Monday Night Raw – September 21, 2015: Running On Empty Again

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 21, 2015
Location: Laredo Energy Arena, Laredo, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

It’s the night after Night of Champions and it seems that we’re heading for Kane vs. Rollins for the World Title at Hell in a Cell. On the same show we’ll be seeing Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar for the last time in a match that was a potential Wrestlemania headliner. As for tonight, there’s also a chance we’ll see the return of the US Open Challenge as John Cena regained the US Title last night. Let’s get to it.

We open with the Wyatts instead of the traditional recap. Bray tried to warn Roman Reigns with words but he just didn’t speak loudly enough. Then he tried to warn Roman with actions but he just didn’t hit hard enough. Then last night he choked the golden idol by the throat and showed that he was right about everyone falling down.

Cue Reigns to say he wants to finish this with Bray, one on one, right now. This doesn’t even need to be a match because they can just have a fight. Harper and Strowman head to the floor and Bray is ready to fight. Reigns takes over with right hands and the corner clotheslines, followed by the Superman Punch.

This brings Strowman and Harper back in but Ambrose charges out, runs by Strowman in a smart move, and fights Harper. A pair of suicide dives have almost no effect on Braun but Reigns gets back up. Unfortunately so does Bray and the Wyatts’ numbers game takes over. This brings out Randy Orton to even things up and the combined forces of a bunch of right hands, a missile dropkick and the Superman Punch finally knock Strowman to the floor, though never off his feet. How nice was it to open with a fight and a return instead of a lot of talking that will only be repeated 95 times later in the night?

We recap Rollins’ two title defenses from last night, as well as Sheamus not being able to cash in due to masked Kane’s return.

Rollins comes in to the Authority’s office and finds a very perky Corporate Kane. The monster says he’s back and asks if Seth got the e-mail. The Authority isn’t here yet but Kane has arranged for Seth to have his rematch for the US Title tonight. This was the most entertaining Kane has been since HELL NO.

Lucha Dragons/Neville vs. Ascension/Stardust

Rematch from last night’s pre-show. Sin Cara and Konor starts with Cara slipping off the top on a springboard attempt. It was just a slip and not a horrible botch but it looked bad. After some stomps from the villains it’s time for a chinlock from Konor. Stardust comes in for a cartwheel, allowing the tag off to Neville. Viktor tries to break up a Red Arrow attempt like he did last night but Neville jumps over him, only to get Disaster kicked out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Neville in the wrong corner with Konor being launched at him for two. Off to the chinlockery for a bit before Stardust puts Neville into an inverted Gory Stretch of all things. Neville finally kicks Konor in the head and makes the tag off to Kalisto. Everything breaks down with Cara running back in for a suicide dive on Konor. Stardust gets dropkicked to the floor and the Salida Del Sol pins Viktor at 10:32.

Rating: C-. The botches really hurt things here and dragged down what could have been a fun six man tag. Sometimes things can get dicey when you try to move too fast. This could have been a lot worse but the Cara botch set the stage for the match. I’m not sure where the feud goes from here, but maybe they both add a fourth for some Survivor Series action.

The limping Rollins comes up to the Authority to ask what they’re thinking about reinstating Kane. They have no idea what he’s talking about, but apparently Kane was allowed to make Cena vs. Rollins again tonight.

Stills of Kevin Owens winning the Intercontinental Title last night.

Ryback vs. Bo Dallas

Owens comes out to do commentary. Bo congratulates Kevin on his win and is thrown across the ring by Ryback. Dallas gets shoved down and a suplex gets two. Cole asks about Owens raking Ryback’s eyes to win the title last night. Owens tells Cole not to believe everything he reads on the internet. Dallas comes back with a kick to the face and a chinlock but Ryback shrugs him off. The Meat Hook and Shell Shock put Dallas away at 3:40.

Rating: D. Just a plot device here and another good use of a jobber. I’m fine with Dallas losing because his character is the kind of person who can pop right back up with a single obnoxious promo. Owens vs. Ryback is a feud that has potential if they go somewhere, which hopefully seems to be a possibility.

Owens goes after Ryback post match but has to run away from a Shell Shock attempt.

Here’s Ric Flair to talk about how proud of a father he is. The fans start chanting THANK YOU RIC but Flair quickly thanks the fans to get this back on Charlotte. The proudest moment of his life wasn’t all his World Titles but rather last night when his daughter won her first Divas Championship. This brings out Team PCB to celebrate. Charlotte has to fight back tears because she’s a Flair.

She’s fought a long way to get here and gained two best friends on the way. Becky makes her laugh every day and Paige is the woman whose footsteps she followed in. Paige takes the mic and says that this is all because of her. Yeah Charlotte won the title last night but Paige won it on her first night. The first time Charlotte defends the title, the Bellas will win it back and everything goes back to normal.

There is no Divas Revolution because Becky is irrelevant, Charlotte is just a placeholder and Team Bad is all flash and no substance. Then you have Summer Rae and Lana who are trying to figure out who to climb on top of next. There’s Nattie, who doesn’t seem like she works here anymore.

Everyone knows why the Bellas are where they are (implying relationships with Cena and Bryan but not actually saying it because Nikki and Cena aren’t a thing outside of Total Divas). Paige says that Charlotte is where she is because of her old man and walks off. Cue the Bellas with Nikki saying that Charlotte is going to lose because she can’t handle the pressure of being Divas Champion. The Bellas really should have been saved for later because the turn didn’t get the chance to sink in but it still worked very well.

Brie Bella vs. Charlotte

Non-title. Brie starts fast with a middle rope dropkick and knocks the champ to the floor. The bad knee from last night gets sent into the steps and Charlotte is in early trouble. There’s a dragon screw leg whip followed by a leg lock as Becky plays cheerleader. A dropkick to the ribs gets two and a chop block puts Charlotte back down again. Off to a half crab for a bit until Charlotte comes up with an enziguri. The neckbreaker and spear set up the Figure Eight to make Brie tap at 6:24.

Rating: D+. Can someone explain the logic of having Charlotte on defense for about 90% of her title win and first match as champion? I mean, she’s considered awesome for her abilities on offense and athleticism so you have her on the mat holding her knee most of the time? Brie is the less talented Bella, which really should tell you most of what you need to know about this match.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Henry runs him over to start and it’s time for a breather on the floor. A clothesline does the same but Sheamus comes back with the ten forearms. Mark breaks it up at about six or seven but the Brogue Kick puts Mark away at 2:26.

Sheamus says it’s a matter of time until he’s World Champion.

The Authority comes in to see Kane. Instead of asking why they waited an hour to come talk to him, they ask why they didn’t hear from him since he got hurt. Kane brushes it off and says he wanted to make a big impact tonight by making Cena vs. Rollins for the US Title. Stephanie wants Kane to give it back and holds her hand out. Kane high fives her but Stephanie wants the mask. The mask is gone from its case and Kane accuses Stephanie of losing it. Kane is happy to help her look for it though and smiles a lot.

Natalya comes up to see Paige and says Paige isn’t the only one who has been frustrated. The only person standing in Paige’s way has been Paige herself.

New Day/Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler/Dudley Boyz

Before the match, Woods holds up a piece of table in a bag which was apparently removed from his……shall we say nether region. Kofi asks how many tables must be destroyed. Big E. suggests building a wall around Dudleyville to keep those Dudleys away from our people, our values, and our tables. Kofi and Ziggler get things going with Kingston grabbing a top wristlock. Kofi’s leapfrogs set up a monkey flip but Dolph lands on his feet.

Off to D-Von for a legdrop and right hands, followed by the belly to back neckbreaker on Big E. Rusev scampers to the floor and we take a break. We come back with Ziggler dropkicking Big E. but having to scare Woods off the apron, allowing E. to score with a clothesline. Rusev stomps away and it’s time for the rotating stomps, complete with trombone accompaniment.

Rusev comes in so Xavier plays Rusev’s theme music as we hit the chinlock on Ziggler. A back elbow to the jaw drops Ziggler (Woods: “BULGARIAN TRICEP MEAT! WHY DOES ZIGGLER HAVE ZIPPERS AND NO POCKETS???”) and Big E. comes in for an abdominal stretch. Kofi breaks up the hot tag attempt and dropkicks Kofi down for two. It’s back to Rusev for choking as he shouts that Lana is his.

The running DDT finally allows a diving tag to Bubba and everything breaks down. A big boot puts E. down and it’s off to Ray vs. Rusev. Well for all of five seconds as D-Von comes in for a double suplex, followed by Dolph playing D-Von in What’s Up. Ziggler superkicks the trombone out of Woods’ hands (thankfully Summer makes the catch) but turns into a superkick from Rusev for the pin at 14:12.

Rating: B-. Oh man Woods gets better every week. This is what I’ve been talking about with comedy in wrestling: you can tell that these guys have been told to go out there and do whatever they think is funny and they’re running with it. It’s a different style than what WWE decides is funny and it makes for something much more entertaining. The day that trombone (seriously, they got a trombone over. I can’t get past that.) gets broken, which better not be for at least another four months, is going to be glorious.

We recap Kane’s odd antics throughout the night.

Natalya vs. Naomi

Both girls flip up to their feet to start until Naomi kicks Natalya in the face for two. We hit an early chinlock as Paige is shown watching in the back. Back up and Natalya makes her comeback, including a discus lariat (Me: “JBL is going to say shades of her daddy.” JBL: “SHADES OF HER DADDY!”) but a Sasha distraction lets the Rear View end Natalya at 3:46.

Rating: D. I’m so glad we got Natalya back for this mess. There’s a chance this leads to her teaming with Paige under their common issue of being held back. It’s worked for less talented people before so why not these two also. The match was nothing special but it’s cool to see at least one team sticking around.

Rollins asks the Authority about the plan for tonight. HHH gets all serious and tells Seth to worry about Cena because they’ll take care of Kane. This has been another moment where HHH’s emotions change on a dime and it’s considered totally normal.

Cesaro vs. Big Show

Rematch from Smackdown which isn’t important enough to mention. Cesaro gets chopped out of the air to start and runs him over with a shoulder. Show launches him across the ring as this is a total squash so far. The Final Cut sets up a chinlock until Show misses an elbow. Cesaro starts his comeback and breaks up the chokeslam. Show is knocked to the floor for a European uppercut, only to catch Cesaro’s cross body off the announcers’ table and drive Cesaro into the post. Back inside and Cesaro suplexes Show from the apron back inside, only to have Show KO Cesaro for the pin at 6:30.

Rating: D. I know WWE says they’re making movies. This must be where they show the trailers over and over again (because this is the same ending as the Smackdown match) and then expect us to see a movie where we know the ending because it’s a sequel to the wreck of last year’s Royal Rumble and EVERY MATCH THESE SHOW AND LESNAR HAVE HAD IN LIKE TEN YEARS. Of course there was no one in the back that you could have take this loss instead of Cesaro too. No one. Not Swagger or anyone, who is even more like Lesnar than Cesaro. Typical WWE.

Post match Show says he’s going to knock Lesnar out and pin him like he did in 2002. For some reason this takes like three minutes.

We recap the Wyatt Family/Orton/Ambrose/Reigns segment from earlier.

Harper says he hears Bray’s voice in his head. Bray taught him to learn from his mistakes but Orton never learned that lesson. Strowman talks about skinning a snake and drinking its blood. Bray says Randy will fall like everyone else. It’s amazing how much better this team is when Bray isn’t losing every other week.

US Title: John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Cena is defending. Rollins jumps the champ during the intros and gets an early two. Some right hands have Cena in trouble. Like, way more trouble than a sneak attack and some right hands should have him in. The Pedigree is countered and an enziguri gets two. Cena comes back with that big clothesline that he uses when he needs to make a comeback but the announcers are too busy talking about the Kane story to notice. Seth escapes the AA and scores with a DDT for two.

Back with Seth putting on a chinlock, followed by a shot to Cena’s face. Cena comes back with the usual but Rollins bails to the floor after the Shuffle. John throws him back in but a superplex is broken up, allowing Rollins to get two off a low superkick. We hit the STF on Cena but he muscles his way up for the counter.

The Pedigree is countered with a catapult into the corner and Cena pulls him off the middle rope with an electric chair. They counter finisher attempts until the Buckle Bomb sets up a Falcon’s Arrow for two on Cena. Cena grabs a quick STF but Rollins grabs a rope even faster. A Five Star Frog Splash gets two on Cena but he rolls through into the AA for the pin to retain at 15:38.

Rating: B. I would have had a lot more fun with this match if I hadn’t seen it a day ago. Also if there was any sort of a chance that Cena was going to lose. Thirdly, was it really necessary to have the World Champion lose a second match clean in two days? I know it’s Cena, but stop having that happen. Now let’s get to the obvious Demon Kane moment.

Post match Corporate Kane pops up on screen and says everyone is coming for the title. People Rollins wouldn’t even imagine. Like the people from his worst nightmares. Cue the demon Kane through a hole in the ring to drag Seth under. Yes they’re REALLY doing this again.

Overall Rating: C+. This show started off with so much promise and then, as is way too often the case, it died about halfway through. Raw runs out of steam way too often these days and it really is just because of that third hour. The night after a pay per view is really rough because you’re looking at six hours of TV in just over a day. It’s too much and drains way too much out of the fans when they’re asked to watch it. The first hour carries this show, but they need to find a way to make this three hour work, because the fans are going to go away more and more with this much TV time to sit through.

Results

Neville/Lucha Dragons b. Ascension/Stardust – Salida Del Sol to Viktor

Ryback b. Bo Dallas – Shell Shock

Charlotte b. Brie Bella – Figure Eight

Sheamus b. Mark Henry – Brogue Kick

New Day/Rusev b. Dolph Ziggler/Dudley Boyz – Superkick to Ziggler

Naomi b. Natalya – Rear View

Big Show b. Cesaro – KO Punch

John Cena b. Seth Rollins – Attitude Adjustment

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Smackdown – September 17, 2015: Bring Back Livewire

Smackdown
Date: September 17, 2015
Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Booker T., Jerry Lawler, Rich Brennan

It’s the final show before Night of Champions 2015 and that likely means we’ll be focusing on the midcard matches. If the past few Smackdowns before pay per views are any indications, that means it’s likely going to be about Ambrose/Reigns vs. the Wyatts while they tease who the third man might be. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Sting’s two matches on Monday, neither of which were important enough to announce more two and a half hours early.

Here’s Seth for his opening statement. When he defends the US Title this Sunday, he’s going to remind John Cena of what happened to him at Summerslam. Sting is going to get what’s coming to him on Sunday. As for Sheamus, tonight he and Rollins will team up to face Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose and Rollins will show Sheamus what happens to him if he tries to cash in.

This brings out Sheamus to ask if Seth sees him as a friend or an enemy. Rollins agrees with the fans’ chants of YOU LOOK STUPID but Sheamus demands that they respect the hawk. Sheamus says the exact same things he’s said for three weeks now and Rollins smirks it off. Nothing new here and I don’t buy the threat of a cash-in on Sunday. They do this every fall and it hasn’t happened in years.

Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Paige/Becky Lynch

Becky hammers Naomi in the face to start and knocks her into the corner for the tag off to Banks. Sasha quickly fights back and slams Becky on the back of her head as we take an early break. Back with Becky in trouble in the corner as Banks jumps down onto her ribs. Naomi does the same before it’s back to Sasha for an abdominal stretch. Basic psychology here so far. Becky gets away and makes the tag off to Paige for her assortment of superkicks and knees to the face. Becky pulls Sasha off the apron but distracts her partner by mistake, allowing Naomi to small package Paige for the pin at 9:02.

Rating: C. The story continues to build to Paige turning on her teammates and blaming them for all of her troubles. This was a better match than most from the Divas because they were working on a body part instead of just doing all their spots. It’s the difference between having a match instead of having a collection of moves.

Stardust and the Ascension are ready for Neville and the Lucha Dragons on Sunday’s pre-show. Simple promo to build up a match.

Kofi Kingston vs. D-Von Dudley

The SAVE THE TABLES signs are back! Before the match, Xavier wants to talk about a special woman: Mother Nature. Big E.: “She’s a bad mother!” Woods: “SHUT YOUR MOUTH!” They have a petition on a clipboard (Woods: “That’s like a mini table!”) to save the tables and want the Dudleyz to sign right now. Kofi wants us to know that only we can prevent table poaching. D-Von isn’t interested in signing and beats Kofi down in the corner. Big E. pulls out a table but D-Von throws Woods inside. The distraction lets Kofi grab a rollup with tights for the pin at 1:17.

New Day runs off with the table.

We recap Dolph Ziggler giving Summer a present on Raw. Brennan says it was a pair of earrings, which wasn’t clear on Raw.

Recap of Nikki retaining the title via DQ on Monday, thereby breaking the record.

Team Bella is preparing for the Bellabration. They have 298 bottles of champagne ready for them. Nikki is proud that Kim and Kanye are coming but there needs to be some non-alcoholic drinks for Kim. Brie and Alicia don’t seem pleased with her demands.

We recap the showdown between Reigns/Ambrose and the Wyatts on Monday.

Big Show is on his way to the ring for a match when Miz hands him a notebook with something inside. Show looks at whatever is in there, gets annoyed, and throws the book away.

Cesaro vs. Big Show

Cesaro hits a pair of quick dropkicks to knock Show into the corner but Show chops him back down. Another chop is countered into an armbreaker over the ropes in a unique idea. Cesaro starts cranking the arm across his shoulder but Show throws him down to take over again. Show stands on the knee against the ropes as Booker talks about his Top Five. I’ve missed that thing, though I have no idea why. We hit a leg lock on Cesaro (think an ankle lock but with Show’s arms around the shin and knee instead of the ankle and foot) but he quickly rolls out.

The uppercuts in the corner stagger Show and a high cross body gets two. Another running uppercut to a kneeling Show gets the same and Cesaro tries the Crossface while Show is on his knees. Booker thinks it’s an abdominal stretch because he’s not very smart on commentary. The Neutralizer is countered as Cesaro flips out of a backdrop but he tweaks his knee on the landing. Show KO’s Cesaro for the pin at 5:54.

Rating: C+. I liked this more than I was expecting to but the ending hurts it a bit. I guess it’s time to make Big Show look good before he gets squashed by Brock Lesnar in Madison Square Garden because we’re supposed to forget Brock mauling him at the Royal Rumble last year. Oh and well done on making sure Cesaro’s push is stopped cold, because there was no one else that could do this job.

Renee Young, in a leather jacket, asks Ambrose and Reigns who their partner is on Sunday. Reigns says they have a partner but they can’t say because they know Bray will be on him. Whoever it is, it was Dean’s idea. They’re ready to get momentum tonight before going to war on Sunday.

Kevin Owens vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler attacks with right hands to start but eats a big forearm to the face. Kevin avoids a dropkick and hits his backsplash for two. It’s already time for the trash talking, followed by countering Dolph’s running DDT into a regular one. We take a break and come back with Ziggler sidestepping a charge to send Owens into the post. A bunch of clotheslines set up the big elbow for two on Owens as they’re not exactly doing anything beyond basics here.

Now the running DDT gets two more and Owens stumbles out to the floor. Ziggler tries to slide to the floor after him but gets caught in a fall away slam into the barricade. Owens throws him into the timekeeper’s area for a nine count with Ziggler diving in before ten. Kevin superkicks him back to the floor and loads up the apron bomb but here’s Ryback for the DQ at 11:07.

Rating: D+. I was bored for the most part here and the ending didn’t help things. They were just doing the basics here and that’s not really enough to get me interested in a match. I’m glad to see Owens win again though while Ziggler doesn’t get pinned, proving that you can protect both guys and not have them limping into their pay per view matches. Good booking to a lame match.

No one has shown up to the Bellabration.

Connor’s Cure video.

Nikki tries to have the Bellabration but no one has shown up. Brie and Fox go off to fix it when Team PCB comes in. Charlotte talks some smack but the three leave without doing anything. Adam Rose, now in glasses, comes in and rips on the party. Nikki throws her cake and hits Brie and Fox. This was even less entertaining than it sounds.

Summer comes up to a tired Dolph and asks about the earrings. He tells her that sometimes a rose is just a rose, but sometimes it means more. Summer is confused.

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose vs. Sheamus/Seth Rollins

Rollins and Ambrose get things going but do nothing before Sheamus gets the tag. We have to wait some more though as Sheamus rolls outside to yell at the fans for calling him stupid. He’s very sensitive you see. Dean finally gets to punch Sheamus a few times before it’s off to Roman for more of the same. Reigns sends Rollins to the floor and the Shield guys stand tall as we take a break.

Back with Seth holding Ambrose in a chinlock, followed by a belly to back suplex backbreaker for two. Sheamus comes in for a suplex into a slam and a lot of trash talking. It’s back to Seth for a lot of stomping as Seth and Sheamus don’t seem thrilled with tagging in and out. Off to an Irish chinlock until Dean fights up and takes Sheamus to the floor with a hurricanrana. The hot tag brings in Reigns to clean house and it’s time for all those clotheslines. Seth escapes a powerslam but his low superkick is countered into a rollup.

That’s not enough for Reigns as he lifts Seth up into a powerbomb The threat of a Superman Punch sends Seth to the apron but he comes back in with a chop block and the low superkick. Sheamus reaches out for a tag but drops down to the floor instead. Seth grabs the briefcase but tags Sheamus in anyway. Sheamus takes the case right back, only to eat the suicide dive from Ambrose. Back in and the Superman punch and Dirty Deeds give Ambrose the pin at 16:51.

Rating: C. This was your standard main event tag as they continue to try to build up towards the six man on Sunday. It should be interesting to see who the partner is, but I have a bad feeling it’s going to be Kane, because we need more Kane in our lives you see. Not a bad match though and Sheamus vs. Rollins is an interesting tease, though I don’t think it’s going anywhere.

Post match a Wyatt video pops up showing the destruction of Orton and Jimmy Uso. Bray and company come on screen to ask who would be foolish enough to join the fight on Sunday. Not that it matters as they will all fall down.

Overall Rating: C. Well let’s see. The promos were mediocre. The wrestling was mediocre. The build to Sunday was mediocre. What else can I do here other than call it an average show? It’s the standard Smackdown: it’s a decent enough way to kill two hours but you wouldn’t miss a thing if you didn’t see it. I’ve never been one to say that Smackdown should be canceled, but if this is all they can do with it, there’s no need to have Smackdown around.

Results

Sasha Banks/Naomi b. Paige/Becky Lynch – Small package to Paige

Kofi Kingston b. D-Von Dudley – Rollup with a handful of tights

Big Show b. Cesaro – KO Punch

Kevin Owens b. Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Ryback interfered

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. Sheamus/Seth Rollins – Dirty Deeds to Sheamus

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Monday Night Raw – September 14, 2015: Dance Fever And Scorpion Double Shots

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 14, 2015
Location FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield

Tonight is the season premier, as WWE throws whatever it can at Monday Night Football to try and not get completely decimated in the ratings. The big match tonight is Charlotte challenging Nikki Bella for the Divas Title in Nikki’s first televised title defense in about two and a half months. Let’s get to it.

We open with a full recap of the statue story because just having Cole explain it in fifteen seconds would be too complicated.

Here’s the Authority walking down the ramp, which now has a Connor’s Cure logo. HHH and Stephanie talk about all the new talent that have showed up in the last year and a half. That group will lead the WWE into the new generation, which will be lead by Seth Rollins. HHH explains the double title defense on Sunday and that’s about it for Seth right now.

Stephanie explains the Divas Title situation and talks about how the Revolution has rocked everything. HHH has a major announcement for tonight: Sting will be wrestling his first match ever on Raw as he faces the Big Show. Stephanie introduces New Day for their title defense and the Authority dances with them.

So wait. They announced New Day vs. the Prime Time Players and the Divas Title in advance, but STING wrestling on Raw is announced with a few hours notice? These decisions continue to amaze me every single week, but at least they made sure to get Stephanie dancing to New Day’s entrance because she’s fun and cool that way. HHH dances a bit too.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Prime Time Players

New Day is defending with Woods on the floor as usual. Darren rolls Kofi up for a quick two before it’s off to Titus for a slam on Big E. We see the Dudleyz looking on as E. comes back with a belly to belly, meaning it’s time for some trombone playing. Back to the starters with Darren escaping the SOS and loading up the Gut Check, only to have Kofi tag out to Big E. The big guy sends Young into the post and it’s time for the rotating stomps, accompanied by more tromboning as we take a break.

Back with New Day still in control and Woods tormenting him with the trombone. Titus comes after them but gets called back by the referee. Woods: “DO NOT TOUCH MY TROMBONE!” Back in and Kofi snaps Darren’s throat across the top rope but he dives into some raised boots. Titus comes in off the tag to clean house and gives Kofi three straight backbreakers. A powerslam gets two on Big E. but Kofi gives Darren Trouble in Paradise on the floor. Woods offers a distraction and gets his trombone broken up, allowing the Midnight Hour to take Titus out for the pin at 12:15.

Rating: C. This was fine and a good way to set up New Day vs. the Dudleyz on Sunday. The Players have had their moment in the sun and it’s time to move on to a more interesting team. Darren and Titus are fine for a midcard team, but I don’t think anyone really bought them as a long term threat, which means they’re left as a nice role team.

New Day celebrates but the Dudleyz come out for a staredown.

Video of Sting at Starrcade 1988, part of a series of clips of his career. Pay no attention to the fact that that was a pretty worthless match.

Seth Rollins comes in to see the Authority and after praising the dance moves, he’s told to worry about Sunday. They do the New Day clap and that’s about it. This is another good example of a segment that didn’t need to be there.

We recap Charlotte making Nikki tap in a brawl last week.

Charlotte and Ric Flair are ready for the title match tonight and Ric praises the Divas division. They’re doing a great job of making this feel like a big deal.

Paige vs. Sasha Banks

It’s just Becky at ringside while Naomi and Tamina are out with Banks. Sasha snaps Paige’s arm across the middle rope to start and bends it around to put Paige in early trouble. Banks stomps on the arm in the corner instead of dropping the double knees before putting on an armbar.

Paige comes back with a knee in the corner and some kicks to the face for two as the announcers debate women’s tennis in an attempt to tie it into the Divas Revolution. A wicked German suplex sends Sasha down onto the back of her head and out to the floor in a heap. Paige tries to dive off the apron but Tamina pulls Sasha away, sending Paige crashing down as well. Back in and the Bank Statement puts Paige away at 5:15.

Rating: C. The potential for a Paige heel turn would seem to make sense and there’s nothing wrong with a story that might be this obvious. Once this team thing is done they can actually get on to something else instead of just running around in circles like they have been for weeks. The match was fine with that German suplex looking awesome, but I’ve lost interest in seeing them fight four times in two weeks. As usual, the word overkill doesn’t exist in WWE’s world.

We recap the Wyatt Family taking out Jimmy Uso and Randy Orton last week.

Video on Connor’s Cure.

It’s time for MizTV with special guests the Wyatt Family. Miz tells them to sit down but Bray tells Miz to not sit because he’s not safe here. After assuring Bray that he’s not the partner at Hell in a Cell (yes Hell in a Cell), Miz tries to talk to Strowman but Braun doesn’t say a word. Bray gets right in Miz’s face and says they’re coming to Night of Champions to show that no matter who comes at them, they all fall down. Cue Reigns and Ambrose in the crowd with Dean beating up Miz for trying to talk. Bray sits down as the other four stare at each other. Reigns calls Wyatt out for the attacks last week and promises to make him pay.

If Wyatt really was the man, he could have beaten Roman one on one but he just can’t do it. A real man wouldn’t have to surround himself with monsters. Reigns and Ambrose have found a third man for Night of Champions and they’re ready to win. Everyone stares each other down and the camera cuts out. This would be much better if they didn’t go to the announcers, meaning they’re sitting there talking while the guys are still in the ring.

Clip of Sting winning his first World Title at Great American Bash 1990.

John Cena vs. Sheamus

Sheamus’ headlock doesn’t get that far so he elbows Cena in the face instead. John is thrown to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Sheamus dropping a top rope knee for two before slapping on a sleeper. Cena pops up and hits the ProtoBomb followed by the Shuffle. A tornado DDT gets two on Sheamus but he comes back with an Edgeucator.

Cena grabs the ropes so Sheamus busts out the ten forearms instead. We get the same sequence with Cena using the STF and hitting some forearms of his own. The AA is blocked and Sheamus ax handles Cena in the face to take over again. Cena breaks up the Brogue Kick with a hard clothesline but can’t follow up. A powerslam drops Cena again but he sidesteps the top rope shoulder. Sheamus charges but Cena powers him up into a powerbomb position, only to flip him over into an electric chair drop. Back up and Sheamus tries the Regal roll, only to have Cena roll over into the AA for the pin at 14:49.

Rating: B. Good match here and I believe the first time Cena has pinned Sheamus in a singles match on TV. This was harkening back to the days of the US Open Challenge (you know, all those weeks ago) and continues to show that Cena can work a very good match with anyone you throw out there against him. Good stuff here.

Here’s Ryback with something to say. It’s appropriate that we’re in Memphis because Kevin Owens seems to have him all shook up. Ryback does a little Elvis and the silence is so deafening that he has to acknowledge it. As he starts to talk about Kevin Owens not being a real man, Owens cuts him off. Owens comes out with a copy of The Secret, which Ryback has credited with his rise to success.

He calls the book a joke and throws it to the floor while calling it a travesty that Ryback is the Intercontinental Champion. Ryback talks about how positive he is and how he fell on his face after rocketing to the top of the company. Owens says he’d take the title the first chance he got, so Ryback offers him a shot at Night of Champions. Kevin leaves without accepting. I really like the idea of these two fighting, but Ryback crediting his success to a book really doesn’t hold up for me.

The next Sting clip is Starrcade 1997, which is possibly the bullet that they never could recover from.

Stardust vs. Neville

The Lucha Dragons come out with Nevilel to counteract the Ascension. It’s a huge brawl to start with the Dragons diving through the ropes to take Ascension out. Neville hurricanranas Stardust to the floor but Ascension drags him away before Neville can dive. No match.

Nikki Bella video where she takes credit for the Divas Revolution. This was…..bad. Yeah that’s the only way to put it. It was bad.

Divas Title: Charlotte vs. Nikki Bella

Nikki is defending in case that’s not really clear. Charlotte takes her down to the mat and drops some knees. The figure four neck lock lets Charlotte rolls Nikki around the ring and tell her to bring it on. Nikki comes back by snapping Charlotte’s arm across the top rope and wringing it down onto the apron as we take a break.

Back with Nikki staying on the arm but Charlotte lifts her out of an armbar into a powerbomb to break it up. A big boot gets two for Charlotte but a dropkick to the shoulder gets the same for the champ. Charlotte scores with the spear but Alicia gets on the apron for a distraction. It’s Twin Magic time and Charlotte rolls Brie up for the pin at 10:02.

I’m not even going to bother rating it yet because here’s Stephanie to say that doesn’t count and Charlotte wins by DQ. Charlotte gets her rematch on Sunday and the title can change hands by any means.

Rating: C-. Well that happened. The match was nothing special but I’m sure we’ll hear for weeks about how awesome it was as the NXT fans point to Sasha vs. Bayley. You had to know they were going with the record because this is all about making the Bellas into some kind of pop culture icon in WWE’s mind and they just had to get her the record, which is totally better than Trish holding the Women’s Title for over a year because reasons.

Sting was at Survivor Series 2014.

Cesaro vs. Rusev

Rusev grabs a wristlock to start but Cesaro does four or five nipups in a row to escape. A headscissors drops Rusev again and the delayed vertical suplex gets one. Rusev’s spinwheel kick gets two but here’s Dolph Ziggler with a present for Summer. The distraction lets Cesaro small package Rusev for the pin at 4:04.

Rating: C-. The booking here was a lot better as you had Cesaro get a win while Ziggler gets to cost Rusev a match. Everyone comes out looking the way they’re supposed to look and Sunday’s match gets some build. That’s the kind of smart booking that WWE lacks so often and it’s a nice touch.

Ziggler superkicks Rusev and Summer sneaks the present with her as they leave.

WWE was at a children’s hospital earlier today.

Post break Rusev is livid and goes into his dressing room. Summer opens the present and it’s……something we can’t see.

Recap of the Tag Team Title match and we run down the Night of Champions card. Owens vs. Ryback for the Intercontinental Title is confirmed, as is Neville/Lucha Dragons vs. Stardust/Ascension on the preshow.

Big Show promises the Authority that he’ll knock Sting out.

Sting vs. Big Show

These two headlined Slamboree 1996 nearly twenty years ago. The Authority is ringside to watch. Sting hammers away to start and gets in ten right hands in the corner. Show tries a chokeslam out of the corner but gets DDT’d down instead. There’s the Stinger Splash but Rollins runs in for the DQ at 1:45.

Cena comes out for the save and HHH makes it a tag match.

Sting/John Cena vs. Seth Rollins/Big Show

This is joined in progress after a break with Cena’s shoulder block bouncing off Big Show. It’s off to Rollins for some stomping but Cena backdrops him over the top to the floor for a big crash. Back in and Cena tries the AA but can’t flip Show over, meaning the beating continues. Rollins and Big Show take turns beating on Cena while they both break up the tag attempts. The slow motion Vader Bomb gets two.

Cena turns Rollins inside out with a running clothesline but Show breaks up another hot tag attempt. Show misses the second Vader Bomb though and Cena dives over for the hot tag to Sting. It’s showtime as Sting cleans house, only to be run over by Big Show. The giant takes the AA and Sting breaks up the Pedigree with a Scorpion Death Drop. The Scorpion Deathlock makes Rollins tap at 11:58.

Rating: C-. I don’t like the ending but I get the idea. Sting isn’t going to win the title on Sunday but it’s still cool to see him in the ring on Raw, just for the novelty of it if nothing else. This could be another stake in HHH and Rollins’ relationship as Rollins couldn’t beat the man that HHH could, but they’ve been teasing the split for months now so I’ll believe it when I see it.

Overall Rating: C+. This was FAR better than last week as you could feel an energy instead of the same boring show they did last week. It was also a good go home show for Night of Champions, which is looking like a pretty fun card on paper. I’m curious to see where some of the stuff goes and that’s exactly what this show was supposed to accomplish. You had some big moments and a good match here so what else more can you ask for out of a TV show? Well done this week.

Results

New Day b. Prime Time Players – Midnight Hour to O’Neil

Sasha Banks b. Paige – Bank Statement

John Cena b. Sheamus – Attitude Adjustment

Charlotte b. Nikki Bella via DQ when Brie Bella interfered

Cesaro b. Rusev – Small package

Sting b. Big Show via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

Sting/John Cena b. Big Show/Seth Rollins – Scorpion Deathlock to Rollins

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: August 31, 2015

So…..yeah I’ve missed these for a few weeks. I know I missed the week before this but it’s a stretch to do one of these for this show and going back another week would be even worse. Anyway, it’s eight days after Summerslam and Sting is back to go after Seth Rollins, despite having losing his only match in the company. Let’s get to it.

We opened with Sting and that still doesn’t feel right in WWE. Sting was out there to talk about Rollins, but this somehow turned into a love fest for HHH. His speech was about how losing to HHH (who hit him in the head with a sledgehammer) earned his respect and Rollins will never be half the man that HHH is. Sting is going to prove that Rollins hasn’t earned the respect that he’s claiming, which is Sting’s entire character in a nutshell.

In other words, this feud is now going to be about HHH, because it sets up the feud with HHH vs. Rollins, which has been coming for months now it seems. I like the idea, but it would be a bit nicer if these were shades of gray instead of just making it clear that this is where the feud is going. I’m still not sure if Sting wins the title or not, though they seem to be making it a bit too clear that Sheamus is cashing in. I know WWE likes to beat things over our heads because they think we’re idiots, but this is almost too obvious. Therefore, I’m thinking Rollins retains over Sting, which almost guarantees that Sting gets the belt.

Rollins wanted his statue so Stephanie made sure to praise HHH a bit (made sense here for a change) before telling him to go ask Sting. This would be another segment that really didn’t change anything but why bother with something like that?

Rusev and Ziggler had a long match that ended in a DQ because this is destined to end in a mixed tag. Well at least it was. Now the interesting part here was where this went for the rest of the night, as Summer would be seen sneaking into Ziggler locker room before then running off screaming as Ziggler came out mostly sans clothing.

This got us into a soap opera which has been going ever since and I hate to admit the fact that I’m kind of loving it. Above all else: they’ve given me a reason to care. There’s a story here that is so over the top and ridiculous that it’s hard not to get sucked in, even though I know it’s bad. It helps that Rusev is left playing the role of muscle while everyone else does the drama, which is a much better fit for him. Well done all around Well that and Lana’s new outfit. That’s kind of a big plus too.

The best thing about this story though is I’m not sure if Ziggler cheated on Lana or not. Granted it’s about as low stake as you can get, but there’s always something good about not knowing where a story is going. It could be either ending here, though hopefully it ends with Ziggler going full on heel again because Dolph being noble and loyal to Lana doesn’t fit him in the slightest.

One of the other big stories of the night was Team PCB having a Beat the Clock Challenge for the right to face Nikki Bella for the title at Night of Champions. Charlotte wound up winning in something not really surprising, but I lost almost all interest in the Divas division (yeah it’s not a revolution, no matter how many times they’ve hammered it into our head that it’s a revolution) after the last month wasting our time. The matches were nothing special because of how short the time was, but at least we’re FINALLY getting to the title hunt, even if it means we have to listen to Nikki talk about being some empowered woman or whatever.

Ryback beat Big Show in a short match thanks to Miz, which seems to be the blowoff for this feud. I can’t say I’m complaining as I really didn’t need to see these three fight any longer. Big Show still seems to want to go after Miz, but at least they can’t be fighting over a title anytime soon. The match was short and a way for Ryback to show off his power, which he’s done about a dozen times on Big Show, which is why the company thinks it’s so impressive.

Kevin Owens beat Cesaro in a really good Summerslam rematch where Owens knocked him ribs first into the announcers’ table to injure Cesaro’s ribs. This was a good win for Owens and wraps up their feud, unfortunately with Cesaro getting swept but fortunately with no rubber match that WWE loves to put on. Owens seems primed for a shot at the Intercontinental Title and that’s a great spot for him right now, whether he wins the title or not.

Braun Strowman squashed Dean Ambrose, which is the best thing that he could have done for his first official match. The guy is a monster and he can tear a path of destruction for a few months until someone finally knocks him off. Just don’t make it obvious that he’s going to eventually be knocked off and everything will be fine.

The Dudleyz beat New Day in a non-title match because they have to have a champion lose once every few weeks, just to keep them interesting you see. Also because they don’t have any other teams to beat down besides the ones with the titles. More on that next week.

The big segment to end the show had Rollins demanding his statue back but being told by the Authority that he has to defend both titles at Night of Champions. Stephanie talked a lot but I usually get lost when she talks because all I can hear are buzzwords and charities that I’ll never hear of again because Stephanie has moved on to something else for her cause of the month. She does quite a few charity bits no?

Overall, Raw was a really solid show this week with almost everything serving a purpose or at least being good. Night of Champions is looking like an awesome show instead of the filler show that it so often is. We’re still waiting on that statue to be destroyed but I’m sure it’s going down soon enough. Good week this time though as they’re actually hot right now.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown – August 27, 2015: The Dog Days Of Smackdown

Smackdown
Date: August 27, 2015
Location: Dunkin’ Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jimmy Uso, Rich Brennan

It’s hard to say what’s going to happen tonight as the big story coming out of Raw is the return of Sting, who I can’t imagine is going to be here tonight. There’s always a chance of some fresh Wyatt Family stuff, as this show has become the main ground for the Shield vs. Wyatts feud, which isn’t the worst thing in the world. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We open with a clip of the Dudley Boyz returning on Monday.

Here are the Wyatts with something to say. Shocking I know. Harper talks about our eyes and ears being shut by the lies we’ve been told. We’re all dead and we don’t even know it but Bray Wyatt’s truth will give us new life. Bray says he doesn’t just throw out words like brother because family means everything to him. Sister Abigail has given him so much in this life and just when he thought he had nothing left, she provided him a savior. That’s what being a family is all about. Abigail’s eyes light up when she talks about Braun Strowman and now it is time.

Cue Reigns and Ambrose with the former saying it is what it is. That wasn’t the first time they’ve been whipped so if he and Dean are going down, they’re going down swinging. Ambrose: “I’ll take the ugly one.” There are always points in a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles line, intentional or not. Strowman is ready to go but Bray calls his men off and leaves.

Ascension vs. Dudley Boyz

Bubba takes Konor into the corner to start and asks if he knows who they are. D-Von comes in and runs Konor over but gets kicked down into the corner. It’s quickly back to Bubba for the Flip Flop and Fly, followed by What’s Up. Bubba calls for the tables but Konor breaks it up. The attempt, not the table. Back in and Ascension gets in a little offense, including a jumping knee to Bubba’s face. Not that it matters as a quick clothesline allows the hot tag to D-Von for some house cleaning. Bubba comes back in off a blind tag and 3D ends Konor at 5:10.

Rating: C-. This was fine and just a way for the Dudleys to show that they’re back. There’s nothing wrong with running through your old standards before they come back with the bigger stuff later on, especially considering they’re probably going to get a title shot at Night of Champions.

Post match it’s table time but New Day comes out with signs, including “Save a table, break a Dudley” and “hashtag give tables a chance.” Viktor gets powerbombed through the table and New Day panics.

Neville vs. Kevin Owens

This could be good. The threat of a kick to the head sends Owens into the corner and a headscissors puts him on the floor. Neville misses a baseball slide though and Owens blasts him with a clothesline. Back in and a torture rack neckbreaker (cool move) gets two for Kevin and we take a break.

We come back with Neville fighting out of a chinlock and striking away, followed by a missile dropkick for two. The German suplex sends Owens to the floor but this time Neville is smart enough to duck the clothesline. Instead it’s a superkick to set up the Red Arrow but Owens rolls away before it can launch. The Pop Up Powerbomb ends Neville at 8:19.

Rating: C+. The match was fun while it lasted but there’s only so much they can do with less than five minutes of the match actually airing. It’s nice to see Owens getting back to back wins, but I’m worried about where Neville is going. There’s only so much he can do, but the hero character could take them somewhere.

The Bellas get catty with Team PCB over Paige being the leader but never showing up because of Tough Enough. A tag match is set up for later. High school style drama: empowering women around the world.

Bella Twins vs. Becky Lynch/Charlotte

Team BAD is on commentary because Heaven forbid all of these teams aren’t in the same place at the same time. Jimmy has recused himself from commentary to avoid a personal conflict. Nikki and Charlotte get things going as BAD rips on the Bellas for their singing on Total Divas. As usual, I love that something that happened two and a half months ago on Total Divas (some of it happened backstage at Battleground) is never mentioned until after the show aired.

A double dropkick puts Nikki down so it’s off to Brie, who gets her head slammed onto the mat. Back to Charlotte who misses a knee to give Brie a target and one of her kicks actually connects for a change. A leg lock doesn’t get Brie anywhere so Charlotte kicks her out to the floor. Everything breaks down as Nikki pulls Becky off the apron, leaving Charlotte to roll Brie up in the Charlotte’s Web for the pin at 3:15.

Rating: D+. I’m sure this means the Bellas are mortal and PCB has the momentum now or something, even though there still seems to be no advancement in this story. The Divas Revolution continues to be nothing more than a way to drag new Divas in so the Bellas can have fresh names to go over in the end. I had some hope that things would turn around with Summerslam ending but the first week is the same as all the previous ones: meaningless matches taking place while Nikki gets closer to the record.

Here’s Seth Rollins to address what happened on Raw. This Monday was supposed to take him from legendary to immortal. He mentions cashing in at Wrestlemania and being the first man to hold both titles at once (save for Goldberg, whose titles don’t count I guess because all those titles being unified only counts when they want it to. I like it better this way though as the idea of the World Heavyweight Championship being the NWA/WCW Title was one of the most ridiculous things even WWE had ever tried to pass off). Actors should be fighting to play him in his biopic.

Here’s a clip of Sting’s unveiling and subsequent beating. Rollins brags about being on top of the mountain while Sting has spent years down in the minor leagues. So why does Sting think he can ruin Seth’s moment without provocation? Rollins is going to finish what HHH started at Wrestlemania when the Architect faces the Artifact.

This got better as Rollins kept going but that’s the problem: it felt like he was still going for the sake of going, not because he had anything else to say. That’s a major problem with so many WWE promos: they’re designed as one size fits all, but not everyone speaks the same. Look at this one for example. Rollins could have cut this in half and said the same thing. Orton is the same way. He has to talk forever when it’s clear that he’s covered everything in a fraction of the time, but WWE has decided that this is how you do promos and everyone has to be the same.

Sheamus says he’ll kick Ambrose’s head off tonight.

Ryback/Dolph Ziggler vs. Rusev/Big Show

Big Show throws Ryback around to start but Ryback kicks away in the corner. Something like a spear puts Ryback down up against the ropes. The chokeslam doesn’t work so Ryback shoulders Show down. That wasn’t a bad power sequence. Show runs him over in turn but Rusev tags himself in, much to Show’s annoyance, and we take a break. Back with Rusev dropping elbows on Ryback and ignoring Show’s requests for a tag. Rusev: “I don’t trust you giant!”

Ziggler gets knocked off the apron but the distraction lets Ryback score with a spinebuster. Off to Ziggler vs. Big Show and the giant gets put down with the swinging DDT. A superkick gets two but the Fameasser is countered into the Alley-Oop and the KO Punch knocks Dolph out. Rusev tags himself in though and slaps on the Accolade, only to have Show KO his partner. Show walks past the black hole that Ryback has fallen into as Ziggler covers Rusev for the pin at 10:16.

Rating: C-. So I guess Big Show is a face again. That guy turns more often than I have to change the oil in my car so he must have been overdue. Big Show vs. Rusev does nothing for me, but I think I’d rather see that instead of forcing myself through another Lana/Ziggler love fest.

Clips of the end of Undertaker vs. Lesnar and Brock leaving Bo in a heap on Monday.

Video on Jon Stewart screwing John Cena at Summerslam and Monday’s fallout.

Ambrose and Reigns try to figure out what Sheamus means by respect the hawk. Sheamus better learn to respect Dean’s fist and his boot. Reigns will take care of the Wyatts.

Sheamus vs. Dean Ambrose

Now I know the Wyatts are either going to run in to end the match or just after it’s over, but how refreshing is it to not have Dean fighting one of them for a change? Ambrose vs. Sheamus isn’t the most thrilling match in the world, but I’ll take it over Dean vs. Wyatt or Harper again.

Sheamus takes over to start and dumps Dean to the floor to turn it into a brawl. Dean comes right back by throwing him inside for a clothesline to take it back to the floor, only to be sent into the barricade as we go to a break. Back with Sheamus kneeing him down onto the apron and slamming him out of a suplex. The Brock Lock doesn’t make Dean tap out so he pulls himself up, only to get planted with a sitout powerbomb.

Six forearms to the chest have Dean in even more trouble but he gets in some forearms to Sheamus’ chest to even things out a bit. A big clothesline drops Sheamus and Dean is all fired up. The bulldog out of the corner sets up la majistral of all things to give Ambrose two. Dean’s suicide dive connects and another big clothesline knocks Sheamus silly. Of course we’ve got Wyatts and the distraction sets up the Brogue Kick for the pin at 11:31.

Rating: C+. I liked this more than I was expecting to because they didn’t try to make this a wrestling match. Just let these two beat each other up for about ten minutes and then let the rest take care of itself. The Wyatts were the obvious ending but at least Sheamus isn’t being treated like a loser for a change.

Post match Reigns comes out for the save and is smart enough to Superman Punch Harper as fast as he can. Strowman is waiting for him though and Roman’s right hands have almost no effect. Braun slams him face first into the mat and chokes Reigns out, leaving the Wyatts posing to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Standard Smackdown fare here with almost nothing interesting or worth seeing. The ending to the show was the same as when Strowman debuted on Monday and Show is still having issues with Rusev. It’s back to normal with two hours of talking, average matches and nothing that won’t be done on a bigger stage in four days.

Results

Dudley Boyz b. Ascension – 3D to Konor

Kevin Owens b. Neville – Pop Up Powerbomb

Charlotte/Becky Lynch b. Bella Twins – Charlotte’s Web to Brie

Dolph Ziggler/Ryback b. Rusev/Big Show – Ziggler pinned Rusev after a KO Punch

Sheamus b. Dean Ambrose – Brogue Kick

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Summerslam Count-Up – 2012: HHH Is Sorry

Summerslam 2012
Date: August 19, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,205
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

The main story here is Brock Lesnar is back, having returned the night after Wrestlemania to start a feud with John Cena. That feud lasted for a month before Lesnar started going after HHH. It wasn’t until three months later, as in tonight, that they’re having their showdown. Other than that we have Punk defending the title against Big Show and Cena and Sheamus defending against Del Rio. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: Antonio Cesaro vs. Santino Marella

This is one of those ideas that was brought back after far too many years off. Santino is defending and Cesaro has his HORRID dance music here. He also has Aksana who isn’t horrid at all, other than in the ring of course. Cesaro’s word of the day in five languages: greatness. Santino does the power walk to the ring and is as goofy as ever. Cesaro takes it to the mat but Santino actually spins out for two.

A judo throw puts Cesaro down before Santino power walks out of an Irish whip. Must resist country jokes. Santino avoids a charge in the corner and loads up the Cobra but Cesaro takes his head off from behind. The Cobra goes to the floor and Aksana throws it away. Off to a reverse chinlock with Cesaro pulling on Marella’s ears to keep him away from the Cobra. IT’S A FREAKING SOCK! I know Foley used one too but it didn’t seem to have magical powers.

Santino kicks Cesaro away but still can’t get the sock. The gutwrench suplex gets no cover from the challenger, as he would rather rip the Cobra to shreds. Santino pounds away but misses the headbutt. He counters the Neutralizer and pulls out another Cobra, proving THAT IT’S JUST A FREAKING SOCK! Aksana gets on the apron and the Cobra wants her, allowing Cesaro to hit the Neutralizer for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. IT’S A FREAKING SOCK! Match was ok but the majority of the five minutes were spent on Santino trying to put a sock on his hand so he can use a neck attack taught to him by John Lovitz. I know he’s a comedy character but there’s a point where it’s stupid rather than funny. Santino half crossed that line years ago.

The opening video talks about the twenty five years of Summerslam, meaning we’ll have to hear about how this is the 25th anniversary. The video is interrupted by talk of a storm called Brock Lesnar, which to be fair is the main draw of the show.

Jerry and Cole’s intro is cut off by Vickie’s screeching intro of Ziggler.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Chris Jericho

Dolph is Mr. MITB here and Jericho is freshly face after Ziggler accused him of going soft. Jericho has taped up ribs from an attack at Ziggler’s hands. The fans LOVE Chris and things start fast with the Canadian hitting the jumping back elbow to the jaw. Jericho slips out of the corner on a spinning clothesline but Ziggler escapes a suplex and kicks him in the ribs to take over. Dolph stays on the ribs for a quick two but gets backdropped out to the floor.

Chris’ springboard dive misses as Ziggler casually ducks, sending Jericho crashing to the floor. Ziggler hooks on a chinlock with a bodyscissors to stay on the ribs. A knee to the head gets two for Dolph and a neckbreaker, complete with hip swivel and ARROGANT COVER, gets two more.

Jericho gets a quick cradle for two but Ziggler takes him right back down with a clothesline. Dolph misses a Stinger Splash and Chris goes after him, only to be easily taken down by another shot to the ribs. Not that it matters as he pops up top for the ax handle but Ziggler kicks him in the ribs again. The Fameasser gets two but an enziguri puts Dolph down for two as well. Back and forth match so far here.

Dolph jumps over Chris in the corner and puts on the sleeper which looks horrid here. Jericho rams him into the corner to escape and rains down some right hands before snapping off a top rope hurricanrana. The ribs are damaged even more though, delaying the count by several seconds. A jumping DDT gets two on the Canadian and Ziggler is getting frustrated.

They slug it out with Jericho taking him down via the bulldog but the Lionsault hits knees. The Zig Zag gets two but Dolph can’t follow up. Instead he walks into the Codebreaker to send him to the floor. Jericho throws him in but gets tripped up by Vickie, allowing Ziggler to roll him up for two. Dolph misses a charge into the post and the Walls go on for the submission.

Rating: C+. The idea here was that Jericho couldn’t win the big one anymore. The problem here though is they would have a rematch tomorrow night with Jericho’s contract and Dolph’s case on the line. Why they didn’t have that match here is anyone’s guess but at least it was a good opener and the fans popped for the ending. They had some Shelton vs. HBK from 2005 in there with Jericho fighting a younger version of himself but using his maturity and experience to get the win.

Vickie freaks out over the loss.

We recap Brock breaking Shawn Michaels’ arm on Raw.

Heyman and Brock say Lesnar wins tonight.

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

It’s amazing that this team started less than a year ago. The fans are already chanting YES and Bryan says NO. It’s amazing how a chant this simple carried Bryan so far. This was set up by GM AJ as revenge against Bryan for jilting her or something. Bryan fires off kicks to start but walks into an uppercut to knock him back. Daniel moonsaults over Kane in the corner but gets kicked in the face to put him down. The low dropkick gets two for Kane but the fans are all behind Daniel.

Another big boot gets two but Bryan comes back with the kicks to the legs, only to be thrown over the top and out to the floor. Bryan slides back in and hits the FLYING GOAT to put Kane down. The missile dropkick drops Kane again and there are more kicks, only to have Kane clothesline his way out of trouble. The side slam gets two and the top rope clothesline looks to set up the chokeslam but Bryan bails to the floor.

Bryan slaps him in the face like a knucklehead, sending Kane through the roof. Bryan is tossed into the corner and stomped down by a furious Kane. The referee drags him away, allowing Bryan to try the NO Lock. Kane powers out so Bryan kicks him in the head. Why overcomplicate things? The flying headbutt is caught in the chokeslam but Kane wants the tombstone, allowing Bryan to counter into a small package for the pin.

Rating: C+. Good match here and you could see the anger management stuff coming. Kane had Bryan beat but wanted revenge and let Bryan catch him off guard. These two obviously had chemistry together and the story would be a big boost to Kane’s career. Also the original idea here was Bryan vs. Charlie Sheen somehow. Thankfully that was never mentioned again.

Kane is going nuts in the back. Josh Matthews comes up to him like the schnook he is and is LAUNCHED off camera in a funny bit.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and Mysterio is dressed like Batman. Rey grabs a quick rollup for two and the champion bails to the floor for a bit. AJ has promised to deal with Kane for attacking Matthews tomorrow on Raw. Miz throws Mysterio through the ropes to the floor but Rey rolls through to avoid pain. The champion sends him ribs first into the barricade to take over as this isn’t doing much for me so far.

Miz pulls on Rey’s face and puts on a chinlock before hitting something resembling Abyss’ Shock Treatment (torture rack backbreaker) for two. A boot to Rey’s head gets two and it’s off to a cravate for a bit. Miz hits the corner clothesline but spends too much time laughing at the crowd, allowing Rey to crotch him on the top.

Rey’s seated senton is rolled through into a slingshot sitout powerbomb for two from Miz. Rey comes back with a tornado DDT for the same result and a top rope hurricanrana sends Miz into the 619 position. The kick to the face connects but Rey misses the top rope splash. The Skull Crushing Finale is countered into a cradle for a hot two count. A second attempt at the Finale works though to retain Miz’s title.

Rating: C-. This took a long time to get going but it had a few nice moments at the end. Both of these guys fell so far in just a year as both guys were fighting for the world title just a year ago. The match wasn’t bad but it didn’t do much for me. It was one of those matches that came and went and I won’t think about it again an hour from now.

Teddy Long and Eve, the bosses of Smackdown, leave AJ’s office and seem to approve of what she’s doing. They leave and Punk goes in to find a smiling AJ. Punk doesn’t like the idea of being in a triple threat for the title tonight and thinks it’s happening as revenge for him rejecting AJ’s proposal. AJ just stares off into space and Punk accuses her of disrespecting him but she doesn’t move an inch.

We recap Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus. These two feuded FOREVER and Del Rio never did much of anything. He complained about Sheamus not being high class so Sheamus stole Del Rio’s car. Fake cops beat up Sheamus and that’s about it. It’s as boring of a feud as it sounds.

Smackdown World Title: Sheamus vs. Alberto Del Rio

Feeling out process to start with both guys tumbling out to the floor. Back in and Sheamus hits a quick neckbreaker and the rolling senton for two each. Sheamus puts him on the top rope for a belly to back superplex but Alberto gets onto Sheamus’ shoulder to escape. The buckle pad is pulled off in the process. Del Rio can’t hook the armbreaker so he kicks Sheamus out to the floor instead. Sheamus is sent knee first into the steps as the crowd is DEAD.

Back in and Del Rio hits a flying shoulder block for two before hooking the chinlock. A kick to the head gets two on the champion and we hit the chinlock. That goes nowhere so Del Rio mocks Sheamus’ chest pounding before the Brogue Kick, only to have Sheamus ax handle him in the head. Sheamus goes up but a kick to the let puts him down again. A kick to the arm gets two for Alberto and the armbreaker goes on, FINALLY waking the fans up.

Sheamus of course is barely phased by it and rolls onto Del Rio to break the pressure. He picks Alberto up into a kind of powerbomb to break the hold, earning himself a chant from the crowd. White Noise gets two and Sheamus avoids a charge in the corner, setting up the forearms in the ropes. Sheamus pounds down right hands in the corner but gets dropped face first onto the exposed buckle. The enziguri in the corner is good for two so Del Rio yells at Ricardo. Rodriguez throws in a shoe but Sheamus intercepts it to knock Ricardo out cold. The Irish Curse hits for the pin, ignoring Del Rio’s foot being on the rope. REMATCH!

Rating: D+. The match was decent but it never felt like Sheamus was in any real danger. The drop onto the exposed buckle and the enziguri got a near fall, but it didn’t feel like a close near fall; It felt like it was there because this is where we’re supposed to have a dramatic kick out if that makes sense. It’s not bad but this feud didn’t need to continue at all.

We hear about Mike Tyson and Piers Morgan having a Twitter war over the main event. I’ve got nothing.

We get a clip from the pre show where HHH tells the referee that the match isn’t ending on a countout or a DQ.

Tag Titles: Prime Time Players vs. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth

I don’t remember Kofi and Truth being champions AT ALL. Truth and Young get us going as the fans chant Kobe Bryant, referencing the joke that got AW fires. Young is taken down by an armdrag and a legdrop gets two for Truth. Truth has to fight out of the corner but gets caught in the face by a big boot for two. Back up and Truth hits a great side kick to take Titus’ head off and get himself a breather. Off to Kofi to speed things up as the crowd still isn’t all that interested.

Kofi chops O’Neil down but a Young distraction lets the challengers take over. Titus clotheslines Kofi down for two before suplexing Young onto Kofi’s back for two. A snap powerslam gets the same for Darren and it’s back to Titus for an abdominal stretch. That goes nowhere so Titus loads up a spinout Rock Bottom, only to be pulled dowin into a DDT. Hot tag brings in Truth to clean house and everything breaks down. Titus is sent to the floor and caught by a Kofi dive, allowing Truth to hit Little Jimmy on Darren to retain the titles.

Rating: D+. This could have been on any given Raw. The Players are a decent team but Titus is clearly the star with Young just being there. Kofi and Truth are just transitional champions before HELL NO would take the championships a few weeks later. Nothing to see here other than a filler before we get to the main events.

Video on Summerslam Axxess.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Punk won the title at Survivor Series but got angry over Rock vs. Cena being announced as the main event of Wrestlemania 29 a year in advance. Cena cashed in the MITB case at Raw 1000 but Big Show cost Cena the match. AJ made it a three way for the sake of tormenting Punk (now a heel demanding respect) for turning down her proposal.

Punk’s complaints about how the title should be the focus and how he wasn’t getting respect are why his heel turn didn’t go well: those are logical points and heels aren’t supposed to be logical. WWE failing to get this is the source of a lot of their problems. Heels are supposed to be bullies or maniacal in their delusions, not making thought out rational points.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk vs. Big Show

Show knocks down both smaller guys as Cole talks about Punk not main eventing a show since December despite holding the title the entire time. Good point actually. The LOUD chop hits both Cena and Punk’s chests twice each with Big Show in total control. They finally work together but Show easily suplexes them both down. Cena is crushed in the corner, knocking him out to the floor so it’s Punk vs. Show one on one.

Punk wisely takes out the knee and fires off kicks to the chest as the fans are entirely behind him. The smart moves are canceled out though as Punk tries a GTS with the obvious result. Cena tries an AA but the powers of gravity take him down to the mat, crushing Cena’s head against the mat. Show chops Punk down in the corner and knocks Cena out to the floor. Punk avoids a splash but tries a springboard cross body like a schnook, earning that powerslam he gets.

The Final Cut puts Punk down but Cena breaks up the WMD, earning himself a spear from the giant for two. Show loads up a double Vader Bomb but only hits Cena, allowing Punk to springboard onto Show for the save. Everyone heads to the floor with Big Show chokeslamming Punk against the ropes, sending him back to the floor. Show drops Cena with a side slam but stares at the crowd instead of covering. Maybe someone was holding up a Twinkie?

Cena actually hits a belly to back suplex on Show and loads up the Shuffle, only to have Punk charge in for the save. The champion drops the Macho Elbow for two on Show but gets launched away. Since covering hasn’t worked, Punk puts on a modified Koji Clutch but Show easily powers out. The crowd has DIED for some reason. Cena comes back in and shoulders Show down, bringing them right back to life.

There’s the STF on Show but the big man stands up to break the hold. Punk comes in with a springboard clothesline to take Show down again, followed by three straight knees to the head in the corner. The bulldog is easily countered (of course) but Cena hits the top rope Fameasser to put the giant down.

We get a Koji Clutch/STF combo and Show taps, but we have no clear winner. This brings out AJ (Punk: “DO THE RIGHT THING LIKE SPIKE LEE! LET THE PEOPLE DECIDE! THEY CAN TWEET ABOUT IT!”) who eventually says restart the match, allowing Show to hit a double chokeslam for two on each guy. Cena ducks the WMD and hits the AA, but Punk throws him to the floor and steals the pin to retain.

Rating: C. The match was ok with the logical story but it was nothing we hadn’t seen before. The restart was pretty dumb as well as Big Show shouldn’t have had a chance to win the title after tapping out. Cena vs. Punk would continue for months which would make for some great matches, but this wasn’t anything special. Not bad at all though.

Various B level celebrities are here. Maria Menunos in a Bob Backlund shirt works very well.

Trailer for whatever WWE’s latest movie is at the point. The Day. Ok then.

We recap the pre-show match to fill in time.

Kevin Rudolf sings the theme song.

We recap the main event. Basically Lesnar tried to hold the company hostage by renaming Raw to Monday Night Raw Starring Brock Lesnar. HHH stood up to him and got a broken arm as a result. Lesnar F5’d Vince and injured him, making HHH come back as The Cerebral Assassin to face Lesnar. Brock responded by breaking Shawn Michaels’ arm as well. This was one of those feuds that people weren’t all that thrilled to see but it could have been worse. More on that later.

Brock Lesnar vs. HHH

Every time I watch a Brock Lesnar match I remember how scary of a human being he is. We get spotlights for the big match intros in a cool idea. Remember that HHH told the referee to allow a lot of fighting tonight. Lesnar powers HHH into the corner to start and goes for a standing kimura (arm lock that he used to break the arm) with a jumping body scissors. HHH though is a MAN and powers out of it before clotheslining Brock to the floor. Back in and Brock pounds away, only to be clotheslined to the floor again. You know, because Cena can be in a war with Brock at Extreme Rules but HHH can easily stop him.

Brock comes back in and takes the MMA gloves off before taking HHH down to the mat with an amateur move. They head outside with HHH shrugging off Brock’s attacks and pounding away, only to be dropped arm first onto the announce table. Lesnar eventually drags HHH back in for a hammerlock slam. Back to the standing kimura with Brock wrapping the arm around the ropes and ramming it into the corner.

A release German suplex puts HHH down again but he comes back with a neck snap across the ropes. Brock is taken down by a DDT but he goes right back to the kimura and another hammerlock slam. They head to the floor with the arm going into the steps and the rest of HHH going into the announce table. Brock jumps off the table onto the Game before taking him back inside. Of all things, Lesnar busts out a small package for a one count. A hard clothesline puts HHH down but he blocks a suplex into one of his own to get a breather.

Brock misses a charge into the corner but blocks a Pedigree and throws HHH out to the floor. HHH sends him into the announce table stomach first, which is a weak spot due to some real life past illnesses which ended his UFC career for all intents and purposes. More shots to the stomach have Brock in trouble and a knee to the ribs puts him down. Heyman is losing his mind and Brock is in trouble.

The spinebuster puts Brock down and there’s the Pedigree for two. A low blow puts HHH down and Heyman screams that this was HHH’s idea. The F5 is good for two and Brock is stunned. I have no idea why, as you know you can’t get a win off one finisher in WWE. Now the kimura goes on again with a bodyscissors but a rope break means nothing. Instead HHH pretty easily punches his way out of it and hits another Pedigree. Thankfully Brock no sells it and puts on the kimura, breaking the arm again and drawing the submission.

Rating: C+. The match is ok but it has one major flaw: it’s BORING. You don’t bring in Brock Lesnar to have him go toe to toe with HHH. You bring him in to have him destroy small cities and eat villagers. That’s the issue here. We went from Cena surviving against an insane Brock Lesnar to HHH having Brock in trouble in a dull match. Lesnar didn’t seem insane here at all and it made for a much less interesting match. Also, Cena won with a Hail Mary shot, where as HHH can slug it out with Lesnar? That just doesn’t hold up at all. Somehow this would be the high point, as this feud went on another TEN MONTHS.

Naturally HHH gets the big heroic stand up in the ring, but instead of people giving him a standing ovation they tell him that he tapped out. HHH stands there until people finally applaud him. He apologizes to the fans and slowly walks out. I guess this is supposed to be like Austin at Wrestlemania 13 but it’s just failing. The speculation is that HHH is leaving for good. If you bought that, raise your hand to show how gullible you are.

Overall Rating: C-. This is an interesting show as most of the matches are ok but nothing goes beyond that level. Most of this show would be classified as ok at best and uninteresting at worst. It’s just kind of there with nothing memorable other than HHH DEMANDING to give us his moment at the end. Nothing to see here and not worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

Antonio Cesaro vs. Santino Marella

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Chris Jericho vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Rey Mysterio vs. The Miz

Original: C

Redo: C-

Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus

Original: D

Redo: D+

R-Truth/Kofi Kingston vs. Prime Time Players

Original: C

Redo: D+

John Cena vs. CM Punk vs. Big Show

Original: C-

Redo: C

Brock Lesnar vs. HHH

Original: B

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: C-

It’s still boring.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/08/19/summerslam-2012-lesnar-is-a-wrestler-again-just-like-everyone-else/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, make sure to check out the Wrestling Bundle, which wraps up Sunday August 23 at midnight EST. Here are the details:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/08/16/the-wrestling-bundle/




Smackdown – August 20, 2015: Go Home, Go Home, Go Home

Smackdown
Date: August 20, 2015
Location: Resch Center Hall, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Jerry Lawler, Jimmy Uso

It’s the final show before Summerslam, meaning it’s time to find out how many times they can talk about Brock vs. Undertaker in about an hour and a half. It’s going to be a mixture of matches getting the hype this week as the main event is an eight man tag with three feuds being combined into one match. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Ryback vs. Big Show

Non-title and yes they’re actually starting with a match for a change. Ryback punches away to start but Show drops him with a clothesline. They seem to be going with the “hit each other really hard” formula tonight. Phillips starts listing off the odds for Sunday’s title match, because the fans aren’t smart enough to divide by three. A side slam puts Ryback down and Show hits the chinlock. Miz told Lawler the following sage wisdom: “Size means nothing. The whale is an endangered species but the ant is doing just fine.” That’s one of those bizarre statements that works, which makes it even more disturbing.

Ryback fights up and just runs Big Show over, much to the announcers’ delight. Something like a spinebuster puts Show down again (to be fair, he’s not the easiest guy to spinebust) but the Meat Hook is countered by a spear for a close two. Show actually dropkicks him to the floor but Ryback comes back with the Meat Hook to put them through that part of the barricade they always go through when they go through part of the barricade (Jimmy: “OH SNAP! OH SNAP!”). It’s a double countout at 4:14.

Rating: C+. They packed a lot into this and it’s fun to see someone like Ryback muscle Big Show around. I know it’s been done a million times, but it’s still an impressive display of strength. Also, well done on having them go to a draw instead of having one of them lose. I’ve never been a fan of having someone going into a title match losing, but that’s what they did with Miz on Raw. Hopefully that doesn’t mean he gets the title back though as Ryback is starting to put something together as champion.

It takes a bit to get everything cleaned up.

New Day vs. Los Matadores/El Torito

This is billed as a six being match because WWE is stupid that way. I could watch New Day’s entrance for hours, especially the look on Kofi’s face. Woods and Fernando get things going and Lawler is already making his lame old man short person jokes. A quick splash sends Woods into the corner for a tag to Kofi but Los Matadores double team him down with Diego’s neckbreaker getting two.

Lawler says he went to see the Lucha Dragons’ new movie: Dragon Ball Z. I would pay to see Lawler watch a Dragon Ball Z movie. The threat of Torito sends New Day to the floor and we take a break. Back with Woods charging into Diego’s elbow but making the tag off to Big E. Diego gets dropped face first on the top turnbuckle for two and it’s rotating stomp time.

Woods hits his running basement dropkick in the corner before it’s off to Kofi, who is sent face first into the post, allowing for the tag to Torito. This is the big showdown with Woods (Lawler: “It’s deja moo!”) and a rolling cradle gets two for the bull. Everything breaks down and Big E. runs the full sized masked guys over, leaving us with E. vs. Torito. A big backbreaker sets up the Warrior splash and Woods gets the pin at 9:09.

Rating: D+. This is WWE in a nutshell: lame puns, a six being match, and a full match built around a thirty second spot on Monday that no one really cared about because it might make someone backstage laugh. At least New Day won and we got the celebration after a watchable match, but the story just killed this for me.

Someone gives Woods flowers and the celebration is on in full.

Here are Ziggler and Lana for a chat. Ziggler talks about how good it feels to be back here…..with Lana. He’s been tired of spending six weeks on the shelf, eating his dinners through a straw. Ziggler wanted to be here to help Lana against Summer and Rusev, before he needed to find his Lana (his words) and see if she was ok. The first thing she said to him was they needed to crush those two. Ziggler: “THAT IS HOT!”

Lana thinks they make a great team because Ziggler always stands up for what he believes in and she shoved Summer into a fish. Dolph says Lana just wanted to prove how tough she was, which makes Lana giggle. Rusev can have his pathetic wannabe but only Dolph gets the real thing.

Cue the Rusev flag, quickly followed by Rusev and Summer. Rusev promises to crush Ziggler’s throat again and put him in the Accolade. Well that’s certainly efficient. He’ll let go before Ziggler passes out though so Dolph can see Summer crush Lana as well. That will be the end of his comeback, but Dolph says the comeback doesn’t even start until Summerslam when he kicks Rusev’s teeth down his throat and steals the real girlfriend. Didn’t he do that already?

This is one of those feuds where the rationale seems to have been “well, there’s nothing else for them to do”, which rarely makes for a good story. Ziggler’s thinking makes sense (“What am I supposed to do? Turn down the hot blonde trying to kiss me?”) but Lana feels so forced into this story.

It really doesn’t help that she had to just sit around and wait for Ziggler to come back from his movie as she’s lost all of her heat in this story. Yeah remember like three months ago when you heard all those WE WANT LANA chants? How long have those been gone? About as long as she’s been with Ziggler I believe? At least it’s not a mixed tag though.

Here’s a good chunk of Cena and Rollins’ exchange from Raw.

Neville vs. Bo Dallas

Dallas takes him into the corner for an elbow to the jaw and driving some knees into the back of the head. “BOLIEVE!” We hit the cravate on Neville but he pops up, kicks Bo in the head and ends this with the Red Arrow at 1:54. Neville is getting into that 1995 Randy Savage mode of only hitting one move, which isn’t a good sign for him going forward.

Stardust and Barrett pop up on screen and promise to win. Barrett: “On Sunday, red and green turn black and blue!” Stardust: “Yeah. He’s going to punch you!” Neville will be grounded by a royal Bullhammer so hail the Cosmic King and Stardust.

Team Bella comes out for a triple threat but it’s time for a chat first. Alicia introduces Nikki, who will hold the record in 26 days and represents fearlessness. Has that slogan ever been explained? I mean, what makes Nikki fearless? Nikki says she may be fearless but she has doubts too. This past Monday was her toughest challenge to date and Sasha didn’t disappoint. Maybe one day, Sasha will be an amazing Divas Champion, but that day isn’t today. Well of course not because she hasn’t gotten the record yet.

Nikki says that her title reign makes her the most powerful woman in sports entertainment. Oh yeah Stephanie is getting involved in this after Sunday. They’re proud of being part of what social media has dubbed the Divas Revolution. Oh come on. I know WWE has decided that social media is the greatest thing in the world but Cole has been calling it that name for a month now.

Cue Team BAD with Naomi saying that the Bellas don’t speak for the entire division and no one believes them. She advises them to not prepare a victory speech for Summerslam, “because it’s not going to happen boo.” Sasha talks some trash so Brie gives one of the worst deliveries I’ve ever heard as she says Sasha calls herself the Boss, but there’s a much better word for her that starts with a B. That line was clearly off a script and Brie just butchered it. Like, Ed Leslie levels of bad butchering.

Sasha brings up making Nikki tap on Raw (Nikki: “Still the champ!”) but switches to Brie, who has ridden her injured husband’s coattails for months now. Brie tells her to shove it instead of bank on it and violence is teased but here’s Team PCB to intercede. Well Team CB at least as Paige is at Tough Enough. Becky promises a lass kicking and we’re ready to go.

Before we get to the match, let’s talk about why this was such a bad segment at its core. Ignoring how bad some of the delivery was, you had pretty much the entire Divas’ division out there (has Natalya been on TV in the last month?) and none of them talked about wanting to be champion.

Nikki said Sasha might be champion one day, but I can’t remember the last time anyone said they wanted a shot. It’s just about establishing which team is dominant or whatever, because that’s all they’re allowed to fight over right now. I can’t wait for next week when they can get back to normal with some better stories, because this whole AJ record thing is killing anything they had with the introduction of the new roster.

Becky Lynch vs. Brie Bella vs. Sasha Banks

Everyone goes after each other to start and it’s Becky left standing and telling the others to come get her. We take a break thirty seconds into the match of course because having a break after the promo wouldn’t have made a bit of sense. Back with Brie doing a YES chant and kicking Sasha in the head for two. The BRIE MODE running knees don’t appear to make much contact but get two more on Lynch.

It’s Sasha’s turn now as she stacks the other two up in the corner for the double knees. That always looks cool. Brie and Sasha clothesline each other down and it’s Becky in to clean house with suplexes all around. Sasha gets up on the apron but Brie rams Becky into her and grabs a rollup with trunks for the pin at 7:21.

Rating: C+. Brie is an interesting case as she can range anywhere from dreadful to passable on any given night. This was a good little match after a promo that didn’t make a ton of sense when you started to think of it. Thankfully we get to the serious stuff next week though so this is one of the last messes we have to sit through.

Orton, Ambrose, Reigns and Cesaro all promise to win their matches on Sunday.

Long video of Undertaker and Lesnar from Monday.

Randy Orton/Cesaro/Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose vs. Sheamus/Kevin Owens/Luke Harper/Bray Wyatt

That’s quite the main event roster. Orton and Sheamus get things going after about ten minutes of entrances. The threat of an RKO has Sheamus on the floor after about twenty seconds and we’re already in a commercial. Cut that out already! Back with Owens saying he wants Cesaro and getting what he wants when Orton drags Kevin over to face him. A quick suplex puts Kevin down and it’s off to Ambrose vs. Harper with the former getting a very nice canned reaction. Dean drives him into the corner for the same canned pop for Reigns.

Roman kicks Harper in the face but eats a forearm and it’s quickly off to Bray. Back to Cesaro for the European uppercuts in the corner and it’s off to Harper, who whips Cesaro into the ropes. Unfortunately Harper thinks he’s wrestling a human as Cesaro flips over the ropes and lands on the apron for a sunset flip. Everything almost breaks down but in what might be a first, the referee actually holds things together.

The distraction lets Harper kick Cesaro in the face and the villains take over. Bray gets in some shots and NOW Owens is willing to come in for the Cannonball. Back from a second break with Cesaro getting caught in the Regal Roll and a tag to Harper for a slingshot hilo of all things. Owens and Wyatt alternate backsplashes for two and it’s off to a chinlock to kill time. Cesaro does his best to fight out of the corner but walks into the Irish Curse to stop him cold again. A dropkick finally gives Cesaro a break and that invisible crowd pops up one more time.

The hot tag brings in Reigns who starts his variety of clotheslines. The apron kick mixes things up a bit and it’s time for some Samoan drops. See, why can’t he do things like that more often? A suplex or two won’t kill him. Some double teaming from Wyatt and Sheamus puts Reigns down but Sheamus takes too much time going after Ambrose, allowing the Superman Punch to knock him silly.

Dean gets the next hot tag to run over Harper, as has been his custom over the years. Wyatt gets knocked to the floor and Dean dives out onto him, followed by throwing Harper outside for a suicide dive. The standing elbow gets two on Harper with Owens diving on top for the save (Harper was crushed) and it’s time for the parade of finishers, capped off with Dirty Deeds for the pin on Harper at 19:22.

Rating: B. Take eight guys and let them get in there together for a solid formula tag match and watch the good results come in. There isn’t much else you can do to hype up this many matches on one show so this was about all they could put together. Harper losing was probably the best option as he’s just a minion whose job is to lose so Bray doesn’t have to. I’m always a sucker for all the finishers in a row to end a match too so good stuff.

The winners celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a good, solid go home show for everything but the two main events. Smackdown has really improved in recent weeks since they started being the show where the midcard feuds get some spotlight. Raw alternates between Cena vs. Rollins and Lesnar vs. Undertaker, so it’s nice to see the other stuff get some attention too. Good show this week and Summerslam looks solid.

Results

Big Show vs. Ryback went to a double countout

New Day b. Los Matadores/El Torito – Woods pinned Torito after a splash from Big E.

Neville b. Bo Dallas – Red Arrow

Brie Bella b. Becky Lynch and Sasha Banks – Rollup to Lynch with a handful of trunks

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Cesaro/Randy Orton b. Luke Harper/Bray Wyatt/Kevin Owens/Sheamus – Dirty Deeds to Harper

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Finally, make sure to check out the Wrestling Bundle, which wraps up Sunday August 23 at midnight EST. Here are the details:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/08/16/the-wrestling-bundle/




Summerslam Count-Up – 2006: Old Degenerates and Older Americans

Summerslam 2006
Date: August 20, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 16,168
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Joey Styles, John Bradshaw Layfield

This is an interesting show as a lot has changed since last year but WWE is still in the same kind of situation: the shows are coming and going and not a lot is changing. The shows aren’t bad, but there’s nothing that feels like required viewing. This year we have DX vs. the McMahons, Edge defending the Raw Title against Cena, Batista challenging King Booker for the Smackdown Title, Flair vs. Foley in an I Quit match, Hogan vs. Randy Orton and the first ECW Title match in WWE PPV history. The card is stacked but nothing on here feels must see. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about DX taking over the company with their sophomoric jokes. The other matches get some lip service as well.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero claimed that Rey was leeching off the Guerrero name, which he totally was but Guerrero is still playing the heel here. We get videos on Eddie’s relationships with both Rey and Chavo, conveniently ignoring Rey vs. Eddie from last year. Apparently Chavo is coming out of retirement for one night only. The brawl is on fast and JBL is WAY into it already. Chavo hits a quick uppercut and catches a standing Lionsault into a powerslam position, only to have Rey armdrag him out to the floor.

Mysterio misses a plancha to the floor and Chavo hits a big dive of his own to take over. Chavo shouts that it’s his blood instead of Rey’s as JBL calls this the biggest comeback since the resurrection. Rey charges into the corner but Chavo drops him face first onto the buckle to put him down again. Chavo does the Eddie dance, drawing the crowd into the Eddie chant. The masked dude is knocked to the floor and then face first into the buckle to keep him on defense.

Chavo puts him on the top rope and tries to powerbomb Rey to the floor but Rey fights out to avoid death. They facejam each other down to the mat and both guys are in trouble. Back up and Rey gets two off a springboard cross body. A hard kick to the head gets the same for Rey before he hurricanranas Chavo into the 619. The seated senton misses and Mysterio hurricanranas both guys out to the floor.

Chavo takes control and sends Rey back in but here’s Vickie to yell at him. Rey dives off the apron with something the camera misses to take out Chavo and we head back inside. Chavo hits two of the Three Amigos as Vickie is screeching at them to stop fighting. Rey hits the Three Amigos and goes up top but Vickie keeps shouting at him to stop before accidentally crotching him down. Chavo hits a brainbuster and the frog splash for the pin.

Rating: C+. The match was entertaining enough but the bleeding dry of Eddie’s corpse is well beyond old here. Seriously, they were fighting over who was really defending Eddie’s honor. It was fun stuff but the Vickie screeching is getting already getting annoying. She’s been around seven years. How is that possible?

Booker is holding the title with a maniacal look in his eyes. He rants in a British accent for a bit and says he and Sharmell are the most powerful couple in wrestling. This brings in Edge and Lita who just happened to be standing off camera when Booker said that. They debate how important they are and make a wager: if Booker loses he has to be Edge’s servant but if Edge loses he has to kiss Booker’s feet.

This is a good example of what I mean when I talk about the show looking too structured. Why were Edge and Lita right there to respond to those comments? It comes off as so fake and set up in advance that it kills whatever air of realism the show has. Have Booker say they’re the powerful couple, then have Edge and Lita come in later in the show. Same amount of time spent, same result, doesn’t look forced. Why is this so complicated?

ECW Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Big Show is defending after Sabu beat Van Dam in a ladder match this past week. It’s extreme rules, which is a rarity for these title matches anymore. Sabu starts fast by swinging a chair and gets a quick one count off the Arabian Facebuster. The chair is set up in the middle of the ring but Big Show drops Sabu face first onto the steel. Big Show crushes the chair with his boot and chops Sabu down with ease.

We hit an early bearhug but Sabu pokes the eyes to escape. A springboard is caught in a fallaway slam from Big Show to send Sabu to the outside. The small one grabs a chair to blast Show in the face before dropkicking it into Show’s face. Sabu it too banged up to immediately cover so it’s only a one count. With nothing else working, Sabu loads up a table in the corner and hits a tornado DDT for no cover.

Sabu finally knocks him through the table off a springboard from the chair but Show pops up and electric chairs Sabu down. A Vader Bomb crushes Sabu and Show brings in two sets of steps. He bridges a table across them but his chokeslam is countered into a DDT through the table. Sabu sets up another table but charges into a chokeslam through it for the pin.

Rating: D. I don’t care. Seriously that’s the first thing that came to my head. This was less than nine minutes and the ending was never in double at all. At least a third of the match was spent setting up the next spot, especially near the end. The early days of WWECW with the old ECW guys were just torture to get through as it was clearly trying to recreate magic and it wasn’t anything of note. Dull match here and it would be several months before ECW picked up.

Layla won the Diva Search earlier this week.

The Divas welcome Layla to the company. These stupid girl power segments got old fast. Everyone gets on her and then say they’re all kidding. Layla is dragged into the shower and spanked for her initiation. Everyone is clothed so this goes nowhere.

We recap Hogan vs. Orton. Hogan is a legend, Orton is the legend killer, I think you can do the math. There was a stupid bit with Orton hitting on Brooke thrown in which went nowhere.

Randy Orton vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan has a bad leg coming in, meaning he’s perfectly normal. Hulk easily shoves Orton down out of lockup to start before running him down with a shoulder block. The bandana goes into Orton’s face before Randy grabs a headlock. Hogan fights out with a top wristlock as we’re still going very slowly so far, much to Hogan’s liking. Randy finally gets in some shots to the face to put Hogan down, thereby making him the biggest heel in the world.

Hogan fights Orton off in the corner and sends him into the buckle. Almost all Hogan so far which continues as Hogan pounds down right hands in the corner. He bites Randy’s forehead and pokes him in the eye to keep us firmly in the mid-80s. Hogan rakes his back and pounds away on the mat before threatening the referee with a right hand. Orton holds the ropes on an Irish whip and pulls Hogan to the mat to work on the knee.

Back in and Orton cannonballs down on the leg before doing a short form of the circle stomp. A chop block puts Hulk down again but he ducks/collapses to avoid a high cross body. Hogan pounds away but misses the big boot, allowing Orton to dropkick him down. The RKO connects for three but Hogan’s foot was on the ropes. Orton argues with the referee, Hulk Hulks Up and the legdrop ends it.

Rating: D. Well let’s see: the booking was out of the 80s, Hogan broke a sweat for maybe a minute, and Orton was pinned clean by a 50+ year old man in about eleven minutes. This is the opposite of last year with Shawn as Michaels didn’t have much to gain from a win. Orton on the other hand could have ridden this win for months, but instead we get Hogan’s last WWE match (which you couldn’t have known at the time) as a tribute to him, complete with the 1985 formula all over again. Not a fan of this but you had to know it was coming.

We look at a big party yesterday which is exactly what you would think it was. This was also the announcement for WWE 24/7, which was nowhere near as cool as it sounded.

Melina isn’t sure if Foley can beat Flair but he freaks out on her, saying he’ll do it. This was an awkward on screen relationship.

Ric Flair vs. Mick Foley

In something else that was kind of awkward, these two traded shots at each other in their books with Foley saying Flair wrestled the same match for years and Flair calling Foley a glorified stunt man. Tonight is an I Quit match and it’s all about respect. Foley jumps Flair in the corner and pounds away before hitting the running knee to the head. A running trashcan shot to the head has Flair in early trouble and it’s already Socko time. Flair won’t give up so Foley says he’ll suffer.

Foley wraps barbed wire around the sock but Flair grabs Mick’s crotch to block it. We’re not even two minutes into this and we’ve already had a crotch grab. A low blow puts Mick down and Flair wraps the barbed wire sock around his hand for some chops. Ric sends Foley knees first into the steps but Foley rams him into the announce table to get a breather. Foley pulls out a barbed wire board and blasts Flair in the back with it to make Naitch scream.

We head inside again and the fans want fire. Flair is busted open (duh) so Foley rubs the barbed wire over the cut for good measure. A barbed wire board to the head and the shoulder have Flair in even more trouble but he tells Foley to kiss something instead of quitting. Foley spreads out the thumbtacks and slams Ric down onto them in a scary looking but perfectly safe spot. Think about it: the tacks are what, half an inch long? All they’re going to go into is fat so while it’ll hurt, there’s no real danger to the spot. It’s like being stung by a bunch of bees.

Anyway Flair still won’t quit so Foley brings in the barbed wire ball bat to cut at Flair’s head even more. Flair hits his second low blow to escape before sending him shoulder first into the post. The ball bat to the shoulder has Foley in big trouble as Ric goes into old school brawler mode. Foley won’t quit so Flair threatens to kill him by cutting out his heart.

A third low blow has Foley on the apron, allowing for Ric to knock him off the apron and onto the concrete. Foley is apparently out cold so medics and Melina come out to check on him. The trainer says it’s over and the bell rings. That’s not good enough for Flair though and he sends Foley back in to rub the ball bat over Foley’s face again. He runs the barbed wire over Mick’s unconscious eyes and Melina throws in the towel to end it. Wait that’s STILL not good enough for Flair because Foley has to say it. Ric threatens Melina with the ball bat and Foley quits to save her.

Rating: B. This was one heck of a bloodbath until Melina had to get involved. I get that they didn’t want either guy to quit but dang man, did we really need Melina out there? Like I said it never was a good fit on screen and would end with Melina screwing over Foley for no apparent reason. Good match, but Flair flat out doesn’t need to be doing this at his age.

Vince, Shane and Armando Alejandro Estrada (Umaga’s manager) make fun of Foley until Vince asks if they have Umaga’s support tonight. Armando says si.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. King Booker

Booker is defending and Batista never lost the title, only being stripped due to injury. This is his first major match since December/January. Booker’s wife Sharmell reaches Vickie levels of annoying by saying ALL HAIL KING BOOKER about 18 times on the way to the ring. Feeling out process to start with Booker taking him into the corner and slapping him across the face. Batista easily shoves him across the ring to prove a point as things are starting slowly.

The champion grabs a headlock but completely misses a spin kick, allowing Batista to counter into a powerslam for two. Booker tries to bail with Sharmell but Batista doesn’t even let him get close. Back in and Booker blocks a Batista Bomb by snapping Batista’s neck across the ropes to take over. We hit a chinlock less than four minutes in and the fans aren’t pleased. Back up and Batista hits a sloppy belly to belly suplex for two but Sharmell sends in the scepter for a cheap shot, giving Booker more control.

Booker goes after the arm, which is the injury that kept Batista on the shelf for so long. That makes too much sense though so it’s off to a regular chinlock. Batista finally gets up and crotches Booker on the top before hitting some weak clotheslines. They head to the floor with Booker sending him into the barricade to take over. A missile dropkick gets two on Big Dave but the ax kick misses. Batista Jackhammers him down for two and busts out a full nelson slam of all things. He loads up the Batista Bomb and Sharmell comes in for the lame DQ.

Rating: D. Well at least it wasn’t that long. These two had horrible chemistry together so of course they had two more PPV matches until Batista finally took the title at Survivor Series. The ending sucked, the match sucked, Batista looked as slow as Hogan out there, and the fans were bored by the match. Sounds like it needs a sequel to me.

Post match Batista “destroys” Booker, which translates to him not being able to get him up for a Batista Bomb until Booker clearly pulls himself up. Again, this feud went on for three more months.

Jeff Hardy is coming back tomorrow. Why bother announcing it when you can have a big surprise like that?

DX talks to someone we can’t see. They tell him how much Vince praised Umaga, calling him the REAL monster in WWE. They leave and whoever was in there bangs on the door.

We recap DX vs. the McMahons. This feud started with Shawn vs. Vince but HBK recruited HHH to help him out. DX destroyed a bunch of Vince’s stuff and made fun of him, basically getting on the nerves of everyone over 17 years old. Vince and Shane brought in everyone imaginable to help them but DX dispatched them easily because they’re both Hall of Famers and they were fighting jobbers to the stars. Umaga was the only one who could beat them one on one, making those matches the only interesting parts of the entire feud.

D-Generation X vs. Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon

Vince and Shane head back to the entrance and send out the Spirit Squad as the first line of defense. Superkicks, backdrops and Pedigrees abound, getting rid of the Raw Tag Champions (the cheerleaders) in less than fifteen seconds. DX beat the Spirit Squad about five times in this whole thing but never won the tag titles. I never quite got why.

Next up are Kennedy, Finlay and Regal who do a bit better thanks to Finlay’s club but only last about 40 seconds. Now it’s Big Show to really challenge DX. Why all nine guys didn’t come out at once is never really addressed. The three midcarders take down HHH on the floor, leaving Shawn alone with Show. A cobra clutch backbreaker and the Log Roll knock Shawn silly as HHH is destroyed. Now the McMahons come to the ring and there’s the opening bell.

Vince slams Shawn down to start and it’s off to Shane for some dancing. He peppers Shawn with left jabs and hits a big right cross to puts him down. HHH is still down from a chokeslam through the announce table. Vince comes back in for something like a clothesline to the ribs and fires off elbows in the corner. A double back elbow puts Shawn down and HHH is finally remembering what planet he’s on. Shane of course slides to the floor to knock him down again, which is pretty smart.

Shane hits a backbreaker on Michaels and it’s back to Papa McMahon. There’s a double elbow but HHH is on his feet. Shane, again, wisely baseball slides him onto the other announce table. The McMahons bust out the Demolition Decapitation and the Hart Attack of all things, complete with signature Bret pose. They even hit a bad looking Doomsday Device but Shawn pops up at two and fires off right hands. Vince sneaks in with a shot to the back and down goes HBK again. Shawn scores with a double clothesline and everyone is down.

HHH is back up on the apron and actually takes the hot tag. Adrenaline kicks in and house is cleaned with a high knee and a neckbreaker to Shane. Clotheslines take both McMahons down and there’s a spinebuster for the young one. Shawn drops the elbow on Vince and hits a Cactus Clothesline to take Shane out.

Here’s Umaga to superkick Shawn and hit a quick Samoan Spike to HHH. This brings out Kane as the guy DX was talking to so he can fight Umaga to the back. Shane can only get two on the Game so Vince punches the referee. Shane loads up a Coast to Coast but Shawn superkicks him out of the air. A trashcan shot to Vince sets up Sweet Chin Music and the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: B-. That’s about as high as they can get and there’s nothing wrong with that. The booking was as smart as you could get since there might not be two guys in the company that could be a legitimate threat to DX in a straight match so making it eleven on two to start was all they could do. The rest of the match is your usual tag team formula match and that’s all they could do here. The fans popped for the ending too so I can’t complain much.

Wrestlemania 23 is in Detroit.

We recap Edge vs. Cena. Edge won MITB last year at Wrestlemania and cashed in on Cena at New Year’s Revolution nine months later. After some title trading with Van Dam and Cena, Edge wound up with the belt on Raw, setting up the one on one showdown here tonight.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

Cena is the hometown boy tonight. If Edge gets disqualified he loses the title. Cena charges him into the corner and the booing begins. John pounds away and gets one off a back elbow and a belly to belly suplex. Edge avoids a charge to send Cena shoulder first into the post and out to the floor. It’s kind of early for that spot. Back in and Edge beats on Cena with basic strikes before knocking him off the apron and into the barricade.

Cena makes it back in at nine but Edge immediately drops an elbow on his back for two more. John makes a comeback with right hands as the fans are booing even louder now. A quick fisherman’s suplex gets two on Edge but he sends Cena over the top and out to the floor for the third time. Back in again and Cena misses a cross body to put him down again. Why it puts Edge down as well isn’t clear.

We hit the chinlock for a good while until Cena breaks the hold with pure power. Cena hits a knee to the chest but walks into a big boot for two. Edge goes up top and fights off Cena so he can hit a top rope clothesline for two. Off to a camel clutch but Cena again powers out of it. Both guys are down so Lita sends in a chair. Edge picks it up before throwing it down out of fear in a cute bit. Cena initiates his finishing sequence but the FU is countered into the Impaler for two.

Edge goes up again but has to escape the FU off the ropes into an electric chair but Cena gets two off a victory roll. A middle rope cross body is rolled through into the FU but a Lita distraction makes Cena drop Edge. The champion is sent into his chick and Cena gets a close two off a rollup. A double clothesline puts both guys down until Edge rolls over for two.

The Canadian is up first but the spear is countered into the STFU. Lita tries to come in with the belt but Edge waves her off and gets the rope. The referee has to drag Cena off, allowing Lita to load up brass knuckles on Edge’s hand. Cena grabs the FU anyway but Lita comes in, only to be thrown on top of Edge in a double FU. How that isn’t a DQ isn’t clear but Cena flips her to the mat, allowing Edge to knock him out with the knuckles to retain the title.

Rating: B-. This took some time to get going but the ending was great. Edge winning is an interesting concept and they would go with the same idea next month when Cena beat Edge in Edge’s signature match in his hometown. The match wasn’t all that good though as it felt like they were just killing time until the end, which makes for a dull match.

Overall Rating: C. Right in the middle is about perfect here as there are almost equal amounts of good and bad. The interesting things about this show are the match lengths. Usually there are some very short matches and one or two longer ones. Here there’s only one match under nine minutes and the longest is the main event which isn’t even sixteen. That makes for a show where there’s nothing huge to save the bad stuff and everything is almost equal in length, meaning you can weigh almost everything the same. The show is definitely watchable but skip Booker vs. Batista.

Ratings Comparison

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Big Show vs. Sabu

Original: C

Redo: D

Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: D

Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair

Original: B-

Redo: B

Batista vs. King Booker

Original: D

Redo: Dhttp://kbwrestlingreviews.com/wp-admin/post-new.php

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. D-Generation X

Original: C-

Redo: B-

Edge vs. John Cena

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: C

Other than Hogan, not a lot changes here. This show pretty much is what it is.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/09/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2006-hogan-and-dx-are-in-charge-are-we-in-1998/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – August 10, 2015: Wet Hot American Summerslam Build

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 10, 2015
Location: Xfinity Arena, Everett, Washington
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

We have less than two weeks before Summerslam and the question at the moment is whether or not John Cena is going to be able to defend his US Title in the main event against World Champion Seth Rollins due to his recently broken nose. The majority of the card is set already so the next few shows are just going to be about firming up the existing programs. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Rollins to open the show, complete with another video of the knee to the nose. Rollins is still wondering where Cena is, as he issued his challenge for Summerslam last week but there hasn’t been a reply yet. Where has Cena been? Jamming on the new Dr. Dre album and contemplating reigniting his rap “career?” Cena is straight out of action, not straight out of Compton.

Rollins doesn’t understand why he hasn’t heard from Cena as John is scheduled for Tough Enough tomorrow. If he can be on that show, it makes Seth think that Cena is cowering from the champ. Rollins gets word that Cena is here but it’s via satellite. We get a picture of Cena with only his mouth moving out of a late night talk show sketch.

Cena”, in Rollins’ voice, says Yabba Dabba Doo and says he’s going to Tough Enough to apply for a new job. It’s gone from Hustle, Loyalty and Respect to surgery, recovery and rehab. Cena is giving up because his nose was so destroyed and there’s no way he can beat Rollins and because he looks like he got a nose job from Picasso.

Seth talks about last week’s WWE World Title Open Challenge but here’s Cesaro to interrupt. Cesaro doesn’t like hearing Rollins going on and on and on and on, but he does like hearing about another Open Challenge. Rollins says not so fast because Cesaro hasn’t earned it, but here’s Kevin Owens to interrupt as well.

Kevin says Cesaro believes in himself because of a bunch of CESARO SECTION signs, but why should either of these two have any say when neither of them can beat John Cena? Cena beat Rollins a few weeks back but Owens pinned Cena, so he should get the shot. Now it’s Rollins coming out to make fun of Owens’ gut and Cesaro’s glasses but Rollins says Tom Brady has a better chance of getting a free meal in Seattle than any of them do of getting a title shot tonight, so they can all get out of here.

This brings out HHH, who didn’t like Rollins saying he doesn’t care what the Authority thinks. The doctors have told him that Cena is 50/50 for Summerslam, so Rollins might need a backup opponent. Therefore, tonight there’s going to be a triple threat match with Cesaro vs. Orton vs. Owens, and the winner gets a title shot against Rollins TONIGHT. There were some funny lines in here, which makes me think the WWE writers had nothing to do with it. This also ran too long, which isn’t surprising as they could have cut this WAY down.

Team BAD vs. Team Bella

PCB (their new name after an adult site had already taken Submission Sorority. You can’t make that stuff up) is on commentary. In an inset interview, Team BAD debuts the term Belladashians and I want to reach for a gun. Naomi elbows Fox in the face to start but it’s off to Nikki for two off a back elbow. BAD takes over on the champ though with Naomi doing her corner wiggle, earning her a spinebuster from Nikki for two. Nikki’s spinning kick out of the corner drops Naomi again and we take a break.

Back with Sasha getting two on Nikki as PCB laughs at the idea of the Bellas starting the Divas Revolution. Nikki finally gets free and makes the hot tag to Brie, who is as over as she’s ever been since it’s her husband’s home territory. Brie cleans house as everything breaks down but Tamina gets in a few good shots. The superkick is loaded up but Brie gets a HORRIBLE looking rollup for the pin on Tamina at 9:00. Come on, it’s a ROLLUP. How can you not do that properly?

Rating: C. This was fine for the most part but the ending sequence was a letdown. I like the idea of putting Brie in there where she’s going to be popular, but I’m getting really tired of the Bellas not knowing if they’re faces or heels from one week to another. You can’t have their personalities on Total Divas and then expect people to cheer for them on Raw. Well at least you can’t if you have the slightest bit of intelligence about you.

Everyone brawls post match and the Bellas and Fox are knocked to the floor, leaving everyone else to have a staredown. So much for winning meaning anything.

Stephen Amell is here.

New Day vs. Los Matadores

Kofi’s grin as he skips to the ring is greatness. New Day takes over early on and we hit the rotating stomps on Diego in the corner as Woods plays cheerleader on the floor. Big E. slams Diego down for two but he misses a charge into the post. The tag brings in Fernando to speed things up with some weird shouting and a springboard flip dive to take Kofi down. Woods gets Kofi out of the way of a charge but Torito takes him over with a hurricanrana. The Midnight Hour is enough to put Fernando away at 4:01.

Rating: D+. It’s just a squash but it’s nice to get the Matadores out of the running for the title shot. I don’t think anyone would have bought them in there and it never would have worked. I’m really hoping we aren’t stuck with New Day vs. Prime Time Players again but adding another team or two would spruce things right up.

Post break New Day is dancing and singing in the back when Renee Young comes in and says it’s New Day vs. the Prime Time Players vs. Los Matadores vs. Lucha Dragons. New Day thinks we should just add Doom, Men on a Mission and Harlem Heat but then decide that a four way is fine. Renee even joins in on the clapping. I’m very glad WWE has basically said Los Matadores losing there meant nothing as they’re instantly in the title match anyway. Why do we watch these TV matches again?

HHH gives Rollins a pep talk. It’s a wonder that Rollins isn’t sitting on his daddy’s knee for this one.

We recap Reigns issuing a challenge on Smackdown for himself/Ambrose vs. Wyatt/Harper at Summerslam, which was accepted at the end of the show. Take note, as this is one of the only times all year that something actually happens on Summerslam.

Cesaro vs. Randy Orton vs. Kevin Owens

No one gets an entrance as they’re all in the ring when we come back from a break. Owens gets double teamed to start so he bails to the floor, leaving Orton to roll Cesaro up for a fast two. Cesaro can’t swing Owens so he gets two off a double stomp instead. Orton pops back up for a pair of t-bone suplexes but Owens is able to post Cesaro and snap Orton’s throat across the top rope.

A backsplash gets two on Randy as this is very fast paced so far. The fans are behind Kevin as he hammers Orton down in the corner. Cesaro comes back in and Orton is sent to the floor. That’s fine with Owens who knocks Cesaro outside with him, only to have Orton drop Cesaro back first onto the barricade. Owens drops Cesaro onto the barricade as well but Orton sends Kevin into it so he won’t feel left out.

All three get back in with Owens busting out a string of European uppercuts, only to walk into Orton’s backbreaker. Cesaro high cross bodies Orton for two more but he has to counter the RKO into a Crossface. Randy grabs a rope but it doesn’t count in a triple threat because it’s No DQ, so Orton crawls to the floor for the break. Owens knocks Cesaro to the floor and hits a flip dive to take both guys out as we take a break, with Cesaro holding his knee.

Back with Cesaro on his feet in the corner but getting sent into the buckle for the Cannonball to give Owens another near fall. Owens goes up top but has to fight off a superplex. That’s fine for one person, but Orton and Cesaro are easily able to double superplex him down in a cool looking visual. It’s Cesaro covering for two but Orton will have none of that.

They slug it out instead and Randy gets swung, setting up the Sharpshooter. Cesaro lets go because of Owens, but the Swing is kicked away, sending Cesaro into Orton. Randy is fine enough to powerslam Owens though, sending both guys to the apron for a double Orton DDT.

Cesaro breaks up the RKO and hits a nice dive to take Owens out, followed by a springboard twisting European uppercut for two. That was one heck of a sequence. Cesaro takes Owens up to but gets shoved down, only to put his knees up to block the Swanton. A superkick takes Cesaro’s head off but it’s an RKO to block the Pop Up Powerbomb. Cesaro eats an RKO as well, giving Orton the pin and the title shot at 18:15.

Rating: B+. Yeah Orton won, but if Cesaro won here and lost to Rollins tonight, people would have complained about Cesaro getting pinned. On the other hand, if Owens won here and lost to Rollins tonight, people would have complained about Owens getting pinned. Now on the third hand (find a friend who will lend you a hand), Orton can win and then lose to Rollins and people will only complain about it being Orton in the main event slot again, as it was pretty clear he would be when he came out for the opening segment. Really good match of course, as you would expect with those three in there.

Ambrose said he didn’t have a friend growing up, but it’s nice to have one now so he can get bailed out of jail in Laredo. Reigns thinks Wyatt wouldn’t do anything for Harper because they’re not family. Ambrose knows how Reigns likes his coffee, water and beer, which is proof that they’re brothers. Believe that.

We get quick thoughts from various legends and wrestlers about the history of Undertaker and how amazing the Streak really was. Heyman wants to hear about the myth of Brock Lesnar, which leads to a variety of people talking about how unique Brock’s skills really are and how you can only hope to survive instead of defeating him.

We see some clips of the Streak ending and people talk about what a shock it was. Heyman’s look of astonishment when the pin actually happened was perfect. Then fifteen months later Undertaker interrupted Brock squashing Rollins at Battleground and a huge brawl ensued the next night on Raw. The talking heads are split on their pick for Summerslam. This was every “they’re both so awesome” segment you’ve ever seen.

Undertaker and Lesnar will both be here next week, in Brock’s hometown of Minneapolis.

Dean Ambrose vs. Luke Harper

Reigns and Wyatt are at ringside. Ambrose slugs away at Harper to start as I think we get a SEA-HAWKS chant early on. A big side slam plants Dean for two but he low bridges Harper to the floor for a running standing elbow from the apron as we take an early break. Back with Harper Gator Rollins Harper and putting on a chinlock. Wyatt has taken Byron’s chair so Byron is left standing. Fans: “SIT DOWN BYRON!”

Ambrose fights out of a chinlock and scores with a tornado DDT but Dirty Deeds is countered. The fight spills outside with Dean blasting Wyatt over the table and heading back inside for the rebound clothesline on Harper. Reigns intercepts Bray before he can interfere but eats a superkick from Harper. That earns Harper a suicide dive from Ambrose but Dean gets crotched back inside. The discus clothesline puts Dean away at 9:35.

Rating: C. I liked this more than I would have expected to given how many times we’ve seen them fight. The tag match at Summerslam should be fun, but it doesn’t quite feel like a huge match. It’s still not really clear why Wyatt hates Reigns, but at least there’s enough of a backstory there to warrant another match.

It’s time for MizTV, but first of all Miz has to rip on Amell, saying that once Stardust runs through him, call Miz up for some rebranding and acting lessons. Tonight’s guest is Daniel Bryan and it take a bit for the chants to wear down. Miz asks for quiet so the chants get even louder. Bryan, in a funny timid voice: “Miz wants you to shut up so you better be quiet!”

Bryan finally gets a chance to speak and says he isn’t just here to be on MizTV. Of course he wasn’t going to miss Raw in Washington and it’s time for that SEA-HAWKS chant again. Miz reminds the people that he’s a Cleveland Browns fan (that explains so much) before bringing up mentoring Bryan on the first season of NXT. Bryan mocks Miz’s Hollywood career and wardrobe, but thinks that his own accomplishments are due to hard work and all the fans around the world. Miz asks about Bryan’s medical status, which is still not great. That brings Bryan to his new book, which is a New York Times bestseller, and Tough Enough.

Miz goes on to Ryback and the Intercontinental Title, which should be awarded to Miz after all this waiting. Cue Big Show to call Miz a cross dressing Jedi manure spreader. The fans tell Big Show to retire but he says find someone to retire him. This brings out the returning Ryback so Miz bails, but Bryan throws him back inside to meet the monsters. Ryback cleans house and poses with Bryan to end things.

Video on Charlotte.

It’s a three team Divas elimination tag at Summerslam.

Mark Henry vs. Rusev

Lana is on commentary and confirms that Dolph will be back after Summerslam. Summer quickly gets on the apron for a distraction but Lana pulls her down. That’s fine with Rusev who superkicks Henry down, only to have both girls come in for the no contest at 1:07.

Summer puts Lana in the Accolade and a Rusev flag falls.

We recap Neville vs. Stardust over the last week.

Neville vs. King Barrett

Neville starts fast, kicks Barrett in the head and scores with the Red Arrow for the pin at 1:20. Total and complete squash because that’s what Barrett does.

Stardust comes in to lay Neville out but stops for a staredown with Amell. He knocks Amell’s hat off and Stephen jumps the railing, jumps to the apron and jumps over the top rope to tackle Stardust in a pretty impressive athletic display. Security quickly breaks it up.

After a break HHH yells at Amell, but Stephen wants a tag match at Summerslam. HHH laughs the idea off, but Amell shouts him down and offers to sign any waivers he has to sign. Ever the genius, HHH agrees to a tag match between Wade Barrett (yes Wade)/Stardust vs. Amell/Neville at Summerslam. HHH: “Don’t bring a stunt man.”

Sheamus doesn’t care if Rollins or Orton wins tonight because he might just cash in on either of them.

WWE World Title: Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is defending and stalls on the floor early on. The champ comes in and the threat of an RKO sends him bailing to the floor as we go to the final commercial. Back with Rollins holding a chinlock before Orton makes a comeback with clotheslines and the powerslam for two. That’s enough for Seth as he goes outside to get the belt, only to eat another clothesline from Orton. He drops Rollins on the announcers’ table before they head back inside where Seth nails the low superkick.

The champ gets crotched on top and superplexed down for two. Orton can’t follow up but is able to counter the Pedigree, only to have his DDT countered. Rollins his one of his own and teases the RKO but settles for another failed Pedigree attempt. Orton backdrops him to the apron for the springboard knee but Seth dives into the RKO (in one of those spots where he was clearly just diving that way so he could dive into the move), drawing in Sheamus for the DQ at 13:38.

Rating: C+. Yeah fine. I think we all knew this was the ending and there was nothing wrong with that as they weren’t going to change the title just two weeks before Summerslam. Good enough match though as these two have chemistry, but they need to get off this Sheamus vs. Orton stuff already because it’s really not interesting.

Post match Sheamus Brogue Kicks Rollins and goes to cash in but eats the RKO to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Not a great show this week but they moved things forward going into Summerslam and that’s all that mattered. I’m digging the idea of the title being defended on TV as even though it’s highly unlikely that we’d see a title change, the mere chance that it could happen makes the match feel better. I liked this show a lot better than the recent weeks and while it’s sill not excellent, at least it’s a step in the right direction and the kind of show they needed to have tonight.

Results

Team Bella b. Team BAD – Rollup to Tamina

New Day b. Los Matadores – Midnight Hour to Fernando

Randy Orton b. Cesaro and Kevin Owens – RKO to Cesaro

Luke Harper b. Dean Ambrose – Discus lariat

Rusev vs. Mark Henry went to a no contest when Lana and Summer Rae interfered

Neville b. King Barrett – Red Arrow

Randy Orton b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Sheamus interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – 1999: The Pre-Game Show

Summerslam 1999
Date: August 22, 1999
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 17,130
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is the end of the summer for an interesting year in the WWF. The main event is the now mega heel HHH and the returning Mankind challenging Austin for the world title, but there’s another main attraction: Minnesota Governor and former wrestler Jesse Ventura is the guest referee for the second time in the history of this event. 1999 is a year remembered for a lot of flash and little substance but hopefully that doesn’t hold true here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about various guest referees over the years, including Mike Tyson and both McMahons. Jesse Ventura talks about how he’ll be the law in the ring and doesn’t care what happens.

Jesse lectures Chyna and HHH about not cheating. Chyna is allowed to be out there but the pinfall has to be in the ring and it has to be legal.

The recently debuted Chris Jericho yells at Jericholic Howard Finkel for being late.

Intercontinental Title/European Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. D’Lo Brown

Brown holds both titles coming in and Jarrett’s manager Debra is in a bikini with a coat over it. Jeff sends her to the back to make sure the fans completely hate him. In the back, Debra offers to escort Brown to the ring to get back at Jarrett. Jeff jumps D’Lo to start but the champion comes back with a powerslam for one. Another powerslam gets two and Jeff can’t bail to the floor for a breather. A leapfrog is countered into a short powerbomb for two but Jeff comes back with a sleeper.

Brown is sent to the floor and a baseball slide sends him into the barricade. Ross gets in one of his eye roll worthy lines by saying Brown wasn’t safe on that one. I love JR but when he gets bad it’s hard not to cringe. A clothesline puts Jarrett over the barricade and Brown pounds away. This is basic stuff so far but not bad at all. Back in and Jarrett gets in some shots to take over as the fans are behind the champion.

Jarrett hits a tornado DDT on the arm and wraps it around the post. The fans are more interested in the recently named Puppies. Jarrett misses a running crotch attack and gets caught in a running Liger Bomb for no cover. A tilt-a-whirl powerslam gets two and a quick legdrop gets two. Brown misses a modified Swanton but here’s Debra on the apron. Jeff gets the guitar but here’s Brown’s training partner Mark Henry to destroy the guitar over D’Lo’s head to give Jarrett the titles. Debra of course rejoins Jeff eight minutes after leaving him.

Rating: C+. Nice opener here but the scent of Russo is strong in this one. Debra turned twice within a span of ten minutes in addition to interference and a run-in during a match for two titles at once. These two could clearly have a good match on their own but we had to bog it down with extra stuff anyway. That’s Russo 101: yeah it can make things interesting, but at other times it gets in the way of good wrestling.

Edge and Christian are ready for Tag Team Turmoil (a tag team gauntlet match) tonight. They outgrew Gangrel and are ready for his new team: the Hardys.

Tag Team Turmoil

As mentioned, Edge and Christian start against the Hardys which is a layup for a good start. The Canadians are good guys here and we have six teams involved with the winners getting a tag title shot tomorrow on Raw. Naturally it’s a brawl to start until we get down to Edge vs. Matt. A DDT puts the Hardy down and it’s off to Christian for a double hiptoss for two. Christian BADLY misses a spinwheel kick but it’s Gangrel interfering to give the Hardys control.

The Hardys take their shirts off to almost no reaction so you know they’re evil here. Jeff hits a slingshot springboard moonsault for two followed by Poetry in Motion to crush Christian in the corner. Matt takes forever to cover and brings in Jeff for a senton (not yet the Swanton) Bomb for two.

Edge makes the save and allows Christian to hit a double reverse DDT to set up the hot tag. Everything breaks down and it’s Edge and Jeff running the barricades to set up a spear in midair. Christian dives onto them both followed by Matt mostly missing a moonsault to take everyone else out. Back in and Edge pulls Matt off the top, setting up a top rope elbow to give Christian the pin.

The third team in is Mideon/Viscera and the big man is starting with Christian. Viscera hits a quick Samoan drop for no cover and it’s off to Mideon for a double elbow drop. A knee drop gets two but Christian avoids a middle rope elbow. Off to Edge who speeds things up but gets drilled by a spinwheel kick (again it barely connected but it’s more excusable with Viscera). Edge avoids a charging big man and a double shoulder puts Viscera outside. Mideon is speared down for the pin.

Droz/Prince Albert (Tensai) are the fourth team and it’s Albert quickly throwing Edge into the corner. JR gets on Jerry for not knowing anything about Albert but Lawler makes a great point: “Look at him and you know everything you need to know.” Albert gets two off a neckbreaker as the announcers argue whether football careers matter in wrestling (Hint: most of the time they don’t). Christian chop blocks Albert and the Downward Spiral sends Edge and Christian to the next match.

The Acolytes are here before the three count and it’s Bradshaw working over Edge to start. Edge comes back with a swinging neckbreaker and a missile dropkick as JR is whiny because Lawler pointed out how stupid the football stats were. Bradshaw powerbombs Edge out of the corner for two and it’s off to Faarooq. ANOTHER spinwheel kick barely connects (the production staff isn’t on their game tonight) but Bradshaw gets a tag before Christian does.

A belly to back suplex gets two for Bradshaw and it’s back to Faarooq for more basic power offense. We hit the chinlock for a bit before the Faarooq spinebuster sets up an arrogant cover for two. Edge gets up for a DDT and it’s a double tag to Christian and Bradshaw. Everything breaks down and Christian gets two off a tornado DDT. Edge drops Christian onto Bradshaw as the Hollys come out before the pin. The distraction lets Bradshaw kill Christian with the Clothesline to get us down to the final two teams.

Faarooq hits a quick Dominator on Crash but Hardcore makes the save. The cousins get in an argument over who gets to fight Faarooq but it’s the Acolytes getting to beat up Hardcore. It’s back to Crash who has no effect on Faarooq so the announcers bicker some more to entertain us. Hardcore finally gets the tag and dropkicks Faarooq, triggering a brawl between the cousins. Faarooq hits a quick spinebuster on Hardcore for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C-. This match had the same issues that almost all gauntlet matches have: if these teams can get wins this fast, why don’t they do it all the time? The matches are just quick segments instead of actual matches with the longest being a slightly longer version of a TV match. However there was hope on the horizon as Edge and Christian and the Hardys would have a rematch with ladders in two months. Also, a team is coming from Dudleyville in about two weeks. The magic approaches.

The Hollys fight again.

Big Show and Undertaker arrive.

Al Snow grooms his dog Pepper and warns him of Boss Man singing Ethel Merman songs. Good advice actually.

Road Dogg comes out to watch the next match. He wants a shot at the Hardcore Title tomorrow night but here’s the brand new Chris Jericho to interrupt him. He’s on a raised platform in front of the crowd and this is his PPV debut. Jericho is disappointed in this whole show. He can’t believe it but Raw is Snore has been topped by Summersham. The people here have been conned into paying for it and now they look like fools.

Jericho rips on the roster and says the worst is standing in the ring right now. No one cares about Roadie and his spelling. If Dogg wants to be impressive, spell lugubrious. He makes fun of Dogg’s clothes and haircut and says DX sure sucks. Road Dogg tells him to shut up and Jericho is SHOCKED. Dogg’s mama cares about him but he’s not sure if he should do the catchphrase because Jericho might take him up on it.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Big Boss Man

Boss Man is defending and Dogg is doing commentary. Before the match Snow leaves Pepper in a small kennel in the back. Snow: “You know Head came to the ring with me.” Snow is waiting on Boss Man on the set and hits a high cross body to get us going. Dogg gets up and is going to be a roving reporter. Snow hits Man with a chair and they go to the back almost immediately.

Boss Man comes back with right hands and breaks a chalkboard over Snow’s head. Pepper’s case goes upside Snow’s head but Snow hits him with the board. Boss Man steals a crutch to blast Snow in the back before sending him into the Pepsi machine. Snow avoids the falling machine and throws Boss Man into the side of an SUV. They open a garage door and head outside before going across the street to a bar.

They’re fighting in front of the door and a superkick gets two for Snow. Snow is thrown through the patio furniture for two and we head inside. A shot with the Yellow Pages puts Snow down but he gets up to hit on some chick. Snow hits him with a magazine rack and they slug it out with broomsticks.

We hit the restroom for the required “comedy” spot with Boss Man taking soap in the eye. A beer to Boss Man’s face slows him down and Snow chokes him with a chain. Snow moonsaults him through a table but Boss Man is up first. They head into the pool hall and Boss Man hits Dogg with a drink. Roadie comes back with a nightstick shot to give Snow the title in an abrupt ending.

Rating: C. This is one of the more famous hardcore matches and it’s pretty harmless goofy fun. The division was at its peak here but the 24/7 Rule was coming to make it a total parody. It was less than eight minutes so it’s hard to really complain about this one. Yeah it’s bad but it’s completely harmless for the most part.

Snow runs back across the street to check on Pepper but has to beat up Stevie Richards and Blue Meanie for some reason.

Jesse warns Mankind about using chairs and how it won’t be allowed, but Mankind would rather talk about Geraldine Ferraro’s electability.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Tori

Ivory is defending and Tori is just horrible for the most part. Ivory painted the word sl** on Tori a few weeks ago to set this up. Tori charges in and hits a powerslam for two and it’s time for a breather. The crowd is already dead for this and a back elbow gets two for the champion. Tori hits a pair of suplexes and some lame kicks for two. Ivory is loudly calling spots to keep Tori from screwing everything up. The fans chant TAKE IT OFF as Ivory hooks a big swing. Tori comes back with a horrible spear and a middle rope cross body for two. They horribly botch a sunset flip so they do it again with Ivory sitting on Tori for the pin.

Rating: F+. Tori looked good in a bra and tight pants and that’s about it. Seriously, she was TERRIBLE and makes the modern Divas look like ring generals. Ivory was trying out there but she was hardly a miracle worker. Trish would debut soon but wouldn’t get good for about four more years.

Post match Ivory tries to take Tori’s top off but Luna Vachon makes the save, becoming the heel of the segment.

Rock verbally massacres Michael Cole by insulting his tie and implying Cole is a bit coome ci coom ca. Not that it matters as Rock is going to destroy Billy Gunn tonight. This was a bad time for Rock as he had a bunch of nothing feuds until he got back into the title hunt to close out the year.

Billy Gunn has a surprise under a tarp.

We recap Steve Blackman vs. Ken Shamrock. Blackman is recently back from an injury and they’ve been beating each other up for weeks. The result is another Lion’s Den match with weapons hanging from the cage. JR and King do the narration here for some reason.

Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Blackman

This is in the Lion’s Den which is that small cage which is NOT ripping off UFC. Not at all. You win by escape only. Blackman starts with the nunchucks but Shamrock comes back with profanity. Blackman chokes him down but gets caught in an armbar. Ken throws the nunchucks away and rams Blackman into the cage. Shamrock pounds Blackman down and whips him into the cage for a high kick to the head.

Blackman blocks a kendo stick shot and fires off kicks of his own before sending Ken into the cage. An atomic drop puts Shamrock down again and Blackman pounds him in the back with his martial arts sticks. Shamrock gets up and runs the cage wall to ram into Blackman with a kind of elbow to the face. A belly to back suplex puts Blackman down but Ken can’t quite follow up.

Back up and Blackman hits a quick DDT but Shamrock snaps off a powerslam. An enziguri puts Ken down and Steve pounds away with a kendo stick. A big shot to the head puts Ken down but he comes back with a wicked belly to belly to take over. Ken hits Blackman in the head (shoulder) with the stick….and that’s it. No reason is given but I’d assume a knockout, even though the announcers said you had to leave to win.

Rating: D+. This didn’t do anything for me. It was basically a hardcore match in a confined area which isn’t the most interesting thing in the world. It’s a far cry from last year’s version with Owen keeping up with Shamrock every step of the way. Granted this is Steve Blackman, a black hole of charisma instead of one of the best of all time. Nothing to see here but it wasn’t horrible.

We see Shane attacking Test earlier today.

Test says this is serious tonight.

Test vs. Shane McMahon

This is a Greenwich street fight with love her or leave her rules. Test is dating Stephanie but Shane doesn’t approve. If Test wins, Shane stays out of their lives but if Shane wins then the relationship ends. Test has bad ribs but Shane has no backup due to Test injuring every member of the Mean Street Posse. Scratch that theory actually as they come walking out before the match. Thanks for wasting my time on the video of Test destroying all of them. The Posse has a couch set for them in the front row.

Test takes Shane down to start but Shane hits a quick spear back inside, only to be pounded in the corner. A backdrop puts Shane down as the Posse drinks champagne. Shane is sent HARD into the steps and then into the crowd for a drink to the head. Test catches Shane diving off the barricade and powerslams him down onto the floor. Shane staggers around ringside so Test launches him at the Posse to tip the couch over.

The injured Posse goes after Test and give Shane a mailbox of all things to crack over Test’s head. A street sign stuns Test again and there’s a framed portrait of the Posse shattered over Test’s head. That’s only good for two and the fans are getting into this. Shane does a great looking leapfrog and this a jumping back elbow to the face to put Test down. A corkscrew senton (Spiral Tap) of all things misses and Test comes back with right hands.

Another leapfrog is countered into a sweet powerbomb but Rodney of the Posse distracts the referee. Test’s big boot hits the referee but he clotheslines Shane to the floor. The street sign puts Shane down again but here’s the Posse again to take Test down. They load him onto the announce table so Shane can hit the top rope elbow through Test. For a non-wrestler, Shane can drop a gorgeous elbow.

The referee is back up (why did he need to be bumped? It’s a street fight) but Test kicks out at two. The fans are really getting into this. Pete accidentally hits Shane with a sign but Rodney hits Test with his cast. That’s only good for two and now the fans are fired up. Patterson and Brisco run out to take care of the Posse and make it one on one. Shane charges into the post and it’s a pumphandle slam followed by the flying elbow to get Shane out of Test and Stephanie’s lives.

Rating: B. This took a little bit to get going but the fans got into it at the end. It’s a great example of a story carrying a match rather than the wild brawling. This was full of weapon shots and interference, but the story behind the match made people care about it. The people were invested in Test and wanted to see him fight for the woman he loved. That’s a classic story and it’s going to work every time. Good stuff here.

Stephanie comes out to celebrate post match.

We recap the tag title match. With Vince having been revealed as the Higher Power, Undertaker has been dropped down to an evil tag team with Big Show. They’re challenging X-Pac and Kane, who are in the beginning of a nearly year long story. Pac is Kane’s first real friend and the other monsters hurt him, so Kane wants revenge.

Tag Titles: Kane/X-Pac vs. Big Show/Undertaker

Kane is in the always awesome inverted attire, meaning it’s more black than red. The mash-up of Big Show and Undertaker’s themes really doesn’t work at all. It’s a big brawl to start with Undertaker easily knocking X-Pac to the floor. Kane gets double teamed in the corner but he clotheslines Big Show out to the floor and Pac gets two off a high cross body to Taker. We start with X-Pac against Taker with the big man cranking on the arm. Pac escapes and wisely tags out to give us brother vs. brother.

Taker is knocked to the floor and Pac dives off the apron to take him down. The crotch chop earned X-Pac an elbow to the face and a smile from me. Kane saves him little buddy and take Undertaker down with the top rope clothesline. Taker comes right back with his running DDT but Kane is up almost immediately. Big Show comes in to throw Kane around and drops him with a superkick.

Since this is a battle of the giants it’s time for some choking but we’re not to the bearhug yet. A powerslam gets two on Kane and it’s back to Undertaker to pound away in the corner. They slug it out and both guys go down with a double clothesline. The hot tag brings in X-Pac who catches Undertaker with a spinwheel kick (actually connects) but Big Show pulls the small man down. Everything breaks down and Pac is crotched against the post. Show slams Pac down and drops a knee to his chest. The size difference is remarkable when you see them next to each other.

There’s the bearhug but X-Pac bites his way out of it. A cross between a chokeslam and the Boss Man Slam gets two for Show but Kane breaks up the chokeslam. X-Pac hits Show low and it’s off to Kane to clean house. Everything breaks down again and X-Pac sends Taker into the post. There’s a Bronco Buster to Big Show but he pops up and chokeslams X-Pac down…..for two? Taker is MAD and goes after X-Pac in the corner before ending him with a tombstone for the titles.

Rating: D. This didn’t do it for me at all. I couldn’t stand X-Pac around this time and this is a great example of why. The whole idea of his character at this point was he wouldn’t give up, which led to him beating a lot of guys FAR bigger than him. I don’t have much of a problem with X-Pac against smaller guys, but when he’s beating people Taker’s size it was very annoying. The match was an extended squash.

Jesse gives Austin the same speech.

Billy Gunn vs. The Rock

The loser has to, shall we say, kiss up to the winner. Billy brings a fat chick with him for Rock to kiss if Rock loses. Gunn jumps him to start but Rock comes back with right hands of his own to send Gunn to the floor. They head up the aisle with Billy being sent into a metal barricade. Rock is sent into it as well and clotheslined down as Billy takes over. Rock comes back with a clothesline of his own as they fight by the Lion’s Den. This is really dull stuff so far.

They head back to ringside with Gunn sending him into the steps but being rammed face first into the announce table. Rock puts the King’s crown on Billy’s head for a right hand. Back in and Billy chokes away before getting two off a neckbreaker. Gunn drops an elbow to the chest and gets two off a bulldog.

A Stinger Splash crushes Rock but he explodes out of the corner with a running clothesline. The floatover DDT takes Gunn down but Rock can’t follow up. Rock gets two off a swinging neckbreaker and a Samoan Drop but the Rock Bottom is countered into a Fameasser. The fat woman comes into the ring but Billy goes face first into her. Rock Bottom and People’s Elbow ends this a second later.

Rating: D+. What were you expecting here? Like I said, Rock was in a funk at this point and going from lame feud to lame feud with nothing for him to work with. I mean, BILLY GUNN is the best they can do for him at Summerslam? The match wasn’t terrible but it was just killing time until the very obvious ending.

We recap the main event. Chyna actually won a #1 contenders triple threat over Undertaker and HHH but HHH went on a power trip, saying it was his shot. Mankind cost HHH a one on one match against Chyna for the shot and then beat Chyna for the title shot himself. HHH attacked Mankind’s leg, leading to a fourth #1 contenders match, resulting in a double pin and a threeway tonight.

Jesse comes out first and says he’s proud to be a wrestler. Here here!

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. Mankind vs. Triple H

Triple H and Austin start fast in the ring but Mankind pulls HHH to the floor and sends him onto the announce table. All three head into the ring with HHH being ping ponged back and forth by right hands from both guys. Mankind offers Austin a handshake but gets punched in the face instead. HHH is knocked to the floor and Mankind misses a charge at Austin to send him to the outside as well.

All three are on the floor now with no one having a clear advantage. Austin clotheslines Mankind down before slugging it out with HHH, allowing Chyna (HHH’s manager) to send Mankind into the post. Jesse tries to separate Chyna and Mankind as HHH hits Austin’s bad knee with a chair. Ventura asks the crowd if HHH hit Steve with a chair but doesn’t do anything about it once they say yes. Mankind is back in now but gets pounded down in the corner by HHH.

A quick Mandible Claw slows HHH down but Chyna breaks it up by crotching Mankind on the post. That earns her an ejection and a lecture from Ventura. Austin is back up now and pounding away on HHH in the aisle. They fight back to ringside where Austin’s bad knee is wrapped around the post. A chop block puts Austin down but Mankind is getting back up again. He breaks up a stomping from HHH to Austin, only so he can stomp Austin instead. Now they stomp Austin together to a loud chorus of boos.

HHH puts on a spinning toe hold but breaks up a cover attempt by Mankind, starting a fight between the two of them. HHH is knocked to the floor but Mankind misses a dive off the apron. Austin’s knee is almost wrapped around the post again but Mankind intercept it and brawls with HHH into the crowd. A piledriver on the concrete is broken up and Austin fights HHH again. Everyone heads back inside and there’s a low blow from Austin to HHH.

The Stunner takes down Mankind but HHH breaks it up with a chair shot. Ventura yells at HHH about it before HHH knocks Mankind out with the chair as well. HHH covers Mankind but Jesse isn’t counting a cover off an illegal move like that. Shane runs in to plead HHH’s case but gets Stunned for his efforts. Ventura throws Shane out but HHH and Steve clothesline each other down. Mankind loads up Socko and both guys get a mouthful of it but Austin kicks Mankind low to break it up.

HHH loads up the Pedigree on Mankind but Austin clotheslines HHH down to break it up. Austin punches both of his challengers and hits a Stunner on HHH but Mankind breaks up the count at two. Austin sends Mankind into the post but walks into the Pedigree. Mankind pops back up though and knocks HHH down before hitting the double arm DDT on Austin for the pin and the title in a surprise.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t all that great of a match. At the end of the day it was a pretty slow paced brawl and HHH wasn’t on this level yet. Still though, it wasn’t terrible and Jesse added some good moments to the match. This wouldn’t wind up meaning much for reasons I’ll get into in a bit. It’s a nice moment though.

Post match HHH destroys Austin and his knee with a chair, putting him on the shelf for a month.

Overall Rating: D+. This show is a product of the times and political issues kept it from having the big moment it was looking for. HHH was scheduled to win the title to end the show but Jesse didn’t want to raise a heel’s hand to end the show. The title change would take place the next night on Raw and HHH would have his first title defense on a new show called Smackdown later this week. The show is totally forgettable though with only the street fight and the main event being notable at all. Not worth seeing but there are worse shows.

Ratings Comparison

Jeff Jarrett vs. D’Lo Brown

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Tag Team Turmoil

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Big Boss Man vs. Al Snow

Original: B

Redo: C

Ivory vs. Tori

Original: F

Redo: F+

Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Blackman

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Shane McMahon vs. Test

Original: B

Redo: B

Unholy Alliance vs. X-Pac/Kane

Original: D+

Redo: D

Billy Gunn vs. The Rock

Original: B-

Redo: D+

HHH vs. Steve Austin vs. Mankind

Original: B+

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: D+

WOW and I thought 1990 was screwed up.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/03/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1999-the-body/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6