Wrestlemania XXXIII
Date: April 2, 2017
Location: Camping World Stadium, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 75,245
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

This hasn’t been quite a year yet but I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long night. Like a few years before, I was in the stadium for this show but haven’t seen it since I reviewed it last year. This is a show that was well received at the time and it could be interesting to see how it holds up a year later. Let’s get to it.

The set is one of the most intricate they’ve ever done, with a big Wrestlemania globe (ala Universal Studios) and a roller coaster next to it (I think you get this). There’s also an inflatable ring atop the structure above the regular ring, which I somehow didn’t notice until about an hour and a half of being in the stadium). The theme was the Ultimate Thrill Ride and the visual certainly works. It’s really cool looking and worked very well. Unfortunately the stadium isn’t the best looking in the world and it made the whole thing feel a bit out of place. Oh and the CRAZY LONG RAMP, which is something like seventy yards long.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Austin Aries vs. Neville

Aries is challenging after Neville has dominated the division for months and needs someone fresh to challenge him. The fans are behind Aries, which isn’t that surprising though Neville was nothing short (ok he was always short) of awesome at this point. Aries takes him down with an armbar but Neville is right back out with a headscissors. Back up and Neville has to bail to the floor so Aries has a rest on the top rope. I know it’s a Shawn Michaels spot but Aries sells the heck out of it.

Neville comes back in and eats a basement dropkick, followed by the middle rope elbow to the back for two. The suicide dive is blocked with a kick to the head though as the back and forth continues. A missile dropkick gives Neville two and we take a break. Back with Neville holding a chinlock (They even do it on the Kickoff Shows!) but taking WAY too long to glare at the crowd before trying a middle rope Phoenix splash (makes sense given his King thing).

One heck of a backdrop puts Neville on the floor and Aries is right back after him with the suicide dive. You can hear the fans getting back into this and that’s a good result from these two. The main reason to put something like this on is to get the fans fired up for the real show and it’s a great place to put them in.

They come back in with Aries blocking the superplex and nailing his own missile dropkick (looked awesome too) for a near fall. A snap German suplex plants Aries though and Neville takes over again. Another suplex gets another two and Neville is starting to look annoyed. With the technical stuff not working, Neville just kicks him in the face in the corner.

Aries is fine enough to reverse the Rings of Saturn attempt into a rollup and now the Discus knocks Neville hard to the floor. Back in and Aries hits a top hurricanrana and the 450 (with a really annoying crowd reaction shot) gets two. The Last Chancery goes on but Neville rips at the eye (which was recently reconstructed) to break the hold. Aries is writhing in pain and it’s the Red Arrow to retain the title at 15:40.

Rating: B. I remember hearing that this would be on the Kickoff Show and being very relieved as I didn’t think the main show would allow it nearly the amount of time that it needed and deserved. I’m glad to see that I was right here as they had a heck of a chess match here with both guys getting in everything they could and showing how back and forth the whole thing was. Neville cheating to win in the end fit him well, as he finally had someone who could match him and had to take a shortcut. Really good stuff here as Neville continues his unbelievable roll.

If the pay per view started here, it would have been a perfect Kickoff Show. But nah, we need two more matches.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Rob Gronkowski, a friend of Mojo Rawley, is in the front row. Big Show’s music plays everyone but Braun Strowman to the ring. Braun tosses Primo two seconds into the match as the ring needs some serious cleaning out. Kalisto and Simon Gotch are tossed as well and Strowman eliminates Slater. Jimmy Uso and Goldust follow them out as they’re not wasting time here.

There goes Konnor but it’s time for the Show vs. Strowman showdown. Everyone stops to watch but Sami jumps Braun due to reasons of general stupidity. That goes nowhere so it’s Strowman dumping Show. Everyone goes after Strowman but he gets rid of Viktor in the process. Strowman is eliminated, making him look like a loser/afterthought in the process (oh….just wait). Hawkins is out and Ziggler gets to do his usual false hope spot. We get into the required “everyone hits everyone but doesn’t really try to win” portion as things slow down.

Ziggler low bridges Truth out as I manage to remember that Truth is employed. There goes Rhyno and Ziggler is thrown over the top, only to hang on again. There goes English, followed by American Alpha dropkicking English out. Jey Uso and Jason Jordan are tossed, followed by Chad Gable as the ring is really thinning out. Tian Bing gets rid of Fandango and Breeze, followed by Henry eliminating Sin Cara (in some sweet Wrestlemania gear). Henry is out next as there’s nothing between these eliminations.

Ziggler superkicks Bing out and that’s about it for Tian’s career accomplishments to date. Sami’s Helluva Kick gets rid of Epico and we’re down to nine. It’s been too long since Ziggler was nearly eliminated so Harper chokes him on the apron this time around. Mojo dumps Bo and Mahal eliminates Crews, followed by Rawley tossing Ziggler. Harper is out next and we’re down to Mojo, Jinder, Titus, Dain and Zayn.

A running clothesline gets rid of Titus but Dain eliminates Sami, completely sucking the life out of the crowd. Why you ask? Well we’re left with Dain, Rawley and Mahal. How excited would you be? Jinder gets clotheslined down and we get a Dain vs. Mojo showdown. A Pounce drops Dain but Jinder pulls Mojo through the ropes and out to the floor. Jinder follows him out and sends Rawley into the barricade, right in front of Gronkowski.

That means a drink going into Gronkowski’s face and here he comes over the barricade. This gives us the funniest part of the show as a security guard runs over to stop him, only to have a ringside guy tap her on the arm as some referees come over and allow Gronkowski to get in. Gronkowski runs Mahal over (your future WWE Champion everyone) and Mojo’s running right hands get rid of Dain. Another running punch to Mahal gives Rawley the win at 14:09.

Rating: D-. And this just LAUNCHED Mojo to the moon right? I know the idea here was to get Gronkowski involved (possibly as a substitute for Shaquille O’Neal) but Sami Zayn was RIGHT THERE to get the big win but nah, let’s go with the nothing guy winning the match. This wasn’t the best result for the battle royal but at least they were trying with Rawley, who took the time to talk to an entire group of fans when I saw him walking through Axxess that same weekend. Hopefully he gets somewhere in the future. The rest of the match was terrible with everyone being thrown out in short order and a bad ending.

Kickoff Show: Intercontinental Title: Baron Corbin vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and I have no idea why this was on the Kickoff Show. Corbin crushed Ambrose underneath a forklift to set this up, giving us the hilarious visual of the referees trying to LIFT IT UP despite the key being in the ignition. They waste no time in fighting to the floor with Dean getting the better of it and heading back inside.

That earns him a hard whip to send Ambrose’s ribs into the post and give Corbin a nice big target. Or 24 of them in this case. A choke shove puts Dean down for two and Baron whips him into the barricade for good measure. We hit the chinlock for a few moments before Dean avoids a charge to send Corbin shoulder first into the post. Corbin avoids the top rope elbow and blocks Dirty Deeds for good measure. That earns him a trip to the floor but Baron knocks him out of the air on a slingshot dive.

The top rope elbow puts Corbin down again though and Dean gets two off a swinging neckbreaker. These two aren’t exactly clicking so far. Deep Six gives Corbin two and works on the ribs a bit more. The Rebound Lariat runs Baron over again but he’s right back with a powerbomb to stay on the ribs. That’s about it for Corbin though as Dean jumps up and hits Dirty Deeds to retain at 10:44.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one but the bigger issue was with the ending, as Baron winning the title would have made the most sense. Making it even worse was the fact that Baron won a street fight non-title rematch two days later but none of that matters as the Superstar Shakeup changed everything a week later. The match was nothing to see either as they didn’t go into the brawl that would have suited them best.

And now on the main show, which is FIVE HOURS AND TEN MINUTES LONG. Sweet goodness and they wonder why it’s hard to make new fans.

Tinashe, who looks like a low rent Beyonce (still very attractive though with a great voice) sings America the Beautiful. This includes the Air Force flyover, which will nearly knock you off your feet.

The opening video is about how everyone wants to come here, either as a fan or as a wrestler. This is the biggest show of the year and it is the ultimate thrill ride. The video turns into a roller coaster, starting with some historic moments and going into clips of wrestlers on tonight’s show. It’s continuing the theme and that’s a good thing when so many of these shows only have a loose theme at best. Ignore the fans cheering for Miz and AJ Styles and booing the heck out of Roman Reigns of course.

Here are your hosts for the evening: the New Day, in Final Fantasy inspired gear, with Kofi riding in on their bicycle powered ice cream cart. I still have one major question: HOW DID THEY NOT HAVE ICE CREAM FOR SALE??? They teased that for weeks and NOTHING. I was looking forward to it but for some reason it just never happened. After some dancing and gyrating, Xavier says there were a lot of options to host the show. Fans: “WOO!” It was your boys the NEW DAY who got the call though and they get to tell us about all the action that we’ll be seeing tonight.

It’s time to officially pulls their levers (making Kofi and Xavier cringe) and Big E. starts sending the smiling glances over to Woods as he freaks out. This was just after the sex tape fiasco, which was hinted at but never mentioned on WWE TV. In other words, this was a nice little inside joke for the fans while not giving away anything that would be un-PG. Well done and the way this needed to be handled. New Day’s level of rock is confirmed and that’s it, wrapping up this year’s installment of an unnecessary addition to the Wrestlemania card.

We recap AJ Styles babysitting Shane McMahon. AJ lost the Smackdown World Title to John Cena at the Royal Rumble and Daniel Bryan/Shane put him in the Elimination Chamber instead of giving him a one on one rematch for the title. That’s not cool with AJ, so he beat up Shane to set up this year’s “Shane can totally wrestle if you give him one of the best performers in the world” match. They’ve attacked each other a few times each since with Shane’s punches somehow getting a little worse since last year.

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Shane’s kids are at ringside because what would Wrestlemania be without them? AJ isn’t interested in throwing punches so a quick standing switch sends Shane into the ropes. A headlock and snapmare have Shane down as AJ is toying with him to start. Shane gets in some armdrags and takes Styles down for a rollup, giving us some frustration to send AJ outside.

Back in and AJ punches him in the face as it turns into a boxing match. You know you don’t have to ask Shane to do that twice so we let the suck fly, followed by an elbow to AJ’s face. One heck of a baseball slide sends Shane over the announcers’ table as control goes hard to Styles. Back in and a knee drop rocks Shane again but of course he can shake off the Phenomenal Blitz.

The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up and Shane starts his dance that was stupid back in the 90s so today it’s awesome (like everything in the Attitude Era). An Angle Slam gets two on AJ but he’s right back with the Calf Crusher. Shane reverses into a rear naked choke, a cross armbreaker and something like the Rings of Saturn. He trains MMA you see. AJ shrugs them off and drops Shane again but the springboard 450 is countered into a triangle choke. That’s reversed into a one armed Styles Clash, and of course Shane is up at two.

They slug it out and the fans are entirely behind AJ, even more than you might have expected them to be. I know he’s going to be the favorite coming in but this star treatment of Shane is making it even worse. The ref gets bumped (well duh) and it’s trashcan time. AJ loads up his own Coast to Coast but Shane throws the can at him (with AJ having to pull up on the dive, making it look horrible). Phillips: “AJ has stepped into Shane’s world now!” You mean high flying wrestling?

Shane’s Coast to Coast gets two and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. The big elbow misses but of course Shane is fine enough to counter the Phenomenal Forearm into a Maiavia Hurricane. That’s not enough from Shane though as he gets to try the shooting star, which only hits mat. The Phenomenal Forearm connects to finally put Shane away at 20:31.

Rating: B. Well that was Shane, with some Shane on the side and then more Shane to wrap it up. AJ looked awesome but that’s all he supposed to be. This was all about Shane getting to counter and hang with AJ, which doesn’t do Styles any good. A 40+ year old who doesn’t wrestle shouldn’t be hanging with a guy who was World Champion less than three months ago. But hey, Shane, right?

James Ellsworth is having issues working out so Ric Flair comes in to give him a Snickers. Then Ellsworth becomes Charlotte. Uh, yeah.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens. Their friendship had been having some issues of late so Jericho put together the Festival of Friendship, an over the top celebration of all things Owens and Jericho. At the end of it, Owens turns on Jericho and beat the heck out of him. Jericho came back and cost him the Universal Title at Fastlane so Owens is coming for Jericho’s Universal Title. The question became could Owens win without Jericho and now we get the chance to find out.

US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is challenging. Jericho’s entrance brings back the countdown for a nice touch. Throw in the light up scarf and a big List of Jericho on the stage and this is advantage Chris. They slug it out to start with the Walls going on less than thirty seconds in. That sends Owens bailing to the floor and a top rope forearm to the head drops Owens back inside. Owens kicks him in the face and hammers away to take over.

We hit the chinlock, with some horribly obvious spot calling, followed by the backsplash for two. They head outside for the third time with Jericho backdropping his way out of the apron powerbomb. Jericho chops away and gets two off a super hurricanrana but gets clotheslined down. The frog splash misses, the Lionsault hits knees, and the Swanton hits knees as well to give us a slow down stretch.

Now the Lionsault connects for a delayed two but Owens gets in his own Walls of Jericho. A rope is grabbed so Owens tries the Cannonball, only to be reversed into the Walls. Kevin grabs the rope for the break and is right back with the Pop Up Powerbomb for two. Another Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into the Codebreaker but Owens touches the rope with one finger for the save. That’s a sweet heel touch. Owens rolls outside and superkicks the knee, setting up the apron powerbomb to give him the pin and the title at 16:46.

Rating: C+. Not bad but they never cranked up the violence that you would have expected after seeing the Festival of Friendship. These two should have been ready to destroy each other and instead it’s just a match with Owens working the ribs and looking for a powerbomb. They accomplished the goal of making Owens look like he can win on his own, but this isn’t the way they should have gone about it.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match. Charlotte and Sasha Banks had raised the women’s division to entirely new levels and Charlotte needed a new challenger. Enter Bayley, who won the title on Raw in a big surprise, completely defeating the purpose of her character and leaving her with nothing to do. This problem would plague her for the next year and still does to this day. Nia Jax was added to the other three because you need to have as many people in Wrestlemania matches as possible.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending under elimination rules. The tube men are at ringside for a special change of pace. Sasha rides in on the back of a chauffeured car because that’s what Sasha does. Charlotte gets a crazy amount of pyro, making her look even more like a star than usual. Everyone goes after Nia to start but she wrecks them in increasingly short order. A Banzai Drop crushes Bayley and Nia throws Charlotte off the apron onto both Bayley and Sasha. There’s something about people being thrown around like weapons.

All three get together to go after Nia with Sasha wisely grabbing the leg to keep her in place. Charlotte boots Nia in the face for a double German suplex for two in a painful looking crash. Nia is back up and tries a second Banzai, only to get TripleBombed out of the corner for the elimination at 4:08.

As usual, Nia chokes in the big match because that’s just how she rolls. Charlotte pulls Bayley to the floor and it’s Sasha hitting a flip dive to take the champ down. As you might expect, it’s the corkscrew moonsault from the top to take Bayley and Sasha down again in a huge crash.

Back in and Natural Selection is countered into a failed Bank Statement attempt. Instead Charlotte gets two off a backbreaker and rips off a turnbuckle pad in frustration. Sasha’s top rope double knees are good for two of her own and the Bank Statement goes on. Sasha goes with a rollup and the kickout sends her face first into the buckle for the elimination at 8:10.

Bayley comes back in and gets her knee rammed into the exposed buckle. The moonsault, with the wind blowing Charlotte’s hair around, only hits mat to give Bayley a near fall. Charlotte is fine enough to go after the knee and grab the Figure Eight. Bayley gets to the rope so Charlotte takes her into the Tree of Woe, only to get backdropped from the top in a big crash. The big elbow is enough to retain the title at 12:04.

Rating: D. Why can’t they get these big matches right? This was completely backwards with Nia being thrown in there at the last minute and lasting all of four minutes. Then it’s Bayley not really overcoming the odds and just pinning Charlotte after shrugging off some of the offense. It’s not some come from behind win or a big moment, but really just a match where Charlotte happened to lose.

Video on the Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Hearing Jim Cornette’s voice in WWE is just wrong.

Diamond Dallas Page. Nice reaction and WELL deserved just for his stuff with Hall and Roberts alone.

Rock N Roll Express. WAY overdue.

Rick Rude. See the Rock N Roll Express.

Teddy Long. I defy you to not smile at this.

Eric LeGrand. Warrior Award and that’s fine.

Beth Phoenix. Fine enough if a female entrant is required.

Kurt Angle. Yep. Moving on.

Support the Boys and Girls Club! Fair request actually.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

No real story here as this is they’ve just been feuding and it’s time for a title match. Anderson and Gallows are defending and this is a ladder match because we have to have one. Enzo and Cass’ speech is short this time as they say they’re climbing every rung to win the titles. We’re ready to go….and here’s New Day. Yeah remember them?

Anyway they’re in wrestling gear here but first, an announcement. This is now a FATAL FOUR WAY with one more team to be added. That would be the HARDY BOYZ, making a shocking return and giving us a legitimate Wrestlemania moment. Before the music hit, I stood up and said “they wouldn’t”, which was aided as I couldn’t see that New Day was in ring gear. Amazing moment here and the twenty six million YouTube views suggest that it’s quite the popular idea. Cole says thinks are about to be BROKEN and Matt does the DELETE pose.

It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) and the Hardys waste no time with Poetry in Motion to Gallows. Enzo and Cass are taken down as well as the fans are entire enamored with the Hardys all over again. A Whisper in the Wind takes both Sheamus and Cesaro down and it’s time for the first ladder. Jeff goes up but it’s Gallows making a pretty easy save. Cesaro comes back in and climbs onto Gallows’ shoulders for a double stomp onto Anderson’s ribs. Well that worked.

This time it’s Enzo and Cass coming in, just to make sure that everyone gets their turn in you see. That goes nowhere so the Hardys bridge the ladders between the ring and the apron but Cesaro and Sheamus slam them together. With a little too much Sheamus on offense, Cass launches Enzo over the ladders like a cannonball to take him down.

Back in and Sheamus hits the ten forearms to Gallows while Cesaro Swings Anderson. Despite what Cole thinks, that’s not exactly working together. We hear about the Tag Team Titles not changing hands at Wrestlemania in SIXTEEN YEARS (that’s inexcusable) until Sheamus Brogue Kicks the heck out of Cass. Enzo shoves the ladder over to drop Gallows and Sheamus and goes up, sending Graves into hysterics over the horrible possibilities.

Sheamus and Gallows come back in for the save but don’t bother to knock him off the ladder. Instead it’s Anderson climbing the ladder and knocking Cesaro into the ladder. There’s a Magic Killer to Cesaro but Matt hits them both with a Twist of Fate, including a big one off of the ladder to Anderson. Jeff hits the required Swanton off the ladder to drive Cesaro through a bridged ladder, leaving Matt to pull the titles down at 11:05.

Rating: C+. There’s only so much you can get out of a ladder match like this with almost nothing to it other than the big Hardys return. That being said, they absolutely got the ending right as there was no other way to go here. Enzo and Cass weren’t going to work after something as special as the Hardys showing up so don’t even try. There wasn’t much to this in the way of high spots either, but this was ALL about Matt and Jeff, as it should have been.

Jimmy Fallon is here.

We recap the Miz/Maryse vs. John Cena/Nikki Bella, which is mostly about Nikki and Cena teaming together for the first time ever. The idea is that Cena won’t marry Nikki so Miz and Maryse are better, meaning we’re just waiting on Cena to pop the question here. In the show stealing moment of the year though, Miz and Maryse did some parody videos of Cena and Nikki and Total Divas/Bellas, giving us some of the funniest things WWE has ever done.

They nailed the ridiculous nature of the shows to perfection and made Miz look like the guy who should be ready to break through every ceiling above her. Oh and Maryse as Nikki Bella: sweet GOODNESS that worked on about a million levels. Finally though, a year later with Miz and Maryse now as parents, Cena’s jokes about Miz “firing blanks” are pretty much dead.

Jerry Lawler is on commentary.

Nikki Bella/John Cena vs. Maryse/The Miz

Al Roker is guest ring announcer for absolutely no reason whatsoever other than having a celebrity appearance. This is Maryse’s first match nearly six years and she doesn’t look like she’s lost a step. Cena and Nikki run down the ramp and we see a wide shot for a cool visual. Cena’s mom is in the front row and he seems shocked to see her, which would be a heck of a surprise.

The women start and there’s no contact for a minute so let’s bring in the guys instead. Miz poses on the ropes and then bails to the floor to start a chase. Back in and Miz finally stomps away as we finally make contact nearly two minutes in. Maryse gets in a poke to the eye so Miz can fire off a left hand. Cena and Nikki have had no offense so far. The fans are very pleased with Miz’s beating of Cena, mainly because they realize how awesome those Total Bellas parodies were.

Miz misses the running clothesline in the corner but Maryse breaks up the hot tag attempt by pulling Nikki off the apron. A DDT gives Miz two and he slowly does Daniel Bryan’s pose (How amazing is it that the match could ACTUALLY HAPPEN?). The YES Kicks keep Cena rocked but Miz makes the mistake of telling Nikki that she can’t see him.

A big slap puts Miz on the floor and a diving tag brings in Nikki. Some bad forearms to Maryse’s arms (Shane could do better than that) don’t do much damage so Nikki runs Miz over instead. Back in and Nikki’s big forearm sets up stereo Five Knuckle Shuffles. The AA and a Rack Attack 2.0 give us a double pin at 9:38.

Rating: D-. What in the world was that? Miz beat Cena up for about eight minutes and then it was hot tag Nikki to put the villains away Hogan style. After all the work and amazing promos, this is Miz’s Wrestlemania reward. I’m so glad this is what they went with instead of Cena vs. Undertaker, which was likely possible at this show. But hey, Total Divas and Total Bellas got a plot out of it.

Post match Cena says this is what Nikki wanted when she was rehabbing her neck. He tells a downright creepy story about Nikki being groggy before going inf or surgery. Apparently Cena asked if Nikki knew he would marry her one day. She said yes, and today is that day. Cena proposes and we get the big moment as she says yes. I’m SO glad this is what Cena, in the final few years that he has in WWE, is spending one of them doing this. It’s a sweet moment, but my goodness do this on Total Bellas where the fans want to see it.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. HHH, in another dumb story. So Rollins was HHH’s big ace in the hole a few years back and everything was all evil and great. Then Rollins tore his ACL and had to vacate the World Title, which HHH took as not being good enough to be the top guy. Let me repeat that: HHH said that leg issues were signs that someone wasn’t good enough to be the man in WWE. HHH then cost the returning Rollins the title to turn him face but now it’s time for revenge with a fired up Rollins wanting to burn the place down to destroy HHH.

Seth Rollins vs. HHH

Anything goes and, as usual, HHH gets the coolest entrance of the night with a big motorcycle and a police escort, plus Stephanie as a CRAZY HOT biker chick. Seriously, I know she can be irritating but she can rock the heck out of some leather pants. He gets the biggest entrance every year and it takes up a bunch of the spotlight but I can live with it if she’s in outfits like that.

Rollins’ entrance involves holding up a torch and touching it to the ground, sending digital flames down the ramp. I get the burn it down thing but it’s rather lame, along with coming after the really cool entrance. Well done again HHH, as he continues to be smarter than most wrestlers today.

They waste no time in slugging it out with Rollins getting the better of it (therefore I must remind you: HHH once won a slugout with modern day Brock Lesnar) to knock HHH outside. A dragon screw legwhip takes Rollins down by the knee that wasn’t hurt in the first place. Rollins shrugs it off and punches him away, followed by an enziguri back inside. The suicide dive sends HHH into the barricade and it’s already time for the announcers’ table. As usual, Rollins tries a Pedigree onto the table but gets countered with a DDT which doesn’t break the table.

HHH cranks up the violence with a chair to the knee before bridging Rollins’ knee between the ring and the table so he can drive his own knee into Rollins’. Back in and the slow knee work continues, because that’s how HHH loves to work on a show this big. Rollins tries the sunset bomb but hurts his knee all over again. It’s fine enough to hit the Buckle Bomb and a hard whip sends HHH over the corner to the floor. With HHH staggered, Rollins goes up top (Graves: “He’s screwed if he hits this or not.”) and scores with a high crossbody to the floor.

Since it’s an anything goes match, Rollins loads up a pair of chairs and a table on the floor instead of just bashing HHH with the chair. A frog splash to the back keeps HHH down but he kicks the knee out to cut Rollins off again. HHH takes forever to get up top though and gets a chair pelted at his head, setting up the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two. You know, on the bad knee.

Stephanie breaks up the Phoenix Splash by pulling the knee onto the ropes and we hit a reverse Figure Four. That’s reversed into a Gargano Escape of all things but HHH goes smart by punching him in the knee. The reverse Figure Four goes on outside so Rollins reaches underneath the ring to find weapons. Naturally this includes the sledgehammer but HHH lets the hold go.

Back in and Rollins’ knee is fine enough for a low superkick to the face, followed by an enziguri to really hammer the point home. Stephanie takes the hammer away from Rollins though and a Pedigree gives HHH two. The fans barely even reacted to that one and I can’t say I blame them.

HHH channels his inner CM Punk and loads up a super Pedigree but gets backdropped down (already done by Bayley earlier). Now the Phoenix Splash gets two but neither can hit a Pedigree. Instead HHH hits him in the knee but walks into a superkick, which knocks Stephanie off the apron and through a table. That wakes the fans WAY up just in time for the Pedigree to give Rollins the pin at 25:25.

Rating: B-. This is an interesting one I was bored out of my mind watching it live but it flies by watching it back. That being said, the constant knee work got very dull, especially when it wasn’t even Rollins’ bad knee. As usual, the Stephanie bump got by far the strongest reaction of the night because it’s something you don’t see very often. It’s not a bad match at all but you EASILY could have chopped off ten minutes and no one would have missed a thing.

Pitbull performs the theme song and eats up way too much time.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt for the Smackdown World Title. Orton joined the Wyatt Family after becoming tired of being beaten down by the team. Then he won the Royal Rumble and promised to never cash in the title shot on new champion Wyatt. It wound up being a ruse though and Orton used his newfound access to the Wyatt Family compound to destroy the whole place. Then Bray poured Sister Abigail’s ashes over himself and gained her powers as this story got REALLY stupid. There was also something about Luke Harper nearly becoming #1 contender that went nowhere but warrants a quick mention.

Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and has a viper go down the ramp, which he himself called stupid. We get the Big Match Intros and Orton takes him down with a Thesz press and some right hands. They head to the floor for more right hands but Bray goes caveman with a running headbutt back inside. And then the lights go out (which I thought was a blackout) until the mat is covered with a projection of maggots. We’re about two minutes into the match and this is already in the pantheon of dumbest ideas ever.

Bray runs him over again and this time it’s worms on the mat. The referee jumps out of the ring, possibly because he wants to go work for a sensible company like TNA. A Rock Bottom into a backsplash gives Bray two but Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two. I mean, it doesn’t matter as they’ve completely lost the fans after that stupid, STUPID idea but never let that stop WWE.

They head outside again with Bray diving off the apron and straight into a dropkick. Sister Abigail into the barricade drops Orton again but he’s back up with an RKO to knock Bray silly on the floor. That’s only good for two back inside and Sister Abigail is countered into the backbreaker. Orton’s hanging DDT looks to set up the RKO but this time Sister Abigail connects for two. But hang on because let’s hit those roaches to complete the trio of stupid! Orton is finally done with all this nonsense and hits the RKO for the pin and the title at 10:13.

Rating: F. You are the winter, fall and spring. You are the sun that summertime brings. You are the stars in the nighttime sky. You are my girl and I’m your guy. You got me all tied up in knots and I’m lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m just lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m lovin’ you lots and lots.

That doesn’t make sense? Neither does what we just saw. Moving on.

The pilots from the flyover are here. That’s kind of cool.

We recap the Universal Title match, which all started because of a video game. Goldberg came back at Survivor Series to face Brock Lesnar in a rematch of the nightmare that was Wrestlemania XX. In a shocker, Goldberg won in about a minute and a half. Then it was decided that Goldberg could win the title again. He went on to eliminate Brock from the Royal Rumble and then won the Universal Title in about thirty seconds at Fastlane. Lesnar needed to defeat Goldberg once and for all so we’re having the match for the title tonight. This is all narrated by Paul Heyman, who talks about fantasies coming to an end in a nice touch.

Here’s the thing: you could do this same story without the title. Have Lesnar put up his career to get one more shot at Goldberg (it’s not like there was any doubt on the winner here anyway) so let us have the original plan: Owens dropping the title to Jericho (who never won the World Title as a face) and then Lesnar winning it the next month. Nah. We need GOLDBERG winning the title in a nostalgia moment for whatever reason.

Universal Title: Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Goldberg is defending and gets the long walk to the ring which might as well be the long walk to the gallows. Lesnar wastes no time and hits three German suplexes in nineteen seconds. In a great visual, the camera is on Lesnar when Goldberg cuts him down with a spear. A second spear sends Lesnar bailing and the third spear takes Lesnar through the barricade. That’s the first MINUTE of this match as they’re certainly starting fast.

Back in and both finishers are escaped, setting up another spear to Lesnar. The Jackhammer gets two, making Lesnar the second person to ever kick out (the other being Hogan, who only did it because of a missed cue). That means another spear (Heyman: “HE’S IN POSITION AGAIN!”) but this time Lesnar leapfrogs him and Goldberg hits the buckles. More suplexes (make it ten total) set up the F5 to officially conquer Goldberg at 4:47.

Rating: B. This was PERFECT for what they had to work with. Goldberg wasn’t going to be out there for a long match (he didn’t in his prime either) and they went with the right path. This was as action packed of a nearly five minute match as all you could have done. That first spear looked awesome and Goldberg gets to go out on his big moment. I’m pleased, though not as much as Goldberg, who probably made a ton of money for less than ten minutes combined of wrestling time in his comeback.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Naomi vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Alexa is defending and this is the most thrown together match that I can remember in a good while. They’re also rushing through the entrances due to the time issues. You know, because NOW they care about time issues. Naomi is the hometown girl and MY GOODNESS the Glow entrance is a sight to behold in a stadium. There are no tags of course so it’s a big brawl to start.

Naomi gets sent to the floor for a double suplex from Natalya and Carmella. Back in and Becky kicks the two of them down but James Ellsworth (Remember that?) grabs Becky’s foot to take over. Bliss breaks up a cover and screams at Carmella to get out of her ring. The DDT gets two on Natalya but Becky breaks it up this time, only to have Ellsworth come in. No Chin Music is countered into a Bexploder and it’s Naomi coming back in this time.

Naomi slingshots in to sunset flip Natalya, who German suplexes Becky at the same time. Speaking of the same time, Natalya tries a double Sharpshooter on Carmella and Naomi but can’t get the legs up. Well, not surprising, but it’s so bad that the camera cuts to her back. Naomi comes back in for a Rear View to Bliss and a big dive to take everyone out. Back in and Naomi’s reverse Rings of Saturn makes Bliss tap for the title at 5:33.

Rating: D. The timing issues KILLED this and there’s no way around it. Much like the ladder match earlier, there’s nothing you can do when you have five minutes and six people in a match. Naomi winning the title back is cool, but I still have no idea why her winning it back in her hometown is supposed to be some huge deal. Yeah it’s cool, but it’s not like this is some great moment.

Wrestlemania XXXIV is in New Orleans. Those songs will drive you crazy by the end of the weekend.

New Day comes out to thank the fans for the record attendance of 75,245. The team is still funny but egads they could have been cut out of this whole thing and not been missed.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Undertaker. Reigns eliminated him from the Rumble and now we have a match to determine who is the real Big Dog.

Jim Ross is out to do commentary for the main event. That’s even more impressive when you consider his wife died days before this show.

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

No holds barred, first announced before the entrances. Reigns is booed out of the stadium, as has become a custom. In a smart move, Undertaker rises from the middle of the ramp (with a cool visual of smoke building up and clearing to reveal him standing there). I completely missed this as I was looking at the stage and then glanced down to the ring and saw him climbing the steps.

Undertaker slugs away in the corner to start and knocks Reigns to the floor. Back in and Reigns knocks him over the top as well, with Undertaker landing on his feet. Reigns hammers him down to take over and they head outside so this can be more of a brawl, which is the only way to go. The apron dropkick (to a standing Undertaker) puts Undertaker down again but he wins a slugout back inside. Reigns hits him in the face and Undertaker just looks mad.

Snake Eyes and the big boot set up the legdrop for two. The threat of a chokeslam sends Reigns outside again and this time the apron dropkick is punched out of the air. Another dropkick staggers Undertaker but it’s a chokeslam onto the announcers’ table. They climb onto the other tables and it’s a spear to drive Undertaker through (almost in a running spinebuster) for the double knockout.

Reigns is the only one back in….and Undertaker sits up. Back in and Reigns does the corner clotheslines into the corner right hands, meaning the Last Ride (an AWFUL one at that with little impact and more Undertaker dropping Reigns than slamming him down). It’s chair time but Undertaker takes it away and beats him down instead. A quick Superman Punch knocks Undertaker into the ropes but another is countered into a chokeslam onto the chair.

The Tombstone gets two and the fans, who are supposed to be smart at Wrestlemania, seem shocked at the kickout. Off the first Tombstone. In a Wrestlemania match. Who’s the smart one here? Another Tombstone is loaded up but this time Reigns backflips….and just can’t lift Undertaker for the counter. They try a few more times but just stop for the sake of embarrassment with Reigns trying a Superman Punch instead.

The spear connects but Undertaker is fine enough to put on Hell’s Gate. The rope is reached for a break (erg) and Reigns unloads with the chair. Another spear gets another two and another spear gets another two and another Superman Punch (Undertaker sits up and falls over) sets up another spear to give Undertaker his second Wrestlemania loss at 22:57. That last sequence took nearly five minutes.

Rating: D+. It’s not terrible, but Undertaker looked like an old man who should have hung it up a few years ago. The problem here was the crowd being completely dead and it showed really badly. There’s only so much energy you can have in an academic match at the end of a seven hour show. Reigns winning makes complete sense but it was a bad match (the botches and CRAZY amount of time spent standing around didn’t do it any favors) and there’s no way around that.

Reigns gets the big pyro display behind him as he stands on the ramp (great shot) but we’re not done yet. Undertaker slowly sits up and we go to a bunch of replays. Back to live and it’s Undertaker standing in the ring with the hat and coat on. I use that term loosely as it looks like Mark Callaway standing there dressed as Undertaker. For the first time, it seems like we’re seeing the real person instead of the character, which is a MAJOR change for him.

He looks around to the crowd, takes off his gloves, coat and hat and folds them up in the ring. With the fans applauding, he goes outside, kisses Michelle McCool, and walks up the ramp. Undertaker stops, looks back one more time, raises the fist, and lowers down through the ramp, fist still in the air, to end the show with the gong sounding one more time. There was no commentary for the last ten minutes, without even a goodbye (appropriate here).

That’s about as perfect of a sendoff as WWE has ever done. It was emotional, it felt special, and it came off like the real thing. Undertaker is the last vestige of that older generation and him breaking character for the first time ever and leaving is incredible to see. It’s why I don’t want to see him wrestle again and why it makes me sad to think that he will. Incredible stuff, and Thank You Taker.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s no way around it: this show is way way way way way way way WAY too long. I got through an hour of the show a few days back (you know I’m not watching this in one sitting) and looked down at the bar in near horror of how little space I had covered. Five hours, plus TWO HOURS of a Kickoff Show is just too much, especially when there’s stuff to be cut. What could be cut? Well off the top of my head:

AJ vs. Shane (move AJ to ANYTHING else and drop Shane) entirely or at least cut it down by about eight minutes

Corbin vs. Ambrose (I know it’s the Intercontinental Title but on a show this huge, it’s understandable)

Smackdown Women’s Title (it’s just nothing and felt like total filler)

Five to ten minutes each off of Reigns vs. Undertaker and HHH vs. Rollins (those combine for nearly fifty minutes total)

Pitbull

AT LEAST get this down to four and a half hours of main show. That can’t be too much to ask, right?

Other than the timing issues though, the show is mostly solid. There’s a ton of good stuff up until the mixed tag and then things start to fall apart. The Universal Title match was as perfect as it was going to be get but there’s just so much bad around it (Bray vs. Orton, Reigns vs. Undertaker, HHH vs. Rollins in that match that is still going on somewhere, with HHH still working the knee) that the good is dragged down.

At the end of the day, it all comes back to the timing issues as there’s almost no way to make a show this long work. It’s too much to sit through and it becomes a chore at the end. Just cut this down by a good hour (or two) and things are much better, but bigger is better for WWE and that’s not changing anytime soon. As it is, the show works more than it misses but it’s still not a classic by any means.

Ratings Comparison

Neville vs. Austin Aries

Original: A-

2018 Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C+

2018 Redo: C-

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Charlotte vs. Nia Jax

Original: C-

2018 Redo: D

Hardy Boyz vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

John Cena/Nikki Bella vs. The Miz/Maryse

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

HHH vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

2018 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Original: F

2018 Redo: F

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Naomi vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Original: D-

2018 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Yeah I overrated a lot of this the first time around. It’s good, but not that good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/04/07/wrestlemania-xxxiii-a-long-wait-for-a-long-show-with-a-long-ramp/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Wrestlemania XXXII
Date: April 3, 2016
Location: AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Texas
Attendance: 101,763
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

As we get ready for the pre-show matches, the place might be 10% full at this point as there was some confusion in opening the gates. There were no lines and it was just a sea of humanity trying to get inside.

Pre-Show: Ryback vs. Kalisto

Ryback plants him off a headlock and easily throws the champ outside. Kalisto gets in a quick bulldog for two but the kickout sends him outside. Some double knees to the chest get the same result and Ryback gets to show off by gorilla pressing Kalisto up the steps and back inside. We take a break and come back with Kalisto taking a hard elbow to the jaw for two.

Team Total Divas vs. Team B.A.D. and Blonde

Total Divas: Natalya, Brie Bella, Paige, Alicia Fox, Eva Marie

B.A.D. and Blonde: Naomi, Lana, Summer Rae, Tamina, Emma

Post match Nikki Bella comes out in her neck brace in what is supposed to be some big moment.

Usos vs. Dudley Boyz

Post match the Dudleyz load up some tables but get splashed through them instead. Cool visual if nothing else.

Fifth Harmony sings a very nice rendition of America the Beautiful.

Inter-continental Title: Kevin Owens vs. The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder vs. Stardust vs. Sin Cara vs. Sami Zayn

Cara hits the big dive to put Stardust through the ladder, leaving Owens and Zayn to slug it out above the ring. Sami gets the better of it and hits the half and half suplex to drop Owens head first into a ladder (sick looking landing). That lets Sami go up until Miz shoves him over but this time Miz takes too long going up, earning himself a big shove off from Ryder, who climbs the ladder for the huge upset at 15:24.

AJ Styles vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho drives him into the corner to start and the AJ STYLES chants are already going nice and strong. Styles gets in a hurricanrana and a snappy armdrag before sending Jericho outside. That should mean a slingshot dive but Jericho dropkicks him out of the air to take over. Back in and a neckbreaker sets up a dragon sleeper for a change of pace.

AJ tries to fight back but gets pulled down into the Walls for some good old fashioned ASK HIM/AHHHH exchanges. A rope is grabbed so AJ can hit the moonsault into a reverse DDT for two. Both guys head to the corner for a super sitout gordbuster and one heck of a crash. The Pele is countered into a Walls attempt but AJ reverses that into the Calf Crusher.

The Styles Clash is broken up and a Codebreaker gets a delayed two (with Cole making sure to say the near fall was due to the delay in a nice touch). For a change of pace, Jericho loads up AJ for the Styles Clash but gets planted face first for two instead. A rollup exchange sets up the real Styles Clash for two and the springboard 450 gets the same. With nothing else left, AJ heads to the apron and loads up the Phenomenal Forearm, only to have Jericho shove the referee away and catch Styles with the Codebreaker for the pin at 17:08.

New Day vs. League of Nations

Dean Ambrose vs. Brock Lesnar

Anything goes and Heyman gives Brock a big, over the top intro. JBL gives us a good example of trying to be too smart by calling Lesnar a former NWA Champion (assuming he means NCAA), which of course he never won. Brock hits the first suplex inside of ten seconds and the huge video screen above the ring kept count (It had been all over the place all night with unicorns for the New Day and various three camera shot replays. In other words, it was annoying in a hurry.).

Hall of Fame time with a pretty good class:

Godfather (So completely out of place here.)

Stan Hansen (How was he not in already?)

Joan Lunden (Warrior Award, which seems to have been forgotten this year.)

Fabulous Freebirds (You could argue they were the headliners.)

Snoop Dogg (Harmless. Not exactly PG but harmless.)

Sting (Only entrance and the loudest reaction.)

Everyone trades rollups to start in a fast and pretty athletic sequence until Charlotte kicks Becky in the face. That earns a nice round of applause and you can tell the women are ready tonight. A hurricanrana sends Charlotte across the ring and Sasha throws in an Eddie dance. They botch (not bad) a sunset flip/German suplex spot before Charlotte it sent outside, leaving Sasha to elbow Becky in the face.

Charlotte poses and gets some pyro to really make this special.

The Cell is lowered for the 33^rd time in WWE history. That stat kind of pulls things back a bit no?

Shane McMahon vs. Undertaker

Rating: D-. WAY too long here with a match that should have been a glorified squash (which this was) that ran only about half this long. The idea that Shane could hang in there with Undertaker under these or any circumstances (including a bunch of run-ins, which never happened), is a combination of insulting and stupid.

The pre-show panel chats for a bit.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Konnor gets rid of Page a few seconds later as this is already pretty dull stuff. The yet to be official Golden Truth eliminates Konnor and Tatanka goes on a warpath that no one was asking for. Corbin tosses Tatanka to no reaction and Kane backdrops Swagger out. The Social Outcasts of all people clean house and get rid of Goldust and Truth. We get a victory lap until Kane and Corbin get rid of Rose and Axel.

Wrestlemania XXXIII is in Orlando.

The Rock vs. Erick Rowan

Rock Bottom, six seconds. Again, I saw this called Rock burying the Wyatts. You know, because people are worried about ERICK ROWAN needing protection.

WWE World Title: Roman Reigns vs. HHH

Rating: D. And a lot of that is just for having the guts to go out there and do a match this boring in this spot on this show. This match was twelve minutes of HHH working on the arm and then getting into the main event style that went exactly where we knew it was going. The lack of drama or really anything interesting (save for that Stephanie spear) killed this and there was no recovering given how long the thing ran.

A quick celebration sets up the traditional long music video to wrap things up.

Ratings Comparison

Zack Ryder vs. Stardust vs. Sin Cara vs. Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens vs. The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: B

Redo: B

AJ Styles vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

Redo: B

New Day vs. League of Nations

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: D+

Redo: C+

Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Shane McMahon vs. Undertaker

Original: D

Redo: D-

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D

The Rock vs. Erick Rowan

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

HHH vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

Oh yeah I was still feeling the in-person vibe when I watched this back the first time. A C- is WAY too generous.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/04/08/wrestlemania-xxxii-strap-yourselves-in-this-is-a-long-one/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 21, 2022
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton

There are two Raws left before Wrestlemania and that means WWE needs to really hammer things home. That is how it should go at least, but you never can tell with what this company is going to do. I’m sure Seth Rollins will be all Wile E. Coyote with one dumb idea after another on his way to his ultimate goal of doing anything at Wrestlemania so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the glass shattering and it’s….Kevin Owens, in an Austin shirt, jean shorts, and a bald cap. Owens does a good enough Austin impression as he insults the crowd for falling for the gag and promises to destroy Austin once and for all at Wrestlemania. Then the glass shatters again, but fool me once and all that, as Owens gets to laugh at the people.

After another threat to Austin, Owens calls for some beers (Steve Austin lagers of course) but can’t catch them. Therefore he yells at the guy to bring them into the ring and Stuns him before pouring some lager over him. You could write this step by step from the second the glass shattered and that’s how it should have been. Sometimes you need to play it by numbers instead of going nuts and screwing something up and they got it as right as they could here.

We look back at Seth Rollins going a bit nuts last week and losing to Kevin Owens for the rights to interview Steve Austin at Wrestlemania.

Rollins doesn’t like the suggestion that he isn’t going to Wrestlemania and starts laughing maniacally. Ignore the CODY chants as he steals the microphone.

Mysterios vs. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode

Miz is on commentary as Dominik grabs a springboard wristdrag out to the floor. Back in and a powerbomb/neckbreaker combination puts Dominik down so Rey comes in for the save attempt. The Mysterios clear the ring for stereo dives to the floor and….here’s Seth Rollins. He wants a Wrestlemania spot and he is going to get one, even if his mic keeps giving out out.

Rollins wants the biggest thing at Wrestlemania that will live forever but since his mic gives out, we take a break. Back with Rollins gone and Rey fighting out of a superplex attempt. Dominik comes back in with a high crossbody to Roode, who is right back with a spinebuster for two. The frustration sets in, allowing Dominik to hit a 619 into the frog splash for the pin at 9:30.

Rating: C-. You can only get so much when a large section of the match was spent on looking at Rollins fighting with the microphone. The Mysterios are a team that should make sense on paper but they just aren’t clicking no matter how WWE presents them. That is a problem that WWE is going to have to deal with somehow, but I’ll take it over Dominik getting a singles push at this rate.

Post match Ziggler hits Rey with a superkick and Miz grabs a Skull Crushing Finale on the floor. Miz even steals the mask and the fans freak out as Rey covers his face with a towel.

Seth Rollins is with Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce and explains that he wants to do something at Wrestlemania. Pearce says this isn’t the way to go about it but maybe there is something he and Deville can do. Rollins laughs and walks off.

Miz is on the phone when he is interrupted to be asked about stealing the mask. It turns out that Logan Paul was a big Rey Mysterio fan growing up and he just wanted a mask. The lesson Paul needs to learn is to never meet your heroes, because they can be horrible. Now it is time for Paul to beat up his heroes at Wrestlemania, but first, Miz dares Paul to wear the mask next week on Raw.

Smackdown Breakdown, this week all about Brock Lesnar trying to destroy the Bloodline.

Omos vs. Apollo Crews/Commander Azeez

Crews and Azeez jump him before the bell but Omos grabs them by their throats on the floor. They get back in for the opening bell, with Omos hitting a one armed slam. The chokeslam to Crews sets up the double pin at 1:45.

Post match Omos promises to dominate anyone at Wrestlemania.

Video on Edge’s recent trip over the, uh, edge.

Here is the returning AJ Styles for a chat. AJ talks about how he has been gone for a few weeks and that much time is a dangerous thing. He has been watching that clip of Edge attacking him over and over and now he has to see Edge with his mood lighting, asking why. Styles doesn’t care because all he wants to do is kick Edge’s teeth down his throat. Instead, he gets Seth Rollins, who, after hearing the CODY chants, says that rumors don’t make moments.

Rollins has an idea: AJ stays at home for Wrestlemania and Rollins ends Edge’s career instead! Styles passes on the idea, saying that if he can walk, he’ll be facing Edge. This is just like last week when Styles wanted to take Kevin Owens’s spot, sending Rollins into a rant about how he’s running out of options. Styles isn’t cool with everything going on with Rollins right now so here are Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville to interrupt. Pearce says Rollins is getting one more chance at Wrestlemania, because if he can beat Styles tonight, he can face Edge instead. Styles clears Rollins out in a hurry.

Carmella is on her phone again when Queen Zelina interrupts. Zelina doesn’t think Carmella is taking their Wrestlemania title defense seriously but Carmella blows her off. Instead Zelina throws the phone away and tells her to get her head in this. That’s good for a slap and the brawl is on.

AJ Styles yells at Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville about their decision but promises to win anyway.

Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Shayna Baszler/Natalya

Ripley takes Baszler down to start and it’s off to Morgan, who gets pulled into the wrong corner. Natalya comes in and drops Morgan down, allowing Shayna to crank on the arm. Cue Carmella to cry to Corey Graves about what happened to her as Morgan fights out of the corner. Baszler pulls Ripley off the apron though, leaving Natalya to hit Morgan with the discus lariat. The Hart Attack gives Baszler the pin at 3:48.

Rating: C. This is where the title match at Wrestlemania is going to fall apart (because it means so much in the first place): since there are so few teams in the division, they are going to have to face each other and knock one another down, leaving no one worth anything once we get to Wrestlemania, where Zelina and Carmella likely retain anyway.

Post match Carmella beats up Baszler and Natalya before posing with Queen Zelina, who approves so hugging can ensue.

We look at Becky Lynch injuring Bianca Belair last week.

Here is Becky for a chat. She sits in a chair and asks what it profits a man to gain the world but to lose his soul. Becky went fifteen months without the Raw Women’s Title and it is worth it to give given up her soul to get the title back. This week she was going to go after Belair’s hair but Belair is injured too. It’s a throat for a throat and Becky would sell out over and over again if it meant keeping her title. At Wrestlemania, she’ll show Belair what profits she has gained. This felt like an explanation for a heel turn that took place seven months ago.

We recap Pat McAfee vs. Austin Theory.

Theory is ready for the dumb jock McAfee and he wants to make Vince McMahon proud..

Veer Mahaan is coming on April 4.

Aust….WAIT WHAT??? THEY SET A DATE??? Somebody get my medicine.

Austin Theory vs. Finn Balor

Non-title and here is Pat McAfee to join commentary. An early rollup gives Balor two and he’s back with a basement dropkick. Theory gets kicked out to the floor, where McAfee mocks him with some weird dancing. The distraction lets Balor hit a shotgun dropkick against the barricade and we take a break.

Back with McAfee cheerleading Balor to his feet for the comeback, only to have Theory knock him outside. Balor sends him into the announcers’ table over and over, setting up the shotgun dropkick into the corner. The Coup de Grace misses though and Theory takes Balor down, drawing McAfee up to the apron. The ATL is broken up but Theory is right back with a brainbuster onto the knee for two. Another McAfee distraction cuts Theory off though and the small package gives Balor the pin at 7:58.

Rating: C. This was all about McAfee vs. Theory as the US Champion was left out there in a feud that has nothing to do with him. I’m still not sure why this is McAfee vs. Theory instead of Theory going after the Intercontinental Title, as Ricochet has nothing going on and it isn’t like McAfee is being brought in especially for this show. The match was good enough while it wasn’t focused on the announcer, but that was the case most of the time.

We look at the Raw Tag Team Title situation, which is leading to RKBro defending against Alpha Academy and the Street Profits in a triple threat at Wrestlemania.

RKBro vs. Alpha Academy

Non-title. Before the match Chad Gable promises that the Academy is winning the titles at Wrestlemania. Gable cranks on Orton’s arm to start but Orton brings him into the corner. The assisted Floating Bro gives Riddle two but Gable sends him into the wall that is Otis. Riddle fights back with some running forearms, only to be knocked outside for the running Otis clothesline as we take a break. Back with Riddle making the hot tag to Orton (big reaction for that) and house is cleaned. The hanging DDT hits Gable for two as Otis makes the save. Riddle comes back in and jumps Gable, setting up the Bro Derek for the pin at 7:49.

Rating: C+. RKBro continues to be the most popular act on Raw and they continue to put on some of the most consistent matches on the show as well. It makes sense to keep them together this long and I’m not sure where they go from here. For the first time in forever, I want to see a team stay together and it is going to be a big deal when they finally split up, because they have gelled that well.

Post match the Street Profits run in and take out both teams.

Dana Brooke was attacked by Akira Tozawa earlier this week but manages to escape with the title again, as Tozawa continues to screw things up.

Dana Brooke/Reggie vs. Akira Tozawa/Tamina

Non-title. Earlier today, Tamina choked Tozawa and demanded to get the 24/7 Title. We start with a game of chicken but Tozawa can’t hold Tamina up. Instead he gets on her shoulders and locks up with Dana until Tamina kicks Reggie in the ribs. Tamina and Tozawa are sent into the corner, where Tamina falls face first into a low blow on Tozawa. The running flipping seated senton gives Reggie the pin at 1:04. This is a thing that continues to be on Raw every week.

We recap the opening segment.

AJ Styles vs. Seth Rollins

The winner gets Edge at Wrestlemania. Styles grabs a headlock to start but gets knocked down by a running shoulder. A Pedigree attempt is countered though and AJ sends him over the top and out to the floor. The slingshot forearm takes Rollins down again and we take a break. Back with Styles fighting out of a cravate but missing a charge into the post. That’s good for a nine count on the floor so Rollins chops away in the corner back inside. A running dropkick in the Tree of Woe (that was nasty) gives Rollins two but AJ fights back again.

Rollins breaks up a springboard though and AJ goes crashing back to the floor. Rollins’ suicide dive connects and we take another break. Back again with Rollins letting go of a cravate and screaming about how he needs this to Styles. The slugout goes to Styles, including the running forearm in the corner. The fireman’s carry backbreaker gives AJ two and a belly to back faceplant gets the same.

Styles can’t hit the Styles Clash as Rollins escapes and grabs a Falcon Arrow for two of his own. We hit the pinfall reversal sequence until AJ suplexes him into the corner. AJ takes him up top but Rollins slips off and bangs up his leg, allowing Styles to grab a torture rack swing into a powerbomb for two more. The Phenomenal Forearm is superkicked out of the air though and Rollins hits the Buckle Bomb. AJ slips out to the apron and loads up the Phenomenal Forearm but Edge comes in with a chair to Styles for the DQ at 22:44.

Rating: B. Again, what would you expect from two guys of this caliber getting this much time in a featured match? That is the kind of thing that you do not see very often and it is special when it does, as both of them got to look good. I don’t think there was much doubt about the result, but the match being rather good makes up for that.

Post match Rollins snaps and says the show doesn’t happen next week unless he gets what he wants. Things are broken at ringside to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. What mattered here was it felt like the show was taking things seriously (24/7 Title stuff aside) and the talking segments worked better than in recent weeks. They helped advance some things towards Wrestlemania, with Owens’ segment working out well. I’m not sure how we get to what should be the pretty obvious end game for Rollins but they put it in the prime spot this week and it felt bigger as a result. I liked this show, though it felt like a fluke rather than a change of pace.

Results
Mysterios b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode – Frog splash to Roode
Omos b. Apollo Crews/Commander Azeez – Double pin
Natalya/Shayna Baszler b. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley – Hart Attack to Morgan
Finn Balor b. Austin Theory – Small package
RKBro b. Alpha Academy – Bro Derek to Gable
Dana Brooke/Reggie b. Tamina/Akira Tozawa – Running flipping seated senton to Tozawa
AJ Styles b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Edge interfered

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 28, 2022
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Jimmy Smith Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We are just over a month away from Wrestlemania and it would be nice to have the show actually get some more matches announced. There are only a handful of things set for the card and WWE is running out of shows to build them up. Maybe they can put some of them together tonight, as they kind of need to. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence. Since when does this show have an opening sequence?

Here is Kevin Owens, in a sideways cowboy hat, to open with the Kevin Owens Show. He brings out his best friend and his tag team partner, Seth Rollins, to talk about how they’re going to win the Raw Tag Team Titles next week. Owens talks about how he can’t stand Texas but they have to find a way to get to Wrestlemania. Therefore they are going to win the titles next week and defend them at Wrestlemania, which will take place in that stupid Texas.

Owens stomps on the hat but for now, we need to bring out this week’s guests: the Raw Tag Team Champions, Alpha Academy. After assuring them that Otis’ chair is reinforced, Owens and Rollins promise to take the titles next week. Gable brags about his education and, after complaining about how they only have a 33.3% change of retaining the titles, starts shooshing both of them (just like their new SHOOOSH shirts suggest). This sets up a SHOOSH off between Gable and Owens until a Stunner leaves Gable laying and we take a break.

Seth Rollins/Kevin Owens vs. Alpha Academy

Non-title with Gable still down and we’re joined in progress with Otis elbowing Owens in the face. Gable gets on the apron as Rollins comes in to take Otis into the corner, only to be sent to the apron. A Gable distraction lets Otis knock Rollins off the apron and some whip send Rollins into the barricade.

Back in and Otis hits a suplex to drop Rollins but a missed shot allows the tag back to Owens. Everything breaks down and Owens hits a splash off the apron on Rollins, only to get run over by Otis as we take a break. We come back with Gable working on Owens’ knee before rolling some German suplexes. An enziguri rocks Gable though and it’s Rollins coming back in to pick up the pace.

A Sling Blade hits Gable and a Downward Spiral into the middle buckle makes it worse. There’s the Falcon Arrow for two more and Rollins nods after the kickout. It’s back to Owens for the fisherman’s buster onto the knee but Otis breaks it up. Otis’ Vader Bomb sets up a moonsault from Gable with Rollins making the save. Rollins dives onto Otis to take him out and dives back in for a pop up Buckle Bomb. A Stunner sets up a Stomp to give Rollins the pin on Gable at 12:41.

Rating: C+. This picked way up near the end and is a great way to give Owens and Rollins some momentum going into next week’s title match. I’m not sure I can imagine the titles changing hands as Owens would seem to have bigger plans so they can get the title match out of the way and move on. For now though, this was a good way to set things up, as I’m having trouble getting annoyed at champions losing anymore.

Video on Omos.

Omos says he has dominated everyone since he debuted last year at Wrestlemania and he’ll do it again here.

Omos vs. T-Bar

Omos jumps him before the bell and knocks him off the apron for a crash. T-Bar is mostly out of it so Omos throws him into the corner, where T-Bar says he can go. Omos misses a charge into the corner but is fine enough to knock T-bar sillier with a clothesline. The chokebomb finishes T-Bar at 42 seconds.

We look back at Becky Lynch and Bianca Belair yelling at each other last week, setting up Belair beating Doudrop.

Nikki Ash and Doudrop are ready to be the hero/villain in their six woman tag this week. Becky Lynch comes in to say she’s ready to win, like she did over Belair at Summerslam in 26 seconds.

Rhea Ripley/Liv Morgan/Bianca Belair have an unnatural conversation in the back about strategy for their six woman tag.

Bianca Belair/Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Doudrop/Becky Lynch/Nikki Ash

Becky and Liv start but since Belair comes in, Becky hands it off to Nikki. That means it’s back to Liv, who actually locks up with Nikki and takes her down with a running hurricanrana. Everything breaks down early and the villains are sent to the floor as we take a break. Back with Becky rolling Belair up for two and sending her to the apron for a springboard kick to the face.

Becky uses the hair to pull Belair into the post and then ties it around the top rope. With that untied, Doudrop comes in to drop an elbow but Nikki misses a shot, allowing the hot tag back to Rhea. Becky gets faceplanted for two with Doudrop hitting a splash for the save. Everything breaks down and Nikki drags the crushed Becky back to the corner for the tag. Belair comes in as well as everything breaks down, with Liv hitting a dive to the floor.

Nikki high crossbodies Rhea but Belair is back in with a spinebuster. Becky grabs the braid to break that up but Belair WHIPS THE FIRE OUT OF HER with the braid, complete with some crazy cracking sounds (which are probably sound effects but dang those whips looked painful). Becky runs off while holding her ribs, leaving Belair to KOD Nikki for the pin at 12:11.

Rating: C+. This was a bit better than I expected and that is where things get more interesting. The interviews before the match were horrible and made me wonder how in the world they could screw these people up. No one talks like that and it made me want to turn off the show. Then you get to the match, where the women get to showcase their talent and the match is that much better. It’s amazing to see just how much of a gap there is between the in and out of the ring portions because the talent is absolutely there.

We look at Robert Roode costing Tommaso Ciampa the #1 contendership to the NXT Title.

Tommaso Ciampa vs. Robert Roode

Dolph Ziggler is here with Roode. Ciampa’s No One Will Survive theme has been replaced with a generic rock song, which shouldn’t be that surprising. Ciampa starts fast but misses a running knee to Roode, who counters the Fairy Tale Ending and rolls him up for two. Another running knee connects to knock Ziggler off the apron and a rollup finishes Roode at 2:40.

Post match Roode and Ziggler beat Ciampa down, with Ziggler promising to take out Ciampa and Bron Breakker tomorrow on NXT.

We look at Dana Brooke losing and regaining the 24/7 Title.

Dana Brooke/Reggie vs. Akira Tozawa/Tamina

The women start with Tamina being sent into the corner for the handspring elbow. Reggie comes in to roll Tozawa up for two and a dropkick gets the same with Tamina making the save. Everything breaks down and Reggie’s running flipping seated senton finishes Tozawa at 1:44.

Post match Brooke kisses Reggie to the mat and Reggie seems pleased. Tozawa puckers up for Tamina, who kisses him as well. Tozawa looks like he is in a trance.

The Street Profits are ready to take out RKBro tonight. They throw in some mocking of the rest of the tag division for a bonus.

Mysterios vs. Hurt Business

Before the match, the Mysterios promise to take out Miz and Logan Paul at Wrestlemania but tonight they’re focused on the Hurt Business. Cue the Miz to list off his WWE accomplishments before bragging about how great Logan Paul really is. They’re big global stars and they are AWESOME, certainly better than the Mysterios.

We take a break and come back joined in progress with Benjamin sending Rey tot he apron for a Downward Spiral from Alexander. Back in and Rey fights out of the corner before hurricanranaing Alexander into the same corner. The diving tag brings in Dominik, who comes in off the top with a high crossbody to Shelton. A suplex drops Dominik but he’s back with a tornado DDT, bringing Alexander back in for the save. Dominik sends Shelton outside but his suicide dive is countered. That earns Benjamin a posting but Miz pops up to grab Dominik. Rey chases Miz off, leaving Dominik to get rolled up for the pin at 4:30.

Rating: C-. They have got to find something new for Dominik because this stuff is just so dull. He is completely fine in the ring but he is about as interesting as watching a sidewalk dry. Miz’s interference was a fine way to go, but come up with something better for Dominik, which means getting him out of this team as soon as possible.

Riddle is coloring to stay focused when Randy Orton comes in to say they’re going to go win tonight. Then next week, they’re getting their Tag Team Titles back.

Carmella and Queen Zelina are in the back, with Carmella saying she and Corey Graves are going to put on a show after she and Zelina retain the Women’s Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania.

RKBro vs. Street Profits

Riddle pulls Ford into an early triangle choke, which is enough to set up the Orton circle stomp, much to the fans’ approval. Dawkins comes in and is sent outside for a springboard Floating Bro from Riddle, who is taken down by Ford’s big flip dive as we take a break. Back with Riddle fighting out of trouble and bringing Orton back in for the hanging DDT to Ford.

Everything breaks down and Dawkins knocks Riddle to the floor, leaving Orton to have the RKO blocked. Ford enziguris Orton and hits the frog splash…..for the pin at 6:40, as Orton seemed like he couldn’t get the foot on the ropes. That really didn’t seem to be the planned finish, which was either Orton being out of position or hurt, as the referee and Riddle immediately checked on him and then talked to the Profits.

Rating: C. That ending did not look good as the splash looked to mess Orton up badly. I can’t imagine that was the planned finish as RKBro has a title match coming up next week and then gets beaten here in what should have been a tuneup. Hopefully Orton is ok, because he looked very out of it after the match.

Veer Mahaan is still coming.

Smackdown Breakdown.

Austin Theory is in Vince McMahon’s office and talks about Vince’s appearance on the Pat McAfee Show. Theory lists off McAfee’s accomplishments, which don’t seem to impress Vince. It will be Vince’s first sitdown interview in twenty years, but Theory thinks McAfee might jump him. Vince says it’s not that kind of a show and leaves. Theory picks up Vince’s pencil and says it could be.

US Title: Finn Balor vs. Damian Priest

Balor is challenging and we have had two breaks, the Smackdown Breakdown and the Vince/Theory segment since his entrance. Priest elbows Balor in the face to start and grabs a reverse chinlock. We hit the chinlock to keep Balor down for a bit, only to have him fight up and send Priest outside. The big flip dive drops Priest and we take a break.

Back with Balor scoring with the Pele to put Priest on his knee, setting up the double stomp. The shotgun dropkick sets up a missed Coup de Grace, allowing Priest to clothesline him down. Priest’s spinning kick to the head sets up the South of Heaven chokeslam for two. The Reckoning is loaded up but Balor slips out and this another shotgun dropkick. Now the Coup de Grace can connect for the pin and the title at 10:36.

Rating: C+. I can live with this one as Balor has needed something to do for a long time now. At the same time, Priest has gotten a good bit out of the title, though he has sputtered a bit in recent months. It was time for the change, though I’m almost scared to see what is next for Priest now that he has lost the title.

Post match Priest says the people carried Balor to winning the US Title. They never gave him that reaction during his title reign, so Priest is going to win that title back and all that motivation isn’t going to mean a thing. Priest clothesline him down and hits a Razor’s Edge onto (not through) the announcers’ table. There’s your heel turn, on a roster with a lot of heels.

We look back at Edge’s Wrestlemania challenge.

Here is Edge to get an answer to his challenge. Edge wants someone to come out and accept so here is….AJ Styles, much to Edge’s delight. Styles gets in the ring and says he accepts, with Edge talking about how both of them have wanted this match for a long time. Edge wants the bulldog AJ and not the one who has been Omos’ tag team b**** for the last few years.

Styles doesn’t like that and the fight is on, with the Phenomenal Forearm missing. Instead Edge kicks him low and gives that heel face of his. Edge hammers away and goes to leave but stops and comes back. The Conchairto crushes AJ’s head and Edge looks like he’s about to cry…before hitting another one to end the show. Yeah the Conchairto is a cliché, but this feels like a Wrestlemania match and that is a nice thing to see.

Overall Rating: C. The last hour saved this show as stuff actually happened for a change. As tends to be the case, the biggest problem around here is the long stretch where very little interesting happens and it feels like WWE is throwing stuff out there to fill in parts of the three hours.

There is some interesting/quality stuff here, such as the title change and Edge’s heel turn, but there is such a dry spell in the middle that the good parts (also including the opener and the six woman tag) are drowned out so badly. The last forty five or so minutes were a boost and I’m almost scared to think about how bad it would be without them. Oh and we are now back to the “how does X have a path to Wrestlemania” stuff, which is just as stupid now as it has been every other single time.

Results
Kevin Owens/Seth Rollins b. Alpha Academy – Stomp to Gable
Omos b. T-Bar – Chokebomb
Bianca Belair/Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley b. Nikki Ash/Becky Lynch/Doudrop – KOD to Ash
Tommaso Ciampa b. Robert Roode – Rollup
Dana Brooke/Reggie b. Tamina/Akira Tozawa – Running flipping seated senton to Tozawa
Hurt Business b. Mysterios – Rollup to Dominik
Street Profits b. RKBro – Frog splash to Orton
Finn Balor b. Damian Priest – Coup de Grace

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Elimination Chamber 2022
Date: February 19, 2022
Location: Jeddah Super Dome, Jeddah, Saudi Arabia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re back on the other side of the world this time and the card is pretty stacked. There are two Elimination Chamber matches to go with three women’s matches as we get ready for Wrestlemania. That could go in more than one direction and the show seems a bit more interesting as a result. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Miz vs. Rey Mysterio

Dominik Mysterio is here with Rey. Miz knocks him down to start and hits the early posing on the ropes. Back up and Rey headscissors him into 619 position but Miz isn’t quite ready for that. Instead Rey knocks him to the floor for the sliding splash, setting off a 619 chant. Dominik sends Miz back inside (twerp) but he breaks up something from Rey on the top. They head outside again with Miz sending him into the barricade, setting up the running kick to the face back inside.

The chinlock sets up the YES Kicks but, as usual, the big one misses. Another headscissors sends Miz into the post and there’s the top rope seated senton to drop him again. Miz is back with a DDT for two but the Skull Crushing Finale is broken up. The 619 connects so Miz has to roll outside before the top rope splash can launch.

Miz grabs a chair, earning himself a dive from Rey. Dominik grabs the chair and takes it away, so Miz fakes being shoved into the steps. That’s enough for an ejection of Dominik, but Rey counters the 619 into a cradle for the pin at 9:15, proving that Dominik is in fact worthless and a detriment.

Rating: C+. These two work well together and putting Rey out there is a good way to open any show. The fans are going to respond to him and the high flying/fast paced stuff is still more than entertaining enough to watch. Odds are this sets up Dominik beating Miz as well, because Dominik will be a thing whether you like him or not.

Post match Miz goes after Rey, which draws Dominik back in for the save. A double 619 sets up back to back frog splashes to leave Miz laying.

The opening video looks at how the Elimination Chamber is here, which sets us on the Road to WrestleMania. The rest of the matches get a look as well.

We recap Goldberg vs. Roman Reigns for Reigns’ Universal Title. Reigns is on the way to Wrestlemania and Brock Lesnar but he has to stop for a match against Goldberg, who just said he was getting a title match.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Goldberg

Reigns, with the rest of the Bloodline, is defending. They stare at each other for a good while and the GOLDBERG chants are on. The big power lockup goes to Goldberg but Reigns starts punching him in the face. Goldberg is sent outside but he sends Reigns into the barricade for a breather. Back in and the spear cuts Reigns down but the Jackhammer is countered into a release Rock Bottom. The Superman Punch drops Goldberg again but Reigns’ spear is countered by Goldberg’s spear. The Jackhammer doesn’t work though as Reigns reverses into the guillotine and Goldberg is out at 5:59.

Rating: C. Happy days are here again as they can’t threaten us with this stupid match anymore. It wasn’t exactly good but it was short, which is the most important aspect of any Goldberg match. I know it would have been insane to change the title here, but it isn’t like they haven’t done something nutty with Goldberg before. This could have been far worse, which is about the benchmark for most Goldberg matches these days.

Video on the Elimination Chamber.

Rhea Ripley vs. Doudrop vs. Bianca Belair vs. Liv Morgan vs. Nikki Ash vs. Alexa Bliss

For the Raw Women’s Title shot at Wrestlemania. Nikki and Liv start, leaving Alexa in her pod, complete with swing (because of course). Liv gets sent into the cage, the Plexiglas and the cage floor until Doudrop is in after about two minutes. Doudrop comes in at #3 and drives Nikki into the cage over and over before cutting off Liv for trying to break it up. A missed charge sends Doudrop into the post though and Nikki is left alone in the ring as Rhea Ripley is in at #4.

The stalking is on but Ripley has to superkick Doudrop. Ripley sends Nikki into the cage and climbs the cage to pose a bit, setting up Riptide to get rid of Nikki at 6:18. Alexa Bliss is in at #5 and gets to clean house, including Insult To Injury for two on Morgan. Back up and Morgan knocks Bliss down and goes up but Doudrop shoves her off the ropes (with Morgan’s leg getting caught) for a crash. Ripley offers a distraction though and Morgan hits a sunset bomb to get rid of Doudrop at 8:51.

Bianca Belair is in at #6 to complete the field as Morgan might have hurt her knee when she got caught on the ropes. Belair hits a scary one armed gorilla press on Morgan and a handspring moonsault hits Bliss. We get the Ripley vs. Belair showdown but they stop to suplex Bliss and Belair instead (with Bliss’ dress falling onto Ripley’s face while she’s upside down). The staredown is on again and they trade some hard slaps to the face. The KOD is broken up but Morgan hits a double Codebreaker.

Bliss is back up with what looked like a running Blockbuster to Morgan, setting up Twisted Bliss for the elimination at 12:08. Bliss hits Ripley with a DDT and the KOD gives Belair the pin at 12:41, leaving us with Bliss vs. Belair. A Code Red gives Bliss two but Belair powers her down. The 450 misses but Bliss can’t hit her DDT. Instead Belair powers her up for a suplex, which is broken up as well. Another DDT is blocked so Bliss rolls her up for two. Belair has had it though and hits the KOD for the pin and the title shot at 15:35.

Rating: C+. The time was all over the place here and I believe this is the shortest Elimination Chamber match ever. The good thing is that they didn’t go nuts by having Bliss win in her return to push her straight to Wrestlemania. As much as I wanted Ripley to win, Belair has unfinished business with Becky Lynch so that is probably the right way to go.

Video on Bobby Lashley.

WWE met with some Special Olympians this weekend.

Naomi/Ronda Rousey vs. Sonya Deville/Charlotte

Deville has a bad arm coming in and as a result, Rousey has to have an arm tied behind her back. Rousey comes to the ring in her judo gear for a different look. We get a video on Rousey before we’re ready to go. Deville and Rousey start things off and believe it or not, Deville’s arm is suddenly fine. Charlotte offers a distraction so Deville can jump Rousey in the corner.

A kick to the head rocks Deville though and a knee to the head does it again. Rousey wants Charlotte, who is fine enough to come in, only to tag right back out. Naomi comes in to jump Sonya but gets sent hard into the corner. A clothesline is avoided with a slide though and it’s back to Rousey, who tries the armbar on Sonya. That’s broken up with a kick to the face though and Charlotte gets to chop away in the corner.

The double teaming continues, with Charlotte kicking Naomi off the apron. A hammerlock goes onto Ronda’s good arm but she manages to knock Charlotte down and bring Naomi back in. The springboard kick to the face rocks Charlotte but Rousey is knocked outside. Back up and the hot tag brings in Rousey, setting up Piper’s Pit to Deville. Charlotte is fine enough to look on as Deville taps to the armbar at 9:12.

Rating: C. It went a bit longer than it needed to but they did what they needed to do. There was no reason to have Charlotte and Rousey do anything important here and they didn’t waste time. Rousey gets to look like a force and Deville will be fine after a quick promo where she abuses her power again. It might not have been great, but it did its job.

We recap Madcap Moss vs. Drew McIntyre. Moss and Happy Corbin injured McIntyre’s neck and put him out for about a month so it’s time for revenge in a Falls Count Anywhere match.

Drew McIntyre vs. Madcap Moss

Falls Count Anywhere and Happy Corbin is here with Moss. Corbin helps jump McIntyre to start and the fight heads outside. Another shot from Corbin wakes McIntyre up so the chase is on, with Corbin bailing to the back. Moss tries to jump the distracted McIntyre but he gets kicked in the face instead. Corbin runs back out to keep Moss from being thrown off the stage and it’s a double suplex to drop McIntyre.

Back in and McIntyre fights back, setting up the reverse Alabama Slam, with Moss landing HARD on top of his head in a terrifying crash. Corbin offers a distraction but Moss charges into a belly to belly on the floor. McIntyre tells commentary to move so he can suplex Moss over the announcers’ table. Corbin is back up to send McIntyre through the barricade for two but McIntyre is fine enough to hit a superplex for his own near fall back inside. The Futureshock sets up the Claymore (with McIntyre holding Angela the sword) for the pin at 9:11.

Rating: C-. What else were you expecting here? McIntyre wasn’t going to break a hard sweat against Moss and this was little more than an extended workout. I’m sure we’ll get McIntyre vs. Corbin at Wrestlemania and it won’t be much better because it’s just finishing this story off. I know WWE thinks it’s a big enough deal but who could possibly be interested in this show?

We recap the Kickoff Show match with Rey Mysterio beating Miz, followed by Dominik beating up Miz for a bonus.

Miz is furious and promises to get a partner to help deal with the Mysterios. He is off for a phone call.

WWE Superstars had fun in Jeddah, because it’s different here.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Lita

Lita is challenging and shoulders Becky down to start, earning a YOU STILL GOT IT chant. The Twist of Fame is broken up and Becky snaps the back of Lita’s neck across the top. The stomping is on before Becky kicks away at the ribs. Becky’s middle rope Fameasser brings Lita out of the ropes for two and the Bexploder gets the same. Another Bexploder is countered into a DDT for two and the comeback is on. Lita hits a middle rope crossbody for two and they go to a pinfall reversal sequence.

Lynch gets caught grabbing the rope so Lita pulls her into a sleeper, which Lynch needs the rope to escape. A powerbomb out of the corner gives Lita two and she busts out a Trish Stratus Stratusfaction. A snapmare driver gives Lita two but Becky is back with the Disarm-Her. That’s blocked as well, so Becky hits the Manhandle Slam for two, with Lita getting a food on the rope. Lynch misses a moonsault so Lita hits a Twist of Fate into the Litasault for her own near fall. Back up and Lynch hits a quick Manhandle Slam to retain at 12:14.

Rating: C+. Considering Lita has barely wrestled in years, this was a pretty entertaining match. Lynch wasn’t about to drop the title but they gave Lita a lot here, as they should have. I do like bringing in these legends to face the champions on occasion, as it is a good way to bridge the gap between the major title defenses. Sometimes it’s ok to have a quick story without the drama and that is what they did here.

Post match Becky leaves and Lita gets a bit of a sendoff.

Undertaker is in the Hall of Fame and we get the same long form video from this week’s Smackdown.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Viking Raiders

The Usos are defending…..at some point in the future as they jump the Raiders on the floor and lay them out. No match.

Video on Seth Rollins.

We recap the men’s Elimination Chamber for the WWE Title. Bobby Lashley beat Brock Lesnar to take the title at the Royal Rumble so Lesnar wanted a rematch. This is as good as he can get, which seems to suit him just fine.

WWE Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Brock Lesnar vs. Riddle vs. Seth Rollins vs. Austin Theory vs. AJ Styles

Lashley is defending and it’s Seth Rollins starting with Austin Theory. During Lesnar’s entrance, Cole used the line “playing with the house’s money” for the third time tonight. Rollins hits a Sling Blade to start but Theory is back with a release fisherman’s suplex. Some superkicks put Theory down and it’s a Buckle Bomb into Lashley’s pod to leave Lashley and Riddle laying.

Riddle is in at #3 and beats on Riddle as Lashley is helped out of the Chamber. Rollins catches Riddle on top for a reverse superplex and there’s a frog splash to give Rollins two. AJ Styles is in at #4 and powerbombs Rollins down for a fast two. A double superplex is loaded up but Theory makes the save and powerbombs Rollins and Styles down. It’s supposed to be Lashley in next but since he isn’t here, Lesnar kicks his pod open and starts wrecking people. The F5 finishes Rollins at 9:48 and another F5 finishes Riddle at 10:13.

At the same time, we are told that Lashley will not be back, meaning that there will be a new champion tonight. Another F5 gets rid of Styles at 10:57 and it’s Lesnar vs. Theory for the title. Theory tries to hide in a pod but Lesnar breaks it open and suplexes Theory onto the cage. Theory gets in a low blow and a rolling dropkick, setting up a DDT for two.

Lesnar glares at him so Theory climbs the Chamber and manages to get halfway out of the top before Lesnar pulls him back down. Lesnar slams him head first into the Plexiglas on top of the pod and then F5s him down onto the Chamber floor. That’s enough for Lesnar to win the title at 14:52.

Rating: C. It was short and to the point, which believe it or not was Lesnar gets another World Title, because he hasn’t had one in all of a few weeks now. I’m curious to see how Lashley is tied into the whole thing as he has a case to get another title shot, though it wouldn’t surprise me to see it ignored so we can do Reigns vs. Lesnar. Again. For both titles. Since no one else in WWE matters. Again.

Lesnar poses for a long time to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. It was better than most of the Saudi shows but it was about as ho hum of a card as you could have had. There were some good enough matches, but the focus was on setting up Brock Lesnar, Becky Lynch, Roman Reigns and Charlotte for Wrestlemania as WWE continues to rely on the same people over and over. There wasn’t a bad match on the show, though the booking continues to not exactly be the most exciting thing in the world. I’ll take it over the Crown Jewel and Super Showdown shows though so at least it’s a step up.

Results
Roman Reigns b. Goldberg – Guillotine choke
Bianca Belair won the women’s Elimination Chamber match last eliminating Alexa Bliss
Ronda Rousey/Naomi b. Sonya Deville/Charlotte – Armbar to Deville
Drew McIntyre b. Madcap Moss – Claymore
Becky Lynch b. Lita – Manhandle Slam
Brock Lesnar won the men’s Elimination Chamber last eliminating Austin Theory

 

 

 

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It’s time to head back halfway around the world as WWE is returning to Saudi Arabia. This time is a little different though, as the show will feature the Elimination Chamber rather than some generically titles event. The card could look a lot worse as there are three women’s matches and two Elimination Chamber matches, including one match where those two categories cross over. Let’s get to it.

Miz vs. Rey Mysterio

We’ll start with the match voted Most Likely To Be Demoted To The Kickoff Show as these two are fighting over Miz’s treatment of Dominik Mysterio. Yeah that’s a pretty lame reason to have the match but that has never stopped WWE from setting something up. This feels like a feud that has some legs to it and hopefully that could be a good thing, though it kind of hinges on the first match.

I’ll take Miz to win here, as it should give you a reason to get to Miz vs. Dominik. That might not be the most interesting match but it is something that we have to do at some point. WWE seems intent on getting Dominik over and that means they need to do something like have Miz beat Dominik’s dad to set it up. Miz goes over here, as it means someone needs to take him out later.

Madcap Moss vs. Drew McIntyre

This is the continuation of this feud for reasons that I don’t want to know, but odds are it leads to a showdown with Happy Corbin at WrestleMania. I have no idea how that is the best thing WWE can come up with for McIntyre, but what else could it be setting up? This is Falls Count Anywhere as a way for McIntyre to have some more fun, but I don’t know if that changes the result.

I’m going to go with what makes sense here and say McIntyre wins here, though I’m almost scared of the idea of Corbin cheating to help Moss win. McIntyre should be ready for something huge after WrestleMania but we have to get through Corbin and Moss first. That right there kind of sums up one of WWE’s biggest issues: there might be something good down the line, but you have to get through WWE’s lame idea first.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns(c) vs. Goldberg

You know what’s annoying about this match? I mean in addition to the fact that it is happening? WWE just might be crazy enough to put the title on Goldberg for some sort of conquering hero deal, as they have been nuttier than that before. As much as I’d like to believe that reigns slays Goldberg here to FINALLY let them get this match out of their system, I can’t help but think there is a chance they do otherwise.

That being said, I’ll still take Reigns here, at least partially for the sake of my own sanity. There is no logical reason for Goldberg to take the title from Reigns and then drop it back a few weeks later, but stranger things have happened. For now though, I’ll go with Reigns to win here and set up his match with Brock Lesnar at WrestleMania, because that is just what everyone wanted from Reigns: back to back showdowns with Goldberg and Lesnar.

Women’s Elimination Chamber

These matches are almost always a mix of dumb luck and eliminating some of the least likely candidates. This time around, you can write off Liv Morgan, Nikki Ash and Doudrop, as they aren’t challenging for anything at WrestleMania. That leaves Rhea Ripley, Alexa Bliss and Bianca Belair as potential winners and that means we have three viable options for this one.

I think I’ll actually take Ripley, who would be a fresh and interesting match with Lynch (and who might actually have a chance since she isn’t facing Charlotte). Belair is also an option due to needing revenge after the Summerslam title change, but I think that ship might have already sailed. Bliss could be in there as well, but this return screams some kind of screwy finish involving that dumb doll. Ripley wins here, in what is likely my false hope pick of the show.

SmackDown Tag Team Titles: Usos(c) vs. Viking Raiders

This would be your tag defense of the month for the Usos as they face one of the only other regular and successful teams on SmackDown. They have even pulled out all the stops by having the teams trade singles wins on SmackDown. That should be more than enough to set this up (at least in the modern WWE style) so maybe we can get something out of the pure talent involved.

In what should be the least dramatic match of the night, I’ll take the Usos to retain here. There is no reason to suggest that the Vikings are going to be able to defeat the best team in WWE today (and one of the best ever) so I’m not sure what kind of suspense this one is going to have. The good thing is that the match itself should be good with the speed vs. the power, but there is almost no chance of a title change here.

Ronda Rousey/Naomi vs. Charlotte/Sonya Deville

There is nothing wrong with a match that combines two feuds into one and they have done a nice enough job of it here. The twist this time is that Rousey’s arm will be tied behind her back because she ran her mouth a few weeks ago about how easy it should be to beat Deville. That should be enough of a way to let Charlotte get in some cheap shots as she and Rousey head on to WrestleMania, which is the main point of this match.

I’ll go with Rousey/Naomi winning as Naomi pins Deville. You don’t want the champ or the challenger taking a fall and since Naomi has already gotten the better of Deville, there is no reason to go back and mess with things again. Naomi could use another win to keep up her momentum and Rousey/Charlotte can be on their own while Naomi gets another pin on Deville.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch(c) vs. Lita

I’m not sure if this is supposed to be some big time competitive match where Lita is seen as a real threat or a “wouldn’t it be cool if” come to life. Lynch has been the champion for the better part of ever and there are very few people that I buy as having a chance to take the title. Lita isn’t exactly one of those people, but the cool thing is that she should be able to have some kind of a great match under any circumstances.

In case it isn’t that clear of a choice, I’m going with Lynch to retain before she finally drops the title in a pretty big match at WrestleMania. This is probably it for Lita (for now) as she is usually best in small doses. The match should work out well due to both of the women being very good at what they do, but I can’t bring myself to believe that Lita is potentially winning the title here.

WWE Title: Men’s Elimination Chamber

This one has some higher stakes and that is a nice thing to see. It also has a few potential ways to go, as there are more than a few options here. Again, we’ll eliminate those with no chance first. Riddle, Austin Theory and AJ Styles (I think) have no chance so we’ll write them off already. That leaves us with the defending champion Bobby Lashley, Seth Rollins and Brock Lesnar, meaning you have at least two viable options and one kind of longshot.

I’m really not sure where to go here as I don’t want Lesnar getting the title back but I also don’t know if I can picture him losing. I’ll go with some sort of shenanigans leading to Lashley retaining, which could range from Roman Reigns interfering (perhaps after Lesnar did the same to him to make up for the Royal Rumble) to MVP cheating to a bunch of people going after Lesnar at once. I’m probably wrong, but I’d like to see Lashley get another good run with the title. That being said, I can’t shake the idea of Rollins winning either. We’ll go with Lashley just to pick one of the three.

Overall Thoughts

There is the potential for a good show on this card, despite there being more than a few matches without that much drama. Since WWE has decided this is the way their calendar works, this is going to be the last stop on the Road to WrestleMania, meaning that it is time to get things going as well as possible. I’m hoping this show can pull that off, but you never know with this company anymore. The Chambers should work, but as usual, it is all going to depend on which direction they take.

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 14, 2022
Location: Gainbridge Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Jimmy Smith Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Elimination Chamber and that means it’s time for a lot of talking about the matches that have already been made for Saturday’s show. It also means that we are in for another limited commercial show, because if there is one thing WWE needs, it is more content. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video now has a voiceover saying “FOREVER. TOGETHER.”

Here is Bobby Lashley with MVP to get things going. Lashley talks about having to go through the Elimination Chamber to get to WrestleMania as WWE Champion. The Chamber has shortened careers and impacted lives….but so has he. MVP says there is 16% chance of Lashley retaining the title, but when you add in the Almighty Quotient, it is about 100%.

Cue Seth Rollins to interrupt, saying that Lashley looks great, but not as great as he does. Rollins talks about how Lashley is champion right now but he knows someone who can take the title. MVP threatens Rollins with Lashley violence but here is Riddle, in a toga, to interrupt. Riddle thinks the Elimination Chamber is like last week’s quiz bowl (Rollins isn’t sure) because he remembers being locked in a gas station bathroom. When the security guard let him out, Riddle knew he could do anything. Imagine him as the WWE Champion to go with his Tag Team Titles when he and Randy Orton win them back soon.

Riddle invites the two of them to the toga party but here is Austin Theory to interrupt. Vince McMahon has taught him so many things that he can use on Saturday that he has to win. Cue AJ Styles to say he has to win because he needs a defining Wrestlemania moment. Maybe he could walk in as the US Champion (which he can become tonight) and WWE Champion! Riddle says that would be cool, but not as cool as AJ coming to the RKBroga party!

Lashley says he’s the only one who has won an Elimination Chamber and runs down everyone else’s chances. That includes Brock Lesnar, who comes out to interrupt, tips his cowboy hat, and takes his time getting into the ring. Brock takes off the jacket and hat, and puts them on Theory. Lesnar and Lashley go face to face so Theory jumps….well over Lesnar actually. Suplex City ensues as everyone else leaves. Lesnar gets his hat back and uses Theory’s phone for a quick selfie. To be fair, the hat really works for him. This was the latest revolving door segment and as usual, it only kind of succeeded.

The Street Profits run down tonight’s card.

Street Profits vs. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode

We see a clip of Dolph Ziggler coming to NXT and getting in a fight with Tommaso Ciampa. As a result, Ciampa is here on commentary. Ford dropkicks Ziggler at the bell so it’s off to Roode for a swinging Rock Bottom. Ziggler is back in for a shot to the face and his own two but Ford’s kick to the head allows the double (jumping) tags. Dawkins cleans house until Roode catches him with a powerslam for two. Hold on though as Ciampa needs to get up and applaud Ziggler. The threat of a superkick makes Ciampa throw water in Ziggler’s face, leaving Dawkins to Anoint Ziggler. Ford’s frog splash is good for the pin at 2:44.

Post match Ziggler superkicks Ciampa but bails from the Street Profits going after him.

We look back at RKBro winning the Quiz Bowl last week.

We go to the RKBroga party, where Riddle wants to know where Randy Orton is. Queen Zelina thinks it’s for her but Riddle starts a BROGA chant.

Randy Orton is in another locker room and seems to find this dumb. He also wants to be ready for his match against Seth Rollins, because Rollins is always planning things. This is Monday, so Rollins is going to take the RKO.

Rocky Johnson Black History Month video.

We look at Kevin Owens not being able to get into the Elimination Chamber, which hurts him even more because he can’t be WWE Champion in Texas.

According to a fan poll, Owens is LYING about his love of Texas.

Kevin Owens is sad that he can’t be in the Elimination Chamber, but at least that means he doesn’t have to be in the Elimination Chamber in Texas. He can’t stand Texas, just like he can’t stand Indianapolis. Owens is from the intelligent and sophisticated Canada.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Damian Priest

Priest is defending and takes Styles down by the arm to start. A quick slam gives Priest two and we hit a chinlock with a knee in Styles’ back. Styles fights up but the Styles Clash is countered into a flapjack. Something like a Dominator gives Priest two but Styles comes right back with a Pele kick. That’s enough to send them outside, where Priest spinwheel kicks Styles’ leg out in a clever knockdown. Back in and Styles kicks him in the face and loads up the Phenomenal Forearm, only to have Priest grab the ropes. That’s enough to let Priest grab a rollup for the pin to retain at 4:34.

Rating: C+. That was better and I was surprised by the result. Priest needed a win to put him back on the right path and a clean pin over Styles is a good way to get there. The good thing is that Styles can absorb a loss where he gets caught like that a good bit more than Priest, who had been on a pretty nasty run as of late. Now just let him be a monster again and we might be getting somewhere.

Post match, Styles nods at him in respect and shakes Priest’s hand.

We go back to Alexa Bliss’ therapy, where she is looking a bit more normal, with her hair down and in more regular clothing (though I’m not sure where it would be regular). The therapist says, aside from the incident in the grocery store, last week was good. It was so good, that she has earned a gift. What would she like it to be? Actually she would like the music to stop, but he has something else in mind: Lilly’s unstuffed body, and the stuffing to go with it! She gets a bit shaky but the therapist pulls out a backup, and still constructed, Lilly doll.

Omos vs. Cedric Alexander/Shelton Benjamin

Alexander tries to sneak up on Omos but gets claw shoved into the corner. Shelton comes in and gets beaten down as well, leaving Alexander to get chokeslammed for the pin at 1:34. Total dominance.

We look back at Dana Brooke turning down Reggie’s unspoken offer of romance.

Reggie and Dana Brooke are having a platonic Valentine’s Day dinner but Tamina and Akira Tozawa, in disguise, are here too.

It’s back to the RKBroga party, where Riddle gives Kevin Patrick a pep talk when the Street Profits show up. That means Angelo Dawkins gets to dominate at beer pong, earning himself some cheers.

Adam Pearce is in the ring for a contract signing between Becky Lynch and Lita. After Lita comes to the ring, Becky comes out looking depressed, with much less gaudy clothes than usual and sunglasses on, though she can barely look ahead. Becky sits down and says Lita doesn’t have to do this. She hasn’t slept all week as she can’t imagine doing this against her teenage idol.

Lita asks the fans if she should tear up the contract or sign it and shut Becky up. She isn’t back for one more match but one more run. That’s one more championship run, and the match is happening if Becky wants it to or not. Lita signs, which makes Becky say Lita is pushing her.

Becky gets more serious and says she will do everything to keep the title on her shoulder. Now Lynch signs, so Lita says that it is on her to finish it. The only thing that is ending on Sunday though is the 500 day title reign (not quite) when Lita wins the title. Becky puts her glasses back on and leaves all sad. This was kind of weird and didn’t exactly work, but at least they tried something different.

Video on the Elimination Chamber.

Gauntlet Match

The winner gets to enter the Elimination Chamber last with Rhea Ripley in at #1 and Nikki Ash is in at #2. We’re joined in progress with Nikki tying her in the ring skirt to hammer away before going with the armbar. Ripley fights up but gets taken right back down into a cravate, which doesn’t do much good. With that broken up, Rhea hits some clotheslines but the Riptide is countered as well. Ash goes up but her crossbody is countered into…something where Ripley drops her. Not that it matters as Riptide finishes Nikki at 4:17.

Liv Morgan is in at #3 (now in much brighter gear) and we hear her talk about how she has been in the Chamber again. She’ll survive again though, just like she always does. We take another break and come back with some rollups getting two each before Morgan hits a running elbow in the corner. The chinlock goes on but Rhea fights up, only to get caught in a hurricanrana faceplant. Back up and Ripley grabs the Prism Trap, sending Ripley away for the escape. A superkick sets up Riptide to get rid of Morgan at 14:04.

Doudrop is #4 and they start by shoving each other a bit. Ripley has to power her way out of a headlock and an exchange of shoulders doesn’t go anywhere. An exchange of headbutts sets up a belly to back suplex to drop Ripley and Doudrop splashes her for two. Ripley is back up and hits a dropkick to put Doudrop down but the standing clothes just wake Doudrop up. Riptide is blocked and Doudrop headbutts her, only to get kicked in the head. A pretty fast Riptide gets rid of Doudrop at 23:48 and Bianca Belair is in at #5.

Back with Ripley in trouble but Belair goes to the apron for her kiss it deal. After backflipping over Ripley, Belair hits a delayed vertical suplex (with some high steps) for two. The abdominal stretch goes on for a good while before Belair hits the handspring moonsault for two more. Belair knocks her outside but gets sent into the steps to put both of them down and we take another break.

Back again with Belair faceplanting her for two but Ripley is right back with a failed Riptide attempt. Belair puts her on top for a slugout with Belair getting the better of things. Another handspring moonsault only hits knees though and Ripley goes up top for a heck of a missile dropkick for two more. The Prism Trap goes on again but Belair rolls out and hits a spinebuster. The KOD finishes Ripley at 40:34…and I guess we’ll find out who is entering the Chamber last on Saturday because that’s it.

Rating: B-. This was a match that got a lot of time and that is a good thing, as sometimes a very long wrestling match is the best thing for a show. Ripley gets to look like a star and while I don’t imagine her having the best chance on Saturday, it was good to see her getting some significant ring time for a change. Belair winning is a perfectly fine way to go, though I was kind of expecting to see the sixth entrant return here. Anyway, good, long match here and that often helps.

Respect is shown post match.

Back at the RKBroga Party, Riddle plays the guitar and sings until the Alpha Academy jumps him from behind. Riddle is left laying, with Chad Gable saying the party is over, bro.

We go back to the restaurant, where R-Truth and company chase after Dana Brooke (with the referee getting some food samples), who hides with Reggie. Dana is rather happy but Reggie wants to take their friendship to the next level. She politely turns him down again, so Reggie rolls her up to win the title. After Reggie and then the regular selection of nitwits mock Brooke, the waiter asks if that will be cash or card. At least the story seems to have ended, for now.

Mysterios vs. Alpha Academy

Non-title. Hold on though, as Chad Gable has to insult the crowd by putting them on double secret probation, even if they are probably already on some kind of probation. Then you have these same people helping RKBro win the Academic Challenge, LIKE IT WAS FAIR! Why were we talking about Michelangelo the turtle instead of the painter? Then there is Dominik, who had to cheat to beat Miz last week. Cue Miz and Maryse for commentary and we take a break before the bell.

We come back joined in progress with Otis splashing Rey, setting up Gable’s suplex for two. Rey fights up without much trouble and hands it off to Dominik for some suplexes and the Eddie Guerrero dance. Gable cuts him off with a tiger suplex for two as Rey makes the save. The Academy is sent outside and we take a break.

Back again with Dominik diving over to make the hot tag to Rey, who headscissors Chad down. Otis has to make a save so Dominik breaks that up, leaving Gable to take a double 619. Rey dives onto Miz at ringside so Dominik goes up for a high crossbody, only to have Gable roll through and grab the tights for the pin at 10:34.

Rating: C. Not too shabby of a tag match here, but the stalling before the match felt like they were trying to fill in time rather than having anything to say. At the same time, the Mysterios continue to be a tale of two wrestlers, as Rey feels fun even in his late 40s and Dominik is just there. Find something new for him, because this isn’t exactly interesting.

Post match Miz throws Dominik outside and gives Rey the Skull Crushing Finale.

Back to Alexa Bliss’ therapy, where the therapist tells her she can go. Bliss even has the replica Lilly doll, which she knows isn’t the real thing. He tells her to always have it by her side and she can have a good life. Before she leaves, she tells Lilly she’s cured and then announces that she’s the final entrant in the Elimination Chamber.

Smackdown Breakdown.

Elimination Chamber rundown.

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

Of note: Rollins made his way to the ring, then there was a break, then there was Smackdown Breakdown and the Chamber rundown, or over six and a half minutes ago. We then take ANOTHER break after Orton’s entrance and ring the bell about ten minutes after Rollins made it to the ring in the first place.

We finally get going with Orton taking him into the corner and hammering away, only to get dropped face first onto the top turnbuckle. The Stomp misses though and Orton clotheslines him to the floor. Even commentary knows what’s coming and they are absolutely right as Rollins is dropped onto the announcers’ table. Back in and Orton’s hanging DDT is countered with a backdrop to the floor, setting up Rollins’ knee off the apron.

A suicide dive sends Orton over the announcers’ table and we take a break. Back again with Orton hitting the top rope superplex for a double knockdown. Orton is fine enough to hit the powerslam for two but Rollins is back with a low superkick for two of his own. The Stomp misses and Orton backdrops the Pedigree attempt to the apron. Now the hanging DDT can connect and the RKO connects….as Alpha Academy runs down. Riddle cuts them off but the distraction is enough for Rollins to hit the Stomp for the pin at 15:17.

Rating: C+. It’s a good match between two people who have wrestled each other so many times that they could probably do this in their sleep. The match was mainly about advancing the Tag Team Title feud and I’ll take that over either of them getting a clean pin. Nothing we haven’t seen before, but they know how to do this very well.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was a fine example of what is wrong with Raw most of the time: it doesn’t feel like they have enough material to fill in a three hour show. I’m not sure how many rosters could ever do that on a full time basis, but it’s even harder when the roster has been gutted like this one. They didn’t exactly make me want to see Elimination Chamber, but the show was already set coming into this week. Even after Saturday though, they really need to find something to fill in the time around here, because all the stalling isn’t doing them any favors.

Results
Street Profits b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode – Frog splash to Ziggler
Damian Priest b. AJ Styles – Rollup
Omos b. Shelton Benjamin/Cedric Alexander – Chokeslam to Alexander
Bianca Belair won a gauntlet match last eliminating Rhea Ripley
Alpha Academy b. Mysterio – Rollup with tights to Dominik
Seth Rollins b. Randy Orton – Stomp

 

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Ring Of Honor
Date: February 9, 2022

It’s a special theme episode this week as we look at the first inductees into the Ring Of Honor Hall of Fame: the Briscoes. When you think about it, there isn’t anyone else it should have been if you are just looking at accomplishments. There are all kinds of classic matches here and hopefully they open the vault a bit. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We open with a video on the Briscoes (seems appropriate), including a bunch of home videos. It moves on to some of their better moments and bigger feuds before welcoming them to the Hall of Fame.

From Night of Champions on March 22, 2003 in Philadelphia.

Tag Team Titles: AJ Styles/Amazing Red vs. Briscoes

Styles and Red (only the second champions in the titles’ history) are defending and the Briscoes (both teenagers here) are making their debut as a team. Jay and Red run the ropes to start before Mark comes in to try some suplexes. It’s too early for that so we’ll go with an exchange of rollups for a standoff instead. AJ comes in to ride Mark on the mat before snapping off a German suplex.

It’s back to Jay, who gets German suplexed as well, albeit with Red adding a superkick to make it worse. Back in and Mark hits a high collar suplex on Styles, setting up some running double chops/boots in the corner. We take a break and come back with AJ snapping off a backbreaker into a suplex for a breather. The tag brings in Red for a top rope elbow but Jay makes a blind tag for a missile dropkick.

Red is right back with Brain Damage (kind of a kneeling tombstone but Red falls backwards while driving Jay’s head into the mat, making it a bit unclear who got the worst of it). AJ comes back in with a brainbuster but Mark powerbombs his way out of a hurricanrana attempt. The middle rope moonsault DDT is countered with a dropkick but Mark’s springboard cutter is knocked out of the air.

Red cuts Jay off and comes in for a running kick to drop Mark. That lasts all of three seconds as Mark lays him out with a clothesline and brings Jay back in. Some of the rooms of the house are cleaned and we take another break. Back again with Mark suplexing Red for two and handing it back to Jay for a DDT. A front facelock keeps Red in trouble but he powers up and gets over to AJ….as Mark has the referee in a classic spot.

Red manages to kick Jay down and drop Mark on his head, allowing the hot tag off to AJ. The pace picks up so AJ can strike it out with Jay as everything breaks down. An assisted DDT plants Red for two but AJ is back in with a double DDT to both brothers. The Jay Driller and Styles Clash are both broken up, leaving Red to hit the super Code Red for two on Mark. Back up and AJ launches Red into the air for a super hurricanrana on Jay, sending him straight into the Styles Clash to retain the titles at 25:40.

Rating: A-. Yeah this was awesome and you could see that the Briscoes had all of the promise in the world. They still needed some extra ring time and seasoning but the base was there. These guys tore the house down and I wasn’t sure how it was going to end. I haven’t seen much of this time from Ring of Honor so it’s pretty cool to see how good some of this stuff can be.

We see a montage of all twelve Tag Team Title wins. That’s pretty awesome actually as it shows you just how many changes have taken place over the years. If nothing else, it’s weird seeing the Briscoes grow hair.

We look at Jay Briscoe’s two World Title wins.

From Global Wars 2018.

Briscoes vs. Cody/Hangman Page

Brandi Rhodes is here with Cody and Page. Mark and Hangman (who looks VERY young here) start things off with an exchange of shots to the face before they glare each other down. Jay and Cody come in for the staredown before Cody works on the wristlock. We take a break (apparently due to the power going out in the building) and come back with the Briscoes taking turns on Page in the corner.

Jay knocks Cody off the apron and kicks Page in the head for two as Colt Cabana (on commentary) makes chicken references. Page gets over to Cody for the tag and it’s time to clean house as Ian Riccaboni recaps what fans missed when the power was out (with Sabu references abounding for a good chuckle).

Back in and Jay pounds Cody down in the corner but Brandi grabs a chair…which seems to scare Mark off. Mark gets back inside and hits a Death Valley Driver but has to roll out of the Froggy Bow. The double tag brings in Jay to slug it out with Page and we take a break (TV, not power out). Back with Page blasting Mark with a clothesline for two but Jay’s neckbreaker gets the same on Page.

Redneck Boogie gets two more but Brandi gets on the apron, with Mark being whipped into her. Brandi grabs her shoulder and the distraction lets Mark kick Cody low. The Buckshot Lariat drops Mark though and a top rope moonsault to the floor takes out both Briscoes. Cross Rhodes gets two on Jay, who brawls to the floor with Cody. That leaves Mark to slip out of a super Rite of Passage (Deadeye) as Cody is whipped into the barricade. Back in and the Jay Driller sets up the Froggy Bow to give Mark the pin at 18:25.

Rating: B+. Another hard hitting and energetic match, which shouldn’t be a surprise. The Briscoes can hang with anyone and it makes sense to put some of the top AEW guys going today in here. That being said, it isn’t exactly an important match for the Briscoes and it would have been nice to see one of their title wins in full. I’ll take what I can get though and this was rather great stuff.

One more Briscoes video wraps us up.

Overall Rating: A. This was great and that is an awesome thing to see. What mattered here was making the Briscoes look good and that is what they did here. The team has been one of the only standards for all of Ring of Honor’s history and there was so, so much to pick from here. I could have absolutely gone for a three or more hour version of this because the Briscoes have more great matches than anyone else in Ring of Honor history. Check this out if you’re a fan of the team and then go see some more of them, because they’re an all time great team.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 7, 2022
Location: Ball Arena, Denver, Colorado
Commentators: Jim Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

We have less than two weeks to go before Elimination Chamber and a lot of the big matches are set. Since this is Raw, we have two Elimination Chamber matches set up, plus Becky Lynch vs. Lita, as Smackdown doesn’t seem all that important this month. Tonight is a special show since we are on SyFy due to the Winter Olympics, so we have NO COMMERCIALS in the first hour. I’m thrilled too. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open big with the final round of the Academic Challenge between RKBro and the Alpha Academy. This time around, it’s a Quiz Bowl competition and after looking at the spelling bee/scooter race being split, we’re ready to go. Chad Gable explains the rules: it’s one point per question and if you get it wrong, the other team gets to steal. One point per answer, first to give points wins.

Alpha Academy gets the history question (who was the first President with a college degree) right but Riddle evens it up in biology (how many hearts does an octopus have). They trade Greek Mythology (who flew too close to the sun) and Cartoons (which Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle used nunchucks) and it’s tied at two. Otis knows that Texas is the biggest of the 48 continental states but Riddle doesn’t know whose father-in-law Justin Bieber is. Randy guesses Alec Baldwin (of the four Baldwin choices) and gets it wrong, only for Gable to steal the point (with Stephen Baldwin) and goes up 4-2.

Film And Literature doesn’t go so well as Gable thinks Romeo and Juliet has been made into more films than Hamlet. Riddle knows it though and it’s 4-3. Orton picks Sports and gets a question about the Denver Broncos, which the fans help him get right. With the score tied at 4-4, Gable insults the fans and gets the final category of Metric Conversions. Gable doesn’t know how many grams are in an ounce, but Orton gets it right for the win. Gable goes into a huge rant and keeps getting buzzed. Cue the Street Profits to say Alpha Academy owes RKBro a title shot, but Gable wants a match right now.

Alpha Academy vs. Street Profits

Non-title. Ford strikes away at Gable to start and everything breaks down early on. Gable kicks Ford out to the apron for a breather and it’s Otis coming in to slow it down a bit. The big splash crushes Ford and it’s off to the neck crank to make it worse. A running splash in the corner connects but Ford avoids a second to send Otis into the post.

The double tag brings in Dawkins to slug away at Gable. Dawkins hits a running splash in the corner and grabs a t-bone suplex for a bonus. Otis has to make a save so Ford hits a big running flip dive to take him down on the floor. That leaves Gable to pull Dawkins into the ankle lock and the counter gives Gable the pin at 5:37.

Rating: C+. Both teams looked good here and the counter into the clean pin was a nice way to go. Gable and Otis get some extra momentum on the way to whenever they have to defend their titles against RKBro. Good for a fast TV match though and I’ll take what I can get from something like that on Raw.

Video on Lita.

MVP brings out Bobby Lashley, complete with his own Paul Heyman style intro. Hometown boy Lashley gets the kind of reception that you would expect and MVP talks about how Lashley took the title from Brock Lesnar. Then Lesnar won the Royal Rumble and has earned another shot at Wrestlemania. Well done, but now he wants in the Elimination Chamber as well, which is pure fantasy.

Lesnar is in the match but taking the title from Lashley is pure fantasy. Lashley says THE CHAMP LIVES HERE before talking about how Lesnar disrespected him. Last week Lesnar came to the show and said he wanted to get into the chamber. What Lesnar doesn’t realize is that he’ll be locked inside with Lashley. After the Elimination Chamber, Lashley is going to Wrestlemania with his title. Pretty simple and to the point promo here.

We look at Alexa Bliss getting her (replica) Lily doll last week.

This week, Bliss seems to love the doll but hands it over to the therapist, leaving her in tears.

Damian Priest vs. AJ Styles

Non-title. Styles ducks some shots in the corner and chops away before getting dropped with a jumping elbow to the jaw. Priest is sent outside for a slingshot forearm but comes right back with a running clothesline inside. Styles slips out of a superplex and has to escape the Reckoning.

The Styles Clash is broken up as well so Styles hits a fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. A kick to the head staggers Styles though and a bulldog driver gets two. Another exchange of strikes to the head goes to Styles…but Priest falls on top of him for two anyway. That was a bit odd but Priest is fine enough to break up the Phenomenal Forearm. AJ is right back with the Phenomenal Forearm for the pin at 4:55.

Rating: B-. For those of you keeping track, that is Priest’s third straight singles loss and fifth out of six singles matches. I would really like to believe that WWE isn’t cooling off on him but that seems to be the situation at the moment. Other than that, we had a good match here with Styles getting a win before he moves on to a bigger match. I’m sure the only way to build him up was a win over the United States Champion too.

Smackdown Breakdown.

Seth Rollins mocks Kevin Owens for not making it into the Elimination Chamber but Owens thinks he might be lying. That’s a negative from Rollins, who laughs a lot.

It’s time for MizTV with Maryse here with Miz. They waste no time in bringing out the Mysterios as this week’s guests (with Miz and Maryse dancing during the entrance). Miz mocks Dominik for losing last week and puts his hand up to silence the crowd. Of course Miz didn’t cheat to win last week, unlike Edge and Beth Phoenix at the Royal Rumble.

Miz talks about how he used the Money in the Bank contract to become WWE Champion last year but the fans still think he is a cheater. Somehow though, Rey Mysterio is on the cover of WWE2K22 instead of the Miz. What does Rey have that Miz or Maryse doesn’t? Maryse thinks she was great at the Rumble and thinks Rey should call himself Rey Marysesterio. Dominik gets in Miz’s face and the rematch is on. Miz likes the guts, and thinks Dominik is Eddie Guerrero’s son.

Dominik Mysterio vs. Miz

Dominik starts fast by taking Miz down but Maryse breaks up the 619. That’s enough for an ejection, but Miz kicks Dominik in the face anyway. The referee gets rid of Maryse so Rey trips Miz, allowing Dominik to grab the pin at 1:40.

Post match Dominik does the Eddie Guerrero dance to celebrate.

Nikki Ash vs. Bianca Belair

Belair, whose hair is a bit more down this week, runs her over to start and does her dance. The delay lets Nikki tie Belair’s leg up in the ropes and put on a half crab. That’s broke up and Belair hits a fall away slam into some slams, albeit with some limping. Some rolling suplexes get two on Nikki but she’s back with a tornado DDT; Belair catches her with a kick in the corner though and it’s the KOD to finish Nikki at 3:57.

Rating: C. The selling was pretty good, though maybe Belair stopping to dance while selling the leg wasn’t the best look. Belair is great at the athleticism but she goes with that dance WAY too much. Other than that, Nikki’s crash continues, but at least she got in some offense here. She is just going to be cannon fodder in the chamber, but this could have been more of a squash.

The 24/7 chase continues, with Dana Brooke saying Reggie is such a sweet guy. She kisses him on the cheek, but says they’re really good friends. They hug, with Reggie teasing a regular kiss before the 24/7 goons chase them off.

Kevin Owens vs. Austin Theory

Theory goes intense to start and stomps him down in the corner, followed by a hard whip into another corner. Back up and Owens sends him into the corner, setting up a trip to the floor. A flip dive off the steps crushes Theory and we take a break. Back with Owens hitting a Cannonball to send Theory outside.

The frog splash off the apron crushes Theory for two back inside but they trade finisher escapes. Owens’ spinning superplex is broken up so he settles for a super Regal Roll. The Swanton only hits raised knees but Owens blocks a rolling something with a superkick. Owens Stuns him for the pin at 9:00.

Rating: C+. They were packing in a good bit of action here, which is partially due to Owens dropping some weight in recent months. He has been moving better as a result and the matches have improved as well. Theory losing again is likely to make Vince McMahon angry, which could make for another step forward. Given McMahon’s interactions, it would seem that Theory has a perfectly fine future and that’s nice to see.

Randy Orton gives Riddle a pep talk/advice for the Elimination Chamber but tells him to focus on Seth Rollins tonight. Riddle is grateful and even invites Orton to a celebratory toga party next week. Orton seems ready to shake his head.

Veer Mahaan is still coming.

Here is Lita for a chat. She was fired up to get to be in the Royal Rumble with some of the biggest stars today. Then she showed up on Raw to challenge Becky Lynch, because she has been wanting that match for a long time. Cue Lynch to say how much that means to her. She has wanted to be Lita for so long but now that she is the champ, there is need for Lita.

Lynch is the star around here and now Lita shows up around the most important time of the year asking for a title shot? Lita talks about how she was some punk rock kid who chased her dreams. The people made her a four time Women’s Champion, but Lynch says Lita can keep the people. The fight is on with Becky getting the better of things but making the mistake of going back. That means a Twist of Fate into the Litasault to leave Becky laying. Lita still isn’t a great talker, but they both got the point across here.

Kevin Owens comes up to Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville about taking Austin Theory’s place in the Elimination Chamber. That isn’t happening, because last week’s qualifying matches were final. Owens wants to go to Wrestlemania as WWE Champion and talks about how much Texas means to him. He basically begs but nothing is said.

Liv Morgan vs. Doudrop

Doudrop goes with the power to start so Morgan tries the eternally bad idea of trying a choke. Morgan gets driven into the corner though and we take a break. Back with Doudrop hitting the backsplash but Morgan manages to fight up. A series of strikes rock Doudrop and the springboard spinning Codebreaker gets two. Morgan’s hurricanrana is countered into an electric chair faceplant for a near fall, followed by the Vader Bomb to crush Morgan for the pin at 8:09.

Rating: C-. Call it a hunch, but the fact that Morgan is clearly on the downside of her big push made it clear that she was losing here. The fact that Doudrop has already lost her title shot doesn’t matter. Morgan’s time near the title is over and that is kind of a shame, as the fans seemed ready to go with her, but that doesn’t seem to be happening anytime soon.

We look at Alexa Bliss’ therapy earlier.

And now, more of Bliss’ therapy. She has been trying to control her anger but might have beaten up a woman (who looked like Lily) at the grocery store. The therapist thinks they have more work to do.

Seth Rollins has done everything but headline Wrestlemania as WWE Champion so he’ll have to win the title in the Elimination Chamber.

Seth Rollins vs. Riddle

Rollins throws him down to start but Riddle grabs an early armbar. With that broken up, Rollins takes it outside for a buckle bomb against the barricade and we take a break. Back with Riddle fighting out of a chinlock but getting caught with an Alberto top rope double stomp instead. Riddle blocks a clothesline with a kick to the head though and the forearms in the corner rock Rollins again. Riddle sends him outside for the apron kick to the chest and a springboard Floating Bro. Cue Kevin Owens to jump Riddle for the DQ at 7:49.

Rating: C. This was starting to get going before the ending, which was a good way to protect both of them. I’m not sure how much sense it makes to have either of the people in a World Title match so this could have been a lot worse. That being said, I think you can guess what is coming in the rest of the show.

Post match the beatdown is on until Randy Orton runs in for the save and let’s do that tag match thing.

RKBro vs. Kevin Owens/Seth Rollins

Joined in progress with Orton working on Rollins and taking him outside for a drop onto the announcers’ table. Back in and it’s off to Riddle but Owens comes in off a blind tag and takes over. The backsplash gets two on Riddle and Owens mocks Orton a bit for a bonus. Rollins adds a top rope ax handle and an elbow to the jaw cuts off the comeback bid.

A double stomp gives Owens two and there’s a heck of a chop in the corner. Rollins misses the big frog splash and Riddle’s jumping knee drops Owens. There’s the hot tag to Orton to start cleaning house but Rollins blocks the RKO. It’s back to Riddle, who gets caught with a rolling elbow to the face. Another one to the back of the head sets up the Stomp for the pin at 8:05.

Rating: C+. There are your #1 contenders, who managed to get a title shot and then lose a match in the span of about two and a half hours. I know the Tag Team Titles don’t mean anything but could they at least pretend like they matter? Rollins getting a win means more and his story is more important, though you would think they might have a better idea on how to do this.

Post match Orton hits Owens with an RKO to blow off some steam and end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The word “bleh” comes to mind with this one, as it felt like a bunch of filling in time before we get to the important stuff next Saturday. That makes for a really dull three hours, with the extra fifteen minutes without commercials in the first hour making it worse. There was good action here, but it was more 50/50 booking and people not getting much of anywhere. I want to see how Elimination Chamber goes but they aren’t making the build to it all that thrilling.

Results
Alpha Academy b. Street Profits – Rollup to Dawkins
AJ Styles b. Damian Priest – Phenomenal Forearm
Dominik Mysterio b. Miz – Rollup
Bianca Belair b. Nikki Ash – KOD
Kevin Owens b. Austin Theory – Stunner
Doudrop b. Liv Morgan -Vader Bomb
Riddle b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered
Seth Rollins/Kevin Owens b. RKBro – Stomp to Riddle

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 31, 2022
Location: Heritage Bank Center, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves

The Royal Rumble has come and gone and that means we are officially on the Road To WrestleMania. As a result, it is time to start hammering in the pieces for the next elimination based match, as Elimination Chamber is in less than two weeks. Bobby Lashley is the new WWE Champion and that means he is going to need a challenger. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Brock Lesnar losing the WWE Title to Bobby Lashley with the help of Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman. Worry not though as Lesnar won the Royal Rumble later in the night, because being screwed out of a title leaves you with absolutely no other options to get another title shot. The graphic even saying “1 hour and 22 minutes later” doesn’t help things.

Here is Adam Pearce in the ring to hype up the big things we will be seeing tonight. There is a road block on the Road To Wrestlemania though, which is called the Elimination Chamber. Bobby Lashley will be defending his WWE Title inside the Elimination Chamber….and here are MVP and Lashley to interrupt. MVP rants about Lashley being in the Chamber and Lashley says he is here to celebrate beating Lesnar. Lashley is a better wrestler, a better mixed martial artist and a better champion. Who’s the conqueror now? Who’s the beast now? Who’s the champion now?

Cue Brock Lesnar, in wrestling gear, to interrupt. He talks about how Lashley didn’t really beat him, but Lesnar isn’t mad at him. Instead, he is mad at Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman, but what matters is that he won the Royal Rumble. That isn’t a joke, because Lesnar is going to face Reigns at Wrestlemania. Lashley is involved too though, because it is going to be title for title.

Lesnar challenges Lashley for his rematch right now and Lashley is already taking the tie off. MVP says not so fast though, because Lesnar has to earn it. Lesnar calls Lashley a chickens*** and Lashley is a lot more serious. MVP begs him not to and Lashley bails, but Pearce puts Lesnar inside the Elimination Chamber for the title instead.

Nikki Ash vs. Rhea Ripley

Nikki goes right at her to start but gets caught in a delayed vertical suplex, with Rhea walking her around for a bonus. Nikki is sent outside but manages to tie her up in the ring skirt and fires off forearms as we take a break. Back with Nikki working on an armbar and hitting a tornado DDT for two. Ripley fights up with some clotheslines and nails a basement dropkick. Nikki is back with a failed fisherman’s neckbreaker attempt, setting up Riptide to give Ripley the pin at 8:04.

Rating: C-. That is all you needed it to be, as Ripley got the clean win. Now granted that probably means we will be seeing another three matches minimum, likely with Rhea winning over and over. That’s about all Ripley can do though, as it isn’t like she could be back in the title picture or anything insane like that.

We recap last week’s spelling bee, with Chad Gable losing, followed by a singles match, with Chad Gable losing.

Now it is time for Gable vs. Riddle in a scooter race, with Riddle dubbing his scooter Gustavo. After some complaining about last week’s spelling and an introduction of R-Truth as the official starter, they’re off, with the first to complete fifty laps around the arena and cross the finish line at ringside wins. More on this later.

We’re back to more of Alexa Bliss’ therapy, with Bliss insisting that she has had Lily since she was a kid. We get a montage of Bliss with Lily, with the therapist asking what would happen if she could see Lily again. The therapist brings out a replica (while making clear it isn’t the real thing) and she is very happy.

We look at Edge and Beth Phoenix beating Miz and Maryse at the Royal Rumble.

Miz vs. Dominik Mysterio

Rey Mysterio is here with Dominik. Miz gets serious by messing up Dominik’s hair but has to duck an early 619 attempt. That means a trip to the floor, where he shoves Rey down. Back in and Miz kicks Dominik in the face before falling down and claiming Rey tripped him. That’s enough to get Rey ejected and the Skull Crushing Finale finishes Dominik at 2:10.

Tamina jumps 24/7 Champion Dana Brooke but gets interrupted by the scooter race (now on lap 18/50).

The scooter race continues until Riddle runs into Omos. Riddle: “Omos, I’ve never noticed it before but you have beautiful eyes.” And he rides off.

It’s time for the Kevin Owens Show, with Owens talking about how excited he is for the Road to Wrestlemania. He is going to be in the Elimination Chamber after he beats Austin Theory, but for now, it is time for the man who should be Universal Champion: Seth Rollins! Cue a limping Rollins, who even agrees to sit down this week.

After a Cincinnati Bengals WHO DEY chant, we get a highlight package on Rollins beating Roman Reigns via DQ when Reigns kept choking him. Back in the arena, Owens says that was ridiculous but Rollins says he has a permanent piece of real estate in Reigns’ head. Whenever he goes back there, he will come back with the Universal Title. That’s Smackdown business though and we are on Monday Night Raw.

There are some spots available in the Elimination Chamber, but one of them is being taken up by….Seth Rollins! Owens’ isn’t happy that Rollins got in without having to qualify, but thinks Rollins could convince Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville to let them in. All he has to do is threaten to not wrestle unless Owens is in! Rollins: “Uhhhh……..” Cue Austin Theory to interrupt and it’s qualifying match time.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Kevin Owens vs. Austin Theory

Feeling out process to start with Owens using the power to take over. That earns him a rolling dropkick and some shots to the face in the corner before they head outside. Owens crushes him with the Cannonball against the barricade and Theory needs a breather. Theory manages to send him into the steps and we take a break.

Back with Owens hitting a DDT and heading up top but missing the Swanton. The ATL is countered so Theory hits a neckbreaker for two. Owens runs him over again and now the Swanton connects to give Owens two of his own. The spinning superplex gives Owens two more but Theory knocks him outside. Owens gets back in, but Theory kicks the ropes for a low blow. Back in and the ATL gives Theory the pin at 11:17.

Rating: B-. Theory continues to shine every chance he gets and getting a win over someone like Owens is only going to make his star brighter. There is a lot to him and I’m wondering just how far he can go. If nothing else, it is nice to see him getting a spot in a title match. Granted he won’t win, but that’s a good step.

Otis gives Chad Gable a drink for energy but it’s steak sauce. Gable: “SODIUM!” Otis drinks it as Gable panics away.

Angelo Dawkins vs. Dolph Ziggler

Hometown boy Dawkins (with Montez Ford) does the Icky Shuffle on the way to the ring to really make himself beloved. Ziggler takes him down to start and hammers away in the corner, setting up his own, albeit mocking, Icky Shuffle. Dawkins is back with a clothesline and the spinning splash in the corner. Ziggler’s superkick is blocked though and Dawkins hits the spinning butterfly suplex for the pin at 4:27.

Rating: C-. See how easy it is to give a hometown boy a win? They had a short match, the fans were happy with Dawkins winning, and Ziggler isn’t going to be hurt by a loss. This was all it needed to be and the fans got to smile. I don’t believe WWE is going to drop their trend of hurting hometown stars, but at least it was fine for one night.

Gable and Riddle are almost to the final lap.

WWE 2K22 ad.

Veer Mahaan is coming to Raw.

It’s time for the finals of the race. R-Truth is in the arena and picks the Bengals winning but Riddle knocks Gable down, leaving him with a banged up knee….but Otis runs Riddle over before he crosses the finish line. Gable gets up and wins without much trouble. Riddle protests, but Gable lists off all of his own accomplishments, none of which required cheating (Gable: “THANK YOU!”). Riddle can have his match, but against Otis. Hold on though as Adam Pearce has an announcement: this is now an Elimination Chamber qualifying match!

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Otis vs. Riddle

Otis takes him into the corner for a hard shot to the head to start, setting up the splash for a close two. The neck crank is on but Riddle fights up, only to get Judas Effected to the floor. Back in and Otis sends him flying off a shoulder and seems to do the old Razor Ramon pose for some reason.

Riddle fights out of another neck crank and forearms away, only to get knocked down by another clothesline. Otis puts on another neck crank so Riddle fights up even faster, this time for some running strikes in the corner. A ripcord knee puts Otis down on his knee and another puts him down. The Floating Bro hits Otis’ knee (as it missed badly) so it’s a Floating Bro to the standing Otis for the pin at 7:24.

Rating: C. Odd choice of a pose aside, this told a good story but in a boring way. Otis going for three neck cranks in a single match isn’t exactly exciting and that Floating Bro looked pretty bad. At least they got the ending right though, as Riddle or Randy Orton almost had to be in the Elimination Chamber. Again, Riddle won’t win, but it’s nice to see him get a chance.

Carmella vs. Bianca Belair

Carmella has to put her mask on before Belair can wrestle her down. The hair whip is loaded up so Carmella screams and slaps Belair in the face. Saxton: “That was stupid.” The chase is on until Carmella sends her into the corner and forearms away. Some elbows put Belair down again and we hit the chinlock. Belair fights up and gets knocked right back down into another chinlock. That’s broken up as well so it’s a forearm to set up the KOD to give Belair the pin at 5:32.

Rating: C-. Carmella was more aggressive here but it wasn’t much of a match. The mask gimmick continues to not add much and doesn’t seem to get over. The good thing is that Belair gets reheated a bit, though I have no idea where she is going with the title pictures pretty much set for the time being.

We look back at Alexa Bliss seeing the replacement Lily doll again.

Back in the office, Alexa Bliss is so happy to see Lily, who the therapist said he got from WWE Shop. Bliss holds the doll and smiles a lot. That’s it.

Chad Gable isn’t happy with Otis’ loss but has a good idea: the final part of the academic challenge will be a Quiz Bowl. Just like the Bengals losing their big game, RKBro will lose too.

We look at Ronda Rousey returning at the Royal Rumble.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Rey Mysterio vs. AJ Styles

They go with the grappling to start and neither can get anywhere. Styles hits a shoulder but Rey is back up with a running hurricanrana. That’s enough to send Styles outside but Rey’s sliding splash hits raised knees. Another hurricanrana takes Styles down again on the floor though and we take a break.

Back with Rey AJ countering a springboard moonsault but getting caught with a spinning DDT. A springboard spinning crossbody gives Rey two but AJ’s fireman’s carry backbreaker gets the same. The calf Crusher is broken up and Rey kicks him in the head for another near fall. Rey goes up but has to counter the super Styles Clash. The frog splash misses for Rey though and AJ scores with a Pele. That’s not enough for a cover though as Rey heads up for the top rope seated senton, only to have AJ roll through into the Styles Clash for the pin at 11:34.

Rating: B. I’m as shocked as you are that two of the best ever were able to have a good match when they were given the chance. Styles winning makes more sense and adds to the star power of the match, but it’s not like Rey is some slouch. This was a rather good main event and I could go for seeing a longer version on a bigger stage.

Here is Ronda Rousey for the big finale. She can’t decide if she should pick to face Charlotte or Rebecca at Wrestlemania. Rousey has unfinished business with both, but Rebecca is on her undercard. Then everyone will know the baddest big time b**** is her. Cue Becky Lynch, saying that she wants an answer too and that the women’s division has never been hotter. Lynch wants a decision so Rousey grabs the arm….and says the decision will come on Friday.

Rousey goes to leave so here is Lita to interrupt. Becky isn’t sure about this but talks about being a fan when she was a kid. She makes the mistake of asking why Lita is here though and the challenge for Elimination Chamber is thrown out. Becky says no, but Lita manages to goad her into it to end the show. Remember the multiple instances that seemed to point to Lita vs. Charlotte? WWE doesn’t seem to either.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was hit or miss and some of the promos didn’t work so well, but what mattered here was the effort. It felt like the people were trying and that made all the difference. Things like Miz vs. Dominik and Belair vs. Carmella weren’t great, but the scooter deal was inoffensive enough and they set up a lot of the Elimination Chamber. Either way, much better than the Rumble, if you consider that to be an accomplishment at this point.

Results
Rhea Ripley b. Nikki Ash – Riptide
Miz b. Dominik Mysterio – Skull Crushing Finale
Austin Theory b. Kevin Owens – ATL
Angelo Dawkins b. Dolph Ziggler – Double underhook spinning slam
Riddle b. Otis – Floating Bro
Bianca Belair b. Carmella – KOD
AJ Styles b. Rey Mysterio – Styles Clash

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

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