Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2018 (2019 Redo): Make Your Point

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 2018
Date: January 28, 2018
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,629
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T., Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

It’s hard to believe that a year has passed since this show as I can barely remember most of the card. This show features the first ever all women’s Royal Rumble, which really is quite the milestone. Now of course they had to bring in a bunch of legends/former wrestlers who aren’t legends but are called such to fill in the lineup, but there are worse things to do. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Kalisto/Gran Metalik/Lince Dorado vs. TJP/Jack Gallagher/Drew Gulak

They aren’t the Lucha House Party yet but they’re the Lucha House Party. As usual, the arena is still mostly empty because we need to be having a match an hour and a half before the show starts. Kalisto and Gulak start things off with a weak POWERPOINT chant annoying Drew. The announcers talk about the upcoming 205 Live General Manager as Kalisto twists the knee around into something like a reverse Figure Four. Gulak rolls out so it’s Metalik and Gallagher (in his suit of course) coming in instead.

A quick takedown sends Gallagher outside where he insists a fan not boo him. TJP comes in and that earns him a triple dab from the House Party. We settle down to TJP and Dorado exchanging wristlocks until Kalisto comes in for a headlock. The pace picks up again but this time it’s Gulak coming in and flying over the top to the floor. All three luchadors get on the top and it’s a triple moonsault to the floor to pop the dozens of fans in attendance.

Back from a break with TJP dropkicking Dorado out of the air so the heat segment can begin. Gallagher hits a surfboard double stomp on the knees and it’s off to a leg crank. Gulak stomps away and it’s back to TJP to look annoyed at Dorado for not staying down. Instead it’s Gallagher going to the middle rope and looking terrified, allowing Dorado to roll away. After a quick lecture, Gulak comes in as Metalik gets the hot tag to pick up the pace. The rope walk elbow gets two as everything breaks down. The double Golden Rewind sets up a big double dive from Metalik for two on Gulak. A quick Salida Del Sol finishes TJP at 13:13.

Rating: C. For the life of me I don’t get the point in having these matches this early. There’s no one there and while the action was fine, it’s not like there’s anyone to react to them. They had a nice match here though with the dives taking them wherever they wanted to go. 205 Live was still figuring out a bunch of things but the match worked well enough because people who can fly around are always going to be worth a look.

The crowd has filled in now.

Kickoff Show: Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson vs Revival

What a lack of a difference a year makes. Revival is fresh off getting beaten up by a bunch of legends Dawson chops at Anderson in the corner until a dropkick gets him out of trouble. Dawson makes a tag from the floor (not sure if you can do that) and the distraction lets him rake Gallows’ eyes, though it doesn’t really do much. The threat of a right hand sends Revival outside and we take a break. Back with Dawson snapping Anderson’s knee over the middle rope to give the Revival a target.

Anderson gets double teamed in the corner as the announcers ignore the match to talk about Brock Lesnar. The leglocking begins so Anderson kicks him square in the jaw for the break. That’s always going to work but it’s not enough to get the hot tag off to Gallows. Another kick away allows the tag to Gallows so the pace can pick up. House is cleaned but the Magic Killer is broken up as Anderson comes back in for some reason. Anderson is fine enough to hit a kick to the head in the corner, only to have a chop block finish Anderson at 9:14.

Rating: C. Another match that only served as filler for the sake of filling time, which is one of the most annoying things you can have. It’s a match that didn’t need to exist and only served to burn off a little more of the crowd’s energy before we get to the matches that actually matter. The match was fine, though just another match that didn’t serve much of a purpose.

Kickoff Show: US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Mojo Rawley

Open challenge it seems. Roode is defending, having won the title less than two weeks ago. Before the match, Roode talks about winning the title and being the Glorious One. Rawley plants him with a shoulder but Roode is right back with a hard clothesline. A Russian legsweep gets two but it’s way too early for a Glorious DDT. Instead Rawley sends him outside and into the barricade for two as we take a break. Back with Roode still in trouble as Rawley drives knees into the ribs.

We hit the chinlock until Roode belly to back suplexes his way to freedom. The Blockbuster is countered but Roode slips off and grabs a neckbreaker for two more. Now the Blockbuster gets two but the Glorious DDT is broken up again. A spinebuster gives Rawley two and he sends Roode shoulder first into the post. The running right hand is blocked with a boot though and the (not very) Glorious DDT retains the title at 7:37.

Rating: D+. I for one am very glad that we had to sit through this as well, with Roode barely breaking a sweat to retain the title in a match that was never in doubt. Roode isn’t exactly thrilling as a face but even worse is the fact that he got stuck with the US Title of Death, which has hurt just about everyone it’s touched for a long time now.

The opening video talks about the opportunity for all, both in the Royal Rumbles and in the triple threat. Thankfully the rest of the card gets some time as well, even if Brock Lesnar still looms over everyone.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Owens and Zayn are challenging in a handicap match as part of the Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon love/hate Owens/Zayn story which was more about Shane than anyone else. I miss Sami’s heel stuff as he really is someone you want to see get punched in the face. Owens lets Sami start but he tags right back out. It’s another tag a few seconds later as they’re clearly filling in time here. That’s not a complaint as there’s only so much that can be realistically done in a match like this.

AJ takes Owens down without much effort so Kevin slides to the floor and tags Sami in from the floor to a rather nice reaction. Sami headlocks AJ for little avail as Saxton GOES OFF on Graves in the most emotional outburst I’ve ever heard from him. A cheap shot lets Owens take over on AJ with a hard whip into the corner getting two. They head outside (Owens: “We’ll play outside!”) with AJ being whipped ribs first into the barricade.

Back in and Sami grabs a quickly broken chinlock, allowing AJ to come back up slugging away at Owens. A missed Cannonball in the corner bangs up Owens’ knee to put him down for a bit, allowing AJ to pull Sami off the top for a breather. Owens tries to come back in but can’t do much on the knee, meaning it’s back to Sami who charges into a boot in the corner.

The moonsault into the reverse DDT plants Sami but Owens is back up again. This time he throws AJ out of the corner but Styles catches Sami in a hurricanrana to send him outside. AJ grabs the Calf Crusher on Owens until Sami dives in for save. Owens, with his knee fine in a hurry, misses a charge into the post but is still able to superkick AJ into the Blue Thunder Bomb for a close two. Not exactly Sweet Chin Music into the Pedigree in the Cell but not bad. Important note: Sami had pinned AJ with the Blue Thunder Bomb earlier in the week, so the move was suddenly a threat. The little things like that can go a long way.

AJ slips out of a superplex attempt and scores with the Phenomenal Forearm to Sami as Owens makes a save. Sami dives over to Owens for a tag and gets sent outside, leaving Owens’ Pop Up Powerbomb to be countered into a rollup to retain AJ’s title at 15:50. The replay shows that Sami might not have actually tagged, meaning AJ pinned the wrong man.

Rating: C+. This was only going to be so good as you can only make AJ be so much of an underdog before he wins. Owens and Zayn are a great heel act but they just lost almost clean to one guy. Yeah it’s AJ Styles, but that’s not exactly the best way to present them. It doesn’t help that it’s just part of a story involving Shane McMahon as a screwy boss, but you know we’re not escaping him anymore.

Wrestlemania ad. I forgot how sick I got of that song.

Sami and Kevin complain to Shane about what happened and he really doesn’t care.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Chad Gable/Shelton Benjamin

Gable and Benjamin are challenging and this is 2/3 falls. Before the match, the Usos yell a lot about this being their house and how they’re going to win in the Uso Penitentiary. Shelton shoulders Jey down to start and Jey seems rather pleased. Gable comes in but a blind tag lets Jey come in and break up Rolling Chaos Theory. The challengers take a break on the floor before a chop block takes Jimmy’s knee out.

Shelton hits one of his own and it’s time to really work the knee over with a Robinsdale Crunch into a regular leglock. Some stereo running knees to the face drop Jimmy again and the charge continues to knock Jey off the apron as a bonus. Since WWE tends to do the same things over and over, the hot tag comes through a few seconds alter, allowing Jey to speed things up and hit a big dive to the floor.

Back in and a running hip attack in the corner looks to set up the Superfly Splash but Gable is up just in time. Some rollups get two as Shelton comes back in to load up a powerbomb. Chad has to dropkick Jimmy down instead though, leaving Shelton to powerbomb Jey into Jimmy instead. A good looking moonsault to the floor drops both Usos, though it’s not exactly enough to wake the fans up.

Rating: D+. The action wasn’t bad but what in the world was the point of the 2/3 falls stipulation? This was a watchable match but it wasn’t anything more than and the fans really didn’t care. I’m not sure what they were going for here and given that the whole show went over four hours, this really could have been cut to shave off nearly twenty minutes total.

Rumble By The Numbers. That never gets old.

Jerry Lawler comes out for commentary.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals here, which has hit and miss results. Rusev is in at #1 and Finn Balor is in at #2. Aiden English does Rusev’s intro to a very, very strong reaction. You knew Philadelphia would be a Rusev Day town. Rusev wastes no time in trying to dumb Balor but has to take him down for an elbow instead. The running spinwheel kick cuts Balor off again and it’s Rhyno in at #3. Makes sense in the ECW Arena and I could go for Lawler making fun of ECW forever. Rhyno starts cleaning house and it’s already time for the ECW chants. Clotheslines abound until Rusev spinwheel kicks Rhyno down as well.

Baron Corbin is in at #4 because I couldn’t even avoid him back then. Corbin cleans a bit of the house and catches a charging Rhyno with Deep Six. That’s enough to toss Rhyno but Balor dumps Corbin a few seconds later to get us back to two. Corbin isn’t cool with that and pulls Balor to the floor (not eliminated) for a whip into the barricade. Rusev takes End of Days and everyone is down. Heath Slater is in at #5 and gets dropped on the ramp to put everyone down again.

Elias, with guitar of course, is in at #6 and since everyone is down, let’s have a song! See, now this makes some sense and is a proper way to fill in some time and keep things fresh. After a kick to Slater on the way down the ramp, Elias confirms that the people do indeed want to walk with Elias. You always have to make sure of course. The song is about spitting in the face of the Rocky Statue (TOO FAR!) but the countdown clock cuts him off and it’s Andrade Cien Almas (NXT Champion with Zelina Vega) in at #7. Now that’s a nice move and having it happen the night after he won a classic match makes it even better.

Almas wastes no time in hitting the running knees in the corner but the hammerlock DDT is broken up. Bray Wyatt is in at #8 and walks rather to the ring rather quickly. Before he gets in, he beats Slater up on the floor and sends him into the barricade, meaning Slater still hasn’t gotten in yet. Balor gets up and saves Elias from Sister Abigail but gets knocked down as it’s all Wyatt. Big E. is in at #9 but first, we need to have some pancakes. A single belly to belly drops Wyatt, only to have Rusev pop up with a superkick to Big E.

Tye Dillinger somehow gets #10 again….but hang on a second as Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens jumps him from behind so Sami can take his spot (while knocking Slater down again to continue the running gag). That gives us Rusev, Balor, Slater (on the floor), Elias, Almas, Wyatt, Big E. and Zayn. Nothing of note happens until Sheamus is in at #11 and he even throws Slater inside….and gets clotheslined out just as fast. Sheamus’ shocked face is rather good, though the fans aren’t happy when Wyatt eliminates Slater a few seconds later. Everyone is down again until Xavier Woods is in at #12 so 2/3 of New Day can start to clean house, thereby waking the crowd up a bit.

The fans get way into the countdown as Apollo Crews is in at #13, which should kill the crowd all over again. I’m not sure why they’re so quiet here but maybe they’re waiting for the big finish instead. Again not much happens and it’s Shinsuke Nakamura at #14 to fill up the ring even more. The fans are into Nakamura as he starts cleaning house, including the running knee in the corner to get rid of Zayn for old times’ sake.

Cesaro is in at #15 and gets to clean house as the fans get behind Rusev. They’re quite fickle in Philadelphia. Kofi Kingston is in at #16 and the New Day is at full strength. Apollo nearly gorilla presses Cesaro out but gets sent to the apron himself, allowing Cesaro to uppercut him out. Jinder Mahal is in at #17 because we’re just that lucky. Woods dropkicks him into the corner but gets knocked off the top for the elimination. We didn’t even get anything from the full New Day in the whole thing?

Mahal gets rid of Big E. as well and it’s Seth Rollins in at #18 to a nice reaction. Rollins monkey flips Cesaro out as at least they’re keeping the eliminations flowing. Mahal goes to dump Kofi but Woods is still on the floor, meaning Kofi can land on him instead of the floor. Big E. offers a plate of pancakes for the other foot and a nice case of hopping lets Kofi get back in, complete with Big E. and Woods launching him back in. Trouble in Paradise eliminates Mahal and it’s time to cover him in pancakes. With the celebration rolling, Almas hits Kofi with the hammerlock DDT to get rid of Kofi.

Woken Matt Hardy is in at #19 (King: “Oh brother.”) and he goes straight for Elias with the rams into the corner. Matt and Bray get together and eliminate Rusev, much to the fans’ annoyance. That’s it for the teamwork as they slug it out and then eliminate each other to really clear the ring a bit. John Cena is in at #20, giving us Balor, Elias, Almas, Nakamura, Rollins and Cena. The other five are waiting for Cena and stomp him down, because they’re rather smart. They don’t go for the elimination though, because their intelligence is short sighted.

Cena dumps Elias (because Cena always ruins Elias’ night) and the Hurricane is in at #21, much to Cena’s shock. The Hurri-chokeslam is easily countered into an AA to get rid of Hurricane, who is shocked as well. Aiden English is in at #22 but the fans would rather argue about Cena. Adam Cole, with bad ribs, is in at #23 and you know these fans are going to like him. Balor (hey he’s still in this) eliminates English and it’s Randy Orton in at #24. Cena shrugs off an RKO attempt so Almas takes it instead and gets thrown out as the amount of entrants stays at a nice pace.

Titus O’Neil is in at #25 but no one seems worried about him. At least they know their history. Titus does actually beat up Nakamura in the corner as Cena and Orton have their contractually obligated fight until Intercontinental Champion The Miz is in at #26. That means house can be cleaned, including the YES Kicks to Rollins and Cena. A Skull Crushing Finale keeps Cena down but Rollins superkicks Miz.

Rey Mysterio makes a surprise appearance at lucky #27, marking his first appearance with the company since the night after Wrestlemania XXX. The pace gets to pick up and Cole is eliminated off a headscissors. Miz eats a 619 and it’s Roman Reigns in at #28 to tick the fans off in a bad way. Almost everyone gets a right hand until it’s a showdown with Miz, who took Reigns’ Intercontinental Title on Raw earlier in the week.

Dolph Ziggler is in at #30 (Cole: “I thought he retired or something!” This was after Ziggler vacated the US Title and walked out without ever mentioning what he was doing. And now he’s right back, apparently saying that the US Title means nothing. Anyway the final group is Balor, Nakamura, Cena, Orton, Mysterio, Reigns, Goldust and Ziggler. Cena tries an AA on Ziggler, who flips out and lands on his leg, which probably should have counted as full on impact. Goldust scores with the snap powerslam but Ziggler easily puts him out with a superkick.

Some tuning up the band takes too long though and Ziggler is knocked to the apron so Balor can knock him out. They vacated the title to give Ziggler a two minute cameo. Well done indeed. We’re down to six and that’s a CRAZY deep field, with Nakamura being the least successful in WWE. Balor takes an AA and it’s a 619 to Reigns, followed by an RKO to Nakamura (Lawler: “COVER HIM! COVER HIM! Oh wait….”).

Reigns gets up with a Superman Punch to Orton for an elimination but it’s Mysterio with a double 619 to Reigns and Cena. Balor breaks up a springboard though and Mysterio is out to leave us with four. Everyone is down in a corner until it’s Cena vs. Nakamura and Reigns vs. Balor. Nakamura and Balor are knocked down so it’s a Reigns vs. Cena showdown but nothing happens before the other two are right back up. Nakamura’s running knee in the corner rocks Balor but he gets back in, only to get kicked square in the head.

Reigns is back up for a save this time and NOW we get Reigns vs. Cena for the big showdown. The slugout goes to Reigns but Balor gets up and starts firing off Sling Blades. Kinshasa is cut off with a running double stomp from Balor, only to have Cena pop up and throw Balor out to get us down to three. A Superman Punch puts Nakamura down but he’s right back up to kick Cena to the apron. Another knee sends Cena to the floor and we’re down to Nakamura vs. Reigns. I think you know who the fans are behind here.

They slug it out in the middle and it’s a Superman Punch to put Nakamura in trouble. Nakamura is sent to the apron but comes back with a triangle choke over the ropes. That’s rather stupid, though it’s also broken up with a powerbomb. The spear is cut off by a kick to the face and the middle rope knee to the face drops Reigns. Kinshasa gets blocked by a tackle to the face (called a spear) but the second attempt works just fine. Reigns is out on his feet and Nakamura tosses him out for the win at 1:05:29.

Rating: B-. This is one where you’re going to have to think about things for a bit. First and foremost, the winner is a fine choice. Nakamura hadn’t broken through yet and this is the kind of win that can help him do that (it didn’t, but it could have). Second, the last fifteen minutes or so with the final group was great stuff and full of drama as you could see anyone winning.

The problem is everything else, which isn’t terrible but it’s also not too great. The first part barely meant anything with just Balor being there from the beginning until the end. There were a few nice surprises and it doesn’t drag terribly or anything, but you really could skip about the first half hour and not miss much. It’s a completely watchable Rumble but it’s in the middle of the pack at best.

Post match Nakamura (or Shin as Cole keeps calling him because WWE likes to make Cole sound like an idiot) picks AJ Styles for Wrestlemania to really pop the crowd. Sounds awesome to me and for the most part, it was.

Next year’s Rumble is in Phoenix.

The bosses of the show trade bragging barbs. Watching a year later, I can’t believe how stupid these look now. WWE really thinks that we care about these stupid battling brand arguments. I have no idea why, but but that’s been their narrative for years. Stephanie says that no matter who wins the Women’s Royal Rumble, everyone will be surprised. That’s some nice foreshadowing.

We look at the KFC Colonel Sanders Rumble, with Ric Flair reenacting the 1992 Royal Rumble to win the whole thing. I still think this is some fever dream that they managed to record.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Jason Jordan/Seth Rollins

Jordan and Rollins are defending after winning the belts on Christmas night. It’s pretty clear that Jordan is filling in for the injured Dean Ambrose and that’s not a bad thing. Rollins and Cesaro start things off with Rolling taking over off a flying mare (you don’t see that one very often). It’s off to Sheamus but a quick Cesaro distraction prevents Jordan from coming in, meaning Rollins is driven back into the corner.

An enziguri gets Rollins a breather as the crowd is eerily silent. Cesaro breaks up the hot tag attempt to Jordan and sends him into the post, leaving Rollins to hit a suicide dive on both challengers. The medics are out checking on Jordan, though that might be making sure he doesn’t fall asleep. Cesaro grabs a chinlock, which is the last thing this match could possibly need. Rollins fights up and tries the springboard but gets clotheslined down by Cesaro.

A Demolition Decapitator and a double backbreaker give the Bar two each and Rollins is in big trouble. Sheamus misses a charge into the post though, giving Rollins a breather as Jordan is STILL down. Rollins gets the Blockbuster on Cesaro, followed by the Falcon Arrow for two. Super White Noise is broken up and Jordan is finally on the apron for a tag. He immediately grabs his head though and tags himself out. That’s fine with the Bar, as the spike White Noise gets the titles back at 12:50.

Rating: D. As you probably guessed, this was Jordan’s last “match”. I know he wasn’t the most thrilling guy in the world, but he was getting the hang of things until his neck just gave out on him and there was no coming back. At least he got a nice run and there’s a very real chance that he could get back in the ring one day. It’s not exactly fair to call the match bad….but it was really quite bad and the fans were just gone in a terrible way.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network.

We recap the Universal Title match. Brock Lesnar is a monster, two other monsters are challenging for his title, Braun Strowman is really strong and broke some stuff.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kane vs. Braun Strowman

Lesnar is defending. Braun starts fast with running splashes in the corner and a running dropkick to Brock, followed by a knee to his head. Brock then UNLOADS on Strowman with right hands which look a lot like receipts from a former UFC Heavyweight Champion rather than working punches. Lesnar shouts something that sounds like SLOW DOWN as Kane gets back up. Brock grabs a chair which is knocked into his face, followed by a toss out to the floor.

Some shots with the steps put Lesnar and Kane down and it’s time for a pair of tables inside. With one set up in the corner, Strowman chokeslams Kane for two with Lesnar making the save. Three rolling German suplexes….don’t do much to Strowman, who powerslams Lesnar through a table for two. Kane shoulders Strowman through the other table in the corner but again, Strowman is right up. A German suplex sends Lesnar outside but he’s fine enough to hit an F5 to send Strowman through the announcers’ table.

With that not being enough, Lesnar turns the other announcers’ table onto Strowman, literally burying him. Another F5 sends Kane through the other announcers’ table, because we need three of them at ringside. Strowman is back up, because of course he is, and Lesnar isn’t sure what to do. Back in and Lesnar takes two powerslams, only to have Kane make the save with some chair shots to Strowman. Lesnar pops up, sends both of them into each other, and F5’s Kane onto the chair to retain at 11:00.

Rating: D. There were some good power spots in there but this match didn’t need to be on the card either. Lesnar won another match that didn’t do anything for him and then walked off with the title for two and a half months, which was the case for FAR too long. I get the idea of keeping Strowman warm but they’re taking way too long to get anywhere.

We recap the Women’s Royal Rumble. Stephanie McMahon announced that we needed one and everyone nodded along because that’s how WWE works.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals, Maria Menunos is guest ring announcer and Stephanie is on commentary. As she comes to the ring, the announcers are all over themselves to suck up to her, with lines like “she’s a trailblazer but would never admit it”. Alexa Bliss and Charlotte (reigning Women’s Champions) are sitting at ringside. Sasha Banks is in at #1 and pre-Man Becky Lynch is in at #2 for a feeling out process to start. Neither can grab a submission hold and it’s a double clothesline, allowing Sarah Logan to come in at #3 and pick the bones.

She goes after Becky first but stops to point at the sign, meaning Becky is staying in. A headbutt drops Banks so everyone stands around until it’s Mandy Rose in at #4. The near eliminations abound as Stephanie gets into full on “person having an unnatural conversation” mode with Corey, making her rather annoying in her own right. Lita is in at #5 (in a #timesup shirt) to really fire the fans up for the first time in awhile.

Sasha and Becky stare her down and we get the slugout, which is rather cool when you consider how much of an inspiration she and Trish Stratus were on the current generation. Stephanie talks about how she and Lita were close over the years….and actually mentions CHYNA, which I didn’t think was allowed. Well I guess it’s cool if you’re Stephanie. Mandy is sent to the apron and hits a knee to Lita, who eliminates her without much effort. Kairi Sane is in at #6 and it’s a double spear to Lynch and Banks.

The Insane Elbow hits Banks and there’s one to Becky as Tamina (all in white for some reason) is in at #7. Lita drops her with a DDT because Tamina isn’t very good, setting up Twists of Fate to Lynch and Banks. There’s the moonsault to both of them and Lita throws Tamina out. Becky gets rid of Lita a few seconds later and it’s Dana Brooke in at #8. She goes straight for Sane in the corner….and actually eliminates her in a pretty big upset. Torrie Wilson is in at #9 and we now have to pretend that she was anything more than eye candy because she wrestled fifteen years ago.

Logan dropkicks her down as a TORRIE WILSON chant begins. A backdrop and dropkick to the knee get rid of Dana and it’s Sonya Deville in at #10. That means a kick to the ribs to get rid of Torrie (yes she looked great, and that’s about the extent of her value here). Liv Morgan is in at #11 and we hear about how much she idolized Lita. That likely applies to almost everyone in the match, which is rather cool given that Lita was in the match.

Things settle down again and it’s Molly Holly in at #12 to a rather big reaction. She dumps Logan with ease and there’s the Molly Go Round to Banks. They both fall to the floor (not out) and it’s Lana in at #13. These people are just coming and going at this point with very little other than nostalgia holding things together. Lana takes Liv down with a rather impressive spear and it’s Michelle McCool in at #14.

The fans immediately chant for the Undertaker as Michelle dumps Sonya. Morgan is out as well and Michelle gets rid of Molly with ease. Lana gets back up and is dumped just as well. Becky and Sasha double team Michelle to little avail as Ruby Riott is in at #15. No one can get anywhere and it’s Vickie Guerrero (the obvious comedy spot) in at #16. A bunch of EXCUSE ME’s earn her an elimination and it’s Carmella in at #17, but Vickie blasts her with the Money in the Bank briefcase to leave her laying on the floor.

Natalya is in at #18 (Stephanie: “Here she comes.” Natalya gets “here she comes”?) but Carmella decks her on the floor before it’s time to start the strutting. The Bexploder puts her down though and everyone is on the mat for a breather. Kelly Kelly is in at #19 and opts for some kicks in the corner as Natalya eliminates Michelle.

It’s Naomi in at #20, giving us Sasha, Becky, Riott, Carmella, Natalya, Kelly Kelly and Naomi. A bunch of Rear Views clean house and a kick to the head drops Banks. Sasha gets sent outside (not out, again) but Becky doesn’t have the same luck as Riott gets rid of her. Jacqueline is in at #21 and goes after Kelly as very little is going on at the moment. Nia Jax is in at #22 and gets rid of Kelly and Jacqueline without much effort. Riott gets tossed as well so Naomi fires off kicks. Jax throws her onto the big pile but Naomi lands on the barricade.

As she tries to figure it out, the injured Ember Moon is in at #23 and slugs away with one arm. Naomi walks the barricade and gets to the timekeeper’s area where she steals Menunos’ chair to crawl over to the steps for the improbable save. Back in….and Nia dumps her with ease. With everyone else on the floor, Beth Phoenix is in at # 24 and it’s time for a showdown.

Beth avoids a charge in the corner but can’t get her up in the fireman’s carry. Another attempt works to a big reaction as Natalya gets back in. They can’t get rid of Nia as they knock her to the floor (enough already) instead. Natalya quickly turns on Beth and throws her out as Carmella comes back in. Having this many women on the floor is ridiculous as you can’t remember who is still in.

Asuka is in at #25 to strike away, setting up the big reunion fight with Ember. Moon is fine enough for a one armed Eclipse but Asuka throws her out a few seconds later. So much for that. Mickie James is in at #26 and grabs a neckbreaker on Natalya. A bunch of near eliminations go nowhere and it’s Nikki Bella in at lucky #27, to a strong pop because we live in a random and chaotic universe. There’s a springboard kick to the face to put Banks down and it’s a spear to Natalya. Nikki throws Carmella out but everyone jumps onto the superwoman known as Nikki until Brie Bella comes out of retirement to come in at #28.

That means it’s time for the YES chants and some horrible running knees. The Bellas get their big moment (because they haven’t had one in a few minutes) and Nia is knocked to the floor (say it with me: without being eliminated). Bayley is in at #29 and gets to clean house until Asuka kicks her in the head. Trish Stratus is in at #30, which is quite the moment, though it was always going to be her or Rousey. That gives us a final grouping of Banks, Natalya, Jax, Asuka, James, Nikki, Brie, Bayley and Trish.

After tackling Natalya, we get the Trish vs. Bellas showdown which I think only WWE believes matters. A double Stratusfaction drops the Bellas and it’s time for a real showdown with Trish vs. Mickie. The Stratusphere is blocked so Trish kicks her in the head for the elimination. Nia gets back in so the big beatdown is on with a couple of kicks sending her to the ropes. Everyone gets together for the elimination in a good moment. Sasha dumps Bayley in a bit of a stab in the back and it’s Natalya grabbing a Sharpshooter on Trish.

That’s broken up because it’s a worthless move here, allowing Trish to kick Natalya out to get us to five. Banks goes after Trish, who kicks her in the ribs and does Sasha’s dance (that works). That’s fine with Banks, who kicks Trish out but turns into Asuka. They decide to go for the Bellas but it winds up being all three going after Asuka in a smart move. Banks says she’s ready for Asuka and loads up the double knees in the corner, only to have the Bellas turn on her.

That leaves Asuka and the Bellas (plus probably fourteen women on the floor as you never can tell) with the former firing off kicks to both of them. Brie gets sent to the apron but Nikki cuts Asuka off with the Rack Attack 2.0. A forearm knocks Brie out though as the sisters fight again. Asuka hits the missile dropkick on Nikki but she’s right back with a kick to the face. They both wind up on the apron with Asuka kicking the leg out (barely) for the win at 58:57.

Rating: B-. I remember being confused about what to think of this one last year and that’s the case again here. The legends needed to be there to flesh out the match and while there were some other options (NXT), I can go with this for the sake of history. This was designed to be more of a history of women’s wrestling over the years and there’s nothing wrong with that. They did a great job of making me want to see who was next as it was a nice mixture of all those generations. Having the nice mixture worked well and the right person won, so it’s hard to complain all that much. Stephanie was fine, though rather unnecessary.

Post match Charlotte and Alexa get in the ring to hold up the titles….and here’s Ronda Rousey to a huge reaction because she’s a star that was rumored to be in Columbia for this show. We get the most awkward sign pointing of all time (there’s an art to it) but Asuka won’t shake her hand. A bunch of staring and then high fiving fans, plus a handshake with Stephanie ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. It wasn’t a very good show, but the two namesake matches delivered well enough and only the Universal Title match was really bad. The big story here was Ronda of course and that delivered (awkward pointing aside) so it’s hard to really call this anything but pretty good. The wrestling wasn’t great overall and, again, the show was way too long but the important stuff worked well and that’s how you get a nice show.

Ratings Comparison

Lucha House Party vs. TJP/Jack Gallagher/Drew Gulak

Original: C

Redo: C

Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson vs. Revival

Original: C

Redo: C

Bobby Roode vs. Mojo Rawley

Original: D

Redo: D+

Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: C+

Usos vs. Chad Gable/Shelton Benjamin

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Men’s Royal Rumble

Original: A

Redo: B-

Seth Rollins/Jason Jordan vs. The Bar

Original: C-

Redo: D

Brock Lesnar vs. Kane vs. Braun Strowman

Original: B-

Redo: D

Women’s Royal Rumble

Original: B

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: C+

I don’t remember the last time I was that far off on so many matches. I mean….dang man.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/01/28/royal-rumble-2018-i-had-fun-again/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2018 (Original): Their Turn

IMG Credit: WWE

Royal Rumble 2018
Date: January 28, 2018
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Booker T.

The big night is finally here and for the first time ever we have two Royal Rumbles in one night. This time around we have a women’s version to go with the standard men’s version and that opens up the doors for a lot more surprise entrants. Of course it also opens the door for a lot more boring action if the last few Rumbles are any indication. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Drew Gulak/TJP/Jack Gallagher vs. Kalisto/Gran Metalik/Lince Dorado

Drew takes Kalisto down by the arm to start as the announcers talk about the upcoming 205 Live General Manager. That just earns a few chants from the crowd, which Gulak of course can’t stand. It’s off to Gallagher vs. Metalik with Gran working on the knee until Lince and TJP come in to complete each trio’s ring time.

The announcers discuss dabbing until the villains are all sent outside. The three masked men hit stereo moonsaults from the same turnbuckle (very cool) to the floor as we take a break. Back with TJP kicking Lince in the ribs and handing it off to Gulak, who drops Dorado’s partners off the apron. Now the announcers speculate on the next General Manager, which is much more focused than you would expect from these guys.

Jack cranks on Dorado’s leg as about half of the HUGE group of empty seats opposite the hard camera is filled in. But hey, at least we have a meaningless match going on an hour and a half before the rest show starts. Gallagher goes to the middle rope, pauses to listen to Gulak telling him not to jump, and then misses a dive anyway. The hot tag brings in Metalik for the rope walk into the dropkick to put Gulak down. The rope walk elbow works just as well for two as everything breaks down. Stereo dives take Gallagher and Gulak down, leaving the Salida Del Sol to finish TJP at 13:13.

Rating: C. Take any match between some combination of these guys that you might have seen on 205 Live and add five minutes to get this match. I’m not sure how that’s supposed to entice me to watch a pay per view but I’m sure WWE is smarter than I am on that front. Nothing special here, outside of that triple moonsault that is. This would have been fine as the only dark match but with two more, it could have been cut.

Kickoff Show: Revival vs. Anderson and Gallows

Rematch from Monday where Anderson and Gallows won, followed by the Revival getting destroyed by DX and Scott Hall. The Brian Pillman style trunks don’t really suit Revival but anything is better than Monday. Dawson gets sent outside to start for a breather before it’s Gallows tossing both of them around. Back from a break with Dawson working on Anderson’s knee with a string of elbow drops.

Wilder comes in to crank the knee even more but Anderson keeps kicking him away. Therefore, in a good tag team idea, Revival double teams him to keep the advantage. Now why is that so hard to figure out? Of course the hot tag goes through a few seconds later but at least they were trying. Everything breaks down and Gallows scores with a splash for two. Everything breaks down and the Magic Killer is broken up. Dawson sidesteps a charge to post Gallows and Dash’s chop block is good for the pin on Anderson at 9:11.

Rating: C. Well, it was better than Monday. I’m glad Revival won and now of course we’re likely to have the rubber match tomorrow night because WWE loves their trilogies. The leg stuff was fine here but the break in the middle didn’t do it many favors. At least the right team won though and that helps a lot.

Kickoff Show: Bobby Roode vs. ???

Roode is defending in an Open Challenge answered by….Mojo Rawley. The fans think Mojo sucks as he sends Roode into the corner and actually hammers him down as we take a break. Back with Mojo driving knees in the corner and grabbing a chinlock. Roode fights up and hits a running forearm, followed by a neckbreaker for two. There’s the Blockbuster but the Glorious DDT is countered into a spinebuster. Back up and another Glorious DDT is countered into a backdrop but the running punch is blocked. Instead it’s a regular DDT to retain the title at 7:37.

Rating: D. This could have been on any house show and that’s not good as the Kickoff Show main event. Roode doesn’t have a ton of challengers and a lot of that is due to how so few people were treated as important for the sake of Jinder Mahal. They need some kind of a feud going here and Rawley isn’t the kind of person to do that.

The opening video doesn’t say much out of the ordinary but it does a very good job of setting up the big matches while treating the Rumble win as a big deal. It’s very nice that they gave the match some shine for once because they haven’t exactly treated it like it matters up to this point.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn

AJ is defending in a handicap match. The challengers do have to tag and it’s Sami starting for the team. No contact and it’s off to Owens, who hangs on the ropes instead of going after the champ. Sami is already back in as there’s almost no contact in the first minute and a half. AJ wrestles Sami down but it’s already back to Owens, who takes AJ down, runs to the floor and tags Sami back in.

That means a drop down into a dropkick for Zayn as Byron and Graves have ANOTHER stupid argument that completely ignores the match. There’s a backdrop for two on AJ as the fans aren’t sure who to cheer for. Owens comes back in and unloads with right hands before sending AJ into the barricade. Almost all challengers so far. Owens gets in a double stomp and brings AJ into the corner for more right hands. An electric chair faceplant is good for two more and it’s off to the chinlock.

AJ fights up again and gets in a shot to Owens’ ankle, which was banged up on Smackdown in the first place. The Pele is enough to bring Sami back in but the Helluva Kick is blocked with a raised boot. Everything breaks down and Owens monkey flips Styles, who hurricanranas Zayn to the floor instead of crashing to the mat. The Calf Crusher has Owens ready to tap until Sami dives back in for the save.

Owens kicks AJ in the back of the head to knock him into the Blue Thunder Bomb, which of course only gets two (once in a lifetime you see). Another kick to the head puts Sami down this time and the springboard 450 is good for another near fall. They slug it out with AJ throwing Sami to the floor, only to eat a superkick from Owens. The Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into a rollup though and AJ retains (pinning the illegal man) at 16:08.

Rating: B. About what was expected here as there’s only so much you can do when the participants have been treated as background characters. I’m glad Bryan and Shane were left out but the match has been booked to make them the stars, meaning this is likely to continue. Some good action here, but it wasn’t the most thrilling match in the world.

Wrestlemania XXXIV ad.

Sami and Kevin ask Shane what he’s going to do. They can’t have another referee screw Owens out of another title. Shane says that yep, he did indeed see that. Nothing else is said.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Shelton Benjamin/Chad Gable

The Usos are defending and this is 2/3 falls after Gable pinned the wrong Uso a few weeks back. In other words, the same ending as the previous match, again showing the limited creative abilities of WWE. Gable can’t hit a German suplex on Jimmy to start so it’s some chops to the chest in the corner. A distraction lets Chad get in a chop block though and Jimmy is in trouble early on.

Benjamin drives knees into the bad knee as the challengers start cutting the ring off for an old NWA feel. Shelton stops to yell at the crowd though and it’s an enziguri to cut him off. The hot tag brings in Jey, who dives through the ropes to take out both challengers in a row. Back in and Gable gets two off a tiger suplex (I haven’t seen that one in years), followed by a powerbomb to send Jey into Jimmy.

Pay Dirt gives Shelton two and the bug eyed look on the kickout is funnier than it should be. It’s back to Gable who moonsaults onto both champions on the floor but Gable can’t pin the illegal Uso. That means a superkick into the Superfly Splash for two in a surprise near fall. The double Superfly Splash is broken up so Gable loads up Rolling Chaos Theory.

That’s broken up as well and four straight superkicks end Gable at 12:21. Gable and Benjamin beat the heck out of both champs to start the second fall. A rolling Liger Kick hits Jey and Chad goes up, leaving Shelton to get small packaged to retain the titles in two straight falls at 13:47.

Rating: B-. That was kind of a surprising ending but it’s not like it really matters. The Bludgeon Brothers (who have kind of disappeared in recent weeks) are pretty clearly the next challengers and it should be a fun match when we get to it. I’m not sure what happens to Benjamin and Gable at this point but they’ve proven to be a good team who deserve more time.

Rumble by the Numbers video.

Jerry Lawler joins commentary for the Rumble.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals this year. Rusev is #1 (with Aiden English singing him to the ring) and Finn Balor (in red here) is in at #2 to a very strong reaction. Balor gets sent to the apron early on but gets back in without too much effort. Rhyno is in at #3 and gets in a showdown with Rusev that doesn’t go much of anywhere. Balor is back up and it’s Baron Corbin in at #4 to quickly eliminate Rhyno.

Finn is right behind Corbin though and gets rid of him as well, sending Corbin into a rage. That means Balor is pulled to the floor for a whip into the barricade (shoulder first) and End of Days on the floor to Rusev. Heath Slater is in at #5 and gets run over on the ramp. Everyone is down and it’s Elias in at #6, playing the guitar (and kicking Slater in the head) on the way to the ring.

It’s time for a song about spitting in the Rocky statue’s face but the countdown clock cuts him off. NXT Champion Andrade Cien Almas is in at #7 (running Slater over again as we have a running joke) and a running elbow puts Elias into the corner. The running knees rock Elias again but the hammerlock DDT is broken up. A hard clothesline drops Almas and it’s Bray Wyatt in at #8.

Naturally Slater gets laid out again and there’s a release Rock Bottom to Elias. Balor comes back in to break up Sister Abigail (again, thank goodness). Big E. is in at #9 and gives Slater some pancakes instead of beating him up. Bray is waiting on him with Cole saying Bray has been so dominating since entering. IT’S BEEN LIKE TWO MINUTES!

Rusev is back in but can’t get rid of Almas. Tye Dillinger is in at #10 (again), giving us Balor, Rusev, Slater (still not in the ring), Elias, Almas, Wyatt, Big E. and Dillinger. Actually hang on a second as we cut to the back to see Dillinger getting beaten down by Owens and Zayn. Sami is taking his place and continues the tradition by jumping Slater.

Sheamus is in at #11 and throws Slater in….who immediately eliminates Sheamus (on his BIRTHDAY). Bray dumps Slater almost immediately and it’s Xavier Woods in at #12. Woods and Big E. double team Sami and a wheelbarrow slam into a splash hits Elias. Rusev can’t get rid of Big E. and it’s Apollo Crews in at #13. Apollo gets in a good looking jumping enziguri on Bray as Byron is now anti-Zayn as he tries to show a personality.

Balor escapes Sister Abigail and it’s Shinsuke Nakamura in at #14. Sami is waiting on him in a Takeover: Dallas flashback as the fans sing Nakamura’s song. There are WAY too many people in there and some eliminations are needed. Nakamura fires off some kicks and it’s Good Vibrations for Elias. The running knee in the corner gets rid of Sami and Cesaro is in at #15, giving us Balor, Rusev, Elias, Almas, Wyatt, Big E., Woods, Crews, Nakamura and Cesaro.

Uppercuts abound without much happening and it’s Kofi Kingston in at #16 to put New Day at full strength. Cesaro cuts him off with an uppercut but Crews gorilla presses Cesaro….to the apron at least but he gets back in. Instead a shot to the back gets rid of Crews to thin the ring out a bit. Jinder Mahal is in at #17 and goes after Woods, who dropkicks him into the corner. Woods is dumped a few seconds later though and Mahal gets rid of Big E. as well.

Seth Rollins is in at #18 (now with flames on his tights) and gets rid of Cesaro in short order. Mahal sends Kofi over the top but he lands on Xavier….and then on a plate of pancakes. Big E. and Woods launch him from the floor over the ropes and over Mahal, who gets caught with Trouble in Paradise for the elimination. As the rest of New Day throws pancakes at Mahal, Almas hits the hammerlock DDT and eliminates Kofi in a pretty big upset.

Matt Hardy is in at #19 for a standoff with Bray, which is broken up by Rusev. Bray and Matt actually start working together and get rid of Rusev (the fans are NOT pleased) before fighting each other. They eliminate each other and it’s John Cena at #20, giving us Balor, Elias, Almas, Nakamura, Rollins and Cena.

Everyone jumps Cena at the same time in a smart move but then let him up, allowing him to AA Elias out. The Hurricane of all people is in at #22 (which Cole calls a superhero persona which was a huge hit with kids years ago) and tries a chokeslam but gets tossed out by Cena. Hurricane lands on the pancakes, nearly slips, and then does his pose over and over again on the way to the back. Aiden English is in at #22 and goes after Rollins before switching to Balor.

Adam Cole (with taped ribs) from NXT is in at #23 to a very nice reaction. Balor kicks English off the ropes for an elimination and it’s Randy Orton in at #24. An RKO drops Almas and there he goes after a strong performance. Things settle down a bit and it’s Titus O’Neil in at #25. Cole gets sent to the apron but slides back in, leaving Titus to chop Nakamura in the corner. Miz is in at #26 and starts fast with the YES Kicks, followed by a Skull Crushing Finale on Cena.

Lucky #27 is the returning Rey Mysterio to get rid of Cole in a hurry. The Miz takes 619 and it’s Roman Reigns in at #28. You can feel the pain from the booing. Reigns goes after Miz and hits the jumping clothesline, followed by the clotheslines in the corner. Titus gets eliminated but the Miztourage saves Miz from the same fate. Rollins Curb Stomps Miz but gets into a showdown with Reigns. A DoubleBomb gets rid of Miz but Reigns turns on Rollins to get rid of him as well.

Goldust is in at #29 and hurts himself headbutting Reigns. Cena gets beaten up as well and it’s Dolph Ziggler (POP) in at #30, giving us a final group of Balor, Nakamura, Cena, Orton, Mysterio, Reigns, Goldust and Ziggler. Goldust is out in a hurry and Balor kicks Ziggler out, making him one of the most inconsequential #30s in recent memory. Rey, Cena and Orton get together in one corner, Nakamura and Balor are in another and Reigns is on his own (how appropriate).

Balor takes a quick AA followed by the 619 to Reigns. There’s an RKO to Nakamura but Cena blocks another attempt. A Superman Punch lets Reigns get rid of Orton and a double 619 hits Reigns and Cena (with Cena loudly talking to Reigns while they wait). Balor throws Mysterio out to get us down to four meaning everyone goes to a corner.

We get the big staredown as the fans are behind Nakamura. Cena throws a You Can’t See Me at Balor and hammers on Nakamura while Reigns beats on Balor. That gives us the big showdown as the fans think they both suck. No one throws a punch as Balor and Nakamura get back up, giving us a much better received showdown. The running knees in the corner put Balor on the apron but he kicks a charging Nakamura in the head. Another kick to the head rocks Balor but he scores with a basement dropkick.

Reigns and Cena are back up again with Cena charging into a Samoa drop. The Superman Punch is countered with a ProtoBomb but the Shuffle is broken up with a Sling Blade. Balor hits the shotgun dropkick on Reigns but Nakamura kicks Balor in the face. Balor’s standing double stomp cuts off Kinshasa and Cena tosses Balor to get us down to three. Reigns slips out of an AA and hits the Superman Punch on Cena. The spear is cut off by the AA and Nakamura puts Cena on the apron.

A running kick to the face gets rid of Cena and we’re down to Nakamura vs. Reigns. That means COME ON and Reigns does so with a Superman Punch. Reigns sends him to the apron but gets kicked in the head but Nakamura grabs a hanging triangle over the apron. A powerbomb brings Nakamura back in and they’re both down again.

It’s Reigns up first but the spear is cut off with a kick to the face. A middle rope knee to the face drops Reigns but Kinshasa is hit with a spear to put them both down again. Nakamura grabs the ropes to hang on and another running knee drops Roman, setting up the elimination to give Nakamura the win at 65:32.

Rating: A. Best Rumble in years, though that’s not exactly saying much. The important thing here was they went with a popular name to win the Rumble, which has been lacking in recent years. Nakamura winning really surprised me as I never thought they would actually do it but I’ll take what I can get.

They laid the match out nicely here as things took a little time to get going but the final ten to fifteen minutes were excellent with the final six all being solid options. I wasn’t dreading this one at all and it made the match that much better. This was a lot of fun and the way the Rumble should go, with one of the best endings in a long time. Great match.

The Smackdown bosses are celebrating in the back when Stephanie McMahon and Kurt Angle come in to say Raw will win later. Daniel and Shane (buddies again) don’t seem to care.

Post match Nakamura is asked who he wants to face at Wrestlemania. Fans: “PLEASE SAY STYLES!” Nakamura: “AJ STYLES!”

There was a Royal Rumble to determine the next Colonel Sanders with Ric Flair winning. He has the wrinkles for it.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Jason Jordan/Seth Rollins

Rollins and Jordan are defending with Seth and Sheamus starting things off. Seth gets driven into the corner with Cesaro offering a distraction to keep Jordan away from interfering. Jordan is ready for the hot tag but Cesaro pulls him down (I thought that was the heel turn) and posts him into near unconsciousness. Back in and Sheamus’ top rope clothesline gets two as the double beatdown is on, made especially worse by Seth’s long Rumble run.

Seth finally sends Sheamus into the post to get it back to even, followed by a Sling Blade and Blockbuster. Sheamus comes back in for the save but Rollins drops both of them for a double frog splash. As Seth gets up, Jordan is STILL sitting on the steps, leaving Sheamus to hit the Brogue Kick. The super White Noise gives us new champions at 13:03. Jordan was never in the match.

Rating: C-. This was an angle instead of a match and there’s nothing wrong with that. For some reason we seem to be waiting on Jordan vs. Rollins at Wrestlemania, even though that doesn’t quite blow my skirt up. The match was stuck in the cool down spot after the great Rumble and that was the right spot for it.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Basically you have three monsters fighting each other and breaking things to hurt each other, meaning it’s time to get violent.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kane vs. Braun Strowman

Brock is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Strowman wastes no time in cleaning house, including a hard knee to Brock’s head. That’s fine with Brock who starts throwing punches, only to have Kane score with a chokeslam. Brock grabs a chair but Braun punches it away and drops everyone.

Shots with the steps clean house and it’s time for a pair of tables. Strowman chokeslams Kane for two with Brock making the save and it’s time for Suplex City. Braun pops up like a daisy and powerslams Brock through a table with Kane making the save this time. Kane is tossed away again (it’s almost like he’s completely unnecessary in this match until the ending) and it’s time for the announcers’ table.

Braun takes too long though and it’s an F5 to drive him through instead. Brock turns the other table over Braun (Corey: “I’m about to throw this German guy in front of me!”) and F5’s Kane through another. Braun gets up again and sends Brock into the steps, followed by the powerslam. Kane makes the save and sends Braun outside, setting up an F5 onto the chair to retain Brock’s title at 10:12.

Rating: B-. Well duh. The world knows that Braun is ready to be World Champion and should have been like six months ago but Vince McMahon and seemingly Vince McMahon alone wants to see Reigns take the title from Brock. Again, as has been the case many, many times: none of this is important because we’re just sitting around waiting on Reigns to take the title like we’ve been waiting for for nearly a year now. After that, I have no idea where they go and I’m not sure WWE does either. This was fun, but exactly as expected.

Trailer for Andre the Giant’s HBO documentary.

We get a video on the women’s Royal Rumble with a focus on the Revolution (and Stephanie of course) with everyone talking about how important this is.

Maria Menunos is guest ring announcer and Stephanie McMahon is guest commentator, with Cole reading off her resume (and saying Stephanie will tell you about her trailblazing). Alexa Bliss and Charlotte come out to watch at ringside.

Women’s Royal Rumble

Sasha Banks (in Wonder Woman gear) is in at #1 and Becky Lynch is in at #2 to give us a good start. Becky blocks an early elimination attempt and we talk about how nervous Stephanie is. The Bank Statement is broken up and it’s a double clothesline as Sarah Logan is in at #3. Logan clotheslines Becky down but Sasha makes a questionable save. Becky gets stomped down in the corner and it’s Mandy Rose in at #4. Mandy can’t get rid of Sasha and it’s LITA in at #5.

Sasha and Becky aren’t sure what to do so they opt with kicking her in the stomach. Mandy jumps Lita from behind and gets placed on the apron, followed by a hard shot for the first elimination. Kairi Sane is in at #6 and chops Lita into the corner as Cole talks about her “yacht persona”. She’s not Ashley Remington (bet you didn’t think I knew that one) because SHE’S A FREAKING PIRATE! Sane kicks Sasha down and drops the Insane Elbow, followed by another to Becky as Tamina is in at #7.

Lita starts hitting the Twists of Fate and hits a double moonsault onto Sasha and Becky (more like her falling backwards instead of any kind of jump but give her a break). That means the YOU STILL GOT IT chant before she eliminates Tamina, only to get dumped by Becky. That’s all this needed to be from Lita and it worked to perfection. Dana Brooke is in at #8 and actually dumps Kairi before stomping on Sasha in the corner.

Torrie Wilson is in at #9 (oh give me a break) and it’s time to prove why she wasn’t a wrestler. Logan dropkicks her down but Torrie pops up and eliminates Dana. Sonya Deville is in at #10, giving us Banks, Lynch, Logan, Wilson and Deville. Sonya starts firing off knees and gets rid of Torrie (thank goodness). Liv Morgan is in at #11 so the Squad can start getting together. No one is tossed though and it’s Molly Holly in at #12.

Molly gets rid of Logan and hits the Molly Go Round on Sasha. Lana is in at #13 and is immediately taken down by Morgan and Deville. She actually gets fired up and slaps her way to freedom as Michelle McCool is in at #14. That means an UNDERTAKER chant as she gets rid of Logan, Morgan and Holly. Sasha and Becky are down on the floor (not eliminated) as Michelle gets rid of Lana as well. With Michelle alone, Becky and Sasha get back in and it’s Ruby Riott at #15, giving us Michelle, Becky, Sasha and Ruby.

Vickie Guerrero is in at #16 and shouts EXCUSE ME over and over but everyone stares her down. She tries to bail and is tossed with ease (I guessed that as a comedy spot and it’s as perfect as I thought it would be). Carmella is in at #17 but Vickie takes the Money in the Bank briefcase to knock her silly. Natalya is in at #18 and throws her gear on Carmella, who pulls Natalya off the apron. That’s enough for Carmella to get in for some superkicks and it’s Kelly Kelly in at #19. Kelly fends off an early elimination as Natalya gets rid of McCool.

Naomi is in at #20, giving us Banks, Lynch, Riott, Carmella, Natalya, Kelly and Naomi at the moment. Becky goes up for some reason and gets dumped by Riott. Jacqueline is in at #21 and goes after Kelly. Nia Jax is in at #22, meaning it’s time to clear the ring. Jacqueline is out first, followed by Kelly with ease. Natalya is sent outside (through the ropes), leaving Nia to press Riott onto the top turnbuckle and then out to the floor. Naomi goes after Nia’s legs but tries a hurricanrana.

Nia knocks her off the apron but the pile catches her, allowing Naomi to land on the barricade. NXT Women’s Champion (with a bad arm) is in at #23 with a springboard kick to Nia’s face. Nia sends her flying as Naomi is walking across the barricade to steal Maria’s chair on wheels. She then crawls across the floor using her hands and the wheels on the chair….only to have Nia catch her coming back in and toss her out. I smiled at the irony. Beth Phoenix is in at #24 and this could be a lot of fun.

Phoenix is a lot closer to Nia’s size than I expected and manages a fireman’s carry but can’t eliminate Nia. Natalya’s help doesn’t work very well as they knock Nia through the ropes. That means a hug and of course Natalya turns on her and gets rid of Beth. Carmella (never eliminated) comes back in to jump Natalya from behind….and it’s Asuka at #25. There’s the hip attack to Carmella and it’s time for the showdown with Ember Moon.

Ember actually hits a one armed Eclipse but Asuka goes after the bad arm and gets rid of her. Sasha (also never eliminated) gets back in and it’s Mickie James in at #26. That goes nowhere and it’s Nikki Bella getting lucky #27 (well duh). That means the JOHN CENA SUCKS song but Carmella takes Nikki into the corner for the Staten Island Shuffle (not the Moon Walk Stephanie). Nikki powers her up though and a neck snap across the top rope gets rid of Carmella.

Brie Bella is in at #28 to save her sister from a big beatdown. The Bellas get their big moment (their latest one for those of you who have lost track) and knock Nia off the apron. A double suplex puts Natalya down and it’s Bayley in at #29. Asuka kicks Bayley in the head in short order but can’t get rid of her. It’s Trish Stratus in at #30 (not exactly shocking and that’s not a bad thing) to give us a final group of Sasha, Natalya, Nia, Asuka, Mickie, Nikki, Brie, Bayley and Trish.

Stratus gets to clean house and hits a double Stratusfaction before getting into a showdown with Mickie. James misses a charge and gets tossed, meaning it’s time for everyone to go after Nia. She shrugs them all off but the Bellas choke her on the ropes, allowing everyone else to join in and get rid of Nia. Sasha of course turns on Bayley for the elimination and we’re down to six.

Natalya puts Trish in the Sharpshooter for some reason and is broken up just as quickly. The Chick Kick eliminates Natalya but Trish mocks Sasha’s Boss pose, meaning the Stratusfaction is broken up to get rid of Stratus. Sasha turns around to meet Asuka but they decide to get rid of the Bellas….for all of three seconds until Sasha decks Asuka from behind. Sasha calls the Bellas off so she can beat on Asuka in the corner but the Twins dump her out as she tries the double knees.

So we’re down to the Bellas and Asuka and it’s time for the YES Kicks to both Twins (there’s a joke there that I’m not touching). Brie gets sent to the apron but Nikki decks Asuka, followed by the Rack Attack 2.0. Nikki decks Brie to get rid of her though and it’s down to two. Asuka is on the apron and hits a missile dropkick but Nikki’s spinning middle rope kick catches her in the face. Nikki puts her on the apron for the big forearm….which doesn’t end it. Instead Asuka grabs a headscissors to put Nikki on the apron but Asuka kicks kicks her in the leg for the elimination to win at 58:47.

Rating: B. I know a lot of people are going to be annoyed about the amount of legends (and the amount of botches) in there but my goodness what else were you expecting? The women’s division is about twenty people deep and I’d rather have people like McCool, Lita and Trish in there to give us either a good performance or appearances from people who are legitimate trailblazers (not McCool obviously but she did quite well). I was surprised by the lack of NXT names but what we got was fine, save for the Iconic Duo still not appearing.

The match itself was fine, albeit a bit predictable. You knew Asuka was the heavy favorite and really, it’s not like there were many other solid options. Aside from Jax, who really else was there? Banks or Lynch? Well maybe, but Asuka getting the title needs to be a big deal and one of those two can take the other title. Either way…..uh, back in a minute.

Oh and Stephanie’s commentary was annoying but acceptable. She didn’t need to be there and added nothing at all but she could have been worse. Sounded very much like a fan who wasn’t the most polished but it was fine.

Overall Rating: A-. I loved the heck out of this show as they made the Rumbles FUN. That’s been sorely, sorely lacking in recent years and they made up for it tonight. The Rumbles are interesting by definition but above all else, these matches were a good time as I kept waiting to see who was coming out next. I was actually worried about Reigns and Nikki winning so well done on some false drama. This did everything it needed to do, including setting up a major Wrestlemania match. I had a great time with this show and that’s what the Rumble is supposed to be. Well done all around and a great show.

Results

AJ Styles b. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens – Rollup to Owens

Usos b. Chad Gable/Jason Jordan – Small package to Benjamin

Shinsuke Nakamura won the Royal Rumble last eliminating Roman Reigns

The Bar b. Seth Rollins/Jason Jordan – Super White Noise to Rollins

Brock Lesnar b. Kane and Braun Strowman – F5 to Kane

Asuka won the Royal Rumble last eliminating Nikki Bella

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – January 24, 2020: It’s Not That Important

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 24, 2020
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and that means we need the final push towards Houston. The men’s Royal Rumble is probably as set as we are going to get in advance but there are only give names announced for the women’s match. It’s hard to imagine not getting some names announced tonight and that is long overdue. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Usos/Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin/Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler

At least they’re getting it out of the way early. The Usos elbow Ziggler down and drop more elbows for a bonus, meaning it’s already off to Roode. Everything breaks down with Roode backdropping Jimmy to the floor and Ziggler sending him hard into the steps. It’s a knee injury and that means we’re going to be having a handicap match. Back with Jey coming in and being dragged into the wrong corner.

Jey slugs away on Corbin but walks into a heck of a Deep Six for two. Roode’s neckbreaker is good for the same and Ziggler gets in his big jumping elbow. The spinning enziguri drops Roode but Corbin pulls Reigns to the floor to break up the hot tag attempt. To make it even worse, Reigns is sent into the barricade a few times and we take a second break. Back with Jey still in trouble until he sends Corbin hard into the post.

The hot tag brings in Reigns to beat up Ziggler with the raw power as everyone else is knocked to the floor. Roode offers a distraction though and Corbin breaks up the spear, allowing Ziggler to hit a superkick for two. Reigns gets sent outside for the stomping and Ziggler drops another elbow for two more. Corbin comes back in and hammers away with right hands but the Glorious DDT (you knew that’s what it was going for as Roode shouted GLORIOUS and tried a DDT) is countered with a slam.

Ziggler pulls Jey off the apron though and sends him into the barricade, just like they did to Reigns earlier. The superkick is broken up with a Superman punch and here’s Jimmy back to ringside to get the hot tag. The knee is fine enough for the fired up comeback, including a high crossbody for two on Roode with Corbin making the save. Corbin gets Superman punched and Reigns throws him into the crowd. Jey dives onto Ziggler and Jimmy hits the Superfly Splash for the pin at 25:01.

Rating: C. I’d love for WWE to explain what they see in this feud to give it twenty five minutes to open the show, especially when Corbin vs. Reigns is likely to get nearly that much time on Sunday. The feud isn’t that interesting and odds are we’ll be seeing Roode/Ziggler vs. Usos added to Sunday as well. WAY too long here and they really could have cut ten minutes out and had a better match.

Video on Bayley vs. Lacey Evans.

Here’s Lacey for a chat. She has fought back against Bayley and Sasha Banks because she doesn’t put up with bullies. Her upbringing wasn’t all that great and her father lost his battle with addiction. Lacey wants to use her platform to show that you play the hand you’re dealt and you can make it. She’s worked hard to be a mom and a Marine and we see a clip of Banks mocking Lacey’s family. It’s hard to be a mother when your daughter is scared by two bullies….and here’s Bayley to jump her from behind. Bayley: “WHERE’S YOUR DAUGHTER NOW???”

Carmella and Dana Brooke are ready to win the Royal Rumble. We pan over to Lacey throwing Bayley into things so Dana and Carmella run over in a failed attempt to break it up.

Sonya and Mandy are in the Rumble too. They seemed to make up earlier in the day. Lacey Evans and Bayley brawl to the ring and it’s a double DQ at 21 seconds.

Elias is strumming his guitar when Braun Strowman comes in to say they need to go to work.

Here’s Elias to sing his new song, Texas Dream, which is a short one about the Rumble and a way to introduce Strowman. Before we get to the match, Elias asks the fans if they want to see Strowman sing with him. They start things up but here’s the interruption for, you know, some wrestling.

Elias/Braun Strowman vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Cesaro

Sami Zayn is out with Nakamura and Cesaro. Elias gets uppercutted to start but he sends Cesaro face first into the turnbuckle to get out of trouble. A Nakamura distraction gets Elias in trouble but Strowman runs people over as we take a break. Back with Elias in trouble but Kinshasa is broken up with a jumping knee to the face.

That’s enough for the hot tag to Strowman so house can be cleaned, including the big forearm to Nakamura’s chest. Nakamura comes back with the middle rope knee to the chest and Strowman is sent shoulder first into the post. Cesaro comes in but Sami’s distraction doesn’t work. The running powerslam plants Cesaro and Elias’ top rope elbow gets the pin at 8:31.

Rating: D+. Just a quick match here, almost in the vein of a house show actually. I’m a little surprised, as well as a bit relieved, that Strowman didn’t pin Nakamura again. They still haven’t announced the title match for Sunday so maybe they’ll wait a little longer before setting that up. Nakamura has held the title for a long time now and I’m curious to see how long he can keep going as champion.

We look back at Daniel Bryan challenging the Fiend to a strap match at the Rumble.

Big E. is VERY oiled up, which is his strategy to avoid being eliminated from the Royal Rumble. Kofi Kingston comes in and is ready for John Morrison tonight. They’re ready to go on to Houston for the Royal Rumble and this year it’s for Xavier Woods.

We look back at the opening match.

Corbin doesn’t like being asked questions.

Rumble By The Numbers time!

1070 total competitors

6,596 feet in height

1:16:06 Bryan lasted in 2018

56:01 Natalya lasted in 2019

1 second for Santino Marella

2003 Royal Rumble won by Brock Lesnar

7 people have won two Royal Rumbles

3 Royal Rumbles won by Steve Austin

2 others have won from #1

64,000,000 views of Royal Rumble videos since the Network launched

3 brands

2 Royal Rumbles

1 night

Note that they mentioned this being the 33rd Royal Rumble, though they now included the Greatest Royal Rumble in the record books.

Sheamus is ready for Shorty G.

Kofi Kingston vs. John Morrison

Before the match, Miz talks about how he’s the same person who lets you into his home every week on Miz and Mrs. Oh and he and Morrison are now in the Royal Rumble. They’re not exactly leaving many spots left. Morrison dodges away from Kofi to start so Kofi lands on his feet out of a monkey flip. Kofi’s monkey flip sends Morrison face first onto the mat and Morrison misses a dive over the top to crash on the floor. Kofi adds a flip dive so Miz is right over there for some applause.

Back from a break with Kofi kicking Morrison in the face and sliding through the legs, only to get kneed hard. Kofi is right back with a faceplant for two but Trouble In Paradise is kicked out of the air. The referee gets distracted for a bit so it’s a poke to the eye, setting up a middle rope Spanish Fly for a close two on Kofi. The SOS gives Kofi his own two but Big E. and Miz get into it on the floor. Kofi kicks Miz off the apron but gets knocked down, setting up Starship Pain (best one Morrison has hit in forever, and this time he jumped up instead of pulling himself up) for the pin on Kofi at 9:55.

Rating: C+. There was some good action in here and the ending should set up a Tag Team Title shot, in case they hadn’t done enough to get that ready yet. I’m not sure when they’ll do that match as the Rumble card is already loaded, but that has never stopped them before. Miz and Morrison still work well together though and that’s what matters.

It’s time for the contract signing for the strap match. Bray’s music hits but he comes up on screen instead, trying to fax in the contract from the Firefly Fun House. That might be better for everyone though because there is no reason to tie yourself to the Fiend. Bray tries to call customer service (Bray: “Yes. English or ancient Sumerian please.”) but Bryan wants him out here right now.

That isn’t happening due to Bray’s lawyer (Mercy the Buzzard) advising against it, so Bryan says he’s seeing through Bray. Bray hears Bryan mention a mistake and that is the Word of the Day. This is all about Bryan’s big mistake when he betrayed Wyatt and now it is time to pay. Since Bryan isn’t competing against Bray on Sunday, it’s only fitting that He sign the contract.

Cole bails as the lights go out and the Fiend is in the ring, holding the strap. Bryan goes after him and is Mandible Clawed in a hurry. Sister Abigail plants Bryan and Fiend rips off Bryan’s shirt for a whipping with the strap. Fiend sits down at the table and grabs the pen, which he stabs into his own hand. He rubs the blood over the contract and throws it at Bryan, which counts as signing (I don’t think evil monsters are that well versed in law). The lights go out and Fiend disappears to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Pretty meh show overall but it did a decent enough job of setting up Sunday. If nothing else it was nice to nearly double the amount of names in the women’s Royal Rumble. The wrestling was pretty lacking but that’s not usually the point on a show like this. Sunday is all that matters anyway and no one is going to remember this one after that anyway. Not much to see this week, but it’s one of the least important shows of the year anyway.

Results

Usos/Roman Reigns b. King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode – Superfly Splash to Roode

Braun Strowman/Elias b. Cesaro/Shinsuke Nakamura – Top rope elbow

John Morrison b. Kofi Kingston – Starship Pain

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – January 10, 2020: In Case It Wasn’t Boring Enough

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 10, 2020
Location: Ford Center Evansville, Evansville, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

We’re getting closer to the Royal Rumble and things started to pick up a lot this week on Raw. Therefore, you can probably assume the same thing here because these shows tend to follow each other. I’m sure we’ll get more from Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin now that the Usos are back, because this feud just needs to keep going. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

It’s MizTV to get things going. People have said Miz has changed since his issues with Bray Wyatt but last week was just a bad day. Sometimes people want to tell you to smile but he didn’t want to do that last week. He wants to apologize to Kofi Kingston for what he said last week but he has been going through a lot. One of the few bright spots has been the return of an old friend though, so here is the returning John Morrison as his guest.

We get a highlight package of Morrison’s time in WWE and he talks about his big comeback. He was promised new music, a new shirt, a team of pomeranians pulling him to the ring at the Royal Rumble (Morrison: “Small dogs only because there’s only one big dog around here.”), but he’s been doing some thinking. The more he thinks about last week, the more disappointed he is in the fans. Miz had one bad day and the fans say he sucks?

These people don’t know what it’s like to be in the ring but here’s New Day to interrupt. Big E. thinks Miz is such a bad actor that he couldn’t be cast as the back end of a centipede. With that image out of the way, Kofi talks about how Miz should have just said he had a bad day and it would have been so much better. Miz respects Kofi’s six month reign as WWE Champion but not the six seconds it took him to lose the title right back. Kofi says Miz is changing and he sucks….and that’s it in an abrupt ending as we need a commercial.

Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz

Morrison and big E. are on commentary. Feeling out process to start with Kofi dropkicking him into the corner before we go to a far too long look at the commentary table. Miz knees him in the ribs as Morrison asks why Kofi didn’t give Big E. a title shot during his six months as champion. Kofi elbows him in the face as Big E. explains that the team is a brotherhood and they were all World Champion at the same time. A suicide dive takes Miz out but he shoves Kofi into Big E. as we take a break.

Back with Kofi fighting out of a chinlock with Morrison and Big E. off commentary. Miz goes after the knee to cut Kofi off and hits some YES Kicks. The Skull Crushing Finale is blocked and Kofi gets two off the SOS. Miz charges into a kick to the face in the corner but kicks the knee out of the air and slaps on the Figure Four. With that broken up, Morrison dives onto Big E. and the distracted Kofi walks into the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin at 11:29.

Rating: C. You knew the 50/50 booking was coming as soon as this match was announced as we set up a likely Tag Team Title match at the Rumble. That’s a rather interesting match on paper and I can go for cocky Morrison as something for him to do. It’s not like this show is dying for faces as you could argue Otis is one of the top faces on the show at this point.

It’s time for the Firefly Fun House with Bray saying he loves everyone here. That feels special but not everyone is worthy. He means Daniel Bryan because whatever the opposite of what love is is what HE feels about Bryan. Daniel has been naughty lately and he’s in a heap of trouble at the Royal Rumble.

First, the Fiend wanted him to remember, and we get some clips of Bryan’s time in the Wyatt Family, plus his rebellion. Then he wanted to change Bryan, with clips of the haircut. Now that Bryan wants the title, HE wants to destroy Bryan. Bray: “Bye! I love you! Not you Daniel!” I’m as shocked as you are that WWE actually remembered a history between these two from so long ago but it’s rather nice to see for a change.

Here’s Elias for a song. He sings about the Royal Rumble, including about how he’ll win and how much more interesting he is than Brock, mainly because he’s actually here.

Alexa Bliss vs. Mandy Rose

Bliss and Nikki Cross are both in the Rumble. They shove each other to start and Bliss doesn’t like it, earning Rose a slap to the face. Another slap puts Rose on the floor for a baseball slide but Sonya offers a distraction. Cross breaks that up but Mandy gets in a knee to the head for two. They trade kicks to the face and a double clothesline puts them both down. Bliss is up first with Insult To Injury….and here’s Heavy Machinery with the cake. The distraction lets Rose grab a rollup for the pin at 4:02.

Rating: D. What was this supposed to be? They needed to have the freshly face Bliss lose to the distraction rollup here? Right after they announced her as one of the first names in the Rumble? This felt like one of the most standard WWE booking tropes around and it came after a match that seemed to exist to fill time until the finish. I like the Mandy and Otis stuff though, just because of the weird charisma that Otis has.

Mandy smiles at Otis.

Lacey Evans vs. Sasha Banks

Hold on though as Bayley pops up on screen to say Sasha is AWOL tonight and even a jar head like Lacey can understand that. Bayley is here tonight because she has to be so Lacey talks about how she loves to be in the heartland. She wants a title match tonight but Bayley isn’t her kid and won’t be doing what Lacey says. Lacey goes to the back and gets jumped by Bayley, who says put on her mom jeans and go home. Referees break it up.

We recap last week’s main event with the Fiend attacking Daniel Bryan.

Bryan says Fiend wants a lot and Bryan does remember the Wyatt Family. He also remembers outsmarting them and Fiend must not be happy with that. Then Fiend wants him to change so Bryan feels more dangerous. The one thing Fiend can change about him is that he can’t be broken. Ramblin Rabbit pops up on screen behind him and offers to tell Bryan the secret to defeating the Fiend but Bray grabs him and says snitches get snitches. Bryan nods a bit. I need scenes of Bryan trying to meet with Rabbit in secret to get information, preferably in wacky costumes with false identities.

Braun Strowman vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Non-title and Nakamura has Sami Zayn and Cesaro with him. Nakamura avoids a charge in the corner to start and starts striking away but runs into a big boot. Now the running splash in the corner connects but Sami pulls Nakamura to the floor before a second can hit. A distraction lets Nakamura post Strowman and we take a break. Back with Nakamura kicking Strowman down for two and putting on the chinlock.

Another kick to the face looks to set up a middle rope shot to the head, only to have Strowman clothesline him out of the air. The forearm to the chest gets two but Nakamura hits a running dropkick. A running knee to the head connects for two more but Strowman is back with a spinebuster. Cesaro tries to bring in a chair and Nakamura tries to bring in the title but Strowman just powerslams him for the pin at 9:35.

Rating: C. I kind of liked this one and I could go for another one, even though I’m not sure I can imagine Strowman winning the title. That’s his deal: look unstoppable in the build and then get stopped when it matters most. Normally I would say he has to win this time but I’ve said it so many times that I don’t believe it myself anymore.

Post match Strowman holds up the title but Sami runs in and takes it back.

Sheamus calls Shorty G. an example of everything wrong with Smackdown since he left. Small is something to be crushed and disposed of because size does matter. Sheamus wants to embrace chaos.

Bryan finds a present in his locker room. It’s a deformed Ramblin Rabbit, who has had half of his head ripped off.

Here’s Roman Reigns for a chat before the main event. He’s been dealing with King Corbin and his friends so Reigns knew he needed friends. This time he needed more though so he needed family. This is going to be his year and he’s going to win the Royal Rumble so he can move on and main event Wrestlemania for the fifth time. He’ll do it with the Usos by his side.

Cue the Usos to say they have this show on lockdown. Corbin disrespected the family with the dog food but this brings out Corbin and Ziggler to say the three of them are scared. Reigns would love to beat up Corbin twice in one night so they should fight twice at the Rumble. Corbin agrees and is now in the Rumble as well. The Usos hit big dives and the main event is next.

Usos vs. King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler

Jimmy shoulders Ziggler down to start and it’s a double elbow drop for two. Corbin comes in for a clothesline and Jimmy gets caught in the wrong corner. Some right hands in the corner stagger Corbin a bit and a jumping enziguri puts him down. Jimmy goes up but here’s the Revival to distract him, meaning Ziggler can send him into the barricade.

Cue Reigns (Why did he leave?) to beat up the Revival and we take a break. Back with Jey hitting the running hip attack in the corner but diving onto Corbin, who pulls him out of the air. Corbin sends Jey into Reigns so Jimmy superkicks Ziggler to set up the Superfly Splash. Back up and Corbin gets speared down by Reigns for the DQ at 8:55.

Rating: C. You knew someone was going to get disqualified here as the Usos may be back but we can’t have Corbin and Ziggler lose because they’re the major heels. The Usos looked like their old selves and that’s rather good as they’re still one of the best teams in the world. Just find someone more interesting for them to face.

Post match Robert Roode returns and hits the Glorious DDT on Reigns on the floor. The Usos get laid out as well and it’s a spinebuster/elbow drop to put Reigns through the table to end the show. Just in case you weren’t overwhelmed by the levels of boring in Corbin and Ziggler already, now Roode is back.

Overall Rating: D+. Not a very good show here, though again you can see where each of the stories are going and you know what they’re going for in each case. Now that doesn’t mean that they’re very good or interesting, but that’s more about the booking and the way the wrestlers are presented. Tonight we had two distraction finishes, a failed distraction finish and a DQ. That’s not much on a show that included two half hour segment/match portions. There are good parts to the show but the presentation isn’t that interesting and it’s becoming more and more of a problem.

Results

The Miz b. Kofi Kingston – Skull Crushing Finale

Mandy Rose b. Alexa Bliss – Rollup

Braun Strowman b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Running powerslam

King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler b. Usos via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – December 27, 2019: The Spark That Doesn’t Catch

Smackdown
Date: December 27, 2019
Location: Little Caesars Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s the final show of the decade and that means….well probably not much really, as we are in the period just before the build to the Royal Rumble starts up. This time around though we are in for a big match with Daniel Bryan vs. The Miz vs. King Corbin for the #1 contendership to the Universal Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s Elias to sing about how bad things were in 2019, such as Bayley and Shane McMahon. But hey, at least this show doesn’t have the Lana/Bobby Lashley wedding.

Opening sequence.

Daniel Bryan vs. The Miz vs. King Corbin

Hold on though as Corbin needs to brag about his success before Miz can even come out. Miz and Bryan have a lot in common: they’re terrible fathers, they’re former World Champions and they’ve both main evented Wrestlemania. They aren’t doing it again next year though because Corbin is getting the shot and taking down the Fiend.

Miz thinks he’s an action hero but he’s not a real hero in the ring. Cue Roman Reigns as the throne falls over, meaning it’s Reigns taking over on Corbin with a bunch of uppercuts. The Superman Punch off the steps looks to set up the spear but Corbin bails over the barricade instead. No match of course.

Post break, Corbin demands that the triple threat match be postponed.

New Day/Braun Strowman vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Sami Zayn/Cesaro

Cesaro headlocks Kofi to start so it’s off to Nakamura, who is elbowed in the face in a hurry. A clothesline puts him on the floor so Sami grabs Kofi’s foot to take over. Sami actually comes in legally for the first time (well the first time where he does anything) in months. Kofi gets sent outside and Cesaro hits a heck of a running uppercut to knock him over the announcers’ table.

We take a break with Cesaro feigning innocence and come back with Kofi’s hot tag attempt being cut off. Cesaro uppercuts the heck out of him for two and it’s Nakamura coming in for his own spanking abdominal stretch. Strowman grabs Nakamura’s hand but Cesaro makes the save. Kinshasa is countered with the jumping double stomp to the chest and they’re both down. Graves: “Kofi just waffle stomped him in the middle of the ring.” I hope he managed to do the Watusi and watch I Love Lucy too.

The hot tag brings in Strowman and it’s time to clean house, setting up the running shoulders around the ring. Strowman chases Sami but runs right into the jumping knee to the chest from Nakamura. Back in and Strowman blasts Nakamura with a clothesline, only to get caught with a great looking springboard uppercut from Cesaro. Nakamura tries to use the pancake platter but Kofi hits him with it instead, setting up the running powerslam for the pin on Nakamura at 13:32.

Rating: C. Perfectly watchable tag match here and it helps set up Strowman vs. Nakamura, likely for the title at the Rumble. I’m not sure if Strowman is going to win the title, but it’s a different match that we haven’t seen before. New Day still needs opponents, but they’re the perfect placeholder champions for a time like this.

Post match, Strowman dances with New Day. Corey, in the mod deadpan voice ever: “A ‘get these hips’ chant has broken out in the Little Caesars Arena.”

We recap the opening sequence.

Corbin has demanded that the triple threat match be postponed so it’s Miz vs. Bryan in a singles match.

Here’s the dog food segment again.

Sonya Deville is signing some autographs when Mandy Rose comes up to get her for a match. Sonya isn’t interested because Mandy wasn’t there for her last week and storms off. Otis comes in and offers Mandy a homemade fruit cake. He apologizes for the sweat last week but Mandy is cool with it. Otis wants to say something else but Mandy has to leave.

Carmella vs. Mandy Rose

They to to the mat to start but Mandy slips out and hits a running knee. We hit the cross arm choke on Carmella, who is right back up for the slugout. They trade some near falls, including Mandy getting two off a backslide. The O’Connor roll is blocked though and Carmella hits a superkick for the pin at 2:30.

Rating: D+. Carmella’s theme music saying “ain’t got time for this” sums up where about half of the Smackdown women’s division is at this point. These matches are like from back in the old days and while they aren’t that bad, they’re feeling like something that means nothing at all. It’s not a good sign that they could slip back into that reality all over again but it seems to be the case.

Sheamus is still coming back.

Daniel Bryan vs. The Miz

Feeling out process to start with Miz shouldering him down, setting up some staring. Bryan kicks him to the floor but gets backdropped to the apron. They hit stereo crossbodies for a double knockdown….and here are Corbin’s helpers for the double DQ at 3:30.

Post match Miz and Bryan clean house.

Post break Corbin says he’s in on the triple threat, so here are Bryan and Miz to jump him.

It’s time for a Moment of Bliss with Nikki Cross joining Alexa. This week’s guest is Lacey Evans, who did NOT like Sasha Banks insulting her daughter last week. We see a clip of the beatdown and Lacey talks about how that was crossing a line. It brought out Mama Bear and she isn’t happy with the idea of standing out here with her back to the entrance. She’s ready to fight right now so let’s have this match.

Lacey Evans/Dana Brooke vs. Sasha Banks/Bayley

Hold on though as Sasha and Bayley drag (kind of) Dana out here with Sasha calling Lacey a terrible mother and friend. The fight is on and we take a break before the opening bell. Back with Bayley jumping Lacey but getting taken into the corner for the tag off to Brooke. Dana hammers away but gets taken into the corner so Banks can start beating on her as well.

A little taunting brings Lacey in, allowing Dana to get double teamed in the corner. Bayley kicks her down again and Banks gets two off a Meteora. Brooke finally gets in a shot to the face though and the hot tag brings in Lacey to face Bayley. Some knees to the ribs have Bayley down and a picture perfect double jump moonsault gets two as Banks makes the save. The case lets Bayley hit the Bayley to Belly for two but Dana tags herself in. There’s the Woman’s Right to Bayley but the Bank Statement makes Dana tap at 6:35.

Rating: C. The heat on Dana was longer than it needed to be but this keeps Lacey vs. Bayley going and it’s not like Dana can sink any further. I do like the fact that she is now trusted to be in matches like this and she is far from embarrassing herself. Dana is never going to be a star, but she’s improving and that’s what matters most.

Dolph Ziggler hits on Mandy, who still has the fruit cake. He asks about her New Year’s plans and thinks the cake is for him. Some suggestions that everyone has gotten a piece of Otis’ cake makes Ziggler put it down though and he steps on it. Cue Corbin to get Ziggler out of there in a hurry though.

Mustafa Ali talks about how this year didn’t go as well as he was hoping for but 2020 will be better.

Otis is crushed, just like his cake.

The Miz vs. Daniel Bryan vs. King Corbin

The winner gets Wyatt at the Rumble, though Cole calls Bryan the Fiend as we get things started. Miz and Bryan kick away at Corbin to start so he bails to the floor, leaving Miz to roll Bryan up at one. Bryan posts Miz on the floor and hits the big running knee off the apron, only to get sent over the barricade by Corbin (with Bryan seeming to hurt his knee). The chokebreaker drops Miz as well and it’s Corbin completely dominating early on. Back in and the Reality Check drops Corbin, setting up the running corner dropkicks. Corbin runs both of them over though and we take a break.

We come back with Miz and Bryan trading near falls until Miz sends him outside. Miz fires off the kicks to Corbin in the corner, including some to the leg to set up the Figure Four. Bryan comes in with the headbutt for the save and gets two, as Miz looks on in shock for a cool visual. The hold is turned over so Bryan grabs the LeBell Lock on Corbin in a combination you don’t often see.

With that broken up, the End of Days gets two on Miz as Corbin has to make a save. There’s the running knee to Corbin but Ziggler runs in for the superkick to give Corbin two as Reigns makes the save. Reigns knocks Corbin over the barricade and we take another break. We come back with Corbin and Reigns gone, leaving Miz to hit the running corner clothesline.

Bryan gets taken up top and it’s a super shinbreaker (that’s a new one) to work on the knee. A Codebreaker to the knee drops Bryan again and a DDT to the other leg has Bryan in more trouble. Bryan grabs a quick cross armbreaker but Miz bites his hand to break up the LeBell Lock. The running knee is countered into the Skull Crushing Finale for two so Miz goes right back to the Figure Four. That’s reversed as well and Bryan slaps on the LeBell Lock for the tap at 20:18.

Rating: C+. They went with some different stuff here and of course we can’t beat Corbin because the show needs his head or whatever they want to call it. At least they got to the right result and we can move on to the big Fiend vs. Bryan rematch. That being said, oh come on with starting with the triple threat, going to a singles match and then doing a triple threat which turned into a singles. You think they might be overdoing it a bit there?

Post match Bray pops up on screen to say Bryan is about to have all kinds of fun. See, HE isn’t done with Bryan so Bray wants to know if Bryan will let him in. Bryan: “YES!”

Overall Rating: C. There was a bit of a spark to this one and it helped out a good bit. Now what we had other than that wasn’t all that great, but at least they have set up a few things on the way to the Rumble. The problem is more that the characters being presented, outside of Wyatt and Bryan, just aren’t very interesting. The women’s division matches are terrible and I’m not exactly going to get into Mandy and Otis’ oddball potential romance. Corbin and Ziggler aren’t helping things, but there are other problems besides the two of them.

Results

New Day/Braun Strowman b. Sami Zayn/Cesaro/Shinsuke Nakamura – Running powerslam to Nakamura

Carmella b. Mandy Rose – Superkick

Daniel Bryan vs. The Miz went to a double DQ when King Corbin’s throne carriers interfered

Sasha Banks/Bayley b. Dana Brooke/Lacey Evans – Bank Statement to Brooke

Daniel Bryan b. The Miz and King Corbin – LeBell Lock to Miz

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2016 (2017 Redo): They Look Like Softball Teams

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2016
Date: November 20, 2016
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 17,143
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, David Otunga

I say this every year but it’s always hard to believe that it’s been a full year since this show. This was the first time that a Survivor Series was expanded to four hours but thankfully there’s a good chance that they could make it work, mainly due to the elimination matches. The main event though is Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg, which I’m sure will be completely uneventful. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Drew Gulak/Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese vs. Noam Dar/TJ Perkins/Rich Swann

This is a preview match for something called 205 Live, which debuts next week. I know it hasn’t gone great but the division really has evolved into a better place than when it started. Swann gets a nice reaction and then starts with Nese, who gets chopped in the corner. They do their regular flips with Swann’s jump over Nese’s feet getting a good pop (as always) before it’s off to Perkins.

Some suplexes set up an Octopus Hold but Nese reverses into a kind of gutwrench suplex. Gulak comes in and gets caught in the wrong corner with everyone working him over. We actually get a TJ PERKINS chant as he slaps on the kneebar to keep Gulak in trouble. Everything breaks down and we take a break.

Back with Daivari in trouble this time as Dar gets two off a running kick to the face. Nese offers a distraction though and a spinebuster takes Dar down. A superkick gives Daivari two and it’s back to Gulak to crank on the leg. If this sounds rather uninteresting, it’s only because that’s what it is.

Dar dropkicks his way to freedom and the hot tag brings in Swann to very little reaction. A good looking jumping hurricanrana takes Daivari off the middle rope as everything breaks down again. That means we hit the dives but the referee CUTS PERKINS OFF. Now you know that’s not working so Perkins dives over the referee to take out some villains. Back in and Swann’s standing 450 ends Daivari at 11:48.

Rating: C-. I forgot how uninteresting these earlier cruiserweight matches were. The guys barely have characters and the entire story here was “three faces vs. three heels”. It didn’t get much better for a long time but, as usual, the problem comes down to one simple thing: if the smaller guys on the main roster can be big stars and do all these dives, why should I be impressed when cruiserweights can do them too?

Kickoff Show: Luke Harper vs. Kane

Harper is part of the NEW Wyatt Family, which screwed Kane over, meaning we need a match here. Kane grabs a full nelson of all things and we’re in a chinlock fifteen seconds in. That goes nowhere so Harper grabs a headlock as the fans are oddly split here. Kane starts in on the shoulder by sending it into the buckle. Harper sends him outside though and hits that suicide shove of his (Who needs cruiserweights?).

A slingshot flip splash gives Luke two and we take a break. Back with Kane in a chinlock (well duh) but managing to superplex Harper down for a crash. The sidewalk slam gets two but Harper scores with a superkick for the same. Kane’s running DDT and Harper’s Boss Man Slam are good for two more each but it’s the chokeslam to put Harper away at 9:10.

Rating: D+. Well what were you expecting here? This was exactly the match you would have planned out for them and Kane won with his finisher. It’s about as paint by numbers of a power match as you can get and while it wasn’t terrible, it’s also a match I really didn’t need to see.

The opening video looks at Goldberg vs. Lesnar and then all the Raw vs. Smackdown matches. Well at least they got some time. I’m sure Stephanie’s voiceovers had nothing to do with it.

Raw Women’s Team vs. Smackdown Women’s Team

Raw: Bayley, Alicia Fox, Charlotte, Nia Jax, Sasha Banks

Smackdown: Alexa Bliss, Becky Lynch, Carmella, Naomi, Nikki Bella

Entrances alone take forever of course, which will be a theme tonight. Charlotte is Raw Women’s Champion and has Dana Brooke in her corner. Becky is Smackdown Women’s Champion but Nikki is captain. You know, because of course. Bliss gets a heck of a reaction (gee I wonder why). Actually hang on a second as there’s no Nikki. We cut to the back where she’s down after being attacked. Not to worry though, as Smackdown coach Natalya is more than willing to take the spot.

We settle down to Becky and Banks trading rollups before it’s off to Charlotte for more of the same. Becky can’t get the Disarm-Her and it’s off to Nia as things get a lot more difficult. Carmella and Bliss come in for the expected results and Naomi’s high crossbody is pulled out of the air. Natalya actually gets a reaction but Nia clotheslines her head off for her efforts. It’s off to Fox vs. Carmella with Alicia avoiding a Bronco Buster, setting up what looked to be a mostly missed ax kick for the elimination at 6:35. Bliss comes right in, sends Fox into the buckle and adds Twisted Bliss to tie it up at 6:48.

Charlotte and Naomi come in with the latter cleaning house, including knocking Nia outside and hitting a high crossbody to the floor. Nia posts her though and that’s a countout at 8:23. We pause for the Tye Dillinger TEN chant until Bliss takes Banks down and grinds her face into the mat. Banks sends Bliss and Natalya into each other, followed by the double knees in the corner to Alexa. Back up and Bliss saves Natalya from the Bank Statement, allowing Natalya to roll Banks up for the elimination at 10:20.

Charlotte comes in and gets suplexed, meaning we hit the SUPLEX CITY chants. You would think fans would know more chants than that. Charlotte goes up for the moonsault but, as always, Natalya powerbombs her down for two in the near fall that never ends Charlotte. The required Sharpshooter sends Charlotte crawling for the ropes but a big boot ends Natalya at 12:01.

Becky and Bliss get in an argument over who should come in, allowing Jax to suplex them both at the same time. Of course that gets a MAMA MIA from Mauro, which I miss hearing so often. Bliss gets caught in a slam but Becky makes a blind tag and missile dropkicks Bliss in the back to knock her onto Jax. The Disarm-Her actually makes Jax tap at 13:35 and it’s 2-2 with Becky/Bliss vs Charlotte/Bayley.

Jax mauls Becky, leaving Bliss to get big booted down for the elimination at 14:03. Becky fights back as fast as she can with the series of clotheslines into the leg lariat, followed by Bexplex. Bayley has to dive in for a save after a top rope legdrop before coming in for the slugout. Another Bexplex gets two but Bayley’s elbow to the back gets the same. You can tell Becky is getting tired out there so Bayley blocks the Disarm-Her and grabs the Bayley to Belly for the final pin at 17:53.

Rating: C+. The quick eliminations didn’t help things here but the ending was the right call. There was way too much talent on the Raw side to lose and I’m VERY glad it was Natalya, who can wrestle this style without having to dumb things down too much. Becky was pretty much all the blue team had for a lot of the match and she put up a valiant effort, only to be outgunned. That makes her look strong and Bayley getting a win like this is a good thing for her at this stage in her main roster career.

Charlotte takes Bayley out post match and beats her around ringside.

Smackdown mascot James Ellsworth runs into Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows, who weren’t funny in 2016 either. They make some bad chin puns but Raw GM Mick Foley comes in to run them off. Ellsworth talks about all the great memories he has of Foley, most of which involve him being in extreme pain. Foley thanks him anyway and suggests Ellsworth move to Raw. He appreciates the offer but politely turns it down because he’s true blue. Foley leaves and Ellsworth runs into Braun Strowman, who asks if he knows Ellsworth. James runs in a smart move.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Miz is defending and Sami is trying to take the title to Raw. We get the Big Match Intros and Sami gets quite the reaction for being Canadian. Sami spins out of a wristlock to start and Miz looks annoyed in the corner. Miz gets sent outside but Sami has to bail out of the flip dive. The moonsault off the barricade works though, drawing over Maryse for a distraction. Well she can be quite distracting.

This one works well with Miz taking out the knee to get his first advantage. Some hard stomps to the knees have Sami in trouble but he’s still able to clothesline Miz to the floor. A flip dive works as well, followed by a Michinoku Driver for two. Miz’s short DDT gets the same and it’s time for a double breather. The running corner dropkick/clothesline look to set up the ax handle but Sami reverses into the Blue Thunder Bomb.

The Helluva Kick only hits corner though and that means the Figure Four. This one stays on for a good while until Sami makes the ropes, earning himself some YES Kicks. Sami reverses one into a Figure Four of his own but Maryse rings the bell. Since Sami isn’t all that bright, he of course falls for it, only to have Miz roll him up to retain at 14:06.

Rating: C-. Kind of a dull match as you knew a lot of Sami’s near falls weren’t going anywhere. I can go for Miz and Maryse teaming up to steal wins though and it’s a big reason why he’s been an awesome Intercontinental Champion. This would also help play into Sami’s heel turn nearly a year later as he would get tired of losing while playing by the rules. Makes sense, especially in a long term form.

Dean Ambrose and AJ Styles are bickering over being teammates tonight when Shane McMahon comes in and tells them to cool it so Smackdown doesn’t lose again.

Raw Tag Teams vs. Smackdown Tag Teams

Raw: Enzo Amore/Big Cass, Cesaro/Sheamus, Gallows and Anderson, New Day, Shining Stars

Smackdown: American Alpha, Breezango, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Hype Bros, Usos

A fall eliminates both members of a team. Enzo and Cass suck up to the live crowd, as you might expect. New Day and Slater/Rhyno are the respective champions. Fandango tries to give everyone a fashion ticket to start, earning himself a Midnight Hour for the elimination at 44 seconds. New Day spends too much time celebrating though and it’s a superkick from Jimmy to pin Big E. at 1:08.

Gallows comes in to punch Jimmy in the face before handing it off to Cass for the tall power. The fast tags continue as it’s off to Epico vs. Ryder (who is rocking some old school Survivor Series logo trunks) with Mojo coming in for a clap around the ears. Rawley gets taken down into the corner for the huge group beating though as we keep trying to get everyone in. It’s back to Ryder (not Slater like the fans want) but Gallows saves Anderson from the Broski Boot. Instead it’s the Magic Killer to pin Ryder at 5:08.

Gable comes in as Graves talks about how scared he is of American Alpha. It doesn’t seem to be the most valid fear to start though as Epico takes Gable down into a chinlock. Some rolling suplexes have Gable in more trouble and Primo comes in with a springboard ax handle to the ribs. He misses a charge in the corner though and it’s off to Jordan for a quick Steiner Bulldog to get rid of the Stars at 8:08.

The six remaining teams (Enzo/Big Cass, Cesaro/Sheamus, Gallows and Anderson vs. American Alpha, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Usos) come in at once as everything breaks down. That means Enzo gets tossed over the top onto a big pile….which was mainly Raw guys but whatever. Rhyno gets thrown over the top as well, only to have Slater add an even bigger dive. Back in and Cesaro swings Jordan but Gable makes the save with a Rolling Chaos Theory.

Gable isn’t done though as Jordan throws him over the top for a HUGE flip dive onto everyone. Sweet goodness those two were awesome together. I mean, not as awesome as Jordan on his own with Kurt Angle kind of around but still. Back in and it’s a quick Magic Killer to get rid of Jordan at 10:39 as the eliminations are still flying. A spinebuster plants Slater and he’s caught in the wrong corner.

Sheamus won’t tag Cesaro (this was before their ridiculous matching outfits) and an argument breaks out, allowing the hot tag off to Rhyno as everyone bickers. Rhyno comes in and Gores Gallows for an elimination at 12:28. Cass wastes no time with a big boot to Rhyno, followed by the Bada Boom Shaka Lacka for the pin at 12:45.

That leaves us with the Usos….who superkick Enzo down to set up the Superfly Splash and an elimination at 13:26 before I can type the Raw teams. So now we’re down to the Usos vs. Cesaro/Sheamus with the latter hitting the ten forearms (you know the chant) on Jimmy. Cesaro comes in and eats a double superkick but Sheamus Brogue kicks Jimmy with Jey making a diving save.

Super White Noise plants Jimmy again but Jey is right back with a Superfly Splash for two with Cesaro making a save of his own. The hot tag brings in Cesaro for the Uppercut Train and a 619 as the fans lose their minds over Cesaro again. A high crossbody gets two on Jey and it’s time for the Swing. Jimmy breaks up the Sharpshooter and Jey gets the Tequila Sunrise. That’s reversed right back into the Sharpshooter with Sheamus remembering he’s in the match to cut off Jimmy, leaving Jey to tap at 18:55.

Rating: B. This was during the time that I couldn’t stand Sheamus and Cesaro (not a lot has changed in a year) but they did a lot of stuff in this match, despite the crunched timeline. Getting nine eliminations in less than nineteen minutes is a lot but you have to clear the ring out at the beginning. It’s entertaining, but hits a hard ceiling that it’s not getting past.

Stephanie and Foley decide that Sheamus and Cesaro should get a Tag Team Title shot tomorrow night. They recap the rest of the show with Stephanie getting way too serious, as usual.

Preview for TLC with Dean Ambrose vs. AJ Styles in a TLC match for the title.

Cruiserweight Champion Brian Kendrick does his best Sean O’Haire impression and is ready for Kalisto. If Kalisto wins, he brings the division to Smackdown. It’s fine for a one off match but it was really hard to buy Kendrick as the best cruiserweight in the company in 2016.

Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Kendrick is defending and charges straight into a knee to the face. Kalisto is right back with a suicide dive, followed by a springboard corkscrew crossbody for two. Some rollups give Kalisto more near falls and a shotgun dropkick has Kendrick in even more trouble. A rollup into the corner finally gives Kendrick a breather and he crushes Kalisto between the steps and the apron for good measure.

Back in and we hit the cravate to slow things back down. Kalisto manages to fight up and get to the apron where he grabs a C4 out to the floor in the big crash of the match. A good looking suicide dive takes Kendrick down again but he reverses a super Salida Del Sol into the Captain’s Hook. Kalisto finally grabs the ropes and fires off some kicks, followed by the hurricanrana driver. The Salida Del Sol gets two with Kendrick getting to the ropes. Kalisto heads up top….and here’s Baron Corbin for the DQ at 12:21.

Rating: C-. The match was good at times but Kendrick really isn’t the kind of guy you want as a long term champion. It also didn’t help that you knew they weren’t changing up the cruiserweight division so close to 205 Live’s launch. Corbin interfering was fine enough, but it really does make the title match feel like a big waste of time.

The Kickoff Show panel recaps the show so far.

Daniel Bryan yells at Corbin, who doesn’t want little pests running around on Smackdown.

We recap the men’s Survivor Series match, which started in July at the second Brand Split. Naturally this is about the McMahons as Shane and Stephanie are the Commissioners and therefore they have to be fighting. We look at all the entrants as this is treated like the major match is should be treated as. Then Shane is added to the match and that notion kind of falls apart.

Raw Men’s Team vs. Smackdown Men’s Team

Raw: Braun Strowman, Chris Jericho, Kevin Owens, Roman Reigns

Seth Rollins

Smackdown: AJ Styles, Bray Wyatt, Dean Ambrose, Randy Orton, Shane McMahon

AJ and Owens are the World Champions, Reigns is US Champion and Ellsworth is here as the mascot. This is also during the period where Orton is part of the Wyatt Family because we needed that story to get to Orton as World Champion again. Rollins gets a nice reaction and it’s far better without BURN IT DOWN or whatever the line is. AJ and Owens start things off with Styles wasting no time in hitting the drop down into the dropkick.

That’s enough of that though as it’s and they slug it out with AJ getting the better of it. The STUPID IDIOT chants mean it’s time for Jericho, who throws his shirt at AJ and hammers away. Styles dropkicks him down again as the announcers discuss Jericho insulting Undertaker on Twitter. It’s off to Ambrose vs. Rollins, which turns into far more of a wrestling match than it should.

Rollins can’t get a Pedigree so let’s go back to Jericho. Chris yells at Dean for the $15,000 jacket issue, earning himself some really bad armdrags. An enziguri cuts Dean down for two but Ambrose is right back with a bunch of right hands to the head. Shane comes in for the first time and my interest goes down. I’m still not a fan of middle aged Shane and this isn’t likely to change things.

Shane’s bad punches and an armdrag (better than Dean’s) take Jericho down until a dropkick cuts him off. The announcers debate the TV ratings as Reigns comes in and gets booed out of the building. Roman hammers him down in the corner and Seth comes in for a chinlock. That’s broken up so let’s go with Dean vs. Kevin. Owens hits a superkick but gets caught in a hurricanrana, only to have Jericho break up Dirty Deeds.

Everything breaks down and Strowman tags himself in, leaving the fans to chant for Ellsworth. The fight heads outside with Dean being left alone in the ring until Strowman catches his slingshot dive. Strowman walks him around the ring until AJ’s slingshot forearm to the floor breaks it up. Owens dives onto everyone and Strowman tosses Shane across the ring in a pretty good power display.

Some double teaming doesn’t do much to stop Strowman but they manage to knock him outside. That’s enough of Dean and Ambrose working together so they get in a fight, allowing Strowman to hit the running powerslam for the pin on Dean at 15:57. AJ was looking right at the cover and didn’t move. Shane gets to beat on Strowman for a bit but thankfully he gets hammered down as well.

The Phenomenal Forearm is pulled out of the air with AJ being tossed outside in a nasty heap. Orton gets thrown aside too but a stare from Bray stops Strowman in his tracks. Strowman grabs Jericho by the throat but decides to run Bray over instead, followed by a dropkick to put him on the floor. Braun goes outside as well but runs into an RKO onto the announcers’ table. After we pause to see what a random eight year old fan thought of it (he was applauding), Shane drops the top rope elbow to put Strowman through said table. That and Ellsworth grabbing Braun’s foot get Strowman counted out at 21:18.

Strowman catches Ellsworth running up the ramp though (How slow is this guy?) and throws him off the stage through some tables. Everyone else is mostly dead until Jericho covers Shane for two. Owens is fresh enough to drop the backsplash on Shane for two (but only after mocking the dance). There’s the Lionsault but Shane gets two of his own off a small package.

Shane takes a Codebreaker but Orton comes in before the cover, meaning Shane survives another finisher. He avoids a top rope splash though and it’s off to AJ to work on Jericho. With Owens getting in an insult to AJ’s hair (too far man), Jericho counters the Styles Clash into a failed Walls attempt. The Phenomenal Blitz rocks Jericho but Owens comes in with the List of Jericho to blast AJ. That’s a DQ at 29:23, but not before he gives AJ a Pop Up Powerbomb.

Orton gets the tag and comes in with the RKO to get rid of Jericho at 30:19. Notice Reigns blankly staring up at the ramp and not hearing the RKO RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. So it’s down to Shane/AJ/Orton/Wyatt vs. Reigns/Rollins with Orton hammering on Rollins to start. Wyatt and Orton take turns on Seth as Shane is still laid on the apron after his long time in the ring. The superplex takes Rollins down (looks great too) but it allows the hot tag to Reigns. AJ comes in as well and MY GOODNESS the fans do not like Reigns.

House is cleaned with a series of Samoan drops, followed by a great looking Razor’s Edge powerbomb for two on AJ. Seriously that was good enough to cut off the booing. A Pele cuts off a Superman Punch and it’s back to Shane for no logical reason. Shane gets in a tornado DDT to drop Reigns and a clothesline takes Rollins down. Reigns tries a spear but gets awkwardly countered into the post.

In probably the spot of the match, Shane loads up Coast to Coast but gets speared out of the air for a SICK landing. Shane actually kicks out at two but you can see that he is completely gone. Like Lesnar after the botched shooting star gone. The referee says Shane is eliminated at 37:07, presumably due to his brains looking like a pie that has been run over by a bus driven by raccoons.

We pause for a bit as doctors get Shane out of the ring until Roman blasts Bray with a clothesline. Rollins and AJ get stereo hot tags with Seth’s Blockbuster putting Styles down. There’s the slingshot knee to AJ and a suicide dive to Wyatt. With Reigns down on the floor, let’s hit that ROMAN’S SLEEPING chant! Still one of my favorites because the fans just will not give him a break no matter what. An enziguri staggers AJ on top and now it’s WAKE UP ROMAN. Reigns does in fact wake up and saves Rollins from a hanging DDT on the floor.

With Orton down, it seems as good a time as any for a DoubleBomb. Styles makes a save before it can be loaded up but here’s Ambrose to jump Styles again. The fans call Dean a STUPID IDIOT as the former Shield beats up security. NOW the TripleBomb puts AJ through the table, allowing Rollins to get the pin at 47:00. It’s down to two on two with the Wyatts vs. the Shield (not the worst idea in the world)….and here’s Luke Harper for a distraction so the Wyatts can take over.

Reigns posts Orton but Harper superkicks him down, only to have Rollins score with a flip dive to the floor. Back in and the low superkick hits Wyatt but he dives into an RKO, giving Bray the pin at 49:25. Reigns, all alone, sends both of them outside and takes Harper out as a bonus. Back in and Orton eats a spear to save Wyatt, leaving Bray to grab Sister Abigail for the pin at 52:50.

Rating: A. This is a great example of a match that benefits from all of the time it had. What I loved about this was how long it took to take someone out. Most of the people in here were former World Champions and it doesn’t make sense to have them losing in a minute or two like in the other matches. They let the match build up for a change and that’s what makes this feel important.

Above all else though, this felt like someone surviving instead of whoever was left last. Look at the women’s match. Bayley barely looked like she had been through anything at the end. Orton and Wyatt looked banged up, which is how they should after a match like this. It’s a well put together match that got the kind of time it needed, which is exactly how something like this should be. Really strong stuff here with Bray, who actually needed it, getting the win.

We recap Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar. Goldberg was being interviewed about being in WWE2K16 and said he didn’t owe Lesnar a rematch. Lesnar challenged him though and Goldberg wanted his son to see him wrestle. The match was on and it does indeed feel like a battle of two people who could kill each other.

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

We get the full Goldberg entrance, complete with someone knocking on his door. Lesnar drives him into the corner to start but Goldberg shoves him right back down, scaring the heck out of Lesnar in the process. Back up and the spear connects to drop Lesnar again. There’s a second spear, followed by a Jackhammer to give Goldberg the huge upset at 1:25.

Yeah I still don’t like it. Sure it was shocking and a huge moment, but what did this set up? Goldberg eliminating Lesnar from the Rumble, Goldberg getting the most unnecessary Universal Title reign ever, and then a good sub five minute match at Wrestlemania. One of WWE’s biggest issues is giving fans something to cheer for and they give this spot to Goldberg, who they didn’t even create, for the sake of a video game (might not have been their call) and a story that could have made someone’s career. After this, Samoa Joe and Braun Strowman both fell to Lesnar, but Goldberg doesn’t. I don’t buy it, nor to I like it.

Goldberg celebrates with his family to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. One of the major perks about a match running nearly an hour on a three and a half hour show is that it can REALLY bring an overall rating up. Throw in a good women’s match and nothing really bad, this is actually a strong show. It’s far from perfect (main event aside, though that was the only thing that could have closed the show) but it’s a heck of a card, which I can always go for of course. The main issue is they could have gotten this one under three hours so it’s a bit long but nothing too bad. Really solid show though and most of that is due to the mega long match.

Ratings Comparison

Rich Swann/Noam Dar/TJ Perkins vs. Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese/Drew Gulak

Original: C

Redo: C-

Kane vs. Luke Harper

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Women’s Survivor Series Match

Original: C

Redo: C+

Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Tag Team Survivor Series Match

Original: D+

Redo: B

Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Original: C

Redo: C-

Men’s Survivor Series Match

Original: A-

Redo: A

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: B+

My eyebrows went up when I saw the original overall rating. The year of mellowing on the ending have helped a lot as there’s no way this is a B-. Also I really couldn’t stand Sheamus and Cesaro back then.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/11/20/survivor-series-2016-there-are-no-words/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2016 (Original): I Still Don’t Like It

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2016
Date: November 20, 2016
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, David Otunga

Pre-Show: Ariya Daivari/Drew Gulak/Tony Nese vs. TJ Perkins/Rich Swann/Noam Dar

Swann gets out of a suplex to start and dropkicks Nese in the jaw before handing it off to TJ. More flipping ensues and we can hear Renee Young talking to her producer and saying “nine minutes”. The kneebar has Gulak in trouble but everything breaks down to send us to a break.

Pre-Show: Kane vs. Luke Harper

The opening video is pretty standard and focuses on the three elimination tags plus Goldberg vs. Lesnar.

Raw: Bayley, Alicia Fox, Nia Jax, Charlotte, Sasha Banks

Smackdown: Nikki Bella, Natalya, Carmella, Naomi, Becky Lynch

Charlotte destroys Bayley post match to set up the next title feud.

Anderson and Gallows pick on James Ellsworth until Mick Foley comes in for the save. After talking about how much he loved seeing Foley get beaten up as a kid, Ellsworth turns down an offer to come to Raw. Braun Strowman comes up and scares Ellsworth away.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Sami comes right back with a flip dive and the Michinoku Driver for two but Miz starts doing Daniel Bryan stuff again and takes over. That just means a Blue Thunder Bomb to give Sami two but the Helluva Kick only hits the buckle. The Figure Four goes on until Sami turns it over for the counter.

Survivor Series Tag Team Elimination Match: Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Raw: Enzo Amore and Big Cass, New Day, Anderson and Gallows, Shining Stars,

Smackdown: Heath Slater/Rhyno, Breezango, Usos, American Alpha, Hype Bros

Stephanie McMahon and Foley give Cesaro and Sheamus a Tag Team Title match tomorrow night on Raw.

Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Corbin gives Kalisto the End of Days.

Pre-Show recap.

Team Raw Men vs. Team Smackdown Men

Raw: Kevin Owens, Chris Jericho, Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins, Braun Strowman

Smackdown: Shane McMahon, Bray Wyatt, Randy Orton, Dean Ambrose, AJ Styles

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar drives him into the corner to start but Goldberg hits two spears in the first minute. The Jackhammer beats Lesnar in ONE MINUTE THIRTY SEVEN SECONDS!!!

SCREW YOU DEAN AMBROSE, RANDY ORTON, AND ANYONE ELSE THAT LESNAR HAS KILLED BECAUSE GOLDBERG JUST BEAT HIM IN A MINUTE AND A HALF!!!

The show goes off the air before 10:30 with nothing else happening.

Results

Team Raw Women b. Team Smackdown Women – Bayley to Belly to Lynch

The Miz b. Sami Zayn – Rollup

Team Raw Tag Teams b. Team Smackdown Tag Teams – Sharpshooter to Jimmy Uso

Brian Kendrick b. Kalisto via DQ when Baron Corbin interfered

Team Smackdown Men b. Team Raw Men – Sister Abigail to Reigns

Goldberg b. Brock Lesnar – Jackhammer

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – November 8, 2019: We’re In England

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: November 8, 2019
Location: MEN Arena, Manchester England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s an interesting week here as we are over in the United Kingdom (or in Manchester, New Hampshire if you believe WWE.com) for a taped show because WWE hasn’t gone all over the world enough just yet. That means things could get interesting as we see the matches that were supposed to take place last week before everything went nuts. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s NXT invasion.

Opening sequence.

It’s the standard pre-FOX set, with the basic stage and Union Jack flags on the side.

Here’s King Corbin to open things up. He isn’t happy with the NXT invasion from last week but that’s all over now that they’re here. That brings him to Roman Reigns, who he certainly respects. Reigns has main evented four Wrestlemanias and even came back from leukemia in less than a year. I mean, who does that? But what has Reigns done lately? Now Reigns is a family man who spends time making appearances with children.

It’s like the Big Dog now has some little marbles and sounds like a chihuahua. Corbin shows us a computerized dog head on screen with a high pitched bark. So Corbin went through the time, effort and perhaps money to have that made just for the sake of that ten second visual? There’s no Reigns though because he isn’t here yet but he’ll be here tonight for the main event. Then the fans can get out their dog scoop bags to take care of Reigns. Corbin has such a bag with him because THEY GOT IN THAT PROMO DEAN AMBROSE TALKED ABOUT.

New Day is ready to win the Tag Team Titles because they have to keep up with Charlotte. This one is for Xavier Woods.

Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Revival

Revival is defending. Kofi rolls Dawson up for some early near falls and it’s off to Big E. to go after Wilder’s knee. The referee has to check on Wilder and we take an early break. Back with Big E. hitting a belly to belly on Wilder, whose knee is just fine. Kofi comes back in for the dropkicks and the big dive onto both champs. Back in and Dawson avoids Trouble in Paradise, leaving Kofi to get two off the SOS to Wilder.

Big E.’s Rock Bottom out of the corner is broken up and it’s a double hanging DDT to Big E. for no cover. A middle rope uppercut/German suplex combination gives Wilder two but the Shatter Machine is broken up. Dawson gets sent outside and Big E. holds Wilder up for Trouble in Paradise for the pin and the titles at 8:30.

Rating: C+. Well so much for Kofi’s post title loss depression. I’m not sure how much sense it makes to go back to that but if Kofi needs another line on his already Hall of Fame resume, so be it. At this rate he’s already a two time Hall of Famer so it’s hardly a stretch to have him win another title. The match was the usual entertaining stuff between these two.

Sami Zayn comes up to Daniel Bryan in the back and suggests that if Bryan had joined up with he and Shinsuke Nakamura, Bryan would be the new NXT Champion. They need to stick together and Sami should could watch Nakamura’s tag match later and see what can be done.

Heavy Machinery comes out for a match but Imperium jumps them. Some Smackdown guys run out for the save.

Shinsuke Nakamura/Cesaro vs. Ali/Shorty G.

My money is on Da Ali G Show. Bryan comes out to watch as Gable grabs the armbar over the ropes to put Nakamura in early trouble. Cesaro comes in to throw Gable into the corner though, only to have Gable Victory roll his way over to Ali. The big tornado DDT drops Cesaro and everything breaks down.

Gable belly to belly suplexes Nakamura to the floor, followed by Gable and Cesaro joining them. Ali dives onto Cesaro and it’s Gable grabbing the ankle lock. That’s broken up and Nakamura hits Ali with the reverse exploder. Kinshasa is blocked with the superkick but Cesaro sends Gable outside. Now Kinshasa can connect to finish Ali at 4:08.

Rating: C+. They packed a lot of stuff into a short match but it was entertaining. What matters here is the Sami stuff with Bryan, as the attempted manipulation is strong, even if it isn’t likely to work. That makes for a good story as you can see what is going on and there is a possibility that it could work. Not knowing where it is going (though one result is pretty heavily favored) makes it more interesting.

Sasha Banks vs. Nikki Cross

Bayley is on commentary. Banks has a remixed version of her theme song, including some vocals from Snoop Dogg. Cross gets sent into the corner for some early choking to start, followed by more choking on the ropes. The fans sing to Bayley as Cross starts the comeback with some armdrags. Cross goes after Bayley instead though and grabs the headset to shout something I couldn’t understand.

Banks uses the distraction to get in a cheap shot, only to be small packaged for two. Back with Cross fighting out of trouble and hitting a tornado DDT for a double knockdown. Cross’ crossbody misses but she stays out of the Bank Statement. That works for all of a few seconds before Banks locks it in for the tap at 8:39.

Rating: C-. They’ve done a nice job of trying to make Cross into a thing but she hasn’t won anything of note on her own. Having her lose over and over again isn’t a recipe for success but WWE doesn’t seem to see it that way. Granted she has already been more successful than I would have bet on for the main roster, though there seems to be more potential there.

Post match Bayley jumps Cross but Shayna Baszler runs in and lays Bayley out.

Sami tries to convince Bryan to not do the YES Movement again. The lights go out and the Fiend appears for the Mandible Claw on Bryan as Sami runs away.

We look at Tyson Fury defeating Braun Strowman at Crown Jewel.

Here’s hometown boy Tyson Fury to fire up the crown. He has been around the world and fought everywhere, including last week in Saudi Arabia. That brings him to Braun Strowman, who he wants to see right here in front of him. Cue Strowman, with Fury praising him for a great fight and offering a handshake. They shake hands and Fury says they should be a tag team. Strowman likes the idea but doesn’t think anyone is crazy enough to face them. Cue the B Team, with Dallas saying the B stands for fearless. The beatdown doesn’t take long with Strowman running them over and Fury hitting a right hand.

The winners are two of the five entrants on the Smackdown women’s Survivor Series team, joining Sasha Banks. Sonya throws Carmella around to start as we hear that it’s going to be a three team, fifteen woman Survivor Series match. Mandy and Carmella come in with the latter getting stomped in the corner.

The beatdown continues until Carmella runs over and makes the hot tag off to Dana. A lot of screaming ensues with Dana’s cartwheel moonsault getting two. Carmella superkicks Mandy and throws Sonya to the floor so Dana can flip over her. A dropkick into the steps sets up the Swanton to give Dana the pin on Sonya at 4:00.

Rating: D+. As one of the four people in the world who watches Main Event, Dana has grown on me quite a bit over the last year. No she is not great or even very good, but she has improved a lot and looks like she is trying every time she is out there. It’s not her fault that she went from signing to start training in 2013 and was on the main roster less than three years later. She’s slowly getting better, but unfortunately we’ve spent three years laughing at her because she was thrown into the deep end before she could wade into the water.

Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin

Reigns jumps him before the bell and hits a clothesline to the floor. After a quick beating, it’s Corbin coming back inside and hammering away. Reigns hits a big boot but here are Robert Roode and Dolph Ziggler to go after Reigns, because he’s lost the locker room or something. Corbin catches Reigns with Deep Six back inside and we take a break.

Back with Ziggler getting in another cheap shot so Corbin can send Reigns into the barricade. They get back in and slug it out until Corbin hits a chokeslam. Corbin misses a shot off the top though and Reigns hits a running clothesline for two. Ziggler and Roode come in again though and the distraction lets Corbin hit End of Days for the pin at 9:27.

Rating: D+. This really missed for me as Corbin vs. Reigns is boring enough on its own, and then we have Roode and Ziggler, who shouldn’t like Reigns in the first place, attacking him because….he took time off for cancer? It feels like it could be the start of Reigns’ big road to redemption, because that’s a story WWE loves to do. It isn’t the worst thing they could go with, but please find a more interesting way to go about doing so.

Overall Rating: D+. The first half was pretty good but it was downhill in a hurry with the Corbin stuff not doing it any favors. This felt really out of place after last week with Imperium and Baszler being the only invaders, and Imperium is more of a different thing than last week. The previous show felt important and interesting while this one felt like a standard “we’re in England” show. It’s the curse of the schedule again, as I’m assuming they didn’t want to bring all the NXT people over and therefore we have to wait a week to get back to what was a hot angle. We got one week out of it, but WWE fumbled it. Again.

Results

New Day b. Revival – Trouble in Paradise to Dawson

Shinsuke Nakamura/Cesaro b. Ali/Shorty G – Kinshasa to Ali

Sasha Banks b. Nikki Cross – Bank Statement

King Corbin b. Roman Reigns – End of Days

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Crown Jewel 2019: I’ll Admit It

IMG Credit: WWE

Crown Jewel 2019
Date: October 31, 2019
Location: King Fahd International Stadium
Commentators: Corey Graves, Michael Cole

This is one of those things that we just have to get through. The wrestling isn’t the problem here as the action will likely be acceptable enough. The problem is going to be some of the decisions that are made, as WWE tends to lose their minds around here. Couple that with the fact that this is going to be built around part time wrestlers and mainstream athletes. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Battle Royal

Sunil Singh, Mojo Rawley, Erick Rowan, R-Truth, Sin Cara, The Brian Kendrick, Titus O’Neil, Tony Nese, Akira Tozawa, Shelton Benjamin, Apollo Crews, Buddy Murphy, Andrade, Drake Maverick, Eric Young, Luke Harper, Cedric Alexander, Heath Slater, Humberto Carrillo, No Way Jose

The winner gets a US Title shot at AJ Styles on the main show. Thankfully we do get a point made about the 24/7 Title being suspended during the match. It’s the usual brawl to start until Rowan tosses Maverick out first. Rowan gets sent to the apron but holds on to eliminate Slater and Nese.

Harper gets rid of Kendrick and Young, followed by Rawley and Cara going out as well. Crews gets rid of Titus and we take a break. Back with Harper and Rowan having a staredown but Jose recommends dancing. Harper gets in on it before blasting him with the discus lariat. That’s it for Jose, so Tozawa goes after Rowan by asking for a fight. Harper looks down at him and reality sets in, followed by the quick elimination. There goes Crews and Rowan shoves Murphy out as well.

Truth and Andrade follow them out and we’re down to Harper, Rowan, Singh, Carrillo and Alexander. Singh is out as well and we’re down to four. The fans like Harper so he and Rowan get rid of Alexander. Singh goes to leave but Truth steals the pin and the title (because the title was only being protected until Singh was eliminated instead of the whole match). The Mob chases Truth off and the double teaming continues. Carrillo shrugs them off though and gets rid of both monsters for the win at 12:24.

Rating: D+. Keeping these matches short(ish) is the best thing that can be done as they just aren’t going to work very well more often than not. Carrillo winning is perfectly fine and I’m sure the match with Styles is going to be fine. That’s all it needs to be as there aren’t exactly high expectations going into a match like this.

The opening video looks at the main events and little more. It’s a really standard, generic video.

The set does look awesome, as it usually does.

WWE Championship: Brock Lesnar vs. Cain Velasquez

Lesnar is defending and gets a monster pop. Rey Mysterio is here with Velasquez, who does look a little better in ring gear than he has recently (emphasis on a little). They start slowly as Lesnar has learned from what got him in trouble against Cain the first time. Lesnar takes him into the corner for some clinch fighting but Cain gets in a kick to the head to drop the champ. Ground and pound ensues but Brock grabs the Kimura for the win at 2:07.

Post match Lesnar won’t let go so Rey hits him with a chair, earning himself a toss to the floor. Brock chairs Cain down and hits the F5 onto the chair. Rey comes back in with another chair and swings it quite well for someone with one good arm. Enough shots connect to send Lesnar outside and we would have a fresh challenge if the Brand Split didn’t exist. I mean, I’m sure that’s going to last of course, right?

The Revival is ready to be named best in the world.

The Viking Raiders are ready to fight and beat everyone up.

Tag Team Turmoil

Non-title and there are nine teams with the winners getting a big trophy. Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler and the Lucha House Party start things off with Kalisto as the odd man out. Ziggler takes Dorado into the corner to start and hits a dropkick to really take over. Roode comes in and gets caught with the Golden Rewind, allowing the House Party to take over on the arm. A gordbuster gets Roode out of trouble though and Ziggler comes back in for a Fameasser into a crossface of all things.

That’s broken up and Dorado gets up top for a high crossbody to Ziggler, allowing the diving tag (with his head) to bring in Metalik. There’s the rope walk dropkick to Roode and everything breaks down. Roode shoves Dorado off the top into a superkick from Ziggler, followed by another superkick to Metalik. The Glorious DDT gets rid of House Party at 5:45.

Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder are in third and it’s a quick Samoan drop/Blockbuster combination (with Ryder completely missing the Blockbuster part) for two on Roode. Not that it matters as the Zig Zag/spinebuster combination finishes Ryder at 6:53. Heavy Machinery is in fourth and Tucker wrestles Ziggler to the mat without much effort. Roode comes back in and Ziggler hits a cheap shot to take over though and the big guys are in trouble.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Tucker gets taken outside for a ram into the barricade. Back in and Tucker drops Roode, allowing the tag off to Otis to start cleaning house. Otis’ shirt comes off and the jiggling starts fast. Ziggler pulls Roode to the floor before the Caterpillar, so Heavy Machinery settles for the Compactor to get rid of Roode at 13:24.

New Day is in fifth and Big E. starts fast with a battle over an abdominal stretch with Tucker. Big E. manages to stay on his feet while bending backwards and even applauds himself to show off. A double clothesline puts them both down so it’s off to Kofi vs. Otis. Kofi gets knocked down this time and the Caterpillar connects this time, meaning it’s another double tag. Tucker suplexes Big E. for two but misses a middle rope crossbody.

Kofi comes back in and there’s the Midnight Hour to get rid of Heavy Machinery at 17:32. The B Team is in sixth with Axel hitting a quick clothesline to the back of Big E.’s head to take over. Dallas grabs the chinlock but Big E. isn’t having that and pops up for the Big Ending and the elimination at 19:34.

The OC is in eighth but Kofi hits a double stomp on Anderson. Gallows pulls Big E. off the apron though and it’s the Magic Killer to finish New Day at 27:00. The Viking Raiders are the final team and it’s Gallows kneeing Erik in the ribs to start. Erik gets knocked off the apron and a snap suplex gives Gallows two back inside. The chinlock is broken up though and it’s back to Ivar to pick up the pace, including a cartwheel to show off. Erik slams Ivar onto Anderson but Gallows is back in to kick Erik down. The Magic Killer gets the pin at 32:16, marking the Raiders’ first pinfall loss in WWE.

Rating: C-. It wasn’t even that bad of a match but it was a lot of completely average stuff until a stupid ending. You spend two and a half years setting up the Raiders as these unstoppable monsters and then the OC, who weren’t even fresh, just pin them? The OC? Really? As in the team who was ready to leave earlier this year? Really not a fan of this, as the Vikings shouldn’t have lost heading into the hoss fight against the AOP.

We recap Lesnar vs. Velasquez and Mysterio cleaning house after the match.

Rey promises revenge on Lesnar.

Cesaro vs. Mansoor

Cesaro slaps him in the face and Mansoor isn’t having that so he’ll take a wristlock from Cesaro instead. Mansoor knocks him down and gets two off a standing moonsault, followed by the armdrag into the armbar. A dropkick puts Cesaro on the floor and it’s a dropkick through the ropes to keep him down. The dive through the ropes is cut off with an uppercut and it’s Mansoor being sent into the barricade.

Back in and the chinlock is broken up in a hurry so Cesaro pulls him off the middle rope for two instead. Now the chinlock can stay on for a bit and a belly to back suplex gets two more. Cesaro gets dropkicked out of the air though and the comeback is on, including an enziguri. The tornado DDT gives Mansoor two so Cesaro uppercuts him down.

Mansoor is back with a slingshot neckbreaker for another near fall but Cesaro nails Swiss Death into the Crossface. That’s broken up as well and Mansoor hits a superkick for a close two. Cesaro gets ticked off and tries a gutwrench superplex but Mansoor counters into a sunset bomb. A moonsault gives Mansoor the clean pin at 12:38.

Rating: B-. This was actually quite the fun match and Mansoor is more than good enough to hang in a regular match. He isn’t ready for the main roster or anything but being a regular on NXT wouldn’t be out of the question. This was the least surprising result on the show and there’s nothing wrong with that here. Nice match and the fans were WAY into this.

Post match Mansoor talks about waking up and knowing that this was the match of his life. He was nervous but then he came into the stadium and the fans made him ready. Now he cannot wait to see what they do next. He speaks some Arabic and the fans seem rather pleased.

Seth Rollins says the Fiend has taken him to some dark places but a little part of him likes it. No matter what happens tonight, he didn’t start the fight but he’s going to finish it.

Survivor Series will be Raw vs. Smackdown vs. NXT. I’m so thrilled.

We recap Tyson Fury vs. Braun Strowman. Fury was at the premiere of Smackdown and got into it with Strowman. Now they’re having a battle of the sports.

Tyson Fury vs. Braun Strowman

Fury comes out to It’s Your Thing by the Isley Brothers (or at least a cover of it) and is in the traditional Saudi robes. Strowman powers him into the corner to start and there’s the hard shove. Some shots to the body don’t do much to Strowman so Fury nips up (kind of) out of a wristlock. A big boot drops Fury though and reality seems to set in. Strowman hits the post, as usual, and falls to the floor, only to drop Fury with a right hand.

Fury gets some boots up to drop Strowman right back though and it’s a big boot of his own for two (he didn’t seem to know how to cover, though he did hook a leg). Strowman is right back with a sledge to the chest so Fury does the Undertaker sit up. A World’s Strongest Slam plants Fury so he bails to the floor, where Strowman hits the running shoulders. Back in and Fury nails the right hand to knock Strowman off the apron and that’s a countout at 7:59.

Rating: D. Fury tried but this really didn’t work. Other than the big right hand at the end, Fury didn’t show anything of note here, though it’s just not his sport and he’s been training for what, a few weeks at most? Fury wasn’t a disaster or anything, but it was something that felt a lot longer than it was. Strowman losing by countout is a bit of a relief though and I’ll take a small victory where I can.

Post match Strowman hits the running powerslam and Fury pops up to shout at him some more.

We recap R-Truth regaining the 24/7 Title.

Truth runs again but runs into the Singh Brothers, who steal the title back.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Humberto Carrillo

AJ is defending and has the OC, with trophy, in his corner. Styles goes right for him and the fight is on in a hurry with a knee to the ribs taking Carrillo down. A dropkick puts AJ on the floor but he’s ready to avoid the big dive. Back in and AJ hits another knee to set up the chinlock as things settle down a bit. Carrillo gets up again but the springboard armdrag is shoved away.

A brainbuster gives AJ two but Carrillo comes right back with the handspring armdrag and a high crossbody for two. An exchange of jumping kicks to the head leaves them both down and we get a breather. They go the apron with AJ flipping him over the post, only to get caught with a dropkick.

There’s the dive to the floor to drop Styles again and Carrillo grabs a sunset flip for two back inside. The Phenomenal Blitz takes Carrillo down again and the Calf Crusher goes on. Carrillo gets to the ropes and the leg is fine enough for a jumping kick to the head. An attempted moonsault tweaks the knee though and the Phenomenal Forearm retains the title at 12:38.

Rating: C+. The completely acceptable wrestling (for the wrestlers at least) continues in a match without that shocking of a finish. There are a lot of people who could take the title from AJ but you can tell who are just the challengers of the month. It was Alexander last week and now it’s Carrillo. The OC being dominant is a good idea for the short term though as you can have someone knock them off later and wins like this will make that one mean more down the line.

Hulk Hogan dubs Byron Saxton Beautiful Byron before promising to destroy Ric Flair once and for all. Team Hogan has been training day and night with Hogan making them drink sand.

Natalya vs. Lacey Evans

I never thought I would see the day. Natalya is in her regular gear with a t-shirt over it and Lacey is in long pants, a long sleeved shirt and a Lacey shirt. The fans seem rather into this one, second only to the Mansoor match so far. They shake hands to start and Lacey spins out of a wristlock but gets rolled up for two. That gets another round of applause and a second handshake before a headlock takeover puts Lacey down. That’s broken up so Natalya sends Lacey outside and strikes her pose.

Lacey knocks the leg out though and nails the slingshot dropkick, followed by the chinlock. A slingshot elbow gives Lacey two and it’s time to work on the arm. That’s broken up and Lacey takes the belly to back drop into the stepover dropkick. It’s too early for the Sharpshooter so Lacey grabs a suplex to set up the double jump moonsault for two more. Lacey loads it up again but gets pulled off the ropes this time, allowing Natalya to nail the discus lariat. Now the Sharpshooter goes on for the tap at 7:19.

Rating: C. The match was pretty paint by numbers and could have been on any given house show. That’s completely not the point though as this is one of those things that seemed impossible and yet they managed to make it happen. I have no idea if it is going to lead anywhere or make any real difference, but they did something and that’s more than you would have expected possible. Well done and it actually is historic for a change.

Post match we see a bunch of young girls cheering and there is a lot of emotion from both women.

Team Hogan vs. Team Flair

Hogan: Roman Reigns, Shorty G., Ali, Rusev, Ricochet

Flair: Randy Orton, Shinsuke Nakamura, Bobby Lashley, King Corbin, Drew McIntyre

One fall to a finish and Ricochet is in full body gear due to tattoos. Nakamura and Gable start things off with Gable going straight for the ankle but getting kneed down for his efforts. Corbin comes in for a few shots before handing it off to Lashley. Gable gets over for the tag to Rusev and Lashley brings McIntyre in as fast as he can. A spinwheel kick puts McIntyre down and it’s Ali coming in to work on McIntyre’s arm.

McIntyre takes over with the power and shoves him hard onto the apron to really put him in trouble. Orton gets in some shots to the face on the floor and Nakamura/McIntyre add in their own kicks to the ribs. Ali is fine enough to dive over for the hot tag to Ricochet so the pace can pick up. A few rooms of the house are cleaned but Corbin gets in a cheap shot so McIntyre can hit the reverse Alabama slam.

The beating is on, including Corbin’s required chinlock. The chokeslam is countered into a sunset flip to give Ricochet two so Corbin blasts him with a clothesline. Flair busts out the strut to a big reaction but Ricochet gets a boot up in the corner, followed by a spinning kick to Orton’s jaw. The hot tag brings in Reigns to clean house with right hands, clotheslines and a big boot/legdrop to Corbin. Everything breaks down and the RKO is blocked, setting up the Superman Punch for two.

Reigns gets taken to the floor so Rusev makes the save, leaving him to beat up Lashley. That earns Rusev a low bridge but Reigns is back in with a Superman Punch to Lashley. The big dive over the top takes everyone down and another Superman Punch is countered into the RKO for a close two. You don’t see that one kicked out of very often. The Punt is loaded up but Gable grabs the boot. Ali and Ricochet take Orton down and hit stereo dives to the floor. Reigns spears Orton for the pin at 19:49.

Rating: B-. Obvious ending aside (it was only about who was going to get the pin on whom), this was a perfectly enjoyable and at times even good, tag match. I was expecting this to headline the show for the sake of star power but it’s not like Hogan beating Flair was any secret. At least Flair didn’t get physical, which is the best choice for everyone involved.

Team Hogan celebrates.

The announcers talk about Survivor Series.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. the Fiend. Rollins defeated him in the Cell in one of the dumbest things that WWE has done in years and now they’re having a Falls Count Anywhere rematch which can’t be stopped for any reason. On Halloween. With a supernatural character. There is no way they can screw this up, so let’s see how they manage to screw this up.

Universal Title: Seth Rollins vs. The Fiend

Rollins is defending and it’s Falls Count Anywhere. They’re doing the red light deal again too, because that worked so well last time. Fiend is still in his jacket to start and hits Rollins in the throat. A headbutt puts Rollins down and the jacket comes off. The Sling Blade connects but Fiend is right back with the running crossbody. They fight outside with Fiend being sent into an LED screen, followed by the fighting around ringside.

Rollins loads up some tables on top of each other but opts to grab a chair and sledgehammer. Fiend avoids getting his skull caved in and loads up the Arabic announce table. The running backsplash only hits table though and Rollins gets one. Rollins goes up but gets shoved through both tables for the big crash. Fiend takes forever to go over and get him but opts to pull back the floor mats instead.

That of course means a Stomp onto the concrete for no cover as they fight onto a platform. Sister Abigail onto the platform gives Fiend two so they go up to the stage. Another Stomp is no sold so Rollins hits a pair of superkicks. Another two Stomps slow Fiend down and it’s another to keep him down for a few seconds.

There’s another two of them and a series of superkicks sends Wyatt into the tech area for the explosions. Some fire extinguishers are brought out and more pyro goes off, with Rollins getting caught in the eye. Fiend pops up like a monster and grabs the Mandible Claw, setting up Sister Abigail on the floor for the pin and the title at 21:26.

Rating: B-. I’m actually shocked here. They can figure out the Raw/Smackdown situation later but what matters here is they changed the title as they should have here. This should have taken place in the Cell but at least WWE figured out that something needed to be done. It was also a heck of a fight, even if they had the ridiculous spamming of finishers from Rollins. What matters here though is the title change and they got that right, so maybe they’re not completely insane.

The lights go out and come back on so Fiend can pose with the title.

A lot of pyro ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I’ll gladly admit I was wrong about this one as they realized they screwed up in the Cell and switched gears while also delivering a pretty good show. There were a few historical points on the card and nothing was terrible (Fury vs. Strowman was bad but there’s a big asterisk with it), but more importantly it feels like something mattered here, which is one of the biggest problems with this show most of the time. It’s no classic and isn’t worth watching, but they addressed some of the bigger problems and had an entertaining enough show, making this a miracle by comparison to the rest of the shows.

Results

Brock Lesnar b. Cain Velasquez – Kimura

OC won Tag Team Turmoil last eliminating the Viking Raiders

Mansoor b. Cesaro – Moonsault

Tyson Fury b. Braun Strowman via countout

AJ Styles b. Humberto Carrillo – Phenomenal Forearm

Natalya b. Lacey Evans – Sharpshooter

Team Hogan b. Team Flair – Spear to Orton

The Fiend b. Seth Rollins – Sister Abigail onto the floor

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Crown Jewel 2019 Preview

IMG Credit: WWE

I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. I hope I can at least. These things have gone from one of the worst shows of the year to THE worst show of the year, somehow finding new lows to reach. Last year’s Crown Jewel was one of the worst things I can ever remember seeing for a wrestling show and I don’t see this one being a massive improvement. It isn’t about the wrestling content but rather about what kinds of stupid decisions they make and expect us to just accept. This could be a complete nightmare as it tends to be so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Battle Royal

This is one of those ideas that has been around since house shows began because it is something that will always work. The winner gets a shot at the United States Title later in the night so how bad can this be? Above all else, it feels like a bunch of lower level guys getting a chance to get a one off title shot so it isn’t like the winner is going to mean much in the end.

For the sake of simplicity, I’ll go with Cedric Alexander winning, as his feud with AJ Styles is a few months old now and it would make the most sense to go back in time for a match like this. It’s easy, it’s inoffensive and the match will likely wind up being pretty good. Why mess with a formula that works? I mean, very little has worked on this show in the past but at least they might have something with Alexander winning.

US Title: AJ Styles(c) vs. ???

So yeah I think you get the idea here and unless you’re reading this out of order (I’ve heard worse ideas), you know where I’m going with the pick. What matters most here is giving the fans a good match and thankfully Styles is the kind of wrestler who can do that against anyone. There is no reason to rock the boat whatsoever on this one and they would be smart to just do what they have done so many times.

Therefore, just like he has every time, I’ll go with Styles to win and retain over Alexander. I’m sure the match will be fine and likely go about ten minutes, making it pretty much what they do on any given show. Alexander is someone you can easily buy as a viable challenger and his stuff will look good in a major stadium. Now all that you have to do is find a way to bring him back up after choking so many times in his big match.

Natalya vs. Lacey Evans

Just in case you needed more reinforcement in the concept of NEVER SAY NEVER. This is the kind of thing that I never believed could possibly happen and yet here we are. WWE did not announce this one until the day before the show, which sadly may have been to weaken the impact and culture shock that would come with it. It really is a big deal, though we’ll have to see if it is something that keeps going in the future.

I’ll take Natalya for the win here as she is the perfectly safe pick that WWE would love to push here. I know she isn’t the most interesting wrestler in the world and that has been the case for a long time now. On the other hand though, you’re going to get a steady match and that is going to be a better idea than putting Evans out there with someone who doesn’t have enough experience to make something work on the big stage.

Mansoor vs. Cesaro

Yeah we’re doing this again. I get that Mansoor is actually decent in the ring and I’ve liked a few of his appearances in NXT. He isn’t some incredible, can’t miss prospect or really even anything close to it, but he can handle himself in the ring and is someone that can be put out there to give the Saudi Arabian fans something to cheer about, but don’t pretend that he’s anything more than that. What they’re doing here isn’t a secret so let’s just get it over with.

Of course Mansoor wins here because it’s not like he’s around for anything else. Go with what makes sense from this show’s perspective and have Cesaro lose (AGAIN) so Mansoor can get the home country pop. I know it doesn’t mean anything because it’s on one of the Saudi Arabian shows, but they better realize that Cesaro is probably bailing from the company as soon as he can and this is just the latest reason that he’s running.

Tyson Fury vs. Braun Strowman

This would be another example of a match that is only taking place for the sake of the live crowd, because the Saudi Arabian government wants some star power for their money. Fair enough, and Fury has been a heck of a promo when he is given the chance, but this has a chance to be a serious disaster. Strowman isn’t the most graceful wrestler in the world and he hasn’t even been wrestling for that long, but now he’s supposed to be able to walk Fury through a match? In these conditions? That’s how this is supposed to work?

I’ll go with Strowman here, but I have a really bad feeling that it is going to go to Fury for the sake of the surprise. That being said, even if Strowman loses, does it matter? Last year’s match against Brock Lesnar at this same show is about as bad of a result as he could have had and now we’re just stuck waiting on him to do anything else because for some reason WWE doesn’t think that someone tripping at the goal line every time will ever hurt him. Strowman wins, but I have very little confidence in either the pick or his future.

Team Hogan vs. Team Flair

Here’s your legends match, as we are really supposed to pretend that Hulk Hogan vs. Ric Flair was ever a rivalry between two sides that were even close to equal. This feud has been dusted off in the WWF, WCW, Impact and now WWE again, plus on Hogan’s own tour of Australia. How we’re still doing this is beyond me, but at least this time there will be some other wrestlers there to share some of the spotlight. I mean, like 3% of it but it’s better than nothing.

Of course Team Hogan gets the nod here, as there is no reason for them not to. This is the kind of match that is designed for the legendary face to win while Flair, who has been bragging about being cleared to take a bump (because he’s nuts and no one will be sane and tell him no) gets to lose and kick his feet again, because that’s how this rivalry (and I use that term loosely) has gone for about twenty five years now. Hogan’s team wins, because that’s what he does when he faces anything associated with Flair.

Tag Team Turmoil

If there is one match that shows you how divorced from reality this series of shows really is, it’s this one. You have a rather ridiculous nine teams in one match, including both Tag Team Champions, and the prize is the title of BEST TEAM IN THE WORLD. Now one would think that would just be Revival vs. Viking Raiders, but why do that when you can do it MUCH FREAKING BIGGER???

Just for the sake of making my head hurt, I’ll go with New Day here, because they lost on SmackDown but since that doesn’t matter, they’ll win here and then not win the titles in their match on Friday. It makes the least sense possible from a narrative perspective so I find it to be the most likely outcome. This is probably going to get a lot more time than it needs, which tends to be the case with a lot of gauntlet style matches these days.

WWE Championship: Brock Lesnar(c) vs. Cain Velasquez

I’m not sure what to say here as I get the concept, but it isn’t something that gets me overly interested. Normally I would say that there is no chance Velasquez wins, but at the same time we’re going to be seeing a women’s match in Saudi Arabia so that line of thinking isn’t quite viable. It’s been about nine years since Velasquez mauled Lesnar for the UFC Heavyweight Title and Lesnar is out for revenge, while Velasquez is fighting for Rey Mysterio and Dominick, both of whom were injured at Lesnar’s hands.

I’m going to go with what makes sense here and pick Lesnar, but I have this feeling in my gut (which is almost never right) that they might give it to Velasquez. The biggest problem I see with that though is what in the world they could do with Velasquez, who has wrestled less than three career matches, after that. I’ll take Lesnar here, but a freaky ending that sets up a WrestleMania rematch wouldn’t shock me.

Universal Title: Seth Rollins(c) vs. The Fiend

And then….this. It takes a lot to actually make me annoyed about a wrestling show but their first match did the trick. For reasons that only WWE could explain to you, they felt the need to not only put their hottest act in the Cell, but have him lose in the least intimidating way possible. It was booed out of the building and WWE hasn’t been the same since that took place. Now it’s the rematch and the question is how can they mess this up again?

I’ll go with Rollins here, because it’s the dumbest thing that they could do. Fiend is in trouble after everything that has happened to him as of late and the best thing possible for him would be to no sell the Stomp and win this in about two minutes. WWE loves having the title on Rollins too much for that to happen though, so Rollins retains here and WWE gets to spend even longer trying to figure out why their audience is shrinking and why the Fiend keeps getting weaker reactions.

Overall Thoughts

Does anyone actually want to watch this show? The entire series has become a nightmare for WWE fans, though I’m sure the company doesn’t mind due to the crazy checks they receive for them. The wrestling has rarely been the problem here, but there is a real chance that we are going to be in for some of the worst booking decisions of the year, because WWE either thinks that no one pays attention or that they’re brilliant enough to get themselves out of it. I doubt it can be worse than last time, but remember: never say never.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6