Smackdown – April 26, 2024 (Draft Night One): They Can Do Better

Smackdown
Date: April 26, 2024
Location: Heritage Bank Center, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Corey Graves, Wade Barrett

It’s time for the Draft and that means we will be seeing sixteen picks tonight, which could make for quite the shakeup. Only half of the roster is available to be selected tonight with the other half taking place on Monday Night Raw. We are also eight days away from Backlash and the show could use a boost. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Note that I was in the arena for this show, sitting in the upper seats, looking straight at a corner post with the entrance on my right.

Here are the Draft Rules:

• Raw, Smackdown and NXT stars are eligible
• Four rounds tonight, Six rounds on Raw
• Four picks per round
• Champions are protected
• Smackdown picks first tonight, Raw picks first on Monday
• The rosters lock May 6

Paul Heyman explains that Roman Reigns is voluntarily pulling out of the Draft because he doesn’t want to hog the #1 spot while he is not going to be around for a good while. That means Nick Aldis needs to make a new star and Heyman is intrigued.

NXT is excited about potential callups.

Corey Graves is in the ring to moderate a contract signing between AJ Styles and Cody Rhodes. Styles says it is time for some Georgia boys to fight. Their paths have not crossed before but Styles respects Cody for making a name for himself outside of WWE, just like Cody did. Styles learned a lot from Dusty Rhodes, including how to carry the title. At Backlash, we find out if Cody can carry it.

Styles signs, leaving Cody to talk about how there is respect between them. But when he signs this contract, it becomes a must win. Cody signs, leaving Styles to say the title reign ends at Backlash. Not much to this, but it’s not supposed to be some big epic story. That being said (and I wish I could take credit for this), at some point Cody is going to face someone who didn’t know Dusty and I have no idea what they are going to talk about.

With Styles gone, here is HHH to announce the first picks, with Cody joining him.

Smackdown
1. Bianca Belair
2. Carmelo Hayes (From NXT)

Monday Night Raw
1. Jey Uso
2. Seth Rollins

Cue Carmelo Hayes, who (after shrugging off some WHOOP THAT TRICK chants, a reference to his rivalry with Trick Williams in NXT) has been hearing Cody talk about how if you come at the king, you best not miss. Hayes never misses, and he’s shooting his shot against Cody tonight. Cody is in and we have a main event.

Legado del Fantasma vs. LWO

That would be Berto/Angelo vs. Rey Mysterio/Dragon Lee in this instance. Berto drops Lee to start but Lee is right back up with some elbows to the face. Angel low bridges Lee to the floor though and we take an early break. Back with Rey getting the hot tag and hitting a top rope seated senton. Berto is sent to the floor and it’s the 619 into Project Dragon to give Lee the pin on Angel at 5:26. Not enough shown to rate but it was a quick and to the point match, which really didn’t need a break.

Post match Santos Escobar pops up to say he is not a liar. That’s why he has had Elektra Lopez find the security footage of Dragon Lee being attacked. The footage shows Carlito, of the LWO that is, attacking Lee, and then jumping back in to act like he found him. Carlito lays out the LWO, making him the heel that he should have been a LONG time ago.

Bron Breakker vs. Cedric Alexander

Spear finishes Alexander at 15 seconds.

We look at Tiffany Stratton breaking up last week’s Women’s Title match.

Stratton tells Nick Aldis she should get the next Women’s Title match but Aldis has another idea. Bayley has suggested Naomi vs. Stratton for the title shot, with Stratton suggesting that Bayley be at ringside. Deal.

Here are Michelle McCool and Torrie Wilson for the next picks.

Smackdown
3. Randy Orton
4. Nia Jax

Monday Night Raw
3. Bron Breakker
4. Liv Morgan

The fact that Jax has “former model” as the third fact in her bio tells you a lot. Yes she’s a model, but apparently there wasn’t a third thing about her career worth mentioning.

We look at the Bloodline attacking Kevin Owens last week.

The Bloodline arrives and Solo Sikoa asks Paul Heyman if they have been drafted. Heyman recaps the Roman Reigns issue and says no one has drafted the Bloodline because they don’t know who it includes. Tama Tonga shows up and here is Kevin Owens to brawl with him.

Here is Bianca Belair for a chat. She is ready to win the Women’s Tag Team Titles with Jade Cargill to continue ending Damage CTRL. Cue the Kabuki Warriors but Jade Cargill cuts them off. Cue Kevin Owens and Tama Tonga to brawl to the ring, with Solo Sikoa joining them. Randy Orton comes in for the save and the Bloodline bails after a brawl.

Here are the Dudley Boyz for round three.

Smackdown

5. LA Knight
6. Bloodline

Monday Night Raw

5. Ricochet
6. Sheamus

Tiffany Stratton vs. Naomi

Bayley is at ringside. Naomi starts fast so Stratton bails to the floor, where Naomi hits a baseball slide. Back in and Stratton hits a running hip attack to the back of the head, only for Naomi to tie her up in the ropes. A jumping faceplant sends Stratton outside and Naomi dives onto her as we take a break. Back with Stratton getting two off a spinebuster but Naomi grabs a headscissors driver for the same. They both grab swinging faceplants for a double knockdown…and here is Nia Jax to jump Bayley on commentary. Naomi goes out for the save and gets sent into the post for the DQ at 6:18.

Rating: C+. This didn’t have much time to get anywhere but the biggest problem is Jax being around. She brought things down on Raw and now she is going to get to do it again here. That is hardly the best news imaginable and it wouldn’t shock me to see her added to the title match at Backlash. Either that or get the next one after that. Either way, it doesn’t give me hope for the future of the division.

Post match Jax leaves and Stratton hits Bayley and Naomi with the Prettiest Moonsault Ever.

The Street Profits and B Fab are ready to win the Tag Team Titles next week. Cue A Town Down Under, who mock the Cincinnati Bengals, and get scared off by Bobby Lashley.

The Final Testament attacks the New Catch Republic. Karrion Kross promises to continue the violence no matter what.

Here are Teddy Long and JBL for the final picks.

Smackdown

7. AJ Styles
8. Andrade

Monday Night Raw

7. Alpha Academy
8. Kiana James (From NXT)

Here are the final picks:

Smackdown
1. Bianca Belair
2. Carmelo Hayes (From NXT)
3. Randy Orton
4. Nia Jax
5. LA Knight
6. Bloodline
7. AJ Styles
8. Andrade

Monday Night Raw
1. Jey Uso
2. Seth Rollins
3. Bron Breakker
4. Liv Morgan
5. Ricochet
6. Sheamus
7. Alpha Academy
8. Kiana James (From NXT)

Video on Kiana James (which is good, as the fans were silent after her name was called).

James is in NXT and is ready to show what got her this far. Shawn Michaels comes in for the hug.

Nick Aldis announces Bayley defending against Tiffany Stratton and Naomi at Backlash. He brings in Teddy Long to announce the Bloodline vs. Randy Orton/Kevin Owens.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Carmelo Hayes vs. Cody Rhodes

Non-title. Hayes starts fast with a springboard clothesline, only to get knocked outside as we take a break less than a minute in. Back with Hayes escaping a headlock and elbowing Rhodes into the corner. They trade chops in the corner with Rhodes getting the better of things, only to have Hayes come back with a spinning faceplant.

The springboard DDT gets two but Rhodes is back with a Disaster Kick for two. Rhodes goes old school with a running powerslam for two more, followed by the Cody Cutter for the same. Hayes is back with the First 48 (Codebreaker) but they both try springboards at the same time and miss (Rhodes seemed to come up favoring his shoulder). Rhodes has had it and grabs Cross Rhodes for the pin at 8:42.

Rating: B-. The only thing that matters right now is Rhodes’ shoulder, which hopefully is just banged up and not seriously hurt. They went home in a hurry after the landing but at the same time, they were only going to be able to go so much longer. Hayes looked good here, but that has been the case with his previous Smackdown previews. Nice main event here, as Hayes gets to rub elbows with the big star.

AJ Styles comes in after the match for a rather intense handshake but no violence as the show ends.

Overall Rating: C+. Obviously this was a show where the wrestling wasn’t the point, but this was kind of a dull show. They did a bunch of stuff for Backlash and it still isn’t enough to shake off the feeling that it is a glorified house show. The Draft stuff was just kind of there, with Hayes and Breakker feeling important and not much else. I didn’t dislike the show, but I was expecting a good bit more than what we got here.

Results
LWO b. Legado del Fantasma – Project Dragon to Angel
Bron Breakker b. Cedric Alexander – Spear
Naomi b. Tiffany Stratton via DQ when Nia Jax interfered
Cody Rhodes b. Carmelo Hayes – Cross Rhodes

 

 

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Smackdown – April 19, 2024: The Show Setting Up The Show After The Show Before The Show

Smackdown
Date: April 19, 2024
Location: PPG Paints Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Corey Graves, Wade Barrett

We have just a few weeks before Backlash and that means it is time to crown a new #1 contender. That gets covered this week, as LA Knight meets AJ Styles in a Wrestlemania rematch for the shot against Cody Rhodes at Backlash. Other than that, we very well may be in for some new Tag Team Title belts. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We run down the card.

AJ Styles vs. LA Knight

For the World Title shot against Cody Rhodes at Backlash. Knight grabs a headlock to start and puts the brakes on before Styles can hit the dropkick. They head outside with Knight ramming him into the announcers’ table, as is Knight’s custom. A running dropkick through the ropes puts Styles down again and we take a break.

Back with Knight slugging away but stereo crossbodies leave them both down. They slug it out with Knight getting the better of things and taking Styles up top. The top rope superplex gives Knight two but Styles is back with the Pele. It’s too early for the Phenomenal Forearm so Knight slams him down, setting up the jumping elbow. Styles heads to the apron and manages a quick poke to the eye, setting up the Phenomenal Forearm to go to Backlash at 11:04.

Rating: C+. Styles makes good sense as Cody’s first challenger as Knight would be too popular. Cody vs. Styles will be at least a perfectly acceptable match between two talented stars and Cody should look good as a result. I’m not wild on Knight losing so soon after Wrestlemania, but at least he got his big win there, which is better than nothing at all.

We look back at Tama Tonga debuting and wiping Jimmy Uso out of the Bloodline.

Earlier today, Solo Sikoa, in a very nice suit, meets Paul Heyman in the back and introduces Tama Tonga as the newest member of the Bloodline. Heyman doesn’t seem sure about this but Sikoa cuts him off and wants to know if Kevin Owens is here.

Here is Nick Aldis in the ring to introduce HHH for an announcement. HHH talks about the amazing future that Nick Aldis (and Adam Pearce) are leading us into, so we need Grayson Waller and Austin Theory out here. They get right to the point: the team will now be known as the WWE Tag Team Champions, complete with new belts, which look like the old WWF World Tag Team Titles. Since we have new champions, we need new challengers so let’s do this.

Well also after Naomi says she isn’t letting her friendship with Bayley get in the way of winning the Women’s Title tonight.

Street Profits vs. New Catch Republic vs. Legado del Fantasma vs. AOP

Austin Theory and Grayson Waller are on commentary. Ford headlocks Bate to start but Bate technicals him down without much effort. It’s quickly off to Berto to get in a cheap shot on Ford, setting up a running knee from Angel. The AOP aren’t having this and come in to wreck people as we take a break.

Back with Akam hitting Ford in the face and grabbing an over the shoulder backbreaker. Ford manages to slip out and get over to Bate for a tag as everything breaks down. As the champs can’t focus because of their beautiful new titles, a Tower of Doom (or most of one) leaves some people down, with Bate being double gorilla pressed off the top to make it worse. An assisted powerbomb gets two on Bate but the Republic is back with stereo ankle locks to Legado. Those are broken up and we take another break.

Back again with Rezar powerbombing Dawkins and Bate getting planted as well. The Republic escape the Super Collider and knock the AOP outside as everything breaks down again. Berto’s springboard spinning kick to the face gets two on Dawkins but Dawkins is right back up for the Doomsday Blockbuster. Bate snaps Dawkins’ fingers before the Republic and Ford all hit flip dives to the floor. Back in and Berto clotheslines Bate, setting up Angel’s Lionsault. Ford frog splashes in for the save and the Revelation gives Dawkins the pin on Angel at 17:14.

Rating: B-. This got more time than I was expecting and it worked pretty well. The biggest story here is getting the first challengers set up for the new champs and the Profits are great choices. They’re the kind of team who could conceivably give the new champs a run for their money or even win the titles, but they could also be a good set of first victims. Nice match here, with the time flying by.

We look at Rhea Ripley vacating the Women’s Title due to her shoulder injury.

Bayley is a bit shaken up by what she saw Rhea Ripley do on Raw but she’s not losing tonight.

Paul Heyman and Solo Sikoa keep looking for Kevin Owens but Heyman tells him that he (as in Solo) isn’t allowed to make these decisions yet. Sikoa: “Are you done yet?” They come into the arena and, after a break, Heyman talks about being one of the better backstage politickers in WWE. We pause for a WE WANT ROMAN chant, which has Heyman a bit broken up, but Solo takes the mic.

Sikoa says he had to lose a brother last week to gain a new member of the Bloodline in Tama Tonga. Cue Tonga, who is beating Kevin Owens down the aisle. Referees help Owens to the back as Sikoa and Tonga pose, but (the very bloody) Owens comes back, only to get beaten down by the Bloodline again. Nick Aldis eventually comes in and the Bloodline leaves. Heyman is selling the heck out of this stuff, as the fear he is showing makes me want to know what happens when Reigns, or someone else, shows up again.

Post break Nick Aldis drags Paul Heyman to the parking lot where Tama Tonga’s car has rammed into Kevin Owens’. Heyman is aghast but Aldis threatens him with repercussions if he doesn’t get this under control.

Santos Escobar vs. Carlito

Elektra Lopez and Zelina Vega are here too. Carlito hammers away to start and sends him outside, setting up a dropkick through the ropes. Vega poses on Carlito’s shoulders and we take a break. Back with Escobar snapping off a super hurricanrana as Vega is looking terrified. The armbar goes on but Carlito fights up to make the clothesline comeback. The women get into a brawl on the floor and the distraction lets Escobar hit the Phantom Driver for the pin at 7:37.

Rating: C. Not much to this one, which has been the case for almost everything Carlito has done in recent months. They seem to be pointing towards Carlito being revealed as the guy who took out Dragon Lee, but it almost feels too obvious. At the same time, a heel turn could do Carlito some good, as he doesn’t have anything going on at the moment.

Damage CTRL is in a sky box…but Jade Cargill and Bianca Belair pop up next to them to watch the main event.

Cody Rhodes, currently in England on the UK tour, praises AJ Styles and says he’s looking forward to the title match at Backlash.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Naomi

Naomi is challenging and they fight over wrist control to start. Bayley takes her down into an armbar but Naomi fights up with a springboard bulldog. The Rear View gives Naomi two and we take a break. Back with Naomi hitting a high crossbody for two but Bayley knocks her down for a change. The top rope elbow only hits raised knees though and Naomi grabs a slingshot X Factor.

Naomi’s split legged moonsault hits raised knees and now the top rope elbow connects for two. It’s too early for the Rose Plant and Naomi pulls her into the reverse Rings Of Saturn. Bayley gets to the rope so it’s time to slug it out/yell at each other. Both of them crash out to the floor, where Bayley hits a Bayley onto the announcers’ table…and cue Tiffany Stratton to jump Bayley for the DQ at 11:17.

Rating: C+. There’s a good chance that this is setting up a triple threat for the title at Backlash and that isn’t a bad way to go. Stratton interfering here makes sense but they waited long enough that her interference still felt like a surprise instead of waiting around for her to come in. Naomi has some complaining to do here and we should be in for a showdown when she gets another chance.

Stratton sends them inside for the double Prettiest Moonsault Ever to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. They were in a weird spot with this show as they had to set some things up for Backlash, but with the biggest story being “Roman Reigns isn’t here and the Bloodline is going nuts” and the Draft next week, it wasn’t the most important feeling of a show. What matters is they had a good enough show with some nice action, but everything is changing next week and they knew it.

Results
AJ Styles b. LA Knight – Phenomenal Forearm
Street Profits b. Legado del Fantasma, New Catch Republic and AOP – Revelation to Angel
Santos Escobar b. Carlito – Phantom Driver
Bayley b. Naomi via DQ when Tiffany Stratton interfered

 

 

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Smackdown – April 12, 2024: The Wheels Keep Moving

Smackdown
Date: April 12, 2024
Location: Little Caesars Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Corey Graves, Wade Barrett

It’s the first Smackdown after Wrestlemania and the big story is Cody Rhodes finishing the story, meaning it is time to find out what is next. That could go in a variety of different directions and after Raw, we aren’t likely to see the Rock anytime soon. I’m curious about where this an everything else goes so let’s get to it.

Here are Night One and Night Two of Wrestlemania if you need a recap.

We open with a quick Wrestlemania recap.

Here is Cody Rhodes to quite the hero’s welcome, including the YOU DESERVE IT chant that delays the start of his chat. Cody talks about how the Rock interrupted him on Raw and it made him think of someone from Detroit. That someone would say “who the h*** told you tonight was open mic night b****?”

After that line from Cody’s wife Brandi Rhodes from a few years ago on AEW Dynamite, Cody apologizes for the swearing and talks about the Rock handing him something we couldn’t see. Cody doesn’t say what it was but says that with Rock going off to Hollywood, he’s in the rear view mirror. That means it is time to get ready for Backlash in France, where he will be facing one of six wrestlers.

Cody goes over the six options (Santos Escobar, Rey Mysterio, LA Knight, AJ Styles, Bobby Lashley and Kevin Owens) and says in some cases you need to find out who the better man is. We are sold out here in Detroit and he is no longer the hunter but rather the hunted. To those six wrestlers, if you come at the king, you better not miss. For those of you don’t know him, he was undesirable, became undeniable and is now undisputed. This was the short form victory speech from Cody, but he moved towards his first challenger so the wheels continue to turn.

The Bloodline finds Cody Rhodes’ dressing room, with Kevin Owens sticking his head out. Solo Sikoa says he’ll take care of this. Paul Heyman says winning and losing matters here and if you want the locker room back, the title has to come back to the Bloodline. That’s from the Tribal Chief, so Sikoa seems to rethink things.

Sheamus is coming back.

LA Knight vs. Santos Escobar vs. Bobby Lashley

The winner faces the winner of another triple threat match for the Backlash title shot. After seeing a clip of Legado del Fantasma saying they didn’t attack Dragon Lee last week, it’s a brawl to start with Lashley taking over. Lashley and Knight head outside, with Escobar diving onto both of them as we take a break about a minute in.

Back with Lashley cleaning house until Knight knocks him to the floor. Knight takes over on Escobar…and here is Legado to beat him down, including a triple powerbomb. Lashley comes back in but gets beaten down as well, with the Street Profits coming in for the save. With everyone else gone, Knight hits the BFT to pin Escobar at 8:34.

Rating: C+. The action was good but there was a lot packed into this and that might not have been a good thing. Having that many people run in made the match feel secondary and that shouldn’t be the case in a match with some actual stakes. Knight winning should be setting up a rematch with AJ Styles next week and that is a good way to go.

The LWO doesn’t believe that Legado del Fantasma didn’t take out Dragon Lee. Rey Mysterio says he’s done a lot in recent years, but he thinks he has one more run as WWE Champion.

Here is the Bloodline for a chat. Paul Heyman talks about how things went badly at Wrestlemania and brings up Seth Rollins being the big problem. Rollins came in and distracted Reigns, who gave into temptation and went after Rollins so the focused Cody Rhodes could end everything. Cody Rhodes is the new undisputed WWE Champion, but like a phoenix rising from the ashes….and Solo Sikoa cuts Heyman off.

Sikoa says loses matter, so there are consequences to losing, right? Heyman agrees, with Sikoa saying consequences need change. Heyman panics, but Sikoa moves him aside to look at Jimmy Uso. Sikoa slowly hugs him, says he loves him, and then steps aside so the debuting Tama Tonga can jump Jimmy. The beatdown is on and Tama poses, with Sikoa pulling Heyman over to them (Heyman: “NO PLEASE!”).

Heyman gets to do the pose with them and tries to call Roman Reigns, but Sikoa knocks the phone out of his hand and stomps on it. Jimmy gets the chair wrapped around his head in the corner, where Sikoa says he loves him and the running hip attack (Heyman: “THIS IS NOT WHAT THE TRIBAL CHIEF WANTS!”) connects. The Bloodline leaves, with Heyman looking terrified/bewildered and Jimmy looking dead. This was tremendous, with Heyman selling things as only he can and a feeling of “when the Tribal Chief is away, the mice will play”. The Bloodline continues, and now we get to see where things go in the new direction.

Cameron Grimes vs. Bron Breakker

Breakker wrestles him around to start and hits the Steiner Line. Grimes manages some kicks out of the corner but goes up and is kind of World’s Strongest Slammed out of the air. The spear finishes for Breakker at 1:19. If Breakker can be healthy, he’s World Champion in a few years.

AJ Styles is ready for Rey Mysterio and Kevin Owens and hopes LA Knight is watching.

Here is Bayley for a chat and the fans really seem to love her again. She talks about how good it feels to hear that again and how she has been champion before. This time feels different though because she beat Iyo Sky to get here. It represents the most talented locker room she has ever been a part of, but even more than that, it’s because of all of the fans. The fans never gave up on her and she thanks them so much.

Let’s start this off right by giving someone a new opportunity so here is Tiffany Stratton to interrupt. She isn’t sure why she wasn’t invited to Wrestlemania so she accepts the challenge. Bayley wasn’t talking about “Terry” because she had someone else in mind: Naomi. Tiffany: “NAOMI? She couldn’t win a title if it glowed in the dark!” Cue Naomi, with Tiffany saying she already beat her. Naomi takes the coat off and says Tiffany is trying her on the wrong night. She can’t accept Bayley’s challenge just yet because she needs to beat Tiffany right here and now. Bayley is slipping right back into her old style and that is great.

Paul Heyman checks on Jimmy Uso, when Tama Tonga comes in to say by orders of the Tribal Chief (Heyman is scared again), and Solo Sikoa comes in with the taped thumb. Tonga and Sikoa leave. Heyman: “What the h*** does that mean?” Lost and confused Heyman is working very well.

Tiffany Stratton vs. Naomi

Non-title and Bayley is at ringside. We’re joined in progress with Naomi running the ropes but getting knocked down. Stratton takes her into the corner for some shots to the ribs but Naomi hits a knee to the face. Back up and Naomi hammers away, only to be sent outside for a crash as we take a break. We come back with Naomi hitting a middle rope spinning kick to the head. Stratton drops her again and hits a running double stomp for two of her own. The Prettiest Moonsault Ever misses though and Naomi grabs a rollup for the pin at 9:16.

Rating: C. They needed to give Naomi a win to set her up for her title shot and while I could have gone with it not being against Stratton, this was the right way to go. Stratton is going to be around the title picture sooner than later and it wouldn’t shock me to see her cause some mayhem when Naomi gets her shot.

Grayson Waller and Austin Theory brag about winning the Smackdown Tag Team Titles.

The Street Profits and New Catch Republic are watching the video. Nick Aldis says we’ll find the next challengers next week.

Logan Paul brags about beating a legend in Randy Orton and a dunce in Kevin Owens. It was the biggest Wrestlemania ever and that’s because of him.

Chelsea Green/Piper Niven vs. Jade Cargill/Bianca Belair

This is Niven’s first match in about two months. Belair beats up Green to start so it’s off to Niven, who tries going after the braid. That doesn’t work at all as it’s off to Cargill, who hits Jaded for the pin at 1:22. Yeah that worked.

Kevin Owens takes a Detroit Tigers WWE Title belt and, after shoving a CM Punk shirt off the table, talks about how he’s going to win. Also, Dominik Mysterio sucks.

Rey Mysterio vs. Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles

The winner gets LA Knight next week for the shot against Cody Rhodes at Backlash. Styles gets sent to the floor to start but he cuts off Rey’s dive without much trouble. Owens knocks Styles down and hits a Cannonball against the barricade. Rey drops Owens and we take an early break.

Back with Styles flipping Rey into a tornado DDT on Owens but being able to block the 619. Owens is back in and Styles is sent outside, leaving Owens to hit the swinging superplex on Mysterio. With everyone back in, Owens German suplexes both of them at once for a rather nasty landing and a triple breather. Rey tries the 619 on Styles but Owens breaks it up and hits a Stunner to send Rey outside. The Swanton hits knees so Rey and AJ go up. Styles hits a Styles Clash to send Rey onto Owens, which is enough to give Styles the pin at 9:14.

Rating: B-. They did some cool stuff in here but Styles was the only winner that made sense here. Styles vs. Knight II for the title shot is a good way to go and it wouldn’t surprise me to see Styles move on. Styles is a perfect choice to be Rhodes’ first challenger, as beating him would mean something but it’s not wasting a big title shot. For now though, nice main event to set up next week.

LA Knight comes out for the staredown with Styles to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. The Bloodline stuff was the highlight here, with Tama Tonga being added in a good moment. Other than that, they set up a #1 contenders match to get us the Backlash main event and gave us Bayley’s first challenger. Throw in squashes for Bron Breakker and Jade Cargill and this was a fun show which also played off what we saw at Wrestlemania.

Results
LA Knight b. Santos Escobar and Bobby Lashley – BFT to Escobar
Bron Breakker b. Cameron Grimes – Spear
Naomi b. Tiffany Stratton – Rollup
Jade Cargill/Bianca Belair b. Chelsea Green/Piper Niven – Jaded to Green
AJ Styles b. Kevin Owens and Rey Mysterio – Super Styles Clash to Mysterio

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXXVIII Night Two (2023 Redo): They Had To Make A Sequel

Wrestlemania XXXVIII Night Two
Date: April 3, 2022
Location: AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Texas
Attendance: 78,453
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith
America The Beautiful: Jesse James Decker

It’s the second half of the show and WWE has a lot to live up to after the first night. This half is built around the unification match for the WWE and Universal Titles as Brock Lesnar faces Roman Reigns in the BIGGEST WRESTLEMANIA MATCH EVER (THIS YEAR!). Other than that, Pat McAfee is facing Austin Theory in a match that has gotten a lot of TV time. Let’s get to it.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the third deck with the stage on my right.

Jesse James Decker performs America The Beautiful.

Video on Night One.

Mark Walhberg talks about how the sequel is almost never quite as good as the original, but it might be tonight. This is going to be all about the emotions and it’s not edge of your seat, but out of your seat. Points for doing a separate video instead of the same one again.

Here is HHH to get things going. He gets his full entrance and poses on every corner…before being handed a pair of boots. With the boots in the ring, he thanks the fans and welcomes us to Wrestlemania as pyro goes off. HHH goes over to hug his family (including Stephanie McMahon, his children and others) and leaves to the side of the ramp. This would be his retirement due to his heart issues and you can probably imagine he was going to have at least one more big match.

Gable Steveson is here again.

Raw Tag Team Titles: RKBro vs. Alpha Academy vs. Street Profits

RKBro is defending and these teams have been fighting over the titles for weeks, with only the Profits not winning them at some point. Otis cleans house to start before all six get in for the big brawl. With the ring clearing out, Ford hits the big running flip dive to the floor, followed by Gable moonsaulting onto almost everyone. Back in and Otis splashes Riddle but slaps him around instead of covering.

Gable comes in to work on Riddle’s leg but Riddle fights up. Ford is back in and gets over to Dawkins for the tag so house can be cleaned. Otis splashes Dawkins and Riddle but misses a charge into the corner. Riddle Bro To Sleeps Dawkins and Orton comes in to clean house. The Academy is dropped onto the announcers’ table but Otis is back up to take out everyone else. Gable is back up with a Steiner Bulldog for two on Ford but Dawkins breaks up a Vader Bomb.

The Profits hit a Doomsday Blockbuster on Gable before knocking Riddle outside. Dawkins blocks the RKO and hits a spinebuster on Orton before flip diving onto Otis. Ford loads up a frog splash….but Riddle springboards to the top to RKO him back down in an awesome spot. Not to be outdone, Gable goes up but Orton pulls him out of the air into the RKO to retain at 11:32.

Rating: B-. This was the usual wild triple threat match that would have felt fine on a big time house show. Watching Riddle and Orton hit one RKO after another is always fun as they really did have it down to a science. While it was entertaining, I couldn’t have told you this opened the show to save my life as it had absolutely no staying power.

Post match the Profits and RKO are ready to share a drink. Hold on though as they want Gable Steveson to join them. Steveson gets in, but Gable knocks the cup out of his hand. Orton and Riddle look stunned (Orton’s face is hilarious) as Steveson takes his shirt off. Gable demands respect as the ring clears out. Gable even has some advice for Steveson: SHHHHHHHHHHUSH! That earns him an overhead belly to belly and now the toasting can ensue.

Bobby Lashley vs. Omos

No MVP here despite him being Lashley’s manager. Omos powers him down to start and then drives Lashley face first into a knee. Lashley tries to power out of a head vice but gets clotheslined down instead. Omos hits a charge in the corner (or close to it, as he somehow missed a running splash) but Lashley starts hammering away. The Hurt Lock is blocked though and Omos clotheslines him down.

Lashley manages to catch him on the ropes and goes up, only to be pulled out of the air for a fireman’s carry slam. Back up and Lashley charges into a bearhug, which is driven hard into the corner. The bearhug goes on again but Lashley fights out again and slugs away. Somehow Lashley manages a suplex (egads) and a spear to the back sets up the regular version to finish Omos at 6:36.

Rating: C-. This was the spectacle match of the show and it was only so good. There are only so many things that Omos can do in the ring and Lashley made it work as well as it could. Not a good match but they did keep it short and it didn’t get too insane. The suplex worked as a big spot too so it could have been worse, as weak as it was.

We recap Johnny Knoxville vs. Sami Zayn. Knoxville was in the Royal Rumble to do publicity for his new Jackass movie and Zayn freaked out, sending him into an obsessive feud to destroy Knoxville once and for all. Then Knoxville fought back by having Zayn’s phone number flown on a banner above Los Angeles, resulting in Zayn receiving 60,000+ texts. The solution: an anything goes match.

Sami Zayn vs. Johnny Knoxville

Anything goes and Zayn kicks him in the face at the bell to start fast. They head outside with Zayn sending him into the barricade right in front of the Jackass crew. The crew goes after him, allowing Knoxville to come up with a fire extinguisher blast for a breather. Back in and Zayn busts out the cookie sheet to take over before switching over to a crutch. With that broken over Knoxville’s back, it’s time to bring in a table (of course).

Zayn goes for another table….and gets his hand caught in a mouse trap. It seems that there is a table covered in them (because reasons of Knoxville) and the delay lets Knoxville bang some trashcan lids around Zayn’s head. Knoxville sets up the table in the corner but gets suplexed through it instead. The helluva Kick is loaded up but Knoxville whips out an airhorn to cut it off.

Cue part of the Jackass crew, with a guy described as a party boy dancing and stripping (Cole: “It’s Naked Mideon 2.0!”). Zayn takes him out and Knoxville uses the distraction to grab a rollup for two. With the party boy kicked underneath the ring, Wee Man (he’s short) pops out and beats Zayn up, including a slam back inside (the place goes NUTS for that). Knoxville’s tornado DDT gets two as commentary is losing it over this whole thing.

Wee Man pulls out a machine with a boot attached and designed to kick someone low. Instead Zayn kicks him in the face and sends him outside before going up top. That’s fine with Knoxville, who whips out a remote control to spray pyro from the corner Zayn is standing on. With Zayn down in the corner, there’s a bowling ball between the legs and then the boot machine kicks him low again.

Knoxville whips out a tazer (sure) so Zayn runs….right into a giant hand that slaps him in the face. Back in and Zayn grabs a suplex before going up again. This time, Knoxville tongs him low and sends Zayn flying through the mousetrap table. Now the Jackass crew pulls out a giant mousetrap (just go with it) and Knoxville tazes Zayn onto it, with the trap springing for the pin (ignore Zayn’s shoulders being on the trap and not the mat) at 14:33.

Rating: B-. This is the definition of “it wasn’t for me”, but the stadium was going NUTS for the whole thing and they embraced everything insane about the whole thing. It was a total stunt show instead of a match (which is what it needed to be) and Zayn got wrecked by one stunt after another. I never need to see it again, but for a one off, it was goofy fun. Less than three weeks later, Zayn would need something to make him feel better after all this, so he started talking to the Bloodline. Not bad for a next step.

Here’s part of Drew McIntyre beating Happy Corbin last night and then cutting the ring ropes.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Carmella/Queen Zelina vs. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Natalya/Shayna Baszler

One fall and Carmella/Vega are defending. Banks and Naomi ride out in a rather expensive looking car while Liv and Rhea have something of a Catwoman/Donnie Darko theme. Ripley starts and no one wants to fight her until Banks comes in for the staredown. Banks gets powered down but comes back up with an armbar that doesn’t last long. Riptide is blocked and Banks realizes she needs to think twice here.

Naomi comes in but everything breaks down with most of the, going outside. Banks and Morgan both hit dives before going back inside for a staredown. Back to back Codebreakers rock Morgan and Oblivion makes it worse, only to have Natalya take Morgan down. Baszler comes in and stomps on Morgan’s leg as things slow back down. The leg cranking ensues before Carmella comes in to send Morgan into the corner.

Everything breaks down again with Carmella hurricanranaing Ripley off the top. Naomi and Banks hit double Eat Defeat on Morgan and go up, only to have it broken up. That means stereo Towers of Doom, with Morgan and Ripley handling the powerbombs. Everyone is down for a bit until Riptide into a backstabber gives Ripley two on Naomi.

Morgan breaks up Baszler’s cover on Naomi and gets faceplanted for her efforts. A Hart Attack is broken up and Carmella takes Naomi down for some near falls. Banks is back in with a frog splash to Carmella but Vega breaks up the Crossface. The Meteora from the apron hits Vega and Naomi kicks Carmella in the head. A wheelbarrow slam/Codebreaker combination hits Carmella to give Banks the pin and the titles at 10:50.

Rating: C. It wasn’t exactly great and as usual, there were so many people here that it might as well have been a free for all. The wrestling was only so good and the titles feeling so completely unimportant doesn’t help. These feel like thrown together teams fighting over the titles and that doesn’t quite make it feel Wrestlemania worthy. If these titles are supposed to mean something, stop having makeshift teams fighting over them. At least you now have a steady pair of hands in Naomi and Banks to hold them, as they should be fine for a long time to come.

We look back at Miz and Logan Paul beating the Mysterios and then breaking up because Paul wanted to leave as a good guy.

We recap Edge vs. AJ Styles. Edge wanted a special opponent so Styles accepted, only for Edge to go full villain and Conchairto him. Now Styles is back and wanting revenge.

AJ Styles vs. Edge

Styles is bleeding from the side of his face, apparently having hit himself on the set on the way in. Since it’s Wrestlemania, Edge rises up onto a throne surrounded by fire. They stare at each other to start until Styles starts knocking him away. The dropkick looks to set up the Calf Crusher but Edge is straight over to the ropes. Back up and Edge is sent outside, with Styles ramming him head first into the steps to make things more violent.

The springboard 450 hits raised knees back inside, with Edge holding his knee in something that rarely happens off of that counter. Edge’s knee is fine enough for the posing before he kicks away at Styles. The abdominal stretch goes on but Styles goes after the knee to break it up. A shoulder breaker cuts Styles down again though and they’re down long enough that we can look at some of the giant graphics for the match around the stadium.

Back up and Styles misses a hard charge into the corner and they’re both down again. Edge hits a Codebreaker onto the bad arm and it’s time to crank on both arms at once. Styles can’t Pele his way out of trouble as Edge pulls him into an STF, which he switches into a Crossface (sounds like a Samoa Joe fan). That’s broken up with a quick rope break and we slow down again.

Edge misses a spear and Styles grabs a slingshot DDT for the double knockdown (again). Styles goes up top but gets caught by Edge. That doesn’t work either, as Styles slips out and kicks the bad knee, setting up a torture rack spun into a powerbomb for two more. Edge is back up but charges into a German suplex to put them both down again. They slug it out until Styles manages a Pele Kick but the Calf Crusher is blocked again.

The Crossface has Styles in big trouble until he rolls his way to freedom. The Edge-O-Matic gives Edge two and a slingshot powerbomb gets the same. They both take their time getting up and head to the corner, where Styles superplexes him down onto the apron (ouch). Back in and the springboard 450 hits Edge’s back for two. The Phenomenal Forearm and spear both miss so Styles hits the Styles Clash for a rather near fall. Styles loads up the Phenomenal Forearm….but Damien Priest (US Champion at the time) is here to offer him a distraction. The delay lets Edge spear Styles out of the air for the pin at 24:26.

Rating: B. This was a good, hard hitting match that felt like it belonged on the big stage, but the double downs got a bit repetitive as they probably burned off five minutes of just laying on the mat. The distraction finish was a bit annoying as well as it just cut everything else off, but it certainly seemed to set up something for the future. Either way, best match of the night so far.

Tonight’s attendance: 78,354.

Byron Saxton replaces Pat McAfee, who has to get ready for his match with Austin Theory.

Brawling Brutes vs. New Day

Butch is here with the Brutes. New Day has Big E. inspired gear, even down to the singlets, for a nice touch. Butch loses his mind on the floor before the bell and the brawl is on inside. The bell rings and Kofi hits Trouble In Paradise on Holland. Sheamus pulls Kofi outside though, leaving Woods to make a save. Back in and Kofi seems to leave a top rope shot to the face a bit short as Woods takes the straps down.

A running Downward Spiral hits Holland but Sheamus Brogue Kicks Kofi on the floor. Back in and Woods superkicks Holland (he’s taking a beating here)…but Sheamus Brogue Kicks Woods silly. Northern Grit finishes Woods at 1:42. So Big E.’s career might have been ended and his team loses in less than two minutes at Wrestlemania. This place isn’t nice to New Day (as they lost to the League Of Nations here in 2016 as well).

We look back at Cody Rhodes returning and facing Seth Rollins. These recaps might as well have a big sign saying FILLER. Or PEACOCK COMMERCIALS.

The Hall of Fame class is honored again, with only Undertaker coming out in person. Undertaker comes out, waves, and that’s it. I’m not sure why this needed to happen two nights in a row and the way it happened again made me think it was going to be an angle but…yeah nothing, even after it goes on for a good while.

We recap Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory. McAfee talks about everything he has accomplished from the NFL to his talk show, but he has always been a fan who wanted to wrestle. He even trained to wrestle with Rip Rogers before he came to WWE so he has a background. Vince McMahon was a guest on the Pat McAfee Show and offered McAfee a chance for a match. This wound up being against Theory, who has tormented him ever since, with McAfee chasing after him and annoying McMahon in the process.

Austin Theory vs. Pat McAfee

Vince McMahon personally introduces Theory (as a future Universal Champion). McAfee on the other hand has the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders with him in an appropriate entrance. Some right hands have Theory in trouble early but he goes to McAfee’s throat to cut him down. A jumping back elbow has Theory down again as the fans are rather into McAfee. There’s a hurricanrana for two but Theory plants him and smiles down at Vince.

McAfee manages a quick suplex for a breather and Theory heads out to the apron. They head outside and McAfee grabs a headset to say hi to his parents before pouring ice over Theory. Back in and a heck of a Swanton misses for McAfee so Theory grabs a belly to back slam for two.

Theory goes up but McAfee catches him on top, only to be shoved off. That’s fine with McAfee, who does a pretty sweet moonsault to land on his feet. A jump up to the top (that was cool) sets up a top rope superplex (McAfee shouldn’t be this good this soon) for a delayed two on Theory. Back up and Theory gets in a shot and tries A Town Down, which is countered into a rollup to give McAfee the pin at 9:43.

Rating: B. This was a heck of a celebrity match as McAfee got to show off his athleticism (that jump to the top into the superplex was very good). McAfee is one of those guys who seems to just “get” wrestling and that is one of the most valuable things anyone can have. McAfee had to win after the build to the match and it was good stuff, as McAfee can talk and actually back it up.

Post match McAfee celebrates and Vince is ticked. Vince is so ticked….that he takes his jacket off (the place is VERY interested). The shirt comes off and Vince gets in the ring (Cole: “WHY IS THERE A REFEREE IN THE RING???”). It seems that we’re doing this but Theory jumps McAfee from behind. Let’s ring that bell.

Vince McMahon vs. Pat McAfee

McMahon clotheslines him at the bell and then does it again, earning a YOU STILL GOT IT chant. The stall is on but McAfee Colts Up but McMahon distracts the referee, allowing Theory to crotch McAfee against the post. With McAfee down, McMahon gets a Dallas Cowboys football and punts it into McAfee’s stomach for the pin at 3:44.

Rating: D-. So that’s how the crowd gets killed after being on fire from the McAfee match. One might think it would have been a better idea to put Theory over if they wanted to go this way, but seeing McMahon in the ring for (probably) one last time is a special moment. That being said, this wasn’t a match for the most part and the ending was awful, but what else were you expecting?

Post match Vince and Theory hug and Vince seems a big scared by Theory’s music playing. Then the glass shatters and Vince has a better reason to be afraid. Steve Austin comes out, beats up Theory, gives McMahon the all time worst Stunner (as Vince falls down both before and after) and drinks beer (good thing it was ready in case he made a surprise appearance) with McAfee. Then he Stuns McAfee, who probably could not be more thrilled.

We look at Bianca Belair’s marching band entrance before she won the Raw Women’s Title.

Wrestlemania XXXIX is in Los Angeles.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns in a World Title unification match. Reigns has been Universal Champion for a year and a Lesnar has held the title for about five minutes. Now they’re unifying them because Reigns vs. Lesnar must headline at least one major event every year until the end of time.

Universal Title/WWE Title: Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Winner take all and Paul Heyman is here with Reigns (the Usos come to the ring with him but head to the back before the match). Heyman and Lesnar handle the intros (Lesnar has done that a time or two) before the latter takes off his gloves to start the match. Reigns hammers away and drives him into the corner a few times without much trouble. Three straight suplexes have Reigns in trouble and a clothesline puts him on the floor. Heyman offers a distraction though (Heyman: “I’ve always loved you. It was Roman’s idea!”) and Reigns hits a spear through the barricade.

Back in and Reigns hits another spear for two and a pair of Superman Punches drop Lesnar again. Lesnar is right back up with five German suplexes but the F5 is countered into a Superman Punch. Another spear is countered into the F5 to give Lesnar two of his own as they’re firmly in their signature formula here. Another F5 is countered and Reigns drives Lesnar into the referee in the corner.

A low blow and belt shot give Reigns two and Reigns spears him from behind (ala Lashley about two and a half hours ago, which commentary does note) for the same. Reigns tries another spear but lands in the Kimura, sending Reigns to the ropes this time. Reigns can be heard telling Heyman that his shoulder is “out”, only to spear Lesnar down for the pin at 12:17 (Heyman looked stunned on the pin).

Rating: C+. Yes the action was probably better than that but I’m so completely done with caring about these two having their same match over and over. WWE treated these two as the biggest stars in the company for so long that this is the only way they can finish Wrestlemania. That doesn’t make it interesting though, as Lesnar didn’t feel like a threat and they did the same match they have done almost every time after their first. But hey, at least the ultra dominant Reigns is now even more ultra dominant right? To be fair that wound up working, but finding a better way there would have been appreciated.

Reigns celebrates and a lot of pyro ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a weird one as there are good things about the show, but a lot of it feels like they were trying to fill in time. Too many of the matches came off as things that they needed to do rather than things they wanted to do and it made things a lot less interesting than the previous night. The good stuff is good and it had some moments (one more time for Austin and McMahon, the Knoxville/Zayn stuff and the title unification) but it felt like a pale comparison to Night One, which isn’t something to brag about whatsoever. Not a bad show at all, but you might want to pick and choose.

Overall Overall Rating: B. The show overall is good, but more of the good comes from Night One, which had the action to go with the moments. If they wanted to balance it out a lot more, moving Cody’s return to the other night would have helped, as outside of the main event, the second night didn’t have the deepest lineup. It’s a rather good Wrestlemania overall, but man it feels like an eternity has passed in the last year. Night One is definitely worth a watch though, as it feels like a Wrestlemania. Balance it out a bit and cut down on Night Two (or give us one really long night) and it’s that much better, but this did work.

 

Ratings Comparison

RKBro vs. Street Profits vs. Alpha Academy

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Omos vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: D+
Redo: C-

Johnny Knoxville vs. Sami Zayn

Original: C+
Redo: B-

Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Natalya/Shayna Baszler vs. Carmella/Queen Zelina vs. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley

Original: D+
Redo: C

AJ Styles vs. Edge

Original: B-
Redo: B

New Day vs. Brawling Brutes

Original: N/A
Redo: N/A

Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory

Original: C+
Redo: B

Vince McMahon vs. Pat McAfee

Original: D+
Redo: D-

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: C+
Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C
Redo: B-

Overall Overall Rating

Original: B-
Redo: B

So the second night was mostly better across the board and then the overall overall rating is barely up? That’s a weird one, but this show was a better sit after a year away so maybe it does have some staying power.




Wrestlemania XL Night Two: They Warmed Up

Wrestlemania XL Night Two
Date: April 7, 2024
Location: Lincoln Financial Field, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Corey Graves
God Bless American: The War And Treaty

It’s time for the second half of the biggest show of the year and things are not looking great for our hero. Cody Rhodes and Seth Rollins lost to the Bloodline last night and that means Rhodes’ shot against Roman Reigns will be under Bloodline rules. That should make for a big main event and we have quite the stacked card to go along with the big one. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night One if you need a recap.

I was in attendance for this show, sitting in the upper deck with the entrance on my right.

Michael Cole recaps the main event situation and runs down the card. He also brings up that it isn’t as cold, which is absolutely true.

Meek Mill narrates the opening video, which is about finishing the story.

The War And Treaty sing God Bless America.

Here is Stephanie McMahon of all people to welcome us to the show, saying we are now in the Paul Levesque Era. She talks about being at the first Wrestlemania and asks if we’re ready.

World Heavyweight Championship: Seth Rollins vs. Drew McIntyre

McIntyre is challenging and is played to the ring by the Ulster Scottish Pipe Band while Rollins has the Philadelphia Mummers, a large group of musicians who are in outfits that might be even more outlandish than his own. CM Punk is the guest commentator and is in fine form, saying that if McIntyre has a pipe band, Punk has a pipe bomb. The bell rings and McIntyre hits a Claymore for two at five seconds in.

Rollins, whose knee is banged up from last night, rolls outside with McIntyre following to send him into the post. McIntyre grabs a fan’s phone and takes a quick picture before going outside to yell at Punk. That’s enough of a distraction for Rollins to hit a quick Pedigree on the floor. Back in and the Stomp gives Rollins two of his own as we are not even three minutes in yet.

Another Pedigree is countered with a backdrop and McIntyre hits the Glasgow Kiss. McIntyre tries another Claymore but gets countered into the Pedigree. Rollins’ knee gives out so the followup Stomp only gets two and they both need a breather. Rollins goes up for a top rope stomp but only hits mat, meaning the knee is hurt again. The Futureshock gives McIntyre two so he yells at Punk and calls for a GTS.

Punk thinks that means McIntyre is putting the fans to sleep but Rollins slips out, only to get Claymored for two more. It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but the powerbomb is escaped. The Stomp onto the table connects and they head back inside where a quick Claymore gives McIntyre another near fall. Punk: “You gotta hit him with that GTS McIntyre!” Another Claymore gives McIntyre the pin and the title at 10:32.

Rating: B-. This was the kind of match that Brock Lesnar specialized in and it made sense for McIntyre to come out swinging like he did here. Rollins was banged up and just wrestled a long match the night before so testing him early was a good idea. There was zero reason for Rollins to keep the title here and it made for a great way to open the show, as a title change is always a big deal.

Post match McIntyre gets the big, emotional moment and goes outside to present the title to his wife. With that out of the way, McIntyre turns to Punk and goes over to talk some trash. Punk points out that he can’t hear anything McIntyre is saying with the headphones on so McIntyre tells him to suck it. That’s enough for Punk to sweep the leg and hit McIntyre in the head with his brace. I think you know what’s coming and indeed here is Damian Priest with the briefcase. That briefcase goes upside McIntyre’s head and it’s time to cash it in.

World Heavyweight Championship: Drew McIntyre vs. Damian Priest

Priest is challenging and wins in 10 seconds with South Of Heaven.

Post match Priest celebrates with Judgment Day as Punk applauds McIntyre in a great troll moment.

Bobby Lashley/Street Profits vs. Final Testament

Street fight with Snoop Dogg on commentary and Bubba Ray Dudley of all people as guest referee. B Fab, Paul Ellering and Scarlett are here too. It’s already time for a table to start, with Snoop saying it’s picnic time with Yogi Bear. The AOP cut off the Profits and the villains beat down Lashley with the kendo sticks inside. A neckbreaker onto a chair gives Kross two on Lashley with the Profits making a save. Dawkins gets powerbombed down but with B Fab having to make a save.

Back up and Lashley breaks up the Super Collider and takes Kross down with a Downward Spiral. Ford gets to show off with a big flip dive over the post to take out the AOP, leaving Lashley to beat on Kross with a chair. Scarlett breaks up the Hurt Lock so B Fab makes the save, including a Russian legsweep to drive Scarlett through the table at ringside.

Kross is back up with a Saito suplex to Lashley before putting him through a chair for two. That kickout doesn’t work for Kross, who yells at Ray, allowing the Profits to get back up for What’s Up. Ray even puts his glasses on and says GET THE TABLES. Kross is laid on the table, which immediately breaks. Therefore another table is brought in and the frog splash puts Kross through it to give Ford the pin at 8:34.

Rating: C. This feud wasn’t interesting coming in and the match didn’t make it that much better. It was two teams who didn’t have much going for them and their feud has gone on for a rather long time now. It also felt more like a way to get Dogg and Dudley out there, which actually might have been more interesting than the match itself.

The winners celebrate with Snoop Dogg.

We look at last night’s main event.

Paul Heyman more or less guarantees that Roman Reigns is winning under Bloodline Rules.

We recap LA Knight vs. AJ Styles. Knight is the new, brash talker who has the fans behind him but Styles doesn’t like him. Styles cost him in the Elimination Chamber and now Knight wants revenge in one of his biggest matches ever.

LA Knight vs. AJ Styles

Styles debuts new music here. They start the fight in a hurry until Styles misses a charge and crashes out to the floor. That lets Knight ram him into the announcers’ table over and over but Styles goes after the knee back inside. There’s a shinbreaker to keep Knight in trouble but he Russian legsweeps his way to freedom.

A springboard tornado DDT (that’s a new one) gives Knight two but Styles escapes a superplex. The belly to back faceplant gives Styles two so he goes up, only to have Knight catch him with the jumping German superplex to send Styles flying. That’s fine with Styles, who takes Knight down again and hits a baseball slide to drive the knee into the post.

They go outside where Knight gets in a posting and rips up the floor pad (you don’t see that much anymore), only to get dropped onto them. The count is beaten so Styles drops a springboard 450 for two. Back up and the BFT is countered into a rollup but the Styles Clash is blocked as well. Knight breaks up the Phenomenal Forearm and finishes with the BFT at 12:23.

Rating: B-. This might not have been a classic but it was around the level of a strong TV match. What matters most is Knight winning of course, as he has been needing that big win for a long time. Knight is someone who is going to be around for a bit and thankfully this gets his momentum back up. Styles seems like he is slowing down a good bit, though he’s still certainly good for a match like this.

In May, Smackdown and King/Queen of the Ring are both coming to Saudi Arabia. Much like last night’s Saudi moment, this wasn’t well received live.

We look at the Hall Of Fame 2024 class.

Here is the Class:

US Express (in Bray Wyatt shirts)
Thunderbolt Patterson (with Gerald Brisco)
Bull Nakano (nice reception)
Lia Maivia (represented by her daughter)
Muhammad Ali (not represented at all)
Paul Heyman (carrying Roman Reigns’ title and coming out to the old ECW theme)

WWE did community stuff this week.

We recap Logan Paul defending the US Title against Randy Orton and Kevin Owens. Paul is annoying, both guys want to beat him up and win the title. End of story.

US Title: Logan Paul vs. Kevin Owens vs. Randy Orton

Paul is defending and rides a big Prime truck to the stage, where he meets the Prime mascot. Owens on the other hand runs into Sami Zayn for a pep talk in the back. With that out of the way, Owens uses the golf cart he stole on Smackdown and even backs up to give Orton a (rather fast) lift. Paul bails straight to the floor to start but it turns out that a blond professional wrestler is easy to find at ringside during a wrestling match. Owens and Orton take turns sending him into the announcers’ table but Paul sends them into each other back inside. Paul: “Y’all fight!”

That doesn’t work either as Orton elbows Paul in the face and Owens adds a backsplash…but only one of them can cover. Owens and Orton slug it out until Paul cuts them both off with a double buckshot lariat. Paul mocks Orton’s pose before hammering away n Owens in the corner. The fans chant for various non-Prime beverages until Owens sends them both into the corner for a double Cannonball.

The Swanton hits Paul’s raised knees, allowing Paul to hit his own Swanton. Paul actually out uppercuts Orton, who comes right back with the snap powerslam. A double hanging DDT puts Owens and Paul down at the same time before taking Owens up top. That’s broken up by Paul, who gets caught with the spinning superplex. The moonsault hits Paul but Orton is right back with the RKO to Owens…for two. Now there’s something you do not see very often.

Paul finds the brass knuckles and clocks Orton with them….for two more. That’s another fairly nutty kickout and quite the stretch. Orton is back up (way too quickly after a brass knuckles shot) with an RKO to Paul but can’t cover. Instead he takes the knuckles away and tosses them but the Prime mascot pulls Paul outside.

The mascot is IShowSpeed, a video game streamer, so Orton RKO’s him onto the announcers’ table. Back in and Owens hits a pop up powerbomb on Paul and a Stunner to Orton for two. Another pop up powerbomb is countered into an RKO (that was sweet) but Paul shoves Orton outside and hits the frog splash to pin Owens at 17:38.

Rating: C+. This was a pretty long match and a rather formula based triple threat, which isn’t the best thing to see. The action was enough to keep it going, with that last RKO being quite impressive, but other than that, nothing stood out for the most part. I wasn’t exactly thrilled with this one and it should have been better than it was.

We recap Iyo Sky vs. Bayley for the former’s WWE Women’s Title. Bayley started Damage CTRL but Sky and the rest of the team seemed to dislike her. Then Bayley overhead them insulting her in Japanese and the whole thing fell apart. Now Bayley needs to prove she can do it herself.

WWE Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Iyo Sky

Bayley is challenging and has an ancient Egypt style entrance (yeah it’s weird) and what sounds like new music. Feeling out process to start with Sky grabbing the arm as they roll out to the floor. Sky gets back in and tries a dive but Bayley cuts her off again. Now Bayley hits her own dive but seems to come up favoring her knee. You can’t do that with Sky, who goes right after the knee to take over again.

A double stomp to the ribs gets one on Bayley and they head outside, where Sky goes to the barricade. The dive is pulled out of the air with a spinebuster but Sky catches her on top again. With Bayley knocked outside again, Sky hits the moonsault to send them both crashing onto the floor. Back inside and Bayley manages a sunset bomb into the corner for two but Sky’s bridging German suplexes gets the same.

Bayley avoids the Over The Moonsault but her top rope elbow only hits mat. Sky gets a crossface before switching over to STF. That’s broken up as well and the Bayley To Belly gives Bayley two. Sky is right back with a butterfly backbreaker and Over The Moonsault connects….for two. A bottom and middle rope moonsault connect for Sky but she misses the rope version. The Rose Plant is blocked so Bayley grabs a belly to back suplex and drops a top rope elbow. The Rose Plant connects this time to give Bayley the pin and the title at 14:23.

Rating: B. This did exactly what it should have done and somehow there was no interference. What mattered here was Bayley getting to show that she could do it on her own as she becomes a much more firm heroine again. This was a good match with Bayley fighting through the injury and even showing she can be something of a high flier in her own right. Heck of a match here and Bayley is back on top for the first time in a long time.

Celebrities are here.

The Philadelphia Eagles cheerleaders and Snoop Dogg are here to announce tonight’s attendance: 72,755, for a two day total of 145,298. That’s the two day total listed, but because it’s Snoop Dogg, he says 145,420.

We recap Cody Rhodes challenging Roman Reigns for the WWE Universal Title in the main event. Rhodes came up short last year but it is time for his second chance. He is completely up against the wall as it is Bloodline Rules, but Rhodes is fighting with a big purpose.

WWE Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Cody Rhodes

Rhodes, with Brandi Rhodes and wearing a skull mask as he comes up on the riser, is challenging and comes out to an absolute roar. Reigns is played to the ring by an orchestra, which is good, but doesn’t feel nearly as epic. We get the Big Match Intros to start and only Paul Heyman is here as a second. They stare at each other to start until Rhodes drives him into the corner to no avail. A running shoulder puts Rhodes down but Reigns doesn’t follow up, meaning we can reset a bit.

Reigns misses a charge into the post so it’s time to head outside. Rhodes grabs a table but Reigns gets in a cheap shot and puts it right back underneath the ring. Instead Reigns whips out a kendo stick and starts hammering away but Rhodes knocks it out of Reigns’ hands. A Figure Four has Reigns in trouble, which doesn’t last long as he gets to the ropes rather quickly. They fight into the crowd and onto a platform, where Rhodes manages a suplex.

Reigns is sent back to ringside and then counters the Disaster Kick with a hard powerbomb to put Rhodes in trouble again. The trash talk is on and Reigns grabs the cravate to keep Rhodes down. A PerfectPlex of all things gets two on Rhodes (McAfee: “I almost flipped my pencil.”) and Reigns fires off the corner clotheslines. Rhodes comes back with shots to the face of his own and they’re both down for a breather.

Back up and the slugout is on with Rhodes getting the better of things, setting up a powerslam. The Disaster Kick gets two but Reigns is back with his own Cross Rhodes for two. Reigns to Heyman: “I just wanted to shove it in his face.” Heyman: “I loved it.” The Superman Punch misses though and the Bionic Elbow puts Reigns down. They head outside again and let’s set up that announcers’ table again. The delay lets Reigns get in a low blow and he puts Rhodes through the table.

Back in and a Superman Punch gives Reigns two, followed by a Cody Cutter to give Rhodes the same. Rhodes hits a spear of his own for two more, followed by the Cross Rhodes. Cue Jimmy Uso and yeah you knew he was coming. Cue Jey Uso to go after Jimmy so they brawl on the ramp. That means Jey can hit a spear off the apron, sending them through some luckily placed tables. The distraction lets Reigns hit a quick spear for two, meaning frustration is setting in.

They guillotine choke goes on but they crash out to the floor for the break. Rhodes is up first and spears Reigns through the barricade for quite the twist on the move. Back in and a pair of Cross Rhodes connect for Rhodes until Solo Sikoa comes in with the Samoan Spike). The spear/Samoan Spike combination connects on Rhodes for two, leaving Sikoa annoyed.

Cue John Cena to take Sikoa outside for the AA through the announcers’ table. That brings out the Rock, who stares Cena down and immediately plants him with the Rock Bottom. Rock whips out the weightlifting belt….and the Shield’s music plays, with Seth Rollins sneaking in from behind with a chair. Not that it matters as Reigns Superman Punches him down. Then a gong strikes, the lights go out, and Undertaker is here. A chokeslam plants Rock and Undertaker disappears again. Reigns picks up the chair and goes after Rollins, allowing Rhodes to hit three straight Cross Rhodes for the pin at 33:34.

Rating: B+. Yeah he had to win the thing and there was no other option. Reigns had the title for over three and a half years and it was time for some fresh blood in there. The staggered interferences was a brilliant idea as it was one big reaction after another as the people kept stepping up to fight back against the Bloodline. The title change is what mattered though, as it was time for Reigns to lose the belt. I can’t say I see Cody as the long term star, but this absolutely had to be his moment and they nailed it.

Post match a bunch of wrestlers come out to celebrate with Rhodes, who wants a microphone. He praises Bruce Prichard and HHH for making Wrestlemania feel special before bringing both of them out. The big celebration wraps up up.

The highlight package finishes the show.

Overall Rating: B+. Maybe it was the warmer weather but this was a much more enjoyable time than Night One. It helped that it felt like so many things went down but they did a great job of making it feel huge. The cash in worked, Bayley won the title and Rhodes gets his big epic moment. That’s a heck of a way to use a night and WWE bounced back from a not so great Saturday. Awesome show here, as it feels we’re in a new era.

Overall Overall Rating: B. The best thing I can say here is that WWE finally pulled the trigger and finished Reigns. There are all kinds of things going on but that is the story that will be remembered on this show. The action was mostly good and it covered the biggest stories in WWE, with the main event being a total blast. Not an all timer, but the second night more than picked the first one up.

Results
Drew McIntyre b. Seth Rollins – Claymore
Damian Priest b. Drew McIntyre – South Of Heaven
Bobby Lashley/Street Profits b. Final Testament
LA Knight b. AJ Styles – BFT –
Logan Paul b. Randy Orton and Kevin Owens – Frog splash to Owens
Bayley b. Iyo Sky – Rose Plant
Cody Rhodes b. Roman Reigns – Cross Rhodes

 

 

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Wrestlemania XL Night Two Preview

So it’s time for Night Two and again we’ll do a quick one here as there is more than enough to talk about otherwise.

Seth Rollins b. Drew McIntyre. Yes that sounds insane and I hope I’m wrong but this feels like Priest’s time to cash in, either here or tomorrow night on Raw. That knee injury is too good to pass up and Priest doesn’t have the Tag Team Titles to worry about.

Logan Paul retains the US Title over Kevin Owens and Randy Orton. Paul is a star, Orton doesn’t need the title and Owens is better chasing the belt than holding it.

The Pride b. Final Testament. This should be fun but it needs to wrap up the feud once and for all. Lashley can Hurt Lock Kross to get rid of him and get a nice moment for a change.

LA Knight b. AJ Styles. Is there any reason to put Styles over here? Knight has been needing that big win for awhile now and while this might not be the biggest thing in the world, it’s certainly better than anything else he’s gotten.

Iyo Sky b. Bayley. You need a villain to win one of the bigger matches and this feels like the right spot. With Cargill, Belair and Naomi around, a heel champion makes more sense.

Cody Rhodes b. Roman Reigns. He has to, as this feels like the Assemble The Avengers moment with a bunch of people coming out to help FINALLY take Reigns out and end the Bloodline for good. Or at least knock them out of power.

Overall, this feels like the weaker of the two cards but it could be a lot worse. As usual, this is ALL about Reigns and whatever he is going to be able to do, as hopefully Cody can FINALLY finish the story and move on to something else already.




Wrestlemania XXXVII Night One (2022 Redo): I Remember Those People

Wrestlemania XXXVII Night One
Date: April 10, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 25,675
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Bebe Rexha

This is somewhere in between a Performance Center Wrestlemania and the regular version, as the show is taking place in front of a limited capacity audience. That alone is worth a look and now it is time for a Wrestlemania style show. The main event for the first night is Bianca Belair challenging Sasha Banks for the Smackdown Women’s Title. Let’s get to it.

No Kickoff Show matches (on either night) this year, which is a little weird to see.

The huge pirate ship set looks awesome, as WWE knows how to use what is available to them.

Here is Vince McMahon, with the roster behind him on the stage, to talk about how bad things have been over the last year. As we emerge from this pandemic, WWE would like to thank the fans for sticking with them and WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA! Very nice and you know it’s a big moment when the boss is out there for something like this.

Bebe Rexha, with a guitar player, singe America the Beautiful.

The opening video talks about how the WWE Universe has waited a long time to get back here, and now they are back for the spectacle and the passion. Wrestlemania is back in business (there’s a tagline for you). Tonight we will see an event that is bigger than the history of history.

That line is so bad that the voiceover from last year (with a bad Jack Sparrow impression) takes over to say this is a continuation from last year with wrestlers fighting for immortality. Now let’s drop some realness (as the kids say, because apparently kids say that), because tonight we continue a decades old spectacle.

That sets up the Wrestlemania highlight package, but first we need to thank the fans, including those in a commemorative chair or watching tonight on Peacock. The course has been corrected and this can’t be stopped. Sparrow voiceover: “Now how’s that for a cold open?” The original voiceover wants a big finish though so how about this: WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA!

Commentary welcomes us to the show….which is being delayed due to a weather delay, because of course it is. The fans bust out the ponchos and start heading for the concourses as this is quite the change of plans. With nothing else going on, commentary talks about Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley getting to start the show but since we have some time to fill, we’re going to get some special interviewers backstage.

Shane McMahon talks about how he hasn’t been bullying Braun Strowman and is ready to take him out tonight. MVP and Bobby Lashley interrupt to say that tonight will be the crowning moment of the Almighty Era. Drew McIntyre only understands violence and tonight, Lashley is going to give him that. McIntyre pops in and says Mother Nature can’t save Lashley so let’s do it back here.

MVP and Lashley are taken out and McIntyre talks about how he is trying to keep his emotions together and won’t lose it last year. Last year they were at the Performance Center and he won the WWE Title, lost it for three weeks and got it back, but now the weather is trying to hold him back again. Lashley is losing the title tonight. You can tell that McIntyre isn’t comfortable improving.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about how important the show is.

New Day is fired up about having the crowd back and you can’t feel that feeling until you feel it. They accepted AJ Styles and Omos’ challenge because they are fighting champions and don’t care how big or phenomenal their challengers are. No one can hang with them and here is Big E. to glare at interviewer Kevin Patrick, plus hype up how great the rest of the team is. It nearly turns into a sermon, as Patrick seems a bit scared.

Cole dubs the show Wrestlerainia but seems to be alone in that one.

Braun Strowman says he’s ready to get out there and destroy Shane McMahon for the sake of everyone who has ever been bullied. This isn’t going to be pretty or technical, because Shane is going to be beaten into an inch of his life. Tonight, he’s proving that bullies do not win.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about Vince McMahon’s speech.

Kevin Owens, rocking that KO Mania V shirt, takes the microphone from Kevin Patrick to talk about his history with Sami Zayn. They have known each other for almost twenty years and they started wrestling each other all over. One time they wrestled each other in front of 23 people in Owens’ hometown. They went to New York City, to Peru and around the world, but in those twenty years, no two people were talked down to by “industry experts” like they were.

Now they are here and tomorrow night they get to do it again at Wrestlemania. It has never been this big or this important but this isn’t the Sami that he has known. That’s ok though, because in the end, this is Wrestlemania and it’s Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens. Tomorrow night, Owens is Stunning some sense back into Zayn and if Logan Paul wants to try something, he’ll be in the ring. To the point, eloquent, and it told the story of their match. This stuff can be done with zero scripting and if the people can handle that, I have no idea why they aren’t given the chance.

Michael Cole and Samoa Joe, in ponchos, hype up the show being on in less than five minutes. In a good note for the two of them, Byron Saxton’s microphone has died.

Bianca Belair isn’t nervous but she knows she is getting in the ring with Sasha Banks. Belair doesn’t run from competition so tonight, she is proving that she is the best. Not too bad here.

Seth Rollins can’t remember Kevin Patrick’s name (Rollins: “It’s Mike right?”) but he loves the chaos of Wrestlemania. He isn’t happy with hearing about Zazaro Swinging him a record number of times but it was probably to help Zazaro springboard to a new level. Tonight the clouds will clear and the sun will shine down on the new Mr. Wrestlemania.

Miz and John Morrison aren’t worried about Bad Bunny and Damian Priest because they’re stars. BE JEALOUS!

The Kickoff Show panel gives us one more quick hype.

Now this is kind of interesting, because the Peacock version of the show has the weather delay with the promos as its own video (which is billed as the start of the show). Vince’s speech and America the Beautiful are on the regular video of the show and there is no mention of the delay, though the video with the delay references Vince’s speech. Because WWE.

Speaking of Because WWE, the opening video is on both the weather delay video and the regular Wrestlemania video.

Since we can’t just GET ON WITH IT ALREADY (and because the fans need to get back in their seats), here are hosts Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan, with the latter not getting the most positive reaction. Titus is fired up to be in his hometown and the WWE Universe is bringing the energy that they need. After one year, one month and one day, we are back live! Hogan doesn’t think the fans heard him so Titus says it again to a stronger reaction. They hype up the opening match with the Hurt Lock vs. the Claymore and wonder what happens when the Hulkamaniacs run wild for TWO NIGHTS!

We recap Bobby Lashley defending the WWE Title against Drew McIntyre. Miz cashed in Money in the Bank against McIntyre and won the title, only to lose it to Lashley eight days later (which was about as obvious of a result as you could have, as there was no way Miz was going to Wrestlemania as champion). McIntyre is getting his rematch, with Lashley trying to have the roster take McIntyre out before the show. That didn’t work, and now it is time for the showdown.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley, with MVP, is defending. They fight over the power lockup to start until Lashley runs him over with a shoulder. The overhead belly to belly works a bit better for McIntyre, who throws in a bit of a crude gesture. Some shoving goes to McIntyre but Lashley hits him in the face to cut that off. A running clothesline takes Lashley to the floor, where he is fine enough to drive McIntyre into the barricade a few times.

Back in and a neckbreaker gives Lashley one (because McIntyre doesn’t wait for two) before he sends McIntyre into the corner. The charge takes too long though and the arm goes into the post. A Codebreaker to the arm sets up a failed cross armbreaker attempt so McIntyre goes with some clotheslines instead. There’s the overhead belly to belly and then another one has Lashley in more trouble (as we see commentary standing at ringside for some reason, likely weather related).

The Futureshock is blocked though and Lashley hits the spinning Dominator for two of his own. McIntyre gets planted with the big spinebuster for two more but he’s right back with the reverse Alabama Slam. They go up top with the superplex being broken up so McIntyre puts on a Kimura up there instead. Lashley knocks him out so McIntyre does the situp toss back down (that always looks cool).

Back up and Lashley hits another spinebuster but, after a few seconds (good), McIntyre nips up for the staredown. Another belly to belly sends Lashley down again and now the Futureshock can connect. McIntyre isn’t done though as he rolls two more Futureshocks for two so it’s time to load up the Claymore. Lashley bails outside to avoid the whole kick in the face thing, only to have McIntyre hit a big running flip dive to the floor to take out Lashley and MVP at the same time.

Back in and the Hurt Lock is blocked so Lashley sends him flying again with a suplex. The Downward Spiral looks to set up the Hurt Lock again but McIntyre rams him into the corner for the break. A third spinebuster is countered into the Kimura, which is broken up as well for another double knockdown. McIntyre wins a slugout but MVP offers a distraction, allowing Lashley to duck the Claymore. The Hurt Lock goes on and McIntyre is in trouble, with even the flip out of the corner not breaking it up. McIntyre finally passes out to retain Lashley’s title at 18:21.

Rating: B. This was the heavyweight slugfest style match as you had two big men beating on each other until one of them couldn’t keep going. It was hard hitting, it was a heck of a fight, and it was about who could stay on their feet. That’s how you open the show and it felt Wrestlemania worthy, even if the ending wasn’t the best thing. Heck of an effort here though and this one stuck with me even over the last year.

Titus O’Neil is backstage with the NWO (Hogan/Hall/Nash/Syxx) and offers them a spot on Ding Dong Hello. She’ll settle for a Too Sweet, but only Hall and Syxx take her up on it before leaving. I forgot how good Bayley was as a heel.

Tag Team Turmoil

Five teams and the winners get a Women’s Tag Team Title shot tomorrow night. Lana/Naomi are in at #1 (they both like to dance) and Billie Kay/Carmella (after Kay FINALLY found a partner to pay off her amazing resume deal) are in at #2, with Kay not being exactly great at trying to match Carmella’s more suggestive entrances (but there was nothing for her to do in WWE because reasons). Carmella takes Lana into the corner to start and beats her down, only to have Lana slip away from Kay.

The hot tag brings in Naomi for the pull someone’s face into the back of her tights (because WE’RE HAVING FUN) before handing it back to Lana. This proves to be a bad idea as Lana can’t time kicking Kay down so Kay rolls Naomi up (with an assist from Carmella) for the elimination at 2:19.

The Riott Squad (Liv Morgan/Ruby Riott) are in at #3 with Morgan kicking Kay in the face (take notes Lana). Kay manages to put her down in the corner so though so Carmella can do her moonwalk into the dropkick. That doesn’t last long as Morgan fights up and hits a Codebreaker, only to hold Kay on top. Riott adds a top rope backsplash for the pin at 4:58 (total) but Carmella superkicks Morgan down after the fall.

Dana Brooke/Mandy Rose are in at #4, with Mandy infamously slipping on the ramp (edited out here, because WWE doesn’t make mistakes). An early Blockbuster drops Dana but she’s right back with a running flip neckbreaker for two. Riott grabs a sunset flip for the same and it’s Morgan coming in to pick up the pace. A Codebreaker into the Riott Kick gets two with Brooke having to make the save.

Rose gets in a kick to the ribs in the corner though Rose slips on the middle rope. Brooke slaps Rose in a rather personal area for a tag (sure why not) before a superplex drops Morgan. Not that it matters though as Morgan reverses into a small package for the pin at 9:17. After the ring announcer says the Riott Squad was eliminated and then issues a correction, Natalya and Tamina complete the field at #5.

Morgan rolls Natalya up for two but it’s off to Tamina for a sitout powerbomb. Tamina gets taken into the corner though and it’s the Codebreaker into the backsplash for two, because Tamina doesn’t get pinned you see. The superkick sends Morgan outside and there’s the Hart Attack to Riott. The Sharpshooter is loaded up but Natalya hands it off to Tamina for the Superfly Splash and the final pin at 14:06.

Rating: D. Egads man. The Women’s Tag Team Titles have been good for about three months out of the nearly three years they have been around and that is the case again here. Natalya and Tamina are about as interesting as the dogcatcher and the The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County, but they need to go over the Riott Squad, Kay and Brooke/Rose, because of course they do. This match was frustrating and bad on top of that, as you have a bunch of thrown together teams (and the Riott Squad) fighting for a shot against another thrown together/oddball team. Just drop the titles already.

Get vaccinated!

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro. Rollins got swung around a bunch of times so he pointed out that Cesaro had never had a Wrestlemania Moment (whatever definition we’re using for it this year) in the form of some campaign ads of who you should approve of more. The match was set up as a result, with Cesaro wanting his big shot.

Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro

Cesaro hits a running uppercut to start and knocks Rollins to the apron for a bonus. There’s a knee lift but Rollins snaps the arm across the top rope to take over. Back in and Cesaro’s superplex is countered into a Buckle Bomb for two as Rollins turns up the sneering. The top rope superplex into the Falcon Arrow gives Rollins two but Cesaro is back up with another uppercut.

The Swing (you knew that was coming) sets up the Sharpshooter but Rollins makes the rope. Rollins drops him again and hits a corkscrew frog splash (that’s a new one) for two of his own. Cesaro is right back up with a Neutralizer for two, setting up the shocked kickout face. Another attempt is countered into a quick Pedigree to give Rollins his own near fall and they’re both down (as long as he doesn’t start countering Pedigrees, we should be ok).

Rollins shouts about how he survived the Neutralizer and the Swing, setting up a missed running kick to the face. That’s fine with Rollins, who swings his leg back and kicks Cesaro in the back of the head instead (cool). The Stomp is countered into the uppercut so now it’s the torture rack swing (with no hands, because THAT’S SOMETHING ELSE HE CAN DO). The 23 rotation Swing sets up another Neutralizer for the pin on Rollins at 11:27.

Rating: B-. They got the result right as there was no way Cesaro was coming back from losing after everything Rollins said about him. The problem is that if this was going to mean anything, it needed to come about six years earlier. I’m happy to see Cesaro get his win, but it’s really hard to buy that it is going to mean anything beyond maybe the next few weeks. Good match though, which shouldn’t be a surprise given who was in there.

We look at Jey Uso winning the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal, plus Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler retaining the Smackdown Tag Team Titles, last night on Smackdown.

Ziggler and Roode pick AJ Styles and Omos to take the Raw Tag Team Titles from New Day.

Raw Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. AJ Styles/Omos

New Day (Xavier Woods/Kofi Kingston) is defending and this is Omos’ in-ring debut. Kofi and Omos start but Woods chants at Styles and gets him to start instead. Styles can’t get the Calf Crusher early on so they trade rollups instead. A belly to back suplex sends AJ face first onto the mat and it’s time for some Francesca from Woods. That’s enough for Woods to come in and grab a headlock, allowing him to shout about how they are cutting the ring in half. Styles fights up and tries to get over for the tag but Woods realizes that could cause a variety of damage.

Woods drags him back to the corner before sending Styles to the floor, setting up a dropkick through the ropes. Kofi keeps Styles down and a springboard splash to the back gets two. UpUpDownDown is loaded up but Styles kicks his way out and crawls over to Omos for the tag, despite Woods’ protests.

The tag brings in Omos (Kofi: “YOU GOT THIS WOODS!”) and Woods’ kicks have no effect. Kofi’s top rope chop is pulled out of the air and a backbreaker has Woods’ back bent over Omos’ knee. A side slam drops Woods again and Styles comes back in with a Phenomenal Forearm off of Omos’ shoulders to knock Woods silly as this isn’t going well for the champs. A standing Sky High sets up the pin with one foot to finish Kofi for the titles at 9:45.

Rating: C. The match might not have been the best, but the story it told worked well. What mattered here was having Omos look like an unstoppable monster and they nailed every bit of that side. What they didn’t nail was the part where Styles, who could probably beat either member of New Day with a limited amount of trouble, was treated like Jesse to Omos’ Festus. The Omos stuff worked, but the Styles half really didn’t work.

Styles sits on Omos’ shoulders for the cool visual after the match.

GET VACCINATED!

The cage is lowered.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman. Shane decided that Strowman was stupid and bullied him for the beat you over the head story of the show. Then Shane slimed him (as poured green goo over him) but their match at Fastlane was postponed to here due to Shane’s knee injury. This story was dumb and designed to put the focus on Shane, because of course it was.

Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman

Inside a cage with pinfall, submission or escape and Jerry Lawler joins commentary. As Lawler makes every joke about Strowman being stupid that he can think of, Jaxson Ryker and Elias (Shane’s goons) jump Strowman with chairs on the floor. A chair is thrown in with Strowman so the beatdown can be on. Strowman takes the chair away but Shane kicks him in the leg and takes over again because he’s Shane McMahon.

Shane’s escape attempt doesn’t work so he punches and kicks Strowman down in the corner. Another escape attempt is broken up but this time Shane pulls a piece of sheet metal off the top and beats Strowman down with that instead. Strowman fights up again and hits him in the face, with Shane being nice enough to sell for a few seconds. The running powerslam is loaded up but the knee gives out, allowing Shane to send him face first into the cage.

A DDT drops Strowman and Coast To Coast hits Strowman in the ribs. Shane goes for the climb so here are Ryker and Elias to help him over but Strowman knocks them off the cage. That makes Shane fall back inside too but of course he’s fine enough to get up again. This time Strowman follows, only to find a well placed toolbox (at least there would be a reason to have that up there) and knock Strowman off.

That’s enough for Shane to get over the top, where Strowman grabs him by the hand and then rip the cage open (that’s a new one) to pull him back inside. Strowman pulls him to the top of the cage and throws him down for the huge crash. Instead of climbing out though, Strowman climbs down, gives a speech about how this is for everyone who has ever been called stupid. The running powerslam finishes Shane at 11:26.

Rating: D. I for one enjoyed seeing the Shane McMahon Show here, as this was giving me Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax at Wrestlemania XXXIV vibes. This should have been Shane getting in a few shots off the interference and then being crushed like an old can. Instead, it was Shane beating on Strowman and getting in all of his stuff before Strowman beat him up to win. As usual, it was about Shane first and then everyone else, because that’s the Wrestlemania tradition we need to continue.

Here are some fireworks as the cage is raised.

Commentary talks about the Hall of Fame induction but Bayley interrupts, saying she can do Cole’s job better. She throws us to the induction ceremony video, with various people talking about how great this is.

Here is this year’s class:

JBL (long overdue)

William Shatner (not here but at least he did some stuff in wrestling before)

Bella Twins (who can’t quite do their dance in those dresses)

Jushin Thunder Liger (not here but he should be in every Hall of Fame)

Titus O’Neil (Warrior Award, as the man is a saint)

British Bulldog (again, how was he not already in)

NWO (yeah they’ll do as headliners)

Wrestlemania XXXVIII is in Texas.

Bad Bunny/Damian Priest vs. Miz/John Morrison

Booker T. is on commentary. Bunny is one of the hottest rappers in the world and a lifelong WWE fan. He performed his song about Booker T. so Miz and John Morrison wanted some collaboration. That wasn’t happening, so they broke his DJ’s equipment. Bunny eliminated them from the Royal Rumble and then picked up Damian Priest as a partner, setting up the big showdown. Miz and Morrison also destroyed Bunny’s really expensive car to make it…well material rather than personal in this case.

As for tonight, an army of bunnies hop to the ring, albeit with ears (and a head) falling off, leaving the rest of them to hold their big bunny heads on, because that’s how WWE does things. Miz and Morrison show up to do their Hey Hey Hop Hop rap live, which was a catchy song. On the other hand, Bunny rides into the stadium on the top of a semi truck for a pretty cool entrance.

Priest backs Miz into the corner to start but Miz wants Bunny instead. That’s exactly what he gets, with Bunny looking more comfortable than I would have expected. Miz sticks his chin out so Bunny hits him in the face (Morrison: “Rabbits are lucky! That was luck!”) before another right hand knocks him into the corner. The frustration is on so Bunny tackles him down and hammers away. Miz gets a bit more serious but this time Bunny grabs an armdrag.

Morrison isn’t happy and tells Miz to act like they’re the best tag team of the 21st century. A rather spinning headscissors takes Miz down again so Morrison comes in for a change. That means a headbutt to send him into the corner and a running elbow….is elbowed out of the air to put Bunny in trouble for the first time. The pace slows down a bit as Miz gets to mock Bunny and then rip at his face. Bunny fights out of a chinlock but Miz hits the big boot to cut him off again.

Another shot knocks Bunny to the floor and Morrison busts out a Spinarooni, meaning Booker gets in his catchphrase. Priest makes the mistake of looking at the crowd and gets knocked down by Miz, allowing Bunny to get dragged back into the corner. Bunny gets a boot up in the corner though and a tornado DDT out of the corner gives him a breather. That’s enough for the tag to Priest to start cleaning house, including the toss suplex to send Miz into Morrison.

The South of Heaven chokeslam gets two on Miz as everything breaks down. Stereo head claps set up stereo Broken Arrows for two on Miz and Morrison with the villains rolling outside. Of course that means the big dive from Bunny but Priest gets knocked down back inside. Morrison pulls Bunny to the floor, where Bunny hits a Canadian Destroyer to leave Miz stunned. Back in and a Doomsday crossbody finishes Miz at 15:03.

Rating: B. It was longer than it needed to be and Bunny selling the first ten minutes was certainly a choice, but this was WAY up there on the celebrity match list. Bunny clearly put in some effort and time as he looked good with the stuff he was doing out there. It was more him doing moves than wrestling a match but for a one off, this was a very successful debut. Bunny is the celebrity and is going to get the attention because he is the reason the match is taking place, but he more than delivered here and it was a very impressive showing.

We look back at Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley from earlier in the night.

Here’s what’s coming tomorrow night.

We recap Sasha Banks vs. Bianca Belair for the Smackdown Women’s Title. Belair won the Royal Rumble and gets to challenge for the title, with both of them talking about how they’re the rest best around here. This was a simple story but it was set up well, with Belair being treated as the next big thing but needing to conquer the current big thing.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Belair is challenging and we get the Big Match Intros. They fight over the lockup to start until Banks pulls her down, only to have Belair nip up. Belair takes Banks down instead but has to bail out of a standing moonsault. Banks sends her to the apron for a neck snap across the top and a ram into the post, setting up Banks’ big dive to the floor. That’s fine with Belair, who catches said dive and gorilla presses Banks for a walk up the steps (that’s not normal, at all).

Back in and Banks gets in a few shots of her own, setting up some rights and lefts on the mat. The double arm crank keeps Belair down so let’s hit the wide shot to show off the SNICKERS logos. Banks goes up top so Belair brings her right back down with the big crash. They head outside where Banks uses the hair to pull Belair into the post, only to miss the running knees against the barricade.

Back in and Belair grabs a VERY delayed suplex, complete with a slingshot and muscling Banks back up before taking Banks back for the double knockdown. Banks is up first and grabs the hair, which is used to pull her into a clothesline from Belair. A standing shooting star hits Banks and a release Glam Slam drops her again. Belair’s 450 only hits knees though and they’re both down again. Back up and Belair is fine enough to hit a pair of powerbombs for two, meaning they’re down again.

This time it’s Banks up first with a double springboard tornado DDT (that was cool), with the kickout leaving her stunned. The frog splash (with Cole thinking it was a Meteora) gets two on Belair and now frustration is setting in. They head outside with Banks sending her into the steps before taking it back inside for the Bank Statement. Belair looks more scared than hurt and it’s made even worse as Banks rolls into the middle. You don’t do that to Belair, who rolls forward to make the ropes for the break.

Belair drives her into the corner with straight power but can’t hit a Stratusphere. Instead Banks gets her into the Tree of Woe but misses the Alberto double stomp. Now Belair can hit her 450 for two, meaning it’s her time to scream in shock. The KOD is loaded up but Banks sticks the landing, so Belair is done playing. The big whip with the hair rocks Banks and now the KOD gives Belair the pin and the title 17:27. Ignore Cole shouting about a kickout.

Rating: B. There was a lot more laying around in this one than I thought but they did a good job with Banks’ natural skills vs. Belair’s power/athleticism. This was making me think of Asuka taking the NXT Women’s Title from Bayley back in 2016, as Bayley was great but Asuka was that much better and overwhelmed her. Very good match and the first time a women’s singles match has headlined the show to give it the historical aspect.

The big celebration is on to end the show, complete with Belair’s family in the front row for a nice touch.

Overall Rating: B-. Overall the show is good, but there are some rather part parts that hold it back. You can only get so far with stuff like the Tag Team Turmoil match and the cage match, which both dragged on and didn’t seem to be the hottest stories in the first place. Other than that, it is the same problem as last year: having the show split in half takes away the feeling of this being the biggest show of the year. I get why they’re doing it, but egads it doesn’t feel as special. The good matches here are more than enough to carry it, but this is far from a classic.

Ratings Comparison

Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: B-

Redo: B

Tag Team Turmoil

Original: D

Redo: D

Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

Redo: B-

AJ Styles/Omos vs. New Day

Original: C+

Redo: C

Braun Strowman vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

Redo: D

Miz/John Morrison vs. Bad Bunny/Damian Priest

Original: C

Redo: B

Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Almost everything is about the same save for Bad Bunny/Priest, which is better than I remembered.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXV (2020 Edition): It Does Help Things

Wrestlemania XXXV
Date: April 7, 2019
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 82,265
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips
America the Beautiful: Yolanda Adams

We’re back to this show after a year away and I’m not sure what to think about this one. I wasn’t in the stadium for this one and for once that is making me remember the show a little bit better. This whole thing is centered around a few matches, as Wrestlemania always tends to be. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Buddy Murphy vs. Tony Nese

Murphy is defending and this is during Nese’s (who won a tournament to get here) not so great face run. First good thing: there are a bunch of people in their seats already so the place doesn’t look ridiculous. Murphy misses a running knee at the bell so Nese hammers away in the corner and tells the fans that this is his Wrestlemania moment. A cartwheel off the apron lets Nese hit him in the jaw but Murphy grabs a fireman’s carry drop onto the corner (Colt Cabana’s Chicago Skyline) as we take a break.

Back with Murphy holding a chinlock but getting suplexed into the corner to cut things off. Some running elbows to the face rock Murphy and the Lionsault, with Murphy hanging in the ropes, gets two. Nese catches him on the ropes with a palm strike, only to get pulled into a Cheeky Nandos kick. A powerbomb into a spinning faceplant gives Murphy two as we get the “still filing in line” from commentary. Murphy’s Law is countered and Nese hits a reverse hurricanrana to put them both down again.

Murphy wins a strike off but Nese is right back with a sunset driver for his own near fall as the fans are finally getting into this. The running Nese doesn’t get to launch so Nese hits the Fosbury Flop instead. Back in and the 450 gets two in a surprising near fall. The jumping knee connects out of nowhere and Murphy’s Law gets two as Nese gets a foot on the rope. Ever the villain, Murphy tries his own running Nese, which is cut off by a superkick. The real running Nese finishes Murphy at 10:44.

Rating: C. The 205 Live guys had several matches that would blow this one away but at least they had a nice moment in the end with the fans getting into things. Nese as a face didn’t exactly click but beating Murphy felt like a bit deal. It’s a nice mini feel good moment to start what is going to be a long night.

Kickoff Show: Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Zelina Vega, Kairi Sane, Ember Moon, Liv Morgan, Sarah Logan, Ruby Riott, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Maria Kanellis, Asuka, Sonya Deville, Candice LeRae, Naomi, Nikki Cross, Lana, Dana Brooke, Mickie James

Only Naomi and Asuka get entrances. Nikki goes nuts to start and it’s a big brawl, as a battle royal should be. Maria is out in a hurry and Asuka knocks out Candice and Nikki back to back. Ember and Naomi trade hurricanranas until the former hits a quick springboard Eclipse on Lana. Another Eclipse gets rid of Naomi and there’s the real version to Mandy. Ember goes up again but Lana (the one in the designated Captain Marvel attire) shoves her out.

Sane hits an Alabama Slam on Lana and goes up like a schnook, only to get shoved to the apron by Logan. Even the bigger schnook, Logan doesn’t eliminate her but rather joins the rest of the Riott Squad to go after Lana. The elimination doesn’t take long but Sane drops Logan. The Insane Elbow connects, only t have the Squad get together and eliminate Sane without much trouble. An assisted flipping Stunner rocks Vega but AGAIN Logan doesn’t get the elimination.

Instead the Squad goes after Asuka and again they don’t eliminate her. Brooke gets to fight off all three of them and manages a slow motion Thesz press on Morgan. Riott goes after Brooke and gets tossed, with Morgan following her out. Brooke’s handspring elbow hits Vega’s knees though and the running knees in the corner make it worse. Rose and Deville get rid of Vega and Brooke, meaning we can get a big hug.

We’re down to Rose, Deville, Asuka, James, Logan and Carmella, the latter of whom seems to be on the floor because that’s something you have to have in battle royals these days. James hurricanranas Rose to the apron and superkicks her out, only to get dropped by Deville. Asuka beats up Logan and Deville at once but she manages to toss Deville. Logan gets rid of Asuka but, say it with me, Carmella is still in and superkicks Logan out for the win at 10:33.

Rating: D. Holy sweet goodness I can’t stand that finish and yet we seem to get it in every few battle royals (including last year’s women’s battle royal). I know Carmella getting the win is for the sake of the New York fans but egads this feels like a waste of a match, which tends to be the case with so many of these pre-show battle royals. In other words: more of the same stuff that wasn’t good in the first place.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Revival is defending and picked the match because they thought it would be an easy win. See, Hawkins hasn’t won a match in two and a half years so of course he gets a Wrestlemania title shot (you have to keep the New York crowd happy you see). Dawson shoves Hawkins down to start and then pats him on the cheek in the corner. We get a recap of the Edgeheads as Dawson headlocks Hawkins down.

Ryder comes in as we hear about how the show in “the shadow of New York”, which is acknowledged as New Jersey, likely for one of the only times tonight. A middle rope missile dropkick puts Wilder down but Dawson low bridges him out to the floor. Something close to a top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two and the armbar goes on. Dawson comes back in and rips at the face before working on his own armbar.

That’s enough of that so Wilder grabs another armbar (he’s up 2-1 on Dawson) to keep Ryder down. Ryder fights up again but neckbreakers his way out of a double suplex. With Hawkins being distracted, the champs cheat to set up a hard clothesline for two more. The assisted legdrop gives Wilder two and we hit the chinlock as this keeps going. Ryder finally suplexes his way to freedom and there’s the hot tag to Hawkins.

House is cleaned until it’s a double clothesline to put Hawkins and Dawson down at the same time. The middle rope Rough Ryder hits Dawson but Ryder and Wilder crash out to the floor. Wilder saves Dawson at two and tornado DDTs Ryder on the floor. A brainbuster drops Hawkins outside as well and they’re all down for a bit. Back in and Hawkins is dead but manages a small package for the pin and the titles at 13:20. Hawkins slowly realizing that not only is the match over but that they won is kind of awesome.

Rating: D+. This went on too long but the ending was fine after setting everything up for so long with the losing streak. Hawkins and Ryder are a likable team so it’s not like them winning the titles is a bad idea. Besides, WWE has already taken away anything that the Revival could offer (and yet it would still get worse) so the loss doesn’t do a ton of damage to them anyway.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Otis, Karl Anderson, Andrade, Gran Metalik, Chad Gable, Heath Slater, Bo Dallas, Colin Jost Jeff Hardy, No Way Jose, Lince Dorado, Bobby Roode, Konnor, Tyler Breeze, Viktor, Luke Harper, Ali, Apollo Crews, Michael Che, Titus O’Neil, Tucker, Braun Strowman, Shelton Benjamin, Jinder Mahal, Matt Hardy, Curtis Axel, Rhyno, Luke Gallows, EC3, Kalisto

So the big deal here is Jost and Che are from Saturday Night Live and Strowman doesn’t like them. The two of them bail to the floor and hide under the ring as Axel is out in about ten seconds. Dorado takes a SCARY bump to the floor with Breeze, EC3 and Benjamin following him out. There goes Dallas as well but it’s time for a staredown with Strowman and Harper.

That’s broken up in a hurry and Titus gets rid of Slater. As expected, Titus is out a few seconds later off a missed charge and Ali gets rid of Jose. Ascension sends Strowman shoulder first into the post for a crash to the floor (through the ropes so no elimination). Anderson isn’t so lucky as he gets tossed and the Hardys do the same to Rhyno. Roode and Metalik are out next as the ring is starting to empty a bit.

Andrade tosses Kalisto onto Metalik but Gable rolls Andrade with German suplexes. Since it’s Gable though, Andrade throws him out in a hurry, leaving Otis to hit a double Caterpillar on the Ascension. They’re both out as well but Strowman is back in to get rid of Gallows, Tucker and Otis in a row. There goes Mahal as Harper tries to suplex Ali over the top. With Ali hanging upside down, Strowman kicks Harper out, nearly dropping Ali on his head in a very near miss.

We’re down to Strowman, Andrade, Matt, Jeff and Crews in the ring with Che and Jost still underneath the ring. Andrade and Crews go to the apron and Andrade tries a hurricanrana for no intelligent reason in a double elimination. Strowman puts the Hardys on the apron in the battle of North Carolina as Che and Jost get back inside. They can’t get rid of Strowman, who dumps the Hardys and is ready for the destruction.

Jost grabs a mic though and says this doesn’t need to end in violence. He presents his personal therapist, whose breathing exercises earn him a chokeslam. Che tries to eliminate himself but Strowman punches himself out instead. Strowman misses a charge and almost gets eliminated but powers through it and tosses Jost for the win at 10:27.

Rating: D+. Yeah it’s stupid and the SNL guys added nothing to the whole thing but Strowman won in the end and there were some nice spots (granted they went with some scary ones) throughout. It isn’t anything better or worse than your usual “get them all in there” battle royal and it could have been worse. That’s high praise for something like this anymore.

And with that Smackdown length Kickoff Show out of the way, we can get on with the real show. Isn’t modern WWE great?

Yolanda Adams sings America the Beautiful and we get the big helicopter flyover.

The opening video, complete with a WWE Presents, features the wrestlers talking about how Shakespeare said all the world’s a stage. Tonight, this is their stage and they are the players. We get the classic moments of course because this show is built around history. They do a good job of starting this slowly and then building it up into a big feeling. As usual, WWE’s promo videos are nothing short of incredible and somehow they manage to get better a lot of the time. That being said, wrestlers calling themselves storytellers doesn’t sound right.

Maybe it’s how many times I’ve heard the song on highlight packages since then, but that Love Runs Out theme song is really catchy.

Here’s Alexa Bliss, the host for the evening, to open things up. Bliss talks about how this show needs a goddess and if she snaps her fingers, she can make a Wrestlemania moment. A snap of her fingers produces Hulk Hogan, who is happy to be back here in the Silverdome. That gets a chuckle so then he calls it the MetLife Center in a joke that doesn’t go over as well. Hogan and Bliss pose together in a cute moment.

Hold on though as Paul Heyman storms out and says we’re doing the Universal Title match RIGHT NOW. The faster Lesnar wins, the faster he can go to Las Vegas where he is ULTIMATELY appreciated.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is defending after winning the Royal Rumble and gets a big BEAST SLAYER intro. At least BURN IT DOWN gets a big reaction so they’re doing something right. Lesnar jumps him before the bell and knees Rollins off the apron. An F5 plants Rollins on the floor and a hard whip into the barricade makes it even worse. Rollins gets tossed over the announcers’ table as the beating is on in a big way. That’s not enough for Lesnar so he throws Rollins over another table before throwing Rollins inside.

Heyman and Lesnar talk the angry trash but it’s back to the floor before the opening bell. Cole: “Seth Rollins never had a chance!” And there’s your usual WWE line that gives away the ending. Brock throws Rollins over the announcers’ table for a third time and then through the cover of the announcers’ table. They go back in for the opening bell and there’s the first German suplex. Lesnar: “SUPLEX CITY B******!” Give him his t-shirt money.

The second suplex sends him flying again as Cole brings up the Wrestlemania XXXI cash-in. The F5 is countered though and Rollins gets in a low blow. That means a low superkick and three straight Stomps make Rollins champion at 2:30. It was an exciting start and the whole thing from Lesnar’s first attack ran about 7:00. They had to get the title onto Rollins here (though more importantly off of Lesnar) and this was certainly a memorable way to do it. Certainly more so than when they did it again in a longer form four and a half months later.

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

This is your “here are two big names without much else to do” match. Orton eliminated him from the Elimination Chamber and they got in an argument about who built Smackdown. Orton’s big CGI snakes really don’t look great but those things are hit and miss for everyone. AJ headlocks him to start and is promptly driven into the corner. A very early threat of an RKO sends AJ bailing to the corner and it’s another standoff.

Orton pokes him in the eye and hits a dropkick to take over, including a boot across the eye to make it even worse. AJ gets in his own dropkick though as they’re pretty even in the early minutes. With Orton taking a breather on the floor, AJ scores with the slingshot forearm, only to get knocked off the apron and hard into the barricade. Back in and the chinlock goes on as the fans start chanting something I can’t understand.

That’s broken up so AJ hits the sliding forearm, setting up the fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. An early Styles Clash attempt is countered into a powerslam to give Orton his own near fall as the slow pace continues. The Calf Crusher attempt is countered without much trouble but the second attempt is slapped on in the middle of the ring. Not that the fans are exactly interested but AJ did get it on. That’s broken up in a hurry so AJ heads to the apron for the Phenomenal Forearm.

Orton jumps up to RKO him out of the air (as he had done last week) but AJ holds back, leaving Orton to crash. The springboard 450 gets two but Orton is right back with the backbreaker. Orton’s rather good looking top rope superplex has AJ crashing down for two and an uppercut gets a crazy loud pop (that had to be for something else). The hanging DDT gets no reaction but Orton walking around does, as I’m almost scared to imagine what had the fans’ attention.

AJ hits an enziguri to block the RKO, only to walk into it on the second attempt. That’s only good for two as well and Orton is shocked. With nothing else working, Orton loads up a super RKO, which is escaped without a lot of effort. A Pele sends Orton to the floor and the Phenomenal Forearm knock him even sillier. Back in and Orton still can’t hit the RKO, meaning it’s another Phenomenal Forearm to give AJ the pin at 16:12.

Rating: C-. Things got a bit better by the end but it never got going at any intense level. These two are capable of a lot but it was rather slow paced for the most part and when the match is going that long, it can get pretty tiresome in a hurry. It’s not bad in any sense but it wasn’t exciting and you know these two could do a lot better. That makes it more frustrating than anything else, as I kept waiting for them to get going and they never really did.

Here’s Lacey Evans to continue doing her thing of walking around, smiling, and then walking back.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Rusev/Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Bar vs. Ricochet/Aleister Black

The Usos are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. There is something so awesome about seeing the look on Ricochet’s face as he walks onto the stage. You can see what it means to him and there is no faking that kind of a feeling. This also marks Ricochet and Black’s third shot at different titles this week, after Raw and NXT title shots earlier in the week. Jimmy and Black start things off with a feeling out process until Sheamus tags himself in to face Black.

The armbar doesn’t last long as Rusev tags Sheamus and runs Black over. Nakamura comes in for a kick to the back but the rapid fire tags continue, with Jimmy coming in to Samoa drop Black. Nakamura kicks Jimmy into a tag to Ricochet, who does a very spinny headscissors on Cesaro. Since it’s just a headscissors though, Cesaro uppercuts Ricochet down and starts swinging him, as Sheamus forearms everyone else.

After a nearly 40 second swing (geez), the Sharpshooter goes on in the middle of the ring. Black makes the save and strikes away, setting up a springboard moonsault for two on Rusev. Nakamura is back in with some running knees to Black, meaning Ricochet has to make a save of his own. That earns him a swinging Rock Bottom from Rusev and it’s time for the nine man Tower of Doom. Just to show off, Ricochet flips out and lands safely in the corner, setting up the 630 for two on Sheamus. We hit the parade of kicks to the face with the Usos superkicking Sheamus down. The Double Us retains the titles at 10:05.

Rating: B. This was almost all action from bell to bell and that’s all you can do with a match like this one. Let them do whatever they want and get in spot after spot for a little while. They didn’t overstay their welcome either, as this match got in the right amount of time. Good stuff here and one of the more entertaining things all night so far.

Hall of Fame recap. Thankfully Bret being attacked isn’t mentioned whatsoever.

Here’s the class being presented in the stadium:

Honky Tonk Man (How was he not in yet?)

Harlem Heat (Perfectly fine.)

Torrie Wilson (The new low benchmark.)

Brutus Beefcake (Again, how was he not in yet?)

Hart Foundation (Should have been earlier so Neidhart could be there but long overdue as well.)

Sue Aitchison (Warrior Award.)

D-Generation X (I’m sure they had to twist their arms to get here. Deserved of course.)

We recap Miz vs. Shane McMahon. Somehow Shane won the World Cup despite not being in the tournament and Miz, the man he replaced in the finals, was jealous. Miz’s dad thought they should team together so they won the Tag Team Titles. The reign didn’t last long though and they split up, with Shane turning on Miz. Tonight, it’s Falls Count Anywhere. This was in the middle of Shane’s RIDICULOUS run near the top of Smackdown where he was all over the show and beating main eventers, including that Tag Team Title win. Of course he gets a big Wrestlemania match, because that’s what makes sense for such a star.

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Falls Count Anywhere, but hang on as Shane needs to hear his introduction three times in a row. With that out of the way, Shane bails to the floor at the bell so the chase is on, with Shane hitting his horrible punches. In a smart move, Shane grabs Miz’s dad (in the front row) and again, the chase goes badly for Miz as Shane hammers away. They head outside again with Shane loading up the announcers’ table.

A monitor shot to the head puts Miz on the table but Miz’s dad blocks the big elbow. Shane gets down so Miz’s dad gets inside for the showdown, with Miz’s dad doing the pose that launched a subplot on the upcoming season of Miz and Mrs. Shane takes him into the corner and stomps away, drawing Miz back in for the beating. They fight to to the floor with Shane falling over the barricade but hold on as Miz wants someone to check on his dad.

With the medics doing their job, Miz dives over the barricade to take Shane down again. They fight over towards one of the big pillars that holds up the canopy over the ring but Shane fights out of the Skull Crushing Finale. Instead Shane grabs a DDT for two but Miz kicks him down off the stage. Shane is sent knee first into a barricade and Miz beats on him with a chair to blow off some more steam.

They wreck announcers’ row with Miz throwing him over every chair he can find, plus throwing some chairs around. Shane gets sent through a table for two, followed by a monitor shot to knock him over a barricade and onto the top of a well placed golf cart. That gives Miz a delayed two so he punches Shane up towards a production tower. A Skull Crushing Finale onto the platform gets two, because he’s Shane and Miz is just a former World Champion.

Shane fights back (of course) and climbs up to the top of the tower. Miz pursues so Shane begs off, even dropping to one knee. That earns him some left hands to the head and Miz superplexes him all the way down (after asking if Shane is ready) onto a crash pad. Worry not though as Shane lands on top for the pin at 15:25.

Rating: D-. I knew the ending was coming here and I still shake my head at the ending. Shane is the boss’ son but my goodness how hard can you push him? The worst part is that it is only going to get worse as the summer goes on, but this was a punch to the gut as Shane wins AGAIN, meaning he isn’t going away anytime soon. The superplex was a nice idea but showing the landing on the pad (which just happened to be there) took away all of the impact that it had. That is, whatever was left before Shane won of course.

Paige joins commentary.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: IIconics vs. Beth Phoenix/Natalya vs. Nia Jax/Tamina vs. Sasha Banks/Bayley

Banks and Bayley are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Bret Hart is here with Beth and Natalya (who really feel like fill ins for Trish Stratus/Lita), though he doesn’t go beyond the stage. Tamina shoves Bayley down to start and superkicks Natalya for a bonus. Everything breaks down in a hurry with Nia being sent outside for a ram into the steps. Back in and Peyton rolls Sasha up for two and it’s a double kick to put drop Sasha again.

The Hardys’ Spin Cycle gets two on Banks but she’s right back with a backslide for the same. It’s back to Bayley for a sliding clothesline for two on Beth but Billie tags herself in. The IIconics take over on Beth, who is right back with a suplex to both of them at once. Natalya comes in for two but Bayley makes a fast save. The champs get in a fight with Beth and Natalya and it’s a Bank Statement to Phoenix. That’s broken up but the Glam Slam is countered into a rollup into the corner.

Natalya drops Sasha onto Bayley and they get the always fairly dumb looking double Sharpshooter treatment. This time it’s Tamina making the save and Nia comes back in to wreck everyone else. The IIconics get crushed with stereo Samoan drops but Beth shoves Nia off the top to break up a splash. Sasha takes Beth down as well and Bayley drops the top rope elbow, followed by Banks’ frog splash. The Tower of Doom is broken up so Beth hits a super Glam Slam on Bayley, with Kay making a blind tag. With Beth sent outside, Kay steals the pin and the titles at 10:47.

Rating: D. This went on too long and wasn’t all that interesting in the first place. The titles were brand new at this point and they already seemed pretty worthless, which would be proven over the next year. The fallout here is more interesting than the match itself, as you Nia would go away for about a year with double ACL surgery and Sasha (allegedly) threw a fit over losing and took the summer off.

The pilots from the Kickoff Show flyover are in the crowd. That’s always cool.

We recap Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan for the Smackdown World Title. Kofi replaced the injured Ali in the Elimination Chamber and got down to the final two. That set up one of the most dramatic things that WWE has ever done, as Kofi got inches away from winning the title and the fans ate it up. It was clear that Kofi had to get the title at Wrestlemania or he never would, which sent Kofi and New Day into a crusade to finally get the title shot that had eluded him for eleven years.

After jumping through all kinds of hoops set by Vince McMahon, it took New Day winning a gauntlet match to get the shot, with their longtime rivals the Usos stepping aside in a great show of respect for Kofi. At the same time, Bryan said that Kofi was a B+ player in an awesome role reversal from his legendary run five years earlier.

The match was finally set and it was a heck of a story, as Kofi had put in so many years of building credibility to get here and was finally cashing in. This wasn’t JBL jumping up to the main event scene, as Kofi had pretty much won every title other than the World Title. That’s not a big jump, but it was hard to believe that they would actually pull the trigger here. In other words, this was EXCELLENT and would have headlined any other year.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Kofi is challenging and has New Day in his corner, while Bryan has Rowan. Big E. has a gift for Kofi and promises it for after the match. I had forgotten how nice of a touch Bryan’s eco-friendly belt really was. They stare each other down to start and the fans are behind Kofi, which is almost hard to fathom until you realize that Bryan might be a better heel than face. Kofi’s headlock doesn’t get anywhere so they fight over a backslide. Bryan monkey flips him so Kofi lands on his feet, setting up a dropkick to the floor.

The big dive takes Bryan down again and the roster is behind Kofi in the back. Things slow down a bit as Bryan needs a breather with Rowan. Back in and Bryan uppercuts him a few times to set up the surfboard, which always looks awesome. That’s broken up in a hurry as usual, allowing Kofi to kick away in the corner. Bryan’s moonsault into the running clothesline is countered into something resembling the standing double stomp (almost a Thesz press as Kofi can’t hit it properly) for two.

Kofi’s jumping clothesline works a bit better and the Boom Drop connects. Bryan heads outside again so Kofi tries a springboard dive, which lands ribs first on the announcers’ table. You don’t have to ask Bryan twice to go after the ribs like that so he drops Kofi ribs first across the top rope. The ribs get sent into the corner and it’s off to a waistlock, which works a lot better this time around. Kofi fights up and elbows in the corner but a very quick Trouble in Paradise is countered into a Boston crab.

Bryan’s belly to back superplex is broken up with elbows to the face and Kofi hits a top rope splash to the back for two. They slug it out but Trouble in Paradise is countered again, only to countered into a small package to give Kofi two more. Kofi’s crossbody is rolled through though and Bryan pulls him into a failed LeBell Lock attempt so they’re both down for a second. The running knee is countered into the SOS but Bryan reverses into the LeBell Lock, with Bryan letting go for some more elbows to the ribs.

Kofi finally gets his foot on the rope and you can hear the sigh of relief. Bryan YES Kicks at the ribs even more but Kofi fires up and tells Bryan to kick him even harder. As Bryan backs away, Kofi throws his own kicks and busts out a reverse suplex for two. They head outside again so Rowan can go after New Day, earning himself Trouble in Paradise. The Midnight Hour on the floor takes care of Rowan and Kofi blocks Bryan’s suicide dive.

Back in and Bryan hits the running knee…..for two and a big pop on the kickout. Bryan has had it and unloads with stomps to the head to set up the LeBell Lock. Kofi breaks out again and blasts Bryan with forearms to the face with more aggression than you usually see from him. Bryan won’t let go of the wrist so Kofi stomps him right back, knocking Bryan silly. Trouble in Paradise gives Kofi the clean pin and the title at 23:45.

Rating: A. That is the definition of the Wrestlemania moment and it holds up to perfection a year later. The fans completely bought into the idea of Kofi fighting through everything and winning the title in the end and that’s all it should have been. Kofi is the kind of guy who has been around forever and built up so much good will that when he finally went after the title, everyone was on his side. That made for a special moment and it was amazing throughout as it’s something that I never thought I would see, but here it is. That’s a great thing to see as rare as it can be.

On top of that, this was an awesome match with both guys giving it everything they had. The story here was perfect with Kofi not being the wrestler Bryan was but knowing that this was his one shot and giving everything he had to achieve his dream when he could. The fans believed in him and there was no way he could lose in this spot. Outstanding stuff and if not for the historic main event, this would have headlined in a landslide. Watch this again and smile a lot.

Post match Woods and Big E. pull out the classic WWE Championship and hand it to Kofi for the first time (Kofi kneeling in the ring and waiting to have it presented to him is a great visual). The pyro goes off and Kofi’s sons get in the ring to celebrate with him and one of them holds up the title, which is almost bigger than he is. We’re not done yet though as Big E. brings in the present from earlier. It’s the first New Day shirt featuring Kofi as champion and his kids get to hold them up for a perfect visual. Woods: “THEY SAID WE COULDN’T MAKE IT! WE MADE IT TO THE TOP!” Outstanding.

Che and Jost are banged up so Bliss introduces them to Dr. Scott Hall and Dr. Kevin Nash. Ok then.

Booker T. is the next guest commentator.

US Title: Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is challenging and this year’s comic gear is…..well Mysterio appropriately enough. Now how did he never do that one before? Joe kicks him in the face but Rey is right back with the springboard hurricanrana. The 619 connects but Joe pulls him out of the air into the Koquina Clutch and Rey is out at 1:00, which may have something to do with Rey injuring his ankle on Monday. Booker being annoyed at wasting all the time on prep work is good for a chuckle.

Sneak peak of Batista’s new movie Stuber.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre. Reigns returned from leukemia after a four month absence and he needs a first victim. Drew has run through the rest of the Shield as a bonus. This is your likely layup result of the show and that’s fine.

Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre

Drew gets played to the ring by the New York Bagpipe Band. They trade shots to the face to start so Reigns snaps off a Samoan drop for an early two. McIntyre is right back with a spinebuster into a jackknife cover for two of his own. The Glasgow Kiss knocks Reigns down again and McIntyre throws him into the corner for two. The chinlock/armbar goes on until Reigns powers out and knocks him to the floor. Reigns’ running kick to the face is blocked though and McIntyre suplexes him down.

Back in and the reverse Alabama slam gives McIntyre two so he takes Reigns up top. That earns him a crotching, only to have Drew pull himself up from the Tree of Woe to send Reigns flying with a belly to belly superplex. Reasons of general heelishness cause McIntyre to slap him in the face, meaning the comeback is on. McIntyre gets knocked outside again for the Samoan drop on the floor, followed by the Superman Punch back inside. The spear finishes McIntyre at 10:06.

Rating: D. The fans didn’t care and why should they have? As usual, it was clear that Reigns was going to win and that happens far too often at Wrestlemania. It’s amazing that Reigns got to come back here but it’s Reigns, who almost always wins, winning again in a match where the ending was obvious throughout. Nothing to see here, and the fans were silent throughout.

Post match Reigns gets to pose in a rather emotional moment.

Here’s Elias for his self described greatest performance ever. He’s on screen playing drums, with a second Elias joining him on piano and the real thing in the ring playing guitar. They jam for a bit and guitar Elias says the other two deserve a standing ovation. Elias teases more members of the band and gets in his catchphrase before loading up the song….but here’s a SPECIAL BULLETIN on Babe Ruth calling his shot in the 1932 World Series.

Cue John Cena in Dr. of Thuganomics gear and the fans seem rather pleased. Cena raps about how he’s about to turn heel and how bad his own movies are. WWE doesn’t stand for Walk With Elias because it really means Wasted Wrestling Experiment. We get a nuts joke, followed by the FU to leave Elias laying. They have history together so this was as good as you were going to get. This was funny for a change if nothing else and that’s a cool Wrestlemania feeling.

We recap Batista vs. HHH. Back at Smackdown 1000, Batista had mentioned that HHH never beat him but laughed it off. Then in February, Ric Flair was having a 70th birthday celebration but Batista attacked him, while asking HHH if he had his attention. This set up the match, with Batista demanding that HHH give him what he wanted (over and over and over). HHH has put up his career just in case the ending was in the slightest bit of doubt.

Shawn Michaels is guest commentator.

Batista vs. HHH

No holds barred with HHH’s career on the line. Batista goes out to glare at Shawn but here’s HHH, riding in a Mad Max style cart because of course he is. Batista drives him straight into the corner to start so HHH is back with some right hands to the face. A backdrop sends Batista outside but he throws HHH over the announcers’ table in a crash. HHH is right back up with a ram into the barricade and busts out a chain to whip Batista over the back.

The chain is pulled into Batista’s mouth (Shawn: “That’s not going to help his movie career.”) and HHH whips him into the steps. To ramp up the pain, HHH busts out some pliers to bend Batista’s fingers around a bit. HHH isn’t done with the toolbox so he grabs some needle nose pliers and ribs Batista’s nose ring out. To be fair, that thing looked horrible. Cole: “HHH just ripped a nose ring out of the nose of Batista.” So the nose ring in his ear is still intact.

Batista’s nose is good enough to drop HHH onto the announcers’ table and then he does it again onto a different one. A chair to the back sets up the shoulders in the corner for two as things have slowed way down. Batista slams him down for two more and let’s go outside again. The steps are set on the table and another table is cleared off as this is taking quite a long time for one big spot.

The huge Batista Bomb through the table is countered with a backdrop onto (not through) the other table and they’re both down again. HHH gets up, spinebusters him through the table, and we get another breather. HHH pulls out the sledgehammer but it’s a spear to cut him down for two. This time it’s HHH knocking the sledgehammer away from Batista, earning himself a spinebuster in the process. The Batista Bomb, which makes HHH drop the sledgehammer again, connects for two.

With nothing else working, Batista brings in the steps but goes up top for some reason. That reason would be so HHH can powerbomb him onto the steps, setting up a Pedigree for two (Because this MUST KEEP GOING!). They’re both down again so here’s Flair to slip HHH the sledgehammer. HHH gets up and uses the steps as a launchpad to hammer Batista in the head. Since that’s not enough to pin him (or KILL HIM as it probably should have), Batista pops up to take the Pedigree for the pin at 25:45.

Rating: D. Why does HHH do this? They could have had the same match with at least ten minutes chopped off but for some reason we needed to get HHH’s latest big epic match, no matter how much people aren’t interested in seeing it. This was terrible with Batista looking like a shell of his glory days (fair enough) and the match going WAY longer than it should have. Horrible match, and did you expect anything else given this style of match’s history?

The B Team model Daniel Bryan WWE Champion shirts but here’s Ron Simmons for the joke.

JBL is your next guest commentator.

Baron Corbin vs. Kurt Angle

This is Angle’s retirement match as he can barely get in the ring without injuring himself these days and needs to limp away for good. Corbin is here because we all did something horrible in a past life. Angle goes after him to start but gets knocked into the corner to put him in early trouble. Corbin takes it to the corner and pounds away before mocking Angle’s family a bit. A missed middle rope ax handle sends Corbin throat first into the rope so Angle snaps off some suplexes for two.

Angle walks into a big boot but is fine enough to grab a quickly broken ankle lock. Deep Six gives Corbin two more but he misses a charge, allowing the Angle Slam to connect for two. The straps come down and the ankle lock goes on until Corbin rolls him into the corner for the break. Corbin throws in a You Can’t See Me so Angle punches him into more rolling German suplexes. The moonsault misses though and the End of Days finishes Kurt’s career at 5:59.

Rating: D. Angle does seem fine with putting Corbin over on the way out but this was another step in the seemingly eternal nonsense that was/is the Corbin push. It’s a lot to take and while I can live with Angle going out on his back, it’s a lot to take because Corbin really is going way above his pay grade every time he’s in a match like this.

Post match Angle thanks the fans and asks for one more YOU SUCK chant for the road.

Intercontinental Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Finn Balor

Lashley, with Lio Rush, is defending and they’ve traded the title, so tonight it’s the Demon to make the match feel big. Balor gets a special entrance by coming down off a raised platform, though it’s not as creepy as his NXT entrances. Lashley has very bright green contacts in for some reason. Some early dropkicks put Lashley on the floor and Balor takes him out with a dive for a bonus.

A hard drive into the apron cuts Balor off though and there’s a suplex to make it worse. Lashley clotheslines him hard to the floor but a Sling Blade gets Balor out of trouble. Rush’s distraction lets Lashley hit a HARD spear through the ropes though and a regular one gets two back inside. Balor fights out of a powerbomb and hits one of his own, setting up the Coup de Grace for the pin and the title at 4:01.

Rating: C. The match was entertaining enough for something that was going so fast but at the same time, the booking still doesn’t make a ton of sense. Balor has already shown that he can beat Lashley so now he needs to bring up the powers to win? And the extraordinary thing was just a powerbomb? I’m glad to see the Demon again but this wasn’t exactly the most logical thing in the world.

Here’s Alexa Bliss to announce the attendance record of 82,265. Cue R-Truth and Carmella for the Wrestlemania Dance Break (Remember those?).

We recap the main event of Raw Women’s Champion Ronda Rousey and Smackdown Women’s Champion Charlotte defending against Becky Lynch in a winner take all match. Rousey is the unstoppable force, Charlotte is Charlotte and Becky is here because she’s the hottest name in wrestling at the moment and won the Royal Rumble. Tonight the winner leaves with both titles and it’s the biggest women’s match in history.

Raw Women’s Title/Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch

Lynch is challenging both. In a nod to her father and the Four Horsemen, Charlotte lance in a helicopter outside and walks into the stadium. Already inside, Joan Jett and the Blackhearts play Rousey to the ring. There is something so cool about watching Becky walk down the ramp in a wide shot as Cole talks about how she has started a movement. I’m not sure if that is the right term but it looked awesome. The bell rings and even a year later I still can’t believe this happened. The women’s division was a joke just a few years ago and now it’s the biggest match of the year. That’s hard to believe and it’s very cool.

They stare at each other for a good bit to start until Becky goes after Rousey’s arm. Rousey kicks her to the floor without much trouble and that means a Samoan drop into the barricade. Charlotte follows and takes Piper’s Pit but pops right back up for a fall away slam to send Rousey into the barricade for a change. That sets up the required Charlotte vs. Becky fight with Becky getting the better of things but can’t get the Figure Four, allowing Rousey to come and hammer away.

Charlotte breaks up an armbar attempt but gets pulled into a triangle choke over the ropes. Becky hits a running dropkick though and Rousey falls HARD onto the floor in a nasty crash. That leaves Charlotte to knee Becky in the head as the fans get behind Becky in a big way. Charlotte’s moonsault hits knees and Becky gets the Disarm-Her but Rousey make the save in a hurry. A double Natural Selection gives Charlotte two each and it’s Becky going outside this time.

For some reason Charlotte tries to slug it out with Rousey, earning herself a knee to the head. Charlotte pulls her into a Boston crab, drawing Becky in for her own save. Becky and Charlotte slug it out again until Charlotte is sent to the apron. Charlotte gets caught up top with a super Bexploder for two but Rousey drops both of them with a high crossbody for a double near fall. The double armbar goes on so Becky and Charlotte powerbomb her for the break. It took three attempts but they finally got out.

Everyone is down for a bit until Becky hits a Rock Bottom for two on Charlotte. Rousey goes after Becky and gets pulled straight into the Disarm-Her so she uses the ropes to power up in the corner. That’s fine with Becky, who puts it on again in the corner until Charlotte boots her in the face. Charlotte’s super Spanish Fly gets two but she might have banged up her knee. Rousey’s knee is banged up as well so Charlotte stomps away and grabs the Figure Four around the post.

After sending Becky into the barricade, Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight but Becky dives in off the top for another save. Just because, let’s bring in a table but Charlotte decks Becky for taking too long to set it up. Rousey shoves Charlotte off the top and turns the table over because she doesn’t need it. A double spear takes down Becky and Rousey so Charlotte sets up the table in the corner.

Charlotte sends Rousey face first into the table and spears Becky for two more. Back up and Charlotte gets hiptossed through the table, leaving Becky and Rousey to have the slugout we’ve been waiting for. They throw some serious hands but Piper’s Pit is countered into a crucifix (with Rousey’s shoulder a good six inches off the mat in a bad botch) to give Becky both titles at 21:28.

Rating: B. I don’t know if it’s because I didn’t watch it in one sitting this time around but I liked the match a good bit better on a second viewing. These three beat each other up and while Becky winning was the presumed finish, it wasn’t entirely a lock given who she was in there against. It was a heck of a fight and the three of them all came out looking great. This is much more historic than good, but it’s really rather good and that’s always a positive way to go out.

Rousey is ticked as Becky celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The positives are better than the negatives but not by much. There are some flat out bad matches on here but they are overcome by some great feelings with the faces winning all of the big matches for a change. That felt like an old school style as for the first time in what felt like forever, they didn’t cut the fans off for the sake of dragging things out until later. For once it felt like a season finale and that’s what Wrestlemania should be when it gets the chance. Good show, but it could have been a lot better.

How you ask? CUT THE SHOW DOWN! Look at how long this show is and tell me that it’s well put together. There is no need for a sixteen match card, especially with some of the matches that feel tacked on. All three Tag Team Title matches feel like they’re here for the sake of being here and some of the matches just need to be shortened. Either that or find a way to get people to the ring faster. I know it seems simple but how much of these shows are spent on ring entrances alone? Just find a way to shorten things, please.

Overall there are more good things than bad, but this isn’t a show that you need to watch in one sitting. As soon as you get to the point where the show is five hours plus an episode of Smackdown before it starts (and a Smackdown with more wrestling than usual at that), you’re hitting a firm ceiling of how much you can enjoy this. I know you can’t cut out big chunks, but find a way to get this under six hours. Do that and it’s a lot better, but that has been the case for years now and it keeps getting longer. Either way, at least we had enough nice stuff on here, but don’t watch it all at once.

Ratings Comparison

Tony Nese vs. Buddy Murphy

Original: C+

Redo: C

Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D

Revival vs. Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins

Original: C

Redo: D+

Men’s Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Usos vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev vs. The Bar vs. Aleister Black/Ricochet

Original: C+

Redo: B

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Original: C-

Redo: D-

Boss N Hug Connection vs. Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. IIconics vs. Nia Jax/Tamina

Original: D

Redo: D

Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: A-

Redo: A

Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Drew McIntyre vs. Roman Reigns

Original: C-

Redo: D

Batista vs. HHH

Original: D+

Redo: D

Baron Corbin vs. Kurt Angle

Original: F

Redo: D

Finn Balor vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: C

Redo: C

Ronda Rousey vs. Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C+

About the same all around, but some of those earlier ones are a good bit off. Still though, too long, despite some of the very good parts.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/04/08/wrestlemania-xxxv-so-much-for-no-happy-endings/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXIV (2019 Edition): Last Year’s Prototype

Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Chloe x Hallie

I’m not sure if it’s because I was in the stadium last year or something else, but this show was actually a bit more memorable than the previous few editions. Hopefully it’s just as good watching it back but you never can tell with these things. Brock Lesnar is defending the Universal Title against Roman Reigns in the main event because of course he is so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

JR and Jerry Lawler come out for commentary with Byron Saxton for a bit of a feel good moment. It’s a brawl to start with English getting backdropped out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Anderson dumps Konnor and Ziggler starts his tradition of hanging on to avoid elimination. There goes Hawkins as we still need to clear out a lot of the ring. Former partners R-Truth and Goldust shake hands with Goldust eliminating him, cutting off JR’s Bearcat Wright’s references.

Primo is out next as there’s almost nothing between these eliminations. Kanellis gets tossed and Ziggler hangs on again. Things settle down a bit unto Apollo knees Breeze as JR mocks Ziggler for always having to save himself. Viktor is gone too and the Revival beats on Ryder but he’s right back up. The Broski Boot is loaded up on Ziggler (JR: “Ziggler in trouble. Again.”) but Rawley Pounces Ryder out in a nice touch. A Liger kick from Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows as we take a break.

Apollo getting backdropped out and Benjamin follows him…and let’s look at the announcers. We come back with Rhyno and the Revival gone and Kane eliminating Axel and Dallas. And now, we look at John Cena in the crowd as a fan, because I had forgotten about that stupid story. Back with Sin Cara eliminated by Corbin and Fandango dancing at Kane, earning himself an elimination off a single uppercut.

Corbin gets rid of Slater and Kane eliminates Gable, leaving us with the big power showdown. Everyone else jumps the monsters and it’s a superkick to Titus, setting a clothesline to get rid of him. We’re down to Corbin, Dillinger, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Hardy and Kane as Goldust loads up Shattered Dreams on Dillinger. That’s broken up by Ziggler so Goldust ties him up for Shattered Dreams as well. Dillinger takes the kick but Ziggler eliminates Goldust.

That leaves us with a TEN vs. DELETE battle with a Twist of Fate and Dillinger is gone. Kane tosses Ziggler but gets eliminated by Corbin to get us down to Corbin, Hardy and Rawley. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the villains go for the elimination….but here’s the returning Bray Wyatt for Sister Abigail into an elimination for Rawley. Corbin drops Wyatt but gets backdropped out to give Matt the win at 16:36.

Rating: D+. It was a battle royal that got a lot of time and wasn’t all that interesting. The ending was a cool moment and it’s the best way to get everyone on the card, even if most of these people mean a grand total of nothing. It’s not a good match or even anything memorable, but at least it got the crowd warmed up….with an hour to go before the show itself starts.

Post match Matt thanks Bray and we get a hug, which JR deems a Wrestlemania moment.

Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

Tournament final to crown a new champion after Enzo Amore was finally banished. Ali debuts his SubZero look, which he still uses a year later. They’re both very happy to be there and slaps hands before getting started. Cedric scores with a shoulder block but gets headscissored down as the announcers are right there to play up the power vs. speed idea, though you don’t exactly think of power when it comes to Alexander.

Now the 054 connects for two, the first time the move has ever only gotten a near fall. Another 054 misses and it’s a pair of spinning back elbows to Ali’s face. A third turns Ali inside out and the Lumbar Check makes Cedric champion at 12:21. Cedric immediately hugs the unconscious Ali in a nice show of sportsmanship.

Rating: B. I was pulling for Ali but it felt like a title match between two guys fighting with everything they had. Cedric was the favorite in the entire tournament but Ali came off looking like a star the whole way through. This was rather good stuff and should have been the Kickoff Show main event, though I’ll take a good match when I can.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Dana Brooke, Becky Lynch, Sarah Logan, Lana, Bianca Belair, Naomi, Sonya Deville, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Peyton Royce, Natalya, Dakota Kai, Mickie James, Taynara Conti, Ruby Riott, Kairi Sane, Sasha Banks, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Bayley

This was going to be the Fabulous Moolah Memorial Battle Royal but history intervened and it’s just a regular battle royal this time around. Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary and the former has some advice: don’t get thrown over the top rope. Becky comes out first, everyone else comes out, followed by Sasha and Bayley to fill out the field. Miss Money in the Bank Carmella (erg) poses with the briefcase to start and everyone gangs up on her for the easy elimination.

Deville, who got the elimination, poses in the big circle of women but Dana gets thrown in the middle instead. That means trash talk from Brooke and the big beatdown is on with Mandy tossing Dana. The NXT women team up to send the main roster women outside (through the ropes rather than over, which I can’t stand in battle royals) so we can get the WE ARE NXT pose.

Becky yells at Devi about orange being HER COLOR as some of the main roster women get back in. Kai eliminates Mandy as Paige declares Deville her favorite member of Absolution. We stop for the NXT women to triple team Deville, setting up Belair’s 450, because THAT MAKES SENSE IN A BATTLE ROYAL! Deville is out and we take a break, coming back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow thanks to more ganging up on Riott during the break.

Lana and Devi are tossed and Conti gets kicked out by the Squad. Becky and Belair have a less than thrilling slugout and the hair whip is incredibly loud. Belair misses a charge though and gets kicked out, followed by Kai kicking Naomi in the face. Banks gets rid of Kai without much effort and there goes Becky to a chorus of boos (I think Becky will be fine). Ruby knocks Mickie out and it’s Royce’s turn to kick people in the face.

Logan powerbombs her out as well though and we’re down to Morgan, Logan, Riott, Bayley, Banks, Natalya and Naomi, who is out on the floor (oh dear). For some reason Natalya decides to pose with her back turned to the Squad but manages to suplex Ruby and Sarah at the same time.

Bayley saves Sasha from a suplex and helps get rid of Natalya. Morgan is out as well and there goes Ruby. Banks sends Logan to the apron and Bayley knocks her out, leaving us with Banks and Bayley. The fans actually get on their feet to cheer for this one and the handshake…lets Bayley throw Banks out to a big reaction but Naomi gets back in for the Rear View. That’s enough for the win at 9:39.

Rating: F+. I had forgotten how annoying that ending was but it makes you realize just how stupid this whole thing was. Bayley and Banks would go on to have their weird semi-feud and then partnership over the year while Naomi has done NOTHING important since this match. You have something here with Bayley and the bright idea is to do the HAHA WE TRICKED YOU ending? That’s been done to death in battle royals and it’s not like this was anything more than a surprise ending, which was really stupid given how Bayley had been searching for anything important for the last year. This actually ticked me off again so well done.

Jojo introduces Chloe and Hallie to sing America the Beautiful, describing them as the “future of music”. Well if Jojo says it then it must be true.

The opening video shows shots of parties in New Orleans and, just like in 2014, features a tagline of Let The Good Times Roll. They couldn’t come up with anything else in four years? And the theme song is still Celebrate by Kid Rock. Ok it’s a catchy song, but is there nothing else (or no one else) that they could use?

Yay pyro! And cool set with the Mardi Gras mask, which looked awesome all night long.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the lower bowl and looking not quite directly at the far post on the right side opposite the hard camera.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and we get the new idea this year: 3D graphics for some of the entrances, including Miz who gets the Miz logo and various words to describe him, including MOVIE STAR. Miz sends the Miztourage to the back because he wants to do this himself for his newborn daughter. The weird part is you couldn’t see those in the stadium (obviously) but you could see them on the screens around the building, which made your head snap around a few times.

Balor isn’t the Demon here, but instead comes out with a bunch of LGBT people in rainbow Balor Club shirts labeled FOR EVERYONE. If nothing else, it’s awesome to see the stadium doing the Balor pose at once. This was set up with both guys beating Miz in one night, because Balor beating Miz after Miz had a long match with Rollins is totally the same thing.

They all go for the way too early rollups to start with Miz being sent outside. That means Rollins can miss a Stomp on Balor but a superkick to the ribs works just fine. Balor sends Rollins outside though and it’s the big running flip dive onto both of them for the first major pop of the night. Back in and basement dropkick gives Balor two on Miz but Rollins is back in with a high crossbody.

Miz finally gets to do something other than get beaten up as we look at Cena in the crowd again. Rollins grabs a double Blockbuster for two on Miz but he’s right back up with a knee to the ribs (not face Cole). The chinlock goes on, which shouldn’t be the case less than four minutes into a triple threat. Back up and a neckbreaker gets two on Miz as they’re just trading moves until we get to the big stuff. Another chinlock seems to annoy Balor so he gets up again and hits the double stomp to Miz’s ribs.

Rollins is back in for a Sling Blade to Balor, setting up a suicide dive to Balor and Miz. A superkick drops Balor again but Miz comes in with a DDT for two. Miz goes with the strategy by bending Balor’s knee around the ropes and slapping on the Figure Four. The frog splash from Rollins (from out of nowhere for an awesome visual) breaks it up and all three of them head outside.

Balor escapes the barricade powerbomb and dropkicks them both into the barricade instead. Back in again and 1916 gets two on Rollins but Miz breaks up the Coup de Grace. Instead of the Tower of Doom though it’s the buckle bomb to Miz and a superplex into the Falcon Arrow to Balor. The Skull Crushing Finale gives Miz two on Rollins and they’re all down again.

Balor does his hop over the ropes in the corner but gets crotched for trying the Coup de Grace again. It’s just not working this time dude. Miz goes up top with Balor and catches a springboarding Rollins with something close to a super Skull Crushing Finale. Balor breaks it up with a Coup de Grace and hits a second on Miz but the Stomp breaks that up too. Another Stomp hits Miz to give Rollins the pin and the title at 15:37.

Rating: B-. This might have been a few minutes too long but Rollins winning was a fine call as he’s more than over enough and kind of fits the Workrate Champion idea to perfection. Miz can come back and break the all time days record later and Balor is over no matter what. Not a great match, but a very hot opener and the fans were into everything here.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match, which is billed as the BIGGEST WOMEN’S MATCH IN WRESTLEMANIA HISTORY. My how times change. Anyway Charlotte is the queen of everything and Asuka won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot. It’s absolutely a dream match with Charlotte being Charlotte and Asuka still being undefeated.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and gets the full Ric Flair theme song, complete with a HHH from Wrestlemania XXX inspired entrance, meaning soldiers to help her off a throne and take her robe. Asuka on the other hand gets the CGI masks with rainbow colored lines surrounding them, which look cool on screen but live….not so much. They lock up to start and take turns flipping out of wristlocks for an early standoff.

Charlotte loads up a monkey flip but instead trips the leg for a failed Figure Eight attempt. You can feel the intensity here and it’s working well so far. Some chops to the chest (and one to the face) have Asuka in trouble but she’s right back with a hip attack to knock Charlotte outside. Back in and it’s time to start in on the arm but Charlotte gets in a backbreaker into an STO. Charlotte uses a Backpack Stunner to get out of a sleeper and a knee to the back of the head keeps Asuka in trouble.

It’s enough trouble for Charlotte to go up top for the moonsault….which is countered into a triangle for a sweet escape. Charlotte reverses into a Boston crab until Asuka makes the rope. A sliding kick to the face knocks Charlotte backwards and it’s back to the arm as Asuka continues to follow her game plan. They head to the apron with Asuka suplexing her out to the floor in a good looking crash. Sometimes you need to just go with a big spot like that and it worked very well.

Back in and they stare each other down until Asuka just erupts with strikes to the face. A missile dropkick gets two and Asuka stomps on the back. Charlotte is fine enough for the chops to catch Asuka on top and it’s a super Spanish Fly for two with the fans getting much more into things in a hurry. Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold from Asuka’s back for a cool change of pace.

Charlotte tries to flip out and into the Figure Eight but Asuka kicks her in the head for a block. Well that’s certainly to the point. The Asuka Lock is blocked and Charlotte hits a very good spear for two more as the fans are WAY into this. With nothing else working, Charlotte goes to the Figure Eight and bridges up with one arm….and Asuka taps at 13:05 in a shocker.

Rating: A-. I don’t get shocked by results very often but I was actually stunned to see how this went. I would have bet money on Asuka walking out as champion here but Charlotte winning was far from a ridiculous result. Now the problem is what this did to Asuka, as she only started to recover from the loss nearly a year later. Charlotte would lose the title to Carmella two days later, bringing some dark days to the belt. This however was anything but dark, with an outstanding match between two stars.

Post match Asuka gets the mic and says Charlotte was ready for her in the ultimate sign of respect.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something that makes him get out of his seat and run up the ramp. You really couldn’t wait until the women were gone so they could have the full moment?

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Orton is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Aiden English (now bald, meaning he shaved his head since the end of the battle royal when he had hair) handles Rusev’s entrance and we get my favorite shot every year: a closeup of someone with the camera swinging around to show the stadium crowd in front of them. There’s something so cool about seeing just how big of a stage they’re really on. Anyway, Rusev is crazy over and easily the crowd favorite. Does anyone else see an issue with Orton’s music saying “I hear voices in my head” while his Titantron says IN MY VEINS?

While you think about that, Orton and Mahal are sent outside, leaving Rusev to dropkick (yes dropkick) Roode to the floor. A RUSEV DAY Cannonball off the apron takes Orton and Mahal down again but Roode is back in with a Blockbuster for two on Rusev. The other two get back in and it’s Mahal getting beaten up by Orton and Roode before being tossed right back to the floor. Orton hits the top rope superplex on Roode with Rusev and Mahal diving back in for the save.

That’s enough for Mahal to ask Rusev for a partnership but Rusev doesn’t even bother waiting before hitting Mahal with a spinning belly to back suplex for two. Roode makes it worse by busting Mahal’s spine and hitting the GLORIOUS pose, only to have Orton make a save this time.

That leaves Orton alone in the ring and it’s the hanging DDT on Rusev. The RKO hits English, Rusev and Mahal so it’s Roode making a save of his own. Roode blocks the RKO and plants Orton with the Glorious DDT as Mahal saves. The Machka Kick drops Mahal but Sunil Singh offers a distraction, letting Mahal hit the Khallas for the pin on Rusev at 8:14. You could literally feel the energy go out of the crowd.

Rating: D+. There was some hard work in there but this was the definition of Vince saying screw the audience because it’s all about what I want. Rusev was one of the most popular guys in the company and had been for months but instead we get Mahal, who was an all time bomb as WWE Champion getting to pin Rusev.

It’s not like there was even a long term plan as Mahal would lose the title a mere eight days later. Rusev would indeed get the title nearly nine months later, after his popularity had fallen way down, meaning it was acceptable to give the fans what they want. This really hurt the show and it’s going to be hard to recover.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon and yeah I think this might help the recovery process. After being at Wrestlemania XXXI and attacking Stephanie, Rousey made her official WWE debut at the Royal Rumble earlier in the year. She wanted to go to Wrestlemania and since she was (at the time) the most dominant female UFC fighter of all time, Stephanie wanted to mold her into a WWE star.

Angle, who had been screwed over by Stephanie and HHH before, warned Ronda that they would mess with her too. That didn’t sit well with Rousey, who beat both of them up on the way to this mixed tag match. Naturally we got a lot of Stephanie workout videos because she’s STEPHANIE and that makes her some wrestling legend. It’s sickening, and I was waiting on her to survive the armbar in the match. It was clear that this was going to be full of smoke and mirrors, but the question is how well Rousey is going to do in her debut. This is one of the main events of the show and something a lot of people really wanted to see.

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles (flanked by four women on their own motorcycles), with Stephanie’s biker look (including the leather pants) making me a lot less annoyed at her. Cole: “Even though Stephanie is a former Women’s Champion, this is her Wrestlemania in-ring debut!” WWE pretending that Stephanie was a wrestler is one of their more interesting character tweaks. Rousey gets a huge reaction and of course smiles at the crowd, as is her custom. Cole talks about two people starting in UFC and coming to WWE: Ken Shamrock and now Rousey. So they’re not Dan Severn fans either?

The fans are WAY behind Rousey as they stare each other down in the middle. Stephanie shoves Rousey in the face because Stephanie just never learns. A hair pull doesn’t prove to be the brightest idea either so Stephanie bails to the apron so the guys can start us off. Angle (very badly) punches at HHH and the beating is on in the corner. A hammerlock keeps HHH does as we’re just waiting for this to explode as it should be doing.

Stephanie manages to lure Rousey in though and Angle gets low bridged to the floor. Cole calls this “that McMahon instinct” as the worship is already a lot to take. Angle gets sent into the steps and Rousey is about to lose it because she can’t intervene. Some more cheap shots from Stephanie keep Rousey angry and a spinebuster gives HHH two. A front facelock keeps Angle down but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Stephanie chokes Angle and HHH nearly hits her by mistake but it’s still too early for the hot tag. A suplex drops HHH again but Stephanie runs around and pulls Rousey off the apron. HHH gets whipped over the corner for the real crash and you can see the panic in Stephanie. The hot tag brings in Rousey (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!!!”) who SPRINTS over to Stephanie and throws her down with a suplex. After the required tug of the shorts, Rousey unloads with rights and lefts in the corner as the fans are already losing it. The release throw sends Stephanie back into the corner and Graves is terrified.

The fans want and receive the armbar….but Stephanie blocks it. Yes the hold that UFC fighters were powerless again is a simple block for Stephanie as the crowd’s soul is slapped down again. Stephanie blocks it a second time and rakes the eyes (Cole: “Complete manipulation of the rules!” Ignore the complete manipulation of reality and focus on those rules man.”), setting up a double arm crank as the fans try to process that they’re really doing this.

Stephanie even mocks Rousey, who grabs her by the throat and hits the swinging Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee. Rousey: “I’m going to continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls her out as well, apparently not a fan of such chatty opponents. Angle is back up and sends HHH over the announcers’ table but gets thrown onto the Spanish table. After a slow crawl, HHH is back in and sees Rousey, who is ready to fight. HHH puts the referee in the corner and sizes Rousey up and the beating is on in the corner.

A legsweep looks to set up the swinging Samoan drop but Stephanie makes a save. I know I’m not a big HHH fan a lot of the time but he just made Rousey look like the biggest star in the history of the division. Rousey chases Stephanie outside though and has to adjust the gear again, allowing Stephanie to post her. Angle is back in for some belly to belly suplexes and the rolling Germans but the ankle lock is countered. The Pedigree is countered as well and HHH gets catapulted into the corner, setting up the Angle Slam for two with no one making a save.

Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock and yells at Angle, who catches the boot to the ribs. HHH has to save his wife and Pedigrees Angle for two with Rousey making her own save this time. With Angle down, HHH loads Rousey up for a powerbomb but gets hurricanranaed (!) into the armbar on HHH (I completely bought that as the finish live) until Stephanie grabs a choke.

That’s reversed into an armbar and Stephanie has the gall to block it AGAIN. Angle ankle locks HHH, who rolls Angle into Rousey for the real save. Rousey and Angle get posted and it’s time for stereo Pedigrees, both of which are broken up. The armbar is slapped on again and this time Rousey uses the leverage to pull back and Stephanie finally taps at 20:37.

Rating: A. That’s not even on a sliding scale because Rousey knocked that out harder than she knocked out Alexis Davis. She looked like she’s been doing this for ten years and had one of the best debut matches I’ve ever seen. Everyone else was nailing it too and I got completely sucked into it both live and watching it back because all of the stuff was that good. Don’t have Stephanie block the armbar so often and this is an A+ easy.

That was the only downgrade, even though you knew full well it was coming. To be fair though, Stephanie did tap out clean in the end so it wasn’t the most ridiculous thing ever. Well the first part was but not the finish. After this, how can you now see Rousey as the star that she already was?

Stephanie has to be helped out, as she should. She would get armbarred again the next night for a bonus.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Kofi wastes no time in hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jey but Harper pulls him outside before the count. Jimmy gets sent into the steps and Harper crashes against Big E. against the barricade. With no one else to beat up, Woods gets powerbombed against the post, leaving Rowan to splash Kofi and Jey back inside. The mostly done Jey is thrown outside and Big E. gets knocked off the apron. Jimmy comes back in for a pair of superkicks and Jey is back up for stereo kicks to Harper’s head in the corner.

A jumping enziguri hits Harper and a superkick knocks Rowan to the floor, setting up a double suplex on the outside. Harper catches Kofi with a swinging release Boss Man Slam but gets caught with a double superkick on top. Rowan breaks up the Tower of Doom so Kofi charges at Harper, only to get powerbombed by Rowan. An assisted super sitout powerbomb finishes Kofi to give Harper and Rowan the titles at 5:55.

Rating: C-. The time cuts aside, this wasn’t the worst match in the world with the Usos and the New Day giving it all they had against the monsters but not being able to stop them. The Bludgeon Brothers were the first time a team other than the Usos or New Day had held the belts in over a year so this was long, long overdue and the right call.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network, most of which actually happened for a change.

Here’s a fired up John Cena for his match with Undertaker. This comes after weeks of Cena calling out Undertaker for Wrestlemania because Undertaker seemingly retired after last year’s show. Cena came off as the biggest jerk in this feud and acting like Undertaker owed him something. There was no confirmation that Undertaker was going to be here, hence him sitting in the crowd earlier.

That’s the other stupid part of the whole thing: Cena kept talking about how he had no path to Wrestlemania, because JOHN CENA couldn’t get a match. He gave some lame excuse about how this was the only match that mattered and it didn’t do a thing to make up for the consistently annoying lines from commentary about Cena possibly being left out of Wrestlemania. I get what they were going for, but come on already.

Anyway Cena is ready to go but here’s a referee to say not so fast. Cena is disappointed and the lights go out. It’s only Elias though and Cena heads back to his seat as Elias sings about it being his night. That’s enough for Cena who runs in and beats Elias up before looking disappointed again. Cole: “I guess that would be a Wrestlemania moment right?” He goes up the ramp but stops….and the lights go out again. A spotlight hits the ring with Undertaker’s hat, coat and boots, which are hit by lighting (looks awful on the Network, looked great when you didn’t see it coming in the stadium. They’re gone, and the gong strikes.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

I know he’s been old for ten years, but that entrance live, especially in the stadium, is chilling. Cole of course can’t SHUT UP, saying everything he can think of, including calling them the two greatest performers of all time. Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner to start and hits the jumping clothesline. Old School connects and Undertaker hits some running clotheslines in the corner. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the big leg have Cena rocked but the chokeslam is escaped.

Cena’s belly to back connects but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, making Cena fall down in fear. The chokeslam into the Tombstone finishes Cena at 2:48. The more I think of this one, the more I like it. Cena ran his mouth for so long and Undertaker annihilated him here, just as he should have. While a lot of people will be annoyed at not getting a full form match between these two, I’d rather they do this than have Undertaker look back in a fifteen minute match.

Video on the Hall of Fame ceremony.

Here’s the Hall of Fame Class, which really doesn’t need to air on the show. They already get a whole evening to themselves. Do we really need ten minutes on Wrestlemania too?

Jeff Jarrett (eh sure, though it’s still weird to see him here)

Mark Henry (still not sure on him, though his documentary was great)

Hillbilly Jim (I’m a Kentucky boy but come on)

Ivory (she looks better now than she did during her career)

Jarius JJ Robertson (Warrior Award)

Dudley Boyz (yep)

Goldberg (yep, though I’d call the Dudleys more appropriate headliners)

Oh and Kid Rock, this year’s celebrity inductee, wasn’t there because he had a concert.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens. Bryan somehow overcame his injuries and returned to the ring in something I still can barely believe. Owens and Zayn had tormented Smackdown boss Shane for months and then attacked Bryan for firing them the night he was announced as being cleared. Therefore it’s a tag match with Owens and Zayn fighting for their jobs. Yeah that’s all well and good. The point here is Bryan actually getting back in the ring, which is almost impossible to imagine.

Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon

Owens and Zayn beat McMahon up on Smackdown to cover for Shane’s legitimate medical issues. Chris Jericho was apparently on red phone alert for this show with a plan to have him fly in from a Fozzy show on the corporate jet in case Shane couldn’t make the show. Bryan gets a special entrance with a weird military/Terminator themed video showing a target on the Superdome before looking at the YES Movement spreading throughout the world in a cool moment. You can feel the emotions in Bryan as he comes down the aisle and it’s an amazing sight to behold.

Owens and Zayn jump the good guys from behind and Shane gets thrown over the barricade. Bryan takes a Helluva kick and the apron powerbomb to leave him laying. Medics come out to check on Bryan as yes, they actually are trying to stretch this out even further. Shane is willing to fight on his own and unloads with the really bad punches to Owens in the corner.

There’s the jumping back elbow but Shane grabs his stomach due to the diverticulitis (the same thing that ruined Lesnar’s UFC career). A DDT drops Sami but Owens gets in a shot to the stomach to cut Shane off. We settle down into a regular match with Sami elbowing the ribs and going for one cover after another. Owens steps on the ribs and applauds Bryan for such a great return. A t-bone suplex gives Sami two and a superkick into the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The fans don’t care about this whatsoever and there’s no reason for them to.

With Bryan STILL being tended to at ringside, it’s just a big waiting game until Bryan gets back up and makes the hot tag. The Helluva Kick misses in the corner and Sami gets tied in the Tree of Woe. Coast to Coast hits but Shane can’t follow up because of the stomach. Owens drops the frog splash on Shane but Bryan dives in for the save to bring the fans back to life. The hot tag is cut off though and we hit the chinlock to make the fans wait a little longer. A belly to back suplex gets Shane out of trouble though and there’s the tag, with Bryan taking his time before getting in for an awesome moment.

House is cleaned and it’s the moonsault over Sami into the running clothesline. Owens comes back in and Bryan gets them in opposite corners for alternating running dropkicks. Sami is back with a Helluva Kick for two on Bryan and Owens superkicks Shane to the floor. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets two more and Owens is shocked at the kickout. Shane dives onto Owens, leaving Sami to yell at Bryan for coming back and punch him in the face. That’s enough for Bryan and the fight is on, including the YES Kicks. The running knee sets up the YES Lock to make Sami tap at 15:24.

Rating: C+. This was two matches in one with the rather boring beatdown of Shane for the first half before Bryan came in and gave the fans exactly what they wanted for the second half. It was all about Bryan and that’s all it was supposed to be. The idea that he actually made it back to the ring is amazing and one of the most surprising stories you’ll ever see in wrestling. He deserved a big moment like this and that’s what we got here, albeit after Shane got in his own time of course.

Attendance announcement, with pyro because it’s Wrestlemania.

We recap Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss. They were friends, but Jax found out that Bliss was making fun of her behind her back. Jax went into monster mode and chased after Bliss and her friend Mickie James, setting up this match. Now there’s no reason this shouldn’t be about thirty seconds long, but it’s Wrestlemania and what matters is getting on the card and having a long match instead of doing what makes sense.

Raw Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax

Bliss, with James in her corner, is defending and is lowered down to the stage on a platform for a nice touch. We get the Big Match Intros and Bliss immediately backs up as she should. Jax gets smart and runs Mickie over before the bell rings to send her outside for a heck of a beatdown. Bliss tries to intervene and gets glared back to the ring, leaving James to take a Samoan drop on the floor.

We get back inside for the opening bell and Bliss slaps her in the face. That earns a scream from Nia so Bliss screams back in true scream queen fashion. A gorilla press slam has Bliss bailing to the floor and it’s time to leave, only to have Nia run her over again. Back in and Bliss pokes her in the eye before going after the knee in a smart move.

What’s not a smart move is this match already going nearly three minutes with Bliss getting in any significant offense. A basement dropkick keeps Jax in trouble but a guillotine choke is easily countered via an overhead belly to belly suplex. Jax goes shoulder first into the post as the fans are quiet all over again. Twisted Bliss to a standing Nia on the floor gives Bliss another knockdown, setting up the short DDT for two back inside.

Bliss yells at her so Nia tells her to shut up already and the destruction begins. Another poke to the eye is no sold and Bliss gets whipped hard into the buckles. Bliss goes to the eye again to get out of the Samoan drop but Jax drives her into the corner and then drops her. That’s not enough as it’s a super Samoan drop to give Jax the pin and the title at 9:02.

Rating: D-. What were they thinking here? The whole story was that Bliss was all talk and survived because of Nia but then she hangs with Nia for the better part of ten minutes? This should have been thirty seconds long with Bliss getting the title back later on (as she did in June) after coming back from getting squashed. Just a bad idea all around here, save for Jax FINALLY winning the title.

We recap AJ Styles defending the Smackdown World Title against Shinsuke Nakamura. They had a classic match in Japan and a lot of fans wanted to see it again in WWE. Nakamura won the Royal Rumble and the match was on, with both guys trying to get in the other’s head on the way to New Orleans. So yeah, they’re just going with “it’s a dream match” for the build, which works just fine.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by Nita Strauss (awesome guitar player and rather gorgeous at the same time). The army of violinists and drummers help too. Since WWE can’t go more than five minutes without making some kind of a mistake, AJ is billed as Universal Champion. They lock up to start with Nakamura getting the better of it with some knees to the ribs.

Good Vibrations is blocked and AJ gets in his own knee before starting in on the back. Styles grabs a chinlock for a bit before dropkicking him to the floor. That’s not the best idea though as it’s a kick to the head to stagger Styles and the champ is in trouble for the first time. Nakamura’s middle rope kick to the face gets two and that’s a COME ON to set up the strikes to the face.

The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two but AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant. A sliding forearm into the pumphandle gutbuster gets two on Nakamura as they’re trading big spots. AJ’s springboard is countered into the Landslide (Samoan driver) for two but Nakamura needs a minute before following up. With nothing else working, Nakamura goes with the kicks, which are countered into the Calf Crusher.

Since it’s Nakamura, that’s reversed into a triangle choke, which AJ powers into something like a fisherman’s buster for another double knockdown. It’s Nakamura up first and trying a running knee in the corner but the bad knee hit the buckle instead. AJ is right back with a Phenomenal Forearm for two in the required kickout of the first finisher.

The springboard 450 hits knees and Nakamura grabs a small package for two of his own. They slug it out until AJ nails the Pele but can’t follow up, allowing Nakamura to knee him in the back of the head for a much nearer fall. The reverse exploder looks to set up the Kinshasa but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin to retain at 20:21.

Rating: B+. This was close to being a classic but it’s really just a very good match instead. Part of the problem here is how late the match came in the show. The fans were starting to get worn down and there was only so much energy left in the people. Also it never quite got to the epic level that they were shooting for with Nakamura never really getting the close near falls that he needed to take it to another level. Still that, very good and worthy of a Wrestlemania title match.

We recap the Kickoff Show. This is another few minutes that could be cut off.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

The Bar is defending after Strowman won a battle royal to become #1 contenders despite not having a partner. Therefore the big question for over a month is who would the partner be. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float, complete with people in large headed costumes for a cool visual. There’s no partner for Strowman, who breaks up the float before coming to the ring.

Strowman and the kid get in the ring where the kid is introduced as Nicholas (the son of referee John Cone). Cole: “This is really happening.” He’s never been more right. Oh and the search for a partner and introduction took about four and a half minutes, again because this show can just keep going. Strowman takes Sheamus into the corner with no problem to start before beating up Cesaro as well.

Nicholas is terrified (as he should be) as Cesaro dropkicks Strowman in the knee. A double suplex lets Sheamus drop a top rope knee, setting up an assisted swanton from Sheamus’ shoulders. Strowman comes back with a double crossbody and backdrops Sheamus over the top, bouncing him off the post in the process. To cap it off, Strowman tags Nicholas in. The kid is terrified and tags Strowman back in for the powerslam to Cesaro for the pin and the titles at 3:58.

Rating: F. I….what do you want from me here? This was an idea that completely failed because WWE had no idea what to do here and this is all they could do. Put Heath Slater or someone in there, or have Strowman do a rendition of Me And My Shadow and have him win it by himself. It was a joke that was literally forgotten the next night and stretched the show out even more because they couldn’t just cut this and put Strowman ANYWHERE else. I’m sure Matt Hardy had to win the battle royal right?

Wrestlemania 35 is in New York/Jersey. You don’t hear New Jersey mentioned here, but I guess it’s just implied.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. It’s the latest attempt to make Reigns feel like the mega star because the first few times didn’t take. Therefore he won the Elimination Chamber (beating Strowman after Strowman eliminated everyone else), THIS TIME FOR SURE! Lesnar has been champion for a year and barely ever defends the title, because that was so successful the first few times. Their fights over the last few weeks get the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and WOW the fans are not happy to see him. To make it a little better, Brock drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs, followed by the German suplexes. Reigns pops up with a Superman Punch to send Brock to the floor as they’re starting fast again. Back in and a clothesline knocks Lesnar over the top and out to the floor as the fans chant things to amuse themselves.

Lesnar catches him with a belly to belly on the floor and another one drops Reigns on his head. There’s the required CM PUNK chant and a third belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table because Brock didn’t realize how much room he had. Back in and Lesnar throws another German suplex, declaring it SUPLEX CITY B****. More suplexes ensue because that’s what Lesnar does in a big time match. Brock gets tired of that and loads up the announcers’ table but Reigns posts him for a much needed breather.

A spear puts Lesnar onto (not through) another table as the fans boo the heck out of this. Or maybe they’re mad about losing a beach ball. The Superman Punch into a pair of spears gets two and now the fans are definitely happy with a beach ball. Brock blocks a spear with a knee to the face that brings Graves out of his chair.

The first F5 gets two and virtually no reaction from the crowd. Another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. To switch it up, another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. The fans declare it boring so Lesnar takes him outside for the fourth F5 through the announcers’ table. Lesnar takes it back inside and stands there as the fans do something else in the crowd that goes from cheering to booing during the same closeup.

The fifth F5 gets two so Lesnar takes the gloves off at Heyman’s orders. The fans call it awful as Lesnar hammers away to bust Reigns open. It’s quite the gusher but Reigns slips out of the F5 and hits a pair of spears for two. Another spear is countered into the sixth F5 to retain the title at 15:51.

Rating: D+. Well of course he does. The problem here is that there is good action in the match but it’s too much of the same stuff and the fans having none of it that took away its value. Couple that with knowing that we’re just waiting on even more Reigns title shots and promos about needing to be champion and there was no way this was going to work. The fans (including myself) were done with this WAY before the match started and that’s all there was to it.

Reigns gets cleaned up and we get the long video package. Back in the stadium, Reigns leaves and the show ends. I stood around for a long time while this was going on because the video doesn’t play in the stadium and it wasn’t clear if the show was over or not.

Overall Rating: C-. I know I (and a lot of other people) say it over and over but it’s just too long. There is a limit to how long you can sit watching wrestling in person or at home and Wrestlemania has blown past that for years now. At some point you just stop caring and there’s very little that can be done to fix such a problem. They need to do something because this isn’t going to work no matter what they do. Cut out a lot of stuff and it’s a great show, but the whole package didn’t work.

There’s a lot of good stuff in here, such as the opener, AJ vs. Nakamura, Charlotte vs. Asuka, the mixed tag and a few other moments here and there. The problem is there’s so much other stuff that either doesn’t work (the main event, the Raw Women’s Title match and the Raw Tag Team Titles are great places to start) that it really doesn’t work. Get rid of some of that and the show is that much better.

Overall, it comes down to the problem of WWE not listening to the fans. They can throw out as much good content as they want, but if you do it to annoy the fans (the US Title match) or to stretch things out even further past its expiration point (the Universal Title), it’s going to come back to mess things up. There is so much on here that fans don’t want to see and WWE just won’t fix it.

That doesn’t help the length either. If you have a show where the final match is something the fans do not want to see, you’re going to have them sitting there, already annoyed at other things in the show, for hours waiting to see something that only WWE seems interested in. How is that supposed to be appealing for over seven hours? Cut it down, give us something else to cheer for, and remember that Wrestlemania is supposed to be about the best of the best, not everyone on the roster.

Ratings Comparison

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D-

Redo: D+

Mustafa Ali vs. Cedric Alexander

Original: B-

Redo: B

Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: F+

Seth Rollins vs. The Miz vs. Finn Balor

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Asuka

Original: A-

Redo: A

Jinder Mahal vs. Rusev vs. Randy Orton vs. Bobby Roode

Original: D

Redo: D+

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey

Original: A-

Redo: A

New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B+

Braun Strowman/Nicholas vs. The Bar

Original: F

Redo: F

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C-

This is an interesting one as most of the matches are within the same ballpark but I liked the show a lot better the first time around. Maybe the good was more fun just after the show, but this really didn’t do it for me nearly as well on another viewing. It’s watchable, but definitely not a very good show.

Here’s the original if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/04/14/wrestlemania-xxxiv-the-same-old-story/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – March 29, 2024: The Please Don’t Screw It Up Show

Smackdown
Date: March 29, 2024
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Commentators: Corey Graves, Wade Barrett

We are just over a week away from Wrestlemania and WWE is already in the northeast for the final push towards the show. That means things are already intense and there is a good chance that we are going to be getting some fallout from the Rock attacking Cody Rhodes on Raw. Jade Cargill is here as well so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a quick look back at The Rock attacking Cody Rhodes on Raw. More on this later.

Randy Orton/Kevin Owens vs. Pretty Deadly

Owens jumps Wilson to start and drops a quick backlash for an early two. Orton comes in to hammer away on Prince so Wilson tries to tag himself in…but he’s not holding the tag rope so it doesn’t count. Well that’s not something you see everyday. The villains take Orton outside for a drop onto the announcers’ table and we take an early break.

Back with Orton belly to backing his way out of a chinlock and the tag bringing Owens in again. A DDT gives Owens two as everything breaks down. Owens comes back in but Orton is taken outside for a drop onto the announcers’ table. Cue Logan Paul with the brass knuckles to drop Owens, allowing Prince to steal the pin at 7:02.

Rating: C. This was a way to advance the triple threat at Wrestlemania and that is not a bad way to go. Paul is at his best when he’s messing with people or things that that’s what you had here, with Owens getting a pretty humiliating loss to a goofy team. That isn’t going to sit well with Orton and odds are Paul knew that coming in.

Post match Orton pulls Paul out but Pretty Deadly makes the save. Owens breaks that up and Pretty deadly is laid out, with Orton chasing Paul to the back. The chase is on and Paul jumps into a car and drives off.

Iyo Sky talks about how Bayley formed Damage CTRL to leach off of them but Sky made Bayley relevant. Then the team outgrew Bayley so they did what had to be done. Sky stands up to end the interview but gets jumped by Bayley. They destroy the green screen and are finally separated. Good brawl, but we were told what would happen before the break and that hurt things.

Here is Nick Aldis for a chat. He’s happy to bring out Jade Cargill for her first official appearance as a member of the Smackdown roster. The contract is signed and Cargill says there are some talented stars around here, but none of them are here. That woman oozes star power at a level you do not see very often.

Damage CTRL doesn’t like Bianca Belair so Dakota Kai is taking her out tonight.

Nick Aldis runs into Isla Dawn and Alba Fyre, who have dropped the witchcraft stuff but don’t say anything. Aldis keeps walking and runs into AJ Styles, who asks if LA Knight isn’t here. Aldis says he asked Knight not to be here, but Styles says Aldis should have told him.

Wrestlemania Tag Team Titles Qualifying Match: Austin Theory/Grayson Waller vs. Street Profits

Ford flips out of a double suplex to start and hands it off to Dawkins, who runs Waller over on the floor. We take a break and come back with Dawkins suplexes his way out of trouble, allowing the diving tag to Ford. A springboard spinning back elbow to the face puts Theory down for two and the Doomsday Blockbuster gets the same. Theory’s rolling neckbreaker is cut off with a sitout powerbomb but we cut to the back where Karrion Kross and Scarlett have taken out Bobby Lashley and B Fab. The distraction lets Theory raise his knees to block the frog splash and pin Ford at 6:21.

Rating: C+. Well what we saw of it was good, but as is the case so often in modern wrestling, there is only so much you can get out of a match that runs less than seven minutes and includes a commercial plus a backstage brawl. This should set up a six man between Lashley/the Profits and the Final Testament, which is a feud that needs to wrap up already as it’s long since stopped being interesting.

Post match the Final Testament comes in for the beatdown with Bobby Lashley making a failed save attempt.

We look back at Dominik Mysterio costing Rey Mysterio a match with Santos Escobar last week.

Here is Legado del Fantasma for a chat. Santos Escobar is here to brag about his win last week. He was hoping for Rey’s knee to get infected and amputated (geez) but he’ll settle for just getting a win. All it took was the help of one man, so here is Dominik Mysterio for a chat. Escobar says Dominik was right and, after Dominik is booed out of the building, promises to ruin Rey.

Cue the LWO, with Rey saying he believed he was done with Dominik. But now Rey has the chance to beat some respect into both of them. The challenge for Dominik/Escobar vs. Rey/a partner of his choosing at Wrestlemania. That would be the newest member of the LWO: Dragon Lee. Cue Lee for the brawl as the match seems likely for Wrestlemania.

Naomi wishes Bianca Belair luck and says she has her back tonight. Belair is rather pleased and they’re in this together against Damage CTRL.

Judgment Day isn’t happy with what is going on with Rhea Ripley not even knowing what Dominik Mysterio was going to do.

Wrestlemania Tag Team Title Qualifying Match: New Catch Republic vs. Legado del Fantasma

We’re joined in progress with Dunne in trouble but he gets over for the tag to Bate as house is quickly cleaned. A standing shooting star hits Berto and the ring is cleared, with Bate hitting a big dive as we take a break. Back with Bate in trouble and getting double super gorilla pressed for two. Bate gets over for the tag seconds later though and the Birminghammer gives Dunne the pin at 7:19.

Rating: C+. Just like in the previous tag match, how much can you get out of a match that goes about seven minutes with a break? It doesn’t help that Legado was already beaten down from the pre-match brawl so the Republic doesn’t even look that great for winning. But at least we now have a sixth team for the 12 man ladder match, because we have a 12 man ladder match.

We look back at the Rock beating down Cody Rhodes to end Raw. The beating continued after the show went off the air.

The Bloodline promises to take out Jey Uso next week.

Here is AJ Styles, who says he should have had LA Knight locked up last week. Styles doesn’t buy that Knight isn’t here and thinks he might be the cameraman. That’s a no, but here’s someone coming through the crowd…and that’s not Knight either. One of the security guards is Knight though and even though Styles sees him on the Titantron, the beatdown is on anyway. Styles bails through the crowd.

Video on Tiffany Stratton.

Next week: the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal is back.

Bianca Belair vs. Dakota Kai

Belair starts fast and knocks Kai into the corner for the running shoulder. Some rolling suplexes have Kai in trouble but she knees her way to freedom and we take a break. Back with Belair raining down right hands in the corner, followed by a tilt-a-whirl gutbuster. A Glam Slam into a moonsault gives Belair two but Kai manages a knee to the back for the same. The exchange of forearms goes to Belair but Kai manages to send her to the apron. A running knee only hits post though and Belair grabs a superplex. The KOD gives Belair the pin at 9:26.

Rating: C+. There is nothing wrong with giving a star a win and that is all they were trying to do here. Kai is the weakest link in Damage CTRL and having her lose to Belair at one of the last shows before Wrestlemania is hardly some career killer. Odds are we’re getting ready for a big tag match at Wrestlemania so we can probably call this a mini preview.

Post match the Kabuki Warriors come in for the beating but Naomi makes the save. The numbers game catches up to her until Jade Cargill comes in for the real save.

Overall Rating: C+. Oh yeah we are firmly in the “we’re almost to Wrestlemania so please do not screw anything up” period. That means we don’t have much time left to wait but at the same time, there is only so much to be gotten out of a show like this one. There was a likely Wrestlemania match set up and two more teams qualified for the ladder match but that’s about it. This is a completely skippable show, but it’s probably the last skippable show for a few weeks and that is a great feeling.

Results
Pretty Deadly b. Randy Orton/Kevin Owens – Brass knuckles punch from Logan Paul
Austin Theory/Grayson Waller b. Street Profits – Knees to Ford’s ribs
New Catch Republic b. Legado del Fantasma – Birminghammer to Angel
Bianca Belair b. Dakota Kai – KOD

 

 

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