Here we go again. In case you haven’t had enough big shows in the last month, it’s time for Backlash 2018, which isn’t exactly a show that I’m fired up to see. A lot of the matches have been done either at WrestleMania 34 or at the Greatest Royal Rumble, or even both in one case. The show doesn’t have any sizzle to it and the wrestlers seemed spent this week on TV. Hopefully things can pick up on the bigger stage though. Let’s get to it.
Kickoff Show: Bayley vs. Ruby Riott
Does anyone else think this third women’s match was added as an apology for the Greatest Royal Rumble issues? I’m not saying that’s good or bad but it feels like a very real possibility. This is a match designed to help advance another story in the form of Bayley vs. Sasha Banks and that’s perfectly acceptable. Banks vs. Bayley should be outstanding and they’ve both been dealing with Riott on the way there.
I’ll take Bayley here as she overcomes the odds of the Riott Squad (and potentially Banks) to set up the big match down the line. That’s going to be the case with another match later on the card and it’s not doing much to make me think that this is more than a pit stop on the way to something more important. This should be a fine match, but nothing that we wouldn’t see on Raw. In other words: it’s perfect for what it’s doing.
Raw Women’s Title: Nia Jax(c) vs. Alexa Bliss
Assuming Bliss is capable of having the match after her recent cosmetic surgery, I’m not sure what to do here. I know the most logical move is to just have Jax squash Bliss once and for all to keep the title, but is that really necessary? Jax got her big win at WrestleMania and honestly, she’s not the most thrilling champion in the world. You get the idea of the character with one look at her and she doesn’t need to be champion to make that work. Bliss is the more versatile star and could be a top star for a long time to come.
I think I’ve talked myself into it so I’ll go with Bliss regaining the title here. Bliss is the more interesting option as champion and there’s no reason to keep the title on Jax. She got the big title win so just move us on and get back to Bliss having really good matches against the rest of the division. Jax can get the title back to recharge her career later, but the WrestleMania win is all she’s going to need for a long time.
Daniel Bryan vs. Big Cass
I’m surprised we haven’t found out that Cass is working for Miz yet. That’s what makes the most sense in the whole thing as Miz can easily say that Cass is an upgrade over the Miztourage (which he is) and that he’s sent Cass to deal with Bryan wanting revenge. At the end of the day, all that matters is getting to Bryan vs. Miz, which should be one of the most entertaining stories in a long time.
Of course I’ll go with Bryan though, as there’s no reason to have him lose for a LONG time. Let him go out there and make Cass look better than he has in his entire career and see what he can get out of the big guy. It makes perfect sense and as mentioned, it can keep things moving towards the important matches down the line. Just don’t let Cass kick Bryan in the head too hard. Please?
SmackDown Women’s Title: Carmella(c) vs. Charlotte
Please let me be right on this one. I really don’t want to see Carmella wasting our time as being the champion in over her head who still manages to escape the more talented challengers over and over. She’s the latest example of someone winning the title by way of the mythical briefcase and that’s almost never a good idea to bring someone up to the next level. I know Charlotte has held the title for a long time but I’d take that over Carmella as champion.
Unfortunately, I don’t see that happening. As much better as Charlotte would be as champion, WWE isn’t likely to be wasting the Money in the Bank cash-in so close to the next Money in the Bank show. Odds are the Iconics cost Charlotte the match here to continue that feud and we move on the someone like Naomi challenging for the title. Hopefully we get the title back on Becky Lynch sooner rather than later, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it takes some time to get the thing off of Carmella.
Braun Strowman/Bobby Lashley vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens
Pick your favorite reason why this one does nothing for me. Is it because one of the teams has to lose? Maybe because we just saw this match a few weeks back on Raw? Or do you prefer that we could have had Lashley and Strowman win the titles at WrestleMania and skipped the whole Nicholas thing? Either way, I’m not exactly thrilled with this one as every day Strowman isn’t the World Champion or at least chasing the title is another wasted day.
I’ll go with the monsters winning, but there’s almost a guaranteed split to set up a feud coming up soon. I can’t imagine they’ll win the titles (Lashley is no Nicholas) but I’d rather go with the feud than wasting Strowman in a tag team for months on end. Zayn and Owens would be better options to go after the titles (on their way to the World Title scene that is, whenever Lesnar finally loses the stupid thing) down the line, though for now I’ll have to live with them losing.
United States Title: Jeff Hardy(c) vs. Randy Orton
Well, it worked ten years ago right? Hardy’s singles run is starting to take shape and if it’s anywhere near as successful as it was back in the day, the WWE is sitting on at least a silver mine. He’s still crazy popular and there’s money to be made in pushing him like this (assuming he doesn’t screw the whole thing up again of course). Orton is still flailing around like he’s been doing for years now and while that’s not good, he’s a good choice for this match.
As you might have guessed, I’ll take Hardy to retain here as he could use another big win under his red, white and blue belt. A nice run as US Champion could go a long way in making Hardy seem like a big deal again and if this leads to him getting back to the main event on his own, it could be a lot of fun for WWE and the Hardy fans. Orton losing isn’t going to do a bit of harm to him and it’s the right call here. Hardy retains, as he should.
Roman Reigns vs. Samoa Joe
Let’s get this one over with. I’m sure you know where this is going and that’s not the best thing in the world. Reigns recently lost in Saudi Arabia in another match that makes him look like the least successful undisputed top stars of all time. Now that he’s lost to Brock Lesnar (again, though this time due to being screwy rather than just getting pinned), it’s time to get him back on track and who cares what that costs to get him there.
So yeah, I’ll be going with Reigns over Joe here because that’s what WWE thinks will make me get more interested in the Raw main event scene. Samoa Joe could be ready to become one of the top stars on SmackDown Live but for some reason we’re likely getting another Reigns win to no reaction because that’s what matters in WWE, no matter what happens. The match will likely be very good as it usually is between these two, but Reigns wins because that’s what he does.
Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins(c) vs. The Miz
Egads can we get done with these interpromotional matches already? Either wait for after Backlash to set up the roster switches or don’t announce stuff for the pay per view until after the switches have been made. Things like this takes away from the drama (unless they have some big surprise switch in mind) as they’re not likely going to send the title back to SmackDown, or send Miz back to Raw, in such short order. Then again either of those things would make my head hurt more than anything else so maybe I should bet on them.
I’ll go with the hopefully sane choice though and pick Rollins to retain. WWE seems interested in pushing the heck out of him and it wouldn’t make a bit of sense to take the title off of him yet. Let Miz get ready for his Bryan feud and go from there while Rollins finds someone new to feud against. Rollins needs the title more at this point, though there’s no question that Bryan vs. Miz for the title is very appealing. But yet, Rollins retains.
SmackDown World Title: AJ Styles(c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura
This is No DQ and there’s not much of a reason to keep the title on Styles here. In theory this could be used to switch Styles over to a #1 contenders feud with Samoa Joe, which could set up a heck of a match for the title, though heel vs. heel would need to be addressed. They’ve built Nakamura up for months now though and having him lose in another title match wouldn’t make sense.
Again I’ll go with a decision that might come back to haunt me and pick Nakamura to walk out with the title. He’s been primed up to become champion for over a month now and if he loses again, I’m really not sure what else they can do to keep him back near the top. Go with the smart move here as Nakamura Kinshasas Styles low to win the title.
Overall Thoughts
I’m just burned out on the big shows right now. WrestleMania 34 was just a month ago and now we’re on a third major show since then (including a show whose presentation was on par with WrestleMania). There comes a point where it’s too much in such a short span and we passed that last Friday. It’s hard to make myself care about a bunch of people and matches that I saw on a bigger stage recently but that’s the WWE calendar for you.
I’m not sure how this show is going to fill in the extra hour, as eight pay per view matches don’t seem like enough for the time. Either they’ve got something planned or the four hours isn’t accurate. One way or another, it’s going to be a long night that hopefully gets wrapped up so the wrestlers (and fans) can have a breather.
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Backlash 2003 Date: April 27, 2003 Location: Worcester Centrum, Worcester, Massachusetts Attendance: 10,000 Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler
If WWE held the least important pay per view in recent memory, does it matter in the slightest? This is a glorified Raw pay per view with a handful of Smackdown matches thrown in to fill out the card. It’s a really bad time for WWE at the moment and I don’t remember looking forward to a pay per view less than this one in a long time. Let’s get to it.
The opening video looks at Rock vs. Goldberg, which is billed as a dream match (fair enough) but the build really hasn’t done it any favors. No other matches are mentioned.
As a side note: Scott Steiner beat Rico in the dark match. I know you hear about how big of a collapse his WWE run was but my goodness I never realized it was this bad.
Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Team Angle vs. Los Guerreros
Eddie and Chavo are challenging. Team Angle brings out a framed picture of Kurt, complete with medals hanging off the corner. Haas starts with Eddie with the champ getting rolled up a few times for some early near falls. It’s off to Chavo, who stops to lay over the top rope for a bit of fun.
Benjamin comes in as well and Chavo actually wrestles him down, which only seems to give Benjamin a bit more of a serious look. A knee to the back slows Chavo down but Eddie gets in one of his own to keep Benjamin in trouble. What’s good for the champ is good for the Guerrero perhaps? Eddie gets in a few cheap shots on the floor and puts something into his boot. The slingshot hilo gets two as this has been all Guerreros to start.
For some reason Eddie lets Shelton tag out and some choking from the apron lets the champs take over. Shelton does the jump over Haas spot for two before slapping on one of his own. A powerslam sets up another chinlock as the match has slowed considerably. Haas comes in to stay on the back but a few kicks to the head allow Eddie to make the hot tag.
Heel miscommunication puts both champs in the corner but Shelton gives Chavo a good looking powerbomb. Eddie is right back in with Three Amigos to Charlie and Chavo gets a very near fall. A great looking frog splash crushes Haas so Chavo can get two more with Shelton making the last minute (perhaps post last minute) save. Chavo tries a suplex but it’s the Bobby Heenan Wrestlemania V finish with Shelton holding his foot so Haas can get the pin to retain the titles.
Rating: B-. Good choice for an opener here with the mostly fast paced action and a few hot near falls near the end. They got some time to make this work as well and it was a better match as a result. Eddie and Chavo will be fine as they’re so smooth in the ring that they can make almost anyone look better than they can on their own.
Post match, Los Guerreros jump the champs and steal the belts, leaving in a great looking green car.
Torrie Wilson tells Test to stop calling her but he keeps hitting on her anyway. Test calls her a tease for being in Playboy and insists that she wants him. Being a human, Torrie says no because A, he’s Test and B, she’s Stacy Keibler’s friend. Torrie goes to leave but Test pulls her back and kisses her. She storms off as Sable looks on with a rather evil smile. This storyline just went from stupid to REALLY bad n near record time.
Before the next match, here’s Roddy Piper with a basket full of coconuts. Piper: “I have a loverly bunch of coconuts.” He introduces Sean O’Haire and promises that he’ll teach Rikishi that everyone pays the piper. When purchasing coconuts perhaps?
Sean O’Haire vs. Rikishi
Rikishi wins a slugout on the floor to start and throws O’Haire inside for the opening bell. An early Samoan drop gets no cover as Rikishi has to go after Piper, allowing Sean to get in a superkick. We hit the neck crank with some kicks to the back thrown in for good measure. The fans keep booing something in the crowd as Rikishi fights up and splashes O’Haire in the corner.
Sean pretty easily kicks away the Stinkface as Piper gets inside with the coconut. That goes nowhere as a double superkick puts both guys down. Piper comes in again but gets coconutted to the head. The distraction is enough for O’Haire to hit the reverse Death Valley Driver for the pin.
Rating: D-. Terrible match of course but points for putting someone young over. I know the focus is on Piper (not a surprise) but at least they’re trying to push someone fresh. I’d come up with something other than the Snuka vs. Piper feud from twenty years ago, though at least they don’t have Snuka getting back in the ring. Yet at least.
Sable tells Stacy that Torrie kissed Test and even gave him the advance copy of Playboy a few weeks ago. I’ve started typing a few different things about how stupid this is but I think it speaks for itself. I mean…..Eugene was presented as ten times smarter than Stacy in this segment.
Rob Van Dam likes being a champion but says it doesn’t matter what happens tonight because Chief Morely (guest referee, as announced on Heat) won’t let he and Kane retain. Kane says they’ll take everyone down with them.
Raw Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Dudley Boyz
The Dudleys are defending and Morely is guest referee. Bubba jumps Van Dam from behind to start but a quick leg trip gets him out of trouble. A standoff slows things down but more importantly allows Van Dam to hit that signature pose. Bubba drops him with a right hand and does the same pose to a rather negative reaction. It’s off to D-Von vs. Kane as this is already feeling like a glorified Raw match. The abundant amount of empty chairs would seem to back up that theory.
A big boot gives Kane two and it’s back to Bubba to change things up a bit. The fans want tables but have to settle for Kane getting two off a spinebuster instead. Morely hasn’t been much of a factor so far. Van Dam’s split legged moonsault is good for two but it’s time for some good old fashioned cheating. D-Von comes in sans tag to draw Kane in as well, meaning Van Dam has to take What’s Up.
It’s off to a chinlock and Bubba actually comes in with a basement dropkick. Rob finally gets in a kick to the face and the hot tag brings in Kane. Everything breaks down and it’s Rob’s top rope kick to D-Von’s face. Rolling Thunder hits Bubba but Kane comes back in with the top rope clothesline to D-Von.
Morely finally does something by hitting Kane low but a second swing hits Bubba in the jaw by mistake. That’s enough for D-Von who beats on Morely but Lance Storm comes in with a springboard clothesline. Bubba dispatches Lance without too much effort and it’s a 3D to Morely. Kane grabs a chokeslam on Bubba and the Five Star is enough for the pin from another referee.
Rating: C-. Overbooking aside, this wasn’t half bad but it was really just a longer version of what they do on Raw most of the time. The story is out of gas at this point and unfortunately that ending is likely to see it continue for whatever reason. The division needs more teams and hopefully the evil French guys can help out a bit.
Since this story hasn’t gone on long enough, Stacy goes to see Torrie, who says Test kissed her. Stacy doesn’t buy it and a cat fight is on. I have no idea why most of these women are here when they’re not on the card, nor why Ivory is in a towel despite not having a match.
Women’s Title: Jazz vs. Trish Stratus
Trish is defending and comes in banged up. We get a staredown early on until Trish actually takes her down without too much effort. A backbreaker gets Jazz out of trouble and we hit the double chickenwing. Trish gets thrown down by the hair and Jazz sits on her ribs for good measure. The comeback is short lived as Trish charges into a boot in the corner and the Stratusphere is countered into something like a super Styles Clash.
Jazz goes with a weak half crab but Trish reverses into the full thing. The Chick Kick gets two and Stratusfaction gets the same with Teddy Long throwing in a shoe (make your own Austin Powers joke) for the save. The referee believes that Teddy didn’t do it, despite the fact that HE’S ONLY WEARING ONE SHOE! Trish tries a sunset flip but Jazz sits down on it and grabs the rope for the pin and the title.
Rating: C+. Rather solid match with a finish that felt like it belonged in the NWA. Above all else though they both looked comfortable out there, which is a big step up from most of the women around this company. Good little match here and the finish should hopefully help set up some fresh challengers for the title in the not so distant future.
Booker, Shawn and Nash agree to trust each other but Nash wants HHH for himself. Well they would be the only ones to want that match.
We recap Big Show vs. Rey Mysterio, which is entirely built around a single 619 that knocked Show down. For some reason, this warrants a pay per view match.
Big Show vs. Rey Mysterio
Rey trips him down to start and Show is annoyed again, earning Mysterio a toss into the corner. One of the hardest chops you’ll ever see or hear has Rey’s eyes bugging out of the mask and he rolls outside. Back in and Show stands on the chest for a bit until Rey slips out of a gorilla press. Some right hands stagger Show but Rey heads outside again, this time for a chair. The referee is conveniently knocked away so Mysterio can get in a chair shot, followed by the springboard seated senton for two. A 619 to the leg sets up a 619 to the face but the West Coast Pop is countered into the chokeslam to give Show the pin.
Rating: D-. Well that happened. I have no idea why this needed to be on pay per view as they could have either done the exact same thing on Smackdown or had Mysterio face Matt Hardy for the Cruiserweight Title here. But no, the solution was to give Big Show a squash win, likely so he can have a big match next month. And of course Mysterio is the only person you can put in here against him because you can’t have show win a competitive match against a name of equal value (Benoit would have been a better choice). Putting this on pay per view in this form was ridiculous and more booking that makes my head hurt.
Mysterio does a stretcher job but Show picks him up and swings the backboard (with Rey still attached) against the post. Just in case you didn’t get the entire idea from the match you see. The bump looked great though.
HHH, Ric Flair and Chris Jericho are ready for the wholesome trio tonight.
Torrie and Stacy get in another fight until Scott Steiner saves Stacy. Test FINALLY returns to yell at Steiner for carry Stacy to the trainer.
We recap Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena. Lesnar won the title at Wrestlemania and Cena has been calling him out both before and since the title win. Cena then won a tournament to earn the shot so it’s an actually well built match. Unfortunately it’s also the biggest match on the Smackdown side and feels like a slightly glorified TV main event.
Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena
Cena comes out in a Yankees jersey which must have his skin crawling. His rap talks about how he’s going to be added to the list of great champions, meaning he’s crazy like Mankind and coming at you from so many angles that you’ll call him Kurt. Cena jumps him at the bell and slugs away but you can only do that for so long against Brock. Two backbreakers into a fall away slam has Cena in trouble and Brock at the cut on his forehead from Smackdown.
A front facelock keeps Cena in trouble as Tazz goes into his rare yet useful explanation of how to get out of a hold. Brock stomps away in the corner and there’s a gorilla press for good measure. Cena wisely bails out to the floor and grabs a chair but settles for throwing Lesnar into the steps instead. The cut is busted open so Cena slugs away back inside. A running shoulder sends Lesnar to the apron and there’s the middle rope Fameasser to put him fully outside.
Back in and we hit a chinlock for a good while before a DDT gives Cena two. Lesnar grabs a spinebuster to put both guys down for a breather as Cole starts talking about momentum. Tazz thinks whoever is up first might have the advantage. Thanks for that analysis there buddy. Cena is back up with a chinlock and a bodyscissors for a rather long while.
Back up and Cena gets driven into the corner for the break and it’s comeback time. Some clotheslines and a powerslam give Lesnar two. Cena is smart enough to almost send Lesnar into the referee, allowing John to hit a low blow for two more. It’s chain time but a quick F5 retains the title.
Rating: C-. Pretty watchable match (save for that long chinlock) but there was no hiding the fact that Cena was in way over his head and had almost no chance to win the title. Lesnar did what he could and sold a lot, though there’s only so much you can do when the ending is never in doubt. Cena would have his day of course but it just wasn’t here yet.
We recap the six man tag, which was all about who is Nash’s best friend. In other words, it’s a story that all of five people are interested in and for some reason we have to do this six man tag instead of HHH vs. Booker T. II here and Nash doing his hair somewhere instead. This is little more than a pit stop before Nash gets his big singles title match that isn’t interest in and no one wants to see anyway. This gets the music video treatment because it’s the big match in the eyes of the people who matter the most around here.
Kevin Nash/Shawn Michaels/Booker T. vs. HHH/Ric Flair/Chris Jericho
Nash wants to start with HHH but thankfully we do Shawn vs. Jericho instead. Jericho punches away in the corner but Shawn speeds things up and starts a pinfall reversal sequence. A Walls attempt is broken up and it’s off to Nash to hammer on the arm. Jericho skins the cat (I still want to know how it got that name) but Nash is smart enough to be right there with a big boot.
It’s off to Booker, who scores with a kick to HHH’s jaw, only to get caught in the facebuster. The spinebuster puts Booker down and it’s off to Flair for the old school portion. Shawn comes in off a missed elbow drop and house is quickly cleaned. Sweet Chin Music connects but HHH is right there with a Pedigree for the save. HHH and Flair take turns beating on Shawn until it’s off to Jericho for a hard belly to back.
Now the villains start in on the knee but an enziguri puts Flair down. That’s enough for the hot tag to Nash and we get the showdown with HHH. I’m sure the fans are all going to start cheering as soon as the shock wears off so ignore that silence thing. Snake Eyes and the side slam are good for two on HHH with Flair making the save. The chops have no effect with Nash fixing his hair while Ric fires them off.
Everything breaks down and Booker ax kicks Jericho to set up the Spinarooni. Sweet Chin Music is broken up and Flair grabs the Figure Four as Nash loads up the announcers’ table. He comes in for the save instead (how nice of him) but shoves Flair into the referee. The sledgehammer to the head puts Nash away.
Rating: D. So yeah, instead of doing HHH vs. Booker and Shawn vs. Jericho or Flair, we’re stuck with HHH beating Nash to likely set up HHH vs. Nash for the title. As usual, 2003 makes my head hurt and somehow we’re not even close to done with this story. The match wasn’t the worst by any stretch but sweet goodness it was boring and not the way to make me want to see anything else on Raw.
We look back at Mysterio being destroyed in case you didn’t get the idea the first time.
The update on Rey: there is no update.
Long recap of Rock vs. Goldberg, which doesn’t really have much of a story. Rock is coming off beating Steve Austin at Wrestlemania and Goldberg just showed up to attack him. The match was agreed to and Goldberg has been chasing him since. It’s basically Rock being a huge star and someone getting to beat him before he heads to Hollywood permanently.
Rock says he’ll win and doesn’t care much about Goldberg. This felt like nothing but the time filler that it was. The fans chant for Rock all over again.
The Rock vs. Goldberg
The entrances take a long time and Rock hits the floor before the bell as they’re hitting the stall button hard here. They stare each other down as the match hasn’t actually started yet. We’re finally ready to go after several minutes of killing time, which isn’t what this show needed. Goldberg shoves him away off the lockup, which isn’t that surprising as Rock isn’t known as a power guy.
They do it again with Rock falling to the floor this time around. Back in and Rock slaps him in the face, only to get run over with a shoulder. Rock bails again as the announcers debate music. We hit another long stall until Rock snaps him throat first across the top. Goldberg grabs a Rock Bottom but takes way too long on the spear, allowing Rock to send him into the post. The Sharpshooter goes on for a bit before Rock goes with a low blow.
That means nothing either and it’s a spear to cut Rock down. No Jackhammer though as Goldberg gets two off a slam instead. Good grief END THIS SHOW ALREADY. Rock hits a spear of his own (called a spinebuster by Coach, which isn’t that far off actually) and the Rock Bottom gets two. Now the spinebuster actually connects and the People’s Elbow gets two more. Goldberg pops up, hits a spear, ignores the GOLDBERG SUCKS chant, adds a second spear, and finishes with the Jackhammer.
Rating: D-. This was about as dumb as they could have gone with Goldberg doing the same kind of match that every WWE main eventer has with the multiple finishers and trading moves instead of doing the formula that got him over in the first place. It was a completely terrible debut match with Rock’s selling alone completely outshining everything Goldberg did.
Compare this Goldberg match to his recent return (true story: he wrestled more in this match than in a match, a Royal Rumble appearance, a title win and a title defense) and look at which got better reactions, more entertaining matches and just more success overall. It’s not hard to figure out why one was better than the other and a lot of it has to do with booking Goldberg like Goldberg and not like any other star.
Overall Rating: F. The problem here is much more based around this show not being necessary, at least not in this form. The Smackdown stuff was completely unnecessary with most of the blue matches being TV worthy at best and horrible at worst. If you can’t even fit Chris Benoit, Matt Hardy and Undertaker on the show (yet there was time for FOUR Stacy/Test/Torrie segments), just cut the Smackdown part out and let it be a Raw pay per view. Turn the six man into HHH vs. Booker II for the title and do Shawn vs. Jericho II with Jericho getting his win back while Nash is guest enforcer or something.
Then there’s the show itself, which peaked at a just somewhat above average Team Angle vs. Los Guerreros opener. The wrestling was terrible throughout with matches either not needing to exist or being so uninteresting that there was no reason to care about them. This show felt like it was running overtime and didn’t even make it to two hours and forty five minutes. It was an awful show which could have either been a standalone Raw show or just not existed and I don’t think anyone would have really noticed. Just awful stuff all around and a really bad sign of things to come.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:
Backlash 2017 Date: May 21, 2017
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield
It’s time for another Smackdown exclusive, which could mean things are hit or miss tonight. The card isn’t exactly the best with Jinder Mahal challenging Smackdown World Champion Randy Orton and AJ Styles challenging Kevin Owens for the US Title. Other than that though, this is kind of a stretch for a pay per view. Let’s get to it.
Kickoff Show: Tye Dillinger vs. Aiden English
This is their third match and this time English sings himself to the ring. Dillinger starts with the ten but English says this is his town (which it actually is). English starts cheating to send Dillinger into the corner though and the posing takes us to an early break. Back with Dillinger working on a chinlock until the comeback starts up. Tye knocks him down and drops a knee before hitting the ten left hands in the corner. Aiden gets in an elbow but misses a Swanton, allowing the Tyebreaker to finish him off at 8:18.
Rating: C-. This was all you would have expected it to be and there’s nothing wrong with that. I don’t think anyone is taking Dillinger seriously as a major star right now but there’s a lot of value in having a cheer/signature deal that’s going to wake the fans up every single time. The TEN thing is going to work so just stick with the classics.
The opening video doesn’t have much of a theme but it does touch on almost all of tonight’s matches.
Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Dolph Ziggler
Makes sense for the opener and DEAR GOODNESS do the fans love Nakamura. Feeling out process to start with Ziggler not being able to do much, other than be told to bring it. Nakamura takes him into the corner and starts picking up Good Vibrations. Dolph grabs the neckbreaker over the ropes and slaps on a chinlock as the fans are actually split.
Ziggler’s dropkick and the Shot to the Heart get two but Nakamura kicks him in the head to take over again. The running knee in the ribs connects as they’re not exactly going crazy out there. A triangle doesn’t last very long with Ziggler making the ropes. It’s way too early for Kinshasa so Ziggler hits the Fameasser for two.
Ziggler tunes up the band but has to settle for the Zig Zag for another near fall. A powerbomb of all things is broken up and Nakamura kicks him in the head again, only to get superkicked in the back of the head. That’s not enough either so Ziggler tries a single leg, earning himself some knees to the head. The middle rope Kinshasa misses but the regular version is good for the pin on Ziggler at 15:48.
Rating: B. Certainly not a classic but it was a fine way for Nakamura to show that he was there. I don’t think anyone was expecting a masterpiece here but Nakamura just doing the greatest hits is getting a bit old. He’s pretty much lived off his reputation from the Zayn match and hasn’t gotten back to that point since. I’m not saying he can’t but I’d like to see it again. Then again, maybe it’s because this was the dark match at the last two house shows I’ve been to so there’s not much of a fresh factor here.
Here’s the full Fashion Files segment from Tuesday to fill time.
Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Breezango
Breezango is challenging and Breeze is still in the janitor costume, complete with mustache and mop. Jimmy comes at him and gets stopped with a mop to the fact. That earns Tyler a superkick and the mop is broken, much to the fans’ annoyance. Fandango comes in for some hip gyrating….and Breeze is now dressed as an old woman, complete with blue hair, a dress and a cane. Fans: “LET’S GO GRANDMA!”
We get the standard set of spots: flashing and the Bronco Buster, only to have Jimmy kick him down as well. JBL goes along with the whole gag and gets a dress thrown at his head. Jimmy goes shoulder first into the post and the hot tag brings in Fandango. Everything breaks down and Jey is sent outside, leaving Jimmy to take an Unprettier for two. Breeze is sent over the barricade but comes right back with a dive to take them down. JBL says these guys are about to win the titles and it’s a superkick to Fandango to retain the titles at 9:12.
Rating: C. This is going to vary quite a bit depending on your taste. I’m a big Breezango fan so I liked some of the jokes, but, as usual, JBL really hurt things here with all of his talking about how funny things were. It’s the beating you over the head with the COMEDY that gets old and JBL is horrible about it. I’m fine with Breezango not winning here but hopefully they stick around.
We recap Sami Zayn vs. Baron Corbin, which is your standard bully vs. underdog story. Corbin has jumped Zayn multiple times now and Sami is fighting back.
Sami Zayn vs. Baron Corbin
Zayn starts fast and sends Corbin to the floor for the flip dive, only to have Corbin bail away. Sami isn’t willing to wait and dives onto Corbin to send him into the barricade as it’s one sided early on. Back in and Corbin starts the power game with some forearms and a bearhug to slow things down. A spinebuster drops Zayn again and his high crossbody is good for two.
Another shot to the back slows him down though and a chokebreaker gives Corbin two more. He takes Sami up top, only to get taken down with a sunset bomb for a nice near fall. Sami’s tornado DDT is broken up and Corbin makes things even worse by blocking the exploder in the corner.
Instead he grabs two more off a crucifix, only to walk into Deep Six for another two. They’re trading near falls here and it’s not half bad. Sami gets sent outside but comes back in with a boot to the face, followed by the Helluva Kick for the clean pin at 14:19. JBL is rather stunned by the upset and I can’t say I blame him.
Rating: B-. Cool. They told a good story here with Sami hanging in there as long as he could until he caught Corbin with his one big move. Corbin can win the rematch but at some point they had to give Sami a big win to keep his credibility. I’m very surprised here and that’s not a bad thing. Good match and a win that Sami probably needed more.
Xavier Woods, Ember Moon, Zack Ryder and someone else play Rocket League on Up Up Down Down.
Jinder Mahal and the Singh Brothers arrive an hour and twelve minutes into the show. Tonight he’s going to turn this city into a beautiful thing despite everything thinking he’s evil and horrible. We hear some Punjabi with Mahal promising to become champion.
Welcoming Committee vs. Charlotte/Becky Lynch/Naomi
Lynch has a long red mohawk tonight and gets thrown into the corner for her efforts. It’s off to Charlotte to take over on Natalya but the strutting gets her in trouble as she’s knocked into the Welcoming Committee corner. That doesn’t last long either though as it’s off to Naomi, who takes the beating for her team as well.
Becky gets pulled off the apron to prevent another tag though and Tamina gets two off a Samoan drop. The second attempt at the hot tag works a bit better and Becky comes in with the Bexploder for two on Natalya. Carmella has to break up the Disarm-Her and Tamina adds a shot of her own, setting up the Sharpshooter to make Becky tap at 10:07.
Rating: D+. This was as uninteresting as you would have expected it to be and that’s fine. The Welcoming Committee needed this win and as stupid of an idea as they are, they should have gone over here. Becky taking the fall is fine and the best option, especially if it leads to her joining the team (not logical but the best choice).
We recap the US Title. It’s another simple story: the Face of America vs. the Face That Runs the Place. Owens is extra smug lately but has shown how violent he can get against Chris Jericho.
US Title: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens
Owens is defending. AJ is all fired up to start so Owens bails, only to have them switch places with AJ smirking a bit. Back in and AJ scores with a dropkick but Owens just blasts him with a clothesline to take over. We hit the chinlock with Owens demanding to ASK HIM, followed by a DDT and two backsplashes for two. Owens spends a bit too much time talking trash though and gets caught in belly to back faceplant.
The fireman’s carry flip into a backbreaker gives AJ two and he smiles a bit. Styles takes too long going up top though and gets caught with a superkick, followed by a big double underhook into a neckbreaker for a cool looking move. Owens isn’t done as he sends AJ outside with Styles’ knees going into the steps. A Cannonball against the barricade sets up a Cannonball against the leg in the corner as Owens certainly has a target.
We hit a half crab and an ankle lock of all things but AJ has fought Kurt Angle before and dives over to the ropes. Owens takes him up for a superplex but gets pulled down with a sunset bomb for two, only to have the Phenomenal Forearm broken up. A double underhook implant DDT gives Owens two but frustration starts to set in, allowing AJ to score with the Pele.
Now it’s Styles taking him to the top for a superplex, meaning Owens can use the swinging superplex for two more. They head to the apron with AJ getting in a suplex on the apron but both guys are done. Owens throws him into the timekeeper’s area but eats a Phenomenal Forearm. AJ isn’t done though and loads up the Styles Clash on the top with JBL freaking out. His foot actually goes through a hole in the table though and Owens beats the count back in at 21:09.
Rating: B+. Oh yeah that worked. These two beat the heck out of each other and traded bombs until Styles literally slipped and fell for the loss. You know there’s going to be a great rematch and that’s going to be awesome as well. I had a blast with this match and it’s easily the second best match of the weekend (nothing was touching that UK Title match though).
We look at the Kickoff Show match.
Erick Rowan vs. Luke Harper
This would be the cool down match. They take turns driving each other into the corner to start before taking a quick trip outside. Back in and Rowan starts throwing Harper around as the announcers recap the history between these two. Rowan misses a top rope splash though and bails to the floor, allowing Harper to hit one heck of a suicide dive. Back in and Harper’s slingshot hilo gets two, followed by Rowan powerbombing him for the same. A slugout doesn’t get anyone anywhere so Rowan clotheslines him down. That means it’s time to go talk to the mask, allowing Harper to get in a discus lariat for the pin at 8:26.
Rating: D+. This was fine for what it was supposed to be as the fans get a much needed breather after the outstanding US Title match. These two aren’t the most interesting pairing in the world but they’re fine for two people hitting each other with big power moves for a few minutes. I’m sure we’ll get a rematch here too.
We recap the Smackdown World Title match. Jinder Mahal won a Six Pack Challenge and has attacked Randy Orton a few times, including stealing the title belt for a week or so.
Smackdown World Title: Randy Orton vs. Jinder Mahal
Orton is defending and attacks Mahal before the bell. The beating goes on for a bit until things are separated Jinder is ready to go. Orton is right back on top of him and hammers Mahal all over the ring, including taking him outside for a beating on the floor. Mahal gets in a shot to the arm and takes over though, setting up a variety of armbars back inside.
With the offense that limited, Orton sends him shoulder first into the post to get a breather and grabs the superplex to put both guys down. Orton throws him with a fall away slam for two, followed by a neckbreaker from Mahal for the same. They head outside with Orton beating up the Singh Brothers, allowing Mahal to post the bad arm.
Not that it matters as Orton throws him back inside for the RKO, only to have the Singh Brothers pull Mahal outside. The Brothers are thrown onto the announcers’ tables, followed by a double hanging DDT back inside. Mahal sneaks in though and grabs the Khallas for the pin and the title at 16:47.
Rating: D. So yeah that happened. I have no idea what to think about it but yeah that happened. I’m sure this is going to end next month in St. Louis at Money in the Bank but hey, at least Bray Wyatt lost the title to Orton for a good reason right? The match was what you would expect from these two of course but…..dang yeah that just happened.
We get a long celebration and a ton of fan reaction shots to end the show.
Overall Rating: C-. It wasn’t bad and the ending was a big surprise but that doesn’t mean it’s something that should have happened. This show really didn’t need to exist but that’s what you have to get to keep those subscribers coming in. The main event is the definition of throwing the title around like a prop, which is annoying and something we just kind of have to live with. Not a horrible show by any means but nothing you need to go out of your way to see, save for the US Title match.
Results
Shinsuke Nakamura b. Dolph Ziggler – Kinshasa
Usos b. Breezango – Superkick to Fandango
Sami Zayn b. Baron Corbin – Helluva Kick
Welcoming Committee b. Naomi/Charlotte/Becky Lynch – Sharpshooter to Lynch
Kevin Owens b. AJ Styles via countout
Luke Harper b. Erick Rowan – Discus lariat
Jinder Mahal b. Randy Orton – Khallas
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Histories of Saturday Night’s Main Event and Clash of the Champions, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:
It’s nice to have Backlash back where it belongs as the whole September slot didn’t feel right last year. I’m not sure if the show is going to be that much better as historically it’s more a show of Wrestlemania rematches, but why do that when you can do a mostly new card? This show doesn’t have the most hype coming in and after “Takeover: Chicago”, they have quite the hill to climb. Let’s get to it.
Kickoff Show: Tye Dillinger vs. Aiden English
Having one guy win two matches and then doing a third match worked for Steve Austin and the Rock so it can work here too right? Dillinger debuted on the main roster about a month and a half ago and has kind of toiled around the lower midcard since. Fighting English over and over again hasn’t done much for him but it’s gotten English more TV time than he’s had in months.
Of course I’m going with Dillinger, unless they want to kill one of the hottest crowds they’re going to have all year right off the bat. English is going to need some changes if he’s going to survive but I don’t think that’s going to happen here. To be fair though, it’s not like a win in a glorified dark match is going to do him a lot of good. Just give this seven minutes or so though and let Dillinger get a win.
Baron Corbin vs. Sami Zayn
I might have overreacted to Corbin losing to Randy Orton the other night but he should be fine coming into this match. Their reason for fighting isn’t all that great but it’s a good way to get both of them on pay per view, where they belong. Corbin has cooled off considerably since losing at “Wrestlemania XXXIII” (not that it matters though as the Kickoff Show matches aren’t on the DVD/Blu-Ray) but this could help him get back.
As much as I want to go with Zayn here, Corbin makes more sense. Just give him the win and let him start getting back on his feet. Orton vs. Corbin would work fine for a major match, as would Corbin winning Money in the Bank. As much as Zayn needs a win as a member of the “Smackdown Live” roster, Corbin needs it more at the moment. Unfortunately that’s the case far more often than not for Zayn and it’s going to become a problem one day.
Luke Harper vs. Eric Rowan
Speaking of things that are going to get tiresome if they happen too much. These two have been fighting or at least associated with each other for years now and I really don’t have much interest in watching them have another match. Rowan really isn’t all that interesting but he’s big and that earns him a push.
I’ll take Harper winning here as it gives them a reason for another match down the line because WWE likes trilogies. I’m not sure what we’re supposed to get out of this match, especially after they had a boring TV match a few weeks back. At least the match should be a good food break moment as this just isn’t the kind of match that a lot of fans are going to care about.
Naomi/Charlotte/Becky Lynch vs. Welcoming Committee
I get why the match exists (they want to save Charlotte’s big matches with the top “Smackdown Live” women) but that doesn’t mean the Welcoming Committee is a good idea. It’s basically three women and James Ellsworth banding together because they’re scared of Charlotte but none of them have an interesting personality between them, making the whole thing all the more annoying.
That being said, I’ll take the Welcoming Committee to win here so Charlotte can yell at Naomi or Lynch for the loss. My initial thought was Carmella takes the loss as she seems to be the potential star of the team but hopefully the trio’s plug is pulled in the near future. It’s not likely to be all that entertaining but that’s par for the course on a lot of these matches.
Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Breezango
What the heck happened to American Alpha? They lost the titles and I don’t remember seeing them again since. Maybe we could have more time for them if we didn’t need the Welcoming Committee or Rowan vs. Harper in a hoss battle that people don’t care about. Maybe we could have some time to build them up and give them some personality (you know, the thing that GOT THEM OVER IN NXT) to go with the wrestling ability. Oh yeah this match.
The Usos retain of course because WWE freaking loves these guys, even though they really only appear to speak in that weird promo style of theirs for about thirty seconds a week. I’ve been loving the Fashion Files vignettes but I have a bad feeling this is it for Breezango and they’ll just fade away as a result. At least it’s been a fun time getting here.
Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Dolph Ziggler
I’ve seen this match twice now as post-show dark matches and I have a feeling that’s not going to be the best indicator of what we’ll see here. WWE is pushing the heck out of Nakamura as we come into this show and that makes for some lofty expectations. That being said, if Nakamura showed me one thing in Dallas, it’s that he knows how to make a good first impression.
Of course I’m taking Nakamura as there’s no reason to believe that Ziggler will or should win here. Nakamura is going to be a major star on the show and I could easily see him going after a title as soon as “Summerslam 2017”. There’s not much of a point in waiting with him so having him beat the heck out of Ziggler in a star making performance is a great place to start.
US Title: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens
This match hasn’t had the strongest build in the world and I’m starting to get worried about it. If nothing else, they’re running a really strong chance of underwhelming due to the incredibly high expectations. I’m just hoping we don’t get a match where the prevailing wisdom is “eh it’s Styles vs. Owens” and it’s just phoned in.
I’ll take Styles to win here as it seems there’s more interest in Owens doing the chasing than actually holding the title, or at least that’s been the case for most of his title reigns. There are a lot more options to go after champion Styles than Owens, who could easily move up to going after Orton, assuming he retains the title.
Smackdown World Title: Randy Orton vs. Jinder Mahal
And then there’s this, which really does seem to be a way to boost the Indian markets (and possibly screw with TNA before they head over there for some live events). That also explains why we’ve got the Singh Brothers in Mahal’s corner instead of, you know, someone actually intimidating (like the Authors of Pain for example). This is the definition of throwing together a challenger, though to be fair this is what we always ask for: a fresh opponent we haven’t seen before. Now we get it and despite the building him up well, people aren’t interested in Mahal.
Unfortunately I think we’re going to keep going with this story as Mahal wins by DQ or countout and we get a rematch at “Money in the Bank 2017” in Orton hometown of St. Louis. As usual, WWE sacrifices their core audience for the sake of whatever their long term planning is, as people are really bored with Mahal but that’s what we’re getting no matter how many people change the channel.
Overall, this feels exactly like a filler pay per view, which is one of the worst things you can have if it goes badly. Having low expectations coming in can help a lot but at the same time, you run the risk of having a horrible show that feels more like torture than something entertaining. Maybe the show will be good but there seems to be very little that has my interest. If Orton vs. Mahal goes to a DQ to end the show, Chicago isn’t going to react well and that’s a very risky move.
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Let’s move on to the far more entertaining part of these things: the bad side. There’s less to cover here but we’re going to start with one of the big ones: the Worst Major Show of the Year. WWE is notorious for being able to put on some horrible shows and today we’re going to look at what their absolute worst of the year really was. I know some of these might not be the worst shows but they’re the worst options available. These are in no particular order, as usual.
1. Tables Ladders and Chairs
We’ll start with one of the last major shows of the year as we look at “Smackdown Live’s” last offering. This is always an odd show because it’s almost all about the gimmicks and the violence. The problem with that is it forces a lot of matches into gimmicks that really don’t need to exist in the first place. For instance, was there any reason for Kalisto vs. Baron Corbin to be a chairs match other than the show required that one exist?
It also didn’t help that most of the matches were just ok at best. The main event (AJ Styles vs. Dean Ambrose in the show’s namesake match for the Smackdown World Title) was by far the best thing about the show but it really wasn’t strong enough to make up for a rather lackluster show. That tends to be the case with this show almost every year and that’s not a good thing.
“Tables Ladders and Chairs 2016” was a watchable enough show but that doesn’t mean it’s a show that needs to exist. I’ve never been a fan of having these shows because the calendar says so and it’s rarely proven to work. On top of that, the use of these gimmick matches on a single show weakens those gimmicks later on in the year. We can’t have a TLC match when the show calls for it other than there’s one at the end of the year just because it’s December. That doesn’t make sense and it almost never works.
2. Payback
I went back and forth on this one for a long time but the more I thought about it, the more I thought of the annoying decisions and how many of them I have to sit through today. This was the show where we had a Natalya vs. Charlotte match end in a Montreal Screwjob reference for the sake of keeping the title on a Flair. I mean, ignore the fact that IT WAS NINETEEN YEARS AGO and add in the fact that it was for another Charlotte vs. Natalya match when the fans were begging for Sasha Banks.
Other than that we had what should have been the layup of the summer with Cesaro winning the Intercontinental Title from Miz. The champ tapped but AGAIN WWE found a way to avoid giving Cesaro a big win for the sake of…..well to be fair Miz keeping the title wasn’t the worst thing in the world but it really should have been Cesaro getting the title for a change.
Now, that being said, there were two Match of the Year candidates on the show and that should have been enough to make the show great. However, those two big issues are just enough to pull it down to the lower levels of the shows this year. It might not be the worst but those two decisions were so annoying that they took so much of my enjoyment away from the rest of the show.
3. Fastlane
Now we’re getting somewhere. Fastlane wasn’t anything interesting in 2015 and that’s the case again with “Fastlane 2016”. They might as well just call the show “Filler 2016” or “Annual Car Themed Show” and it would be just about the same. Most of the wrestling went nowhere and the main event only confirmed the obvious “Wrestlemania XXXII” main event that we all knew was coming.
If the triple threat between Roman Reigns, Dean Ambrose and Brock Lesnar wasn’t clear enough, we also had a live interview with Edge and Christian talking to New Day (which was nowhere near as funny as you might expect) and Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth on a pay per view. Is that really the best you can do on a three hour pay per view? A lot of the wrestling was tolerable but really, this just didn’t need to exist.
That sums up “Fastlane 2016” as perfectly as anything else could: the show didn’t need to exist. Stephanie basically made the main event on a whim and that made it illogical to go along with the fact that it wasn’t really interesting. The show was watchable but pay per views really should be more than just filler, which is all “Fastlane 2016” really was.
4. Roadblock: End of the Line
This is a show that really isn’t going to age well and I’m not really surprised. Overall, this show really didn’t need to exist and I think everyone knew it. The biggest problem here, as is the case so often on “Monday Night Raw”, is the lack of interest in the main event. The wrestling itself was fine with Kevin Owens defending against Reigns being fine but absolutely nothing interesting whatsoever.
The problem really boils down to the fact that nothing feels special. It’s not a show that I’m ever going to want to watch again and that’s rarely a good sign. I spent most of the show waiting on it to end and only enjoyed parts of it because some of the wrestling was good. This really is a case where the individual parts don’t add up to the whole score which doesn’t fill you with hope.
Finally, there’s the name. Was there really no other name available than Roadblock, which already took place back in February? Come up with any generic name (Vengeance, No Way Out, Over the Limit etc) and forget this whole obsession with car names. They hammer the idea in well enough and then have such a boring build that the show is only good in spite of its card. That’s really not too good.
5. Backlash
“Smackdown Live” started having its own pay per view as well and for the most part the show was spent crowning new champions. The entire roster was basically brand new and starting from scratch, meaning they had almost nothing going on coming in. Ambrose was the Smackdown World Champion but wound up losing the belt to Styles in the only really good match of the night.
Aside from that, the Usos wrestled twice, Kane defeated Bray Wyatt and Dolph Ziggler managed to lose another match, which was apparently even more important than his World Title shot back at “Summerslam 2016”. You really could have accomplished most of these things on a few major episodes of “Smackdown Live” instead of doing all of it on one pay per view, but they didn’t have much else to use to fill in a pay per view.
You could probably attribute a lot of the issues on the show to not having enough time to really establish things before getting to a pay per view. Then again, that’s how so much works in WWE: it doesn’t matter what’s going on in the stories because it’s all about getting things going as quickly as possible. If that means the pay per view doesn’t need to exist and suffers as a result, so be it.
6. Wrestlemania XXXII
Oh boy we had to get to this one eventually. Where do I even start with this one? Ah well how about with the run time? If you take away the two hour pre-show, this was still a nearly five hour wrestling show and that’s WAY too long. This problem came from the simple fact of having too much crammed onto the show. Be it Rock taking nine minutes to get to the ring, Undertaker vs. Shane McMahon taking half an hour (not even counting entrances and post match stuff) or the main event going twenty seven minutes in front of a worn out crowd, this was too long of a show.
The build wasn’t great either and a lot of that is due to injuries. It’s fairly clear that the big Undertaker match was supposed to be against Cena but, due to the injuries up and down the card, the best we could get was McMahon. Now, in theory, that match probably shouldn’t have gone half an hour but then McMahon doesn’t get to do his big dive off the cage and that just wouldn’t be any fun.
The show is much more disappointing than bad but that’s still covering quite a bit of ground. The biggest show of the year shouldn’t feel like a never ending night of boredom with matches seemingly ending with a main goal of making the audience wonder what the WWE is thinking. That was the case with Styles vs. Jericho (which I’ve lightened up on) and New Day vs. League of Nations, which really isn’t how things should be going. It’s not a good show and that’s much more due to being boring than bad, which is often even worse.
7. Survivor Series
This is another case of the main event being all that people are going to remember and in this situation, I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not. I’ve thought about Goldberg vs. Lesnar a lot now and I’m really not sure what it really means. I don’t know if I should be mad about it or not but I know it made an impact. Unfortunately, when the main thing people remember about your show is a match lasting ninety seconds, there’s a lot left to be desired.
The other problem is how unbalanced this show really felt. You had the men’s Survivor Series match lasting nearly an hour while the tag team and women’s versions felt like they were rushed out there because we needed to fill in time elsewhere. The big match is still good but it took up so much time from everything else and that’s not a good thing.
Overall, this show is all over the place and unfortunately that doesn’t pan out all that well. It’s definitely one of the weaker shows of the year and when your show is approaching five hours counting the pre-show (those thinks are way too pesky) with ninety seconds basically defining the entire thing, there’s almost no way for it to really work. The show is a pretty big mess with an infamous main event which overshadows all the good, leaving it pretty low on the WWE charts.
8. Bound For Glory
It just wouldn’t be right if I didn’t put a TNA show on here and while it’s still a stretch to call anything TNA does major, this is about as good as it’s going to get. The problem here isn’t so much that anything is bad but much more along the lines of it’s just kind of there. You know, much like almost everything else TNA does.
As is far too often the case in TNA, Bound For Glory just kind of came and went without anything of note going on. I had to look back at the review to remember anything about it, including the main event. That’s a really bad sign for TNA when the show was just a few months ago. The Great War was good enough and a big spectacle but that doesn’t mean the match was, you know, good.
I’m really not sure what else there is to say about this show. Like, what else even happened here? The World Title didn’t change hands in a mostly Impact level main event. The X-Division Title match was good but, again, really nothing worst checking out. Like I said, for the biggest show of the year, that’s really not a good sign.
It’s not a good sign that I had to keep dropping nominees from the list because they really weren’t all that bad. Really, there are only a few options to really pick from here and there’s only one major option: “Wrestlemania XXXII”. The show is a glorified disaster with barely any standout matches and a horrible aftertaste in many of the fans’ mouths. When fans are leaving the show early to watch the ending of the show on the WWE Network, it’s clear that you’re doing something very wrong.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
NorCal and I are back (hopefully once a week now) to talk about the Brand Split thus far, along with the rollout of the Cruiserweight division. All this plus a lot more.
Also, we’re looking for questions to answer on air. If there’s something you’d like to hear us talk about or a topic you’d like to hear us cover, let me know in the comments and there’s a good chance it’ll be addressed on air next week.
Backlash 2002 (2016 Redo): Feel The Sleeping Power Of Hulkamania!
Backlash 2002 Date: April 21, 2002
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Attendance: 12,489
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler
It’s the first pay per view after the Brand Split and it really is a tale of two shows at this point. Raw is absolutely horrendous at the moment with an unmotivated Undertaker vs. Steve Austin as the main feud (and the Raw main event here) for the next WWF World Title match. That would be your Smackdown main event here as HHH is defending against Hulk Hogan for reasons of pure nostalgia. Let’s get to it.
The opening video is all about HHH vs. Hogan with Hulk talking about how he needs the title one more time to validate his career after being away for so long. HHH says that was then and this is now, meaning it’s no longer Hogan’s time.
Cruiserweight Title: Kidman vs. Tajiri
Kidman is defending after taking the title from Tajiri a few weeks back. Tajiri also has Torrie in the geisha outfit. Standard cruiserweight style to start with an exchange of armdrags as Lawler complains about Torrie being covered up. Tajiri goes with the kicks and choking to take over, including the required chinlock. A baseball slide dropkick in the Tree of Woe makes it even worse and Tajiri starts in on the back. That means the Tarantula goes on but Tajiri can’t hit the Buzzsaw Kick.
Instead he gets two off a bridging German suplex as the crowd is already dying. A big kick to the head gets two on the champ but for some reason Tajiri tries a powerbomb. The shooting star misses and Tajiri’s Buzzsaw gets two. That actually earns a KIDMAN chant as the fans can get behind someone who keeps fighting through adversity. Tajiri loads up something off the top but gets pulled down with a sitout powerbomb. Kidman tries a powerbomb of his own but KIDMAN CAN’T POWERBOMB YOU as Tajiri mists him in the eyes for the pin and the title.
Rating: C. The back and forth action was fine but there wasn’t much heart to this one. The fans got behind Kidman for all of ten seconds before Tajiri misted him to take the title back. It’s not a bad choice for an opener but this felt like something out of WCW: give them a little time and have the fans forget about it so the real stars can take over. It’s no wonder Kidman did that “no one knows who I am” promo on Smackdown.
The APA have a very quick reunion.
Scott Hall vs. Bradshaw
Remember a month ago when Hall was fighting Austin at Wrestlemania? The NWO (as in X-Pac) is at ringside so here’s Faarooq to have Bradshaw’s back. Bradshaw punches Scott in the jaw to start and a DDT sends him outside. That means a beating from Faarooq, followed by something like a right hand to X-Pac who can barely sell that properly. Back in and Hall does his discus punch with almost no pop behind it.
An APA chant doesn’t do much for Bradshaw but he gets in a shoulder to put both guys down. We get the Bowling Shoe line from JR as Hall is stumbling around, leaving Bradshaw of all people to carry this mess. The Clothesline knocks Hall’s head off but X-Pac puts the foot on the ropes. Faarooq takes care of X-Pac, leaving Hall to hit a horrible low blow to set up a rollup for the pin.
Rating: D-. I can’t believe I’m saying this but I’m feeling very sorry for Bradshaw around this time. The guy is stuck taking care of the veteran star and Hall has no business being on a major show at this point. It’s very clear he doesn’t care and is just out there for a paycheck and that leaves Bradshaw in over his head (not his fault) against someone who can’t help him through the match. The result is a disaster, save for the fans being VERY excited for an APA reunion. You know, less than a month after their split.
Vince laughs at Flair for screwing up Raw so far but Ric says he’ll never be like Vince at the helm of the show. Hands are NOT shaken and this goes nowhere.
Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz
Trish is challenging and I keep forgetting how great she looked around this time. Actually hang on a second as here’s Molly Holly instead of Jazz. Molly says the Women’s Champion shouldn’t have to flaunt her body and hits Trish in the face with the mic. A whip sends Trish into the steps and here’s Jazz to get things going.
Trish is ready to go and drops Jazz throat first across the top rope. Jazz starts punching and we get some Mike Tyson comparisons. The Stratusphere puts Jazz down again but since that’s just a glorified hurricanrana, a sitout powerbomb gets two on Trish. The Stratusfaction is broken up (because it’s a bulldog) and a dragon screw legwhip sets up an STF to retain Jazz’s title.
Rating: D+. Time hurt them here but the story before the match really didn’t help. Yeah Molly did some damage but Trish tried her signature move and Jazz did the leg damage that set up the STF. Jazz really doesn’t serve much of a purpose here other than being a dragon for Trish to slay at some point in the future and that’s really not interesting. It was better than the previous match though so things are looking up.
We recap Jeff Hardy vs. Brock Lesnar, which is mainly over Paul Heyman stealing Lita’s underwear on Raw.
Heyman gives Lesnar an unnecessary pep talk.
Jeff Hardy vs. Brock Lesnar
Lita is in Jeff’s corner and this is Brock’s in ring debut. Jeff goes after him to start and is thrown outside like a fly. A high crossbody gives Jeff two and it’s time for the beating to begin. We go to the yet to be built Suplex City before some backbreakers make it even worse for Jeff.
A pair of Irish whips have Jeff reeling but he comes back with a Whisper in the Wind to put Brock down. JR calls that a rare occasion, which is technical true due to Brock having about three minutes of ring time in the WWF at this point. The Swanton only gets two and that’s about it for Jeff. Hardy gets a chair so Brock scoops him up for an F5 onto the steel. Heyman: “DON’T PIN HIM! HURT HIM!” Lesnar gives him three straight powerbombs and the referee stops it.
Rating: D+. That’s all Lesnar needed to do here though you could argue it should have been against Matt and Jeff at the same time. Heyman telling Lesnar to hurt him was the perfect line and Brock looks like an unstoppable monster. On top of it all though is Jeff’s selling as he makes you think he’s been shot every time he takes another big shot.
We recap Kurt Angle vs. Edge in a rematch after Edge beat Angle in their first match. That’s not cool with Kurt so it’s time for revenge. This is a way for Edge to look great and move up the ladder and almost no one can help him better than Angle.
Kurt Angle vs. Edge
I love those big pieces of metal that swing back and forth to go with the Backlash name. You don’t see that kind of stuff enough anymore. Angle makes the mistake of charging at Edge to start and runs into some right hands. A flapjack sends Kurt outside and he’s rather upset by these circumstances.
Back in and a wicked German suplex sends Edge flying and an overhead belly to belly gets two. It’s already off to the chinlock and things slow down a bit. Edge fights back again and gets in a belly to belly of his own to buy a breather. The yet to be named Edgecution gets two on Angle but Edge takes too long on top, allowing Angle to run the corner for the superplex. That always looks great.
Some rolling Germans give Angle more near falls but Edge gets in something like a release German suplex of his own. A backdrop puts Angle on the floor again (Why is that floor so shiny?) and Edge dives down onto him for a lighter pop than I was expecting. Back in and an Angle Slam sets up a quick ankle lock but Edge rolls through for a near fall. Angle brings in a chair (Why does the referee never even try to stop that?) but walks into an Edge-o-Matic. The spear is blocked by a knee to the face and the Angle Slam gives Kurt the clean pin.
Rating: B. I know he’s run a lot of his legacy into the ground but dang Angle was good back in the day. It’s crazy to think that he had only been in the WWF about two and a half years at this point because he’s been great for so long. Edge is getting a heck of a rub out of this feud and it’s doing a lot to make him into a bigger deal. That’s such an important key to his career: they didn’t go nuts and hot shot Edge because they knew he was going to be something special. Let him season in this role and then move him up when he’s ready.
Here’s Chris Jericho who doesn’t have a match tonight. Just thirty days ago he was the WWF Champion but now he doesn’t have a match. Billy Kidman, Trish Stratus and MAVEN can get matches but he’s left off the show? JR: “What a bitter young man.” Actually what a person with a point. It’s ok though because Jericho knows he’s better than Hulk Hogan. Since he doesn’t have a match tonight, he’s out of here. Standard “hey I’m here and I’ll be back” segment.
Undertaker comes in to see Flair (and Arn Anderson) but just stares at him.
Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Eddie Guerrero
Eddie is challenging after returning recently and this is a battle of the frog splashes. Van Dam tries the kicks but gets taken down by the leg in a smart move. Rob’s shoulders in the corner don’t do much good either so he kicks Eddie down for two. It’s way too early for a splash though as Eddie crotches him down. Eddie can’t get a superplex though and Van Dam drapes him throat first across the top rope to really take over.
They head outside with Van Dam moonsaulting off the apron to set up the spinning kick to the back. Rolling Thunder is blocked, probably because it involves so much time and noise. A surfboard with Eddie bending Van Dam back into a dragon sleeper makes things even worse for the champ. That’s playing to Rob’s natural assets as most people can’t bend that way.
The Gory Stretch is countered into a sunset flip but Eddie stomps him down all over again. Eddie takes too long setting up his own frog splash so he sunset bombs Van Dam off the top for two instead. The near fall makes Eddie bring in the title and a neckbreaker onto the belt sets up the frog splash to give us a new champion.
Rating: B-. Oh yeah Eddie is back and that’s a great thing. Eddie looked awesome here and was obviously way ahead of Van Dam in the ring which had to be expected. Van Dam is always one of those guys who was there to drop the title to a better option as champion and that’s a role he played as well as anyone else. Good match here and most of that is due to Guerrero.
We recap Austin vs. Undertaker which is somehow mostly about Ric Flair. Undertaker beat Flair up at Wrestlemania so Undertaker wanted to make him miserable. Austin doesn’t like authority figures in general so Flair has made himself guest referee for this #1 contenders match.
Steve Austin vs. Undertaker
Flair is guest referee and has on red shoes that probably cost more than Nikita Koloff’s house. They start with technical stuff which means this is probably going to have a lot of time for reasons I don’t want to comprehend. A shoulder puts Austin on the floor for an early breather before doing that weird checking his watch thing.
We stop for some Austin push-ups (I don’t get it either.) before a clothesline drops Undertaker. An armdrag (???) and drop toehold (?!?) put Undertaker down into a Fujiwara armbar as we flash back to 1992 for some reason. Back up and Undertaker’s big boot takes over but we slow it down with a wristlock. Old School is broken up and Undertaker is knocked outside to finally makes this the brawl people expected to see.
Austin sends him into the announcers’ table but we have to stop for a knee brace adjustment. A slugout sends Undertaker into the crowd and here’s the NWO to help validate their contracts. Undertaker takes over again and hits the apron legdrop. It’s time to work on Austin’s leg as this is just dying. A Figure One Leglock sends Austin over to the ropes but I can’t stop looking at Flair’s stupid red shoes. Really you have two guys in all black and a referee in a striped shirt, black pants, and bright red shoes. Who let him get away with that?
A chinlock keeps Austin in trouble and a belly to back suplex gets two. In case that’s too exciting for you, here’s another chinlock and a forearm rubbed across Austin’s face. The announcers keep talking about the NWO, who haven’t done anything in the six or seven minutes they’ve been out here. Austin comes back with right hands so weak he’d criticize them on the podcast when he’s being all picky about a match but the jumping clothesline puts him down again.
Undertaker takes off a turnbuckle pad but gets whipped into it, followed by a double clothesline to put both guys down AGAIN. Geez end this nonsense already and bring Van Dam and Guerrero out here for round two. Some WHAT right hands have Undertaker in trouble but the referee, as in RIC FLAIR gets bumped off a collision. The Stunner connects but Flair is down for over thirty seconds.
Undertaker gets in a low blow and the chokeslam as Flair is on his feet after a minute. A slow two count ticks Undertaker off and a snap spinebuster gets the same for Austin. The Stunner is broken up and Flair is bumped again, leaving Undertaker to crack Austin with a chair for another slow two. Austin stomps a mudhole and grabs the chair, which is kicked into his face for the pin to make Undertaker #1 contender, despite Austin’s foot being on the rope.
Rating: D. Once we got past the point where they were obviously stalling for time, this got into the regularly not great Undertaker vs. Austin match. These two just don’t work that well together and they never have. Unfortunately this was much more about Austin than either wrestler and that’s almost never a good sign. This went on for twenty seven minutes but Van Dam and Guerrero couldn’t even get twelve. That sums up so many of Raw’s problems in one match. Oh and the NWO never did a thing and really just came out to take attention away from the match.
Austin Stuns Undertaker again.
Flair is shown the footage of Austin’s boot on the ropes and swears.
Tag Team Titles: Billy and Chuck vs. Al Snow/Maven
Snow and Eyebrows Huffman are challenging. The champs jump them at the bell as JR makes gay jokes. The fight heads to the floor and Maven whips Billy into Snow to knock him off the apron. That means nothing though as the tag brings Snow in for some right hands until Chuck punches him down.
As expected, the announcers talk about Tough Enough instead of the match. That’s closer than they usually get at least. Snow gets in a drop toehold and it’s time for wacky unintentional sexually suggestive poses. Everything breaks down again and Rico kicks Chuck by mistake. Maven’s high crossbody gets two but another Rico distraction sets up the Jungle Kick to retain the titles.
Rating: D+. This was fine for what it was as they were only supposed to bridge the gap between the main events. You’re only going to get so much out of this student/teacher team and now it’s time to go somewhere else for the title shot. Unfortunately I have no idea who gets that shot as there really isn’t a division at the moment.
We recap HHH vs. Hulk Hogan which is the big finale to the Hogan nostalgia train. Vince gave Hogan the title shot for no real reason other than Hogan is popular and there’s nothing wrong with that. What has been wrong has been the horribly dull feud with HHH being serious and Hogan being Hogan. They really don’t have a reason to hate each other and the lame attempts to build up issues haven’t worked.
WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. HHH
HHH is defending and the graphic still has both belts for some reason. They do the big shoving match to start so I guess HHH is Ultimate Warrior in some weird revenge for Wrestlemania XII. Now it’s the lockup as JR keeps reminding us what a physical matchup this is. Like, did you know that HHH is really strong too?
Now it’s a fight over a top wristlock and then a headlock from Hogan. It would be nice if they approached first gear any time now. Hogan loses the bandana and presumably his strength as HHH hammers away in the corner. A backdrop and clotheslines give Hogan some offense and it’s time for brawling on the floor. HHH gets the better of it as a weak chant for the champ starts up.
A catapult sets up a rollup to give Hogan two and in the only moment of this match that I remember, Hogan uses a Diamond Cutter for two more. Of all the moves Hogan can use (and by that I mean about five), a Diamond Cutter? HHH starts in on the knee and gets booed out of the ring for it. Well to be fair would you want to start another phase of this match? As expected HHH turns into Ric Flair, who always had so much success against Hogan.
We hit a leg lock for a bit until Hogan kicks off the Figure Four. It’s right back to the knee though as the boring continues with some choking from the champ. The Figure Four goes on to make this match go on even longer in some form of torture. Like really, who was putting this show together and though “Hogan should get twenty minutes! That’s the ticket!”?
The hold is turned over and broken so we hit a sleeper as JR keeps trying to push the idea that the fans are the only thing keeping Hogan alive here. Two arm drops later, Hogan starts fighting up and gets in a belly to back suplex so he can have another rest. A running ax handle (Holy Japan!) sets up the big boot but here’s Jericho (duh) to take out the referee.
Jericho hits a loud chair shot to Hogan’s head but HHH would rather beat on Jericho instead of covering. It’s Hulk Up time and Hogan does the usual, only to miss the legdrop. There’s a Pedigree but here’s Undertaker to take out the referee. A chair to HHH’s head looks to finish but we get ANOTHER Hulk Up so Hogan can beat on Undertaker. With the big man dispatched, Hogan drops the leg to get the title back.
Rating: D-. While not as bad as some of Hogan’s WCW stuff (Mainly because of HHH. Ok all because of HHH.), this was REALLY boring as it went on probably ten minutes longer than it should have. Hogan is pure nostalgia and everyone in the company (save for him of course) knows it but for some reason we’re stuck watching him go out there for the better part of half an hour like he’s done…..maybe twice ever? Oh and well done on having HHH’s big title run last about a month. I’m so glad we spent months building that up for this kind of a reign.
A bloody HHH shakes Hogan’s hand so posing can take us out. Ignore the belt being nowhere in sight.
Overall Rating: D. There’s only so much you can do to get past the double main event. Angle vs. Edge and Van Dam vs. Guerrero are both good but they don’t combine to go as long as Austin vs. Undertaker. The rest of the show isn’t great either and there’s nothing worth going out of your way to see, save for maybe Angle vs. Edge. They really need a breath of fresh air on top and Hogan going out there and resting for more than half of an already too long match isn’t going to do it. There’s good stuff down the card but there’s no way around that double main event.
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Let’s see: college football, first weekend of the NFL, see how the Cleveland Indians manager to screw up the division lead this year. Yeah it’s kind of a bor……Backlash? That’s this weekend? Apparently it is despite feeling like it’s lacking another two or three weeks worth of building. It probably doesn’t help that we’re only three weeks removed from the marathon that was Summerslam weekend and there’s barely enough material for a pay per view.
There’s no pre-show match announced yet so let’s start with the precursor to the Tag Team Title match as the Usos are facing the Hype Bros in what you could kind of call the third semifinal match. American Alpha had advanced to the finals to face Heath Slater/Rhyno for the titles but the Usos turned heel and then did so again after the match to injure Chad Gable’s knee, leaving us with only one team for the tournament final. Therefore we’ll be seeing the two teams that lost in the semifinals fight each other with the winners going to the title match.
Save for an American Alpha run-in, I see no reason for the Usos to not win here and go on to face Slater/Rhyno. There isn’t much else to say on this one as Slater/Rhyno already beat the Hype Bros earlier this week (making it even clearer that this match is filler) so the Usos are the only real option. So yeah, the Usos go on as is the only real option here.
That leaves us with the Usos vs. Slater/Rhyno for the titles and I’m really not sure where you go here. There’s a very easy case for the Usos getting the belts to give them credibility (the announcers have made sure to mention that the Usos are the only team in the tournament to ever hold titles in WWE) and of course to set up the rematch with American Alpha, who beat them clean in less than a minute.
On the other hand I’m not sure how long they can string out the “Heath wants a job” angle until they have to give him something. Slater/Rhyno as the first champions would be just fine as American Alpha and the Usos can have a #1 contenders feud and then win the belts while the first champs do comedy. All that being said, the Usos are the logical pick here and I’ll go with them, despite it being stupid to have heels wrestle twice in one night to win a title.
We’ll stick with the title matches as it’s off to Miz defending the Intercontinental Title against Dolph Ziggler. If you’ve been reading my stuff lately, you know I’m really not a fan of this feud and that hasn’t changed. The story here works: they’ve built up Miz as a pretty good champion (if he holds the title another two weeks it’s the longest reign in five years) who is enough of a veteran that he can be a bigger player on Smackdown, especially with what they were teasing with Bryan. Ziggler needs a big win (though remember: it’s DEFENDING the title that matters, not actually winning it) and this is suddenly a big enough deal.
That brings us to the problem: it’s Dolph Ziggler vs. the Miz. These guys have fought a ton of times (four times on TV this year alone) and none of them have been exactly what you would call thrilling. The match will be fine but the buildup to it with both guys wanting to move up the ladder into serious contention should be calling for something special, not something we’ve seen several times before and said “eh not bad” much more often than not. I’ll take Miz to retain the title here but Ziggler going over really wouldn’t shock me as they’re obsessed with pushing him for reasons I really don’t buy.
We’ll get to one of the bigger matches now with Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt and again I’m worried about what they’re going to do here. Orton really, really needs a win after that debacle against Lesnar last month but Bray really needs a win…….well always because he hardly ever wins anything important.
The problem here is there’s only a limited story aside from Wyatt’s traditional “I choose to haunt you” idea which ran out of gas a long time ago. I’m sure it’s going to be entertaining but this feels like a lot of going through the motions instead of giving us something that should be good. I’ll go with Orton here but a no contest or countout/DQ ending would be the better option.
Next up is the Six Pack Challenge for the inaugural Smackdown Women’s Title and I’ll spare you the time by saying this should be Nikki Bella’s to lose. Naomi is the athletic woman who probably won’t win, Alexa Bliss and Carmella are miles away from being ready and Natalya has less charisma than even your average Canadian wrestler. That leaves Nikki and Becky Lynch as the only real options and you know full well that we need a good Bella comeback story after the neck injury that we all sat up crying over because we might never get to hear her call herself fearless again. So yeah, Nikki wins because it’s all about the Bellas.
That leaves us with the main event and as is the case with almost anything else on the card, I really don’t care. Dean Ambrose is defending the Smackdown World Title against AJ Styles and that’s about the extent of their issue. They’ve tried to force in the idea that Dean isn’t taking this seriously and AJ is the uncrowned champion after pinning Cena and…..yeah that’s about it. Aside from a rematch, I really don’t see a reason for AJ to not get the title here. He’s the best on Smackdown and can hold the title for a few months until hopefully someone switches shows to mix things up a bit and give him a fresh challenger.
So that’s Backlash and I’m lucky that I stayed awake while I wrote this up. No matter how you slice it, this show really isn’t interesting and doesn’t need to be a pay per view. The biggest thing here though is this doesn’t feel like a three hour pay per view. We haven’t seen a single brand show yet so maybe they’ll speed things up a bit.
Let’s say the main event and Orton vs. Wyatt eat up an hour combined (that’s probably a big stretch even when you include entrances). A Six Pack Challenge, two tag matches and Miz vs. Ziggler isn’t enough to fill in two hours. I’d be really surprised if this show runs three hours unless they add in some nothing matches like Baron Corbin vs. Kalisto (Is that still a thing?) or Kane squashing Breezango for reasons of general stupidity.
Length issues aside, I’m really not interested in this show and I haven’t seen many who are. Smackdown has been the better of the two shows but they’re a long way away from being able to pull off a three hour pay per view with just the stuff they have. Just let the show run a little shorter and people will be a lot happier. I don’t think the Network subscriptions are going to plummet if one of the seven bonus pay per views a year is a little shorter than average.
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On This Day: April 30, 2000 – Backlash 2000: This Is What Wrestlemania Should Have Been
Backlash 2000
Date: April 30, 2000
Location: MCI Center, Washington, DC
Attendance: 17,867
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler
It’s the final series. This feels like the last week at school when you realize that it’s over after this. This show is probably what Wrestlemania should have been. The company was on fire at this point and this might be the best show of the year for the best year of the company. The main event is Rock vs. HHH for the title with Shane as guest referee. There are also rumors of a Rattlesnake sighting. Let’s get to it.
We open with a video of Rock vs. HHH who has most of the McMahons in his corner. The idea here is McMahons/HHH vs. Rock/Austin. Austin blew up a bus or something recently.
Here’s a VERY drunk Debra to announce the first match. This is her return to the company after awhile.
Tag Titles: Edge/Christian vs. D-Generation X
This would be Road Dogg/X-Pac and the Canadians are the champions. I do miss DX’s Kings of Rock theme. I also miss Tori. Debra is GONE. Edge vs. X-Pac gets us going. Pac speeds things up and armdrags Edge down. Edge takes him down as well and hits a spinwheel kick to clear the ring. Back in Pac spits at him and tags out to Roadie. The champs hit Poetry in Motion and it’s off to Christian vs. Dogg.
The Canadian gets guillotined on the top and Pac kicks Christian’s head off. He’s sent to the floor due to a Tori distraction, resulting in him being sent into the steps. Back in Road Dogg stops a tag and the Bronco Buster keeps Christian in trouble. Some hard kicks to the back get two for Roadie. Christian comes back but gets caught in the dancing punches to a big reaction. Shaky knee gets two.
I think they’re both supposed to try a cross body but Christian looked like he just jumped into the one from Road Dogg. Pac breaks up the tag but while he’s being put out, Edge drops a swan dive on Road Dogg which gets two for Christian. Christian escapes a double something into a double reverse DDT. Everyone but Edge is down and there’s the hot tag. Pac’s rana is countered into a sitout powerbomb for two. Unprettier is broken up but Edge spears down Road Dogg. Tori gets up and Pac accidentally drills her, getting a rollup for two by Edge. X-Factor takes Edge down but Christian hits him with the bell so Edge can pin him.
Rating: C+. This was a good choice for an opener as both teams were moving well out there. That’s what you do for an opener: get the crowd fired up and make them cheer, even though the Canadians were on the verge of turning heel anyway. Good solid opener here and it was fast paced enough to fire up the fans.
Debra can barely say WWF Tag Team Champions. Pac was busted open.
Rock is here.
Light Heavyweight Title: Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Dean Malenko
Dean is champion and this is Scotty’s rematch I believe. Scotty dances with Lillian pre-match. Scotty starts off fast with some near falls. Belly to back puts Dean down and Scotty nips up into the Moonwalk. He sets for the bulldog to set up the Worm but Dean clotheslines him down instead. Dean, the heel, tries to get the buckle pad off but can’t quite get it. He rams Scotty into the buckle anyway and we head outside.
A dropkick to the knee gets two and Dean works the leg over a bit. After a quick leg lock he wraps it around the post a few times. Back to the leg lock and then a leg lace. Dean hits a knee crusher but Scotty comes back with an enziguri. That gets him nowhere so it’s back to the knee by Dean. He tries a spinning toehold but Scotty kicks him into the corner and rolls him up for two.
Malenko kicks at the knee again but then charges at Scotty, sending both of them out to the floor. Back in Dean hits a superplex to put both guys down. Dean is up first but walks into a backslide for two. Scotty bulldogs him down and it’s Worm time! That gets two so Malenko rolls him up with feet on the ropes for two. Things are speeding way up. Tiger Bomb gets two for Dean and he’s frustrated.
Scotty comes back at him again but walks into a powerslam for two. He tries to put Dean on the apron but gets guillotined down on the top rope. Malenko goes up top but Scotty pops him with a right hand. Scotty goes up for a superplex but Dean counters in mid air into a DDT. FREAKING OW MAN and Dean retains. SICK counter.
Rating: B. Malenko is awesome but unfortunately he never quite did anything of note in the WWF. The Light Heavyweight Title was almost exclusively defended on the late night weekend shows which meant that most people didn’t know the title was around or who held it. Dean would hold it until a few weeks before the next Wrestlemania. This was a really good match though and that ending is GREAT.
The McMahon-Helmsley Era (I think that’s their name at this point at least) is in the back and Patterson and Brisco swear their loyalty. Vince says it’s all hands on deck tonight.
Big Boss Man/Bull Buchanan vs. Acolytes
Brawl to start and it’s Bradshaw vs. Buchanan to get us going. A DDT puts Buchanan down and Bradshaw goes up top for a shoulder which gets two. A spear puts Bull down as does a fallaway slam. Off to Boss Man vs. Farrooq with a Boss Man Sucks chant at the same time. Farrooq suplexes him down for two and Boss Man goes to the floor. Bradshaw puts him into the steps to keep the Acolytes in control. This is a VERY fast paced match.
Bradshaw sends him to the floor again where Farrooq gets in a few shots. It’s basically been a squash up to this point. Simmons comes in legally and finally gets taken down by Boss Man. Off to Buchanan who drops an elbow and pounds Farrooq into the corner. Farrooq plays Ricky Morton which some pretty original casting.
Off to a chinlock which doesn’t last long as it’s off to Bradshaw. Everything breaks down and Bradshaw goes up. Boss Man slows him up so that Buchanan can suplex him down for two. Buchanan misses a charge and the Clothesline gets two. A nightstick shot stops Bradshaw dead and an ax kick from the top (cool!) gets the pin.
Rating: B-. What in the world was this??? Who would have ever thought these four would have had a match that was almost faster paced than DX and Edge/Christian? The ending was great too with Buchanan’s ax kick looking great, although it wound up being more like a Fameasser. Still though, good match and a HUGE surprise.
The Hardys are in the back and say they’ll fight if they have to over the Hardcore Title.
Hardcore Holly is looking forward to beating up Crash for the Hardcore Title. Crash offers a handshake and gets slapped in the head.
We go to the announce desk for a quick talk. That’s normal but for some reason a name graphic comes up that says Tim Russert. I rewound it to see if that’s what it said and it certainly did. How odd.
Hardcore Title: Crash Holly vs. Hardcore Holly vs. Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Perry Saturn vs. Tazz
Matt was defending against Jeff when Crash came in and stole the title. You can only win here by pinning Crash or Crash can win by pinning anyone. That’s a unique twist on multi-man rules. Crash runs into a cameraman during Saturn’s entrance. Saturn immediately suplexes Crash for two. Hardcore powerbombs him for the same. The idea here is pretty clear: everyone is going after Crash one at a time and then they’ll fight each other. Northern lights suplex gets two for Tazz. Remember there’s no point in anyone covering anyone but Crash.
Crash runs up the ramp and climbs the structure (it’s the cool one with the swinging hooks). He’s followed by Matt and winds up getting hung upside down by his knee. Everyone gets him down so Matt dives on all of them. The fans are impressed. Saturn does something to Matt that we miss and a piece of the structure breaks off. Jeff dives off part of it as well to take down Saturn. Matt and Crash head to the ring and Jeff joins them for some double teaming.
This is one of those matches where you can’t really keep up with what’s going on. Saturn hooks a freaky arm bending hold on Crash but Matt breaks it up. Even the announcers can barely keep up with what’s going on here. Tazz gets a clothesline and Matt covers for two. The Hardys beat up Tazz and Hardcore on the floor. Hardcore suplexes Crash out there for no cover. There are some signs being used as weapons now.
Back in the ring and Crash dropkicks Tazz down for two. There’s an extension cord in the ring now and all six guys are in as well. Tazz pops the Hardys with a sign and gets two on Crash. C rash barely has any offense at all for the most part here. Saturn suplexes Hardcore and gets two on Crash. The Hardys both have cookie sheets and they clean a few rooms. Jeff hits a Sabu style moonsault on Crash so Saturn can get two. Hardcore superplexes Crash for two. A Falcon Arrow onto a chair gets the same.
Jeff brings in a ladder (JR: “The ladder gets a pop!”) and beats up everyone in sight not named Matt with it. This has already gone on way too long. Hardcore gets thrown into the ladder while Saturn is outside on the announce table. Jeff Swantons Crash from the top of the ladder and Matt steals a two count, leading to a brotherly fight. Tazmission to Crash but Saturn clocks Tazz with a stop sign. Jeff dives on Saturn and Crash steals the pin on Tazz to retain. The Hardys music plays for some reason.
Rating: D+. You can’t say Crash didn’t earn it after a beating like that. The match went on too long though, clocking in at over 12 minutes. The problem was they ran out of stuff to do about 8 minutes in, so from about that far in until they bring in the ladder, this was a lot of laying around and doing nothing of note. It would have been better with less time.
Shane says he doesn’t have a conflict of interest tonight.
We recap Angle vs. Show. Show has “gone Hollywood” resulting in some funny imitations. HHH gave Angle and Show a tag title shot but Angle didn’t like Show being a fat Scottish guy so Angle jumped him. This went badly, setting up the following match.
Kurt Angle vs. Big Show
Angle runs down Marian Berry, who is mayor of Washington DC. He’s also a former crackhead. The lack of integrity is what’s wrong with America. That means we need a Real American…..and that’s what we get. Here’s Big Show doing the absolute best Hulk Hogan imitation you’ll EVER see. He’s got a Showster t-shirt with the rips in the back, yellow boots, a bald skull cap with blonde hair down the sides, he does the hand to the ear, rips the shirt and throws it, and does the swinging arms warmup that Hulk did. And then, he talks.
Doing an even better Hogan imitation, he talks about being to the top of the mountain and says dude and brother more times than should be humanly allowed. Angle jumps him but Show HULKS UP almost immediately. Right hand doesn’t work (JR: “The old no sell!”) so Show punches him three times and hits the big boot. LEG DROP gets two and a bigger reaction than anything else so far, which is saying a lot as the fans were going nuts the entire time so far.
Angle goes for the leg and the fans chant for Hogan. Show (who has his goatee dyed too) rips off the cap and hair and destroys Angle in the corner. Chokeslam ends this quick. It’s too short to rate but as a match it was worthless. From an entertainment perspective, this is one of the best and funniest moments you’ll ever see. Check this out as it’s well worth it if you’re a Hogan fan.
We recap T&A vs. the Dudleys. The Dudleys are the hot new team and Bubba likes to put women through tables. The only one he hasn’t been able to do it to is Trish, so Trish has been making these sexy videos about tables. She keeps kissing him to keep from being put through the tables and then T&A would put him through it instead.
Trish, still the evil chick who wears skin tight tiny outfits and has more sexual innuendo than Lawler could ever dream of, says Bubba will see how she feels in a minute.
Bubba is in another of his trances.
T&A vs. Dudley Boys
Brawl to start of course and Bubba chases Trish around on the floor. Albert and D-Von get us going with the future Japanese bore taking control. D-Von takes him down for two and I have no idea who the faces are and who the heels are here. Off to Bubba who takes his head off with a clothesline. That and an elbow drop both get two. Off to D-Von and the Dudleys hit a double suplex and the yet to be named What’s Up.
Albert comes back with a bicycle kick and it’s off to Test. Double splashes in the corner get two on D-Von. I could listen to Bubba Dudley yell from an apron all day. I’d get pretty bored but I certainly could do it. The big evil (I think?) ones double team D-Von. Albert slams Test onto D-Von and shouts to TESTIFY TO THAT. Bubba: “SHUT UP!” The fans of course want tables but D-Von gets a neckbreaker on Test instead.
The referee misses the tag to Bubba and the beating continues. Albert hits his slingshot into the bottom rope for two. A sunset flip out of nowhere gets two for D-Von, but he’s quickly powerbombed for the same. The fans want tables and Trish isn’t sure what to think. Albert goes up but Bubba distracts him, allowing D-Von to hit a superplex and make the hot tag.
Reverse 3D (called the 3D by JR of course) gets two. Baldo Bomb kills Bubba but D-Von pulls him away from the big elbow. The Dudleys load up the REAL 3D (as in Bubba gets a running start) but Trish offers a distraction by taking her jacket off and shaking her hips. Keep in mind that this is before Trish let herself go in 2001/2002, and yes I said that right That lets Test kick Bubba’s head off for the pin.
Rating: D+. Anything with Trish in hot pink shorts and shaking her hips is never a bad thing. The match however was pretty bad, but the whole point was the post match stuff. Also the Dudleys were more or less turned face in this match due to the fans loving hot women being put through tables for some reason.
Post match Bubba hits the Cutter (called a neckbreaker by JR who is way off tonight) on Test and grabs Trish. She French kisses him but gets powerbombed through the table anyway. The orgasmic look on Bubba’s face is always great. Trish is taken out on a stretcher.
Chyna and Eddie arrive. Eddie is told he has a match next. They’re just arriving from the prom as Eddie has earned his GED if I remember correctly.
As Eddie is changing in the aisle, we get a quick recap of him hooking up with Chyna. Essa was Eddie’s partner one night and Lita accidentally moonsaulted Eddie. Chyna threatened her and Lita hit Eddie again. This is before Lita meant anything.
European Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Essa Rios
Rios has Lita with him. Eddie immediately dropkicks him down but Rios speeds things up to take over. A Saito suplex stops that completely and Eddie works on the arm. Rios tries to run the corner out of a wristlock but slips off the ropes and has to drop it. Instead an armdrag sends Eddie to the floor but Rios’ dive misses. Slingshot hilo hits Essa and Eddie is in full control. Apparently Trish has been taken to the hospital.
Rios is sent to the floor where Chyna drills him with a forearm. Rios comes back with a missile dropkick for two. The fans don’t really seem to care here. Things speed up and Eddie gets launched into the ropes by Rios’ feet. Eddie sends him to the floor with ease and Chyna fires off another big forearm. Eddie dives on him and you can hear the Spanish announce team talking.
Guerrero loads up a powerbomb on the floor so Lita goes up top for the save. Chyna shoves her off and Lita crashes into the table. Rios runs in and hits a HUGE moonsault off the top to send Eddie into the table. Back in the ring a missile dropkick puts Eddie down and to the floor where Essa hits a HUGE over the corner dive. Back in Eddie hits a superplex and a brainbuster, but Rios armdrags him off the top. The big moonsault (gorgeous one too) hits Eddie’s knees and a Gory Bomb into an airplane spin into a neckbreaker gets the pin to retain.
Rating: B. This started slow but once they started busting out the lucha stuff, this got very good very fast. Rios is a guy that never quite clicked in the WWF but his chick certainly did. Lita would hook up with the Hardys the next month and become as famous as she ever did in her career. Very fun match here.
Post match Lita rips off Chyna’s dress, revealing some very nice and very small blue underwear. This was when Chyna was still hot.
HHH is still in street clothes and says he has nothing to worry about. Vince is smug about Austin not being here yet.
Benoit says Jericho may say he’s great but Benoit is the champion.
We get the second schoolgirl video of the night. It says Judgment Day is coming. That’s Undertaker.
Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit
Does this need a backstory at all? Benoit is champion and I think that’s all you need to know. Jericho is a face here…..I think? The fans chant for him so we’ll say he is. They jockey for position on the ropes and tumble out to the floor. Back into the ring and they hit a series of rollups I can’t keep up with. They trade skin ripping chops before Jericho gets on top of him with right hands. Benoit gets up and tries some Germans but Jericho grabs the top rope.
Instead Benoit throws him over the top and out to the floor. Suicide dive misses and Benoit crashes ONTO HIS HEAD on the floor. That’s a much scarier move knowing what we know now. Benoit gets back up and sends Jericho into the steps but he jumps over them to avoid contact. Benoit is cool with that and dropkicks them into Jericho’s knees to take over. Back inside Benoit gets two off a gutbuster.
The champ drapes Jericho over the top rope and hooks an abdominal stretch. Jericho comes out of it and hits the Lionsault but he can’t cover because of the ribs and a possible arm injury. Eventually it gets two and they get back up. Benoit gets his boot up in the corner but Jericho kicks his head off with a spinwheel kick. Jericho cradles him for two and then drapes him over the top just like Benoit did earlier. The challenger tries his springboard dropkick but Benoit avoids the contact.
Benoit goes up but gets crotched with his back to the ring. Jericho tries a belly to back superplex but Benoit spins around in the air and lands on Jericho for a delayed two. Awesome match so far. Jericho hits his double powerbomb for two but Benoit counters the cover into the Crossface. That gets broken up by a rope so Jericho tries the Walls but he can’t quite hook it before Benoit makes the rope.
They head into the ropes and Jericho accidentally forearms the referee. Benoit grabs the belt to blast Jericho in the face and tick off all the fans. That only gets two and the kickout gets an eruption. Benoit snap suplexes him onto the belt and goes up top for the Swan Dive. Jericho moves and Benoit hits the belt which was under Jericho……AND THAT’S A DQ??? Oh freaking blow me! JR flat out says that decision sucks.
Rating: A-. Seriously, WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA? This was getting AWESOME and was probably on the way to being the best non-ladder match I can ever remember with these two, but then we didn’t get to see the ending. At least the replay shows that Jericho picked up the belt because it looked like he just moves and Benoit hit it. That being said, Benoit vs. Jericho with 15 minutes is more than worth watching.
Jericho puts the referee in the Walls post match. Good.
We recap HHH vs. Rock. Vince turned on Rock to help HHH retain at Wrestlemania and said that Rock would never be champion again. Rock beat Boss Man and Buchanan in a cage to get a rematch but was beaten down after the match ended. Vince stacked the deck so Linda said Austin would be in Rock’s corner. He hadn’t been seen since November so this was a big deal. Austin blew up DX’s bus to end Smackdown.
Rock says if Austin isn’t here, he’ll win the title anyway.
WWF Title: The Rock vs. Triple H
HHH is champion, Vince is in his corner, Shane is guest referee, Stephanie is HOT in a little dark blue dress. Vince points out the card subject to change line in the program, which means that Austin isn’t here. Slugout to start and Rock knocks him down after a delay into the spit punch. Rock stomps him down in the corner but Shane drags him off. Brahma Bull charges at HHH but gets sent to the floor.
HHH sends him into the steps and then the announce table. Vince posts Rock and throws him back in as the odds are stacked very high already. That only gets two, as do the suplex and knee drop. HHH hooks on a long chinlock and puts his feet on the top rope. Shane has been leaving his eyes elsewhere of course. Rock finally gets up and drops HHH onto the buckle to escape. He fires off right hands and they clothesline each other.
Rock knocks him into the corner but Vince pops up with a belt shot to put him down for a very close two. Rock gets up and throws HHH to the floor where he may have hurt his arm. Back in the ring Rock hits a spinning DDT but Shane won’t count. Rock goes after Shane and they head to the floor where HHH gets in a shot to take over. Pedigree through the table is countered by a low blow but Shane doesn’t DQ him for some reason. Instead he gets up on the table too and it’s a DOUBLE ROCK BOTTOM through the table.
Both guys are half dead but Rock gets up first. There’s no referee, but it doesn’t really matter as Shane wouldn’t count a pin anyway. Vince gets in the ring with the guys and hits Rock in the back. That goes badly as you would expect because HHH gets back up and hits a Pedigree. Here are Patterson and Brisco to count but Rock kicks out. The Stooges pound on Rock and HHH gets in some shots too. His arm is clearly hurt.
Vince hits Rock in the head with a chair so hard that he falls down too. CUE GLASS SHATTER! Austin, to a MASSIVE pop, comes out with a chair and murders everyone in sight. Everyone is down so Austin leaves as Linda and the recently fired Earl Hebner come out. Stephanie gets shoved down and it’s a spinebuster and the People’s Elbow to give Rock the title back.
Rating: B+. Why this didn’t happen at Wrestlemania I’m not sure. Either way, it happened here and it was GREAT. This was the Attitude Era formula of throw EVERYTHING out there but give the fans what they want in the end. That makes the wild brawling ok and it gives Rock the title back, which is how it should be. Austin’s pop was incredible and thankfully for Rock’s time on top, Austin wouldn’t be back to action for about six more months.
Rock celebrates but here’s Austin in his truck. He’s hauling the remnants of the DX Express behind him. Austin and Rock drink beer to end the show.
Overall Rating: A. This was an EXCELLENT show with everything hitting on all cylinders. The worst match was certainly fine and the main event was great. You couple that with a hilarious moment in the Showster and a great main event that needed to happen and this could be nothing but great. Rock and HHH would trade the title some more over the summer and it was always awesome. Great show and well worth seeing.
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