Smackdown – November 7, 2002: Look at Hour One. Look at Hour Two!

Smackdown
Date: November 7, 2002
Location: Verizon Wireless Arena, Manchester, New Hampshire
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re closing in on Survivor Series and that means Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show for reasons I don’t even want to comprehend. It’s not like we have a small army of amazing technical wrestlers who could have a great match with the former NCAA Champion wrestler running around. No the clear solution here is Big Show. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Big Show vs. Lesnar, which still isn’t anything interesting. Brock got beaten up, just as Paul Heyman seemed to think would be the case.

Opening sequence.

Later tonight: Edge/Rey Mysterio vs. Chris Benoit/Kurt Angle in a 2/3 falls match. I think we have a selling point.

Billy Kidman/Torrie Wilson vs. Jamie Noble/Nidia

The guys get things going with Noble taking over on the arm. A pumphandle suplex gets two but Nidia tags herself in, much to Noble’s chagrin. That means Torrie has to come in for a clothesline but she gets slammed for a near fall. Torrie takes her down out of the corner but stops to slap Noble, who responds with a clothesline. That certainly gets him booed but it doesn’t do much damage to Torrie, who gets the tag off to Kidman almost immediately. Everything breaks down with the heels being sent into each other, leaving Kidman to Bodog Noble. The Shooting Star is enough to give Kidman the pin.

Rating: C. I’m assuming this was done to set up Kidman going after the Cruiserweight Title, likely at Survivor Series, assuming anyone remembers that Noble actually has the title in the first place. That thing has been the least important championship in the company for a long time now with even the Raw Tag Team Titles having a higher value. Torrie and Nidia were just there, though it’s better than Kidman pinning Noble in a regular singles match.

Big Show is looking for Lesnar and wants a security guard to tell Lesnar that he’s here.

Torrie runs into her dad, who talks about how lonely he’s been. Tonight he’s going to do something for himself and he hopes she understands. Do these two never talk on the phone or outside of the arena?

John Cena raps about Rikishi and doesn’t seem to like him that much. Cue Rikishi for his half of the battle rap, which is rather inferior to Cena’s. “Piece of the Kish” is still a horrible catchphrase.

Stephanie watches the tape of Bischoff kissing her again because they’re STILL trying to make that into something. Eddie and Chavo Guerrero come in to make some jokes and ask for a title match. Stephanie gives Eddie Lesnar instead. She also promises an announcement regarding the Tag Team Titles on the upcoming Super Tuesday special.

Rikishi vs. John Cena

Cena can’t get a go behind to start and a headlock doesn’t get him very far either. Back in and John gets all fired up but runs away when Rikishi bends over in front of him. Instead Cena trips him up and gets two off a missile dropkick. A chinlock doesn’t get Cena very far as Rikishi gives him a Samoan Drop and Stinkface. The Banzai Drop ends Cena in a hurry.

Rating: D-. So Cena gets a new gimmick a week ago which allows him to show off his natural abilities and now he’s jobbing to Rikishi in a match where he’s humiliated. Even Test got to win some matches and his entire gimmick is his manager saying “Testicles” over and over again.

Rikishi dances post match.

Shannon Moore has embraced Mattitude but gets yelled at for putting sugar in his coffee. Moore is dubbed an MF’er (Mattitude Follower) and Matt goes off to see Brock.

Al is with Dawn Marie and promises to ask her the question.

Matt goes to see Lesnar but finds Heyman instead. He offers to soften Big Show up like he did with Undertaker and Heyman gives him a bunch of praise. Heyman goes in to see Brock to tell him what happened but Brock isn’t happy. Paul tells him to chill because it’s all about Survivor Series.

Here’s Al Wilson to call Dawn Marie to the ring for the question. She’s made him feel strong, sexy and virile. He proposes and she accepts as the announcers make jokes about Billy and Chuck. Cole: “Look at Dawn!” Tazz: “Look at Al!” Cole: “Look at Dawn!” Tazz: “Look at Al!” Al threatens to kill herself if she says no and Dawn finally says yes. Cole and Tazz: “NO!”

Big Show vs. Matt Hardy

Matt hates cold weather and scored a 1330 on his SAT’s. Dang I got a better score than Matt. Show clotheslines him down to start and tosses him to various places. A backbreaker sets up a bearhug but Matt bites his face to break it up. Not that it matters as the chokeslam ends Matt in less than two minutes. Ok so they just set up Matt with a lackey and they had NO OTHER OPTION here other than to squash Matt? Nothing at all? There was NO ONE associated with Matt that could have done this?

Show says he’ll win the title and we see Lesnar destroying a TV.

Tag Team Titles: Kurt Angle/Chris Benoit vs. Edge/Rey Mysterio

Angle and Benoit are defending and this is 2/3 falls. Mysterio sends Angle to the floor to start and grabs a hurricanrana back inside. It’s off to Edge as we hear about his great feud with Angle over the summer. Edge snaps off some armdrags but makes the mistake of going after Angle, earning himself a German suplex.

The champs beat on Edge for a bit until he catches Benoit in an implant DDT. The hot tag allows Rey to Drop the Dime for two and the pop up hurricanrana gets a VERY close two as well with Angle making the save. Not that it matters as a powerbomb/springboard seated senton ends Benoit for the first fall. A quick Angle Slam is countered with an armdrag so Kurt settles for a belly to belly. Benoit adds a gutbuster as Rey is in trouble, which is one of his strong suits.

Rey reverses a super gutbuster to put both guys down, setting up a double hot tag. Edge cleans house (of course) but dares to suplex Angle, who sidesteps a spear to send Edge into a belt shot from Benoit. The ankle lock ties things up and we take a break with Benoit and Angle arguing over credit for the win. I know this story is done to death but when it’s done well like this, it’s rather fun to watch.

Back with Angle in control on Mysterio until a spinwheel kick allows another hot tag to Edge. A belly to belly sends the Canadian flying though and Benoit comes back in. That means a variety of suplexes, including a belly to back superplex which knocks both guys silly. Angle and Mysterio come in again with Rey picking up the pace and sending Angle shoulder first into the post.

The 619 is countered but Rey grabs a sunset flip for the pin and the titles. Now you know it’s not going to end without several more near falls and, of course, Angle had the ropes so there’s no fall. Back from another break with Rey dropkicking the arguing champions, earning his knees a solid beating. Benoit grabs a gutwrench suplex and hands it back off to Angle for more suplexes.

Rey counters a wheelbarrow suplex into a DDT and it’s back to Edge for the house cleaning. An ankle lock cuts that off in a hurry but Edge sends him into the buckle, allowing Rey to hit a 619 around the post. Edge spears Angle and avoids Benoit’s Swan Dive, which hits Angle by mistake. A dropkick puts Chris on the floor and Edge pins Angle for the titles.

Rating: A. This was the rare ultra long TV match and there’s almost no way that these four aren’t going to have an instant classic with this much time. Every combination of these guys are going to be able to have an amazing sequence and that makes for some outstanding TV. I could have gone with this being a one fall match but the 2/3 falls was hardly a bad idea.

We run down the Super Tuesday card. I’ll throw that in as a bonus with the next Raw review.

Big Show has something in mind for Lesnar tonight.

Eddie and Chavo annoy Heyman until Brock comes out and chases them off. Heyman yells at Brock and tells him to stick with the plans that got them here. Paul won’t be there for him tonight to teach Lesnar a lesson for one night.

Scott Steiner video.

Brock Lesnar vs. Eddie Guerrero

Non-title. Chavo’s cheap shot doesn’t get him very far so Brock goes with shoulders to Eddie’s ribs. Brock: “Come on holmes! Come on essa!” Eddie gets run down again and we hit the bearhug. The champ switches it up to an over the shoulder backbreaker but bends both arms down at the same time.

Chavo offers a distraction so Eddie can get in a low blow and a hard series of stomps. The Lasso From El Paso goes on but only seems to annoy the champ. A dropkick only makes it worse and that means it’s time for the belly to belly. Chavo pulls Eddie out of the way of a charge though and Brock goes shoulder first into the post. Not that it matters as Brock gets back up for the F5 and the pin.

Rating: C+. That’s a great use of both Lesnar and someone like Guerrero. Eddie is going to be fine with a loss like this and Lesnar gets something out of a victory here. Losing to the World Champion doesn’t hurt Eddie whatsoever so let them do this in a quick TV match. It needed more time but it was good enough while it lasted.

Post match here’s Show to toss Lesnar off the stage and onto a crash pad to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. Talk about a difference between hours. The first half of this show was filled with young talent getting beaten up by older guys and Al Wilson. The second half was a thirty minute classic and a fine Lesnar vs. Guerrero match. I don’t remember the last time a show turned on the jets like that and it made for some very fun TV. Get rid of the Al stuff and these shows are even better than they are now, which is quite the impressive move.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the NXT: The Full Sail Years Volumes I and II, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Wrestlemania XXXIII Preview: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

All aboard!

This one belongs on the pre-show, for the sake of the entrances taking up too much time alone. At the moment there are a ton of jobbers filling out a lot of the spots, meaning this is about what you would expect from this kind of thing. At the moment there are twenty five entrants, though you can almost guarantee five more being added at minimum. As is so often the case, only a handful of them are realistic options.

For my money (and almost everyone else’s), those options are Big Show, Braun Strowman and Sami Zayn, but I’ll throw in Mojo Rawley and the recently added Killian Dain. There’s a real chance to make someone in this battle royal and they’ve been pushing the heck out of Rawley on TV as of late. Throw in how cool he was at Axxess and I’d love to see him go somewhere, especially in a match that doesn’t have to be some big game changer if they don’t want it to be. The rest of the filed will be pure filler, but it could be really interesting to see what surprises they might throw out.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the NXT: The Full Sail Years Volumes I and II, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Smackdown – October 31, 2002: I’m Sure This Show Won’t Change Wrestling Forever or ANything

Smackdown
Date: October 31, 2002
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s a special show as Smackdown is having a Halloween party. This show is memorable for one specific reason that we’ll get to later but above all else it isn’t likely to include necrophilia or a #1 contender losing to a low level talent. Did I mention I’m still a bit sick of Raw at the moment? Let’s get to it.

We open at the party with Ron Simmons as a pimp (yelling at the French maid waitresses), Eddie coming in as Zorro and Chavo in a sombrero. Stephanie (looking GREAT as a witch and showing off her, shall we say, cauldrons) calls things to order (we need good, organized fun around here) and puts Rey Mysterio in the main event against Brock Lesnar.

Opening sequence.

Edge vs. Chris Benoit

Feeling out process to start with Edge working on the arm but getting reversed into a headlock. They chop it out until Benoit gets sent chest first into the buckle for two. They’re certainly taking their time here and that should only mean good things. Edge drapes him ribs first across the top but misses a baseball slide, allowing Benoit to start in on the shoulder.

A dropkick sends the shoulder into the steps, which Cole thinks might be a prelude to the Crossface. Benoit sends the arm into the post and gets two off a suplex. They head to the corner with Benoit loading up a belly to belly superplex, only to get countered into what looked like a super X Factor to send us to a break.

Back with Edge having to go to the ropes to escape the Crossface but getting caught in the rolling German suplexes. Edge is ok enough to hot shot him onto the buckle and grab an Edge-o-Matic for two. The spear is countered into the Crossface so Edge grabs the referee for a unique idea. Cue Angle to pull Benoit off though, allowing Edge to baseball slide Benoit into Kurt. Edge dives at Benoit but hits Angle instead, followed by the spear for the pin on Benoit.

Rating: B+. Good stuff here with Angle’s interference making sense and allowing Edge to still get what was close enough to a clean win. Edge is clearly on the fast track to the top of the card and wins like this are going to put him even higher up on the card. I mean, assuming he learns to sell the arm that was worked on when he hits the winning spear that is. That still bugs me.

We go back to the party where John Cena, dressed like Vanilla Ice, debuts his rapping skills, which allegedly saved his job (and so it begins). Elsewhere, Tajiri runs into Torrie Wilson as Xena Warrior Princess (as opposed to Xena, your local Hyundai dealer) but tells her he has a new girlfriend. This causes him to hit on Mae Young (Marilyn Monroe) when Dawn Marie (a cop) and Al Wilson (Fonzie) come in. Nothing of note is said but they did in fact come in.

Post break, Benoit storms into the party and wants Angle. No one has seen him so Benoit leaves, only to have Angle pull off a Scream mask and smirk.

Brock Lesnar, not in costume (thank goodness), runs into a production worker who asks who Lesnar is supposed to be. Brock: “I’m the WWE Champion.” Good answer. Lesnar goes in to see Heyman, who compares the Cell match to Ali vs. Frazier. As you try to get your head around that, Heyman says he doesn’t think Lesnar can beat Big Show. So Lesnar isn’t as good as Booker T., Rob Van Dam, Bubba Ray Dudley or BILLY GUNN, all of whom have beaten Big Show this year. Heyman also implies that Lesnar is too stupid to know he can’t beat Big Show. When they push Show, they REALLY push Show.

Big Show vs. Rikishi

Show is in street clothes, which certainly look less ridiculous than that one piece women’s swimsuit look he had been sporting. Rikishi hammers away to start but gets taken outside where the beating begins. A whip into the corner breaks the turnbuckle pad and a powerslam has Big Show winded. The chokeslam is good for the quick win.

Post match, Show says that was nothing compared to what Lesnar is getting at Survivor Series. He’s waiting for Lesnar and even stays in the ring through a break. Back with Show letting us see the Undertaker attack last week in case we had forgotten how big and awesome he is.

After more bragging (including Show saying Brock can’t beat Paul Wight), Brock FINALLY comes out, despite Heyman’s protests. Lesnar gets right in his face with the announcers talking about how big the size difference is. You mean like the one with Undertaker? Show is a monster and promises to beat Lesnar. This was WAY too long and featured way too much Big Show, who might as well just be a big dragon at this point.

Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson

They’re fighting in a big pool of chocolate and there’s a table of pastries next to them. Cole describes Torrie, as Xena Warrior Princess, as a dominatrix Heidi. Anyway, pastries are used, the chocolate is invaded, the referee is dragged in, Dawn’s clothes are ripped off and she eventually gets out, allowing Torrie to get the pin. I have no idea what else there is to say here.

Tony Chimmel is thrown into the chocolate.

Matt Hardy shows up at the party and of course he has his own portable theme music. He takes Tajiri away from Moolah and Mae Young (“Versions B.C.”) because they have a match.

Nidia and Jamie Noble (dressed as each other) bob for apples when Los Guerreros come in to ask Stephanie for a Tag Team Title shot. Cena raps to her to say Vince is in Stephanie’s office.

Matt Hardy vs. Tajiri

Matt always got more Halloween candy than his brother and he’s seen all of the Friday the 13th movies. I guess he’s not a Michael Myers fan. The announcers immediately start talking about Vince, who MUST be here to talk about the Scott Steiner signing. They slowly fight over a top wristlock to start with Tajiri bridging out and armdragging Matt down. A baseball slide puts Matt on the floor for a moonsault.

Back in and the Side Effect gets two on Tajiri as everything on the floor is quickly forgotten. The Ricochet gets the same and it’s off to a cravate to keep Tajiri in trouble. Matt spends too much time screaming before trying the middle rope legdrop and Tajiri gets in one heck of a superkick for two. The Tarantula is countered into a wheelbarrow suplex though, followed by the Twist of Fate to give Matt the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine enough but really nothing all that special. Matt is doing as well as he can but with this as his biggest win under the new gimmick, there’s only so much he’s going to be able to do. I mean, he’s a week removed from losing clean to Rikishi. Tajiri is entertaining but just kind of there for the most part. Not much here, but that’s part of the problem with this section of Smackdown.

Stephanie goes into her office and it’s someone in a Vince mask. The person brags about Steiner going to Raw and of course it’s Bischoff…..who kisses Stephanie. She certainly doesn’t seem to mind it because THIS STORY IS THE BIGGEST THING EVER (except for Big Show) and you’ll care!

Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero

Angle takes him to the mat to start and Eddie dives for the ropes for an early break. Something like a backdrop throw sends Eddie flying and it’s time to go outside for a breather. There’s something very intimidating about Angle crouched down and waiting on you to get back inside.

Back in and Eddie uses the referee as a distraction to hammer away at Kurt, which earns him a hard running clothesline. Eddie grabs a Saito suplex and it’s off to a front facelock. The fans are behind Angle because they don’t appreciated a good Zorro, even if he was wearing lime green tights. A chinlock slows things down for a good while until it’s off to a figure four necklock to keep Angle on the mat.

Angle reverses into an ankle lock but Eddie is right back out of it and hammering away in the corner. For some reason Eddie tries a German suplex and I’m sure you can tell what that means. Since one isn’t enough it’s time to roll some German suplexes on Guerrero. The Angle Slam is reversed into a cradle for two, followed by a tornado DDT for the same.

Eddie can’t keep the El Paso Lasso on for very long as Angle reverses into the ankle lock. That doesn’t work either as Eddie gets in a low blow, followed by the brainbuster. Eddie takes too long going up though, allowing Angle to shove the referee into the corner to crotch him down. Cue Chavo for a failed interference but Benoit comes in with a belt to Angle’s head, allowing the frog splash to give Eddie the pin.

Rating: B. The long chinlocks brought things down a bit but sweet goodness these two are talented guys. It’s no wonder why they would be in a World Title match at Wrestlemania in a year and a half, which is the kind of spot that these two deserve. The interference made sense here too, which doesn’t happen often but if it’s properly done, it can really enhance a match.

Benoit hits Eddie with the belt as well.

Angle storms into the party and accuses the guy in the Scream mask of being Benoit. It turns out that it’s Brother Love, which is amusing enough. Benoit comes in and they trade holds until the Angle Slam puts Benoit through a table but Benoit hits him with a bottle on the way down, leaving both guys out.

Brock Lesnar vs. Rey Mysterio

Non-title. Rey starts a chase early on and drops a leg across Brock’s back as he gets inside. A rollup is easily blocked and Rey heads outside again, this time faking Brock out by hiding behind the steps. Rey gets in a dropkick but gets thrown into the post to put Brock in control for the first time. Back in and we hit an over the shoulder backbreaker, followed by a release overhead belly to belly. Lesnar misses a charge into the post and takes a 619 to the ribs…but here’s Big Show to throw Rey into the crowd for the DQ.

Rating: C. The match was getting my attention and then never mind because it’s BIG SHOW TIME! Above all else, this match made me realize one thing: Lesnar rarely fights anything but power guys. The guy was the NCAA Heavyweight Champion and can probably out-wrestle anyone not named Kurt but for some reason all he gets are power guys. He and Mysterio were having an entertaining match because it was something Lesnar doesn’t get to do very often but instead, let’s go with another power opponent.

Lesnar gets beaten up and put through the announcers’ table to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Let the wrestling roll. This show is the opposite of Raw where it’s a bunch of stupid stuff with one good match in the middle to keep things watchable. Instead, Smackdown is a show with a bunch of wrestling (two matches breaking thirteen minutes) and a little nonsense thrown in. The Bischoff vs. Stephanie stuff is stupid but the witch costume made up for a good chunk of it. Couple that with the great three way tag team feud and this show is consistently putting out some of the most entertaining week to week stuff I can remember in a long time.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the NXT: The Full Sail Years Volumes I and II, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/03/24/kbs-history-of-nxt-volumes-1-and-2-now-available-in-paperback/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Smackdown – October 24, 2002: How Do You Like Your Wrestling?

Smackdown
Date: October 24, 2002
Location: Pyramid, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Tazz, Michael Cole

With No Mercy done (and Undertaker probably still bleeding), it’s time to start the road towards Survivor Series in about a month. The real buzz is about the Tag Team Titles though after Chris Benoit and Kurt Angle became the inaugural champions in a masterpiece. Unlike Raw, there are a few things I’m excited to see develop so let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Matt Hardy vs. Rikishi

This is fallout from Matt getting a Stinkface last week. Before we get started though, did you know that Mattitude is practiced in over 100 countries or that Matt’s bedtime is 4am? Rikishi wipes himself with Matt’s shirt before taking him down off a clothesline. Matt’s top rope clothesline gets two but the rotund Samoan wins a slugout. A Stinkface doesn’t work but Matt is shoved away from the Twist of Fate, setting up the Rikishi Driver (I’ve missed that one) for the pin. Cole: “Mattitude has been deleted!”

Rating: D+. So Matt gets a new, amazing gimmick (which he probably came up with himself) and gets to lose clean to Rikishi to pay off a moment where he got humiliated. I mean, it’s not as bad as almost anything Raw has done lately but this isn’t the brightest booking in the world.

Rikishi dances post match but Big Show comes in and lays him out. Wasn’t he teasing a face turn on Raw? Show challenges Lesnar for the title.

Here’s Stephanie McMahon to present a trophy to Benoit and Angle. Kurt says he lead his team to victory last night so he’ll accept the trophy and put it on his Wall of Fame at home. Benoit grabs the trophy and says if it wasn’t for Stephanie’s ruling, he would have taken Angle out a long time ago. Angle says it’s his because he got the submission last night. They fight over the trophy and Stephanie gets hit in the face as the thing breaks. That earns both of them a slap to the face before Stephanie makes a match for the broken trophy.

Cruiserweight Title: Jamie Noble vs. Tajiri

Noble, dressed as Elvis of course, is defending in a rematch from their good effort on Sunday. Tajiri hits the ring after a lame impression and elbows the wig off the champ. Of course Tajiri puts the wig on for a little dance before dropping Noble (still in the Elvis jacket) into the corner. The Tarantula is broken up and Nidia offers a distraction, meaning Tajiri kicks the post by mistake. Back in and Noble kicks the leg out but can’t hit the Tiger Bomb. Nidia gets on the apron but Tajiri kicks the bickering couple together, only to get rolled up (with an assist from Nidia) to retain the title.

Rating: C-. These two work well together but you need more than four minutes to make something like this go. Noble has been champion for about four months now and I really don’t think anyone has noticed. I know the idea was to have Mysterio fix the division but when he’s doing all that other great stuff, it seems like a waste of time.

Tazz has the wig and we hear about next week’s Halloween party.

Dawn Marie, with the lowest cut dress legal by law, finds Torrie and apologizes for her behavior in recent weeks. She really cares for Al but she’ll break it off for the sake of Torrie and her family. Torrie says great and walks away, not really convinced.

Eddie and Chavo have a standoff with Angle and tell him that Benoit had some plans for him after the tournament was over. Naturally Angle believes him and tensions continue to heighten.

Edge/Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero/Chavo Guerrero

The winners get a title shot at some point in the future. Edge and Chavo start things off with Edge’s armbar not getting him anywhere. Instead a shoulder puts Chavo down but he gets his knees up to block Rey’s springboard moonsault. Everything breaks down in a hurry with Rey sending the Guerreros outside but face miscommunication lets Eddie take over.

Eddie elbows Rey in the mask and it’s time to work on the ribs and back, which were banged up on Sunday. I love when they remember stuff from just a few days ago. A pumphandle backbreaker gives Eddie two and Chavo’s tilt-a-whirl version gets the same. Rey dropkicks Chavo into his cousin though and it’s off to Edge as things speed up again. An Edge-O-Matic gets two on Eddie but he’s still able to save Chavo from the 619.

Instead it’s the spear for two on Chavo, followed by the 619. A powerbomb/springboard seated senton crushes Chavo but Eddie makes the save with a slingshot hilo. The referee goes after Eddie, allowing Rey to sneak in a springboard legdrop to give Edge the pin. Eddie not realizing what was going on behind him gives us a great visual.

Rating: B. This didn’t have the time to work as well as their other stuff but these people are incapable of having a bad match at this point. Mysterio and Edge vs. Benoit and Angle in a rematch makes perfect sense after their masterpiece on Sunday. I’m sure the Guerreros will get in on the titles soon enough because they’re too good to leave out.

Undertaker is looking for Lesnar. Why would that feud continue?

Video on the Cell, narrated by Paul Heyman, about how Lesnar owns him now.

Here’s a limping Undertaker to call Lesnar out. He gets Heyman instead because Lesnar has no interest in hearing what Undertaker has to say. Scratch that though as Lesnar comes out and gets right in the ring anyway. So why was Heyman necessary there? Everyone has told Undertaker that his hand injury cost him the match but the reality is that Lesnar had his number on Sunday. Five years ago the hand wouldn’t have mattered but it mattered on Sunday.

Now the purists are going to complain about Lesnar bringing in Undertaker’s personal life (that sounds rather out of character for Undertaker) but he understands head games. He’s fought and beaten the best but Sunday, Lesnar was the better man. Undertaker goes to leave when Brock stops him and takes the mic. As for Sara, Brock needed and edge but he’s supposed to be all about business. I guess that’s an apology and leaning towards a face turn for Lesnar?

Brock and Heyman leave but Heyman stops and nods in respect to Undertaker. We’re not done though as Undertaker says that after twelve years, his body is…..going to be interrupted by Big Show. He can’t believe what he’s hearing because it’s been him beating Undertaker up for the last two years, not Lesnar. Undertaker says he’d rather be a broken down has been than a giant never was.

It’s time to leave again but this time Big Show follows and eventually passes Undertaker. Ever the moron (he is a face you know), Undertaker poses on the edge of the stage. Big Show, gorilla press, crash (onto what looks like a big pad that we never get a good look at). This took WAY too long to set up Big Show vs. Undertaker.

Post break some of the locker room has come out to check on Undertaker. Stephanie has now decided that she’s a medical expert and is bossing the EMT’s around. Undertaker is slowly put on a stretcher as Stephanie threatens the medical people if they don’t get him out of here faster. Eventually he gets off the stretcher and stumbles around with Arn Anderson shouting “LET US HELP YOU TAKE!” Agents eventually help walk him to the back.

And now, Dawn Marie! She tells Al that they should say goodbye now before turning around. See, she’s only been with a few men and he was the most passionate. Kissing ensues.

John Cena vs. Billy Kidman

Rematch from last week when Cena cheated to win. A dropkick puts Cena on the floor to start but a drive into the barricade has Kidman in trouble. Back in and a spinebuster gives Cena two but Kidman hits some more dropkicks. A middle rope back elbow to the jaw drops Cena and a hurricanrana (with a handful of rope) puts John away. So to recap we have two cheaters with .500 record in recent weeks. The WWE formula in a nutshell.

Cena lays Kidman out post match and shows some fire. I mean it’s some slightly extinguished fire because he just lost but that’s common around here.

Lesnar gets interviewed and wants to know where Funaki is. Anyway if Big Show wants a fight, he’s not hard to find.

Eddie apologizes to Benoit for what’s happened between them and offers to show some respect. Benoit smells an ulterior motive.

Big Show goes into Lesnar’s locker room. Heyman tries to talk things down but Brock says Show can have a title shot.

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

For a broken trophy. Angle takes over on the mat to start and Benoit looks annoyed at not being able to sit out on him. Kurt does it again until Benoit elbows him in the face for the break. A hard clothesline cuts Benoit off and a belly to back gets two. They’re not really following up on stuff here as it’s one move and then a breather before they do anything else.

Benoit speeds things up a bit with a clothesline to the back of the head, followed by some rolling German suplexes. It’s hard not to cringe watching their heads slam off the mat like that. Angle reverses the third suplex into two of his own but the Angle Slam is reversed into a release German suplex. One heck of a Swan Dive gets two so we hit the Crossface.

Angle rolls him over and reverses into the ankle lock but Benoit small packages him for two. The Angle Slam connects for the same and it’s back to the ankle. That’s reversed back into the Crossface but Angle reverses that as well. Benoit goes up and gets belly to bellied right back down….but here are the Guerreros for a distraction so Chavo can hit Angle with a belt, giving Benoit an easy pin. Benoit might not have seen what happened.

Rating: B. The match was good but they didn’t have nearly enough time to do what they’re capable of pulling off. These two have some of the best chemistry in wrestling and even if we’ve seen it multiple times, it’s cool to see them bust out all those ridiculous counters. The ending is annoying but if it gives us more Eddie greatness, I think I can live with it.

Angle pops up and hits a quick Angle Slam on Benoit, followed by breaking the trophy. I’m glad some things never change.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was good here but this one depends on your taste in stories. Lesnar vs. Big Show is just depressing, Dawn Marie and the Wilsons works for an obvious reason and the tag stuff is outstanding. If you can stand some of the slow paced stories and at times dumb ideas (What is Dawn doing this for?), you can get to the excellent wrestling. Unfortunately, Big Show coming in at such a high place isn’t going to help anything as I’d be more than fine with Lesnar vs. most of the Smackdown Six. The good stuff is REALLY good right now though and that’s what matters most. Well that and no Katie Vick.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the NXT: The Full Sail Years Volumes I and II, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/03/24/kbs-history-of-nxt-volumes-1-and-2-now-available-in-paperback/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXV: Not So Fast

Wrestlemania XXV
Date: April 5, 2009
Location: Reliant Stadium, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 72,744
Commentators: Jim Ross, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

After last year’s great show, we get….this. Wrestlemania 25 is often listed alongside the worst Wrestlemanias of all time. I watched it live and thought it sucked other than the candidate for best match ever in the middle of it. This is one of the ones that I wasn’t looking forward to but I have to be tortured for this job. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video of people being asked what the biggest moment in Wrestlemania history is over the first 25 years (let me get this out of the way: IT WAS TWENTY FOUR AT THAT TIME. This drove me CRAZY at the time because the show was built up as the 25th anniversary of the show, but that isn’t how things work. Think about it: when you get married, the day a year later is your first anniversary, meaning that Wrestlemania 2 would be the first anniversary, Wrestlemania 3 is your second anniversary and so on to Wrestlemania 25 being the TWENTY FOURTH ANNIVERARY, NOT THE TWENTY FIFTH!).

Anyway the answers are exactly what you would expect: ladder match, Hogan slamming Andre, Hogan vs. Warrior etc. This leads to a video of people saying they’re making the top moment tonight.

Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls sings America the Beautiful.

MVP vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Christian vs. Kofi Kingston vs. CM Punk vs. Finlay vs. Mark Henry vs. Kane

MITB here. Henry has Tony Atlas with him, MVP is the face US Champion and Kofi is still Jamaican. BIG pop for Christian here. It’s a big brawl to start as the fans are solidly behind Christian here. Christian and Shelton run over Henry with the big ladder but Kofi jumps over it and takes both guys down. There’s a Boom Drop onto the ladder onto both guys. The ladder is set up in the ring but here’s Kane to beat everyone up.

Henry and Kane go up the ladder but everyone bands together to pull them down. The monsters are both sent to the floor and a second regular sized ladder is set up. A bunch of people go up but Kane and Henry shove everyone down. Kane kicks Henry down and loads up the big ladder again. Henry breaks up that attempt but opts to throw the ladder at Finlay instead of climbing.

Finlay dives through the ropes at Kane and Shelton so Christian can dive onto Finlay and Kane to take them out. MVP dives on all three of them and Kofi and Punk hit stereo suicide dives to take out all four guys. Shelton climbs onto the huge ladder and DIVES onto all five guys, looking like he landed on his head at first look. Now HENRY goes up top but Finlay breaks it up to prevent an earthquake.

Horny slides in his own ladder to climb onto Henry’s back and dive onto all six guys on the floor. Finlay is the only guy standing and throws in a big ladder, but he had to fight Kofi. Kofi dives THROUGH the ladder and drops it onto Finlay for good measure. Finlay drops him with the Horny ladder and does the same to Christian and Kane. The Irishman tries to go up but Kofi kicks him down.

Kingston tries for a climb but Henry is back again and shoves down the ladder. In an AWESOME spot, Henry holds the ladder to set it in place and Kofi runs up, only to be dropped down and hit with a World’s Strongest Slam onto the ladder. MVP slides a ladder into the standing one to make a kind of platform. Shelton slides under the ladder and kicks MVP in the ribs. MVP comes back with a kind of powerbomb on Benjamin but Punk stops the climb.

Now it’s Christian and Punk with Punk on the ladder and Christian on the platform. Now they’re both on the same side of the ladder and Christian hits the Killswitch off the ladder. By hits I mean Christian drops him in midair and Punk’s head never came within three feet of the mat but you do what you can I guess. MVP climbs up but Shelton climbs a ladder on the floor to get to the platform to get to the ladder for a sunset bomb to MVP. By sunset bomb, I mean he doesn’t get MVP over and basically pulls MVP’s face down the ladder. That’s two big blown spots in a row.

MVP is up first and pounds on Shelton before being powerbombed over the top rope and down onto a few guys. His head looked to smack against the barricade in a scary spot. Shelton and Finlay are on the ladder now and Finlay is knocked onto the ladder platform. Christian takes Shelton down and pounds away until Shelton takes the platform apart.

Shelton and Christian are both standing on two ladders but Christian shoves Shelton to the floor. Punk however springboards onto the ladders but gets caught upside down in a ladder, which is what Punk did to Christian to win last year. Kane stops Christian and chokeshoves him down to the mat. Punk pops up and kicks Kane down to win his second straight MITB.

Rating: B-. The blown spots REALLY bring this down because they were some terribly blown spots. Punk winning is fine as it was eventually the catalyst for his heel turn but that wouldn’t be for about six months. The match was good and having some fresh blood with Kofi out there helped, but the match overall was a letdown compared to other years, as the problem becomes “how do you top the other stuff?”. Still good though.

Video on WWE taking over Houston for the week.

Now we get to the part of this show which makes fans’ heads hurt: a TWELVE MINUTE Kid Rock song medley. Keep in mind that a unification match for the two sets of tag titles was on the preshow and ran about 9 minutes. THAT can’t make Wrestlemania but this nonsense can. This is to set up the Miss Wrestlemania battle royal.

Miss Wrestlemania: Divas Battle Royal

Melina, Beth Phoenix, Santina Marella, Victoria, Brie Bella, Eve Torres, Gail Kim, Jackie Gayda, Tiffany, Sunny, Rosa Mendes, Nikki Bella, Jillian Hall, Joy Giovanni, Katie Lea Burchill, Kelly Kelly, Layla, Maria, Maryse, Michelle McCool, Mickie James, Molly Holly, Natalya, Alicia Fox, Rosa Mendes, Torrie Wilson

The medley contains the entrances for all 25 girls, none of whom get entrances or even introductions, so the fans have no idea who all is in this thing for the most part. Justin Roberts is reading the rules and people are already being eliminated. Not that we’re told WHO THEY ARE or anything but whatever. Oh and you can go through the ropes too. Cole: “You can get a look at all the entrants in this on WWE.com!” Yeah, that’s the only way to see them because KID ROCK had to eat up all their time.

Sunny, Torrie, Layla and Rosa are out for sure but the rest of them aren’t even mentioned. Gail and Jillian eliminate each other as Beth eliminates Tiffany and some other chick not mentioned. Molly and Kelly are put out as is Maryse. Beth dumps both Bellas and the only Divas left are Michelle, Mickie, Melina and Beth. Mickie and Michelle eliminate each other but Santina eliminates the other two. It’s Santino in drag if that wasn’t clear. Yeah, THIS is your payoff for bringing back all those famous chicks. This led to months of STUPID jokes and skits about them being brother and sister or something. No rating but this was awful.

Beth is ticked off, which led to months of stupid fights between the two of them. Santina dances post match.

We recap Jericho vs. Piper/Snuka/Steamboat which is built around the Mickey Rourke movie The Wrestler. The idea is that Jericho insulted Rourke and the movie because it’s not the same as getting in the ring. Rourke said he’d fight at Mania then backpedaled. We then had Jericho insult Snuka, Piper and Steamboat for sticking around too long. Flair was insulted as well but since Flair can’t wrestle anymore, Jericho beat up and challenged the other legends to a match here tonight.

Rourke is at ringside.

Chris Jericho vs. Roddy Piper/Jimmy Snuka/Ricky Steamboat

Flair is here to support his fellow old people. If I had to guess, I’d say he’s somewhere between smashed and alcohol poisoning. Jericho has to beat all three legends to win so he starts with Piper. Roddy looks bad but considering less than two years earlier he was diagnosed with lymphoma, this is pretty impressive.

Piper fires away to start and takes it to the mat before hooking a quick sunset flip for two. A kind of dropkick puts Chris down and Roddy pounds away in the corner. Jimmy comes in and the match turns into slow motion. To be fair he’s about 65 here. Ricky comes in and starts cranking on the arm as you would expect him to. Back to Jimmy for a double chop although only Ricky’s actually hits. Out of nowhere Jericho puts on the Walls for the elimination.

Piper comes back in and works over the ribs before throwing on the sleeper. It only lasts for a few seconds though before Jericho rams him into the top rope and gets the elimination via a running enziguri. This leaves Steamboat vs. Jericho with the Dragon coming in with the top rope cross body for a VERY close near fall. A snapmare puts Ricky down and jericho kicks him in the back before putting on a chinlock. In the STUPID part of the show, Jericho throws Steamboat over the ropes for him to skin the cat, but LET’S LOOK AT FLAIR INSTEAD!

Jericho gets backdropped over the top to the floor and IT’S A FLYING OLD MAN to take Jericho down again. Back in and a top rope chop has Jericho reeling. Steamboat jumps over Chris out of the corner and gets a rollup for two. Jericho finally hits the bulldog but the Lionsault misses. Ricky grabs a powerslam out of nowhere for two but gets caught in the Walls. Steamboat reverses THAT into a small package for the hottest two count you’ll see in years. If that’s not enough, Steamboat backflips out of a belly to back suplex, only to walk into the Codebreaker to let Jericho survive.

Rating: B-. WOW Steamboat had me going here and I knew what the ending was. Steamboat was 56 years old here and hadn’t wrestled regularly in FIFTEEN YEARS and just had the crowd actually believing he could beat Jericho five months after he lost the world title. That’s ASTONISHING and would lead to a one on one match between these two at Backlash. Snuka and Piper were there for one last hurrah but Steamboat was trying to steal the show and came pretty freaking close. This is a great example of a match with NO reason to be good which wound up being pretty sweet.

Post match Flair comes in but gets beaten down too. Jericho taunts Rourke (a real life former pro boxer) and gets punched out. This somehow took five minutes.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy. The idea is that stuff had started happening to Jeff such as pyro nearly blinding him, someone trying to run him off the road, and BURNING HIS HOUSE DOWN. At Royal Rumble, Matt revealed that it was him behind it because he was jealous of Jeff’s success. Naturally, no charges were ever filed or anything like that, because why do that when you can have an extreme rules match here instead?

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

Matt now has regular tights instead of the cargo jeans. Jeff takes him down and pounds away to start before heading to the floor. A hard poster to the head doesn’t do much to Matt, presumably BECAUSE IT WAS A POSTER. The steps work a bit better and there’s Poetry in Motion against the barricade to crush Matt. Back in and Poetry in Motion hits the corner instead of Matt and the Whisper in the Wind only hits chair.

Matt chokes away on the ropes and punches away at Jeff’s head. The Side Effect onto a chair gets two so Matt bends Jeff’s back around the post. It’s table time but Jeff fights off a suplex through said table and hits a running clothesline off the apron. Jeff busts out a kendo stick and a crutch to beat on Matt’s back before putting a trashcan over Matt’s head for the slingshot dropkick for two.

There goes Jeff’s shirt but the Swanton completely misses. The Twist of Fate gets two for Matt and he’s getting frustrated. Matt calls for a Swanton but gets caught in a superplex instead for no cover. There’s a BIG chair shot to Matt’s head which sends him to the floor. Jeff lays Matt on the table before putting another table on top of that table. There’s a HUGE splash through both tables along with Matt to leave everyone laying.

Back in and that only gets two, and now it’s time for the ladders required by a Hardys match. A legdrop keeps Matt down and the ladder is set up. Make that two ladders with one being bigger than the other. Jeff climbs the small ladder and jumps over the tall ladder, only to miss his big legdrop. Matt puts Jeff’s neck in the chair for a Twist of Fate to finally end this.

Rating: B. This was a solid brawl but it would all go downhill from here. Their feud didn’t ever quite work for the most part because the audience wasn’t all that interested and Matt didn’t work as a top heel. As for this match though, they beat the tar out of each other and Matt looked violent and evil. Unfortunately he couldn’t back that up for the most part.

Orton is ready for the main event.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Rey is challenging. JBL goes on a rant about how much Texas sucks and how they’ve lost their backbone. After this match is over, JBL is bailing on Texas and heading back to New York where he loves to be. Rey is the Joker from Dark Knight this year. They actually do big match intros here which isn’t something you see for a midcard title match. The referee reads them the rules and JBL kicks Rey in the head. Now the bell rings and Rey hits an enziguri, the 619 and a top rope splash for the pin and the title in about 20 seconds.

Post match JBL says he quits, which is his actual retirement as he’s never wrestled since.

We recap Shawn vs. Undertaker. Shawn freed himself from JBL at No Way Out and realized he needed a new challenge. What better for Mr. Wrestlemania to do than challenge the Streak? Shawn read passages from the Bible about separating light from darkness to show the differences between the two of them. Do you need more of a buildup than that?

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn comes down from the top of the set all in white, Undertaker comes through the stage in black. Now THAT is an entrance. Feeling out process to start with Shawn circling around Taker and sticking with a few jabs here and there. Michaels pounds away in the corner and hits a hard chop but taker catches an incoming right hand. Taker LAUNCHES him into the corner and nearly out to the floor, only for Shawn to jump off the top and over Undertaker to get away.

Shawn might have hurt his knee but he’s channeling his inner Bret by goldbricking. Taker will have none of that and throws Shawn into the corner for more punishment. Michaels comes back with chops in the corner but gets backdropped down to stop the momentum. Taker drives some shoulder into Shawn but Shawn takes him down with a clothesline. The reverse Figure Four (called a regular one by that idiot Michael Cole) has Taker in trouble but he finally slugs his way out of it.

Taker pounds way in the corner but has to stop to shake life back into his leg. Snake eyes and the big boot put Shawn down and a legdrop gets two (brother). A chokeslam is countered into the Crossface by Shawn but Taker rolls over onto his side to block a lot of the pressure. After an attempted rollup by Undertaker, Shawn cranks on the hold a bit more, only to have Taker fight up and hit a big side slam for two. Back up and they slug it out with Shawn taking over via a flying forearm.

There’s the nipup but Shawn doesn’t tune up the band. Instead it’s a pair of atomic drops and a clothesline but as Shawn goes up, he jumps into the chokeslam. He escapes THAT and tries the superkick but is too far away, meaning the kick only hits Taker’s chest. It puts Taker down so Shawn tries the Figure Four but Taker counters into Hell’s Gate. Shawn flails around and gets a foot on the rope for a fast break but he’s clearly staggered.

We head to the floor for a bit but Taker misses the apron legdrop. A baseball slide keeps Taker on the floor but as Shawn tries the moonsault to the floor, Taker moves and Shawn CRASHES onto the concrete. Back inside and Taker sits up and busts out the Taker Dive, only to overrotate and CRASH in a terrifying landing. Shawn thankfully pulled a cameraman in the way to block some of the impact but this scared me to death live.

Shawn tells the referee to count in a kind of mid-match heel turn but Taker makes it back in at nine. Another superkick attempt is ducked and a HUGE chokeslam gets an insanely close two. The fans are getting way into these near falls now. The Tombstone is countered, the superkick is blocked, the chokeslam is escaped and NOW the superkick hits for a very delayed two count. Shawn is up now and looks all ticked off.

Taker grabs him by the throat but the Last Ride is countered into a sunset flip bid, but THAT is countered into the biggest Last Ride ever for two. Watching this match for probably the fourth time I actually thought that was the finish. Think about that for a minute. Taker goes up top and misses a top rope elbow but as Shawn tries to skin the cat, Undertaker catches him in the Tombstone. He sticks the tongue out but THAT gets two, I believe making Shawn either the first or second guy ever to kick out of all three of Taker’s finishers.

Taker nearly collapses from the shock and has a look on his face saying he has no idea where to go now. Shawn spins out of a Tombstone bid into a DDT and both guys are down. Michaels slowly crawls to the top and drops the elbow for no cover. Instead he tunes up the band again and the fans are all over him as a result. The kick hits clean and Shawn covers almost immediately but it only gets two. These kickouts are getting better and better each time.

They fight up from their knees and use each other to pull themselves up before slugging it out with everything they’ve got. A big boot puts Shawn down but Taker charges into a boot in the corner to put him down. Shawn climbs up top and tries a moonsault press, but Taker somehow catches him in mid air for another Tombstone to make him 16-0, and that’s your match of the year.

Rating: A+. Masterpiece, excellent, classic, best match they’ve ever had, best match of all time candidate etc. Pick one, as they’re all appropriate. This is one of the only matches ever where I’ve been on the edge of my seat the entire time and lost my mind on the kickouts. Absolutely outstanding here and one of the best matches I’ve ever seen, and that covers quite a bit of ground.

Now what gets to follow that?

We recap Edge vs. Big Show vs. Cena for the Raw Title. Edge switched brands at No Way Out after losing the WWE Title and won the World Title in the other Chamber match, because the titles are interchangeable props which you can pass around like this for no apparent reason. Edge’s wife Vickie was blackmailed into putting Cena into a triple threat match because Cena had video of Show and Vickie having an affair. This is basically a glorified handicap match.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. Big Show vs. John Cena

Edge is defending and Vickie is STILL in the wheelchair. Cena’s big entrance this year: an army of probably 60 guys dressed in Cena gear make a tunnel for the real Cena to run through, complete with the old Word Life theme song. Cena fights off both guys but the numbers catch up with him, allowing the heels to take him down. Edge is knocked to the floor and it’s back to Cena who gets beaten down by the monster.

Show goes outside to get Edge but the champion dropkicks the steps into Show’s knees, allowing Cena to hit the top rope Fameasser to drive Show’s face into the floor. Back in and Cena tries a quick AA, only to be countered into the Edgecution for two. Show comes back in with a side slam for two on John but Cena comes back with right hands. When those don’t do much he tries to hit the ropes but Vickie’s nephew Chavo pulls him to the floor. That earns him an AA and we head back inside where John knocks Show into the ropes to tie him up. Show: “GET ME OUT OF HERE!”

Cena beats down Edge and now has a free shot at Big Show. Instead he hits the Shuffle on Edge which is actually pretty smart when you think about it. Here comes the AA but Vickie gets on the apron. Cena drops Edge but avoids a spear, sending Edge into Vickie. The distraction lets Cena roll Edge up for two but a collision puts both guys down. Show gets loose and beats up both other guys including hitting a splash to both guys in the same corner.

Cena escapes a double chokeslam but can’t get the AA. Instead Show hits him with the WMD but instead of, I don’t know, COVERING, he goes to the floor after Edge. Edge counters a chokeslam into a DDT on the floor and all three guys are down. The champion crawls over to the steps and sets them right next to Show. With a running start, Edge uses the steps as a springboard and dives at Show, sending both of them through the barricade and into the crowd.

Back in and Edge gets two on Cena but the spear is countered into the STF. John pulls it back to the center of the ring but Big Show breaks it up by grabbing Cena’s throat. A Vader Bomb elbow misses Edge and everyone is down again. In a rare sight, Edge and Cena team up to suplex Show down and then clothesline him to the floor.

The Throwback puts Edge down but as Cena goes up, Show shoves him off and into a spear from Edge for two. Everyone is inside again and Show charges into a boot from Edge. The champion tries a sleeper on Show, so in the HOW DID HE DO THAT spot of the year, Cena AA’s BOTH OF THEM AT THE SAME TIME. Edge slides off and Show takes the full brunt. Cena hits an AA on Edge onto Big Show and pins the giant for the title.

Rating: B-. Fine but it’s another meaningless title change in a year which would be full of such things. Edge would get the title back at Backlash to make sure that these title reigns are as forgettable as possible and give us Cena vs. Big Show for about the ninth time. The match was just ok for the most part until the eye popping finish.

Wrestlemania 26 is in Phoenix.

Now we get the Hall of Fame class: Terry and Dory Funk, Howard Finkel, Koko B. Ware, the Von Erichs and Ricky Steamboat. Oh and Steve Austin. Yeah him too. He takes off his suit and rides his ATV around ringside for one last moment.

This brings us to the main event of HHH vs. Orton. This was basically a continuation of Orton vs. the McMahons with HHH being the big soldier to fight in the war. Vince and Shane had already been taken out and Orton won the Rumble to get us here. With HHH firmly in his sights (again), Orton went on the attack.

One night on Raw, HHH was knocked into the ropes and tied up as Stephanie came down. Orton gave Stephanie the Elevated DDT before kissing her on the lips, further enraging HHH. At one point in the rivalry, HHH broke into Orton’s house and threw him through a window. Orton decided to fight HHH at Wrestlemania instead of pressing charges. The stage was perfectly set for the great beat down by HHH, allowing him to let out all of his aggression and rage on Orton.

While not the greatest story in the world, at least there was a solid idea and we should get a solid brawl out of things. There’s nothing wrong with a good old fashioned beating of a hated rival is there? Well apparently WWE saw something wrong with it, because there was a stipulation added: if HHH gets countered out or more importantly disqualified, he loses the WWE Title. Upon hearing this, everyone collectively said HUH?

This stipulation made no sense. The whole point of the match was to see HHH beat the stuffing out of Orton once and for all. What possible good could there be to make it a match where HHH had to keep calm and play by the rules? For some reason, this is what we got at Wrestlemania XXV.

HHH(c) vs. Randy Orton

HHH has a cool entrance here as he swings his hammer at the camera, only to reveal that it’s a big mirror that he shatters. They stare at each other for a bit before HHH takes Orton down and pounds away. The champion stomps on Orton in the corner and is threatened with a DQ, showing us how stupid this gimmick is. With HHH yelling at the referee, Orton grabs an RKO out of nowhere a minute and five seconds in. The Punt misses and there’s the Pedigree but HHH can’t follow up.

Orton is sent to the floor and rammed into the announce table before heading back in for more right hands. HHH catapults Orton throat first into the bottom rope before dropping some knees on the head. Randy heads back to the floor and counters a whip to send HHH into the steps. HHH gets whipped into the timekeeper’s table which apparently hurt his shoulder. Orton tries to get the countout to get the title but the Game is back in at nine.

Randy drops some knees and kicks to the ribs and it’s off to the chinlock. Back up after a few moments in the hold and HHH punches his way out of the corner. The jumping knee to Orton’s face puts him down and there’s the facebuster for good measure. The Pedigree is countered into a catapult though, sending HHH face first into the buckle. Not that it really matters though as a clothesline puts Orton down for two as the slow pace finally picks up a bit.

HHH gets shoved off the top but Orton dives off the top into a boot. A rollup gets two for the champion and they slug it out some more. The spinebuster puts Randy down but the Pedigree is countered into Orton’s backbreaker for two. HHH gets in another clothesline and goes up for some reason, only to jump into a dropkick. A kick to HHH’s ribs is caught and Orton is flipped over the top and out to the floor. They head over to the announce table and HHH picks up a monitor but drops it for fear of losing the title.

The champion tries a Pedigree on the announce table, only to be backdropped down onto the table which doesn’t break. With HHH still on the table, Orton hits the Elevated DDT to drive HHH head first into the floor. HHH still manages to get back in at 9 so Orton stomps away even more. Randy stomps away in the corner and chokes away as this is dragging again. HHH comes back but Orton throws HHH into the referee. There’s the RKO but the referee is down.

With no referee, Orton goes to the floor and gets a sledgehammer, but as he gets back inside HHH punts him in the head. A shot to the head with the sledgehammer puts Orton down and HHH pounds away. Orton is out cold so HHH hits another Pedigree for good measure and retains the title.

Rating: D. Erg that was awful. This was the same problem they had with the Cena vs. HHH match from a few years ago, where it felt like they were trying for something epic that told a story but it didn’t work at all. Instead it was these two punching and kicking a lot while having to stop because they might get disqualified. This didn’t work at all because the match didn’t fit the buildup, which was only decent in the first place.

HHH stands over Orton’s body like a viking standing over a big kill to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. There’s a lot to say here. First and foremost, this show is WAY better than I remember it with only two bad matches the whole way through. Unfortunately, the first of those two matches is after a nearly fifteen minute concert which no one wanted to see. The other match though is the main event which counting recap, entrances and post match stuff is nearly 40 minutes. That match is like a sledgehammer to the knees of this show and is easily one of the worst main events in Mania history.

On the other hand, the rest of the show is shockingly good, but it falls short of what it could have been in places. MITB is probably the worst yet but still solid, the Legends match was good but had absolutely no right to be, the Hardy match was good but nothing more, and the triple threat was about the same. The problem here is that one match is all anyone really remembers from this show other than a few individual moments. The memory of the main event hurts this thing a lot as it’s the only thing people remember other than the Streak match. Much better show than I remember, but it’s no classic.

Ratings Comparison

Finlay vs. Christian vs. CM Punk vs. Mark Henry vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Kane

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Divas Battle Royal

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Roddy Piper/Jimmy Snuka/Ricky Steamboat vs. Chris Jericho

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: C

Redo: B

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker

Original: A+

Redo: A+

John Cena vs. Edge vs. Big Show

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Randy Orton vs. HHH

Original: F+

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: D

Redo: B-

Did I mention this was the first live review I ever did?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/01/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-25-oh-dear-oh-dear-indeed/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the NXT: The Full Sail Years Volumes I and II, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/03/24/kbs-history-of-nxt-volumes-1-and-2-now-available-in-paperback/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXIV: WOO!

Wrestlemania XXIV
Date: March 30, 2008
Location: Citrus Bowl, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 74,365
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman, Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re going outside for the first time in a long time for this one. It’s also the first time the show has been in Florida which is odd for some reason. Anyway the main events here are Undertaker challenging Edge for the title and Orton defending against HHH and Cena. As for HHH’s life mate Shawn, he’s facing Flair in what was pretty clearly going to be Flair’s last match. Let’s get to it.

John Legend sings America the Beautiful.

The set is awesome with palm trees everywhere and a big canopy.

As usual, the big names on tonight’s show talk about how important this night is to them. It’s a used formula, but it always works.

This transitions into a video about how so many things can change in a year. People can return, champions can fall and surprises can occur, but it all culminates here.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Finlay

This is a Belfast Brawl which means street fight. Finlay was revealed to be Hornswoggle’s dad and JBL beat up the tiny man as a favor to Vince. Tonight it’s about revenge. Horny comes out with Finlay to appeal to the kids. Finlay charges at the ring and gets drilled by a knee to the head. JBL pounds away on the floor but gets sent shoulder first into the steps. We head inside for the opening bell and Finlay slides right back out to find some trashcans.

As he gets back in though JBL CRACKS him with a can and picks up some cookie sheets. Now the steps are brought in but JBL can’t powerbomb Finlay onto them. Some cookie sheet shots to the head put JBL down for two but a big boot does the same to Finlay. JBL stops to yell at Horny, allowing for the shot with that Irish club that I can’t spell. Since this is a WWE hardcore style match, it’s table time.

The table is set up in the corner but Finlay picks up the steps instead. JBL bails to the floor and beats on Horny, only to be rammed into the announce table by Papa Horny for his efforts. A trashcan lid to the head stops Finlay and gets two back inside, allowing JBL to pick up a trashcan and LAUNCH IT at Horny. That looked great.

Speaking of trashcans, a shot to JBL breaks up the Clothesline and Finlay blasts him with a lid for good measure. JBL is sent through the table for two and the fans are pleased. Finlay picks up the steps but gets blasted in the knee by a kendo stick, allowing JBL to knock him out with the Clothesline for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was fine. The whole point of this was to have a power brawl with some basic weapons which is what we got. I’m really not sure on JBL winning as the fans were solidly behind Horny and Finlay, but at least the match was entertaining and there were some hard shots in there. Good stuff here.

Kim Kardashian is guest hostess. She wasn’t famous for the most part yet here. Kennedy pops in and says he’ll win MITB and Kardashian is a little disturbed. Well to be fair she disturbs a lot of people so everything is even.

CM Punk vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. John Morrison vs. Chris Jericho vs. MVP vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito

Morrison is a tag champion and MVP is US Champion, having held it for nearly a year. Jericho is also Intercontinental Champion because what else is he supposed to do? Everyone goes after a ladder to start other than MVP who stays in the ring. Someone slides one in and MVP uses it to knock everyone down. Jericho brings in a big ladder and it’s time for a duel. MVP goes down and here’s Morrison to use his own ladder to send Jericho down.

In an awesome move, Morrison goes up top with the ladder and moonsaults down onto a bunch of guys at once. Kennedy uses the distraction to go up but Jericho makes the save. He tries a catapult on Kennedy but sends him onto the ladder by mistake. Morrison dives onto the ladder to stop Kennedy but Shelton climbs his own ladder to make it a three way race. Kennedy loads up a superplex on Morrison but Shelton jumps over both of them with a sunset flip to make it a Tower of Doom. Cool spot.

Carlito tries to shove Shelton off the ladder but he lands on the top rope on his feet. Shelton shoves the ladder at Carlito and tries to dive onto said ladder but it gives way. Punk stops Shelton from going up and hits the GTS but Kennedy stops him with the rolling fireman’s carry onto a ladder. MVP is back in now to kick Kennedy in the head but gets sent into a ladder by Carlito.

Shelton’s dragon whip CRACKS Carlito in the head but as he goes up, Kennedy and Carlito shove the ladder forward, sending Shelton over the top and through a ladder which was bridged between the ring and the barricade. Carlito and Kennedy go up but MVP breaks that up, only to be broken up by Morrison. Jericho breaks up Morrison’s attempt by putting him in the Walls on top of the ladder. Again, awesome. Kennedy tries to use the opening but Jericho throws John down and starts brawling.

Punk and Carlito dive at the ladders to make it a fourway with only Jericho lasting on top. Carlito comes back with the Backstabber off the ladder and everyone is down again. MVP goes up the ladder but here’s the returning Matt Hardy to stop him with a Twist of Fate off the ladder. Everyone is back in again and Jericho beats on all of them with the ladder. In a cool visual one ladder is jammed into the bottom of another, so as Morrison climbs the vertical (and unfolded) one, Jericho shoves it back into the corner and onto Punk.

Carlito and Jericho go up but Carlito spits apple in the face to break it up. Kennedy shoves Carlito off but gets hit in the ribs with a ladder by Punk. Jericho hits a Codebreaker with a ladder onto Punk to put everyone not named Jericho down. Punk goes up to stop Jericho but gets hit in the face by the briefcase. Punk climbs up again and knocks Jericho into the Tree of Woe with a shot to the head, allowing Punk to climb up and win the briefcase.

Rating: B. Good MITB here but as usual the high amount of people hurt it. Nothing here really stood out other than the Walls and Matt’s return, as you can only get so much out of the same spots we’ve seen before. It’s certainly good but it’s a step below some of the other stuff, and this would only get worse until we got some fresh blood in there. A power guy wouldn’t hurt either.

Orton, HHH and Cena are ready.

We look at the Hall of Fame induction ceremony from last night. The big deal of this was having Rock back to induct Rocky Johnson and Peter Maivia, his father and grandfather. The headliner though was Ric Flair who of course had everyone in tears.

Fink comes out to do the live introductions of this year’s class. They include the Brisco Brothers, Gordon Solie (represented by his kids), Johnson and Maivia, Eddie Graham, Mae Young (who tries to strip) and Flair (represented by his children, including Reid who died about three days before this was written).

Snoop Dog is here to emcee the Playboy match later and apparently has a friend in Festus. Heel Santino Marella comes up to say that he’s going to be at the match later but Snoop rings the bell to send Festus into a rage. Mick Foley pops up for a cameo, complete with Snoop Sock.

Batista vs. Umaga

This is a Battle for Brand Supremacy with Batista on the blue team and Umaga on the red team. Seriously that’s the whole story here. Regal and Teddy are here as GM’s/motivators. Slugout to start followed by Umaga missing a charge into the corner. Batista sends him to the floor but once back inside Umaga takes Big Dave down with a spinwheel kick (decent one too). A big unbooted foot sends Batista to the floor and Umaga is in full control.

Umaga gets nowhere off a quick nerve hold and gets even worse off a missed swan dive. Batista can’t slam him down though and Umaga falls on top for two. A HARD kick to Batista’s back sets up another nerve hold to keep things slow. Back up and Batista walks into a Samoan Drop for another near fall. They fight up again and Batista gets up a boot in the corner to slow Umaga down. After blocking the Samoan Spike, Batista hits a spinebuster and the “Batista Bomb” (read as Batista picks him up and falls backwards to send Umaga to the mat) for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was AWFUL with Batista doing nothing and being booed for most of his comeback. I can’t say I blame the fans either as the match was just dull all around. How this makes Smackdown bigger than Raw is beyond me but that’s what WWE says so who am I to argue? Match sucked.

We look at the tale of the tape for Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather, the latter being about as tall as my grandmother.

We look at the battle royal from the preshow with Kane winning a shot at the ECW Title.

ECW Title: Kane vs. Chavo Guerrero

In less time than it takes to type “in less time than it takes to type”, Kane chokeslams Chavo and pins him for the title. Match ran about 6 seconds.

Actress Raven Symone is here for some charity thing and SHOUTS ABOUT IT A LOT.

We recap Shawn vs. Flair. This was an odd build up as Vince said that the next match Flair lost would mean his retirement. This basically started Flair’s retirement tour as he held onto the title in upset after upset until he was all of a sudden on a roll. This led to Flair challenging Mr. Wrestlemania Shawn Michaels to a showdown at Wrestlemania, because if Flair can’t beat him he doesn’t want to keep going.

Flair was inducted into the Hall of Fame and it was made as clear as possible that Flair was going down to Shawn in Orlando. This led to a tear jerking video set to Leave the Memories Alone with a highlight reel of Flair’s career. The idea is that Shawn doesn’t want to do this but Flair wants Shawn to bring it.

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels

Feeling out process to start with neither guy being able to get the advantage. A hip toss puts Shawn down and Ric shouts about being Old Yeller, which Shawn referenced to set this up. Shawn chops him hard and Flair’s lip is bleeding. They slug it out in the corner with Shawn taking over and going up top, only to be slammed down. Now Flair goes up and hits a cross body for two. Jerry: “IT ACTUALLY WORKED!”

Ric goes after the knee but Shawn kicks him to the floor. Shawn loads up an Asai Moonsault and hits table, landing square on the edge ribs first. That looked HORRIBLE and Shawn is in big trouble. Back in and a belly to back suplex gets two for Flair. Naitch stays on the ribs and hits a good looking suplex for two. Shawn comes back with a backdrop to send Flair to the floor and follows up with a moonsault which mostly hits floor.

Both guys make it back inside at nine and they chop it out. The forearm and nipup connect and Shawn starts slugging away. A slam sets up Shawn’s top rope elbow but it hurts his ribs in the process. Michaels tunes up the band but can’t bring himself to do it, allowing Flair to grab the Figure Four which is quickly broken. They fight to the mat and try Flair’s bridge up out of a pinfall into the backslide but Ric is just too old.

Instead it’s a sunset flip for two for Shawn but Flair takes out the knee with a chop block. The Figure Four is countered into an inside cradle for two. NOW the Figure Four goes on in the middle of the ring but Shawn finally rolls it over into the ropes. Back up and Shawn hits the superkick out of nowhere but the cover only gets two. Shawn tunes up the band again but gets kicked low for two.

Michaels comes back with a reverse Figure Four but Flair manages to crawl to the ropes. A quick rollup with a handful of trunks gets two for Flair and he fires off chop after chop. Out of nowhere Shawn superkicks Flair down but Michaels can’t cover. Flair slowly gets up and says bring it. Shawn looks at him, says “I’m sorry. I love you.” and superkicks Flair into retirement.

Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade. The match itself was entertaining, but it wasn’t supposed to be a competitive spectacle. This was designed to give Flair a great match to go out on and they almost did that. They made no secret about who was winning and that’s ok, but at the same time it was like delaying the inevitable. It was a good match to send him out on and the fans were happy to see the famous spots one more time.

Flair gets a well deserved standing ovation. This match should have closed the show and was going to, but Flair said no because the title match should close the show. Usually I would agree but in this case, Flair should have ended the show. Ric takes the long walk up the ramp to nonstop applause.

Edge talks about being a Hulkamaniac at Wrestlemania 6 and watching his hero losing. His innocence was lost that day but it’s ok. His life has come full circle because people rely on Undertaker to win at Wrestlemania. Tonight he’s taking everyone innocence by breaking the streak.

Maria/Ashley vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina

This is a Playboy lumberjill match with Snoop Dogg as master of ceremonies in a golf cart. Snoop of course comes out with all of the lumberjills because that’s what Snoop would do. Ashley is her usual self and Maria looks great. Also, her theme song continues to be ridiculously catchy. Oh and Beth is Women’s Champion and has Santino with her. Melina has uh….wings.

Ashley tries to fight Beth and is immediately thrown around. Maria tries a double hip toss with Ashley which goes as well as you would expect two talentless models to be able to do. Melina is thrown to the floor and beaten up by the good Divas and takes a bad Bronco Buster from Maria. Ashley gets a running start to climb to the middle ropes to punch Melina as this mess continues. Melina takes over and catapults Ashley into a bearhug by Beth.

Melina hits a moonsault off of Beth’s shoulders for two before we get a stupid trip from Ashley. Off to Maria for some kicks as the lights go out. They finally get a spotlight on as this continues to fall apart. Maria tries to counter the Glam Slam into a bulldog but can’t even do that right. Melina breaks up the pin and we get heel miscommunication. Maria hits a kind of top rope bulldog but Santino breaks up the pin. Lawler punches out Santino but Beth hits a fisherman’s buster for the pin on Maria.

Rating: F+. That’s ALL for Maria looking great. I forgot this match was a lumberjill match after about a minute and the rest of the girls couldn’t even be seen after that long. Maria was TERRIBLE here and she was the better worker on her team. This didn’t work at all and was the disaster to end all disasters for Divas matches.

Post match Snoop lays out Santino with a clothesline and makes out with Maria. I’ll give him this: he seemed to be having a blast out there.

We recap Orton vs. HHH vs. Cena. Orton won the title by forfeit at No Mercy and Cena is back from injury to reclaim the title that he never lost. HHH won the Elimination Chamber to get a shot as well.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. HHH vs. John Cena

Cena has a drumline playing him to the ring which is pretty awesome. After some big match intros we’re ready to go. Orton immediately blasts HHH with the belt but Cena takes the champion down with a bulldog before Orton can do any more damage. HHH pops back up and throws both guys to the floor before sending Orton into the announce table. Orton and HHH head back in with the champion being put in a sleeper. Cena comes back in and picks them BOTH up at the same time for an FU but both guys slip off the back. Orton’s backbreaker puts HHH down as does a shot to Cena to give the champion control again.

Randy takes turns pounding away on both guys, getting two off a knee drop to the Game. Orton starts getting uncharacteristic for himself by going up top, only to be stopped by Cena. John loads up a superplex but HHH pulls Cena onto his own shoulders so Orton can hit a top rope cross body for two. Cena stands up to try the FU on Orton but Randy slides into a cradle for two. HHH clotheslines Cena down but Orton clotheslines HHH to put HHH down.

It’s Orton standing tall again as he sends both guys to the apron for a double Elevated DDT which gets two on both challengers. An RKO to Cena is countered but he shoves Orton into HHH to put both guys down. Cena hits the Throwback (a flipping face first mat slam) and the top rope Fameasser to keep Randy down. He isn’t down enough for the STFU though and the champion rolls to the floor. Cena follows him and is sent into the post to slow things down again.

Orton and HHH fight it out in the ring with HHH taking out the champion’s knee. Cena comes back in to distract HHH but after the Game puts him down, Orton catches him with an RKO to put him right next to Cena. Orton kicks HHH to the floor but walks into the STFU in the middle of the ring. HHH makes a save at the last second and sends Cena into the floor to put him down on the floor.

Back in and HHH puts on an Indian Deathlock to follow up on the knee work he started earlier. Now it’s Cena back in to break up the hold and send HHH into the corner and out to the floor. Back to the STFU but HHH comes in for the save. The problem is that the save didn’t work, so HHH puts Cena in a Crossface while Cena has Orton in the STFU. Cena lets go of his hold but manages to crawl over to the ropes to break up the hold.

Orton rolls to the floor so HHH and Cena can slug it out in the middle of the ring. The fans boo Cena’s punches and cheer HHH’s, continuing a trend for whomever Cena is facing. Cena slams HHH down and hits the Shuffle but Cena’s FU is countered into a Pedigree attempt which is countered into an STFU attempt this HHH escapes. The spinebuster puts John down and there’s the Pedigree, but Orton comes back in with the Punt to HHH to knock him silly and Orton pins Cena to retain.

Rating: B. This was a fast paced match with all three guys working hard out there in front of a huge crowd. The back and forth stuff worked very well and it wasn’t clear who was going to win until the match was over. Orton getting beaten up and winning while stealing HHH’s pin is perfect for him, as well as giving him the big win on the big stage that he needed.

We recap Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather which is the big celebrity match of the night. Big Show was a bully to the much smaller Mayweather at No Way Out where Floyd legitimately broke Show’s nose with a right hand, setting up tonight’s No DQ match. The big question was who do we cheer for in this match? The bully or the guy who keeps running his mouth and brags about how no one can beat him? That question was never answered even after the match was over. Mayweather allegedly got $20 million for this one match. He’s a world champion boxer if you’re not a fan of his.

Floyd Mayweather Jr. vs. Big Show

You can by pin, submission or knockout. Other than that anything goes. Floyd is in gloves which would seem to be a disadvantage for him but whatever. He bobs and weaves a lot before firing off some nice punches to Big Show. Mayweather stops for a drink from a chalice (seriously) and Show beats up Mayweather’s team a bit. Show grabs an incoming punch and tries to stomp on Floyd’s hand. Smart strategy.

Show lifts him up for a chokeslam but that lets Floyd get on even level with Show’s head. Some rights to the face stagger show but Mayweather tries to choke him out, which actually works for a bit. Show finally flips him over and steps on Floyd’s left hand. The guys on the floor FREAK and say that’s not allowed before Show chops Mayweather in the corner. Show stands on Floyd’s back before putting him down with a side slam.

A headbutt stops Floyd’s comeback bid and there’s an elbow drop for good measure. Mayweather tries to bail but Big Show chases the team down, beats them up, and throws Floyd back in the ring. Show loads up the chokeslam but a handler hits Show with a chair. He gets chokeslammed down but Mayweather gets the chair and blasts Show with it a few times. A low blow and three chair shots to the head sets up a brass knuckle right hand to Show’s jaw for the knockout (and Show was on his knees at 9).

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches where all you can say is “well what else were you expecting?” Again though, who was I supposed to cheer for? The giant bully, or the loud bragging guy who used chairs and brass knuckles to win? Like I said, the story was head scratch inducing, but this was tremendous fun.

Wrestlemania is coming back to Houston next year.

Kim Kardashian announces the new attendance record: 74,635.

We get a video on the Streak which is interrupted by Edge’s theme music. Edge already beat Undertaker once by cashing in MITB last year and then costing him the title at Survivor Series. They’re trying to play up Streak vs. streak here but Edge lost in MITB last year.

Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Edge

Edge has Teddy wheel out Vickie who is in a wheelchair as always. The Canadian is defending here. The champ pounds away to start but gets clotheslined out to the floor. Back in and Taker comes back with a Stunner onto the top rope to put Edge down. Taker slugs away but charges into a boot in the corner, only to come back with the jumping clothesline for two. Old School is countered but Taker rolls forward and armdrags Edge down.

Edge sends Taker over the corner by avoiding a big boot, possibly injuring Taker’s arm in the process. A spear sends Taker off the apron and into the barricade to work over the ribs a bit. Edge hits a hard baseball slide to send Taker back into the barricade as the match slows down a bit. With Undertaker on the apron, Edge hits a running neckbreaker to snap Undertaker’s neck across the top rope.

Back in and Edge pounds away even more before hitting a spear into the corner for no cover. Instead it’s a dropkick to put Taker down again and Edge goes up, only to be shoved down to the floor with a sick thud. There’s the Taker Dive to continue the Wrestlemania tradition. Taker drops the apron legdrop and heads back inside for the Last Ride but his back won’t let him use it.

They head outside again and Edge drops Taker back first onto the barricade, sending the big man into the crowd. Off to a half crab by Edge followed by a very modified Indian Deathlock which Undertaker kicks away. Back up and they slug it out with Taker getting control and the cheers from Undertaker. The challenger gets the better of it and hits a running clothesline in the corner. Make it a pair of them followed by snake eyes but the big boot is blocked for two by Edge.

The chokeslam is countered into the Impaler DDT for two. The second chokeslam attempt works but it only gets a near fall as well. Old School is broken up again and Edge pounds away in the corner but has to counter the Last Ride out of the corner with a neckbreaker for two. These counters are getting awesome. The Last Ride (more of a regular powerbomb here) hits but it only gets two. Edge counters the Tombstone into the Edge-O-Matic for ANOTHER close two. The fans aren’t buying Edge’s near falls.

Back up and Taker’s big boot hits the referee before Edge takes down the Dead Man. A low blow breaks up a chokeslam bid and Edge blasts Taker in the head with a camera. Taker sits up and like a dolt, Edge tries a Tombstone. Taker reverses into one of his own and here’s another referee running a LONG way down the aisle to count two. Cue Hawkins and Ryder (as in Curt and Zack, the Edgeheads) to distract Taker and let Edge hit the spear for two. NOW the fans are fired up about the kickout. Another spear connects but Taker grabs the Hell’s Gate submission out of nowhere and Edge taps away the title to make it 15-0.

Rating: A. I kept hearing about how great this match was and while I remember it being good, I don’t remember it being this good. It’s pretty safe to say that this is Edge’s best non-gimmick match ever and it’s one of his best ever period. Great match here and it would set up a series of solid gimmick matches between the two over the summer.

A lot of fireworks end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. There’s some very good stuff on here along with some historic stuff to go with it. The bad stuff is mostly short and the main event was very solid and better than I remember. I don’t know if I’d say it’s one of the best ever but it’s in the running for that list. Really fun show here which was better than I was expecting it to be.

Ratings Comparison

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Finlay

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Shelton Benjamin vs. CM Punk vs. Carlito vs. Chris Jericho vs. MVP vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. John Morrison

Original: B

Redo: B

Batista vs. Umaga

Original: F+

Redo: D-

Kane vs. Chavo Guerrero

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A

Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Melina vs. Maria/Ashley

Original: F

Redo: F+

John Cena vs. HHH vs. Randy Orton

Original: C+

Redo: B

Floyd Mayweather vs. Big Show

Original: D-

Redo: C+

Edge vs. Undertaker

Original: A-

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: A-

WOW I totally shortchanged this last time. It’s a great show and I said a C-? What was I on?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/31/583/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the NXT: The Full Sail Years Volumes I and II, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/03/24/kbs-history-of-nxt-volumes-1-and-2-now-available-in-paperback/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – October 21, 2002 (2017 Redo): Katie Vick

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 21, 2002
Location: Gaylord Entertainment Center, Knoxville, Tennessee
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re past No Mercy and the big story on the red side is the potential murder/necrophiliac did NOT win the World Title, meaning the Intercontinental Title has ceased to be. That means we’re in need of a fresh challenger and I’m terrified to think of what HHH is going to do to them. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last night’s title match.

Here are HHH and Ric Flair to get things going. HHH talks about everyone saying he didn’t deserve to be handed the title and he has one thing to say to them: SCREW YOU! He’s beaten everyone that’s gotten in the ring with him (in the full SIX WEEKS he’s been champion) and last night was just like another nail in Katie Vick’s coffin.

Kane isn’t here tonight because he probably doesn’t want to team with Rob Van Dam against the two of them. Or maybe there’s one other option…..and Flair pulls out a tape. HHH says it’s going to show whether or not Kane had sex with Vick before or after she was dead and no one will ever look at Kane again. Hurricane comes out and tries to steal the tape but gets beaten down.

Jeff Hardy vs. Christopher Nowinski

Hardy speeds things up to start and sends Chris to the floor for a sloppy flip dive (with his leg smacking Nowinski in the head). Back in and Jeff shrugs off some forearms to the back before getting two off a Thesz press of all things. The announcers bicker about the tape with JR saying “there’s no semen in wrestling”.

A side slam gives Nowinski two and a hot shot gets the same. Hardy gets in some right hands and the legdrop between the legs but the Swanton is broken up. Nowinski goes for a chair but here’s Al Snow to take it away. That allows Jeff to dropkick it into Chris’ face but Al pulls Nowinski out of the way of the Swanton, giving Chris the pin.

Rating: D-. Jeff is at a horrible point and Nowinski never was worth much in the first part. It doesn’t help that this match was almost as horrible as it possibly could have been as they were both missing almost every other move. I have no idea what’s up with Hardy lately but he’s getting more and more useless every time.

Eric Bischoff is watching a tape of his issues with Big Show when Stacy Keibler comes in. She wants to referee a match tonight so Bischoff says anything but the main event. Now it’s Show coming in so Bischoff gives him Rico and 3 Minute Warning in a handicap match.

Tommy Dreamer wants to know what’s up with Snow helping Nowinski. Snow says he’s just looking out for one of his kids but Dreamer wants revenge in a Singapore cane match. Nowinski comes up and says he doesn’t need Snow’s help.

William Regal/Lance Storm vs. Bubba Ray Dudley/Spike Dudley

The winners get a future Tag Team Title shot. Before the match, Storm says the Un-Americans are done but he and Regal share a mutual respect. Oh and America is horrible. Storm and Spike have a nice technical sequence to start with Storm looking stunned that Spike can keep up with him. It’s off to Bubba for a shoulder and neckbreaker and Regal takes a backdrop. Kane is shown arriving as Spike comes back in for his running forearms. Everything breaks down and Spike hurricanranas Lance out to the floor and the Dudley Dog puts Regal away.

Rating: D. The tag division is so worthless right now and it’s amazing to see how much it pales in comparison next to its Smackdown counterpart. Smackdown had a Match of the Year candidate last night and Raw can’t even give a nothing match four minutes as a team goes one a one match winning streak to become #1 contenders.

Regal and Storm beat up the Dudleyz with a superkick to Bubba’s head and some brass knuckles shots to Spike’s ribs.

Trish Stratus finishes up a photo shoot and says she doesn’t know what’s up with Victoria. Christian and Chris Jericho come up to awkwardly hit on her while bringing up the barking for Vince thing. It’s obvious that Trish wants an injection of Vitamin C. These two were great together and Trish’s disturbed face made it even better.

Here’s Eric Bischoff with an announcement to top Smackdown’s Cell match from last night. At Survivor Series, you will see the Elimination Chamber.

Batista and all of his muscles are still coming.

D’Lo Brown vs. Test

Stacy Keibler is guest referee and slaps Brown before the match. Test jumps him from behind and tries a full nelson slam but gets kicked away so Brown can shout a lot. A slam gets two on Test with Stacy doing the really slow slam. That’s quite a slam if it would have gotten the pin otherwise. The Sky High connects but Stacy stops to tie her shoe, allowing Test to get in the big boot for the normal pin.

Stacy jumps into Test’s arms. Lawler: “You ever see Earl Hebner do that?” JR: “Maybe one time with a large woman in Wisconsin.”

Victoria rants about how Trish is a liar but here’s Goldust to mock her in a Dusty voice. Booker joins him to help set up a six person tag tonight. Again: why in the world is this all Booker has to do? Booker calls her a sucka and Goldust gets in a little spank. Faces are now sexual harrassers.

Goldust/Booker T./Trish Stratus vs. Chris Jericho/Christian/Victoria

Trish goes after Victoria to start and an early Chick Kick gets two. Victoria sends her throat first into the bottom rope though and it’s off to Christian for some intimidation. That earns him a slap and Trish crawls through his legs for the hot tag to Booker as things speed up. A Victoria distraction lets Christian knock Booker outside and it’s time for the beatdown segment.

Back in and Jericho punches Booker in the head a few times but the spinning sunset flip puts Chris down for two. Christian’s dropkick sets up a top rope knee to Booker’s knee as Lawler says Trish wants Jericho. Booker gets in a spinebuster on Jericho and the hot tag brings in Goldust to clean house. A middle rope bulldog drops Jericho but Trish tags herself in for a high crossbody. Goldust kisses Victoria and Booker clotheslines Christian out to the floor. With no one else around, Jericho blasts Trish with a clothesline and grabs the Walls for the tap out.

Rating: D+. Well at least Booker didn’t do the job again, though I’m not sure how this helps anyone. I had forgotten that Victoria was even involved in the match until the ending, which she didn’t even play a part in. This really didn’t work and that’s not a good thing with two stories hitting a wall at the same time.

HHH delivers the tape to the production truck.

Terri is waiting outside Kane’s locker room in case this tape is horrible.

Here’s the tape. We’re in a funeral home and HHH is in a Kane shirt and mask. He goes up to the casket and talks to Katie (a mannequin). It’s her fault that she died because she wouldn’t give him what he wanted before they got in the car. He wants her now more than ever and sees no reason why they can’t be together.

Censored fondling ensues and HHH takes off his shirt. Katie’s clothes are removed too and HHH mounts the mannequin as we go to shots of the funeral home with various sexual noises in the background. Back to the casket with HHH appearing to be missing his clothes. He reaches down to her head and pulls up some goo. HHH: “I did it. I screwed your brains out!”

Normally I would give an explanation of why this didn’t work but this one speaks for itself. And yes, it’s actually worse than you remember.

Al Snow vs. Tommy Dreamer

This is a Singapore Cane match because, you know, because you can just go from the tape to this off a single commercial. They trade cane shots to start until Dreamer hits the post by mistake. The trapping headbutts stagger Tommy but Nowinski comes in and smacks Snow with a cane shot to give Dreamer the pin. This was nothing and I don’t think it cleared the Katie Vick stuff from the fans’ minds.

Rico/3 Minute Warning vs. Big Show

Show cleans house to start and the trio takes a breather on the floor. Back in and Show shrugs off a double clothesline before sending 3 Minute Warning to the floor. Triple teaming works a bit better but Show fights up, clears out Rico and Rosey and ends Jamal clean with a chokeslam in just over two minutes. So yeah, remember all those months of Jamal and Rosey being monsters? Forget all that because Big Show needed the win.

Post break, Big Show is traded to Smackdown. Again: what happened to the whole CONTRACTS ARE TOTALLY LOCKED IN NO MATTER WHAT?

Hurricane is standing next to a car, perhaps waiting on Kane.

Shawn Michaels is at the World and says he doesn’t hate anyone. He stands up from his wheelchair and he’s coming for HHH.

Ric Flair/HHH vs. Rob Van Dam/Kane

The good guys hammer away in the corner to start and a pair of kicks to the face have the villains in trouble. Rolling Thunder gets two on Flair and it’s off to the regular match. Actually scratch that as everything breaks down again with Van Dam kicking HHH a few times. Lawler calls the tape a public service and JR demands an explanation. As Jerry talks about how it was showing the world what REALLY happened, Flair sends Van Dam into the steps to really take over.

Kane breaks up a near fall as Lawler says HHH is really cerebral because he screwed Katie’s brains out. We hit the sleeper on Van Dam as Lawler is still on the necrophilia stuff. Flair goes up top and JR is making jokes about him as he’s only halfway up. Lawler: “It’s like Kane with Katie Vick! He just kept trying until he made it work!” Another kick puts HHH down but Flair offers a distraction so the referee doesn’t see the tag.

That’s the only good thing about the match so far, which isn’t a good sign seven minutes in. The hot tag is made a few seconds later and it’s Kane coming in off the top with the clothesline. Everything breaks down again and Flair low blows Van Dam, setting up a suplex for two. Kane has HHH up on the stage as Van Dam kicks Flair in the face and hits the Five Star for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was one of the least interesting matches I can remember in a long time and I can’t say I’m surprised. At the end of the day, there’s just no way to buy either of these two as a real threat to HHH because it’s clear he’s not laying down for either of them. If that’s the case, what’s the point to having a match like this? The commentary made things even worse as Lawler kept making necrophilia jokes and JR had to be incredulous

In the back, Kane knocks HHH into the trunk of the car Hurricane is next to. Kane promises to screw him, but the question is if HHH will be alive or dead. He drives away to end the show.

Overall Rating: F-. Nope. In every definition of the word possible, no. I can’t think of a single thing on this show that I liked, cared about, was interested in or want to see continue. This was one of the worst episodes the show has ever done with one of the worst segments in wrestling history. It wasn’t funny, it wasn’t intelligent, it wasn’t innovative and it had no business on this show. Other than someone higher up on the food chain thinking it was hilarious, I have no idea who decided it needed to be on the show. The rest of the show might not have been as bad but that’s not exactly a high bar to reach.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XX (2017 Redo): The Definitive One

Wrestlemania XX
Date: March 14, 2004
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is an interesting choice but when I asked which show you wanted redone, I got a nine way tie at one vote apiece so I picked it myself. If there’s one thing WWE knows how to do, it’s some big old anniversary show. This is a major milestone for Wrestlemania and it should be a fun sit. Let’s get to it.

Runtime for this thing: four hours and thirty one minutes. Somehow, that’s short by today’s standards.

The Harlem Boys Choir sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video looks at the history of the show, which started as a dream twenty years ago. Most of the people on the show talk about how important this show is and how important it is to be in the Garden. This is the kind of video that makes it feel special, which can be so easy to get wrong at a show like this one. In a VERY cool ending, the video ends with a shot of Vince and zooms out to show Shane and his daughter as the voiceover talks about it all beginning again. That’s just awesome.

It’s still so weird to see King in a suit.

Since it’s MSG, there’s a video screen opposite the hard camera. It’s not the entrance but at least it looks cool.

US Title: John Cena vs. Big Show

Show is defending for the third or so time since winning the title FIVE MONTHS AGO. Cena gets the fans fired up and we get a LOUD Cena chant. How weird is it to not have “SUCKS” after that? We get some genital jokes, fat jokes and Cena gets a BIG SHOW SUCKS chant started before it’s finally ready to go. Of course it’s the trash talk to start until Show sends him to the ribs and gets in a knee lift.

Cole starts talking about Show’s history in Madison Square Garden and says “he retired Hulk Hogan here.” I have less than no idea what he’s talking about there so I’m going to assume it’s just an error. Show gets two off a powerslam and cuts off a Cena comeback with a clothesline. A good looking suplex gets two and a headbutt allows Cole to get in his “it’s like getting hit with a typewriter” line.

The same headbutt he gave to Hogan in the Garden right? Another comeback is stopped cold with a superkick and the Hog Roll (imagine a Fameasser if Cena is face up) gets two. The fans get behind Cena again but it’s off to a cobra clutch so Cole can get in a Sgt. Slaughter reference.

Cena FINALLY gets in some offense with right hands and we get the really weird description of Cena as a young kid. The FU gets two and Cena gives a meme worthy reaction. Cena puts his chain around his head but gets caught by the referee. John’s response? YOU CAN’T SEE ME. The referee takes them away so Cena hits him with the knuckles, followed by another FU for the pin and the title at 9:13.

Rating: D. This is a case where the fans wanted to see one thing and that’s all that mattered to them. The match was horrible of course because Big Show was one of the most worthless periods here but they got the ending right and the fans LOVED Cena here. I also like the FU better than the AA as it looks more impactful, but I can get why he switched it up. Show needs to move on to anything else.

Cena gets a big celebration for his first title.

Coach runs into the bizarre duo of Dr. Tom Prichard and Johnny Stamboli. After that completely bizarre cameo, he goes to see Raw GM Eric Bischoff who sends him to find the Undertaker. Coach asks why he’s supposed to go find a Smackdown wrestler but Eric sends him away anyway.

Evolution is in a stairwell (where Randy Orton attacked Mick Foley in June to really start their feud) and says it all begins again here. Orton laughs at Foley for walking away in December and now he’s run off to Hollywood to get his buddy the Rock to help him out. (that night when Rock was already there was the moment that made this story for me).

Anyway, Evolution beat Rock down too and they’re doing it again here. It’s Evolution’s time and tonight it all ends where it began last June. REALLY good stuff here as Orton continues to be way more effective as the young, brash hotshot than he would become as the Viper. I know I’m mostly alone in that stance but I was a big Orton fan at this point.

Raw Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Booker T./Rob Van Dam

Booker and Van Dam are defending and this is one fall to a finish. And yes, they really thought calling someone Garrison Cade (just a generic guy who got better later on) was going to get him over. Jindrak is an athletic freak who became a bigger deal in Mexico and La Resistance are Rob Conway and Rene Dupree. Unfortunately this match means we have to hear the AWFUL Booker T./Rob Van Dam remixed theme. Seriously.

Dupree takes Van Dam into the corner to start and gets monkey flipped for his efforts. Van Dam catapults him into a superkick from Booker as they’re trying to get as many people in as fast as they can. Bubba comes in for the first time and it’s a much, much lower level reaction than you would expect for a New Yorker coming in. You know, assuming there isn’t a Harlem Heat fan in the house.

Bubba loads up the Flip Flop and Fly but eats a side kick for his efforts in a smart move. Jindrak tags himself in and it’s time to double team Booker for a bit. It really is just a bit though as Dupree tags himself in as well, meaning La Resistance gets to work Booker over for a change.

It’s off to a double arm crank as the match is far slower than you would expect a match with eight people to be. Booker busts Conway’s spine though and the hot tag brings in Van Dam to clean house. Now everything breaks down as it’s supposed to until Booker and D-Von are left along to slug it out. Cade breaks up 3D and Booker adds some kicks, setting up the Five Star to retain the titles at 7:53.

Rating: D. Too many people in a match that should have been on Raw. Other than “because we feel like it” was there a reason for Cade and Jindrak to be on there? WWE has a real issue with adding people to a match when they don’t make things any better, which is what happened in this case. You really could have dropped La Resistance as well and just given us a regular tag but I get that this helps the guys a lot more financially and it’s not like this match meant anything.

Coach goes to investigate some noises in the bowels of the building and finds…..Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan in various stages of undress. The reaction is of course priceless (Heenan: “We were playing cards!”) but Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young pop out and drag Heenan and Okerlund back inside. Heenan: “I DON’T WANT TO GO BACK! I HAVEN’T BEEN WELL!” Coach looks terrified (rightfully so) and that’s it for the “go find the Undertaker” thing.

We recap Christian vs. Chris Jericho, which I’ve always liked quite a bit. Jericho and Christian had a bet over who could sleep with Trish Stratus and Lita respectfully. Lita was quickly forgotten but it turned out that Jericho started to fall for Trish. However, Christian wasn’t happy with his buddy becoming a new person.

Bischoff was annoyed one night and made Christian vs. Trish with Christian agreeing to lay down for her….if she would lay down for him. Trish said no so he put her in the Walls of Jericho. Chris, who seems to have gotten onto Trish’s good side, is fighting for revenge. It’s a complicated story but they both had logical paths and Jericho’s character grew a lot out of the whole thing.

Chris Jericho vs. Christian

Jericho starts fast and gets rather aggressive on the mat. A belly to back suplex drops Christian as Lawler is cheering for the evil Canadian. Christian gets backdropped to the floor in a big crash and you know the New York crowd is going to be behind Jericho here. Back in and the threat of the Walls send Christian into the ropes.

A nasty looking belly to back throw send Jericho outside and Christian takes over for the first time. It’s off to a neck crank (with their backs to the camera because they don’t know how to work or something) before they ram heads for a double knockdown. Lawler says that this split is a shame because they were both having more success than they had ever achieved before. I’m not even going to bother to make fun of that one.

Tim White tells them that they have “six minutes fellows” so Jericho gets two off a northern lights suplex. The Lionsault hits knees though and Christian gets two off his reverse tornado DDT. Christian starts in on the knee and slaps on a Texas Cloverleaf to mix it up a bit.

Jericho gets out though and hooks the Walls on the floor, which of course doesn’t mean anything or enhance the move at all. Instead it’s a butterfly superplex for a near fall and here comes Trish. Back up and Christian gets two off an implant DDT but stops to go after Trish. Jericho comes over for the save but gets slapped by mistake, allowing Christian to grab a rollup with tights for the pin at 14:43.

Rating: B-. The match wasn’t great but it’s certainly the best thing on the show tonight so far. I’m a big fan of this story and it’s certainly one of my favorites from this era. It told a logical story with different steps and gave both of them something to do for several months. The match itself is good too and gives Christian his biggest singles win ever.

Post match Trish slaps Jericho on purpose so Christian can lay him out. Trish and Christian leave together and kiss on the stage, giving us the eternally awesome evil Trish, who worked in a variety of ways.

Mick Foley is fired up to be here but doesn’t know if he can channel enough emotion and hatred to face Evolution tonight. The Rock cuts him off though (BIG pop for that) and says Foley has come back….home. After hitting on Lillian a big (with good reason), Rock steals the camera and finds Hurricane, Rosey, Jimmy Snuka, Don Muraco and of course, the people, as Rock sends the cameraman into the arena before coming back for the final catchphrase.

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

3-2 here with Orton (Intercontinental Champion)/Batista/Ric Flair for the team. The question here is can MSG handle Rock and Flair trying to steal the show so hard in the same match. Foley is looking slim here and the amazing thing for me is that he’s only 39 here and having his first match in four years. He was done as a full time wrestler at 35 and I’m kind of amazed he lasted that long given how insane he was for so many years.

Evolution gets cleaned out to start until Flair and Rock get things going (oh boy). The early backdrop sends Flair to the floor but it’s a simple thumb to the eye to cut Rock off. Foley is right there though and drops the elbow off the apron as the FOLEY chants start up. It’s off to Orton but he immediately bails to avoid Foley. That goes as well as you would expect and something that might have been a low blow puts Randy down.

Rock gets in some shots as we’re still in the first section of the match. Batista low bridges Rock to the outside though and it’s time for the first heat segment. It’s off to Flair for one heck of a chop and some extra strength WOO’s. The pop for the strut is as loud as you would expect, as it is for the clothesline that Rock follows up with. Ric goes up, gets slammed down, and tags off to Batista.

Mick is in as well though and things speed up (not normally something you associate with Foley) until Batista drives him into the corner (which you do associate with Batista). A huge clothesline runs Foley over though and Orton whips him HARD into the steps. Back in and Orton grabs a camel clutch for a bit before the rest of the team gets in their shots. Foley does get a quickly broken up Claw on Batista for a hope spot, which is a great way to keep the crowd into things.

A swinging neckbreaker and a forearm to Flair’s head is enough for the tag, which doesn’t get the pop you would expect. Rock cleans house and the fans are into his offense until Batista gets in the spinebuster. Then, in the spot of the match, Flair loads up the People’s Elbow. Naturally Rock nips up, does the strut, and punches Flair in the jaw before showing him how it’s really done.

The fans buy into the near fall and do it again after a Rock Bottom to Orton. Batista’s big clothesline and the Batista Bomb get two on Rock but Orton gives up the hot tag to Foley and eats a double arm DDT. It’s Mr. Socko time but Foley walks into a quick RKO for the pin at 17:02. Notice that Foley was up a few seconds later and looked stunned, just like Orton. That makes Orton look like he won clean but also that he’s moving up a level because it worked on the biggest name yet.

Rating: B+. I had a great time with this as it was an exceptional performance, albeit not exactly a great match. This was all about everyone looking great with Rock and Flair clearly having the time of their lives out there. Foley vs. Orton was the real story here and things would get even better the next month when they were on their own. This was a big part of making Orton though, which is where Foley shined like few others over the years. Great stuff here and a fine example of what happens when you have some amazing performers wanting to do their best.

Foley gets up and looks dejected but Rock applauds him.

Clips from the Hall of Fame ceremony, which hadn’t been held since 1996. Heenan’s line of “I wish Monsoon was here” gets me every time.

Gene Okerlund presents the Hall of Fame Class of 2004:

Bobby Heenan (I can’t praise him enough)

Tito Santana (one of my all time favorites)

Big John Studd (represented by his son)

Harley Race (that man deserves his own Hall of fame)

Pete Rose (booed but said to be incredibly grateful for the honor)

Don Muraco (underrated)

Greg Valentine (big pop and looks the same as he did in 1983)

Junkyard Dog (represented by his daughter)

Billy Graham (probably the most copied wrestler of his era)

Sgt. Slaughter (the definition of a wrestling character)

Jesse Ventura (BIG pop and well deserved)

Sable/Torrie Wilson vs. Stacy Keibler/Miss Jackie

Playboy Evening Gown match (and Smackdown vs. Raw) after Sable and Torrie posed together. They want to have the match in lingerie but Jackie says no so this actually has to take place. Jackie is stripped anyway so all four are in their underwear. I think you know how this is going to go and they hit all of the comedy spots that you would expect. That includes high crossbodies, Stacy doing the leg choke in the corner, sunset flips and the referee getting crushed. Oh and genital jokes from Cole and Tazz. Torrie rolls Jackie up for the pin at 2:32. This was exactly what four non-wrestlers in lingerie was going to be.

Video on international fans coming in for Wrestlemania.

Eddie Guerrero goes in to see Chris Benoit and says he’s proud of Benoit no matter what. Benoit doesn’t want to hear it but Eddie keeps going until Chris gets in his face and shouts that he believes in himself. That’s exactly what Eddie wanted to hear. That’s the Benoit he fought in Japan every night and we get that Eddie smile. Tonight, they’re leaving here with both World Titles.

Cruiserweight Title: Cruiserweight Open

Chavo Guerrero Jr. is defending and this is basically Tag Team Turmoil but with one person at a time. Guerrero is automatically tenth due to being champion and the rest are all randomly chosen. In an interesting move, all ten come out first with Ultimo Dragon tripping on the way in for a funny moment.

Ultimo Dragon (who slips on the stage and on the ropes, both of which are edited off the Network version) and Shannon Moore get things going with an exchange of near falls. Shannon hits a moonsault press off the top for two but gets caught in the Asai DDT (starts in a snapmare but Dragon backflips into a reverse DDT) for the pin at 1:19. Jamie Noble is in next for a forearm to Dragon’s back and a neckbreaker for no cover. A guillotine choke gets rid of Dragon at 2:15 total. Funaki comes in with a high crossbody but gets small packaged for the elimination at 2:21.

It’s Nunzio (stereotypical Italian) in fifth so Noble sends him outside for a top rope flip dive. That’s actually good for a countout at 4:15 and Kidman is in next. Nunzio isn’t done though and pulls Noble to the floor for a springboard shooting star press in the spot of the night so far. Back in and Nunzio grabs another guillotine choke on Kidman, only to get reversed with a backdrop and an enziguri. Noble crotches him on top and tries a superplex but gets caught in a super BK Bomb (Sky High) to get rid of Noble at 6:06.

Rey Mysterio (as the Flash in a great costume) is in next but walks into a quick dropkick. Mysterio gets in one of his own, only to have Akio (Jimmy Wang Yang as Tajiri’s goon) deck him from behind. The BK Bomb gets two so Kidman takes him to the corner but gets caught in a sunset bomb for the pin at 7:26. It’s Tajiri’s turn now and Rey jumps over his head, only to get caught in the Tarantula. The handspring elbow is blocked with a dropkick and there’s the 619. Akio offers a distraction but takes the Mist by mistake, allowing Rey to grab a rollup for the pin at 8:36.

Akio can’t go because of the Mist so Chavo goes in for the title match against Mysterio. Rey starts springboarding around but Chavo Sr. offers a distraction and gets knocked to the floor for his efforts. The referee can’t block a dive but Chavo Jr. grabs a rollup and his dad’s hands for the pin to retain at 10:30.

Rating: D. WAY too much going on here and I have almost no idea what happened for most of the match. They were flying all over the place and going in and out so fast that it didn’t register at all. My biggest problem with this kind of match is always the same: if someone can get a pin like this in a minute and a half, why does that never happen on a weekly basis?

We recap Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar. They got into it at the Royal Rumble with Lesnar interfering and throwing Goldberg out. Goldberg then cost Lesnar the Smackdown World Title at No Way Out and a match was made. Steve Austin was added as guest referee to make sure this wasn’t a complete disaster and had a mini-feud with Lesnar as well.

However, there was one more detail: prior to the show, it leaked out that both guys were leaving after this show, meaning there was almost no point to the whole thing. As you might have guessed, the New York crowd has figured out what’s going on and I have a feeling they might have something to say about it.

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

No contact for the first twenty five seconds so we hit the YOU SOLD OUT chants. Austin tells them to get it on as we hit a minute with no contact. Now it’s the Goodbye Song as JR talks about Lesnar going to the NFL because you just can’t ignore the chants any longer. Two minutes in and nothing but circling and trash talk so far. Austin has a knowing look on his face as the fans chant BS, which JR says is an Austin chant (they do sound a lot alike).

They FINALLY lock up at 2:46 as we hear about Goldberg being an MMA aficionado. The lockup lasts 45 seconds before they shove each other away and have another staredown. We’re four minutes in and the only contact has been a single lockup. Another lockup goes on and the booing is strong with this one. This one doesn’t last nearly as long but still goes nowhere.

The fans think this match sucks as Lesnar FINALLY grabs a headlock five minutes in. They collide off a shoulder and stare each other down AGAIN, earning a “WE WANT FLAIR” chant. A double shoulder puts both guys down again and the fans are still livid. Goldberg finally grabs him by the throat into a gorilla press into a spinebuster, drawing an actual pop from the crowd.

The spear misses though and Goldberg crashes out to the floor so the fans think he sucks. Back in and Lesnar gets two off a suplex before grabbing a standing choke to keep things slow. Something happens in the crowd and they start chanting for Hogan (probably a look-a-like). Brock gets in another suplex and puts on another choke as the fans have just given up on even trying.

Another double collision puts both guys down again as this is somehow eleven minutes already. Goldberg makes his comeback with clotheslines and a neckbreaker followed by the spear for two. The F5 gets the same and Lesnar stops to jaw with Austin, setting up the spear and Jackhammer to end Brock at 13:43.

Rating: S. For sequel, which this would somehow warrant. This was the epitome of disrespectful to the fans as they didn’t want to do anything for the people here because they knew they were getting paid no matter what. There’s no point in trying to analyze the match because neither was interested in doing anything.

It got watchable near the end but they had already given up and taken the crowd completely out of it by that point. I was embarrassed here and that should never happen. Austin was completely innocent here by the way and was stuck in a hard place. Oh and one more thing: WWE IS GOING TO LET THEM DO IT AGAIN THIRTEEN YEARS LATER! FOR THE TITLE!

Fireworks go off outside.

Vince McMahon himself comes out to say that tonight, it all begins again. We actually get what sounds like a very heartfelt thank you from the boss, who thanks us on behalf of himself, his company and his family. No storyline or sarcasm here and that’s a really cool thing to see.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Rikishi/Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Basham Brothers vs. APA vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

Rikishi and Scotty are defending and it’s one fall to a finish again. The Bashams were talented guys who looked alike but never had the chance to go anywhere. Bradshaw (ready to break into his singles run) and Shelton get things going before the Bashams pull Benjamin into the corner. That’s fine with Shelton though as he takes over on Doug and slams him onto Charlie’s knee. It’s off to Scotty for a suplex on Haas but let’s stop to dance for a bit.

Haas and Benjamin get in some double teaming to work on Scotty’s back before it’s off to the Bashams for the same. Scotty finally flips out of a suplex and brings in Rikishi as the crowd just does not care. Shelton makes the mistake of trying a German suplex on Rikshi, who responds by superkicking Haas into the corner for the Stinkface. Bradshaw gets to clean house but Rikishi grabs him in a Samoan drop. A sitdown splash ends Danny to retain the titles at 6:02.

Rating: D-. No one gets to shine, the teams are almost all nothing and the crowd just did not react. It’s a horrible idea for a match but again, I get why they do it this way. The APA would split almost immediately after this and the Bashams would join JBL’s Cabinet later in the year. Nothing match though as this show is just going on way too long.

The champs dance post match.

Edge is coming back after over a year on the shelf.

Jesse Ventura comes out to interview…..dang it he’s interviewing Donald Trump. Short version: Trump and Vince are friends and Trump would support Jesse going after the Presidency. Lawler thinks they would make a good ticket. Moving on to ANYTHING else.

Women’s Title: Molly Holly vs. Victoria

Victoria is defending and this is title vs. hair with both women looking great here. Molly starts in on the arm but gets rolled up for an early two, freaking her her out at the thought of being bald. A quick trip to the floor seems to get Molly back into the swing of things as she drops some elbows to the back for two. We hit a cravate for a bit and it’s time to discuss underwear because JR and King are on commentary. Victoria fights up and grabs a powerslam but gets caught in a sunset powerbomb out of the corner. For some reason Molly tries Victoria’s Widow’s Peak but gets reversed into a backslide for the pin at 4:55.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad while it lasted and a rare bright spot for a dark time in the women’s division. They did what they could in five minutes and there was definitely a fire here as both of them wanted to show that they wanted to be here. According to Holly, the hair stipulation was the only way they could get on the show and they immediately jumped at the offer. I’ve always admired that and they gave it all they had.

Molly tries to run and even gets Victoria in the barber’s chair, only to take hairspray to the face and get strapped in for the big shave.

We recap Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero. Eddie won the title at No Way Out but was attacked by Angle, who didn’t think that a former drug addict should have been representing WWE. Guerrero eventually got himself into a match with Paul Heyman where his hands were tied behind his back and I’m sure you know what happened. Angle beat the heck out of him and the match was set up over the culture clash and Angle telling the people that it was for their own good. Either way this should be outstanding and there’s almost no way it could be anything else.

The haircut is STILL going after that package and Molly really is bald.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero

Eddie is defending and comes out in a Cadillac truck. Feeling out process to start and the first technical battle gives us a standoff and earns both guys a round of applause. They hit the mat again and it’s a LET’S GO ANGLE/ANGLE SUCKS chant. Eddie scores with some shoulders and Angle needs a breather on the floor.

Back in and Angle easily takes him down to the mat and grabs a front facelock to keeps things slow. It’s off to an abdominal stretch as the technical display continues. Angle gets tired of the slow pace though and rolls some German suplexes before trying the big one off the apron. Naturally that doesn’t work as it could cause a bad case of death so Eddie sends him outside, only to miss a top rope dive into the barricade.

That bangs the ribs up even worse and we’ve got a story. Back in and we hit a bodyscissors because Angle is smart enough to know what he’s doing. If that’s not your cup of tea, Angle snaps off two belly to belly suplexes before going to a waistlock (notice that it’s a different move to avoid being repetitive. Eddie goes to the eyes to escape but it’s another belly to belly for two.

Angle puts him on top and tries to run the corner, only to get shoved down in a crash. It’s too early for the Frog Splash though and Eddie hits the ribs again. Some right hands have Eddie rocked but he wants some more. That just earns him more German suplexes but he reverses the second into a rollup for two.

The Angle Slam is countered and Eddie rolls out of the ankle lock for good measure. A dropkick looks to set up the Frog Splash again but this time the running belly to belly superplex connects for a near fall. There go the straps and it’s back to the ankle lock in the middle of the ring. Eddie rolls out again so Angle German suplexes him again to teach him a lesson.

Another Angle Slam attempt is countered into a good looking DDT and NOW the Frog Splash connects for two, stunning the crowd who bought the false finish. Angle goes for the ankle again but Eddie sends him outside and starts untying his own boot. Kurt comes back in and gets the ankle lock again, only to pull Eddie’s boot off. The livid Angle charges right into a small package to retain the title at 21:34.

Rating: A. I loved this match and you could see a great story going all the way throughout the whole thing. Eddie was in over his head against the incredibly talented Angle but he hung in there long enough to frustrate Angle into making a big mistake at the end. This was Eddie at his best as he was just so easy to support with the athleticism to back things up. Angle was getting into his Wrestling Machine mode here and that’s something that almost no one else could ever do. Just a great match here, which is exactly what this show needed.

We recap Kane vs. the Undertaker. Kane had buried his brother alive (again) but Undertaker’s gong sounded at the Royal Rumble and it was clear that he was coming for revenge. This is a way to get rid of Biker Taker and bring back the Deadman, meaning Kane is little more than a sacrificial lamb and everyone knows it.

Undertaker vs. Kane

Kane’s entrance is really cool as the city set entrance appears to be on fire. Then the lights go out and Paul Bear says OH YES. That means druids and the tunnel of fire before Undertaker makes his first appearance since Survivor Series. Undertaker debuts the cowboy hat here and has the weird just slightly longer hair for a look that really doesn’t work. Kane looks terrified and keeps shouting that Undertaker isn’t real.

A bunch of right hands have Kane in trouble and the head outside with Undertaker beating on him even more. Back in and the Last Ride is countered into a backdrop but Kane is WAY too far from the ropes so Undertaker has to awkwardly grab them and fall instead of going over to the floor. Undertaker hammers away on the mat but Kane avoids a charge and gets two off the top rope clothesline. Old School doesn’t work and Kane plants him with the chokeslam for no cover. He takes too long shouting at Bearer though and there’s the sit-up. Undertaker comes back with the usual and grabs the Tombstone for the pin at 7:46.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here after the entrance but it’s nice to have the old Undertaker back for a change. The Biker Taker stuff had LONG since run its course here so having him basically squash Kane was as good of a way as any to reestablish himself. There was no drama here though but that would have missed the point entirely.

We recap the main event. HHH and Shawn Michaels went to a draw in a last man standing match at the Royal Rumble so HHH retained the Raw World Title. Chris Benoit won the Royal Rumble later in the night and jumped to Raw to challenge HHH. Michaels wasn’t cool with that and attacked Benoit during his contract signing and signed his own name. You know, because the world was waiting for HHH vs. Shawn at Wrestlemania and contracts just happen to work that way.

Michaels was a total jerk here and I don’t think many people saw him as having a point but you know HHH isn’t laying down clean in the middle of the ring for someone Benoit’s size so this is as good as we’re going to get. The match gets the music video treatment as the main event of Wrestlemania should.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Benoit

HHH is defending and has the rare white boots. JR says this is Shawn’s sixth Wrestlemania main event. By my count it’s third and he would only wind up with five in his career. Assuming they’re doing that nonsense where there are multiple main events, but even then you have the title match at XI, the actual main events at XII, XIV and this one. Unless they’re counting the ladder match (it’s the most famous match but not the main event) or the Jericho match last year (give me a break), JR is just babbling again.

HHH is knocked to the floor to start, leaving the challengers to chop it out and hit the mat for some technical stuff. The champ comes back in and knees Shawn in the head for two before knocking Benoit back to the floor. That’s fine with Michaels who moonsaults onto both of them and all three are down on the outside. You can tell the fans are smart enough to realize that they’ve got a lot to go through to get to the end here and they’re not going to freak out over something this early. Or they’re spent after a four hour show.

Back in and Benoit breaks up a Pedigree attempt on Shawn (in case you thought it was on the referee) before sending Shawn shoulder first into the post. HHH gets back up and puts Benoit in the Tree of Woe so he can whip Shawn into him. Shawn comes right back with his forearm on HHH but Benoit knocks him to the floor. It’s time to roll some German suplexes on HHH as they’re doing a great job of keeping the pace up so far.

HHH ducks Sweet Chin Music and DDTs Shawn out to the floor. The champ isn’t done yet and superplexes Benoit down for two. Make that eight actually, though you would think the first near fall would teach him his lesson and make the other three unnecessary. Shawn dives back in to break up a quick Crossface attempt and gets LOUDLY booed for trying a German suplex on Benoit.

Chris’ version works a bit better and the Swan Dive gets two. Benoit is sent outside again so it’s Shawn vs. HHH, which was probably lobbied for at some point. Shawn drops the top rope elbow for two and Sweet Chin Music gets the same with Benoit making a save. We get our first blood as Benoit catapults Shawn into the post before slapping on the Crossface. Shawn raises his hand to tap but HHH grabs his hand to keep it from hitting the mat in a smart idea.

They’re fifteen minutes into this and they’ve been knocking it out of the park so far. They just have not stopped and it’s been great stuff. Benoit is sent into the steps as Shawn is barely moving in the ring. The first table isn’t enough though as Benoit fights up and tries a German suplex on the Spanish announcers’ table. Shawn comes back though and a double suplex/slam sends Benoit through the table for the big spot of the match.

That leaves the bloody Shawn to call HHH back inside for the showdown. In a bit of a confusing moment (could be the blood loss), Shawn sends HHH right back to the floor where the champ lands on a cameraman for a cool visual. Now HHH is busted as well but he’s still able to grab a Pedigree and put both guys down. A very delayed cover is broken up by a diving Benoit, who follows it up with a Sharpshooter on the champ.

You don’t leave your head that wide open in a Shawn match though and a superkick takes Benoit’s head off. That’s only good for two though and the crowd is losing it on each of these near falls. You can hear JR’s voice going too and it’s making things even better. The superkick misses and Benoit backdrops Shawn to the floor, followed by countering the Pedigree into the Crossface. HHH rolls away but winds up back in the middle of the ring and the tap makes Benoit champion at 24:47.

Rating: A+. Oh of course it’s perfect. This was one of the best triple threats of all time as they did not stop for twenty five minutes with all three having some very close falls. That superkick to break up the Sharpshooter was incredible and I actually bought it for a split second despite having seen this match so many times. Benoit making HHH tap in the middle of the ring was the only way to end this and it was a great way to end an outstanding match. If you somehow haven’t seen this, go out of your way to see it because it’s still one of the most exciting three ways ever.

In the real moment of the show, Eddie Guerrero comes out to celebrate with Benoit in the big emotional ending as the confetti falls. This is really, really hard to watch now and makes the show that much more emotional.

A four minute highlight package takes us out.

Overall Rating: B. This is a VERY, VERY hard one to grade as the top stuff is staggeringly amazing but the rest of the show is full of horrible matches with an almost unforgiveable five at a D or worse. What really helps them though is that only one of them is over ten minutes long, meaning there’s way more good than bad and you can throw in the Jericho vs. Christian match as another very solid effort.

This is the kind of show that was DYING for a pre-show to burn off two or three of the matches that no one cared about (Tag Team Title matches and the Cruiserweight Open would be great candidates) and let the rest of the show not feel so long. The show itself needed to be about three to three and a half hours long max instead of the four hours and thirty one minutes it clocks in at instead.

That being said though, good night the top matches on here are amazing. What does it say when the fourth best match on the show is a really strong Jericho vs. Christian match? The two World Title matches are classics and the handicap match is really good stuff as well. Cut this show down by an hour and it’s one of the best of all time. As it is, it’s a long show that drags in spots but blows the doors off at other times.

Ratings Comparison

John Cena vs. Big Show

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C

2017 Redo: D

Booker T./Rob Van Dam vs. La Resistance vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jidrak vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B-

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

Original: A

2013 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B+

Torrie Wilson/Sable vs. Miss Jackie/Stacy Keibler

Original: F

2013 Redo: N/A

2017 Redo: N/A

Cruiserweight Open

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Original: F

2013 Redo: E

2017 Redo: S (for SEQUEL)

Rikishi/Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Basham Brothers vs. APA vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D-

Molly Holly vs. Victoria

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C-

Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A

2013 Redo: A

2017 Redo: A

Kane vs. Undertaker

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH vs. Chris Benoit

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

Oh I think we have the definitive rating here.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/27/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-20-where-it-all-begins-again-with-two-dead-guys/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/29/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xx-nearly-a-masterpiece/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XIV: McMahons, McMahons Everywhere

Wrestlemania XVI
Date: April 2, 2000
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 18,034
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

This is also called Wrestlemania 2000 but the purist in me won’t let that happen. This is a step up over last year’s one match show as this year we have a two match show. The main event is a fatal fourway elimination match between HHH, the Rock, Big Show and the one night only returning Mick Foley. The other match is Angle vs. Benoit vs. Jericho in a two fall double title match. You might notice a few multi-man matches there and you’re going to notice a lot of them tonight. There isn’t a single one on one match on the entire card tonight, which might be the only time ever in company history. Let’s get to it.

Lillian Garcia sings the national anthem. I’ve heard her do this live and my goodness can she sing the heck out of that song.

We open with a recap of the previous 15 Wrestlemanias which sounds like it’s narrated by a James Earl Jones impersonator.

Godfather/D’Lo Brown vs. Big Boss Man/Bull Buchanan

Ice-T raps Godfather and Brown to the ring. Apparently it’s pimp or die, which I think might be taking it a bit too far. Buchanan and Brown get things going to prevent us from having a future RTC matchup. D’Lo tries a quick O’Connor Roll but only gets two. Boss Man tries to come in but gets run over by Godfather. Off to Godfather for a clothesline and the spinning legdrop but an elbow misses.

Godfather gets beaten on for a bit but comes back with a hook kick for two. Back to Brown who is almost immediately caught by Buchanan for even more pain. D’Lo pounds on Buchanan in the corner as this is going nowhere so far. Of all people, Bull gets things moving a bit better by climbing the corner for a spinning clothesline. Bull puts him in 619 position and both heels slide under the ropes for a double uppercut.

A clothesline gets two more for Bull and everything breaks down for a few seconds. That goes nowhere so we go back to Buchanan pounding on Brown in the corner. Now we keep the excitement going with a bearhug. Boss Man comes in for some double teaming and does his best to get the fans to care at all.

Brown’s cross body is caught in a backbreaker for two from both guys but as Buchanan goes up, Godfather crotches him down. Brown comes back with a nice top rope rana to put Buchanan down on the mat, allowing for the hot tag to Godfather. House is cleaned and there’s the Ho Train to Boss Man. Bull breaks up the Low Down though, allowing the Boss Man Slam to set up a guillotine legdrop on D’Lo for the pin.

Rating: D+. Who in the world thought this was the right idea for an opening match? They were WAY off base with each other here and the match suffered a lot as a result. This didn’t work on almost any level and on top of all that, the popular team loses. The whole point of an opening is to fire up a crowd, so having one of the most over acts in the company lose was a dumb way to start things off. Just a bad match all around.

HHH and Stephanie talk about how awesome their titles are. She’s Women’s Champion if that wasn’t really clear.

We see a conference with the Hardcore Battle Royal participants. Basically it’s a huge free for all and not a traditional battle royal. There’s a fifteen minute time limit and there can be as many title changes as there needs to be. Basically whoever is the last man standing is champion and the 24/7 rule stops after the last fall.

Hardcore Title: Hardcore Battle Royal

Tazz, Crash Holly, Hardcore Holly, Viscera, Joey Abs, Rodney, Pete Gas, Taka Michinoku, Funaki, Thrasher, Mosh, Faarooq, Bradshaw

Crash is defending coming in. He comes in last and we’re ready to go. Remember there’s a fifteen minute time limit. Everyone else fights to the floor and Taz hits a fast suplex on Crash for the pin ad the title in thirty seconds. So now, only Taz can be pinned for the title. A few seconds later, Viscera hits Tazz with a board and gets the title. Now we move into an extended period of hitting people in the head with whatever objects are handy.

We’ve got thirteen and a half minutes or so to go. Someone uses a box fan on someone else and that’s about the most in depth coverage you’ll be getting here. Everyone jumps Viscera and hits him with whatever they can find. Crash appears to be busted open. The Acolytes double team the champion and the beatings continue on everyone for a bit. Hardcore and Mosh beat Viscera down and get two each.

We’re under ten minutes now and it’s fine extinguisher time. There’s so much stuff going on it’s impossible to call. Viscera heads back into the ring and goes up top (for those of you unfamiliar, Viscera is about Big Show’s size), only to be slammed down by the Acolytes. The APA (Acolyte Protection Agency, same team) breaks a board over his back and Bradshaw hits a top rope shoulder to put him down. For no apparent reason they throw Kai En Tai on top of Viscera, giving Funaki the belt.

Funaki, apparently the smartest guy in the match, grabs the belt and runs away. Everyone catches up to him in the back with 7:00 left. Rodney gets a fluke pin out of nowhere for the pin, which I believe is the Posse’s first pinfall. Joey suplexes him down and wins the title but Thrasher gets a clothesline and the title. Everyone beats up Thrasher now because its their job and we come into the arena again. Pete Gas hits Thrasher with a fire extinguisher and wins the title.

Taz gets his hands on the champion and brings him back to ringside for a beating. A t-bone suplex puts the bloody Pete down for the pin and the title with….dang it they took the clock down. Hardcore sends Taz into the steps for two before Mosh takes a shot at him. Taz rolls up Mosh for two on instinct alone. Now it’s the Hollys and Taz in the ring and three minutes to go. Crash gets cracked in the head by Taz for two which again means nothing. Hardcore puts Taz down and the cousins fight over a cover. Two minutes left and both Hollies get two off a powerslam by Hardcore.

We’ve got a minute left as Hardcore hits the dropkick for two. The champion hits a suplex on Hardcore to send him outside as Crash hits Taz with a trashcan lid for the title. The Tazmission goes on Crash but Hardcore blasts Taz in the head with a candy jar and covers Crash. The ending is screwed up though as Hardcore was supposed to get two but be stopped by the time.

Instead the referee had to stop counting…but Hardcore wins anyway. It made no sense, but either way the important thing here is Taz actually. That jar was made of real glass and when it shattered, some of it got in Taz’s eye. Allegedly he was supposed to win the Intercontinental Title but the reign went to Benoit instead.

Rating: B-. What do you want me to say about this? It was exactly what it was supposed to be so I can’t complain about it in that regard. They beat the tar out of each other with some funny spots and it was contained in one match instead of a big goofy show long angle like we had two years later. This rating could be all over the place depending on your taste for this stuff.

We look at Axxess over the weekend. Interestingly enough Undertaker is there in the biker attire.

Al Snow talks to someone in a bathroom stall when Steve Blackman comes in and says don’t do something stupid. This is during the Head Cheese (Snow and Blackman) attempt at finding Blackman a personality.

Trish is ready in the back.

Head Cheese vs. T&A

Snow brings out Chester McCheeserton, which is a guy in a cheese suit. Snow: “This is better than Shawn on a zipline.” That would be Test and Albert (Tensai) with the brand new Trish Stratus as their manager. Test and Blackman start as JR’s mic goes out. Test gets kicked down quickly but it’s off to Albert who hits a quick splash in the corner for two. Snow comes in for a few seconds but it’s quickly back to Steve for a running shoulder which takes Albert down.

Snow comes in again sans tag with a slingshot legdrop to the back of Albert’s head. Blackman breaks up a gorilla press attempt from Albert to give Snow two. Head Cheese double teams Albert as the fans are dying faster and faster by the minute here. Chester annoys Trish as Blackman drops a knee on Albert’s crotch. Off to Snow who gets caught in a suplex, allowing for the ice cold tag to Test.

T&A his a double powerbomb on Snow as JR calls it bowling shoe ugly. Snow hits an Asai Moonsault on Test before the modified Trash Compactor (backbreaker by Blackman/guillotine legdrop from Snow) for two on Test. The match breaks down even more as Albert hits a gorilla press on Blackman before a top rope elbow by Test gets the pin.

Rating: D-. Anything with Trish in an outfit that small can’t be a failure, but at the same time this match absolutely sucked. There was NOTHING good going on here and they weren’t just on different pages, but rather in different libraries. This was absolutely horrible and one of the worst Mania matches ever.

Post match Head Cheese beats up Chester. You know, because they’re good guys!

We get a “comedy” bit based off Austin Powers with Kat being sans clothes and Mae Young accidentally covering up the good parts.

The Dudleys say they’re afraid of heights but they’re ready for the triangle ladder match. This is when Bubba still had a stutter.

Tag Titles: Edge and Christian vs. Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz

The Dudleyz are defending and this is a triangle ladder match rather than a TLC match. That would come in September. This is when Edge and Christian still came through the crowd and somehow hadn’t won the tag titles yet. As the Dudleys pose in the aisle on a ladder during their entrance, the Canadians jump the only actual brothers in the match. This is going to be one of those matches that is almost impossible to keep track of. Bubba chops away at Jeff in the ring but gets caught by Whisper in the Wind. A Bubba Bomb puts Jeff right back down and they all head to the floor.

Christian sets up a ladder in the ring but Matt makes a save. Everyone gets back inside and there’s a second ladder. Matt throws one into the corner at Bubba for a sick thud right before D-Von is slammed onto a ladder and hit by a middle rope elbow. Jeff puts Bubba on the ladder but misses a 450, giving us a SICK looking crash. Bubba puts the ladder on top of Jeff and actually hits the middle rope backsplash to crush both of them. Edge rides a ladder out of the corner to crush another ladder onto Matt.

D-Von takes Edge down and all six guys are on the mat or floor now. Bubba is up first and we get the put the ladder around your own neck and spin around in a circle move. Edge and Christian finally dropkick the ladder into Bubba to put him down and there’s a double flapjack into the ladder in the corner on D-Von. Christian climbs a ladder and dives onto Matt and Bubba on the floor. This is all happening with almost no breaks in between. Jeff climbs the ladder in the ring but Edge jumps off the top with a spear. That would be topped by about 1000 next year.

Matt hits a crucifix bomb on Edge before trying to climb, only to be slammed down by D-Von. D-Von goes up, only to have Christian throw the ladder at him to bring him down. There are now three ladders set up in the middle of the ring and it’s Bubba with a Cutter to Christian off two of them. Awesome looking move there. With Bubba down, the Hardys hit a splash/legdrop combination off the top of the ladders. D-Von tries to climb but the Canadians suplex him off the ladder.

Everyone but the Dudleyz climb up but they all come flying down due to a facebuster and a Russian legsweep in another spot that would be topped next year. The Dudleys are back in now and the fans want tables. Now all six guys climb three ladders and as you can guess, they all go flying down. Christian and Jeff get the worst of it, crashing out to the floor. Bubba lands on his feet and shoves the other two ladders over, leaving him alone in the ring. D-Von is back up too but here’s Christian back to his feet, only to get crushed between two ladders.

Edge comes back in and gets caught in the original 3D, with Bubba running for the cutter instead of just standing there. Bubba loads up a table as is his custom and D-Von gets one of his own. There are two ladders set up in the ring and the Dudleys are all alone, but instead of climbing they make a scaffold out of a table between the tops of the ladders. The Hardys get back up to make the save but are easily dispatched. Again the Dudleys screw up though by setting up another table under the scaffold and a third on the floor.

Bubba powerbombs Matt through the one on the floor but D-Von misses a splash through Jeff on one of the tables back in the ring. Jeff tries to run the rail but Bubba pelts him in the face with a ladder. Bubba loads up the super ladder in the aisle before setting up a table in front of it. I can smell wrestling law #1 from here. Jeff comes back and takes Bubba out before putting him on the ladder. In the famous spot from this match, Jeff climbs to the top of the super ladder and hits the Swanton through Bubba through the table to put both of them out.

Back in the ring D-Von suplexes Christian down and goes for a climb but here’s Matt to break it up. The Twist of Fate takes D-Von down and now it’s Matt and Christian climbing the ladders. They both wind up on the scaffolding that was set up earlier but here’s Edge from behind. The brothers throw Matt through the table, allowing Edge and Christian to pull down the belts for their first titles.

Rating: A-. There are two problems with this match. First of all, the match the next year blows it away. Second, and far worse, the last ten minutes were spent setting up spots instead of actually going for the belts. Take the big spot of the match for example. Why in the world would Bubba do that instead of for the sake of doing that spot later? Same with all the other tables set up. There was no logic to doing that, but they did the spots anyway. Still though, excellently fun match.

Mick Foley and Linda McMahon say the main event tonight is the biggest match of all time and thanks to Linda, Mick gets to be in the main event at Wrestlemania. He says fairy tales can come true, one will come true for him.

Terri Runnels vs. The Kat

It’s a Catfight, meaning you have to put your opponent on the floor to win. Val Venis is referee and Moolah and Mae are in the respective corners. The referee compares a certain part of himself to Wrestlemania in a promo that would get him chased off by a pitchfork carrying mob in today’s world. Venis is in a referee’s towel too. Early on he picks up Terri and gets kissed in a spot that would have made the Montreal Screwjob completely different.

Kat hits a lame spear but Val has to stop Mae from flashing everyone. Terri is sent to the floor but there’s no referee. The old chicks get in the ring and Mae kisses Val. Kat throws Terri to the floor but Moolah pulls Kat to the outside. Terri is the only one in as Val escapes Mae, giving Terri the win. Total mess but it was a bridge between the big match and the rest of the show.

Terri is stripped post match.

The Radicalz are ready for the six man tag but Eddie is more interested in melting Chyna with the Latino Heat.

Radicalz vs. Too Cool/Chyna

This would be Saturn/Malenko/Guerrero. They’re brand new at this point and Dean is already Light Heavyweight Champion. Too Cool was their first feud and it was a big enough deal that Too Cool rode it to a tag title reign in a few months. Eddie and Scotty start things off and Scott has his hat knocked off almost immediately. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Eddie down and it’s off to Chyna, sending Guerrero running off to Dean.

Malenko loads up a fast powerbomb but Scotty clotheslines him down to break it up. Chyna and the Grandmaster suplex Malenko down and it’s time to dance. Back to Eddie to face Grandmaster with Sexay hitting a quick suplex. Saturn breaks up the top rope legdrop though and the Radicalz take over. Perry comes in legally now and steals Grandmaster’s dew rag, somehow making him look even more ridiculous.

Eddie comes back in and allows Grandmaster to make a tag to Scotty. That goes badly for the non Radicalzas Scotty charges into a hot shot followed by the slingshot hilo for no cover. Grandmaster comes back in sans tag and throws Eddie to the floor as things fall apart. Scotty loads up a double Worm on Saturn and Malenko but an Eddie distraction lets them get back up. There’s no one in the ring at the moment until we get back to Scotty vs. Eddie. Perry comes back in and superkicks Hotty down.

A top rope elbow hits Scotty but again there’s no cover. Instead it’s back to Guerrero who goes up but takes too long, allowing Scotty to crotch him. A superplex puts both guys down and there’s the hot tag to Chyna. She cleans house with handspring elbows and a double low blow to Saturn and Malenko. Eddie decks her though, breaking part of her outfit in the process. Chyna escapes a powerbomb into one of her own, grabs Eddie’s crotch and slams him down before finishing him with a sleeper drop.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work for me for the most part but the main story of Chyna vs. Eddie was advanced which is the right idea. This would wind up meaning nothing (in a way) though as Chyna would fall victim to the Latino Heat the next day, starting a summer long relationship between the two. I guess that crotch grab changed her mind.

The redneckiest rednecks of all time won a contest to go to Wrestlemania.

Big Show and Shane say Show will win.

We get a clip from earlier of Angle beating up his mentor Bob Backlund after finding out that Backlund came up with the idea of Kurt defending both titles.

Angle asks a security guard for extra security for the post match celebration.

Intercontinental Title/European Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

This is an interesting idea. Angle holds both titles coming in and there are going to be two falls here. The first is for the Intercontinental Title and the second is for the European Title, so basically we’re getting back to back triple threats. Jericho guarantees to walk out of this match as the Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah while the other two will walk out with a shirt that complains about how lousy the shirt is as well as how bad the beating from Jericho was.

Benoit jumps Angle before the bell before heading inside for a clothesline from his fellow Canadian. All three are in now and Benoit chops Jericho, only to have his belly to back suplex escaped. Benoit breaks up a springboard dropkick by Jericho before fighting with Angle on the apron. Jericho hits the previously broken up dropkick to send both guys out to the floor. He joins them immediately, only to be sent into the steps by Kurt. Back in and a belly to belly suplex gets two for Angle on Jericho.

Jericho hits a backbreaker on Angle but Benoit shoves Jericho off the top and into the announce table for good measure. Benoit covers Angle for two before suplexing him down for the same. Jericho is back in for a dropkick to his fellow Canadian but Benoit comes right back with a clothesline for two more. Jericho bulldogs Angle down but Benoit comes back with chops of his own on the other Chris. Angle suplexes Benoit down but Jericho makes the save. Very back and forth action so far.

Jericho camel clutches Benoit but has to break it up to stop a charging Kurt. Angle hits a big suplex on Jericho for two as Benoit makes another save. Benoit rolls up Jericho in the corner but Angle dropkicks his head face first into the middle buckle to break it up. Jericho loads up a double arm suplex on Angle but gets countered into a crossface chickenwing. Benoit comes back in and dropkicks Angle before sending him to the floor and into the barricade. Back in and the Swan Dive to Jericho gives Benoit the first fall and the Intercontinental Title.

Very wisely Benoit immediately covers Jericho for an attempt at the European Title but it only gets two as Kurt dives in for the save. Angle suplexes Benoit down for two but takes too long on the moonsault attempt, allowing Jericho to break it up. Jericho loads up a belly to back superplex but Benoit supelxes Chris down, allowing Angle to miss the moonsault on Benoit. All three guys are down now until Angle covers Benoit for two. Jericho gets back into it with a Walls attempt on Angle, only to have the other Chris break it up.

Everyone gets back up and it’s Jericho with a spinwheel kick to take Benoit to the floor. The double powerbomb puts Angle down but Benoit comes back in for the Rolling Germans on Jericho. Benoit goes old school with a Dragon Supelx on Angle for two. Jericho hits the forearm on the referee by mistake, only to be put in the Crossface by the new IC Champion.

It gets an unseen tapout but Benoit releases, allowing Jericho to put Benoit in the Walls. Angle hits Jericho with a title belt but Benoit makes the save as the referee is awake again. Benoit suplexes Angle down again but misses the Swan Dive. Jericho slides in for the Lionsault on Benoit for the European Title to end things.

Rating: B+. Awesome match here which would have been match of the year when this style dominated in 2003. All three guys were the future generation of the company once we shifted to the technical style over on Smackdown in a few years, but here it’s just awesome instead of a match of the times. This is one of the only things that people remember from this show and with good reason: it was awesome.

Vince says he’ll be a factor in the main event. He’s in Rock’s corner tonight and doesn’t think his family is dysfunctional. Vince promises to make it right tonight. You can smell the screwjob coming from here.

HHH doesn’t like what Vince just said and promises not to lose.

D-Generation X vs. Rikishi/Kane

This would be Road Dogg and X-Pac with Tori as the final surviving members of the team. Kane has the wicked awesome inverted colors on tonight with mainly black trimmed with red. Tori slaps Paul Bearer before the match but gets choked by Kane for his efforts. It’s a brawl to start with Rikishi hitting a quick Stinkface on Road Dogg. The fat man turns his attention to Tori but Pac makes a last minute save. D-X tries to leave to no avail as the big men slowly chase them down.

We finally get started with Pac vs. Rikishi and the smaller man hitting a spinning kick in the corner but no Bronco Buster follows. Off to Roadie for the dancing punches and a forearm to put Rikishi down. The shaky knee gets two and it’s back to Pac for some kicks to the chest which have no effect. A Samoan Drop puts Pac down and there’s the tag to Kane. Kane gets to beat up X-Pac which is the whole point of the match. X-Pac avoids the Stinkface but Bearer throws Tori in to take his place. Kane tombstones Pac to end this.

Rating: D. This was another way to bridge between the two matches while also giving us a nice closure to this feud. Rikishi was a popular guy at the time so giving him a big match on a show like this was the right idea. Tori screwed over Kane months before so seeing her get what was coming to her was a nice feeling. The match sucked though.

Post match Too Cool and the San Diego Chicken come out to celebrate but Kane doesn’t trust the bird. Everyone dances as Kane stares at the chicken. Either Pete is a far better dancer than expected or there’s something afoot. Kane stares down at the bird but here’s Pete Rose with a ball bat. This goes as badly as the other years have gone and it’s a chokeslam and a Stinkface for the Hit King. I’ll give the guy this: he’s willing to do almost whatever the WWF asked of him.

Rock says it’s been twelve months since he was world champion and there have been a lot of bad moments for Rock since then. After ever chokeslam, every Mandible Claw and every Pedigree, he’s back here at Wrestlemania for his world title. If Rock has an ounce of blood and sweat, he’s going to layeth the Smacketh Down tonight for the millions and millions.

Various celebrities are here tonight, including Michael Clarke Duncan and Martin Short.

Here’s a recap of the main event which the company doesn’t think is important enough to explain to you. HHH is defending champion and retired Foley at No Way Out. Rock won the Rumble but Big Show presented HHH with a video showing that Rock’s feet hit first. This got Big Show a match at No Way Out for the #1 contendership where he beat Rock. Rock then earned the shot back by beating Big Show on Raw. Linda McMahon brought Foley back for one night only and if he wins tonight, there’s a tournament leading up to the title match at Backlash.

The real story here is that there’s a McMahon in every corner: Vince with Rock because Vince respect him, Stephanie with her husband HHH, Linda with the feel good story of Foley and Shane with Big Show because he sees Show as his ticket to the top of the company. In other words, the wrestlers are just there as the McMahons are the real show here.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mick Foley vs. HHH vs. Big Show

There are no tags here, no disqualification and you have to win by pin. Why there are no submissions is beyond me but whatever. Rock and Big Show fight as do the other two with the champion being punched down. Allegedly Foley was told a week before this match that he would be participating so he isn’t in the best of shape. Granted that’s normal for him so maybe it won’t be that big of a deal.

Big Show runs over everyone and gorilla presses HHH and Rock. Foley gets a headbutt but tries to jump on Show’s back, only to have the giant crush him against the mat. Rock comes back with right hands on Big Show but walks into a side slam for no cover. HHH jumps into a chokeslam attempt but Foley breaks it up with a low blow. Everyone triple teams Big Show to a big reaction and a running clothesline from Rock puts him down. They all stomp away at the giant but HHH and Foley just can’t work together that long.

Foley blasts HHH in the ribs with a chair and hits Show in the back with it as well, allowing the Rock Bottom to get rid of the biggest guy in the match. We’re down to three now and Shane is ticked off. HHH offers Foley an alliance against Rock but Foley says no. Instead HHH offers Rock an alliance against Foley but we get a Rock and Sock Connection reunion as HHH gets beaten down. HHH gets punched down and dropped with a double clothesline.

The champion is sent to the floor but the Connection won’t fight each other. Instead they head to the outside and beat up HHH even more to the fans’ delight. Rock picks up the bell but accidentally blasts Foley in the head. Foley gets up quickly and finds a barbed wire 2×4. HHH saves himself with a low blow and a shot to Foley’s ribs with the board. Rock comes back in and is backdropped to the floor, allowing Foley to hit the double arm DDT on HHH. It’s Socko time and Rock adds a belt shot to take HHH down.

Rock loads up the Elbow but Foley puts the Claw on him to break it up. HHH hits them both low to put them both down but Rock gets back up first and pounds away on the champion. Foley gets in a shot to Rock for two and a double arm DDT gets the same. Vince slides in a chair for no apparent reason but Foley gets it first. It gets kicked back into his face by Rock for two as HHH makes the save. Why would he do something like that? A running knee lift gets two on Rock but HHH doesn’t save this time. Interesting.

HHH and Mick start working together for a bit and a knee drop gets two on Rock. They head to the floor with Mick’s knees being sent HARD into the steps. Mick picks up said steps and cracks Rock in the head with them as Stephanie yells at Linda. HHH puts Rock on the table for the Foley elbow through it….but Mick can’t jump that far and crashes ribs first into the edge of the table. HHH hits about three elbows of his own to put Rock through the table as the match continues to drag.

Back inside and HHH Pedigrees Foley for two and a big eruption from the crowd. A BIG chair shot to the head puts Foley down and Linda is panicking. HHH Pedigrees Mick onto the chair and the career is over again. We’re down to two now and HHH is somehow even more hated than he was before. Foley gets a big standing ovation but turns around to come back to the ring. He picks up the barbed wire and blasts HHH in the head to give us one last BANG BANG moment.

We’re finally down to HHH vs. Rock after twenty minutes of glorified preliminary stuff. Rock gets two off the barbed wire stuff and they head up to the stage for the required main event brawling. Rock suplexes HHH down on the concrete and does the same with a clothesline. They head into the crowd for even more “fighting” which means walking with the occasional punching. A backdrop puts HHH back at ringside where Rock picks up the steps, only to have HHH knock them onto Rock with a chair. He pounds on the steps with the chair to crush Rock even further underneath them.

A piledriver on the steps keeps Rock down even longer before we head inside again. The piledriver only gets two and Rock is somehow up again to slug away with right hands. Rock Bottom and Pedigree are both countered with HHH being backdropped out to the floor. Rock hits a kind of spinebuster to put HHH down and there’s a suplex through the table for good measure. Both guys are basically dead now but it’s Rock up first.

Vince can’t handle the lack of the spotlight anymore though and rams HHH into the post. Cue Shane again to take out Vince with a monitor shot to the head but Papa gets up a few seconds later to beat up his son. Shane comes back with a chairshot as we’re ignoring THE MAIN EVENT OF WRESTLEMANIA to see Shane and Vince fight. As a bleeding Vince is taken out, we cut to a shot of Stephanie with the most vapid look you’ll ever see on her face.

We’re allowed to return to the match now with right hands from Rocky. A DDT gets two on the champion as does a tilt-a-whirl slam. HHH comes back with a facebuster and a barbed wire shot to the head of Rock. At least he’s nice enough to loudly ask “ARE YOU OK” before being catapulted into Shane. There’s the Rock Bottom but Rock can’t cover. Instead here’s Vince for the 87th time tonight to slap Shane around. Then, as if you would expect anything else, he turns on Rock with a chair shot. Stephanie still fails at acting as HHH chairs Rock down again for the pin to retain and kill the crowd even deader.

Rating: D+. And that’s being VERY generous. This was the definition of McMahon overkill as it was ALL about them with the match literally being ignored at times while they had their repeated drama. On top of that the match sucked with the first 20 minutes being there to get us to the last 20 minutes which doesn’t do anyone any good. The rest of the match was just a big mess with no real story to it as we were all at the mercy of the McMahons. Instead of focusing on HHH vs. Rock, we had to wait 40 minutes for Vince to turn on Rock for no apparent reason. Also Rock would win the title at Backlash, making this entirely pointless.

Post match Vince and Stephanie reunite in the ring. Shane gets back in but before we can get more of McMahon World, Rock comes in with Rock Bottoms for all three McMahons. You might notice that HHH, the FREAKING WORLD CHAMPION, is nowhere in sight for all this. Oh wait he pops up on the apron to get punched down before Rock hits the People’s Elbow on Stephanie (who doesn’t even move an inch when it hits). The last shot of the show: the McMahons recovering of course.

Overall Rating: D. This show is the low point of the best year in the company’s history and it’s because of the McMahon drama. Again, there is zero reason to have them dominate a main event like this other than that’s what they wanted to happen. The stuff that was good though, while limited, was VERY good with the midcard title match and the tag title match blowing away everything else going on with this show. That main event is a BIG blow to it though given how long the thing ran. Check out those two matches and then go pick up the N64 game instead of the show as it’s WAY more entertaining.

Ratings Comparison

Big Boss Man/Bull Buchanan vs. D’Lo Brown/Godfather

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Hardcore Battle Royal

Original: C+

Redo: B-

T&A vs. Head Cheese

Original: F

Redo: D-

Edge and Christian vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz

Original: B+

Redo: A-

The Kat vs. Terri Runnels

Original: F

Redo: N/A

Radicalz vs. Too Cool/Chyna

Original: D

Redo: D+

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A

Redo: B+

Rikishi/Kane vs. D-Generation X

Original: D+

Redo: D

HHH vs. The Rock vs. Big Show vs. Mick Foley

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D

Redo: D

Not much changes in a few years.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/23/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-16-they-thought-this-was-a-good-idea/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XV: And People Still Defend Russo?

Wrestlemania XV
Date: March 28, 1999
Location: First Union Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 20,276
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This is a somewhat forgotten show and it’s pretty easy to see why: there isn’t much on here worth seeing. We’re full into Russo era now which means things are going to go REALLY fast but they’ll be changing so rapidly that there’s almost no lasting impact. The main event here is Austin facing Rock to get back the WWF Title that was unfairly stolen from him in the fall. That’s also pretty much the only match anyone remembers from the show. Let’s get to it.

Boyz II Men sing America the Beautiful. To say this is better than last year’s metal version of it is the understatement of the year.

The opening video is about stars of today becoming legends and how tonight is their night. The show is called the Showcase of the Immortals, which it is still called to this day.

Hardcore Title: Billy Gunn vs. Al Snow vs. Hardcore Holly

So for months leading up to this show, Billy Gunn had been chasing the IC Title and Road Dogg had been chasing the Hardcore Title. Before either of them got the big win, Russo thought it was a good idea to switch those things up and give them the opposite title than they were looking for. You know, because THAT MAKES SENSE. Gunn is defending if that wasn’t clear.

Billy tries to do his intro but Snow jumps him from behind. Holly jumps both of them and clotheslines Gunn inside out. Snow and Holly, the only people who actually have business in this match, go to the floor to annoy the Spanish broadcasters. Gunn follows them and is whipped knees first into the steps. That looked painful. Snow and Bob fight up the aisle with Holly hitting a suplex onto the concrete. Billy comes back and sends Snow into the steps but Al breaks up a piledriver attempt on Bob.

Snow finds a hockey stick from under the ring for no apparent reason and starts beating up both guys. The fans cheer for the Flyers as Billy uses a Gatorade bucket for good measure. Billy gets the stick and breaks it over his challengers’ backs before going back inside. Snow comes in with a broom to pound away on both guys and take over. Gunn brings in a chair but gets beaten down by a piece of the broom. Al uses the chair to load up some Poetry in Motion in the corner but he can only hit Gunn.

Holly sends Billy to the floor but gets dropped onto the barricade for his efforts. Snow hits them both with Head but pulls out a table instead of going for a cover. The table is set up in the corner but Holly clotheslines his way to safety. Billy comes back with a shot to Bob’s head and throws Snow through the table. The Fameasser onto a chair knocks Snow sane but Holly hits Gunn in the back with a chair and steals the pin on Snow for the title.

Rating: C-. This was fine but again, what sounds better: Road Dogg against two other hardcore experts or Billy Gunn who has had about two weeks in the division? The match here was nothing of note though as it was just the three of them hitting each other with the same spots we’ve seen a hundred times before. Nothing to see here for the mots part but it was a good enough opener.

Test and D’Lo Brown were the final two people in a battle royal on the Heat before the PPV, meaning they get a tag title shot. Seriously, that’s how weak the division is at this point.

Tag Titles: D’Lo Brown/Test vs. Owen Hart/Jeff Jarrett

The challengers fight with each other before the match starts. Owen and Jeff have Debra with them who is in a jacket and bikini. From the neck down she’s not bad at all. It’s a brawl to start and Test hits a fast big boot to take over. Brown and Jarrett get things going officially and D’Lo hits some fast clotheslines. Jeff charges into an elbow and it’s off to Test. He’s part of the Corporate Team while Brown has no connection to them whatsoever. A powerbomb gets two on Owen but he comes back with an enziguri, only to have Brown break up the Sharpshooter attempt.

Brown comes in legally and hits the shaky head legdrop for no cover but Jeff knees Brown in the back to give Owen an opening. A spinwheel kick puts D’Lo down for no cover as it’s back to Jarrett. Brown comes back with a double clothesline to both champions and hits something resembling a Sky High on Jeff. There’s no cover though as the managers (Ivory for the challengers) are fighting. In the distraction, Owen hits a missile dropkick on Brown to give Jeff the retaining pin.

Rating: C-. The match was ok enough but when the challengers are formed into a team 30 minutes before the match, it’s a little difficult to get behind a match like this. The tag division was BEGGING for something to save them here but it wouldn’t be until the fall when the Dudleys finally showed up and made the division worth something for a few more years.

Test and D’Lo fight on the floor which has no one caring at all.

We recap Butterbean vs. Bart Gun in a Brawl For All fight. Oh where do I even begin? So Bart Gunn shocked all of eight people (as in the amount of people that cared) by winning the shoot fight Brawl For All tournament back in the summer. This led to a REAL fight against a REAL world boxing champion here. You know, EIGHT MONTHS after he won the tournament.

Bart Gunn vs. Butterbean

The guest referee is Vinnie Pazienza, former world Middleweight Champion. The judges are boxing trainer Kevin Rooney, Chuck Wepner and Gorilla Monsoon, who would be dead soon after this. He looks AWFUL here as he’s lost about 200lbs due to illness. This would be his final public appearance. Bart is introduced as being from western Kentucky. That’s probably accurate as there aren’t many large towns over there so pinning it down to one single town is hardly an option.

I’d explain the rules and scoring here, but Butterbean DESTROYS Bart and knocks him down twice in 35 seconds. The second is as brutal of a punch as you’ll ever see. For the life of me I have NO IDEA what they were thinking here. I could watch Bart Gunn get knocked out like that for hours.

The San Diego Chicken is here in Philadelphia here for no apparent reason so Pazienza beats him up.

We recap Big Show beating up Mankind on Heat. They’re fighting tonight to get to referee the main event. Austin could be seen watching this in the back for some reason.

Mankind says that he’s done everything asked of him to be in the main event of Wrestlemania, but they keep throwing more stuff at him. If he has to beat Big Show, that’s what he has to do.

Big Show vs. Mankind

The winner gets to referee the title match tonight. Big Show already cost Mankind the world title on Raw a few weeks ago and Mankind is banged up coming into this. Mankind pounds away to start but is easily sent out to the floor by the power of the giant. Mankind is all cool with a brawl though and he sends Big Show head first into the steps. A DDT is broken up by Show though and the guy in a mask tastes the steps as well.

Back in and Show chops him down before hitting a Russian legsweep for no cover. Mankind gets in a shot and loads up the Claw, only to be sent flying for a second. The Claw goes on but Show headbutts him down with ease. Back to the Claw and a low blow is enough to keep the hold on for a bit.

Despite being in a former world champion’s hold for about a minute straight, Show gets Mankind on his back and crashes down onto Foley to break the hold. Foley’s ribs are messed up bad now and Show stomps away even more. They head to the floor and Show hits him in the ribs with a chair….and that’s not a DQ. Show throws two chairs into the ring and sets them up. He chokeslams Mankind through both chairs and THAT is enough for the DQ.

Rating: D. Yeah this sucked. This would fall into the category of matches that were overbooked to overbook another match. If that doesn’t sum up the Russo Era in a nutshell, I’m not sure what does. The match sucked on top of all that, as it was a very slow power brawl. Foley would take awhile to get back into form but at this point he was just kind of going through the motions.

Post match Vince comes out to yell at Big Show but has to talk his way out of a chokeslam. That’s the least of his problems though as Big Show knocks Vince out cold with a right hand. The Stooges carry Vince to the back as Foley is taken out on a stretcher.

In the back, Vince wants the cops called.

Intercontinental Title: Road Dogg vs. Goldust vs. Ken Shamrock vs. Val Venis

Dogg is defending and this under elimination rules. Goldust has Ken’s sister Ryan as well as Blue Meanie with him. A rana sends Goldust to the floor in the opening melee until we get down to Shamrock vs. Dogg as there are tags in this. Dogg gets in some right hands and a dropkick to Shamrock before bringing in Goldie to pound away on Ken. Venis replaces Shamrock and escapes the Curtain Call.

A spinebuster gets two on Goldust but he comes back with a clothesline to take Val down for two. Goldust loads up a superplex but slips off the rope, allowing Val to bulldog him down for two. A fisherman’s suplex gets two for Val but after they collide in the corner, Val’s face meets Goldie’s crotch. Shamrock comes in to DDT Goldust but Dogg DDTs Venis at the same time, putting both guys out.

Goldust covers Venis for two and Shamrock is furious at the kickout. Did I mention Val slept with Ken’s sister of whom Ken is VERY protective? Dogg comes in illegally and pounds away on Val before doing the same on Dogg. The shaky kneedrop hits Shamrock for good measure but Val suplexes the champion down for two. Roadie comes back with the simulated anal rape pumphandle slam to Val before Shamrock puts Venis in the ankle lock.

Val somehow makes the rope and backdrops Shamrock to the floor. Venis goes out after him and it’s a lame double countout to get us down to two. Shamrock comes back in anyway and beats up everyone left in the match while screaming and dropping a lot of F Bombs. Ryan trips Goldust for no apparent reason whatsoever, allowing Roadie to roll him up for the pin to retain.

Rating: C. Decent match until the ending fell flat. Here’s Russo’s booking in a nutshell: take Billy Gunn, as in the guy that started the whole mess with Ryan out and replace him with Road Dogg who only has the title in this whole mess. That leaves you with Ken as the jealous brother along with Val as guy who loved her and left her, and Goldust as the freak perverting Ryan’s mind.

Then you give us Goldust and Dogg to finish things, despite them having no history of problems at all, unlike Billy and any of the three, who had been fighting for months. See the REALLY big issue here? Goldust would win the title the next night, making this even stupider. You know, because you want to change the title on Raw, not AT WRESTLEMANIA or someplace worthless like that.

Big Show is arrested, another Russo trope.

We recap HHH vs. Kane. Chyna had turned on DX and joined the Corporation I believe late last year. A few weeks before this she was holding HHH for a fireball shot from Kane, only to take it herself. HHH standing up for the honor of his friend who isn’t his friend anymore because she turned on him. As an act of friendship, HHH painted himself gold and wore a flowery robe while imitating a crossdresser and launched a flamethrower at Kane, burning him again.

HHH vs. Kane

Kane is in the Corporation against his will at this point. As Kane makes his entrance, here’s the San Diego Chicken from earlier to jump Kane. He’s quickly unbeaked and it’s Pete Rose again to continue the running joke from last year. At least he used to play in Philly so there’s a connection to the town. After that ends, HHH sneaks through the crowd and hits Kane low to start, which actually hurts him now as opposed to previous attempts at it.

HHH pounds away to start but Kane keeps shoving him away. Kane charges into a backdrop to the floor though and they fight on the floor for a bit. Kane accidentally clotheslines the post and is sent HARD into the steps. A baseball slide puts Kane into the barricade before they head back inside. Kane boots HHH down and throws him right back to the floor. HHH climbs the steps but gets grabbed by the throat and crotched on the barricade. The Mean Street Posse is here for no apparent reason.

Kane rams the future Game’s back into the post a few times before we head back in again. HHH gets slugged down in the corner and an uppercut keeps him down even longer. There’s a big leg for two and HHH is in trouble. He gets shoved out to the floor again and Kane DIVES over the top to take him out again, getting almost no reaction from the crowd at all. Back in and HHH breaks up the top rope clothesline with a beal off the top.

HHH slugs away and hits a Pedigree to stagger Kane. The jumping knee to the face puts Kane down and here’s Chyna. The tombstone and Pedigree are both escaped and Chyna slides in the steps. Both guys are down from something we didn’t see due to the camera being on Chyna but it’s Kane up first. He picks up the steps but Trips kicks them back into his face. Yes, he did something not involving his knees.

HHH hits a DDT onto the steps and clotheslines Kane to the floor. How has there not been a DQ yet? A Pedigree onto the steps is easily countered and we head inside where Kane hits the chokeslam. Instead of covering though, Kane lets Chyna come in with a chair. She hits Kane with it though, turning again and drawing a DQ in the process.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but HHH wasn’t quite ready to hang in a feud like this. He was on the rise, but it would take the street fight at the Rumble to make HHH into a guy that could hang in a fight like this and make it look believable. Chyna turning was a feel good moment but it would wind up being rather stupid in the end. The match wasn’t bad, but much like everything else tonight it’s forgettable.

HHH saves Chyna with some chair shots and a Pedigree on the chair.

Vince says he’ll referee the title match tonight. Again notice that all these angles are being used on the PPV that we already bought rather than to get people to buy the PPV that was already purchased.

Women’s Title: Sable vs. Tori

This is just after Sable turned heel. She’s defending against a psycho fan named Tori here who would wind up sleeping with X-Pac and Kane. Sable won’t let her get in so she dances a bit. Tori, wearing a Catwoman/Giant Gonzalez body suit, pulls the champion to the floor and sends her into the apron a few times, only to get kicked in the ribs by Sable. You can actually see people coming in and going out with food in hand during this match.

Sable dives off the apron to take Tori out before we head back inside. Tori comes back with some shots to the face and a bad looking sunset flip. They BADLY screw up a backslide which gets two on Sable before a bad looking cross body takes out the referee. Cue Nicole Bass who makes Chyna look like a 12 year old girl to slam Tori down. She tells Sable to pin her and the title is retained off a Sable Bomb.

Rating: F. Do I need to explain this one? I didn’t think so. Tori makes Aksana look like Trish and Lita combined if that tells you anything. They sloppiness in this match was cringe worthy and Sable continues to not be able to do anything of note in the ring other than shake her hips and take her clothes off. Nothing to see here at all.

We recap Shane vs. X-Pac. Basically Shane has no idea what to do in the ring but thanks to the Corporation he took the European Title in a tag match. This led to some humorous skits about how tough the streets of Greenwich, Connecticut were and how Shane is the kind of the streets. Shane challenged Pac to a Greenwich street fight on Raw, allowing the Mean Street Posse to help beat up X-Pac. Tonight is about revenge.

X-Pac says he’ll win because Chyna has come home.

European Title: Shane McMahon vs. X-Pac

Test is with the champion Shane here and the Stooges jump Pac in the aisle for good measure. Pac fights them off with ease and we’re ready to go. Shane imitates a bad car by stalling a lot and the chase is on. Back inside and Shane gets a nice leapfrog but gets kicked in the face to take him down. Pac loads up the Bronco Buster but Test makes the save before the Buster can hit. Shane heads up the ramp but can’t get away as the challenger brings him back to ringside. Test throws X-Pac into the post and Shane gets a breather in the ring.

McMahon pounds away on X-Pac in the corner and slams him down to set up a Corporate Elbow. Pac rolls away though, only to get caught by a low blow. Shane gets Test’s belt and whips Pac’s back as Cole talks about Shane getting disqualified. X-Pac sends him to the floor and there’s the big dive to take the champion out. The Posse tries to interfere but gets beaten down for their efforts. An elbow puts X-Pac down back in the ring and a middle rope variety keeps him down. Shane goes up top but takes too long, allowing the Greenwich grapefruits to get crotched.

There’s a superplex but Test breaks up the pin. X-Pac takes Test out and whips Shane with the belt for some revenge. Now the Bronco Buster hits but Test knocks Pac out with the title belt. That gets two for Shane but his own Bronco Buster misses. Test comes in for the 58th time but gets hit with a Bronco Buster of his own. Cue HHH and Chyna…..who turn on X-Pac, joining the Corporation, THIRTY MINUTES AFTER THEY REUNITED IN DX. The Pedigree on X-Pac lets Shane keep the title.

Rating: D. In less than nine minutes, we had six people interfere, two different belts being used, a low blow, about five interferences by Test, and two people turning on X-Pac. This is all for a midcard title match with a guy that can’t wrestle getting to keep the title from the fan favorite. Ladies and gentlemen, VINCE FREAKING RUSSO!!! The match sucked for the most part but Pac did what he could.

The Outlaws come out for a save but get beaten down for good measure, because you fans aren’t allowed to cheer. Now cue KANE to chase off the Corporation, basically turning face in the process. There’s such a thing as WAY overthinking things and this is a good example of it.

We recap Undertaker vs. Big Boss Man. Basically Undertaker has gone cuckoo and is trying to take over the company while impersonating Satan. This led to a cross being burned on Vince’s lawn and Stephanie’s teddy bear being burned. Taker beat up Vince but Boss Man made the save. This leads to Hell in a Cell tonight, because that recap clearly is enough for a Cell match right?

Undertaker vs. Big Boss Man

Inside the Cell. In 1999. Just go with it. Boss Man DOESN’T EVEN GET AN ENTRANCE. WOW they’re not even trying to hide that this is going to be one sided are they? Boss Man pounds away in the corner and Taker does the same for good measure. A clothesline puts Boss Man down for two as the uninspired stuff continues. Boss Man gets the same for two but a boot to the chest is blocked by Undertaker. They head to the floor with Boss Man being slammed into the Cell. Cole: “This is such a dangerous match. YOU CAN GET A FINGER CAUGHT IN THERE!” Just go with it.

Anyway Boss Man comes back with more punches to the face and handcuffs him to the cage. On the floor, as in where you can’t get a win. Boss Man pounds away with the stick as the fans are REALLY not impressed. Undertaker falls down and the cuff is broken off the wall. Well that was rather pointless.

Taker is almost kind of maybe bleeding as he pulls out a chair. This is really boring so far. Boss Man goes face first into the wall as the fans are booing now. Taker hits the jumping clothesline but Old School is broken up, sending the Dead Man out to the floor again. Back in and the Tombstone is countered, only for the second attempt to hit a few seconds later.

Rating: F. No. Where’s the real Cell match? You don’t go from Shawn vs. Taker to “He may he broken in half” to this. That doesn’t work and there’s no reason to assume it does work. This was a terribly boring match with the tiniest trickle of blood you can have while still officially having blood. Horrible match that would have been bad as a first hour match on Raw, let alone the next to last match on WRESTLEMANIA.

Post match the Brood lowers from the ceiling and breaks into the top of the Cell, lowering a noose into the ring. Boss Man is hung from the top of the cage in an unnecessary visual.

We recap Austin vs. the Corporation. Austin drove McMahon crazy for most of 1998 before Vince FINALLY got the title off of him in the fall. Rock won the vacant title by turning Corporate and becoming the Corporate Champion. Austin was screwed out of the Royal Rumble, but Shawn Michaels changed sides and gave Austin the title shot at Wrestlemania anyway.

Jim Ross comes out to call the main event. He’s returning from a bout with Bell’s palsy.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Vince is guest referee due to the issues earlier tonight. Oh wait here’s Shawn Michaels, the Commissioner, to say that Vince isn’t referee and that it’s going to be a normal referee. The Corporation is barred from ringside as well. Rock is defending if that wasn’t really clear. The place of course goes INSANE for Austin, who for some reason is in an Austin t-shirt instead of the trademark vest. It’s a brawl to start as you would expect with Austin being knocked out to the floor and sent into the announce table. Apparently Vince does have the power to make this No DQ.

Back in for more punching by Rock but he gets backdropped up and over to the floor a second later. They brawl into the crowd where we can barely see them but it’s Philly so it has to be expected. Austin blasts the Rock in the back and they head back to ringside. Scratch that as they’re already going back into the crowd on the other side of the arena. Back to ringside again and Austin is choked with a cable for a bit.

Now they fight up the aisle with Austin hitting a fast clothesline. Austin loads up a piledriver on the concrete, only to be backdropped onto a light instead. Rock is thrown into some kind of equipment and they clothesline each other. Now it’s Rock being choked by a cable and then being thrown into the Wrestlemania XV sign, which wobbles in a scary sight. Rock suplexes Austin in the aisle and spits some water in his face at the announce table. Austin drops him face first onto the barricade before laying him on the announce table for an elbow drop which doesn’t break anything.

The second attempt at an elbow puts Rock through the table and we head back into the ring after about eight minutes of brawling. Wait Rock bails to the floor and wraps Austin’s bad knee around the post. They’re still not ready to stay in the ring as Austin sends Rock into the steps and stomps away a bit more. NOW we head back inside but Austin walks into the Rock Bottom for two. Rock brings in a chair but Austin takes it away and cracks the referee with it by mistake.

A Stunner is blocked and Rock elbows Austin down before laying him out with the chair. Another referee comes in for a two count off a chair shot to the head. Off to a chinlock for an understandably needed breather. Austin fights back up, only to be clotheslined right back down. Back to el chinlock but they fight up again, only for the referee to go down AGAIN. The Stunner hits but Earl Hebner runs down for a very close two. Here’s Vince again as Austin gets a fresh chair.

The distraction lets Rock hit Austin low to block a chair shot and Vince gets in as well. Vince drops Hebner and it’s a double team beatdown on Austin. Cue a hobbled Mick Foley to beat up Vince and count a fast two on Rock. The Thesz Press takes Rock down but Rock comes back with a clothesline and another Rock Bottom. Austin avoids the Elbow, fights out of another Rock Bottom, and Stuns his way to a third world title.

Rating: B-. This one really depends on your taste. They didn’t try to have a regular match here at all and maybe that was the right idea. It’s definitely the weakest of the Austin vs. Rock at Wrestlemania trilogy but Rock wasn’t ready to hang with Austin in a match like this year. The rematch at Backlash would be AWESOME to make up for this, but even this wasn’t bad. It’s very typical of the time, which doesn’t make it dull. This was definitely entertaining, but it’s certainly not for everyone.

Austin celebrates for a LONG time post match and stuns Vince for good measure to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Austin vs. Rock is definitely worth seeing, but the fact that I couldn’t think of a single match other than that one when I was getting ready to do this one says a lot. The show is completely forgettable because of how fast everything was moving out there. That doesn’t make it entertaining, but rather bad most of the time and one of the worst Wrestlemanias ever.

Ratings Comparison

Hardcore Holly vs. Billy Gunn vs. Al Snow

Original: D+

Redo: C-

D’Lo Brown/Test vs. Owen Hart/Jeff Jarrett

Original: F+

Redo: C-

Butterbean vs. Bart Gunn

Original: F

Redo: N/A

Mankind vs. Big Show

Original: C-

Redo: D

Ken Shamrock vs. Road Dogg vs. Goldust vs. Val Venis

Original: D

Redo: C

Kane vs. HHH

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Tori vs. Sable

Original: F

Redo: F

X-Pac vs. Shane McMahon

Original: C+

Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Big Boss Man

Original: H (For holy goodness why was this a Cell match?)

Redo: F

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Original: B+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: D

Redo: D

Individual ratings aside, it still sucks.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/22/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-15-this-is-the-best-they-can-do/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/


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http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6