Monday Night Raw
Date: April 7, 2014
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

I figured I’d throw this one in as a bonus, plus I kind of wanted to watch this show again. This is of course the big fallout show from Wrestlemania, which is usually a huge mix of storytelling, debuts, turns and an INSANE crowd that will take over the show. These things can be all over the place and it’s always fun to see where things go. Let’s get to it.

We open with the Daniel Bryan Monster video from last night. That’s still awesome stuff. This one includes him posing with the belts after the main event last night to really cap it off.

Here’s Daniel Bryan, because what else could have opened the show? I can forgive his magically healed shoulder here. The fans go insane of course and even JBL admits that he’s wrong. They won’t let him talk with the DANIEL BRYAN chants. “You guys never get tired do you?” He doesn’t think the fans know how hard it is to do the YES chant with two titles.

The fans try it without two titles and Bryan leads them one more time before his shoulders start hurting. Bryan talks about how the fans are united under behind one word, but the fans cut him off with a YOU DESERVE IT chant. Bryan: “I might deserve it a little bit, but I think you guys deserve it.” He thanks the fans for being behind him and it’s YES time again but here are HHH and Stephanie.

They stand on the apron because HHH doesn’t want to get in the ring and do something he’ll regret. Bryan takes the title off his waist, gets right in HHH’s face, and does the YES pose for a funny spot. HHH says this ends tonight because this is his show. Therefore, he’s booked himself into a title shot against Bryan tonight and the YES movement ends. This was the only way to start the show and Bryan vs. HHH is a fine main event, especially given that you know it’s a big angle.

A graphic of Lesnar standing over Undertaker with the caption “streak conquered” got the loudest heat of the night.

Batista comes in to yell at HHH but the boss says Batista was the one tapping. Orton comes in and says he should get the title match tonight because he has a rematch clause. HHH says he’s the COO so they get rematches at a later date because tonight he’s taking care of Bryan. That’s not cool with them so Stephanie gives them a Tag Team Title shot. HHH says historically, the three of them are unstoppable when they’re on the same page. That’s called planting a seed.

Wyatt Family vs. Sheamus/John Cena/Big E.

Oh here we go. The fans are WAY into the Wyatts but debut singing “John Cena Sucks” to the tune of his theme song. I really wish that one had caught on as it’s just glorious. The good guys charge the ring and the brawl is on with Cena eventually starting against Bray. The fans are almost universally behind Bray here as the nutty crowd is starting fast. Cena’s right hands are booed out of the building and Sheamus comes in with a slingshot shoulder.

Off to Rowan for a slugout and he just shoves a punching Sheamus out of the corner. Big E. comes in for a running shoulder to the ribs before lifting Rowan up for three straight backbreakers, finally winning some respect from the fans. “THAT WAS GOOD!” Harper comes in, accidentally knocks Rowan off the apron, and runs into a shoulder from Big E. It’s back to Cena as the fans get annoyed again but Harper slams him down.

We take a break and come back with Harper holding Cena in a headlock and earning a LET’S GO HARPER chant. Cena loads up an AA but eats a DDT for two instead. Back to Rowan as the fans start singing. Bray comes in again for some frenzied stomping but Cena hits that running clothesline to get a breather. Now the fans sing that Cena sucks but a release Rock Bottom makes them cheer Bray instead.

Cena finally throws Harper down and makes the hot tag to Sheamus to clean house. A top rope double shoulder puts the Family down and Sheamus mocks Bray’s pose. Rowan decks Sheamus with a clothesline (POP) and it’s off to Big E. vs. Wyatt. The Warrior Splash looks to set up the Big Ending but the Family comes back in to clean house, setting up a suicide dive to take out Sheamus. The spider walk (“WYATT’S GONNA KILL YOU!”) sets up Sister Abigail’s Kiss to pin Big E and end the madness.

Rating: C. The match was fine but you know this is all about the crowd. The post Wrestlemania crowd is more of an attraction than the wrestling itself a lot of the time and that’s exactly what happened here. I could have gone for Sheamus taking the pin instead of the Intercontinental Champion, but this is one of those shows where it really doesn’t matter that much.

Slam City ad.

We get a video of people doing a bunch of outdoor sports with the word impossible. It really says I’m Possible though, and you can be too, if you just BOLIEVE.

Fandango/Summer Rae vs. Santino Marella/Emma

Summer is looking especially fetching tonight. Emma was just so wasted with Santino. The guys start with a dance off but Santino quickly loads up the Cobra, meaning it’s off to the girls. Emma grabs a quick Dilemma followed by the Emma Sandwich before the Emma Lock gets a very fast submission. This was just filler.

Here are Heyman and Lesnar for the mother of all victory laps. Brock shows off his EAT SLEEP BREAK THE STREAK shirt. Heyman says it’s his privilege to represent the conqueror of the Streak. It lasted nearly a quarter of a century but Brock ended it in three seconds. The fans’ shock shows their lack of intelligence, because THEY TOLD YOU SO. Heyman reads the shirt because we’re too stupid to do it ourselves.

Brock isn’t here to put smiles o your face, but rather to shock the WWE Universe and put tears in the eyes of children. Heyman is on fire tonight. Let’s go off page a bit and shoot from the hip shall we? Five seconds after walking through the curtains at Wrestlemania, Undertaker collapsed and was taken to the hospital with Vince himself riding with him. The greatest thing Undertaker ever did was stay down after the third F5 because he would have had a broken neck and a cracked skull. Brock’s evil smile here is glorious.

Here’s what amazes Heyman: “After the match, John Bradshaw Layfield and those two other things that call themselves announcers” applauded the Undertaker, along with 80,000 other people in the Superdome (“Not Silverdome Hogan”). So why weren’t people cheering for the winner? The fans should all feel empowered because they’re all wannabes, just like the rest of that locker room. Everyone was looking down when Lesnar came through the curtain last night because Brock doesn’t respect anyone. “HE BARELY LIKES ME!”

There are a lot of people back there who say they could have fought in an octagon, but Daniel Bryan, John Cena and Undertaker never did that, because they’re all wannabes. A lot of people wanted to be the NCAA Heavyweight Champion, UFC Heavyweight Champion and WWE World Heavyweight Champion, but Rock, Hogan and Austin didn’t do it because they’re all wannabes. And now, for the line of the year. “Last night a lot of people were coming up to me and saying they could have broken the Streak. So why didn’t you?”

We get the debut of “Brock Lesnar is the 1 in 21-1” and Heyman makes sure to say it even slower for the WHAT crowd. There are Hall of Famers, there are legends, there are superstars, but those are all plural. Then there is only one Brock Lesnar. If you don’t understand why this was absolutely amazing, I don’t know what to tell you.

Adam Rose is coming. That should have opened house shows for years but why not just turn him heel and completely miss the point of the character? Or we could have a bunny upstage him.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Randy Orton/Batista

Usos are defending of course. Jimmy slugs away at Batista to start but gets powered into the corner. The fans of course reminds Dave that he tapped out. Jey tags himself in to punch Orton in the face as the fans want Y2J and then CM Punk. Jey gets beaten down in the corner and both champions are sent outside. The fans switch to JBL as Orton DDT’s Jey off the barricade for the double countout. I’m really glad they didn’t change the belts here because it would have been such a stupid move.

A SICK powerbomb onto the steps crushes Jimmy.

Rob Van Dam vs. Damien Sandow

This is Van Dam’s latest return and you know he’s getting a great reaction. Sandow is quickly sent to the floor but he pulls Rob’s leg out and drives some knees into the chest. The Wind-Up elbow connects and YOU’RE WELCOME for that. It’s amazing how completely different Sandow has become in just a year. Some kicks put Sandow on the floor and the spinning kick from the apron knocks him silly. Back in and Rolling Thunder sets up the Five Star for the pin. Just a “welcome back” match.

Rey Mysterio vs. Bad News Barrett

This is Barrett’s return as well and I believe his first match as Bad News. The fans are entirely behind Barrett and did you really expect anything else? Rey hammers away during the catchphrase and becomes the littlest heel on the roster. He quickly sends Barrett to the floor for a sliding splash but takes a hard kick to the ribs back inside. Barrett pounds away at the back and gets two off Winds of Change. He hits a running knee to the ribs, only to have his superplex broken up. A top rope seated senton gets two for Rey and the 619 connects, but he gets crotched on top and Bull Hammered for the pin.

Rating: D+. Another nothing match here but the wrestling isn’t the point on a show like this. It’s good to see Barrett back from his nine millionth injury and Mysterio is expendable for something like this. Unless I’m mistaken, this was Mysterio’s last match with the company before he finally got to go back to Mexico.

Video on Rusev, who debuts next.

Alexander Rusev vs. Zack Ryder

Rusev quickly takes him into the corner before holding him against the ropes for the knees to the ribs. The jumping superkick and a spinning slam sets up the Accolade for the first win of many.

Hall of Fame video.

Here’s Ultimate Warrior for the first time on Raw in about eighteen years. He puts on a Warrior coat and shakes the ropes, making his face very red in the process. Warrior hasn’t been sure what to say, so he puts on a Warrior mask and lets his other persona (or whatever it is) take over. He talks about how every man’s heart will beat its final beat and if the work he has done in his life means something, his story will never die. There are people in the back with his spirit and it will run forever. This is one of the most disturbing things you’ll ever hear given what happened tomorrow, as it’s a good farewell speech.

We get the very cool “Thank You Fans” video. I didn’t know what that was at first but it made me smile at the end.

Here are AJ and Tamina so the former can brag about being Divas Champion for 295 days now. She gave all of them a chance to prove her wrong and every single one of them has failed. She’s the hero of this story and the savior of the Divas division. Scratch that. She IS the Divas division, but here’s the debuting Paige to disagree. Paige is here to do what no one else would: congratulate AJ on her accomplishments. AJ tells her to go back to NXT and offers Paige a beating to send her there. Paige isn’t ready but AJ slaps her in the face and says let’s make it a title match. The fans are happy because they all know what’s coming.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Paige

The champ jumps her to start and drops Paige with a running elbow. The Black Widow goes on but Paige powers out, hits a horrible looking Paige Turner and wins the title in a shock. Well as much of a shock as it can be given how obvious it was.

Bolieve!

Here’s Hulk Hogan to present the Andre battle royal trophy to Cesaro. Sign in the crowd: “Hogan’s Cue Card: SMOOTHIE KING CENTER!” He gets the building right and says his favorite Wrestlemania moment last night was the battle royal. The fans cut him off with a CESARO chant and Hogan talks about how cool it was to see Big Show lifted into the air and slammed out because Andre himself was watching from Heaven. He brings out the thirty first man in the battle royal who just happened to be the winner.

Cesaro comes out with Zeb Colter in toe. To my great shock, Hogan shakes Cesaro’s hand, says congratulations and walks out. Zeb takes the mic and says he’ll handle it from here because he’s a real American. He talks about making Cesaro an American and a Zeb Colter guy, but Cesaro says that’s not quite true, because he’s a Paul Heyman Guy. Heyman comes out and says he’s the advocate for the King of Swing, sending Zeb into a frenzy. Heyman goes outside to tell the announcers how to talk about his new guy, allowing Swagger to come in and deck Cesaro and break the trophy (SHOCK AND AWE!).

Jack Swagger vs. Cesaro

Joined in progress after a break with Cesaro getting two off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. They head outside with Cesaro staying in control and Heyman holding the broken trophy. Back in and Jack runs the ropes for the belly to belly throw. Knees to the ribs set up a WE THE PEOPLE shout before Jack cranks on both arms. A powerslam gets two but Cesaro raises his boots to stop the Vader Bomb. Cesaro comes back with the apron superplex and some running European uppercuts, but Swagger bails to the floor for the Swing and it’s a countout.

Rating: D+. Cesaro’s year is one of the biggest disappointments since last year as he should have been launched to the main event but he wound up doing nothing for the better part of a year. It’s nice to see him getting a push now, even though he’s cooled WAY off in the last year. Seeing him with a title makes me smile though as he certainly earned it.

We recap the opening sequence that set up the main event.

Stephanie tells Shield and Kane to cool it because what happened last night doesn’t matter. All that matters tonight is HHH winning the World Title match but Shield asks Kane where the Outlaws have gone. That’s too much for Kane who says HHH thinks the Shield are expendable pawns and lets it slip that HHH told him to beat Shield down a few weeks ago on Smackdown. Stephanie calls this an injustice and instantly has Shield’s attention. Oh this is going to be good.

WWE World Title: Daniel Bryan vs. HHH

There’s no HHH just yet though as Batista and Orton come to the ring. Both guys lay out Bryan with their respective finishers and here’s Kane to add a chokeslam. The fans are already chanting HOUNDS OF JUSTICE but they get Batista mocking the YES chant. Instead the fans chant for 3MB of all people but instead here’s HHH to start the match. HHH demands that the bell ring but, just like any villain, takes his sweet time doing anything, allowing the Shield to come out. The match is done at this point so we’ll get to what everyone wants to see.

Kane, Orton and Batista get on the apron and Shield stands on the floor looking at them. HHH looks scared to death in the ring as Bryan is still down in the corner. Now Shield gets on the apron but HHH says this isn’t happening. This isn’t breaking down into a war. The fans think this is awesome and all six get in the ring.

Kane is ready to fight but HHH sends him back to the ropes, only to turn around for a spear from Reigns. The fight is on and Ambrose and Rollins hit a great looking double dive to take down Batista and Orton. A Superman Punch puts Kane down and HHH is surrounded. Bryan gets back up for the running knee and the Authority runs to fight another day to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. The wrestling sucked and if you think that’s the point of the show, you don’t understand how this Raw thing works. This was a great show as it moved so many things forward, debuted new wrestlers, gave us some major plot advancements and felt important for the first time in a very long time. In other words, this show actually did stuff and had some fun instead of beating everything into our heads all night long. It’s one of the best post Wrestlemania shows of all time, which says a lot as this might be the second most important night of the year.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/04/09/monday-night-raw-april-7-2014-playing-to-the-crowd/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1998 Pay Per View reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: March 16, 2015
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T., John Bradshaw Layfield

There are just two weeks to go before Wrestlemania and the big question tonight is what happens between Randy Orton and Seth Rollins. Last week Orton officially snapped and destroyed Rollins to end the show, meaning it’s time for Rollins to retaliate. Other than that, we’re fully in the build mode to Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

We open with clips of Orton’s sitdown interview with Michael Cole from Smackdown where he explained his actions last week. Tonight he plans on challenging Rollins for Wrestlemania. Maybe after that he can challenge the writers to put together a story that isn’t full of holes.

The Authority is in the ring and Seth doesn’t look pleased. We’re in Iowa so he’s a hero this week. Rollins says last week was a betrayal at the hands of Randy Orton. This is nothing like what he did to the Shield because that was a sound business decision. Orton conned his way back into the Authority and made fools out of everyone, including HHH and Stephanie. Oh dang he’s done then. Seth yells at Big Show for welcoming Orton back but Show says Orton was cruel last week. He can crush Orton because he’s a giant. Thank goodness they’re just spelling it out now.

Kane promises to hurt Orton too. Noble: “Seth, I know I’m considered the secret weapon of the Authority.” Rollins’ reaction is great as his eyes shift back and forth. Noble and Mercury want to get rid of Orton too and Rollins says Orton has never dealt with anyone like him. Seth accepts the challenge for Wrestlemania, but Orton has to face him tonight first. Cue Randy to accept the challenge and promises he has enough venom for all of the Authority. A beatdown tonight would make hurting Rollins at Wrestlemania so much sweeter. These fifteen minute speeches to set up a match kill my interest in the show. Just get on with it already.

AJ Lee vs. Nikki Bella

Non-title. The Bellas get an inset before the match. “Give Divas a chance? Give us a break.” Nikki drives shoulders into the corner to start but stops to do some push-ups. AJ grabs an armbar for a bit before taking Nikki to the apron with a headscissors. We take a break and come back with AJ getting taken down by an armbar. Nikki sends her shoulder first into the buckle as the announcers talk about Booker’s wife and the View. This has nothing to do with the match but that goes without saying when it comes to commentary.

AJ comes back with a guillotine choke but gets driven into the corner again. A high cross body gets two on the champ but she plants AJ with a facebuster for the same. Nikki sends her out to the floor but Paige stops Brie from interfering. Brie posts Paige as a result, leaving Nikki to hit her forearm, and the Rack Attack for the completely clean pin at 11:00.

Rating: C+. This was better as the girls are easily more entertaining (most of the time) when they get more time. However, this match was another example of why the Divas have a major issue with getting to where their male counterparts are: their looks. When you have Nikki Bella in skin tight shorts and Brie showing off her well toned abs and AJ and Paige both being great looking, it’s hard to base a match on its merits. That’s not a knock on the girls as the all look great. It’s just distracting to look at and takes away from what I’m supposed to be focusing on.

We look at Mark Henry yelling at Roman Reigns on Smackdown and getting laid out with a Superman Punch.

Kane and Big Show argue over who is going to deal with Orton. Rollins comes in and yells at them but Kane says the giants liked seeing Orton beat him down last week. Kane allowed him to win Money in the Bank, so he won’t be in Seth’s corner tonight. Show stares at Rollins but doesn’t say anything.

Ryback vs. Miz

Rematch from Smackdown where Ryback won. We get an inset interview where Miz says Mizdow will help him win the battle royal or else. Miz stomps away in the corner to start but Ryback takes him to the floor and tells Mizdow to hit his boss, only to have Miz fight out and yell at Mizdow. Back in and the spinebuster sets up the Meat Hook and Shell Shock to give Ryback the pin at 1:57.

Mizdow helps Miz up post match but eats the Skull Crushing Finale.

Video on Cena choking Rusev out last week to earn another US Title match.

Sheamus return video. I’m assuming he’s back at Wrestlemania.

It’s time for a contract signing between Cena and Rusev. Cena comes out first and soaks up the dueling chants. He calls this the most important contract he’s ever signed before because he’s up against someone who has never met a challenge he hasn’t overcome. Rusev is the champion of the United States, meaning he represents each and every one of the fans. That’s what makes the match so important.

Cena can beat Rusev up all he wants but it doesn’t matter as long as Rusev has that title. It’s disrespectful that Rusev represents a country they all call home and the fans chant USA. Cena goes all patriotic and says Wrestlemania is the revolution. Does that make him James Storm? You can only push the US so far before they rise up. Cena signs so Cole brings out Rusev, who is minus Lana but with what looks like a lawyer. Fans: “WE WANT LANA!”

The lawyer says Rusev isn’t signing and shows us a clip of Stephanie (of course) saying only Rusev can make the match. We then see Lana making the match and JBL just unloads on the lawyer for the worst Russian accent of all time. Rusev has to be allowed to read a full statement with no interference from Cena in order for the match to be made. The statement is about America being obsessed with embracing failures and there goes Cena’s hat. He mocks the Star Spangled Banner and Cena is about to erupt. Rusev signs and turns the table over before running. The Russian flag comes down for good measure.

New Day vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd

Non-title with Woods on the floor. Kidd and Cesaro’s inset interview show them doing a clapping routine ala New Day while saying fact over and over. That might be the best thing I’ve ever seen. Los Matadores come out to watch. Natalya is looking GREAT here in a full body leather suit. Big E. throws Kidd around to start before it’s off to Cesaro vs. Kofi. Cesaro quickly swings him but stops when the referee points at Kidd for some reason. Trouble in Paradise nails Kidd but Cesaro uppercuts Kofi in the back of the head for the pin at 1:52. That was a really messy ending and I’m not sure what happened.

Post match Woods gets into it with Los Matadores but eats the Neutralizer. Los Matadores beat down Cesaro and stand alto.

We look at Undertaker’s lightning striking Bray’s chair last week.

Rollins tells the Stooges he needs them there tonight. Noble says Rollins told them to get out last week and kind of stands up to Seth, earning him a slap to his face. Jamie thinks Rollins is getting full of himself and that briefcase so Rollins is about to fire him. That doesn’t happen because Jamie quits and Mercury walks off with him. I really hope those two stick around as they’re on fire at the moment.

We get a sitdown interview with Brock where he says he’s on this planet to hurt people. That may be sadistic but he enjoys it. Wrestlemania means getting to beat people up on a big stage. Undertaker had no chance of beating him and he loved seeing people shocked. As for his contract with WWE, if he stays, he’ll be WWE Champion. On the other hand, if he goes, he’ll be WWE Champion.

As a rookie, he sent Rock to Hollywood. Then he ended the Streak. Then he knocked John Cena out of the main event. If you think Brock was crazy in hunting mode, wait until you see him in defense mode. He says he’s going to censored up Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania and walks off. Bringing up the contract idea is interesting and makes me think something is up. Side note: Brock isn’t known for his talking, but he’s miles ahead of Reigns on the mic.

Big Show vs. Erick Rowan

Rowan’s entrance was after a break but I had his name typed in before we came back. How did I know? Because who else was going to be in this spot? Serious question. Who else was going to be in that spot? Rowan is Big Show’s official whipping boy and there was almost no one else that was going to lose here.

There’s no match anyway as Big Show destroys him before the bell and hits the KO, setting up a middle rope elbow.

Larry Zbyszko Hall of Fame video. They’re starting to stretch for names, though there are worse names than Larry.

Kane and a bunch of midcarders in the Andre battle royal are in the ring with Kane offering to demonstrate why he’s going to win. This brings out Mark Henry to throw his hat in. A brawl breaks out with Axel sneaking to the floor and standing next to the trophy. We wind up with Kane and Henry with Mark throwing Kane to the floor. Axel sneaks in and tries to dump Mark, only to get tossed with ease. That’s a lot better than he did last week.

Here’s Heyman with something to say. He talks about Lesnar being the most legitimately dominant champion in the history of WWE or MMA. Lesnar is a warrior and a conqueror, who is bringing a club to Wrestlemania to dominate Roman Reigns. If Lesnar destroys Reigns, are they going to just cut the feed? Are they going to refund the money? WWE is stuck with Lesnar as WWE Champion….and there goes the mic.

Heyman thinks it’s funny because Reigns is going to get destroyed and turned into the next great Samoan American’t. He keeps saying you can’t over and over again until Reigns comes out with an “I can and I will” shirt. Reigns says this is between himself and Lesnar. He isn’t coming into this expecting a fairy tale. Reigns is hoping for a fight but expects a war. All those family members of his will carry him out, but they’ll carry him out as champion.

We recap Orton, Rollins and the Stooges earlier.

Stardust/Bad News Barrett/Luke Harper vs. Daniel Bryan/Dolph Ziggler/Dean Ambrose

Truth comes out with the title hanging from his back like a backpack. Dean beats up Stardust to start before it’s quickly off to Daniel for some forearms. The surfboard makes Stardust scream and Ziggler knocks him outside as we take a break. Back with Barrett working on Ziggler in the corner and elbowing him in the jaw for two.

Off to Harper for some choking with the boot before it’s back to Barrett, who misses the running boot in the corner. Harper is smart enough to clear out Dolph’s partners but the powerbomb is countered again. Has Ziggler been training with Kidman? Everything breaks down and Harper’s big boot and Batista Bomb get two as we take another break. We come back with Ziggler countering Wasteland with a DDT.

Truth talks about being lucky like a rabbit’s foot. Is he supposed to sound like Mike Tyson? The hot tag brings in Bryan and everything breaks down. Ambrose tags himself in and beats up Stardust, only to get kicked by Harper. Dolph kicks Bryan by mistake before kicking Harper as well. Barrett Wastelands Dolph onto his partners but Barrett counters the Bull Hammer into Wasteland for the pin at 17:00.

Rating: C+. This was a long tag match that helped set up more of the drama, but at the end of the day, these matches don’t mean much when you’re going into a ladder match. At least Truth is still funny on commentary and they’ve cut out the stupid stealing the title schtick. Good match here.

Truth gets caught with the belt and Stardust runs off with it into the crowd. Ambrose takes it back but drops it at ringside, allowing Truth to pick it up again. Harper gets in his face so Truth throws it inside. Bryan and Ziggler get in a fight until Harper interferes, allowing Barrett to Bull Hammer everyone and take the belt. Truth eats a Bull Hammer for good measure.

Rollins goes in to see the Authority but Stephanie tells him to fix this himself. Seth asks when HHH is going to stop hiding from Sting but Stephanie tells him to man up.

Bray Wyatt talks about Abigail warning him about the evils of the world, including someone like Undertaker. Undertaker tried to use the urn to burn fear into his heart. Bray pours the ashes out of the urn as he talks about Undertaker’s spirit being broken last year. That opened the eyes of the world and took away the Undertaker’s destiny. No one is safe at Wrestlemania.

Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins stops on the stage to say it took Orton three weeks to make the Authority look like fools, yet it only took three hours for Rollins to make a fool out of him. Cue the full Authority so Orton wisely goes to get a chair. The ring is surrounded as the fans want Sting. That’s exactly what they get too as Sting appears and helps clean house with the bat to a BIG ovation from the crowd. The Stooges take finishers

Overall Rating: C+. They’re firmly in last minute build mode here and this show helped, but it’s WAY too late to really make this show work. At the end of the day, Wrestlemania can’t be built up like any other show and if you try to do it that way, things just aren’t going to work. Reigns is fitting in well with the “yes I can” bit, but I have little faith in WWE to stick with that all the way until Wrestlemania.

The wrestling was better this week with the Divas looking good and the long tag match working, but those matches are more than set already. That’s the problem with this point in time: everything is already set, so what is there left to do on these shows other than kill time? This was better than the previous weeks but still nothing great.

Results

Nikki Bella b. AJ Lee – Rack Attack

Ryback b. Miz – Shell Shock

Cesaro/Tyson Kidd b. New Day – Uppercut to Kingston

Dean Ambrose/Dolph Ziggler/Daniel Bryan b. Luke Harper/Bad News Barrett/Stardust – Dirty Deeds to Barrett

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown
Date: March 12, 2015
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Jerry Lawler

It should be interesting to see if this week’s show continues Smackdown’s recent focus on the Intercontinental Title. After all the weeks of World Title build on Raw, it’s nice to have something a bit different on the other show, if nothing else just to avoid the fatigue of seeing the same things over and over again. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Daniel Bryan to get things going. He thanks the fans for their kindness and says he’s been trying to ignore that Wrestlemania sign since Fast Lane. It’s become clear to him that he can’t repeat what happened last year at Wrestlemania, but when one door closes, another door opens.

A few weeks ago, he was surrounded by people fighting for the Intercontinental Championship and it got him thinking about his heroes. People like Mr. Perfect, Ricky Steamboat, Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels and Randy Savage. When they were fighting for the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania, it was more exciting than anything happening in the World Title division. Wrestlemania VIII would disagree with you Bryan.

He’s officially in the ladder match this year though and the fans are very pleased. This brings out Bad News Barrett who reminds us that he’s still the champion and will still be after Wrestlemania. Dolph Ziggler comes out to disagree but he does say Bryan is his hero. Barrett may be the champion but he can’t even hang onto the belt. How could he possibly do that with six other guys throwing him off ladders at Wrestlemania?

Cue Harper to say he wants his Wrestlemania moment. That sounds so wrong coming from someone like Harper. He should be more like old school Cactus Jack who just does stuff for the sake of violence. Dean Ambrose comes out to a very loud reaction to say every one of them should be locked up if they think they can fight without inviting him. He even knows a good place they can be held for observation if need be.

Now it’s Stardust who grabs a mic and looks under the ring for the white stallion of the Milky Way. He wants the ivory enterprise, but instead gets R-Truth with the burlap sack. Truth pulls out the belt and calls it a beaut. He thinks the title has been passed around enough so he’s going to hold it until Wrestlemania when he climbs that ladder. Barrett cuts him off but Truth calls him sizzle chest. A brawl finally breaks out and it’s Ziggler, Ambrose and Bryan left standing.

Usos/New Day vs. Tyson Kidd/Cesaro/Los Matadores

Big E. is on the floor this time and Los Matadores confirm their heel turn in an inset interview where they say they’ll do whatever it takes to have their Wrestlemania moment. Not win the titles mind you but have their moment. Kofi and Diego get things going with the masked man stomping away in the corner. Kingston dropkicks him down for two and it’s quickly off to Woods. The intelligence doesn’t seem warmed up yet as Diego drags him into the corner for the tag to Fernando.

Jimmy tags himself in, much to Woods’ annoyance. Hey dude get over it. You kind of suck in the ring. Diego offers a distraction to break up the Whisper in the Wind and Jimmy gets crotched on the top. We take a break and come back with with Diego jumping on Jimmy’s back on the ropes and putting on a chinlock. Jerry: “What do you call a matador with a rubber toe? Roberto!” Jimmy fights up and makes the hot tag to Jimmy, leaving Cesaro to yell at Los Matadores.

Jey starts cleaning house but Kofi tags himself in for a springboard cross body for two on Kidd. Some heel miscommunication sends them to the floor and the good guys bust out dives, only to have Woods land on Jey. Again, he’s not that bright. Cesaro uppercuts Kofi through the ropes and Kidd loads up the fisherman’s neckbreaker, only to have Fernando tag himself in. Diego sneaks in with a Backstabber for the pin on Kofi at 8:40.

Rating: C+. This did its job and that’s almost all you can ask for out of a match like this. I’m assuming it’s another multi-team match at Wrestlemania, just like last year, but I’m not sure this one is going to be as good. It also says something that the Usos and Los Matadores are still in the match, just like Cesaro but with a different partner. You would think something would have changed by now. Still though, good way to set things up here.

Video on Sting vs. HHH.

Recap of Rusev vs. Cena from Monday.

Miz lists off his career accomplishments and says winning the battle royal will be the latest entry on that list. Mizdow is worried that Miz can’t beat Ryback tonight so Miz tells him to stay in the back, press his pants and get him a drink that is way too complicated to type.

Miz vs. Ryback

Ryback will have none of the sunglasses being taken off so he puts Miz on the top rope. A delayed suplex brings Miz right back down but he hammers Ryback into the ropes to take over. The fans want Mizdow as Ryback blocks a running boot and plants Miz with a spinebuster. The Meat Hook and Shell Shock are good for the pin at 2:59. Ryback’s push continues to look strong.

Mizdow chuckles in the back.

Here’s Roman Reigns to respond to Paul Heyman’s comments from Raw. We get a quick clip of Heyman talking about Lesnar destroying Rock, Undertaker and Cena and promising Brock will do the same thing and worse to Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania. Reigns says Heyman thinks he knows his family but he’s just disrespecting them. Heyman thinks Reigns is three generations removed from cannibalism? Who thinks that? Reigns won’t take someone disrespecting his family and telling him he can’t when he can. He’ll win at Wrestlemania and do his family proud.

This brings out a slightly thinner Mark Henry, who thinks Reigns is either trying to be funny or he’s been hit in the head by one too many coconuts. He doesn’t like anyone talking about his heritage but Reigns needs to understand that Heyman has gotten under his skin. Mark knows who he is, and he’s been in the ring with Lesnar. Brock nearly killed him with the F5 on the floor and Mark doesn’t think Roman is ready for that.

Roman says with all due respect but Mark cuts him off and says Reigns has to earn respect around here. That’s enough for Roman as he goes to walk away but Mark spins him around and yells at Reigns for being a young buck that thinks he knows it all. That earns him a Superman Punch and a spear through the barricade.

Reigns is tired of hearing he can’t, because he can and he will. Believe that. The family heritage idea is better than nothing but it’s still not much of a connection to a guy like Reigns. However, being tired of being told he can’t do something and proving people wrong IS something people can connect to and the idea they probably should have gone for months ago.

We look back at Bray Wyatt’s speech from Monday and Undertaker lighting the chair on fire to accept the challenge.

AJ Lee/Paige vs. Summer Rae/Cameron

Paige is so excited for this match that she took off the white shirt under her jacket between the walk through the back and the entrances. The Bellas are on commentary as you would probably expect. Paige kicks Cameron in the ribs to start and it’s off to AJ in about five seconds. AJ goes after Summer on the apron and gets nailed from behind by Cameron.

With two weeks before Wrestlemania, the Bellas are bragging about the ratings for Total Divas. Summer puts AJ in a chinlock as they FINALLY start talking about the upcoming tag match. Paige gets the tag and cleans house with her set of clotheslines, setting up the PTO for the tap out from Summer at 2:25.

Paige and AJ yell at the Bellas post match. My guess is they’re saying “TALK ABOUT WRESTLING! YOU’RE WRESTLERS!”

We look back at Reigns and Henry in case we have the attention span of a goldfish.

Henry says Reigns has made a believer out of him. He doesn’t think Reigns will beat Lesnar, but now he believes Reigns can. It’s a shame this wasn’t Sexual Chocolate as the old Henry would have certainly hit on Renee in her stomach revealing top here. Very fetching indeed.

We look at a Cricket Wireless event with Dolph Ziggler. He’s bringing some kids to Smackdown to be ringside.

Low and behold, the kids are here.

This week’s sitdown interview is with Randy Orton. He looks at the footage of Rollins curb stomping him a few months back and says that night changed him. We see him returning at Fast Lane but that wasn’t the best way to get his revenge. Instead he wove his way back into the Authority to gain their trust. This is really, really not making this horrible story make more sense.

He used Reigns to get closer to Rollins and this past Monday was reverse psychology. Apparently in WWE, reverse psychology is code for REALLY STUPID STORY. Orton explained getting rid of everyone else in the Authority, even though he had almost nothing to do with getting rid of Big Show or Mercury. Basically all he did was punch Noble.

Then he walked away from the tag and had fun beating Rollins up. Orton loved every single bit of hurting Rollins this past Monday and he let all of it out. He’s ready for the Authority’s retribution and is ready to challenge Rollins for Wrestlemania. Good for you Randy. You had a stupid plan in a stupid story that makes no sense when you actually think about it, but good for you.

Daniel Bryan/Dolph Ziggler/Dean Ambrose vs. Luke Harper/Bad News Barrett/Stardust

Unfortunately no Truth on commentary here. Ambrose headlocks Barrett to start and runs him over with a running forearm. Off to Stardust vs. Ziggler with the painted one taking over in the corner. Cole talks about Stardust being like Gollum with the Intercontinental Title. To mix things up a bit, Saxton thinks Stardust is acting like Kim Kardashian. I’m going to move on to Bryan putting Stardust in the surfboard instead as it’s less painful than talking about that disturbing, hideous, nightmare inducing creature. It’s easier than talking about Gollum too.

Stardust gets out and hammers on Bryan in the corner but gets taken down by a hurricanrana. The threat of a running knee sends Stardust running to the floor and we take a break. Back with Harper Gator Rolling Bryan before it’s off to Barrett for some forearms to the in the corner. Bryan finally kicks Harper away and the hot tag brings in Ambrose to clean house. An atomic drop into a faceplant gets two on Stardust and everything breaks down.

Ambrose cleans house and dives onto Harper and Stardust for a big crash. Barrett breaks up Dirty Deeds on Stardust and Harper kicks Dean in the face as we take another break. Back again with Barrett kicking Dean in the face for two. That seems so familiar. Bad News’ chinlock doesn’t go anywhere and Stardust’s top rope superplex does just as poorly. Instead Ambrose nails a top rope dropkick and makes the tag to Ziggler.

Harper comes in as well and eats a dropkick followed by the Fameasser for two. Everything breaks down again and the good guys load up a triple dive but Harper nails Ziggler to break up a third of it. The Batista Bomb gets two on Dolph but he comes back with a Zig Zag, followed by the running knee to give Bryan the pin at 17:38.

Rating: B. Nice long tag match here to close out the show. When a show is built around talking like this one was, you almost have to give them something like this to affirm that it’s really a wrestling show. Above all though, Barrett didn’t get pinned! That’s one whole show in a row and possibly a new record for him.

Cole congratulates Bryan on the win but Ziggler jokes that Bryan stole the pin from him. Last year Bryan had luck on his side but this year Ziggler is going to be out there with him. Dean chimes in and says Dolph stole the show, just like everyone has been stealing the title lately. Maybe Dolph thinks he isn’t quite as good as Bryan and it bothers him.

Dean says the people in the locker room know the truth about Bryan: he’s, shall we say, human waste. Ambrose goes to leave and Ziggler agrees with him, leaving Bryan in the ring alone. I really, really hope they don’t turn Bryan heel but it seems to be the only thing left for him to do at this point.

Overall Rating: C. We’re definitely in the last push to Wrestlemania, which means expect several shows like this in a row: mostly talk and hype with a token long match for most of the wrestling content. Reigns sounded fine and it’s good that they’re FINALLY giving him a reason to want to fight Brock.

On the other hand, Orton sounded like a crazy man trying to explain a stupid story. Either bring him back as a full on psycho or bring him back as part of the Authority without the Fast Lane attack. What they went with makes it seem like they were just hoping people weren’t paying attention, though given how this build has been going, they might be onto something.

Results

Los Matadores/Cesaro/Tyson Kidd b. New Day/Usos – Backstabber to Kingston

Ryback b. Miz – Shell Shock

AJ Lee/Paige b. Summer Rae/Cameron – PTO to Summer

Dean Ambrose/Dolph Ziggler/Daniel Bryan b. Luke Harper/Stardust/Bad News Barrett – Running knee to Harper

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: March 9, 2015
Location: CONSOL Energy Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Booker T.

Wrestlemania is closing in on us and the card is pretty clear. That leaves just a few weeks to strengthen up the stories and make the fans want to buy the show. Right now, Reigns is still getting warm but this is the same arena the 2014 Royal Rumble was held in, meaning he might not be in for an easy night. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event with Rollins pinning Reigns, only to have Roman clean house afterwards. I still see no reason for Seth to get that pinfall.

Here’s Randy Orton to open things up with the Authority, minus the leaders, in the ring. Kane says the Authority wants to do this in public so there are no more questions. Without further ado, Kane officially welcomes Orton back to the Authority. Big Show is nearly booed out of the arena before he can say that Orton would RKO his own father to get where he wanted to go, so welcome back. Noble can’t do this and calls Orton a no good snake.

Rollins asks for some slack for the Stooges before addressing rumors that Orton isn’t part of the Authority. He’s just biding his time before he can get his hands on Rollins. That must make these people feel like idiots because he and Orton are standing side by side. Even Rollins had his own doubt and he’s sure the rest of the team did as well. “The security did, Kane did….and no one really cares what Big Show thinks.” Dang he’s nailing this voice of the fans schtick lately.

Rollins shakes Orton’s hand but Orton wants to know what’s happened to this team. They used to be ruthless but now they’re all sucking up to him. Kane is now a stupid gopher and Big Show used all his power to whine and complain. Does Noble hate him because he can’t get on all the rides at Disneyland? Ok points for a funny line. That leaves just Rollins, who is so blind that he can’t see what’s going on.

Orton has just been biding his time until Rollins feels safe and sound until he strikes. There is no future for Seth Rollins….but never mind because he’s just kidding. Rollins laughs and thinks Orton should take over for Stewart. The team poses and that’s finally it. This was about as big of a waste of time as I’ve seen this side of a HHH and Stephanie promo.

Daniel Bryan vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title and R-Truth is on commentary with a burlap bag next to him. Cole: “DY-NO-MITE!” Truth: “I haven’t heard that since reruns of Mash!” Barrett quickly takes him down for two before cranking on the arm. A butterfly suplex gets two as JBL asks R-Truth about Dikembe Mutumbo (a 7′ NBA player). Barrett gets Bryan into the ropes and kicks him in the face as we take a break. Back with Barrett getting two off a superplex as the announcers continue their completely unrelated jabbering. A crucifix gets two for Bryan but he ducks a clothesline and hits the running knee for the pin at 7:10.

Rating: C-. Twenty eight years ago at Wrestlemania III, Randy Savage and Ricky Steamboat had one of the best matches of all time for the Intercontinental Title. Now that title is held by a guy who loses to get his feud over and will likely walk out of the title match at Wrestlemania with the belt, making this whole thing a waste of time. My how times change. Even Truth’s commentary can’t save these things.

Barrett knocks out Bryan post match but Ambrose runs out to deck Barrett.

Dean Ambrose vs. Stardust

Stardust has the title itself and Truth is still on commentary. Ambrose takes him down to start with some running elbows. JBL and Truth argue over Truth stealing the Intercontinental Title a few times as Dean hits the running dropkick against the ropes. Stardust is sent to the floor for the suicide dive but he hooks a dragon screw leg whip as Dean gets back inside and we take a break. Back with Dean firing off right hands and some running forearms, followed by a bulldog. The rebound clothesline sets up Dirty Deeds to give Ambrose the pin at 7:27.

Rating: D+. Thanks for joining the feud Stardust. By losing this match, I’m sure it means you’ll be in line for a title push very soon. This story is building the title up, but it’s only after the belt is ripped apart in the first place. That’s my major issue here: they could do the same idea but without hurting the title.

Post match Dean grabs the belt but Ambrose, Bryan, Harper and Ziggler run in for a brawl. Truth slips the belt in his bag and sits back down on commentary. Everyone hits their finisher with Barrett coming out on top but he can’t find his title. Truth gives him a bag and Barrett runs into the crowd, only to find a toy Intercontinental Title. Well of course he did.

Cole starts to talk about the Hall of Fame but Booker has to explain the idea of what Truth just did. Tonight’s inductee is for Connor the Crusher, who will be receiving the first ever Warrior Award.

Here’s Paul Heyman to introduce a Roman Reigns video about his rise from NXT to the main event of Wrestlemania. He ends it by saying he can beat Lesnar, so Heyman responds by bringing out Lesnar himself. Heyman mocks Reigns’ fans for listing off all of his accomplishments, capping it off with a high pitched YAY. He’s known Reigns’ family since he was 14 years old and the truth about Reigns is his family would send Reigns to the bars and beaches to beat up football players and beach bums for target practice.

Now they’re doing the same thing with Lesnar but it doesn’t work that way. The Authority is hoping Reigns can win the title so Rollins can cash in on him, because Rollins isn’t cashing in on Lesnar. If anyone is thinking about pulling a Montreal Screwjob on Lesnar, they’re not leaving that stadium alive. Reigns is going to fight for everything he has but come up short. When Reigns is taking that kind of a beating….and there goes Heyman’s mic again.

It comes back on and says people keep cutting him off instead of coming to the ring and taking it out of his hands. Or better yet, have them come out here and take the title from Lesnar’s hands, because he might want to unify the title with the UFC World Title this summer. Maybe he’ll go to Las Vegas and knock out Manny Pacquiao and Floyd Mayweather.

The title belongs to Lesnar instead of WWE and he isn’t giving it back. Twelve years ago, WWE put Lesnar in the ring against the Rock and he beat the star of the company. Then he beat the Undertaker to break the Streak. Then he beat John Cena to a pulp. Now he’s going to beat Roman Reigns and keep that title.

Just like last week and the previous week and the previous week: I still have no reason to care about this match. Why do I want to see Lesnar lose the belt? Because he beat up Undertaker? So? It was a fair match. Why do I want to see Reigns win the title? Because he’s Rock’s cousin? So? So is Jimmy Uso. There’s no connection to the fans here and no reason to want to see this match.

Bray Wyatt says Wrestlemania is almost here and he wants the reaper to find him.

Kane/Big Show vs. Erick Rowan/Ryback

Because there was NO ONE else in the battle royal for either of these teams to fight. Ryback runs Kane over to start and drives shoulders in the corner. Kane kicks him in the face to block the Meat Hook and it’s off to Show for a spear. Ryback gets tossed around even more before it’s off to Kane, who gets supelxed to give Ryback a breather. The lukewarm tag brings in Rowan to clean house but he goes after Big Show, allowing Kane to uppercut him. Big Show punches Kane by mistake though, allowing Rowan to get the pin at 3:31.

Rating: D. It’s really hard to care about these guys when Rowan has barely done anything since turning face (or ever for that matter), Big Show and Kane are Big Show and Kane and we’ve seen some combination of these four guys in about a dozen matches this year alone. As usual, WWE comes up with a combination and keeps it going for months after people stop caring.

Big Show and Kane start arguing but SERIOUS STEPHANIE comes out to yell at them. She tells Big Show to shut up and start hurting people again. Kane needs to stop getting coffee and bring the monster back. Now get out of her ring and out of the arena because they’re not thinking about what’s best for business.

We look back at Miz’s commercial last week.

Miz pitches a partnership with Wiz Khalifa but Wiz has already signed up Mizdow. Damien comes in for a “rap” about beating Miz in the battle royal. Khalifa looks homeless and I have no idea why he’s on this show other than he’s from Pittsburgh.

Sheamus return video.

Wiz Khalifa performs and the fans don’t seem that interested. I have it muted for most of the performance as I again ask: what does this have to do with making me want to watch Wrestlemania? Mizdow came out to celebrate with him.

We recap AJ returning to save Paige from the Bellas.

The Bellas watch a clip of themselves in the Flintstones movie (they’re in it for about four minutes) and make Flintstones puns about beating up AJ and Paige at Wrestlemania.

Summer Rae vs. AJ Lee

Summer has Cameron and AJ in her corner after the three of them argued over being the Diva to get a chance. AJ gets a quick rollup for two and kicks Summer in the ribs. A sitout wheelbarrow slam gets two for Summer and she chokes in the corner, only to have AJ elbow her in the jaw. They trade kicks to the face with Summer getting two. Back up and the Black Widow makes Summer tap at 3:05.

Rating: D+. Standard Divas match here as Summer continues to be the only competent one out of the new trio she’s in. I really hope the Give Divas a Chance bit doesn’t just wind up being about the Total Divas getting a chance to show that they have no business being in a ring. Summer is fine for a stuck up heel and the tag match at Wrestlemania could be good, but they need some fresh blood that can work in the ring.

We get a video on Sting vs. HHH narrated by someone who is supposed to be Sting but doesn’t sound much like him. He talks about WCW going under and how HHH is going to be punished for only having loyalty to himself. Sting has been waiting fourteen years to beat down HHH, so it’s game over at Wrestlemania.

Rusev and Lana are coming to the ring for the match but run into Cena. Rusev says no again but Cena cuts him off and says performing at Wrestlemania is a privilege. If he hasn’t earned that privilege this year then so be it, but Rusev needs to understand that he hasn’t earned the right to come to this country and disrespect it.

Coming here to become a Russian hero doesn’t give him the right to act without repercussions. He has the right to free speech but Cena has the right to shut him up. If Rusev insults America one more time, Cena will be there to prove how much fight America has. A USA chant strikes up as the Russians leave.

Rusev vs. Curtis Axel

Rusev jumps him before the match. Superkick, Accolade, 26 seconds. Axel didn’t even get to talk here and this felt like WWE saying “STOP CHEERING HIM WHEN WE DIDN’T TELL YOU TO!”

Post match Rusev calls America spineless and soulless, so here’s Cena to no music. He takes the hat and shirt off and charges to the ring. Rusev is quickly caught in the STF and passes out as Cena cranks on it hard. Cena pours some water on Rusev to wake him up but puts it back on Rusev, who immediately taps out.

Lana gets the mic and begs Cena to let him go, eventually giving him the US Title shot at Wrestlemania. The fans chant for Cena. No threat of retirement, no talk of Cena being frail, no Stephanie rambling about whatever nonsense she has on her mind this week. Just simple, good old fashioned AMERICA vs. Russia. It’s worked forever and it still works today. Stop overthinking these things.

Bray says he can’t wait much longer so tonight he raises the dead. Find him.

Rusev yells at Lana in Russian and she walks away, presumably to a movie set for a film that 18 people will see but will still be critically acclaimed, at least according to Michael Cole.

New Day vs. Tyson Kidd/Cesaro

Non-title but New Days says they want the belts. Just pencil in the non-title loss now. Kofi is on the floor this week. Kidd and Woods get things going with Tyson being dragged over to the corner for some backbreakers from Big E. Back to Woods who kicks Kidd in the head for two but Cesaro sneaks in to take out Woods’ knee. The champs start focusing on the knee but Big E. tries to come in for a save. Woods grabs a quick rollup into a faceplant for the fast pin on Kidd at 3:50.

Rating: D. DANG IT STOP PINNING THE CHAMPIONS TO SET UP A TITLE MATCH! You’re doing this nonsense with the Intercontinental Title and….screw it. I’m too annoyed to rant about how stupid this idea is and I don’t want this to turn into a repeat of last week’s review. Short version: I hate this idea, I’ve always hated this idea, I’m always going to hate this idea and I’m always going to have to put up with it because WWE writers are idiots that have no idea how wrestling works.

Natalya vs. Naomi

Joined in progress after the break with a pinfall reversal sequence leading to some quick near falls. The Sharpshooter goes on but Naomi makes the ropes. The guys get in a fight on the floor and Naomi hits the Rear View for the pin at 2:41.

Natalya takes Kidd’s title post match.

Los Matadores vs. Usos

There’s no transition between any of these three matches as everyone keeps coming out during the exits for the previous match. Fernando headscissors Jimmy down and we take an early break. Cole calls Los Matadores underrated. If they’re underrated, I can’t imagine who is actually low rated.

Back with Jey dancing and bringing in Jimmy for a double elbow. The fans chant for Punk as Fernando cranks on Jimmy’s arm but thankfully it dies down just as fast. Everything breaks down and Diego dives into a superkick for two but Fernando sends Jey to the floor. Jey nails his big dive and Fernando charges into a Samoan drop. Torito offers a distraction but Fernando shoves Jimmy into the bull for the upset rollup at 8:05.

Rating: D. Well that happened. I have no reason to care about either team, the division has another pair of losers as champions, and the most interesting feud connected to this is Naomi vs. Natalya, who won’t get anywhere near the Divas Title anytime soon because neither is a big enough star on Total Divas. But hey, at least it ate up some time on this show and that’s what matters with 20 days to the biggest show of the year right?

We recap the opening segment.

Rollins tells the Stooges to calm down and says he’s the mastermind of everything.

Here’s Bray Wyatt with something to say. He says he never sleeps but he’s always dreaming. He sees cities burning and governments crumbling because there is such beauty in chaos. In his dreams, the buzzards guide him to the shell of a man. Below the buzzards lay the Undertaker’s broken body. Pride is Bray’s favorite sin and it was pride that has led him to Undertaker. He doesn’t want to bow down to Undertaker or even stand by his side.

All he wants to do is walk over Undertaker on his way to the throne because he is the new face of fear. Everyone knew the Streak was going to end at some point and now Wrestlemania will be Undertaker’s final resting place. So will Undertaker accept his challenge? The urn is behind Wyatt and he suggests that it’s the way to bring him back. Bray opens the urn and nothing comes out of it.

He sets it back on the table and smoke stars to come out of it. Lightning appears on the screen and Bray shouts GIVE IT TO ME. The gong strikes and the fans are just as into it as they were last year. The lights go out and it sounds again before a spotlight shows the table and urn gone and Bray’s old rocking chair in the ring. Undertaker’s voice comes on and says you will rest in peace as the Wrestlemania logo and “the man comes around” (at least I think that’s what it said as they only showed it on a wide shot) appears on screen. Lightning hits the chair and lights it on fire, sending Bray to his knees in laughter.

Wyatt vs. Undertaker is official for Wrestlemania.

We look at Cena choking out Rusev again. Cena will have an exclusive interview just after Raw. I believe they said a Jericho DVD preview would have that spot.

Roman Reigns vs. Randy Orton/Seth Rollins

JBL on Reigns’ entrance: let’s get to it. That got way too big of a smile from me. The bell rings at 11:03 and Reigns goes right at Rollins, only to be sent into the middle buckle. Reigns is sent to the floor to give Seth control as Orton just stands on the apron looking bored. The Stooges get in an argument with Orton over not double teaming so Randy punches Noble in the face.

Rollins sends the two of them out, leaving he and Randy alone for the Authority. Reigns ducks a charge and sends Seth into the buckle to put both guys down. Seth crawls over but Orton moves away from the tag. A double middle finger (which the camera makes sure to pan down from) sends Rollins the message and the spear is good enough to pin Seth at 4:10.

Rating: D. Well it took long enough. They made it pretty clear when Kane and Big Show were ejected earlier in the night but they finally got to the point with this story. Granted it makes the last few weeks an even bigger waste of time, but at least it happened. Orton snapping is the right idea but it took way too long to get there.

Post match Reigns leaves and Orton yells at Seth before throwing him to the floor. He sends Rollins into the steps and says he would never rejoin the Authority. An uppercut knocks Rollins over the barricade and the beating continues in the crowd. Orton hits him in the back with a chair as Seth hasn’t done a thing yet. They head back to ringside with Rollins being thrown over the announcers’ table.

Orton RKOs Rollins through the table to end the show. Wouldn’t it have been far better to have Orton just show up and set up the match as a psycho? Oh right we had to see Stephanie calm things down and yell at people instead. What was I thinking? On top of that, sweet goodness it’s convenient that Orton got rid of everyone so easily in one night. Also, I’m so glad Reigns was used as little more than a warm body here. Seriously that could have been anyone and it would have had the same result.

Overall Rating: D+. This show was far better than last week, but it’s more to do with an absence of bad than anything really good. Stephanie throwing out Big Show and Kane at least made sense instead of just inserting herself into a segment so we remember who she is. That’s been the problem with so much of the build: it feels like they’re just throwing it together at the last minute and hoping we care enough about it that they don’t need to properly work at it.

The wrestling tonight was especially lackluster and really didn’t do much to enhance things. The show is far too focused on the Authority and the main event scene, which still doesn’t seem to have a focus. That’s the word for Wrestlemania: unfocused. The best developed feud for the whole show is Miz vs. Mizdow and that’s happening in a battle royal. But hey, we got Wiz Khalifa making an appearance and that put the live crowd to sleep and my TV on mute. That’s something right?

Results

Daniel Bryan b. Bad News Barrett – Running knee

Dean Ambrose b. Stardust – Dirty Deeds

Erick Rowan/Ryback b. Big Show/Kane – Rowan pinned Kane after a KO Punch from Big Show

AJ Lee b. Summer Rae – Black Widow

Rusev b. Curtis Axel – Accolade

New Day b. Tyson Kidd/Cesaro – Rollup into a faceplant to Kidd

Naomi b. Natalya – Rear View

Los Matadores b. Usos – Rollup to Jimmy

Roman Reigns b. Seth Rollins/Randy Orton – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown
Date: March 5, 2015
Location: Verizon Center, Washington DC
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

With just a few weeks to go before Wrestlemania, one of the main stories has been the Intercontinental Title scene. We’re definitely getting the big ladder match, but it’s not entirely clear who is going to be in it. It’s also not clear who is going to hand over the title belt to have it hung above the ring as everyone keeps stealing the thing. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Dolph Ziggler with the Intercontinental Title. He says he never got a rematch for the title against Bad News Barrett because he got fired by the Authority. This is the fifth month that storyline has now been mentioned in. Even Vince Russo didn’t let stories go that long. Dolph officially enters the ladder match, but thinks there’s still something missing. Last year, someone did everything he could and never stopped fighting to become champion. The fans chant YES and Dolph agrees, but he gets Bad News Barrett instead.

Barrett says Ziggler has something he wants. Dolph: “Looks? Charisma? A great Twitter account?” Bad News gets in the ring but Luke Harper sneaks in and decks Ziggler. The champ goes for his belt but Luke steps on it. Ziggler gets back up and everyone brawls so here’s Dean Ambrose to get in on the fighting. The champ is knocked to the floor because he’s just another guy in this story. Everyone brawls on the floor again so R-Truth sneaks down in spy mode, crawling on the mat and getting the belt before hiding under the ring.

Truth is in the back (VERY quickly too) and says he got the title in advance. “It’s like when I eat when I’m not hungry, so when I get hungry I don’t have to eat.” He tries to give the belt to Renee Young but she politely declines. “Where’s Gene Ambrose?” As usual, Renee Young is incredibly cute. I’m convinced she could be bald and still be adorable.

Cesaro/Tyson Kidd vs. Los Matadores

Non-title. Diego and Kidd start things off but both guys tag out less than thirty seconds in. Fernando hurricanranas Cesaro down and Diego does the same with a headscissors, only to get caught in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. A double stomp gets two for Cesaro and we hit the chinlock. Everything breaks down and Cesar goes after Torito, who kicks him in the leg. That’s not a DQ for some reason but Natalya trips him up, allowing the Cesaro Swing into a dropkick from Kidd to get the pin on Fernando at 2:25. This was a good squash for the champs that we haven’t seen before.

Kane and Big Show both say they’ll win the battle royal.

We recap the main event from Monday with Reigns getting pinned by Rollins but cleaning house to end the show. Yeah, the dive over the top and big spear were cool, but it’s like a cool fireworks display after your home team loses a ball game. It’s a fun visual, but your heart isn’t in it.

Ryback vs. Kane

Big Show stares at the Andre trophy at ringside. Kane stomps him down in the corner but runs into some spinebusters. Big Show offers a distraction to no avail as the Meat Hook ends Kane at 2:07. Now why did it take us this many months to get here?

Kane makes Big Show vs. Ryback for right now.

Big Show vs. Ryback

This is joined in progress after a break with Big Show getting in the ring and pounding Ryback into the corner. A clothesline puts the smaller bald power monster down and Show follows it with a slam. Ryback fires some shoulders in the corner but dives into a chokeslam attempt. The KO Punch misses and Ryback hits an awkward looking spinebuster. Kane gets dragged in for offering a distraction and takes a second Meat Hook, allowing Big Show to KO Ryback at 2:58. Dang that was close. We almost saw someone get one over on the Big Balds and I just wouldn’t want to live in that world. What was this supposed to prove anyway?

We look at Bray Wyatt lighting the casket on fire on Raw.

Bray Wyatt wants an answer from Undertaker. He has something Undertaker can relate to, and he’ll unleash its spirit this Monday. Not even Undertaker can outrun his own fate. The camera pans down and shows the urn.

Sheamus return video.

Video on the Daily Show segment with Jon Stewart from Raw. That might be the best celebrity appearance ever. If not then it’s WAY up there.

Brie Bella vs. AJ Lee

I’m not a fan of how Eden says “this is a Deeeeevas match”. This is fallout from AJ returning to help Paige on Monday. Nikki brings up the “Give Divas A Chance” line but says that doesn’t apply to AJ. The Bellas have been giving the Divas a chance since AJ has been gone and no one has lived up to their standard. It’s why they’re the stars of Total Divas and they don’t care who comes at them.

The match starts after a break with Paige now at ringside to balance things out. AJ cranks on an armbar and elbows Brie in the face. A high cross body gets two on Brie but she comes back with a nice middle rope dropkick for two of her own. Back up and AJ has to stop so Brie can clothesline her before we hit a chinlock.

That goes nowhere so Brie dropkicks her down again, followed by a clothesline for some two counts. A Hennig necksnap gets an even closer two as the fans don’t seem all that interested. We hit another chinlock before the running knee to the chest staggers AJ again. Brie immediately goes to the corner but misses another middle rope dropkick. Back up and AJ hammers away with kicks to the ribs to send Brie out to the floor. We get a big staredown outside before the Black Widow makes Brie tap at 7:42.

Rating: C. This was better than your usual Divas matches but a lot of that is due to it actually getting some time. Brie seemed to almost run out of offense about halfway through though. The Bellas are decent enough as the better than you heels and I can live with them far more when they’re not being treated like all time greats who just happen to be heels now. And when they’re not dominating the show. That really drove me insane.

Daniel Bryan thinks the Intercontinental Title picture is very interesting right now and can’t wait to see who comes out with the belt.

I really can’t stand the theme song for this year’s Wrestlemania and I keep forgetting that’s what the song is for when it starts up.

New Day vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow

Woods is the odd man out this week. Before the match we get a look at the commercial from Monday with Miz being embarrassed. Miz slapped Mizdow as a result but we still didn’t get the big face turn. Kofi and Miz get things going by trading armdrags until Miz runs him over for two. Some kicks give Kofi a breather and Mizdow tags himself in and cleans house. Cesaro/Kidd/Natalya are watching in the back as Mizdown’s figure four attempt is broken up. Miz tags himself in and orders Mizdow to the floor but Mizdow gets in his face. During the argument, Big E. gets the tag and it’s the Midnight Hour for the pin at 3:15.

Rating: D. This was the same thing they’ve done multiple times now but at least it was Miz taking the pin instead of Mizdow. I really wouldn’t mind if Woods was left outside as a permanent manager as he doesn’t add much to the team. The match wasn’t very good though and it just reenforced the same things we’ve established for weeks now. In other words, it’s a Smackdown match.

We look back at Heyman’s speech from Raw.

Brock Lesnar video.

Reigns says Heyman is known for running his mouth, but it’s true that Lesnar is going to hurt him at Wrestlemania. Everyone that gets in the ring with Lesnar gets hurt and he’ll be no different. The difference is Reigns will get up, lock his fist and hit a Superman Punch. Then he’ll spear Lesnar in half to win the WWE World Championship, and then Heyman and Lesnar will believe that. As usual, this was far better because they kept it short and simple.

Jack Swagger vs. Rusev

Non-title and Swagger is thrown to the floor a second after the bell. Back in and Swagger throws Rusev to the floor as we take a break. Back with Rusev getting two off a dropkick and we hit the chinlock. Swagger fights up and tries the Vader Bob but has to settle for the Patriot Lock, sending Rusev to the ropes. Back up and Rusev kicks him in the face and Accolades him for the submission at 7:50.

Rating: D. Egads find someone new for Rusev to beat up. This didn’t prove anything and was the exact same match these two have had roughly 19 times. Yeah we get it: Rusev is big and strong and can beat up Jack Swagger. We’ve known that for almost eight months now. FIND SOMEONE NEW.

Rusev poses but Curtis Axel pops up on screen and says don’t change the channel BROTHER. He’s often imitated but never duplicated DUDE. This Monday he’s going to put Rusev down 1-2-3 and then coming for the US Title at Wrestlemania. Whatcha gonna do when Axelmania runs wild on YOU??? If Buddy Landel can get over by being Ric Flair, Curtis Axel can get over by being Hulk Hogan.

Cameron thinks it’s time someone gives her a chance. Summer Rae comes up and says she should be getting the chance. Eva Marie thinks the two of them have no chance. This is what I was worried about when this thing started up. There are far more talented girls to give this spot to, but instead it’s going to the girls on the reality show.

Bad News Barrett/Luke Harper vs. Dolph Ziggler/Dean Ambrose

Truth is on commentary and doesn’t quite get the rules of the ladder match. He also doesn’t like how heights look when you look down at them. Harper Gator Rolls Ziggler to start but has to break up a sunset flip attempt. The running DDT is easily countered and R-Truth thinks he’s talking to Byron Jackson. A double tag brings in Ambrose to stomp on Barrett in the corner before the standing top rope elbow drop gets two. Ziggler and Ambrose clear the ring but nearly come to blows as we take a break.

Back with Barrett elbowing Dean in the face and handing it off to Harper for an elbow of his own. We hit the chinlock from Harper, who Truth accuses of not buying his shirt. Barrett comes back in and gets caught in a tornado DDT. Truth wants the match turned into a stepladder match and claims ladder discrimination.

The hot tag brings in Ziggler to speed things up but the big elbow drop gets two on Harper. Now the running DDT connects but still only gets two. A big side slam gets the same for Harper but Barrett and Ambrose come in to fight right next to them. Those two head back to the floor and Ziggler superkicks Harper, setting up the Zig Zag for the pin at 10:03.

Rating: C-. Totally standard midcard tag match here but it’s very nice to see that headlining the show instead of more dull stuff. It also helps that this is a logical part of the storyline and fits what they’ve been doing so far. Truth continues to be funny on commentary with a bunch of “what did he just say” lines. Oh and Barrett didn’t get pinned! Life is good.

Post match Barrett goes for the belt but Ambrose dives on him. Truth kicks Harper low but Daniel Bryan shows up to look at Truth holding the title. Truth hands him the belt and starts a YES chant. Bryan poses with the title but Stardust jumps Bryan and grabs the belt to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The show went by fast enough and it’s really nice to have stuff away from the main event feud for a bit. It’s also nice to not have the Authority making my blood pressure go through the roof but that’s a different story. This still doesn’t feel like a major show but I like the Intercontinental Title picture when it’s not as all over the place and the battle royal is starting to look a lot better. This was a nice way to cool things down and bring them back to normal after a bad Raw, but it’s still not a great show.

Results

Cesaro/Tyson Kidd b. Los Matadores – Cesaro Swing into a dropkick from Kidd

Ryback b. Kane – Meat Hook

Big Show b. Ryback – KO Punch

AJ Lee b. Brie Bella – Black Widow

New Day b. Miz/Damien Mizdow – Midnight Hour to Miz

Rusev b. Jack Swagger – Accolade

Dolph Ziggler/Dean Ambrose b. Bad News Barrett/Luke Harper – Zig Zag to Harper

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: March 2, 2015
Location: Prudential Center, Newark, New Jersey
Commentators: Booker T., John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We’re one step closer to Wrestlemania this week and the big event coming out of last week is Randy Orton not attacking Seth Rollins as everyone expected him to at the end of the show. That would seem to be a layup for a match at Wrestlemania but you never can tell around this company. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here are Rollins and the Stooges to get things going. Before he can say anything though, we get a clip of him appearing on the Daily Show with Jon Stewart last Thursday. Stewart is on his way here so Rollins suggests that he beg for forgiveness now and turn around. This isn’t like Lawler vs. Kauffman because unlike the Daily Show, every single person in this arena paid to see him tonight.

Cue Roman Reigns, who tells Rollins to keep talking because he wanted to hear what it sounded like to hear the fans tell Seth that he sucks. Rollins says he’s worth more than Michael Jordan because he can out work and out talk anyone, including Wiz Khalifa. He can even out eat Mark Henry. Khalifa is scheduled to perform next week and Henry is rumored to be here tonight so that sounds like an internet newsletter come to life.

Rollins doesn’t think Reigns can beat Brock Lesnar, but he can beat both Lesnar and Reigns. Roman asks if Rollins is man enough to make the main event of Wrestlemania a triple threat match as the fans chant for Punk. Rollins thinks it’s smarter to cash in on the winner of the match, or maybe do it the next night. Or maybe just cash in when no one is expecting it. Or maybe Reigns should just punch him in the mouth right now, which is what he does. The Stooges are laid out and Reigns stands on the Money in the Bank briefcase, but somehow that still doesn’t make me care about him.

Post break, Rollins yells at the Stooges for letting him get hit in the mouth. Randy Orton pops up and says the same thing. He thinks Rollins should demand a match with Reigns tonight to prove he can out talk Jon Stewart and out wrestle Roman Reigns as well. Rollins says he can out wrestle anyone on the roster, which doesn’t sit well with Orton. Dang they were getting close to not having a main event set up. I’m glad these coincidences just happened to take place at complete random.

Dean Ambrose vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title with R-Truth on commentary. Ambrose stomps away in the corner to start as Cole brings up the multi-man ladder match for the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania. Truth is officially announced for the match as Ambrose stomps away at the ribs and puts on a cross leg face rip. A bulldog sets up the standing elbow drop but Barrett crotches him to take over. The champ boots him out to the floor and holds up his title as we take a break.

Back with Ambrose fighting out of a chinlock but Barrett goes outside to yell at Truth for being a thief. Ambrose hits a suicide dive to take Barrett down though and hits the running standing elbow off the apron. This allows Truth to comically sneak over and steal the title belt because this is now a children’s comedy. Winds of Change plants Ambrose as Luke Harper comes up and takes the belt from Truth. The distraction lets Ambrose hit Dirty Deeds for the pin on Barrett at 9:23.

Rating: D. I have nothing left. Just nothing.

We recap Miz stealing Mizdow’s spot in a commercial last week on Smackdown.

Most of the midcard is in the back when Miz asks for silence. He calls Mizdow borderline worthless before giving us the world premiere of the new commercial. Mizdow tries to tell Miz something but Miz cuts him off and mentions a bunch of actors. As expected, it’s for an erectile dysfunction pill and has Mizdow involved with the good looking women. Back live and Mizdow can’t control his laughter. Neither can the rest of the people in the room.

Miz yells at everyone and says his little general has plenty of bullets. This is all Mizdow’s fault of course and Miz slaps him, again setting Mizdow off to a big reaction but once again he backs down. Mizdow almost has to eliminate him from the battle royal, but does it really matter is Mizdow doesn’t win the thing?

Here’s Bray Wyatt to ask if Undertaker is still the heart of fear. He wants Undertaker to come out and see him because Bray has built his own casket. Everything comes at a price though and Bray pulls out a gasoline can. He’s always had a fascination with fire because it has no prejudice and no feelings, just like him. No one can hide from him because everything burns, including Undertaker at Wrestlemania. He pours the gas on the casket and lights it on fire before shouting to find him. Like most Bray stuff, it makes just enough sense to get the idea across without being able to understand it.

Natalya/Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. Usos/Naomi

Genders have to match here. Jey and Kidd get things going but the champs take over with a quick double team. A Samoan drop puts Cesaro down but he bails to the floor, setting up a tag to the women. Naomi pops Natalya in the face and starts a quick pinfall reversal sequence, only to have Naomi kick Natalya in the ribs.

Naomi doesn’t buy a leg injury from Natalya and sunset flips her for two, only to have it quickly go back to Jimmy and Kidd. A Whisper in the Wind drops Kidd but he dives away from a double superkick and tags Natalya. The distraction lets Natalya get a rollup pin at 2:54. Didn’t we see this EXACT same story last month but with the titles switched? Now I’m supposed to want to see it at Wrestlemania?

Kidd and Natalya almost get in a fight but they hug it out.

Here’s John Cena with something to say after Rusev turned down his request for a rematch last week. He says this is one of those rare occasions where his detractors are having a good time because not only did Rusev beat him in their first match but his rematch was turned down. Cena is going to get his rematch and is going to bring the title back home to America. Rusev is a marked man and he’s going to lose that title at Wrestlemania. If he won’t defend it though, maybe he could just enter the Andre battle royal.

Oh screw it Stephanie comes out with that smug look on her face. She asks when do people just announce what match they’re in. Cena: “That’s what everyone does in the battle royal.” Stephanie doesn’t get the term Murderer’s Row (famous baseball lineup, means a great talent pool) and brings up a picture of her sitting on Andre’s knee after the first Wrestlemania.

She says Cena can’t disparage Andre’s legacy (what is she even talking about?) but Cena cuts her off and says this is about Wrestlemania. He says she won’t leave him off Wrestlemania so she goes into full on evil Stephanie mode and says WWE is bigger than any star it’s ever had. The question is what will Cena do without WWE, not the other way around.

Cue Curtis Axel of all people who says he’s already deserving a spot in the main event so he should win the battle royal too. A LOUD Axelmania chant starts up and Stephanie thinks he may be the next John Cena. Stephanie makes a match right now, but stops to say Cena can only get his match with Rusev by changing his mind. Axel: “WHATCHA GONNA DO WHEN AXELMANIA RUNS WILD ON YOU???” He rips the shirt off and Cena looks stunned. Cena gives him one chance to leave before pain comes to him.

John Cena vs. Curtis Axel

The bell rings after the break and Axel does Hogan poses. Cena stares a hole in the back of Axel’s head, hits some clotheslines, the AA and the STF for the submission at 2:02.

Post match Rusev comes out and again says no. Cole calls this humiliating because he doesn’t know the meaning of basic English words. Cole: “We could be coming up on the first Wrestlemania with no John Cena.” Me: “Oh screw off.”

Arn Anderson and Michael Hayes talk about Sting’s career and how great he really was. This lasts all of ten seconds.

Here’s HHH to talk about coming to this company twenty years ago. Now he’s the COO and a thirteen time World Champion. Eight days ago he offered Sting a chance to be immortal, but now he has the chance to make it as if Sting never existed. But why didn’t Sting come here before? HHH invites Booker T. into the ring because Booker recently said HHH politiced Sting from ever coming to the company. Why does he think that? That makes Booker sound like one of those internet fans that think they know the ins and outs of the business when they don’t know a thing.

Booker says no one has ever been able to control Sting and now HHH gets to deal with him at Wrestlemania. HHH thanks him for the opinion and then fires him. Booker goes to leave but HHH says he’s changed his mind. That was just an example of the control he has because he’s been handed the chance to end the last vestige of WCW and that’s what he’ll do. I can’t believe they’re STILL talking about WCW. That company has been out of business longer than it was in business and WWE is still bragging about defeating them.

Divas Title: Paige vs. Nikki Bella

Nikki is defending again in a rematch from Fast Lane. We even get Big Match Intros. Paige knocks her around to start but Nikki bails to the floor to avoid the PTO. A minute in and we hit the break. Back with Nikki cranking on the arms and Cole saying the action before the break was, and I quote (see what I did there?), fast and furious. Paige fights up but walks into a weak spinebuster for two.

We get the third mention of Total Divas in about the third minute of, ahem, action. A double clothesline puts both girls down and of course that one clothesline gets us to even after Paige has been in trouble for a few minutes. Paige hits three more clotheslines and a running dropkick for two. The PTO is loaded up again but Paige has to nail Brie. Nikki misses her forearm and eats a superkick, setting up the PTO. Cue Brie for the DQ at 6:46.

Rating: D. GIVE THEM A CHANCE! YOU MIGHT GET A FIVE MINUTE MATCH NEXT TIME! Yeah this was another obvious ending to set up the obvious return to set up the obvious “dream” tag match at Wrestlemania so the Bellas can show how good they really are and AJ can take a loss and be humiliated for calling out Stephanie on her nonsense. But hey, why bother entertaining when you can get one up on AJ in front of the dozens of people who are going to pay for this disaster of a Wrestlemania?

AJ runs in for the save and attacks the Bellas as we have new Super Best Friends.

Post break, AJ and Paige kind of agree to be friends to fight the Bellas.

It’s time for the Daily Show with Seth Rollins, complete with a copy of the Daily Show’s intro. Rollins takes some shots at Stewart’s Oscar hosting last year (it was seven years ago) and at his movie Rosewater for not doing so well as the Stooges applaud in the background. Cue the real Stewart to rips on the Curb Stomp being a New Jersey greeting instead of something to fear. He remembers the wrestlers that earned their spots like Sammartino and Monsoon.

Rollins never went up against the establishment like Austin or fought through injuries like Undertaker. Seth wants to be the poster boy, but just like posters, they get taken down when people are tired of them. If the Authority really cared about him, why isn’t he in the main event at Wrestlemania? He’s better on the mic and claims to be better in the ring, but it’s Lesnar vs. Reigns.

Stewart says the briefcase doesn’t belong to Rollins because he was at Money in the Bank and saw what really happened. That’s enough for Rollins as he grabs Stewart by the collar, drawing out Orton for the save, but Stewart kicks Rollins low and escapes on his own. This was one of the best celebrity performances ever in WWE and most of that is due to Stewart clearly being a huge fan. You can’t fake that kind of passion. Well you could, but if you’ve ever seen the Faculty, you know Stewart isn’t that good of an actor.

Post break Stewart leaves quickly to avoid retaliation.

Daniel Bryan vs. Luke Harper

Cole says Bryan isn’t going to Wrestlemania either. Harper starts fast but gets sent face first into the middle buckle. A running dropkick has him in trouble but Luke slams Bryan to the floor as we take an early break. Back with Harper kicking him in the face and hitting a half nelson suplex for two. A rollup gets the same for Bryan before Harper throws him down again. That’s fine with Bryan as he counters into the YES Lock for the win at 6:23.

Rating: D+. The Divas got more time than this match, which may or may not be about Bryan going into the title match at Wrestlemania. Just like the rest of this show, it’s like they have no real idea where the matches are going and we’re less than a month away from the show. Announce the things and let us know what we’re getting.

Barrett comes out to take the belt back, but it’s stolen by Ambrose, Harper, Truth then Harper again with the big man leaving with the belt. Ziggler cuts him off with a superkick though and puts the title on his shoulder. Dolph climbs the ladder with the belt and Bryan does a YES chant on the table.

Alundra Blayze Hall of Fame video. Two notes here. One, this is shocking if you know your history. Two, in the list of great champions over the years, we saw Moolah, Martel, Trish, the Bellas and Lita. Who on earth actually thinks that’s true? I mean, someone say that to me so I can laugh very hard in their face. They actually mention the belt in the trash moment in the video.

Orton yells at Rollins for going after Stewart but promises to have his back if Rollins needs him. Big Show and Kane come up and say they have his back, so Noble says Orton won’t be needed. Randy walks away, saying suit yourself.

Here’s Heyman who says he’s going to shoot from the hip. Yes Brock will be at Wrestlemania. Believe that. He’ll be anywhere he pleases before the title match. He’ll be anywhere he pleases after the title match. He’ll be anywhere he wants as the WWE Champion. Fans like to believe their fantasies, starting with Daniel Bryan having a chance at beating his client.

Reality is that Lesnar would squash him under his boot, so now it’s time for Roman Reigns. Heyman has to switch microphones before he rants about the fans buying into this idea of Reigns. WWE has already bought the confetti and the pyro but it’s a big waste of time.

Last week he said Sammartino, Hogan, Austin, Rock HHH and Cena couldn’t beat Lesnar. Fan: “ANDRE!” Heyman to the fan: “I DIDN’T MENTION HIM BECAUSE HE’S DEAD STUPID!” Of course there’s no Stephanie to defend Andre now because that segment earlier made no sense. Heyman says none of those people disputed a single thing he said last week because it’s all true. At Wrestlemania, Lesnar is going to conquer Reigns and maybe he’ll just Ronda Rousey Roman. BELIEVE THAT.

Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

Reigns knocks him around with ease to start and sends Rollins hard into the corner. Seth’s comeback is easily stopped with a knee to the ribs but he catches Reigns with a dropkick. We hit the right hands to the face and Reigns is sent hard into the buckle, but here’s Orton for a distraction as we go to our last break.

Back with Rollins holding a chinlock for a bit until Roman makes his comeback with some clotheslines and a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. Mercury breaks up the Superman Punch, allowing Rollins to score with an enziguri for two. Roman fights up again but Noble’s distraction lets Rollins kick him in the face.

A powerbomb from Reigns puts both guys down. They head outside with Big Show getting in a cheap shot but Reigns dives off the apron to take him down. Kane nails him in the ribs with a chair, giving Rollins a near fall back inside. We get yet another comeback from Reigns as he nails a Superman Punch, only to have Orton grab the foot, allowing Rollins to roll up Reigns for the pin at 15:38.

Rating: D+. The #1 contender for the World Title and the man that is supposed to save us from the horrors of Brock Lesnar just got pinned less than a month before the biggest show of the year. I don’t care what he does after the match. That ending is stupid and there was no reason to not just have the big DQ or something like that. My goodness do they want me to watch Wrestlemania or not?

Reigns snaps post match and destroys everyone not named Orton. He hits a huge dive over the top and spears Rollins out of the air as JBL shouts about him being ready. No man. Screw that noise. I’m not buying Reigns as anything when he’s losing less than a month before the big night, screwy finish or not. You don’t do that no matter what, especially when Lesnar isn’t here to set up the stupid match.

Overall Rating: F+. Where do I even start? First of all, how do you only have six matches on a three hour plus show with two of them not even breaking three minutes? That’s just unacceptable. Second, they really do seem to be making this stuff up as they go. We’re supposed to believe Cena and Bryan aren’t going to be at the pay per view? That’s your big selling point? “Hey people, come see this show without the biggest stars appearing!” Well they might not. I mean, they DARED to challenge Stephanie.

That’s the next major point: the Authority was all over the place tonight and not a single bit of it made sense. All of a sudden Stephanie is the patron saint of French giants and HHH is spouting off at the mouth about having to control Sting, whatever the heck that is supposed to mean. I can’t get over how bad that Stephanie segment was. How is that supposed to make me want to see Wrestlemania? Cena potentially in the battle royal because he can’t convince Rusev to defend the belt, which he’ll eventually do by going after the Russian flag, which won’t bring up a single mention of Big Show doing the same thing months ago?

The main event continues to be a one sided affair because Lesnar isn’t on TV. Heyman can only say YOU CAN’T BEAT HIM in so many different ways before it stops being entertaining. It’s one of those cases where you can only perform so well with what you’re given and that point has long since passed. Brock and Reigns need to do something face to face again, because the last time was the night after the Royal Rumble.

The Divas’ push comes off as a huge joke as the big chance seems to be a tag match at Wrestlemania and a pairing that we’ve seen before. I don’t really know why this is supposed to be a big match, other than AJ is the one not on Total Divas, which is the real title in this division these days. Give them a chance I guess, but if this is the chance, give them a bus ticket out of the company, because it’s not getting better anytime soon.

I have almost no desire to see Wrestlemania this year and I haven’t had that feeling in a very, very long time. There’s almost nothing on the card that I want to see and somehow it seems to get worse every week. It’s like they have no focus for the card this year other than “Reigns wins and we go from there.” To what? Reigns vs. Big Show? That’s a real possibility and I don’t think I can handle it. Then again, I don’t think I can handle three more episodes like this either.

Results

Dean Ambrose b. Bad News Barrett – Dirty Deeds

Usos/Naomi b. Natalya/Cesaro/Tyson Kidd – Rollup to Natalya

John Cena b. Curtis Axel – STF

Paige b. Nikki Bella via DQ when Brie Bella interfered

Daniel Bryan b. Luke Harper – YES Lock

Seth Rollins b. Roman Reigns – Rollup

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Smackdown
Date: February 26, 2015
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Byron Saxton

Wrestlemania is creeping up on us and you can see most of the card from here. The main story coming out of Monday was Randy Orton rejoining the Authority for about two and a half hours but ultimately turning back against them. For some reason he let Seth Rollins off easy, which likely won’t be addressed tonight. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Daniel Bryan to open things up. The fans chant YES but Bryan shouts NO for a change. That’s what he said a few years ago when he was frustrated at the lack of opportunities. He was wrong though, because the fans were in his corner. The fans gave him the opportunity to climb the ladder to the top and he won the WWE World Heavyweight Championship in the main event of Wrestlemania XXX. He had to give it up due to injury, but then he had another chance to get it back at Fast Lane.

However, he failed and there’s no Wrestlemania main event this year. Without that motivation, does that mean the YES Movement is dead? NO it does not! He won’t back down because he has big plans this year. Before he can get those out though, here’s Bad News Barrett who has somehow gone a full three days since losing a match.

No one wants to hear Bryan’s sob story because losers like Bryan don’t deserve the spotlight. Neither does a thief like Dean Ambrose, so here’s Dean for the brawl. He and Barrett fight to the floor so Bryan picks up the Intercontinental Title. Barrett demands it back but Ambrose decks him from behind and takes the belt back. Daniel didn’t seem interested in the belt other than keeping it away from Barrett. Cole sounds like he’s begging us to believe that Barrett is still champion.

Dean Ambrose vs. Miz

Is he going to step on Miz’s sunglasses and break his foot this time? No Mizdow because he might be off shooting the commercial he mentioned on Raw. An early rollup gets two for Dean but he gets caught in a neckbreaker for the same. We’re already in the chinlock but Ambrose fights up with rights and lefts. Some running forearms drop Miz again but Barrett comes back out to steal the belt again. The distraction doesn’t work for once though as Dean hits Dirty Deeds for the pin on Miz at 2:47.

We look at stills of Orton returning on Sunday and video of the story with Rollins on Monday. Lawler tries to defend Orton’s lack of action by saying he was worried about Big Show and Kane. I’d be worried about them too if I wanted anyone to stay awake during my matches. Seriously even Bryan couldn’t survive a Kane feud.

After a break, Barrett can’t get Renee’s name right but says Ambrose and Bryan don’t deserve to touch this title.

Naomi vs. Natalya

Say it with me: this officially started on Total Divas, even though there’s been almost no animosity between them on that show. Somehow though, that’s better continuity than you usually get on the main shows. They run the ropes to start and Natalya drops down, only to get rolled up for two. A headscissors drops Natalya again and we hit a chinlock with Naomi using her legs instead of the arms. Both girls hit cross bodies and the guys get into it on the floor. The referee holds Naomi back from a downed Natalya, allowing the Canadian to hit the discus lariat for the pin at 2:48.

Here are the Russians to brag about their win on Sunday. Rusev says this is what a championship looks like and Lana walks us through some stills of Cena’s spirit being crushed over and over again. Lana says Rusev isn’t one to sleep on the job and brags about Putin sending them congratulatory emails. She even shows us one, of course in Russian, which probably has a very funny translation.

Rusev repeats that Cena gets no shot at Wrestlemania so he needs a new opponent. Cue Jack Swagger as we flash back to August. Jack says there’s no such thing as a scared US Champion and the fight is on. Just like happens every single time, Rusev survives a storm and superkicks Swagger into the Accolade. Was there NO ONE ELSE they could have used for this spot? Like……sweet goodness there really isn’t much of anyone is there? Is the roster really that thin? Or are the faces really that lame?

Bad News Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

Non-title of course, because even Bryan hasn’t fallen enough to want the Intercontinental Title. Barrett isn’t sure where to put the title. Byron Saxton introduces R-Truth on commentary. Truth: “COACH! I MISSED YOU!” Ok that was funny. Barrett shoves Bryan down to start but gets sent into the corner for a kick to the ribs. The surfboard knee stomp sends Barrett back into the corner as Truth thinks a crumpet is a musical instrument.

More kicks stagger Barrett but the Winds of Change connect for two. Daniel bails to the floor as Truth keeps babbling about how he should be Intercontinental Champion. Back from a break with Barrett putting on a chinlock. I really do feel sorry for him. This is at least the second and probably third loser title reign for him and I don’t know what he does to deserve it.

Bryan fights up and hits more YES Kicks for two but Barrett avoids the running dropkick in the corner. The title was knocked to the floor and Barrett is distracted, allowing Bryan to hit the Flying Goat. Truth: “Bryan looks like a chicken dipped in Rogaine.” How do you even respond to that? The YES Lock goes on and Truth sneaks over to the corner and steals the belt but gets back on commentary with the belt under his jacket. Bad News makes the ropes but turns around for the running knee and the pin at 10:31.

Rating: C-. This feud is turning into a battle over who can suck more than the other guy. Somehow though, Barrett is going to wind up leaving with the belt because that’s how WWE works. Then they’ll wonder why no one cares about Barrett, the title, or the losers in the match. Truth was funny on commentary but that doesn’t mean I want to see him in the ring. At least the title is getting some attention tonight though.

Barrett can’t find the title but Truth denies any involvement. This is somehow making Barrett come off like someone we should feel sorry for, because we’re supposed to feel sorry for someone who loses every match he has.

We get a sitdown interview with Roman Reigns from earlier today. Reigns praises Bryan for a hard fought match on Sunday and says Bryan knows what it takes to get where Reigns is going. We look at a clip of Heyman’s speech on Monday about how Reigns just can’t do it. Roman is tired of hearing about how he can’t do something and says he’ll have to train harder than ever before. Lesnar has been on this stage before but Reigns doesn’t have any experience at this level. He needs to talk to people in his family to see what it’s like to be there.

Reigns wants Lesnar to be bouncing around the ring and at his very best when he faces a man representing a proud family who is trying to make a better life for himself and his family. My goodness this guy is just not good at making me care about him. That’s the problem with him: he’s just ok at most things other than spearing people in half. He’s great as a heavyweight monster, but as a humanized character, he’s just stuck in the middle of the pack. Five minutes of him talking about what he needs to do didn’t make me care about him any more than I did in the first place, and I can’t imagine it getting better anytime soon.

Truth runs into Ambrose and says he beat Barrett for the title. Ambrose says he’s coming for the belt so Truth just hands it to him. Cole: “HAHAHAHA!” And that sums up the whole thing better than I ever could.

Fandango vs. Curtis Axel

Axel shows us a clock which has him in the Royal Rumble for 32 hours, giving Cole and Lawler something else to laugh about. Fandango jumps him to start so Axel throws him over the top. Curtis: AXELMANIA! Fandango plants him with a release suplex and the Last Dance is good for the pin at 1:03. Again, I care about the loser more than the winner.

Miz interrupts Mizdow’s commercial shoot and mocks him for just ripping Miz off. The director didn’t know Miz was interested in being part of this commercial and gives him the part instead. That’s ANOTHER face who is treated like a loser, but at least he hasn’t……when did he last win a match? This company is really bad at setting up good guys. Of course they have to face adversity, but they really need to win once in awhile. This idea of just letting the fans carry them doesn’t hold up for everyone but it seems to be all WWE is doing lately. Either that or have the champ lose every time.

Barrett will be defending the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania in a ladder match against an unknown number of unnamed opponents. Sheamus returns there maybe?

We get the Sting career retrospective. WWE does a lot of things wrong but they’re awesome at things like this.

Adam Rose vs. Goldust

Rose has entered the Andre battle royal. Before the match we get a recap of Stardust attacking his brother on Sunday. Rose jumps him to start and charges into the powerslam for two. The Final Cut is good for the pin at 1:02.

Stardust is dressed as a monkey Rosebud and jumps Goldust.

Bray Wyatt claims that Undertaker is clinging to his legacy. He’s a snake, but even the cleverest rat can only run from the snake for so long. How long does Undertaker think he can hide? Time is ticking because Wrestlemania is approaching. Come find him.

Seth Rollins/Kane/Big Show vs. Erick Rowan/Dolph Ziggler/Ryback

We get the Jon Stewart response to Rollins before the match starts. Kane headlocks Rowan to start but gets runs over by a shoulder block. A fall away slam (that’s way too popular of a move these days) and jumping elbow get two for Rowan and it’s off to Ziggler for a nice response. Kane drives Dolph into the corner for a tag to Rollins, who is quickly dropped with a neckbreaker.

Big Show makes a blind tag and throws Ziggler down with a cobra clutch throw as we take a break. Back with Kane holding Ziggler in a chinlock before kicking him in the face to give Rollins two. Big Show comes back in with a headbutt to set up the Vader Bomb. Big Show: “I’M GOING TO HIT MY MOVE!” It’s only good for two though and Dolph scores with a quick Fameasser but he has to add a running DDT to Kane. That’s finally enough for the tag to Ryback and house is cleaned.

An overhead belly to belly sends Rollins flying into the corner and a big powerslam plants him for good measure. The Meat Hook connects but Mercury comes in for a distraction. Big Show breaks up a double Shell Shock as everything breaks down. Rollins dives onto Rowan but his Blockbuster attempt is caught in a Shell Shock. Kane makes a save but eats a Zig Zag, only to get dropped by Rollins. The Stooges are thrown in again and the distraction lets Ryback hit Shell Shock on Rollins for the pin at 11:07.

Rating: C+. Well the booking has been frustrating all night so why not job out Rollins again while trading wins in the never ending feud as well? If there’s one good thing here, it’s Ryback looking like a monster this whole time. However, none of this matters until it actually leads somewhere for him. Odds are he’ll be put into the battle royal though and get lost in the shuffle.

Overall Rating: D+. This show was one of the most head scratching shows I’ve seen in a very long time. Between having the Intercontinental Title literally handed over from one guy to another in what felt like a parody sketch instead of…..whatever that really was supposed to be to faces looking like hopeless losers to somehow making me feel bad for a villain to trading wins with Big Show and Kane continuing to look strong to set up whatever in the world they’re going to do, this show was every problem WWE has going on right now.

The short matches are a confusing point for me. On one hand, I really don’t want to see these matches keep going on and on, but at the same time I’d like to see a match get enough time to not be a huge waste. Throw in Roman Reigns just talking for five minutes and not getting anywhere and this was a really rough show to sit through.

Results

Dean Ambrose b. Miz – Dirty Deeds

Natalya b. Naomi – Discus lariat

Daniel Bryan b. Bad News Barrett – Running knee

Fandango b. Curtis Axel – Last Dance

Goldust b. Adam Rose – Final Cut

Dolph Ziggler/Erick Rowan/Ryback b. Kane/Big Show/Seth Rollins – Shell Shock to Rollins

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 23, 2015
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T., John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re less than five weeks away from Wrestlemania XXXI and the main event of Brock Lesnar defending his WWE World Title against Roman Reigns is set in stone as Reigns defeated Daniel Bryan last night at Fast Lane. Other than that, it seems that most of last night’s matches were designed to set up rematches at some point between now and Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence. That’s not something you see to open the show very often anymore.

Here’s Randy Orton to open the show to a VERY loud pop for the first time in four months after a Curb Stomp made him think he was Steve Austin in the sequel to a movie that didn’t do well enough to warrant a sequel eight years later. He says he isn’t here to deliver a twenty minute speech but he has to get something off his chest. He’s been gone for the last four months and we see a clip from November of Orton taking a Curb Stomp onto the table and another on the steps.

Orton is here to tell the Authority that he’s just getting started. There will be no more running and hiding for Seth Rollins, because Orton wants him out here right now. Instead he gets HHH, Stephanie, Big Show and Kane, none of whom look happy. Stephanie congratulates him on another comeback and starts a Randy chant. Orton says he isn’t part of the team anymore but she’s willing to forgive him. The offer of a handshake gets a no so Big Show says joining the Authority was the best decision he ever made and it would be the best one Orton can make. I’m pretty sure Show’s best decision ever was filming Vince having sex with a goat. How else can you validate his continued pushes over the years?

Back to Stephanie for her evil voice as she talks about all the things Orton has done over the years, including even some things to her. And you KNOW it’s serious when someone challenges Stephanie because she’s the most amazing thing in the history of ever right? Apparently there’s going to be a business conference on this subject later in case this segment didn’t beat it over your head hard enough.

The Authority goes to leave but this segment has only gone on for thirteen minutes so it’s not done yet. Orton says he’ll be there and drops the mic, so now it’s over. What an odd way to stretch it out even more. By that I mean it adds a little something else to the story and isn’t just the same thing over and over again. This segment was exactly what gets old fast: just filling in time with the same things being said in different voices until we get to the conclusion.

Bad News Barrett vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title even though Barrett doesn’t have his title belt after Ambrose stole it last night. Barrett’s entrance takes us to a break and we come back with him in mid-promo, talking about how he’s still the real champion. R-Truth is on commentary to actually tie things into his win last week. Ziggler cranks on a wristlock to start but Barrett takes him down into a chinlock.

Dolph fights up and grabs a quick neckbreaker, followed by an elbow drop for two. The champ sends him hard into the buckle for a near fall of his own before just punching Ziggler in the face. Back up and Barrett misses a big boot, tying himself up on the top rope. A dropkick sends Barrett out to the floor and us to a break. Back with Ziggler charging into the corner for right hands to the head of his own. He counters Wasteland into a DDT for two before walking into a big boot to the face.

Barrett almost falls down on a powerbomb attempt for two but the Bull Hammer is countered into a rollup for two more. Both guys miss a bunch of stuff in a fast sequence, capped off by Winds of Change getting two. The announcers freak out about R-Truth trending on Twitter as Ziggler avoids a charge into the post, setting up the Zig Zag for the pin at 11:07.

Rating: C-. The match was decent but I’m out of complaints to make about how the Intercontinental Title is being killed. Somehow, the fact that Ambrose has stolen it makes the belt look better than it has in months. Barrett has now lost to R-Truth, Dean Ambrose and Dolph Ziggler in five weeks. Imagine that happening to any WWE World Champion and watch WWE change course immediately. Instead they cranking it up, and unfortunately I have a feeling Barrett will walk out with the title while the announcers claim he’s proven something.

Ambrose comes out to hold the title in Barrett’s face but Bad News doesn’t do anything. Ziggler stares down Ambrose and the title.

We look back at Sting and HHH’s confrontation last night with Booker T. bringing up DX invading WCW back in 1998.

It’s time for the business conference in the back with Rollins and Orton present. She yells at Rollins for thinking this is about him and tells Kane off for not looking at the bigger picture. Stephanie welcomes him back with open arms and Orton shakes Rollins’ hand. This would be more wasting time as everyone and their mother knows those two are fighting at Wrestlemania. Stephanie makes Orton/Rollins vs. Bryan/Reigns for tonight.

Sheamus is returning.

Prime Time Players vs. Ascension

Before the match, Ascension says the newest inductees into the Hall of Fame, the Bushwhackers, wouldn’t last four seconds with them. Viktor pounds on Young in the corner to start and a big elbow knocks Darren into the ropes. A double shoulder gets two on Young and a double slam gets the same with Titus making the save. Everything breaks down and Titus is knees out to the floor, but Darren small packages Viktor for the pin and Ascension’s first loss at 3:07.

Rating: D-. Good grief pick someone to be in the tag division already. We’ve tried the Prime Time Players already and that went nowhere, so now we’re pushing them again because Young is back? I know WWE hates to admit it, but Young is one of the least interesting people on the roster. Ascension could have been an interesting change of pace had they not been massacred by commentary and old guys, but WWE never has been the best at thinking ahead.

Here’s Roman Reigns for a chat. He’s been on a huge ride lately and it all started back at the Royal Rumble. It wasn’t enough to go through 29 other superstars though and he had to beat Daniel Bryan last night, but that’s exactly what he did. Now he’s going to Wrestlemania, which the fans don’t seem to have a problem with.

Before he can go on, here’s Daniel Bryan to interrupt. Bryan talks about the doubters who don’t believe in Roman Reigns. He saw Reigns win the Royal Rumble (fans aren’t too thrilled with that) but somehow, he felt like all of these people. Inside, he booed and booed because a lot of people see potential in Reigns, but Bryan is the biggest Reigns doubter of them all. He sees all the strength and athletic ability in Reigns but he’s seen so many people with those attributes but no heart.

That heart is why people like Daniel Bryan but don’t like Roman Reigns. However, last night, Bryan gave it everything he had but it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t from a lack of trying, but due to Reigns just being too much for him. Last night, Reigns showed how much heart he had and it was enough to beat him. Bryan shakes his hand and says he’d love to team with Reigns later tonight. Now go beat up Brock Lesnar in the main event of Wrestlemania. Bryan leaves and here’s Paul Heyman to talk to Reigns.

Paul comes to the ring and shakes Reigns’ hand for having a great main event and victory last night. He isn’t really surprised though because his money would always be on Roman Reigns against any man Reigns ever fought. Reigns vs. Sammartino in 1975, Reigns vs. Hogan and Andre in 1987, Reigns vs. Austin in 1998, Reigns vs. Rock in 1999, Reigns vs. HHH in 2000, Reigns vs. Cena anytime in the past thirteen years, Heyman would bet on Roman. His money was on Reigns at the Royal Rumble and it was on him again last night.

However, Reigns isn’t fighting a man at Wrestlemania, because he’s fighting a beast. Reigns has Heyman’s respect, but he can’t slay the beast. He can’t be the one to beat the one in 21-1. Couldn’t you argue that the one in 21-1 is Punk, as he’s the last victory and therefore number 21? At the end of the night, the ring announcer will proclaim Brock Lesnar still WWE World Heavyweight Champion.

Reigns asks why Heyman isn’t standing in front of him. He tells Heyman to keep motivating him like this because Paul was there when Reigns went face to face with Lesnar after the Royal Rumble. Lesnar better respect him, because he isn’t going to like him much after Wrestlemania. This was the latest hard sell for Wrestlemania, but I’m really hoping Lesnar wins at this point, just for the shock of it. Reigns triumphing after being set up as the conqueror doesn’t work that well.

Tag Team Titles: Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. Usos

This is the Usos’ rematch after Kidd and Cesaro took the belts last night. Cesaro quickly takes Jimmy into the corner for a tag to Kidd before taking Jimmy outside, setting up a dropkick through the ropes from Tyson. Jey runs around and climbs the steps for a clothesline to drop Cesaro. They stay outside with Kidd hiding behind his wife and sending Jimmy face first into the apron. Back in and it’s Cesaro hammering Jimmy for two as things finally settle down.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Jimmy dives over and tags Jey. Everything breaks down all over again with the Usos catching Kidd diving off the apron and throw him into the barricade. Cesaro gets backdropped on the floor as well before Jimmy gets two off a high cross body. Back from a break with Jey in trouble until he blocks Kidd’s springboard elbow drop by raising his knees. Cesaro drops him with an uppercut for two though and the champs maintain control.

The Cesaro Swing into the dropkick gets two and JBL says these two have been the best teams in the company for the past year. Jey finally catches Cesaro with an electric chair drop, setting up Jimmy’s Superfly Splash, only to have Kidd break it up with another springboard elbow. Apparently Kidd is legal, despite the lack of a tag. A spinning enziguri takes Kidd down and sets up the running Umaga Attack, which only hits buckle. Naomi breaks up Tyson’s rollup with feet on the ropes and the girls get into it outside. Natalya crotches Jimmy though and that’s a DQ at 10:30.

Rating: C+. Not as good as last night’s match but it still worked well enough. That being said, I don’t need to see a third match between these guys, especially after a clean pin last night and a DQ here. Kidd and Cesaro could be good champions but they need a deeper division to defend against. Like Ascension for example, but we need to push Darren Young instead of building them up.

Miz is in the back and yells at Mizdow for packing his bag wrong. The only title he hasn’t won so far is the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal, which would mean even more star power. That’s what Mizdow wants to talk to him about: ever since he’s been hired as a personal assistant, he’s been getting calls from casting directors and one of them has made Mizdow a spokesman in a commercial. Miz isn’t pleased and has Mizdow lint roll his jacket. These two are pretty easily the best written characters on the show.

We look back at Bray Wyatt popping out of a casket and making it known that he wants Undertaker at Wrestlemania.

Wyatt is standing next to a casket and says this time of year must be hard for Undertaker as he’s thinking about 21-1. This casket signals the end of Undertaker’s career as he’s been reduced to a pile of broken bones and broken dreams on the grandest stage of them all. The evil that used to exist inside Undertaker now resides in him. It’s so much better down here, so come find him.

Jack Swagger vs. Stardust

Stardust is back in the full body attire after having just tights last night. They slug it out to start with Stardust hitting the drop to the mat right hand. The Swagger Bomb doesn’t work but Stardust dives into the Patriot Lock. That goes nowhere but cue Goldust for a distraction and a second Patriot Lock is good for the submission at 1:58.

Here’s Cena to talk about his loss last night. On the last stop on the Road to Wrestlemania, he took Rusev to his greatest limits. Cena knew he was going to be the first man to break the “Acolyte”, but he never got the chance. A low blow put him down and he was never able to break the hold, but he never gave up.

Cena is fine with losing, but he’s not fine with the way it happened. He calls Rusev a coward and here are the Russians. Lana says they told him so because just like all Americans, Cena gave up. Since last night, they’ve been receiving messages of congratulations from Putin. Last night, Rusev proved that no one can beat him so Cena needs to admit that he was defeated, just like the United States. That gets Cena’s dander up but Lana shows stills of Cena passing out in the Accolade.

Cena says his life is a lie when he refuses to get up, but he’s going to keep going until he gets the job done. That’s what he does and it’s what America does too: they keep getting up when they have to fight. If Putin is congratulating them, he should be embarrassed. Seventy years ago, the flag was raised at Iwo Jima because that’s what America does.

Cena is going to bring the US Title home to the United States because he’s going to beat Rusev at Wrestlemania. Rusev asks why Cena deserves a rematch and turns him down. This is FINALLY doing the story they should have done all along. Not eye injuries or Cena is old. USA vs. those horrible Soviet scums. It’s worked for like, ever, and it’s going to work now.

We recap the Orton vs. Rollins stuff from earlier.

Rollins and the Stooges come in to see Orton to talk some strategy for tonight. Orton says tonight is about taking care of Bryan and Reigns, which Rollins agrees with. Not much to this segment.

Paige comes out for a match before the break, but instead we come back for a profile on Sting. It’s your usual profile with the talking heads, but we also get a big feature on the war with the NWO. There’s a quick mention at the end of the feud with HHH to tie it together.

Bella Twins vs. Paige/Emma

Paige tries to go after Nikki but gets shoved to the floor, allowing Brie to hit the Bella Buster on Emma for the pin at 30 seconds.

JBL thinks Paige will be back if she can find another friend. Maybe someone who could light it up with her?

Bushwhackers Hall of Fame video. There are some shots of them as the Sheepherders but no mention of the team by name.

Here’s Curtis Axel, now with a Hulkamania style Axelmania shirt. He was never eliminated from the match and how now lasted an unprecedented 29 days in the match. Axel enters himself into the Andre the Giant battle royal and says you can’t stop Axelmania.

Ryback vs. Curtis Axel

Axel’s offer for a handshake is ignored and Ryback brings up their time as a tag team. They were one of the best teams of all time, but only Ryback will be winning the battle royal. Meat Hook and Shell Shock end Axel in 44 seconds.

Seth Rollins/Randy Orton vs. Roman Reigns/Daniel Bryan

Before the match we get a package on Rollins’ feud with the Daily Show’s Jon Stewart. Rollins gives a big over the top introduction for Randy, prompting everyone in his corner to applaud. Bryan and Rollins get things going with Bryan quickly trying the surfboard, sending Rollins running over for a tag. Reigns comes in as well and runs Orton over, only to charge into a dropkick. It’s back to Bryan as they start working on Orton’s arm and shoulder. The backbreaker makes its return to put Bryan down but he’s able to backdrop Rollins to the floor. The Authority huddles up as we take a break.

Back with Reigns in trouble and Rollins putting on a chinlock. Reigns slams him down to escape and dives over for the hot tag to Bryan. Daniel speeds things up but the YES Kick is countered into a rollup. That’s countered into the YES Lock but Orton makes the save. Reigns and Orton are sent to the floor with Rollins being sent out on the other side, setting up the Flying Goat.

The Stooges’ distraction lets Rollins crotch Bryan on top, allowing Orton to load up a superplex. Big Show’s applause isn’t enough though and Bryan punches Randy down. The flying headbutt misses though and it’s a double tag to bring in Rollins and Reigns. The Samoan flapjack sets up the Superman Punch to Mercury, allowing Seth to enziguri Reigns down.

Another tag brings in Orton for the Elevated DDT but Rollins tags himself in. That’s not cool with Orton as he DDTs Reigns anyway but goes outside to yell at Big Show and Kane. Reigns avoids the Curb Stomp and hits the Superman Punch, only to have Bryan tag himself in, setting up the running knee for the pin on Seth at 16:13. Reigns didn’t seem to mind Bryan taking the pin.

Rating: C. Standard main event tag match here with the ending that everyone was expecting in one form or another. I’m glad Reigns vs. Bryan didn’t start up again as that story needs to stay done. Orton coming back is a big deal and that’s exactly what it needs to be focused on. His match with Rollins at Wrestlemania should be awesome if they can do what they should, and this was a decent enough way to set it up.

Post match Orton loads up the Punt on Rollins but stops to RKO Noble. Orton picks Rollins up in the corner….and leaves so the announcers can plug the Network’s first birthday to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a really tricky one to grade as they went straight into Wrestlemania mode and basically jettisoned every boring method of storytelling they had been doing for months beforehand. That being said, it’s still not the most interesting stuff in the world to set up.

This just doesn’t feel like a good or interesting Wrestlemania, especially given how quickly they have to build to it. Five weeks just isn’t enough time to do a proper build, especially after weeks of sitting through most of the same stories in the buildup to Fast Lane. This show was all about storytelling, and it has to be given how little time they have left.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Bad News Barrett – Zig Zag

Prime Time Players b. Ascension – Small package to Viktor

Usos b. Tyson Kidd/Cesaro via DQ when Natalya interfered

Jack Swagger b. Stardust – Patriot Lock

Bella Twins b. Paige/Emma – Bella Buster to Emma

Ryback b. Curtis Axel – Shell Shock

Daniel Bryan/Roman Reigns b. Seth Rollins/Randy Orton – Running knee to Rollins

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

It says a lot that I had completely forgotten this show was tomorrow night. Fast Lane is a show that really doesn’t need to exist and most of these matches could have easily been done as big time Raw main events over the course of a few weeks. Instead though they need a way to bulk up the Network subscriptions, and to be fair the free month for Survivor Series was an amazing success. This show really isn’t doing much for me though so let’s get to it.

We’ll start with the match recently added: a six man tag between Kane/Big Show/Seth Rollins vs. Ryback/Dolph Ziggler/Erick Rowan. This match makes sense because the Survivor Series WILL NEVER DIE. It was also odd that you had these six guys all sitting around doing nothing so why not just get a big tag match to put them all on the show? It’s definitely the most logical move they could go with and avoids repeats of singles matches we’ve already seen for a change.

As for the winners, of course it’s the Authority, because we have to keep Big Show and Kane looking strong see. Oh and that Rollins guy gets to get a nice rub too. Rollins hasn’t had much to do since the Rumble and it really goes to show you how up and down the booking is. Yeah he’s beaten Ziggler a few times, but who hasn’t at this point? Rowan is done to say the least, but Ryback has been treated as a pretty big deal since he’s been back. Still though, the Authority wins and they win without much trouble.

I’ll take Stardust over Goldust, likely setting up a Wrestlemania rematch for Goldust’s career. The guy has been around forever and would be excellent for an agent’s job. Stardust needs a win to establish himself as a singles guy, which could be interesting if they let him run with it.

Usos retain the titles because Cesaro and Kidd are just there to give the smarks something to cheer for. Not that it matters anyway as the Ascension is waiting in the wings to take the belts. I wouldn’t mind a more interesting story for the titles, but at least it’s based on something that happened in WWE rather than the stupid reality show.

Ambrose somehow loses the title shot because Barrett has lost almost everything leading up to this match, so why not just let him keep the title? Besides, Ambrose hasn’t won on pay per view since….well since the Shield was around actually. Couple that with him not winning a singles pay per view match since Night of Champions 2013 and there’s no reason to think he should win tomorrow night.

Speaking of horrible stories that make my soul hurt and have no basis in logic or reasoning while involving babbling morons who are a disgrace to their far more talented NXT counterparts but fill out tight tops and shorts better and therefore are more entitled to a spot on the main roster, Nikki retains the title over Paige because TOTAL DIVAS MEANS THEY’RE SO TOTALLY CELEBRITIES and since that show is about the Bellas, they’re more important than Paige. Or something.

I’ll actually take Rusev to keep the title, albeit not in a straight finish. This screams Wrestlemania rematch, which isn’t something I care for most of the time. They also seem to be having some issues with how this match is booked, as the eye injury has been forgotten and for some reason they’re not just going with America vs. Russia, which has worked for the better part of eternity. Instead it’s “Cena is suddenly old, even though no one but Vince thinks that”, which is a pretty lame storyline. Anyway, Rusev retains and Cena gets his big win at Wrestlemania…..in theory. I’d love to see Rusev beat him on the big stage.

That leaves us with Bryan vs. Reigns for the Mania title shot, and I really think they’re going with the triple threat. It would fit perfectly with this show meaning nothing, so why not just have them go with that and put Bryan in the title match? It makes sense (or as much sense as this story can make) and gets us where we need to go. Reigns vs. Lesnar wouldn’t work on its own nearly as well, but it’s clear that this Wrestlemania is going to suffer from them not knowing where they want to go, at least on paper.

Oh and HHH calls out Sting.  They’ll talk, they’ll talk some more, they’ll pretend the Invasion wasn’t a thing, Sting will punch him a few times, a match will be made for Wrestlemania, it will take about three times longer than it should.

Overall, as I’ve mentioned more than once in the preview, this show doesn’t need to exist. It’s there because the Network needs something to hype up and doesn’t make sense with the storylines they have. It’s a weak card which will likely lead us to a weak Wrestlemania, so why would I want to see this? I’ll be watching, but I think the Oscars are going to distract me from this dull show more than once.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

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Smackdown
Date: February 19, 2015
Location: BB&T Center, Sunrise, Florida
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the final show before Fast Lane and thankfully the ending to Monday’s show was a bit more interesting than trying to figure out exactly when Bryan turned into a whiny loser who is using his contractual obligations to get back in the title picture instead of just winning matches like he did last year. Other than that we have Rollins vs. Ziggler again tonight because what else could they air? Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Reigns vs. Bryan story from Monday with both of them messing with the others match and a big brawl to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Miz vs. Daniel Bryan

Before the match, we see Miz ripping on Mizdow earlier in the night, but he insists it’s just trying to help Mizdow from being a loser. Mizdow of course out pops Miz, earning him a severe tongue lashing. Miz orders him to go get an Egyptian cotton towel for after his match. Apparently Bryan wants Miz to only use American goods and kicks some patriotism into his former mentor.

The running clothesline and corner dropkick set up a top rope hurricanrana but Miz bails to the floor to avoid the running knee. Back in and Miz kicks out the knee before driving knees into the hamstring. You don’t try to match submissions with Bryan though and the YES Lock is good for the submission at 2:54.

Ryback vs. Kane

Ryback hammers him into the corner to start and hits a decent belly to belly. A threat of the Meat Hook sends Kane outside in the same sequence from the first match with the running knee. Back in and Kane hits a running DDT followed by a big boot to send Ryback into the corner. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Ryback fights up with a Thesz Press and the Warrior Splash. Ryback gets knocked off the top rope to the floor, which means absolutely nothing as he hits the Shell Shock immediately after getting back in for the pin at 3:51.

Rating: D. This was a ten minute power match packed into less than four minutes. Ryback and Kane could have a decent match if they were given a few more minutes but they had to fly through this instead, likely so we can see a bunch of videos from Raw. Also, Ryback can pin Kane but Reigns can only beat him by countout? These are the kind of things that just make no sense and make you wonder if anyone is actually thinking backstage.

We recap Ambrose making Barrett sign the contract on Monday.

R-Truth vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title so just raise Truth’s hand now. Ambrose is on commentary and wants to know why Truth is shouting WHOMP THERE IT IS, even though it’s on his iPod. Barrett stomps away in the corner as Dean talks about the title being the backbone of the company. Truth gives Barrett a pelvic thrust, earning him a beating in the corner.

Cole asks how that contract signing can stand. Dean: “Well there’s a graphic for the match on WWE.com and the internet is always true.” We hit the chinlock on Truth as Barrett talks trash to Dean. Truth fights up with ease and a side kick gets two. Ambrose ignores more trash talk, even as Barrett takes Truth to the floor and beats him up right in front of Dean. Back in and Dean turns his back on Barrett, allowing Truth to grab a rollup for the pin at 3:09.

Rating: D. Egads man I was kidding about Truth winning. Remember the good old days when champions ACTUALLY WON MATCHES??? On top of that, history shows us that Truth isn’t going anywhere after this win because pinning the champion is a plot device instead of a way to elevate someone. I don’t know what Barrett did to deserve this treatment, but he’d have a better future as a shark dentist than as Intercontinental Champion.

Vince is on the cover of Muscle and Fitness.

We look back at Cena and Rusev fighting on Monday. If nothing else, that segment proved that American healthcare is better than Russian, as Cena’s eye went from the focal point of the match to ignored in the span of a week.

Bray Wyatt says find him before he finds you.

Sheamus return video.

New Day vs. Ascension

Kofi is the odd man out here. Viktor and Woods get things going with Xavier planting a knee into the ribs for two. Ascension drags Woods into the corner for a double teaming, featuring a lot of choking in the corner. Back to Viktor for a kick to the ribs but Woods rolls over for an ice cold tag to E. Viktor gets thrown around but gets a reprieve as Big E. wipes away the sweat. A cheap shot from Konnor allows Viktor to send Big E. into the post, setting up Fall of Man for the pin at 2:52. I’m not surprised they’ve already pulled the plug on New Day, even though I like at least two of the members of the team.

Luke Harper vs. Roman Reigns

My goodness Harper has cooled down since winning that Intercontinental Title. It really has become a death knell in the last few years. Reigns throws him into the corner and stomps Luke down with ease. More stomping sends Harper outside and Roman nails him with a running clothesline. If Reigns can do one thing as well as anyone, it’s explode with running moves.

Back in and something like the ProtoBomb gets two but they head right back outside where Luke sends him into the steps. Back in and a slingshot hilo of all things gets two for Harper but Reigns fights out of a headlock. A big Samoan drop sends Harper flying but he escapes another and hits a swinging Boss Man Slam for two. Reigns pops back up, no sells a superkick and spears Harper down for the pin at 4:49.

Rating: C. As much as I can’t stand the no selling of hard shots to the face, this is the kind of win that makes Reigns look better. Have him get in there for a hard hitting match and then spear someone in half for the pin. It’s a really basic way of getting him over and to show off his physical abilities instead of whatever the heck the story with Bryan is supposed to be. I’ve watched the entire thing so far and I still don’t get it. What I do get however is Reigns spearing people and pinning them because it looks cool.

Recap of Flair and HHH from Raw for the response to the acceptance for the challenge to talk.

Big Show vs. Erick Rowan

I don’t see this going well. Show kicks Rowan to the floor before the bell and throws him into the steps. He picks Rowan up by the beard and throws him inside where the referee is fine with opening the match despite Rowan taking a horrible beating which should be a DQ but that might make Big Show look weak and this is a Big Show tribute company after all.

Show stomps him down in the corner and plants him with a slam. More stomping sets up the chokeslam for the pin at 2:26. Why in the world did we need a Big Show squash? He beat Daniel Bryan on Raw and now he needs to win a squash? Oh wait, it’s more Survivor Series fallout. Why didn’t I see that coming?

Cameron vs. Paige

The Bellas are on commentary and wearing sunglasses, which actually fit them quite well. Cameron flips her hair at Paige to start and gets the revolving elbows in the corner for her efforts. Paige drives knees into the chest and does her shout on the apron to no reaction from the Bellas. Apparently Nikki is fierce. Good to know. Cameron comes back with her horrible offense and slaps Paige in the face, earning her a series of clotheslines. A kick to the face sets up the PTO for the submission at 2:09.

Paige shouts at the Bellas post match. They were actually far easier to sit through here as they’ve turned up the obnoxious levels to make it more of a character than just half doing everything and coming off like catty teenagers at summer camp. Naturally Nikki is going to retain the title Sunday though, because Paige has won every match leading up to the showdown and the Bellas are evil, meaning they have to get the upper hand.

We recap Goldust and Stardust’s issues with Dusty on Monday.

Stardust knows what it’s like to be considered a freak, so he embraced Stardust. They were on fire as a team and won the Tag Team Titles, but then darkness crept in. He saw it coming because it happened to him, and it took Cody away from him. Now Stardust is a cancer eating Cody alive and he wants his brother back. That means he has to face his brother and beat him at Fast Lane. Stardust appears on the screen behind him and asks to be spared from Goldust’s sentiments. After Sunday, Cody won’t be the only one who has ceased to exist. The universe will forget the name of Goldust.

Jimmy Uso vs. Tyson Kidd

Before the match, Kidd says his decision to team with Cesaro is the best move he’s ever made. Natalya’s face is rather amusing to say the least. Also of note here: Kidd is about a foot shorter than Cesaro. I’ve never noticed that kind of a height difference before. Kidd fires off ROH style forearms to the head to start but Jimmy comes back with right hands in the corner. Not that it matters though as Rusev comes in to beat up both guys at 0:57.

Rusev destroys everyone and rants in Russian about Cena. No Lana here.

Seth Rollins vs. Dolph Ziggler

The Stooges are barred from ringside. Feeling out process to start with both guys going for arm holds and Rollins bailing to the ropes. They hit the mat with Ziggler caught in a headlock but he comes back with a nice dropkick. Rollins avoids a Stinger Splash though and we take a break. Back with Ziggler fighting out of a chinlock (as is almost always the case) but charging into a hot shot for two.

Big Show, Kane, Ryback and Rowan are all at ringside. After what happened earlier, why would you want Rowan out there? Isn’t there an elderly music teacher somewhere that could give you a better fighting chance? Rollins yells at Ryback and Rowan, allowing Dolph to come back with a running forearm to put both guys down.

Now the Stinger Splash connects and Ziggler follows it up with a neckbreaker. Rollins tries the buckle bomb but gets countered into a sunset flip, followed by the Fameasser for two more. Dolph dropkicks him out to the floor where Seth slaps Ryback and Rowan. Back in and Ziggler has to fight off Kane, allowing Rollins to hit the buckle bomb, followed by the Curb Stomp for the pin at 10:23.

Rating: B-. Solid enough match here but it’s nothing we haven’t seen them do far better before. Rollins getting a big win is a good sign and I’d assume there’s going to be a six man tag set up for Sunday. If nothing else it would fill out the card a bit and get us beyond six matches for the show. Oh and a big talk, because that’s what I want to pay for: a preview for the next show.

The Stooges come out and it’s time for the big beatdown. Given that Ziggler is done and Rowan is Rowan, it’s basically Ryback getting destroyed, making a decent comeback and then getting destroyed again for the last three minutes of the show, because the Stooges were able to subdue Rowan and we’re still doing the same things we did around Survivor Series time. So much for Kane and Big Show having issues I guess, unless something happens Sunday.

Overall Rating: C-. Now this felt like an alternative to Raw. Monday night tends to be about packing as much stuff as you can into a show, but at the same time it feels like they’re stalling for time. This show flies by with some decent wrestling and VERY few stories. Smackdown is much more streamlined and makes it an easier show to sit through.

However, that doesn’t make it an interesting show. Nothing happens on this show and it was pure false hope when it moved back to Thursdays. This is right back to the same stuff they did for years and there’s no real reason to watch it. Yeah there was some mild storyline development here, but it’s more like the downloadable content for a video game: it might be fun to kill some time, but if you never saw it, you wouldn’t lose anything from the game itself.

Results

Daniel Bryan b. Miz – YES Lock

Ryback b. Kane – Shell Shock

R-Truth b. Bad News Barrett – Rollup

Ascension b. New Day – Fall of Man to Big E.

Roman Reigns b. Luke Harper – Spear

Big Show b. Erick Rowan – Chokeslam

Paige b. Cameron – PTO

Jimmy Uso vs. Tyson Kidd went to a no contest when Rusev interfered

Seth Rollins b. Dolph Ziggler – Curb Stomp

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Saturday Night’s Main Event at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SATPVKW

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6