savage up, over Savage not visiting Crush when he was injured.

Heenan apparently called Perfect no showing this and Vince says Heenan was right for once. Bobby: “FOR ONCE???” Ramon and Martel start things off with Rick working on the arm. They fight for the arm and hit the mat for a bit before popping back up. Razor slaps him in the face and rolls through a cross body for two. Martel gets caught in the fall away slam (BIG pop for that) for two.

Razor hits a pair of atomic drops and a clothesline for two. Off to Adam Bomb who shoves Ramon into the corner with ease. They collide and Razor is knocked down in a bit of a surprise. They have a test of strength with Bomb controlling again before Ramon fights up and suplexes Bomb down.

Martel tries to save but elbows Bomb by mistake. Harvey Wippleman (Bomb’s manager) gets up on the apron and is knocked down, causing a big fight between IRS’ team. Ramon’s team uses common sense and lets them fight. I’ve never gotten why anyone would interfere when their opponents are doing damage to themselves. We get things settled down and it’s the Kid vs. Bomb. Kid tries a sunset flip and Bomb (about 6’8 and 300lbs) has little problem countering.

Off to Diesel who throws Kid around even harder. I’m not sure why they keep putting Kid in there against these monsters. A gutwrench powerbomb from Diesel leaves Kid laying and a big boot does the same. Kid finally hits a spin kick and it’s off to Savage who destroys the entire team, including sending Bomb into Diesel. A slam puts Diesel down and the flying elbow makes it 4-3.

Martel charges in and rams Savage face first into the buckle. Since it’s 1993, Martel’s offense has almost no effect and Savage takes over. Off to IRS who has a bit better luck as he takes Savage into the corner but gets cross bodied for two. Back to Ramon who works on the arm but as he hits the ropes, Martel hits Razor in the back to slow the Bad Guy (Razor’s nickname) down.

Bomb comes back in to power Razor around a bit but it’s quickly back to IRS who works on Razor’s back. We hit the chinlock and the heels switch a few times without tagging. Villains. Off to Macho Man again who knees IRS into the corner. A slam looks to set up the elbow but here comes Crush. Savage sees him and immediately goes after him but is sent back into the ring and rolled up by IRS for the pin and elimination.

Savage chases Crush into the back and looks for him in the locker rooms as the match is still going on. Savage doesn’t find him so we’ll continue this game later. We come back to the ring to see Bomb choking away on Jannetty and stomping him in the corner. Martel hooks an abdominal stretch for a few seconds but a corner charge hits the post and it’s back to Ramon.

Razor pounds away on IRS and hits a chokeslam followed by the Razor’s Edge for the pin and the 3-2 advantage. Everything breaks down and as Razor loads up the Edge on Martel, IRS hits him in the ribs with his briefcase. Ramon rolls to the floor and gets counted out to tie things up again. So it’s Jannetty/1-2-3 Kid vs. Martel/Bomb. The Kid gets sent to the floor and slammed down by Bomb who hits a slingshot clothesline to take the Kid down back inside.

Off to Martel as the Kid is in a lot of trouble. Martel drops some knees on the back for two as Vince says the Kid has a lot of heart. Heenan: “THEN KICK HIM IN THE HEART!” Martel jumps into a right hand to the ribs and there’s the tag to Jannetty who cleans house. Back to the Kid way too soon for a double back elbow and a sunset flip to eliminate Martel. Kid immediately tags in Jannetty who sunset flips Bomb for the pin ten seconds after Martel was eliminated. REALLY hot ending here.

Rating: B. I really liked this match as it was fast paced and a ton of fun. If you cut about five minutes from this, it’s a classic. Having Jannetty and the Kid be the survivors was a very nice surprise and it gave the fans something to cheer for. I really liked this one and it puts the show off on the right foot.

Shawn is in the back with the Intercontinental Title. There are two belts at this point as Shawn was suspended while champion but he kept the belt. That gives us two belts which presents a problem. Maybe we should put them above the ring and make the guys climb a ladder to get them while having one of the best matches ever. Anyway tonight it’s Shawn and his Knights vs. the Hart Family.

We go to a Hart Family interview earlier with Family Feud (game show) host Ray Combs. They all say that Shawn is in trouble for going after Stu recently and it’s going to be a massive Hart Attack.

Back to Shawn who says he’s not ready for the Harts and he makes fun of all five of them, including Stu. Shawn is really clicking as the insanely arrogant heel by this point.

Jannetty and Kid celebrate with Ramon. Savage is off chasing Crush.

Combs is in the ring to talk about the Hart Family being at ringside. Pay attention because it’s amazing enough to have them all in the same place without suing or trying to kill each other. Combs gets in some jokes about Shawn which aren’t really funny but this is filler stuff anyway. Vince of course laughs like there’s no tomorrow.

Hart Family vs. Shawn Michaels/Knights

Bret Hart, Keith Hart, Bruce Hart, Owen Hart

Shawn Michaels, Blue Knight, Black Knight, Red Knight

The Blue Knight is Greg Valentine, the Red Knight is Barry Horowitz and the Black Knight is Jeff Gaylord (indy guy who never meant anything on a national stage). Stu Hart is here with his sons as if there was somehow any doubt as to who was getting destroyed. Ray Combs sits in on commentary and while he’s not incredibly funny, he sounds like he’s having a blast out there and is enjoying himself which is all I ask for from a celebrity. Heenan vs. Combs on commentary is a good back and forth jab fest if nothing else.

Shawn and Owen start but Shawn wants Keith, who along with Bruce haven’t wrestled in years. Keith speeds things up and Shawn gets sent into the interfering Red Knight. Shawn tries to throw Keith into the corner but Keith takes out Red and Blue. An armdrag takes Shawn down and it’s Keith with an armbar. Shawn’s suplex attempt is countered into a small package and it’s back to the armbar.

Michaels slams Keith down and it’s off to the Red Knight vs. Owen. Owen fires off some shots to the arm and it’s off to the Black Knight. That goes nowhere at all so let’s try Bret vs. Blue. Bret hits some atomic drops and a clothesline for two. Back to Keith who continues the armbar marathon and it’s Bruce time again. Off to Shawn with a backbreaker and some elbows to the back.

Red comes in and suplexes Bruce down for two. Back to Black who is the biggest of the Knights and gets rolled up for two. It’s back to Shawn who gets rammed into the corner before Red pokes Bruce in the head. Bruce hits a clothesline and it’s off to Bret vs. Black. An O’Connor Roll and small package get two each for Bret as he takes over. The backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two and it’s off to Owen.

A spinwheel kick drops Black and everything breaks down. Shawn and all three Knights get sent into each other in the middle of the ring and a missile dropkick from Owen pins Black. Off to the Red but Owen works over his leg. Back to Bret and who helps make a wish on Red’s legs. Keith comes in again and the leg work continues.

Red tries a knee lift and hurts his own knee in the process. Some fans chant boring and they’re right in doing so. Back to Bruce who pops Red in the face. The Hitman comes in and we get another wishbone split. Red sends Keith into the buckle to escape a figure four attempt but misses a knee drop instead of tagging. Keith puts on a Figure Four but Shawn makes the save and it’s off to Blue. Those boring chants are getting a little bit louder.

Blue works over Keith’s arm and it’s off to Shawn with a top rope double ax to the arm. The shoulder gets sent into the buckle and Shawn cranks on the bad arm. Back to Red whose leg seems fine now. Rey cranks on the arm around the post which results in more double teaming. Heenan has been ripping the Harts apart the entire match, including a nice jab here: “None of them look alike.” Keep in mind this is as Keith is having his arm destroyed.

Blue stays on the arm including dropping a leg, followed by a hammerlock slam. Off to Shawn who misses a Rocket Launcher, allowing the tag to Bret, prompting Shawn to tag out to Red. Red immediately gets caught in a spinebuster and the Sharpshooter to make it 4-2. Blue comes in to clothesline Bret and both he and Keith are now hurt. Bret is thrown back in and suplexed down for two.

Blue drops a very Greg Valentine elbow and Heenan says he knows who the Blue Knight is. Vince: “Who is that?” Bobby: “The guy in the ring that just dropped an elbow on Bret Hart.” I love you Bobby Heenan. Back to Shawn for a chinlock to kill even more time. I’m not sure how much there is of it left as this has been going long already. Blue comes in for another two off another elbow as Bobby lays into Helen Hart.

Bret hits a middle rope clothesline and he makes the tag to Owen. The crowd just does not care here and the lack of any reaction is kind of sad. A middle rope elbow gets two on Blue and Bruce and Shawn come in at the same time. Shawn goes to the floor and goes after Stu, only to get BLASTED IN THE FACE. Bobby: “I’ve always liked Stu.” A missile dropkick puts Blue down and Shawn’s saving elbow hits Blue as well. Shawn is sent to the floor and the Sharpshooter eliminates Blue.

It’s 4-1 and Shawn is drinking water. All four of the Harts hammer on Shawn and it’s Bruce who gets two off an elbow drop. Bruce charges into a boot and Shawn chokes away a bit. The superkick, still not a finisher, gets two on Bruce. Bruce gets in a boot and makes the tag to Bret to a small reaction. Bret hits a slingshot to the buckle for two. Shawn gets in a kick and it’s off to Owen.

Now here’s where it gets interesting: Bret is trying to get it together on the apron and Owen is rammed into Bret, knocking him off the apron and into the barricade. Owen is distracted by the mistake, allowing Shawn to roll him up for the pin. All of the Harts go to check on Bret and Owen FREAKS, storming to the back and shouting WHAT ABOUT ME! This would start the feud of the year in 1994.

Bruce comes in and drops an elbow on Shawn for two. Bret is still getting up after the crash he took into the barricade. Bruce and Shawn hit head to head twice in a row to really stretch this thing out. Keith comes in with an abdominal stretch (including the toe around the ankle) but Shawn hip tosses out of it with ease. Back to Bret who pounds away and crotches Shawn on the top rope. Bret picks the leg but Shawn escapes the Sharpshooter and walks out for the countout.

Rating: D. This was…….long. At the end of the day it ran 30 minutes when it should have been about 15. The only thing that mattered here was Owen and the future angle vs. Bret. Shawn being in there didn’t help much, but it needed to be Jerry Lawler and without him this didn’t mean anything of note. Not a good match and the length hurt it a lot. They were against things they couldn’t really help here and that’s what brought it down a lot.

Owen comes back and gets in Bret’s face during the celebration. Stu tries to calm Owen down but Owen rants about getting no recognition and celebrates in the ring on his own. Helen, the matriarch in the audience, loses it as well.

Gorilla and JR are going to do commentary on the next match as Heenan and Vince are going to do Radio WWF, an idea which didn’t last long. During the change over, Gorilla threatens to kill Heenan as was his trademark at this point.

We recap the Foreign Fanatics vs. the All Americans. Ludvig Borga hit Tatanka with a chair and pinned him with one finger, breaking Tatanka’s two year undefeated streak. Tatanka then got beaten up by Yokozuna. This led to the Steiners and Luger picking a new partner in the Undertaker. This led to an awesome moment with Undertaker opening his coat and having an American Flag inside of it (with 13 stars for some reason). Luger then beat up Quebecer Pierre in a singles match to put him out of the pay per view. The Fanatics added the EVIL FOREIGN Hawaiian Crush.

Here’s Jim Cornette to introduce his team for a very out there match.

Smokey Mountain Wrestling Tag Titles: Heavenly Bodies vs. Rock N Roll Express

This is part of an agreement the companies had at the time which didn’t work that well. The Express (Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson, a legendary team from the 80s) are the champions and they’re defending against Tom Prichard and Jimmy Del Ray. It’s a brawl to start with the Express being sent to the floor. Gibson is pulled back in but Morton pulls both of the Bodies out to the floor. Ricky follows that up with a suicide dive to take both of them out at the same time.

Things slow down and we start with Gibson vs. Del Ray. They’re going to go very fast in this match and that’s exactly how it starts with Gibson flipping out of the corner and hitting a headscissor takeover before bringing in Morton. Prichard comes in and gets booed louder than all of the Knights in the previous match combined. Morton can’t quite get above Prichard on a leapfrog and he ducks a Del Ray superkick which takes Prichard down instead.

Both Bodies get monkey flipped out of the corner and we get the always dumb looking rowboat spot, where all four of the heels’ legs are rotated around by the good guys. Gibson works on Prichard’s leg and the Express take out Del Ray in the corner before Morton works on Prichard’s leg as well. Tom finally gets in a shot and it’s off to Del Ray who is immediately armdragged down.

In a nice move, Gibson blocks the buckle before Morton’s back hits it to prevent the Bodies from getting the advantage. It’s been all Express other than the first fifteen seconds. The Bodies have a quick huddle on the floor and the fans are bored. It’s Prichard vs. Morton now with the heels taking over for the first time since the beginning. Off to Del Ray who is suplexed down onto Morton for two.

Back to Prichard for some more choking. There wasn’t a tag but that’s why the Bodies are heels. Del Ray hits an Asai Moonsault to the floor and it’s back to Prichard in the ring who hits a powerslam for two. Off to a chinlock as this match is turning into an old school tag match of the NWA style. A Trash Compactor (a kind of spinebuster/guillotine legdrop combo) gets two but Del Ray’s powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana for two. Ricky hooks a small package for another two and Del Ray hits a moonsault press on Morton for ANOTHER two. This is why it’s called Playing Ricky Morton. The guy was a master at it.

A double DDT puts the Bodies down and Morton rolls over to make the tag to Gibson. Now we get to the point of the match: Prichard throws Morton over the top, which is a DQ in SMW but this is in the WWF. Gibson gets confused and decked for his confusion as Morton gets beaten down even more. There’s the double dropkick to Prichard but it only gets two. Del Ray comes off the top with a tennis racket (Cornette signature) shot to Gibson for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B-. This was a strange match as from a technical standpoint it was quite good and in SMW it would have been the main event of a big show, but we’re not in SMW. We’re in the WWF here and these people don’t mean anything. There’s a deep history here of a ton of matches with various gimmicks to them, making this a huge feud. The problem is all we’re told is they’ve been feuding for years. It’s the same issue you have with Japanese or other foreign wrestlers: just being told how great they are doesn’t mean anything to most fans. We need to see these things, not be told about them.

Team Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Four Doinks

Bam Bam Bigelow, Bastion Booger, Headshrinkers

Bushwhackers, Men on a Mission

Ok. I can get through this. The Doinks are all dressed like a clown and their identities were secret until they were unveiled here. Luke comes out on a scooter, Butch has a wagon, the Men on a Mission come out on foot. Mabel needs the exercise so that’s a good idea. Notice that there’s no actual Doink in the match and the fans aren’t going to be pleased here.

A LOUD We Want Doink chant starts up and Bastion and Luke start things off. Booger is a VERY fat guy in a too small singlet in case you’re not familiar with him. Luke bites him on the ample singlet before stomping on Bastion’s foot. Afa bites Butch’s balloon and it’s off to Samu. Then he bites a water balloon and gets rolled up by Luke for the pin. Fatu comes in and Luke hurts his own head off a headbutt attempt.

Booger comes in and drops a leg on Luke and it’s off to Bigelow with a headbutt to the ribs. It’s back to Booger who sits on Luke before stopping for a banana. Another drop by Bastion misses and the Battering Ram puts him down. Mabel drops a leg on Bastion and it’s 4-2. Fatu comes in to offer meat to Luke and takes over, but here’s Mo on a scooter for a ride around the ring. Bigelow comes in and destroys the scooter and Fatu hits the top rope splash….and stops for a banana.

Butch comes in with a bucket of something….scratch that as there’s nothing in it, but Fatu slips on a banana peel as he jumps from it and Butch rolls him up for the pin. Bigelow is all that’s left and he gets to fight Mabel. Bam Bam can’t do anything to the power of fat but Mabel misses a splash. The other Doinks come in and get beaten up also but Butch throws something on Luna. Mabel splashes Bigelow and a dog pile (which is allowed) gets the pin.

Rating: F. For failure, which is one of the few words to describe how bad this was. I am in awe. We had falls from a water balloon, a banana peel and a bucket of something being thrown on Luna. On top of all that, Doink, the point of the whole thing, wasn’t even in the match despite it being a character that could be played by almost anyone.

As Bigelow is leaving, Doink (whose performer has recently changed) pops up on screen to laugh at Bam Bam. The next step in this feud: a midget named Dink of course.

The Doinks, including the real Doink, celebrate in the back. Why the REAL Doink couldn’t be in the arena isn’t answered.

The Foreign Fanatics are in the back and Cornette talks about their battle plan. He talks about how they look at the All Americans as one man. You can take a man out by taking out his heart, his mind and his soul. The Steiners are the heart, but if you take it out, he has no will to fight. The Undertaker is the mind, but if you take it out, the man is confused. Luger is the soul, but if you take it out, you’ve defeated him completely. I’ve always liked that promo.

Before the match, we get a history lesson about Boston. No seriously, this happens. Thankfully it turns into some promos from the All Americans.

Foreign Fanatics vs. All Americans

Foreign Fanatics: Yokozuna, Crush, Ludvig Borga, Jacques

All Americans: Lex Luger, Undertaker, Steiner Brothers

The Quebecers are the Tag Team Champions and have Johnny (Raven Polo) as their manager. Yokozuna is WWF World Champion. Jacques and Scott start things off and Jacques offers a handshake. Scott says screw you in classic Freakzilla style. Scott hits a quick belly to belly for two and it’s off to Rick. Jacques brings in Yokozuna and things slow down almost immediately. Rick hits a clothesline and a shoulder to knock Yokozuna out to the floor but it doesn’t do much good.

Off to Borga to knock Rick to the floor but Steiner comes back in off the top with a shoulder for no cover. Borga misses an elbow and Rick goes up again, coming off with a cross body. Borga rolls through it and Rick isn’t moving at all, giving Borga an easy pin. Rick finally starts moving and holds his leg, so I’m thinking that’s a legit injury. Rick can’t stand up on the floor.

Scott comes in next and gets to fight Jacques. Rick eventually limps off on his own power which is a good sign at least. Scott hits a great gorilla press but Crush catches a falling Jacques and I guess that’s a tag. Steiner wants nothing to do with a test of strength so Crush pounds on him a bit. A butterfly powerbomb puts Crush down and apparently Savage is back in the building. Crush kicks Scott down and here’s Macho.

Crush throws Scott down to the floor over the top but he won’t go after Savage. Randy gets sent to the back and the dull match continues as Scott may have hurt his knee on that fall. The knee gets targeted now with Crush firing away some kicks and Savage is coming back AGAIN. Scott dropkicks Crush to the floor and Crush goes after Savage for long enough to draw a countout.

Jacques goes after the injured Scott now with a rear chinlock followed by an elbow to the jaw for two. Scott somehow hits a gorilla press on Jacques and there’s the tag to Lex. He slams Jacques down and drops a middle rope elbow for the elimination. It’s now Lex, Undertaker and Scott vs. Borga and Yoko. Borga comes in to face the still limping Scott as Undertaker hasn’t been in the match yet.

Ludvig pounds on the ribs and whips Scott in the corner so he can clothesline Steiner down. Borga goes up top but gets suplexed back down for two. Yokozuna comes in and pounds away, but Scott gets in some offense. He tries the freaking Frankensteiner which goes about as well as you would expect it to, resulting in a legdrop from Yokozuna eliminating Scott to get us down to two on two.

Luger comes in as we’re almost 20 minutes in with no Undertaker yet. Borga, a Finn, waves the Japanese flag. Yokozuna misses a splash and Lex pounds away, only to get clotheslined down with ease. Off to Borga who runs Luger over again and kicks him in the ribs. Back to Yokozuna who misses a charge, and it’s FINALLY off to Undertaker.

The Dead Man hits his running DDT and sits up but a Borga distraction lets Yokozuna suplex Undertaker down. There’s the situp and another after a clothesline. A legdrop keeps Undertaker down and there’s the Banzai, but Yokozuna goes for another, and Undertaker moves. A clothesline puts Yokozuna on the floor and they brawl to a double countout. See you at the Rumble boys. Undertaker was legally in the match for less than two minutes and forty seconds.

So it’s Lex vs. Borga now and as Undertaker and Yokozuna brawl on the floor. Ludvig has taken over and drops a leg on Lex. A side slam puts Lex down for two and Borga gets more two’s off various other power moves. He isn’t covering well though so he isn’t ready to pin Luger yet. A suplex puts Borga down and they clothesline each other. With Cornette distracting the referee, Borga hits Lex with Fuji’s salt bucket for two. Lex gets fired up and hits a powerslam and the loaded forearm for the final pin.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work either. Undertaker was the main draw and he wasn’t even in there for a tenth of the match. Yokozuna vs. Undertaker would go on to screw up two PPVs and Lex would never get the title, basically making the second half of 1993 totally pointless. This match didn’t work at all, and a lot of that is due to the heel lineup. Unless there was an injury or something, I don’t get why Pierre was taken out.

Santa comes out to celebrate with Luger just like last year.

Overall Rating: D. Let’s take a look at this card: great opener, WAY too long second match with the wrong main heel, a match from another company, the banana peel/water balloon fiasco, and the main event with an evil foreign Hawaiian. This show comes off as very long and dull, with most of the matches being completely uninteresting. It was uninteresting back in the day too, as this show got the lowest buyrate in the history of the Survivor Series up to this point.

Ratings Comparison

Team Razor Ramon vs. Team IRS

Original: B

Redo: B

Hart Family vs. Team Shawn Michaels

Original: D+

Redo: D

Rock N Roll Express vs. Heavenly Bodies

Original: B

Redo: B-

Four Doinks vs. Team Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: N/A

Redo: Awe

All-Americans vs. Foreign Fanatics

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Overall Rating:

Original: C+

Redo: D

It was almost the same until the overall rating. I don’t get how it jumps up that high off just a few better grades.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/12/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1993-usa-usa-usa/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6