No Mercy 2006 (2021 Redo): The Benefit Of Low Expectations

No Mercy 2006
Date: October 8, 2006
Location: RBC Arena, Raleigh, North Carolina
Attendance: 9,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re back to the pay per views and this time around it’s another pretty low level one with one of the weaker Smackdown shows. The main event, as of two days ago, is now a four way with King Booker defending his title against Finlay, Batista and Bobby Lashley. Other than that we have Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio in a Falls Count Anywhere match as the second biggest thing on the card. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the four way, with everyone saying it is time for no mercy. It’s not a good sign when there is nothing else to talk about.

Matt Hardy vs. Gregory Helms

Still non-title because the Cruiserweight Title still doesn’t matter. Helms is the hometown boy and Cole goes over their history and tries to put over the idea of the match being the battle of North Carolina. They fight over a headlock to start until Hardy shoulders him down. Matt’s takedown gives us back to back standouts as the fans are behind Hardy. Helms takes him into the corner and stomps away but Hardy is right back with a clothesline.

They head to the floor with Matt hitting a quick slingshot dive to take him out again. Back in and a neckbreaker into a backbreaker puts Hardy down and a super Russian legsweep gives Helms two. Helms grabs a Codebreaker for two more and it’s time to crank on the arm some more. Hardy fights up with a reverse DDT before winning the slugout to take over. Some clotheslines set up the bulldog out of the corner for two and the middle rope legdrop gets the same.

Helms comes back with a reverse Unprettier and then hits it twice more, only to get punched out of the air. Back to back to back Side Effects get two but Hardy’s moonsault hits knees. The Shining Wizard gets two so Hardy gets in a shot to the face and heads up top. That earns him a crotching and running Shining Wizard for two but Hardy is right back with the Twist of Fate for the quick pin.

Rating: B. This was a very nice surprise as I had no interest coming in and they had a heck of a match here. Ignoring everything about the title and how many times we have seen the match now, this was a rather good opener and I dug everything about it. Call it a hidden gem as this was one of the bigger surprises I have seen in a long time.

King Booker needs to focus but also tells William Regal that he needs help tonight. Regal is willing to help and is tasked with getting Finlay to help Booker in the four way. He’s up to the crusade.

Tag Team Titles: KC James/Idol Stevens vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick

London and Kendrick are defending and Michelle McCool/Ashley Massaro are here too. Stevens hammers London in the corner but London is right back with a headscissors. Kendrick comes in to crank on the arm as JBL actually compares London and Kendrick to the Simpson Brothers. It’s off to James, who is taken down with a double clothesline and the champs hit stereo dives to the floor.

Back in and McCool offers a distraction, allowing James to shove London off the top and put him in trouble. James hammers away and hands it back to Stevens for a double underhook crank on the mat. London breaks free and goes for the tag but Stevens pulls Kendrick to the floor. The second attempt works a bit better though and it’s Kendrick coming in to clean house.

London hits a dive onto Stevens, leaving James to superplex Kendrick down for a near fall. McCool offers a distraction so the illegal Stevens can hit a chokebreaker to give James two on Kendrick. London breaks up a double suplex and launches Kendrick for a double dropkick. Sliced Bread into a step up shooting star press finishes James to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. These guys work well together and London/Kendrick have turned into the latest awesome young high fliers. That’s the kind of thing that is always going to have a place in the wrestling world and they have looked great for a long time now. They could use some fresh competition but they have earned a spot on a pay per view like this one.

William Regal goes to find Finlay but finds Vito in a dress jumping rope (Regal: “You’re sweating like Vince McMahon in a church.”). Vito pulls up his dress to reveal the thong, freaking out Regal (who is jumping rope and singing London Bridge) and making him fall into the concession stand.

Teddy Long is in the ring with a cake and a huge birthday present for the birthday boy…..The Miz! Cue Miz, who shouts a lot of HOO-RAH’s, but Long has something for him: that would be Layla, who is barely concealing her rather limited clothing. She has Miz sit down and the lap dance is on, then blindfolds him (with Miz talking about whips and chains). Cue the most obvious payoff in the world, freaking Miz out as he sees who is dancing in front of him next. Layla and Big Dick Johnson dance together as Miz runs.

MVP vs. ???

This is MVP’s in-ring debut and he has the big inflatable tunnel for his entrance. Before the match, MVP talks about how great he is, though the fans chant POWER RANGER at his offense. The opponent is a rather skinny man named Marty Garner, who is slapped down before the bell. MVP takes him down and rides him a bit, followed by a snapmare of all things for two. The fans call this boring and MVP snaps a bit, setting up the yet to be named Playmaker for the fast pin. JBL really doesn’t seem to like him.

Regal is in a towel after the shower but Vito comes in to freak him out again. That sends Regal running off with the towel falling off. Teddy Long isn’t pleased and puts Regal in a match for later. This was a bit of a problem as Regal’s penis was accidentally exposed for a split second during the segment and WWE had to apologize.

We recap Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker. Kennedy isn’t scared of Undertaker’s power, as we put a completely fresh spin on an Undertaker feud.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker

Non-title and for some reason we wait about thirty seconds for the referee to ask if they are ready. Undertaker charges at him to start and sends the arm into the corner. That’s enough to send Kennedy outside for a breather so Undertaker sends the arm into the post this time. Back in and Old School is countered with an armdrag, which commentary is sure has never happened before.

Kennedy stomps away in the corner but walks into a Downward Spiral for two. Undertaker is knocked to the apron though and Kennedy drives him into the apron to take over again. Another shot knocks him off the apron again and a DDT out of the ropes catches Undertaker on the way back in. The running crotch attack to the back of the neck gets two and Kennedy slowly pounds on him.

Kennedy grabs a piledriver, which freaks commentary out, partially because they call it a Tombstone. That’s good for a pair of twos so it’s off to a chinlock to keep Undertaker in trouble. Undertaker is right back up to win the slugout and there’s the jumping clothesline. Snake Eyes into the big boot gets two but Kennedy grabs the referee to block the chokeslam.

Kennedy’s neckbreaker gets two but Undertaker is right back with the chokeslam for two. Back up and Kennedy sends him into the exposed buckle, setting up the Kenton Bomb for two more. Kennedy goes to get his title and leave but Undertaker takes it away and hits him for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was getting good until the fairly weak ending, but I will absolutely take that over a champion losing again. They could come back with a rematch in a few weeks, though it isn’t like the title is doing anything for Kennedy in the first place. Undertaker did give him a good bit here and that’s always nice to see when there is a chance to put someone over.

Post match Undertaker beats up the referee to blow off some steam.

We recap Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Chavo claimed that Rey was sponging off of the Guerrero name (fair) and cost him the World Title. The feud ensued and this time it’s Falls Count Anywhere.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Vickie Guerrero is here with Chavo and it is Falls Count Anywhere. Chavo elbows him down to start but Rey slips out of a rollup and hammers away. The EDDIE chants begin as they head up top and then both crash down for the double knockdown. That’s enough of the ring so they fight up to the entrance with Rey having to hurricanrana his way out of a powerbomb.

Rey knocks him into the barricade but is quickly Gory Bombed onto the same barricade to put them both down again. Chavo is draped over another barricade for a clothesline to the back of the head but Chavo sends him head first into some hockey boards for two. There’s a head first swing into a chair and it’s time to fight into the crowd.

Rey gets in a few shots to the face and runs off the barricade to hit the seated senton for two more. They fight towards the ring, with the camera being knocked around quite a bit each time. It’s finally into a bit of a clearing for a 619, setting up a crossbody off of a tunnel to give Rey the pin.

Rating: C-. This was only so good though they needed to have a more violent match/brawl like this one. Chavo is somehow managing to overcome a career that has not seen him as a major player for the most part so it was nice to see him working this well in such a role. That being said, it was a lot of walking around and punching, so they were only going to get so far.

Post match Vickie is REALLY not pleased.

William Regal vs. ???

The mystery opponent is….Chris Benoit, who is making a rather long awaited return. Benoit drives him into the corner to start so Regal start in on the arm. A headlock takeover has Regal down but Benoit fights up and wristlocks his way to freedom. Back up and the test of strength lets Regal bridge on his neck and then flip backwards, only to get caught in a bodyscissors.

Regal steps on the arm to get out so Benoit chops him into the rolling German suplexes. A headbutt busts them both open and Benoit’s Swan Dive gets two. They head to the apron to tease the super German suplex but Regal knocks him out to the floor instead. That’s fine with Benoit, who tries the Sharpshooter but gets kicked in the face for the block. Something like a hybrid dragon sleeper/abdominal stretch has Benoit in more trouble but he slips out and hammers on Regal’s cut.

Some suplexes send Benoit flying but the Regal Stretch attempt is countered into a Crossface attempt, which sends Regal to the ropes. Back up and Regal ties the legs up to put on a dragon sleeper for some hard neck cranking. That doesn’t last long as Benoit grabs a dragon suplex and puts on the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: B. These two beat each other up for a long while and it if had some more time, it could have been a classic. Benoit hasn’t missed a beat and I don’t think anyone was expecting anything else. These two have always worked very well together and they made it work here again. Heck of a match and it’s very nice to see Benoit back.

In the back, King Booker yells at Regal for not finding Finlay and doesn’t want to hear excuses. Finlay comes up to say he’s here to fight for the title so Booker yells at him as he leaves. Booker yells at Regal and tells him to get out, including a slap to the face. Regal drops him with one left hand.

We recap the main event. King Booker is World Champion and was scheduled to defend against Bobby Lashley. Then Teddy Long added Batista and Finlay to make it a four way earlier this week.

Batista and Bobby Lashley will see each other out there.

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Batista

Booker, with Queen Sharmell, is defending and it is one fall to a finish. Finlay gets knocked outside to start so Booker gets double teamed in the corner until Finlay runs back in for the save. Lashley is tossed as well, leaving Batista to take the double teaming for a change. Finlay and Batista head to the floor so Lashley comes back in with a spinebuster for two on Booker.

Batista takes Lashley’s place so Finlay and Booker double team him down again. An elbow to the face drops Batista but Finlay jumps Booker, sending JBL over the edge. Finlay sends him face first into the apron and then sits on his chest for two back inside. Batista comes back in and gets caught in a Fujiwara armbar. A Samoan drop doesn’t get Batista out of trouble though as Finlay switches to a keylock, followed by a half crab to Lashley.

That’s broken up as well and Booker kicks Finlay in the face for two. It’s Lashley up with a gorilla press gutbuster for two on Finlay. That draws out the Leprechaun for a low blow, setting up Finlay’s Shillelagh shot to Lashley. Batista is back in with a Jackhammer to Booker but has to knock Finlay down. We’re down to Batista vs. Lashley, with the former nailing a fast spear for two.

Batista is busted open off of what might have been an accidental collision so Lashley hits him with a spinebuster. Finlay pulls Batista to the floor, leaving Booker to grab the Book End for two on Lashley. A kick to the face gets two more but it’s Batista back in for spinebusters all around. The Batista Bomb hits Finlay but Lashley spears Batista, allowing Booker to pin Finlay to retain.

Rating: B-. It was a smart move to let them all get in there and do their things in shorter bursts than trying to have something coherent for all four of them. Booker retaining is fine, even if it seems pretty clear that he is just keeping the title war for Batista. This was a well put together match and they went with the best way out of it that they had available. Nice job here, especially for a match with about two days’ announcement.

Overall Rating: B. Where the heck did this come from? This was in and out in a hurry at just over two and a half hours with three very good matches included. WWE has a strong track record of surprises when it comes to shows like this, as the card looked terrible coming in. Maybe it is the lack of expectations but what we got here worked rather well and that was a great surprise.

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Smackdown – October 6, 2006: I’m Not Sure What Else They Can Do

Smackdown
Date: October 6, 2006
Location: Kansas Coliseum, Wichita, Kansas
Attendance: 5,585
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for No Mercy and I’m not sure what else there is to set up for the show. The card has been set in stone for a good while now and while there are still a few things that could be firmed up, everything else is ready. Hopefully they keep the interest up, though a boost would certainly help things out a lot. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

King Booker, with Queen Sharmell, is ready to make Bobby Lashley pick Batista as his poison tonight.

Bobby Lashley is cool with that and picks Finlay as Booker’s poison. No matter what happens though, nothing changes for Sunday.

Rey Mysterio/Matt Hardy vs. Gregory Helms/Chavo Guerrero

Take two feuds and mix them together. Vickie Guerrero is here with Chavo. Rey wants Chavo to start but gets Helms instead, meaning it’s quickly off to Hardy to hammer away. A springboard ax handle to Helms’ shoulder connects but he spinebusters Rey down to take over. Now Chavo is willing to come in for a few cheap shots before handing it back to Helms. That means a drop toehold into the corner and everything breaks down in a hurry.

Helms hits a Codebreaker on Hardy and grabs a triangle choke, followed by some stomping from Chavo. The Side Effect gets Matt out of trouble and it’s the lukewarm tag to Rey to clean house. There’s the big kick to Chavo’s head and Poetry in Motion sets up the hurricanrana into the 619. Rey Drops The Dime and pins Helms, with commentary not even throwing out a token mention of the Cruiserweight Title.

Rating: C. Totally run of the mill tag match here but it worked out fine for what it was supposed to do. I’m still not thrilled with the Cruiserweight Title being the most worthless belt I’ve seen in years. Hardy can’t go after the thing and there is no mention of someone wanting to be champion, so the little value it already has goes lower and lower every day.

Maryse welcomes us back to the show, which is a rather obvious excuse to show off….yeah I think you get this one.

Elijah Burke vs. Tatanka

Sylvester Terkay is here with Burke, who praises himself before the match. Terkay offers a distraction and Burke gets in a cheap shot, only to get chopped down in a hurry. Burke gets in a knee and hits a dropkick in the corner, followed by a driving shoulder to keep Tatanka in trouble. The running Vader Bomb elbow gets two and the chinlock goes on. Tatanka fights up with a flapjack and the Papoose To Go, followed by the top rope chop to the head for two more. Terkay offers a distraction though and Burke hammers away, allowing Terkay to get in a cheap shot. Burke hits a Stroke for the pin.

Rating: D+. They’re doing the right things with Burke and Terkay here but nothing is clicking. Burke has the charisma and Terkay is the muscle, which is a formula that has worked for years but it isn’t working for them. Granted having to cheat to beat Tatanka isn’t going to make things better for them. This Tatanka gets cheated story needs to wrap up too, as it is approaching a few months now.

Trailer for the Marine.

King Booker asks Finlay if he will lay down for the king, but Finlay asks William Regal if he would do the same. Regal says of course he would, but Finlay isn’t going to do it. Booker: “DON’T DO THIS! DON’T DO THIS!”

King Booker vs. Finlay

Non-title and Queen Sharmell is here too. Sharmell offers an early distraction so Booker can jump him from behind for an early two. Booker hammers away but Finlay shows him how it’s really done and grabs the chinlock. Some forearms keep Booker down and there’s a stomp to the ribs, followed by an elbow to the jaw.

Booker gets sent shoulder first into the post and Finlay grabs another chinlock as he continues with the simple yet effective offense. They exchange forearms until Booker drops him with a side kick. Cue the Leprechaun with a mouse to scare Sharmell and the distraction lets Finlay get in a Shillelagh shot for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one but that wasn’t the point. This was about showing Booker as a bit weaker than you might expect and they had a short match to prove the point. You don’t need to do much more than that here, though Finlay continues to look completely comfortable against anyone in there. I know he isn’t going to be a long term main eventer, but he’s really good in the brawling enforcer role.

Bobby Lashley vs. Batista

We get the big staredown and handshake to start. They shove each other around and the test of strength goes nowhere. Lashley backs him into the ropes to escape a headlock and then runs Batista over with a shoulder. Batista hits a shoulder of his own but it’s way too early for the Batista Bomb. Instead Batista pulls him down into a chinlock with a bodyscissors, followed by the shoulders in the corner. A big boot cuts off Lashley’s comeback attempt but a double clothesline gives us a double knockdown. Cue Finlay to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was a bit more fun but it was exactly the same as the previous match: there was no point in trying to do anything here because the entire point was to get them in the ring and then do the DQ. There is nothing wrong with that and they did things as they were supposed to. Good enough stuff here, and Lashley hanging in there with Batista makes him look better.

Post match the beatdown is on with King Booker coming in to go after Lashley. Cue Teddy Long to say enough of this, because we’ll just make Sunday’s match a fatal four way. Dang that’s rather unfair to Lashley.

Post break Booker and Sharmell yell at Long but Batista, Finlay and Lashley come in to yell/thank Teddy as well. Long doesn’t want to hear it and makes the tag main event.

Sylvan vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Yang talks about how he likes NASCAR, cold beer and beating people up. There are no fast cars or beer around here, so that leaves a bad Roddy Piper knockoff line instead. Yang kicks him down for an early one as JBL freaks out about everything Yang related. Sylvan is back up with a clothesline and a bearhug, which is broken up in a hurry for the clothesline comeback. A missile dropkick gives Yang two and a kick to the face gets the same. Yang tries a victory roll but Sylvan stacks him up and grabs the rope for the pin.

Rating: D. It says a lot when even WWE seems to have given up on the Yang gimmick so soon. There is nothing to the whole thing other than a one note joke and it wasn’t that funny in the first place. Sylvan isn’t much better, but at least they have dropped the ambassador thing and are going with him as a generic foreign heel, which fits him a bit better. Not much better mind you, but it is an improvement.

Clip from the No Mercy press conference.

Here is MVP for a chat on the platform. He talks about how everything is changing but no one is ready for his debut. JBL loses it because MVP hasn’t even gotten in the ring yet.

Mr. Kennedy is in a black shirt in a black room and talks about how successful Undertaker has been through his mind games over the years. Last week Kennedy came face to face with it but he wasn’t scared. All of those plans mean nothing to him and nothing will prepare Undertaker for the devastation coming for him at No Mercy.

Michelle McCool, KC James and Idol Stevens are ready for Paul London/Brian Kendrick/Ashley Massaro.

Michelle McCool vs. Ashley Massaro

Both tag teams are here too. They trade shoulders to the ribs in the corner to start as JBL is in quite the bit of lust. Ashley hits her in the back and puts on an abdominal stretch, followed by the Boston crab. KC James pulls McCool to the ropes so Ashley tries a high crossbody, only to have Michelle roll through and grab the trunks for the pin.

Rating: D. Again, I think you get the point here and they aren’t exactly trying to hide that fact. That makes all the sense in the world but points to Ashley for being able to hang in there well enough. I know she isn’t a career wrestler but she is trying out there and you can see it even in such a short match.

Clips from the Marine premiere at Camp Pendleton.

No Mercy rundown.

King Booker/Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley/Batista

Finlay jumps Batista to start but Batista takes him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. They head outside with Batista hitting a clothesline and bringing it back inside so Lashley can come in. Booker gets the tag and walks into a suplex for two with Finlay having to make the save. They head outside again with Booker sending him into the steps, allowing Finlay to grab a chinlock. A knee to the ribs gets two on Lashley and Booker adds a basement dropkick to the face for the same.

Lashley suplexes his way out of a front facelock (Booker’s stunned face is great) but Finlay is back in with some elbows to the face. Booker takes Lashley outside again and starts striking away, followed by a crossface from Finlay back inside. Lashley powers over for the tag to Batista but Booker has the referee so we keep going (still a classic spot). A spear gets Lashley out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Batista, only to have William Regal come in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Much like the two singles matches, this wasn’t about the action itself but rather having the wrestlers in the ring before Sunday. It’s coming off like WWE has no confidence in the title match as you don’t often see two more people thrown in two days before. It should be fine, but they aren’t really hiding how B level show the four way is starting to feel.

Post match Batista cleans house and Lashley doesn’t look happy to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was the hard sell show for the pay per view and while they hit all of the bases, it still isn’t the most interesting show. No Mercy doesn’t feel like a major pay per view and there isn’t much they can do to get around that. The show wasn’t the worst and it did its job, but No Mercy isn’t an interesting show no matter how much they do on the go home effort. They were trying, but there is a limit to what can be done.

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Smackdown – September 29, 2006: Cena Brought It

Smackdown
Date: September 29, 2006
Location: Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re less two weeks away from No Mercy and most of the card is set. That’s a good situation to be in as it means the next two weeks can be spent firming everything up and adding something here and there. This week is about the guest star though, as John Cena is here for a six man main event. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look at King Booker’s Court invading Raw and making John Cena kiss Booker’s foot. Of course you know this means match.

Here’s Cena, with a banged up arm, to get things going. Before he gets into dealing with Booker and company, he is glad to be back on Smackdown because it’s like hosting Saturday Night Live. He’s the WWE Champion again and now he has a new movie coming out. Cena: “Go and see it a million times.”

Cena is glad to have the big fist and Tony Chimmel as the ring announcer. Then there’s JBL, who Cena remembers taking a beating the last time they saw him. Next to JBL is Michael Cole, the Whitney Houston to his Bobby Brown, and Cena has a gift for him. After handing Cole some balls, Cena talks about King Booker’s Court being here, but so are Batista and Bobby Lashley. Tonight, the odds are even.

Video on Vickie Guerrero joining forces with her nephew Chavo.

Rey Mysterio vs. Sylvester Terkay

Elijah Burke is here with Terkay….who tells Burke to take his place.

Rey Mysterio vs. Elijah Burke

Rey snaps off a headscissors to start as JBL goes into a rant about how Mysterio’s success in Mexico means nothing in the USA. Burke knocks him into the corner as we see the Guerreros being rather pleased in the back. That’s leg to in a hurry but Burke misses the top rope elbow. As JBL again called Terkay and Burke the best interracial team since the APA, Mysterio hits the spinning springboard crossbody to put Burke down. The 619 lets Rey Drop The Dime for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one other than Burke taking a loss that he probably didn’t need to lose. Terkay continues to be the star of the team, but that doesn’t mean his partner needs to be losing. Mysterio needed the boost on the way towards his match against Chavo at No Mercy, but I would think there is someone better to take the loss than Burke.

Post match Terkay jumps Mysterio from behind and lays him out with a Muscle Buster. We see the Guerreros seeming rather pleased in the back.

Ashley Massaro introduces a video on Brian Kendrick and Paul London.

Pit Bulls vs. KC James/Idol Stevens

The winners get a Tag Team Title shot at No Mercy and Michelle McCool is here with James and Stevens. Stevens gets pounded down to start so it’s off to James to get taken into the wrong corner. A kick to the chest gets two on James as JBL gets on Cole for playing soccer. Everything breaks down in a hurry and Kash’s moonsault press gets two on James. A small package has James in trouble but McCool turns it over to give James the pin.

Rating: C. Again, not much time to go anywhere but it could have been a lot worse. The problem is we’ve already seen Kendrick and London beat both teams so there is only so much interest in watching either of them get another shot. The lack of time might be annoying, but it was the right move here.

Marine video. Just have the thing come out already.

Matt Hardy vs. Chavo Guerrero

They trade some standing switches to start until Hardy drops him with a right hand. Back up and Chavo pulls Matt off the middle rope for a crash and it’s off to a seated armbar. That’s broken up as well and Matt hits some clotheslines into a backdrop. The bulldog gets two and there’s the middle rope legdrop. Vickie Guerrero gets on the apron for a distraction though, allowing Gregory Helms to come in for the real distraction. That’s enough for Chavo to grab a tornado DDT into the frog splash for the pin.

Rating: C. Two talented guys getting to do their thing for a few minutes is almost always going to work and the interferences both made sense. Chavo is starting to feel like more of a player than Eddie’s sidekick and while I’m not sure how far up the ladder he can go, it’s nice to see someone as talented as he is finally getting a chance of his own outside of the Cruiserweight Title.

Post match, Helms hits Hardy with a Shining Wizard.

This Week In Wrestling History: Andre the Giant knocked out Gorilla Monsoon in a boxing match.

Here’s Mr. Kennedy to bid farewell to Undertaker. There is a black wreath in the ring as Kennedy talks about how this is a tribute. Undertaker has taken on and beaten some of the all time greats and we see a video package on his career. All of those accolades leave him with nothing to prove though, which makes Kennedy feel bad about No Mercy. He doesn’t want to end Undertaker’s legacy, so he certainly doesn’t want to face him at Wrestlemania.

Therefore, as a man of good conscience, he cannot wrestle Undertaker at No Mercy. Cue Undertaker and, after about a five minute entrance, he promises to show no mercy and make Kennedy rest in peace. Then Kennedy goes to hit him with the microphone but it blows up in his hand to send him running.

King Booker’s Court is ready to make John Cena, Batista and Bobby Lashley hail the king tonight.

Commercial for Eric Bischoff’s Controversy Creates Cash book.

Miz vs. Tatanka

Miz sings his version of Sexy Back on the way to the ring. JBL: “I hate him.” Tatanka whips him into the corner to start but Miz gets out to the apron. A slide between the legs lets Miz hit the warpath as JBL makes every Native American joke he can think of in the first minute. Miz’s Russian legsweep gets two but Tatanka is back with his own for one. Now it’s Tatanka going on the warpath but Miz rolls him up with trunks for the fast win.

Rating: D+. The best thing about the way they are pushing Miz is he is racking up wins while not overstaying his welcome. I don’t think any of his matches have gone more than about five minutes or so and he is out there almost every week. Keep him warm, give him something to do and build him up a bit. This isn’t rocket science and what they’re doing is working well for an early stage.

Teddy Long is proud about last week’s debut being the second highest viewed show among adults on Friday night. Next week, Bobby Lashley and King Booker will pick each other’s poisons and you can find out their picks over the weekend on WWE.com.

Jimmy Wang Yang is a redneck and ready to face Sylvan.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Sylvan

Yang has the Confederate flag on his vest (JBL: “Who is he sponsored by? George Wallace?”) and comes out to I Might Have To Punch Someone Tonight. Sylvan hits him in the face to start but walks into a headscissors into a dropkick. A toss sends Sylvan out to the floor for a crash as Cole compares Yang to Dick Murdoch to needle JBL in a funny bit.

JBL: “I hate you. I hate everyone in the ring. The referee is Canadian so I hate him too.” Yang jawbreaks his way out of a chinlock and hammers away, including a spinwheel kick. Sylvan catches a charge in the corner though and grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C-. As has been the case tonight, not much in the way of a match but at least the JBL rants were funny. Yang losing doesn’t matter in the slightest as he is nothing more than a goofy one note character who was never going to be a big star. Sylvan isn’t either, but that reaction in Montreal last week probably earned him one more win, which is fine.

Vito says it’s the man that makes the dress.

MVP has signed with Smackdown and we get clips from his signing press conference. He debuts at No Mercy.

No Mercy rundown.

King Booker/Finlay/William Regal vs. John Cena/Batista/Bobby Lashley

This does feel like a big match and we see a clip of Cena getting beaten down on Raw during the entrances. It’s a big brawl in the aisle to start before the bell and we take a break. Joined in progress with Batista shouldering Regal in the corner and nailing the spinebuster, which draws Finlay in for an early save. Booker comes in to hammer away on Batista, who is right back with the Jackhammer.

It’s off to Lashley, who gets kicked in the face by Booker. That’s fine with Lashley as he counters a leapfrog into a powerslam to plant Booker for two. Finlay comes in and gets caught in a gorilla press gutbuster but Lashley misses a charge into the post. He’s fine enough to make the tag to Cena and everything breaks down with Cena cleaning house. The STF to Booker is broken up and the Leprechaun slips Finlay the Shillelagh to hit Cena in the bad arm.

We take a break and come back with Regal working on the arm as only Regal can do. The villains take turns working on the arm until Cena suplexes Finlay away. Finlay pops back up with a clothesline though and the armbar goes on again. Another clothesline gives Finlay two and it’s back to Booker, who (after a bit of mistiming) misses the side kick to hit the ropes. Lashley gets the hot tag to clean house as everything breaks down. Batista almost gets caught with the ax kick but Lashley spears Booker down for the pin.

Rating: B-. This was a pretty long match for a TV main event but it felt like it was something that mattered and that makes up for the problems. Above all else, the star power was here as you had this week’s version of the Super Best Friends against the top Smackdown villains and his cronies. That sounds like an important match and it worked out rather well, even if it was that long.

Post match Edge runs in to spear Cena to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Cena brought the star power to the main event and that’s what mattered the most here, but the rest of the show was a bunch of quick matches (similar to this week’s Raw but not that bad). That made it feel more like a show that wasn’t designed to be a big deal on its own but rather a way to build towards the future. That’s not a bad thing, but it doesn’t make for the most thrilling show.

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Smackdown – September 22, 2006: Welcome To The New Home

Smackdown
Date: September 22, 2006
Location: Bell Centre, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Attendance: 13,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re now officially on the way to No Mercy and we even have a main event for the show. Last week Bobby Lashley became the new #1 contender to King Booker, but tonight Booker has to face Vito. That’s what we’re getting on a Season Premiere as the show moves to a new network with the CW. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell come in to see Teddy Long. They don’t like that Booker’s hands are going to be sullied by a match with Vito because everything they have is the finest. After a look at Sharmell’s gown, Teddy has good news for them: Vito has stepped aside and Undertaker will face him instead. The accents are dropped in a hurry and panic sets in. So why advertise Vito when you could advertise Undertaker?

New opening sequence, featuring the wrestlers turning into comic book style caricatures.

William Regal/Finlay vs. Batista/Bobby Lashley

Batista wants to start with Finlay but gets jumped by Regal instead. That goes as well as you would expect for Regal, who gets sent into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. Finlay runs away from Batista on the floor so Batista settles for a spinebuster to Regal instead. Lashley comes in for a double delayed vertical suplex (not bad) and a snap suplex gets two on Regal. It’s off to Finlay, who gets caught in a torture rack dropped into a backbreaker but a low bridge puts Lashley on the floor.

Regal nails a clothesline and the villains (you know they’re villains because Regal’s trunks say “villain”) take over with Finlay dropping some elbows. It’s back to Finlay, who mocks Lashley for not being able to make the tag and kicks him in the ribs like an evil one would do. Regal’s t-bone suplex gets two as JBL talks about how much he can’t stand the French, Canadians or French Canadians. Regal jumps Batista on the apron so Batista comes in sans tag and cleans house. The Shillelagh is taken away from Regal so Lashley can nail the spear for the pin.

Rating: C. Nicely done here as they give Lashley a bit of a boost and let Batista vs. Finlay stay on the burner, likely for a showdown at No Mercy. They didn’t have much time here but the formula can work out well in short bursts too so this worked out fine. Good choice for an opener on the new network too, with a star like Batista and a hard hitting fight to give Lashley some nice exposure.

Here’s Layla, who promises to make Smackdown hot and dances a lot. Cue Krystal to say not so fast because she’s the hot one, meaning the brawl is on. Jillian Hall runs in for the save and rips off Krystal’s top. Then she rips off Layla’s top, followed by her own. And we move on.

Long video on Rey Mysterio and Chavo Guerrero being friends/family and then splitting up over Chavo and Vickie Guerrero not liking Rey cashing in on the Guerrero name. Still a totally fair point.

Matt Hardy vs. Gregory Helms

Non-title. They go straight at it with Helms being backdropped out to the floor. Back in and Helms slips out of something off the top and snaps Hardy throat first across the top. A swinging neckbreaker gives Helms two and an elbow drop gets the same. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Helms hits what would eventually become the Codebreaker for two more.

Hardy jawbreaks his way out of another chinlock and grabs the Side Effect for two. A moonsault press gets two on more on Helms, who is right back with the Shining Wizard for the same. Helms goes for the turnbuckle pad so the referee puts it back on, allowing Hardy to hit a low blow into the rollup pin (ala Helms last week).

Rating: C. Hardy doing the same thing to Helms as the previous week was a nice touch, but I’m still not sure what the point of this feud is if Hardy can’t (and doesn’t seem interested in) win the Cruiserweight Title. The wrestling was fine enough, but it feels like we’re going in circles here. I know the title doesn’t mean anything, so why is it even a thing at this point?

Miz promises to win his next match.

Jimmy Wang Yang thought about debuting tonight but doesn’t feel very comfortable in Montreal. Not too many rednecks you see, so we’ll do it in Oklahoma next week.

Miz vs. Funaki

They fight over wrist control to start with Miz wristdragging him down. Another takedown sets up a suplex, followed by the Mizard of Oz (which lands in a reverse DDT this time instead of a neckbreaker) to keep Miz undefeated. Keeping Miz short is the right idea at the moment.

Rey Mysterio has had it with the Guerreros and today is the first day of the rest of his life.

Video on the Marine.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Vickie Guerrero is here with Chavo. They start fast again with Rey hammering away to take it to the floor. The fight goes into the crowd with Rey still getting the better of things until his hurricanrana is sent into the barricade. Things go back into the crowd and Rey sends him into the barricade over and over. Rey doesn’t seem to notice that the referee is telling him it’s over and they get back to ringside with Chavo getting kicked in the ribs. Vickie throws Chavo a chair, which Rey dropkicks off his face. Vickie’s interference doesn’t work as Rey hammers away again and referees come in to break it up. I’m not sure this was a match.

Rating: C. It wasn’t much of a match as it was much more of a brawl than anything else, but I want to see these two fight again, which is a lot more than I could say coming in. You could feel the anger and hatred here and that’s the best thing that could happen in a segment like this. Good stuff and I’m sure No Mercy waits for them.

Maryse welcomes us back to the show. I think you can get why she has a job.

Tag Team Titles: Brian Kendrick/Paul London vs. Pit Bulls vs. KC James/Idol Stevens

London and Kendrick are defending and Michelle McCool is here with James and Stevens. It’s a brawl to start with James, Kendrick and Noble getting things going. The Pitbulls beat on Stevens and Kash pounds him down for two. Stevens breaks that up and Kash gets knocked down into the corner, including a snapmare for two more.

Kendrick comes back and hammers away, allowing the hot tag off to London to pick the pace way up. A dropkick gets two on Stevens with the Pit Bulls making the save. Michelle gets on the apron for no apparent reason as Kash brainbusters London. Sliced Bread takes Kash down but Stevens hits a heck of a spinebuster on Kendrick. Noble sends him outside and rolls London up, only to get reversed into another rollup for the pin.

Rating: C+. As the champs tend to do, they got in and out without wasting time and had a high energy match. They really have become one of the most consistently entertaining things on Smackdown and this should be the blowoff to the three way feud. I’m sure it won’t be because there aren’t any other teams to come after them, but at least they had a nice match here.

Elijah Burke introduces Sylvester Terkay. Sylvester: “I’m Sylvester Terkay.” End of segment.

Video on Batista visiting the Philippines.

Here’s Sylvan to a crazy hero’s welcome and he seems fired up to be here. After saying something in French, we’re ready to go.

Sylvan vs. Tatanka

Sylvan chops away to start but Tatanka comes back with some right hands and is booed out of the building. A backbreaker sets up a chinlock but Sylvan is back with a spinebuster. There’s a dropkick to put Tatanka down again and a spinning belly to back slam gets two more. Tatanka tries a sunset flip but Sylvan sits down and grabs the rope for the pin.

Rating: D+. The wrestling was nothing to see here but WOW that crowd was behind Sylvan. That is the kind of thing that has never happened before and will probably never happen again, but thankfully WWE was smart enough to capitalize on it once. Let the fans have something to cheer and let a scrub like Tatanka take another loss. This was nice to see and I don’t get to say that very often.

John Cena visits Teddy Long and thanks him for the contract offer that was ready had Cena lost at Unforgiven. Long has an idea: Cena visits Smackdown next week and teams with Batista and Bobby Lashley against William Regal/Finlay/King Booker. Cena is in and leaves so Long dances in celebration.

No Mercy rundown with Batista vs. Finlay and Mysterio vs. Guerrero announced.

King Booker vs. Undertaker

Non-title, Sharmell is here with Booker and Mr. Kennedy is on commentary. Kennedy gets freaked out by Undertaker’s entrance and JBL isn’t much better. Undertaker strikes away to start and knocks Booker to the floor early on. We take a break and come back with Undertaker hammering away even more, setting up the knuckle lock lift to have Booker in more trouble. The arm is wrapped around the top rope but Old School is broken up.

A Sharmell distraction lets Booker grab a superplex and it’s time to choke on the ropes. Booker knocks him outside for a ram into the steps, followed by a DDT for two. The side kick misses though and Undertaker hits a jumping clothesline. Snake Eyes into the big boot gets two but Booker is back with the jumping kick to the face. Undertaker is right back to load up the Tombstone but Booker slips out and hits a low blow for the DQ.

Rating: C. As has been the case almost all night, this was all about making an appearance rather than the match itself. Undertaker being in the ring is still a treat and it was a good idea to have him on a special show. These two haven’t always had the best chemistry but they weren’t out there very long and it’s not like the bad finish came after a pay per view title match.

Post match here’s Bobby Lashley to throw Booker back inside, meaning it’s a chokeslam and Tombstone. Undertaker stares down at Kennedy to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a show where the wrestling did not really matter but the presentation was very good. For a season premiere on a new network, they did a great job of keeping things moving and having all of the big names come in and out throughout the show. They set up things both for the pay per view and next week so some fans might want to come back again. I don’t get impressed by WWE very often but they did a rather nice job here and that’s great to see.

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Smackdown – September 8, 2006: What Should Have Been

Smackdown
Date: September 8, 2006
Location: Civic Center, Columbus, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We have a major match this time around as Batista is challenging Booker T. for the World Title in a rematch from Summerslam. In other words, this is the big special edition episode since there is no Smackdown pay per view this month. These things have hit and miss results but hopefully they can live up to the hype. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

JBL and Cole are on their feet for their intro this week. I don’t remember the last time I saw that. Anyway they preview the main event.

Finlay vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey is a bit shaken up after what Chavo and Vickie Guerrero have been up to as of late. The Leprechaun is seen looking from underneath the ring skirt during Rey’s entrance. Eh fair enough as it’s not like he’s a surprise most of the time. Finlay powers him around to start so Rey kicks at the knee in a smart move. That earns him a hard atomic drop to cut him down again, allowing Finlay to wrestle him down without much effort. The headlock goes on for a bit, followed by a gutwrench suplex for two on Rey.

We take a break and come back with Rey still not all there and getting put into a nerve hold as a result. That lasts all of five seconds as Rey is back up with a headscissors for two, only to get caught in the Tree of Woe. A backbreaker out of the corner gets two and Finlay drives him back first into the corner again.

The some city in Ireland crab goes on but Rey gets a leg out and kicks Finlay in the face. That doesn’t work on someone as mean as Finlay, so he switches to a kneeling half crab. Rey fights up again and starts kicking at the leg for the real comeback, including the springboard seated senton for two. Another springboard doesn’t work though as Rey slips and it’s the Celtic Cross for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was an interesting way to go as Rey was messed up in the head and Finlay was good enough to take advantage of what happened. Rey vs. the Guerreros seems like it could be a long form story but it is also nice to see Finlay getting a boost out of it. He has had a nice run in WWE so far and I could go for seeing a lot more of it soon.

Post match JBL gets in the ring to ask Rey what’s wrong (or asking why the Guerreros think Rey is a piece of garbage) but Rey leaves without saying anything.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Danny Giamondo

Non-title and Kennedy says Giamondo is a former Olympic silver medalist in power lifting and a six time NCAA Champion. Cole can’t find any of that information anywhere, even as Kennedy takes him into the ropes and chokes on the rope. The neck crank doesn’t last long as Giamondo fights up and hammers away in the corner. That’s about it though as Kennedy blocks a superplex attempt and hits the Green Bay Plunge to win.

Post match Kennedy calls out Teddy Long to say he might go to Raw if John Cena comes to Smackdown. Long doesn’t like that, so Kennedy can face the Undertaker at No Mercy. It’s a meme for a reason.

Video on the Marine.

Michelle McCool/Teacher’s Pets vs. Brian Kendrick/Paul London/Ashley Massaro

Stevens and London start things off with neither being able to get very far off a headlock. James comes in and gets his arm cranked, with everyone getting a shot in on said arm. Stevens low bridges London to the floor though and it’s a chinlock back inside. London grabs a rollup for two and gets over for the hot tag to Kendrick. Everything breaks down with the women getting in a fight, with the focus being on the skirts flying up. Kendrick comes off the top with a sunset flip to James, with London adding a dropkick so Kendrick can get the pin.

Rating: C-. They didn’t have much time here but the women being there does keep the match feeling different enough. The tag team division is hardly deep at the moment but there are enough teams out there for London and Kendrick to face for the next few….ok maybe not months but they should be fine at least through No Mercy. If nothing else, London and Kendrick are fun to watch.

Video on King Booker.

Vito comes out to do commentary for William Regal’s match. Regal comes out to say this was supposed to be against Vito, but after last week, Regal was considering a sexual harassment lawsuit. As Vito shows off his legs, we have a replacement.

William Regal vs. Bobby Lashley

Vito is on commentary as Lashley powers Regal into the corner to start and then pulls him back inside. Regal is sent outside and Vito pulls up the dress to show off the thong. That’s enough to have Regal panicking again so he pulls Lashley face first into the steps instead. Back in and Regal slugs away in the corner, only to charge into a boot to the face. Lashley can’t hit the powerslam but he can hit the spear for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was more about Vito, so at least he’s doing something other than beating up jobbers. It’s still not exactly a story that has any kind of legs to the whole thing but I’ll take any kind of a change over the same stuff if it has to be around. I’m not sure how long this is going to go, but Regal and Vito could have some comedy possibilities.

Post match JBL runs away from Vito’s handshake. Lashley shakes his hand though and there’s your endorsement.

The Miz vs. Matt Hardy

Miz insults the crowd before the match, including the local Little League World Series Champions. JBL classes things up by making all kinds of gay jokes about Cole and Vito before switching to something a little better by saying it’s stupid to brag about Miz being undefeated when he’s 1-0.

Matt starts fast by pulling Miz out of the corner into a powerbomb but Miz knocks him down in a hurry. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Miz fights up and hammers away as JBL is ranting about reality TV. Matt’s middle rope elbow to the head gets two and he sends Miz outside for a slingshot dive. Back in and the referee gets bumped, allowing Gregory Helms to run down and shove Matt off the top. Miz grabs a rollup with tights for the pin.

Rating: C-. The action worked while it lasted and Miz getting to brag about being undefeated is going to be rather entertaining. I’ve been a fan of the guy for years and it’s fun to see one of the most improbably rises in the history of wrestling. Miz isn’t very good in the ring but he’s a great character and personality and that’s what matters here.

Jimmy Wang Yang is still coming and doesn’t like people think Asians are smart. He got straight B’s!

Chavo Guerrero vs. Tatanka

Vickie Guerrero handles Chavo’s intro and says he is dedicating this match to the Guerrero legacy. Tatanka works on the arm to start but Chavo dropkicks the knee out for a knockdown. Leg cranking ensues as JBL rants about everything Guerrero related he can think of. Tatanka fights back with the chops, including the top rope version. The Papoose To Go connects but Chavo gets his foot on the rope. That’s enough to make Tatanka yell at the referee, allowing Chavo to jump him from behind. The frog splash is enough to finish Tatanka.

Rating: D+. Does Tatanka have photos of Vince with a sheep or something? He’s far from the worst thing around but is there a reason he’s getting on TV week after week? Nothing match of course, but I’m not sure why you would expect anything else. Chavo and Vickie should be fine as a team and odds are they are going to be a focal point for a long time to come.

MVP runs into Teddy Long and says he wants John Cena money to come to Smackdown. Long is tired of dealing with MVP’s lawyers so MVP gets serious, meaning Long has to wipe the spit off of his face.

Video on Batista.

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Batista

Booker is defending and Queen Sharmell handles the ALL HAIL KING BOOKER’s this week. Before the match, Booker gives Batista a chance to bow down or take this whipping. The bell rings after the break with Batista unloading in a hurry. Batista hammers away in the corner and grabs a keylock of all things.

The shoulders in the corner send Booker bailing to the floor but Batista rams him into a few things for two back inside. Booker gets in a kick to the face for two and is stunned on the kickout. We take a break and come back with Batista unloading on the floor and glaring at Sharmell for daring to get involved. An ax kick to a hanging Batista drops him to the floor and the side slam gets two back inside.

Batista fights back again and hits his own side slam for two more but Booker uses the trunks to send him outside. After decking William Regal in the crowd, Batista comes back in with the spinebuster. Sharmell grabs a chair so the referee deals with her, allowing Finlay to come in with the Shillelagh shot to the head to retain the title.

Rating: C. One of the good things about these major shows is they build things up well enough to make you believe that something could happen. I’m not sure they need to do Batista vs. Booker III at No Mercy but Batista vs. Finlay could be a heck of a power match. Booker will likely have to face Batista again but I’m not sure if that happens so soon.

Post match Finlay unloads with the Shillelagh to bust Batista open. A shot into the exposed turnbuckle and a chair to the head leave a pretty bloody Batista laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a weird one as there was nothing overly great on the show but they had enough stuff going on to keep my interest. In other words, it is a show that felt like it had a lot of good things to pick from but it didn’t wind up working out in the end. Smackdown continues to trot out some fresher, younger wrestlers though and that makes for a pretty quick two hours. Not a great show, but an easy one to watch.

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Smackdown – September 1, 2006: Off In The Distance/Thaddeus?

Smackdown
Date: September 1, 2006
Location: Sovereign Center, Reading, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are a long way off from No Mercy but it seems that we are going to be moving towards Batista vs. King Booker II for the World Title. I’m not sure how much interest there is going to be in seeing that match again. Other than that….uh…..well last week was the post Summerslam show so we don’t have much to build towards. Does Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero count? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vickie Guerrero officially joining forces with Chavo Guerrero (I guess it does count) and helping him in the beatdown of Rey Mysterio last week.

Opening sequence.

Here’s is an upset Rey Mysterio for a chat. Rey apologizes for not being himself but he doesn’t understand what Vickie did last week. Maybe he doesn’t want to know why but he wants Vickie and Chavo out here right now. Cue Vickie sans Chavo to say Rey is one of the people who cause her to cry every day.

It’s time she thought of herself, even though Eddie Guerrero saw Rey as his brother. She sees Rey as part of her past, so he isn’t included going forward. From now on, she is going to be Chavo’s business manager, which draws the required EDDIE chant. Vickie slaps Rey in the mask to cut off said chants and storms up the aisle. Chavo joins her on stage for the posing.

Matt Hardy vs. Gregory Helms

Non-title. Matt shoulders him down and grabs a headlock takeover but has to fight out of a cross armbreaker attempt. Back up and Helms sends him into the corner but gets pulled out into a sitout powerbomb for two. Matt goes up top so Helms catches him with a kick to the ribs, meaning it’s a crash out to the floor.

Back in and a swinging neckbreaker drops Matt again so we hit the chinlock. Make that a figure four necklock but Matt fights up again, only to get driven into the corner. A heck of a clothesline drops Helms and the Side Effect gives Matt two. There’s a middle rope elbow to the top of the head but Matt misses the moonsault press. Instead Matt ducks a title shot to the head and grabs a jackknife rollup for the pin.

Rating: C-. The match was fine enough, but I’m not sure what the point is in having a feud like this when Matt isn’t even a cruiserweight. What exactly is this building towards other than making the Cruiserweight Champion look weaker? Matt winning by avoiding some cheating was fine, but the title has been weak for a long time and now it is getting worse.

Mr. Kennedy asks Finlay for a US Title shot and Teddy Long is willing to make the match. He wants it to be bigger though, so Finlay says let’s make it a cage match. Kennedy says let’s make it a barbed wire steel cage match. Finlay: “How about I take you out back and beat the h*** out of you right now?” The match is on for later tonight.

Miz vs. Tatanka

This is Miz’s debut, sending JBL into a rant over his weird shorts. After a quick intro from Miz, he drives Tatanka into the corner but spends too much time HOO-RAHing, allowing Tatanka to switch places with him. Granted Tatanka doesn’t do anything to follow up, but he does switch places. Miz hits the stereotypical war dance for this week’s mockery so Tatanka chops him down.

The arm work begins, but JBL thinks he has it worse for having to watch Miz. Tatanka goes shoulder first into the post and Miz’s belly to back suplex gets two. The cobra clutch goes on so Tatanka is up in a hurry to slug away. Now the war dance sets up more chops to keep Miz down, including one to the floor. Back in and Miz sends Tatanka into the referee and grabs a backslide, with feet on the ropes, for the win.

Rating: D. This is one of those moments that kind of blows your mind when you know what it is going to mean. If nothing else, the idea of hearing JBL’s reaction to knowing where Miz’s career would go is hilarious. Miz wouldn’t get good in the ring for a LONG time, but he has a weird charisma that makes me want to see more of him.

John Cena is in the Marine.

US Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Finlay

Kennedy is challenging….but hang on because here’s Teddy Long to make it a triple threat (Pla…..actually that doesn’t work here so we’ll move on.).

US Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

Finlay is defending but it’s Kennedy trying to get an alliance going, earning himself a belly to belly from Lashley. Kennedy and Finlay do get together to beat Lashley down but Kennedy sends Finlay shoulder first into the post. The Kenton Bomb gets two on Lashley so Finlay puts Kennedy in the Boston crab. That’s broken up again so Finlay kicks Kennedy outside to brawl with Lashley.

Finlay gets sent outside in a hurry though so Lashley throws Kennedy inside instead. A suplex gets two on Kennedy with Finlay making the save. Lashley hits a gorilla press gutbuster to drop Finlay again, only to get jumped by Kennedy. Finlay sends Kennedy throat first into the bottom rope and pulls Lashley outside. Kennedy gets caught in the ring skirt so Finlay can pummel away but Lashley breaks that up. A delayed vertical suplex drops Kennedy on the floor but the Leprechaun pokes his head out from underneath the ring.

We take a break and come back with Lashley getting double teamed in the corner, with the alliance lasting all of thirty seconds. Finlay shoves Kennedy down so Kennedy punches him in the face, allowing Lashley to come back, only to get stomped down in the corner. The double teaming has Lashley in more trouble but Finlay turns on Kennedy again, which makes me chuckle for a change.

Cue the Leprechaun to beat up Kennedy as well, allowing Finlay to get two on Kennedy back inside. Lashley is back up and cleans house on Finlay, who can’t even get in a Shillelagh shot. The running powerslam connects for Lashley but Kennedy sneaks back in and rolls Lashley up with trunks to win the title.

Rating: C. They went a bit longer on this one than they needed to and I’m not wild on the stolen ending pin, but it makes sense to get the title on Kennedy. WWE has treated him like a big deal for a long time now so putting the title on him is one of those things that had to be done. Putting Lashley in there was a good idea as they needed to keep Finlay strong and they got the ending right, so well done.

We look at King Booker escaping Summerslam with the World Title over Batista.

Raw Rebound.

MVP, surrounded by his women, come to their ringside seats.

Vito vs. William Regal

Regal (rocking the red white and blue robe) looks disturbed by Vito, and says King Booker wants Vito to know that he isn’t the toughest man to ever wear a dress. Some shoulders put Regal down to start so Vito pulls the dress up to scare the heck out of him. That earns Vito some shots to the back of the head but Vito fights up again. The dress goes over Regal’s head so Regal, looking TERRIFIED, bails for the countout.

Jimmy Wang Yang is enjoying some ribs and doesn’t like being asked about Japanese restaurants. I’m kind of liking these things.

Michael Cole talks to MVP, who insists that he is not hiding behind his agent and would gladly beat up Batista and Bobby Lashley. He’s a world class athlete and no one here deserves to be in his presence.

Pitbulls vs. Brian Kendrick/Paul London

Non-title and the Pitbulls jump the champs from behind to start. Some double dropkicks put Jamie Noble on the floor and it’s time to start in on Kid Kash’s arm. A top rope double stomp to Kash’s standing back gives London two and he knocks Noble off the apron for a bonus. Noble pulls London outside though and hammers away, allowing Kash to hit a release vertical suplex for two.

A double clothesline drops London again and they even draw Kendrick in to keep up the beating. Noble gets in some trash talk in the corner but London manages to send him face first into the buckle. That’s enough for the tag off to Kendrick and the pace picks up in a hurry. Everything breaks down and London shoves Kash off the top, leaving Kendrick to roll Noble up for the pin.

Rating: C. Hokey smoke the champs won a match! I know they’re smaller guys but they have some really good chemistry and look like a team who are thinking as one out there. The young high fliers are always going to work as a concept and that is what we have here. The Pitbulls work well in the ring too but they have a lot of size issues to overcome due to the style they’re using. It works, but it could go south rather easily.

Post match here are KC James and Idol Stevens to drop the champs and stare the Pitbulls down.

The Boogeyman is still coming.

Here is Teddy Long to call out King Booker (with Sharmell) and Batista to sign the contract for their rematch next week. They both come out (Batista can always rock a suit) and Booker thanks Thaddeus (JBL: “Thaddeus?”) before saying Batista couldn’t beat him at the Summerslam Games.

A King shouldn’t be breathing the same air as a peasant like him. Batista says Booker (Booker: “THAT’S KING BOOKER!”) kept the title via a technicality so Booker calls him a peasant again. They both sign but Booker takes a swing, earning a spinebuster….ok not quite through the table, but the second one puts him through it to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a pretty flat show and the wrestling didn’t help things very much. I’m a bit surprised at the title match taking place next week instead of at No Mercy but at least they aren’t stretching it out far longer than they should. I’m liking the pushes/debuted of Miz, MVP and Kennedy, as it’s nice to see a new generation coming together. There is something of a future coming together, but it’s still kind of off in the distance at the moment.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2014 (2015 Redo): The Crowd Still Scares Me

Royal Rumble 2014
Date: January 26, 2014
Location: Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

The big story here is the rise of Daniel Bryan, who has gone from solid midcard guy to the people’s choice to win the Rumble. However, Batista has returned and is basically the guaranteed winner of the Rumble, no matter what the fans want to see. I can’t imagine this ends well. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Goldust/Cody Rhodes vs. New Age Outlaws

The Outlaws reunited as a nostalgia act and pinned the champs to earn this shot. Dogg and Cody get things going with Dogg hammering away, only to miss his Shake Rattle and Roll punch. Cody misses the Disaster Kick but sends both Outlaws to the floor. The champs hit dives on the Outlaws as we take a break. Back with Goldust in trouble as Dogg puts on a chinlock.

The Outlaws double team Goldust for a bit until he hits a jumping sunset flip for two on Dogg. Gunn charges into a powerslam and there’s the hot tag to Cody. A missile dropkick drops both Outlaws and Cross Rhodes plants Dogg for two with Billy making the save. Gunn makes a blind tag and hits a Fameasser on Cody for the big upset win.

Rating: C. This was fine for an opener and the fans were into the nostalgia. The Outlaws were only transitional champions anyway as the Usos would get the belts before Wrestlemania. Cody and Goldust had them back before the year was over too so no one was really hurt by this.

The opening video talks about working to achieve your dreams. Sometimes there’s a very thin line between almost getting there and getting everything you want. We also focus on Orton vs. Cena because that’s the real main event here. The Rumble itself gets a quick mention too.

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

Daniel joined the Wyatt Family on the last Raw of the year but then rejected them a few weeks later, leading to one of the loudest YES chants you’ll ever hear. Bryan punches out of the corner to start but Bray drives knees into his ribs and blasts him with an elbow. That’s fine with Bryan as he kicks the knee out but has to go after Bray’s followers Luke Harper and Erick Rowan. A suicide dive drops Harper but the referee ejects both monsters.

Bray huddles with his Family on the floor, allowing Daniel to take him down with a plancha. Back in and a high cross body gets two on Wyatt but he chops Daniel off the middle rope and out to the floor. Bray charges at Daniel but drives the bad knee into the steps to put him back down again. Back in and Daniel starts kicking at the leg before snapping off a dragon screw leg whip. A modified curb stomp gets two for Bryan but Bray drives him back into the corner.

They slug it out to the apron with Wyatt snapping Daniel’s shoulder down in a big crash. Back in and Bray hits his release suplex slam and we hit the chinlock. Bray puts Daniel’s head against the post and drives in forearms to follow up on Bryan’s recent concussion. Back in again and a kick to the face gives Bray a few near falls. A big release Rock Bottom plants him again and Bray does his Spider Walk out of the corner. Bryan finally avoids an elbow drop and hits a running clothesline.

Some kicks stagger Bray and a drop toehold sends him into the middle buckle. Daniel kicks away in the corner and nails a top rope hurricanrana for two. Another running clothesline is countered by a running elbow to the chest as Bray takes over again. Bryan low bridges him to the floor and hits a running tornado DDT off the apron. A running dropkick sends Bray into the barricade and a missile dropkick puts Wyatt down in the ring.

The YES Kicks get two but Bray turns him inside out with a clothesline for two. Sister Abigail is countered but Bray bites his way out of the YES Lock. Daniel scores with more kicks and hits a top rope splash but Bray ducks to the floor to avoid the running knee. The Flying Goat is blocked though and Bray hits Sister Abigail into the barricade to knock Bryan silly. Back in and another Sister Abigail is good for the pin.

Rating: A. This was considered a match of the year contender and it’s easy to see why. These two beat the tar out of each other with each move getting harder and harder than the previous. Bryan lost here but came out looking like a star. Bray on the other hand looks like a killer and that’s exactly what he’s supposed to be.

Paul Heyman says Brock Lesnar is going to challenge the winner of Orton vs. Cena for the World Title. However, first he has to make an example out of Big Show.

Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger is here.

The expert panel of Jim Duggan, Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair aren’t sure who to pick between Lesnar and Big Show.

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

These two have had a feud for years and this time Big Show has been getting the better of it through pure power. Lesnar takes Show down before the bell and pounds on him with fists and then a chair. As Big Show is down, Lawler says Big Show gave Lesnar his first loss at the 2002 Royal Rumble, which would be three months before Lesnar debuted. We get the opening bell with Lesnar getting another chair but Show nails him with the KO Punch. Lesnar is rocked and Show takes him outside for a whip into the barricade. Back in and Big Show loads up another KO but Lesnar ducks and throws him up for the F5 for the easy pin.

Lesnar beats on him with the chair even more after the match. He’s broken two chairs over Show’s back.

Shield says they have 27 enemies tonight and it’ll be the three of them left standing. Only one of them can stand tall at the end but Reigns thinks he has the winning number. He won’t say what it is though. Dean offers to tell him his if Reigns tells his. Dean: “What if I have two numbers? I have ALL the numbers!” They agree to believe in the Shield.

Orton says he’s going to beat Cena and put him to the back of the line. Renee Young asks about Batista, Brock Lesnar and Bray Wyatt wanting title shots but Orton laughs it off and calls Wyatt a deranged hillbilly Duck Dynasty reject.

We recap Orton vs. Cena. This is more about their short term history, focusing on the titles being unified back in December. Orton seems to be cracking under the pressure of being champion and even attacked Cena’s father at Raw recently.

WWE World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

No countout and no DQ with Orton defending.. The fans loudly chant for Daniel Bryan before and after the bell. They hit the mat and the fans are already bored less than twenty seconds in. Cena fights up and gets two off a bulldog but charges into an elbow in the corner. Now a Randy Savage chant starts up and Orton stops for a second before kicking Cena even more.

Off to a chinlock as the fans chant for Y2J. After fighting out, Cena catches on and tries a Boston crab. Orton kicks him to the floor during a brief Undertaker chant and now it’s just the standard boring chant. A clothesline puts Orton back outside but he sends Cena into the steps. Back in and a DDT gets two for Orton as the fans just say both guys suck. Cena comes back with shoulder blocks and the ProtoBomb, only to take too long jawing and walk into a powerslam for two.

A half nelson slam into a neckbreaker gets two for Cena but he gets caught on top. He headbutts his way out though and hits the top rope Fameasser for two. Orton counters the AA attempt into his backbreaker for two as the fans have calmed down a bit. The Elevated DDT off the apron to the floor gets two more on John. Orton’s RKO is countered into the STF but Randy is too close to the ropes. He grabs the ropes to block an AA as well but the refereee gets bumped.

There’s the STF again and Orton taps but there’s no referee. Orton uses the opportunity to nail Cena with a title belt for two. He stands around too long again though and takes an AA for two more. The RKO gets the same and now the fans want Divas. Orton misses the Punt but pulls Cena down into an STF. John counters that into a Crossface but Orton rolls into a cover for two.

Back up and Orton hits Cena with an AA, followed by Cena grabbing an RKO for another near fall. With nothing left to do, Cena loads up a middle rope AA but has to settle for a tornado DDT. The STF goes on in the middle of the ring….we’ve got Wyatts. The lights go out and come back on to reveal all three on the apron. Cena goes after them but walks into an RKO to keep the title on Orton.

Rating: B. This matchup has suffered from brand damage. We’ve seen it so many times over the years that even if the match is good, like it was here, people just do not want to see it. The guys got the crowd to calm down a bit about halfway through the match, but there’s just nothing left to see from these two. They’re both hard workers and try every time they’re out there but the interest is just gone.

The fans chant for Bryan as the Wyatts destroy Cena even more.

Tribute video to the recently passed away Mae Young.

The New Age Outlaws celebrate but tell Renee that she isn’t invited to the party.

We get some classic Rumble promos.

Miz will win because he’ll do whatever it takes to headline Wrestlemania again.

The Usos are cool with having to fight each other.

Intercontinental Champion Big E. says headlining Wrestlemania is where it’s at.

Fandango thinks he’s the only one worthy to headline the big dance.

Batista just says exactly.

Damien Sandow says it’s insane to try the same thing and expect different results. He won’t make the same mistake again.

Ryback says there are 29 superstars and one Human Wrecking Ball.

Mysterio will shock the world again.

The expert panel makes their picks. Duggan likes Ziggler, Shawn goes with Shield or Punk and Flair takes Batista.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals with Punk at #1 (as ordered by Kane) and Seth Rollins at #2. Punk takes him into the corner to start for some shoulders to the ribs. Some kicks stagger Rollins but he comes back with a big kick of his own. A clothesline drops Rollins again but he pops back up with an enziguri. Both guys are down as Damien Sandow is in at #3. The fans loudly chant for Punk as he DDTs Sandow and drops Rollins with a neckbreaker at the same time.

The heels stomp Punk down until Cody Rhodes is in at #4. Cross Rhodes plants Sandow but Rollins stops an elimination attempt. Punk dumps Damien a few seconds later though and it’s time for Rollins to get double teamed. Kane comes in at #5 and cleans Punk’s clock. He loads up the chokeslam but Punk kicks him in the head for a surprise elimination. The debuting Alexander Rusev is in at #6.

Rusev kicks Rollins and Rhodes in the face but can’t eliminate either guy. Instead he just beats everyone up until Jack Swagger is in at #7. It’s Swagger vs. Rusev now but everyone opts to gang up on Rusev instead. Cody and Swagger break off and Kofi Kingston is in at #8. Everyone fights by the ropes until Jimmy Uso is in at #9. The announcers are noticing how fast the clock is going by.

Jimmy goes after Kofi in the corner as Rusev works on Swagger. Punk puts Rusev in a sleeper and Goldust is in at #10, giving us a group of Punk, Rollins, Goldust, Cody, Jimmy, Swagger, Kingston and Rusev. Goldust hammers away until Rusev nails him in the jaw. A group of people gang up on Rusev and dump him out, which isn’t quite a great debut for him. Kofi gets thrown out as well but Rusev catches him in mid air. He drops Kofi on the barricade and it’s time for the great return. Kingston stands up, uses the barricade as a balance beam and jumps back to the apron in a pretty cool save.

US Champion Dean Ambrose is in at #11 and goes right after Punk. Things slow down again and Dolph Ziggler is in at #12. The fans are entirely behind Dolph as the ring is getting too full. Punk has to hang onto the apron as R-Truth comes in at #13, only to be dumped in about thirty seconds by Ambrose. Rollins knocks out Jimmy and Kofi steals Swagger’s boot while literally hanging on by his feet. Jack comes over to him but gets nailed by the boot as Kofi gets back in.

Kevin Nash makes a required return at #14. He eliminates Swagger with ease and goes after Ambrose and Rollins. Punk has Ziggler dangling but Dolph gets his feet back in. Roman Reigns completes the Shield at #15, giving us Punk, Rollins, Rhodes, Kingston, Goldust, Ambrose, Ziggler, Nash and Reigns. Roman cleans house with punches and spears before launching Kofi out.

Ziggler puts Roman down with a DDT but eats a spear to cut him in half. Reigns throws Ziggler out with ease and the fans suddenly hate him. Nash gets the same treatment as Reigns now has three eliminations in less than two minutes. Great Khali is in at #16 and goes after the Shield but gets tossed by Reigns. Goldust eliminates Cody to make up for the last two years but Reigns gets rid of Goldust a second later. That leaves the Shield alone with Punk but Sheamus returns after being out six months with an injury at #17.

Sheamus cleans house and gives Dean the ten forearms followed by an Irish Curse to Rollins. Reigns eats a Brogue Kick as Miz is in at #18. Punk is just laying in the corner and making almost no effort to get back up. Miz hammers away on Reigns in the corner and Fandango is in at #19. The entire crowd starts doing his dance but Miz sends him to the apron in just a few seconds. Fandango gets back in though as Shield slowly takes over again. Reigns motions to Punk in the corner but doesn’t go after him. Punk hasn’t moved from there in at least five minutes now.

El Torito is in at #20, giving us Punk, Rollins, Ambrose, Reigns, Sheamus, Miz, Fandango and Torito. Of course the bull cleans house until Punk stands up. Punk grabs him by the head but takes a headscissors, only to have Fandango run Torito over. The referee checks on Punk as Torito dropkicks Fandango out. Reigns catches Torito with ease and dumps him out for his sixth elimination. Punk gets back up as Cesaro is in at #21. He immediately starts swinging Miz but Shield breaks up a Swing attempt on Punk. Instead Rollins gets swung a ridiculous THIRTY TIMES. Luke Harper is in at #22 as Reigns spears Cesaro down.

Rollins and Cesaro slug it out until Jey Uso is in at #23. The brawling slows down a bit now and JBL is in at #24. Cole: “The JBL character has never entered the Royal Rumble.” Good grief. JBL wears his full suit into the ring but asks Cole to go get his jacket, allowing Reigns to dump him out. Fans: “YOU STILL GOT IT!” Erick Rowan is in at #25 as JBL tries to talk about ANYTHING but being in the Rumble. Rowan kicks Miz out to clear things up a bit but everything slows back down again.

Harper tosses Jey Uso but the Wyatts turn around to see the Shield. Ryback is in at #26 and goes right for Cesaro as the fans chant Goldberg. Alberto Del Rio gets lucky #27 and things slow down yet again. Batista is in at #28 and the fans just rip him apart. He quickly dumps Rowan and has a staredown with Ryback before dumping him as well. Del Rio, the man who has been going after Batista since he returned, superkicks him down but gets lifted into the air and dumped with ease.

Intercontinental Champion Big E. is in at #29 to almost no reaction but the fans like him for suplexing Batista. The fans are chanting for Bryan and get even louder as the countdown clock comes on. The clock runs out….and it’s Rey Mysterio. To say the fans aren’t pleased with this is the understatement of the year. We’re going to pause for a second here and look at this.

First of all, Rey Mysterio is a fine choice for #30 in the Royal Rumble. He’s a multiple time World Champion, he’s held nearly every title in WWE history, he’s going to be in the Hall of Fame one day, he’s the most successful cruiserweight of all time, he’s won the Royal Rumble before and he’s one of the most popular wrestlers ever. However, he’s not the right choice for this spot.

There are two schools of thought here. The first and more prominent is that WWE just did not understand the fans and thought they would accept Batista as the big star making his return and embrace him with open arms. Then they heard the reaction and changed course to make Wrestlemania all about Daniel Bryan. The other school of thought is Bryan not being in the Rumble was planned from the beginning, they knew where they were going at Wrestlemania the entire time and the stories about Orton vs. Batista headlining the show were false rumors. I’m in the middle on that but I lean more towards the second.

Now Bryan didn’t have to win the Rumble here. You could have had a bunch of different ways to get rid of him, even down to having Kane run out and eliminate him if need be. However, he should have been in the main event. It makes sense that he at least has a chance to be in there, even if it’s just to get screwed over again.

Anyway, we have a final grouping of Punk, Rollins, Ambrose, Reigns, Sheamus, Cesaro, Harper, Batista, Langston and Mysterio. Rey hurricanranas Punk to the apron as the fans are booing the heck out of the match. Sheamus clotheslines Langston out to end his worthless Rumble. Cesaro hammers on everyone in sight and Rey hits the 619 on Rollins just to make everyone even madder. Rollins enziguris Rey out for a nice pop and we’re down to eight.

Dean and Seth put Harper on the apron but Reigns Superman Punches him out to give him eight eliminations. Ambrose tries to put out his Shield mates but Cesaro jumps he and Rollins. That’s fine with Reigns who dumps Cesaro, Rollins and Ambrose all at once to tie Kane’s record for eliminations in a single Rumble.

We’re down to four now and everyone hits a finisher. Reigns takes the GTS but Kane sneaks in to eliminate Punk. That would be Punk’s last WWE match to date. Kane goes off on Punk outside and chokeslams him through the announcers’ table. We’re down to Sheamus, Batista and Reigns but all three are down. Another Daniel Bryan chant starts up as Batista takes over, turning it into a NO chant.

Sheamus cleans house and points at the sign before loading up a Brogue Kick. He misses Batista though and gets backdropped to the apron. Reigns elbows Sheamus out to set a new Rumble record for eliminations with twelve. That leaves Reigns vs. Batista and all of a sudden everyone is a Reigns fan. Reigns wins a slugout and clotheslines Batista down as the people chant for Roman. Batista comes back with his own horrible spear, only to have Reigns show him how it’s done….and then get thrown out a few seconds later to send Batista to Wrestlemania.

Rating: D. This just wasn’t a very good Rumble though its moments. Batista came in at the wrong time and it killed any kind of comeback he could have had. The fans did not want to see what the company was offering them at this point and they let them know about it. In their defense though, this Rumble was kind of awful. The comedy and returns felt forced, Rusev’s debut went nowhere and they might as well have given it to Batista and put on an hour of Mighty Mouse cartoons to save everyone’s time. It’s not a good match but the crowd reaction is certainly interesting.

Batista is booed out of the building as we see a highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The Rumble really hurts this show as it drags down two good matches and an entertaining Lesnar squash. The problem is that’s the lasting memory of this show: the fans booing the heck out of Batista as WWE seemed to think he was exactly what WWE wanted. The show isn’t horrible but it leaves a really bad taste in your mouth.

Ratings Comparison

New Age Outlaws vs. Goldust/Cody Rhodes

Original: C

Redo: C

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

Original:A

Redo: A

Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Original:B

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original:B

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original:A

Redo: D+

Hokey smoke that’s quite the drop.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/01/26/royal-rumble-2014-the-night-the-crowd-died/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2014 (Original): They Say No

Royal Rumble 2014
Date: January 26, 2014
Location: Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Tonight marks the official start of the Road to Wrestlemania. We’re ten weeks away from the biggest show of the year and barring some surprising changes, the main event will be set in place tonight. The odds on favorite for the Rumble would seem to be Batista, but for the life of me I can’t imagine anyone but Daniel Bryan winning it. He isn’t entered yet, but there are about ten slots left open. Give him a late number and listen to the roof blow off the place. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Cody Rhodes/Goldust

Cody and Goldust are defending and lost a non-title match to the Outlaws to set this up. Road Dogg starts with Cody and is taken down by a quick shoulder block. Back up and Roadie hits his shaky fist but has to duck the Disaster Kick. Gunn comes in off the tag but is quickly sent to the floor for a top rope clothesline as we take a break. Back with Road Dogg dropping a knee on Goldust for two and putting on a chinlock.

Goldust fights back up and a double clothesline puts both guys down. Billy breaks up a tag attempt as the announcers brag about how Gunn hasn’t aged a bit since the 90s. For 50 years old the guys is in good shape. Goldust finally makes the hot tag and Cody speeds things up, including a double springboard missile dropkick to put both Outlaws down. Cross Rhodes lays out Road Dogg but Billy saves at two. Billy comes in off a blind tag as Cody hits the Disaster Kick to Roadie, setting up the Fameasser for the pin and the titles at 6:30.

Rating: C. I was surprised here. Not only was this not the result I was expecting, but the match was better than I thought it was going to be. The Brothers had been on one heck of a roll since the fall, but this likely leads into the Authority being corrupt storyline. That doesn’t make sense given that the Outlaws just won the match clean, but I’m assuming that’s the idea.

The opening video focuses on a countdown and how the Road to Wrestlemania begins tonight.

We recap Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt. Daniel joined the Wyatt Family a few weeks ago but only lasted two weeks in the group before turning on Bray in the huge face turn, despite him barely ever being a heel. Tonight is the showdown we’ve been waiting for.

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

The Family is with Bray here, despite the idea of the match being that they’re not supposed to be here. Daniel fires off kicks to the leg and takes Bray down with a running knee but Bray gets in a shot of his own to take over. The Wyatts get in a few blows of their own and are ejected, with Bray saying he doesn’t need them to fight this war. Back in and Daniel gets in some kicks to the leg and a high cross body for two, only to be sent to the floor. Bray misses a charge into the steps and injures his knee again, giving Bryan the opening he’s been needing.

Daniel hooks something resembling an Indian Deathlock before stomping Bray’s face into the mat for two. They slug it out on the apron with the fans chanting YES/NO in time. Bray headbutts Daniel to stagger him and wrings his arm down onto the apron to take over. Back in and Bray is in serious mode now. We hit the chinlock but Daniel quickly fights up with forearms, only to be backdropped to the floor.

The annoying fans chant Jerry Lawler as Bray rams Daniel’s head into the post and drives in forearms for good measure. A running senton backsplash has Daniel in even more trouble and Bray asks the fans why they don’t help him. Bray catapults Daniel throat first into the ropes and we hit another chinlock. Wyatt does his spider walk out of the corner and the announcers of course laugh at Linda Blair jokes. He stays on Daniel’s neck with another chinlock but Daniel gets in a shot to the head and shakes the ropes before firing off even more strikes.

A drop toehold sends Bray into the middle buckle and there are the YES Kicks to the chest and leg. Daniel hooks a hurricanrana from the middle rope to send the big man flying but he’s out at two. Now the fans are into it by saying this is awesome and there’s the moonsault in the corner. Daniel loads up the clothesline but thankfully Bray knows what’s coming and hits a running elbow to stop Bryan’s comeback.

Bray misses a charge and falls to the floor, allowing Bryan to hit a running tornado DDT off the apron. Awesome looking move. There’s the running dropkick to knock Bray into the barricade and the missile dropkick puts him down back inside. Now the real YES Kicks have Bray in even more trouble as the fans are going nuts. The big kick to the head gets two and Daniel loads up the running dropkicks in the corner but Bray clotheslines him inside out for a very near fall.

Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two and there’s the YES Lock but Bray bites the hand for the break. Bray’s superplex is countered with headbutts and Daniel hits a top rope splash to crush Wyatt. Daniel loads up the running knee but Bray bails to the floor. Bryan dives at him with the FLYING GOAT but Bray catches him in midair and hits a wicked Sister Abigail into the barricade. Sister Abigail connects for the pin at 21:37.

Rating: A. Well that was awesome. This was a good example of a match where both guys could look great and only one could win. Daniel losing here isn’t a bad thing as he could still come back later and win the Rumble to make up for this. Both guys look better coming out of this and Bray was the one that needed the win more. As soon as he loses, a lot of his mystique is gone. Outstanding match here and something Bray needed.

The expert panel (HBK, Flair, Duggan) are impressed. Shawn seems fine after his fight with Bryan a few weeks ago.

Paul Heyman says Brock wants a title shot and talks about how great Big Show is. It doesn’t matter though as Brock is going to destroy him and then take over the WWE.

We recap Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar. Show doesn’t like Lesnar and is tired of him being a bully so tonight he’s standing up to him. He also stuffed a Lesnar takedown attempt on Raw earlier this week to show how strong he was.

Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show

For once this is under regular rules. Brock takes him down before the bell like an MMA fight and just mauls Big Show before blasting him over and over with a chair. More chair shots put Show on the mat as Jerry butchers history, saying Big Show gave Brock his first loss at the 2002 Royal Rumble (it was the 2002 Survivor Series). Show is beaten down even more with chair shot after chair shot. The bell still hasn’t rung.

The referee runs from Brock and Big Show says ring the bell. Brock comes at him with the chair but walks into the KO Punch which knocks Lesnar silly. He rolls to the floor and Big Show throws him around with ease. Back in and Brock ducks another KO Punch and gets caught in the F5. Lesnar WALKS AROUND WITH BIG SHOW ON HIS SHOULDERS and hits the biggest F5 you’ll ever see, making it more like an AA, for the pin at 2:05.

Post match Brock destroys him with even more chair shots, each one louder than the last. He bends two chairs over Show’s back so he goes to get a third and beats on Show’s leg. Show is left in a heap after what was much more of a segment than a match.

The Shield won’t tell each other their numbers. Rollins says the only number that matters is three.

Randy Orton says he’ll beat John Cena tonight and send him to the back of the line. Renee Young mentions Batista, Brock Lesnar and Bray Wyatt wanting title shots. Orton: “Bray Wyatt? He’s a Duck Dynasty reject.” The crowd laughs as Orton says it’s not John Cena’s night.

We get a LONG recap of John Cena vs. Randy Orton. Randy beat him at TLC for the Undisputed Title in a TLC match but tonight it’s one fall with no stipulations. On top of that Orton attacked Cena’s father a few weeks ago on Raw to make it personal.

WWE Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

We’re ready to go after the big match intros. The fans chant for Daniel Bryan and then that the match is boring. Cena takes him down with a headscissors and the chant shifts to the usual dueling Cena chants. Orton grabs a headlock and suplexes Cena down as the chants go to WE WANT ANGLE and Randy Savage. There’s a Y2J chant…..AND CENA TRIES FOR A LIONTAMER! It shifts the chants to Undertaker as Orton suplexes Cena back inside for two.

The fans think it’s boring as we’re in a chinlock less than five minutes into the match. They head outside with Cena being sent into the steps as the crowd is restless again. Back to the Bryan chant and Orton actually shouts that he’s the champion and not Bryan. A nice DDT puts Cena down for two and the fans think both guys suck. Cena comes back with an electric chair for two and the shoulder blocks followed by the ProtoBomb. Orton counters the Shuffle with the powerslam but Cena comes back with his half nelson slam into a neckbreaker for two of his own.

Cena loads up the top rope Fameasser but first has to block a superplex attempt before connecting for two. Orton throws him to the apron but Cena backdrops him to the floor to counter the Elevated DDT. The crowd has calmed down a bit now. Orton comes right back with the Elevated DDT on the floor and holds a finger to his ear for the crowd. Back inside and the RKO is countered into the STF as the crowd just does not care, probably because they know a title match isn’t ending less than fifteen minutes in.

Randy crawls over to the rope and gets in a shot to the head for a breather on the floor. Back in and Cena grabs another ProtoBomb followed by the Shuffle but Orton grabs the rope to block the AA. The referee gets bumped and there’s the STF, making Randy tap but there’s no referee. Randy hits him in the face with the belt for two as the doctor revives the referee.

The fans think this is awful as an AA gets two for John. An RKO gets the same and the fans still don’t buy that the match is ending yet. Orton poses as the fans say they want Divas. With nothing else to do, Orton puts Cena in the STF but Cena is quickly out and has Orton in a Crossface. That’s countered into a rollup for two and Orton hits an AA (done more like Cena used to do it without going down) for two more.

Cena of course hits an RKO for two of his own before loading up the middle rope AA, only to have Orton get free pretty quickly. A tornado DDT puts Orton down and sets up the STF in the middle of the ring….and cue the Wyatts. Cena chases them off but walks into the RKO for the pin at 20:53. Orton was surprised by the Wyatts being there.

Rating: B. The worst part about the crowd: the match was good. Trading finishers was something new for these guys, which is impressive as they’ve had about a dozen matches on PPV alone. The Wyatts interfering would seem to set up Cena vs. Wyatt at Mania, which is interesting to say the least. Good stuff here, as the show continues to rock.

Cena is destroyed as Orton bails. Bray hits Sister Abigail after shouting BEHOLD THE CREATORS OF THE NEW WORLD.

The New Age Outlaws tell Renee Young to put some more onto their intro. We look at the end of the preshow match and it’s a new record for longest time between title reigns at 14 years. They have two words for Renee: new champs.

We even get old school Rumble promos!

Miz will do whatever it takes to headline Wrestlemania again.

The Usos say only one can win and go to Wrestlemania.

Langston is ready.

Fandango wants to go to the Big Dance.

Batista: “Exactly.”

Sandow says insanity means trying the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. He won’t make them again.

Ryback says his unlimited energy takes him to Wrestlemania.

Rey Mysterio says he’ll shock the world again.

Back to the expert panel. Shawn picks Shield or Punk. Flair picks Batista. Duggan picks…..Dolph Ziggler?

Royal Rumble

90 second entrants this year and it’s Punk at #1 and Rollins at #2. Punk takes him back into the corner to start but Rollins puts him onto the top, only to be elbowed in the head. Punk comes back with strikes but Rollins just punches him into the face. A kick to Seth’s ribs slows him down but he avoids a big kick to the face and hits a running dropkick. There’s a running forearm in the corner but Punk comes back with the running knee. He calls for the GTS but gets caught by an enziguri. Punk kicks him in the face and both guys are down as Damien Sandow is in at #3.

Sandow goes right for Punk as Rollins gets a breather. Punk gets double teamed but comes back with a neckbreaker to Rollins/DDT to Sandow combo to put both guys down. He tries to throw Rollins out but Sandow breaks it up. Cody Rhodes is in at #4, meaning people from earlier in the night can be in as well. He hits a quick Cross Rhodes on Damien but Seth prevents an elimination. Sandow charges at Punk and is backdropped out to get us back to three.

Rollins gets double teamed but Kane is #5, wrestling in black dress pants. He goes right after Punk and stomps him down in the corner before hitting a nice side slam. Punk blocks the chokeslam with a high kick and throws Kane out with relative ease. Alexander Rusev, a Bulgarian monster from NXT, is in at #6. He immediately starts cleaning house but only throws Cody and Rollins to the apron. Alexander picks up Punk and throws him around with a fallaway slam and it’s Jack Swagger at #7.

Jack charges to the ring and hits a quick Vader Bomb on Rollins and Cody as the ring is filling up a bit. We get a showdown between Rusev and Swagger and the fans chant USA. Rusev takes over with a clothesline and a charge in the corner but Rollins takes Alexander’s leg out and it’s a triple team with everyone not named Punk stomping the Bulgarian. The fans are WAY into this.

Kofi Kingston is in at #8 and you can feel the big save coming. He rolls into the ring and immediately punches Punk down but can’t throw him out. Cody hits the Disaster Kick on Swagger as Kofi goes after Rusev, who he’s been feuding with in NXT. Swagger has Rollins upside down in the corner but can’t get him out. Jimmy Uso is in at #9 and hits a quick Bubba Bomb on Rollins and gets in shots on everyone else. Punk headbutts Jimmy and we get some good old fashioned racial sterotypes as it has no effect.

Goldust is in at #10, giving us a group of Punk, Rollins, Rhodes, Kingston, Rusev, Swagger and Uso. He takes Rollins down with some right hands and hits the kneeling uppercut on Jimmy. Rusev punches the paint off Goldie’s face to stop his momentum and eveyrone gangs up on Alexander again. We need some eliminations here. A big group of about five people get Rusev out in a showing that could have gone longer.

Kofi is knocked to the apron and into Rusev’s arms, so he lays him on the barricade and drives knees into Kingston’s back. Kofi stands up on the barricade and tightropes across before jumping ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE APRON in an incredible athletic display. Ambrose (coming through the entrance) is in at #11. He goes right for Kofi and then Punk as Swagger is in big trouble but gets back inside. Things slow down a bit as Goldust slides back in under the ropes. Dolph Ziggler returns at #12.

Ziggler speeds things up by pounding on everyone but is put on the apron in just a few seconds. The ring is really getting full as we need a monster to clear it out. Instead we get R-Truth at #13 but is double teamed by the two Shield members. They toss him to the apron and Ambrose kicks him out with ease. Jimmy goes up but gets kicked in the head, allowing Ambrose to shove him out as well. Kofi is on the apron but has to block a boot from Swagger. He holds onto it so long that he’s literally hanging in by his feet and pulls Jack’s boot off.

Kevin Nash of all people is in at #14, giving us a group of Punk, Rollins, Nash, Ziggler, Ambrose, Goldust, Swagger, Rhodes and Kingston. Nash puts out Swagger as soon as he gets in but has to deal with Shield. Things slow down again and it’s Roman Reigns in at #15 to put the entire Shield in the match. There’s a spear to Cody and a headbutt to Nash’s chest. Roman catches Trouble in Paradise and throws Kofi out but shrugs off the Zig Zag and hits a GREAT spear on Ziggler for a quick elimination.

Nash is low bridged out by Reigns as well as the ring is rapidly emptying out. Goldust and Cody go after Reigns but Rollins makes a save. Great Khali is in at #16 and Shield is on him as he comes in. The giant shoves all of them down but a Superman Punch knocks him into the ropes, allowing all three of them to put Khali out. Goldust, Punk and Rhodes pair off with the three guys but Cody is sent to the floor, only to be accidentally knocked out by his brother. Reigns dumps Goldust and we’re down to Punk vs. Shield.

Things even up a lot as Sheamus returns at #17. Shield is right on him but the pale one fights them off and gets them all in different corners. There are the ten forearms to Ambrose’s chest with the last one being to the exposed chest. An Irish Curse puts Rollins down and a Brogue Kick knocks Reigns silly. Sheamus stands tall but Reigns is dead weight. Rollins and Ambrose double team Sheamus and it’s Miz at #18, giving us Shield, Punk, Sheamus and Miz.

Everyone pairs off again but they all wind up in one corner. Punk has been down for a long time now but is likely just getting a breather. The clock is going very fast tonight as Fandango is in at #19. Shield swarms Sheamus as Fandango goes after Miz. Punk is still down in the corner. The fans want Daniel Bryan but get El Torito at #20. As in the little guy in the white bull costume.

Naturally he beats up a few guys but Punk gives him a look that channels Miz by saying “really?” Punk grabs him by the head but gets caught in a freaking hurricanrana. Fandango runs him over (JBL: “PETA is going to be mad. I head Mantaur is his grandfather.”) but gets hurricanranaed to the apron and dropkicked out by the bull. Torito dives on Reigns like an idiot though and is LAUNCHED onto Fandango for his sixth elimination. We’re back to Miz, Sheamus and Punk vs. Shield.

Cesaro is in at #21 and picks Miz up for a quick Cesaro Swing. Punk gets one as well but Rollins and Ambrose break it up. Cesaro rams them into each other and swings Rollins until it’s Luke Harper at #22. Reigns spears Cesaro down as things slow again. Rollins and Cesaro slug it out and Jey Uso is in at #23, giving us Shield, Sheamus, Miz, Jey, Punk, Cesaro and Harper. Speaking of Cesaro and Harper, they have a big power slugout with Harper kicking Cesaro’s head off to take over.

JBL of all people is in at #24 to a BIG pop and comes in wearing a full suit and tie. He yells at Cole to come take his coat, allowing Reigns to throw him out with ease. That’s #7 for Reigns. Erick Rowan is in at #25 and teams up with Harper to dump Miz, leaving us Shield, the Wyatt Family, Miz, Punk, Sheamus, Cesaro and Jey Uso. Jey is kicked out by Harper and Shield stares down the Wyatts as Ryback is in at #26. Everyone brawls and Alberto Del Rio is #27.

Nothing much happens until Batista is in for the big cleanup spot at #28. He’s in very short shorts instead of trunks but still looks good. He clotheslines Rowan out and it’s showdown time with Ryback. They slug it out and Cesaro has to dive out of the way of a launched Batista. Ryback is backdropped out by Big Dave but Del Rio clips Batista and kicks him in the head. Batista easily picks Alberto up and tosses him out though, right before Big E. Langston is in at #29.

Langston starts with a nice belly to belly on Batista and a series of backbreakers to Sheamus. The fans start chanting YES as the clock is ticking down. #30 is…….Rey Mysterio, completely letting the air out of the arena. The final group is Punk, Shield, Harper, Sheamus, Cesaro, Mysteiro, Langston and Batista. Rey and Rollins try to eliminate each other but neither go out. Sheamus knocks out Langston to get us down to ten but the fans just do not care now.

Rollins tosses Mysterio to a pop because he’s not who the fans wanted to see. Rollins and Ambrose stomp Sheamus down in the corner and get Harper to the apron but Reigns Superman Punches him out. Ambrose tries to get rid of Reigns but can’t quite do it, triggering an argument. Cesaro goes after both of them so Reigns dumps Cesaro, Rollins and Ambrose, which ties Kane’s record of eleven. His reward is a spinebuster as we’re down to four: Punk, Batista, Sheamus and Reigns.

Make that three as Kane comes in and pulls Punk out before chokeslamming him through the table. The final three are Reigns, Batista and Sheamus who are all down as the fans chant for Mysterio. Everyone slowly gets back up and the fans boo this out of the building. This would be Sheamus’ third straight final three by the way. Batista breaks up a spear to Sheamus as the NO chants begin. Sheamus rewards him with the Regal Roll but Batista ducks the Brogue Kick.

A backdrop puts Sheamus on the apron and Reigns dumps him for the record at 12 eliminations. Batista thinks he dumps Reigns but Roman slides back in as we’re down to two. Roman unzips the vest and stares Batista down as the fans are somewhat into this. They slug it out with Reigns taking over but Batista comes back with a spear. The fans are COMPLETELY behind Reigns here as he spears Batista right back. He’s all fired up….but Batista easily throws him out for the win at 55:10, letting the air out of the arena again.

Rating: B. It was a really good Rumble, but man alive if that crowd reaction doesn’t change something, nothing is going to. I’ve been watching wrestling my entire life and I have never ever heard a crowd just go silent like they did when Mysterio came out. I mean they just DIED. Batista was destined to win this thing, even though he was the completely wrong pick. Reigns looks like a STAR here but needed the win to cement it. Batista just was not the right pick here, but you knew it was coming the entire time.

The fans are not pleased as a lot of fireworks go off to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. Very ticked off crowd to say the least, this was an outstanding show. Everything was either good to excellent with only the world title match being a step below the rest. Raw tomorrow night is going to be VERY interesting as they’re either going to change a lot of stuff or have the worst crowd reaction to a Wrestlemania of all time. I had an awesome night with this show, but Batista should not have gotten that win, period.

I’ll have more in depth thoughts and analysis on the Rumble tomorrow after it’s had a better chance to process.

Results

Bray Wyatt b. Daniel Bryan – Sister Abigail

Brock Lesnar b. Big Show – F5

Randy Orton b. John Cena – RKO

Batista won the Royal Rumble, last eliminating Roman Reigns

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – August 25, 2006: Not These Guys

Smackdown
Date: August 25, 2006
Location: Wachovia Arena, Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re done with Summerslam and Batista didn’t quite take the World Title from King Booker. That means it is time to start getting ready for No Mercy, but that is a pretty long way off. In other words, we are going to need something to bridge the gap and maybe we can find out what that is tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here is Summerslam if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the big Summerslam matches.

Here is King Booker with his court to get things going. Booker has shown that Batista can’t beat him and now Batista’s chances of being the World Champion have smoldered. He owes a thank you to his court though and that means Queen Sharmell has a proclamation. Booker has officially knighted Finlay and William Regal, complete with a sword onto the shoulder.

Regal is near tears as Finlay talks about making challengers kiss Booker’s royal feet. That lets Regal hail King Booker as many times as he can manage until Bobby Lashley runs in to jump Finlay. Batista has to come in to break up the three on one beatdown, meaning it’s Teddy Long to set up the handicap main event.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Matt Hardy

Gregory Helms is on commentary. Matt headlocks him over to start and then scores with a shoulder. A hiptoss puts Kennedy down for a third time and the middle rope elbow gets two. Kennedy finally scores with a belly to back suplex but gets sent into all four corners in a row. There’s the Side Effect for two so Matt loads it up again, with Kennedy elbowing his way to freedom. Matt knocks him to the floor and dives onto him as well to send us to a break.

Back with Kennedy knocking Hardy to the floor and sending him hard into the steps. The armbar goes on for a bit, with Kennedy cranking away on the mat. Kennedy gets caught on top though (that’s a bad place for him) and Matt brings him down with a superplex for two more. The corner clothesline into a bulldog gets the same on Kennedy and another Side Effect gets another two. The Twist of Fate is broken up though and Helms gets in a cheap shot from behind. Kennedy’s neckbreaker is good for the pin.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad, but Helms vs. Hardy isn’t exactly a feud I want to see. Kennedy getting another win helps, but it might help if he picked a finisher and stuck with it for more than a few matches. At least they’re pushing someone though, which is a place that can always use a chance.

Ashley Massaro talks to Miz, who explains the concept of the Mizfits.

Post break Miz is in the ring and introduces Layla for a chat. Miz appeals to the Mizfits and after the silence, Miz announces that his in-ring debut takes place next week. Layla didn’t say a word.

Sylvester Terkay vs. Tatanka

Elijah Burke is here with Terkay and we see a clip of Tatanka’s recent losing streak. Terkay powers him into the corner to start but gets kicked out. That’s fine with Terkay, who hits Tatanka in the face to put him down. After a blast of water from Burke, we hit the standing choke to keep Tatanka in trouble. The double arm crank goes on but Tatanka fights up and strikes away. A top rope chop to the head drops Terkay for two as the foot is on the rope. Tatanka yells at the referee and gets kicked in the face for the pin.

Rating: D+. As usual, I have to wonder why Tatanka is the one getting a story right now. Terkay won the match, but the focus was on Tatanka’s issues with the referee. I’d hope that there is no false hope in the idea that Tatanka is going to be anything important, but there are other people who could use this kind of attention.

We look at Chavo Guerrero beating Rey Mysterio on Sunday, thanks to Vickie Guerrero.

The Marine trailer.

Here is Vickie Guerrero, to Eddie Guerrero’s music, to explain what happened at Summerslam. She loves the song and it always makes her smile, but it is the last time you will be hearing it. Vickie is not proud of what she did at Summerslam so she would like Rey Mysterio to come out here. Cue Rey, who hugs Vickie but Chavo Guerrero comes out to join them. Vickie apologizes for slapping her family and hugs him as well….but then he jumps Rey. Chavo brings in a chair but Vickie takes it again, only to hit Rey herself. A brainbuster onto the chair leaves Rey laying as the Guerreros leave together.

Paul London vs. KC James

Brian Kendrick, Michelle McCool and Idol Stevens are here too. London hammers away to start but gets punched in the face. James takes him down and we’re in the chinlock in a hurry. That’s broken up even faster and London kicks him in the chest. Some running knees in the corner connect and there’s the dropsault to put James down again. Cue the Pitbulls to jump London for the DQ out of nowhere.

Post match the three way brawl is on with London and Kendrick being left alone in the ring.

MVP, flanked by some women, arrives in his front row seat.

The Boogeyman is coming back.

Kristal vs. Jillian Hall

Kristal jumps her from behind to start but stops to pose, earning herself a shot to the face. A hair toss sends Jillian down again and some choking keeps her in trouble. Jillian comes back with a handspring elbow in the corner and then rubs Kristal’s face in her chest. Kristal grabs a rollup and pulls the jeans for the win. That’s about as stereotypical of a Divas match as you could get from this era.

Jimmy Wang Yang says he isn’t a kung fu fighter because he’s a redneck. Well it’s something new.

Vito vs. Sylvan

Sylvan talks trash to start but gets sent to the floor in a hurry. That’s fine with Vito who follows him out to hammer away, only to get taken back inside. Sylvan hits the running crotch attack to the back of the neck and a slam sets up the chinlock. Vito suplexes his way to freedom and the dress comes up a bit. Some shots to the face set up the armbar with the dress over the head to make Sylvan tap.

Rating: D-. This has got to be one of the dumbest things they have done in a long time. The gimmick itself isn’t the worst, but how many weeks in a row do we need to see the exact same thing before WWE thinks we get the concept? Beating a bunch of losers and then a bigger loser in Sylvan while doing the same stuff over and over again isn’t likely to work, but that has never stopped WWE before.

Post match MVP laughs at Vito, so Vito challenges him to get in the ring. MVP gets on the apron but stops to answer a phone call. His agent says no without the big money deal so MVP backs off and leaves with the girls. I wouldn’t waste my debut on Vito either.

We look at the opening segment.

William Regal/King Booker/Finlay vs. Batista/Bobby Lashley

Batista clears out Finlay and Regal to start and grabs Booker, only to have Finlay jump him from behind. The running corner clothesline connects and Batista sends him outside, where Lashley is waiting. Back in and Batista beats up Finlay and Regal again before Lashley tells Booker to bring it. Booker heads to the floor again and we take a break.

Back with Lashley kicking Regal in the ribs in the corner and handing it back to Batista for a suplex. Lashley’s suplex gets two but Booker gets in a cheap shot from the apron. Booker comes in and stomps away, allowing him to pose a bit. The villains get to take their turns on Lashley for a change, with Booker kicking him in the face for two.

Finlay pulls Lashley to the floor and a distraction lets him pull the Leprechaun out for an apron splash. Back in again and Lashley is fine enough to hit a rather delayed suplex for two on Booker. Batista gets the hot tag and cleans house with spinebusters and slams. Booker gets in a shot from behind but Batista hits a spinebuster and gets the pin in a hurry.

Rating: C. Totally standard main event tag match here, at least until the ending which came out of nowhere and did what it was supposed to do. Batista has now shown he can defeat Booker and that is going to be enough to set up the main event of No Mercy, or at least get us in that direction.

Posing and trash talking end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a weird period for Smackdown as Batista has lost a lot of his spark and there is nothing on the show that feels important or something that you need to see. There is nothing very good or even that feels worth your time on here and that has been the case for a bit. Smackdown could use some kind of a spark and I don’t see that coming from Vito, Tatanka, and whatever the women are fighting over this time.

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2008 (2021 Redo): I Must Be In A Good Mood

Royal Rumble 2008
Date: January 27, 2008
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City New York
Attendance: 20,798
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Tazz

This show is special for a few reasons, not the least of which is the fact that we are in the Garden. That alone is enough to get excited, but the other big story here is the Raw World Title match between Jeff Hardy and Randy Orton, which is so intriguing that it seems to have raised the buys of the show to its highest in a few years. I’m curious to see how well it holds up so let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the Garden and the history of the Royal Rumble. You can’t ask for much more than that.

Ric Flair vs. MVP

MVP’s US Title isn’t on the line but Flair’s career is, which is hardly a fair trade. Before the match, Flair talks about his history in this building and thanks the fans for all of the respect they have given him since his first match here in March 1976. Then MVP’s music cuts him off because WWE knows how to disrespect legends.

Feeling out process to start with Flair working on the arm so MVP shoves him away. That just gets on Flair’s nerves so he hammers away in the corner, earning himself a kick to the face. The chinlock goes on as the fans let MVP know that he sucks. That’s broken up and Flair goes for the leg, only to get stomped down in the corner again.

A running boot in the corner gets three on Flair, but the foot is on the rope for the heart stopping moment. MVP suplexes him for two and superplexes him for the same. Flair gets in a double clothesline for a double knockdown and some rollups get two each. MVP is back with a shot to the throat but the Playmaker is reversed into the Figure Four for the tap.

Rating: C. I’m not wild on the US Champion losing but there is nothing wrong with giving Flair one more win in Madison Square Garden. The Flair retirement tour was a good thing to see as he earned a lot of the respect and farewells, so MVP losing isn’t the worst thing. I can’t imagine MVP minded putting Flair over in this situation either so it isn’t quite worth getting mad about.

Vince McMahon thinks Flair is rather lucky and explains the idea of the luck of the Irish to Hornswoggle, his illegitimate son at the moment. We hear a bit about the McMahon’s history here in the Garden until Finlay comes in to get Hornswoggle out of there before Vince can…..whatever Vince would do with a bearded leprechaun.

We meet the newest member of the Raw announce team: Mike Adamle. Oh boy here we go.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. John Bradshaw Layfield. Jericho returned with the SAVE US deal but JBL didn’t like the idea and cost him the WWE Title. Now it’s time to come out of retirement for the fight, with JBL even bringing Jericho’s children into the trash talk to make it personal.

Chris Jericho vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

If nothing else, it’s weird to see Jericho with the short hair and long tights. Jericho backs him into the ropes to start but JBL gets in a cheap shot as the referee pulls him away. That earns him a running forearm as Jericho is all ticked off here. The Clothesline From JBL misses so Jericho grabs the Walls, sending JBL straight to the rope. They head outside with JBL getting the better of things, meaning it’s time to catapult Jericho throat first into the bottom rope.

The choking ensues, followed by the sleeper to go old school. That’s broken up and Jericho hits his own running clothesline to put them both down. There’s a big boot to drop Jericho again and JBL sends him shoulder first into the post. Jericho comes up bleeding so JBL stomps away at the head in the corner. That earns him some running forearms to the head and the Lionsault connects. A Cactus Clothesline puts them both on the floor, where Jericho BLASTS him with a chair to the head for the DQ.

Rating: B-. This was as intense and emotional as I’ve seen from Jericho in a long time and it was actually a good brawl. JBL is much better suited for something like this and the ending sets up a rematch at No Way Out. Jericho needed this kind of performance to reestablish himself and the blood looked good too.

Post match Jericho beats JBL up even more and chokes him with a camera cord in a similar version of what JBL did to him a few weeks ago.

Ashley Massaro tries to talk to Maria but gets Maria’s boyfriend Santino Marella again. NO, Maria is NOT posing for Playboy!

We recap Edge vs. Rey Mysterio. Edge has hooked up with Vickie Guerrero and has the Edgeheads behind him, making him all the more invincible. Rey Mysterio won a Beat The Clock Challenge to earn the show.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Rey Mysterio

Edge, is defending and has the wheelchair bound Vickie Guerrero and the Edgeheads with him. Edge goes after the arm to start so Rey forearms him in the face for the break (the simple exits often work best). Rey dropkicks him down for an early two and Edge is looking frustrated. A toss to the floor sets up a baseball slide to Rey, meaning the Edgeheads can get in their cheap shots.

Back in and Edge kicks the leg out to knock Rey off the middle rope. That’s enough to give Edge a target and we hit the half crab. Rey limps up for an enziguri before limping into a powerslam to give Edge two. Another leg crank goes on before Edge tries to expose the knee, allowing Rey to come back with the wheelbarrow bulldog.

The good leg kicks Edge in the face for two more and a seated senton gets two more. A top rope double stomp gets another two so Edge kicks him in the face. The spear misses though and it’s a 619 into the frog splash, but Vickie gets up and pulls the referee. Rey tries another 619 but hits Vickie by mistake. That’s enough to distract Rey so the spear can retain the title.

Rating: C+. There wasn’t much drama here but that’s where the Royal Rumble title shot stereotype comes from. Rey did what he does best here by fighting from underneath and giving you some hope spots but Vickie interfering was the big surprise. She’s a great heat machine and Edge surviving as champion as a result is about as good of a way as you could go here.

Mr. Kennedy comes up to a towel clad Ric Flair in the back. Kennedy suggests a match with Flair but here’s Shawn Michaels to glare him off. Shawn: “Imagine a loud mouthed bleach blonde guy with a catchphrase. That’ll never work. These kids today.” Flair knows Shawn will win so here are Batista and HHH, the latter of whom tells Flair to put his pants on (HHH: “I know I’ve said this a million times before.”). Anyway Shawn says the best man will win tonight, and he’ll be wearing the brand new HBK t-shirt, available now at Shop WWE!

Here’s Maria for the Kiss Cam, because that happens at the Royal Rumble. Cue Ashley to say Playboy wants Maria. Cue Santino Marella with someone wearing a sheet over their head. Santino says it’s not happening and makes fun of the New York sports teams. With the LET’S GO GIANTS chant out of the way, Maria asks the fans if they want her to pose. Santino say no again, and brings the sheeted person in. Naturally it’s Big Dick Johnson, in a New England Patriots jersey. Ashley beats him up anyway.

Mike Adamle throws us to a video on Randy Orton vs. Jeff Harvey.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy for the Raw World Title. Orton was born to be a star and has every natural gift there is. He breathes wrestling and was destined to be the best. Then there is Jeff Hardy, who is more of a free spirit and rose to this level because he lives for the moment. There are some great old clips of both of them plus the rest of the Orton family. Hardy beat him in a tag match and keeps diving off of one thing after another, which has made fans believe he has a chance. I was right there with them because this was an excellent build.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy, the Intercontinental Champion (not on the line) is challenging and yes, he could win. A headlock takeover puts Orton down for a quick two and Hardy pulls back hard on the head. That’s reversed into a headscissors but Jeff escapes and hits a basement dropkick for two more. A clothesline puts Orton on the floor and a slingshot dropkick sends him hard into the barricade.

Hardy hits a dive so Orton chills for a bit, only to have Hardy head outside to win a slugout. Back in and Hardy’s springboard attempt is cut off with a dropkick to send him crashing back to the floor. Orton suplexes him on the floor as you can feel the pace slow in a hurry. The stomping and choking ensue back inside but Hardy knocks him outside again. There’s the clothesline from the apron but Hardy misses a charge into the post. The chinlock with the bodyscissors goes on for a good while until Hardy fights up again.

Some running shot to the face set up the Whisper in the Wind for two on Orton and the slingshot dropkick connects in the corner. Orton rolls to the apron before the Swanton can launch and a missile dropkick puts him on the floor again. Hardy isn’t waiting around and moonsaults down onto him for another double knockdown. Back in and Hardy tries the Twist of Fate but Orton reverses into the RKO for the fast pin to retain.

Rating: B. The more I see this match, the more I like it. Hardy was rolling with the high flying and risk taking but the ending made sense: Hardy tried to go with the wrestling and got caught because that’s Orton’s wheelhouse. This gave you the impression that Hardy could win and that was all they needed to do here. Nice job and you could tell that Hardy was more than just a challenger of the month at this point.

Jeff gets a kind of lukewarm standing ovation, but the Garden isn’t the best indication of the masses.

Rumble By The Numbers time!

Rumble By The Numbers:

21 Winners

569 Wrestlers Eliminated

36 Eliminations for Steve Austin, the most ever

11 Royal Rumbles for Shawn Michaels, the most ever

11 Eliminations for Kane, the most in one match

10 Consecutive Royal Rumbles for Kane

3 Times Mick Foley entered in 1998

2 Feet that need to hit the ground for an elimination

1 Woman to have entered, with Chyna

62:12 for Rey Mysterio in 2006, the most ever

:02 For Warlord in 1990, the least ever

3 Wins for Steve Austin, the most ever

#1 Spot, which has produced more winners than #30

1 Winner from #30, the Undertaker in 2007

4 Winners from #27, the most of all time

73% Success rate for winners at Wrestlemania

1 Road to Wrestlemania

Dang I love that thing.

Royal Rumble

Ninety second intervals this year and Michael Buffer is the special ring announcer in one of (if not the) his only appearances for the company. Undertaker is in at #1 and Shawn Michaels is in at #2 because they’re starting big this year (and with the final two from last year’s Rumble). Granted Buffer doesn’t actually say “Shawn Michaels”, instead introducing him as the Heartbreak Kid. Shawn chops away to start but gets sent flying upside down into the corner. A shot to the face puts Undertaker on the apron but he shoves Michaels away.

Santino Marella is in at #3 and lasts as long as you would expect for the first elimination. Shawn chops away even more and hits an atomic drop as Great Khali is in at #4. Undertaker goes straight for him but gets chopped down as the fans give Khali a YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chant. They fight over a chokeslam and Undertaker shoves him out to get us back to two. Hardcore Holly is in at #5 to stomp away at Undertaker in the corner. For some reason Undertaker can’t eliminate Holly and it’s John Morrison in at #6.

Undertaker and Shawn form the Texas Mega Powers but Morrison counters Sweet Chin Music to kick Shawn in the head. Tommy Dreamer is in at #7 and the fans are VERY happy to see him. Dreamer goes after Undertaker but Shawn takes his place to stomp the big man down. Batista is in at #8 to pick things up again, plus toss Dreamer for daring to break up a showdown with the Undertaker.

It’s Hornswoggle in at #9 and he goes straight underneath the ring in a smart move. Everyone brawls around the ring and it’s Chuck Palumbo, as a biker, in at #10. That gives us Undertaker, Shawn, Holly, Morrison, Batista, Hornswoggle and Palumbo for a rather eclectic group. Jamie Noble, currently feuding with Palumbo, is in at #11 and gets knocked out in less than thirty seconds.

Noble’s banged up ribs need some help getting to the back and it’s CM Punk in at #12. The pace picks up until Undertaker clotheslines Punk’s head off. Palumbo and Morrison go after Punk until he tosses Palumbo to clear things out a bit. Cody Rhodes is in at #13 and saves Holly (his partner) and Batista backdrops Shawn. Umaga is in at #14 and tosses Holly in a hurry. Snitsky is in at #15 as they’re flying through these entrants.

Everyone fights by the ropes and it’s the Miz in at #16, meaning we have Miz and Morrison working together. Undertaker and Umaga kick each other on the mat as Shelton Benjamin is in at #17 to snap Miz and Morrison’s throats on top. That earns him Sweet Chin Music for the elimination and it’s Jimmy Snuka in at #18 for the nostalgia pop. Undertaker hurts himself trying the headbutt and it’s Roddy Piper in at #19 for the REAL nostalgia pop. Snuka looks stunned as everyone stops to watch the old guys fight.

Kane is in at #20, giving us Undertaker, Michaels, Morrison, Batista, Hornswoggle (still under the ring), Punk, Rhodes, Umaga, Snitsky, Miz, Snuka, Piper and Kane, which has to be one of the best collections of talent ever in a ring. Kane wastes no time in eliminating Piper and Snuka (they were just there for the one pop anyway so that was all they should have done), much to the fans’ annoyance. Umaga saves Shawn from Undertaker’s chokeslam for some reason and Carlito is in at #21. A Backstabber drops Punk but Cody bulldogs Carlito down.

Mick Foley is in at #22 (big pop) and Undertaker hits a Last Ride on Batista, which isn’t even acknowledged. Mr. Kennedy is in at #23 to a big reaction and some house cleaning. A bit too much trash talk earns him a chokeslam from Undertaker and it’s Big Daddy V in at #24. Undertaker eliminates Snitsky but gets superkicked out by Shawn. Kennedy dumps Shawn and the ring is cleared out in a hurry. Undertaker drives Snitsky through the announcers’ table (or mostly through it) to blow off some steam as Cody and Kennedy tease eliminating each other.

Mark Henry is in at #25 as Hornswoggle comes out to eliminates Miz (still without getting inside). ECW Champion Chavo Guerrero is in at #26 as Kane kicks Morrison out. It’s nice to see the one in one out (or close to it) as it keeps things from getting too clogged up. Henry pulls Hornswoggle in so here’s Finlay, presumably in at #27, for the save. Finlay and Hornswoggle leave without being sent over the top but Finlay is officially disqualified for using the Shillelagh.

Elijah Burke is in at #28 as Batista falls out to the floor without being eliminated. Chavo gets rid of Punk and it’s HHH in at #29. Cody is gone, Big Daddy V is gone and Foley and Burke all go out together as HHH’s hands. HHH punches at everyone he can find, including a Pedigree to Umaga.

The clock is on and……JOHN CENA is in at #30 to blow the roof off the place because he was out with a torn pectoral muscle was wasn’t even certain for Wrestlemania. The Garden is stunned for about ten seconds before realizing that they’re supposed to hate Cena (this really is one of the best surprises the Rumble has ever seen and I smile at it every time). That gives us a final group of Batista, Umaga, Kane, Carlito, Kennedy, Henry, Guerrero, HHH and Cena, which is not too shabby.

Cena goes after Henry and the fans are actually buzzing for a change. Carlito and Henry get tossed by Cena, who goes nose to (large) nose with HHH. The slugout goes to Cena until HHH catches him with a spinebuster. Batista is back in to get rid of Kennedy and Umaga. Kane is tossed out by Batista and HHH, leaving us with Batista, HHH and Cena. HHH tells both of them to suck it and the fight is on. Cena backdrops his way out of a Batista Bomb attempt and Batista is clotheslined out, leaving us with two.

The BOO/YAY slugout it on with Cena getting the better of it and initiating the finishing sequence. The AA is escaped and there’s a double clothesline to put both of them down. Back up and HHH escapes another AA before grabbing a DDT for two. The Pedigree is countered so Cena tries the AA again. That’s broken up as well so Cena grabs it one more time and finally tosses HHH to win.

Rating: B+. I like this one more every time I see it with the Cena return being one of the best things the Rumble has ever done. The rest of the match was very well booked with the big star, the great nostalgia for Piper/Snuka/Foley and enough top names throughout to keep anything from getting dull. They had the right balance here and I had a really good time with the whole thing.

Cena celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. I’ve seen this one a few times now and I don’t remember liking it this much. Maybe it’s how bad the modern stuff would get but this was a show where they did their thing each time, had everything working as it should have and then finished it up with a really good Rumble. It set up an underrated Wrestlemania too and after this, I can’t say I’m surprised. Very good show here and worth a look if you haven’t seen it in a bit.

Ratings Comparison

Ric Flair vs. MVP

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

2018 Redo: C

2021 Redo: C

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Chris Jericho

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2018 Redo: D+

2021 Redo: B-

Edge vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: A-

2013 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: B

2021 Redo: C+

Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: B-

2021 Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: C+

2021 Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C-

2018 Redo: C

2021 Redo: B+

Well dang man. Was I in a really good mood today or something? And this is the first time I’ve ever liked JBL vs. Jericho? Really?

Here is the original if you are interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2021/01/18/royal-rumble-count-up-2008-original-the-big-surprise/

And the 2013 Redo:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2021/01/18/royal-rumble-count-up-2008-2013-redo-it-keeps-getting-better/

And the 2019 Redo:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2021/01/18/royal-rumble-count-up-2008-2019-redo-thats-a-trio/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

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