IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: May 17, 2018
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Percy Watson, Nigel McGuinness, Vic Joseph

So you remember last week when I was wondering how you could put together a show featuring almost nothing but Money in the Bank qualifying matches? Well that’s pretty much the same thing this week, but this time around we also have Roman Reigns vs. Jinder Mahal as Reigns tries to prove that WWE is against him. It’s a fictional show remember. Let’s get to it.

Here’s last week’s show if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Titus Worldwide vs. Authors of Pain

They’re certainly varying things up around here. Akam drives Apollo into the corner to start but Crews flips forward to get away. A dropkick works a bit better but Rezar tags himself in to run Crews over from behind. Some hard knees to the ribs keep Crews in trouble and the fans want Titus.

The side slam/middle rope stomp combination gets two and it’s off to a chinlock. That’s switched to a side choke to keep things fresh until Apollo gets in an enziguri to put Rezar on one knee. The hot tag brings in Titus to a huge reaction and he knocks Rezar into the corner with a hard shoulder. A big boot to the chest gets two but Akam is right back in for the Last Chapter and the pin on Titus at 4:36.

Rating: C-. I’m so thrilled that they brought the Authors up and have them on Main Event in less than two months. I mean, it was such a great idea and they’ve been used so well. How many matches have they had on Raw so far? Two? Such is life in WWE though, especially with an act like the Authors who should be as easy of an idea as you’re going to find.

From Raw.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Baron Corbin vs. No Way Jose vs. Bobby Roode

Corbin wastes no time in sending Jose outside but Roode punches away to take over. There’s a Blockbuster for two and we take an early break. Back with Corbin knocking Jose off the apron but going after him this time to continue the beating. Roode decks Corbin and Jose is finally able to get in some offense, including a middle rope crossbody for two. The spinebuster gets two on Jose and Roode goes up for a clothesline to take him down again.

The GLORIOUS pose looks to set up the DDT but Corbin offers a distraction, allowing Jose to clothesline Roode to the floor. Corbin keeps up the clothesline train with a running version off the apron. The chokebreaker drops Jose for two and Deep Six gets the same on Roode. Jose makes a save and Corbin is sent into the post but the Glorious DDT puts Jose away at 10:43.

Rating: C+. This was a nice surprise and you could almost imagine any of the three of them getting into the ladder match. Roode isn’t the most thrilling guy in the world but he’s someone that could be in there and fit in well enough. I still like Jose and the potential is there if he can get away from the dancing stuff. Then again, I can’t imagine that happening and that’s on WWE, as usual.

We see Roman Reigns spearing Jinder Mahal through a wall to take him out of the qualifying match.

From Raw again, here is said qualifying match with Jinder’s replacement.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Elias vs. Bobby Lashley vs. ???

It’s Owens of course and he helps pound Lashley down it the corner. Lashley gets tossed and we take an early break. Back with Owens sending Lashley into the steps and dropping a backsplash on Elias for two. Lashley is back up as the fans chant for Bobby’s sisters. Elias sends Lashley outside and let’s stop for a song! He even has someone holding his mic while he plays the guitar but has to stop to knee Owens in the face.

Back in and Owens breaks up the vertical suplex on Elias so Lashley suplexes both of them at once. The fans still want to Walk With Elias and a sitout powerbomb to Owens has them rather pleased. Lashley makes a save and plants Elias but here’s Sami to pull him to the floor. Back inside, the frog splash ends Elias to send Owens on at 13:12.

Rating: C. Kind of a messy match here as these three aren’t exactly people who are going to have chemistry. Lashley’s booking continues to astound me a bit as he was supposed to be some big return and now he’s just a guy who uses a vertical suplex as a finisher. You can’t just give him the Dominator again? The match wasn’t anything special but at least the ending advances some stories and puts Owens in the ladder match.

And now, to Smackdown.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: New Day vs. The Bar

Miz is on commentary and the winning team gets to pick one member to enter the ladder match. Woods goes nuts to start and scores with a dive on Sheamus, followed by a Disaster Kick on Cesaro. Some double teaming takes him down though and it’s off to a break. Back with Woods in trouble as Sheamus knees him in the face to give Cesaro two. Woods sends Cesaro to the apron though and the hot tag brings in Big E. for some suplexes. Well some dancing too but at least it’s followed by the Warrior Splash…to Sheamus’ knees. So much for the dancing offense.

A double DDT gets two on Big E. and Cesaro grabs a Sharpshooter. Woods comes in for the save and gets in his own DDT for two. A wheelbarrow faceplant slams Cesaro into the mat so Sheamus comes in for a save this time around. Big E. spears Sheamus through the ropes, leaving Woods to drop the elbow for the pin on Cesaro at 9:25. As expected, there was no mention of Miz pinning the US Champion.

Rating: C-. In theory this should put Woods in the ladder match but I could see him saying that he doesn’t deserve it. To be fair, no one would buy Woods as a threat to win the thing so switching him out for Big E. or Kofi wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world. New Day vs. Bar has been a fine enough feud and tying something like this into it wasn’t the worst idea in the world.

Back to Raw.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Alexa Bliss vs. Mickie James vs. Bayley

Bayley gets knocked outside and we take a break less than thirty seconds in. Back with Bayley still getting double teamed and having her comeback cut off. As is customary, Mickie turns on Bliss with a rollup for two but they still get together to kick Bayley down. A double high crossbody gives Bayley an opening and a double Stunner over the ropes makes thins even worse.

Mickie gets dropped face first on the top rope but she’s still able to break up Bliss’ sunset flip. They all slug it out from their knees with Bayley getting the better of it, including ducking a shot so Bliss hits James. The Bayley to Belly gets two on Bliss with Mickie making the save. Mickie and Bayley fight on the floor but the distraction lets Bliss DDT Bayley for the pin at 9:09.

Rating: D. I wasn’t feeling this one but that’s often the case with these triple threat matches. This was the standard formula: two people get together to take over, get in a fight, and then someone gets a pin. Bliss winning is the right choice as you can have Bayley and Sasha do something else later on. Mickie and Bliss will still be friends because stuff like this never changes anything. The fans didn’t seem to care but, again, this isn’t the match that matters so the fans not being interested is expected.

And back to Smackdown again.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Becky Lynch vs. Mandy Rose vs. Sonya Deville

Mandy lets the other two fight and then jumps Becky from behind. A rollup gets two on Sonya and the argument takes us to a break. Back with Sonya hammering on Becky but a Bexploder gets her out of trouble. Mandy tries to steal the pin and gets thrown down by Sonya, who sends her to the floor.

Becky gets the better of a slugout and goes up, leaving Mandy to put Sonya in an electric chair. A missile dropkick to Mandy brings them both down but Sonya breaks up the Disarm-Her. Sonya gets kicked down again though and the Disarm-Her makes Mandy tap at 8:00 to send Becky to Money in the Bank.

Rating: C. Mandy and Sonya are getting better in the ring but neither is ready for such a big spot. Becky is someone who could be a big deal in the division for a long time to come and there’s no reason to not put her in here. You can put the Iconics in for a better performance in the heel tag role than Mandy and Sonya so there’s not much to complain about here.

We look at Nia Jax challenging Ronda Rousey for Money in the Bank.

Chad Gable vs. Mojo Rawley

I’m not sure why but this interests me. Gable takes him down without much effort and cranks on the ankle. Mojo can’t get away so we hit an armbar instead. The armbar sequel sets up a northern lights suplex for two and it’s right back to the armbar. Mojo finally takes him to the floor for a ram into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Gable being pulled into a backbreaker for two.

As you might expect, it’s off to the chinlock to keep Gable down. That’s broken up pretty quickly and Gable grabs an armbar over the ropes. Mojo misses a charge into the corner and a good looking flying forearm drops him. Mojo’s spinebuster is countered into an Oklahoma roll for two, followed by a German suplex for the same. Gable gets sent face first into the buckle though and the running right hand gives Mojo the pin at 11:38.

Rating: C. Much better than I was expecting here, if nothing else just because you don’t expect to see these two getting any kind of time. That’s what Main Event should be used for instead of the same matches over and over again, especially the repetitive cruiserweight tag matches. These guys are just sitting around so give them a chance and see what you might have.

And from Smackdown one more time to wrap it up.

AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Non-title with the winner getting to pick next week’s stipulation. The battle over a wristlock doesn’t go anywhere so AJ dropkicks him down to pick up the pace a bit. A slingshot forearm to the floor has Nakamura in more trouble but he posts AJ for a breather. Back from a break with Nakamura kicking AJ against the ropes and choking in the corner. Good Vibrations sets up a running kick to AJ’s face and we hit a dragon sleeper.

AJ fights out and puts Nakamura on top for a Pele. The running seated forearm drops Nakamura again and AJ nips up as the pace quickens. The belly to back faceplant gets two but a spinning kick to the face rocks Styles. Nakamura gets two off the Landslide (Samoan driver) but misses the running knee in the corner.

He’s fine enough to break up a springboard though and a kick to the ribs sends AJ to the apron. Kinshasa misses but AJ can’t get the Calf Crusher. The sliding knee gets two but Kinshasa is blocked with a spinwheel kick. The Phenomenal Forearm nearly hits the referee and Nakamura claims a low blow. That’s enough of a distraction to set up Kinshasa for the pin on Styles at 17:30.

Rating: B+. That’s the best match they’ve had yet and Nakamura needed to win something at some point. I’m still really not big on having a match to set up another match but this is better than a lot of the nonsense this company gives us at times. I’m not sure what the stipulation will be but they have a few options as we head towards Money in the Bank, especially with Nakamura’s quirky sense of humor at times.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event alone helped this but they really had to show every single qualifying match instead of the Intercontinental Title match? Sometimes it’s ok to just show us a recap or a highlight package instead of everything getting its own section. Then again having fewer qualifying matches would be nice as well but WWE has made it clear that they love that freaking ladder match more than almost anything else. Nice show, but mainly due to Styles vs. Nakamura being awesome.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 15, 2018
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the second night in London and this time around…it’s still mainly about Money in the Bank. Tonight will see more qualifying matches, but more importantly we’ll be getting AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura, with the winner getting to pick the stipulation for their title match at Money in the Bank. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We get a quick recap of Styles vs. Nakamura.

Here’s Daniel Bryan for a chat with Renee Young to get things going. She can barely get her questions in though as the DANIEL BRYAN chants are a bit too loud. After they die down a bit, Bryan talks about how he lost last week and no one likes losing. He’s back and willing to scratch and claw his way to the top because he wants to be WWE Champion. Cue Big Cass to mock Bryan, saying that he was Bryan’s first major setback since his return to WWE. Yeah he tapped out at Backlash, but only so he could get out of the hold to keep beating on Bryan even more.

Cass takes credit for Bryan’s loss to Rusev last week and says Bryan will never be able to do anything without a seven foot shadow following him. He gets in the ring so Bryan goes straight for the knee with a series of kicks before wrapping it around the post. Referees come out but but can’t stop Bryan from hitting a chop block and slapping on a heel hook. Good segment, now get Bryan on from Cass.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: New Day vs. The Bar

Miz is no commentary and the winning team gets to pick one member to enter the ladder match. Woods goes nuts to start and scores with a dive on Sheamus, followed by a Disaster Kick on Cesaro. Some double teaming takes him down though and it’s off to a break. Back with Woods in trouble as Sheamus knees him in the face to give Cesaro two. Woods sends Cesaro to the apron though and the hot tag brings in Big E. for some suplexes. Well some dancing too but at least it’s followed by the Warrior Splash…to Sheamus’ knees. So much for the dancing offense.

A double DDT gets two on Big E. and Cesaro grabs a Sharpshooter. Woods comes in for the save and gets in his own DDT for two. A wheelbarrow faceplant slams Cesaro into the mat so Sheamus comes in for a save this time around. Big E. spears Sheamus through the ropes, leaving Woods to drop the elbow for the pin on Cesaro at 9:25. As expected, there was no mention of Miz pinning the US Champion.

Rating: C-. In theory this should put Woods in the ladder match but I could see him saying that he doesn’t deserve it. To be fair, no one would buy Woods as a threat to win the thing so switching him out for Big E. or Kofi wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world. New Day vs. Bar has been a fine enough feud and tying something like this into it wasn’t the worst idea in the world.

The Bludgeon Brothers look at various teams and say friendship is a disease. They’re waiting.

Paige is on the phone with Carmella and says she can’t have a horse drawn carriage entrance. Mandy Rose and Sonya Deville come in and say Mandy is going to Money in the Bank. Paige says not so fast because tonight, she can have a qualifying match. That’s not cool with Sonya, who wants one too. Paige gives them both a match against Becky Lynch, which makes them think it’s a handicap match because they’re not that bright. Paige spells it out for them and they seem a bit nervous.

AJ Styles is thinking about a pole on a pole match. Or maybe a bullrope inferno Hell in a Cell match. Renee: “That’s the one where the referees dress up as Elvis right?” AJ: “…No. That’s a step too far Renee.” Nakamura may not remember English but AJ knows the international language of forearm to face.

Andrade Cien Almas vs. Jake Constantino

Must be Rico’s cousin. Jake gets in an armdrag before being knocked into the corner for the running knees. The hammerlock DDT ends Constantino at 1:19.

Post match Vega says she isn’t impressed because they’re here to take over.

Rusev Day are in the back to insult London. Aiden English has a new song for when Rusev wins Money in the Bank but Lana comes in to says she’s in a qualifying match next week too. They’ll dominate Smackdown on Rusev Day. The tension between Lana and English was gone here, almost to the level of Lana’s accent being gone.

It’s time for the Royal Mellabration and she has a town crier to introduce her. Some beef eaters bring out the title and here’s Carmella to come to the ring where there’s a big leopard print pillow for the title. Carmella orders them to cheer for her but then complains about the silence. These people will cheer for a baby outside of a hospital and now they won’t give her the same treatment? She’s champion so she’s better than everyone else and lists off a bunch of names beneath her. Cue Paige to announce Carmella vs. Asuka at Money in the Bank. Asuka comes out and Carmella panics as she leaves.

Nakamura can’t understand Renee’s questions. He’ll win tonight.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Becky Lynch vs. Mandy Rose vs. Sonya Deville

Mandy lets the other two fight and then jumps Becky from behind. A rollup gets two on Sonya and the argument takes us to a break. Back with Sonya hammering on Becky but a Bexploder gets her out of trouble. Mandy tries to steal the pin and gets thrown down by Sonya, who sends her to the floor.

Becky gets the better of a slugout and goes up, leaving Mandy to put Sonya in an electric chair. A missile dropkick to Mandy brings them both down but Sonya breaks up the Disarm-Her. Sonya gets kicked down again though and the Disarm-Her makes Mandy tap at 8:00 to send Becky to Money in the Bank.

Rating: C. Mandy and Sonya are getting better in the ring but neither is ready for such a big spot. Becky is someone who could be a big deal in the division for a long time to come and there’s no reason to not put her in here. You can put the Iconics in for a better performance in the heel tag role than Mandy and Sonya so there’s not much to complain about here.

Samoa Joe doesn’t like Big Cass targeting people smaller than him so he’ll target Cass next week in their qualifying match. He doesn’t care how big Cass is because he can be put to sleep.

The Iconics play a word association game and say Billie will beat Lana next week in the qualifying match.

AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Non-title with the winner getting to pick next week’s stipulation. The battle over a wristlock doesn’t go anywhere so AJ dropkicks him down to pick up the pace a bit. A slingshot forearm to the floor has Nakamura in more trouble but he posts AJ for a breather. Back from a break with Nakamura kicking AJ against the ropes and choking in the corner. Good Vibrations sets up a running kick to AJ’s face and we hit a dragon sleeper.

AJ fights out and puts Nakamura on top for a Pele. The running seated forearm drops Nakamura again and AJ nips up as the pace quickens. The belly to back faceplant gets two but a spinning kick to the face rocks Styles. Nakamura gets two off the Landslide (Samoan driver) but misses the running knee in the corner.

He’s fine enough to break up a springboard though and a kick to the ribs sends AJ to the apron. Kinshasa misses but AJ can’t get the Calf Crusher. The sliding knee gets two but Kinshasa is blocked with a spinwheel kick. The Phenomenal Forearm nearly hits the referee and Nakamura claims a low blow. That’s enough of a distraction to set up Kinshasa for the pin on Styles at 17:30.

Rating: B+. That’s the best match they’ve had yet and Nakamura needed to win something at some point. I’m still really not big on having a match to set up another match but this is better than a lot of the nonsense this company gives us at times. I’m not sure what the stipulation will be but they have a few options as we head towards Money in the Bank, especially with Nakamura’s quirky sense of humor at times.

No stipulation is picked to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I don’t remember the last time you could feel the difference in the presentation between the two shows like you could this week. Raw was beating us over the head with the same ideas and Roman Reigns didn’t exactly help things. This show, while not exactly a masterpiece, focused on some other stuff outside of Money in the Bank and didn’t have a really dumb story as a bonus. It’s amazing how much easier that is to sit through and it made for a better show. I know Raw isn’t going to change, but it’s not hard to see why this show is better.

Results

New Day b. The Bar – Top rope elbow to Cesaro

Andrade Cien Almas b. Jake Constantino – Hammerlock DDT

Becky Lynch b. Mandy Rose and Sonya Deville – Disarm-Her to Rose

Shinsuke Nakamura b. AJ Styles – Kinshasa

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: May 1, 2018
Location: Bell Center, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re still in Montreal and this time around it’s the go home show for Backlash. The big story tonight is Shinsuke Nakamura demanding an apology from AJ Styles. Other than that we need to build up Backlash quite a bit, but there’s so much fallout from the Greatest Royal Rumble to get through first. Let’s get to it.

Here are the Greatest Royal Rumble Results if you need a recap.

We open with a look at Shane McMahon being chokeslammed through the announcers’ table by Braun Strowman.

Paige says that Shane won’t be here tonight before recapping AJ vs. Nakamura from Friday. As for Backlash, the title match is now No DQ.

It’s time for MizTV. Miz cuts the fans chanting for Maryse off by saying he took her to Hollywood. That brings him to his Intercontinental Title match on Sunday with Seth Rollins. Jeff Hardy is the guest tonight so we’re ready to go. Miz won’t shake Jeff’s hand because he just high fived all of these dirty Montreal fans. First question: does Jeff think Miz is a better Intercontinental Champion than Seth Rollins.

Jeff agrees, if you want a champion who is self obsessed and annoying. Miz isn’t pleased with that and throws it to a clip of Randy Orton taking Jeff’s place against Shelton Benjamin last week. He’d like to know what Orton thinks of that so here’s Randy Orton as the second guest. Orton doesn’t think much of it because Jeff did the same the week before. Miz brings up the superstar rating scale from a few months ago, which had Orton ranked ninth. Orton: “I don’t think anybody cares about any Smackdown Top Ten list.” Preach it brother.

Jeff says it was Sunil Singh costing Orton the match last week but Miz disagrees. Orton doesn’t like Miz stirring the pot like this and says he’s taking the title back at Backlash. They seem cool but here’s Shelton Benjamin to say he deserves the title shot. Orton kicks him down and Jeff gives Miz the Whisper in the Wind.

Jeff Hardy/Randy Orton vs. Shelton Benjamin/The Miz

Joined in progress (because WWE knows one way to follow up on segments like that) with Hardy stomping on Benjamin. It’s off to Orton for an RKO attempt but Shelton dropkicks him down for a delayed two. Miz comes in and the fans aren’t happy to see him. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Orton suplexes his way out and it’s off to Hardy. The basement dropkick gets two and the Skull Crushing Finale is countered into a rollup for two.

Miz is sent outside so Jeff gives Benjamin a Twisting Stunner but Shelton knees him in the face to break up the Swanton. Back from a break with Miz holding Jeff in a chinlock but he fights out with a jawbreaker. Another takedown to Shelton is enough for the hot tag to Orton. House is cleaned in a hurry with the double DDT to Miz and Benjamin. The powerslam brings Jeff back in for the Swanton and the pin on Benjamin at 11:57.

Rating: C. Just a tag match here but I’m getting tired of these thrown together tag matches. Come up with something better than doing the same thing over and over again. It’s not bad or anything, but we’ve seen it before. At least they set up another title match for Sunday, even if it’s not something I’m really interested in seeing. Hardy pinning Orton would be a nice boost for his recharged singles push.

Post match Orton hits Hardy with a quick RKO.

The Iconics make fun of Renee Young but she defends her Canadian accent. They brag about winning last week and tell Renee to go chase a moose because they have this. Billie brings in Carmella for the interview so she can brag about beating Charlotte. She’ll do it again on Sunday and they’ll even win in their six woman tag tonight.

We hear Daniel Bryan say he thought he could win on Friday but he didn’t lose because he was tired. He lost because he couldn’t get Braun Strowman out of the ring. His chest is nearly destroyed and the doctors have kept him out of the ring tonight due to a possible infection.

The Bar has their Smackdown contracts and brag about being the new force around here. New Day shows up with a plate of pancakes for them but the Bar throws them away, fearing some, ahem, added ingredients. That’s too far for New Day so Sheamus challenges Xavier Woods for a match tonight. Woods agrees, saying that Sheamus’ soul belongs to him.

Rusev Day is trying to come up with a new song but Lana, in a Rusev Day shirt, comes in to interrupt them. She asks to speak to Rusev alone and says Rusev is missing something to get him over the top. Rusev doesn’t get what she means and oh hi again English.

Here’s Big Cass with something to say. He’s from New York City and that means a few things, including that he’s better than all of us. Cass yells that he’s better than anyone here, just like he’s better than Daniel Bryan. He’s seven foot tall and powerful, which is everything Bryan isn’t.

On Sunday, you’re not getting a five star match because it’s going to be five seconds long. He doesn’t need wristlocks or a YES Lock or even time to prepare. Cass wants Bryan right now…and here’s a miniature Bryan. Cass makes short jokes and tells him to wave to the fans. The big boot and right hands follow until referees come out. Words can’t do justice for how stupid this idea is and always has been.

Here’s AJ Styles to talk to Renee Young in the ring. AJ says he’s trying to defend the title and Nakamura is more interested in the wrong jewels. Now Nakamura wants a public apology so AJ should have left him sucking sand in the desert. He’s fine with the No DQ stipulation on Sunday because AJ can break rules too. On Sunday, a low blow will be the least of Nakamura’s worries. If Nakamura wants an apology, he can come get one.

Cue Samoa Joe to say that AJ needs to pay better attention to the more important match. After he puts Reigns to sleep on Sunday, he’s coming for whoever leaves with the WWE Championship. Oh….I think I can go for this. Nakamura’s music hits and Joe is ready but we cut to the ring where Nakamura hits AJ low again. Kinshasa knocks AJ silly for good measure and Nakamura holds up the title. I fully support Joe becoming more involved with the World Title situation.

Becky Lynch isn’t happy with what happened last week and is sorry for costing Asuka her first match on Smackdown. Asuka is next to her and says they’ll hit back three times harder. Charlotte wants to destroy the Iconics and Asuka says Avengers Assemble.

Sheamus vs. Xavier Woods

Sheamus knocks him into the corner so Woods comes back with a dropkick and speeds things up. Another dropkick puts Sheamus outside for a running flip dive. A Cesaro distraction lets Sheamus get in a knee lift and we take a break. Back with Sheamus cranking on the arm to keep Woods down even longer.

Woods fights up and slugs away before sending a charging Sheamus shoulder first into the post. A twisting legdrop gets two and there’s a Shining Wizard to rock Sheamus again. Cesaro and Big E. get into it on the floor and the distraction lets Woods grab a quick small package for the pin at 10:27.

Rating: D+. The ending was as obvious as you could get but at least the actual tag matches should be fun. Woods winning matches is almost weird, even though he’s not that bad in the ring. The problem is he has no singles success compared to Kofi and Big E., but he’s still a good enough addition to the team to keep things balanced.

We look at Mandy Rose and Sonya Deville ripping on Becky Lynch last week but referees broke it up.

Mandy and Sonya come in to see Paige for an Absolution reunion. They’re happy with the new boss and want to know which of them will be getting the Women’s Title match. Paige picks Mandy but it’s really just a match with Becky next week. Sonya wants to know what’s going on so Paige breaks the news to her: Absolution is dead.

Zelina Vega says Andrade Cien Almas will come when he feels like it.

Backlash rundown.

Charlotte/Becky Lynch/Asuka vs. Iconics/Carmella

Carmella tries to hide from Charlotte to start and brings in Peyton to face Becky. Peyton is taken down in short order and Becky does a little dance before it’s off to Billie. Asuka comes in and takes her into the corner….where Billie thinks slapping Asuka is a good idea. Charlotte: “SHE’S GONNA KILL YOU!”

Charlotte comes in and dives onto the Iconics, sending Carmella running as we take a break. Back with Becky cleaning house and handing it off to Charlotte for more of the same. The numbers game catches up with Charlotte though and we hit the chinlock. Therefore, GET THAT INSET PROMO GOING! Charlotte fights up as we’re back to full screen and a kick to the chest knocks Carmella away.

Asuka tags herself in and hip attacks everyone to the floor. A kick to the head drops Peyton for two and everything breaks down. Charlotte spears Carmella (who sits down instead of flying backwards) and moonsaults out to the floor onto all three. Peyton gets thrown back inside and tries an O’Connor roll, only to get reversed into the Asuka Lock for the tap at 13:24.

Rating: C+. I’m usually not a fan of this kind of booking but I’m really, really hoping that they put the title back on Charlotte. I really have no interest in having Charlotte do the “I’m better than you but you keep escaping with the title” stuff with Carmella for months on end. The briefcase continues to be such a lame booking crutch and it’s all they have here, which is really quite annoying. Just get past this already and let us do something better.

Overall Rating: C-. This felt like another show where they were taking the night off because they were still worn out from all the travel. But hey, at least we have another FOUR HOUR pay per view on Sunday, because remember the WWE philosophy: more means better! The talking was good here but egads it feels like there’s been a two hour show every day for weeks now. Next week can’t get here soon enough so we can calm things down a bit because you can tell everyone is worn out at the moment.

Results

Jeff Hardy/Randy Orton b. Shelton Benjamin/The Miz – Swanton Bomb to Benjamin

Xavier Woods b. Sheamus – Small package

Charlotte/Becky Lynch/Asuka b. Iconics/Carmella – Asuka Lock to Royce

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Mixed Match Challenge
Date: March 27, 2018
Location: PPG Paints Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Beth Phoenix, Corey Graves

We’re down to the home stretch here with just two shows left. This week’s was supposed to feature Bobby Roode/Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks/Finn Balor but a bad dental issue is keeping Charlotte out of the match. Since it’s WWE though, they have a substitute on hand with three possible options to take Charlotte’s place. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We waste no time in announcing Becky Lynch as the replacement, beating out Lana and Carmella.

Video on Banks and Balor with some Special Olympians, their represented charity.

Semifinals: Becky Lynch/Bobby Roode vs. Sasha Banks/Finn Balor

The guys start us off with Balor not being able to flip out of a wristlock. A headscissors escape makes Roode laugh and they exchange poses. It’s off to Becky vs. Sasha (the big showdown here) with Becky scoring off some armdrags but neither being willing to throw a punch. That changes in short order as they won’t shake hands so Banks hammers away on the mat.

Roode and Balor head back in with Bobby getting the better of it this time around and grabbing a waistlock. Balor comes back with a Pele Kick and the women are back in with an exchange of shots to the face. Banks misses the running knees in the corner and gets kicked to the apron.

A superplex drops Banks again but it’s back to Balor vs. Roode instead of Becky covering. Something like Eye of the Hurricane gets two on Roode but he’s back up with a Blockbuster for the same. Banks hits the top rope knees on Becky and then dives through the ropes onto Roode. Back in and Becky grabs a small package for the fast pin at 11:13.

Rating: C. The wrestling was acceptable here and Becky is more than fine for a replacement. The big thing here though was they treated Banks vs. Lynch like a big deal, which was the right way to focus rather than fairly uninteresting Roode vs. Balor stuff. At least Charlotte will be back for the final, which should be a big deal.

Post match Kurt Angle, the hometown boy, comes out to hype next week’s finale.

Overall Rating: C+. We’re in the very final home stretch and the tournament doesn’t feel like it’s been going that long. As has been mentioned several times now, the shows being this short is such a relief as they don’t waste time and get to the point. I had a good time watching this and the final could be very interesting, especially as a Wrestlemania preview.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Mixed Match Challenge Episode #3
Date: January 30, 2018
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Beth Phoenix

We’re back with another week and that means another mixed tag match, albeit after some entertaining promos. The interesting thing about this so far has been a pretty weak live audience but a rather strong audience of people watching later. That being said, the audience is tuning in to watch later, meaning there is an interest in the show. Let’s get to it.

You can vote on whether you want Becky Lynch or Sami Zayn to start the match. Gah with these people who don’t know wrestling making strategy decisions.

Earlier today, Lynch and Zayn met with some UNICEF representatives and did a little dance.

Earlier today, Braun Strowman gave Alexa Bliss, in a Braun sized shirt, car flipping lessons. Strowman broke down the physics of it and Bliss left, saying she had a better idea. What that idea is isn’t explained, but this was funny.

First Round: Sami Zayn/Becky Lynch vs. Alexa Bliss/Braun Strowman

Sami is in full on face mode here, minus the dancing strut to the ring. Strowman and Bliss continue to be the most awesomely cute team ever, with Strowman holding his hand up for a high five so the short Bliss has to jump. Sami and Becky snap their fingers at them and it’s Becky winning the poll to start the match. Becky takes Bliss down to start and rubs her head but the Disarm-Her sends Bliss bailing to the ropes.

Back up and Becky does Sami’s dance, sending Sami into hysterics on the apron. Becky grabs a Tumbleweed and neither of them can stand up straight, sending Bliss to the wrong corner for a tag. For some reason isn’t not off to Strowman, even though the fans want to see him.

Bliss decides to slap Braun for a tag so Sami calls him a meathead. In the smartest thing he could do, Sami bails to the floor and calls Strowman a chicken for not following him. The chase is on but Sami gets caught, only to slip out and IMMEDIATELY tag Becky back in. Bliss’ cheap shot works well enough and we’re off to the chinlock. We use the time to look at Bobby Roode and Charlotte live chatting the show as a RUSEV DAY chant starts up.

Sami starts the crowd on a chorus of HAPPY BIRTHDAY for Becky (thankfully appropriate or it’s a rather odd choice), drawing her to her feet for the hot tag. Strowman misses a charge and falls to the floor, only to catch Sami’s dive without much effort. Sami gets launched over the barricade and Becky is posted, setting up the skyscraper Twisted Bliss (off Braun’s shoulders) for the pin on Becky at 11:13.

Rating: B. This was a lot of fun as the teams were clearly having a blast setting it up. Strowman and Bliss are as adorable of a team as you can get and Lynch and Zayn are basically the mirror images of each other. You could tell they were having a great time out there and that’s a lot easier to sit through than a boring by the numbers match.

Jimmy Uso and Naomi don’t care who Goldust has to replace the injured Alicia Fox because they’ll feel the Glow in the Uso Penitentiary.

Goldust’s new partner: Mandy Rose. Works for me.

Strowman and Bliss say this was a team effort, and they even find each other cute. Bliss: “We’re going all the way.” Braun’s face is hilarious as he has the biggest creepy smile ever until Bliss explains what she means. Again: fun.

Overall Rating: B+. This was probably more about the wrestlers involved but I had a great time with this show. They were having fun and the promos before the match made things even better. Also, just like the previous weeks, they were in and out in the span of twenty two minutes. Let these guys show some more personality and this show will be a lot easier to watch (even though it’s one of the easiest in wrestling at the moment).

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/26/new-book-kbs-history-of-the-wwe-championship-2018-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 2016
Date: January 24, 2016
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 15,170
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

Now this one actually has my interest for a change. A year ago, WWE decided that the right idea was to have WWE World Champion Roman Reigns fight everyone in a single match for the title. This is completely different as now he fights everyone for the US Title. Anyway, the whole thing is about the main event, as it should be, so let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Mark Henry/Jack Swagger vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Darren Young/Damien Sandow vs. Ascension

One fall to a finish and the winners go to the Rumble. I can’t help but call JBL cute for suggesting that any of these four have a chance to win the Rumble. The fans want Sandow and just EXPLODE when he actually gets the tag. The Wind-Up Elbow gets two on Swagger before it’s off to Young so the crowd can die all over again. Konnor tags himself in and it’s a big eight way standoff as we take a break.

Back with Swagger powerslamming Konnor as we hear about the fans wanting some Sandow. D-Von gets crotched against the post so the fans change up to wanting Sexual Chocolate. Henry obliges with a hip swivel, which will probably get him fined for not focusing enough or some jazz like that. A D-VON chant gets him back to his feet because we need a long chinlock in a match that doesn’t break eight minutes and has eight participants. Bubba comes in off the hot tag and cleans house with Young taking Wazzup. 3D gets two on Viktor but Henry steals the pin at 7:58.

Rating: D. This wasn’t great but it did everything it needed to do. At the end of the day, other than MAYBE the Dudleyz, Swagger and Henry were the only pairing that made sense here. Just let us have two former World Champions in there to fill in a few spots. It’s not like anyone wanted to see Young or Ascension (a sign in the crowd called them today’s joke and I can’t say I disagree) in there so go with what makes sense.

Vince and Stephanie McMahon show up in a limo (So they’re good at this point. Got it.) and talk about how awesome tonight is going to be and how fair it is to Reigns. Vince loves the idea, almost as much as he loves himself.

The opening video recaps the only thing that matters here with the tagline of One vs. All. I liked that last year and I still do.

Intercontinental Title: Kevin Owens vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and this is last man standing. They go right after each other to start with Dean hammering away and biting Owens’ head before scoring with the bulldog out of the corner. What looks like a tablet to the head gives Owens a breather and a superkick sets up the Cannonball through the barricade. A few chair shots keep Dean in trouble and Owens has a seat as the champ gets up.

Two chairs are set up in the middle of the ring but, just like putting a chair in the corner, whoever sets them up goes through them, meaning Ambrose backdrops him through the chairs. A suicide dive is countered into a ram into the apron followed by a whip into the steps for about a seven. With Ambrose getting up again, Owens loads up two tables on top of each other but the superplex is blocked, meaning we’ll get back to the big crash later.

Dirty Deeds gets eight on Owens and another one onto a chair sends Owens rolling to the floor to land on his feet at nine. Eh that’s kind of clever. The fans want Owens to fight (multiple times even) but Dean elbows him through a table. That’s still not enough so Dean says he hates Owens. Kevin: “I hate you too!” Back in and Owens’ swinging fisherman’s superplex sends Dean through another table to give Kevin a nine count. Owens lays Dean on a set of chairs but the champ pops up and shoves him through the double tables to retain at 20:50.

Rating: B+. It’s no masterpiece but this is the kind of show that only needs one great match to be a classic, making this a bonus. The big spot at the end was a good choice and I kind of like that over a finisher onto something made of metal. It’s a good match and a good way to open things up since the rest of the card is just a way to get to the main event.

We recap heel New Day (what a weird concept, though they’re rapidly turning face here) vs. the Usos, which has involved Chris Jericho destroying Francesca to freak Woods out.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Usos

New Day is defending (of course) and there’s no Woods. Kofi asks for a moment of silence for Francesca but here’s Woods with a new trombone named Francesca II. See, he’s in mourning but a man has, ahem, needs. This isn’t it for them tonight though as New Day wants the World Title so 2016 can be all gold everything. Kofi: “GOLDEN UNICORNS!” Woods: “Stay golden pony boy.”

The twins take over to start and the fans aren’t all that thrilled. A jawbreaker puts Jimmy down and it’s off to Big E. for some hip swiveling, only to have Jey dropkick him into the barricade. Woods proves his worth to the team by dropping Jey to take over again. Sometimes it’s a bit harder to get rid of those old heel tendencies you see. The fans demand a Francesca performance but Woods plays when he wants to, which isn’t while Kofi has Jey in a chinlock.

The Warrior Splash gives Big E. two as JBL talks about NFL coin flips. A spinning enziguri drops Kofi and there’s the hot tag to Jimmy so house can be cleaned. Normally the fans are a bit more enthusiastic about that but New Day is just WAY too popular here for fans to get behind the Usos.

Everything breaks down and a Whisper in the Wind gets two on Big E. A belly to belly gets the same on Jey but the spear through the ropes is blocked by a raised knee. Why not just step to the side? The second attempt works a bit better but it’s too early for the Midnight Hour. Jey superkicks Kofi into the Superfly Splash for two as a foot goes on the rope. Kofi eats another superkick but a blind tag brings in Big E. for the Big Ending to retain at 10:52.

Rating: B-. This took some time to get rolling but once everything broke down, it was as good as you would expect from these teams. New Day is clearly the future of the division despite being champs for nearly five months at this point. Catching a top rope splash out of the air is really impressive as the champs continue to show that they have the ring work to back up their charisma.

We look back at Brock Lesnar beating up the League of Nations, followed by Reigns spearing Brock. The Wyatts then beat Reigns and Brock up to make themselves a threat for later tonight.

The Wyatts say they’ll win the title for Bray tonight. Singing ensues.

US Title: Kalisto vs. Alberto Del Rio

Kalisto is challenging and they’ve been trading the title for a few weeks now. Kalisto starts fast with the strikes to send him outside for a suicide dive. Now you might think this is competitive, but JBL is right there to hammer in the ideas that David NEVER beats Goliath and that Kalisto is going to get destroyed. You know, in case you’re dumb enough to not get the idea here.

Back in and Del Rio kicks him down, followed by a top rope ax handle for two. That means JBL gets to talk about how fun it is to beat up luchadors. Two knees to the ribs have Kalisto in more trouble and it’s time to go after the mask. There’s some good heel psychology in there about someone with Del Rio knowing the tradition of the mask and going after it anyway but the announcers gloss over it.

Del Rio’s low superkick gets two and Kalisto gets the same off a springboard tornado DDT. Kalisto goes up top but gets caught in a reverse superplex. They HORRIBLY botch a Code Red (the sunset bomb) so Kalisto goes straight to the Salida Del Sol for two. Del Rio unhooks a turnbuckle pad and of course he goes into it, setting up another Salida Del Sol for the pin and the title at 11:32.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but the commentary was driving me crazy here. JBL kept talking about how there was NO WAY the smaller guy could win and that’s exactly what we saw happening. There’s a difference between setting up an idea and just hammering it into the ground, which is what we had here. The match itself was fine but I do wonder how they screwed up Kalisto. He might not have been a future World Champion but he’s someone that could have been a fixture in the midcard. Instead, he’s just a guy on the roster because we needed to feed him to Rusev down the line. You know, to feed him to Reigns.

Pre-show recap.

Paul Heyman comes up to Stephanie and says they can renegotiate Lesnar’s contract after he wins the Rumble. Stephanie is cool with that as long as Reigns is taken to Suplex City. Why she hates Reigns isn’t clear but I’d assume it’s because she just feels like it at the moment.

Recap of Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch. They were best friends but Charlotte won the title and realized she didn’t need Becky anymore. Becky talked Ric Flair into accepting the title shot for his daughter and we’re ready to roll.

Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch

Charlotte is defending and has her dad with her. Feeling out process to start with Charlotte shouldering her down. Becky goes right for the arm and the fans are entirely behind her. The announcers explain the Figure Eight as Charlotte grabs an armbar of her own. Back up and a kick to the chest puts Charlotte on the floor where Ric gets in Becky’s way. A clothesline drops the champ again so Flair kisses Becky for your weekly case of sexual assault (edited off the Network).

Charlotte takes over and grabs a cravate as the fans are WAY behind Becky here. Like moreso than usual. Thankfully Charlotte mocks the chants before doing the headscissor faceplants followed by the Figure Four necklock. Becky gets out and starts firing off dropkicks to take over but a neckbreaker puts Charlotte right back in control.

The Bexploder gets two and Charlotte’s spear gets the same. You can hear Flair freaking out as only he can and it wouldn’t be the same without that screaming. Becky gets a cross armbreaker out of the corner and the fans get right back into this, only to have a powerbomb break the hold to give Charlotte two. The Disarm-Her goes on but Flair throws his jacket at Becky for the distraction, allowing Charlotte to get another spear to retain at 11:34.

Rating: B. Another good match between the two of them but I’m really starting to roll my eyes at Flair’s interference. We get the concept already and there’s no need to keep doing it over and over. At some point Charlotte needs to drop him and once that happens, she’s going to go through the roof, which would turn out to be in a bigger way than anyone could have expected.

Charlotte beats on Becky post match but here’s Sasha Banks for the save and Bank Statement on the champ. Cole: “Sasha Banks making a statement with the Bank Statement!” I bet he spent two weeks coming up with that one.

Some fans went to the Performance Center under the ruse of being part of a focus group. The wound up getting to meet a full tour of the facility and met most of the NXT roster. Note to self: sign up for focus groups.

Rumble By the Numbers video, which is still one of my favorite annual traditions. This is tied in with the stats that Reigns, who is entering at #1, has to overcome to retain the title.

WWE World Title: Royal Rumble

Reigns is defending and comes in at #1, making the tagline One vs. All. We have 90 second intervals here and that’s rarely a good thing. I had forgotten about Reigns’ through the crowd entrance and how unfitting it was. Can you imagine him trying to pull that today without getting pummeled? Anyway Reigns is in at #2 and Rusev is in at #2, which is smart as they had an awesome final section to a battle royal on Smackdown back in 2015. They start slugging it out and even JBL knows they can’t keep up this pace. Rusev gets in a spinwheel kick but can’t throw him out. Well not over the top at least as he sends Roman through the ropes instead. The spear however is enough to put Rusev out as the clock begins.

And then, in perhaps the dumbest production decision I’ve ever seen in WWE, the camera stays on Reigns’ face as AJ STYLES makes his debut at #3. Like literally, the camera just locks in on Reigns as the crowd freaks out. They even posted a different cut of this on the WWE YouTube page because it was such a stupid visual. Thanks to the entrance taking forever, we only have time for AJ to not be able to hit the Styles Clash and a Samoan drop planting AJ.

Tyler Breeze is in at #4 and the fans are COMPLETELY behind AJ, which isn’t all that surprising. Breeze scores with a few right hands before a pretty unnecessary double team gets rid of him. Curtis Axel (with the WAY too over Social Outcasts) is in at #5 to send AJ into the buckle, earning himself some forearms to the face. Reigns gets back up and the Outcasts are beaten down until AJ clotheslines Axel out (JBL: “The chains are back on.”). Chris Jericho is in at #6 and we’ve got a snappy triple threat going here.

AJ gets knocked down and Reigns is sent into the post, leaving Styles to have to fight out of the Walls. Kane is in at #7 and Cole is WAY too fast to call him the greatest performer in the Rumble’s history. Wouldn’t it have helped if he had actually WON THE THING a time or two Cole? Styles goes right after the monster but gets kicked down and all four head to a corner until Goldust is in at #8. Not a lot happens here other than the fans chanting for AJ even more because he debuted as a star, which only a handful of people get to do. Ryback is in at #9 and gets to clean house without eliminating anyone.

AJ clotheslines Reigns in the corner to another big pop and it’s Kofi Kingston in at #10 (with New Day staying at ringside) so we can just start the clock for the big save. At the moment we have Reigns, Styles, Jericho, Kane, Goldust, Ryback and Kingston. AJ comes off the top to hit Jericho and it’s Titus O’Neil in at #11. Styles and Jericho take backbreakers and Goldust is tossed. Kofi almost gets rid of Reigns and is somehow even more popular than he’s been all night.

R-Truth is in at #12 and of course he pulls out a ladder and climbs up to retrieve….nothing. I forgot how much I enjoyed Truth’s confused gimmick. Kane pulls him down and tosses him out before throwing the ladder out as a bonus. A clothesline puts Kofi over the top and right onto Big E.’s shoulders for the big save. Eh not as good as some I’ve seen but you can’t have a classic every year. Luke Harper is in at #13 and here are Vince and the League of Nations to pull Roman to the floor (under the ropes of course). The champ is sent into the steps and kicked in the face by multiple members of the team.

This goes on so long that Stardust comes in at #14. Rusev splashes Reigns through the table as we have NO IDEA what is going on in the ring during all this. While we were gone, Jericho eliminated Kingston which was of course ignored by the announcers. Now for the stupid part: Vince and the Nation JUST LEAVES.

Like, they don’t throw him inside and then back out. They don’t pay someone off to get rid of Reigns. They don’t do anything but leave while Reigns is taken out on a stretcher. You would think Vince would have learned his lesson from Steve Austin in 1999 but he’s a heel so this is just really stupid instead of head caving in stupid. Big Show comes in at #15 and eliminates Titus and Ryback, giving us a lineup of Reigns (being taken out), Styles, Jericho, Kane, Harper, Stardust and Show. Reigns is now walking in front of the stretcher, making this even less of a good idea.

Styles escapes a chokeslam and it’s Neville in at #16. The rapid fire kicks stagger some people as Reigns is shown WALKING TO THE BACK UNDER HIS OWN POWER. What a hero he certainly is. Braun Strowman is in at #17 and hopefully some people are about to be tossed. Strowman casually eliminates Kane and has the showdown with Big Show. The standing choke (what a stupid move) knocks Show out and Strowman eliminates him a few seconds later.

A limping Kevin Owens is in at #18 and that’s good for one heck of a pop. Styles is there to meet him and you know the fans are into that. Neville throws AJ to the apron and Kevin adds a superkick to get rid of Styles, making himself a full on heel once again. Dean Ambrose is in at #19 and Owens is waiting on him to keep up the brawl from earlier. Since there’s nothing like a Royal Rumble for the World Title going on, let’s look at the Reigns beatdown from earlier.

Sami Zayn is in at #20 for a main roster cameo and of course he goes after Owens in a slugout. Kevin is gone in a hurry and we’ve got Reigns (not in the ring), Harper, Stardust, Jericho, Zayn, Ambrose, Neville and Strowman. Erick Rowan joins the field at #21 as the Wyatts are strong in this one. Harper and Rowan get together to get rid of Stardust and Neville as Strowman chokes Jericho out.

Mark Henry is in at #22 and is eliminated by the Wyatts in less than a minute. Strowman tosses Sami leaving Ambrose and Jericho to fight the monsters. Cole: “I don’t see any help coming anytime soon.” The clock is ticking down as he says this so you know it’s going to be someone big. As you might expect, Brock Lesnar is in at #23 and the place just goes NUTS.

It’s time for some suplexes with Harper and Rowan flying across the ring (not eliminated). It takes three clotheslines to drop Strowman and there goes Rowan. Harper takes a German suplex but Brock can’t suplex Strowman. Now THAT is a rub. Braun goes shoulder first into the post and another clothesline puts him down. Jack Swagger is in at #24 and lasts about fifteen seconds before Lesnar gets rid of him. More suplexes abound as Lesnar is rapidly running out of things to do.

The Miz is in at #25, giving us Reigns (you know the drill by now), Jericho, Harper, Strowman, Ambrose, Lesnar and Miz, who walks around for a bit before going in to face Brock. He actually gets on commentary and threatens to turn Disney World into Mizney World. Harper takes another German suplex and Strowman gets shouldered in the corner. That’s enough to get rid of Harper and Alberto Del Rio is in at #26. Alberto and Dean double team Lesnar in the corner and are promptly launched across the ring. Some clotheslines get rid of Strowman and the fans are VERY pleased.

Bray Wyatt gets lucky #27 and the other three Wyatts all get back in to pummel Brock. Brock tosses the three eliminated guys out again and suplexes Bray but Harper saves the F5 with a kick to the chest (or face if you’re Cole). Unlike Vince and the League (who did almost the same thing earlier), Bray is smart enough to ELIMINATE BROCK, who responds by……calmly walking away instead of, you know, breaking people in half and making a throw rug out of their entrails.

Dolph Ziggler is in at #28 and it’s FINALLY time for Miz to get in. A Skull Crushing Finale plants Dolph but Miz can’t put him out. Sheamus is in at #29 but Reigns jumps him in the aisle, over twenty four minutes after he left and over HALF AN HOUR after the beatdown started. Naturally he’s booed out of the building but still manages to get rid of Del Rio. I get that they’re trying to repeat the 1999 Royal Rumble and ignoring the fact that they’re copying the worst Rumble of all time, but there’s a big stretch between the biggest star of all time and Roman Reigns.

Anyway Roman fights Bray for a bit and it’s HHH in at #30 for one of the most obvious “swerves” in recent history. The final group is Reigns, Jericho, Ambrose, Wyatt, Ziggler, Sheamus and HHH, who gets a HUGE pop because the fans have a way out of Reigns winning the whole thing. Why the announcers have HHH stats despite him being A COMPLETE SURPRISE isn’t clear but we’ll chalk it up to the regular way of making it clear that this is entirely staged.

HHH and Reigns do the big staredown and the top heel is suddenly the big hero because that’s how little people care about Reigns. Ziggler charges into a Pedigree like a goof and Wyatt takes a spear so Reigns can have equal power. The facebuster looks to set up a Pedigree on Reigns but Sheamus and Ambrose throw them both to the apron. Jericho bulldogs Bray down and hits a Lionsault but takes a Zig Zag. A superkick can’t knock HHH off the apron and he gets back in to eliminate Ziggler a few seconds later.

Bray and HHH have a very interesting staredown which isn’t likely to go anywhere. Sheamus saves HHH from Sister Abigail and Bray is tossed. Dean and Sheamus fight for a bit until Jericho dives on Ambrose. A Codebreaker puts HHH down but Dean eliminates Jericho to get us down to four. Dean eats a Brogue Kick but sidesteps a charge to get rid of Sheamus, followed by HHH eliminating Reigns to the pop of the night.

So we’re down to Ambrose vs. HHH and Reigns stays on the floor instead out helping his buddy due to a combination of stupidity, honor and plot convenience. The rebound lariat (which Cole calls, I kid you not, the Wacky Line) has HHH in trouble and Dean sends him to the apron, only to be backdropped to the floor to make HHH the winner and champion at 1:01:42.

Rating: A-. This one took a good while to get going but once Reigns left, everything picked up. That’s where everything starts falling apart. This match is all about Reigns and the problem is very simple: people don’t seem to like him. It says a lot that Jericho lasted 51 minutes and Reigns officially went 58 though only one of them needed half an hour of rest. That right there is proof positive that Reigns probably isn’t going to be get cheered most of the time. This made him look very lame and that’s one of the worst things you can do to a star. Having him WALK OUT OF THE ARENA was just horrible and the worst possible idea.

The rest of the match was pretty awesome though as you had everyone fighting over the title. Unfortunately there are some major holes, such as Brock just walking away and having to wait for Reigns to come back. It’s not the best Rumble of all time as Reigns loomed over the whole thing but having the title on the line was a great idea and something I wish they did more often than every twenty four years. Give us some better options for the possible winner and ANYTHING other than Reigns vs. HHH as the big story and this is one of the best of all time.

HHH and family celebrate as fireworks take us out.

Overall Rating: A. This was a one match show and anything else worth watching on the show (such as the opener) was going to be more than enough to make this awesome. While it wound up setting the stage for the worst Wrestlemania in a long time, at least we have an awesome Royal Rumble to get us there. WWE had a lot of potential at this point, especially considering all the injuries they had at the time. It’s a strong Rumble, assuming you ignore the completely backwards reactions for Reigns.

Ratings Comparison

Mark Henry/Jack Swagger vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Darren Young/Damien Sandow vs. Ascension

Original: D+

Redo: D

Dean Ambrose vs. Kevin Owens

Original: B

Redo: B+

New Day vs. Usos

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kalisto

Original: C

Redo: C+

Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch:

Original: C-

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: A-

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: A

What was up with me hating the women like that?

Here’s the original rating if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/01/24/royal-rumble-2016-this-rumble-game-thing/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the 2018 Updated Version of the History of the WWE Championship in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/26/new-book-kbs-history-of-the-wwe-championship-2018-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: September 19, 2017
Location: Oracle Arena, Oakland, California
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

I’m getting used to this idea of having title matches booked in advance of the TV shows. This time around we have the US Title on the line as AJ Styles defends against Baron Corbin, who said he was answering this week’s Open Challenge in advance. And there’s that whole Kevin Owens attempting to murder Vince McMahon deal. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the ending of last week’s show with Owens destroying Mr. McMahon in a heck of a beatdown.

Here’s Shane McMahon to open things up. He calls his father one salty SOB, which is really not a nice thing to say about your grandmother. Last week Shane sat with his kids and watched his father and their grandfather get the beating of a lifetime. Shane talks about the family’s toughness and condemns him to a beating of a lifetime inside the Cell.

Randy Orton vs. Aiden English

English sings about Orton hearing voices in his head because it’s full of lead. Orton wastes no time by hitting the powerslam in the first minute but Aiden slips out of the hanging DDT. They head outside with English dropping him onto the announcers’ table as we take a break. Back with Orton fighting out of a chinlock but getting dropkicked right back down. English goes to the second rope….and dives right into the RKO for the pin at 7:10.

Rating: C-. I could go for more of English getting in some offense as the singing character is something that could get him a nice little run. It’s not like they have anything else going on so give it a try. Orton is likely going to continue his “feud” with Rusev, which will hopefully last longer than fifteen seconds next time.

Post match here’s Rusev to talk about Orton turning his homecoming into a national disgrace. Rusev is going to change things right now….and let’s ring the bell.

Rusev vs. Randy Orton

English distracts Orton and it’s a superkick to end Orton at 11 seconds. I WAS KIDDING ABOUT THE FIFTEEN SECONDS THING!!! That sounds like payback for what happened at Summerslam, which is still a dumb idea, especially if Orton wins in a long match at the pay per view. Just give Rusev a win or two that matters and things will be better, not just having this stuff that means nothing more than a fluke.

Rusev is very excited with the win and says he’ll return home as a conquering hero.

Here are Jinder Mahal and the Singh Brothers to make fun of Shinsuke Nakamura’s face again, including his mad and artistic faces. Mahal makes fun of Nakamura’s voice and hair, followed by some Mr. Miyagi jokes. Fans: “THAT’S TOO FAR!” We get some Punjabi and that’s about it. Aside from probably being racist, this showed that these two have nothing to say to each other and are only fighting because one of them has the title.

Nakamura says it won’t be so funny when he wins the title.

Here’s AJ Styles for his title defense but before the match, AJ says Kevin has bitten off more than he can chew. He attacked the man who is responsible for all of us being here tonight. As for Corbin, AJ is tired of him trying to short cut his way everywhere. The big bad wolf can huff and puff but he’ll never blow down the house that AJ Styles built.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Baron Corbin

Styles is defending but Corbin jumps him during the Big Match Intros. Tye Dillinger runs in to jump Corbin though and hurts his ankle. AJ is up for a running forearm and the Calf Crusher on the bad leg. No match of course and we’ll just wait on the announcement for the match being moved to the pay per view.

Post break, Corbin isn’t happy.

Here’s Charlotte for the first time in a good while. She’s been gone for about six weeks while her father has been healing up and he is making a comeback. Since she’s been gone, Charlotte has learned how fragile life is and from now on she’s going to make the most of every moment she can.

Cue Natalya to says he’s here to host the first ever Celebration of Women. There’s a covered up picture put up behind Natalya as she talks about how important women have been to the world. The picture is unveiled and of course it’s of Natalya herself. Charlotte likes the picture and says she’s coming for the title. This brings out Becky Lynch to say the title is coming back to its proper owner.

Now it’s Naomi to call Natalya a crazy cat lady and throw her glowing hat into the title hunt. Hang on a second though as it’s Tamina and Lana interrupting because this company has no idea how to book a women’s division aside from just throwing everyone into one match. Natalya leaves and says she’s not a crazy cat lady but here’s Daniel Bryan to make the multi-woman match to crown a new #1 contender for later tonight.

New Day vs. Hype Bros

Non-title with the Usos on commentary. Mojo grabs an abdominal stretch on Big E. but gets sent outside for a break less than a minute in because we can’t break ten minutes of wrestling on this show. Back with Kofi in trouble in the corner until Mojo misses a charge into the post. The hot tag brings in Big E., who misses the hip swivel Warrior Splash. Ryder adds the middle rope dropkick and the Broski Boot for two. Kofi hits the running dive over the top onto Mojo, leaving Ryder to take the Midnight Hour for the pin at 6:26. Not enough shown to rate but this was entertaining while it lasted.

We look at the Vince beatdown again.

Owens joins us live via satellite and apologizes (fans aren’t cool with that) for what happened last week. He apologizes to the WWE Universe and to the McMahon Family, but Shane had this coming. This is all on Shane, who drove Owens to do what he did last week. Last week, Owens was looking at Shane when he attacked Vince. He has one more apology and it’s to anyone who watches the pay per view. What he did to Vince is nothing compared to what’s going to do to Shane. It’s good that they’re going to Hell because people like Owens don’t go to Heaven.

Mojo says he’s tired of losing and something has to change.

Here’s Dolph Ziggler for his usual stuff: he’s the best in-ring performer ever and entrances don’t mean anything. First up it’s HHH, which means he can run NXT now, even if he’s not wearing mom jeans. Ziggler looks upset and says stop the show. That means Heartbreak Ziggler with Dolph saying he can feel himself losing his smile. The last one is the DX entrance, complete with the glow sticks. Ziggler’s two words for you: WHO CARES? He wants to know who is supposed to care about two dads trying to sell you stuff. Ziggler is the best ever and the fans couldn’t care less.

Naomi vs. Charlotte vs. Tamina vs. Becky Lynch

The winner gets Natalya at the pay per view. It’s a brawl to start and we’re on a break less than a minute in. Back with Charlotte and Becky breaking up a near fall before fighting each other. Becky kicks her in the ribs but Naomi crossbodies both of them for two on Lynch. Naomi grabs a Stunner for two on Charlotte as Natalya is watching in the back.

The reverse Rings of Saturn is broken up and it’s Becky grabbing the Disarm-Her. Tamina breaks that up as well but gets sent into the post. Becky’s bouncing kick in the corner is broken up and Charlotte spears Tamina down. She plants Naomi too and the moonsault hits both of them for a double near fall.

The Figure Four goes on but Becky dives in with a legdrop for the save. Tamina is back in with a Samoan drop on Becky and the Superfly Splash for two with Naomi making the save this time. Lana pulls Naomi outside but the distraction lets Charlotte kick Tamina in the face for the pin and the title shot at 9:57.

Rating: B-. This was good while it lasted and would have been better if we didn’t miss about a fourth of it for the sake of a commercial. Charlotte or Becky winning was fine here and they would have been a bit nuts to not go with Charlotte, especially with the book coming out and her dad’s health. It was a fast paced match though and that’s what this show needed.

Overall Rating: D+. This one ENTIRELY depends on how you care for your show. The big problem on this show is very simple: there was less than twenty five minutes of wrestling in two hours with about ten of that taking place during commercials. That’s terribly low, even by WWE standards. Based on that, it’s a horrible show.

However, this show was much more about hyping up the pay per view and I could get behind the idea of a show that gives away less action on the unimportant shows and saves it for the pay per views. On top of that I’m more interested in the pay per view than I was coming into this week, which is quite the step up. This show certainly isn’t for everyone but I liked the change of direction and you can see a lot more stuff added to the pay per view from here. It had a lot of negatives (low in-ring time, the Mahal stuff, Rusev/Orton) but the change of pace was very nice for a little switch.

Results

Randy Orton b. Aiden English – RKO

Rusev b. Randy Orton – Superkick

New Day b. Hype Bros – Midnight Hour to Ryder

Charlotte b. Naomi, Tamina and Becky Lynch – Big boot to Tamina

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: August 15, 2017
Location: Dunkin’ Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the last show before Summerslam and there’s a big main event to send us home. This week features Jinder Mahal vs. John Cena in a non-title match, which likely means that Baron Corbin and Shinsuke Nakamura will be lurking around. Other than that we’ll be pushing some of Sunday’s lower card matches as well. Let’s get to it.

A narrated video talks about tonight’s main event.

Phillips says this might be the biggest match in Smackdown’s history. This isn’t even Cena’s biggest match on Smackdown this month.

Here’s Mahal to talk about today being Independence Day in India. An Indian band performs a quick dance and then a woman sings the Indian national anthem. Mahal takes credit for the success of the WWE Network and goes on about how awesome India is until Nakamura interrupts. Nakamura says today is India’s Independence Day but it’s also Veterans Day in Japan. On Sunday, he’s taking the title. This was long and accomplished absolutely nothing.

The announcers send their best wishes to Ric Flair.

Natalya vs. Becky Lynch

Naomi comes out for commentary. Becky grabs a rollup for one but gets the taste slapped out of her mouth. That earns her a slap right back, sending Natalya to the floor as we take a break. Back with Becky caught in an abdominal stretch until she makes her comeback with the clotheslines. The Bexploder looks to set up the Disarm-Her but Becky has to escape the Sharpshooter. A top rope legdrop misses though and the Sharpshooter makes Becky tap at 7:33.

Rating: D+. Natalya continues to be the same performer she’s been for years now: completely competent in the ring but mostly lacking charisma or anything interesting. I still don’t know why she’s getting the shot when you have Becky and Charlotte on the sidelines. In theory they’re saving that for a bigger stage, but there’s not much of a bigger stage than Summerslam. Unless they’re just setting up the Money in the Bank cash-in and don’t want to waste a big match, I really don’t get the point in a glorified midcard match for the title.

Post match Naomi chases Natalya off from another Sharpshooter attack. Carmella comes out and teases cashing in her briefcase at Summerslam.

Tamina wants to know why Lana hasn’t made her ravishing yet. Lana says Tamina isn’t ready, which doesn’t sit well.

The Usos come in to see Daniel Bryan, who thinks they want him to join their rap group. It turns out they want to know which New Day members they’ll be facing Sunday. That would be Big E. and Xavier Woods, but the Usos want Woods and Kofi tonight. That’s cool with Bryan, who dances a bit as they leave.

Rusev vs. Chad Gable

Gable wastes no time in suplexing him to the floor but Rusev sends him into the steps a few times. Rusev tosses Gable over the announcers’ table and it’s a double countout at 1:16.

Post match Rusev puts Gable in the Accolade on the announcers’ table. Rusev grabs a mic and gets in the ring, only to have Orton come in from out of nowhere with an RKO. How did he not see a 6’4 wrestler running right in front of him?

Here’s AJ Styles to talk about Sunday’s match where Shane McMahon will be guest referee. AJ calls Shane to the ring and apologizes for accidentally kicking him last week. Shane says no apology is necessary but AJ is worried that Shane will use what happened last week to screw him over on Sunday. The boss says that won’t happen, but if AJ puts his hands on him on Sunday, Shane will put his hands on AJ as well.

AJ asks if that’s a threat but here’s Kevin Owens to interrupt. Owens loves those rules for Sunday because he thinks AJ has something planned. Kevin thinks AJ is going to try to get him to get into a fight with Shane on Sunday and cause a DQ. Shane tells them to shake hands but the fight breaks out with Shane having to block an errant AJ right hand. The ensuing argument lets Owens superkick Shane by mistake.

New Day vs. Usos

Non-title. Before the match, New Day said they’ll be seeing the Usos at Summerslam and goes over a list of places the Usos can see them before then. Kofi and Woods take turns hitting a long string of elbows, legdrops and splashes (over ten of them total) on Jey in the first minute. Double baseball slides drop the Usos and we take a break after a very fast start. Back with Kofi making his comeback and bringing Woods in off the hot tag to chop away. A double superkick to the legs set up a double superkick to the jaw but Jimmy makes the save. Jey superkicks Kofi’s knee and a double superkick his jaw for the pin at 7:49.

Rating: C-. That was a great opening but MY GOODNESS I’m sick of superkicks. This match didn’t even go eight minutes and there were seven superkicks included. Remember back in the day when one superkick finished a match? Well now it takes seven times that and most of them don’t even come close to finishing a match. Cool it with those already, as I assure you there are multiple other options out there.

It’s time for the final episode of Fashion Peaks with Fandango recapping everything that’s gone on so far, including the alien probes, which went very deep. They were MENTAL probes of course. Here’s Breeze in a dress and blond wig because that’s what he does these days. Breeze says they need to figure this out because the last thing they need is people thinking they’re making it up as they go along.

Fandango has a space rock that the aliens gave them, which he says can predict the future. He throws the rock and hits Ascension, who were returning pie. There’s a hair in the pie, along with a used Band-Aid and….GLUTEN! Viktor panics because they live a gluten free lifestyle and gets dragged away. There’s also a note in the pie, saying “Two B”. Fandango says he senses danger for the whole tag division. A graphic says they’ll return in two weeks.

Jinder Mahal vs. John Cena

Non-title and Jinder’s entrance is joined in progress. They fight over a test of strength to start until Cena shoves him away. One of the Singh Brothers gets in a cheap shot from the floor though and Mahal slowly takes over. Jinder throws him outside and we take a break. Back with Cena initiating his finishing sequence.

The Singh Brothers pull Mahal to the floor before the AA but the referee catches them for an ejection. That means the STF but Mahal is over to the ropes. Mahal snaps his throat across the top and hits a knee to the face for two. The Khallas is broken up and the AA….gets two? Well I’m a bit surprised. That means a super AA but here’s Corbin for the DQ at 9:59.

Rating: D. And so much for Mahal meaning much. He’s one of the worst choices for a champion you can find and now he can’t even get a full entrance in “one of the biggest matches in Smackdown history”. The fact that he didn’t get pinned helps a bit but he was completely destroyed at the end. Mahal needs to lose the title on Sunday, but it wouldn’t shock me if they kept it on him as a swerve.

Post match Corbin knocks Cena out and leaves….before realizing how stupid he would be to not cash in right now. Corbin cashes in the briefcase and IT’S ON!

Smackdown World Title: Baron Corbin vs. Jinder Mahal

Cena offers a quick distraction and Mahal grabs a rollup to retain at 9 seconds. THANK GOODNESS as that means there’s no cash-in on Sunday and we’re done with one of the stupid briefcases for the next eleven months.

Corbin is livid and Mahal celebrates with the Singh Brothers to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. That ending alone saved this show as I couldn’t be happier about the briefcase being gone. One of the dumbest things they could have done was have Nakamura win and then have Corbin cash-in to win the title. Now we don’t have to worry about that and Nakamura can Kinshasa Mahal back to the midcard where he belongs. Other than that, this was a show similar to last night as the bigger stories were in deep freeze (until the main event of course) and not much really happened. It’s not much of a show but hokey smokes that ending was a great call.

Results

Natalya b. Becky Lynch – Sharpshooter

Rusev vs. Chad Gable went to a double countout

Usos b. New Day – Double superkick to Kingston

John Cena b. Jinder Mahal via DQ when Baron Corbin interfered

Jinder Mahal b. Baron Corbin – Rollup

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: June 27, 2017
Location: Valley View Casino Center, San Diego, California
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s ladies night with two major women’s matches on the card. First up we have the second ever women’s Money in the Bank ladder match as the WWE tries to fix the mess they made out of the first one just nine days ago. After that we have Lana challenging Naomi for the Women’s Title in another Money in the Bank rematch. It’s almost like they’re just doing the same things twice for the sake of not having to come up with anything new. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at the Money in the Bank ladder match from the pay per view and the build to tonight with the theme of seizing opportunity when you get the chance. This is also used on the rest of the major stories going on around here.

Here’s Daniel Bryan to hype up the ladder match and explain the concept, only to be cut off by Carmella. She goes on the same rant she went on last week, explaining the rules of the Money in the Bank match and saying she didn’t break any rules. Carmella: “How can you break a rule if there are no rules???” Other people have interfered in ladder matches and those results weren’t changed. Bryan says he’s heard this before and we’re having the ladder match.

James Ellsworth tells the people to shut up and calls Bryan pathetic. He looks at Bryan and sees a coward who is staying out of the ring because of some fake injury. Daniel smiles and says he should just fire Ellsworth but instead just bans him from the entire arena for the rest of the night. Security comes out and drags him away as this opening segment wraps up after nearly fifteen minutes with really nothing new being done.

Hype Bros vs. Usos

Non-title but if the Hype Bros win, they get a future title shot. Zack and Jimmy start things off with an armdrag sending Uso down. It’s off to both partners with Mojo clotheslining Jey to the floor for a dive from Ryder. Jey gets in a superkick though and we take a break. Back with Ryder missing a charge in the corner and Jimmy adding the Superfly splash for the pin at 5:42. Not enough to rate due to the break but the commercial seemed completely worthless as there was less than ten seconds of action after the break.

Post match the New Day comes out to challenge for the titles at Battleground. The Usos accept, in rhyme no less. Kofi rhymes a bit of his own and tromboning ensues.

It’s Fashion Vice time with Ascension sitting in an interrogation room to be grilled by Breezango. Fandango holds up the stick figure drawing, which Konnor says isn’t them. Fandango: “You expect me to believe that? Because I do.” He offers two tickets to paradise (as in Eddie Money tickets) in exchange for information but that goes nowhere.

Breeze pulls out the water guns….and offers them iced tea and a cheese platter. Konnor says it wasn’t them and they were just at Money in the Bank to get a match. Noise is heard elsewhere and they leave to find their office trashed again. Fandango: “Sweet Richard Simmons.” There must be someone else so Breezango starts thinking. As they do, Ascension takes the concert tickets. That’s better as Ascension was the lamest reveal they could have done.

Women’s Title: Naomi vs. Lana

Lana is challenging and jumps Naomi during the Big Match Intros. The bell rings and Lana’s sitout spinebuster gets two. So much for that as a finisher. Naomi kicks her in the head and hits the split legged moonsault to retain at 41 seconds.

Becky Lynch is ready to have a fair chance to win Money in the Bank.

Here’s Aiden English to sing about how awesome he is. Cue Randy Orton to cut him off and we take a break. Back with Orton sitting in a chair, having RKO’d English during the commercial. We look back at Orton taking out the Singh Brothers last week (because we haven’t had enough filler on this show yet) before Orton says he wants another shot at Mahal’s title.

If he doesn’t get it, he’s going to beat Mahal up in the back. Then he’ll beat Mahal up in the parking lot. Then he’ll beat Mahal up in the airport. Then he’ll beat Mahal up at next week’s show too. At what point does Mahal file a restraining order? Here’s Shane McMahon to keep Orton from going Mahal hunting by saying we can’t have this. Orton is willing to be fired and go from city to city and spend all his money beating Mahal up.

Shane points out that the Singh Brothers did things that Orton has done before but he can sympathize with these feelings. The rematch is set for Battleground but there will be a stipulation chosen by Mahal. That’s cool with Orton but here’s Mahal to interrupt as well. Mahal says this is what’s wrong with everything around here when Orton isn’t worthy of a rematch. He mentions Great Khali being an inspiration (who he hated back in the day) and makes it a Punjabi Prison match. As luck would have it, there’s a video all primed up and ready to go as soon as he says it.

AJ Styles and Kevin Owens come in to see Bryan with Owens saying AJ couldn’t answer last week’s Open Challenge because he’s already been beaten. Styles makes an Anchorman reference which Owens doesn’t get (I don’t either as I only saw that movie once and didn’t care for it. I’ll wait here for you to gather your pitchforks.). Bryan has an idea: next week on the Fourth of July, we’ll have a battle royal with the winner facing Owens for the title at Battleground.

Here are Mike and Maria Kanellis for their Smackdown debut, only to have Sami Zayn cut them off in just a few seconds.

Sami Zayn vs. Baron Corbin

Sami goes right after him to start and sends Corbin to the floor, only to get tossed into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Corbin still in control and grabbing a bearhug. Sami slips out and hits that hard clothesline of his and avoids a charge, sending Corbin shoulder first into the post. Corbin misses another charge and gets rolled up for two before driving Sami right back into the same corner. A headbutt puts Corbin down but he catches a charging Sami with End of Days for the pin at 8:11.

Rating: C-. Just a quick win for Corbin here and that’s why Sami is around: he can lose several matches but the one or two wins he does get are enough to fuel him for a long time. Corbin needed this win to get him back on track for the sake of him being Mr. Money in the Bank, which should keep him going for a long time.

Shinsuke Nakamura says Corbin is scared of him and for good reason.

Charlotte vs. Tamina vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Natalya

Money in the Bank. Everyone brawls on the floor to start, leaving Carmella to make the very early climb. Naturally it’s very slow, allowing the other four to come in and stop her without too much effort. We’re quickly down to Becky vs. Charlotte with Lynch being left alone, only to have Tamina come back to send her into the ladder. A not great looking Superfly Splash crushes Becky and we take a break.

Back with Natalya suplexing Charlotte but getting suplexed on the floor by Becky. Charlotte and Tamina fight over the ladder until Natalya makes a save and loads it up over Charlotte in the corner. Natalya starts to climb but Charlotte shoves her ladder up to make a ramp for the save. Carmella shoves the ladder over, only to take a pumphandle suplex from Becky.

Back from another break with Natalya climbing slowly enough that Charlotte can make a save. Everyone but Carmella gets shoved down but the other four are right back to lift the ladder up and carry it away from the case. Carmella dives onto Becky and Natalya, leaving Charlotte to drop Tamina again. Charlotte puts the ladder over Tamina and climbs but Carmella is back to grab her legs.

Tamina pushes the ladder up from the mat for another save and superkicks the air in front of Charlotte’s face. A double powerbomb brings Carmella down but Natalya tries a Sharpshooter on Carmella. The announcers say it’s to take the legs out, though HITTING HER WITH A LADDER might make more sense.

Natalya goes after Charlotte and fights her into the crowd…..and here’s Ellsworth to climb the ladder. Becky shoves him over and crotches him on the top. Carmella makes another save and Becky hurts her leg on the landing. Carmella gives her a really bad chair shot to the back and climbs up for the briefcase at 24:29.

Rating: B-. General issues with ladder matches aside (the Sharpshooter, fighting into the crowd, slow climbing until the very end etc.), completely acceptable stuff for the most part. This was more long than good but they got the ending right, which was by far the most important thing they could have done here. Of course this begs the question of why they didn’t just do this in the first place but you have to take what you can get from WWE most of the time. At least Carmella won and looks strong as she goes after the title now, which is what matters most.

Overall Rating: C. The ladder match saves a lot of this but it was clear they were filling in as much time as they could. I have no idea what the point of the Women’s Title match was and the Hype Bros match was a bit of a waste of time as well. The ending worked though and that’s the most important part, especially when next week changes everything as Cena is back. Not a bad show, but it’s all about the main event and nothing more.

Results

Usos b. Hype Bros – Superfly Splash to Ryder

Naomi b. Lana – Split legged moonsault

Baron Corbin b. Sami Zayn – End of Days

Carmella won Money in the Bank

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Histories of Saturday Night’s Main Event and Clash of the Champions, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/05/19/history-of-saturday-nights-main-event-and-clash-of-the-champions-now-in-paperback-plus-price-drops/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: May 9, 2017
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re taped tonight from London as we have less than two weeks before Backlash. That means it’s Jinder Mahal time tonight and we get to see more of his rapid fire build towards being a main eventer. Other than that we might get more of the Welcoming Committee, which is turning into one of the worst heel stables I can remember in years. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of last month’s Six Pack Challenge where Mahal became #1 contender. Has Mojo Rawley had a match since then? Mahal then cost Randy Orton the House of Horrors match and stole the title belt.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Orton to get things going and he has the title back, thanks to Shane McMahon taking it from Jinder last week. Orton says he lost because of Mahal, not because of Wyatt or that refrigerator. Before Orton can get too far, here’s Mahal to show off his promotional pictures with the title. Mahal promises to begin a new age at Backlash before speaking I believe Punjab.

Cue Kevin Owens to say no one cares about anything but him. Owens brags about ending Chris Jericho’s career and, after he gets rid of AJ Styles, he wants the World Title. Now it’s AJ coming out to quite the reaction to say he’s the face that runs the place. Cue Baron Corbin but Sami Zayn jumps him from behind and the fights are on with the good guys cleaning house.

Becky Lynch vs. Natalya

Before the match, we get some generic “British people have bad teeth” jokes from James Ellsworth and Carmella. Naomi and Charlotte are here as Becky’s seconds. The Welcoming Committee offers an early distraction so Natalya can send Becky to the floor and take over. We hit the abdominal stretch for a bit before the STRAIGHT FIRE forearm has Natalya reeling. The Bexploder looks to set up something on the top but the other women get in a fight, allowing Natalya to pull Becky off the top for the pin at 3:02. That’s almost the same ending as Alexa Bliss vs. Mickie James from last night.

Rating: D+. The time and the familiar ending hut this one but real problem was taking fifteen minutes to introduce everyone and start the match. I’m sure this sets up a six woman tag for the pay per view, which should be a good place for either someone to turn heel or at least for the Welcoming Committee to get a win. Therefore, look for Charlotte to pin Carmella.

Lana is coming soon.

Charlotte blames Naomi for Becky’s loss but Lynch comes in to cool them down. A six woman tag is set for the pay per view.

It’s Fashion Files time! They’re at the 02 Arena this week and Fandango is dressed as Sherlock Holmes while Breeze is a standard British cop. Fandango: “Cheerio.” Breeze: “No thanks. I’ve already had my breakfast.” They find some spilled lead paint that would only be worn by Uggos. That must be a ruse so Breezango can’t tell them apart but it doesn’t really matter. The paint leads to a room where roaring is heard. They think something nefarious is going on in there but it’s just the Ascension warming themselves up. Breeze: “I’m getting too old for this s***e.” More funny stuff here as Breezango continues to look good.

Luke Harper vs. Erick Rowan

Rowan throws him to the floor to start as the announcers talk about how these two are running amuck with no one to guide them. Back in and Rowan scores with a spinning kick to the face and a splash for two. Harper suplexes his way out of the head vice but the discus lariat is blocked. Instead Erick gets two off a Side Effect and grabs the mask. The distraction (as the referee tries to figure out what the mask is supposed to look like) allows Rowan to poke Harper in the eye and grab a reverse spinning powerslam for the pin at 4:23.

Rating: D. Just a power match here but they really need to either stop pushing Harper for a few weeks and then having him lose over and over again. I mean, do they really think there’s value in Erick Rowan winning with a lame powerslam? This didn’t work and the booking makes my head hurt so we’ll move on.

Here’s Dolph Ziggler to call out Shinsuke Nakamura. He’s been here for eight years (How has it only been that long?) but the fans treat him like a disease. Who do the people cheer for now? That starts a Nakamura chant as this is starting to sound like Chris Jericho vs. AJ Styles last year.

Now people are calling Nakamura an artist but Ziggler is the strongest man in WWE because he never needed the people. This brings out Nakamura to tell Ziggler to shut up. Nakamura is ready to show him so here’s a referee but Ziggler says nope. Dolph says we do this on his time and wants the match at Backlash. The sneak attack earns Dolph a beating.

Sami is fired up to team with Orton and Styles. Zayn tries to run a strategy session but seems to just annoy his partners. By the time he announces their team as the winners, they’ve both left.

New Day is coming and we get a video game themed promo with every other team being listed on a character select screen.

Breezango vs. Ascension

Fandango chops at Konnor to start but it’s off to Viktor who runs him over. A chinlock doesn’t last long and it’s off to Breeze for some house cleaning. Fandango makes a blind tag and it’s an atomic drop into the Last Dance for the in at 2:39.

Post match the Usos come out to say twelve days over and over while listing off various things that Breezango can do to each others’ backs (with Jimmy clearly trying not to crack up).

Mojo Rawley is giving some kids a tour of the backstage area but stops to tell them a story about Andre the Giant. Andre did a lot of things but Mojo switches to a story about a boy who was different growing up. He was bullied as a kid but then he used it as motivation to become a legend. Mojo pulls out the trophy and the kids are amazed. I’ve started to like Mojo more and more lately and I’d love to see him get some more TV time.

Rusev hasn’t heard about his demand for a World Title shot but he’ll be here next week to get an answer.

Randy Orton/Sami Zayn/AJ Styles vs. Jinder Mahal/Baron Corbin/Kevin Owens

Sami and Corbin get things started but a quick tag brings in Owens. There’s no contact though as it’s off to Mahal for some kicks to the chest. Sami grabs a headscissors and brings in Orton so Mahal tags out to Owens. The threat of an RKO sends Owens out to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Corbin working over Sami and handing it off to Owens as the eternal feud continues. Sami is tossed outside for a stomping from Mahal, drawing AJ over to stare him down. Corbin’s chinlock keeps things slow so Jinder comes in for one of his own. The stomping keeps going and we take a break.

Back with AJ getting the hot tag to come in and clean house as everything breaks down. The running forearm drops a seated Corbin and Sami hits a big flip dive onto all three villains. Owens breaks up the Phenomenal Forearm though and Styles and Corbin are down. It’s Mahal breaking up the tag though and dropping a knee for two on Styles.

Owens comes back in for some very aggressive stomping and a chinlock of his own. That’s quite the popular move tonight and in no way a method to stretch out a long main event. The backsplash hits knees though and the hot tag brings in Orton. Everything breaks down and Owens eats the RKO, only to have Jinder’s cobra clutch slam put Orton away at 22:14.

Rating: C+. The match was more long than good and the ending extended the Mahal vs. Orton feud but this felt like a way to fill in TV time instead of a match that needed to go this long. I’m not sure how much people are going to buy Mahal’s cobra clutch slam as a threat to beat Orton but at least they’re setting it up as a possibility.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a rough one as it felt like a shortened version of Raw. The problem is I don’t watch Smackdown for a shortened version of Raw but rather something far more interesting and exciting. To be fair though, I think we can blame that on the UK tour as those shows are almost always lifeless. Some stuff was set up for the pay per view though and that’s important with just a show left beforehand.

Results

Natalya b. Becky Lynch – Natalya pulled her off the top rope

Erick Rowan b. Luke Harper – Spinning reverse powerslam

Breezango b. Ascension – Last Dance to Viktor

Jinder Mahal/Kevin Owens/Baron Corbin b. Sami Zayn/Randy Orton/AJ Styles – Cobra clutch slam to Orton

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the NXT: The Full Sail Years Volumes I and II, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/03/24/kbs-history-of-nxt-volumes-1-and-2-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6