Survivor Series 1996
Date: November 17, 1996
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,647
Commentators: Jim Ross, Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

I had three options for an older redo this year (this one, 1988 and 1992) but this one had the most Survivor Series matches plus Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart, which was more than enough to sway me over. This is an interesting time for the company as they’re just starting to get squashed by WCW but the future is here tonight. Let’s get to it.

Free For All: Team Bart Gunn vs. Team Billy Gunn

Bart Gunn, Aldo Montoya, Bob Holly, Jesse James

Billy Gunn, Salvatore Sincere, Justin Bradshaw, The Sultan

This would be the Kickoff Show today. I’ve actually never reviewed this and there’s a chance I’ve never even seen it before. The team names are pretty arbitrary as there’s little rhyme or reason for these pairings, save for maybe the brothers, meaning no one is really a captain. James (Road Dogg of course) is a country singer here and the REAL Double J as part of a stupid angle with the departed Jeff Jarrett. Ok so I might have With My Baby Tonight (his self-performed theme song) on my iPod. At least the angle wasn’t a total loss.

As the Sultan (Rikishi) and Aldo (Justin Credible as a Portuguese man with a jockstrap for a mask) start us off, JR mentions that Austin vs. Hart is a #1 contenders match, which really wasn’t mentioned very often on the actual pay per view. Montoya actually does some damage to Sultan by dropkicking him out to the floor but a cover results in him being launched off. A bad looking piledriver sets up the camel clutch and Montoya is eliminated in a hurry.

Holly comes in with a bulldog as we see Aldo walk up the ramp opposite the cameras (an MSG standard). Sultan grabs a chinlock and we take a break to come back with Sultan slamming Bart on the floor so Sincere (a flamboyant yet still generic Italian) can baseball slide him in the face. Back in and Bart grabs a side slam to get rid of Sincere and tie the match up.

Bradshaw (who JR says is going to be something special) comes in and kicks the freshly tagged Holly in the face. We go to a split screen to see Austin running Dok Hendrix out of his dressing room and come back to Bradshaw hitting the Clothesline From an Undisclosed Location to eliminate Holly.

Jesse immediate rolls Bradshaw up for the elimination (ignore Billy kicking Jesse and breaking up the pin at two while the referee keeps counting anyway), leaving us with Jesse and Bart vs. Billy and Sultan. A rollup gets rid of Sultan but the Fameasser (yet to be named) does the same to Jesse. We’re down to a battle of the Gunns and Bart gets tied up in the ropes for some trash talking. Billy calls him an SOB, meaning he isn’t likely to get a Christmas card from his own mother. Bart stands up for Mama Gunn and hits a running forearm for the pin.

Rating: C-. This is a good example of a match where you have to consider the purpose. They weren’t trying to settle any big score here or blow the roof off the place. This was about getting the fans warmed up before we got to the real show and the fast pace did that well enough. Billy vs. Bart wasn’t anything interesting but at least it was a little story to tie things together. Nothing good but it did its job well enough.

The opening video looks at the WWF taking over New York (including the Hall of Fame banquet at a hotel, which would be the last one for seven and a half years) before going into a look at the two major matches. You know you have a stacked card when you’re getting hyped over two matches that don’t even include Undertaker vs. Mankind or any of the show’s namesake matches.

Team Furnas and Lafon vs. Team Owen Hart/British Bulldog

Doug Furnas, Phillip Lafon, Henry Godwinn, Phineas Godwinn

Owen Hart, British Bulldog, Marty Jannetty, Leif Cassidy

This is Furnas and Lafon’s WWF debut as they were brought in to challenge Owen and Bulldog for the Tag Team Titles. Marty and Lafon (I can never remember which is Furnas and which is Lafon) start things off with a nice little acrobatics display, capped off by a hard shot to Marty’s jaw. Leif comes in instead as the announcers talk about slander. The slow pace continues and it’s off to Phineas for a headlock. JR: “You ever see Hilary Clinton do that?”

For some reason Leif thinks it’s a good idea to slap Phineas in the face and spit on him. Well to be fair, given all the sweat and liquid on his overalls, it’s not the worst idea in the world. Owen comes in to wake the crowd up and it’s time to pick Phineas apart. The heels start working Phineas over as JR wants a third referee out here.

Marty hits a good looking back elbow to the jaw as the announcers start talking about Bret, though at least they tie it in to Owen. Today that would go off on a tangent and turn into ripping on Byron Saxton. I mean, he deserves it but it’s still annoying. Marty goes up top so Phineas tries a superplex. JR: “Now how stupid was that?” Oh dang it I always forget how annoying heel JR is. Even heel Cole wasn’t this bad.

Henry comes in, kicks Marty in the gut, and Slop Drops him for the first elimination. Not that it means much as Owen rolls Henry up to tie the score five seconds later. Phineas cleans house (has a fit, whatever) but Bulldog makes a blind tag and powerslams him to go up 3-2. Furnas comes in to speed things WAY up (and turn up the quality as well), only to miss a dropkick, which JR calls one of the best in the business. Like I said, heel JR wasn’t the best.

Leif comes in to cover and the former powerlifter sends him flying on the kickout. The bad guys get smart with a blind tag and a springboard missile dropkick to wipe Furnas out in a great looking visual. JR goes into yet another rant about the referees not catching the heels cheating, which is a really weird complaint for a heel to have.

Cassidy misses a charge and Furnas brings in Lafon for a snappy looking reverse superplex to get us down to two on two. The lack of a reaction to Leif being eliminated really shouldn’t surprise anyone as he was just so out of place in this match. Owen comes in for a belly to belly and a middle rope elbow (both of those looked very smooth) for two. A low blow to Furnas has Vince freaking out but JR, the heel commentator here, lets it go right past him. Again: it was a bad character and you could sense he wasn’t a fan of the whole thing.

It’s back to Bulldog who is quickly sunset flipped for the elimination, which is a big deal as it means Furnas and Lafon can pin Owen and the Bulldog in a two on two match. Bulldog leaves Lafon with a parting gift of a chop block though and Owen follows it up with the Sharpshooter. Furnas is in for the save and hits that dropkick of his (basically a dropkick with a backflip), followed by a German suplex for the final pin.

Rating: B. This was more like it for the opener as they set up the next challengers for the Tag Team Titles, though the first part with the Godwinns really brings it down. It also doesn’t help that the crowd didn’t care for the most part, and can you really blame them? The good guys were people making their debuts and hog farmers. It’s good wrestling but not the brightest idea.

Paul Bearer insists he WILL NOT get into the cage and be hung above the ring. Mankind will crush Undertaker like the cockroaches he used to eat for dinner.

Undertaker vs. Mankind

Bearer is in an individual cage above the ring and if Undertaker wins, Bearer is his for five minutes. The entrance is an important one as Undertaker descends from the rafters and debuts the sleeveless leather attire that would become his signature look for the next several years. It marks the evolution of the original character to the newer, sleeker fighting machine that could hurt people at will.

It’s a brawl to start (duh) with Undertaker using a drop toehold (?!?!?) followed by a fireman’s carry into a cross armbreaker. Undertaker gets smart by working over Mankind’s hand, which JR thinks is illegal. Mankind takes it into the crowd and is quickly backdropped right back to ringside but pops up for a cannonball off the apron. There’s something to be said about someone launching their body at someone else.

Undertaker’s comeback is cut off by a Texas piledriver and the Mandible Claw goes on. Undertaker is smart enough to send Mankind straight outside for the save and both guys are spent from the physicality. A kick to the chest sends Mankind flying hard into the barricade for a sick sounding THUD. You just can’t fake that kind of brutality. Well you can but it’s easier to believe it’s real with Foley.

Old School is broken up so Undertaker opts to punch Mankind in the face multiple times. The chokeslam is countered with the Claw, only to be countered by a big chokeslam with the camera going wide for an awesome visual. Mankind is back up though (as always) and pulls out a spike to stab Undertaker a bit. Amazingly enough, Undertaker doesn’t care to be stabbed and Tombstones Mankind for the pin instead.

Rating: B. This was a BIG change of pace for Undertaker as he was moving faster and acting like a much more well rounded wrestler, which he would be for a long time. These two were solid together as always as they just beat the heck out of each other for long stretches of time and that’s always worth a watch. This is one of their lesser known matches but it’s certainly entertaining.

Post match the cage is lowered and Undertaker goes right for Bearer, only to have the Executioner run out for the save, allowing Bearer to escape. That would be Undertaker’s next match before he continued attempting to murder Bearer and Mankind.

Sunny comes out to replace Lawler on commentary. When you look at so many of the women who would come after her, Sunny really is remarkable. She looks great but she’s also dripping with charisma, which so few women (or men for that matter) have at this level.

Team Helmsley laughs off the idea of Team Marc Mero because they’re a man down due to Mark Henry being injured.

Team Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Team Marc Mero

Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jerry Lawler, Goldust, Crush

Marc Mero, The Stalker, Rocky Maivia, Jake Roberts

There’s a lot to cover here. Helmsley is Intercontinental Champion, having stolen the title from Mero with the help of the now departed (to WCW) Mr. Perfect. The Stalker is Barry Windham who used to be a military themed guy but is now just Barry Windham with a big mustache. Roberts is Mark Henry’s replacement as Lawler and Roberts are feuding over Jake’s alcoholism.

Oh and it’s Rocky’s debut after weeks of videos talking about how amazing he is. The mind blowing part: they undersold what he would become. The commentary gets even more entertaining as Sunny goes nuts ripping on Sable, claiming to be all natural even down to her hair.

We hit the stall button to start with no contact for the first two minutes. After several tags, Goldust and Mero finally lock up as the announcers discuss Mr. Perfect without saying he’s gone. Marc’s armbars don’t go anywhere so it’s off to the Stalker as JR rips on Barry’s attire. Helmsley comes in and immediately runs from Mero, meaning we get Crush vs. Rocky for his in ring debut. Thankfully that lasts all of ten seconds before it’s off to Lawler for some great selling. Vince actually mentions the name Dwayne Johnson as Sunny suggests being able to take Rocky all the way to the top.

The heels start taking turns on Rocky until he backdrops Helmsley for a breather. Jake gets the hot tag to clean house despite looking a good bit out of shape and very pale. Lawler comes in and slowly hammers away while making alcohol jokes. The DDT scores out of nowhere and it’s 4-3 in a hurry. The mustache with the Windham attached suplexes Goldust for two but a shot from the apron sets up the Curtain Call to tie us up.

Both captains come in as the crowd stays mostly silent. Again though, is there any real reason to care? Crush isn’t interesting, Roberts looks awful and no one knows who Rocky is yet. Helmsley grabs an abdominal stretch and Goldust pulls on the arm, sending heel JR into his second frenzy in an hour.

The referee finally catches Helmsley cheating to break the hold and it’s a Merosault (moonsault pres) to get rid of Hunter. Crush comes in and gets dropkicked to the floor, only to avoid Mero’s slingshot dive. As we’re watching the replays, the announcers completely miss Crush giving Mero the heart punch (exactly what it sounds like) for the elimination. Jake gets the same thing and is eliminated ten seconds later.

So we’re down to Rocky, meaning we get a closeup of his ridiculous looking hair. To his credit, even Rock has said he looked ridiculous at this point. Rocky slugs both guys down and does that stupid arm flailing thing of his. A crossbody puts both guys down and Crush heart punches Goldust by mistake. Rocky hits a second crossbody to get rid of Crush and a shoulder breaker ends Goldust for the win. The pin gets a nice pop, though it might just be because the match is finally over.

Rating: D. They accomplished the goal of giving Rocky a good rub to start (hence why you have goons like Crush around to take a fall like this) but this was WAY too long. You could probably cut out five to ten minutes here and do just about the same thing. Windham was worthless (as he was for most of the time after 1990 or so) and there were way too many stretches of boring non-action dragging it down.

Now it’s time for the real main event as we recap Bret Hart vs. Steve Austin. I know Shawn vs. Sid is going on last but make no mistake about it: this was the most important and anticipated match of the night. Bret had been gone since losing the WWF World Title to Shawn at Wrestlemania XII and Austin has turned into a disrespectful rebel who doesn’t care about legacies or what anyone before him has done. You can see the fire in Austin’s eyes and Bret is the only one that can stop him. Or slow him down at least because there may be no stopping Austin anymore.

Austin says he’s ready and isn’t worried.

Bret says this is about respect, which he’ll receive from Austin no matter what.

Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart

The winner gets the title shot next month. Even Vince has to acknowledge the face pop Austin receives here in New York. Bret gets a great face reaction of his own but Austin really isn’t impressed with the pyro. JR thinks this might come down to a submission, which might be some great foreshadowing for Wrestlemania. He goes even further by saying Bret isn’t a clown or a trashman because he’s a wrestler. Uh, Doink and Droese were wrestlers to Jim. We’re still not ready to go as Vince possibly spoils the main event by saying the winner of this gets Sid.

Austin flips him off to start and we’re ready to go. Feeling out process to start as JR goes back to that submission idea. Vince: “How ironic would it be if Steve Austin put the Sharpshooter on Bret Hart and made him submit?” They trade wristlocks to start and you can see some extra fire in Bret for this match.

Bret takes him down and stays on the arm with a hammerlock until a hard elbow to the jaw puts him down. Austin keeps slugging away until Bret pulls him into another armbar. Bret: “ASK HIM!” Did Jericho get that from Bret? Steve comes right back with a hot shot and starts choking on the bottom rope.

We hit the chinlock and JR goes back to that submission idea again. That’s three times now and it’s really not adding anything new. Back up and it’s time for the slugout with Austin easily taking over as you would expect. Bret comes back with his usual offense but gets shoved chest first into the buckle, again as is his custom. Austin’s superplex is broken up though and Bret goes all the way to the top for the elbow.

They head outside with Austin driving the back into the post as the brawling continues to favor Austin while Bret wins the wrestling. Makes sense. Of course as soon as I say that, Bret throws him through (yes through) the barricade and Austin is suddenly reeling. Just because it’s required, they fight over the announcers’ table with Austin taking over (JR: “It seems that it always happens to the Spanish guys!”) and dropping an elbow onto Bret. The table actually doesn’t break though in a very rare sight.

Back in and we hit the abdominal stretch as Austin continues to know how to focus on a body part. The referee catches Austin holding the ropes (which doesn’t add leverage but helps block a hiptoss counter) so it’s time for a slugout, capped off by Bret hitting a Stun Gun for two. Austin is right back up with a top rope superplex but Bret does the lifting the legs spot (looked horrible here as they were both down for several seconds before going for it) for two.

The Stunner hits out of nowhere for two and JR makes a REALLY good save by saying Bret only kicked out because Austin rolled him away from the ropes. That protects the move, which is completely lost on today’s product. Austin grabs a Texas Cloverleaf, followed by a Bow and Arrow of all things. Unfortunately Austin makes the mistake of trying to mat wrestle with Bret and has to grab the ropes to avoid a Sharpshooter. Back up and Austin grabs the Million Dollar Dream but Bret walks the turnbuckle and flips back onto Austin for the surprise pin.

Rating: A+. Like this would get anything else. I know most people (including myself) say that the I Quit match made Austin a star but he’s not getting to that match without this one. Austin was always a great talent but this was the moment where you knew he was ready for the main event stage. Notice something important about the ending: Bret caught Austin for the pin rather than really decisively beating him. It shows that as great as Austin is, Bret was just that much better and used his experience to win.

Make no mistake about it though: this is a masterpiece and one of the best matches of all time. Unfortunately there was a rematch that is somehow even better and this is a bit forgotten as a result. I’ve heard people say they like this one better and I really can’t argue against that. It’s a must see match and an incredible lesson in giving someone the rub of their career.

JR: “I don’t think anyone, including Shawn Michaels or Sid, could have beaten Bret Hart in this ring on this night.” Vince: “I totally disagree with that.” No followup or anything and the tone was very heelish.

Sid says he’ll win.

Faarooq/Vader/Razor Ramon/Diesel vs. Flash Funk/Savio Vega/Yokozuna/???

Here’s another match with a bunch of notes. Faarooq debuts his traditional Nation look here, thankfully ditching the ridiculous blue gladiator gear. Flash Funk is also making his debut after years as the far better 2 Cold Scorpio. That would be fake Razor and Diesel (duh) with the former just looking horrible. Fake Diesel at least looks like the real thing if you look at him from the right angle. Again, the original idea here wasn’t bad: it’s the gimmicks that got them over instead of the people. Unfortunately that falls apart because Fake Razor looked horrible.

Jim Cornette (Vader’s manager) sits in on commentary and JR says he’s the same size as Yokozuna. Cornette sounds like he wants to cry when he sees Funk for the first time. JR: “I’ve never seen the yellow and red look so good here in the Garden.” The mystery partner is Jimmy Snuka, which gets a mild reaction from the MSG fans and a groan from the audience at home who already saw a legend return with Roberts earlier.

Vader slugs Funk down to start but is quickly sent outside for a moonsault to the floor. You can hear the ECW chants before they even start. Back in and Vader gets tired of this flying nonsense and powerbomb Funk in half. Yokozuna comes in for the embarrassing fat man offense as JR rips on the refereeing again. It’s off to Vega vs. Ramon as the crowd isn’t sure what to care about here.

JR and Cornette argue about whether JR could manage a Wendy’s. JR: “I could if you were in town.” Razor screws up the fall away slam and thankfully it’s off to Funk vs. Diesel so we can get something watchable. Vega comes back in and gets pummeled in the corner as this is already dragging horribly. Snuka get the tag to a pretty anemic pop and quickly runs into Diesel’s knee. In a big surprise, Snuka actually slams Vader. Not bad for a guy who hasn’t been around in forever.

Jimmy almost runs over for the tag back to Vega, who hits maybe 10% of a spinwheel kick on Diesel. Faarooq rams him into the post and the Jackknife ends Vega to hopefully start wrapping this up. The Superfly Splash ends Ramon less than a minute later and then the remaining six come in for the big brawl, resulting in a massive DQ and no winner.

Rating: F-. If there’s a worse Survivor Series match not involving four clowns, my therapy must be working because I’ve completely blocked it from my mind. This was HORRIBLE with eight people that the crowd wasn’t interested in seeing and a nothing ending that only made things worse. Absolutely terrible here as they couldn’t even have Vader survive to give him a bit of a rub?

We recap the main event which is basically Shawn fighting another monster but this time it’s someone he used to trust. Yeah this is hardly anything interesting and feels like a major letdown after Austin vs. Hart. Also, given how badly the ratings were doing around this time, there’s almost no way Shawn is keeping the title here.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Sid

Shawn gets a John Cena style pop as a sign of the times. Sid is challenging of course and pounds Shawn down early on with JR getting right to the point: Sid isn’t technically sound but he can hit you really hard, which is all he needs to do. Shawn speeds things up with some left jabs and a headlock takeover.

The threat of a powerbomb sends Shawn bailing to the outside and we have a breather. Back in and Shawn gets smart by going after the knee, including a Figure Four (actually done on the proper leg). The hold is turned over and Sid sends him shoulder first into the post to take over. Shawn goes right back to the knee and the fans boo him out of the Garden. Thankfully they catch on to the idea and Sid blasts Shawn to the floor with a clothesline.

Back in and Sid gets in a few kicks to the face, followed by a big backbreaker for two. We hit a cobra clutch of all things (Sid would use that occasionally and it always looked weird for someone his size) before a chokeslam drops the champ. Shawn hits his flying forearm and is loudly booed, though the nipup draws a high pitched pop.

Sid grabs a camera and hits Shawn’s manager Jose Lothario in the chest, followed by Sweet Chin Music to the giant. With Jose grabbing his chest, Shawn goes to check on him instead of retaining the title. Sid tries to throw Shawn back in and the referee gets bumped, allowing Sid to hit him with the camera. The powerbomb gives Sid the title (somehow the first title he ever won) to a BIG face pop.

Rating: B+. I don’t like the ending with the camera thing but it’s still a really well put together match. This was pretty much Ric Flair vs. Sid and since Shawn knows how to wrestle a Flair match as well as anyone ever (including Flair), there was almost no way this wasn’t going to work. They let Shawn walk Sid through the match and that was all they ever needed to do.

Shawn checks on Jose as Sid poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade as the Survivor Series matches were horrible but everything else ranges from very good to masterpiece. That’s more than enough to say this is a great show and worth checking out. If nothing else there are so many debuts and repackages here that it’s worth checking out for pure history. The MSG crowd helps provide so much energy and the show is just a lot of fun (save for the one horrible match, which only lasts about ten minutes). See this one at least once but watch Bret vs. Austin as many times as you can.

Ratings Comparison

Team Jesse James vs. Team Billy Gunn

Original: N/A

2012 Redo: N/A

2016 Redo: C-

Team Furnas and Lafon vs. Team Owen Hart/British Bulldog

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Mankind

Original: C+

2012 Redo: B

2016 Redo: B

Team Jerry Lawler vs. Team Jake Roberts

Original: D

2012 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: D

Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

2012 Redo: A+

2016 Redo: A+

Team Vader vs. Team Yokozuna

Original: D-

2012 Redo: F

2016 Redo: F-

Shawn Michaels vs. Sycho Sid

Original: C-

2012 Redo: B

2016 Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2012 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B

This was mostly the same as four years ago, save for me liking Rocky’s debut a lot more back then. That smile must have made me go weak in the knees.

Here’s the original review is you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/15/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1996-bret-vs-austin-the-prequel-and-rock-debuts/

And the 2012 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/04/survivor-series-count-up-1996-thats-blue-chip-right-there/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Survivor Series 1995
Date: November 19, 1995
Location: USAir Arena, Landover, Maryland
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect, Jim Ross

It’s time for the annual redo and I’m curious to see what we’re going to see here. We have some big stuff on the show, including Diesel defending the WWF Title against Bret Hart in a match whose result should be pretty clear after how badly Diesel’s last big title defense went. Let’s get to it.

Mr. Perfect gets a big intro to do commentary. That’s quite the different way to start things off, though it’s how Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura came out to open the first Survivor Series so points for likely unintentional tradition.

The opening video looks at Diesel vs. Bret Hart, which is all that matters on this show.

Underdogs vs. BodyDonnas

Underdogs: Barry Horowitz, Bob Holly, Hakushi, Marty Jannetty

BodyDonnas: 1-2-3 Kid, Skip, Tom Prichard, Rad Radford

And they wonder why things were falling apart at the moment. Sunny handles the BodyDonnas’ intros, though Radford is only a BodyDonna in training and Prichard isn’t Zip yet. The Kid is kind of on loan from Ted DiBiase, who paid off Jean Pierre LaFitte for the spot, and is here as well. Cue Razor Ramon to go after the Kid, who recently turned on him so things aren’t going so well for them. Marty and Prichard start things off with Marty being taken into and having to fight out of the corner in a hurry.

Tom accidentally knees Kid off the apron and Sunny needs to start the rally clap. Holly comes in with a hurricanrana on Radford (Perfect: “Now that was a good looking wrestling move.”) and it’s an armdrag into an armbar. It’s off to Hakushi (for a very positive reaction) but Radford plants him with a spinebuster. Kid comes in to a far more negative reaction and hits the quick legdrop before handing it off to Skip. The belly to back superplex is countered into a crossbody though and it’s off to Holly vs. Prichard. Granted the fans want Barry, but they seem happy to see Prichard missing a moonsault.

That’s enough for Holly to go up with the high crossbody to get rid of Prichard at 5:40. Skip is right back in with a rollup to pin Holly at 5:47 though and we’re tied up again. Hakushi comes back in and kicks away at Skip but the Vader Bomb hits knees. Skip’s super hurricanrana connects but he falls down as well, meaning it’s Kid coming in to kick away. You don’t do that with Hakushi though, as he fires off the strikes and hits a running headbutt for two (JR: “He almost knocked the price tag off the Kid!” Good line.).

The springboard splash misses though and we go split screen to watch an annoyed Ramon and company. It’s going to be made even worse when the Kid kicks Hakushi in the back of the head so Radford can get the pin (with tights) at 8:32. Barry comes in and gets beaten down because he’s Barry Horowitz and that’s all you should have expected. Some right hands stagger Kid but he hands it off to Radford for a gutwrench suplex.

For some reason Skip tells Radford not to pin him, which is only going to go badly. I mean not as badly as being named Skip but how much lower can you go? Radford stops for some pushups and of course Barry grabs a three quarter nelson (as so many people grab) for the pin at 11:50. That gives us the, ahem, epic Barry vs. Skip showdown (yes I do feel stupid writing that) but the Kid gets a blind tag and knees Barry down.

The running legdrop finishes Barry at 12:48 (yes off a legdrop, because Barry Horowitz), leaving us with Skip/Kid vs. Marry. That’s a main event in most flea markets in the country, especially if the person putting the show together wants to get creative. Or if Marty’s partner got lost and started talking to a nice moose. Skip misses a charge into the corner but is fine enough to elbow Jannetty down. They go up top and Marty goes huge with a super powerbomb (dang) for the pin at 15:22.

The Kid is right in there to kick Marty in the head over and over, but a Swanton misses to put them both down. Marty is back up with a dropkick for two….and here’s Sid, also part of DiBiase’s Corporation. The fans chant for Razor as the Rocker Dropper gives Marty two. That’s enough for DiBiase to get on the apron and offer a distraction though, meaning Sid can snap Marty’s throat across the top to give Kid the pin at 19:08.

Rating: D+. If this is their big opener, they’re in a lot more trouble than I thought. This was nothing to see whatsoever, with the wrestling being fine at best and the story being rather pathetic. We’re supposed to get excited about a team whose most successful member is Marty Jannetty with Barry Horowitz as captain? To start a pay per view? I know 1995 was bad but come on now. Not a good start here and I’m almost scared to see the rest.

Post match Sid and Kid celebrate in a somewhat funny bit.

Razor Ramon breaks a lot of stuff over Kid and company winning.

Camp Cornette and Dean Douglas aren’t happy with Razor being annoyed before tonight’s Wild Card match (a cool concept where the teams were fairly random, so of course they never did it again). Owen says Razor needs to get his priorities straight and Dean says they’re going to be fighting without a team member.

Team Aja Kong vs. Team Alundra Blayze

Aja Kong, Bertha Faye, Lioness Asuka, Tomoko Watanabe

Alundra Blayze, Chaparita Asari, Kyoko Inoue, Sakie Hasagawa

Yeah I think this might be better, as the women are making a short term visit from Japan to try and make the women’s division mean something. I mean it didn’t work, but it was worth a try. Kind of like Vince calling a match like this, but thankfully JR is in there to help carry things. Harvey Wippleman is here with Kong’s team and Blayze is Women’s Champion.

Asuka goes straight to a giant swing on Asari to start but it’s quickly off to Blayze, whose who into the ropes….doesn’t quite work as Asuka falls down. Odd visual but a slam works a bit better, seeing up the Sky Twister Press from Asari. The German suplex gets rid of Asuka at 1:43 so they’re starting fast.

Watanabe comes in to stomp away but Blayze sends her outside for the big dive from the top. Back in and Hasagawa rolls some butterfly suplexes but Watanabe is back with a top rope seated senton. Kong comes in and slugs Watanabe down but she snaps off a German suplex for a breather. A quick Saito suplex gets rid of Hasagawa at 3:59. Asari comes in and gets slammed, setting up a middle rope splash for the pin at 4:25.

That sets up the Blayze vs. Kong showdown but it’s off to Inoue after about five seconds of slug out. Kong quickly counters a sunset flip by sitting on Inoue’s chest for the pin at 5:04 and Blayze is on her own. Faye, one of the more disgusting ideas that WWE ever had (see, she’s fat and stupid but she’s strong so it works), comes in to stomp away but Blayze piledrives Watanabe (originally a powerbomb but Blayze couldn’t get her up) for the pin at 6:31.

Bertha comes in again to kick at Blayze’s leg but some heel miscommunication lets Blayze hit a German suplex to pin Faye at 7:12. Faye doesn’t seem to mind as she leaves Kong to headbutt Blayze. A superplex gives Kong two and some hip thrusts in the corner have Blayze in more trouble. She’s right back up to kick Kong down and a standing moonsault gets two. Blayze catches her on top but gets shoved down, setting up the spinning backfist for the pin at 10:03. Now play that Orient Express music!

Rating: C+. The action was WAY better but there’s only so much you can do with seven falls in ten minutes. The women’s division basically didn’t exist outside of Blayze, Faye and whomever else they brought in from Japan at this point, which is probably why the division was dead in a few months. This was a very fun change of pace, but there’s only so much you can do with this many time restraints.

The Bill Clinton impersonator is here and I’m still not sure why…until he thinks Bam Bam Bigelow is from the Flintstones. Yeah this is Vince show.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Goldust

Goldust has only been around for about a month and promises a great performance that will make you remember his name. After a quick stall to start, Goldust hammers away a bit and then bails to the floor to mess with Bigelow’s bald head. Back in and Bigelow hammers away to send Goldust outside again.

The fight is on with Goldust hitting the post but he’s fine enough to take it back inside and clothesline Bigelow to the floor. The front facelock goes on for a bit before Goldust throws him outside (again). Back in and Bigelow gets in a belly to back suplex but Goldust slaps on a reverse chinlock. That’s broken up with an electric chair but Goldust is right back up with the bulldog for the pin at 8:32.

Rating: D. It would take Goldust some time to really get the hang of things and we weren’t to that point yet. Goldust was more of a movie guy here instead of the weird guy he would become, which was what worked when he meshed it together with the movie stuff. The problem is his wrestling consisted of throwing Bigelow to the floor and then hitting a bulldog, which isn’t quite thrilling. This was it for Bigelow as well and he was eventually off to ECW.

Bob Backlund visits the Clinton impersonator and wants to know why he’s here.

We recap the Royals (Mabel) vs. the Dark Side (Undertaker). Mabel and Yokozuna crushed Undertaker’s face and now it’s time for revenge.

Royals vs. Dark Side

Royals: King Mabel, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jerry Lawler, Isaac Yankem

Dark Side: Undertaker, Savio Vega, Henry Godwinn, Fatu

So it’s the Royals vs. the Bone Street Krew. This is Undertaker’s return after a month away due to the crushed face and he has a big skull mask on as a result. Fatu and Helmsley start things off with Fatu hitting a backdrop into a clothesline. A very early Pedigree attempt is cut off with a stare from Undertaker so it’s off to Godwinn to scare Lawler away. Yankem comes in to stomp Godwinn down but Henry is right back up with a clothesline. The jumping elbow gets two but Yankem hits a belly to back suplex.

Helmsley comes in for some uppercuts as we hear about how is still undefeated (dang that makes me feel so old). Godwinn gets in a rather delayed gorilla press and throws Helmsley into the corner for the tag off to Lawler. Vega comes in as well and Lawler starts bouncing off of him like a pinball. Lawler manages a kick to the face and celebrates so Vega knocks him down again. It’s off to Fatu to work on Lawler’s arm but a cheap shot from the apron cuts him off. Yankem gets in the jumping elbow but Mabel misses the charge in the corner, allowing Vega to hammer away.

A big Boss Man Slam cuts that off and Vega gets caught in the corner. Yankem comes back in and hits a dropkick (!), followed by a knee from Helmsley (, at best) for two. Vega manages a Rock Bottom to Helmsley but Lawler, fearing a bad case of death, cuts off the hot tag to Undertaker. The piledriver plants Vega….but he pops up and brings in Undertaker to start the destruction.

Lawler’s partners all run away and it’s the Tombstone for the first elimination at 12:20. Yankem tries to deck Undertaker but gets caught with the jumping clothesline, setting up the Tombstone for the pin at 12:43 (and they were never seen together again). Now it’s Helmsley coming in and being scared off by a single glare.

Helmsley tries to leave but gets sent back to the apron, where Undertaker chokeslams him back inside (good one too) for the pin at 13:36. That leaves Mabel on his own and he hits the belly to belly suplex. The legdrop, which crushed Undertaker’s face, connects….and Undertaker sits up. That’s enough for Mabel, who runs off for the countout at 14:25.

Rating: B-. It’s rare to have the first twelve minutes of a match be absolutely nothing but the last two and a half minutes completely save the match. Undertaker was a wrecking ball here and there was no one touching him. I’ve been watching wrestling for over thirty years and a ticked off Undertaker is the scariest thing that I have ever seen. I loved the Undertaker stuff here and I was getting excited watching it all over again. It’s a great ending and Undertaker can destroy Mabel once and for all before finally finding a great opponent. Like Mankind for instance.

Post match Undertaker chokeslams Mo to blow off some steam.

Bret Hart isn’t worried about British Bulldog next month because he’s ready to face Diesel and knows what’s coming. He feels like Wayne Gretzky, who has to find out if he still has this every year. Tonight, Diesel is finding out that he can’t hang with him.

Diesel is ready to face Bret because he doesn’t need to go long with Bret. He doesn’t get paid by the hour and it’s all power tonight.

Jim Cornette, now with the other team, says he’s been here all day and Ted DiBiase just wants to win. Shawn Michaels comes in to say he’s got this and Ahmed Johnson doesn’t say anything, thank goodness.

Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna

Shawn Michaels, Ahmed Johnson, British Bulldog, Sycho Sid

Yokozuna, Owen Hart, Razor Ramon, Dean Douglas

Ted DiBiase is with Sid and company while Jim Cornette is trying to figure out who he is supposed to help here. Shawn gets a great pop and it’s no shock that he was on the way to the main event. Commentary uses this chance to make jokes about the government balancing a budget because of course they do. Owen and Shawn start things up with Shawn sending him to the floor and giving Cornette a spank with the tennis racket. Back in and Owens hits a belly to belly to cut Shawn off and it’s Dean coming in to slug away.

Shawn takes him down anyway and hits the top rope ax handle, only to get punched in the face again. Dean’s Vader Bomb misses though and Shawn hits a moonsault press for two. Johnson comes in and gets triple teamed with Dean grabbing a chinlock. Back up and a powerslam plants Dean for no cover, even Ahmed poses over Dean after putting him down. Shawn comes back in and the threat of the superkick sends Dean bailing to the floor. Razor isn’t having that and punches Dean into the rollup for the pin at 7:28.

Owen charges in but gets drop toeholded so Shawn can tag Bulldog in. A spinwheel kick cuts Bulldog down and it’s quickly off to Shawn vs. Razor, which is treated as a big showdown. Eh fair enough after the two matches they had. Shawn ducks a clothesline and hits an elbow in the face but Razor hits a very quick Razor’s Edge. Johnson makes the save so Razor hits a running knee lift to put Shawn down. For some reason it puts Razor down as well so Shawn brings in Sid to hammer away in the corner.

Yokozuna comes in for a cheap shot but Sid doesn’t mind and stays on Razor’s back. A double clothesline puts both of them down so Sid goes up top, only to get slammed off the top. Razor gets in a few right hands (I’ve always liked those) but Sid hits a quick chokeslam. Shawn comes in to superkick Razor but hits Sid by mistake. He doesn’t seem to mind so Bulldog….legdrops Sid by mistake, allowing Razor to get the pin at 16:17.

Bulldog comes in to beat on Razor as Sid powerbombs Shawn, allowing Razor to get two. The fresh Owen gets the tag and stays on Shawn’s back before Yokozuna hammers Shawn down in the corner (Perfect: “Welcome back to Syracuse Shawn!”). We hit the nerve hold for a bit before Yoko and Owen hit a double headbutt. Owen misses the diving headbutt though and now the hot tag can bring in Ahmed to clean house. The Pearl River Plunge gets rid of Owen at 21:47.

Razor comes in to slug away at Ahmed (a match between those two could have been interesting) but Ahmed doesn’t know how to STAND IN ONE PLACE for the middle rope bulldog, meaning Razor has to settle for a regular bulldog instead. Likely frustrated by Ahmed being kind of awful, Razor punches Bulldog and Shawn but walks into a spinebuster. Cornette offers a distraction though and it’s the Razor’s Edge to Ahmed. Bulldog breaks that up but here are Sid and the Kid as Razor comes back with the fall away slam.

The distraction lets Bulldog hit the running powerslam for the pin, leaving us with Shawn/Bulldog/Johnson vs. Yokozuna. It’s Shawn getting pounded into the corner to start, which certainly pleases Cornette. Yokozuna drops the big leg but the Banzai Drop only hits mat. The falling tag brings in Ahmed for a slam (less of a slam than Lex Luger’s) but Bulldog makes the save. Shawn and Ahmed get rid of him and it’s the superkick into a screaming splash from Ahmed for the pin at 27:24.

Rating: C. I really liked the idea here and it’s something that could have been done again for years, but for some reason it was only a one off. That being said, the match certainly had some problems, including Johnson looking like he had no idea what he was doing half the time. The match also just kind of came and went without much of a flow. Cool concept, but only a decent execution.

Clinton hits on Sunny and easy jokes are made.

We recap Bret Hart vs. Diesel for the WWF Title. They have had two great matches before as Bret knows how to take the giant down but Diesel is good at the power stuff so it is time for the big showdown. Bret says one of their matches went to a no contest so it’s his title, which Diesel doesn’t see to agree with.

Commentary plays up the technical vs. power here and it makes a lot of sense.

WWF Title: Bret Hart vs. Diesel

Bret is challenging and anything goes. They both unhook turnbuckle pads to start and it’s Diesel hammering away in the corner. That’s enough to send Bret outside so Diesel drops him face first onto the barricade. Bret gets choked against said barricade but he kicks at the leg back inside. Diesel cuts that off with a right hand to the head and then whips him hard into the steps. A chair to the back drops Bret again as it’s one sided in the first few minutes.

The Jackknife is blocked and Bret starts biting to change things up. A choke on Diesel’s back has some more success and now it’s time to kick at the leg. There’s an elbow to the knee and Bret cranks on it for a bonus. Some cannonballs down onto the leg make it even worse and we hit the Figure Four. Diesel grabs a rope and Vince says it has to be broken, but Perfect accurately points out that it doesn’t because there’s no DQ threat to make Bret do anything.

Bret lets it go anyway but it’s way too early for the Sharpshooter. Diesel kicks him away and into the buckle so it’s a bunch of forearms to put Bret down. Unfortunately it puts him down in the corner, where he slides to the floor so Diesel can have his leg wrapped around the post. Bret gets creative by whipping out a cable and tying Diesel’s leg to the post, earning himself a boot to the face. It doesn’t seem to matter much though as Bret gets in a middle rope shot to the face.

The chair is brought in and is promptly kicked into Bret’s face but Diesel is still tied to the post. Bret unloads on him with the chair, including some shots to the knee. Diesel slams him off the top though and unties himself, setting up a big whip into the corner. Vince: “Bret should give up!” Well then tell someone to ring the bell Vince. Diesel can’t hit the running crotch attack so he jumps down onto his back instead.

Snake Eyes drops Bret again but he’s back with right hands to the face. Bret’s middle rope bulldog gets two and Diesel heads to the floor, where he misses the slingshot dive. Diesel knocks him hard off the apron and through the announcers’ table (I believe debuting the spot), leaving Bret mostly dead. Back in and Bret collapses when Diesel tries the Jackknife…and then small packages him for the pin and the title at 24:02. Diesel: “MOTHERF*****!”

Post match Diesel snaps and powerbombs Bret before hitting a referee.

Rating: B+. These two had some great chemistry together and that was on display again here. Bret could brawl when he needed to and he mixed that in with taking apart the knee to have a great match. It also helps when you have him in there to walk Diesel through everything, which is what makes their matches work so well. Diesel could be brought up to another level and there was no one who could do that better than Bret. It was WAY past time to change the title though and thank goodness they did it here.

We get the highlight package….and then go back to commentary for a recap of the heel turn and the sign off. That’s different.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a really weird show as I would have thought only the main event bailed everything out but the rest of the show is mostly good, with only the opener and Goldust vs. Bigelow being pretty bad. The show just doesn’t feel that important and it comes off more as a show that was good in spite of itself, which is rarely a good thing. The main event is good and Undertaker cleaning house is great, but nothing else stands out here in the slightest.

Ratings Comparison

BodyDonnas vs. Underdogs

Original: A-

2012 Redo: B

2020 Redo: D+

Team Bertha Faye vs. Team Alundra Blayze

Original: D

2012 Redo: Redo: C+

2020 Redo: C+

Goldust vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: C

2012 Redo: F

2020 Redo: D

Dark Side vs. Royals

Original: B-

2012 Redo: D+

2020 Redo: B-

Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna

Original: C+

2012 Redo: C+

2020 Redo: C

Bret Hart vs. Diesel

Original: C+

2012 Redo: A

2020 Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2012 Redo: B

2020 Redo: C+

Where in the world was I on that first match???

Here’s the original if you are interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2020/10/30/survivor-series-count-up-1995-original-bret-vs-the-giant/

And the 2012 redo:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/03/survivor-series-count-up-1995-wild-card/

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Survivor Series 1994
Date: November 23, 1994
Location: Freeman Coliseum, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Gorilla Monsoon

We’re rapidly approaching a new era in the WWF but we aren’t quite there yet. The main event tonight is Yokozuna vs. Undertaker in their second casket match of the year with Chuck Norris, yes that Chuck Norris, as the special outside enforcer. Other than that we’ve got Bret defending the title against the now insane Bob Backlund in a submission match. There are also two five on five Survivor Series matches and a four on four version as well. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from earlier today of the team captains giving their teams pep talks.

Gorilla and Vince are dressed as cowboys. Gorilla looks like he could almost pull the look off but Vince looks like a schnook.

Teamsters vs. Bad Guys

Diesel, Shawn Michaels, Owen Hart, Jim Neidhart, Jeff Jarrett

Razor Ramon, 1-2-3 Kid, British Bulldog, Headshrinkers

Diesel and Shawn are tag champions but they’ve having issues. Owen and Neidhart are a semi-regular tag team. This version of the Headshrinkers is Fatu and Sione, more famous as Rikishi and the Barbarian. Razor is IC Champion. I didn’t know that for sure but it’s the mid 90s so I took a shot in the dark. Shawn keeps slipping in front of Diesel to steal the spotlight. That’ll become important later.

It takes awhile to decide who starts before we get Kid vs. Owen. This should be good. The fans chant 1-2-3 which sounds something like RVD. Before there’s any contact it’s off to Neidhart which won’t be as interesting. Neidhart hits a shoulder block to start but gets dropkicked down. Another shoulder gives the Anvil control though and it’s off to Jarrett. Things speed up a bit and Jarrett loses the advantage Neidhart got him.

Off to Sione, who is someone I’ve talked about before but I’ll do it again here. This guy continuously had work for nearly fifteen years, which is impressive when you consider how basic the main character he played was. The guy was always around though other than in the dying days of WCW. Anyway here he gets dropkicked in the back but powers out of the cover with ease.

Off to Owen who wants the Bulldog. Davey comes in to a big ovation and they trade insane counters to wristlocks. Owen gets catapulted into the good guy corner, which is actually the Bad Guy corner, but the Bad Guys are the good guys in the match if that makes sense. Bulldog gets kicked in the face by Hart and it’s off to Neidhart for a double clothesline. Then Bulldog hits a double clothesline on Hart and Anvil, followed by the delayed vertical on Neidhart.

Fatu hits a top rope headbutt for no cover. Instead he tries to take his own boot off because he’s used to wrestling barefoot. Jarrett comes in and is immediately powerslammed before it’s off to Razor. Jeff immediately bails and it’s Razor vs….Jarrett still. Double J takes Razor to the mat and MESSES WITH HIS HAIR! Oh he’s so EVIL! A big right hand by Razor staggers Jeff and a clothesline puts him on the floor. This is a very hot crowd so far.

Back in and Jarrett escapes an atomic drop and punches Razor in the face to get himself in even more trouble. Off to the Kid who Razor gives a fall away slam to send him straight into Jeff in a cool move. Jeff hooks an abdominal stretch with some cheating from Shawn. That eventually gets caught and the Kid hooks a stretch of his own which doesn’t last long. Off to Fatu vs. Owen but all of the Canadian offense results in Samoan dancing.

A blind tag is made to Diesel and it’s a clothesline and a Jackknife to take out Fatu. Kid runs in and hits a dropkick but a top rope sunset flip is easily countered into a chokebomb. Jackknife finishes Kid a second later. Here’s Sione to pound away but he can only stagger the big man. ANOTHER Jackknife makes it 5-2. Diesel put out three guys in 70 seconds. Bulldog comes in and pounds away but a big boot puts Smith on the floor where he brawls with Owen to a countout.

So it’s Ramon vs. all five guys and he starts with Diesel. A discus punch puts Diesel down as does a middle rope bulldog. Diesel gets a clothesline in to take Razor down and Shawn screams for a Jackknife. The future Outsiders slug it out but Diesel drops him on the buckle in a snake eyes. Ramon comes back with a slam and calls for the Edge but Diesel easily backdrops him down. A big boot puts Razor down and there’s the Jackknife.

NOW Shawn wants in but he asks Diesel to hold Razor. Those of you paying attention should know what’s coming, and there it is as Shawn superkicks Diesel by mistake. Apparently this has happened a few times before and Diesel is MAD. Diesel destroys the rest of his team and stalks Shawn up the aisle. Ramon is the only one left in the ring and somehow the countout eliminates EVERYONE on the Teamsters to make Razor the sole survivor.

Rating: C. This was all angle and not much wrestling. This was the big face turn for Diesel which would result in the world title incredibly soon after this. It was a face turn that made sense too as he was tired of Shawn telling him what to do and getting hurt as a result, so he gave up and went after Shawn. Ticked off giants are very fun, so the first few months of Diesel Power were fun stuff. It was the other eight or nine months that stopped being fun.

Shawn leaves in the back and says Diesel is nothing without him. Diesel is on his way to Shawn’s car. Shawn speeds away, which would actually dissolve the team and vacate the tag titles in the process.

Royal Family vs. Clowns R Us

Jerry Lawler, Queasy, Sleazy, Cheesy

Doink, Dink, Wink, Pink

We’ve got midgets. Great. In case you can’t tell, they’re three small Lawlers and three small clowns. Lawler tells the fans to NOT chant Burger King at him, because he’s a master at baiting a crowd you know. The big guys start and guess what the fans are chanting. Here’s the first ten minutes of the match: Lawler and Doink do something, Jerry takes over, the small clowns interfere and Lawler gets mad and loses the advantage.

Lawler tries an enziguri but Doink ducks to send Jerry hiding in his corner. Jerry yells at his partners and the Clowns are all laying on the ropes. Jerry gets Doink down and has the small Lawlers run over him. They make faces at the clowns then run back over Doink and crash in a pile. Keep I mind that these other kings have facial and chest hair. Jerry yells at them again and it’s back to the big guys fighting some more.

The small clowns all come in and cover Jerry with Doink counting. Lawler is all ticked off so they do the EXACT SAME SEQUENCE with Jerry counting Doink’s shoulders. Jerry can’t catch Cheesy when Doink kicks him off so Cheesy gets a two count on Lawler with Dink counting. Doink puts a Burger King crown on Lawler to make him even madder. Dink gets on Doink’s shoulders and (this isn’t a typo) Jerry gets on Sleazy’s shoulders which goes as well as you would expect it to.

The big guys have a test of strength and it turns into a big crisscross between the little guys. Lawler gets a non-existent foreign object to take over but it’s time for a chase scene! Jerry reverses a cross body and rolls up Doink with a handful of tights to eliminate the big guy. Lawler isn’t allowed to be in the ring with one of the smaller guys so the match is in essence over already.

It’s Queasy vs. Dink to start the second half of the match and Dink gets his arm bitten. Queasy gets his tights bitten as does Lawler. Now it’s Cheesy vs. Wink with Wink pulling on the beard. Lawler blocks a monkey flip and Cheesy pins Wink off a rollup. A minute later, Lawler drops Cheesy on Pink from six feet in the air for the pin and it’s Dink vs. all four of them. Pink hides under the ring instead of leaving as Dink beats up all three little guys. A top rope cross body looks to pin Cheesy but Lawler makes the save. Sleazy gets the easy pin to win it.

Rating: S. As in stupider, which I now am having watched this. Last year’s show at least had full sized people in there having these matches and it only ran ten minutes. This ran SIXTEEN MINUTES and wasted Jerry freaking Lawler on it. I’ll take ANYTHING after this and like it more than this.

Jerry says he won the match and not the other ones. They celebrate anyway and Lawler keeps yelling, so they turn on him and the clowns join in for a six on one beatdown. The big payoff is Doink hitting Lawler with a pie. This ran nearly TWENTY MINUTES out of a two hour and forty minute show.

We get clips of Alundra Blayze vs. Bull Nakano in Tokyo with Nakano winning the Women’s Title in front of 45,000 people. I’ve never seen it but I’ve heard that match was awesome. Nakano comes in and speaks some Japanese. Todd (Petingill, this generation’s Josh Matthews/Matt Striker) does the stupid thing where he speaks loudly because all foreigners are deaf apparently.

WWF World Title: Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart

Bret is defending and this is a submission match. This is a special kind of submission match though as both guys have seconds and you have to throw in the towel to end the match. Bret has British Bulldog and Backlund has Owen Hart. Backlund was making a comeback in his 40s and was a plucky face before going completely insane and claiming that he was still champion from when his reign ended in 1983 because his manager threw in the towel and he never gave up. Bret and Owen’s parents are in the crowd. Remember that.

Backlund charges at Bret but gets hipblocked down a few times. Bret headbutts him to the floor and elbowed upon return. Hart hits something like an elevated bulldog (think Orton’s hanging DDT) to take over on the mat. Off to a chinlock which evolves into a headlock. Gorilla talks about how Bulldog beat Bret for the IC Title in 92 to try to draw in some tension. Backlund tries to take him to the mat but Bret puts the headlock back on. Bob tries to get the chickenwing on but Bret suplexes him down.

Sharpshooter doesn’t work so Bret goes with a front facelock instead. Off to an abdominal stretch by the Hitman but Bob escapes and goes after the left arm. The chickenwing is escaped again (Backlund’s finisher is a Cross Face Chicken Wing) so Bob bends the arm around the ropes. Off to an armbar on the mat but Bret nips up. Backlund drills Bret to the floor but Hart gets the advantage out there.

Back in and Backlund puts the arm on as the fans all chant LET’S GO BRET. The armbar stays on for a good while (as in like five minutes) before Bret escapes with an atomic drop. He can’t get the Sharpshooter but he settles for the Figure Four. This hold stays on for awhile also and Bob gives up but Owen has to throw in the towel. Backlund tells Owen to throw it in but Owen won’t do it.

Backlund finally turns it over and Owen tells Bulldog to throw it in. Bret reverses it back but Backlund gets to a rope. Bret stays on the leg but can’t get the Sharpshooter. Backlund grabs a piledriver out of nowhere and momentum shifts again. Bob goes for the Chicken Wing but Bret gets to the ropes. We’re about twenty minutes into this and it feels like about half of that. The fans are WAY behind Bret here still too which is a good sign.

Back to the arm but Backlund misses a charge and goes shoulder first into the post. Bret blocks another piledriver attempt but hooks a sleeper, which is broken pretty fast because it’s not really a submission move. They hit head to head and both guys go down. For a guy who was about 45 at this point, Backlund has looked great. Now Bret piledrives Bob and hits a bulldog to take over.

The Five Moves Of Doom culminate with the Sharpshooter but Owen runs in to deck his brother and break up the hold. Now we get to the turning point of the match as Davey charges at Owen but misses and rams his own head into the steps. He’s out cold and there’s no one to throw in Bret’s towel. Owen panics and the distraction lets Backlund put on the full Chicken Wing even though Bret had his hand on the rope at the beginning of the hold and a rope break was used earlier in the match but I digress.

Backlund has the hold on in the middle of the ring as Owen begins to get concerned about Bret. He says he’s sorry and Backlund takes Bret down to the mat with the hold. Smith still hasn’t moved and Bret is trying to fight up. Bret gets to his feet but can’t get the rope as Backlund pulls him down and puts on the bodyscissors along with the hold. Owen starts crying which Vince declares the TRUE Owen.

Vince says you can lose if you say you quit, which goes against what we saw earlier with Backlund but it’s the WWF so you can’t count on continuity. We go split screen to look at Bret’s parents as Bret has been in this hold for over four minutes. Owen goes over to plead to his mom (not Stu because Stu is smarter than this) as Bret is in agony. Bret taps but that doesn’t mean anything yet. The hold has now been on for six straight minutes and the fans are still behind Bret. The maniacal look on Bob’s face is great.

Owen begs his mom for help again and opens the barricade to bring his parents to ringside. Stu still doesn’t seem to buy anything Owen is saying. Owen picks up Bret’s towel and says for Helen to throw it in but Stu says no way. Owen gets the fans to cheer for Helen to throw in the towel and after nine and a half minutes in the hold, Helen takes the towel from Stu and throws it in, giving Backlund the title and STUNNING the fans. Owen throws his arms in the air and celebrates, sprinting to the back in triumph, because it was a SWERVE.

Rating: A. This match definitely isn’t for everyone, but if you’re a fan of old school matches and psychology, you’re going to love this match. The whole thing is a massive story with the execution being done perfectly (or with excellence if you like plays on catchphrases). Bret and Backlund are both master technicians so the in ring stuff is as close to flawless as you’re going to get. The stuff with Owen is great too and the whole match is almost perfect. It runs about thirty five minutes though and if you’re not a fan of mat stuff and building to a big finish, you’re going to hate this.

One other thing: I’d like to point out that Davey Boy Smith has been out cold for almost eleven minutes now, hasn’t moved an inch, and is likely clinically dead yet hasn’t received any attention at all. Owen stepped over him about four times in the whole sequence.

Backlund’s face as he’s awarded the title is amazing as he looks somewhat retarded which pointing at himself. This is one of those moments where you look at the card on paper and say “well of course Bret retains. There’s no way they would make Backlund champion.” And then they DID and it was a legit shock. Backlund looks maniacal and the image of a plain guy in blue trunks being champion is kind of awesome as he’s all dangerous while looking nuts.

Owen celebrates in the back and cuts a great evil promo talking about how he’s the real king now and Bret is a nobody. This was the culmination of an incredible feud that ran for like a year.

Million Dollar Team vs. Guts And Glory

Tatanka, King King Bundy, Bam Bam Bigelow, Heavenly Bodies

Lex Luger, Adam Bomb, Mabel, Smoking Gunns

This is DiBiase’s team (DiBiase had hurt his neck and had to retire) vs. Luger in a continuation of a long feud. DiBiase had said that Luger had sold out and Tatanka, Luger’s friend, believed DiBiase. This led to a match at Summerslam where it turned out that TATANKA had been bought off in a swerve I liked a lot. This is Luger’s chance for revenge again.

Luger and Tatanka start things off, much to Tatanka’s surprise. Tatanka takes over to start and chops away but the ones to the chest don’t work on Luger. Does no one watch the NWA around here? Lex no sells a suplex and pounds away with all his usual stuff. A clothesline puts Tatanka on the floor so here’s Del Ray to be beaten up too. Mabel and Bundy come in but it’s just a staredown as it’s back to the starters. Now it’s officially Mabel vs. Prichard (the Bodies are Tom Prichard and Jimmy Del Ray) with the big man missing an elbow. Prichard pounds away but a middle rope cross body (Mabel weighs 500lbs) kills him dead.

It’s 5-4 now and Del Ray comes in for some dropkicks which have no effect. A Boss Man Slam takes Jimmy down so it’s off to Bundy vs. Mabel. They collide a few times until Mabel runs him over. Off to Bigelow who gets beaten down and Mabel goes up, only to get slammed down in a cool visual. Bigelow goes up for a sunset flip but Mabel sits on his chest for no cover. A Cactus Clothesline sends them both to the floor and Mabel can’t beat the count back in to tie things up.

Off to Billy Gunn vs. Del Ray which goes nowhere so here’s Bomb vs. Bigelow. This takes about 30 seconds with Bomb hitting a slingshot clothesline but getting hit in the head by Bundy. A moonsault takes Bomb out and it’s 4-3. Luger comes in immediately and tries a rollup but it just gets two. Off to Del Ray who hits a fast superkick to take Lex down. After some right hands from Jimmy, a running forearm smash catches him in the head and Luger ties it up.

It’s Tatanka/Bigelow/Bundy vs. Luger/Smoking Gunns. It’s Bart vs. Tatanka before Billy comes in for a double Russian legsweep for two. The Gunns pound away on Tatanka for a little while with Bart and his mullet of death hitting a monkey flip for two. The Sidewinder (side slam from Bart with a legdrop from Billy) gets two and it’s back to Bart, who like an IDIOT, tries a crucifix on a guy whose finisher is a Samoan Drop. Later Bart and it’s 3-2.

Billy vs. Tatanka goes nowhere so it’s back to Luger. Billy comes in and hip tosses Tatanka for two and an elbow drop gets the same. Luger and Gunn take turns on Tatanka’s arm until Billy gets caught in a powerslam. Off to Bundy who hits a splash and elbow to get us down to Luger vs. Bigelow, Bundy and Tatanka. It’s Luger vs. King Kong now but Lex goes after Tatanka because he’s A FREAKING MORON.

Luger gets caught in the evil corner and we play the numbers game for awhile. Luger hits a forearm to Tatanka but only gets two. A sunset flip almost gets a pin on Tatanka but a tag was made on the way down to bring in Bigelow. Bundy drops an elbow for two and Lex is in trouble. Bigelow drops a headbutt for a VERY fast two. DiBiase talks trash as it’s off to Bundy for more fat man offense.

Bundy drops an elbow for two as we’re reenacting the main event of the first Survivor Series, complete with two of the original people in it. Back to Tatanka who gets two off a powerslam and drops a bunch of elbows. In a stupid looking yet still good ending, Luger gets a fast small package for the pin on Tatanka, then lays down on the mat so Bundy can splash him for the final elimination. That looked stupid.

Rating: C. This wasn’t that bad actually and the ending was a nice surprise. There was no reason to have Luger come back here and having him lose was the right move. The feud didn’t really go anywhere after this and was more or less the ending of it. Luger’s collapse after Summerslam 1993 is a sight to see given how hot he was during the summer after his face turn.

A group beatdown on Lex follows the match. The Gunns and Bomb make the save.

Backlund has a press conference and says he’s going to homogenize and synchronize the fans. It’s time for Sports Education and he’s been champion for sixteen years now. I love this character, which is a shame because he would lose the title to Diesel less than a week later in eight seconds.

Here’s Chuck Norris to be guest referee for the main event.

Quick recap before we get to casket match. This is a rematch of a casket match at the Royal Rumble (don’t get me started on that mess) where about ten guys came out to help Yokozuna beat Undertaker. Norris is here to stop interference.

Yokozuna vs. Undertaker

This is a casket match where you have to throw your opponent in the casket and close it to win. Druids bring out the casket of course. Yoko is so fat here it’s unreal. Taker does the throat slit from across the ring and Yoko falls down. A Yoko splash in the corner is no sold but the fat man stops before he gets thrown to the casket. Yoko winds up on top of the casket to further freak him out.

They fight to the floor with Taker in control. Back inside Old School staggers Yoko but he catches Taker in a Samoan Drop. Taker doesn’t sell it but the move did hit. A headbutt puts Taker down but he won’t go in the casket. Back in and Taker misses an elbow but sits up anyway. A Rock Bottom puts Taker down and Yoko drops a leg while he’s sitting up to keep the dead man (as in Undertaker, not the legitimately dead Yokozuna) down.

Taker gets put in the casket but he blocks it from being closed. They both wind up in the box and slug it out but Mr. Fuji pulls Taker’s hair to break things up. Cornette (Yoko’s other manager) gets drilled as well and we head back inside. Yoko sends him back to the floor and rams him into the steps (from inside the ring, which is kind of impressive). Back inside and they slug it out with Taker slamming Yoko’s head into the mat.

Taker channels his inner Kane and hits a top rope clothesline to put Yokozuna down. As he’s rolling the fat man over, here’s King Kong Bundy to glare at Norris. Bigelow comes out as well but nothing comes of it. Nothing comes of it on their end at least as IRS comes in and beats up Undertaker, which would also set up the Undertaker vs. DiBiase’s Corporation feud for 1995. Taker gets put in the casket but by the time Yoko gets there, Taker blocks the lid from closing. Jeff Jarrett comes out to challenge Norris and gets kicked in the chest. Taker hits a DDT and a big boot to send Yokozuna into the casket for the win.

Rating: D. This was really dull stuff and the ending was never in doubt. Once Yokozuna got this fat he was just worthless. This was the last we would see of him until Wrestlemania where he came back EVEN BIGGER. Norris didn’t really add much here but the fans liked him and that’s all that really matters. Thankfully this feud ended here.

Overall Rating: C-. This isn’t a terrible show but there are some bad parts to it. The interesting thing is that in a lot of parts, this is a sequel of last year’s show. Last year we heard rumblings of Shawn being the REAL Intercontinental Champion and he was facing Razor here, Taker vs. Yoko is a direct continuation, and Bret vs. Owen started at the 93 show and it’s almost over here (they would interact at the Rumble and have one big blowoff match after that). Anyway, this isn’t bad but a lot of people would be bored by the title match, which is understandable. Not a great show but it’s watchable, except for the clowns.

Ratings Comparison

Teamsters vs. Bad Guys

Original: C-

Redo: C

Royal Family vs. Clowns R Us

Original: G (as in below an F)

Redo: S

Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart

Original: A

Redo: A

Million Dollar Team vs. Guts and Glory

Original: C-

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Yokozuna

Original: D+

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: C-

That’s probably as close as any of these second looks are going to go.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/13/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-mr-bob-backlund-and-chuck-norris/

Survivor Series 1993
Date: November 24, 1993
Location: Boston Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 15,509
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

This is a show that I remember watching a lot as a kid but I think my tape ran out about halfway through it. Stupid VHS. Anyway, the main event tonight is a battle for AMERICA with a bunch of foreigners (like from that far off nation of Hawaii) against a bunch of Americans. Other than that we have Bret’s team vs. Shawn’s team. No really. We’re mostly back to the team vs. team formula this year. Let’s get to it.

I remember watching this when I was a kid and I always liked the theme of going through the skeleton of a building. It looks cool.

Vince and Bobby talk a little bit about the concept and we’re ready to go.

Team IRS vs. Team Razor Ramon

IRS, Adam Bomb, Diesel, Rick Martel

Razor Ramon, 1-2-3 Kid, Marty Jannetty, Mr. Perfect

IRS and Ramon are feuding over Razor’s IC Title, Martel was the guy Ramon beat for the title, Diesel and Adam Bomb are just there to fill in spots, Jannetty and Kid are a semi-regular tag team and Perfect….isn’t here. Ramon talks about Perfect leaving (his back messed up again and he just kind of left for five months) but he’s got a treat for us. He’s got a surprise partner and it’s……RANDY SAVAGE! Heenan LOSES IT and the crowd does too. This is when Savage wanted to murder Crush, who is in the main event tonight.

Heenan apparently called Perfect no showing this and Vince says Heenan was right for once. Bobby: “FOR ONCE???” Oh yes Bobby is feeling it tonight. Ramon and Martel start things off with Rick working on the arm. They fight for the arm and hit the mat for a bit before popping back up. Razor slaps him in the face and rolls through a cross body for two. Martel gets caught in the fallaway slam (BIG pop for that) for two.

Razor hits a pair of atomic drops and a clothesline for two. Off to Adam Bomb who shoves Ramon into the corner with ease. They collide and Razor is knocked down in something which shouldn’t surprise anyone. They have a test of strength with Bomb controlling again before Ramon fights up and suplexes Bomb down.

Martel tries to save but elbows Bomb by mistake. Harvey Whippleman (Bomb’s manager) gets up on the apron and is knocked down, causing a big fight between IRS’ team. Ramon’s team, somehow thinking coherently given how many drugs must be in them, actually uses common sense and lets them fight. We get things settled down and it’s the Kid vs. Bomb. Kid tries a sunset flip and Bomb (about 6’8 and 300lbs) is like boy please.

Off to Diesel who throws Kid around even harder. Who thought it was a good idea to put the Kid in there against the biggest and strongest opponents? A gutwrench powerbomb from Diesel leaves Kid laying and a big boot does the same. Kid finally hits a spin kick and it’s off to Savage who destroys the entire team, including sending Bomb into Diesel. A slam puts Diesel down and the flying elbow makes it 4-3. Write that down as you may never see Nash do another clean job.

Martel charges in and rams Savage face first into the buckle. Since it’s 1993, Martel’s offense has almost no effect and Savage takes over. Off to IRS who has a bit better luck as he takes Savage into the corner but gets cross bodied for two. Back to Ramon who works on the arm but as he hits the ropes, Martel hits Razor in the back to slow the Bad Guy (Razor’s nickname) down.

Bomb comes back in to power Razor around a bit but it’s quickly back to Martel. Make that IRS who works on Razor’s back. We hit the chinlock and the heels switch a few times without tagging. Off to Macho Man again who knees IRS into the corner. A slam looks to set up the Elbow but here comes Crush. Savage sees him and immediately goes after him but is sent back into the ring and rolled up by IRS for the pin and elimination.

Savage chases Crush into the back and looks for him in the locker rooms as the match is still going on. Savage doesn’t find him so we’ll continue this game later. We come back to the ring to see Adam Bomb choking away on Jannetty and stomping him in the corner. Martel hooks an abdominal stretch for a few seconds but a corner charge hits the post and it’s back to Ramon.

Razor pounds away on IRS and hits a chokeslam followed by the Razor’s Edge for the pin and the 3-2 advantage. Everything breaks down and as Razor loads up the Edge on Martel, IRS hits him in the ribs with his briefcase. Ramon rolls to the floor and gets counted out to tie things up again. So it’s Jannetty/1-2-3 Kid vs. Martel/Bomb. The Kid gets sent to the floor and slammed down by Bomb who hits a slingshot clothesline to take the Kid down back inside.

Off to Martel as the Kid is in a lot of trouble. Martel drops some knees on the back for two as Vince says the Kid has a lot of heart. Heenan: “THEN KICK HIM IN THE HEART!” Martel jumps into a right hand to the ribs and there’s the tag to Jannetty who cleans house. Back to the Kid way too soon for a double back elbow and a sunset flip to eliminate Martel. Kid immediately tags in Jannetty who sunset flips Bomb for the pin ten seconds after Martel was eliminated. REALLY hot ending here.

Rating: B. I really liked this match as it was fast paced and a ton of fun. If you cut about five minutes from this, it’s a classic. Having Jannetty and the Kid be the survivors was a very nice surprise and it gave the fans something to cheer for. Really liked this one and it puts the show off on the right foot.

Shawn is in the back with the IC Title. There are two of them at this point as Shawn was suspended while champion but he kept the belt. That gives us two belts which is a problem. Maybe we should put them above the ring and make the guys climb a ladder to get them while having one of the best matches ever. Anyway tonight it’s Shawn and his Knights (that’ll make sense later) vs. the Hart Family.

We go to a Hart Family interview earlier with Family Feud (game show) host Ray Combs. They all say that Shawn is in trouble for going after Stu recently and it’s going to be a massive Hart Attack. Back to Shawn who says he’s not ready for the Harts and he makes fun of all five of them, including Stu. Shawn is really clicking as the insanely arrogant heel by this point.

Jannetty and Kid celebrate with Ramon. Savage is off chasing Crush.

Ray Combs talks about the Hart Family being at ringside. Pay attention because it’s amazing enough to have them all in the same place without suing or trying to kill each other. Helen is there too. Combs gets in some jokes about Shawn which aren’t really funny but this is filler stuff anyway. Vince of course laughs like there’s no tomorrow. While Combs bombs out there, here’s the idea of this feud.

Bret and Jerry Lawler had been feuding for months and it was building up to this show with Bret’s family coming to help him against the King and his Knights. Then some chick said Lawler raped her and Lawler had to be pulled from this show (the girl later admitted she made it up and Lawler wasn’t in trouble), so Shawn, the guy Bret had feuded with last year, was brought in as a replacement. It was likely the best option they had but it was completely out of place after the months of build they had set up.

Hart Family vs. Shawn Michaels/Knights

Bret Hart, Keith Hart, Bruce Hart, Owen Hart

Shawn Michaels, Blue Knight, Black Knight, Red Knight

The Blue Knight is Greg Valentine, the Red Knight is Barry Horowitz and the Black Knight is Jeff Gaylord (indy guy who never meant anything on a national stage). Stu Hart is here with his sons as if there was somehow any doubt as to who was getting destroyed here. Ray Combs sits in on commentary and while he’s not incredibly funny, he sounds like he’s having a blast out there and is enjoying himself which is all I ask for from a celebrity. Heenan vs. Combs on commentary is a good back and forth jab fest if nothing else.

Shawn and Owen start but Shawn wants Keith, who along with Bruce haven’t wrestled in years. Keith speeds things up and Shawn gets sent into the interfering Red Knight. Shawn tries to throw Keith into the corner but Keith takes out Red and Blue. An armdrag takes Shawn down and it’s off to Keith for an armbar. Shawn’s suplex attempt is countered into a small package and it’s back to the armbar.

Michaels slams Keith down and it’s off to the Red Knight vs. Owen. Owen fires off some shots to the arm and it’s off to the Black Knight. That goes nowhere at all so it’s off to Blue vs. Bret. Bret hits some atomic drops and a clothesline for two. Back to Keith who continues the armbar marathon and it’s Bruce time again. Back to Shawn with a backbreaker and some elbows to the back.

Red comes in and suplexes Bruce down for two. Back to Black (who is not Kane as has been mentioned before) who is the biggest of the Knights and gets rolled up for two. It’s back to Shawn who gets rammed into the corner before the Red Knight pokes Bruce in the head. Bruce hits a clothesline and it’s off to Bret vs. Black. An O’Connor Roll and small package both get two for Bret and he takes over. The backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two and it’s off to Owen.

A spinwheel kick puts Black down and everything breaks down. Shawn and all three Knights get sent into each other in the middle of the ring and a missile dropkick from Owen pins Black. Off to the Red Knight and Owen works over the leg. Back to Bret and they make a wish on Red’s legs. Keith comes in again and the leg work continues. I’ve been watching this show for years and for the life of me I can’t stop confusing Bruce and Keith.

Red tries a knee lift and hurts his own knee in the process. Some fans chant boring and they’re right in doing so. Back to Bruce who pops Red in the face. The Hitman comes in and we get another wishbone split. Red sends Keith into the buckle to escape a figure four attempt but misses a knee drop instead of tagging. Keith puts on a Figure Four but Shawn makes the save and it’s off to Blue.

Those boring chants are getting a little bit louder. Blue works over Keith’s arm and it’s off to Shawn with a top rope double ax to the arm. The shoulder gets sent into the buckle and Shawn cranks on the bad arm. Back to Red whose leg seems fine now. Rey cranks on the arm around the post which results in more double teaming. Heenan has been ripping the Harts apart the entire match, including a nice jab here: “None of them look alike.” Keep in mind this is as Keith is having his arm destroyed.

Blue stays on the arm including a legdrop on it and a hammerlock slam. Off to Shawn who misses a Rocket Launcher. Off to Bret, prompting Shawn to tag out to Red. Red immediately gets caught in a spinebuster and the Sharpshooter to make it 4-2. Blue comes in to clothesline Bret and both he and Keith are now hurt. Bret is thrown back in and suplexed down for two.

Blue drops a very Greg Valentine elbow and Heenan says he knows who the Blue Knight is. Vince: “Who is that?” Bobby: “The guy in the ring that just dropped an elbow on Bret Hart.” I love you Bobby Heenan. Back to Shawn for a chinlock to kill even more time. I’m not sure how much there is of it left as this has been going long already. Blue comes in for another two off another elbow as Bobby lays into Helen Hart.

Bret hits a middle rope clothesline and he makes the tag to Owen. The crowd just does not care here and the lack of any reaction is kind of sad. A middle rope elbow gets two on Blue and Bruce and Shawn come in at the same time. Shawn goes to the floor and goes after Stu, only to get BLASTED IN THE FACE. Bobby: “I’ve always liked Stu.” A missile dropkick puts Blue down but Shawn’s saving elbow hits Blue as well. Shawn is sent to the floor and the Sharpshooter eliminates Blue.

It’s 4-1 and Shawn is drinking water. All four of the Harts hammer on Shawn and it’s Bruce who gets two off an elbow drop. Bruce charges into a boot and Shawn chokes away a bit. The superkick puts Bruce down but that’s still not a finisher and only gets two. Bruce gets in a boot and makes the tag to Bret to a small reaction. Bret hits a slingshot to the buckle for two. Shawn gets in a kick and it’s off to Owen.

Now here’s where it gets interesting: Bret is trying to get it together on the apron and Owen is rammed into Bret, knocking him off the apron and into the barricade. Owen is distracted and pinned. All of the brothers and Stu go to check on Bret and Owen FREAKS, storming to the back and shouting WHAT ABOUT ME! This would start the feud of the year in 1994.

Bruce comes in and drops an elbow on Shawn for two. Bret is still getting up after the crash he took into the barricade. Bruce and Shawn hit head to head twice in a row to really stretch this thing out. Keith comes in with an abdominal stretch (including the toe around the ankle) but Shawn hip tosses out of it with ease. Back to Bret who pounds away and Shawn gets crotched on the top rope. Bret picks the leg but Shawn escapes the Sharpshooter and walks out for the countout.

Rating: D. This was…….long. At the end of the day it ran 30 minutes when it should have been about 15. The only thing that mattered here was Owen and the future angle vs. Bret. Shawn being in there didn’t help much, but it needed to be Jerry Lawler and without him this didn’t mean anything of note. Not a good match and the length hurt it a lot. They were against things they couldn’t really help here and that’s what brought it down a lot.

Owen comes back and gets in Bret’s face during the celebration. Stu tries to calm Owen down but Owen rants about getting no recognition and celebrates in the ring on his own. Helen loses it as well.

Gorilla and JR are going to do commentary on the next match as Heenan and Vince are going to do Radio WWF, which didn’t last long. During the change over, Gorilla threatens to kill Heenan which was his trademark at this point.

We recap the Foreign Fanatics vs. the All Americans. Ludvig Borga hit Tatanka with a chair and pinned him with one finger, breaking his two year undefeated streak. Tatanka got beaten up by Yokozuna. This led to the Steiners and Luger picking a new partner in the Undertaker. This led to an awesome moment with Taker opening his coat and having an American Flag inside of it (with 13 stars for some reason). Luger then beat up Quebecer Pierre for no apparent reason. The Fanatics added the EVIL FOREIGN Hawaiian Crush. This must be the intermission.

Here’s Jim Cornette to introduce his team for a very out there match.

Smokey Mountain Wrestling Tag Titles: Heavenly Bodies vs. Rock N Roll Express

This is part of an agreement the companies had at the time which didn’t quite work that well. The Express (Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson) are the champions and they’re defending against the Bodies (Tom Prichard and Jimmy Del Ray). It’s a brawl to start with the Express being sent to the floor. Gibson is pulled back in but Morton pulls both of the Bodies out to the floor. Ricky follows that up with a suicide dive to take both of them out at the same time.

Things slow down and we start with Gibson vs. Del Ray. Things are going to go very fast in this match and that’s exactly how it starts with Gibson flipping out of the corner and hitting a headscissor takeover before bringing in Morton. Prichard comes in and gets booed louder than all of the Knights in the previous match combined. Morton can’t quite get above Prichard on a leapfrog and he ducks a Del Ray superkick which takes Prichard down instead.

Both Bodies get monkey flipped out of the corner and we get the always dumb looking rowboat spot, which is where all four of the heels’ legs are rotated around by the good guys. Gibson works on Prichard’s leg and the Express take out Del Ray in the corner before Morton works on Prichard’s leg as well. Tom finally gets in a shot and it’s off to Del Ray who is immediately armdragged down.

In a nice move, Gibson blocks the buckle before Morton’s back hits it to prevent the Bodies from getting the advantage. It’s all Express other than the first fifteen seconds or so. The Bodies have a quick huddle on the floor and the fans are bored. It’s Prichard vs. Morton now with the heels taking over for the first time since the beginning. Off to Del Ray who is suplexed down onto Morton for two.

Back to Prichard for some more choking. There wasn’t a tag but that’s why the Bodies are heels. Del Ray hits an Asai Moonsault to the floor and it’s back to Prichard in the ring who hits a powerslam for two. Off to a chinlock as this match is turning into an old school tag match of the NWA style. A Trash Compactor (a kind of spinebuster/guillotine legdrop combo) gets two but Del Ray’s powerbomb is countered into a rana for two.

Ricky hooks a small package for another two and Del Ray hits a moonsault press on Morton for ANOTHER two. This is why it’s called Playing Ricky Morton people. The guy was a master at it. A double DDT puts the Bodies down and Morton rolls over to make the tag to Gibson.

Now we get to the point of the match: Prichard throws Morton over the top, which is a DQ in SMW, but this is in the WWF. Gibson gets confused and decked for his confusion as Morton gets beaten down even more. There’s the double dropkick to Prichard but it only gets two. Del Ray comes off the top with a tennis racket (Cornette signature) shot to Gibson for the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. This was a strange match as from a technical standpoint it was quite good and in SMW it would have been the main event of a big show, but we’re not in SMW. We’re in the WWF here and these people don’t mean anything. There’s a deep history here of a ton of matches with various gimmicks to them, making this a huge feud. The problem is all we’re told is they’ve been feuding for years. It’s the same issue you have with Japanese wrestlers: just being told how great they are doesn’t mean anything to most fans. We need to see these things, not be told about them.

Team Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Four Doinks

Bam Bam Bigelow, Bastion Booger, Headshrinkers

Bushwhackers, Men on a Mission

Ok. I can get through this. Four years ago I stopped watching this midway through but I’m going to get through it this time. The Doinks are all dressed like a clown and their identities were secret until they were unveiled here. Luke comes out on a scooter, Butch has a wagon, the Men on a Mission come out on foot. Mabel needs the exercise so that’s a good idea. Notice that there’s no actual Doink in the match and the fans aren’t going to be pleased here.

A LOUD We Want Doink chant starts up and Bastion and Luke start things off. Booger is a VERY fat guy in a too small singlet in case you’re not familiar with him. Luke bites him on the ample singlet before stomping on Bastion’s foot. Afa bites Butch’s balloon and it’s off to Samu. Then he bites a water balloon and gets rolled up by Luke for the pin. Fatu (Rikishi) comes in and Luke hurts his own head off a headbutt attempt.

Booger comes in and drops a leg on Luke and it’s off to Bigelow with a headbutt to the ribs. Booger comes back in and sits on Luke before stopping for a banana. Another drop by Bastion misses and the Battering Ram puts him down. Mabel drops a leg on Bastion and it’s 4-2. Fatu comes in to offer meat to Luke and takes over, but here’s Mo on a scooter for a ride around the ring. Bigelow comes in and destroys the scooter and Fatu hits the top rope splash….and stops for a banana.

Butch comes in with a bucket of something….scratch that as there’s nothing in it, but Fatu slips on a banana peel as he jumps from it and Butch rolls him up for the pin. Bigelow is all that’s left and he gets to fight Mabel. Bam Bam can’t do anything to the power of fat but Mabel misses a splash. The other Doinks come in and get beaten up also but Butch throws something on Luna. Mabel splashes Bigelow and a dog pile (which is allowed) gets the pin.

Rating: Awe. I am in awe. We had falls from a water balloon, a banana peel and a bucket of something being thrown on Luna. There’s nothing else I can say about that and I’m not going to try.

As Bigelow is leaving, Doink (whose actor has recently changed) pops up on screen to laugh at Bam Bam. The next step in this feud: a midget named Dink of course.

The Doinks, including the real Doink, celebrate in the back. Why the REAL Doink couldn’t be in the arena isn’t answered.

The Foreign Fanatics are in the back and Cornette talks about their battle plan. He talks about how they look at the All Americans as one man. You can take a man out by taking out his heart, his mind and his soul. The Steiners are the heart, but if you take it out, he has no will to fight. The Undertaker is the mind, but if you take it out, the man is confused. Luger is the soul, but if you take it out, you’ve defeated him completely. I’ve always liked that.

Before the match, we get a history lesson about Boston. No seriously, this happens. Thankfully it turns into some promos from the All Americans.

Foreign Fanatics vs. All Americans

Yokozuna, Crush, Ludvig Borga, Jacques

Lex Luger, Undertaker, Steiner Brothers

The Quebecers are the tag champions and have Johnny Raven Polo as their manager. Yoko is world champion. Jacques and Scott start things off and Jacques offers a handshake. Scott says screw you in classic Freakzilla style. Scott hits a quick belly to belly for two and it’s off to Rick. Jacques brings in Yoko and things slow down almost immediately. Rick hits a clothesline and a shoulder to knock Yoko out to the floor but it doesn’t do much good.

Off to Borga who died in the last year or so. Rick gets knocked to the floor but comes back in off the top with a shoulder for no cover. Borga misses an elbow and Rick goes up again, coming off with a cross body. Borga rolls through it and Rick isn’t moving at all, giving Borga an easy pin. Rick finally starts moving and holds his leg, so I’m thinking that’s a legit injury. Rick can’t stand up on the floor.

Scott comes in next and gets to fight Jacques. Rick eventually limps off on his own power which is a good sign at least. Scott hits a great gorilla press but Crush catches a falling Jacques and I guess that’s a tag. Steiner wants nothing to do with a test of strength so Crush pounds on him a bit. A butterfly powerbomb puts Crush down and apparently Savage is back in the building. Crush kicks Scott down and here’s Macho.

Crush throws Scott down to the floor over the top but he won’t go after Savage. Randy gets sent to the back and the dull match continues as Scott may have hurt his knee on that fall. The knee gets targeted now with Crush firing away some kicks and Savage is coming back AGAIN. Scott dropkicks Crush to the floor and Crush goes after Savage for long enough to draw a countout.

Jacques goes after the injured Scott now with a rear chinlock followed by an elbow to the jaw for two. Scott somehow hits a gorilla press on Jacques and there’s the tag to Lex. He slams Jacques down and drops a middle rope elbow for the elimination. It’s now Lex, Taker and Scott vs. Borga and Yoko. Borga comes in to face the still limping Scott. Taker hasn’t been in the match yet.

Borga pounds on the ribs and whips Scott in the corner so he can clothesline Steiner down. Borga goes up top but gets suplexed back down for two. Yoko comes in and pounds away, but Scott gets in some offense. He tries the freaking Frankensteiner which goes about as well as you would expect it to, resulting in a legdrop from Yoko eliminating Scott to get us down to two on two.

Luger comes in as we’re almost 20 minutes in with no Taker at all yet. Borga, a Finn, waves the Japanese flag. Yoko misses a splash and Lex pounds away, only to get clotheslined down with ease. Off to Borga who runs Luger over again and kicks him in the ribs. Back to Yoko who misses a charge, and it’s FINALLY off to Taker.

Taker hits his running DDT and sits up but a Borga distraction lets Yoko suplex Taker down. There’s the situp and another after a clothesline. A legdrop keeps Taker down and there’s the Banzai, but Yoko goes for another, and Taker moves. A clothesline puts Yoko on the floor and they brawl to a double countout. See you at the Rumble boys. Taker was legally in the match for less than two minutes and forty seconds.

So it’s Lex vs. Borga now and as Taker and Yoko brawl on the floor. Ludvig has taken over and drops a leg on Lex. A side slam puts Lex down for two and Borga gets more two’s off various other power moves. He isn’t covering well though so he isn’t ready to pin Luger yet. A suplex puts Borga down and they clothesline each other. With Cornette distracting the referee, Borga hits Lex with Fuji’s salt bucket for two. Lex gets fired up and hits a powerslam and the loaded forearm for the final pin.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work either. Taker was the main draw of the match and he wasn’t even in there for a tenth of the match. Yoko vs. Taker would go on to screw up two PPVs and Lex would never get the title, basically making the second half of 1993 totally pointless. This match didn’t work at all, and a lot of that is due to the heel lineup. Unless there was an injury or something, I don’t get why Pierre was taken out.

Santa comes out to celebrate with Luger just like last year.

Overall Rating: D. Let’s take a look at this card: great opener, WAY too long second match with the wrong main heel, a match from another company, the banana peel/water balloon match, and the main event with an evil foreign Hawaiian (insert your own lame Obama joke here). This show comes off as very long and dull, with most of the matches being completely uninteresting. It was uninteresting back in the day too, as this show got the lowest buyrate in the history of the Survivor Series up to this point. Next year would be another head scratching show.

Ratings Comparison

Team Razor Ramon vs. Team IRS

Original: B

Redo: B

Hart Family vs. Team Shawn Michaels

Original: D+

Redo: D

Rock N Roll Express vs. Heavenly Bodies

Original: B

Redo: B-

Four Doinks vs. Team Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: N/A

Redo: Awe

All-Americans vs. Foreign Fanatics

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Overall Rating:

Original: C+

Redo: D

It was almost the same until the overall rating. I don’t get how it jumps up that high off just a few better grades.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/12/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1993-usa-usa-usa/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Survivor Series 1991
Date: November 27, 1991
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 17,500
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Things are a bit different here but the real change will come next year. The main thing here is that we have a world title match in the first singles match in the history of this show. Undertaker has gone from squashing jobbers to the stars to squashing people out of the company to terrorizing Savage and Liz at their wedding to being #1 contender. Hogan hasn’t done anything since Wrestlemania so a change of opponents will do him a world of good. Oh and Ric Flair is here. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from Superstars with Savage being tied up in the ropes as Jake Roberts made the cobra bite Savage’s arm. Piper immediately ran down from the broadcast booth to try to help. Liz came out screaming as well. This is when Savage was a commentator and retired but looking for reinstatement.

The key thing is he had been scheduled to be on the PPV as a captain against Jake’s team, but because of this, both captains were pulled off the show with three days’ notice, basically baiting and switching the fans. The actual match between the two of them would be a week later on a different PPV called Tuesday in Texas, which was another $20.

Anyway back on Superstars, Savage can’t stand up because of the snake bite but he keeps trying to fight Jake. They finally get Savage on a stretcher and start wheeling him away but he falls off. Now we get to the unintentional comedy part of this. Savage falls off and remember that Vince is on commentary here, so he’s FREAKING over all this stuff. The camera cuts to a crying child in the crowd and Vince loses it, audibly cracking up on air and trying to talk about “complete chaos” while clearly laughing.

We get the announcement from Jack Tunney that Savage and Roberts won’t be allowed to wrestle at Survivor Series. This is translated as “HAHA WE GOT YOUR MONEY ALREADY!”

Gorilla and Bobby talk for a bit.

Team Ric Flair vs. Team Roddy Piper

Ric Flair, Ted DiBiase, The Mountie, The Warlord

Roddy Piper, Bret Hart, Davey Boy Smith, Virgil

Roddy was Flair’s first feud in the company as not only did you know the matches would be good, but the promos would be awesome too. Bret was feuding with Mountie over the IC Title, Smith was feuding with Warlord over who was stronger and Virgil was feuding with DiBiase because who else was he going to feud with?

Flair has the REAL World Title with him here, which is mosaiced but if you know your titles, you can see a WWF Tag Team Title, which looks really weird if you’re in the arena (if you’re not familiar with what I’m talking about, the short version is Flair was NWA Champion, left the NWA, wasn’t paid back for the deposit he put down on the belt, brought it to the WWF, got sued, and couldn’t use the title in the angle they were doing anymore so they would substitute in another belt which was censored in storyline.)

Big reaction for Bret, who has finally split from Neidhart and is IC Champion as of Summerslam. DiBiase starts for his team against Piper which is a pretty awesome match. No managers are allowed at ringside this year but Sherri is there anyway. Flair sneaks in and blasts Piper in the back to give Ted an early advantage. Piper atomic drops Ted and Sherri comes in to choke him which somehow isn’t a DQ. Piper kisses her and punches DiBiase to take over.

Sherri is sent to the back and Roddy brings in Smith. The good guys work over the arm of DiBiase with Virgil of all people getting the biggest pop. After all four go in they start going around again with all four getting in another set of shots on the arm. Bret stays in but misses a knee in the corner to put himself in trouble. They trade near falls before Bret takes him right back down by the arm.

DiBiase hiptosses him down and wisely tags in Flair. Bret starts with some of his favorite moves before tagging in Davey Boy to slingshot Flair into the corner. Piper wants in but Flair stops the tag. There’s the gorilla press to Flair and the tag to Piper, drawing a BIG pop from the crowd. Piper goes nuts with punches, knocking Flair to the floor where we get a Flair Flop.

Back inside and it’s off to Warlord who Piper wants to try a test of strength against. Piper is just playing though and brings in Smith for the big power match. Smith hits some shoulder blocks but misses a charge and it’s off to Mountie. Bret tags in and Mountie immediately hits the floor. Instead here’s DiBiase who gets elbowed off the middle rope for two. Ted and Bret hit head to head and both guys are down.

Mountie is willing to get in there now but it’s back to Davey instead. Smith gorilla presses Mountie and pumps him about three times before slamming him down for no cover. Off to Flair who chops away at the Bulldog which doesn’t work at all. DiBiase and Flair try a double team but get double clotheslined instead. There’s the powerslam to Mountie but he’s not legal. Flair comes off the top with a shot to the back of Smith’s head for the pin and the elimination. Both guys were legal too.

Piper immediately charges in but Flair tags DiBiase back instead. Flair comes in to face a downed Piper but Ric is put in the Figure Four almost immediately. Off to Mountie vs. Virgil and Mountie can’t get a tag out from anyone, because everyone is afraid of Virgil. I can’t say I blame them. He might tell them about how great he is. Flair comes in and has zero luck so it’s DiBiase vs. Virgil again. Ted powerslams him down and it’s immediately back to the Warlord.

Virgil gets sent to the floor and Flair sends him into the steps, with Virgil doing an awful job of pretending to slam into them. The full nelson goes on but everything breaks down and Bret comes off the top to take out Warlord, giving the illegal Piper the pin to tie us up at 3. Piper vs. DiBiase now before Virgil is quickly tagged in. Virgil slaps the Million Dollar Dream on DiBiase but Ted sends him into the buckle to escape.

Here’s Flair again with a belly to back supelx before it’s back to Mountie. Every remaining heel takes their shots on Virgil which is likely the best possibly option. I mean, do you want VIRGIL getting the hot tag? Flair covers him for two and puts his feet on the ropes because that’s what Flair does. DiBiase comes in and ducks his head, only to get caught by a swinging neckbreaker. There’s the hot tag to Piper who no sells everything Flair throws at him. Everything breaks down and Flair is sent to the floor. That’s important because the referee disqualifies EVERYONE in the ring, but Flair was outside and is the sole survivor.

Rating: B. Gah this was going AWESOME until the pretty lame ending. Having Flair be the sole survivor is a smart move though as it makes the fans hate him even more. This was a GREAT setup though and was on pace to be a classic before the ending. To be fair though, at the pace they were going the match would have been an hour long if they were going to do a full version. Still though, what we got was very good.

Gene is on the platform and brings out Savage to talk about Jake, because we can’t have the match on this show so let’s talk about it instead. Savage talks about being bitten by the snake and being able to see and hear Liz crying, which is the worst thing Jake could do. He promises to be all over Jake like melted butter. Oh man stuff just got REAL. Liz comes out which is a big deal apparently. As usual, she has nothing to say.

Gorilla thinks Tuesday in Texas may be on TV! Give me a break.

Team Mustafa vs. Team Slaughter

Colonel Mustafa, Berzerker, Skinner, Hercules

Sgt. Slaughter, Tito Santana, Jim Duggan, Texas Tornado

A lot of these guys are on their way out. Hercules would be in WCW by May, Tornado would job to the stars until leaving in July as would Mustafa (Iron Sheik), and the rest of the guys would do nothing of note for the rest of their time in the company. Kerry (Tornado) looks high as a kite and almost falls off the apron getting into the ring. This is pretty recently after Slaughter’s face turn as he was a heel at Summerslam. This isn’t exactly the most talent laden match ever and the only feud is Slaughter vs. Mustafa.

Tito and Skinner start with Santana taking over with a headlock. There’s the flying forearm out of nowhere and Skinner hits the floor without a cover. Off to Berzerker vs. Tornado which would work a lot better down in Dallas. Berzerker (a crazy viking who tried to stab Undertaker with a sword) misses a dropkick and it’s off to Mustafa. After some very brief offense, Kerry tumbles to his corner and brings in Duggan to face Hercules, which was in the first ever match at Survivor Series.

Duggan gets taken down by double and triple teaming and it’s off to Mustafa. He loads up his curled boots (it’s a Sheik thing) and does nothing with them. Thanks for wasting our time with that. Duggan pounds away and backdrops Mustafa down before the hot tag to Slaughter. The big showdown is an atomic drop and a clothesline to Mustafa for the elimination.

Berzerker comes in with some clotheslines and a kick to the fat gut of Slaughter. A boot to Slaughter’s face puts him down and it’s off to Hercules for some two counts. Back to the viking who gets crotched on the top rope and kicked in the legs. Off to Duggan who clotheslines Berzerker to the floor and backdrops him back there a few seconds later. Tornado comes in and pounds away on him before it’s off to Hercules again. Tito gets a blind tag and hits a forearm to the back of the head (El Paso Del Muerte) for the pin and the elimination.

Skinner, the guy that owned now former developmental program FCW, comes in as it’s 4-2. When you have Skinner and Berzerker as your only guys left, the team is in big trouble. A blind tag brings in Slaughter who rolls up Skinner for the elimination. Slaughter whips Berzerker into Duggan’s clothesline for the elimination and the win.

Rating: F. The match sucked, it was never in doubt, and the biggest deal on the heel team was Skinner, who would get an IC Title shot soon after this. What a horrible match and one of the most worthless ones in the history of the show so far, which is covering quite a bit of ground. Nothing to see here at all.

Here’s Jake to plug Tuesday in Texas some more. To be fair, Trust Me Jake was AWESOME. Jake swears he didn’t know that the snake had venom in it still but making Liz cry excited him. God has told Jake that God doesn’t like Okerlund, so let’s blame everyone but Jake. I said he was awesome, not that he made sense. No reptiles are allowed at the match between Savage and Roberts. He wants to kiss Liz and that’s about it.

We recap Hogan vs. Taker. Flair confronted Hogan in Taker’s Funeral Parlor and went off on him about hearing about Hogan for years. Now Flair is here and wants to know what Hogan is going to do about it. Hogan pulled off the shirt and Taker came out of a standing casket behind Hulk and hit him with the urn. Piper and Savage ran out of the broadcast booth with chairs but Taker literally swatted away Savage’s swing. Taker rips Hogan’s cross off ala Andre in 87 and leaves.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan

Taker is “undefeated” here, which means overseas tours and house shows don’t count because Tito beat him in Spain and Warrior beat him on a bunch of house shows. Feeling out process to start with no one being able to get a real advantage. Taker shoulders Hogan and Hulk regroups a bit while Taker reaches to the urn. Back in and Taker chokes away in the corner in a shot you see in a lot of Taker video packages.

Bearer chokes Hogan a bit and Taker slams him. A big elbow misses and the place pops loudly. Hulk pounds away but he can’t put Taker down. A slam doesn’t work nor does an elbow to the head. Hogan clotheslines Taker to the floor where the dead man lands on his feet and pulls Hogan outside. Back in and Taker chokes away some more as does Bearer. Taker starts smothering him as you can see the Hogan super fan, a guy who dressed up like Hulk (including yellow trunks) sitting in the front row and freaking out.

This hold goes on for a good while, which is just Taker having his hand on Hogan’s face and doing nothing else. By long I mean like two and a half minuets. When the whole match is only thirteen minutes, that’s a long stretch. Hogan comes back with some shoulder blocks that don’t do much, only to have Taker clothesline him down again. There’s the Tombstone but Hogan is up before a cover. He pounds away on Taker and knocks him down to one knee which is a new thing for Taker.

Hogan gets a good slam as Flair is on his way to the ring. I miss that black and white robe. That thing was spiffy. Hogan takes out Flair with a right hand and big boots Taker, only to have Bearer grab his leg. Taker loads up the Tombstone as Flair slides in a chair. The piledriver on the chair gives us a new world champion and a decisive face pop for the dead man. Taker holding the title like it’s a coupon for a free coffee at a Shell station is a nice touch.

Rating: D. Yeah this match completely sucked but we have a new champion and a reason to watch Flair vs. Hogan, which never happened for various reason. Hogan would beat Taker for the title at Tuesday in Texas six days later, but the title would be held up and decided in the Rumble, where Flair would win it and set up Wrestlemania. Bad match, but a BIG moment.

People come out to check on Hogan as Gorilla rips into Flair. Hogan takes awhile to leave, likely to let the fans get over some of their shock.

Roddy is in the back and goes on a big rant against Tunney and Flair and Taker.

Flair and Perfect say they told us this would happen and now they’ve been proven right. Flair is the REAL World Champion now. Tunney needs to stop distorting the belt.

Intermission, which means we see a graphic for fifteen minutes.

Gene recaps what’s happened so far in case someone ordered the PPV halfway through for some reason.

The Natural Disasters and IRS are ready for the LOD and Boss Man. That’s the main event people. They’re not even hiding the screwing over of the fans anymore.

LOD and the Boss Man are ready too. Seriously there’s nothing else to say here. They say exactly what you would expect them to say and nothing else. Hawk gets ready to do the WHAT A RUSH line but as he loads it up, Sean interrupts him to say Gene is with Jack Tunney. Hawk gives him a look that would stop a tank and says his catchphrase, then lets Sean throw it to Gene.

Tunney announces Hogan vs. Taker II at Tuesday in Texas. He’ll be at ringside as well, which makes the boredom levels shoot through the roof, if that’s even possible.

Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers

Nasty Boys, Beverly Brothers

Rockers, Bushwhackers

This is right before the Rockers split and they’re already having issues. This is regular rules, which means individual eliminations and not one loss means both team members are gone. Butch and Knobbs get things going as Gorilla and Bobby talk about Hogan vs. Taker II. Butch hits a running knee lift and it’s off to Luke. The Whackers take over on the Nasties with a pair of double clotheslines.

The Beverly Brothers come in and do about as well as the Nasties with both Brothers taking a Battering Ram. The Rockers double dropkick the Nasties and the good guys have cleared the ring. It’s Shawn vs. Beau (the other is Blake) now as the announcers debate which guy on either team is the brains. A backbreaker puts Shawn down and it’s back to Knobbs. Luke comes in and avoids a splash in the corner but whacks his arms too much, allowing Knobbs to hit a middle rope clothesline for the elimination.

Off to Shawn vs. Sags with Jerry suplexing him down. Gorilla talks about how tonight will culminate at Tuesday in Texas. Again, screw you fans who bought this, as you just got part one. Some idiot fan stands up and poses for the camera so the shots keep cutting away a lot. The Rockers work on Sags’ arm before it’s off to Blake. Gorilla somehow can’t tell the Rockers apart, even though they pretty much look nothing alike.

A superkick puts Blake down but Beverly comes back with knees in the corner. Marty comes off the middle rope and shoves the referee for no apparent reason. It doesn’t go anywhere so I guess it was a mistake. Must be Colombian coke for Marty tonight. Off to Beau who doesn’t do much other than allow a tag to Butch who cleans house. The Beverlies double team him with a backdrop into a facejam for the pin and the elimination.

It’s Nasties/Beverlies vs. Rockers now with Marty coming in again. Marty monkey flips and ranas Beau down for two as Heenan and Gorilla trade statements of excitement. An enziguri puts Beau down again and it’s off to an armbar. It’s also off to Shawn who doesn’t do as well as you would expect against one of the Beverly Brothers. Off to Blake who jumps over Beau and lands on Shawn’s back in a move that the World’s Greatest Tag Team made famous.

Out of nowhere Shawn grabs a backslide on Beau for the pin to make it 3-1. Sags is in next as Gorilla thinks Marty should reach further for a tag. Even though the Rockers would split less than a month later, it wasn’t clear yet who would have gotten the super push. The Nasties head to the floor and Shawn clotheslines Sags off the apron and superkicks Knobbs down. Back in and Sags takes over again. Marty’s eyes are just gone and he looks awful.

Blake comes in again and gets kicked in the face, allowing for a falling tag to Marty. A big jumping back elbow takes Knobbs down and a snapmare gets two. Knobbs takes Jannetty down again and Heenan talks about Tuesday in Texas. Off to Sags with a powerslam and a belly to back suplex before it’s back to Knobbs. Marty gets his knees up to stop a middle rope splash and there’s the tag to Shawn. Everything breaks down and Marty swings Sags’ feet into Shawn’s face, resulting in Knobbs rolling Michaels up for the pin.

That leaves us with Marty vs. Blake and the Nasties which I don’t see going well for the coke head. Shawn freaks out on him before he leaves too to even further tease the tension. Marty starts with Knobbs and hits a middle rope bulldog but Jerry takes him down almost immediately and knocks him to the floor. A powerslam from Blake puts Marty down and the Nasties head to the floor. Jannetty dives on both of them and slams Blake’s face into the mat. Marty hooks a terrible looking small package on Sags but Knobbs rolls them over to give Jerry the final eliminating pin.

Rating: D. Man alive this was a long match. That’s the problem the rest of this show has created: there’s nothing else worth watching for the rest of the night and now they’re just filling in time to say that you’re getting a PPV that means something, when really you need to see the sequel to get the full thing. But hey, who cares about treating the fans right when you can get their money?

Gorilla and Bobby plug Tuesday in Texas again.

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

This is your main event people. Let that sink in for a minute. The LOD are the tag champions and IRS and Boss Man are having a worthless midcard feud. Boss Man and IRS start things off with the tax dude (if you need help figuring out who that is you’re beyond my help) getting thrown all over the place. Off to Animal vs. Earthquake which fires the crowd up a bit.

They collide and Animal’s cross body is caught in a backbreaker in an impressive display of strength from Quake. Back to IRS to face Hawk with the latter working on the arm. Typhoon gets the tag, only to have IRS thrown at him by Hawk. Off to Earthquake who carries Hawk to the heel corner. IRS and Boss Man come in again and it’s a briefcase shot to Boss Man’s head for the elimination.

It’s Typhoon vs. Animal now and the Disasters double team Animal in the corner. Quake suplexes him down as Monsoon talks about Bobo Brazil. IRS hits a top rope right hand for two and Typhoon puts on a bearhug. Animal escapes and hits a clothesline before tagging in Hawk. IRS misses a briefcase shot to the head and hits Typhoon by mistake, giving Hawk the easy pin.

Quake wants to fight IRS now but walks off with Typhoon instead, making it the LOD vs. IRS. Hawk powerslams IRS down but a charge goes shoulder first into the post. Hawk gets sent face first into the steps as we continue to fill time by having IRS look like he has a chance. We hit the chinlock as the announcers talk about Thanksgiving dinner. Not hot tag brings in Animal who cleans whatever is left in the house. IRS tries to walk out but runs into Boss Man in the aisle. Hawk hits a top rope clothesline for the win.

Rating: D+. We go from Hogan vs. Andre II to this in five years? That should give you a good idea as to what you’ve got going on with this show. The match was nothing and there was no reason to get excited about it, because the whole reason the match was happening had been postponed to Tuesday. In Texas.

Hogan won’t talk to the cameras about what happened.

Gene is in the bowels of the building with Bearer and Taker. Hogan will rest in peace. In Texas. They look in a casket to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Let’s take a look at what we had on this show: a really good opener, a horrible second match, a bad yet historic third match, a bad fourth match, and a worthless fifth match. This is all interspersed with a bunch of commercials for Tuesday in Texas, which is possibly the biggest bait and switch in company history. This show made me mad because it’s a big flip off to the fans, and that’s not acceptable. Watch the opener and that’s about it.

Ratings Comparison

Team Flair vs. Team Piper

Original: A-

Redo: B

Team Slaughter vs. Team Mustafa

Original: F

Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: C-

Redo: D

Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers

Original: D

Redo: D

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating:

Original: D+

Redo: D-

A little worse this time, but the same problems still plague this show. Screw you Vince.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

Survivor Series 1989
Date: November 23, 1989
Location: Rosemont Horizon, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 15,294
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

This was one of two options for me to redo this year and since I did the 1996 show just two years ago and this is my favorite era, it wasn’t all that hard of a choice. It’s actually an interesting show as there are a few experiments taking place which could make for something fun to watch. Let’s get to it.

We open with the Saturday Night’s Main Event style promos from people on the show. This is already off to a cool start.

Hulk Hogan is happy that he’s healthy, but also for his team of Hulkamaniacs at the Survivor Series. I’m very glad he pointed out the name of the show we’ve paid to see.

Ted DiBiase is happy that he’s rich.

Jake Roberts is happy for the DDT.

Demolition is glad that they don’t have to fight each other. Fair point.

Randy Savage and Sherri are happy that he’s the only man worthy of being the Macho King.

Jim Duggan loves the USA. Sounds like a run of the mill day for him.

Dino Bravo is glad to have the Earthquake on his side.

Dusty Rhodes likes his polka dots.

Big Boss Man likes dishing out justice.

Brutus Beefcake likes wrestling, strutting and cutting. I wonder in what order.

Rick Martel is glad for his good looks.

Rick Rude is thankful for his ravishing body. Narcissism must run in the Rick family.

Roddy Piper is thankful for not being Ricky Rude.

The Genius….I think you can guess this one.

Mr. Perfect for being perfect. Kind of one dimensional no?

The Bushwhackers are glad for stuffing in turkey. Freaks.

Bobby Heenan is thankful for spending time with his family. The HEENAN Family that is.

The Ultimate Warrior for intensity. I’m stunned.

Vince McMahon narrates a card rundown. There’s something so weird about him being the voiceover guy. I miss those squares that show the match participants. Oh and team names other than Team Insert Name Here. You can’t think of some alliterative name? Like Rotten Writers?

One thing I’m thankful for: that the dark match was dark. This night got started with Boris Zhukov beating Paul Roma. I wouldn’t wish that on Vince Russo.

Enforcers vs. Dream Team

Big Boss Man, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel, Honky Tonk Man
Dusty Rhodes, Brutus Beefcake, Red Rooster, Tito Santana

As usual, this is mainly about the captains, but at least we get some Jive Soul Bro and Brutus Beefcake music, because the 80s were that awesome. Actually almost everyone involved here had great music. Again, the 80s were awesome. Dusty even has Boss Man’s nightstick because stealing things is part of the American dream. Tito and Honky Tonk start things off because Tito vs. Martel on pay per view wasn’t allowed for some reason. An early armbar has Honky Tonk in trouble but a cheap shot allows Martel to come in.

The pace picks way up as they run the ropes and Martel scores with a dropkick. Tito is right back with an atomic drop into a rollup for two so it’s off to Boss Man, who gets armdragged in a hurry. Dusty comes in and you can feel the energy go up. I’m not the biggest fan but that man had more charisma than almost anyone ever. With the dancing jabs out of the way, Brutus comes in and gets pounded down by Boss Man.

Honky Tonk misses a right hand so it’s back to Martel for a backbreaker. Some knees to the back don’t do much so it’s off to Rooster as it becomes clear how much better the names were back then. Boss Man, Dream, Model, Bad News, Brutus and….well ok there was no saving Rooster. Speaking of Rooster, it’s his turn to get beaten up by a revolving door of villains. Ventura is right there talking about how the size difference is working against Rooster, almost like he’s a real analyst.

A sunset flip finally gets two on Honky Tonk and a collision puts both guys down. That’s enough for the tag off to Tito for some serious house cleaning but it’s too early for the Figure Four. Martel slams him down and misses his elbow that always misses. Tito grabs a rollup but Martel reverses into one of his own and a grab of the trunks (not sure how much that would help here) gets rid of Santana at 9:15.

Dusty comes in and we cut to a shot of a “fan”, who will later be named Sapphire. Considering she hasn’t been officially introduced yet and would be gone just after Summerslam 1990, it’s kind of remarkable that she was only around for about nine months. Anyway Martel gets taken down with a dropkick and the big elbow gets two. It’s back to Rooster for what looks like some dancing and a headlock, which is quickly countered into a backbreaker.

The bearhug from Boss Man has Rooster in even more trouble until he bites his way to freedom. Boss Man tags Bad News (again, great names) but he doesn’t want to come in, meaning Rooster has to pull him in. Ever the serious one, Bad News isn’t about to have any of this stupid gimmick and beats the heck out of Rooster.

Boss Man comes in without a tag and accidentally hits Bad News. Oh dear I don’t see this going well. Before Bad News can use them all as floss, he walks out on his teammates and is counted out at 15:30. The melee allows Brutus to come back in and hammer on Boss Man until an elbow to the jaw cuts him down. Honky Tonk comes back in for two off a belly to back suplex and shrugs off some right hands (90% of Brutus’ offense). He can’t shrug off the high knee (5%, along with the sleeper for the remaining 5% as Brutus wasn’t exactly versatile) and it’s 3-2 at 17:24.

Martel comes in next and chinlocks Brutus down, followed by a backbreaker to put Brutus on the apron. Brutus comes back in with a sunset flip though, and after Martel gets caught grabbing the ropes, Boss Man is on his own at 20:13. Rooster comes in (Dusty is kind of a lame partner) and tries some forearms, only to get caught in the Boss Man Slam for the elimination at 21:00. Now Dusty is willing to come in for the big right hands and Brutus adds some chops. Boss Man is rocked so Dusty comes in with with a crossbody for the final pin at 21:59.

Rating: C-. It was dull at times, but there’s only so much you can get out of some of these people. Honky Tonk was past his expiration date, Rooster was Rooster, Brown was barely involved, Tito vs. Martel should have been its own match, and Dusty was only in there for a little while. The match wasn’t bad and it was a good way to start things off, but there were only two feuds of note in the whole match.

Post match Slick throws Boss Man the nightstick and it’s a heck of a beating for Dusty and Brutus. Dusty even gets handcuffed and beaten down on the ropes, drawing some blood. Well….were you expecting anything else from him? Brutus finally makes the save with the clippers.

In the back, Boss Man says Dusty is his prisoner. Well your prisoner is currently in the middle of a big arena and being let out of handcuffs. I see why Boss Man left the prison job.

The 4×4’s, all carrying 2×4’s, are ready for the King’s Court. Bret Hart says it’ll be their finest hour. Ronnie Garvin wants to use his board for uh….things. Hercules doesn’t think they’ll have any problems. Jim Duggan says their team is ready for anything.

4×4’s vs. King’s Court

Jim Duggan, Ronnie Garvin, Bret Hart, Hercules
Randy Savage, Canadian Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Greg Valentine

Yeah it’s the Canadian Earthquake because that you don’t want him confused with the Costa Rican Earthquake. The 4×4’s clear the ring with the boards and then try to toss them to each other. Garvin messes up because he’s Ronnie Garvin and a natural failure. Duggan follows Savage to the floor to start and hands it off to Hercules for a forearm to the back. A gorilla press sends Savage into the corner for a tag to Valentine for the atomic drop and the traditional funny sell job.

Bret comes in to work on the arm and Duggan sends said arm into the buckle. It’s off to Hercules for some forearms on the also legal Bravo but Earthquake comes in, runs him over, and hits the Earthquake for the elimination at 3:57. Duggan tries his luck with some shoulders that have no effect, so Bret gets behind Earthquake to trip him down on a third try. Garvin comes in and I suddenly want to see Earthquake crush him like a grape.

The Court starts taking turns on Garvin, including a top rope ax handle from Savage. A quick backslide gets two on Bravo but it’s already back to Savage for the snap jabs in the corner. Valentine comes back in though and since we’re not ten minutes into the match yet, Duggan makes a blind tag and clotheslines him out to even things up at 7:32.

Savage comes in and snaps Duggan’s throat across the top rope and it’s back to Earthquake for some forearms to the back. The Court is certainly making good tags to take their turns. Earthquake misses the big elbow so it’s off to Garvin to chop and headbutt Bravo. There’s the Garvin Stomp (it’s stupid when Randy Orton does it too) but Bravo rakes the eyes to break up the Sharpshooter.

It’s off to Hart vs. Savage and Randy PANICS as the crowd really wakes up. You better believe those Bret pops were being noticed, even if it took two years to get to the solo run. Savage gets taken down and runs off for the tag to Bravo so Bret beats him up instead. Garvin comes in again and is IMMEDIATELY side suplexed for the elimination at 11:18. I never get over how much Garvin absolutely sucks. He just got pinned clean by DINO BRAVO. What in the world does that say about your career?

Duggan hammers on Earthquake again before handing it back to Bret for a matchup I never knew I wanted to see. Bret wants Savage though and Jesse, a big fan of both guys, is rather pleased by these developments. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Duggan, ever the All-American, chokes behind the referee’s back. A missed knee drop makes things even worse for Savage and Bret gets two off a backbreaker. Bret misses the middle rope elbow (a regular one as he didn’t have his signature version down yet) though and it’s back to Bravo for the bearhug.

It’s back to Earthquake for some choking and a two count with the fans being rather pleased by the kickout. Bret avoids a Savage charge to send him into Bravo though and now the hot tag brings Duggan back in. For reasons of temporary insanity (or maybe sanity in his case), Savage drives Duggan into his own corner so Hart can tag himself in. A quick missed charge hits the post though and Bravo adds a shoulder breaker, setting up Savage’s elbow for the elimination at 19:07.

So it’s Duggan alone against Bravo, Earthquake and Savage, meaning Jim is looking completely fine. Earthquake unloads on him in the corner and the level of fine is starting to come down. Duggan beats up all three of them without much effort (Behold the power of AMERICA! Ignoring that Savage is from AMERICA of course!) and tosses the whole team outside.

As the announcers try to figure out who is legal, Earthquake comes back in and drops the big elbow for two. Savage hits the ax handle but misses the running crotch attack. Since the guys kind of suck at this, Sherri low bridges Duggan to the floor and it’s a countout at 23:25 to finish Duggan off.

Rating: D+. The strange ending aside (Duggan can’t take a pin here? Not even 3-1 with the new big monster and RANDY SAVAGE on the other team?), this wasn’t all that thrilling of a match. Other than the fans going coconuts for Hart, it was a lot of punching and kicking and very little more. It also wasn’t the biggest surprise, as any team with Hercules and Ronnie Garvin on the team and JIM DUGGAN as the brains of the operation is in serious trouble.

Post match Duggan cleans house with the 2×4.

Dusty Rhodes is very hurt but Gene Okerlund is sure that he’ll be dishing out Americana soon enough.

The Genius has a poem saying he’s smart and how stupid the fans are. That’s such a simple gimmick but it’s one that would work so well today. Give him a guitar and he’s basically Elias with a better vocabulary.

Million Dollar Team vs. Hulkamaniacs

Ted DiBiase, Powers of Pain, Zeus
Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts

I’m not going to explain Zeus in full again because it just makes my head hurt. You know what doesn’t make my head hurt? The most awesome Survivor Series team in the history of the planet. I mean seriously, Hogan, Roberts and Demolition. Someone please try to find something that matches that level of amazing so I can point at you can call you stupid.

Just in case it’s not enough yet, the villains won’t let them in the ring (Jesse: “Count all four of them out!”) so Jake throws Damien in, because the most awesome Survivor Series team in the history of the planet has A BIG FREAKING SNAKE TOO! Still one of my favorite moments ever and something I still throw on if I need a smile.

Zeus wants Hogan to start so Gorilla goes into his weird questions about what the Z on Zeus’ head is for. Like….what else do you think it’s for? He’s a big Zorro fan? I mean, he should be because Zorro is so awesome that he would be first on the list if this team ever needed a fifth man but I still don’t get that rant. Hogan of course can’t hurt Zeus to start as the right hands and clotheslines have no effect.

A jumping knee does nothing so Hogan rakes the eyes and gets in a slam, which does all the damage of a standard slam. Zeus pops up and cranks on Hogan’s neck, in a spot that the Giant would use to put him on the shelf for weeks in WCW. A bunch of choking and a shove of the referee are enough for the DQ to get rid of Zeus at 3:20.

Zeus won’t stop choking and it takes the combined forces of the Powers of Pain and DiBiase offering money to get him off. Hogan is mostly dead so DiBiase comes in to drop some knees. More choking keeps Hogan in trouble but he finally gets a boot up in the corner and brings Jake in. The beating begins in a hurry and it’s off to Demolition for the rapid fire pounding to the back (I could watch that for at least a minute). Hulk is fine enough to come back in for a middle rope ax handle as Gorilla goes on about the Z on Zeus’ head again.

DiBiase elbows Ax in the face and brings in Warlord because the Powers of Pain vs. Demolition is still a thing a year after it was a bigger thing at the previous year’s show. A clothesline gets Ax out of trouble but Mr. Fuji trips him up, allowing Warlord to drop a headbutt for the pin at 9:52.

It’s off to Hogan to beat up Warlord in a match you would think would have happened at some point. Jake comes in and the fans want the DDT but have to settle for Smash hitting an ax handle to the back instead. Not quite the same thing. Barbarian kicks him in the face though and it’s DiBiase coming back in with a middle rope ax handle (the most popular move on the show).

The falling punch (still cool) gets two and we hit the chinlock. DiBiase misses the middle rope falling elbow (as always) but Smash still won’t tag for no apparent reason. Barbarian tags himself in and takes Smash’s head off with a top rope clothesline for the elimination at 13:44. Jake comes in but can’t DDT Barbarian no matter how many times he tries. The beating continues as Hulk is dying for a tag.

Some knee drops and a piledriver get two on Roberts but Barbarian misses the Swan Dive. There’s the hot tag to Hogan (Jesse: “Uh oh.”) and it’s time to clean house. The rapid elbows and a suplex give Hogan two (you don’t see him getting many near falls) and he clotheslines both Powers down. They pop back up and hit a spike piledriver….for a double DQ at 19:51, sending Jesse over the edge in an awesome rant. And yeah, that’s completely bogus, especially with Hogan and Roberts now having a 2-1 advantage over DiBiase.

The Million Dollar Dream has Hogan in trouble and Roberts has to save Hogan at two arm drops (Jesse: “THAT’S THREE TIMES! THREE TIMES! HOW COME ROBERTS WASN’T DISQUALIFIED???”). Hogan fights out of another attempt and punches DiBiase out of the air (because he was trying ANOTHER ax handle). The latest hot tag brings in Roberts for a neck snap across the top rope, giving us another great DiBiase sell.

Cue Virgil with his bad hand so Roberts beats him up too, including a DDT to a big pop. With Roberts down, DiBiase gets in the fist drop and throws his feet on the ropes to get rid of Jake at 23:42. Hogan is still down from the Million Dollar Dream so DiBiase picks him up and hits a clothesline for two. A chinlock goes on and Hogan slaps DiBiase’s arm, which would be shocking to see today. The comeback gives us a double clothesline but Hogan is up first and hits exactly what you would expect to set up the legdrop for the pin at 27:32.

Rating: C-. I love the face team but my goodness they picked a really weird way to get to the finish here. Hogan and company were either even or ahead for most of the match and Hogan just wins with ease in the end. What’s a better way to go here: the usual, or Zeus, who Hogan is feuding with at the moment, wrecking Hogan so badly that DiBiase pins him to set up a title program with DiBiase down the line? I wasn’t feeling this one, but the energy (and Jesse ranting) helped it a lot.

Jesse is LIVID post match, saying the referee probably even disqualified Virgil too.

Savage and Zeus, who face Beefcake and Hogan in a cage match in a few weeks, are ready to take care of business inside the cage. Sherri waving her hands in the background for some reason is a little distracting.

Hogan comes in to Beefcake’s locker room and they’re ready to win in the cage. Sherri comes in and throws powder in their eyes so the beatdown can be on.

We run down the remaining two matches.

As intermission continues, Jesse talks about issues inside the Heenan Family, including pushing and shoving in the locker room.

The Rude Brood is ready to win tonight. Rick Rude talks about his great teammates, Mr. Perfect knows how to get rid of Jimmy Snuka and the Rougeau Brothers have been training extra hard.

Roddy Piper can’t get his team to quit eating before the match. I remember this from when I was a kid and it’s still bizarre.

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Rick Rude, Mr. Perfect, Rougeau Brothers
Roddy Piper, Jimmy Snuka, Bushwhackers

There’s no Heenan with Rude, playing up the issues in the Family. Perfect jumps Luke from behind to start so it’s already off to Butch for a bite of the leg. Piper and Snuka bite the arm and it’s back to Butch to bite the back for a second helping. Jacques comes in and nips up but stops for a hug from his brother. We settle down to Jacques flipping over Snuka but getting taken down by a flying headbutt. A chop keeps Jacques in trouble and Snuka….I want to say dances? With Jacques down, the Superfly Splash is good for the elimination at 4:01.

Rude comes in for a leapfrog and a hip swivel before handing it off to Perfect. A botched low bridge sends Perfect outside as the Brood can’t get anything going at all. Luke comes in for a snapmare on Perfect and Snuka punches him in the face. The fast tags continue with Butch coming in for a few knees to the back. Piper’s atomic drop knocks Perfect over for the tag to Raymond, whose backdrop is countered into a sunset flip for two. Raymond gets two off a superkick but Piper grabs a piledriver for the second elimination at 7:39.

Perfect is in next for a snapmare of his own on Piper but gets catapulted into the corner as only Perfect could do. Butch comes in for some near falls off some stomping but a single kick to the chest knocks him into the corner. That means it’s back to Piper for some right hands and a hip swivel at Rick as Perfect is turned inside out. Butch adds another bite but gets rolled up for the elimination at 10:45.

Piper is right back in for a rollup of his own and Snuka adds a top rope chop to the head. It’s Luke’s turn to hammer away and a headbutt to the ribs gets two. Perfect is able to make a tag but Rude gets punched out of the air. Not that it matters though as a kick to the ribs sets up the Rude Awakening to even things up at 12:14.

So now we can have the match that they wanted in the first place, which definitely sounds better. Rude chops Snuka down and throws in a hip swivel before handing it back to Perfect, who gets kicked in the face. It’s already back to Rude for a chinlock, which goes nowhere either so Perfect comes in and gets small packaged for two. You really can tell that the energy has gone out of the arena and they’re just going through the motions with this one.

A ramming of the heads puts Perfect and Snuka down (should have knocked Perfect silly) and there’s the double tag. They slug it out, which is never a good idea against Piper. The fight falls to the floor and it’s a double countout at 18:36. So we’re down to Perfect vs. Snuka with Perfect making the mistake of ramming Snuka’s head into the buckle. Dude have you ever watched a Snuka match? A dropkick puts Snuka on the floor but he’s right back in for a pinfall reversal sequence. Snuka’s high crossbody is reversed into a cover for two but it’s the PerfectPlex to finish him at 21:27.

Rating: D. I’ve never liked this match as it was basically a delayed start until we got to the match that they really wanted to do. It also doesn’t really advance anything as Snuka vs. Perfect wasn’t a feud and Piper vs. Rude is right where it was before. At least Perfect got the win though and that’s what really matters, because he should have been ready to move up into the main event.

Post match Snuka goes after Perfect and Genius but the smart (and perfect) villains get away.

The Rude Brood says to not worry about Heenan’s whereabouts and promise to celebrate the ravishing way.

The Ultimate Warriors are ready to go. Jim Neidhart laughs a lot, the Rockers are their usual confident selves, and Ultimate Warrior says they all have organ donor cards. My goodness imagine the drug bills.

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Ultimate Warrior, Rockers, Jim Neidhart
Andre the Giant, Arn Anderson, Haku, Bobby Heenan

Heenan is out there because Tully Blanchard failed a drug test and is leaving, never to wrestle in a national promotion again. The fight starts before Warrior even shows up but here he is to save Neidhart as the bell rings. Three clotheslines put Andre on the floor and it’s a countout at 27 seconds, which is totally different than Zeus being eliminated earlier. Anderson’s “DANG IT” face is great, as always.

We settle down to Anderson getting beaten up by anyone who can get their hands on him, including the running tackle in the corner from Neidhart. Andre finally gets up and staggers out, with the Rockers getting in a few cheap shots. Haku comes in for some forearms to the back and Heenan chokes in the corner as Jesse says he would take Heenan over Gorilla in a fight. Before Gorilla can freak out, Haku superkicks Neidhart for the elimination at 3:31.

Michaels comes in to pick up the pace with a monkey flip before it’s off to Marty to start on the arm. Marty’s crossbody is caught but Shawn hits the dropkick to the back for the near fall. It’s back to Anderson, who can’t get a suplex, but Haku comes in to make it a double suplex, which is caught by Shawn in a nice save. Double superkicks get two and it’s off to Warrior for a backdrop. Heenan refuses the tag (well duh) so Anderson gets caught in an armbar instead.

Anderson takes him down with a shot to the ribs, hands it off to Heenan for a kick to the ribs, and then comes back in when Heenan gets touched once. That was the only way to go and it’s worth a chuckle. Anderson beats the heck out of Jannetty and Haku adds a few shots to knock Jannetty silly. Heenan comes back in for some stomps on Jannetty and a knee drop….for the clean pin at 8:54.

Egads how far have you fallen when you’re losing clean falls to Heenan? It’s instantly back to Anderson, who gets caught in Warrior’s bearhug. A rake to the eyes gets Anderson out of trouble so Haku gets bearhugged as well. It’s off to Michaels, who gets sent outside so Warrior has to toss him back inside. Heenan’s front facelock doesn’t work so here’s Anderson again for some stomping in the corner. Shawn is back up and rubs Anderson’s face into the mat, blinding him so badly that he tries to tag Warrior.

A Rocket Launcher gives Shawn two but for some reason it wakes Anderson up enough to take over again and bring in Haku. That just means a missed charge though and Shawn gets rid of him with a high crossbody at 12:54, leaving us with Shawn/Warrior vs. Anderson/Heenan. Four Hall of Famers isn’t too shabby. Heenan is willing to come in and punch Shawn a few times but Warrior scares him into the corner.

With Michaels on the floor, Heenan goes up (oh dear)…but climbs back down a few seconds later with a fit of sanity coming over him. Heenan refuses a tag so Anderson gets sunset flipped for two, sending him into a frenzy over the lack of a tag. Shawn gets knocked down so it’s back to Heenan, who tags out almost immediately again. Anderson wins a slugout and scores with some headbutts to the ribs in the corner as Warrior is shaking his head for some reason. Odd man indeed. There’s the spinebuster to get rid of Michaels at 15:48, though Anderson can barely move.

Some running shoulders have Anderson in trouble but he sidesteps a charging Warrior to send him outside. Heenan goes up again and again comes back down. Now Heenan is willing to come back in but when the no selling begins, Heenan’s time in the ring quickly comes to an end. Anderson sends him into the corner but Heenan won’t tag in again, probably being as smart as he can. Warrior rams them together and hits the gorilla press into the splash to get rid of Anderson at 18:16.

Reality hasn’t set in yet for Heenan so Warrior sneaks up on him…giving us a hilarious visual as Heenan slowly turns around. Jesse: “You’re loving this aren’t you Monsoon?” The beating begins in a hurry and Heenan is thrown over the corner to the floor. That’s enough for Heenan but Warrior throws him back inside for a shoulder and the splash for the final pin at 20:27.

Rating: D+. Heenan alone almost made this entertaining but there’s only so much that even he could do. The wrestling isn’t the point here and there’s nothing wrong with that. Warrior winning was never in doubt as his biggest challenge was eliminated in less than thirty seconds. Not a good match, but Heenan made it fun enough.

Post match Heenan staggers to the back, with Warrior running up behind him for one more clothesline.

A stills package ends the show to Warrior’s music.

Overall Rating: D. This one really didn’t work very well with a lot of punching and kicking matches and very little else. The storylines weren’t so much advanced as much as just storylines staying in one place. Having Hogan in the middle and Warrior in the main event was certainly an experiment but it was more odd than anything else. The energy goes away at the end of the third match and you can feel it being gone. I love it for the nostalgia, but there’s just not enough here.

Ratings Comparison

Dream Team vs. Enforcers

Original: B-
2012 Redo: C+
2018 Redo: C-

King’s Court vs. 4x4s

Original: B+
2012 Redo: D+
2018 Redo: D+

Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team

Original: D-
2012 Redo: C
2018 Redo: C-

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Original: D
2012 Redo: C-
2018 Redo: D

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Original: C+
2012 Redo: C-
2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D+
2012 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D

My original reviews continue to amaze me.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989 (Original): What A Weird Match

And the 2012 redo:

Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989 (2012): Bonus Round

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

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Summerslam 2021
Date: August 21, 2021
Location: Allegiant Stadium, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 51,326
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole, Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s time for one of the biggest Summerslams ever, as this is the first major event after the attendance restrictions were lifted after the Coronavirus pandemic. They need a major main event to make that work and that is what they have with John Cena challenging Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. Other than that, we have Bobby Lashley vs. Goldberg for the WWE Title because we must have Goldberg. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Big E. vs. Baron Corbin

Baron’s Happy days weren’t here yet. Some woman from Tik Tok is a guest ring announcer and Big E. doesn’t have his Money In The Bank briefcase as Corbin stole it from him. The rather sad Corbin clutches the briefcase and gets belly to belly suplexed to start. Big E. misses the apron splash though and Corbin is thrilled with the idea of winning via countout.

That doesn’t work so Corbin sends him into the post a few times, setting up the chinlock to keep Big E. down. A chokeslam is countered into a stretch muffler of all things but Corbin slips out and hits Deep Six for two. Corbin heads outside to grab the briefcase, earning himself a ram into the barricade. Back in and the Big Ending is good enough to finish Corbin at 6:31.

Rating: C. Set up a quick story on TV and then pay it off with a fast match here. That’s all you need to do for a Kickoff Show match and seeing the horrible loser take another loss will always work. Things would get better for Corbin soon, while Big E. would wind up having a pretty lame WWE Title reign, though at least he got there.

We’re in Las Vegas so the opening video has a poker theme, which lasts all of a few moments before going into the look at the matches, as expected. Also as expected, John Cena vs. Roman reigns feels way bigger than anything else.

Those stadium shows always look awesome and that is the case again here.

Raw Tag Team Titles: RKBro vs. AJ Styles/Omos

RKBro is challenging after reuniting last week to go after the titles. Orton and Styles start (not a bad choice) with Orton sending him flying with an early suplex. It’s off to Riddle so Styles bails to the floor and assaults the announcers’ table. Back in and Styles hands it off to Omos for the big slam on Riddle. Styles puts the chinlock on but Riddle elbows his way out of the fireman’s carry. That lets Riddle hit a running knee on Omos but Styles is there to cut off a diving tag to Orton.

The comeback is on, including a backdrop to Styles and forearms to Omos. Orton powerslams Styles and, after knocking Omos off the apron, hits the hanging DDT. Omos saves Styles from the RKO though and then chokeslams Riddle onto the apron. Riddle is back up with a posting for Omos but Styles is back with a moonsault from the apron into a reverse DDT to drop Riddle hard. Back in and Styles blocks the RKO, only to get caught with the second attempt to give Orton the pin and the titles at 7:05.

Rating: C+. The match wasn’t quite a classic but it makes perfect sense to put this on first. The fans loved RKBro and letting them have their big win was going to get the show started in the right direction. Styles and Omos were fine for a pretty nice title reign, but you’re only going to get so much out of that. Good choice for the opener here and Orton getting some focus is almost always a good thing.

Riddle being so freaking happy over the win is a great thing.

We recap Alexa Bliss vs. Eva Marie, which is over Bliss’ doll Lillie being all evil. Eva wanted Doudrop to go after Bliss but she was scared of the doll, meaning Eva and Doudrop aren’t in a great place coming in.

Eva Marie vs. Alexa Bliss

Doudrop is here with Marie. Sign in the crowd: “Eva Marie is worse than an airport tuna sandwich.” Points for creative, which cancels out the negative points for the massive CGI Lillie doll. During the entrance, we get a quick look at Lillie being able to sit up and wink, because of course she can. Bliss dodges a few charges to start and Eva falls out to the floor.

Back in and Bliss elbows her in the face as they’re going in very slow motion to start. Eva gets in a few shots but stops to slap Lillie, who she also uses to slap Bliss. That’s enough to send Bliss into a rage for some bad right hands, setting up a flipping splash for two. Doudrop insists that she believe in Eva as Lillie is sat back on top. Bliss sends her into the corner but misses Twisted Bliss to give Eva two. Back up and Bliss hits a DDT (which Marie falls too soon on) for the pin at 3:50. Doudrop seems well pleased.

Rating: D-. This was one of those matches that would have felt like a bad filler on Raw, let alone getting time on one of the biggest shows of the year. Eva was brought back in for star power but then she has a match like this and so much of it is dropped out the window. Bliss was better, but the Lillie stuff was killing her and that was getting more and more obvious every week.

Post match Doudrop makes sure to announce Eva as the loser of the match.

Mario Lopez, in a swank Hart Foundation shirt, brings in RKBro with Randy Orton promising that it is going to be smooths ailing for the team going forward. He’s still getting used to the Bro name though. Riddle has a surprise for him on Raw too, which would wind up being a scooter (with tassels).

United States Title: Sheamus vs. Damian Priest

Priest is challenging after beating Sheamus in a non-title match, where he re-injured Sheamus’ nose (hence a protective mask). Sheamus headlocks him down to start before switching into a hammerlock. Back up and Priest rocks him with a right hand before muscling him up for the Broken Arrow. Sheamus is sent outside so there’s the running step up flip dive to take him out again.

Priest’s spin kick is countered and he gets sent hard into the post, meaning it’s time to slow down a bit. A belly to back suplex sets up a chinlock but Priest is right back up. That works for Sheamus, who plants him with the Irish Curse and stops to pose. Priest powers out of another chinlock and hurricanranas his way out of a powerbomb, only to get powerslammed for two more.

Back up and Sheamus stops to check his hair, allowing Priest to get in a running tornado DDT but his back seems to be flaring up. The back is fine enough to hit a top rope spinwheel kick but Sheamus snaps him throat first across the top to break up a…..something. A top rope clothesline into an Alabama Slam gives Sheamus two and frustration is setting in.

The Brogue Kick is countered with a kick to the head though and Priest grabs South Of Heaven for two more. Sheamus knees him out of the air for two of his own and it’s off to a heel hook of all things. Priest fights up and rips off the mask, allowing him to hammer away. A kick to the face sets up the Reckoning to give Priest the pin and the title at 13:49.

Rating: B-. That’s the kind of big time fight that you need to have in a spot like this and they did the right thing with the ending. Priest took every big thing that Sheamus had and then won clean with his finisher. WWE set Priest up in the last few months and then paid him off with a win here, which is what you’re supposed to do. Nicely done.

We recap Dominik Mysterio causing issues for his dad, because they have literally been teasing this split for over a year now.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Mysterios

The Usos are defending. Rey hammers on Jimmy to start but it’s too early for the 619. The Usos are both sent outside with Rey hitting the sliding splash, followed by a springboard dive from Dominik. Dominik comes in for Three Amigos to Jimmy but Jey breaks up the frog splash with a shove out to the floor. The top rope Demolition Decapitator hits Dominik for no cover and Jimmy adds a running headbutt for two.

Dominik tries to fight out of the corner and gets BLASTED with an uppercut to drop him again. Jey hits Two Amigos and stops to pose before shouting some Spanish. A neckbreaker gets Dominik out of trouble though and there’s the hot tag to Mysterio to start cleaning house.

The tornado DDT gets two on Jimmy and the top rope seated senton puts him down again. Everything breaks down and it’s a superkick into the Superfly Splash for two on Rey. Dominik is back in and gets dropped on the apron like the schmuck that he is. Jimmy misses another Superfly Splash but he raises his knees to block a frog splash. The double superkick sets up the Superfly Splash to retain the titles at 10:48.

Rating: C+. The Usos and Rey managed to overcome Dominik’s extreme level of bleh to have a decent match. The Usos are able to have a pretty good match against anyone and that is what they did again here. It’s a rematch from another recent title change so there was only so much interest, but that has been the chance for either Tag Team Titles for years now.

Actress Tiffany Haddish introduces the new National Champion Damian Priest, who doesn’t like bullies. He likes being the UNITED STATES Champion though.

Rick Boogs plays new Intercontinental Champion Rick Boogs to the ring, allowing Pat McAfee to dance on the announcers’ table.

We recap Sasha Banks vs. Bianca Belair for the latter’s Smackdown Women’s Title. Belair beat her at Wrestlemania to win the title so Banks left (as she does) and then came back for a rematch. However, there were rumors that Banks wasn’t cleared to wrestle so things might be up in the air.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Hold on though as Banks isn’t cleared to compete (right) so we have a replacement.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Carmella

Belair is….hang on a second.

BECKY LYNCH IS BACK beats the heck out of Carmella, meaning we have a replacement (again).

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Becky Lynch

Belair is defending and it’s a right hand into the Manhandle Slam to make Lynch champion at 25 seconds.

And for those you keeping track, had it been Banks vs. Belair, it would indeed be the same story for Belair at back to back Summerslams.

WWE is going back to Saudi Arabia and yes, it’s amazing, mainly because they’ve been well paid to say so.

Tamyra Mensah-Stock and Gable Steveson, Olympic gold medal winners in wrestling, are here for a nice presentation.

We get the same WWE Shop commercial for the third time in less than two hours.

Drew McIntyre vs. Jinder Mahal

Mahal cost Drew Money in the Bank so tonight it’s about revenge with Mahal’s goons barred from ringside. McIntyre drives him into the corner to start and hits a quick clothesline, followed by the toss suplex. A trip to the floor goes badly for Mahal as well, so McIntyre throws him back inside for some begging. Mahal brings up their previous friendship before getting in a superkick for two. The chinlock doesn’t do much to McIntyre so it’s the Glasgow Kiss into a series of overhead belly to belly suplexes. The Futureshock into the Claymore finishes Mahal at 4:36.

Rating: D+. Yeah what were you expecting here? Mahal has long since stopped meaning anything so having McIntyre beat him without much trouble was the only way to go. That’s what they did here and it was a fine way to go, albeit in a bad match. You can only get so much out of a match that is this one sided though and that’s what brought this down.

Post match Veer and Shanky come to the ring to go after McIntyre, who chases them off with the sword.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match, with new champion Nikki Ash defending against Charlotte and Rhea Ripley. Nikki cashed in Money in the Bank on Charlotte, who had been beaten down by Ripley. Tonight it’s time to crush Nikki once and for all, because she has been treated like a loser since she won the title in the first place, because A, Charlotte and B, it’s a really stupid gimmick.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley vs. Nikki Ash

Nikki is defending and, after some Big Match Intros, gets shoved down by Charlotte to start. The monkey flip takes Charlotte down and a rollup gets two on Ripley. Back up and Charlotte tosses Nikki out, leaving Ripley to shoulder Charlotte into the corner. Nikki comes back in so Charlotte can beat up both of them at once, including slamming Ash onto Ripley for the double stack.

The moonsault hits Ripley’s raised boot though, leaving Nikki to counter Riptide into a crossbody for two. Charlotte and Ripley mess up something so Charlotte hits a big boot for two of her own. Nikki is sent outside and another big boot sends Ripley outside. A tornado DDT drops Charlotte to give Nikki two but Ripley is back in to German suplex both of them at once.

Ripley’s missile dropkick gets two on Charlotte, leaving Ripley with the stunned kickout face. Charlotte and Ripley brawl to the floor for the slugout until Nikki dives onto both of them for no reaction. Back in and Ripley and Ash go for a double suplex on Charlotte, who counters into a double DDT, then knocks them both outside (because of course she does). Charlotte corkscrew moonsaults onto both of them, with Ash being driven HARD into the barricade.

Ripley finally gets in a big boot on Charlotte and Prism Traps Nikki, only to have Charlotte break it up again. The Prism Trap to Charlotte is countered into the Figure Eight but Nikki dives off the top for the save. Nikki hits the Reckoning for two on Charlotte with Ripley making a save this time. The Riptide is countered into a DDT to send Ripley outside and this isn’t looking good for Nikki. A high crossbody misses for Nikki and Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight to get the title back at 13:03.

Rating: C+. While it’s an entertaining match, this made me mad last year and it’s doing it again here. Nikki might as well have been a lamb led to the slaughter here, as Ripley looks like a killer and Charlotte looks like a star, while Nikki looks like a mascot of a low rent kids’ birthday party place. Throw in Charlotte being booked like a train here and then getting Nikki to tap in the end and this was ALL about Charlotte, as is far too often the case anytime she’s around. Nikki being called ALMOST A Superhero was bad enough, but then she’s just a meal for Charlotte, like so many others have been over the years.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Edge. Rollins cost Edge the universal Title against Roman Reigns last month, which is apparently tied to a moment in 2014, when the Shield teased attacking Edge and almost wiped him out. Now Edge knows that if Rollins hits the Curb Stomp, his career is probably over. I’m not sure how good of a feud it was, but Edge facing someone new is a fun thing to see.

Edge vs. Seth Rollins

I almost didn’t recognize Rollins without his Freakin. Edge comes out with a hybrid Brood/Metalingus theme for a pretty awesome moment. Feeling out process to start with Edge grabbing a headlock and then knocking Rollins to the floor for some frustration. Back in and Rollins forearms away but gets backdropped right back over the top for a crash. Edge sends him back inside and then outside again but this time Rollins drives him into the post.

A trip into the steps makes it worse and Rollins grabs a neckbreaker for two back inside. Rollins hits a Sling Blade but Edge is smart enough to go to the ropes before the Stomp can launch. Yet another neckbreaker is countered though and Edge grabs a flapjack for a breather. Rollins is able to knock him off the top, setting up a heck of a frog splash for two. Another Stomp attempt is avoided so they go up top at the same time, with Edge grabbing a super swinging neckbreaker (which would seem to hurt them both equally).

It’s Edge up first with a big boot and the Edgecution for two, leaving him a bit frustrated this time. The Edge-O-Matic is good for the same but Rollins suplexes him down. Another Stomp misses so Edge grabs a Glam Slam for two (nice touch). Edge has to avoid another Stomp and sends Rollins into the post, setting up a spear through the ropes and out to the floor for the crash.

Rollins is driven into the apron and the screen (because there’s a screen) is knocked out to give Edge two more. The spear is countered into the Pedigree (how Rollins beat Roman Reigns one day) for another near fall, meaning it’s Rollins being stunned this time. With nothing on the ground working, Rollins goes up top for the Phoenix splash, only to get speared down for another near fall.

With nothing else working, Rollins just hits him in the back of the neck, setting up a basement superkick to the back of the head. Rollins goes for the Stomp yet again but gets reversed into the Edgecator of all things, with Edge letting go to switch into the Crossface. Edge rams him face first into the mat and makes it a Crossface sleeper for the tap at 21:14.

Rating: B. They beat each other up for a long time until Edge got him in the end. The story here centered around the Stomp and it was a logical way to go given the buildup from that 2014 segment. That being said, going off a segment from seven years ago that wasn’t so interesting in the first place and it was a weird build to get there. Good match, but the road there could have been better.

Money In The Bank is in a football stadium next year. Gee that’s a quick turnaround for the same stadium but I’m sure nothing will go wrong.

Tonight’s attendance of 51,326 is officially announced.

Earlier tonight, John Morrison and Miz drove a water truck into the stadium.

Here are Miz and John Morrison for a chat. They’re ready to soak everyone….but Morrison has forgotten the Drip Stick 2000s. Miz doesn’t have them either, so here is Xavier Woods with the Drip Stick 2000 (a water cannon with a water tank attached). Woods is told he’s outnumbered but he does a survey (as part of his weird NWO tribute phase) and then sprays both of them down. And that’s it, as the crowd was SILENT during this.

We recap Goldberg vs. Bobby Lashley for the WWE Title. Goldberg showed up as a challenger (as he tends to do) and the match was made, but then Lashley and MVP went after Goldberg’s son Gage (who looked like he would rather be having his teeth pulled out than be here) to make it personal. In other words, it’s a battle of the spears because WWE thinks that is the most amazing idea ever.

Raw World Title: Goldberg vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley, with MVP, is defending. After the Big Match Intros, they go with the power off to start, with Goldberg hitting a flying shoulder and a World’s Strongest Slam. Back up and Lashley knocks him down with a hard shot of his own. Neither can hit a Jackhammer though so Lashley gets in some shots to the back of the neck. For some reason Lashley goes up top but gets slammed down, meaning MVP needs to offer a distraction.

That’s fine with Goldberg, who hits the spear on the floor to rock Lashley again. With nothing else working, MVP hits Goldberg in the knee with his cane, allowing Lashley to hit a chop block. A spinebuster puts Goldberg down again and he rolls outside for a rather out of character move. Lashley follows and drives the knee into the post twice in a row….which is enough for the referee stoppage at 7:12 as Goldberg can’t stand.

Rating: D+. Yeah it wasn’t awful, but at the same tome it is really hard to find any reason to be interested in Goldberg. All he does is come in, do some lame story, and then get a title match. That wasn’t the case here, and Lashley can only do so much. Nothing to see here, but at least Goldberg is done again for the time being.

Post match Lashley stays on Goldberg with a chair, but Goldberg’s son comes in to jump Lashley. That earns him a Hurt Lock, but MVP points out who it is and Lashley lets him go. Goldberg swears vengeance and covers his son as MVP says Lashley had no way of knowing who that was. BECAUSE THIS NEEDED A REMATCH!

We recap Roman Reigns vs. John Cena for the Universal Title. Reigns has been champion for about a year so now it’s Cena coming in for the dream match. Reigns talked about how Cena never changes (Reigns: “It’s like missionary position EVERY NIGHT!”) but Cena says Reigns has to change every few years because people stop caring. Cena also brought up that all it takes is three seconds to win the title, no matter what Reigns does to him. Oh and if Reigns loses, he’s leaving WWE, because WWE likes to take away any drama they might build up.

Smackdown World Title: John Cena vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns, with Paul Heyman, is defending. Cena comes out first and my goodness you can feel the star power dripping off of him like no one else that you ever see. As a great touch, the screen behind Cena’s entrance shows his sixteen World Titles, including the dates he won them. They take their time before eventually locking up for a standoff. Cena rolls him up for two and points it out to Reigns as the mind games are on.

That doesn’t work for Reigns, who knocks him down and then does it again to make it worse. A snap suplex gives Reigns two and we hit the chinlock. Cena gets tossed outside and there’s the big whip into the steps, allowing Reigns to pose again. Reigns can even stop to pose on the steps with the title but Cena gets in a quick rollup for two (in a great touch because it’s THAT CLOSE to the upset).

A quick AA attempt is countered into a DDT to give Reigns two, allowing him to apologize to movie executives for hurting Cena. Reigns cuts off a comeback attempt with a right hand and says this is easy. Another AA attempt is countered into a sleeper, with Cena powering up to drive him into the corner. Reigns still isn’t impressed, so Cena hits that big running clothesline of his for a needed breather.

Back up and Cena hits the running shoulders into the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is countered into a quickly broken guillotine though, leaving Reigns to hit a Superman Punch to take over again. The spear is cut off with a kick to the face and now the Shuffle connects. There’s the AA for two (with Cole freaking out on commentary to give away the kickout). The STF sends Reigns to the rope for the break so Cena follows him outside, earning himself an apron kick to the face.

Reigns gets a running start but charges into an AA through the announcers’ table for two back inside, leaving Cena frustrated. Cena goes up top but dives into a powerbomb for two and needs to pull himself up in the corner. The spear misses in the corner though and it’s the super AA for two, with the Reigns Leaves If He Loses stipulation being brought up for the first time all match. For some reason Cena tries his own spear but gets kicked in the face. They slug it out with Reigns hitting the Superman Punch into a spear to retain at 23:00.

Rating: B+. This wasn’t the best match in the world, but it was all about the big match atmosphere. That was hitting completely, as Cena knows how to bring the feeling like no one else these days. While it wasn’t likely that Cena was going to win, there was the feeling that it could happen and that’s good enough. Throw in Cena knowing how to do this match just well enough and it felt like a main event worth title match between two titans.

Post match Reigns poses but here is Brock Lesnar, making his first appearance in well over a year. Lesnar circles the ring and then stands on the steps before the staredown sends Reigns backing away. While the feud is tired, this would lead to a heck of a story as Paul Heyman was stuck between the two of them and even switched sides for a few weeks. Anyway, Lesnar poses as reigns and Heyman leave to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Most of the bigger matches clicked well, but there were enough things bringing the rest of the show down. The biggest thing though was the crowd actually being around, as it adds so much to the show. This was a rare situation where Summerslam was a way bigger show than Wrestlemania and the quality was good enough too. The bad parts are pretty bad but the stronger parts of the card carried it over. Solid show, but fast forward some of those weaker points.

Ratings Comparison

Big E. vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C
Redo: C

RKBro vs. AJ Styles/Omos

Original: C+
Redo: C+

Eva Marie vs Alexa Bliss

Original: F
Redo: D-

Sheamus vs. Damian Priest

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Usos vs. Mysterios

Original: C-
Redo: C+

Becky Lynch vs. Bianca Belair

Original: N/A
Redo: N/A

Jinder Mahal vs. Drew McIntyre

Original: D+
Redo: D+

Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte vs. AJ Styles

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Seth Rollins vs. Edge

Original: B+
Redo: B

Bobby Lashley vs. Goldberg

Original: D+
Redo: D+

John Cena vs. Roman Reigns

Original: A-
Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: C+
Redo: B-

Mostly the same here, though some of the bad stuff pulled the original down a bit.

Here is the original review if you’re interested:

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Summerslam 2020
Date: August 23, 2020
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe

We’re a year removed from this show and things have indeed changed a bit. For one thing, we are FINALLY out of the Thunderdome, which was a full two days old when this aired. In something that hasn’t changed, I have no idea what happened at this show, save for the main event. That’s kind of nice for another look so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: US Title: Apollo Crews vs. MVP

Crews is defending and it’s strange to see him as just a guy in trunks and not….whatever he would become next year. As a bonus, the rest of the Hurt Business is banned from ringside. MVP takes him down into a very quickly broken knee bar but Crews is back up with a sunset flip for two. That’s enough for MVP to bail to the floor as things cool down a bit. Back in and Crews flips away from him, setting up a quick dropkick for two. MVP is fine enough to toss him over the top and out onto the steps as the beating begins.

The running boot misses in the corner so Crews goes up, only to get crotched on top. The superplex brings Crews back down but MVP lands hard and the delayed cover gets two. A clothesline puts MVP on the floor and there’s the big flip dive to take him down again. They both dive back in to beat the count and it’s time to slug it out. Crews gets the better of things and it’s a spinebuster into the standing moonsault for two. The toss powerbomb retains the title at 6:37.

Rating: C. This was about as Kickoff Showey of a match as you could get and it happened to have a title on the line. There was nothing wrong with it and Crews gets a win to make him feel that much more important as US Champion. You’re only going to get so much out of a standard Raw level match and this was about it. Not bad, but as forgettable as any other Kickoff Show match.

The opening video is much more about the Thunderdome than anything else, though the matches themselves do actually get some attention. Well the bigger ones at least. The Smackdown World Title match between the Fiend and Braun Strowman has a tagline of “You’ll Never See It Coming”. That’s one way of advertising things.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Asuka

Bayley is defending as part of the Bayley/Sasha Banks Are The Most Amazing Women Ever stretch. Granted it wound up being pretty awesome so it’s kind of hard to complain all that much. Banks (the Raw Women’s Champion and Bayley’s partner as the Women’s Tag Team Champions) is at ringside too as they fight over the grappling against the ropes to start. Asuka dropkicks her in the ribs to take over and pulls Bayley down into a reverse Koji Clutch.

The foot on the rope gets Bayley out of trouble in a hurry so she bails to the apron, allowing Asuka to kick the leg out again. There is something fun about watching Asuka pick someone apart like that and it always works. Bayley gets kicked out to the floor and Banks is already looking worried. Asuka grabs a DDT (or close enough) off the steps for two back inside but Bayley manages to snap her neck across the middle rope for a much needed breather.

Some stomping sets up the chinlock with Bayley shouting a lot as she keeps Asuka down. Back up and a quick Bayley to Belly gets two but Asuka kicks her in the head for a double knockdown. A German suplex into the hip attack gives Asuka two and they head to the apron for the slugout.

That doesn’t last long so they head back inside for an exchange of leglocks. Asuka knees her in the face for two but Bayley is right back with a running sunset flip into the corner. The “patented” (I want paperwork) top rope elbow is countered into a quickly broken cross armbreaker so Asuka is back with a kick to the head. Banks takes the running hip attack though, allowing Bayley to grab a rollup to retain at 11:33.

Rating: B-. Good and logical choice for an opener here with Asuka fighting as hard as she could to pick up the first title. That didn’t wind up working out, but they did a nice job of going back and forth against each other. What mattered here was having Asuka seem ready to pick up the win until Banks’ interference was enough to throw her off for a split second. Nice match with the story making perfect sense.

Post match Banks (who faces Asuka later tonight) and Bayley beat Asuka down and leave her laying.

Dominik Mysterio asks Rey Mysterio to let him go out there alone tonight. Rey, realizing how much of a disaster it would be to ask fans to care about Dominik on his own, says no but is finally talked into staying in the back.

Video on Retribution’s path of….well really just annoyance so far, though this period of breaking stuff would be their apex as a team.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Street Profits vs. Angel Garza/Andrade

Garza and Andrade, with Zelina Vega (who recently poisoned Montez Ford), are challenging and Kevin Owens is on commentary. We get the traditional rain of red solo cups to start as the Profits’ inset promo talks about how they are here for revenge. Andrade slugs away at Ford to start but gets caught with a big jumping clothesline. A jumping hurricanrana brings Andrade off the top and there’s the double flapjack to drop Garza.

Ford loads up the big flip dive, but gets countered into a double powerbomb onto the floor (as tends to happen). Back in and we hit the armbar on Ford, allowing Garza to TAKE OFF HIS PANTS (Vega approves). A cross armbreaker over the ropes has Ford in more trouble and it’s back to Andrade for an armbar of his own. Garza adds a running knee to the ribs (and promises to win the titles, which Owens does not like) and the running kick to the ribs makes it worse.

There’s the top rope Alberto Double Stomp for Andrade’s next near fall. Ford flips out of a belly to back suplex though and the enziguri sets up the diving tag to Dawkins. Chris Jericho’s Judas Effect only takes Dawkins off one foot (ha) and he spears Andrade down. Ford comes back in with the crazy high crossbody but Garza rolls through for two, even with Vega holding his feet on the rope. Vega gets on the apron to yell but Ford knocks Garza into her. The Sky Cash Out into the twisting frog splash retains the title at 7:50.

Rating: C. Total Raw match here which was the latest exhibit of how much charisma that Garza has. The guy can make anything look better but Andrade had the star power and that is what gets you ahead around here. This feud, or some form of it, went on for the better part of ever and never once got interesting because the Profits were that much better. Now get some fresh competition in the tag division.

The long form celebration is on.

Bayley and Sasha Banks don’t like Kayla Braxton’s questions but know that Sasha will beat Asuka tonight. Bayley even busts out a broom because it’s going to be a sweep.

We recap Sonya Deville vs. Mandy Rose, which has been going on for a long time. Sonya got jealous of Mandy getting all of the attention and eventually turned on her by calling her selfish. Since it’s WWE, we’re supposed to side with the bombshell model, which was made even worse when Sonya was about five levels ahead of Mandy on the mic. Sonya cut off some of Mandy’s hair so the hair vs. hair match was set.

Then a psychotic fan broke into Deville’s house with zip ties and a knife, likely in an attempt to kidnap and/or kill Deville. Rose happened to be staying there and the two got away as the stalker went into the wrong part of the house. This sent Deville into a lengthy legal process and since her lawyer felt that cutting her hair off was a bad idea, it was turned into a No DQ Loser Leaves WWE match. Fair enough, but next time you have a crazed stalker who might be trying to kill you, make sure you think of kayfabe. Go out separate doors or something and worry about being stabbed later.

Sonya Deville vs. Mandy Rose

No DQ and the loser leaves WWE. Mandy offers a handshake to start so Deville rolls her up for two. Back up and Mandy hits her in the face and they head outside with Deville getting suplexed onto the ramp. A clothesline off the announcers’ table puts Deville down again and let’s get a table. As usual, that takes way too long and it’s Sonya ramming Mandy into the announcers’ table to take over.

Back in and a running knee to the chest gets two and it’s a dragon sleeper with a bodyscissors to put Mandy in even more trouble. The trash talking fires Mandy back up though and it’s a jumping knee for two on Sonya. It’s back outside for more ramming into the announcers’ table before Mandy slides chairs over the regular table, with Sonya having to duck the decapitation attempts. That’s either brilliant or really stupid and I’m not sure which. Back in and three straight running knees set up Angel’s Wings to crush Sonya. Another running knee gives Mandy the pin at 9:49.

Rating: C-. This had the intensity but dang Mandy is not the greatest in the ring. I completely get why WWE would want to push the heck out of here but Sonya was so much more of a complete package and felt like a natural. It’s a shame that she had to go away, though it was a rare instance where something is more important than wrestling (egads that’s hard to say).

Post match Otis comes out to celebrate with Mandy (Yeah remember when that was a thing?), who fails at the Caterpillar.

Here’s what’s coming on the WWE Network!

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Dominik Mysterio. This was part of the never ending Rollins vs. Mysterios feud, which saw Rollins gouge Rey Mysterio’s eye out. Dominik is willing to fight for his father in a street fight, which also happens to be his in-ring debut. Rollins also destroyed Dominik by tying him into the ropes and destroying him with a kendo stick for a pretty nasty moment. Other than that though, this feud was complete death by this point and this was the match that I was dreading coming into the show.

Seth Rollins vs. Dominik Mysterio

Street fight and Rollins, with Murphy, is in gear inspired by Rey Mysterio at Halloween Havoc 1997. Rey is here with Dominik, as you might expect. Rollins wrestles him down without much trouble to start and seems rather comfortable. He’s so comfortable that he offers Dominik a headlock before tripping him down with ease. Dominik gets in a few right hands before getting dropped again. A springboard armdrag and then some regular versions have Rollins down, which is just a step too far.

Rollins drops him again and gets a kendo stick, which is dropkicked out of his hands. Dominik gives chase but gets knocked down, only to have Rollins kick the stick away. The one armed camel clutch has Dominik in more trouble and Rey is nervous. The Sling Blade lets Rollins work on Dominik’s hand and Murphy sends in a chair. Seth yells at Rey a lot as he stomps away but the Stomp (that’s confusing) is countered into a drop toehold into the chair. The Buckle Bomb is countered into a hurricanrana into the corner to stagger Rollins again as this comeback needs a crowd reaction.

A tornado DDT out of the corner gets two and the kendo stick shots have Rollins in more trouble. Dominik goes up but it’s Rollins running the corner for the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two. Rollins is mad (as he should be) and it’s time to kendo stick Dominik for a change. Murphy throws in a table but Rollins takes too long going up, allowing Dominik to hit a super White Russian legsweep through the table. Since wrestling logic is a thing, Dominik is fine and hits a frog splash for two.

Dominik takes too long grabbing things again, allowing Rollins to superkick and kendo stick him some more. Saxton: “Rey can do nothing to help his son!” As you try to see the invisible wall keeping Rey from doing anything, Rollins pulls out some handcuffs. Cue Rey’s wife Angie to try and do something but Rey holds her back.

Murphy loads up the steps to take out Dominik’s eye, meaning the invisible wall is smashed as Rey finally gets involved (making the last five or so minutes subject to wrestling logic). With Dominik as backup, Rey is quickly cuffed to the ropes as the villains look up at Angie. Dominik is back up to make the save this time….and his frog splash hits knees, because he isn’t very good at this. Rollins tells Rey to reach for Dominik and then hits the Stomp for the pin at 22:36.

Rating: C-. Being away from this story for a year has taken away some of the bad feelings about it, but this still wasn’t very good. Above all else, this was WAY too long as Rollins felt like he was dealing with an annoyance than any real threat. Dominik isn’t an embarrassment in the ring by any means but he also isn’t ready to be in a 20+ minute featured match at Summerslam. He looked ok for a debut, but the length of the match (and the feud) dragged it way down.

The villains sneer post match and Rey hugs Dominik.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Asuka

Banks is defending and has Bayley in her corner. Commentary points out that Banks has never had a successful singles title defense, which does not bode well for her future. Banks goes straight for the knee (ala Bayley in the first match) but Asuka spins up and fires off the Kawada kicks. A sliding forearm (minus some power because of the knee) sends Banks outside and Asuka is right there with a kneebar on the floor.

They wind up on the apron, where Asuka kicks the post by mistake. Bayley cranks up the trash talk (because she’s very good at that) and Banks takes her back inside to fire off kicks in the corner. Banks switches to the shoulders but gets caught in an electric chair faceplant. Asuka can’t be trusted with two legs in front of her and Banks has to bail to the ropes to escape the kneebar.

With that broken up, Asuka gets a bit creative by taking her up top for a super DDT. The missile dropkick gives Asuka two but Banks goes after the knee again, setting up the double knees in the corner. They’re both down so Bayley goes into coaching mode….and Asuka immediately grabs the ankle lock. Bayley isn’t good at coaching. The Bank Statement is countered into the Asuka Lock which is countered as well. Bayley’s distraction fails and the Asuka Lock goes on again to make Banks tap for the title at 11:31.

Rating: B-. I liked this one a good bit as Banks and Bayley had a plan to take Asuka out but still couldn’t do it. That’s a nice way to make Asuka look even more impressive while also continuing the build to Banks vs. Bayley. They took their time to get there but Bayley was awesome almost every step of the way. Banks held up her end as well and it was a heck of a match on top of the storytelling.

Post match Banks glares at Bayley, who begs forgiveness.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Drew McIntyre for the Raw World Title. Orton has attacked a variety of legends, which has McIntyre ready to fight back and defend their honor, along with his title. McIntyre talked about how Orton has been protected for years while McIntyre fought every day to get here. They did a nice job with the culture clash here and the video does a good job of making this feel big.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Drew McIntyre

McIntyre is defending and we get a quick inset promo from Shawn Michaels, who wants Orton to get Claymored. Orton bails to the floor to start as the mind games are going strong early on. Back in and Orton begs off again but does hit a few right hands before bailing to the floor for a second time. This time the chase is on but Orton catches McIntyre on the way back in. The RKO attempt is blocked so McIntyre shoulders him down. Another threat of the RKO sends McIntyre bailing outside and you can see a bit of shock.

Back in again and McIntyre unloads in the corner but has to block the RKO for a third time. The ensuing charge sends McIntyre shoulder first into the post and Orton sends him into the barricade to make it worse. A posting sets up a drop onto the announcers’ table and then Orton does the latter again. Orton gets a bit creative by suplexing McIntyre off the table for a delayed one (that kickout at one was a good deal for McIntyre).

The chinlock goes on for a bit, followed by the Orton Stomp and some slow staring at the….uh, screens. McIntyre comes back with a Stunner to the knee in the corner and a spinebuster for the double knockdown. With the knee banged up, McIntyre goes Flair with the Figure Four (nice job given Orton attacking Flair and other legends leading up to this). Orton can’t roll out so he grabs the referee for a distraction and goes to the eye to escape. McIntyre’s eye looks to be cut a bit as they slug it out from their knees. Make that from their feet, with McIntyre having to block the RKO again.

The overhead belly to belly sends Orton flying and McIntyre does it again for a bonus. A top rope shot to the head drops Orton and McIntyre nips up as the adrenaline starts flowing. McIntyre loads up a superplex, gets knocked into the Tree of Woe, and pulls himself up to send Orton flying with the choke superplex as usual. As impressive as that is, commentary shouldn’t be that impressed or surprised, but WWE commentators are seen as stupid for a reason.

The Futureshock gets two but McIntyre misses coming off the top. Orton’s powerslam gets two and he is busted open as well. The hanging DDT is broken up and it’s a Cactus Clothesline to put both of them on the floor. They get back in fast but this time the hanging DDT connects. With nothing else working, Orton loads up the Punt but McIntyre cuts him off. The Claymore misses so Orton tries the RKO again, only to get caught in a backslide of all things to retain the title at 20:34. Commentary shouts about how Orton NEVER SAW IT COMING because they need to hit that tagline.

Rating: B. I liked this one a good bit as they were playing up the story they had established coming in. The idea was that Orton was the seasoned veteran who had learned from the legends and he was cheating every chance he had here. Throw in the RKO as the ultimate weapon (which he never hit, as it is probably being saved for later) and this was a chess match with McIntyre using everything he could while Orton just waited to hit the RKO. I liked what they were doing and the ending worked well. Good match, which shouldn’t be much of a surprise.

Orton looks up at McIntyre from the floor because this isn’t over.

We recap Braun Strowman vs. Bray Wyatt for the Smackdown World Title. These two have been feuding for MONTHS in one bad match after another. Last month, they fought in the swamp (because reasons) and Wyatt made Alexa Bliss appear because Strowman has always wanted her. Strowman doesn’t buy it because he knows the Fiend is going to corrupt her as well. Bliss slapped Strowman a bunch so he teased attacking her but decided to fight the Fiend instead. In other words, this feud was really, really stupid and nothing they were changing made it any better at all.

Smackdown World Title: The Fiend vs. Braun Strowman

Strowman is defending and this is Falls Count Anywhere. Fiend is driven back into the corner to start but comes back with a heck of a clothesline to drop Strowman. They’re already on the floor with Fiend busting out a toolbox. A few shots with said toolbox don’t do much to Strowman, who runs Fiend through the barricade. Strowman chokeslams him onto (not through) the announcers’ table and a steps shot to the face drops Fiend again.

Back in and the powerslam sends Fiend right back to the floor, which doesn’t mean as much as he can get pinned out there as well. Strowman kicks him up the ramp and they fight backstage. Fiend whips him into a few walls and Sister Abigail gets two. They come back into the arena where Strowman is sent into the video screen to bust up some of the color.

The Mandible Claw goes on but Strowman gets up anyway and shoves him into the apron for the break. Back in and another powerslam gets another two on Fiend so Strowman yells a lot. Strowman grabs a box cutter from the toolbox and starts cutting up the mat to expose the wood. That takes WAY too long so Fiend is back up with a Rock Bottom and a pair of Sister Abigails onto the wood for the pin and the titles at 11:58.

Rating: C. The shorter time helped but egads this feud was death and everyone but WWE seemed to know it. You could have seen this title change coming from before Extreme Rules last month, making for a very long and slow build. They kept this the way they should have and the lack of anything involving Bliss helped here. It could have been worse, but you’re only getting so much out of a hoss fight like this one. As long as Strowman isn’t champion any longer though, it’s an upgrade.

Post match Roman Reigns is back (for the first time since March) with the spear to the Fiend and the beating is on. Another spear hits Strowman and Reigns shouts about how they aren’t monsters unless he’s here. Reigns bends a chair over Strowman and spears Fiend down again. He grabs the title, says it has always been his, and calls Fiend a freak in a mask. Cole: “WE NEVER SAW THIS COMING!” Reigns would win the title a week later, as he should have, along with joining Paul Heyman, which was an amazing twist.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a bit of an odd show as the stuff that was good was quite good but the weaker stuff just felt tacked on. WWE was still figuring things out after getting into the Thunderdome and this came off as somewhat of a Summerslam in name only. It certainly isn’t a bad show with the Bayley/Banks/Asuka stuff and McIntyre vs. Orton all being good. Tighten things up a bit and it could be great, but for now it just has to settle for being pretty good.

Ratings Comparison

Apollo Crews vs. MVP

Original: C
Redo: C

Asuka vs. Bayley

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Street Profits vs. Andrade/Angel Garza

Original: C
Redo: C

Sonya Deville vs. Mandy Rose

Original: D+
Redo: C

Seth Rollins vs. Dominik Mysterio

Original: D+
Redo: C-

Asuka vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B
Redo: B-

Randy Orton vs. Drew McIntyre

Original: B+
Redo: B

Fiend vs. Braun Strowman

Original: C+
Redo: C

Overall Rating

Original: C
Redo: B-

I’m not sure if that overall rating makes sense but the rest of the show was certainly in the same ballpark, save for Rose vs. Deville.

Here is the original review if you are interested:

 

 

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Summerslam 2019
Date: August 11, 2019
Location: Scotiabank Arena, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 16,904
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

I know I say something like this every year but it never ceases to amaze me how little I can remember about a show from the previous year. I can remember midcard matches from thirty years ago but the main event of this show? It took me a little while to come up with it and that’s not good. How can these things be that unmemorable? Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Oney Lorcan vs. Drew Gulak

Gulak is defending and thank goodness there are fans in the building for the Kickoff Show. Drew hits a shotgun dropkick to start but Lorcan shoves him away. We hit the lockup and then go to the mat with Gulak gaining mat control. Back up and Gulak slams him hard into the corner and we take a break. We come back with Gulak riding him into a chinlock until Lorcan fights up again. Some uppercuts set up the running Blockbuster for two on Gulak.

They head outside with Gulak being sent into various things, only to come back with the Gulock back inside. Lorcan makes the rope so it’s a double clothesline to put them both down again. Back up and Gulak actually wins a slugout, setting up the Gulock. That’s flipped over into a cradle for two but the half and half is broken up. Lorcan does the Ultimate Warrior pose and pulls Gulak back in, which brings the ring skirt in with him. The distraction lets Gulak hit him in the throat, setting up the Cyclone Crash to retain the title at 8:49.

Rating: C. They beat the heck out of each other in some short bursts here and that is one of the better ways to open things up. Lorcan is always good for a spot like this and I dug Gulak’s singles run. It wasn’t an epic showdown or anything but it got the show off on a nice enough foot, which is the point of this division.

Kickoff Show: Buddy Murphy vs. Apollo Crews

This is during the time when Murphy could barely get on television and was still the Best Kept Secret. A quick knee gets two on Crews and Murphy stomps away in the corner. The chinlock doesn’t last long and they get up for an exchange of crossbodies. It’s Crews up first with a kick to the head and a jumping clothesline. The Angle Slam is escaped but Crews hits a Samoan drop into a standing moonsault for two.

Crews gets caught in the corner though and a running powerbomb gives Murphy his own two. Murphy hits another knee but Crews reverses Murphy’s Law into a cradle for another near fall. A backdrop sends Murphy to the floor, where he sends Crews into the steps. The big no hands flip dive drops Crews again….and here’s Erick Rowan to jump Murphy for the DQ (part of the Who Attacked Roman Reigns story) at 4:39.

Rating: C. It was an action packed match but they didn’t have much time before they got to the storyline ending. This is another case where it’s amazing how fast this stuff goes in one side of my head and out the other as I barely remember any of this aside from Murphy being taken out of the story so fast. I could have gone with more from these two, but it wasn’t going to matter with the big story going on.

Post match Rowan destroys Murphy even more, including a powerbomb against the post.

Here’s Elias for a song about Toronto. They think they are the center of the universe but they can’t win the Stanley Cup and no one goes to the Blue Jays game. Oh and the Toronto Raptors’ best player left town….and here’s Edge to interrupt. Edge gets the big hometown pop and then hits a very surprising spear, marking Edge’s first physical contact in over eight years. Then he never did anything physical again ever. Apparently he was medically cleared here but WWE was waiting on the big moment at the Rumble. Fair enough.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Tag Team Titles: Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross vs. IIconics

Bliss and Cross are defending after winning the titles earlier in the week on Raw. Bliss has the Buzz Lightyear gear on and that’s a rather good choice. Kay on the other hand is Maleficent, sending Graves into a rant about how this isn’t Disney. Graves talks about the IIconics being locked in a hotel and laying in bed together for 24 hours to meld their energies but since Jerry Lawler isn’t on commentary, no one bites. Kay and Bliss trade headlocks to start until Bliss threatens her with the laser on her arm. That sends Graves through the roof again, to the point where he threatens to turn in his Bliss fan card.

It’s off to Cross as the Toy Story references come in fast. Peyton rolls Cross up for two but a blind tag lets Kay come back in to get in a cheap shot. A double kick to the back keeps Cross down and we hit the chinlock. Kay gets two off a gutwrench suplex but Cross faceplants Peyton and the hot tag brings in Bliss to clean house. Corey: “I was expecting Moana to come save the day.” Everything breaks down and Peyton hits something like a Widow’s Peak for two on Bliss. The kickout sends her into hysterics so Bliss punches Peyton down and nails Twisted Bliss to retain at 6:11.

Rating: D+. These titles continue to mean a grand total of nothing and are little more than a way to get the IIconics out there to annoy the fans while Bliss works on her cosplay skills. There isn’t enough of a division to hold them up at the moment and it becomes more and more obvious every time they’re defended. As in probably every month and a half or so.

The opening video talks about how we have arrived. You don’t get chances like these very often, so when you do, seize the moment. Tonight, we are Summerslam.

We recap Becky Lynch vs. Natalya in a submission match for the Raw Women’s Title. Natalya won a four way to get the title shot in her home country, because WWE still thinks that Natalya makes for an interesting challenger.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Natalya

Natalya is challenging in a submission match. The fans certainly seem to like both of them, though that might be due to Natalya coming out carrying a Canadian flag. They stare each other down and trade slaps to start so Becky drives her into the corner. That earns her a discus lariat but Becky is right back up to slug away again. The Bexploder sends Natalya down but the cross armbreaker is blocked. Becky grabs a triangle instead so Natalya tries a powerbomb.

That doesn’t break it up so Natalya lifts her up, only to get hurricanranaed down. Becky cranks on the legs near the apron and they fall to the floor with Natalya sending her into the barricade. Back in and Natalya suplexes her into the ropes to bang up the knee. The fans are behind Becky as she fires off knees but Natalya wraps the knee across the rope. The Sharpshooter goes on in the corner, which doesn’t seem like it would be as effective since there is almost no torque on Becky’s back and therefore the knees.

That’s broken up in a hurry and they fall outside with Natalya being sent into the announcers’ table. Now it’s a LET’S GO BECKY/NATTIE SUCKS chant as Natalya hits a superplex back inside for a double knockdown. It’s Natalya up first but the basement dropkick is countered into Becky’s version of the Sharpshooter. Natalya crawls over to the corner and rolls Becky into it for the escape and they’re both down.

Becky misses a kick out of the corner though and Natalya grabs the Disarm-Her for a change. That’s reverses and Becky tries the Sharpshooter but Natalya reverses into one of her own in the middle of the ring. Becky crawls to the rope for the break and this time pulls Natalya into the Disarm-Her to retain at 12:24.

Rating: B-. It was a good back and forth match but more importantly, now we can stop acting like Natalya is anything more than a good hand who gets the occasional title shot. Even her home country fans weren’t caring about her because they see what she is: talented in the ring but boring everywhere else. She’s been around forever and seeing her in these spots over and over again just makes me groan most of the time. I can’t believe I’m alone in that sentiment either. Also, like Becky was losing to anyone just four months after Wrestlemania. Well except to Charlotte of course.

Trish Stratus is ready to show Charlotte that legends are better than modern wrestlers because Charlotte couldn’t walk a mile in her boots.

We recap Goldberg vs. Dolph Ziggler. Dolph had been set up for a match against Miz but insulted Shawn Michaels and Goldberg on the way there. This set up a match against a legend instead, with Ziggler expecting Michaels but getting Goldberg. Just keep it short.

Goldberg vs. Dolph Ziggler

Before the match, Ziggler says he’s the best thing that could happen to this show because he gets rid of legends. Goldberg might not even be here tonight….and there’s the music. We get the full entrance and the pyro is rather strong as usual. The bell rings and they stare each other down, with Ziggler hitting a superkick for an early one. Another superkick gets another one but Goldberg hits a heck of a spear. The Jackhammer finishes Ziggler at 1:46. That’s how it should have been and Ziggler sold that spear as well as anyone in a good while.

Post match Ziggler says Goldberg hits like a baby and wants Goldberg to do it again. Goldberg is fine with coming back and hitting another spear. For some reason Ziggler grabs the mic and says anyone can get lucky twice. Goldberg is a joke in wrestling…and there’s another spear to put him down again.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Ricochet for the US Title. Ricochet didn’t think much of AJ treating him like an afterthought and then beat AJ to retain the title. Then Styles beat him up and took the title in their second title match with some help from Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows. Now it’s the trilogy match.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Ricochet

Styles is defending and has Gallows and Anderson in his corner. Ricochet is in the full body suit here, which is always a weird visual. AJ goes right for him to start but gets knocked outside, with Ricochet using Anderson and Gallows as stepping stones to grab a hurricanrana on Styles. Back in and AJ stomps him down in the corner before switching to the leg in a smart move. Some elbows to the knee have Ricochet down and the knee is bent around the middle rope.

Ricochet manages to get in a kick to the face and another one to the head out of the corner. A one legged springboard clothesline (nice touch) gets two on AJ and a jumping neckbreaker into the running shooting star is good for the same. AJ is smart enough to kick the knee out again and Ricochet is sent outside. The fans are split but the dueling chants are cut off by AJ hitting a baseball slide.

Back in and AJ’s fireman’s carry backbreaker gets two more but Ricochet hits another kick to the head for another two. They’re both down with Ricochet slapping the leg, which would seem to hurt it even more but it’s wrestling logic. Since AJ knows his logic as well, we hit the Calf Crusher but Ricochet slams AJ’s head into the mat and slaps on an Anaconda Vice of all things.

With that broken up, Ricochet muscles him up with a suplex for two more and can’t believe AJ kicks out. How deadly does he think his suplex is? Ricochet takes out a distracting Gallows but the delay lets AJ crotch him on top. AJ gets knocked back though and Ricochet tries something like a Whisper in the Wind, only to have AJ pull him out of the air and into the Styles Clash to retain at 12:54. That looked awesome.

Rating: B. These two work well together and that’s all you need in this situation. Let them go out there and do their thing, with Ricochet looking great and AJ getting to show why he’s as great as everyone thinks he is. This was pretty much it for Ricochet as a singles challenger though, which has been the case ever since. I’m not sure what more you could want from Ricochet (just don’t let him talk) but hey, it’s not like WWE needs new stars with insane athletic ability, experience and charisma right?

Post match Anderson and Gallows give Ricochet the Magic Killer.

The Street Profits, still waiting to wrestle on Raw, hype up the show so far and everything else that they have coming up tonight. Dawkins hits on Nikki Cross but Ric Flair shows up to…well to be Ric Flair.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Ember Moon

Moon is challenging and it’s almost weird to see old school Bayley these days. Bayley armdrags her down to start so an annoyed Moon sweeps the leg. A headlock doesn’t work for Bayley as Ember sends her into the corner for the front flip clothesline. Moon splashes her for two and it’s off to a bow and arrow. Back up and Moon misses a crossbody, allowing Bayley to hit the sliding lariat.

Bayley hangs her over the top and grabs a suplex for two more, setting up the stomping in the corner. The fans sing to Bayley, who pulls her shoulder first into the rope. Moon gets tied in the Tree of Woe for the springboard elbow and we hit the inverted Boston crab. That’s broken up and Moon nips up for a headscissors (nice) to send Bayley outside.

Back in and a super hurricanrana sets up a twisting Dominator into some knees to the face (nice as well) for the next near fall. Bayley gets in a kick to the face and goes up, but Moon pulls her into a spinning powerbomb (Moon has a lot of nice stuff). Moon goes up top but Bayley is right there to pull her down with a super Bayley to Belly for the pin at 10:03.

Rating: B-. This is a weird one as Moon had some sweet stuff in there but just got pinned almost out of nowhere in the end. I know a lot of people don’t like the new Bayley and I get that, but watching her back, you can see how much she has grown with the heel turn and the new character. At this point, she was just kind of a person with a reputation and not much else. Good enough match, but Moon wouldn’t be around much longer due to her ankle injury and Bayley would turn heel in less than a month so none of this meant anything long term.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Kevin Owens. Shane went on a power/ego trip that the Attitude Era would think was a bit much and Owens was sick of him. This somehow meant EVEN MORE SHANE, who probably should have been #1 contender to the Smackdown World Title at this point. Anyway, Owens is gone if Shane wins and that is a rather popular idea.

Shane McMahon vs. Kevin Owens

The fans chant for Owens, but hang on though as Shane heads outside and says he has a guest outside referee: his personal goon Elias. Shane drops to the floor to start and Owens yells at Elias, with Shane sliding back in to try for the countout. That doesn’t work so the chase is on until Elias trips Owens. Back in and Owens hammers away in the corner, setting up the Cannonball.

A clothesline sends Shane outside for the third time but another Elias distraction lets Shane send Owens into the barricade. Back in and the Russian legsweep gets two on Owens and we hit the YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants. A DDT gets two more and let’s hit that Hart reference with the Sharpshooter attempt. That’s broken up and Owens hit the Pop Up sitout powerbomb but Elias grabs the referee.

Owens picks up a chair and Shane offers a free shot but Owens goes with a superkick instead. There’s the Swanton into a frog splash for two, with Elias pulling the referee out again. The Owens cannonball hits both referees and that means he can grab the chair. Elias breaks that up so Owens chairs him over and over, leaving Owens to go after Shane again. The referee gets up and takes the chair away, so it’s a low blow into the Stunner to finish Shane at 9:19.

Rating: D+. Yeah what else were you expecting here? That being said, it was probably an easier sit this time around without having to watch all of the build to get to this match. Shane was a nightmare around this time and thankfully would be gone on the first Smackdown on Fox. At least Owens won here as someone had to finally beat Shane, who was completely ridiculous for the better part of a year at this point.

We recap Roman Reigns being attacked by a mystery man. Samoa Joe was accused of being the attacker but Buddy Murphy said it was Erick Rowan. Therefore, we flash back to the Kickoff Show with Rowan attacking Murphy.

Charlotte vs. Trish Stratus

Charlotte is the best of today and Trish may be the best ever, dream match ensues. They stare each other down (or up in Trish’s case) before going to the lockup against the ropes. The fans sing O Canada as it’s a standoff until Trish hits a quick Thesz non-press. Charlotte is right back with a Figure Four attempt but Trish flips her away with the headscissors. That lets Trish pose and soak in the YOU STILL GOT IT chants, followed by more circling.

This time it’s Charlotte being sent outside and Trish hits a Thesz press into the right hands off the apron. The posing is on but Charlotte isn’t ready to head back inside just yet. Instead she sends Trish hard into the barricade as they’re setting things up well so far. Back in and Trish is slammed face first into the mat a few times, setting up the double arm crank with a knee between the shoulders.

Charlotte nips up and mocks Trish’s point before bending the neck around the middle rope. Trish reverses a belly to back suplex into a crossbody for two, earning herself a knee to the neck. Some trash talk in the corner bring Trish back up so she double legs Charlotte for some right hands. That just earns her a big boot to the floor as Trish can’t get anything going here. Back in and Charlotte stomps her down but, say it with me, the moonsault misses.

Trish gets in a slap and starts the chops, including a WOO for a bonus. The Stratusphere is blocked but Trish pulls herself up and starts slapping away, setting up a super hurricanrana for two with the fans getting right back into things. The Chick Kick misses as well and Charlotte boots her in the face for her own two. It’s back to the leg but the Figure Four is countered into a small package to give Trish two more.

Trish gets her own Figure Four into the Figure Eight (Corey: “THIS IS NOT FAIR TO FLAIR!” You knew he was getting that in somewhere) but Charlotte escapes again. Charlotte’s spear only hits buckle and the Stratusfaction connects for two more. They go head to head from their knees and slug it out until the Chick Kick gives Trish the next near fall. Another Chick Kick is countered with the big boot and the Figure Eight makes Trish tap at 16:37.

Rating: B+. Match of the night by a long stretch and the storytelling was working hard here. Charlotte being overconfident made sense as she never believes anyone is in her league and it’s not like Trish surviving here and getting back into things is a stretch. I had more fun with this the second time around and it’s a heck of a match with Trish showing she could easily hang at this level. Her generation gets a lot of (often deserved) flack but she was that good and deserves all kinds of praise for being an actual trailblazer.

Post match Charlotte leaves and Trish gets the big hero’s moment with the posing.

Bret Hart wishes Seth Rollins luck.

We recap Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton. They brought up the infamous Madison Square Garden moment, which Orton claims for driving Kofi to where he is now. However, that wasn’t enough to make him better than Orton and now Orton wants the title. He even takes credit for the Wrestlemania moment and now Kofi is ready to prove that he got himself here.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton

Kofi is defending on his own and his kids are in the front row (cue your Scooby Roo ruh roh sound effect). Orton taunts him with a pancake to start so a fired up Kofi drives him into the corner to start. That gives us dueling KOFI’S STUPID/RANDY SUCKS chants and Kofi runs the corner for a spinning shot to the head to….oddly quiet the fans down. Weird Canadians. Kofi hammers away in the corner until a poke to the eye cuts him off again. A big shove sends Kofi off the top and down into the barricade for your first big crash.

Orton drops him onto the announcers’ table and the dueling chants are back. Back in and Orton bends Kofi’s back around the middle rope, followed by an uppercut to the floor. Kofi jumps over the steps though and hits a shot to the head. The crossbody off the apron misses though and Orton drops him onto the announcers’ table again. Back in again and Orton seems to approve of the dueling chants. The superplex is broken up though and Kofi hits a top rope DDT for two.

The chops have Orton rocked but he comes back with the backbreaker for two more. Kofi backdrops his way out of the hanging DDT though and mostly nails the Trust Fall. Back in and Orton catches him on the apron with the hanging DDT. The RKO is countered though and Kofi goes up, only to dive right into the RKO. For some reason Orton doesn’t cover though and Kofi rolls outside. Orton follows and yells at Kofi’s kids, which sends Kofi into a frenzy for….I guess a very fast double countout at 16:28.

Rating: C+. They were working well together and Kofi was starting to make Orton sweat at the end, but then they did the ending that was designed to do nothing more than set up a rematch at Clash Of Champions. That’s such a big problem with WWE today. Outside of Wrestlemania, everything is built around the idea of setting up a match at whatever show, leaving this show to feel unimportant. You’re already at Summerslam. How much of a bigger stage can you have for the rematch?

Post match the fans call BULLS*** and don’t seem interested as Kofi unloads with a kendo stick. Trouble In Paradise gets even less of a reaction.

We recap the Fiend vs. Finn Balor. Bray Wyatt had returned just after Wrestlemania with the Firefly Fun House, where he eventually started hinting at some kind of monster called the Fiend. Finn Balor became his first target and Balor said bring it on. The Fiend has attacked a few times before but this is his in-ring debut.

Finn Balor vs. The Fiend

Balor is all in white for the hero’s entrance but Fiend blows him away, with the debut of the severed head lantern and the upgraded theme music. Balor looks rightfully terrified and we’re ready to go. They even have the full lights on instead of going red for a nice relief. Fiend headbutts him down to start and wildly stomps away as the YOWIE WOWIE chants start up.

Balor manages a whip into the corner but Fiend leans back to scare him off. A clothesline to the back of the head sets up a release Rock Bottom and Fiend glares at him a lot. Sister Abigail is countered and Balor hits a Sling Blade into the jumping double stomp to the chest. The shotgun dropkick sets up the Coup de Grace but Fiend moves and grabs the mandible claw for the pin at 3:30.

Rating: C-. This is a hard one to grade as the match itself was far from the point. They were going with the idea of introducing the Fiend and making him out to be the new scary monster. That was accomplished in spades as Balor was completely destroyed and wound up heading back to NXT. Good stuff here, even if the match was barely anything to see.

Post match the lights go out again and Fiend appears on the stage. Balor’s eyes bug out as he isn’t sure what happened to him.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar. Seth beat him for the Universal Title at Wrestlemania but Brock cashed in Money in the Bank at Extreme Rules. Therefore, a now injured Seth, has to do it all over again. So yes, that’s really their best idea for the main event of Summerslam: just do Wrestlemania again.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is challenging and has injured ribs. After the Big Match Intros, Brock hits him in the ribs and drives shoulders in the corner. More shoulders have Paul Heyman rather pleased but Rollins flips out of a German suplex and hits a quick Stomp for two. The fans are properly woken up now and Brock bails to the floor, with Rollins hitting a running knee off the apron.

Back in and a pair of superkicks look to set up the Stomp but Rollins counters into the F5. Lesnar can’t follow up so he throws Rollins around by the rib tape. It’s time for the German suplexes to send Rollins outside, with Lesnar adding another suplex on the floor. Rollins slips out of an F5 though and posts Lesnar a few times, setting up the springboard knee to the head.

Lesnar is right back up with another German suplex though and they’re both down again. The dueling chants start again and Brock takes off the gloves. We hit the waistlock to stay on the ribs for a bit until Brock’s charge hits the post. Seth hits two suicide dives but the third one is countered with a hard ram into the post for another double knockdown.

The announcers’ table is loaded up but Seth superkicks Brock onto it instead, setting up the super frog splash from the top of the post. Another frog splash connects back inside and the Stomp gets two. The next Stomp is countered into a failed F5 attempt so Rollins superkicks him into another Stomp for the pin and the title at 13:21.

Rating: B. And then Lesnar went away forever, never to go after the World Title again. Or he won it again in about two and a half months because that’s what always happens. Anyway, this was another solid match between the two of them and it was a lot more engaging because it actually got some time. Lesnar’s spamming finishers matches get old in a hurry because he does them so often. Mix it up a bit with something like this between some talented people and it makes that big of a difference. It doesn’t have the impact because we saw it four months earlier, but at least it was good.

The celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. This is a pretty strong show with nothing terribly bad (Shane’s match is the weakest and even that involves seeing him get beaten up) and some solid performances in the big matches. It’s also a pretty short show with the main card clocking in at less than three and a half hours. They didn’t stretch this out further than they needed to and it felt like a big show. Good stuff here and worth a look if you have the time.

Ratings Comparison

Drew Gulak vs. Oney Lorcan

Original: C+

Redo: C

Apollo Crews vs. Buddy Murphy

Original: C-

Redo: C

IIconics vs. Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Becky Lynch vs. Natalya

Original: B

Redo: B-

Goldberg vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

AJ Styles vs. Ricochet

Original: B

Redo: B

Ember Moon vs. Bayley

Original: D+

Redo: B-

Kevin Owens vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Trish Stratus vs. Charlotte

Original: B

Redo: B+

Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston

Original: B-

Redo: C+

The Fiend vs. Finn Balor

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B-

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: B

Oh come on it was better than that.

Here is the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/11/summerslam-2019-the-summertime-purples/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Summerslam 2018
Date: August 19, 2018
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 16,169
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Jonathan Coachman

This time for sure, Summerslam edition! Yes believe it or not the main event is once again Roman Reigns challenging Brock Lesnar for the Universal Title because that hasn’t gotten old this year. Other than that….as usual I can barely remember anything on these shows as they run together so much. Let’s get to it.

Oh and due to the recent WWE Network update, I get to watch the Kickoff Show on YouTube. Well done with that one people.

Kickoff Show: Andrade Cien Almas/Zelina Vega vs. Lana/Rusev

Rusev is on fire at this point and it’s a battle of the wrestling pairs. Andrade gets Rusev to chase him and it’s right into the double Tranquilo pose. Rusev and Lana shout at them but Andrade gets in a cheap shot to break up the chase. That’s fine with Rusev, who stomps him down in the corner until Zelina offers a distraction. Andrade posts him like a good rudo, setting up the armbreaker over the ropes. An armbar takes us to a break and we come back with Vega pulling Lana off the apron to prevent the tag.

The reverse tornado DDT gives Andrade two and the armbar goes on again. Another reverse tornado DDT is countered with a forearm (keeping it simple can work) though and it’s the hot tag to Lana. A bulldog lets Lana dance up and the neckbreaker gets two. Vega sends her face first into the buckle but Lana breaks up the running knees with a kick to the head. Andrade makes sure the Accolade doesn’t go on with a well timed distraction though and Vega grabs a rollup with her feet…..as close to the ropes as she can get them for the pin at 7:02. That was pretty adorable with Vega trying to get there and not reaching.

Rating: D+. What happened with Rusev and Lana? I know I ask that a lot but egads man. They’re married in real life, Rusev has more charisma than he knows what to do with and Lana is the walking definition of a blonde bombshell who can talk. A year later they’ve basically disappeared and I would love to know why. At least Andrade is getting a push, and with as much talent as he has, there is no reason for him not to. The fans are properly fired up now so well done on the job, even if the match wasn’t great.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Drew Gulak vs. Cedric Alexander

Cedric is defending in the first of NINE title matches because WWE has too many times and doesn’t get why that is such a problem. Gulak’s friends Brian Kendrick and Jack Gallagher are barred from ringside. Feeling out process to start with Cedric taking him into the corner but having his headscissors blocked. The Gulock is broken up in a hurry and Cedric hits a dropkick to take things outside.

Gulak gets in a big boot on the way back inside and Cedric has banged up his neck. The neck crank goes on and we take a break. Back with Gulak’s continued logical offense, including some clotheslines and a chinlock. Gulak throws him over his back and pulls on the neck some more (close to a Gory Special) but since that can’t last long, Cedric is right back with a springboard Downward Spiral. With the wrestling not working, it’s time to hammer away at the head before sending him outside.

The big running flip dive hits Gulak again but he’s fine enough to break up a springboard. The Gulak over the ropes is half and half on the logical offense theme but the regular version can’t go on. A hard elbow to the head rocks Gulak, who comes right back with the biggest right hand I’ve ever seen him throw. The Neuralizer is countered into the ankle lock but Cedric rolls into a cradle for two. Cedric’s Spanish Fly is countered into a rollup for two, which is reversed into a stacked up rollup to give Cedric the pin at 10:43.

Rating: B-. This was the well done match that I was expecting, with Gulak going after the obvious target but not being able to finish off the more well rounded Alexander. Cedric was kind of a dull character but he is more than good enough to have a fast paced match like this. Gulak winning the title here would have been a good moment, but Cedric was hardly a bad choice for champion.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: B-Team vs. Revival

The B-Team is defending because WWE would rather laugh than go with a team they have invested so much in already. At least we get the B-TEAM B-TEAM GO GO GO entrance. Dallas headlocks Dawson down over but everything breaks down in a hurry with a shot to Dallas’ leg. The Shatter Machine hits the illegal Axel and a missile dropkick/spinebuster (Hart Attack variation) gets three straight twos on Dallas. More leg cranking takes us to a break and we come back with more leg cranking.

Dawson puts on a spinning toehold but gets kicked shoulder first into the post. Since Axel is still down (well done on making the Shatter Machine look awesome) though, it’s a backbreaker/middle rope knee for two more. Dallas grabs a hanging swinging neckbreaker on Wilder and now it’s back to Axel off the hot tag. Everything breaks down with the PerfectPlex being countered into a small package. Dallas shoves Wilder into the pile though and Axel winds up on top to retain at 6:12.

Rating: D+. This was the “let’s add a Raw match to the Kickoff Show because it’s for a title and people will care” theme and, as usual, it didn’t work very well. We’re three matches in and now the four hour Summerslam gets to start. It’s just one more thing added to the card that was completely forgettable and took a little bit more out of the fans. How does this make the night better?

Terry Crews is outside the Barclays Center and talks about the measure of success. You can feel the heartbeat in your chest to drive you and then you grind to find the moments that define success for you. Tonight, this is where dreams come true because all the world’s a stage. So what defines success and greatness and how bad do you want it? Go ahead and take a bow because we’ll let you take a bow because you’re about to bear witness to another great Summerslam. The things he was saying only kind of made sense, but sweet goodness that man can get you fired up for a show.

The CGI Empire State Building is over the ring again. You can’t see it live in the arena of course and that will mess you up when you see it on a monitor and not before your eyes.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Dolph Ziggler

Rollins is challenging with the freshly returned Dean Ambrose in his corner (because having him show up on Raw was far smarter than having him show up at Summerslam) to counter Drew McIntyre (because DOLPH ZIGGLER was the bigger prospect in 2018…..and kind of was in 2019 as well). As a bonus, Rollins is in Thanos inspired gear while Ziggler has a picture of the title over the front of his tights.

They go with the grappling to start with Rollins being backed up to the ropes, meaning it’s time for Ambrose to stare at McIntyre. The early superkick misses Rollins and Ziggler bails to the floor. That means a double staredown until Rollins throws him back in for some chops. Ziggler kicks at the leg to take over and we get a Flair Flip of all things. The chinlock goes on with Ziggler kicking the knee to keep Rollins down in a smart move.

Rollins’ comeback doesn’t last long as Ziggler backdrops him to the floor. Back in and Ziggler’s high crossbody is pulled out of the air but they crash to the floor again off of a suplex attempt (that’s always a scary looking spot). Back in again and Rollins gets two off a middle rope Blockbuster but Ziggler crotches him on top. Another superplex attempt is broken up and Rollins sends him outside for a suicide dive.

Rollins’ windup knee gets two but the buckle bomb is countered into a quickly broken sleeper. They fight to the apron with Ziggler kicking him into the post and nailing the DDT onto the apron for what should be a huge knockout. Since it’s this kind of a match though, it’s only good for two. Rollins hits him in the face again and gets his own two off the great looking frog splash.

Ziggler goes up top but Ziggler catches him with a reverse superplex into a reverse Falcon Arrow for a nice twist on the usual sequence. The fans give it a standing ovation so they seem to have some good taste. Hold on though as McIntyre sends Ambrose into the steps with the distraction letting Ziggler hit the Zig Zag for two. I blame the kickout on Cole declaring it over, which is the magical cure for a finisher. Rollins is busted open as he reverses a rollup into the buckle bomb. Dean gets back up and takes care of an interfering McIntyre, leaving Rollins to him the Stomp to get the title back at 22:02.

Rating: B. You don’t expect the opener to get this kind of time. The match was entertaining though it wasn’t quite the instant classic they were going for. It felt like the match was more of a collection of spots than a match that built on itself to get somewhere. That’s a great way to get an entertaining match and for what they were going for, I can certainly live with something like this. Maybe not the highest quality but very entertaining, which more or less defines Rollins.

Rollins and Ambrose celebrate a lot.

The Bellas are here to support their bestest friend ever Ronda Rousey, and to plug all their stuff of course. They might even get back in the ring at Evolution.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers

Big E. and Xavier Woods are challenging and it’s almost weird to see Kofi around a Tag Team Title match these days. Rowan wastes no time by spin kicking Woods in the face to start. Harper hits a big boot of his own and it’s off to the Gator Roll into the chinlock. A running splash from Rowan sets up the head vice as it’s total dominance to start. Big E. gets knocked off the apron and Woods is sent outside to join him, but Rowan can’t powerbomb Woods onto the steps.

A hurricanrana sends Harper into the steps and the hot tag brings in Big E. Belly to belly suplexes on the floor abound (with Harper landing on his head and thankfully not breaking something), followed by the Warrior Splash to Harper inside. Harper is right back with a Michinoku Driver but Big E. sends Rowan into the post. Woods hits a dive onto Rowan and Big E. spears Harper through the ropes.

Rowan is back up with his own dive off the apron to Big E. and things finally settle down a notch. Woods can’t complete a springboard tornado DDT as Harper reverses into a powerbomb for two, meaning it’s time for Kofi to play cheerleader. Apparently not a fan of cheerleading, Rowan plants Kofi but walks into the Big Ending.

Big E. Rock Bottoms Harper off the apron into what was supposed to be a backstabber from Woods, though it was more like Harper just landed on Woods’ legs. Eh can’t hit them all. Woods makes up for it by dropping the big elbow off the top to the floor and Harper is actually in trouble. UpUpDownDown is loaded up but Rowan hits Woods with the hammer for the DQ at 9:27.

Rating: B-. They didn’t play around here and went with the all action match, which was the right call here. Let them do whatever they wanted and have an entertaining match as a result. New Day was throwing everything they could against the unstoppable monsters and came close to getting a win. That’s the kind of hope spot you need over a team like the Brothers as you have to have a reason to believe something could happen in the future. That being said, it didn’t mean anything in the end as Rowan tore his bicep and New Day would win the titles in two days.

Post match the Brothers destroy New Day with the hammer.

Jon Stewart is here.

We recap Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman. Owens said he was on a role and tried to get Strowman’s help to win Money in the Bank. Strowman didn’t like it when Owens inevitably turned on him and threw him through a bunch of tables before winning the briefcase. The Strowman destroyed Owens’ car and put him in a portable toilet, which he knocked off the stage. Owens “beat” Strowman in a cage match when Strowman threw him off a cage so now it’s a rematch for the Money in the Bank briefcase.

Money In The Bank Briefcase: Braun Strowman vs. Kevin Owens

Strowman is defending and can lose the briefcase by losing in any way. An early pair of running splashes in the corner sends Owens outside and Strowman runs him over again. Owens’ superkick just makes Strowman angrier and it’s a chokeslam onto the ramp. The running powerslam finishes Owens at 1:55. Well that worked and makes Strowman look like the monster, but HAHA if you actually thought they would put the title on him.

Clip of a Be A Star rally.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match. Carmella cashed in Money in the Bank at the Smackdown after Wrestlemania and has been put over one name after another, though she is still seen as in over her head. Becky Lynch has been trying to get back to the top and is getting the shot here. Then Charlotte saved Becky from a beatdown and got a match where she could be added to the match if she won. Since it’s Charlotte, OF COURSE she was added in, which Becky saw as someone else trying to steal her chance. Charlotte did get in a good line with Carmella “is a Diva living in a woman’s world.”

Smackdown Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte vs. Carmella

Carmella is defending and we get the Big Match Intros, with the hometown champ not being well received. As I continue to not understand why the title belt is shown inside what looks like the Elimination Chamber during the graphic, the bell rings and Carmella starts running her mouth. Charlotte gets sent outside so Becky can hit a running legdrop but the second misses.

Carmella isn’t happy with Charlotte breaking up the cover but it’s time to get crafty. She slaps Becky in the head and blames Charlotte, who says she’s innocent as they knock Carmella to the floor. Becky and Charlotte trade rollups and it’s a standoff for some applause. An armbar puts Charlotte down for all of two seconds but Carmella is back in because she can’t just go away.

Becky gets sent into the steps so Carmella can shout and dance a lot. Charlotte is whipped down as well and Carmella takes Becky inside for, you know it, more shouting. She does even things out a bit with a chinlock until Charlotte comes back in, only to be taken down by the hair. Now it’s Charlotte getting chinlocked as we see the wide range of Carmella’s offense. Becky makes her own save, gets dropkicked down, and Carmella shouts about being champion again. How can she be repeating stuff that many times less than six minutes into a match?

Carmella mocks Becky’s pose and ducks a shot from Charlotte, which hits Becky instead. Some fall away slams drop Carmella and Charlotte nips up but Becky knees her in the face. A double missile dropkick puts Carmella and Charlotte down again with Charlotte being sent outside. Becky gets caught on top for a hurricanrana to give Carmella two, leaving herself open to Charlotte’s spear.

Since we can’t go that long with Carmella being on defense, she knocks Charlotte into the corner and shouts that no one cares about her anymore. Another hurricanrana out of the corner is countered into a Boston crab (with Charlotte driving her down from the corner almost like a Styles Clash) before switching to the Figure Four. That’s broken up with Becky’s top rope legdrop and they’re all down.

Becky gets up first and hammers on Carmella, who of course knocks her outside because SHE IS THE CHAMP. A rather hard suicide dive hits Becky but it’s Charlotte coming off the top with the moonsault, which goes right between them and barely makes contact, as usual. Back in and Carmella breaks up the Disarm-Her so Becky gets two off a Rock Bottom, with Carmella making ANOTHER save.

Carmella gets two off a superkick with Charlotte making the very last second save. Charlotte gets sent outside so it’s another superkick to Becky, who shrugs it off without much trouble. The Disarm-Her goes on but Charlotte dives in with Natural Selection for the pin on Becky at 14:42.

Rating: C+. The action was good but the important thing here is that Carmella can go off to do ANYTHING but be in the title picture. Her reign showed the entire problem with using Money in the Bank as a quick rise to the top: Carmella was never viewed as a serious wrestler but she won a ladder match and stole the title so now she can hang with Charlotte and Becky? It never worked and this match exposed how limited she was in the ring, with all the shouting and superkicks getting old in a hurry. She is perfectly fine as the cheerleader type character and it fits her SO much better, as time has proven.

The match itself was pretty good with a lot of saves and back and forth action, but I kept wanting Carmella to fall in a hole somewhere so the other two could have a better match. The fans wanted to see Becky and having Charlotte get the title back wasn’t the most thrilling result. Becky’s frustrations are proven right again and things could get interesting as a result.

Post match Becky hugs Charlotte but completely snaps, beating the fire out of her and throwing Charlotte over the announcers’ table to one of the biggest face reactions in forever. WWE actually tried to treat this as a heel turn for a bit before realizing that it just wasn’t working and strapped a rocket to Becky’s back, leading all the way to the main event of Wrestlemania and the biggest push in women’s history.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe. AJ has been champion for about nine months and has beaten a bunch of challengers so he issued an open challenge for Summerslam. Joe choked AJ out and signed the contract before starting his real attack. He called out AJ for neglecting his family but promised to send AJ home by ending the title reign. Then he read a letter from AJ’s wife, saying that everything Joe said was true and how much she wanted Joe to win.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Joe is challenging and the fans certainly seem to like him, though AJ isn’t exactly being booed. AJ’s wife and daughter are in the crowd so Joe breaks up the Big Match Intros and says hi to both of them, promising to send daddy home tonight. An early Koquina Clutch attempt doesn’t work and it’s a TNA chant for a little flashback. Joe gets in a cheap shot in the corner and then bails to the ropes as the mind games continue.

AJ takes him down with a headlock as they’re starting slowly (which is ok). Back up and a big shoulder sends AJ into the ropes as Graves explains the psychology in a rare bit of usefulness. They trade kicks to the leg so things can start picking up a bit. In what shouldn’t be a surprise, Joe wins the battle of the strikes at first but AJ keeps going with chops against the ropes.

The drop down into the dropkick has Joe in trouble and AJ knocks him outside. Since AJ isn’t that bright, he gets his leg kicked out to send him face first into the apron. Joe hits the big suicide elbow to send AJ into the announcers’ table, with Graves saying it’s like a flying school bus. Can someone explain to Graves that the Magic School Bus is fiction? Back in and a clothesline gives Joe two and the chinlock goes on.

That goes nowhere so AJ fights up and sends Joe outside for the slingshot forearm. Back in and the middle rope moonsault into the reverse DDT gets two but Joe is right back up with a middle rope leg lariat. A big boot into the backsplash is good for two more as Joe keeps using the power advantage. AJ’s fireman’s carry gutbuster hurts his own knee so Joe is right back with the snap powerslam (great one too).

AJ is right back up and manages the Styles Clash for two and the fans bought the near fall. The Rock Bottom out of the corner gives Joe a breather but AJ is right back with the Calf Crusher (remember the leg kicks earlier). You don’t put holds on Joe though and he slams AJ’s head into the mat for the break, quickly followed by the Koquina Clutch. A foot on the rope breaks things up so Joe takes it outside….and talks to AJ’s wife, saying AJ won’t be coming home but he’ll be her new daddy. You know it’s on now as AJ tackles Joe over the barricade and hits him with a chair for the DQ at 22:45.

Rating: B. This is one where the DQ finish makes sense to keep the story going, though I’m not sure why Joe, who has been very calculating this whole time, would do something like that when he was in control. It came off more like he was admitting he couldn’t beat AJ tonight and that’s not Joe’s style. What we did get was a solid back and forth match with AJ fighting his heart out and Joe using the power and size advantage to dominate the emotional champ. I’m certainly down for a rematch and that’s where this is obviously going.

Post match AJ beats the fire out of Joe with the chair, drawing a WHO’S YOUR DADDY chant. With Joe gone, AJ checks on his wife and daughter, the latter of whom says he’s bleeding. AJ: “I’m sorry.”

Here’s Elias for a song. Believe it or not, he was a child once but then he grew up and wrote a great album. That album included a song called Elias’ Words and knowing that the entire world loves you is an incredible feeling. Tonight we’re getting a new song and it might be his greatest yet. This song is dedicated to all of the New Yorkers out there tonight, because all of the dirt in their ears and mind and the harsh reality of living in this city is all about to be washed away. And then his guitar breaks. Well so much for that.

Miz runs into the B-Team backstage (why they’re still in their gear two hours after their match isn’t clear) but he doesn’t need their luck. Tonight he’s proving that he’s better than Daniel Bryan, but if they want to fetch the limo for the post match celebration, he’s good with that. They’re leaving actually because they have their own celebrating to do. They’re not the Miztourage anymore because they’re the B-Team. The B stands for Daniel Bryan and offer him a spot on their new reality show: “Total Fellas, but with a B, so Total Bellas!” Miz looks confused.

We recap the Miz vs. Daniel Bryan, which is eight years in the making. Miz was Bryan’s NXT Pro back in the day despite Bryan being much more experienced. Bryan broke away from Miz and turned into a star but never could shake the Miz, who thought Bryan was a huge fluke. Then Bryan got hurt and had to leave for years, with Miz taunting him after he walked away and retired. Miz called him out for being a coward and started using Bryan’s offense for years.

This included Miz’s incredible Talking Smack promo where Bryan called Miz a coward, sending Miz into an all time rant about how Bryan was the coward for not getting back in the ring while Miz was here every day. Then one day Bryan was medically cleared and everyone saw this match coming. Now it’s on the big stage as everyone is ready to see Bryan kick Miz’s head off. The theme is passion vs. fame and completely different ideologies about wrestling. It’s a natural rivalry and this match has more than earned a spot on this kind of a major show.

Daniel Bryan vs. The Miz

Miz’s wife and daughter are in the front row (who knew AJ was so influential). Bryan has talked for months about wanting to punch Miz in the face so he immediately balls up his fist, sending Miz into the ropes. Miz gets in the first few shots and fires off the kicks in the corner but the running dropkick is caught by the throat. Bryan gets to punch him in the face to a BIG reaction and now it’s Miz getting kicked in the corner for his efforts.

Another kick to the chest gets two but Miz takes him down for a surfboard. It turns out that Bryan knows how to escape that pretty easily and puts Miz in it to even things up. More YES Kicks (Graves: “Paying homage to the Miz.” Tom: “I swear to God.”) connect but Miz is right back with a hard clothesline to drop Bryan again. A cravate lets Miz hit some knees to the head and Bryan is back down.

The Reality Check gets two but Miz takes too long loading up the kicks, allowing Bryan to hit the moonsault out of the corner into the running clothesline. A hurricanrana out of the corner gets two and Miz is sent outside, meaning it’s the running dropkick through the ropes. The big dive to the floor drops Miz again and Bryan gets smart by tying him in the Tree of Woe for the kicks to the chest. The belly to back superplex gets two as it keeps getting worse for Miz.

Bryan misses the big YES Kick though and Miz hits a DDT for a breather. Miz’s YES Kicks just wake Bryan up so he catches a kick and hits Miz in the face (as promised). It’s too early for the running knee as Miz counters into a failed Figure Four attempt. The Skull Crushing Finale doesn’t fail though and gives Miz his next close two. With his chest looking very banged up, Miz’s running knee is countered with another kick to the head for two and they’re both dazed.

As tends to be the case at this point in a match, they had to the apron, where Bryan’s kick hits the post to give Miz a big target. He’s smart enough to go straight to the Figure Four but Bryan eventually turns it over to reverse the pressure. Miz isn’t smart enough to just unhook his leg so it’s a long crawl to the rope for the break. Bryan is right back on him by tying up Miz’s arm for the elbows to the face and then the YES Lock.

With Miz getting close to the rope, Bryan punches him in the back of the head for some good measure. Miz gets a boot on the rope and rolls to the floor, where Bryan hits the running knee from the apron. As luck would have it though, he winds up next to Maryse, who slips him something made of metal. Bryan tries a suicide dive but gets knocked cold with a shot to the head, allowing Miz to get the pin at 23:45.

Rating: B. It wasn’t the big, epic match they were shooting for but what we got was something that got pretty close to living up to the hype. The problem is it’s nearly impossible to live up to a reality that fans had in their heads after so long, but they did very well anyway. Miz being cocky the whole time but not being able to survive against the more naturally talented Bryan made perfect sense. The cheating leaves them wide open for a rematch and since Miz’s wife got involved, Bryan’s should as well, right?

Super ShowDown is coming, including HHH vs. Undertaker for the last time ever.

Video on Undertaker vs. HHH, which is quite the story.

Baron Corbin vs. Finn Balor

Corbin has been a jerk to Balor so it’s Demon time, thankfully in a complete surprise so we didn’t have to hear THE DEMON IS FINN BALOR’S ALTER EGO for a month. The entrance shakes Corbin, possible because he’s realized that he’s Baron Corbin. Balor dropkicks him to the floor at the bell and hits the Sling Blade. The running flip dive hits Corbin and Balor sends him into the barricade. As Coach tries to figure out why Balor doesn’t use the Demon more often, it’s a top rope double stomp to Corbin’s back and the Coup de Grace finishes at 1:22. Exactly what it should have been, assuming you absolutely have to have Corbin employed.

Brie Bella checks on Bryan and they’re not happy with Miz and Maryse. Bryan says his comeback has been a bust but Brie calms him down.

United States Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is defending and this is your “it just sounds cool” match of the show, as well as a rematch after Nakamura won the title in six seconds after a low blow last month. Jeff has been dealing with Randy Orton as of late as well so you can probably pencil in the interference. There’s no major contact for the first minute or so, meaning we need a COME ON from Nakamura. Hardy charges into a knee but stops to dance like Nakamura, which doesn’t sit well with the champ. Neither does Hardy doing COME ON as things actually get going.

Nakamura knees him in the face and grabs an arm trap chinlock, which is broken with a rather quick jawbreaker. Some more kicks have Hardy right back in trouble and we hit another chinlock. Jeff fights up again and hits something close to a Sling Blade to put them both down again. Another kick drops Hardy again though as he can’t seem to figure out that he needs to avoid the feet. He finally gets the idea as a running knee hits the buckle, allowing Hardy to nail the Whisper in the Wind for two.

Since that isn’t the most high impact move, Nakamura is right back with the hard knees but the low blow misses. Jeff dropkicks him down to set up the Swanton for a delayed two. With Nakamura rolling to the apron, Hardy tries another Swanton but crashes back first onto the apron for his efforts. Kinshasa retains the title at 10:57.

Rating: D+. The chinlocks hurt this one a lot and you could feel the energy going out of the crowd. This was around the time that Nakamura was putting it in coast mode and there wasn’t much that could draw him out. His charisma is more than enough to carry him, but it would be nice to see some effort into his matches. Jeff continues to drift around, which is pretty much all he does as a singles guy these days.

Post match Orton comes out but instead of going after Jeff, he just hits himself in the head and leaves without doing anything else. He can be an odd guy.

We recap Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss. Rousey had the Raw Women’s Title won at Money in the Bank but Bliss cashed in her briefcase to steal the title from Nia Jax. Bliss has been WAY too confident coming into this so Rousey has been suspended several times, yet still getting her title match here. Tonight Rousey is going to destroy Bliss and get the title for the first time.

Raw Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss

Ronda is challenging and has Natalya, whose dad Jim Neidhart died a few weeks back (meaning she has her dad’s Summerslam 1990 jacket on for a great touch). Oh and the Bellas are here too because they’re stars. Bliss hides in the ropes a few times to start as she is trying to delay the inevitable for as long as she can. A cheap shot is blocked by a single right hand to send Bliss outside.

Back in and Bliss bails a second time so Rousey turns her back and sits down to let Bliss get in safely. Bliss comes in and tries a chinlock, not realizing that it leaves her arm exposed. Rousey picks her up for the yet to be named Piper’s Pit and Bliss is on the floor again. The chase lets Bliss get in a few shots….and there’s the stare. Rousey unloads in the corner and hits the judo throws (while talking trash), setting up the armbar (with Bliss popping the arm out of joint as only she can) for the easy tap and the title at 4:38.

Rating: C+. This is one where the presentation was all that mattered. Rousey was never in any danger and the match was a complete squash, which was the right call. There was no reason to pretend that Bliss could be a threat to her and they didn’t waste their time on anything stupid. Rousey is the biggest star in the division and one of the biggest in the company, so making her champion was the obvious move, especially since she’s here full time.

Post match Rousey hugs Natalya and the Bellas. Guess which two are booed. Her husband gets a big kiss as well. Rousey’s husband that is, in case it’s not clear.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Roman Reigns has been chasing the title and the win against Brock Lesnar for the better part of forever, having lost at Wrestlemania XXXI, Wrestlemania XXXIV and Greatest Royal Rumble. Now we’re doing it again because these two are joined at the hip in an eternal chase. This time around they’re presenting it as Reigns is here and Lesnar isn’t, even though the fans don’t seem to think much of Reigns so his attendance doesn’t make much difference. They teased Heyman jumping to Reigns but it was dropped in all of ten seconds so Lesnar could beat Reigns up again.

Raw World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Reigns’ CGI entrance is a big dog head over the Shield logo, which is rather terrifying when you don’t know it’s coming. Lesnar is defending and Paul Heyman handles his Big Match Intro. Hold on though as Strowman comes out to say he’s going to be cashing in on whomever wins. Reigns hits three Superman Punches and two spears in the first thirty seconds but the third is countered into a guillotine choke.

That’s broken up with a spinebuster and we’re just over a minute in. Brock grabs it again so Reigns uses the same counter. For once it makes sense to have them laying down this early as they’ve beaten each other up quite a bit so far. Brock takes the gloves off and counters another Superman Punch into the rolling German suplexes. The fans say the two of them suck and Reigns escapes the F5.

A missed charge sends Reigns through the ropes and into Strowman, who Lesnar plants with an F5 on the floor. Reigns is thrown back in and Strowman grabs Lesnar’s leg. That earns him a beating with the briefcase, which Lesnar throws up to the stage (egads that’s not normal). Lesnar unloads with a chair, walks back inside and gets speared to give Reigns the title at 6:09.

Rating: D. NOW NEVER FIGHT AGAIN! This feud went on forever and their matches were the same finisher fests over and over again. Strowman could have been anything from the Monster to a stray puppy as he only served as a distraction to cost Lesnar the title. Reigns winning here doesn’t feel like some major moment, though it’s nice to have Lesnar FINALLY lose the title. They should have done this at Wrestlemania at the latest though and by the time they got here, no one cared and there was no reason for them to. At least it was shorter this time around so there is one minor positive. Just get on to any other feud, please.

Reigns poses as Strowman is still down to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. I had forgotten how good this show was as WWE managed to cut out a bunch of the nonsense and just roll with the awesome matches that have been well built up. It’s so frustrating to see what they’re capable of doing when they actually try because they don’t put in the effort so much of the time. This was an awesome show with nothing very bad (Reigns vs. Lesnar is more the result of everything that came before it between the two of them) and three or four matches that got time and lived up to it. Check this one out if you have the time, but completely skip the Kickoff Show.

Ratings Comparison

Zelina Vega/Andrade Cien Almas vs. Rusev/Lana

Original: D

2019 Redo: D+

Cedric Alexander vs. Drew Gulak

Original: C+

2019 Redo: B-

Revival vs. B-Team

Original: D+

2019 Redo: D+

Dolph Ziggler vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B

2019 Redo: B

Bludgeon Brothers vs. New Day

Original: C+

2019 Redo: B-

Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman

Original: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella

Original: C+

2019 Redo: C+

AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Original: A-

2019 Redo: B

The Miz vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: B+

2019 Redo: B

Finn Balor vs. Baron Corbin

Original: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: C

2019 Redo: D+

Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: C+

2019 Redo: C+

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: C+

2019 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: A-

2019 Redo: A-

Most of them are in the same ballpark, but AJ vs. Joe and Reigns vs. Lesnar must have canceled each other out. Still a great show though and one of the better ones WWE has done in recent(ish) memory.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/08/19/summerslam-2018-they-can-still-do-a-thing-or-two/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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