Fall Brawl 2000 (2016 Redo): That Sweet Spot Between Wrestling And Crazy

Fall Brawl 2000
Date: September 17, 2000
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 8,638
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

This should be an interesting show as I can barely remember what’s going on with the card. However, I can remember that Vince Russo had a huge gimmick match built around him with a big SWERVE that no one (NO ONE) saw coming in a one off show. Other than that we have Kevin Nash defending against Booker T. in a cage, which certainly doesn’t feel like a step down after the big cage match about two weeks ago. Let’s get to it.

We open with a look at the double main event, as partially reenacted by action figures. Well that’s certainly different. I’m not sure it’s a good idea but it’s definitely a different one.

Cruiserweight Title: Kwee Wee vs. Elix Skipper

Kwee Wee is defending after winning a match a few weeks back, despite having no interaction with Skipper that I’ve seen in the ensuing shows. Skipper tries to dance with Gunns during the entrance as Hudson drools over her in the maple leaf top. Kwee Wee loads him up for a slam but drops Skipper face first instead in a unique move. An armbar has Skipper in trouble and a USA chant starts up. No wonder Buffalo sends the Bills to Toronto every once in awhile.

Back up and Skipper forearms Kwee Wee in the back of the head as we can see the ridiculous amount of glitter all over Gunns’ back. Skipper flips over Kwee Wee and gets two off a dragon suplex. Gunns plays cheerleader as Kwee Wee fights out of a chinlock, causing Madden to go on another tirade.

In one of the worst spots I’ve seen in a long time, Kwee Wee hits a cross body but Skipper stays on his feet and drops Kwee Wee out to the floor, only to get his balance and then fall out as well because he forgot to fall at the same time. Skipper makes up for it with a top rope Asai Moonsault which knocks out a cameraman for that always cool looking crash. Back in and Kwee Wee counters the Overdrive into a layout powerbomb for two of his own.

Cue the Thrillers, who really have no reason to be involved in this match. Skipper is thrown over the top and out to the floor with his knee crashing into the barricade. As the referee checks on him, Mike Sanders sneaks in and blasts Kwee Wee in the leg with a stick ball bat for no logical reason. Back in and a chop block sets up the Overdrive to retain Skipper’s title.

Rating: C. Illogical ending aside, this wasn’t the worst opener in the world. Kwee Wee is now a face just because, but someone with his charisma probably deserves to be in a higher spot on the card. Skipper is an athletic freak but there’s only so much of a character for him. Not much to see here though as the Cruiserweight Title has just died in recent months.

The announcers run down the card with Madden saying Goldberg vs. Steiner is going to go off like a prom dress. There is WAY too much emphasis on teenage sex in 2000 WCW.

3 Count vs. Misfits in Action

Cajun/Loco/A-Wall here. We get a little I Can’t Get You Out Of My Heart before the match, which I believe is a bonus. Hudson: “Helen Keller, big 3 Count fan.” Loco and Shannon get things going and this actually has potential. Loco chops him up against the ropes before grabbing a good looking wheelbarrow suplex. It’s off to Cajun for a flapjack on Karagias before it’s off to Wall, who presses Helms into a spinebuster (cool move) for two.

Karagias trips Cajun up though, allowing a fireman’s carry/neckbreaker combination to get two more as the heels take over. It’s Cajun as the face in peril with Shannon getting two off a Fameasser. A cross body/suplex gets the same and Evan drops a top rope elbow for another near fall. Shannon gets two off a top rope splash but misses another splash in the corner, allowing the hot tag off to Wall for some house cleaning.

Everything breaks down and Shannon takes Cajun out with a springboard flip dive. Karagias drops Loco and Cajun with a dive of his own but A-Wall breaks up a dive, only to get dropkicked through the table. Shane superkicks Evan by mistake and Shannon dives into a powerbomb for two. A double DDT gets two more on Loco but Wall makes the save, allowing Cajun to hit the Whiplash for the pin on Shane.

Rating: B. I know this really should be obvious but it’s amazing how much fun it is to watch a good wrestling match between talented guys. There’s no big angle here or some crazy story. Instead it’s just three heels and three heroes having a wrestling match and entertaining the fans. In other words, it’s the best thing this company has done in months. Just let the talented guys wrestle and it’s going to work.

Earlier today, Nash wouldn’t sign an autograph for a kid. Why this kid was backstage when the wrestlers arrived isn’t explained of course, but I’m thinking his parents should be punished for letting him see such a horror show.

There are more and more empty seats opposite the hard camera after every match. That’s sad to see. Understandable, but sad.

Harris Brothers vs. Kronik

It’s a chain match but Adams wants to make it first blood because Heaven forbid either team takes a fall. It’s a brawl to start (duh) with Adams working over Don inside. The guys are chained together here, which is probably better than watching them try to work a regular tag match. Everyone heads into the crowd as Tony asks how the referee is supposed to know who bleeds first. Well, he could watch on the big screen like most of the fans have to, but maybe he gets some special privilege because he works here.

Adams and Don come back to ringside with the latter going face first into the steps. Their partners are back a few seconds later, including Don screaming at some fans for some of the only heel action you’ll see around here. The referee gets bumped because A FIRST BLOOD CHAIN MATCH NEEDS A FREAKING REF BUMP.

Adams beats on Don (as the announcers change which Harris is with which Kronik guy, though it’s about as important as which Uso is which) and busts him open. Madden: “THAT’S GRAPE JUICE!” Hudson: “Did he get his period for Pete’s sake???” Ron gets the ball bat with a chain wrapped around it to bust Adams open as the referee wakes up, giving the Twins the win.

Rating: D. I’d like to emphasize that these four can’t even have a clean finish in a first blood chain match. Do you really need to protect one of the most dominant tag teams in years with two gimmicks in one match? It’s really that bad in WCW these days? Nothing to see here, but at least it was short.

Rection promises to win the title back for America today. This match is dedicated to Jim Duggan, who just happens to be here as guest enforcer. Just turn him heel already.

US Title: General Rection vs. Lance Storm

Storm is defending, Major Gunns is on the line as a bonus and Duggan is guest enforcer. Before the match, Storm says he’s so close yet so far from home. After tonight, everyone is welcome to join him in Ontario for Nitro tonight night. Duggan finally comes out and you can see the second shirt underneath his referee shirt so just get to the screwjob already so Tony can call it unthinkable.

Rection’s Samoan Drop gets no cover but Storm sends him into the corner for a breather. A nice superkick gets two for the champ and they head outside where Duggan mimes shooting Storm with the 2×4. Back in and Rection shrugs off the attacks on the knee before sending Storm flying off a German suplex. It’s time for No Laughing Matter but of course Duggan hits Rection with the board, setting up the Maple Leaf to retain the title.

Rating: D. Mike Tenay, Gene Okerlund, Miss Elizabeth and now Jim Duggan. In other words, take whatever characters have worked so well over the years and turn them all around because Vince Russo and company have decided that this is the way things really should go. Again, there was no shock here when you had Duggan as the guest enforcer for no logical reason and introduced him on Monday for the sake of this one match.

The Thrillers almost get in a fight with Gene (who did threaten to have “people” break O’Haire’s kneecaps) and promises to beat up something made of Cheese-Whiz.

Natural Born Thrillers vs. Filthy Animals/Paul Orndorff/Big Vito

It’s….uh….honestly I’m not sure who all is in this match. There are a bunch of people standing on the floor because the aprons are full. Konnan was too injured to wrestle on Thunder but he’s in the ring here while Stasiak is on the floor. Orndorff is a mystery partner to freak the Thrillers out in an idea that always works.

Jindrak slams Rey around to start as Hudson talks about Disqo costing the Animals the Tag Team Titles. I can’t think of a joke to cover up the fact that Thunder was non-title and the Animals have the title belts and were flashing them all over the place during the entrances. Hudson really is just that dumb. Juvy comes in and gets beaten down by Jindrak and O’Haire before it’s off to Disqo for the sake kind of beating. Konnan gets the tag and punches Sean a few times until O’Haire takes over again. We get some miscommunication from the Animals that leads to Disqo Stunning Konnan for the first elimination.

It’s off to Johnny the Bull vs. Disqo with Johnny jumping from the mat to the apron with no hands, only to miss a legdrop. Amazing athleticism but not the smartest guy. Disqo’s partners won’t tag in though, allowing Reno to Roll the Dice for the elimination. Vito comes in and Mafia Kicks Reno before hitting the Vito Special (spinning lifting DDT) for two on Palumbo.

We get back to Vito vs. Reno with the former grabbing the stick ball bat, only to get blasted with a kendo stick from the apron. Another Roll the Dice gets rid of Vito and we’re down to the full Thrillers vs. Orndorff/Juvy/Rey/Tygress. Ok so it was seven on seven? Tony: “It’s six on two! If you count Orndorff, six on three!” Well three Animals have been eliminated and the Animals are at full strength so the match started at six on six? Juvy and Reno are in now with the champ (yes Hudson, he’s still a champion) getting in a dropkick to take over. The Juvy Driver on Reno sets up the Nutcracker Sweet to get rid of Reno.

Jindrak/O’Haire get in to fight Rey/Juvy with the champs in trouble as Rey is sent outside. Juvy tries to dive on the Thrillers on the floor, only to get caught in midair and sent thrown back inside. The Seanton Bomb eliminates Juvy and the announcers say that Orndorff is left, despite Rey not being eliminated and Tygress getting on the apron. Orndorff finally comes in and cleans house until Johnny hits him in the back with the kendo stick. That goes nowhere though as Orndorff grabs the piledriver to get rid of Johnny.

Jindrak misses a charge in the corner and Orndorff drops Sean with a knee lift. Another piledriver plants Mark….and Orndorff isn’t moving. Sean gets a quick cover for the pin as we’ve clearly got an injury here. Tygress gives Jindrak a Bronco Buster as Orndorff hasn’t moved. Rey and Tygress beat up the Thrillers like the goons they are as Orndorff is at least moving his arms. The match is FINALLY thrown out because of Orndorff.

Rating: D+. The ending hut it a lot but at the same time I really had no idea who was in the match at any given time. The Thrillers cleaned house at times but it’s a bad sign when you forget who is still in the match and who isn’t. Orndorff was the highlight of the match as he knew how to get around the Thrillers because he trained them, even if the announcers never actually brought it up.

Orndorff is put in a neck brace as the show basically stops.

Kidman and Madusa call Torrie a lot of bad names and promise to send her and Shane flying off the scaffold. Madusa is WAY more fired up than she should be here.

Madusa/Kidman vs. Torrie Wilson/Shane Douglas

The scaffold is on the stage and rises up to save some time. Shane runs his mouth to fill in some time before hand, only to remind us of his promise to refund everyone’s money if his team loses. The rules here are you have to crawl across and get down the other side to win. Not send your opponents flying as everyone talked about, but just crawl across and climb down. Thankfully the scaffold is significantly wider than most instances with probably five to six feet from side to side. Tony to Madden: “Get your jokes out now so I can hype this up a bit.”

Shane and Kidman argue over how high the scaffold goes as you might expect them to do. The women fight at one end and for some reason Madusa doesn’t just bunch Torrie in the face and climb down to win. Instead Madusa goes after Shane and tries to kick him over the middle, only to be pulled into the STF. Kidman makes the save but gets powerslammed, allowing the women to go to different ends of the scaffold. Shane hits the Franchiser as Madusa’s leg gets caught in the ladder. Well of course she does.

Shane goes over and kicks her in the head for the crash onto the VERY soft pad to end this mess. Wait that’s not it? So you still have to climb down? What happens if everyone falls off? Does the match continue until they get out of traction and climb up and down again? Torrie hits Kidman low and Shane throws him down through another crash pad We’re STILL not done as they have to climb down to win. What a stupid set of rules.

Rating: F. What more do you want me to say here? They gave away the ending and the whole thing was on a scaffold. At least they had a setup where the fans could see what was going on, but this was so stupid on almost every level. It’s a bad gimmick that has worked all of once ever (maybe) and now we have this mess, which comes ten minutes after a legitimate injury.

The “match” goes on for about a minute and a half extra as they climb down.

Jeff Jarrett, in a Buffalo Bills jersey to tick off the local crowd, jumps Sting from behind because he’s getting the title shot on Nitro.

And now, a segment with Mike Tenay going to David Flair’s house for an interview. Tenay says he’s all alone, minus the cameraman and probably a producer of course. David’s house is a disaster with pizza, beer and newspapers everywhere. Tenay brings up the father of the baby so David freaks out because it might be his eleven year old brother Reid. That goes nowhere so Tenay suggests Ric, only to have David freak out and attack his mailman. Thankfully there was a cameraman waiting by David’s mailbox to see David put him in the Figure Four. David then runs down the street.

Vampiro vs. Great Muta vs. Sting

PLEASE let this be the grand finale. The Clowns take over commentary for what should be hilarious. Vampiro and Sting fight in the aisle until the Grand Poobah comes out to attack Chickenwing (oh yeah they’re on fire tonight). They head into the crowd for a bit with the Clowns switching between Gray Tuna and talking about Sting’s spandex pants. Shaggy: “The Winger was trained by a speckled belly octopus.”.

They get back inside with Muta standing around and watching as Sting beats on Vampiro. Some spinning kicks from Muta set up a top rope clothesline from Vampiro as the announcers want to see the patented Pickle Pinch. The moonsault gets two on Sting but the Clowns have to break up a fight between Muta and Vampiro. Sting cleans house with a ball bat (Hudson: “That’s clown abuse”) and Death Drops Muta for the pin.

Rating: F. Other than the commentary, this was another disaster as this feud has gone nowhere but just continues for whatever reason. Sting has no character at this point other than “he’s Sting” and that’s nowhere near enough for an old veteran who is supposed to be some kind of a big prize for Vampiro to beat. This was Muta’s last TV match and I don’t think he’s going to be missed. That’s not a knock on him as his in ring work has been fine enough, but sweet goodness this story has been horrible.

Sting saves Muta from a post match beatdown.

Earlier tonight, Mike Awesome offered to make whoopee (his words) with Pamela. Awesome’s surprise for Jarrett tonight: Gary Coleman.

Mike Awesome vs. Jeff Jarrett

Bunkhouse Brawl, meaning hardcore. Jarrett yells at some of the Buffalo Bills on his way to the ring where the weapons are already set up. Jeff rants about the Bills losing to the Titans last year in the NFL playoffs, which took place about nine months before this show. Now we get on to Awesome, who Jeff guarantees a beating. Hudson: “NOT WITH GARY COLEMAN YOU’RE NOT!”

Thankfully Awesome comes out in regular gear but somehow doesn’t see the professional wrestler in a football jersey coming after him. Mike chokes him with a noose so Jeff beats on him with a broom. A chair duel goes badly for Jarrett and Awesome blasts him over the back a few times. Hudson talks about making Mike the Career Killing 70s Fat Chick Thriller to put all three gimmicks in one. Back in and the Super Awesome Bomb is countered with a backdrop through a table as this is getting more and more like ECW every day.

Awesome whips him into the barbed wire board twice in a row and a pop up sitout powerbomb gets two on Jarrett. Of course he pops right back up and taunts the Bills even more, drawing them over the barricade to get on the apron. The Bills get in a few shots and the Awesome Bomb gets two. The referee FINALLY gets the Bills off the apron so the fans can see, only to have Gary Coleman run in to break up a guitar shot with a low blow. That earns Coleman a guitar shot but now Sting runs in for a Death Drop to give Awesome the pin.

Rating: D. It took the Buffalo Bills, Gary Coleman and Sting to allow Awesome to get the pin. This is the definition of a match where the writers just threw together whatever nonsense they could come up with and had fun instead of trying to entertain people. The thing makes sense (if you have enough hard booze handy) but it’s WAY overdone to accomplish anything. At least Awesome won though.

We recap Scott Steiner vs. Goldberg which started when Goldberg walked out on the match at New Blood Rising, only to have Steiner beat up Goldberg’s girlfriend. None of this was mentioned for the two weeks before the match because the story stopped mattering once the match was set up, as is so often the case around here.

Steiner shouts that he’ll win.

Goldberg vs. Scott Steiner

No DQ of course. Steiner puts on a black mask and stalls a bit at the bell. Back in and Goldberg scores with a flying shoulder, followed by a gorilla press into a powerslam for two. It’s time to start the heavy brawling as the announcers say this has been going for five minutes (we’re approaching two). Back in and Goldberg runs him over again but the banged up arm slows Goldberg down.

The spear mostly hits the buckle but he’s still able to catch Steiner diving off the top in a powerslam, complete with a pause where Goldberg pulls him out of the air before slamming him. Cue the returning Midajah with a pipe but Steiner is fine enough to tie Goldberg in the Tree of Woe for some chairs to the ribs. The bloody Goldberg is thrown down with a suplex as Hudson can’t remember what Goldberg did to put Midajah through a table. As in he can’t remember THE ONE MOVE that Goldberg uses to finish people.

The pipe is knocked away with a spear but here’s Russo to break up the Jackhammer with a baseball bat shot. Steiner slams Goldberg through a table and Russo celebrates like he did it himself. There’s the Recliner but Goldberg does the slow crawl to the ropes, even though there was almost no pull on the hold.

An electric chair really breaks the hold but Midajah and Russo hit Goldberg with their objects, setting up a belly to belly superplex from Steiner. Back to the Recliner and the thing looks SO bad with Steiner really just putting his hands on Goldberg’s chin and not touching the arms. That swinging neckbreaker puts Scott down but he hits Goldberg with the pipe and puts the Recliner on for the third time for the knockout.

Rating: B-. This was fun (horrible finishing move aside) and it kept Goldberg looking strong while also making Steiner look like the killer they needed him to be. It was all about two guys beating the heck out of each other for about thirteen minutes, though I really could have gone without Russo being in there to screw things up, though to be fair it’s his company and vanity project at this point so it’s understandable.

The villains celebrate and Russo takes his shirt off to really make it special.

We recap Booker vs. Nash, with the latter turning heel to steal the title, which he decided he wanted for a change. Russo rigged things and decided that HIS Kevin Nash was going to take the title. The evil plan actually worked and tonight it’s the rematch inside a cage.

Booker says he’s here for revenge because if you don’t start none, there won’t be none.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Kevin Nash

Nash is defending inside a regular cage. Madden asks if it’s harder to win a title the first time or get it back. Hudson: “I’ve never held a World Championship.” Given that it’s Hudson, I take that to mean he’s won at least six of them. Booker goes after the arm to start without any real success as the announcers talk about switching from the big cage to the regular version. That’s really not something you hear very often. Nash clotheslines him down as we’re told that Orndorff has a stinger but he’s talking and has feeling in all limbs.

A turnbuckle gets ripped off but Booker slams him down to take over again. The Bookend is broken up though and Nash plants him with a chokeslam for a delayed two. Booker sends the champ face first into the exposed buckle to draw some blood, followed by the missile dropkick getting two more. A low blow puts Booker down and there’s the big boot to the face. The Jackknife is broken up and the Bookend gives Booker the title back.

Rating: D. This is the definition of “well that happened.” There was zero need for this to be in the cage as it didn’t change anything and felt like a dark match instead of something that you needed to see. Booker getting the title back is fine and the pin was clean so it’s much better than some insane fall that takes a million angles to achieve. Not a good match or anything close to one, but a good result.

Overall Rating: C-. The key to this show is simple: they’re slowing down on some things and not having a million angles in every match. The main event was clean, a lot of the midcard stuff was clean and most of the interference made sense. That’s the big difference here: you don’t want to have interference for the sake of interference because it takes away from the moments where it’s needed. Goldberg vs. Steiner for instance had interference that made sense and it was more effective as a result.

However, there’s still a lot wrong here. There are WAY too many gimmick matches or matches where the gimmicks take away from what’s going on otherwise. For instance, look at the elimination tag. Did you really need to have EVERYONE in there or could it have been cut down to say, four on four? The biggest thing that WCW can’t understand is that sometimes, less is more. It’s ok to have a wrestling match for the sake of having a wrestling match and to just let it go where it goes without five plot devices along the way.

Overall, this is the best pay per view they’ve done in a long time because they’re getting closer to having a balance between the insanity and an actual show. The show is still far from actually good, but at least they’re not making me spend an hour going on about how horrible the show was or how it broke the rules of wrestling. Somehow, that’s a major step forward for them, which is really sad to think about.

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Thunder – September 13, 2000: They’re Doing What Now?

Thunder
Date: September 13, 2000
Location: Civic Center, Roanoke, Virginia
Commentators: Stevie Ray, Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay

It’s the final show before Fall Brawl and as usual they’re having issues setting up the pay per view because the bigger priority is building up the TV shows. Monday saw Scott Steiner attach Goldberg to a bus which didn’t work because that’s the kind of thing you set up and blow off in all of a minute. Let’s get to it.

We open with Miss Jones on the phone with Cat, who is assured that everything is fine. Cue Jarrett to take the phone and say not quite before kidnapping Jones. As usual, women are objects and plot devices on these shows.

David Flair is freaking out about the idea that various men might be the father of the baby. Does David actually wrestle anymore? I can’t remember the last match he actually had.

Here are Nash, Jarrett and Steiner to open things up. Nash brags about making the fans buy into the swerve on Monday and I have issues remembering which one it was. They tend to run together when you have one every single week. He’s also ready for the cage match on Sunday, which they haven’t exactly given a ton of focus. Steiner brags about having sex with a lot of women and talks about how big his arms are. Jeff makes Jones lay down (shocking) for a five count and threatens a guitar shot.

This brings out the recently arrived Cat along with Booker, the latter of whom gives out his lame catchphrases. Cat makes a tag match for later with Nash/Steiner vs. Cat/Booker where whoever gets the fall gets the title. Jarrett only gets Sting, which prompts Jeff to guitar Dave Penzer for whatever reason.

Disqo has booked the Filthy Animals in a non-title match against Kronik and the Harris Brothers. Why he would do that isn’t exactly clear, but he thinks it could get them the #1 ranking in WOW Magazine.

Thunder Tailgate Party video.

An angry Mike Awesome arrives. I’d be mad too. He’s in a leisure suit and Justin Credible is the top heel in ECW.

Disqo has also booked himself and Konnan against Jindrak/O’Haire, but Konnan isn’t clear to wrestle. Therefore, Tygress is getting the spot. Well of course she is.

Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire vs. Disqo Inferno/Tygress

Before the match, Sanders introduces Johnny the Bull as the newest Thriller. Johnny really enjoyed beating Vito down and is horrible at this whole talking thing. Disqo starts with Sean and thankfully the rookie cleans his clock, which unfortunately means it’s off to Tygress, drawing a big rant from Tenay about how women don’t belong here. That’s just so against anything he’s said for years and really comes off as the writers not knowing how character development works. You don’t just slap characteristics on people and assume they work.

The Thrillers literally throw Tygress back and forth in the air as Disqo runs off to get help. You know, instead of helping himself. Jindrak tries to give Tygress a Bronco Buster but that’s a bit too much even for WCW, so she hits a Bronco Buster of her own. That earns her a sitout powerbomb, followed by the Seanton Bomb for the pin. Total squash of course.

The Animals finally come back out (why they weren’t there in the first place isn’t clear) but get beaten down by the Thrillers.

David beats up a referee for suggesting that he’d brag about sleeping with Ms. Hancock.

Team Canada teaches Major Gunns to speak Canadian. I think you can write the jokes yourselves, even though Storm really wouldn’t seem likely to do something like that.

Sting is annoyed at not being in the main event recently as even he’s forgotten WarGames. Therefore, he’d like a title shot against Booker on Nitro if Booker gets the title back. That’s rather forward of him.

Disqo has to defend himself from the Animals blaming him for the loss.

It’s time for the Lava Lamp Lounge with special guest Major Gunns. So if Storm didn’t let her out there, would he really just have screwed up the entire segment? That’s not the nicest way to help international relations. Awesome gets straight to hitting on her as Gunns goes on a rant about how much she hates being around Lance Storm. Mike suggests a massage so here’s Team Canada for the brawl with Awesome throwing Skipper around with ease.

Cue the MIA to say Gunns needs to come back home. Storm agrees and offers a tag match with Duggan/Rection vs. Team Canada with Gunns on the line. What’s in it for the Canadians isn’t clear but they’re kind of odd at times. That’s it for the show but a janitor lays out Awesome and of course it’s Jarrett. Much like the other major matches, I’m not entirely sure why they’re fighting at this point or why we’re going to see them in a hardcore match but I’m sure a guy dressing up as a janitor and breaking a guitar over a 70s enthusiast in a leisure suit who hits on every woman he can find will sell itself.

More Tailgate Party stuff.

Rection asks Duggan to be his partner in the tag match later. Dang it’s lucky that Duggan was just sitting there in case someone needed a tag match for AMERICA.

Steiner and Nash charge a kid $60 for a picture with Steiner covering the kid’s face. Simple idea but kind of a needless segment.

Here are Shane and Torrie (good night) to talk about how awesome the mixed tag scaffold match is going to be. Unfortunately he spoils it by promising everyone a full refund if his team loses. This brings out Madusa and Billy Kidman because we’re getting a preview right now.

Shane Douglas/Torrie Wilson vs. Madusa/Billy Kidman

Shane takes Madusa to the mat with a lot less difficulty than he should have but Kidman is chasing Torrie around, drawing Shane to the floor for a save. That’s already enough as the match is thrown out in a hurry, so at least they didn’t waste much of Sunday’s THRILLING scaffold match.

Kidman goes after Torrie again and knocks her over a balcony, giving us the most obvious action movie shot I’ve ever seen in wrestling with Torrie hanging off a balcony to save herself. Just go make B movies already as it’s clear what they want to do.

Post break, Kidman and Madusa rant about the scaffold match.

Your weekly sitdown interview is with Ric Flair and it’s fully storyline stuff here with the first questions being about the wedding and Hancock’s announcement. Ric talks about how screwy things have been lately due to the efforts of Vince Russo but then they were in an arena for a wedding to a great woman. He and David bonded again and Ric had everything he wanted again. Tenay doesn’t seem to buy this but Ric isn’t going to be intimidated. “You’re not talking to Midajah here.”

Ric lists off some of the people he’s wrestled and doesn’t like the idea that Tenay stopped after the 1980s. That brings Tenay back to Ric vs. Russo, who got the better of Ric. For some reason Tenay doesn’t buy that but Ric says he’s out of the business because he lost a match where his career was on the line. It was Ric’s fault that he brought his family on TV and let Russo get under his skin but Russo is a snake. Tenay flat out asks if Ric is the father of Hancock’s baby and that’s the end of the interview with Ric walking off after saying Tenay is just like Russo. Well that’s quite the insult.

I really do not want to know where this story was going to go, but the more I think about it, the more I think it was likely to be Russo. Why not? He’s gotten the better of the Flair’s every single time so why not let him do that too? I mean, he can destroy Ric’s career and take over his family so why not have him impregnate one of the most beautiful women in the world too?

Fit Finlay tells David to calm down with all of the questions about who is the father. Why in the world is Finlay not in the ring either?

Jeff Jarrett vs. Sting

This is now 2/3 falls, which could make for a good match if they don’t screw the whole thing up. While Sting is on the way to the ring, Tony brags about Nitro’s ratings from the previous night. As in the 3.2 they got, down from the 3.6 the previous week. Before the match, Jeff tells Sting to forget about the title match because Nash is keeping the title. Instead Sting offers to make this a #1 contenders match, again because they just can. Sting takes him down to start as Stevie talks about Wahoo McDaniel.

The announcers actually bring up Sting vs. Vampiro vs. Muta on Sunday, which is indeed a match despite the lack of discussion over the last few months. A running clothesline puts Jarrett on the floor and it’s time to go to the announcers’ table. Stevie: “THIS IS THE ONLY TABLE WE GOT! WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS COMING OVER HERE???” Sting suplexes him up by the stage but Jeff stomps away back inside.

Some clotheslines set up a top rope splash for two on Jeff but the referee gets bumped, setting up a low blow and the Stroke to give Jarrett the first fall. Jeff throws him to the floor but gets caught in a quick sunset flip for the pin to tie it up. The third fall starts with an awkward grappling exchange, followed by the traditional trading of the sleepers. Jeff suplexes out of Sting’s version but gets knocked down, setting up Sting’s falling headbutt.

Back up and Jeff pulls the referee in the way of the Stinger Splash. This brings out a second and Jeff pulls him in the way as well but Sting doesn’t jump. Instead David Flair comes out to hit the referee with a broom stick for his earlier comments, meaning there’s no one to see Jarrett tap to the Deathlock. Not that it matters as Sting tells the timekeeper to ring the bell to end the match.

Rating: C+. This was working until the goofy ending but at least they didn’t screw it up too badly. As usual, Jarrett is at his best when he has someone to carry him to a good match and Sting, despite not being anywhere near his peak anymore, was still one of the better workers on the roster. If nothing else it was nice to see a match get some time for a change and it helped a lot.

The Misfits don’t have much to say.

Kronik vs. Filthy Animals vs. Harris Brothers

Non-title with Disqo on commentary. It’s a brawl between the big guys to start as the Animals just kind of stand back and watch. To be fair they’re above this kind of a match anyway. We settle down to Don hitting Clark low to take over inside but Adams makes the save when the Twins try to use a chain. The Animals get bored of waiting and dropkick Don right into High Times for the quick pin.

Rating: D. As usual, there really wasn’t much of a point to this and the champions, who are fighting the Thrillers on Sunday in a match that is barely getting any mention, were just there. However you can’t do the Twins vs. Kronik here because they’re doing it on Sunday. Why not do something like a singles ma……egads the thought of either Twin vs. Adams or Clark gave me a chill.

Post match the Twins beat Kronik down with a ball bat wrapped in a chain.

Here’s David Flair with something to say. He’s proud that his dad called him a man but at the same time he needs to find out what happened with Stacy and the father of the baby. This brings out Miss Hancock but before anything can be said, it’s Arn Anderson out to interrupt. David needs to chill because women are like buses: they come around every twenty minutes. That’s quite the public transportation system. Right now, all that matters is Stacy knowing who the father is, and Anderson hopes she does.

Jim Duggan is out cold underneath the American flag. I smell collusion.

Team Canada vs. General Rection

No Duggan so only Rection comes out to interrupt the Canadian national anthem. Rection goes after both of them to start before the bell and runs them over just like every hero does in the early stages of a handicap match. Skipper finally takes over with a springboard spinwheel kick though and the heels start in on the ribs to take over.

It’s off to Storm for some elbows to the ribs and that awesome dropkick of his for two. A kick to the face staggers Storm but Skipper gets in a knee to the back, setting up the Maple Leaf. Cue Duggan on a crutch (but no bandage on the head) but he can’t get out in time, meaning Rection taps out.

Rating: D+. Storm’s dropkick was great as always but it’s just not enough to make up for the fact that we’re supposed to get behind a guy named General Rection. Also make sure to ignore the fact that Duggan retired on Monday and is supposed to be back in action with no real explanation two days later. As usual, the wrestlers’ statements mean nothing and we’re supposed to ignore the continuity issues.

Post break, Rection wants a match on Sunday for Gunns and the title. I have no idea why the Canadians would agree with that but as usual, they never actually seem to make sense.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash/Scott Steiner vs. Booker T./The Cat

Nash is defending but anyone can win the title by getting the fall. It’s a brawl to start until Booker and Steiner officially get things going. Nash has to break up an early ax kick attempt so Steiner hits Cat with the title. In theory that should be a DQ but that’s not how WCW works at this point.

Cat pops up way too fast so Nash belts him down again, allowing the villains to take turns on Booker. I really have no idea why you would tag out here but logic isn’t the strongest point in this company. A double clothesline and big boot drop Booker twice in a row before a belly to belly gets two. There’s the Recliner to Booker with Nash making the save, only to have Goldberg come out on a motorcycle for a spear on Steiner, drawing the dreaded no contest to end the show.

Rating: D. Yeah as usual there’s only so much you can do here with a gimmick where it’s pretty clear they’re not switching the title and we’re just waiting on the screwy finish. Goldberg coming in was fine and actually shows a little focus on their match instead of having Steiner chain him to a bus for all of ten seconds or whatever that mess was on Monday.

Overall Rating: D. Nitro and Thunder are in an interesting place right now. The Monday show is a complete train wreck with the focus being on Russo despite him not being there and so many ideas floating around that I forget where the show even started. On the other hand, Thunder is a more coherent show but almost none of it feels like it’s tying in to the main storylines.

That being said, Thunder is the easier show to sit through as it’s not quite as insane, but much like a modern day Smackdown, you lose nothing if you don’t watch it. Fall Brawl is going to be interesting, as if nothing else I can watch the show and find out all the matches on the show because the TV leading up to it has been such a wild mess that I’ve kind of forgotten.

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Monday Nitro – September 4, 2000 (2016 Redo): Russo Does WarGames

Monday Nitro #256
Date: September 4, 2000
Location: Reunion Arena, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Jeremy Borash, Mark Madden

This is a special (kind of) show for me as I remembered hearing about WarGames 2000 on Thunder and wanting to see it. Being a moron of twelve at the time, I stayed home to watch that while Monday Night Raw was taking place ten minutes from my house and a buddy of mine had an extra ticket. To this day I can’t explain what I was thinking. Let’s get to it.

On a side note: this is five years to the day that Nitro debuted.

We open with a video on tonight’s big triple cage match with the teams announced. It’s a four on four match with the World Title on the line, which already gives us a lapse in logic. The match is also called Russo’s Revenge because WARGAMES isn’t MANLY enough.

Team Russo (Russo/Nash/Jarrett/Steiner) are coming to the ring.

New opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Insane Clown Posse vs. Juventud Guerrera/Rey Mysterio Jr.

The Clowns are challenging for reasons I’ll never understand. Konnan does his intro but gets jumped from behind to get things going. It’s a brawl to start with Rey dropkicking Violent J to the floor for a double dive from the champs. Back in and Shaggy dropkicks Juvy out of the air to let the Clowns take over.

Borash to Konnan and Disqo on commentary: “Do the ICP have it like that?” Somehow this turns into a discussion of Richard Gere as Shaggy takes Air Juvy (Poetry in Motion) and a Bronco Buster from Rey, only to have the Clowns pop up like it was nothing. J presses Rey over his head but gets dropkicked down, setting up a double dropkick from the champs. What’s Up with a legdrop instead of a headbutt puts J down to retain the titles.

Rating: C. Not a bad match here as the Clowns were kept to a minimum and mainly just had Rey and Juvy do all the work. The Clowns aren’t the worst in the ring but they definitely need someone to walk them through the match. I’m still not sure why the Animals turned face but at least Rey and Juvy, the most natural underdog team ever, aren’t supposed to be intimidating anymore.

Team Canada is in the gym and Storm is putting Major Gunns through boot camp. Gunns has to be taught to work as hard as a Canadian, which is nothing more than a reason to have her running on a treadmill.

Booker T., The Cat and Ms. Jones (in a neck brace) leave their hotel.

The triple cage is lowered way too early because here’s Russo, flanked by the Thrillers, with something to say. In case you’ve never seen it, the structure is the Cell with a hardcore (weapons cage) on top with a one man cage on top of that for one of the biggest things you’ll see in wrestling. Russo takes a quick shot at the Dallas Cowboys before explaining the idea of how you win this mess. Unlike Slamboree, you have to climb the ladder and get the belt at the top of the cage and then bring it back down and go out the door.

Tonight it’s going to be the babyface team against the heel team (his words), though he claims that Team Russo will be the babyfaces. Also there’s been an injunction that means Cat has no power. Therefore, the heels (as in Goldberg/Sting/Cat/Booker T.), all have to win qualifying matches to get into WarGames. If Goldberg actually wins, Russo will waive the no contact clause. It’s going to be so big that Nash is going to hand Russo the World Title on a plate. This brings out Nash who doesn’t look pleased. Yeah I’m sure.

Nash says this isn’t how things work because his title isn’t on the line unless he says it’s on the line. He only has to defend it once a month and maybe he’ll do it on the 29th day at the 11th hour if he feels like it. Russo says he’s the boss but Nash says in this cage, he’s Russo’s daddy. The lights go out and here’s Sting coming through a hole in the ring. Nash flips Russo off and leaves, allowing Sting to get in Russo’s face and say it’s showtime. No contact of course because that’s Vince Russo but whatever.

Sting turns back around so Russo climbs a ladder to get to the second cage. Sting chases him up but Scott Steiner and Jeff Jarrett come in. The Thrillers come in and move the ladder so here are Booker and the Cat to take them out. Russo uses the numbers game to get down but here’s Goldberg (fresh out of the desert, which hasn’t been mentioned yet) to chase him off. Geez people. You’re having an eight person triple cage match later and you felt the need to have a big segment inside the cage as well? On five days’ notice? Really?

Post break (and recap), Steiner and Jarrett yell at Russo for ticking Nash off.

Jeremy Borash is bald and we actually get a video of the Nitro Girls shaving his head. This was something about a ratings bet with Russo that isn’t elaborated on, thank goodness.

Here are the Harris Brothers with some footage to show us. It’s a clip of them going to a bar where Kronik is drinking and starting a fight. This has nothing on the Friendly Tap.

Shane Douglas wants Goldberg in a qualifying match so Russo grants the wish to get rid of him. The catch is Shane wants the Thrillers but Torrie says he doesn’t need them. Torrie and Shane leave so Russo sends the Thrillers out to keep an eye on him.

WarGames Qualifying Match: Sting vs. Great Muta/Vampiro

I’m assuming Muta and Vampiro can get into the cage if they win. Muta and Vampiro double team him to start but Sting clotheslines Vampiro to the floor. Back in and Vampiro grabs Sting but takes the Mist to the face by mistake. Muta is sent outside and a Death Drop pins Vampiro in just over a minute.

Post match the Clowns come out to yell at Muta but nothing happens.

Major Gunns, now drenched in sweat, is on another exercise machine and the camera just happens to be looking down at her in a low cut top.

Russo makes Stevie Ray wrestle tonight by threatening to take away his Thunder commentary job.

Jarrett tells Nash to get over his issues with Russo. Nash threatens to switch teams tonight.

WarGames Qualifying Match: Booker T. vs. Stevie Ray

Stevie says this is for the fans instead of Russo. Booker gives Russo his catchphrase and Stevie jumps him from behind to take over early on. Ray sends him face first into the steps for two before bending Booker’s arms back to slow things down. Back up and Booker hits a quick forearm to set up the ax kick. The Harlem Side Kick is caught in a kind of powerbomb but the Slap Jack is countered with a backdrop. The Book End sends Booker to the main event in a hurry.

Post match Booker yells at Stevie for jumping him. The explanation: suckas gots to know and a hug. Ok then.

Kronik asks the Jung Dragons where the Harris Brothers are but beats them up for not speaking English. Totally not a Kai En Tai knockoff.

Back from a break and Kronik triple chokeslams 3 Count for fun. They want the Harris Brothers right now but get Jeff Jarrett instead. The tag match isn’t happening tonight but here’s a handicap match for them instead.

WarGames Qualifying Match: The Cat vs. Kronik

Cat says they should be getting together to fight Russo and company. Clark agrees and goes after Jeff, leaving Cat to roll Adams up for two. The beatdown is on but Cat drops to the floor to save Ms. Jones from Jarrett. Kronik pulls Cat back inside for High Times and the pin in less than a minute and a half. So Kronik is in the match instead.

Russo and Steiner are thrilled by the result……until it’s announced that Kronik advances instead. YOU MADE THE MATCH AND YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW THE RULES??? You can’t make this stuff up.

WarGames Qualifying Match: Shane Douglas vs. Goldberg

Torrie, really not very good on the mic yet, yells about being stuck in Dallas for the night. Shane gets shoved down to start and a quick legbar sends him out to the floor. Goldberg fires off a forearm but hits the post instead of Shane, giving Douglas a target. Back in and Shane works on a wristlock which goes as well as you would expect it to go. A clothesline with the bar arm drops Shane (no selling of course) and here are the Thrillers. They’re beaten down just as quickly with Reno taking a Roll the Dice. Douglas loads up the chain but gets speared down to set up the Jackhammer for the pin.

Rating: D. For an evil genius, Russo does some really stupid stuff. With that win, Goldberg is in the cage and can beat on Russo, all because of Russo’s doing. The match itself was as good as Shane Douglas vs. Goldberg in an overbooked match was going to be though at least we could look at Torrie.

Russo panics because he doesn’t think thinks through. Nash tells him he has an agenda tonight and Russo is foiled again.

Major Gunns is swimming for her final test to become Canadian. Well they might have been too subtle earlier so just put her in a swimsuit and be done with it. The Misfits are watching with binoculars from all of twenty feet away. Pamela Paulshock is thrown in as well so here are the Misfits to fight the Canadians in the pool.

Russo puts Vito in a gauntlet match against the Thrillers. That’s their final chance.

Arn Anderson is asked about whether he’ll show up for David’s wedding next week. After saying Pamela looks good soaking wet (he has a point), he wonders why someone like David would want to get married anyway. It’s in Horsemen country though so sure they’ll show up. The fact that the only thing they build up for weeks is likely another chance to humiliate Ric Flair is very telling about WCW.

Big Vito vs. Natural Born Thrillers

Vito says he doesn’t sweat anyone so bring it on. The Thrillers do their catchphrases so Vito turns it into gay jokes. After even more filler yelling at each other, Sanders says the five of them (there are six) will fight at the same time. Vito fights with the stick ball bat for as long as he can until Jindrak and O’Haire kick him in the face. The beating is on as you would expect and it’s a parade of finishers, capped off with the Seanton Bomb for the easy pin.

The Thrillers beat him down even more post match.

The teams have meetings in the back.

The good guys, minus Goldberg, are ready.

WCW World Title: WarGames 2000: Vince Russo/Kevin Nash/Scott Steiner/Jeff Jarrett vs. Sting/Kronik/Booker T./Goldberg

Nash is defending and the teams are only a thing for the timed interval (two minutes) entrances. The match can end at anytime and it’s Jarrett vs. Sting to start. They fight on the floor next to the ladder (needed to climb to the second cage) before throwing the ladder inside. Sting sends him into the ladder and it’s Scott Steiner in because the heels won the coin toss. Wait didn’t Russo say his team was the babyface team? So officially, the faces won the coin toss? Leave it to Russo to screw up the easiest idea in wrestling (which I believe he did in TNA’s Lethal Lockdown match as well).

Steiner hits Sting in the ribs to take over and brings in a bigger ladder but stops to beat on Sting even more. Kronik, meaning both of them, come in to “even” things up. Steiner heads up to the second cage, leaving Jarrett to take High Times, allowing Kronik to follow Steiner up top. A double gorilla press drops Steiner as the question becomes if Adams or Clark wins the title for themselves since they entered the match as a unit.

Russo comes in next but has the Harris Brothers climb the Cell and go inside the second cage after Kronik. As you might expect, Sting beats Russo down with ease and puts him in the Scorpion (of course Russo never taps). Now it’s Nash coming in as the heel/face order is thrown out. Nash goes after everyone and grabs Russo (standing with no issues after being in the Scorpion) by the throat but Steiner breaks it up. The Harris Brothers and Kronik are brawling in the crowd, apparently with Kronik having been eliminated. In WarGames.

Now Steiner breaks up Nash’s choke on Jarrett as Booker comes in. Booker ax kicks Steiner so Russo hits him from behind like a moron, earning himself an ax kick to the helmet. Yeah he’s wearing a helmet. Nash decks Booker and everyone still in the match is in the bottom cage. The heels all beat down Booker and Sting until Goldberg comes out to complete the field. Jarrett and Steiner take the bullets for Russo, leaving him to hit Goldberg in the back with the ball bat to drop Goldberg.

Booker goes up top for the belt (Yeah remember that?) as Nash stands next to the door. Well that’s smart, even though you could conceivably just climb down the side of the cage to get to the floor. Somewhere in there Goldberg was handcuffed to the corner. You would think they would have pointed that out earlier. Sting, Jarrett and Steiner go up to the second cage, leaving Booker to go up and get the belt. Booker starts hitting people with the belt to get down but Sting has been handcuffed to the weapons cage, allowing Steiner to take the belt away from Booker and blast him in the face.

Madden admits there are no teams in this mess as the belt falls through the hole. Russo picks it up and taunts Goldberg, allowing the Cat to come in and kick Russo in the head. Nash lays out Cat with a Jackknife but Goldberg breaks the handcuffs and cleans house. He picks up the belt and goes to leave but Bret Hart appears and slams the door on his face. Russo has the belt free and clear until Nash grabs him by the shirt. They hug, it was a swerve, and Nash retains.

Rating: D+. Let’s get this out of the way to start: this wasn’t WarGames. Russo can call it that all he wants but this had as much to do with WarGames as the set of collectable plates that McDonalds put out in 1998 to promote Hercules. This was a big cage match with timed intervals and that’s about it for WarGames connections.

That being said, the match was enough of a mess that it wasn’t boring and at least presented something that could be interesting if someone competent was booking the thing. It would have been a lot better if it had been just going up and getting the belt without having to get back down but you knew Nash wasn’t going up that high. It’s total insanity of course, but were you expecting anything else?

Here’s the thing though: it’s a huge waste of time. Think about it: this match was announced last Wednesday, had its main story set up earlier in the night, and the match happened tonight. Nothing changes in the storylines, Nash is still facing Booker at the pay per view, and it was all a big swerve for a few hours. At least it was memorable though, which is Russo’s definition of good.

Overall Rating: D. The main event helped a bit but an hour and a half of nothing matches before the main event isn’t the best idea with one more Nitro before the pay per view. However, I’d rather watch a somewhat interesting one off show than the traditional insanity that I have to put up with when they try to do multiple storylines. On a sidenote: where was Mike Awesome? He was part of the team on Thunder and I don’t think he was even mentioned here. That’s probably best for him actually.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder – August 30, 2000: It’s A Good Show

Thunder
Date: August 30, 2000
Location: Tuscon Convention Center, Tuscon, Arizona
Commentators: Stevie Ray, Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay

This is another case where just getting up to a coherent show would be a huge improvement over what they had on Monday. Thunder isn’t usually the best show in the world but at least it has a tendency to make sense. Nash is the World Champion now, which could actually work if he puts Booker over at the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap from Nitro. Normally editing things down to a few minutes works but in this case, the show is still a disaster.

Here’s Team Canada with the captured Major Gunns in the ring. Elix Skipper says “Show me the Canadian money!” Gunns has to hold the flag and rolls her eyes throughout Storm’s speech about how we all want to be Canadians. The Canadian national anthem plays so Gunns drops the flag and rips her top off to reveal an American flag bra. Cue Team Canada’s opponents.

Team Canada vs. Kronik

Storm is sent to the floor and Adams launches Skipper down on top of him. We settle down with Clark stomping away at Skipper in the corner. Tony promises the announcement of a first time ever match this coming Monday on Nitro. A double shoulder drops Skipper and he dives backwards into a full nelson slam, only to have Storm springboard in with a clothesline for two. Tony: “One, two, HE ALMOST BEAT HIM!” Yeah because the US Champion getting a pin would be shocking.

Adams clotheslines both guys down and brings in Clark for the Meltdown on Skipper for two. Storm breaks up High Times and goes for the flag, only to have Gunns jab him between the legs. The full nelson slam and High Times puts Storm away, because why not pin the US Champion in a nothing match?

Rating: C-. Not the worst power vs. speed match as I could watch Storm being that smooth in the ring all day. The guy just looks natural flying around at a level that almost no one else reaches. I didn’t like the ending but at least the match leading up to it was good enough and we’re off to a nice start.

Post match here’s General Rection comes down to try to save Gunns but the Canadians fight back, drawing out the rest of the Misfits for the save. The Canadians get away with Gunns.

The Natural Born Thrillers are ready for a limo but it’s Nash and Steiner. The new champ wants to have fun tonight “and that’s a shoot.”

We see a clip of the Thunder Tailgate Party. Ignore Vito still wearing the Hardcore Title, making this a month old at least.

Here are Steiner, Jarrett, Nash and the Thrillers (you knew the mega heel stable was coming) with Scott going first. Apparently he isn’t allowed to call Goldberg all the names he wants because the corporate sponsors won’t let him. Some villain. He got hit in the face with a pipe on Monday and has the banged up eyes to prove it. After Steiner swears a bit (that’s more like it), he promises to take care of Goldberg at Fall Brawl.

Nash talks about winning the World Title for the fifth time on Monday. Stevie: “And no one remembers the first four.” Well to be fair those, three of those reigns combined to last about two weeks. He’s watched the tape back a few times and sees why Jarrett played it so fair during the match: Jeff wanted Nash to win the title on his own, because Nash wanted to do it for the people. Gee I just thought it was bad writing.

The fans actually cheer the line (save for Daffney and the Crowbar look-a-like, who are in the audience for some reason) and Nash chuckles. All that means is more people willing to pay another $30 at an autograph signing because their picture has the belt in it. Nash touts the Thrillers as the future and says Goldberg is out in the desert so there’s no one to stop them tonight.

Cue Booker to say he has a clique of his own, so here are Vito, Awesome and the Filthy Animals. So the clique known as the Animals are part of an even bigger clique? You think you might be overdoing this faction war stuff? Booker is worried about the guys in the ring taking over WCW and the fight is on until security makes the save.

A few notes here. First, I don’t really see why this is a problem since we’ve established that Cat is more powerful than Russo. Second, this was actually a well done segment with the storyline being laid out right in front of us. That’s one area where Russo excels: he can set up a big story really, really well.

Unfortunately that brings us to the third point: we’re going to have to see where this goes and that’s Russo’s downfall. He can set stuff up but at some point he has to execute those stories and the whole thing collapses. On top of that, if you’ve seen one Russo faction war story, you’ve seen them all. Thankfully this one is off to a good start though and you have to take the little things while you can. Oh and ignore the setup having plot holes the size of Russo’s MANLY biceps of course.

Back from a break and we see Nash taking over the control booth during the commercial. Apparently he’s in charge now and sends Reno to face Mike Awesome.

Rection wants Storm at Fall Brawl. For AMERICA. And Gunns.

Wedding invitation for a week from Monday.

Reno vs. Mike Awesome

Awesome is in ring gear here, which really makes me wonder why the 70s thing existed. He doesn’t wear the stuff to the ring and wrestles the same so why do it other than to amuse the writers? Awesome elbows him in the face to start and throws him down with a German suplex for no cover.

The slingshot shoulder gets two for Mike and we hear about War Games 2000 airing this Monday on Nitro, meaning it’s the first time ever both A, on TV and B, for the World Title. Thanks for giving us a full FIVE DAYS notice for this huge match. Reno gets in a shot to the ribs but stops to go after Daffney’s boyfriend (Ozzie) for no apparent reason. Stevie: “How did they get front row seats in this venue?” Back in and Mike grabs the Awesome Bomb for a quick pin. Stevie: “BUT HOW DID THEY GET THE SEATS TONY???”

Rating: D+. Another match that didn’t have enough time to go anywhere and the Ozzie stuff didn’t make much sense. Reno is yet another guy with a great look who could have been something if he was given the chance. Awesome did his usual but he was really just a warm body here, which is yet another waste of talent.

Reno beats up Ozzie and Daffney throws popcorn.

During the break, Jarrett jumped Awesome until Jimmy Hart and Finlay of all people broke it up. I like this attacks during the break stuff. There’s something so fake about having nothing happen until we’re back from a commercial.

This week’s sitdown interview is with Paul Orndorff earlier today in the empty arena. Tony asks about Orndorff being in charge of the Power Plant. Paul calls the students his kids and he’s so proud of all of them. The Power Plant is brutal but he’s looking for the best of the best (I guess Batista isn’t considered that great).

Orndorff keeps the students working hard and has them clean the place because they need to learn that no one is above anything. Tony brings up the Natural Born Thrillers having no respect for Orndorff and claiming that it was their talent that got them here. Mike Sanders called Orndorff a miserable old man and that’s more than enough for Paul.

It’s time for an old school rant with Paul talking about how these kids are ungrateful and how they were nothing before he got hold of them. Tony keeps egging him on by saying how often the Thrillers talk like this and you can see Orndorff getting madder and madder because this is what he gets every time he tries to help someone. Really good stuff from Orndorff here as he gets the role perfectly and nailed it, as most old school guys can.

Back live and here are the Thrillers with signs about Orndorff, including “Your best match was against Vader” and “Aren’t you dead yet?” The signs are turned around to spell out WE RULE.

Steiner hits Reno with a pipe for losing.

Booker says his knee is fine and he’s ready for Mike Sanders tonight.

Tag Team Titles: Rey Mysterio/Juventud Guerrera vs. Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak

Jindrak and O’Haire are challenging, as ordered by Nash and company. Before we get started, O’Haire says we’ll make it fair by letting Disqo be on the team. Or we could just have a tag match but that might make too much sense. Konnan sits in on commentary. O’Haire slams Disqo down to start and hits that sweet springboard clothesline of his. Disqo gets in a few shots and wisely brings in Juvy for some quick legdrops.

Off to Rey for the Bronco Buster but he dives into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. It’s off to Jindrak who gets two off a clothesline, followed by a nice Torture Rack neckbreaker for two more. Mark misses a dropkick though and it’s off to Juvy for some dropkicks of his own. In the melee, O’Haire gets in a quick tag, allowing Jindrak to throw Juvy into the air for a powerslam from Sean.

Juvy rolls to the floor so Sean hiptosses him over the top and back inside. There’s something awesome about small people being thrown around like that. Back in and the hot tag brings in Rey as everything breaks down. O’Haire kicks Disqo in the face but Juvy breaks up the Seanton Bomb and pulls Sean down with a hurricanrana. A quick Rey legdrop between the legs retains the titles.

Rating: B-. Now this is how you do the power vs. speed formula. This worked really well back and forth, even if the idea of the champions having the advantage goes completely against face/heel psychology. Jindrak and O’Haire’s good looking tandem stuff makes up for it though, along with Juvy and Rey bumping like pinballs.

Mike Sanders gets Booker T. tonight. Jarrett comes in and says he’s booked himself in a match that could end his career. Just give us the comedy reveal already.

Steiner attacks Jindrak and O’Haire as well.

Mike Sanders vs. Booker T.

Sanders tells Booker to bring it so here’s a livid Mr. T. Booker drops him with an early clothesline and hammers away with right hands in the corner. The ax kick, side kick and Book End put Sanders away in barely a minute.

Post break Booker is limping and Sanders gets beaten down as well.

Jarrett is getting his blood pressure checked before his big intimidating match.

Big Vito vs. Chuck Palumbo

This is the result of a Vito challenge. They trade early slams for two until Vito grabs a suplex and drops the top rope elbow. The top rope headbutt misses though and Palumbo hits a nice top rope shoulder for two of his own. Not that it matters as Vito hits him in the ribs and scores with the implant DDT for another quick win. So much for Nash’s boys being, you know, good.

Steiner beats up Palumbo as well. Good for him as Palumbo should be able to last two minutes against Big Vito.

Harris Twins vs. Misfits in Action

AWOL/Rection here. It’s a big fight to start as is almost always the custom in tag matches around here. The Misfits take over with AWOL working over we’ll say Don as things settle down. Since that’s too calm for WCW, here’s Storm with Major Gunns for a distraction. AWOL goes through a table because what else is he supposed to do. The H Bomb is broken up by Rection, who loads up No Laughing Matter, only to have Skipper come out and hit him with the flag. Isn’t that disrespecting the Maple Leaf? We’re still not done though as Kronik comes in for High Times on Ron, setting up No Laughing Matter for the pin.

Rating: D. Well you knew something like this was coming. Who in the world thought we needed five people running in and a weapon shot on a quick TV match? The Misfits are another team that could go somewhere if there weren’t so many factions on the show that take up space. We’re currently at seven stables and counting (Misfits, Thrillers, Team Canada, Nash’s group, Booker’s group, Filthy Animals, Dark Carnival) so how exactly are the Misfits supposed to stand out?

AWOL saves Rection from Storm.

Leia Meow whips the Dragons for losing so much. If they don’t get better, they have to lick her boots. Ok then.

Steiner and Nash interrupt Jarrett at prayer and offer to have his back out there tonight. Jarrett has to do this himself.

Jeff Jarrett vs. ???

It’s Kwee Wee. There’s nothing else to say here and if you’ve ever watched wrestling before, you knew a swerve was coming the whole way. Jarrett jumps him at the bell as Paisley sits in on commentary. Kwee Wee gets slugged down as Stevie talks about keeping his yaks intact. A hiptoss and back elbow put Jarrett down but he sidesteps a missile dropkick.

Jeff loads up the Stroke but throws him down when Mike Awesome comes out for a distraction. A quick rollup gets two on Jeff but the referee gets rid of Awesome, allowing Jeff to….do nothing. Kwee Wee tries what looks like a powerbomb but drops Jarrett for two instead. The Stroke wraps it up pretty quick.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as you could see the joke from the second they announced this in the first place. At least in this case they weren’t really trying to hide it which makes this a lot easier to sit through. Nash and Steiner playing along helped and at least the match was short enough.

Here’s Shawn Stasiak for an arm wrestling challenge. As you might expect, here’s Orndorff to answer as well as scare Stasiak half to death. Paul almost has it won but then punches Shawn in the face like a ticked off veteran should. There’s a piledriver for Stasiak before Orndorff grabs a chair and fights off the rest of the Thrillers. This REALLY hasn’t been their night but Orndorff is already better than most of the people on this show.

Cat and Ms. Jones get here.

Here’s Cat in the arena to call out Nash, who works for Russo who works for Cat. Therefore it’s time for Cat vs. Nash….which doesn’t actually start as Cat has to beat up Steiner and Jarrett. Nash comes in with a ball bat because THE CAT is just so tough. Jones tries to slap Jeff but gets guitared, which finally draws out Booker to help. The Thrillers come out and keep the beating going to end the show. I have no idea why the Animals, Awesome or Vito didn’t come out to help but that’s continuity for you.

Overall Rating: B-. This was the best Thunder in probably a year at least. Well at least the first half was as the rest turned into another goofy mess. The key thing here is they toned down all the ridiculous insanity and just told their big story with wrestling matches. That’s one of the things that drives me craziest about Russo: there’s good(ish) stuff buried deep under the mess, but there’s so much bad to get through that it’s hard to keep trying. Still though, awesome first hour this week and not a bad enough second hour to kill it.

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Monday Nitro – August 28, 2000: It Raises So Many Questions

Monday Nitro #255
Date: August 28, 2016
Location: Pan American Center, Las Cruces, New Mexico
Attendance: 4,588
Commentators: Mark Madden, Tony Schiavone

I’m sitting here trying to write an introduction for this show and I honestly can’t remember anything from the last two shows. I watched Nitro a week ago and Thunder three days ago and I have no idea what happened. The big matches are Booker T. vs. Kevin Nash and Scott Steiner vs. Goldberg, but none of the details or any of the other details are coming to me. So little of this has any staying power whatsoever and feels like they’re flying from story to story with nothing in between. Let’s get to it.

We actually open with an NWO video. As in the Outsiders/Jarrett/Hart. Why in the world is this airing and why do I have a chill running up my spine at the possibilities?

Scott Steiner, Kevin Nash, Jeff Jarrett and Vince Russo get out of a limo.

Dark Carnival vs. 3 Count

It’s Vampiro and the Clowns here, leaving Muta of all people to do commentary. This goes as well as you would expect it to as Madden “translates”. The band dives onto the Carnival a few times to take over I’m pretty sure Muta’s voice is overdubbed here and you can almost feel the racial overtones from here. The Clowns are knocked to the floor and a double suplex drops Vampiro. Muta screams for some reason and Tony asks Mark what he said. Madden: “He said AAAHHHHHH!!!!” Back in and Vampiro hits a Nail in the Coffin to Moore, setting up a guillotine foot drop from Shaggy for the pin.

Post match Tank Abbott comes out to destroy 3 Count. The Carnival and 3 Count beat Tank down until Demon makes the save. Muta gets in with the mist to Demon, only to have Sting come out for the real save. That would be three people running in, mist and a ball bat as fallout from a 2:40 match. Sting, Tank and Demon pose in a very odd visual.

Here are Russo, Nash, Jarrett, Steiner and the Natural Born Thrillers with something to say, though I have a feeling Nash and Russo will do most of the talking. Russo tells us to cheer him because this is the elite group of WCW. Wasn’t this the same group that wanted to kill each other at New Blood Rising? Now the Band is back together and Goldberg is in trouble. All Goldberg had to do was sign his release but now it’s going to become New York ugly.

Jarrett says he has all the stroke around here no one can touch them. Some of the people here might find it odd that Nash is back on the team. However, Jarrett wants to talk about something personal, like Mike Awesome. Mike cost him the US Title last week so Jarrett wants him in a Bunkhouse Brawl at Fall Brawl. Steiner got his revenge last week and Goldberg found out what payback was. He could walk backwards and look better than Goldberg’s girlfriend and that’s about it.

Nash says he should have called himself the Puppet Master instead of Big Sexy. Every few months he suckers people in so they’ll buy his merchandise but now that it’s all sold out, you get the real him. He doesn’t care about any of the fans and he never will. The people can’t get him title shots or watch his back but the people in this ring certainly can. The fans start chanting for Booker but Nash promises to take the title in Buffalo at Fall Brawl. Russo says not so fast though because Nash isn’t getting the title shot at the pay per view. Instead, he’s getting the shot tonight with Jarrett as referee and Steiner as outside enforcer.

Cue Booker to tell Nash to shut up and to tell Russo to pick a buddy to get beaten up. This brings out the Cat and Ms. Jones with the former wanting his karate gi to give someone else a beating. The Thrillers let the two of them walk by and Cat gets in the ring to tell Russo to get out of town because he’s not the boss. Nash and company beat Cat and Booker down so here are the Filthy Animals to go after the Thrillers.

They get through the line and are destroyed by the big names as well before Russo and company go up the ramp. Goldberg appears on screen in the desert, digging a hole. He promises to come back tonight and take care of all the goons though before bringing Russo to the desert and burying him in the sand. In other words, Russo is next.

Let’s pause here for a second and recap. Here’s a list of people involved in the first segment:

3 Count (Karagias, Moore, Helms)

Dark Carnival (Vampiro, Muta, Insane Clown Posse)

Tank Abbott

Sting

Demon

Here’s a list of people involved in the second segment:

Vince Russo

Kevin Nash

Jeff Jarrett

Scott Steiner

Natural Born Thrillers (Reno, Sanders, Jindrak, Stasiak, O’Haire, Palumbo)

Booker T.

Ms. Jones

The Cat

Filthy Animals (Konnan, Juvy, Mysterio, Disqo)

Goldberg

To recap, TWENTY EIGHT PEOPLE were involved in the first two segments. We’re not even a fourth of the way into this show and we’ve nearly had enough people to run a Royal Rumble. You think they might be overdoing it a little bit???

Cat is taken away in an ambulance.

Russo tells his buddies to keep an eye on him because Goldberg might bury him alive. Jarrett has someone coming in to deal with Goldberg while they get ready for later. So in other words, Russo and Goldberg is the big story instead of the World Title. Raise your hand if you’re surprised. Goldberg calls Russo (thank goodness he knew his number and could get to a phone in the desert) and says he’s on his way.

Tygress vs. Major Gunns vs. Paisley

Paisley kicks Gunns in the back and leaves as Tygress rolls her up for the pin in 20 seconds. The referee says it was only a two so Paisley and Tygress beat Gunns up even more before leaving with no cover. I don’t even know how to call this stupid.

The Animals beat up the Thrillers and Konnan makes fun of Russo. So yeah, again it’s all about Russo.

Jarrett has a truck full of guitars. Ok that’s actually funny.

Mike Awesome is now a fan of the 1970s. I knew this was coming and it really doesn’t help. He just came in for an interview and is wearing a blue leisure suit with disco playing in the background. Awesome wants Rick Steiner in a Bunkhouse Brawl as a warmup later tonight.

Kronik vs. Harris Twins

This is a House of Pain match, meaning a cage where you have to handcuff your opponents to the cage wall, because that makes sense. It’s a slugout to start with the camera jumping around way too often. Clark suplexes Ron and drops a middle rope elbow and Adams plants Ron with a full nelson slam. With enough wrestling having been done so far, Adams throws Ron through the cage wall and they brawl on the floor with Don beating up a fan for no apparent reason. The match, a cage match, is thrown out in less than two and a half minutes.

Preview of The Way of the Gun, an upcoming movie.

Here’s Team Canada to issue a challenge to MIA for a Prisoner of War match. In other words, the winner gets to kidnap a member of the other team and keep them for an undisclosed period of time. Cue the MIA, with Rection saying their name now stands for Made in America. The match is on, as long as it can be a tables match.

Lance Storm vs. Sgt. AWOL

Non-title. AWOL takes him down to start and they’re quickly on the floor with Storm getting kicked in the face. Storm gets back in and Skipper hits AWOL with the flag, allowing Storm to dropkick AWOL off the apron and through the table.

Storm grabs Gunns and bails.

Sting (with the announcers being heard off camera) accepts Muta’s challenge. When did he make that challenge?

Mike Awesome vs. Rick Steiner

Bunkhouse Brawl, meaning no holds barred. Thankfully Awesome is in his regular gear here. Steiner jumps him to start but Mike clotheslines him to the floor and hits a big old dive over the top. Awesome throws in a table but Jeff Jarrett runs in with a pipe, allowing Steiner to German suplex Awesome through the table for the pin.

Ok, stop for a second. To recap, we’ve just finished our fifth match, which has consisted of a six man tag, a triple threat, a gimmick cage match, a tables match and a hardcore match. Total match time: 8:23. That should be the first hour and a half of a pay per view and we haven’t even had nine minutes of action. How in the world did we get here?

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Kevin Nash

Booker is defending, Russo is on commentary, Jarrett is inside referee and Steiner is outside referee. This is your first half main event, meaning that indeed, this show is more about Goldberg and Russo. Nash kicks him in the face to start and they head to the floor with Jarrett actually counting them both out.

Russo is off commentary to yell at Jarrett for throwing Booker back inside, only to have Jeff shove him back to the booth. Back in and Booker hammers away in the corner as Jeff seems to be calling it down the middle. I’m sure that’s going to last until the end of the match too. Nash drops the champ with a clothesline for two. Russo freaks out as Steiner hits Booker in the back, sending Jarrett outside while Nash covers Booker. Jeff shoves Russo as Nash slowly beats on Booker with Russo threatening to fire the referee.

There’s a superkick to Nash, followed by the side kick for no cover. The ax kick sets up the Spinarooni and the missile dropkick. Steiner comes back and we hear the production team doing an audio test. Of course we do. Booker drops Steiner but Jeff hits the champ with a guitar because we needed a swerve of a group set up twenty minutes ago in a seven and a half minute match. Nash gets up and Jackknifes Booker for the pin and his fifth title.

Rating: D-. This is a classic case of WHAT WAS THE POINT. Like I said, the group was announced maybe half an hour ago at most but we had a swerve, teasing issues between them. Then they get to say it’s all a swerve and laugh after Russo acted all freaked out for about three minutes. Again I ask: what was the point? I’m sure it’s more of Russo’s brilliant writing that went over my head, which happens way too often on these shows. Just let the fix be in from the start next time and stop making things complicated.

Tony: “This is the worst thing to ever happen to the WCW World Title. And we’ve seen a lot of bad things happen to it.”

Russo and company celebrate but they still need to worry about Goldberg.

Booker leaves as Goldberg arrives, which gets him to stick around.

Shane Douglas and Torrie Wilson are in the crowd with Shane saying he left Kidman alive at New Blood Rising. That’s not a mistake he’ll make again because he wants a scaffold match at Fall Brawl. Of course he does. Cue Crowbar to go after Shane for whatever reason but Daffney is down under the balcony for an unintentional distraction, allowing Shane to throw Crowbar off the balcony and through a well placed table.

Shane goes down after him and shoves Daffney (there’s your required violence against a woman) before heading to the ring with Torrie. That was just a warmup so if there’s a man who wants to give him a real test, come out here now. Cue Goldberg to dispatch Shane with the usual. So we have a match set up, a random Crowbar appearance, a big bump to likely write Crowbar off TV, a woman being shoved, and Goldberg destroying Shane so no one remembers what Shane did. This show makes me need oxygen.

Nash goes into the shower (complete with the censored stuff) but Booker jumps him from behind.

Russo panics so Steiner goes to deal with Goldberg. Why doesn’t Russo go with him?

We get a wedding invitation from David Flair and Miss Hancock (in Charlotte) for two weeks from tonight.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Big Vito

Madden makes Italian jokes and Tony talks about Russo as Vito powerslams Jeff for two. A loud right hand drops Jeff again but Jarrett comes back with some right hands of his own. There’s the Mafia Kick and a legdrop for two on Jarrett as Vito continues to be far more adequate in the ring than you would expect him to be. A top rope elbow gets two more on Jarrett as Madden is freaking out. Jeff’s enziguri looks to set up the Stroke but Vito counters with a good looking belly to back. Vito drops a top rope headbutt for two more but the Big Vito Special (Impaler) is countered into the Stroke for the clean pin.

Rating: C. Write this down because I don’t think there’s going to be another clean finish in this company for probably weeks. This worked far better than it had any right to be with Vito more than hanging in there against the more talented Jarrett. Like so many people on the roster though, Vito can do as much as he wants but with this basic of a gimmick, the glass ceiling is going to leave one heck of a bump on the back of his head.

Jarrett goes outside to get more guitars but Mike Awesome is waiting under the pile and takes Jeff out. Again, that was clever.

Natural Born Thrillers vs. Filthy Animals

This is a ten person elimination tag with Stasiak as the odd man out and Tygress in the ring for the Animals. Palumbo and Guerrera get things going with Juvy kicking at the legs and taking him over with a nice suplex. Juvy tries to go up but gets caught in midair for a fall away slam. Stasiak brings up Paul Orndorff as their trainer but doesn’t seem to think too much of him. Reno comes in to pound on Mysterio but it’s quickly back to Juvy to counter a powerbomb, allowing Rey to drop a springboard legdrop. A suplex puts Rey down and Jindrak comes in for a no hands Lionsault.

Kidman comes in but eats a tilt-a-whirl slam….which he doesn’t quite sell as he pops up with a Chartbuster. The hot tag brings in Konnan to clean house as everything breaks down with a bunch of people fighting to the floor for an eight man countout. We’re down to Sanders vs. Tygress with the latter knocking Mike into the corner for a Bronco Buster. That goes nowhere and the 3.0 gives Mike the easy pin.

Rating: D. Well it was fun while it lasted, or at least the first three minutes or so before we had to get to the trick to get out of having a match go on forever. On top of that, we had another woman getting beaten up by a man so everyone wins. This was another good idea that had to be rushed through because Russo is a nitwit.

Goldberg lays out Scott Steiner.

Russo is looking for any protection he can find (because just LEAVING is out of the question) and runs into Vito. After a quick apology from Russo, Vito gives him the kiss of death.

Here’s Russo in the arena because that’s the best place he could hide. Vito actually comes out with him and you can see the swerve coming from here. What swerve? No idea but you know one is coming. Russo is all MANLY again and calls out Goldberg because this is Russo’s house and these are Russo’s people.

Cue Goldberg as Russo KEEPS TALKING, saying that Goldberg can’t touch him. Wait….he’s been running scared all night and NOW he remembers that??? Tony: “This is real life fans.” Vito blasts Russo with the stick ball bat and stomps away. Goldberg throws Vito something (keys maybe) and tells Vito to take out the garbage. Vito carries Russo off, presumably out to the grave in the desert. I’m sure Goldberg and Vito, great pals of course, talked about where it was and that Vito has a good knowledge of the New Mexico desert’s geography.

Sting vs. Great Muta

They start fighting in the aisle before the bell and we’re not going to have a match are we? Sting takes over and hits Muta with a chair, only to get kicked back. Since this hasn’t gone on long enough, Vampiro and the Clowns cut through the video screen so Vampiro can dive off and hit Sting with a kendo stick. I guess walking out was too passe. Sting fights back and they climb onto the screen. The Clowns pull him through the hole in the screen and pound him down for way longer than this needed to go.

We cut to the desert with Bret Hart of all people getting out of a car to say he hates Russo more than anyone. Bret says he’s never forgotten Montreal and he wants to help bury Russo. Goldberg, like an idiot, agrees, and hands Bret a shovel. Bret blasts Goldberg in the back with said shovel and yells about Goldberg ending his career to end the show.

Overall Rating: F. Vince Russo has lost his mind. Like, moreso than usual. This was one of those rare episodes where you sit in awe watching, not sure how to react to anything. I’m sitting here trying to come up with something to say about this show but between all those gimmick matches rolled up into one show and Russo playing the high school scream queen running away from Goldberg the slasher to THE ASSAULT IN THE DESERT (how did Hart know they were there?), I really have no idea how to talk about this.

The worst part though: this show ran unopposed. The night before, the WWF had Summerslam 2000 (Rock vs. HHH vs. Angle, Benoit vs. Jericho in a 2/3 falls match and the first ever TLC) but Raw was preempted by a dog show. Therefore, you had a hot wrestling audience with zero competition (Monday Night Football started in a week) and this is what WCW gave them.

Earlier tonight, I watched JBL interview the Road Dogg on the WWE Network. Russo was brought up with JBL mentioning the theory that Russo was sent to WCW to ruin the company. I’ve never bought that theory but if you watch a show like this, it’s really hard to believe that McMahon fought very hard to keep Russo. He had to know that Russo was insane and wanted to do stuff like this, but my goodness there was no way anyone knew it could be this bad. This is one of those shows you need to see for yourselves as it’s one of the biggest head trips that I’ve ever seen.

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Thunder – August 23, 2000: Everybody Hates Disco

Thunder
Date: August 23, 2000
Location: Tulsa Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Attendance: 2,811
Commentators: Stevie Ray, Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone

We’re coming up on Fall Brawl with Nash vs. Booker T. for the title in a match that actually makes sense on paper. They’re making Booker out to be a giant killer so a win over Nash should be a good thing for his run. Now of course that brings up the issue of Nash ever doing what makes sense for the company as I’m sure Goldberg can tell you about. Let’s get to it.

Chuck Palumbo comes into Cat’s office and wants to be in the main event. That’s exactly what he gets, as part of a tag match with Kevin Nash against Booker T. and whoever Booker can find (this company LOVES itself some mystery partners). Well at least they’re doing something with one of the new guys so points for that. Ms. Jones leaves, saying she has to take care of something.

Kwee Wee vs. Corporal Cajun

Paisley sits in on commentary because managing doesn’t mean anything anymore. Cajun gets in some right hands and a dropkick to start but dives into a powerbomb as Kwee Wee’s offense continues to surprise. A slam (ok so he’s not always great) gets two and it’s off to a camel clutch as Kwee Wee (I can’t bring myself to use either half of his name) is showing some thinking by working on the back. That goes nowhere and Kwee Wee misses a middle rope legdrop to give Cajun a breather.

Back up and the Corporal does his stupid dancing punches to send Kwee Wee outside. After the Misfits take a chair away, Kwee Wee heads back inside, only to be backdropped right back to the floor. Cajun whips him into the barricade and gets slapped by Paisley for his efforts. Tony: “I’m with you girl.” Back in and Cajun gets two off a belly to belly but his headscissors is countered into a faceplant (think Dalton Castle’s Bang A Rang if you’re an ROH fan) for the quick pin.

Rating: C. Leave it to WCW to put one of their better young talents with a gimmick that is going to destroy his career. Kwee Wee has been a very nice surprise since he debuted a few weeks back and he’s actually making it work in the ring as well. This youth movement is going somewhere and it’s nice to see for a change.

Post match Paisley and Gunns get in a brawl because they’re women in 2000 WCW and that’s all they know how to do.

Back from a break with Paisley and Gunns still fighting until they challenge each other for later.

Ms. Jones comes up to Team Canada and makes Storm vs. Rection vs. Awesome for the US Title tonight. Storm isn’t pleased but it goes nowhere.

Here are the Natural Born Thrillers with something to say, starting with Sanders getting in his athletically stacked and genetically jacked lines. They were THIS close to winning the World and Tag Team Titles on Monday but various things got in the way. Cue the Filthy Animals with Konnan making a lot of jokes that are quickly censored. Some hero. Disqo wants Sanders tonight but before we can get an answer, Vito runs in and beats the Thrillers down with his stick ball bat. The Thrillers fight back because it’s just a stick but the Animals come in and clear them out.

Booker goes to see how Vito is and winds up getting him as a partner in the main event. That’s quite the jump up for Vito.

Sanders (in a different shirt than he was wearing in the ring because WCW’s production staff sucks) comes in to see Cat and wants a match with Disqo’s career on the line. He even gets all evil by insulting James Brown. That’s enough for Cat, but he can’t put Disqo’s career on the line because of his contract. Then what was the point of this?

Crowbar has candy and flowers for Daffney, but it turns out that she already went out with her secret admirer last night. Of course she can’t actually tell Crowbar what his name is but he’ll be here later. Crowbar caves in and says the flowers and candy were from the admirer. Again, this works way too well for what they’re doing.

Harris Twins vs. Jung Dragons

So yeah, after nearly killing themselves in that ladder match, this is the Dragons’ reward. That sums up WCW so well and it’s really sad to see. Ron no sells Yang’s dropkick to start so Kaz comes in with a kick off the top to actually stagger the twin. That’s about it though as Ron kicks Jamie-san in the face and it’s a double H-Bomb for the pin on Yang. I’m sure the Dragons will have another good cruiserweight match soon and look awesome and then this will happen all over again. It says a lot when hooking up with Nidia and becoming a redneck was a huge upgrade for Jamie Noble.

Post match Kaz takes another H-Bomb until Kronik comes out for the save. This brings out Leia Meow to yell at the Dragons and take them to the back.

Skipper says he has Storm’s back.

MI Smooth talks to Norman Smiley about their Hardcore Title match. For no apparent reason (save for it makes the joke work), it’s going to be I Quit so Norman can give up immediately and lose the title.

Crowbar vs. Reno

Daffney is all happy while Crowbar is depressed. Reno slugs away on him but Crowbar gets in some basic stuff, followed by a legdrop between the legs and a slingshot legdrop for two. Back up and Reno starts working on the arm, including lifting him up in an arm trap suplex. That earns Reno a jawbreaker as this is pretty back and forth so far. As the match is going on, Tony gets word that we’ll be having a wedding between David Flair and Miss Hancock on September 11. Oh geez I don’t want to know how bad this is going to get.

Reno gets low bridged to the floor but Crowbar flips over after him, only to hold on to the ropes so he can kick Reno in the head and then skin the cat. Well that was cool. A Vader Bomb off the barricade sets up a Lionsault back inside for two as the match is getting better. Naturally that means it’s time to go off the rails as Daffney freaks out because here’s her secret admirer…..who looks exactly like Crowbar. Daffney runs up and hugs him, distraction Crowbar so Reno can Roll the Dice for the pin.

Rating: C-. Of course. Instead of using one of the several dozen wrestlers on your roster, you bring in someone who looks like Crowbar because it’s funny or something. Either that or this is something that happened to Russo when he was a teenager and he needs to find a way to get it out of his system. Almost everything else involving a woman seems to be.

Crowbar gets beaten down until the look-a-like makes the save.

Nash tells Palumbo to take care of Vito and Booker.

Booker and Vito decide to take care of Nash and Palumbo.

Lieutenant Loco tries to get Disqo’s career on the line as well. I think we’ve got a running joke here.

Tank Abbott fires 3 Count but makes them his partners in an eight man tag tonight.

This week’s sitdown interview is with…..Midajah, who is in a neck brace after the attack by Goldberg last week. So this one is in character I guess? She got her start in fitness modeling but didn’t want to make her career by taking her clothes off in Playboy. Tenay says she’s a small woman in a man’s world but Midajah doesn’t want to hear it. Tenay: “Yeah I’ve heard it before. I am woman hear me roar right?”

Midajah talks about saving Tenay from Steiner’s attack a few weeks ago but Mike thinks she only did it to keep Steiner from being fined. That’s enough for Midajah as she calls Tenay a jerk and ends the interview. Tenay: “Good luck to you and your future in sports entertainment honey. You’re going to need it.” This really accomplished nothing, as I’m sure you expected. At least it didn’t make everyone feel stupid though so it’s getting better. Well that and making Tenay look like a jerk, which I’m sure makes him the face in this scene.

The Natural Born Thrillers jump Booker and Vito…..who easily fight them off with stick ball bats. These aren’t the brightest rookies.

Norman is really happy about getting to lose the title (why doesn’t he just vacate it?) when he runs into the Dark Carnival. Muta hits him in the throat and I’m sure you get the idea here.

3 Count/Tank Abbott vs. Dark Carnival

Before the match, Tank makes the three of them leave so he can sing a bit. Stevie doesn’t get the difference between a gigolo and a juggalo. Tank stands in a different corner than his partners as Shane is LAUNCHED across the ring with a release powerbomb. Vampiro kicks Evan in the face so Karagias sends him to the floor for a nice springboard plancha. Everything breaks down and the referee gets misted.

Tank is standing around watching all this happen as the Clowns double team Shannon with a Samoan drop into a guillotine legdrop. Now Tank comes in to start cleaning house, only to have 3 Count beat him down with baseball bats. Muta adds the moonsault for the pin. That’s it for Tank (at least in the ring) and I’m actually going to miss him. The guy is such a trainwreck that he’s fun to watch.

Skipper is on the phone with someone and says Awesome is in, meaning it’s going to be Rection against both of them tonight. Rection overhears.

Booker and Vito are ready for tonight.

Paisley challenges Gunns again. Did they forget already?

Hardcore Title: MI Smooth vs. Norman Smiley

Smiley is defending and this is an I Quit match. The bell rings and Norman lays down but can’t speak because of Muta hitting him in the throat. Smooth doesn’t get it and “hits” him with some stuff before actually hitting him with some stuff. Norman still can’t talk so Smooth pounds on him even more, only to have Smiley start fighting back out of self defense. A low blow with a kendo stick stops Smooth and Norman gets in his dancing, followed by a few trashcan shots. Smooth runs him over with a clothesline and a running seated senton. Smooth: “SAY I QUIT!” Referee: “What did you say???” Norman retains.

Rating: D. I remember watching this when it aired and yeah it’s kind of funny. It’s annoying that this is what Norman is stuck doing because they have no idea what else to do with him but at least they’re giving us some funny ideas. The problem here though is Norman has to lose the thing eventually and I have a feeling there will be a lot more jokes before we finally get to that point.

Skipper is on the phone again and says Rection took the money, making it Awesome who will be down two on one. As you might expect, Awesome overhears this and is livid.

Now Okerlund is trying to get Disqo’s career on the line, offering Viagra as a reward. That goes nowhere so he offers money, only to get thrown out.

Paisley vs. Major Gunns

Tygress is out for commentary but realizes she’s here for the wrong match, only to stay anyway. Tygress: “Tony you want to get a little filthy with me later?” It’s a catfight to start with Paisley talking a lot of trash. A handspring elbow crushes Gunns in the corner and it’s back to the catfight stuff. Gunns gets in a horrible looking slap but Tygress gets on the apron for a forearm, knocking her into a rollup to give Paisley the pin.

The Filthy Animals can’t get Disqo’s career on the line either. They leave Cat’s office and most of the locker room is waiting outside to be disappointed. Again, kind of funny.

Skipper tells Storm that the plan worked. Thanks for clarifying that for us.

Mike Sanders vs. Disqo Inferno

Remember that Disqo’s career is NOT on the line. For some reason Disqo sends the Animals to the back before elbowing Sanders out to the floor. Disqo actually follows up by sending him into the barricade a few times to keep Sanders in trouble. Back in and Sanders grabs a quick hot shot to send Disqo right back to the floor.

Mike slowly pounds away and grabs a suplex for two. He isn’t exactly strong on offense yet. Disqo fights up with all of his usual stuff, capped off by the Last Dance. Cue the Thrillers to attack the Animals (standing on the ramp) as Disqo gets two off a DDT. He tries it again, only to get reversed into the 3.0 to give Mike the pin.

Rating: D+. Better match than you would expect here as Disqo is right there in the Kwee Wee camp: a talented in ring guy who never had a chance to be taken seriously because of how stupid his gimmick really was. At least he got in some stuff here and wound up with a pretty nice career despite all those years of being stuck with a comedy character.

Nash yells at Palumbo because the Thrillers screwed up with Vito and Booker. Based on this, I’m thinking they’re totally fine.

US Title: Lance Storm vs. General Rection vs. Mike Awesome

Storm is defending, it’s one fall to a finish and both challengers think the other is in league with Lance. Before the match, Storm says he may have misjudged us. He was watching some of the political campaigning and there are some lofty goals in this country. Of course, those goals have already been accomplished in Canada. Therefore, the true American Dream (Storm: “If you will.”) is to become Canadian.

Mike and Rection get in each others’ faces before punching Storm because they’re actually smart. After a botched double clothesline, Rection holds Storm’s legs for an Awesome Splash. They switch places with Rection hitting a top rope elbow, followed by a pop up sitout powerbomb from Awesome.

Storm manages to stop both in a charge but there goes the referee. Cue Elix Skipper (who was clearly halfway to the ring before the ref got bumped, though it’s understandable given how badly Storm was getting destroyed) to low bridge Awesome and knock Rection out with the ring. The Maple Leaf on the unconscious Rection retains the title.

Rating: D+. Dang it WCW, cut this stuff out. They set up a nice little story with Skipper trying to play both guys but getting caught. Ok, that’s fine. That’s an idea that could go somewhere, especially before a triple threat. Instead of letting this story build up to a pay per view match with both guys thinking the other is evil (like Summerslam 92), they blow it off on the same night in a meaningless three minute match with interference from Skipper.

Stevie goes to be with his brother before this match.

Big Vito/Booker T. vs. Kevin Nash/Chuck Palumbo

Jarrett is on commentary despite not having anything to do with any of these people. Vito comes out first and is promptly beaten down, only to have Booker run in for the save. We officially start with Vito pounding on Palumbo before it’s off to Nash who gets some of the same from the stereotypical Italian.

That’s enough of that for Nash as he kicks Vito in the face to take over, just like he did on Monday. It’s time for Vito to get slowly beaten down as you would expect with Palumbo getting in some good ring time of his own. We get the required tag behind the referee’s back, meaning Booker is sent back to the apron. You really would think that would stop happening at some point over the years.

Not that it matters as Vito clotheslines Chuck down and tags out anyway, allowing Booker to come in and pound on Nash. Everything breaks down and Jarrett gets in the ring with the guitar (of course) to go after Booker’s knee, just as the Thrillers come in to beat down Vito as the show goes off the air.

Rating: D. This got more time than I was expecting but as soon as Jarrett was out there you knew the ending was going to be screwy. Ok to be fair you knew that as soon as you started watching a WCW show. I’m glad that Palumbo got in some offense but he could have been any of the Thrillers here.

Overall Rating: D. Some of this show’s one off ideas worked quite well for some short term comedy but I still have no desire to see much of the upcoming stuff (oddly enough save for Booker vs. Nash, which could be watchable). These shows are so much easier to sit through when they’re treated like wrestling shows (albeit infused with some comedy) instead of all the shooting that Nitro has throughout. It’s still not good, but this is much more dull than awful, which I’ll take in this case. Oh and no Goldberg in the city where he was born. Nice job guys.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro – August 21, 2000: Disturbing

Monday Nitro #254
Date: August 21, 2000
Location: Kansas Coliseum, Wichita, Kansas
Attendance: 5,211
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray

Dang we’re flying through August. I’m not sure why but it feels like this month is going by faster than any has in months. Maybe I’m just talking about this because I don’t want to talk about what’s going on in WCW at the moment. We’re almost up to Fall Brawl and the main feud is still Booker T. vs. Kevin Nash. Let’s get to it.

Two notes before we get to the show. First of all, of the 5,200 people here, about 3,000 were comped. Second, there was a house show two nights before this show in Sioux City, Iowa. The show’s main event: Stevie Ray vs. Jeff Jarrett. I don’t know if that’s a regular main event for WCW at this point, but add it to the list of reasons this company is on its last legs.

We open with a recap of Russo’s shoot from last week where he wanted to fire Goldberg. Thankfully this turns into a video about Goldberg beating up a bunch of people instead. As in something people might want to watch.

Russo is on the phone with Scott Steiner, who he promises that tonight is the night. Jeff Jarrett comes in and says they need to get rid of Goldberg. Russo assures him that it’s going to work.

We see a clip of Team Canada being awesome on Thunder.

Cruiserweight Title: Elix Skipper vs. Lieutenant Loco

Skipper is defending and Lance Storm is on commentary. Rection is outside as well and starts a USA chant to get things going. They start fast (likely due to having almost no time) with Loco uppercutting the champ into the corner. A belly to back suplex looks to set up an early frog splash but Lance breaks it up with a flag shot. Rection and Storm start brawling at ringside as Skipper brings in a chair, only to have it quickly taken away. That’s the point though as Elix slips on his Grey Cup ring to knock Loco out for the pin.

We cut to the back less than five seconds after the pin to see Goldberg arriving.

Russo is on the phone with Scott and asks if he’s ready. For some reason we cut to another camera shot of Steiner saying he’s ready. Why was that camera set up?

Here’s Russo with a bunch of security and something to say. Russo talks about wanting to get off TV but they keep pulling him back in. And wouldn’t you know it, they brought him right back into one of the show’s top stories. Right now his problem is Goldberg, who runs through the crowd to take out security. Since Russo is MANLY though, Goldberg isn’t allowed to touch him due to the contract.

Therefore, Russo has an offer Goldberg can’t refuse. He pulls out a release for Goldberg which will include full payment of his contract and he can show up next Monday anywhere he wants. The papers are quickly ripped up so Russo runs his mouth even more, talking about how Jarrett, Nash and Steiner all want a piece of Goldberg tonight. Russo brings up Goldberg’s girlfriend (Beth, though I doubt I’m going to remember that) and that’s enough for Goldberg to snap. Steiner pops up on screen and he breaks into a hotel room. We see Goldberg’s girlfriend freaking out so Goldberg runs off, naturally leaving Russo posing in the ring.

Wait we’re not done yet though as Booker T. comes out to deal with Russo. You know, because so many people want to. Booker wants Russo to tell Nash that he’ll be waiting all night for the big man. Russo is NO ONE’S delivery service though because Russo made Booker. Booker was at the bottom of WCW, where Russo thinks he should still be.

So wait, is this the real Russo or was it the real Russo when he said Booker deserved to be in the main event at Bash at the Beach? Or am I just stupid for trying to figure all this out? Anyway, Booker kicks him down and gets in an ax kick for one of the few times you’ll see Russo take a beating.

Goldberg rides off on his motorcycle.

Russo yells at the Natural Born Thrillers (now with shirts) and gives Palumbo the World Title shot if Nash isn’t here on time.

Corporal Cajun/Major Gunns vs. Paisley/Kwee Wee

So Papaya is officially gone. Paisley shoves Gunns off the apron to start and Gunns…stares. Ok then. The guys start (thank goodness) with Cajun getting two off a right hand. It’s off to Gunns for one off a middle rope sunset flip before tagging Cajun back in. Paisley comes in to stand in the corner so Cajun can catapult Kwee Wee into her. Everything breaks down and the women are of course horrible. Cajun launches Gunns off the middle rope into a cross body for the pin. The guys were watchable at best and they were definitely the better part. Oh and the wrong music plays when the Misfits win.

The losers beat down the winners post match.

Russo tells Steiner to be ready for Goldberg.

Here are Tank and 3 Count to sing Tank’s new song (including lyrics about tearing out your spleen and chewing on your bladder) but Tank thinks the band screwed up. Tank goes to leave but Vampiro and the Insane Clown Posse come out to beat all four of them down. Vampiro says this is the Dark Carnival and says Juggalo Championship Wrestling is officially taking over. He holds up the JCW Title, which is somehow still around in 2016. Vampiro rants about politics and promises that he’s just getting started with Steve Borden. Tank gets back in to clear the ring out and wants a JCW Title match tonight.

Here are the Natural Born Thrillers (minus Palumbo, who is getting ready) for their debut promo. Sanders gets the mic (thank goodness) and talks about spending the last two years watching the A-list stars draw below average ratings. There’s a man at the Power Plant who has been treating them like like garbage. Sanders introduces the team and says Palumbo is going to be champion by the end of the night. Opportunity has been knocking and they’re going to give the kids someone to look up to, the men a reason to get into the gym and the women a fantasy for every night.

Cue the Filthy Animals (because Russo LOVES faction wars) with Konnan saying he thought Tank Abbott’s promos were bad. Konnan rants about them never paying any dues and having no experience in this sport. They’ve never held a title or worked at this a day in their life. Konnan’s verdict: they ain’t got it like that.

Natural Born Thrillers vs. Filthy Animals

Konnan is the odd man out and it’s O’Haire/Jindrak/Sanders in the ring. Stasiak and Konnan are on commentary (talking about Stasiak’s pet gorilla) as Rey fires off rights and lefts at Jindrak. Konnan says the Tag Team Titles are on the line here but for some reason I don’t think that’s accurate. A tilt-a-whirl slam takes Jindrak down as Konnan wants to know how Stasiak hurt his knee when he just stands in the corner and poses.

It’s off to Disqo for an elbow drop as I’m trying to figure out when the Animals turned face. Madden says this is better than watching a bunch of old guys, which Konnan refers to a traveling wax museum doing a legdrop a clothesline and posing. O’Haire and Sanders double team Disqo down to take over before it’s Jindrak coming in with a springboard clothesline. A quick Russian legsweep takes Mark down (Disqo was always totally watchable in the ring) and it’s off to Juvy with a springboard spinwheel kick.

Juvy takes Mark down with a middle rope hurricanrana and it’s time for Rey, who is quickly crotched to change control again. Konnan ribs on the Natural Born Thrillers name in a funny bit as Sanders launches Rey into an O’Haire powerslam for two. A sick Batista bomb gets two more on Rey with Disqo having to make the save.

Rey takes Mark down with a headscissors and the hot tag brings in Juvy to clean house. Disqo DDT’s Jindrak and it’s Bronco Busters all around. Tygress hits one of her own so Konnan can debut FACE FULL OF STUFF. Everything breaks down until it’s Sanders debuting the 3.0 (Randy Orton’s backbreaker) for the pin on Disqo.

Rating: B-. Probably high but I have to take what I can get on these shows. Above all else this got some time (a bit over eight minutes, an eternity on Nitro) and the match was able to go somewhere. Konnan was actually really good on commentary here and made me want to see the Animals win and was making me laugh at the same time. This is the kind of match that WCW needed to have a lot more of, but you would have to be crazy to think any of these guys were getting past the Tag Team Titles, which is where so many of WCW’s problems came from: the introduction was good but it never materialized.

We see Goldb….oh wait make sure to keep the camera on O’Haire hitting the Seanton bomb on Tygress. Ok we’ve got the violence on the woman in so now we can go to see Goldberg arrive at the hotel.

Tygress is helped to the back.

Palumbo is getting the shot tonight because Nash just isn’t here. Well at least they’re finally going somewhere with the “they’re always late” idea.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Chuck Palumbo

Booker is defending and oh sweet Russo is guest referee (naturally not even selling the beatdown from earlier). The champ works on a hammerlock to start and drops him with a quick Harlem side kick. A suplex drops Palumbo but Booker tweaks his knee again. Booker rolls him up for no count and yeah we’re doing this gem again. Palumbo gets in a shot for a very fast two and fires off some of those awesome right hands.

Booker’s sunset flip out of the corner gets Russo crawling around but stopping before one. A powerslam gets a fast near fall but Booker blasts him with a spinning forearm. The champ grabs a flapjack and Spinaroonis up, only to have the Thrillers hit the ring. Reno Rolls the Dice on Booker until Vito runs out with the stickball bat for the save. Now it’s Nash coming in with a chair to Booker’s head for a fast counted three from Booker.

Oh of course not as the Cat comes out to say Eric Bischoff made him the Commissioner and Russo is the writer. That means they’re equal (HUH?) so this match isn’t over. Wouldn’t that mean he’s overriding Russo which doesn’t work if they’re equal? The Thrillers are ejected and Booker is still officially champion because the match never ended. Booker wants to keep the match going so Cat appoints himself as referee. Good thing he had a referee shirt under his regular shirt (of course) as Russo takes over on commentary. Booker does his quick finishing sequence and retains with the Book End.

Rating: D. I lost track of what I was watching here. In other words, it’s another one of WCW’s major problems at this point: things going so fast that you can barely keep track of the match, let alone the show. It also brings up the question of why was Nash late, because apparently he arrived in between the start of the match and the four minute mark, which is quite the lucky timing. Anyway, Palumbo was trying but there was WAY too much going on to showcase anyone.

Goldberg is almost at the room! Seriously that’s how Tony put it.

Post break Goldberg gets in the ring and finds a note on the mirror saying they’re back at the arena. So it’s another movie episode.

JCW Title: Tank Abbott vs. Vampiro

Vampiro is defending and the Insane Clown Posse has taken over commentary, in whatever their over the top characters are of course. One of them dubs Tank “Pink Rabbit” and the other calls him “Hank Sandwich.” I’m not a fan of the Clowns but I remember their commentary being some of the funniest stuff I had ever heard. Vampiro kicks “Frank Rabbit’s” leg as the announcers try to figure out what Tank’s leg is made of. Tank punches the referee by mistake and then goes after Vampiro, drawing the Clowns into the ring. Muta comes in and mists Tank but 3 Count runs in for the save as this is thrown out.

Scott Steiner drags Goldberg’s girlfriend into the arena. As usual, women in a Russo promotion are helpless.

Russo gives Vito a match with Nash tonight.

Hardcore Title: Kronik vs. Norman Smiley

Smiley is the reluctant champion and asked for this match. Adams is in street clothes (I don’t want to see that street) so he sits in on commentary while Clark is left alone in the ring. Smiley, who wants to lose the title, starts swinging a kendo stick until Clark takes it away. I think you can figure out what’s going to happen next so I’ll let you put the pieces together yourself.

Clark kicks a trashcan into his face so Smiley goes outside and slaps Adams. That earns Norman a full nelson slam from Adams and the Meltdown from Clark as we’re just waiting on the Harris Twins. Adams goes to get a table (and finds smoke under the ring for some reason) before sitting back on commentary as the Twins come in and lay out Kronik with a chain. An H Bomb through a table retains Norman’s title, much to his chagrin.

Rating: F. It’s rare that a TV show gives me more than one match where I don’t know what to say but Russo has pulled it off. The match was just a backdrop for the comedy angle and another run-in to set up a match that almost no one wants to see. Kronik needed to get out of the tag division but the Harris Twins were the best opponents they could get? What did I do to get stuck with this?

Cat tells Lance Storm that Carl Oulette’s work visa has been denied so Storm is defending the US Title in a tag match against Mike Awesome and General Rection. Storm’s partner is a surprise. Oh dear.

Steiner tells Goldberg’s girlfriend that she’s a pawn.

Vito goes on a rant about how Russo isn’t his friend but tonight he’s going to fight the biggest guy in WCW.

Kevin Nash vs. Big Vito

Nash pounds him into the corner to start because Vito has been getting a very moderate push tonight so we need to crush him before it gets out of hand. There’s the boot choke but Vito escapes Snake Eyes and scores with the Mafia kick. A suplex and legdrop get two on Nash but he comes right back with a bit boot and side slam for two. Now Snake Eyes works and a chokeslam gets two. The straps go down and Nash scores with the Jackknife, only to have Booker come in (with his music playing for all of a second and a half) for the DQ.

Rating: D. As usual Nash doesn’t let anyone get in anything significant on him, though at least the Mafia kick got to make contact. You knew Vito wasn’t going to win here because he’s a main eventer though and Vito is in his early 30s. Nothing to see here as usual but at least Booker got in a shot on Nash.

Vito won’t get medical attention. I’m guessing that’s his rub.

US Title: Lance Storm/??? vs. General Rection/Mike Awesome

Storm is defending and whoever gets the pin gets the title. The Canadian flag comes out and Storm gets in some shots at the fans, only to be cut off by Jeff Jarrett’s music. Rection and Awesome get no music for reasons that aren’t clear. The production staff is way off tonight. Rection knocks Storm into the corner to start before dropping him with a gorilla press. Jeff is smart enough to kick Rection in the back, allowing Storm to nail a superkick to take over.

Jarrett breaks up a cover by Storm as the match is already getting too confusing. Rection misses a top rope elbow but Awesome tags himself in as everything breaks down. A big powerbomb puts Storm down with Jeff having to make a save, leaving Rection to hit No Laughing Matter on the champ. Cue Skipper to make a save of his own and Jeff adds a guitar shot to Mike (which might have been meant for Storm) to let Lance retain the title.

Rating: D. Another match with a bunch of stuff crammed into less than four minutes, meaning there was almost no way to catch everything. That just should not happen in a match this short, even if it was designed to set up a feud with Awesome vs. Jarrett and continue the Rection vs. Storm feud, which really isn’t of note anyway.

Steiner drags the girlfriend to the ring because she’s there to make men look dominant and powerful. Scott rants about how Goldberg started this before calling her a rather bad name for a woman as well as ugly. Goldberg slowly walks out until Jarrett hits him in the back with a chair. The villains double team Goldberg as the girlfriend watches in fear. Booker tries to make a save but Nash comes in. Goldberg fights back until Rick Steiner runs out with a pipe to put Goldberg down. They handcuff him in the corner and Steiner puts the girlfriend in the Recliner right in front of Goldberg to end the show (two minutes before the hour).

Overall Rating: D-. It takes a lot to make me uncomfortable watching wrestling. When you’ve been watching for nearly thirty years, you really do think you’ve seen everything. However, the way Russo books women on his shows are actually making me cringe. From what I can count, the following women were on this show: Beth, Major Gunns, Paisley and Tygress. Here’s what happened to them:

Major Gunns – Nothing

Tygress – Seanton bomb

Paisley – Splashed by Kwee Wee

Beth – Kidnapped, called an ugly b**** and put in the Steiner Recliner

Keep in mind that Goldberg vs. Steiner is happening because Goldberg (at least off camera) put Midajah through a table. Assuming you believe the plans that were only abandoned because the company went under, Russo was going to get to be announced as the father of Miss Hancock’s baby (no word on whether it would have been consensual).

Watching these shows is like some weird therapy as Russo tries to work out his horrible issues with women. On these shows, women are regularly beaten up, treated like garbage, jump from one man to another (Paisley), breaking a man’s heart because she doesn’t get that he’s crazy about her (Crowbar), or put in mud matches. This stuff keeps happening and it’s getting more and more disturbing to watch almost every single week.

Other than that though, this show was your usual borderline disaster with the stories feeling more like a straight to video movie and the wrestling ranging from not bad to barely worth the time. The baseline problem of this show continues to be having too much going on, leaving little time to actually build anything up. The Thrillers are a nice idea but there’s no reason to believe they’re going anywhere long term. It’s fine to see them get pushed though, even it it means nothing. Bad show overall, even with the talent trying its hardest to shine through.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Thunder – August 16, 2000: All The Rage

Thunder
Date: August 16, 2000
Location: Riverside Coliseum, Kamloops, British Columbia, Canada
Attendance: 3,264
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, Stevie Ray

With New Blood Rising out of the way, it’s time to crank up the horrible again as this past Monday went insane all over again. We’re building towards a double main event at Fall Brawl with Kevin Nash vs. Booker T. for the World Title and Goldberg vs. Scott Steiner in a battle of the monsters. Let’s get to it.

Kevin Nash is in the back when Rick Steiner comes up to argue about who should be the #1 contender. The solution: Nash vs. Steiner tonight. If Steiner wins, his brother gets the title shot. Well at least they’re not jobbing Scott again.

Team Canada arrives, minus Jacques Rougeau (allegedly over not wanting to do a job). Cat comes up to say it’s going to be Team Canada vs. three Americans. Can one of them please not be the Cat?

Kronik vs. Juggernaut/Ladies’ Choice/Michelle Starr/Rockford 2000

Jobbers of course and Kronik promises to beat them in less than two minutes. I don’t think this requires too much of an explanation as it’s total destruction with Clark taking them to the floor and powerbombing one onto the bodies of the other two. The full nelson slam and High Time pins Juggernaut in a hurry.

Post match the Harris Twins appear on the screen with a challenge before riding away on their bikes.

Mark Madden and Gene Okerlund are getting ready in the back. Yes they’re actually doing this.

Disqo can’t convince the Filthy Animals to let Mike Sanders join. He’d be better at talking than any of them so I don’t see their objection.

Vampiro yells at Muta and throws an ax.

Here’s David Flair to call out Miss Hancock. After a lot of lame lines about how amazing she is, David drops to a knee to propose. Before he can get the question out though, here’s MIA for no apparent reason to destroy him. Wall chokeslams him a few times before the team leaves. Hancock, ever the nice person, yells at David for screwing this up too and leaves, only to stop to dance a bit. Ok then.

The MIA says no one touches Major Gunns like David did on Monday. Tonight they’re going to war with Team Canada and Rection promises to bring the US Title back to America.

Crowbar and Daffney saw what happened to David but Daffney says she’s over him. This gives Crowbar hope but a guy comes up with candy and flowers for her from the secret admirer. She continues to be oblivious to Crowbar’s feelings for her. Given that Russo is writing, can we set a timer before Crowbar snaps and beats her up?

Rey Mysterio/Juventud Guerrera vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

I don’t think the titles are on the line here. Sanders is with the Animals here, or “Above Mike Average” according to Tony. Disqo lets Mike talk for a bit and gets a glare from Konnan. Juvy pounds on Jindrak in the corner to start but he gets caught in the wrong corner. On commentary, Konnan says any combination of the Animals can defend the titles. It’s quickly off to Mysterio vs. O’Haire with Rey charging into a powerslam as Tygress makes it a five person commentary booth.

Everything breaks down and Juvy uses Rey as a springboard to take Jindrak down and a bulldog does the same. Back up and Sean sends Rey in for a tilt-a-whirl side slam, followed by a backdrop to send Juvy outside. There’s the Seanton bomb to Rey and Sanders turns on Konnan (shocking), allowing Palumbo (no Stasiak) and Reno to come in and beat on the Animals for the DQ.

Rating: C-. The match was fine until the obvious and nonsensical ending. Was there any reason to have Sanders out there with the Animals in the first place if he was just going to turn on them a few minutes later? It was actually working because you had talented guys having a match but of course that wasn’t going to last around this time.

Okerlund asks Norman Smiley for help but Smiley is too busy trying to get out of the hardcore division. With no help coming, Gene thinks about doing a hurricanrana.

Tank Abbott is annoyed at 3 Count and tells them to get back to the studio to fix the new song. 3 Count doesn’t seem pleased but are you going to argue with Tank?

Demon vs. Great Muta

No Vampiro anywhere in sight to start. Muta fires off some kicks but charges into a boot in the corner. Demon slowly beats on Muta with his really lame offense, including a snapmare and suplex for two. Thankfully Muta, who is more uninterested here than horrible, comes back with his kicks and starts working on the knee. Cue Vampiro to make sure this doesn’t get interesting as Demon makes his comeback. Vampiro throws Muta a kendo stick, which the referee doesn’t seem to mind, to beat Demon down again. The dragon screw leg whip is broken up by an enziguri, only to have the green mist set up Muta’s moonsault for the quick pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as this story continues to bore everyone half to death. I have no idea why I’m supposed to care about Vampiro, Demon and Muta having these random matches against each other while Vampiro tries to be a less talented (and shorter) Undertaker. Another dull match though with Muta just going through the motions, though can you blame him?

Post match Demon gets beaten down some more and Vampiro promises to destroy Sting.

Someone knocks on Rick Steiner’s door but there’s no one there.

Madden insults Pamela and promises to beat up her sugar daddy tonight. Who knew Gene was loaded?

Misfits in Action vs. Team Canada

Rection/Loco/Cajun here. The fans go off on the Misfits for interrupting the Canadian national anthem which is still odd to see. Skipper can’t keep up with Cajun to start and gets caught in a quick suplex so it’s off to Loco and Carl (with his hard to spell last name, though apparently he’s now known as the Rage). A headscissors staggers Carl so he grabs Loco and hits one heck of a chokeslam to knock him silly.

It’s off to Skipper for a suplex before handing it to Storm for a great looking dropkick. Loco finally gets in a DDT to Storm and makes the hot tag off to Rection. Everything breaks down as Rection cleans house, including No Laughing Matter on Carl, only to have Skipper nail him with the Cruiserweight Title. Storm grabs the Maple Leaf to make Rection tap.

Rating: D+. Quick and mostly inoffensive here but there really isn’t much to see. Team Canada winning in Canada was the only option but the Misfits really aren’t the most interesting team in the world. Does anyone remember why they started in the first place at this point? Now they’re just a military themed midcard stable which has been done so many times before.

Post match Cat comes out and makes himself vs. Storm with the US Title and commissionership on the line.

US Title: The Cat vs. Lance Storm

Storm is defending so Cat elbows him in the face to start, only to dance too much and get caught in a sunset flip. A jawbreaker and shoulder (with Storm landing on his feet) drop Cat but he pops up with the Feliner. The referee takes his sweet time counting though, likely meaning Carl was late running to the ring with the Canadian flag for the DQ.

Cat promises vengeance on Nitro.

Rick Steiner yells at Pamela (why do people hate her so much?) and a piece of the set falls on him. Scott Steiner comes in to yell at people.

Mark Madden vs. Gene Okerlund

Let’s get this over with. Madden is in a Steelers jersey and says when he kills Okerlund, every coroner on the planet will swear it was old age. Gene is in what looks like a local hockey jersey, a Canada hat and sunglasses. They make it a street fight just because. Before the match, we have a posedown with Madden teasing taking his shirt off. A single forearm drops Mark but he comes back with a few chokes.

Cue Smiley but Carl (WAY too much of him tonight) cuts him off. This brings out Vito to fight Carl as Gene gives Madden a right hand for the most awkward two count of all time. Madden loads up a Vader Bomb but here’s Pamela to hit him low and give Gene the pin. Too short to rate but they kept this goofy enough to prevent this from being horrible.

Pamela kisses Gene during the celebration.

Here’s your weekly sitdown interview, this time with Jeff Jarrett. Jeff talks about wrestling being ahead of the curve for years and they’re right in the middle of that at the moment. He sees the problem as people learning to wrestle in six months at the Power Plant and then showing up on Nitro without learning how this business works. Quite true actually. The fans are the only ones that can change that but Jeff goes into a discussion of wrestlers who want it because they’ll put in the effort to learn every time they’re in the ring.

As for leaving the WWF, Jeff hasn’t looked back and knows it was the right decision. Jeff thinks WCW is starting to get it, even though they’re down right now. Tony brings up the New Blood Rising match and calls it the match of the year. Jeff doesn’t agree (good) and thinks he could have done better. The match was good and he respects Booker T., who should be a model of what wrestlers should be. Jeff wants to bring the workrate up in WCW but backstage issues have been causing them a lot of problems. Imagine what could happen if they kept going in the right direction.

This interview, while far less infuriating because Jeff was absolutely right on a lot of things he was saying, continues the trend of having no real point. Jarrett was out of character here, which probably confused most of the fans watching this. It made sense to me because I got what was going on, but most fans would have been wondering why he was so nonchalant about losing to Booker and wasn’t threatening Tony with a guitar.

In other words, these things continue to only entertain people who already know what Jarrett or others are talking about and really offer little to the masses. Hence why it’s longer than any match on the show, because that’s what these shows exist for: to entertain everyone other than the viewers at home.

Kidman tells Vito that he’ll have his back against Carl tonight. Apparently Vito vs. Reno is family business.

Big Vito vs. Carl Ouellet

Carl jumps him to start and gets in a quick slam, only to miss a middle rope legdrop. Vito hits his own legdrop, followed by a top rope elbow (still looks pretty good) for two. Back up and Carl grabs a powerslam but his top rope splash hits knees. A middle rope headbutt gets two more for Vito as they’re moving far better than you would expect here. They chop it out until Vito knees him in the ribs, setting up the inverted DDT for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. Much better than I was expecting here, even though I really didn’t need to see Carl involved in three different matches tonight. Vito isn’t ever going anywhere with his generic Italian character but he does seem to actually be working hard with it. Ouellet on the other hand needs to get out of here already as he’s just not that good.

Post match Reno comes in and Rolls the Dice on Vito, only to have Kidman come out and dropkick a chair into Reno’s face. Palumbo, O’Haire, Jindrak and Sanders run in and eventually lay Kidman out, only to have the Filthy Animals run in for the save. Storm and Skipper come in but are held off, only to have Mike Awesome run out to clear the villains away.

Rick Steiner is being taken away in an ambulance, apparently due to being hit with a pipe by Goldberg. Glad to know we didn’t have time to see that.

Here’s Kevin Nash for his weekly non-match. Hall isn’t here because they were out having a good time last night and he’s not recovered yet. So Scott is just traveling around the world, following WCW wherever they go? That’s rather sad. Nash isn’t going to bother calling out Goldberg tonight because he knows Bill is scared of him. That brings him to Booker, who he’ll take the title from at Fall Brawl. Cue Booker to disagree, even though he respects Nash. They’ll give the people what they want at Fall Brawl but Nash promises not to go after Booker tonight. They shake hands and Nash lays Booker out with the usual to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was actually one of the better Thunders in a good while despite the show just being there. Nothing on this show really mattered and they’re just kind of meandering towards Fall Brawl with no real direction. Now that being said, I’ll take a lame show over the horrible Nitros they’ve been airing anytime. Nothing on here was so bad that I didn’t want to keep watching (Madden vs. Okerlund was short and it involved Pamela) and there was very little shooting (angle wise at least) to mess it up. Somehow this passes for better in WCW these days though, which is just sad.

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Monday Nitro – August 14, 2000: Somebody Help Me Out Here

Monday Nitro #253
Date: August 14, 2000
Location: Skyreach Place, Kelowna, British Columbia, Canada
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

We’ve gotten through New Blood Rising and now it’s time to get ready for another of WCW’s grand pay per views in Fall Brawl. Booker T. is still World Champion and now gets to defend against Kevin Nash, who survived the totally real triple threat last night. I’m not sure why but I have a feeling this show is going to be bad. Let’s get to it.

We open with Russo and Tank Abbott in the ring with Vince in full on heel mode, ranting about getting rid of someone a month ago. That piece of censored has been gone ever since and now Russo is going to make another example out of another piece of censored on live TV. Russo is here tonight to fire Goldberg on live TV.

However, Brad Siegel won’t let him do that because the fans love him. Well screw the fans and screw Goldberg. Hudson: “He doesn’t need the practice.” Tank is here to beat Goldberg up once and for all and Russo yells at some more fans. Apparently Goldberg doesn’t know the script or the storyline because he doesn’t come out. Since no one comes out, Russo tells production to go to a break. Good grief. I mean….good grief man. This is how they open the show? That’s their best idea?

We come back with a camera on the announcers and Russo demanding that they show the clip. That sends up to a video of Goldberg coming out to fight Tank during the break. Wait or is this live? Goldberg easily gets the better of it and threatens to break Tank’s arm as Russo freaks out AGAIN and demands that we go to a second break inside of twelve minutes.

Apparently Russo has booked Nash vs. Steiner tonight because last night’s match didn’t count. Again I say: whatever. Oh and Booker vs. Jarrett again.

Shane Douglas/Reno vs. Big Vito/Kidman

Before the match, Shane promises to hurt Kidman again. It’s a brawl to start of course with all four fighting on the floor and Madden freaking out over the chance of someone attacking the table. Vito easily fights out of a double team because Reno and Shane aren’t the best fighters in the world. Kidman finally stops chasing Torrie around and cross bodies both of them down. As usual we have no tagging as Vito clotheslines Shane out to the floor. Kidman gets crotched on top but Vito is able to drop a top rope elbow for the pin on Reno.

Rating: D. Total mess here as is almost the case when WCW tries to put together a match. The idea of having two feuds put together into one match is usually a good idea but the Shane vs. Kidman feud is getting tiresome and Reno vs. Vito isn’t really a feud yet. It might be nice if we were told why they were fighting in the first place but I doubt WCW knows yet.

Shane pulls out some handcuffs but gets tied to the turnbuckle for his efforts. This brings out Jindrak, O’Haire and the Perfect Event to beat down Kidman and Vito. Reno leaves with them.

The Filthy Animals want to keep up their relationship with the Cat and offer him a personal assistant named Miss Jones. I think you get the implication here.

David Flair is still covered in mud from last night. Major Gunns comes up to ask if Miss Hancock is ok but David just walks away without saying anything.

We look back at the mud match from last night as David is in the ring. He rambles about what happened last night and how scared he is. Gunns is freaking out in the back while the Misfits play cards. As David keeps going on about being scared, Gunns comes out crying, saying it’s her fault because she kicked Hancock in the stomach. David really should know that already shouldn’t he? He yells at Gunns a lot until Hancock comes out, apparently just fine after last night. Again, shouldn’t David know that Hancock is here and fine? Hancock of course says she’s pregnant and Davis is so thrilled that he struts.

Here’s Lance Storm for a match but first up he gets to address his home country. Storm says it’s good to be home and wrestling in front of some real wrestling fans. WCW has thrown people at him left and right but he keeps making them tap out to the Maple Leaf. Cue the Cat to insult the Canadian fans quite a bit. It seems that a lot of the people in WCW really don’t like Canada. Cat rips on Storm for using the Canadian rule book last night and grants Mike Awesome a rematch tonight with himself as guest referee.

US Title: Mike Awesome vs. Lance Storm

Storm is defending and Cat is referee in the first rematch from last night. Awesome charges to the ring and gets dropkicked down in the first ten seconds for a very delayed two count. A splash gets two for Mike as the fans are all over the USA. Mike drops a slingshot splash to the back for two more as this is one of the most all over the places face/heel dynamic I’ve ever seen. Storm dropkicks him down again but stops to argue with Cat, allowing Awesome to grab a German suplex.

The Awesome bomb plants Storm but Jacques Rougeau comes in to attack Cat. Mike goes to beat him up too but Carl Ouellet, as in Quebecer Pierre, comes in to double team Awesome. The Cannonball (their old team finisher) sets up the Maple Leaf. Cat gets back up but here’s Elix Skipper of all people comes out and lays him out. Ouellet grabs Mike’s unconscious hand to make him tap out with Rougeau calling for the bell.

Rating: D. So the people who are usually heels cheated to beat the cheating faces who are acting as heels with the help of a bunch of guys who may or may not be Canadian after cheating like crazy to face reactions last night. All this happened during a mostly lame match which featured a newly formed heel stable. You can add Storm to the list of things completely overbooked in Russo’s world.

Post break Storm officially forms Team Canada and hands Ouellet the Hardcore Title. Skipper gets the Cruiserweight Title, which is actually a clever way to get the titles off Storm without jobbing him (again). Cat runs in with a ball bat and says the new champions are defending their titles tonight.

WCW World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Booker T.

Booker is defending in another rematch from last night despite there being no real reason for Jarrett to get another title shot. No hype or anything here of course, making it feel less important than a house show main event. Booker starts fast with a clothesline but Jeff kicks him low to break up a sleeper. Jeff’s high cross body is rolled through for two, only to have him kick Booker right in the face.

We hit the chinlock on the champ for a bit before the clotheslines have Jeff in trouble. Booker’s side kick doesn’t hurt the knee (not a factor so far) so he picks up the guitar, only to hit the referee by mistake. Here’s another referee so Booker can hit the ax kick but Jeff hits him in the knee. The Stroke knocks Booker silly but here’s Goldberg to go after Jeff for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Well done on making the champion look like a loser in a match that didn’t mean anything because it didn’t need to be here on a nothing show. This could have been anyone against Jeff, or at least could have come later in the show after a few quick promos from both guys. Why do that though when you can fly through it as fast as you can?

Goldberg says that’s one down and two to go, implying Russo and……who actually?

Scott Steiner literally puts his finger in Pamela’s mouth and threatens to destroy Goldberg tonight.

Hardcore Title: Carl Ouellet vs. Norman Smiley

Carl is defending and Norman wants nothing to do with hardcore anymore. They quickly head outside with Ouellet doing as much stuff as you can do in a hardcore match. Hudson actually tries to keep track of the hardcore rules as Norman stops Carl from setting up a table. Tony one ups him by bringing up Storm’s hardcore rules from last week.

A trashcan to the head puts Norman down again and the table is set up in the corner. Norman’s comeback is quickly stopped as the announcers actually suggest that Goldberg might come out during this match. That’s so stupid I can’t even make fun of it. The table is pulled out of the corner but Norman avoids the cannonball and falls on Carl for the pin and the title.

Rating: F+. Well so much for the false hope of Norman having something new. Instead we now get to see him as the reluctant champion because it’s going to lead to comedy. Heaven forbid someone talented and over gets to move on to something important because he can still get to do something “funny” instead. At least Carl, who looked like he was in sweats sitting around the house, didn’t keep the title that long.

Nash says there’s no second chance for Steiner until Scott Hall gets his second chance.

Tag Team Titles: Filthy Animals vs. Dark Carnival

Muta and Vampiro are defending after winning the titles in an impromptu match last night. Konnan challenges Kronik for no apparent reason so here they are to do commentary. Great now we can almost guarantee a Harris Brothers appearance. It’s Juvy and Rey challenging for the titles here. The Twins jump Kronik during the champs’ entrance so we lose commentary.

Rey gets beaten down to start as the Animals take Kronik’s place, allowing Konnan to ramble on about Mexican strategy. Muta kicks Rey into the corner before it’s back to Vampiro so we can keep things dull. A Muta cheap shot stops Rey’s comeback bid and it’s Disqo trying to fire him up. They head outside with Rey staying in trouble until Vampiro kicks Muta by mistake.

The hot tag brings in Juvy to clean house as everything breaks down. Juvy gets misted and there’s the dragon screw legwhip to put him down. We’re not done with the interference though as Sting comes out (Tony to Konnan: “Was this part of your strategy?” Konnan: “Let’s see if it works and then I’ll tell you.”) and destroys Vampiro and Muta, allowing Disqo to put Juvy on Muta for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This was actually one of the better matches tonight until the screwy finish. That’s the story of the night: something that could be interesting is ruined by whatever overbooked nonsense that Russo has for us. At least it might mean we’re done with Vampiro and Muta as anything important, at least for the time being. That being said, was there any reason to not have the Animals win the titles last night and cut out a bunch of extra stuff?

Post break Demon wants Sting in a four corners match along with Muta and Vampiro. Cat: “Aren’t you supposed to say trick or treat?”

Cruiserweight Title: Elix Skipper vs. Kwee Wee

Skipper is defending and grabs some early rollups for two as Madden promises to deal with Gene Okerlund later tonight. Kwee Wee grabs a nice belly to back and stomps away as he’s already going angry. A suplex into the corner sends Skipper back first into the buckle (that looked good) but he’s still able to sidestep a charge and send Kwee Wee crashing out to the floor. Hudson makes sex jokes about Madden as Skipper does the Matrix move to a big reaction.

The champ gets two each off a dragon suplex and a middle rope cross body as the fans are way into Skipper here. Kwee Wee tries a suplex but Skipper kicks his feet to fall backwards, rolling into a DDT. With the referee conveniently looking away, Skipper loads up a ring, only to get caught in a Blue Thunder bomb for two. Elix finally gets in a ring shot to knock Kwee Wee cold and retain the title.

Rating: B-. Well that was a surprise. Sometimes you find a pairing that just has a good match and that’s exactly what you got here. Kwee Wee is much more character than anything else but at least he had one good match to his name here. Skipper is a great option as a high flier, especially after the division has completely died in the last few months. Match of the night by far here.

Post match Kwee Wee beats up the referee before settling back down into his normal self.

Sting vs. Demon vs. Vampiro vs. Great Muta

Officially a four corners match. During the entrances, Madden issues a challenge to Okerlund for a one on one match. Vampiro and Muta wait on the apron to start as Sting beats on the Demon. Sting takes Demon down so the other two come in with Vampiro stomping the mat, only to have Sting actually sell it. As in there was at least a foot between Vampiro and Sting but he sold it anyway. Sting fights back, gives Muta a Stinger splash and puts on the Deathlock. Demon offers to make the save but hits Vampiro with a kendo stick instead, leaving Muta no choice but to tap. Nothing match but it was more shenanigans.

Vampiro cleans house with the stick and take Sting away.

Post break Vampiro is about to stab Sting because we haven’t ripped off Undertaker’s embalming stuff yet.

Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner

This is yet another rematch but Nash brings out something in a box. We’ve got less than five minutes to go in the show as Nash grabs a mic. He’s seen a lot of Scott Hall signs around here lately and stops for a mostly non-existent Hall chant. Everywhere he goes, Nash has been asked what Hall is up to.

That brings him to the box, which contains a Hall cardboard cutout which says “hey yo.” Nash makes fun of it for wearing an NWO shirt and does a survey about wanting Hall back. Enough of that though as it’s time to call out Booker T. Cue the champ but Steiner runs out and blasts Booker with a pipe. Goldberg pops up on screen, holding Midajah by the hair. He loads her up for a Jackhammer through a table but the screen cuts off. Steiner runs to the back to find Midajah through the table to end the show in another bait and switch.

Overall Rating: F+. So we had a bunch of nothing matches, five title matches, four title changes (two of which actually took place in a match), the setup for Goldberg vs. Steiner and a big SHOOT out to open the show. This was another week with way too much going on because the idea of just letting stories advance as they would naturally is unthinkable around here. I’m running out of names to call the same Russo problems here and I have a feeling that’s going to become an even bigger problems as we get to even dumber stuff.

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New Blood Rising (2015 Redo): Exactly As Advertised

New Blood Rising
Date: August 13, 2000
Location: Pacific Coliseum, Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada
Attendance: 6,614
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

I’m really not sure what to say about this one. It’s borderline legendary in how horrible it is due to the levels of Russo pumped into it with one match in particular. I’ve seen this show a few times before and every time I watch it I can’t believe what I’m seeing. There’s no way around this so let’s get to it.

First and foremost: is there a reason this show is named after the New Blood when they haven’t been a thing in about a month at least?

As I load this up on the Network, I keep expecting some warning to pop up telling me it’s not worth it.

The opening video shows Jeff Jarrett breaking a bunch of guitars over various people. Then we cover the real main event of Goldberg vs. Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner in what is being teased as a shoot. As opposed to all the other matches which are worked shoots you see. This one is going to be a REAL shoot.

In an odd camera shot, we see the New Blood Rising logo in the corner of the arena but it’s quickly covered by pyro from one of the ring corners. Who shoots from there?

3 Count vs. Jung Dragons

This is a double ladder match for 3 Count’s recording contract as well as their gold record. Tank Abbott is with 3 Count and has a shirt with the nipple areas cut out for no apparent reason. So 3 Count wants the record because it’s theirs and the Dragons want the contract so 3 Count can never record again. I’m not even going to try to make sense out of this mess. Oh and you have to tag in a ladder match.

Jamie and Shane get things going but everyone realizes that this is a ladder match so they sprint up to the entrance to make this interesting. Shannon makes a quick save on Yang as Tony thinks he’s going for the gold record because the ladder is hung underneath it. Ignore the fact that the contract is on top of the record so he’s under both of them. Yang gets crotched on a ladder in the corner as the fans are way more quiet than they should be for a six man ladder match.

Shannon splashes Yang and covers for a second because no one understands the rules of this mess. Three straight splashes crush Yang against a ladder in the corner as Scott asks the stupid question of what label is on the contract. Yang gets up again, only to be down onto the top rope. This hasn’t been his night so far.

3 Count goes outside so Jamie can hit a huge dive for a good reaction. We get a second ladder so Shannon can pull Yang off with a sleeper drop. Shane neckbreakers Jamie off as well, leaving Evan to suplex Kaz down to put all six on the mat in a heap. Yang gets a ladder superkicked into his face but the Dragons come back with a pair of spinwheel kicks to get one of their only advantages.

Kaz charges into a powerslam on the ladder as Evan seems to have a bad ankle. Shannon does a springboard over the top to catapult the end of the ladder into Jamie and Shane’s faces. That always looks sick. Shannon is thrown back in and gets splashed by two Dragons, allowing Jamie to grab the gold record. Not that it matters as Tank knocks him out and steals it back, earning himself some homophobic chants.

Evan gets crushed between a ladder as Tony yells at Madden for not understanding the logic behind this match. Jamie powerbombs Shannon off the ladder but Tank shoves over both ladders to take out a member of each team. Evan climbs up and gets the contract for the win (I guess?).

Rating: B. Enjoy this one people because it’s the last good match you’re going to see for about two hours. These six guys would give the fans everything they could and then be asked to do it again week after week because WCW didn’t care about any of them. I know Russo’s mantra continued to be about pushing the young guys, but giving them the same matches over and over again without letting them get anywhere isn’t a push. Still though, fun stuff here, even if it was nothing compared to what Edge and Christian and company were doing at the time.

Tank leaves with the record and the contract.

The Filthy Animals want to referee the Tag Team Title match. As in four referees in an eight man match. On top of that, they want a shot tomorrow night. Rey promises to make sure Cat beats Great Muta as an incentive.

Great Muta vs. The Cat

Cat talks some trash and hits Muta in the head with the mic to get things going. Some kicks set up a dancing elbow (I love Rock but good night I wish the People’s Elbow wasn’t copied so much) but Muta grabs the arm as Hudson talks about the “legitimate heat” between these two. Tony goes on about how lame “the marquee says wrestling” line is as the fans want Bret. Cat fires off some strikes but is mesmerized by the power of Muta’s bald spot, allowing Muta to kick him back down.

Cue Tygress (fans: “WE WANT PUPPIES!”) as Cat kicks Muta out to the floor. Back in and they hit each other a few more times until Muta snaps off a dragon screw leg whip to take over. Muta misses the moonsault but sprays green mist at Cat. This isn’t a DQ for whatever reason, allowing Tygress to hit Muta with a chair for two. Instead Cat fires off a bunch of kicks for the pin.

Rating: D-. Standard Nitro match here (yeah a D- is pretty standard these days) with Cat showing why he should almost never be in the ring. He’s a great talker but that doesn’t mean he’s anything more than a guy who kicks a lot. Muta continues to look bored and I still don’t know why they brought him back in.

So we’re just under half an hour into the show and it’s been quite watchable to this point. That’s about to fall apart.

Buff Bagwell can’t find his mom.

Buff Bagwell vs. Positively Kanyon

This is Judy Bagwell on a pole, which means Kanyon drives her in on a forklift. See because she’s a bit overweight. For reasons that I’ll never understand, Kanyon wanted Judy to be his Kimberly. Kanyon calls her a battleax a few times until Buff finally figures out that his mom is on a freaking forklift in the arena.

Buff runs out to throw Kanyon over the barricade to start the fight in the crowd. I’m assuming you win by pin here but I doubt Russo ever got past “so we put her on a forklift.” They get back to the ring for the opening bell and Kanyon grabs a middle rope Russian legsweep for two. Kanyon cuts off the turnbuckle pad because this doesn’t have enough going on yet.

Buff jumps into a sitout Alabama slam for two and we hit the chinlock. The Kanyon Cutter is broken up and Buff drops him forehead first onto the exposed buckle for two. Now the Kanyon Cutter connects for two…..and here’s David Arquette, who hits Buff with a hard hat for two. A double Blockbuster is enough for the pin on Kanyon, winning Judy back for Buff…..I think?

Rating: F. The match itself was watchable at times but they brought David Arquette back for a two minute cameo. This was like watching a movie with a gorilla in a top hat and tails standing in the corner doing nothing. Judy on the forklift was such a distraction and really didn’t change anything, making the match a combination of boring and WHAT AM I WATCHING. In other words, the Russo Special.

Arquette gets a Kanyon Cutter post match.

Lance Storm arrives with a police escort. You would expect Storm to arrive on time.

Goldberg isn’t here due to a motorcycle accident. And so it begins.

Tag Team Titles: Kronik vs. Perfect Event vs. Misfits in Action vs. Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak

Kronik is defending, Rection and Cajun are representing the Misfits and the Filthy Animals (as in Mysterio/Disqo/Tygress/Juvy are ALL guest referees). Konnan sits in on commentary to give us a ridiculous thirteen people involved with one match. Before the match Disqo threatens everyone, saying he has the authority to have them wrestling polar bears in Nome, Alaska if they step out of line.

Palumbo and Adams start things off as Disqo is the in ring referee. Chuck is quickly sent to the floor so it’s off to Stasiak, who walks into a full nelson slam. Cajun vs. Jindrak now with Mark taking over via some technical stomping as the fans loudly chant…..something. O’Haire comes in to punch Clark, followed by a nice spinning kick to the head for two. A hard slam drops O’Haire but Disqo counts slow.

Rection comes in and gets a slow count as well as there are far too many empty seats opposite the hard camera. Tygress gives Rection a Bronco Buster but the General raises his boot to block Rey’s attempt. We get the Sting falling headbutt/low blow spot on Stasiak before it’s back to Cajun for the dancing punches. That means another slow count as the announcers have no idea whose side the Animals are on.

Rection comes in and starts cleaning house as everything breaks down. Palumbo’s great right hands stagger Rection and it’s off to a sleeper. Disqo checks the arm twice and slaps Rection in the face to wake him up. Palumbo superkicks Rection back down as the fans want Bret again. It’s off to Cajun who is quickly sent outside as everything breaks down again.

The Seanton bomb nails Clark but here’s the Dark Carnival to break up High Times to Palumbo. Clark gives Palumbo the Meltdown for the slowest two count yet so he yells at Disqo. High Times plants Palumbo again but here’s Lieutenant Loco to steal Disqo’s shirt and count the pin, thereby screwing over the Misfits in the process to keep the titles on Kronik.

Rating: D-. What in the world did I just watch? Instead of anything resembling a regular match, this was a bunch of quick segments with Disqo tying everything together (work with me here) until Chavo ran in for the completely illogical ending. I get the idea that Disqo wanted to give the Animals the easiest match possible tomorrow night but this was just WAY too much for what they were going for.

Jeff Jarrett accuses Pamela of wearing Okerlund out last night. He’s been looking for Booker all day long and the champ better have eyes in the back of his head.

Shane Douglas vs. Kidman

Strap match with wins via pinfall. Before the match, Shane says Kidman isn’t man enough to keep up with Torrie all night long (which is nothing like the story of X-Pac vs. Kane with X-Pac using the exact same line about Kane and Tori in a storyline that aired earlier in the year). Kidman ties up the legs to start and Shane is rather irritated. A legdrop gets one for Kidman as Madden goes over the benefits of having a shirt on here.

In one of the funniest and at the same time saddest moments of the show, the announcers try to make fat jokes about Torrie based on that video from Monday. How do you even keep a straight face on a line like that? Shane crotches him with the strap and chokes a bit, followed by the reverse Hennig neck snap (which is actually a cool move). Torrie gets in some choking of his own and it’s off to a knuckle lock of all things.

Since it’s just a knuckle lock, Kidman comes back with a hurricanrana out of the corner and the Low Down gets two. Kidman finally gets smart and takes Shane’s shirt off, meaning they can actually start using the strap for a change. Torrie accidentally hits Shane in the face with a shoe for a near fall, followed by the Pittsburgh Plunge to Kidman for the same. A quick Kid Crusher (Killswitch) gives Kidman the pin.

Rating: D. Another match where there was no need for a gimmick because Russo doesn’t get how to actually run matches. Kidman getting the win was good but the Torrie factor is really starting to drag. The stuff where she used to be with Kidman was fine but I’m supposed to care that she used to be overweight? It doesn’t quite work when she’s a bombshell and one of the best looking women ever in wrestling.

Kidman spanks her with the strap so Shane hangs him in the corner, drawing Vito out for the save. Reno sneaks in from behind and gets beaten up by Vito as well.

Booker arrives and Jarrett attacks him by slamming Booker’s knee in the car door.

Miss Hancock vs. Major Gunns

Rip off the Camouflage and of course there’s mud. An early slap starts the catfight and Hancock does a Muta handspring elbow. Madden gets right to the point and says he wants to see these two lose their clothes. Gunns gets a jackknife cover for two in the ring because the rules are still all over the place. Hancock rips off the top to reveal more camouflage and I’m sure you get the idea here.

After a facebuster gives us the upskirt shot, Hancock loses the bottom half of her dress to reveal camouflage shorts. A cross body gets two for Hancock but she charges into a foot to the stomach. Hancock misses a cross body and goes to the floor holding her stomach. Oh here we go.

Gunns gets posted and Hancock rips off the shorts to reveal a swimsuit bottom. They head up the aisle with Hancock losing her top. Gunns gets sent into the mud and drags Hancock with her as Madden is calling himself daddy. Hancock gyrates a bit and goes down holding her stomach again, allowing Gunns to get an easy pin.

Rating: F. Do I really need to explain this one? The women looked good in their outfits but they’re horrible in the ring and the ending made it even worse. This stuff stopped being interesting a long time ago because EVERYTHING is an angle. You get numb to this stuff after a while and we passed that point nearly eight months ago with Russo.

David Flair dives into the mud to check on Hancock. To get this over with as quickly as we can: yes she was supposed to be pregnant and yes Russo was probably going to be revealed as the father because in Vince Russo’s WCW, he gets to sleep with Miss Hancock. Of course this is treated in the serious voices and made to be something real. Yes really real.

The Dark Carnival wants Demon to prove himself.

The announcers are all serious again and use Hancock’s real name to make sure this is as shooty as possible.

Sting vs. The Demon

Sting repels in from the ceiling and wins with the Death Drop in less than a minute, which included a brawl in the aisle.

Vampiro and Muta come in to beat down Sting. Kronik comes in for the save as Demon walks by the brawl. For no logical reason, Kronik offers to put the titles on the line tonight.

Booker’s knee is being worked on.

US Title: Mike Awesome vs. Lance Storm

Storm, with a bit of a mouse under his eye, is defending and gets the big Goldberg entrance. You can see that Storm is really proud to be here as he talks about getting to wrestle in the greatest country in the world tonight. The extra security is due to his hatred in America and he’s worried about a terrorist attack in the back. It’s not his fault that he threatens the American illusion and he defeats another American hero tonight. As for this match, he’s using rule 32B of the Canadian rule book to appoint a special referee: Jacques Rougeau! As in the Mountie! And not Bret Hart!

After a full rendition of O Canada (which is a big deal here and “not a work” according to Tony), we’re ready to go with Madden in tears. Rougeau will be the outside referee as Awesome hammers away, only to be sent shoulder first into the post. They head outside and Awesome loads up a table, drawing the required ECW chants.

Storm drives him into the barricade for a break but Awesome snaps off a belly to belly back inside. Mike slips off the top to a lot of jeering but quiets the fans down with a wicked sitout Awesome bomb for the pin and the title. That was a VERY close pin and Rougeau says no, which actually seems fair in this case.

We’re not done yet though as Rougeau has the Canadian rule book, which says you need a FIVE count. I didn’t know King Kong Bundy was Canadian. Tony: “Did this happen when we were in Toronto last year?” Awesome slams him for three before grabbing a dragon sleeper of all things for the tap out. I think you know where we’re going here.

The book says a title match is pinfall only so the match continues. Mike throws him down with a release German suplex and a slingshot shoulder gets four. You can imagine how screwy this must be for everyone involved. The Awesome splash gets give to give Awesome the pin (and Storm’s third job in about eight minutes) but this is Texas Death rules (in Canada?) so after a pin, Storm has until ten to get to his feet.

Mike throws a table in but gets chaired in the back for four. In theory wouldn’t you want the five count so you can have another eight or nine seconds to get up? Both guys go up and something like a belly to belly superplex puts both of them through the table. Rougeau rules that the first person to their feet by ten (huh?) wins. Mike is almost up first so Rougeau punches him out at seven to keep the title on Storm.

Rating: C-. I actually didn’t hate this as you could clearly see the idea they were going for. Now it was stupid to have Rougeau as the referee (Heidi would have actually made more sense) and to have the champ job that many times in one night, but there was at least an idea here. The bigger problem here of course is that Awesome didn’t cheat so Storm keeps losing over and over, but the live crowd was going to eat it up anyway. It’s over thinking as always, though it’s nowhere near as bad as it could have been. The action itself worked too so this was actually easy to watch.

Oh and here’s Bret Hart after the match for the Canadian pride moment. You know, because BRET HART would totally go for something like this. I’ve always thought that’s why he didn’t do the referee job here. Can you imagine Bret standing for something this stupid?

Nash doesn’t buy Goldberg’s motorcycle story and says he’s going over Steiner and getting the title back.

Tag Team Titles: Kronik vs. Dark Carnival

Kronik is defending in case you didn’t see them enough earlier tonight. Tony brings up Canadian rules and Madden slips up by saying Vampiro is from Canada, making the whole thing even screwier. Clark shoulders Vampiro for two to start and a big powerbomb gets the same. Muta gets choked in the corner and it’s back to Vampiro to get powerslammed for two.

It’s off to Adams and the villains start in on the leg….which goes nowhere as it’s quickly back to Clark for the Meltdown. For some reason there’s no cover so Muta mists the referee by mistake. Vampiro breaks up High Times but the Harris Twins of all people return to give Clark an H Bomb, setting up the moonsault for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D-. Good grief I can’t stand Vampiro. Every time I see him in a match, cutting a promo or just being there in general I can’t stand him. Now he gets a title, though given how insane this division has been lately, I can’t imagine him holding onto it for that long. The worst part here is the Harris Twins vs. Kronik, which could set a new standard for horrible.

Booker says Jarrett will have to kill him to take the title. Don’t hate the player, hate the game. As usual, this is a feud that is totally fine and has told a completely acceptable story of the old champion getting annoyed as the new star. The knee injury is find for a plot point to advance the story as well. However, almost no one remembers this because of how ridiculous the rest of this show is, which is really a shame.

Quick recap of the triple threat match, which is designed to look like a SHOOT. Not a “shoot”, but a SHOOT. They’ve been arguing over who has to do the job (using that term) and it’s going over the heads of 99% of the audience who just wants to see people fight.

Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner vs. Goldberg

The winner gets the title shot next month. No Goldberg to start due to the motorcycle accident. Tony tells us to pay extra attention to see if there’s anything out of the ordinary. Nash takes him outside to start and sends Steiner hard into the barricade. Here’s a taped up Goldberg about a minute in to go after Nash with a chair. With Nash down on the floor, Steiner clotheslines Goldberg and drops an elbow for two.

Goldberg comes back with a flying shoulder and the Bret Killer kick, drawing Nash up from the apron for a big staredown. Hudson tells stories about Starrcade 1988 (yes 1988) when Nash was on the booking committee and put himself over Goldberg. Steiner comes back in to save Goldberg and gets two off a belly to belly. Tony interprets Steiner yelling at the referee as him not being on the same page with everyone else.

Goldberg suplexes Steiner down but Nash clotheslines them both. A big boot drops Goldberg but the Jackknife is broken up. It looked like a simple counter but IT’S A SWERVE because it’s really him not following the script. Russo, in his MANLY sleeveless shirt, tells Goldberg to get back in but Goldberg walks to the back.

The announcers freak out that this is Goldberg not following the script, even though it looked like a pretty basic counter to the powerbomb. I love how we’re supposed to buy Kevin Nash and SCOTT STEINER as the professionals here. Tony: “What are they going to do now? Improvise?” This is just so bizarre to hear because it’s clear that they’re trying to sound like they’re shooting. There are shows where you can hear the raw audio and it sounds NOTHING like this, mainly because the announcers aren’t very good actors.

Midajah comes out as Steiner takes Snake Eyes. The referee goes down and Midajah hits Nash low to give Scott two. Nash fails at a DDT and goes after Midajah so Steiner grabs a sleeper. That goes nowhere so Nash kicks him in the face and the Jackknife is good for the pin. And that’s a shoot of course.

Rating: F. I can’t get mad at this. I’m trying and I just can’t do it. Stuff like the Hogan stuff last month and the Russo destroying Flair nonsense makes me angry but this was just……dumb. This felt like seeing a kid do something he wasn’t supposed to do and then listening to the ridiculous explanation that they come up with to try and get out of it. Instead of getting mad at them, it’s almost amusing to see them trying so hard to be clever and leaving so many holes in the story along the way.

I don’t think I have to explain why this was stupid and why it completely defeats the point of professional wrestling in the first place, but I really can’t get mad at it. Maybe it’s the shoot interviews that set it up or maybe I’ve just reached the point where Russo isn’t worth getting annoyed at anymore. It’s one thing to yell and rave about something stupid when it’s clearly for one person’s (namely Russo) benefit. Instead, this felt like Russo actually thought he had a good idea but he’s too stupid to realize how bad it was.

After sitting through the first two hours of this show, there are so many other things to get mad at. Like Judy Bagwell on a pole for instance. That felt much more cruel and low brow than this because it was all about Judy’s looks. The Hancock stuff is stupid because it’s not something I’m ever going to believe. This on the other hand felt like they were trying for something interesting and just failed, which is a lot harder to get mad about. It’s still stupid, but Judy Bagwell on a Pole is the far more infamous moment for a reason: that was lame and stupid whereas this was more a failure, which I can live with much easier.

Finally, this is a rare occasion where watching the TV leading up to it helps a lot. They basically said “yeah we’re going to do something stupid” for the last three weeks and then this is what we got. With the Hogan vs. Jarrett mess last month they treated it seriously and then did the stupid shoot. This time they basically advertised a screwy finish and you were watching to see how bad it was. On top of that, as lame as it was, you actually got a match. Steiner vs. Nash isn’t great but it’s better than “pin me, pay me.” It was a lame idea and didn’t work for most of the fans, but this could have been WAY worse.

Tony throws us to the recap video for the World Tag Team Title match, meaning Booker vs. Jarrett. I guess it’s the Andre the Giant coming out in him. We’ve covered this already: Booker won the title last month so Jeff is trying to get it back by injuring Booker’s knee in advance.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jarrett is challenging and Booker’s knee is in horrible shape coming in. Booker fights out of the corner to start and quickly takes it to the floor to send Jeff into the barricade. Back in and the champ crotches him against the post (Madden: “That’s a walk down Slapnuts Boulevard.”) but the missile dropkick hurts his knee again. You know you don’t have to ask Jeff to work on a limb twice so he wraps the knee around the post.

A chair shot crushes the knee even more and Booker gets caught in a half crab. That goes as far as a half crab is going to go so Booker grabs the spinning sunset flip out of the corner for two. A double clothesline puts both guys down and the knee is suddenly fine enough for an ax kick and Spinarooni. There goes the referee and Jeff blasts the knee with the guitar. Jeff grabs a bad looking Figure Four for WAY too long until Booker grabs the rope. The referee breaking the hold ticks Jeff off so we get a second ref bump.

Booker’s knee is fine again and they set up a table at ringside, only to have Booker do something like a Book End off the apron through said table. Jeff hits the new referee with a chair and then Strokes Booker onto the chair for two from a fresh ref. Booker tries a neckbreaker which turns into a Diamond Cutter (to be fair how often do you see a main event swinging neckbreaker?) onto the chair for two. The Book End retains the title.

Rating: C. This was fine, albeit overbooked. Booker vs. Jarrett is a good example of a pairing that really doesn’t need a lot of extras on the side and they would have been better just having a wrestling match. The ref bumps got annoying in a hurry but that’s the main event style of the time. Not a great match or anything, but it really needed to be something more simple.

The fans bail out immediately and pelt trash into the ring to end this mess.

Overall Rating: F+. I’ve heard this called one of the worst shows of all time, maybe even THE worst of all time and it just isn’t that bad. I wouldn’t even call it the worse show of the summer as Great American Bash offered NOTHING of value. This show had an entertaining opener and a totally fine main event which more than make this a better show than some of the others of this era.

Now that being said, this is another disaster on Russo’s watch because he can’t just leave well enough alone and let the show work. It’s not a good show but for the most part everything goes by fast enough (longest match is the main event at just under fifteen minutes) that it doesn’t really infuriate me. Stuff like the Judy Bagwell match and the Canadian Rules match (which at least got a really good reaction) are really more things you just roll your eyes at and move on to the next match.

The show is really bad, but its reputation is far worse than it actually is. At least with this one you have some entertaining matches and a feeling that they’re trying to do something positive instead of flipping the fans off and laughing at them for not getting behind the ideas. There are still WAY more problems here that need to be fixed and this show was horrible, but somehow it’s an improvement over some of the other stuff they’ve done this year.

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