Main Event – March 16, 2017: Another Forgettable Show
Main Event Date: March 16, 2017
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
I’m hoping that things pick up a bit as we get closer to Wrestlemania but there’s a good chance that it’s just not going to happen. Main Event continues to be one of the most difficult to predict shows around as it seems to be the same thing, only to have a curve thrown in every so often. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Bo Dallas vs. Curtis Axel
Do you think these people get tired of facing each other in these nothing matches? Axel takes him into the corner to start but is quickly put over the top rope for the swinging neckbreaker. It’s off to a cravate until Dallas forearms him in the face for two. We go to a wide shot for some reason as Bo gets two off a clothesline. That earns him a clothesline from Curtis but the PerfectPlex is countered into a small package for two. Not that it matters as the PerfectPlex gives Curtis the pin at 4:23.
Rating: D+. Standard match between these two and that’s not the best thing in the world. You’re only going to get so much out of these guys with the same matches over and over, which is kind of the point of this show: keep them doing something to validate their employment without actually having them do anything important. I like both guys so that’s a bit frustrating but at least they’re around.
To Raw!
Here are Paul Heyman and Lesnar to open things up. Heyman can’t believe that something happened last week because Goldberg was supposed to be unstoppable. In twenty nights at Wrestlemania, Lesnar is going to prove the world wrong and destroy Goldberg in short order. Heyman teases Goldberg being here but says the champ isn’t in the arena. Every time Lesnar has run into Goldberg it’s been spear, Jackhammer, Goldberg. Last week though it was F5, Lesnar. At Wrestlemania, it’s an F5 to end the great comeback because the F5 means Goldberg goes down.
To Raw again!
Roman Reigns calls Undertaker out and we take a break. Back from a break with Reigns still in the ring and Shawn Michaels coming out. Reigns says it’s nice to see him but he wanted to see the Undertaker. Shawn says he saw Reigns get distracted by the gong and that can’t happen going into Wrestlemania. We’re twenty days from Wrestlemania and Undertaker is already in Reigns’ head. At Wrestlemania, Undertaker is going to eat Roman alive.
Reigns says that’s not happening because Undertaker needs to be wondering what it’s going to be like to be in the ring with him. Shawn says he’s in Reigns’ yard but Roman needs to get his head on straight. That’s not enough for Roman, because he remembers Undertaker retired Shawn at Wrestlemania. Come Orlando, Reigns is retiring Undertaker. Reigns goes to leave and gets run over by Braun Strowman, who earns himself a THANK YOU STROWMAN chant.
Jack Gallagher vs. Noam Dar
Gallagher quickly takes him to the mat for a leglock before they fight over arm control. The headstand in the corner confused Dar until a kick to the chest puts him on the floor. Back from a break with Dar still working on the arm until Jack easily pulls him down to the mat by the leg. The headbutt into the corner dropkick is good for the pin on Dar at 7:08.
Rating: C-. Not much here other than Gallagher being amused by Alicia Fox’s level of craziness. I’m glad that Gallagher is back to being his normal self but they need to do something with Dar. The guy is talented but the whole Fox story hasn’t done much for him. Maybe it’ll be interesting when we find out who is sending her stuff (Gallagher would be an amazing choice) but until then, there’s not much to go on.
Here’s Stephanie to introduce Foley for the firing announcement. Foley hadn’t been able to think of anyone all night but in the last ten minutes, someone’s name came to him and he knows what to do. After thanking Stephanie, he announces……Stephanie should be fired. Stephanie isn’t pleased (of course) and rips into Foley, who talks about how Stephanie lied to him six months ago when she said she had nothing to do with HHH interfering.
Foley goes on about how HHH makes an army for himself but Stephanie cuts him off mid-insult. Cue HHH to say Foley can say this to his face. Foley says that’s fine but he didn’t think HHH really existed. HHH laughs him off and they go back and forth about how Foley doesn’t need this job and HHH uses his position to abuse his power. HHH says Foley needs to leave and go around the world again telling his sad story, but if he does, his kids can forget about working for WWE.
What Foley needs to do is go backstage and have an epiphany about how much he loves his job before doing whatever Stephanie tells him to do. Foley turns to leave but stops as Stephanie rants against the people for not respecting their bosses enough. HHH goes after Foley and gets Mr. Socko for his efforts. Stephanie makes the save with a low blow and HHH unbuttons his sleeves. Cue Seth Rollins on a crutch but it’s quickly thrown to the side. Rollins comes in and hammers away but HHH grabs the crutch and hits him in the bad knee. HHH even busts out a reverse Figure Four to make Rollins scream to end the show.
Overall Rating: C-. This was your usual skippable show but as is almost always the case around here, Main Event is the easiest thing in the world to sit through. There’s no time spent on the original matches (most of which we’ve seen multiple times) so you can get the big Raw segments in a hurry, which makes for an easier time than three hours with commercials.
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Main Event – March 2, 2017: Take a Lesson From TNA
Main Event Date: March 2, 2017
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, R-Truth
It’s a month away from Wrestlemania and that means it’s time to watch some of the talent who has little chance of making it to the main shows more often than not. Raw has been up and down lately and I’m not sure why some of the bigger names from around here (work with me) hasn’t been bumped up to jobbers to the stars status on the big show. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Sin Cara vs. Bo Dallas
They trade some quick takedowns to start until Cara scores with his springboard elbow to the jaw. It’s WAY too early for the Swanton though and Cara has to settle for a running flip dive off the apron. Dallas sends him into the apron for a near countout, followed by his elevated swinging neckbreaker for two. He charges into raised boots in the corner though and the Swanton gives Cara the pin at 3:59.
Rating: D+. So much for Dallas being ready to move up to the main roster. I really don’t get how they decide the winners on this show as it really does feel like there’s no particular rhyme or reason to almost anything they do. Dallas is one of the regular big winners on this show and now he’s losing clean to Sin Cara in just a few minutes. TNA’s bad days had more consistent booking than this show.
To Raw!
Here’s Goldberg to get things going. He thanks the fans for their chants but gets straight to the point: he’s winning the title at Fastlane with his son cheering him on. This brings out Kevin Owens to say what he really thinks about Goldberg. When he got to this company, Owens promised to grab this company by the throat and show WWE what he was really about.
Then he beat John Cena in his first match, followed by beating Dean Ambrose, AJ Styles, Seth Rollins and the Big Dog himself, Roman Reigns. Now why should Goldberg be any different? Goldberg likes the speech and wants to fight right now but Owens doesn’t think Green Bay deserves to see him fight. They’ll fight on Sunday and the Goldberg chants die.
Back to Raw, which we never left!
We get a long video on the long history of HHH making Seth Rollins. They’ve been together for years but then Rollins hurt his knee which HHH referred to as dropping the ball. Rollins is injured but the question is can he get back in time.
Here’s Rollins, on crutches, for a sitdown interview with Corey Graves. He doesn’t know where he is mentally now but it seems that he’s in Chicago because we get a freaking CM PUNK chant. Thankfully it’s loudly booed and Seth can get back to the point. He’s not sure if he can continue at this point and as of right now, the doctors haven’t cleared him for Wrestlemania.
This brings out HHH and Samoa Joe with the former talking about how Rollins has no idea what he’s doing here. HHH knows Rollins isn’t going to Wrestlemania because that’s how he is. It was HHH who handed him the title and then Rollins bit the hand that feeds him. Rollins didn’t mind reaping the benefits along the way but now he’s treating HHH like this.
Seth needs to make the right decision and not come to Wrestlemania because HHH is done playing with him. If Rollins shows up there, it’s the last thing he’ll ever do in a WWE ring. HHH goes to leave but Seth cuts him off and says he’ll be in Orlando and it’s going to be the last thing HHH ever does.
Ariya Daivari vs. Gran Metalik
Daivari takes him down by the arm and we’re off to a break thirty seconds in. Back with Ariya missing a splash in the corner and getting caught with a middle rope hurricanrana. They trade some hard strikes to the face before Daivari grabs a Rainmaker of all things for two. Why is it for two? BECAUSE THE RAINMAKER IS JUST A CLOTHESLINE! Not that it matters as the Metalik Driver is good for the pin at 6:38. Not enough to rate but this was nothing too special anyway. I do like Metalik though.
And now, the grand finale.
It’s time for the contract signing with Mick Foley running the show. Strowman doesn’t think much of him and says he would have respected him back in the day when Foley was competition. Foley finally snaps and yells at Strowman, basically threatening to get physical because he’s still a legend, even if he won’t be the General Manager that much longer.
Cue Reigns to start the fight, which quickly heads into the crowd. Strowman beats on him even more until Reigns spears him through the barricade and a security guard in the process. Back in and Reigns stops to sign the contract but gets sent into the corner so hard that the top rope breaks. Strowman leaves and Reigns signs to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. If you ignore the Main Event exclusive stuff, this was a good go home show for Fastlane. Unfortunately that’s only kind of what this show is supposed to be, though I’m assuming the short second break was there for the sake of the long HHH vs. Rollins segment. This really does serve as a good recap of Raw but if you’ve already watched that show, there’s no need to ever watch Main Event.
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Main Event – February 23, 2017: Keeping Me Guessing
Main Event Date: February 23, 2017
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, R-Truth
I’m not even sure what to expect from this show anymore as it really could be anything from week to week. That’s not exactly a good thing either as the show can be an entertaining hour but at the same time it can be something so uninteresting that I don’t know how I survive every week. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Sin Cara vs. Bo Dallas
Bo takes him down to start and poses a lot, as you would expect him to do. A clothesline sets up a chinlock before Bo hammers away in the corner. That earns him a monkey flip as Cara starts his comeback, including a headstand into a headscissors out of the corner. Dallas gets sent outside for a running Swanton off the apron but he rolls through a high crossbody and grabs the tights for the pin on Cara at 4:53.
Rating: D. It’s going to be one of those weeks isn’t it? I really don’t know why Dallas isn’t on the main roster. You really can’t do something with that grin and the extra aggression that he’s been showing from time to time? It’s not like the main roster is flush with jobbers to the stars so throw him on there and let us have something fresh for a change.
We open with a long recap of the Festival of Friendship and Kevin Owens turning on Chris Jericho. Sweet popcorn baked into a pie that was an amazing segment.
Owens is sitting in the ring in the dark in a chair to get things going. When he was growing up, if anyone had told him he would be defending the World Title against Goldberg in the main event of a pay per view, he would have thought you were crazy. Of course he’d be in the main event of a pay per view, but against Goldberg? The Goldberg chants start up and Owens thinks that’s exactly what he wanted to hear.
That’s the chant that makes Goldberg think he’s invincible as they head into their match at Fastlane. At the pay per view, all Owens has to do is outlast and outsmart Goldberg because the longer a Goldberg match goes, the weaker and weaker he gets. Owens is the master of outsmarting opponents and no one knows how to play the game like him.
Goldberg can say Owens is next all he wants but as far as Owens is concerned, Goldberg is nothing. As for what happened last week with Jericho….Owens drops the mic and walks out. This is the Owens that we’ve been waiting to see on the main roster for a long time and that’s nothing but good as we head into the final stretch to Wrestlemania. Owens was great here and that’s awesome to see.
Our second Raw moment.
Cole is in the back for a sitdown interview with Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman. We get straight to the point with Goldberg but Heyman cuts Cole off and says Lesnar isn’t interested in questions like this one. Heyman says Lesnar isn’t interested in hearing about Goldberg winning the title so Lesnar scares Cole away and stares straight into the camera.
Paul talks about Owens attacking Jericho last week because Lesnar disagrees with Owens being the most violent champion in years. Lesnar isn’t interested in hearing about Owens but Heyman talks about Kevin’s greatness anyway. A lot of people want to see Owens pull it off but Lesnar disagrees because if Owens loses, it’s Goldberg vs. Lesnar for the title. That’s just one more thing for Lesnar to conquer at Wrestlemania and that’s what he wants to do.
Diamond Dallas Page Hall of Fame announcement.
TJ Perkins/Cedric Alexander vs. Noam Dar/Tony Nese
Nese throws TJ around to start so Perkins grabs a headlock instead. With that not working, a jumping spinning kick to the face puts Nese into the corner, followed by the Detonation Kick to send him outside. Back from a break with Perkins snapping Noam’s arm back but some heel double teaming takes over. Perkins fights out of a waistlock and hits a gutbuster to set up the hot tag to Cedric. Everything breaks down and a Lumbar Check ends Dar at 9:37.
Rating: C-. Still not good but at least there was some better action. You’re still only going to get so much out of these random cruiserweight tags though and that’s rather tiresome. I know Dar and Alexander were feuding a few weeks back but that hasn’t really been the case recently. I need more than just a random tag match to keep my attention and I’m not getting that here.
We’ll wrap it up here.
Braun Strowman vs. Big Show
And yes, this really is the main event. Show grabs a wristlock to start but Braun rolls around and nips up to escape. Now that’s going to get him noticed. Show shoves him down but gets punched in the jaw and dropped for his efforts. Strowman charges into a choke but easily reverses into a DDT for two. A clothesline drops Show for two and it’s all Strowman so far.
Show reverses a suplex into one of his own and grabs the chokeslam for two. The powerslam doesn’t work so Show puts him on top for the superplex. Strowman escapes that but dives into the KO Punch for two. Show loads up the Vader Bomb, only to have Strowman get up for the powerslam (doesn’t look great) for two of his own. Not that it matters as Braun hits another powerslam for the pin at 12:10.
Rating: C. Right here is a great example of a match that doesn’t need to be good to get the point across. Much like last week, this was about Strowman showing that he’s the new star instead of the old guard like Show or Mark Henry. It’s a very simple idea but they’re telling the right story, which is all you can ask for.
Post match Reigns comes out and gets in a few Superman Punches but Strowman hits the powerslam to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. This was one of the weeks where the original stuff wasn’t enough to carry the show, despite the fact that the Raw replays were much better. I still don’t get why they can’t throw in a bigger name for all of a match, even if they’re appearing on the main show that week. I know there’s a point to this show but they could at least try.
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Main Event – January 5, 2017: The New Year is Still No Saturday Night
Main Event Date: January 5, 2017
Location: Amalie Arena, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Austin Aries
I’m really curious to see if Main Event trolls us like Raw has been doing in recent weeks. I know we’ll be seeing some Roman Reigns stuff but that doesn’t mean it’s going to be any more interesting here. As usual it’s going to come down to whatever original stuff they have to offer here and that can be all over the place. Let’s get to it.
Ariya Daivari vs. Lince Dorado
So much for this week. Lince flips out of a wristlock to start and sends Ariya outside before grabbing an armbar of his own. Daivari stomps him down in the corner, only to get caught by a spinning crossbody out of the corner. It’s too early for the shooting star press though and Dorado is sent head first into the post. The Magic Carpetless Ride (frog splash) ends Dorado at 4:29.
Rating: D+. If they could find two less interesting cruiserweights, I’m really not sure I want to see them. This was a really average match that was pulled down by how dull both guys really are. Neither is interesting but for some reason they both have jobs and regularly appear on TV. I know you need jobbers but could you find someone better for TV matches?
Video on Sami Zayn vs. Braun Strowman.
To Raw for the first time.
Sami Zayn vs. Braun Strowman
Last man standing, meaning Sami is about to die. Sami gets in a jab and tries some kendo stick shots but Braun just breaks it over his leg. Another stick gets about the same treatment and the moonsault off the barricade is pulled out of the air. A few rams into the post have Strowman staggered until he punches Sami to block the diving DDT. Some clotheslines drop Sami, whose offense is shrugged off over and over again.
Back with Sami being sent off the ramp as the match goes out of the arena, meaning the fans can’t see. As you might expect, this earns some widespread booing. Sami finally sends Braun into the equipment cases so Strowman throws him on top of them. Strowman THROWS A CASE AT HIM and thankfully it doesn’t cause a bad case of death.
Sami cracks him in the back with a chair as they stagger back into the arena. That just earns Zayn a toss onto the stage, followed by a whip into the screen. Zayn chairs him again and Braun is staggered, followed by a crossbody to put Strowman through some tables for a six count but Strowman is reeling.
Sami swings again but Braun grabs the chair and drags him up onto the ramp in another scary power display. The powerslam on the floor gives Braun a seven so Strowman just unloads on him with knees to the head and right hands. Another powerslam on the floor ends Sami at 15:48.
Rating: B. I had a lot more fun with this one than I was expecting to as they gave Sami all the offense they realistically could. It’s also a good sign that Strowman is rapidly getting the hang of wrestling like a monster instead of just standing around and doing power stuff. They beat the heck out of each other here and Strowman selling yet still shrugging the offense off was done quite well.
Sami does a stretcher job but Strowman turns it over.
Back to Raw again.
US Title: Roman Reigns vs. Chris Jericho
Owens is banned from ringside, Reigns is defending and loses the title if he gets counted out or disqualified. The champ runs Jericho over to start as the fans are split on Reigns. A middle rope dropkick gets two for Jericho so Reigns comes back with his string of clotheslines. Reigns tries the apron dropkick but crashes into the post instead, giving Jericho a near countout as we take a break.
Back with Reigns fighting out of a chinlock and hitting his modified belly to back suplex for two. The Superman Punch is blocked but the Lionsault hits knees. The other finishers are broken up until Jericho grabs the Walls. That lasts as long as you would expect the Walls to last until Jericho goes up top again, only to dive into the Superman Punch for a near fall.
Another spear is broken up and Jericho takes off a turnbuckle pad. That sets up the old Eddie Guerrero grab the belt and pretend to get hit with it spot. The referee doesn’t buy it so instead the Codebreaker gets two. Jericho goes into the exposed buckle and the spear retains the title at 13:06.
Rating: C+. The ending actually deflated me and that’s not a good thing about the top face on a show. There’s just no reason for Reigns to keep the title at this point and everyone has to know it at this point. He’s not helping the title and he doesn’t gain anything by holding it so why keep doing it this way? I mean, other than as a middle finger to the fans who want ANYONE else to hold the title.
Bo Dallas/Darren Young vs. Shining Stars
Epico and Young hit the mat to start before it’s already off to Primo, who walks into a string of slams. A fired up Dallas runs Primo over on the floor and we take a break. Back with Dallas screaming at us to believe in him, allowing the cousins to take over. We get what sounds like a JOBBERS chant as Primo starts in on the arm. A slingshot legdrop sets up another armbar as Aries suggests a thumb to the eye. Dallas collides with Primo and winds up on the floor as everything breaks down. Primo grabs a rollup on Young and pulls the trunks for the pin at 10:12.
Rating: D. I liked Dallas’ fire but then again I like almost anything he does out there. The Shining Stars are starting to remind me of Lance Storm: they might be technically sound but that doesn’t mean I have any interest in watching what they’re doing. Young continues to be a warm body and that’s why he’s still on Main Event.
One more Raw segment to wrap us up.
It’s time for the Kevin Owens Show with a lawn chair, a table and a man standing in place with a sign over his face. Owens introduces Jericho as his first guest and he’s not happy. See, the fans were chanting for Goldberg just a few minutes ago and that means TAMPA JUST MADE THE LIST.
Jericho has breaking news: he’s the third (sixth) entrant in the Royal Rumble! Owens isn’t pleased but Jericho says no matter what happens, they’re still the champ. Kevin still doesn’t want to do it but he gets cut off by Goldberg’s full entrance. Goldberg throws the chair out of the ring and Jericho isn’t impressed. Jericho: “You know what happens when you destroy the set?” Goldberg: “YEAH! Spear, Jackhammer.”
Owens throws out the rest of the set and the brawl is teased until Paul Heyman breaks it up. He says the Rumble will be elimination, repeat, elimination, repeat but Roman Reigns interrupts as well. That brings Reigns to Lesnar but now it’s Braun coming out to take the mic from a cowering Heyman. Owens and Jericho bail to the floor and Strowman is in the Rumble too. A double spear drops Strowman and posing ends the show.
Overall Rating: D. What exactly were you expecting out of this one? The show was another slog through the disaster that Raw has become with some very lame original matches to go with it. I really wasn’t feeling this one and I have no idea why I’d want to keep watching this show if it wasn’t so quick with all the recaps.
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Main Event Date: December 9, 2016
Location: Frank Erwin Center, Austin, Texas
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
We’ve had a steady schedule for all of a week now so of course it’s time to change again. This show is now being released on Fridays on Hulu and will be available online a day or so later. If nothing else it’s kind of nice to wait a little bit instead of having the show airing just a day or two after Smackdown. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Darren Young vs. Jinder Mahal
…..no. No no, no no no. NO! How many times can they possibly do THIS SAME MATCH??? Young wristlocks him down to start and we hit the mat with a headlock takeover. Jinder goes after the knee to take over but some cannonballs down onto the leg only get him kicked out to the floor. The Gut Check is broken up but a second attempt is enough to put Mahal away at 5:00.
Rating: D+. Just a simple match but the repetitive nature is just killing the thing. I have no idea who is loving these matches so much but I really question their taste in wrestling. Just find something new already because, even though not a lot of people are watching, these shows have an audience and they deserve a bit more respect.
Back to Raw.
It’s time for the big ending with Charlotte (who has accepted the Iron Man challenge) apologizing to her dad. We see her yelling at Flair (that makes three times tonight) but it was even harder to see Flair raise Sasha’s hand last week. Charlotte says no one can imagine how hard it is to be Ric’s daughter because of how big his legacy really is.
Then last week she saw her dad raise Sasha’s hand and she knew she had failed as his daughter. Flair comes out and hugs her but, of course (that’s a trend tonight) she slaps him in the face. Cue Sasha but Charlotte Alley Oops her face first into the post. Charlotte mocks Flair crying and walks away to end the show.
From Raw again.
Anderson and Gallows vs. Cesaro/Sheamus
The winners get New Day, at ringside here, next week for the titles. Anderson and Gallows go outside and get in New Day’s face to start but the Europeans run them over, sending the cereal flying. Back from a break with Cesaro fighting out of Anderson’s chinlock and escaping the Magic Killer with some help from Sheamus. The hot tag brings Sheamus in for the ten forearms to the chest but everyone winds up on the floor for the brawl with New Day and that’s a no contest at 9:58.
Rating: C. This was fine though the triple threat for next week was obvious. I’m really not sure who wins the thing but it’s a cool feeling to have a match where I don’t know the ending. The match should be fun and I really could see it going either way. This match was just a means to an end and that’s fine.
Bo Dallas vs. Sin Cara
Another rematch. Cara starts fast by knocking him outside for a suicide dive. Back in and Bo runs the masked one over and implores that we Bo-lieve in him. Cara’s moonsault seems to hit knees and he sends Bo into the ropes while trying to throw Dallas outside. We take a break and come back with Cara failing to suplex Bo out to the floor.
Dallas’ belly to back suplex does work but Cara throws him into the ropes for another crash. A Lionsault press gets two for Cara and a middle rope Regal Roll gets the same. Cara fires off some knees until the referee pulls him away, allowing Bo to grab a rollup (and maybe some tights) for the pin at 10:40.
Rating: C+. This was much better than I was expecting with both guys actually working a lot harder than you would have guessed. Dallas has a place on the roster but he needs the right character to really pull it off. I mean, he’s beating a main roster guy here but that doesn’t count because Cara is just a lowly cruiserweight and therefore meant to be beaten right?
Back to Raw one last time to wrap things up.
US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Roman Reigns
Roman is defending and is actually driven into the corner to start. The Superman Punch is countered with a dropkick and a clothesline puts the champ on the floor. A big dive to the floor takes Reigns out again and we take a break. Back with Reigns caught in a chinlock for a bit before being tossed out to the floor.
The Lionsault only gets two and the fans are getting WAY into Jericho all over again. A Samoan drop and Superman Punch get two on Jericho and the Codebreaker is countered into a sitout powerbomb. Roman goes shoulder first into the post though and we hit the Walls. As Reigns grabs the rope, cue Owens for a superkick. The Codebreaker gets two on Reigns but the Canadian argument sets up the spear to retain the title at 13:43.
Rating: B. Is there a reason why Reigns needs the US Title? Someone answer that for me. His feud is over the World Title and he doesn’t have a long term challenger but he’s still US Champion with no real prospects for a title feud anytime soon. Jericho vs. Rollins over the US Title could elevate the belt but Reigns is keeping it anyway. I don’t think I need to explain this one being good as Jericho is still on fire.
Overall Rating: C-. Just a show here really and that’s mainly due to how stale Raw feels at the moment. With almost nothing interesting going on Monday nights, it’s kind of hard to get into a recap show with a decent featured match. I’m already missing the old Main Event format and again, that’s just because Raw’s roster isn’t as interesting or entertaining.
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Main Event – November 29, 2016: Even The Benches Are Better
Main Event Date: November 29, 2016
Location: Spectrum Center, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
I’m not sure what to expect this week as we’re officially taped on Mondays now with Superstars being added to the canceled list. Last week’s show was a lot of fun with a big focus on past moments but I have a feeling this is going to be back to the standard. Thankfully that’s hardly a bad thing so let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Sin Cara vs. Bo Dallas
Feeling out process to start with something like a springboard armdrag sending Bo outside for a breather. A running hip attack staggers Cara though and it’s off to a chinlock. Cara comes back with a springboard crossbody and a standing Lionsault for two. The swanton misses though and a Roll of the Dice puts Cara away at 4:32.
Rating: D. So Cara keeps getting pushed on Raw (at least making appearances) while Dallas keeps winning over on Main Event and can’t even get a cameo on Raw? Remember a few weeks ago when he was winning a few matches on the big show? Apparently WWE doesn’t either and just put him on this show for reasons that aren’t clear.
Back to Monday for something that hadn’t happened when this was taped.
We get a sitdown interview with Paul Heyman, who says he and Brock Lesnar screwed up by underestimating Goldberg. After twelve years on the sidelines, Goldberg stepped into the ring and cracked Lesnar’s ribs with a spear. This is now part of Lesnar’s legacy and it’s an embarrassment. The loss makes Lesnar think he has something to prove, which really scares Heyman, who doesn’t know what it’s going to turn Lesnar into. If Goldberg is in the Royal Rumble, so is Brock, which means there will be one conqueror, 28 losers, and one victim.
Also from Raw, we get a montage of Seth Rollins beating up Chris Jericho and Roman Reigns beating Kevin Owens, earning himself a title shot at Roadblock in December.
Darren Young/Curtis Axel vs. Shining Stars
Curtis and Epico get things going before it’s off to Darren for a wristlock. You can hear the nearly stoic silence as Young works a headlock on the mat. An atomic drop sends Epico outside and a double clothesline does the same thing to Primo. Back from a break with Epico finally going for the throat to take over but the threat of a Backlund sends Epico running into a rollup.
Young gets beaten down in the wrong corner with Primo breaking up a comeback attempt. A belly to belly suplex is enough for the hot tag off to Curtis for the house cleaning. Axel suplexes Primo but Epico plays Bobby Heenan for the Ultimate Warrior/Rick Rude finish to put Curtis away at 11:25.
Rating: D+. Just a tag match here as Backlund continues to be the most interesting thing one out of the whole group. There’s a reason these guys are over on Main Event instead of getting time on the main show. Axel has potential but LOSING EVERY SINGLE WEEK isn’t exactly doing him any favors.
One more Raw clip to take us home.
Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks
Charlotte is defending and this is anything goes with falls counting anywhere. Sasha starts fast by knocking the champ outside and scoring with a suicide dive. A double clothesline puts both women down as we take a break. Back with Sasha fighting out of a bodyscissors and kneeing Charlotte in the face.
The double knees in the corner miss though and a big boot knocks Sasha off the apron for two on the floor. Natural Selection on the floor gets the same and the champ is annoyed. The annoyance takes so long that Sasha pulls out a kendo stick and swings away, drawing the ECW chants. Charlotte knocks her down again and grabs the Figure Eight, only to have a stick shot break it up.
They fight towards the announcers’ table where Charlotte moonsaults onto Sasha….or at least a few feet to Sasha’s right, for a near fall. Sasha gets in a Thesz press off the barricade for two more and both of them are down. They head into the crowd and Sasha ties her up in a handrail, setting up the Bank Statement to make Charlotte tap at 16:28.
Rating: B. I’m not sure how many more times I can put this the same way: the match was good, Charlotte missed the big spot, and Sasha gets the title back. She’s held the title twice before with both reigns lasting twenty seven days. It’s really hard to care again when we’ve seen this multiple times and it’s ended in less than a month both times. Still though, good stuff.
Ric Flair comes out, raises Sasha’s hand, and is gone in less than thirty seconds. Banks celebrates to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. Dang it they’ve ruined Main Event. I’m running out of ways to say that Smackdown is the better show but now even their benches are beating Raw. The original wrestling here was horrible but at least Charlotte vs. Sasha was fun to see again. Thanks for taking away some of the fun I was having WWE. I’m sure it was worth it for the sake of Darren Young and Bo Dallas.
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Superstars – November 25, 2016: Is It So Much To Ask?
Superstars Date: November 25, 2016
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves
We’re past Survivor Series and that could mean some changes for WWE and Superstars in particular. You never know what you’re going to get on here, and by that I mean you never know what you’re going to get to go with Jinder Mahal vs. Darren Young. Those two are destined to fight for all eternity it seems so let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Sin Cara vs. Jinder Mahal
The fans seem confused as to why Mahal is here and I can’t say I disagree. Feeling out process to start with Cara’s backdrop drawing a smattering of applause. Mahal gets in a shot of his own and does that stupid peace pose. A kneedrop sets up the required chinlock and there’s that peace pose again because that’s Mahal’s entire character, if you can call it that. Mahal gets dropkicked out of the air and Cara’s Swanton Bomb is enough for the pin at 5:02.
Rating: D-. I know I’ve made this comparison time after time but it’s really annoying to see the difference between Superstars and Main Event. Every week it feels like Superstars is just having a match because they have to while Main Event comes off like they’re at least trying. It helps so much and can actually be entertaining. Why be boring when you don’t have to be?
Video on Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar.
From Monday.
Here’s Goldberg getting the full entrance to open things up. Goldberg thanks the fans for letting him be Goldberg again. He also thanks his wife and son for putting up with him and he got to be a star again one more time. Last night he ran into Stephanie McMahon who said he did have one more spear and Jackhammer in him (three spears and two Jackhammers if you’re counting) but the question is does he have one more title run left in him. The fans go NUTS over that prospect and Goldberg says he’s in the Royal Rumble.
And from Monday again.
Raw Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Sheamus/Cesaro
New Day is defending and talk about breaking Demolition’s record for longest Tag Team Title reign in just 23 days. A powerslam gives Cesaro two on Big E. to start but Kofi escapes an early Swing attempt. Instead Cesaro sends him into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Kofi dropkicking Sheamus out of the air but getting Irish Cursed for two.
Sheamus won’t tag out though and we get some heel (I think?) miscommunication with Cesaro being knocked off the apron. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house as everything breaks down. The Warrior Splash gets two on Sheamus but he rakes Big E.’s eyes to set up White Noise for the same.
It’s back to Cesaro vs. Kofi with the Uppercut Train taking off, only to have an SOS get two. Trouble in Paradise is countered into a Cesaro Swing which goes into the Sharpshooter. The Brogue Kick puts Big E. down but Woods gets on the apron for the distraction as Kofi taps. Ever the moron, Cesaro lets the hold go and gets small packaged for the pin at 12:18.
Rating: C+. So they seem to be turning New Day heel. I think I can actually go with that as I’d much rather go there than have Cesaro and Sheamus stop them just before the record. Obviously they haven’t gotten there yet and there’s always the possibility that they’ll switch the titles with two days to go, but at least they didn’t do it here.
Bo Dallas vs. Curtis Axel
We actually get a video showing their breakup from last month. Dallas goes after the knee to start and we hit an early cravate. Back up and a few clotheslines set up a Hennig necksnap on Bo as we go to a break. We come back with the Axehole getting two on Bo as this just keeps going. Dallas blocks a suplex to the floor and hits an elevated Final Cut of all things for two. The PerfectPlex gives Curtis the same but he can’t grab a super PerfectPlex. Axel settles for a neckbreaker out of the corner, only to walk into the Roll of the Dice for the pin at 11:54.
Rating: D. This just KEPT GOING with Axel hitting and trying everything he had and getting shut down every time. I really don’t know why Dallas is getting such a strong push but it’s getting annoying to see Axel lose every single time. This show really didn’t do much for Superstars’ reputation though as it was boring to start and never got any better.
We’ll wrap it up with Raw’s main event.
Raw World Title: Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins
Owens is defending and there are no disqualifications with Jericho and Reigns barred from ringside. Kevin tries to bail to the floor and gets kicked in the face for his efforts. The springboard knee to the head gets two inside thirty seconds so it’s already table time. Owens grabs the package piledriver slam and we take an early break.
Back with Owens in full control and hammering Seth in the head. A Sling Blade and suicide dive take Owens out, leading to another commercial. Back again with an exchange of strikes to the face putting both guys down. The frog splash misses Owens and it’s a Cannonball into a chair onto Rollins for a close two. Owens sets up a pair of chairs for a powerbomb and you can see the backdrop counter coming before it happens.
Another table is set up in the corner and the Buckle Bomb drives Owens through it for a very close two. They fight into the crowd with Rollins getting the better of it by throwing a trashcan at the champ. Owens tries the powerbomb but Seth grabs the balcony wall and pulls himself up for a big dive. They make it back to ringside but a masked man shoves Rollins off the barricade. Of course it’s Jericho and of course he gets a Pedigree on the floor. The Apron Powerbomb wipes Rollins out though and Owens throws him back in to retain at 23:07.
Rating: B+. Really good stuff here as it felt like a full on pay per view main event with high spots and near falls. The Jericho interference was a stretch and I’m kind of hoping it isn’t used to set up another rematch at Roadblock as I’m pretty much over Rollins vs. Owens after this one. Really good main event though and I bought Rollins as a title threat.
Overall Rating: D. Sweet goodness this show doesn’t make it easy. Well ok so I’d never call this difficult to sit through but they make no secret about the fact that the original matches are just there for the sake of requiring original matches. They don’t seem to even be trying out there and it gets really annoying to sit through week after week. Mix up the lineup or put in some kind of effort. That’s not too much to ask.
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Superstars – November 11, 2016: There’s No Way Around It
Superstars Date: November 11, 2016
Location: SSE Hydro, Glasgow, Scotland
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves
Maybe the European version will be more entertaining. If nothing else it should be interesting to see how this week’s Raw looks chopped up into a much shorter version. At this point it’s not like it’s going to be any worse as I really didn’t care for the full edition with the same idea three times in a row. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Neville vs. Titus O’Neil
It wasn’t any good two weeks ago and odds are it’s not going to change here. Neville moonsaults over him to start and scores with a running flip dive out to the floor. Back in and Titus goes back to the really basic power offense (anything else would be too complicated) with the triple backbreakers. Titus: “CHEER FOR HIM NOW!” Ok so he can insult a crowd fairly well. We hit the chinlock (Titus: “I’m firmly in control!”) before another backbreaker has Neville in trouble. Back up and Titus charges into a boot in the corner, setting up a Red Arrow for the pin at 4:57.
Rating: D. I actually liked Titus’ talking here but they weren’t hiding the fact that Neville was all flips. These two just do not have chemistry together but that might be due to Titus not being very good. Granted it doesn’t help that Neville doesn’t have much to his arsenal aside from the same stuff he’s done for years.
From Raw, here’s the video on Goldberg vs. Lesnar from the former’s perspective. Still good stuff.
And now, the Lesnar version.
Emmalina video.
Bo Dallas vs. Darren Young
This isn’t exactly a surprise during election week. There’s no Backlund in Young’s corner, mean there’s no one to yell at Bo as he bails to the floor early on. A headlock doesn’t get Bo very far so Young takes him to the ground for an armbar. It’s too early for a crossface chickenwing though and we take a break. Back with Darren being sent into the barricade for nothing close to a countout. We hit back to back chinlocks for a bit before Young’s comeback goes nowhere. The Roll of the Dice finishes Darren at 10:08.
Rating: D. What do you want me to say here? Darren Young is one of the least interesting wrestlers I’ve ever sat through. His ring work is passable enough but there’s no charisma or connection to him. Above all else, this is more proof that once Backlund is gone, Young likely won’t be far behind him.
We go back to Raw for our first full clip.
Here’s Stephanie McMahon to a chorus of boos. She talks about how big the battle between Monday Night Raw and Smackdown Live is going to be before introducing the four competitors for the main Survivor Series match. Kevin Owens, Chris Jericho, Roman Reigns and Braun Strowman will be joined by…..Seth Rollins in not that much of a surprise. Owens doesn’t care for Rollins being on the team but Stephanie cuts him off to go through Smackdown’s team. Raw better fight like their jobs are on the line because they are.
Stephanie leaves and Owens and Jericho talk about how they’ve taken over the show in recent weeks. Kevin thinks they need winners on the team, unlike the Shield who died because the members were all horrible human beings. The brawl is on with Braun standing behind until he cleans house. Strowman and Reigns have a staredown but here’s Stephanie again to make a five way match for later tonight.
And then, Monday’s main event.
Braun Strowman vs. Seth Rollins vs. Roman Reigns vs. Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho
Stephanie: “Now you all are going into the biggest match of your lives and it’s so important for Raw to win. NOW GO OUT THERE AND BEAT THE HECK OUT OF EACH OTHER FOR MY AMUSEMENT!!!” Non-title, nothing on the line and Reigns comes out last. Rollins, Owens and Jericho go outside so we get Reigns staring at Strowman for a long time. Strowman is knocked to the floor where Rollins beats on him with a kendo stick. Now it’s a table but Strowman makes a quick save to take us to a break.
Back with Strowman giving Reigns the reverse chokeslam and kicking Jericho out of the air. Owens tries to talk his way out of trouble before punching Strowman in the face, earning himself a clothesline. Everyone goes after Strowman and an enziguri from Rollins into the Superman Punch is finally enough to send him outside. The Sling Blade drops Owens and it’s time for the Shield showdown.
That goes nowhere as Strowman has to be dealt with again, only to have the Canadians break up the TripleBomb through the table. Strowman is put on the table and it’s Jericho being powerbombed through Braun through the table. Back in and Rollins kicks Owens in the head for two, followed by the Pedigree for the same with Jericho making the save. That earns Chris a Pedigree but Owens makes a save. Reigns Superman Punches Owens…..right into the pin on Jericho at 14:58.
Rating: C+. This was fine, although I’m really not sure what this changes. The World Champion winning a match has become a big surprise because he loses way too often anymore. At least the right guy won and this isn’t being used to set up the new challenge. I’m still not sure why Stephanie would want to make that match but who am I to question her?
Overall Rating: D. No amount of cutting it up can hide the fact that Monday’s show sucked. WWE can claim whatever they want but they put on a bad show and there’s no way around it. The regular stuff here was a big waste of time as Young is boring and Neville has to work WAY down so Titus can keep up with him. Totally worthless show here and that’s not normal for Superstars.
Monday Night Raw – October 24, 2016: Who Needs Sunday and a Cell?
Monday Night Raw Date: October 24, 2016
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves
The Beast is back tonight as Brock Lesnar is here for his first comments about his upcoming match with Goldberg. In addition to that we have two big matches including Sheamus and Cesaro vs. New Day in a non-title match and Chris Jericho vs. Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens in a triple threat. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here’s Jericho to open things up with some terrible news: tonight’s triple threat match has been canceled until further notice. The fans aren’t happy with that one but Jericho says it’s because SOMEONE HAS STOLEN THE LIST OF JERICHO. Fans: “NO! NO! NO!” Jericho isn’t leaving until the List is returned but here’s Owens to interrupt. Owens doesn’t care who has the List but he’ll help Jericho find it once they get rid of Rollins.
Jericho says there’s no triple threat match tonight but here’s Stephanie McMahon to interrupt. She explains the idea of the triple threat (because Stephanie thinks all fans are idiots) and here’s Rollins with the List. Jericho freaks out and Stephanie goes all screechy to say give it back.
Seth sees Stephanie mentioned as a stupid idiot but at the very bottom is Jericho’s former best friend, Kevin Owens. Rollins wants to start a new list about Owens, who has no idea how it is inside the Cell. He’ll also kick Owens’ teeth down his throat and break his face with a Pedigree so he can teach HHH and Stephanie a lesson (because that’s what really matters in this whole thing).
This segment showed how horribly uninteresting this whole thing is when Jericho isn’t talking. Owens barely got to say anything and Rollins wants to win the title to show up HHH and Stephanie. Some main event feud. Also, did Stephanie need to be here? Like at all? She came out, told Jericho to do the main event (which Owens had already done) and was insulted that she was on the list (like Owens a few seconds later).
Post break Stephanie tells Rollins to give the List back because the fans were promised a triple threat. Rollins vents about Stephanie’s real intentions and says the List is in the locker room.
Enzo Amore vs. Karl Anderson
Anderson and Gallows have cut off Enzo’s mic so he and the crowd do it with pure vocal power. Enzo fires off rights and lefts in the corner but dives into a spinebuster as we take an early break. Back with Enzo getting kicked in the face but stopping a charge in the corner. A rollup is broken up but Cass kicks Karl in the face to give Enzo the pin at 7:39.
Rating: D+. I almost had this whole match written from the opening bell because this was exactly what you would have expected these two to do. It’s fine to set up the tag match and thank goodness we didn’t hear any of Anderson and Gallows trying to be funny. Enzo and Cass need to win on Sunday as it’s not like Anderson and Gallows can go much further into the hole.
Rusev says he slept like a baby last night because he gets his hands on Roman Reigns inside the Cell this Sunday. Reigns has done a lot of horrible things but now it’s Rusev’s chance to crush him for good. Simple and to the point here, as it should be.
New Day vs. Cesaro/Sheamus
Non-title. Before the match, New Day praises Cesaro but says Sheamus shames us because no one wants to see him. Woods is the odd man out here, which is kind of surprising as they’re normally defending the titles. Cesaro’s backbreaker gets two on Kofi and a double back elbows shows that Cesaro and Sheamus can actually work together. New Day quickly gets it together and takes Sheamus into the corner for the Unicorn Stampede.
Back from a break with Kofi in trouble and taking the ten forearms to the chest. Cesaro misses a charge into the post and the hot tag brings in Big E. to deal with Sheamus. The Irish Curse gets two on Big E. and Cesaro’s vertical suplex gets the same. The Midnight Hour is broken up but Kofi is launched straight into the uppercut. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Big E. for the pin at 11:45.
Rating: C+. Let’s see. Yeah I’m checking here. Maybe….almost….nah I still don’t care about Sheamus and Cesaro. They’re still the same uninteresting pair that have been around since before Summerslam and still are little more than a rehash of the League of Nations having problems against New Day back in the spring. New Day needs to roll over them and give us the record in December. If you just have to give these two the belts after that then so be it but don’t mess with the year plus run for this stupid idea.
We look back at Goldberg’s return.
Jericho frantically looks for the List but runs into Titus O’Neil, the Shining Stars and Jinder Mahal, all of whom have something for him other than the List (Titus Brand, travel brochures and a breathing exercise).
Bayley vs. Dana Brooke
Bayley has a taped up shoulder after last week. Dana says not so fast because she doesn’t like the idea of last week’s win being called an upset. Tonight there’s going to be another match but this time it’s arm wrestling. Dana easily wins so Bayley offers to go left handed. Bayley starts to win and of course Dana decks her and turns the table over for the beatdown. A Bayley to Belly sends Dana running and thankfully cuts off the BORING chants. Can you blame the fans for not being impressed here?
Jericho is freaking out over the List when he runs into Stephanie, who isn’t interested in helping him. Stephanie lists off everything she has going on and says Jericho is in the match, List or not. Chris says no List and no match, ya dig? That’s not cool with the boss, who says Jericho wrestles or gets suspended.
Curtis Axel vs. Bo Dallas
Before the match, Axel does a really good speech about his Minnesota roots and being Curt Hennig’s son. Bo starts fast but the Roll of the Dice is countered into a PerfectPlex for two. I bought that for a second. A running forearm drops Curtis and we hit the chinlock. Axel fights out and hits the running neck snap for two and that’s it for his offense as Dallas grabs a rollup for the pin at 2:58. I’ve said Axel should be pushed as a face for years and this was more evidence that I’m right. It’s also more evidence that WWE gets way too much pleasure out of having people lose in their hometown.
Video on Rich Swann.
Jericho is about to leave when a guy comes up to say he saw the List. Chris finds…..Braun Strowman looking at it and asks for it back. Braun: “Say please.” Strowman doesn’t see Sami Zayn’s name on the List but gives it back anyway. Jericho says it’s on page four and since Braun touched his personal property, HE JUST MADE THE LIST!
Roman Reigns talks about being in the Cell, which Rusev hasn’t experienced. Reigns takes this personally and is ready to do anything to keep the title on Sunday.
We run down the card for Sunday’s show.
Golden Truth vs. Shining Stars
Mark Henry is with Golden Truth and Titus is with the Stars, which makes me feel a bit better about their earlier segment. It’s really nice to have them actually have a reason to be in the back instead of just showing up for a cameo. I love little things like that. Corey is reading a brochure as the Stars come out to the ring as he needs to get his mom a birthday gift.
Primo is dropped by Goldust to start but some double teaming puts him down. The snap powerslam puts Epico down and everything breaks down with Titus low bridging Truth to the floor. Henry shoves Titus into the ropes to crotch Epico, setting up a flapjack into Little Jimmy for the pin at 4:02.
Rating: D. Can someone take this show behind the barn and shoot it already? I’ll actually give this match a little credit: they’re trying to build something out of nothing and it could be a lot worse. I mean, there’s at least something there and a moderate attempt to be interesting. It’s not really working and the match feels like a nacho break but I’ll take what I can get.
Mick Foley is in the ring for the contract signing between Sasha Banks and Charlotte. They talk about how big of a moment this is going to be, only to have Foley go into his annual rant about how evil the Cell is. Charlotte calls Sasha an entitled second rate talent who will learn respect from the Queen this Sunday. Sasha is ready to crawl up the ramp broken and bloodied as long as she has the Women’s Title. They trade insults but Foley cuts them both off to say he’s their future. Dude if the Cell is going to turn them into 6’4 men with long beards, maybe we should cancel the match.
As expected, the fans chant for Foley, thereby completely missing the point of this segment. Foley met Charlotte as a child and his kids gave Sasha their signed photo of Eddie Guerrero. More insults and a double signing FINALLY wrap this up. Charlotte vs. Sasha in a major gimmick match is fine but no one, like NO ONE, buys that the match is going to be all violent and career threatening like Foley is pushing and that kills the idea.
Emmalina video.
Brian Kendrick vs. Rich Swann
TJ Perkins is on commentary. As Kendrick makes his entrance, we see clips of his run from seven to ten years ago. It’s very sad that the #1 contender to a title doesn’t even have enough video from his current run for a highlight reel. In case you didn’t know, Perkins runs down his history with Kendrick (Brian was his mentor) for the millionth or so time.
Swann flips over Brian and hits a good looking dropkick. A spinning dive to the floor takes Kendrick down and we head to a break. Back with Swann fighting out of a chinlock and snapping off a top rope hurricanrana. What looks like a victory roll is broken up but Swann slips out of the Captain’s Hook and grabs a cradle for the pin at 9:14.
Rating: C. So Swann, who looked a lot better here, pins the #1 contender for a title that has no heat going into a pay per view title match. I get that Swann is likely the next challenger but they’re ruining this division more week by week. I’ll spare you another list of problems and just say Swann looked good here and go on.
Owens promises violence on Sunday but he’s the only one coming back.
Braun Strowman vs. Sami Zayn
This has the potential to be good so let’s see how they can screw it up. Before the bell, Strowman says he wants competition but he doesn’t see that in front of him. Strowman shoves him away but Sami low bridges him to the floor. This goes badly for Sami as he dives at Braun, only to get thrown into the barricade. Strowman walks away and there’s no match.
Kendrick comes in to see Perkins and says the clock is ticking on his career. If TJ loses on Sunday, he’ll bounce back. If Brian loses, that’s it for feeding his family. TJ walks away.
Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman with something to say. Heyman does his usual schtick about how Lesnar will smash Goldberg, only to have the Goldberg chants cut him off. Heyman calls out the fan that started them and says they’re getting on Brock’s nerves. After their match, all of the chants in the world won’t be able to put Goldberg back together again. Suplexes are promised and the fans go back and forth with SUPLEX CITY/GOLDBERG chants. Heyman rips on them and the chant turns into GOLDBERG SUCKS…..to wrap this up. Ok then. There was NOTHING here and it didn’t need Brock at all.
Owens and Jericho have a meeting before the triple threat with Chris asking if their friendship means as much as the title. Kevin smiles it off and doesn’t really answer. Jericho says they’ll still be best friends no matter what but Kevin looks concerned.
Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens
Non-title. They play keep away to start until Owens gets kicked out to the floor. A Blockbuster gets two on Jericho but Owens pulls Seth outside. The champ is sent into the barricade but Jericho throws Seth into the crowd. Back in and Owens scores with a clothesline, only to have Rollins avoid the Cannonball. The Pedigree doesn’t work on either Canadian but the Lionsault hits Seth’s knees.
Owens saves his buddy from a Pedigree and it’s time for the double teaming. The handicap portion continues until Owens is low bridged to the floor. Jericho eats the low superkick and Rollins dives onto Kevin. Seth misses the frog splash and eats a Codebreaker for two. Owens comes back in and slaps Rollins a lot as the STUPID IDIOT chants kick in. Rollins escapes a double superplex and pins both guys at the same time with a double rollup at 10:00.
Rating: C+. The match was fun but it’s WAY too late in the night to really matter. Rollins pinning the champ is appropriate as Owens has been a huge afterthought in this entire story. That also makes four straight times that Rollins has pinned Jericho so you certainly can’t say he’s getting too many wins.
Post match Owens and Jericho destroy Rollins by sending him hard into the steps. We’re still not done though as Rollins runs up the ramp and dives at Owens, only to get beaten down again. Owens gives him the Apron Bomb and walks back up the ramp to get his title so some posing can end the show.
Overall Rating: D-. What a dog of a show this was. There was no effort here and their best idea was to say “Raw Exclusive Pay Per View” over and over as many times as they could. This was every lame idea they could come up with in three hours with almost no one really trying and the show feeling even longer than usual. The worst part is the show wasn’t even the worst. What it was was lacking energy and that’s as bad as it’s going to get. Horrible stuff here and little more than making me want to get to Survivor Series instead of caring about Sunday.
Results
Enzo Amore b. Karl Anderson – Rollup
Cesaro and Sheamus b. New Day – Brogue Kick to Big E.
Bo Dallas b. Curtis Axel – Rollup
Golden Truth b. Shining Stars – Flapjack into Little Jimmy to Epico
Rich Swann b. Brian Kendrick – Oklahoma Roll
Seth Rollins b. Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho – Double rollup
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Monday Night Raw – September 5, 2016: A Labor Of Boredom
Monday Night Raw Date: September 5, 2016
Location: Sprint Center Arena, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
We’re in the Kevin Owens Era but the questions remain focused on HHH, who helped Owens win the title last week while also costing Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns at the same time. This almost has to set up a big match in the very near future though it’s really not clear gets to fight whom. Let’s get to it.
The opening video looks at the last five minutes of Raw and focuses on the big online reaction.
Earlier today Stephanie McMahon demanded a big celebration for Owens. Mick Foley came up and looked really upset. Last week, HHH made him look like a fool and Stephanie won’t talk to him about it. Stephanie gets all serious when Foley accuses her of knowing what HHH was going to do. Stephanie: “Who do you think you’re talking to?” Oh here we go.
Foley actually cuts her off and tells a story about meeting Stephanie just after he flew off the Cell in 1998 and thought she was an innocent girl. Stephanie almost sounds vulnerable as she asks how she can maintain a shred of dignity after what happened last week. Mick believes her but gives a thinly veiled threat if this is all a lie.
Opening sequence.
Mick and Stephanie are in the ring and welcome Owens (in a SUIT) as the balloons fall and pyro goes off. Owens agrees that he does deserve this before ripping into the fans for making it all about themselves with the YOU DESERVE IT chants. He’s known that since the day he set foot in this ring and doesn’t need the fans to tell him that all over again. Last week he beat three superstars to win this title and yeah he got a little nudge from HHH.
Owens had already done 98% of the work though so tonight it’s officially the Kevin Owens Show. This brings out a ticked off Rollins to say this isn’t about Owens. Instead he goes off on Stephanie for letting him down last week. Owens says this isn’t about Seth but Rollins keeps going on his rampage and says everyone is in Stephanie’s pocket. Kevin has been HHH’s chosen one since the day he debuted in NXT but Seth is here to burn the whole thing to the ground.
Owens thinks Rollins has only been making plans for failures so Seth punches him in the face. Stephanie suspends Seth indefinitely but Foley immediately overturns it, drawing him one of the loudest pops he’s gotten in years. Instead of suspending him, Foley gives Seth (Foley to Seth: “I’ve never really liked you.”) the title match at Clash of the Champions.
This was good stuff for the most part, assuming you can ignore HHH helping Rollins last week not being brought up. Rollins seemingly turning face (or at least starting it off) is a really good thing and WAY overdue but it certainly seems to be a slower burn than a full on version. Either way, Clash just got a lot better looking on paper.
After a break, Stephanie and Foley are yelling at each other (Stephanie’s third appearance in twenty three minutes) when Owens comes up. Foley gives him a match against Sami Zayn, which draws in Jericho. Chris gets in a hilarious line by calling Owens the longest reigning Universal Champion in history. That earns him a match against Rollins later.
Charlotte vs. Bayley
Non-title and Charlotte has given Dana a clipboard to take notes. Bayley starts in on the arm and throws some Japanese armdrags, only to have Charlotte send her face first into the buckle. That just fires Bayley up and she sends Charlotte into the buckles a few times instead. Charlotte heads outside and Bayley tries a dropkick under the ropes (think Sami’s diving DDT) but leaves it way short, leaving her to just kick Charlotte in the chest instead. Bayley is favoring her knee as we go to a break.
Back with Charlotte holding the figure four neck lock and actually getting two off a rollup. Charlotte slams the bad leg into the corner and then wraps it around the leg. That sets up a half crab and DDT on the knee but Bayley grabs a rollup to break the momentum. Some limping ax handles to the chest have Charlotte in trouble but Dana pulls Charlotte out of the way of an elbow. Somehow that’s not a DQ so Bayley kicks Charlotte into Dana and hits the Bayley to Belly for the pin at 12:40.
Rating: C+. The important thing here is the time. This match worked because it had some time to set up the leg injury and the ending made sense (save for ANOTHER lack of a disqualification) due to the extra focus it received. You can’t do anything important in a four minute match and it helped so much to actually let this thing go somewhere for a change. Good stuff and the PPV rematch is obvious.
Connor’s Cure video for children’s cancer awareness month.
Charlotte yells at Dana, who promises to make up for it. That earns her one heck of a slap in the face.
Bo Dallas vs. Kyle Roberts
Bo is all serious here despite holding up a BELIEVE IN BO sign (please don’t let this be ANOTHER political themed character) He takes Roberts down and hammers away before snapping off some knees to the face. A Roll of the Dice (as Cole described it) puts Roberts away in 38 seconds.
Owens and Jericho fire each other up.
Chris Jericho vs. Seth Rollins
Rollins starts fast with a dropkick and sends Jericho outside for a suicide dive. Oh yeah he’s wrestling like a face. Back in and Jericho slaps him a few times as the fans aren’t sure who to cheer for. Jericho sends him face first into the buckle and we take a break. Back with Rollins hammering away and getting two off the Sling Blade. A Blockbuster gets the same and Rollins might as well have a big sign saying YEP I’M A FACE NOW around his neck.
Rollins dropkicks him out of the air but gets caught in the Walls. That goes as far as you would expect and Rollins’ low superkick gets two. Rollins gets caught on top but still shoves Jericho off, only to miss the frog splash. The Lionsault gets a close two as this is really picking up. The Codebreaker is broken up and a Pedigree puts Jericho away at 13:47.
Rating: B. Anyone who has watched Rollins for years now has known he would be an awesome face and that’s certainly what you got here. Rollins looked great out there and he’s just so easy to cheer with this offense. I don’t think he gets the title back at Clash but it’s going to be fun watching him in this new role.
Cesaro vs. Sheamus
Match #3 in the series with Cesaro down 2-0 and coming in with a bad shoulder/back. Cesaro grabs some rollups for early near falls but a backdrop has him in trouble. Sheamus sends the back into the apron and drives in some knees. The Cloverleaf is blocked but Sheamus grabs four straight Irish Curses for a near fall. With that not working, Sheamus lifts him up for the Celtic Cross but drops it down into a backbreaker. The Brogue Kick makes it 3-0 to Sheamus at 4:06.
Rating: C. Well that happened and I really don’t care. Thank goodness the fourth match is at a house show on Wednesday so I don’t have to put up with seeing them again that many times. The back injury is fine but my goodness I’ve seen enough of these matches for my lifetime. It really feels like a way to give the writers a month off and that gets old in a hurry.
Shining Stars vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass
Before the match, Enzo thinks he’s in labor so Cass, who has watched a lot of ER, performs Lamaze with HOW YOU DOING replacing the “hoo hoo” part. Enzo and Cass take over to start and it’s off to a quick break. Back with Enzo in trouble but avoiding a Primo charge and making the hot tag off to Cass. The Bada Boom Shaka Lacka is broken up and Epico rolls Enzo up with a handful of trunks at 7:05. Too much was in the break to rate but I’d again like to point out that NO ONE CARES ABOUT THE SHINING STARS.
Sami Zayn says his career has been stuck in place since he beat Owens, who is now the Universal Champion. Owens comes in and laughs at the idea that Sami is chasing him now. The race will never be over and Sami says he’ll win the title on his own, without HHH handing it to him on a silver platter.
Nia Jax vs. Ann Esposito
Apparently Ann is friends Alicia Fox. Nia throws her around to start but gets caught in a sleeper to actually put her in trouble. That earns Ann a ram into the corner and a throw to the mat, followed by three straight Umaga attacks in the corner. A fireman’s carry into a powerslam (with a pause before the powerslam) ends Ann at 1:38.
It’s time for Anderson and Gallows to not be funny. Now they’re retirement specialists who have already gotten rid of the Dudley Boyz, so now let’s welcome the OLD DAY. Cue some New Day impersonators (one on a motorized scooter, one on a walker and one on a cane) to a slow motion version of their theme. The crowd is just silent for this as the Old Day says everything changed for them at Clash of Champions. We get every old person joke you can imagine, including Big E.’s hips going out as he does the swivel.
Cue the real New Day to ask which X-Man is their favorite. For some reason it’s Cyclops…..which isn’t all that funny. Kofi thinks there’s a paradox taking place here and if the New Day comes into contact with the Old Day, the WWE Universe will explode. Anderson and Gallows bail and dancing ensues, only to have Old Day’s sneak attack completely fail. The old guys are beaten down to finally wrap this up. This went on WAY too long and it just wasn’t very funny.
We look back at the opening sequence.
Darren Young vs. Jinder Mahal
Titus O’Neil is on commentary for reasons of pure torture. Darren gets an early two off a swinging neckbreaker but has to fight out of a chinlock. Titus goes out to ringside as Darren hits the Gut Check for the pin at 2:15.
Darren and Titus fight again after the match.
Alicia Fox checks on her injured friend when Nia Jax, who just happened to be there, shows up and laughs. Total Divas is mentioned and Fox yells a lot while throwing things. Nia just leaves as she goes nuts.
Braun Strowman vs. Sin Cara
Well it’s better than jobber after jobber. Cara is fighting due to Braun ripping off the luchador’s mask last week. A dropkick sends Braun into the corner but he explodes out with a shoulder. We hit the neck crank and nerve hold for a bit before Braun sends him outside. Cara is tossed into the steps but comes back with a dropkick, only to be whipped into the barricade for the countout at 2:11. Are we really going to have to watch this again next week? Really?
Strowman beats Cara up even worse post match.
Here’s Sasha Banks for an announcement. She talks about how every story has an ending before talking about the Divas Revolution. Back in July 2015, Stephanie McMahon (oh yeah) introduced the Divas Revolution and it was a new era without bra and panties matches (which there hadn’t been in YEARS) and no more butterfly title (not for about nine months actually).
This revolution was about every little girl and every person who has been told they’re not enough. She used to collect soda cans to try to save up enough money to come to a WWE event. Sasha starts crying as she talks about being injured at Summerslam and she has an update on her condition. Cue Dana Brooke to say she’s going to use Sasha’s broken body to finish what Charlotte started at Summerslam. Dana goes after Sasha but gets caught in a Bank Statement. The bad news was for Charlotte, who will be facing Sasha at Clash of Champions.
Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens
Non-title. They start slugging it out at the bell and it’s quickly outside with Sami going shoulder first into the barricade. Sami does his moonsault off the barricade (and kicks Owens square in the face) as we take a break. Back with Sami fighting out of a chinlock and sending Owens to the floor for back to back flip dives.
The Blue Thunder Bomb gets two but Owens rolls to the apron before the Helluva Kick. A Stunner over the ropes has Sami in trouble but the half and half suplex gets two on the champ. Sami climbs the ropes but lands on a bad ankle. Owens can’t hit the apron powerbomb so Sami grabs another half and half to drop Kevin on his head. Back in and the ankle gives out again, setting up the Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin on Sami at 13:05.
Rating: B-. This was their usual good match but you knew Owens wasn’t going to lose his first match as the champion. Sami will probably get his title match at some point in the future and that’s going to be one heck of a rollercoaster when they finally get there. Good stuff here though but this show is way past saving.
Post match here’s Roman Reigns to a LOUD chorus of booing. Chris Jericho comes out to have Owens’ back but Foley prevents the violence. Next week it’s Roman vs. Owens and if Reigns wins, it’s a triple threat at Clash of the Champions. They had that same booking idea recently on Smackdown and it’s still overdone here. Reigns spears Jericho to let off some steam and end the show.
Overall Rating: D. This show hit a wall in the middle and it just never recovered. That being said, it’s not like they had that much good going on in the first place. I liked the opening sequence and there was some good wrestling in the middle but pretty much everything from Cesaro vs. Sheamus until the main event was just death. Then again this is a holiday show and no one is going to watch it but it gets really tiring watching a badly bloated show with so little effort from the creative side of things.
Results
Bayley b. Charlotte – Bayley to Belly
Bo Dallas b. Kyle Roberts – Roll of the Dice
Seth Rollins b. Chris Jericho – Pedigree
Sheamus b. Cesaro – Brogue Kick
Shining Stars b. Enzo Amore/Big Cass – Rollup with a handful of trunks
Nia Jax b. Ann Esposito – Powerslam
Darren Young b. Jinder Mahal – Gut Check
Braun Strowman b. Sin Cara via countout
Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb
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