Checked Out The Booker T Documentary On The Network
I’m really digging these short form documentary like this one and the one on the Usos. They’re not the kind of people that are going to get a full three hour version (well Booker might someday) and these things are really well done and give you everything you could want to know. It doesn’t hurt that they probably cost about $18 to produce. Check these things out as they run half an hour and do what they’re supposed to do.
Thunder – September 23, 1999: Why Do These People Have Jobs?
Thunder Date: September 23, 1999
Location: Norfolk Scope, Norfolk, Virginia
Attendance: 3,782
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko
We’re coming off a very welcome week break from this show due to a hurricane last week. This past Monday’s show was more of the same from WCW as the company made sure the young and hard working guys were stuck on the other side of the show from the main event stars, who had to be there to draw the audience. Let’s get to it.
After the usual opening from the announcers, we look at Chavo putting Psychosis in a hair vs. mask match against Kidman on Monday.
Lodi vs. Kidman
After a hug with his brother/I don’t really want to know what else, Lodi fires off some knees into the ribs. A drop toehold puts Kidman down and Lodi gets in a quick spank for some alleged comedy. That earns Lodi a dropkick in the face and a clothesline to the floor, setting up a big dive onto both blonds. Lenny offers a distraction and Lodi takes over with a legdrop and a suplex for two. A bulldog gets the same after a failed Kidman comeback attempt and we hit the chinlock.
That goes nowhere so Kidman is sent outside for a brawl with the champ. Lodi actually dives onto both of them to take over again (was he ever out of control? Well maybe back in the Flock days). Back in and Kidman hits his Bodog and does the usual to escape a powerbomb. Lodi is no Lenny it seems. Lenny offers yet another distraction to break up the Shooting Star, drawing out Eddie Guerrero to take care of him. This brings out Chavo to talk trash and then leave. Ok then. Lenny gets on the apron but Kidman whips Lodi into him, setting up the BK Bomb for the pin.
Rating: D+. Not much to this one but that’s almost always the case with the Lodi matches. That being said, it’s very refreshing to actually get to the end of a match instead of just seeing Sid come down to do the same thing every single week and often times in the same show. Lenny is getting up a pretty big set of challengers to go after the belt and I’m getting into his title reign.
Harlem Heat is shown walking in the back but they turn a corner and brawling noises are heard. Sid and Steiner walk around the same corner from the other way.
We see Sid and Goldberg yelling at each other from Nitro.
Tenay (not Gene for some reason) calls out Harlem Heat but only gets Booker. Apparently Stevie is on his way to the hospital as Sid and Steiner gave Stevie a bump on the head. That’s quite the speedy ambulance. Anyway, Booker wants Sid tonight to prove that this winning streak is a fraud.
Brandi Alexander vs. Mona
A lot of posing delays the start of the match as Tenay tells us to go on the World Wide Web for more information on the WCW Mayhem video game. Mona gets taken down in a test of strenght about a minute after the bell. They roll into a quick pinfall reversal sequence until Mona gets caught in a wristlock.
A dropkick puts Brandi on the floor but she pulls the blonde outside for a clothesline. Back in and Brandi stomps away before posing some more. She gets two off a gutwrench suplex but Mona backflips into a headscissors followed by some forearms to the jaw. Not that it matters as Brandi counters a monkey flip and puts her feet on the ropes for the pin. Uh….upset?
Rating: C-. The match was acceptable but these stand alone matches can only get them so far. At the end of the day, what am I supposed to think of this match? Mona beat her two months ago and now Brandi evens things up. There’s no title to fight over and no one else for them to face, so there’s nothing here but a decent match and a pretty Mona. Did Mona ever even face Madusa?
The split second the pin goes down, they go to an ad for Hogan and Sting videos. That was one of the fastest cuts I’ve ever seen.
Mayhem ad.
We see Karagias pinning Blitzkrieg to earn his title shot tonight.
Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Saturn
Headlock from Saturn to start followed by a hammerlock as they hit the mat for a wrestling sequence. Back up and a big clothesline drops Guerrero and it’s off to an armbar. Chavo tries to get underneath Saturn, earning him a good stomping. Sometimes that’s all you need to do. Back up again and a German suplex sends Chavo flying and he rolls out to the floor for a breather. Chavo gets back in but quickly flips over to the apron. He can’t ram Saturn into the buckle though and gets suplexed from the apron back inside. Other than a few quickly broken holds, it’s all Saturn so far.
Chavo finally jumps over a charge in the corner and dropkicks the knee before a clothesline puts Saturn on the floor. A nice plancha gets two back inside and we hit the chinlock. Saturn doesn’t like to rest though and gets up for a big t-bone suplex, followed by a forearm and another suplex. He loads up a superplex (logical next step) but Eddie runs out to swing at him. Unfortunately he misses Saturn and knocks Chavo to the mat. Somehow the referee doesn’t see Eddie coming in and dropkicking Saturn, allowing Chavo to collapse head first onto Saturn’s crotch for the pin.
Rating: C. Can Saturn please get a big win, or even a win in general? This wasn’t much to see but Saturn’s suplexes looked good. They’re setting up something interesting with the Animals vs. the Revolution, even though they both should be moving up the ladder a bit. The same idea worked with the Nation vs. DX in 1998 and stealing an idea only a year old isn’t bad for WCW. Would Eddie and Benoit be HHH and Rock in that analogy?
Here are Sid, Steiner and Charles Robinson with something to say. Sid talks about a restraining order against Goldberg and the US Title match at Halloween Havoc is off if there’s contact. Booker and Goldberg are stupid for meeting kids and doing all that other hero stuff before saying tonight, it’s 100-0. Robinson even has the next sign ready. So Robinson is some freaky Ric Flair and Lodi crossbreed?
Coach Buzz Stern is going to bring Luther Biggs to Thunder. Just get it over with so this can mean nothing.
We recap Sting vs. Benoit and the fallout with Sting attacking Hogan’s knee later in the night. They’re really pushing that six man tag so points for trying to build to a big match.
This Week In WCW Motorsports.
Prince Iaukea vs. Van Hammer
You know, I was just starting to think this show wasn’t half bad. That’s what I get for even thinking for a second that this show isn’t a horrible abomination. I need to stay more vigilant. The Prince jumps him from behind and actually gets two off a rollup. Hammer slams him down but gets small packaged for another near fall, followed by a headbutt. At least Iaukea is being more aggressive. He’s still horrible to watch but he’s aggressive. Hammer tries an Irish whip but gets poked in the eye for his efforts.
Yet another rollup gets two as dear goodness there’s an actual story to this thing. Hammer gets tired of this match and kicks Prince in the face before hanging him in a Tree of Woe and choking him from the floor. When you’re ripping off Rick Steiner moves, it’s time to hang it up buddy. A few slams set up a few chinlocks on Iaukea but he finally fights up and kicks Hammer low. I know I said just make it legal already and it seems like they actually have. Prince hits a Samoan drop but walks into a spinebuster, setting up the cobra clutch slam for the pin.
Rating: D. Well it was a bit better than a squash but that doesn’t mean it’s an interesting or even good match. I did like the idea of Iaukea just going for fast wins because he can’t go toe to toe with someone Hammer’s size, but at the end of the day it’s still Hammer and Iaukea getting five minutes on live television. There’s no way this can be considered a good thing.
Hammer says he wants a US Title shot on Nitro. I can’t decide if Sid vs. Hammer on live TV is worse than Hammer vs. Prince on live TV and for some reason I’m going to get to find out. I hate my life.
Revolution video.
Eddie Guerrero vs. Rick Steiner
Rick runs his mouth about Booker to start and still wants people to bite him. Eddie can’t take Steiner down either from behind or by the leg and I have a bad feeling about where this is going. He gets behind Steiner again but this time Rick switches over and throws Eddie down with a German suplex.
Steiner hammers away in the corner and starts ripping at Eddie’s face. A chinlock goes nowhere so Eddie is dumped to the floor. He manages to reverse a whip for the closest thing to offense he’s had so far. Naturally that’s all Rick is going to give him and it’s time for choking with a cord. Back in and Steiner slaps him before shrugging off right hands to the face. A spinebuster plants Eddie for two but he gets back up with a hurricanrana. Cue Sid to chokeslam Eddie off the top for the DQ.
Rating: D+. Is there an emergency button for Steiner to push when he’s actually having to sell? Have we ever even been given a reason why Sid and Steiner got together? Given that we’re still waiting on a reason for Nash to join up with Hogan and surrender the title when he had gotten away with everything (my goodness that sounds like forever ago), I wouldn’t hold my breath. This match showed that not even Eddie Guerrero can save Rick Steiner, which is all you need to know.
Kidman makes the save and gets powerbombed. If Lenny hadn’t done it recently, that would drive me a lot crazier.
CALL THE HOTLINE! SEE HOW ELSE WE’RE GOING TO SCREW THIS UP!
Cruiserweight Title: Evan Karagias vs. Lenny Lane
Karagias is challenging after beating Blitzkrieg on Nitro. Lodi’s sign: “Lenny is hard to beat.” Lenny takes Evan down to start and cranks on a hammerlock (popular move tonight) but has to run away from some right hands as we take a very early break. Back with the champ holding a chinlock until Evan fights up and gets sent to the apron. A springboard cross body gets two on the champ but he sends Evan into the buckle to put him down again. Lenny’s rather suggestive cover gets two before he drops Evan with a gorilla press.
That’s about it for the offense though as a double clothesline puts both guys down. Evan makes his comeback but gets caught up top. The champ’s superplex attempt is quickly countered with a sitout superbomb for no cover. That might be a good thing as it would make Evan look pretty lame to not be able to pin Lenny after a spot that big. He heads up top again but Lodi finally does something by tripping him to the mat to give Lenny a two count. Back up and Evan dropkicks the brothers together for two. Lodi gets back up so Lenny catapults Evan into him, setting up the Skull Crushing Finale to retain.
Rating: C. You know, Lenny isn’t that bad in the ring. Yeah he’s a Chris Jericho look-a-like and has a gimmick that had to be toned WAY down, but his matches are far from horrible. The division is starting to round back into some form (albeit not quite its previous glory but that’s not fair to ask) and beating Lane might be a big deal when it happens.
We see Hammer’s challenge for the US Champion from earlier tonight.
US Title: Sid Vicious vs. Booker T.
Booker is challenging but comes out alone while Sid has Steiner in his corner. Nick Patrick comes out and won’t let Charles Robinson referee the match. If Robinson is this corrupt, how does he still have a job? Granted I could say that about so many people in WCW that this really shouldn’t surprise me. Robinson stays at ringside as Booker hammers on Sid but charges into an elbow in the corner, knocking him out to the floor. Booker kicks him into the crowd and is getting in more offense than anyone has on Sid in weeks. By that I mean a few shots of course because Sid is a STAR.
They fight into the crowd and it’s the walking around the arena style. Back to ringside with Sid in control and dropping Booker across the barricade. The fans chant for Goldberg but he’s too important to appear on this show. Steiner gets in some cheap shots but Booker comes back with some kicks to the champ. Sid of course no sells but is nice enough to stay down for two off a missile dropkick, only to have Steiner pull Patrick to the floor. Robinson comes in, along with Steiner, as Sid chokeslams Booker, setting up a double powerbomb to retain the title.
Rating: D. Grumble grumble, star power, grumble grumble, Sid and Steiner are old. This was actually a bit better than most Sid matches as Booker was able to carry things far better than most of his opponents. However, Booker was never a real threat and the three villains made sure of it. Sid popping up after the ax kick really doesn’t surprise me but it still gets annoying in a hurry.
Sid yells for Goldberg to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. This show was a bit better than usual, but it’s still nothing I’d want to see. The stories have thankfully calmed down after all those months of horrid, but that still doesn’t help the mostly below average wrestling. We’re just waiting on the guys to start tearing the house down but there’s always something holding them back. Once they finally just start letting these stories go somewhere, WCW could potentially get hot again. That’s one of the things that makes their downfall so frustrating: there are ways around some of the problems (not all of them of course) but they just kept wasting the potential.
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Thunder Date: September 9, 1999
Location: Wendler Arena, Saginaw, Michigan
Attendance: 4,653
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay
We’re into a new era here in WCW as I’m convinced the company gave up at the last Nitro. Unfortunately that means we have a taped Thunder to sit through, even though the previous show felt like the taped episode. I know I keep saying that things can’t get any worse and I’ve been wrong every single time. Let’s get to it.
This show is in memory of Mark Curtis who died of cancer shortly before this show.
Buff Bagwell vs. Barbarian
Buff poses, then locks up, then poses, then gets kicked in the face. I like this Barbarian’s style. He hammers away with every sort of strike you can think of, only to miss a clothesline and get dropkicked out to the floor. After a chat with Jimmy (who apparently speaks monster), Barbarian comes back in and gets stomped down yet again. Jimmy distracts Buff (like it’s that hard) so Barbarian can hammer away.
Even Hart gets in some choking on the ropes as he continues to be one of the hardest working manager in wrestling. Barbarian gets two off a side slam and it’s already time for Buff’s comeback with a cross body and neckbreaker for two of his own. Jimmy throws something in but Buff intercepts it and knocks Barbarian cold (1. Some hero. 2. Does no one remember racial stereotypes?) for the pin.
Rating: D. Maybe Berlyn is right and we should all start speaking German. They couldn’t even let the guy who is supposed to be the hero win with his cool looking finisher? If there’s a guy who had one of the easiest paths to being a face it’s Bagwell, but instead he has to cheat to win a match to set up a match where he’s supposed to be fighting for America. These are the kind of small things that really shouldn’t be happening but WCW seems to think no one is going to notice and/or care.
Clip of Berlyn from Nitro.
Now here’s something that has no business on this show: a geniunely good video history of Sting and Luger, dating back to their arrival in the Crockett territory and including clips from their time together as a team (including Crockett Cup footage) and their feud over the World Title.
Van Hammer vs. Blitzkrieg
Hammer starts fast by throwing Blitzkrieg across the ring like the cruiserweight he is…..and talks to the wrong camera. Blitzkrieg tries to get in some kicks and speed things up but dives into something like the Eye of the Storm (a Razor’s Edge but Hammer spins him around and drops him without ever leaving his feet). Hammer nails a running corner clothesline and drops a leg (on the chest but close enough) for two. A sunset flip goes as well for Blitzkrieg as you would expect and Hammer suplexes him down again.
Another suplex drops Blitzy again and Hammer goes up for a Swanton of all things. Since it takes him as long as frozen molasses going uphill, Blitzkrieg rolls away and hits a standing moonsault. He tries again since nothing else has worked but only hits mat, allowing Hammer to throw him around the ring again. They head outside to kill even more time, and so Hammer can no sell a moonsault off the apron. Back in and the cobra clutch slam ends Blitzkrieg with ease.
Rating: D-. So we had a long and boring squash with Blitzkrieg getting destroyed for the sake of Van Hammer, who hasn’t been going anywhere and won’t be going anywhere for the sake of filling in time on a taped Thunder. And for some reason it got over five minutes, just so Hammer could no sell Blitzkrieg’s big spot and win with a move as lame as a cobra clutch slam? All hail WCW.
Video on Page vs. Goldberg.
Video on who was driving the Hummer. Why am I supposed to still care about this?
Chris Benoit/Perry Saturn/Shane Douglas vs. Chris Adams/Steven Regal/Dave Taylor
Regal and Benoit trade headbutts to start as the fans chant USA. Off to Taylor for some hard European uppercuts before a double tag quickly brings in Saturn and Adams. Perry slams Adams down and drops him on his head for a pretty scary semi-botch. It’s off to Shane for some stomping as he still wrestles like a heel after shoehorning his way onto this team.
Ever the genius, Shane goes over into the corner and gets nailed by the Union Jack to give the Europeans control. The triple teaming only lasts a few moments but does include a save by Saturn. Shane rolls over for the hot tag off to Benoit and everything breaks down. Benoit and Adams stay in the ring and it’s a German suplex into the Swan Dive and Crossface for the submission.
Rating: D+. Really standard six man here as Benoit continues to be the only one in the team that gets to show off in the ring. Malenko has the skill but doesn’t get to do much, Saturn is more flashy than skilled at this point and Shane is a talker who is only average in the ring. I do however like the Europeans as the talented losers who are always going to look at least passable.
Lodi vs. Kaz Hayashi
This match….again? Kaz goes after Lenny but Lodi screws up the double team attempt. The spot is oh so hilarious that they do the same thing again until Lenny finally proves his worth by distracting Kaz long enough for Lodi to grab a suplex. Lodi takes him to the floor and sends him into the barricade a few times before heading back inside for the basic stuff he can do, mainly because he’s just a comedy character who is wrestling to continue an angle that should have died months ago.
A clothesline and powerslam get two on Kaz and a middle rope bulldog gets the same. We get the old Earl Hebner spot as Kaz tries a sunset flip but Lenny and Lodi grab hands, only to have the referee kick them apart for two. Kaz gets two more off a brainbuster before Lenny gets on the apron again but Kaz sends Lodi into his partner, setting up a rollup for the pin.
Rating: D+. The worst part about this match is it was fairly entertaining and had a story to it: whenever Lodi was on his own he beat Kaz up but whenever he tried to have Lenny help, everything fell apart. That being said, it’s fairly stupid to have Kaz in trouble against Lodi before he has a title shot this Sunday.
Lenny tries some elbows on Kaz but keeps hitting mat.
Video on Sting and Hogan, who are suddenly friends after all those years of like, hating each other.
Sid Vicious vs. Adrian Byrd/Bobby Blaze
Both guys are allowed in at once and it makes about as much difference as you would expect. The powerbomb ends Byrd in less than a minute.
Blaze gets the same treatment and Charles Robinson gets to hold up the signs. Sid says his usual schtick about being the Millennium Man.
Here’s the Revolution with Benoit missing the US Title and Dean carrying the TV Title for no apparent reason. You would think Saturn, as in the guy challenging for it on Sunday, would be holding it but I’m not sure WCW remembers what they’re doing that far in advance. Dean rambles about the title belonging to people like them and says Rick can get it back in a match tonight, one on one with Sid staying in the back. Shane does a bit better as he talks about the Revolution being addicted to gold and not stopping until they have all the titles.
Barry Windham vs. Booker T.
Booker seems to like the look of that title belt. Kendall tries to validate his employment by offering a distraction, allowing Barry to get the early advantage. Booker hammers away with his usual array of strikes and the flying forearm. They head outside and both sets of partners (well partner in Booker’s case) get in some cheap shots.
Back in and Barry nails a DDT, probably the only non-striking move he can do at this point. Windham hammers away and shocks me with a suplex before throwing Booker outside for a Redneck beating. Back in again and Barry slowly stomps away, only to miss an elbow. Mr. T. comes up with his series of kicks and we even get some breakdancing. He loads up the missile dropkick but the Rednecks come in for the DQ.
Rating: D+. Somehow this is one of the better matches of the night. I’m fine with Harlem Heat being back together, but it astounds me that the Rednecks are the best team they can find for them to chase. Kendall isn’t getting a rub out of this as he continues to be one of the most useless guys I’ve seen in years. Can we get to something else for these guys already?
Stevie tries to make the save and gets beaten down as well.
Clip of Sting getting laid out on Monday.
TV Title: Dean Malenko vs. Rick Steiner
Dean is challenging but has the belt, which apparently he stole at some point earlier in the night. Rick jumps him before the bell and plants him with a suplex as we already take a break. Back with Dean nailing a dropkick and getting punched square in the face for his efforts. Cue Sid as Malenko rolls Steiner up, only to kick him off and right into the chokeslam for the fast DQ. The match might have been four minutes, counting commercial.
Shane comes in and gets beaten down as well. Benoit is able to grab the Crossface on Sid but Steiner makes the save. Cue Saturn so we can see the ENTIRE REVOLUTION getting beaten down by these two main event legends. Yes I said MAIN EVENT LEGENDS, meaning only other MAIN EVENT LEGENDS can fight them because that’s how WCW works. Saturn finally backdrops Sid to the floor and Steiner bails.
Goldberg vs. Bam Bam Bigelow
From something nearly on top of a pay per view to main eventing a taped Thunder. Bigelow jumps him during the weapons check so Goldberg easily slams him down. We get some Zbyszko level stalling from Bam Bam on the floor before Goldberg catches a cross body attempt in midair. Goldberg just holds him there before a World’s Strongest Slam sets up a bad looking armbar.
The referee gets knocked down before Goldberg knocks Bigelow silly with a clothesline. Bigelow hammers away with offense that doesn’t require a referee bump. Goldberg no sells everything and hits the Bret Killer kick, drawing in Page. The referee, apparently in a coma by this point, is still down as Goldberg spears Bigelow down. Page bails to the floor as Goldberg Jackhammers Bam Bam for the pin.
Rating: D. The match wasn’t any good but Goldberg was showing the old fire from when he was World Champion. When he gets that power game going, he’s one of the most awesome guys you’ll ever see and he was knocking Bigelow silly out there. Page running in was pretty obvious, just like the fact that he’s going to get mauled on Sunday.
Page nails Goldberg with a chair but runs away to end the show.
Overall Rating: F. See, Thunder does offer a legitimate alternative to Nitro. While Nitro is a horrible show because it’s illogical and repetitive, Thunder is a horrible show because it’s incredibly boring and doesn’t have good matches. They really need to get to the Russo era so we can get something more interesting instead of just bad. Total waste of TV time here and I don’t want to see Fall Brawl.
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Monday Nitro – August 9, 1999: A Show That Needs No Introduction
Monday Nitro #200 Date: August 9, 1999
Location: Idaho Center, Boise, Idaho
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone
We’re at a milestone show here and there’s a pretty well known main event. At the moment we have the battle of the old guys with feuds ranging from Kevin Nash vs. Hollywood Hogan, Rick Steiner vs. Goldberg and Sting vs. Sid Vicious. That sounds like a reason to mix those guys up in a big match. Oh and we have country music with Chad Brock. Yeah I don’t remember him either. This is also the go home show for Road Wild. Let’s get to it.
Quick recap of the end of last week’s show.
Tony is back on commentary with no reason given for his absence. He does however have an announcement: Dusty Rhodes is now head of the WCW Championship Committee. Wasn’t he last seen as part of the NWO?
Norman Smiley/Lash Leroux/Prince Iaukea vs. Vampiro/Insane Clown Posse
Uh…yay. Raven is in the corner and has officially named the team the Dead Pool. Do they like chimichangas? Vampiro and Lash get things going with some chops back and forth. Tony is back to his old standard by randomly talking about Nash vs. Hogan. Off to the Prince for his selection of right hands but Vampiro hits a kind of throwing powerbomb. You would think Norman or Lash would have done something given that he powerbombed Iaukea out of their corner, but my guess is they’re trying to figure out why the Insane Clown Posse is wrestling a match in Idaho.
Violent J. (called Jack Jeckyl by Tony. To be fair that’s what it says on his jersey) hits a decent suplex before playing Neidhart to Vampiro’s Hart in a Hart Attack. Shaggy comes in for a bad looking DDT but Prince sweeps the legs to take over. To make things worse, Shaggy’s shorts are falling down. Norman tries to come in to help Iaukea but it just allows Vampiro to hit him low.
J. drops a leg to the chest but hurts his head with a headbutt to the Prince. At least he knows his stereotypes. They head outside with Vampiro throwing Iaukea into the steps. Back in and Shaggy misses a guillotine legdrop, allowing the hot tag to Norman. A big old spinning slam drops Shaggy and everything breaks down. The fans are actually WAY into this one. Vampiro suplexes Lash down and J. adds a moonsault for the pin.
Rating: C-. The Clowns are an interesting case as they actually have some training so it’s WAY better than when celebrities have matches on Raw, but I’d still be hard pressed to call them good. They can do some very basic stuff like suplexes and the moonsault was acceptable, but they’d be lost trying to do more than a four minute match without people there to help them. Case in point, this match worked for the most part because the Clowns weren’t in a good chunk of it and the wrestlers carried it. The crowd helped a lot too as they were into the match, but the wrestling was nothing great.
Nitro Girls.
The Revolution is in the back with Dusty and ask him when things are going to change around here. Dusty says in due time but gets cut off by David Flair and Torrie Wilson. Dusty is called an old man so Benoit slaps the Crossface on David. Apparently the way to make things change is through violence because that earned Benoit a US Title shot. It’s about time someone realized David and his dad had no authority anymore and they could get the US Title off of him in about 10 seconds.
Curt Hennig/Barry Windham vs. Public Enemy
The Rednecks have a new song called Good Old Boys, which is nowhere near as catchy. Tony starts talking about Chad Brock and actually gives us a reason for him to be here: he used to train at the Power Plant and actually was in an eight man tag on Saturday Night back in 1996. That still doesn’t make me want to see him but WCW never really cared what fans thought. Hennig throws Rocco around the ring to start but eats a boot in the corner.
Off to Grunge who has the same luck as Hennig when Windham blasts him with a lariat. Kendall actually does something by tripping up Grunge to keep the Rednecks in control. We hear about Brock even more as Johnny and Curt double clothesline each other. It’s a double tag as Public Enemy takes over with their usual brawling before a flip dive puts Barry through the table. Not that it matters though as Curt nails Grunge with the cowbell for the pin.
Rating: D. The Rednecks seem to be in decline as there isn’t much for them to do anymore. If the best they can come up with is having Curt feud with the country singer coming in to perform, they need to just disband the team now or let Hennig and Windham be a regular tag team. It was a fun idea while it lasted but there’s nothing for the team to do right now.
Little Jeanie vs. Mona
Tony tries to tell us how easy it is to order a WCW PPV as this is sounding more and more desperate every week. Jeanie never did anything that I can find. Apparently Mona was a powerlifter in her younger days, which isn’t something you would expect out of someone her size. They hit the mat to start and trade some hammerlocks and armbars. Jeanie isn’t half bad out there and takes a decent monkey flip to send her outside.
The match stalls for a bit as they trade places, only to have Jeanie choke a bit on the way back in. Mona gets two off a sunset flip and the fans give her a good reaction. Granted it likely has something to do with the short skirt flipping over but a pop is better than nothing. Back up and a dropkick to the head sends Jeanie into the corner. For a sweet ending, Mona puts on an Indian deathlock but grabs Jeanie’s shoulders and rolls her over, bridging the legs into the air for a pin.
Rating: C+. Shockingly good match here and I’m surprised Jeanie never did anything else. She needed some work but with more experience and some polish she could have been something decent. Mona of course would have her success in the near future and it’s easy to see why off this match. This was a big, nice surprise.
Brandi Alexander, a chick that Mona beat up before, comes in but takes a clothesline from Mona.
Video on Hogan vs. Nash.
Hogan is in the back when his son Nick comes in. Hogan is in the NWO gear and Nick wants to know why his dad didn’t wear the red and yellow that Nick packed for him. We hear a noise though and Hulk runs out of the room, only to get laid out by Nash, Sid and Steiner. They beat him out to the ring but Sting and Goldberg make a quick save.
This is apparently enough for Hogan to put his career on the line on Saturday and makes a challenge for a six man tag. Nash says it’s on, but Sting wants Nash’s career on the line too. That’s cool as well, but Goldberg tops them all. He says Steiner doesn’t have anything to put on the line at Road Wild so he’ll just have to beat Steiner up.
Is there any question why the title was retired soon after this? I mean good grief it’s one thing to not acknowledge that someone is a champion but to flat out say that the belt is worthless? The worst part: you know Goldberg never got any flack for that backstage. Why would he anyway? The title has been dying a brutal death since Steiner became champion and just brutalized everyone he’s fought in meaningless matches.
That belt could be used for people like the Revolution, Booker T., Bagwell, even Disco Inferno or Cat. But instead it’s being held by a guy no one cares about while Goldberg says the belt doesn’t matter. Stupid decisions like this are among the biggest reasons WCW went under: they didn’t care about anyone but the old guys and they think people care about guys like Rick Steiner because he was a big deal nine years ago. I really can’t get over that stupid line. I agree Goldberg is above the TV Title, but did he have to point out that it’s worthless in general?
US Title: David Flair vs. Chris Benoit
Maybe this can make me feel better. Heenan’s tongue is falling out of his mouth over Torrie’s outfit. Little Naitch is ejected as referee and Nick Patrick will be taking over. Isn’t he almost just as corrupt? Flair immediately bails to the floor and tries to leave, only to be thrown back in by Malenko and Saturn. Douglas was there too but he was too busy reminding us of how great he was in ECW to actually help.
David bails again but is surrounded on the floor. A snap suplex sends the champ flying and Benoit slaps him a few times. Benoit is just toying with him here. Kanyon tries to do a hilarious looking run in (the look on his face was priceless as he looked like he was trying to save a baby from a burning building) but gets stopped by Saturn, allowing Benoit to drop the Swan Dive for the pin and the title.
Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade as it’s clearly not about the wrestling but they did exactly what they were supposed to out there. Benoit FINALLY wins a singles title and gives David exactly what he deserves. Granted it’s about three months too late for it to have the impact they were going for but at least it finally happened.
Page comes in and Rock Bottoms Benoit but thankfully the Revolution runs in for the save before Page can ruin the moment. Benoit issues a challenge for Saturday in a No DQ match.
Nitro Girls.
Here’s Savage to reveal who is going to guard George on Saturday, who also drove the Hummer. Gene introduces George as being with him but Savage is alone. After a quick President plug, he promises to kill Rodman on Saturday. Gene gets to the point by asking about the Hummer driver…..and Savage ignores him. One more line about Saturday and we’re done. As I ask myself every week, why do I even bother watching Thunder if they’re going to tease stuff like this and then never follow up?
Chris Adams/Dave Taylor vs. Eddie Guerrero/Rey Mysterio Jr.
It’s Eddie and Taylor to get things going, but first they have to see who the fans are behind. The stalling continues as we’re nearly two minutes into the match with barely any contact. Taylor actually snaps off a headscissors and dropkick to send Eddie to the floor, drawing some solid booing. You would have thought Eddie would start that way but instead he headscissors Taylor down to take over.
Off to Rey, who is in an orange prison uniform because for some reason in the 90s, that was considered cool. Adams runs him over with a shoulder and a powerslam gets two. He misses a top rope splash though and Rey hits a Lionsault, on the same night that Chris Jericho was debuting on Monday Night Raw. Adams pops back up with that sweet superkick of his for two before catapulting him into the wrong corner.
Dave finally charges into a boot in the corner and the prison enthusiast rolls over for the hot tag to Eddie. Everything breaks down and Eddie dives through the ropes to take out Taylor. Adams is all alone, setting up a Mysterio top rope hurricanrana, followed by the Frog Splash for the pin.
Rating: C+. What is with this show tonight? They’ve been nailing the wrestling all night with everyone clicking in the ring. Mysterio and Guerrero being a good tag team isn’t a surprise given how much they’ve worked together in the past. Adams and Taylor were fine in this role as two guys that can work well with anyone. If this was what Nitro was like until a big main event, I’d have far fewer complaints.
Speaking of complaints, cue the Dead Pool to jump Mysterio and Guerrero, only to have Kidman make the save. Six man on Saturday it seems.
Gene brings out the Rednecks, who imply they were with the Dixie Chicks and Shania Twain last night. Apparently they were scheduled to perform Good Old Boys live but Chad Brock has replaced them. Seriously, this is the best thing they can come up with? Ignore the fact that the fans booed Brock’s name in general but cheered when Hennig promised to beat him up. Why do I have a feeling this was translated as “See??? THE FANS RESPONDED TO HIS NAME! MORE CELEBRITIES!”
Kidman vs. Disco Inferno
Over halfway through the show, Tony sends out get well wishes to Scott Hudson. Gee that’s nice of him. Did we ever get a reason why Tony was gone in the first place though? Kidman starts fast with a dropkick and the slingshot headscissors, potentially causing lethal hair damage. Disco pops back up and throws him over the top before grabbing a Russian legsweep back inside.
The chinlock is broken in about five seconds and Kidman nails a quick clothesline. Disco continues his hot pace (maybe he has a fever?) with a swinging neckbreaker and a hot (I’ve got something here!) shot for two. Kidman comes back with a Sky High, which is a move I really would like to see someone use as a finisher full time. And I mean someone that matters, not Titus O’Neil.
Kidman ducks his head though and eats the AWESOME jumping piledriver. I know he was a comedy guy but he always had one of the best piledrivers I’ve ever seen. It’s only good for two though so, in another recurring theme tonight, he tries it again, only to have Kidman faceplant him. The Shooting Star is ready but Vampiro runs in for the DQ.
Rating: C. Disco looked great here and continues to be one of the most underrated WCW guys in the ring. Vampiro coming in makes sense and keeps setting up their match on Saturday, though they could have spaced the matches out better on the card. By having them back to back, it runs the risk of overloading people on one feud, and you know there’s a big crowd to see wrestling clowns.
Vampiro plants Kidman with a super Nail in the Coffin. I’m not a Vampiro fan but that looked GREAT, especially Kidman’s head flying up after impact and falling back onto the mat. Disco actually tries to make the save but eats a superkick, drawing out Eddie and Rey for the real save. Disco offers Rey a handshake but Rey is a hugger, sending Disco running away in fear. If a small man in a prison uniform tried to hug me, I’d be a bit nervous too.
The announcers chat about Saturday’s main event.
Scott Norton vs. Buff Bagwell
Vicious runs Delicious over to start and shoulders him to the floor. A clothesline misses though and Buff hits some dropkicks (clearly inspired by his match with Riggs on Thursday) to knock Norton outside. Back in and Bagwell actually uses a dragon screw leg whip. Well that’s some psychology at least.
Norton shrugs it off though and hits his shoulder breaker as we see Cat putting on the red shoes up on the ramp. Bagwell fights out of a neck crank and a cross body actually works. Cue Cat to distract the referee so Onoo can nail Bagwell with the briefcase, giving Norton two. That’s enough to make Miller call his Mama, or come into the ring for a DQ. Ignore the lack of actual contact of course.
Rating: D. Well the good match streak had to die somewhere. This was about as bad as you would have expected as Bagwell just isn’t there in the ring. It makes sense that he was great as a tag guy because he can talk well enough to get on people’s nerves and then hit the Blockbuster for a good looking finish.
Speaking of the Blockbuster, Onoo takes one as Norton chases Cat to the back.
Now for the REAL main event in any event in the country (except whatever the Rosemont Horizon was called at this point because they’re smart enough not to have this nonsense over in that company), here’s…..A SINGER THAT DOESN’T EVEN GET AN INTRODUCTION! Yeah we come back from a break and the song is starting. You know those musical acts that are said to not need an introduction anywhere in the world but for some reason they’re introduced anyway? As in like Elvis, the Rolling Stones, Bruce Springsteen etc? Well apparently Chad Brock is important enough to not actually introduce whatsoever.
He sings, people don’t care, Hennig comes out and jaws with him, the Rednecks and the Revolution come out for a staredown, I’ll never got those seven minutes of my life back.
As if that’s not enough, KISS is coming in two weeks.
Nitro Girls. They haven’t been around as much lately. You know who has been though? Chad Brock.
Kanyon vs. Booker T.
For history’s sake, the Millennium Clock ended right about now. All respective partners are out here with them. It’s Booker in control to start with a back elbow to knock Kanyon to the floor so Stevie can get in some cheap shots of his own. He doesn’t have this whole face thing down yet.
Back in and Kanyon extinguishes half of the Heat with a knee to the ribs and we hit the chinlock. Booker fights up with the usual as they’re clearly flying through this. The barrage of kicks set up the 110th Street Slam but Kanyon pulls the referee in front of a clothesline. The rest of the Triad stops Stevie, allowing Kanyon to nail Booker with the belt, setting up the Flatliner for the pin.
Rating: D+. The match went so fast that there was only so much they could do out there. I’ll let you make your own complaint about Brock taking up their time. This was little more than another way to set up the Tag Team Title match on Saturday, which is about all you can do for a match like that. I’ve seen worse though.
Here’s Rodman to Voodoo Child, so maybe we’ll find out who was driving the Hummer here. Rodman says that this Saturday, George is going to learn that she’s his BEEP. You mean the woman that Rodman, in theory the face in this feud, as in the guy that has kidnapped George and attacked from behind, kidnapped and may have raped? Savage runs out and Rodman, your hero and mine, runs away in fear.
Sting/Goldberg/Hollywood Hogan vs. Rick Steiner/Sid Vicious/Kevin Nash
Nash’s team comes out to the Wolfpack theme but Nash has a Black and White logo on his shirt. I’M SO CONFUSED! Remember that if Nash’s team loses, his career is on the line Saturday. Goldberg comes out to Crush Em, which I like but it doesn’t have the same impact as his old music.
Now we get the big, famous moment here though as Hogan returns to the red and yellow for the first time in over three years. Tony loses his mind as you would expect him to. To their credit, the fans go NUTS in one of the final legitimate shows of emotion you’ll ever find in WCW. I take no shame in admitting that it gave me a big smile too as I grew up a Hulkamaniac and he belongs in the red and yellow. Also, has there ever been a better three man face team in WCW?
Hogan and Steiner get things going and the worthless champion is shoved down. The big boot connects about a minute in and even Heenan is fired up to see Hogan. Some more right hands drop Steiner and the giants take punches of their own. Hogan beats up all three villains on his own and they take a breather on the floor. With Hogan dominating, the fans chant for Goldberg. You know, the guy in a match with someone that has nothing to put up on Saturday.
Goldberg gets the tag and the pop of the night as Nash comes in to face him. Nash hammers away but eats a superkick and suplex as the fans get even louder. You can see Hogan saying “Yeah they popped louder for me brother. I heard them chanting HO-GAN too.” Sid walks into a powerslam and it’s off to Sting, who seems almost out of his league for once. He lays Sid on the top rope for the Stinger Splash but the top rope version gets two to stop the crowd dead.
The referee gets in the way of Nash’s Snake Eyes as someone has exposed the buckle. That earns him a ref bump and Sting hits a pair of Stinger Splashes into the exposed buckle and a third into a more modest buckle. Steiner comes in with a chair but there’s the spear. Hogan takes the chair and cleans house, including knocking Nash willy. Another referee comes out to say Nash is out for the win, putting his career on the line Saturday.
Rating: B-. It’s a very fun match and Hogan coming back in the red and yellow is a big moment. We had a top level WCW face team against the three top heels (since Flair has disappeared) and the crowd went nuts. That brings me to my one big issue with the match: wouldn’t this have made more sense next week?
Next week’s main event would be Hogan vs. Sid for the title, so couldn’t they have swapped that to this week and had the six man after the PPV? With this, whatever they do on Saturday is going to feel like a letdown from this and you get Hogan putting on the red and yellow again after he defeats his “biggest challenge” (work with me here) thanks to the power of the Hulkamaniacs. This took away the drama because you know Hulk Hogan isn’t losing to Nash in this kind of a match. Still though, good moment and a really fun main event.
Overall Rating: B-. Easily the best Nitro in months, but this company is clearly running on borrowed time. The main event scene is dying for some fresh blood and putting Hogan in the old colors is only going to keep him going for so long. Benoit getting the title is a bright spot and at least a sign of hope, but I’m still stuck on that TV Title line. It’s going to take some time to get that back to credibility and Rick Steiner holding it isn’t going to help that. Midcard title problems aside, this show was solid action (mostly) in front of a red hot crowd. They still need to cut back to two hours, but not being horrible is a good start.
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Thunder Date: August 5, 1999
Location: Lacrosse Center, Lacrosse, Wisconsin
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko
We’re coming off an actually decent episode of Nitro, even though it was dominated by the over 40 crowd. Ok maybe I need to be more specific as that could be a lot of different episodes of the show. In this case, it ended with Nash powerbombing Hogan through the table, likely setting up a six man tag soon down the road. In addition to that, we have a lot of musical performances to plug because that’s what WCW is about anymore. Let’s get to it.
We of course open with a recap of the end of Nitro.
Opening sequence.
Prince Iaukea vs. Chris Adams
If Sid doesn’t break this up before it gets to three minutes, all hope is lost for this company. They actually slug it out to start with Adams taking over with a clothesline, sending Iaukea out to the floor for a breather. That’s kind of heelish of him. Not that I care due to Prince Iaukea being perhaps the least interesting wrestler of all time, but it’s definitely noticeable. Back in and Iaukea goes to the eyes to make sure we know he’s a heel. A legdrop gets two on Adams and Iaukea backdrops him down for good measure, only to have Sid come out to nail Adams for the DQ.
Adams takes a powerbomb and Nick Patrick is forced to count a three count. Iaukea takes one as well and Sid promises to lay out all our heroes. If he has to, he’ll take out the entire locker room to break Goldberg’s streak and become the Millennium Man. I’m sure this has nothing to do with Jericho’s millennium clock which was about to wrap up around this time. Also, isn’t Sid feuding with Sting at the moment?
Video on Sting vs. Sid. I need to be more patient.
CALL THE HOTLINE!
Video on Bagwell vs. the Cat.
Buff Bagwell vs. Scotty Riggs
Before the bell Buff grabs the mic and says the American Males are over, so it’s time for Scotty to start riding his own coattails. Had anyone actually thought of the American Males in the last two years to make that comment necessary? Bagwell picks up the mirror to really set Riggs off and the match starts in a hurry. Of course, Riggs may try to start fast but gets atomic dropped, punched and dropkicked out to the floor. The more I see of Bagwell in the ring, the more I’m unsure if he should have gotten that big push. Other than the Blockbuster, the guy just had NOTHING special in the ring.
Riggs bails to the floor just like Iaukea did earlier (must be a boring wrestler thing) but Buff sends him right back inside. Back in and they trade dropkicks with Bagwell hitting the second one, followed by a swinging neckbreaker. Ten right hands in the corner get the crowd into things a bit and send Riggs over to the corner for his mirror. Since referees are worthless in this company, Riggs blasts him in the throat with the mirror to take over.
Elbows and more dropkicking abound because Scotty Riggs really doesn’t know how to do much else. Oh wait apparently he can check the mirror some more. Riggs chokes on the ropes and slaps on a chinlock to kill some time. We get the usual escape before Buff avoids a dropkick. Gee I wonder how he knew it was coming. A double clothesline puts both guys down and Buff takes over, even though he had control just a few seconds earlier. Buff hammers away but eats a jawbreaker, allowing Riggs to put him on the top. Oh come on dude now you’re just asking for it. The Blockbuster connects for the easy pin.
Rating: D. Why in the world is Riggs still employed??? By this point it’s firmly established that there’s nothing interesting to him and giving him such a generic gimmick suggests that there’s nothing they can do with him. The match wasn’t even that bad from a technical standpoint but it was so boring with WAY too many dropkicks. What did WCW see in these two as a team? They’re both as lame as the other.
Video on Harlem Heat.
The announcers chat about Goldberg for a bit. He’s tough you see.
Video on the Triad vs. Harlem Heat.
Diamond Dallas Page was on the Late Late Show. As interesting as it sounds.
Kidman vs. Eddie Guerrero
This should help. Eddie, a face at the time, isn’t interested in shaking hands. Instead he backdrops Kidman to the apron but gets caught in a middle rope ankle scissors to take him down. That’s fine with Guerrero who goes after the knee to take over. Back to the apron and this time it’s a slingshot ankle scissors to send Eddie to the floor as we take a break. Back with Eddie holding Kidman in the Gory Special before switching over to the Gory Special 2000 (basically an Eye of the Storm but by the neck. I’ve never heard it called that before) for two.
A great looking hurricanrana gets the same on Kidman but Eddie makes the mistake of trying a powerbomb. The Shooting Star is countered and Eddie takes him down with a superplex. The fans are WAY into counting along with the referee. Back up and Kidman hammers away but charges into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Another powerbomb attempt goes badly for Eddie as Kidman hurricanranas him out to the floor.
Cue Vampiro to plant Eddie with the Nail in the Coffin behind the referee’s back. Kidman wakes up and, as Larry points out, can’t he take a wild guess at what happened? Apparently he can as he dives onto Vampiro instead of hitting the Shooting Star. Eddie and Vampiro beat Vampiro up as the match is thrown out.
Rating: C+. Of course this was good, but unfortunately it’s there to set up a story for the Insane Clown Posse because of some mainstream exposure that most wrestling fans didn’t care about. This is another match that could have done far better with more time and an actual ending, but that goes for almost all cruiserweight matches.
Rey Mysterio remembers that he’s a cruiserweight and comes out to help in the beatdown. Kidman powerbombs Vampiro down and Eddie nails the Frog Splash for good measure.
No Limit Soldiers vs. Lenny Lane/Lodi
Swoll and Brad Armstrong here with the former in his last match (other than one on Saturday Night) in WCW. Brad and Lenny, complete with pigtails here get things going with Lenny doing the talk to the hand thing. We stop again because it’s time for a brother hug. Brad finally grabs a hammerlock, probably being wondering how he managed to get here. Off to Lodi vs. Swoll, who shrugs off an armbar attempt. Lenny tries the same hold, only to have both Swoll clothesline both guys out to the floor. Granted he hit them in the chest but somehow that’s a major step in the right direction.
Thankfully it’s back to Brad who clotheslines Lodi to the floor, only to get tripped down so the, ahem, comedy team can take over. Lenny hammers Brad, Lodi hammers Brad, Swoll tries to make a save but backs down, hours of fun! Well at least it feels like hours. Lane nails Lodi (a commentary joke waiting to happen) and the hot tag brings in Swoll. Let’s get this over with. Swoll cleans house and everything breaks down, and the palm thrust is enough to end Lodi.
Rating: F+. Brad Armstrong, I feel so sorry for you. He had to get stuck in this horrible gimmick, basically babysitting Swoll because the guy can’t do something as simple as a clothesline without screwing it up. The guy needed a lot more training and a WAY better finisher before he might be ready for a low level show. He comes off like a big muscle guy who saw wrestling on TV and wanted to do it without knowing what it entailed. As usual, the power of nepotism means we have to suffer through his push, which thankfully is ending here. Lenny and Lodi are the same guys they’ve been for weeks and it keeps getting worse.
Nash vs. Hogan video.
This Week in WCW Motorspots.
Booker T. vs. Bam Bam Bigelow
This could be good if they let it last more than a few minutes. Bigelow shrugs him off to start and Booker needs a new strategy. He tries a dropkick instead (clearly inspired by Scotty Riggs) and knocks Bigelow to the floor. For some reason it takes Bigelow a good while to get back in and we take a break. Back with Booker fighting out of a chinlock and Bigelow running into a raised boot. The flying forearm has Bigelow reeling and the Ax Kick connects, only to have Page break up the Hangover for the DQ.
Rating: D+. Yeah they really didn’t care here and it showed badly. Matches like this one might be the most frustrating to sit through as it’s clear that the wrestlers just want to get out of there and get on with the angle stuff after the match. Harlem Heat vs. the Triad is good enough and might end the Triad’s title reign, but matches like these aren’t going to make me want to see the blowoff.
Booker eats a 3D post match as David Flair comes out with spray paint. They paint a diamond on Booker’s back until Stevie comes out, only to take a Diamond Cutter of his own. So wait, why is the Triad still associating with Flair? Ric has no power and David is worthlesss, so why would they want a liability like that in their corner? In theory it’s either overconfidence or money, but a quick promo would help a lot. Of course I don’t think WCW remembers that Ric is out of power yet so the promo might make things worse.
We see Hogan going through the table again.
Hogan vs. Nash video, the same one from about thirty minutes ago.
Video on Rodman vs. Savage.
Gene brings out Randy Savage for a chat. Okerlund asks where George is but Savage is uncharacteristically silent. He isn’t worried about all the people that are out to get him because Rodman and Nash are dust on his shoulders and Hogan is dust off……a rather personal place. Savage has a major announcement to make. Gene: “Save it for the Hotline!” That sounds like a line from a parody sketch. This coming Monday, Savage is going to reveal George’s bodyguard for Road Wild and it’s the same person that was driving the Hummer. I smell either a swerve or nothing happening and this never being mentioned again.
Diamond Dallas Page was on Hollywood Squares.
Diamond Dallas Page vs. Chris Benoit
Nitro rematch where Chris picked up the win. No Kanyon this week, as Page explains that he’s breaking in (not into in case you misread that) a million dollar home in Jersey. He calls the fans stupid, just like Benoit’s mama. There’s a good history between these two and they’re capable of having good matches but the feud is built off your mama jokes?
Benoit comes a-charging and knocks Page out to the floor, setting up a big plancha to wake the crowd up a bit. Back in and Benoit nails the snap suplex but has to go outside to fight Bigelow. The distraction works as Page nails Benoit from the apron and whips him into various steel objects. Why is it always steel? I know it sounds good but was there never any other metal available to make things from?
Back in and the helicopter bomb and Rock Bottom get two each and Page slaps on an abdominal stretch. Benoit finally hiptosses out and it’s time to roll some Germans with the third sending Page flying. Cue David again to slide Page the US Title. The Swan Dive hits the gold and Page covers the unconscious Benoit for the pin.
Rating: C. I’m not sure where they’re headed with this but they need to get the title onto either Page or Benoit in the very near future. The longer Flair holds it the weaker the other matches get because just like the TV Title on Steiner, the belt is basically being held hostage and there’s nothing for these guys to fight over. Yeah Benoit and Page can have good matches, but I need more to care about than some jokes I heard on the bus in sixth grade.
Video on Goldberg vs. Rick Steiner.
Goldberg vs. Rocco Rock
Well in theory at least as the graphic said Public Enemy. Rocco stalls on the floor to start, which is probably his best bet. He finally comes in and eats a shoulder block followed by the big press slam. Grunge comes in and gets the same sort of a beating. Back to Rock who hammers away in the corner but gets launched across the ring. A powerslam plants Rocco but Grunge slides in a chair. They take turns blasting Goldberg in the back with the chair before setting up a table in the corner. That’s fine with Goldberg (and the referee) as he spears both guys through the table, setting up the Jackhammer on Rock for the pin.
Rating: D. The match sucked but the idea made sense. This was Goldberg being himself and the fans continued to eat it up. I’m sure that’s the idea behind putting him with Steiner because….well you see…yeah there’s no logical reason to do that. The guy is over but they’re not going to put the TV Title on him, making the Road Wild match just a way to give Goldberg a win that really doesn’t mean much, which he gets almost weekly anyway. Also, was there a reason this wasn’t a handicap match?
Overall Rating: D+. As has been the case for weeks now, WCW is just trying to steady the ship while WWF is on a cruise around the world. Around this time, Raw may be at a very low level on the quality scale, but it’s through the roof on an entertainment scale. That being said, all Raw has to do at the moment is be more entertaining than Nitro and Thunder and it’s doing that by a landslide.
The other major issue for WCW at the moment is where do they go from here. There’s really nothing on the horizon for them unless they’re going to do Goldberg vs. Hogan again, which would be more interesting with Hogan in his old style. However, it’s really hard to promote that as your main event when WWF is riding Austin and Rock for all they’re worth and has so much talent waiting to break through to the next level. Until WCW starts moving forward, this war is going to be completely one sided.
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Monday Nitro #196 Date: July 12, 1999
Location: Jacksonville Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Attendance: 7,945
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan
We’re past Bash at the Beach and the woman beater is World Champion. In a match that totally ignored the whole “Sting can pin Nash” rule, Randy Savage pinned Nash with the help of Gorgeous George, who turned on Savage and Nash in the span of about ten minutes, to win the World Title. Bash at the Beach was one of the worst shows I’ve ever seen so things have to pick up here. Let’s get to it.
Video on Bret Hart’s speech last week and Goldberg returning. I wouldn’t show highlights from last night either.
Gene brings out the new champion to open the show. Savage actually comes out alone for once. He talks about how some people just can’t accept what’s right in front of them. Gene asks about Sid and the girls but Savage says he’s a self made man and had to do this himself. The fans want Goldberg as Savage issues an open challenge to anyone but Kevin Nash.
With the fans clearly making their choice clear, here’s Hollywood Hogan and you can see it coming from here. Hogan wants to take him up on the challenge but Savage says Hogan is in the same category as Nash. Somehow Hogan has already confirmed the match so Savage finally agrees.
Savage video.
Nitro Girls.
I Hate Rap video. Good grief we get it already.
Vampiro vs. Konnan
Konnan gets jumped during his catchphrases and Vampiro kicks him down with ease. Heenan actually gives us some backstory, explaining that these two hated each other down in Mexico. Granted he doesn’t say why but that’s more than you usually get. Vampiro stomps away as Tony keeps hyping up Hogan vs. Savage. Ok to be fair, that’s actually a big deal. Konnan avoids a top rope flip dive and hits the rolling lariat. A powerbomb gets two on Vampiro and a DDT gets the same. The X-Factor plants Vampiro and they head outside so Vampiro can pelt a chair at Vampiro for the DQ. Tony of course thinks it’s a double countout.
Rating: D+. I still don’t get the appeal of Vampiro but at this point pushing anyone new is a good thing. Konnan and his stupid catchphrases getting beaten up is always a good thing and the fact that his buddies weren’t with him was even better. Nothing match due to the time but it’s a sign that they’re trying someone new.
Vampiro plants him again with the Nail in the Coffin (Michinoku Driver) post match.
Stills of Flair vs. Malenko last night. Dean gets the better one later on.
Here’s Cat for some dancing and to insult Buff Bagwell. Are you kidding? Bagwell pins Flair, has to beat Piper in a boxing match because of whatever nonsense reason they couldn’t have a wrestling match, and now he gets ERNEST MILLER? Anyway, Cat makes fat jokes about Buff’s mom, drawing Bagwell out for a rather tame response. They fight, Bagwell beats him up, Miller kicks him with the red shoe and Sonny counts a pin, complete with a bell.
Nitro Girls.
Dean Malenko vs. Ric Flair
Bischoff comes out for commentary. So Ric was too injured to wrestle last night but can wrestle tonight? That’s rather convenient. Dean has Benoit and Saturn with him as Bischoff compares David Flair to Erik Watts. Ric orders Benoit and Saturn ejected and we’re ready to go with Dean erupting with right hands and clotheslines. Ric’s chop is no sold as Bischoff actually says Nash was ripped off last night. Malenko shoves Little Naitch away and whips Ric over the corner and out to the floor.
Ric backpedals just far enough for Anderson to run Dean over with a clothesline. Another volley of chops has no effect but Arn comes into the ring for a double team. Now the chops work as Ric hammers away in the corner. Robinson looks away so Flair can get two off a low blow. Dean fights back with right hands but Ric kicks him low again. A big vertical suplex gets two for Flair and an atomic drop stops Dean’s latest comeback attempt.
Malenko backslides Ric but Anderson distracts Robinson. Same thing happens off a small package so Dean clotheslines Flair into a Flop. A missile dropkick gets a delayed two and Dean clotheslines Arn for good measure. There’s a sleeper from Ric but Dean rams him into Robinson. Another referee comes in as Flair hooks the Figure Four. Malenko turns it over but Asya kicks the referee. Robinson gets up and gives it to Flair via submission, even though Dean’s music plays.
Rating: C. More angle than a match here as the disappointment in the old vs. new feu…..it’s not really a feud anymore so we’ll call it “the old guys beating up the new guys out of paranoia and short sighted thinking” continues. Flair is one of the few guys willing to put someone over but this nonsense continues. At least the action wasn’t bad.
Sting comes out to save Dean and says Flair has been holding people down for ten years, even though Space Mountain is on Viagra. Now Sting is going to take up the fight for WCW and wants a match with Flair for control of the company. Ric says Sting has to beat David to get the match he wants, which Sting is of course fine with. So to recap: everything in the last few weeks of Bagwell, Malenko, Benoit and Saturn have been used to set up Sting vs. Flair to continue a feud that has lasted twelve years. Such is life in WCW.
Stills from the junkyard match.
Steve Regal vs. Kidman
This could be really interesting if it had the chance to have a clean ending. Regal has Finlay and Taylor with him as the announcers list off a ton of injuries from the hardcore match last night. Regal cranks on the arm to start but has to roll away from a wristlock. A nice headscissors and dropkick set up a headlock on Regal as they stay on the mat for a bit. Kidman cranks on the headlock but has to kick out of some rollups.
Back up and Regal LAUNCHES Kidman over the top for a beating from his buddies. Regal suplexes him down and puts on a chinlock as we take a break. We come back with Regal putting on a surfboard before it’s off to a hard chinlock with a forearm over Kidman’s face. Kidman fights up and counters a powerbomb (which Regal uses SO often otherwise) before getting a few rollups for two each.
Some nice dropkicks have Regal in trouble but he launches Kidman into the referee by mistake. Cue the Europeans for the beatdown but Finlay accidentally hits Regal with a chair. Kidman cleans house and loads up the Shooting Star but hits the top rope by mistake. Bischoff gets in to check on him but Kidman is goldbricking and rolls Regal up for a fast pin with Bischoff counting the pin.
Rating: C+. I was digging this match until they had the screwy ending. Was this whole thing just about setting up Bischoff doing the right thing? If that’s the case….well ok I guess, even though I’m not sure why I’m supposed to be interested. The story keeps starting and stopping, even though it could be used for someone a bit more important.
Regal yells at Bischoff post match but nothing comes of it. Eric sits down and says Kidman was setting Regal up for the small package but a replay shuts him up. This was kind of odd all around.
Nitro Girls.
Sid Vicious vs. Kenny Kaos
Bischoff hypes up future appearances by the Insane Clown Posse, Dennis Rodman and KISS. You know, because Megadeth did so well. The match is exactly what you would expect: big strikes, no sold offense, a camel/cobra clutch, the chokeslam and powerbomb for the pin in less than two minutes.
Post match Sid wants Sting.
More Nitro Girls.
We see Sting and Flair’s talk from earlier.
Sting vs. David Flair
Non-title. The Stinger Splash hits in about four seconds and the Deathlock goes on but Robinson won’t even look at David. Sting doesn’t care and beats up everyone in sight with Ric’s shots having no effect whatsoever. Ric hides behind Asya in the corner but she takes a Splash of her own. No match for all intents and purposes.
Recap of Hogan and Savage.
Gene brings out Finlay for the presentation of the Hardcore Championship Trophy. Finlay puts over Northern Ireland and insults America until almost everyone from the junkyard match runs out for a big brawl and Jimmy Hart steals the trophy.
They screw up the stills package by showing the bad tag team match before showing the actually good one.
Booker T. vs. Diamond Dallas Page
After the Triad’s catchphrases, Page sends them to the back to make this a fair fight. That’s quite nice of him. Feeling out process to start with Booker nailing a dropkick before they head outside for a chase scene. Back in and Booker nails the flying forearm and a superkick to take over again. The big side kick misses though and Booker crotches himself on the ropes, allowing Page to grab a suplex as we take a break.
Back with Page hitting a quick clothesline followed by a sleeper, only to have Booker fight out with his usual stuff. The Diamond Cutter is blocked but the referee gets bumped, allowing the Triad to come back out for a beatdown. A Flatliner from Kanyon gets two so he tries powder, only to have it knocked back into his own face. Not that it matters as Bigelow comes in for the DQ.
Rating: C. Another match that was just ok and should have been better given who was in there. Booker REALLY needs something to do right now as he’s just been hanging around for months. That being said, I’d much rather have him here than in Bagwell’s spot where he has to get beaten up by James Brown meets Dorothy Gale.
Post match the Triad tapes Booker into the corner for a beating. We cut to the back to see the NWO making fun of Booker, causing Stevie Ray to grab a chair and run out for the save. As annoying as a Harlem Heat reunion would be, it’s better than nothing.
WCW World Title: Hollywood Hogan vs. Randy Savage
Savage is defending and Hogan comes out to the Wolfpack music. Savage rakes the eyes to start and man alive do these guys look old. Some lefts and rights in the corner have Hogan in trouble but he won’t be rammed into the buckle. The champ is sent to the floor so the girls come in, only to have Hogan ram Madusa and Miss Madness’ heads together. The girls get into it on the floor but get dragged away by security.
We keep going after a good bit of stalling with Hogan hammering away in the corner. There are the ten punches in the corner but Hogan ducks his head, allowing Savage to kick him in the face. Hogan of course pops up and takes it to the floor before this breaks down into a wrestling match. Savage goes into the barricade and steps before Hogan blasts him a few times with a chair.
Now it’s over to the announcers’ table as the brawling continues. Savage hides behind George and nails Hogan in the face to take over. They head back inside for a whipping and choke with the weightlifting belt. More slow punching and whipping follows before Savage slams him down to set up the elbow. Hogan isn’t interested in no selling and just rolls away before Hulking Up. Cue Sid to jump Hogan but that’s still not a DQ. George hands Savage a chain but Sting runs in to break up a powerbomb attempt. The chain knocks Hogan out but Nash breaks up the cover and Jackknifes Savage to give Hogan the title.
Rating: D. The match actually wasn’t the worst in the world but it was a lot of standing around waiting on something interesting to happen. These two know each other so well that they’re going to have something above a disaster, but that’s really not saying much. At the end of the day, Hogan may be the same thing we’ve seen a million times, but he’s more interesting than Nash or Savage.
Post match Hogan celebrates but Nash grabs the mic. He welcomes Hogan back and asks him for a title shot, presumably at Road Wild, since he’s handed Hogan the title twice now. Hogan says it’s on to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. This could have been much worse and is such a huge upgrade over last night. It’s still certainly not a good show or anything like that, but it’s enough to keep me from wanting to jump off a building like I did at Bash at the Beach. Hogan vs. Nash may not be the most interesting match, but it’s something new that doesn’t involve Randy Savage again.
However, there’s another major problem to deal with in WCW: following up on new developments. Look at stuff like Bagwell again. He’s feuding with the top heels and even pins one of them, then is losing to the curtain jerking nitwith Ernest Miller? Seriously? Or Goldberg, who returned last week and now is nowhere to be seen? Same goes with people like Torrie, who sided with Nash willingly, then ran back to David like nothing ever happened. And where did Luger go after returning for like a day?
So many stories start and are just dropped with no reasoning given, making it hard to get into anything new. This company needs a big chart or something with a reminder of who has something going on at the moment. They’re just starting and stopping stuff on a whim and it’s making it harder and harder to keep track of what’s going on around here. Granted I barely care after all the nonsense they’ve put me through but it’s still not easy.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the Royal Rumble at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Survivor Series Count-Up – 2006: When A Brand Split Goes Bad
Survivor Series 2006 Date: November 26, 2006
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,400
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler
After last year’s solid edition, the main event this year is Booker T vs. Batista. Think about that match for a minute and it just sounds like something that’s going to be dull. This is also a Last Chance match, meaning that if Batista doesn’t win the title here, he gets NO MORE CHANCES at Booker. If that’s not a sign as to what’s coming, you’re beyond my help. The other match that people remember here is Team DX vs. Team Rated-RKO. Let’s get to it.
This is the 20th show so we talk about tradition and all that jazz. Then it turns into a regular video about a PPV, but a good one.
Team Legends vs. Spirit Squad
Ric Flair, Sgt. Slaughter, Ron Simmons, Dusty Rhodes
Kenny, Johnny, Nicky, Mikey
Slaughter is replacing a cancer ridden Roddy Piper. Actually he got very lucky as he got a concussion because of a Conchairto from Edge, and on the tests the cancer was found. Arn Anderson is here with the Legends and we get the awesome Horsemen music. The only member of the Squad still around is Nicky, more famous as Dolph Ziggler. Mikey is Mike Mondo in ROH at the moment.
Simmons and Mikey start things off and guess who wins the slugout. Simmons beats up all of them but Mitch, the fifth member of the squad not in the match, interferes and gets Ron on the floor. Mitch’s distraction leads to Simmons getting counted out. Mitch gets ejected but Simmons beats him up first. Anderson gets ejected as well for no apparent reason. The Philly fans are TICKED. Nicky comes in to face Sarge and he mocks the salute. Fan: “PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE!”
Sarge beats him up with ease and it’s off to Dusty for some gyrating and elbows to the arm. It’s off to Flair and you know the Philly fans are all for that one. A chop later and it’s right back to Slaughter who hooks the Cobra Clutch, but Dusty and Kenny come in to fight, allowing Johnny to kick Sarge in the head to give Nicky a pin. Off to Dusty who hits the bionic elbow for the immediate elimination of Nicky, making it 3-2. Dusty gets caught in the corner but he gyrates it off.
The Flip Flop and Fly takes Kenny down but another elbow misses, giving Kenny a rollup (with jeans) pin. It’s Kenny/Johnny/Mikey vs. Flair now with Mikey starting first. Flair chops him into the corner but Mikey starts punching away. Ric hits a quick atomic drop and gets a rollup with feet on the ropes (now THAT is vintage Flair) for the elimination. Kenny gets in some shots but ducks his head and gets cradled for the pin, leaving Flair vs. Johnny. Less than a minute later it’s a Figure Four to give Flair the win.
Rating: C-. This was exactly what it was expected to be and that’s all it should have been. The legends were there to have a feel good nostalgia moment and get eliminated so Flair, the only one who had been active in the last three years or so, could knock out all of the Squad and give the fans a feel good moment. Also it’s only about ten minutes long so it’s not like this was anything major. It’s not a good technical match, but if that’s what you’re expecting here, you missed the point entirely. Besides, the Squad was gone literally the next night.
Post match the Squad beats down Flair and the Legends….are nowhere in sight. Kind of a downer.
We recap Benoit vs. Chavo. Benoit came back from an injury and won the US Title but Vickie and Chavo, his former friends, wanted nothing to do with him. Chavo and Vickie didn’t like Rey making his name off Eddie’s legacy, which is true but I don’t blame Rey for it. Chavo injured Rey’s knee (Mysterio needed time off for surgery) but when Benoit tried to make the save, the Guerreros weren’t happy. I’ve heard of worse reasons for a title match. There was some nonsense about Eddie’s estate that I don’t remember going anywhere. That would be one of those worse reasons.
US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero
Benoit, the champion, pounds away to start and hits a quick backbreaker for one. Some knees to the ribs set up a snap suplex for another two. Chavo comes back with a bunch of forearms and stomps in the corner, only to get caught in the Crossface. Vickie makes the save by putting Chavo’s boot on the face. JBL: “You don’t know what she shaves Chavo.” Chavo hits a pair of suplexes for two and it’s off to a chinlock.
Benoit comes out of it with a Samoan Drop of all things but gets dropkicked right back down for two. Another suplex is countered and Benoit rolls some Germans to set up the Swan Dive. Vickie grabs Benoit’s foot and the distraction makes the Swan Dive miss, sending his head crashing into the mat again. Chavo suplexes him down (again) but the Frog Splash only gets two. Benoit loads up the Sharpshooter but gets kicked off into Vickie who is on the apron. There’s the Crossface and Chavo taps out.
Rating: D+. That’s likely a bit low but this was a dull match. Chavo came off as more of an annoyance than a challenge here and that never makes for an entertaining match. I still shudder whenever I see Benoit take a head shot like he did off the Swan Dive as I always wonder which shot was the point of no return for him.
Watch the Extreme Elimination Chamber at December to Dismember! NEXT SUNDAY!!!
Lita says that she’s done after tonight’s match (that’s actually true) and she’s glad it’s in front of these horrible fans in Philadelphia. Edge makes some Donovan McNabb jokes and says his team is going to take out Team DX. After he leaves, Cryme Tyme leaves Lita’s locker room with a box of her stuff.
Women’s Title: Lita vs. Mickie James
Lita is defending. I miss Mickie with those skirts that keep flying up. Lita slaps Mickie in the face to start, causing Mickie to choke away in the corner. The champ comes back by literally throwing Mickie around which is a bit less than what you would expect from someone as talented as Lita. Mickie goes up and gets slammed off the top as this is one sided so far.
A quick snap suplex gets two for Lita as this continues to be slow. I can’t at all complain about the upskirt shots of Mickie though. Off to a sleeper by Lita which is the last thing this match needed. Mickie gets in the ropes and avoids a charge in the corner. She goes up and is immediately suplexed down for two. Now the fans think Lita has herpes.
Mickie hits a SWEET spinning kick to take Lita’s head off followed by a fisherman’s suplex for two (and a GREAT crotch shot of Mickie). Moonsault gets two for Lita but the Edgecution is countered, giving Mickie two. They trade rollups and Mickie hits the jumping DDT to retire Lita and win the title.
Rating: D. Most of that is for getting great views of Mickie and Lita’s rocking cleavage. Other than that, this was some pretty uninspired stuff. Lita left when she should have as she had nothing left to accomplish and no one like Trish to work with. Pretty terrible match here but it passed the torch to Mickie who was indeed the future of the division.
Lita asks for a microphone and makes Lillian tell the crowd to cheer for her. She doesn’t like being booed and is glad to get to leave in front of Philly because its fans suck. Here’s Cryme Tyme with a box of Lita’s stuff they stole earlier. They’re having a HO Sale and it’s cash only. The first item sold: Lita’s yeast infection medicine for one dollar.
Cryme Tyme realizes JBL is at the announce table and offer the goods to him. He says he’s the only person in America who doesn’t have some of Lita’s panties so he gives them $100. The next item: Lita’s vibrator. Dang she’s bored in the locker room. That goes for 25 bucks and there’s only one thing left. It’s cheap, it’s wide, you can put your head in it: it’s Lita’s box. That goes for I think 20 bucks to end a hilarious segment.
Batista has nothing to say about the title match tonight. Booker attacked Batista at the contract signing and hit him in the throat with a scepter. After seeing a clip of it, Batista says he’s leaving tonight with the title.
Team DX vs. Team Rated-RKO
Shawn Michaels, HHH, Hardy Boys, CM Punk
Edge, Randy Orton, Johnny Nitro, Mike Knox, Gregory Helms
This is Punk’s first major match and Jeff is IC Champion. DX plays to the crowd for a LONG time before the heel entrances. The fans of course LOVE Punk, so he gets to ask if the fans are ready. I believe Helms, the current Cruiserweight Champion, is feuding with Matt Hardy at this point. Knox has some chick named Kelly Kelly with him and at the moment, she’s an exhibitionist. Rated-RKO are the Raw Champions too so most of the gold in the company is in this match.
HHH asks Kelly to flash him and has Shawn cover his eyes. Knox comes in to stop it, Shawn kicks him in the face to eliminate him. Shawn to HHH: “Who was that guy?” Points for a funny bit if nothing else. Nitro comes in to speed things up but Shawn slides to the floor and puts his arm around Melina. We’ve got a comedy match here. Off to Jeff who works on the arm of Nitro. Apparently these two have been feuding a bit too lately.
Off to Matt so the Hardys can hit some nice double team stuff. Nitro finally gets in a shot to the face and it’s off to Helms. Matt is slammed off the top and it’s off to Edge to stomp on Matt. Well that’s appropriate. Back to Helms for a suplex and it’s immediately off to Orton. After some very basic stuff, here’s Nitro again so Melina can SCREECH. Matt hooks the Side Effect and there’s the tag to Punk. Punk immediately starts his strikes and hits the knee/bulldog in the corner.
Nitro blocks the Rock Bottom but the second attempt (with an assist from Matt) sets up the Vice for the tap out. Edge comes in to face Punk and you can feel the internet’s orgasm coming (pun intended). Punk pounds on him in the corner but Orton guillotines Punk on the top rope to give the heels their first advantage. Randy comes in and hits a dropkick for two before it’s back to Helms. After some knees to the face, Helms hits a one knee Codebreaker to put Punk down.
Back to Orton for a slugout with Punk, resulting in the RKO taking Punk down. Why Randy can’t cover immediately isn’t quite clear but Shawn makes the save anyway. Edge gets the tag but spears the buckle. JR: “That middle turnbuckle isn’t in the match!” Hot tag brings in HHH to face Helms and the beating is on fast. A facebuster puts Helms down but the Edge-O-Matic breaks up the Pedigree. Everything breaks down and Jeff and Shawn dive on Rated-RKO.
Matt comes in with the Twist on Helms followed by a Swanton to make it 5-2. The heels take their belts and walk but the Hardys will have none of that. Team DX take turns beating up both members and it’s Sweet Chin Music to eliminate Edge. So it’s Orton vs. five guys now and Randy tries to run, but the Hardys and Punk stop him. Back in and it’s Chin Music and the Pedigree to complete the sweep.
Rating: C-. This was entertaining but when you consider the captains were in a pretty big feud, this is kind of a questionable ending. The guy that gets the big rub here is Punk, as he goes from a guy on the C show to rubbing elbows with two of the biggest stars ever and one of the best tag teams ever. Fun match here but it didn’t really accomplish much.
We recap Kennedy vs. Undertaker. Basically Kennedy wants to break the legend of Taker, or about the same thing as about half the feuds Taker has had in years. It’s a first blood tonight because Kennedy busted Taker open on Smackdown recently. Kennedy got a blood bath from Taker’s magic powers.
Kennedy isn’t worried but MVP comes up and notices the vasoline on Kennedy’s forehead. Apparently these two are friends.
Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker
I keep typing Anderson instead of Kennedy. Kennedy immediately drops to the floor to try to get an early advantage, but as soon as they get back in Taker punches him down. We head back to the floor and Kennedy gets punched over the announce table with Taker in total control. We head to the crowd and Taker hits a pair of headbutts. Back to ringside and Kennedy gets in his first big move by sending Taker into the steps.
Kennedy tries to dive off the apron but gets caught and rammed into the post. This has been almost all Taker so far. We head back in and Taker busts out a freaking superplex to put Kennedy down. The offense looks good but don’t you need to go for the head? I don’t know if internal bleeding counts but it’s the best I can come up with. Kennedy hits Taker low but Taker immediately comes back with a kick to the face.
A buckle was taken off somewhere in there by Kennedy but Taker sends him into it twice in a row. Kennedy kicks Taker low again and Kennedy is bleeding from the mouth. He rolls to the floor before the referee can see it and here’s MVP with a towel to clean up the blood. They start to walk away, but MVP throws Kennedy back in the ring which is payback for Kennedy doing the same thing to MVP on Smackdown.
Taker pounds away in the corner but Kennedy drops him face first on the exposed buckle. Kennedy starts pounding away but MVP brings in a chair to hit….someone, but it winds up hitting Taker and busts him open to give Kennedy the upset win. The fans boo that out of the building because Taker is such a legend at this point.
Rating: C. This was a decent brawl but the ending, which was to advance Taker/Kane vs. MVP/Kennedy, kind of sucks. The feud just never worked because at the end of the day, it’s two guys who are career midcarders at this point against two former world champions who can beat up anyone. Kennedy never got to the point where they wanted him to be due to various reasons, but this is the fifth former world champion he had beaten.
Kennedy beats up Taker post match but Taker snaps up and pounds him down as well. Taker WHACKS him with the chair to get a gasp from the crowd. JBL LOSES IT as Kennedy gets beaten up even more and tombstoned.
Buy Piper’s DVD! No really, that one is worth checking out. Stay FAR away from his book though. It’s HORRIBLE.
Sharmell tells Booker to be excited because tonight is Batista’s last chance.
Team Cena vs. Team Big Show
John Cena, Kane, Bobby Lashley, Sabu, Rob Van Dam
Big Show, Test, MVP, Finlay, Umaga
Let’s see. It’s Philadelphia and we’ve got Sabu and RVD on one team. Who do you think the fans are going to be cheering for? Cena is Raw World Champion and Big Show is ECW Champion. Umaga is still undefeated and a monster. Naturally Cena is booed out of the building. Cena and Umaga start things off with Cena knocking Umaga to the floor. Everything breaks down and Umaga gets a monitor to knock out RVD for a DQ. Umaga also destroys the rest of Team Cena because that’s what savages do.
We finally get down to Finlay vs. RVD but it’s quickly off to Test for some bland big man power stuff. Back to Irish dude for some stomping and then to really mix things up, MVP comes in and stomps as well. Van Dam is bleeding from the mouth as MVP puts on a chinlock. Rob comes back with a cradle for two and a spin kick to take MVP down. Van Dam kicks all of the heels including a LOUD one to Finlay. Test tries to ram RVD into the post but since he’s big and dumb, Test’s head goes into it instead. Kane chokeslams MVP and the Five Star gets the pin for Rob.
While Van Dam is getting up, Test immediately comes in and kicks his head off to make it 4-3. Test gets sent to the floor and Lashley spears him down, followed by a tornado DDT from Sabu back inside for the pin. Show immediately chokeslams Sabu to make it 3-2 and it’s time for the giants to fight. Oh joy indeed. They both grabs chokeslam grips but here’s Hornswoggle (the Little Bastard at the moment) for a distraction. Finlay clocks Kane with that club that I can’t spell so Show can pin Kane after a chokeslam. Starting with MVP’s pin, those five eliminations all came within less than two minutes. I didn’t skip anything in there.
To recap, it’s Show/Finlay vs. Cena/Lashley. Cena comes in to face the monster but is immediately taken down. Off to Finlay for a clothesline and some good old fashioned cheating. Show sends Cena flying off a headbutt and it’s back to the heel corner. After more of a beating, Cena fights them both off and makes the hot tag to Lashley. Powerslam is escaped but a spear puts Finlay down for two.
A double clothesline from Show puts Cena and Lashley down and here’s Horny again. Cena loads him up in the FU and in the distraction, Lashley spears Finlay down to make it 2-1. Both good guys take their turns on Show including stuff like double DDTs and double suplexes. JR calls Cena cock strong and I don’t want to know what that one means. Lashley breaks up the chokeslam with a spear and the FU gets the final pin.
Rating: D. As I was writing that, it felt like I was just saying what was happening and nothing special was going on. The reason it felt like nothing was going on was because nothing was going on. This match was as paint by numbers as you could ever ask for and that makes for a VERY dull match. Cena hitting the FU on Show is always worth seeing, but this didn’t work at all.
JR says that Lashley is debuting at Survivor Series tonight which is flat out wrong. To be a bit fair though, JR wasn’t on commentary for that match last year.
The Extreme Elimination Chamber is coming.
We recap Booker T vs. Batista. Booker won the King of the Ring and became a king with a bad British accent before winning the title off Rey Mysterio. He kept cheating to beat Batista and tonight is Big Dave’s last shot at the title unless he wins. Batista never lost the title in the first place and had to drop it due to injury, so tonight is his last chance to regain what he thinks is still his.
Before the match, Teddy comes out and says that if Booker gets counted out or DQ’ed, he loses the title.
Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Booker T
Booker is defending in case you’re really stupid. Batista jumps him in the aisle and the referee says you have to get it in the ring. Why? Batista can win the title via countout, so no he doesn’t need to get it in the ring. Booker fires off some chops in the corner and is immediately punched in the face for his efforts. A suplex puts Booker down but he escapes an early Batista Bomb attempt.
After Booker gets back in, Batista hits a clothesline for two. This isn’t really working so far. Booker finally comes back with a hot shot to take over before slingshotting Batista’s throat into the bottom rope. Batista comes back with some right hands but Booker pokes him in the eye. We’re about five minutes into this and it’s not clicking at all. Big Dave comes out of nowhere with a side slam for two followed by a Jackhammer. Why has no one made that a finisher since Goldberg? It’s a good power move but no one uses it really. That’s very odd.
A Boss Man Slam gets two for Batista and they head to the apron to slug it out. Cole brings up a good question: what happens if there’s a double countout or double DQ? Presumably it would be a draw and Booker keeps the title? Right? A Sharmell distraction lets Booker take over as JBL goes on a tirade about Teddy Long being racist. Side kick puts Batista down for two. We hit a chinlock to fill in some time which is probably the last thing they should do right now. Batista comes back with some right hands and a belly to belly suplex for two.
Batista cranks things up and knocks Booker to the floor before sending him into the steps. Back in and a top rope shoulder gets two. The spinebuster gets the same but Booker grabs the Bookend for two. Batista comes back with the Batista Bomb but the champ grabs the rope. Sharmell gives Booker the title, Batista takes it from him and clocks Booker with it, new champion. Yep that’s really how this ends. Not with a Batista Bomb, but with Batista cheating.
Rating: D-. A horrible match to end a horrible show is always appropriate. Batista getting the title back was probably the right move as he was insanely over and hadn’t been champion since January. This match didn’t work at all though and it was the last time Booker would be near the world title, which is probably a good thing if he’s as bad as he looked here.
Overall Rating: D-. When the second best match of your show is a group of guys in their late fifties or early sixties beating up male cheerleaders for ten minutes, your show is in trouble. There’s NOTHING worth seeing here at all and this show sucked. The other odd thing here is where the time went.
This show runs about two hours and forty minutes and the longest match (main event) doesn’t break fourteen minutes. There’s no big segment on it either so I have no idea where the time went. Other than the main event nothing is awful but there’s nothing worth watching. Either way, this is an awful show and probably the worst since the 90s.
Survivor Series 2005 Date: November 27, 2005
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 15,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole, Tazz
The main change here is that we’ve seen the rise of Batista and Cena, with the latter defending against Angle and a crooked referee tonight. On top of that we’ve got Raw vs. Smackdown in a major Survivor Series match which actually feels kind of big for once. Other than that there’s HHH vs. Flair in a Last Man Standing match which should be good. Let’s get to it.
The announcers talk about the main event and bragging rights to start things off.
Booker T vs. Chris Benoit
This is the first match in a best of seven series for the US Title, which would go on until January and saw Randy Orton wrestling four of the matches in Booker’s place. Benoit gets in Booker’s face in the corner and they tie up for a bit. Booker hits an awkward kind of slam but Benoit pops right back up. Benoit sends him to the floor and that goes absolutely nowhere. Back in and Chris takes him to the mat with a leg hold.
After Booker grabs a rope, it’s time for a test of strength with Booker (the heel here) kicking Benoit in the face to take over. When all else fails, kick the guy in the face. A suplex puts Booker down as does an elbow to the face. Booker hits a side slam for two and it’s off to an arm hold followed by an abdominal stretch. After Benoit escapes, Booker kicks his head off for two. This is moving somewhat slowly so far but it’s not bad.
Booker hits an arm trap neckbreker (like Sandow’s Terminus) for two and it’s off to a reverse chinlock. Benoit escapes a vertical suplex and it’s time to roll some Germans, but Booker escapes the third and kicks Benoit in the face again. Another attempt at a kick is caught in a legdrag but the Sharpshooter that follows it up doesn’t quite work, giving Booker a cradle for two.
A snap suplex gets two for Chris and we roll some more Germans. Benoit loads up the Swan Dive but Sharmell’s distraction lets Booker load up a superplex. Benoit goes psycho though and headbutts Booker to the mat, but the Swan Dive misses, allowing Booker to get a rollup with Sharmell holding Booker’s feet on the ropes for the pin.
Rating: B-. These two are awesome together and both series they had (they did this in WCW for the TV Title) were entertaining stuff. At the end of the day, sometimes there’s nothing wrong with throwing two people out there and letting them have a good match. This was a solid choice for an opener too as both guys got to show off and the fans were getting into it near the end.
Vince wishes Bischoff luck tonight and Montreal is referenced. Of course. Eric says he’ll screw Cena. Cena pops up and says “so Eric Bischoff screws guys. Good luck with that.” Vince then says to Cena, and I 100% quote, “keep it up my nigga.” Booker and Sharmell don’t seem pleased.
Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Melina
Trish is defending and Melina has MNM, the Smackdown tag champions, with him. This is interpromotional apparently. Melina and MNM had kidnapped Trish and held her captive until the match was agreed to. Well that’s one way to do it. Trish and her psycho fan (the brand new Mickie James) come out fast with Trish sending Melina to the floor and diving on all three members of MNM. Trish is looking great here.
Melina gets thrown around by her hair, sending those furry boots flying. Trish headscissors her down and I think they botch a headscissors out of the corner with Trish kicking Melina in the face instead of getting the ankles around her head. Melina uses her basic abilities (meaning stretching to freakish angles to choke and kick a lot) before going to the floor for a cat fight with Mickie.
As the brawl is going on, MNM tries the Snapshot (elevated double team DDT) on Trish, only to get caught and ejected. Things calm down a bit and Melina puts on a surfboard, which may or may not be an excuse to have Trish’s chest shoved out while wearing tight leather. Trish fights back but Stratusfaction is countered into a face plant for two, drawing the primal screams from Melina.
Stratus comes back with some forearms but runs into a boot in the corner. The Stratusphere puts Melina down and there’s a spinebuster of all things for two for Trish. Chick Kick and Stratusfaction miss and Trish is sent to the apron, but Mickie pulls her out of the way of a charging Melina. Trish goes up and misses about 95% of a top rope bulldog but it’s good enough for the pin.
Rating: C-. This was much better than I was expecting given what level Melina was at here. Trish looked fine (and her wrestling was even good too) but she needed more to work with here. This would lead up to Mickie going totally psycho and evil, setting up an excellent match (other than the ending) at Mania between the two of them.
Watch Jake’s DVD! It’s full of lies but watch it!
Dmitri Young, a baseball payer, is here.
We recap HHH vs. Flair. HHH came back from injury and turned on Flair in their first match together. They fought in a cage match at Taboo Tuesday with Flair somehow pulling out one of the biggest upsets of his career. Tonight it’s a rematch in a last man standing match.
Ric Flair vs. HHH
Last man standing. Oh and Flair is IC Champion but this is non-title. Like HHH would ever actively go after a midcard title. HHH jumps Flair as he comes to the ring and beats on him in the aisle for a bit before we head inside. It’s chair time very quickly but Flair pokes HHH in the ribs with a kendo stick to block the shot. They head into the crowd with Flair chopping HHH through the fans. He swings one time too many though and HHH backdrops him back to ringside.
A suplex puts Flair’s back on the concrete and draws some loud swearing. HHH suplexes him back into the ring and Flair is in trouble. Some quick punches don’t do much good for Flair and we head back to the outside. Flair gets posted, but if that’s not enough to cut him open, HHH carves up his forehead with a freaking SCREWDRIVER. There is blood everywhere in just a matter of seconds, so HHH digs it in even more back in the ring.
HHH takes him down and the knee drop misses by about eight inches. The shot of the second one is even worse and they slug it out in the corner. We head outside again and Flair sends him into the steps to give Flair a breather. Flair pokes HHH in the eye but HHH hits a spinebuster to take him right back down on the concrete. HHH talks trash on the mic and Flair is like “boy Jack Brisco’s tights were tougher than you” and he grabs HHH by the balls. Well when there’s nothing else I guess that’s all you can do. HHH blasts him with the mic to break the grip. I guess that’s Stephanie only territory.
Flair is set for a Pedigree through the announce table but he backdrops HHH through the other table, drawing our first count of the match. That gets a nine and HHH grabs another chair. Back in and HHH has Flair dead to rights but instead of swinging the chair, HHH pounds away with punches instead. HHH pounds away in the corner, so Flair kicks him low again, followed by a chair shot for five. Flair is like YUM and bites at the cut on HHH’s forehead. Flair is kind of a weird dude sometimes.
Ric wraps HHH’s balls around the post and does the same to the leg, which is a smart move in a last man standing match. Then he crushes the balls FOUR MORE TIMES. DUDE FOR THE LOVE OF STEPHANIE GIVE IT A BREAK! Back in and Flair chop blocks HHH, before biting the guy’s thigh. Flair is a pretty sick guy at times no? He goes back to the knee (with kicks this time instead of teeth) but the Figure Four is blocked twice, the second time having Flair knocked to the outside.
For the first time, Flair pulls out a weapon of his own and whacks the knee with a chair. Now the Figure Four goes on and Flair is perfectly allowed to grab the ropes. HHH taps but it doesn’t mean anything here. That draws an 8 with a shaky call from the referee that HHH was up at one point. A double clothesline puts both guys down and HHH rolls to the floor. The Game throws in some steps and clocks Flair in the face with them. Flair needs to scream less. Sometimes you should just be stunned and dazed you know?
HHH charges with the steps again but Flair hits a drop toehold to send HHH into the steps face first. That only gets a nine so they slug it out. Flair sends him into the ropes but ducks his head like an idiot, allowing HHH to hit the Pedigree……which only gets eight. HHH Pedigrees him AGAIN, but Flair is up at 8 and flips off HHH. A THIRD Pedigree gets nine, so HHH “hits” (Get better directors already. This is ridiculous) him in the back with the sledgehammer to finally keep Flair down for ten.
Rating: B+. Bad direction and cuts aside, this was a very solid brawl. They beat the tar out of each other with Flair trying as hard as he could to have one last great moment, but not being evil enough anymore to hang with the new guy in HHH. This was good stuff and thankfully it more or less ended HHH and Flair’s time on camera together.
Flair is taken out on a stretcher.
Buy the Bret Hart DVD! No really, this one is awesome.
Trish and Mickie do an online interview.
Orton gives Team Smackdown a pep talk but talks about Batista as the weak link. Batista shows up and the tune changes. He thinks that since he’s world champion, he should be leader. JBL says it should be him. Batista glares at him and JBL stammers a lot.
Here are Edge and Lita with something to say. Edge is Mr. MITB at this point but doesn’t have a match tonight. Edge talks about how his own talk show, called The Cutting Edge, is debuting soon. Now that we’ve got that covered, let’s talk to Dmitri Young. Edge makes fun of the Tigers for not being able to win the World Series and calls everyone here fat. He makes fun of the Detroit sports teams and now they give Dmitri Young (“Come here Mark Henry. Oh wait…”) a live mic. Young talks about Edge’s balls and lists off all of Detroit’s titles before saying Edge has none. This took seven minutes somehow.
We recap Angle vs. Cena. Basically it’s “I’m Kurt Angle and therefore better than you. NOW LET ME SHOUT EXACTLY WHAT I JUST SAID AGAIN!” Cena is like bring it man and whatever rhymes with man!
Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Kurt Angle
Daivari, Angle’s crony, is the guest referee. The YOU SUCKS from the crowd are censored because of some Bischoff ruling. Daivari is rubbing Angle’s shoulders during the intros. Oh and Cena is defending. The champ is here….right on the mat with Angle working on the leg. Cena comes back with an armdrag into an armbar and some shoulder blocks to send Kurt to the floor. Daivari won’t let Cena go after Angle and Joey is way more excited about it than anyone else. Isn’t Daivari doing what a referee is supposed to do anyway?
Back in and Cena hits some elbows and a release fisherman’s suplex for no count from Daivari. Cena goes to yell at him and is immediately caught in the ankle lock. Cena finally gets to the rope but Daivari kicks his hand off. The hold is broken and Cena spinebusts Angle before slapping Daivari a few times. Angle won’t let Daivari DQ Cena, so Cena knocks them both to the floor.
Kurt gets all fired up and slams Cena into the steps and hits an overhead belly to belly on the outside. A second referee comes out as Daivari is still down. Daivari would be a wrestler one day, so how did he get so much better at being able to take punishment? I’ve never gotten that. Anyway, Cena puts on a reverse waistlock but Cena comes back with a cross body for two. Angle comes back with a knee lift and Cena is in trouble.
The fans are ALL OVER Cena all of a sudden, with a huge Cena Sucks chant. Off to a chinlock with Angle holding the leg back as well. Cena finally comes back with a jawbreaker and a DDT to put both guys down. They slug it out with Cena taking over via some clotheslines. Cena initiates his finishing sequence and is set for the FU, but Angle clotheslines the replacement referee.
A low blow puts Cena down and Angle calls in another referee to count two on the Angle Slam. Angle superplexes Cena down for two but the moonsault misses. Cena loads up another FU but Angle grabs the referee to escape. An uppercut puts the referee down AGAIN and Kurt throws Daivari back in, who is apparently STILL out cold after about ten minutes, breaking Davey Boy Smith’s record from 1994. A Smackdown referee comes down but Angle yells at him, allowing Cena to DDT Daivari. Kurt comes in and walks into the FU for the pin.
Rating: C. This was WAY overbooked and Cena was in over his head with Angle, but it wasn’t bad or anything. Angle vs. Cena was supposed to be a huge feud but it never felt like anything all that special. Cena wasn’t ready for a real showdown with Angle yet but he would get a lot better over the next year or so though. The referee stuff was kind of stupid though, especially with Daivari being out cold for so long.
Eric Bischoff vs. Teddy Long
Yes this is real, yes it’s happening on PPV, yes we’re supposed to ignore Bischoff being a martial arts expert from WCW and thing Teddy might have a chance in a straight fight, and yes this is going to SUCK. Teddy has some network consultant with him named Palmer Cannon who never lasted long. They’re both GM’s if that wasn’t clear. Teddy poses a lot on the corner and we haven’t had any contact after a minute. Teddy dances a bit and Eric misses a kick. There’s more dancing and no contact still.
We do the exact same thing AGAIN before Eric chokes Teddy with his sash. There are two referees in there for no apparent reason. Eric chokes away but Teddy takes off his shoe and whacks Eric in the head. Bischoff goes to the throat to stop Teddy again…..and here’s the Boogeyman. If you’ve never seen him, picture Darth Maul from the first Star Wars prequel if he ate worms. He sneaks up on Eric and lays him out with a pumphandle slam, giving Teddy the pin.
Rating: S. Six minutes. This match took SIX MINUTES. The WWE owes me six minutes of my life back. John Cena vs. Kurt Angle for the WWE Championship can only get thirteen minutes but this gets SIX? Who in the world thought this was a good idea? At least it went by….no actually it didn’t go by fast. This won worst match of the year and I can’t argue at all.
Team Smackdown is coming to the ring and the Smackdown D-list guys cheer them on.
The Raw guys do the same thing.
We recap Raw vs. Smackdown. At a 3 hour special Raw called WWE Homecoming, there was going to be a Smackdown six man tag but Bischoff turned the lights out on them because he said they were inferior to Raw. This prompted a multiple PPV running feud where they kept invading each others’ shows, setting up a battle for supremacy here.
Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown
Shawn Michaels, Carlito, Chris Masters, Kane, Big Show,
Batista, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio, Bobby Lashley, John Bradshaw Layfield
Show and Kane are tag champions, Batista is world champion but is injured due to Big Show and Kane attacking him over and over, and Lashley is undefeated at this point. This hasn’t been mentioned yet on the commentary for pretty obvious reasons, but Orton is replacing Eddie Guerrero who died about ten days before this. Shawn vs. Randy gets things going and it’s a very slow opening with both guys feeling the other out.
Orton gets thing going by slapping Shawn so Shawn literally slaps Orton down to the mat. Three times in about 30 seconds, Shawn takes Orton to the mat with a headlock, Orton grabs a headscissors to counter, and Shawn escapes. Randy charges into a boot in the corner but slams Shawn down to take over again. The match is starting slow but the bickering from the commentators is funny stuff, as they’re taking this rivalry personally.
Off to Masters who gets his eyes raked by Orton but the power game of Masters takes over. Lashley comes in to a reaction from the fans and they do the two power guys collide with each other. Bobby takes over with a slam but Masters clotheslines him down. Masters tries the Masterlock but Bobby easily blocks it. Carlito is pulled in and thrown around as well, culminating with a powerslam for two.
Off to Shawn to see what he can do with this monster, but Lashley slams him off the top. A suplex puts Shawn down so Carlito comes in sans tag and takes the Dominator. Shawn is about to take one as well, but Kane breaks it up and chokeslams Lashley to give Shawn the pin. Rey comes in next and Kane hits him in the back as well to give Shawn another advantage. Masters drops some elbows on Rey to keep him on the mat which is the right move.
A gorilla press drop puts Rey down again and here’s Kane who misses an elbow. Mysterio starts speeding things up and gets two off a standing moonsault. Kane comes up with a very easy counter by kicking a charging Rey in the face. Off to a bearhug as this is the longest segment of the match so far. Rey fights out of it and slides between Kane’s legs to make the tag to Batista.
Big Dave gets in some shots but the bandages all over his arm and chest are a target for Kane. Kane gets in a shot and everything breaks down, allowing Batista to hit a spinebuster on Kane for the elimination. Big Show chokeslams Batista for a very close two but Kane and Big Show double chokeslam Batista to put him out. JBL immediately tries the Clothesline on Show but gets grabbed by the throat. JBL kicks Show low, but gets caught jumping off the middle rope. That’s freaking SCARY power by Show. Show superkicks Orton down and LAUNCHES Rey into the corner.
Orton guillotines Show into the Clothesline from JBL who tags….Mysterio? The 619 sets up the RKO which sets up another Clothesline which sets up a seated senton from Rey for the elimination. Cool sequence here as the team all went after Show to get rid of him. Show would DESTROY Rey on a special Smackdown to get revenge. Shawn goes after JBL on the floor and gets thrown away in a fallaway slam.
To recap, it’s Mysterio, JBL and Orton vs. Shawn, Carlito and Masters. It’s Masters vs. Rey now with Masters getting two after sending Mysterio into the corner. Off to Carlito for a legdrop and chinlock for a few moments. Mysterio fights up and makes a blind tag to JBL who ENDS Carlito with a Clothesline to make it 3-2. Masters and JBL slug it out a bit but Rey tags himself in. JBL kicks Chris in the face to give his teammate an advantage, setting up a 619 and the springboard legdrop to take out Masters.
So it’s Shawn vs. Rey/Orton/JBL and Shawn is STILL down on the floor from the fallaway slam. Mysterio starts with Shawn and things go faster. Rey hits the 619 to send Shawn across the ring, but the West Coast Pop jumps right into the superkick ala Shelton Benjamin for the elimination. JBL comes in and tries the Clothesline but gets superkicked down AGAIN to make it Orton vs. Shawn. There were about fifteen seconds between the two pins.
The RKO and superkick both miss so Shawn dives on Orton on the floor to take him out. The fans want Taker who was promised to be here tonight. There are the forearm and superkick followed by some clotheslines. The top rope elbow hits Randy but Shawn can’t cover. JBL is still at ringside for some reason and he grabs a chair. Shawn loads up the superkick again but JBL shoves down the outside referee and misses a chair shot. The distraction lets Orton hit the RKO for the final pin.
Rating: B. This was a direct copy of Team Austin vs. Team Bischoff from two years ago, even down to the final participants, but the results were a bit inverted. Here, the part before the solo Shawn part was better but Shawn’s solo part wasn’t as good. Also, Batista running in was better than JBL’s chair stuff here. It’s still probably a better match overall, mainly due to the better opening part.
The low level Smackdown guys come out to put Orton on their shoulders…..and there’s a gong. We’ve got lights, we’ve got chanting, we’ve got druids carrying a casket, and a Dead Man coming out of said casket. Taker walks into the ring and beats up some jobbers as the roster bails. Orton is scared to death to end the show. Hell in a Cell for these two next month.
Overall Rating: B. This show is pretty much never talked about other than occasionally the main event and that’s a shame. This is an entertaining and solid show all around with the only bad match being a battle of the GM’s, and even that only runs six minutes. You have a bloodbath in HHH vs. Flair, a fun main event with entertaining commentary and some solid wrestling all around. Nothing is great, but if you’ve got two hours and forty five minutes to spare, check this out as it’s quality stuff.
Ratings Comparison
Booker T vs. Chris Benoit
Original: B
Redo: B-
Trish Stratus vs. Melina
Original: B
Redo: C-
HHH vs. Ric Flair
Original: B-
Redo: B+
John Cena vs. Kurt Angle
Original: B+
Redo: C
Theodore Long vs. Eric Bischoff
Original: O (For Oh I can’t think about this anymore)
Redo: S (For Six Minutes)
Team Smackdown vs. Team Raw
Original: B
Redo: B
Overall Rating
Original: B
Redo: B
I’m surprised by how much more I liked the girls and Cena vs. Angle. They’re good but they’re not that good. Still a solid show though.
Survivor Series 2001 Date: November 18, 2001
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 10,142
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman
I’ve talked about the Invasion over and over and over as have a bunch of other people so I’ll spare you the big explanation of it. In short, WWF bought WCW and ECW (or close enough to that at least) and over the summer and fall of 2001, squandered what could arguably have been a billion dollars’ worth of stories, feuds and shocks. But hey, why make a fortune when you can destroy WCW and have a final blowoff in the home of Starrcade where you can say HAHA I BEAT YOU TURNER and crush WCW once and for all? That’s the whole show for the most part. It’s one Survivor Series match, winner take all. Let’s get to it.
The opening video is a cool idea as it shows all of the old logos for the WWF over the years and a bunch of great moments in company history, set to a song called The End Is Here. Tonight it’s winner take all in the main event.
European Title: Christian vs. Al Snow
Christian is in the Alliance and defending. He greets his fans in South Carolina and says he’s awesome. Snow comes out to the Tough Enough theme which is always awesome. Snow takes him down to the mat which frustrates the champ. Christian comes back with a foot on Snow’s face in the corner followed by a Russian legsweep for two. We hit the chinlock as the match slows down.
Snow fights up and hits his headbutts but Christian hits a tiger driver backbreaker for two. Snow gets rammed into the buckle and things slow down again. The trapping headbutts hit Christian again and Snow escapes the reverse DDT into a neckbreaker for two. Heyman schilling for the Alliance guy is always funny. A sitout powerbomb gets two for Snow and now Christian’s reverse DDT hits for no cover. Instead Christian talks a lot of trash and gets rolled up for two. A top rope cross body is rolled through by Snow and the Snow Plow gets two. There’s the Unprettier out of nowhere to keep the title in the Alliance. That was quick.
Rating: C-. This is one of those shows where anything but the main event means nothing, which makes the first hour and a half of the show pretty uninteresting to sit through. This match was fine but it could have been on Smackdown on any given week. Snow and Christian are both good hands so a good match is really nothing shocking at all.
Austin arrives and yells at the Alliance. He doesn’t like being accused of being a traitor to the Alliance. This would be a lot better if Stephanie had more acting ability than say, a carrot. Austin yells at everyone on the team and says stop being paranoid.
Vince and Linda arrive with Vince brimming with confidence. Cole comes up and says this might be their last night in business but Vince doesn’t want to hear talk like that. Vince talks about taking calculated risks and being confident because someone is jumping to the WWF. Regal comes up and says he doesn’t buy the idea that Austin is jumping back to the WWF.
William Regal vs. Tajiri
Regal hurt Tajiri’s girlfriend Torrie on Smackdown to set this up. Also these two used to be friends. Tajiri is Cruiserweight Champion and was supposed to face X-Pac in a title for title match, but according to Commissioner Mick Foley, “No one cared about X-Pac or the Light Heavyweight Title anyway”. Tajiri fires off a kick but gets suplexed right back down.
The knee trembler takes Tajiri down but Tajiri goes after Regal’s knee with the kicks. There’s the Tarantula and Regal is bleeding from the nose. A handspring elbow gets two for Tajiri but Regal ties his head up in the ropes to stop the momentum dead. Regal tries a powerbomb but gets countered by another kick to the head. The Buzzsaw Kick misses and there’s the Tiger Bomb from Regal for the pin. Too short to rate but it was fine. Short, but fine.
Regal powerbombs him again post match. Torrie (looking GREAT in a purple top and leather pants) comes out to check on Tajiri, only to get powerbombed as well.
We recap Edge vs. Test. These two are both midcard champions after the seemingly dozens of never ending midcard title changes going on at this point. Edge is US Champion, Test is IC Champion, tonight only one belt survives.
Test complains about the makeup lady not rubbing in the oil well enough on him. Stacy comes up and agrees with Test. Test hits on her and she’ll think about it if he wins.
Edge compares himself to Test and says that there are a lot of similarities between them. The difference is that Edge hasn’t been dumped by every chick on the planet. Edge makes fun of Test for sounding wooden and that’s about it.
Intercontinental Title/US Title: Edge vs. Test
They fight over control to start with Edge taking over via a series of forearms to the head. Test powers him down and goes after the ribs with a wide ranging selection of stomps. We head to the floor with Edge being dropped across the barricade to further the attack on the ribs. Back in and Edge hits a dropkick to take over before we head outside again. Back in quickly and a swinging neckbreaker gets two for Edge.
Test drops Edge onto the top rope ribs first to reinjure him and the taller of the blonde Canadian champions takes over again. Test puts on a chinlock as the match slows down again. Edge fights up and avoids a corner charge before hitting a middle rope missile dropkick for two. A middle rope cross body misses though and Test puts him on the top rope.
Edge blocks a superplex with some CANADIAN right hands to the ribs but a sunset bomb doesn’t work. Test dives off the top but jumps right into a dropkick to put him down. The problem with this match is neither guy has been able to build up any kind of a run with the title as both have changed hands four times since the InVasion began about four months ago. How can you get behind either guy as a big time champion in that little bit of time? On top of that, Edge has been champion for six days and Test for thirteen. That’s not exactly Honky Tonk Man unifying with Luger in the late 80s.
Both guys are down now but it’s Edge up first with some clotheslines and a spinwheel kick. Test’s pumphandle slam is countered into the Edge-O-Matic for two. Test spears Edge down for two but the big boot misses. There’s the pumphandle for two but Test’s powerbomb is countered into a rana. Edge’s spear gets a close two but he can’t hit the Edgecution. Test tries a full nelson slam but Edge rolls through for the pin and both titles.
Rating: C+. This started pretty slow but it got going once Edge was able to start countering Test’s power stuff. In other words, Edge did the work to make Test’s generic big man offense look decent. This was probably the match of the night, which isn’t surprising given how hot Edge got in the next year.
Angle comes up to see a stressed out Stephanie. My goodness her acting is bad. I know I say that a lot, but IT’S FREAKING TERRIBLE. She says if the Alliance loses tonight, she’ll have to buy her own groceries and wash her own car. She can’t be a…..a…..a REGULAR PERSON!!! Angle reminds her that she’s special and doesn’t think Austin will jump.
A cage is lowered.
Jeff and Lita are talking about Matt being different lately. Matt comes up and yells at them for acting strange and not being focused enough. It turns into a rallying speech and things seem ok. The guys leave and Trish comes out of the same locker room Matt came out of earlier. It says Team WWF so maybe there’s nothing there……..but maybe there is. DUN DUN DUN!
WCW Tag Titles/WWF Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boys
In a cage. The Dudleys are WCW Champions and the Hardys are the WWF Champions and Stacy is STUNNING at this point as the Dudleys’ manager. All four belts get laid out between the guys in the ring and it’s time to go. There are tags required here and it’s Matt vs. Bubba to start. Matt can’t get anywhere so it’s off to Jeff who walks into a Boss Man Slam for two.
D-Von comes in as Heyman talks about Big Daddy Dudley which JR could not care less about. Back to Matt who rolls D-Von up for two but walks into a reverse inverted DDT for two. Bubba comes in again and drops a bunch of elbows for two. The Dudleys tag in and out a lot and it’s back to Bubba for more punching to Matt’s ribs. Bubba tries to ram Matt into the cage but Matt counters into a reverse DDT.
Off to Jeff who cleans house as everything breaks down quickly. Poetry in Motion hits Bubba and Matt climbs but D-Von makes the save. It’s pin/submission/double escape to win here and there’s a Bubba Bomb off the top to Jeff. Wouldn’t that hurt both of them equally? Bubba goes up again but Matt slams him down for two. Matt gets rammed into the cage but when the Dudleys try to do the same to Jeff, he grabs the cage and tries to climb out, only to get caught in a Doomsday Device (Paul: “WHAT A RUSH!”).
Matt gets crushed against the cage and Bubba whips D-Von into him for good measure. Bubba splashes him as well and the Dudleys are in full control. Jeff gets in a shot and Matt hits a top rope double clothesline to shift the momentum just as fast though. A DDT puts Bubba down for two and Jeff hits the legdrop between D-Von’s legs. A double backdrop takes Ray down again and the Hardys go up.
Matt hits a legdrop and Jeff hits a splash off the top at the same time for two on Bubba. Matt makes a climb but gets pulled down with one leg still stuck in the cage. What’s Up to Jeff and Bubba asks Stacy for a table. Stacy hits on Nick Patrick and picks the key out of his pocket. There’s a table in the ring now but Matt breaks up the 3D by jumping Bubba. Why D-Von didn’t flapjack Jeff through the table is anyone’s guess.
Bubba and Matt go tot he top and pound away at each other until Bubba is knocked down. Matt climbs down to escape but he’s left alone against the Dudleys. D-Von is rammed into the cage a few times and Jeff goes up as D-Von climbs onto the table for no apparent reason. Jeff looks down and sees D-Von there before diving off the top of the cage, but the Swanton misses. Bubba covers the table and therefore Jeff as well for the pin and the titles.
Rating: B-. This was the usual good brawl between these teams and it furthers the Hardys’ issues, but at the end of the day this feud was played out at this point. There was nothing left for these two teams to do and at this point it was being dragged out way too far. Still though, good match and a good way to I believe finally end this nearly two year long feud.
Jeff is taken out on a stretcher.
Mick Foley is at WWF New York and admits that his job (WWF Commissioner) means nothing.
Scotty 2 Hotty is about to be in the Immunity Battle Royal but Test beats him up to take his spot.
Immunity Battle Royal
Test, Billy Gunn, Bradshaw, Farrooq, Lance Storm, Billy Kidman, Diamond Dallas Page, Albert, Tazz, Perry Saturn, Raven, Chuck Palumbo, Crash Holly, Justin Credible, Shawn Stasiak, Steven Richards, Tommy Dreamer, The Hurricane, Spike Dudley, Hugh Morrus, Chavo Guerrero Jr., Funaki
No matter who wins the main event tonight, the winner of this is guaranteed a job for a year. Stasiak is thrown to the floor before the bell rings and is apparently out. Test drops to the floor to hide as Tazz comes in late. Since it’s a battle royal there’s really not much to talk about here. Everyone punches everyone and no one is put out for awhile. Heyman freaks out about Tazz because Tazz choked him out on Smackdown.
Hurricane dives at Farrooq and is clotheslined out by Bradshaw. Albert throws Saturn out and Test, who is back in now, dumps Farrooq. Page is put out by someone we can’t see and Storm superkicks Palumbo out. Morrus and Chavo run in as wildcards because they tried to jump from the Alliance to the WWF on Raw but got fired as a result. Billy dumps Chavo as Morrus is eliminated as well. Tazz dumps Dreamer and Crash as Storm low bridges Spike out. Bradshaw’s Clothesline kills Richards and he’s gone.
Tazz stops to run his mouth to Heyman and gets dumped by Billy. Test and I think Kidman put Albert out. We’re down to Bradshaw, Kidman, Gunn, Test and Storm. Sorry if I missed a bunch of eliminations but a lot of them weren’t shown. The fallaway slam puts Kidman out and we’re down to four. Bradshaw kicks Storm down and might have hurt his ankle. Things slow way down as Billy and Bradshaw hang on for dear life. Storm and Test team up to put Bradshaw out but Test dumps Storm as well. A big boot eliminates Gunn and Test wins immunity.
Rating: C-. Not bad here but at the end of the day, it’s a battle royal so what are you expecting to get here? Test would fall through the floor in the next year with no one caring about him at all. This was a pretty big batch of jobbers in there though and that doesn’t really make for an interesting match. Then again, neither do most battle royals.
Sacrifice video by Creed.
Booker is worried about Austin jumping. Shane says it’s ok and stick with it.
Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Ivory vs. Lita vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jacqueline vs. Jazz
Chyna relinquished the title earlier in the year without being pinned and then disappeared so this is the best we’ve got to pick from for the new champion. This is Jazz’s debut and NO ONE CARES. Why does no one care? Because Jazz meant nothing in ECW and was a face there but is a heel here. Jazz and Lita start things off with Jazz pounding away. Off to Jackie vs. Molly off some blind tags and somehow even fewer people care about Jackie.
Jackie dropkicks Molly down and it’s off to Ivory who gets caught in a sunset flip for two. This is one fall to a finish. Ivory slingshots Jackie into the ropes and it’s off to Trish who is looking very good in those little pink shorts of hers. Lita gets knocked to the floor and the three Alliance chicks (Ivory, Jazz, Molly) triple team Trish for a bit. Jackie double crosses Lita on Poetry in Motion and everyone hits their finishers on everyone else. The Litasault gets two on Ivory as Jazz saves. Lita gets backdropped to the floor and it’s Ivory vs. Trish left. Stratusfaction gives Trish I believe her first title.
Rating: D. It was short, the match wasn’t any good, Trish looked great in the skin tight barely there pink shorts, Lita looked good as usual, and that’s all I’ve got here. As usual with situations like this, when the previous champion doesn’t lose the title, the new champion comes in at a big disadvantage.
Vince looks at Team WWF and gives them a pep talk, bringing up names like Dr. Jerry Graham, Peter Maivia, Gorilla Monsoon (pop) and Andre the Giant (BIG pop). He understands he might be looking at a group of losers, and if that happens no one will ever forgive them. After listening to that speech, I want to go fight three WWF guys and one guy each from ECW and WCW!
We recap the main event which has been summed up pretty well already. Vince was replaced by Big Show and Rock and Jericho are having major issues. Rock is WCW champion and Austin is WWF Champion. This really does feel like a huge match. The video is set to Control by Puddle of Mudd which is a good song.
Basically Vince said that he was tired of all of the InVasion (I think a lot of us were at this point) and offered one winner take all match with the losing organization going out of business. Angle joined the Alliance after the announcement but Vince says Austin is coming back to the WWF, giving the Alliance reason to be concerned. Austin stunned Angle on TV recently to further that idea.
Team WWF vs. Team Alliance
The Rock, Chris Jericho, Big Show, Undertaker, Kane
Steve Austin, Kurt Angle, Booker T, Rob Van Dam, Shane McMahon
Everyone gets individual entrances so it takes forever to get to the start of the match. As those are going on, a few things to notice here: Team Alliance has one of the biggest WWF superstars ever, a guy that at this point had only wrestled in the WWF, a WCW guy, an ECW guy, and the then heir to the WWF throne.
Also, as goes the stereotype for the WWF, most of their guys are big and strong instead of the more athletic styles of the Alliance team. One other thing: JR keeps up one of the annoying inaccuracies in wrestling by saying that Taker won the world title in his WWF debut. It was a year later, which you should know if you’ve been reading my reviews like good minions.
Rock and Austin start fighting before the bell and you know the early advantage doesn’t mean a thing in this one. Austin hits the Thesz Press and the middle rope elbow for a very early two. Rock comes back with a middle finger elbow of his own and dares Shane to get in. Off to Booker who gets clotheslined down for two as Shane makes the save. Expect to hear that line for awhile. Off to Jericho as Heyman blames Vince for the end of ECW.
Van Dam and Jericho have a nice fast paced sequence with Jericho hitting a spinwheel kick for no cover. Jericho chops away but misses a dropkick, allowing Rob to hit the cartwheel into a moonsault for two. For reasons likely related to high levels of drug use, Van Dam tries a standing rana on Jericho, only to be countered into the Walls. Shane makes the third save of the match already and it’s off to Angle vs. Kane.
Angle gets thrown around but eventually slips behind Kane and hits a German Suplex for two. Kane comes back with a side slam and the top rope clothesline for two of his own as Shane saves again. Off to the Dead Man who pounds away but misses a charge into the corner, allowing Booker to get the tag. Taker immediately drops Booker and hits a legdrop, but Shane breaks up his fifth near fall of the match.
There’s Old School to Booker followed by that lifting wristlock which always looks painful. Off to a short armed scissors followed by a clothesline for two, resulting in ANOTHER save from Shane. Austin comes in to pound on Taker (and to cause Heyman to say WHAT after everything JR says) but he gets caught in Old School. Say it with me: Shane makes the save. Taker gets caught in the wrong corner and quintuple teamed.
Angle is in next and tries to slug it out with the Deadman for some reason. Taker escapes a German and DDTs Angle down. There’s the tag to Big Show and JR almost immediately bashes him, saying Show can make a huge difference, or he can make some huge mistakes. Show throws around RVD and Angle before clearing off the entire Alliance corner. Angle gets underneath Show and there’s the Slam followed by an Ax kick from Booker (and a Spinarooni) and a Five Star and a top rope elbow from Shane for the first elimination.
Shane dances around in celebration before turning around to meet The Rock who beats the living tar out of Shane with right hands in the corner. Off to Kane for a chokeslam, then a tombstone from Undertaker and a Lionsault from Jericho to tie it up. That’s the best way to go as Show and Shane were the weak links on both teams. Angle vs. Jericho now with Jericho hitting the forearm to start. A double underhook backbreaker puts Angle down but Austin saves.
Angle uses an amateur takedown and brings in Booker to slam Chris a few times. RVD gets a tag but one of his shoulders in the corner is countered into a sunset flip for two. Off to Kane who catches a punch from RVD. Van Dam’s comeback? Kick the guy in the head. Why make things too complicated? Kane pulls Booker in and kicks him in the face too but the numbers game allows Van Dam to take Kane down and hit the Five Star. Rob takes too long to cover though and gets caught in a chokeslam, but Booker kicks Kane down. Everything breaks down and Rob kicks Kane from the top for the pin to make it 4-3.
Taker pounds on Van Dam in the corner while everyone else is fighting on the floor. Austin and Angle get in as well and Taker has to fight all four guys at once. He gets them all in a corner and keeps charging at all of them with clotheslines in a cool sequence. Snake Eyes and a big boot take Angle down and there’s a Last Ride for him as well. Booker comes in with a chair but Taker boots him down, leaving himself open to a Stunner from Austin and the pin by Angle. That leaves us with Austin/Angle/Booker/RVD vs. Rock/Jericho.
Booker stomps on Rock but Rocky comes back with right hands. A side kick takes Rock right back down but Rock does the same with a DDT for two. Booker charges into a Samoan Drop for two as Austin makes the save. Rock whips Booker into Angle and grabs a rollup to eliminate Mr. T, making it 3-2.
Rob is in next but as he goes up, Rock kind of powerbombs him off the top for two. Jericho gets the tag and hits a running neckbreaker for two before chopping away in the corner. Van Dam avoids the Lionsault and kicks Chris’ head off, followed by the split legged moonsault for no cover. Jericho pops up and hits a Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) out of nowhere for the pin and the elimination to tie it up at two each.
Austin slingshots Rock into the post on the floor while Angle and Jericho fight in the ring. Angle picks Jericho’s ankle and stomps away on him as Heyman thinks the Alliance can find a place for the Rock. Back to Austin to pound away on Chris and hit a superplex for two. Austin hits a kind of northern lights/belly to belly suplex for two and here’s Angle again. Jericho puts Kurt in the ankle lock but Kurt quickly escapes and hits a clothesline to take over.
It’s back to Austin for a suplex and an elbow to the face. Angle comes in and stomps away before it’s back to Austin who stomps away as well. We hit one of the few chinlocks in this match as Jericho is in trouble. Jericho fights up and it’s a double tag to bring in Rock vs. Angle with the Great One quickly hooking a Sharpshooter on Kurt for an even faster tap. Heyman LOSES IT in a great moment.
Off to Austin vs. Jericho with Chris trying the Walls but Austin rakes the eyes to escape. Austin can’t put Jericho in the Boston crab either but he gets the knees up to block the Lionsault. Steve loads up a superplex but gets shoved down, followed by a missile dropkick for Jericho for two. Austin counters a rollup out of nowhere for the pin and the elimination to get us down to Rock vs. Austin. Did you expect it to be anything else?
Rock hits a bad spinebuster but Jericho hits a Breakdown on Rock to take him down in a double cross. It’s not joining the Alliance, but rather just personal hatred. That gets two for Austin and Taker comes out to stalk Jericho to the back. Austin pounds away before launching Rock over the top and out to the floor. They fight on the floor with Austin being laid on the table and slapped in the chest over and over.
Austin comes back but gets sent over the announce table and punched in the face by Rock. Back in Rock chops away but gets caught in the whip spinebuster from Austin. Austin puts on a bad Sharpshooter and there’s your Montreal reference. Rock finally makes the rope so Austin grabs the WWF Title. Rock ducks the swing and puts Austin the Sharpshooter but he’s afraid to let go of the belt for some reason. I guess realizing he has a job no matter what, he grabs the rope instead.
Back up and Austin’s Stunner is countered into a Stunner from Rock. Why that puts Rock down after Rock had been in control for awhile is beyond me but whatever. Rock covers but here’s Nick Patrick to pull Hebner out. A Rock Bottom to Patrick is broken up and Austin Rock Bottoms Rock for two. Austin drills Patrick and pulls Hebner back in, only to be sent into him again as Rock counters the Stunner. There’s the Stunner to Rock but there’s no referee. Angle runs in and nails Austin with the title, letting Rock hit the Rock Bottom for the pin and the death of the Alliance. JR to Heyman: “You’re out of work! AGAIN!”
Rating: A. This felt like a main event and was very entertaining too. It runs forty five minutes bell to bell and feels like about half of that. At the end of the day, it was pretty clear what was going to happen but that doesn’t make it a bad match. Rock vs. Austin was pretty much done for a long time after this match, which is the right call as they had run it a lot this year. Great stuff here though.
Everyone celebrates and Vince comes out for the big dramatic pose, because this whole storyline was all about Vince and his kids remember.
Overall Rating: B+. Like I said, as goes the main event, so goes the show. The rest of the show isn’t bad but the main event is over an hour counting buildup video and entrances and all that jazz. The rest of the show isn’t bad at all with a good cage match and nothing truly bad that didn’t involve Trish looking great, so I can’t complain much here. Also, it gets rid of the Alliance which makes things better already.
As for the InVasion, I’ve gone on at great length about it already, but in short form here: it was the biggest waste of time, money, and potential that there ever could be in wrestling. This was the biggest storyline you could possibly ask for and they BLEW IT. There are multiple options you could go with here. One idea is have no mention on TV of the WWF buying WCW and just keep it going with WWF guys in charge behind the scenes. Think a network might have been interested with it being under the direction of the biggest wrestling company ever?
Another option: have the Alliance win. At the end of the day any money they’ve got goes into the WWF’s pocket as they own EVERYTHING, so what difference does it make? Granted that was never going to happen with Vince’s ego, but why let money get in the way of Vince feeling good about himself? The InVasion could have been so much more but it wound up running about five months with the WWF dominating the whole way through. Such a shame and a loss for wrestling fans who had waited for so many years for a chance to have this happen.
Ratings Comparison
Christian vs. Al Snow
Original: C+
Redo: C-
William Regal vs. Tajiri
Original: C
Redo: N/A
Edge vs. Test
Original: B-
Redo: C+
Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boys
Original: B+
Redo: B-
Battle Royal
Original: N/A
Redo: C-
Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Jacqueline vs. Ivory vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jazz
Original: D+
Redo: D
Team WWF vs. Team Alliance
Original: B
Redo: A
Overall Rating
Original: C+
Redo: B+
Like I said, as the main event goes, so goes the show. That’s apparently the case here as I liked both better the second time around.