Monday Night Raw – January 15, 2018: Smart Booking and Delicious Looking Chocolate Cake

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 15, 2018
Location: AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T.

It’s the go home show for the Raw 25th Anniversary Show which is the go home show for the Royal Rumble. That makes tonight almost the go home show for the pay per view, as next week’s show is going to have a completely different vibe. Tonight we have Asuka vs. Nia Jax so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Brock Lesnar fighting Braun Strowman last week until Strowman pulled a huge piece of the set down onto Lesnar and Kane. That’s quite the visual, but both Brock and Kane being conscious after a commercial hurt things a lot.

Here’s Strowman to get things going. He has a short story for us but it has a happy ending. Before he can get to his story though, Kurt Angle, flanked by security, cuts him off. Angle lists off all the obvious problems with what Braun did but Strowman says it could have been worse. Kurt gets in the always dumb sounding “unsafe worried environment” line with Strowman saying he did his job.

Strowman is ready to do whatever he wants and if that means ripping the walls off of Suplex City, so be it. Angle says Strowman is lucky Kane and Lesnar can still compete at the Rumble. As for Strowman though, he’s out of the match because HE’S FIRED. I’m not even going to bother getting all annoyed here because there’s no way they’ll do Kane vs. Lesnar as a one on one. Hardcore Holly was a more interesting (and believable) challenger back in 2004.

In the back, Braun leaves while threatening security.

Raw moment: Hugh Jackman is guest host.

Post break, a security guard orders Strowman to leave and the destruction is on. Braun promises to do even more.

The Bar vs. Titus Worldwide

Rematch from last week where Titus scored a fluke pin. Dana Brooke is in a very different top this week to prevent another instance of last week’s, uh, incident. Cesaro powers Crews into the corner to start but it’s quickly off to Titus for an exchange of chops in the corner. Cesaro uppercuts Crews down though and Sheamus adds a top rope clothesline as we take a break.

Back with Sheamus getting two off a middle rope ax handle and grabbing a chinlock on Crews. Apollo fights up and brings in Titus for the forearms to the chest and an impressive toss to Cesaro. Everything breaks down and Crews moonsaults to the floor just like last week but Cesaro is ready for him this time. An uppercut to Titus knocks him into a rollup for two, only to have the Neutralizer broken up. Apollo’s high crossbody and standing moonsault get two each but Sheamus picks him up for White Noise. Cue Jason Jordan for a distraction though, allowing Crews to roll Sheamus up for the pin at 10:48.

Rating: C-. Now that’s the right call, even if the ending didn’t need Jordan out there. I was nearly convinced that they would go with the 50/50 booking here but instead, they gave Titus Worldwide another win to make them even the slightest level players in the division. Now, even if they lose for weeks to come, there’s a more believable chance they could win and that’s what matters most. Good idea here, even in a not great match.

Seth Rollins comes out to ask Jordan what he’s doing.

Strowman kicks in the door to Angle’s office and breaks a lot of stuff.

Post break, Strowman wrecks catering and chokeslams Curt Hawkins through a table. He does however take a piece of chocolate cake from a nearly catatonic worker. I can appreciate a man with a taste for some cake and Strowman as the unstoppable monster is fun.

Tony Nese vs. Cedric Alexander

Before the match, Enzo Amore says he’s like Frankenstein and Cedric is like Dracula because he sucks. Goldust is in Cedric’s corner and says Cedric is a box office smash. After the title match at the Rumble, the one word to describe Cedric will be champion. Cedric says that between Amore’s face and his ankle, the only word to describe him is sawft. We’re joined in progress after a break, but not before seeing Strowman shoving a dumpster through the back.

That’s one thing that drives me crazy about WWE. Strowman is supposed to be destroying everything on a rampage, but he does it right after we get back from a commercial and before we get to this match. Go split screen to show him doing this at the same time or something, but find a way to make it feel more spontaneous.

Anyway, to the match. Cedric catches him with an ankle scissors but Nese knees him in the ribs as Booker talks about how Angle shouldn’t have fired Strowman live in the ring. We hit the neck crank on Cedric with Enzo talking so much trash that Goldust goes after him, even mocking the dance. Cedric fights up and hits the springboard clothesline for two, only to get slowed down by a headlock. Back up and Cedric elbow shim in the face, followed by the Lumbar Check (with a great sell job from Tony) for the pin at 5:52.

Rating: D+. Who in the world decided to put these two out there to die like this? The longer we wait on Cedric to get his big title shot, the less interesting he becomes. He’s beaten up all these same cruiserweights over and over and there’s no point in watching him do anything other than win the title. It wouldn’t surprise me to see WWE not even do that though, which would be one of the dumbest things they could do. Just find some more interesting villains for him to vanquish or give him the title already because this was a waste of time.

Angle is thinking about calling in a SWAT team but is told Strowman is heading towards the production trucks.

Post break Strowman goes into the truck and shoves a bunch of papers around before leaving without causing too much damage. The whole thing starts shaking though as Strowman has unhooked the semi from the truck and is trying to turn it over. Angle comes up to say he’s called the cops. His phone rings as Strowman leaves, only to come back and flip the truck over with the camera going spastic with cuts to hide how fake it looked, making it look worse in the process.

Strowman heads into the arena and goes after commentary, picking Cole up by one hand and carrying him over the stage. Angle and security shows up with Kurt saying he’s called the cops off. Stephanie has rehired Strowman and he’s back in the title match (because of course Stephanie can solve any problem in ten seconds while it’s caused Angle problems for an hour) if he lets Cole go. Braun does let him go, with a flying toss off the stage and onto the security guards. The Stephanie thing made me roll my eyes but Cole being picked up by the belt and carried away like a child was funny stuff.

Tom Phillips replaces Cole on commentary.

Nia Jax vs. Asuka

Asuka gets tossed around to start but comes right back with a Black Widow (ala AJ Lee) into something like an abdominal stretch. Nia calmly shoves Asuka’s leg off though and catches her with a backbreaker. A triangle choke cuts Nia off again until she lifts Asuka up for a powerbomb into the corner as we take a break. Back with Asuka fighting out of a bearhug and avoiding a sitdown splash. Asuka’s running kick to the chest drops Jax but she’s right back up with a hard powerbomb. Asuka grabs a kneebar to send Nia bailing to the ropes and they head outside. Asuka avoids a charge and sends Nia into the steps, only to have Nia get her knee caught between the ring and the steps. Nia beats the count back in but the referee stops it due to the knee injury at 10:45.

Rating: C. I’ve seen clowns who slip on banana peels less frequently than Nia Jax. It’s like she loses every match she has this way and that’s getting old. The match was a shortened version of what we’ve seen from these two every single time now with Asuka hanging in there and finding a way to survive. This was fine, but Nia needs to win something like NOW, as she still doesn’t have a big win.

Alexa Bliss comes out to check on Nia.

Jason Jordan comes in to see Angle, who is still upset over Braun. Jordan has been watching his dad’s back all night and wouldn’t have let Strowman do anything. He thanks Angle for the opportunities again but thinks Seth needs a warmup for next week. Say against Finn Balor tonight, which Angle makes for later.

The announcers talk about Martin Luther King Day.

Video on Martin Luther King.

Bliss blames herself for Nia’s injury when Enzo comes in to check on Nia as well. Nia tells Bliss that Enzo has this so Alexa leaves while not looking happy.

Revival vs. ???/???

Yes it’s an old school squash against nameless jobbers. Dawson suplexes jobber #1 and gives hi a hard clothesline for good measure. Dash comes in with a jumping knee to the face before sending it off to jobber #2. In a cool spot, Revival loads up #2 for something like a Snapshot (elevated DDT) but Dash flips him up like a backdrop, only to have Dawson send him forward in a gordbuster. The Shatter Machine ends #1 at 1:39. There’s something so great about jobbers not even having names because they’re not important enough.

Post match Revival brags about their tag team skills because too many people are worried about Instagram likes or video games. As for next week, Revival isn’t thrilled with meeting any of the veterans at Raw 25 because there’s nothing old school about beer bashes and crotch chops. They’re professional wrestlers instead of sports entertainers so WWE doesn’t want them to succeed. Next week at Raw 25, the superstars from around the world are coming to their universe and the Revival is setting the tone for the next 25 years. Good promo here but as always: FOLLOW UP ON IT.

Here’s Elias for a new song. He’s looking forward to the Royal Rumble but wants to eliminate Cena, along with 29 others. So he’s going to pull a Mil Mascaras and eliminate himself? Elias insults the San Antonio Spurs and introduces Miz and the Miztourage for a chat before their match.

Miz talks about the fans cheering him last week because they recognize greatness. The fans knew something was missing from Raw and it wasn’t Cena or Lesnar but rather Miz. Last week Miz and the Miztourage beat up Roman Reigns and it felt awesome. That spark is why he and Maryse are getting their own series on USA and next week he’s getting the Intercontinental Title back. It’s going to feel awesome. Maybe it’s just because he hasn’t been around lately but Miz has felt like a bigger deal in the last two weeks.

Roman Reigns vs. Miztourage

Non-title. Miz offers an early distraction to no avail as Reigns punches both lackeys down. Axel’s cheap shot allows the Miztourage to send Reigns into the steps and the beating is on. We hit the chinlock for a good while until Axel has to save his partner from a suplex. Instead Dallas gets two off a DDT, followed by some double teaming to keep Reigns slowed down.

Reigns fights up and hits a Samoan drop, followed by knocking Dallas off the apron. We get the always stupid spot of someone accidentally DDTing his partner with Axel getting spiked. The Superman Punch drops both guys and Miz’s distraction fails, allowing Reigns to spear Axel for the pin at 8:16.

Rating: D-. This was reaching new levels of boring as it really didn’t need to be even half this long. Reigns isn’t threatened by these two and there was little reason to have him be in this kind of trouble. Throw in Reigns being down after five minutes of offense from Axel and Dallas and this was a combination of really boring and unbelievable, in the completely wrong way.

Sasha Banks vs. Sonya Deville

The rest of Absolution, Bayley and Mickie James are at ringside. As we get started, Paige is officially ruled out of the Royal Rumble. Nothing is mentioned beyond that though. A very early Bank Statement attempt send Deville bailing to the ropes but Mandy offers a distraction so Sonya can get in a few shots.

We hit a chinlock with a body vice as Booker compares Sonya to Ken Shamrock in a rare name drop. Banks fights up and goes to the middle rope, only to dive into a kick to the chest for the completely clean pin at 2:26. That’s exactly the way this needed to go. Oh and welcome to the doghouse Sasha. Bayley can keep you company (for whatever reason).

Some wrestlers were at the National Civil Rights Museum last week.

Rollins tells Jordan to calm down and stop trying to be his spokesperson. This story hasn’t been bad but my levels of not caring whenever either of them show up is growing in a hurry.

Matt Hardy vs. Heath Slater

Joined in progress with Matt hitting a splash to Slater’s back and hammering away. Matt sends him into the ropes and laughs a lot so Slater heads outside for a meeting with Rhyno. Back in and Matt bites the hand before launching Slater into the corner. Matt thinks Slater must be deleted so it’s the ten rams into the buckle and a Twist of Fate for the pin at 3:37.

Rating: D+. Matt is changing his style up enough and that’s the best thing that could happen for him. He wasn’t really getting far with the nostalgia run so let’s see what he can do with this character. Unfortunately I’m not sure what exactly he can do with it but maybe he’ll surprise me like he did in TNA.

Goldberg is official for the Hall of Fame so it’s time for a long video package.

We look back at Strowman’s path of destruction earlier tonight.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Finn Balor vs. Seth Rollins

Jordan, Gallows and Anderson are at ringside. Balor armbars him to start but gets armdragged away, followed by a kick to the back. Seth gets sent outside though and a kick to the chest puts him down as we take a break. Back (after a Raw moment of the 1-2-3 Kid pinning Razor Ramon in a huge upset) with Rollins hitting the Blockbuster but hurting his knee. It’s fine enough to try the suicide dive though and Balor is down again.

They get back inside with Rolling hitting a forearm to the back but having Balor slip out of the Falcon Arrow. The Sling Blade takes Rollins down, only to have Seth come back with his own. Balor gets in another Sling Blade but charges into a superkick for two. I really wouldn’t emphasize how they both use the same move like that but have it their way. The Wind-Up knee is countered with a forearm so Rollins enziguris him down. Seth has to roll through the Phoenix splash and gets caught with the shotgun dropkick in the corner.

The Coup de Grace is broken up with the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two more and both guys are down. Seth’s frog splash hits the knees though and Balor rolls him up for….two apparently but here’s the Bar to interrupt. The brawl is on at ringside with Anderson and Gallows fighting the Bar until Balor hits a flip dive to take all four out. Another kick to the head sets up the Coup de Grace but Rollins rolls away. Cesaro’s distraction allows Jordan to trip Balor and Rollins hits the curb stomp (WHERE IN THE WORLD HAS THAT BEEN???) for the pin at 15:18.

Rating: C+. Seth’s eternally present knee selling issues aside, this was the kind of main event match that always works. They were pushing the idea of the messed up fall quite a bit here and that leads me to think we’re heading for a rematch. I’m really not sure about the idea of Balor losing so soon after his renewed push but that’s WWE for you.

Balor is rather shaken up and the camera stays on him for a long time to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show started off great with Strowman running wild but they made sure to cut that off after an hour because it was getting too interesting. It felt like an hour of one show and two hours of the regular show, which kind of feels like a warmup for next week’s show. This show had some good booking choices (Deville winning, Revival getting a squash win, Titus Worldwide winning again etc) but the wrestling wasn’t exactly thrilling. That being said, the next two weeks are all that matters so we’ll see what they really have to offer then.

Results

Titus Worldwide b. The Bar – Rollup to Sheamus

Cedric Alexander b. Tony Nese – Lumbar Check

Asuka b. Nia Jax via referee stoppage

Revival b. ???/??? – Shatter Machine

Roman Reigns b. Miztourage – Spear to Axel

Sonya Deville b. Sasha Banks – Kick to the chest

Matt Hardy b. Heath Slater – Twist of Fate

Seth Rollins b. Finn Balor – Blackout

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Main Event – January 11, 2018: Yeah I Knew That

Main Event
Date: January 11, 2018
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Nigel McGuinness, Vic Joseph

What does it say that we’re less than a week removed from the most recent episodes of Monday Night Raw and Smackdown Live and I can barely remember what happened? We’re building towards two of the biggest shows of the year and I’m drawing blanks on what went down. That’s not a great sign for either show and hopefully it’s not one for this show too. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Dana Brooke vs. Alicia Fox

Now Brooke beat Mickie James last week, which more or less guarantees that she loses here, just for the sake of the dumbest result possible. They take turns slamming each other down by the hair before Brooke grabs a waistlock. Back up and Fox tries a flying shoulder but bounces off of Brooke, who of course hits the pose.

Brooke tries a charge of her own but gets kicked out to the floor so Fox can take over. We hit the chinlock for a few seconds before the bridging northern lights gives Fox two. Dana clotheslines her a few times and tries the handspring elbow, only to flip into two raised boots. The ax kick gives Fox the pin at 5:45.

Rating: D. Yeah I knew that. Somehow, I just knew that was going to be the case. Brooke really isn’t that great in the ring but I still like her for some reason that I just can’t quite place. If she could reach a level of plain competence, she could be a nice little midcard fixture. Fox is the same person she’s been for years, which is to say acceptable and not much more.

From Raw for the first time.

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar to talk about old school. The thing is, this is a progressive industry where you need fresh ways to present the ideas to the audience and the general public. They’ve gotten away from the old school way of promoting a Universal Title match (oh come on), which was all about finding a challenger who could possibly pin or tap out a champion.

Now the Universal Title is marketed as how could Brock survive this time. Even Lesnar thinks it sucks. At the Rumble, it’s Brock vs. monster #1 and monster #2 but the only cliffhanger is who Lesnar will pin. Heyman knows no one can beat this man and that’s all that matters. Lesnar goes up the ramp but here’s Kane for the fight.

They fight into the back where Braun Strowman shows up and runs them both over. Brock is thrown into a wall where a big case falls on him. Strowman throws another case onto Kane (that is some scary power) before pulling out….a grappling hook? He attaches it to a big old piece of the set and pulls it down onto both guys for a huge crash, sending Heyman and everyone else behind him into fits of screams. That was quite the set piece and my goodness it should have killed them both. Worry not though, as I’m sure Lesnar will be just fine to lose to Reigns in New Orleans.

I know that’s harped on but it’s the problem with the entire Universal Title picture. Why should I even possibly buy that Strowman, who Lesnar has already beaten, or Kane (because HA) is going to take the title at the Rumble? Even if they do, there’s no way they’re defending it at Wrestlemania because that’s Reigns’ spot and everyone knows it. I know it sounds lame but that’s what goes through my head every time I see anything related to the title.

Post break, Brock was taken out on a stretcher while Kane was allowed to walk away on his own. Well limp away but you get the idea. Lesnar didn’t want to go to the hospital but went anyway.

Recap of Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon’s recent issues on Smackdown.

From Smackdown.

AJ Styles/Shinsuke Nakamura/Randy Orton vs. Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn

The threat of an RKO sends Owens bailing to the floor before coming back in for some right hands. It’s off to Sami vs. Nakamura as the announcers talk about the Freebird Rule for the potential of co-WWE Champions. A kick to the face sends Sami outside and an attempt at the Styles Clash sends the villains walking up the ramp.

Cue Shane, because we haven’t seen him enough tonight. The match is restarted (it never stopped) with no countouts. Back from a break with AJ fighting Owens off and hitting the fireman’s carry backbreaker. The hot tag brings in Orton for the snap powerslam on Zayn, followed by the hanging DDT. Orton loads up the RKO but Owens chairs him in the ribs for the DQ at….oh of course Shane comes out to say restart it with No DQ.

AJ knocks Owens up the ramp and into the back with a chair, leaving Sami trapped. The chase is on but Sami can’t quite make it over the barricade. Orton loads up the steps and then drops Sami back first onto the announcers’ table. Kinshasa drops Zayn and the RKO is good for the pin at 14:54.

Rating: D+. What do you want me to say here? The good guys had a big advantage and used that advantage to win, including a pair of restarts in the process. This was everything you would have guessed the match would be and really didn’t deviate from that premise. There’s not much these guys can do when EVERYTHING in this story has been about Shane vs. Bryan, which at the moment can’t be an actual match. I’m still begging for the big swerve where it’s Shane as the heel, but that’s getting more and more unlikely with each passing week for reasons I don’t want to understand.

Ariya Daivari/Drew Gulak vs. Mustafa Ali/Akira Tozawa

Gulak and Tozawa start things off with Drew demanding no chanting. Instead Tozawa kicks him down for the jumping backsplash and it’s off to the arm. Daivari makes a blind tag though and jumps Tozawa from behind as we take a break. Back with Daivari’s frog splash getting two on Ali. Everything breaks down in short order (without a hot tag either), allowing Tozawa to hit his suicide dive on Daivari. The 054 ends Gulak at 8:22.

Rating: C. I’m running out of ways to say “they did the same thing they always do” in these cruiserweight matches but that’s the case here again. This was every bit out of the old 205 Live playbook with a completely standard tag match (not a bad thing) and nothing we haven’t seen time after time. It could have been worse, which often times is the best thing that can be said about a match.

Quick look at the US Title tournament.

Royal Rumble rundown.

We see a little bit of Miz’s return on Raw.

From Raw to close things up.

Balor Club vs. Roman Reigns/Seth Rollins/Jason Jordan

Balor and Rollins start things off with Balor scoring off an early double stomp. It’s off to Anderson in a hurry but Reigns tags himself in so house can be cleaned in a hurry, including a double shoulder to Balor. Back from a break with Reigns working over Balor until a Sling Blade cuts him off. Gallows and Anderson take over in the corner with Luke grabbing a chinlock. Anderson drops a knee and puts on a chinlock of his own.

Back up and Reigns gets in a clothesline to drop Anderson but Gallows won’t give up the hot tag. The third chinlock goes on but Reigns no sells a big boot and scores with a Superman Punch. The hot tag brings in Rollins for the Blockbuster, followed by a Sling Blade on Anderson. Gallows breaks up the Wind-Up knee and Anderson’s spinebuster gets two.

Rollins makes the tag to Reigns but Jordan distracts the referee by mistake so Rollins stays legal. A Magic Killer plants Rollins so Reigns goes outside to fight two on one. Jordan tries to help Rollins up, allowing Balor to hit the shotgun dropkick. The Coup de Grace gives Balor the pin at 15:28.

Rating: C-. The chinlockery hurt this a lot but I’m not sure anyone was expecting this to be any more than another wedge between Jordan and company, which is all it needed to be. That team isn’t going to hold together that much longer and it makes sense to have them split up just in time for the Rumble.

Post match Miz and the Miztourage come in to attack Rollins, Jordan and Reigns. Roman takes a Skull Crushing Finale and the TripleBomb to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Yeah there’s a reason I didn’t remember anything from this week. This was a run of the mill show and the highlights really didn’t offer anything of note. That’s part of the problem with the build to the Rumble: once everything is set, there’s really not much to do other than sit around and wait on the show. Raw 25 will help that a lot, but it’s not like there’s anything overly interesting on this week’s shows.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – January 8, 2018: THEY’RE NOT EVEN PAYING ATTENTION!

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 8, 2018
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T.

The big story this week is the return of the Miz, but at the same time we need to have someone to challenge Roman Reigns for the Intercontinental Title now that Samoa Joe has been vanquished. I think you might be getting where I’m hinting: Finn Balor with the Club challenges Reigns for the title. I’ve heard of less interesting ideas. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks back at Reigns defeating Samoa Joe last week. I’m still not sure if that’s the right call.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Reigns for the opening chat. Reigns is surprised that Joe came in so unprepared last week because Roman was fighting for his brother Dean Ambrose. If you mess with one member of the Shield, you mess with all of them. Cue Jason Jordan of all people to say that he feels like something special. After ignoring the YOU BOTH SUCK chants, Jordan implies that he’s part of the Shield now and even does the fist.

This brings out Seth Rollins to say Jordan’s timing is horrible. It’s made clear that he’s not part of the Shield but Jordan says they can fight anyone. Jordan thinks they’re pretty good despite not being the Shield, but Reigns and Rollins aren’t convinced. Neither are Finn Balor and the Club, who interrupt next. They talk about their history together, which started way before Jordan even knew who his daddy was.

Then they came here and did their own thing, all with success. The thing is, they all knew they would come together to take over. They get in the ring with Balor saying this is the year of Balor Club. Jordan laughs them off and says he’d rather be in the Champions’ Club. Gallows calls him a NERD so Jordan goes after him, only to quickly be calmed down. Kurt Angle comes out to make the six man main event. Jordan as the misfit works very well here, but I’m not sure where it goes. Balor vs. Reigns could be some good stuff too, especially if it makes me look smart.

Little Mix is doing the Royal Rumble theme song. That would be an all girl band that my fifteen year old cousin loves. Are they that out of band ideas?

Bayley/Sasha Banks vs. Mandy Rose/Sonya Deville

Mickie James, now official for the Rumble, and Paige are at ringside. Bayley and Mandy get things going with Mandy pulling her down by the hair. Back up and Bayley shoves her out to the floor as the announcers talk about the Rumble (fair enough in this case). We take a break and come back with Sasha hitting the running double knees for two on Mandy.

Sonya offers a distraction though and a good looking jumping knee drops Banks. A comeback is cut off by some hard, rapid right hands to the ribs in one of the first instances of Sonya looking like an MMA fighter for a change. A double clothesline gives Sasha a breather but Mandy breaks up another hot tag attempt. Everything breaks down and the Bank Statement makes Mandy tap at 10:57.

Rating: C-. Pretty standard women’s match here and that’s all it needed to be. They’re keeping Paige looking strong, which is the most important thing they can do at the moment. Mandy and Sonya are just going to be cannon fodder in the Rumble anyway so having Bayley and Sasha get a win over them helps people who need the help and doesn’t harm people who wouldn’t be hurt anyway.

We look back at the ending of last week’s show with Brock Lesnar and Kane brawling.

We look at Cedric Alexander and Goldust teaming up last week.

Goldust is dressed like Mickey from Rocky and gives Cedric one of Mickey’s speeches. Cedric says he has it because he’s fired up enough to win the title tonight. Goldust says the one thing standing in Cedric’s way is Cedric himself. The voice makes Goldust cough before he says tonight is all about Cedric.

Earlier today, Goldust was doing a time lapse video of putting on his makeup when he found out that Alicia Fox will be his partner for the Mixed Match Challenge.

Matt Hardy vs. Curt Hawkins

Before the match, Matt officially enters the Rumble. Matt has his full on Broken entrance, complete with a theme song talking about being Broken. Hawkins tries an armbar but Matt bites his way to freedom. A snap German suplex into the corner has Hawkins in trouble and a missed middle rope crossbody makes things even worse for him. The Side Effect into the Twist of Fate is enough to end Hawkins at 1:55. Matt looked different enough to make the character feel different, which is a good sign for his future.

Post match Bray Wyatt appears behind Matt and a laugh off ensues. Nothing physical goes down.

Here’s Elias with something to sing. The fans boo his guitar playing but Elias says it was good. He’s got a song about Memphis and Elvis but the fans don’t seem too thrilled with him. Elias: “What’s wrong with Elvis???”. He doesn’t care about Elvis though because there’s a star on the way who is taking over the entertainment biz. Elias: “Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the Miz.” Nice rhyme there.

The Miz, with the Miztourage, is back and ready to brag about his recent accomplishment. The fans welcome him back (along with his much taller hair) but Miz wants to thank the Miztourage for holding things up while he was gone. Dallas says Miz makes every day Mizmas and Dallas thinks having him back feels like winning the Mizzies every single day. Bo even has a present for Miz: a framed photo of Miz himself. Dallas: “It’s going to be hard to get to sleep without that tonight.” Miz: “….what?”

Axel has his own present: the suit jacket that he’s wearing! Dallas offers his watch and Axel tries his shoes but Miz tells them both to sit down. Miz brags about his 2017 and promises to make it even bigger this year. We see a clip of Shield TripleBombing Miz through a table to put him on the shelf two months ago, which of course requires revenge.

Miz says the champion makes the title and daddy is home. In 2018, he’s celebrating the birth of his daughter and become the greatest Intercontinental Champion of all time. He’s back for the title and you can believe that. This was the most serious Miz has been on the main roster in a long time and it feels like he’s been elevated a bit, which is long overdue.

Balor Club tries to talk strategy for tonight but Anderson and Gallows would rather make Japan references. They agree to make 2018 the year of Balor Club.

Cruiserweight Title: Enzo Amore vs. Cedric Alexander

Enzo is defending. Before the match, Enzo talks about missing last week’s show but being taken care of by Nia Jax. Last week he was in the hospital and watched the show, which included the Zo Train facing Cedric and Goldust. Then Enzo got it: they were teaming so Cedric can get close to gold, because he’s not winning the title.

Cedric drops him with a single right hand, followed by a kick to the head to really drop Enzo. We see Nia Jax watching in the back as Enzo is pulled away from the ropes to keep Enzo in trouble. Enzo knocks him off the top in a heap though and Cedric is holding his back as we take a break.

Back with Enzo grabbing a chinlock but getting dropkicked out of the air for his efforts. Cedric fights back with some clotheslines followed by the Neuralizer. Another kick sets up a big flip dive but Enzo comes up screaming about his ankle. He’s busted open too as the trainer comes over to check on him but that’s a countout at 8:50.

Rating: D+. He better have a broken ankle at this point as it would get the title off of him. It’s good to have the title match over and Cedric is likely to get a rematch, but they desperately need something fresh in this division. There’s only so much you can do with waiting on another title match for so long but at the same time you can’t have Enzo actually wrestle that often because there’s nothing he can do in the ring.

Post break Enzo is in the trainer’s room when Nia comes to check on him.

Angle is on the phone with some legendary female wrestler about a spot in the Rumble but has to go when the Bar comes in. They want their rematch for the titles and aren’t happy with the six man tag main event. Sheamus claims favoritism but Angle makes the title match at the Rumble. That’s cool with them and Angle gives them a match against some surprise competition tonight. The two of them leave and Miz comes in to brag about his upcoming reality series along with Maryse. Miz wants his rematch for the Intercontinental Title at the 25th anniversary of Raw. Angle thinks it’s a good idea and the match is set.

Earlier today, Miz found out that Asuka will be his partner for the Mixed Match Challenge.

Alexa Bliss comes in to see Asuka and threatens her with Nia Jax. It’s as short as it sounds.

The Bar vs. Titus Worldwide

Sheamus knocks Titus around to start before it’s off to Crews for a dropkick on Cesaro. The standing moonsault gets two but Apollo is sent outside, seeming to bang up his knee in the process. Back in and Sheamus grabs a wristlock as Dana Brooke plays cheerleader. Crews gets over for the tag and the beatdown continues as everything breaks down. Apollo dodges a Brogue Kick by moonsaulting onto Cesaro, allowing Titus to roll Sheamus up for the pin at 5:30.

Rating: D. Uh, sure? I’m glad to see Crews getting a win for once but this feels like a way to have Sheamus and Cesaro come back and crush them in a rematch as we get closer to the Rumble. The match was nothing to see as it was all about the surprise, which certainly worked, though I’m not exactly ready to put Titus Worldwide in the title hunt.

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar to talk about old school. The thing is, this is a progressive industry where you need fresh ways to present the ideas to the audience and the general public. They’ve gotten away from the old school way of promoting a Universal Title match (oh come on), which was all about finding a challenger who could possibly pin or tap out a champion.

Now the Universal Title is marketed as how could Brock survive this time. Even Lesnar thinks it sucks. At the Rumble, it’s Brock vs. monster #1 and monster #2 but the only cliffhanger is who Lesnar will pin. Heyman knows no one can beat this man and that’s all that matters. Lesnar goes up the ramp but here’s Kane for the fight.

They fight into the back where Braun Strowman shows up and runs them both over. Brock is thrown into a wall where a big case falls on him. Strowman throws another case onto Kane (that is some scary power) before pulling out….a grappling hook? He attaches it to a big old piece of the set and pulls it down onto both guys for a huge crash, sending Heyman and everyone else behind him into fits of screams. That was quite the set piece and my goodness it should have killed them both. Worry not though, as I’m sure Lesnar will be just fine to lose to Reigns in New Orleans.

I know that’s harped on but it’s the problem with the entire Universal Title picture. Why should I even possibly buy that Strowman, who Lesnar has already beaten, or Kane (because HA) is going to take the title at the Rumble? Even if they do, there’s no way they’re defending it at Wrestlemania because that’s Reigns’ spot and everyone knows it. I know it sounds lame but that’s what goes through my head every time I see anything related to the title.

Post break, Brock was taken out on a stretcher while Kane was allowed to walk away on his own. Well limp away but you get the idea. Lesnar didn’t want to go to the hospital but went anyway.

Samoa Joe vs. Rhyno

Joe starts fast with an enziguri in the corner and a headbutt cuts off Rhyno’s comeback. More right hands give Rhyno a breather until an STO cuts him off. A running big boot into the backsplash gives Joe two, followed by the Koquina Clutch to make Rhyno tap at 2:44. Short and to the point with Joe looking dominant, as he should.

Post match Joe says he’s taken years off of Reigns’ career and the cracks are starting to show. When everything comes crashing down, he’ll be there to pick up the pieces. As for now though, he’s entering the Royal Rumble. Joe is ready for everyone, including John Cena, which is a name that he’ll never forget.

Alexa sucks up to Nia again, this time saying that Enzo might be holding her back. Nia says Enzo motivates her to be a champion so she’s entering the Royal Rumble. She’s Alexa’s favorite to win but thinks Nia should take Asuka out first. Nia doesn’t buy it but Alexa stays on the “Asuka is talking about you” train. Nia: “CAN IT BLISS!”

Alexa whispers something that Asuka said in Nia’s ear and Nia can’t believe Asuka said that….because Asuka doesn’t speak English and Bliss doesn’t speak Japanese. If you ignore the times that Asuka has spoken English, there’s nothing wrong with this segment. Like, EARLIER TONIGHT WHEN SHE TALKED TO MIZ ABOUT THE MIXED MATCH CHALLENGE FOR EXAMPLE!!!

Announced for the 25th anniversary show: Steve Austin! Ric Flair! The Undertaker! Shawn Michaels! THE BELLA TWINS!

Asuka comes out for a match but Nia shows up and lays her out.

Royal Rumble card rundown.

Asuka vs. Nia is set for next week.

Balor Club vs. Roman Reigns/Seth Rollins/Jason Jordan

Balor and Rollins start things off with Balor scoring off an early double stomp. It’s off to Anderson in a hurry but Reigns tags himself in so house can be cleaned in a hurry, including a double shoulder to Balor. Back from a break with Reigns working over Balor until a Sling Blade cuts him off. Gallows and Anderson take over in the corner with Luke grabbing a chinlock. Anderson drops a knee and puts on a chinlock of his own.

Back up and Reigns gets in a clothesline to drop Anderson but Gallows won’t give up the hot tag. The third chinlock goes on but Reigns no sells a big boot and scores with a Superman Punch. The hot tag brings in Rollins for the Blockbuster, followed by a Sling Blade on Anderson. Gallows breaks up the Wind-Up knee and Anderson’s spinebuster gets two.

Rollins makes the tag to Reigns but Jordan distracts the referee by mistake so Rollins stays legal. A Magic Killer plants Rollins so Reigns goes outside to fight two on one. Jordan tries to help Rollins up, allowing Balor to hit the shotgun dropkick. The Coup de Grace gives Balor the pin at 15:28.

Rating: C-. The chinlockery hurt this a lot but I’m not sure anyone was expecting this to be any more than another wedge between Jordan and company, which is all it needed to be. That team isn’t going to hold together that much longer and it makes sense to have them split up just in time for the Rumble.

Post match Miz and the Miztourage come in to attack Rollins, Jordan and Reigns. Roman takes a Skull Crushing Finale and the TripleBomb to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was a storytelling show and, aside from the part where they couldn’t remember the clip they aired earlier in the night where Asuka spoke English, they accomplished that goal. They’re getting stuff set up for both the big anniversary show (which could be a blast) and the Rumble (which should be a blast). The wrestling tonight wasn’t the point but that’s often the case around this time of year. Not a great show but one that did its job, which is often more important.

Results

Bayley/Sasha Banks b. Mandy Rose/Sonya Deville – Bank Statement to Rose

Matt Hardy b. Curt Hawkins – Twist of Fate

Cedric Alexander b. Enzo Amore via countout

Titus Worldwide b. The Bar – Rollup to Sheamus

Samoa Joe b. Rhyno – Koquina Clutch

Balor Club b. Roman Reigns/Jason Jordan/Seth Rollins – Coup de Grace to Rollins

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: The Reigns of Summer

Looking at Reigns’ potential Summerslam announced and what I think it’s going to be.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-reigns-summer/