Survivor Series Count-Up – 2018 (Original): The Pay Per View Squash

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2018
Date: November 18, 2018
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Renee Young, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

We’re finally here after what felt like the longest, most eventful two week build I’ve ever seen. The theme of the night is Raw vs. Smackdown and that likely means a lot of bantering between the commentators about the scoreboard and brand supremacy, which is all that matters around here. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Teams vs. Smackdown Tag Team

Raw: Bobby Roode/Chad Gable (captains), Revival, B-Team, Lucha House Party, Ascension

Smackdown: Usos (captains), New Day Colons, Good Brothers, Sanity

New Day handles the Smackdown introductions. Gable and Roode on the other hand promise a glorious victory. If one member of a team is eliminated, their partner is gone as well. Epico and Kalisto start things off with Kalisto tweaking his leg while flipping out of a belly to back suplex. Woods: “SWEEP THE LEG! SWEEP THE LEG!” The leg is fine enough to help Lince Dorado set up the planking splash for two and it’s off to Primo for the running crotch attack to the back of the head.

A blind tag brings in the Revival as Kalisto hurts his knee again, leaving Primo to walk into the Shatter Machine for the elimination at 3:09. It’s off to Karl Anderson vs. Curtis Axel as the fans are doing the Wave. Axel takes over with some stomps in the corner and a DDT gets two. Gallows gets in a cheap shot from the apron though and Anderson grabs a rollup to eliminate Revival at 5:00.

Next up is Killian Dain vs. Chad Gable with Chad not being able to suplex him. Instead it’s off to Eric Young, who walks into a neckbreaker from Roode. Gable adds a moonsault and that’s it for Sanity at 6:23. Big E. grabs an abdominal stretch on Konnor and throws in some spanking for good measure. Viktor has some better luck with a chinlock on Woods, with the hold lasting as long as you would expect. Woods drops him and lifts up Big E. for the splash and a pin at 8:48.

It’s Gran Metalik replacing the injured Kalisto (because he can) but he hands it off to Dorado, who has to escape the Magic Killer. A hurricanrana sends Anderson into (not through) the ropes, followed by a dive. Back in and Metalik’s rope walk Swanton gets rid of the Good Brothers at 10:55. The Usos finally get involved with Jimmy hitting Metalik in the mouth but getting moonsault pressed for two. Jey comes in and catches Lince in a nasty looking Samoan drop for the pin at 12:02.

So it’s the Revival/Gable/Roode vs. Usos/New Day. That means Dawson kicking away at Woods but getting missile dropkicked. Everyone else gets knocked to the floor and it’s Gable tagging himself in as Wilder is sent to the apron. A German suplex into a neckbreaker gets two on Big E. the Rock Bottom into a Backstabber gets two on Roode with Gable making a save.

Dawson suicide dives Woods and Kingston, followed by a series of dives to take out almost everyone. In your EGADS spot of the match, Gable German superplexes Jimmy off the top onto the pile. Back in and Gable’s moonsault is caught in the air, followed by Up Up Down Down for the pin at 18:43.

Woods’ tornado DDT falls apart so he settles for punching Wilder down, only to dive into the Shatter Machine for the pin at 19:54. It’s the Usos vs. the Revival with a Steiner Bulldog getting two on Jimmy. A PowerPlex gets the same and the Shatter Machine is broken up. Back to back superkicks drop the Revival and it’s the Superfly Splash (with the Roman Reigns tribute) for the win at 23:21.

Rating: D+. This got a lot better once it was down to the last few teams but my goodness the first two thirds or so was worthless. All it did was showcase how little these teams meant and how easy it is to get rid of them. This showed how meaningless the tag divisions are as this might as well have been Roode/Gable/Revival vs. Usos/New Day. If nothing else it would have been better and not wasted so much time in the beginning. The ending was pretty fun, but that rapid fire elimination with no flow to anything is annoying.

The opening video focuses on this being the ONLY NIGHT OF THE YEAR where Raw and Smackdown fight. They’re kidding with that being a serious line right?

Smackdown Women vs. Raw Women

Smackdown: Naomi (captain), Carmella, Mandy Rose, Sonya Deville, Asuka

Raw: Bayley, Sasha Banks, Tamina, Nia Jax, Mickie James

So yes, they’ve actually changed out MORE names on this show, with Bayley and Banks taking the places of Natalya and Ruby Riott because those two can’t get along. When I said they would probably do that in the preview, I wasn’t serious. Are all these changes some kind of rib that I’m just not getting? I mean it’s not funny, so that likely makes it a WWE rib. Also Mandy is about as weak of a pick as you can get for the mystery partner, unless you can clone Tamina.

Naomi and Tamina start things off and the brawl breaks out in almost no time. Tamina is left alone to superkick Naomi out at 1:22 but Carmella rolls Tamina up to keep things tied at 1:33. And now, DANCE BREAK! Nia comes in (Cole: “Hashtag facebreaker!”) and gets kneed by Mandy and it’s off to Mickie for some forearms. A neckbreaker drops Mandy but she’s right back with an abdominal stretch. Asuka comes in for the showdown with Mickie, who grabs a headlock.

That just annoys Asuka who hits the hip attack and grabs something like an Octopus Hold. That’s broken up as well so it’s off to Sonya, who Cole thinks is the secret to the team. Mickie snapmares her down but Bayley tags herself in for the basement clothesline. Mickie is right back in but a blind tag lets Mandy hit a running knee for the pin at 7:37. Carmella moonwalks into a DDT on Bayley but spends too much time taunting Sasha, allowing Bayley to suplex her for the pin at 9:11.

It’s back to Mandy to hammer on Bayley in the corner until a missed clothesline allows the hot tag to Banks. The Bank Statement makes Mandy tap at 10:50, ending the run that Cole hyped up that wound up going nowhere. That leaves us with Sonya/Asuka vs. Nia/Sasha/Bayley and Sonya wraps Banks up in a bodyscissors. Banks slips out without much effort and brings in Bayley for the running knee in the corner.

Nia comes in but misses a charge into the post as the fans are very pleased to see her get hurt. Bayley gets two off a belly to back suplex to Sonya as Banks hits a Meteora off the apron to take Asuka down. Bayley and Deville fall to the floor and that’s a double countout at 15:27. Has Deville ever actually won a big match?

Anyway Asuka and Banks stare each other down on the floor before getting back inside with Asuka hitting a running dropkick. That lets her SHOW OFF THE SMACKDOWN SHIRT before sending Sasha flying with a German suplex. Nia is back up and gets hip attacked straight to the floor again. Banks fights back and hammers away before going up top, only to have Nia shove her off the top into the Asuka Lock for the tap at 19:35. Nia drops three legs on Asuka and hits the Samoan drop for the final pin at 20:24.

Apparently that puts Raw up 1-0, because the Kickoff Show match doesn’t count.

Stephanie McMahon, Baron Corbin, Paige and Shane McMahon do their annual bantering.

Shinsuke Nakamura (Smackdown) vs. Seth Rollins (Raw)

Rollins works on an armbar to start but Nakamura takes him to the rope for the head on his chest. An early Kinshasa misses and Rollins does a COME ON of his own. Rollins sends him outside and has a quick rest on the top rope. Nakamura gets Rollins to the apron but misses a high kick, allowing Rollins to hit a Fameasser to drop Nakamura face first onto the apron.

Nakamura is fine enough to hit a running knee to the face and Good Vibrations keeps Rollins in trouble. A double arm crank doesn’t get Nakamura anywhere so it’s back to the corner choke. This time Rollins grabs the foot and sends Nakamura face first into the middle buckle. Rollins dumps him out to the floor for the trio of suicide dives.

The top rope clothesline drops Nakamura but some kicks drop Rollins again. The reverse exploder is blocked and Rollins hits a superkick for two. Nakamura is right back with some more kicks to the head and a clothesline is countered into the triangle choke to put Rollins in real trouble.

That’s reversed into a buckle bomb but Nakamura wins a slugout and hits the Landslide for two. Rollins is right back up with the superplex into the Falcon Arrow and the Ripcord knee gets a rather close two. The frog splash misses and Nakamura hits the Kinshasa to the back of the head for an even nearer fall. Another Kinshasa is blocked with a superkick and the Stomp finishes Nakamura at 21:29.

Rating: B. I’m glad they got the time here but the fans waiting on Ambrose to run in didn’t do it any favors. The match itself was a good back and forth fight with both guys getting to hit their big stuff, but they never hit that next level that they needed to really make it work. It’s a good match, though I could go for Nakamura not losing clean when his title reign is already such a mess.

Raw 2, Smackdown 0

AOP (Raw) vs. The Bar (Smackdown)

Drake Maverick and Big Show are here as thirds. Akam powers Sheamus around to start and the fans are distracted by something in the crowd. Cesaro comes in for a swing but it’s the side slam/middle rope stomp to put the Bar in trouble. The chinlock doesn’t stay on long so Akam lifts Cesaro up and throws him into a knee from Rezar. Sheamus gets drawn in so Cesaro can be held back in the corner in a smart move. Some uppercuts don’t get Cesaro anywhere as he gets clothesline for two.

Rating: C-. Just like the previous match, this could have been something fun but it never hit that level they could reach. AOP winning makes sense here on its own but I’m not exactly looking forward to Smackdown winning the next few matches with no drama. Not too bad, but the Maverick thing was more stupid than anything else.

Raw 3, Smackdown 0

Shane McMahon gives Team Smackdown a pep talk when R-Truth comes in to try and get on the Smackdown roster. Shane points out that he’s already in and says that’s a relief. Miz promises autographed Marine DVDs if the team wins and Truth is thrilled with the idea of getting a Becky Lynch autograph. Anyway Shane says we have to win so Stephanie can’t. There’s the important part you see.

We recap the Cruiserweight Title match. Buddy Murphy won the title at Super Show-Down in Australia and Mustafa Ali has been chasing the title for most of the year. Murphy doesn’t think much of the much smaller Ali but he’s ready to fight again.

Cruiserweight Title: Mustafa Ali vs. Buddy Murphy

Murphy is defending. Ali hits him in the face a few times but gets tossed into the corner. That just earns Murphy a hurricanrana to the floor, meaning it’s a big flip dive to take him down. Ali goes up top again but Murphy shoves him all the way into the barricade for a great looking crash.

Back in and Murphy hammers away at the head and we hit the chinlock. Ali fights up and hits a dropkick but the rolling X Factor is countered with a big toss to the floor. That means the running flip dive from Murphy but Ali is right back with a spinwheel kick to drop Murphy. Now a hanging DDT can connect for two on the champ but the 054 is countered with a shove off the top.

Murphy loads up the announcers’ table but Ali is right there with a Spanish Fly off the table to the floor. That gets a rather hearty 205 chant and Murphy keeps the fans’ interest with back to back powerbombs. Murphy’s Law is countered so Murphy knees him in the face, setting up Murphy’s Law to retain at 12:20.

Rating: B. This was the usually awesome Ali match but the loss took away so much of the energy they had built up. I’m really not sure what the point was in having Ali lose again here but that’s been the case for him every single time. It’s a shame that he’s stuck on 205 Live where no one gets to see how good he really is.

Daniel Bryan has nothing to say.

Lars Sullivan is coming. No brand is mentioned.

Raw Men vs. Smackdown Men

Raw: Drew McIntyre, Dolph Ziggler, Finn Balor, Braun Strowman, Bobby Lashley

Smackdown: The Miz (captain), Samoa Joe, Shane McMahon, Jeff Hardy, Rey Mysterio

Shane, the guy pushing the heck out of Brand Supremacy, isn’t in a Smackdown shirt. Strowman and Joe start but McIntyre tags himself in. The argument lets Joe grab the Clutch on McIntyre but he rolls out and hits the Claymore to get rid of Joe at 36 seconds. Hardy comes in next and gets dropped as well so it’s off to Ziggler. Shane comes in as well and armdrags Ziggler down, only to walk into a dropkick and Fameasser. The Zig Zag gets two with Miz making a save.

Miz comes in legally but can’t get the Figure Four on Ziggler. McIntyre tags himself in again and that means a brawl with Strowman. For some reason the Smackdown guys break it up and a 619 sends Strowman outside. Shane loads up the announcers’ table for the big elbow to drop Strowman and we cut to Stephanie and Paige watching in the back. Back in and McIntyre headbutts Miz but he won’t tag Balor.

Balor tags himself in and kicks McIntyre but gets rolled up for two. A kick to Miz’s head sets up the Coup de Grace but Miz bails to the floor. Balor Sling Blades Hardy on the floor and dropkicks Miz into the barricade. Rey comes in and the fast pace continues but he misses the 619. That earns him a Sling Blade and Balor shotgun dropkicks him into the corner. Another Coup de Grace misses and the 619 into the springboard splash gets rid of Balor at 12:06.

McIntyre throws Balor to the floor but Lashley breaks up the 619 with a big boot to Rey. The delayed vertical suplex is countered with some knees to the head and a DDT. It’s back to Ziggler but Rey brings in Hardy to punch him in the face. Hardy can’t hit the Twist of Fate but goes after McIntyre, allowing Ziggler to grab a DDT for two. Now the Twisting Stunner can connect and the Swanton hits raised knees. Miz comes in for the running corner clothesline to Ziggler and Shane adds Coast to Coast for the pin 18:10. Renee: “Shane is taking years off his career tonight alone!”

I’ll leave that one alone for how dumb it was and go to Lashley stomping Shane in the corner to make myself feel better. Lashley suplexes him into the corner for the tag to Miz, who avoids a charge to send Lashley into the corner. A second Coast to Coast is knocked out of the air by Strowman and Lashley gets two on Shane with Rey making the save. It’s off to Hardy vs. Strowman and the powerslam gets rid of Hardy at 20:46.

That leaves us with Strowman/Lashley/McIntyre vs. Shane/Mysterio/Miz but Strowman reverses the 619 into the powerslam for the pin at 21:22. Miz panics when Strowman is waiting on him and tells Shane to go get him. Strowman catches Miz instead and powerslams him for the pin at 22:37. Shane pulls himself to his feet and says bring it so Strowman dropkicks him into the corner for a splash. There’s the powerslam for the final pin at 24:01.

Rating: C+. This was more like it, assuming you ignore Smackdown being beaten like a drum all night. I was worried when Shane was the last man standing for Smackdown but at least they only went kind of crazy (sure Shane can outlast a bunch of World Champions). I’m sure there’s some kind of a point to having Raw crush them like this, though I’m almost scared to hear that explanation.

Post match Corbin jumps Strowman.

How to help with California wildfires.

Rollins is proud of his win and ready to hit an ice bath. Not so fast though as he’s told that he’ll be defending the Intercontinental Title against Dean Ambrose at TLC. Rollins is cool with that, because Ambrose won’t be able to hide.

We recap Ronda Rousey vs. Charlotte. This was supposed to be Becky Lynch vs. Rousey but Nia Jax broke Lynch’s face so Charlotte is taking her place. This is pretty much a dream match and something that could headline some big pay per views.

Ronda Rousey (Raw) vs. Charlotte (Smackdown)

Rousey has some very striking red makeup around her eyes. Charlotte shoves her into the corner to start but has to fight out of the armbar. The Figure Eight doesn’t work either and it’s a standoff. Charlotte rocks her with a face first whip into the bottom buckle and it’s time to start in on the legs. An STF without a facelock has Rousey in trouble and Charlotte busts open the mouth with some elbows to the face.

Rousey fights up with an enziguri and chokes her over the top rope to put Charlotte in some trouble. Something like a triangle has Charlotte in trouble but she stacks it up for two. Now the regular triangle goes on, only to have Charlotte reverse it into a Boston crab. That’s reversed as well but Rousey can’t get the armbar. Instead Charlotte kicks her in the face out of the corner but the moonsault hits raised boots.

The spinning Samoan drop plants Charlotte, who pops up with a spear for two. Charlotte reverses another armbar attempt into the Figure Four but Rousey turns it over. They head outside with Rousey throwing her into the barricade and unloading with strikes back inside. Charlotte chops her right back and the big boot gets two.

Rating: B. This was getting awesome at the end with neither of them being able to do anything to put the other away but they went with the cop out ending instead of anything concrete. I can go with that, but again it’s not like this is the match that people were dying to see at the time anyway. The ending is far from terrible as you don’t want either of them taking the clean loss and it sets up a rematch down the line, but I was hoping for something more definitive.

Raw 5, Smackdown 0

Post match Charlotte destroys her with the stick before grabbing a chair. The Natural Selection drives Rousey into the chair and Charlotte beats up the referees. Rousey’s neck gets Pillmanized, drawing a LOUD THANK YOU CHARLOTTE chant. Rousey gets helped out but the fans don’t seem to have much sympathy. The turn makes sense as Charlotte couldn’t beat Becky and couldn’t beat Rousey but still believes she’s the best in the world. Also, the best part of this: the reaction from the production guy when Charlotte bent over in front of him to get the chair.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Daniel Bryan. This was going to be AJ Styles vs. Lesnar II but Bryan turned heel and won the title on Tuesday, setting up a match we were going to get four years ago.

Brock Lesnar (Raw) vs. Daniel Bryan (Smackdown)

There’s a second one and Bryan’s elbow is cut open. The third German suplex and an overhead belly to belly makes it even worse as Bryan is kicked out to the floor. Back in and Bryan rolls outside as this is complete destruction. Brock tosses him into the barricade and grabs a bearhug back inside. Lesnar drops him and then hits another German suplex. Fans: “SAME OLD S***!”

The bearhug goes on again and there’s another belly to belly. The F5 connects and Lesnar pulls him up at two. Bryan gets in a kick to the head but another F5 hits the referee. That means a low blow and the running knee gives Bryan two. Bryan unloads with kicks and stomps at the head and Lesnar is rocked….but the running knee is countered into an F5. That’s countered as well and Bryan sends him outside.

Lesnar gets posted and there’s the running knee from the apron. Brock drives him into the post twice in a row but the steps hit the post. That means another running knee from Bryan and the real one gets two on Lesnar. A chop block takes Lesnar’s knee out and Bryan wraps it around the post. The missile dropkick as Lesnar in trouble as Bryan is a full on face all over again.

The running corner dropkicks stun Lesnar and another F5 is countered into the YES Lock as Brock’s knee gives out. Lesnar panics for a bit until he just grabs the hand for the break. Bryan blasts him in the face and gets the hold in again, followed by a triangle choke. That’s reversed into an F5 though and Bryan is done at 18:44.

Rating: A-. It was almost the exact same formula as AJ vs. Brock from last year but hey, we can’t have Lesnar lose a match that means absolutely nothing. It was nice to see Lesnar selling for a change and it was an awesome match, but I can’t help laughing at Smackdown getting shut out. I also have no idea why the heel turn needed to happen as Bryan was a full on face here, save for the low blow. Great match with Bryan wrestling smart but not being able to pull it off, because Lesnar is going to Lesnar.

Raw 6, Smackdown 0.

Overall Rating: B+. I don’t know what to think of this show but egads that final score is either a rib or WWE finally doing what they’ve wanted to do for years now. The main event is very fun and might even be better than the AJ match from last year. Otherwise you get some good matches, but the announcers telling you that a lot of them didn’t matter might not have been the best way to sell them. They set up a few things going forward and the wrestling was entertaining, but the Brand Supremacy thing was even more of a waste of time than usual. Still though, very solid show and it flew by instead of crawling for a change.

Results

Raw Women b. Smackdown Women – Samoan drop to Asuka

Seth Rollins b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Stomp

AOP b. The Bar – Powerbomb/suplex combination to Sheamus

Buddy Murphy b. Mustafa Ali – Murphy’s Law

Raw Men b. Smackdown Men – Powerslam to McMahon

Ronda Rousey b. Charlotte via DQ when Charlotte used a kendo stick

Brock Lesnar b. Daniel Bryan – F5

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2017 (2018 Redo): Shane vs. Stephanie, Stephanie vs. Shane

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2017
Date: November 19, 2017
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 14,478
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T., Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

I barely remember this show other than it was a bunch of Raw vs. Smackdown stuff, including AJ Styles vs. Brock Lesnar. As usual, the modern stuff has no impact on me because so much of it feels like it’s going to be similar to whatever we’re likely to get this year. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Matt Hardy vs. Elias

This is a bonus match, because a four hour show needs more content. Before the match, Elias asks if anyone wants to go for a walk. You can wear red or you can wear blue, but at the end of the day, what would Elias do? The song gets cut off by the booing but he gets it going to talk about how much he hates Houston. Hardy’s music cuts him off again and we’re ready to go. Since it’s a major pay per view and WWE has a really weird way of doing their pre-shows, the are far more empty seats than filled ones opposite the hard camera.

Hardy headlocks him down to start as the announcers start talking about other matches on the show. The Russian legsweep sets up the middle rope elbow to the back of Elias’s head as we take a break. Back with Matt dropping a fist for two but getting his throat snapped across the top rope. Elias switches over to the arm and cranks on an armbar for good measure. The arm goes into the post as Corey talks about getting to see matches we’ve never seen before, such as HHH vs. Shane McMahon. I’d recommend studying your WWE Network before.

The armbar goes on, followed by a double underhook shoulderbreaker for two. Matt gets sent to the apron and Elias follows for some reason, allowing Matt to hit a Side Effect and take over. Back in and Elias gets sent into all three buckles, followed by the bulldog for no cover. Another Side Effect gets two and the middle rope elbow is good for the same. Elias is smart enough to hit him in the arm though and sends it into the post. Drift Away puts Hardy away at 9:16.

Rating: D+. I can never get around the empty seats during these first matches. What in the world is the point of having a match when it’s something that means as little as this and isn’t even any good in the first place? The arm work was fine and it played into the finish, but it was nothing that wouldn’t bore you in the third hour of Raw.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Enzo Amore

Amore is defending and was sent into a cake on 205 Live to really make this personal. Before the match, Enzo goes into a rant about Kalisto sending him into a cake that Enzo paid for. Tonight, Enzo is going to make beef stew out of chicken. Enzo is extra aggressive to start but Kalisto kicks him away without much effort. The chase to the floor is on and Kalisto follows him back in with a slingshot Code Red for two. Kalisto goes to the ropes once too often though and gets his throat snapped as we take a break.

Back with Enzo getting two off a clothesline and pulling him out of the corner into a side slam for the same (cool move). The chinlock goes on for a bit until a running forearm in the corner gets two more. That means a second chinlock with a Stunner not quite breaking the hold. It’s too early for the Salida Del Sol so Enzo puts him in the Tree of Woe, only to miss a charge and hit the buckle.

Kalisto hits a top rope moonsault but his ribs won’t let him get a cover. He’s fine enough to hit the hurricanrana driver but the Salida is broken up again. They slug it out on the apron and Enzo pulls him head first into the rob that connects the buckle to the post. The Jordunzo finishes Kalisto at 8:13.

Rating: D+. That’s one of the better matches I remember from Enzo, which probably had a lot to do with Kalisto being in there to do most of the hard work for him. There was little chance that Enzo was dropping the title here so at least they kept it short, even with a commercial included. Not a good match, but it could have been worse.

Kickoff Show: Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Breezango

Sami is freshly heel here and doesn’t like being stuck having to face losers like Breezango. They should be on Team Smackdown tonight but Shane McMahon is holding them back. It’s all part of the McMahon sibling rivalry but here’s Breezango to cut them off. They got a tip of some fashion violators and all that ungroomed facial hair proves they’re right. That’s bad enough for some violations so Fandango dropkicks Owens down. Owens and Zayn are sent outside where they have fashioned tickets rained down on them as we take a break.

Back with Sami getting sent outside again but Owens gets in a cheap shot this time to put Breeze in trouble. Owens comes in for his usual pummeling but it’s already back to Sami for the chinlock. A kick to the face isn’t enough to get Breeze out of trouble as Owens comes back in for a chinlock of his own. That’s not good enough, so we hit the fourth chinlock in about two minutes.

Owens mixes it up with a backsplash but hits knees, suggesting that he should have stuck with the chinlocks. The hot tag brings in Fandango for the snap jabs and a middle rope dropkick. A tornado DDT gets two with Owens making the save but Fandango misses the Last Dance. The Pop Up Powerbomb finishes Fandango at 8:32.

Rating: D+. Well this concludes the worst Kickoff Show I can remember in a long time. It didn’t seem like Owens and Zayn cared at all here and really, can you blame them? The previous month they were headlining a pay per view and now they’re on the Kickoff Show? That’s the best you can have for these guys? Fair point as that’s the idea of the story. Other than that, I still feel bad for what happened to Breezango as they got themselves over and then were just dropped for….whoever the Smackdown Tag Team Champions were at this point. Does it really matter if they’re that forgettable?

The opening video focuses on the war between Raw and Smackdown, featuring the UNDER SIEGE deal, which was mainly all about Stephanie vs. Shane. I still don’t get how they didn’t have the Usos with the Uso Penitentiary deal leading that charge. The rest of the Raw vs. Smackdown matches get a quick look of their own.

We have a FIVE MAN commentary booth. As usual, quantity equals quality in WWE’s eyes.

New Day vs. Shield

This didn’t get the attention that it deserved because it’s a genuine dream match. Before the match, Woods says that while this is great fuel for the fan fiction writers, it’s also time for them to show that they’re the most dominant trio in WWE history. Kofi brings up the Raw roster invading three weeks after Smackdown did and not even doing it as well. They’re about to go Bob Barker on the Hounds of Justice (How did no one get that line in before?) and when Wrestlemania time comes up, the Shield will bite each other (true actually, at least before Dean got hurt).

They’re the true brotherhood around here and it’s time to prove it. And now, before the match, here’s another video of Smackdown invading Raw and vice versa, in case you didn’t get the point six minutes ago. The only new material here is New Day costing the Shield the Tag Team Titles. Big pop for Shield, as you had to expect. Seth and Dean have the half Raw half Shield shirts but Reigns is too cool to go that route.

Ambrose and Kofi start things off as the fans are split here, apparently not able to pick which wristlock they like best. Booker’s preview for the night: “There’s not gonna be a whole lot of entertainment.” This man gets paid to do this people. Rollins and Woods come in with Woods quickly realizing that he’s in way over his head. As the announcers discuss titles, Big E. comes in to face Rollins. Now you NXT fans should get where commentary should be going, but of course nothing is mentioned.

It’s off to Reigns instead and this isn’t quite the showdown that WWE thinks it is. Big E. breaks up a waistlock attempt and runs Reigns over with a shoulder, only to have an elbow do the same to him. A good looking Samoan drop gives Reigns two….and the fans are there with the SWEET because we’re that lucky. Everything breaks down and a triple clothesline takes Big E. and Kofi to the floor, leaving Woods to get stomped down in the corner. Rollins comes off the top with a right hands to the ribs as the Shield starts their rhythm.

Ambrose gives up the tag to Kofi though and things pick up in a hurry. The Boom Drop hits Ambrose but he kicks Kofi out of the air. It’s too early for Dirty Deeds though and the Unicorn Stampede is on. New Day does it again for good measure and the fans aren’t thrilled this time around. That’s enough for Rollins and Reigns and everything breaks down. Big E. spears Ambrose through the ropes, thankfully not coming that close to death. That’s only good for two and things settle down again with Ambrose’s shirt being ripped off. It’s an improvement, as Ambrose looks more normal in all black.

The chinlock goes on for a few moments before Dean breaks up a superplex attempt. Big E. can’t get one either and Dean missile dropkicks him down instead. The hot tag brings in Rollins, albeit with an unnecessary jump from Dean. Seth springboards in with the clothesline and starts in with his usual fast paced offense. The announcers are already getting really annoying with this Raw vs. Smackdown stuff and Graves being in the middle is all that’s holding it together.

Reigns comes in for a jumping clothesline to Woods and the Superman Punch knocks him even sillier. Big E. breaks up the spear but Rollins saves Dean from the Midnight Hour. The jumping knee into Dirty Deeds gets two on Kofi with Woods making a save of his own. A fired up Woods comes in so Rollins kicks him in the face to calm things down. Now it’s Big E.’s turn to break up the TripleBomb and there’s Trouble in Paradise to Rollins. Reigns is laid out on the floor so Woods puts Big E. on his shoulders so Kofi can jump over them for a splash onto Dean.

Woods drops Big E. onto him as well but there’s no cover. Instead Big E. picks up Ambrose and Rollins for a double Midnight Hour, leaving Reigns to spear Big E. onto the covers for a save. Both teams pull each other up for a cool visual and the fight is on again. Dirty Deeds plants Big E. on the floor and the spear cuts Kofi in half. Shield isn’t done though and it’s a super TripleBomb to completely finish Kofi at 21:32.

Rating: B+. This took some time to get going but once they turned it into the big fight feel, it became what it should have been. These teams are both great in different ways and while New Day has had more success as a trio, it’s hard to argue with them beating three former World Champions. Shield winning is the right choice, but at the same time it means that we have to hear about Raw being up 1-0 on Smackdown for far too long now.

Cole: “Raw is up 1-0!”

In the back, Stephanie McMahon: “Raw is up 1-0!” She gives the Raw women’s team a pep talk and it’s about as over the top as you would guess.

There’s a scoreboard to show Raw is in fact up 1-0.

Raw Women’s Team vs. Smackdown Women’s Team

Raw: Sasha Banks, Bayley, Alicia Fox, Asuka, Nia Jax

Smackdown: Carmella, Natalya, Becky Lynch, Naomi, Tamina

Lana is in Smackdown’s corner and Fox and Lynch are the captains. During the entrances (which are going to take their sweet time), Phillips reminds us that Raw is in fact up 1-0. Does WWE really think we have the attention spans of drunken squirrels? We also get to see the Raw women invading the Smackdown locker room so we can hear about UNDER SIEGE for the fifteenth time in the show’s first forty five minutes.

Fox and Lynch start things off with Fox actually getting the better of it off some forearms. Becky gets in a neck snap across the top though and drops a top rope legdrop for two. The threat of the Disarm-Her sends Fox to the ropes so Bayley tags herself in and grabs a rollup to get rid of Lynch at 2:02.

Natalya comes in next to stomp Bayley in the corner as Booker can’t figure out who is on which show. Tamina misses a splash in the corner and gets forearmed in the head before it’s off to Asuka to a big reaction. That’s just a preview though as a few kicks to the legs are enough before Asuka hands it back to Fox. Since it’s Fox and she’s not very good, it’s already back to Bayley, who gets beaten up in the corner. Carmella hits a superkick and Tamina’s Superfly Splash gets rid of Bayley at 5:27.

That’s what you get for cheering her when you’re not supposed to people. Nia comes in to face Tamina, and it’s not interesting a year earlier either. A shot knocks Naomi off the apron and Tamina does the same to Asuka before neither can hurt the other. Nia’s headbutt hurts both of them but Nia splashing her in the corner only hates Tamina. Lana gets on the apron for some reason so Nia knocks her off, allowing Tamina to superkick her to the floor. A dive from Naomi and another superkick set up the crossbody off the apron to get Nia counted out at 9:01.

Asuka comes in to unload with kicks to Carmella and the hip attack gets two. Carmella pulls her down by the hair and hits a quick Bronco Buster before pausing to mock Sasha’s dance. For reasons of general stupidity, Carmella slaps Asuka in the face and it’s a knee to the head, followed by a heck of a kick to get rid of Carmella at 12:59. Banks and Natalya come in and hit each other a few times until Natalya gets the better of it for two. Sasha gets sent face first into the middle buckle and the Sharpshooter makes her tap at 15:22, leaving Asuka vs. Natalya and Tamina in the Ultimate Warrior at Survivor Series 1988 mold.

Natalya gets in a few kicks and hands it off to Tamina for a slam. The Superfly Splash that wouldn’t have hit even if Asuka hadn’t moved misses when Asuka moves and it’s a cross armbreaker to get rid of Tamina at 17:32. Natalya can’t get the Sharpshooter as Asuka pulls her into a kneebar, followed by a kick to the face. The Asuka Lock finishes Natalya at 18:27.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t great to start but the ending was exactly the right call with Asuka getting the star treatment at the end. The rest of the match wasn’t all that great as the focus was on Tamina (who still isn’t interesting, mainly because Nia is better at every single thing Tamina is around to do) or Alicia being wacky, making it an exercise in waiting around on Asuka. To their credit though, they got that part right and that’s what mattered most.

Here’s what coming on WWE Network. Don’t worry though, because they’ll air almost nothing but NXT, 205 Live and whatever tournament they have going on at the moment.

Stephanie (erg) brags to Daniel Bryan about Raw being up 2-0. She accuses Bryan of getting John Cena on the Smackdown men’s team by practically being family. Bryan: “Didn’t you put your husband on the Raw team?” It turns into a discussion of Wrestlemania XXX as this goes on way too long as we AGAIN recap the invasions. Sweet goodness WE WATCH THE TV SHOWS AND DON’T NEED TO HEAR THIS STUFF OVER AND OVER AGAIN! I haven’t watched the TV shows since last year and I can tell you what happens week by week just because of all these recaps.

Baron Corbin vs. The Miz

Smackdown vs. Raw and US Champion vs. Intercontinental Champion, though it’s non-title, like every match tonight. Miz has Bo Dallas and Curtis Axel with him and Corbin has been talking trash about Maryse and Miz’s unborn child. The threat of an early clothesline sends Miz bailing to the floor and it’s time for some consultation. A Dallas distraction lets Miz hit a baseball slide, followed by a clothesline to put Corbin right back on the floor. Corbin kicks him off the apron though as they’re going back and forth pretty fast so far.

The fans try to start some dueling chants but the LET’S GO MIZ chants are pretty clearly louder. Corbin misses a running crotch attack to the back but easily avoids a baseball slide. With Miz in trouble, Dallas hits Corbin in the knee to give Miz his first actual advantage. The Figure Four is easily blocked but a chop block cuts Corbin down again. Now the Figure Four goes on but that’s broken up in short order, allowing Corbin to hit Deep Six on one leg.

Dallas is right there again with a shot to the knee though and Miz adds a big boot. Corbin’s knee is fine enough to slide underneath the ropes and beat up the Miztourage but the End of Days is countered into a DDT for two. Some rather weak looking YES Kicks don’t have much effect so Miz hits the running corner dropkicks. Corbin shrugs them off though and End of Days is good for the pin at 9:26.

Rating: D+. Commentary really hurt this one as the put on Raw vs. Smackdown stuff continues. The leg work was fine but when Corbin is fine enough to do all of his usual stuff and then hit his finisher to win, it doesn’t mean that much. You had to give Smackdown something in this whole thing and given how bad the midcard titles are presented in the first place, this was the least painful loss for a champion.

Post match Corbin says he just shut everyone’s mouth.

Paul Heyman says everything about tonight is phenomenal, including AJ Styles. Then the bell will ring and the conqueror is going to rip AJ Styles apart.

Usos vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

Before the match, the Usos mock the Bar’s catchphrase and says they’ll be bartenders tonight. Or maybe they’re pole vaulters. Sheamus drives Jimmy into the corner to start and Jimmy isn’t sure what to do here. Instead it’s off to Jey who does the same to Sheamus, though he’s smart enough to stomp away and take over. As the announcers discuss Corey’s lack of success (as Booker hadn’t heard about it), Cesaro comes in and gets hiptossed down.

A quick double team puts Jimmy down though and it’s off to a headlock, because a chinlock isn’t sophisticated enough. Jimmy knocks Sheamus to the floor but a dive gets cut off by a Cesaro uppercut. Back in and Cesaro puts on a Crossface without the arm trap as Booker wants the Bar to be called the A-Team. Graves: “Why would you do that? They’re called the Bar Booker.” Sheamus drops a knee and puts on a chinlock with Cesaro running in to kick Jey off the apron.

The pop up uppercut gets two but Sheamus takes too long setting up the ten forearms to the chest. Booker: “Think about the brand!” Jimmy gets in a Whisper in the Wind and that’s enough for the hot tag to pick up the pace. He also picks up Cesaro with a backdrop into the corner for two, leaving Sheamus to argue with the referee. Jey gets in a superkick but Sheamus adds a forearm to the back, allowing Cesaro to Swing Jimmy into the Sharpshooter. The longest crawl to a rope I can remember gets Jey out of trouble, assuming you bought the Sharpshooter as a potential finish either (you shouldn’t have).

The spike White Noise is broken up and Sheamus is sent into the post. He’s fine enough to hold Jey up for White Noise with Cesaro adding a springboard spike. Jimmy makes a great looking last second save so Cesaro throws him out and loads up Jey in a powerbomb. Sheamus goes up top but gets punched in the face, allowing Jimmy to Samoan drop him down with Cesaro adding the powerbomb. Cesaro dives in the way of a double superkick, leaving Sheamus to take the same thing. Jimmy does the eternally cool tag while diving over the top to take out Cesaro. The Superfly Splash finishes Sheamus at 15:56.

Rating: B-. Yeah of course this was good with two very talented teams. Granted a year later the Usos haven’t had a meaningful match in forever and the Bar are now the Smackdown Tag Team Champions, but at least this was entertaining. If nothing else though, this is a great showcase of what happens when you just let people go and have a fun match, which is always going to help things out.

Jason Jordan, who was recently (and thankfully) replaced on the Raw team by HHH, wants to see HHH get eliminated before Team Raw wins.

We recap Charlotte winning the Smackdown Women’s Title on Tuesday to take Natalya’s spot tonight. If nothing else it was awesome to see Ric Flair come out after his health scares.

Charlotte vs. Alexa Bliss

Non-….you get the idea. Charlotte knocks her outside early on and is polite enough to hold the ropes open to invite Bliss back in. Booker of course talks about baseball. Back in and Bliss hides in the ropes before slapping her in the face. That earns Bliss a hard right hand so they head to the apron with Bliss snapping the arm to the floor. A dropkick into the steps has Charlotte in more trouble and it’s off to an abdominal stretch, though Charlotte has to kneel because Bliss isn’t that tall.

Some kicks to the ribs keep Charlotte in trouble and she gets sent face first into the middle buckle to make things even worse. Bliss tries to go aerial but a tornado DDT is countered into a t-bone suplex into the corner (with Bliss bouncing around as only she can). Charlotte gets crotched on top but rolls away before Twisted Bliss. That’s even worse for her though as she gets caught with middle rope double knees to the back (I still don’t get how that doesn’t cause a severe injury.).

Code Red gives Bliss two and she hammers away with even more fire than she usually shows. A guillotine choke has Charlotte in trouble (it worked for Bayley against Nia Jax) but a sitout powerbomb (looked great) breaks that up. The fans are split (as they should be) and Bliss breaks up the Figure Eight with a right hand that has the referee checking on Charlotte.

Natural Selection gets two but the moonsault misses (as always). Bliss grabs her DDT for two of her own so she chokes and screams a lot. Amazingly enough, Charlotte can pretty easily overpower Bliss and hits a spear to cut her in half. Back up and more kicks to the ribs have Charlotte in trouble but Twisted Bliss hits raised knees. A big boot sets up the Figure Eight to make Bliss tap at 15:46 and put Smackdown up 3-2.

Rating: B. Heck of a match here with Bliss looking like she could more than hang with someone on Charlotte’s level. You don’t see someone go move for move with Charlotte like this and it’s a great sign for Bliss’ future. The ribs story was perfectly fine, even if it meant that another champion had to lose. You know, because of bragging rights.

Post match, Charlotte nods in approval.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Brock Lesnar in another champion vs. champion match. Lesnar is the monster and AJ is the new underdog champion (sounds oxymoronish), thankfully saving us from Lesnar vs. Jinder Mahal.

Brock Lesnar vs. AJ Styles

Heyman handles Lesnar’s introductions, saying he’s fighting (Heyman: “Fighting. You hear that Mr. Performer?”) and the fans are split to start. Brock goes straight to the shoulders in the corner and throws AJ across the ring a few times. Forearms to the back keep AJ in trouble as the dominance is on early. One heck of an overhead belly to belly has Styles in more trouble and there’s the first German suplex. Lesnar sends him outside for a toss into the barricade as Cole is almost giddy.

Back in and another German suplex has AJ rocked but he tries to get up anyway. With Heyman cradling the Universal Title like a newborn, Brock hits a running knee in the corner. Lesnar wants him to fight and then clotheslines AJ right back down. Some right hands have little effect for Styles as Brock puts him down again. The F5 doesn’t work and Lesnar’s second running knee hits the buckle.

A DDT actually puts Lesnar down and it’s time to cheer for AJ as he kicks at the leg. Lesnar throws him off a tornado DDT attempt and they’re both down. AJ tries a springboard but gets caught in a German suplex that flips him over his head. Well of course it does. This time AJ ducks the big right hand and Lesnar falls to the floor, setting up the slingshot forearm. Brock goes knee first into the steps and there’s another forearm off said steps.

Rating: A-. Oh yeah this worked. I was getting into these near falls all over again as they were nailing the Rocky story. Lesnar knows how to play the monster but AJ is even better at being the fighting from underneath high flier. This was great stuff and I’d love to see it again, even if a year later they’re somehow right where they were here. Anyway, great performance from both guys as Lesnar shows he can still do it.

We recap the Raw vs. Smackdown men’s match. Allow me:

UNDER SIEGE

Invasion

Invasion

Stephanie is really, really annoying

Roster changes because they knew the original lineups were awful

Invasion

Got all that?

Raw Men’s Team vs. Smackdown Men’s Team

Kurt Angle, Braun Strowman, Finn Balor, Samoa Joe, HHH

Shane McMahon, Randy Orton, Bobby Roode, Shinsuke Nakamura, John Cena

What are the odds that the whole competition comes down to this? Shane jumps at Strowman to start because Shane is the most awesome person ever. That’s shrugged off so we’ll try Joe vs. Orton instead. Joe headlocks him into the corner without much effort so let’s go with Nakamura vs. Balor instead. That certainly gets the fans into it, though Cole ruins it a bit by calling him Shin. The feeling out process begins as the NXT chants start up.

Nakamura takes him to the ropes for the swinging arms, only to be reversed into a TOO SWEET to the head. HHH comes in for a kind of weird showdown and takes Nakamura into the corner for the right hands. Nakamura gets in the first kick to the chest but the facebuster sends him into the corner for the tag to Roode. This one isn’t so much weird as much as it is….nothing. Since Roode’s pose takes forever, HHH punches him in the face. Fair enough actually.

The spinebuster takes Roode down again but Roode counters the Pedigree and hits a spinebuster of his own. That means we get the GLORIOUS pose but the Glorious DDT is broken up. Instead HHH drives him into the corner for the tag off to Angle for the rolling German suplexes.

A double clothesline puts them both down so the Raw guys switch places on the apron. It’s off to Nakamura for the running knees so Joe comes in to make the save. Everything breaks down and Nakamura hits Kinshasa on HHH, only to run into the now legal Strowman. The middle rope knee staggers the monster but the running powerslam gets rid of Nakamura at 11:31.

Roode comes in and kicks at Strowman’s legs, followed by the Blockbuster. That’s not even good for one so Roode tries it again, earning himself another running powerslam for the pin at 12:22. For some reason Joe and Strowman get in an argument, as do HHH and Angle. Smackdown is smart enough to let them fight until Orton and Shane come in like idiots. Orton powerslams Joe and Cena is all fired up, only to have Strowman come in for a heck of a 2-1 showdown. The AA and RKO are both broken up and Strowman knocks them both to the floor.

Orton and Cena get together and the rest of Team Smackdown (including the eliminated members) get together to suplex Strowman through a table. Naturally Shane gets to talk the trash but Joe breaks up an elbow to the floor with a belly to belly superplex. Cena comes in to hammer on Joe but gets booted in the face. The Rock Bottom out of the corner looks to set up the Coup de Grace, only to have Joe and Balor get in an argument. An AA to Joe, an AA to Balor and another to Joe is good for an elimination at 18:05.

Angle comes in for the showdown with some history behind it and Cena gets taken down without much effort. Back up and Cena elbows him in the face, followed by initiating the finishing sequence. The Shuffle is reversed into the ankle lock but Cena slips out without much damage. The Angle Slam does a little more damage, to the point where Shane has to make a save. Balor drops the Coup de Grace and another Slam gets rid of Cena at 21:45.

We’re down to Orton/Shane vs. Balor/HHH/Angle/Strowman so Orton comes in, only to get forearmed by Balor. A trip to the floor lets Balor shotgun dropkick Shane into the barricade. Back in and the Coup de Grace misses again, setting up an RKO to get rid of Balor at 23:46. HHH is right there to jump Orton from behind but the backbreaker gets him out of trouble.

Cue Sami and Owens to beat Shane up but he fights them off with a chair, because OF COURSE HE CAN DO THAT. An RKO drops Owens….and Strowman is back up to come in again. The running powerslam is good for the elimination at 26:32 and Shane is worried, mainly because he’s alone against HHH, Strowman and Angle. Shane stands around forever before going in to face Strowman until HHH tags himself in. Angle tags himself in as well and gets taken down by a Russian legsweep.

Rating: D+. Yeah this still didn’t work a year later either. The first third is spent on showdowns that don’t mean anything and the rest is getting rid of the people who don’t matter so we can get down to the big stuff with Shane, HHH and Angle. You know, the older guys. The wrestling wasn’t the worst but it was long, didn’t feel important and came off more as a way to get to the ending instead of something worth seeing along the way.

Post match HHH is all smiley as Strowman stares him down. Strowman grabs him by the throat and says never do this again so HHH tries a Pedigree but gets powerslammed twice to end the show. This of course lead nowhere.

Overall Rating: B-. Much like last year, the show just felt long and brought down the good things they had going on. Now that being said, the good matches on the show were more than good enough to make up for the bad and the show is definitely worth seeing. AJ vs. Brock is more than good and the opener isn’t far behind. In other words, this Survivor Series is great if you take out the Survivor Series matches.

If nothing else, they’ve made me dislike Survivor Series, which used to be my favorite pay per view. This Raw vs. Smackdown story was pure annoyance with the announcers all suddenly being cheerleaders about a story that would disappear in a few days. It feels so manufactured and, because it’s WWE, they beat you over the head with it so hard that you’re waiting on the whole thing to finally end so you don’t have to hear about it anymore. Thanks for sucking the fun out of one of my favorite shows guys. It only took thirty years.

Ratings Comparison

Elias vs. Matt Hardy

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Kalisto vs. Enzo Amore

Original: D

Redo: D+

Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn vs. Breezango

Original: D+

Redo: D+

New Day vs. Shield

Original: B

Redo: B+

Team Raw Women vs. Team Smackdown Women

Original: D

Redo: C-

The Miz vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Usos vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: B+

Redo: B

AJ Styles vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Team Raw Men vs. Team Smackdown Men

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/19/survivor-series-2017-never-mind-the-talent-here-are-the-old-guys/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2003 (2018 Redo): Say Goodbye

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2003
Date: November 16, 2003
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 13,487
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

This is another big one and it’s also a one sided show. The Smackdown offerings are about as uninteresting as they could be while the Raw side looks at at least marginally better. This isn’t a great show on paper and I have a bad feeling that it’s going to be even worse as it actually takes place. Let’s get to it.

Here’s the go home episode of Smackdown if you need a recap.

The opening video talks about surviving things such as the game, evolution, and the battles in between. That’s all this needed to be, especially with Austin vs. Bischoff being the real main event.

Team Angle vs. Team Lesnar

Kurt Angle, Hardcore Holly, Chris Benoit, John Cena, Bradshaw

Brock Lesnar, Big Show, A-Train, Nathan Jones, Matt Morgan

Cena is out first and raps about burying everyone, meaning Lesnar and Show need a bigger graves. He’s still new at this team thing because he wonders if he can trade his partners in for a one night stand with Sable. Holly wastes no time and attacks Lesnar before the bell, sending him into the steps and trying a full nelson to break his neck. He also shoves a referee, and gets disqualified before the match even starts.

The bell rings and a Clothesline from Bradshaw ends A-Train in less than thirty seconds to tie it up. The chokeslam gets rid of Bradshaw as we’re not even a minute in yet. Good idea actually, as it’s not like Bradshaw and Holly were anything more than warm bodies anyway. Cena comes in but can’t FU Big Show and gets thrown into the corner as the four remaining members start working him over. A Throwback to Lesnar gets two but more importantly it allows the hot tag off to Benoit.

The chokeslam is countered into a Crossface (always looks cool) with Lesnar making a save. It’s off to an abdominal stretch as things slow down again. The standing legdrop gets two on Benoit and it’s time for some double teaming on the floor. Angle and Cena have finally had enough and go over to make a save but Benoit is beaten down even more. Morgan comes in for some lumbering offense but a suplex allows the hot tag to Angle. That means a series of suplexes as everything breaks down. The Angle Slam eliminates Morgan to tie us up at three.

Show clotheslines Jones by mistake though and an ankle lock gets rid of Nathan less than thirty seconds later. An F5 gets rid of Angle with the first count coming as Jones’ elimination is still being announced. We’re down to Benoit/Cena vs. Lesnar/Show and Brock goes shoulder first into the post.

A Crossface has Lesnar in trouble but he reverses into a cradle for two. Benoit won’t be denied though and slaps it on again, this time with Lesnar’s feet reaching the ropes. The third attempt makes Lesnar tap and we’re down to two on one. Benoit drops Show with a top rope shoulder for two so Cena adds a chain shot and the FU for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was too fast for the most part but the real problem comes from the fact that so many people were involved in the first place. This really could have been a six man elimination tag (A-Train as the third villain) and it would have been better, but that’s not how these things traditionally work. Cena and Benoit winning in the end is the right way to go as Cena’s rocket push is being assembled, but at the same time there’s a lot of work left to do. Benoit vs. Cena, which could still happen, would be a benefit for both guys and that’s a good sign for the future. Unfortunately it wasn’t the best present, but at least it wasn’t long.

Vince McMahon comes in to see Shane and talks about how tonight, father and son are facing two brothers. He thinks it’s almost spiritual and asks Shane how he feels about that. Shane only feels sorry for Vince. The boss leaves and runs into Austin, who starts laughing. Then he stops and gets serious before walking away. These two have great chemistry even if it doesn’t make the most sense.

JR explains the exchange.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Molly Holly

Lita is challenging after winning a #1 contenders match a few weeks back. Feeling out process to start as JR explains that these two have some contrasting styles. Lita gets knocked to the floor so Molly starts in on the back with some ax handles. We hit a dragon sleeper with Jerry liking her intensity. The handspring elbow in the corner keeps Lita in trouble and Molly stomps away.

A running corner clothesline rocks Molly and Lita rains down some right hands for her first real offense. Molly cuts her off with a side slam but Lawler would rather talk about Lita’s thong. A powerbomb out of the corner gives Lita a breather but the moonsault misses. The Molly Go Round gets two so Molly rips off a turnbuckle pad and sends Lita face first to retain.

Rating: D+. This was mainly Molly doing everything while Lita did a thing or two here and there. That’s not the most thrilling style in the world but Molly can be made into a good champion for a big name to take the title from later. Let her be built up for awhile instead of giving Lita the title immediately. It’s ok to wait now and then.

We recap Kane vs. Shane McMahon. Kane went nuts after losing his mask and after struggling to defeat Rob Van Dam, started tormenting Linda McMahon. Shane became the big star out of this because of course he did, including beating himself in a Last Man Standing match. Various attempted murders later set up this ambulance match, which is possibly the second most pushed match on the show.

Shane McMahon vs. Kane

Ambulance match with Shane charging straight at him for a crossbody to the floor. Shane knocks him onto the announcers’ table and hits him in the head with a monitor, setting up the big elbow to drive Kane through. That’s enough at ringside though so they head to the back, including the camera cutting out. That means we hit the pretape and come back with Shane pounding him down with a kendo stick.

Shane puts him in a security shack and jumps into an SUV to run Kane over again. Finding a well placed walkie-talkie, Shane tells someone to SEND IT, which means it’s time for an ambulance backstage. But is that the designated ambulance? That makes a difference you know. Instead of backing the ambulance up to the shack where Kane is down, Shane grabs a stretcher and wheels it twenty feet over, allowing Kane to grab him by the throat and slam Shane into a wall.

The camera goes out again and we pick it up with Kane knocking him back into the arena. Shane gets knocked into the front of the ambulance but manages to hit Kane in the face with the back door. What a sick sounding thud too. Kane is back up and sends Shane into the ambulance but another ram with the door gets Shane out of trouble. A tornado DDT on the floor plants Kane as they’re now near the grave for the Buried Alive match.

Shane puts a trashcan (good thing one was nearby) and a crashpad (same as before) and hits the Coast to Coast off the top of the ambulance to smash Kane’s face. That’s still not enough to wrap things up as Kane pulls Shane into the ambulance with him for more brawling. It’s Kane throwing Shane out though and then ramming him back first into the side. He javelins Shane’s head into the other side (you have to match you see) and a Tombstone on the floor is enough for the win.

Rating: D. This wasn’t as long as I was expecting but again, this doesn’t really do what they were likely shooting for with Kane. It makes two straight matches where Kane has had trouble beating up Shane McMahon. He can destroy Rob Van Dam but Shane gives him trouble? It didn’t work last time and it doesn’t work here. Now that he’s lost all of his heat though, you can pencil him in for a World Title match.

Brock Lesnar says he didn’t lose that match because his team lost it instead. Goldberg comes in for a staredown but Lesnar won’t wish him luck tonight. And so it begins.

Here’s the Coach, in a neck brace, for a chat. He assures his fans that he’s fine after the 3D from the Dudleys on Monday and he’ll be good to go soon. That seems to be it but hang on a second as Coach sees Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban in the front row. Cuban is ready to see Austin’s team win and insults referees of all kinds (he’s known for heavy criticisms of NBA referees). This brings out Eric Bischoff to invite Cuban into the ring, where a fight breaks out. Bischoff gets shoved down but here’s Randy Orton for an RKO to complete this waste of time.

Evolution is having a party with HHH in the middle of a good looking bunch of women. Ric Flair comes in to say they can have the champ later, which annoys HHH. Orton comes in, hits on the women, and brags about what he just did. Uh, congratulations?

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Los Guerreros vs. Basham Brothers

The Brothers are defending after Eddie won a handicap match to earn the shot. Eddie and Chavo waste no time in slugging away until Shaniqua offers a distraction to slow things down. That doesn’t seem to matter much to the cousins as Eddie works over Danny to start things off. A dropkick gives Chavo two and there’s a headscissors/armdrag combination from Eddie to put both champs down.

Some double teaming (described by Cole as “classic Bashams”) takes over though and Shaniqua gets in a slam on Eddie for good measure. Back in and Eddie gets stomped in the corner, followed by a double vertical suplex for two. Eddie gets free with a headscissors and hands it back to Chavo, who is double flapjacked in short order. Chavo fights up but Twin Magic takes him down again. Everything breaks down and Chavo slams Shaniqua, followed by a quick spanking. That’s NOT cool with the champs so Doug grabs a rollup with Chavo’s tights to retain.

Rating: D+. Another TV level match here with Los Guerreros coming up short again as we get closer to their inevitable split. The Bashams aren’t a great team (though they have apparently have a classic period) but they’re serviceable for something like this. Get rid of the dominatrix stuff though as it’s not working, isn’t funny and makes Shaniqua look like the important part of the team, which misses the point entirely.

Replays show Chavo kicking Eddie down by mistake, meaning this is far from over.

JR doesn’t think Austin can handle this trusting people stuff and has never seen Austin this angry.

We recap Team Austin vs. Team Bischoff. They’re running the show together but Austin isn’t allowed to attack people at will anymore. On top of that, a lot of people are accusing him of ruining the show through his various antics. That doesn’t sit well with Austin, so it’s time for a winner take all match with the winner getting to run Raw on their own. The idea is Austin has to trust people, which goes against everything he believes in.

Team Austin vs. Team Bischoff

Austin: Shawn Michaels, Dudley Boyz, Booker T., Rob Van Dam

Bischoff: Scott Steiner, Mark Henry, Christian, Chris Jericho, Randy Orton

Coach, Stacy Keibler and the two team captains are at ringside. The fans want tables to start but have to settle with D-Von and Christian instead. D-Von shoulders him down to start but gets slapped in the face, triggering a bunch of right hands to the head. That’s not a nice response. Van Dam comes in for some forearms to the face and a kick to the jaw gets the same. It’s off to Jericho for some more luck, followed by Steiner whipping Van Dam hard into the corner to set up some posing.

Van Dam’s comeback is cut off by a belly to belly superplex but he’s able to get over to Booker for the hot tag. Things speed way up in a hurry and the scissors kick into the Spinarooni makes Bischoff face palm. Everything breaks down in a hurry and Steiner hits Booker low. The Recliner goes on but Stacy offers a distraction, setting up a reverse 3D. A Bookend is enough to get rid of Steiner and make it 5-4.

The World’s Strongest Slam gets rid of Booker a few seconds later to tie it right back up. Bubba comes in to try his luck and is sent hard into the corner. D-Von’s help doesn’t make things much better as the Dudleys are rammed together. Mark misses a charge though and it’s a 3D into the Five Star for the elimination. It’s off to Orton for a hard clothesline on Van Dam but Rob scores with a kick. Another Five Star is loaded up but Jericho makes a save, setting up the RKO to tie things up at three each. Jericho comes in and missile dropkicks D-Von down as JR and King wonder how things will go tomorrow night.

D-Von shoulders Jericho down for no count as Christian has the referee, setting up the sleeper drop for another elimination. This match is already better paced than the opener and here’s Shawn to pick things up all over again. Shawn pounds on Jericho in the corner and catches an invading Christian without much effort. Orton gets in a dropkick but stays down anyway as I guess he didn’t hit all of it. A double tag brings in Christian and Bubba with a backdrop getting two on the Canadian.

Jericho runs Christian over by mistake but a low blow sets up the Unprettier to get rid of Bubba. We’re down to Shawn vs. Christian/Jericho/Orton and Austin is starting to see how much trouble he’s in. Shawn punches away at Christian to start but some good old fashioned double teaming has Shawn in trouble again. Like there’s any other way this should go. Shawn is taken outside and catapulted into the post (you can see him blade on the wide shot) to bust open a GUSHER.

That and a suplex are only good for two back inside and Christian even steals his pose. Jerry: “That was a creepy little pose right there.” The Unprettier is broken up and a quick Sweet Chin Music gets rid of Christian. A frustrated Jericho comes in and gets two off a clothesline before handing it back to Orton. Shawn gets in a belly to back suplex but Jericho comes back in to take over again. As usual, JR is perfect at calling this kind of a story and Shawn getting two off a DDT has Jerry trying as hard as he can to believe in Shawn.

The Lionsault hits knees and Shawn pulls himself up but gets pulled into a Walls attempt. That’s reversed into a quick small package to get rid of Jericho and make it one on one (Lawler: “I BELIEVE I BELIEVE!”). Jericho isn’t gone yet though and caves Shawn’s head in with a chair shot. Why that isn’t a DQ on Orton isn’t clear but Shawn is done as Orton comes back in.

That’s only good for two and you can see the sigh of relief from Austin. Orton’s high crossbody hits the referee and here’s Bischoff to break up Sweet Chin Music. That’s too much for Austin so it’s a Stunner to Orton but he makes the mistake of beating on Bischoff a bit too much. They go up the aisle and here’s Batista to powerbomb Shawn, giving Orton the final pin.

Rating: B+. I love this match and always have. It doesn’t really pick up until Shawn is on his own but that’s what he’s done best throughout his entire career. He knows how to play the underdog better than anyone I’ve ever seen and you really can get behind the Lawler mindset of trying to believe here. As usual, Shawn is great in this role and it’s never too far to believe that he could pull this off (quick superkick, small package for two eliminations). Great stuff, but you might want to skip the first few minutes.

Austin is stunned at the loss because he placed his career in someone else’s hands and was let down. The bloody Shawn can barely stand and Austin congratulates him for giving it everything he had. Austin grabs the mic and talks about starting here in Dallas and going out here as well. Coach comes out to laugh and gets beaten up one more time with security getting the same treatment. Beer is consumed as a final goodbye. You know, assuming you believe that he’s gone for good this time.

We recap Undertaker vs. Vince McMahon. Undertaker wants the title one more time but Vince screwed him over at No Mercy. Therefore Undertaker wanted a Buried Alive match here, because that’s where you go from here. Vince then went into this weird spiritual thing, which really didn’t work or accomplish much.

Tazz’s key for Vince’s victory: AVOID THE HOLE! Good advice.

Vince McMahon vs. Undertaker

Buried Alive and Vince drops to a knee in prayer before the match. Undertaker punches him down to start and the beating is on in a hurry. Vince is already bleeding less than thirty seconds in as this is going to be one sided for a long time. The beating continues until Undertaker crotches him on the post to switch things up a bit. More low blows keep Vince in trouble and it’s time to go to the floor with Undertaker choking with a cord. Completely one sided so far, as you probably guessed.

Cole and Tazz try to explain the idea of Vince being punished for his sins, which I’m guessing are mainly about Stephanie. I mean, almost everything else is. Vince is thrown over the announcers’ table and it’s time to go to the grave. Well just Undertaker at this point and he comes back with a shovel. One heck of a shot to the head rocks Vince again and Cole declares it over. So much for Undertaker’s hot streak.

Vince’s ankle gets crushed by the steps and NOW it’s time to head to the grave. Vince finally throws some dirt in the eyes (his first “offense”) and a low blow keeps Undertaker in trouble. A shovel to the head puts Undertaker in the grave….for a few seconds. He pulls Vince in and goes to the front loader to drop the dirt but gets cut off by lightning. Cue Kane to beat up Undertaker and bury him (again) to give Vince the win.

Rating: D-. So yeah LOLVINCEWINS because of course he does. There was nothing to see here unless you like Undertaker destroying people and then having a surprise ending. The announcers treated this like Undertaker’s last match, because if there’s one thing Undertaker is known for, it’s going away for good. It’s more of a match than an angle, and there’s no way that’s how Undertaker is going out. Bad match but moderately entertaining beatdown.

Cole and Tazz are SHOCKED.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Goldberg won the title last month so HHH put a $100,000 bounty on his head. Batista returned and collected by breaking Goldberg’s ankle so tonight it’s about revenge and the title. There’s not much of a reason for this to main event but would you expect much else? Well save for Vince maybe?

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Goldberg

Goldberg is defending and is coming in with a bad ankle. HHH is looking as out of shape as I’ve seen him in years, probably due to his bad groin injury. Hang on a second though as Goldberg has to quickly dispatch Flair to make it a little more fair. They head outside in short order with Goldberg hammering away but the ankle gives out on a gorilla press attempt.

A chop block takes Goldberg down and we hit the meat of the match. Flair is back up as HHH sends Goldberg outside, meaning a distraction sets up a chair to Goldberg’s ankle. There’s another chop block back inside and the slow leg work continues with Flair getting in a few shots of his own. A knee drop keeps the ankle in trouble and we hit a half crab. At least he knows his low level submissions.

Goldberg grabs the rope and fires off some right hands to little avail. A limping clothesline works a bit better as Flair is beside himself. HHH takes him down again and calls for a Figure Four, only to be kicked into the referee. That means brass knuckles for a very near fall and HHH beats up the referee again. The sledgehammer is brought down but Goldberg kicks him down with the bad ankle.

Flair’s latest attempt at interfering gets him slammed off the top (JR: “It hasn’t worked in thirty years.”) and Goldberg grabs the hammer. A shot to the ribs drops Flair and an invading Batista and Orton are quickly dispatched as well. The Pedigree is blocked and Goldberg picks up the hammer again but throws it down. Instead it’s a spear and Jackhammer to retain the title like a real man.

Rating: D+. Well if you’re a fan of HHH working the ankle, have fun. Goldberg looks strong, but there have been so many other big matches tonight that this isn’t the strongest way to end things. I’ll give them points for giving Goldberg a push, but you’re crazy if you think HHH isn’t getting the title back within the next month. Just a messy brawl, but it could have been much worse. At least HHH didn’t need fifteen minutes of working the leg.

Overall Rating: C-. There’s some good and bad stuff on this show but the bad wins out in the end. Between the weak main event, not great opener and pretty terrible Vince vs. Undertaker match, there’s not enough to put with Shawn’s amazing performance. This was better than I was expecting though and that’s a nice relief. Both shows need something fresh on top and it actually seems to be happening on Smackdown. I’ll take one out of two, especially at this point in time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989 (2018 Redo): They’re Trying Something

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 1989
Date: November 23, 1989
Location: Rosemont Horizon, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 15,294
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

This was one of two options for me to redo this year and since I did the 1996 show just two years ago and this is my favorite era, it wasn’t all that hard of a choice. It’s actually an interesting show as there are a few experiments taking place which could make for something fun to watch. Let’s get to it.

We open with the Saturday Night’s Main Event style promos from people on the show. This is already off to a cool start.

Hulk Hogan is happy that he’s healthy, but also for his team of Hulkamaniacs at the Survivor Series. I’m very glad he pointed out the name of the show we’ve paid to see.

Ted DiBiase is happy that he’s rich.

Jake Roberts is happy for the DDT.

Demolition is glad that they don’t have to fight each other. Fair point.

Randy Savage and Sherri are happy that he’s the only man worthy of being the Macho King.

Jim Duggan loves the USA. Sounds like a run of the mill day for him.

Dino Bravo is glad to have the Earthquake on his side.

Dusty Rhodes likes his polka dots.

Big Boss Man likes dishing out justice.

Brutus Beefcake likes wrestling, strutting and cutting. I wonder in what order.

Rick Martel is glad for his good looks.

Rick Rude is thankful for his ravishing body. Narcissism must run in the Rick family.

Roddy Piper is thankful for not being Ricky Rude.

The Genius….I think you can guess this one.

Mr. Perfect for being perfect. Kind of one dimensional no?

The Bushwhackers are glad for stuffing in turkey. Freaks.

Bobby Heenan is thankful for spending time with his family. The HEENAN Family that is.

The Ultimate Warrior for intensity. I’m stunned.

Vince McMahon narrates a card rundown. There’s something so weird about him being the voiceover guy. I miss those squares that show the match participants. Oh and team names other than Team Insert Name Here. You can’t think of some alliterative name? Like Rotten Writers?

One thing I’m thankful for: that the dark match was dark. This night got started with Boris Zhukov beating Paul Roma. I wouldn’t wish that on Vince Russo.

Enforcers vs. Dream Team

Big Boss Man, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel, Honky Tonk Man

Dusty Rhodes, Brutus Beefcake, Red Rooster, Tito Santana

As usual, this is mainly about the captains, but at least we get some Jive Soul Bro and Brutus Beefcake music, because the 80s were that awesome. Actually almost everyone involved here had great music. Again, the 80s were awesome. Dusty even has Boss Man’s nightstick because stealing things is part of the American dream. Tito and Honky Tonk start things off because Tito vs. Martel on pay per view wasn’t allowed for some reason. An early armbar has Honky Tonk in trouble but a cheap shot allows Martel to come in.

The pace picks way up as they run the ropes and Martel scores with a dropkick. Tito is right back with an atomic drop into a rollup for two so it’s off to Boss Man, who gets armdragged in a hurry. Dusty comes in and you can feel the energy go up. I’m not the biggest fan but that man had more charisma than almost anyone ever. With the dancing jabs out of the way, Brutus comes in and gets pounded down by Boss Man.

Honky Tonk misses a right hand so it’s back to Martel for a backbreaker. Some knees to the back don’t do much so it’s off to Rooster as it becomes clear how much better the names were back then. Boss Man, Dream, Model, Bad News, Brutus and….well ok there was no saving Rooster. Speaking of Rooster, it’s his turn to get beaten up by a revolving door of villains. Ventura is right there talking about how the size difference is working against Rooster, almost like he’s a real analyst.

A sunset flip finally gets two on Honky Tonk and a collision puts both guys down. That’s enough for the tag off to Tito for some serious house cleaning but it’s too early for the Figure Four. Martel slams him down and misses his elbow that always misses. Tito grabs a rollup but Martel reverses into one of his own and a grab of the trunks (not sure how much that would help here) gets rid of Santana at 9:15.

Dusty comes in and we cut to a shot of a “fan”, who will later be named Sapphire. Considering she hasn’t been officially introduced yet and would be gone just after Summerslam 1990, it’s kind of remarkable that she was only around for about nine months. Anyway Martel gets taken down with a dropkick and the big elbow gets two. It’s back to Rooster for what looks like some dancing and a headlock, which is quickly countered into a backbreaker.

The bearhug from Boss Man has Rooster in even more trouble until he bites his way to freedom. Boss Man tags Bad News (again, great names) but he doesn’t want to come in, meaning Rooster has to pull him in. Ever the serious one, Bad News isn’t about to have any of this stupid gimmick and beats the heck out of Rooster.

Boss Man comes in without a tag and accidentally hits Bad News. Oh dear I don’t see this going well. Before Bad News can use them all as floss, he walks out on his teammates and is counted out at 15:30. The melee allows Brutus to come back in and hammer on Boss Man until an elbow to the jaw cuts him down. Honky Tonk comes back in for two off a belly to back suplex and shrugs off some right hands (90% of Brutus’ offense). He can’t shrug off the high knee (5%, along with the sleeper for the remaining 5% as Brutus wasn’t exactly versatile) and it’s 3-2 at 17:24.

Martel comes in next and chinlocks Brutus down, followed by a backbreaker to put Brutus on the apron. Brutus comes back in with a sunset flip though, and after Martel gets caught grabbing the ropes, Boss Man is on his own at 20:13. Rooster comes in (Dusty is kind of a lame partner) and tries some forearms, only to get caught in the Boss Man Slam for the elimination at 21:00. Now Dusty is willing to come in for the big right hands and Brutus adds some chops. Boss Man is rocked so Dusty comes in with with a crossbody for the final pin at 21:59.

Rating: C-. It was dull at times, but there’s only so much you can get out of some of these people. Honky Tonk was past his expiration date, Rooster was Rooster, Brown was barely involved, Tito vs. Martel should have been its own match, and Dusty was only in there for a little while. The match wasn’t bad and it was a good way to start things off, but there were only two feuds of note in the whole match.

Post match Slick throws Boss Man the nightstick and it’s a heck of a beating for Dusty and Brutus. Dusty even gets handcuffed and beaten down on the ropes, drawing some blood. Well….were you expecting anything else from him? Brutus finally makes the save with the clippers.

In the back, Boss Man says Dusty is his prisoner. Well your prisoner is currently in the middle of a big arena and being let out of handcuffs. I see why Boss Man left the prison job.

Jim Duggan, Ronnie Garvin, Bret Hart, Hercules

Randy Savage, Canadian Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Greg Valentine

Bret comes in to work on the arm and Duggan sends said arm into the buckle. It’s off to Hercules for some forearms on the also legal Bravo but Earthquake comes in, runs him over, and hits the Earthquake for the elimination at 3:57. Duggan tries his luck with some shoulders that have no effect, so Bret gets behind Earthquake to trip him down on a third try. Garvin comes in and I suddenly want to see Earthquake crush him like a grape.

The Court starts taking turns on Garvin, including a top rope ax handle from Savage. A quick backslide gets two on Bravo but it’s already back to Savage for the snap jabs in the corner. Valentine comes back in though and since we’re not ten minutes into the match yet, Duggan makes a blind tag and clotheslines him out to even things up at 7:32.

Savage comes in and snaps Duggan’s throat across the top rope and it’s back to Earthquake for some forearms to the back. The Court is certainly making good tags to take their turns. Earthquake misses the big elbow so it’s off to Garvin to chop and headbutt Bravo. There’s the Garvin Stomp (it’s stupid when Randy Orton does it too) but Bravo rakes the eyes to break up the Sharpshooter.

It’s off to Hart vs. Savage and Randy PANICS as the crowd really wakes up. You better believe those Bret pops were being noticed, even if it took two years to get to the solo run. Savage gets taken down and runs off for the tag to Bravo so Bret beats him up instead. Garvin comes in again and is IMMEDIATELY side suplexed for the elimination at 11:18. I never get over how much Garvin absolutely sucks. He just got pinned clean by DINO BRAVO. What in the world does that say about your career?

Duggan hammers on Earthquake again before handing it back to Bret for a matchup I never knew I wanted to see. Bret wants Savage though and Jesse, a big fan of both guys, is rather pleased by these developments. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Duggan, ever the All-American, chokes behind the referee’s back. A missed knee drop makes things even worse for Savage and Bret gets two off a backbreaker. Bret misses the middle rope elbow (a regular one as he didn’t have his signature version down yet) though and it’s back to Bravo for the bearhug.

It’s back to Earthquake for some choking and a two count with the fans being rather pleased by the kickout. Bret avoids a Savage charge to send him into Bravo though and now the hot tag brings Duggan back in. For reasons of temporary insanity (or maybe sanity in his case), Savage drives Duggan into his own corner so Hart can tag himself in. A quick missed charge hits the post though and Bravo adds a shoulder breaker, setting up Savage’s elbow for the elimination at 19:07.

So it’s Duggan alone against Bravo, Earthquake and Savage, meaning Jim is looking completely fine. Earthquake unloads on him in the corner and the level of fine is starting to come down. Duggan beats up all three of them without much effort (Behold the power of AMERICA! Ignoring that Savage is from AMERICA of course!) and tosses the whole team outside.

As the announcers try to figure out who is legal, Earthquake comes back in and drops the big elbow for two. Savage hits the ax handle but misses the running crotch attack. Since the guys kind of suck at this, Sherri low bridges Duggan to the floor and it’s a countout at 23:25 to finish Duggan off.

Rating: D+. The strange ending aside (Duggan can’t take a pin here? Not even 3-1 with the new big monster and RANDY SAVAGE on the other team?), this wasn’t all that thrilling of a match. Other than the fans going coconuts for Hart, it was a lot of punching and kicking and very little more. It also wasn’t the biggest surprise, as any team with Hercules and Ronnie Garvin on the team and JIM DUGGAN as the brains of the operation is in serious trouble.

Dusty Rhodes is very hurt but Gene Okerlund is sure that he’ll be dishing out Americana soon enough.

The Genius has a poem saying he’s smart and how stupid the fans are. That’s such a simple gimmick but it’s one that would work so well today. Give him a guitar and he’s basically Elias with a better vocabulary.

Million Dollar Team vs. Hulkamaniacs

Ted DiBiase, Powers of Pain, Zeus

Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts

I’m not going to explain Zeus in full again because it just makes my head hurt. You know what doesn’t make my head hurt? The most awesome Survivor Series team in the history of the planet. I mean seriously, Hogan, Roberts and Demolition. Someone please try to find something that matches that level of amazing so I can point at you can call you stupid.

Just in case it’s not enough yet, the villains won’t let them in the ring (Jesse: “Count all four of them out!”) so Jake throws Damien in, because the most awesome Survivor Series team in the history of the planet has A BIG FREAKING SNAKE TOO! Still one of my favorite moments ever and something I still throw on if I need a smile.

Zeus wants Hogan to start so Gorilla goes into his weird questions about what the Z on Zeus’ head is for. Like….what else do you think it’s for? He’s a big Zorro fan? I mean, he should be because Zorro is so awesome that he would be first on the list if this team ever needed a fifth man but I still don’t get that rant. Hogan of course can’t hurt Zeus to start as the right hands and clotheslines have no effect.

A jumping knee does nothing so Hogan rakes the eyes and gets in a slam, which does all the damage of a standard slam. Zeus pops up and cranks on Hogan’s neck, in a spot that the Giant would use to put him on the shelf for weeks in WCW. A bunch of choking and a shove of the referee are enough for the DQ to get rid of Zeus at 3:20.

Zeus won’t stop choking and it takes the combined forces of the Powers of Pain and DiBiase offering money to get him off. Hogan is mostly dead so DiBiase comes in to drop some knees. More choking keeps Hogan in trouble but he finally gets a boot up in the corner and brings Jake in. The beating begins in a hurry and it’s off to Demolition for the rapid fire pounding to the back (I could watch that for at least a minute). Hulk is fine enough to come back in for a middle rope ax handle as Gorilla goes on about the Z on Zeus’ head again.

DiBiase elbows Ax in the face and brings in Warlord because the Powers of Pain vs. Demolition is still a thing a year after it was a bigger thing at the previous year’s show. A clothesline gets Ax out of trouble but Mr. Fuji trips him up, allowing Warlord to drop a headbutt for the pin at 9:52.

It’s off to Hogan to beat up Warlord in a match you would think would have happened at some point. Jake comes in and the fans want the DDT but have to settle for Smash hitting an ax handle to the back instead. Not quite the same thing. Barbarian kicks him in the face though and it’s DiBiase coming back in with a middle rope ax handle (the most popular move on the show).

The falling punch (still cool) gets two and we hit the chinlock. DiBiase misses the middle rope falling elbow (as always) but Smash still won’t tag for no apparent reason. Barbarian tags himself in and takes Smash’s head off with a top rope clothesline for the elimination at 13:44. Jake comes in but can’t DDT Barbarian no matter how many times he tries. The beating continues as Hulk is dying for a tag.

Some knee drops and a piledriver get two on Roberts but Barbarian misses the Swan Dive. There’s the hot tag to Hogan (Jesse: “Uh oh.”) and it’s time to clean house. The rapid elbows and a suplex give Hogan two (you don’t see him getting many near falls) and he clotheslines both Powers down. They pop back up and hit a spike piledriver….for a double DQ at 19:51, sending Jesse over the edge in an awesome rant. And yeah, that’s completely bogus, especially with Hogan and Roberts now having a 2-1 advantage over DiBiase.

The Million Dollar Dream has Hogan in trouble and Roberts has to save Hogan at two arm drops (Jesse: “THAT’S THREE TIMES! THREE TIMES! HOW COME ROBERTS WASN’T DISQUALIFIED???”). Hogan fights out of another attempt and punches DiBiase out of the air (because he was trying ANOTHER ax handle). The latest hot tag brings in Roberts for a neck snap across the top rope, giving us another great DiBiase sell.

Cue Virgil with his bad hand so Roberts beats him up too, including a DDT to a big pop. With Roberts down, DiBiase gets in the fist drop and throws his feet on the ropes to get rid of Jake at 23:42. Hogan is still down from the Million Dollar Dream so DiBiase picks him up and hits a clothesline for two. A chinlock goes on and Hogan slaps DiBiase’s arm, which would be shocking to see today. The comeback gives us a double clothesline but Hogan is up first and hits exactly what you would expect to set up the legdrop for the pin at 27:32.

Rating: C-. I love the face team but my goodness they picked a really weird way to get to the finish here. Hogan and company were either even or ahead for most of the match and Hogan just wins with ease in the end. What’s a better way to go here: the usual, or Zeus, who Hogan is feuding with at the moment, wrecking Hogan so badly that DiBiase pins him to set up a title program with DiBiase down the line? I wasn’t feeling this one, but the energy (and Jesse ranting) helped it a lot.

Jesse is LIVID post match, saying the referee probably even disqualified Virgil too.

Savage and Zeus, who face Beefcake and Hogan in a cage match in a few weeks, are ready to take care of business inside the cage. Sherri waving her hands in the background for some reason is a little distracting.

Hogan comes in to Beefcake’s locker room and they’re ready to win in the cage. Sherri comes in and throws powder in their eyes so the beatdown can be on.

We run down the remaining two matches.

As intermission continues, Jesse talks about issues inside the Heenan Family, including pushing and shoving in the locker room.

The Rude Brood is ready to win tonight. Rick Rude talks about his great teammates, Mr. Perfect knows how to get rid of Jimmy Snuka and the Rougeau Brothers have been training extra hard.

Roddy Piper can’t get his team to quit eating before the match. I remember this from when I was a kid and it’s still bizarre.

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Rick Rude, Mr. Perfect, Rougeau Brothers

Roddy Piper, Jimmy Snuka, Bushwhackers

There’s no Heenan with Rude, playing up the issues in the Family. Perfect jumps Luke from behind to start so it’s already off to Butch for a bite of the leg. Piper and Snuka bite the arm and it’s back to Butch to bite the back for a second helping. Jacques comes in and nips up but stops for a hug from his brother. We settle down to Jacques flipping over Snuka but getting taken down by a flying headbutt. A chop keeps Jacques in trouble and Snuka….I want to say dances? With Jacques down, the Superfly Splash is good for the elimination at 4:01.

Rude comes in for a leapfrog and a hip swivel before handing it off to Perfect. A botched low bridge sends Perfect outside as the Brood can’t get anything going at all. Luke comes in for a snapmare on Perfect and Snuka punches him in the face. The fast tags continue with Butch coming in for a few knees to the back. Piper’s atomic drop knocks Perfect over for the tag to Raymond, whose backdrop is countered into a sunset flip for two. Raymond gets two off a superkick but Piper grabs a piledriver for the second elimination at 7:39.

Perfect is in next for a snapmare of his own on Piper but gets catapulted into the corner as only Perfect could do. Butch comes in for some near falls off some stomping but a single kick to the chest knocks him into the corner. That means it’s back to Piper for some right hands and a hip swivel at Rick as Perfect is turned inside out. Butch adds another bite but gets rolled up for the elimination at 10:45.

Piper is right back in for a rollup of his own and Snuka adds a top rope chop to the head. It’s Luke’s turn to hammer away and a headbutt to the ribs gets two. Perfect is able to make a tag but Rude gets punched out of the air. Not that it matters though as a kick to the ribs sets up the Rude Awakening to even things up at 12:14.

So now we can have the match that they wanted in the first place, which definitely sounds better. Rude chops Snuka down and throws in a hip swivel before handing it back to Perfect, who gets kicked in the face. It’s already back to Rude for a chinlock, which goes nowhere either so Perfect comes in and gets small packaged for two. You really can tell that the energy has gone out of the arena and they’re just going through the motions with this one.

A ramming of the heads puts Perfect and Snuka down (should have knocked Perfect silly) and there’s the double tag. They slug it out, which is never a good idea against Piper. The fight falls to the floor and it’s a double countout at 18:36. So we’re down to Perfect vs. Snuka with Perfect making the mistake of ramming Snuka’s head into the buckle. Dude have you ever watched a Snuka match? A dropkick puts Snuka on the floor but he’s right back in for a pinfall reversal sequence. Snuka’s high crossbody is reversed into a cover for two but it’s the PerfectPlex to finish him at 21:27.

Rating: D. I’ve never liked this match as it was basically a delayed start until we got to the match that they really wanted to do. It also doesn’t really advance anything as Snuka vs. Perfect wasn’t a feud and Piper vs. Rude is right where it was before. At least Perfect got the win though and that’s what really matters, because he should have been ready to move up into the main event.

Post match Snuka goes after Perfect and Genius but the smart (and perfect) villains get away.

The Rude Brood says to not worry about Heenan’s whereabouts and promise to celebrate the ravishing way.

The Ultimate Warriors are ready to go. Jim Neidhart laughs a lot, the Rockers are their usual confident selves, and Ultimate Warrior says they all have organ donor cards. My goodness imagine the drug bills.

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Ultimate Warrior, Rockers, Jim Neidhart

Andre the Giant, Arn Anderson, Haku, Bobby Heenan

Heenan is out there because Tully Blanchard failed a drug test and is leaving, never to wrestle in a national promotion again. The fight starts before Warrior even shows up but here he is to save Neidhart as the bell rings. Three clotheslines put Andre on the floor and it’s a countout at 27 seconds, which is totally different than Zeus being eliminated earlier. Anderson’s “DANG IT” face is great, as always.

We settle down to Anderson getting beaten up by anyone who can get their hands on him, including the running tackle in the corner from Neidhart. Andre finally gets up and staggers out, with the Rockers getting in a few cheap shots. Haku comes in for some forearms to the back and Heenan chokes in the corner as Jesse says he would take Heenan over Gorilla in a fight. Before Gorilla can freak out, Haku superkicks Neidhart for the elimination at 3:31.

Michaels comes in to pick up the pace with a monkey flip before it’s off to Marty to start on the arm. Marty’s crossbody is caught but Shawn hits the dropkick to the back for the near fall. It’s back to Anderson, who can’t get a suplex, but Haku comes in to make it a double suplex, which is caught by Shawn in a nice save. Double superkicks get two and it’s off to Warrior for a backdrop. Heenan refuses the tag (well duh) so Anderson gets caught in an armbar instead.

Anderson takes him down with a shot to the ribs, hands it off to Heenan for a kick to the ribs, and then comes back in when Heenan gets touched once. That was the only way to go and it’s worth a chuckle. Anderson beats the heck out of Jannetty and Haku adds a few shots to knock Jannetty silly. Heenan comes back in for some stomps on Jannetty and a knee drop….for the clean pin at 8:54.

Egads how far have you fallen when you’re losing clean falls to Heenan? It’s instantly back to Anderson, who gets caught in Warrior’s bearhug. A rake to the eyes gets Anderson out of trouble so Haku gets bearhugged as well. It’s off to Michaels, who gets sent outside so Warrior has to toss him back inside. Heenan’s front facelock doesn’t work so here’s Anderson again for some stomping in the corner. Shawn is back up and rubs Anderson’s face into the mat, blinding him so badly that he tries to tag Warrior.

A Rocket Launcher gives Shawn two but for some reason it wakes Anderson up enough to take over again and bring in Haku. That just means a missed charge though and Shawn gets rid of him with a high crossbody at 12:54, leaving us with Shawn/Warrior vs. Anderson/Heenan. Four Hall of Famers isn’t too shabby. Heenan is willing to come in and punch Shawn a few times but Warrior scares him into the corner.

Some running shoulders have Anderson in trouble but he sidesteps a charging Warrior to send him outside. Heenan goes up again and again comes back down. Now Heenan is willing to come back in but when the no selling begins, Heenan’s time in the ring quickly comes to an end. Anderson sends him into the corner but Heenan won’t tag in again, probably being as smart as he can. Warrior rams them together and hits the gorilla press into the splash to get rid of Anderson at 18:16.

for a shoulder and the splash for the final pin at 20:27.

Rating: D+. Heenan alone almost made this entertaining but there’s only so much that even he could do. The wrestling isn’t the point here and there’s nothing wrong with that. Warrior winning was never in doubt as his biggest challenge was eliminated in less than thirty seconds. Not a good match, but Heenan made it fun enough.

Post match Heenan staggers to the back, with Warrior running up behind him for one more clothesline.

A stills package ends the show to Warrior’s music.

Overall Rating: D. This one really didn’t work very well with a lot of punching and kicking matches and very little else. The storylines weren’t so much advanced as much as just storylines staying in one place. Having Hogan in the middle and Warrior in the main event was certainly an experiment but it was more odd than anything else. The energy goes away at the end of the third match and you can feel it being gone. I love it for the nostalgia, but there’s just not enough here.

Ratings Comparison

Dream Team vs. Enforcers

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: C-

King’s Court vs. 4x4s

Original: B+

2012 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team

Original: D-

2012 Redo: C

2018 Redo: C-

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Original: D

2012 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: D

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Original: C+

2012 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D+

2012 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D

My original reviews continue to amaze me.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/08/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1989-includes-a-bonus-review/

And the 2012 redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/10/28/survivor-series-count-up-1989-its-already-going-bad/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




WCPBTW Supershow 2018: It’s What They’re Going For

IMG Credit: WCPBTW

WCPBTW Memorial Weekend Professional Wrestling Super Show 2018
Date: May 26, 2018
Location: Pickaway County Fairgrounds, Circleville, Ohio

This is an indy show that a reader asked me to look at, and it turns out to be the same company that Jim Cornette had plugged for a long time. The company is (or at least was) owned by Bobby Fulton of the Fantastics and since they were my NWA tag team of choice, this could be interesting. I’m curious to see how something like this goes so let’s get to it.

I have no idea of any storylines, characters or anything else coming into this so if I miss something of note, please bear with me.

The ring announcer welcomes us to the show and I can barely understand a thing he is saying. Another man gets in the ring with him and the fans don’t seem pleased. Apparently that man is Bobby Fulton, who owns the promotion and says something about 41 years in wrestling. I really wish I could give you more than this but I can’t understand more than a word or two here or there. He either talks about how great the fans are or orders a spicy pasty with a used Honda.

Fulton brings out an older woman and asks for some applause for the armed forces (fair enough over Memorial Day weekend). Now he introduces his pastor for a prayer, followed by the National Anthem (Fan: “PLAY BALL!” Yeah I say it too so I can’t make a joke here). With that, and the presentation of a prayer shawl out of the way, we’re ready to go.

Iron Russian #1 vs. Luis Casanova

And yes the Russian is masked, as all proper Russians should be. Iron Russian #2 is outside as flag waver. The USA chants begin, despite Casanova being billed from the Dominican Republic. That’s one of those things that never works and wrestling fans keep doing it anyway. #1 hits a loud chop in the corner and the fans don’t seem pleased. He does it a second time and tries a third but this time Casanova knocks him outside with a single right hand. Serves the Commie right.

The Russian cheats to win a test of strength but Casanova forearms him down, meaning it’s time to talk to the referee again. Probably trying to get him to give up his voting rights. Casanova gets taken down again and the neck crank goes on, which of course brings him back to his feet like a real American. Or Caribbean. A sunset flip gives Casanova two but Nova is back with the choking.

Casanova is sent outside for some cheap shots from Russian #2 but is fine enough to hit a running clothesline. The Russian kicks him in the face for two more but does the “dive into the raised boot which could only have been done so he could dive into the raised boot” spot so Casanova can starts the comeback. Two clotheslines get two and an AA connects, but the other Russian comes up for a distraction. The first Russian uses a distraction to hit Casanova with a chain for the pin at 9:06.

Rating: C-. Perfectly watchable match here, though Casanova is a disgrace to America and his own country as he tries to milk some American fervor. Jim Duggan would be disgusted by this man. The Russians are as classic of a wrestling villain trope as you are going to get so this worked out fine. Dated, but fine.

Queen of the Ring American Grand Prix Title: Miss Hannah vs. Kacee Carlisle vs. Shawna Reed

Hannah is defending and they need to work on the name of the title. Carlisle has her own title but I’m not sure what it is. The challengers hug to start and go with the chopping and choking on the ropes. Based on that first minute or so, this doesn’t exactly appear to be the most polished women’s division ever. A double clothesline takes her down again and there’s a double back elbow to do the same.

They suplex the champ and now it’s time to argue over the cover because that’ show triple threat matches work. Hannah is sent outside though and Carlisa chokes Reed on the ropes. It works so well that she does it again before knocking Hannah back down and covering for two. A butterfly suplex (you don’t see that much anymore) gets the same on Reed but she gets up and drops Hannah again.

Reed side slams Carlisle for two and chokes in the corner before running the ropes for….a chinlock. Must be a Kevin Owens fan. A swinging neckbreaker connects and they’re both down again, meaning Hannah can come back in. We go old school with a double noggin knocker and some forearms to Reed in the corner. The handspring elbow misses and Reed puts her foot a good six inches in front of Hannah’s face for two. Reed’s cover is rather sloppy though and Hannah crucifixes her to retain at 7:58.

Rating: D+. This was as by the book of a triple threat match as you were going to find and the work wasn’t much better either. That being said, it doesn’t exactly seem like a promotion that focuses on its women’s division very much but this could have been worse. They didn’t go with something about the women’s looks and they got a little time so you can’t really complain all that much. Not great, but it could have been a lot worse.

Eric Fallen vs. Tyler Robinson

Richardson is in an American flag jacket and half of the Ohio State Tag Team Champions. We’re not ready to go yet though as Fallen’s other manager, carrying a cane, yells at Robinson and the fans. Grog promises to have Robinson’s hair shaved and we finally get the bell.

They go nose to nose to start with Fallen shoving him down as the manager with the cane yells at some fans. For some reason that makes Robinson take a bow before grabbing a wristlock. Some clotheslines into a dropkick into some armdrags into a clothesline put Fallen on the floor and Robinson hits a hard suicide dive. Back in and Robinson hits a springboard high crossbody for two but Fallen drops him with a single shot. They fight over arm control with Fallen getting him down with a top wristlock.

Some hard whips into the corner have Robinson in more trouble but he fights up and tries a Boston crab. That’s blocked without much trouble and Fallen throws him outside to yell at more fans. Back in and Robinson throws him hard into the ropes for a crash but Fallen is right back to the arm. Robinson fights up again (he does that a lot) and grabs a fireman’s carry gutbuster for his first near fall.

A jackknife cover gets him a ridiculously slow two so Fallen suplexes him for a pretty fast two of his own. Robinson tries the Boston crab again, drawing Grog up for the distraction. Fallen’s chokeslam hits for two but a second attempt is countered into a crosschin. That’s broken up with straight power and Fallen puts him on top, only to get shoved back down. Grog grabs the foot though and Robinson dives into a really bad chokeslam for two….but the referee remembers that he needs to count to three and comes back for the pin at 11:09.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what was up with the referee (felt like a plot point due to the speeds of the count) here but it was pretty distracting throughout the match. What mattered here though was I got most of the story they were going for and saw how things were supposed to go. If the wrestlers are telling their story properly, then you can figure out the details for yourself, so well done here.

Post match Robinson has to have his head shaved by….someone I don’t know. They take their time here and do the whole thing too and the referee talks trash about it. That would explain a thing or two from the match. Cue a guy in a hat to….I think yell at the referee but I can’t make out a word of what is being said. Robinson’s shave is done so he gets up and drops the referee, setting up a frog splash for the pin, counted by the guy in the hat. While we’re here, we might as well shave the referee’s head too. The guy in the hat fires the referee too. Dang bad night for him.

Iron Russian #2/Mr. Pittsburgh Stealer/Kevin Sullivan vs. Bill Dundee/El Rey Mascaras/Onyx

The Russian is in a Trump shirt for a funny sight gag (he was probably wearing it earlier too but it was a wide shot). Onyx is wearing a title and has an unnamed woman with him, while Dundee is in traditional trunks that he shouldn’t probably be wearing at 75 years old. We get the Big Match Intros and Onyx is the other half of the Ohio State Tag Team Champions.

Sullivan and Dundee lock up to start with Dundee punching him in the face to knock away Sullivan’s spike. Now the bell rings and they throw some pretty horrible looking punches in the corner with Dundee getting the better of things. The Russian comes in for some cheap shots but gets pulled down into a quickly broken armbar. It’s off to Onyx for a hard clothesline into a snap suplex but the Russian runs over Mascaras.

A dropkick puts the Russian down again but it’s off to the Stealer (yes Stealer) to work on Mascaras’ arm. The Stealer gets two off a big boot and an elbow is good for the same. Sullivan comes in to stay on the arm and it’s time to stay on the cheating from the villains. The Stealer grabs a chinlock but Mascaras is up in a hurry. Some running knees connect in the corner and it’s back to Onyx to throw Stealer around. Mascaras is back in with a sunset flip to pin Stealer out of nowhere 6:06.

Rating: D. That was a really weird one and I’m not sure what they were trying to do out there. I know Sullivan and Dundee (with the younger of them at 69 years old) can’t be doing much here with Mascaras being beaten down for a little while but then the good guys come back and win without much effort and out of absolutely nowhere. It was almost to the point where it seemed like the pin wasn’t supposed to take place there, which isn’t impossible.

Post match everyone looks a little confused so yeah maybe that wasn’t the planned finish. Hold on as Sullivan says that doesn’t count for some reason so we ring the bell again. Stealer hammers away on Mascaras but gets sunset flipped again for the pin in about 15 seconds. The villains attack again but this time Onyx cleans house.

Big Jim Hines Memorial Battle Royal

Onyx, El Rey Mascaras, Eric Fallen, Iron Russian #1, Iron Russian #2, Luis Casanova, Mecha Mercenary, Tony Crawford

Jim Hines is Bobby Fulton’s real name though since he’s alive, I’m going to assume it’s Bobby’s father or brother. The bell rings and the camera starts circling the arena for a rather weird view. The camera finally settles down to a still but somewhat wide shot as everyone chokes and teases eliminations on the ropes. Fallen is sent over the top but manages to save himself. Russian #1 is clotheslined out and Rey Mascaras is knocked out off camera.

Casanova charges at the rather large Mercenary and gets backdropped out as the eliminations have started in a hurry. Crawford is out at the same time and we’re down to four with Onyx, Mercenary, Russian #2 and Fallen. Make that three as Russian #3 charges at Onyx and is out in a hurry. Fallen charges at Onyx and is taken out as well, leaving us with the two big guys. Mercenary’s clotheslines don’t do much but Onyx’s big clothesline knocks him down. Onyx is knocked into the corner but ducks a charge to put Mercenary out for the win at 5:43.

Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t work, which isn’t exactly surprising. You can’t do much with an eight man battle royal with less than six minutes. If nothing else it doesn’t exactly make it seem all that important if they are going to get in an out of there that fast. Nothing to see here, but a battle royal is going to be a good way to draw some fans into the building.

We now pause for awards to be presented to Fred and Nick Curry (famous wrestler and I’m assuming his grandson, also a wrestler). They don’t actually get in the ring so I’m not sure how big of a deal this is.

Nick is ready for the match, which will be Bobby Fulton’s last match.

And now, here’s Jim Cornette with a plaque. He introduces Bobby Eaton, Fred Curry and James J. Dillon, who are all here to celebrate Bobby Fulton’s final match. Cornette brings out Fulton to give him the plaque, despite all of the horrible things that Fulton has done to him over the years. They have been friends for 37 years though and Fulton has always been a friend of wrestling.

Fulton’s family (I believe sons, including the guy with the hat) comes in with him and Cornette gives Bobby a plaque for forty years in wrestling. Bobby holds up the plaque and gives a speech which is drowned out by the applause. He has someone else get in and it looks a lot like Brian Pillman Jr. (who does live near Ohio and seems to have wrestled for the promotion). They all pose for a picture in a nice moment. There’s nothing wrong with a legends ceremony, especially with people who clearly care about Fulton like Cornette does.

FBI vs. 5 Most Wanted

5 Most Wanted’s Tag Team Titles (might be the Vendetta Pro Wrestling International Tag Team Titles) are not on the line. It’s Tracy Smothers/Tommy Rich for the FBI as ECW continues to live. The 5 Most Wanted are Sean Casey (OVW mainstay back around 2000/2001) and Cody Hawk (who trained Jon Moxley), with Shawna Reed, David J, Jon Murray and Tomi Angel, because the 5 Most Wanted has six people and we need two people named Tommy/Tomi in one match.

The FBI coming out to Stayin Alive is a lot more appropriate now that Smothers (who dances during his entrance) seems to be doing better with his cancer. Casey and Rich start things off and, after over a minute and a half of stalling, they lock up. Rich punches his way out of the corner and clotheslines an invading Hawk. It’s off to Smothers for two off a double back elbow but Hawk gets in a cheap shot from the apron, allowing the rest of the 5 Most Wanted to get in some choking from the floor.

Smothers gets beaten up in the corner but comes back with the karate, only to get knocked into the wrong corner again. Rich gets drawn in to keep up the double teaming but Smothers avoids a shot and brings him in legally. Everything breaks down and some right hands set up a double whip to send the Most Wanted into each other. Stereo rollups give the FBI the double pin at 4:53.

Rating: D. This was another hard one to watch as the FBI wasn’t exactly looking great, though to be fair this was about the nostalgia and fun entrance than anything else. Also, it wasn’t supposed to be anything more than a five minute punch and kick match. It was what I was expecting, but that doesn’t mean it was the easiest thing to watch.

Post match the FBI bails while 5 Most Wanted freaks out and then poses for a photo (seems to be their thing).

Here are Shane Douglas and Robby Starr with Shane talking about ECW and his history with Gary Wolfe. Shane injured Wolfe’s neck in ECW and caused him to be put in a halo for three months. Tonight, the beating will be even worse, even in this horrible town.

Shane Douglas vs. Gary Wolfe

Shane has Robby Starr in his corner and Ronnie Garvin is the guest enforcer on the floor (looking GREAT for 73 years old). This is billed as an ECW Unfinished Business match, making me wonder what the statute of limitations is on unfinished business. They shake hands to start but Wolfe cranks on the hand to send Shane bailing to the floor. Shane is sent into the apron and they fight into the crowd with Wolfe throwing a chair at him.

The camera loses them as they go to the other side of the building but we catch up with Wolfe throwing a trashcan at him and then sending Shane into various things. They get back in the ring for a change with Shane using the rope to get in a low blow and take over. The neck crank goes on Wolfe, followed by a camel clutch to mix things up a bit. Wolfe fights up with some headbutts but Starr grabs him. Shane almost crashes into him but manages to kick out of Wolfe’s rollup. Garvin knocks Starr cold to a big pop, leaving Shane to avoid a charge and grab a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin at 6:54.

Rating: D+. This was another rough watch but it was FAR easier than watching the guys in their 60s out there. These guys could still move around well enough to not embarrass themselves and I can’t even imagine some of the people on the roster having a match like this. It’s not good, but at least it was better than some of the other things on this show.

Abyss vs. Barbarian

Monster’s Ball and the pairing alone got my attention. Abyss is waiting with a stick but Barbarian throws a chair down because he isn’t scared of a monster. They slug it out to start and then trade shoulders. Barbarian clotheslines him to the floor where Abyss wins a fight and Barbarian gets chopped by a guy with a bowtie. Abyss gets held for some chops from fans but he reverses a whip to send Barbarian through some chairs.

Some golf club shots have Barbarian in trouble but he’s right back with the elbows. The crowd stands up so we can’t see everything going on until they get back inside. Abyss busts out Janice (board with spikes sticking out), which gets caught in the turnbuckle, as always. Barbarian kendo sticks him a few times but walks into a chair shot to the back. Another one to the head sets up a chokeslam onto the chair to give Abyss the pin at 7:47.

Rating: C-. Never let it be said that Barbarian isn’t willing to get in a brawl at his age. This wasn’t exactly revolutionary as has been the case for years with Monster’s Ball, but it is nice to see Barbarian in the ring again. There is something impressive about someone with a basic gimmick who has made it last for that long. You know what you’re getting with Barbarian (it’s right in the name) and it worked out fine enough here.

We have a raffle drawing for something.

Bobby Fulton vs. Nick Curry

Nick has his father (I think) Fred Curry with him while Fulton has a bunch of his family, including (I’m pretty sure) Brian Pillman Jr. This is billed as Fulton’s retirement match, which wouldn’t quite wind up being true but it’s a nice idea. Granted I’ll like anyone who comes out to Gonna Fly Now and then switches to Eye of the Tiger. Curry drops to the mat before getting back up for the lockup. Back up and they go with the grappling until Fulton grabs a headlock, followed by a few shoulders.

Rating: C. All things considered, this wasn’t too bad at all, with Fulton looking like he can still do all the basics. It also helps when the fans treat him like a major star, which is the most important thing you can have in a match like this. If the fans aren’t caring about your main event, you aren’t going to get much else out of the match, so it was nice to see the fans reacting to Fulton so strongly. Curry looked young but you can see how well trained he has been as he seemed perfectly comfortable out there.

Gary Wolfe/Robby Starr vs. Bobby Fulton/Nick Curry

Fulton beats up Starr to start and it’s quickly off to Curry to take him down. A hiptoss into a dropkick gets two on Starr and it’s time to bail to the floor. Fulton goes outside to post Wolfe and Nick slugs away at Starr. It’s back to Fulton but Wolfe gets in a cheap shot from the apron to put him down. A spinwheel kick puts Starr down though and the hot tag brings Nick back in to clean house. Fulton sends Wolfe outside, leaving Nick to crossbody Starr for the pin at 3:49.

Rating: C-. This was a lot better to watch than some of the other matches involving legends as they didn’t stay out there very long and Fulton can still move well enough. It helps that they had some others in there who could do some other things, as Fulton can only do so much on his own. It wasn’t a good match by any stretch, but it was quick and gave the fans what they wanted to see so not too bad.

Post match Fulton seems to have hurt his ankle and has to be checked on by the medics. Fulton gets back up for a THANK YOU BOBBY chant. Bobby thanks the fans and Nick Curry to a big reaction.

Fulton, with a customized title, thanks the fans and says he’s tired of young people disrespecting the business because it has been great to him for 41 years. Take care of the business because it isn’t going to take care of you.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a fine example of a situation where you need to remember what you were watching. This wasn’t WWE, AEW, Ring of Honor or anything close to it. The point here was a (mostly) family friendly wrestling show where you could probably take a family of four out to a 3+ hour show, get Cokes and hot dogs and be out for about $75. That’s not a bad night of entertainment and there was a little something for everyone.

The show had some legends who have probably been friends of Fulton for years and that’s all it needed to be. They weren’t trying to reinvent the wheel here and while the show wasn’t great, it did exactly what it was trying to do. It seemed to work out as well as there was a nice crowd around the show could have been MUCH worse. It’s not a great show or anything, but it was perfectly acceptable for what it was.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2018 (2019 Redo): The Man Comes Around

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2018
Date: August 19, 2018
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 16,169
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Jonathan Coachman

This time for sure, Summerslam edition! Yes believe it or not the main event is once again Roman Reigns challenging Brock Lesnar for the Universal Title because that hasn’t gotten old this year. Other than that….as usual I can barely remember anything on these shows as they run together so much. Let’s get to it.

Oh and due to the recent WWE Network update, I get to watch the Kickoff Show on YouTube. Well done with that one people.

Kickoff Show: Andrade Cien Almas/Zelina Vega vs. Lana/Rusev

Rusev is on fire at this point and it’s a battle of the wrestling pairs. Andrade gets Rusev to chase him and it’s right into the double Tranquilo pose. Rusev and Lana shout at them but Andrade gets in a cheap shot to break up the chase. That’s fine with Rusev, who stomps him down in the corner until Zelina offers a distraction. Andrade posts him like a good rudo, setting up the armbreaker over the ropes. An armbar takes us to a break and we come back with Vega pulling Lana off the apron to prevent the tag.

The reverse tornado DDT gives Andrade two and the armbar goes on again. Another reverse tornado DDT is countered with a forearm (keeping it simple can work) though and it’s the hot tag to Lana. A bulldog lets Lana dance up and the neckbreaker gets two. Vega sends her face first into the buckle but Lana breaks up the running knees with a kick to the head. Andrade makes sure the Accolade doesn’t go on with a well timed distraction though and Vega grabs a rollup with her feet…..as close to the ropes as she can get them for the pin at 7:02. That was pretty adorable with Vega trying to get there and not reaching.

Rating: D+. What happened with Rusev and Lana? I know I ask that a lot but egads man. They’re married in real life, Rusev has more charisma than he knows what to do with and Lana is the walking definition of a blonde bombshell who can talk. A year later they’ve basically disappeared and I would love to know why. At least Andrade is getting a push, and with as much talent as he has, there is no reason for him not to. The fans are properly fired up now so well done on the job, even if the match wasn’t great.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Drew Gulak vs. Cedric Alexander

Cedric is defending in the first of NINE title matches because WWE has too many times and doesn’t get why that is such a problem. Gulak’s friends Brian Kendrick and Jack Gallagher are barred from ringside. Feeling out process to start with Cedric taking him into the corner but having his headscissors blocked. The Gulock is broken up in a hurry and Cedric hits a dropkick to take things outside.

Gulak gets in a big boot on the way back inside and Cedric has banged up his neck. The neck crank goes on and we take a break. Back with Gulak’s continued logical offense, including some clotheslines and a chinlock. Gulak throws him over his back and pulls on the neck some more (close to a Gory Special) but since that can’t last long, Cedric is right back with a springboard Downward Spiral. With the wrestling not working, it’s time to hammer away at the head before sending him outside.

The big running flip dive hits Gulak again but he’s fine enough to break up a springboard. The Gulak over the ropes is half and half on the logical offense theme but the regular version can’t go on. A hard elbow to the head rocks Gulak, who comes right back with the biggest right hand I’ve ever seen him throw. The Neuralizer is countered into the ankle lock but Cedric rolls into a cradle for two. Cedric’s Spanish Fly is countered into a rollup for two, which is reversed into a stacked up rollup to give Cedric the pin at 10:43.

Rating: B-. This was the well done match that I was expecting, with Gulak going after the obvious target but not being able to finish off the more well rounded Alexander. Cedric was kind of a dull character but he is more than good enough to have a fast paced match like this. Gulak winning the title here would have been a good moment, but Cedric was hardly a bad choice for champion.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: B-Team vs. Revival

The B-Team is defending because WWE would rather laugh than go with a team they have invested so much in already. At least we get the B-TEAM B-TEAM GO GO GO entrance. Dallas headlocks Dawson down over but everything breaks down in a hurry with a shot to Dallas’ leg. The Shatter Machine hits the illegal Axel and a missile dropkick/spinebuster (Hart Attack variation) gets three straight twos on Dallas. More leg cranking takes us to a break and we come back with more leg cranking.

Dawson puts on a spinning toehold but gets kicked shoulder first into the post. Since Axel is still down (well done on making the Shatter Machine look awesome) though, it’s a backbreaker/middle rope knee for two more. Dallas grabs a hanging swinging neckbreaker on Wilder and now it’s back to Axel off the hot tag. Everything breaks down with the PerfectPlex being countered into a small package. Dallas shoves Wilder into the pile though and Axel winds up on top to retain at 6:12.

Rating: D+. This was the “let’s add a Raw match to the Kickoff Show because it’s for a title and people will care” theme and, as usual, it didn’t work very well. We’re three matches in and now the four hour Summerslam gets to start. It’s just one more thing added to the card that was completely forgettable and took a little bit more out of the fans. How does this make the night better?

Terry Crews is outside the Barclays Center and talks about the measure of success. You can feel the heartbeat in your chest to drive you and then you grind to find the moments that define success for you. Tonight, this is where dreams come true because all the world’s a stage. So what defines success and greatness and how bad do you want it? Go ahead and take a bow because we’ll let you take a bow because you’re about to bear witness to another great Summerslam. The things he was saying only kind of made sense, but sweet goodness that man can get you fired up for a show.

The CGI Empire State Building is over the ring again. You can’t see it live in the arena of course and that will mess you up when you see it on a monitor and not before your eyes.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Dolph Ziggler

Rollins is challenging with the freshly returned Dean Ambrose in his corner (because having him show up on Raw was far smarter than having him show up at Summerslam) to counter Drew McIntyre (because DOLPH ZIGGLER was the bigger prospect in 2018…..and kind of was in 2019 as well). As a bonus, Rollins is in Thanos inspired gear while Ziggler has a picture of the title over the front of his tights.

They go with the grappling to start with Rollins being backed up to the ropes, meaning it’s time for Ambrose to stare at McIntyre. The early superkick misses Rollins and Ziggler bails to the floor. That means a double staredown until Rollins throws him back in for some chops. Ziggler kicks at the leg to take over and we get a Flair Flip of all things. The chinlock goes on with Ziggler kicking the knee to keep Rollins down in a smart move.

Rollins’ comeback doesn’t last long as Ziggler backdrops him to the floor. Back in and Ziggler’s high crossbody is pulled out of the air but they crash to the floor again off of a suplex attempt (that’s always a scary looking spot). Back in again and Rollins gets two off a middle rope Blockbuster but Ziggler crotches him on top. Another superplex attempt is broken up and Rollins sends him outside for a suicide dive.

Rollins’ windup knee gets two but the buckle bomb is countered into a quickly broken sleeper. They fight to the apron with Ziggler kicking him into the post and nailing the DDT onto the apron for what should be a huge knockout. Since it’s this kind of a match though, it’s only good for two. Rollins hits him in the face again and gets his own two off the great looking frog splash.

Ziggler goes up top but Ziggler catches him with a reverse superplex into a reverse Falcon Arrow for a nice twist on the usual sequence. The fans give it a standing ovation so they seem to have some good taste. Hold on though as McIntyre sends Ambrose into the steps with the distraction letting Ziggler hit the Zig Zag for two. I blame the kickout on Cole declaring it over, which is the magical cure for a finisher. Rollins is busted open as he reverses a rollup into the buckle bomb. Dean gets back up and takes care of an interfering McIntyre, leaving Rollins to him the Stomp to get the title back at 22:02.

Rating: B. You don’t expect the opener to get this kind of time. The match was entertaining though it wasn’t quite the instant classic they were going for. It felt like the match was more of a collection of spots than a match that built on itself to get somewhere. That’s a great way to get an entertaining match and for what they were going for, I can certainly live with something like this. Maybe not the highest quality but very entertaining, which more or less defines Rollins.

Rollins and Ambrose celebrate a lot.

The Bellas are here to support their bestest friend ever Ronda Rousey, and to plug all their stuff of course. They might even get back in the ring at Evolution.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers

Big E. and Xavier Woods are challenging and it’s almost weird to see Kofi around a Tag Team Title match these days. Rowan wastes no time by spin kicking Woods in the face to start. Harper hits a big boot of his own and it’s off to the Gator Roll into the chinlock. A running splash from Rowan sets up the head vice as it’s total dominance to start. Big E. gets knocked off the apron and Woods is sent outside to join him, but Rowan can’t powerbomb Woods onto the steps.

A hurricanrana sends Harper into the steps and the hot tag brings in Big E. Belly to belly suplexes on the floor abound (with Harper landing on his head and thankfully not breaking something), followed by the Warrior Splash to Harper inside. Harper is right back with a Michinoku Driver but Big E. sends Rowan into the post. Woods hits a dive onto Rowan and Big E. spears Harper through the ropes.

Rowan is back up with his own dive off the apron to Big E. and things finally settle down a notch. Woods can’t complete a springboard tornado DDT as Harper reverses into a powerbomb for two, meaning it’s time for Kofi to play cheerleader. Apparently not a fan of cheerleading, Rowan plants Kofi but walks into the Big Ending.

Big E. Rock Bottoms Harper off the apron into what was supposed to be a backstabber from Woods, though it was more like Harper just landed on Woods’ legs. Eh can’t hit them all. Woods makes up for it by dropping the big elbow off the top to the floor and Harper is actually in trouble. UpUpDownDown is loaded up but Rowan hits Woods with the hammer for the DQ at 9:27.

Rating: B-. They didn’t play around here and went with the all action match, which was the right call here. Let them do whatever they wanted and have an entertaining match as a result. New Day was throwing everything they could against the unstoppable monsters and came close to getting a win. That’s the kind of hope spot you need over a team like the Brothers as you have to have a reason to believe something could happen in the future. That being said, it didn’t mean anything in the end as Rowan tore his bicep and New Day would win the titles in two days.

Post match the Brothers destroy New Day with the hammer.

Jon Stewart is here.

We recap Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman. Owens said he was on a role and tried to get Strowman’s help to win Money in the Bank. Strowman didn’t like it when Owens inevitably turned on him and threw him through a bunch of tables before winning the briefcase. The Strowman destroyed Owens’ car and put him in a portable toilet, which he knocked off the stage. Owens “beat” Strowman in a cage match when Strowman threw him off a cage so now it’s a rematch for the Money in the Bank briefcase.

Money In The Bank Briefcase: Braun Strowman vs. Kevin Owens

Strowman is defending and can lose the briefcase by losing in any way. An early pair of running splashes in the corner sends Owens outside and Strowman runs him over again. Owens’ superkick just makes Strowman angrier and it’s a chokeslam onto the ramp. The running powerslam finishes Owens at 1:55. Well that worked and makes Strowman look like the monster, but HAHA if you actually thought they would put the title on him.

Clip of a Be A Star rally.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match. Carmella cashed in Money in the Bank at the Smackdown after Wrestlemania and has been put over one name after another, though she is still seen as in over her head. Becky Lynch has been trying to get back to the top and is getting the shot here. Then Charlotte saved Becky from a beatdown and got a match where she could be added to the match if she won. Since it’s Charlotte, OF COURSE she was added in, which Becky saw as someone else trying to steal her chance. Charlotte did get in a good line with Carmella “is a Diva living in a woman’s world.”

Smackdown Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte vs. Carmella

Carmella is defending and we get the Big Match Intros, with the hometown champ not being well received. As I continue to not understand why the title belt is shown inside what looks like the Elimination Chamber during the graphic, the bell rings and Carmella starts running her mouth. Charlotte gets sent outside so Becky can hit a running legdrop but the second misses.

Carmella isn’t happy with Charlotte breaking up the cover but it’s time to get crafty. She slaps Becky in the head and blames Charlotte, who says she’s innocent as they knock Carmella to the floor. Becky and Charlotte trade rollups and it’s a standoff for some applause. An armbar puts Charlotte down for all of two seconds but Carmella is back in because she can’t just go away.

Becky gets sent into the steps so Carmella can shout and dance a lot. Charlotte is whipped down as well and Carmella takes Becky inside for, you know it, more shouting. She does even things out a bit with a chinlock until Charlotte comes back in, only to be taken down by the hair. Now it’s Charlotte getting chinlocked as we see the wide range of Carmella’s offense. Becky makes her own save, gets dropkicked down, and Carmella shouts about being champion again. How can she be repeating stuff that many times less than six minutes into a match?

Carmella mocks Becky’s pose and ducks a shot from Charlotte, which hits Becky instead. Some fall away slams drop Carmella and Charlotte nips up but Becky knees her in the face. A double missile dropkick puts Carmella and Charlotte down again with Charlotte being sent outside. Becky gets caught on top for a hurricanrana to give Carmella two, leaving herself open to Charlotte’s spear.

Since we can’t go that long with Carmella being on defense, she knocks Charlotte into the corner and shouts that no one cares about her anymore. Another hurricanrana out of the corner is countered into a Boston crab (with Charlotte driving her down from the corner almost like a Styles Clash) before switching to the Figure Four. That’s broken up with Becky’s top rope legdrop and they’re all down.

Becky gets up first and hammers on Carmella, who of course knocks her outside because SHE IS THE CHAMP. A rather hard suicide dive hits Becky but it’s Charlotte coming off the top with the moonsault, which goes right between them and barely makes contact, as usual. Back in and Carmella breaks up the Disarm-Her so Becky gets two off a Rock Bottom, with Carmella making ANOTHER save.

Carmella gets two off a superkick with Charlotte making the very last second save. Charlotte gets sent outside so it’s another superkick to Becky, who shrugs it off without much trouble. The Disarm-Her goes on but Charlotte dives in with Natural Selection for the pin on Becky at 14:42.

Rating: C+. The action was good but the important thing here is that Carmella can go off to do ANYTHING but be in the title picture. Her reign showed the entire problem with using Money in the Bank as a quick rise to the top: Carmella was never viewed as a serious wrestler but she won a ladder match and stole the title so now she can hang with Charlotte and Becky? It never worked and this match exposed how limited she was in the ring, with all the shouting and superkicks getting old in a hurry. She is perfectly fine as the cheerleader type character and it fits her SO much better, as time has proven.

The match itself was pretty good with a lot of saves and back and forth action, but I kept wanting Carmella to fall in a hole somewhere so the other two could have a better match. The fans wanted to see Becky and having Charlotte get the title back wasn’t the most thrilling result. Becky’s frustrations are proven right again and things could get interesting as a result.

Post match Becky hugs Charlotte but completely snaps, beating the fire out of her and throwing Charlotte over the announcers’ table to one of the biggest face reactions in forever. WWE actually tried to treat this as a heel turn for a bit before realizing that it just wasn’t working and strapped a rocket to Becky’s back, leading all the way to the main event of Wrestlemania and the biggest push in women’s history.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe. AJ has been champion for about nine months and has beaten a bunch of challengers so he issued an open challenge for Summerslam. Joe choked AJ out and signed the contract before starting his real attack. He called out AJ for neglecting his family but promised to send AJ home by ending the title reign. Then he read a letter from AJ’s wife, saying that everything Joe said was true and how much she wanted Joe to win.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Joe is challenging and the fans certainly seem to like him, though AJ isn’t exactly being booed. AJ’s wife and daughter are in the crowd so Joe breaks up the Big Match Intros and says hi to both of them, promising to send daddy home tonight. An early Koquina Clutch attempt doesn’t work and it’s a TNA chant for a little flashback. Joe gets in a cheap shot in the corner and then bails to the ropes as the mind games continue.

AJ takes him down with a headlock as they’re starting slowly (which is ok). Back up and a big shoulder sends AJ into the ropes as Graves explains the psychology in a rare bit of usefulness. They trade kicks to the leg so things can start picking up a bit. In what shouldn’t be a surprise, Joe wins the battle of the strikes at first but AJ keeps going with chops against the ropes.

The drop down into the dropkick has Joe in trouble and AJ knocks him outside. Since AJ isn’t that bright, he gets his leg kicked out to send him face first into the apron. Joe hits the big suicide elbow to send AJ into the announcers’ table, with Graves saying it’s like a flying school bus. Can someone explain to Graves that the Magic School Bus is fiction? Back in and a clothesline gives Joe two and the chinlock goes on.

That goes nowhere so AJ fights up and sends Joe outside for the slingshot forearm. Back in and the middle rope moonsault into the reverse DDT gets two but Joe is right back up with a middle rope leg lariat. A big boot into the backsplash is good for two more as Joe keeps using the power advantage. AJ’s fireman’s carry gutbuster hurts his own knee so Joe is right back with the snap powerslam (great one too).

AJ is right back up and manages the Styles Clash for two and the fans bought the near fall. The Rock Bottom out of the corner gives Joe a breather but AJ is right back with the Calf Crusher (remember the leg kicks earlier). You don’t put holds on Joe though and he slams AJ’s head into the mat for the break, quickly followed by the Koquina Clutch. A foot on the rope breaks things up so Joe takes it outside….and talks to AJ’s wife, saying AJ won’t be coming home but he’ll be her new daddy. You know it’s on now as AJ tackles Joe over the barricade and hits him with a chair for the DQ at 22:45.

Rating: B. This is one where the DQ finish makes sense to keep the story going, though I’m not sure why Joe, who has been very calculating this whole time, would do something like that when he was in control. It came off more like he was admitting he couldn’t beat AJ tonight and that’s not Joe’s style. What we did get was a solid back and forth match with AJ fighting his heart out and Joe using the power and size advantage to dominate the emotional champ. I’m certainly down for a rematch and that’s where this is obviously going.

Post match AJ beats the fire out of Joe with the chair, drawing a WHO’S YOUR DADDY chant. With Joe gone, AJ checks on his wife and daughter, the latter of whom says he’s bleeding. AJ: “I’m sorry.”

Here’s Elias for a song. Believe it or not, he was a child once but then he grew up and wrote a great album. That album included a song called Elias’ Words and knowing that the entire world loves you is an incredible feeling. Tonight we’re getting a new song and it might be his greatest yet. This song is dedicated to all of the New Yorkers out there tonight, because all of the dirt in their ears and mind and the harsh reality of living in this city is all about to be washed away. And then his guitar breaks. Well so much for that.

Miz runs into the B-Team backstage (why they’re still in their gear two hours after their match isn’t clear) but he doesn’t need their luck. Tonight he’s proving that he’s better than Daniel Bryan, but if they want to fetch the limo for the post match celebration, he’s good with that. They’re leaving actually because they have their own celebrating to do. They’re not the Miztourage anymore because they’re the B-Team. The B stands for Daniel Bryan and offer him a spot on their new reality show: “Total Fellas, but with a B, so Total Bellas!” Miz looks confused.

We recap the Miz vs. Daniel Bryan, which is eight years in the making. Miz was Bryan’s NXT Pro back in the day despite Bryan being much more experienced. Bryan broke away from Miz and turned into a star but never could shake the Miz, who thought Bryan was a huge fluke. Then Bryan got hurt and had to leave for years, with Miz taunting him after he walked away and retired. Miz called him out for being a coward and started using Bryan’s offense for years.

This included Miz’s incredible Talking Smack promo where Bryan called Miz a coward, sending Miz into an all time rant about how Bryan was the coward for not getting back in the ring while Miz was here every day. Then one day Bryan was medically cleared and everyone saw this match coming. Now it’s on the big stage as everyone is ready to see Bryan kick Miz’s head off. The theme is passion vs. fame and completely different ideologies about wrestling. It’s a natural rivalry and this match has more than earned a spot on this kind of a major show.

Daniel Bryan vs. The Miz

Miz’s wife and daughter are in the front row (who knew AJ was so influential). Bryan has talked for months about wanting to punch Miz in the face so he immediately balls up his fist, sending Miz into the ropes. Miz gets in the first few shots and fires off the kicks in the corner but the running dropkick is caught by the throat. Bryan gets to punch him in the face to a BIG reaction and now it’s Miz getting kicked in the corner for his efforts.

Another kick to the chest gets two but Miz takes him down for a surfboard. It turns out that Bryan knows how to escape that pretty easily and puts Miz in it to even things up. More YES Kicks (Graves: “Paying homage to the Miz.” Tom: “I swear to God.”) connect but Miz is right back with a hard clothesline to drop Bryan again. A cravate lets Miz hit some knees to the head and Bryan is back down.

The Reality Check gets two but Miz takes too long loading up the kicks, allowing Bryan to hit the moonsault out of the corner into the running clothesline. A hurricanrana out of the corner gets two and Miz is sent outside, meaning it’s the running dropkick through the ropes. The big dive to the floor drops Miz again and Bryan gets smart by tying him in the Tree of Woe for the kicks to the chest. The belly to back superplex gets two as it keeps getting worse for Miz.

Bryan misses the big YES Kick though and Miz hits a DDT for a breather. Miz’s YES Kicks just wake Bryan up so he catches a kick and hits Miz in the face (as promised). It’s too early for the running knee as Miz counters into a failed Figure Four attempt. The Skull Crushing Finale doesn’t fail though and gives Miz his next close two. With his chest looking very banged up, Miz’s running knee is countered with another kick to the head for two and they’re both dazed.

As tends to be the case at this point in a match, they had to the apron, where Bryan’s kick hits the post to give Miz a big target. He’s smart enough to go straight to the Figure Four but Bryan eventually turns it over to reverse the pressure. Miz isn’t smart enough to just unhook his leg so it’s a long crawl to the rope for the break. Bryan is right back on him by tying up Miz’s arm for the elbows to the face and then the YES Lock.

With Miz getting close to the rope, Bryan punches him in the back of the head for some good measure. Miz gets a boot on the rope and rolls to the floor, where Bryan hits the running knee from the apron. As luck would have it though, he winds up next to Maryse, who slips him something made of metal. Bryan tries a suicide dive but gets knocked cold with a shot to the head, allowing Miz to get the pin at 23:45.

Rating: B. It wasn’t the big, epic match they were shooting for but what we got was something that got pretty close to living up to the hype. The problem is it’s nearly impossible to live up to a reality that fans had in their heads after so long, but they did very well anyway. Miz being cocky the whole time but not being able to survive against the more naturally talented Bryan made perfect sense. The cheating leaves them wide open for a rematch and since Miz’s wife got involved, Bryan’s should as well, right?

Super ShowDown is coming, including HHH vs. Undertaker for the last time ever.

Video on Undertaker vs. HHH, which is quite the story.

Baron Corbin vs. Finn Balor

Corbin has been a jerk to Balor so it’s Demon time, thankfully in a complete surprise so we didn’t have to hear THE DEMON IS FINN BALOR’S ALTER EGO for a month. The entrance shakes Corbin, possible because he’s realized that he’s Baron Corbin. Balor dropkicks him to the floor at the bell and hits the Sling Blade. The running flip dive hits Corbin and Balor sends him into the barricade. As Coach tries to figure out why Balor doesn’t use the Demon more often, it’s a top rope double stomp to Corbin’s back and the Coup de Grace finishes at 1:22. Exactly what it should have been, assuming you absolutely have to have Corbin employed.

Brie Bella checks on Bryan and they’re not happy with Miz and Maryse. Bryan says his comeback has been a bust but Brie calms him down.

United States Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is defending and this is your “it just sounds cool” match of the show, as well as a rematch after Nakamura won the title in six seconds after a low blow last month. Jeff has been dealing with Randy Orton as of late as well so you can probably pencil in the interference. There’s no major contact for the first minute or so, meaning we need a COME ON from Nakamura. Hardy charges into a knee but stops to dance like Nakamura, which doesn’t sit well with the champ. Neither does Hardy doing COME ON as things actually get going.

Nakamura knees him in the face and grabs an arm trap chinlock, which is broken with a rather quick jawbreaker. Some more kicks have Hardy right back in trouble and we hit another chinlock. Jeff fights up again and hits something close to a Sling Blade to put them both down again. Another kick drops Hardy again though as he can’t seem to figure out that he needs to avoid the feet. He finally gets the idea as a running knee hits the buckle, allowing Hardy to nail the Whisper in the Wind for two.

Since that isn’t the most high impact move, Nakamura is right back with the hard knees but the low blow misses. Jeff dropkicks him down to set up the Swanton for a delayed two. With Nakamura rolling to the apron, Hardy tries another Swanton but crashes back first onto the apron for his efforts. Kinshasa retains the title at 10:57.

Rating: D+. The chinlocks hurt this one a lot and you could feel the energy going out of the crowd. This was around the time that Nakamura was putting it in coast mode and there wasn’t much that could draw him out. His charisma is more than enough to carry him, but it would be nice to see some effort into his matches. Jeff continues to drift around, which is pretty much all he does as a singles guy these days.

Post match Orton comes out but instead of going after Jeff, he just hits himself in the head and leaves without doing anything else. He can be an odd guy.

We recap Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss. Rousey had the Raw Women’s Title won at Money in the Bank but Bliss cashed in her briefcase to steal the title from Nia Jax. Bliss has been WAY too confident coming into this so Rousey has been suspended several times, yet still getting her title match here. Tonight Rousey is going to destroy Bliss and get the title for the first time.

Raw Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss

Ronda is challenging and has Natalya, whose dad Jim Neidhart died a few weeks back (meaning she has her dad’s Summerslam 1990 jacket on for a great touch). Oh and the Bellas are here too because they’re stars. Bliss hides in the ropes a few times to start as she is trying to delay the inevitable for as long as she can. A cheap shot is blocked by a single right hand to send Bliss outside.

Back in and Bliss bails a second time so Rousey turns her back and sits down to let Bliss get in safely. Bliss comes in and tries a chinlock, not realizing that it leaves her arm exposed. Rousey picks her up for the yet to be named Piper’s Pit and Bliss is on the floor again. The chase lets Bliss get in a few shots….and there’s the stare. Rousey unloads in the corner and hits the judo throws (while talking trash), setting up the armbar (with Bliss popping the arm out of joint as only she can) for the easy tap and the title at 4:38.

Rating: C+. This is one where the presentation was all that mattered. Rousey was never in any danger and the match was a complete squash, which was the right call. There was no reason to pretend that Bliss could be a threat to her and they didn’t waste their time on anything stupid. Rousey is the biggest star in the division and one of the biggest in the company, so making her champion was the obvious move, especially since she’s here full time.

Post match Rousey hugs Natalya and the Bellas. Guess which two are booed. Her husband gets a big kiss as well. Rousey’s husband that is, in case it’s not clear.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Roman Reigns has been chasing the title and the win against Brock Lesnar for the better part of forever, having lost at Wrestlemania XXXI, Wrestlemania XXXIV and Greatest Royal Rumble. Now we’re doing it again because these two are joined at the hip in an eternal chase. This time around they’re presenting it as Reigns is here and Lesnar isn’t, even though the fans don’t seem to think much of Reigns so his attendance doesn’t make much difference. They teased Heyman jumping to Reigns but it was dropped in all of ten seconds so Lesnar could beat Reigns up again.

Raw World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Reigns’ CGI entrance is a big dog head over the Shield logo, which is rather terrifying when you don’t know it’s coming. Lesnar is defending and Paul Heyman handles his Big Match Intro. Hold on though as Strowman comes out to say he’s going to be cashing in on whomever wins. Reigns hits three Superman Punches and two spears in the first thirty seconds but the third is countered into a guillotine choke.

That’s broken up with a spinebuster and we’re just over a minute in. Brock grabs it again so Reigns uses the same counter. For once it makes sense to have them laying down this early as they’ve beaten each other up quite a bit so far. Brock takes the gloves off and counters another Superman Punch into the rolling German suplexes. The fans say the two of them suck and Reigns escapes the F5.

A missed charge sends Reigns through the ropes and into Strowman, who Lesnar plants with an F5 on the floor. Reigns is thrown back in and Strowman grabs Lesnar’s leg. That earns him a beating with the briefcase, which Lesnar throws up to the stage (egads that’s not normal). Lesnar unloads with a chair, walks back inside and gets speared to give Reigns the title at 6:09.

Rating: D. NOW NEVER FIGHT AGAIN! This feud went on forever and their matches were the same finisher fests over and over again. Strowman could have been anything from the Monster to a stray puppy as he only served as a distraction to cost Lesnar the title. Reigns winning here doesn’t feel like some major moment, though it’s nice to have Lesnar FINALLY lose the title. They should have done this at Wrestlemania at the latest though and by the time they got here, no one cared and there was no reason for them to. At least it was shorter this time around so there is one minor positive. Just get on to any other feud, please.

Reigns poses as Strowman is still down to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. I had forgotten how good this show was as WWE managed to cut out a bunch of the nonsense and just roll with the awesome matches that have been well built up. It’s so frustrating to see what they’re capable of doing when they actually try because they don’t put in the effort so much of the time. This was an awesome show with nothing very bad (Reigns vs. Lesnar is more the result of everything that came before it between the two of them) and three or four matches that got time and lived up to it. Check this one out if you have the time, but completely skip the Kickoff Show.

Ratings Comparison

Zelina Vega/Andrade Cien Almas vs. Rusev/Lana

Original: D

2019 Redo: D+

Cedric Alexander vs. Drew Gulak

Original: C+

2019 Redo: B-

Revival vs. B-Team

Original: D+

2019 Redo: D+

Dolph Ziggler vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B

2019 Redo: B

Bludgeon Brothers vs. New Day

Original: C+

2019 Redo: B-

Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman

Original: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella

Original: C+

2019 Redo: C+

AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Original: A-

2019 Redo: B

The Miz vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: B+

2019 Redo: B

Finn Balor vs. Baron Corbin

Original: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: C

2019 Redo: D+

Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: C+

2019 Redo: C+

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: C+

2019 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: A-

2019 Redo: A-

Most of them are in the same ballpark, but AJ vs. Joe and Reigns vs. Lesnar must have canceled each other out. Still a great show though and one of the better ones WWE has done in recent(ish) memory.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/08/19/summerslam-2018-they-can-still-do-a-thing-or-two/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2018 (Original): This Time For Real!

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2018
Date: August 19, 2018
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Jonathan Coachman

It’s the second biggest show of the year (I think) and that means we’re in for a stacked card. The big matches include Roman Reigns challenging Brock Lesnar for the Universal Title, AJ Styles defending the WWE Championship against Samoa Joe and, in the match that I think should close the show, Daniel Bryan vs. the Miz. Tonight has some promise so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Zelina Vega/Andrade Cien Almas vs. Rusev/Lana

Thankfully they waited a little longer before starting the first match this year, allowing some more fans to get into the arena. Last year was embarrassing looking but it’s a little better this time. The men start and it’s an early double tranquillo pose, earning Almas and Vega some Bulgarian roaring. We settle down to a RUSEV DAY chant and Rusev hitting a suplex. A missed charge sends Rusev shoulder first into the post and it’s an armbar to send us to a break.

Back with Almas getting two off a reverse tornado DDT. A second attempt is countered with a shove off the top and the hot tag brings in Lana. Vega has to come in as well and Lana kicks her down, setting up a Spinarooni of all things. A kick to the face cuts Vega off again but Lana stops to slap Almas, allowing Vega to roll her up for the pin at 6:55. They botched that one pretty badly as Vega was supposed to put her feet on the ropes but she’s so short that they couldn’t reach. Lana was barely struggling either and it didn’t look good.

Rating: D. I was really disappointed here as this could have been something very fun. What we got was a short match between the guys and then a bare bones match from the women. I don’t know if the stage got to Lana or what but this was the bad match that a lot of people have expected her to have. The finish was even worse though and made the match feel like a joke.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Drew Gulak

Gulak is challenging and everyone else is banned from ringside. Alexander has held the title since Wrestlemania and Gulak has been on a roll, making everyone tap out. Gulak takes him to the mat and then into the corner to start but it’s way too early for the Gulock (dragon sleeper). Instead Alexander rolls out and dropkicks Gulak down so it’s time to go to the floor. Back in and Alexander’s springboard is blocked with a big boot, followed by a neckbreaker onto the knee.

We take a break and come back with Gulak staying on the neck with a clothesline for two. Gulak cranks on the neck but Alexander is right back up with a bottom rope springboard Downward Spiral. Some right hands keep Gulak in trouble and Cedric followed him to the floor with a big flip dive.

Back in and Alexander catches him on the ropes, setting up a short form Gulock to really mess with the neck. A spinning elbow to the jaw gets Cedric out of trouble for the time being but Gulak smacks him in the face. Gulak reverses the Neuralizer into an ankle lock but gets reversed into a cradle. Back up and Cedric hits the C4 but Gulak turns it over into a rollup for two more. Another rollup gives Gulak two but that’s reversed into a stacked up rollup for the pin on Gulak at 10:42.

Rating: C+. They had a hot finish here with the rollups and I was actually surprised by the finish. That being said, I’m not wild on having Alexander keep the title and would have bet on Gulak picking up the belt here. There’s not much of a reason to keep the title on Alexander as he’s far from the most interesting guy in the world. At least the match was pretty good though.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. B Team

The B Team is defending and get taken down in the very early on with a dragon screw leg whip to Dallas. A Shatter Machine puts the illegal Axel down as well and it’s Dawson starting on in Dallas’ knee. Back from a break with Wilder staying on the knee and handing it back to Dawson, who gets kicked shoulder first into the post. Axel is still down from the Shatter Machine though and there’s no hot tag to be had.

Dallas’ knee is fine enough for the hanging swinging neckbreaker and now the hot tag brings Axel in. Axel cleans house and loads up the PerfectPlex but gets small packaged. The referee is with Dallas and Wilder though until Wilder snaps Dallas across the top. Dallas falls onto Axel and Wilder to turn the small package over for the pin on Dawson at 6:14.

Rating: D+. How can you not at least chuckle at these two schmucks? They’ve embraced the clueless putz characters and that’s all you can ask for. As ridiculous as they are, it’s not like the Raw tag division has anything else going on. Revival is a great team, but that doesn’t matter if they can’t get more than five minutes and a bunch of nothing opponents. This was the right call, which is better than I was expecting.

By the way, the total wrestling time on this year’s Kickoff Show: about 24 minutes, or just over half of last year’s. That’s a BIG improvement as there’s no need to have so much wrestling on a bonus feature before we get to the four hour pay per view.

The opening video features actor Terry Crews outside the arena, rhyming about what it means to be the best on the big stage. This was released earlier in the week.

There’s a big digital Empire State Building over the ring. That isn’t likely visible in the arena.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler is defending and has Drew McIntyre in his corner while Rollins has the freshly returned Dean Ambrose in his. The fans are very hot for Rollins here, especially BURN IT DOWN. Feeling out process to start with Seth being driven into the ropes but Dean is right there to cut Drew off. Back up and they run the ropes with Rollins nailing a hiptoss, sending Ziggler outside for a breather.

Seth follows him and it’s time for another big staredown. Rollins gets sent to the apron but stops to stare at Drew, allowing Ziggler to grab two off a neckbreaker. With Rollins seeming to favor his knee, Ziggler talks trash to Ambrose and then sends Rollins into the corner for a Flair Flip to the floor. Back in and the chinlock keeps Rollins in trouble for a good while. The comeback is cut off as Rollins grabs a vertical suplex over the top, only to fall out with Ziggler for a big crash.

Rollins hits a Sling Blade for two back inside and the middle rope Blockbuster gets two more. Ziggler rolls away from the threat of the frog splash so Rollins hits him with the suicide dive. The springboard clothesline sets up the ripcord knee for two and they’re both down for a minute. Ziggler’s sleeper is thrown off so they head to the apron with Ziggler saying this is it. Rollins gets shoved into the post and a jumping DDT drives him head first into the apron. That’s only good for a nine count as Rollins comes back in for the low superkick.

The frog splash hits knees though and Ziggler rolls him up for two more. Ziggler heads up top but Rollins is right there for a reverse superplex into a reverse inverted DDT (now that’s how you mix it up) and a near fall of his own. McIntyre sends Dean into the steps though, allowing Ziggler to hit the Zig Zag for the nearest fall yet. Dean is back up with Dirty Deeds to McIntyre and the bloody Rollins to avoid the superkick. The Stomp gives Rollins the title back at 22:01.

Rating: B. I know it won’t be, but I really could go for this feud ending already. It started a little over two months ago and feels like it’s been going on for a year now. At least Rollins has the title back and that’s all well and good, especially with the prospects of Ziggler and McIntyre being able to split up for good now. If nothing else, it’s nice to start the show with a good, long match for a change after last year took forever to get going.

The Bellas are here and are asked about their chances of appearing at Evolution. It turns into a list of plugs for their various projects before Nikki says they want to see Ronda Rousey win the Raw Women’s Title tonight. They’ll be ringside for the match tonight. And so it begins.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Bludgeon Brothers vs. New Day

New Day, Big E. and Xavier Woods here, are challenging after having won a tournament. Rowan runs Woods over to start and gets two each off a big boot and splash. It’s off to the fists around the head crush, followed by a pumphandle backbreaker to keep Woods down. Woods finally kicks Harper to the floor and makes the hot tag to Big E., who drops to the floor to throw some suplexes.

Back in and the Warrior Splash gets two on Harper, who comes right back with the Michinoku Driver. The double spinebuster doesn’t work though and Woods dives over the top onto Rowan. Everything breaks down and Big E. is sent into the steps, though the Brothers look a little banged up. They’re fine enough to hit the double spinebuster for two on Big E. with Woods making the save and getting the tag. Kofi gets taken down so Rowan eats the Big Ending on the floor.

A blind tag brings in Big E. but Harper stuns him with a superkick on the apron. Big E. tries the release Rock Bottom off the apron into the Codebreaker from Woods but the timing is off and it’s more like Harper just landing on Woods. Harper is fine enough to roll away from Woods’ top rope elbow so Woods hits it on the floor instead. The pain is immense but Woods throws him back in for the tag to Big E. UpUpDownDown is imminent but Rowan uses the mallet for the DQ at 9:36.

Rating: C+. They were getting somewhere before the ending to set up a rematch either on Smackdown or in the Cell. It’s a good idea to make the Brothers seem vulnerable against a top team like New Day, who couldn’t quite finish them off. At the moment the Smackdown tag team division is all of four teams so it’s a good idea to not change the titles just yet, along with keeping this match going for another month. Nice match, with an understandable ending.

Jon Stewart is here.

We recap Braun Strowman vs. Kevin Owens, which started back in June. Strowman threw him off a ladder at Money in the Bank and then won the briefcase, so Owens tried to be nice to him. Then Strowman destroyed his car, threw him in a portable toilet and off of a cage, meaning it’s time for a rematch with the briefcase on the line.

Money in the Bank Briefcase: Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman

Strowman is defending and can lose the briefcase by any means. The bell rings and Owens is knocked into the corner a few seconds later, followed by the run around the floor to shoulder him down. Strowman has so much fun that he does it again and a superkick just annoys him. A chokeslam onto the ramp knocks Owens silly and the running powerslam ends him at 1:56. Total and complete squash.

There was a Be A Star rally earlier in the week.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match. Becky Lynch beat Carmella to earn a spot but then Charlotte returned and did the same thing, earning her own shot. Charlotte and Becky then got in a bit of a passive aggressive fight over Becky being jealous of Charlotte being added. Fair enough, but WWE loves itself some triple threats.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Carmella vs. Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Carmella is defending and gets double teamed to start. In a smart move, she slaps Becky in the back of the head and blames Charlotte. The wedge doesn’t last long as Becky hiptosses Carmella to the floor and tries an early Disarm-Her on Charlotte. That goes nowhere as Charlotte escapes but gets pulled to the floor. Carmella sends Becky into the steps and reminds us that she is in fact the champion.

Back in and we hit the chinlock on Charlotte for a good while as Graves sings the champ’s praises. Becky has to be knocked off the apron, allowing Charlotte to start her comeback with the chops. Some suplexes make it even worse but Becky is back in with a double missile dropkick. Charlotte gets knocked outside and there’s the Bexploder to the champ. She crotches Becky on top though and gets two off a loose super hurricanrana. Charlotte comes back in with a spear to take them both down for two each and grabs a Walls of Jericho of all things on Carmella.

The Figure Four goes on instead but Becky makes the save with a guillotine legdrop. Carmella is back up and sends Becky outside for a suicide dive, only to have Charlotte miss the corkscrew moonsault (she slapped Carmella and completely missed Becky) to put them bot down. Back in and Carmella has to break up the Disarm-Her, followed by a superkick for two on Becky. Charlotte gets knocked to the floor and the Disarm-Her goes on, only to have Carmella grab the rope. The hold is slapped on again but Charlotte runs in with Natural Selection to Becky for the pin and the title at 14:35.

Rating: C+. Much better than I was expecting here and they better turn Becky heel after that ending. Thankfully they took the title off of Carmella, but at this point either she or Charlotte has been champion since November. They need some fresh blood in there, which hopefully is a ticked off Lynch.

Post match Carmella leaves so Becky and Charlotte can hug, only for Becky to turn on Charlotte and beat the fire out of her to a HUGE YES chant. Becky throws her over the table, leaving Charlotte to take a YOU DESERVE IT chant. That was the only way to go as A, Becky has a legitimate complaint about Charlotte being put into the match and stealing her title and B, there isn’t anyone else for Charlotte to fight.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match. AJ Styles has been champion since November, becoming the longest reigning World Champion in Smackdown history. Joe signed the contract to face him, partially because there was no one left aside from maybe Miz. After the match was set, Joe started talking about how AJ was sacrificing his family to be champion. AJ tried to keep things calm, but Joe read a letter supposedly from AJ’s wife Wendy, saying Joe was completely right. In other words, AJ isn’t happy.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Joe is challenging and even introduces AJ’s wife and daughter at ringside. It’s a feeling out process to start as AJ is a little more calm than (erg, especially after Joe’s comments) he should be here, even as the fans chant TNA. AJ grabs a headlock to slow Joe down but a heavy shoulder cuts him off. Some leg kicks have AJ in even more trouble but he’s right back with some forearms. The sliding forearm sends Joe outside and AJ tries to follow him, only to get kicked in the knee to take him off the apron.

A hard suicide dive sends AJ into the announcers’ table and one heck of a clothesline takes his head off back inside. We hit the chinlock, which makes you wonder why Joe doesn’t turn around just a hair and make it the Koquina Clutch instead. AJ gets up and knocks Joe’s block off with a right hand to the floor, followed by the slingshot forearm. Joe charges into an enziguri and the Phenomenal Blitz sets up another running forearm. The moonsault into a reverse DDT gets two on Joe and AJ puts him on top.

That doesn’t go well for the champ, who gets shoved down for a middle rope knee to a standing AJ for two more. The running big boot into the backsplash gets the same but AJ is right back with the fireman’s carry backbreaker. AJ is limping a bit and misses the Phenomenal Forearm, allowing Joe to snap him over with the powerslam for two more. A one armed Styles Clash gives AJ the same and they’re both down. Back up and they slug the heck out of it until a Pele sends Joe into the corner.

AJ makes the mistake of charging into the release Rock Bottom but is still able to put on the Calf Crusher. Joe’s solution: slam AJ’s head into the mat over and over. Joe slips over into the Koquina Clutch but AJ gets his foot on the ropes. It’s Muscle Buster time but AJ forearms him in the head. That’s fine with Joe, who hits one of the loudest enziguris I’ve ever heard to knock AJ outside. Joe sends him into the steps and grabs the mic. He tells Wendy that AJ isn’t coming home but he’ll be her new daddy. A suddenly bloody AJ tackles Joe off the table and through the barricade, followed by a chair to the back for the DQ at 22:46.

Rating: A-. You have to imagine that the Cell awaits these two and for once, the story would seem to fit that. AJ being able to do whatever he wants to Joe fits, but it would also seem to play much more into Joe’s hands. Anyway, of course these two had a great match because that’s all they know how to do. They were beating the fire out of each other and I want to see it again, which is the sign of a well done match. Really good stuff here, as expected.

Post match the beating continues until Wendy says that’s enough. AJ goes over to his family and his incredibly cute daughter says “daddy you’re bleeding”. AJ apologizes and hugs her before walking away with his family. Joe is TICKED as he leaves.

Here’s Elias to plug his album and talk about how awesome his songs are. He even has a new song, which he’s debuting right here in New York City. And then his guitar breaks. That’s too much for Elias, who throws the pieces around and storms off without saying anything.

Miz runs into the B Team and says if Bryan had followed his example, he might have lived off of Miz’s success like they had. For old times sake, they can fetch his limo for the celebration after. Actually they have their own celebrating to do because they’re the B Team and the B stands for Daniel Bryan. Dallas likes Miz and Mrs. (which he pronounces Mers) but they have their own show: Total Fellas. Dallas: “But with a B! Total Bellas!” Miz is stupefied as they leave.

We recap the Miz vs. Daniel Bryan. This one is over eight years in the making as Bryan came into WWE as Miz’s NXT rookie, despite being a top independent star. Bryan eventually defeated Miz a few times but they went on their own paths. Miz won a WWE Title while Bryan became the top star in the company, only to have injuries take him away for a few years. Now he’s back and healthy though, meaning it’s time for these two to FINALLY have the big match on the grand stage.

They’ve done a great job of setting up the culture clash here as Bryan is all about the love of wrestling and Miz is about becoming a star. Those worlds don’t jive and it’s made their feud that much better. The crowd reaction should be interesting, though Bryan is going to be the biggest face that ever faced around here.

The Miz vs. Daniel Bryan

Maryse is in the front row with a baby carriage. Miz hides in the corner for a bit before scoring with some YES Kicks. The running dropkick connects but Bryan grabs him by the throat and hammers away. The real YES Kicks rock Miz and a big one to the chest puts him down. Miz gets in a knee to the ribs and the surfboard goes on. Of course Bryan knows how to get out of that and starts kicking at Miz’s legs.

The REAL surfboard goes on and Bryan even bends back to get two off a bridge. Back up and Miz catches him with a hard clothesline, followed by a cravate with bonus trash talk. Miz starts firing off some knees to the head but Bryan is right back with right hands of his own. The moonsault over Miz sets up the running clothesline and the running corner dropkicks connect. A backdrop sends Miz to the floor and Bryan follows with two boots through the ropes and a top rope clothesline.

Back in and Miz gets caught in the Tree of Woe, which of course means more YES Kicks. One heck of a top rope belly to back suplex puts Miz down for two more but he’s right back with the short DDT. With Miz’s chest blood red, he fires off some NO Kicks of his own, which bring Bryan back to his feet. Bryan dragon screw whips Miz’s leg and hits the big kick to the head but can’t get the YES Lock. Instead a catapult into the post sets up the Skull Crushing Finale for two but Miz charges into another kick for another two.

They head to the apron with Bryan firing off kicks until the last one hits the post. That means a Figure Four back inside and Bryan is in big trouble. As usual, the solution is to punch Miz in the face and then turn the hold over. Miz lets it go and tries the Finale but Bryan kicks him in the back (the leg shouldn’t be able to do that) and goes with the heavy elbows to the head.

The YES Lock goes on and Bryan punches Miz in the back of the head as the aggression continues to come out. Miz makes the rope though and bails to the floor, only to get kneed in the head. That knocks Miz right in front of Maryse, who hands him something. Whatever it is knocks Bryan silly when he tries a suicide dive, giving Miz the pin at 23:30.

Rating: B+. I liked this one as much as I expected to and the ending does set up a rematch. You have to imagine that Bryan is sticking around given that finish as there’s a wide open door for the feud to continue. It was a nice, long match and got the attention that it deserved, but it didn’t feel like the final match throughout. The ending takes care of that though and everything is fine.

Replays confirm the object, with Graves going into full Bobby Heenan mode to talk his way around the cheating.

Video on Undertaker vs. HHH for Super Show-Down in their final match. To be fair they haven’t been ridiculous with the plugging tonight.

Baron Corbin vs. Finn Balor

THE DEMON IS BACK! FOR THIS MATCH??? This is the rubber match after Corbin started being mean to Balor for being small. It’s been a horrible story but the Demon makes up for some of it. Cole gets his Demon history wrong, saying it last appeared two years ago. It was last year Cole. You called the match.

The fans are VERY pleased and Corbin is told he has to face him. The bell rings and it’s the shotgun dropkick into the Sling Blade to put Baron on the floor in the smoke. Balor adds a flip dive and it’s another Sling Blade on the floor. Back in and Balor hits a top rope double stomp to the back, followed by the Coup de Grace for the pin at 1:29. NOW THAT’S MORE LIKE IT!

Bryan is ticked off when Brie finally remembers that they’re married and comes in to see him in his moment of need. He calls his comeback a bust but she gives him a pep talk which seems to work well enough.

US Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jeff Hardy

Nakamura is defending after taking the title from Hardy last month. Feeling out process to start and of course Nakamura is over like free beer in a frat house in New York. Nakamura dodges a few early shots and tells him to COME ON. Jeff does exactly the same and sends Nakamura into four buckles in a row. That earns him a quick takedown and Nakamura slaps on a chinlock.

Nakamura hammers on him a bit more until Hardy, to the tune of a BROTHER NERO chant, comes back up with a Sling Blade. An atomic drop sets up the legdrop between the legs and a basement dropkick gets two. Jeff slips out of the reverse exploder but the slingshot dropkick is countered into Nakamura sitting him on the top. The running knee misses though and Jeff gets two off a Whisper in the Wind.

Nakamura is fine enough to catch him with another kick to the head, followed by the sliding knee for two. Kinshasa is countered into a failed Twist of Fate attempt but Hardy is ready for the low blow. Now the Twist of Fate sets up the Swanton Bomb for a delayed two as Nakamura grabs the bottom rope. A second Twist of Fate sends Nakamura bailing to the apron, so Jeff climbs the post and Swantons the apron because he’s that freaking crazy. Back in and the Kinshasa finishes whatever is left of Hardy at 10:55.

Rating: C. I have no idea how Hardy is still walking and I don’t think he does either most of the time. The match was fine enough and Hardy gave it a run but Nakamura needed this way more than Hardy did. If nothing else Hardy already has Randy Orton sitting around for their big pay per view match so the loss was the only option here. Not a bad match, but nothing great, especially on a long shot.

Post match Orton comes out, smacks himself in the head, and leaves without even getting in the ring. Ok then.

We recap Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss. Rousey was about to win the Raw Women’s Title last month but Bliss interfered for a DQ and cashed in her briefcase to win the title. Bliss then made Rousey snap and got her suspended for a month. Rousey’s reward: a match for the title tonight.

Raw Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss

Rousey is challenging and before the match, here’s Natalya in the same jacket her dad wore at Summerslam 1990. Bliss comes out and sneers at the Bella Twins, who are sitting in the front row. Rousey now has eye paint and her name on her shorts as she does the power walk to the ring. Bliss hides in the corner to start (smart) and a single right hand puts her on the floor. More stalling ensues so Rousey even turns her back and sits down so Bliss can come in with no problem.

Rousey closes her eyes and Bliss grabs a chinlock, meaning it’s time for the scary Ronda face. The hold is broken (Bliss: “No no no no no!” Rousey: “YES!”) and there’s the swinging Samoan drop. A chase lets Bliss get in a forearm and Rousey is just made angrier. Bliss gets flipped on her face and Rousey unloads in the corner, followed by some judo throws. Another swinging Samoan drop (Rousey: “ARE YOU READY???”) connects and it’s armbar time. The arm is twisted in a variety of angles (including Bliss popping it in and out of joint) and one hard crank makes Bliss tap at 4:39.

Rating: C+. What do you want me to say? That was exactly what it should have been as Rousey should be able to destroy Bliss in short order. I’m not sure who is supposed to take the title off of Rousey, but if she can hold it until Wrestlemania (which she likely will), there’s a heck of a dream match to be had with Charlotte. Total squash here and, again, Rousey looked like she’s been doing this for years.

Post match Natalya comes in for the celebration and the Bellas join them because reasons. Rousey goes into the crowd and kisses her husband for the nice moment.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns (again). As is usually the case, Reigns is whining about how Lesnar is lazy and doesn’t like the fans so he should get another title shot. Also as usual, the fans don’t seem to buy it and Reigns isn’t likely to be cheered here. There are a few options for the finish and that makes the ending a little more interesting than usual.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Brock is defending and gets no reaction (That HAD to be muted. No New York crowd has ever been that quiet). Hang on though as here’s Strowman with the briefcase. He’s not cashing in behind anyone’s back because he’ll be waiting on the winner. The bell rings and Reigns hits two Superman Punches and a pair of spears but the third is countered into a guillotine choke. That’s broken up with a spinebuster but Lesnar puts it right back on.

Another spinebuster breaks the hold again and they’re both down. Lesnar takes his gloves off and it’s Suplex City time. Three straight German suplexes draw a YOU BOTH SUCK chant and Reigns can barely stand. Reigns is back up with a missed charge that hits Strowman so Lesnar goes outside and gives Braun an F5 on the floor. With Reigns back in, Lesnar beats on Strowman with the briefcase, which he then throws from ringside all the way to the entrance, breaking part of the LED board. Strowman gets chaired down but Lesnar walks into a spear to make Reigns champion at 6:16.

Rating: C+. I know they repeat moves and I know the ending isn’t the most popular move in the world, but these two know how to make the matches feel big. I was wanting to see what happened and that’s more than you can say about a lot of matches. Reigns finally getting rid of Lesnar is a good thing, but I really wish they would just get rid of the briefcase already so it doesn’t have to be around.

Reigns poses to end the show with no cash-in.

Overall Rating: A-. That was a heck of a show and above all else it was about the pacing. They did a GREAT job of making this show stay at a steady pace with some hot matches and then a quick match to let the fans get back into it. That took place throughout the night and did wonders for the show, which never felt like it dragged. Compare this to Wrestlemania, which felt like it dragged every few minutes.

On top of that, the wrestling was solid all night long with good to very good wrestling, logical booking decisions and stuff being set up for the future. This was a very entertaining night and notice the crowd not taking the show over at all. That’s a nice change of pace and made the evening that much more enjoyable. Really good stuff here and the best WWE pay per view in a long time.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Dolph Ziggler – The Stomp

New Day b. Bludgeon Brothers via DQ when Rowan used the mallet

Braun Strowman b. Kevin Owens – Running powerslam

Charlotte b. Becky Lynch and Carmella – Natural Selection to Lynch

Samoa Joe b. AJ Styles via DQ when Styles used a chair

The Miz b. Daniel Bryan – Left hand with a foreign object

Finn Balor b. Baron Corbin – Coup de Grace

Shinsuke Nakamura b. Jeff Hardy – Kinshasa

Ronda Rousey b. Alexa Bliss – Armbar

Roman Reigns b. Brock Lesnar – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2017 (2018 Redo): The Lot Of Good Show

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2017
Date: August 20, 2017
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 16,128
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T., Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s kind of amazing how these modern shows go in one ear and out the other. Aside from the main event, I couldn’t tell you a single thing on this show, and I can tell you every match (mostly in order) from the first seventeen or so Wrestlemanias. It’s the nature of the shows being built up so fast and then running so long, as the same is true of shows I’ve been to even this year. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: The Miz/Miztourage vs. Hardy Boyz/Jason Jordan

Rematch from Raw. Now this one I remember because it took place about twenty minutes into the two hour Kickoff Show and the place was embarrassingly empty with MAYBE twenty percent of the place full. It’s just awful looking as the fans who aren’t in yet (as in the majority of them) are going to be annoyed at missing a match and the wrestlers have to go out in front of this empty building like they’re on some nothing indy show (in a huge arena for some reason). I mean, what in the world is the point?

Matt headlocks Axel to start and it’s quickly off to Jeff as the dozens and dozens of fans get behind the good guys. Jordan comes in to crank on the arm to no reaction, at least partially because there aren’t many people here to cheer. A dropkick gets two on Dallas and Jordan muscles him down to the mat.

Everything breaks down and Jordan directs traffic as the Hardys chop away in the corner. Axel saves Dallas from the Swanton and we take a break. Back with Jeff getting two off a basement dropkick as the crowd is now just embarrassing instead of depressing. Dallas pushed Jeff off the top though and it’s time to start the stomping in the corner. Miz (oh yeah he’s in this match) comes in for a reverse chinlock but Jeff kicks him away without too much effort.

Instead it’s Axel coming in to twist Jeff’s neck around as the fans chant for BROTHER NERO. Jeff dropkicks Miz and Dallas off the apron and knocks Axel away as well, allowing the lukewarm tag off to Matt. The middle rope elbow to the back of the neck gets two on Miz but he’s right back up with the YES Kicks. Matt shrugs those off though and there’s a Side Effect for the same. Jordan comes in to throw Axel around, including a suplex for two. Everything breaks down and Miz makes a blind tag, setting up a Skull Crushing Finale to pin Jordan at 10:31.

Rating: C. The crowd killed what would have otherwise been a pretty good six man tag. When you can hear the wrestlers breathing, it’s pretty clear that there isn’t much going on in the arena, which isn’t exactly the atmosphere you want for a show billed as a big party. The match itself was fine, and it helps to not have watched it six days earlier.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Akira Tozawa vs. Neville

Tozawa, part of Titus Worldwide, is defending after winning the title from Neville on Monday. He also has a banged up shoulder. You remember Neville. He was the awesome guy who turned into one of the best heels in the company but WWE decided that having him put over Enzo Amore made more sense and since there was apparently no way Neville could be a heavyweight again, he walked out a few months later.

Neville shoulders him down to start and then dropkicks the glare off of Tozawa’s face. That’s it for now though as Neville sends him outside and screams a lot, as is his custom. The jumping backsplash crushes Neville back inside but he’s able to snap Tozawa’s throat across the top rope. Back from a break with Neville scoring off a missile dropkick to the back for two and stopping to sneer.

The chinlock lets Tozawa have a breather and he fights up to send Neville outside again. That means the big suicide dive and a Saito suplex but it’s too early for the top rope backsplash. Instead Tozawa reverses a fireman’s carry into an Octopus hold as he’s certainly keeping things varied. Neville makes the ropes so Tozawa hits a Shining Wizard for two.

An enziguri staggers Tozawa but he’s right back with a second Shining Wizard to put both guys down. Tozawa is up first but gets pulled down by the bad shoulder. His legs are fine enough to kick Neville in the head and it’s time to go up again. After knocking Neville off the top, the backsplash hits knees and the champ is in big trouble. Neville jumps up top and hits the Red Arrow to the back for the pin and the title at 11:45.

Rating: C+. I get what they were going for here with the title change taking place on Summerslam but why not go with the first title change here and then switch it back tomorrow or the next week on Raw? Or, dare I suggest it, on 205 Live? Other than that it felt like they were just kind of going through the motions at times, but Neville going through the motions is still pretty good.

The crowd is fine now.

Kickoff Show: Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. New Day

New Day is defending in what is kind of another Smackdown rematch, though it’s a different New Day lineup. Tonight it’s Woods and Big E., who has a huge cape. On the way to the ring, Kofi talks about how this is the place New Day first sang together and the original Francesca was born. Her sacrifice is what allowed us to have Francesca II: TURBO. Tonight they’re here to tear the house down with the Usos one more time.

Woods and Jimmy start things off in a technical sequence until Woods hits a roaring elbow to knock Jimmy’s block off. Some forearms in the corner have Jimmy in trouble but he gets in a shot to the face to stagger Woods. Back from a break with Jey putting on a chinlock and then slinging Woods into the corner. Woods knocks Jey off the top and avoids a charge from Jimmy. A missile dropkick has Jey in trouble but Jimmy pulls Big E. off the apron.

Thankfully the hot tag isn’t just a few seconds later and a backbreaker/middle rope knee combination gets two. Woods is in big trouble but scores with a victory roll faceplant (not a bad little move), which is finally enough for the hot tag to Big E. House is cleaned, including the release Rock Bottom out of the corner for two on Jey. Big E. powerbombs Woods onto Jey as the fast tags begin.

Woods even manages to electric chair Big E. so he can splash Jey as well but Jimmy comes in for a save. The double spinebuster gets two on Big E. and there’s the running Umaga attack for good measure as the pace picks up. Woods comes back in for a Rock Bottom into a Backstabber, which is somehow only good for two. That’s a heck of a finisher for those two if they’re ever a regular team.

Jey gets a blind tag but Woods knocks both Usos to the floor just in case. Big E.’s spear through the ropes is cut off by a superkick and a Superfly Splash while he’s still stuck in the ropes. The regular Superfly Splash gets a close two on Woods but he pulls Jey into a Koji Clutch. That’s broken up as well so Woods goes with a Shining Wizard for two.

A tornado DDT to the floor plants Jey and Jimmy takes the Midnight Hour, only to have Jey dive in at the last second for another save. Jimmy Samoan drops Woods to the floor and Kofi gets sent into the steps for checking on his buddy. Big E. is right back up with the spear through the ropes to take Jey down. Woods is done though and it’s four straight superkicks to Big E. into the double Us to give the Usos the titles back at 19:09.

Rating: B. Is there any surprise that this was the best thing on the Kickoff Show? This took some time to get going but these four delivered, as always. They know how to work well together and the diving saves for the false finishes were great. You could run these two over and over again, which is exactly what happened for the next few months. That can only go on for so long though, and that’s why the division isn’t great to this day.

The opening video starts with a shot of Brooklyn before heading backstage. The bigger matches get a quick look as someone spray paints the Summerslam logo onto a wall. That’s rather generic for the opening of such a big show.

John Cena vs. Baron Corbin

Corbin attacked Shinsuke Nakamura after Nakamura beat Cena, who made the save. Cena then cost Corbin his Money in the Bank cash-in to really hammer this home. The fans, ever so nice, ask Baron where his briefcase is. Cena slides outside to mock Corbin, even throwing on JBL’s hat. Well that makes any adult look like a moron so Corbin gives chase but Cena slides back in.

A headlock keeps Corbin on trouble as JBL points out the Cena issue with the crowd: they’re always chanting about him, whether it’s positive or negative. That’s not the best sign for the opponents, but at least Corbin had the chant to start the match. Some knees to the ribs put Cena in trouble and Corbin pops him in the jaw with a right hand.

The slide underneath the corner sets up the hard clothesline for two and Corbin is already looking frustrated. A suplex gets the same so it’s time to yell at the referee. Corbin hits a World’s Strongest Slam and we hit the chinlock. The fans ask about the briefcase again so Corbin says it’s on Cena. Another comeback starts up with the flying shoulders until Corbin slides under the ropes again, only to slide back in for a chokebreaker.

Cena blocks a superplex attempt and hits a tornado DDT, sending the fans right back into their chorus of booing. The AA is reversed into a Deep Six and Corbin can’t believe the kickout. He’s so serious that the shirt comes off and more slugging ensues. Cena sends him into the corner for the third slide but this time Corbin eats a big clothesline. The AA is good for the pin at 10:12.

Rating: D+. So that happened. The story wasn’t great, the action was nothing to see and Cena hit all of two moves to win in the end. Cena would go on to feud with Roman Reigns for the real rub, but that’s not the best way to boost Corbin. Just a complete nothing of a match here and it felt like they were getting it out of the way instead of featuring it, which is really weird to see for Cena.

Cena hugging kids and throwing his wristbands and dog tags is always cool to see. That just works.

Some wrestlers played Rocket League.

We recap Naomi vs. Natalya. Naomi won the title at Wrestlemania but Natalya thinks she’s turned it into a toy. Natalya attacked Becky Lynch after a match so Naomi made the save. This qualifies for the build to a title match.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Natalya vs. Naomi

Naomi is defending and gets slapped in the face at the bell but snaps off a hurricanrana to get herself out of trouble. A Blockbuster off the steps gives Naomi two more but Natalya posts her hard to take over. Back in and Natalya stomps away but the emotional offense has never been her strong suit. James Ellsworth and Miss Money in the Bank Carmella are watching in the back (she held that thing so long that she is still champion and Ellsworth has left, returned and left again in less than a year) as Natalya hits a running clothesline.

Naomi’s kicks to the legs don’t have much effect so Natalya grabs an abdominal stretch. That goes nowhere so Natalya hits the discus lariat for two and loads up a superplex. Naomi slips out and hits a super Russian legsweep, which of course gets us to even despite both of them taking the same impact. A spinning kick to the head and a headscissors driver give Naomi two but the dancing kicks are shrugged off (as they should be) with Natalya dropkicking her in the face.

Natalya gets caught in the ropes though and a slingshot legdrop gives Naomi two. The reverse Rings of Saturn is countered into the Sharpshooter but Naomi pulls rolls through and sends Natalya head first into the buckle. Not that it matters though as the split legged moonsault misses, setting up another Sharpshooter to make Naomi tap at 10:50.

Rating: D+. I was bored during this as Natalya is a black hole of charisma and Naomi isn’t the best at being serious. The wrestling was dull too and there was nothing happening here to draw me in. It doesn’t help when the women’s division on both shows have been dominated by the Four Horsewomen for so long that it’s almost impossible to get invested in anyone else (though Naomi has come a long, long way in the last year).

Post match Naomi is rather depressed.

We recap Big Cass vs. Big Show. Cass and Enzo Amore have split up and Show is standing up for him. Tonight though Enzo is being locked in a cage (good start) and Show has a broken hand thanks to Cass crushing it in the shark cage.

Big Show vs. Big Cass

Before the match, Enzo makes various Brooklyn/New York City rap references. He talks about loving to talk and how his worst day is better than Cass’ best and Cass has no heart. Thankfully Cass comes out to cut off the never ending promo and Enzo goes up in the cage. Show, not being the brightest guy in the world, hits Cass with the broken hand as Enzo is already running his mouth. He dances in the cage a bit, shouting about having the best seat in the house.

Cass gets thrown around and kicked in the ribs and there’s the side slam, only to have Show bang up the hand again. Enzo shouts something about Patrick the Starfish as Show misses a Vader Bomb, injuring his hand again. Cass’ big boot is blocked by a weak KO punch for two but the second attempt hits Show’s chest. It’s time to start in on the hand even more, despite that not really doing anything that’s going to let Cass pin him. Something like an armbar has Enzo jumping up and down, further making me want to see him put inside a wood chipper.

The fans call the hold boring so Cass stops, poses, and puts it on again. Show throws him down and hits a left armed clothesline, followed by the chokeslam for two. The hand goes into the post as Enzo is leaning through the cage bars. With Show down, Enzo pulls off his pants and whips out a bottle of lubricant (there’s no way I’m touching that one), oils himself up, and gets out of the cage. The match completely stops until Enzo gets down so Cass can kick him in the face. A pair of big boots put Show down and the Empire Elbow is good for the pin at 10:29.

Rating: F+. What in the world was that supposed to be? This was all about the bad hand but somehow it became about Enzo, that loudmouthed idiot, and then Cass just wins clean. I have no idea how this was the best idea they had but it was an awful match and a big waste of time. If I ever see Enzo oiled up again, I’ll be off in the next room gouging my eyes out.

General Manager Kurt Angle and Daniel Bryan get in a YES/NO off about which show will be better for the rest of the night.

Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Rusev jumps him from behind before the bell and Orton is in trouble. They get inside for the bell and it’s the RKO in ten seconds. That would be your “well the card is huge and we have to cut something” match of the night.

Bayley wishes Sasha Banks good luck tonight. Banks is taking her place due to a shoulder injury.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Alexa Bliss

Banks is challenging and has special gear that makes her look like a peacock (so she’s copying Charlotte tonight). Bliss gets fired up to start and slugs away in the corner but Banks flips her around and hammers at the champ’s head. One heck of a forearm drops Banks and Bliss talks some trash. With the forearms boring her, Bliss pulls Banks’ hair around the ropes and crotches her on the middle rope for painful measure. We hit the chinlock as it’s almost all Bliss in the early going.

A lot more trash talk sets up a choke shove to put Banks down again as the fans are trying to get behind Banks. The middle rope knees into the moonsault knees give Bliss two more and she drops Banks on the back of her head for the same. Bliss goes to the middle rope and chokes some more until Banks slams her down. A dropkick and clothesline put the champ down for two but she knees Banks in the face to take over again. Bliss’ Code Red out of the corner is countered into something like an Alabama Slam, followed by just kneeing the heck out of Bliss in the corner.

The Bank Statement doesn’t work as Bliss is right next to the ropes. Bliss pulls her down into the ring skirt and dumps Banks to the floor for a near countout, with Bliss freaking out when she gets back in. Twisted Bliss only gets two more and now Bliss doesn’t know what to do. Since hitting it again is out of the question, Bliss picks her up and gets pulled down into the Bank Statement. Banks’ shoulder gives out so she tries the hold again and Bliss taps at 13:17.

Rating: C. Nothing much to see here with Banks shrugging off everything Bliss threw at her and winning without a ton of drama. Bliss got to show off the offense here and looked very good, though there’s not much she can do when Banks is on offense for all of a minute and a half and wins completely clean. Banks would lose the title just eight days later, continuing her trend of not being able to remain champion for very long.

Video on wrestlers auditioning to be the new Colonel Sanders. A fight breaks out and Shawn Michaels winds up winning in one of the most random, bizarre things you’ll ever see. Becky Lynch as the Colonel oddly works.

We recap Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt. Bray had targeted Balor as his latest false idol, beat him on Raw, and covered him in fake blood. Balor then decided to bring the Demon back to fight as hard as he could. This worked in NXT but not up here and that was mainly for one reason: Cole explaining/hyping the Demon EVERY TWO FREAKING SECONDS, saying over and over that “the Demon is Finn Balor’s alter ego” because WWE doesn’t think its fans are that bright. I don’t think NXT ever actually explained it (if they did it was once) because they know how smart fans can be. And that’s why the Demon has never been back.

Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt

Cole mentions the Demon idea again during Bray’s entrance but gets cut off as He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands starts playing for Finn. We get the big smoky entrance with Finn looking awesome and the camera getting an AWESOME shot of him with his back to the ring and the crowd posing with him. Balor gets to the ring and LET’S HIT THAT EXPLANATION again. Seriously it’s not exactly a character that needs to be broken down and it’s made worse when Cole does it.

Wyatt is hesitant to start and a right hand just ticks Balor off. Balor shows him how to throw some real right hands and Wyatt needs a breather on the floor. You don’t do that to Balor, who charges around the corner to drop Wyatt again. Back in and Balor isn’t phased by the upside down stare so Wyatt bails to the floor. This time it’s a big flip dive as it’s all Balor so far. Bray finally pulls him off the apron and hammers away, followed by something like a reverse Stunner out of the corner.

Of course that means a chinlock, because even though Bray is a cult leader, he still follows WWE wrestling tropes. Balor is right back up with a Pele kick and a baseball slide to the floor. The double stomp from the apron to Bray’s back keeps him in trouble, causing Graves to drop a (failed) external occipital protuberance reference. I knew I liked him for a reason.

Bray kicks him in the face and hits the release Rock Bottom for two. The running backsplash gets the same but Finn kicks him to the floor for the shotgun dropkick against the barricade. Back in and Bray scores with a kick so it’s spider walk time. Balor pops to his feet, hits a Sling Blade, another shotgun dropkick, and the Coup de Grace for the pin at 10:39.

Rating: D. This was as exciting as Bray hitting some basic offense while Balor did all of his usual stuff. The problem again is in the Demon, which was what Balor would bring out for his biggest, most violent fights. When it’s just the standard wrestling match and even a pretty dominant Finn performance, the whole Demon character is pretty much a waste.

Ad for the Mae Young Classic. In other words, the modern NXT women’s division.

We recap Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose vs. the Bar, which is built around the idea of Dean and Seth not being able to trust each other. They kept offering the Shield fist until they FINALLY got back together, mainly due to having to deal with the Bar. Now they’re united after a very well done series of segments that them saving each other but not being willing to trust each other. They got in a fight though and the Bar coming out to join in was FINALLY enough to get them to agree to fight together. This was actually a heck of a build and I got sucked into it, both live and again during the recap video.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose

Sheamus and Cesaro are defending and it’s Sheamus getting taken down so the challengers can drop some elbows. Rollins Downward Spirals Cesaro into Dean’s boot and the champs are cleared out early on. A quick distraction lets Sheamus Brogue Kick Dean so Seth tries a suicide dive onto both guys. That gets him slammed down hard as momentum changes in a hurry.

We settle down to Cesaro gutwrench suplexing Seth and the chinlock goes on. Rollins fights back and hits a Blockbuster but Ambrose is still down off what is apparently the most devastating Brogue Kick of all time. Sheamus keeps Rollins in the corner as Cesaro runs into the crowd and destroys a beach ball, because Cesaro is more awesome than you. An enziguri gets Rollins out of trouble but this time it’s Cesaro cutting him off. Seth sends him outside though and Cesaro comes up holding his knee.

Rollins goes out after him with Sheamus following, meaning it’s Dean diving onto everyone at once. Back in and Rollins rolls underneath Cesaro and makes the hot tag to bring in Ambrose. Everything breaks down and Seth springboards in with a clothesline to Sheamus. There’s the double suicide dive and the fans are eating up all these double team spots. We settle down again with Ambrose powering out of the Neutralizer and hitting the rebound lariat, only to have Sheamus cut off the tag.

Ambrose catches him on top with a superplex into a very fast frog splash from Rollins but Cesaro makes the save. Rollins and Ambrose are tired of this tagging stuff and unload on Sheamus in the corner but he’s right back with a tilt-a-whirl slam. Cesaro swings Dean for all of two rotations and the Sharpshooter goes on, with Dean looking more surprised than in pain. With Dean getting close to the rope, Cesaro rolls over into a Crossface to change focal points.

Instead of going for the submission, Cesaro loads up a powerbomb with Sheamus adding a top rope clothesline for another close two. Rollins finally comes in and gets knocked outside just as fast. Dean tells the champs to bring it so they load up a spike White Noise. Hang on though as Rollins is right in there with a hurricanrana to send Cesaro into Dean and Sheamus for the save. The wind up knee into Dirty Deeds finishes Sheamus for the titles at 18:38.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but there was no other way to go with the finish. Rollins and Ambrose are a great team and the fans love them so let them have a long match and take the titles for a change. There was some chemistry here and that made for a good, long match that the show desperately needed.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens. They’ve traded the US Title for a few months now and Owens is claiming a conspiracy thanks to the referee missing his shoulder being up in the most recent title match. Therefore, Shane McMahon is guest referee tonight, despite having a history with AJ and a history of being a crooked referee.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens

AJ is defending with Shane as guest referee. They get in a fight before the bell with Shane pulling them apart twice in a row, because Shane is going to be the focal point here. The bell rings and they fight out to the floor with AJ hitting a knee from the apron. Back in and AJ keeps him down, followed by a knee drop. One heck of a clothesline takes AJ’s head off and the Cannonball gets two.

The backsplash gets the same and the near fall off the Edge-O-Matic has Owens yelling at Shane. AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant and the fireman’s carry into a backbreaker gives him two of his own. They’re both banged up and the delay allows Owens to “accidentally” shove Shane into the ropes to crotch AJ on top. He’s fine enough for a springboard 450, which hits Shane after Owens pulls him in. For reasons of storyline convenience, AJ is down after splashing Shane, allowing Owens to hit the Pop Up Powerbomb for two, thanks to a delayed count.

That means ANOTHER argument with Shane, allowing AJ to grab the Calf Crusher but Owens pokes him in the eye. Owens sends AJ into Shane to knock him to the floor, meaning there’s no referee to see Owens tap to another Calf Crusher. Now it’s AJ’s turn to yell at Shane, who shoves AJ into a rollup for a pretty fast two. The annoyed AJ puts him on top, only to get caught in the swinging superplex for the big crash.

Owens wins a slugout but gets reversed into a Styles Clash for a clean two. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets three, though with AJ’s foot on the ropes at one. Shane: “TWO!” That means another argument with Shane, who shoves Owens into a rollup for two, meaning they’re not repeating spots from earlier in the match. The Phenomenal Forearm into the Styles Clash retains AJ’s title at 17:23.

Rating: B-. Well of course most of the match was about Shane, because that’s what a Summerslam title match should be about. The wrestling was fine but you kept waiting on Shane to do something else. I’m not sure how this was the best they could do with Styles, but at least there’s an Owens vs. Shane story set up for the next eight months. That’s more important than the US Title and Summerslam right?

Video on some fans winning a sweepstakes and got to go to the show.

We recap Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal and I can feel the headache coming. Mahal won the WWE Championship in a period of Vince McMahon insanity and has held it since May. Nakamura has hit Kinshasa on a bunch of people, including Cena to become #1 contender. In other words: help us Shinsuke Nakamura. You’re our only hope.

Smackdown World Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Nakamura is challenging and a live violinist plays him to the ring. The fans singing the song is awesome as usual, especially when you consider it doesn’t have words. Jinder grabs a wristlock to start so Nakamura spins around into a headlock, much to the crowd’s delight. Nakamura puts him up against the ropes for the arm shaking and the required COME ON. Mahal bails to the floor so it’s a triple COME ON, including the Singh Brothers. The fans chant for 3MB because the comedy version of Mahal is better than the main event version.

With nothing else going on, let’s go to the Japanese commentary team. I don’t speak Japanese so it’s all Greek to me. Back in and Nakamura drops a knee and hits some Good Vibrations as Mahal has nothing. As in all together, not just so far. The Singh Brothers offer a distraction though and Mahal knocks him off the apron to take over for the first time. Some knee drops set up a chinlock, followed by Mahal doing the COME ON pose but shouting his own name.

After that brilliant display of saying his name, it’s back to the chinlock. Nakamura fights up with a kick to the face and some YES Kicks to set up the running knee to the ribs. With the covers not working, Nakamura grabs a triangle choke but Mahal gets his foot in the ropes. Nakamura’s running knee in the corner hits buckle and Mahal adds a jumping knee to the face for two of his own. Mahal goes shoulder first into the post but the Singh Brothers’ distraction lets Mahal hit a chinlock slam (he has ONE MOVE and can’t even do that right) to retain at 11:25.

Rating: D-. You know, it’s been about nine months since Mahal lost the title and e-freaking-gads I had forgotten how awful his title reign really was. This felt like a bad house show main event and it’s the biggest Smackdown match on the second biggest show of the year. You can feel the fans dying out there when Mahal is….well doing anything actually, but in this case I’ll go with being on offense and winning. I remember watching Sami Zayn and Shinsuke Nakamura beat the living tar out of each other for twenty minutes at Takeover: Dallas. Now though, a weak/botched/terrible cobra clutch slam puts him down? Not a chance.

We recap the Universal Title match with Brock Lesnar defending against Braun Strowman, Roman Reigns and Samoa Joe. Lesnar was announced as facing all three challengers and since he wasn’t happy, he’s threatened to leave WWE if he loses. The three challengers all say they can be the man to take out Lesnar. There’s just not much else to be said here but this is by far and away the main event.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Braun Strowman vs. Samoa Joe

Lesnar is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Cole picks Reigns to win because Reigns beat Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Cole: “How can you bet against that?” You pick the guy who did it first, you nitwit. Reigns is of course booed out of the building because….oh you know the drill by now.

The brawl is on to start (well duh) with Strowman throwing Reigns to the floor and Brock hitting a belly to belly on Joe. Strowman gets posted and it’s time for the Reigns vs. Lesnar showdown that no one but WWE seems to love. Booker tries to say that Lesnar knew nothing but winning in UFC, which I’ll leave you to make fun of. Some suplexes put Reigns on the floor and it’s Strowman time.

Now THIS gets the fans’ attention but Reigns and Joe are right back in to break up the fun. That lasts all of five seconds before it’s back to Strowman vs. Lesnar, meaning another YES chant. Strowman LAUNCHES Brock into the corner and hits a heck of a clothesline to put the champ on the floor. As usual, Lesnar’s selling is very underrated. Everyone is on the floor now and Joe chokes Lesnar but sidesteps a Reigns spear, sending Lesnar through the barricade. That spot will always look cool.

Strowman is back up and loads up the title (with Graves hoping he uses Saxton as a weapon), setting up a running powerslam to drive a kicking Lesnar through it. The fans REALLY like that but here’s Reigns to kick Strowman in the face and kill their buzz all over again. Joe is back up with a suicide elbow to take Reigns out, meaning the fans are won right back. Thankfully Cole is doing a great job of explaining how cool it is to see people this big doing this stuff.

That’s exactly what he should be doing and it’s working here. Strowman throws an announcers’ chair at Joe and Reigns in a cool spot, followed by a second powerslam through a table to put Lesnar down again. Heyman has a look on his face that says “well, I didn’t see that one coming”. Fans: “ONE MORE TABLE!” Greedy twits. To mix things up a bit, Strowman picks that one up and turns it on top of the already out Lesnar. Half a dozen people come out to get the table off of Lesnar and a stretcher is brought out as Heyman seems to be near tears.

We’re not done yet though as Strowman hits Joe and Reigns in the head with the steps. With the steps in the ring, Reigns fires off the corner clotheslines and hits a good steps shot into Strowman’s shoulder. Joe’s rollup gets two on Reigns but he’s right back up with a Samoan drop for two. The Superman Punch is countered into the Koquina Clutch but Strowman (with some blood next to his ear) is back in with a double chokeslam. Everyone is down so here comes Lesnar again.

Strowman is the only one on his feet so it’s time for the big showdown. A running clothesline takes Strowman to the floor and there’s a German suplex each to Joe and Reigns. Strowman comes back in and elbow his way out of a German suplex, only to get caught in the Kimura. That’s broken up with a Superman Punch, with Joe and Lesnar taking one each as well. Reigns spears Lesnar for two so here’s Strowman for a dropkick to Reigns, just because he can do that too.

The powerslam gets two on Joe with Lesnar pulling the referee out at the last second. A Superman Punch gets two on Strowman, whose kickout puts Reigns on his feet. There’s a powerslam to Reigns with Lesnar making the save but getting loaded up into the F5. That’s broken up by a Reigns spear, drawing Joe back in for a Clutch on Lesnar. Brock reverses into the F5 but Reigns is right in there with some Superman Punches. Three in a row put Lesnar down but the spear is countered into the F5 to retain Brock’s title at 20:53.

Rating: A-. What a fight and that’s all it needed to be. They were making Godzilla/King Kong references here and they nailed the idea to near perfection. The best thing here was Strowman looking awesome and like the man that could beat Lesnar if he had the chance, with the bonus of Reigns taking the fall again. It’s not like Reigns losing was going to hurt him (it hasn’t yet) so going this was was the right call. This was all about violence and that was the story: big, strong people beating each other up for twenty minutes and all of the chaos that it caused. Well done, all around.

Lesnar can barely stand to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show suffered from the same problem as the modern Wrestlemania. It’s not the length that is the problem (the show never really did drag) but rather that almost nothing has a chance to sink in. Everything jumped from one match to the other and most of the matches didn’t have a ton of time.

It was “well that happened so let’s move on” time after time and that doesn’t make for a special show. The show isn’t terrible but aside from the main event, nothing on here felt important and that’s not what Summerslam needs to be. In other words: cut some stuff out and let it breathe, which might as well be the standard operating criticism around here.

Ratings Comparison

Miz/Miztourage vs. Hardy Boyz/Jason Jordan

Original: C-
Redo: C

Neville vs. Akira Tozawa

Original: C

Redo: C+

New Day vs. Usos

Original: B+

Redo: B

John Cena vs. Baron Corbin

Original: D

Redo: D+

Naomi vs. Natalya

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Big Cass vs. Big Show

Original: D

Redo: F+

Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Alexa Bliss vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B-

Redo: C

Bray Wyatt vs. Finn Balor

Original: C+

Redo: D

Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins vs. The Bar

Original: B

Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Samoa Joe vs. Braun Strowman

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: C-

Time has NOT been kind to this show and aside from two (or maybe three) matches, it’s not worth seeing.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/08/20/summerslam-2017-the-star-of-stars/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2003 (2018 Redo): Not His Match

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2003
Date: August 24, 2003
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 16,113
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s one of the biggest shows of the year and I can’t bring myself to get excited over it. This show really hasn’t been built up very well with only the Smackdown World Title match with Kurt Angle defending against Brock Lesnar offering much interest. The rest of the show feels very flat, especially the Raw World Title match which should have been Goldberg vs. HHH. Let’s get to it.

The United States Marine Corps Color Guard presents the flag and Lillian Garcia sings the National Anthem. As always, it’s an outstanding performance.

The opening video shows a beach but the sun goes behind a cloud and the shot shifts to the Elimination Chamber. The narration basically makes it sounds like the Chamber is poisoning everyone’s souls and turning them all evil, including Kane, who isn’t even in the thing. I’d bet money that Jim Ross wrote that, thinking it sounded even more dramatic than when he gives the Cell human characteristics.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance

La Resistance is defending and Bubba brings out the American flag. The Dudleys jump them in the aisle and the beatdown is on with D-Von choking Dupree with the robe. An armdrag into an armbar (FEEL THE HATRED!) doesn’t go very well as Dupree takes D-Von into the corner so the champs can take over. D-Von is right back with the shots to the head, allowing the tag off to the very loud Bubba. It might be annoying, but I can always go for a partner making noise and being active on the apron instead of just standing there.

Grenier gets tied in the Tree of Woe so Bubba can stand between his legs for a loud scream. It’s not quite table time, allowing Grenier to get in a cheap shot so the champs can really take over. Dupree grabs a bearhug, which is quite the odd visual on someone as big as Bubba. A Bubba Bomb gets him out of trouble though and the not very hot tag brings in D-Von for the house cleaning.

Dupree gets powerslammed for two but the champs clear the ring again. The double spinebuster gets two on D-Von (there’s the crowd reaction, and all it took was kicking out of the champs’ finisher). Bubba comes back in for the Flip, Flop and Fly, followed by What’s Up on Grenier. 3D connects but Grenier pulls the referee out, allowing a cameraman to deck D-Von with his camera, giving Dupree the pin. It’s the serviceman from Raw of course.

Rating: C-. The match was ok, but not exactly the hottest choice in the world for an opener. Having the Americans lose to the EVIL Frenchmen doesn’t quite get the show off on the right foot and now we’re likely to see another rematch between these teams as this feud to show off THE POWERS OF AMERICA continues. La Resistance is fine to hold the titles, but they need something more than “we are French and therefore evil”.

Post match Spike Dudley comes in and gets beaten down as well. So after the big American military opening and carrying the flag, the Dudleys lose to the heatless champions again. The Dudleys would get the belts back a month later, but instead we need to see them lose here. Of course we also needed this match instead of the World’s Greatest Tag Team, Rey Mysterio, John Cena or Christian.

Coach tries to talk to the Dudleys but makes the mistake of praising La Resistance’s success. Bubba declares that people who hate America suck and promises to get the belts back.

Christian asks Eric Bischoff why he’s not on the show but Eric blames Steve Austin. Since he can’t wrestle, he offers to be Bischoff’s backup tonight. Bischoff has a plan though and promises to tell the world what happened with Linda on Monday.

We recap A-Train running Stephanie McMahon over last month and costing her a match against Sable. This turned into A-Train vs. Undertaker and WWE actually expects us to believe that this isn’t going to turn into Sable vs. Stephanie again.

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Sable is with A-Train in a rather nice outfit. Undertaker has bad ribs so he dodges a bit to start instead of going in full steam ahead. Instead of staying on the ribs, A-Train tries a headlock, allowing Undertaker to knee him in the ribs and take over. The running DDT gets two on A-Train and Old School connects early on. A shot to the ribs finally cuts Undertaker off (thanks for finally getting the idea Train) and some forearms to the ribs are good for two.

A-Train stays on the ribs with a vertical suplex, followed by a headbutt. Cole: “It’s like being hit in the head with a typewriter.” Normally I would question that, but Cole is the kind of dolt who would do that for fun. Undertaker manages Snake Eyes and a double clothesline puts both guys down for a quick rest.

A slugout goes to Undertaker (well duh) and a big legdrop gets two. For some reason Undertaker tries the Last Ride but a shove gives us a ref bump. The Derailer of course gets a delayed two and the referee gets bumped again. That is way, WAY too popular of a booking trope these days. A-Train hits the bicycle kick to take Undertaker down but gets a chair kicked into his face for two. The chokeslam gives Undertaker the pin.

Rating: D. Matches against power guys like this can be Undertaker’s bread and butter but there’s only so much you can do to make A-Train interesting. The match wasn’t terrible and they kept it slow enough, but this Undertaker stands up for Stephanie thing is about as forced as you can get. There’s only so much you can do as a surrogate for Vince vs. Stephanie, especially when the best villain available for the spot is A-Train.

Post match Undertaker loads up the Last Ride but Sable comes in and rubs his chest. Undertaker grabs her by the throat and STEPHANIE IS BACK!!! WE CAN LIVE HAPPY LIVES AGAIN!!! Stephanie gets to do some catfighting until A-Train pulls Sable out. I guess this is what passes for a big moment around here.

Some fans in the front row think Goldberg is going to win the Chamber. Uh, thanks for that.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff, which starts off looking a lot like Shane vs. Kane. Bischoff then decided that he hated Shane for stealing WCW from him back in 2001. You know, because that’s a story people were thinking about. Eric went after Shane, including having Kane attack him and cost him a match against Eric.

Then Eric went to Connecticut and may have forced himself on Linda McMahon. It came out of almost nowhere and really was more of a complicated way to get to Kane vs. Shane. It’s more of WWE thinking you could just toss a McMahon into a story and everything would be fine, which doesn’t work as well when you do it in two straight matches.

Shane McMahon vs. Eric Bischoff

Before the match, Bischoff addresses what happened with Linda, saying it happened again and again and again. Now he knows where Shane gets all of his energy, so here’s Shane in a….complete non hurry actually. Shane pounds him down in the corner with reckless abandon (Or is it still Ruthless Aggression?), followed by some forearms to the ear (called crossfaces by JR).

Eric can’t make it up the aisle as Christian might be coming off like a good idea right about now. A baseball slide sends Eric into the barricade as this has been one sided so far. Shane’s dancing punches take Bischoff down again but the Coach of all people comes in to chair Shane down. Let me make sure I’ve got this straight: Bischoff thought COACH was a better option than the Intercontinental Champion? I get that they want to protect Christian from having to get beaten up by Shane but that makes no sense from Bischoff’s perspective.

Eric says he’s restarting the match as falls count anywhere with no disqualifications so Coach sends Shane into the steps for two. They head inside where Bischoff tells the production staff to cut JR and King’s microphones so Coach can do live commentary in the ring. Bischoff throws kicks as Coach does the traditional job of mocking JR. Shane finally gets in a kick of his own and scores with a DDT, only to have Coach hit him low.

That’s enough to make the glass shatter, as everyone knew was coming. Coach does the “I’m not touching you” thing until Shane shoves him into Austin, meaning the beatdown can be on. The dispatching doesn’t take long and Austin orders JR and King’s mics be turned on again. Austin is about to leave but Shane grabs Bischoff’s hand and slaps Austin in the jaw, meaning a Stunner is perfectly acceptable. Shane pulls him up at two though, as the big elbow drives Bischoff through the announcers’ table for the pin.

Rating: F. What did this accomplish? There’s no reason this couldn’t have been the end of Monday Night Raw as the big deal was Coach turning heel. Use this valuable pay per view time (some of the biggest pay per view time of the year) on the people who matter, not for the sake of making Kane look good because he never gets to do that otherwise. This was really annoying, especially when you consider everything that was left off the show so this could get a lot of time.

Beer is consumed post match because this hasn’t eaten up enough time yet.

HHH and Ric Flair get very serious with Randy Orton, telling him that he needs to focus on keeping the title on HHH and nothing more. Orton: “What? I got it.”

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri vs. Rhyno

Eddie is defending under tornado rules and one fall to a finish. Tony Chimmel tells us that this is the four way for the US Title before telling us that this is the four way for the US Title. It’s a brawl to start with Eddie staying on the floor, which might not be the smartest move in the world here. With Tajiri sent outside, Benoit snaps the Crossface onto Rhyno, drawing Eddie in for the save. Rhyno clotheslines Tajiri for two and Eddie is there for the save again. Eddie gets triple teamed but Rhyno shifts over to Benoit for some reason.

A powerslam gives Rhyno two on Eddie as it’s still all over the place, albeit not at the fastest pace. Rhyno and Benoit are sent outside, leaving Tajiri to monkey flip Eddie for two. All four are back in with Rhyno superplexing Eddie for two with Tajiri making the save. Tajiri gets the same by kicking Benoit in the head but the champ saves this time. A headscissors puts Rhyno on the floor and Eddie’s rope walk hurricanrana gets two on Benoit.

Tajiri comes back in and gets caught in the Lasso From El Paso but Benoit quickly follows with a Crossface on Rhyno. Eddie isn’t sure what to do but Tajiri making the ropes makes his decision much easier. That earns Eddie a Crossface of his own until Rhyno and Tajiri break it up. Rhyno busts up Tajiri’s spine for two and it’s Benoit rolling some German suplexes to make Tajiri feel even worse.

Tajiri manages to get in one of his own though and bridges back for a close two, leaving everyone down at once. Back up and Tajiri gets Benoit in the Tarantula, leaving Rhyno to Gore Eddie. The problem is Eddie had the US Title in his hands to bust up Rhyno’s shoulder, leaving him down in pain. Benoit’s Swan Dive gets two as Tajiri dives in for a save, only to have both of them fall outside. Eddie sneaks in with a frog splash to pin Rhyno and retain the title.

Rating: B-. This was a good match that was trying hard to be great. There were a few too many dead spots in there though and they never hit a higher gear that they were capable of, but at least they did well with what they did. Eddie stealing the pin after cheating with the belt makes perfect sense for him and it’s the right idea to keep the title on him with the roll he’s currently on.

We look at Brock Lesnar destroying Zach Gowen, who will be out for a good while as a result.

Earlier tonight on Heat, Matt Hardy accepted a forfeit win over Gowen.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle. Brock beat Angle for the title at Wrestlemania and Angle went on the shelf. While he was out, Angle and Lesnar became friends, which lead them to Vengeance where Angle won the title back in a triple threat. A few weeks later, Lesnar turned on Angle to join forces with Vince in the name of being the REAL Brock Lesnar. Brock attacked Angle in a cage and left him laying, which has only ticked Angle off coming in to the title match.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Brock is challenging and we actually get an old school rules explanation from the referee. They hit the mat to start with Angle getting the better of it (not exactly shocking) and frustrating Lesnar early on. Another takedown looks to set up the ankle lock but Kurt goes to a headlock that Brock can break far more easily. Odd thinking there. Back up and Brock shoves him away without too much effort so Angle armdrags Lesnar outside, frustrating Brock all over again.

Kurt follows him outside and starts in on Brock’s knee before sending him into the barricade. Back in and the first suplex gets two on Brock, who responds by gorilla pressing him out to the floor in a big crash (great visual with Angle just falling to the floor). Now it’s Brock’s turn for a suplex as he’s starting to look all surly. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Kurt and we hit the rear naked choke before that meant much to a lot of fans. It’s off to a regular bodyscissors instead, followed by a chinlock.

Of course Angle fights up (after Brock let go of two better holds), this time being cut down by a hard knee to the ribs. A hard clothesline drops Angle again and the move that would become known as Shell Shock (complete with walking around the ring) gives Brock two. Some shoulders in the corner stay on Angle’s ribs so Kurt hits him in the face. You don’t do that to Lesnar though and Angle gets more shoulders to his ribs for his efforts.

Brock’s big running charge goes into the post though and Kurt’s running shoulder block staggers Lesnar. A dropkick to the knee has Brock in more trouble and it’s time to roll the German suplexes (with Lesnar holding the shoulder off each one). The Angle Slam doesn’t work and Brock goes back to the ribs with a spinebuster. Since one finisher is countered, the other has to be as well so Kurt reverses the F5 into a good looking DDT for two of his own. Now the Angle Slam is good for two and Angle is even more fired up.

In my favorite Angle spot, he puts the straps back up so he can take them down all over again. The ankle lock goes on but Brock rolls forward, sending Angle into the referee. Kurt charges at him for what looks like a sunset flip but stops halfway, wrapping his legs around Brock’s neck and arm (almost in an upside down triangle choke). Since that’s not the easiest hold to maintain, Angle switches over to the ankle lock for the tap but there’s no referee.

Cue Vince to chair Angle in the back, setting up the F5 for a delayed two. Another F5 is reversed into the ankle lock to put Brock in real trouble. He grabs all four bottom ropes but the hold isn’t broken for absolutely no apparent reasons, meaning Brock has to tap to retain Angle’s title.

Rating: B+. It’s not quite their Wrestlemania match but Angle getting his win back makes sense….in theory. They’ve been building Lesnar up as the unstoppable monster for the last few weeks so it would have made sense to have him win here (with Vince’s help) before losing the rematch down the line. That being said, I’m fine with Angle retaining here as it makes sense from the long term. In other words, this one depends on how you look at it, but it’s a rather strong match either way.

Vince gets an Angle Slam through a chair to wish him a happy birthday.

We recap Kane vs. Rob Van Dam. Kane lost his mask and despite Van Dam trying to calm him down and say that he didn’t need the mask, Kane went crazy and started destroying everything in his path. This included beating up Van Dam, Shane McMahon and Linda McMahon and setting Jim Ross on fire. This seems to be setting up Kane vs. Shane, but first Van Dam gets his shot tonight.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

No Holds Barred, which is added right before the match. JR refers to Kane as the “byproduct of an inbred mongrel dog”. As I so often wonder of both JR and Jim Cornette: WHERE DO THEY COME UP WITH THIS STUFF??? Van Dam tries to start fast but gets clotheslined down in short order. They head outside with Kane sending him into the barricade but charging into a boot, allowing Rob to follow up with another kick to the face.

Van Dam gets posted though and it’s time for a ladder. Rob is smart enough to kick it into his face, followed by a top rope kick to the chest. A crossbody puts them both on the floor and of course Kane takes over again. The announcers talk about what Kane did to Linda, which is both a good and bad idea. It’s good in that it shows you what Kane is capable of and how evil he is, but it also shows you how unimportant this match is because it’s all about Shane vs. Kane down the line.

Back in and another kick to Kane’s face knocks him into the corner (there’s certainly a pattern here) as JR deems Kane smelly. Kane shoves Rob off the top and down onto the barricade as the violence starts to go the monster’s way again. The ladder to the face drops Rob again and it’s time for some simple choking. Thankfully the referee doesn’t break it up because that comes off as barring a hold, which might get a lawyer involved with his life.

Rob gets kicked outside again and this time Kane follows by going to the top, only to dive into the barricade by mistake (that looked bad on replay as Kane seemed to slip, leaving him without enough distance and sending him head first into the barricade). Now it’s Rob getting in a ladder shot, which Kane of course shrugs off.

A DDT on the floor knocks Rob silly but he’s able to drop toehold Kane into the steps. The spinning kick from the apron drops Kane again, followed by Rolling Thunder onto the chair. Kane sits up so Rob dropkicks the chair into his face for good measure. The Van Terminator misses though and a Tombstone onto the steps is enough to end Rob.

Rating: B. Nice brawl here but I couldn’t shake the feeling that it didn’t mean anything given the story they’ve already told us is coming. Rob was trying here though and made the match fun, especially with the story of the wrestling going to Van Dam and the hardcore stuff going to Kane, but we’re heading for Kane vs. Shane and everyone knows it.

Bischoff is banged up and doesn’t want to talk about his loss but Linda McMahon comes in. Eric starts stammering and gets slapped in the face as the billionaire gets revenge. I can totally relate.

Flair gives HHH a final pep talk.

The Chamber is lowered.

Long recap on the main event, which also features a look at the Chamber. HHH was scheduled to defend against Goldberg one on one but a torn groin necessitated a multi-person match because Heaven forbid HHH take a spear and Jackhammer and lose in a short match with the excuse that he wasn’t ready or was wrestling hurt or any other idea they had. Somehow we get Kevin Nash in another main event though, because that’s what the world was waiting for. There have been some personal issues added after the match announcement but it still feels a little thrown together.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Goldberg vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Nash

The intervals are three minutes this year because we need to move this along. Goldberg slips during his entrance, which is edited out of the Network version (though he goes from standing in the middle of the stage to a few steps to the right off a camera cut). Shawn and Jericho start us off as the fans chant for Goldberg. They hit the mat to start for the Flair pinfall reversal sequence before trading slaps.

Shawn backdrops him but has to switch to a small package to escape the Walls attempt. Jericho can’t hit the Lionsault so instead we’ll listen to JR mess up history by saying this title has only changed hands once before in Arizona. That’s some nice sounding trivia, but remember that this title isn’t even a year old yet and has its own lineage. Sure that doesn’t mean much, but this is the way WWE has set things up and they can’t keep it straight. Anyway, Orton is in third with a high crossbody for two on Shawn, followed by the signature backbreaker gets the same on Jericho.

The RKO is broken up though and Jericho backdrops Orton onto the steel. Now the Walls work just fine on Shawn but it’s Kevin Nash in fourth. That’s enough for Jericho to break it up and go after Nash, who isn’t happy with his new haircut. I find it rather spiffy, even as Nash throws Jericho into the Chamber wall. Nash’s side slam gets two on Orton and Jericho is busted open. Nash goes over for a Jackknife, only to get superkicked down, allowing Jericho to roll him up for the pin, meaning Nash was in there for all of two minutes.

HHH is in fifth….and Shawn superkicks him right back into the pod. Nash isn’t done yet though and Jackknifes Jericho and Orton as a parting gift. Shawn, who is down off throwing a superkick, covers both villains for two each. Everyone punches it out until Goldberg is in to complete the field. Right hands and forearms abound and it’s the spear to get rid of Orton in short order. Jericho gets launched onto the cage floor again and another spear sends him through the Plexiglas.

As Goldberg gets back in, Shawn scores with a forearm followed by the top rope elbow. Sweet Chin Music misses though and it’s a spear and Jackhammer to get us down to three. The same thing gets rid of Jericho and it’s HHH (who still hasn’t gotten out of the pod) vs. Goldberg for the title.

Flair shuts the pod again and holds it shut as well as he can, only to have Goldberg break the “unbreakable Plexiglas”. Some right hands keep HHH in trouble and Goldberg sends him into the Chamber walls a few times. A clothesline takes him down again and HHH is busted open. Goldberg loads up the spear but Flair slips HHH the sledgehammer to knock Goldberg cold and the title is retained.

Rating: D. This wasn’t even twenty minutes long. The best way to describe this match would be a middle finger to the fans who are nearly dying to see HHH lose that freaking title already but we need to make sure he’s ready to give Goldberg the rub or something. I’m not sure how WWE can validate keeping the title on HHH when they have Goldberg right there and HHH can barely move, but I’m sure it’s just the right thing to do, at least according to HHH. That’s 2003 in a nutshell: cheer for whomever you want, but you get HHH.

The rest of the match was of course nothing because Goldberg was the only person who could conceivably win the thing. Instead of something competitive and compelling, it was fifteen minutes of waiting around on Goldberg, then Goldberg crushing people for a few minutes, and then HAHA IT’S THE SLEDGEHAMMER AGAIN! The ending was so deflating that there’s not

Evolution beats Goldberg down and handcuffs him to the Chamber because WWE needs to demonstrate how to book Goldberg.

Overall Rating: D. The show isn’t even that bad, but rather almost completely flat. There are a few good matches with Brock vs. Angle being a highlight but that just made me want to watch the Wrestlemania match again. The TV coming into this show has been really dull due to a lot of McMahons and while they were used more sparingly here, you could still feel them throughout the whole show. That main event really took the life out of the whole thing though and there was nothing else that was going to fix things. Not a good show, but it could have been worse.

Ratings Comparison

La Resistance vs. Dudley Boys

Original: C

2013 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: C-

A-Train vs. Undertaker

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D

Eric Bischoff vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

2013 Redo: N/A

2018 Redo: F

Rhyno vs. Tajiri vs. Chris Benoit vs. Eddie Guerrero

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B+

2018 Redo: B-

Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B

2018 Redo: B+

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: B

HHH vs. Goldberg vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Nash vs. Randy Orton

Original: D

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2018 Redo: D

That’s one of the hardest swings I’ve ever had on a show but you can see a little consistency in there somewhere.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/06/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2003-brock-vs-angle-ii/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/08/summerslam-count-up-2003-meet-the-old-hhh-same-as-the-new-hhh/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 1994 (2018 Redo): One Of The Great Ones

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 1994
Date: August 29, 1994
Location: United Center, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 23,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

This is the old review of the year and that’s an interesting choice. The show has a double main event of WWF World Champion Bret Hart defending against his brother Owen to continue their awesome feud, plus the wholly unawesome Undertaker vs. Fake Undertaker match. It’s the best of both worlds you see. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Randy Savage to welcome us to the show, held in the brand new United Center. Somehow, this is the only pay per view the company has ever run from the arena.

Jerry Lawler has some breaking news: Shawn Michaels and Diesel have become the new Tag Team Champions after defeating the Headshrinkers last night. What an odd time to do a title change, but 1994 was an odd time.

IRS/Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Headshrinkers

IRS and Bigelow have Ted DiBiase in their corner and this was originally going to be a title match. The Headshrinkers (Samu/Fatu) have Afa and Lou Albano with them, just to crank up the bizarre state of the show so far. Bigelow runs Fatu (not Samu Vince, though to be fair it’s a pretty easy mistake to make) over with a shoulder but eats the superkick for two. Fatu avoids a very early top rope headbutt and a double superkick puts Bigelow down again. Samu comes in, so Vince says Samu is now in, after saying Samu started.

Vince really wasn’t great at this whole thing. Samu starts cleaning house and ducks an IRS charge to send him outside. Back in and Bigelow low bridges Fatu to the floor but it’s a double clothesline for a double knockdown. The hot(ish) tag brings Samu back in for a BAAAACK body drop and a headbutt to Bigelow, which works because Samoans have hard heads. The middle rope headbutt gets two on IRS with Bigelow making a save. With Bigelow being knocked to the floor, the double Stroke sets up the Superfly Splash but Bigelow goes after Albano. That’s enough to draw Afa in for the DQ at 7:18.

Rating: D+. Pretty lame opener here with the lack of the titles taking away the little interest this match had. The Headshrinkers are good in their roles but Bigelow and IRS are a pretty generic team who don’t have much to do here. I’m still not sure what the point is in having the titles change early. Why not just do it the next night on Raw?

They brawl to the back.

And now, for your comedy of the show. The detectives from the Naked Gun movies are trying to find the Undertaker, complete with a bunch of puns and sight gags. Such gems include “we’re both on the case” as they stand on a briefcase.

Women’s Title: Bull Nakano vs. Alundra Blayze

Blayze is defending and Nakano has Luna Vachon in her corner. For those of you of a younger age, Nakano is a rather terrifying Japanese monster and Blayze’s archnemesis. We get the ceremonial flower presentation but Vachon throws hers at Blayze to really be a jerk. Nakano kicks her in the ribs instead of shaking hands but it’s too early for a powerbomb. A knee to the ribs cuts the champ off and Nakano throws her down by the hair.

We hit the chinlock (with Nakano’s back to the camera because she doesn’t know how to work) until Blayze makes the rope, which isn’t an escape you see that often. The yet to be named hurricanrana gives Blayze two but Nakano pulls her down into a Boston crab with both legs under one arm. With that broken up, Nakano puts on what would become Paige’s Scorpion Crosslock.

Since Blayze hasn’t been tortured enough yet, Nakano switches to a cross armbreaker. Back up and three straight running sleeper drops have Nakano in trouble but she powers out of a piledriver attempt. A powerbomb gets two on the champ as the pace has picked WAY up out of nowhere. Blayze avoids the guillotine legdrop though, kicks Vachon down and grabs the German suplex to retain at 8:17.

Rating: B. For 1994, this was some insane stuff in America, especially for a women’s match. Blayze really was good but Nakano was one of the best of the era. She was big, strong, could wrestle on the mat and had the submission skills to be that dominant. Unfortunately these two pretty much the entire division for a long time so it could only go so far.

Shawn Michaels and Diesel brag about winning the titles because the Heartbreak Hotel needed some more gold. Diesel says Razor Ramon isn’t taking one of his two titles tonight. Razor has had a bunch of chances and tonight isn’t going to change anything.

Intercontinental Title: Razor Ramon vs. Diesel

Razor is challenging and has NFL Hall of Famer Walter Payton in his corner to balance out Shawn. The white boots are a weird look for Razor. Shawn talks trash to Payton to start and Razor fires off the right hands, which look very good against someone Diesel’s size. Back in after a quick trip to the floor and Diesel gets in his own punches to take over. A sleeper slows Razor down even more and Diesel throws him outside.

Shawn goes for the turnbuckle pad but Payton chases him off, allowing Shawn to forearm Razor behind the referee’s back. I could watch Shawn outsmart people for days. Back in again and the referee stands in front of the exposed buckle but Shawn’s second distraction allows Razor to be whipped in. Diesel hits Snake Eyes onto an unexposed buckle as Lawler thinks the pad fell off the other one. A chinlock with a knee to the back keeps Razor in trouble and a big boot knocks his head off.

We hit the abdominal stretch, which at least looks more painful than a chinlock with a knee in the back. Diesel grabs the rope, making me wish we had Bobby Heenan there to explain why it’s more to avoid a hiptoss counter than to add more leverage. Razor gets out and sends Diesel ribs first into the exposed buckle, sending Lawler into hysterics as it should.

The middle rope bulldog (the Hall Buster) gets two and there’s a right hand to knock Shawn off the apron for a great over the top sell. A flying shoulder gives Diesel a breather so Shawn goes after the belt. Payton goes after him again and of course the referee yells, allowing Shawn to superkick Diesel by mistake. Shawn gets pulled outside and Razor finally crawls over for the pin to get the title back at 15:01.

Rating: B-. I’ve always had a mixed reaction to this one as the match itself is pretty good but Payton being out there was just a celebrity cameo that could have been anyone. Razor getting the title back was the right call as Shawn and Diesel are already having issues. They could have cut a few minutes out here, but what we got was still good enough and didn’t get sunk by the extra time.

Diesel yells at Shawn all the way to the back.

Savage talks about what we just saw.

Lex Luger and Tatanka are in the back. A fan poll has 54% saying that Luger sold out to Ted DiBiase and Tatanka is tired of hearing Luger deny it. We see a montage of DiBiase and Luger getting very close, but Luger still swears there’s nothing going on because DiBiase is lying. Tatanka is going to prove his story in the ring tonight.

Lex Luger vs. Tatanka

There’s no DiBiase to start. Feeling out process to start with Luger running him over but not following up. Tatanka’s armbar has no effect so Luger puts him down again, only to miss the jumping elbow (as always). That means we get more of Tatanka’s lame offense, including the top rope chop to the head. The second attempt gets punched out of the air and Luger starts in with the clotheslines. Cue DiBiase with a gym bag as Luger hits a powerslam. DiBiase pulls money out of the bag as Luger yells at him, allowing Tatanka to grab a rollup for the pin at 6:02.

Rating: D. This was all about the storyline instead of the wrestling and that’s not surprising. Neither Luger nor Tatanka were going to have a good match at this point so the story was the only way this was going to work. Tatanka was a fine midcard hand but if he had even a slightly better offense, he could have been a much bigger deal. There comes a point where you need the wrestling to back up the character and that just wasn’t the case for him.

Post match Luger kicks the money out of DiBiase’s hands so Tatanka jumps him from behind, revealing that he sold out. I’ve always liked that story, as bad as the match was. What I don’t like is how long this goes on, as Tatanka beats him up three different times, capped off by the Million Dollar Dream. We get the money in Luger’s mouth for a little old school touch.

Gorilla Monsoon is aghast at what we just saw. Agreed. That money must be filthy.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mabel

This is going to be a disaster. During the entrances, Vince and Jerry debate the detectives’ skills and if Lawler has any rhythm. Mabel tosses away a wristlock attempt (Jarrett’s sell is quite good) and drops the big elbow when Jarrett tries a drop down. A clothesline puts Jarrett on the floor so he shoves the rapping Oscar. That’s not going to get him booed as Oscar isn’t very good. Back in and Jeff scores with some middle rope ax handles but Mabel crushes him in the corner.

The spinwheel kick (the one good thing that Mabel could do) gets two as Abe Knuckleball Schwartz (the Brooklyn Brawler as a baseball player) is on strike in the crowd. This adds nothing and isn’t funny or interesting, but it’s a thing that happens. Sounds like 1994 as a whole. They head outside with Oscar getting in a slap and Mabel splashing Jeff against the post. Back in and the middle rope splash misses, followed by a missed sitdown splash to give Jeff the pin at 5:57.

Rating: F. Oh what were you expecting here? Mabel was fat and useless while Jarrett wasn’t exactly someone who was going to carry anyone at this point, especially someone that big. This should have been on Raw at best and comes off as terrible filler here. Mainly because that’s what it was.

Vince introduces the detectives in the aisle, blowing their cover. Undertaker’s silhouette appears in the entrance but they don’t see him. Because they’re bad at their jobs you see.

We recap Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart. This started way back in 1993 when Owen was the only Hart eliminated at the Survivor Series, which he blamed on Bret. Owen and Bret then teamed up to try and win the Tag Team Titles, but Bret wouldn’t tag out when injured, leading to a referee stoppage.

They went on to have a classic at Wrestlemania X with Owen pinning Bret clean. Bret won the WWF World Title later in the night and the feud was on for the rest of the summer. Owen even won the King of the Ring (just like his brother the previous year) to earn another title shot. Tonight is the big blowoff inside a cage. This really was a great feud as you could see Owen’s point all along and it built up perfectly over time.

Earlier today, Owen and crony Jim Neidhart (Bret’s former partner) were in the cage and promised to destroy Bret once and for all tonight.

Bret is going to forget they’re family tonight because Owen will be crying a river of tears, just like he did when he was a baby.

The Hart Family, including Davey Boy Smith, is at ringside and Helen can’t believe this is happening. Stu hopes the best wrestler wins and sounds as only he can. Lawler accuses both of them of causing all of this and thinks Smith will turn on Bret again. Lawler: “Wouldn’t you love to be in there with Bret again tonight?” Smith: “Uh, not really.” Neidhart is behind Smith and says we’ll see Owen prove that he’s the better man once and for all. Bruce Hart spins around and says stay out of this.

Bret, recovering from strep throat, says his condition won’t change anything tonight. What we’re going to see tonight is barbaric and nothing like what they did when they were kids. Everyone wants things to end tonight and Bret is going to finish it to heal his family.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

Bret is defending in a cage with escape only to win. Owen goes right at him to start and hammers away during the entrances, followed by some hard right hands to the head. You can see Helen panicking over the whole thing and a DDT by Bret makes things even worse. It’s too early to escape though and Owen scores with some headbutts, followed by an enziguri to really rock Bret. He’s fine enough to suplex Owen off the cage and it’s a double knockdown.

Owen goes for the door so Bret bends him around the ropes for a save and drags him right back in. They’re setting up a good feel here with both of them going for the escape and being pulled back for more punishment. That ties in the idea of wanting to hurt each other but wanting to be the better man even more, which is really what this is all about. They both wind up on the top rope and slug it out with Owen knocking him down.

Instead of getting the easy climb out though, Owen comes back with a missile dropkick into a nipup. Both make some fast climbs up the cage but get pulled down for a crash each. A collision gives us another double knockdown as they’re taking their time building the drama, mainly because they’ve got the time to do so. It’s still too early for Owen to get out the door as Bret pulls him out, only to get pulled back down from the top for a hard crotching.

Bret is up fast enough for the headbutt between the legs but Owen pulls him down again. Owen gets closer to getting out than any other attempt yet, even getting his feet and legs out of the cage. Bret pulls him back in and sends Owen face first into the cage for a big knockdown. This time the climb is cut off by a belly to back superplex as the crashes and falls are getting bigger and bigger. A good piledriver plants Bret but he’s fine enough to catch a tired Owen again.

They both fall off the ropes this time for a breather until Bret catapults him face first into the cage. Owen has to literally dive over for a save and sends Bret into the cage, with the champ coming up holding his knee. The knee is fine enough to climb up and kick Owen away but he gets pulled back down by the arm.

Owen gets out again and you can feel the fans quiet down as he gets close. He’s pulled back in yet again and Bret kicks him down to the mat but it’s Owen’s turn for a last second save. Bret catches him in the corner and pulls Owen back down with a huge superplex (Bret always had a great one) and they’re both down again. Owen is up first with a Sharpshooter but Bret reverses into one of his own.

A little cranking has Owen down but, say it with me, he lunges over for the save by pulling Bret down hair first. They both climb and this time make it over the top, leaving them hanging on the side. Bret hits him in the ribs, causing Owen to slip and get tied up in the cage wall. That’s enough for Bret to drop down and retain at 32:18.

Rating: A+. I’ve had to say this about several Bret matches before but the wrestling isn’t the point here. This was all about telling a great story and that’s what we got. The thing to remember here is that they don’t hate each other but rather Owen wants to prove he’s better and Bret wants to shut Owen up. It explains why they weren’t trying to kill each other in what is usually a violent match. Instead, they were trying to win, which should be the case in most matches and especially one like this. Notice how the match ends: not with a big spot, but with Bret being one step better than Owen, which is the point of the feud.

It is slower paced and it does feel like they’re doing the same things over and over, but it’s a case of WHY they’re doing the same things over and over. They’re not trying to destroy each other and it really is about being the better man. Owen has gone off the deep end with trying to beat Bret, but it never felt like he wanted to hurt him. That might not make for the most exciting match, but it’s how things should have gone when you think about it.

Post match Neidhart jumps the barricade and clotheslines Davey, knocking him into his wife. Neidhart locks himself inside the cage and the double beatdown is on as Owen has completely snapped. The Hart Brothers storm the cage (always cool) but Owen keeps knocking them off. Davey finally punches Owen down (for a great bump) and gets in, sending Owen and Neidhart running as the rest of the brothers get inside as well.

In the back, Owen and Neidhart yell about how Owen should be the winner and Davey isn’t family. Owen: “Let’s go celebrate my victory!”

Survivor Series ad, making fun of football. Considering how meh that show was, I wouldn’t go that way.

We recap the Undertaker vs. Undertaker. Back in January, Undertaker was destroyed by about a dozen guys and put in a casket. Not to worry as he ascended out of the casket in one of the most ridiculous things you’ll ever see in wrestling. After being gone for several months (aside from some sightings, including by a young child in school), Ted DiBiase said he had seen Undertaker. Paul Bearer said no way but DiBiase brought him back, only to reveal that it was a fake Undertaker (played by Brian Adams, better known as Chainz). The lack of about three inches was a, ahem, dead giveaway.

With Undertaker succumbing to the power of money, Bearer went to the graveyard and said he had the real Undertaker again. After the lights went out one night on the King’s Court (Todd Pettengill: “Look at that brain surgeon Jerry Lawler.”), the real Undertaker said he was back and not with DiBiase. He would be around this coming Monday (at Summerslam) against whatever DiBiase had with him. This video gets well over five minutes as we need to get rid of the cage.

Undertaker vs. Undertaker

For the sake of simplicity, I’ll identify them by the colors of their gloves: gray for the fake one and purple for the real. DiBiase brings his man to the ring but Bearer comes out with just a casket. There’s nothing inside though and the casket is wheeled to the back. Instead Bearer opens the Urn to reveal a light….and here’s the real Undertaker. That certainly seems to be worth the wait for the fans.

Purple shrugs off some forearms to the back and leapfrogs (!) gray, who falls to the floor. Gray stalks Bearer and gets suplexed back inside for his troubles, only to be sent right back to the floor. A Stunner over the top staggers Purple but Old School just isn’t happening. The real Old School connects and now Lawler believes Bearer has the real thing.

Purple misses a charge and falls to the floor as Vince defends the silent crowd. More right hands from gray don’t have much effect but a good looking chokeslam gets….no cover. Gray goes with a Tombstone for no cover again as he spends too long pointing at DiBiase. Purple hits a Tombstone of his own, followed by a second for good measure. A third finally gives purple the pin at 9:10.

Rating: F. Well what was that supposed to be? The biggest problem here is the match was really, really bad with the Tombstone being the only thing worthwhile from the fake Undertaker. That leaves you with about eight minutes of lumbering forearms and right hands as the fans had no idea what to make of anything because there was nothing to get excited about. This would have been much easier to sit through if it didn’t come after twenty minutes of build and a great cage match. For the life of me I’m not sure how they thought this was going to work, but it failed miserably.

Gray gets put in the casket and purple poses before the Urn’s flashlight.

Savage wraps the show up but throws it to the detectives, who find a briefcase. “The case is closed.” That ends the show. Summerslam mind you, ends on a sight gag. I remember watching this live and my dad tried to explain the joke to me because at six years old, this went flying over my head. What a great way to end a show.

Overall Rating: D+. It’s certainly not the worst show as there’s enough good stuff to carry it past horrible, but my goodness they didn’t do themselves any favors here. There’s a reason that 1994 was one of the worst years in company history and this show was a good example. With the fake main event being such a mess, they’re lucky to have an instant classic in the real main event to bail it out. It’s watchable, but be ready to fast forward a lot.

Ratings Comparison

IRS/Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Headshrinkers

Original: C+
2013 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Alundra Blayze vs. Bull Nakano

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2018 Redo: B

Razor Ramon vs. Diesel

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: B-

Lex Luger vs. Tatanka

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mabel

Original: D-

2013 Redo: D-

2018 Redo: F

Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

Original: A

2013 Redo: A+

2018 Redo: A+

Undertaker vs. Undertaker

Original: B

2013 Redo: F

2018 Redo: F

Overall Rating

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: D+

I still don’t know how I got a B out of the main event before and I really liked the women’s match more this time around. Other than that, it’s about the same all around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/28/history-of-summerslam-count-up-summerslam-1994-from-great-matches-to-leslie-nielsen/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/07/30/summerslam-count-up-1994-the-last-great-cage-match/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6