Smackdown – October 24, 2014: In Search Of A Gas Station

Smackdown
Date: October 24, 2014
Location: Intrust Bank Arena, Wichita, Kansas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before Hell in a Cell and things are all set. The main story coming out of Raw is Seth Rollins finally attacking Randy Orton, his partner on Monday, by Curb Stomping him to end the show. This is likely going to help set up Orton’s face turn and then Orton vs. Rollins, which could be some very interesting stuff down the line. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Ambrose to open things up. Ambrose talks about defying the laws of physics because he keeps getting back up no matter what the Authority does to him. Yeah it hurts to get knocked down so many times, but the difference between someone like he and Mick Foley is that Foley is a nice guy. Dean doesn’t have anything to live for beside hurting the people that hurt him. He’s been waiting for this day since Rollins stabbed him in the back for business so if Rollins has any final words, come out here and say them now.

Rollins pops up on screen and says Dean can’t call him out. Seth is the one that does the calling out and he’ll be doing that later tonight. It was always Dean believing that something special was coming from the Shield but Seth was just using it to get ready for his big moment. On Sunday, Dean Ambrose goes away and Rollins can cash in his contract to become World Champion. Dean wraps it up by saying they’ll burn together on Sunday, but Seth will burn alone.

Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Los Matadores

Sheamus is on commentary. Damien hammers on Diego to start and it’s quickly off to Miz who gets chopped in the corner. Miz comes right back with ten forearms to the chest to annoy Sheamus but the champ is just bored. It’s back to Damien, but Fernando kicks him in the face to take over and make the tag to Diego. They head outside for a Figure Four on Diego as Miz puts one on Fernando for the submission at 2:56.

Bo Dallas interrupts the Dusts’ odd chat of the week. They’re in a six man later and Bo thinks they just need to Bolieve. Goldust: “What a weirdo.”

AJ Lee vs. Alicia Fox

Still non-title despite Fox pinning AJ on Monday. Fox takes her down to start but gets caught in a guillotine choke. Paige, in Fox’s corner, shouts instructions to get out of the hold and Fox takes over for the first time. Lee fights out of a chinlock but gets slammed down with ease. Paige gets on the apron but AJ slams them together, setting up a rollup for the pin at 2:04. So AJ now needs heel miscommunication to beat Alicia Fox?

Remember that Wyatt Family video where the Family is free but Bray is never free? Well it’s airing again here.

We get a sitdown interview from earlier in the week with Big Show to talk about what happened with the soldier on Monday. Show asked for the interview and we see a clip from the incident to get things going. Big Show talks about how personal some of the things Rusev say can get but Rusev attacked the soldier when the incident was over. He has a lot of friends who are Russians (seriously) and he’s had to apologize to them more than once.

Show has been lucky enough to go around the world and meet some wealthy people, but those aren’t his heroes. He gets to meet his heroes when he goes around the world and meets the servicemen and women who defend this country. A few years back he met a two star general who broke down when meeting Big Show because it was such a big deal.

Now we get a clip of Big Show’s “idol” (to be fair Show laughs this off) Hulk Hogan saying no one is more American than the Big Show. On Sunday, Show is going to feel the power of America and it’s going to carry him to victory. We close out the interview where Show says he can’t keep his emotions under control but he’ll knock Rusev out for a pin on Sunday. This was longer than it needed to be and I see no reason for it not to take place in the arena.

Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Cesaro

Cesaro is challenging after pinning Dolph on Monday. Why the Divas didn’t do the same isn’t quite clear. They hit the mat to start with Ziggler actually in control but getting nailed in the ribs. Dolph flips out of a monkey flip attempt and gets two off a rollup. A nice pinfall reversal sequence ends with Ziggler nailing a dropkick for two but Cesaro sends him shoulder first into the post.

Back from a break with Cesaro putting on a sleeper but having to break up Ziggler’s sleeper a few seconds later. Dolph’s hurricanrana is countered so he comes back with a sunset flip for two instead. The running DDT is countered into a spin out slam for two as Cesaro is getting frustrated. A big boot and powerbomb get two more but the Swing is countered into a small package for two. Cesaro loads up an uppercut but gets Zig Zagged to retain the title at 11:25.

Rating: C+. Nice match but was there a need to have Dolph lose via pin on Monday? Couldn’t you accomplish the same thing by having them both get counted out or something like that, setting up a big match on Sunday? Heaven forbid of course because we need to give Cesaro another win over a champion to make him strong, even though you could do the same by having him Neutralize Ziggler on the floor and win by countout. That might be too much creativity though so it’s clear why it didn’t happen.

Nikki Bella/Cameron/Summer Rae vs. Brie Bella/Naomi/Natalya

Only Brie gets an entrance because we need BRIE MODE. Brie and Cameron get things going and Cameron actually manages to not botch anything in the first ten seconds. She elbows Brie down and starts a YES chant before it’s off to Summer for a clothesline. We get a totally genuine Brie chant as she kicks Summer down but Cameron takes Naomi off the apron. Nikki comes in for the Rack and the pin on Brie at 2:02. Well that happened.

Post match Nikki says for thirty days, she’ll be the evil sister and Brie can be the Cinderbella. This is what I sit through for you people. Remember that.

Hell in a Cell by the numbers.

Video on Orton vs. Cena.

Hogan picks Cena to win on Sunday.

Usos/Mark Henry vs. Goldust/Stardust/Bo Dallas

Dallas runs from Henry to start so it’s Stardust and Jey starting instead. A headbutt has Stardust in trouble so it’s off to Jimmy vs. Goldust. The Usos clothesline Goldust out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Stardust clotheslining Jimmy before it’s off to Goldist for some choking. We hit the chinlock for a bit but Jimmy fights up for an enziguri. The hot tag brings in Henry for clotheslines as everything breaks down. Jey dives onto Goldust and it’s Dallas alone with Mark. Henry throws him into the corner but has to World’s Strongest Slam Stardust, allowing Bo to hook the Bodog for the pin on Henry at 8:00.

Rating: D+. This was every six man tag with two different people to supplement the standard tag match that we’ve seen a half dozen times now. I don’t know what there is to gain by having Dallas pin Henry again as you would think we got the idea when he beat him twice in a row, but that might require a fresh thought from creative.

Ziggler is in the back bragging about his wins when Cesaro comes in and says Dolph got lucky. Cesaro calls the title the most prestigious in the company and asks for a 2/3 falls match for the title on Sunday.

Here are Rollins and the Stooges to the ring where there are some tables covered with weapons. Rollins says he bought in for the millionth time and says it’s foreign to everyone here in Kansas. There are no rules on Sunday so let’s have a preview of what Ambrose is in store for on Sunday. Seth starts with the handcuffs because Dean has surprised him from different places. Now he can have Ambrose in one place.

Next up is a screwdriver to prove that Dean has been a screwup all along. Seth picks up a lead pipe to prove that Dean is indeed destructable before moving on to a chair which stared the whole thing. We get to the point now as Rollins calls Dean out because this is his chance to have things one on one.

There’s no Ambrose though so maybe he’s smarter than Seth thought he was. We see a clip from the end of Raw as Ambrose sneaks up behind Seth and nails him with a kendo stick shot. The Stooges come in but Dean fights them off and tries a powerbomb through a table. The Stooges finally do their job and take Dirty Deeds before being elbowed through the tables to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was about everything other than the Orton vs. Cena match which makes me think that it’s getting the main event slot, despite it having no need to do so. The problem with Ambrose vs. Rollins is they have to go insane with the violence to justify everything they’ve talked about and I don’t think that’s going to be allowed. The show should be entertaining but I don’t know if they’ll be able to take it far enough or be able to resist going with Orton vs. Cena as the main event. Nice build show this week but it’s clear that these stories are almost out of gas.

Results

Miz/Damien Mizdow b. Los Matadores – Figure Four to Fernando

AJ Lee b. Alicia Fox – Rollup

Dolph Ziggler b. Cesaro – Zig Zag

Nikki Bella/Summer Rae/Cameron b. Brie Bella/Naomi/Natalya – Rack to Brie

Goldust/Stardust/Bo Dallas b. Usos/Mark Henry – Bodog to Henry




Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: October 13, 2014

Coming off of last week, I really wasn’t looking forward to this week’s show. Things have been so boring in WWE lately and they almost have to turn around for the sake of my sanity. On the other hand, the theme this week seemed to be reality TV with Todd Chrisley of Chrisley Knows Best and some Real Housewife on the show. I’m sure this is going to go well. Let’s get to it.

We open with the now usual Ambrose and Cena showdown. This time it was Ambrose starting things off and wanting to deal with Cena so he could get to the showdown with Rollins. Cena came down and told Dean to shut up before he ran his mouth off and blew the biggest match of his life. Authority, tag match, it’s next.

The tag match was actually a three way this time with the unlikely duo fighting the Usos and the Dusts. This was a nice, long fifteen minute match that took its sweet time to get going but finally found its groove. The idea was the Authority kept waiting for the makeshift team to implode but Cena wound up AAing Goldust for the pin. This was the first in a long series of matches that got time and surprised me by how good it was. Cena and Ambrose vs. the Usos on their own for about seventeen minutes sounds good.

The Authority came out post match and made the Cena vs. Ambrose contract on a pole match for later tonight. I like this better, though I would have put it next week instead of next week. There’s no need to waste the fifteen minutes of PPV time to set the match up when you can do it here just fine. It also makes it easier to build a PPV when you have established main events.

Layla walked out on AJ Lee in a tag match but AJ pinned Alicia (partner of Paige) with a Shining Wizard. This was more of the same stuff we’ve seen for months from them.

Orton was granted his request of facing the loser of the contract match. They never said loser and called it “the other guy” but it’s a nice way making it sound better.

Orton beat Ziggler in another long match with a really good ending of Orton throwing Ziggler out of a powerbomb and into an RKO. That being said, there were other people that could have jobbed for Orton instead of Ziggler. I mean, it’s not like Kofi is doing anything is he? No it just had to be the Intercontinental Champion right? This is where WWE misusing its huge roster gets on my nerves.

Rollins came in after the match and gave Ziggler a Curb Stomp. The idea was that Rollins was trying to one up Orton, which carried into the next match where Rollins beat Jack Swagger in an easier match. Orton gave Jack an RKO for good measure. You can see Orton is about to turn face and it’s working really well.

Rusev and Big Show had their big showdown but Mark Henry ran in and caused a DQ. This is pretty clearly setting up another match at the PPV where Rusev gets his big win clean. Show knocked Rusev out cold after the match because he’s a sore loser.

The Chrisley Knows Best family was in the front row and their appearance was little more than a plug for the show. I have no interest in watching it but Chrisley came off as a nice guy who wanted to raise his kids well. I can’t make jokes about that.

Sheamus beat up Miz but lost by countout. See, now why couldn’t Orton have done that to Ziggler? Losing by countout is fine as Sheamus got carried away and distracted rather than getting pinned, even by a fluke.

The Total Divas met up with the housewife chick and Cameron had a stuck up chick off with her. Six Divas tag, you know the drill. Standard guest star appearance.

The new Wyatt video showed him alone and talking about Abigail as he kept saying it’s coming. Creepy stuff indeed but it worked.

Ambrose won the contract when Cena had to fight off the Authority in a dull match. This was what I expected it to be and didn’t really go anywhere new. Ambrose had to win it though.

Raw was FAR better this week as they cut out the stupid stuff and had a wrestling show. I know you can’t do this every week, but it’s nice to see something fresh for a change. When WWE cuts out all the goofiness and just lets the stories tell themselves, they make things way easier to sit through. It’s a good show this week and exactly what was needed after last week’s mess.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Night Raw – October 13, 2014: Remember Last Week? Well Forget All Of That.

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 13, 2014
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

We had cancer week last week, so this time it’s REALITY WEEK! Tonight there are two reality stars appearing on the show with Nene Leakes of the Real Housewives of Atlanta and Todd Chrisley of Chrisley Knows Best. Why I’m supposed to care about either of these people is beyond me, but you and I both know they can’t top HODA’S CRAZY DANCE! Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Authority making Ambrose vs. Cena for the right to face Rollins inside the Cell.

Here’s Ambrose to get things going. Dean says there’s nothing he’d like more than being locked inside the Cell with Seth Rollins. To be locked inside there with all that metal and steel so he can hurt Seth Rollins so bad that he wishes he never met Ambrose. But first there’s a certain fifteen time WWE Champion to deal with and here’s Cena to respond.

Cena says Ambrose needs to relax because the match is made and it’s in two weeks in Dallas. The people want to see it though because they know both guys have a chance to get their hands on Rollins. Cena offers a little advice: shut up until the pay per view and use the two weeks to get ready for the biggest match of his career when Cena breaks him.

Dean says thanks bit brother but he was born ready. Ambrose wants to drop Cena right now but John tells him to drop it because Ambrose is in way over his head. Dean drops the mic and cracks his knuckles but here’s the Authority. Short version: the match is on the Network in two weeks, it costs $9.99, they’re in a tag match against the Usos and the Dusts. The Authority even make a bet on if they’ll fight each other or not.

Goldust/Stardust vs. Usos vs. Dean Ambrose/John Cena

Dean and Jimmy get things going with Ambrose cranking on the arm. Off to Cena to stay on the armbar as the fans aren’t pleased with John. Jimmy slips over and tags in his brother who eats a clothesline for two. Cena and Ambrose keep working well together and don’t seem to have many issues with each other.

Jey slips out of the AA and grabs a top wristlock, only to get dropkicked back down. The slow arm work continues as the fans want Stardust. Ambrose finally gets in off the tag and hammers on Jimmy with right hands and the ReBound Clothesline to send him outside. Stardust gets in a shot of his own and we take a break.

Back with Stardust raking Jimmy’s back and tagging off to his corner for a double stomp in the corner. Stardust quickly comes back in and cranks on Jimmy’s arms. Jimmy finally sends the Dusts into each other but Goldust pulls Jey off the apron just in time. Ambrose goes after Goldust but Jey is able to tag in Cena.

John cleans house but Stardust flips out of the AA. Goldust comes in with a powerslam but Goldust eats a superkick. The double dive takes out the Dusts and Cena dives on all four of them. Ambrose won’t be left out and dives on all five for an even bigger crash. He throws Cena and Goldust inside where the makeshift team hits stereo finishers for the pin at 14:50.

Rating: C+. As usual with long tag matches like this, the match got way better after the break but the first part wasn’t any good. It was a bunch of boring arm work until we got to the second half where things sped up. Cena and Ambrose diving were nice visuals as it’s not something they bust out all that often. Good match but the first half is hard to sit through.

Post match the Authority comes out so HHH can pay off the bet ($1) to Stephanie. HHH thinks Ambrose and Cena really want to get at each other, so why not just do the contract match tonight? Cena and Ambrose stare each other down and the match is official.

We look at Big Show knocking Rusev out last month.

AJ Lee/Layla vs. Paige/Alicia Fox

AJ says she doesn’t like any of the Divas but she dislikes Layla the least. They can get along for one night at least. Alicia nails AJ with a quick tilt-a-whirl backbreaker before it’s off to Paige for some skipping. AJ chases her around but it’s quickly off to Alicia to miss a boot in the corner. Layla walks out on a tag attempt so AJ hits a quick Shining Wizard to pin Alicia at 1:51.

Layla gets beaten up for good measure.

We see Big Show ripping down the Russian flag.

Orton comes in to see the Authority and says he wants the loser of Ambrose and Cena. The bosses approve.

Rowan is free video.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Randy Orton

Non-title and Cesaro is on commentary. Ziggler knocks him out to the floor to start and sends Orton face first into the steps. Back in and Orton gets two off a slam but walks into a dropkick. Orton knocks him back to the apron but gets pulled outside and sent into the barricade. They head back in again but Orton takes too long to gloat and gets dropkicked off the apron. Rollins comes out to the ramp with the briefcase for some reason and we take a break.

Back with Ziggler in a headlock and actually not fighting out immediately. A catapult sends Ziggler into the buckle for two and Orton puts him on the top rope for some headbutts. Dolph fights out of a superplex attempt but gets crotched before he can follow up. Now the superplex connects for two but Orton can barely follow up. Dolph makes his comeback with right hands and a running neckbreaker followed by an elbow drop for two.

Randy blocks a superkick and gets another two count off the snap powerslam. Ziggler counters the RKO (which was set up to a face pop), can’t hit the Fameasser and counters another RKO into the superkick for two. The Zig Zag is countered so Dolph tries the Fameasser, only to get countered into a powerbomb position. Orton throws him into the air and pulls him down into the RKO for the pin at 19:25. Rollins never was a factor.

Rating: B. That ending was awesome as Orton keeps coming up with creative ways to hit the RKO. It really seems like they’re setting up a face turn for him as he spent half the match playing to the crowd and may have been trying to outshine Rollins. It’s good stuff and I’ve always found Orton more interesting as a face than a heel. On the other hand, that’s Ziggler’s second clean loss in four days.

Post match Rollins gives Ziggler a Curb Stomp, likely setting up Ziggler’s third straight loss on Smackdown.

Seth Rollins vs. Jack Swagger

Rollins flips over Swagger’s shoulder to start and we’re already at a standoff. He misses a clothesline though and bails to the floor as we’ve barely had any contact yet. Swagger goes after Seth and gets his neck snapped across the top rope to finally get things going. Seth starts working on the arm and cranks on it a bit until Jack fights up with a clothesline. They head outside for another clothesline to Rollins but he gets in a shot of his own. Orton comes out to watch as Seth goes inside for a suicide dive to drop Swagger.

Back from a break with Rollins hitting a great looking enziguri for two and dropping some knees to the ribs. A kick to the back has Swagger in trouble but Rollins stops to yell at Orton. Seth cranks on the arm again but gets caught in a wheelbarrow suplex out of the corner for two. Swagger gets two more off the Vader Bomb before catching Rollins in the powerslam for another two count.

Jack takes out the knee and puts on the Patriot Lock, only to get rolled into the corner. Another Patriot Lock attempt is countered and the low superkick puts Jack down. The Curb Stomp is countered into another Patriot Lock but Seth makes the ropes. Seth is sent into the post but he counters a suplex into a rollup with a handful of tights for the pin at 15:05.

Rating: C+. Not a great match here but there’s only so much they can do with this concept. Rollins looked good and that’s all he was supposed to do so the match worked well enough. Swagger is the same guy he was before, which gets annoying at times but at least he has a fresh battery to absorb so many of his losses.

Orton RKOs Swagger post match and gets in Rollins face. They talk trash but no violence comes.

Ambrose says don’t expect him to be a nice guy tonight because that’s not his style. He’s bringing it to Cena and going off to get Rollins.

Big Show talks about how he’s going to fight for America tonight and how the weight of America is on his shoulders. That’s fine, because he has the biggest shoulders around.

Rusev vs. Big Show

Before the match Lana rips on America for celebrating Columbus Day and gets cheap heat off the Atlanta Braves. Rusev promises to crush Big Show and we’re ready to go. Show kicks him in the face to start and the USA chants begin. They head outside with Rusev being whipped into the barricade as it’s one sided so far. Some chops send Rusev back to the floor and Show steps on his head.

More chops (complete with the Braves’ Tomhawk Chop) start a USA chant until Rusev busts out a dropkick to stop Big Show cold. He nailed him right in the jaw too. Rusev stomps on the back and clotheslines Big Show out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Big Show slowly fighting out of a side choke but missing a middle rope elbow. Rusev puts on another choke but gets dropped by a slam. The KO Punch misses and Rusev kicks him in the ribs. The Accolade goes on and here’s Mark Henry. Mark gets knocked off the apron to break the hold but Rusev puts it right back on, drawing in Henry for the DQ at 14:09.

Rating: D+. This was slightly better than I was expecting and a minor miracle given how long it went. Big Show getting upset over this is going to be dull and it’s going to lead to Show vs. Henry yet again. Rusev hopefully gets to move on to someone other than a super heavyweight for awhile because there’s only so much more he can do against them.

Show seems to forgive Henry for what he did as the Russian flag comes down. Henry and Show surround the Russians so Rusev comes out swinging against Henry, only to get dropped by the KO Punch.

Sheamus hasn’t been feeling good since last week. The solution: two Brogue Kicks.

Ad for Chrisley Knows Best. The family is in the front row tonight and say how awesome it is to be here. They hype the new season and that’s about it. Simple and inoffensive plug for a show and nowhere near as bad as I was expecting.

Sheamus vs. The Miz

Non-title. Miz’s entrance now has the lights go out for a much better effect. Miz runs to start but decks Sheamus as they get back inside. Sheamus easily fights back and throws Miz onto Mizdow, who mimics everything Miz does, even throwing punches (albeit with the wrong arm). Miz cranks on a chinlock as the fans want Mizdow.

The pale one makes a comeback and hammers away in the corner but misses a knee in the corner. Miz kicks the knee out an dhits the short DDT for two. Sheamus knocks him out to the floor and Mizdow runs over and falls down and hold his knee right along with Miz. Both guys go under the ring and Sheamus pulls out the wrong one, giving Miz a countout win at 5:16.

Rating: D+. Mizdown is going to be another big face turn sa the fans are getting into him for how hard he’s working on this stunt double thing. Best of all, it’s something new that he’s done to revitalize his career after falling through the floor over the last year. I’m assuming Miz gets his title shot at the PPV.

The Total Divas go up to see the Real Housewife of Atlanta when the evil Total Divas show up. Cameron and the reality chick have a Diva off and that’s about it. I’m sure we’ll see more.

Nikki Bella/Cameron/Summer Rae vs. Brie Bella/Natalya/Naomi

Rosa is in the latter team’s corner and Nene Leakes comes out to join her. Natalya shoves Cameron into the corner to start as Cole recaps Total Divas from last night. The heels take over on Natalya with Nikki cranking on a front facelock. Summer misses a legdrop and Brie comes in off the ice cold tag. Everything breaks down and Brie flips out of the Rack and gets the pin off the Bella 3:41.

Rating: D. Figure this one out for yourselves. Next.

Cena gives his usual fired up promo talking about how the showdown with Ambrose is going to be violent and against the Authority’s wishes.

New Wyatt video with the Family disappearing and Bray talking about how she told him he’d never be alone. He’s going to leave a path of smoke and destruction throughout the world. He says it’s coming and smoke fills the barn as he sits in his rocking chair.

The Authority comes out to watch.

John Cena vs. Dean Ambrose

Contract on a pole and the Authority, Rollins, Orton and Kane are all at ringside. Ambrose stomps away in the corner to start but Cena easily stops his climb. Four straight suplexes drop Ambrose but he blocks Cena’s bulldog. Dean has a chance at the contract but goes outside to slug it out with Cena. He suplexes Cena on the stage but messes up his own back, allowing Cena to get down to the ring for an electric chair save.

Both finishers are countered and Cena puts on the STF. Ambrose finally figures out to bite the hand to escape and dropkicks Cena to the floor. He still doesn’t climb and launches a suicide dive instead but goes over to nail Kane for some reason. The Authority is about to fight Ambrose but Cena nails Dean and throws him into the Authority. Orton comes in and goes after Cena (no DQ remember) as everyone gets inside. Ambrose sends Rollins outside and Kane eats an AA, allowing Dan to grab the contract for the win at 6:27.

Rating: C-. This was a mess but they had to protect both guys. It’s not a terrible match or anything but it wasn’t meant to be anything more than a way to set up the two Cell matches. And yes, one of those matches is going to be Cena vs. Orton XXXIV or so. Seriously I don’t think that’s much of an exaggeration.

The two matches stare each other down to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was the opposite of last week with a HEAVY focus on wrestling and very little stupid stuff. Yeah there’s the Divas stuff with the reality chick but that was about five minutes combined. I was dreading the reality stuff all night and the show actually won me over with some long matches and good seeds being planted for future stories. Really solid show this week and a huge relief after last week’s disaster.

Results

John Cena/Dean Ambrose b. Usos and Goldust/Stardust – AA to Goldust

AJ Lee/Layla b. Alicia Fox/Paige – Shining Wizard to Fox

Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler – RKO

Seth Rollins b. Jack Swagger – Rollup with a handful of tights

Rusev b. Big Show via DQ when Mark Henry interfered

Miz b. Sheamus via DQ when Mark Henry interfered

Brie Bella/Naomi/Natalya b. Nikki Bella/Cameron/Summer Rae – Bella Buster to Nikki Bella

Dean Ambrose b. John Cena – Ambrose pulled down the contract

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: September 29, 2014

At this point it’s pretty clear that Lesnar isn’t going to be defending the title at Hell in a Cell and at the end of the day, that’s probably the best thing they could do right now. Lesnar vs. Cena is a good feud but they need to give it a chance to breathe instead of just doing it over and over again to diminishing results. Instead we have Cena and Ambrose vs. the Authority which is a very nice option and far better than what we were sitting through at this point last year. Let’s get to it.

We opened with the Authority in the ring and Stephanie actually acknowledging the CM Punk chants in Chicago. They had to do something like that as the fans just want attention more than anything else. Heyman can out and had a chat with Rollins but not a lot was said. This felt like a way to distract the fans, because Heaven forbid we have a hot match to catch their attention because we need to have the twenty minute talking segment to open things up.

After all that was over, Rollins said he wanted the briefcase back because it has some personal items inside. Remember that as it’s going to be brought up later. Ambrose popped up on screen and said if Rollins wanted the briefcase, all he had to do was come and get it. This wasn’t the best opening segment in the world and it had the same problem most of them have: they spent twenty minutes to accomplish what could have been done in ten.

WWE doesn’t like breast cancer. This is the first of at least three times they would explain this.

HHH sent agents Joey Mercury and Jamie Noble to get the briefcase back. Those two as the new Patterson and Brisco is a fine idea. They wouldn’t find Ambrose until he came to the ring but apparently Jamie ate a hotdog at the concession stand. I can go with this going forward.

Ziggler retained the Intercontinental Title in a fast paced triple threat along with Cesaro and Miz. This was a good match with everyone moving around and Ziggler superkicking Cesaro to steal a pin on Miz. They can keep up the idea that Cesaro hasn’t gotten pinned clean yet and has a rematch coming to him. It’s like they’re building an actual division with progressing stories. That’s a VERY welcome change and something that could help the product quite a bit.

We get a Wyatt Family video which said Harper was free. This sounds like a way to split up the team and I’d prefer it over a fight. Bray could use some freshening up anyway.

Layla beat Rosa Mendes while Tyson Kidd messed with his phone. This is your Total Divas match and the first of three Divas matches tonight.

The big segment of the show was Ambrose coming to the ring with a bag and the briefcase. He offered to give away all the shirts because he didn’t like the prices on them. After throwing them into the crowd, the agents came in and tried to get the case back. This gave Ambrose the great line of “they’re sending the cruiserweight division after me?” Security came out (“weren’t you Rosebuds last week?”) and Ambrose left the case. Rollins opened it up and got covered with green slime. The look on Dean’s face was outstanding and sold the whole thing.

I’ve heard people calling this the segment that made Ambrose a star but that’s going a bit too far. This was very entertaining for one reason above all others: it was different. Those fourth wall jokes were funny and it made Ambrose feel like an outsider instead of the same old comedy guys. I remember JR talking about how bad comedy in wrestling can be if it’s not natural. With Dean, it felt natural and not like the script said “comedy segment here”. It’s definitely good though and the showdown in the Cell is going to be great.

Bo Dallas interrupted Mark Henry’s latest apology and beat him in about a minute. Henry destroyed Dallas in the back after a break.

Goldust and Stardust confirmed the Tag Team Titles were the Cosmic Key. Nothing else to see here.

Nikki and Brie did their usual argument and Brie had to face Cameron and Eva Marie in a handicap match. Amazingly enough, a former Divas Champion was able to beat a girl with maybe an hour combined ring time and a girl who doesn’t know how to make a proper cover. Nikki whining about having to be in a handful of handicap matches is really wearing thin and isn’t going to sell a big match between the Bellas.

Time for COMEDY with Heath Slater and Titus O’Neil beating Los Matadores. There was a bull, a gator and a Bunny involved. I can live with the Bunny because it’s showing off but the rest of the stuff was stupid. Again though, to people calling this the worst segment ever, I’d point out that the match wasn’t even three minutes long.

Rusev and Lana came out to yell at Big Show. The giant came out and ripped down the Russian flag. Naturally WWE issued an official apology about this because HEAVEN FORBID anyone get offended over something that is going to be forgotten after about thirty seconds. I’m complaining about this apology offending me. Where’s my official apology from WWE? I’m offended by how pathetic it is that people get offended by everything anymore. I WANT AN APOLOGY AND OFFICIAL STATEMENT! I MIGHT TELL PEOPLE TO PROTEST THE SHOW AND THAT MEANS THE STOCKHOLDERS MIGHT GET TICKED OFF!!!! LISTEN TO ME!!!!

Yeah I think some political correctness is stupid. Why do you ask?

Cena and Ambrose had a brief staredown in the back and tension was teased. They both want to beat up Rollins though.

Alicia Fox is Paige’s new best friend and beat AJ Lee in a nothing match. It’s better than repeating the same matches over and over again.

Sheamus beat Damien Sandow in another nothing match that doesn’t seem to set up anything.

Hulk Hogan doesn’t like cancer.

Stephanie told Kane and Orton that she doesn’t care about their complaints. Tension is being teased here.

Cena and Ambrose beat Orton and Kane when Rollins interfered. There was nothing to the match and it was your standard main event tag. Rollins gave both heroes curb stomps onto the briefcase to end the show.

This show was the standard Raw Special: it would have been great if it only lasted two hours, but the extra hour drags it down. The cancer stuff is going to get old in a hurry and comes off like more of a publicity stunt than anything else. Thank goodness we have another month of WWE saying CANCER SUCKS because they might come off as pro-cancer otherwise.

The wrestling wasn’t anything special but as usual they have a lot of good stuff coming up in the future. The problem though is them screwing up all of the upcoming stuff instead of it actually paying off. Or if nothing else they might have to worry about offending someone and apologizing for logical storylines. Again, either step on some toes or be perfect schoolchildren that don’t offend anyone and listen to the complaints that come with it. Pick something and stick with it though. Not a great show this week but it had its moments.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown – September 26, 2014: Why Do I Not Believe Them?

Smackdown
Date: September 26, 2014
Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

Things are in a state of flux right now with Roman Reigns out of the picture for the time being, leaving Dean Ambrose to take his spot. Dean has already been dealing with Cena, which puts him in about as big a spot as you could ask for. Ambrose still needs to rack up some wins though so hopefully that starts tonight. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We open with a recap of the events from Raw with Ambrose, Cena and the Authority.

Dean Ambrose vs. Miz

This is due to Ambrose attacking Miz on MizTV on Main Event. Miz bails to the floor to start before getting caught in a headlock and rollup for two. Ambrose sends him outside again but chases after him this time, eventually taking him down in the ring and hammering away. Miz begs him not in the face so Dean rakes at the Moneymaker. A bad looking Reality Check gets two for Miz and he stomps away as the fans are all behind Dean.

Ambrose comes right back with a dropkick to send Miz to the floor, followed by a big plancha. Mizdow offers a distraction though and Miz takes over as we take a break. Back with Dean blocking the corner clothesline with a forearm to the face. Cole actually gives us an explanation for how Dean got out of the room on Raw: “He went out the back door.”

Dean sends him to the floor and hits a suicide dive before a tornado DDT gets two. A missile dropkick is countered into the Figure Four but Dean is right by the ropes. The Rebound Clothesline drops Miz but here are Rollins and Kane for a distraction. Thankfully Dean is too smart for that and hits Dirty Deeds for the pin at 10:13.

Rating: C-. The match was fine and Dean getting a clean pin over a former World Champion is nothing but good for him right now. Miz isn’t exactly John Cena but he’s a guy that Dean should be beating like this. Also how nice is it that a good guy comes off looking smart for a change? Nice enough match.

The Authority comes in for the beatdown but Ambrose fights both of them off and runs off with the briefcase.

Stardust and Goldust are all insane and say the Gemini Usos can’t have the Tag Team Titles. The rematch is tonight.

Battle Royal

Cesaro, Heath Slater, Diego, Titus O’Neil, Fernando, Bo Dallas, Zack Ryder, Xavier Woods, Kofi Kingston, Sin Cara, Damien Mizdow, Justin Gabriel, Jack Swagger, Big E.

The winner gets an Intercontinental Title shot later tonight. Fernando is quickly tossed out and Bo dumps Cara. Cesaro tosses Diego but the new Nation can’t eliminate Dallas. Instead Kofi low bridges Gabriel out before Cesaro dumps Woods. Big E. has the power battle with Cesaro and is lifted up in a very impressive gorilla press. Titus breaks it up for no apparent reason so Cesaro lifts him up, only to have Big E. return the save. Cesaro is tired of all this and just muscles Big E. out.

We take a break and come back with no eliminations during the break. Titus and Ryder fight on the ropes and Zack gets tossed. Swagger eliminates Titus a few seconds later, leaving us with Cesaro, Slater, Swagger, Dallas, Mizdow and Kingston. Swagger throws Heath out and everyone surrounds Mizdow. The big beatdown is on and Mizdow is quickly out.

Kofi gets thrown over the top but skins the cat to pull Dallas to the apron with him. A kick to the head is enough to eliminate Bo as Swagger hits the Vader Bomb on Cesaro. Kofi tries to come back in with a hurricanrana but Jack catches him and drops Kofi into the opposite corner. Another Vader Bomb is blocked by Cesaro to send Swagger to the apron. Kofi hits a springboard shot to Jack’s head but has to save himself from Cesaro. Swagger gets back in but Cesaro throws Kofi at Swagger to eliminate both guys for the win at 11:25.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad and thankfully they kept things moving with only about eight minutes shown on TV. Cesaro is becoming a beast in these battle royals which could become a thing for him going forward. Also those displays of strength of his are hard to ignore with the gorilla presses and ending sequence being very impressive.

Network talk.

The Usos have everything ready to get their titles back.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Goldust/Stardust

The Dusts are defending in a rematch from Night of Champions. We get some big match intros and start with Jey and Stardust. A rollup gets a quick two for Jey and he slams Stardust down before sending him outside. Goldust is sent outside as well, setting up the double dive from the Usos as we take a break. Back with what looks like a hot tag to Jey who backdrops Goldust for two. Jey is sent into the buckle and out to the floor so Stardust can get in a few cheap shots of his own. Stardust: “WHERE’S THE KING???” Back in with Goldust dropping an elbow and cranking on the arm.

Jey loses his shirt and gets beaten on even more until he nails a forearm to drop Stardust. Goldust gets backdropped to the floor but he charges back in to a Samoan drop. The hot tag brings in Jimmy to clean house with a t-bone suplex to Stardust. The superkick misses though and Stardust sends him to the floor. Goldust tries a dive but the Usos catch him and toss him into the barricade. Stardust dives backwards onto both of them and all four are down. Back in and the Usos nail a Doomsday Device of all things on Stardust. Jimmy hits the Superfly Splash but Goldust comes in with the title belt for the DQ at 10:13.

Rating: C+. These teams have good chemistry and the match was working here. It sets up a third match, likely at the PPV, which should be just as good as this with extra time. The Usos are getting close to being a great team and having opponents like this and the Wyatts are only going to make them better.

We recap Ambrose stealing the briefcase.

Rollins is ticked off but Kane says the briefcase doesn’t matter because it’s all about the contract. Seth gets that but says if the briefcase isn’t returned, the cinder blocks will look like child’s play.

Layla/Summer Rae vs. Natalya/Rosa Mendes

Summer runs from Natalya to start so it’s quickly off to Layla. They trade rollups and Layla has to kick away from the Sharpshooter. Off to Summer who gets suplexed down and kneed in the corner but Layla makes a blind tag. She nails one kick and immediately tags back out to Summer. The villains ask Natalya if she’s going to cry as Rosa tries to play cheerleader on the apron.

Layla hooks a figure four neck lock and bends back over the ropes before hitting a dropkick to the side of the head. Summer comes back in for a bodyscissors and slams Natalya head first into the mat. Natalya kicks Summer away and makes the tag to Rosa (Cole: “Latina Heat!”) for a bad dropkick on Layla for two. Everything breaks down and Natalya kicks Summer to the floor, allowing Layla to roll Rosa up for the pin at 4:16.

Rating: D. There are a bunch of problems with this whole story. To begin with, why did Natalya wait about three months to go after Summer? Second, it’s really hard to care about these catty fights the girls are having, especially when some of them are capable of having good matches. The words “some of them” is the final key point. Rosa Mendes is about as worthless of a Diva as there has ever been. As far as I know, she has never won a singles match on TV. Why should I think it’s a big deal when she comes back?

We look at Main Event where Mark Henry wasn’t going to apologize to America again because he thinks they don’t appreciate him. Big Show came out and promises to knock Rusev out on Smackdown.

Big Show says he and Henry are brothers from another mother so he’ll knock Rusev out in Henry’s honor tonight.

We get the video on Reigns in the hospital and hear from the doctor on his prognosis.

Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Cesaro

Dolph is defending. Feeling out process to start with Ziggler taking him up against the ropes. Cesaro actually tries a monkey flip but Dolph lands on his feet and hiptosses him down. After a quick trip to the floor, Cesaro cranks on a chinlock and drops the champion with a belly to back suplex.

Ziggler gets caught in an abdominal stretch to stay on his ribs before a middle rope elbow gets two for Cesaro. Off to a modified cobra clutch on Dolph but he jawbreaks his way to freedom. A nice dropkick puts Cesaro down but he counters the Fameasser into a powerbomb, only to have Dolph climb over the shoulder into a rollup for the pin at 6:22. Cesaro clearly had the rope at two so there’s likely going to be a rematch.

Rating: C. Nice power vs. speed match here with Cesaro keeping the champion down and using his power to negate the high flying. The ending is a good way to keep Cesaro’s credibility and set up another match down the line. They could do better with more than six minutes so hopefully they’re given a good deal of time later.

The announcers point out the rope grab and Cesaro yells at the referee.

WWE2K15 stuff.

Lana and Rusev say their usual.

Rusev vs. Big Show

Show goes right at him to start and nails a running clothesline in the corner. There’s a loud chop and another clothesline but Rusev blocks the whisper chop. Big Show comes back with a sunset flip for two and knocks Rusev out to the floor. We take a break and come back with Big Show hitting a few loud chops in the corner but getting his leg taken out.

Rusev goes after the leg with some elbows before cranking on it on the mat. Show fights up with a side slam for two but misses the Knockout Punch. The jumping superkick drops Big Show for two and it’s off to a side choke. Back up and the giant hits some clotheslines followed by the chokeslam but Lana grabs his foot before the Knockout Punch. The distraction lets Rusev hit him with the Russian flag for the DQ at 9:52.

Rating: D. This was ten minutes of “Big Show chops, they do nothing, Big Show chops again, they do nothing, finish.” Rusev beating up Big Show next is another good win for him as he’s getting closer to the top of the card with these wins. He’s still waiting for the big feud but he’s still working well enough. As for Big Show, anything that keeps him away from the main event scene is a good thing.

Big Show knocks him out and Lana is stunned to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Tonight was a different kind of episode as some stuff seemed to matter. We set up a new challenger for Dolph and had Ambrose steal the briefcase which will likely be dealt with on Raw. The wrestling was nothing to see but more than anything else Smackdown needs to have stuff that actually matters. Smackdown needs to be a show that people want to see and two title matches and a battle royal are good ways to get to that point. Granted I have little reason to believe this is going to last as it almost never does but it was an easy show to sit through.

Results

Dean Ambrose b. Miz – Dirty Deeds

Cesaro won a battle royal last eliminating Kofi Kingston and Jack Swagger

Usos b. Goldust/Stardust via DQ when Goldust hit Jimmy with a title belt

Layla/Summer Rae b. Rosa Mendes/Natalya – Rollup to Mendes

Dolph Ziggler b. Cesaro – Rollup

Big Show b. Rusev via DQ when Rusev hit him with the Russian flag

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown – September 19, 2014: Wake Me Up When September Ends

Smackdown
Date: September 19, 2014
Location: Mississippi Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tom Phillips, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for Night of Champions and since this is Friday, we’re not likely to see Cena or Lesnar, meaning nothing important is going to happen tonight. WWE has done a very bad job building up everything other than the main event for Sunday and it really shows when Cena and Lesnar aren’t on the show. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Reigns vs. Rusev. Just get to the DQ now.

Jimmy Uso vs. Stardust

The brothers that look different say they’re coming for the titles. Jimmy and Stardust fight up against the ropes to start until a neckbreaker puts Jimmy down. Uso tries three superkicks and connects with the final one for the pin at 2:00.

Goldust gets kicked as well.

Sheamus/Dolph Ziggler vs. Miz/Cesaro

Haven’t we seen this one a few times now? Cesaro tries to ride Ziggler on the mat but the champion gets away. A slam takes Ziggler down again and Cesaro cranks on a headlock. Back up and Cesaro counters a sunset flip and lifts Dolph all the way into a gorilla press. It’s an awesome power display but Ziggler slips down the back and nails a dropkick. Off to Miz for a kick to the face for two and some posing. He avoids the Fameasser and hooks the Reality Check for two.

We come back from a break with Miz getting two off a top rope ax handle and putting on a chinlock. Dolph counters with a jawbreaker but Cesaro blocks a tag attempt. That earns him the swinging DDT and the hot tag brings in Sheamus. Miz gets caught in the fifteen forearms to the chest and the rolling fireman’s carry gets two. The Irish Curse gets the same and Ziggler backdrops Cesaro to the floor, possibly injuring the big man’s knee. The stunt doubles get into it and Ziggler superkicks Miz into the Brogue Kick for the pin at 11:43.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad but did anyone buy Miz having a chance to pin Sheamus? He has the character down but he needs something different in the ring. I still think a switch to tights would help him a lot, though that doesn’t seem to be a possibility. Also let him get some wins with the Finale to build the move back up a bit.

Adam Rose vs. Heath Slater

Slater decks him with a right hand and Rose is in early trouble. He gets a boot up to stop a charging Heath in the corner and a high cross body gets two. Slater stomps him down in the corner again but misses a knee drop. Rose comes back with some forearms and a spinebuster but Titus trips him up. This brings in the Bunny who dives on Titus, setting up the Party Foul for the pin at 2:55.

We recap Henry and Rusev from Raw. This eats up over a minute.

Lana and Rusev are in the back and Lana speaks Russian about Henry and Reigns. Rusev does the same and that’s about it.

Los Matadores/Big Show vs. Wyatt Family

I could have sworn this was originally going to be the Usos. Big Show does Torito’s entrance in a funny bit. This is joined in progress with Fernando doing OLE to Rowan. Thankfully Erick picks him up for a fall away slam into the Wyatt corner. Off to Bray for the backsplash before Harper comes in and gets caught in a sunset flip. His response is to hit Fernando really hard in the face, though Fernando is able to get over to the corner for a tag to Big Show.

Rowan comes in as well and takes out Show’s leg, allowing Wyatt to hammer on a downed giant. Harper Gator Rolls Big Show and drops him with a dropkick. The Family starts some fast tagging but Show rolls to the floor and headbutts Wyatt. Bray stops a tag attempt though and Harper hooks a chinlock. That’s fine with Big Show who lifts Luke up and slams him down for a break.

Show misses a Vader Bomb elbow and it’s back to Bray for a chinlock of his own. Wyatt is slammed down just like Luke was and the hot tag finally brings in Diego. Everything breaks down and the Wyatts destroy Los Matadores with ease. Diego dives out to nail Harper but Sister Abigail takes him out for the pin at 8:10 shown.

Rating: D+. The stuff with Big Show in there was good enough, but at some point you have to get the tag off to a Matadore and there’s no way around that. I’m glad to see Bray get a win again but he needs to get back to his over the top stuff and a big win over a top guy. He can go in the ring but that Cena feud ripped his legs off.

We look at Reigns vs. Rollins from Monday.

Reigns is ready for tonight and Sunday because the Punch is ready.

Paige vs. Nikki Bella

Non-title and AJ comes out to do commentary. Nikki shoves her down to start and nails a middle rope spinning kick to the head for two. Paige gets knocked to the floor but she knocks Nikki off the apron just as quickly. Back in and Paige kicks her in the ribs but gets caught with some dropkicks. Not that they matter as the Paige Turner is enough to pin Bella at 2:57.

Post match Paige and AJ do their usual with AJ holding the title. Nikki lays them both out and holds up the belt, despite getting pinned about a minute earlier.

Bo Dallas vs. Jack Swagger

Rematch from Raw where Jack made Dallas tap. Jack takes him into the corner to start but Bo slaps him in the face. A chase goes badly for Bo with Swagger clotheslining him hard. Dallas is sent hard into the table but grabs a neckbreaker to take over back inside. Swagger comes right back with a suplex and Vader Bomb but Bo runs to the floor again. Another chase results in Swagger’s throat being snapped across the top rope, setting up the Bodog for the pin at 2:48. Another short match in a series of them tonight.

Bo says the usual post match and says Jack will wind up being like Zeb Colter if he keeps up. Colter stole three packs of sugar and is a TERRIBLE TIPPER! Jack wouldn’t want to be someone like that would he? Swagger chases him off.

Long package on Cena vs. Lesnar with clips from the brawl on Monday spliced together with the sitdown interviews from Lesnar and Heyman.

This week’s sitdown interview was with Lesnar, who called himself a prize fighter. In this fight, John Cena is going to get another beating.

Henry feels good about his rally on Monday but admits he lots to a Russian in 1992. Another Russian defeated him in 1996 even though he was injured. This Sunday, he will crush Rusev.

Roman Reigns vs. Rusev

They lock up to start and fall out to the floor before heading right back inside. Reigns nails a big running elbow to the face but gets caught with a kick to his own face. Rusev puts on a quickly broken bearhug before dropping Roman with a spinwheel kick. We take a break and come back with Reigns caught in a reverse bearhug. Reigns fights up and hits a running clothesline to put both guys down.

Rusev charges into a Samoan drop and Reigns hammers away. The Apron Kick looks to set up the spear but Rollins comes out for a distraction. Rusev kicks Roman in the jaw and starts working on the back. The Accolade is countered with something like Cena’s ProtoBomb but with Reigns driving Rusev down (he basically throws him into the air and clotheslines Rusev’s stomach) but Rollins comes in off the top with the briefcase, accidentally hitting Rusev for the DQ at 9:27.

Rating: C-. The problem here was the same one that so many of these matches have: we were just waiting on the run-in for the DQ because neither of these guys were going to lose this match clean. Rusev getting the win is an interesting choice but it’s not like it really matters one way or another.

Reigns and Rollins brawl into the crowd and here’s Henry for the brawl. The American flag comes down and Henry slams Rusev to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Another week, another basic Smackdown. The wrestling was fine but most of it was too short to rate. It really didn’t do much as far as making me want to see Night of Champions, but the show has pretty much been dead in the water for the last two weeks. This show just came and went without anything to see, which makes for an uninteresting show to sit through. It did go by really fast though which always helps.

 

Results

Jimmy Uso b. Stardust – Superkick

Sheamus/Dolph Ziggler b. Miz/Cesaro – Brogue Kick to Miz

Adam Rose b. Heath Slater – Party Foul

Wyatt Family b. Los Matadores/Big Show – Sister Abigail to Diego

Paige b. Nikki Bella – Paige Turner

Bo Dallas b. Jack Swagger – Bodog

Rusev b. Roman Reigna via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – September 12, 2014: Time For A Tag Match Playa

Smackdown
Date: September 12, 2014
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Tom Phillips

We’re coming off a good Raw for the first time in far too long and the main story is Reigns getting taken out to end the show. It looks like we’re heading for Reigns vs. Rollins and Jericho vs. Orton, though they would likely be better off with just having a tag match instead. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of Raw and Reigns taking a Curb Stomp onto a chair.

Usos/Big Show/Mark Henry vs. Wyatt Family/Goldust/Stardust

This is just Harper and Rowan and not a handicap match if that isn’t clear. Jimmy chops on Goldust in the corner to start before doing the same to Stardust. Jey comes in to choke on the ropes a bit and start in on the arm. Back to Jimmy to face Harper with Luke missing a clothesline and getting dropkicked down. Mark gets the tag for a splash in the corner but Luke clotheslines him down for two. Bray comes down to ringside but Big Show stands in his way as we take a break.

Back with Jimmy superkicking Harper and nailing him with an enziguri. Bray is nowhere in sight. Luke backdrops him to the apron and Jimmy slips off, injuring his own knee. Stardust likes what he sees and sends Jimmy into the announcers’ table before handing it off to Goldust. A clothesline to the back of the head gets two and it’s back to Harper with a dropkick for two. Rowan comes in for a knee drop to give us a complete set of heels not going after the injured limb.

Not that it matters though as Jimmy is able to Samoan drop Rowan on the bad knee. Goldust comes in and gets superkicked, allowing for the hot tag to Big Show for some house cleaning. Stardust takes the worst of it but the Dusts are actually able to suplex Big Show down. The Wyatts take Henry to the floor, allowing Jimmy to dive onto everyone. The Disaster Kick staggers Show but he comes back with the KO Punch and a Superfly Splash from Jey pins Stardust at 11:04.

Rating: C-. What was the point in having Jimmy hurt his knee if they were just going to forget about it thirty seconds later? At least have someone kick the leg a few times after it. That being said, I’d definitely prefer not to have two members of a team both having leg injuries as the injured limb is being overused as it is. The match wasn’t bad but just kind of there.

We recap Heyman and Cena from Raw.

Kane praises Reigns and Rollins for their actions on Raw. Rollins says he knew he could get inside Reigns’ head and promises to take him out tonight. It’s Reigns/Jericho vs. Orton/Rollins later.

Bo Dallas vs. Justin Gabriel

Colter and Swagger are at ringside. After the bell, Dallas says most of the fans are destined to be failures for their entire lives, but they could be just like him if they just Bolieve! Dallas calls himself America’s Sweetheart and asks everyone to put their hand over their heart, but Zeb interrupts. He says if Dallas is America’s Sweetheart, then he’s “Arianna freaking Grande. And I don’t even know who that is!”

After a minute and a half of talking, Gabriel starts firing off kicks and rolls Dallas up for two. A hard whip sends Gabriel into the buckle and we hit the chinlock. Gabriel comes back with a springboard cross body and an STO but the moonsault misses, setting up the Bodog for the pin at 4:10.

Rating: D+. It’s almost not fair to rate this as they only fought for about two minutes after all the talking. The match was every Bo Dallas match you’ve seen yet but that’s fine in this case as he finally has something to do. I’m glad he didn’t get the “Vince is bored with you” treatment that so many others have suffered through as Dallas has potential to be a good pest.

Dallas runs from Swagger post match.

Paige vs. Summer Rae

Non-title. AJ is on commentary of course. Summer stomps away in the corner to start and puts on a full nelson leg lock. Paige fights out with a headbutt and some clotheslines followed by a series of knees to the ribs. A Black Widow makes Summer tap at 1:46.

AJ comes in and lays out Summer with the Paige Turner before skipping away. Paige freaks out again.

It’s time for some good old fashioned arm wrestling between Rusev and Mark Henry. Before the match, Lana offers Henry a chance to get out of the match by forfeiting. She brings up Henry leaving the Olympics with an injury but Henry will have none of it. He never thought he would have the chance to represent his country again and there’s the USA chant. Henry easily wins in a few seconds. Rusev wants a rematch left handed and Lana throws powder in Henry’s face so Rusev can beat him down.

Jericho talks about losing the cage match on his own terms. He can live with that, but he can’t live with Orton attacking him to make a statement. Jericho calls himself the Snake Shredder and the Copperhead Crusher and promises to take care of Orton. We get a hiss to cap things off.

Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Dolph Ziggler/R-Truth

Ziggler says Truth (R-Ziggler) is his stunt double tonight and we get Truth in Dolph attire, complete with the hip swivel on the stage. JBL and Cole are nice enough to play up the joke. Mizdow vs. Ziggler to start but it’s quickly off to Truth for Dolph’s big elbow and two. Off to a front facelock from Ziggler before the good guys try to do a twin switch in a funny bit. A pair of hiptosses and clotheslines put Miz and Mizdow on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Ziggler crawling over to tag in Truth who is still wrestling like Dolph. Mizdow takes a right hand for his boss, allowing Miz to kick Truth in the face. The Reality Check gets two for Miz but Truth escapes the same thing from Mizdow. Back to Miz who walks into a DDT, allowing for the hot tag to Dolph. Everything breaks down and the good guys use each others’ signature moves, capped off by Truth hitting a Zig Zag on Mizdow to give Dolph the pin at 11:04.

Rating: C+. The wrestling wasn’t great but this was at least a funny idea and the announcers played up the joke really well. Dolph did say that this was one night only, which is for the best as it would get old fast. For a one off joke though, it advances the story and keeps us from having Miz vs. Ziggler one on one again.

We look at the Bellas and Springer segment from Raw.

Nikki talks about how she’s been the victim for years when AJ comes in and says Nikki got into the title match by being Stephanie’s lap dog. Paige comes in and says she’ll beat AJ one last time so they can be best friends. Nikki thinks this could be easy.

Chris Jericho/Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins/Randy Orton

The brawl quickly heads to the floor and Reigns wants to get his hands on Orton. Reigns gets sent face first into the announcers’ table though and we take a break. Back with Orton hitting a running clothesline in the corner and putting on the chinlock. Roman fights up and slams Orton down to make the tag off to Jericho.

Chris cleans house and sends Rollins into the buckle before putting on the Walls. He has to let go to take care of Orton but comes right back with a bulldog. Orton breaks up the Lionsault though and the Authority takes over again. Randy hammers away and gets two off the powerslam. Rollins comes back in and gets backdropped to the floor, only to circle around and break up the tag to Reigns.

Jericho fights up and dropkicks Randy, allowing the hot tag to Roman. The big man cleans house and sends Rollins to the floor before tagging in Jericho for a high cross body on Orton. The former Shield members head into the crowd as Orton loads up the Elevated DDT, only to have Jericho counter into a rollup for the pin at 12:09.

Rating: C-. This was short, energetic and set up the matches at Night of Champions. It’s fine to have Jericho win here as losing to a former World Champion on a quick rollup is hardly going to crush Orton. Reigns and Rollins weren’t really a factor in this but their story is already set up.

Overall Rating: C. Tonight was a by the book episode of Smackdown: advance everything but the main event, have some tag matches and recap stuff from Raw. It’s just a supplement to Raw but I’ll take that over a lot of boring episodes that we so often get. There’s nothing to see here but it could have been far worse.

Results

Usos/Big Show/Mark Henry b. Wyatt Family/Goldust/Stardust – Superfly Splash to Stardust

Bo Dallas b. Justin Gabriel – Bodog

Paige b. Summer Rae – Black Widow

Dolph Ziggler/R-Truth b. Damien Mizdow/Miz – Ziggler pinned Mizdow after a Zig Zag from R-Truth

Chris Jericho/Randy Orton b. Seth Rollins/Randy Orton – Rollup to Orton




Smackdown – September 5, 2014: Holla Holla Holla!

Smackdown
Date: September 5, 2014
Location: Pinnacle Bank Arena, Lincoln, Nebraska
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

I really hope this show is better than Raw as I can’t imagine things getting much worse. This week’s episode of Raw was one of the least interesting and flat out horrible shows that I can remember in a very long time. To make things even worse, tonight we have Paige vs. Brie Bella as the story that swallowed the WWE is moving to Fridays. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Cena to get things going. He immediately gets a cheap pop by talking about wearing red at the University of Nebraska. In less than three weeks, we’re done with lawsuits and what’s best for business because he’s going to fight Brock Lesnar for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. He isn’t going to come out here and just do the Queen’s wave because it’s what the company thinks he should do.

At Night of Champions, he’s going to fight because that’s what he does. The day he comes down here not wanting to be champion again is the day he walks out the door. The fans actually start a loud CENA chant (complete with shots of the crowd to show it’s legitimate) for the first time in longer than I can remember. He knows this is going to be a fight but he’s going to take Lesnar on and fight. Then he’ll tell the Authority to line them up so he can knock them down and you can still get the WWE Network for $9.99.

Cena is on a roll here but Kane and Rollins come down to interrupt. They accuse Cena of having a mid career crisis but John isn’t going to take advise from a demon brother of a dead guy who is now the spokesman for Men’s Warehouse. Kane threatens to put Cena in a match but this brings out Roman Reigns. Roman says he’s going to finish his business with Randy Orton on Monday and would love to start tonight, but Orton isn’t here. Therefore he can focus on Kane and Rollins, so let’s get started right now.

Cena is ready to go but Kane and Rollins say not so fast. Rollins says the Authority is one step ahead of them and we’ve got Wyatts. This brings out Jericho, Big Show and Mark Henry. We’re still not done yet though as HHH comes out, says “let me tell you something playa” (seriously) and makes a ten man tag. “Now how about that playa?” And, complete with a leg in the air and a one armed raising the roof, “HOLLA!” AND TEDDY LONG’S MUSIC PLAYS!!! This was a very solid opening segment with Cena nailing the promo and HHH cracking me up.

Cesaro vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title and Sheamus is on commentary. Cesaro takes him down and grabs a quick chinlock, only to get caught by a neckbeaker. Ziggler’s jumping elbow gets two but he walks into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to put Dolph down. A European uppercut drops Ziggler again but Cesaro goes outside to jaw with Sheamus before covering. He cranks on a cravate for a bit before a gorilla press gutbuster gets two more.

We take a break and come back with Ziggler nailing a jawbreaker to escape another cravate. Ziggler loads up the splash in the corner but dives into another uppercut for another two. Dolph spins around Cesaro’s shoulders and grabs a sleeper. That goes nowhere so Ziggler counters Swiss Death with the jumping DDT for a near fall of his own. Cesaro gets back up and tries the Neutralizer but gets rolled up for the pin at 6:51 shown of 10:21.

Rating: C-. The match was the decent action you would expect from these two, but the booking continues to make my head hurt. You either job a champion or you job a guy that is getting a title shot in a few weeks. Why WWE felt the need to book this is beyond me, but the fact that they see nothing wrong with pushing the Bellas this much and jobbing Cesaro clean before he gets a title shot should tell you everything you need to know.

Cesaro pounds on Ziggler post match but Sheamus makes the save. They yell at each other until Sheamus throws the belt at Cesaro and lays him out with a Brogue Kick.

Stardust talks about needing what they have and about one of the Usos being hurt. He keeps turning around and changes his tone every time. Apparently they have a title shot at Night of Champions.

Jimmy Uso vs. Heath Slater

Jey is on a crutch. Jimmy misses a quick superkick attempt and gets caught in a neckbreaker for two. Slater stomps away and hooks a chinlock before sending Jimmy into the corner. Uso fights out and nails a Whisper in the Wind for two. He has to kick Titus down though and walks into a side kick for two. Cole: “The Gator is down!” JBL: “Call Skinner!” Back up and the superkick knocks Slater out of the air and the Superfly Splash is good for the pin at 2:59.

We look back at the Divas segment from Raw.

Stephanie announces Nikki vs. AJ vs. Paige for the title at Night of Champions.

Nikki thanks Stephanie for her announcement and says she’s finally learning what it means to have a real sister. She talks about being treated horribly by her sister all her life.

Here are Lana and Rusev to respond to Mark Henry. Lana says we’re in America’s heartland but that’s an oxymoron because America has no heart. If it had one though, it would be made in China. America used to be great but is soon to be nothing, just like Mark Henry. This brings out Mark who says he challenged Rusev, but that isn’t the question. The question is whether Rusev is going to accept the challenge or hide behind the woman that looks like an escort. Lana accepts the challenge on Rusev’s behalf and Henry promises to give him a red white and blue whipping.

Jerry Springer will be having an intervention with the Bellas on Raw. Oh dear.

Paige vs. Brie Bella

Non-title, AJ is on commentary and Nikki is at ringside. Brie has her own music now and it’s the generic pop rock song you would expect it to be. Brie takes her to the mat to start and we’re quickly in the catfight. Paige gets taken down out of a lockup but pulls Brie out to the floor. Back in and Paige crawls onto Brie as AJ makes some comments about missing her baby. Brie comes back with clotheslines and a running knee to the chest. The fans chant YES but AJ and Nikki are in a fight on the floor. Brie hits a missile dropkick as AJ beats up Nikki, sending Brie outside for a save. She heads back in for the Rampaige and the pin at 4:27.

Rating: D+. The catfighting makes me think the Bella showdown is going to be an even bigger disaster than I thought. Brie can be passable in the ring but Nikki has never proven herself capable of having more than a bad match. This was nothing special and was more about the drama than the wrestling, which is better in a way but still bad.

Harper says Wyatt is a serpent and the rat can’t run fast enough. Bray tells Jericho that he has to pay for his sins on Monday. Rowan adds in a RUN.

Bo Dallas vs. Zack Ryder

Ryder dropkicks him at the bell and nails a faceplant, only to have Bo pop up for the Bodog and the pin at 43 seconds.

Post match Bo says everyone must be living in Nebraska because of some horrible choices in their lives. If Jack Swagger can turn their lives around, so can everyone else. He’s about to start his own WE THE PEOPLE when Swagger hits the ring and beats him up.

We see the Rollins/Ambrose/Reigns stuff again.

Roman Reigns/John Cena/Chris Jericho/Big Show/Mark Henry vs. Wyatt Family/Kane/Seth Rollins

We get a LOUD Y2J chant as Big Show starts with Rollins. The giant hits his loud chop in the corner and brings in Henry for a splash. Big Show loads up a gorilla press but Rollins escapes and tags in Wyatt. Bray is quickly thrown around so it’s off to Rowan for the big man showdown. Show busts out a sunset flip for two followed by a hard shoulder block. He rips open Erick’s coveralls for a chop before it’s back to Henry for another splash.

Jericho comes in to a big pop and nails Erick with a dropkick to the side of Rowan’s head. We take a break and come back with Kane dropkicking Big Show’s knee out. Off to Wyatt for some stomping before Harper slaps on a chinlock. Big Show fights up but gets dropkicked down for two, with the kickout sending Harper out to the floor. Seth comes in to work on the leg before quickly tagging in Wyatt. A DDT gets two and it’s already back to Harper for a headlock.

Big Show suplexes him down and finally makes the tag off to Reigns to clean house. A Samoan drop to puts Harper down but they head to the floor where the numbers game results in Reigns being sent into the barricade. We take another break and come back with Rowan holding Reigns in the skull crusher. Reigns is sent to the floor and Rollins whips him into the barricade while talking trash. Back in for another chinlock but Reigns powers up, only to get kicked in the head.

Harper comes in again as Cena is pacing around on the floor playing cheerleader. Reigns suplexes Luke down but charges into a big boot for two. It’s back to Kane who walks into a running clothesline and the hot tag brings in Jericho. A top rope shot to the head puts Kane down and the Lionsault connects, only to have Kane pop up and grab him for a chokeslam. Jericho counters with an enziguri but can’t get the Walls.

Bray comes in for a save and it’s quickly back to Harper as we take an almost unheard of third break. Back with Rollins working over Jericho with some right hands. Jericho backdrops Rollins to the floor but Seth dives back in to pull Jericho away from the tag. Bray headbutts him a few times and puts on another chinlock.

The running cross body gets two but Bray is down as well. Wyatt spiders up but Jericho elbows out of a Rock Bottom. A dropkick puts Bray down and we FINALLY get the tag to Cena. Everything breaks down and the parade of secondary finishers begins. With everyone else down, Cena puts Rollins in the STF but the Wyatts all come in for the DQ at 17:49 shown of 28:19.

Rating: C+. The match was decent but it felt long more than anything else. They’re doing a good job of making Cena look explosive but I still think they’re keeping the title on Lesnar at the PPV. It doesn’t make sense to have Brock dominate that much at Summerslam and then have Cena win just because he’s fighting harder. The match was good enough and was a decent enough use of half an hour.

The good guys all hit their finishers with Cena planting Rollins with an AA to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The show was nothing great but man alive does that one less hour make a difference. It doesn’t drag things down and makes the show much easier to sit through. That and a lack of recaps really helps things along. The main event was decent enough but it took away a lot of matches that could have filled out the card. At least the ten man match was a fourth of the show so everything else wasn’t left hanging. It says a lot when a totally average show is miles ahead of Raw. Granted HHH’s Teddy Long stuff was hilarious.

Results

Dolph Ziggler b. Cesaro – Rollup

Jimmy Uso b. Heath Slater – Superfly Splash

Paige b. Brie Bella – Rampaige

Bo Dallas b. Zack Ryder – Bodog

John Cena/Big Show/Roman Reigns/Mark Henry/Chris Jericho b. Seth Rollins/Kane/Wyatt Family via DQ when the Wyatt Family attacked Cena at the same time

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Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: September 1, 2014

Raw was a holiday show this week and it was a mess like it almost always is. However this week went further into the drek than it’s gone in a long time. I’m sure you’ve heard all of the problems already but I don’t think I accurately described how horrible it really was. Let’s get to it.

We started with the traditional long interview with a backdrop of the Highlight Reel. Jericho’s guest was supposed to be Randy Orton but he got every male member of the Authority instead. HHH talked about how he was considering changing Brock’s opponent for Night of Champions. Everyone suggested they should get the shot in Cena’s place.

This of course drew out Cena to say he’s going to be ready and he actually threatened a lawsuit if HHH changed things. We can file this in the category of STUPID IDEAS THAT WWE USES EVERY FREAKING MONTH AND FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS GOOD AND HOLY CUT IT OUT ALREADY! Anyway, Cena talks about how he’ll be COO and will fire HHH if he changes the match. HHH laughs this off and says he knows Cena has changed. Orton took the mic and insulted Reigns, which of course brought him down. The obvious six man was made as a way for HHH to determine who wants it the most.

We got a good midcard tag match with the champions Dolph Ziggler/Sheamus vs. their respective challengers in The Miz/Cesaro. The wrestling wasn’t bad but the ending was creative. Miz (who had a makeup lady and director’s chair) tagged in his stunt double Damien Mizdow to take the Zig Zag with him. Ziggler got caught up in the heat of the moment and got caught by the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin.

There’s an actual story here and it’s getting interesting for the most part. That’s a rare thing for the midcard scene and it’s very refreshing. Miz continues to nail this character. He won’t be World Champion but it’s a great midcard character for him to rebuild his career. I’ve always been a fan of the guy and it’s good to see him getting another chance like this.

Now we get to the part of the show that everyone hated. Well one of them at least. We got the first of the Growing Up Bella segments, which consisted of Nikki telling stories about how horrible Brie was growing up. These ranged from Brie stealing her prom date, costing Nikki her driver’s license and wrecking their car to Nikki taking Brie’s high school exams for her.

These were treated like the most dramatic moments in history and as you would expect, Nikki Bella ruined any drama they could have had. This is the problem with the whole Bella storys (among other things): the Bellas can’t act and the stories are so over the top that they can’t be taken seriously. I have no idea why I’m supposed to care about whatever nonsense they had like fifteen years ago or however long it was. I understand that this is to make people watch Total Divas, but for the love of all things good and holy, if this is what is popular on reality TV, I shudder at the future of the human race.

In case you didn’t get it the first time, we had a horrible eight Divas tag to promote the show even more. It lasted a minute and ended in a big brawl. Again, I understand that it’s cross promotion, but this is making the whole division look like an even bigger joke than it ever has, and that’s covering a lot of ground.

Mark Henry and Big Show beat the Wyatts via DQ when Rusev interfered. This is the third time these teams have fought in a few weeks and these matches are getting weaker every time. It’s not that they’re bad, but they’ve pretty much done everything they could to each other at this point so why would I want to see them fight even more?

Michael Sam was invited to Raw next week. Even though he hadn’t accepted yet and there was a very solid chance he could get signed to an NFL practice squad, WWE put him on a graphic saying next week. This screams of desperation and a way to make people care about them when Monday Night Football debuts next week. Instead of having good action, they’re resorting to gimmicks because they’ve wasted so much stuff over the last few months.

Oh and Sam signed with the Dallas Cowboys so he’s not going to be on Raw, making the whole thing a waste of time.

Recap of last week with Cena, Lesnar and Heyman’s promos.

Heyman talked about how hard Cena is working but insists it won’t matter. Short and sweet here.

Jack Swagger beat Curtis Axel in a short match with the Patriot Lock. After the match, Bo Dallas had three people talk about how Swagger ruined their lives by losing to Rusev. This was a hilarious bit and makes me like Dallas even more. Just like the tag match earlier, it’s nice to see the midcard getting some attention. Above all else though, they’re actually using some fresh stories instead of the same nonsense over and over.

Adam Rose beat Titus O’Neil in a nothing match that was more focused on Heath Slater vs. the bunny. Again, instead of doing something interesting or important, this is what we get on Raw.

Rusev squashed Ryder and got chased off by Mark Henry. More filler but at least it helped build a story and made sense given what happened earlier.

Stephanie brought out Nikki Bella and gave her a Divas Title shot. Brie came out and they did their usual schtick with Nikki ranting about Bryan leaving Brie one day and Nikki will be the Bella everyone is talking about. AJ Lee came out and talked about how she’s the #1 contender and how she’s getting the shot. Paige came out and said she’s the Divas Champion but Nikki and Brie took over the segment again with Nikki shouting that she’ll forgive Brie if she quits again and doesn’t come back. Brie shoved Nikki down and left, AJ picked up the title but handed it back to Stephanie, and Paige just kind of looked around.

Somehow that segment took the better part of fifteen minutes. Again, this is designed to make people care about Total Divas and give the show drama, but now it’s looking like it’s taking over the Divas Title as well. Everything Paige and AJ have done is being sacrificed for the sake of giving the producers of the most overly scripted reality show I’ve ever seen extra drama. We now get to listen to the Bellas talk about betrayal and all their drama and dear goodness is it going to be bad.

At the end of the day, the biggest problem is this leads to Nikki vs. Brie, likely in a major match. If I stretch, I might be able to think of three Bella matches that are worth watching. They’re just not good workers but it’s going to be a big focus of the shows going forward because we need more drama for Total Divas. The match is going to be a disaster because it’s going to be treated like the most important thing ever and the overacting is going to cripple it. It’s not exactly Once In A Lifetime or the Mega Powers Exploding and the build is horrible. But hey, the ratings for Total Divas might be up because there’s a huge crossover there right?

Jericho vs. Wyatt in a cage next week so Bray talked about a rat running from a snake.

Goldust beat Jimmy Uso in another nothing match. Goldust crushed Jey’s already injured knee after the match to cement the heel turn.

Big Show told Henry he’d have his back against Rusev but Henry wants to do it himself. This seems to set up Show’s latest heel turn.

The six man main event was fine and built on the story of Cena finally getting in and cleaning house. However, after he got the tag and destroyed everyone, Cena tagged out to Reigns for the spear and the pin. There really wasn’t much great here but the match was long and the first good wrestling we had all night.

Raw this week was a borderline disaster and a lot of it was due to the Bellas. I’ve said it a few dozen times now, but the Bellas are not good actresses and the story isn’t working. It’s just so overdone and overexposed and the rest of the company is suffering as a result. This is the same problem that TNA often has: if you don’t like this story, don’t bother watching the show because it’s what you’re getting. Raw was basically three stories: Cena vs. Authority, Henry vs. Rusev and the Bellas with the other stuff just being there to fill in time. That doesn’t make a good three hour show and it’s really causing a lot of problems week to week.

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Smackdown – August 29, 2014: Follow The Cannon Fodder

Smackdown
Date: August 29, 2014
Location: Citizens Bank Business Arena, Ontario, California
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Tom Phillips, Michael Cole

I can’t believe I’m saying this but Smackdown might be the best thing I could sit through right now. To say Raw wasn’t that great is an understatement and WWE really doesn’t seem to be the most interesting right now. However, two hours of decent wrestling and far less nonsense might be the cure for some of their issues. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip of the eulogy from Raw, Reigns cleaning house and the match that followed.

Roman Reigns vs. Bray Wyatt

Reigns takes him into the corner to start and runs Bray over with a hard clothesline. Bray sends Reigns out to the floor and hits a big running charge to knock him off the apron. Back in and we hit the chinlock for a bit before Bray hammers on him even more. Roman comes back with right hands and the jumping clothesline but Bray elbows out of the Samoan drop. The backsplash gets two for Bray but he goes to the middle rope, allowing Roman to hit the Samoan drop for two. He loads up the apron boot but gets in a fight with the Wyatts for the DQ at 3:20.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad for the most part and WAY less annoying than what I sat through on Raw. Bray looked like he was on equal footing for the most part and wasn’t dominated during the match. It wasn’t anything special but it kept both guys looking strong and set up stuff for later. That’s the best you can ask for out of a match that isn’t even three and a half minutes.

Big Show and Mark Henry make the save, setting up a six man tag later on I’m sure.

Rob Van Dam vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins immediately stomps Van Dam down in the corner to start but runs into an elbow to the jaw. Rob’s middle rope kick drops Seth and he flips over Rollins’ back, only to walk into a dropkick. We take an early break and come back with Rollins splashing him in the corner and mocking Van Dam’s pose.

Rollins puts on the chinlock for a bit before Rob fights up and kicks him in the head. A superkick sets up Rolling Thunder but Rollins gets out of the way. The Curb Stomps misses and Rob kicks him in the face again. The Five Star misses as well and Rollins nails an enziguri for two. Seth goes up top and breaks up a superplex attempt with a running buckle bomb. There’s another buckle bomb and the Curb Stomp is enough to pin Van Dam at 4:40 shown of 8:10.

Rating: C. It’s a nice back and forth match with both guys getting to look good. Word on the street is this was Van Dam’s last match and thankfully he got to go out with a decent match. Rollins getting a decisive win is a nice touch and he looks even better before he gets to his big match with Reigns.

We look back at the Bella Twins segment from Raw and are lucky enough to see family photos to make it even more SERIOUS.

Paige vs. Emma

Non-title. Paige slaps her down to start but Emma gets in a kick to the head. She goes up top, only to get pulled down to the mat. The PTO makes Emma tap at 58 seconds.

Post match AJ comes out with a box of chocolates for Paige. AJ says that it’s because Paige is her friend and Paige said she loved her. She demands that Paige eat one and gets her wish. Paige spits it back at AJ but AJ eats it anyway. Paige is freaked out again.

Lana and Rusev come out to do their usual.

Rusev vs. Jack Swagger

Submission match. Swagger immediately goes after the ankle but he can’t suplex Rusev because of the bad ribs. With that not being an option, Swagger kicks him in the ankle and puts on the Patriot Lock, sending Rusev crawling to the ropes. They head outside with Rusev whipping Swagger into the barricade. We take a break and come back with Swagger being sent back outside but Rusev’s ankle is hurting too badly to follow up. Swagger blocks a kick and puts the Patriot Lock on outside.

Rusev crawls back inside for the break so Jack kicks at the leg in the corner. The Vader Bomb connects but the ribs are hurt even worse. Now Rusev puts Swagger in a Patriot Lock until Swagger rolls through into one of his own. The ropes save Rusev again and he nails the jumping superkick. Rusev hooks the Accolade but Jack gets an arm free and grabs a rope. The hold goes back on in the middle of the ring but Jack powers to his feet. A towel comes flying in and Bo Dallas trips up Swagger to put him back in the full hold, making Swagger tap at 7:03 shown of 10:33.

Rating: C. This is an interesting one as they keep Swagger looking as strong as they can, but having him tap defeats the purpose. It continues to set up Swagger vs. Dallas, but that doesn’t really do as much for me with Swagger submitting. Have him pass out again, or let it be a regular match ending in a pin but the tapping out hurts this. It does however keep Rusev strong and that’s more important long term.

Dallas says he threw the towel in because Swagger hasn’t learned to Bolieve. Swagger takes a Bodog for good measure.

Miz is on the phone with his agent and says he can be on set within the hour. Reigns already had a match so there won’t be a trilogy. Someone keeps tapping him on the shoulder (Miz: “Autographs will be signed LATER!”) but it’s Kane, who makes Miz vs. Sheamus for tonight. Why does Kane have it in for Miz lately?

Jimmy Uso vs. Stardust

Jey is at ringside with a taped up knee, making him I believe the fourth current wrestler with a nagging injury (Swagger, Rusev, Ambrose, Jey). Again, GET SOME NEW WRITERS. Before the match, Goldust apologizes for freaking out on Monday but the Usos don’t seem convinced. Jimmy hits a loud chop in the corner to start but Stardust hits the drop down uppercut to take over. He drives some shoulders into Jimmy’s ribs but gets rolled up for the pin at 1:02.

The Dusts go nuts and attack after the match again.

Sheamus vs. The Miz

Pause for stunt double.

Sheamus vs. Damien Mizdow

Non-title. Miz offers a distraction to give Damien an early distraction. Some knees to the chest have Sheamus in trouble but he pops up with the running ax handles. He nails the ten forearms to the chest and pulls Mizdow back in for White Noise and the pin at 1:48. Another nothing match.

Miz gets in a cheap shot post match and runs, only to have Dolph Ziggler throw him back into the ring. Sheamus tries a Brogue Kick but hits Damien instead. Nice setup for a future tag match.

Clips of Lesnar and Heyman’s pretaped interview from Raw and the Hall of Fame forum.

Wyatt Family vs. Big Show/Mark Henry/Roman Reigns

They all pair off because the bell rings with Reigns and Wyatt fighting out to the floor. We get started with Big Show and Rowan slugging it out in the ring. Big Show actually busts out a sunset flip for two before cranking on a hammerlock. Reigns comes in and drives Rowan down by the arm. It’s quickly off to Henry to stay on the arm as the big guys make some fast tags.

Big Show hits the loud chop on Rowan before allowing Harper to come in for one of his own. Harper takes another in a different corner before asking Big Show to hit him again. Big Show gives him a running basement dropkick of all things, much to Cole’s shock. Off to Henry who gets dropkicked down by Harper, allowing Bray to come in for a beatdown.

We take a break and come back with Henry countering a Rowan suplex to put Erick down. There’s the hot tag to Big Show for some clotheslines but Rowan nails him with a clothesline to take over. Harper Gator Rolls Big Show to Wyatt’s delight. Back to Bray for two off a DDT and Rowan gets the same off a splash. Erick cranks on the neck but lets Big Show up, allowing the giant to get a boot up in the corner. Harper keeps Big Show down and puts on a choke.

Big Show stands up and drops Luke down on his back, only to have Bray come in and hammer away. A huge clothesline drops Wyatt and there’s the real hot tag to Reigns. Roman cleans Harper’s house and hits the apron boot. There’s the Superman Punch for two as Rowan makes the save. Big Show takes out Rowan with a chokeslam but Bray runs Big Show down. The World’s Strongest Slam drops Bray but Harper kicks Mark in the face. Harper loads up the discus lariat but Roman nails a great looking spear for the pin at 12:17 shown of 15:17.

Rating: C. That spear really did look great and had the kind of impact that Reigns needs every time. Roman is continuing to get his strong push, but the way Bray has been treated since Summerslam doesn’t sit well with me. He’s just another heel at this point, which is really annoying considering how thin WWE is at the top of the card.

They need to build someone up instead of having him be cannon fodder for the big stars or the latest SUPER STRONG TEAM THAT WE’VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE IN THE HISTORY OF OUR SPORT THAT IS GOING TO SPLIT UP FOR A BATTLE OF THE GIANTS IN LIKE THREE MONTHS AFTER WINNING AND LOSING THE TAG TITLES! I’ll give them this though: all of these guys move amazingly well for their size.

Overall Rating: C-. This worked well enough but the short matches got on my nerves. But hey, at least we got to sit through a bunch of recaps of boring segments from Raw. The Bella segment just kills the show dead and doesn’t make for entertaining television. Well at least not entertaining for the right reasons. The show was a decent enough use of two hours and I kind of like the tag match they set up with Sheamus and Miz’s stuff. Not a bad show this week but nothing worth checking out.

Results
Roman Reigns b. Bray Wyatt via DQ when the Wyatt Family interfered
Seth Rollins b. Rob Van Dam – Curb Stomp
Paige b. Emma – PTO
Rusev b. Jack Swagger – Accolade
Jimmy Uso b. Stardust – Rollup
Sheamus b. Damien Mizdow – White Noise
Big Show/Mark Henry/Roman Reigns b. Wyatt Family – Spear to Harper

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