Monday Night Raw
Date: October 9, 2006
Location: Columbia Coliseum, Columbia, South Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s a special three hour show this week with Raw Family Reunion. A bunch of people who have not appeared in a long time will be back and that could make for some interesting moments. We are also in for the start of some new stories as John Cena finally vanquished Edge for good last week inside a cage. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

New opening sequence, featuring To Be Loved by Papa Roach. I always liked that one.

All of the commentators welcome us to the show, which does give it the pay per view feeling.

Here’s John Cena to get things going. He’s hyped up to be here on this special edition of the show, which is also the 698^th episode. Before he gets going though, he has a message for Edge, after the chairs, the cages, the violence and the carnage, the champ is still here. Cue King Booker and Queen Sharmell from Smackdown with Booker bragging about how he retained the title in a four way last night at No Mercy. He also brings up his last appearance on Raw, when he made Cena kiss his feet.

Cena does a better British accent and talks about coming to Smackdown where he beat Booker’s team in a six man. The fight is almost on but here’s Big Show to say he’s the Champion Of Champions. Show: “You’ve got a white guy who talks like he’s black.” Show: “What you talking about Willis?” Show says Booker is a black guy who talks like Prince Charles so Cena calls him the Michelin Man. Cena doesn’t think much of Show calling himself the most dominant giant ever. Cena: “There’s another giant. Andre, The. Look it up.”

Show says he’s heard that before and if Andre was here, Show would beat him up too (that sounds so wrong). Booker asks what the point is and then they argue over whose movie was best, with Show bringing up the Waterboy. Booker talks about being in Ready to Rumble and….the other two crack up laughing (I mean…..ok yeah it was that bad). Cena thinks they should figure out who the best is and hammers on Show, who clears the ring in a hurry.

Teddy Long, Paul Heyman and Jonathan Coachman (the bosses) argue in the back over what we just saw. Three matches are made for later: Show vs. Jeff Hardy, Booker vs. Rob Van Dam and Cena vs. Undertaker. Well that just escalated.

Umaga vs. Kane

Armando Alejandro Estrada (carrying a long wooden stick) is here with Umaga and the loser leaves Raw. Kane slugs away to start but Umaga hammers him into the corner. Umaga misses a charge into the corner though and eats an elbow, only to knock Kane outside in a hurry. We take a break and come back with the running hip attack being cut off with a grab of the throat.

The chokeslam is broken up though as Umaga knocks him down and hits a top rope splash. The Samoan Spike is blocked as well and now the chokeslam connects. There’s the top rope clothesline but Estrada hits Kane with the board, setting up the Samoan Spike to give Umaga the pin.

Rating: D+. I wouldn’t expect any long matches tonight and that is not the worst thing in the world. This was all about wrapping up their rivalry (at least for now) and it worked out well enough. Beating Kane is almost a required merit badge for a monster so at least they got it out of the way again here. Kane really needs a change of scenery anyway.

Post match Kane gets the big sendoff round of applause.

South Carolina football coach Steve Spurrier is here and gets an introduction from Lilian Garcia.

Kane goes to leave but the Highlanders stop him to say it was an honor to be here with him. The beating doesn’t take long and Kane walks out.

DX has to give a formal apology for everything they did last week when they ran the show, which apparently they weren’t allowed to do. HHH doesn’t let Shawn finish any of them though because none of them were their fault. Shawn apologizes for beating Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch in a street fight, but that isn’t until later this evening. They realize they’re live so it’s time for a quick merchandise plug. These things are horribly corny but they make me chuckle.

Big Show vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title. Hardy hammers away to start as Tazz actually mentions that Show is from South Carolina in the kind of trivia that most commentators wouldn’t think to include. Show shrugs everything off and slams Hardy down, only to miss the Vader Bomb elbow. The Twist of Fate is countered but Jeff manages to snap Show’s throat across the top rope.

The Whisper in the Wind sets up the Swanton for two, only to have Show grab the cobra clutch backbreaker (dubbed the Big Sleep). Now it’s the chokeslam for the pin. Too short to rate, but Joey citing the Hardcore Title as proof that Hardy was extreme was funny. They really didn’t have anyone from Raw other than the new Intercontinental Champion though? Like, Carlito wasn’t available?

Post match Johnny Nitro runs in to beat on Hardy but gets laid out by Show as well.

The Marine trailer.

D-Generation X vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Street fight, but first, HHH has to say Vince isn’t here because he can’t find one big enough in South Carolina. HHH mentions Cocky, the University of South Carolina mascot, who appears on the screen. He isn’t here though, because apparently he has representation. Fans: “GAME! COCKS!” HHH: “No no. I’m the Game, he’s the cock.” HHH makes every joke about the name you can imagine and Shawn looks ready to bite through his lip.

Anyway, the match starts fast with HHH being sent outside, where he sends Cade face first into the announcers’ table. A double whip sends HHH into the steps and an atomic drop into a running big boot to the face drops Shawn. The whipping is on, which makes things a lot more difficult as Shawn and Cade look a good bit alike here. HHH comes back with the chair and Cade is busted open off a shot to the head. The table is set up at ringside and Shawn elbows Murdoch through it in a hurry. Back in and the superkick into the Pedigree finishes Cade.

Rating: C+. This was short and the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt but it was intense while it lasted. DX needed to break a bit of a sweat and while Cade and Murdoch aren’t the biggest opponents, so this was a nice little surprise. At least they got violent in a street fight, which isn’t the case often enough in these things.

In the back, Edge blames DX for costing him the World Title last week. Tonight, it’s the Cutting Edge.

We look back at Kane losing.

Here’s Shelton Benjamin to say this is almost his hometown so he isn’t leaving without some competition from any brand.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit takes him into the corner to start but Benjamin manages a quick shot to escape. A drop onto the ropes sets up the chinlock but Benoit fights up with the running forearm to the head. The German suplex connects on Benjamin, though the Swan Dive only connects with the mat. Not that it matters as Benoit grabs the Crossface for the fast win.

Paul Heyman tries to give ECW credit for Benoit but Teddy Long isn’t having it. Coach brings in Super Crazy and asks which brand is the best. All three try to get Crazy to say their brand is the best but the only thing Crazy can do is say all three brands are great. Long: “YOU SPEAK ENGLISH???” Crazy: “Si.” The bosses are all stunned.

Chavo Guerrero/William Regal/Finlay vs. Batista/Bobby Lashley/Rey Mysterio

Chavo starts with Rey and is quickly hurricanranaed out to the floor. Finlay and Regal have to bail to the floor to avoid a double 619 and the big brawl is on as we take a fast break. Back with Cole telling us not to adjust our sets because this is indeed Raw. Has anyone in the world ever thought they were on the wrong channel (or night in this case) and actually adjusted their set? Maybe turning the sharpness up and the contrast down makes it ECW?

Anyway, we’re back with Finlay hitting a shoulderbreaker on Rey so Chavo can hammer away in the corner. A big kick to the head allows Rey to bring tag Batista….but the referee doesn’t see it. The sitout bulldog plants Chavo and allows the real tag to Batista for the house cleaning. The Jackhammer gets two on Chavo as everything breaks down. Rey hits the top rope hurricanrana into the 619 into the spinebuster into the frog splash for the pin (as Lashley just gets to look on for some reason).

Rating: C. Nothing but a showcase match here and that’s all it needed to be. There is something nice about taking six of the best a show has and throwing them out there for a pretty easy night’s work and that’s all they did here. They had some star power and it keeps Chavo vs. Rey going (assuming they want to) and the fans had some fun. Not too bad.

Eric Bischoff has a book.

Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young get to come out to the stage for a quick wave. Nothing wrong with that.

John Cena trained with Marines at Paris Island, South Carolina.

Booker doesn’t think much of Cena and promises to dominate RVD tonight.

Women’s Title Tournament First Round: Melina vs. Torrie Wilson

Melina walks up the steps and Lawler is livid about the lack of splits entrance. Actually we’ll make this a lumberjack match, with the Extreme Strip Poker participants at ringside. They both get sent outside to start and then get sent back inside because yes, this is a lumberjack match. Back in and they slug it out until Torrie gets two off a suplex. A Kristal distraction lets Melina grab a rollup with trunks to win.

Post match Torrie gives Kristal a Stink Face.

Clips of the Wrestlemania press conference. Edge is WWE Champion here so this is a bit out of date.

King Booker vs. Rob Van Dam

Non-title. Booker misses a kick to the face to start and gets rolled up for two as JBL and Tazz bicker about announcing prowess. Van Dam gets sent shoulder first into the post and Booker hits the hook kick to the face as the arguing continues. Cole: “I’M BEGGING ANYBODY TO LET ME CALL A NEAR FALL!” Van Dam fights up and elbows Booker in the face but Sharmell crotches him on top, allowing Booker to hit a spinning kick for the pin.

Rating: C-. Another short match but they did what they were supposed to do. Just let them get in and out while keeping Van Dam protected. It’s not like the champions are likely to lose here and they didn’t waste time trying to make us believe otherwise. These two can have a better match if they are given the chance, but that wasn’t the point here.

Cryme Tyme debuts next week.

The Spirit Squad’s Mitch admits that he sucks but he’ll beat Ric Flair tonight because Flair has no friends.

Vince McMahon returns to interrupt the bosses and has an idea: a triple threat Champion vs. Champion vs. Champion match at Cyber Sunday with the fans voting on who gets to defend their title. Yeah they like the plan.

Clip of the Marine premiere at Camp Pendleton.

Mitch vs. Ric Flair

The Spirit Squad is here so Ric brings out Roddy Piper, Arn Anderson, Ted DiBiase and IRS. That’s a collection of great legends and IRS! If nothing else the Horsemen theme is great to hear every time. The Squad runs off in fear and Flair shrugs off the forearms to the back, setting up the Figure Four for the win in less than a minute.

Here are Edge and Lita for the Cutting Edge. They don’t waste time and bring out Randy Orton in the guest. Edge talks about how Orton impressed him two years ago when he won the World Title but since then, he has done absolutely nothing. Orton doesn’t like that and it’s even worse when Edge talks about all of Orton’s big losses. We see a clip of HHH throwing Orton out of Evolution and beating him down and Edge says it was all HHH ruining his career. Now history is repeating itself and HHH cost him the title last week. Someone has to stand up to DX and it should be the two of them. Hands are shaken and we have an alliance.

John Cena vs. Undertaker

Non-title again. They circle each other to start until Cena hammers away in the corner, only to get tossed into the corner so Undertaker can show him how it’s done. Old School is countered though and it’s a superplex to give Cena two. Undertaker grabs the bearhug but Cena is out in a hurry for the flying shoulder. A running DDT gives Cena two and the sit up freaks him out. The FU is countered and Undertaker hits the chokeslam but here are Big Show and Booker to jump Undertaker.

Rating: C. Another match that didn’t matter much but the atmosphere was certainly there. You don’t see two actual titans of WWE going at it very often and while Cena was still climbing, he was the top star in the company here and putting him in the ring with Undertaker feels important. There was no one anyone was taking a pin here so for once, the run in was the perfect call.

Post match Mr. Kennedy comes in after Undertaker as well and the two of them go up the ramp. The champs are left alone and Cena drops Booker, setting up the STFU on Show. An FU plants Booker to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. As you can probably guess, this wasn’t about the wrestling itself and for once it wasn’t even about the legends. This was about making people care about all three brands on one night and putting a new coat of paint on Raw (or at least giving it a new theme song). That worked out well and it felt like an important show without anything that dragged the show down. It’s not a masterpiece but it felt energized and I had fun, which is the point of a big special like this. Nice show and they did well when they were trying to.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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ECW on Sci Fi
Date: October 3, 2006
Location: Landon Arena, Topeka, Kansas
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Things have gotten a bit more interesting around here in recent weeks after Hardcore Holly ripped his back apart in a match with Rob Van Dam last week. That is the kind of moment that made this place actually feel extreme and if they can do something like that (without horribly injuring someone) they might be onto something. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Paul Heyman and Hardcore Holly look at the injury last week with Heyman saying Holly can’t wrestle Rob Van Dam tonight, no matter how much he wants to. Heyman is worried about a lawsuit but Holly grabs him by the coat (Heyman: “BOB!”) and shoves him into a locker. Cue Test with a chair to the back to put Holly down in agony. Test will get to face Rob Van Dam tonight instead.

Opening sequence.

Sandman/Sabu vs. Matt Striker/Big Show

That is one of the oddest tag matches I have ever seen. Sabu and Show start things off with the right hands not having any effect on the giant. A headbutt drops Sabu and it’s off to Striker to slowly stomp away. The springboard leg lariat puts Striker down but Show low bridges Sabu out to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Show suplexing Sabu so Striker can get two. Striker sends Sabu face first into Show’s raised boot and then takes him down by the hair. Sabu gets in a shot of his own though and the hot tag brings in Sandman (to a heck of a pop). Everything breaks down and Show breaks up the White Russian legsweep. A splash from Show lets Striker steal the pin.

Rating: D+. As weird as that was, including the loud pop for Sandman’s hot tag, this wasn’t much of a match. I’m not sure what you would have expected from something like this though, as you have Show and almost no one else, which doesn’t make for the strongest setup. I do like them trying something fresh though as they have to bring in someone new at some point.

We look at Holly being attacked again. Turning Holly face off of that injury would be….I’m not sure how that would work actually.

Kelly Kelly and Trinity promote next week’s Extreme Strip Poker with Kelly opening her top to reveal a pair of strategically placed aces.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Kevin Thorn

Ariel is here with Thorn, who shoves Dreamer off the middle rope to start and hammers away. A missed charge in the corner lets Dreamer grab a neckbreaker for two and there’s a swinging neckbreaker for the same. The Dreamer DDT gets two as Ariel puts the foot on the rope. The referee yells at her, allowing Thorn to get in the walking stick shot for the pin.

Rating: D+. Another lame match here, mainly due to the time. Thorn still feels like a token supernatural character and that isn’t the most appealing idea. Dreamer is still fine enough for a midcard spot around here and it would be weird to not have him as part of ECW. Not very good here, but what else were they supposed to do?

The Marine still exists.

Maria and Candice Michelle want to play poker.

CM Punk vs. Danny Doring

Butterfly backbreaker into the kick to the head and Anaconda Vice for the tap in just over a minute.

Post match Kelly Kelly comes out and dances for Punk but Mike Knox cuts her off. Knox tells him to stay away from Kelly, but Punk says she won’t stay away from him. The brawl is teased but doesn’t happen.

Ashley and Kristal have more poker trash talk, because that’s a thing.

Rob Van Dam vs. Test

Extreme Rules. Van Dam kicks away to start but gets sent outside in a heap. The choking on the barricade doesn’t work but neither does Rob’s spinning kick to the back. That’s enough for a banged up knee so Test grabs the steps, which bounce off the post and fall back onto his face instead. Despite the bad knee, Van Dam hits Rolling Thunder onto Test onto the steps.

The table is set up at ringside but Test blasts him with a clothesline back inside. A chair is kicked into Rob’s face and Test puts another one in the corner. Rob is able to grab a chair and throw it at Test’s face, setting up a heck of a sunset powerbomb to send Test through the table (in a nice call back to Holly’s injury). We take a break and come back with Paul Heyman coming out to the ring. Test kicks Van Dam low and then sends him outside, where the security guards beat up Van Dam even more.

Back in and Van Dam is sent head first into the chair in the corner for two. The bearhug goes on so Rob escapes in a hurry, only to get chaired in the face again. The turnbuckle pad was taken off somewhere in there but Van Dam kicks him down for a save. Rob skateboards the chair into Test’s face in the corner but Rolling Thunder only hits chair.

Test goes up top with a chair and drives it onto the chair onto Van Dam’s face (that looked good) for two. Another table is set up inside, where Van Dam counters a powerbomb into a sunset flip for two of his own. Test goes into the exposed buckle and is then sat on the table, but Van Dam has to go after the security guards. Cue Show to send Van Dam through the table and Test’s TKO is good for the pin.

Rating: B-. That has to be Test’s best match ever and while it was hidden behind a bunch of smoke and mirrors, it worked out rather well in the end. Test gets the big win and Van Dam’s punishment continues, but they need to give him something sooner or later. Heck of a main event though and I had a lot of fun with the whole thing.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event helped a lot but next week’s show does not sound like their best offering. It’s good that they are setting up stories for later, but there are still a bunch of things that are not exactly interesting. The strip poker deal might be the biggest ratings ploy ever and feels like it belongs on Raw in 1999, though it should do its job well enough. I liked enough stuff on here and given where some of the previous shows had been, this worked fine.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: September 26, 2006
Location: Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

Things are starting to round into form around here, but the question is whether or not that is a good thing. There are some parts of the show that work well enough, but there are so many that don’t and it is showing badly. As usual, this is likely going to depend on the guest star so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Jim Ross as the special guest. JR is glad to be here and talks about how he got his start in this very building. He says ECW reminds him of Mid-South and here’s Matt Striker to interrupt. Striker is out here on Paul Heyman’s behalf because he knows JR is uneducated. JR is wearing a blue shirt because he is blue collar and probably enjoys drinking ALCOHOL! Just like Sandman! Striker criticizes the cowboy hat (fair) so here’s Sandman to clean house, with JR getting a cane shot to Striker’s back. JR toasts Sandman, who is getting a title shot against Big Show tonight.

Hardcore Holly is ready to show Rob Van Dam what extreme is.

Hardcore Holly vs. Rob Van Dam

Extreme Rules. Van Dam throws him hard into the corner for a running elbow and a superkick puts Holly on the floor. That lets Rob hit the spinning kick to the back over the barricade and it’s table time. As usual, that takes too long and Holly jumps him from behind and stomps away in the corner. We hit the reverse chinlock, with some EXTREME closeups of Van Dam’s face.

Van Dam makes it to the ropes so Holly runs him over again. Holly goes out to the apron to suplex him through the table and we take a break. Back with Holly’s back sliced to shreds with a HORRIBLE looking gash near his side. The fans even chant for him as he drops Van Dam’s throat across an open chair. A middle rope legdrop onto a chair onto Van Dam’s face has Holly writhing in pain as there is so much blood on Holly’s back. Van Dam is back with a suplex onto the chair, making the blood flow even harder.

There’s a monkey flip out of the corner as Holly is probably ready to kill Van Dam for every one of these moves. The chair is skateboarded into Holly’s face but he counters another monkey flip into a powerbomb onto the chair for two. Van Dam kicks him down again and tries the Five Star, only to get the chair thrown into his face. The Alabama Slam is broken up so Holly punches him in the face but staggers a bit. Back up and the Van Daminator sets up the Five Star for a delayed pin, allowing Holly to head off for a transfusion.

Rating: B. Holly deserves all the credit in the world for this one as no one would have held it against him for stopping the match. That was one of the more gruesome injuries I have seen in a very long time and it was hard to watch this more than once. Heck of an effort, but it probably should have been stopped for his own good.

Medics are IMMEDIATELY in the ring to cover the wound and Holly gets a big and well deserved standing ovation.

CM Punk explains straightedge and wants tougher competition. Kelly Kelly comes in and mentions EXTREME Strip Poker in two weeks. She swoons over his tattoos and mentions being 19 but here’s Mike Knox to take her away. Threats are made and Punk says he’s ready whenever.

John Cena has a wife in the Marine.

Ariel vs. Francine

Extreme Catfight. Before the match, Ariel talks about how horrible Francine’s life is and how much she’ll wish to be with Kevin Thorn. The fight is on with Ariel losing some clothes until Thorn comes in to pull Francine off. Balls Mahoney come sin for the save and we’re done in about a minute.

Video on Sandman.

Paul Heyman and Big Show talk about the Singapore cane being legal in the main event.

Rene Dupree gets out of the show in an extreme manner.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Sandman

Sandman is challenging and the Singapore cane is legal. Joined in progress with Sandman caning away as we hear about Holly needing 24 stitches to sew up the gash (which went down to the fatty tissue). Show, bleeding, gets up from the cane shots and knocks Sandman around. A headbutt and heavy clothesline take Sandman down but he throws the left hands. Sandman counters the chokeslam into a DDT and more cane shots give Sandman two. Cue Matt Striker to take the cane away though and the cobra clutch backbreaker has Sandman mostly done. The big leg retains the title.

Rating: D. This was much more of a match than I would have expected but you’re only going to get so much out of Sandman throwing punches and cane shots. Sandman was working harder than usual here and while he was trying, there is a pretty firm limit to what he can do. For a one off though, it was a nice way to give Show someone else to beat up.

Overall Rating: C. That opener carried everything about the show and there wasn’t much else they could have done on the show. Above all else, Holly vs. Van Dam felt extreme rather than just violent. We’re long past the point of this show being like ECW, but it is nice to pay some lip service to that occasionally, even if it is just by mistake in one match. Not a very good show, but that wound on Holly has stayed in my head since I saw this show when it first aired for a reason.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

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https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/breaking-big-show-paul-wight-signs-aew/

I didn’t see this one coming.This isn’t going to be some kind of a game changer and no Wight isn’t going to be the big focal point of the company.  He’s a name and can be funny on commentary, which is all he needs to be.  This is about a headline and AEW did really well with it.

Unforgiven 2006
Date: September 17, 2006
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 16,105
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

I can’t believe it but I’m actually looking forward to this show as it has a stacked card. We have a double main event of John Cena challenging Edge for the WWE Title in a TLC match, plus DX vs. the McMahons/Big Show inside the Cell. Throw in Trish Stratus’ retirement match and you have a heck of a show. Let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on the double main event while talking about how the thirst for revenge can be unquenchable. Makes perfect sense.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Johnny Nitro

Nitro is defending and has Melina in his corner. Feeling out process to start and we pause for a NITRO SUCKS chant. Neither can get a hiptoss so Hardy armdrags him into an armbar for a change. That works so well that Hardy does it again but this time Nitro is up with a forearm into the corner. Cue Melina screaming, which is likely to be a theme throughout the match. Jeff takes him down for the legdrop between the legs to send Nitro outside, followed by right hands in the corner back inside.

There’s the slingshot dropkick but it’s way too early to try the Swanton. Instead Hardy baseball slides him to the floor but Nitro catches him with a dropkick on the way back inside. Nitro starts working on the knee by driving it into the mat and hitting a hard kick (cue the scream). Some cranking on the knee ensues with a modified Indian Deathlock, followed by a chop block. As commentary tries to figure out where Pat Patterson is at the moment, Morrison misses a corkscrew moonsault, allowing Hardy to grab a rollup for two.

JR has to cut Lawler off from talking about Melina’s moist looking skin as Hardy knocks Nitro off the top. The Swanton bangs up the knee though and it’s a pretty delayed two. Nitro starts cranking on the leg again but Melina gets on the apron for no apparent reason. That means a big crash as Hardy kicks Nitro into her, meaning a rollup gets a near fall. Melina pops up with her boot off and knocks Hardy silly so Nitro can retain.

Rating: B-. This got some extended time and it was a good choice for an opener. They did their thing until the ending, which was a bit off but served as a fine way to keep the title on Nitro. There is nothing wrong with sending two young(ish) guys out there and having them put on a good match to start things off and that is exactly what they did here.

Teddy Long is here in case John Cena loses and has to go to Smackdown.

Matt Hardy comes up to Jeff Hardy in the back and tells him good job. Lita comes in for the Team Xtreme reunion but mocks both of them for not being champions.

Umaga vs. Kane

Armando Alejandro Estrada is here with Umaga and hypes up Umaga before the match. Kane slugs away to start and they’re on the floor in a hurry with Umaga getting the better of things. Back in and the running headbutt keeps Kane in trouble, followed by the running Umaga Attack in the corner to make it worse.

Kane comes back with his own right hands but charges into the Samoan drop to cut that off. It’s time for the middle rope thumb to the throat but Kane sits up to avoid it, giving us a great shocked look from Estrada. Some headbutts rock Umaga and Kane suplexes him out to the floor. There’s a clothesline over the barricade and they brawl into the crowd for the double countout to continue the feud.

Rating: C-. There’s nothing wrong with a power brawl and Umaga kept looking good, though the ending didn’t exactly make me want to see them keep fighting. Umaga dominated most of the match and while what we got was acceptable enough, there was only so much that you could get out of a seven minute match which ended in a bridge to the next match.

Post match they fight onto the stage and then…..into the back, drawing a rather negative reaction from the fans.

Vince and Shane McMahon fire each other up and insult Canada.

Tag Team Titles: Spirit Squad vs. Highlanders

Kenny and Mikey are defending for the Squad. Rory sunset flips Mikey for an early two and it’s already time to slow down a bit. Mikey’s head is sent into Robbie’s in the corner and the Highlanders start taking turns on his arm. Kenny comes in and gets backdropped in a hurry so the Highlanders can take over on him as well. Some slingshot knees connect in the corner and Rory does exactly the same for two.

That’s enough for Kenny to bring Mikey back in so Rory ax handles him in the chest. A dropkick puts Mikey on the floor but Robbie’s dive completely misses. Back in and a running clothesline takes Robbie down as the champs take over. Kenny grabs the chinlock before handing it off to Mikey for the front facelock.

Something like Poetry In Motion misses but Kenny is smart enough to knock Rory off the apron to break up the hot tag. That means another chinlock but the guillotine legdrop only hits mat. The hot tag brings in Rory to clean house and Kenny is tossed over the top onto some more of the Squad. Everything breaks down and Johnny gets in the Johnny Go Round from behind to retain the titles.

Rating: C-. This could have been on almost any given edition of Raw and that’s all it was supposed to be. It’s not like the Highlanders, or any team at the moment, means much at the moment so it makes sense to have such an average match. Raw’s tag division has never been the strongest, but Smackdown is absolutely smashing it by comparison at the moment.

We get the long recap of D-Generation X vs. the McMahons/Big Show inside the Cell. Vince McMahon wouldn’t shut up about Montreal so he got in a war with Shawn, who eventually got HHH to join him against Vince and his cronies. Shane McMahon got involved as well so DX beat the two of them without much effort, meaning it was time to up the stakes. Vince hired Big Show and a few other goons, so it’s time to put them in the Cell.

D-Generation X vs. Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon/Big Show

Inside the Cell. DX gets smart by kicking Show low before the bell and the fight is on in a hurry. Shawn sends Shane out to the floor and there’s another double low blow to keep Show down. Shane gets catapulted face first into the Cell so Shawn unloads on him as HHH hammers Vince in the face. We have our first blood as Shane’s bloody forehead is sent into the Cell again.

Vince is loaded up for the top rope elbow but Show is up to take care of DX in a hurry. HHH manages to send Show into the steps and drops a knee on Vince’s head but Shane is back to clothesline Shawn outside. Vince is busted as well as Show chokeslams HHH and then sends Shawn face first into the Cell on the floor. Shawn gets lawn darted into the Cell to make it worse, leaving HHH to get hit with Shane’s Coast To Coast.

HHH’s earn injury from Raw is busted open again, leaving Show as the only one not bleeding. HHH gets catapulted into the Cell so Show hits the cobra clutch backbreaker on Shawn. Vince covers but picks him up ta two, allowing HHH to come back in and clean house. Shane is back up with a torture rack neckbreaker (where did he learn that) to HHH. It’s Shawn back up with an enziguri to knock Shane to the floor….but Vince is taking his pants down.

That’s broken up by HHH but Show takes over again. Show’s splash hits Vince by mistake though and there’s a low blow to cut the big man down again. Some chairs are brought in with HHH wrapping one around Shane’s neck for a top rope elbow from Shawn. Show makes another save and brings in the steps but HHH gets in a chair shot. That sends Show into the steps and a superkick puts him over the top rope. As in draped over the top rope, so DX pulls his shorts down. Vince goes face first into it, setting up Sweet Chin Music and a sledgehammer broken over the back finally finishes Vince off.

Rating: B+. I was surprised at the lack of any interference, leaving this as two people having to fight off three and looking like they came through a war in the process. This felt like what they billed it up as and that’s a great thing to see. I had a good time with the match and it should finish up the DX vs. McMahons war because there is nothing left for the two sides to do to each other. Heck of a fight here and even the Vince face shot made sense in the context.

The McMahons are taken out on stretchers.

We recap Trish Stratus vs. Lita for Lita’s Women’s Title, but it is also Trish’s retirement match. Therefore, we get a nice video package on her career (at least once she became a wrestler), during which she really did become one of the most important female wrestlers ever. Lita found out about the retirement though and leaked the news to WWE.com, sending Trish over the edge. Now it’s one last fight against her biggest rival. For the title. In her hometown.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Trish is challenging and gets a heck of a hometown pop. We get a THANK YOU TRISH chant to start and there’s the spinning headscissors to put Lita on the floor. The Thesz press of the apron hits Lita and there’s an anklescissors off the steps. Back in and Lita starts choking a bit and hits the chinlock to keep Trish down. That works for all of five seconds so Lita uses the evil by pulling her down by the hair.

Trish comes back with a few kicks to the ribs but charges into an elbow in the corner. Lita goes up so Trish follows her for a slugout, only to have both of them fall out to the floor in a crash. Back in and Lita misses the moonsault to give Trish two but Stratusfaction is countered with a shove over the top and outside again. Back in and Lita snaps off a suplex for two, setting up some more kneedrops.

A few right hands have Lita staggered though and dang the fans are into every single thing Trish does here. Lita kicks her down again though and we hit another chinlock but this time Trish fights up for the slugout. This time the Stratusphere pulls Lita off the top and the Chick Kick gets two. The Stratusfaction is blocked…so Trish switches into a Sharpshooter for the submission and the title.

Rating: C. The wrestling was absolutely not the point here and that’s fine. This was all about letting Trish have one more moment on her way out (because, again, the “time honored tradition” is nonsense) and that’s what she had here. Trish was a huge star in WWE and it was great to see her get a well deserved sendoff. Lita isn’t going to be hurt by the loss and the fans REALLY liked what they got here. Not a good match or anything, but a great moment.

Randy Orton says that was nice but no one cares about Trish’s retirement. Now watch what made him the youngest World Champion ever, right here in this building.

Carlito vs. Randy Orton

They fight over a lockup to start and Carlito spits in his face, setting up some left hands to the floor. Back in and they strike it out with Carlito knocking him down and hitting a Lionsault for two. Orton manages to snap him throat first across the top though and a dropkick puts Carlito on the floor.

They come back in with Orton hitting the always devastating Garvin Stomp, setting up the always present chinlock. Carlito fights up and hits a quick springboard elbow but walks into the backbreaker. Orton tries a suplex but Carlito flips out and grabs the Backstabber. For some reason Carlito loads up a springboard but dives right into the RKO for the pin.

Rating: C-. Another Raw level match here and there was little reason for Carlito to try that springboard other than to set up the ending. Carlito’s face turn has had lukewarm results at best so far, even after pairing him with Trish. Orton has been kind of floating around for a bit as well and I’m not sure what he is supposed to do next. This felt like a filler match and that’s not a good sign.

We recap John Cena vs. Edge in a TLC match. Cena has been chasing Edge’s Raw World Title but only has one last chance. Therefore it’s Cena’s Raw career vs. Edge’s title in Edge’s match’s hometown. Sounds like a pay per view main event worthy of a music video to me, which is why the main event gets the music video treatment here.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena

Tables, Ladders And Chairs, with Edge defending. Edge gets a rather nice reception but Cena is booed out of the building, which is about all you could expect. Cena grabs a headlock to start and is loudly booed again. Some shoulders put Edge down for the same reaction so he slaps Cena in the face. They start slugging it out and head to the floor with Edge’s chair shot hitting the post.

Back in and Edge hits a DDT to cut off Cena’s offense to put him onto the ropes. A few ladder shots to the head have Cena in more trouble but he avoids a charging ladder shot in the corner. Edge gets thrown into the ladder in the corner and it’s time for a table. You don’t try to suplex Edge through a table though as he powerbombs Cena through it instead. With Cena down on the floor, Edge runs up the ladder in the corner to hit a dive to take him out.

Back in and Edge can’t hit the Conchairto, instead sending Edge’s head into a chair. Then Edge gets crushed inside the ladder, setting up the STFU inside the ladder (that’s a versatile ladder). Cena then mixes things up a bit by FU’ing the ladder onto Edge and climbing up (that’s a REALLY versatile ladder) for the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Another table is loaded up but Edge caves his head in with a chair and puts Cena on the table. Then he puts a table on top of Cena on top of that table.

That takes some time though and Cena shoves Edge off the top for the next crash. Back in and Cena climbs the ladder, only to have Edge climb another ladder and spear him down. Edge climbs this time, but Cena powerbombs him into the side of a standing ladder for a nasty crash. They’re back on the floor, where a hard chair shot to the head puts Edge down again. Back in again and Cena climbs the ladder, only to have Lita come in and shove it down and through a well placed table at ringside.

Edge goes up but Cena comes back in, earning himself a chair shot from Lita….which knocks Cena into the ladder to knock Edge down again. That earns Lita an FU, allowing Cena to climb again with Edge down on the floor. Edge runs back up to go after the title but Cena FU’s him through the double tables. With Edge mostly destroyed, Cena pulls down the swinging title for the win.

Rating: A-. This felt like the big blowoff to a pretty special feud as Cena beats Edge at his own game on the perfect stage. It was a violent and hard hitting match, which is all you could ask for in something like this. Cena overcame the odds and won the title back in grand fashion, with the big spot at the end being the memorable moment to make it feel all the more special.

Overall Rating: B. It’s a two match show but those two matches were awesome and that’s enough to rate this one pretty high. The opener works rather well too and there is nothing bad on the whole card. Some of the stuff was pretty clearly filler, but when almost a third of the show is made up from the two awesome main events, it makes for one of the better single brand pay per views in recent memory.

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ECW on Sci Fi
Date: September 12, 2006
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 17,298
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Oh yeah I’d say this is a special one. I know that this isn’t the original ECW and it is pretty much the same in name only, but it has to be an especially cool moment for these guys to make it to the World’s Most Famous Arena. We’re still setting up Hardcore Holly as Paul Heyman’s newest enforcer against the combined powers of Rob Van Dam and Sabu. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Paul Heyman, now billed as the Father Of Extreme Championship Wrestling, and with his bodyguards, to open the show. He talks about how everyone is here to witness something special because this is the center of the universe. Heyman talks about how important this building is to a kid who grew up in New York and he thanks….himself for making this happen.

Who else is he supposed to thank? Five years ago, he listened to the people and ECW went out of business. Now he is listening to Vince McMahon on how to grow ECW and it has gone from the Bingo Hall to the Garden. Cue Sabu to take out the bodyguards and get in a few shots on Heyman until the guards get up to pull him off. The guards get Heyman out so Heyman makes Sabu vs. Big Show in an Extreme Rules match for the title. Sabu dives onto the guards. You could hear how special this was to Heyman and that’s pretty cool.

Rob Van Dam vs. Hardcore Holly

It’s a brawl to start with Holly backdropping him to the floor and hitting a dive of his own. Rob kicks away but misses the spinning kick from the apron for the big crash. Back in and Holly chokes away on the ropes but a middle rope elbow….well it wasn’t supposed to connect as Van Dam raised his boot but it did connect with Van Dam’s face anyway so it was kind of a weird landing. Rob kicks him down and hits the monkey flip out of the corner, only to get crotched on top. The top rope superplex is broken up though and Van Dam loads up the Five Star but here are Test, Stevie Richards and Mike Knox for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Holly may not be much of a threat to Van Dam but he’s fine as a hard hitting villain who could make him break a sweat. That’s all he needs to be, but ECW could use an imposing or at least threatening heel wrestler outside of Big Show. Test and Knox aren’t exactly people who are going to be top level villains and that can only go so far.

Post match the big beatdown is on until Sandman and Tommy Dreamer make the save. Richards takes the beating. The Old vs. New feud may not be the most original idea but what else are they supposed to do with these guys?

Video on the Marine.

CM Punk vs. Shannon Moore

Fallout from Punk calling him a poser last week. Moore slaps him in the face to start but Punk grabs the Vice in the corner. Some knees set up the strikes to the face into the Rock Bottom. The Anaconda Vice makes Moore tap in a hurry. Thank goodness, as I don’t think I could handle Moore as someone supposed to be taken seriously.

Post break, Kelly Kelly comes up to rub CM Punk’s chest and say what a big fan she is. She would love to go to one of those wild and crazy nightclubs with Punk but she’s only 19. Mike Knox comes in to get rid of her.

Rene Dupree vs. Balls Mahoney

Kevin Thorn and Ariel are at ringside. Dupree gets sent into the corner for the snap jabs to start but Dupree hits him in the face. A middle rope elbow gets two and the French Tickler makes its return (with Tazz not wanting to sing). Back up and they slug it out with Mahoney’s sitout spinebuster getting two. A Cactus Clothesline puts both of them on the floor so it’s chair time, with the referee taking it away from Mahoney. Ariel offers a distraction and Thorn sends Mahoney off the apron and head first into the steps to give Dupree the pin.

Rating: D+. Much like Moore, am I supposed to take Dupree seriously? It wouldn’t seem to be the case, but it also doesn’t make ECW look all that important. These guys weren’t being featured on WWE TV for a reasons and they feel like people who are there because WWE has nowhere else to put them. The repackaging can only do so much, but at least they’re trying. Kind of.

Matt Striker doesn’t like the fans drinking giggle water and watching Sandman. That isn’t good, so the choice is yours: cheer Sandman or come to class and learn.

We look back at HHH vs. Vince McMahon from last night, including Big Show coming in to help the McMahons beat down DX.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Show, with Paul Heyman and security, is defending and it’s Extreme Rules. Sabu whips out a table and chair and after a break, Show swats the chair out of the air. Show knocks him down and sends Sabu to the floor for the beatdown from security. Back in and some headbutts put Sabu down and a running clothesline does it again. Sabu gets smart by kicking him low and now the thrown chair works a bit better.

Show is crotched on the ropes and a jumping kick to the face puts him on the floor. The fans want tables but have to settle for Show running Sabu over again. The chokeslam through the table is countered into a DDT through the table for two instead and some more chair shots put Show through a table at ringside. Show gets posted and Sabu sets up another table but Sabu’s dive is countered into a chokeslam through said table. Back in and the cobra clutch backbreaker retains the title.

Rating: C-. The matches are fine enough for what they are but how many times can we see these two do the same thing? Sabu isn’t going to win the title and we established that a pretty long time ago. Show needs a new challenger, but other than Rob Van Dam, who is there to do that right now? I get why they needed to do a title match in MSG but they need something different to do going forward. I’m just not sure what that is.

Overall Rating: D+. While the Garden is the big point here, and it’s really cool that ECW got to do something there, it’s also not a good show or a good sign for their future. ECW really, really needs to upgrade their roster and I’m not sure how important it is for WWE to send more talent over here. The old vs. new stuff is fine enough and Show works as a champion, but he needs challengers and a lot of the card is pretty weak. I’m not expecting WWE to make that better though and that’s why ECW keeps feeling like it’s in big trouble long term.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 11, 2006
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 17,298
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Oh yeah I think they might make this one feel special. It’s the go home show for Unforgiven and that means we need the final push forward, including a pretty big main event. This week it’s Vince McMahon vs. HHH, which should be rather special for Vince given what the Garden means to him. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a moment of silence for the 5^th anniversary of 9/11. The Marine Corps Color Guard presents the flag and Lilian Garcia sings America the Beautiful, which is great as always.

Ric Flair vs. Umaga

Flair (in red, meaning it isn’t likely to be a good night for him) slugs away to start so Armando Alejandro Estrada gets up for a distraction. That just lets Flair hit some low blows but Umaga is up again. Flair has had it and grabs a chair for some shots to the head and the DQ.

Umaga isn’t having these chair shots to the head either so Flair grabs the steps, which are swatted away as well. A Samoan drop plants Flair on the floor so here’s Kane for the brawl. Umaga chairs Kane down but he sits up and gets sent outside. Kane picks up the steps and throws them over the top, hitting Umaga square in the face (I remember watching that live and losing it at how scary that looked). The fire sends Umaga staggering away.

Vince and Shane McMahon are outside the Garden and we see Vince’s marker on the Madison Square Garden Walk Of Fame (roped off of course).

We see a clip of Cactus Jack vs. HHH in (and out of) the Cell at No Way Out 2000. I know it’s well remembered but it’s a shame more people don’t talk about that match as much as they do thanks to the other Foley Cell match.

Here’s the New York City Pipe And Drum Corps to introduce the Highlanders……and Roddy Piper to blow the roof off the place. Piper is pleased to have been ranked as the #1 offender in WWE history in a new magazine. He introduces the Highlanders and asks which one Rory is. Rory: “This is my cousin Robbie.” Robbie: “I’m Robbie.” Roddy: “I’m Roddy!” Robbie: “I’m Robbie!” Roddy: “I’m Roddy!” Then they slap each other, which Piper says is the most fun he’s had since he beat up Mr. T.

Cue the Spirit Squad to say that everyone here is dressed like girls. Piper says that’s tough talk coming from a bunch of guys who had their testicles replaced with pom poms. The challenge for the six man tag is thrown out and you know that Piper is down for that. Granted he issued the challenge so maybe that was implied.

Roddy Piper/Highlanders vs. Spirit Squad

Joined in progress with Roddy holding Johnny’s arm so Robbie can come in off the top with an ax handle. The two Squad members on the floor offer a distraction so the ones in the match can get in a few cheap shots. Robbie fights out of Kenny’s chinlock but gets taken into the corner again anyway.

Mikey’s running knee gets two and we hit the neck crank. Kenny breaks up another comeback bid and it’s back to Johnny for a hard clothesline. The chinlock doesn’t last long again and the hot tag brings in Piper to clean house. Kenny slugs away at Piper, who quickly backdrops him out onto the floor. The Highlanders grab the double reverse slingshot suplex and Piper steals the pin.

Rating: D+. Of course the match itself wasn’t the point here and we got everything we needed here. This show is being treated like a homecoming special and Piper is one of the most famous wrestlers ever in Madison Square Garden. Go with what works to pop the crowd here and give the Highlanders a bit of a rub at the same time. Piper looked like he was having a ball out there too and that’s great to see.

Johnny Nitro and Melina don’t like Jeff Hardy saying their press conference was like watching paint dry. Melina doesn’t think much of Mick Foley talking about things that happened twelve years ago but hang on because Hardy is painting. Said painting is trashed so he throws the paint on the two of them.

Another classic Cell moment: Shawn vs. Undertaker.

Here are Edge and Lita for a chat before Edge is in a six man tag. Tonight is going to be John Cena’s last match on Raw before he gets sent back to Smackdown where he got started. In honor of his move, it’s time for a special rap, with Edge talking about winning at Unforgiven and mocks the Yankees and New York women.

Edge/Randy Orton/Johnny Nitro vs. John Cena/Carlito/Jeff Hardy

Nitro, still covered in paint, hammers at Jeff in the corner to start but Hardy knocks him right back down. The dropkick to the ribs allows Hardy to bring Carlito in to flip Nitro over and nip up. Orton comes in and gets clotheslined down, followed by an elbow to the face for two. It’s off to Cena and that means the big showdown with Orton despite it not really being a big showdown moment yet.

Cena’s release fisherman’s suplex gets two but Cena goes after Edge, allowing Orton to hit his own suplex. The painted Nitro comes in and gets taken down for some right hands to the face, allowing the tag back to Carlito. It’s back to Orton, who gets clotheslined down and taken into the corner so Hardy can stomp away. A running clothesline puts Orton on the floor and Hardy nails a dive to take him down again.

Edge gets in a cheap shot to Hardy though and that means some hardcore six way staring to take us to a break. Back with Edge working on Hardy’s leg before handing it off to Nitro for the same. Edge comes back in and gets caught with the Whisper in the Wind, allowing the hot tag off to Carlito.

The pace picks up but Edge pulls the middle rope down to send him crashing to the floor. Back in and Nitro’s neckbreaker gets a delayed two so it’s another chinlock. That’s broken up as well and it’s the really hot tag to bring in Cena. Carlito cuts off an RKO attempt with a Backstabber and Hardy adds a Swanton to Orton. The FU into the STFU finishes Nitro as Edge and Lita walk out.

Rating: C+. This got a lot of time but there were quite a few chinlocks to stretch said time out. What we got did work well enough though and I was liking what we were seeing for the most part. Nitro losing to Cena isn’t the worst thing in the world, though I’m still not wild on seeing a champion take a fall. Good match here, but not quite as epic as they seemed to be trying to reach.

Another Cell moment: HHH pins Chris Jericho on top of the Cell.

Cryme Tyme knocks a white guy down and steals his wallet. Egads this isn’t aging well, even if it’s so over the top that it’s hard to take seriously.

Vince McMahon says he’ll win here, unlike Muhammad Ali.

Super Crazy vs. Chris Masters

Rematch from last week when Crazy got an upset win. Masters jumps him from behind to start and the beatdown is on with Crazy getting caught in a chinlock. Back up and Crazy scores with a middle rope crossbody before slipping out of an over the shoulder backbreaker. A hurricanrana takes Masters down again and a sunset flip gives Crazy the fast pin. As usual, the best way to make someone matter in wrestling is to give them some wins so well done so far.

Robert Patrick is in the Marine.

Smackdown Rebound.

Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James

This is Trish’s final match on Raw. Mickie grabs the wristlock to start but Trish flips out and throws in a smile. The Thesz press into some right hands have Mickie in trouble but she counters the Stratusphere into a hurricanrana out of the corner. A double clothesline puts them both down but Trish is fine enough to catch Mickie in the Stratusphere on the second attempt. The Chick Kick misses and here’s Lita for a distraction. That’s fine with Trish, who hits the Stratusfaction off of Lita to finish Mickie.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t much to see and that’s completely missing the point. Trish might have been surpassed over the years (almost everyone is at some point) but she absolutely was a huge deal and a game changer for women’s wrestling. If nothing else, how many of today’s crop of women cite her as a huge influence? Trish deserves a big sendoff and that’s what they were going for here, at least on Raw.

Post match Mickie and Trish hug and Trish thanks the fans.

Classic Cell Moment: Kevin Nash vs. HHH, in a match that has kind of been buried in history. I can’t say I really disagree either.

This Week In Wrestling History: the post 9/11 show.

Unforgiven rundown.

D-Generation X runs into Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch and the brawl is on in a hurry. Shane McMahon runs in to help with the beatdown before the main event. Big Show joins in and chokeslams Shawn Michaels onto the limo. Speaking of the limo, HHH has the door slammed on him, allowing Vince McMahon to come in and make the main event no holds barred.

HHH vs. Vince McMahon

No Holds Barred and Vince’s muscle shirt is red instead of the usual black. HHH can barely walk and is bleeding from the…..ear? Somewhere head related at least. Vince is smart enough to headbutt him in said ear, knocking HHH down in a hurry. Choking ensues and some shots to the face with Vince’s belt put HHH on the floor. Vince posts him hard and adds in a kick to the face, so HHH tells him to suck it.

A Pedigree gives Vince two and it’s Game On. HHH hammers away and hits the spinebuster but here’s Shane for a cheap shot to save his pop. Cue Shawn, holding his ribs, for the save but Big Show takes care of that comeback as well. HHH grabs the sledgehammer, only to be taken down by the numbers. Shane chairs Shawn and Vince hits HHH with the sledgehammer for the pin.

Rating: D+. As has been the case tonight, the wrestling didn’t matter here because this was barely a match. What matters here is DX FINALLY having to deal with some adversity as they have mowed through everyone else in recent months with no one else even making them break a sweat. I’m not sure I can imagine them losing inside the Cell, but this set up the possibility and that’s what mattered.

Overall Rating: C+. This show worked because they made it feel like an important night. The Garden is sacred ground for WWE and they know how to make it feel like a place that matters. That’s what they did here and it worked rather well, with a mixture of a build to the pay per view and special moments throughout the night. I had a good time with this and as I said more than twice, this wasn’t about the wrestling and that’s ok in a special situation.

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: September 5, 2006
Location: Civic Center, Columbus, Georgia
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s time for more guest stars as a ticked off DX is here to face Big Show in a handicap match. For once this is actually part of a story as DX will be facing Show and the McMahons in the Cell at Unforgiven. Hopefully this serves as a good setup for the match, but you never can tell what you are going to get around here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of DX surviving against the McMahons and company at Summerslam.

DX arrives and confirms that this is the right place (HHH: “Bingo.”). Good thing their travel arrangements were properly made.

Opening sequence.

Sabu/Rob Van Dam vs. Test/Mike Knox

Extreme Rules and Kelly Kelly is here with the monsters. Since it’s Extreme Rules, we start with Sabu vs. Knox because WWE doesn’t understand their own rules. Sabu gets in a shot to Knox and quickly brings in Van Dam, which is probably the best idea in the “extreme” portion. The first table is loaded up at ringside and Sabu grabs a chair for a bonus. Rob manages a spinwheel kick in the corner and Rolling Thunder gets two on Test. Sabu comes in for his half of a double springboard leg lariat for two on Knox.

Everything breaks down (at least they didn’t waste time) and Van Dam has to kick Test in the face to save Sabu from a gorilla press. Everyone but Sabu fight on the apron in front of the table so Sabu uses the chair as a launchpad to drive through all through said table. We take a break and come back with Test breaking up the Triple Jump Moonsault but getting chaired into the corner.

Van Dam skateboards the chair into Test’s face but Knox chairs him down to break up the Five Star. There’s a superplex to Van Dam, only to have Sabu hit Knox with a chair for two. Another chair shot gets one with Test making the save but Air Sabu hits him in the corner. The Triple Jump Moonsault connects for a rather delayed two and it’s time for a fresh table. Rob starts throwing the chairs and it’s the guillotine legdrop/Five Star to drive Knox through the table for the pin.

Rating: C+. The dumb tagging part aside, this actually felt like something involving ECW, which is one of the only times that has been the case so far. If nothing else, it would be a lot to take to see Sabu and Van Dam lose to these two goons. At least they seem to be starting to move in a slightly better direction, but it might already be too late.

Kevin Thorn and Ariel do their tarot card thing and decide it means something sexual.

It’s time for Striker’s Classroom with Striker telling everyone that they’re stupid. These people need to stop learning about Michael Vick and read more books by Rush Limbaugh. He’s too smart to be stupid though and as a result, he won’t swim in the ocean with stingrays (it was earlier in the week). Cue Sandman through the crowd (Striker: “You’re a little bit inebriated! Come on!”) to chase Striker off and write SUX under Striker’s name on the chalkboard. Striker says that just proved his point before leaving.

Video on the Marine.

Stevie Richards vs. Balls Mahoney

Before the match, Kevin Thorn and Ariel come to the commentary booth, where Ariel climbs onto Joey for a lap dance. Richards takes Mahoney down inside as Joey is sounding a little more nervous than usual. Mahoney fights out of a chinlock in a hurry but is right back down in it a few seconds later. This time the comeback actually works with Mahoney getting a rollup for two. Thorn and Ariel get on the apron for a distraction though and Richards hits a low blow for the fast pin.

Shannon Moore says he’s bringing sexy back. CM Punk comes up to call him a poser and slaps him in the face. Punk leaves and Moore starts crying.

Big Show vs. D-Generation X

Non-title and Paul Heyman and his security are here. Before the match, Heyman says he has made a mistake and this will NOT be under Extreme Rules. There are no tags here so HHH slugs away and helps Shawn get in a DDT. Show isn’t having any of this double suplex stuff though and sends DX into various corners.

The Vader Bomb misses but it’s time for the security guards to go after HHH. That leaves Shawn alone with Show in the ring, where a gorilla press cuts off the LET’S GO DX chant. We hit the bearhug on Shawn so he gets smart by going to the eye in a hurry. HHH comes back in for the facebuster and the spinebuster but Hardcore Holly comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was as glorified of a cameo as you could have had from DX but you have three main event stars in a match so it’s not like they were going to be too bad. Holly coming in for the DQ at the end was a lame way to go but it made the most sense given the circumstances. It was as good as it was going to be here and everyone carried their part well enough.

Post match the brawl is on with the security guards helping put Shawn down. HHH comes in with the sledgehammer (including swinging it down onto one of the heads of one of the helmeted guards) and the villains run to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was one of the better ECWs so far and a lot of that is because it wasn’t the villains running roughshod over everyone. At some point you have to have the good guys give you some hope spots and that is what they did here. The show still isn’t great, but after everything they have been doing so far, the last few weeks have been a nice breath of air. Who knew Hardcore Holly might have been the secret all along?

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 4, 2006
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are less than two weeks away from Unforgiven and that means it is time to build up the card. The main event was set last week as John Cena will be challenging Edge for the World Title in a TLC match, which does sound like it has some potential. Other than that and a handicap match inside the Cell, you can probably see a lot of the card but there is work left to do. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the TLC match being set up last week.

Here is Edge in the ring with a table, a ladder and a chair (there’s something to that) to get things going. Edge sits on the ladder and says the “Get John Cena Out Of My Life Countdown” is on. After Unforgiven, Cena is going to the CW because Cena Can’t Win. The match is in Edge’s hometown and Edge has never lost.

We see a special video on Edge’s history in TLC matches (Video: “He’s fearless, he’s relentless, he’s Canadian.”) with some rather violent clips. Back in the arena, Edge says he’s getting rid of Cena and proving that he is the greatest WWE Champion of all time….and here’s Cena to turn the ladder over to put Edge through the table.

Jeff Hardy is painting a wall, which he says is like watching Johnny Nitro and Melina’s press conference from last week. Maria comes up and says it looks like Jeff is watching paint dry. Hardy: “Exactly.”

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Johnny Nitro

Nitro is defending and has Melina in his corner. They trade early rollup attempts for two each to start and it’s an early standoff. That means a kick to the chest to put Nitro on the floor and we take a break. Back with Hardy caught in a reverse chinlock and hitting a belly to back suplex to stay on the back a bit more. With the double arm crank not working, Nitro stomps away and cuts off a comeback with a hot shot.

The fans are behind Hardy but a backbreaker into a Russian legsweep cuts them off again. Nitro grabs a waistlock (with JR making a surprising error by calling it a bearhug) but Hardy comes back with an electric chair to put them both down. Hardy makes the clothesline comeback and uses his double legdrop rollup for two. The Whisper in the Wind gets the same and the Twist of Fate connects, drawing Melina in for the DQ.

Rating: C. They went with a different path here and it involved Nitro being a bit smarter than usual. It made sense to ground Hardy and proved to be right as Hardy’s comeback involved going to the air a bit to take over. This is probably leading to a rematch at Unforgiven and that should work out just fine for everyone involved.

Post match, Hardy hits a Swanton to Nitro’s back.

This Week In Wrestling History: Monday Nitro debuts.

Trish Stratus runs into Lita in the back, who isn’t impressed by Trish’s impending farewell. They set up a title match at Unforgiven and Lita slaps her, with the brawl being on. Carlito tries to break it up but gets jumped by Randy Orton.

Video on the Marine.

Lita pounds on Vince McMahon’s door but gets Shane (looking weird in a beige-ish suit) instead. Shane makes Lita/Orton vs. Trish/Carlito for later tonight. Lita would rather be with Edge, so Shane adds in Edge and John Cena to make it a six person. Jonathan Coachman sucks up to Shane, who rolls his eyes and leaves.

Here’s Chris Masters to say his comeback last week was interrupted so it’s open challenge time.

Chris Masters vs. Super Crazy

This is Crazy’s debut as part of the Raw roster and uh…..yay? Masters punches him down in the corner to start and sends Crazy’s shoulder into the post. That’s good for two back inside but Crazy is back with a spinwheel kick to the face. Crazy kicks him to the floor and hits a dive, followed by a sunset flip for two back inside. Masters blasts him with a clothesline but gets his leg dropkicked out, allowing Crazy to hit the moonsault for the surprise pin.

Rating: C-. What a random debut as Crazy was hardly a big star anywhere in WWE so far. That being said, there is nothing wrong with throwing out a high flier because he is the kind of guy who can go out there and pop the crowd. I’m kind of surprised that he beat Masters, but does Masters mean anything in the first place?

As Masters is upset, we randomly look at Maria still watching the paint dry (and possibly sniffing the roller).

We look back at Vince McMahon attacking DX last week and announcing the McMahons/Big Show vs. DX in the Cell at Unforgiven.

Here are the McMahons for a chat and Vince is looking rather happy this week. Before they can say anything, here’s Big Show to join them, with Vince nearly dancing to his music. Shane says last week was just a little preview for what is coming at Unforgiven, where DX will learn to never mess with the McMahons. Big Show talks about DX coming to ECW to face him tomorrow night, where it will be time to pay the price.

Vince says there is something missing this week and realizes what it is: the fans aren’t happy! They aren’t laughing like they were when they saw DX ruining so many of Vince’s things. Last week they destroyed DX and then it is going to be even worse at Unforgiven. So what kind of a chance will DX have against the three of them in the Cell?

Well that would be no chance in….and here’s DX, looking serious this week. HHH, with the sledgehammer (complimented by Shawn and his chair), says thank you for waking them up last week. They go to the ring and wreck security as the McMahons and DX leave. I can go for serious DX as they go into a major match for a change.

Highlanders vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Viscera/Charlie Haas

The winners get a shot at the Spirit Squad (on the stage) at Unforgiven. Cade and Murdoch clean house at the bell with Haas having to save Rory early on. Murdoch elbows Haas in the face but gets flattened by Viscera. Everything breaks down with Viscera flattening various people and Haas loading up a German suplex on Murdoch. Robbie comes in with a sunset flip to Haas, which send Murdoch flying as Robbie gets the pin and the title shot.

Rating: D+. It was energetic but there wasn’t much to see here. There also wasn’t much drama, as the Highlanders had been built up as the next challengers for a long time now, leaving this as more of a foregone conclusion. That isn’t the worst thing though and they were smart to keep this moving as quickly as they did.

Smackdown Rebound.

Carlito rants to Trish about Randy Orton, who he calls a fraud. Tonight, he’s spitting in Orton’s face.

And now, Maria with the Kiss Cam but here’s Ric Flair to interrupt. Maria certainly seems to approve of Flair, who says the only thing that would make this better would be a kiss. Flair gets what he asks for and Maria could not seem happier. It even makes Flair drop his microphone but here’s Armando Alejandro Estrada to interrupt. Estrada talks about Flair saying “to be the man, you gotta be the man”, but who has beaten Umaga? He wants Flair to pass the torch but that isn’t going to be the case. Cue Umaga but here’s Kane right after him. The brawl is on and Umaga is knocked to the floor in a hurry.

We get the first vignette of Cryme Tyme’s training, who rob a smoothie shop. They do make sure to get in a shout out to their friends though, which makes this somehow even more racist than it did before. These things would get half the company fired today.

Teddy Long is in a sky box.

Maria is back with her paint.

Unforgiven rundown, with Carlito vs. Randy Orton and Johnny Nitro defending the Intercontinental Title against Jeff Hardy confirmed.

Big Show knows he can destroy DX but Vince McMahon, holding his DVD, has a better idea: next week, he’s main eventing the show against HHH. It’s in Madison Square Garden you see.

Trish Stratus/John Cena/Carlito vs. Randy Orton/Lita/Edge

Edge has some very taped up ribs after the opening segment. Orton hammers Cena down to start but Cena runs him over with a running shoulder. It’s off to Carlito for the slugout until Orton pokes him in the eye like a villain should. Edge comes in so Carlito hands it off to Cena, sending Edge running off. The women come in to slug it out as well, with Lita blasting her with a clothesline.

Trish is right back up with a slap to Orton and everything breaks down as we take a break. Back with Lita chinlocking Trish, who comes back with a neckbreaker for a breather. The double tag brings in Carlito and Orton again, with Carlito nailing the springboard back elbow to the face. A quick distraction lets Orton send Carlito outside though and the stomping is on to put the villains in control again.

Edge hits a dropkick and the running spear in the corner but hands it off to Orton to kick away instead of covering. That never seems like a good idea but maybe it’s a Canadian thing. Lita gets in a bit of choking of her own and Edge nails a hard clothesline for two. Orton grabs the abdominal stretch but gets caught grabbing the rope. Come on man your dad taught you better than that.

Edge’s chinlock doesn’t do much on Carlito so Orton shows him how it’s done. This time Carlito fights up and hits an enziguri so Edge pulls Cena to the floor. Trish gets the tag instead and everything breaks down in a hurry. The Stratusphere takes Lita down but it’s an RKO to drop Trish and give Lita the pin.

Rating: C+. I can always go with the idea of taking a bunch of feuds and putting them into one match and that is what they did rather well here. The action was good enough and they had a pretty nice heel moment at the end with Orton laying out Trish to make Carlito even angrier. Solid main event here, as they went smart by doing everything at once.

Overall Rating: B-. As usual, a wrestling show is at its best when it has something to focus on and that was the case again here. With less than two weeks to go, the Unforgiven card is starting to look a heck of a lot better. I’m curious to see how things are going to go, but at the same time, what they already have is looking pretty good. Hopefully they don’t take a step back next week, because what we have here is making me want to see the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: August 29, 2006
Location: Sovereign Center, Reading, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Believe it or not, this week’s show is about Paul Heyman, who is the big evil around here and therefore has to deal with Sabu. I’m not the biggest Sabu fan, but if they want this show to have anything to do with the original ECW, Sabu is one of their best options. Granted I have no reason to believe WWE is going to have him do anything but challenge for the title so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Big Show beating Sabu again last week but getting put through a table after the match.

Paul Heyman talks about how this is his ECW and now, for the first time ever, he is wrestling in an ECW ring. Like Dr. Frankenstein, he has to destroy his old creation by pinning Sabu 1-2-3.

Opening sequence.

Rob Van Dam vs. Hardcore Holly

Van Dam starts fast with a monkey flip to send Holly to the floor so Rob gets the chance to finger point. A slugout goes to Van Dam and he hits the spinning kick to the back with Holly over the barricade. Back in and some right hands in the corner have Holly staggered but he manages to toss Van Dam to the floor for the big crash. The chinlock goes on back inside but Rob fights up because it’s a chinlock, meaning we get the clothesline comeback. The standing moonsault into Rolling Thunder gets two but the Five Star misses. Holly goes to get a chair but Rob takes it away and draws the DQ.

Rating: C-. Holly does fit the smash mouth style of ECW, but he’s also not the kind of name who would have ever been allowed in the original ECW, which is where things start to go downhill. He’s been known as a low level guy for so long that suddenly presenting him as someone who might matter doesn’t work. Just having him beat up Van Dam for a few minutes doesn’t make him a star, and neither does being around for thirteen years and being best known as part of a mostly comedy division.

Post match Rob chairs him away again.

Rene Dupree likes to be in shape because he’s extreme.

Here’s Big Show to talk about how awesome and dominant he is, both here, at Summerslam, on Raw and at Unforgiven. He’s so confident that he challenges DX to face him in a handicap match next week.

Shannon Moore says fight the power.

CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards

Joey says Richards should be Punk’s toughest challenge in ECW to date. So is it not official ECW history that Justin Credible was a lame ECW Champion? Richards misses a charge to start and winds up on the floor, allowing Punk to take him down with a suicide dive. Back in and Richards strikes away with some knees to the ribs, followed by a kneeling bearhug of all things. Punk comes back with a leg lariat into a butterfly backbreaker for two. The Anaconda Vice finishes Richards in a hurry.

Rating: D+. The fans weren’t impressed with Punk here but it makes sense to give him win after win. It has worked as a way to establish new wrestlers for the better part of ever and it will work with him. You can see the star power in him as he looks and carries himself like a far bigger deal than almost anyone else around here. That’s one of the best things someone can do and Punk does it as well as almost anyone in ECW.

Video on Sabu.

Here’s Matt Striker for Striker’s Classroom. Striker thinks people should cheer for him but instead they cheer for the Sandman, who is ossified from his giggle water. See, Striker is an intellectual giant drowning in a cesspool of derelicts. Here’s Sandman for the brawl, with Striker hitting him in the head with a stapler. That’s enough to leave Sandman bloody so Striker can run off.

Kelly Kelly interrupts Balls Mahoney and lets him see what is underneath her robe. Mahoney heartily approves.

Commentary talks about Kurt Angle being released. That’s still a weird way to send him off.

Speaking far too calmly, Sabu promises to massacre Paul Heyman.

Sabu vs. Paul Heyman

Extreme Rules and Heyman’s security is here with him. The guards jump Sabu to start but he manages to get a chair and clean house. Heyman knows he is in trouble but Sabu dives onto the invading Big Show instead, though Show pulls him out of the air. A DDT on the floor drops Show but he’s right back up to beat Sabu down, albeit with the guards’ help. Sabu is beaten down and Heyman screams at Sabu about how he made him. The beatdown continues, with Heyman getting a right hand in on Sabu’s bloody head.

That’s enough to send Heyman running around in celebration because he has blood on his hand. Heyman talks trash but Sabu gets a hand on him so Heyman screams for Show. Sabu is almost thrown through the table but here’s Rob Van Dam to make the save. A Van Daminator puts Show down in the corner and Rob dives onto the guards.

Sabu uses the breather to get in a few shots on Heyman but Show cuts off the springboard dive to put Heyman through the table. Cue Hardcore Holly to Alabama Slam Van Dam through the table, leaving Show to hit the cobra clutch backbreaker on Sabu. A legdrop from Show lets Heyman steal the pin.

Rating: C-. The match was a huge mess of course but I don’t think anyone was buying this as being anything else from the start. It’s smart to have Van Dam get back into the main event scene because he’s easily the biggest name ECW has outside of (maybe) Big Show. If nothing else, he is a bigger name than Sabu and that Show needs a fresh challenger after being Sabu multiple times.

Post match Sabu is chokeslammed through a table so evil posing can end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling wasn’t very good this week but overall, the show was a leap and a bound better than what it has been doing lately. Above all else, it felt like something was happening for a change and that they had some goals in mind. That’s a lot better than having Show beat up some guest star, which he’ll likely get to do next week. It might not be a good show, but it’s at least a show that makes a bit more sense and that’s a big upgrade after the last few weeks.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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