Survivor Series Count-Up – 2021 (2022 Redo): Thank Goodness It’s Over

Survivor Series 2021
Date: November 21, 2021
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 15,120
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Pat McAfee

Since it’s Survivor Series and there are no other possible options for the show in the history of ever, it’s time for a Battle Of Brand Supremacy with wrestlers who have been on the roster for about a month. That means a battle of World Champions Roman Reigns and Big E., plus Survivor Series tag matches and….a Rock 25th Anniversary battle royal? Let’s get to it.

For the sake of simplicity, all matches involving champions are non-title.

Kickoff Show: Damian Priest (Raw) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura (Smackdown)

US Champion vs. Intercontinental Champion and Rick Boogs handles Nakamura’s entrance, much to Pat McAfee’s (now dancing on the announcers’ table) delight. Priest works on the arm to start but a Boogs guitar solo cuts that off, allowing Nakamura to grab a headlock. Nakamura takes him into the corner for Good Vibrations, with Boogs playing something that is in no way Good Vibrations.

Back up and Priest knocks him down and grabs a chinlock, meaning Boogs plays some more for a distraction. Some strikes to the head rock Priest and the sliding German suplex makes it worse (with McAfee jumping up to celebrate). Priest fights up and hits a running elbow in the corner, followed by a hard clothesline for two.

South Of Heaven is broken up though and Nakamura kicks him in the head again. Kinshasa is countered into South Of Heaven for two but the Reckoning is blocked. Priest counters an armbar into a triangle choke but Boogs guitars Nakamura to freedom AGAIN. Finally Priest goes outside and breaks the guitar (McAfee: “YOU SON OF A B****!”), with one of the pieces nailing Nakamura for the DQ at 9:24.

Rating: C. I was having fun with the back and forth as they had some chemistry together, but at the same time, there is only so much you can get with the constant Boogs interference. I do like that they didn’t have a champion get pinned here and instead went with Priest snapping to finish things up. Not a great match, but a fast paced one to start things off.

Smackdown – 1
Raw – 0

The opening video talks about how this is two sides battling….and we see a clip from Rock’s Netflix movie Red Notice. The voiceover talks about how many things the movie and show have in common before moving into the nonsense about this being the ONE NIGHT where Raw and Smackdown go head to head. Clips from the movie mock teamwork, which is what this show is all about. After more clips and more generic opening video statements about how important the show is, we’re ready to go.

We recap Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte. They were old friends but then both wanted to be the best, with Lynch getting there in a big way. Then Lynch left on maternity leave and Charlotte bragged about how great she (as in Charlotte) is so now that Lynch is back, it’s time to fight.

Before we got there though, there was also the VERY awkward moment where Charlotte was supposed to hand over the Raw Women’s Title and dropped it instead, leading to ALL KINDS of problems/discussion. Oh and Charlotte’s REALLY annoying “UH-OH” promo. This does at least have a personal story rather than just doing the Raw vs. Smackdown deal.

Charlotte (Smackdown) vs. Becky Lynch (Raw)

For a bonus, they’re both dressed as characters from Wandavision, with Charlotte as the villain and Becky as the hero. Becky hits her in the face to start and the brawl is on early. Charlotte goes for the leg but has to escape a Disarm-Her attempt. Back up and Charlotte hits a spear but Becky hits a heck of a spinning kick to the face. They head outside for a hard posting to Charlotte but it’s too early for the Manhandle Slam.

Charlotte gets her down and rams Becky’s face into the mat over and over. Becky is sent outside so Charlotte loads up the moonsault, which is shoved HARD into the barricade for a great looking crash instead. Charlotte sends her into the barricade and they both get back in at the same time for the big staredown. Becky avoids a shot to the knee in the corner but an armbar is countered into a powerbomb for two.

Some stomps in the corner have Charlotte in trouble and the fans aren’t thrilled with Becky. A fall away slam sends Becky into the corner for a crash, followed by the Andrade double moonsault for two. Charlotte snaps her throat first across the top but Becky knocks her into the ropes. The Fameasser onto the ropes gives Becky two and Charlotte misses the big boot, only to ram her head into Becky’s for two instead. The second big boot gets two instead so Becky is right back with a Christian layout reverse DDT.

Back up and the Manhandle Slam gives Becky two more, setting up a cross between a Figure Four and a heel hook. Charlotte turns it over for the break anyway and they’re both down for a bit. I’m not sure why Becky is down but it does make things a bit more dramatic. Yet another big boot knocks Becky outside and the moonsault…well it comes close to her at least, with the replay not making it any better.

Back in and Charlotte grabs her own Disarm-Her but Becky slips out. They fight into the corner where Charlotte grabs a rollup with ropes for two, as the referee sees the cheating. Becky reverses into a rollup of her own and doesn’t get caught grabbing the ropes for the pin at 18:13.

Rating: B+. These two work well and they treated it as a huge match, especially at the start where they both came out swinging. The ending was more of a way to save Charlotte than to give us a definitive winner, but after Charlotte has gone over so many times, doing a tainted job to the biggest female star ever isn’t asking too much. Great opener, with all kinds of energy and the big fight feel.

Raw – 1
Smackdown – 1

Classic Rock Moment: Debuting at Survivor Series 1996.

Raw Men vs. Smackdown Men

Raw: Seth Rollins, Finn Balor, Kevin Owens, Austin Theory, Bobby Lashley
Smackdown: Drew McIntyre, Jeff Hardy, King Woods, Happy Corbin, Sheamus

Survivor Series match and MVP/Madcap Moss are the respective sixths. Lashley has his spot after taking it from Dominik Mysterio and also caused Rey Mysterio to lose his spot to Theory. On the other side, Sami Zayn lost to Hardy, costing himself a spot on the team. You know, in case you needed a recap on the five people per show being thrown together. Rollins, the self proclaimed Raw captain, lets Owens start, so Owens bails to the floor and leaves for the countout less than a minute in.

After Owens takes a bow, McIntyre jumps Rollins on the floor as Theory comes in to face Woods. Theory gets his arm cranked on and it’s McIntyre coming in to launch him into the corner. Sheamus and McIntyre take turns chopping at Theory (McAfee is rather giddy) and Corbin gets in on it with a pretty good right hand. Theory manages to punch his way to freedom though and the tag brings in Rollins, who is knocked right back into the Smackdown corner.

It’s Hardy coming in to start on the arm and a quick splash gets one. Rollins is able to grab Sheamus by the arm though and Balor comes in to work on that arm for a change. Again though, that doesn’t last long as Sheamus drags him right back over for the tag to Corbin. We continue to e parade of arm cranking between people who don’t really dislike each other, making this match feel all the less interesting. Deep Six gets two on Balor with Lashley making the save, meaning everything breaks down.

With almost everyone else being knocked down, Balor kicks Corbin in the head and drops the Coup de Grace for the elimination. Hardy comes in to face Balor and the fans are rather pleased. It’s Hardy taking over with the basement dropkick but Balor’s own dropkick gets his own two. Lashley comes in for a running shoulder in the corner to Hardy, which has McAfee worried on commentary.

Hardy fights out of Balor’s chinlock and hits Whisper in the Wind, leaving Lashley and McIntyre to fight on the floor. Lashley posts him (McAfee: “DREW ARE YOU OK???”), leaving Theory to cover Hardy for two as the fans are interested in….something. It’s back to Woods to clean house, including a discus forearm to Theory. Lashley crotches Woods on top though and the Hurt Lock is good for the elimination to make it 4-3 Raw.

Everything breaks down again and Balor’s slingshot dive is pulled out of the air by Sheamus. We get the big Lashley vs. McIntyre showdown with Lashley backing up for some reason. McIntyre jumps him instead but Lashley powers him into the corner. That earns him a clothesline out to the floor with McIntyre following to post Lashley for a change. They fight over the barricade and that’s a double countout to get rid of the big guys.

The fans are NOT happy, even as Lashley jumps McIntyre after the eliminations. A Claymore drops Lashley though and a Glasgow Kiss drops a laughing Rollins before both guys leave. We’re down to Sheamus/Hardy vs. Rollins/Theory/Balor with Sheamus charging into a boot in the corner. That’s enough for Rollins to dive over for the hot tag to Balor, who is quickly powerslammed for two.

Balor is back up with a Sling Blade but the Coup de Grace misses, setting up the Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin. Theory is right in for a heck of a dropkick and it’s Rollins coming back in for a chinlock. After a pretty good while, Sheamus powers up and brings Hardy in to clean house.

Everything breaks down with Sheamus playing Matt Hardy for a springboard splash to the other two in the corner. That’s enough for Sheamus and Hardy to hit stereo ten forearms to the chest, followed by White Noise to Rollins. Everything breaks down again and Rollins pulls Hardy off the apron, leaving Theory to roll Sheamus up for the elimination. That leaves us with Hardy vs. Rollins/Theory…but Sheamus decks Theory before he leaves….and then does it to Hardy too.

Rollins is fine enough to get the tag and hit a frog splash for two on Hardy as we settle in to the beating. Theory takes Hardy up top but gets knocked down, setting up the Swanton for the pin. Rollins isn’t happy and glares at Hardy, who grabs a rollup for two. A hard forearm to the back of the head gets two on Hardy but the Twist of Fate drops Rollins. The Swanton hits raised knees though and the Stomp gives Rollins the final pin at 29:55.

Rating: B. It was a fun, hard hitting match, but the Raw vs. Smackdown lineups continue to feel so worthless. They might as well do a Lethal Lottery format and you would get the same result. The good thing is that the talent is here and can make a match like this work, but the format desperately needs to change to make it more interesting.

Raw – 2
Smackdown – 1

WWE did some charity stuff in Harlem.

Vince McMahon arrived earlier and got a big reception from a bunch of the wrestlers. Then he pulled out a gold egg, because cross promotion.

Classic Rock Moment: recreating the Montreal Screwjob a year later at Survivor Series 1998.

Roman Reigns comes in to see Vince McMahon, who shows him the egg. That’s Cleopatra’s egg, which was given to him by the Rock. Apparently it’s worth $100 million dollars, which Reigns says is as much as his next contract. And that’s it.

The Rock 25th Anniversary Battle Royal

Shanky, Commander Azeez, T-Bar, Robert Roode, Angel, Humberto, Shelton Benjamin, Sami Zayn, R-Truth, Cedric Alexander, Montez Ford, Jinder Mahal, Dolph Ziggler, Cesaro, Otis, Mansoor, Drew Gulak, Erik, Chad Gable, Ivar, Apollo Crews, Omos, AJ Styles, Ricochet, Angelo Dawkins

The Street Profits come to the ring with a bunch of Pizza Hut. Nothing wrong with a sponsorship. Cole and Graves get pizza but Saxton is denied, as he should be. Styles bails to the floor and stands on the announcers’ table as everyone else fights for the smart move of the night. Gulak and Benjamin are out to start with Humberto following them. Truth heads outside to get some pizza, which he offers to Omos and Otis.

The latter takes it before throwing Truth out and going after Omos. Otis doesn’t last long and Gable armbars Cesaro over the rope. That’s broken up and Cesaro knocks Gable out and T-Bar is dropkicked to the floor by Ricochet. The fans want pizza but have to settle for Alexander and Garza being tossed out. There goes Erik and Ivar at the hands of Shanky, because the potential is in Shanky instead of the Viking Raiders. Omos gets rid of Shanky with ease and Roode catapults Mansoor out.

Roode and Ziggler go after Omos and the giant gets rid of Roode, leaving Styles to Phenomenal Forearm Ziggler for the elimination. Zayn tries to rally the remaining Smackdown names but yells at Ricochet, leaving Ford and Dawkins to toss him out. Omos gets rid of Azeez, who pulls Styles out despite Omos’ protests. Crews is out next and we’re down to Omos, Dawkins, Ford, Cesaro and Ricochet. Cesaro rallies the troops to go after Omos, earning himself an elimination. There go Dawkins and Ford, leaving us with Ricochet vs. Omos. That doesn’t last long either as Omos tosses him out for the win at 10:38.

Rating: C. This was ALL about Omos, who threw out about half of the field and dominated throughout. It worked for Andre and even if Omos isn’t quite there, it was a nice performance. Omos is someone who works well in this kind of a spot, even if this had absolutely NOTHING to do with the Rock.

Raw – 3
Smackdown – 1

Post match Styles goes for the pizza but Ford kicks him in the head and throws it into the crowd.

Classic Rock Moment: winning the 2000 Royal Rumble, even if Big Show really won.

We look at the pre-show match.

RKBro (Raw) vs. Usos (Smackdown)

Riddle starts fast with an armbar attempt on Jimmy but gets stacked up for two and the break. A headbutt just makes Riddle mad and he grabs a spinning gutwrench suplex to send Jey flying. Orton comes in and we hear about his hear in Ohio Valley Wrestling for a bit of a rarity. The threat of an RKO sends Jimmy bailing to the floor so it’s off to Jey, who stomps Orton down in the corner.

That just earns Jey a punch to the nose (simple, yet effective) and a trip to the floor, allowing Riddle to hit the springboard Floating Bro. A drop onto the barricade cuts Riddle off though and it’s back to Jimmy for the suicide dive. We slow things down a bit with Jey hammering away in the corner until Riddle manages a kick to the head. That’s way too soon for a hot tag to Orton though and Jimmy is back in with a chinlock.

Riddle fights up and manages a Bro To Sleep (which doesn’t make anything close to full contact), allowing Orton to come back in to clean house. Snap powerslams drop the Usos and Jey gets belly to back dropped onto the announcers’ table. Not to be outdone, Jimmy gets the same as McAfee is losing it even more than usual. Back in and the hanging DDT hits Jey but he’s fine enough to block the RKO.

Riddle is up again and kicks Jey in the head before nailing Jimmy with a running forearm. Jey manages to kick Riddle down for two and the pop up Samoan drop gets two. There’s a superkick to Riddle and a double superkick to Orton. The double superkick from either side gets two on Riddle, who kicks out and stays rigid for a weird moment. Riddle’s enziguri gets him out of trouble though and Orton gets a blind tag. Jimmy doesn’t notice though and his Superfly Splash is pulled into the RKO to give Orton the pin at 14:48.

Rating: B. Two of the best teams in WWE have a good match when they are given about fifteen minutes on a big stage. Sometimes these things write themselves and that was the case here, as Orton even managed to get in the cool RKO that he hits in these important matches. Another solid match on the show in what shouldn’t be a surprise at all. Now just do it again for the titles.

Raw – 4
Smackdown – 1

Classic Rock Moment: vs. John Cena at Wrestlemania XXVIII. I’d say that counts, though it’s still hard to believe Cena lost.

Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce wait for Vince McMahon in his office. Vince comes back…and the egg is gone. The middle management goons are sent to find out who did it, saying if they don’t find out tonight, Vince will find out himself on Raw.

Video on Xia Li, the Protector, in comic book form. Yeah this was too cool to work and it never went anywhere.

Raw Women vs. Smackdown Women

Raw: Bianca Belair, Rhea Ripley, Liv Morgan, Carmella, Queen Zelina
Smackdown: Sasha Banks, Shayna Baszler, Shotzi, Toni Storm, Natalya

Zelina is still a queen and Ripley is half of the Women’s Tag Team Titles with Nikki Ash, which mean a grand total of nothing (Zelina and Carmella would win them the next night on Raw). Toni Storm (as announced in a completely necessary tweet earlier in the day) starts with Carmella, who drops Storm with a right hand. Hold on though as Carmella hands it off to Zelina before heading outside to put on her protective mask. It takes forever to put the mask on so Carmella has Zelina do it, allowing Storm to grab a rollup for the pin.

Belair and Banks come in for a Wrestlemania rematch but Shotzi tags herself in. A quick backsplash gets two on Belair but she’s right back up to knock Shotzi silly. Belair’s jumping splash gets two so Morgan comes in for a middle rope….uh, something, and a near fall. Natalya comes in for two off a snap suplex and a pinfall reversal sequence gets some near falls each. The step over basement dropkick gives Natalya two more but it’s off to Ripley to freshen things up.

Natalya doesn’t seem to mind and brings Baszler in for a double suplex. The jumping stomp to Baszler’s arm is blocked though and the slugout is on. Ripley has to fight out of an armbar as well as the Kirifuda Clutch, allowing her to stomp on Baszler’s head. Shotzi saves Baszler from the Riptide though and everything breaks down. Ripley breaks out of another choke and it’s a double tag to give us Belair vs. Banks.

Belair tries the power but gets pulled straight into the Bank Statement. That’s broken up so Banks sends her face first into the middle buckle, setting up a tornado DDT for two on Belair. Back up and Zelina tags herself in so Belair launches her at Banks for two more. No one will tag Banks so she has to block Zelina’s Code Red. Banks tags herself in and flips Zelina over into a cutter for the pin. Morgan comes in for a pinfall reversal sequence of her own until Oblivion connects to get rid of Storm.

Baszler comes in to choke Morgan and even kicks Ripley off the apron to prevent a tag (that’s smart). It’s off to Shotzi for a weird looking splash, followed by Banks’ frog splash to eliminate Morgan. Ripley comes in and muscles Banks up for a delayed suplex and a near fall. A missile dropkick sends Banks flying into the corner but Shotzi comes in off a blind tag. Shotzi offers a distraction so Baszler can come in with a knee to the face to pin Ripley, leaving Belair vs. Natalya, Shotzi, Banks and Baszler.

Belair comes in and suplexes Natalya for two before firing off the shoulders in the corner. Baszler’s distraction lets Natalya hit a powerbomb out of the corner for two and it’s off to Banks. Shotzi gets into it with Banks and pulls her to the floor where Banks gets counted out to make it 3-1.

Natalya comes in and Sharpshooters Belair, who rolls Natalya into Baszler for the break. A rollup finishes Natalya to make it 2-1, with Baszler coming in next. The Kirifuda Clutch is countered into a release Glam Slam to get rid of Baszler and it’s Shotzi vs. Belair. Shotzi grabs a choke in the corner and a faceplant drops Belair again. The running hip attack in the ropes gets two on Belair, who sends Shotzi into the corner and hits the KOD for the pin/win at 23:46.

Rating: C-. Well that was ridiculous. The last five minutes of this was Belair doing her best Super Cena impression, as she ran through three people on her own (four if you count getting rid of Banks). The match wasn’t anything special otherwise, as the Belair vs. Banks segment was the only thing worth seeing. This felt long until the ending, when it became one head shaking moment after another. Storm was trying and got a bit of a run, but this was all about making Belair look strong and to say they went overboard would be an understatement.

Raw – 5
Smackdown – 1

Classic Rock Moment: The Rock is at the first Smackdown on FOX and rips on Baron Corbin/hangs out with Becky Lynch.

Paul Heyman knows nothing about the missing egg but thinks those people from BROOKLYN might have had something to do with it. That’s not what he is being asked about though: what about Brock Lesnar’s suspension being lifted soon? Uh, Heyman doesn’t want to talk about that either.

Video on Bobby Lashley.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Big E. Last month, Big E. cashed in Money In The Bank to become the new Raw World Champion. The New Day celebrated because they’re a brotherhood, but Reigns said they were no Bloodline. Reigns broke Woods’ King Of The Ring crown and now it’s time for a clash between World Champions.

Big E. (Raw) vs. Roman Reigns (Smackdown)

Paul Heyman is here too as we hear about their time together in FCW. They fight over a lockup to start with neither getting anywhere, meaning it’s off to another staredown. Big E. shoves him a bit and Reigns bails to the floor, where Heyman lists off some Anoa’i family members at the table. Back in and Reigns hits the jumping clothesline for two before stomping away rather hard.

An elbow drops Reigns and Big E. gets to talk a bit of trash to set up the missed apron splash. Big E. comes up favoring his knee and you know Reigns is happy with that. Back in and the chinlock goes on for a bit until Big E. powers up for the break. You don’t do that to Reigns, who boots Big E. down for two more. Big E. is sent outside again as Reigns is getting frustrated and growling at the crowd. A reversed whip into the steps puts Reigns in trouble for a change and some belly to bellies make it worse back inside.

The Warrior Splash connects but Big E. charges into a Samoan drop for two. Reigns fires off the corner clotheslines until Big E. Rock Bottoms him out of said corner for two of his own. The Stretch Muffler has Reigns in trouble so he powers up into a sitout powerbomb to rock Big E. again. A Rock Bottom gets two more as they’re sticking with the big shots here. Two Superman Punches only keep Big E. down for a few seconds so Reigns hits a third…but Big E. is back up before the spear can even launch.

Reigns is sent to the apron for the spear out to the floor but comes right back in with his own spear (minus through the ropes) for a rather near fall. They take their time getting up, with Reigns talking about how Big E. doesn’t deserve to be here. The guillotine is broken up but Big E. tries another spear through the ropes and gets caught in the choke. Reigns gets it on again back inside, only to muscle Reigns up into the Big Ending for two.

They head outside again, with Big E. fired up this time as he sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table. A posting and ram into the barricade have Reigns in more trouble but he’s fine enough to send Big E. knees first into the steps. A Superman Punch off the steps lets Reigns kick the knee out and hit a spear for the pin at 21:56.

Rating: B. It took some time to get going and could have had a few minutes cut out, but this was a heck of a fight. The problem here though was there was no reason to believe Reigns would lose. Big E. is great, but winning the title via Money in the Bank makes him feel a step beneath Reigns, in addition to the fact that Reigns already feels like a bigger star than anyone else at the moment. Big E. was trying here, but you know Reigns getting pinned is going to be a huge moment, not something in a stand alone show like this one.

Raw – 5
Smackdown – 2

Overall Rating: B-. This show is going to depend on how you look at it. While the wrestling was mostly good, with the main event and men’s Survivor Series match carrying it, the biggest problem is NOTHING HAPPENED. Raw dominated the head to head competition and there was nothing on here that I felt like I needed to see. Reigns is still the unstoppable force and whoever got the red shirts this year had a strong night. What else is there to say about the wrestling with non-existent stakes?

Then you have everything else and it was just sad. The Rock obsession was cool and made sense, but without him actually having anything to do with the show the impact kind of falls apart. I know he’s busy, but if he isn’t going to be there, maybe don’t focus on him so much. The egg stuff was stupid, though I can’t fault WWE for trying to make money and it was relatively short.

Overall, as has been the case for a long time, there was enough good to pretty good action to make the show a decent watch, but there is absolutely nothing from a storyline perspective. The Battle For Brand Supremacy stuff worked for a few years but now WWE has given up on it meaning anything, so why should I care about what they’re doing? Good enough show, but totally unimportant.

Ratings Comparison

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Damian Priest

Original: C+
Redo: C

Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Original: B+
Redo: B+

Raw Men vs. Smackdown Men

Original: B-
Redo: B

Battle Royal

Original: C
Redo: C

Usos vs. RKBro

Original: C+
Redo: B

Smackdown Women vs. Raw Women

Original: C-
Redo: C-

Big E. vs. Roman Reigns

Original: B
Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Oh yeah this is about as similar as it gets.

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2021 (2022 Redo): The Power Of Star Power

Summerslam 2021
Date: August 21, 2021
Location: Allegiant Stadium, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 51,326
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole, Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s time for one of the biggest Summerslams ever, as this is the first major event after the attendance restrictions were lifted after the Coronavirus pandemic. They need a major main event to make that work and that is what they have with John Cena challenging Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. Other than that, we have Bobby Lashley vs. Goldberg for the WWE Title because we must have Goldberg. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Big E. vs. Baron Corbin

Baron’s Happy days weren’t here yet. Some woman from Tik Tok is a guest ring announcer and Big E. doesn’t have his Money In The Bank briefcase as Corbin stole it from him. The rather sad Corbin clutches the briefcase and gets belly to belly suplexed to start. Big E. misses the apron splash though and Corbin is thrilled with the idea of winning via countout.

That doesn’t work so Corbin sends him into the post a few times, setting up the chinlock to keep Big E. down. A chokeslam is countered into a stretch muffler of all things but Corbin slips out and hits Deep Six for two. Corbin heads outside to grab the briefcase, earning himself a ram into the barricade. Back in and the Big Ending is good enough to finish Corbin at 6:31.

Rating: C. Set up a quick story on TV and then pay it off with a fast match here. That’s all you need to do for a Kickoff Show match and seeing the horrible loser take another loss will always work. Things would get better for Corbin soon, while Big E. would wind up having a pretty lame WWE Title reign, though at least he got there.

We’re in Las Vegas so the opening video has a poker theme, which lasts all of a few moments before going into the look at the matches, as expected. Also as expected, John Cena vs. Roman reigns feels way bigger than anything else.

Those stadium shows always look awesome and that is the case again here.

Raw Tag Team Titles: RKBro vs. AJ Styles/Omos

RKBro is challenging after reuniting last week to go after the titles. Orton and Styles start (not a bad choice) with Orton sending him flying with an early suplex. It’s off to Riddle so Styles bails to the floor and assaults the announcers’ table. Back in and Styles hands it off to Omos for the big slam on Riddle. Styles puts the chinlock on but Riddle elbows his way out of the fireman’s carry. That lets Riddle hit a running knee on Omos but Styles is there to cut off a diving tag to Orton.

The comeback is on, including a backdrop to Styles and forearms to Omos. Orton powerslams Styles and, after knocking Omos off the apron, hits the hanging DDT. Omos saves Styles from the RKO though and then chokeslams Riddle onto the apron. Riddle is back up with a posting for Omos but Styles is back with a moonsault from the apron into a reverse DDT to drop Riddle hard. Back in and Styles blocks the RKO, only to get caught with the second attempt to give Orton the pin and the titles at 7:05.

Rating: C+. The match wasn’t quite a classic but it makes perfect sense to put this on first. The fans loved RKBro and letting them have their big win was going to get the show started in the right direction. Styles and Omos were fine for a pretty nice title reign, but you’re only going to get so much out of that. Good choice for the opener here and Orton getting some focus is almost always a good thing.

Riddle being so freaking happy over the win is a great thing.

We recap Alexa Bliss vs. Eva Marie, which is over Bliss’ doll Lillie being all evil. Eva wanted Doudrop to go after Bliss but she was scared of the doll, meaning Eva and Doudrop aren’t in a great place coming in.

Eva Marie vs. Alexa Bliss

Doudrop is here with Marie. Sign in the crowd: “Eva Marie is worse than an airport tuna sandwich.” Points for creative, which cancels out the negative points for the massive CGI Lillie doll. During the entrance, we get a quick look at Lillie being able to sit up and wink, because of course she can. Bliss dodges a few charges to start and Eva falls out to the floor.

Back in and Bliss elbows her in the face as they’re going in very slow motion to start. Eva gets in a few shots but stops to slap Lillie, who she also uses to slap Bliss. That’s enough to send Bliss into a rage for some bad right hands, setting up a flipping splash for two. Doudrop insists that she believe in Eva as Lillie is sat back on top. Bliss sends her into the corner but misses Twisted Bliss to give Eva two. Back up and Bliss hits a DDT (which Marie falls too soon on) for the pin at 3:50. Doudrop seems well pleased.

Rating: D-. This was one of those matches that would have felt like a bad filler on Raw, let alone getting time on one of the biggest shows of the year. Eva was brought back in for star power but then she has a match like this and so much of it is dropped out the window. Bliss was better, but the Lillie stuff was killing her and that was getting more and more obvious every week.

Post match Doudrop makes sure to announce Eva as the loser of the match.

Mario Lopez, in a swank Hart Foundation shirt, brings in RKBro with Randy Orton promising that it is going to be smooths ailing for the team going forward. He’s still getting used to the Bro name though. Riddle has a surprise for him on Raw too, which would wind up being a scooter (with tassels).

United States Title: Sheamus vs. Damian Priest

Priest is challenging after beating Sheamus in a non-title match, where he re-injured Sheamus’ nose (hence a protective mask). Sheamus headlocks him down to start before switching into a hammerlock. Back up and Priest rocks him with a right hand before muscling him up for the Broken Arrow. Sheamus is sent outside so there’s the running step up flip dive to take him out again.

Priest’s spin kick is countered and he gets sent hard into the post, meaning it’s time to slow down a bit. A belly to back suplex sets up a chinlock but Priest is right back up. That works for Sheamus, who plants him with the Irish Curse and stops to pose. Priest powers out of another chinlock and hurricanranas his way out of a powerbomb, only to get powerslammed for two more.

Back up and Sheamus stops to check his hair, allowing Priest to get in a running tornado DDT but his back seems to be flaring up. The back is fine enough to hit a top rope spinwheel kick but Sheamus snaps him throat first across the top to break up a…..something. A top rope clothesline into an Alabama Slam gives Sheamus two and frustration is setting in.

The Brogue Kick is countered with a kick to the head though and Priest grabs South Of Heaven for two more. Sheamus knees him out of the air for two of his own and it’s off to a heel hook of all things. Priest fights up and rips off the mask, allowing him to hammer away. A kick to the face sets up the Reckoning to give Priest the pin and the title at 13:49.

Rating: B-. That’s the kind of big time fight that you need to have in a spot like this and they did the right thing with the ending. Priest took every big thing that Sheamus had and then won clean with his finisher. WWE set Priest up in the last few months and then paid him off with a win here, which is what you’re supposed to do. Nicely done.

We recap Dominik Mysterio causing issues for his dad, because they have literally been teasing this split for over a year now.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Mysterios

The Usos are defending. Rey hammers on Jimmy to start but it’s too early for the 619. The Usos are both sent outside with Rey hitting the sliding splash, followed by a springboard dive from Dominik. Dominik comes in for Three Amigos to Jimmy but Jey breaks up the frog splash with a shove out to the floor. The top rope Demolition Decapitator hits Dominik for no cover and Jimmy adds a running headbutt for two.

Dominik tries to fight out of the corner and gets BLASTED with an uppercut to drop him again. Jey hits Two Amigos and stops to pose before shouting some Spanish. A neckbreaker gets Dominik out of trouble though and there’s the hot tag to Mysterio to start cleaning house.

The tornado DDT gets two on Jimmy and the top rope seated senton puts him down again. Everything breaks down and it’s a superkick into the Superfly Splash for two on Rey. Dominik is back in and gets dropped on the apron like the schmuck that he is. Jimmy misses another Superfly Splash but he raises his knees to block a frog splash. The double superkick sets up the Superfly Splash to retain the titles at 10:48.

Rating: C+. The Usos and Rey managed to overcome Dominik’s extreme level of bleh to have a decent match. The Usos are able to have a pretty good match against anyone and that is what they did again here. It’s a rematch from another recent title change so there was only so much interest, but that has been the chance for either Tag Team Titles for years now.

Actress Tiffany Haddish introduces the new National Champion Damian Priest, who doesn’t like bullies. He likes being the UNITED STATES Champion though.

Rick Boogs plays new Intercontinental Champion Rick Boogs to the ring, allowing Pat McAfee to dance on the announcers’ table.

We recap Sasha Banks vs. Bianca Belair for the latter’s Smackdown Women’s Title. Belair beat her at Wrestlemania to win the title so Banks left (as she does) and then came back for a rematch. However, there were rumors that Banks wasn’t cleared to wrestle so things might be up in the air.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Hold on though as Banks isn’t cleared to compete (right) so we have a replacement.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Carmella

Belair is….hang on a second.

BECKY LYNCH IS BACK beats the heck out of Carmella, meaning we have a replacement (again).

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Becky Lynch

Belair is defending and it’s a right hand into the Manhandle Slam to make Lynch champion at 25 seconds.

And for those you keeping track, had it been Banks vs. Belair, it would indeed be the same story for Belair at back to back Summerslams.

WWE is going back to Saudi Arabia and yes, it’s amazing, mainly because they’ve been well paid to say so.

Tamyra Mensah-Stock and Gable Steveson, Olympic gold medal winners in wrestling, are here for a nice presentation.

We get the same WWE Shop commercial for the third time in less than two hours.

Drew McIntyre vs. Jinder Mahal

Mahal cost Drew Money in the Bank so tonight it’s about revenge with Mahal’s goons barred from ringside. McIntyre drives him into the corner to start and hits a quick clothesline, followed by the toss suplex. A trip to the floor goes badly for Mahal as well, so McIntyre throws him back inside for some begging. Mahal brings up their previous friendship before getting in a superkick for two. The chinlock doesn’t do much to McIntyre so it’s the Glasgow Kiss into a series of overhead belly to belly suplexes. The Futureshock into the Claymore finishes Mahal at 4:36.

Rating: D+. Yeah what were you expecting here? Mahal has long since stopped meaning anything so having McIntyre beat him without much trouble was the only way to go. That’s what they did here and it was a fine way to go, albeit in a bad match. You can only get so much out of a match that is this one sided though and that’s what brought this down.

Post match Veer and Shanky come to the ring to go after McIntyre, who chases them off with the sword.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match, with new champion Nikki Ash defending against Charlotte and Rhea Ripley. Nikki cashed in Money in the Bank on Charlotte, who had been beaten down by Ripley. Tonight it’s time to crush Nikki once and for all, because she has been treated like a loser since she won the title in the first place, because A, Charlotte and B, it’s a really stupid gimmick.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley vs. Nikki Ash

Nikki is defending and, after some Big Match Intros, gets shoved down by Charlotte to start. The monkey flip takes Charlotte down and a rollup gets two on Ripley. Back up and Charlotte tosses Nikki out, leaving Ripley to shoulder Charlotte into the corner. Nikki comes back in so Charlotte can beat up both of them at once, including slamming Ash onto Ripley for the double stack.

The moonsault hits Ripley’s raised boot though, leaving Nikki to counter Riptide into a crossbody for two. Charlotte and Ripley mess up something so Charlotte hits a big boot for two of her own. Nikki is sent outside and another big boot sends Ripley outside. A tornado DDT drops Charlotte to give Nikki two but Ripley is back in to German suplex both of them at once.

Ripley’s missile dropkick gets two on Charlotte, leaving Ripley with the stunned kickout face. Charlotte and Ripley brawl to the floor for the slugout until Nikki dives onto both of them for no reaction. Back in and Ripley and Ash go for a double suplex on Charlotte, who counters into a double DDT, then knocks them both outside (because of course she does). Charlotte corkscrew moonsaults onto both of them, with Ash being driven HARD into the barricade.

Ripley finally gets in a big boot on Charlotte and Prism Traps Nikki, only to have Charlotte break it up again. The Prism Trap to Charlotte is countered into the Figure Eight but Nikki dives off the top for the save. Nikki hits the Reckoning for two on Charlotte with Ripley making a save this time. The Riptide is countered into a DDT to send Ripley outside and this isn’t looking good for Nikki. A high crossbody misses for Nikki and Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight to get the title back at 13:03.

Rating: C+. While it’s an entertaining match, this made me mad last year and it’s doing it again here. Nikki might as well have been a lamb led to the slaughter here, as Ripley looks like a killer and Charlotte looks like a star, while Nikki looks like a mascot of a low rent kids’ birthday party place. Throw in Charlotte being booked like a train here and then getting Nikki to tap in the end and this was ALL about Charlotte, as is far too often the case anytime she’s around. Nikki being called ALMOST A Superhero was bad enough, but then she’s just a meal for Charlotte, like so many others have been over the years.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Edge. Rollins cost Edge the universal Title against Roman Reigns last month, which is apparently tied to a moment in 2014, when the Shield teased attacking Edge and almost wiped him out. Now Edge knows that if Rollins hits the Curb Stomp, his career is probably over. I’m not sure how good of a feud it was, but Edge facing someone new is a fun thing to see.

Edge vs. Seth Rollins

I almost didn’t recognize Rollins without his Freakin. Edge comes out with a hybrid Brood/Metalingus theme for a pretty awesome moment. Feeling out process to start with Edge grabbing a headlock and then knocking Rollins to the floor for some frustration. Back in and Rollins forearms away but gets backdropped right back over the top for a crash. Edge sends him back inside and then outside again but this time Rollins drives him into the post.

A trip into the steps makes it worse and Rollins grabs a neckbreaker for two back inside. Rollins hits a Sling Blade but Edge is smart enough to go to the ropes before the Stomp can launch. Yet another neckbreaker is countered though and Edge grabs a flapjack for a breather. Rollins is able to knock him off the top, setting up a heck of a frog splash for two. Another Stomp attempt is avoided so they go up top at the same time, with Edge grabbing a super swinging neckbreaker (which would seem to hurt them both equally).

It’s Edge up first with a big boot and the Edgecution for two, leaving him a bit frustrated this time. The Edge-O-Matic is good for the same but Rollins suplexes him down. Another Stomp misses so Edge grabs a Glam Slam for two (nice touch). Edge has to avoid another Stomp and sends Rollins into the post, setting up a spear through the ropes and out to the floor for the crash.

Rollins is driven into the apron and the screen (because there’s a screen) is knocked out to give Edge two more. The spear is countered into the Pedigree (how Rollins beat Roman Reigns one day) for another near fall, meaning it’s Rollins being stunned this time. With nothing on the ground working, Rollins goes up top for the Phoenix splash, only to get speared down for another near fall.

With nothing else working, Rollins just hits him in the back of the neck, setting up a basement superkick to the back of the head. Rollins goes for the Stomp yet again but gets reversed into the Edgecator of all things, with Edge letting go to switch into the Crossface. Edge rams him face first into the mat and makes it a Crossface sleeper for the tap at 21:14.

Rating: B. They beat each other up for a long time until Edge got him in the end. The story here centered around the Stomp and it was a logical way to go given the buildup from that 2014 segment. That being said, going off a segment from seven years ago that wasn’t so interesting in the first place and it was a weird build to get there. Good match, but the road there could have been better.

Money In The Bank is in a football stadium next year. Gee that’s a quick turnaround for the same stadium but I’m sure nothing will go wrong.

Tonight’s attendance of 51,326 is officially announced.

Earlier tonight, John Morrison and Miz drove a water truck into the stadium.

Here are Miz and John Morrison for a chat. They’re ready to soak everyone….but Morrison has forgotten the Drip Stick 2000s. Miz doesn’t have them either, so here is Xavier Woods with the Drip Stick 2000 (a water cannon with a water tank attached). Woods is told he’s outnumbered but he does a survey (as part of his weird NWO tribute phase) and then sprays both of them down. And that’s it, as the crowd was SILENT during this.

We recap Goldberg vs. Bobby Lashley for the WWE Title. Goldberg showed up as a challenger (as he tends to do) and the match was made, but then Lashley and MVP went after Goldberg’s son Gage (who looked like he would rather be having his teeth pulled out than be here) to make it personal. In other words, it’s a battle of the spears because WWE thinks that is the most amazing idea ever.

Raw World Title: Goldberg vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley, with MVP, is defending. After the Big Match Intros, they go with the power off to start, with Goldberg hitting a flying shoulder and a World’s Strongest Slam. Back up and Lashley knocks him down with a hard shot of his own. Neither can hit a Jackhammer though so Lashley gets in some shots to the back of the neck. For some reason Lashley goes up top but gets slammed down, meaning MVP needs to offer a distraction.

That’s fine with Goldberg, who hits the spear on the floor to rock Lashley again. With nothing else working, MVP hits Goldberg in the knee with his cane, allowing Lashley to hit a chop block. A spinebuster puts Goldberg down again and he rolls outside for a rather out of character move. Lashley follows and drives the knee into the post twice in a row….which is enough for the referee stoppage at 7:12 as Goldberg can’t stand.

Rating: D+. Yeah it wasn’t awful, but at the same tome it is really hard to find any reason to be interested in Goldberg. All he does is come in, do some lame story, and then get a title match. That wasn’t the case here, and Lashley can only do so much. Nothing to see here, but at least Goldberg is done again for the time being.

Post match Lashley stays on Goldberg with a chair, but Goldberg’s son comes in to jump Lashley. That earns him a Hurt Lock, but MVP points out who it is and Lashley lets him go. Goldberg swears vengeance and covers his son as MVP says Lashley had no way of knowing who that was. BECAUSE THIS NEEDED A REMATCH!

We recap Roman Reigns vs. John Cena for the Universal Title. Reigns has been champion for about a year so now it’s Cena coming in for the dream match. Reigns talked about how Cena never changes (Reigns: “It’s like missionary position EVERY NIGHT!”) but Cena says Reigns has to change every few years because people stop caring. Cena also brought up that all it takes is three seconds to win the title, no matter what Reigns does to him. Oh and if Reigns loses, he’s leaving WWE, because WWE likes to take away any drama they might build up.

Smackdown World Title: John Cena vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns, with Paul Heyman, is defending. Cena comes out first and my goodness you can feel the star power dripping off of him like no one else that you ever see. As a great touch, the screen behind Cena’s entrance shows his sixteen World Titles, including the dates he won them. They take their time before eventually locking up for a standoff. Cena rolls him up for two and points it out to Reigns as the mind games are on.

That doesn’t work for Reigns, who knocks him down and then does it again to make it worse. A snap suplex gives Reigns two and we hit the chinlock. Cena gets tossed outside and there’s the big whip into the steps, allowing Reigns to pose again. Reigns can even stop to pose on the steps with the title but Cena gets in a quick rollup for two (in a great touch because it’s THAT CLOSE to the upset).

A quick AA attempt is countered into a DDT to give Reigns two, allowing him to apologize to movie executives for hurting Cena. Reigns cuts off a comeback attempt with a right hand and says this is easy. Another AA attempt is countered into a sleeper, with Cena powering up to drive him into the corner. Reigns still isn’t impressed, so Cena hits that big running clothesline of his for a needed breather.

Back up and Cena hits the running shoulders into the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is countered into a quickly broken guillotine though, leaving Reigns to hit a Superman Punch to take over again. The spear is cut off with a kick to the face and now the Shuffle connects. There’s the AA for two (with Cole freaking out on commentary to give away the kickout). The STF sends Reigns to the rope for the break so Cena follows him outside, earning himself an apron kick to the face.

Reigns gets a running start but charges into an AA through the announcers’ table for two back inside, leaving Cena frustrated. Cena goes up top but dives into a powerbomb for two and needs to pull himself up in the corner. The spear misses in the corner though and it’s the super AA for two, with the Reigns Leaves If He Loses stipulation being brought up for the first time all match. For some reason Cena tries his own spear but gets kicked in the face. They slug it out with Reigns hitting the Superman Punch into a spear to retain at 23:00.

Rating: B+. This wasn’t the best match in the world, but it was all about the big match atmosphere. That was hitting completely, as Cena knows how to bring the feeling like no one else these days. While it wasn’t likely that Cena was going to win, there was the feeling that it could happen and that’s good enough. Throw in Cena knowing how to do this match just well enough and it felt like a main event worth title match between two titans.

Post match Reigns poses but here is Brock Lesnar, making his first appearance in well over a year. Lesnar circles the ring and then stands on the steps before the staredown sends Reigns backing away. While the feud is tired, this would lead to a heck of a story as Paul Heyman was stuck between the two of them and even switched sides for a few weeks. Anyway, Lesnar poses as reigns and Heyman leave to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Most of the bigger matches clicked well, but there were enough things bringing the rest of the show down. The biggest thing though was the crowd actually being around, as it adds so much to the show. This was a rare situation where Summerslam was a way bigger show than Wrestlemania and the quality was good enough too. The bad parts are pretty bad but the stronger parts of the card carried it over. Solid show, but fast forward some of those weaker points.

Ratings Comparison

Big E. vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C
Redo: C

RKBro vs. AJ Styles/Omos

Original: C+
Redo: C+

Eva Marie vs Alexa Bliss

Original: F
Redo: D-

Sheamus vs. Damian Priest

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Usos vs. Mysterios

Original: C-
Redo: C+

Becky Lynch vs. Bianca Belair

Original: N/A
Redo: N/A

Jinder Mahal vs. Drew McIntyre

Original: D+
Redo: D+

Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte vs. AJ Styles

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Seth Rollins vs. Edge

Original: B+
Redo: B

Bobby Lashley vs. Goldberg

Original: D+
Redo: D+

John Cena vs. Roman Reigns

Original: A-
Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: C+
Redo: B-

Mostly the same here, though some of the bad stuff pulled the original down a bit.

Here is the original review if you’re interested:

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2013 (2019 Redo): It Still Works

Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,739
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s a double main event tonight with a pair of smaller guys vs. big powerhouses with CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar and Daniel Bryan challenging John Cena for the World Title. This is remembered as one of the best shows in a very long time for WWE and it should be interesting to see how well it holds up. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: United States Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Rob Van Dam

Ambrose is defending and there’s no Shield with him to start. Some standing switches go nowhere and Ambrose continues to look moderately displeased by the whole thing at worst. Rob is right back up with a spinning kick to the chest, meaning he can hit those finger pokes. You don’t do that to Ambrose, who chops away in the corner and stops a charging Rob with a kick to the face.

The neck crank goes on, followed by a running dropkick against the ropes to keep Rob in trouble. It’s back to the chinlock with the microphones picking up the spot calling. Rob is right back up with a kick to the face and the split legged moonsault out of the corner for two. A kick to the head breaks up the original Dirty Deeds (headlock driver) but here are Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins. That brings out Mark Henry and Big Show and we take a break. Back with everyone standing at ringside and Dean dropping an elbow for two. The ECW chants bring Rob back to life but Dean sends him outside.

That means a staredown between the four on the floor with Rob managing a suplex on Dean. The spinning kick to the back on the apron has Dean in even more trouble and it’s a top rope cannonball for two back inside. Dean is right back with a spinebuster for two of his own but misses his top rope elbow. Rob has to go after Rollins instead of trying the Five Star so he kicks Dean down again. The Five Star connects but Roman Reigns comes in with a spear for the DQ at 13:40.

Rating: B-. This worked rather well and is one of Van Dam’s last good matches either in WWE or anywhere for that matter. He looked like his old self here and made Ambrose look good, even when he got the DQ win. This was still before Shield had reached their peak and they were far better as a team anyway. It got the crowd going and happened to be a good match in the process. Not bad for the Kickoff.

Here’s the Miz as your host for the evening. His task at the moment: tell us about the main events we already know. How TNA of him. We’re about to hear our first match but Fandango and Summer Rae cut him off with some dancing. Miz: “Really? Really? WELCOME TO SUMMERSLAM!”

The opening video focuses on Los Angeles and how big things happen here. Like Summerslam. That’s a nice motif and it moves into the double main event, which is indeed sounding great. Future note: the music during this video would become Akira Tozawa’s theme (not sure if that’s a Network edit or not).

Dig that pyro. Seriously with all the money they have, we can only get it at Wrestlemania and the Saudi shows?

Jojo from Total Divas sings the National Anthem. This was a plot point on Total Divas because that she needed to stretch for plot points.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

This is a Ring of Fire match, meaning an Inferno match with pins and submissions only. It’s also Bray’s in-ring debut, which is almost weird to imagine. Harper and Rowan are in Wyatt’s corner, as tends to be the case. The bell rings and the flames come up, going all of six inches high. Kane slugs away to start and the flames do go higher as someone lands on the mat.

Harper and Rowan get closer to the ring and the flames go WAY up to make things look a lot better. Kane hits a suplex to pop the flames again and avoids a big boot, sending Bray close to the fire. Bray’s running splash in the corner connects and he hammers away as the fans aren’t exactly thrilled so far. Back up and Kane sends him into the corner and the side slam makes the flames go up again. The chokeslam is broken up and Harper tries to throw in a kendo stick but the flames cut it off.

Cue the fireman to put the stick out, allowing Kane to hit the chokeslam. Rowan grabs the fire extinguisher to try and put out the flames but they come right back up as Kane hits another chokeslam. For some reason there’s no cover so Kane hits a third chokeslam, meaning it’s Tombstone time. Hold on again though as Harper and Rowan put a blanket over the flames and get in for the beatdown. The fans want Undertaker but settle for Sister Abigail to finish Kane at 7:49.

Rating: F. Well that was dumb. You have Wyatt getting destroyed until the goons saved him, the flames not lasting seven minutes before someone figured a way around them, and the match being dreadful until the ending. Pick two of them and you can figure out what was wrong with this one. It was a good idea on paper but the execution was a nightmare, which sums up Wyatt’s whole career.

Post match Wyatt puts on his hat and sits in the rocking chair as Harper and Rowan put Kane’s head on the steps. They pick up the other steps and crush his head for the big knockout, which looked better than most of the match. Harper and Rowan carry Kane out.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about the Wyatt Family.

On the Kickoff Show, Paul Heyman talked about how the real story of David vs. Goliath is that Goliath took the best shot and then destroyed David. Heyman has gotten both sides to agree that tonight can be No DQ so Lesnar can finish Punk for good.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Sandow is Mr. Money in the Bank and cost Cody the briefcase to break up their team. Before the match, Sandow talks about how there have been great pairings throughout literary history, with each pair having a lackey. Tonight, Sandow proves that he was the leader by sending Cody back to the land of clowns. Cody starts fast and hammers away before getting two off a backdrop. Sandow is right back with a suplex and a double arm crank as this is already feeling like a TV match.

An early Cross Rhodes attempt is blocked and Sandow hits the Russian legsweep into the wind-up elbow for two. Something like Edge’s Edgecation goes on but Cody kicks away without much effort. Cody catches him on top with a MuscleBuster of all things and that gets the fans into things for a change. A missile dropkick gives Cody two more and the Disaster Kick knocks Sandow silly for another two. Cody misses a charge into the post to give Sandow two but Cody snaps off Cross Rhodes for the pin at 6:39.

Rating: D. This was a case where Cody should have won the briefcase and moved up to the World Title scene but instead they went with Sandow and the whole thing flopped because no one bought him in that spot. Maybe they were planning on having Cody take the briefcase from him, but the damage was already done. It’s a case of putting too much thought into things as WWE screwed up something else.

We recap Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio for the Smackdown World Title. Alberto had put Christian on the shelf late last year and now Christian is the challenger of the month. Actually saying this is recapping Christian vs. Alberto is a little misleading as Alberto is neither seen nor mentioned in the video. I know he’s not interesting but come on now.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio

Alberto is defending. They circle each other a few times until a loud kick to the leg has Christian in trouble. A headlock doesn’t do much for the champ as Christian comes back up with a right hand and a toss over the ropes. Back in and Christian gets caught on top for the running enziguri into the running kicks to the chest. It’s time to go to the arm, as tends to be Del Rio’s style.

The armbar doesn’t last long so Del Rio throws him into the air for the big crash to the mat. A top rope double stomp to the arm gets two but Del Rio misses a charge and goes crashing out to the floor. That lets Christian hit a dive off the top and they’re both down. Back in and Del Rio goes right back to the arm, because it’s a plan that works well. He deviates from said plan by going up and diving into raised boots though, allowing Christian to hammer away in the corner.

The high crossbody gets two on the champ but the Killswitch is countered into a Backstabber. Another running enziguri in the corner rocks Christian for two more but he’s fine enough to hit a middle rope elbow to the jaw. A super hurricanrana gives Christian another two and it’s time for the spear.

Since the idea of selling Christian’s spear makes anyone cringe, Del Rio dropkicks him in the face for two instead. There’s a low superkick for another two, with the fans dubbing this awesome. Eh…..it’s close but I don’t know about that. Christian hits the spear out of nowhere but the arm is banged up, allowing Del Rio to slap on the armbreaker for the tap at 12:29.

Rating: B. I can’t go all the way to awesome but this was a rather fun match with Christian throwing everything he had. That being said, I wasn’t buying a lot of the near falls as Christian never hit the Killswitch and Del Rio never won with anything but the armbreaker. Christian’s career was more or less done at this point, as he would be put out of action again in a few months and have his last comeback with his final match in March.

Post match Del Rio says he’ll be the hero Los Angeles needs. Someone get this man a big bus!

Video on Summerslam Axxess earlier in the day, complete with a women’s tag match including Marina Menunos.

Maria is here and talks about the Bella Twins freaking out about Maria saying Natalya did well on Total Divas. Cue Fandango and Summer Rae to dance but Maria and Miz do just the same, leaving Fandango and Summer looking annoyed.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

Cameron, Naomi, Eva Marie and Nikki Bella are here because this is the Total Divas match of the night. It’s weird seeing Natalya in regular gear instead of the leather she’s worn for years now. You can tell this is serious as they exchanged SLAPS on Raw. They fight over failed hiptoss attempts to start and it’s time for another slapoff. Brie has to bail to the floor to avoid the Sharpshooter so Nikki and Eva get in some cheating to take Natalya to the floor. The fans chant for JBL instead of this mess before quickly shifting over to the other announcers. Or maybe it’s an old Jerry Graham fan club.

Brie grabs the chinlock as the fans want tables. Egads the idea of the Total Divas crew trying to do something that complicated. The chinlock goes on again because that’s their best idea at the moment. Natalya fights out without much trouble but the Sharpshooter is countered with a rollup into the corner. The other four get in a fight on the floor and it’s a THIRD CHINLOCK in less than five minutes. Natalya breaks it up and, with the fans saying they want Ryder, slaps on the Sharpshooter for the win at 5:21.

Rating: D-. Any match that involves three chinlocks in less than five minutes is pretty self explanatory. There was no story here other than they were arguing about a reality show and that’s enough to get us here. The wrestling was pretty awful with the talented Natalya not being good enough to carry Brie. At least it was short, but this really had no business being on Summerslam.

Ryback, currently a bully, yells at catering about the soup being cold. It’s supposed to be, which Ryback knew of course. The soup goes down the chef’s shirt and then over his head. Ryback: “Feed me moron.” Make sure you catch his podcast so he can tell you how he came up with that entire idea and how it would have been a classic if WWE supported him.

We recap CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar. Punk was about to win Money in the Bank but Paul Heyman turned on him because Punk was nothing without him. Heyman brought Lesnar back in to destroy Punk, who had been Heyman’s friend and client for a long time. It’s a pretty easy tagline: The Best vs. The Beast. This was better than the UFC version: Former UFC Heavyweight Champion vs. The Miserable Failure.

CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar

No DQ. I know I say this a lot, but a fired up Lesnar is a terrifying human being. Punk shrugs off the shoulders in the corner to start so Lesnar just does them again. The CM PUNK chants begin and you can feel the energy in this one. A heck of a beal across the ring rocks Punk and it’s time for some choking in the corner. Punk manages a kick to the head and Lesnar is rocked, followed by some running knees to put him outside.

The suicide dive connects as I can’t help but look for the baseball sized growth on his back (it’s just hard not to). Punk tries the steps but Brock knocks them right back into him without much effort. Lesnar posts himself though and Punk scores with a top rope dive to stagger him again. The clothesline off the announcers’ table connects as well but Punk makes the mistake of going after Heyman. Lesnar LAUNCHES him over the table and Cole is declaring this one over already.

Back in and Punk starts kicking at the leg so Lesnar hits him in the face (don’t make it complicated). The bearhug stays on the ribs as you can’t fault Lesnar’s plan. Punk’s escape plan: hit Lesnar in the face. See? He’s learning too. Lesnar goes right back to the ribs and the slow pace continues. Another bearhug goes on and gets broken up by more shots to the face. Punk kicks him in the ribs and goes up, only to dive into a World’s Strongest Slam (giving us a great OH DANG IT face).

Some backbreakers get two as Punk’s ribs are being destroyed and we hit the chinlock. Punk bites the ear to escape and starts striking away, setting up a top rope knee to the face to FINALLY put Lesnar down. Some running knees in the corner connect and a kick to the head sets up the Macho Elbow (almost a splash) for a hot two. The GTS and F5 are both countered so Punk kicks him in the head again.

Another GTS attempt is countered into the Kimura but that’s reversed into a triangle choke. You just don’t do that to a power guy like Lesnar though, as he turns it over into a powerbomb….which doesn’t break anything. Lesnar powers up again though, this time into a heck of a running powerbomb for the real break. The delayed cover gets two and a ticked off Lesnar rolls some suplexes for two more.

Lesnar takes his sweet time going outside so Punk can get up top for a dive. That’s blocked by a raised chair, but Punk still drives it into Lesnar at the same time. That means Punk can beat the heck out of Lesnar with the chair and it’s Punk getting fired up this time. Back in and Punk hits him low, meaning it’s time to go up top for the Macho Elbow with the chair. Lesnar can’t get up (that’s a rare shot) so Punk hits him again, leaving Heyman to take the chair.

Brock is back up and grabs the F5 but Punk grabs Heyman’s tie for the block. Punk slips out and hits the GTS with Heyman having to make a save. The chase is on and Punk runs into the F5, which is countered into a DDT for two. The Anaconda Vice goes on, but since Lesnar’s legs aren’t kicking you know it’s not a finish. Heyman tries to come in with a chair….but Punk steps onto it. A right hand drops Heyman and Punk puts him in the Vice (like an idiot). Lesnar gets in the chair shot to Punk and the F5 onto the chair is good for the pin at 25:17.

Rating: A. Oh I loved this one all over again. The one part holding it back was Heyman getting involved once too often and Punk getting stupid by putting him in the Vice (he’s way too smart to get that caught up no matter what). Other than that, this was an incredible display of the underdog (who happens to be a multiple time World Champion) going after the unbeatable monster and getting dangerously close to stopping him. I was getting into the near falls here and that says a lot given that I knew how it was ending. Awesome stuff and the blueprint for how to have a smaller guy fight Lesnar.

Punk gets the big hero’s sendoff in what would be his last great match.

A fan took a Mark Henry splash for Summerslam tickets. I’d do it too. The fan and his friends will be ringside for the next match.

Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn vs. Big E. Langston/AJ Lee

Langston and Lee turned on Ziggler so he got Kaitlyn, who lost the Divas Title to AJ, on his side for this. It’s so strange seeing Big E. as his old self. The guys start and Big E. goes straight to an abdominal stretch to take over. It’s already off to the women with AJ kicking Kaitlyn in the face for two. The sleeper on Kaitlyn’s back keeps things slow and we look at the fans eating Doritos (sponsor).

Kaitlyn fights up and brings Ziggler back in for the dropkick and rapid fire elbow drops to Big E. Since they’re just elbows, Big E. is right back up with an over the shoulder backbreaker for two with Kaitlyn making the save. A hard running shoulder in the corner only hits post, leaving Kaitlyn to hit a heck of a spear to AJ on the floor (AJ always sold that perfectly). Big E. is fine enough to try the Big Ending but Ziggler reverses into the Zig Zag for the pin at 6:45.

Rating: D+. This was nothing but a way to let the crowd calm down a bit after the instant classic and there’s nothing wrong with being in that spot. Kaitlyn’s spear looked awesome and it was always cool to see Big E. throwing humans around like they were toys. The Ziggler push was already dying around this time but somehow he would still be kicking around in big spots six years later. WWE is funny/stupid in that way.

Fandango interrupts Miz one more time so Miz lays him out. Cole: “It’s Fan-DOWN-Go.” No Cole, it isn’t.

The Kickoff Panel does what Kickoff Panels do. In this case that means picking Daniel Bryan to beat John Cena for the title.

We recap Cena vs. Bryan. Cena was given the chance to pick his challenger for this show and selected Bryan, who had worked his way up the card like few others in recent years. Management hated the idea because Bryan wasn’t good enough and tried to give Bryan a corporate makeover. Bryan refused to cut his beard though because he was going to be himself. HHH, who has seemed to favor Bryan, is guest referee. Bryan and Cena have played up the sports entertainment vs. wrestling deal, which is exactly what this match should be about.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is challenging with HHH as guest referee. Cena is also sporting a massive growth on his elbow, which was leaving him desperately in need of surgery because it’s the size of a baseball. Bryan isn’t getting the superstar pops yet but he’s cheered more than Cena. We get the Big Match Intros and I had forgotten about Bryan’s THE BEARD IS HERE shirt. Cena grabs a headlock to start as they have a ton of time here.

Bryan rolls out with no trouble and it’s an early standoff. Back up and Cena tries a test of strength, which is blocked by a bridge. The YES Lock attempt sends Cena bailing to the floor and he tells the doctor that his arm is fine. Back in and Bryan takes him down into the surfboard knee stomp as Cena is in way over his head with the wrestling. Therefore, he runs Bryan over for a knock to the floor because power is his best bet. Cena follows him outside but gets sent into the steps, only to manage a suplex off the steps to put Bryan down again.

Back in and Cena whips him hard into the corner as Bryan has no answer for the power game just yet. A Batista Bomb gives Cena two and the chinlock goes on. Bryan fights up and forearms away, setting up some kicks in the corner to put Cena on defense again. The running clothesline drops Cena and you can feel the fans’ energy picking up. The YES Kicks connect but, as usual, the big one misses and Cena fires off the shoulders.

Cena takes too long with the Shuffle though and gets kicked in the head, only to come back with the ProtoBomb. Now the Shuffle connects but the AA doesn’t work just yet. Instead Bryan hits a missile dropkick for two as they’re going back and forth very well here. Over ten minutes in, Bryan finally goes after the BIG FREAKING BULGE on his arm to take over. Cena tries the STF but Bryan kicks away and grabs one of his own. The rope is grabbed so Bryan hits a pair of German suplexes for a pair of twos.

Now it’s off to the YES Lock but Cena slips out, earning himself a guillotine choke instead. That’s countered with a backdrop into the corner (cool) and they’re both down for a second. Cena grabs the AA out of nowhere for two and they’re down a bit longer. With nothing working, Cena goes up but Bryan catches him with the running forearms to stagger him. Bryan superplexes him down but hangs on to stay up top for a cool visual.

The Swan Dive connects for two so Cena runs him over with the clothesline for two of his own. Cole mentions that HHH is referee, marking the most significant HHH portion of the match over twenty minutes in. Cena’s super AA is blocked by elbows to the head but Cena blocks the super hurricanrana. That means jumping down and dropping Bryan on top of his head in a botch I had forgotten about so the cringing is strong. The STF goes on with Bryan rolling over to take off some of the pressure.

Bryan manages to reverse into the YES Lock until Cena makes the rope. The running corner dropkicks have Cena in more trouble so he comes out of the corner with the hard clothesline to turn Bryan inside out. The slugout it on until they both hit flying shoulders for another double knockdown. Bryan wins the next slugout but the moonsault out of the corner is caught on Cena’s shoulders. That’s countered into a DDT and they’re both down again. Bryan tries a high crossbody but gets caught in the AA. It’s reversed again and Bryan kicks him in the head, setting up the debuting running knee for the pin and the title at 26:54.

Rating: A+. I go back and forth on which of the two big matches I like more and this time around I liked the story that much more. Bryan debuting the running knee to win is still one of my favorite things in a long time as it came out of nowhere and makes the move look devastating right off the bat. They had a great battle of styles here with both guys sticking with their respective specialties until Bryan broke down the machine through heart and determination, plus some awesome strikes. I had a great time with this one and it was one of the best matches I’ve seen in a good while.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is defending as well as out so Orton wins the title in eight seconds. There’s your major story over the next eight months and yes I still believe that Bryan winning the title at Wrestlemania was the plan all along (details to be determined).

Overall Rating: A-. This is one of those shows where the good is excellent and the rest just exists. That being said, with the two awesome main events and a rather good Del Rio vs. Christian match, you have a seven match card (leaving out the cash-in match) with three of them receiving some rather high praise. That’s about as good as you can get and it’s one of the better shows in recent memory. Yeah the other four matches range from bad to rather bad, but their times combined are about equal to the main event. Excellent show and worth your time (as in less than three hours) to see.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-
2014 Redo: B-
2017 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

Original: D+

2014 Redo: D

2017 Redo: F+

2019 Redo: F

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: C

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: D

Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Original: B+

2014 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

2019 Redo: B

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Original: F

2014 Redo: D-

2017 Redo: D-

2019 Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Dolph Ziggler/AJ Lee

Original: C-

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: D+

Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: N/A

2014 Redo: N/A

2017 Redo: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A-

2014 Redo: A

2017 Redo: A-

2019 Redo: A-

Was I in a really bad mood when I watched the Kickoff Show in 2017? And I’m all over the place with Cody vs. Sandow. Other than that, it’s pretty much the definitive set of ratings here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXXVII Night Two (2022 Redo): Did They Want Us To Be Mad?

Wrestlemania XXXVII Night Two
Date: April 11, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 25,675
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Ashland Craft

It’s the second night of Wrestlemania, because Wrestlemania needs to be a two night show. There are some big things this time too, including Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Daniel Bryan and Edge, Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens and MORE TAMINA/NATALYA! Let’s get to it.

Ashland Craft sings America the Beautiful. I’m not sure who she is but I was told she’s the new voice of country and WWE wouldn’t lie to me.

Opening video. It’s the same one as yesterday (albeit with some different clips), making it three airings if you watch all three parts on Peacock.

Here are Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan, this time dressed as pirates, to welcome us to the show. They agree that it’s hot but they both look good so it’s time to hype up the card. A bunch of pirate jokes don’t go very well so Titus switches to hyping up the Fiend vs. Randy Orton. They both say arrrrrgh a lot to wrap it up.

We recap Randy Orton vs. the Fiend. Orton burned the Fiend alive at TLC (because that’s what you do in an inferno match, so Alexa Bliss popped in as the female Fiend to go after Orton and bring back the Fiend, because this story needs to keep going. Fiend looks like even more of a slasher villain now and it’s time for the big showdown.

Randy Orton vs. The Fiend

The burned Fiend walks through the back and transforms into the regular version. Sure why not. LET ME IN flashes above the Titantron and now it’s Alexa Bliss as the female Fiend to the Firefly Funhouse theme. As she gets to ringside, there is a huge jack-in-the-box, with Bliss cranking the handle so the Fiend can pop out. Fiend dives off the box and clotheslines Orton to start. Orton’s neck gets twisted around but the threat of what looked like a Punt from Fiend sends him bailing outside.

Fiend shrugs off the belly to back onto the announcers’ table and puts on the Mandible Claw as they get back in. The hanging DDT connects but it’s too early for the RKO. Instead a charging Fiend is sent into the “box like structure” (oh that’s a famous one), setting up another hanging DDT.

That doesn’t do much again as Fiend hits a clothesline and hammers away, only to miss the backsplash. The RKO is countered into the Mandible Claw, with Fiend switching to load up Sister Abigail. Then fire shoots up from the posts and Bliss, with black goo on her face, is sitting on the box. Fiend reaches out to her and gets RKOed for the pin at 5:52.

Rating: D. I’m not sure if it’s as bad as the bugs on the mat at Wrestlemania XXXIII but this was another really bad idea, as Fiend’s stuff gets so over the top that it makes no sense and it just more dumb than anything else. If you want to do Wyatt vs. Orton then do Wyatt vs. Orton, but stop making it feel like I’ll get my answers if I read three tie-in comic books that come out two years from now.

Post match Orton leaves and the lights go out. Back up and Fiend/Bliss are gone, which, save for a one off appearance tomorrow on Raw, was it for Wyatt in WWE. After this, thank goodness.

Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan are in the back with Eric Bischoff when Bayley interrupts. She shakes Bischoff’s hand and praises his podcast before offering him a spot on Ding Dong Hello. Bischoff says he would like to have Bianca Belair on his podcast, maybe with Sasha Banks. Bayley isn’t impressed and says they’re nothing compared to him. Bischoff and Hogan suddenly remember that they need to look at a boat and Titus goes with them. Titus to Bayley: “Sorry. Hall of Fame stuff.”

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax vs. Tamina/Natalya

Tamina/Natalya are challenging after winning a gauntlet match yesterday. Baszler and Natalya go technical to start and that means an early standoff. Natalya tries a Sharpshooter but Baszler goes straight to the ropes, meaning it’s Jax coming in to shove Natalya down. Jax wants and gets Tamina though, giving us some of the cheering that led to Tamina being more of a thing in 2021.

An exchange of headbutts let them glare at each other so Tamina hammers her up against the ropes. Natalya comes back in with a double backdrop but Baszler comes in off a blind tag. Baszler has to small package her way out of a Sharpshooter attempt so Natalya goes with the release German suplex. Natalya catapults her into a superkick from Tamina (that was nice) but Baszler slips out of a slam. The rights and lefts rock Natalya for a change and a hard knee to the face knocks her silly.

Everything breaks down and Jax slams Tamina on the floor. We settle down to Baszler cranking on Natalya’s knee and you can hear the silence spreading. The stomp on the leg (“gnarly” according to Graves) allows Jax to come back in and lift Natalya up, with Baszler adding a running knee for two. Back up and Jax’s running shoulder hits the post but Tamina is STILL down on the floor. Natalya shouts COME ON YOU GUYS to try and wake the fans up a bit but Jax spinebusters her for two with Tamina making the save.

Tamina comes back in to clean a few rooms until Baszler kicks her legs out. The Kirifuda Clutch is blocked so Tamina goes up, where Baszler kicks her in the head to cut off the Superfly Splash. Everything breaks down and Jax dives off the top to crossbody Natalya and Tamina. The TAMINA chants start up and she plays Lex Luger Jax’s Yokozuna on an awful slam for two.

Tamina misses the Superfly Splash though and they’re both down again as this just keeps going. Natalya, looking close to death, gets the tag and basement drops Jax to (very slowly) set up the Sharpshooter. Granted it doesn’t matter as Baszler made a blind tag and Kirifuda Clutches Natalya to retain the titles at 14:15.

Rating: F. The only word I can think of here is failure, as we are now about fifty minutes into the show and the place was eerily quiet for some parts of this match. To take the second show with fans in over a year and have them go silent less than an hour into the night says that you have accomplished none of your goals. This was long, not good (at one point Tamina messed up A TAG by moving her hand and starting to come in before Natalya had tagged her) and then gave us an anticlimactic ending as the champs retain. Natalya and Tamina would get the belts in about a month anyway, making this all the dumber.

We recap Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens. Zayn has gone off the deep end, suggesting that there is a conspiracy against them because THEY are all out to get him. Owens can’t get behind it but offers to Stun some sense into him. Zayn has Logan Paul here as his guest as Owens continues to think Zayn is nuts. They did a nice job of having Zayn sound completely off his rocker for this and my goodness it’s cool to see Owens vs. Zayn at Wrestlemania.

Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn

JBL is guest commentator and Zayn brings out Logan Paul as his special guest. Zayn charges right at him to start and it’s a Pop Up Powerbomb three seconds in, with Zayn rolling outside. The apron powerbomb is broken up and they head back inside with Owens dropping him ribs first onto the top rope. A running corner clothesline rocks Zayn, who is bumping all over the place for Owens.

The Cannonball connects, allowing JBL to get in the Otto Wanz reference that he makes every time someone uses a Cannonball. They head to the apron and Zayn manages a brainbuster, which is quite the scary spot and comes pretty early in the match. The Michinoku Driver (Cole: “Blue Thunder Bomb!” Graves: “It’s a Michinoku Driver Cole. I’m gonna save you from the internet.”) gives Zayn two and he puts Owens on top. Owens fights out with right hands and the headbutt, setting up the frog splash for two.

A pumphandle driver onto the knee gives Owens two more but Zayn is back up with the exploder suplex into the corner. Another brainbuster gives Zayn another two and he hammers Owens down. They head up top and Owens reverses into the swinging superplex for the double knockdown. Some running clothesline in the corner rock Zayn but he’s right back with the Helluva Kick. Another Helluva Kick is cut off by a superkick, followed by a second one to make Paul cringe. The Stunner gives Owens the clean pin at 9:24.

Rating: B-. It felt like they were just getting in every signature move they could here and that was ok, as this was all about this match making it to the biggest stage in the world. That is something that would have felt like a dream back in the day but here they are. It’s a cool story and they made it work, with the first good match of the night as well.

Post match Paul checks on Zayn, who yells at him due to reasons of insanity. Paul shoves him so Zayn walks away, leaving Paul to raise Owens’ hand. A Stunner abounds.

Riddle is on his scooter in the back and runs into Great Khali. That means a pitch for giant scooters but Khali just stares at him. Rob Van Dam comes in and Riddle is impressed, with Van Dam translating Khali’s words as business advice. Van Dam has his own rolling papers and gives them out before hitting his catchphrase. HOW DO YOU SCREW UP VAN DAM MEETS RIDDLE???

Get vaccinated.

US Title: Sheamus vs. Riddle

Riddle is defending and they’re fighting because Sheamus beat him up with his scooter. They go straight to the brawling with Riddle striking away in the corner. Sheamus powers his way out of a choke and drives Riddle into the corner for some elbows to the face. The swinging release Rock Bottom (which isn’t usually a Sheamus move) gets two but the Irish Curse seems to wake Riddle up.

The armbreaker over the top rope has Sheamus in trouble but he reverses into the forearms to the chest. Back in and Sheamus goes up top, only to get belly to belly superplexed back down for a big crash. Riddle is back up with a Broton into a Jackhammer (Goldberg is not pleased) for two. With that not working, Riddle loads up a slingshot something, which is cut off with a hard knee.

They head to the apron with Riddle grabbing a German suplex. The springboard Floating Bro takes Sheamus down again and Riddle is rolling. Back in and Sheamus has to power out of a triangle choke into a powerbomb for two of his own, with Riddle switching the cover into a rear naked choke. It’s Sheamus going up so Riddle follows him, only to get pulled into White Noise. Middle rope knees give Sheamus two more so Riddle tries a springboard moonsault..which is Brogue Kicked out of the air (nice timing) for the pin and the title at 10:52.

Rating: C+. Time has helped this one a bit as Riddle was about to move on to RKBro, but this was a deflating loss as Riddle hadn’t been champion very long and then lost to Sheamus. The show continues to limit how much good it can do, though at least this one came after a pretty physical match. It isn’t like Sheamus as US Champion is a bad thing, but taking it from Riddle at Wrestlemania? That feels like a Fastlane kind of title match.

We look at Bad Bunny’s debut last night.

We recap Big E. vs. Apollo Crews in a Nigerian Drum Fight for Big E.’s Intercontinental Title. Big E. won the title on Christmas night but Crews turned heel and beat him up, because Big E. as a beaten down champion is the way to go. Then Crews embraced his Nigerian heritage and became little more than a caricature, only to have Big E. beat him at Fastlane. Therefore, we needed a rematch with a bunch of drums because culture.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Apollo Crews

Hometown boy Big E. is defending in a Nigerian Drum Fight, meaning anything goes and there are a bunch of drums around ringside. As a bonus, Wale raps Big E. to the ring to really make it feel special. Big E. starts fast with a kendo stick but gets a gong knocked out of his hands. Crews is back with some stick shots of his own so Big E. spears him through the ropes to take over.

The steps are set up at ringside, only to have Crews hit a Death Valley Driver onto the apron. That lets Crews lay Big E. onto the steps to try and slam the steps onto him but the steps only hits steps. Big E. is back up with a Rock Bottom off the apron onto the steps but instead of covering, let’s set up a table in the ring. The delay lets Crews hit a kick to the head and beat on him with a kendo stick, only to miss a frog splash through the table. Big E. hits the Big Ending, so here is a monster in a military uniform to come in and beat Big E. down. Crews is laid on top to win the title at 6:50.

Rating: D+. The drums were barely used as this was every other weapons brawl with kendo sticks, a table and the steps. Then the monster comes in to save Crews and win him the title, because Big E., in his hometown and with someone rapping him to the ring, had to lose the title to Apollo Crews here. They couldn’t do this at Smackdown or at Backlash or anything like that, but this show right here under these circumstances. After Riddle lost the US Title in the previous match. Say it with me: because WWE.

We look back at last night’s show, because Wrestlemania needs filler (possible because two of the five matches so far haven’t broken seven minutes). This eats up the better part of five minutes.

Hey! The media LOVED night one!

Get vaccinated!

Hall of Fame video, as this seems to be an intermission without being an intermission. This is the 2021 Class though, as 2020/2021 were inducted in the same year.

Here is the class in the stadium:

Rob Van Dam (nice reaction)
Molly Holly (long overdue)
Great Khali (sure why not)
Ozzy Osbourne (not here)
Eric Bischoff (that’s bizarre)
Rich Hering (longtime WWE employee, Warrior Award)
Kane (the big finale and again, well deserved)

Batista was scheduled to be in but didn’t appear here, as he will be inducted at some point in the future.

We recap Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley for Asuka’s Raw Women’s Title. Bianca Belair went after the Smackdown Women’s Title so Asuka needed a challenger. Game on.

Raw Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is challenging and gets played to the ring, because this show needs something else to drag it out. After the Big Match Intros, Asuka hits a dropkick to the back and a rollup gets a fast two. Another dropkick into the corner angers Ripley even more, only to have her charge get sent face first into the buckle. They head outside with Asuka’s pop up knee going somewhere in the vicinity of Ripley’s face.

Back in and Asuka hits a hard kick to the back, which is enough to make Ripley take her down and hammer away. The bodyscissors goes on with Ripley hitting her in the back and even messing with the rainbow hair. A series of clotheslines keeps Asuka in trouble but she pulls Ripley down into a kneebar. With that broken up, Ripley sends her into the corner but stops to jaw with some fans. Asuka shoves her off the top though and there’s the missile dropkick to put them both down.

Another trip up top is broken up for Asuka and Ripley drops her face first onto the apron. Asuka is fine enough to catch her with a DDT off the apron and out to the floor, which is good for two because modern wrestling is stupid. Some Kawada kicks wake Ripley up and she grabs the Prism Trap. That’s reversed into an armbar, which is countered with a hard swing into the corner to rock Asuka again. Another armbar goes on but Ripley fights out again. A running kick to the head is quickly countered though and Riptide connects for the pin and the title at 13:37.

Rating: C+. They were having a good, hard hitting match but then that DDT off the apron took me out of it. That was one of the most ridiculous non-finishes I’ve seen in a long time, as there was no reason to have someone be back in the ring within the next month, let alone win the match. Ripley getting the title was a good call in the end, but come up with less infused with dumb way to get there.

Get vaccinated!

We look back at Randy Orton vs. the Fiend, because that needs to be revisited.

Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan thank the fans for watching. Bayley comes out to complain about not getting respect and her lack of pyro. Cue the Bella Twins to get in her face, but Bayley reminds them that John Cena isn’t here tonight. The Bellas beat her up and get booed out of the stadium.

Here’s what’s coming on Peacock.

The next pay per view is Wrestlemania Backlash, because two nights just isn’t enough.

We recap Edge and Daniel Bryan challenging Roman Reigns for the Smackdown World Title. Edge had to retire because of his neck injuries but came back and won the Royal Rumble to earn his title shot. Then Bryan said he wanted to be in the match and made Reigns tap at Fastlane, but the referee didn’t see it. Edge interfered and cost Bryan the match, so let’s make it a triple threat.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns, with Paul Heyman and Jey Uso, is defending and Edge gets a heck of a reaction with probably the loudest pop of the weekend. Bryan gets knocked into the corner to start so Reigns starts unloading on Edge. That’s broken up by Bryan who fires off the European uppercuts, only to be sent outside. Jey adds a superkick and sends Bryan into the steps, leaving us with Edge vs. Reigns for the time being.

It’s time to go outside with the announcers’ table being loaded up but Bryan breaks that up with a suicide dive. Edge takes out Jey and then sends Reigns into the apron and barricade over and over. A posting drops Reigns so Edge heads back to Uso. The Edgecution onto the steps knocks Uso silly so here are the medics to take Uso out. That leaves Edge to roll Bryan up for a pair of near falls back inside but Reigns is back up to fight over a suplex on the apron.

Bryan pulls Reigns to the floor and there’s the missile dropkick to Edge back inside. Reigns is back in to take both of them down, which is enough for him to want some acknowledgment. Edge gets in an Edge-O-Matic on Reigns but he’s right back up with the Superman Punch. The spear is countered into a sunset flip for two as Heyman is getting worried. They both try spears and collide in the middle for a double knockdown. Bryan is back in with a Swan Dive to Reigns for two, followed by the YES Kicks to both.

The big one gets two on Reigns so Bryan grabs the YES Lock, drawing Edge over for the save. That earns Edge a YES Lock of his own but this time it’s Reigns making a save of his own and unloading on Bryan with right hands. They go back outside with Reigns (slowly) powerbombing Bryan through the announcers’ table but taking too long to pose, allowing Edge to spear him off the steps.

Edge sends him back inside and grabs some chairs but switches to the Crossface instead. The piece of the chair makes the Crossface worse but here is Bryan to come in and block the tap. Bryan adds a YES Lock while the Crossface is still on so Edge and Bryan exchange headbutts to break the double hold. That goes to Bryan as well, so he stomps on Edge’s neck, while shouting about how bad it is.

The running knee is loaded up but Edge spears Bryan down and then does the same to Reigns, with Bryan having to pull the referee out at two. With the normal stuff not working, Edge grabs some chairs and unloads on both of them. The Conchairto crushes Bryan but Uso is back in for the save. Reigns is back up and it’s a Conchairto to Edge, setting up the double pin to retain the titles at 22:42.

Rating: A-. This was so far and away the match of both nights that it isn’t even a fair comparison. It felt like a major showdown with Edge and Bryan getting close to being able to make Reigns work hard. The ending might have been a bit cliched with Uso interfering to keep the title, but dang it was fun with some clever spots and a lot of effort throughout. Awesome main event and the big saving grace of a pretty awful night.

The Bloodline poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a show where the wrestling wasn’t the point. The main event was great, but there was so much downtime and so much stuff that felt like it was there to anger the fans rather than make them happy. You have two popular champions lose their titles, whatever that box thing was, and a nearly fifteen minute Natalya/Tamina match. I’m not sure how this was supposed to be a happy show, but it was almost painful to watch at times.

Overall Overall Rating: C+. The first night was a lot better than the first, but this whole thing felt like it would have been better off as a long one off show. It came off like WWE was trying to fill in time far more often than they needed to here and it made the show feel long. Other than the main event and maybe one or two other matches, you could cut off the second night almost entirely. Overall it’s good, if nothing else because they had fans back, but this really needed to be trimmed down.

Ratings Comparison

Randy Orton vs. The Fiend

Original: D
Redo: D

Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax vs. Tamina/Natalya

Original: D
Redo: F

Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Riddle vs. Sheamus

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Apollo Crews vs. Big E.

Original: C+
Redo: D+

Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Edge vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Roman Reigns

Original: A-
Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B-
Redo: C-

Overall Overall Rating

Original:
Redo: C+

That Women’s Tag Team Title match was a big downgrade and what was I thinking on Crews vs. Big E?

 

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Wrestlemania XXXVII Night One (2022 Redo): I Remember Those People

Wrestlemania XXXVII Night One
Date: April 10, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 25,675
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Bebe Rexha

This is somewhere in between a Performance Center Wrestlemania and the regular version, as the show is taking place in front of a limited capacity audience. That alone is worth a look and now it is time for a Wrestlemania style show. The main event for the first night is Bianca Belair challenging Sasha Banks for the Smackdown Women’s Title. Let’s get to it.

No Kickoff Show matches (on either night) this year, which is a little weird to see.

The huge pirate ship set looks awesome, as WWE knows how to use what is available to them.

Here is Vince McMahon, with the roster behind him on the stage, to talk about how bad things have been over the last year. As we emerge from this pandemic, WWE would like to thank the fans for sticking with them and WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA! Very nice and you know it’s a big moment when the boss is out there for something like this.

Bebe Rexha, with a guitar player, singe America the Beautiful.

The opening video talks about how the WWE Universe has waited a long time to get back here, and now they are back for the spectacle and the passion. Wrestlemania is back in business (there’s a tagline for you). Tonight we will see an event that is bigger than the history of history.

That line is so bad that the voiceover from last year (with a bad Jack Sparrow impression) takes over to say this is a continuation from last year with wrestlers fighting for immortality. Now let’s drop some realness (as the kids say, because apparently kids say that), because tonight we continue a decades old spectacle.

That sets up the Wrestlemania highlight package, but first we need to thank the fans, including those in a commemorative chair or watching tonight on Peacock. The course has been corrected and this can’t be stopped. Sparrow voiceover: “Now how’s that for a cold open?” The original voiceover wants a big finish though so how about this: WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA!

Commentary welcomes us to the show….which is being delayed due to a weather delay, because of course it is. The fans bust out the ponchos and start heading for the concourses as this is quite the change of plans. With nothing else going on, commentary talks about Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley getting to start the show but since we have some time to fill, we’re going to get some special interviewers backstage.

Shane McMahon talks about how he hasn’t been bullying Braun Strowman and is ready to take him out tonight. MVP and Bobby Lashley interrupt to say that tonight will be the crowning moment of the Almighty Era. Drew McIntyre only understands violence and tonight, Lashley is going to give him that. McIntyre pops in and says Mother Nature can’t save Lashley so let’s do it back here.

MVP and Lashley are taken out and McIntyre talks about how he is trying to keep his emotions together and won’t lose it last year. Last year they were at the Performance Center and he won the WWE Title, lost it for three weeks and got it back, but now the weather is trying to hold him back again. Lashley is losing the title tonight. You can tell that McIntyre isn’t comfortable improving.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about how important the show is.

New Day is fired up about having the crowd back and you can’t feel that feeling until you feel it. They accepted AJ Styles and Omos’ challenge because they are fighting champions and don’t care how big or phenomenal their challengers are. No one can hang with them and here is Big E. to glare at interviewer Kevin Patrick, plus hype up how great the rest of the team is. It nearly turns into a sermon, as Patrick seems a bit scared.

Cole dubs the show Wrestlerainia but seems to be alone in that one.

Braun Strowman says he’s ready to get out there and destroy Shane McMahon for the sake of everyone who has ever been bullied. This isn’t going to be pretty or technical, because Shane is going to be beaten into an inch of his life. Tonight, he’s proving that bullies do not win.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about Vince McMahon’s speech.

Kevin Owens, rocking that KO Mania V shirt, takes the microphone from Kevin Patrick to talk about his history with Sami Zayn. They have known each other for almost twenty years and they started wrestling each other all over. One time they wrestled each other in front of 23 people in Owens’ hometown. They went to New York City, to Peru and around the world, but in those twenty years, no two people were talked down to by “industry experts” like they were.

Now they are here and tomorrow night they get to do it again at Wrestlemania. It has never been this big or this important but this isn’t the Sami that he has known. That’s ok though, because in the end, this is Wrestlemania and it’s Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens. Tomorrow night, Owens is Stunning some sense back into Zayn and if Logan Paul wants to try something, he’ll be in the ring. To the point, eloquent, and it told the story of their match. This stuff can be done with zero scripting and if the people can handle that, I have no idea why they aren’t given the chance.

Michael Cole and Samoa Joe, in ponchos, hype up the show being on in less than five minutes. In a good note for the two of them, Byron Saxton’s microphone has died.

Bianca Belair isn’t nervous but she knows she is getting in the ring with Sasha Banks. Belair doesn’t run from competition so tonight, she is proving that she is the best. Not too bad here.

Seth Rollins can’t remember Kevin Patrick’s name (Rollins: “It’s Mike right?”) but he loves the chaos of Wrestlemania. He isn’t happy with hearing about Zazaro Swinging him a record number of times but it was probably to help Zazaro springboard to a new level. Tonight the clouds will clear and the sun will shine down on the new Mr. Wrestlemania.

Miz and John Morrison aren’t worried about Bad Bunny and Damian Priest because they’re stars. BE JEALOUS!

The Kickoff Show panel gives us one more quick hype.

Now this is kind of interesting, because the Peacock version of the show has the weather delay with the promos as its own video (which is billed as the start of the show). Vince’s speech and America the Beautiful are on the regular video of the show and there is no mention of the delay, though the video with the delay references Vince’s speech. Because WWE.

Speaking of Because WWE, the opening video is on both the weather delay video and the regular Wrestlemania video.

Since we can’t just GET ON WITH IT ALREADY (and because the fans need to get back in their seats), here are hosts Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan, with the latter not getting the most positive reaction. Titus is fired up to be in his hometown and the WWE Universe is bringing the energy that they need. After one year, one month and one day, we are back live! Hogan doesn’t think the fans heard him so Titus says it again to a stronger reaction. They hype up the opening match with the Hurt Lock vs. the Claymore and wonder what happens when the Hulkamaniacs run wild for TWO NIGHTS!

We recap Bobby Lashley defending the WWE Title against Drew McIntyre. Miz cashed in Money in the Bank against McIntyre and won the title, only to lose it to Lashley eight days later (which was about as obvious of a result as you could have, as there was no way Miz was going to Wrestlemania as champion). McIntyre is getting his rematch, with Lashley trying to have the roster take McIntyre out before the show. That didn’t work, and now it is time for the showdown.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley, with MVP, is defending. They fight over the power lockup to start until Lashley runs him over with a shoulder. The overhead belly to belly works a bit better for McIntyre, who throws in a bit of a crude gesture. Some shoving goes to McIntyre but Lashley hits him in the face to cut that off. A running clothesline takes Lashley to the floor, where he is fine enough to drive McIntyre into the barricade a few times.

Back in and a neckbreaker gives Lashley one (because McIntyre doesn’t wait for two) before he sends McIntyre into the corner. The charge takes too long though and the arm goes into the post. A Codebreaker to the arm sets up a failed cross armbreaker attempt so McIntyre goes with some clotheslines instead. There’s the overhead belly to belly and then another one has Lashley in more trouble (as we see commentary standing at ringside for some reason, likely weather related).

The Futureshock is blocked though and Lashley hits the spinning Dominator for two of his own. McIntyre gets planted with the big spinebuster for two more but he’s right back with the reverse Alabama Slam. They go up top with the superplex being broken up so McIntyre puts on a Kimura up there instead. Lashley knocks him out so McIntyre does the situp toss back down (that always looks cool).

Back up and Lashley hits another spinebuster but, after a few seconds (good), McIntyre nips up for the staredown. Another belly to belly sends Lashley down again and now the Futureshock can connect. McIntyre isn’t done though as he rolls two more Futureshocks for two so it’s time to load up the Claymore. Lashley bails outside to avoid the whole kick in the face thing, only to have McIntyre hit a big running flip dive to the floor to take out Lashley and MVP at the same time.

Back in and the Hurt Lock is blocked so Lashley sends him flying again with a suplex. The Downward Spiral looks to set up the Hurt Lock again but McIntyre rams him into the corner for the break. A third spinebuster is countered into the Kimura, which is broken up as well for another double knockdown. McIntyre wins a slugout but MVP offers a distraction, allowing Lashley to duck the Claymore. The Hurt Lock goes on and McIntyre is in trouble, with even the flip out of the corner not breaking it up. McIntyre finally passes out to retain Lashley’s title at 18:21.

Rating: B. This was the heavyweight slugfest style match as you had two big men beating on each other until one of them couldn’t keep going. It was hard hitting, it was a heck of a fight, and it was about who could stay on their feet. That’s how you open the show and it felt Wrestlemania worthy, even if the ending wasn’t the best thing. Heck of an effort here though and this one stuck with me even over the last year.

Titus O’Neil is backstage with the NWO (Hogan/Hall/Nash/Syxx) and offers them a spot on Ding Dong Hello. She’ll settle for a Too Sweet, but only Hall and Syxx take her up on it before leaving. I forgot how good Bayley was as a heel.

Tag Team Turmoil

Five teams and the winners get a Women’s Tag Team Title shot tomorrow night. Lana/Naomi are in at #1 (they both like to dance) and Billie Kay/Carmella (after Kay FINALLY found a partner to pay off her amazing resume deal) are in at #2, with Kay not being exactly great at trying to match Carmella’s more suggestive entrances (but there was nothing for her to do in WWE because reasons). Carmella takes Lana into the corner to start and beats her down, only to have Lana slip away from Kay.

The hot tag brings in Naomi for the pull someone’s face into the back of her tights (because WE’RE HAVING FUN) before handing it back to Lana. This proves to be a bad idea as Lana can’t time kicking Kay down so Kay rolls Naomi up (with an assist from Carmella) for the elimination at 2:19.

The Riott Squad (Liv Morgan/Ruby Riott) are in at #3 with Morgan kicking Kay in the face (take notes Lana). Kay manages to put her down in the corner so though so Carmella can do her moonwalk into the dropkick. That doesn’t last long as Morgan fights up and hits a Codebreaker, only to hold Kay on top. Riott adds a top rope backsplash for the pin at 4:58 (total) but Carmella superkicks Morgan down after the fall.

Dana Brooke/Mandy Rose are in at #4, with Mandy infamously slipping on the ramp (edited out here, because WWE doesn’t make mistakes). An early Blockbuster drops Dana but she’s right back with a running flip neckbreaker for two. Riott grabs a sunset flip for the same and it’s Morgan coming in to pick up the pace. A Codebreaker into the Riott Kick gets two with Brooke having to make the save.

Rose gets in a kick to the ribs in the corner though Rose slips on the middle rope. Brooke slaps Rose in a rather personal area for a tag (sure why not) before a superplex drops Morgan. Not that it matters though as Morgan reverses into a small package for the pin at 9:17. After the ring announcer says the Riott Squad was eliminated and then issues a correction, Natalya and Tamina complete the field at #5.

Morgan rolls Natalya up for two but it’s off to Tamina for a sitout powerbomb. Tamina gets taken into the corner though and it’s the Codebreaker into the backsplash for two, because Tamina doesn’t get pinned you see. The superkick sends Morgan outside and there’s the Hart Attack to Riott. The Sharpshooter is loaded up but Natalya hands it off to Tamina for the Superfly Splash and the final pin at 14:06.

Rating: D. Egads man. The Women’s Tag Team Titles have been good for about three months out of the nearly three years they have been around and that is the case again here. Natalya and Tamina are about as interesting as the dogcatcher and the The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County, but they need to go over the Riott Squad, Kay and Brooke/Rose, because of course they do. This match was frustrating and bad on top of that, as you have a bunch of thrown together teams (and the Riott Squad) fighting for a shot against another thrown together/oddball team. Just drop the titles already.

Get vaccinated!

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro. Rollins got swung around a bunch of times so he pointed out that Cesaro had never had a Wrestlemania Moment (whatever definition we’re using for it this year) in the form of some campaign ads of who you should approve of more. The match was set up as a result, with Cesaro wanting his big shot.

Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro

Cesaro hits a running uppercut to start and knocks Rollins to the apron for a bonus. There’s a knee lift but Rollins snaps the arm across the top rope to take over. Back in and Cesaro’s superplex is countered into a Buckle Bomb for two as Rollins turns up the sneering. The top rope superplex into the Falcon Arrow gives Rollins two but Cesaro is back up with another uppercut.

The Swing (you knew that was coming) sets up the Sharpshooter but Rollins makes the rope. Rollins drops him again and hits a corkscrew frog splash (that’s a new one) for two of his own. Cesaro is right back up with a Neutralizer for two, setting up the shocked kickout face. Another attempt is countered into a quick Pedigree to give Rollins his own near fall and they’re both down (as long as he doesn’t start countering Pedigrees, we should be ok).

Rollins shouts about how he survived the Neutralizer and the Swing, setting up a missed running kick to the face. That’s fine with Rollins, who swings his leg back and kicks Cesaro in the back of the head instead (cool). The Stomp is countered into the uppercut so now it’s the torture rack swing (with no hands, because THAT’S SOMETHING ELSE HE CAN DO). The 23 rotation Swing sets up another Neutralizer for the pin on Rollins at 11:27.

Rating: B-. They got the result right as there was no way Cesaro was coming back from losing after everything Rollins said about him. The problem is that if this was going to mean anything, it needed to come about six years earlier. I’m happy to see Cesaro get his win, but it’s really hard to buy that it is going to mean anything beyond maybe the next few weeks. Good match though, which shouldn’t be a surprise given who was in there.

We look at Jey Uso winning the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal, plus Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler retaining the Smackdown Tag Team Titles, last night on Smackdown.

Ziggler and Roode pick AJ Styles and Omos to take the Raw Tag Team Titles from New Day.

Raw Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. AJ Styles/Omos

New Day (Xavier Woods/Kofi Kingston) is defending and this is Omos’ in-ring debut. Kofi and Omos start but Woods chants at Styles and gets him to start instead. Styles can’t get the Calf Crusher early on so they trade rollups instead. A belly to back suplex sends AJ face first onto the mat and it’s time for some Francesca from Woods. That’s enough for Woods to come in and grab a headlock, allowing him to shout about how they are cutting the ring in half. Styles fights up and tries to get over for the tag but Woods realizes that could cause a variety of damage.

Woods drags him back to the corner before sending Styles to the floor, setting up a dropkick through the ropes. Kofi keeps Styles down and a springboard splash to the back gets two. UpUpDownDown is loaded up but Styles kicks his way out and crawls over to Omos for the tag, despite Woods’ protests.

The tag brings in Omos (Kofi: “YOU GOT THIS WOODS!”) and Woods’ kicks have no effect. Kofi’s top rope chop is pulled out of the air and a backbreaker has Woods’ back bent over Omos’ knee. A side slam drops Woods again and Styles comes back in with a Phenomenal Forearm off of Omos’ shoulders to knock Woods silly as this isn’t going well for the champs. A standing Sky High sets up the pin with one foot to finish Kofi for the titles at 9:45.

Rating: C. The match might not have been the best, but the story it told worked well. What mattered here was having Omos look like an unstoppable monster and they nailed every bit of that side. What they didn’t nail was the part where Styles, who could probably beat either member of New Day with a limited amount of trouble, was treated like Jesse to Omos’ Festus. The Omos stuff worked, but the Styles half really didn’t work.

Styles sits on Omos’ shoulders for the cool visual after the match.

GET VACCINATED!

The cage is lowered.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman. Shane decided that Strowman was stupid and bullied him for the beat you over the head story of the show. Then Shane slimed him (as poured green goo over him) but their match at Fastlane was postponed to here due to Shane’s knee injury. This story was dumb and designed to put the focus on Shane, because of course it was.

Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman

Inside a cage with pinfall, submission or escape and Jerry Lawler joins commentary. As Lawler makes every joke about Strowman being stupid that he can think of, Jaxson Ryker and Elias (Shane’s goons) jump Strowman with chairs on the floor. A chair is thrown in with Strowman so the beatdown can be on. Strowman takes the chair away but Shane kicks him in the leg and takes over again because he’s Shane McMahon.

Shane’s escape attempt doesn’t work so he punches and kicks Strowman down in the corner. Another escape attempt is broken up but this time Shane pulls a piece of sheet metal off the top and beats Strowman down with that instead. Strowman fights up again and hits him in the face, with Shane being nice enough to sell for a few seconds. The running powerslam is loaded up but the knee gives out, allowing Shane to send him face first into the cage.

A DDT drops Strowman and Coast To Coast hits Strowman in the ribs. Shane goes for the climb so here are Ryker and Elias to help him over but Strowman knocks them off the cage. That makes Shane fall back inside too but of course he’s fine enough to get up again. This time Strowman follows, only to find a well placed toolbox (at least there would be a reason to have that up there) and knock Strowman off.

That’s enough for Shane to get over the top, where Strowman grabs him by the hand and then rip the cage open (that’s a new one) to pull him back inside. Strowman pulls him to the top of the cage and throws him down for the huge crash. Instead of climbing out though, Strowman climbs down, gives a speech about how this is for everyone who has ever been called stupid. The running powerslam finishes Shane at 11:26.

Rating: D. I for one enjoyed seeing the Shane McMahon Show here, as this was giving me Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax at Wrestlemania XXXIV vibes. This should have been Shane getting in a few shots off the interference and then being crushed like an old can. Instead, it was Shane beating on Strowman and getting in all of his stuff before Strowman beat him up to win. As usual, it was about Shane first and then everyone else, because that’s the Wrestlemania tradition we need to continue.

Here are some fireworks as the cage is raised.

Commentary talks about the Hall of Fame induction but Bayley interrupts, saying she can do Cole’s job better. She throws us to the induction ceremony video, with various people talking about how great this is.

Here is this year’s class:

JBL (long overdue)

William Shatner (not here but at least he did some stuff in wrestling before)

Bella Twins (who can’t quite do their dance in those dresses)

Jushin Thunder Liger (not here but he should be in every Hall of Fame)

Titus O’Neil (Warrior Award, as the man is a saint)

British Bulldog (again, how was he not already in)

NWO (yeah they’ll do as headliners)

Wrestlemania XXXVIII is in Texas.

Bad Bunny/Damian Priest vs. Miz/John Morrison

Booker T. is on commentary. Bunny is one of the hottest rappers in the world and a lifelong WWE fan. He performed his song about Booker T. so Miz and John Morrison wanted some collaboration. That wasn’t happening, so they broke his DJ’s equipment. Bunny eliminated them from the Royal Rumble and then picked up Damian Priest as a partner, setting up the big showdown. Miz and Morrison also destroyed Bunny’s really expensive car to make it…well material rather than personal in this case.

As for tonight, an army of bunnies hop to the ring, albeit with ears (and a head) falling off, leaving the rest of them to hold their big bunny heads on, because that’s how WWE does things. Miz and Morrison show up to do their Hey Hey Hop Hop rap live, which was a catchy song. On the other hand, Bunny rides into the stadium on the top of a semi truck for a pretty cool entrance.

Priest backs Miz into the corner to start but Miz wants Bunny instead. That’s exactly what he gets, with Bunny looking more comfortable than I would have expected. Miz sticks his chin out so Bunny hits him in the face (Morrison: “Rabbits are lucky! That was luck!”) before another right hand knocks him into the corner. The frustration is on so Bunny tackles him down and hammers away. Miz gets a bit more serious but this time Bunny grabs an armdrag.

Morrison isn’t happy and tells Miz to act like they’re the best tag team of the 21st century. A rather spinning headscissors takes Miz down again so Morrison comes in for a change. That means a headbutt to send him into the corner and a running elbow….is elbowed out of the air to put Bunny in trouble for the first time. The pace slows down a bit as Miz gets to mock Bunny and then rip at his face. Bunny fights out of a chinlock but Miz hits the big boot to cut him off again.

Another shot knocks Bunny to the floor and Morrison busts out a Spinarooni, meaning Booker gets in his catchphrase. Priest makes the mistake of looking at the crowd and gets knocked down by Miz, allowing Bunny to get dragged back into the corner. Bunny gets a boot up in the corner though and a tornado DDT out of the corner gives him a breather. That’s enough for the tag to Priest to start cleaning house, including the toss suplex to send Miz into Morrison.

The South of Heaven chokeslam gets two on Miz as everything breaks down. Stereo head claps set up stereo Broken Arrows for two on Miz and Morrison with the villains rolling outside. Of course that means the big dive from Bunny but Priest gets knocked down back inside. Morrison pulls Bunny to the floor, where Bunny hits a Canadian Destroyer to leave Miz stunned. Back in and a Doomsday crossbody finishes Miz at 15:03.

Rating: B. It was longer than it needed to be and Bunny selling the first ten minutes was certainly a choice, but this was WAY up there on the celebrity match list. Bunny clearly put in some effort and time as he looked good with the stuff he was doing out there. It was more him doing moves than wrestling a match but for a one off, this was a very successful debut. Bunny is the celebrity and is going to get the attention because he is the reason the match is taking place, but he more than delivered here and it was a very impressive showing.

We look back at Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley from earlier in the night.

Here’s what’s coming tomorrow night.

We recap Sasha Banks vs. Bianca Belair for the Smackdown Women’s Title. Belair won the Royal Rumble and gets to challenge for the title, with both of them talking about how they’re the rest best around here. This was a simple story but it was set up well, with Belair being treated as the next big thing but needing to conquer the current big thing.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Belair is challenging and we get the Big Match Intros. They fight over the lockup to start until Banks pulls her down, only to have Belair nip up. Belair takes Banks down instead but has to bail out of a standing moonsault. Banks sends her to the apron for a neck snap across the top and a ram into the post, setting up Banks’ big dive to the floor. That’s fine with Belair, who catches said dive and gorilla presses Banks for a walk up the steps (that’s not normal, at all).

Back in and Banks gets in a few shots of her own, setting up some rights and lefts on the mat. The double arm crank keeps Belair down so let’s hit the wide shot to show off the SNICKERS logos. Banks goes up top so Belair brings her right back down with the big crash. They head outside where Banks uses the hair to pull Belair into the post, only to miss the running knees against the barricade.

Back in and Belair grabs a VERY delayed suplex, complete with a slingshot and muscling Banks back up before taking Banks back for the double knockdown. Banks is up first and grabs the hair, which is used to pull her into a clothesline from Belair. A standing shooting star hits Banks and a release Glam Slam drops her again. Belair’s 450 only hits knees though and they’re both down again. Back up and Belair is fine enough to hit a pair of powerbombs for two, meaning they’re down again.

This time it’s Banks up first with a double springboard tornado DDT (that was cool), with the kickout leaving her stunned. The frog splash (with Cole thinking it was a Meteora) gets two on Belair and now frustration is setting in. They head outside with Banks sending her into the steps before taking it back inside for the Bank Statement. Belair looks more scared than hurt and it’s made even worse as Banks rolls into the middle. You don’t do that to Belair, who rolls forward to make the ropes for the break.

Belair drives her into the corner with straight power but can’t hit a Stratusphere. Instead Banks gets her into the Tree of Woe but misses the Alberto double stomp. Now Belair can hit her 450 for two, meaning it’s her time to scream in shock. The KOD is loaded up but Banks sticks the landing, so Belair is done playing. The big whip with the hair rocks Banks and now the KOD gives Belair the pin and the title 17:27. Ignore Cole shouting about a kickout.

Rating: B. There was a lot more laying around in this one than I thought but they did a good job with Banks’ natural skills vs. Belair’s power/athleticism. This was making me think of Asuka taking the NXT Women’s Title from Bayley back in 2016, as Bayley was great but Asuka was that much better and overwhelmed her. Very good match and the first time a women’s singles match has headlined the show to give it the historical aspect.

The big celebration is on to end the show, complete with Belair’s family in the front row for a nice touch.

Overall Rating: B-. Overall the show is good, but there are some rather part parts that hold it back. You can only get so far with stuff like the Tag Team Turmoil match and the cage match, which both dragged on and didn’t seem to be the hottest stories in the first place. Other than that, it is the same problem as last year: having the show split in half takes away the feeling of this being the biggest show of the year. I get why they’re doing it, but egads it doesn’t feel as special. The good matches here are more than enough to carry it, but this is far from a classic.

Ratings Comparison

Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: B-

Redo: B

Tag Team Turmoil

Original: D

Redo: D

Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

Redo: B-

AJ Styles/Omos vs. New Day

Original: C+

Redo: C

Braun Strowman vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D

Redo: D

Miz/John Morrison vs. Bad Bunny/Damian Priest

Original: C

Redo: B

Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Almost everything is about the same save for Bad Bunny/Priest, which is better than I remembered.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2013 (2019 Redo): One Of The Classics

Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,739
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s a double main event tonight with a pair of smaller guys vs. big powerhouses with CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar and Daniel Bryan challenging John Cena for the World Title. This is remembered as one of the best shows in a very long time for WWE and it should be interesting to see how well it holds up. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: United States Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Rob Van Dam

Ambrose is defending and there’s no Shield with him to start. Some standing switches go nowhere and Ambrose continues to look moderately displeased by the whole thing at worst. Rob is right back up with a spinning kick to the chest, meaning he can hit those finger pokes. You don’t do that to Ambrose, who chops away in the corner and stops a charging Rob with a kick to the face.

The neck crank goes on, followed by a running dropkick against the ropes to keep Rob in trouble. It’s back to the chinlock with the microphones picking up the spot calling. Rob is right back up with a kick to the face and the split legged moonsault out of the corner for two. A kick to the head breaks up the original Dirty Deeds (headlock driver) but here are Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins. That brings out Mark Henry and Big Show and we take a break. Back with everyone standing at ringside and Dean dropping an elbow for two. The ECW chants bring Rob back to life but Dean sends him outside.

That means a staredown between the four on the floor with Rob managing a suplex on Dean. The spinning kick to the back on the apron has Dean in even more trouble and it’s a top rope cannonball for two back inside. Dean is right back with a spinebuster for two of his own but misses his top rope elbow. Rob has to go after Rollins instead of trying the Five Star so he kicks Dean down again. The Five Star connects but Roman Reigns comes in with a spear for the DQ at 13:40.

Rating: B-. This worked rather well and is one of Van Dam’s last good matches either in WWE or anywhere for that matter. He looked like his old self here and made Ambrose look good, even when he got the DQ win. This was still before Shield had reached their peak and they were far better as a team anyway. It got the crowd going and happened to be a good match in the process. Not bad for the Kickoff.

Here’s the Miz as your host for the evening. His task at the moment: tell us about the main events we already know. How TNA of him. We’re about to hear our first match but Fandango and Summer Rae cut him off with some dancing. Miz: “Really? Really? WELCOME TO SUMMERSLAM!”

The opening video focuses on Los Angeles and how big things happen here. Like Summerslam. That’s a nice motif and it moves into the double main event, which is indeed sounding great. Future note: the music during this video would become Akira Tozawa’s theme (not sure if that’s a Network edit or not).

Dig that pyro. Seriously with all the money they have, we can only get it at Wrestlemania and the Saudi shows?

Jojo from Total Divas sings the National Anthem. This was a plot point on Total Divas because that she needed to stretch for plot points.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

This is a Ring of Fire match, meaning an Inferno match with pins and submissions only. It’s also Bray’s in-ring debut, which is almost weird to imagine. Harper and Rowan are in Wyatt’s corner, as tends to be the case. The bell rings and the flames come up, going all of six inches high. Kane slugs away to start and the flames do go higher as someone lands on the mat.

Harper and Rowan get closer to the ring and the flames go WAY up to make things look a lot better. Kane hits a suplex to pop the flames again and avoids a big boot, sending Bray close to the fire. Bray’s running splash in the corner connects and he hammers away as the fans aren’t exactly thrilled so far. Back up and Kane sends him into the corner and the side slam makes the flames go up again. The chokeslam is broken up and Harper tries to throw in a kendo stick but the flames cut it off.

Cue the fireman to put the stick out, allowing Kane to hit the chokeslam. Rowan grabs the fire extinguisher to try and put out the flames but they come right back up as Kane hits another chokeslam. For some reason there’s no cover so Kane hits a third chokeslam, meaning it’s Tombstone time. Hold on again though as Harper and Rowan put a blanket over the flames and get in for the beatdown. The fans want Undertaker but settle for Sister Abigail to finish Kane at 7:49.

Rating: F. Well that was dumb. You have Wyatt getting destroyed until the goons saved him, the flames not lasting seven minutes before someone figured a way around them, and the match being dreadful until the ending. Pick two of them and you can figure out what was wrong with this one. It was a good idea on paper but the execution was a nightmare, which sums up Wyatt’s whole career.

Post match Wyatt puts on his hat and sits in the rocking chair as Harper and Rowan put Kane’s head on the steps. They pick up the other steps and crush his head for the big knockout, which looked better than most of the match. Harper and Rowan carry Kane out.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about the Wyatt Family.

On the Kickoff Show, Paul Heyman talked about how the real story of David vs. Goliath is that Goliath took the best shot and then destroyed David. Heyman has gotten both sides to agree that tonight can be No DQ so Lesnar can finish Punk for good.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Sandow is Mr. Money in the Bank and cost Cody the briefcase to break up their team. Before the match, Sandow talks about how there have been great pairings throughout literary history, with each pair having a lackey. Tonight, Sandow proves that he was the leader by sending Cody back to the land of clowns. Cody starts fast and hammers away before getting two off a backdrop. Sandow is right back with a suplex and a double arm crank as this is already feeling like a TV match.

An early Cross Rhodes attempt is blocked and Sandow hits the Russian legsweep into the wind-up elbow for two. Something like Edge’s Edgecation goes on but Cody kicks away without much effort. Cody catches him on top with a MuscleBuster of all things and that gets the fans into things for a change. A missile dropkick gives Cody two more and the Disaster Kick knocks Sandow silly for another two. Cody misses a charge into the post to give Sandow two but Cody snaps off Cross Rhodes for the pin at 6:39.

Rating: D. This was a case where Cody should have won the briefcase and moved up to the World Title scene but instead they went with Sandow and the whole thing flopped because no one bought him in that spot. Maybe they were planning on having Cody take the briefcase from him, but the damage was already done. It’s a case of putting too much thought into things as WWE screwed up something else.

We recap Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio for the Smackdown World Title. Alberto had put Christian on the shelf late last year and now Christian is the challenger of the month. Actually saying this is recapping Christian vs. Alberto is a little misleading as Alberto is neither seen nor mentioned in the video. I know he’s not interesting but come on now.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio

Alberto is defending. They circle each other a few times until a loud kick to the leg has Christian in trouble. A headlock doesn’t do much for the champ as Christian comes back up with a right hand and a toss over the ropes. Back in and Christian gets caught on top for the running enziguri into the running kicks to the chest. It’s time to go to the arm, as tends to be Del Rio’s style.

The armbar doesn’t last long so Del Rio throws him into the air for the big crash to the mat. A top rope double stomp to the arm gets two but Del Rio misses a charge and goes crashing out to the floor. That lets Christian hit a dive off the top and they’re both down. Back in and Del Rio goes right back to the arm, because it’s a plan that works well. He deviates from said plan by going up and diving into raised boots though, allowing Christian to hammer away in the corner.

The high crossbody gets two on the champ but the Killswitch is countered into a Backstabber. Another running enziguri in the corner rocks Christian for two more but he’s fine enough to hit a middle rope elbow to the jaw. A super hurricanrana gives Christian another two and it’s time for the spear.

Since the idea of selling Christian’s spear makes anyone cringe, Del Rio dropkicks him in the face for two instead. There’s a low superkick for another two, with the fans dubbing this awesome. Eh…..it’s close but I don’t know about that. Christian hits the spear out of nowhere but the arm is banged up, allowing Del Rio to slap on the armbreaker for the tap at 12:29.

Rating: B. I can’t go all the way to awesome but this was a rather fun match with Christian throwing everything he had. That being said, I wasn’t buying a lot of the near falls as Christian never hit the Killswitch and Del Rio never won with anything but the armbreaker. Christian’s career was more or less done at this point, as he would be put out of action again in a few months and have his last comeback with his final match in March.

Post match Del Rio says he’ll be the hero Los Angeles needs. Someone get this man a big bus!

Video on Summerslam Axxess earlier in the day, complete with a women’s tag match including Marina Menunos.

Maria is here and talks about the Bella Twins freaking out about Maria saying Natalya did well on Total Divas. Cue Fandango and Summer Rae to dance but Maria and Miz do just the same, leaving Fandango and Summer looking annoyed.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

Cameron, Naomi, Eva Marie and Nikki Bella are here because this is the Total Divas match of the night. It’s weird seeing Natalya in regular gear instead of the leather she’s worn for years now. You can tell this is serious as they exchanged SLAPS on Raw. They fight over failed hiptoss attempts to start and it’s time for another slapoff. Brie has to bail to the floor to avoid the Sharpshooter so Nikki and Eva get in some cheating to take Natalya to the floor. The fans chant for JBL instead of this mess before quickly shifting over to the other announcers. Or maybe it’s an old Jerry Graham fan club.

Brie grabs the chinlock as the fans want tables. Egads the idea of the Total Divas crew trying to do something that complicated. The chinlock goes on again because that’s their best idea at the moment. Natalya fights out without much trouble but the Sharpshooter is countered with a rollup into the corner. The other four get in a fight on the floor and it’s a THIRD CHINLOCK in less than five minutes. Natalya breaks it up and, with the fans saying they want Ryder, slaps on the Sharpshooter for the win at 5:21.

Rating: D-. Any match that involves three chinlocks in less than five minutes is pretty self explanatory. There was no story here other than they were arguing about a reality show and that’s enough to get us here. The wrestling was pretty awful with the talented Natalya not being good enough to carry Brie. At least it was short, but this really had no business being on Summerslam.

Ryback, currently a bully, yells at catering about the soup being cold. It’s supposed to be, which Ryback knew of course. The soup goes down the chef’s shirt and then over his head. Ryback: “Feed me moron.” Make sure you catch his podcast so he can tell you how he came up with that entire idea and how it would have been a classic if WWE supported him.

We recap CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar. Punk was about to win Money in the Bank but Paul Heyman turned on him because Punk was nothing without him. Heyman brought Lesnar back in to destroy Punk, who had been Heyman’s friend and client for a long time. It’s a pretty easy tagline: The Best vs. The Beast. This was better than the UFC version: Former UFC Heavyweight Champion vs. The Miserable Failure.

CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar

No DQ. I know I say this a lot, but a fired up Lesnar is a terrifying human being. Punk shrugs off the shoulders in the corner to start so Lesnar just does them again. The CM PUNK chants begin and you can feel the energy in this one. A heck of a beal across the ring rocks Punk and it’s time for some choking in the corner. Punk manages a kick to the head and Lesnar is rocked, followed by some running knees to put him outside.

The suicide dive connects as I can’t help but look for the baseball sized growth on his back (it’s just hard not to). Punk tries the steps but Brock knocks them right back into him without much effort. Lesnar posts himself though and Punk scores with a top rope dive to stagger him again. The clothesline off the announcers’ table connects as well but Punk makes the mistake of going after Heyman. Lesnar LAUNCHES him over the table and Cole is declaring this one over already.

Back in and Punk starts kicking at the leg so Lesnar hits him in the face (don’t make it complicated). The bearhug stays on the ribs as you can’t fault Lesnar’s plan. Punk’s escape plan: hit Lesnar in the face. See? He’s learning too. Lesnar goes right back to the ribs and the slow pace continues. Another bearhug goes on and gets broken up by more shots to the face. Punk kicks him in the ribs and goes up, only to dive into a World’s Strongest Slam (giving us a great OH DANG IT face).

Some backbreakers get two as Punk’s ribs are being destroyed and we hit the chinlock. Punk bites the ear to escape and starts striking away, setting up a top rope knee to the face to FINALLY put Lesnar down. Some running knees in the corner connect and a kick to the head sets up the Macho Elbow (almost a splash) for a hot two. The GTS and F5 are both countered so Punk kicks him in the head again.

Another GTS attempt is countered into the Kimura but that’s reversed into a triangle choke. You just don’t do that to a power guy like Lesnar though, as he turns it over into a powerbomb….which doesn’t break anything. Lesnar powers up again though, this time into a heck of a running powerbomb for the real break. The delayed cover gets two and a ticked off Lesnar rolls some suplexes for two more.

Lesnar takes his sweet time going outside so Punk can get up top for a dive. That’s blocked by a raised chair, but Punk still drives it into Lesnar at the same time. That means Punk can beat the heck out of Lesnar with the chair and it’s Punk getting fired up this time. Back in and Punk hits him low, meaning it’s time to go up top for the Macho Elbow with the chair. Lesnar can’t get up (that’s a rare shot) so Punk hits him again, leaving Heyman to take the chair.

Brock is back up and grabs the F5 but Punk grabs Heyman’s tie for the block. Punk slips out and hits the GTS with Heyman having to make a save. The chase is on and Punk runs into the F5, which is countered into a DDT for two. The Anaconda Vice goes on, but since Lesnar’s legs aren’t kicking you know it’s not a finish. Heyman tries to come in with a chair….but Punk steps onto it. A right hand drops Heyman and Punk puts him in the Vice (like an idiot). Lesnar gets in the chair shot to Punk and the F5 onto the chair is good for the pin at 25:17.

Rating: A. Oh I loved this one all over again. The one part holding it back was Heyman getting involved once too often and Punk getting stupid by putting him in the Vice (he’s way too smart to get that caught up no matter what). Other than that, this was an incredible display of the underdog (who happens to be a multiple time World Champion) going after the unbeatable monster and getting dangerously close to stopping him. I was getting into the near falls here and that says a lot given that I knew how it was ending. Awesome stuff and the blueprint for how to have a smaller guy fight Lesnar.

Punk gets the big hero’s sendoff in what would be his last great match.

A fan took a Mark Henry splash for Summerslam tickets. I’d do it too. The fan and his friends will be ringside for the next match.

Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn vs. Big E. Langston/AJ Lee

Langston and Lee turned on Ziggler so he got Kaitlyn, who lost the Divas Title to AJ, on his side for this. It’s so strange seeing Big E. as his old self. The guys start and Big E. goes straight to an abdominal stretch to take over. It’s already off to the women with AJ kicking Kaitlyn in the face for two. The sleeper on Kaitlyn’s back keeps things slow and we look at the fans eating Doritos (sponsor).

Kaitlyn fights up and brings Ziggler back in for the dropkick and rapid fire elbow drops to Big E. Since they’re just elbows, Big E. is right back up with an over the shoulder backbreaker for two with Kaitlyn making the save. A hard running shoulder in the corner only hits post, leaving Kaitlyn to hit a heck of a spear to AJ on the floor (AJ always sold that perfectly). Big E. is fine enough to try the Big Ending but Ziggler reverses into the Zig Zag for the pin at 6:45.

Rating: D+. This was nothing but a way to let the crowd calm down a bit after the instant classic and there’s nothing wrong with being in that spot. Kaitlyn’s spear looked awesome and it was always cool to see Big E. throwing humans around like they were toys. The Ziggler push was already dying around this time but somehow he would still be kicking around in big spots six years later. WWE is funny/stupid in that way.

Fandango interrupts Miz one more time so Miz lays him out. Cole: “It’s Fan-DOWN-Go.” No Cole, it isn’t.

The Kickoff Panel does what Kickoff Panels do. In this case that means picking Daniel Bryan to beat John Cena for the title.

We recap Cena vs. Bryan. Cena was given the chance to pick his challenger for this show and selected Bryan, who had worked his way up the card like few others in recent years. Management hated the idea because Bryan wasn’t good enough and tried to give Bryan a corporate makeover. Bryan refused to cut his beard though because he was going to be himself. HHH, who has seemed to favor Bryan, is guest referee. Bryan and Cena have played up the sports entertainment vs. wrestling deal, which is exactly what this match should be about.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is challenging with HHH as guest referee. Cena is also sporting a massive growth on his elbow, which was leaving him desperately in need of surgery because it’s the size of a baseball. Bryan isn’t getting the superstar pops yet but he’s cheered more than Cena. We get the Big Match Intros and I had forgotten about Bryan’s THE BEARD IS HERE shirt. Cena grabs a headlock to start as they have a ton of time here.

Bryan rolls out with no trouble and it’s an early standoff. Back up and Cena tries a test of strength, which is blocked by a bridge. The YES Lock attempt sends Cena bailing to the floor and he tells the doctor that his arm is fine. Back in and Bryan takes him down into the surfboard knee stomp as Cena is in way over his head with the wrestling. Therefore, he runs Bryan over for a knock to the floor because power is his best bet. Cena follows him outside but gets sent into the steps, only to manage a suplex off the steps to put Bryan down again.

Back in and Cena whips him hard into the corner as Bryan has no answer for the power game just yet. A Batista Bomb gives Cena two and the chinlock goes on. Bryan fights up and forearms away, setting up some kicks in the corner to put Cena on defense again. The running clothesline drops Cena and you can feel the fans’ energy picking up. The YES Kicks connect but, as usual, the big one misses and Cena fires off the shoulders.

Cena takes too long with the Shuffle though and gets kicked in the head, only to come back with the ProtoBomb. Now the Shuffle connects but the AA doesn’t work just yet. Instead Bryan hits a missile dropkick for two as they’re going back and forth very well here. Over ten minutes in, Bryan finally goes after the BIG FREAKING BULGE on his arm to take over. Cena tries the STF but Bryan kicks away and grabs one of his own. The rope is grabbed so Bryan hits a pair of German suplexes for a pair of twos.

Now it’s off to the YES Lock but Cena slips out, earning himself a guillotine choke instead. That’s countered with a backdrop into the corner (cool) and they’re both down for a second. Cena grabs the AA out of nowhere for two and they’re down a bit longer. With nothing working, Cena goes up but Bryan catches him with the running forearms to stagger him. Bryan superplexes him down but hangs on to stay up top for a cool visual.

The Swan Dive connects for two so Cena runs him over with the clothesline for two of his own. Cole mentions that HHH is referee, marking the most significant HHH portion of the match over twenty minutes in. Cena’s super AA is blocked by elbows to the head but Cena blocks the super hurricanrana. That means jumping down and dropping Bryan on top of his head in a botch I had forgotten about so the cringing is strong. The STF goes on with Bryan rolling over to take off some of the pressure.

Bryan manages to reverse into the YES Lock until Cena makes the rope. The running corner dropkicks have Cena in more trouble so he comes out of the corner with the hard clothesline to turn Bryan inside out. The slugout it on until they both hit flying shoulders for another double knockdown. Bryan wins the next slugout but the moonsault out of the corner is caught on Cena’s shoulders. That’s countered into a DDT and they’re both down again. Bryan tries a high crossbody but gets caught in the AA. It’s reversed again and Bryan kicks him in the head, setting up the debuting running knee for the pin and the title at 26:54.

Rating: A+. I go back and forth on which of the two big matches I like more and this time around I liked the story that much more. Bryan debuting the running knee to win is still one of my favorite things in a long time as it came out of nowhere and makes the move look devastating right off the bat. They had a great battle of styles here with both guys sticking with their respective specialties until Bryan broke down the machine through heart and determination, plus some awesome strikes. I had a great time with this one and it was one of the best matches I’ve seen in a good while.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is defending as well as out so Orton wins the title in eight seconds. There’s your major story over the next eight months and yes I still believe that Bryan winning the title at Wrestlemania was the plan all along (details to be determined).

Overall Rating: A-. This is one of those shows where the good is excellent and the rest just exists. That being said, with the two awesome main events and a rather good Del Rio vs. Christian match, you have a seven match card (leaving out the cash-in match) with three of them receiving some rather high praise. That’s about as good as you can get and it’s one of the better shows in recent memory. Yeah the other four matches range from bad to rather bad, but their times combined are about equal to the main event. Excellent show and worth your time (as in less than three hours) to see.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-
2014 Redo: B-
2017 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

Original: D+

2014 Redo: D

2017 Redo: F+

2019 Redo: F

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: C

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: D

Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Original: B+

2014 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

2019 Redo: B

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Original: F

2014 Redo: D-

2017 Redo: D-

2019 Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Dolph Ziggler/AJ Lee

Original: C-

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: D+

Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: N/A

2014 Redo: N/A

2017 Redo: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A-

2014 Redo: A

2017 Redo: A-

2019 Redo: A-

Was I in a really bad mood when I watched the Kickoff Show in 2017? And I’m all over the place with Cody vs. Sandow. Other than that, it’s pretty much the definitive set of ratings here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Smackdown – March 4, 2022: They Had To Do That

Smackdown
Date: March 4, 2022
Location: FTX Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We are less than a month away from Wrestlemania and the card is starting to come together. There are still some gaps that need to be filled in but now tonight we might have a better idea of how some of the title scene will look. This week features two title matches which could see some shakeups. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Paul Heyman talks about being the advocate for Roman Reigns, who will be here tonight.

Ronda Rousey is ready for her first Smackdown match.

Sonya Deville is ready to teach Rousey about authority.

The Viking Raiders are ready to hunt the Usos, rip them apart, and take the Tag Team Titles.

The Usos say the Vikings are fat.

Ricochet says he’s taking the Intercontinental Title from Sami Zayn.

Sami Zayn lists off his monikers and says after tonight, people will be talking about him being the best Intercontinental Champion.

Intercontinental Title: Ricochet vs. Sami Zayn

Ricochet is challenging and grabs a very fast rollup for two to start. Sami hits a running clothesline to slow him down and then suplexes Ricochet down on the apron as we take a break. Back with Ricochet snapping off a middle rope hurricanrana for two but Sami grabs a sitout powerbomb (with Ricochet landing hard) for two. Ricochet sends him outside and hits a handspring moonsault to take Sami down again.

Back in and Ricochet gets crotched on top, sending him outside in a crash. Cue Johnny Knoxville because of course here he is again, with Sami being distracted by the INTERCONTINENTAL CHUMP shirt. It’s enough of a distraction that Ricochet can grab a standing hurricanrana for the pin and the title at 7:35.

Rating: C+. Well ok then. I would not have have bet on that one but they had a surprise here with the title change. That is the kind of thing that they have been needing to do for Ricochet for a long time and if it means he gets a Wrestlemania title defense out of it, good for him. I know Knoxville vs. Zayn is coming, probably at Wrestlemania, but you can do that without the title just as well. I was surprised in a good way here so well done.

We look at Vince McMahon on the Pat McAfee Show, where he announced that he will be inducting the Undertaker into the Hall of Fame. He also offered McAfee a Wrestlemania match, which McAfee accepted.

Sami Zayn is losing his mind over Johnny Knoxville following him everywhere from Smackdown to social media. How about Knoxville follows him to Wrestlemania?

Cole asks McAfee who he will be facing at Wrestlemania but here is Austin Theory to interrupt. Theory introduces himself to the crowd and asks McAfee why Mr. McMahon was on his show. He finds it funny that McAfee thinks McMahon likes him (which makes McAfee laugh). Will McAfee be so happy when his jaw is wired shut?

Theory gets in his face and then slaps him, with Theory saying they’re facing off at Wrestlemania. Theory leaves and McAfee stands on the announcers’ table, telling him to come back here. With Theory gone, McAfee goes on a rant about how he was embarrassed in front of Miami and blames Michael Cole for what happened.

Naomi vs. Carmella

Sasha Banks and Queen Zelina are here too. Carmella gets her mask put on but Naomi wastes no time in kicking her in the face. Carmella is still fine enough to pull her off the top and into a chinlock, which Naomi breaks up in a hurry. Banks cuts off Zelina’s interference and it’s the split legged moonsault to give Naomi the pin at 2:07.

Happy Corbin beats Madcap Moss and some others at poker while bragging about his Wrestlemania success. That will keep going at Wrestlemania, when he beats Drew McIntyre. Moss gives us a McIntyre impression with his usual level of humor.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura have another Toyota Tundra commercial, this time hiking through the woods.

Drew McIntyre vs. Jinder Mahal

Shanky is here with Mahal. McIntyre gets knocked down for an early neck crank as McAfee continues to go after Cole for possibly having something to do with Theory earlier. That’s broken up and McIntyre starts hammering away until a Shanky distraction cuts him off. McIntyre takes care of him, setting up the Glasgow Kiss into the Claymore to finish Mahal at 2:04.

Post match McIntyre says he doesn’t care what Madcap Moss and Happy Corbin do. McIntyre asks for a show of hands of how many people want to gouge their eyes out when Corbin is on TV. The fans go up, including Kayla Braxton’s. McIntyre is taking Corbin out at Wrestlemania.

Back at the poker game, Corbin doesn’t like Moss’ jokes.

McAfee is very happy that Ronda Rousey is wrestling tonight.

We look back at last week’s contract signing between Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura are coming to the ring but the Usos jump them from behind and lay them out. Cue Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman so the Bloodline can go to the ring for a chat. Miami seems very happy to see and acknowledge Reigns, who talks about how he and Brock Lesnar are defending their titles at Madison Square Garden. You already know he is going to smash someone and send them to the back of the line like he has done for a year and a half.

Then you have Lesnar, and not all of us want to see him with that title, or even at Wrestlemania. Reigns wants him to be champion at Wrestlemania though, because he wants Lesnar to hand over the title. Heyman talks about spoilers, so maybe we should give Miami a spoiler. Reigns calls his shot like Babe Ruth and he delivers every single time. The spoiler is that at Wrestlemania, he is pinning Brock Lesnar and Lesnar will acknowledge him. Reigns seemed to snap a bit with that one and Cole thinks Lesnar is in his head.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Viking Raiders

The Raiders are challenging and the Usos are sent outside to start. Ivar dives off the apron to take both of them down, setting up the top rope splash for two on Jimmy in a very near fall. Jey breaks up the Viking Experience and the champs drop the Vikings out to the floor. Ivar gets posted and Erik gets tossed down hard as we take a break. Back with Jimmy’s Superfly Splash hitting Erik’s raised knees and the Viking Experience connects, with Jey making another save. Some superkicks get two on Erik but he reverses into a cradle for the same. The 1D connects to retain the Usos’ titles at 8:20.

Rating: B-. This was almost all action but what mattered the most was I bought into the near falls. There were multiple times where I thought the titles were going to change hands and that is proof they are doing something right. I’m going to assume that Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura are up next for the Usos and that could make for an interesting match, especially since it isn’t like there are any other fresh challengers for the titles.

Earlier today, New Day rode around backstage on Big E.’s ATV.

Sheamus vs. Big E.

Ridge Holland and Kofi Kingston are here too, with Kofi getting on the ATV before the bell. Holland chairs him from behind and then chairs the ATV. Sheamus chop blocks Big E. and he and Holland steal the ATV. No match.

During the break, Sheamus and Holland destroyed the ATV.

We look back at Ricochet winning the Intercontinental Title.

Johnny Knoxville accepts Sami Zayn’s Wrestlemania challenge.

Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss are playing darts when Drew McIntyre stabs the board with his sword to run them off.

We look back at Ronda Rousey’s interview last week, with Charlotte and Sonya Deville interrupting to take her out.

Ronda Rousey vs. Sonya Deville

Charlotte comes out to watch and the distraction lets Deville go after Rousey’s bad knee. The chinlock goes on as Charlotte sits in on commentary. Rousey fights up and chokes away in the ropes, setting up Piper’s Pit. The armbar finishes Deville at 3:12.

Rating: C-. That’s all it needed to be with Rousey shrugging off whatever Deville had and then beating her with the armbar as expected. Rousey needed to look dominant like this as she should be ready for Wrestlemania and the showdown with Charlotte. The good thing is that someone like Rousey doesn’t need much reheating and she is all but ready for the title match from here.

Post match Rousey calls Charlotte into the ring and actually gets what she wants, setting up an ankle lock (playing off Charlotte talking about Rousey being a one trick pony with the armbar) to make Charlotte tap to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a show that is going to get some mixed reviews because there wasn’t much in the way of wrestling, but they did take some steps towards Wrestlemania. Two more matches have been set and that is something that WWE has been needing to do for several weeks now. The Tag Team Title match was good and I liked the title change so the show did cover some important points outside of just Wrestlemania. Pretty good show, as it did some things that needed to be done.

Results
Ricochet b. Sami Zayn – Hurricanrana
Naomi b. Carmella – Split legged moonsault
Drew McIntyre b. Jinder Mahal – Claymore
Usos b. Viking Raiders – 1D to Erik
Ronda Rousey b. Sonya Deville – Armbar

 

 

 

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Smackdown – February 11, 2022: They Picked It Up

Smackdown
Date: February 11, 2022
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Corey Graves, Michael Cole

We have less than ten days before Elimination Chamber and the only big thing on the Smackdown side is Goldberg vs. Roman Reigns. That might not sound too appealing, but that’s what the people paying for Elimination Chamber want to see. Other than that, we have the fallout from Ronda Rousey destroying Sonya Deville and choosing to face Charlotte at Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Here is Smackdown if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Ronda Rousey picking Charlotte for Wrestlemania and also taking out Sonya Deville for a bonus.

Here is Sonya Deville, with her arm in a sling, to say she is tired of people disrespecting her. There will be consequences for the actions of people like Ronda Rousey and Naomi. Therefore, she has requested that Rousey be fined $100,000 and suspended indefinitely. Cue Adam Pearce to say Vince McMahon has responded to her request via email.

Said email says that Vince doesn’t like someone abusing their authority, so not only is the request denied, but if Sonya gets involved in Naomi vs. Charlotte, her job will be….IN SERIOUS JEOPARDY. Cue Naomi to say that Sonya can’t touch her, but Naomi can do this. A loud slap drops Sonya, who is not happy.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

We look back at Kofi Kingston/Big E. taking out Los Lotharios in a pretty good match last week.

Big E./Kofi Kingston vs. Los Lotharios

After a quick chat in the back about how great Los Lotharios are and the Los Lotharios Kiss Cam, we’re ready to go. Big E. cranks on a headlock to Angel before Kofi comes in with a splash for two. It’s off to Angel, who takes Kofi into the corner for some crossface shots to the jaw. Humberto adds some forearms to the back but Kingston sweeps his leg out. That’s enough to set up Big E.’s apron splash and there’s the big dive to take Los Lotharios out at the same time.

We come back from a break with Angel pounding on Big E. and TAKING OFF HIS (own) PANTS. Big E. gets up and brings in Kofi as everything breaks down. A top rope double stomp/powerbomb combination gets two on Humberto with Angel making the save. Angel hits a Backstabber and sends Big E. outside for a moonsault (with his leg smacking Big E. in the head). Another moonsault press gives Humberto two on Kofi but he’s back up with Trouble in Paradise. Kofi tries a tornado DDT out of the corner but Garza slips off and stacks Kofi up for the clean pin at 10:24.

Rating: B-. Remember last week when New Day beat Los Lotharios? Well this is the same thing but the opposite, because WWE loves doing this kind of thing. The good thing is that the match worked a little better than their usual efforts, as WWE has a bad tendency to run nothing matches back in a trilogy for some weird reason. Odds are this gets a third try, as the tag division continues to spin its wheels.

The Usos jump the Viking Raiders and leave them laying.

We look back at Goldberg returning and challenging Roman Reigns for Elimination Chamber.

We get a sitdown interview with Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman. Neither of them seem overly worried about Goldberg, with Reigns saying that if he was in WCW when Goldberg had his winning streak, WCW would still be in business. After a clip of Goldberg squashing Brock Lesnar at Survivor Series 2016, Reigns laughs them off as old news. Reigns doesn’t think much of the idea that he and Goldberg were supposed to fight two years ago at Wrestlemania. He wants to slap Goldberg in the face and get him out of here again. Preach it brother.

Recap of Aliyah vs. Natalya, with Aliyah beating her three times in a row.

Aliyah vs. Natalya

Pinfall or submission only. Natalya shoulders her down to start and they dive over each other a few times. A Michinoku Driver gives Natalya two but Aliyah is back with a Thesz press. Natalya shrugs that off and puts on the Sharpshooter, sending Aliyah to the ropes. That has no impact though as there are no disqualifications, meaning Aliyah has to tap at 2:40. So Aliyah beat her and beat her and beat her and then lost. Got it.

Post match Natalya stays on her but Xia Li runs in for the save.

We get a Rock narrated video on Rocky Johnson for Black History Month.

It’s time for InZayn, but first we see Johnny Knoxville wrecking a bunch of Sami Zayn merchandise earlier today. Sami says he’s on to bigger things like getting his Intercontinental Title back, which doesn’t go over so well with the crowd. The booing doesn’t work on a podcast so Zayn promises then vegan creole recipes for later. That brings out his guests, Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura, with Sami promising to take the title last week.

Nakamura asks if Sami saw the movie, meaning Jackass Defeated, which comes out next week. Sami doesn’t think much of Boogs, who can lift all the weights he wants. Boogs reaches for the microphone….and gets electrocuted, sending him down into the corner. Nakamura goes to check on him and gets jumped by Sami, who leaves them both laying. After that live electrocution, we’re ready to move on.

We look back at Drew McIntyre taking out Madcap Moss last week.

Madcap Moss, with a black eye, says he can’t be in Happy Corbin’s corner this week.

Happy Corbin vs. Cesaro

Corbin takes him into the corner to start and starts the pounding. Deep Six cuts off the Cesaro comeback but he sends Corbin into the corner as well. That means the slide under the ropes but they fight to the floor, with Cesaro hitting a running uppercut. Back in and Cesaro hits the springboard corkscrew uppercut for two but Corbin grabs the End of Days at 3:58.

Rating: C. This was a match where they didn’t have a chance to do much and Cesaro was there to make Corbin look good. You need to keep Corbin strong for the Wrestlemania match with Drew McIntyre, because that’s what we’ll be seeing for some reason. Corbin is better without Madcap Moss, but egads I could go for something other than Corbin for McIntyre.

We go to Madcap Moss getting his eye looked at when Drew McIntyre comes in. He knows Moss’ eye is ok, which is why their match at Elimination Chamber is now Falls Count Anywhere.

Charlotte is ready to retain the Women’s Title.

We get a sitdown interview with Goldberg and Michael Cole, who Goldberg says he loves like a brother. Goldberg promises that this is a comeback that will bring back the old him. It’s two years in the making, ten years in the making or fifteen years in the making. Reigns has promised to “Goldberg Goldberg”, but Goldberg promises to make Reigns acknowledge him.

Here’s the opening segment again.

Sheamus was the honorary starter at a NASCAR race.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Naomi

Naomi is challenging and Sonya Deville can’t get involved. Charlotte runs her over to start but Naomi is back up with a whip into the corner. An enziguri sends Charlotte outside and there’s a slingshot corkscrew dive to send us to a break. Back with Naomi in trouble but managing to catch her with a high crossbody for two. The Figure Four necklock is broken up so Charlotte chops away instead. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gives Charlotte two more and she bends Naomi’s back around the post.

Back in and Naomi manages some kicks to the head, setting up a Blockbuster for two more. They head outside with Charlotte sending her into the steps for a crash as we take another break. Back again with Naomi fighting out of a chinlock and hitting another springboard spinning kick to the face. A bulldog drives Charlotte face first into the middle turnbuckle but Charlotte plants her with a powerbomb for two of her own.

The double moonsault hits raised knees though and Naomi hits the Rear View for a very close two. Naomi loads up the split legged moonsault but hits raised knees as well to give Charlotte two more. A (not great) rollup gives Naomi another near fall and she plants Charlotte with a headscissors driver. Now the split legged moonsault connects for two, as the fans are WAY into these near falls. Some forearms have Charlotte in trouble and a kick to the head staggers her again. Another Rear View misses though and the Natural Selection retains the title at 19:50.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but they were rolling by the end, especially after the second break. They had some great near falls with Naomi getting so close to the title before falling short. One of the good things about Charlotte losing her title over and over is that there is a chance she could lose the title here and then get it back to set up the Wrestlemania title match all over again. Heck of a match here and worth a look.

Post match Sonya Deville is here to go after Naomi, with Charlotte coming back in to kick Naomi in the face. The beatdown is on until Ronda Rousey runs in for the save.

Overall Rating: B. They had some good stuff here, with the wrestling being solid for the most part, including a pretty awesome main event. The setback here was the focus on Goldberg vs. Roman Reigns, which isn’t exactly enthralling. At least they kept the Goldberg segment short, because talking really isn’t his thing. The main event really pulled this up, though the bad things kept the show from hitting that much higher level.

Results
Los Lotharios b. Kofi Kingston/Big E. – Rollup to Kingston
Natalya b. Aliyah – Sharpshooter
Happy Corbin b. Cesaro – End of Days
Charlotte b. Naomi – Natural Selection

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – January 10, 2022: That Was Really Stupid

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 10, 2022
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We are less than three weeks away from the Royal Rumble and the show is starting to come together. It seems that we have a pair of World Title matches and a good number of names set for both Royal Rumble matches. There are still some things that need to be done though and some of that should be taken care of tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Brock Lesnar becoming WWE Champion at Day One and Bobby Lashley becoming #1 contender last week.

Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman, with Bobby Lashley and MVP watching backstage. The Hurt Business comes up to Lashley and are glad to have the team back together. Lashley says not so fast because he works alone, with MVP nodding in agreement. Back in the arena, Heyman does the intro and Lesnar is happy to be here.

Cue Lashley and MVP to interrupt and the staredowns are on. MVP handles Lashley’s intro so Lashley can talk to Lesnar face to face. Lashley says Lesnar has been ducking him for twenty years, with Lesnar saying it is an honor for him (as in Lesnar) to be in the ring with him (as in Lesnar). Brock talks about winning titles all over the world in different rings, so it’s Lashley’s fault that they never met each other.

Lesnar asks how many threads MVP’s suit is, with Lesnar saying he is funny and money. He calls Heyman over and says…..knock knock. Heyman: “Brock Lesnar is doing a knock knock joke in Philadelphia. I thought I had seen it all. Who’s there?” Bobby. Heyman: “Bobby who?” EXACTLY! Lesnar calls Lashley a Brock Lesnar wannabe and walks away. Cue Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander to jump Lashley but he leaves them laying in a hurry.

Riddle is trying to get ready for their Tag Team Title match but Randy Orton tells him to be serious. Orton writes TAG IN RANDY on Riddle’s hands and starts heading to the ring. Hold on though, as Riddle needs to know if Orton is a Pat’s or Geno’s guy. Orton picks Geno’s (cheesesteak place) and we’re ready to go.

Tag Team Titles: RKBro vs. Alpha Academy

RKBro is defending. Riddle tries to wrestle with Gable and gets taken down in a hurry. An armbar doesn’t work so well for Riddle as Gable is right in the ropes before it can get anywhere. Riddle knocks Gable outside and hits a big springboard Floating Bro to take him out as we take a break.

Back with Gable hitting a dragon screw legwhip on Riddle and handing it off to Otis. The Floating Bro gets Riddle out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Orton to clean house. Gable gets crotched on top and the top rope superplex brings him right back down. Otis makes a blind tag though and the World’s Strongest Slam to Orton gives Otis the pin and the titles at 9:24.

Rating: C+. This was an interesting story as they were telling the story of Orton being the big savior for the team but he took the fall anyway. I’m curious about where this is going for RKBro, as the team didn’t need the titles anymore, but I’m not sure what they are doing without them. I don’t want them to split, but what else is there for them to do in WWE logic?

Damian Priest is in the Royal Rumble.

Priest and the Street Profits are ready for a six man tonight but they’re also ready to go after each other in the Rumble. For now though, they want the smoke.

Bianca Belair is ready to get the next shot at Becky Lynch.

Street Profits/Damian Priest vs. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode/Apollo Crews

Ford jumps over Crews to start so it’s off to Ziggler, who gets hit in the face. Priest comes in and cleans house, with the villains being knocked outside without much trouble. We take a break and come back with Crews gorilla pressing Ford. Ziggler’s chinlock doesn’t last long as Ford fights up and brings in Dawkins to clean house. Everything breaks down and Ford hits a big flip dive to the floor. That leaves Ziggler to Zig Zag Dawkins for the pin at 9:24.

Rating: C. I’m rather glad that we’re in for the annual Ziggler semipush, which continues to happen for reasons I do not quite understand. I can’t imagine it goes anywhere in the Royal Rumble, but it’s not like he and Roode are winning the Tag Team Titles anytime soon. Fine enough six man, but it came and went with Ziggler winning, so not much to get behind here.

Smackdown Rebound.

We recap the opening segment.

Here is a dancing Seth Rollins for a chat. Rollins is happy to see Bobby Lashley and Brock Lesnar hit each other a lot because he’ll be ready to take the Universal Title from Roman Reigns. Cue Big E. to interrupt and make a reference to the Philadelphia Flyers’ mascot, which Rollins doesn’t get. Big E. gets to the point and enters the Royal Rumble so he can win the title back at Wrestlemania. Rollins laughs it off so Big E. thinks they should face off tonight. Actually let’s just do it right now. Rollins wants a referee out here and the bell rings.

Big E. vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins starts fast with a dropkick but gets caught in a powerslam. Big E. gets knocked outside for a dive though and the fight heads to the floor. That’s fine with Big E., who hits the apron splash and we take a break. Back with Rollins slipping out of a powerslam attempt and taking Big E. down into a chinlock. That’s broken up and Big E. hits the Rock Bottom out of the corner but Rollins headbutts his way out of a belly to belly.

Big E. sends him to the apron and hits the spear to the floor as we take a break. Back with Big E. fighting up and snapping off the belly to belly suplexes. The Warrior splash connects but Rollins escapes another Rock Bottom out of the corner. Rollins hits a frog splash for two but Big E. powerbombs him down.

A Stretch Muffler goes on, sending Rollins straight to the ropes. Big E. plants him again for two more but another spear through the ropes hits knee. That means Rollins can go up, where he has to escape a super Big Ending. Big E. can’t hit a regular version either so Rollins has to miss a Pedigree attempt as well. Some forearms put Big E. down and there’s the Stomp for the pin at 17:56.

Rating: B. This got into a groove of the big fight feel as these two beat on each other rather well. It’s a good win for Rollins, but Big E. continues to fall rather quickly. I don’t think he’s getting back to the title picture anytime soon, and unfortunately that is not the biggest surprise. He had his run, WWE decided that the bad results were his fault, and here we are again. At least they built Rollins up well for Reigns, which should be good.

We look at the big announcement of most of the women’s Royal Rumble field.

Here are Rhea Ripley and Nikki ASH for a chat. Nikki seems to be ok with last week’s loss but Ripley doesn’t want to talk about it. That’s not cool with Nikki, because they are going to talk about it right now. Nikki doesn’t want to split up the team but Ripley thinks it’s time to go their own ways. They can get the titles back, but Ripley says it’s not about that. Nikki: “You think you’re so much better than me?”

That’s not what Ripley said but Nikki meant that she’s the better one. It’s great to know where Rhea’s head is, which is enough to make her leave. Ripley turns back to face her and the team seems to be done, but we do get a hug. Then Nikki turns on her and the beatdown is on, with Nikki saying superheroes don’t need friends. I’m glad WWE FINALLY seems to be giving up on this stupid gimmick, but forgive me for not being emotional about a split between a team that got together less than five months ago.

Reggie has cheesteaks for himself and Dana Brooke, but he thinks someone is going after the 24/7 Title. Cue R-Truth with a trashcan containing Akira Tozawa, so Brooke and Reggie throw their food at….Tamina, who freaks out and turns over the trashcan. Excuse me for one second.

THIS STUFF IS FREAKING STUPID AND NO ONE CARES ABOUT THE 24/7 TITLE!!!

Anyway, Reggie and Brooke run off, with Reggie running into Omos. Dana says let him down, which Omos actually does, albeit with a threat to Reggie. Oh and for a bonus: today happens to be Tamina’s birthday. Thank goodness they came up with LET’S THROW FOOD AT HER.

Doudrop, now with a lot of makeup, wants the Raw Women’s Title.

Omos vs. Nick Sanders

Chokeslam and fireman’s carry drop connect, as Dana Brooke and Reggie watch in the back. The chokebomb finishes at 1:33.

We recap the opening segment, including Bobby Lashley wrecking the former Hurt Business.

Here is Edge for the Cutting Edge. We get straight to the point as he has what he describes as the most gorgeous and curvaceous guest he has ever had: the owner of thighs that could crack a coconut, Beth Phoenix. They’re ready to do some damage to Miz and Maryse at the Royal Rumble because Beth would fit in with the Broad Street Bullies (Philadelphia Flyers reference).

They have more titles between themselves than any other couple in WWE history, including Miz and Maryse. We see a video on Beth Phoenix’s career, including various wrestlers talking about her career and accomplishments. Edge gives her the floor and says if Edge was trying to butter her up for later, flattery will get you everywhere. Beth: “Down boy, down boy.” Beth is ready to destroy Miz and Maryse, who are just annoying.

Cue Miz and Maryse to insult Philadelphia and be ready to take car of Beth and Edge at the Royal Rumble. Edge mocks Miz for hiding behind Maryse to avoid the spear. Miz isn’t hearing it and has his own highlight video on Maryse. Back in the arena, Miz brags about what Maryse has done, but Miz and Beth respect the heck out of her. Edge: “But my wife can bench press a Buick.” Beth finds it funny that Maryse hasn’t been so eager to get involved now that Beth is back.

The time for apologies is long gone, and it is time to wreck Maryse for good, with the fans chanting au revoir. Miz laughs it off and tells Maryse to tell Beth what is going to happen at the Royal Rumble. Maryse walks off while Miz is hyping her up though, so Beth volunteers to beat Miz up at the Rumble instead. This feud isn’t that good as I’m not sure how much of a demand there was for Miz and Edge to fight in the first place, but there is even less for the mixed tag. I’m sure the match will be good, but it’s kind of hard to get interested.

Austin Theory is ready to beat AJ Styles to impress Vince McMahon.

We look at the Tag Team Title change.

AJ Styles vs. Austin Theory

Styles starts fast with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker but Theory grabs a suplex for two. Back up and Styles dropkicks him to the floor but gets sent outside for his efforts. Theory’s dropkick looks even better and we take a break. Back with Styles slamming him down for two but having to check his tooth. Theory grabs a brainbuster onto the knee for two but Styles gets to the apron….where Grayson Waller jumps him for the DQ at 7:02.

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to go very far but at least we got the Grayson Waller portion of the match. Sarcasm aside, this is a wisely set up segment, as you don’t want Styles losing twice in a row and you don’t want Theory getting pinned. It also set up another rmatch while keeping people strong, which is about as good as you could have done here.

Post match the beatdown is on but Styles clears the ring.

We go backstage to look at the curtain into the arena….and nothing happens. There’s your production gaffe, but then we catch up with Waller heading through the curtain and saying AJ is getting taken over tomorrow night.

Liv Morgan is tired of getting so close to winning but coming up short. She’s never giving up though.

Alexa Bliss is in therapy but can’t be fixed until she is willing to open up. We get a flashback of her time as the female Fiend, which makes her feel thirsty. She pours the entire pitcher of water and then breaks a bunch of stuff in the office. See you next week doc. Bliss has been gone for four months and the best thing they can think of is “let’s do the same thing”. What a brilliant idea.

Becky Lynch (who had to stand in the arena while the Bliss segment aired) isn’t woried about any of her potential challengers but will sit in on commentary for the match anyway.

Doudrop vs. Liv Morgan vs. Bianca Belair

They all punch each other to start until Doudrop suplexes Belair down hard. The two of them head outside so Morgan flip dives onto them. Back in and Doudrop crushes Liv in the corner but Belair breaks it up. Doudrop crushes both of them with a basement crossbody before dropping Morgan onto belair for a double cover. The chinlock has Liv in trouble but she fights up and gets sent over the top for a crash into the steps.

We take a break and come back with Doudrop missing a charge into the corner and getting rolled up to give Morgan two. Morgan grabs the Rings of Saturn on Belair, who powers out after some hard pulling. Belair gets sent into the corner but Doudrop powerbombs Morgan hard. Belair breaks up the cover with a 450 before the one count and plants both of them down. The handspring moonsault hit both of them and the KOD gets….no count as Becky runs in for the save. Becky and Belair fight so Doudrop can hit a Banzai drop to pin Morgan at 14:42.

Rating: C-. This could have been a lot worse and the best thing is they gave us a surprise winner. The problem continues to be that none of these three feel like they are worthy of challenging Lynch. It didn’t help that Lynch wasn’t exactly sounding inspired on commentary, leaving us with a long but not that interesting match. At least Doudrop got the win and that gives us a fresh match for a change.

Post match Doudrop shoves Becky out to the floor to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There were two segments on this show that ruined an otherwise pretty good night. We had some good action and some story development as the Rumble gets closer, but then things had to fall apart. Between Reggie and Dana Brooke throw food at Tamina and Alexa Bliss is in therapy, I don’t remember getting this annoyed at Raw in a long time. It feels like it’s from another planet and is inserted into what is an otherwise good show. That crippled almost any interesting I had in the show and that tends to happen far too often on Raw. Overall it’s a good show, but the bad stuff on here is really bad.

Results
Alpha Academy b. RKBro – World’s Strongest Slam to Orton
Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode/Apollo Crews b. Street Profits/Damian Priest – Zig Zag to Dawkins
Seth Rollins b. Big E. – Stomp
Omos b. Nick Sanders – Chokebomb
AJ Styles b. Austin Theory via DQ when Grayson Waller interfered
Doudrop b. Bianca Belair and Liv Morgan – Banzai Drop to Morgan

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




Monday Night Raw – January 3, 2022: Day Three Isn’t As Good

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 3, 2022
Location: Bon Secours Wellness Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the show after Day One and since it’s WWE, Brock Lesnar has now somehow become WWE Champion. Lesnar has been added to the fatal four way after his scheduled match with Roman Reigns was canceled due to Reigns testing positive for the Coronavirus. That means it’s time for a new direction so let’s get to it.

Here is Day One if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Brock Lesnar winning the WWE Title on Saturday night.

Opening sequence.

We run down the card.

The lights go out and a rather happy looking Paul Heyman is in the ring. As an advocate, Heyman would like to introduce us to his client: the new WWE Champion, BROCK LESNAR! Here is Lesnar, who throws some steps in the ring so he can stand up and send good wishes to Roman Reigns. Lesnar: “Now, South Carolina, acknowledge me!” He thanks Heyman for all of his efforts to make the title win possible on Saturday.

Heyman: “You should see the things behind the scenes in WWE.” He is the one who made Lesnar a free agent and then got Lesnar into a title match. Tonight we have a fatal four way, starting with Seth Rollins and Kevin Owens, who want to work as a team. You have Rollins, who is a visionary, but he’s too stupid to know that his wife is leaving him after he wins the WWE Title. Who is she leaving him for? It won’t be Owens, because he can’t beat Lesnar either.

Maybe they should be traded to Smackdown for Roman Reigns, who is vulnerable without his special counsel. Heyman: “One week without his special counsel, Roman Reigns already has Corona.” Let’s talk about MVP….or not, because no one else is. Bobby Lashley is a worthy challenger and it’s true that the two of them have not met until last Saturday at Day One. That night, Lashley speared him in half and put Lesnar in the Hurt Lock, and as Heyman told Lesnar to his face, it didn’t look like Lesnar was getting out.

Those shots were all from behind though, but if Lashley wins tonight, he is going to face Lesnar one on one. Then there is Big E., who they have nothing against whatsoever. Big E. was an honorable champion and it would be an honor to beat Big E. Heyman: “You’re going to lose, but it would be an honor.” Heyman hasn’t lost a step as Lesnar’s mouthpiece and it felt like he had been dying to manage Lesnar again.

Riddle comes up to Randy Orton (ignore that he did this before the commercial and then left) and talks about meeting Migos at Day One. They should start their own rap group! Orton makes him hand over the sunglasses and gold chains before saying to remember their New Year’s resolution: listen to Randy more. This turns into a quick rap from Riddle and it’s time to go to the ring.

RKBro vs. Alpha Academy

Non-title. We see a recap of RKBro retaining over the Street Profits at Day One and come back to Chad Gable talking about his education. He calls Otis a tree trunk, which I believe Orton called Otis in their pre-match promo. Gable promises the title reign is about to end and the brawl is on before the bell, with Riddle being launched with a belly to belly.

We take a break and come back in progress with Gable suplexing Riddle (whose toenails are painted). Otis comes in with a gorilla press for two but Riddle manages to toss him away. A kick to the head looks to set up the hot tag but Gable pulls Orton off the apron. Otis splashes Riddle, who is right back with a running knee. The RKO is countered into a World’s Strongest Slam though and Riddle is done at 2:55.

Bobby Lashley says Brock Lesnar fears him.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Omos, from their debut through their breakup.

Omos puts his hand on an interviewer’s face and doesn’t seem to want to answer questions.

24/7 Title: Akira Tozawa/Tamina vs. Reggie/Dana Brooke

Brooke is defending and it’s not clear how she can lose the title here. The guys start things off and Tozawa accidentally kicks Tamina in the face. Tamina knocks him down and Reggie hits the running flipping seated senton for the pin at 1:16, retaining Brooke’s title. Brooke was never in the match.

We recap Becky Lynch surviving against Liv Morgan at Day One.

Here is Becky Lynch for a chat. Becky talks about how it is a new year and a lot of people think that means a new them. Their to do lists include “become the Raw Women’s Champion” but the top of hers says “remain Raw Women’s Champion”. She realizes that she has become a work of art and that makes her WWE’s Vincent Van Goat.

Becky hates to break it to you, but you’re not losing that ten pounds or getting that promotion. As for everyone in the back, including Liv Morgan, you’re not taking this title from her. Cue Liv Morgan to insult Becky’s jacket (Becky: “I like this jacket.”) and call her delusional. No one is harder on Liv than herself and she will never give up on her dream.

Cue Bianca Belair to say Liv isn’t the EST so Becky mocks both of them. Liv calls out Becky for not being in the women’s locker room in years but Belair cuts Liv off. Becky tells them to figure this out one on one but they jump Becky instead. Belair and Liv fight until Becky breaks it up and leaves them laying. So Becky has beaten them both more than once and now she beat them both up at once. What a way to make me care about the likely title match.

Kevin Owens comes up to Seth Rollins and says they can work together tonight and then take the title from Brock Lesnar. It doesn’t matter who wins, because then they can fight for the title at Wrestlemania. Rollins loves the plan because they can trust each other. Rollins leaves and Owens asks if he’s lying.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Rhea Ripley/Nikki Ash vs. Queen Zelina/Carmella

Carmella/Vega are defending. Ripley suplexes Vega down to start and it’s off to Nikki to take her down again. Vega comes back with a knockdown of her own into a chinlock. Nikki fights up but Vega grabs a cradle to retain at 2:34.

Johnny Knoxville is going to be in the Royal Rumble.

Street Profits vs. Apollo Crews/Commander Azeez

Before the match, the Profits officially enter the Royal Rumble (as do the Mysterios in another backstage promo). Ford strikes away at Azeez to start and gets shouldered out of the air for his efforts. A jumping enziguri staggers Azeez though and it’s off to Dawkins to elbow Crews in the face. The Silencer gets two with Azeez breaking up the cover, only to get low bridged to the floor. Azeez pulls Dawkins outside but gets posted, leaving Crews to enziguri Dawkins. Ford makes a blind tag though and it’s the Anointment into the frog splash to finish Crews at 2:19.

We’re halfway through the show and have had about nine minutes of wrestling so far.

Damian Priest is ready to retain the US Title and won’t lose his cool.

Doudrop isn’t happy with being left out of the #1 contenders match because everyone is sick of the same women getting chance after chance. Sonya Deville makes a triple threat with Doudrop, Liv Morgan and Bianca Belair with the winner getting the shot at Becky Lynch at the Royal Rumble.

US Title: Damian Priest vs. Dolph Ziggler

Priest is defending and loses the title if he gets disqualified or counted out. Ziggler gets launched into the corner for some right hands to the face but Priest pulls back before the DQ. They head outside, where Ziggler hits a tornado DDT on the floor and we take a break. Back with Ziggler taking Priest down with a running knee for two. I’m not sure why that’s described as “offensive creativity” but I don’t want to know how WWE announcers think/are told to think.

Priest kicks him down and goes up top, where Ziggler catches him but can’t hit a superplex. Instead Priest scores with another kick to the face, only to have Robert Roode trip Priest down. The Fameasser gives Ziggler two so Priest goes after Roode, but can’t bring himself to use the chair. Back in and Priest teases going after Ziggler with the chair but he hits Roode instead. The Zig Zag gets two so Ziggler tries a superkick, only to get countered into the Reckoning to retain Priest’s title at 9:23.

Rating: C. That’s the match of the night by about a mile and that does not say much. They did have me thinking the title might change hands, but thankfully they kept their senses and didn’t do a completely insane change. Priest needs to get back to being the cool rockstar type, but I think they’re locked in with this RAGE deal.

Austin Theory comes up to Vince McMahon and accidentally interrupts his phone call. Vince doesn’t like Theory apologizing but Theory is here about his rematch with Finn Balor. That doesn’t work for Vince, who puts Theory in the Royal Rumble. Theory is amazed, as am I by the amount of camera cuts needed for a minute and a half of two people standing together talking.

Here are Miz/Maryse for a chat (after a commercial/video on Miz vs. Edge, with Beth Phoenix returning to chase off Maryse). Miz talks about how Edge needed Phoenix to bail him out at Day One because he was a scared little boy. We see last week’s Brood Bath but Miz says true love like theirs will always win. After the wedding vows, Miz vowed to end Edge once and for all.

Miz asks what kind of man would need his wife to protect him, but what kind of man would do that? Maryse talks about how awesome Miz is and says she would punch Phoenix in the face if she was here. Cue Edge and Phoenix for the couples pose so Miz and Maryse back off. Edge: “Figures.” Edge talks about how scared he knows they are and throws out the challenge for the mixed tag.

Miz talks about Maryse’s moisturizer line so Phoenix asks what it’s going to be. Miz accepts so Maryse freaks out and falls down a the threat of Phoenix’s right hand. Maryse storms off and Miz chases after her, trying to talk his way out of this. Beth’s rather odd hair style aside, this was a rather fast way to get to the obvious next step.

Big E. isn’t happy with the loss but it’s time to start getting the title back.

AJ Styles vs. Omos

AJ goes right after him to start before bailing outside when Omos pushes him around. Back in and Omos kicks him in the face to send AJ right back to the floor. A posting rocks Styles again but he comes back in with the Phenomenal Blitz. The Phenomenal Forearm is caught but AJ snaps his throat across the top rope. Another Phenomenal Forearm attempt is swatted out of the air and a gorilla press drop makes it worse. The double chokeslam finishes Styles at 3:47.

Rating: D+. That wasn’t exactly good but it was far from some tragedy unfolding before our eyes. Omos mostly stood still and knocked AJ around, which is exactly what he should be doing. There is no reason for him to do anything more than use his size and power to crush AJ and that’s what he did here. It wasn’t an exciting match or technically sound, but it’s how they should have done things.

Alexa Bliss is…going to be on her way back to Raw next week. As in we will see her on the way back.

Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins vs. Big E. vs. Bobby Lashley

One fall to a finish and the winner gets Brock Lesnar for the title at the Rumble. It’s a brawl to start with Lashley sending Rollins into the post and Owens being taken down. Big E. and Lashley are left in the ring to slug it out with Lashley getting the better of things. A suplex drops Big E. so Lashley goes outside, only to miss a spear through the barricade. Big E. is back up with a suplex to Rollins but Owens makes the save.

There’s a posting for Big E. and Owens buries Lashley underneath the barricade. A Shield style powerbomb puts Big E. through the announcers’ table and we take a break. Back with Owens and Rollins in control but Lashley and Big E. get up, with the chase going into the crowd. They wind up in the concourse where Lashley Hurt Locks Rollins. Owens breaks it up with a trashcan lid so he gets put through a t-shirt table as we take another break.

Back again with the fight still in the crowd but Owens dives off a balcony to take everyone down. They get back inside, where Lashley saves Big E. and starts firing off suplexes. Lashley runs through Rollins, leaving Owens to get speared, sending Lashley to the Rumble at 18:04.

Rating: B. I don’t have many complaints here. The match got time, they had a fun brawl (we’ll ignore that it might not be a good idea to be in the stands during a pandemic) that actually felt different and even protected Big E. while giving us the right winner. It’s the best thing all night by a mile, which isn’t saying much, but it did work.

Brock Lesnar is in the back and says tell Roman Reigns he’ll see him on Smackdown.

Overall Rating: D. I don’t know what they were going for here but this show really didn’t work. Above all else, it felt like they were trying to stretch the show out because they didn’t have anything to put out there, but then it took over an hour and a half for a match to break three minutes. This show was all over the place and while the main event was good, it wasn’t enough to overcome the string of short matches that didn’t really advance anything and weren’t good in the first place. I didn’t get this show and hopefully they can get back to something closer to normal next week.

Results
Alpha Academy b. RKBro – World’s Strongest Slam to Riddle
Reggie/Dana Brooke b. Tamina/Akira Tozawa – Flipping seated senton to Tozawa
Queen Zelina/Carmella b. Rhea Ripley/Nikki Ash – Rollup to Ash
Street Profits b. Apollo Crews/Commander Azeez – Frog splash to Crews
Damian Priest b. Dolph Ziggler – Reckoning
Omos b. AJ Styles – Chokeslam
Bobby Lashley b. Big E., Kevin Owens and Seth Rollins – Spear to Owens

 

 

 

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