Monday Night Raw – June 13, 2016: Someone Give Me A Good Title For A Strong Go Home Show

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 13, 2016
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Money in the Bank so it’s hard to say how much will actually happen this week. In this case we’ll have the buildup to the actual ladder match but one of the participants will be crossing over to the main event as well as Dean Ambrose hosts a special Ambrose Asylum with Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We have a moment of silence for Orlando.

Here’s New Day to get things going. During their entrance we see a sign in the crowd reading “The guy behind me can’t see.” That actually made me groan and furthers my loathing of most wrestling fans. They talk about the upcoming four way but stop to make fun of Kofi for wearing the new Steph Curry shoes, which apparently look old. Kofi: “These shoes are hot on the streets!” Woods: “What streets? The streets of Greenwich, Connecticut?” Kofi: “Those are some mean streets.” They promise to keep the titles but here are Enzo and Big Cass to interrupt.

Cass says they’re going all in on Sunday and walking out with the titles. He implies that the unicorn horns are made for her pleasure and asks if Kofi is serious with the Jerry Seinfeld shoes. After New Day makes fun of the shoes as well, Cass wants to talk about Francesca. Woods: “That’s my girl.” Cass: “Well where was your girl last night?” Apparently she was with Enzo, who had his lips all over her like Satchmo.

Woods gets very serious and says he’s the only one who blows his girl. Kofi introduces the verbal joust of wits between New Day and Enzo/Big Cass but the Vaudevillains interrupt. English sings about how the new era but Anderson and Gallows cut them off. Gallows makes fun of the New Orleans Saints so Cass calls them S-A-W-F-T.

New Day/Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. The Club/Vaudevillains

This is joined in progress with Kofi working over Gotch before bringing in Big E. for the Unicorn Stampede. Cass throws in some elbows before Enzo tags himself in so Cass can throw him at Gotch. English shoves Gotch out of the way of a high cross body, only to have Gotch run Amore over. It’s time for Enzo to take a beating as all of the villains take a shot at him. English gets kicked out to the floor though and a kick to the chest is enough for the hot tag off to Cass as everything breaks down. Kofi dives on everyone and we take a break.

Back with Big E. in trouble but countering a sunset flip and dropping Gotch with an elbow to the jaw. Gallows gets in a clothesline though and Big E. is in trouble again. The Vaudevillains chop away before it’s off to Karl for a kick to the face in the corner. Big E. gets in a shot to the ribs though and it’s off to Kofi as things speed up again. A high cross body gets two on Anderson as Enzo and Gotch are sent out to the floor. English does the same to Cass, only to have Big E. LAUNCH him with a belly to belly. Gallows comes in off a blind tag and the Magic Killer puts Kingston away at 13:26.

Rating: C+. That break in the middle hurt this a lot as it felt like nothing more than a way to fill in time rather than something that the match actually needed. That being said, Kofi was on fire here, which is why he just had to take the pin. Big E. or Enzo were available, though they were smart to keep Cass looking strong as he’s possibly the biggest prospect in the whole match.

We look back at the debut of the Shield at Survivor Series 2012 to help set up the Ambrose Asylum later tonight.

Bob Backlund/Darren Young segment from Smackdown with Backlund telling him to save money, including only having one pair of clothes.

Shane and Stephanie are bickering over who should run Raw and/or Smackdown when Kane comes in to offer his services. He has a resume and a letter of recommendation from Undertaker so Stephanie lets Shane handle this one.

Zack Ryder is laughing with some random people about Apollo Crews knocking Sheamus down on Smackdown. Sheamus comes in and says he’ll beat Ryder up tonight, just like he’ll do to Crews on Sunday. Ryder says hi to Crews…..who isn’t there, allowing Ryder to run away like any former United States and Intercontinental Champion would do.

Clip of Shield’s face turn.

The Shining Stars brag about Puerto Rico’s water. How is this supposed to make money?

Titus O’Neil comes out for a match but Rusev jumps him from behind and beats him down on the stage. The referees have to come out and break the Accolade.

Clip of Shield breaking up. So to recap: they arrived, they turned face, and they split with nothing in between.

It’s time for the Ambrose Asylum with special guests Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins. Before they come out though, Ambrose says he feels like he’s just woken up from a coma because this Sunday feels like Wrestlemania. There are two major matches and we’re focusing on one of them here. Therefore, let’s bring out his first guest, the scum of the Earth, Seth Rollins.

Reigns is brought out as well and we get the big visual of the three of them standing there. Ambrose: “This is great huh?” He asks Rollins about the knee and Rollins is stunned that Ambrose hasn’t watched his special on the WWE Network (he should because it’s awesome). Dean thinks Seth’s face must be hurt because it’s killing him. Reigns on the other hand had a great time on Bourbon Street last night.

Dean wants Rollins to calm down and stop being a party pooper. After the party pooper chant dies off, Rollins lists off some fun moments they’ve had like Wrestlemania XXX, flying in on a helicopter to fight Undertaker and HELL NO in London and finding Dean unconscious next to a dumpster in…..what town was that? Seth brings up the matches against Evolution and we get a BLUETISTA chant.

Rollins gets to the Wrestlemania XXXI cash-in and violence starts boiling over. Dean breaks it up and says Reigns beat Ambrose for that title in the first place. Yeah Reigns accomplished a lot in Rollins’ absence but he’s never beaten Seth one on one. Rollins rants about how he’s going to get the title back on his own but Dean laughs the idea off. Reigns actually says Rollins is right because it’s going to be one on one Sunday and then they’ll call him the guy because he beat Seth. Dean asks the fans which one it’s going to be but offers a third option: he wins the Money in the Bank contract and cashes in on either of them.

The music plays and the brawl is on with Reigns throwing Dean away so he can beat Seth up himself. That earns Seth a Superman Punch but Dean gives Reigns Dirty Deeds because that’s what friends do to each other. Ambrose looks up at the briefcase and the fans seem to like the idea.

Back from a break and Stephanie makes Ambrose vs. Jericho for the main event. Over the weekend I made a comment about how Smackdown is worthless because the matches mean nothing and there’s a good chance that they’ll just repeat a match on Monday anyway and I had a feeling it would be this one because it’s the one that didn’t need to happen again.

Paige vs. Charlotte

Natalya and Becky Lynch are at ringside. Non-title and the second match of the show starts an hour and twenty one minutes in. Paige runs her over with a knee to start but gets small packaged for two. Charlotte yells at Natalya and walks into the Rampaige for the pin at 2:31. I’m not even going to bother getting mad about this.

Cesaro is about to talk about Money in the Bank when Sami Zayn comes in to give the real answers. Cesaro is ticked off and says Sami is acting like a child but Sami says Cesaro can’t talk down to him like this. Apparently they’re in the same match tonight so Cesaro says he’ll see him out there.

Charlotte yells at Dana for failing and implies that Dana is her assistant. Dana is of course mad but Charlotte says her payment is to be part of Charlotte’s legacy.

Sheamus vs. Zack Ryder

This is the second match in a row with no entrances, likely for the sake of more backstage stuff. Sheamus attacks early to start but gets caught by a quick dropkick and the Broski Boot. The Elbro gets two but the Rough Ryder is easily blocked. The Brogue Kick puts Ryder away at 1:53.

Sheamus beats him up even more until Crews runs out for the save.

We get a video of Kane winning Money in the Bank in 2010 and cashing in the same night.

Kevin Owens interrupts Kane and Shane’s talk but he wants to talk to Stephanie. Apparently Alberto Del Rio just arrived twenty minutes ago and should be taken out of the Money in the Bank match as a punishment. Del Rio, already in his gear, comes in to blame Owens for calling airport security to get him delayed for five hours. They start yelling in Spanish and French until Kane cuts them off with an idea. How about a tag match against the Lucha Dragons with the winners getting the spot in the ladder match? Shane likes the idea and makes the match.

Sami Zayn vs. Cesaro

Feeling out process to start with Cesaro nipping up out of a wristlock but getting armdragged right back down. A nice tilt-a-whirl backbreaker plants Sami for and Cesaro sends him into the post as we take a break. Back with Cesaro hitting a corner uppercut and stomping on Sami’s chest for two. A quick Michinoku Driver gets two for Sami but he takes too long going to the top, allowing Cesaro to power through the apron superplex for another near fall. Back up and the Blue Thunder Bomb gets two, followed by the sunset bomb for…..actually for three on Cesaro at 8:06.

Rating: C+. That’s one of the few booking ideas I’ve seen tonight that I really like. Sami (and a lot of other people) have those big moves that never win anything so it’s a really good idea to have one get a pin every now and then to make you believe that it could get another one later. The loss doesn’t hurt Cesaro either as none of these wins really mean anything heading into the big gimmick match.

It’s time for the contract signing between John Cena and AJ Styles as moderated by Michael Cole. Cena hypes up Money in the Bank as a show bigger than Wrestlemania with a match fifteen years in the making. For years, the WWE bosses had told AJ Styles that he didn’t belong here. That’s nonsense because from PWG to New Japan to Ring of Honor, AJ Styles has been the best everywhere he’s gone. Sidebar: Is there any real reason why they won’t say TNA? Ring of Honor is arguably bigger and New Japan is definitely bigger but TNA isn’t allowed? Unless there’s some legal reason, I see no logical justification for not saying it.

Anyway Cena tells Cole to leave because this is going to get rowdy. AJ comes out and says he’s turned Cena’s world upside down. Cena agrees that it’s been done but there’s something up his sleeve. There are two contracts here, one of which says John Cena vs. AJ Styles and the other which says John Cena vs. AJ Styles w/The Club. Cena would love to sign the first one so we can have one heck of a fight on Sunday but if they sign the second one, AJ will win on Sunday and then start complaining the very next night when he doesn’t get the same respect.

AJ thinks Cena is so confident because of all the things he’s won but Styles wants to know what would have happened if AJ had been here fifteen years ago. My guess is not much because he still would have been a nothing tag guy but I get his point. AJ says he would have been the one on the covers of magazines and in all the movies. Cena cuts him off and says he’s heard this before and AJ doesn’t get it because he has the chance to prove it on Sunday.

AJ can sign one contract and prove how great he is or sign the other one and be put on a bullet train back to Japan because that’s where he left his balls. AJ grabs a pen and looks at the contracts before signing the one on one version. Styles says after Sunday, Cena’s time is up. As usual, this was AWESOME stuff.

We see Randy Orton winning Money in the Bank in 2013 and cashing in on Daniel Bryan at Summerslam.

Kevin Owens/Alberto Del Rio vs. Lucha Dragons

The winners are in Money in the Bank. Del Rio beats on Kalisto to start before it’s off to Owens who isn’t happy with the way Alberto is acting, only to calm down at the threat of a DQ. Owens teases walking out but comes back in when Alberto is rolled up for two. Kevin and Alberto get in a shoving match and get dropkicked to the floor, setting up a double dive from the Dragons as we take a break.

Back with Kalisto eating a clothesline but Del Rio won’t tag out. Owens and Alberto get in another argument, allowing Kalisto to hit a quick Salida Del Sol to send Del Rio outside. Kevin throws his partner back in and it’s off to Sin Cara for the Swanton, only to have Owens breaks it up at two. The Pop Up Powerbomb ends Cara at 8:15.

Rating: C. I liked the idea of having something on the line here. Of course it wasn’t going to happen but it was nice to have a reason to care about the match. The Dragons are just so nothing these days and it’s sad to see the promise that Kalisto showed wasted as much as it has been.

Del Rio superkicks Owens post match.

Back from a break with Owens telling Stephanie that Sami Zayn is going to be on commentary for the main event. Stephanie is furious because that’s something so horrible so she makes Owens a commentator as well. Del Rio comes in and says he wants to be out there too so Stephanie makes him guest timekeeper.

Stephanie yells at Shane about his decisions so Shane makes Cesaro guest ring announcer. On another note, Kane isn’t getting the job running Smackdown. Kane comes in and asks if this is about electrocuting Shane’s testicles with a car batters. Shane tells Stephanie they’ll keep running Raw but he’ll run Smackdown on his own. This is getting old in a hurry and it’s only going to get worse.

Chris Jericho vs. Dean Ambrose

All of the other Money in the Bank participants are at ringside. Dean chops him down to start and scores with a quick suplex. Jericho is sent to the floor for a suicide dive before Dean knocks Owens’ headset off. Back in and Dean flips out of a Walls attempt but eats an enziguri. The corner dropkick puts Dean on the floor and it’s time for the announcers, timekeeper and ring announcer to stare at each other.

We come back from a break with Dean fighting out of a chinlock. Some clotheslines stun Jericho but he counters the top rope standing elbow drop into the Walls. Owens: “I taught him that!” Dean grabs the ropes but can’t get Dirty Deeds. Instead Jericho takes him down for two off the Lionsault, only to have Dean get up top for the elbow.

Byron asks how Kevin would handle not winning Sunday. Owens: “I would handle it the same way: I would come out here and slap your face.” Dean tries to put on the Walls but settles for a catapult out to the apron. Jericho runs to the top but dives into a kick, only to have the Codebreaker countered into Dirty Deeds for the pin at 11:58.

Rating: C. This would be the standard reversal of the match we saw on Smackdown because that’s what Smackdown is for: a dry run for the following Raw without any mention of the first match. It doesn’t help that these two have fought WAY too many times and it’s getting less and less interesting every single time.

Everyone brawls after the match with Owens bringing in a ladder, only to have Sami flip dive off the top onto the pile of people. Jericho wasn’t in that group though and goes up the ladder to pull down the briefcase to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling (and lack thereof at times) brings down what was an otherwise very strong show with two excellent talking segments. I’m more invested in the pay per view than I was coming in and that’s the point of a go home show. The Cena vs. AJ stuff was excellent as Cena is still the best hard seller in the business and the Shield segment made things feel more personal, especially with Dean at the end to add some flavor. As has been the case so many times, if this was a two hour show, it would have been one of the best in a long time. As it is though, it’s still good enough.

Results

The Club/Vaudevillains b. New Day/Enzo Amore/Big Cass – Magic Killer to Kingston

Paige b. Charlotte – Rampaige

Sheamus b. Zack Ryder – Brogue Kick

Sami Zayn b. Cesaro – Sunset Bomb

Kevin Owens/Alberto Del Rio b. Lucha Dragons – Pop Up Powerbomb to Cara

Dean Ambrose b. Chris Jericho – Dirty Deeds

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown – June 9, 2016: Keeping The Standard

Smackdown
Date: June 9, 2016
Location: Intrust Bank Arena, Wichita, Kansas
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Mauro Ranallo, Byron Saxton

We’re pretty much at business as usual here as Money in the Bank is a week from Sunday and most of the big stories are starting to round into form. AJ Styles is going after John Cena, the Tag Team Titles are in a big mess of a match and we’ll see yet another combination of the six Money in the Bank participants tonight because just having them be announced over time isn’t an option for whatever reason. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s the Club to get things going. AJ talks about how this Money in the Bank may be the best ever with the Club winning the Tag Team Titles and AJ himself taking care of John Cena. For ten years it’s been the John Cena Era and the New Era can’t really get started until he takes Cena out. When he came to WWE in the first place, he made it clear that the Club was a package deal. The Club has transcended countries, continents and companies. As for Cena, you can’t beat him.

Cue Enzo and Big Cass with the latter reminding AJ that there are two other teams going after the Tag Team Titles. The Mr. Clean Dream Team isn’t taking those belts but Karl says they’ve been traveling the world for ten years while Enzo was managing a Hooters. Enzo basically says “Well yeah. What’s wrong with that?” before saying the Club has wrestled everywhere but Antarctica.

Enzo would love to walk a mile in Karl’s shoes because then he’d be a mile away from him. The last time Enzo and Cass had a big match, Enzo fell asleep on the job. Enzo thinks that makes them a couple of haters so in Vegas, money will talk and money will walk. That makes Anderson and Gallows S-A-W-F-T.

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows

New Day is on commentary with Woods eating BootyO’s and Big E. holding a broom. Anderson runs Cass over a few times to start before it’s off to Gallows for a big boot. For some reason this makes New Day talk about pasta. The Enzo beating continues as Kofi puts Byron on grape duty, meaning he has to feed Kofi grapes on demand. Anderson throws him down to stop a tag attempt, making Kofi think Enzo should switch to Alfredo instead of the marinara.

Big E. does his nerdy commentator voice as Enzo Stuns Anderson over the top rope. A diving tag attempt is stopped by a running boot to the head as the Vaudevillains come out to watch. Back from a break with Gallows suplexing Enzo for two as the fans chant for Cass. Amore punches away but is shoved away, only to get caught by the jumping DDT. Now it’s the hot tag to Cass as house is quickly cleaned. A very big boot puts Gallows on the floor as New Day gets up to cut off the Vaudevillains. They all get in the ring and that’s a no contest at 10:54.

Rating: C. Cass continues to look like the biggest star out of all these guys and that big boot was awesome. I really can’t imagine the New Day keeps the titles after Money in the Bank and the Club would be the logical way to go with the belts. Enzo and Cass are hot right now though and you would have to expect Cass to get a big singles push soon.

Enzo and Cass clear the ring post match.

We recap Dean Ambrose vs. Chris Jericho, who will be facing each other tonight, focusing on the battle over the talk shows.

Muhammad Ali tribute.

The announcers talk about the Money in the Bank card.

Lana and Rusev aren’t worried about Titus O’Neil because Rusev is the real greatest of all time instead of Muhammad Ali. Titus comes in and says he’ll take the title at Money in the Bank by floating like a butterfly and stinging like a bee.

Cesaro/Sami Zayn vs. Alberto Del Rio/Kevin Owens

Sami and Owens start things off with Zayn spinning him around and sending him into the corner for a tag off to Del Rio. That’s fine with Alberto who kicks Sami’s leg out but lets the tag bring in Cesaro. Alberto takes over and asks Owens for a tag but Kevin says Del Rio is doing fine by himself and walks out. Sami chases him up the ramp so we’re down to a singles match.

A shot to the back puts Del Rio on the floor and it’s time for a break. Back with Del Rio getting two off a Backstabber. We hit the chinlock but Cesaro is up in less than five seconds. Well he’s certainly not lazy at least. Cesaro muscles him up into a suplex as Sami and Kevin fight back down the aisle. Del Rio isn’t cool with Owens walking out on him and now it’s Alberto walking out. Owens won’t let that happen so Sami dives over the top to take him out, leaving Cesaro to suplex Del Rio on the floor.

Back in and Del Rio starts in on the arm but can’t get the armbreaker. Everything breaks down and Swiss Death drops Del Rio again. Owens and Zayn are sent outside again, leaving Del Rio to take the Swing. Owens breaks up the Sharpshooter and crotches Cesaro on top, setting up the top rope double stomp from Del Rio, only to have Owens throw his partner out and steal the pin at 13:29.

Rating: C+. I’m normally not a fan of the way the build towards Money in the Bank goes but this was kind of a creative way to do more than just another tag match. I’m sure we’ll see something else like that next week because there’s almost no way around seeing those matches over and over but at least this was something fresher. The wrestling is all fine and having only six people keeps the match from being such a mess but a change to the build could be an improvement.

We look at Jericho destroying Mitch.

Dana Brooke vs. Becky Lynch

Natalya and Charlotte are at ringside. Dana immediately bails to the ropes but Becky snaps off some armdrags to send her outside. Back in and Lynch misses a charge, allowing Charlotte to get in a forearm like a good heel should. Becky comes back with a kick to the ribs but she has to go after Charlotte, triggering a brawl between Charlotte and Natalya on the floor. That earns them both an ejection, leaving Becky to make Dana tap with the Disarm-Her at 3:04.

Rating: C-. You know, I wouldn’t be opposed to them actually announcing the women’s match for the pay per view. I’m assuming it’s going to be a fatal fourway or a non-title tag match (which actually fits for a change) but anything is better than another Natalya title shot. Whatever gets us past this and on to Sasha FINALLY getting her title shot would be a good idea though.

Bob Backlund asks to see Darren Young’s victory celebration. Young starts doing the Millions of Dollars dance but Bob tells him to bring it back down to earth. Backlund tells him to save money, which Darren interprets as not going to the movies and no popcorn. Darren asks how Bob saves so much money, which apparently is all about wearing only one set of clothes. Young agrees to cut down on the shopping. Backlund: “How do you feel about a bow tie?”

Baron Corbin vs. Kalisto

Dolph Ziggler is on commentary because this thing just won’t die. Kalisto is still listed as one half of the Lucha Dragons despite them almost never teaming together anymore. Some quick kicks put Corbin on the floor to start but he shrugs off even more kicks and tosses Kalisto onto the barricade to take over.

We get the staredown with Ziggler, who says he’d love to take off his jeggings and get right in there. Back in and we hit the chinlock on Kalisto for a bit before he comes back with the corkscrew cross body. The headscissors driver gets two but Corbin just blasts him in the back of the head. End of Days puts Kalisto away at 3:45.

Rating: C. You can definitely add Kalisto to the long list of people who started fast until the company got bored with him and threw him to the side for their new favorite toy. The match was your normal boring stuff as Ziggler vs. Corbin is a feud that needed to wrap up two months ago but for some reason the thing just keeps going.

We look at Ambrose ripping up Jericho’s jacket. This feud really isn’t big enough to warrant this kind of attention.

Another chat about AJ Styles vs. John Cena with Lawler telling a story about having to face the top ten contenders in order to get a shot at NWA World Champion Jack Brisco. Why can’t we hear those stories more often?

Sheamus brags about the success of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Zack Ryder/Golden Truth aren’t all that impressed. Apollo Crews (Remember him?) comes in and Sheamus suggests that Crews get him a latte. Sheamus gets knocked through some well placed boxes.

Chris Jericho vs. Dean Ambrose

Ranallo says this is the first time these two have ever fought on Smackdown. Why is that supposed to be something interesting or appealing? I’ve never gotten that concept. Jericho shouts about the thumb tacks Dean put into his back and the chase is on outside. Back in and Dean strikes away, only to get clotheslined down. That means it’s time to yell about the tacks even more but a clothesline puts Jericho outside for the suicide shove.

Dean loads up the announcers’ table for Dirty Deeds but gets catapulted onto the floor for a big crash as we take a break. Back with Jericho suplexing him for an arrogant two, followed by the chinlock. Dean’s comeback is stopped with a clothesline and it’s time to choke on the ropes. Another comeback attempt works a bit better as Dean scores with a clothesline and elbows but Dirty Deeds is countered into a failed Walls attempt.

Jericho dives into a forearm to the jaw for two but comes back with a middle rope enziguri (looked like a missed dropkick) for two of his own. Dean breaks up a superplex attempt and grabs la majistral for two more before both guys collide to put them down. The Codebreaker and Dirty Deeds are broken up but Dean has to stop himself from running into the referee, allowing Jericho to grab a one legged Codebreaker for the pin at 13:46.

Rating: B-. Well so much for Dean’s hot streak. The match was fine but that cage match destroyed a lot of my interest in this feud. Jericho only has so much interest these days and it makes sense to have him win a match here or there since he has almost no chance of winning the ladder match. Then again that’s what people were saying before he fought AJ at Wrestlemania.

Post match Jericho grabs a ladder but gets sent face first into it for his efforts. The standing elbow drop from the ladder crushes Jericho to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Totally run of the mill Smackdown here as it was missing most of what I liked about the show last week. Most of the Money in the Bank card (which is looking stacked) is set so this was a bunch of supplemental material. To be fair though, we’re five weeks away from the end of Smackdown before it gets turned into something new, which hopefully turns the thing around for a change.

Results

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson went to a no contest when New Day and the Vaudevillains interfered

Kevin Owens/Alberto Del Rio b. Sami Zayn/Cesaro – Top rope double stomp to Cesaro

Becky Lynch b. Dana Brooke – Disarm-Her

Baron Corbin b. Kalisto – End of Days

Chris Jericho b. Dean Ambrose – Codebreaker

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01FWZZ2UA

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Monday Night Raw – May 23, 2016: Crying All The Way To The Bank

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 23, 2016
Location: Royal Farms Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re past Extreme Rules and now on to Money in the Bank season, meaning we might start tonight with some qualifying matches. However, the bigger story coming out of last night is the return of Seth Rollins, who attacked WWE World Champion Roman Reigns after Reigns retained over AJ Styles. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the main event and Rollins making his return.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Seth to get things going, complete with a new graphic that says “Redesign, Rebuild, Reclaim.” He certainly looks like a face to start though I wouldn’t put money on that one. Rollins gets a nice WELCOME BACK chant before smiling at the crowd and saying it’s been 200 days since he’s been in this ring. In case you’ve been living under a rock (or in case you’re really not paying attention), he’s back. He’s here to get back the title that he never lost and last night he fired the first shot with the Pedigree on Reigns.

The fans keep freaking out so Rollins asks if they missed him. Fans: “YES! YES! YES!” Rollins brings up some of the dastardly things he’s done over the years and about how the fans didn’t buy him by calling him a coward who hid behind the Authority. Then his knee went out from all the weight of carrying this company. Over the last few months he’s gotten so many fan letters but he put every one of them in a garbage can and set them on fire.

None of these fans were here with him when he was rehabbing his knee twice a day. Now he’s back on his own to get the title back but here’s Reigns to interrupt. Rollins of course bails and says it’s happening on his time. This brings out Shane to invite Rollins back inside for an adult conversation. This conversation consists of Shane making Roman vs. Seth for the title at Money in the Bank.

Sheamus talks about how much he can’t stand Sami Zayn and this New Era. Tonight he’s going to give Sami a beating for all the people who are sick of this foreigner coming in with his stupid hat. Nothing wrong with a simple, old school pre-match promo.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Sheamus vs. Sami Zayn

Sheamus takes him down into a wristlock to start, followed by a legdrop of all things. Sami sends it outside with a hurricanrana, only to have Sheamus put a knee in his ribs to send us to a break. Back with Sheamus getting two off the Irish Curse but Sami BLASTS him with a clothesline and gets two off the Michinoku Driver. The Brogue Kick misses and Sami clotheslines him to the floor, only to have the flip dive blocked by a forearm. Sheamus gets back in and eats a quick Helluva Kick for the pin at 10:00.

Rating: C. Well that’s a pleasant surprise, even though there was little doubt that Sami was going to win here. Sami winning is a good option as he’s the epitome of someone who you believe could pull off the big surprise, even though he’s likely only there to take big bumps and sell like no one else can.

Post match Sheamus is furious.

After a break, Apollo Crews is talking about how this is the biggest match of his life when Sheamus jumps him from behind and lays him out.

Here’s New Day for a six man tag and they’ve got a birthday cake. Tonight is the 1,200th episode of Monday Night Raw and that means it’s time to celebrate. However, since cakes in wrestling rings always end up in someone’s face, Big E. picks up the cake and takes it outside to get things out of the way. As he threatens Byron Saxton, cue the Social Outcasts to jump New Day from behind and take us to a break.

New Day vs. Social Outcasts

Joined in progress with Kofi hurricanranaing Slater out of the corner and stomping him down in the corner. Slater is sent to the floor for a Bo Train but Heath collapses, leaving the other two to take a flip dive from Woods. The Midnight Hour puts Slater away at 2:00.

Slater takes the cake post match.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Cesaro vs. The Miz

Non-title. Before the match, Miz and Maryse celebrate their win and promise to win the briefcase again, setting up Miz’s biopic. Cesaro starts fast with the uppercuts in the corner for two before diving over the top to take Miz out again. He even tells Maryse to talk to the hand, taking us back to about 1997.

Back in and Cesaro gets two more off a delayed suplex to send Miz outside as we take a break. We come back with Miz hitting the Reality Check but charging into the uppercut. The Swing doesn’t work because of the shoulder but Miz can’t hit the Skull Crushing Finale. Instead it’s another uppercut and the Neutralizer for the pin on Miz (of course) at 11:24.

Rating: C+. Yo Miz! Thanks for stealing the show last night. Here’s a clean loss to the guy that made you tap out last night. I’m getting to the point where I can’t even complain about these losses anymore. They’re just a fact of life in WWE and nothing is going to change that because WWE doesn’t know any better.

We recap the opening segment.

Rollins talks about how Money in the Bank is his thing when Stephanie comes in. Rollins is all nice to her but she says things have changed around here.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Chris Jericho vs. Apollo Crews

Crews seems just fine after the beatdown earlier tonight while Jericho’s back is covered in bandages from the thumbtacks. Jericho throws a t-shirt in Crews’ face to start and hammers away, only to have Crews just hit him in the bandages because Crews has an IQ above butter. Jericho’s dropkick and chinlock don’t do much as Apollo elbows him in the jaw and avoids the dropkick out of the corner to send Jericho outside.

There’s a moonsault from the apron (mostly missed) to drop Jericho again but Jericho counters the toss powerbomb into the Walls. A rope is grabbed and Crews tries to nip up, only to have Jericho Lionsault onto him for two. Another Walls attempt is countered into a small package, only to have the Codebreaker puts Apollo away at 7:46.

Rating: C+. I’m so glad they brought Crews up for this spot. It’s not like they have a small army of people who can take this loss and not lose a thing as a result. The match was fine, even though Crews didn’t sell a thing from the beatdown earlier. He can’t even hold his back or something? Jericho going to the ladder match is fine but Crews is already looking like another failed call up.

Sheamus laughs at the result.

Life Lesson with Bob Backlund from Smackdown.

Baron Corbin beat Dolph Ziggler last night because he can. This brings in Ziggler, to say Corbin can’t beat him in a straight match. Corbin agrees but doesn’t want to see Ziggler again after. Ziggler promises to steal the show tonight.

Here’s Big Cass, who points to the entrance for the returning Enzo Amore. Enzo is VERY fired up to be back and talks about how he’s back because if he had a dime for every time he got knocked down and didn’t get back up, he would have ZERO DIMES. Cass is ready to kick Bubba Ray Dudley in the head and send him into a pool like a basketball.

Big Cass vs. Bubba Ray Dudley

Feeling out process to start until D-Von goes after Enzo, allowing Bubba to get in a belly to back suplex. He spends too much time shouting though, allowing Cass to take over with a clothesline. A Stinger Splash has Bubba in trouble and we keep up the Sting treatment with Cass slamming him off the top. Cass’ big boot and the empire Elbow put Bubba away at 3:11.

Rating: D. Now this is the kind of thing they need to be doing. Enzo is fine as the guy that gets in trouble so Cass can come in and clean house later on. Enzo can be in a match here or there and that’s fine, but the last few weeks have shown that Cass is the real star of the team and the guy who could get one heck of a push.

Here are Charlotte, Ric Flair and Dana Brooke to talk about their win last night. Ric….oh my goodness he is BOMBED. Anyway, Ric talks about how Charlotte has earned her way to the top and been amazing at everything she’s done. As for Dana, she doesn’t exist without Charlotte, which Dana seems to agree with. Charlotte talks about how her dad was never there for her on Christmas and birthdays because Flair was off being the man. Now Charlotte gets it though because now she’s the woman.

That power makes her be able to say it to him: get out of her ring. Charlotte goes on a rant about how she doesn’t need her dad anymore and how she’s going to be better than the sixteen time World Champion has ever been. She’s tired of having everyone look at her and ask how Ric is doing so now he is dead to her. Charlotte doesn’t want to talk and tells Ric to get out because he can watch her on TV like she did with him for thirty years. Ric leaves in tears while Charlotte and Dana pose. Charlotte still needs practice talking but this worked exactly as it was supposed to.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler headlocks him to the mat to start but Dean slams him with ease and throws Dolph out to the floor. The dive doesn’t get to launch as Ziggler steps to the side as we take a break. Back with Ziggler getting butterfly superplexed for two but missing a dive. Dean’s top rope elbow is countered into a rollup for two, followed by the Fameasser for the same.

Both guys try cross bodies at the same time and we get a quick breather. Dean gets superkicked to little effect as he bounces off the ropes with the rebound lariat for two. Ambrose goes for the elbow again but gets dropkicked out of the air this time. The Zig Zag is countered though and Dirty Deeds sends Dean to the ladder match at 12:09.

Rating: B-. Dean winning a bunch of matches in a row is the way to help him get over the Lesnar loss, as well as keep him from looking like such a big loser in general. Ziggler losing is fine and I’m glad it was clean, though I would have been fine with Corbin interfering to cost him the match.

Ric is leaving and even Arn Anderson can’t make him feel better. Renee Young asks if he has anything to say but Ric gives a very sad forced smile and leaves. That was one of the best scenes I’ve seen in wrestling in a long time. Ric genuinely looked devastated and had nothing to say. It was quiet, it was emotional and it felt real.

The Shining Stars want us to visit Puerto Rico.

Here’s AJ Styles with something to say before his match. AJ talks about how he would have been WWE Champion if not for Anderson and Gallows. This brings the big balds to the ring, where they question what he just said. AJ didn’t bring these guys to the WWE to take out everyone in his way but the way they see it, if this was in Japan, Styles would have been buying them a round of drinks after what happened last night.

AJ thinks it’s time for them to go their separate ways but Anderson and Gallows suggest that AJ never would have made it out of Japan (or a bunch of bar fights for that matter) without them. Styles says they’re still brothers and friends but not on the same team. Gallows says no way because they’re not even friends anymore. That seems to be fine with AJ as the two of them leave.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens

They slug it out to start until Owens grabs a headlock (“HEADLOCK MASTER!”), only to eat a good dropkick for two. Owens gets in a dropkick of his own but AJ bails to the apron. AJ is pulled face first into the apron with Owens heading back inside but rolling under the ropes instead of diving over the top like he was teasing. As usual he’s the best troll in wrestling.

Back from a break with AJ fighting out of a sleeper and hammering away on the floor. They slug it out inside with AJ getting the better of it, only to be pulled off the ropes and sent into the corner with a German suplex. The Cannonball is followed by Owens telling Cole to shut up but AJ gets in a jumping enziguri. That’s fine with Owens who comes back with his brainbuster onto the knee for two but misses the moonsault.

AJ sends him outside and knees him in the jaw, only to eat the Pop Up Powerbomb onto the steps. Somehow AJ beats the count back in (that’s a bit much) and gets in a quick Pele. He really shouldn’t be up that fast after a finisher onto the steps but finishers haven’t meant anything in WWE in forever. The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up though and the Pop Up Powerbomb gives Owens the pin at 16:20.

Rating: B. That was quite the surprise as I was thinking they might go to a double countout to send both guys in instead. Owens certainly deserves the spot and I would LOVE to see what he could do as a Mr. Money in the Bank. Good match here, but would you have expected anything else from these two?

Overall Rating: B-. This was a wrestling focused episode that actually moved some stuff forward. It’s always a nice sign and a good idea to have a fresh set of stories that give fans things they’ve been wanting, save for ANYONE else as the top face of course. I was really liking Charlotte turning on Ric as it’s long overdue and also a well done segment. The show being all about wrestling helped a lot though, as did the extreme lack of McMahons. It was about moving things forward and the show went by quickly as a result. Good stuff here and I’m glad they went this way for a change.

Results

Sami Zayn b. Sheamus – Helluva Kick

New Day b. Social Outcasts – Midnight Hour to Slater

Cesaro b. The Miz – Neutralizer

Chris Jericho b. Apollo Crews – Codebreaker

Big Cass b. Bubba Ray Dudley – Empire Elbow

Dean Ambrose b. Dolph Ziggler – Dirty Deeds

Kevin Owens b. AJ Styles – Pop Up Powerbomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on NXT: The Full Sail Years Volume II at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown – May 19, 2016: Please Let It End On Sunday

Smackdown
Date: May 19, 2016
Location: Bon Secours Wellness Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

It’s the final show before Extreme Rules and this past Monday wasn’t exactly the strongest episode of Raw in recent memory. The stories are starting to run out of steam and Sunday can’t get here soon enough. Odds are tonight is going to be about the Intercontinental and WWE World Title stories, which could go a few different ways each. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap focuses on Monday’s oddball tag match and makes sure to show Shane and Stephanie setting it up in case you’re stupid enough to think these matches are just happening.

Opening sequence.

Kevin Owens vs. Cesaro

Miz, Maryse and Sami Zayn are on commentary. Miz gets right to the point and says tonight’s MizTV is canceled. It never ceases to amaze me that they feel the need to change plans from Monday to Tuesday. They slug it out to start as Miz and Sami bicker about Miz constantly getting beaten up. Since this is WWE, the camera keeps cutting to the announcers’ table so we can see them arguing, completely defeating the point of them being on commentary.

Cesaro dropkicks him out to the floor, followed by some chops. Back inside and Cesaro stops for a quick Rumba. I mean of course that’s just a guess as I can’t see what he’s doing because we’re looking at the announcers’ table again but it’s my best guess. Owens bails from the threat of a European uppercut so Cesaro follows him out for the running version up against the barricade. Maryse offers a distraction and Owens knocks Cesaro into the table and then whips him into the steps for a bonus.

Owens mocks Miz’s flapping arms and drops a backsplash for two (Owens: “HOW IS MY CLOSEUP?”). Maryse yells at Sami in French, forgetting that he’s from Montreal. Another backsplash hits raised knees because you can’t hit the same spot twice (makes sense in theory, though Cesaro should have known that the first one was coming given how Owens uses it in every match) but Owens sends him into the corner for the Cannonball.

Back from a break with another shot of the commentary team showing Miz and Maryse kissing. Cesaro fires in an uppercut to break up the frog splash and grabbing a gutwrench superplex to put both guys down. A high cross body gets two for Cesaro as the wrestlers on commentary actually start paying attention and breaking down the match. The Swing doesn’t work though and Owens bails to the floor, only to have him blast Sami in the face.

Cesaro flips off the apron to take out Owens before punching Miz in the face. Back in and Cesaro’s eats a superkick for two but Sami comes in, only to have Cesaro punch him in the face, either over the Helluva Kick last week or to prevent a DQ. The distraction lets Owens get in a rollup with a handful of trunks for the pin at 14:48.

Rating: B-. I’m really digging the idea they’re going with here and it’s actually turned into a four way feud instead of two guys feuding and the other two just being there on the side. I’m actually not sure who walks out with the title on Sunday and it would seem that there are multiple ways to go after the match is over. That’s a hard thing to pull off but they’ve managed to do it with four talented guys doing what they’re supposed to do.

Post match Sami gives Cesaro the Helluva Kick but takes the Skull Crushing Finale.

Paige vs. Dana Brooke

Becky Lynch is on commentary and says her eye injury is the worst thing she’s ever had because the double vision means she has to see Dana twice. Paige knees her in the face to start as we hear about Becky fighting Paige’s mom over in the UK. Dana trips Paige up though and we hit a leg scissors back inside. Becky thinks she should be named Becky Balboa because she keeps getting up like Rocky. Some kicks and knees stagger Dana but she grabs a Samoan Driver for the upset pin at 3:16.

Rating: D+. Dana looked better here but that might be due to how short the match was, which always helps things out a little bit. Brooke has a great look and a lot of potential but she just needs more time in the ring, preferably down in developmental. She’s just been called up too early to be on her own, which to be fair wasn’t the plan until a few days ago. That being said, what the heck has happened to Paige? She’s gone from the top of the division to absolutely nothing in no time. I really don’t get it.

Lana, with that accent dying faster than Paige’s push, says Kalisto is hiding behind his mask and that Rusev is the greatest champion of all time. Rusev says the chant will be MACHKA MACHKA MACHKA.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus

It feels like we haven’t seen Sheamus in a long time. Ziggler is shoved around to start before coming back with knees and right hands in the corner. A hard ax handle to the face drops Ziggler though and we take a break. Back with another ax handle blasting Dolph in the face before his superkick is countered with an elbow to the knee.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Ziggler fights up and gets in a Fameasser for a near fall. The neckbreaker is broken up though and Sheamus gets two off the Irish Curse. Back up and the Zig Zag is countered but Sheamus misses a charge, setting up a superkick to give Dolph the fluke pin at 10:48.

Rating: C-. Sheamus has just died since the League split up. I had forgotten that he was around for a bit as he was only in the battle royal recently and then hadn’t been seen since. Ziggler vs. Corbin isn’t much better though as I have no idea why they’re feuding, especially since Corbin should have won in the first place but we need to give Ziggler a fluke win instead.

Corbin comes out to say he’ll hurt Ziggler on Sunday.

The Asylum cage is lowered and here’s Chris Jericho for a chat. Jericho demands quiet by saying QUIET over and over before pointing out the cage hanging above us. Well to be fair no one noticed the cage hanging above the ring on Raw until Ambrose pointed it out so that was kind of necessary. Jericho lists off all of the matches that he’s been in over the years and admits that he’s never been in an Asylum match because there’s never been one. However that means Ambrose hasn’t been in one either, meaning Jericho has the advantage because he’s smarter and crazier.

Jericho asks that the cage be lowered as he talks about how he put Dean in the hospital with a twenty pound plant. Looking up, Jericho adds up the days he can put Dean in the hospital by using all of these weapons, which he sees as at least forty days. That’s not counting all the mental anguish that goes with it, but above all else, Dean is receiving the Gift of Jericho. As the crowd drinks it in, a production worker comes in and of course it’s Dean, who beats Jericho down with a kendo stick to send him running off. Guys in costumes are always an effective idea so this was fine.

And now, a life lesson with Bob Backlund. Bob talks about how Darren should be able to memorize these things and demands that he recite the Presidents of the United States in order. Young: “Coach no one can do that.” Backlund: “Washington, Adams, Jefferson….” Young swears a bit and Backlund LOSES IT, saying that no one needs that kind of language and demands 200 jumping jacks because Young needs to be great in the ring. These are really funny bits and I’m sure that Young in front of a blue background and Backlund in front of a red one is coincidental.

Big Cass/New Day vs. Dudley Boyz/Vaudevillains

The announcers are flat out saying that Cass has been doing better since Enzo has been gone. During the entrances, we see the Vaudevillains destroying the time machine, which messes up the announcers’ audio for some reason. D-Von and Big E. get things going with the latter getting two off a belly to belly. Byron’s audio is still barely audible as D-Von runs Kofi over and brings in Bubba, who misses a splash attempt. It’s time for the Unicorn Stampede before a big staredown takes us to a break.

Back with Woods hammering on Bubba in the corner until Ray clotheslines him down. Byron’s audio is back because we’re just that lucky. The Vaudevillains starts taking over now with Gotch snapmaring Woods so English can drop a knee for two. The Dudleyz don’t seem thrilled with their lack of ring time here as Bubba shouts at Gotch for tagging in English instead of D-Von.

Bubba comes in instead and punches away while shouting about Bootyo’s. Woods finally gets away and makes the hot tag off to Cass for the house cleaning. Everything breaks down and Big E. suplexes Gotch before throwing Kofi over the top onto English. A pretty horrible looking East River Crossing (mostly botched as Bubba is a bit too big) sets up the Empire Elbow to give Cass the pin at 10:38.

Rating: C. I’d be really surprised if they don’t give Cass a spot on Sunday’s card in an added match. They certainly seem to be pushing him at this point and it’s really cool to see someone this young and brand new on the roster getting such a shot. I don’t know if he has everything to make it work but at least he’s getting a good start.

John Cena is back on May 30.

Long video on Natalya vs. Charlotte on Sunday with Charlotte talking about how she’ll be twice as good as her dad because she uses the Figure Eight instead of the Figure Four.

Luke Gallows vs. Roman Reigns

Non-title. Usos vs. Anderson/Gallows in a Texas Tornado match is official for Sunday. Sweet goodness just stop already. Anderson/Styles/Usos, the latter again without the Siva Tau, are at ringside here. They trade elbows to start but only Reigns goes down. A second elbow knocks him outside so Reigns comes back inside where his Samoan drop gets two. We take a break and come back with Reigns firing off kicks to the ribs until Gallows takes his head off with a clothesline for a near fall of his own.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before a corner splash crushes Reigns again. That’s enough action so we hit the chinlock again. Roman gets up for a jumping clothesline but AJ’s distraction lets Gallows get in a rollup for two. There’s the Superman punch but AJ grabs Reigns’ foot to break up the spear. Everything breaks down on the floor with Reigns kicking AJ in the face, only to walk into the Gallows’ Pole (chokebomb) for a very close two. Anderson comes in and that’s a DQ at 11:50, despite him not touching anything.

Rating: C+. Not a bad power brawl but you knew the ending was going to be screwy. I have no idea why they couldn’t just wait until Anderson actually did something before getting to the DQ but anything that lets these six brawl more is the right idea in WWE’s eyes. That being said, it would be nice if Anderson and Gallows could actually, you know, WIN SOMETHING eventually.

Post match Anderson gives Reigns the Boot of Doom and the fight keeps going. AJ is the only man standing but he takes too long loading up the announcers’ table. Reigns gets in a few shots but everyone else gets back in it to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Thank goodness it’s over. This wasn’t even a bad show or even a below average show. It was just incredibly boring for one simple reason: this is all padding instead of ANYTHING worthwhile (save for a decent Ambrose/Jericho segment). We’ve seen the opening match in various forms time after time, Dana doesn’t have a match on Sunday, Ziggler vs. Corbin has been done multiple times, Big Cass vs. New Day isn’t a match as far as I know and the main event stuff has been done to death.

I don’t remember the last time a company just ran out of steam like this the week before a pay per view but it’s been a rough two shows. Hopefully they don’t try to stretch these stories out through June as I don’t even want to imagine what we might have to sit through in that case. The quality was fine tonight but there’s just nothing interesting going on here.

Results

Kevin Owens b. Cesaro – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Dana Brooke b. Paige – Samoan Driver

Dolph Ziggler b. Sheamus – Superkick

Big Cass/New Day b. Dudley Boyz/Vaudevillains – Empire Elbow to Bubba Ray

Roman Reigns b. Luke Gallows via DQ when Karl Anderson interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw – April 4, 2016: Hitting The Ground Limping

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 4, 2016
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

It’s pretty much New Year’s Day in WWE after everything came to a big conclusion last night. We’re officially in the Roman Reigns Era (part three) and hopefully that means a little break from the Authority. The other interesting thing will be seeing where the McMahons go from here because they’re the real stars of this show. Let’s get to it.

Again I was in the arena for this show so my perspective might be a bit different.

We open with a long recap of Wrestlemania, because what else are they going to start with?

Opening sequence.

The announcers tell us that the crowd is going to be “non-traditional” tonight. Translation: “Please don’t listen to the fans booing Reigns. He’s really AWESOME!” JBL says they’re just having fun. If fun means chanting for the Sheraton Hotel room that came in their travel packages, followed by a TRAVEL PACKAGE chant, I’d rather sign up for misery.

Here’s Vince to get things going and the fans actually sing his theme song. Vince: “Exactly the same chance my son had against the Undertaker!” He brings up Reigns winning the title and the fans are really not pleased. However, as of this morning the lock box is all taken care of, save for explaining what the heck that’s about. Last night was a great night but seeing his grandsons out there with Shane got to him a bit. It almost got to him when Shane climbed the Cell, which of course draws a Shane O’Mac chant.

Vince promises that tonight is a night we’ll never forget and goes to leave but Shane slowly limps out to cut him off. The fans thank Shane but he wants to shake Vince’s hand (“Since I’m the only man in the family.”) because Vince won at Wrestlemania. Shane thanks the fans and goes to leave but Vince cuts him off and blames the fans for what happened last night. Vince cuts him off again and says no one upstages him. He’s often thought how insane it would be to have Shane running Raw…..so let’s see how bad it can get.

Yes Shane is now in charge of Raw, completely negating A MONTH AND A HALF of storylines, along with erasing the point of last night’s Cell match. It’s almost like they booked themselves into a stupid corner with the story and had to find a way out of it while completely throwing logic out the window. This is the kind of nonsense that gets old in a hurry because I basically spent a month and a half trying to make sense of this stuff and then they say “oh never mind because we’re just doing what Vince was so scared of because.” Why? Just because. That drives me crazy but it happens far too often around here.

Here’s New Day for a talk before their title defense. Woods now has a smaller horn for reasons that aren’t likely to be explained. Maybe Vince just lost his mind and felt it should be smaller. The fans do the HEY! WE WANT SOME NEW DAY song before Big E. says things didn’t go according to plan last night.

Kofi did get to twerk with Shawn Michaels but Woods took a Stunner. Woods: “Upon further review of the tape, I have to admit….that it was pretty much my own fault.” However, they now have the last piece of Bootyo’s from last night, which will be playing the role of Simba as Woods hums Circle of Life from Lion King. It’s one of my all time favorites and the fans dug the heck out of that bit.

Tag Team Titles: King Barrett/Sheamus vs. New Day

The challengers come out after a break but first we get to see Lillian dancing with New Day, which she actually did twice. Kofi and Sheamus go into the corner to start as the announcers talk about the Shane story because the Tag Team Titles aren’t interesting enough. Everything breaks down and the League is sent outside, followed by Kofi being launched over the top (complete with fanfare from Woods) for a big crash.

Sheamus gets back up and knocks Kofi off the top for a crash but thankfully Woods is there to reassure him that the Bootyo is magical. Kofi fights back on Barrett but gets kicked hard in the ribs. We take a break and come back with the Wave going on in the background. Even Sheamus gets in on it, which actually causes Woods to get the mic and say if you like the Wave you like Sheamus.

This was the second time he said something like that after he had to get the fans to stop chanting Rocksteady during the break. To his credit, the crowd stopped cold both times so that seems to be the solution to the annoying chants. Kofi kicks Sheamus away and makes the hot tag as the fans are busy chanting about how awesome they are. Big E. starts in with the suplexes and the Warrior splash, followed by a whip to send Barrett into Sheamus. The Midnight Hour retains the titles at 8:45.

Rating: C. The match was fine but I’m sick of seeing these groups fight. There has to be someone else that New Day can fight, even if it’s some pairing of two big heels. The League just isn’t interesting no matter how many times they call themselves the lads or spin their fingers around their heads. New Day is way over but they’re getting into that Edge and Christian territory of having no one to feud with. At least they’re getting a nice long reign out of it though and with those shirts selling as strong as they do, the team isn’t going anywhere anytime soon.

Post match Sheamus says he’s had it with all this losing. Every time he looks at one of these losses, he sees one weak link and that’s going to change. That means a Brogue Kick to Barrett, which draws out the Wyatts to destroy the remainder of the League, complete with the fans singing He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands. So there’s the face turn for the Wyatts, though let’s look at this League thing for a minute.

Did Sheamus forget that whole THEY WON AT WRESTLEMANIA part? Barrett knocked Woods silly to set up the win but now he’s kicked out after one loss? As has been proven already, it seems that New Day should have won at Wrestlemania to set this up, especially since they won here like the Wrestlemania match meant nothing. It’s bad storytelling and really should have been fixed before it became a stupid moment.

Vince goes to leave the arena but tells Renee Young that Shane is only in charge temporarily. He’s leaving early because this is going to be a disaster and he doesn’t want to watch the ship go down.

Summer Rae vs. Sasha Banks

Summer actually gets promo time and says if she was in charge of Bad and Blonde last night, they wouldn’t have wound up flat on their faces like Sasha did. Banks is back in the shorts tonight. She grabs the mic away from Summer and reminds us that she is in fact the Boss before slapping Summer in the face. Summer begs off like a heel should and suckers Sasha in to a neck snap across the middle rope. We’re in a chinlock thirty seconds in but Sasha is quickly up with a snapmare and running knees to the chest for two. The Bank Statement makes Summer tap at 1:40.

Shane McMahon is talking to Apollo Crews.

Apollo Crews vs. Tyler Breeze

This is Crews’ main roster debut after only a few months down in NXT. Then again when you have those natural gifts, it’s not expected that you’ll see him in developmental that long. Crews starts fast with a pop up powerslam for two, followed by a suplex from Breeze for the same. We’re already in the chinlock and it would be nice for Crews to at least look….something. He’s just kind of there and ignoring that someone has him in a chinlock. Crews pops up with the gorilla press and standing moonsault, followed by the lifting powerbomb for the pin at 1:52. Typical debut squash.

Clips of Charlotte and Roman Reigns on the Today Show.

Here’s Reigns to open the second hour with even louder booing than the previous night. During the entrance, JBL says Reigns is so happy to finally be on top of the mountain. That would be back on top of the mountain actually because this is his third reign which is supposed to mean more than the first two. The people boo him again but Reigns says he’s not a bad guy. He’s not a good guy either. No he’s just THE guy because he won the World Title in the biggest Wrestlemania of all time. If anyone wants to come get this title from him, he’s not going anywhere.

This brings out Chris Jericho, who brags about all his successes, which are far stronger than anything Reigns has ever done. Jericho stops though and calls out the fans for their stupid chants because they’re not going to hijack the show. Fans: “WE ARE IDIOTS!” Jericho rips on the internet favorite AJ Styles, which brings out Styles himself.

Before he can say anything though, here’s Kevin Owens. Again nothing is said though because Sami Zayn comes out, likely due to his leash to Owens getting a bit too tight. Owens and Zayn go right at it and fight to the floor with Zayn hitting a big flip dive. AJ is sent outside and Jericho eats a spear.

Of note: Zayn seemed to land awkwardly on that flip dive and BOLTED to the back with his arm dangling by his side. He ran off while the lights were down so most people couldn’t see him but it was definitely visible.

We look back at Vince agreeing to let Shane run Raw.

Back from a break and Shane makes a four way between Zayn, Owens, Jericho and Styles for the #1 contendership. Reigns thinks that’s just fine.

Baron Corbin vs. Dolph Ziggler

Before the match, Corbin says all you need to know about him is this trophy. Ziggler hammers away in the corner but gets elbowed in the face for his efforts. A forearm knocks Ziggler off the apron and we take a break. Back with Ziggler in a nerve hold and the fans cheering for a beach ball because some nitwit fan felt the need to pull one out and bat it around.

This would be during the Raw debut of an NXT talent that the same people probably begged to be promoted for months while chanting for NXT. I’d also be willing to bet that they’ll blame Vince for not pushing Corbin properly while Vince’s reaction is “they saw him in his first match and would rather play with a beach ball.” BUT THEY’RE JUST HAVING FUN! Anyway Corbin misses a charge and hits the post, setting up a neckbreaker for two. Deep Six gets the same for Corbin and they head outside into the crowd for the double countout at 8:32.

Rating: D+. This was an awkward one as Ziggler was kind of being squashed but is too big of a star for that treatment and tried to fight back but couldn’t make it work. Corbin looked good but I’m not sure why they didn’t just have him get the win here. It’s not like Ziggler can’t bounce back from a dozen losses or anything like that so just give Corbin the big win here. At least he didn’t lost though.

Post match Corbin gives him the End of Days on the floor.

We look back at Lesnar destroying Ambrose last night.

Here’s Zack Ryder with something to say. When Ryder was a kid he got to meet Razor Ramon and hold the Intercontinental Title. Well last night they took another picture with Ramon holding Ryder’s title, which makes for a really good pair of photos. Ryder thanks his dad (in the front row) but here’s Miz to interrupt. Last night Ryder stole what belongs to Miz and now it’s time to show that Ryder is just a flash in the pan. That means it should be time for a title shot right now. Ryder says Woo Woo Woo let’s do this.

Intercontinental Title: Zack Ryder vs. The Miz

Ryder is defending of course. Miz can’t get in an early Reality Check so Ryder dropkicks him for two. A baseball slide sends Miz into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Ryder getting knocked to the floor like the jobber that he is. Ryder fights back with some clotheslines but misses a dropkick, setting up the low DDT for two. The Rough Ryder misses but Ryder counters a suplex with a neckbreaker. I’ve always liked that counter.

The Elbow gets two on Miz but the Broski Boot misses. They head outside in front of Zack’s dad, so as you might expect, Miz is shoved down by Ryder Sr. To be fair, Zack’s dad is in better shape than half the roster. Fans: “MR. RYDER!” This brings out Maryse of all people (Miz’s wife) to slap Papa Ryder in the face, which is enough of a distraction for Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin and the title at 10:26.

Rating: D. Yeah this didn’t work. You can push Ryder as having a big moment all you want but at the end of the day, he’s still the same Zack Ryder who has been a jobbing goon for years now. It would be a stretch to have him beat Miz in the first place and an even bigger stretch to have him beat Miz to retain the title. As I’ve said already though, this was pretty clearly Neville’s spot and he would have fit better, but I’m not sure who else they could have put here, especially if Miz is just getting the title back so soon.

Also of note: Lillian started to get in the ring to announce a match before Miz came out at all. This led to what looked like quite an argument at ringside which went on for a bit between Lillian and a producer.

Owens says he lost the title because he was in the ring with six other guys so the loss was hardly fair. Last night Sami Zayn stole the title from him but now it’s on to bigger and better things, like winning the WWE World Title. Sami cost him the Intercontinental Title last night but he’s not costing him the World Title tonight. The road to KO Mania II begins tonight.

The Vaudevillains are coming on Smackdown.

All of the women including Lita come for the formal presentation of the Women’s Title. Lita talks about not having many role models to look up to as a kid. That’s not the case for the youngest generation today though because this division has never been stronger. Charlotte is introduced but the fans cut her off by wanting some Bayley. She says this title is about all the women in this ring who made this happen and because of all the fans…..who won’t stop singing about how they want Bayley. JBL: “These people are rude.”

Charlotte finally goes with the heel stuff by saying she won the title, but now the fans are on a WOMEN’S WRESTLING chant. The real credit goes to Ric Flair though because she got her here. The energy from the fans fueled her to her victory. It makes her laugh that she hasn’t even been here for a year while some of the less successful women have been here seven or eight years.

Sasha and Becky walk out and the rest of the women follow, save for Natalya. Somehow this turns into an argument over the Harts and the Flairs because that’s still a thing they’re pushing. Also ignore the fact that we just saw Charlotte vs. Natalya and haven’t gotten Sasha vs. Charlotte in a one on one feud yet. Natalya puts her in the Sharpshooter until Ric makes the save.

AJ Styles says it’s a new beginning and the start of a new era. That new era is going to be phenomenal.

Video on Primo and Epico, who really like Puerto Rico. This might actually be a downgrade from Los Matadores.

Usos vs. Dudley Boyz

Tables match. It’s a brawl to start of course and they head outside as JBL talks about his tables matches against Bubba and D-Von. Jimmy gets slammed to set up What’s Up but Bubba won’t do GET THE TABLES. The Usos pop up and dive onto the Dudleyz and we take a break. Back with Jey breaking up a superplex through the table as the fans are almost entirely behind the Dudleyz.

Jimmy dives over a table and onto Bubba with a splash. A double superkick breaks up a double powerbomb attempt, followed by the Usos running the barricade for a double dive. Back in and the Superfly splashes miss but drive the Usos through the tables. Apparently that’s enough to give the Dudley Boyz the win at 8:53, even though it’s long since been established that you have to drive them through a table using an offensive move. They’re not announced as the winners and JBL acknowledges that it was an early bell.

Rating: D. A lot of these matches really aren’t working for me and a lot of that is due to this match not needing to happen. I’d assume we’ll get a third match between them soon enough because the world is waiting on seeing who gets the advantage in a feud that isn’t interesting in the first place. The Usos need a new direction because they’re getting less and less interesting every time they come out.

Sami Zayn says he’s been in every kind of match around the world. He talks about wrestling around the world when Kevin Owens jumps him and gives him a powerbomb through a table.

Post break the Dudleyz are still at ringside yelling…..and here come Enzo and Cass to the pop of the night. Cole: “If you haven’t got a sample of them…..well some would say you’re in for a treat.” The fans start a loud HOW YOU DOIN chant before Enzo talks about being a smack talker skywalker with a lightsaber in his hand. The Dudleyz are still standing in the aisle and Enzo thinks they’re jealous because they’re ugly.

Bubba and D-Von look almost scared at how stupid this sounds but Enzo says he’ll use the gift of jab to knock that lazy eye back into place. Enzo: “Fall back like your hairline!” Cass invites the Dudleyz down for a fight but they back off like true heels. That’s enough for Cass to declare them SAWFT to wrap this up. Yeah the insults were kind of lame but this was all about the delivery and the reaction and these guys look like stars.

Zayn is officially out of the four way but a replacement will be named.

Ryder gets his rematch on Smackdown.

Dr. Phil will be the guest star next week. Why? No reason of course but he’s a celebrity and therefore interesting.

Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho vs. AJ Styles vs. ???

The mystery entrant is……Cesaro, who was the most likely option and very well received by the fans. If nothing else we get a cool new entrance as Cesaro comes out in a tear away suit with trunks underneath. AJ and Jericho fight in one corner with the other two across the ring before it’s off to AJ vs. Cesaro to a very nice reaction. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker drops AJ for two and we take a break.

Back with Jericho suplexing Styles but Cesaro gets back in, only to have Owens break up the Swing. The big guys head outside again as Jericho loads up a superplex on AJ, only to have Owens and Cesaro come back in to make it a Tower of Doom. With everyone else down, Cesaro starts running the corners for European uppercuts, only to have Owens get a boot up. AJ enziguris Kevin but walks into Swiss Death. Jericho clotheslines Cesaro outside but gets jumped by his fellow Canadian.

The package side slam gets two on Jericho, who avoids a Cannonball. The Lionsault hits knees though, only to have AJ hit the springboard 450 for two of his own. Owens gets back again and tells AJ to stay down with his stupid haircut but Cesaro gets back in and sends both of them into the corner for rotating European uppercuts. Jericho takes over a third corner and now it’s time for triple rotating uppercuts.

Chris breaks it up but dives into the Swing as it’s all Cesaro at this point. Owens superkicks AJ to block a springboard and there’s the Pop Up Powerbomb for two on Styles. A Codebreaker gets the same on Owens with Cesaro making the save. Cesaro gets caught in the Walls but he reverses into the Sharpshooter to a big reaction. AJ makes the save with the forearm to Cesaro and Peles Owens to the floor, only to eat a Codebreaker for two. A quick backslide attempt has Jericho in trouble but AJ keeps rolling forward into the Clash for the pin and the title shot at 16:44.

Rating: B+. This match was a blast with four potential winners until Styles pulled off the big surprise pin. I’m not sure where Cesaro goes after this as you would assume Sami vs. Owens for Payback so maybe Cesaro gets Jericho. Styles vs. Reigns could be something interesting if they build it up properly but it could also be a borderline disaster with the fans booing Reigns out of the building.

AJ celebrated for a very long time after the show went off the air.

Overall Rating: B-. I had a good time here, despite some big holes in a lot of what was going on. The Raw after Wrestlemania isn’t about the in ring action but rather all the events that take place. Cesaro returning, Shane taking over Raw (and seems to be more off camera than the Authority, which is already a huge plus) and a bunch of debuts are a good sign and there should be some fun matches going into Payback, even though a lot of them aren’t hard to figure out. This may not have been a great, blow away show but it showed some promise going forward which is all it needed to do.

Results

New Day b. Sheamus/King Barrett – Midnight Hour to Barrett

Sasha Banks b. Summer Rae – Bank Statement

Apollo Crews b. Tyler Breeze – Lifting powerbomb

Baron Corbin vs. Dolph Ziggler went to a double countout

Miz b. Zack Ryder – Skull Crushing Finale

Dudley Boyz b. Usos – The Usos went through tables

AJ Styles b. Chris Jericho, Cesaro and Kevin Owens – Styles Clash to Jericho

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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NXT – October 16, 2014: Follow the NXT Road

NXT
Date: October 16, 2014
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Rich Brennan, Alex Riley, Renee Young

The road to whatever the next big show is called continues and apparently we’re now in the land of Titus O’Neil, who pinned Sami Zayn in last week’s main event. Adrian Neville made the save and is likely going to be Titus’ next opponent. It’s always hard to guess where things are going with NXT week to week so it’s likely something totally unrelated to last week. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Baron Corbin vs. Elias Sampson

End of Days, 18 seconds.

Here’s Sami Zayn with something to say. Last week he lost to Titus O’Neil and that’s not ok because he’s better than that. It’s time to refocus and go after the NXT Title (crowd ERUPTS for that) but Tyson Kidd has other thoughts. Tyson says it’s time to face facts and is wearing an InZayn shirt for some reason. He talks about how Sami is lying to the people because everyone knows he’s going to blow it like he always does.

Sami cuts him off at the knees by asking if Kidd has Natalya’s permission to be out here. Crowd: “YOU GOT SERVED!” Kidd laughs him off but Sami says it’s the start of his road to redemption. He’s good enough to be here and he’s good enough to beat Kidd, which he’ll prove tonight. Sami suggests to go find Breeze’s phone and call Nattie to make sure it’s ok. Kidd: “Why would Breeze have Natalya’s number?” Anyway the match is on for later.

Lucha Dragons vs. Wesley Blake/Buddy Murphy

Non-title. Murphy and Blake are now known as Team Thick. Cara backdrops Blake down and it’s off to Murphy early on. Sin tries a springboard DDT but gets muscled up into a suplex for two. Cool counter. The Thick guys take over on Cara with some power stuff, including a slam and chinlock from Murphy. Cara kicks away and makes the tag so Kalisto can clean house. Everything breaks down and Cara takes Murphy to the top for a superplex but jumps up for a victory roll and the pin at 3:21.

Rating: D+. The Dragons are a good high flying team and that’s all they need to be. I can’t imagine they’re a long term option with the belts, but the NXT Tag Team Titles have always beel dominated by big power teams instead of guys like the Dragons. Still though, they’re fine for a change of pace and this worked fine.

We see Tyler Breeze beating Mojo last week.

Rawley says he’s out for awhile because of the shoulder but it’s just taking one step back to take several forward. He tries to make this serious and intense and it just doesn’t work. The time off is a good thing for him though as he really needs to be repackaged.

Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Non-title. Becky takes her down with a quick armdrag and keeps Charlotte in trouble on the mat, only to charge into a backbreaker out of the corner. Charlotte puts on a figure four headlock and drives Becky’s face into the mat a few times for good measure. A double clothesline puts both girls down but it’s Lynch up first and in control. Some legdrops get two for Lynch but Charlotte comes back with a suplex for two of her own. Charlotte gets in a shot to the ribs and Natural Selection is good for the pin at 4:07.

Rating: C+. Good back and forth match here as Lynch continues to look like a star in the making. They’re playing up the idea that she has natural skills but she doesn’t have the experience to put it all together yet. It’s amazing how deep the division is with different characters, especially when you look at how generic most of the WWE Divas are.

We see Itami and Funaki getting beaten down last week.

Ascension says Itami is in for the same treatment as Funaki if he doesn’t back off.

Enzo Amore/Colin Cassady vs. Legionnaires

Cass throws Sylvester around to start and it’s off to Marcus, who goes nuts on LeFort over his bald head. We’ll call it a no contest at 30 seconds.

Carmella vs. Old Blue Pants

The fans and announcers have no idea who the jobber is so they name her after her pants. Carmella takes her down and puts on something like a Crossface with her legs for the submission at 32 seconds. I believe Blue Pants was a girl who wrestles under the name Leva Bates.

Sasha Banks and Becky argue over who is going to be the next Women’s Champion. Banks asks her what she’ll do to make it to the top.

Neville is defending against Titus O’Neil next week and is tired of all these Raw and Smackdown guys coming after his title.

Sami Zayn vs. Tyson Kidd

Sami talks a lot of trash to start before cranking on a headlock. He throws Kidd’s coat at him in the corner and you know it’s on now. Tyson tries to speed things up into a monkey flip but Zayn rolls to the side and is staring at Kidd when he gets up. Some more armdrags put Kidd on the floor and Sami teases a dive to mess with him. Kidd stalls on the floor and gets Zayn to chase him, only to jump to the apron for a kick to the face as we take a break.

Back with Kidd choking in the corner and driving an elbow into Sami’s head. A neckbreaker gets two and we hit the chinlock. Zayn fights up and nails a dropkick but misses the Helluva Kick. Instead a cross body is good for two and the Blue Thunder Bomb gets the same. Kidd comes back with a hard elbow to the face and a Moss Covered Three Handled Family Credenza for two of his own. The Sharpshooter goes on but Sami crawls over to the ropes. Sami suplexes him into the corner and the Helluva Kick is good for the pin at 10:30.

Rating: C+. These two are part of what is becoming the NXT version of the Smackdown Six (or four in this case). You can throw any combination of these two, Neville and Breeze out there and you’re going to have a good match. That’s a really valuable asset to have, but hopefully NXT doesn’t just let the same guys have the same matches over and over again to water down the matchups. Sami’s road to the title is clear, and man alive is that arena going to explode when he wins.

Overall Rating: C+. You can see the end for a lot of these stories, but we still have about six weeks to go to get there. This December special is going to be awesome with some long stories getting blown off and the winners that people want to see. It’s amazing how easy it is to have these stories with in depth characters but no major company seems capable of pulling it off. Good show this week as NXT is back on track.

Results

Baron Corbin b. Elias Sampson – End of Days

Lucha Dragons b. Wesley Blake/Buddy Murphy – Victory Roll to Murphy

Charlotte b. Becky Lynch – Natural Selection

Carmella b. Old Blue Pants – Leg choke

Sami Zayn b. Tyson Kidd – Helluva Kick

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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