Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: July 27, 2015
Uh…..I really don’t have much of an intro here. We’re coming up on Summerslam and this is one of the Raw’s on the way there. Let’s get to it.
The big opening talking segment was, of course, the Authority and Seth Rollins. The idea of this one was to make Raw a night of first, including Big Show vs. Dean Ambrose. In the words of Jon Stewart, let me stop you right there. Much like a lot of these first time EVER matches, just because it’s never happened before doesn’t mean that it’s a good idea. I mean, we could have Blake from NXT come up and fight Hornswoggle. IT’S NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE so that makes it cool right? I don’t know of anyone who would go out of their way to see Big Show vs. Ambrose, nor do I see a lot of fans being happy with the outcome.
Other than that, we’re also getting, FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER SO YOU KNOW IT’S AWESOME: Kevin Owens vs. Randy Orton, Paige vs. Sasha Banks (well for the first time on Raw at least) and Alicia Fox/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Charlotte. In other words we have “man Owens gets to lose again?”, “that could be good” and “well at least we have something to look at.” This is their big solution for the ratings being so far down?
Finally, Rollins ran his mouth for a long time until Cena came down and thought he should get a title shot against Rollins for the first time ever on Raw. HHH thought it was a great idea but made it a US Title shot instead, which pretty much sealed the winner, or at least who was walking out with the title, as soon as the words were out of his mouth. We’ll come back to the match later for a change, but the talking segment took too long to get to the point.
Big Show beat Dean Ambrose via countout, with the idea being that Ambrose kept fighting but couldn’t put Big Show down. I like the plan, but Big Show has lost to people like Miz recently. So Miz is tougher/smarter than Ambrose? I don’t know of anyone who would buy that but it’s what we’re supposed to believe now?
In theory they’re building up Big Show for someone, but they could have given anyone a rub with the same ending. Ambrose looks weaker than usual by comparison but we’re supposed to cheer him anyway because Dean is bulletproof, which WWE interprets as loss proof. Dean sidestepping a post match spear was supposed to make up for it or something but as is so typically the case, it doesn’t work like WWE thinks it does.
Neville beat Fandango and listened to Stardust rant about saving the WWE Universe from false hope. The more I see of this feud the more I like it, but I have a bad feeling they won’t get enough time at Summerslam. You know, the FOUR HOUR show.
Paige and Sasha traded some insults before Sasha made Paige tap clean. This was a solid, long match with some arm work for a story, but more important than anything else, the match felt important. I wanted to see where it was going instead of having two girls out there to waste everyone’s time. That’s a major step forward and a completely new way to look at the division.
Rusev gave Summer Rae a dog named Ziggler and a fish with no head. Lana came out, beat Summer up and shoved her face into the fish. I really don’t think this needs any further explanation.
The Lucha Dragons beat Los Matadores as the Prime Time Players were on commentary. This was little more than an excuse to have the New Day come out, though it seems to set up a multi-team title match at Summerslam. The idea is fine, but again it makes last week’s loss look like a waste of time.
Bray Wyatt and Luke Harper did a long in ring promo where they talked about Harper coming home. Since this was Wyatt though, it took him five minutes to get to the point, even though we knew the point in the first place. It was still effective though and you can feel the old Wyatt vibes coming back. Now, that being said, none of it matters if the Wyatts are treated like jobbers all over the place, especially Bray himself.
Becky Lynch/Charlotte beat Nikki Bella/Alicia Fox in a match taking place FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER when Lynch made Fox tap. As usual, there was nothing of note involving Nikki because she isn’t the longest reigning Divas Champion yet and therefore nothing can happen, at least not until there’s roughly a week before the record is broken.
Kevin Owens and Randy Orton had a pretty lame match until Sheamus came in for the DQ. Owens is pretty firmly in that transitional period between main eventer and midcard but you can see him trending down. Cesaro came in for a save but ate a powerbomb, likely setting up a tag match at some point in the near future. There’s nothing wrong with combining two feuds into one.
The big main event was a good fight between Cena and Rollins where Cena retained the US Title. They beat each other up and put on an entertaining match as you would expect, but of course the story here is John Cena’s nose, which pretty much erupted due to a knee to the face.
The big question now is whether Cena is going to be back for Summerslam. They never actually announced Cena vs. Rollins for the pay per view, but at least there’s an easy reason why Cena isn’t fighting. Everyone say the nose and it was hardly something you could hide. Keep Cena off TV until Summerslam if you can, but if you can’t……I’m really not sure what you do. Make Undertaker vs. Lesnar a triple threat with Rollins for the title I guess, because there aren’t a lot of other options, unless you throw Orton out there again. I mean, it’s not like you can give someone new a shot right?
This show was a copy of last week’s but with Cena and Rollins in Lesnar and Undertaker’s places. They’re both one idea shows with some midcard stuff thrown in, and that’s all these shows should have been. The main event and what should be the other main event assuming Cena can breathe by then are both set and you can build the rest of the card from here. It’s one of those shows where you knew what was going to happen from the opening bell but there’s nothing wrong with that. Good, effective show this week.
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Monday Night Raw – July 27, 2015: On The Middle Of The Road To Summerslam
Monday Night Raw Date: July 27, 2015
Location: Chesapeake Energy Arena, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield
Summerslam is still coming and tonight’s big question is what is going to co-headline the show alongside the showdown between Brock Lesnar and Undertaker. Seth Rollins vs. John Cena in a champion vs. champion match has been teased, but it would be interesting to see if Cena holds onto the title until Summerslam. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of last week’s big brawl between Undertaker and Lesnar with the entire roster trying to keep them apart.
Here’s the Authority and Seth Rollins to open the show. HHH says this is a night of firsts and we’re going to start with a major announcements. For the first time ever, Summerslam is going to be a special four hour event, of course with Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar as the main event. Tonight is going to be something special tonight as well as Big Show goes one on one with Dean Ambrose. That’s uh, quite the announcement there Trips.
On top of that we have Paige vs. Sasha Banks and Kevin Owens vs. Randy Orton. Stephanie brings up the Divas Revolution with Alicia Fox/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Charlotte. Rollins takes the mic and brags about how amazing he is, calling himself one of the greatest WWE Champions of all time, but here’s John Cena to disagree. Cena doesn’t like the idea of Rollins calling himself the greatest of all time because Rollins is a joke. On a night like tonight, we need to find out which one of them is right.
If tonight is a night of firsts, we need to find out if Seth Rollins really is a man, so how about Cena vs. Rollins for the World Title tonight? Seth says Cena needs to earn a shot but Stephanie wants to put it up to the people because she can’t remember if she’s a face or a heel. The fans love the idea and even start a YES chant so Stephanie says NO, complete with a little dance. HHH thinks the idea has merit though so instead it’s going to be a US Title match with Rollins having the chance to be a dual champion.
The Austin Podcast returns next week with……Paige? That’s not quite Taker or Sting but at least they look better in leather shorts.
Dean Ambrose vs. Big Show
This is actually fallout from two weeks ago on Smackdown where Ambrose countered Big Show’s chokeslam through a table with a DDT. Miz is on commentary, almost guaranteeing Ambrose loses because WWE doesn’t think stuff through. Show takes him into the corner to start and rips Dean’s shirt open before running him over with a shoulder. The fans aren’t pleased and it’s nice to see that last week’s promo wasn’t meant to be yet another face turn.
Dean low bridges him to the floor and a baseball slide sets up a suicide dive but dives into a chop as we take a WAY too early break. Back with Show working on the leg but has to stop to tie his boot. Miz rants about Ryback missing time, because he could beat up a staph infection. Ambrose’s sleeper has as much effect as anyone’s sleeper has on Big Show (we need the tranquilizer dart that Angle used) and Show goes old school with the Alley Oop for two. Another chokeslam is countered with another DDT but the rebound lariat is countered with the chokeslam for two.
Show does the smart thing by just chokeslamming him again but Dean rolls to the floor to lay in the light of the video screen because THE RING SKIRT IS A VIDEO SCREEN. Yes I know it has been for a long time but it looks stupid. Dean gets back in but a superkick puts him on the floor again, setting up a spear to flatten Dean one more time. Ambrose dives in at nine, only to be thrown outside for a third time in two minutes. This time Show throws him inside but Dean kicks him away for a suicide dive. Show is waiting for him with the KO Punch though and it’s a countout at 10:30.
Rating: D+. WHAT??? Did we really just watch Dean Ambrose get beaten up by Big Show for ten minutes before they finally just let Big Show knock him out? Are we really back to the annual Big Show push that no one but WWE wants to see? I mean, at least it’s not a pin but my goodness WWE: stop doing this. The guy is 43 years old and going over Dean Ambrose on Raw.
Dean still won’t stay down so Show loads up a spear, which goes right through the barricade instead. Ah so he’s a smart loser.
Neville vs. Fandango
Fandango tries a powerbomb but opts for a clothesline instead. JBL: “When in doubt, hit your opponent really hard.” A Gory Stretch of all things has Neville in trouble but he comes back with his series of quick strikes. Having never watched a Neville match, Fandango heads outside in front of the ramp, setting up the big flip dive. Back inside and the Red Arrow is good for the pin on Fandango at 1:54.
Post match, Stardust comes on screen and rips up a comic book while talking about wining and dining with kings and queens. No one wants to talk about the strange but don’t worry because he’ll rescue the WWE Universe and there is nothing Neville can do to stop him.
Paige gives Charlotte and Becky Lynch a pep talk when Team Bad comes in to trade insults. Paige wins by saying she was the first NXT Women’s Champion.
Sasha Banks vs. Paige
Non-title. Sasha’s Sky’s The Limit theme makes its Raw debut here. Their lockup goes to the mat and then out to the floor without a break. Back in and Paige fires off her elbows in the corner, followed by a fall away slam for two. We hit the hammerlock (nice little change of pace) before Paige drives Banks down into a Fujiwara armbar. Sasha tries to fight up but eats a superkick to put her on the floor with Paige diving on all of Team Bad as we take a break.
Back with Sasha holding a chinlock as everyone else has been ejected from ringside. The double knees to the chest in the corner get two and it’s back to the chinlock with Paige in trouble. That doesn’t last long though as Paige fights up and fires off a series of knees in the corner and the trio of clotheslines. A superkick looks to set up the PTO but instead it’s another knee to Sasha’s chest for two. Sasha hits a charge in the corner for two of her own, followed by a sloppy Bank Statement for the clean tap at 13:57.
Rating: B-. It’s not a classic or anything, but this was the first time in a LONG time that a women’s match on Raw actually felt serious instead of WWE trying to make it feel serious. This felt like a wrestling match between two very talented women and that’s not something you get from the Divas. This is a positive sign going forward and a huge win for Banks.
Rollins says he’ll win tonight because he beats the best that WWE throws at him every single time. Tonight, the future passes Cena by.
The Terminator (yes that Terminator) is in WWE 2K16.
Here are Rusev and Lana for a chat. Rusev says he’s smitten with her and wants to give Summer a present. First up: a puppy, who is so ugly that they have to name him Dog Ziggler. The second present is…..a headless fish. It’s a cold fish, so let’s name it Lana. Cue the real Lana who rants about Rusev trying to humiliate her. She should be ranting about how her accent slips a bit as she talks faster.
Lana goes on about Summer being a Lana ripoff and how Rusev is just trying to replace the real thing. Lana kicks Summer in the leg and put on an armbar while ripping at Summer’s hair. Summer goes face first into the fish and Lana leaves. This was, in a word, really stupid.
We see the same recap the opened the show. Saxton says Lesnar is back next week in the city that hosted last year’s Wrestlemania: San Jose, California.
Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores
The Prime Time Players are on commentary and this match is to move up the tag team rankings. Cara and Diego flip around to start before the Dragons double team Diego down for two. Kalisto slaps on an armbar as Titus makes fun of Darren’s shyness on commentary. It’s Diego coming back with a running clothesline to take over but Kalisto grabs the arm again to stop the comeback.
Cara’s springboard cross body is caught in midair and they drop him face first onto the post. Even Torito gets in some cheap shots (Titus: “THAT’S BULL!”) as Titus and JBL argue over Puerto Rican bullfighters. Fernando’s chinlock has Cara in more trouble and the slow offense continues with a front facelock. Who thought it was a good idea for a lucha team to wrestle a slow paced mat style?
Cara gets in a belly to back for a breather and the hot tag brings in Kalisto for a springboard tornado DDT. Cara swantons onto Diego on the floor but we’ve got New Day, with a sign saying Kofi is the REAL Mega Dad of the Year. Kalisto grabs a huricanrana for the pin on Diego at 8:05.
Rating: D+. So not only was it slow, but they’re basically saying that match last week where the champions lost means nothing because they just lost clean to another team. New Day vs. the Players isn’t much of a feud but it’s finally feeling like a story instead of just two teams having matches because the script says they should be.
Here are Wyatt and Harper with something to say. Well one of them with something to say at least. Bray thinks everyone here has a family and thinks most people here love their family. There’s this idea that if a family stays together, they can survive anything. That’s a lie though man. It’s a shame that people won’t tell their family the truth.
It’s in your house, your government and your places of worship: those that trust you the most are the ones you should fear the most. The truth shall set you free, but freedom comes at a very hefty price. A long time ago, Bray had a pet. It wasn’t the most charming one but Bray loved him all the same. That pet wanted to know what was over the hills and across the train tracks, so one day Bray loosened his chains and the pet ran away.
One day he came back, but the pet was different, partially because of a scar alongside his eye. The pet never left his side, but it would never be the same. That brings him to Harper, who was a damaged man that Bray picked up from the dirt and fixed him like a broken toy. One day, Bray knew he would have to set Harper free, but now Harper has come home. Harper says he didn’t know why he existed or why he was here, but his family found him.
Bray showed him the truth: this is all the people’s fault. They made him what he is when they shunned him but Bray saved him. When you pray for the rain, you best be prepared for the mud. Harper is ready to give his life for Bray, and Bray says he knows Harper would go through anything for him. That brings Wyatt back to Roman Reigns, who was told that this was just the beginning. If Reigns really cared for Dean Ambrose, he would tell Dean that he was in danger. This is Reigns’ hill to die on and Bray himself will seal Reigns’ fate. We’re here. Follow the buzzards.
Alicia Fox/Nikki Bella vs. Becky Lynch/Charlotte
Becky runs Nikki over to start before it’s off to Charlotte for a twisting rollup (Charlotte’s Web) for two. Off to Fox who has similar success as Charlotte drops a knee to the head. Nikki offers a distraction so Fox can get two off a northern lights suplex. Nikki comes back in for her pushups and some laughter before it’s off to Fox for a double arm crank with her feet in Charlotte’s back. She pulls on it so hard that Charlotte flips over onto her for two, allowing for the tag off to Becky. A t-bone suplex sends Fox flying as everything breaks down. Lynch’s Disarm-Her armbar makes Fox tap at 6:10.
Rating: C. Totally fine match here with no one really standing out. Again, the problem here is the lack of any reason for these matches to be taking place as no one can challenge for the title until AJ’s record comes down. The problem is we don’t really have a reason for the title to be a non-factor, but that’s life in WWE for you.
Look back at last week’s Tough Enough elimination and a list of the remaining competitors.
Randy Orton vs. Kevin Owens
Sheamus is on commentary. Owens jaws a lot to start and they slug it out with Randy knocking him outside early on. Back in and Orton rakes his boot over Kevin’s face but Owens rolls right back to the floor. It’s Orton being sent face first into the post and a fall away slam to launch him into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Owens getting two off the backsplash but walking into Orton’s backbreaker to even things up.
It’s Owens staying in control though and slugging away in the corner, setting up the Cannonball but Orton rolls away. The powerslam plants Owens and the t-bone suplex does the same (Orton must have been watching the Divas tag). They fight to the floor again and it’s a Brogue Kick to Orton for the DQ at 11:06.
Rating: C. I wasn’t really feeling this one but at least Owens looked like someone who could go toe to toe with a guy on Orton’s level. I don’t think he’s going to be back to the level he reached when he debuted for a good while, but there’s a big difference between being forgotten/buried and what we’re seeing here.
Post match Sheamus goes after Orton but Cesaro runs in to get his hands on Owens. Sheamus offers a distraction though and Owens powerbombs Cesaro and spits on him.
Cena says he’s been defending this title for months now but tonight he’s up against the golden boy and the WWE World Heavyweight Champion. If Rollins is as good as he says he is, then he can shock the world.
US Title: John Cena vs. Seth Rollins
Cena is defending and for the sake of simplicity, I’ll only refer to Cena as the champion. A quick shoulder puts Rollins on the floor and things slow right back down. Back in and an AA attempt is countered, allowing Rollins to kick him down to take over. Rollins slaps on a chinlock and we take a break. Back with Cena fighting out of the chinlock (dang that must have been a dull commercial break) but missing a charge in the corner.
Cena comes back and tries his finishing sequence, only to have Rollins kick him in the head/shoulder for two. The Shuffle is broken up by another kick to the head but Cena avoids a corner dive of his own, setting up a tornado DDT for two on Seth. The top rope knee to the head gets two on the champ but Cena catches him in an electric chair for two. Another knee to the nose puts Cena in the corner but we stop to check for blood (which is flowing from his nose. It could be broken).
Thankfully Cena will have none of that but Rollins kicks him in the head, setting up the buckle bomb for two. The doctor comes in to look at the nose but Cena is right back up with the springboard Stunner. Rollins flips out of the AA though and the low superkick gets a very close two. Fans: “THIS IS AWESOME.” Not really guys.
An AA gets two (that should be a drinking game) and Cena gets his nose looked at again. A closeup shows that the nose is definitely broken as it’s off to one side. Cena gets superplexed off the top and Rollins floats over into a falcon’s arrow for two. The fans are getting way into these kickouts. Rollins misses the Phoenix Splash and it’s off to the STF for the tap at 17:05.
Rating: B. Well there’s the Summerslam co-main event. I’m guessing they’ll go with Rollins saying he had nothing to lose which is about as acceptable as you can get but I’m never a fan of these endings. Cena vs. Rollins for the World Title at Summerslam is fine as there isn’t really anyone else to go for the belt, but I’m hoping Cena drops the US Title before the show. Good but not great main event here.
Overall Rating: C+. I’m kind of split on this one. The wrestling isn’t bad and the show flew by, but there’s really nothing worth talking about. This really was a show that didn’t do anything bad (Big Show beating Ambrose aside) and started setting up stuff for Summerslam. We’ve already got Brock vs. Taker set so you really don’t need to focus on it all that much. It’s a pretty middle of the road show but it went by quickly and got some things done so we’ll say it’s a good week.
Results
Big Show b. Dean Ambrose via countout
Neville b. Fandango – Red Arrow
Sasha Banks b. Paige – Bank Statement
Lucha Dragons b. Los Matadores – Hurricanrana to Diego
Becky Lynch/Charlotte b. Nikki Bella/Alicia Fox – Disarm-Her to Fox
Randy Orton b. Kevin Owens via DQ when Sheamus interfered
John Cena b. Seth Rollins – STF
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Reviewing the Review: Monday Night Raw – July 20, 2015
This one could be interesting as I barely remember the show as I was falling asleep due to a long day of traveling. This is the fallout show from Battleground where Undertaker returned (again. There’s probably a three disc set of Undertaker returns ready to be made) to go after Brock Lesnar and set up the main event of Summerslam. We’re on the road to the second biggest show of the year so let’s get to it.
They opened as they should have, with Undertaker coming out and saying streaks are made to be broken. The gist of this was Undertaker being annoyed at Heyman and Lesnar for bragging about breaking the Streak over and over for the last fifteen months. To be fair, it is getting a bit old. The big story later in the night would be Heyman coming out to brag even more when Undertaker appeared, triggering a massive brawl, broken up by the locker room.
There isn’t much to say here because the whole thing was awesome, but more importantly, they let it feel awesome. They let this thing feel like a brawl between two monsters, but I’m not sure how the match is going to go. Do you really want Undertaker to get suplexed all over the place? Undertaker isn’t going to be a heel in this match no matter what they do, and thankfully they didn’t seem to be trying to make him one. Anyway, the segments really worked and the match should be good, though I emphasize should.
Oh and there was something about the Authority wanting to prevent the match from being broken up. I stop caring when they’re talking most of the time so I’m not sure what their issue was.
Charlotte beat Brie Bella in a totally watchable match. Brie still isn’t great in the ring and probably never will be, but she’s to the point where she can have a watchable match with someone talented like Charlotte. Also, nice touch on not having Charlotte get beaten yet, though I have a feeling she will when she comes up against Nikki because All Hail The Bellas.
Los Matadores beat the Prime Time Players in a non-title match because there was nothing better to do than to have New Day distract the champions so the low level team can beat them in a match that isn’t going to lead anywhere.
Big Show beat Miz in a quick match that I think was supposed to make us care about the giant again. He then challenged Ryback to a fight on Tough Enough to try to make people watch it. It says a lot when Big Show is considered a draw.
Roman Reigns beat Luke Harper via DQ when Bray Wyatt interfered. This seems to be setting up a tag match at Summerslam with Ambrose coming in to help out his brother. I’d be interested in seeing them bring in a third man each, but bringing in Sting would be one of the lamest ideas they could have as it would overshadow the story they’re shooting for with Reigns vs. Wyatt, as well as making people clamor for Wyatt vs. Sting because they’re both supernatural or something and that instantly means you would want to see them fight.
Rollins bragged about keeping the title, Cena came out and said Rollins needed to take the title more seriously, and nothing else happened. I’m really hoping they’re not setting up champion vs. champion, but given how the ratings have been going, it seems like we’re getting back towards Cena on top as he’s the only one that can really move things these days. And since the idea of ever pushing anyone as a big star is foreign to WWE, this is what we’re stuck with for now.
Sasha Banks and Naomi beat Paige and Becky Lynch in another pretty good match. This actually got thirteen minutes and didn’t feel long, which is more than you would ever expect out of a Divas match. The division has gotten the big boost that it needs, but they really need to go somewhere with it in the next few weeks. There’s more than enough time to have it be the big blow away story they need and thankfully Stephanie hasn’t been a thing for the most part.
The main event was a six man tag with Cena/Orton/Cesaro beating Sheamus/Owens/Rusev in a match that actually tied things up in a nice package to end the show. That’s not something you often see but it worked well enough one time. Other than that though, the big story was Owens and Sheamus walking out on their partner, leaving Rusev to take a big beating. Combine this with Rusev being the default face in his match with Owens on Smackdown and……no I don’t think they’re turning Rusev.
Owens leaving makes sense as he lives to fight another day and I guess the same is true for Sheamus, though it’s still not the best result in the world. Based on what happened on Smackdown we’re going to get Cesaro vs. Owens at Summerslam and since we just NEED the Ziggler vs. Rusev showdown, there’s no turning it into a triple threat. It would be nice to have a title for them to fight over, but we need champion vs. champion for reasons that aren’t entirely clear.
Overall Raw was just kind of there with almost all of the focus being on Undertaker vs. Lesnar. Rollins will have his day soon enough and a win over Cena at one of the biggest show of the year would help him a lot, though I have a feeling Cena would get the title to make things all better again.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
I’ll be back to the normal schedule next week so just one more early Smackdown, unless you like them early. I normally have them done before the show is on the air and could easily post them early if you prefer. Let me know which way you like me doing them.
Smackdown Date: July 16, 2015
Location: Legacy Arena, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Jimmy Uso, Jerry Lawler
It’s the go home show for Battleground and this past Monday’s show saw the destruction of Kane at the hands of Brock Lesnar, meaning Seth Rollins is all alone on Sunday. My guess is that this week’s show will focus on Wyatt vs. Reigns, which is all but set yet still needs a few more details. Like why Wyatt is doing anything and why he just dropped the stuff with Reigns’ daughter. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here’s Reigns to open the show. This all started at Money in the Bank when Wyatt cost him the match, but Bray isn’t in his head and Bray can’t break his focus. Tonight we have Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns vs. Big Show/Sheamus and it’s time to start a fight, but here’s Bray on screen to interrupt. He asks what gave Roman the right to go after him on Monday, but Wyatt knew Reigns was there. For a moment, Bray was just like these people. For once, he saw Reigns being exactly what he should have been.
Bray saw him as a stone monument, but at Battleground, he will be the hammer that breaks the monument down. Reigns is ready to fight but Bray says this is what true fear feels like. Collect your roses gladiator because none of them are real. What is real though is that Bray is back here with everyone Reigns cares about. He’s capable of some very evil things and this game has just begun. Wyatt has been trying to bring the fire out of Reigns and knows he’ll get bitten by the big dog. One day though, he’ll tell the dog to sit and the dog will obey. Roman needs to go kiss the people he cares about because anyone but him.
This helped and is probably as clear of a reason as we’re going to get as to why Wyatt has targeted Reigns. I’m still not clear on why his daughter is involved, but maybe the idea is that Reigns isn’t what he seems and Wyatt wants to expose him as a fraud? It all started with Reigns in an ad for being a great father so maybe Bray thinks that’s not the real Reigns?
New Day vs. Lucha Dragons
The champs are on commentary of course with Woods as the odd man out. Kofi flips over Cara to start but Cara does the exact same thing. Off to E. vs. Kalisto, with the latter hitting a nice springboard wristdrag/headscissors to take New Day down and we take an early break.
Back with New Day stomping in the corner and Titus thinking this would be a fun triple threat match on Sunday. Kofi hurricanranas Cara down and Kalisto gets knocked off the apron for not paying attention. The abdominal stretch keeps Cara in trouble but he finally dives over Big E. and makes the hot tag to Kalisto. Everything breaks down and the Salida Del Sol plants Big E., only to have Kofi break up Cara’s swanton. The Midnight Hour ends Kalisto at 10:06.
Rating: C-. Phillips saying that the New Day is on a roll tells you how lame the division has become again in recent weeks. Assuming they win on Sunday, New Day is stuck sitting around waiting on the Usos to come back and then……well then I have no idea where they’re going. I see no reason to believe the Players keep the titles as the lame father of the year award “hype” is over so there’s no reason to have Titus as a champion anymore.
New Day says they’ll win on Sunday and change the chant up to “NEW! TAG CHAMPS!” The Players chase them off without violence. At least they made the match feel a little more important.
Reigns and Ambrose are ready to take care of Sheamus and Big Show because they both want to get rid of Wyatt. Dean says he hates everyone.
King Barrett vs. Jack Swagger
This is how far Barrett has fallen. Swagger rides him to the mat to start but Barrett punches him in the face a few times. The announcers of course treat this match as a joke by talking about Barrett’s nose, because that’s what Barrett is these days. An attempt at the Vader Bomb doesn’t get to launch so Swagger slams him into the apron, only to get kicked in the ribs. The Bullhammer ends Swagger at 2:35.
Post match Truth comes out so they can shout over each other. Barrett says this has gone on long enough (amen) because he’s the real King of the Ring. Truth on the other hand is just another guy who lost in the same tournament, which really isn’t helping me care about this feud. Barrett promises to make Truth bow on Sunday.
Recap of Lesnar vs. Rollins, focusing on various beatdowns of both Lesnar and the car.
Cesaro runs into Kevin Owens, who wishes him luck in his match.
Rusev vs. Cesaro
This should be on pay per view but that’s what Smackdown is for these days. They shove each other around to start with Cesaro getting the better of it, only to have Rusev punch him in the face to take over. Rusev loads up a suplex but Cesaro will have none of that as he reverses into one of his own. I could watch Cesaro throw people around all day.
A snap belly to back suplex drops Cesaro again but he rolls some quick Germans for a breather. Back from a break with Cesaro fighting out of a chinlock and a clip of the slam into the spinout Rock Bottom from Rusev during the commercial. The uppercuts stagger Rusev and a nice dropkick puts him on the floor. There isn’t much to talk about here as this is quite the back and forth power brawl so far.
Back in and the spinwheel kick stops Cesaro cold but he comes right back with a Neutralizer attempt. Rusev backdrops him down though and nails a superkick. The Accolade doesn’t work either though, setting up a USA chant. Jimmy: “I know what’s about to happen King!” They head outside again where Cesaro charges into another superkick. Jimmy: “I didn’t know that was about to happen King!” Rusev goes up top but dives into an “uppercut” (barely connected and looked awkward), setting up the Neutralizer to give Cesaro the pin at 12:40. Cesaro is the second person to ever pin Rusev in WWE.
Rating: B. Now THAT is more like it. This was treated as a big deal and actually felt like one with the commentators pointing out that Rusev has never been pinned on Smackdown (or on TV ever I believe). Cesaro comes off like a big deal, but at the moment he isn’t scheduled to be in action at the pay per view. It’s a shame that another bald power guy who happens to hold a title isn’t injured, leaving a spot open for a title match that Cesaro could say, win on Sunday, leaving him to do this every week on Smackdown like Daniel Bryan was scheduled to do.
Cesaro jumps into the crowd to celebrate.
Sheamus says Sunday is just another day at the office. Tonight he gets to team with a giant and he hopes Orton is watching the beating that Ambrose and Reigns receive. What is WWE’s obsession with Sheamus vs. Orton? They’ve never had anything resembling a good match so they keep getting pushed because they look like a good match on paper? To be fair it wouldn’t be the first time WWE has done something because it sounded good and continued to do so after it failed time after time.
Stardust vs. Neville
Rematch from Raw where Neville lost in what is being billed as a battle of comic book characters, complete with comic page backgrounds on the recap. Stardust drops him with a quick forearm, only to be sent to the floor for the Asai moonsault. Back in and Stardust gets caught holding the ropes on a sunset flip, allowing to pop back up with a victory roll for the pin at 2:20. The good vs. evil concept works and I like Neville being treated as a superhero, but the matches aren’t lighting anything on fire, let alone the world.
After a break, Neville says his strategy was just to wait for his window of opportunity to open and then strike. Stardust decks him and says prepare for turbulence during the Altitude Era.
Long recap of the Divas’ segment from Raw. It still focuses on Stephanie and therefore it’s still not as good as it could be. It’s still great, but it shouldn’t have been about her.
Sasha/Tamina/Naomi say it’s finally fair because the odds are even. Sasha says it’s their time to run this division. Naomi: “We bad.” They’re the trifecta and they’re not here to make friends or play nice.
Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns vs. Big Show/Sheamus
Dean rides Sheamus to the mat to start but Sheamus knees him in the back to take over. That goes nowhere as Dean runs Sheamus over and knocks Show to the floor, setting up the standing elbow drop to both. We come back from a break with Reigns coming in to face off with Big Show because IT WILL NEVER DIE! It’s quickly back to Dean to hammer on Big Show in the corner but Sheamus gets in a shot to take over as we’re firmly in the Smackdown main event formula.
Show punches him in the ribs a few times, which the announcers equate to drowning. The Final Cut gets two and makes me remember that the Final Cut used to be a move. An elbow finally misses and it’s a double tag to Reigns and Sheamus with the former cleaning house as you would expect. Big Show offers a distraction though, allowing Sheamus to get two off White Noise. Dean’s suicide dive is caught by Big Show but the chokeslam through the table is countered into a DDT to put everyone down again. Reigns wins a slugout with Sheamus and hits the Superman Punch but Wyatt comes in for the DQ at 13:52.
Rating: C-. Dull but fine match here as we were just waiting for Bray to run in. I do however like that no one actually jobbed three days before a pay per view because there’s no logical reason to have someone get pinned going into a major match. Also, how nice was it to see someone stay down from a DDT for a change? It was a big spot and they treated it like one for a change. That’s a rare delicacy, as sad as that really is.
Overall Rating: C+. This is the kind of show they needed to shore things up before Battleground. The World Title match has long since been set so tonight was mostly about setting up everything else, but I’m curious to see where they go with the Intercontinental Title situation. You would think Neville vs. Stardust would be added to the pre-show, but I can’t accept the idea of Cesaro not being on the main card. He’s earned a spot doing something there and if he’s left off for something stupid, it’s going to be a shame. The Divas have to get something in there too so Sunday could look very interesting.
Results
New Day b. Lucha Dragons – Midnight Hour to Kalisto
King Barrett b. Jack Swagger – Bullhammer
Cesaro b. Rusev – Neutralizer
Neville b. Stardust – Victor roll
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. Sheamus/Big Show via DQ when Bray Wyatt interfered
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Sounds legit. I’d assume we get Miz vs. Big Show or a talking segment, but I’d love it if their time was given to Cesaro and/or Rusev. Those guys deserve it after their performances Monday, and I’m sure a lot of fans will be annoyed if they don’t make it on but Barrett vs. Truth for the crown makes it instead.
Smackdown – July 9, 2015: I’ll Have The Special
Same as last week as I won’t be able to post the full thing tonight so here it is in advance.
Smackdown Date: July 9, 2015
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Jimmy Uso, Jerry Lawler
We’re back after this Monday’s classic of Cena vs. Cesaro and Lesnar squashing a Cadillac with….maybe Cesaro and Rollins if we’re lucky. My guess is we’ll get more of a focus on Reigns vs. Wyatt, which is a far more interesting story than the World Title situation. Hopefully the wrestling will be good. Let’s get to it.
The opening recap is a long video on Lesnar vs. Rollins, with Cena vs. Cesaro not warranting air time.
Here’s Rollins to open things up by calling Lesnar a coward. Luckily we’re treated to a JUSTIN BIEBER chant because that’s a full time thing now. Rollins rants about the destroyed Cadillac but here’s Paul Heyman with a tow truck hauling out the remnants. Heyman says you can’t treat Lesnar like Rollins did and not expect to be taken to Suplex City.
Both say that the car is a metaphor for their opponent (or client’s opponent) in a good exchange. Rollins brings up the whole destroying the Shield thing but Heyman promises Lesnar putting his foot on Seth’s chest as he holds up his new title. Seth cuts him off again and promises to keep the title. This was basic stuff but it’s why they have Heyman with Lesnar though. If Brock can’t be around, just throw Heyman out there to do the talking.
Dean Ambrose vs. Bo Dallas
In case Monday’s squash didn’t do it for you I guess. Before the match, Bo takes credit for the success of Rock’s new HBO series Ballers. Ambrose works on a hammerlock to start but Dallas sends him into the post three times in a row. Some choking with the ring skirt (that’s something you don’t see to often) sets up Bo’s belly to belly (his old finisher) for two and we take a break. Back with Dean fighting out of a chinlock and firing away against the ropes. We get a big surprise as Bo runs the ropes for a belly to belly superplex, followed by a Downward Spiral for two. That goes nowhere so Dirty Deeds finishes Bo at 9:07.
Rating: C-. Bo surprised me here a bit and it’s been cool to see him working extra hard lately, dating back to the match against Neville on pay per view. Ambrose is still looking for his next feud and you almost have to assume it’s going to be against Reigns because, simply put, who else is there?
Big Show tells Rollins to take care of Lesnar and promises to take out Reigns tonight. Man I thought we were past that mess.
Recap of Rusev putting Ziggler out on Raw.
Fandango vs. Rusev
Rusev has shoes now, which is a very smart mandate for him. Fandango scores with a headscissors to start as Jimmy brings up Rusev wearing boots after Tom and Jerry spent thirty seconds talking about it during Rusev’s entrance. This is every Rusev match before he feuded with Cena: a nerve hold, no selling Fandango’s comeback, the superkick and the Accolade for the submission at 3:15.
Rating: D. Hey, Rusev is back. I think that sums up the whole thing here as it was just a quick squash with a bunch of shots of Summer Rae to make things a bit easier to sit through. Summer works fine as a gold digger, even if Rusev doesn’t have a ton of gold at the moment. Make Rusev a monster again and he’ll be fine.
Roman Reigns vs. Big Show
Remember what I said about being fine? Forget all of that here. Show is now in a sleeveless black shirt instead of the singlet top. Reigns gets thrown around to start and Show shoves him out to the floor. The giant gets posted for an eight count and it’s time for Reigns’ clotheslines, because where would we be without a series of clotheslines? The Superman Punch is loaded up but we’ve got a fake Wyatt on the stage. The real one gets punched off the apron but pulls Reigns down for the DQ at 4:00.
Rating: D+. This was barely a match as a good chunk of it was spent on the fake Wyatt and waiting on Big Show to beat the count back in. Thankfully we didn’t have to sit through a long Reigns vs. Big Show match which would have killed the crowd and been a big bore all match long. Wyatt vs. Reigns should be a really fun power brawl when we get there though.
Bray hits a pair of Sister Abigails.
Titus O’Neil vs. Big E.
E. takes over to start and hammers Titus into the corner to start. That’s a very common way to open matches these days. We hit the early abdominal stretch complete with slaps but Titus tosses E. out to the floor. A belly to belly stops Titus’ comeback and the partners all try to interfere, earning them a mass ejection. Clash of the Titus ends E. at 2:49.
Austin WWE2K16 video.
Video on the Cadillac being crushed earlier this week. So what wrecked car was brought out earlier???
After a recap of what happened between them on Monday, here’s Orton to talk about what happened with Sheamus earlier this week. He keeps it simple by saying he’s going to attempt to make Sheamus entertaining by ripping off his mohawk, but here’s the Ascension of all people for some reason. There was a time when this might have been interesting but instead it’s RKO’s all around.
Video on Cesaro vs. Cena from Raw. This deserved any attention it could get.
Naomi/Tamina vs. Brie Bella/Alicia Fox
Brie shoves Naomi into the corner to start before it’s off to Tamina, who takes some kicks to the ribs as well. All hail the Bellas right? Tamina makes a comeback so it’s off to Alicia and Naomi with the latter still having no luck. Everything breaks down and a Nikki distraction lets Alicia hit the ax kick for the pin on Tamina at 2:55.
Ryback doesn’t like how Seth Rollins has been acting as champion, including how he ran away on Monday. Tonight, Ryback will show Rollins how a champion acts because there is no running and hiding.
Ryback vs. Seth Rollins
Non-title and both guys come out alone. Ryback shoves him out to the floor with ease to start and Rollins is already frustrated. Back in and some knees to the chest only earn Rollins a thirty second delayed vertical suplex. Seth kicks him off the apron though and nails a nice suicide dive, only to come back in using Brock’s jump to the apron. Man this guy has some guts.
Seth’s chinlock is quickly countered into a Backpack Stunner and the low superkick is countered into a powerbomb. It’s Rollins’ turn to counter though as he escapes Shell Shock and kicks Ryback in the head. Instead of covering though he walks out, but Ryback throws him onto the floor a few times. The threat of a Shell Shock on the floor is enough to make Seth run into the crowd for the countout at 8:11.
Rating: C-. I’ve seen worse. Ryback is really starting to find his groove as the upper midcard guy who can dabble in the main event when he needs to. He’s already a solid Intercontinental Champion and a good power guy so why not see how far out he can swim? This was more about the story and there’s nothing wrong with that.
Post match here’s Big Show to double team Ryback but Reigns makes the save to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. I’m getting really tired of these not terrible yet still totally skippable shows. This is another example of a show that you do not need to watch but won’t hate yourself if you sat through it. In other words, meh. That’s Smackdown in a nutshell: it exists and mostly doesn’t suck. That’s hardly a ringing endorsement but what else is there to say about it?
Results
Dean Ambrose b. Bo Dallas – Dirty Deeds
Rusev b. Fandango – Accolade
Roman Reigns b. Big Show via DQ when Bray Wyatt interfered
Titus O’Neil b. Big E. – Clash of the Titus
Alicia Fox/Brie Bella b. Naomi/Tamina – Ax kick to Tamina
Ryback b. Seth Rollins via countout
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Monday Night Raw – July 6, 2015: Well Of Course Brock Smash
Monday Night Raw Date: July 6, 2015
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield
The big story coming out of last week: product placement and lame action. The shows really aren’t lighting the world on fire right now, but a lot of that has to do with a lack of the Authority and Brock, because without the two of them, them show comes off as a glorified Smackdown. Get to the point already or get rid of the Authority as the main focus of the show because otherwise, a show without them on it isn’t going to go anywhere. Let’s get to it.
The opening recap covers last week’s product placement and Rollins reuniting the team.
We open with Heyman and Lesnar coming out to the exact reaction you would expect for them in a smark paradise like Chicago. Heyman talks about how the Authority thinks Brock is still in Tokyo, because they allowed him to show up tonight. Lesnar is a god and hallowed be his name, but he isn’t a god of love or charity or kindness. No, Lesnar is a god of violent retribution and the sword that will pierce Seth Rollins’ shield.
Heyman brings up the Streak but points out that it wasn’t because of any malice towards Undertaker. Heyman: “This one you’ll cheer.” When Brock took John Cena to Suplex City, it was just because Lesnar wanted the title and not out of disrespect. The same was true for Reigns at Wrestlemania, but it’s not the case for Seth Rollins.
No, Rollins has broken the 11th commandment by cashing in Money in the Bank, running away from a rematch and having his Authority buddies attack him two weeks ago. Heyman’s job is to sell us on Battleground in St. Louis, but the beatings and the suplexes begin tonight in Chicago. The Beast of Battleground is waiting for the champ tonight, so Rollins better be ready.
Kane is in Hawaii and we have badly photoshopped and unfunny photos to prove it.
The Stooges have taken a road trip and we’re going to get pictures later. That…..could work?
Big Show vs. Ryback
Non-title and Miz is at ringside in director’s chair with a microphone. In an inset interview, Ryback says he is one of the few who can manhandle Big Show and Big Show doesn’t like that. Well not many people would but Ryback never was very insightful. Miz starts shouting into the mic but only tells the big guys to hit each other.
The fans really don’t seem pleased with this one and Show chops Ryback in the corner. Miz: “ONE MORE TIME! ONE MORE TIME!” Ryback kicks him in the face a few times but Show knees Ryback into the corner. This is a very slow and lumbering match so far which isn’t a great choice for the opening match. Miz distracts Ryback so Show can slam him down as we take a break.
Back with Show holding a leg lock and Miz telling Show that he should never retire (WOO!). Ryback powers out and takes out the knee as well before dropping Show with three straight shoulders. The Meat Hook and a splash get two but the top rope version misses. Show hits a chokeslam and middle rope elbow, drawing in Miz for the double DQ (he was smart enough to hit them both at once) at 9:24.
Rating: D-. I have tried and tried to defend this three way feud but my goodness Big Show is dragging it down. Ryback is trying to become a more interesting character but there’s only so much you can do with Big Show as the power moves against him look cool, but once you’ve seen them a few times (over the last fifteen years or so) they lose a lot of their impact. Let him do comedy again or something, because Show as the big, strong monster is WAY past its expiration date.
Miz attacks both guys and then begs both guys to wait for Battleground. Ignore the large gap behind him where he could run at any time of course. Miz takes a Shell Shock and chokeslam and another Meat Hook drops Show again. At least the champ stood tall.
More Kane hysterics.
The Stooges went to Wrigley Field and weren’t impressed. They could at least take the price sticker off the window. That car better bite the dust before the end of the night.
Brie Bella vs. Paige
Paige gets backdropped to the apron to start and the announcers are already on the amount of days Nikki has held the title. So we’re just stuck with nothing interesting until we get to AJ because Nikki is interesting or something. Nikki: “BRIE MODE!” You can hear the crowd dying for this one, which could be because this story hasn’t changed in weeks now. Fox gets in a cheap shot but Brie knees down her sister/friend at the same time by mistake. Paige sidesteps the middle rope dropkick ala Samoa Joe but the other girls get involved, setting up the Bella Buster for the pin at 3:12.
Rating: D. This story needs to go somewhere already, and by somewhere I don’t mean having Naomi and Tamina come in to help Paige. This story has been set up for something major and the same Divas being rotated in one more time certainly isn’t it. The Bellas are long past interesting at this point and while Nikki is better than she was, this story needs a rest but we’re pretty much confirmed for the next few months because AJ MUST DIE or something.
Paige gets beaten up post match.
Recap of Wyatt vs. Reigns from last week.
Sheamus vs. Roman Reigns
Get your countouts ready now. Reigns shoves the briefcase out of Sheamus’ hands before we start and the brawl is on with a devastating headlock. Sheamus knees him in the ribs to take over but Reigns pulls him off the middle rope and knocks Sheamus outside. They’re still firmly in first power gear at this point.
Sheamus actually wins a slugout on the apron and sends Reigns face first into the post as we go to a break. That looked (and sounded) good at least. Back with Sheamus holding a chinlock and a nice loud CM PUNK chant keeping the crowd from being bored. Reigns’ best way around this is a bunch of clotheslines, followed by a BIG clothesline in the corner. Feel the intensity!
The Irish Curse is countered and a Samoan drop connects. The Superman Punch is countered into another Irish Curse for two but Reigns Superman Punches him out of the air….and here’s Bray. Roman charges up the ramp and Superman Punches….somebody, as Bray pops up on the screen and says anyone but you. Sheamus wins by countout at 11:20.
Rating: C. Decent enough power brawl here but like I said, it was no secret that we were going to get a countout or some kind of wonky finish. It wasn’t anything of note, but there’s only so much you can do with power brawls, especially when we just had one about forty minutes ago. WWE REALLY needs to work on alternating their styles because you keep getting the same styles of matches over and over and they get old fast.
Post match Randy Orton comes out for an RKO. I had been wondering where he was.
The WWE Network is in Italy. Uh….yay.
Rollins comes in to see HHH, who wants to know what Seth is going to do about Brock Lesnar. The champ thinks he has Battleground in the bag, but HHH is worried about tonight. Rollins needs to do the unthinkable tonight: have him laid out by the Authority like they did two weeks ago. To be fair, that is pretty unthinkable. Imagine the Stooges and Rollins being a real threat to Brock.
Here are Rusev and Summer Rae to keep this mess going. Rusev loves having a submissive Summer around but gets annoyed at the fans wanting Lana. He rambles on about being better than Dolph Ziggler until Summer tells the fans to give Rusev the respect he deserves. Rusev: “Thank you hot Summer.” Is she a radio chick now?
Cue Ziggler and Lana with the former saying Rusev achieved everything he has in WWE because of Lana. Dolph says Lana is his now and it’s time for kisses. The girls tease a fight but Rusev blasts Ziggler with the crutch before taking off the boot. This goes on for nearly five minutes with the only highlight being Summer attacking Lana. Ziggler’s comeback didn’t work and the beating just kept going.
This was WAY too long and my goodness Ziggler sucks in this role. After all the years of being with whatever girl can get him somewhere he’s all gaga over yet another good looking blonde because…..she likes him? Is there any other reason for these two to be together? Rusev needs to murder Ziggler and then do something bad to Lana and then never speak of this whole mess again.
Post break they actually do the big serious talk about Ziggler being attacked. Ziggler even did a stretcher job. This story SUCKS and there is no need to ever talk about it again. Figure out how your characters work and then don’t screw with them because going against established characters is one of the worst things you can do in wrestling or any other form of entertainment.
Bo Dallas vs. Dean Ambrose
Before the match, Dallas talks about how that was a bad thing happening to a bad person. Good things happen to people like him though, as long as you BOLIEVE! The dueling WE BOLIEVE/LET’S GO AMBROSE chants start up as Bo gets two off a clothesline before hitting the chinlock. Bo misses a knee drop and gets bulldogged down, setting up Dirty Deeds for the pin at 2:59. This was WWE saying “yeah Ambrose is still a thing after losing Thursday. Oh you didn’t know he lost Thursday? Well then never mind.”
The Stooges got stuck in traffic. Seriously.
R-Truth vs. King Barrett
No entrance for either guy as this feud just keeps going. Barrett stomps him down in the corner to start and a clothesline takes them out to the floor. Truth is sent into the post a few times and we hit the chinlock. A big boot gets two for Barrett and we take a break. Oh freaking joy we get to see more of this match. Barrett hammers away but runs into a series of clotheslines (WAY too popular tonight and in general). Winds of Change is countered into a crucifix for two but a low blow drops Truth. Truth goes up and dives into the Bull Hammer for the pin at 9:37.
Rating: D. So? Barrett has knocked Truth out a few times already, so what difference does it make if he does it again? Why should this horribly uninteresting feud that has made Barrett look even less important than he was when he was Intercontinental Champion? Barrett could be doing ANYTHING else and it would be better but we’re stuck with this. The match was boring too, just like everything else they’ve done.
Back from a break with another look at Ziggler being beaten down. This is treated as way too big of a deal after the mess they’ve made of this feud.
Here’s Rollins with an ax handle and the Stooges with their car and their own ax handles. Oh come on man. No one could possibly be that stupid. Rollins is going to burn Suplex City to the ground before going on about how awesome he is a bit longer. He finally asks if Lesnar is just Heyman’s….uh….I think you can figure this out, so here’s Brock. All three are ready for him so Brock thinks better of it and tells Heyman to bring him something. Heyman brings over an anvil case containing a pair of axes. Oh this is going to be good.
Brock smashes the ax into the car door and can’t even get it out, so he breaks a few windows and tears off a door. The door goes flying into the crowd (apparently hitting a fan, who was ok) and now it’s time for the Stooges to come save their car. Noble winds up with a broken arm and Mercury gets suplexed onto the hood, much to the delight of the crowd. Brock chases Rollins out of the ring and holds up the title to wrap things up.
THIS is what Brock should have been doing for the last six months. Just have him break stuff and be a freak of nature. Don’t have him get beaten down by Kane and the Stooges like EVERY OTHER FACE EVER. That was the problem with the HHH feud: anyone could have played Lesnar’s role. Here, there isn’t anyone else that Rollins hasn’t already beaten or has any real reason to be afraid of anymore so only Brock really fits.
Lucha Dragons vs. New Day
Woods is the odd man out here and the Players are on commentary, with a shirt for Cole. The Dragons speed things up to start but Kofi comes back with a kick to the ribs (devastating!) before it’s off to Big E. Titus goes on about some kind of fungus that Big E. has (maybe he could use a washcloth to clean it up. It didn’t make sense when they said it for weeks on end (and yes I know what it is) so why not say it again here?) before the Dragons clean house and dive on all three New Day guys as we take a break.
Back with Kofi getting two on Kalisto before it’s off to Big E. for more clubbing forearms. The abdominal stretch with the slaps set up a chinlock from Kofi as we hear about where everyone went to college. The hot tag brings in Cara and Titus takes over on commentary, doing a pretty awesome old school play by play, including a quick rant about how he should have JBL’s salary. Everything breaks down and the Midnight Hour ends Cara at 10:16.
Rating: C. This was fine and a nice way to set up the title match at Battleground. Neither of these teams are exactly lighting the world on fire at the moment but it’s nice to see something other than the team fighting over and over again. Titus continues to be WAY more charismatic than half the roster and deserves the success he’s having.
Steve Austin is on the cover of WWE2K16.
It’s Open Challenge time but first we get a package on Owens losing the NXT Title in Tokyo over the weekend. Cena says have no fear because the champ is here, meaning there will be a title match right here on Raw. Again Owens interrupts and says this is the worst part of the show every week because the people have to listen to Cena saying the same garbage over and over again. The bell is about to ring but here’s Cesaro one more time. Cesaro says he deserves another shot because he had Cena ready to tap out but Owens cost him the title shot. Owens walks away from the threat of violence and it’s time for a rematch.
US Title: Cesaro vs. John Cena
Cena is defending of course. A quick uppercut puts Cena down on the floor and we take a very early break. Stop doing that nonsense and just have the bell after the break. We got maybe 40 seconds of “action” and then miss three and a half minutes. I hate that way of thinking. Back with Cesaro stomping away as he almost has to play the heel here, even though he’s turned face for all intents and purposes.
A one arm delayed vertical suplex with a squat gets two but Cena shrugs it off (because it’s a suplex) and drops Cesaro with a front face electric chair drop. The AA is countered into a DDT for two and it’s off to the chinlock. That’s good for a second commercial in about five minutes of actual match time because they’re really trying to fill in time. Back with Cesaro catching Cena’s shoulder in a backbreaker and countering the Shuffle with a crossface.
That’s countered into an AA attempt but Cena has to settle for the STF instead. A rope is grabbed so Cesaro rolls some gutwrench suplexes for two of his own. That was a cool looking spot, as always. Cena blocks the Swing by doing a big situp into a DDT for two of his own and the fans are starting to buy into this. Cena rolls through a cross body into the AA but Cesaro lands on his feet.
Swiss Death is countered into a hurricanrana for two and both guys are down. The fans officially think this is awesome so they’ve won over one of the tougher crowd. Cesaro makes it even more awesome with a spinning springboard uppercut for an even closer two. They fall to the floor with Cena backdropping him into the timekeeper’s area but the referee takes his time counting. Well to be fair that’s not really a main event level finish so you can’t go there again.
Cena shoves Cesaro off the top for two off the Fameasser and then tells him to hold the ropes, which Cesaro does to counter another AA. A HUGE Swiss Death connects for two more but a quick AA gets the same. Both guys are spent so Cesaro is able to grab the Swing, setting up the Sharpshooter which he transitions into another crossface, but Cena slips out and puts on the STF.
Cesaro powers out of THAT and lifts Cena up into the air for a snap suplex. That is just scary, scary power. The Springboard Stunner misses so badly that Cesaro just Neutralizes Cena for two instead of going down. Cena’s tornado DDT is stopped in midair and Cesaro slaps him down into another crossface, sending Cena into the ropes for a chorus of boos.
The apron superplex (with EASE) gets two but Cena pops back up and floats over into a Batista Bomb (the sign of Cena being desperate) for a sloppy two, as called out by the announcers. Cena takes him to the corner but almost gets caught in a super Neutralizer, only to be countered into a super AA to retain the title at a mind blowing 30:10.
Rating: A-. Yo Vince, I think the guy can connect to the fans. Cesaro is basically where Dolph Ziggler was a few years ago: having really entertaining matches but never being able to show what else he can do because he’s never given the chance. Cesaro is one of the rare cases where he nails every single thing he’s asked to do and almost everyone is begging for him to move up to the next level, but something about a superhuman freak with a good look who can speak five languages fluently and has nearly fifteen years experience doesn’t click with Vince and for some reason the guy never gets the push he deserves.
At least there was this though, which is somehow better than last week’s near classic. Cena and Cesaro are guys with incredible chemistry and yet another example of someone going out there and having maybe the match of their lives against Cena. I’m hoping that when Cena retires, people look back at him in awe because this is a once in a generation kind of talent and we take him for granted.
Owens runs in and eats an AA to close the show.
Overall Rating: C. It took a lot to bail this show out but thankfully the main event is awesome and eats up well over half an hour to close things out. Other than that and the awesome BROCK SMASH segment, there really wasn’t much to see here. The wrestling in the first hour was horribly lame and the Rusev vs. Ziggler stuff has to end with Ziggler getting eaten like a Russian stew or the whole thing is an even bigger disaster than I was expecting. The main event leaves this on a very positive note, but there’s a lot for it to overcome here.
Results
Big Show vs. Ryback went to a double DQ when Miz interfered
Brie Bella b. Paige – Bella Buster
Sheamus b. Roman Reigns via countout
Dean Ambrose b. Bo Dallas – Dirty Deeds
John Cena b. Cesaro – Middle rope Attitude Adjustment
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Monday Night Raw Date: June 29, 2015
Location: Verizon Center, Washington, D.C.
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton
Battleground is on the horizon and the Authority seems to be reunited to help Seth Rollins defend his World Title against Brock Lesnar. This means Kane and Joey Mercury at the moment, as Lesnar injured Jamie Noble last week, meaning there aren’t many obstacles for Lesnar to overcome to get to Rollins. Let’s get to it.
The opening recap shows the ending of last week’s show with Lesnar being laid out by the devastating forces of Kane, Mercury and Rollins. I’m so glad they had Lesnar get beaten up as he was getting way too close to feeling like something special and they needed to cut his legs out from underneath him. Well, maybe just the toes or so as Lesnar is going to be fine.
Here’s the Authority, complete with the secret weapon of Noble, to open things up. This is officially Monday Night Rollins, because Rollins has been watching some old Nitro matches. Perhaps on the WWE Network for $9.99? He talks about the power in this city, which you attain by doing things no one else could do. Rollins did something that Cena and even the Undertaker couldn’t do, as he conquered the conqueror last week. Suplex City was burned to the ground and Lesnar is now on his way to Japan.
That’s what he deserves after what Lesnar did to Noble last week. We even get a quick Jamie Noble chant because these fans are that intelligent. They’re quickly tossed aside though as Rollins demands that the fans show Noble the respect that he deserves. However, it’s time for presents! Rollins has Apple Watches for everyone, likely fulfilling a product placement agreement. Kane is getting a bonus though. He debuted back in 1997 (that really shouldn’t be brought up) and a lot of things have changed since then.
Bill Clinton was in charge, the internet was dial-up and Paul Heyman was fat and disgusting…..so not everything has changed. In all that time, Kane hasn’t asked for a thing, so Rollins is sending him to…….Hawaii, complete with a picture saying Hawaii, thereby making this a complete copy of the segment where Rocky Maivia took over the Nation, giving the members watches and Faarooq a picture of Rocky himself.
As a hula dancer and ukelele player come out to complete the mood, Kane is looking forward to deciding which animal to throw into a volcano, but Rollins thinks they should team up to destroy Ambrose and Reigns in a No DQ tag match tonight. Rollins still isn’t done though as he has a 2015 Cadillac for the Stooges to travel in. The guys celebrate as Rollins lists off the price and features. I was right about that product placement it seems. This goes on until Big Show comes out for his match.
The tag match later is presented by the new Terminator movie. I’m sure some people will get annoyed by this but it’s money for the company in like 30 seconds. It’s not the worst thing in the world.
Big Show vs. Mark Henry
Oh….yay. Miz is on commentary to cheer for Henry but Show pounds Mark into the corner with right hands (which are the size of typewriters according to JR), only to have Henry knock him down and hit a splash for two. Not that it matters as two big right hands knock Henry silly for the pin at 1:24.
Ryback (sans belt) hits the ring to take Show down with a shoulder to the leg. Miz runs in to kick Ryback in the jaw, so Ryback wants their match to happen right now.
Miz vs. Ryback
Non-title., but now Ryback has the belt. I know it doesn’t mean as much today but it disappears? Miz tries to stomp him down but gets his head slammed into the mat for his efforts. Ryback whips him across the ring with authority (not THE Authority of course. Like they’d be involved with the Intercontinental Title), followed by a totally ridiculous FORTY SECOND delayed vertical suplex.
Miz bails to the floor but comes back with a short DDT for two, setting up a nice face pull. A chinlock goes nowhere but the Reality Check gets two more. That’s it for Ryback as he comes back with a spinebuster but the threat of a Meat Hook sends Miz running for the countout (the rare three count countout before the referee just says screw it and ends the match) at 5:11.
Rating: D. I would say this is what you would expect, but what you would actually expect is for Miz to beat him off a rollup when Big Show distracted Ryback. The triple threat match really isn’t doing anything for me, but at least there’s an actual feud over the title instead of just a one off match for a change.
Alicia Fox vs. Paige
Alicia comes out to the Bellas’ music and has them at ringside. Paige takes her down into an armbar to start and drives a knee into the face for two. Some kicks in the corner don’t bother Paige much as she hits a Thesz press, only to have the Bellas offer a distraction so Alicia can take over again as we go to a break. Back with Fox standing on the hair before we hit the chinlock.
As the fans start falling asleep due to the rest hold, the Bellas are right there with the COME ON (insert name here) shouting. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Paige and it’s back to the chinlock. Two chinlocks in a match this show tells me that Fox has no idea where to go on offense. Paige comes back with her three clotheslines and a kick to the face for two. Nikki tries a distraction so Fox can roll her up, only to have Paige roll through (with nothing on Fox’s arms, meaning there’s no reason she didn’t kick out) for the pin at 9:43.
Rating: D. The idea was fine here but it’s very clear that Fox had no business controlling most of a match this long. Paige vs. Nikki could be good, but I don’t buy for a second that Paige is going to win as Nikki just MUST get the Divas Title record so we never think of AJ Lee again. I mean, that would just change so many things right?
Here’s John Cena for the US Title Open Challenge (with the promo during the entrance instead of in the ring)…..and here’s Kevin Owens! I’ll ignore Cole calling this a budding rivalry because Cole is that big of a schnook when he stops thinking.
US Title: Kevin Owens vs. John Cena
Owens drops to the floor after the Big Match Intros and says he’ll just wait for Battleground. He’ll take the US Title there, but maybe this man can do it instead.
US Title: Cesaro vs. John Cena
Owens joins commentary, which should be entertaining stuff. Thankfully they’re immediately talking about the Balor vs. Owens NXT Title match this coming Saturday. Cena starts with a headlock and monkey flip to send Cesaro into the corner, meaning it’s time for a standoff. This time it’s Cesaro putting on a headlock before planting Cena with a powerslam, followed by a crucifix of all things for two.
The AA is countered and Cesaro drops Cena with a right hand for another near fall. As usual, why make things more complicated than they need to be? Off to an abdominal stretch on the mat as Owens talks about having what it takes to be a real champion. A dropkick staggers Cesaro but he casually slugs Cena down and gets two off a crossface punch to the head.
Back from a break with Cesaro trying a Sharpshooter of all things but Cena kicks him away, only to take a big clothesline for two. Cesaro loads up the Swing but opts for a catapult instead, only to have Cena bounce back into something similar to a springboard Stunner (it barely connected) for two of his own. Cesaro flips out of the AA and hits a massive Swiss Death for two more.
There’s the STF but Cesaro rolls out, adjusts his legs and turns the hold over into the Sharpshooter. That was Hart vs. Perfect-esque. Cena makes a rope though and Cesaro’s frustration is setting in. Owens: “Cena is in trouble. Not as much trouble as he’ll be in at Battleground but close enough.”
The apron superplex puts Cena down again as Cole thinks this is going to be a match of the year candidate. It kind of loses its appeal if you keep saying it over and over again, which is why a lot of Cole’s commentary gets old. And yes, I’m aware it’s mainly him being fed lines. Cena gets two more off a tornado DDT and they slug it out until Cesaro tries a high cross body, only to have Cena roll through into…..actually not the AA as he spins Cesaro forward into a faceplant for another near fall.
Owens gets up and swings at Cole for praising Cena, who is dropkicked off the top rope and out to the floor. Back in and Cena tries a sunset flip but has to settle for a sunset bomb for yet another two. There’s a Neutralizer out of nowhere but Cena kicks out again. A spinebuster sets up the Swing (good idea to have a power move set it up. It’s weird when he just grabs the legs) which sets up the Sharpshooter but Owens comes in for the DQ at 20:20.
Rating: B+. Can Cena have a bad match at the moment? The guy is on one heck of a roll, which says a lot given how good he normally is. Cesaro using the Sharpshooter is fine but debuting it against Cena isn’t the best idea as Cena hasn’t tapped out in about thirteen years. Very good match here, but did you really expect anything else?
Kevin powerbombs both guys and says if anyone is taking the title off Cena, it’s going to be him. Owens comes off as such a jerk on commentary and I love it very much.
Tonight, Dolph Ziggler and Lana are going public. Oh man this is going to be bad isn’t it?
We get what I think is the same recap that opened the show. That’s quite the use of another three minutes.
Bray Wyatt pops up on screen with the ANYONE BUT YOU picture of Reigns. He wants Reigns to open his eyes to see the truth and close his mouth so no more lies can be spread. Wyatt wasn’t his father’s favorite because his father threw him away like a piece of trash. I wonder if IRS wrote that off his taxes. Wyatt has his wings back now though and Reigns knows everything Bray stands for. There will be no distractions at Battlegrounds because the insects that watch them every week are inconsequential. They’re the yin to each others yang and Bray will be Roman’s crown of suffering. Anyone but you Roman. Run.
Lucha Dragons/Prime Time Players vs. New Day/Bo Dallas
JBL: “We lucha on Monday nights!” We get a clip of Rock’s big surprise appearance at a house show over the weekend where he laid out Dallas, which is a GREAT advertisement for the house show circuit. It’s the same thing as when they would occasionally have a title change and then turn it right back soon after. No it’s not going to happen all the time, but make the people think it could and you can sell some more tickets.
Woods and Kalisto get things going with the masked one flipping off the top rope into a wristdrag as JBL says the Dragons remind him of the APA days. Off to Cara vs. Dallas with Sin cranking on the arm, only to have Darren come in for his standing Earthquake splash for two. Titus comes in to throw Dallas around with ease, which is a really simple yet effective power move. Kalisto doesn’t have the same luck as Bo knees him in the head to finally take over.
Back to Young for a chinlock as the match slows down. The belly to back suplex onto the apron plants Dallas again and the threat of a huge brawl sends us to a break. We come back with Woods holding Kalisto in a cobra clutch (that’s a move that has gotten a lot more popular recently) but it’s quickly off to Cara to flip around and kick Big E. in the head.
E. isn’t in enough trouble to get caught in the Gut Check though as he shoves Young to the floor to take over. We get the rotating stomps before it’s back to Bo for the chinlock. That goes nowhere and the hot tag brings in Titus and everything breaks down. The Dragons hit big stereo dives, allowing Titus to hit a sitout spinebuster for the pin on Kofi at 14:35.
Rating: D+ Longer match than they needed to have here and I’m not wild on New Day losing again before their big rematch. That’s why you bring in someone like Dallas: to take the fall and keep the New Day looking as strong as possible, but since WWE never actually thinks these things through, this is what we get. At least the champions didn’t lose though.
Here are Dolph and Lana for their big moment. Originally they weren’t on the best of terms because Lana was just trying to get back at Rusev. Then things changed, Ziggler is a real man, and Lana cares for him. Rusev finally hobbles out with Summer Rae by his side. He never cared about Lana because kissing her was like kissing the ring post.
Ziggler cuts him off and calls Lana his girlfriend and violence is teased, but Summer grabs the mic and calls Lana a gold digger. She was with Rusev when he won the US Title, but as soon as that was gone, so was Lana. That’s enough for Lana and the fight is on, with the fans seemingly very pleased when Lana’s skirt comes up. The match could be a disaster but the moment wasn’t bad.
Ambrose talks to some Terminators when Reigns comes in and assures Dean that he’s ready. Dean is the only family Reigns has around here and they’re ready to rage.
Neville vs. Sheamus
Before the match we get a cool video of Neville being turned into a comic book superhero. I actually said he wrestled like a superhero when I saw him at a house show a few months back so they really nailed the idea here. Sheamus takes him down to the mat with a headlock as the announcers debate Neville beating him in the King of the Ring. JBL: “Nobody remembers who came second to Usain Bolt.” Cole: “We did.” JBL: “Well you’re nobody.”
Neville kicks him to the floor and Sheamus grabs the briefcase for comfort as we take a break. Back with Sheamus hitting the Regal Roll and a release suplex for no cover. Instead Sheamus just smiles like a bully is supposed to do. The fans think this is boring, so Sheamus puts his hand to his ear and slaps on a chinlock. Now THAT is a great heel move. No sarcasm there if it’s not clear.
Neville kicks him in the face for a breather but Sheamus calmly hits three straight Irish Curses to regain control. Sheamus gets low bridged to the floor though, setting up a great looking Asai moonsault. Back in and Sheamus gets kicked in the head again but is still able to kick the ropes for a huge crash to break up the Red Arrow. The Brogue Kick ends Neville at 12:41.
Rating: C. This was fine and again I like that they’re pushing Sheamus instead of having him go on the stupid, stupid losing streak that has become the trend for Money in the Bank winners. I’m hoping Neville can bounce back from this as it felt like a downgrade for him, but there’s a very good chance that it’s a one off loss and nothing else. The superhero video was a very nice touch and gives me hope.
Jack Swagger vs. King Barrett
Before the match, Barrett demands that all of his opponents must bow down to him. Swagger will have none of that so Barrett bails to the floor to start. Back in and Swagger throws him down with ease and gets the Patriot Lock with Barrett already in the ropes. Well he’s a hoss you see so you can’t expect that much intelligence. Jack runs into a knee in the corner and the Bull Hammer ends this at 1:47.
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose vs. Kane/Seth Rollins
No DQ. The Stooges come out in the Cadillac. It’s a brawl to start as it should be with Rollins quickly being knocked out to the floor. Kane gets double teamed but Rollins gets back in to shove Ambrose off the top rope. Back from an early break with Rollins holding Reigns in a chinlock and the partners on the apron, because WWE doesn’t get what NO DISQUALIFICATION means. Reigns fights away from Kane and it’s a double tag to bring in Ambrose and Rollins.
Dean quickly cleans house and knocks Rollins to the floor. It’s weapons time with a table getting things started. As if the fans didn’t love Dean enough already. The Stooges pull it away so Reigns comes back with a bunch of kendo stick shots to Mercury, followed by three straight Superman Punches to various evildoers. Speaking of evil, cue Bray Wyatt to take out Reigns, including a Rock Bottom onto the announcers’ table. Dean can’t fight them off alone though and it’s a chokeslam and Pedigree for the pin at 11:45.
Rating: C. Again, this was totally fine and they covered all the bases they needed to cover here. Wyatt costing Reigns the match makes perfect sense and at least the pin on Ambrose took two people. It’s a pretty standard main event tag, but I’m glad they made it no DQ to avoid the same tired ending we always get.
Post match Reigns saves Dean from a TripleBomb through the table but Kane chokeslams him down too. Reigns fights back again but is finally thrown through the table in the corner. Another Pedigree puts Reigns down, leaving Wyatt to come back in (where was he for the last eight minutes?) and hit Sister Abigail to end the show.
Overall Rating: C+. Well it took me three days and…..eh. I’m not at all surprised as it wasn’t the best looking show in the world but at least it had the awesome Cena vs. Cesaro match (I’m as shocked as you are) and a few other good things in there as well. The Ziggler/Lana segment started off looking bad but Lana getting physical was long overdue. The show wasn’t too bad and had more than enough moments to make it work. Good enough stuff here, but the car actually survived. That’s quite the shock.
Results
Big Show b. Mark Henry – KO Punch
Ryback b. Miz via countout
Paige b. Alicia Fox – Rollup
Cesaro b. John Cena via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered
Prime Time Players/Lucha Dragons b. New Day/Bo Dallas – Sitout spinebuster to Kingston
Sheamus b. Neville – Brogue Kick
King Barrett b. Jack Swagger – Bull Hammer
Kane/Seth Rollins b. Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns – Pedigree to Ambrose
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Smackdown Date: June 11, 2015
Location: CajunDome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Jerry Lawler
It’s the last show before we get to Money in the Bank, meaning it’s the last time we have to cram an entire pay per view build into two weeks for a very long time. The big story coming out of Monday is Ambrose using Instagram (just go with it) to warn Rollins that he was coming, only to lay Seth out again to end the show. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here’s Ambrose, wearing a ton of Mardi Gras beads, coming through the crowd to open things up. He holds up the title and says let the good times roll because he’s been having a good time on Bourbon Street. Ambrose takes us through the Instagram pictures from Monday, thankfully pointing out that the ticket wasn’t real and that Reigns just saved him a seat. After a clip of the main event from Raw, Ambrose promises to drop Seth on his head with Dirty Deeds and take the World Title for real this Sunday.
Cue Rollins who says Ambrose is just like all the other scum in this arena: not in his league. Rollins wants the title back and Dean drops it right in the middle of the ring. The champ picks it up but realizes it’s just a replica because the title is somewhere between here and New Orleans. Dean: “It’s been a blurry few days. It still feels like Tuesday to me.” Kane comes out and brings up Mercury and Noble beating Rollins on Monday when he was all alone. Tonight he gets to be alone all over again against Dolph Ziggler. As usual, Ambrose and Rollins have a great promo when people just leave them alone.
Ryback vs. Miz
Non-title. Miz bails to the floor to take off the sunglasses and has his sunset flip attempt countered by having his head slammed into the mat. A ridiculous 26 seconds vertical suplex sends Miz outside again but he throws Ryback over the announcers’ table as we take a break. Back with Ryback fighting out of a chinlock and hitting a backpack Stunner. A powerslam gets two for the champ but Miz kicks him in the head to set up the Figure Four.
That goes nowhere (just like always because it’s a horrible move for Miz to use) as Ryback powers out, only to take a short DDT for two more. The threat of a Meat Hook sends Miz to the floor but Ryback runs him down out there just as easily. Back in and Shell Shock is countered into the Skull Crushing Finale for two and Miz is stunned. Ever the genius, Miz tries a Meat Hook of his own but takes the real thing, setting up Shell Shock to give the champion the pin at 7:44.
Rating: C. This was fine for what it was and served the purpose of giving Ryback a nice win. Miz is settling into this midcard role as he loses his matches but is able to talk himself right back into being hated all over again due to pure delusion. Ryback vs. Big Show isn’t going to be anything great but at least the Shell Shock at the end will be good. Assuming of course WWE doesn’t feel the need to feed someone else to Big Show for reasons I’ll never fathom.
Post match here’s Big Show who says he doesn’t impress easily with over twenty years of experience (not quite as he debuted in October 1995). The Shell Shock was fine on Monday but this Sunday ends with one of these right hands. He’s holding up his left hand but close enough. Ryback says he’ll have the fans in his corner on Sunday so bring it right now, little man. As expected, Show turns him down.
Tough Enough finalists, including former OVW TV Champion Michael Hayes (not that Michael Hayes. This one only has one leg).
Jack Swagger vs. King Barrett
R-Truth is on commentary before his pre-show match with Barrett on Sunday and has decided that he should be King after beating Barrett recently. He also thinks he’s in the ladder match on Sunday. Barrett stomps Jack down in the corner to start as Truth puts on the robe. The distraction breaks up the Bullhammer and Jack nails a big clothesline on the floor followed by a Vader Bomb for two. The Patriot Lock is broken up and the Bullhammer gives Barrett the pin at 2:23.
Truth has disappeared.
More Tough Enough finalists.
We recap the Bellas’ Twin Magic from a few weeks back and Paige being sick of the whole thing.
Alicia Fox yells at Paige and there’s going to be a match later. I really wish WWE would mix up this kind of thing. We’re long past the suspension of disbelief that a package on the Divas would air then there just happened to be a camera on Paige when Fox came up to challenge her. All you need is to say this happened earlier in the day.
This week’s sitdown interview is with Lana, who says she and Dolph read books together and talk about things. Rusev comes in again and says don’t ruin this. Ziggler has been with a bunch of other women but Rusev has only been with her. Lana says it’s over and leaves so Rusev scares Cole away.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Seth Rollins
Non-title and Seth is on his own. The champ takes it to the mat with a headlock but Ziggler counters into an armbar to send Seth to the ropes. Back to the headlock on Dolph for a bit before the threat of a superkick sends Rollins out to the floor. They’re still in first gear here as Rollins takes a breather. Back in and Dolph hammers away in the corner, only to get caught in an electric chair for two. The standard chinlock kills some time as the fans want Lana. Speak for yourselves. I don’t want her and Ziggler anywhere near each other.
Dolph fights up and a Cactus Clothesline puts both guys outside, where Rollins catapults him over the barricade as we take a break. We come back with Ziggler slugging away until Rollins drops him with a Sling Blade for two. Well at least it wasn’t another chinlock. Ziggler comes back with a backdrop to put Rollins on the floor, followed by the running DDT for two. The Buckle Bomb is countered into a rollup for two and the Fameasser gets the same. Dolph keeps speeding things up and goes to the top for a high cross body but Rollins rolls through and grabs the trunks for the pin at 13:53.
Rating: B-. Nice main event style match here with Rollins getting the kind of a win he should be getting. Ziggler doesn’t lose anything either and everyone comes out looking fine. It’s very nice to see them breaking from the same pattern that they’ve been having for months for Rollins as it was getting repetitive.
Remember the two times we’ve seen Tough Enough finalists already? Make it three.
Paige vs. Alicia Fox
Paige takes her down to start and cranks on a reverse chinlock for a bit before Fox takes her down and puts on a chinlock. They aren’t exactly dishing out the creativity. At least Fox adds in some knees to the head to mix things up. A big boot to the face gets two on Paige but she snaps Fox’s throat across the ropes. This is her house, which makes me wonder how much a Diva makes since Paige must have 40 houses around the country. The PTO makes Fox tap at 4:46.
Rating: D. They did a good enough job of making Paige look good going into Sunday but I don’t buy her as having a chance at taking the title because All Hail the Bellas. It didn’t help that the match was nearly half chinlock. You really shouldn’t need two of those in a match that doesn’t last five minutes.
Long recap of Owens vs. Cena to set up the rematch on Sunday. The first match was great and I really hope Owens just walks out on the second because he has nothing to gain.
The Prime Time Players say they’re like butter because they’re on a roll. Whole wheat and gluten free that is. They incorporate the clap into the Millions of Dollars dance and even Renee joins in.
Final batch of Tough Enough finalists, including the Big O.
Roman Reigns/Randy Orton/Neville vs. Sheamus/Kane/Kofi Kingston
Those are quite the interesting teams. Reigns decks Kofi to start before Neville comes in and eats a right hand to the face. Neville flips over Sheamus and tags in Orton, because we haven’t seen Orton vs. Sheamus enough lately. The good guy keeps control for a bit until a Kane distraction lets Sheamus nail a tilt-a-whirl powerslam to take over. Back from a break with Orton fighting out of Sheamus’ chinlock.
The lukewarm tag brings in Neville to clean house with his variety of kicks but Kane breaks up the Red Arrow. Kane comes back in for some weak stomping and a big side slam for two as this isn’t exactly inspiring stuff so far. Kofi comes back in to fire the New Day up again with Woods declaring him the greatest of all time. A dropkick gets two and Woods says he’s getting annihilated right now. Sheamus gets two of his own off the Irish Curse and it’s off to the chinlock.
Neville avoids a charge into the post though and it’s a hot tag to Reigns, who runs Kofi over in a hurry. The New Day is easily dispatched but Kane counters a Superman Punch with a chokeslam, which earns Kane an RKO, followed by a Brogue Kick, followed by a dropkick from Neville, followed by Trouble in Paradise. Reigns is back up though and the Superman Punch connects to Kofi, only to have the New Day come in for the DQ at 13:25.
Rating: C-. This was boring. That’s the best word I can come up with for it. We were sitting around and waiting on the big parade of finishers to close things out and it eventually came and went. It’s not a terrible match or even bad but I never came close to being interested in what was going on.
Reigns takes a Midnight Hour and it’s ladder time. Cue Dolph with a ladder of his own but Neville climbs the ladder and dives onto everyone who was nice enough to brawl right beneath him. Neville pulls down the briefcase to end the show.
Overall Rating: C. Totally average show here as they talked up the pay per view a bit but didn’t do much to make me care about what I was seeing. Money in the Bank is a show that sells itself with the big ladder match and it gets very difficult to build towards it as the singles matches and tags don’t change anything. As for the rest, it was just a standard Smackdown: watchable wrestling, nothing important, two hours gone.
Results
Ryback b. Miz – Shell Shock
King Barrett b. Jack Swagger – Bullhammer
Seth Rollins b. Dolph Ziggler – Rollins rolled through a cross body and held Ziggler’s trunks
Paige b. Alicia Fox – PTO
Roman Reigns/Randy Orton/Neville b. Sheamus/Kane/Kofi Kingston via DQ when New Day interfered
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume III at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Or newcomers class.We talk about the 2002 rookie class as the best ever in WWE and with good reason. You had:
John Cena
Randy Orton
Brock Lesnar
Batista
Rey Mysterio
If there has ever been a better group of talent coming into the company in one year, I’ve never heard of it.
However, there’s another group that beats anyone out for second place that doesn’t get as much attention. From February 14, 1999 to January 31, 2000, the following debuted:
Chris Benoit
Eddie Guerrero
Big Show
Chris Jericho
Kurt Angle
That’s not a bad group for second, and the fact that four of them left WCW to come over makes them even more valuable. Not as valuable as 2002’s group of course, but it’s not too shabby.