Smackdown
Date: August 14, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

We have less than two weeks to go before Summerslam and it’s time to try and juice the interest a bit. Last week saw Retribution show up on Smackdown and this week it’s a bunch of guest stars in a tri-brand battle royal for the shot at Bayley’s Smackdown Women’s Title. That could go a lot of different ways so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Retribution’s attacks and antics over the last few weeks.

Cole says that Retribution is “hiding behind current events.”

Big E. vs. John Morrison

Before the match, Big E. reminds us of his singles success and calls those who forget it false prophets. There’s no Miz here, but there are some flickering lights….and here’s Retribution. They chase off commentary and storm the ring, including taking out Big E.’s knee. A spear puts Big E. down and the team runs away, with Miz running out to check on Morrison. There were eight or nine of them this time but only about half of them got physical. No match of course.

Post break Big E. and Morrison are in the back with various wrestlers around them. Miz blames Big E. for sending out a tweet about Retribution, but here’s King Corbin to say Smackdown needs leadership. Corbin can lead them to safety so Big E. talks about how this is Smackdown. Cue Sheamus to say we need someone serious and he can smell the fear in Big E. because he’s lonely. Big E. says he’s not lonely and most of the wrestlers leave with him.

Here are Bayley and Sasha Banks for a chat. They can’t be held down by Stephanie McMahon and they’ll defend their Tag Team Titles at Payback. As for tonight, they don’t like commentary so they’ll handle the ring introductions for the battle royal.

Battle Royal

Peyton Royce, Billie Kay, Tegan Nox, Shotzi Blackheart, Lacey Evans, Naomi, Liv Morgan, Ruby Riott, Dana Brooke, Nikki Cross, Shayna Baszler, Bianca Belair, Tamina, Asuka

The winner gets a shot at Bayley’s Smackdown Women’s Title at Summerslam. Before the match, Sasha runs her mouth about Asuka a bit too much and here’s Asuka to chase her off. We come back for the opening bell and Riott is kicked out in a hurry. Morgan pulls Kay out and Royce follows her, but they pull Morgan out as well. The four get in a brawl on the outside and Cross is thrown outside, but not eliminated. Belair is thrown over but hands on by one hand for an impressive save.

As Cole confirms that they are leaving the Performance Center next week, Tamina superkicks Cross out and has the staredown with Belair. That doesn’t last long as Tamina is thrown out, meaning it’s time for Naomi to clean house for a bit. Lacey throws her to the apron, where Naomi kicks Shayna in the head but gets Woman’s Righted out. Shotzi gets rid of Lacey but Shayna grabs the Kirifuda Clutch on Shotzi and Lacey pulls Blackheart out.

Nox can’t whip Belair in but she can roll her throat first into the middle rope. Belair misses a charge and gets low bridged out. We’re down to Nox, Asuka, Baszler and Brooke (on the floor) with Nox hitting the reverse Cannonballs on the Raw women. Baszler blocks Nox’s chokeslam and picks her up (barely) for the elimination. Brooke gets back in and is tossed by Brooke, meaning it’s off to Asuka vs. Baszler.

With Bayley looking worried, Baszler kicks Asuka over the top and out to the apron, but Asuka kicks her down as well. Bayley and Banks interfere and get knocked down so Baszler knocks Asuka onto the apron….and she lands on the champs, meaning no elimination. Asuka pulls Baszler out for the win at 8:05, meaning she’s facing both Banks and Bayley for both singles titles.

Rating: C. This was fine and Asuka getting both shots is certainly a different way to go. It’s not like there is anyone else who could be a viable option to challenge Bayley at the moment. I can get the idea of going with the safe pick, but at some point they need to actually elevate someone else. That’s going to mean more than just putting someone out there as the challenger of the month too, and WWE hasn’t seemed interested in doing that on Smackdown for a long time.

Post break Asuka jumps Bayley from behind and has to be held back.

We look at Sonya Deville jumping Mandy Rose two weeks ago.

Mandy doesn’t think much of Sonya saying she’s just a pretty face because she has heard it all before. She has been called a Barbie who has everything handed to her her whole life, but she worked three jobs to put herself through college while winning a Miss Bikini World Title. Is that being handed everything? If Sonya hates her that much, put her money where her mouth is and let’s have a hair vs. hair match at Summerslam. Then we’ll see how ugly it gets. This was better than any other Mandy promo, but that isn’t much of a bar to clear.

Sheamus tells security to enjoy themselves because no one is attacking him tonight.

Nikki Cross sees Alexa Bliss (who she should have seen as both of them seem to have been standing in the same place for a little while) and hugs her but Bliss needs to be alone to deal with this Fiend stuff.

Sheamus vs. Shorty G.

Sheamus powers him into the corner to start but Shorty takes him down by the leg. A chinlock is broken up in a hurry and Sheamus ax handles him in the face. Shorty gets in a rolling kick to the face and a missile dropkick gives him two of his own. Sheamus has had it though and hits White Noise into the Brogue Kick for the pin at 3:35.

Rating: D+. And there’s another loss for Gable, because we were dumb enough to believe that they might actually do something good with him for once. As long as he has that name, nothing is going to matter whatsoever with him though and when you add in the losses, it isn’t exactly looking great for his future. Not a good match either, but being on TV is better than being on the sidelines.

AJ Styles yells at an agent over something on a computer. That agent would be better known as Abyss, albeit in his Joseph Park attire.

Here’s AJ Styles, with the yet to be named Park and a board covered with a black sheet, to rant about how he has beaten a bunch of people and needs a new opponent. After plugging his Twitch channel, AJ talks about how fans have been telling him that he needs to face certain opponents because statistically, they are his best opponents. AJ has been watching baseball and football and realizes that he is a stud of a stats nerd himself. That brings him to Park, who is his Phenomenal Intercontinental Statistic System. AJ: “IT’S A WORK IN PROGRESS!”

Based on the statistics, let’s see who is #1 one on the board. That would be AJ Styles, and, after consulting with Joseph Park (who AJ mentions by name), we see that no one is #2-5, because no one has earned a shot at the champ. Cue Jeff Hardy to interrupt to say he never got a fair shot at the title because of Sheamus.

That title is important to him because it was his first singles title in WWE. Now he’s back on his feet and the idea of Hardy vs. Styles sounds mega cool. AJ says he respects Jeff but of course he can’t have a title shot. Jeff jumps AJ, hits Park, and nails the Twist of Fate on Styles. Hardy writes his name on the board in a nice touch.

Cesaro and Shinsuke Nakamura are in the back but Lucha House Party steals their titles. The chase is on.

AJ promises to erase Jeff Hardy, but the marker is permanent. The match seems to be on though.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Gran Metalik

Cesaro and Lince Doradn are here too, with Cesaro taking the titles back early on. Feeling out process to start with Nakamura taking him into the corner, only to have Metalik stop a charge with a shot to the face. Metalik hits a springboard elbow to the face for two and loads up the rope walk, but Cesaro offers a distraction.

Nakamura kicks him out of the air for a cocky near fall and grabs the reverse exploder. Kinshasa is loaded up but here’s the returning Kalisto (I believe in his first appearance this year) to take out Cesaro. The distraction lets Metalik kick Nakamura in the head and hit the rope walk elbow for the upset at 4:10.

Rating: C-. The action was good enough but the point of this was the return of Kalisto, which at least makes the House Party a little more credible. Dorado and Metalik are good but they haven’t actually won anything. Kalisto has won a bunch of titles and while it has been a good while ago, it’s better than what his partners have done.

Matt Riddle, after assuring that it’s ok to refer to Kayla Braxton as bro, isn’t worried about the King’s Ransom on his head. He’s tried to fight King Corbin but it’s clear that Corbin is just a royal pain. Cue Shorty G. to say he’s sorry and he was just looking out for his family. Injuring someone isn’t his thing and everything seems to be cool. Riddle is down for a fight anytime, but here’s Corbin to jump Riddle from behind. Corbin thanks Shorty, and even calls him Chad. Gable doesn’t seem sure of what just happened.

We get a sitdown interview with Alexa Bliss, who talks about her relationship with Braun Strowman. This includes a highlight package of their time together, including their rather adorable Mixed Match Challenge vignettes. She isn’t sure if anything would ever happen romantically between the two of them, but they have to talk about the Fiend. Bliss knows what it means to be in his presence and it really is like a moth being drawn to a flame. We see Strowman’s comments from last week where he said he didn’t care about her. Bliss is too emotional to speak to wrap it up.

Next week: AJ Styles defends against Jeff Hardy.

Sonya Deville accepts Mandy Rose’s challenge and can’t wait to see her bald.

Big E. vs. John Morrison

Miz is on commentary and praises Morrison’s mastery of all the martial arts. Miz: “He’s even a great painter!” Big E. has a taped up knee so Morrison goes straight for the target. Morrison heads up top but gets shoved down in a hurry. That’s enough to set up the apron splash but Big E. goes after Miz, allowing Morrison to get in a chop block. Miz has to get a fresh headset as Morrison grabs a chinlock. Cue Otis with the Money in the Bank briefcase but the lights start flickering. Cole calls for security and we take a break.

Back with the lights flickering again and the locker room at ringside for security. We cut to the back where Retribution is wrecking things, including beating up some referees and a lone wrestler. They lock someone in the bathroom and throw a bunch of chairs, but since no this isn’t on the screen for no adequately explained reason (They can play entrance videos but not show a backstage feed?), the wrestlers at ringside don’t know anything about it.

Cue Jessika Carr to deliver the message so the locker room runs to the back. Retribution is gone and the wrestlers aren’t happy with the crossed out WWE logo spray painted on the wall. Big E. shoves Morrison off the ropes and hits the Rock Bottom out of the corner for two. Morrison escapes the Big Ending and kicks at the knee as Miz explains that he cares about Morrison too much to go backstage. Big E. grabs the Stretch Muffler for the quick tap at 11:49.

Rating: C-. It was hard to focus on the match here as there was so much going on at the same time. This felt more like an Attitude Era style angle with a bunch of other stuff going on and the match as a backdrop, which is fine enough as it’s not exactly something important. At least Big E. got the win as well, as they haven’t managed to derail the singles push. Yet.

Post match here’s Sheamus to brogue Kick Big E. but here’s Braun Strowman (now bald) to scare everyone else off.

Post break Strowman says Fiend knows what he’s getting at Summerslam so get out here and face your fears. Strowman is going to eviscerate him and consume his entrails…but here’s Alexa Bliss instead. She says they need to talk but Strowman says she used him. He’s like a pawn that she used to get him to sing songs in her stupid car. Bliss wants to know what is going on, so Strowman explains that the Fiend changes everyone, including her. So get out of here, because he wants the Fiend.

Bliss tells him to be careful what he wishes for and offers to slap some sense into him. She demands he look at her and hits a heck of a slap before doing it over and over. Strowman picks her up in a gorilla press…and there go the lights. Strowman shouts for the Fiend and slams Bliss down as the lights go completely out. They come back in red with Fiend having replaced Strowman. Strowman appears on the screen and laughs, with Fiend doing the same, to end the show.

The Bliss stuff is a little more interesting but when you have Strowman reading what sounds like the results you get from looking up your promo in a thesaurus, you can only take it so seriously. Strowman still can’t talk and since his entire character is built around being really strong, he doesn’t have the emotional depth to make something like this work out. Also it has been about three months now and they need to wrap it up already.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling wasn’t the point here, but the big positive is the same thing that was the case on Raw: it feels like they have a focus and an idea that they’re going for on this show. I’ll take a slightly weaker show with a point than a bunch of meaningless stuff week after week. They set up stuff for next week and for Summerslam and that’s a heck of a lot better than Raw and Smackdown tends to do. Not a great show, but it’s a lot better than what they had been doing in recent months.

Results

Asuka won a battle royal last eliminating Shayna Baszler

Sheamus b. Shorty G. – Brogue Kick

Gran Metalik b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Top rope elbow

Big E. b. John Morrison – Stretch Muffler

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: July 31, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Corey Graves, Michael Cole

Summerslam is getting closer and closer but at the same time we have a lot to do on the way there. That includes a pair of title matches this week as AJ Styles defends the Intercontinental Title against Gran Metalik and Nikki Cross gets another shot at Bayley’s Smackdown Women’s Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Bayley is ready to beat Nikki Cross again and Sasha Banks laughs a lot.

Nikki says her confidence was in the gutter after Extreme Rules but last week she beat Alexa Bliss, who is better than Bayley and Banks.

Big E. says Xavier Woods and Kofi Kingston are in his heart and mind. Tonight, Miz feels the power.

Miz isn’t worried about Big E. having a singles career. John Morrison thinks it sounds like a bad spinoff.

Lacey Evans is ready for the nasty Naomi.

Naomi promises to make Lacey feel the glow.

Gran Metalik wants the Intercontinental Title (in Spanish).

AJ Styles is ready to teach Metalik a lesson.

We go to the Firefly Fun House where Bray Wyatt has a snorkel because he was looking for Braun Strowman. Though maybe the alligators have already eaten Braun. All Bray ever wanted to do was save Braun but now HE is awake and HE wants something Braun has. Until HE gets it, none of you are safe. Let him in.

Intercontinental Title: AJ Styles vs. Gran Metalik

Metalik is challenging and has Lince Dorado with him. AJ drives him into the corner to start and we’re at an early standoff. Some kicks to the ribs take Metalik down and Styles sends him face first into the buckle. There’s a suplex for two and AJ whips him hard into the corner but misses an elbow.

Metalik sends him outside and cuts AJ off at the legs. A running hurricanrana off the apron takes AJ down and we take a break. Back with Metalik hitting a high crossbody but a monkey flip is blocked. AJ starts in on the leg by cranking away on the mat, including a half crab to send Metalik to the rope.

Metalik slips out of the fireman’s carry neckbreaker and snaps off a tornado DDT for a hotter than expected near fall. There’s the rope walk dropkick for two more but AJ is right back with the Phenomenal Blitz. The Phenomenal Forearm misses though and Metalik hits an enziguri for the double breather. Metalik walks the ropes again but AJ knocks him out of the air. The Calf Crusher makes Metalik tap at 14:24.

Rating: B-. This is the kind of thing I can go for: have AJ Styles working with some random wrestler and getting a good match out of him. Metalik can do some good stuff on his own, but Styles is the kind of guy who can do whatever he wants with anyone and make it look easy. Nice stuff here and a perfectly fine match to open the show.

Post match Dorado checks on Metalik and gets taken out with the Styles Clash.

King Corbin comes up to Shorty G. and talks about how overlooked Gable has been. All of the short jokes were there to motivate him, and he can do that against Matt Riddle tonight. Gable seems to think about things. As usual, it’s amazing how much all of the energy that opener put together goes away as soon as Corbin shows up.

We look back at the bar fight last week.

Here’s Hardy for a chat. Jeff has not felt this good in a long time and knows that, as a fan shouts, Sheamus sucks. Last week was a reminder that he is on the right path. It’s true that he is an alcoholic but he is also a loving husband and a WWE star. That is what makes him never want to let anyone down again and he is fighting the struggle every day. Cue King Corbin to say enough about the sobriety stuff.

What is going on around here? Hardy is standing in the ring talking about how tough things is so suck it up and deal with it. Corbin has to deal with that idiotic Matt Riddle who can’t keep his shows and tonight he has to face Drew Gulak. Hardy says maybe Corbin is the real problem but Corbin thinks Hardy is more concerned about sitting in a circle, talking about the twelve steps and collecting coins. Gulak jumps him from behind and we’re off. Well after a break that is. So yeah, Corbin is now in two stories at once, assuming we’re not counting Gulak as a third.

Drew Gulak vs. King Corbin

Joined in progress with Gulak working on the arm and throwing Corbin down. A stomp to the arm sets up the hammerlock as Corbin is sent into the corner. Corbin right hands him out of the corner though and Gulak is rocked in a hurry. It’s off to a half crab on Gulak, with Corbin turning it into the middle of the ring.

That’s reverses into a YES Lock but Corbin gets out and reaches the rope. Some running dropkicks have Corbin in trouble and Gulak adds a top rope clothesline for two. Corbin is back with Deep Six but here’s Matt Riddle for a distraction, setting up a small package for two. Not that it matters as the End of Days finishes Gulak at 5:12.

Rating: C. And yes of course we keep Corbin going because he must be on the show no matter what happens. Corbin continues to do his thing and if we have to see him, I would rather have him in the ring than on the microphone, though it is the lesser of two evils at best. Gulak continues to be a great hand in the ring and that isn’t a bad spot to have.

Post match Riddle runs in and goes after Corbin but Shorty G. runs in with a suplex to Riddle and a smile to Corbin.

Big E. vs. The Miz

John Morrison is here with Miz while Big E. is alone, as commentary makes very clear. Miz gets driven into the corner so Big E. can hit the hip swiveling. Then it’s a fireman’s carry into more swiveling, setting up the spanking abdominal stretch. Miz gets out and slaps him in the face for some reason, which doesn’t go well. They head outside with Miz being sent into various things but Morrison hits a flipping kick off the steps.

Miz gets in a kick to the face and it’s a top rope ax handle back inside. Big E. powers out of a chinlock and sends him to the apron for a clothesline. The apron splash misses though and we take a break. Back with Big E. fighting out of another chinlock but getting kick in the face for two. Big E. is back up again with some belly to belly suplexes into the Warrior Splash. The Big Ending and Skull Crushing Finale are blocked so Miz hits the DDT for two more. There are the YES Kicks but Big E reverses one into a failed powerbomb attempt.

Miz kicks the knee out and kicks away at it in the corner. Some running knees are countered into a not great Rock Bottom out of the corner but the spear through the ropes is countered with another knee. Morrison gets on the apron for a kick to the head though and the Skull Crushing Final gets two. Miz grabs the Figure Four but Big E. gets over to the rope. Morrison teases another kick but gets caught this time for an ejection. Miz panics for a good while and gets rolled up for two, followed by a Stretch Muffler of all things to make Miz tap at 14:00.

Rating: C-. They needed to cut some of the time out of this as Big E. didn’t quite look like a breakout star. The idea of him being out there on his own makes sense, assuming you ignore his Intercontinental Title, NXT Title, and long successful run as part of the New Day. They’re treating him like some rookie who has never done this before and that doesn’t exactly fit anything about him. I liked the ending, but this needed to be about five minutes shorter.

Cesaro and Shinsuke Nakamura are celebrating when Lucha House Party comes in. They seem interested in a title shot but Cesaro makes fun of Metalik for choking.

Sheamus talks about making the mistake of fighting Jeff Hardy in a bar. No matter how many bottles Sheamus broke over his head, he knew Hardy was fueled by alcohol. Hardy is no longer his problem and that’s bad news for Smackdown. Now, he is the locker room’s problem.

Lacey Evans vs. Naomi

Before the match, Lacey promises to make everyone feel sorry for Naomi when she beats her again. Lacey takes her into the corner to start and goes to tie Naomi’s hair around the rope. That’s broken up as Naomi tries a hurricanrana, earning herself a powerbomb. Naomi’s back is bent around the post with Lacey pulling on the hair, followed by a hard posting.

Lacey traps the hair in the steps but Naomi beats the count and knocks her outside again. Naomi tries a sliding….I want to say sunset bomb or Canadian Destroyer but she loses Lacey on the flip and sends her flying instead, with Cole even asking what the heck that was. Back in and Lacey ties the hair into the ropes again but this time Naomi comes out with a backslide for the pin at 3:18.

Rating: D. I’d love to know who the producer was for this because they probably need to be demoted. It felt like they had about five ideas but none of them were developed and it turned into a mess. Lacey trying to tie the hair up over and over was as close as they got to a point, but the big spot was so horribly botched and I’m still not sure why I should care about Lacey being mad over a karaoke contest. Naomi and Lacey could both be developed into something, though it isn’t happening like this.

Otis and Mandy Rose are here and have plans for a date, with Mandy making some suggestive statements involving food. They’ll be ready in a few minutes but Sonya Deville looks on.

Post break Sonya jumps Mandy and covers her face with makeup. She cuts off a bunch of Mandy’s hair too while screaming about wanting to ruin Mandy’s life. Sonya grabs some electric clippers but referees come in for the save.

After a quick chat from commentary on what we just saw, Heavy Machinery comes in to check on Mandy. Miz and Morrison come int o ask where the adults are because Mandy now looks like a soccer mom. Miz: “Rest asheered, we will take care of this.” Morrison: “Don’t cut it short.” Otis glares them off.

We recap Bayley vs. Nikki Cross, which included Bayley beating her at Extreme Rules and injuring her ribs.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Nikki Cross

Bayley is defending and Sasha Banks and Alexa Bliss are the seconds. Cross starts fast by knocking Bayley around and hitting a monkey flip. The Purge is broken up so Nikki slams her head first into the mat over and over. Bayley is back with a shot in the ropes but Nikki sends her outside in a crash as we take a break. We come back with Bayley running Nikki over and sending her into the buckle. A belly to back suplex drops Nikki on her head for two but a shot to the throat gets her out of trouble.

There’s a tornado DDT for two on Bayley and a reverse DDT onto the apron has her in more trouble. Back in and Nikki gets two off a Regal Cutter but Bayley snaps her throat first across the rope. Bayley goes over to the announcers’ table to mock Nikki’s dance for reasons of general cockiness, allowing Nikki to take her down by the leg. A dropkick through the ropes takes Sasha down and they fight over some rollups for two each. Bayley pops back up and hits the bulldog driver to retain at 10:30.

Rating: C+. They were just starting to cook and then Bayley finished her in a hurry to retain. It didn’t last long but they had me believing they might pull the surprise for a bit. That’s hard to do given how dominant Bayley has been but they need to have someone give her a real challenge because you can only do these same things over and over so many times.

Post match Bayley and Banks leave and the copyright comes up but we stay with Bliss trying to help Nikki up. Nikki says no and shoves her down before leaving on her own. Cue the Fiend of all people to kneel next to Bliss and hold out his hand, which she looks at while shaking her head. Fiend Mandible Claws Bliss to end the show. If we have to do this one more time, that’s a different enough way to go to make it more interesting.

Overall Rating: C. This was a show where they were trying hard and coming close to making it work but then something cut it off. Whether it was Corbin or the Naomi vs. Evans match or reminding us that Hardy is an alcoholic every few segments, this show had a lot of speed bumps and couldn’t overcome all of them. The good stuff was good though, with some solid matches and the potential of Big E. getting his singles push (just don’t have him beat Morrison next week and burn off more of his solo time) being highlights. I liked the show, but I could have liked it a lot more without the issues.

Results

AJ Styles b. Gran Metalik – Calf Crusher

King Corbin b. Drew Gulak – End of Days

Big E. b. The Miz – Stretch Muffler

Naomi b. Lacey Evans – Backslide

Bayley b. Nikki Cross – Bulldog driver

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Main Event
Date: July 23, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: MVP, Tom Phillips

It’s time for the weekly recap show of all of the events that don’t have the kind of audience to warrant a recap in the first place. WWE at least has Summerslam to set up in the next few weeks, but after that I’m not sure what they are going to be able to do. Hopefully things can be fine enough for an hour here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Bianca Belair vs. Jessi Kamea

Belair powers her into the corner without much effort to start and tells Jessi to bring it on. A quick flip over Jessi sets up a running shoulder to put her down and we hit the cravate. Jessi’s dropkick doesn’t have much effect so Belair fires off shoulders in the corner. There’s a splash to the back but Jessi drives her into the corner. That’s fine with Belair, who sends her into the corner again and hits the KOD for the pin at 4:31.

Rating: D+. What were you expecting from this one? They did their thing for a few minutes and Belair won with her finisher. That’s all you’re going to get out of a match like this and Belair continues to be way too talented for this show. Jessi has been around a few times now and this is about as far as she has gotten so far. I can’t say I’m surprised.

We get some quick promos from AJ Styles and Matt Riddle before their Intercontinental Title match.

From Smackdown.

Intercontinental Title: Matt Riddle vs. AJ Styles

Styles is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Riddle blocks an early Irish whip attempt and hits the rolling gutwrench suplexes to put AJ on the floor. A running knee puts AJ down again so he rips off the announcers’ table, only to get kicked in the head. We take a break and come back with AJ still in trouble as commentary thinks he’s off his game tonight.

AJ manages a belly to back faceplant to drop Riddle though and it’s time for the forearms in the corner. Some shots to the leg have Riddle in trouble and we hit the chinlock. Riddle powers up and drives him into the corner, setting up the running backsplash. The Bro To Sleep into the Final Flash connects for two and we take another break.

Back again with AJ hitting a clothesline out of the corner but Riddle strikes away without much trouble. Riddle charges into a superkick though but AJ can’t hit the Styles Clash. Instead Riddle hits a ripcord knee to the face, only to miss the Floating Bro. A brainbuster gives AJ two but he has to fight out of the Bro Derek. They strike it out with AJ reversing a Pele into the Calf Crusher. Riddle reverses that into a Bromission attempt but can’t quite get it on. Instead, AJ reverses into a cradle for the clean pin at 18:07.

Rating: B. I’m not wild on the 50/50 booking, though losing a clean fall to AJ Styles is far from some career killer. Riddle has gotten a good start to his run on Smackdown, but I’m worried about the double hit of losing here and then having to feud with Corbin for weeks on end. I know he had frostbite on his feet, but that isn’t the kind of heat he needs.

Post match AJ shakes Riddle’s hand but here’s Corbin from behind to beat Riddle down.

We look at Bayley trying to cheat Asuka out of the Raw Women’s Title at Extreme Rules.

From Raw.

Here are Bayley and Sasha Banks for a chat. Banks says she has this and explains her version of what happened last night. Asuka intentionally tried to blind the referee with the mist and Bayley just borrowed his shirt. Bayley did it because she’s a role model and now they have all the gold. A celebratory dance breaks out but here are Asuka and Kairi Sane.

Sasha was not ready for Asuka last night and the title is still hers. Banks says come get it so here they come. Hold on though as Stephanie McMahon pops up on screen to say Banks isn’t the Raw Women’s Champion. The title is on the line next week and Sasha can lose via pinfall, submission, countout, DQ, or with Bayley interfering. I’m assuming that counts for Asuka as well, but since Stephanie didn’t say it, it isn’t gospel.

Bayley vs. Kairi Sane

Non-title. Sane slugs away to start but Bayley comes back with some shots of her own. That earns her a hip attack to the floor, only to have Bayley come back in and stomp away in the corner. The chinlock doesn’t last long on Sane so Bayley snaps off a suplex for two. Sane drapes her on the top rope though and hits a top rope double stomp to the back, sending Bayley outside in a heap.

We take a break and come back with Bayley unloading in the corner. This is so fascinating that we cut to the back for an interview with Shayna Baszler, who says her interest in the match is like a shark seeing prey. Back to full screen with Sane reversing a suplex into a DDT for a breather. The Sliding D connects but Bayley grabs an armbar over the ropes in the corner.

Sane sweeps the leg and goes up top for an Alberto double stomp into a near fall. The spinning backfist into the Interceptor drops Bayley again but the Insane Elbow misses. Another Interceptor is cut off with a knee to the face. Bayley drops her with a suplex but misses her own top rope elbow. The Bayley to Belly is loaded up instead but Sane reverses into a rollup for the pin at 15:38.

Rating: B-. Given all of the rumors of Sane leaving WWE soon, this is quite the surprising result. That being said, it can also offer to shake things up a bit. I can’t imagine Sane taking the title from Bayley or anything like that, but it is a good idea to give Bayley something to do while they figure out her next big challenger. Good match too, with the surprise ending helping things.

Video on Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler from Extreme Rules.

Riddick Moss vs. Humberto Carrillo

Moss powers him around to start and then cranks on Carrillo’s arm. A headlock gets Carrillo out of trouble for a bit so Moss blasts him with a shoulder. Back up and Carrillo hits a running dropkick to send Moss outside, only to have the suicide dive countered with a drive into the barricade.

We take a break and come back with Moss hitting a backbreaker into a fall away slam. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Carrillo fights up for an enziguri. A standing moonsault sets up a crossbody for two on Moss. Carrillo hits a sunset flip for two more but Moss is right back with the neckbreaker for the pin at 9:37.

Rating: C-. Main Event continues to be one of the most confusing shows I can remember. Carrillo is still part of a fairly big story on Raw but here he is losing to Riddick Moss (again) on Main Event. That doesn’t even make bad sense, and it is another good example of how much of a mess WWE is these days.

We look back at Eye For An Eye.

Videos on Big Show and Randy Orton’s careers.

From Raw.

Big Show vs. Randy Orton

Unsanctioned so anything goes. Show knocks him into the corner in a hurry and hammers away at the arm. The spear sends Orton outside but cue Angel Garza and Andrade to jump Show. They whip him into the steps but the Viking Raiders run out to break up the Punt attempt as we take a break. Back with an unset table in the ring and Orton kicking at the leg. Show hits a chokeslam for two but the threat of the KO Punch sends Orton outside.

Back in and Show knocks him down again, this time putting Orton on the table. A Vader Bomb only hits table though, allowing Orton to hit the RKO for two. Orton isn’t happy, so he blasts Show in the back with some chair shots, leaving the referee to discard the pieces of the broken table. Another chair shot to the back sets up a top rope hanging DDT and a second RKO finishes Show at 13:45.

Rating: C. That’s all you could have expected it to be and that’s fine. Orton got in there and wrecked Show, which was exactly what he should have done. Show is expendable and Orton is probably about to headline Summerslam. What more can you expect from a match that was designed to accomplish one single goal?

Orton Punts Show to wrap things up.

Overall Rating: D+. WWE is just such a mess right now and I don’t see that changing anytime soon. That’s a major problem and Main Event is a good illustration of the whole thing. The original matches either aren’t good or don’t jive with the main roster booking (If Moss can beat Carrillo, why can’t he get on Raw?) and the recaps just show you how bad things are at the moment. Run of the mill Main Event here, which doesn’t say much.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: July 24, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

We’re finally done with Extreme Rules and less than a month away from Summerslam. That means it’s time to start getting ready for one of the bigger shows of the year, but first we need to have a bar fight between Sheamus and Jeff Hardy, as one of the more questionable feuds of the year continues. Let’s get to it.

Here is Extreme Rules if you need a recap.

Jeff Hardy says he is an alcoholic and is ready to face Sheamus in his newfound enemy: a bar.

Sheamus is ready to give Jeff a headache, but it’s from a Brogue kick instead of a hangover.

JBL knows what a bar fight is like and says the emotions are running higher than the blood alcohol content in an APA poker game. Points for actually managing to make this even more cringe worthy.

Here are Bayley and Sasha Banks to gloat. Sasha talks about what it means to be great but the definition needs to be changed to the two of them. After Bayley yells at some fans, Banks declares an end to the Women’s Revolution. It started with them and it’s ending with them, because they are starting a new era. No matter how hard you try, you’ll never be them, but here are Nikki Cross and Alexa Bliss to interrupt.

Cross rants about how sick she is of the two of them so Bayley asks if she took her rabies medicine. Even Bliss thinks it’s too much right now but Cross wants a Women’s Title shot tonight. Bayley says fine, but Cross has to face Bliss, with the winner getting the title shot next week. Cross says they have to do this and shoves Bliss down, although not out of anger.

Nikki Cross vs. Alexa Bliss

The winner gets a shot at Bayley next week so Bayley and Banks are on commentary. Cross comes in with taped ribs thanks to the ring shot on Sunday, which Banks turns into a plug for WWE Shop. Bliss gets shoved down to start but Cross can’t hit a tornado DDT. They get annoyed at each other, even as Bliss can’t hit her own DDT. Cross gets more fired up and forearms away, setting up a bulldog for two.

Bliss dropkicks her tot he floor but misses the charge and gets caught in the ring skirt. A kick to the face gets Bliss out of trouble, so Bayley and Banks shout “GET HER! GET HER!” That earns them a double knockdown and we take a break. Back with Bliss dropkicking her out to the floor as Cole and Graves laugh at the knockdown before the commercial. Bayley challenges Cole for Summerslam as Bliss kicks away at the bad ribs and drives them into the barricade to put Cross down outside.

Back in and some knees to the ribs give Bliss two before she cranks on the arm with a knee in the ribs. It’s off to a seated abdominal stretch so Cole can list off all of Bliss’ accomplishments. They really need to stop doing that as so many people have won so many titles that they lose all meaning every time you hear them.

Cross fights up but the tornado DDT is countered into a sunset bomb for two. Back up and Cross grabs a Regal Cutter for two more, followed by a reverse DDT for the same. Cross misses the high crossbody though and the ribs are banged up again. The referee goes to check on her so Cross insists she can keep going, which means a small package to finish Bliss at 14:55.

Rating: C. This was good enough and they’re planting the seeds for a Bliss/Cross split. That’s possibly their backdoor out of next week, though I’m not sure where that leaves Bayley for Summerslam. The ribs stuff was good here though, and Bayley and Banks are really entertaining on commentary, as you can tell how well they get along. It’s certainly better than Nikki screaming every chance she gets.

Post break Nikki is excited when a dejected Bliss comes in to congratulate her. Bliss says it’s time to focus on becoming the new Women’s Champion next week.

It’s time for the Firefly Fun House, which starts with a package on the Swamp Fight. Bray, standing next to the Fiend lantern, says that was fun because Braun Strowman came back home. Some of you are probably worried that Braun is now trapped in the swamp, but don’t worry, because it has been certified organic. The lantern starts talking to him but Bray says its job is done for now. No he can’t let the lantern out again, because he had his chance. Now it’s his turn, because he has been unleashed. We cut to the Fiend and that’s it.

We look back at AJ Styles vs. Matt Riddle from last week.

Matt Riddle vs. Tony Nese

Riddle goes straight to the rolling gutwrench suplexes into the Broton for one. Nese knocks him down and hits a Lionsault for two, followed by a bodyscissors to keep Riddle in trouble. Back up and Nese has to knee his way out of the Bro Derek, meaning Riddle settles for a t-bone suplex. Now the Bro Derek can connect for the pin at 2:03. Nice back on track win for Riddle.

Post match Riddle calls out King Corbin to fight him right now. Cue Corbin to say the request is denied because Riddle doesn’t belong in the kingdom. Riddle still has the new car smell but after that wears off, he’s just a frat boy who looks like he just rolled out of bed. That’s why Corbin has put out a king’s ransom on his head. Riddle says Corbin has it all wrong because Corbin is the next guest on the Bro Show. Nese tries to jump Riddle and gets kicked in the head.

Miz and John Morrison try to think of hashtags to get themselves some extra attention, with Morrison’s getting rather long.

JBL talks about what a bar fight means and talks about Jeff Hardy’s career. Jeff wins tonight.

Here are Miz and Morrison for MizTV. They have been talking with a team of trend forecasters to find out what is going to trend in the future. That’s why Morrison’s jacket has a MoreMorrison hashtag sign in his shirt. He’ll be sick if that doesn’t trend. How sick you ask? Four Seth Rollins vomiting sick. With that out of the way, here is Naomi as their guest. Last week she may have lost, but Naomideservesbetter was trending after her match. Naomi thanks the fans for having her back, with Miz talking about how she went viral for returning at the Royal Rumble this year too. Miz: “But you didn’t win that match either.”

Why aren’t people talking about Lacey Evans? Naomi says the two of them are making her sick. Miz and Morrison: “How sick?” That would be five Seth Rollins vomiting sick, which Miz warns will prevent her from trending. Naomi talks about everything she puts in the ring every time and that’s why the fans are behind her.

Miz didn’t expect this kind of a confrontation, so here’s Lacey Evans as a surprise guest. Lacey thinks Naomi’s hashtag was trending out of pity and calls her washed up. Naomi shoves Lacey as she does her lipstick, meaning the fight is on with Lacey bailing. I can go with Naomi getting a push, but because of karaoke, makeup and hashtags?

We look at Cesaro and Shinsuke Nakamura winning the Tag Team Titles on Sunday.

Big E. is outside of the trainer’s room when Kofi Kingston comes out. He’s holding his ribs and limping because there is some bad news: he is going to be out about six weeks. Big E. promises they will get the Tag Team Titles back but Kofi wants Big E. to go do something on his own while the rest of the team is on the shelf. Kofi: “I put your meat on my meat man.” They hug and Big E. seems touched.

Gran Metalik vs. Lince Dorado vs. Shorty G. vs. Drew Gulak

One fall to a finish and the winner gets an Intercontinental Title shot against AJ Styles (on commentary). Gable and Gulak are sent outside in a hurry but the Lucha House Party fight doesn’t break out as Gulak breaks things up. Metalik hurricanranas Gulak to the floor before dodging a German suplex attempt from Gable. The rope walk dropkick gets two on gable with Gulak making a save. Dorado comes in and hammers away in Gulak in the corner as AJ says he wants to face the one who gets beaten up the worst. AJ: “It just makes sense right?”

Dorado suicide dives onto Gulak and Gable sends Metalik outside. A huge Gable moonsault wipes out everyone and we take a break. Back with Gable and Gulak going into a pinfall reversal sequence for two each. Metalik comes back in and gets double teamed down but Gulak and Gable argue over who gets to stomp. The arguing lets Metalik hit a handspring elbow to take both of them down and it’s Dorado coming back in to chop away.

Metalik breaks up Dorado’s cover though and the argument is on, only to have Gable jump Metalik with a suplex. There’s one for Dorado as well and Gable is fired up. Gulak takes a third and a hard belly to back suplex gets two on Metalik. Back up and Gable gets caught in the Gulock but he climbs the ropes to reverse into an ankle lock. The grapevine makes it even worse but Dorado makes the save with a top rope splash for two. Dorado goes up again, earning himself a crotching from Gulak. Gable takes them both down though and Metalik walks the ropes for the top rope elbow and the pin on Gable at 11:47.

Rating: C+. They kept the action going here and that’s the best thing they could have done. That being said, they picked Metalik to get the title shot? Actually…..why not? One of the biggest criticisms about WWE is they can be predictable so Metalik winning here is quite the twist. He won’t win the title or anything, but points for trying something new.

Post match AJ gets in the ring and slaps Metalik in the face, earning himself a tornado DDT. Metalik holds up the title.

Video on Otis and Mandy Rose’s romance.

Shinsuke Nakamura and Cesaro are happy with their titles but they are sad about not putting Big E. through a table. It would have made a bigger splat you see. Even with Kofi being out of action, it isn’t Big E.’s time. They salute and promise to make all of the Smackdown teams go splat.

Long video on Jeff Hardy vs. Sheamus.

Next week: AJ Styles defends against Gran Metalik and Nikki Cross gets another shot at Alexa Bliss.

Sheamus vs. Jeff Hardy

They’re in a local bar and Sheamus arrives first, meaning he can order a drink. Jeff arrives and asks for a cup as he sits down next to Sheamus. His brother had to delete his career and Jeff had to save his own. Rehab made him better but Sheamus says no one cares about Jeff anymore. Jeff asks if Sheamus is still the bar and says he is connected to everything. Like the window, the TV and this bar. Sheamus: “I’m the bar!” Sheamus is ready to fight so Sheamus throws a drink in his face and it’s on.

That means Sheamus gets the better of it in a hurry and hits the ten forearms over the bar. Sheamus wants a top shelf drink but the distraction lets Jeff run down the bar and dive onto him. There’s a whip into some barrels and Jeff steals the basketballs from a machine and pelts Sheamus with them. They fight into the back with Jeff having a barrel knocked out of his hands. Sheamus sends him into some walls and they head into the bathroom, with Jeff’s face going into a urinal.

Jeff one ups him by throwing Sheamus into a stall and crawling out, leaving Sheamus to scream about Hardy. Sheamus goes looking for him but gets laddered in the chest. Jeff dives off the bar again but gets rammed into the wall for his efforts. Now it’s Jeff being thrown over a set of drums and we take a break. Back with Sheamus Brogue kicking a drum and being sent into a table. The Twisting Stunner rocks Sheamus and Jeff grabs the ladder.

The bartender, the same one from the toast, jumps Jeff from behind though, earning himself a powerbomb through a table. Sheamus breaks a chair over Hardy’s back, puts his hat over Jeff’s face, and says sweet dreams. Sheamus has a drink and calls over the referee, but now Jeff’s face is painted and his eyeballs have some kind of a film over them. He gets up and hits Sheamus with a glass before climbing the ladder. The Swanton hits Sheamus for the pin at 13:14.

Rating: C. It was a good enough brawl but good grief enough with the supernatural stuff. Hardy going into some trance and suddenly having paint on his face took me way out of this as they were having a good and almost realistic fight for a long time. But then oh wait never mind because we need to tell some story or have Jeff be some weird creature. He can’t just fight up because he wants to prove people wrong and come back against the odds for the win. No no, the solution is to be smart instead, because that hasn’t gotten WWE in trouble lately whatsoever.

Overall Rating: C. Your individual taste may vary here as they seem to have a plan for Summerslam (that’s good) but some of the choices are a little out there (that’s usually bad). The action was good enough and the main event felt like a step forward for Hardy, but dang I don’t need to see anything cinematic for a LONG time to come. They do seem to be going in a few fresh directions though and right now, that is a good idea. Granted baseball’s big return is going to ravage this in the ratings anyway, but points for planting some seeds.

Results

Nikki Cross b. Alexa Bliss – Small package

Matt Riddle b. Tony Nese – Bro Derek

Gran Metalik b. Lince Dorado, Shorty G. and Drew Gulak – Rope walk elbow to Shorty G.

Jeff Hardy b. Sheamus – Swanton off a ladder

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Ernest P. Worrell Memorial
Date: March 12, 2005
Location: Frank & Son Collectible Show, City of Industry, California
Commentators: Excalibur, Disco Machine

When you do this for the better part of ten years, you think you’ll never find something new to say. Then you start looking through PWG show names and realize you have no idea what you’re talking about. Worrell was a character played by Jim Varney who appeared in a bunch of movies with his name in the title. He died five years before this show took place and that is the last bit of a connection that he has with anything on this show. Let’s get to it.

I have only seen a handful of PWG shows ever so I have no idea what is going on here storyline or character wise. Please bear with me if I miss some major details.

Excalibur (yes of AEW, in case you thought it was another Excalibur) is in the ring with I believe his SBS (not sure what that stands for) stablemate Super Dragon and talks about how great it is to be back here. Apparently Disco Machine has been promoted to interim Commissioner of PWG and the last time Excalibur was here, Machine suspended him for one month without pay. That’s not good because it took money from Excalibur, while also taking away his time in front of this audience.

Disco Machine needs to get out here RIGHT NOW and decide if he’s the commissioner or part of SBS. Super Dragon jumps him from behind but here’s Disco Machine to make the save. Dancing ensues and Excalibur thanks him before Disco says they have a lot of business to take care of in PWG. Cue Hook Bomberry and Top Gun Talwar (neither are named here as there is no commentary) with Talwar shouting a lot. Talwar wants Disco Machine to stop being a boss and be a wrestler again, so all four shake hands and it’s time for an eight man tag.

Ronin/Ballard Brothers/Charles Mercury vs. Excalibur/Disco Machine/Hook Bomberry/Top Gun Talwar

We have commentary (on the second audio channel for some reason) as Disco strikes away at Mercury to start with a backslide getting two. Disco goes to the armbar as commentary talks about Mercury’s issues with credit cards (commentary isn’t exactly the highest quality here, as it seems more like they were told to do it and aren’t quite putting in their best effort). Mercury counters a springboard armdrag into a cross armbreaker but Disco is out in a hurry.

They both miss dropkicks and it’s off to Bomberry vs. Shane Ballard (in his hockey jersey ala his brother). As we hear about Shane enjoying being verbally abused by his romantic partners due to childhood bullying issues, Bomberry shoulders him down and follows with a bad dropkick. A basement version to the side of the head gets two on Shane. Talwar and Shannon come in and it’s a cheap shot from Ronin to annoy Talwar in a hurry. Everything breaks down and it’s a quadruple bite (fingers and boots) to Shannon. I’m not sure what good it does to bite someone’s boot but Excalibur never struck me as all that bright.

Talwar and Shannon trade shoulders for one each, followed by exchanges of hiptosses and armdrags until Talwar misses another armdrag. They roll around for some quick rollups each and they’re so dizzy that they can’t stand up. Talwar collapses onto Shannon’s crotch so it’s off to Excalibur vs. Ronin. One of the fans doesn’t like Excalibur so we stop for him to be upset.

Excalibur hits a dropkick and running shoulder, followed by some jumping knees to the chest. A forearm to the face puts Excalibur down though and the Brothers come in for a double Russian legsweep. As commentary debates the merits of going to Russia, Ronin splashes Excalibur in the corner and Mercury clears the good guys off the apron. Shannon charges into a boot in the corner but comes back with a DDT for two. Excalibur gets in a big boot and a cubic zirconium cutter for the hot tag off to Disco as everything breaks down.

The good guys clear the ring and load up a series of dives, with Disco and Excalibur missing, Bomberry getting kicked out of the air, and Talwar landing on the apron. Call that a rather mixed bag I guess. Mercury and Bomberry chop it out at ringside with Mercury sending him face first into a chair. Back in and Ronin’s powerslam is countered into a reverse DDT from Talwar for two with Mercury making a save. A DDT gets two on Talwar with Excalibur making a diving save. We hit the parade of secondary finishers for some near falls and Talwar turns on Disco, setting up a Whirling Dervish from Shane for the pin at 13:54.

Rating: C-. This could have been a lot worse, though it still wasn’t exactly must see. They had a good amount of action, but it is rather clear that these guys don’t have the most extensive training outside of the fast paced indy style. I get why that kind of wrestling is popular, but the lack of almost anything else can get a little tiresome. Odds are that is going to be the case throughout the show, though maybe some of the others can be a little more seasoned.

Post match we’re clipped (doesn’t seem long) to Bomberry and Talwar beating down Disco and Excalibur. Talwar grabs the mic and shouts about stealing some titles….and injecting them into himself? Disco tries to fight back but the numbers get the better of him. Excalibur gets the same treatment, though points for at least trying. Disco gets up again and fights Talwar to the back.

Ricky Reyes vs. Chris Sabin

Reyes was part of the Havana Pitbulls in ROH and I’m pretty sure you know Sabin, who is making his company debut. They fight over wrist control to start and trade some flippy escapes. Excalibur dubs Reyes as the Tito Santana of PWG, which isn’t something I’m going to take lightly. Reyes grabs a headlock takeover as commentary talks about how Reyes can scout Sabin because Sabin is a regular on Impact. Fair point actually.

Sabin spins out of a double legsweep and gets two off a rollup, sending the fans into quite the applause over a standoff. Sabin forearms away in the corner and snaps off a hurricanrana to send Reyes outside. Naturally that means a suicide dive (indy show requirement) for two back inside but Reyes gets in a poke to the eye. A backbreaker gives Reyes two and he drops a knee to the chest. There’s an elbow to the face for two more and Reyes drops Sabin again for daring a sunset flip.

A loud kick to the back gets another near fall and it’s time to yell at the referee. Sabin uses the breather to come back with an elbow to the face as Excalibur talks about his love life declining. As a result, Sabin gave him some tips from the Kama Sutra. You can tell how professional this stuff is here people. Sabin comes off the top with a big diving DDT for his own two but the Cradle Shock is broken up.

Reyes grabs a bridging northern lights suplex for another near fall and they’re both down. Sabin manages an enziguri into a running diving powerbomb for a rather close two. A tornado DDT plants Sabin to give Reyes another near fall and it’s time for more kicks. Sabin shrugs them off and hits the Cradle Shock for the quick pin at 9:46.

Rating: C. I liked this one a bit more than the opener as it was a more grounded match that let them set things up a lot better. Granted the lack of six more wrestlers and an angle might have had something to do with that. Sabin is always worth a glance and Reyes has done some rather decent stuff in his own right so I’m not surprised that they had a nice match here.

Los Luchas vs. Human Tornado/Scorpio Sky

Tornado, with Dino Winwood, is replacing Sky’s regular partner Quicksilver, as the team is having some issues. Los Luchas (Zokre and Phoenix Star) have been around for the better part of ever. Zokre and Sky start things off as Excalibur talks about how he has been accused of being racist against Mexicans. With that out of the way, they trade armdrags and it’s off to Star for a dropkick to put Sky on the floor. Tornado comes in and gets springboard armdragged to the floor.

Zokre comes in for some miscommunication, followed by a headscissors. Sky is back in to pull Star out of the air into a Fujiwara armbar. Zokre kneebars Tornado at the same time but both holds are released. Sky sends Zokre outside and hits a running knee for two on Star. It’s Star being taken into the corner for a hiptoss backbreaker from Tornado. The chinlock (not a headlock Excalibur) goes on before it’s back to Sky for two off a dropkick. Star gets in a kick to the head though and it’s back to Zokre to pick up the pace.

A jumping knee to the chest drops Sky but Tornado avoids a rolling splash in the corner. Everything breaks down and Star does a handstand in the corner, leaving Sky and Tornado a little confused. Tornado walks over and pokes Star in the eye though, sending him down into a low blow on Zokre. Points for keeping it simple. Sky backbreakers Star and we hit the dancing for a bit. Zokre is back up with a middle rope double Blockbuster and everyone is down.

A surfboard to Tornado sets up a reverse Angle Slam from Star for two. Star spears Sky down for two more with Tornado making the save and sending Zokre outside. We settle back down to Tornado vs. Star, the latter of whom elbows the heck out of Tornado. A low blow has no effect on Tornado (it’s a thing with him) as everything breaks down again. Zokre breaks up Sky’s springboard and Star takes him out with a big dive.

Tornado takes them both down with a big flip dive and Zokre teases his own but bounces off the ropes instead. That leaves Sky to hit him with a twisting backbreaker, followed by a big dive of his own. Sky misses a frog splash though and everyone is back in. The Luchas tease stereo springboards but Zokre drops to the apron instead, leaving Star to hit a springboard flipping legdrop on Sky instead. Tornado breaks up Zokre’s dive but gets sent outside. That leaves the Luchas to hit a top rope Lionsault/springboard Swanton to finish Sky at 11:52.

Rating: C. That ending was rather sloppy and they didn’t exactly hide what happened. It was a fine enough spotfest match other than that but nothing that hasn’t been done better. Sky wasn’t standing out as much as he would later, though this wasn’t the kind of place for him to stand out. Fine enough match, but nothing that hasn’t been done better elsewhere.

Christopher Daniels vs. AJ Styles vs. El Generico vs. Kevin Steen

One fall to a finish for the #1 contendership for the World Title later tonight (the schedule had to be changed as original #1 contender Tony Stradlin was signed by WWE, where he never got out of developmental). Steen is better known as Kevin Owens and Generico is someone who knows Sami Zayn. Daniels gets a heck of a reception during the Big Match Intros and Styles’ isn’t that far behind. The MR. WRESTLING (Steen) chants start up after the bell as the fans are rather fickle here.

Steen (who is SKINNY here, as well as incredibly young) and Generico start things off and we actually have tags in a bit of a surprise. After a minute and a half of standing around, Steen takes Generico down with a front facelock. That’s reversed into a Fujiwara armbar as Excalibur talks about how he doesn’t like Generico that much. Steen switches to a headlock as Excalibur talks about loving astronomy and cooking, which somehow ties into Generico speaking French and Spanish but not English.

Generico armdrags Steen into the corner and it’s off to Daniels vs. Styles. That sends Daniels straight to the floor because he doesn’t want Styles just yet. So we can keep things moving, Styles tags Generico, who armdrags Daniels into an armbar. That lets Excalibur talk about NBA players using armdrags and the armbarring continues. Daniels chops his way out as Excalibur moves on to insulting all of Mexico, plus questioning how a luchador can be so pale.

Generico gets over to Styles for another tag so Daniels brings Steen back in. Styles slaps Steen in the face for offering a handshake (jerk) and headlocks him over. Now commentary has moved on to discussing Canadian television as Steen fights up, only to get caught in some armdrags. Back up and it’s off to Generico, who gets pulled into the corner so Daniels can keep him in trouble. Daniels even decks Steen, because Daniels isn’t that nice. It’s back to Steen for two off a snap suplex but Generico grabs a bridging northern lights suplex for two of his own.

Steen takes Generico down again and hands it back to AJ for a kick to the face/mask area. Generico blocks a suplex attempt so AJ goes with the always great drop down into the dropkick for two more. AJ goes Nexus with a McGillicutter but Daniels tags himself in and gets the two count. We hit the chinlock with a knee in the back as Excalibur wraps up a two minute story about sending his dad a picture of AJ’s dropkick. Daniels drags Generico over to the corner so Steen tags himself in and unloads on Daniels to even the score from earlier. Steen grabs a chinlock with a knee in the back as the fans chant for Daniels again.

The regular chinlock goes on for a bit until Daniels elbows his way to freedom. A double clothesline drops both of them and it’s Steen bringing in AJ, with Generico nowhere to be seen. AJ unloads on Daniels with clotheslines and a spinwheel kick, followed by a neckbreaker for two. Daniels is back with a Blue Thunder Bomb for two of his own but the moonsault out of the corner into the reverse DDT puts Daniels down again.

Steen comes in for the save and gets belly to back faceplanted for two more. Daniels is back in with an Iconoclasm for two on Styles with Steen making the save this time as the tagging has been dropped. AJ sends Daniels to the floor and hits a big dive as Generico comes back in. Steen teases his own dive….and then covers Generico for the pin and the title shot at 21:19.

Rating: B. This was the first match that felt like a big deal and I can give you four guesses why that was the case. As you might have expected, AJ feels like the biggest and most polished star of the match, though Daniels wasn’t far behind. Good match here though and Steen doing the logical thing to take the pin is very fitting for him, even back then.

Next up is the Tag Team Title match but the champs, Arrogance (Scott Lost/Chris Bosh) have something to say. Before we can get to that though, the fans tell Kazarian that he’s the coolest. Kazarian is ready to introduce his mystery partner but Lost needs to announce that ROBOCOP will be here in two weeks (at the venue, not a PWG show). Bosh: “I LOVE ROBOCOP!”

Hold on though as Bosh needs to go to the floor and insult all of the different races in the crowd (seriously), including saying “and we also have our white people!”. Lost gets back in the ring and says Kazarian’s real name is…..Snake Duncan? Apparently he’s going to WWE and they’ll join him there someday. Kazarian says he knows Arrogance likes movie references, so Kazarian references Bosh’s mother having, ahem, relations with various races in HER movies. With that, it’s time to meet Kazarian’s partner.

Tag Team Titles: Arrogance vs. Frankie Kazarian/Joey Ryan

Kazarian and Ryan, the latter dubbed the Homeless Vagabond, are challenging with Ryan making a big return. Before we’re ready to go, Bosh gets in an argument with a mentally challenged fan in the crowd, allowing Excalibur to make fat jokes about Ryan. Bosh steals a large fan’s chair (off camera) as we await the opening bell. Arrogance can’t decide who starts and the referee is getting fed up of this, so commentary makes fun of El Generico.

It’s a brawl to start with Lost spearing Bosh by mistake. Lost gets sent into Bosh in the corner and Kazarian adds a corner dropkick for a bonus. The slingshot dive hits Lost as Ryan seems content to stand on the apron and applaud. Ryan comes in and Lost (Ryan’s former partner) bails in a hurry so Ryan hurricanranas Bosh instead. Bosh gets chopped over and over in the corner and Kazarian’s running neckbreaker gets two.

A missed charge in the corner lets Bosh stomp Kazarian down and Lost comes in to punch Kazarian in the face (as per Bosh’s instructions). Lost’s leg lariat gets two (Bosh: “Good s***.”) and Bosh comes back in, mocks Kazarian’s springboards, and forearms him in the back. A clothesline drives Kazarian’s back onto Lost’s raised knees for no cover, as it’s time to choke on the rope instead. Some loud laughter sets up another forearm to the back, followed by a Tarantula from Bosh.

Lost gets in a rather blatant low blow, as DQ’s apparently don’t count around here. A Stinger Splash (or close to one) connects for Bosh but Kazarian gets in a spinning sunset bomb to get a much needed breather. Ryan comes in and low blows Bosh’s top rope dive out of the air but Lost runs away from the Ryan threat. Lost tries a cheap shot to no effect and it’s Ryan cleaning house on both champs. A slam puts Lost onto Bosh and Kazarian hits a top rope legdrop onto both of them.

It’s back to Kazarian, as Ryan is fine with watching him fight both champs at once. I’m starting to think he’s not the best partner. A Stunner stuns Kazarian into a Rock Bottom into a backbreaker for two. Kazarian is back up with a twisting DDT/swinging Downward Spiral, allowing the tag off to Ryan. Some rolling German suplexes put Bosh down and a fisherman’s suplex gets two. Lost kicks Ryan off the top but Kazarian does the same to Bosh, with the latter falling out to the floor.

Lost dropkicks Kazarian but grabs his knee and falls out to the floor with the referee checking on him. Ryan uses the distraction to grab a chair, which Kazarian takes away in a hurry. Bosh knocks them into each other and BLASTS Ryan in the head with said chair. Since Ryan is who he is, he flicks his head up to check where everything is (of course) and Bosh comes in to get the easy pin to retain at 13:15.

Rating: C+. Ryan looking up at the end made me laugh quite a bit because even when he’s just a guy in tights, he has to do something to take away the realism. The match was fine enough, but it wasn’t anything that hasn’t been done better. Maybe knowing and seeing more of the backstory would help, but Ryan was just a guy in tights here, which I’ll take over the more famous persona. Just….stop doing stupid stuff.

Post match Kazarian and some trainers check on Ryan. The fans give Ryan an ovation….and he kicks Kazarian low. Excalibur tries to come in and gets shoved away, so here’s Arrogance to stomp on Kazarian as well. A failed save attempt earns Excalibur his own beating and Ryan grabs the mic. Ryan says Kazarian expects him to be the good guy, and where did that get him? He’s been on his couch eating generic knockoff Cheetos for the last month.

Trying to please the people does him no good because Kazarian cost him a chance to become a champion. The worst thing the people did was like him more than they liked Scott Lost. That caused the problems between Ryan and Lost, who is Ryan’s best friend. The fans don’t think much of the best friend deal and it’s even worse when Ryan apologizes to Lost. Ryan and Lost hug but Kazarian runs back in to chase them off. Not a bad post match angle.

PWG World Title: Super Dragon vs. Kevin Steen

Steen is challenging and jumps Dragon from behind during the entrances. Dragon’s robe is thrown down and Steen tosses him into the chairs. They get inside with Steen hitting a spinwheel kick but it’s too early for the package piledriver. Super Dragon can’t hit a curb stomp but can get a figure four necklock to slow Steen down. A basement dropkick gives Dragon two and some Kawada kicks make it worse.

Dragon grabs a full nelson with his legs, meaning some kicks to the back of the head can rock Steen again. A snapmare gets one on Steen (probably because it was a snapmare) and he grabs the rope to block a Psycho Driver (whatever that is). Dragon sends him outside but misses a flipping suicide dive for a NASTY crash (with the good visual of the fans spreading away). Steen is glad to capitalize on Dragon’s banged up knee but he needs to yell at a fan too.

More yelling at another fan lets Dragon remember what planet he’s on before Steen throws him back in. A missile dropkick gets two on Dragon and Steen puts on his own leg full nelson with kicks to the head. Steen slams him down but stops to yell at the fans again. That means a rather delayed two, followed by a neckbreaker onto the knee for the same. We hit the choking, as Steen is looking great as the cocky heel here. A flipping legdrop gives Steen two more as Excalibur talks about going to a Detroit Pistons game and knee braces called can openers.

Dragon misses a rolling kick into the corner and bangs up the knee all over again. Steen takes too much time AGAIN though and now the rolling kick knocks him out to the floor. The running flip dive connects this time and they’re both down on the floor. Back in and Dragon hits a jumping stomp to the ribs, setting up the curb stomp. The fans want another one but Steen reverses into a small package for two. Another curb stomp gives Dragon two and a top rope backsplash gets the same.

Dragon misses a Cannonball though and Steen hits a great looking moonsault for his own near fall. Excalibur chokes on some water as the dueling chants begin. Steen grabs a slingshot Downward Spiral for a very close two, meaning it’s time for the package piledriver. A quick hurricanrana into a clothesline gives Dragon his own two and they’re both down again.

It’s Dragon up first to miss a top rope stomp, allowing Steen to grab a fisherman’s buster for the next near fall. Steen hits his own curb stomp and a heck of a package piledriver gets two more. That’s the kickout that lets you know Steen isn’t winning, even as Dragon rolls outside. Back in and Steen tries the Psycho Driver (it starts with a torture rack) but Dragon slips out and grabs his own package piledriver to retain at 18:16.

Rating: B. The match was good action with some solid near falls, but at the same time there was very little feeling that Steen was going to win the title. Once Dragon kicked out of the package piledriver, there was no chance whatsoever and it showed badly. Still though, good main event indeed with Steen as a great heel, even though it’s weird seeing a heel coming in at a disadvantage after wrestling a long match earlier tonight.

We’re off the air less than fifteen seconds after the bell and with Excalibur in mid-sentence.

Before we wrap things up, the DVD also includes a set of promos from after (or maybe during) the show.

Excalibur and Disco Machine are furious about their loss but they have fixed their burned bridges. Now Top Gun Talwar and Hook Bomberry have burned their own bridges. Ronin comes in and says they were having a good match and shakes Excalibur’s hand. Excalibur talks about how that is the kind of sportsmanship you want in a professional wrestler. Not anabolic steroids like in Talwar and Bomberry. That’s more fire than I’ve ever heard from Excalibur and it wasn’t bad.

Chris Sabin talks about coming to California and he’s made a name for himself everywhere else. Tonight, he showed why he’s better than everyone else, but that was just step one.

Talwar and Bomberry want to go to Tijuana, kill a hooker, and do cocaine off of her body. Steroids are discussed and apparently Talwar has absorbed title belts. This place is weird. Talwar: “I’m on steroids! I do cocaine! I f*** hookers!”

Joey Ryan talks about how he used to come here every month and wrestle but his fans stole everything from him. They always wanted him to be a nice guy but nice guys finish last. Where did any of that get him? It got him on the shelf for six months.

Chris Bosh and Scott Lost ask for some silence for their shoot interview. Their guest is the handicapped fan from earlier, who explains that he is very smart. He has spent a lot of time online learning about the independent wrestling scene. Bosh doesn’t think much of him so they yell at each other a lot.

The fan turns his back over threats of Bosh exposing himself but is told to sit down. He flips both of them off quite a bit over his DVD choices and then ask him about ask him about his, shall we say, size. The fan lists off various sex acts in regards to Lost and then shouts that Bosh is horny, over and over again. He then howls and leaves to wrap things up.

Overall Rating: B-. One of the criticisms that you hear about PWG is the lack of storylines but that wasn’t the case here at all, with more than enough to keep me into the show and knowing what was going on. That being said, a lot of the wrestling was just ok with the four way and main event being good enough to see. It’s a good enough show and at just a shade over two hours, it’s not something you can complain about all that much. Granted your Ernest tastes may vary, but overall, not bad at all and I could go for more of the company.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2016
Date: August 21, 2016
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,974
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga, John Bradshaw Layfield

A year has passed since I saw this show and I can barely remember much about it. That’s very telling when you look at how stacked this show really is. There are multiple top level matches here and it really wasn’t clear what was going to close the show until the night of the event. Hopefully that means that this SIX HOUR show holds up. Let’s get to it.

So here’s a quick plug. I’m going through the pre-show and there’s a three expert panel of Booker T., Jerry Lawler and Lita. Earlier this year, I met all three of them at WrestleCon. If you’re ever at a Wrestlemania weekend, treat yourself to an amazing time and GO TO WRESTLECON. I met over 120 wrestlers in about four hours. Where else are you going to get to do something like that? Anyway, on with the show.

Pre-Show: American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Who would have thought that Breezango would be the most entertaining out of all these teams? This is pretty much the still titleless Smackdown tag division at this point as they had to bring in the Headbangers and throw together Heath Slater and Rhyno to be able to have a tournament. This is also a rematch from Smackdown, which shows how little effort they were putting into the tag division at this point.

Gable and Breeze start things and the fans are WAY into Gable. Chad twists around as only he can to escape a wristlock and it’s off to Jey, who is quickly driven into the corner. English comes in and says that he’s what a man is. That earns him a right hand to the jaw and it’s off to Mojo to work on a wristlock. Ryder comes in to quite the reaction as Mauro says the Hype Bros have more chemistry than the Periodic Table.

Everything breaks down (What took them so long?) and Ascension clears the ring, only to have American Alpha come off the top (the same corner) with double clotheslines (that’s pure Steiner Brothers). English posts Ryder though and we take a break. Back with Gotch putting Ryder in a chinlock, followed by Viktor doing the same. The other heels take turns stomping on Ryder until Breeze grabs his own chinlock. Fandango adds a slingshot legdrop as this is going WAY longer than it needs to.

JBL thinks cold beer uniting the APA is more effective than furry selfie sticks uniting Breezango but maybe he’s wrong. Ascension knocks the good guys off the apron but Viktor misses a charge in the corner, allowing Ryder to get in a neckbreaker on Konnor. The hot tag (with a limited reaction) brings in Jimmy to clean house.

Jordan gets the real hot tag and does his fired up sequence (which he really is awesome at) with a belly to belly getting two on Breeze. We hit the parade of secondary finishers as the referee is imploring them to tag. Mojo powerbombs Breeze and Viktor out of the corner and the Usos add stereo superkicks to set up stereo dives. Back in and Grand Amplitude plants Gotch, only to have Jey tag himself in for a Superfly Splash and the pin at 14:31. Gable is really not cool with that. Eh just wait until your team is split up for a pretty lame story where Jordan is Kurt Angle’s son.

Rating: B-. If you cut out a few minutes from this, it’s a heck of an opener. There are too many people in the match of course but they kept it moving fast enough (for the most part) to really get something fun out of it. Jordan’s house cleaning spot is a heck of a way to fire the crowd up and it made the match more fun than it should have been. Tweak this a bit (eight/ten man tag or shorten the match a bit) and it’s even better.

Pre-Show: Dudley Boyz vs. Sami Zayn/Neville

Sami works on D-Von’s arm to start and it’s off to Neville for more of the same. Both of them get in more shots as we hear about the rivalry over the NXT Title. I do appreciate the history, especially when Graves should know about that match very well. Bubba is sent outside but D-Von breaks up a springboard dive, allowing Bubba to nail Neville from behind to take over. The fans want tables but a back elbow to Neville’s jaw cuts them off in a hurry.

Back from a break with Bubba hitting his neckbreaker out of the corner. Things slow down even more as Bubba is talking even more than he usually does in a match. Bubba: “COME ON ENGLISH BOY! O-LAY! O-LAY!” The middle rope backsplash misses though and the hot tag brings in Sami. D-Von takes the Blue Thunder Bomb for two but the reverse 3D gets the same. Neville escapes the regular version though and we get some heel miscommunication. The Helluva Kick sets up the Red Arrow to put Bubba away at 7:55.

Rating: C-. That would be it for the Dudleys in WWE as they would have one more segment tomorrow night where Anderson and Gallows sent them packing. It’s also pretty much it for Sami and Neville as a team, which is quite odd as you would think they would be a fine choice for a team. The match was nothing you wouldn’t expect on Raw.

Pre-Show: Cesaro vs. Sheamus

You know, because two matches just weren’t enough for the pre-show. This is the first match of the Best of Seven Series, which really wasn’t too well received. After Cole says Cesaro is facing Cesaro and both Cole and Saxton say this is about establishing physical dominance, we’re ready to go. Sheamus misses a very early Brogue Kick but the spinning springboard uppercut is blocked as well.

Cesaro charges into an uppercut but comes back with a dropkick for one. The ten forearms to the chest are broken up so Sheamus clotheslines him onto the apron instead. It’s off to an armbar on Cesaro’s chronically taped up shoulder but Cesaro lifts him up into that kind of reverse Angle Slam of his. They’re certainly hitting each other hard here, which is pretty much the draw of the whole feud.

Sheamus hits a tilt-a-whirl slam and it’s off to a break. Back with Cesaro fighting out of a chinlock because that rule even applies on pre-shows that will never end. The Irish Curse gives Sheamus two as Cole runs down the pay per view card, which only makes me think that there are FAR too many titles in WWE. They fight over a suplex and fall out to the floor in a heap. Back in and Cesaro starts firing off the running uppercuts in the corner, capped off by a dropkick to knock him off the ropes.

The apron superplex (which wasn’t from the apron) gets two but Sheamus counters the Neutralizer into White Noise for two. There’s the super Regal Roll for two more and frustration is really setting in. Another Brogue Kick attempt is countered by one heck of a clothesline though and Cesaro adds a high crossbody for two of his own. Cesaro tries the Sharpshooter but Sheamus gets to the ropes. Back up and a poke to the eye sets up the Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin at 14:11.

Rating: B. They beat the heck out of each other and it was a fun match but it also brings up the problem: I’m not going to want to watch them fight six more times. No matter how good things are, having them happen so many times in a row over several weeks is going to get tiresome. It happens in all these series and it’s happening here too.

And now, after more wrestling than you get on an average Smackdown, here’s the actual pay per view.

The opening video looks at New York City, with the narrator telling you how AMAZING the city is. I’m not sure if New York City or Texas is worse about bragging about their home’s greatness. As usual, this switches over to a series of quick looks at the biggest matches on the card.

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens

Well duh. That’s about as easy of a choice for an opener as you could ever find for this show. As you might expect, the crowd eats up the opening promo with a spoon and of course we hear a ton of New York City music references. Included are Frank Sinatra, Biggie Smalls and Jay-Z, plus more that probably go over my head. Cass adds in a few songs of his own as this is the only way this show could have opened. Since Graves is the best heel commentator in wrestling today though, he points out that Enzo is from New Jersey.

Jericho and Owens jump Enzo at the bell and the STUPID IDIOT chants start rolling. Enzo comes back with a crossbody and a running right hand to the jaw for two. It’s off to Cass, who drags Owens inside for a beal. That’s some scary power. Enzo gets launched into the corner to crush Jericho but the Canadians bail to the floor. That’s fine with Cass who tosses Enzo over the top onto them in a huge crash. I’ve always loved that spot as it just looks cool.

Back in and Enzo ax handles Owens but turns into a middle rope dropkick from Jericho. The Canadian violence begins with Owens kneeing Enzo from the apron and doing his dance on the apron in a rather funny visual. Owens’ comedic skills aren’t given enough credit more often than not. It’s back to Jericho for the Arrogant Cover and a chinlock with Owens telling Jericho to do it like he taught him.

Owens comes in and adds a gutbuster for two, followed by the running start for a chinlock. It takes real talent to turn a chinlock into an art form but Owens has somehow pulled it off. Enzo finally rolls away but Jericho is there to break up the diving tag attempt. Owens drops the frog splash for two and his stunned looked on the kickout is the usual awesome visual. Enzo gets pulled off the corner to make things even worse but, after blowing a kiss to Jericho, misses the Cannonball.

That means the hot tag to Cass and everything breaks down. Jericho dives into a big boot but Owens breaks up the Bada Boom Shaka Lacka. Cass gets posted on the floor and now the Cannonball against the barricade connects. Back in and Enzo scores with his top rope DDT on Jericho with Owens making the save. A pop up Codebreaker (didn’t look great as Jericho was too far away) ends Enzo at 12:09.

Rating: C+. Odd choice for an ending aside (not surprising of course but odd), this was a good way to get the crowd going. I could have gone for another hope spot from Enzo and more of Cass cleaning house but that pop up Codebreaker could have been a heck of a finisher if done right. Nice opener, though would it have killed them to put Enzo and Cass over in Brooklyn?

Smackdown bosses Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon run into Raw General Manager Mick Foley to brag about how awesome their shows are. Former Daily Show host Jon Stewart and his son come in to ask what Foley is thinking to work with Stephanie. He rants about abuse of power but realizes she’s right behind him. Stephanie yells at him about how great it is to abuse power but thankfully New Day comes up. As the Smackdown bosses and Foley much on cereal, New Day asks Jon if he’d like to do something. He gets out as fast as he can and Stephanie isn’t amused.

We recap Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks. Sasha won the Women’s Title on the first exclusive show after the Brand Split and tonight is the rematch. The other big idea here is Charlotte never loses singles matches on pay per view and Banks has to recreate the magic one more time.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Banks is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Some early WOOing sets up a slightly less early Bank Statement but Charlotte bails to the floor. Back in and Banks climbs the corner for a wristdrag before sending Charlotte face first into the middle buckle. Banks gets caught on top though and Charlotte basically drops her onto the ropes for a backbreaker which almost had to hurt horribly. The fact that Banks had a bad back coming in and Charlotte still did some rather sloppy moves like that got her in some hot water.

We hit a Gory Stretch on the champ for a bit but she comes back with a pair of running clotheslines. That just earns her another backbreaker and Charlotte stomps away at the back. The Figure Eight is broken up but Sasha misses a charge into the corner and gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Charlotte picks her up for a super Razor’s Edge but since that would, you know, kill Sasha, she reverses into a hurricanrana to put them both down.

Back up and a WOO earns Charlotte a string of slaps before Sasha avoids a charge in the corner and hits the double knees to the back for two. Charlotte kicks her in the leg to break up a charge but gets knocked outside again, setting up the double knees from the apron. Back in and the Backstabber doesn’t work but Natural Selection is countered into the Bank Statement (thankfully too as the Natural Selection clearly didn’t send Sasha’s head anywhere near the mat).

Charlotte makes the rope for the break and takes out the knee again. Natural Selection gives Charlotte two so she yells about being better than Sasha. Another Bank Statement goes on but Charlotte reverses into a rollup for the pin and the title at 13:52. Saxton: “Just like that?”

Rating: B. This was just a straight match and that’s the key to the whole thing. The women are getting to show that they can have a good match without the smoke and mirrors, which never would have been the case otherwise. If nothing else it got the kind of time that a title match deserves to develop the story of Banks having a bad back (which would keep her on the shelf for about a month). Strong match here and another of many to come for these two.

Doctors Anderson and Gallows (oh man I had forgotten how stupid this was) run into AJ Styles for a Club reunion. Finn Balor comes up and doesn’t think much of it. Somehow, this has still never gone anywhere.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is defending after winning a triple threat match. Miz comes out wearing a glittery Phantom of the Opera mask while Maryse is basically in a one piece swimsuit. In a sign of the changing times, Mauro talks about Miz’s look instead of Maryse. Miz stomps away in the corner and gets two off a running kick to the chest. Crews gets the same off a rollup, only to walk into the short DDT as it’s almost all Miz to start. We’re already in the reverse chinlock before Miz sends him into the apron to cut off a comeback. Miz takes too long coming off the top though and dives into a dropkick to put both guys down.

A crossbody into a nipup has Miz in trouble as JBL rants about Otunga calling Crews a Jackrobat (jacked acrobat). The Toss Powerbomb is countered so Crews gets two off a tilt-a-whirl powerslam. An overhead belly to belly sets up a standing moonsault, which Otunga sums up perfectly: “A man with that kind of size and that kind of muscle should not be able to do that.” Miz teases taking a walk but Maryse cuts him off, allowing Miz to post Crews. The Skull Crushing Finale retains the title at 5:36.

Rating: D+. Standard Smackdown match and something that could have been cut, or at least put in the Kickoff Show in the place of the Dudleys match. Crews felt like an easy obstacle to overcome because there was nowhere near enough build to set the match up. Put some more effort into the title already people, as it’s just not working.

We recap John Cena vs. AJ Styles. They set up the first match when Styles and Cena were in the ring together, only to have Anderson and Gallows interfere to turn Styles heel. Styles went on a great rant about how Cena was a fraud who couldn’t hang in the ring with someone like him. Cena went into a great speech about how he’s here out of love because it never gets old. AJ beat him at Money in the Bank with assistance from Anderson and Gallows, setting up a rematch between the two here.

AJ Styles vs. John Cena

This just feels big. AJ grabs a waistlock to start but is easily knocked away. The announcers go out of the way to put over how AJ has been on big shows before but nothing this big. Oh I don’t know. I remember him being at that Wrestlemania thing earlier in the year. The dueling chants begin and the AJ STYLES side is pretty clearly stronger.

Cena’s headlock is countered and AJ scores with the dropkick but the bragging earns AJ a right to the jaw. A hard whip into the corner sends AJ down for a bit with Cena doing some rare trash talking. They head to the floor and the fans start belting out JOHN CENA SUCKS, only to have AJ turn it into some gasping with a suplex onto the apron. Cena is right back with a dropkick for two and it’s time for some more right hands to the head.

AJ comes back with a forearm to the face, earning himself Cena’s finishing sequence. It’s way too early for the AA though as AJ hits a Pele, followed by the Styles Clash for a close two. The fans were actually more into the near fall than I was expecting as you would think they’d know better this early. The AA gives Cena two of his own and both guys are down again.

Styles slips out of the super AA and grabs the torture rack for the spinout powerbomb. They’re trading bombs at this point and it’s the only way they should be going here. Something like a Big Ending gives Cena two but he can’t get the STF. Instead it’s the AA neckbreaker for two on Cena (not the same as the AA JBL) but the springboard 450 only hits mat.

A faceplant puts Cena down again though and AJ can’t follow up. He manages the springboard forearm but Cena reverses into the worst STF I’ve ever seen. Thankfully AJ slips out and grabs a Crossface, which Cena powers out of as well. That’s reversed into the Calf Crusher which AJ is smart enough to twist away from the ropes. Cena reverses that into another horrible STF (AJ’s face is on the mat) so AJ is quickly up with the enziguri. A tornado DDT plants AJ and there’s the top rope Fameasser for two.

Cena heads up again and gets taken down with a super hurricanrana (Mauro: “MAMA MIA!”), followed by the Phenomenal Forearm for a VERY near fall (drawing Mauro to his feet). It’s Cena’s turn now as he takes AJ up for the super AA and….it’s two. NOW the fans know it’s on as I don’t think anyone has ever kicked out of that before. Cena is stunned and the AA is countered into another Clash. The Phenomenal Forearm puts Cena away clean at 23:10.

Rating: A. I know it’s not going to sound good but a lot of this goes to Cena. At the end of the day, the crowd completely lost it when AJ kicked out of that super AA. AJ wins here not because he got a pin but because he beat Cena clean. That’s a very, VERY short list and that’s what makes it feel so important. Think back to how big of a deal it was when Warrior pinned Hogan clean. That felt like an era changing win, and while this isn’t quite that big, it’s the same idea.

Oh yeah and it’s an outstanding match and possibly the Match of the Year. This was the heavyweight slugfest formula as they beat the heck out of each other with both guys hitting everything they could until one of them couldn’t get up. That’s a really hard match to pull off and these two did it in an incredible match. It belonged on the grand stage and gives Cena one heck of a mountain to overcome, which he somehow did in a better match at the Royal Rumble.

Post match Cena takes off his wristband and leaves it in the ring. He would do dark matches for a few weeks and then be back wrestling on TV in less than a month so this didn’t mean anything.

Some fans won a contest and got some stuff. In other words, let the fans have a breather.

Here’s Jon Stewart for your celebrity appearance. He makes fun of himself for interfering in Cena’s match last year and says the big lesson he learned was to tuck your shirt in when you’re taking an AA. As for tonight though, he’s here to be in New Day’s corner to help deal with Anderson and Gallows. In honor of the moment, he throws on a unicorn horn and does Big E.’s (out injured due to getting crotched against the post) entrance.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

New Day is defending of course and unfortunately Anderson and Gallows are still doing their stupid doctor nonsense, complete with jars for Kofi, Xavier and Jon’s testicles. I hear Paige can help you with one of those. Anderson headlocks Kofi down to start but he’s right back up with the jumping back elbow to the jaw. Kofi flips onto his feet and gets two off the standing double stomp. You can tell the fans are still recovering from the previous match and it’s off to Woods.

That goes badly as the he gets taken into the corner for a beating from Gallows. At least it does bring the fans back a bit with the rhythmic clapping. Gallows gets taken into the corner for the Unicorn Stampede (which they’ve kind of stopped doing in recent months) and the fans are really not responding. Woods sends him outside so Kofi can hit a running dive (while posing in the air) to take him down again. Back in and Gallows kicks Kofi in the head to take over for real this time with Anderson working on the arm.

That goes nowhere as the hot tag brings in Woods to clean house. Anderson sends him to the apron for an enziguri, setting up the rope walk elbow drop. Everything breaks down and Anderson kicks Kofi in the chest, setting up the Magic Killer. Stewart gets in though and it’s time to crotch him as well. Hang on though as he has to tuck in his shirt first. Cue the returning Big E. for the save though and that’s a DQ at 9:09.

Rating: D. I don’t know if it was the previous match or what but sweet goodness the fans did NOT care for this one. It’s not a good match in the first place as Anderson and Gallows aren’t funny in the doctor roles, but the bigger problem here was the focus being on Stewart at the end. Oh and the ending sets up a rematch, which really isn’t what they need to be going with here. Bad match but Big E.’s return did wake up the crowd.

Big E. drinks the fluid in the jar holding his “testicles”. Stewart dances with New Day and the fans…well they care when Big E. dances at least.

We recap Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler. Dolph won a six way match to earn the shot and then it all went nuts. Ziggler started talking about how he was tired of being told that he always either too good or not good enough. It was time to turn up the jets and become champion for the third time. Serious Ziggler was nice but I don’t think anyone was buying him as having a real chance here. You know, because he’s Dolph Ziggler.

Smackdown World Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Dean is defending and Shane and Daniel are here for no apparent reason. The fans are behind Ziggler and they trade some grappling on the mat with Ziggler getting the better of it (not exactly a surprise). The threat of a neckbreaker sends Ambrose bailing to the floor so Dolph splashes him against the barricade.

Back in and Ziggler’s jumping DDT is countered with Dean throwing him outside again. Ziggler escapes a super Dirty Deeds so Dean slaps on a half crab of all things. You can tell Dean is playing the subtle heel here as the smark crowd is always going to cheer for Ziggler. Dean heads up top and gets dropkicked out of the air but he’s right back with a double chickenwing facebuster.

Ambrose tunes up the band (which is now mocking Ziggler instead of anything involving Shawn Michaels) but shakes his head and tries Dirty Deeds instead. That’s reversed into the jumping DDT and both guys are down again. A double collision gives us another lay down period until Dean is up first and hammering away.

The top rope elbow gets two so Ziggler grabs the sleeper, earning them both a tumble out to the floor. Ziggler gets in the superkick on the floor but it’s barely two back inside. The Zig Zag gets the same but Dean pops back up with the rebound lariat. Ziggler catches Dean on top and pulls him back down, right into Dirty Deeds to retain the title at 15:22.

Rating: D+. And that people, is Ziggler choking again. This would lead to him saying he’s never won the big one, which would turn into him never holding the World Title that long because holding the title is more important than winning it. The match was nothing all that good as we were just waiting on Dirty Deeds, which only happened so Dean could keep it warm for AJ next month. That was completely obvious the second AJ pinned Cena again and that’s all this title needed to do.

Package on Summerslam weekend.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Eva Marie vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Dang I didn’t know the Glow was a year old. Actually hang on a minute as Eva Marie is suffering from exhaustion, anxiety and stress (likely brought on by reading too many Wellness Violation messages, which meant she would never wrestle again) so we have a replacement. At least we got that amazing entrance one more time.

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

So yeah, you know full well that Nikki is going to be all that matters in this match because IT’S HER BIG COMEBACK THAT EVERYONE TOTALLY CARES ABOUT BECAUSE WE LOVE HER SO MUCH! She does get one heck of a pop though, which is rather scary. During her entrance, Mauro declares her return “miraculous”. Oh man this is going to be a long one.

Bliss rolls Becky up to start and gets in a hard slap for good measure. Naomi comes in to scare Alexa off so it’s Natalya instead. A forearm puts Natalya down and the splits legdrop gets two. Carmella comes in for the Staten Island Shuffle before a missed charge sends Natalya outside. Back in and a powerslam out of the corner plants Carmella before it’s off to Nikki, the heel, for a strong face pop.

We hit the chinlock but hang on as we need some Nikki pushups. Alexa chokeshoves Carmella down for the moonsault knees to the ribs as the crowd is dead all over again. The abdominal stretch keeps things slow until Carmella finally rolls over and makes the hot tag to Becky. All three heels are send into the corner for the springboard kicks from Lynch, followed by a Bexploder on Natalya.

Becky’s top rope legdrop gets two with Nikki making the save. A blind tag brings in Naomi for the dancing kicks with the fans just not reacting at all. Bliss’ springboard splash hits knees so it’s off to Nikki vs. Carmella. A bad looking Bronco Buster gets two on Nikki and everything breaks down. Nikki’s big forearm sets up the Rack Attack 2.0 (Nikki: “I’m back.”) for the pin at 11:16.

Rating: D. This was all about Nikki’s return and that’s not enough to carry a dull match. Naomi’s Glow stuff wasn’t over yet, Becky was stuck around people who weren’t up to her level and Carmella was showing that she didn’t need to be on the main roster yet. The same was true for Alexa and Natalya was her usual self. Just not a good match and it showed the lack of depth to the division.

We recap Rusev vs. Roman Reigns. Rusev and Lana were married and so Reigns interrupted for no apparent reason to insult them and shove them into a cake.

Maria Menunos interviews Rusev and Lana, who don’t like her questions about Reigns. They won’t stand for this and Lana is sure that her husband will destroy Reigns.

We recap the Universal Title match. Basically we need a new title due to the Brand Split and Universal Title was the best they could come up with. Seth Rollins was put into the match as Raw’s #1 draft pick and Finn Balor earned his way in by winning a series of matches. Not much else to it as there’s no major animosity between them but it’s better than pulling the title out of a suitcase.

Seth did get in a great promo talking about how he’s done everything Balor has done but he’s done it a little bit better. He’s not wrong, though that’s not the best thing to do when you have someone so new to the main roster. Then Balor showed up as the Demon and scared Rollins to death.

Universal Title: Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Anything goes and the title (which isn’t that well received due to a bad case of being hideous) is vacant coming in. Unless I’m forgetting something, to date this is the only time Balor has wrestled as the Demon on the main roster. We get the Big Match Intros and the title itself receives some hearty boos. Balor dropkicks him into the corner at the bell but it’s too early for the Coup de Grace.

Instead Balor hits a suicide dive to the floor, followed by some kicks to the knee back inside. They head outside again with Seth getting in his first offense via a suplex on the floor. Balor is right back with something like a Phenomenal Forearm off the barricade. Back in again and Balor hits a basement dropkick for two as this is almost one sided so far. Finn stays on the leg as the fans are singing something.

Balor jumps over the ropes but Rollins slides between his legs and powerbombs him into the barricade, completely destroying Balor’s shoulder and putting him on the shelf for the better part of eight months. We’re less than four minutes in though and you can see the shoulder looking all messed up. Back in and Seth gets two off a backbreaker, setting up a chinlock. The chants are still going and it sounds like THAT TITLE SUCKS to the tune of John Cena Sucks.

Seth starts the trash talk and cuts off a comeback attempt. A snapmare into a kick to the back has Finn in even more trouble but Seth would rather walk around than follow up. It’s back to the chinlock for a good while until the springboard knee to the head sets up Seth’s frog splash for two. What looks like a Rainmaker is countered into a DDT to give Balor his first major offense in a long time and he follows up with some forearms.

A basement dropkick sets up the Sling Blade but Seth kicks him down without much effort. An enziguri stuns Balor but he’s right back with the Pele, earning a very nice round of applause. If nothing else the chants about the title have stopped. 1916 (reverse implant DDT) gives Finn two but the Coup de Grace is countered into a triangle choke of all things. Finn falls outside because rope breaks don’t count (anything goes remember) and things slow down a bit.

Back in and the buckle bomb sets up the low superkick for two on Balor with Seth looking stunned on the kickout. A small package driver gets the same count and reaction so Seth goes up, allowing Balor to hit a very loud enziguri to put him on the floor. Balor adds a shotgun dropkick to send him into the barricade, followed by a top rope double stomp to the back of the head for two. The Coup de Grace misses and it’s a Pedigree for two. Finn counters a second Pedigree into a double stomp, followed by the Coup de Grace for the pin and the title at 19:23.

Rating: B+. When you factor in that shoulder injury, this is quite the impressive performance. Above all else though, how good is it that Balor won the title here? If he loses his first major pay per view match and then goes away until April, he’s lucky to come back to the cruiserweight division.

This was a heck of a match with both guys beating the heck out of each other. It took some time to get built up but once they finally got there, the fans really started to accept things, which is a very positive sign. Balor is someone who is going to get a very positive reaction no matter what and giving him the title here was entirely the right call.

Balor can barely move his right arm after the match but finally holds the title up. On his WWE 24 special, he said you could feel and hear the shoulder crunching and crackling as he lifted the title and it probably did more damage to the arm.

The pre-show channel chats a bit and throws us to a KFC ad with Dolph Ziggler dressing up as Colonel Sanders to beat up Miz dressed as a chicken. It’s actually dumber than you remember it being.

Here’s Lana to introduce Rusev, albeit while wearing half of a wedding dress, the bottom of which looks like a diaper. She’s one of the most beautiful women on the roster but she looks ridiculous here.

US Title: Rusev vs. Roman Reigns

Roman is challenging and the booing is strong with this one. Rusev jumps him before the bell and they fight out to the floor with Roman being sent into the steps. The fans chant RUSEV MACHKA because they’ve given up on America over their hatred for Reigns. Roman gets in a Superman Punch as the bell hasn’t rung yet. They fight over a chair with Reigns getting the better of it and destroying Rusev. Reigns finally leaves but comes back with a spear, all while the fans chant WE WANT SLATER. No match of course, likely due to time issues.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar. This match was announced as Orton’s return match from surgery and the build focused on Orton being able to hit the RKO anytime, including a sweet moment where Orton interrupted a Lesnar promo with an RKO. The hype video even includes some OVW clips as they came up through developmental together and debuted within a few months of each other. This had a heck of a build and felt like something important but the question was whether Lesnar would have an actual match or just do his usual Lesnar stuff.

Randy Orton vs. Brock Lesnar

Heyman handles Lesnar’s introduction, saying he’s conquering out of the University of Suplex City. Brock seems to get into his MMA stance to start before driving Orton into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. Orton escapes the first German suplex attempt but can’t hit the RKO.

Now the first suplex connects (with Mauro knowing that it’s the 33^rd Lesnar has hit at Summerslam because he’s awesome that way) and Brock follows with two more. Orton is almost out on his feet so Lesnar suplexes him again. It’s nothing but suplexes at this point and it’s already getting dull. They head outside for a much needed change of pace with Orton being thrown over the announcers’ table.

Orton gets thrown from the front row through the table as this is dominance. The other table is loaded up but whatever Lesnar is trying is countered into the RKO onto (not through) the table. The hanging DDT plants Lesnar back inside and another RKO gets two. Orton realizes he has no choice and tries the Punt, only to have it reversed into the F5 (bad one) for two more.

That’s enough for Lesnar so he takes off the gloves and pads and hammers on Orton. An elbow to the head actually busts Orton open VERY badly. Lesnar just keeps hammering on him while the fans chant GOLDBERG until the referee FINALLY stops it at 11:47. I’ve heard a bunch of answers about what happened but I believe this was the planned ending and a hard way opening.

Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t work when it happened and it didn’t work again this time around. Lesnar suplexing Orton for five minutes then selling a few big moves doesn’t make me think it’s an awesome main event. This was everything wrong with Lesnar’s current WWE run in one match and that made for a really dull match, save for the odd finish that seemed designed to protect Orton. You know, after he was basically squashed.

Lesnar keeps hammering on him until the always intimidating Shane McMahon comes out, earning himself an F5 (which thankfully didn’t lead anywhere). Heyman panics as they leave to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. If you cut an hour (or more) out of this, it’s bordering on the classic level. As it is, this is just a good show that runs WAY too long. At some point you have to cut something out and WWE just refuses to do that. Cut out the Dudleys match or the women’s tag and give us some breathing room here because sweet goodness this show could use it.

Now that being said, there’s some outstanding stuff on here with the Styles vs. Cena match as an instant classic, the Women’s Title being very good, a great Universal Title match and really only the Tag Team Title match being without much value. The show is certainly good and the positives outweigh the negatives but unless the show is a masterpiece, fans are going to start losing interest near the end. It’s a solid show but cut out a good forty minutes to really make it great.

Ratings Comparison

American Alpha/Hype Bros/Usos vs. Breezango/Ascension/Vaudevillains

Original: C

2017 Redo: B-

Dudley Boyz vs. Neville/Sami Zayn

Original: C

2017 Redo: C-

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Original: B-

2017 Redo: B

Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass

Original: C+

2017 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Original: B

2017 Redo: B

Miz vs. Apollo Crews

Original: C

2017 Redo: D+

John Cena vs. AJ Styles

Original: A

2017 Redo: A

New Day vs. Anderson and Gallows

Original: D+

2017 Redo: D

Dolph Ziggler vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-

2017 Redo: D+

Natalya/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Naomi/Carmella

Original: C

2017 Redo: D

Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Original: B+

2017 Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Randy Orton

Original: C+

2017 Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B

2017 Redo: B-

That’s quite the drop on Ambrose vs. Ziggler and Lesnar vs. Orton. Some of them are spot on though and that’s not the biggest surprise.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/08/21/summerslam-2016-they-didnt/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 

Smackdown
Date: July 17, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s the go home show for Extreme Rules and I think I can safely say thank goodness for that. We’ve had a long road to get here and there is one big match to go, as Matt Riddle challenges AJ Styles for the Intercontinental Title. Hopefully they can add in a little more for the pay per view, as it only has six matches set. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

AJ Styles is ready to beat the barefoot bump to retain the title because Riddle is a flash in the pan.

Matt Riddle is ready to beat Arrogant Jackass all over again.

Daniel Bryan is ready to see a new champion.

Alexa Bliss has a special mystery guest on A Moment of Bliss. Who is it? She doesn’t Bliss and tell.

Miz and John Morrison are getting ready for Morrison’s match against Braun Strowman. And something about fighting Jean Claude Van Damme on a yacht.

Braun Strowman hopes Bray Wyatt is watching tonight.

Shinsuke Nakamura and Cesaro are ready to pick the stipulation for Sunday’s Tag Team Title match after Cesaro beats Big E.

New Day doesn’t think so.

Big E. vs. Cesaro

Kofi Kingston and Shinsuke Nakamura are at ringside and the winner gets to pick the stipulation (between a tables match and a cage match) for Sunday. They go outside in a hurry with Big E. driving him into the steps. A spear into the steps makes it even worse but Big E. misses a charge into the post back inside. Cesaro posts him again and hits a middle rope ax handle to the head for two. The chinlock goes on but Big E. fights up with belly to belly suplexes. The apron splash connects and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro cutting off a comeback big with an uppercut but Big E. reverses the Neutralizer into the Brock Lock of all things. That’s reversed as well and Cesaro swings him into the Sharpshooter. Cesaro switches into a Crossface but Big E. makes the rope. Kofi gets taken out as Big E. loads up the Big Ending, which nearly hits the referee. The distraction lets Nakamura get in a cheap shot and the Neutralizer lets Cesaro make the choice at 10:07.

Rating: C. This is a match that could have worked better with some more time and it worked out well enough here. They had been teasing a tables match for a few weeks now so the ending wasn’t quite in doubt, but I’ll take a little drama over building momentum every time.

Post match Cesaro and Nakamura load up another table but Kofi is back for the save. Nakamura gets Cesaro off the table in time though and they bail.

King Corbin wants to see Styles retain tonight because he doesn’t like Riddle. See, Riddle is playing with fire by going after the big dogs and tonight he’s going to get burned. Tonight, people are going to realize that the Bro is a little boy.

It’s time for A Moment of Bliss, with Alexa Bliss feeling clairvoyant. She thinks the Los Angeles Lakers are going to win the NBA Championship, that Matt Riddle is winning the Intercontinental Title tonight, that Braun Strowman is going to win the Swamp Fight, and that her mystery guest is going to tear the roof off on Sunday. Nikki Cross thinks it’s her and promises to do just that against Bayley. Bliss asks how many Nitro Boosts Cross has had, because she isn’t the guest.

Cue Bayley and Sasha Banks, with Bayley promising to retain on Sunday. She has a prediction of her own: on Sunday, she is beating Nikki and Banks is beating the Empress of Yesterday Asuka, to win every belt there is. That’s all well and good, but Bayley and Banks aren’t the guest. Cue Asuka, with the brawl starting in a hurry. Bliss says get a referee out here.

Hold on though as Daniel Bryan says that he thinks Riddle is winning the title again.

Asuka/Nikki Cross vs. Bayley/Sasha Banks

Non-title. Cross throws Bayley down to start and hammers away on her in the corner. Banks offers a distraction though and Bayley pulls her down by the hair. The armbar doesn’t last long and it’s back to Bayley to stomp away. A double whip sends Cross into the corner again and Bayley grabs the chinlock. That lasts as long as your run of the mill chinlock and Cross fights up for the tag off to Asuka. House is cleaned in a hurry and Asuka ties Banks up in the ring skirt.

It’s back to Cross to forearm away and scream a lot. Bayley’s baseball slide under the corner is countered into the ring skirt as well and it’s Cross and Asuka hitting dives off the apron. Dancing takes us to the break. Back with Asuka in trouble and Banks stomping away before handing it back to Bayley. More stomping ensues and it’s Banks grabbing the chinlock.

Bayley misses an elbow though and it’s a hot tag to Cross to pick up the pace. A bulldog out of the corner drops Banks but she’s right back with a dropkick to the ribs for two. Bayley comes back in and sends Cross outside, where Cross hits a springboard tornado DDT off the announcers’ table. Everyone winds up back inside until Banks kicks Asuka to the floor. The Meteora off the apron misses and Asuka kicks Banks down, leaving Bayley to counter another DDT into a rollup with feet on the ropes to pin Cross at 14:20.

Rating: C+. The energy was high here, though I’m still not believing there is much of a chance at either title changing hands on Sunday. Bayley and Banks have been on television a lot as of late and they’re really gelling as a team as of late. The problem though is they’re beating everyone and I’m not sure who is left to give them a real challenge.

Miz fires up Morrison, who compares Strowman to a movie monster. They’re movie guys, but Miz isn’t going to be the best friend who dies fighting said monster. He’ll have Morrison’s back though.

This week’s Firefly Fun House takes us to the Swamp with Eater of Worlds Wyatt. Bray talks about how he brought Strowman here and told him the truth. He gave Strowman a purpose and created the monster. But then Strowman left, only to want to come back to the swamp to face Wyatt once and for all. Wyatt wants his monster to come home because the monster is still inside.

John Morrison vs. Braun Strowman

Non-title and Miz is in Morrison’s corner. Before the match, Strowman talks about having to go to the swamp and slap the devil in the face to end this once and for all. Strowman starts fast and hits the running clothesline in the corner. Morrison gets forearmed in the chest over and over, followed by a one armed chokeslam. The old head and arm choke sets up the running powerslam to finish Morrison at 1:47. That’s how it should have gone.

Post match, Strowman says he’s coming home. Strowman leaves and Morrison needs help getting out.

Naomi vs. Lacey Evans

Naomi cuts off Lacey’s pre-match promo and we’re ready to go. A few shots to the ribs have Lacey in early trouble but she knocks Naomi down and hits the slingshot elbow. The bottom rope moonsault hits Naomi’s raised knees and some kicks to the ribs keep Lacey in trouble. There’s a running hurricanrana to put Lacey in the corner and a kick to the head knocks her down on the apron. Lacey catches her charging in and ties the hair around the ropes for a creative stop. That’s broken up and the Woman’s Right finishes Naomi at 2:43. So why couldn’t they just do this last week?

Jeff Hardy talks about how fighting a bully like Sheamus is like fighting addiction. Yes it’s risky to walk into a bar but it’s going to be worth the chance to beat up Sheamus. As for tonight’s Intercontinental Title match…..well I’m not sure actually as Sheamus kicks him in the face. Sheamus says he’s here to cleanse Jeff of his demons, so see you next week fella. So the Bar Fight is on Smackdown and not at the pay per view? Ok then.

Bayley and Banks talk about having the momentum going into Sunday.

Cross is upset about losing and doesn’t want to let everyone down. Bliss tries to calm her down but Cross runs after Bayley and Banks, who are standing nearby. Bliss has to break it up, with Bayley wanting a leash on Cross.

Here are the same promos from AJ and Riddle that opened the show.

Intercontinental Title: Matt Riddle vs. AJ Styles

Styles is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Riddle blocks an early Irish whip attempt and hits the rolling gutwrench suplexes to put AJ on the floor. A running knee puts AJ down again so he rips off the announcers’ table, only to get kicked in the head. We take a break and come back with AJ still in trouble as commentary thinks he’s off his game tonight.

AJ manages a belly to back faceplant to drop Riddle though and it’s time for the forearms in the corner. Some shots to the leg have Riddle in trouble and we hit the chinlock. Riddle powers up and drives him into the corner, setting up the running backsplash. The Bro To Sleep into the Final Flash connects for two and we take another break.

Back again with AJ hitting a clothesline out of the corner but Riddle strikes away without much trouble. Riddle charges into a superkick though but AJ can’t hit the Styles Clash. Instead Riddle hits a ripcord knee to the face, only to miss the Floating Bro. A brainbuster gives AJ two but he has to fight out of the Bro Derek. They strike it out with AJ reversing a Pele into the Calf Crusher. Riddle reverses that into a Bromission attempt but can’t quite get it on. Instead, AJ reverses into a cradle for the clean pin at 18:07.

Rating: B. I’m not wild on the 50/50 booking, though losing a clean fall to AJ Styles is far from some career killer. Riddle has gotten a good start to his run on Smackdown, but I’m worried about the double hit of losing here and then having to feud with Corbin for weeks on end. I know he had frostbite on his feet, but that isn’t the kind of heat he needs.

Post match AJ shakes Riddle’s hand but here’s Corbin from behind to beat Riddle down.

Overall Rating: C+. Maybe it was last week’s show being so bad but this was a lot easier to watch than most shows. Imagine that: you get rid of the stupid stuff like karaoke and have a good, long main event and the show gets that much better. I still have no desire to watch Extreme Rules, but at least they had something better here for a change.

Results

Cesaro b. Big E. – Neutralizer

Bayley/Sasha Banks b. Asuka/Nikki Cross – Rollup with feet on the ropes to Cross

Braun Strowman b. John Morrison – Running powerslam

Lacey Evans b. Naomi – Woman’s Right

AJ Styles b. Matt Riddle – Cradle

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series 2016
Date: November 20, 2016
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 17,143
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, David Otunga

I say this every year but it’s always hard to believe that it’s been a full year since this show. This was the first time that a Survivor Series was expanded to four hours but thankfully there’s a good chance that they could make it work, mainly due to the elimination matches. The main event though is Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg, which I’m sure will be completely uneventful. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Drew Gulak/Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese vs. Noam Dar/TJ Perkins/Rich Swann

This is a preview match for something called 205 Live, which debuts next week. I know it hasn’t gone great but the division really has evolved into a better place than when it started. Swann gets a nice reaction and then starts with Nese, who gets chopped in the corner. They do their regular flips with Swann’s jump over Nese’s feet getting a good pop (as always) before it’s off to Perkins.

Some suplexes set up an Octopus Hold but Nese reverses into a kind of gutwrench suplex. Gulak comes in and gets caught in the wrong corner with everyone working him over. We actually get a TJ PERKINS chant as he slaps on the kneebar to keep Gulak in trouble. Everything breaks down and we take a break.

Back with Daivari in trouble this time as Dar gets two off a running kick to the face. Nese offers a distraction though and a spinebuster takes Dar down. A superkick gives Daivari two and it’s back to Gulak to crank on the leg. If this sounds rather uninteresting, it’s only because that’s what it is.

Dar dropkicks his way to freedom and the hot tag brings in Swann to very little reaction. A good looking jumping hurricanrana takes Daivari off the middle rope as everything breaks down again. That means we hit the dives but the referee CUTS PERKINS OFF. Now you know that’s not working so Perkins dives over the referee to take out some villains. Back in and Swann’s standing 450 ends Daivari at 11:48.

Rating: C-. I forgot how uninteresting these earlier cruiserweight matches were. The guys barely have characters and the entire story here was “three faces vs. three heels”. It didn’t get much better for a long time but, as usual, the problem comes down to one simple thing: if the smaller guys on the main roster can be big stars and do all these dives, why should I be impressed when cruiserweights can do them too?

Kickoff Show: Luke Harper vs. Kane

Harper is part of the NEW Wyatt Family, which screwed Kane over, meaning we need a match here. Kane grabs a full nelson of all things and we’re in a chinlock fifteen seconds in. That goes nowhere so Harper grabs a headlock as the fans are oddly split here. Kane starts in on the shoulder by sending it into the buckle. Harper sends him outside though and hits that suicide shove of his (Who needs cruiserweights?).

A slingshot flip splash gives Luke two and we take a break. Back with Kane in a chinlock (well duh) but managing to superplex Harper down for a crash. The sidewalk slam gets two but Harper scores with a superkick for the same. Kane’s running DDT and Harper’s Boss Man Slam are good for two more each but it’s the chokeslam to put Harper away at 9:10.

Rating: D+. Well what were you expecting here? This was exactly the match you would have planned out for them and Kane won with his finisher. It’s about as paint by numbers of a power match as you can get and while it wasn’t terrible, it’s also a match I really didn’t need to see.

The opening video looks at Goldberg vs. Lesnar and then all the Raw vs. Smackdown matches. Well at least they got some time. I’m sure Stephanie’s voiceovers had nothing to do with it.

Raw Women’s Team vs. Smackdown Women’s Team

Raw: Bayley, Alicia Fox, Charlotte, Nia Jax, Sasha Banks

Smackdown: Alexa Bliss, Becky Lynch, Carmella, Naomi, Nikki Bella

Entrances alone take forever of course, which will be a theme tonight. Charlotte is Raw Women’s Champion and has Dana Brooke in her corner. Becky is Smackdown Women’s Champion but Nikki is captain. You know, because of course. Bliss gets a heck of a reaction (gee I wonder why). Actually hang on a second as there’s no Nikki. We cut to the back where she’s down after being attacked. Not to worry though, as Smackdown coach Natalya is more than willing to take the spot.

Carmella and Alicia get things going and it’s an early northern lights suplex to give Fox two. That just earns her a trip into the corner for the Staten Island Shuffle…and let’s look at Team Raw while Fox gets in a kick to the face. That felt like a hard edit to make sure we didn’t see something. Becky comes in and wants Bayley but Charlotte tags herself in instead. Banks does the same though and everything breaks down as Team Raw is about to implode. As usual, I would ask why Team Smackdown didn’t just let them. Nia will have none of this though and easily clears the ring to settle things down.

We settle down to Becky and Banks trading rollups before it’s off to Charlotte for more of the same. Becky can’t get the Disarm-Her and it’s off to Nia as things get a lot more difficult. Carmella and Bliss come in for the expected results and Naomi’s high crossbody is pulled out of the air. Natalya actually gets a reaction but Nia clotheslines her head off for her efforts. It’s off to Fox vs. Carmella with Alicia avoiding a Bronco Buster, setting up what looked to be a mostly missed ax kick for the elimination at 6:35. Bliss comes right in, sends Fox into the buckle and adds Twisted Bliss to tie it up at 6:48.

Charlotte and Naomi come in with the latter cleaning house, including knocking Nia outside and hitting a high crossbody to the floor. Nia posts her though and that’s a countout at 8:23. We pause for the Tye Dillinger TEN chant until Bliss takes Banks down and grinds her face into the mat. Banks sends Bliss and Natalya into each other, followed by the double knees in the corner to Alexa. Back up and Bliss saves Natalya from the Bank Statement, allowing Natalya to roll Banks up for the elimination at 10:20.

Charlotte comes in and gets suplexed, meaning we hit the SUPLEX CITY chants. You would think fans would know more chants than that. Charlotte goes up for the moonsault but, as always, Natalya powerbombs her down for two in the near fall that never ends Charlotte. The required Sharpshooter sends Charlotte crawling for the ropes but a big boot ends Natalya at 12:01.

Becky and Bliss get in an argument over who should come in, allowing Jax to suplex them both at the same time. Of course that gets a MAMA MIA from Mauro, which I miss hearing so often. Bliss gets caught in a slam but Becky makes a blind tag and missile dropkicks Bliss in the back to knock her onto Jax. The Disarm-Her actually makes Jax tap at 13:35 and it’s 2-2 with Becky/Bliss vs Charlotte/Bayley.

Jax mauls Becky, leaving Bliss to get big booted down for the elimination at 14:03. Becky fights back as fast as she can with the series of clotheslines into the leg lariat, followed by Bexplex. Bayley has to dive in for a save after a top rope legdrop before coming in for the slugout. Another Bexplex gets two but Bayley’s elbow to the back gets the same. You can tell Becky is getting tired out there so Bayley blocks the Disarm-Her and grabs the Bayley to Belly for the final pin at 17:53.

Rating: C+. The quick eliminations didn’t help things here but the ending was the right call. There was way too much talent on the Raw side to lose and I’m VERY glad it was Natalya, who can wrestle this style without having to dumb things down too much. Becky was pretty much all the blue team had for a lot of the match and she put up a valiant effort, only to be outgunned. That makes her look strong and Bayley getting a win like this is a good thing for her at this stage in her main roster career.

Charlotte takes Bayley out post match and beats her around ringside.

Smackdown mascot James Ellsworth runs into Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows, who weren’t funny in 2016 either. They make some bad chin puns but Raw GM Mick Foley comes in to run them off. Ellsworth talks about all the great memories he has of Foley, most of which involve him being in extreme pain. Foley thanks him anyway and suggests Ellsworth move to Raw. He appreciates the offer but politely turns it down because he’s true blue. Foley leaves and Ellsworth runs into Braun Strowman, who asks if he knows Ellsworth. James runs in a smart move.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Miz is defending and Sami is trying to take the title to Raw. We get the Big Match Intros and Sami gets quite the reaction for being Canadian. Sami spins out of a wristlock to start and Miz looks annoyed in the corner. Miz gets sent outside but Sami has to bail out of the flip dive. The moonsault off the barricade works though, drawing over Maryse for a distraction. Well she can be quite distracting.

This one works well with Miz taking out the knee to get his first advantage. Some hard stomps to the knees have Sami in trouble but he’s still able to clothesline Miz to the floor. A flip dive works as well, followed by a Michinoku Driver for two. Miz’s short DDT gets the same and it’s time for a double breather. The running corner dropkick/clothesline look to set up the ax handle but Sami reverses into the Blue Thunder Bomb.

The Helluva Kick only hits corner though and that means the Figure Four. This one stays on for a good while until Sami makes the ropes, earning himself some YES Kicks. Sami reverses one into a Figure Four of his own but Maryse rings the bell. Since Sami isn’t all that bright, he of course falls for it, only to have Miz roll him up to retain at 14:06.

Rating: C-. Kind of a dull match as you knew a lot of Sami’s near falls weren’t going anywhere. I can go for Miz and Maryse teaming up to steal wins though and it’s a big reason why he’s been an awesome Intercontinental Champion. This would also help play into Sami’s heel turn nearly a year later as he would get tired of losing while playing by the rules. Makes sense, especially in a long term form.

Dean Ambrose and AJ Styles are bickering over being teammates tonight when Shane McMahon comes in and tells them to cool it so Smackdown doesn’t lose again.

Raw Tag Teams vs. Smackdown Tag Teams

Raw: Enzo Amore/Big Cass, Cesaro/Sheamus, Gallows and Anderson, New Day, Shining Stars

Smackdown: American Alpha, Breezango, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Hype Bros, Usos

A fall eliminates both members of a team. Enzo and Cass suck up to the live crowd, as you might expect. New Day and Slater/Rhyno are the respective champions. Fandango tries to give everyone a fashion ticket to start, earning himself a Midnight Hour for the elimination at 44 seconds. New Day spends too much time celebrating though and it’s a superkick from Jimmy to pin Big E. at 1:08.

Gallows comes in to punch Jimmy in the face before handing it off to Cass for the tall power. The fast tags continue as it’s off to Epico vs. Ryder (who is rocking some old school Survivor Series logo trunks) with Mojo coming in for a clap around the ears. Rawley gets taken down into the corner for the huge group beating though as we keep trying to get everyone in. It’s back to Ryder (not Slater like the fans want) but Gallows saves Anderson from the Broski Boot. Instead it’s the Magic Killer to pin Ryder at 5:08.

Gable comes in as Graves talks about how scared he is of American Alpha. It doesn’t seem to be the most valid fear to start though as Epico takes Gable down into a chinlock. Some rolling suplexes have Gable in more trouble and Primo comes in with a springboard ax handle to the ribs. He misses a charge in the corner though and it’s off to Jordan for a quick Steiner Bulldog to get rid of the Stars at 8:08.

The six remaining teams (Enzo/Big Cass, Cesaro/Sheamus, Gallows and Anderson vs. American Alpha, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Usos) come in at once as everything breaks down. That means Enzo gets tossed over the top onto a big pile….which was mainly Raw guys but whatever. Rhyno gets thrown over the top as well, only to have Slater add an even bigger dive. Back in and Cesaro swings Jordan but Gable makes the save with a Rolling Chaos Theory.

Gable isn’t done though as Jordan throws him over the top for a HUGE flip dive onto everyone. Sweet goodness those two were awesome together. I mean, not as awesome as Jordan on his own with Kurt Angle kind of around but still. Back in and it’s a quick Magic Killer to get rid of Jordan at 10:39 as the eliminations are still flying. A spinebuster plants Slater and he’s caught in the wrong corner.

Sheamus won’t tag Cesaro (this was before their ridiculous matching outfits) and an argument breaks out, allowing the hot tag off to Rhyno as everyone bickers. Rhyno comes in and Gores Gallows for an elimination at 12:28. Cass wastes no time with a big boot to Rhyno, followed by the Bada Boom Shaka Lacka for the pin at 12:45.

That leaves us with the Usos….who superkick Enzo down to set up the Superfly Splash and an elimination at 13:26 before I can type the Raw teams. So now we’re down to the Usos vs. Cesaro/Sheamus with the latter hitting the ten forearms (you know the chant) on Jimmy. Cesaro comes in and eats a double superkick but Sheamus Brogue kicks Jimmy with Jey making a diving save.

Super White Noise plants Jimmy again but Jey is right back with a Superfly Splash for two with Cesaro making a save of his own. The hot tag brings in Cesaro for the Uppercut Train and a 619 as the fans lose their minds over Cesaro again. A high crossbody gets two on Jey and it’s time for the Swing. Jimmy breaks up the Sharpshooter and Jey gets the Tequila Sunrise. That’s reversed right back into the Sharpshooter with Sheamus remembering he’s in the match to cut off Jimmy, leaving Jey to tap at 18:55.

Rating: B. This was during the time that I couldn’t stand Sheamus and Cesaro (not a lot has changed in a year) but they did a lot of stuff in this match, despite the crunched timeline. Getting nine eliminations in less than nineteen minutes is a lot but you have to clear the ring out at the beginning. It’s entertaining, but hits a hard ceiling that it’s not getting past.

Stephanie and Foley decide that Sheamus and Cesaro should get a Tag Team Title shot tomorrow night. They recap the rest of the show with Stephanie getting way too serious, as usual.

Preview for TLC with Dean Ambrose vs. AJ Styles in a TLC match for the title.

Cruiserweight Champion Brian Kendrick does his best Sean O’Haire impression and is ready for Kalisto. If Kalisto wins, he brings the division to Smackdown. It’s fine for a one off match but it was really hard to buy Kendrick as the best cruiserweight in the company in 2016.

Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Kendrick is defending and charges straight into a knee to the face. Kalisto is right back with a suicide dive, followed by a springboard corkscrew crossbody for two. Some rollups give Kalisto more near falls and a shotgun dropkick has Kendrick in even more trouble. A rollup into the corner finally gives Kendrick a breather and he crushes Kalisto between the steps and the apron for good measure.

Back in and we hit the cravate to slow things back down. Kalisto manages to fight up and get to the apron where he grabs a C4 out to the floor in the big crash of the match. A good looking suicide dive takes Kendrick down again but he reverses a super Salida Del Sol into the Captain’s Hook. Kalisto finally grabs the ropes and fires off some kicks, followed by the hurricanrana driver. The Salida Del Sol gets two with Kendrick getting to the ropes. Kalisto heads up top….and here’s Baron Corbin for the DQ at 12:21.

Rating: C-. The match was good at times but Kendrick really isn’t the kind of guy you want as a long term champion. It also didn’t help that you knew they weren’t changing up the cruiserweight division so close to 205 Live’s launch. Corbin interfering was fine enough, but it really does make the title match feel like a big waste of time.

The Kickoff Show panel recaps the show so far.

Daniel Bryan yells at Corbin, who doesn’t want little pests running around on Smackdown.

We recap the men’s Survivor Series match, which started in July at the second Brand Split. Naturally this is about the McMahons as Shane and Stephanie are the Commissioners and therefore they have to be fighting. We look at all the entrants as this is treated like the major match is should be treated as. Then Shane is added to the match and that notion kind of falls apart.

Raw Men’s Team vs. Smackdown Men’s Team

Raw: Braun Strowman, Chris Jericho, Kevin Owens, Roman Reigns

Seth Rollins

Smackdown: AJ Styles, Bray Wyatt, Dean Ambrose, Randy Orton, Shane McMahon

AJ and Owens are the World Champions, Reigns is US Champion and Ellsworth is here as the mascot. This is also during the period where Orton is part of the Wyatt Family because we needed that story to get to Orton as World Champion again. Rollins gets a nice reaction and it’s far better without BURN IT DOWN or whatever the line is. AJ and Owens start things off with Styles wasting no time in hitting the drop down into the dropkick.

That’s enough of that though as it’s and they slug it out with AJ getting the better of it. The STUPID IDIOT chants mean it’s time for Jericho, who throws his shirt at AJ and hammers away. Styles dropkicks him down again as the announcers discuss Jericho insulting Undertaker on Twitter. It’s off to Ambrose vs. Rollins, which turns into far more of a wrestling match than it should.

Rollins can’t get a Pedigree so let’s go back to Jericho. Chris yells at Dean for the $15,000 jacket issue, earning himself some really bad armdrags. An enziguri cuts Dean down for two but Ambrose is right back with a bunch of right hands to the head. Shane comes in for the first time and my interest goes down. I’m still not a fan of middle aged Shane and this isn’t likely to change things.

Shane’s bad punches and an armdrag (better than Dean’s) take Jericho down until a dropkick cuts him off. The announcers debate the TV ratings as Reigns comes in and gets booed out of the building. Roman hammers him down in the corner and Seth comes in for a chinlock. That’s broken up so let’s go with Dean vs. Kevin. Owens hits a superkick but gets caught in a hurricanrana, only to have Jericho break up Dirty Deeds.

Everything breaks down and Strowman tags himself in, leaving the fans to chant for Ellsworth. The fight heads outside with Dean being left alone in the ring until Strowman catches his slingshot dive. Strowman walks him around the ring until AJ’s slingshot forearm to the floor breaks it up. Owens dives onto everyone and Strowman tosses Shane across the ring in a pretty good power display.

Some double teaming doesn’t do much to stop Strowman but they manage to knock him outside. That’s enough of Dean and Ambrose working together so they get in a fight, allowing Strowman to hit the running powerslam for the pin on Dean at 15:57. AJ was looking right at the cover and didn’t move. Shane gets to beat on Strowman for a bit but thankfully he gets hammered down as well.

The Phenomenal Forearm is pulled out of the air with AJ being tossed outside in a nasty heap. Orton gets thrown aside too but a stare from Bray stops Strowman in his tracks. Strowman grabs Jericho by the throat but decides to run Bray over instead, followed by a dropkick to put him on the floor. Braun goes outside as well but runs into an RKO onto the announcers’ table. After we pause to see what a random eight year old fan thought of it (he was applauding), Shane drops the top rope elbow to put Strowman through said table. That and Ellsworth grabbing Braun’s foot get Strowman counted out at 21:18.

Strowman catches Ellsworth running up the ramp though (How slow is this guy?) and throws him off the stage through some tables. Everyone else is mostly dead until Jericho covers Shane for two. Owens is fresh enough to drop the backsplash on Shane for two (but only after mocking the dance). There’s the Lionsault but Shane gets two of his own off a small package.

Shane takes a Codebreaker but Orton comes in before the cover, meaning Shane survives another finisher. He avoids a top rope splash though and it’s off to AJ to work on Jericho. With Owens getting in an insult to AJ’s hair (too far man), Jericho counters the Styles Clash into a failed Walls attempt. The Phenomenal Blitz rocks Jericho but Owens comes in with the List of Jericho to blast AJ. That’s a DQ at 29:23, but not before he gives AJ a Pop Up Powerbomb.

Orton gets the tag and comes in with the RKO to get rid of Jericho at 30:19. Notice Reigns blankly staring up at the ramp and not hearing the RKO RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. So it’s down to Shane/AJ/Orton/Wyatt vs. Reigns/Rollins with Orton hammering on Rollins to start. Wyatt and Orton take turns on Seth as Shane is still laid on the apron after his long time in the ring. The superplex takes Rollins down (looks great too) but it allows the hot tag to Reigns. AJ comes in as well and MY GOODNESS the fans do not like Reigns.

House is cleaned with a series of Samoan drops, followed by a great looking Razor’s Edge powerbomb for two on AJ. Seriously that was good enough to cut off the booing. A Pele cuts off a Superman Punch and it’s back to Shane for no logical reason. Shane gets in a tornado DDT to drop Reigns and a clothesline takes Rollins down. Reigns tries a spear but gets awkwardly countered into the post.

In probably the spot of the match, Shane loads up Coast to Coast but gets speared out of the air for a SICK landing. Shane actually kicks out at two but you can see that he is completely gone. Like Lesnar after the botched shooting star gone. The referee says Shane is eliminated at 37:07, presumably due to his brains looking like a pie that has been run over by a bus driven by raccoons.

We pause for a bit as doctors get Shane out of the ring until Roman blasts Bray with a clothesline. Rollins and AJ get stereo hot tags with Seth’s Blockbuster putting Styles down. There’s the slingshot knee to AJ and a suicide dive to Wyatt. With Reigns down on the floor, let’s hit that ROMAN’S SLEEPING chant! Still one of my favorites because the fans just will not give him a break no matter what. An enziguri staggers AJ on top and now it’s WAKE UP ROMAN. Reigns does in fact wake up and saves Rollins from a hanging DDT on the floor.

With Orton down, it seems as good a time as any for a DoubleBomb. Styles makes a save before it can be loaded up but here’s Ambrose to jump Styles again. The fans call Dean a STUPID IDIOT as the former Shield beats up security. NOW the TripleBomb puts AJ through the table, allowing Rollins to get the pin at 47:00. It’s down to two on two with the Wyatts vs. the Shield (not the worst idea in the world)….and here’s Luke Harper for a distraction so the Wyatts can take over.

Reigns posts Orton but Harper superkicks him down, only to have Rollins score with a flip dive to the floor. Back in and the low superkick hits Wyatt but he dives into an RKO, giving Bray the pin at 49:25. Reigns, all alone, sends both of them outside and takes Harper out as a bonus. Back in and Orton eats a spear to save Wyatt, leaving Bray to grab Sister Abigail for the pin at 52:50.

Rating: A. This is a great example of a match that benefits from all of the time it had. What I loved about this was how long it took to take someone out. Most of the people in here were former World Champions and it doesn’t make sense to have them losing in a minute or two like in the other matches. They let the match build up for a change and that’s what makes this feel important.

Above all else though, this felt like someone surviving instead of whoever was left last. Look at the women’s match. Bayley barely looked like she had been through anything at the end. Orton and Wyatt looked banged up, which is how they should after a match like this. It’s a well put together match that got the kind of time it needed, which is exactly how something like this should be. Really strong stuff here with Bray, who actually needed it, getting the win.

We recap Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar. Goldberg was being interviewed about being in WWE2K16 and said he didn’t owe Lesnar a rematch. Lesnar challenged him though and Goldberg wanted his son to see him wrestle. The match was on and it does indeed feel like a battle of two people who could kill each other.

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

We get the full Goldberg entrance, complete with someone knocking on his door. Lesnar drives him into the corner to start but Goldberg shoves him right back down, scaring the heck out of Lesnar in the process. Back up and the spear connects to drop Lesnar again. There’s a second spear, followed by a Jackhammer to give Goldberg the huge upset at 1:25.

Yeah I still don’t like it. Sure it was shocking and a huge moment, but what did this set up? Goldberg eliminating Lesnar from the Rumble, Goldberg getting the most unnecessary Universal Title reign ever, and then a good sub five minute match at Wrestlemania. One of WWE’s biggest issues is giving fans something to cheer for and they give this spot to Goldberg, who they didn’t even create, for the sake of a video game (might not have been their call) and a story that could have made someone’s career. After this, Samoa Joe and Braun Strowman both fell to Lesnar, but Goldberg doesn’t. I don’t buy it, nor to I like it.

Goldberg celebrates with his family to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. One of the major perks about a match running nearly an hour on a three and a half hour show is that it can REALLY bring an overall rating up. Throw in a good women’s match and nothing really bad, this is actually a strong show. It’s far from perfect (main event aside, though that was the only thing that could have closed the show) but it’s a heck of a card, which I can always go for of course. The main issue is they could have gotten this one under three hours so it’s a bit long but nothing too bad. Really solid show though and most of that is due to the mega long match.

Ratings Comparison

Rich Swann/Noam Dar/TJ Perkins vs. Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese/Drew Gulak

Original: C

Redo: C-

Kane vs. Luke Harper

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Women’s Survivor Series Match

Original: C

Redo: C+

Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Tag Team Survivor Series Match

Original: D+

Redo: B

Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Original: C

Redo: C-

Men’s Survivor Series Match

Original: A-

Redo: A

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: B+

My eyebrows went up when I saw the original overall rating. The year of mellowing on the ending have helped a lot as there’s no way this is a B-. Also I really couldn’t stand Sheamus and Cesaro back then.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/11/20/survivor-series-2016-there-are-no-words/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 2017
Date: January 29, 2017
Location: Alamodome, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 52,020
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

It’s kind of amazing how much this show has been forgotten in just about a year. Other than AJ Styles vs. John Cena, I can barely remember a single thing about this show. I know who won the Rumble and who were some of the bigger stars in the match but the rest is kind of a blur, which isn’t a good sign for what I’m in for here. Let’s get to it.

The aisle is crazy long and would require a cart to bring some of the wrestlers to the ring during the Rumble. There’s something cool about that, on both fronts actually.

Kickoff Show: Naomi/Nikki Bella/Becky Lynch vs. Alexa Bliss/Mickie James/Natalya

This would be the “throw all the Smackdown women into one match” match. Oh and dang I forgot how stupid the four person announcers’ booth on Smackdown was. It’s almost as stupid as having a 50,000 person dome and having a match an hour and a half before the show starts because THE PLACE IS FREAKING EMPTY! Like is anyone going to not watch this show on the Network if there isn’t a match going on the two hour pre-show?

This is mainly about Becky vs. James/Bliss and the rest are there because….well because the writers don’t know how to write singles matches for the women and still don’t do this day. For a secondary story, Natalya and Nikki are feuding because Natalya is jealous so she said that Cena will never marry Nikki. You know those are fighting words.

Nikki and Natalya start things off with Natalya doing You Can’t See Me. That means a slap to the face and there are so few people being so quiet that you can hear what the women are saying. Bliss comes in and gets caught with a facebuster for two. It’s off to Naomi for half of a double dropkick with Nikki’s part not even coming close. Nikki and company hit a triple suplex to send them outside, followed by a dive from Naomi as we take a break.

Back with Becky clotheslining Natalya and hitting a running forearm in the corner. They head outside with Mickie getting in a cheap shot to drop Becky, allowing Natalya to snap a suplex to really take over. Back in and Becky gets driven into the corner again, allowing Bliss to choke a bit. Mickie adds a hard kick to the face as the announcers argue over whether or not cheating is smart.

A Michinoku Driver plants Becky but Natalya can’t get Suplex City (Her words. Well Lesnar’s words, though JR said it about thirteen years earlier.). Instead it’s a double clothesline so Naomi can come in and clean house. The still dumb looking dancing kicks drop Bliss as everything breaks down. A kick to the head sets up the split legged moonsault to give Naomi the pin on Bliss at 9:39.

Rating: C-. The lack of a crowd either in their seats or really interested in this one hurt it a lot but the work wasn’t terrible. The women’s division had gotten so much better by this point that you could trust them to go out and have a match like this, though the stories need to be stronger. I’m really having an issue caring about Nikki never getting to marry her dream husband and complete her fairy tale story but I’m not exactly the target audience.*

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Sheamus/Cesaro vs. Anderson and Gallows

Sheamus and Cesaro are defending and there are two referees due to some screwy finishes as of late. The crowd is MUCH better now, making the place look like there’s an actual audience for the show. Cesaro dropkicks Anderson at the bell for two and a gutwrench suplex gets the same less than thirty seconds in.

Gallows loads up a cheap shot from the apron but the second referee catches him, making the gimmick actually work. Sheamus grabs a Regal Roll into Cesaro’s jumping double stomp for two more but Anderson is back up with a kick to the face to take over. It’s off to Gallows, who is quickly kicked down so the champs can take him into the corner. This has been mostly one sided so far but Gallows gets in a backdrop for a breather. Not that the fans seem to care for the most part though.

A big boot knocks Sheamus off the apron and we take a break. Back (after the commercial has been cut from the Network) with Cesaro suplexing Gallows and rolling over to bring Sheamus back in. The ten forearms to the chest have Gallows in trouble and a top rope clothesline gets two. Super White Noise gets the same but Gallows shoves Sheamus away and makes the hot tag to Anderson.

The second referee won’t allow some cheating so Swiss Death gives Cesaro two. A 619 and a high crossbody give him the same but Anderson kicks him down again. Sheamus breaks up the Magic Killer and a referee eats a Brogue Kick. The second referee comes in to see Cesaro put Anderson in the Sharpshooter, only to have Gallows break it up with a kick to the face. Everything breaks down again and it’s a Magic Killer for Sheamus, followed by a rollup with tights to pin Cesaro at 10:28.

Rating: C+. Nice power fight here with both teams hitting each other rather hard. That’s all this needed to be, though I could go for adding a different style in there. Power vs. power isn’t going to work all that well in the long term but at least they had a good match here. These title changes didn’t really matter though as it was all going to change when the Hardys came back. No one knew that yet though and at least we had something good here.

Kickoff Show: Nia Jax vs. Sasha Banks

Nia injured her a month or so ago and tonight is about revenge. Sasha doesn’t have her knee brace on as Nia drives her into the ropes and easily shoves off a headlock. A rope walk springboard goes just as badly as Banks can’t get anything going early on. Jax runs her over and we take an early break.

Back with Sasha trying a standing Bank Statement and having it broken up with ease. Jax grabs a Brock Lock and swings Banks around until a rope can be grabbed. Sasha finally avoids a charge to send Jax into the post, followed by the top rope double knees for two. Sasha comes up holding her knee though and the pop up Samoan drop puts her away at 5:13.

Rating: D+. This was just a step above a squash and really only served to keep Nia around. Banks is going to be fine after a loss like this while Nia still doesn’t have the big defining win (which would still be the case a year later). There was no need for this to be on pay per view though and it could have easily been done on Raw. That’s never a good sign.

And now, a nearly four hour show. I know I say this a lot but I’m almost gassed just watching that Kickoff Show. There’s really no need to do it this way, especially when you have the horrible empty stadium for the first match.

Completely standard opening video, though they do play in the cool “Remember the Rumble” tagline to show off a lot of the famous clips. If there’s one thing WWE does well, it’s look back at their own history. The rest of the matches get some time as well with each one having something to remember as well.

Raw Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Charlotte

Charlotte is defending and still has never lost a singles match on pay per view. Bayley gets wrestled down to start as Charlotte grabs a front facelock. The fans seem split here despite giving Bayley a heck of a reaction on her entrance. Charlotte heads outside for no apparent reason, allowing Bayley to grab her by the hair and snap her over the middle rope (basically a Stunner) to take over. A headscissors gets two and it’s already time to hit the stalling.

Bayley makes the mistake of going outside and gets kicked into the steps as she doesn’t have much of an answer for Charlotte’s power game. Back in and Charlotte slams Bayley’s face into the mat a few times but makes sure to throw in a quick pose (that’s the Flair in her). We hit the chinlock with Charlotte’s hair falling over Bayley’s face, giving us a rather odd visual of Bayley as a blonde. A knee drop gets two on Bayley and Charlotte is getting annoyed at Bayley sticking around.

Yet another kickout off a neckbreaker makes the frustration even worse so Charlotte does her figure four necklock into the face plants on the mat. The flips to send Bayley back first into the mat make it even worse as Charlotte is completely dominant so far. Charlotte stops to mock Bayley though and a heck of a slap cuts the champ off. A battle of the chops goes to Charlotte (well duh) but Bayley bounces out of the corner with an armdrag. A springboard crossbody (with a few too many bounces) drops Charlotte again and a jumping spinning Downward Spiral (not bad) does it again.

The top rope elbow (which looked awesome on impact) gets a very close two and you can feel the crowd breathe on the kickout. Charlotte (who might be bleeding from the mouth) kicks the knee out though and the Figure Four goes on. The referee catches her grabbing the ropes though and both women are down. Charlotte is up first but her moonsault only grazes knees to give Bayley two. Bayley goes up but gets shoved off to the floor in a heap. As she gets back in, Natural Selection onto the apron retains the title at 13:01.

Rating: B-. Bayley was fighting here but came up short, which is exactly how her character needs to go. For some reason WWE didn’t quite get this and instead put the title on her two weeks later in a nothing Raw match, ignoring the idea of building her up as an underdog. Charlotte was her usual awesome self here and that makes for a fun match, though the future didn’t go the way it should have. At least the first match was solid though.

The shark cage is lowered. This might require an explanation.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Roman Reigns had come close to taking the title from Kevin Owens but Chris Jericho interfered to cost Reigns the match. Therefore it’s time for a rematch with Jericho in a one man cage (the shark cage) above the ring. Jericho is of course scared of heights so this should be fun. It would be a better idea if they hadn’t done it in NXT not too long before this.

Raw World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is defending and this is No DQ. Jericho takes his sweet time getting into the cage (as he should) and is still not in even when Reigns comes out. The Canadians try some double teaming and knock Reigns into the cage all, only to have Reigns fight them off (and the fans are really, REALLY not pleased) and send Jericho into the cage to get us going. The cage is raised like a sexy pinata (Jericho’s very accurate term for himself) and Owens jumps Reigns from behind.

They waste no time in fighting out to the floor and then into the crowd with Reigns hitting him in the ribs with a metal stand. Back to ringside with Owens being bounced off the German announcers’ table but coming back with a whip into the steps. Owens pulls six chairs from underneath the ring and sets up four at ringside, two by two. A monitor shot to the ribs sets up the Cannonball against the barricade and Owens continues to be over like free beer in a frat house.

With Reigns down, Owens sets up two more chairs on top of the four he already had. One more is placed on top but of course the powerbomb and suplex attempts don’t work to prevent a broken back. Back in and Reigns sends him shoulder first into the post before loading up a table. That’s enough to make the fans cheer Reigns (I’m as shocked as you are) but a Backstabber gives Owens two.

Another Cannonball, with Owens mocking Reigns’ spear pose, is countered into a powerbomb. The apron dropkick rocks the champ again as this has been better than I was expecting so far. They’re beating each other up quite well and it’s pretty entertaining, despite Jericho being a non-factor so far. They head outside with Reigns getting superkicked onto a table, setting up a frog splash from the top to the floor in a big crash.

That’s only good for two (well duh) so Owens dedicates a chair shot to Jericho and gets another near fall. A chair is wedged into the corner because wrestlers never learn a thing. Owens scores with a superkick and manages to send Reigns into the chair as I’m not sure what to think. It’s not like that’s never worked before but it’s about as rare as Jericho eating crab cakes and goat’s milk.

With that not working, Jericho tosses Owens some brass knuckles but Reigns blocks the Superman Punch. Roman’s Superman Punch gets two and a Samoan drop through the chair is good for the same. You would think being driven THROUGH A CHAIR would be a big time match but since this is modern wrestling, something that big is now just a regular move. It’s the price you pay for all the big spots and violence.

Roman puts another table in the corner before another Superman Punch gets two. A spear is countered into a Stunner of all things but Reigns kicks out again. We continue the Austin homage with a mudhole stomping and a Cannonball (not so much Austin) as Owens is getting frustrated. That makes him do something dumb, like trying a superplex through that pile of chairs.

Reigns breaks that up and Superman Punches Owens through the pile instead for a very loud crash. A powerbomb puts Reigns through the announcers’ table but here’s Braun Strowman to beat the heck out of Reigns. Roman is sent into the post, followed by the running powerslam through the table in the corner to retain Owens’ title at 23:27.

Rating: B+. This was better than I was expecting and while it feels like a similar ending to Randy Orton vs. John Cena from Royal Rumble 2015, it’s still a good way to keep the title on Owens for the time being. They had a very good power brawl and Owens retaining is the right move, especially with the feud with Strowman getting a big boost. Jericho was barely a factor and that’s a good thing given that they were about to split in the near future.

To really fill in time, we’re doing a countdown of the thirty greatest moments in Rumble history, starting with 30-16 (or 30-15 as Cole puts it). Well kind of as the list is actually 30 facts, which is kind of Rumble By The Numbers.

30. Bret Hart was the first entrant

29. 870 people have entered

28. 3 women have entered and each has eliminated at least one man

27. 23 people have won, meaning 98% of the entrants are losers

26. 4 Rumbles have been in Texas

25. California and Florida have held 5 Rumbles each

24. 507,102 fans have seen the Rumble

23. Rey Mysterio lasted longer than anyone ever at 1:02:12

22. Edge won the Rumble in 7:37

21. Santino Marella was eliminated in 1 second

20. The longest time in a single Rumble without winning is Bob Backlund with 1:01:10

19. HHH has spent the most time in the Rumble with 4:06:08.

18. 46 Hall of Famers have competed

17. 9 Hall of Famers have won

16. Mick Foley entered the Rumble 3 times in 1998

Raw boss Stephanie McMahon mocks Raw underling Mick for Strowman interfering when Smackdown bosses Shane McMahon and Daniel Bryan come in. They roll the tumbler so Sami Zayn can come in and pick his number, which of course takes some time. Before Sami can open his ball, Dean Ambrose comes in searching for churros. He gets a number but is off to take a nap until he’s due in the Rumble. After going to a crowd shot of watching this in the arena (erg), Sami gets #8.

Austin Aries joins commentary for the Cruiserweight Title match.

We recap Rich Swann vs. Neville. Swann is the Cruiserweight Champion but Neville has declared himself the King of the Cruiserweights. That’s completely accurate and it’s time for Swann to take a heck of a beating and give up a title that doesn’t belong to him. This is about as obvious of an ending as you’re going to get. They throw in some history between the two with Neville mentoring Swann both in Japan and here in America. That’s better than nothing and more than I would expect from a match like this, even if Neville winning is pretty much guaranteed.

Cruiserweight Title: Neville vs. Rich Swann

Neville is challenging and stops himself from doing his usual entrance because the fans don’t deserve it. That’s a nice touch and makes him feel different instead of the same guy who just happens to be a villain now. Feeling out process to start until Swann flips over Neville and misses a dropkick.

Neville gets sent outside for a dive but is fine enough to drive Swann right into the corner. A missile dropkick sets up a jackknife cover for two and Neville stands on Swann’s head. Neville wants to know if this is it and gets crucifixed for two. Back up and Neville forearms the heck out of Swann for two more and we’re off to the chinlock. The comeback is enough to have Neville take him outside for some whips into the barricade.

Back in and Neville comes up the top, diving straight into a superkick to the jaw. That one looked awesome and both guys are down. Another kick to the jaw and a super hurricanrana sets up a Phoenix flip dive to the floor to put Neville in trouble. They head back inside with Swann hammering away before getting two off something like a Warrior splash.

Neville isn’t down enough that he can’t crotch Swann on top. He also can’t hit the superplex but settles for a hard superkick to stagger the champ. Rich’s spinning kick to the head gets two as Neville gets his foot on the ropes. Swann again takes too long to get up top, allowing Neville to superplex him into the Rings of Saturn for the tap to make Neville champion at 13:29.

Rating: B-. They were beating the heck out of each other in a better than average match. Instead of having Neville squash him in relatively short order, Swann got in some offense, only to eventually not be good enough to overcome the King of the Cruiserweights. This was entertaining, but Neville is going to need some better challengers.

We recap AJ Styles vs. John Cena. Styles defeated Cena twice in a row last year, including with one clean pinfall. Then Cena said he wanted to challenge the champion at the Rumble and since he’s John Cena and one title shy of tying Ric Flair’s record, the match was made.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging and has the black shorts on here so you know it’s a big night. AJ scores with a kick to the leg so Cena clotheslines him to the apron. Cena gets in a few right hands but charges into a boot in the corner to let AJ take over. Back to back knee drops have Cena in trouble but AJ stops to yell at the crowd. A third knee, this time with a You Can’t See Me, misses and Cena is right back with a backdrop.

AJ sticks the landing on an AA though and there’s an enziguri to put Cena down again. There’s a hurricanrana and Cena doesn’t seem to know what to do with Styles. The running seated forearm gives AJ two more but Cena punches him in the face. The Shuffle is broken up though and AJ grabs a wheelbarrow facebuster to put Cena down again. AJ hits the Phenomenal Blitz, only to have Cena hit that hard running clothesline for a breather that he uses when he needs a breather.

Now the Shuffle connects but it’s way too early for the AA. AJ grabs a torture rack into a spinning powerbomb for two more and we get a bit of a pause. They’re doing a good job here of going with the slower pace to build things up here, which is exactly what they should be doing.

The Phenomenal Forearm misses and it’s an AA for two. Another hard running clothesline gives Cena two more but he charges into a Pele to the shoulder. Now the Forearm connects for two more as they’re even in the near falls off the finishers. AJ starts firing off the hard kicks to the chest and Cena doesn’t seem like he’s breathing very well. One too many kicks earns him an electric chair into a faceplant though and Cena is right back into it.

They slug it out with JBL describing AJ as blocking every punch with his face. Apparently that’s fine enough to reverse a right hand into the Calf Crusher but of course Cena reverses into the STF to a nice round of applause. At least they respect some wrestling abilities. Somehow AJ reverses that into an STF of his own but Cena powers to his feet. Instead of an AA though, it’s off to a Figure Four on the champ (because we must praise Flair, though it’s appropriate here).

AJ pulls himself up though and tries a cross armbreaker, which of course is countered into a powerbomb for two. Cena goes up top for the Fameasser but gets powerbombed out of the air. Now the Styles Clash is good for two as the fans are feeling the near falls (as they should with the match picking WAY up in a hurry). Code Red gives Cena two more, followed by AJ’s fireman’s carry backbreaker for the same.

Something like a swinging Big Ending (called a cutter by Mauro) gives Cena two more so it’s time for the big guns. Cena busts out the super AA…….for two. You can see the look of disbelief on Cena’s face and now the fans aren’t sure what to think. The Styles Clash gives AJ his own near fall but Cena counters the Phenomenal Forearm into back to back AA’s for the pin and the title at 24:01.

Rating: A. This took its time to build up and it’s one of the best matches of 2017. Cena using raw power to start but eventually learning what AJ was going to throw at him and adapting made for a great story. He couldn’t win with the mega power move either, eventually having to counter AJ to beat him. That builds on their previous matches and it’s a classic match as a result.

Cena celebrates. JBL: “Man that was good!” Yeah pretty much. Cena heads into the crowd and hands the title to a Make-A-Wish kid because he’s that awesome.

We look at Seth Rollins invading Takeover: San Antonio to call out HHH, who cost him his spot in the Rumble. HHH said Rollins needs to be careful what he wished for. Worry not though as STEPHANIE will be on Raw tomorrow night to deal with Rollins. I’d be terrified too.

Jerry Lawler comes out for commentary on the Rumble.

Back to the Rumble by the Numbers.

15. Only 16 of the 30 possible numbers have won

14. 7 winners are from 1-10

13. 4 have been from 11-20

12. 19 have been from 21-40

11. 27 is the lucky number

10. 1 and 2 have produced 4 winners

9. 1 and 2 have been the final two entrants twice (1995 and 1999)

8. Only one person has won from the same number twice (Batista at #28)

7. Kane has entered the most Royal Rumbles

6. Kane has the most career eliminations

5. Roman Reigns has the most eliminations in one match

4. The World Title has been on the line twice

3. Three men have been runner up twice (Cena, Big Show, HHH)

2. Five men have won twice (Cena, HHH, Hogan, Shawn Michaels, Batista)

1. Only Steve Austin has won three Rumbles

Royal Rumble

Two minutes intervals and it’s Big Cass in at #1, meaning Enzo Amore gets to do the full entrance. We’re just that lucky I guess but the fans are still eating it up at this point. Since everything is bigger in Texas, it would make sense for Big Cass to win here tonight. We hear about some of the bigger names but Cass is going to toss all of them out because Cass is like HBK in 1995. Chris Jericho is in at #2 as his bad luck in the Rumble draws continue (this is his third time as #2).

Cass tosses him down with a fall away slam but an early Empire Elbow misses. The Walls are broken up and it’s Kalisto in at #3 after only ninety seconds. A springboard dropkick staggers Cass and a regular one drops Jericho. Cass can’t powerslam Kalisto and it’s some kicks to cut Cass down again. Mojo Rawley is in at #4 as we’re not even three minutes and fifteen seconds in yet. Corey: “Smackdown Live’s resident blithering idiot.” Lawler: “That’s an insult to blithering idiots”.

Cass takes Rawley into the corner while the other two are down on the apron. Jericho breaks four hours in the Rumble to give him the all time record as Jack Gallagher is in at #5. The length of the aisle really becomes an issue here as Jack takes forever to get to the ring. Once there though he cleans house with the umbrella, including a low blow to a posing Jericho. One heck of a toss sends Kalisto to the mat and it’s Mark Henry in at #6.

Everyone is down when his music hits but Gallagher has enough time to get up and stomp on Jericho by the time he gets there. Gallagher’s headbutt just annoys Mark so he tosses Jack through the ropes (not an elimination). Jack does his Mary Poppins dive with the umbrella and is promptly eliminated. Braun Strowman is in at #7, taking twenty five seconds from the start of his music to get to the ring. Jericho hides on the floor (Jericho: “HE’S HUGE!”) as Strowman gets rid of Mojo, Cass, Kalisto and Henry, the latter after a battle of the giants.

Sami Zayn is in at #8 and is stupid enough to charge into the ring and slug away as fast as he can. Sami stops a charge with a boot but tries a suplex for some reason. Strowman misses a charge into the post but comes right back with a running splash in the corner as Big Show is #9 (to a VERY strong reaction, oddly enough).

We get the big, long walk to the ring where Sami is down in the corner and Jericho is still on the floor. Strowman clotheslines Show down without much effort but a chokeslam cuts him down. Jericho picks now to come back in and is promptly punched down, leaving the giants to lift each other up for failed slam attempts. Strowman manages to muscle Show out though and is the only one standing. The debuting Tye Dillinger is #10 (in the perfect (ten) entrance), giving us Jericho, Strowman, Zayn and Dillinger. Tye goes straight at Strowman with forearms and left hands as Sami gets up to help him slug away at the giant.

They get suplexed down without much effort though and it’s James Ellsworth in at #11. He and Carmella run to the ring (in a relationship that was never explained) but don’t get in, allowing Tye and Sami to pull Strowman to the apron. Dean Ambrose is in at #12 and tricks Ellsworth into charging in on his own where Strowman eliminates him in all of ten seconds. That’s better than I was expecting. Dean gets in but can’t do much with Strowman (well duh) but Tye and Sami get back up to help Dean out. That earns them all running clotheslines in the corner and it’s Baron Corbin in at #13.

That means four on one on Strowman, who shrugs them all away. Strowman dumps Tye but Sami grabs him by the beard for a breather. A Helluva Kick rocks Strowman and Corbin gets rid of the monster after a star making performance. Dean hits a quick Dirty Deeds on Corbin but doesn’t try to eliminate him. Dean never was the smartest guy in the world.

Kofi Kingston is in at #14 and the countdown is on to the cool save. Kofi gets knocked into the ropes and Corbin does his slide underneath the ropes into a clothesline on Dean. The Miz is in at #15 (thankfully with Maryse), giving us Jericho (STILL on the floor), Sami, Ambrose, Corbin and Miz at the moment.

A Skull Crushing Finale drops Dean but Miz doesn’t go for the elimination. Deep Six cuts Miz off as the crowd oddly dies for a bit. For no logical reason, Kofi climbs to the top of the post but gets knocked down onto his chest. He still manages to hang on though and scores with Trouble in Paradise on Corbin. Sheamus is in at #16 and it’s time for some powerslams. Miz backs away from Sheamus but gets caught in the ten forearms to the chest. Jericho gets back up and is promptly Brogue Kicked down.

Big E. is in at #17 and it’s a quick abdominal stretch on Miz, allowing for some spanking. If that’s what he’s into I guess. The ring is getting too full and Rusev (with a broken nose) makes it even worse at #18. Right hands have Dean in trouble but no one is seriously close to being eliminated.

Sheamus gets in a hard knee on Miz and it’s Cesaro in at #19. It’s an early Swing to Miz and a second to Sami. Jerry: “Use him as a weapon!” Ambrose and Kofi are swung as well, followed by Big E. and Corbin but Rusev saves Sheamus from the same fate for some reason. You might notice a lot of names being swung and that’s because there are WAY too many people in the ring.

Xavier Woods is in at #20, giving us Jericho, Zayn, Ambrose, Corbin, Kingston, Miz, Sheamus, Big E. Rusev, Cesaro and Woods. We’re two thirds of the way into the match and over half of the people are still in. New Day beats Sheamus up and Woods has to save Kofi from an elimination at Miz’s hands. A pair of boots rock Miz but he’s not going anywhere yet. Bray Wyatt, with the lights going out, is in at #21 and the Fireflies coming out during the match is a cool visual.

Miz gets the release Rock Bottom and house is cleaned until Woods stares Wyatt down in a call back to Woods being terrified of Bray. Woods is sent to the apron and Kofi is put there next to him. Big E. saves his buddies from Cesaro and Sheamus as Apollo Crews is in at #22. Crews’ standing moonsault hits Miz as this is looking like a regular battle royal rather than the Rumble. Big E. pulls Woods and Kofi back inside but Sheamus and Cesaro get rid of all three of them at once to let the ring breathe a bit. Sheamus tries to dump Cesaro but Jericho runs in to get rid of both of them. Well the ring is certainly emptier in a hurry.

Randy Orton (of the Wyatt Family because reasons) is in at #23 with a quick RKO to Corbin and Rusev. Sami goes up top for some reason and dives right into another RKO. Dolph Ziggler is in at #24 and superkicks abound. The fans are begging for Goldberg to come in and get rid of some of these people but have to settle for Luke Harper at #25. We have five spots left and Goldberg, Undertaker and Brock Lesnar still to go. Harper gets rid of Crews but stops for a staredown with Orton. Wyatt has to play peacekeeper until Harper clotheslines Bray down. Orton breaks up Sister Abigail on Bray with an RKO as the ring is too full again.

Brock Lesnar is in at #26 and now we can get rid of some people. Ziggler and Ambrose are tossed with ease and it’s Suplex/F5 City. Everyone is down and the fans want Goldberg at #27. Instead it’s Enzo Amore in at #27 and I’ll let you figure out what happens. Graves: “THIS MAY BE THE GREATEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE!!!” Brock throws some suplexes until Goldberg is in at #28 for the big showdown. A spear and a clothesline get rid of Lesnar in all of fifteen seconds, stunning both the crowd and commentary at once. Sami eats a Jackhammer and Orton/Wyatt take a double spear.

Goldberg is the only man standing and it’s Undertaker in at #29 to a ROAR. Thankfully he appears in the ring instead of doing the ridiculously long walk down the ramp. Cole: “THIS IS A MOMENT!” Well those are what matter more than anything else. Corbin and Rusev break up the showdown and are promptly eliminated. A spear takes Undertaker down but Goldberg turns his attention to eliminate Harper, allowing Undertaker to dump him. Undertaker chokeslams a few people and it’s Roman Reigns at #30 (imagine the booing) to give us Jericho, Sami, Miz, Wyatt, Orton, Undertaker and Reigns.

That means another staredown and Reigns wins the slugout. The fans are LIVID and call this BS until Undertaker stops the Superman Punch with a chokeslam. Undertaker dumps Miz and Zayn like they’re nothing but takes too long calling for a Tombstone, allowing Reigns to dump him. That earns Reigns a glare to set up the Wrestlemania main event.

Jericho is dead so Reigns tosses him without much effort, giving Jericho the most meaningless hour run in Rumble history. Reigns is left alone with Orton and Wyatt with the double teaming starting in short order. The hanging DDT plants Reigns but Superman Punches get Roman out of trouble. Wyatt is eliminated but it’s an RKO and a clothesline to send Orton to Wrestlemania at 1:02:08.

Rating: D. And that’s being pretty generous. There are tons of problems here, but we’ll start with all the midcarders who were around forever and did nothing. Here are some of the people who weren’t going to win but were in the match for at least twenty minutes each:

Sami Zayn (47:12)

Dean Ambrose (26:55)

Baron Corbin (32:39)

Miz (32:44)

Rusev (22:31)

Those five names combined for one elimination. That’s a crazy amount of time to basically do nothing. If they’re not going to be factors (and none of them were as they were almost all glorified cannon fodder), don’t leave them out there go clog up the ring. It doesn’t do Sami any good to be out there for forty five minutes and do nothing, just like it doesn’t help Miz to be there for half an hour so people can beat on him. Jericho was a potential winner and stayed in there over an hour (spending a lot of it on the floor) but what good is an hour stay if he’s tossed out like he’s nothing after a mere two eliminations?

That brings us to the second problem: the three big names. This match was built around Goldberg, Brock Lesnar and Undertaker (the three of them and Cena are dead center on the post) and they combined to get rid of TEN people (over a third of the eliminations) despite being in the match for less time combined than any of the five names mentioned above. None of them made the final four but they cleared the way for the grouping. That’s some really bad planning and a lack of drama, especially when it makes everyone left look life afterthoughts. Let one of them be there as a dragon for the winner to slay at the very least.

Throw in a lack of meaningful surprises (Reigns was the only name of value not announced in advance) and no nostalgia to be seen (but we needed Apollo Crews and Dolph Ziggler to combine for ten minutes in the ring and not get rid of anyone) and there was very little to care about for the biggest part of the Rumble. Strowman stuff was fun, but after him there was a FIFTEEN MINUTE stretch with no eliminations. This was a terribly planned out Rumble and managed to turn one of the most entertaining matches of the year into something incredibly boring.

Overall Rating: C+. It says a lot when the Royal Rumble is the only bad thing on the show. Other than that, the worst match is…..I guess the women’s match? This show was rather awesome but the Rumble itself was such a mess that it brings the rest of the show way down. This was a good show that cold have been great and I have no idea how they thought that was the right idea with the Rumble. That should usually be the most important thing on the show but it felt like something they threw together here, which really misses the point. Fix the Rumble and it’s a classic. As it is, it’s just good.

Ratings Comparison

Naomi/Nikki Bella/Becky Lynch vs. Alexa Bliss/Mickie James/Natalya

Original: C

Redo: C-

Sheamus and Cesaro vs. Anderson and Gallows

Original: D+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Sasha Banks

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Bayley vs. Charlotte Flair

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Kevin Owens vs. Roman Reigns

Original: B

Redo: B+

Rich Swann vs. Neville

Original: C+

Redo: B-

John Cena vs. AJ Styles

Original: A-

Redo: A

Royal Rumble

Original: C+

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B+

Redo: C+

That Rumble rating is ridiculous. Most of the rest of the matches are in the same ballpark though and that’s a good thing.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/29/royal-rumble-2017-i-can-go-with-that/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: July 3, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Corey Graves, Michael Cole

Things should be a bit more back to normal this week as we won’t be having the big Undertaker tribute taking up half of the show. Instead, we’ll be seeing Sheamus toast Jeff Hardy and AJ Styles defending the Intercontinental Title against Drew Gulak, both of which were originally scheduled for last week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Michael Cole is in the ring and brings out Matt Riddle for a chat. Cole asks Riddle about coming here and if he can explain what it means to beat AJ Styles. Riddle: “Uh, not really.” Riddle talks about how he could get used to facing people like AJ Styles and having success in NXT and here on Smackdown. As for the bare feet, it comes from when he was a kid and went on vacation to Wisconsin. He would play in the snow then get in the indoor pool. One day he did it a little too long and got frostbite on his feet.

It was so bad that he almost lost his toes and wearing shoes gives him that same weird feeling. So he doesn’t wear shoes no matter what he’s doing, whether it’s going to a wedding or hanging out with a bear. Cue King Corbin to say that story was a waste of time and to send Cole back to commentary. Riddle can’t carry his crown and no one wants him here. Riddle: “You do you bro.” Corbin: “WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN???”. The challenge is on but Corbin says he has something else in mind.

Matt Riddle vs. John Morrison

Miz is at ringside, Corbin is on commentary and Riddle kicks his shoes at him to start. Morrison takes him down to start but Riddle grabs the leg, sending Morrison over to the leg. As Corbin makes Fast Times At Ridgemont High references, Morrison hits such a loud forearm that commentary stops to gasp at the noise. Riddle shrugs it off and rolls some gutwrench suplexes but Morrison grabs an Alabama slam.

An ankle lock has Riddle in trouble but Morrison slips out and hits another loud Flying Chuck. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Morrison goes with a springboard spinning crossbody for two. Morrison’s running knee gets the same and Riddle says hit him again, only to have Morrison thumb him in the eye. Riddle gets sent outside, where he throws a flip flop at Corbin as we take a break.

Back with the two of them slugging it out until Riddle hits a Broton into the Bro To Sleep for two. The Floating Bro hits knees though and Morrison gets frustrated at the kickout. Riddle grabs a rear naked choke (which may be the new Bromission) but Morrison gets up and makes it to the corner.

Riddle gets up top but gets caught in a super Spanish Fly, followed by a regular Spanish Fly for two more. Back up and Riddle wins the slugout but Morrison scores with a dropkick. That doesn’t have much effect though as Riddle hits a powerbomb into the Final Flash for two. With that not working, Riddle reverses a small package into one of his own for the pin at 15:04.

Rating: B-. It was a good back and forth match with Riddle pulling out a hard fought win, but how interesting can it be if we’re just getting ready for a Corbin vs. Riddle showdown? The Corbin involvement has an amazing ability to suck the life out of anything and that isn’t changing for Riddle. I can’t imagine Riddle has any serious problem beating him, but it feels like something we’re getting through instead of something that actually matters.

Post match it’s AJ Styles running in to beat on Riddle, with Drew Gulak making the save as Miz, Morrison and Corbin watch.

Post break, Miz and Morrison aren’t happy but Corbin has an idea on how to take care of Riddle.

Intercontinental Title: AJ Styles vs. Drew Gulak

Gulak is challenging and in the red white and blue trunks for the 4^th of July. Or maybe an Apollo Creed/Rocky Balboa deal. Neither gets an entrance after the previous segment, which feels a little more realistic for a change. They start fast with AJ hammering away in the corner and on the mat as Daniel Bryan drops in via picture in picture to say Gulak is looking good. AJ’s chinlock doesn’t last long so he hammers away in the corner as Bryan talks about how few holes AJ has in his game.

Bryan says Gulak can hang in there though, as he showed when he was “205 Live Champion”. Gulak fires back with some forearms but AJ takes him down with the dragon screw legwhip. AJ starts in on the leg as you can see what looks like “Havoc” written on Gulak’s wrist tape. Hopefully in October. The Calf Crusher is countered into a kind of Crossface, sending AJ over to the rope. Frustration sets in and Gulak dropkicking him through the ropes makes it worse.

Back from a break with AJ getting two off a brainbuster and going after Gulak’s eyes. Gulak sends him hard into the corner but AJ snaps the throat across the top. As Bryan says he would never count Gulak out, we hit the chinlock to keep Gulak down. Graves: “What’s that river in Washington Cole? Denial?” Cole: “The Nile is actually in Egypt.”

As the air goes out of the room on that one, Gulak gets in Snake Eyes in the corner and some dropkicks to stagger AJ some more. The Falcon Arrow gets two but AJ slips out of the superplex attempt. AJ powerbombs him out of the corner into the Styles Clash for no cover. The Phenomenal Forearm retains at 17:02.

Rating: B-. Another good, back and forth match here though I’m not sure how much of a reason there was to believe Gulak had a chance. You can probably pencil in another Bryan vs. Styles match at Extreme Rules and then Riddle waiting on the winner at Summerslam, which sounds like a good use of the next seven or so weeks. Just let AJ and Bryan do something every other week on Smackdown and they’ll be fine for a long time.

Here are Sasha Banks and Bayley for a chat. They brag about how they’re on all three shows but no one has been showing them any respect. The only people who care about them is the Undertaker, or Taker as Bayley likes to call him. He called Bayley last week and said he was embarrassed by all of the tributes Smackdown gave him last week when Bayley Dos Straps is the greatest champion in WWE history. Undertaker wants Bayley and Banks to win all the titles at Extreme Rules and thinks they should get their own tribute this week.

We aren’t waiting any longer so here is said tribute, as made by Bayley and Banks and set to a song about doing it for the glory. Banks talks about Bayley’s Grand Slam and how the closest anyone is getting to that is going to Denny’s. Back in the arena, they chant thanks to each other but here are Nikki Cross and Alexa Bliss to interrupt.

They have a presentation of their own, with various interesting facts about each other (Cross is 325^th in line to the throne of England and Bliss drove across Antarctica in a go kart). They get in the ring and Cross says she can win the title. Bliss slaps Bayley down so Banks makes the Bliss vs. Bayley match for right now.

Bayley vs. Alexa Bliss

Non-title with Cross and Banks at ringside. Bayley, in street clothes, is taken down to start and Bliss pokes her in the nose. Back up and Bayley sends her into the corner but what looked like a Twist of Fate over the ropes is broken up. Back in and Bayley goes after the arm, including snapping it over her shoulder a few times.

The armbar goes on for a bit until Bayley misses a stomp to the arm. Bliss gets in a shot to the face but Bayley is right back with a corner splash and a bulldog for two. Cross freaks out so Banks gets in a cheap shot, only to have Cross run Banks over. Bayley doesn’t like that so Cross decks her for the DQ at 5:23.

Rating: C-. That felt a lot longer than five and a half minutes as the arm work kept going, but it was a fine way for Bayley to be able to look dominant and talk down to Cross at the same time. I’m not sure how much of an interest there is going to be in seeing Bayley vs. Cross at the pay per view, but they need something to stretch it out until someone can give Bayley a real threat. How many times does that need to be the case though?

We get a special look at Braun Strowman vs. Bray Wyatt. Strowman met him in the swamp and became part of the Wyatt Family, and we hear some old school Wyatt “everything is evil” narration. Strowman liked being Bray’s horseman but has managed to lock that side of himself away. Bray wants to take a step back and destroy what he created, but Strowman wants to drown Bray in his own swamp. A lot of laughter ensues. Still not caring in the slightest and the amount of time this build is getting is starting to rival how long Strowman actually spent with Wyatt.

Kofi Kingston vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Big E. and Cesaro are here. Kofi dropkicks Nakamura into the corner to start and then knocks him to the apron. Another dropkick puts Nakamura on the floor but he moves before Kofi can dive. Back in and a Cesaro distraction lets Nakamura get in a kick to the head before choking on the ropes. Big E. goes after Cesaro on the floor and they’re both ejected as we take a break.

We come back with Nakamura hammering away before having to duck the Trouble in Paradise. A spinning kick to the head drops Kofi but he’s right back with the SOS for two. Kofi’s standing double stomp gets two but Trouble in Paradise is blocked. Nakamura can’t get a sleeper so it’s a running knee to the head to finish Kofi at 11:50.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of match that is going to work well every time given who was in there. You can all but guarantee a title match between the teams at Extreme Rules and I’ll certainly take that over the horror show that it would have been to see the Forgotten Sons try to be interesting. I would still prefer Nakamura or Cesaro getting a one off World Title shot than someone like Dolph Ziggler, but that’s not how WWE works.

Post match Cesaro is back to load up a table but Big E. runs out for the save.

The Tag Team Title match is set for next week.

Here’s Jeff Hardy for the big toast, meaning there is a big bar full of liquor in the ring and a bartender. Sheamus pops up on screen at his own bar though, saying he wanted to let Jeff blow off some steam. Last week, Jeff got to stand up for Undertaker but it was just another quick fix like Jeff always needs. Sheamus talks about all of the rehab costing Jeff money and respect, but the real problem is facing reality.

Hardy has felt sorry for himself since losing at Backlash and now Hardy has been trying to stick his nose in someone else’s business. This is going to be different though right? This time Jeff isn’t going to be a giant disappointment. The truth is that Jeff is lying to himself and the solution is in one of those bottles. Here’s to a proper toast: may your troubles be less and your blessing be more, as you drink yourself blind and pass out on the floor. Your wife and kids cry when you enter her thoughts because your life has been nothing but a series of DUI’s and mugshots.

Jeff calls Sheamus the sickest man he has ever met and he can’t believe Sheamus would do this. Sheamus knows Jeff wants to jump back into the gutter with both feet, so the bartender offers him a glass. Sheamus says follow your instincts so Jeff takes the glass and asks what’s the worst that could happen. He puts the glass to his mouth and then pours it on the bartender’s head. Jeff breaks a bottle over the bartender’s head and hits a Swanton to end the show. This was uh, quite a lot and probably not their best idea.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was a great example of the wrestling working and everything else falling apart. The first two matches were both rather good TV matches and a great use of about 45 minutes. Then there were things like Strowman and Wyatt’s segment, the toast segment and Corbin’s….well mere existence really. It certainly had its moments and the first half is good, but dang you can tell they’re putting on whatever they can think of in some spots.

Results

Matt Riddle b. John Morrison – Small package

AJ Styles b. Drew Gulak – Phenomenal Forearm

Bayley b. Alexa Bliss via DQ when Nikki Cross interfered

Shinsuke Nakamura b. Kofi Kingston – Running knee to the head

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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