Best of the WWF Volume 3
Host: Vince McMahons
Commentators: Jesse Ventura, Gorilla Monsoon, Gene Okerlund

This it the final volume in this series and I couldn’t be happier. This is from 1985 and also has some TNT skits in it which are usually pretty funny. We’re in 1985 here and at least one of the matches I’ve done before. I just want to get this done already so I’ll stop talking now. Let’s get to it.

For the last time in this series, that Coliseum Video intro rocks.

Vince is very clearly reading off a teleprompter. He runs down the whole card and we’re finally ready go to.

Jimmy Snuka vs. Roddy Piper

This is a strap match and you win by pin/submission. This gives us the ultra rare yet awesome Jesse Ventura solo commentary. From what I can find this is in St. Louis. Snuka hits him in the leg to start as they jockey for position with the strap. Piper scratches the eyes and comes at him with the strap to the throat. Snuka comes back and whips at Piper who tries to run.

Snuka chokes away at him which is kind of a heelish move. Then again Snuka used to be a heel so it works fine. Piper comes back and whips Jimmy but tries a headbutt. DOES NO ONE LEARN THEIR STEREOTYPES ANYMORE??? He rams Snuka’s head into the buckle and even Jesse is saying that was stupid. Back in and Piper overreacts to getting punched but he’s hilarious at it. In something you’ll hardly ever see again, Piper gets caught in a top rope cross body for the perfectly clean pin.

Rating: C+. This was an incredibly entertaining feud and while short, this was definitely a fun match. They did their usual over the top stuff and we got a bunch of fun things out of it. I think this was a dark match at a Superstars taping so it’s not like it was a featured match or anything.

Piper goes crazy post match and destroys Snuka with the strap post match.

Bob Orton vs. Ricky Steamboat

This looks like Toronto. Steamboat goes after the bad arm which is a very slow healing injury. Orton tries to kip up but can’t quite escape the arm hold. Steamboat slams him and we’re right back to the arm. Orton comes back with a beal and flying headscissors but misses a charge which sends him to the floor. Out there he throws a drink in Steamboat’s face but that’s not a DQ.

Orton takes over and hooks a cravate. Off to a chinlock which is quickly broken but Steamboat can’t slam him. Orton hooks the chinlock on again and rubs the cast in his face. I love little things like that. Steamboat comes back with chops and heads to the top. The top rope cross body only gets two, probably putting Orton in a very elite club.

Steamboat gets thrown to the apron but he skins the cat and comes back with a shot to send Orton to the floor. He was always great at that bump. The Cowboy tries to suplex Ricky to the floor but Steamboat counters. They speed it up again and Ricky misses a splash. Orton loads up the cast and comes off the top with a shot to the head and that draws the DQ.

Rating: B. Two guys that are absolutely great getting a good deal of time in front of a hot crowd. What are you expecting but a solid match? Orton was great as a guy that could be thrown in there and be asked to give you a solid match. He’s kind of the Kofi of his day but as a mat guy instead of a high flier. You never get a bad match out of him and he’s always entertaining. Very fun match.

Orton goes after him post match but Steamboat runs him off.

British Bulldogs vs. Johnny Rodz/Rene Goulet

The Bulldogs are new now so this is your basic squash/extended match that should be a squash. This is in MSG and Vince takes forever to intro the match. The old guys are clearly in over their heads here but Goulet gets in some token offense and brings in Rodz. The Bulldogs are like boys please and hit a pair of missile dropkicks and Dynamite nips up to snap suplex Rodz.

The heels take over with Dynamite getting beaten down. Rodz is very boring looking but he trained about half of ECW so take that for what it’s worth. Davey comes in with the delayed vertical and we need to get to the interesting part in a hurry. Everything breaks down and Davey throws Goulet in a fireman’s carry. Dynamite hops from the top rope, jumps onto Goulet’s back and hits the Swan Dive for the pin.

Rating: C+. Totally awesome stuff here for the Bulldogs as this is probably close to their debut. To give you an idea of how awesome they looked here, the MSG crowd gave them a standing ovation after the match. Upon further review this was their debut, at least in MSG. Great debut match and it worked well.

British Bulldogs vs. Hart Foundation

That was their first match in MSG, and this is their second. Joined in progress with Dynamite and Bret getting us going. The Brits clean house until the power guys come in for a test of strength. Bret comes back in and the Harts take over with some nice double teaming stuff. Bret misses a charge and knees Anvil by mistake to bring in Dynamite.

House is cleaned and everything speeds up. There’s a falling headbutt to Bret as things finally get down to one on one. Missile dropkick puts Bret down and there’s the powerslam but Jim breaks up the cover. That allows Bret to take over and the Harts dominate. Dynamite hooks a sunset flip but the curfew comes on. That means it’s I think 10pm in New York and therefore the show has to end. Imagine that happening today.

Rating: C+. Good stuff here but there’s only so much they can do with so little time. These teams just couldn’t have a bad match in this time period if their lives depended on it. Dynamite was so great with his speed stuff and it’s easy to see how Benoit modeled himself after the Kid. Fun match, would have been great with a finish.

We go to a famous skit from Tuesday Night Titans. Albano is in an office and we’re going to see George Steele get shock therapy in an attempt to get him to speak. First up the doctor tries to hypnotize him. George talks about playing football in school when he was 13 and messing up his tongue. He didn’t talk in school or something and then he became a wrestler and was booed because he wrestled Bruno. The hypnosis ends and George goes off again.

Now let’s try electrical shock. Apparently this is going to make George smart and not crazy. The doctor is named Sigmund Ziff. Good to know. After some more hypnosis George has his hat put on. George gets some shock and manages to say “how now brown cow” in a British accent. Then he gets shocked again and he’s back to normal. Funny segment but it didn’t need to go 8 minutes.

US Express/George Steele vs. Adrian Adonis/Big John Studd/Bobby Heenan

This is from MSG and this show is a bit more famous because of the debut of Randy Savage on it. No one wants to start with the Animal. Barry and Adonis (not yet gay or in pink) start us off. Let the stalling begin! Before anything happens, Heenan is brought in so Windham tags Steele. Heenan DIVES to the floor to hide and it’s back to Adonis. Now it’s back to Windham before any contact has been made at all.

Off to Studd to meet Windham and Barry is knocked down pretty easily. It isn’t often that Barry has to speed things up but he does it here as he doesn’t have another option. He keeps going for the slam which doesn’t work at all. A cross body gets two. Clipped to Heenan being brought in and Barry beats him down like a world champion beating on a manager.

Everything breaks down and Steele rams all three heels into the posts. Rotundo comes in and Heenan’s mouth is bleeding. Mike takes Studd down and works on the arm. Clipped to Adonis beating on Rotundo. Gorilla gives us some analysis of what we’re seeing and the fans chant USA. Windham finally comes in as does Steele, wanting to get his hands on Bobby. There wasn’t a tag and everything breaks down. Steele goes outside and comes back with a chair which he hits the referee with for the DQ.

Rating: D. Pretty boring match here and I really don’t get the point of them giving us what appears to be a focus on Steele and then having him lose his match. Then again I think they did that more than once in this series so it must be a running theme. That doesn’t mean it makes sense but it’s what they’re doing I guess.

Here’s a video from Ivan Koloff vs. Bruno Sammartino in a cage.

David Sammartino vs. Brutus Beefcake

This is from Wrestlemania I so I’ll just copy and paste here. The version on the tape is clipped (thank goodness) but this is the full PPV version. We get a quick promo from the Sammartinos where Bruno tells Beefcake’s manager Johnny V to stay out of it. V says he’s not worried about Bruno. Now we go on to what was little more than a reason to have the managers brawl at ringside, we have David Sammartino against Brutus Beefcake.

David is accompanied by his father and Johnny Valiant for Beefcake. Big stall to start which is filled in by Gorilla talking about how great the crowd is, and for the time it really was. Finally we get going and Jesse cracks me up by saying that a loss for either man here could set their careers back 2 years.

That’s nothing but priceless. Anyway, we have a nice little wrestling sequence to start with Beefcake stalling again after sliding to the floor. We’re almost 5 minutes in and nothing at all of interest has happened yet. They’re trying to do a technical match and it’s just failure. I’m quite bored as I watch this match and it’s not getting any better.

I feel like I’m watching a house show match, but not the good kind. I feel like I’m watching a house show match that makes jobbers look good. Even the commentators sound bored here, yet for some reason the crowd is into this. FINALLY we get the managers involved and it’s a huge brawl for the double DQ.

Rating: D-. I was so bored I almost fell asleep. Absolutely nothing at all of note and it was just done to get Bruno on the show. David had a lot to live up to and for the most part he never came close which is the case for the vast majority of the kids of major stars. If nothing else look at David Flair. This was a very bad match though as Beefcake was the top guy in the ring which sums up things rather well.

Bruno Sammartino/David Sammartino vs. Johnny V/Brutus Beefcake

Pretty obvious reasoning behind this one. David is just so horrible compared to his father that having them tag was probably not a great idea. Arnold Skaaland is with the family here. Bruno vs. Johnny starts us off and Bruno throws him out easily. Brutus comes in and is tossed as well. Since this is MSG, Bruno can get a big pop by doing anything beyond breathing. Back in and Bruno does as much as he did before to keep Johnny in trouble.

Off to David who just is not that good. He works an armbar and slams Johnny a few times before Brutus comes in. Bruno comes back in to hook on the armbar and then tags out so David can do the exact same thing. The heels get in a tiny bit of offense before Bruno comes back in. This is so boring other than when Bruno is in there. David comes in again and gets hammered on for awhile. Valentine misses a charge but manages to avoid contact with the buckle. Not that it matters as David rolls him up for the pin anyway.

Rating: D. Bruno, I love you man but your kid sucks in the ring. I mean he’s just BAD. This whole thing was to have David be put over and Bruno was trying his best to try to give him a rub but at the end of the day, David just didn’t have any talent whatsoever. He’s just bad and thankfully he wasn’t around that long at all.

Here’s a clip from King Kong Bundy on Tuesday Night Titans where he tries on wigs. Well he does look like an egg without them. This goes on for awhile.

King Kong Bundy vs. Tony Garea

Bundy shoves him around with ease as today this would be Brodus vs. Regal and would last a minute. Here in 1985 though, this lasts WAY too long. Garea works on the leg but gets caught by the power. Garea misses a dropkick and the Avalanche ends this. Somehow that took about 6 minutes.

Rating: D-. What in the world was the point of this? Either way at least this tape is almost over. Bundy was fine as a monster but he could only be interesting for so long. That would be about 2 months but he was good for something like this. Boring match here and I’d much rather watch Garea have a tag match.

Battle Royal

Masked Superstar, Moondog Rex, Samu, Mil Mascaras, David Schultz, Bob Boyer, Mr. Fuji, Ivan Putski, Big John Studd, Tony Atlas, Paul Orndorff, Rocky Johnson, Adrian Adonis, Jimmy Snuka, Dick Murdoch, Hulk Hogan, Andre the Giant, Tiger Chung Lee

We’re in Missouri here and actually this is the battle royal that Hogan was talking about on a show I reviewed a few weeks ago. Cool stuff. Anyway the winner gets thirty grand and Schultz is gone almost immediately. Hogan has been world champion about two weeks here. Studd keeps going to the apron but not out. Hogan throws out a few people. I don’t know if he’s even acknowledged as champion yet.

EVERYONE goes after Andre and Boyer gets trampled in it. They have to carry him out which can’t be good for your health. Studd is on the floor but not eliminated. Adonis hammers on Hogan so he Hulks Up and punches him to the floor in an elimination. I have no idea who is left. Putski beats on Atlas and Masked Superstar is out as is Orndorff. Orndorff pulls Johnson to the floor through the ropes and posts him.

Rocky is busted open and Studd is finally back in. Johnson collapses and Samu dives out by mistake. And never mind as Johnson and Murdoch go out seconds later. Mascaras and someone go out. Hogan and Andre go at it. Studd throws out Putski, then Andre while he’s at the ropes. Hogan goes out as well and Studd wins it.

Rating: D-. Really boring match here but Hogan vs. Andre is always worth seeing. It’s pretty cool to see them do that this early but other than that, there’s nothing going on here at all. This was a different era though and you can really see that. Boring match and a bad way to end the series.

Hogan demands Studd get back in so Hogan and Andre both beat him up.

Overall Rating: D. It has two good matches and then about an hour and fifteen minutes of drek. This was a dark era for the company as they had no one ready to fight Hogan yet other than Piper and that had already been done. Nothing to see here other than stuff from guys that were naturally great talents. Why is that not a surprise? And with that, we’re done with the Best of the WWF, which is a bad name for the series as it’s a lie.

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Best of the WWF Volume 9
Hosts: Johnny Valiant, Gorilla Monsoon
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan, Alfred Hayes, Billy Red Lyons

We have two to go in this series and I have some time to kill today so this ends now. This one is from late 86 so it’s hard to say what to expect on here. There seems to be fewer match on this tape though so maybe they’ll be longer? It’s hard to tell on these as they’re such a mixed bag. Let’s get to it.

Coliseum Video intro gets my toes tapping.

The hosts run down the card and Valiant kind of goes insane about the boot camp match.

Intercontinental Title: Ricky Steamboat vs. Randy Savage

From Toronto and I’d bet this is the best match on the tape. I think we’re joined very early in this with Steamboat working on the arm. Savage is defending of course. Steamboat cranks on the arm and speeds things up to confuse Savage. Gorilla and Heenan get in an argument over Heenan not being able to talk. Gorilla: “Go ahead, the floor is your’s.” Heenan: “I don’t want the floor, I want the microphone.” Gorilla: “Go ahead.” Heenan: “I don’t care to say anything right now.” I love these two.

Steamboat stays on the arm as is his custom. Savage gets the rope but the referee kicks his arm off like he’s cheating. What a jerk! More arm work by Steamboat so Savage takes him to the ropes for the break. It works because Steamboat is in there and the referee yells at Savage. What’s up with this guy? Heenan recommends choking Streamboat because he’s just a mean guy.

Savage manages to send him into the corner and Steamboat falls to the floor. Back in and an elbow puts Ricky down and the top rope ax handle gets two. He tries another but Steamboat gets in a punch to the ribs. They head to the floor for a brief slugout where Ricky takes over. Back inside Steamboat hits a top rope chop for two and a double chop puts Randy down for the same result.

Savage shoves Steambaot into the referee and everyone is down. Heenan thinks it was just an accident of course and then blames it on Steamboat. They fight over a backslide and the referee is back up. This referee counts slow and it’s two here. Savage is busted open but manages to pull out a foreign object. It hits Steamboat in the eyes but doesn’t knock him down. Savage falls to the floor and eventually pulls Steamboat out too. They brawl for awhile and Steamboat beats the count in by about half a second.

Rating: B. Hey what a shock: two masters have a great match. They just did their thing and it was an excellent match. It’s not exactly Detroit in 87, but then again what is? This was a much slower paced match but it’s still very good in its own right. Good stuff here as always and this isn’t going to be topped on this show. If it does I’ll be stunned.

Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff vs. Hart Foundation

In Boston here and this would be heel vs. heel. The Harts are the faces by default and get cheered as a result. They also break up the Russian national anthem to really ensure their cheers. Even Gorilla acknowledges that no one cheers the Harts most of the time. The Harts clear the ring and eventually we start with Bret vs. Nikolai. Off to Sheik before anything happenes.

Bret sends him to the floor pretty easily as the Harts are in desperate need of a better team than this to face. Sheik gets him in the heel (I guess) corner but he misses a boot so Volkoff gets knocked down. Nikolai does get up to break up the middle rope elbow and Neidhart is shoved away. Sheik can take over now and brings in Nikolai who gets caught in a sunset flip which the referee misses.

The team that should have been called the Iron Curtain uses the classic basic heel moves to control as Sheik runs through his array of offense: abdominal stretch, gutwrench suplex and camel clutch, the final of which is broken up by Jim. Bret blocks some suplexes and it’s off to Neidhart. Jim cleans house with a bunch of dropkicks but Sheik breaks up a cover. Everything breaks down and Sheik pulls Neidhart’s leg to break up a slam and Volkoff falls on top for the pin.

Rating: D. Bad match and it’s not the right pairing for the Harts at all. They’re much better against the speed teams and since there was at least one for them to fight in the Killer Bees, I’m assuming there’s something up here. Not much of a match and pretty short, but the Harts did what they could. It just didn’t work all that well.

Nikolai Volkoff vs. Corporal Kirschner

This is a boot camp match which basically means street fight. The idea here is American hero vs. evil foreigner, which makes so much sense as we’re in CANADA. Volkoff runs a lot which doesn’t work as Kischner drops him with some shots. A low blow stops the Corporal and Volkoff takes over. Other than the low blow which might not have been seen anyway, the gimmick has only meant Nikolai is in camouflage pants.

Out to the ramp and Nikolai slams him out there a few times. And now back in because going into a big brawl might be too interesting. Back to the floor and this is going absolutely nowhere. Volkoff somehow manages to hit a pair of chair shots so bad that it actually makes the match EVEN MORE boring. He hammers on the Corporal with a belt and clotheslines him down with it.

Sunset flip gets two for Corporal and he starts his comeback. The fans wake up quickly but Kirschner makes sure to wait awhile between each move. Volkoff is losing his pants. And never mind as Kirschner is sent to the floor again. While he’s out there the Corporal takes off his boot. A shot with that is enough to finally end this nonsense.

Rating: F. I forgot this was a gimmick match most of the time. First off, Volkoff is so slow that it couldn’t get going no matter what was going on. Couple that with those HORRIBLE chair shots (I mean they didn’t even make noise) and there was no way for this to be anything resembling good at all.

Junkyard Dog/Andre the Giant/Jimmy Snuka vs. John Studd/Ken Patera/Jesse Ventura

This is two weeks before Wrestlemania and in MSG. Isn’t that pushing things pretty close together? Dog vs. Patera gets us going and the fans are already into it. Andre is in quickly and the dominance begins. Patera is knocked all over the place and Heenan tries to calm him down. Off to JYD again and Patera can barely stand up. Andre runs Patera off again and it all breaks down pretty quickly.

The heels take over and it’s off to Jesse who uses his usual stuff. In kind of a surprise, Jesse tries to ram Dog’s head into the buckle and it works as well as it always does. Here comes Snuka and the fans go crazy. Jesse gets in a shot though and the heels take over. Studd comes in and Andre wants a piece of him but has to wait a few weeks. Off to a bearhug to Snuka and the heels use the old switcheroo to bring back Patera.

Jesse comes in and we complete the trio of bearhugs. Back to Studd who bearhugs him as well. The place is going to erupt when Andre comes in. Jimmy breaks the hold and tags Andre. I was right about the place erupting. It’s a battle of the giants but Patera breaks up the slam. Studd runs and it’s off to Jesse. Everything breaks down and Snuka splashes Jesse for the pin while Andre runs interference.

Rating: D. Very boring match for the most part but the MSG reactions for Andre and Snuka were just great. Those two could do no wrong back then, which is probably what made the heel turn for Andre work so well. Boring match but a good ending which helped it a little bit. The Superfly Splash is always worth seeing.

King Kong Bundy/Big John Studd vs. Sivi Afi/King Tonga

Tonga is Meng/Haku and is in the middle of a small push as he tries to slam Studd. He succeeded at a house show but it was after a match was over. Tonga and Studd start with the power stuff. Tonga throws him to the floor and rams him into the post to take over. Back in Studd jumps off the top for a forearm shot and Tonga is in trouble.

As I say that he comes back with a superkick and Studd is reeling. Tonga fires away and dances. A headbutt keeps Studd down and there’s a slam which should be $15,000 but Heenan would always have an excuse of some sort. Afi comes in and gets tossed around but isn’t really hurt. Bundy comes in and the size and power catch up with the islanders. Afi takes him down and splashes him for two.

Afi looks a lot like Jimmy Snuka. He doesn’t have anywhere near the talent but that never stopped people before. Studd and Bundy pound him down and this is going on forever. Tonga comes in and Bundy drops a knee on him which gets the pin. Bundy tried to pull up but it got counted anyway. At least it’s over.

Rating: D-. This tape is AWFUL. This was basically a squash and probably the end of the run for King Tonga. Afi never went anywhere and I have no idea what happened to him. Bundy and Studd would continue to beat on people including the feud with the Machines which is an old favorite of mine. Other than that there isn’t much going on at all with them and they’d leave pretty soon.

Cowboy Lang vs. Lord Littlebrook

And it’s a midget match. This is in MSG and I have no idea what to talk about here. There aren’t any stories to them and there aren’t really any characters so what’s the point in these? Lang tries a few full nelsons and the crowd doesn’t care. Littlebrook bites the fingers so Lang bites him and the referee. This is a “comedy” match which as usual in these matches, as is the lack of comedy. Lang wins a reverse rolling victory roll. I’m not rating it of course but this was just as bad as any midget match.

Battle Royal

Thankfully they give us an entrants list: Junkyard Dog, Harley Race, Billy Jack Haynes, King Kong Bundy, Sivi Afi, Brutus Beefcake, Bobby Heenan, Pedro Morales, Lanny Poffo, Mike Sharpe, Moondog Spot, Jimmy Hart, King Tonga, Big John Studd, Dynamite Kid, Davey Boy Smith, Greg Valentine, Johnny Valiant, SD Jones, Tony Garea, Moondog Rex, Tony Atlas. The British Bulldogs were listed twice for some reason. The winner gets 50 grand.

Everyone immediately puts Studd and Bundy out as Jimmy Hart dives to the floor. Heenan gets tossed out quickly and things slow down as you would expect them to do. Jimmy is under the ring. SD Jones goes out and this is a pretty slow battle royal which is ok. Mike Sharpe goes out as does Atlas. Valiant is tossed. There’s nothing else to talk about in this.

There goes Garea. Race looks different here with the brown hair. I know that’s his more famous look but it’s different here. Speaking of Race, he’s out as is Afi. That puts him down to about ten people. The Bulldogs hit stereo dropkicks to take Moondogs at the same time. There are nine left. Dynamite Kid is gone and everyone is on the same side of the ring. I believe there are 8 left.

Pedro gets caught on the top and Valentine hits him enough to get rid of him. Beefcake is thrown out and we’re down to Poffo, Haynes, Smith, Dog, Tonga and Valentine, or five good guys vs. Valentine. He manages to dump Haynes and Tonga in a few seconds. Smith charges but Valentine low bridges him, then does the same thing to Poffo.

We’re down to Dog and Valentine in the ring. Dog is thrown to the outside but it’s through the middle ropes. That goes nowhere until Dog manages to headscissor Valentine out but he falls out too. And then Jimmy Hart comes in and is declared the winner because he went under the ropes earlier. The fans LOUDLY boo this out of the building but it’s totally legal.

Rating: D+. Not much here but they gave us a good ending. You know that the fans in MSG are going to freak out in the end for something like that. Good fun match here and definitely the best match on the tape other than the opener which are the only two good matches here.

Overall Rating: F+. Other than the opener and a one joke match, this was HORRIBLE. 1986 was a very bad time for the WWF and since there’s some weird No Hogan Rule on a lot of these tapes, there isn’t anything really interesting going on most of the time. This was like the bottom of the barrel for the company, which doesn’t scream Best to me.

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Best of the WWF Volume 8
Host: Gene Okerlund
Commentators: Alfred Hayes, Gorilla Monsoon

This is one of the last ones I have left so for any of you getting annoyed with me doing these over and over again, counting these two I have four to go so it’s almost over. This one is from mid 86 so we’re in a far different era than the last one of these that we took a look at. Let’s get to it.

Same opening video, same comments from me about it.

Hart Foundation vs. Killer Bees

This is from MSG. I remember one of these four (I think Bret) saying these teams wrestled a few thousand times so they know how to work well together. Bret is brand new (to WWF) here. Anvil and Brunzell get us going. Brunzell tries to get in a power contest with him for some reason and it goes as well as you would expect. Jim tries to ram into him and it hurts him more than Neidhart.

Crowd is white hot here and the fans go nuts for a drop toehold. Brunzell works on the leg which is the best thing he could do. Anvil goes after him with the power game and here’s Bret for the first time. The referee has a small afro here. Bret is a little more muscular here than I’m used to seeing him as. Off to a chinlock and Blair is in control. The crowd is amazing here as they get into the tiniest of things like Blair getting up from a chinlock.

There’s the tag to Brunzell but he goes after the wrong guy. Bret knees him in the back and it’s Brunzell in trouble again. Back to the chinlock by Anvil this time. A quick DEVASTATING bearhug leads to Bret coming in but Blair saves a pin. Again the crowd here amazes me. Bret hooks a front facelock and he keeps the tag from being made again. Brunzell gets free but Anvil gets Blair’s attention on the floor.

Time for some back work as Brunzell is in trouble. I thought it was usually Blair that took the beating for the most part. Hart hits a dropkick for a very delayed two. This is your standard old school tag formula which means that the main criteria is how talented the guys are in at selling the stuff they’re doing. These four are great, so that should mean a good match.

There’s your tag to Blair who clears house. Small package gets two. Heel miscommunication would seem to be the ending but Bret kicks out. There’s an abdominal stretch to Bret and everything breaks down again. The Bret corner chest bump gets two. O’Connor Roll gets a VERY close two. A blind tag brings Brunzell back in and he kicks Bret’s head off with a dropkick but the time runs out at probably 20:00.

Rating: B-. These t

wo having a good match in the mid 80s is like saying the sun came up this morning. These guys were practically memorizing each other at this point and like I said, they wrestled each other a few hundred times at least. This was no shock and would have been great with a clean finish or a finish that gave us a winner. Still though, that’s a reason to come back for more.

Terry Gibbs vs. Dan Spivey

Gibbs is a name you hear popping up every now and then. Spivey was brought in for the simple reason of he looked exactly like Barry Windham who had flipped out and went home. Seriously, that’s why Spivey has a job. This is joined in progress with Spivey being knocked out to the floor. The next few matches are about newcomers and in this case it’s Spivey. Elbow drop gets two for Terry. Time for a bearhug which goes on WAY too long.

Spivey comes back but misses an elbow. Gibbs takes over again but jumps into a bearhug of his own. Gibbs thinks of the smart idea of raking the eyes. Spivey comes back again and this time the elbow hits. A legdrop gets the same. Did I mention he has blonde hair and yellow tights? Bulldog ends this for Bar…I mean Spivey.

Rating: D. What we saw of this was bad. Gibbs is nothing of note and Spivey is there because he was tall and blonde and I guess they were hoping no one would notice the difference. Bad match here, mainly because neither guy is worth anything in the ring, which is what it all breaks down to.

Billy Jack Haynes vs. Moondog Rex

Haynes is the newcomer here and we’re in Boston. A pretty loud boring chant begins while Rex is on offense. Haynes starts his comeback and the fans really aren’t all that interested. Rex is busted a bit as he comes back in and hammers away. Full nelson by Haynes ends this quick. Not enough to rate but it was nothing to see at all.

Junkyard Dog vs. King Kong Bundy

Back to MSG. This isn’t about newcomers in case you were confused. Hayes thinks Bundy will be the man that takes the title off Hogan. I’ll have what he’s having please. This is going to be a lot of kicking and punching I think. Bundy knocks him down but the missed elbow lets JYD use the all fours headbutts. Dog comes back with clubbing shots but Bundy takes him down with a clothesline.

Knee drop gets two for the white dude. Dog punches away as that’s about all he knows how to do. A bunch of those get two. A falling headbutt misses but that shouldn’t hurt him should it? They slug it out and a double clothesline puts both guys down. Things slow down and it’s a chinlock by Bundy. The referee checks Dog’s arm and even though it drops three times, they check it again and the fourth time it stays up so that’s good enough I guess. Dog makes his comeback but Bobby trips him and that’s a DQ.

Rating: D-. And yet I didn’t hate it. The problem with this was that it was all punching and kicking. I mean that was probably 95% of the match. The fans kind of reacted to it but then again people watch Jersey Shore so there you go. Nothing to see here but what were you really expecting here?

Jimmy Jack Funk vs. Tony Garea

Funk is the newcomer here. Joined in progress again with Funk holding a chinlock. Off to a chinlock…again. Jimmy has Jimmy in the corner. Garea counters a suplex and Hart desperately tries to convince Gorilla that his man will win. They slug it out from their knees and here’s Tony’s comeback. Tony tries a cross body but Jack catches it and after about 4 hours, turns it over into a powerslam for the pin.

Rating: D-. Funk is another guy that I never got the appeal of. I think they tried to put him into the Funk family to try to give him credibility but it didn’t work at all. Garea was a good hand to have but his time had passed for the most part. Basically imagine a face version of William Regal.

Harley Race vs. Lanny Poffo

Race is the “newcomer” here, although they openly say he’s wrestled for twenty years. Clipped to Poffo taking something like a brainbuster on the floor. The fans are quiet but this is the old Race, as in the old school style of him. Top rope headbutt (which Race is credited with inventing) puts Poffo down and a regular one puts him on the floor. Poffo starts his comeback and hits a flying headscissors to bring Race over the top and back in. Race gets him in a fireman’s carry and drops him throat first across the top rope to break up the comeback though. Fisherman’s suplex ends this. Not enough to grade but Race was his usual great self, even though the match was dull.

Time for a bodyslam challenge. Studd offered a $15,000 reward to anyone who could slam him. Oh wait it’s a match with that as a stipulation. Got it.

Big John Studd vs. Ricky Hunter/Jim Powers

I just can’t escape this Powers guy. Before the match starts though King Tonga (Meng/Haku) comes out and says he can slam him. Studd says wait your turn. Both guys try to slam him which doesn’t work at all. Bruno is on commentary and he’s about one step shy of saying “dudes, fail.” They finally figure out that you have to beat on him and then slam him when he’s stunned. The idea is fine but it doesn’t work at all. Studd destroys them and pins Hunter with a slam.

King Tonga runs in and slams him with ease. You know what that means.

Big John Studd vs. King Tonga

Studd immediately slams him during the opening bell to take over. Tonga goes for a slam but it gets countered. That’s the whole point of the match: Tonga wants to slam Studd. Off to a chinlock but Tonga comes back with some martial arts. Another slam attempt sends them tumbling to the floor and it’s a double countout. No rating again but this was a one move match.

They brawl on the floor post match with Tonga getting the better of it. The brawl and teasing going back in goes on longer than the match. Now they get back in and brawl as there’s a referee in there for some reason. Tonga headbutts him to the floor and that’s enough for John.

Ted Arcidi vs. Terry Gibbs

Arcidi is a strongman and the newcomer here. Yeah they’re still on that. Arcidi overpowers him and there’s an oil complaint. He no sells everything to start and gets a full nelson but Gibbs makes the ropes. After some quick offense (as in punching/pounding, which Gorilla calls unconventional), Ted gets a quick bearhug to end it. Just a squash.

Cousin Junior vs. Hercules Hernandez

Herc is the newcomer and Junior is a hillbilly. Joined in progress again and Herc (with wild hair) is holding a chinlock. There’s no commentary for this so far for some reason. Oh ok there is but it’s very quiet. Herc works him over and gets two off an elbow. Back to the chinlock. Junior makes his comeback but gets slingshotted (slungshot?) to the floor. Herc punches him back down and Junior isn’t wearing any shoes. Junior comes back with a sunset flip but Hernandez counters that as well.

After more punches, there’s another chinlock. Junior makes his comeback but gets caught by a kind of superkick and a jumping knee. Herc isn’t exactly Lou Thesz out there but he slams Junior to expand the repertoire. He goes up but a jumping punch misses. Herc reverses a sloppy O’Connor Roll for the pin and I think he had some tights. Well, overalls.

Rating: F. These newcomers have a lot to learn. Junior was part of the Hillbilly Family which was around to give Hillbilly Jim something to keep him on screen while he recovered from a broken leg. I think they were around before that too but not in as prominent of a role. This was really bad.

Intercontinental Title: Pedro Morales vs. Adrian Adonis

Since Adrian never held this title, Pedro is defending. Joined in progress (again) as this is an Archives match. They slug it out and the fans are of course way into Pedro. He knocks Adonis to the floor and is slow even here in what I think is about 1980. They ram each other into various things and Pedro misses a shoulder back inside. That ring sounds very metallic. The American hits a German on the Puerto Rican and they do the suplex but one guy gets his shoulder up in time spot to keep the title on Pedro. Too short to rate but bad as always on this tape.

Adrian beats Pedro up and hits him with the belt post match, only to get knocked to the floor himself.

Pat Patterson vs. Lou Albano

This is from 1982. Patterson is loved, Albano is hated. Albano immediately goes for the foreign object but Patterson knocks it out of his hands before the opening bell. He clocks Lou with it to bust him open so Albano Does The Mario for a bit. Albano gets knocked around for maybe two minutes and walks out. Patterson was just crazy over in New York.

Jake Roberts vs. Ricky Steamboat

This is also joined in progress. The idea here is that Jake DDTed him on the concrete on SNME, igniting a huge feud. This is just one of those stops along the way. Steamboat fires off martial arts to send Jake outside and the referee goes all nuts on Steamboat and shoves him away. Back in and Steamboat speeds things up but Jake catches him with a right hand to take over.

Dragon almost gets sent to the floor but he hangs on and hits a sunset flip for no count as Jake pops him in the face. Steamboat comes back with some neckbreakers but a splash attempt gets knees. Out to the floor and Jake wants to DDT him out there again but Ricky rams him into the barricade to escape. Back in and there’s a top rope chop. Jake is busted open. The referee pulls Steamboat off AGAIN and Ricky is getting ticked off. There’s a THIRD time and Jake gets in a shot as a result. Steamboat finally says screw it and shoves the referee for a DQ.

Rating: C-. What a breath of air this was. It wasn’t a great match or anything due to the annoying referee but when you’ve sat through an hour of Ted Arcidi and Jimmy Jack Funk, a Steamboat match sounds like water in the desert. This was ok but they would have far better brawls with far less annoying referees.

Overall Rating: F. Oh this was bad. The whole “newcomers” angle didn’t mean anything because the matches sucked. If I knew these were the next generation, I’d be getting some shoes on and going to the library instead of looking to see when WWF was on TV next. Just awful although the opening tag was good. Imagine: giving talented people a good deal of time and you get a good match.

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Best of the WWF Volume 11
Host: Gene Okerlund
Commentators: Gene Okerlund, Gorilla Monsoon

This is the latest one of the volumes I have left. After this one there are only four to go so we’re almost done at least. This is from mid 87 and most of the stuff on it is from November of 1986, which is at the end of Orndorff vs. Hogan and right before the build to Mania 3 begins. Let’s get to it.

Can-Am Connection vs. Dream Team

Can-Am is Tom Zenk/Rick Martel while the Dream Team is Valentine/Beefcake. Martel takes over quickly on Valentine, working the arm. Off to Zenk who works on the arm as well. We’re in MSG if you’re curious. Luscious John jumps on commentary for a second to brag. The team with the Canadian on it keeps up its advantage. Valentine manages to snake eyes him onto the top rope to take over.

Off to Beefcake and the former champs take over. Off to a chinlock and things speed up a bit. Brutus gets caught in a rollup for two. Martel starts fighting back and punches Valentine down. When all else fails, HIT HIM IN THE FACE! And never mind as the American hits an Irish on the Canadian into the corner. Suplex gets two. Figure Four is countered into a small package but Martel still can’t escape.

Back to Beefcake who manages to give up the tag. Listen to that pop for a hot tag! When’s the last time you heard something like that? Zenk cleans house and dropkicks Valentine down. Brutus takes him down again though and it’s back to the Dream Team in control. There’s an abdominal stretch by the Hammer. Gutbuster brings in Beefcake as they work on Zenk’s ribs and abdomen.

Zenk keeps bridging out of pin attempts. This match is getting some serious time. Double clothesline puts Zenk and Greg down. Valentine puts on a front facelock and Brutus distracts the referee so the tag doesn’t count. Elbow drop misses for Valentine and they do the blind tag thing again. That’s a rarity. Everything breaks down and the Dream Team hits a double belly to back suplex. There’s the Figure Four but Martel hits a slingshot splash for the totally illegal pin.

Rating: B. Long match here and it worked pretty well I thought. This is something you can’t see on TV due to the time but it worked well here. It also plays forward the whole Beefcake is the weak link idea of the team which led to their split. The crowd was way into this too. Good stuff.

George Steele vs. Kamala

Oh….oh…..oh my. This is from November 24, 1986. There are seven matches on this tape and four of them are from that show, plus a Piper’s Pit. Total comedy match with nothing really going on in the first minute or so. They exchange chops and therefore control with the fans being more into it than they should be. The Wizard (Kamala’s manager) gets hit and drops whatever he’s holding, allowing Kamala to clock Steele with it. That and a pair of splashes, one from the top rope, ends this. This was just a comedy match and then the ending.

Time for Piper’s Pit. This one is live in MSG and the guests are Orndorff and I believe his new manager Bobby Heenan. Piper says he’s not used to being cheered and that he’s not running for President and he’s the same person he’s always been. Heenan and Orndorff come out and Piper tells Orndorff to find a tag partner. Heenan gets the mic and says Orndorff’s partner is Harley Race. Heenan tells Piper to get a partner. Piper has a chat with his manager in the corner (no one there) but a planted fan pops up on the apron and suggests Hogan. Orndorff freaks and that’s that. Ok then.

Paul Orndorff/Harley Race vs. Hulk Hogan/Roddy Piper

These two teaming up together always feels wrong. Big brawl to start until Hogan and Piper clear the ring. The heels come back in so Hogan picks up Piper and uses his feet as a battering ram. Piper vs. Race officially gets us started. Off to Hulk and the place goes manic. They work on Race’s arm and it’s back to Piper for another big pop. Ok make it Hogan again. You know they work well together for mortal enemies.

They do look at each other with a bit of disdain and a lack of trust but if they didn’t it would be awful. Race headbutts his way out of trouble but still can’t bring Paul in. Back to Hulk and the arm work continues. The place is about to come unglued. Race finally gets in a belly to belly and knee drop to take over. Here’s Orndorff off the top and Piper is in trouble now.

The heels take turns on Piper and it’s off to a chinlock. This place is going to explode when Hogan gets the tag. Suplex keeps Roddy down and it’s off to Paul again. Race hammers away on Piper some more and headbutts him. Roddy stands still and looks like he’s about to fall down when he dives forward for the tag. That looked great. Race looks scared to death and Hogan pounds away. House is cleaned and he drops the leg but Orndorff saves. Heenan gets drilled and heel miscommunication lets Piper pin Race which counts for some reason.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches where it’s about the atmosphere instead of the match itself. Piper and Hogan teaming together is still a weird sight and I’m not sure how well I like it. Still though, fun little match that blew the roof off MSG (that thing has to be in disrepair given how often it happens) which is the entire idea.

Piper, still mostly a jerk, bails and lets Hogan fight them all off on his own which he does easily.

Randy Savage/Harley Race/Adrian Adonis vs. Roddy Piper/Junkyard Dog/Ricky Steamboat

This is elimination rules and it was a brand new idea at the time. They were popular enough that a PPV version was made later in the year. For some reason, Slick is on commentary. These are all matches at Wrestlemania and the last appearance in MSG for Piper so gee, I wonder who will win here. Savage runs and hides from Steamboat but they wind up starting.

Savage tries to roll away and it’s Race in now with no tag. Off to JYD and it’s rolling headbutts time. They look at each other for awhile as Steamboat plays cheerleader. Belly to belly puts JYD down and it’s off to Savage again. He loads up the elbow but stops to yell at Steamboat. Piper shoves Randy into the now legal Steamboat. My goodness I’d love to see Savage and Piper have a feud. Not the kind they had in WCW either.

Off to Adonis and he runs from Piper. Everything breaks down and all six are in there. A double suplex puts Roddy down and Adrian hooks the sleeper on him. That doesn’t last and Piper hooks a sleeper which is broken up just as quickly. JYD is waiting on an opponent now. I know it sounds like I’m skipping a lot but they’re moving in and out of there so fast that it’s almost impossible to keep up with.

Adonis works on the Dog but hits him in the head because heels are stupid. Everyone goes to the floor and Roddy hits Adrian with a chair. Back to some form of sanity as Piper hits a belly to back suplex on Race but Savage breaks up the cover. This has been incredibly fast paced. And there’s a bell. Uh……why? Adonis and JYD were both counted out because they were legal. Ok then.

Piper vs. Race now and make that Piper vs. Savage. Piper blocks a suplex as Gorilla and Slick argue. Savage misses a shot into the ropes but Race prevents the tag. And never mind as he makes it just a second later. Steamboat speeds things up on Race as Slick yells about karate. Everyone gets in again and my goodness is there some talent in there. There isn’t a bad combination at all out there.

Steamboat rolls up Race but Savage reverses it and somehow it gets the pin, after about 15 seconds of Steamboat being down. I don’t think so but whatever. Ok so it’s Piper vs. Race/Savage. Piper of course is all cool with going straight for Race and they go to the floor. Savage tries to hit him with a chair but they get back in and somehow Savage is now legal. Top rope double axe gets two. Powerslam gets two for Race. Piper grabs a gutwrench suplex but Savage makes the save.

Savage goes up but the double axe hits Race, allowing Piper to steal a pin and it’s 1-1. Now THIS should be awesome. And this is how Piper goes out of MSG? This works I’d think. Race won’t leave so Piper throws Savage into him and then bulldogs Randy down. Savage tries to bail but suckers Piper in and gets the first punch in. That weird clothesline Savage does takes Roddy down for two.

They start choking away at each other and this is so awesome. Piper actually shows off his strength and holds Savage up in a choke. They collide and Savage is knocked to the floor. Piper gets up but then lays down and plays possum. Savage goes up for the elbow but Piper moves and a small package ends the Macho Man. TOTALLY AWESOME and vintage Piper.

Rating: A. I had a blast with this. The talent levels out there were completely insane and they gave us twenty minutes of a great match. These matches could work so well if they were done right and this one was, especially when they have the time to put it together. The eliminations were a bit off, but this was probably the first one ever. Great match though and an absolute blast.

From SNME, here’s Piper’s My Way video set to Frank Sinatra’s song. It’s basically a highlight video of his career which is pretty awesome stuff. It’s set to the closing theme from Coliseum Video here though, probably due to copyright issues. This goes on for about three minutes.

And now let’s go from an hour of totally awesome stuff to….this.

Little Tokyo/Lord Littlebrook vs. Pepe Gomez/Karate Kid

Thank goodness this is joined in progress because the full thing is 13 minutes long. Gomez beats up Tokyo with kicks. Wouldn’t it be Karate Kid using the kicks? The heels get thrown together and it’s the stupid row boat thing. Wait that is Karate Kid? Ok so I was confused earlier. Actually I wasn’t paying attention because I don’t care about this match. There’s a “comedy” spot where Littlebrook is choking with his feet but the good guys make a switch and Littlebrook accidentally choked his partner.

Ok so Gomez is in the body suit. The referee is holding Tokyo for some reason then launches him away. Is there a point to this? I mean…..any of this? Littlebrook, looking about 80 years old, staggers around and the match just kind of stops. Karate Kid uses a full nelson and Tokyo accidentally kicks Littlebrook in the face. I’m not really paying attention as I’m rapidly losing all of my intelligence as my brain dies. Littlebrook beats up both guys and it’s off to Gomez for some dropkicks. It’s a pile up and Tokyo gets pinned.

Rating: N. Just no. No point, no logic, no reason, no need. Give us more Piper greatness please. This tape was reaching classic levels and now it had to get dragged down like this. I get the idea of comedy matches and having fun, but don’t do it for like seven minutes in a row when you have awesome stuff going like that.

Don Muraco vs. Hillbilly Jim

Muraco is dressed like Piper and Fuji is with him in a tux. Remember that. Muraco is wrestling in the kilt. Jim rips it off quickly and the beating begins. Muraco is sent to the floor and Fuji’s hat got crushed. Muraco hides in the corner and Jim works on the arm. A headbutt puts Don on the floor. Muraco takes him down and it’s off to a nerve hold. Jim comes back and hits a big boot. Bear hug (called a full nelson by Monsoon for some reason) draws in Fuji for the DQ.

Rating: D. Jim was a fun character and this was designed to set up the next match and that’s all. Muraco was definitely on the downside of his career at this point but he still had a few more years on the top level to go. Fuji interfering directly sets up the next match on the tape which is always cool to see.

Fuji tears Jim’s overalls and hits him in the ribs with the cane a bunch of times. Jim challenges Fuji to a tuxedo match next month.

Hillbilly Jim vs. Mr. Fuji

This is a tuxedo match. It’s an evening gown match but for men. Jim rips the hat off immediately. I wouldn’t bet on this lasting long. They fight over tearing jackets off and Jim gets his shirt ripped. Jim tears out the pocket of Fuji’s jacket as does Fuji to Jim’s. Fuji steals the jacket and Jim is mad. Fuji’s jacket gets ripped so he kicks Jim low. Jim is topless now and as I type that Fuji is as well. And there go Fuji’s pants to end it. I’m not rating it because it’s not really much of a match but it was all in good fun.

Overall Rating: B-. This was on the way to being incredible and then it just came falling apart. The six man should have ended this tape but instead we get the comedy matches to end it, which isn’t a horrible idea but it really hurt the flow this had going. The opener is good too and I can easily see why this is my favorite time in wrestling. Good tape, could have been great.

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Best of the WWF Volume 2
Host: Gorilla Monsoon
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Gene Okerlund, Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

This is a weird time for the WWF as it’s pre-Hogan dominance (although he was champion) and Sammartino is out of the picture. Backlund had just lost the title as the people have turned on him harder than they have on Cena today. There are some historical moments on this tape though which is a big rarity in this series. Let’s get to it.

Coliseum Video opening and all that jazz.

Gorilla looks WEIRD with some hair on his head.

Tag Titles: Tony Atlas/Rocky Johnson vs. Adrian Adonis/Dick Murdoch

We have, in order, Abraham Washington’s sidekick, Rock’s dad, a not yet gay man and a guy formerly known as Captain Redneck who was a real life member of the KKK. Atlas and Johnson are champions. This is from a TV taping in Hamburg, Pennsylvania from April of 1984. Adonis vs. Johnson gets us going. The champ armdrags everyone in sight and takes over with an armbar on Adonis.

And there’s no commentary for awhile. Kind of a nice change of pace actually. Adonis cartwheels away from a monkey flip but walks into a slam and armbar. Off to Murdoch and he’s earned an armdrag as well. Atlas comes in and I like getting to see some of their stuff. I don’t get to see much from the pre-Hogan era so this is pretty cool. The challengers get Atlas in the corner and pound away on him.

This is before the tag team formula was perfected so things are a bit different than what you’d likely be used to. Headbutt by Atlas puts Murdoch down but Adonis cheats to keep control. Off to Rocky who dances about and beats up everyone. Well not his partner. Or the referee. The fans either for that matter. Gee maybe he isn’t beating everyone up. Atlas and Murdoch fight to the floor as everything breaks down. In the melee, Adonis rolls him up with an O’Connor Roll (while standing on his head. Take that Ziggler) for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C. The match was fine but what surprised me the most was how short it was. Unless there was some clipping that I missed (and I don’t think there was), this was six minutes long at most. It’s very rare to see quick title matches like this back in the day but it was pretty entertaining while it lasted.

Intercontinental Title: Pedro Morales vs. Don Muraco

This is from MSG in January of 83. Morales had taken the title from Muraco over a year ago. See, back then title reigns were VERY different. The title was introduced in 1979 and Ricky Steamboat was the 11th reign in 1987. In 8 years, the title changed hands 10 times. Think about that. Of the first ten reigns, the shortest was five months. Today, that would be a long reign. Back then it was by far the shortest. Three of the first ten lasted over a year. Think about that for a minute and now compare it to today.

As for this match, Muraco jumps the champ in the corner but Morales fights back quickly. Morales rips half of the shirt off Muraco and the challenger is in trouble. Corner sunset flip gets two for Morales. Muraco has a sleeve of his shirt still hanging off his arm. Pedro knocks him to the floor and this is all Morales so far. Muraco does a Flair Flop off the apron to the floor.

Pedro goes up top but doesn’t dive onto him as Don hides under the floor. That was pretty smart. Muraco tries to hide as Morales stalks him. Boot to the back of the head and it’s all Pedro. Gorilla criticizes him for not going for the kill, which is pretty good analysis. And there’s a low blow by Muraco and both guys are down. Still using the t-shirt, Muraco chokes Pedro with it in the corner, only to get low blowed as well.

Ok NOW the t-shirt is finally gone. A running knee in the corner misses for Morales though and he might have blown it out. There’s a lot of blowing in this match. Muraco moves in on it with a leg snap out of the corner. Clipped to a spinning toe hold being countered by Pedro. Morales, ever the genius, tries a backbreaker (despite sending Muraco’s shoulder into the post on the counter) and reinjures his knee. Boston Crab (Pedro’s finisher) is quickly broken by the ropes. Pedro tries a slam but the knee buckles and Muraco falls on top for the pin and the second title change in two matches on this tape.

Rating: C-. Not great or anything but again it’s really cool to see these rarities as you always hear about how these legends held titles but you never see how they won them. Pedro was far better in the 70s than 80s as he was washed up at this point, but he could still put people over, which is what he did here. Decent stuff, although a lot of stalling hurt it.

Killer Kowalski vs. Pedro Morales

Talk about legends. Now Kowalski was the big time brawler of his day. He also trained HHH so there’s his biggest contribution to wrestling more than likely. This would be about 8 months after Pedro lost the world title, putting it in late July of 74. We’re in MSG here of course. Jesse Ventura is alone on commentary here. That’s a new one on me. Kowalski used the Claw on various body parts so he uses it on the leg here. Pedro’s leg problems seem to be a theme on this tape.

Clipped to more leg work. Jesse doing play by play is a very odd thing. He doesn’t shut up but keeps things fresh somehow. It’s more like a radio broadcast. The Claw is something that needs a good announcer to put it over because just from a visual perspective, it looks really stupid. Pedro comes back with some left hands and grabs Killer by the ears. Back to the knee and Pedro is in trouble again. How did this guy win the first triple crown?

They trade punches to the ribs and Morales takes over. Jesse is surprisingly good at play by play. Morales is left handed if that gives you a better mental picture of this. Morales grabs the Claw on the ribs. Clipped to a double stomp by Kowalski. This commentary has been recorded far later as Jesse talks about Kowalski like he’s retired, which he would have been. Kowalski bites the face and Pedro bites back. Killer takes him down but misses a double stomp. Off to the Claw on the stomach again and Pedro is in trouble. They brawl to the floor and it’s thrown out. WEAK.

Rating: D. I love old school stuff and I’ve always liked Pedro, but this was boring. The Claw is one of those moves that works as a quick finisher but having it in there all the time like this got really boring after awhile. At least it wasn’t very long. Kowalski is a guy that seems like he’d be better in quick spurts. This match felt like it would have been better for a live crowd, which is fine, but it does bring into question why it’s on a tape.

Jamaica Kid/Billy the Kid vs. Sky Low Low/Little Brutus

MIDGET TIME!!! This is from I’d assume the 70s and it’s joined in progress. Clipped almost immediately and I have no idea who is who out there. The fans seem to be laughing more than watching. Low Low gets out of a crucifix hold from Billy and it’s a decent power display all things considered. Clipped again to a chase scene. Where’s my Benny Hill music? Apparently this is from 1970. Oh dear. Sky goes up and gets caught in the ropes, falling down to the apron. He looked like a baby. There’s some miscommunication between the kids and we’re clipped again. Sky pins Billy off a shoulder from Brutus. No rating, obviously.

Jamaica Kid taunts the winners post match and has to jump into the arms of the referee. WAIT THIS IS TWO OUT OF THREE FALLS??? WHY??? And we’re clipped….to another match? Cool with me man.

Sky Low Low/Little Brutus vs. Joey Russell/Sunny Boy Hayes

It’s a chase scene and a “comedy” match. These guys can’t even hit each other with punches. Clipped and Sky won’t come in against let’s say Hayes. The only date I can find on this is “the 70s”. Sky cheats so I’d presume they’re heels. That’s good for the pin, thank goodness.

Great. Another 2/3 falls match. Brutus beats Russell up a lot and it’s a dog pile on the referee. Sky kicks him and it’s COMEDY! And again they just stop showing the match and again I smile.

Chief Jay Strongbow vs. Professor Toru Tanaka

The ring is very small here. They start with a crisscross as Gorilla talks about a different style, which means more rest holds. Alfred Hayes is the commentator here. This is joined in progress as we’re told it’s five minutes in after about 90 seconds. Tanaka hits the ropes, Strongbow says stop, Tanaka stops, Strongbow hits him. It’s a different time. Tanaka works on the arm but Strongbow hits a pair of headscissors to send Tanaka down.

Tanaka hooks a top wristlock which goes on for awhile. Strongbow chops him down but Tanaka goes back to the arm. This is as exciting as it sounds. Jay hooks a headscissors on the mat and this is just going nowhere. Clipped to Tanaka choking as Jay tries to get up. Oh it’s a nerve hold. My mistake. Strongbow comes back with his war dance and it finally wakes up a bit with a brawl. Tanaka tries the salt but it gets caught and that’s a DQ. Oh joy.

Rating: D. Yeah I get that this is a different era and all that, but that doesn’t mean it’s an interesting one. This was a lot of laying around in a hold while we waited on anything to happen. Also, could they really not just have it end with a big chop (Jay’s finisher) or something? Did it have to be ANOTHER match thrown out?

And now for a musical interlude. No really.

Mean Gene sings Tutti Fruti with Captain Lou on piano, Hogan on bass and a bunch of other musicians playing other stuff. Gene is playing piano also. Hulk gets to solo on bass. This is out of nowhere and goes as quickly as it came.

Intercontinental Title: Tito Santana vs. Paul Orndorff

This is from September 1, 1984 in St. Louis. I know because there’s a graphic that says September 1, 1984 in St. Louis. Orndorff is a top heel here but not quite Piper’s levels. Tito is a house of fire to start. Must have had the extra hot sauce on his taco today. The fans chant Paula and there are even signs. Technical stuff to start as they fight for control. Top wristlock by Tito and he finally gets him down.

Back to the mat and Tito cranks on the arm. Orndorff tries to fight out but we need to work on that arm some more. Clipped to the armbar still on but the two guys on their feet now. Orndorff grabs an atomic drop and Tito is in trouble. Knee lift puts Santana on the floor. Outside now and there’s another atomic drop. Tito’s shoulder is bleeding a bit. Orndorff actually does the RVD thumb point.

Tito comes back in with a sunset flip but Paul punches him in the head to stop him. Off to a chinlock which doesn’t last long. Tito hits him with some shots but a suplex puts him right back down. Cross body gets two for Tito. The fans are way into this. Santana starts hitting him in the kidneys and a knee lift puts Paul down. Orndorff tries a middle rope splash but it eats knees.

Tito gets all fired up and pounds Paul down with what Jesse would call that firey Latin temper of his. Boston Crab is countered but Paul goes into the buckle anyway. That gets two but Tito gets his head taken off by a clothesline. That gets two and this is a VERY slow referee. Orndorff stomps away in the same style that Lance Storm used. Paul gets in another shot but time runs out at about 14:30 shown so a lot must have been cut.

Rating: B-. Fun match but I’d have liked to see the full version. It’s not quite the classic that it’s hyped up as here but this was still pretty fun. Orndorff was better than he was given credit for but he was caught between two legendary feuds so his stuff with Hogan is often forgotten, which is a shame.

We look at some surprising finishes. First up: Rocky Johnson vs. Magnificent (Don) Muraco. Muraco is busted open but Muraco throws the referee in the way so Johnson hits him for a DQ. I’m assuming that saved the title for him.

Freddie Blassie vs. Bobo Brazil in what has to be from the early 60s. They fight with Blassie on the apron and Bobo headbutts him down. Blassie’s foot is tied in the rope and it’s a countout. Bobo headbutts him again during a post match handshake. What a jerk! Blassie hits the referee because he didn’t want to do the Twazzle.

Andre beat a jobber but the masked jobber jumped him post match. Andre ripped the mask off and it’s….a jobber.

Moondogs vs. Tony Garea/Rick Martel with Monsoon as referee. This is for the tag titles and it’s a Texas Deathmatch, which we would call a street fight. Abdominal stretch to Moondog King and then Rex jumps off the top onto Monsoon. The champs retain off a double backdrop.

Tag Titles: Tony Garea/Rick Martel vs. Mr. Fuji/Mr. Saito

This is from 81 and Garea/Martel are still champions. In Philly here and Albano is managing the challengers. Fuji vs. Martel to start and Fuji gets tossed around a lot. Off to Saito after Fuji can’t do anything with either champion. Martel hits a body press for two. Back to the armbar and Fuji is back in trouble already. Off to Garea who stays on the arm. The challengers finally get in some shots to take over.

Fuji does his usual cheating and down goes Garea to a chop. Back to Saito who chokes away. It’s weird hearing Pat Patterson with that thick accent on commentary. Garea gets in a knee but can’t make the tag due to Fuji. There’s a nerve hold and the challengers do the switch without the tag. Garea gets in a few shots but a dropkick misses, meaning no tag.

Back to Saito who gets two off a slam. Middle rope knee gets the same. Saito cranks on a front facelock and Martel finally slaps and runs in for some help. It actually works and Garea makes the hot tag. House is cleaned and everything breaks down. Albano slips Fuji the salt as Martel goes up. Fuji throws it at Martel in mid air and Martel’s cross body is rolled through for the titles to Japan.

Rating: B-. Solid old school style tag match which worked quite well. The ending spot looked great with that dive being timed perfectly. It makes sense that Martel is in trouble so he couldn’t hold Saito down as well. Vince morphed into Mr. McMahon as he ranted on the end of that too.

Overall Rating: C+. This is just barely better good than bad. The historical stuff with an unheard of three title changes for one of these tapes is very cool and some of the matches were quite good too. The midget stuff though and some of those matches though were just dreadful but overall, it’s more good than bad which is more than you can ask for most of the time in these things. Good stuff.

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Best of the WWF Volume 4
Host: Vince McMahon
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Lord Alfred Hayes, Gene Okerlund

Remember how I said I’d be doing two of these at once? This is the second one. We’re looking at a much older time in the company, probably about 5 months after the first Wrestlemania. In other words, everything is still about Hogan vs. Piper and company, with Paul Orndorff starting to hang out with and fight for Hogan somewhat. Big money would follow. Let’s get to it.

That Coliseum Video is still awesome.

Paul Orndorff vs. Roddy Piper

This is from MSG and the aftermath of the loss at Mania. Piper actually said he screwed up. That should sum up the rareness of this one. The crowd is ERUPTING and they’re on the floor very quickly. Paul grabs the arm and Piper messes up Paul’s hair. You don’t do that in the 80s! Piper tries everything he can think of but can’t break the wristlock. Piper gets a knee up in the corner and a clothesline sends Orndorff to the outside.

Back in Orndorff grabs a fast backslide for two but gets his eyes poked to change the momentum again. They go back to the floor again and Piper shakes his arm. See how easy it is? You see? The brawl begins all over again but Orndorff gets sent into the post. Piper hooks a front facelock and shifts it to a choke as often as he can. After a few failed attempts, Orndorff manages to bridge up into a backslide for two.

Paul slugs away and they go to the floor again. Now Orndorff pulls his hair to make up for the unfair cosmetic attack earlier. He pulls Piper back in by the hair (FREAKING OW) and Piper shakes like a fish on a plate. Orndoff goes up…and here’s Bob Orton to shove him off for the DQ. I guess Orton wasn’t happy with his “friend” having his hair messed with like that.

Rating: C+. Rather fun brawl although not much of a match. Still though, after watching that awful show I just sat through, how much can you complain about this? This was a super hot feud back in the day and it would continue on for a few more months until. Fun brawl and really fun to see them both, probably at their in ring peaks.

The pair beats down Orndorff for a good while until the Bulldogs make the save, probably to set up a future six man.

Hulk Hogan/Jimmy Snuka vs. Don Muraco/Bob Orton

In Boston which means a hot crowd. Hogan is champion (duh) and Jimmy is probably the second most popular guy in the company. More Mania fallout stuff here. Big brawl to start and the good guys clear the ring. Snuka and Orton officially start and Bob gets his cast beaten on. Well that’s a very slow healing injury after all. They work on the arm for awhile with Hogan even coming in off the middle rope with a shot.

The arm hits the post and at this point it’s still a fresh injury, only having been broken for a month or so. Back to Snuka and the beating continues. The Human Banana comes back in and Orton can’t get anything going. Big atomic drop has Orton in trouble but he manages to trip Hogan to bring in Muraco. Gee Hogan went down quickly there. Clipped to Orton hitting a nice delayed vertical on Hogan.

Back to Muraco with some nice heel double teaming. They collide and there’s the hot tag to Snuka. The camera cuts to a shot of the crowd and a kid pops up right in front of the camera like in a horror movie. Fuji gets up on the apron for a distraction and Orton hits Snuka with the cast. Hogan takes a shot too and Snuka is busted. OH MAN is he cut. Hogan goes into the post on the floor and we’re clipped to more beating on Snuka. He gets a shot in though and it’s off to Hogan finally. Orton pops him with the cast almost immediately and it gets thrown out.

Rating: C+. I liked this one a lot and I’d have loved to see the full version of it. That and a decisive ending instead of the DQ but whatever. This was Hogan 101 back in the day: find some guy to tag with, find a pair of heels, and watch the guy get bigger than he was going to be able to get on his own. They’re trying that with Cena and Ryder at the moment, but it’s not working so well because Ryder looks like a helpless chick (remember Cena holding him?) in the whole thing.

Big brawl post match again.

Battle Royal

There are 20 people in this and it’s from 1982 so I’m not going to bother figuring out who they all are. Just to give you some of the names: Atlas, SD Jones, Valentine, the Blackjacks, Morales, Fuji, Adonis (Biker, not yet gay), both Strongbows, Rodz, Estrada, Skiluna (thanks for listing all of these guys Vince) and others. Snuka goes out. Masa Saito is in there too.

Ivan Putski and Tiger Chung Lee are in this also. Garea is out there so that has to be most of them. Blackjack Mulligan and Putski are out. Swede Hanson is there too. That leaves one I don’t know. Apparently his name is Laurette Suce. Ok then. I know I butchered that. Garea is put out. Saito goes out as well. Either there are 21 people in this or I can’t count as a guy named Steve Travis chops Hanson.

Clipped to a bit later so I have no idea who is still in this. Morales pops Adonis in the face a few times and sends him flying. Someone goes out that we miss. It was both Strongbow brothers. Fuji is gone too. Adonis is tied in the ropes. That’s not a horrible place to be actually. I think there are about ten left. Pedro gets triple teamed in the corner and is finally put out.

Yeah there are nine left and no I won’t name them, mainly because I don’t know who they are. The fans are about 99% behind Atlas. Vince says Suce throws punches like a girl. Someone (the name Vince gives them) is out. Valentine is really busted open. Suce is gone as is someone else and all of a sudden they’re flying out.

Ok so the final four are Jones, Atlas, Valentine and Adonis. We get something like a mini tag match and heel miscommunication abounds. Tony beats up Valentine and the heels get slammed together. This is in Philadelphia if you’re curious. Powerslam by Adonis to Jones. Adonis busts out a top rope elbow, which would be a huge spot at this point. Off to a sleeper while on the other side, Valentine is tied up between the ropes. Atlas fights up and dumps Adonis with no acknowledgment at all from Vince. He wasn’t that good yet.

Atlas goes OFF on Valentine and knocks him into the corner with a headbutt. A dropkick by Jones almost puts Valentine out, so he fires a second one and Valentine is gone. He was practically out on his feet anyway. That makes the final two SD Jones and Tony Atlas. They hug, and I absolutely kid you not, flip a coin to decide the winner. Atlas wins. I’ll give them this: it’s a new one.

Rating: C. Well it certainly was different. This was a very refreshing kind of battle royal with no huge stars in it, making the whole thing just kind of fun. Vince mentioned the winner getting money so at least there was a reason for them to fight. Not a classic or anything but I liked it. The ending was creative and at least they were cheered.

We get a special segment on the wrestlers’ specialties, or finishers as we would call them. It’s really just a set of clips of the guys using them. Steamboat’s is just listed as “Karate.” These might just be signatures instead of finishers. Orndorff’s is “Strength.” Is he a Pokemon? Stan Hansen is in this. Bruno’s is “All The Right Moves.” Ok then. My goodness he’s a hairy man. Yeah Hogan is listed as a clothesline and an elbow. Seriously? There are a ton of these that I’m not mentioning because they’re just guys doing moves. The Superfly Splash is always cool, especially the cage dive. The Bulldogs use “acrobatics.”

Andre the Giant vs. Killer Khan

This is a Mongolian Stretcher Match. Khan had broken Andre’s ankle so you have to beat one person down until they have to be carried out on a stretcher. We’re in Philly. Khan tries to run but Andre pulls him back in by the hair. Andre sits on him and the referees try to put him on the stretcher but he’s not done yet. Khan tries to backdrop him so Andre busts out a piledriver. A falling headbutt misses though and Khan goes after the ankle for some continuity. Khan drops a bunch of knees and calls for the stretcher. That just ticks the Giant off and here comes the pain.

Andre can’t really follow up though because of his ankle. His solution? HE SITS ON KHAN’S HEAD! Khan holds onto the ropes so Andre jumps on him SIX TIMES IN A ROW. Khan tries to grab the apron skirt and stays in. Oh this isn’t going to end well. Andre suplexes him, sits on him AGAIN, and splashes him to end this. Khan is DEAD.

Rating: C-. No it wasn’t that good, but man Andre’s destruction of Khan was something to see. Khan laying there like that was great as he looked like he had been completely destroyed. Fun stuff but Andre being a monster that is ticked off is always at least worth a look. Also cool to see him in better shape like this.

Andre the Giant vs. Big John Studd

This is in a cage, before Wrestlemania, and joined in progress. This is just here for the ending. Studd is busted open already but manages to get in some shots and goes for the door. Andre stops him and drops a leg to break that up. Andre easily slams him and goes up. He goes to the top and JUMPS DOWN ONTO STUDD’S CHEST!!! When did this turn into a snuff tape??? No rating, but my goodness Studd has to be dead.

Andre the Giant vs. King Kong Bundy

By jove I think we’ve got a theme going here! This is called the Colossal Jostle for no apparent reason. Albano is with Andre to counter Hart. Andre goes right for him as this is about revenge from a Bundy attack in Toronto. Bundy gets chopped in the corner and knocked to the floor. Clipped to Bundy getting knocked back to the floor. Clipped again to Bundy knocking Andre down. Bundy goes after the injured sternum which was hurt by a bunch of splashes at the aforementioned Toronto show. Andre fires off some shoulders in the corner to take over. Bundy runs into a boot in the corner and here’s Studd for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Pretty dull stuff here but at least they kept it relatively short. The clipping really hurt it….I think. It might have helped it but it’s kind of hard to tell. Not terrible but definitely worse than the Khan match. This would result in Hogan coming in to help Andre….I think.

Dream Team vs. Tito Santana/Ricky Steamboat

This is in Toronto. My goodness that’s quite a face team. Ricky vs. Beefcake starts us off. The ring is quickly cleared and Ricky hits what we would call a springboard forearm to take over. Off to Tito as the camera stuff is really all over the place here. Jesse sounds like he has a sore throat. Valentine and Santana stall a lot so Brutus slams Tito and then brings in Greg.

Valentine misses an elbow and it’s back to more stalling. I can barely recognize Jesse’s voice. That’s how messed up it is. Big clothesline puts Valentine down but the Figure Four is broken up. Greg takes over and works over the arm. Off to Bruti who can’t do much more than choke at this point. This is before the Expresses established the tag team formula so things are a bit different here.

Tito grabs an armbar but his back is to the wrong corner so he can’t get anything going. Back to Beefcake in control via a headlock. In a nice sequence, Beefcake points at Steamboat to distract the referee and Valentine gets in a shot to the back of Santana. With Ricky trying to get in, Santana gets on all fours and tries to bob and weave, eventually diving through Beefcake’s legs for the HOT tag to Steamboat.

Sleeper goes on Beefcake but he pretty easily breaks it up. Valentine comes in to hammer on Ricky and an eye rake slows the Dragon down. The Dream Team (not sure if they’re named that yet or if Steamboat is the Dragon) works him over and Valentine starts loading up the Figure Four but Steamboat small packages him for two. Steamboat fights out of the corner and makes ANOTHER hot tag to Santana. The forearm gets two on Valentine and everything breaks down. Ricky is sent to the floor but he comes back off the top to take Brutus out. Santana counters an atomic drop, hooks the leg and the Figure Four ends this.

Rating: B. Great old school tag match here and more proof that you don’t need some big long back story to have a great match. These four had no history together outside of Valentine beating Santana for the IC Title and that was like 6 months prior to this. Very fun wrestling match here and we didn’t need Teddy Long to book it.

Overall Rating: C+. A lot of this is going to depend on your tastes. Other than the main event the matches aren’t great but there’s nothing on here that’s really bad. However if you don’t like old school stuff, this certainly isn’t going to be your taste. Good, fun show though and I liked it a lot. Good luck finding it though.

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Best of the WWF Volume 14
Host: Gorilla Monsoon
Commentators: Craig DeGeorge, Bruno Sammartino, Jesse Ventura

I found the rest of these that I have to do so I’ll be doing four batches of two each to finish them up. Due to how annoyed I got with the Clash series though, I’ll be doing other shows in between. Anyway this tape would be from late 87 so Hogan is on the verge of losing the title and we’re just before the Survivor Series or maybe just after it. Let’s get to it.

Rougeau Brothers/Brutus Beefcake vs. Dream Team/Johnny Valiant

This is a dark match from a Superstars taping in Indianapolis. Ray vs. Dino to start us off. Dino keeps running as you would expect him to. Valentine tries to cheat by holding Ray but Ray avoids the jumping knee. The place ERUPTS on something that simple. It’s amazing how you never see that anymore. Beefcake comes in and goes for Greg’s hair, resulting in the heels congregating on the floor.

Valiant, a manager remember, hides on the floor. Beefcake gets caught in the corner and even Valiant gets in some time on offense. Beefcake grabs a sleeper on Valentine but Valiant makes the save. Both Rougeaus come in and pound on Bravo as the place loses its mind. Boston Crab by Ray is broken up by Valentine, which draws Ray into the bad corner.

Back to Greg who gets a shoulderbreaker for two. In a pretty impressive power display, Ray counters a piledriver into the position for an Alabama Slam, but instead he walks towards his corner with Valentine on his back. Greg doesn’t let him get the tag but still it was impressive. Ray is on the floor and we’re clipped to a later point of him on the floor. Bravo drops another elbow and we’re clipped to Valentine in there instead.

Back to Bravo and Dino hammers away. This is the WWE 24/7 version so the big WWF Superstars of Wrestling banner is censored. Off to Johnny V and they just kind of let Ray tag in Brutus. He and Jacques clean house and it all breaks down. The heels are all thrown together and a pair of dropkicks send the non-managers to the floor. Valiant is put in the sleeper and we’re done.

Rating: C. This was fine. You never see stuff like this in modern wrestling and that’s a shame. There’s nothing too bad here and it was just a six man tag. The fans get to be happy and the faces get a win. There’s no bigger plan here and none of the guys really seem to be all obsessed about moving up the card. All that matters here is getting a win. Why can’t we see more of that?

Beefcake paints Valiant’s hair post match.

Ron Bass vs. Ricky Steamboat

This is a Wrestling Challenge match here, which is the equivalent of Superstars today. I don’t recognize that commentator. One of them is Mike McGuirk (female announcer), one is Nick Bockwinkel and I don’t recognize the third. I think it’s current TNA boss Bruce Pritchard. We’ll go with that. Bass is a cowboy and gets caught with a top rope chop to send him to the floor.

Bockwinkel talks about whether or not top rope moves should be banned. Give me a break. McGuirk is talking about how handsome/good looking Steamboat is. Ok then. Bass takes over and hits a chop for two. Powerslam gets the same. Swinging neckbreaker gets countered and both guys are down. Steamboat counters a suplex into one of his own. They slug it out from their knees and then ram heads. Sleeper is countered by Bass and they go to the floor. They brawl to a double countout.

Rating: F. Horribly dull match here as both guys were in about -5th gear the whole time. Steamboat was coming back from the time off where his wife had a baby (and he lost the IC Title as a result) so maybe it was rust. This was awful though and probably the worst Steamboat match I’ve ever seen.

Steamboat actually wins via countout, in case you were going to write me a very angry letter.

Koko B. Ware vs. Danny Davis

In MSG here. Davis is an ex-referee and has Jimmy with him. Davis pounds away to start as we have Heenan, Hayes and Gorilla on commentary here which is a nice change of pace over what we just had to sit through. Anyone else think they’re stretching for Best of the WWF with this? Davis fires away on him but Koko easily knocks him back outside. Back in, Koko backdrops him, we go back outside. By this I mean Davis hides out there.

Back in, for some reason Davis wants a handshake but Koko gets him to put his hand on the mat where he can stomp on it. Back to the floor AGAIN. For the love of…..THEY DID IT AGAIN!!! STAY IN THE FREAKING RING ALREADY!!! Davis gets in, doesn’t touch Koko, and runs back to the floor. Seriously, that’s the sixth time in less than five minutes. Test of strength wastes even more time.

Koko dances around, hits a dropkick, and Davis is outside for the seventh time. Koko sends him into the corner but misses what we would call a Bronco Buster to a standing Davis to change control. Davis works on him using stuff that would make Darren Young call it boring. Sleeper goes on for awhile until Koko throws on one of his own. Davis tries a splash but it hits knees. They go out to the floor (9) and Danny tries to go out again but Koko grabs him for a bunch of headbutts. Koko pounds on him and the referee pulls him off, allowing Hart to slip Davis something. The weakest punch ever with an object ends this.

Rating: F. Oh brother these last two matches have not been kind to the first one. Having Davis go outside nearly ten times and then the way it finished….oh dear. I get that Davis is a referee and not supposed to be very good, but that doesn’t mean that he should be out there for nearly 15 minutes. Horribly dull match that was supposed to be comedy but was missing the funny parts.

Junkyard Dog vs. Ted DiBiase

Holy Mid-South Batman! Dog backdrops him while his song is still playing to start this fast. From what I can find this is at a Wrestling Challenge taping in Green Bay, Wisconsin. DiBiase is pretty new at this point but hasn’t quite hit his stride yet. DiBiase tries to run away and stall. If this turns into another Davis match I might go find some ECW to watch. It has to be more exciting than this. Ted rams JYD’s head into the buckle and that just fails.

Out to the floor as Bockwinkel and McGuirk argue over who has a harder head. I’m not touching that one. Dog gets on all fours for the headbutts but DiBiase rolls to the floor. McGuirk’s contribution to the match: “Both men want a win in this match.” What would we do without you? Dog works on the arm but misses a falling headbutt to give DiBiase momentum.

DiBiase drops the falling punches. I wonder if that’s a momentum deal or what. Why drop them like that? In something you won’t often see, DiBiase goes up for the jump into the foot spot, but instead he jumps into Dog’s fist. That’s a new one. Virgil gets involved and dropped on the floor. DiBiase tries to suplex Dog back in but Dog falls on him but DiBiase rolls through for the pin.

Rating: D. Still boring and not a good match at all, but it’s way better than the previous one. Know the main reason why? THEY ACTUALLY WRESTLED. Dog was old and slow at this point but he was still a name that you could still get something out of beating. Nothing to see here though and DiBiase would take off soon.

Spiros Arion/Yukon Lumberjacks vs. Andre the Giant/Tony Garea/Dino Bravo

This is from the late 70s. The Lumberjacks are the tag champions and named Eric and Pierre. We’re in MSG here and this is 2/3 falls. Very international match here with three Canadians, a Frenchman, a Greek and a New Zealander. Vince is the lone commentator here and actually calls Andre Andre Roussimoff. Eric is the Lumberjack with blonde hair. Got it. He starts with Garea.

Two quick armdrags send Eric running to bring in Arion. I think we’re clipped but I’m not sure. This is just punching. Off to Pierre, meaning Garea has fought all three guys now. Off to a top wristlock and I think the camera is just jumping around a lot. Either that or it’s the best clipping I’ve ever seen. Eric comes in again and gets slammed. The heels finally get Tony into the corner but Andre breaks that up, drawing a DQ for the first fall. I forgot it was 2/3 so that bell was really surprising. Oh wait the Lumberjacks got disqualified for the triple teaming. Ok then.

Garea and Eric start the second fall as well. Bravo comes in for the first time and I’ve never seen him move that fast. Arion comes in and we get a crisscross. Bravo beats Eric up for awhile but Pierre comes in to take over. A slam gets two. Off to Andre and the place erupts. See, this is something you don’t have in WWE anymore: an attraction. Andre was someone that was beloved and the people didn’t care what he did.

Andre here is in the last match of the night (more brilliant booking. Why have him in the middle and let everyone leave after he’s been in the ring? More beers and Cokes sold while people wait) and it’s a worthless six man tag, but the people want to see him. It’s not about some angle or the world title or whatever. It’s about Andre and whatever he’s doing. The people told the company what they wanted to see and that’s who got the big spot. Not the other way around. Very key difference. As for the match, a splash ends it about 10 seconds after Andre comes in.

Rating: C-. The match was boring, but it’s amazing to see something like Andre when he was still young(ish) and could move. The crowd reacts to him and that’s all it needs to be. He didn’t have to spend ten minutes sucking up to them. He was cool and the fans reacted to it. What more did you need than that?

Paul Orndorff vs. Hercules

This is Orndorff vs. Heenan Family, which went on forever and involved Orndorff hiring and firing Heenan twice. Orndorff is part of the House of Humperdink. Orndorff is a power guy but he’s using speed here because he’s also smart. Hercules gets in a shot to break up Paul’s momentum after he skins the cat. Paul did the skinning if that was unclear. A clothesline gets three twos.

We’re in Milwaukee if you care. The fans cheer for Paul but he can’t make much of a comeback. Off to the bearhug which is a power man staple of the late 80s. Actually the 80s in general. Bearhug is countered into a small package for Orndorff, getting two. Orndorff makes his comeback and hits the Piledriver (finisher) but Rude runs in for the DQ. This was Rude’s first feud as he had only been in the company about three months at this point.

Rating: D+. Not a bad match but it didn’t have the time to get going. Orndorff was WAY over at this time though and Heenan and his boys were hated so the crowd was very into things here. Orndorff would be retired for the first time very soon after this due to a very bad arm/neck injury he suffered when feuding with Hogan the year before. When you’re making somewhere between $10,000-20,000 a week though, you don’t bother taking time off for arm surgery.

Salvatore Bellomo vs. Bobby Heenan

This is from 1984 and there’s no story to it. Heenan just used to be a wrestler on occasion. Heenan bails to the apron of course because he’s Bobby Heenan. Bellomo beats on Heenan like he stole something and flips him in the corner. Heenan takes a bunch of dropkicks, including one sending him into the post. Heenan needs a doctor. Back in and Bobby takes even more of a beating.

Bobby actually takes over with a rake to the eyes and a lot of basic stuff. Then again, what are you expecting from Bobby Heenan the Wrestler? They collide and Heenan looks dead. Bellomo drives in some headbutts but Heenan pokes him in the eyes. Out to the floor and Heenan pops him as he comes back in. A guillotine puts Sal on the floor for the third time. Bellomo tries a sunset flip but Heenan punches him in the face, drops on top of him, AND GETS A CLEAN PIN.

Rating: A+. Bobby Heenan got a clean pin. Do you realize what it means for your career when you get pinned clean in Madison Square Garden by BOBBY HEENAN??? The match sucked but totally awesome for surprise value. This is on Heenan’s DVD.

Tito Santana vs. Killer Khan

This is from Houston and I don’t know this announcer either. Khan is a guy that is the walking definition of the monster foreign heel. He had a big feud with Andre which we’ll get to on one of these tapes and a quick feud with Hogan. One of the announcers is named Paul Boesch who ran Houston Wrestling forever. Apparently the other is Pete Doherty. Khan takes over with power to start of course.

We hear about an upcoming card in about three weeks which sounds a lot better than this one. We also hear about Ted DiBiase, who is actually A GOOD GUY here. Tito gets him in the position for what we would call Shattered Dreams. Some kicks to the thighs result in Khan going to the floor and a fan making fun of him. Tito controls as this is a very bad monster heel.

Off to a hammerlock and Khan looks like he’s about to cry. Khan finally gets something like a spinebuster and a middle rope punch. Tito channels his inner Kirk and beats up the KHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNN, knocking him to the apron and choking with the bottom rope. A running knee hits Khan but Tito gets picked up and crotched on the top rope….for a DQ? Different time I guess.

Rating: D. Another weak match but Khan’s best days were already behind him at this point. Nothing to see here and Khan was a really weak opponent here. Hearing about the Angry Mongolian and Boesch’s pronunciation of Tee-Toe was fun though. Still, bad match to end a very boring tape with.

Overall Rating: F+. Other than the fun Heenan match (which is only fun for the ending) and the opener which was just ok at best, there’s a whole lot of awful on this one. Absolutely terrible tape as they couldn’t have made a worse selection of matches. Nothing but cheap finishes that would have had any house show crowd rolling their eyes. Bad tape and certainly not worth seeing.

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Best of the WWF Volume 10
Host: Gene Okerlund
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Alfred Hayes, Gene Okerlund

It’s that time again, although I’m rapidly running out of these that I can find copies of. This is from late 86, which wasn’t a good time for the company. The one good thing on here is Piper returning and his feud with Adrian Adonis, which is old school Piper at his crazy best. The rest….eh I’ve been surprised before. Let’s get to it.

That Coliseum Video intro. I dig it.

Gene does the intro and you can see Wrestlemania 2 playing in the background. This isn’t looking good for us people.

Ricky Steamboat/Junkyard Dog/Haiti Kid vs. Jimmy Jack Funk/Hoss Funk/Jimmy Hart

Haiti Kid is a midget wrestler. Gorilla says it’ll be a classic and I don’t see myself agreeing. Jack (can’t call him Jimmy here) and Steamboat start us off. Ricky controls early and speeds things up. I think we’re in Boston here if you’re interested. Jimmy (for the sake of simplicity, when I say Jimmy I mean Hart) comes in and all three “good” guys swarm him. We then get a sequence which can only be described as a dog picking up a midget and throwing him at a man wearing a Lone Ranger mask.

Off to Hoss (Dory Jr.) vs. the Dog. Let the stalling begin. Steamboat comes in again and this is still completely one sided. He clears the ring again and we stall some more. Jack FINALLY gets some offense in to give him team a break. Hoss’ piledriver is countered into a backdrop as is his suplex into a suplex. Small package gets two for Ricky. Jack comes in and hammers away a bit. There’s not much of a point in listing off what happens here because it’s exactly what you would expect I’d presume.

Dragon finally gets in a chop to Hoss and brings in the Dog. He and Hoss go down and Jimmy and Haiti Kid remind us they’re alive by doing a quick and pointless chase. By quick, I mean about two seconds. Dog and Hoss move for about ten seconds so it’s time for a double clothesline. Dog needed a nap. Jack knocks Dog down so here’s Jimmy to a bit pop. Dog no sells it and Jimmy PANICS. The Kid comes in and everything breaks down. Dory hits Dog with the Megaphone and takes out the Kid so Jimmy can pin the tiny one.

Rating: D. When a manager and a midget get by far and away the biggest reactions of the match, you can kind of tell that something is wrong with your match. It was more or less a tag team match with interfering managers. That being said, it wasn’t a good tag match which really hurt things here. Boring match and REALLY long.

Tito Santana vs. Bob Orton

This is around the time when Orton is siding with Adrian Adonis so he’s even more hated since it was arguable that Adonis was the most hated heel in the company (not top heel, most hated. There’s a difference.). Gorilla says Tito has Excellence of Execution. We’re in Boston again here. They exchange basic stuff to start and hit the mat. Clipped to talking about Terry Garvin and that’s not going to go well.

Orton hits a hip toss and a slow flying headscissors. He misses a dive in the corner though and kind of crotches himself. Tito sends him to the floor because he’s not a nice person at times. Back in a jackknife cover gets two for Santana. This is shaping up to be LONG. Tito throwing on an armbar would seem to confirm my theory. Clipped again to later in the armbar so you know this is going to last awhile.

Orton gets up and just pounds him down as the fans boo. Backslide gets one for Tito and it’s back to the arm. As the fans’ eyes begin to close, Orton finally wakes them up a bit with an atomic drop. His shoulder hits the post though and so it’s back to the arm. Bob sends him to the floor to make this slow down even more. Santana gets thrown into a barricade and knocks it over.

Tito gets draped on the rope coming back in and Orton walks around even slower. And now we go to a chinlock. Grrrrrreat. Thankfully Tito atomic drops out of it and they both fall down. And then Bob grabs it right back. Tito punches him down and grabs the leg. He works it over a bit and here’s the Figure Four. After Orton gets the rope, Tito sets for the headknocker but takes a head to the balls (at least it’s a complete set) and Bob takes over again. They slug it out and the bell rings for a time limit draw. Apparently this ran 30 minutes.

Rating: D+. It’s ok but that’s just it: there’s nothing interesting here at all. They do a little bit of something and then they do a little bit of something else. They repeat this for the twenty minutes that we see of it. I don’t want to imagine what would have happened here if this was shown in full. What does this prove to anyone? That’s why you don’t see many of these that often. Also, this is proof that simply going 30 or 60 minutes as so many old guys claim to have done, doesn’t mean it’s any good.

The Machines vs. Big John Studd/King Kong Bundy

LONG story here that eventually helped set up Hogan vs. Andre. Giant Machine isn’t here though so there’s no point in listing it off. The Machines are Big Machine and Super Machine, or some combination of Axe from Demolition and Blackjack Lanza. Bundy hammers on let’s say Giant Machine. Heenan got run off early in the match and jumps in on commentary here.

While he rambles, Studd gets hammered down. Off to Bundy and Hayes thinks Studd is injured. He and Lanza collide and no one goes anywhere. Instead they hit each other and Bundy goes back into the corner. Avalanche misses and Team Heenan isn’t doing that well. Axe comes in (the announcers don’t know their names either) and pounds on Studd but gets blasted in the head to shift momentum.

Bundy and Studd collide in the corner and Heenan has to play peacemaker. Axe almost splashes Lanza but puts the brakes on. Studd pops him in the back of the head from the apron to shift momentum again. Studd goes for the mask but Lanza makes the save. Hot tag brings in Lanza and everything breaks down. Lanza hits a jumping back elbow for a very delayed two. Delayed because Heenan is late running in for the DQ so the referee basically just stops before the three.

Rating: D+. These matches were meant to be fun, but when you didn’t have the Giant in there it really hurt things. Not a good match or anything, but it wasn’t particularly meant to be. They did their thing here and the ending hut it a lot, but that doesn’t make it a good match. Still it’s old school fun though so I can’t complain much here.

Tag Titles: Dream Team vs. US Express

This is the Rotundo/Spivey version. The Dream Team has the tag titles but I don’t think they’re on the line here. Ok so they are. That works too. Rotundo gets beaten on by the champions but he speeds things up to get out of trouble. He gets his knees up in the corner and works over the arm. The good guys do the blind tag thing because faces in wrestling are usually evil. As Spivey gets beaten down the Dream Team tries the same thing and get thrown out. See? Heels aren’t heels because they’re evil. They’re heels because they get mistreated.

Rotunda vs. Valentine at the moment with Mike missing an elbow to give the champions the advantage. Valentine beats on him a bit until he gets caught in the Arn Anderson holding the arm down to the mat then jump crotch first onto the knees spot. Was that a Mid-Atlantic thing? Beefcake gets a sleeper on Mike but it gets countered pretty quickly. Greg breaks up the tag attempt and goes after the leg.

Now I know the Figure Four was a Mid-Atlantic thing. I’m still not sure on the crotching spot but you see it enough that it almost has to be. We finally get the hot tag when the Figure Four doesn’t work so it’s off to Spivey to clean house. For some reason the challengers tag twice after Spivey comes in. To no shock Rotundo got beaten up quickly so it was back to Spivey. The champs try to cheat but it can’t get the pin. Beefcake counters a rollup into a very sloppy looking one, grabs the furry boots (What is with those? So many people use them and I still don’t get the point) and gets the clean pin.

Rating: C-. The match was ok but I have no idea what the point was in having the challengers get beat that cleanly. It looked pretty bad as Spivey pretty clearly could have kicked out but didn’t. There was something a few seconds earlier though that looked a bit botched, so maybe that wasn’t the planned ending.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Billy Jack Haynes

Luscious John steals Jack’s hat so Beefcake can take an early advantage. I think we’re in MSG here. Brutus takes over due to the hat thing and uses his bare bones stuff to take over. At this point he was really boring and VERY limited. He also had the same style haircut as my cousin Sharon, which is a knock on him and not her. Haynes counters a suplex into one of his own and both guys are down.

This is one of those house show matches that is on a house show for a reason. There’s nothing interesting at all and the guys in there aren’t really all that interested in cranking things up past the bare minimum. Haynes gets a clothesline to take over again and my goodness END THIS ALREADY. He hits a splash to the knees but apparently it doesn’t hurt him as he covers for two anyway. And then Luscious John (Beefcake’s manager if that wasn’t clear) trips Haynes for the DQ.

Rating: D-. I liked Beefcake when I was a kid but MAN was this boring. They weren’t interesting at all and the fans weren’t really interested either. Neither guy was anything of note and they were only there to fill in about ten minutes on the card. At least it’s over though and we have to move on to something better right?

Islanders vs. Jimmy Jack Funk/Mr. X

Seriously, THIS IS THE BEST OF THE WWF??? This is the Islanders’ debut. We also have a female referee. X vs. Tama to start us off. Tama runs him off and it’s Funk in now. Ok back to X and Haku. The Islanders are faces here due to not being in the Heenan Family yet. Backbreaker gets two for Haku and this referee counts slow. Back to Tama vs. Funk and they mess up a backdrop as Funk stops, then gets backdropped.

Funk hits Tama in the back while he’s hitting the ropes to take over. This is already boring me, which is the running theme of this tape and arguably this series. Tama gets beaten down for awhile as this match is going WAY too long for a debut. Jack hits a shoulder breaker and middle rope fist drop for two. It was nice of Tama to scoot closer to the ropes for Jack to hit him.

Tama finally escapes a neckbreaker into a snap (minus the snap) suplex to put both guys down. Oh come on just get to the tag so we can get to end of this already. They tag but the referee doesn’t see it. I love that but NOT IN TEN MINUTE DEBUTS! Tama ducks a clothesline and then a double clothesline puts both guys down. FINALLY Haku gets the tag and cleans house before bringing Tama back in for a splash RVD would be jealous of for the pin after nearly 13 minutes.

Rating: D. This was their debut. If you want a team to be impressive in their debut, you make it a squash. You don’t make it a match that lasted longer than most main events would go. They beat up jobbers in their debut, but the WWF managed to screw this up. How could they manage to do that???

Roddy Piper vs. AJ Petrucci

AJ is a jobber who looks like a combination of Tugboat and Akeem but even less memorable. This is Piper’s big return and MAN is he over. This is from Superstars. AJ slaps him so Piper puts one hand behind his back for the rest of the match and beats the tar out of him. This is the crazy fired up Piper that is just AWESOME. This is awesome stuff with Piper giving him a brutal beating with all kinds of strikes and never taking his arm from behind his back except for at the end for a double axe to the face to end it. Total squash but AWESOME.

Now we get to the BIG angle of this time. Piper had left for awhile, I think to film some movies, and comes back to host the Pit. But the Pit is gone and Adrian Adonis has his own show called The Flower Shop. He also has Bob Orton, Piper’s former bodyguard, in a pink hat as the new bodyguard. They break Piper’s leg with a chair so Piper limps out (in wrestling trunks for some reason) and DESTROYS the Flower Shop with a ball bat. Adonis jumped Piper on the set of the Pit and put him to sleep. Then Piper ran in on an Adonis match and the locker room had to empty to break them up.

Roddy Piper vs. Don Muraco

Muraco is an Adonis crony. Piper jumps him to start and he’s WAY over. He was easily the second most popular guy in the company at this point. Muraco has a beard here which doesn’t work on him at all. They go to the floor and Piper slams him into a chair. Piper bites him coming back in and then gets him tied up in the ropes.

There’s a bulldog for no cover. There are cops walking around in the front row for some reason. Muraco sends him to the floor and Fuji gets in a shot to take Piper down a few pegs. Piper gets sent into the post and is busted. I can’t actually see it but Gorilla said it and Gorilla wouldn’t lie. Back in now and Piper spears him down to take over. Oh yeah it’s dripping off his face. Muraco is busted too.

This is a total brawl now. Muraco swings away but you don’t do that to Piper. He takes over with punches and hits a suplex for two. Fuji pokes Piper with the cane to shift momentum one more time. They’re both bleeding a ton. Fuji tries to interfere again but Muraco accidentally knees him to the floor and Piper rolls up Muraco for the pin.

Rating: B-. Fun brawl here which is what Piper was best at. He could go out there and have a totally wild brawl but his charisma was more than enough to carry him to a good match. Well maybe fun is the better term that good but you get the idea. This of course all culminated with the hair vs. hair match at Mania with Piper vs. Adonis.

Overall Rating: D. This was a pretty dull tape and a lot of that is due to a combination of match selection and the era in which its set. This was a bad time for the WWF as other than the main event which had Orndorff vs. Hogan (not mentioned here) there wasn’t much going on. The midcard was dominated by Savage and Steamboat was out injured or was about to be. Weak tape.

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Best of the WWF Volume 7
Host: Gene Okerlund
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura, Vince McMahon

We’re back to this again and this is the second time I’ve had to do the first half because I screwed something up and I’m an idiot. Anyway this is from mid 86 which isn’t a good time for the WWF other than this new guy named Savage who is kind of awesome. Other than that there isn’t much to it. Let’s get to it.

Dig that Coliseum Video opening! And yes I know I say that every time but it’s still awesome.

Gene welcomes us to the tape and runs down the card.

Pedro Morales vs. Terry Funk

We’re in Boston here in I’d guess early 86. Gene tells us about Morales holding what we would now call the Triple Crown. Morales is at the end of his career here but he was still big enough of a draw to be brought into the big New England crowds. Morales hammers away and Funk is all messed up early on. Then again he might just be Terry Funk. Funk comes back in and throws Pedro onto the announce table.

Morales may have injured a hamstring on the fall. Funk hammers him in the head and does a little Ali Shuffle. He keeps peppering Morales and they go out onto the table again. Funk actually pulls the headset off of Gorilla who implies a showdown later on. That could actually be worth seeing. Or maybe that was Jimmy Hart. Pedro goes shoulder first into the post and this has been totally one sided so far.

Funk pulls some tape out of his tights and chokes away. Morales gets it though and here comes the firey Latin temper that he was famous for. He knocks Terry around as Jimmy is freaking out on the floor. Funk gets knocked to the floor and the steps get turned over. He goes head first into them and hides under them like a true cowardly heel. Pedro teases jumping off the top but settles for drilling Funk upside the head. Funk does a perfect Flair Flop off the apron to the floor.

I don’t think I’ve seen anything other than punches in this match so far and that’s made it awesome. Funk is all over the place, looking either drunk or old. In other words, he’s perfectly fine. Back to the floor again and Terry finds a wooden chair under the ring but it doesn’t get used. Instead Pedro punches him some more and kicks him in the back. Funk gets his trunks pulled down and that’s an image I really didn’t need to see twice in one night. Jimmy slips Funk the Megaphone and a shot to the head ends this.

Rating: B-. This was a great old school brawl from two great old school brawlers. Funny how something like that works isn’t it? Pedro was more or less done after this and it’s not like Funk ever did much in his run in the WWF. At least after this he went back to the NWA where he was much more successful.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

This was the hottest feud on the planet back then and Savage jumps him as soon as Hogan hits the ring. He destroys Hogan for about three minutes with the robe and shades still on. And that is why Randy Savage is better than you: he can make a robe, sunglasses and purple underwear look awesome. A bunch of belt shots, including one off the top are all cool with the referee.

Liz gets on the apron for dramatic convenience and Hogan takes over with his big rights. Now he has the shades on and he chokes away with the headband. We head to the floor and Savage goes into the post, busting him open badly. Hulk peppers him with some shots to the open cut. What a strategic American hero.

We get our first non-punch move of the match: a choke by Hogan. The fans are WAY into this as Liz gets up on the apron again. Savage gets a shot in and sends Hogan to the floor. There’s the double axe to the outside and another one on the inside for two. Savage goes up and there’s the big elbow, but Hogan does the superhero kickout at one. It’s Hulk Up time and I think you know where this is going.

Hogan goes off on him and there is blood everywhere. There’s the big boot and Savage keeps trying to run. Back to the floor and Hogan sets to ram him into the post but Liz stops him. Savage gets down and rams Hogan into the post. We have a bell for some reason and I guess we’re done? There are spots of blood on Hogan’s trunks.

Rating: B. This is one of those matches where there wasn’t any kind of a story to it and it was just a big brawl from bell to bell. Due to that, the fans LOVED this and never stopped freaking out the entire time. These two did this same match almost every night on the house shows and it never stopped working. Once they teamed up in 88 they were almost unstoppable and it’s why the matches they had after they Exploded were so awesome.

Post match Hogan goes nuts, throwing on a bear hug. It takes a bunch of the roster to break it up. It’s cool to see that from Hogan (who is getting cheered harder than almost anyone else I’ve ever heard in the Garden) who rarely shows much anger. It’s a countout win for Savage if you’re interested, which was Hogan’s second straight loss to Savage in MSG. There’s huge heat on Savage being announced as the winner.

Lou Albano vs. Arnold Skaaland

This is a battle of the managers from 77, which I believe was a HUGE feud if I remember right. They’re both old but the fans are all over this. Skaaland drills him after the bell and Albano almost immediately runs. I think I’ve seen this before. I mean before I erased the review earlier tonight. Albano goes old school on the heel style with a foreign object that isn’t really there. Do that about four or five times and you’re going to need a police escort out of the place, at least back in the day.

The beating goes on for awhile and it’s more or less all Albano just popping him in the head with the object. Seriously that’s all the match is but if I know my MSG crowds, the pop for the comeback is going to be oh yeah there it is. Skaaland gets the object and drills Albano with it a few times to blow the roof off the place. Albano bails and it’s a countout win for Arnold.

Rating: B-. I know that’s way too high for four and a half minutes of nothing but punches, but dang the fans ate this up. They’re two old managers but that’s all this needed to be: a beating by Albano and then a big comeback win for Skaaland, which is all the fans wanted to see. This is a walking definition of less being more.

Tag Titles: Toru Tanaka/Mr. Fuji vs. Haystacks Calhoun/Tony Garea

The non-Japanese guys are champions here. This is a rematch from when the country boy and Garea, the guy from New Zealand won the titles earlier in the year. It’s also 2/3 falls. Calhoun is about 600lbs and was the biggest guy in the company’s history until some French giant arrived. Tanaka throws the salt that is always thrown by Japanese guys for some reason and some little old ladies keep sweeping it up. Ok then.

We’re almost immediately clipped to Garea and Tanaka starting us off. Garea hooks a headlock and is really bland looking while doing so. Calhoun is really happy and jolly. He’s a hillbilly character the size of Yokozuna if that gives you a visual. He comes in too celebrate because his partner hooks a chinlock. See what I’m dealing with here? The heels cheat to take over and it’s off to Fuji. It’s so weird to see him in shape.

Garea fights back, hitting what Tito Santana used called a head knocker. Clipped again to Garea backdropping Tanaka and it’s off to the fat man. He does a few comedy spots but also some simple ones like sitting on Tanaka’s chest instead of dropping onto him. The second time he does it, Garea stands on Haystacks’ back. Calhoun takes some salt to the eye but he gets out easily. A few shoulders get two on Tanaka. And there’s a spin kick to the stomach for the first fall for Tanaka.

Clipped to the start of the second fall with Tony pounding away on Tanaka some more. He hooks a front facelock which is ruled a choke in a rare thing to see for a face’s move. We get the most obvious clipping I’ve ever seen as all of a sudden Fuji is in the hold instead of Tanaka. I know they’re sneaky but come on now. Everything breaks down and the heels double team Calhoun enough for a DQ to tie things up.

Third fall begins with Calhoun all messed up but that’s normal for him as he was always kind of played up as a simpleton. Garea starts of course and Tanaka wants a handshake. They do some lame brawling and Garea hammers away even more. Off to the country boy again and the big splash keeps the titles on Calhoun and Garea.

Rating: D+. This was really pretty boring. I’ve seen some old school matches that are good but this was nothing to see at all. Calhoun was a big old school draw but he didn’t do much for me. The match was nothing to see and was mainly Garea doing the whole thing and boring me to death the entire time. The Japanese team would get the titles back later in the year.

Calhoun splashes Tanaka again because he can.

This next one is from Showdown at Shea so it’s pasting time. Monsoon does commentary on the tape but I’m not watching this again.

Intercontinental Title: Ken Patera vs. Tony Atlas

This is pre-jail for Patera so he’s blonde and still kind of awesome. Atlas is Mr. USA and a generic strongman. Surprisingly good reaction for Atlas. This sums up Patera very well: before Mark Henry, there was Ken Patera. Just with a lower level of suck that is. Atlas is RIPPED with a body that makes John Cena look like Yokozuna. He throws Patera through the ropes on a kickout. Keep in mind Patera weighs about 270.

Foley goes into this insane story about how he remembers the Atlas/Johnson title win and how a strange set of circumstances that night led to him being world champion. Cole is ON IT tonight, talking about how the guys are doing everything in much more dramatic fashion because there’s no video or anything like that so the view you have from the stands is all you have. That’s something I wouldn’t have thought of but it’s very true.

We then get something I’d bet you will hear on a maximum of three other WWE produced shows ever: Foley says a lot of the matches aren’t that good. How many times can you remember someone that flat out saying a show has been bad for the most part? Vince would call the worst matches ever “extraordinary” or something like that while Foley is sitting here saying this show hasn’t been very good. He’s absolutely right which is very nice to hear for a change, especially from someone that knows what it’s like to be out there.

Full nelson goes on but Atlas gets the ropes. The announcers don’t talk about the matches at all and are just telling stories about how their memories of these guys which is really fun to hear. It’s nice to hear guys that love this stuff just sit around and talk about wrestling rather than put things over. We get an interesting issue as the fans chant USA for Mr. USA Tony Atlas. Keep in mind Patera was a legitimate Olympian.

Cross body gets two for Atlas as Cole runs down the history of Shea Stadium. We hit the floor for some brawling and Patera is in trouble. This is a big brawl for the most part and we get a bell as Patera stays outside too long. Foley calls the finish unsatisfying. Atlas gets on the mic and wants more but the champion runs.

Rating: C-. Not very good but fun. Power vs. power is easy to do and this worked fine. Both guys oversold everything which is the idea here and it worked rather well. Not great or anything but fun which is what the idea is supposed to be here. Atlas was pretty decent actually.

Now we get to one of the theme parts of the tape: The Slammies! This was for the original broadcast, which is so far beyond campy it reaches the city again. Gene goes up to some fans and annoys them. All he does is ask who is winning tonight, without asking about categories or nominees. This goes on way too long and he doesn’t seem to stop asking decent looking women. One guy wisely walks away from him. I really hope these guys are plants. This is in Baltimore. The only interesting thing here: Gene says the words jabrino and kayfabe. This goes on WAY too long.

Jesse talks to Piper while Piper is in the bathroom.

Now we get to the main part of the awards. Vince and Gorilla are hosting and Gorilla has to zip up. The first award is for Most Ignominious and it was voted up by the WWF Academy of Arts and Sciences. The winner (and only nominee) is Nikolai Volkoff. Sheik and Volkoff (in wrestling gear and a cheap suit respectively) come out to accept the award but Sheik falls on his face. Volkoff thinks it’s a singing award. He doesn’t know what ignominious means and when he finds out he isn’t pleased. Nikolai says he shouldn’t be the Most Ignominious. He should be the SECOND Most Ignominious.

Roddy Piper wins the award for best performance in the Land of 1000 Dances video. He has what appears to be a broom with him for some reason. The trophy breaks as soon as he picks it up. He says that’s typical of MTV: Music to Vomit by. Oh that Roddy. He’s so crazy. Like MTV has anything to do with music.

Hart Foundation vs. British Bulldogs

If this isn’t awesome, they’re having an off night. Bret and Dynamite start us off and things are in high gear already. Bret bails and we’re clipped. YOU AIR TEN MINUTES OF GENE ASKING STUPID QUESTIONS AND YOU CLIP THIS??? Bret gets sent outside again and it’s off to Davey. It’s power vs. power now as Anvil comes in. They trade slams and Davey does it with just one arm. Show-off.

Davey makes Anvil look stupid (a far stretch to be sure) and it’s off to Bret. The Harts take over on Davey and work him over in their corner. This is Foundation 101 and to be fair it’s 80s tagging 101. They’re in the black and blue which I always like a little better than the pink. Smith gets the tag to Dynamite but Bret pops him in the back as he’s hitting the ropes. Now the REAL beating begins. Anvil sends him to the floor where Bret slams him on the concrete.

The heels do some old school cheating like switching without tagging and other such nefarious means. Dynamite takes the Bret chest first to the buckle bump. The Harts work over the ribs and back for the most part. There’s some heel miscommunication as Bret holds Dynamite’s arms back but Anvil has a boot up in the corner to ram Dynamite’s head into. You don’t often see that from the Harts.

Davey finally freaks out and chases Bret around the ring which just allows choking by Anvil. They continue the tag cheating ways by having Dynamite make the tag but Bret distracts to keep the tag from counting. I love stuff like that. Dynamite tries to spin out of a backbreaker like a tilt-a-whirl but I think they botch it to a degree. Backslide gets two for the Kid.

Dynamite gets tied up in the ropes but escapes just in time to avoid a flying Hitman who crashes into the ropes. Hot tag FINALLY brings in Davey to clean house. There’s the press slam to Bret. The numbers catch up with him and he takes a Hart Attack. Bret covers him, only to have Dynamite fly off the top with a swan dive (he was Benoit’s idol) and makes the illegal pin.

Rating: B. Oh come on it’s the Bulldogs vs. the Harts. This would be good if none of them had any limbs on their bodies. This is probably the best pairing of any WWF teams in this era, and when you consider how totally stacked the division was in this era, I can’t really think of any higher praise.

Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Moon Dogs

The lighting is horrible here so I’m assuming this is in a non-American city. I’m right as it’s from an unnamed city in Australia. The Rougeaus are brand new here. This incarnation of the Moon Dogs are Rex and Spot, probably the most successful pair. The Rougeaus take turns beating up on Rex, who is returning it seems. The brothers aren’t even in matching tights so this must be very early in their run in the company. Further research says this is their first month there.

Spot comes in but the beard doesn’t work its usual magic as he’s rolled up for two. We’re in Sydney if you’re particularly interested. According to Hayes this is the Rougeaus’ debut. The newcomers work over Spot but we’re clipped to him holding Raymond in a bearhug. Hot tag brings in Jacques who cleans house and hits a cross body for the pin on Rex.

Rating: C-. Pretty much a nothing tag match here but that wasn’t the point. This was the team’s debut and they needed a win over an established team to get anywhere. Also it’s just a house show match for a country that didn’t get much mainstream wrestling, so it’s not like this was supposed to be anything of note.

Dream Team vs. Iron Sheik vs. Nikolai Volkoff

Both teams here have lost the tag titles at Mania so they have that in common. Also this is the rare heel vs. heel pairing. This might be in Philly but I’m not 100% sure. Oh ok this is before Mania 2 so the Dream Team (Beefcake/Valentine) are the champions. Off to Beefcake who gets caught in the other evil corner. Nikolai hammers away on him and wins a brief power struggle.

I think the champs are the de facto faces here. Valentine has a little bit better luck against the Russian so it’s off to Sheik. He hooks an abdominal stretch and Gorilla still finds something to complain about with it. The Sheik goes aerial with a dropkick of all things and gets two. Brutus gets the tag and this match is boring me to death. The not yet Barber misses a middle rope fist to Volkoff and it’s time for a bearhug to waste more time. Camel Clutch by Sheik is broken up and Valentine comes in, as does everyone else. And there’s the lame double DQ. At least it’s over.

Rating: D-. This was one of the lamest matches I’ve seen in years. Just boring all around and the whole thing didn’t work at all. The Dream Team was straight up boring but would be together until Mania 3 because the fans hadn’t suffered enough I guess. Just a horrible match and terribly boring.

Overall Rating: B-. The last match really drains this because aside from that, I really didn’t have anything to complain about. Everything works really well and you get an hour and a half of great stuff until the last match on the tape just kills this thing deader than Coliseum Video. If they had put Hogan vs. Savage on last, this goes WAY up in value. Still good stuff though, which is rare in this series.

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Best of the WWF Volume 18
Host: Sean Mooney
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan, Sean Mooney, Alfred Hayes

It’s another of these things and by the laws of science, wrestling and nature, it HAS to be better than Volume 16. After this one we’re going to be halfway through this series so at least we’re getting close to it being done. This is from late 1988/very early 1989, meaning I’ll enjoy it if nothing else. Let’s get to it.

Sean runs down the card for the tape.

Women’s Title: Rockin Robin vs. Sensational Sherri

This is in Paris and Sherri is champion. Sherri jumps her but Robin is a bit too fast for her. A jumping back elbow gets two as Gorilla and Brain talk about this being day #29 since Sherri defended the title. The spotlights are really bright and distracting. Gorilla and Bobby have a dinner bet on this match. Robin is totally dominant so far and gets two off a cross body. These girls at least know what they’re doing.

Robin really likes using a headlock. I mean she really likes it, as in I think she’s used about five in the first few minutes of it. Gorilla and Brain have such basic conversations and they’re just great. I’m fine with that when there’s nothing of note going on (front facelock here) but when Cole does it during a promo or a fast paced match, it’s stupid.

Sherri gets her first move, a full nelson, after about six minutes. It lasts all of ten seconds until Robin reverses to one of her own. Sherri finally takes over and again it lasts a few seconds as she gets rammed into the corner. Sherri gets rammed into more buckles and a jumping clothesline gets two. After nearly ten minutes, Sherri hits her in the ribs to take over. Her offense is really weak, similar to how most modern Divas wrestle.

Robin slams her off the top but she can’t follow up immediately. Cross body gets two. MAN Robin throws a hard chop. Sherri misses a spinning cross body and Robin gets two. Sherri avoids a dropkick but gets caught by a sunset flip for two. Sherri puts her on top for I’m guessing a superplex but Robin jumps off with a middle rope bulldog for the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. This was FAR better than I was expecting. Robin was actually pretty good and I was getting into this. It’s amazing what happens when the girls are actually having a wrestling match instead of trying to be all cute and show off how great they are. In other words, have wrestlers instead of models.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Jacques Rougeau

What an odd choice for a match, but WE GET HEEL ROUGEAU MUSIC!!!!!! Beefcake’s music is pretty awesome too. From what I can tell this is at a Superstars taping in Daytona Beach, Florida. Jacques keeps breaking cleanly to prove he’s a nice guy. He takes over quickly with a nice dropkick and Brutus is all confused. Thank goodness he’s fine.

A high knee puts Jacques on the floor and it’s time for hugs. Gay jokes abound from Mooney. Back inside (no pun intended) and Jacques takes over, hooking a camel clutch. The fans are all over Jimmy here. There’s a Boston Crab which is like a fetish for French Canadians. Jimmy shows off his value, hitting Brutus in the ribs with the megaphone while he’s on the floor.

He stays on the back and ribs, even hooking the abdominal stretch. Hayes complains about it since Gorilla isn’t on commentary here. Brutus ducks a cross body and the fans pop big. Very hot crowd here. There’s an atomic drop and Jacques sells it as it’s meant to be sold. Beefcake tries a splash (odd) but catches knees. Jacques is sent into his manager and the sleeper looks to end this, but Ray Rougeau runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C. Generic but fine here. Brutus was never in any real danger but I don’t get the ending. Why do they need to keep Jacques, a tag wrestler, from losing clean? Brutus was a solid midcard guy at this point and got a lot better around this point. Not a great match or anything, but for a TV main event this would have been fine.

Brain Busters vs. Young Stallions

In Toronto here I think. You could always tell as the camera was always off to the side a bit. There’s no Heenan here, although Gorilla says he might be in the upper deck in drag. That wouldn’t shock me actually. Arn and I think Powers start us off here and it’s a big brawl, won by the Stallions. Back to Tully vs. Powers and Blanchard isn’t sure what to do with him. Nice dropkick by Roma puts him down.

Off to Anderson who should be in the Hall of Fame. Roma (a future Horseman for some reason) snaps off some dropkicks and the Stallions rule the ring again. Blanchard tries to speed things up and that goes as well as anything else he’s tried. The Stallions work on Tully’s leg as this has been one sided so far. Anderson finally realizes he’s a Horseman and comes in with some double teaming to take over.

There’s a spinebuster which didn’t have a name yet. Roma gets beaten down like he’s a glorified jobber and Gorilla complains about the lack of perfection in the abdominal stretch. We get into a standard tag match with Roma being beaten down for awhile. Arn does his “test of strength on the mat and jump onto the other guys’ feet to crotch myself” spot. Blanchard gets taken down also and there’s the double tag. Everything breaks down and during the insanity, Tully cheats (atta boy!) and gets an illegal pin via a sunset flip on Powers.

Rating: C+. Fine match here and the 80s style never fails. It’s not a great match or anything but for a house show match that got about 12 minutes, it’s hard to complain about something like this. The Busters would get the titles later that year and would hold them until Tully got a little bit too high one day.

Here’s the Brother Love Show with Slick as the guest. This is from SNME 18 so I’m going to cut and paste as per usual. The guest is Hogan. Love always scared me to death back in the day. He was just freaky looking. Instead of Hogan he brings out Slick. Hogan is MAD and overacts beyond belief. We get to hear Jive Soul Bro as a consolation prize, making this show substantially better. Ah here’s Hulk. Nothing Love says means anything here as we’re just waiting on Boss Man to come in.

Love asks Hogan questions but keeps cutting him off before he can answer over and over again. He lets Slick answer because something tells me he’s not a nice person. Slick is as tall as Hogan. Never would have guessed that. The look on Hogan’s face is great actually as he’s not used to BLATANT DISRESPECT like this. Finally Hogan just grabs the mic and yells a lot.

Hogan talks about how fake Love is. This is going absolutely nowhere and I’m bored out of my mine. Hulk talks about being a judge and sentencing Love for something or other. He finally beats up Slick and Love. No Boss Man or anything which makes this a HUGE waste of time. Love gets handcuffed somewhere in there. Moving on.

The next match and angle are from SNME 17 so I’m going to cut and paste again. The angle that happened after the match is on the tape also.

We recap Roberts vs. Rude. The idea is that Rude had a gimmick going of giving a woman a kiss after his matches. He picked a woman in the front row and she declined. She said her husband was a pro wrestler. His name is Jake Roberts. Rude started wearing tights with Cheryl’s face on the crotch. Jake literally ripped them off of him and it was censored. In reality he was wearing a thong but you get the idea.

Rude says he’s never embarrassed of his body. Heenan talks about snake charmers hypnotizing snakes and hypnotizes Gene until Rude shouts RUDE AWAKENING. Funny.

Jake and his wife say really generic stuff.

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Rude

What a natural paring this is. No theme music for Jake yet. Rude is wearing those tights again. Jake goes for the tights nearly immediately. Is Cheryl not satisfying him? I’ve watched nearly six minutes of this match and there’s just nothing to say about it. Cheryl gets thrown out for slapping Rude. Vince saying that she shouldn’t be because it didn’t hurt him is very funny for some reason.

Jesse goes on a rant about Vince playing favorites and it’s just freaking boring. I don’t know why but this just isn’t interesting at all. It’s not bad or anything. It’s just not getting my attention at all. Rude dominates for the most part with Jake just punching and looking for the DDT. Rude Awakening is blocked. Jake totally fakes him out by pulling back a punch and there’s the DDT. Instead of the cover though he goes for the tights.

Heenan comes in for the DQ. And here’s Andre, who would beat RVD in any match they had I think should be mentioned, to beat Jake up. Jake gets the snake out and since Andre is a heel, he’s terrified of it. The look on Andre’s face is priceless. Jake throws the snake at him in a smart move. Andre then has a heart attack. WOW.

Rating: D+. Not bad, but just not that interesting really at all. They would have what I guess was supposed to be the other big match at Mania 5 but this was just not a very good match. Oh yeah Rude was involved here. Yeah I couldn’t really care less. Match was ok though.

Here’s a brief profile on the Bushwhackers who are brand new. Gene talks to them and they praise the USA and talk about pushing buttons. They get a 7up and Luke uses his teeth to open it. I mean he takes the teeth out and uses them as a wedge.

Another skit (same clothes) shows them eating a lot and generally being disgusting.

Gene goes to the woods to meet them for the third time and they pop out from under a pile of leaves. It’s camouflage training or something.

WWF World Title: Ted DiBiase vs. Randy Savage

Oh yeah. This is on Savage’s DVD. I love that Fink has to tell us that it’s a cage match, WHEN THE BIG FREAKING CAGE IS AROUND THE RING ALREADY. I know fans are viewed as stupid but come on now. This is escape only and we’re in MSG so the crowd is white hot. DiBiase jumps him as soon as the bell rings. He misses a knee drop though and they slug it out from their knees. This is looking more like a fight than a match which is always cool when you have the talent to pull it off.

DiBiase beats him down and goes up the cage but Savage makes the save. The crowd is way into this already. Savage blocks a shot into the cage, I think. Actually maybe he did because he’s down already. Ted runs again but Savage makes another save. DiBiase gets his feet caught in the ropes coming down so Savage goes up, only to get caught by Virgil to put him back into the cage.

Randy sends him into the cage and goes up but gets punched by Virgil again. They’re doing a lot of “one guy goes up, the other guys saves, then reverse it”, which is great for building drama. Liz asked Superstar Billy Graham earlier today for some advice. “My advice is to gain about 50 pounds so you’ll look better.” That man is an idiot! DiBiase goes for the door but Savage makes the save. Then reverse that order and they do it again.

Both guys go up on opposite sides of the cage but Virgil makes the save. DiBiase jumps down for absolutely no apparent reason and stomps on Savage some more. A suplex is countered by Savage and he goes for the door but Virgil slams the cage on his head to break it up again. Graham goes on another rant about how Liz needs to gain weight to help her man. Savage makes another save as DiBiase goes for the door. He goes off on DiBiase as Virgil climbs up again. A fan climbs the cage to help Savage but Randy rams the heels’ heads together and climbs down to retain.

Rating: B. Solid old school style cage match here with the whole thing being based around drama and near escapes. Graham being an idiot got old fast, with him wanting the premiere sex symbol of wrestling ever up to that point to put on 50 pounds of muscle. Seriously, he said that. Anyway, fun match with lots of drama and DiBiase as the most evil thing around makes for a good main event.

Overall Rating: B+. I really enjoyed this. I don’t know if it was just that I’m a big fan of this era, but this was a really enjoyable 90 minutes of wrestling. It was one of those things you would see at a video store for like eight dollars or so and on that note, you can’t complain at all about it. Good stuff with a good main event is all you can ask for from these and it’s a great way to escape the horrors of Volume 16. Good stuff.

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