Monday Night Raw – July 11, 2022: The Anniversary Slowdown

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 11, 2022
Location: AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re well on the way to Summerslam and that means the card is mostly set. I’m curious to see what that means we are going to be seeing added to the show, as that can often be more interesting than seeing things built up even more. If nothing else, Brock Lesnar is here tonight so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap from Smackdown with Roman Reigns saying things pick up when the Big Dog comes around.

Here is Brock Lesnar to get things going. Brock says God bless Texas and even takes his hat off to show some manners. Reigns talks about how Roman Reigns has been living high on the hog and at Summerslam, the hog is being slaughtered, like Lesnar does on his ranch. Violence is promised, but here is Paul Heyman to interrupt. Lesnar: “Speak of the hog.” Heyman talks about how Lesnar is a monster, but the fans say Heyman sucks. Lesnar asks if Heyman is going to say anything worthwhile, sending Heyman into a rant about how this match plays into Lesnar’s hands.

We hear about how Lesnar is a killer and someone who will destroy everything. Reigns is approaching 700 days as Universal Champion and that is a streak Lesnar won’t break. Heyman will have Reigns ready, even if that means reaching up Lesnar’s a** and ripping out his heart. Lesnar isn’t sure what to make of that but here is Theory to interrupt. Theory promises to win the title at Summerslam, but Lesnar tells him to come down here and let’s do it right now.

We see a clip of Lesnar beating Theory up in the Elimination Chamber, which Theory says is what could happen to Reigns. It could happen to Lesnar too, and here is the Alpha Academy for a distraction. Chad Gable’s chop block just annoys him and the ring is cleared out with no trouble. Lesnar F5’s Otis through the announcers’ table for a bonus. And that’s how Brock Lesnar is used this week.

Rey Mysterio vs. Finn Balor

Damian Priest and Rey Mysterio are here too and before the match, Priest says that the Mysterios being attacked last week was one for the old guys. Now Rey has nothing to offer Dominik but an ugly mask and some old, tired tricks that aren’t even his. The offer is tossed out to join the Judgment Day again but Dominik turns them down. Balor points out what happens to people they don’t like and we see the beatdown on Edge from a few weeks ago. Balor calls Rey a bad father and the villains are cleared out without much trouble.

As for the actual match, we’re joined in progress after a break with Balor choking on the ropes until Rey is back with a kick to the floor. The big dive connects but Balor is back up with a backbreaker to take over again. Rey fights back but gets caught on top with a shot to the knee.

Said knee is fine enough to send Balor outside for a sliding sunset bomb into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Rey hitting a super hurricanrana for two, despite having one good leg. The 619 connects but Balor avoids the frog splash. Rey crucifixes him for two but Balor is back with something close to 1916. The Coup de Grace gives Balor the pin at 10:12.

Rating: C+. It wasn’t a great match but Balor vs. Rey is going to work just because of the two people involved. There is so much talent involved that it will be fine enough, which is about what we got here. What matters is continuing the story, which could mean the end of Dominik and that is a very promising world.

Post match Dominik checks on Rey as Judgment Day looks down at both of them.

Here is Becky Lynch before the Raw Women’s Title match. She gets on the announcers’ table and rants about how she should have gotten her rematch but didn’t have a shortcut like Liv Morgan or a title shot like Carmella is getting tonight. Lynch gets where she goes because she is that good and works that hard, so tonight she is DEMANDING the title shot at Summerslam.

Raw Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Carmella

Belair is defending and drives Carmella into the corner without much trouble to start. They go outside with Belair sending her into the corner, only to stop to yell at Lynch as we take a break. Back with Carmella grabbing a figure four necklock across the ropes. Carmella goes up, only to get pulled out of the air and caught with a delayed vertical suplex for two. The trade rollups for two each and Belair hits a double chickenwing facebuster.

Raised knees block the handspring moonsault though and Carmella rolls her up for two more. The low superkick is countered into a faceplant on the turnbuckle but the KOD is countered into an X Factor (nice) for another near fall. Belair is back with a clothesline, only to get caught with a spinebuster. Carmella low bridges her to the floor, where Carmella rakes her eyes. That earns her a posting and Belair throws her back inside. Cue Becky for the distraction so Belair gets counted out at 11:47.

Rating: C. Of course they did. Of course they did. Of course they have to keep Carmella in this spot, meaning she is probably going to get a title match at Summerslam out of all this stuff. I’m sure Becky vs. Bianca is coming, but it wouldn’t surprise me to see Carmella added somehow. Pretty good match here, but the result is pretty awful.

Post match Carmella holds up the title until Belair finally punches her in the chest. The KOD plants Carmella, because THIS FEUD MUST CONTINUE SINCE A CLEAN WIN MEANS NOTHING!

Here’s the same creepy vignette from the last few weeks.

We look back at Miz and Ciampa joining forces to beat down AJ Styles.

Here are Miz and Ciampa for MizTV. Ciampa wants to open eyes around here and Miz can help him do that better than anyone else. This sends Miz into a rant about Logan Paul, who has posted a video saying that he is still coming for Miz. That doesn’t work for Miz, who offers Paul one more chance to be his partner, or he’ll just team with Ciampa to win the titles.

Cue AJ Styles to say Miz has found someone to do his dirty work, which sounds like the actions of someone with…..Miz: “DON’T YOU DARE!” AJ calls him a coward….with tiny, tiny testicles. Styles clears the ring and here is Ezekiel to interrupt. His brother Elias talks about how Styles really is phenomenal. He was almost as insistent about that as he was about Miz having tiny testicles. Ezekiel has been talking to Adam Pearce and the scheduled handicap match is now going to be a tag match.

Ezekiel/AJ Styles vs. Ciampa/Miz

Joined in progress with Ciampa working on Ezekiel, who comes back with some shots to the face. Miz comes in and gets knocked down as well, meaning it’s back to Ciampa, who gets suplexed for his efforts. A cheap shot from the apron puts Ezekiel in trouble though and Ciampa sends him into the barricade, setting up the pat on the back.

We take a break and come back with Ezekiel fighting out of Ciampa’s chinlock and slugging his way out of trouble. The hot tag brings in Styles to clean house, including a gutbuster for two on Miz. The short DDT plants AJ but the fireman’s carry neckbreaker gives Styles two, with Ciampa making the save. AJ puts on the calf Crusher until Ciampa makes another save, this time hammering on Styles until it’s a DQ at 11:32.

Rating: C-. Well I guess it’s better than Ciampa taking another pin. I’m not sure how much better it is to have Ciampa in this team than in anything else but at least he has something to do. Still though, actually having him get a win that matters would be better, though I’m not sure if that is something that is actually going to happen. So call it an upgrade? Maybe?

Post match AJ hits Ciampa with the slingshot forearm to the floor as Miz bails.

Riddle talks to Bobby Lashley about their tag match with Seth Rollins and Theory later tonight. Before that, maybe they can watch Stranger Things together so Riddle doesn’t get scared! Lashley is going to go warm up instead.

Alexa Bliss/Asuka vs. Doudrop/Nikki Ash

Asuka knocks Ash down without much trouble to start and it’s off to Bliss for some rollups. Doudrop comes in off a blind tag though and runs Bliss over. Some forearms allow Ash to come back in for a quickly broken chinlock. Bliss avoids a charge in the corner, allowing Asuka to come back in and strike away at Doudrop. Asuka knees Ash out of the air and adds the sliding kick for two. Back in and Bliss hits her DDT to pin Ash at 4:12.

Rating: C-. The good thing here is that they didn’t have this go on too long, as there was little doubt about who was winning. Bliss has been on a roll since being back and Asuka is Asuka, meaning there isn’t much for Doudrop and Ash to do. This was one of those “get them on the show” matches and that’s fine for a short one.

We look back at the Street Profits getting a shoulder up against the Usos at Money In The Bank but losing anyway.

Jimmy Uso vs. Angelo Dawkins

Jey Uso and Montez Ford are here too. Before the match, the Usos brag about how great they are. This brings out the Street Profits to be rather serious and say that they’re going to win at Summerslam because they want the smoke. And now here’s R-Truth, to say he needs to serve as counselor here. That isn’t going to work for the Usos, unless R-Truth can be the referee for the Summerslam rematch.

Well……actually he is a certified WWE referee so he demonstrates refereeing abilities. Jimmy calls R-Truth a clown, so R-Truth is ready to fight. A handicap match is set up, but now it’s Omos and MVP interrupting. MVP thinks Omos should be the referee, but R-Truth doesn’t think Omos can count to ten. MVP: “Neither can you Truth.” The Profits are in and R-Truth is in, complete with a REMEMBER THE ALAMO (which Riddle said tonight too), so Omos and the Usos knock everyone down without much trouble.

Usos/Omos vs. R-Truth/Street Profits

R-Truth gets caught in the corner to start with all three villains getting in a forearm or two. Some shots out of the corner get R-Truth out of trouble and he flips out of a belly to back suplex. The Profits come in without a tag and hit stereo dropkicks, sending the Usos to the floor. Some dives hit the Usos (though Dawkins mostly crashes in a NASTY landing) but Omos pulls R-Truth out of the air and drops him on the apron to take over.

We take a break and come back with Omos still working on R-Truth as a power giant should. Jey comes in and gets knocked down, allowing the hot tag off to Ford. House is cleaned, including an enziguri to put Omos on the floor. Omos gets posted and a Doomsday Device (back elbow instead of a clothesline) gets two on Jimmy with Jey making a save. Dawkins hits the spinebuster but Omos tags himself in for the chokebomb and the pin at 11:30.

Rating: C+. It was a bit random, but I will absolutely take this over another singles match between one of the Profits and an Uso. There is no need to keep doing that same thing so mixing it up with some fresh faces is a good idea. I’m not sure if Dawkins needed to take the fall when R-Truth was right there but Omos getting the pin at all is good enough.

Seth Rollins is ready for tonight’s tag match but he doesn’t think much of Riddle attacking him last week. Riddle is just a bro that Randy Orton felt sorry for and now there is no Randy to hide behind. Rollins moves on to talking about Cody Rhodes but here is Theory to ask for Money In The Bank cash-in advice. That works for Rollins and they go off for a chat.

Creepy vignette again.

We look at Miz calling out Logan Paul again earlier tonight.

Paul has responded and wants Miz one on one at Summerslam. He’ll be here next week and (with eyes bugging out) it’ll be AWESOME!

Bobby Lashley/Riddle vs. Seth Rollins/Theory

Rollins knocks Riddle down and drops a knee to start before handing it off to Theory. Some rapid fire kicks in the corner drop Theory and it’s Lashley coming in for a change. A DDT to Rollins and a Downward Spiral to Theory at the same time gets two so Riddle comes back in. Everything breaks down and Rollins is sent outside for a ram into the post….and we have Dolph Ziggler?

We take a break and come back with Rollins hitting a reverse superplex on Riddle for a near fall. Theory comes in but charges into a choke from Riddle. That’s enough for the tag back to Lashley so house can be cleaned. A forearm to the back of the head cuts him off though and Rollins adds a frog splash for two. It’s back to Riddle for the Randy Orton comeback on Theory as Lashley spears Rollins through the barricade. Theory blocks the RKO and rolls Riddle up with feet on the ropes, only to have Ziggler (Remember him?) shove them off. The RKO gives Riddle the pin on Theory at 13:40.

Rating: C+. I kind of like the ending as Theory doesn’t have anything specific going on other than teasing a cash in, so give him some kind of a match at Summerslam instead. It isn’t like Ziggler has been around in the better part of ever anyway so bring him back in for something like this. Good enough match too, with the twist helping a bit.

Post match Ziggler superkicks Theory to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was the kind of show that felt long and then went even longer than that. There was some good action here and there, but for the most part it felt like a show where they were trying to fill in as much time as they could. Summerslam got a bit of a build, but the show was rather uninteresting and there wasn’t much worth getting excited about here.

Results
Finn Balor b. Rey Mysterio – Coup de Grace
Carmella b. Bianca Belair via countout
Ezekiel/AJ Styles b. Miz/Ciampa via DQ when Ciampa wouldn’t stop attacking Styles
Alexa Bliss/Asuka b. Doudrop/Nikki Ash – DDT to Ash
Omos/Usos b. R-Truth/Street Profits – Chokebomb to Dawkins
Riddle/Bobby Lashley b. Theory/Seth Rollins – RKO to Theory

 

 

 

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Money In The Bank 2022: Been There

Money In The Bank 2022
Date: July 2, 2022
Location: MGM Garden Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith, Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

It’s the ladder show as we focus on becoming something close to the #1 contender. That means the show is going to be built around the two ladder matches, so there aren’t going to be many options for the rest of the card. There are enough title matches around to fill things out, but this is all about the ladder matches. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at a bunch of the people on the show and how they could make it big tonight.

Becky Lynch vs. Liv Morgan vs. Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Shotzi vs. Raquel Rodriguez vs. Lacey Evans

Women’s Money In The Bank ladder match. It’s a brawl to start of course with Asuka being left in the ring to strike at Becky. A sliding kick to the face drops Becky and Asuka takes a ladder that Shotzi tries to bring in. Becky kicks Asuka down but can’t drop a ladder onto her. Rodriguez comes back in and powers away with the ladder, including suplexing Liv and Becky onto it at the same time. Everyone gets together and drives Rodriguez into the corner, with Liv being laid on the ladder in the same corner.

Evans hits the slingshot Bronco Buster onto Liv onto the ladder. A bunch of people are piled onto Liv, setting up Becky’s middle rope legdrop. Bliss hits a Molly Go Round onto Liv/Becky/Asuka and is the only one left standing. It’s way too early for that to work though as Rodriguez makes the save, only to get struck down by Bliss. Asuka is back in with a German suplex on Bliss but it’s Evans cutting off the climb.

Shotzi and Lacey take turns pulling each other off the ladder until Rodriguez goes up. Morgan joins them and it’s a sunset bomb to plant Evans in a landing that almost went badly. Becky is back in and goes up but the ladder is off center (and seems to be broken), allowing Shotzi to pull her down. Asuka makes another save and goes up but Rodriguez pulls her down. Their fight knocks the ladder onto the ropes until Rodriguez goes outside to get a fresh ladder.

Instead of climbing, she bridges the ladder between the ring and the announcers’ table and brawls with Asuka. That’s countered into a cross armbreaker but Becky comes in and lays Asuka on the ladder. The legdrop from a ladder onto Asuka drops both of them and everyone is down again. A bunch of ladders are brought in (as tends to be the case) and everyone goes up, with only Lynch being left. Liv goes up but her ladder is knocked over, only to have her kick the rope on the way down and bounce back up, allowing her to knock Becky over. Liv gets the briefcase at 16:29.

Rating: B-. There were some big crashes and falls in there and that is the main thing you want in these matches. As usual it was all about the carnage and insanity but they did something smart by going with someone who has been needing the big win. Now do it right with Liv and you might be going somewhere, though the Nikki Ash result is always a possibility.

We see Cody Rhodes’ preview of the men’s ladder match from Raw.

We recap Theory vs. Bobby Lashley for Theory’s US Title. Lashley wants the title, while Theory keeps bragging about how great he is and seems to think he is built better. It is kind of a weird setup but the match could work.

US Title: Theory vs. Bobby Lashley

Theory is defending and gets spinebustered early. The threat of a spear sends Theory outside so Lashley picks him up but Theory blocks the posting. Lashley gets posted instead but is right back up with a posting of his own. Back in and Theory manages a hard shot to the face for two and we hit the chinlock. Lashley finally powers out and starts striking away, including the running clothesline in the corner.

The delayed vertical suplex is countered so Lashley pulls him out of the air for a gorilla press powerslam instead. Back up and Theory sends him into the middle buckle, setting up the rolling dropkick for two. A Town Down is countered into a rollup for two more but Theory goes to the eyes. Theory hits his own spear but Lashley reverses A Town Down into the Hurt Lock for the tap and the title at 11:00.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what to think about this, but if there is no Raw World Champion, making Lashley the top singles champions makes as much sense as anything else. Theory losing clean is a little weird, but Raw is in a weird place at the moment so this might be the best thing they can do. Not much of a match, though at least they didn’t stick around too long.

Liv Morgan doesn’t know who she is cashing in on but for now, she is celebrating.

We recap Carmella challenging Bianca Belair for the Raw Women’s Title. Rhea Ripley is injured and can’t get the title shot, so Carmella won a multi-woman match to earn it instead. They have argued a good bit since then.

Raw Women’s Title: Carmella vs. Bianca Belair

Carmella is challenging and we get the Big Match Intros. Belair sends her to the apron to start and Carmella needs a breather. Back in and Belair does the kiss it spot in the corner, setting up the moonsault over her out of the corner. A backbreaker sets up a backbreaker to put Carmella down but the handspring moonsault misses. Carmella finally manages to snap the throat across the top rope and starts cranking on the arm.

That’s broken up so Carmella pulls her down by the hair. There’s a delayed vertical suplex on Carmella and Belair takes her into the corner to pound the turnbuckle in the vicinity of Carmella’s head. Carmella is back with the low superkick for two but she talks too much trash, meaning it’s the KOD to retain the title at 7:11.

Rating: C-. Yeah what else were you expecting here? Carmella had no chance of winning and was nothing more than a fill in challenger, so Belair running her over to keep the title made perfect sense. This was there as a way to get the title on the show and that’s all it needed to be. Don’t go further than that and things will be fine.

Post match Carmella jumps Belair again and forearms her down a bit. That is the most WWE thing I can think of at the moment: the match was just a step above a squash and had a clean finish but we need to keep it going because WWE doesn’t know how to just end a feud already.

We look at Logan Paul signing with WWE and he wants Miz at Summerslam.

Alexa Bliss and Lily plug the WWE credit card.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Street Profits

The Usos are defending and say you should bet on the Bloodline. The Profits come through the crowd for an old school feel. Dawkins takes over on Jimmy to start but it’s way too early for the frog splash. The Usos take a breather on the floor and we pause a bit until Jey comes in for a change. A running forearm drops Ford, who is right back with a crotch chop to Jimmy on the apron.

Dawkins drops Jey for two but a double spinebuster plants Dawkins for a change. Jimmy hits a dive to drop Dawkins on the floor and a right hand cuts off his comeback attempt back inside. Another shot to the face staggers Dawkins but he drops Jimmy, allowing the diving tag to Ford. Jey is fine enough to superkick a diving Ford out of the air for two and it’s time co choke on the ropes.

This isn’t exactly burning up the mat and Jimmy hits an apron kick to the face rocks Ford again. Something close to a top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two on Ford and some more slow shots to the face keep him down. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Jey superkicks Dawkins off the apron. Ford manages to get in a shot of his own but a springboard is cut off with another right hand.

With the beating continuing, Ford finally manages to knock Jimmy to the floor and brings Dawkins back in to clean house. The big running flip dive drops the Usos and the lifting swinging neckbreaker gets two on Jimmy. Everything breaks down and a tackle into a German suplex drops Jimmy for two. A Doomsday Blockbuster gives Ford two more and the Profits are shocked.

Dawkins gets to clean house again but it’s back to Ford, who gets double superkicked for two more. Cole: “We’re going to have an hour Broadway tonight here in Vegas.” No Cole, we aren’t. Ford hits the big running flip dive onto the Usos, setting up the frog splash for two back inside with Jimmy making the save. We get the big staredown and then the slugout until Dawkins is sent into the barricade. The 1D finishes Ford at 23:01.

Rating: B. This felt like the tag team version of Edge vs. Randy Orton at Vengeance 2004: it was long and the second half was good, but the first ten minutes were going in slow motion and seemed to be there to pad the runtime. The Profits weren’t completely nothing challengers and a title change wasn’t totally out of the question, but this could have have about eight minutes cut out and been a much tighter match.

Post match replays show that Ford’s shoulder was off the mat so the Profits aren’t happy.

We get a vignette of someone walking in the dark, featuring a bunch of candles, a cross, a medal hanging and someone walking in the dark. Not sure what that was.

We recap Natalya vs. Ronda Rousey for Rousey’s Smackdown Women’s Title. Rousey is defending, Natalya attacked her one night and ALMOST made her tap to the Sharpshooter, personal insults were thrown, time for a title match.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Natalya

Rousey is defending. Feeling out process to star with Natalya taking her down into an armbar. The early ankle lock is broken up but Natalya counters the basement dropkick into another ankle lock. That sends Natalya straight to the rope so she hits the discus lariat for two. Natalya works on the arm and even pulls Rousey out of the corner, setting up something like a seated abdominal stretch.

With that not working, the frustration starts setting in but another discus clothesline is countered into a throw. Piper’s Pit is countered into a rollup, which is countered into a rollup to give Rousey two. Another armbar is countered into the Sharpshooter from Rousey, who throws in a Shawn Michaels pose at the same time.

Natalya breaks out and sends her outside to bang up Rousey’s knee, setting up the Sharpshooter on the apron. With that broken up via gravity, Natalya gets thrown down and has to beat the count back in. They trade more submissions until Rousey counters a Sharpshooter into a cross armbreaker to retain at 12:33.

Rating: C. This wasn’t great but again, there was no drama on who was going to win here. Natalya is fine as a hand in the ring and the submission stuff was good, but it felt like a lot of waiting around until Rousey caught her. Rousey needs someone to give her a challenge or at least get a shake up of some kind, because this isn’t working very well.

Post match Rousey can barely stand but here is Liv Morgan with the briefcase.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Liv Morgan

Rousey is defending and picks the ankle to start. Morgan kicks the bad leg though and a rollup gives her the pin and the title at 27 seconds.

Post match Rousey congratulates Morgan and leaves so Morgan can soak in the YOU DESERVE IT chants. What a great way to make Rousey look pathetic, as she more or less said “oh well, lost the title, time to leave.”

Video on Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar at Summerslam.

Riddle vs. Seth Rollins vs. Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Sami Zayn vs. Madcap Moss vs. Omos

Men’s Money In The Bank ladder match….and hang on because here is Adam Pearce to add someone to the match.

Riddle vs. Seth Rollins vs. Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Sami Zayn vs. Madcap Moss vs. Omos vs. Theory

Still the Men’s Money In The Bank ladder match. A bunch of people go after Omos to start but he shrugs them off and hits people with the ladder. Sami hides behind the post as Sheamus comes in for some failed slugging attempts on Omos. The swarming slows Omos down again until a Claymore puts him on the floor. That leaves Sheamus and McIntyre to slug it out so Theory tries to go up the ladder, earning himself an exchange of forearms to the chest from Sheamus and McIntyre.

Rollins comes in to send them outside and tosses a ladder onto them for a bonus. Riddle jumps Rollins and backdrops him onto the ladder but Sami sends Riddle outside. Back in and Riddle goes up, with Moss being right there to meet him. Omos makes the save and pulls both of them off, including a powerslam to Riddle. Everyone goes after Omos, this time using ladders to put him down again. With Omos buried under a bunch of ladders, most of the remaining people go up some ladders with Theory being the last man standing.

Moss pulls him down for a fall away slam so Sami goes up, with Moss powerbombing him into a ladder bridged in the corner. McIntyre and Moss slug it out on top of the ladder until Moss goes down. Sheamus breaks it up and hits White Noise but Riddle avoids the Brogue. The hanging DDT out of a ladder plants Sheamus and the Floating Bro off the top of the ladder hits a pile of people. Omos is back in and gets to wreck some people until Riddle slows him down.

Theory tries to go up but gets chokebombed back down. A Brogue Kick into a Helluva kick into a triangle choke has Omos in trouble and Moss helps toss Omos over the top. More group beatings slow Omos down again and it’s a team powerbomb through the announcers’ table. Everyone else brawls on the floor until Sami goes up, only to have McIntyre make the save. Sheamus takes both of them down but Futureshock drops Sheamus as well.

That lets McIntyre go up but Butch comes in to make the save with a choke on the ladder. McIntyre is brought back down and Brogue Kick takes him down again. Sheamus puts the ladder onto McIntyre and goes up, only to have McIntyre shove him off for a huge crash. The Claymore drops Butch but Sheamus makes another save. Sami shoves both of them into a ladder in the corner though and goes up, only to have Moss make the save.

Moss almost gets the case (they had me for a second there) until Rollins pulls him down for a Stomp. Riddle is back in with a ladder that is less than a foot away from the briefcase and goes up, with Rollins on a shorter ladder next to him. They slug it out with Riddle being knocked down but coming back up for a super RKO to leave everyone down. Riddle makes the slow climb until Theory makes a faster climb, knocks Riddle down, and wins at 25:26.

Rating: B. The match was good, but this is the ceiling for most Money in the Bank matches. It felt like we have seen every single thing they were doing in here before and adding Theory at the last minute just made it feel all the more obvious that he was winning. These matches are build on the car crash formula and that is only going to get you so far when you have so many people involved and are trying to get in so many things. I haven’t been a fan of these things for awhile and this was a good example of why.

Theory poses a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. As a show, as a match and as a concept, Money In The Bank is feeling more played out every year. The ladder matches didn’t do much and I have little reason to believe that Morgan is now going to join the upper echelon of the women’s division. Theory will hold the briefcase for awhile, but it’s hard to imagine him taking the title anytime soon. I do like pushing some fresh people with the ladder matches, but Liv more or less using a cheat code to get the title doesn’t give me much hope.

Other than that, there was the usual good and bad from WWE, though nothing you really need to watch. Overall, I did like the show enough, but it wasn’t a show that interested me on paper and that is how Money In The Bank tends to be. Even WWE seems to be more interested in Summerslam and based on the fact that this wasn’t in a stadium, the fans might be agreeing.

Results
Liv Morgan won the Women’s Money In The Bank ladder match
Bobby Lashley b. Theory – Hurt Lock
Bianca Belair b. Carmella – KOB
Usos b. Street Profits – 1D to Ford
Ronda Rousey b. Natalya – Cross armbreaker
Liv Morgan b. Ronda Rousey – Rollup
Theory won the Men’s Money In The Bank ladder match

 

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Money In A Bank 2022 Preview

It’s time to climb. We have reached another of WWE’s major pay per view events and this time it is mostly going to be about becoming something close to #1 contender. As usual, there is a men’s and women’s version, both of which should have quite the collection of major spots. These shows tend to be a lot of fun, even if the build could use some work. Let’s get to it.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey(c) vs. Natalya

Let’s get this one out of the way before it puts me to sleep. This hasn’t been an interesting feud as Natalya is by definition not interesting. Rousey hasn’t been much better, but WWE has been trying to turn Natalya into something bigger than she is and it hasn’t quite been working. That is what they are trying to do again here though, apparently due to Sasha Banks’ latest meltdown.

Of course I’ll go with Rousey winning here, as the story of “I ALMOST made her tap to the Sharpshooter in a non-match” isn’t enough to sway me to the Natalya side. I’m sure the match itself will be fine as Natalya can get a decent one out of anybody but my goodness the story hasn’t worked. Just get us on to Summerslam and a bigger opponent for Rousey…assuming they have one somewhere.

Raw Women’s Title: Bianca Belair(c) vs. Carmella

Here is the other side of Banks and Naomi walking out, as Carmella gets this spot instead of, well, anyone who might be a better option. I know they’re going with the MELLA IS MONEY stuff but come on. Carmella hasn’t meant a thing as a singles wrestler in the better part of forever and there is little reason to believe that is going to change against one of the biggest stars in the division.

Belair retains here and she does so after some token control from Carmella. There is no reason to believe that Carmella is getting the title from Belair, especially about three months into Belair’s reign. This match is even more proof that there does not need to be Women’s Tag Team Titles, as Carmella is somehow important enough to go after one of the singles belts. Maybe it is time to merge them, but for now, Belair retains and does so pretty handily.

Tag Team Titles: Usos(c) vs. Street Profits

This is the first title match where I have to pause for a second to think about the results. While it would make all the sense in the world for the Usos to retain, the Profits are just good enough that they could be a threat. The Usos are a great team, but someone is going to have to take the titles from them. While I’m not sold on the idea of it being the Profits, it wouldn’t be the biggest upset in the world.

That being said, yeah the Usos retain here, as this isn’t the right spot to take the belts off of them. The Profits will possibly be champions again someday, but they’re up against a buzzsaw here. Let Ford get in another star making performance before the team ultimately falls, because it is going to take a major victory to get the titles off of the Usos. The Profits are capable of doing that, but I don’t think they do it here.

US Title: Theory(c) vs. Bobby Lashley

This one has my interest because I could see it going either way. Theory is the new hot star in WWE and I could see him going over Lashley for a big win. At the same time, Lashley doesn’t lose very often and it wouldn’t shock me to see him get the title here. Lashley needs something to do though and there is a chance that someone interferes here and costs him the match.

I think I’ll take Theory to win here, as WWE has put a good deal into him already and it would be a pretty big surprise to see him drop the title here. Lashley getting the win wouldn’t be the worst idea or a major shock, but Theory getting a win over a former WWE Champion would look good for him. Odds are there are some shenanigans, but Theory leaves with the title in the end.

Women’s Money In The Bank Ladder Match

This is an interesting one as I’m not sure where they’re going, though in this case that’s due to no one really standing out. There are seven participants here and I think we can eliminate Alexa Bliss, Asuka and Shotzi. Bliss doesn’t feel right for it, Asuka has been done and Shotzi isn’t there. At the same time, I’ll write off Lacey Evans because she has been back for all of a cup of coffee.

That leaves us with three, and I think I’ll actually take Liv Morgan. I know it’s a long shot as WWE has refused to pull the trigger on her for the better part of ever, but more or less handing her a win could be a way to go. Morgan is at the point where she pretty much has to win something at some point and a stolen title is better than no title at all. Becky Lynch is always an option and I wouldn’t ignore Raquel Rodriguez, but I’ll take Morgan in my prediction sure to be wrong.

Men’s Money In The Bank Ladder Match

Now this one is a little more interesting as we have a few options for the winner. First of all, we’ll drop Madcap Moss, Sami Zayn, Omos and Sheamus. They’re not winning and there is no reason to believe that they will. I’ll also drop Riddle, as it seems like he is destined for some big losses in the major matches. That leaves us with two options and I think I know where it is going.

The idea from WWE has been that the winner will cash in on the winner of Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar at Summerslam, but I’ll go with the second option and say Drew McIntyre. I could absolutely see McIntyre cashing in at Clash At The Castle for a regular title match instead of the surprise and that is something that fits well for him. It would make sense for him, and hopefully that is where they go.

Overall Thoughts

You never can tell what you are going to get from these shows as the ladder matches can be rather hard to predict. The good thing is the matches should be fun and there is enough intrigue running around to make things fun, but it doesn’t matter if WWE doesn’t follow through on the good. Have a good show, but also have a follow through, which is often the more difficult part.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – July 1, 2022: Nope.

Smackdown
Date: July 1, 2022
Location: Footprint Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Money in the Bank and that means we probably need a lot of talk about the percentages of wrestlers who successfully cash in. I for one could go for some good old statistics to make me care about the show, as it isn’t like there is much else to say. Maybe they can surprise us though. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The participants in the men’s Money in the Bank ladder match are on ladders in the ring (save for Omos) and talk about how they want to win on Saturday. It means they can cash in, with Seth Rollins saying Summerslam sounds like a good idea. Sami Zayn says he’ll win and keep the contract in the Bloodline’s house. MVP laughs off the idea of anyone but Omos winning and there is no one who can do anything to stop them. Sheamus wants to beat Brock Lesnar, though Drew McIntyre says he has already done it.

Cue Miz (Drew: “The frickin MIZ?”) to says he is a two time Mr. Money in the Bank winner and deserves to be in the match. Cue Ezekiel to say what you would expect, followed by Happy Corbin doing the same. Madcap Moss joins in and here is Adam Pearce to make a battle royal.

Battle Royal

Omos, Ezekiel, Madcap Moss, Happy Corbin, Miz, Sheamus, Seth Rollins, Drew McIntyre, Riddle

Not just a battle royal, but a GOOD OLD FASHIONED battle royal. It’s a brawl to start with no one being able to do much with anyone. Omos tosses Ezekiel and does the same to Moss, followed by Miz, leaving Corbin and those already qualified. McIntyre and Omos have their slugout, which goes badly for McIntyre as he gets thrown down. Sheamus gets tossed into the corner as well and Rollins eliminates himself in a smart move, only to have Riddle go outside (not eliminated) and hit an RKO on the floor. Everyone gets rid of Omos and we take a break.

Back with the villains taking over on Riddle and McIntyre, which lasts as long as you might expect until Sheamus hits the forearms to Sami’s chest. Riddle is back with a Bro To Sleep to Sheamus, followed by the snap powerslam (minus some of the snap). Back up and Sheamus knees Riddle out, leaving us with Sheamus, Sami, Corbin and McIntyre. Sami Helluva Kicks Sheamus by mistake but Sheamus is fine enough to Claymore McIntyre.

Now it’s McIntyre getting to clean house, though he doesn’t actually eliminate anyone. With Corbin on the ground (not eliminated, meaning he’s winning), McIntyre hits the Futureshock on Sheamus. Sami comes back and gets Claymored, setting up the elimination. Sheamus is almost dumped but it’s Corbin coming back in to toss McIntyre and Sheamus at the same time for the win at 15:25.

Rating: C-. What else is there to say about a match like this? It didn’t have any stakes and Corbin was telegraphed as the winner as soon as he was the only one not in the ladder match left. It isn’t an interesting match and it wasn’t that good, but at least it filled up the first half hour of the show.

Corbin is happy with his win but has nothing to be said about Pat McAfee.

Video on Natalya vs. Ronda Rousey, mainly focusing on last week’s showdown and exchange of insults.

Natalya laughs off Ronda Rousey’s threats and mocks Rousey’s movie career. Now she is going to make Rousey tap out and become the two time Smackdown Women’s Champion.

New Day vs. Viking Raiders

Before the match, Kofi says it’s great to be in Phoenix in June. Woods: “Kofi it’s not June anymore.” Kofi: “JU-LYING!” That somehow wins him $5 but it’s time to get serious. Last week the Vikings were back and attacked them, so get out here right now and get your Asgards kicked. The team is officially billed as The New Vicious Viking Raiders, just to hammer in the idea. It’s a brawl before the bell and New Day is left laying after a bunch of shield shots. No match.

Happy Corbin, Ezekiel, Miz and Madcap Moss are arguing over who should be in the Money in the Bank ladder match. Miz: “I WAS ON THE TODAY SHOW THIS MORNING!” Moss: “I’m just happy to be here.” As Miz looks appalled by that statement, the four way for the spot is announced for later, making the entire first half hour of this show a waste of time.

Asuka/Liv Morgan/Alexa Bliss vs. Shotzi/Raquel Rodriguez/Lacey Evans

Becky Lynch comes out to join commentary as Asuka shoves Shotzi into the corner to start. Evans comes in to take Asuka into the corner and there’s the slingshot Bronco Buster. A sunset flip slows Rodriguez down so Bliss comes in for a change. Rodriguez splashes her in the corner to cut that off, followed by a running shoulder to drop her again.

Liv comes in and gets taken down in the corner by Shotzi. That sets off the parade of flips and dives as the Raw women stand tall as we take a break. Back with Bliss dropkicking Rodriguez as Cole tries to talk to Lynch and McAfee actually calls the match. Shotzi takes over on Bliss and grabs….I think a Boston crab, but Bliss escapes.

Bliss escapes and brings in Asuka, who seems to no sell and enziguri and grabs the ankle lock. That’s broken up and Asuka hits the hip attack for two. Another hip attack misses in the ropes so Liv tags herself in and hits the Codebreaker, with Rodriguez having to make a save. Everything breaks down and Oblivion finishes Shotzi at 13:18.

Rating: D+. This is the kind of match that makes me loathe Money in the Bank season. This was the better part of fifteen minutes for the sake of building momentum towards a match that has nothing to do with pinning each other. The teams will be fighting each other tomorrow and absolutely none of this will matter. Somehow this is all WWE does for the ladder matches and it’s an even bigger waste of time every year.

Sonya Deville asks Adam Pearce about the handicap match last week and has FILED AN OFFICIAL COMPLAINT. Deville slaps him in the face and leaves. I said an audible “oh good grief” on that one as this dumb power struggle story continues.

And now, a GAME SHOW between the Usos and the Street Profits, with Kayla Braxton presiding. This means Braxton asks questions, such as are the Usos scared to lose. They aren’t scared because they run all of the shows but the Profits say the Usos just run to the grocery store for Roman Reigns.

As for the Profits, it has been a year and half since they have been champs, and now there are rumors they aren’t getting along. Ford: “Where did you hear that?” Dawkins: “Dirtsheets?” Profits: “Probably.” Ford talks about the Usos’ family, prompting the Usos to say “respect”. They talk about legacy, trash talk each other and steal the other team’s catchphrases before staring each other down. I was promised a game show here but there was no game show to be found.

Max Dupri is ready for his Maximum Male Models showcase.

And now, Max Dupri for the debut of his models. Dupri introduces the models, starting with ma.çè (pronounced “Mah-Say”), yes spelled that way and formerly known as Mace), with Dupri explaining how physically perfect his physique is. Next up is the former Mansoor, but now known as Man.soor (with the letters having symbols over them that I don’t know how to type). Pronounced “Man-Swah”, he has a fanny pack around his neck, drawing in some Michael Hayes comparisons. Believe it or not, McAfee is a huge fan and Cole is trying not to break. For a lower midcard gimmick, I’ve certainly seen worse.

Ronda Rousey reminds us that her daughter is nine months old instead of ten like Natalya said. Oh and she’ll make Natalya tap tomorrow. Keeping this short and sweet is a good idea.

Money In The Bank rundown.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Happy Corbin vs. Miz vs. Madcap Moss vs. Ezekiel

It’s a brawl to start with neither being able to do much. Ezekiel and Moss are left alone with the former hitting a slam but getting elbowed in the jaw. With Ezekiel on the floor, Corbin comes back in to clean house, only to have Miz break it up. Everyone else is on the floor with Miz missing a charge and being sent into the announcers’ table. Corbin sends Moss into the steps and chokeslams Ezekiel onto the announcers’ table as we take a break. Back with Corbin in control but Moss is back with the Punchline for two as Ezekiel makes a save.

Ezekiel’s middle rope crossbody is countered into a fall away slam but Miz is there with the running knee to Moss. Deep Six cuts Miz off for two more and Corbin is frustrated. Ezekiel is back up to clean house until he has to break out of Corbin’s chokeslam attempt. A jumping knee rocks Corbin and there’s a spinebuster to Moss. Miz gets sent into the corner but comes back with the Skull Crushing Finale for two as Corbin makes the save. Corbin hits End of Days on Miz but takes too long looking at McAfee, allowing Moss to send him into the post and steal the pin on Miz at 10:34.

Rating: C. So yes, the entire first half hour of this show was a TOTAL WASTE OF TIME because it meant absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things. That is a very Money in the Bank season match and I can’t say I’m the slightest bit surprised. The ending probably helps set up McAfee vs. Corbin, which is going to be fun later in the month, but it would have been nice to do something a bit more important for this show.

McAfee mocks Corbin to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Nope. This was the kind of show that I can’t stand and yet here it was with every one of the problems that you would expect from a show like this one. It felt like they were trying to fill in the two hours that they had here with stuff that either meant nothing or wasn’t good enough to make a more important show. It’s the reason why I can’t stand this time of year in WWE and I’m not surprised it was any worse this time around.

Results
Happy Corbin won a battle royal last eliminating Drew McIntyre and Sheamus
Asuka/Liv Morgan/Alexa Bliss b. Raquel Rodriguez/Lacey Evans/Shotzi – Oblivion to Shotzi
Madcap Moss b. Ezekiel, Happy Corbin and Miz – End of Days to Miz

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 27, 2022: Twenty Years Is A Long Time

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 27, 2022
Location: Sames Auto Arena, Laredo, Texas
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Jimmy Smith

It’s a very special night as John Cena is here to celebrate twenty years (to the day) of his WWE debut. That should be enough to carry the night and that might need to be the case. This is also the go home edition of Raw for Money In The Bank, meaning it’s time to build momentum, establish dominance, and maybe even come up with an original tagline for what the participants are doing. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Earlier today, John Cena returned to quite the hero’s welcome, meeting a bunch of applauding wrestlers and backstage workers. He does kind of deserve it.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Battle Royal

T-Bar, Mustafa Ali, Shanky, Akira Tozawa, Rey Mysterio, Dominik Mysterio, Ricochet, Shinsuke Nakamura, Jinder Mahal, Riddle, Miz, AJ Styles, Ciampa, Reggie, Shelton Benjamin, Dolph Ziggler, R-Truth, Veer Mahaan

Tozawa is tossed out fast and Mahaan clotheslines Benjamin out. The Mysterios and Ali get together and eliminate Mahaan, leaving R-Truth to try to dance with Shanky. Mahal is having none of that though and Truth is tossed. Styles eliminates Mahal and Shanky, with T-Bar throwing Reggie onto them.

We take a break and come back with Ali gone at Ciampa’s knee but Styles knocks Ciampa out. Miz blocks Rey’s 619 and hits the short DDT, which isn’t enough for the elimination. Dominik tries to get rid of Ziggler but gets tossed himself. Miz manages to toss Rey but can’t do the same to Riddle, who gets back in underneath the bottom rope. Ricochet knocks T-Bar to the apron, where he pulls Ricochet out with him.

Ricochet gets thrown onto a standing ladder before diving back to the apron. A not so great headscissors takes T-Bar out as we take another break. Back again with Riddle, Miz, Ziggler, Ricochet, Nakamura and Styles still alive. Miz hits a middle rope ax handle on Riddle but hurts his leg on the landing and goes down. Nakamura knocks Ziggler out but gets kicked to the floor by Riddle. Miz is down on the floor (not eliminated) with medics looking at his knee as Ricochet is catapulted onto the middle rope.

A spinning crossbody is dropkicked out of the air by Styles, who throws Ricochet out. That leaves us with Riddle vs. Styles, with Corey saying we’re down to two. Styles loads up the Phenomenal Forearm but Miz pops up to pull Styles out, meaning it’s Miz vs. Riddle. The hanging DDT drops Miz but he counters the RKO into the Skull Crushing Finale. Riddle manages to hurricanrana him out to the apron and the RKO is good enough to give Riddle the win at 19:23.

Rating: C. It was a battle royal and they almost had to go with Riddle getting the win here. At the end of the day, he has one of the biggest stories in the company at the moment and it involves Roman Reigns. As for the match itself, it was a long battle royal but at least they had some star power there at the end and that is what makes these work as well as they can most of the time.

Commentary: The field is complete!

Commentary: There is one spot left!

Get it together people.

The Street Profits introduce John Cena….but he’s on the wrong side, meaning the camera has to swing around a bit. They ask Cena for advice at Money In The Bank but he reminds them of their success. Cena tells them to never stop, which they interpret as……Never Give Up.

Shawn Michaels, Big Show (he doesn’t even go here), Booker T., Daniel Bryan (he doesn’t even go here either), Trish Stratus and HHH all congratulate Cena on his 20 years.

Riddle is fired up about Money in the Bank and shakes Kevin Patrick to blow off some of the steam.

Jimmy Uso vs. Montez Ford

Uso runs him over to start but gets armdragged into an armbar for his efforts. That’s broken up and they head outside, with Ford being sent into the steps as we take a break. Back with Ford fighting up and hitting a clothesline, followed by a kick to the ribs. The running Blockbuster gives Ford two and he hits a heck of a dive against the barricade. Back in and one heck of a frog splash finishes Jimmy at 9:50.

Rating: C+. They had a good enough match here, but I could go for ANYTHING ELSE to keep the story going until Saturday. Have them talk to each other if you have to, but find a way to fill in the gap a bit differently. They’ve done this over and over now and odds are we’ll see it again on Smackdown, because you have to complete the concept you see.

The Mysterios run into Finn Balor and Damian Priest. Balor talks about Rey coming up on his 20 year anniversary but says Rey hasn’t been doing so well as of late. Priest gives Dominik a sales pitch and Rey has to be held back. The match seems to be set for next week in San Diego.

Here’s a long John Cena career retrospective, complete with a look at Cena debuting against Kurt Angle and Undertaker giving him the famous handshake of respect. We also see stuff on his Make-A-Wish work and wrap it up with the testimonials. I know he might not be the most popular and there are some fair criticisms about him, but my goodness Cena is one of the all time legends for a reason.

Here is Miz for a chat, but first we need to look at Logan Paul training at the Performance Center. Miz promises that he and Paul will be back at Summerslam, but first we need to look at Miz turning on Paul at Wrestlemania. Miz mocks the idea of the interviewer being a journalist and hypes up his own media career. After Wrestlemania, he told Paul that was an education and promises that they will be Tag Team Champions. The only disappointment is AJ Styles, which prompts a question about Miz’s tiny……and we are NOT making that a thing. Cue AJ to deck Miz and the match is on.

AJ Styles vs. Miz

Styles starts fast and hits the drop down dropkick but Miz is right back with a shot of his own. The running crotch attack in the ropes drops AJ again and the ax handle gives Miz two. The chinlock goes on for a bit, only to have Miz get knocked to the floor. Styles misses the moonsault though and Miz drops him again as we take a break.

Back with Miz hitting the YES Kicks but AJ snaps off a German suplex for a breather. The fireman’s carry neckbreaker gives AJ two but Miz gets in a shot of his own to cut him off. AJ counters the Skull Crushing Finale into a rollup for two and there’s a brainbuster to leave both of them down. Styles loads up the Phenomenal Forearm but Miz bails to the floor and takes the countout at 13:00.

Rating: C. Not exactly a great match but Miz being a coward continues to work out for him. This felt like a match sent out there to fill in time though and that is rarely a good feeling. It was fine while it lasted, but both guys seem to be waiting on something to do. Miz has that in the form of Logan Paul, though I don’t know about Styles at the moment.

John Cena meets Ezekiel, which has him a bit confused. Cena asks about Elias, who is apparently giving Elrod (yes Elrod) a tour. His advice to Ezekiel though: never forget who you really are. Ezekiel leaves but Theory comes in and hypes himself up, listing off his accomplishments. Oh and Cena is a grown man wearing jorts. Theory loads up the selfie but Cena slips away.

Kurt Angle, Randy Orton, JBL, Chris Jericho (there’s a gasp), Stephanie McMahon and Steve Austin all pay tribute to John Cena.

Here is Bianca Belair for a chat. After a look at Carmella jumping her last week, Belair lists off her catchphrases and tells Carmella to come get her right now. Cue Carmella to say she has the beauty and the brains and is going to take the title on Saturday. Kevin Patrick tries to ask Belair another question so Carmella tries a cheap shot, which earns her a right hand to the face. Belair stands tall. This felt like they had to get these two on the show and they couldn’t think of anything else.

Liv Morgan and Alexa Bliss are friends now but they won’t be on Saturday. Badly written lines with worse line reading ensues.

Liv Morgan vs. Alexa Bliss

Asuka is on commentary. Feeling out process to start with some grappling going to Bliss. She misses the moonsault knees though as Asuka can’t quite master English again. Bliss avoids a middle rope dropkick and grabs the chinlock. Back up and Oblivion misses, allowing Bliss to grab the DDT. That’s countered into a rollup to give Morgan the pin at 3:23, leaving Asuka worried/surprised.

Rating: C-. Asuka was a bit of a distraction here but the match wasn’t going to be much in the first place. This felt like the kind of match where Morgan was supposed to build momentum but, as is the case every time, it has nothing to do with a ladder match. I don’t know how much of a chance either of them have on Saturday, though I can take these two getting a few minutes to remind us that they’re around.

Video on John Cena’s Make-A-Wish stuff. Still absolutely incredible.

Here is Vince McMahon to introduce John Cena, who comes through a tunnel of adoring stars. With Vince gone, Cena says this is a milestone, which he rarely likes to celebrate because he is always looking forward. However, tonight he has been looking back at what he has done and he couldn’t do it without these people. Cena has been allowed to do this for two decades and that is because of the fans.

The people have been honest enough to tell him when he sucks and kind enough to tell him when he doesn’t. Cena has been waiting for that right moment and this feels like that right moment. We get a THANK YOU CENA chant and he says his heart is beating out of his chest. Cena thanks the fans for moments like that one and for making him who he is. He has always said WWE prepared him for anything and he doesn’t mean Fast and the Furious or Peacemaker.

WWE has made him a better human being, person and husband. Spending moments with the families he has spent time with today has taught him empathy and kindness. The fans have taught him humility and perseverance and every time he gets in the ring, he gives everything he has because these fans give him everything they have. This isn’t about a last name but about people coming together and he’s 45 years old. He doesn’t know when you’ll see him again, though he isn’t saying it isn’t happening. Fans: “ONE MORE MATCH!” Cena: “It ain’t just gonna be one. Don’t worry about that.”

It isn’t about him but about us. If you like something, tell the people. If you see something that sucks, tell the people. Cena thanks the people and asks Laredo to show what kind of noise they can make. Some catchphrases wrap us up. Cena didn’t say much here, but it felt a lot more real than some of the things he usually says. Good stuff, even if it didn’t mean a great deal.

Alpha Academy vs. Bobby Lashley

Theory is guest enforcer. Lashley can’t clothesline Otis down to start but he can shoulder him down. Theory gets on the apron to break up the suplex attempt though, leaving Lashley to send Otis into the corner. Lashley chases Theory outside, allowing Chad Gable to hit a flip dive off the apron. Otis adds the splash and we take a break.

Back with Lashley still in trouble but fighting out of a neck crank. Otis breaks up a superplex and powerbombs Lashley down, setting up Gable’s moonsault for two. Otis goes up this time but Lashley catches him in an electric chair. Gable comes off the top, only to land in the Hurt Lock for the tap at 8:18.

Rating: C. All this match did is make me wonder why we didn’t get to see this match last week to set up Lashley vs. Theory at Money In The Bank. It kept Theory from taking a loss and served the entirely same purpose. At least they kept Lashley looking strong and he should be in for a good match against Theory at the show.

Post match the beatdown is on but Lashley fights them all off.

We look at Cody Rhodes defeating Seth Rollins inside the Cell and Rollins attacking him the next night on Raw.

We get an interview with Cody, who has his pectoral muscle taped up while sitting in a gym. Cody says he might have been flying a little too close to the sun and now he is out for nine months, though he is trying to beat that. He gives his thoughts on the men’s Money in the Bank ladder match, which includes Rollins. If Rollins wins, Cody will be the first to congratulate him.

Seth Rollins comes up to John Cena in the back and laughs to the tune of Cena’s music. Rollins compares their careers and success before saying he’ll win Money in the Bank. Then Omos pops up to scare Rollins a bit, which MVP seems to like. Rollins looks to Cena for help but Cena wishes him luck and bails.

Money in the Bank rundown.

Becky Lynch vs. Tamina vs. Doudrop vs. Nikki Ash vs. Shayna Baszler vs. Xia Li

Elimination match and everyone jumps Becky to start. The ring is cleared other than Tamina and Doudrop but Nikki breaks up the staredown. Ash breaks that up but the fight goes through anyway, allowing Becky to come in with a Molly Go Round to Doudrop. Li comes back in to roll Becky up for two but Li has to deal with Ash. The Manhandle Slam gets rid of Li at 2:32 so it’s Shayna coming in to go after Becky.

With that broken up, Doudrop comes in to crush Shayna in the corner but Tamina makes a save. Ash sends Tamina into Becky’s missile dropkick, only to have Becky Disarm Ash for the tap at 4:25. We take a break and come back with Becky suplexing Baszler against the barricade but Doudrop crushes Becky and Tamina against the same barricade.

Back in and we hit the Tower of Doom to leave everyone laying again in the big crash. Baszler kneebars Tamina but gets splashed by Doudrop for the pin at 10:55. Tamina Samoan drops Becky but misses the Superfly Splash. Doudrop Vader Bombs Tamina for the pin at 12:22, ending my thinking that WWE might actually go there. That leaves Doudrop to miss the Vader Bomb on Becky, who is back with a super Manhandle Slam for the win at 13:18.

Rating: C+. Did they just forget about Becky being a heel for a night? This was Becky mowing down the women’s undercard without much trouble and acting like a total heroine the whole time. I was slightly worried that they would go with Tamina here but they got Becky into the match, as they needed to do. Just remember what kind of a person she is at the moment.

Overall Rating: C. Cena carried this show with star power alone because the rest of the show was only so good. It was about building up two spots in the ladder matches and a few other things for Saturday, as the card is only looking so interesting. You can only get so much out of a pay per view that is about a future title shot rather than the title that night, which might explain why it is in the friendly confines of an arena. The show wasn’t all that exciting, but Cena helped it along well enough.

Results
Riddle won a battle royal last eliminating Miz
Montez Ford b. Jimmy Uso – Frog splash
AJ Styles b. Miz via countout
Liv Morgan b. Alexa Bliss – Small package
Bobby Lashley b. Alpha Academy – Hurt Lock to Gable
Becky Lynch won a five woman elimination match last eliminating Doudrop

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




Monday Night Raw – June 20, 2022: All The Old Tricks

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 20, 2022
Location: Pinnacle Bank Arena, Lincoln, Nebraska
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We are less than two weeks away from Money in the Bank and that means we are probably in for some qualifying matches. Those can make for some interesting showdowns, though I’m not sure I would get my hopes up for that around here. On top of that, Riddle gets to deal with the fallout of losing to Roman Reigns on Smackdown. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory Of Tim White.

Here is Bianca Belair for a chat. After getting in her catchphrases, she says that the match with Rhea Ripley isn’t happening….for now. So who gets the title shot at Money in the Bank instead? Tonight we have five women competing, in the form of Alexa Bliss, Liv Morgan, Carmella, Asuka and Becky Lynch, in a fatal five way match to see who gets the shot. All five competitors come out one by one to say they should get the title shot while also taking shots at each other. Belair says she is ready for a fight so let’s have the match. Standard revolving door intro as the women continue to be catty to each other.

Alexa Bliss vs. Liv Morgan vs. Asuka vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella

One fall to a finish. Bliss and Morgan trade rollups to start and then roll around the ring on a small package attempt. Carmella comes back in to cover both of them until Asuka comes in to miss a bunch of strikes to the face. A spinning backfist drops Carmella but Becky trips Asuka to the floor. Bliss’ running Blockbuster gets two on Carmella, who rolls Bliss up and yells at her. Back in and Morgan sends Carmella into the corner before going up, only to be shoved onto the pile. Corey: “Who is headed to Money in the” and we go to a break.

Back with Becky escaping the Asuka Lock and hitting the Manhandle Slam on Asuka. Bliss comes off the top for the save and gets her own two with Morgan and Carmella making their own save. Becky drops Morgan but gets pulled to the floor by Asuka for the save. Bliss tries Twisted Bliss but hits raised knees, only to have Carmella superkick Morgan for the pin at 12:23.

Rating: C-. So they’re just punting on the title match? I’m not sure why Ripley is out but Belair could probably wrestle herself to a more interesting match than anything Carmella is going to be able to offer. Carmella hasn’t been around since Wrestlemania but now she gets a title match because someone is out? I know Becky and Asuka vs. Belair have been done but….Carmella? It’s almost like having such a shallow women’s division can cause problems.

Post match, Becky Lynch is yelling about not being at Money in the Bank. Post break, Becky is still yelling and eventually gets a Money in the Bank qualifying match against Asuka for later tonight. Becky is not pleased, though she might not be as surprised if she had read the official Raw preview that advertised Lynch vs. Asuka in a qualifying match.

Here is Vince McMahon for a chat. This week marks the 1517th episode of Raw, continuing its role as the longest running weekly episodic show in history. For that, Vince thanks the fans for being there for them. Twenty of those years have been dominated by John Cena, who is back next week. End of speech, though Vince does trip a bit on the way out of the ring. Now that felt like trolling.

Video on Roman Reigns vs. Riddle on Smackdown, with Reigns retaining but getting taken out by the returning Brock Lesnar after the fact. Reigns vs. Lesnar, Last Man Standing at Summerslam.

Here is Riddle for a chat before his Money in the Bank qualifying match. Before the match, Riddle talks about swearing vengeance against Roman Reigns for injuring Randy Orton. He got THIS close on Smackdown but a big spear was enough to beat him. Now Riddle can’t challenge for the title again, but he can win Money in the Bank and cash in to end Reigns’ reign of terror. We hear about the other participants, with Riddle wanting to hit Seth Rollins with a ladder for what he did to Cody Rhodes.

Cue Omos and MVP to interrupt, with MVP suggesting that Riddle is REALLY high right now if he thinks he has a chance against Omos. Tonight, Riddle is going to have a bad comedown when Omos slams him down. Riddle likes the joke but promises to take Omos down with an RKO, which is spelled with three letters.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Riddle vs. Omos

Riddle has taped up ribs but charges at him to start, setting up some rapid fire kicks in the corner. Omos takes him down with a side slam and hits a running elbow to crush Riddle. The logical bearhug goes on for a good while until Riddle fights out again. Some running shots in the corner are cut off by a toss across the ring but Riddle gets his feet up in the corner. The Floating Bro staggers Omos but the RKO is countered into the chokebomb for the pin at 3:51.

Rating: C-. These losses with Riddle trying so many of Orton’s moves and mannerisms could be leading somewhere, as I could see Orton being sick of Riddle losing using his stuff. Throw in Riddle dedicating a huge match to Orton and then losing and some seeds are being planted. Riddle vs. Orton is a huge match if that is where they want to go, and waiting so much longer makes it worth the effort. Or RKBro is back as the most over act on Raw. Kind of hard to lose either way there.

Post match Omos lays Riddle out again and leaves, with Seth Rollins coming to the ring. Rollins kicks him to the floor and laughs at Riddle for losing back to back matches. He promises to win the briefcase and cash it in on Roman Reigns, who has been ducking him since the Royal Rumble. The speech takes so long that Riddle gets back in, only to get kicked in the ribs and Stomped.

Here is Theory, on the pose down platform from last week, for a chat. After looking at a recap of Theory spraying baby oil on Bobby Lashley to blind him last week, Theory brags about how great he is and how no one can touch him. Next week is the twenty year celebration of John Cena but Cena’s time is up and Cena’s time is now. Theory does some poses but Lashley pops up behind him. Theory loads up the selfie and sees Lashley, who blinds him with the baby oil. The spear cuts Theory down and Lashley promises to take the US Title. Good segment here, as that selfie thing is a good way to go for Theory.

We recap Edge being thrown out of the Judgment Day a few weeks back.

Theory is annoyed about Bobby Lashley, who doesn’t deserve a US Title match. However, Adam Pearce has ruled that if Lashley can win a gauntlet match tonight, he gets the title shot at Money in the Bank. Three opponents to be named.

Jey Uso vs. Angelo Dawkins

Before the match, the Usos promise to keep smashing people and the Street Profits want to fight. Dawkins sends him into the corner to start for a spinning splash. Jey low bridges him to the floor though and there’s the suicide dive. Some right hands rock Dawkins and we take an early break. Back with Jey hitting a pop up neckbreaker for two but walking into the Silencer. A superkick drops Dawkins so Jey goes up top, only to dive into a Sky High for the pin at 7:20.

Rating: C. Not much to this one again and that isn’t surprising. It’s the same idea that we have seen time after time as WWE’s ability to book a tag feud continues to be more or less horrible. This does give the Profits a bit of momentum, but it isn’t like this is some great idea. Just get on with it and give us what should be a nice tag match at the pay per view.

We see Elias in the back playing guitar when Ezekiel comes in to say Elias is his #1 fan. They sit on a couch together, with Elias talking about going around the world, writing songs and playing shows. Elias says he is a changed man and won’t be insulting Nebraska when he goes out there. He is proud of what Ezekiel has done and hits the Walk With Elias catchphrase. They seem cool with each other, despite sitting on very opposite ends of the couch for no adequately explained reason.

Here is Elias in the ring for a concert. After hitting the catchphrase, Elias is ready for a song about Ezekiel but here is Kevin Owens to interrupt. Owens doesn’t buy any of this and accuses them of FAKING THE VIDEO. Owens: “I SAW A MOVIE WITH A T-REX IN IT LAST WEEK!” Ezekiel pops up on screen to say that they are different people and wishes Elias luck with the concert. Owens is a little bewildered and Elias sings about how he is back for one night and Owens is a liar. That’s enough for Owens, who goes after Elias but gets beaten down. The guitar to the back sends Owens bailing.

We cut to the back where Owens falls through the curtain and explains how Elias did all of that and blames Elias for everything. He wants to face Elias, Ezekiel or their younger brother Elrod next week….so here is Ezekiel to accept the challenge. Owens is so mad that he…sits down in a chair. Owens: “ELROD!!!”

Gauntlet Match

Bobby Lashley has to beat three opponents in a row to win here. First up it’s Chad Gable, who gets taken down to the mat without much effort. Back up and Lashley sends him flying with a suplex, followed by a running forearm to knock Gable outside. Gable gets posted and then rather delayed vertical suplexed back inside. The spear is countered into an ankle lock though and Lashley is in trouble. Back up and Gable hits the moonsault, only to have Lashley pop up and grab the Hurt Lock for the tap at 5:42.

Otis comes straight in to jump Lashley though and sends him into the barricade. A splash on the floor crushes Lashley and we take a break. Back with Otis grabbing a neck crank but missing a Vader bomb. The Downward Spiral plants Otis but he fights out of the Hurt Lock. Instead, Lashley hits the spear but Gable comes in for the DQ at 14:22 (total). The beatdown is on until Theory is the third man. Theory hammers away and loads up the A Town Down but Lashley reverses into a cradle for the pin at 16:44.

Rating: C. This is a great example of WWE overthinking something and screwing it up without needing to. You could have gotten the same result and more or less the same match by having this be a handicap with Otis and Gable instead of Theory. Have Theory jump in after the match and get speared or something, which gives you the same ending and no pinfall on the champ. But why do that when you have one idea and insist on running with it?

Bianca Belair isn’t surprised about Carmella getting the title shot and lists off her catchphrases until Carmella jumps her from behind. Belair is so annoyed that she gets up and stares.

It’s time for MizTV, with special guest AJ Styles. After Miz mocks Styles’ theme song, Miz talks about how Styles has been on a losing streak in recent weeks and calls AJ a failure. Miz insults the University of Nebraska but AJ sucks up to them, saying this is Cornhusker country. AJ thinks Miz must be annoyed with his popcorn sized testicles, but Miz insists that this WILL NOT become a thing. He brags about all of his success until AJ talks about how he has had some issues as of late. The brawl is on with Ciampa coming in to knock AJ outside. I like the visual, but do something with Ciampa other than having him start then lose.

Ciampa vs. AJ Styles

Miz is on commentary and Ciampa jumps Styles to start, setting up a running knee to the head. The chinlock goes on but Styles is back with the fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. Ciampa is back with a right hand but the Fairy Tale Ending is countered with a backdrop. The Phenomenal Forearm finishes Ciampa at 4:19.

Rating: C. Another match that should have been better and treated as a big deal but why do that when you can have Ciampa lose again? I know it’s a bunch of backstage politics nonsense, but you look around at the roster and decide that an NXT legend who looks great and can go isn’t worth anything? It’s another case of WWE not just accepting what is right in front of them and that is really, really frustrating.

Post match Styles lays out an invading Miz and steals his sunglasses.

Veer Mahaan talks about how awesome he is and promises more destruction. Fear him. I fear anything involving Veer so they’re off to a good start.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Becky Lynch vs. Asuka

Becky jumps her on the stage but Asuka tries the armbar at the bell. That’s broken up but so is the Disarm-Her, allowing Asuka to kick away. They head up top with Becky knocking her down, only to get caught with a running kick to the face. Becky kicks her outside though and we take a break.

Back with Asuka hitting the hip attack and grabbing the ankle lock. With that broken up, Asuka hits a missile dropkick for two before they head to the apron. Becky stomps her way out of a powerbomb attempt but gets kneed out of the air for the double knockdown. They both beat the count back in, where Asuka blasts her with a kick to the head for the pin at 12:14.

Rating: B-. As usual, there is one match on this show that works because you have some talented people get in the ring and have their match. The problem again though is this is burning through another match between two of the top women in the division when you didn’t need to. Asuka vs. Becky is a big match, but not so much when it has been done so many times.

Becky freaks out to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a good example of a show where the majority of the show wasn’t so much bad, but rather a mixture of frustrating and boring. There was very little on this show that would make me want to see either next week’s show or the pay per view. You had a champion getting pinned when he didn’t need to, a bunch of rematches, a tag match between singles wrestlers and Ciampa losing again. It feels like they were playing Bingo with the most annoying and tried and false ideas that they have over and over again. Nothing show, and that’s a bad sign on the way to Money in the Bank.

Results
Carmella b. Becky Lynch, Asuka, Liv Morgan and Alexa Bliss – Superkick to Morgan
Omos b. Riddle – Chokebomb
Angelo Dawkins b. Jey Uso – Sky High
Bobby Lashley won a gauntlet match last eliminating Theory
AJ Styles b. Ciampa – Phenomenal Forearm
Asuka b. Becky Lynch – Kick to the head

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 13, 2022: Everyone Has A First Time

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 13, 2022
Location: Intrust Bank Arena, Wichita, Kansas
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Jimmy Smith

It’s the first Raw without Cody Rhodes in a bit and that doesn’t exactly leave us with a ton of options. The biggest problem would seem to be the lack of a main event star around here, but maybe we can find someone in the Money in the Bank qualifying matches. Let’s get to it.

Here is last week’s show if you need a recap.

We open with MizTV with special guest Paul Heyman. Miz talks about the Money in the Bank ladder match and puts over how important the briefcase can be, including his two wins. Heyman says that the percentages don’t matter because whoever wins is going to lose to Roman Reigns.

We hear about Reigns vs. Riddle on Friday, so here is Riddle to discuss various testicles. Riddle is ready to win the title on Friday but Heyman doesn’t think Riddle is even going to win tonight. As for Friday though, he can win, or he can never have another title shot ever. Heyman brings out the Usos but here are the Street Profits to uneven the odds.

Jimmy Uso vs. Montez Ford

Feeling out process to start with Jimmy knocking him down and getting a bit cocky. Back up and Ford takes him down with an armbar but Jimmy sends him to the apron and snaps off a suplex to put Ford in even more trouble. We take a break and come back with Jimmy staying on the ribs with a waistlock.

Ford flips out and starts kicking away, including a step up enziguri for two. The spinebuster gets two more on Jimmy but he’s right back with a pop up Samoan drop for the same. Ford is back up with a super hurricanrana to catch Jimmy on top but the frog splash hits knees, allowing Jimmy to get the pin at 12:51.

Rating: C. This was a nice singles match from both though the ending was only so good. I’m not entirely sure I can buy a countered splash as enough for a pin but it does make the impact of the splash look that much better. Ford getting a single match sounds like a good idea, though I’m not sure he’s ready for the singles push that people have been wanting for a long time.

We recap Seth Rollins showing respect to Cody Rhodes last week and then attacking him with a sledgehammer anyway.

We get a sitdown interview with Seth Rollins, who is asked if he feels any remorse over what he did. Of course not, because Rollins sees Cody as a virus. Sometimes you have to take matters into his own hands, like Rollins has a sledgehammer in his own hands. As for tonight, he wants to qualify for Money in the Bank and suggests using that sledgehammer on AJ Styles. Cue Styles to forearm Rollins, saying that was for Cody.

We look back at Dana Brooke beating Becky Lynch last week.

24/7 Title: Becky Lynch vs. Dana Brooke

Brooke is defending but gets jumped before the bell. Becky beats her down and says this isn’t about the 24/7 Title because she is tired of the disrespect. She thinks she should just win that Money in the Bank briefcase but for now, she’ll go after Brooke again. Cue Asuka for the brawl and Becky is cleared out. No match.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Alexa Bliss/Liv Morgan vs. Nikki Ash/Doudrop

Nikki now has new black and gold gear. Bliss takes Ash to start but it’s quickly off to Doudrop, who isn’t having anything of a headscissors. A backsplash crushes Bliss for two and it’s back to Nikki to hammer away. Nikki’s running bulldog is countered and it’s off to Morgan to clean house. Morgan hits a middle rope dropkick for two on Doudrop, allowing the tag back to Bliss for the running Blockbuster. Ash makes a fast save and everything breaks down, with a side slam/reverse DDT combination getting two on Bliss. The fight goes to the floor but Bliss grabs a DDT to finish Ash at 4:21.

Rating: C-. Not terrible here, but the important part is getting two potential Money in the Bank winners to qualify at the same time. There were a lot of spots to fill and now they have two more covered in the span of one match. That is more than you get most of the time, even if there was little doubt given who was on the other side of the ring.

We recap the Judgment Day shakeup from last week with Finn Balor knocking Edge out and seeming to take over.

Kevin Owens vs. Ezekiel

Owens knocks him into the corner and hits a Cannonball, setting up the Swanton for two at twenty seconds. Ezekiel is back and knocks Owens to the floor to take over, setting up a spinebuster for two back inside. That lets Ezekiel go up but Owens rolls away, which means Ezekiel goes outside with him.

An AA onto the steps knocks Owens silly and we take a break. Back with Owens holding a chinlock until his backsplash only hits Ezekiel’s raised knees. Ezekiel hits a running splash in the corner, followed by a jumping knee to put Owens on the floor again. Owens gets in a shot of his own but stops to yell at commentary, meaning Ezekiel wins by countout at 8:31.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one as the structure was all over the place, with Owens starting so fast and then losing when he got too annoyed. The problem was that Ezekiel got in a bunch of offense in the middle and it wasn’t close to a squash. The action was ok, but the match wound up being a mess.

Post match Ezekiel says he wants Money in the Bank, but before that there is next week….and Elias will be back.

Video on John Cena visiting a non-verbal refugee in the Netherlands.

MVP vs. Cedric Alexander

Omos is here with MVP. Before the match, MVP says Alexander needs to learn that he is down here and Omos is up here, with the Money In The Bank briefcase. Cedric knocks him down to start and there’s the springboard Downward Spiral for an early two. An Omos distraction lets MVP hit a clothesline and Ballin gets two more. The Playmaker gives MVP the pin at 1:31.

AJ Styles is ready to beat Seth Rollins in a Money in the Bank qualifying match.

Rollins dedicates his match to Cody Rhodes.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Seth Rollins vs. AJ Styles

Styles slugs away to start and grabs some early rollups for two each. Rollins gets in a shot of his own but AJ sends him outside, setting up the slingshot forearm to the floor to drop Rollins again. Styles gets sent over the announcers’ table though and we take a break. Back with Styles striking away, setting up the belly to back faceplant for two. The low superkick gives Rollins the same but the Stomp is countered into the Calf Crusher.

That’s broken up but AJ grabs it again, this time sending Rollins over to the ropes. Back up and Rollins hits a discus forearm, only to have his buckle bomb countered into a suplex into the corner. Rollins is fine enough to hit the Buckle Bomb but the frog splash only hits mat. The Styles Clash is loaded up but Rollins reverses into a sunset flip for the pin at 15:11.

Rating: B. We’ll call this another case of “what were you expecting”. These two could probably have a very good match in their sleep and that is what they did here, with Rollins winning to get back on track and Styles putting over someone else who is already a big star. That is kind of Styles’ thing as of late but at least Styles is done with Edge for the time being.

Riddle vs. Ciampa

Miz is on commentary. Riddle takes him down into a cross armbreaker to start, only to be sent into the corner for his efforts. Ciampa comes back with a shot of his own but has to escape Bro Derek. Another shot runs Riddle down but he wins a strike off and hits the Orton scoop powerslam. The hanging DDT gets the same but Ciampa grabs an ankle lock. The running knee to the face gives Ciampa two but Riddle hits his own knee. The RKO finishes Ciampa at 4:35.

Rating: C. What is Ciampa supposed to be in WWE? He is a big enough star that he is consistently on Raw and some people seem to think something of him, but he has been treated as a loser for weeks. What was the point in bringing him up if this is the best they have for him? Other than crushing another HHH guy of course.

Bianca Belair is sick of Rhea Ripley and promises to shut her up at Money In The Bank. Judgment Day pops up on screen to recap getting rid of Edge and seems rather happy with it. Ripley promises to take the Women’s Title from Belair.

Theory is ready to beat Bobby Lashley in a pose down tonight.

John Cena is back in two weeks.

Chad Gable vs. Mustafa Ali

Otis is here with Gable, who takes Ali down without much effort. Ali hurricanranas him into an armdrag but he misses a charge into the middle buckle for a nasty crash. The bow and arrow hold goes on but Ali slips out without much trouble. Gable misses the moonsault though, allowing Ali to hit a running clothesline. The tornado DDT connects but Otis offers a distraction, allowing Gable to hit Chaos Theory for the pin at 3:44.

Rating: C+. I’m glad to see Ali back on TV but I don’t think there is any reason to believe that things are going to get better for him than this. WWE is not going to give Ali much of a chance to do anything after his disagreement with the company and while it is sad, it certainly isn’t that surprising. I mean, he’s losing to Gable on Raw. How much worse can it be?

We look back at Veer Mahaan taking out Dominik Mysterio.

Veer Mahaan vs. Rey Mysterio

Dominik is here too. Rey goes for the leg to start but gets taken down with a single shot. Veer sends him chest first to the floor for the crash, followed by the chest first whip into the corner back inside. A missed charge sends Veer into the post and out to the floor, where he beats up Dominik for fun. Back in and Veer spins him into a faceplant, setting up the Cervical Clutch to make Rey tap at 3:39.

Rating: C. If there is a point coming to this seemingly never ending feud, I’m not seeing it. Mahaan has wrecked both Mysterios multiple times now but for some reason we are seeing it again and again. How long are they supposed to do it before WWE gives up? So far it has been two plus months, so I guess about that long plus.

And now, a pose down between Bobby Lashley and Theory. They both get to do the same three poses, with Theory looking fine but being outmatched. Lashley wins, but Theory sprays baby oil in his eyes and dropkicks him. This could have been a segment at 9:14 on any given week and far from the closing of Raw.

Overall Rating: C-. This was right back to the norm for Raw: a bunch of stuff that we have covered before without anything that you really need to see. Couple that with a pretty dreadful last half hour and there was no reason to care about this show. Money in the Bank got a little build, but I still have no idea why I should want to see a bunch of qualifying matches for a ladder match for a title shot that might not have happened a year from now.

Results
Jey Uso b. Montez Ford – Countered frog splash
Liv Morgan/Alexa Bliss b. Doudrop/Nikki Ash – DDT to Ash
Ezekiel b. Kevin Owens via countout
MVP b. Cedric Alexander – Playmaker
Seth Rollins b. AJ Styles – Sunset flip
Riddle b. Ciampa – RKO
Chad Gable b. Mustafa Ali – Rolling Chaos Theory
Veer Mahaan b. Rey Mysterio – Cervical Clutch

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 30, 2022: In A Word, Frustrating

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 30, 2022
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith

It’s the go home show for Hell In A Cell and there are four matches announced for the card. I’m not sure what they are waiting for with adding on more matches, but you have to think that something takes place this week. However, it is also Memorial Day, meaning there is a good chance that very little is going to happen here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Becky Lynch to get things going. She hasn’t been out here to start things off in a bit and she knows the people here are glad she has lost everything. Lynch doesn’t care what these people think, because she collects enemies. We flash back to Money in the Bank 2020, with Asuka winning the briefcase. Then Lynch handed her the Raw Women’s Title because she had to go become a mother.

That made Asuka a selfish monster….and here is Asuka to interrupt. She mocks Becky for being a baby and promises to win the title on Sunday. Cue Bianca Belair, who isn’t happy with Asuka kicking her last week and isn’t too fond of Becky either. She is sure the title isn’t going anywhere though and the fight is on, with Asuka hip attacking Becky to the floor, leaving the other two in the ring.

Asuka vs. Bianca Belair

Non-title and Becky Lynch is on commentary. They flip and jump over each other to start until Asuka kicks her in the ribs. Back up and Belair gets to the middle rope where she, as always, tells Asuka what she can kiss. After the backflip over Asuka, Belair gets pulled down for a kneebar, followed by a guillotine choke. That’s reversed into a suplex for two but another suplex sends both of them crashing to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Asuka hitting a German suplex into the running hip attack for two. Belair catches her on top though, only to moonsault backwards, allowing Asuka to hit a middle rope dropkick for two. A missed charge in the corner lets Belair try the KOD, but Asuka flips out and lands on her feet. Asuka comes up holding her knee though (Becky is VERY pleased) and needs a breather on the floor. Back in and a quick knee gives Asuka two but the Asuka Lock is countered. Asuka tries a rollup, which is quickly stacked up to give Belair the pin at 13:05.

Rating: C+. This match and the last segment let me figure out what I don’t care for with Belair. Her matches are usually good (this one was) and she can do things no one else can do, but none of her matches feel natural. Every time she does something it feels like it’s “ok, time to do this” or “this is where I do thing #3”. Between the kiss it deal or the moonsault off the ropes or the dance or whatever, it feels like she is walking step by step through a script that was planned in advance. It feels robotic and very rarely does she shake that off.

Post match Becky comes in and lays them both out.

Mysterios/Ezekiel vs. Kevin Owens/Alpha Academy

Gable headlocks Rey to start but can’t hold onto him, allowing Dominik to come in instead. Dominik takes Gable to the corner and runs the ropes for a wristdrag. Everything breaks down and a triple dropkick sends Otis outside. Gable knocks Dominik off the ropes though and a whip sends him into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Rey dropkicking Owens to break up a Sharpshooter, allowing the tag to Ezekiel. Everything breaks down and Ezekiel cleans house with some Stinger Splashes. A spinning powerbomb gets two on Gable and a hurricanrana sets up a missed 610 on Owens. That leaves Owens to superkick Gable by mistake and it’s a double 619 to rock Gable again. Ezekiel’s spinning suplex finishes Gable at 8:32.

Rating: C+. Pretty nice action here and that shouldn’t be a surprise. Owens losing it more and more over Ezekiel is some nice stuff, even if it makes me want to watch Bobby Heenan trying to find out who Giant Machine really is. I’m still not caring about the Mysterios all that much, but at least it’s better than watching them deal with Veer Mahaan.

Post match Owens is ticked and wrecks the announcers’ table as the Academy isn’t pleased.

We recap Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins.

Here is Cody for a chat. Cody talks about having the potential to do great things and how his father knew how to see that potential in others. His father told him about the potential in Seth Rollins and then one day Cody was facing Rollins at Wrestlemania. That made Cody nervous, because he couldn’t come back with a loss. Cody didn’t lose there and he didn’t lose at Wrestlemania Backlash.

Now they’re going to the Cell and Cody is going to be able to lose all of his self control because Rollins will be locked inside with a man who wants to hurt him. Cue Rollins to interrupt through the crowd to say he just doesn’t like Cody. All Rollins hears in his sleep is CODY CODY CODY and he can’t stand it any longer.

Six years ago, Cody left WWE and found some friends who wanted to tear down everything Rollins built. Now Cody is back, but he doesn’t get to tear down Rollins’ kingdom. You don’t get to take a sledgehammer to Rollins’ throne and then try to take it from him. On Sunday, Rollins is going to end him and we can wake up from this American nightmare. Cody asks what is stopping him from coming after Seth right now.

Rollins seems to have reality set in on him and Cody takes the jacket off. Rollins comes to the barricade but turns away, only to have Cody come a charging. They fight back to ringside with Cody driving him through the barricade. Referees break it up but they keep fighting, then referees break it up but they keep fighting. They’re finally split apart and kept apart as the fans approve. As they should, as this was the kind of personal brawl that they needed. Rollins now has given a reason to hate Cody and that opens things up a lot more. Good stuff.

Doudrop vs. Alexa Bliss

Nikki Ash is here with Doudrop. Bliss gets powered into the corner and taken down for an early two. Back up and Bliss headscissors her into the corner, setting up a some basement dropkicks. Doudrop runs her over again but misses a Vader Bomb, allowing Bliss to go up, take out Ash, and hit Twisted Bliss for the pin at 3:17.

Rating: D+. I can’t get over how ridiculous the Nikki visuals are, as you have Bliss in the standard (or close enough) gear, Doudrop as the monster, and Ash still in the superhero gear. The match itself was your usual big vs. little match, which only kind of works most of the time. I don’t quite buy Bliss pinning Doudrop after a splash but it isn’t like Doudrop has meant anything in months.

Last week, MVP beat Bobby Lashley and made the Lashley vs. Omos match on Sunday into a handicap match.

It’s time for MizTV, because it feels like we have one of these every week. Miz plugs the season premiere of MizTV next week but here are the Street Profits to interrupt. They talk about Hell in a Cell on Sunday and hype up the card but realize they need to ask Miz about the show. Miz is ready to answer but IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT HE THINKS. Miz puts his hand up and they mock him asking what that means.

Then the 24/7 goons come running in and the Profits get involved as well. It turns into a multi person brawl until Tamina hits a Samoan drop on Dana Brooke to win the title. Tamina picks Akira Tozawa up and kisses him, only to get taken down in a backslide to give Tozawa the pin and the title. So what in the world was the original point of this segment again?

We recap Mustafa Ali’s issues since he came back to WWE as he tries to win the US Title.

Mustafa Ali vs. Ciampa

Theory is on commentary and if Ali wins, he gets a US Title shot. Ali sends him into the corner to start but Ciampa is right back with a knee to the face for two. Ciampa elbows him down and grabs a chinlock before stomping on Ali’s head. The second chinlock doesn’t last as long as Ali is back up with a kick to the face to send Ciampa outside. There’s a suicide dive, with Ali almost going head first into the announcers’ table. Ali goes up but Theory pulls him off the ropes for the DQ at 3:24.

Rating: C-. Well at least Ciampa didn’t get pinned again. I know it’s false hope but my goodness I was hoping he could do SOMETHING on the show. Instead, he might as well be in the corner to my left, because he is little more than a background guy while the real stars are out there. Nothing match, but at least Ali and Theory are getting to do something.

Post match, Theory lays out Ali and says we’ll do the title match right now. Oh and Ciampa disappeared because he means nothing.

US Title: Theory vs. Mustafa Ali

Theory is defending and Ali pulls himself up, only to get thrown back down. A whip into the corner rocks Ali again but he manages a superkick. Ali goes up but gets crotched, setting up the A Town Down to retain the title at 1:43.

Hold on though as here is Adam Pearce to say let’s run it back on Sunday.

Riddle and Shinsuke Nakamura dub themselves the Bronin and Ronin and promise to take the Tag Team Titles.

Usos vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Riddle

Non-title but a CHAMPIONS CONTENDERS match. Jey gets taken into the wrong corner to start and it’s time for alternating kicks to put him in trouble. That’s broken up and it’s off to Jimmy for a Samoan drop. Jey comes back in to whip Riddle hard into the corner but another kick gets Riddle out of trouble. Nakamura comes back in with Good Vibrations to Jimmy. There’s the sliding German suplex but Jey comes back in to cut Nakamura off. The Superfly Splash gives Jey two and we take a break.

Back with Nakamura getting over to Riddle for the hot tag but the hanging DDT is broken up. Nakamura tags himself back in as Riddle is being suplexed to the floor and it’s Kinshasa to Jey. Jimmy makes a save to leave everyone down but it’s Riddle back in with the snap powerslams. Now the hanging DDT can plant Jey, only to have Jimmy hit Riddle with the scooter for the DQ at 11:35.

Rating: C+. Thirty minutes or so? Is that how long it was since they did THE EXACT SAME ENDING? You have a match for a title shot and someone gets disqualified to earn said title shot and they do it TWICE IN THREE MATCHES??? That is another level of lame booking and I can’t even be shocked that they did it. The match itself was good as you probably expected, but that ending was so dumb that it took away any interest I had in what they were doing.

Post match Nakamura breaks up the double Superfly Splash and Riddle hits the super RKO on Jimmy.

Mustafa Ali is ready for his title match on Sunday. He keeps getting knocked down but he is going keep getting back up and win the US Title in his hometown. Then Theory jumps him again and takes a selfie with the title over Ali. Normally this would set up a big title win for Ali, but I’d hope you aren’t that gullible.

Hell In A Cell rundown, including Judgment Day vs. AJ Styles/Finn Balor/Liv Morgan.

Video on Memorial Day.

Liv Morgan vs. Rhea Ripley

Morgan has been standing in the ring for about ten minutes now, following Ali’s promo, the pay per view rundown, a commercial and the Memorial Day video. Ripley had it better, having only stood there for the commercial and Memorial Day video. Morgan gets knocked into the corner to start but comes back with a choke. Some rams into the corner can’t break it up so Ripley drops backwards onto her for the real break. Ripley takes it to the floor and puts Liv on the apron, only to get caught in a hurricanrana. That isn’t working for Morgan either though as she gets dropped on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Morgan in trouble as Damian Priest and AJ Styles are at ringside. Ripley yells about how Liv dragged her down to her level as I would like to again point out YOU WERE A TEAM FOR A MONTH AND A HALF! STOP ACTING LIKE IT WAS SOMETHING! Morgan fights up and sends her outside for a high crossbody but Priest trips Morgan up. Styles cuts that off and Morgan reverses Riptide into a Backstabber for the pin at 10:08.

Rating: C-. Sure why not. You have Ripley, who is FINALLY getting pushed as the monster that she should be and she loses to perennial loser Liv Morgan to set up a six person tag on Sunday. Morgan even overcomes the interference to win to make it even worse. I’m sure Ripley will be fine, but my goodness stop giving people losses like this and the acting like they mean nothing.

Post match Priest takes out Styles. Cue Finn Balor to take him out, allowing Morgan to dropkick Ripley so our plucky band of heroes can stand tall.

We look at the Cody/Seth brawl again.

And now, a contract signing because yes, this is how we’re ending the show. Bobby Lashley, Omos and MVP all come to the ring with Adam Pearce in charge. MVP promises to destroy Lashley in the Cell and says there is no Almighty Era without him. This Sunday, it ends once and for all. MVP signs and he hands it to Omos to do the same. Lashley says he never needed MVP but MVP says he’s talking too much so sign the contract.

The contract is signed and Pearce goes to wrap it up but MVP says we’re not waiting for Sunday. Security comes in and are cleared out just as fast…and here is Cedric Alexander to help take Lashley down. That’s fine with Lashley, who drops Alexander but gets kicked in the face by Omos. A table is set up in the corner and Omos loads up the powerslam, only to have Lashley slip out and spear him through it to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a great example of a show where the wrestling itself worked but everything else dragged it down. Having two matches end in DQ to set up title matches, with a title match squeezed in between, is hardly thought out planning and they kept the dumb rolling by having Morgan beat Ripley. If you want to do something with Morgan, send out ANYONE other than Ripley for her to beat. Were Sonya Deville and Carmella busy?

That being said, there were good parts of the show, including the Cody vs. Seth brawl and a fair few of the matches. The problem, as usual, was most of that last hour, as it is clear that they are front loading the show and ending it with the lamer stuff. That makes for a very long time to wrap things up and that was the case again here. While there was good wrestling, it was surrounded by stuff that was either annoying or just bad, and that makes for a pretty frustrating show.

Results
Bianca Belair b. Asuka – Rollup
Mysterios/Ezekiel b. Kevin Owens/Alpha Academy – Twisting suplex to Gable
Alexa Bliss b. Doudrop – Twisted Bliss
Mustafa Ali b. Ciampa via DQ when Theory interfered
Theory b. Mustafa Ali – A Town Down
Riddle/Shinsuke Nakamura b. Usos via DQ when Jimmy used the scooter
Liv Morgan b. Rhea Ripley – Backstabber

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 16, 2022: Plans Change

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 16, 2022
Location: Scope Arena, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re in for a big grudge match with Omos vs. Bobby Lashley inside a cage. This is the third match between the two of them after they split the first two, though I’m not sure if it’s the best idea with the Cell pay per view a few weeks away. Other than that, we will probably get another push towards the Usos vs. RKBro on Friday, which will totally be the big conclusive ending. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Omos vs. Bobby Lashley.

Here’s what’s coming on the rest of the show.

Omos vs. Bobby Lashley

Inside a cage with MVP in Omos’ corner. Before the match, MVP runs down the history and goes over the ways you can win the match (pinfall, submission, escape) before promising a lot of violence. Hold on though as Cedric Alexander jumps Lashley from behind in the aisle and the big brawl is on. We take a break and come back with the opening bell, as Lashley hammers away until MVP gets in a cheap shot from the floor.

Lashley grabs a choke anyway but Omos hits him in the chest to break that up. Another MVP cheap shot lets Omos choke away and then take it into the corner for a running splash. MVP tries to interfere again but Lashley grabs him by the arm for a ram into the cage. The spear takes Omos down for two and Lashley elbows him in the face. Lashley looks ready to finish but has to cut off Cedric Alexander, who is pulled down into the cage. Omos boots Lashley in the face and throws him through the cage, allowing Lashley to step outside and win at 7:32.

Rating: C-. This felt like the last third (or even half) of a cage match but they were so rushed through everything that almost nothing had a chance to make an impact. They had a seven minute match with multiple interferences and a screwy finish. I know they’re a bit rushed, but could you slow down at least a little bit? The ending was a good way to protect Omos, but Lashley was going even with him throughout at worst so I’m not sure how much the protection helps anyway.

Long recap of Mustafa Ali vs. Miz/Theory.

Theory vs. Mustafa Ali

Non-title….and Theory says hang on a second. He thinks we need a special referee for this match, so here is Miz to replace the referee already in the ring. Hold on again though as Theory is using Vince McMahon’s advice of “expect the unexpected”. Therefore, Ali has a different opponent.

Veer Mahaan vs. Mustafa Ali

Miz is guest referee. Ali goes after him to start but gets knocked away. Some superkicks stagger Veer so Theory trips Ali up (Miz doesn’t mind). Veer gets low bridged to the floor and some dropkicks make it worse, but Miz gets in the way of Ali’s dive. Miz shoves Ali and the distraction lets Veer hit the Million Dollar Arm. The Cervical Clutch finishes for Mahaan at 2:47, as Ali’s punishment continues.

Post match the beating continues but the Mysterios run out for the save and knock Mahaan off the apron. The throw everyone else in the pot feud continues.

Becky Lynch has seen Sasha Banks and Naomi leaving the building before the Six Pack Challenge. Lynch is going to just be the new #1 contender and takes the night off, but Adam Pearce makes Lynch vs. Asuka for the #1 contendership tonight instead. So they advertised a Six Pack Challenge and then changed it inside of 50 minutes. That’s a new mark even for them.

Riddle vs. Jimmy Uso

Jey Uso is here with his brother but there is no Randy Orton because of a family commitment. Jimmy starts with the kicks but gets caught in a triangle choke to the floor. A Jey distraction breaks up the apron kick though, meaning Riddle kicks Jey instead. Jimmy gets in a dive and Riddle is sent into the steps as we take a break. Back with Jimmy hitting another enziguri, setting up the running Umaga Attack for two.

The chinlock goes on but Riddle is back up with a few shots of his own. As the Countdown To Cody clock comes up (before his ten o’clock appearance), the pop up Samoan drop gives Jimmy two. Jimmy goes up top but has to break up the super RKO attempt, only to have the Superfly Splash hit knees. A rollup has Riddle in trouble but the referee catches the interference, earning Jey an ejection. Riddle small packages Jimmy for the pin at 10:32.

Rating: C+. I wasn’t all that interested when the match was another tag match preview between two singles wrestlers but at least it wound up being pretty good. Riddle beating the Usos on his own doesn’t exactly make the Usos look great, but maybe they have something better planned for Smackdown. I still don’t buy the titles being unified on TV, though Friday should have the big fight feeling.

Video on AJ Styles/Finn Balor/Liv Morgan’s lack of luck against the Judgment Day.

Earlier today, Morgan was upset about Rhea Ripley when Los Lotharios came in to offer her a spot in the Kiss Cam. That’s a no, but AJ Styles and Finn Balor came in to chase them off. The guys offer her a spot in their corner tonight but she’ll think about it.

The Judgment Day is rather happy with how everything is going but Edge knows that there are some people who want in. They know everyone wants power, so anyone who wants to come in and move to the next level is welcome. It could even be you, AJ Styles. They could use his athleticism, so join him on top of the mountain. Either be by their side or at their feet, because they aren’t stopping.

AJ Styles/Finn Balor vs. Los Lotharios

Liv Morgan is here with Styles and Balor, apparently having made up her mind at some point today, because saying “I’m in” was too much to ask. Humberto actually stomps Styles down into the corner to start and it’s off to Angel to pound on the back. The abdominal stretch goes on, with Humberto getting in a kick to the ribs for a bonus. Styles fights up and brings in Balor to clean house, setting up the double slingshot dives to send us to a break.

Back with Humberto working on a half crab before Angel comes in for a double half crab. Styles powers out and brings in Balor to clean house. Angel actually cuts that off with a superkick and hands it back to Humberto. The moonsault hits raised boots (with Humberto taking a huge bump off the impact) and it’s the shotgun dropkick to Humberto in the corner. AJ Phenomenal Forearms Angel and it’s the Coup de Grace to finish Humberto at 9:15.

Rating: C+. Los Lotharios are a good team most of the time but in this case, they went with the right call of having AJ and Balor take them down. There is almost no way to imagine a midcard team beating a pair of former World Champions so don’t bother going nuts with it. At least it should be good when Balor or Styles joins up with Edge and company.

Too Sweeting ensues after the match.

Kevin Owens, in a Sami Zayn Forever shirt, meets the Alpha Academy, who has the results of Ezekiel’s DNA tests. They open the envelope….but the results have been contaminated by the presence of BARBECUE SAUCE on the sample. Otis is immediately blamed but Gable tries to keep things calm. Next weeks, Gable promises to expose Ezekiel for the fraud that he is. Tonight though, Gable is going to beat it out of him in the ring. Owens: “THAT’S WHAT YOU SAY EVERY WEEK!”

We recap Sonya Deville losing her job as a WWE boss last week, followed by losing to Alexa Bliss in about thirty seconds.

Alexa Bliss vs. Sonya Deville

Deville gets slapped in the face to start as the match has already lasted longer than last week’s. Bliss takes her down with a legsweep but misses the standing moonsault. A running knee gives Deville two and the chinlock goes on. Another running knee blasts Bliss so Deville goes to unhook a turnbuckle pad. The distracted referee misses Deville hitting a clean spinebuster but runs over for a delayed two. Bliss hits a DDT for the pin at 4:01.

Rating: C-. They had a bit of something here with the delayed cover, but it’s hard to get into the idea of Deville being screwed over. She was more interesting when she was serious a few years ago, and the idea of her getting what happened to her over and over again is only going to get so much of my attention. The match itself wasn’t great, but Bliss is still probably shaking off some ring rust.

Post match Deville yells at the referee and then slaps him.

We recap Seth Rollins attacking Cody Rhodes and Stomping him on the announcers’ table.

Here is Cody Rhodes for a chat. He has been told that Seth Rollins is not here tonight but he hopes that Rollins is listening. Last week, Rollins poured gasoline on the fire but the reality is that Rollins is his own biggest threat. Rollins has built his own purgatory and wants to pull Rhodes down in with him. We flash back to 2011, when Rollins arrived with the rest of the Shield, with Rhodes as one of the bitter guys in the back. Rollins went on a rocket to the top by shattering the glass ceiling, which Rhodes never knew was there in the first place.

Rhodes’ story is a little different. He lost a lot and worked his way up, even if he was looking at the lights most nights. Now he has a second chance, and he isn’t taking it for granted. Rollins isn’t denying him a second chance so Rollins will have to kill him. So let’s run it back one more time…..inside the Cell. Rollins, who seems to be backstage, pops up to say Rhodes is nuts because anyone inside that Cell with him is changed. The match is on. I’d again like to point out that Rhodes has looked and sounded like a star since he returned. That makes all the difference in the world.

Asuka is giddy about getting to face Becky Lynch tonight.

Ezekiel vs. Chad Gable

Kevin Owens is on commentary and Otis is in Gable’s corner. Before the match, Owens doesn’t want to see a photo of Ezekiel and Elias together. Gable takes him down by the arm to start but Ezekiel is back up with an armdrag. That doesn’t work for Gable, who wants some SHOOSHING, only to have Ezekiel come back with a Gory Stretch. Gable slips out and gets into the ropes, with Ezekiel being sent outside.

Otis drives Ezekiel into the apron and we take a break. Back with Gable working on the arm but Ezekiel comes up with a clothesline. A spinebuster gets two and the jumping knee gets the same. Gable sends him into the corner for two but Ezekiel comes out with a kick to the chest. Otis’ distraction lets Gable grab a rollup, which is reversed into another rollup to give Ezekiel the pin at 10:59.

Rating: C. The more I see of Ezekiel, the more I like him. It isn’t like Elias was tearing the house down every week in the ring so there isn’t much of a bar to clear. Ezekiel had a perfectly watchable match here and is different enough than Elias to make it a bit more interesting. Not exactly a classic, but Ezekiel is an interesting enough change of pace for the time being.

R-Truth finally serves Akira Tozawa with his divorce papers and then runs off. Dana Brooke comes in to thank Truth for serving Reggie last week, but Truth wants to consummate with the 24/7 Title. Dana runs off and bumps into Carmella. Insults ensue, including Dana saying Carmella hasn’t mattered since the Guy With No Chin was here. Truth runs up and asks Carmella for help getting the title back. Sure, but she wants Dana Brooke when the time is right. As we continue adding people to this thing.

Here is Lacey Evans, who is introduced as a mother, daughter, Marine and more. Evans puts over the military and thanks them for everything they do. She is proud of what she has done and knows she has a long way to go, but no one in the back is any better than she is. I’m still not sure what they’re doing with Evans and I don’t think WWE does either.

Riddle is ready for the Usos.

The Usos are ready for Riddle.

Becky Lynch vs. Asuka

The winner gets a shot at Bianca Belair, at ringside, at Hell In A Cell. Becky starts fast but gets caught with the running hip attack on the apron. They go to the floor, where Becky hits a suplex into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Asuka getting two off a backslide and kicking Becky in the head. A knee to the face sets up a German suplex and a sliding knee gives Asuka two.

Becky gets in a running shot of her own for two and frustration begins to set in. A rollup is countered into the Asuka Lock but Becky flips backwards for the cover to escape. The cross armbreaker sends Becky to the ropes so she heads outside to yell at Belair. Asuka follows her out, earning herself a whip into Belair. That’s enough to bring Belair to the apron, allowing Becky to grab Asuka’s umbrella. That takes a bit too long though and it’s the green mist into a buzzsaw kick to give Asuka the pin at 9:52.

Rating: B-. They didn’t have time to get great here but it was a good win to build Asuka back up and get her ready for the title match next month. Becky’s slide continues, but she is so far and away established as a top star that it doesn’t matter. This felt like a big enough main event, though I could go for the pay per view version again.

The referee doesn’t seem interested in the fact that Lynch is green to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t exactly a strong show but the whole ordeal with Naomi/Sasha Banks walking out kind of turned parts of the show upside down. They started moving towards the Cell, but I still don’t know what the biggest match on the show is supposed to be. That is the problem with the lack of a World Champion, though it is likely to stay that way for a long time to come. For now, this worked well enough, even if nothing was exactly a show stealing classic. They still don’t have the terrible stuff and that is an important level to reach.

Results
Bobby Lashley b. Omos – Lashley escaped the cage
Veer Mahaan b. Mustafa Ali – Cervical Clutch
Riddle b. Jimmy Uso – Small package
AJ Styles/Finn Balor b. Los Lotharios – Coup de Grace to Humberto
Alexa Bliss b. Sonya Deville – DDT
Ezekiel b. Chad Gable – Rollup
Asuka b. Becky Lynch – Kick to the head

 

 

 

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXXIV (2019 Redo): Round Two

Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Chloe x Hallie

I’m not sure if it’s because I was in the stadium last year or something else, but this show was actually a bit more memorable than the previous few editions. Hopefully it’s just as good watching it back but you never can tell with these things. Brock Lesnar is defending the Universal Title against Roman Reigns in the main event because of course he is so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

JR and Jerry Lawler come out for commentary with Byron Saxton for a bit of a feel good moment. It’s a brawl to start with English getting backdropped out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Anderson dumps Konnor and Ziggler starts his tradition of hanging on to avoid elimination. There goes Hawkins as we still need to clear out a lot of the ring. Former partners R-Truth and Goldust shake hands with Goldust eliminating him, cutting off JR’s Bearcat Wright’s references.

Primo is out next as there’s almost nothing between these eliminations. Kanellis gets tossed and Ziggler hangs on again. Things settle down a bit unto Apollo knees Breeze as JR mocks Ziggler for always having to save himself. Viktor is gone too and the Revival beats on Ryder but he’s right back up. The Broski Boot is loaded up on Ziggler (JR: “Ziggler in trouble. Again.”) but Rawley Pounces Ryder out in a nice touch. A Liger kick from Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows as we take a break.

Apollo getting backdropped out and Benjamin follows him…and let’s look at the announcers. We come back with Rhyno and the Revival gone and Kane eliminating Axel and Dallas. And now, we look at John Cena in the crowd as a fan, because I had forgotten about that stupid story. Back with Sin Cara eliminated by Corbin and Fandango dancing at Kane, earning himself an elimination off a single uppercut.

Corbin gets rid of Slater and Kane eliminates Gable, leaving us with the big power showdown. Everyone else jumps the monsters and it’s a superkick to Titus, setting a clothesline to get rid of him. We’re down to Corbin, Dillinger, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Hardy and Kane as Goldust loads up Shattered Dreams on Dillinger. That’s broken up by Ziggler so Goldust ties him up for Shattered Dreams as well. Dillinger takes the kick but Ziggler eliminates Goldust.

That leaves us with a TEN vs. DELETE battle with a Twist of Fate and Dillinger is gone. Kane tosses Ziggler but gets eliminated by Corbin to get us down to Corbin, Hardy and Rawley. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the villains go for the elimination….but here’s the returning Bray Wyatt for Sister Abigail into an elimination for Rawley. Corbin drops Wyatt but gets backdropped out to give Matt the win at 16:36.

Rating: D+. It was a battle royal that got a lot of time and wasn’t all that interesting. The ending was a cool moment and it’s the best way to get everyone on the card, even if most of these people mean a grand total of nothing. It’s not a good match or even anything memorable, but at least it got the crowd warmed up….with an hour to go before the show itself starts.

Post match Matt thanks Bray and we get a hug, which JR deems a Wrestlemania moment.

Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

Tournament final to crown a new champion after Enzo Amore was finally banished. Ali debuts his SubZero look, which he still uses a year later. They’re both very happy to be there and slaps hands before getting started. Cedric scores with a shoulder block but gets headscissored down as the announcers are right there to play up the power vs. speed idea, though you don’t exactly think of power when it comes to Alexander.

Now the 054 connects for two, the first time the move has ever only gotten a near fall. Another 054 misses and it’s a pair of spinning back elbows to Ali’s face. A third turns Ali inside out and the Lumbar Check makes Cedric champion at 12:21. Cedric immediately hugs the unconscious Ali in a nice show of sportsmanship.

Rating: B. I was pulling for Ali but it felt like a title match between two guys fighting with everything they had. Cedric was the favorite in the entire tournament but Ali came off looking like a star the whole way through. This was rather good stuff and should have been the Kickoff Show main event, though I’ll take a good match when I can.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Dana Brooke, Becky Lynch, Sarah Logan, Lana, Bianca Belair, Naomi, Sonya Deville, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Peyton Royce, Natalya, Dakota Kai, Mickie James, Taynara Conti, Ruby Riott, Kairi Sane, Sasha Banks, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Bayley

This was going to be the Fabulous Moolah Memorial Battle Royal but history intervened and it’s just a regular battle royal this time around. Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary and the former has some advice: don’t get thrown over the top rope. Becky comes out first, everyone else comes out, followed by Sasha and Bayley to fill out the field. Miss Money in the Bank Carmella (erg) poses with the briefcase to start and everyone gangs up on her for the easy elimination.

Deville, who got the elimination, poses in the big circle of women but Dana gets thrown in the middle instead. That means trash talk from Brooke and the big beatdown is on with Mandy tossing Dana. The NXT women team up to send the main roster women outside (through the ropes rather than over, which I can’t stand in battle royals) so we can get the WE ARE NXT pose.

Becky yells at Devi about orange being HER COLOR as some of the main roster women get back in. Kai eliminates Mandy as Paige declares Deville her favorite member of Absolution. We stop for the NXT women to triple team Deville, setting up Belair’s 450, because THAT MAKES SENSE IN A BATTLE ROYAL! Deville is out and we take a break, coming back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow thanks to more ganging up on Riott during the break.

Lana and Devi are tossed and Conti gets kicked out by the Squad. Becky and Belair have a less than thrilling slugout and the hair whip is incredibly loud. Belair misses a charge though and gets kicked out, followed by Kai kicking Naomi in the face. Banks gets rid of Kai without much effort and there goes Becky to a chorus of boos (I think Becky will be fine). Ruby knocks Mickie out and it’s Royce’s turn to kick people in the face.

Logan powerbombs her out as well though and we’re down to Morgan, Logan, Riott, Bayley, Banks, Natalya and Naomi, who is out on the floor (oh dear). For some reason Natalya decides to pose with her back turned to the Squad but manages to suplex Ruby and Sarah at the same time.

Bayley saves Sasha from a suplex and helps get rid of Natalya. Morgan is out as well and there goes Ruby. Banks sends Logan to the apron and Bayley knocks her out, leaving us with Banks and Bayley. The fans actually get on their feet to cheer for this one and the handshake…lets Bayley throw Banks out to a big reaction but Naomi gets back in for the Rear View. That’s enough for the win at 9:39.

Rating: F+. I had forgotten how annoying that ending was but it makes you realize just how stupid this whole thing was. Bayley and Banks would go on to have their weird semi-feud and then partnership over the year while Naomi has done NOTHING important since this match. You have something here with Bayley and the bright idea is to do the HAHA WE TRICKED YOU ending? That’s been done to death in battle royals and it’s not like this was anything more than a surprise ending, which was really stupid given how Bayley had been searching for anything important for the last year. This actually ticked me off again so well done.

Jojo introduces Chloe and Hallie to sing America the Beautiful, describing them as the “future of music”. Well if Jojo says it then it must be true.

The opening video shows shots of parties in New Orleans and, just like in 2014, features a tagline of Let The Good Times Roll. They couldn’t come up with anything else in four years? And the theme song is still Celebrate by Kid Rock. Ok it’s a catchy song, but is there nothing else (or no one else) that they could use?

Yay pyro! And cool set with the Mardi Gras mask, which looked awesome all night long.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the lower bowl and looking not quite directly at the far post on the right side opposite the hard camera.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and we get the new idea this year: 3D graphics for some of the entrances, including Miz who gets the Miz logo and various words to describe him, including MOVIE STAR. Miz sends the Miztourage to the back because he wants to do this himself for his newborn daughter. The weird part is you couldn’t see those in the stadium (obviously) but you could see them on the screens around the building, which made your head snap around a few times.

Balor isn’t the Demon here, but instead comes out with a bunch of LGBT people in rainbow Balor Club shirts labeled FOR EVERYONE. If nothing else, it’s awesome to see the stadium doing the Balor pose at once. This was set up with both guys beating Miz in one night, because Balor beating Miz after Miz had a long match with Rollins is totally the same thing.

They all go for the way too early rollups to start with Miz being sent outside. That means Rollins can miss a Stomp on Balor but a superkick to the ribs works just fine. Balor sends Rollins outside though and it’s the big running flip dive onto both of them for the first major pop of the night. Back in and basement dropkick gives Balor two on Miz but Rollins is back in with a high crossbody.

Miz finally gets to do something other than get beaten up as we look at Cena in the crowd again. Rollins grabs a double Blockbuster for two on Miz but he’s right back up with a knee to the ribs (not face Cole). The chinlock goes on, which shouldn’t be the case less than four minutes into a triple threat. Back up and a neckbreaker gets two on Miz as they’re just trading moves until we get to the big stuff. Another chinlock seems to annoy Balor so he gets up again and hits the double stomp to Miz’s ribs.

Rollins is back in for a Sling Blade to Balor, setting up a suicide dive to Balor and Miz. A superkick drops Balor again but Miz comes in with a DDT for two. Miz goes with the strategy by bending Balor’s knee around the ropes and slapping on the Figure Four. The frog splash from Rollins (from out of nowhere for an awesome visual) breaks it up and all three of them head outside.

Balor escapes the barricade powerbomb and dropkicks them both into the barricade instead. Back in again and 1916 gets two on Rollins but Miz breaks up the Coup de Grace. Instead of the Tower of Doom though it’s the buckle bomb to Miz and a superplex into the Falcon Arrow to Balor. The Skull Crushing Finale gives Miz two on Rollins and they’re all down again.

Balor does his hop over the ropes in the corner but gets crotched for trying the Coup de Grace again. It’s just not working this time dude. Miz goes up top with Balor and catches a springboarding Rollins with something close to a super Skull Crushing Finale. Balor breaks it up with a Coup de Grace and hits a second on Miz but the Stomp breaks that up too. Another Stomp hits Miz to give Rollins the pin and the title at 15:37.

Rating: B-. This might have been a few minutes too long but Rollins winning was a fine call as he’s more than over enough and kind of fits the Workrate Champion idea to perfection. Miz can come back and break the all time days record later and Balor is over no matter what. Not a great match, but a very hot opener and the fans were into everything here.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match, which is billed as the BIGGEST WOMEN’S MATCH IN WRESTLEMANIA HISTORY. My how times change. Anyway Charlotte is the queen of everything and Asuka won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot. It’s absolutely a dream match with Charlotte being Charlotte and Asuka still being undefeated.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and gets the full Ric Flair theme song, complete with a HHH from Wrestlemania XXX inspired entrance, meaning soldiers to help her off a throne and take her robe. Asuka on the other hand gets the CGI masks with rainbow colored lines surrounding them, which look cool on screen but live….not so much. They lock up to start and take turns flipping out of wristlocks for an early standoff.

Charlotte loads up a monkey flip but instead trips the leg for a failed Figure Eight attempt. You can feel the intensity here and it’s working well so far. Some chops to the chest (and one to the face) have Asuka in trouble but she’s right back with a hip attack to knock Charlotte outside. Back in and it’s time to start in on the arm but Charlotte gets in a backbreaker into an STO. Charlotte uses a Backpack Stunner to get out of a sleeper and a knee to the back of the head keeps Asuka in trouble.

It’s enough trouble for Charlotte to go up top for the moonsault….which is countered into a triangle for a sweet escape. Charlotte reverses into a Boston crab until Asuka makes the rope. A sliding kick to the face knocks Charlotte backwards and it’s back to the arm as Asuka continues to follow her game plan. They head to the apron with Asuka suplexing her out to the floor in a good looking crash. Sometimes you need to just go with a big spot like that and it worked very well.

Back in and they stare each other down until Asuka just erupts with strikes to the face. A missile dropkick gets two and Asuka stomps on the back. Charlotte is fine enough for the chops to catch Asuka on top and it’s a super Spanish Fly for two with the fans getting much more into things in a hurry. Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold from Asuka’s back for a cool change of pace.

Charlotte tries to flip out and into the Figure Eight but Asuka kicks her in the head for a block. Well that’s certainly to the point. The Asuka Lock is blocked and Charlotte hits a very good spear for two more as the fans are WAY into this. With nothing else working, Charlotte goes to the Figure Eight and bridges up with one arm….and Asuka taps at 13:05 in a shocker.

Rating: A-. I don’t get shocked by results very often but I was actually stunned to see how this went. I would have bet money on Asuka walking out as champion here but Charlotte winning was far from a ridiculous result. Now the problem is what this did to Asuka, as she only started to recover from the loss nearly a year later. Charlotte would lose the title to Carmella two days later, bringing some dark days to the belt. This however was anything but dark, with an outstanding match between two stars.

Post match Asuka gets the mic and says Charlotte was ready for her in the ultimate sign of respect.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something that makes him get out of his seat and run up the ramp. You really couldn’t wait until the women were gone so they could have the full moment?

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Orton is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Aiden English (now bald, meaning he shaved his head since the end of the battle royal when he had hair) handles Rusev’s entrance and we get my favorite shot every year: a closeup of someone with the camera swinging around to show the stadium crowd in front of them. There’s something so cool about seeing just how big of a stage they’re really on. Anyway, Rusev is crazy over and easily the crowd favorite. Does anyone else see an issue with Orton’s music saying “I hear voices in my head” while his Titantron says IN MY VEINS?

While you think about that, Orton and Mahal are sent outside, leaving Rusev to dropkick (yes dropkick) Roode to the floor. A RUSEV DAY Cannonball off the apron takes Orton and Mahal down again but Roode is back in with a Blockbuster for two on Rusev. The other two get back in and it’s Mahal getting beaten up by Orton and Roode before being tossed right back to the floor. Orton hits the top rope superplex on Roode with Rusev and Mahal diving back in for the save.

That’s enough for Mahal to ask Rusev for a partnership but Rusev doesn’t even bother waiting before hitting Mahal with a spinning belly to back suplex for two. Roode makes it worse by busting Mahal’s spine and hitting the GLORIOUS pose, only to have Orton make a save this time.

That leaves Orton alone in the ring and it’s the hanging DDT on Rusev. The RKO hits English, Rusev and Mahal so it’s Roode making a save of his own. Roode blocks the RKO and plants Orton with the Glorious DDT as Mahal saves. The Machka Kick drops Mahal but Sunil Singh offers a distraction, letting Mahal hit the Khallas for the pin on Rusev at 8:14. You could literally feel the energy go out of the crowd.

Rating: D+. There was some hard work in there but this was the definition of Vince saying screw the audience because it’s all about what I want. Rusev was one of the most popular guys in the company and had been for months but instead we get Mahal, who was an all time bomb as WWE Champion getting to pin Rusev.

It’s not like there was even a long term plan as Mahal would lose the title a mere eight days later. Rusev would indeed get the title nearly nine months later, after his popularity had fallen way down, meaning it was acceptable to give the fans what they want. This really hurt the show and it’s going to be hard to recover.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon and yeah I think this might help the recovery process. After being at Wrestlemania XXXI and attacking Stephanie, Rousey made her official WWE debut at the Royal Rumble earlier in the year. She wanted to go to Wrestlemania and since she was (at the time) the most dominant female UFC fighter of all time, Stephanie wanted to mold her into a WWE star.

Angle, who had been screwed over by Stephanie and HHH before, warned Ronda that they would mess with her too. That didn’t sit well with Rousey, who beat both of them up on the way to this mixed tag match. Naturally we got a lot of Stephanie workout videos because she’s STEPHANIE and that makes her some wrestling legend. It’s sickening, and I was waiting on her to survive the armbar in the match. It was clear that this was going to be full of smoke and mirrors, but the question is how well Rousey is going to do in her debut. This is one of the main events of the show and something a lot of people really wanted to see.

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles (flanked by four women on their own motorcycles), with Stephanie’s biker look (including the leather pants) making me a lot less annoyed at her. Cole: “Even though Stephanie is a former Women’s Champion, this is her Wrestlemania in-ring debut!” WWE pretending that Stephanie was a wrestler is one of their more interesting character tweaks. Rousey gets a huge reaction and of course smiles at the crowd, as is her custom. Cole talks about two people starting in UFC and coming to WWE: Ken Shamrock and now Rousey. So they’re not Dan Severn fans either?

The fans are WAY behind Rousey as they stare each other down in the middle. Stephanie shoves Rousey in the face because Stephanie just never learns. A hair pull doesn’t prove to be the brightest idea either so Stephanie bails to the apron so the guys can start us off. Angle (very badly) punches at HHH and the beating is on in the corner. A hammerlock keeps HHH does as we’re just waiting for this to explode as it should be doing.

Stephanie manages to lure Rousey in though and Angle gets low bridged to the floor. Cole calls this “that McMahon instinct” as the worship is already a lot to take. Angle gets sent into the steps and Rousey is about to lose it because she can’t intervene. Some more cheap shots from Stephanie keep Rousey angry and a spinebuster gives HHH two. A front facelock keeps Angle down but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Stephanie chokes Angle and HHH nearly hits her by mistake but it’s still too early for the hot tag. A suplex drops HHH again but Stephanie runs around and pulls Rousey off the apron. HHH gets whipped over the corner for the real crash and you can see the panic in Stephanie. The hot tag brings in Rousey (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!!!”) who SPRINTS over to Stephanie and throws her down with a suplex. After the required tug of the shorts, Rousey unloads with rights and lefts in the corner as the fans are already losing it. The release throw sends Stephanie back into the corner and Graves is terrified.

The fans want and receive the armbar….but Stephanie blocks it. Yes the hold that UFC fighters were powerless again is a simple block for Stephanie as the crowd’s soul is slapped down again. Stephanie blocks it a second time and rakes the eyes (Cole: “Complete manipulation of the rules!” Ignore the complete manipulation of reality and focus on those rules man.”), setting up a double arm crank as the fans try to process that they’re really doing this.

Stephanie even mocks Rousey, who grabs her by the throat and hits the swinging Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee. Rousey: “I’m going to continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls her out as well, apparently not a fan of such chatty opponents. Angle is back up and sends HHH over the announcers’ table but gets thrown onto the Spanish table. After a slow crawl, HHH is back in and sees Rousey, who is ready to fight. HHH puts the referee in the corner and sizes Rousey up and the beating is on in the corner.

A legsweep looks to set up the swinging Samoan drop but Stephanie makes a save. I know I’m not a big HHH fan a lot of the time but he just made Rousey look like the biggest star in the history of the division. Rousey chases Stephanie outside though and has to adjust the gear again, allowing Stephanie to post her. Angle is back in for some belly to belly suplexes and the rolling Germans but the ankle lock is countered. The Pedigree is countered as well and HHH gets catapulted into the corner, setting up the Angle Slam for two with no one making a save.

Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock and yells at Angle, who catches the boot to the ribs. HHH has to save his wife and Pedigrees Angle for two with Rousey making her own save this time. With Angle down, HHH loads Rousey up for a powerbomb but gets hurricanranaed (!) into the armbar on HHH (I completely bought that as the finish live) until Stephanie grabs a choke.

That’s reversed into an armbar and Stephanie has the gall to block it AGAIN. Angle ankle locks HHH, who rolls Angle into Rousey for the real save. Rousey and Angle get posted and it’s time for stereo Pedigrees, both of which are broken up. The armbar is slapped on again and this time Rousey uses the leverage to pull back and Stephanie finally taps at 20:37.

Rating: A. That’s not even on a sliding scale because Rousey knocked that out harder than she knocked out Alexis Davis. She looked like she’s been doing this for ten years and had one of the best debut matches I’ve ever seen. Everyone else was nailing it too and I got completely sucked into it both live and watching it back because all of the stuff was that good. Don’t have Stephanie block the armbar so often and this is an A+ easy.

That was the only downgrade, even though you knew full well it was coming. To be fair though, Stephanie did tap out clean in the end so it wasn’t the most ridiculous thing ever. Well the first part was but not the finish. After this, how can you now see Rousey as the star that she already was?

Stephanie has to be helped out, as she should. She would get armbarred again the next night for a bonus.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Kofi wastes no time in hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jey but Harper pulls him outside before the count. Jimmy gets sent into the steps and Harper crashes against Big E. against the barricade. With no one else to beat up, Woods gets powerbombed against the post, leaving Rowan to splash Kofi and Jey back inside. The mostly done Jey is thrown outside and Big E. gets knocked off the apron. Jimmy comes back in for a pair of superkicks and Jey is back up for stereo kicks to Harper’s head in the corner.

A jumping enziguri hits Harper and a superkick knocks Rowan to the floor, setting up a double suplex on the outside. Harper catches Kofi with a swinging release Boss Man Slam but gets caught with a double superkick on top. Rowan breaks up the Tower of Doom so Kofi charges at Harper, only to get powerbombed by Rowan. An assisted super sitout powerbomb finishes Kofi to give Harper and Rowan the titles at 5:55.

Rating: C-. The time cuts aside, this wasn’t the worst match in the world with the Usos and the New Day giving it all they had against the monsters but not being able to stop them. The Bludgeon Brothers were the first time a team other than the Usos or New Day had held the belts in over a year so this was long, long overdue and the right call.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network, most of which actually happened for a change.

Here’s a fired up John Cena for his match with Undertaker. This comes after weeks of Cena calling out Undertaker for Wrestlemania because Undertaker seemingly retired after last year’s show. Cena came off as the biggest jerk in this feud and acting like Undertaker owed him something. There was no confirmation that Undertaker was going to be here, hence him sitting in the crowd earlier.

That’s the other stupid part of the whole thing: Cena kept talking about how he had no path to Wrestlemania, because JOHN CENA couldn’t get a match. He gave some lame excuse about how this was the only match that mattered and it didn’t do a thing to make up for the consistently annoying lines from commentary about Cena possibly being left out of Wrestlemania. I get what they were going for, but come on already.

Anyway Cena is ready to go but here’s a referee to say not so fast. Cena is disappointed and the lights go out. It’s only Elias though and Cena heads back to his seat as Elias sings about it being his night. That’s enough for Cena who runs in and beats Elias up before looking disappointed again. Cole: “I guess that would be a Wrestlemania moment right?” He goes up the ramp but stops….and the lights go out again. A spotlight hits the ring with Undertaker’s hat, coat and boots, which are hit by lighting (looks awful on the Network, looked great when you didn’t see it coming in the stadium. They’re gone, and the gong strikes.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

I know he’s been old for ten years, but that entrance live, especially in the stadium, is chilling. Cole of course can’t SHUT UP, saying everything he can think of, including calling them the two greatest performers of all time. Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner to start and hits the jumping clothesline. Old School connects and Undertaker hits some running clotheslines in the corner. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the big leg have Cena rocked but the chokeslam is escaped.

Cena’s belly to back connects but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, making Cena fall down in fear. The chokeslam into the Tombstone finishes Cena at 2:48. The more I think of this one, the more I like it. Cena ran his mouth for so long and Undertaker annihilated him here, just as he should have. While a lot of people will be annoyed at not getting a full form match between these two, I’d rather they do this than have Undertaker look back in a fifteen minute match.

Video on the Hall of Fame ceremony.

Here’s the Hall of Fame Class, which really doesn’t need to air on the show. They already get a whole evening to themselves. Do we really need ten minutes on Wrestlemania too?

Jeff Jarrett (eh sure, though it’s still weird to see him here)

Mark Henry (still not sure on him, though his documentary was great)

Hillbilly Jim (I’m a Kentucky boy but come on)

Ivory (she looks better now than she did during her career)

Jarius JJ Robertson (Warrior Award)

Dudley Boyz (yep)

Goldberg (yep, though I’d call the Dudleys more appropriate headliners)

Oh and Kid Rock, this year’s celebrity inductee, wasn’t there because he had a concert.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens. Bryan somehow overcame his injuries and returned to the ring in something I still can barely believe. Owens and Zayn had tormented Smackdown boss Shane for months and then attacked Bryan for firing them the night he was announced as being cleared. Therefore it’s a tag match with Owens and Zayn fighting for their jobs. Yeah that’s all well and good. The point here is Bryan actually getting back in the ring, which is almost impossible to imagine.

Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon

Owens and Zayn beat McMahon up on Smackdown to cover for Shane’s legitimate medical issues. Chris Jericho was apparently on red phone alert for this show with a plan to have him fly in from a Fozzy show on the corporate jet in case Shane couldn’t make the show. Bryan gets a special entrance with a weird military/Terminator themed video showing a target on the Superdome before looking at the YES Movement spreading throughout the world in a cool moment. You can feel the emotions in Bryan as he comes down the aisle and it’s an amazing sight to behold.

Owens and Zayn jump the good guys from behind and Shane gets thrown over the barricade. Bryan takes a Helluva kick and the apron powerbomb to leave him laying. Medics come out to check on Bryan as yes, they actually are trying to stretch this out even further. Shane is willing to fight on his own and unloads with the really bad punches to Owens in the corner.

There’s the jumping back elbow but Shane grabs his stomach due to the diverticulitis (the same thing that ruined Lesnar’s UFC career). A DDT drops Sami but Owens gets in a shot to the stomach to cut Shane off. We settle down into a regular match with Sami elbowing the ribs and going for one cover after another. Owens steps on the ribs and applauds Bryan for such a great return. A t-bone suplex gives Sami two and a superkick into the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The fans don’t care about this whatsoever and there’s no reason for them to.

With Bryan STILL being tended to at ringside, it’s just a big waiting game until Bryan gets back up and makes the hot tag. The Helluva Kick misses in the corner and Sami gets tied in the Tree of Woe. Coast to Coast hits but Shane can’t follow up because of the stomach. Owens drops the frog splash on Shane but Bryan dives in for the save to bring the fans back to life. The hot tag is cut off though and we hit the chinlock to make the fans wait a little longer. A belly to back suplex gets Shane out of trouble though and there’s the tag, with Bryan taking his time before getting in for an awesome moment.

House is cleaned and it’s the moonsault over Sami into the running clothesline. Owens comes back in and Bryan gets them in opposite corners for alternating running dropkicks. Sami is back with a Helluva Kick for two on Bryan and Owens superkicks Shane to the floor. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets two more and Owens is shocked at the kickout. Shane dives onto Owens, leaving Sami to yell at Bryan for coming back and punch him in the face. That’s enough for Bryan and the fight is on, including the YES Kicks. The running knee sets up the YES Lock to make Sami tap at 15:24.

Rating: C+. This was two matches in one with the rather boring beatdown of Shane for the first half before Bryan came in and gave the fans exactly what they wanted for the second half. It was all about Bryan and that’s all it was supposed to be. The idea that he actually made it back to the ring is amazing and one of the most surprising stories you’ll ever see in wrestling. He deserved a big moment like this and that’s what we got here, albeit after Shane got in his own time of course.

Attendance announcement, with pyro because it’s Wrestlemania.

We recap Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss. They were friends, but Jax found out that Bliss was making fun of her behind her back. Jax went into monster mode and chased after Bliss and her friend Mickie James, setting up this match. Now there’s no reason this shouldn’t be about thirty seconds long, but it’s Wrestlemania and what matters is getting on the card and having a long match instead of doing what makes sense.

Raw Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax

Bliss, with James in her corner, is defending and is lowered down to the stage on a platform for a nice touch. We get the Big Match Intros and Bliss immediately backs up as she should. Jax gets smart and runs Mickie over before the bell rings to send her outside for a heck of a beatdown. Bliss tries to intervene and gets glared back to the ring, leaving James to take a Samoan drop on the floor.

We get back inside for the opening bell and Bliss slaps her in the face. That earns a scream from Nia so Bliss screams back in true scream queen fashion. A gorilla press slam has Bliss bailing to the floor and it’s time to leave, only to have Nia run her over again. Back in and Bliss pokes her in the eye before going after the knee in a smart move.

What’s not a smart move is this match already going nearly three minutes with Bliss getting in any significant offense. A basement dropkick keeps Jax in trouble but a guillotine choke is easily countered via an overhead belly to belly suplex. Jax goes shoulder first into the post as the fans are quiet all over again. Twisted Bliss to a standing Nia on the floor gives Bliss another knockdown, setting up the short DDT for two back inside.

Bliss yells at her so Nia tells her to shut up already and the destruction begins. Another poke to the eye is no sold and Bliss gets whipped hard into the buckles. Bliss goes to the eye again to get out of the Samoan drop but Jax drives her into the corner and then drops her. That’s not enough as it’s a super Samoan drop to give Jax the pin and the title at 9:02.

Rating: D-. What were they thinking here? The whole story was that Bliss was all talk and survived because of Nia but then she hangs with Nia for the better part of ten minutes? This should have been thirty seconds long with Bliss getting the title back later on (as she did in June) after coming back from getting squashed. Just a bad idea all around here, save for Jax FINALLY winning the title.

We recap AJ Styles defending the Smackdown World Title against Shinsuke Nakamura. They had a classic match in Japan and a lot of fans wanted to see it again in WWE. Nakamura won the Royal Rumble and the match was on, with both guys trying to get in the other’s head on the way to New Orleans. So yeah, they’re just going with “it’s a dream match” for the build, which works just fine.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by Nita Strauss (awesome guitar player and rather gorgeous at the same time). The army of violinists and drummers help too. Since WWE can’t go more than five minutes without making some kind of a mistake, AJ is billed as Universal Champion. They lock up to start with Nakamura getting the better of it with some knees to the ribs.

Good Vibrations is blocked and AJ gets in his own knee before starting in on the back. Styles grabs a chinlock for a bit before dropkicking him to the floor. That’s not the best idea though as it’s a kick to the head to stagger Styles and the champ is in trouble for the first time. Nakamura’s middle rope kick to the face gets two and that’s a COME ON to set up the strikes to the face.

The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two but AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant. A sliding forearm into the pumphandle gutbuster gets two on Nakamura as they’re trading big spots. AJ’s springboard is countered into the Landslide (Samoan driver) for two but Nakamura needs a minute before following up. With nothing else working, Nakamura goes with the kicks, which are countered into the Calf Crusher.

Since it’s Nakamura, that’s reversed into a triangle choke, which AJ powers into something like a fisherman’s buster for another double knockdown. It’s Nakamura up first and trying a running knee in the corner but the bad knee hit the buckle instead. AJ is right back with a Phenomenal Forearm for two in the required kickout of the first finisher.

The springboard 450 hits knees and Nakamura grabs a small package for two of his own. They slug it out until AJ nails the Pele but can’t follow up, allowing Nakamura to knee him in the back of the head for a much nearer fall. The reverse exploder looks to set up the Kinshasa but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin to retain at 20:21.

Rating: B+. This was close to being a classic but it’s really just a very good match instead. Part of the problem here is how late the match came in the show. The fans were starting to get worn down and there was only so much energy left in the people. Also it never quite got to the epic level that they were shooting for with Nakamura never really getting the close near falls that he needed to take it to another level. Still that, very good and worthy of a Wrestlemania title match.

We recap the Kickoff Show. This is another few minutes that could be cut off.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

The Bar is defending after Strowman won a battle royal to become #1 contenders despite not having a partner. Therefore the big question for over a month is who would the partner be. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float, complete with people in large headed costumes for a cool visual. There’s no partner for Strowman, who breaks up the float before coming to the ring.

Strowman and the kid get in the ring where the kid is introduced as Nicholas (the son of referee John Cone). Cole: “This is really happening.” He’s never been more right. Oh and the search for a partner and introduction took about four and a half minutes, again because this show can just keep going. Strowman takes Sheamus into the corner with no problem to start before beating up Cesaro as well.

Nicholas is terrified (as he should be) as Cesaro dropkicks Strowman in the knee. A double suplex lets Sheamus drop a top rope knee, setting up an assisted swanton from Sheamus’ shoulders. Strowman comes back with a double crossbody and backdrops Sheamus over the top, bouncing him off the post in the process. To cap it off, Strowman tags Nicholas in. The kid is terrified and tags Strowman back in for the powerslam to Cesaro for the pin and the titles at 3:58.

Rating: F. I….what do you want from me here? This was an idea that completely failed because WWE had no idea what to do here and this is all they could do. Put Heath Slater or someone in there, or have Strowman do a rendition of Me And My Shadow and have him win it by himself. It was a joke that was literally forgotten the next night and stretched the show out even more because they couldn’t just cut this and put Strowman ANYWHERE else. I’m sure Matt Hardy had to win the battle royal right?

Wrestlemania 35 is in New York/Jersey. You don’t hear New Jersey mentioned here, but I guess it’s just implied.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. It’s the latest attempt to make Reigns feel like the mega star because the first few times didn’t take. Therefore he won the Elimination Chamber (beating Strowman after Strowman eliminated everyone else), THIS TIME FOR SURE! Lesnar has been champion for a year and barely ever defends the title, because that was so successful the first few times. Their fights over the last few weeks get the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and WOW the fans are not happy to see him. To make it a little better, Brock drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs, followed by the German suplexes. Reigns pops up with a Superman Punch to send Brock to the floor as they’re starting fast again. Back in and a clothesline knocks Lesnar over the top and out to the floor as the fans chant things to amuse themselves.

Lesnar catches him with a belly to belly on the floor and another one drops Reigns on his head. There’s the required CM PUNK chant and a third belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table because Brock didn’t realize how much room he had. Back in and Lesnar throws another German suplex, declaring it SUPLEX CITY B****. More suplexes ensue because that’s what Lesnar does in a big time match. Brock gets tired of that and loads up the announcers’ table but Reigns posts him for a much needed breather.

A spear puts Lesnar onto (not through) another table as the fans boo the heck out of this. Or maybe they’re mad about losing a beach ball. The Superman Punch into a pair of spears gets two and now the fans are definitely happy with a beach ball. Brock blocks a spear with a knee to the face that brings Graves out of his chair.

The first F5 gets two and virtually no reaction from the crowd. Another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. To switch it up, another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. The fans declare it boring so Lesnar takes him outside for the fourth F5 through the announcers’ table. Lesnar takes it back inside and stands there as the fans do something else in the crowd that goes from cheering to booing during the same closeup.

The fifth F5 gets two so Lesnar takes the gloves off at Heyman’s orders. The fans call it awful as Lesnar hammers away to bust Reigns open. It’s quite the gusher but Reigns slips out of the F5 and hits a pair of spears for two. Another spear is countered into the sixth F5 to retain the title at 15:51.

Rating: D+. Well of course he does. The problem here is that there is good action in the match but it’s too much of the same stuff and the fans having none of it that took away its value. Couple that with knowing that we’re just waiting on even more Reigns title shots and promos about needing to be champion and there was no way this was going to work. The fans (including myself) were done with this WAY before the match started and that’s all there was to it.

Reigns gets cleaned up and we get the long video package. Back in the stadium, Reigns leaves and the show ends. I stood around for a long time while this was going on because the video doesn’t play in the stadium and it wasn’t clear if the show was over or not.

Overall Rating: C-. I know I (and a lot of other people) say it over and over but it’s just too long. There is a limit to how long you can sit watching wrestling in person or at home and Wrestlemania has blown past that for years now. At some point you just stop caring and there’s very little that can be done to fix such a problem. They need to do something because this isn’t going to work no matter what they do. Cut out a lot of stuff and it’s a great show, but the whole package didn’t work.

There’s a lot of good stuff in here, such as the opener, AJ vs. Nakamura, Charlotte vs. Asuka, the mixed tag and a few other moments here and there. The problem is there’s so much other stuff that either doesn’t work (the main event, the Raw Women’s Title match and the Raw Tag Team Titles are great places to start) that it really doesn’t work. Get rid of some of that and the show is that much better.

Overall, it comes down to the problem of WWE not listening to the fans. They can throw out as much good content as they want, but if you do it to annoy the fans (the US Title match) or to stretch things out even further past its expiration point (the Universal Title), it’s going to come back to mess things up. There is so much on here that fans don’t want to see and WWE just won’t fix it.

That doesn’t help the length either. If you have a show where the final match is something the fans do not want to see, you’re going to have them sitting there, already annoyed at other things in the show, for hours waiting to see something that only WWE seems interested in. How is that supposed to be appealing for over seven hours? Cut it down, give us something else to cheer for, and remember that Wrestlemania is supposed to be about the best of the best, not everyone on the roster.

Ratings Comparison

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D-

Redo: D+

Mustafa Ali vs. Cedric Alexander

Original: B-

Redo: B

Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: F+

Seth Rollins vs. The Miz vs. Finn Balor

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Asuka

Original: A-

Redo: A

Jinder Mahal vs. Rusev vs. Randy Orton vs. Bobby Roode

Original: D

Redo: D+

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey

Original: A-

Redo: A

New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B+

Braun Strowman/Nicholas vs. The Bar

Original: F

Redo: F

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C-

This is an interesting one as most of the matches are within the same ballpark but I liked the show a lot better the first time around. Maybe the good was more fun just after the show, but this really didn’t do it for me nearly as well on another viewing. It’s watchable, but definitely not a very good show.

Here’s the original if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/04/14/wrestlemania-xxxiv-the-same-old-story/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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