History of Summerslam Count-Up – 1988: Warrior Cuts The Gordian Knot

As luck would have it, I got the old format back on the day that the Summerslam Count-Up begins.

 

Summerslam 1988
Date: August 29, 1988
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 20,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Billy Graham

The first show. This show was completely capitalizing on WM 4’s tournament with Savage being the victor. Now I’ve heard two separate versions of what the initial main event for this show was supposed to be.

I’ve heard that the original plan for the tournament was to have DiBiase’s master plan (see the WM history thread for details) to have worked and have DiBiase win the belt over Hogan, leading to Savage challenging him here for it and then we get a 6 month Mega Powers angle, or the same one minus Savage holding the belt which I think would have made more sense given some of Hogan’s promos leading up to Mania 5.

The other version that I’ve heard, and the one I give less credit to, was that the plan was to have Flair come in for a feud with Savage leading to a title vs. title match at Summerslam with Savage, ending in either a draw or Flair winning both titles briefly.

I consider this nonsense because according to EVERY other source I’ve heard and based solely on everything that’s been on WWF television during this time period, to say Savage vs. Hogan was locked into Mania 5 is almost like saying Vince has a bit of influence on the way the product is presented. As for the rest of the announced card, there really isn’t one.

I mean literally, there was nothing else announced for the show and the box art on the VHS is Savage/Hogan and DiBiase/Andre, which is the main event, billed as the Mega Powers vs. the Mega Bucks. I’m not putting a lot of faith into the show, but let’s see if it lives up to its 80s awesoemness.

Intro is as painfully bland as any wrestling intro is in the 80s, with the WWF logo flying over water for no particular reason before we get a shot of New York City with Gorilla commentating about the show, saying nothing that you wouldn’t expect him to say. Of course Madison SQUARE Garden is the roundest building you’ll ever see. We get a more standard intro with the four guys in the main event along with Liz and Virgil and Ventura, who is the referee tonight.

This is more like it with the kick ass WWF 80s song in the background. After that we hear our commentators, with Monsoon sounding so completely unexcited about this show that it’s pathetic. Now granted it was a new idea at the time and no one really had a clue if it was going to work or not, but at least try to sound excited please? Graham calls Hogan his hero which makes me laugh as Hogan stole half of Graham’s stuff to make himself the legend he is today.

The crowd is counting down something in the background which I’m guessing is the start of the PPV feed. We go straight from this to the first match, as the heels have no music.

Rougeau Brothers vs. British Bulldogs

Oh yeah now this is what I’m talking about. Clearly I’m talking about it because I’m writing about it as you know because you’re reading this since I guess there’s nothing good on TV. I have to turn off the IC Title DVD for this and I’m on the Shawn/Razor ladder match so I really must love you guys. Apparently the French guys are about to move to the US which gets boos from the crowd which I can’t quite get.

BIG pop for the Bulldogs who I think are about done at this point. Matilda clears the ring. The French dudes are heels that try to convince everyone they’re faces but still cheat in their matches. They would also hug each other WAY too much, and on the infamous occasion, one rubbed a Bushwacker’s balls. Very nice old school tag team match going on here with speed and power for the Brits against speed and cheating from your heels.

This is very solid stuff here and these guys are just beating the heck out of each other using some old school tactics. You get not one but two great beatdowns of one face before the hot tag, leading to the second which just makes this even better. During one of the beatdowns, this one being the one on Dynamite, he’s put into an abdominal stretch and Gorilla starts to complain about it.

For the love of all things good and holy, SHUT UP ABOUT THE STUPID FOOT. I have seen a lot of Monsoon matches and he has complained about the stupid foot being hooked in an abdominal stretch so many times that I want to hurt someone. Dang it let it go. It’s a freaking  rest hold that never wins anything at all. Although, maybe if they hooked the foot they would win with it…Oh screw it now I’m all confused.

Anyway, in the end the faces just start beating the tar out of the heels but they never quite can put them away. That makes both teams look equally strong as one team gets to show off their offensive skills and the other gets to show how resilient they are. That’s a very nice touch that you don’t’ see much anymore. Eventually both teams hit their finishers but only the faces kick out of them.

They don’t win though as just after Dynamite hits the headbutt, the time limit is up and we’re done. The Bulldogs chase the heels down with Graham saying that’s the right thing to do and to finish it in the shower if they have to.

Rating: B. This was a great way to open things up for both the show and the series, but the lack of a real finish hurts it. Both teams looked good here as neither really dominated either part of the match. Both teams were playing to their characteristics very well and all four men looked good. One thing though: I have never seen a match with so many monkey flips. Literally, I saw at least 5 of them and attempts at two or three more. Why so many I wonder?

We see how Ron Bass injured Brutus Beefcake in one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. The idea is that he choked Brutus out and cut him open with a spur. Since we can’t handle a single cut on a guy’s head, a big red X with the word censored across it comes on screen. The problem is, the X doesn’t cover Brutus’ head but more of his chin, leaving the cut completely visible. This means he can’t challenge for the IC belt tonight.

Bad News Brown vs. Ken Patera

O…….k. Patera is one of the more interesting cases you’ll ever find in wrestling. He was legitimately one of the strongest men in the world as he had came in third in the first World’s Strongest Man contest. He was given the IC Title and was going to be given a main event level push and likely the title at one point. Until one night at a McDonald’s however.

He and a Japanese wrestler were refused service for one reason or another which I believe was that the restaurant was closed. Allegedly, Ken threw a rock through the window, although he still denies he did this. Later, the pair was arrested at a hotel but they beat up the cops. He was put in jail for two years and came back as a face to feud with the Heenan Family.

Allegedly, and that should be heavily emphasized, he and Hogan were supposed to main event Mania 4, which I don’t believe for a second as it just would have been awful. Anyway, at this point he just sucked bad and was a jobber to the stars so the ending here is a tad obvious.

This is little more than a squash although Patera is apparently the favorite. It’s only about 6 and a half minutes though so what do you really want here? Both guys are more power guys so the styles are already clashing. Brown is in control for the earlier part of the match and the rest is just Ken trying to lock in a submission for the win because he doesn’t know how to do anything else, which is rather pathetic.

He’s just awful out there as his only moves are the bearhug and the full nelson. He gets one on but the other, the nelson, never happens. Brown wins it after a running enziguri called the Ghetto Blaster which is just a sweet name to say the least.

Rating: D+. This was bad. Patera was just horrible and while Brown was pretty good, there was just way too much of a clash of styles to overcome. It was a good try I guess, but at the end there was just too high of a level of suck to overcome.

WWF is promoting boxing for some reason.

Hogan and Savage say that Elizabeth is their secret weapon. Doesn’t that kind of blow the secret aspect of it?

Rick Rude vs. Junk Yard Dog

Rude is of course a master on the mic as he always is, despite saying the exact same thing every time. At the same time, JYD continues to be the most overrated wrestler I’ve ever been forced to watch. He does nothing of note ever except head butt people. What’s the appeal of that, seriously? Graham says that he practices headbutting cars. Number one, why would Graham know that, and B, what in the world is Graham on?

Neither guy really does anything special here as it’s mainly rest holds and punching. Eventually Rude puts him down and goes to the top rope where he pulls his tights down to show tights with Roberts’ wife on them. This was in the middle of a huge feud with Rude and Roberts.

Rude has a gimmick of picking a woman to kiss before every match. One night he picked Roberts’ wife Cheryl and the kiss had no effect at all. This started the feud because it was apparently Rude’s fault that Cheryl let him kiss her. Anyway, it’s a DQ finish as Roberts runs down and beats up Rude because of the tights thing.

Rating: D. This was somehow worse than the last match. Back to back matches each running about six and a half minutes and both being horrible is a bad way to get a show going after a good time limit draw match. Seriously, Dog was awful as always so at least he’s consistent, Rude wasn’t sure of what he was doing yet, and Roberts had to save the whole thing. That’s never a good sign.

Honky Tonk Man says he doesn’t care who he faces tonight.

Bolsheviks vs. Powers of Pain

The Powers are actually faces at this point and managed by some guy named the Baron. They were pretty badly hated though while Demolition was ridiculously popular, leading to a double switch at Survivor Series. Once again, it’s a clash of styles. Neither team is popular or hated enough to really be cared about here so this is more filler as they’re beginning to acknowledge that this is a very bad card overall and they have no idea what they’re doing.

The Powers are definitely the best team here though and it’s painfully obvious that they’re carrying this thing. The Baron might be the most worthless manager of all time which is saying something as the Russians are managed by Slick. Warlord never once goes off his feet in this which makes the Russians look even weaker. This is a squash despite the Powers never really being in control until the end. Barbarian hits a sweet headbutt from the top for the pin and a surprisingly good pop.

Rating: C+. This was miles better than the previous two squashes as it was actually a squash and not a squash designed to look like a real match. It was designed to make the Powrs look good before the big showdown with Demolition, but the double turn that was absolutely necessary given the circumstances changed those plans in a big hurry.

Survivor Series promo, complete with footage from WM 3, as WWF continues to attempt to crush the NWA which I’ll cover more in detail when we cover the Survivor Series.

Brother Love Show

Hacksaw is your guest. Love was a parody of corrupt televangelists at the time which is really quite funny when you think about it, or at least it is to me. I used to be scared to death of him. Hacksaw might have been the third or fourth biggest face in the company at this time after the Mega Powers and arguably Roberts. Actually, I’d say he was third and even second after February when Savage turned on my first birthday.

Duggan might be the simplest character of all time yet he’s just flat out awesome and so over it’s scary to say the least. More or less he calls out Dino Bravo, saying that he’s not a good Canadian after Love mentions him. He then just yells at Love to scare the heck  out of him which is great because it’s so basic yet so awesome. He looks like this big grizzled mountain man with a stick that he threatens people with as he imposes his will on them. How awesome is that? Duggan chases him off to end this.

Another boxing promo as I guess we’re cross promoting now. Now that I remember it, Leonard was in the front row at Mania 5 and they mention him by name.

Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. Mystery Opponent

This is your famous moment from this show and it’s by far and away the shortest of the matches on the card. Honky was supposed to fight Brutus in a rematch from Mania 4 but he’s hurt so it’s the new #1 contender. Honky still holds the mega record for the IC belt at about 16 months or so. Fink apparently doesn’t know who it is which is stupid as Okerlund knew earlier but Honky didn’t want to know.

Warrior’s music hits and the roof goes off. Warrior beats Honky in about 15 seconds which was just a beatdown. The people are marking out over this and I can’t blame them as Warrior was even more insane back then, making this just freaking sweet to see as Honky was annoying and finally got put into his place. At least he’s not in drag though.

Rating: A+. This is complete and utter perfection for what it was supposed to be. Honky had been the bane of wrestling fans’ existences for about 16 months as he had constantly gotten himself counted out or disqualified to hold onto the title. Warrior just bull rushed him and beat the living tar out of him in like 15 seconds. To say the fans exploded is an understatement. They blew the roof off the place and the moment is absolutely perfect.

Survivor Series 88 is going to be a year after Survivor Series 87. This is three and a half minutes of video from last year’s show. Is there a point to this? I mean we’re getting long clips of it, upwards of 30 straight seconds and a minute a match. They skip the women’s match though as the diva hating started back then. At the end they have Hogan posing, despite him losing that night.

Don Muraco vs. Dino Bravo

Muraco was about done at this point and Bravo was on his way to being about the level that Miz is on at the moment. Yeah, that must have been an intermission. Heenan comes to the broadcast booth before the match to say that the heels in the main event are ready and the faces are terrified. Monsoon throws him out. This is another rematch from the tournament. Heenan comes back.

This match is less about the match and more about Graham and Heenan arguing about who is stronger, despite neither managing either guy. Muraco used to have Graham as his manager and a lot of the criticism comes from an attempt by Bravo at the world bench pressing record at the first Rumble.

He didn’t get it of course but did with Jesse’s help. Yet again, we have a clash of styles but in this one it works a lot better because Muraco can wrestle a technical set well enough to make this work. This only goes about five and a half minutes but they tell a decent little story that ends with Bravo winning with his side suplex.

Rating: B-. This was pretty good I thought. Now it wasn’t a classic, but it was fine for what it was: two power guys hitting each other. It passed the time ok but I wish we had less arguing with the announcers. It was just getting annoying at the end with Graham incessantly whining about how it wasn’t fair.

Holy crap it’s ANOTHER Survivor Series promo. I think WWF is being too subtle here.

Ventura has taken money from DiBiase apparently.

Tag Titles: Demolition vs. Hart Foundation

This is two years before we get what I think is the best PPV tag title match ever. It’s one of the better match on the card so hopefully this is good. The Harts are glorified jobbers here as they’re freshly face and against the monsters known as Demolition. Even though they’re former champions somehow they’re jobbers. That makes limited sense even in wrestling. Jimmy Hart, the former Hart Foundation manager, is a special adviser here.

Axe and Bret start us off here. Billy thinks Bret is the smallest guy out there. Where would we be without his expert wisdom? The Harts speed it up and work on the arm of Smash. Axe kicks Anvil in the back of the head to take over though and the bearded wonder is in trouble. Billy says once they win the tag titles the Harts are going to go outside, grab a girl and do some damage to her. WHAT IS WITH THIS GUY?

Bret gets sent into the post shoulder first and HARD too. That looked very painful and Bret sells it like the master of selling that he is. Neidhart (called Hitman by Billy of course) chases Jimmy to the back as Bret’s arm is destroyed even further. Graham talks about some top rope move Demolition is about to do while Smash just stands there on the apron. Dang I’m getting tired of his idiocy. It’s not even funny.

Hot tag to Anvil after Bret gets a desperation clothesline but of course the referee doesn’t see it. And then he gets the tag like 8 seconds later. I’ve never gotten the point of that. If you’re just going to do it again the next chance you get what’s the point of the false tag? It did add some heat to the second one so maybe that’s it. It would make sense.

Powerslam to Smash gets two. Axe has apparently left to chase an ice cream truck or something as he’s completely gone. Ah there he is to break up a backbreaker from Bret. Fuji is up on the apron but Anvil drills him. The Megaphone from Axe ends this though in a CHEAP ending. That feels like an ending from a house show.

Rating: B-. This was a solid match as you would come to expect from these four. The Harts weren’t very used to being faces at the time as Bret had just turned at Mania. Demolition was so far ahead of them at this point that the Harts got a major rub by hanging with them like this. Solid match, decent length, and so far by miles the best on the card, other than maybe the opening contest.

Honky wants his title back.

Big Boss Man vs. Koko B. Ware

For the love of god we get it about Survivor Series.

Warrior says he’s proud of his little warriors.

Hercules vs. Jake Roberts

Is it filler? Yep, it certainly is. Honestly, is it that hard to have another big match on the card other than the main event? I know there’s got to be something big out there. Why couldn’t it be Roberts vs. Rude in a big match? That would at least be interesting. Heenan not being at ringside means something apparently, as he’s about to leave Hercules to make Herc a face.

It’s a very basic match here until I get a huge laugh as Hercules puts on a chinlock and can clearly be seen calling spots to Jake. Graham deserves a raise for the save he makes by saying that when he was a wrestler and used a hold like this he would be telling his opponent that he was going down and that there was no way he could win.

That my friends, is an announcer covering for a mistake by a wrestler. It’s plausible at least. It’s complete BS, but it’s plausible. Other than getting a good laugh and a surprise after Graham calls a move a bump, this is a pretty bland match. I can almost call every spot before it happens.

Roberts goes for the DDT, he gets backdropped, he misses a running knee, and we move to the next sequence. That’s just not a good sign at all no matter what. Roberts eventually gets the DDT and that means the end.

Rating: C-. My goodness these matches have been bad. I don’t mean the in ring work is bad as it’s been acceptable, but they’re just there. This would be a great house show, but this is a PPV which I guess at the time was fine since no one knew what they were doing with it. This is another match that’s just there. It’s not great but it’s just barely passable.

Far too long of a recap talking about the build for the main event. Part of this is about Jesse being bought off, mainly due to him supposedly being afraid of Andre.

Mega Powers vs. Mega Bucks

The crowd pops big for the announcement as we finally have something good going here. Jesse’s pop is very solid while not being huge. The heels have no music, which is sad considering DiBiase has some of the best music of all time. The pop for the faces is great and amazingly enough they come out to the same music which isn’t Real American. Hogan, actually letting someone else have top billing? WHAT THE HECK???

Liz of course looks insanely good in the red and yellow dress. The start of this takes forever as I guess the WWF wasn’t too hot on the idea of a crowd being into the match so they had to kill it for a bit. Ventura decides to change the location of the tag ropes. Who in the world freaking cares? Hogan just doesn’t look right with writing on his tights. Savage and Andre start which was a big match we never really got the proper version of.

We saw a few of them but never the true showdown we could have gotten. The match is given some time but it’s still less than 14 minutes. It’s what you’d expect from a main event tag though, as the faces start strong leading to a face comeback before the finish. In this case, the finish is pretty famous as the heels knock the faces to the floor and Liz gets up on the apron. She famously takes off her skirt to reveal her underwear and some very nice legs.

This was insane at the time as Liz was always viewed as a lady and for once she’s being viewed as a sex symbol. Anyway, Andre gets knocked down as DiBiase gets the elbow and gets pinned. The pin is funny as Hogan covers after a leg drop and Savage has to shove Ventura’s arm down for the three as he didn’t want to make the count. Post match we get the celebration with Liz in Hogan’s arms which doesn’t sit well with Savage as we plant the seeds for WM 5.

Rating: B. This was fine for a main event tag match as it was all about the biggest feud and biggest team in the company. It also set a very tiny bit of Mania 5 and advanced the major feuds. The wrestling is just what you would expect which is fine. This was perfectly acceptable.

Overall Rating: D+. I know it’s the first of its kind, but this show just flat out sucked. The main event is good and the tag title match was ok but other than that, this was just horrid. It’s a bunch of random matches which meant nothing and no one really wanted to watch. This was like a house show with a title change and a big main event. While obviously the series would improve, this was a very bad start for it. Watch it for the fact that it’s the inaugural Summerslam, but that’s it.

 

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WWWF New York City House Show – August 28, 1978: Night of 1000 Rest Holds

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Date: August 28, 1978
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentator: Vince McMahon

Stan Stasiak vs. Dominic DeNucci

They fight over a full nelson and exchange control of it more than once each. DeNucci finally says screw this and forearms Stasiak in the face. This match has time limit draw written all over it. They slug it out with Stasiak being staggered. Stasiak hooks a hammerlock and they slug it out some more. DeNucci hooks an abdominal stretch which he drops very quickly.

Baron Mikel Scicluna vs. Haystacks Calhoun

Special Delivery Jones vs. Victor Rivera

WWWF World Title: Bob Backlund vs. Ivan Koloff

Bob puts him on the top rope to counter and hooks something like a spinning toehold. Thankfully this one lasts less than the usual two hours with Ivan kicking him in the ribs. Ivan sends him into the ropes but they ram heads, sending Bob to the floor. Koloff is smart and breaks up the count so he can still win the title. Backlund gets rammed into the post and a backbreaker gets two.

Ivan goes up top for the biggest pop (and possibly the only one so far) of the match but his top rope knee drop misses. Backlund sends him in but gets kicked down again, this time back to the floor again. Koloff breaks up the count again, this time by going up top and jumping down onto the apron, kicking Bob in the head on the way down. That would be considered a big spot back then.

Luck Graham vs. Peter Maivia

Dusty Rhodes vs. Billy Graham

Who do you think is defending? Moolah looks very different with black hair. Vicki whips her around by said hair to start and grabs an armbar. Moolah takes her down into a cross armbreaker but Vicki easily counters. That counter sequence goes on for awhile until Moolah says screw this wrestling nonsense and chokes away in the corner. Sunset flip gets two for Vicki. Moolah grabs a rollup out of nowhere for the pin.

Spiros Arion/Yukon Lumberjacks vs. Andre the Giant/Tony Garea/Dino Bravo

WWF Wrestling Challenge – February 14, 1988: There Will Be A Tournament

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Date: February 14, 1988
Location: Wicomico Youth and Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We look at a highlight package from The Main Event. By that I mean about seven minutes out of a nine minute match. We also get the post match reveal of the second Dave Hebner.

DiBiase is wearing the title and says he told us all this would happen but no one believed him. He looks like pure evil with that on him.

The show is almost half over already.

Don Muraco vs. Ken Johnson

We get some highlights of Warrior vs. Hercules last week where the chain was broken.

Islanders vs. Lanny Poffo/Eric Cooper

Tama and Poffo get us going with Lanny working on the arm. Cooper comes in and the beating begins. Gorilla talks about wrestling Sammartino for 94 minutes. Ok then. A suplex/cross body combination pins Cooper quick.

Slick says his men are ready for Mania. Reed and OMG seem confident too.

We get the end of Bigelow vs. Joe Mirto. Ok then.

Honky Tonk Man plugs the WWF Magazine.

Bad News Brown vs. David Stoudemire

Jose Estrada/Dusty Wolfe vs. British Bulldogs

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WWF Wrestling Challenge – February 7, 1988: Steven Richards Approves Of This Show

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Date: February 7, 1988
Location: Wicomico Youth and Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

What a name for a venue. We’re past the Rumble and the Main Event, but only the Rumble had aired when this show was taped. We won’t be into a post Main Event set of tapings until the end of the month so for now all you’re going to hear about is the Rumble (in theory). We’re getting into some very interesting times now though so let’s get to it.

We hear from the arena manager who welcomes us to the arena.

Vince says that the announcers aren’t allowed to talk about the ending of The Main Event. That’s pretty clever actually.

Opening sequence.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hercules

Hercules gets fired up before the match. Heenan is at ringside for this so Vince is alone on commentary. It’s a pre-match posedown because the chain is still in the ring. We’re going to get a tug of war to start. There’s been no contact yet. They keep moving their hands closer and Herc kicks him in the ribs. They keep pulling on the chain and it breaks in half. Herc hits him with half of the chain and the thing is thrown out before it officially starts.

Herc has to be pulled off of Warrior allowing the painted one to come back and choke Hercules to the back. This would result in a Wrestlemania rematch.

Mania is officially announced for Atlantic City at 4pm. We hear about some people who are going to be in the city although not exactly at the show.

Jerry Gray/Rex King vs. The Bolsheviks

Slick is with the Russians here. Heenan is back on commentary here. After the Russian anthem Nikolai goes after Gray. Heenan wants to talk about Indianapolis but he’s not allowed to. Off to Boris who gets pounded in the corner which gets him sent to the floor. Nikolai and King come in and Boris hits King in the back of the head. A double ax to the chest gets the pin. Squash.

Demolition says that Billy Jack Haynes and Ken Patera can’t stop them. They want whoever they can get their hands on, but they especially want the new champions, Strike Force.

Bad News is back next week.

Gino Carabella/Brian Costello vs Young Stallions

Roma and I think Costello start things off. Powers comes in with a sunset flip and it’s back to Roma. Heenan talks about hanging out with Donald Trump. The jobbers double team Roma but the Stallions make a blind tag. Roma (I think the illegal man) pins Costello with a belly to belly suplex.

Slick and the One Man Gang say that the Gang will win the world title this coming year.

The Bulldogs say thank you for your get well wishes to Matilda.

Rick Rude vs. Brady Boone

These two went to high school together actually. Boone jumps over Rude in the corner and does it again. His momentum is short lived as he walks into a powerslam for two. Rude Awakening ends this quick.

Jim Duggan talks about winning the Rumble. He’s always got the board in case he needs it.

Butch Reed vs. Dave Stoudemire

Heenan comes back into the booth and talks about The Main Event but it’s censored. There’s nothing to say here. It runs about two and a half minutes and Reed wins with a top rope shoulder block.

We get clips from the Rumble with Dino Bravo trying for a world bench press record. They only show about two minutes here but the whole thing ran about twenty and ended with Jesse helping.

We also get a clip of the end of the Women’s Tag Title match.

Demolition vs. Rick Hunter/Omar Atlas

Atlas starts and gets beaten down very quickly. Off to Hunter who is taken down even faster. Hunter gets demolished and the Decapitator ends this quick.

Ron Bass thinks all the top talent is hiding from him.

Heenan gets censored again and Vince leans his head in front of Bobby’s mouth so no one can read his lip. That’s a pretty good idea.

Overall Rating: C. The show was just ok but the story was clearly coming strong here and it would only be a matter of time before the whole thing finally got to be talked about. Once that happens, the road to Mania will begin and we’re only about seven weeks away from that show anyway. The wrestling wasn’t great here, but the story was.

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WWF Wrestling Challenge – January 31, 1988: Hogan vs. Andre II Is Coming

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Date: January 31, 1988
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

At the moment this is the last show that I have from this era and this show in particular. There will probably be more but until I get them I obviously can’t review them. We’re past the Rumble now and not a lot has changed. However five days after this, we have the live Main Event which is where for the first time in four years, Hulk Hogan won’t be world champion. Let’s get to it.

We get the usual highlights of the city we’re in and Gorilla opens us up.

Bad News Brown debuts today.

Tiger Chung Lee vs. Junkyard Dog

Dog shoves him to the floor and grabs a hammerlock back inside. The announcers talk about Hogan vs. Andre as the powerslam gets the pin in a quick match.

Craig DeGeorge talks about the card for The Main Event on Friday. We get some clips of the matches that set up Hogan vs. Andre II and Harts vs. Strike Force II. DiBiase and Andre say Hogan is going down and DiBiase will get the title.

Scott Casey vs. Greg Valentine

The fans have the Outshout The Mouth megaphones still. They trade slams and Brutus says that whatever problems Valentine has had before, he’ll have real ones coming up soon. Valentine sends him to the floor where Casey manages to get in a few right hands. Back in Casey misses a top rope splash and the Figure Four ends this quick.

House show ads.

Steve Lombardi vs. Sam Houston

Lombardi isn’t the Brawler yet but is still a jobber. Houston works over the arm and an atomic drop gets two. We hear about the Jumping Bomb Angels winning the Women’s Tag Titles at the Rumble as Lombardi’s offense is stopped very quickly. The armbar takes Steve back to the mat and it’s time for Sam to dance. Belly to belly sets up the bulldog for the pin.

Gene tells us that there actually are other things going on in the company besides Hogan vs. Andre. He brings in Hacksaw who talks about how tough the competition is and how you always have to deal with managers anymore. Hacksaw doesn’t like Harley Race either. They make a “going both ways” joke and it sounds very dirty for some reason.

The fans say who thinks will win some of the bigger matches on Friday.

Hart Foundation vs. Omar Atlas/SD Jones

Bret and Jones start things off. Hart gets sent to the floor so Jimmy yells about a hair pull. Strike Force is looking forward to the match on Friday. Atlas gets caught in the Tree of Woe and Neidhart pounds away. Here’s Bret again with a backbreaker and it’s back to Jim. Brain makes fun of the Bomb Angels as the Hart Attack ends this squash.

Dibiase says that he’s going to collect on the biggest deal of his life on Friday. Andre says he wants to be world champion now and it’s going to be Giantmania.

Randy Savage vs. Terry Gibbs

Gibbs gets in a quick shot and that’s about all he’s got going for him in this match. Savage says he’ll beat Honky on Friday. Slam and elbow get the pin.

With Savage still in the ring, Honky, Jimmy and Peggy Sue come out and say nothing of note before Savage comes to the platform.

Bad News Brown vs. Rex King

Brown jumps Rex during the introduction and the pain begins. Total squash just like any debut, ends in about two minutes with the Ghetto Blaster.

House show ads.

British Bulldogs vs. Dusty Wolfe/Barry Horowitz

Barry pounds away on Davey to start and gets suplexed for his efforts. Off to Dynamite for the snap suplex. Davey powerslams him for no cover as Gorilla talks about the show on Friday. For some reason, they’ve never said what network it’ll be on. More suplexes follow and Davey hits a piledriver. He still won’t cover so Dynamite hits a top rope knee. A middle rope belly to back superplex ends this domination.

Rating: C-. The Bulldogs were near the end of their run here and would be gone by the end of the year. Not a bad match but the jobbers literally didn’t get in a single shot of offense at all. The Bulldogs are still fun to watch though and this was decent enough for a main event I guess.

Butch Reed says that Gene’s questions are none of his business. He has soup bones for fists and is going to take out Muraco like he took out Billy Graham.

Hogan says he wants to break DiBiase’s financial empire and that he’ll prove all the doubts about his first victory this Friday.

Gorilla and Bobby wrap it up.

Overall Rating: C. This made me want to pop in The Main Event which makes this a success. The matches weren’t anything of note but it could have been a lot worse of a show. Either way, Hogan vs. Andre is pushed to the moon and the pushing would work as it holds the record for the highest rated wrestling match ever. Good hype show.

Here’s The Main Event if you’re interested:

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WWF Wrestling Challenge – January 17, 1988: The Rumble Royal? Since When?

WWF Wrestling Challenge
Date: January 17, 1988
Location: Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Back to the early 1988 B shows from the boys up north. We’re still getting close to the Rumble which probably won’t be mentioned more than in passing. Expect some more talk about the upcoming Hogan vs. Andre II match, assuming that’s been advertised already. This is going to be very similar to the Superstars shows that I’ve already done so I’ll know a lot of it before I watch it. Let’s get to it.

We get a message from Bill Boner, the mayor of Nashville, welcoming us to the city.

Gorilla and Bobby are hosts. Gorilla: “Gorilla Monsoon here with this miserable individual.” He’s coming out swinging this week.

They run down the card and Duggan is called a policeman. I haven’t heard that one before.

Jake Roberts vs. Gino Carabello

Gino can barely make it onto the bottom rope to hold his arms up. Gino gets in a single shot before Jake knees him in the ribs to take over. Jake grabs the arm as the fans chant for the DDT. Short clothesline and a slam set up the DDT for the quick squash win.

Gino gets the snake treatment.

Dino Bravo is going to attempt to break a world bench press record at the Rumble and he speaks French about that for a bit.

Jimmy Hart’s Glamor Girls defend the Women’s Tag Titles against the Jumping Bomb Angels. Look those challengers up if you want to see some cool women wrestlers. They get a quick word in Japanese here.

Demolition vs. Omar Atlas/Rex King

Ax and let’s say King start us off and it’s time to pound on the back. Smash comes in for some slams and throws King to the outside. Ax slams him on the concrete and it’s time for more pain. A HARD chop puts King in the ropes and it’s off to Omar. He gets smashed (see? The name makes sense) down as Gorilla and Heenan have some funny exchanges about Heenan’s standing in the company. Fuji says that’s enough and the Decapitator ends Omar.

Rating: D. This wasn’t much other than a long squash, but the tag matches were almost always longer. Demolition was straight up awesome and they dominated for so long that there was no one capable of hanging with them. The match was boring but at least the music was cool.

Gene keeps telling us about the Rumble Royal coming up next Sunday in Ontario. Ron Bass likes his chances and explains the rules one more time.

Bad News Brown is coming.

Jim Duggan vs. Joe Mirto

Harley Race says he’s the real king. Heenan bails to go take care of something else as Duggan pounds away. Mirto is a big guy too so this is even more impressive. Three Point Clothesline ends this.

Van Van Horne vs. Rick Rude

Gorilla thinks Rude vs. Warrior would be a classic. Well I wouldn’t say classic but it was certainly good so chalk up most of one for Monsoon. Rude offers a free shot at the ribs which does nothing of course so he snap suplexes Van Horne after shrugging it off. Rude keeps beating him down but Heenan won’t let him end it. Oh ok now he can so Rude hits a NICE dropkick. I’ve never seen him do that before but it worked perfectly. Rude Awakening ends this.

More Rumble stuff. The Gang and Reed aren’t wanting to go to Canada but they’ll go for the money.

Young Stallions vs. Los Conquistadors

Powers starts with let’s say #1 and armdrags him down. Off to #2 who gets caught as well. The Stallions double team #2 as Heenan is back with facts about Los Conquistadors. They’re from South America and one of them is not named Raoul. One of them, the one we’ll presume isn’t named Raoul, comes off the top with a shot to the back of Powers and more double teaming commences. #1 misses a dive off the top and it’s off to Roma. No one in the crowd seems to care as Powers hits a powerslam on #2 for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not the worst match in the world but the Stallions weren’t interesting at all. They were both your run of the mill muscle guys that were nothing different than any other guys with their builds would have been. There’s just nothing there and that’s why no one cared about them. Even in a less crowded tag team scene they wouldn’t have meant anything.

We get our “live” interview segment with Andre and DiBiase. They talk about the Main Event and Andre says he’ll win the title for DiBiase.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Brian Costello

Warrior immediately clotheslines him over the top to the floor before suplexing him back in. Someone gives Heenan an envelope. Gorilla press and splash get the pin.

Bolsheviks/Butch Reed/One Man Gang vs. Killer Bees/Lanny Poffo/Rick Hunter

This is the closest thing you’ll get to a big match on this show for all intents and purposes. The Bees break up the Soviet anthem and we start with Blair vs. Boris. Off to Brunzell quickly as Heenan shows Gorilla a letter from Tunney reinstating the Islanders. O’Connor Roll gets two on Nikolai, who locks in a bearhug on Brunzell. Reed comes in and runs over Lanny with an elbow and Hunter comes in. Reed runs him over and the Gang hits whatever he called the gordbuster for the pin. Not enough to rate but it was a squash.

Beefcake has his own small bullhorns which he’ll give to the fans to counteract the Megaphone. Then it’ll be him vs. Valentine, which is what he wants.

Gorilla and Bobby wrap it up.

Overall Rating: D+. Nothing of note here but it wasn’t bad. The idea was to talk about the Main Event and it’s pretty clear that no one intended the Rumble to be a major event. I’m more curious about what they’re doing with the name, as it was Rumble Royal a week before the show but the Royal Rumble when it aired. Anyway, pretty weak show, but things would pick up soon.

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WWF New York City House Show – October 17, 1983: Do You Want To See A Man Fly?

WWF House Show
Date: October 17, 1983
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Pat Patterson

Now this is a very interesting one. I saw the show on youtube and absolutely had to do it. The card itself doesn’t mean much as this is during the very tail end of Backlund’s time with the title (he’s defending against Masked Superstar, which is Ax from Demolition) tonight, but there’s another match which we’ll get to in a bit that I’m watching this for. Let’s get to it.

Rene Goulet vs. Tony Garea

Well Garea is awesome at least. Rene gets chased to the apron where he puts on some sort of glove. This is all before the bell apparently. They lock up and Rene climbs up the ropes to escape. Rene gets on Garea’s nerves so Tony punches him into the corner. Goulet bails for a bit and grabs a top wristlock. It’s pretty clear they have a decent amount of time for the match too because this hold goes on for several minutes.

Gorilla and Pat talk about who the Masked Superstar is because there’s no point to talking about this match. Garea comes back with one of his own which gets him nowhere as Goulet pulls the hair. Off to a chinlock which doesn’t last long at all. Goulet stomps on him a bit and this is going nowhere. He rams Tony into the corner a few times and it’s bearhug time.

Goulet finally goes for his Claw but Garea gets all fired up and starts his comeback. He firest off some right hands and a dropkick followed by an atomic drop. Goulet, being French, sells that in an over the top way that Honky Tonk Man would be proud of. That only gets two but a sunset flip gets Tony the pin.

Rating: C-. Not a very good match or anything but it got the crowd going. This is what someone like Garea was great at: throw him out there, let him get beaten up, and have the crowd get fired up for his comeback. Garea is one of those guys where the more I see of him the more I like him, so this wasn’t too bad. I never remember Goulet winning a match.

SD Jones vs. Tiger Chung Lee

Lee has Blassie with him and Jones is coming back off an injury. They fight over arm control which is won by Jones but Lee takes him to the mat and works on the knee. Apparently Blassie, the manager of Lee, didn’t come out to watch. If I were Lee I’d try to get traded for two jobbers to be named later. Jones headbutts him down and it’s time to dance!

Lee chops him down and puts on the nerve hold. Make that a chinlock. Jones spins around to set up a clothesline but Lee runs him over with a shoulder. Back to the chinlock as Gorilla says raw fish wouldn’t turn him on. I don’t think I ever need that image in my head again. Jones comes back with a backdrop and a headbutt for two. Lee runs him over again but gets slammed off the top for two. After Jones no sells a thumb to the eye (how do you do that?) an enziguri pins him.

Rating: D. Really boring match here as it was mainly punching and kicking with a chinlock thrown in. Lee was your usual evil Japanese heel and Jones was popular for some reason that I never got. There were far better generic strong black guys to cheer for but this guy kept sticking around the card. Bad match.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Ivan Putski

Slaughter is EVIL. LONG stall to start as Slaughter doesn’t want to lock up with him. After about two minutes they lock up and Putski uses one of his signature moves: a headlock. It’s not an 80’s thing. It would still be boring by any standards. We’re three and a half minutes into this and we’ve had a headlock as our entire offense. Putski runs him over and puts on a chinlock. This is going to be really dull isn’t it?

Slaughter gets rammed into the post and Putski is in full control. Sarge finally hits an atomic drop but hurts his own knee on it. He manages to come off the middle rope but that leg is bothering him. This has to be legit as there’s no reason for him to sell like this. Slaughter “charges” at him in the corner but hits the post again head first. He manages to hook the Cobra Clutch but Putski makes the rope. Ivan comes back with a bunch of right hands….and one hits the referee for the lame DQ.

Rating: D. A lot of this was because of the knee injury as it would seem they went home early. That being said, the stuff before the injury was really bad with the vast majority of it being a headlock and punches. The early 80s were never really know for workrate and you can see that here very clearly. Putski just wasn’t that good.

Mike Sharpe vs. Tito Santana

This should be good. Before he became an OCD jobber, Sharpe was an OCD midcard heel. Tito grabs a fast hammerlock and Sharpe makes the ropes, which he protests for some reason. They do it again and Santana takes him to the mat which is broken up by the referee. Even Gorilla calls him stupid for that, so you know it was bad. Sharpe adjusts his forearm pad and hits Tito with it, making it cause much more damage.

Santana doesn’t seem to care as he hits a few monkey flips and stomps away in the corner. Sharpe chills on the floor for a bit but walks right back into an armbar. You can tell they’ve got a lot of time to work with here. Sharpe tries about a half dozen counters but Tito will never let go of the hold. He finally gets the rope after about three minutes in the hold. See what I mean by them taking their time?

Sharpe comes back with right hands and right boots to put Tito down. A quick sunset flip gets two for Tito and a straight right hand puts Sharpe down. He misses a charge though and things slow down. Small package gets two but Sharpe gets his foot on the ropes. Off to a chinlock which Tito can’t quite break. After a few minutes in that he guillotines Tito over the top rope. They collide to put both guys down. To the fans’ credit they’re staying in this, despite the match being pretty dull so far. Sharpe misses an elbow and Tito drops a knee for two as the bell rings for the time limit at about 17 minutes which is called 20.

Rating: C-. This was ok but it’s more long than good. There was a lot of laying around and rest holds which get annoying very quickly. Tito kept things fast paced when he was in control though and the fans ate him up so the match wasn’t really terrible or anything. Santana was always good but he needed something better to work with.

Santana chases him off post match.

WWF World Title: Bob Backlund vs. Masked Superstar

Masked Superstar is Ax of Demolition so there’s a chance I’ll call him Ax from time to time. They go to the mat quickly and Backlund is more than fine with that. Backlund takes him back down again with a headlock. Superstar runs him over and tries another headlock on the mat but Bob breaks that up with ease. We hear about Eddie Gilbert being injured by Superstar, which is a show I’ve actually seen.

The champion controls with a headscissors on the mat to frustrate the big guy. Now it’s an armbar as Backlund is picking him apart with whatever body part he cares to work on at the moment. For some reason Superstar keeps trying amateur stuff on Backlund and it fails more and more each time.

Backlund runs over the bigger guy and we get a botched sequence as Superstar tries what looked like a cross body but Backlund didn’t drop at first. It looked like Superstar was trying a jumping tornado DDT but since the regular version didn’t exist yet, he fell on Backlund after spinning around a bit. Really bad looking move but it’s more on Backlund than Superstar, which is rare to see from him.

They slug it out a bit and Backlund goes right back to the arm to keep control. This time it’s a hammerlock so at least he’s mixing things up somewhat. We’re almost ten minutes into this and about six of those have been arm work. Superstar knocks him to the floor to get his first I guess you would say advantage of the match. Backlund finally gets back in and a high knee to the shoulder (supposed to be the face) gets two.

Time for a chinlock as Superstar isn’t much for offense I guess. Backlund fights out of it with punches as this becomes a slugout. Flying headbutt gets two for Superstar. Another attempt at it hits the mat though and Backlund is getting all fired up. He pounds on the arm and tries the chickenwing but Superstar makes the rope very quickly. A clothesline sets up Superstar’s neckbreaker finisher but he won’t cover. Instead he takes Backlund outside and hits the neckbreaker out there which gives him the countout win.

Rating: C. This was basically a Backlund squash for the first ten minutes and then a pretty uninteresting match for the remaining five minutes. Superstar didn’t really do anything until the end with the neckbreaker, which goes to show you how devastating any move can be if it’s sold right. Why he wouldn’t go for the cover is beyond me but whatever.

Post match Backlund comes back in and beats up Superstar, making the neckbreaker seem like a pretty weak move.

Backlund says he knows what he’s facing in Masked Superstar now and he’s ready for him next time. Backlund plays a good psycho.

Bob Bradley vs. Mike Graham

No idea who Bradley is but he’s built well. Graham is the son of Florida promoter Eddie Graham and is okish in the ring. He hooks on an armbar after working Bradley on the mat for a bit. Really uninteresting match here as it’s pure filler between the world title match and the next one which is the feature match of the night. Bradley tries to control him but Graham is too fast for him. A German suplex gets a fast pin for Mike.

Rating: D. Like I said, not an interesting match at all and there’s nothing much else to say about it. Graham never was that good but if you needed a placeholder for a quick match like this one he was ok. I’ve never heard of Bradley but he’s a muscular guy so you can probably guess why he had a job.

Graham says he’s looking for competition to get his Junior Heavyweight Championship back.

Jimmy Snuka says this ends tonight with Muraco. He’s going to reach down inside himself to get whatever it takes because Muraco has brought out the animal in him. Really good promo here.

Buddy Rogers, Snuka’s manager, says this match is important and his man is ready for it.

Muraco says all the talking is done and all that matters now is the match.

Intercontinental Title: Don Muraco vs. Jimmy Snuka

This is in a cage. Sound familiar? You can only win by escape, making this a REAL cage match. A quick slugout is won by Snuka but Muraco pops back up. Snuka chops away as the beating begins. Don tries for the door but Snuka will have none of that. Muraco manages to slingshot him into the cage and Jimmy is busted early. Snuka gets a knee up and climbs the cage, only to come back down and pound away on Muraco some more.

Don manages a slam and goes for the door but Jimmy makes a save, only to take a low blow. Snuka pops up and chops Don’s head open, followed by a middle rope headbutt. He stands Muraco up, and in a semi-famous ending, hits a flying headbutt which knocks Muraco into the door, knocking it open so that the unconscious Muraco can fall out to keep the title.

Rating: D+. The match was intense while it lasted, but the whole thing only runs about seven minutes. There’s nothing of note here at all other than the ending which is pretty creative. I don’t remember a shorter cage match off the top of my head, which is something I think a lot of people forget. I think people think this was a big and epic brawl but it’s really Snuka killing him and then the ending with a run time of 6:46. That’s not much.

Post match Jimmy snaps and throws Muraco back inside. He suplexes Muraco down and goes to the corner. He climbs to the top rope but then goes a step further to the top of the cage, and in the most famous scene in wrestling until Hogan vs. Andre, jumps off the top of the cage with the Superfly Splash, completely crushing Muraco. That still looks great today, and some credit needs to go to Muraco. He was starting to sit up when Jimmy hits him, but after the Splash Muraco is DEAD.

Mick Foley, Sandman, Tommy Dreamer and Bubba Ray Dudley were in attendance that night and all have said this was what made them want to be a wrestler. I can easily see how that would be the case, as there was nothing like this beforehand. Snuka was flying through the air and crushed Muraco, which still looks incredible today. It’s stuff like that which you can only see in wrestling, which is what makes it great.

For some reason on the replays they keep stopping it right before the splash hits.

Albano, Muraco’s manager, says that Muraco is hurt but he’ll be fine and he’ll be back because he’s awesome. Albano rants again a bit because that’s what he does.

Sika vs. Rocky Johnson

The Samoans have the titles and the Soul Patrol wants them. Sika pounds on him to start but misses a charge and Rocky grabs a sunset out of nowhere for the shocking pin. Johnson and Atlas would get the titles in about a month.

Invaders vs. Butcher Vachon/Israel Matia

The Invaders are undefeated and are masked men from Puerto Rico. We’ll say #1 starts with Matia. The Invaders would be faces here I think. Off to #2 and Israel is in trouble. The masked men tag in so fast that I’ve completely lost track of who is who. Off to Butcher (Mad Dog’s brother and Luna’s dad) who gets in a shot at I think #1 to send him to the floor.

#2 has better luck so Butcher tags in Matia while Matia isn’t paying attention. We get a few instances of the tag that the referee doesn’t see which is an old standard way to get the crowd going. The heels cheat some more until the tag brings in #2. A double dropkick puts Matia down and heel miscommunication allows #1 to hip toss #2 onto Israel for the pin.

Rating: D-. What a mess! It seemed like they had no idea who was supposed to be in control here for the most part, which defeats the purpose of what came off like it was supposed to be a squash. The Invaders didn’t last long but #1 is more famous for likely murdering Bruiser Brody.

Andre says he’s got the Samoan tonight. Not much for him to say this week.

Afa vs. Andre the Giant

Afa jumps him before the entrances and the pain begins soon after. Andre kicks him in the head and sits on him for the pin in less than a minute. Total dominance.

Overall Rating: D+. Classic moment aside, this was a pretty uninteresting show. Most of the stuff is watchable but at the same time there’s nothing in the ring that is anything great. I’m sure you’ve seen the cage dive a few thousand times and while it’s cool to see it in context, there’s not much here to see otherwise. Watchable show but it’s nothing worth going out of your way to see. The company needed a shakeup and that would happen in about three months.

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – #5: Running Nearly 4 Hours Before That Was Cool

Wrestlemania 5
Date: April 2, 1989
Location: Trump Plaza, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Attendance: 18,946
Announcers: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura
America The Beautiful: Rockin Robin

This show is more or less the WWF waking up and realizing that not announcing your main event until 20 minutes before it happens isn’t really a good idea. The tagline for this show was very simple: The Mega Powers Explode! Simple concept that’s as old as wrestling itself: Hogan helps Savage become champion, Hogan gets the spotlight even without the belt, Savage’s jealousy gets the best of him and he snaps over a certain incident.

In this case, the incident was on my first birthday in a tag match with Akeem and Big Boss Man against the Mega Powers. Savage got tossed through the ropes and landed on Elizabeth. Hogan carried her back to get help and Savage was left all alone. They argue in the back with Savage cutting the best promo of his life as all of the anger he had stored up inside him erupts and he attacks Hogan to set up this showdown for the gold. Liz says she’s going to try to remain neutral in the main event.

The Women’s Champion sings America the Beautiful and does an ok job at it. Kind of a bland voice though.

Haku vs. Hercules

This match is part of a very unnoticed storyline where Hercules was part of the Heenan Family but was then “sold” to Ted DiBiase. This upset him and Hercules said he was a free man. He went on a small war with Heenan’s stable and I guess you’d call this the climax of that. The feud was nothing at all and it went nowhere as Hercules just wasn’t over at all. This is a power vs. power match that pleasantly surprised me as it has a fair amount of solid wrestling on it and not just all power.

The powder blue tights just don’t do it for a guy with the name of Hercules. Donald Trump is in the front row again which makes sense as he owns the place. Haku is really getting outworked here. Hercules’ offense is a lot more diverse as opposed to chops and bearhugs with a kick thrown in here and there. That’s kind of the storyline of this whole match too and you can see that in the ending.

Haku is the King of Wrestling here and for some reason that isn’t on the line in this match. It was an odd kind of semi-title where you would be proclaimed king and get to wear a crown and have a bunch of muscle jobbers bring you out on a throne but other than that it never really went anywhere. Savage got it and held it for like a year or so and it more or less died after that.

This is about as bland as you can get but it’s surprisingly decent. Hercules worked better as a face because here he has something to fight for in his own pride. Back when he was a heel he had nothing special about him and was just a generic henchman. He’s more interesting and well rounded here though which is what a turn is supposed to accomplish.

Hercules lands a belly to back suplex into a bridge but shoots his shoulder up to avoid the double pin, which was exactly the same thing he lost to the year before. That’s a very subtle touch to his character that a lot of people don’t realize. It shows that he’s capable of learning something new and has adapted a new style over the last year.

Rating: C-. There’s a story here and there’s some decent action, but at the end of it all it’s just not that great. Good and not boring, but not great. This wasn’t much at all from a ring work standpoint but it was surprisingly good. I’m not sure why I like this match but I kind of always have and while it’s certainly an odd choice to open Wrestlemania with, it’s not bad.

In the back we see a team called the Rockers. This Marty Jannetty guy is a freaking STUD. I could see this guy winning something like the IC title, maybe some tag titles or something like that. His partner just does nothing for me though as he’s bland.

Twin Towers vs. The Rockers

Twin Towers are Big Bossman and Akeem, aka the One Man Gang in case you weren’t sure. Rockers had been around for a few months at this point but as they would wind up doing for their whole run they were still trying to find themselves as a team.

This is about as simple of a story as you can get: power vs. speed and it works fairly well here. Akeem seriously may be the greatest gimmick of all time. For those of you that don’t know, One Man Gang and his manager Slick found out that he was of African descent, despite being the palest Caucasian you’ll ever find.

He starts embracing his African roots and doing these weird dances and wearing weird outfits. To see him doing this is just hilarious and something that you should check out for a good laugh and I’d like to give whoever thought it up a ham sandwich.

Cool spot where Bossman has Jannetty up in a bear hug position and Akeem just slams into him. Simple yet effective. Jannetty gets his head handed to him the majority of the match. Slick screaming about how a black referee would count faster and wouldn’t cheat is just such a great touch when his wrestlers are whiter than snow.

Becca shouldn’t watch this match as Akeem just about kills Shawn with one of the best clotheslines I’ve ever seen. Bossman kills him even worse with a spinning powerbomb and then a splash by Akeem and Shawn is finally given a break as the pin goes down.

Rating: C. This was a solid performance by the Rockers but they really didn’t stand much of a chance. Some good spots make this quite passable though. What’s with the back to back generic matches to start off the biggest show of the year though? Is this really the best they could find?

Ted DiBiase is rich and likes to talk about it. He’s also got a new belt that he likes showing off.

Ted DiBiase vs. Brutus Beefcake

Hearing DiBiase having different homes for each season is just a perfect touch to the gimmick that makes him so much more fun to hate. Still say he’s the best heel of all time. Brutus finally has his awesome music here. Jesse describes Brutus’ pants perfectly: it looks like a grenade went off in his pockets. Ted talks to Trump before we start.

What exactly did Brutus expect to do with those huge hedge clippers? This is a balance of the sleepers. According to Gorilla this is one of the reasons the fans are here for. Something tells me that’s not the case. DiBiase cheats almost immediately as the heel he is. What a fall he’s taken in a year. From the main event to this. Wow.

We get a pretty nice back and forth sequence to start as both guys are moving pretty well out there. Jesse drops some names as they slug it out. It’s turned into a standard kick and punch match which isn’t interesting or anything but it fills in time pretty well I suppose.

DiBiase gets a nice shot off the middle rope but doesn’t cover or anything. Why do that anyway? No one gets pins off moves like those anyway. Brutus gets a small package for two. Double clothesline and Ted gets up first. There’s the Million Dollar Dream but Beefcake gets the rope. More kicking and punching sets up Beefcake’s sleeper. Virgil gets Beefcake on the floor and DiBiase follows, leading to a double countout. Gorilla kind of scoffs at the ending.

Rating: D+. They were just kind of there. Pretty boring too. Nothing interesting here at all. I’ve always loved the falling punch DiBiase used. Just something sweet about it. This is power versus technician but it just doesn’t come off that way. Beefcake was supposed to be a power guy I think but he wasn’t that good at it. It’s also not a power move to use a sleeper. Yeah this match was pretty weak.

There used to be a thing called the Bagels and Biceps Brunch. What the point of this was, I’m not sure but it apparently was a tradition. The Bushwackers, one of which licked my face at a house show, are about to face the Rougeaus.

Bushwackers vs. The Fabulous Rougeau Brothers

The Rougeau’s music of We’re All American Boys is nothing short of awesome. Just an awesome song and one of Jimmy Hart’s great touches. The Bushwackers are just out there even by today’s standards. How these guys lasted nearly 6 years in a completely different gimmick than they started with is beyond me.

The Battering Ram is one of the dumbest yet most awesome moves I’ve ever seen. Now this is a match that I remember only one thing about. During a scoop slam, Luke of the Bushwackers clearly rubs Ray Rougeau crotch. It’s not on accident either. He puts his hand there and rubs up and down. Just a disturbing sight.

Other than that this is nothing but a comedy match. The 80s were so awesome in the area of tag wrestling that they even managed to have jobber tag teams on a regular basis. There’s nothing going on here with the Bushwackers running around for a minute, the Rougeaus controlling for two minutes and the finish. To end this in a hurry, Bushwackers win with their rib breaker move.

Rating: D-. The crotch rub never fails to surprise me. Just not something I want to think about. The match completely sucked though and just never went anywhere at all. What is with all these fillers? DiBiase vs. Beefcake is by far the biggest matchup so far and even it is nothing special and could have been on any house show that year. Weak show so far and a weak match here.

Sean Mooney, one of my all time favorite broadcasters gets licked by a Bushwacker while talking to some fans in a pointless segment.

Mr. Perfect vs. The Blue Blazer

Yes that’s Owen Hart under the mask. This is another match that is more or less just there for the sake of being there but it should be pretty good. Perfect is still undefeated here. Jesse thinks this is going to be tremendous. Hennig gets a nice hiptoss to start.

He slaps the Blazer and doesn’t get drilled as a result for some reason. Ah there’s the slap and Owen speeds things up a bit. And then we slow them right back down. Baseball slide hits Perfect. Owen was WAY ahead of his time here as he could move like no one else could and was busting out Japanese and European stuff which was unheard of in America at this time.

Blazer is dominating here as Perfect has no idea what to do with him. BIG top rope splash eats knees though. That looked awesome as he got way up in the air and nailed the knees perfectly. Jesse has a surprise for Gorilla.

Powerslam by Blazer gets two and a belly to belly gets two as well. Jesse thinks Perfect has Mania jitters. Crucifix gets two for Blazer. And then a big shot gets Perfect the advantage. Perfectplex gets the easy pin.

Rating: B-. Pretty solid little match here with both guys moving very well. It was speed/flying vs. technical style out there and it worked very well. It helps having two guys that can work a variety of styles. Perfect hit two moves the whole match which hurts this though. Still solid stuff and Owen looked awesome in this.

Yet again, Jesse is introduced to the crowd as a “major Hollywood star” (he had done some supporting roles in some fairly big movies like Predator). There was apparently a 5K run with Mr. Fuji, in tuxedo and bowler hat, running in a decent time. He’s in the handicap tag title match later on if you’re wondering what the heck this is for. He finishes without even breathing hard and Lord Alfred Hayes suspects shenanigans.

Now for something just completely out of place, Run DMC performs the Wrestlemania Rap. This thing goes on and on and on.

Tag Titles: Mr. Fuji and Powers of Pain vs. Demolition

Storyline on this: Demolition was by far and away the most dominant tag team the late 80s had ever seen. They held the titles for about a year and a half which is still the longest amount of time ever. They were brought in as heels around Wrestlemania 3 and won the belts at Wrestlemania 4. Sometime between 3 and 4, they got Mr. Fuji as a manager.

Over the course of the summer, the fans realized how truly awesome Demolition was and they began to cheer them. Around the same time, the Powers of Pain, comprised of the Warlord and the Barbarian debuted as faces. The problem was more people liked Demolition than the PoP. So what was the solution you ask? The answer was the incredibly difficult and even rarer double turn.

At the 1988 Survivor Series, the teams had been feuding over the tag belts and were captains of their respective Survivor Series teams. Late in the match, Fuji pulled the top rope down and Smash fell over the ropes and landed on the floor. Ax got in Fuji’s face about it and Fuji answered with I’m The Boss! Demolition beat up Fuji and were counted out. The Powers of Pain helped him up and soon thereafter he was their manager.

So all of that leads us here to the showdown with Fuji and his team in a 3-2 match with Demolition for the tag titles. Fuji does what Heenan did last year with a shot here and a shot there, but at least with Fuji he had a very successful tagging career, including a reign that at the time was the longest in the history of the title. This match is what you would expect from it.

The formula is exactly what you would expect in a match like this. Demolition beats down the Powers, they beat them back, Fuji comes in and beats them up a bit, which is to say he kicks them twice, and then he runs away. This isn’t anything we haven’t seen a thousand times before and it’s not particularly entertaining. Naturally it gets about 9 minutes.

Demolition holds their own but eventually gets beaten up by all three, until Fuji makes a mistake. He misses an elbow from the top rope which is impressive in its own right, then eventually throws salt that was his trademark but misses. He’s then hit with the Demolition Decapitation, which might be the worst double team move of all time, and pinned.

Rating: C-. I liked this match but then again I like Demolition. Fuji actually knew how to wrestle and was only in his early 50s at the time so he still could go in the ring to an extent. Demolition is a simple team at heart: beat the tar out of their opponents. That’s hard to mess up and they did it as well as any team ever did. The lack of drama hurts it a good deal though and it shows.

Tony Schiavone tries to talk to Macho Man but gets thrown out.

Ronny Garvin vs. Dino Bravo

Umm, ok? What the point to this match is I have no idea, but after the introductions, Jimmy Snuka is introduced to the crowd for some reason. Literally, they announce Bravo and Garvin, and then the Fink says there is a special guest tonight. Snuka comes out in full apparel and to his music and gets in the ring and poses. He has absolutely nothing to do with this match and isn’t seen again all night.

Anyway onto the match. I have never liked Ronny Garvin. The man just absolutely bores me to tears in the ring. How he became the NWA Champion and even defended it at Starrcade 87 is beyond me. Bravo was ok in the ring but just never really did it for me either. As I say that, Garvin puts on a sleeper which is perfect because I’m falling asleep watching this.

In a strange ending (Thank God) Garvin is up in the corner punching Bravo but gets caught with an atomic drop and is side suplexed to pin him. Garvin gets up and hits Bravo and then uses what has to be the stupidest finisher of all time on Bravo’s manager, the Garvin Stomp. Randy Orton I believe has used this recently. He starts at the arm and goes around the body stomping the opponent. Just looks bad.

Rating: F. I was bored to tears and don’t like either one. This is a biased rating and I could care less. This is a Ronnie Garvin match and therefore it sucks.

Strike Force vs. The Brainbusters

Strike Force (a breath of fresh air after that awful match that just aired) is teaming together for the first time in a long time. Martel was injured by Demolition and was gone for almost a year. In the time off, Santana wrestled in singles matches. Upon Martel’s return, he asked Tito to reform Strike Force which he eventually did. This is their first match back against Arn Anderson and Tully Blanchard. After this match, the Busters would go on to feud with Demolition over the tag belts.

It sounds wrong to hear Gorilla talking about a Horsemen match and calling them a couple of really tough dudes. Jesse and Gorilla bickering is always funny. it says a lot when Martel is by far the worst technician in a match. Big brawl to start and surprisingly Strike Force wins it.

Martel gets a very nice counter from a body scissors into the Boston Crab. That was impressive. Everything breaks down and Strike Force gets a pair of Figure Fours which has to be at least a mini-rib on the Horsemen.

And now we get the meat of the match as Tito accidentally drills Martel with his flying forearm and down he goes onto the floor. After about a minute Martel gets back up but he’s all shaken up. The Busters work the referee and the tag rules like the masters that they are.

Santana keeps trying to come back and finally does by slamming Arn off the top. Yeah that has to be a rib. Tito finally gets away and goes for the tag but Martel won’t tag and then leaves, heading to the dressing room.

Arn yells at Santana WHERE’S YOUR PARTNER to just be a jerk. The ramp/aisle is really long here so it takes Martel like two minutes to get back. Tito fights back as well as he can but he’s outnumbered and after a few minutes the spike piledriver ends it.

Rating: B-. Half tag and half handicap so it’s unique if nothing else. I always liked both teams and I like what I see here. The post match promo is solid too so it gets a good grade. Very interesting here as this obviously causes the split between the two. They would feud on and off for nearly two years after this with neither one really winning the feud. What’s forgotten in this is the Brainbusters. They are their usually great selves and but on a solid match.

Martel blames Tito and says it was Tito’s idea to reform the team and all that jazz. This is his heel turn if you didn’t get that. He wouldn’t be a face again for like 8 years until he was in WCW.

Piper’s Pit

This gets one of the biggest pops of the nights. One of the funniest lines I’ve heard in a long time from the Fink: I am pleased to introduce to you a man who needs no introduction. We get a really long intro for Piper and out comes the man that creeped me out more than anyone else as a kid: Brother Love.

Seriously, the guy had a red face. That’s just incredibly scary looking to a two year old. Throw in his voice and it’s just scary. His character was based on high energy Christian televangelists such as Jimmy Swaggert. You all might know him better as Bruce Pritchard who was a creative team member until a few months ago.

Love then says his guest on the Brother Love show is Rodney Piper. He then imitates Piper in something that is either dead on or awful and I can’t tell which. He asks questions as Love and takes his glasses off and changes chairs to be Piper. Then out comes the guest, Morton Downey Jr.

This show aired nearly 20 years ago and until I looked him up just seconds ago, I had no freaking clue who this guy was and I’ve seen this PPV at least 30 times. Turns out he was a talk show host that was the inspiration for Springer, Maury etc. His show was viewed as amazingly Right Wing based and he would often berate anyone that disagreed with him. He was later replaced by Rush Limbaugh.

Anyway, Downey is smoking a cigarette which Gorilla refers to as weed. This made my jaw drop. Gorilla said he was puffing on weed. Gorilla Monsoon isn’t supposed to talk about weed blast it! Downey trash talks with Brother Love until they’re interrupted by the Fink who says Piper really is here. Out comes Piper for his first WWF appearance in 2 years.

Piper talks down to Love because of the kilt that Love is wearing. He asks him questions but keeps pulling the mic away saying he doesn’t want to know that badly. I’d forgotten how funny Piper was in his prime. He turns his attention to Downey who is still smoking and keeps blowing smoke into Piper’s face which Piper doesn’t approve of. Downey keeps using the standard insults.

My favorite line: Piper mentions that Downey used to have warts all over his face. Piper: What did you with the warts? Downey: I gave them to a homeless warthog. Piper: (without missing a beat) I didn’t know your girlfriend was homeless. Downey calls Piper is a transvestite before blowing more smoke in his face.

Piper asks for a cig for himself. Downey turns to light it and for no reason at all, Piper has a fire extinguisher under his chair. In probably his second most famous bit after the coconut, Piper sprays him down and leaves.

About as appropriately as possible, Downey would die of lung cancer in 2001.

BREAKING NEWS-Hulk Hogan is making a movie! It’s called No Holds Barred. That movie truly was nine kinds of awesome.

Sean Mooney is talking to Donald Trump. Apparently WM 4 and 5 have been successes.

Jesse is TICKED OFF. Hogan is invading his territory because after he loses to Macho he needs a job. Jesse says he can drive his limo and storms off. Gorilla plugs the movie again and recaps the show so far. We get a video recapping the Mega Powers rise to glory and their split.

Hogan says he can’t believe how this all came about in just a year. He goes into another of his insane promos about everyone being swallowed up by the Earth when the Trump Towers fall apart. Makes little if any sense. Then he talks about winning the title.

Andre the Giant vs. Jake Roberts

Big John Studd is the referee here for no apparent reason. He comes out to what would become Jim Duggan’s music oddly enough. No real reason is given as to why he’s the referee here. Andre is back with Heenan. The point of this match is Andre is terrified of snakes.

This resulted in a scene on television where Andre had a “heart attack” when Jake put the snake on him, yet he’s wrestling again just a few months later. Remarkable. Around this time, Jake was insanely popular, arguably the third biggest face in the company after only Hogan and Warrior.

Somehow before the match starts one of the turnbuckle pads is off and Roberts gets slammed into it. Gorilla says that Jake is like David against Goliath and Jesse says David had to use a foreign object to beat him which makes me want to write the Bible from a wrestling perspective one day. In a funny bit Andre chokes Jake in the corner and Studd goes to count Andre and you literally can’t see Jake other than his feet. Jake stood 6’5.

It’s your standard Andree match from this era. He just could not move to save his life at this point and was a complete shell of his former self. They do the tied up in the ropes spot and Andre is reeling. More pain and punishment goes in until Heenan gets the arm loose and here comes your unfriendly and not likely from your neighborhood Giant.

Something happens in this match that I’ve never been sure of. Andre is throwing shoulders to Jake’s ribs in the corner and falls backwards and down to one knee. He doesn’t hit his head on anything that I can see. Always thought that was just odd. Andre and Studd finally fight while DiBiase of all people runs out and steals the bag with the snake in it. Roberts catches him and throws the snake in the ring to get rid of Andre. Jake wins via DQ.

Rating: D. This is just a strange combination. Andre just didn’t mesh well with most because he was too freaking big. Roberts tried his best but it didn’t go that well. Studd served no real purpose here at all either. They tried but it didn’t work that well.

Sherri will get the title back apparently and doesn’t like Liz at all.

Rhythm and Blues vs. The Hart Foundation

The newly face Harts face off with their old manager’s new team of Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine. To me this was just before Bret’s prime. He’s so smooth in the ring that I’m gaining a new respect for him. The announcers refer to Pat Patterson as a relic. That’s just amusing.

This is the most basic of basic tag matches I can remember in a long time. I mean NOTHING happens here. The faces start in control, the heels take over and dominate for a bit, then we get a hot tag and the finish begins.

Honky hits the Shake Rattle and Roll on Bret but he tags in Hammer for the figure four which clearly is a mistake. Back and forth and Jimmy tosses in the Megaphone which is intercepted. After a solid shot to Honky’s shoulder Neidhart pins him.

Rating: D+. Bret makes this one pretty good for a glorified squash. This went nowhere at all and it’s MORE FILLER. We’ve had ONE match break ten minutes tonight: the Beefcake match got up to 10:01. That’s saying a lot. Just another match that went absolutely nowhere at all.

We get a recap of the Warrior/Rude feud. It involves a posedown and a lot of talking.

Intercontinental Title: Rick Rude vs. Ultimate Warrior

The idea of this is the two competed for who had the best body. They had a pose off at the Royal Rumble and Rude attacked the Warrior with a steel exercise bar. Not much of a story but this was the second biggest match on the card.

For some reason that God alone knows, these two had freaks chemistry together. It’s rare to ever see a bad match between them. I have no idea why this is the case but that’s how it always was with them. To have one of the worst workers ever and another who’s character was great but in the ring wasn’t great but wasn’t bad either be able to put on such solid matches really is a strange thing.

Warrior beats the heck out of Rude early on. This is a good beating and Rude sells it like there’s no tomorrow. Warrior works the back with some very powerful whip ins and a BIG bearhug. It looks like it’s going to be a quick little match but a piledriver slows Warrior down and it’s Rude in control.

Rude’s back is injured but he stays in the game as long as he can. Rude beats on him for nearly four or five minutes as he becomes one of the only people to actually beat down the Warrior and have success at it.

And so much for that as Warrior makes his comeback but as he’s trying to suplex Rude back in Heenan hooks his leg and holds it for the pin and the huge upset. Heenan gets beaten up by Warrior afterwards and because Warrior was so bad in the ring he legitimately hurt Bobby in this.

Rating: B. While not the best workers and a weak story, they again manage to put on a good match. I didn’t give it the description it deserves but that’s really all there was to it. Very well done though. The freaky chemistry these two had continue and I have never gotten it at all.

Jim Duggan vs. Bad News Brown

This is the epitome of a filler. Nothing of note happens here at all as it’s a brawl that the announcers don’t care about at all. It’s about 3 minutes long and ends in a chair vs. 2×4 duel that Duggan wins.

Rating: F. No one cared and they knew it.

Red Rooster vs. Bobby Heenan

Backstory: Rooster, who has what to me is the worst gimmick of all time, (he literally acted like a rooster, complete with going cock-a-doodle-doo and strutting like one. He passed up the Mr. Perfect gimmick and got this instead) used to work for Heenan but Heenan said he wasn’t that good. This is the Rooster trying to get revenge.

Heenan comes out with the Brooklyn Brawler. This match literally doesn’t last a minute. Heenan jumps the Rooster and whips him into the corner. Rooster gets out of the way and Heenan hits the post and is covered for the pin. Brawler comes in and beats up Rooster who fights back and wins. Wow.

Rating: N/A. This was a total waste of time. But hey, the Brooklyn Brawler got PPV time!

We recap the WWF Title match. Hogan helped Savage win it a year ago and then more or less stole the spotlight for the next year. Liz got involved and Savage thought she was sleeping with Hogan. He went off on him on February 3 (I was turning 1) and turned heel, setting this up.

Hogan says Savage went crazy. That’s just amusing. This is the promo where Hogan absolutely loses his mind and goes on a rant about the building being swallowed up by the Earth or something and Donald Trump being worried about falling into the ocean.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

They were trying to make this the second coming of Hogan/Andre but there was far less mystery of who was going to win. Liz is at ringside as an independent observer and she actually does just that: nothing. This match has the big match feel to it but looking back it was obvious which way it was going. Savage comes out first if that tells you anything.

Liz gets her own entrance and Jesse says she’ll leave with whoever wins. Gorilla says that sounds smart to him. To say this match is huge is a dramatic understatement. Jesse: this is what the term main event is used for. This is the main event. He’s absolutely right too as this drew INSANE money as they had built up the mega match between these two forever.

Hogan shoves Savage with ease and there he goes. The announcers argue about managers which is kind of funny. Savage keeps running in fear from Hogan and it’s basic stuff so far. He throws Liz in front of a Hogan punch but Hulk stops in time.

There’s Hogan’s wrestling quota for the year as he uses a four move combination to break down Savage and get a front facelock. Savage overpowers him in a surprise by backdropping him. Savage takes over a bit by getting a top rope double axe in. The champion works the arm for some reason. LONG sequence with the arm and then a headlock as we fill in time.

Hogan gets an atomic drop to counter but misses an elbow drop. Hogan’s eye was cut earlier on and it gets rammed into the buckle to open it up even worse. Savage slaps him and here comes Hulk. He slams Savage to the floor and Liz helps him up. They fight on the floor and Hogan gets rammed into the post.

Now Liz helps Hogan up. I guess she wants a double team later on. Hebner, the cock blocker that he is, throws Liz out. Savage hits the double axe off the top to send Hogan’s throat into the railing. Steamboat was out for three months because of that. It doesn’t even get two on Hogan. Savage slams him and there’s the big elbow. Hogan shoves him off, three punches, big boot, big leg, you know the drill I think. Lots of posing ends the show.

Rating: C+. Well it’s not bad, but the problem here is that it is completely underwhelming. This was supposed to be the biggest match ever and it’s just pretty standard fort he most part. Hogan wins the title again and shrugs off Savage’s best move. Not a fan of that at all but it’s the 80s so what are you going to do?

Overall Rating: D+. This is the first of the second era of Wrestlemanias that follows the now traditional Wrestlemania formula. There’s some ok stuff on here and it probably has the oddestok card yet. Pretty much every big star is here, the titles have good matches, the midcard matches are bad, and you have the WM main event.

This show also has the first instance of setting the stage for the future. 1989 was the first year of the big four PPVs so there were other feuds that would be needing to be closed at big shows. Feuds like Hogan and Perfect which sparked Hogan and Warrior, Roberts against DiBiase, and the continuation of Warrior and Rude which led to Warrior against the Heenan Family all spawned from this.

You could arguably call this the first standard Wrestlemania, and I would just barely give it that name over WM 3. Overall this is pretty weak show and the problem with it is mainly the match lengths. TWO matches broke ten minutes and one went past 10:01. I used to really like this one but it doesn’t hold up at all. Pretty bad show but it’s watchable I suppose. That’s about it.

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Superstars of Wrestling – January 23, 1988: Hogan vs. Andre II Is Coming

Superstars of Wrestling
Date: January 23, 1988
Location: Von Braun Civic Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura, Bruno Sammartino

Smackdown is still loading and probably will be for awhile so let’s take a look at the show the day before the inaugural Royal Rumble. I’d be shocked if that show is actually discussed though, as this show was likely taped weeks in advance. Also we’re getting closer and closer to the Hogan title loss which should be interesting. Let’s get to it.

Usual intro.

Randy Savage vs. Barry Horowitz

Vince goes into his usual I LOVE LIZ stuff. Given his well known female exploits, thank goodness this is when Vince was just a commentator. Savage hits the ax from the top both inside the ring and out to the floor. Peggy Sue (Sherri as Honky’s girl) says stay away from her man. Knee drop gets two. The big elbow ends this.

Update on Matilda who is back. The Islanders are reinstated but everyone hates them now. We get some clips of the announcement that Matilda is back. The Islanders and Heenan aren’t worried about Matilda’s condition. The Bulldogs say Matilda is in bad shape and won’t eat, meaning she’s lost a lot of weight.

Ricky Hunter/W.D. Wellington vs. Butch Reed/One Man Gang

Vince talks about an address that you can send get well cards to Matilda at. Vince: “I’m sure the British Bulldogs read the cards to Matilda.” Jesse: “I’d bet she has to read them to the Bulldogs.” Muraco wants the Gang and Reed. Reed runs over Hunter to start and it’s off to Gang for some pounding. An elbow nearly kills Hunter so it’s off to Wellington. Back to Reed who uses Nikolai’s gorilla press into a backbreaker. Gang hits a gordbuster for the pin. Total domination.

We talk about a New Haven show with a cage match. It’ll be a six man tag in there. We hear about the rest of the card and Jimmy Hart comes in to talk about the six man tag (Savage/Strike Force vs. Honky/Harts).

Joe Mirto/Iron Mike Sharpe vs. Ken Patrea/Billy Jack Haynes

Haynes and Sharpe start us off and Sharpe gets in some offense. Off to Patera vs. Mirto and we hear from Demolition, who is having a small feud with Haynes and Patera. Jesse talks about Hogan vs. Andre II on February 5. Kind of strange that we hear about that but not the Rumble. A quick full nelson to Mirto gets the submission for Haynes.

More house show stuff, this time with Bravo and Frenchy Martin saying they’re ready for Hillbilly Jim. Rude comes in and says he’s beat Koko B. Ware.

Hart Foundation/Danny Davis vs. Rex King/Van Van Horne/Sam Houston

Houston and Davis start us off and Davis is in trouble early. Off to Horne and then King, who is taken down by Davis. What does it mean when Danny Davis is beating you up? Anvil comes in and the power moves begin. Bret does a few things and it’s back to Davis. Houston makes a small comeback but Bret trips him up. The Hart Attack kills Houston and Davis gets the easy pin. This was nothing, although Jesse called referee Joey Marella she for some reason.

We get a clip of Greg Valentine attacking Koko after beating him until Beefcake made the save. Jimmy got a haircut with the big hedge clippers.

Andre and DiBiase are in the arena to talk about February 5. DiBiase says he warned everyone that he would find a way to buy the world title and Andre is that way. Andre says he’ll break Hogan apart and choke him down. DiBiase says the fans won’t mean anything to Hulk then. Maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh.

Jim Duggan vs. Steve Lombardi

Duggan pounds on him and Lombardi’s shots to the head do nothing. Duggan has a hard head and is stupid you see. A kneedrop and slam set up the three point clothesline for the pin.

Bad News Brown says he’s the only news.

Harley Race/Hercules/Rick Rude vs. Jerry Allen/Lanny Poffo/Scott Casey

Poffo does a quick poem about the Slammys. Casey and Herc start but it’s quickly off to Rude. Ok make that Race. Everyone on the jobber team gets beaten up by all of the Heenan team. Hercules racks Allen for the tap out. Total squash.

Savage and Strike Force say they’re ready for the cage match.

Vince previews next week’s show to end this.

Overall Rating: D+. Pretty boring show this week but again they’re like 40 minutes long so they’re easy to do. We’re on the verge of hitting it huge with these angles too so it’s worth sitting through this part to get to the big stuff. Ton of squashes here as you would expect, but the talk of Hogan vs. Andre makes me drool.

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Wrestlemania #4: Book The Tournament Finals

As you know, Wrestlemania 4 had a tournament format. If you didn’t know that, go read about it below. Anyway short question today: how would you have booked it? The only rules: you have to keep the same people in the tournament and Hogan vs. Savage is the main event of Wrestlemania 5 no matter what.  I’m not much of a booker, but here’s what I would have done:I like the original plan which had DiBiase beating an exhausted Hogan in the finals, likely through cheating.    Have Andre knocks Hogan out, Savage runs out for the save but Hogan is out cold in the Million Dollar Dream, and DiBiase stands tall to end the show.  I know it’s a big stretch for the 80s, but how hot would the house shows have been for Hogan vs. DiBiase?  The idea here is that it gives DiBiase the summer to chase Hogan, you have Savage win the title at the first Summerslam and then the Mega Powers Explode as was carved into stone for Mania 5.