Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Chloe x Hallie

I’m not sure if it’s because I was in the stadium last year or something else, but this show was actually a bit more memorable than the previous few editions. Hopefully it’s just as good watching it back but you never can tell with these things. Brock Lesnar is defending the Universal Title against Roman Reigns in the main event because of course he is so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

JR and Jerry Lawler come out for commentary with Byron Saxton for a bit of a feel good moment. It’s a brawl to start with English getting backdropped out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Anderson dumps Konnor and Ziggler starts his tradition of hanging on to avoid elimination. There goes Hawkins as we still need to clear out a lot of the ring. Former partners R-Truth and Goldust shake hands with Goldust eliminating him, cutting off JR’s Bearcat Wright’s references.

Primo is out next as there’s almost nothing between these eliminations. Kanellis gets tossed and Ziggler hangs on again. Things settle down a bit unto Apollo knees Breeze as JR mocks Ziggler for always having to save himself. Viktor is gone too and the Revival beats on Ryder but he’s right back up. The Broski Boot is loaded up on Ziggler (JR: “Ziggler in trouble. Again.”) but Rawley Pounces Ryder out in a nice touch. A Liger kick from Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows as we take a break.

Apollo getting backdropped out and Benjamin follows him…and let’s look at the announcers. We come back with Rhyno and the Revival gone and Kane eliminating Axel and Dallas. And now, we look at John Cena in the crowd as a fan, because I had forgotten about that stupid story. Back with Sin Cara eliminated by Corbin and Fandango dancing at Kane, earning himself an elimination off a single uppercut.

Corbin gets rid of Slater and Kane eliminates Gable, leaving us with the big power showdown. Everyone else jumps the monsters and it’s a superkick to Titus, setting a clothesline to get rid of him. We’re down to Corbin, Dillinger, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Hardy and Kane as Goldust loads up Shattered Dreams on Dillinger. That’s broken up by Ziggler so Goldust ties him up for Shattered Dreams as well. Dillinger takes the kick but Ziggler eliminates Goldust.

That leaves us with a TEN vs. DELETE battle with a Twist of Fate and Dillinger is gone. Kane tosses Ziggler but gets eliminated by Corbin to get us down to Corbin, Hardy and Rawley. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the villains go for the elimination….but here’s the returning Bray Wyatt for Sister Abigail into an elimination for Rawley. Corbin drops Wyatt but gets backdropped out to give Matt the win at 16:36.

Rating: D+. It was a battle royal that got a lot of time and wasn’t all that interesting. The ending was a cool moment and it’s the best way to get everyone on the card, even if most of these people mean a grand total of nothing. It’s not a good match or even anything memorable, but at least it got the crowd warmed up….with an hour to go before the show itself starts.

Post match Matt thanks Bray and we get a hug, which JR deems a Wrestlemania moment.

Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

Tournament final to crown a new champion after Enzo Amore was finally banished. Ali debuts his SubZero look, which he still uses a year later. They’re both very happy to be there and slaps hands before getting started. Cedric scores with a shoulder block but gets headscissored down as the announcers are right there to play up the power vs. speed idea, though you don’t exactly think of power when it comes to Alexander.

Now the 054 connects for two, the first time the move has ever only gotten a near fall. Another 054 misses and it’s a pair of spinning back elbows to Ali’s face. A third turns Ali inside out and the Lumbar Check makes Cedric champion at 12:21. Cedric immediately hugs the unconscious Ali in a nice show of sportsmanship.

Rating: B. I was pulling for Ali but it felt like a title match between two guys fighting with everything they had. Cedric was the favorite in the entire tournament but Ali came off looking like a star the whole way through. This was rather good stuff and should have been the Kickoff Show main event, though I’ll take a good match when I can.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Dana Brooke, Becky Lynch, Sarah Logan, Lana, Bianca Belair, Naomi, Sonya Deville, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Peyton Royce, Natalya, Dakota Kai, Mickie James, Taynara Conti, Ruby Riott, Kairi Sane, Sasha Banks, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Bayley

This was going to be the Fabulous Moolah Memorial Battle Royal but history intervened and it’s just a regular battle royal this time around. Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary and the former has some advice: don’t get thrown over the top rope. Becky comes out first, everyone else comes out, followed by Sasha and Bayley to fill out the field. Miss Money in the Bank Carmella (erg) poses with the briefcase to start and everyone gangs up on her for the easy elimination.

Deville, who got the elimination, poses in the big circle of women but Dana gets thrown in the middle instead. That means trash talk from Brooke and the big beatdown is on with Mandy tossing Dana. The NXT women team up to send the main roster women outside (through the ropes rather than over, which I can’t stand in battle royals) so we can get the WE ARE NXT pose.

Becky yells at Devi about orange being HER COLOR as some of the main roster women get back in. Kai eliminates Mandy as Paige declares Deville her favorite member of Absolution. We stop for the NXT women to triple team Deville, setting up Belair’s 450, because THAT MAKES SENSE IN A BATTLE ROYAL! Deville is out and we take a break, coming back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow thanks to more ganging up on Riott during the break.

Lana and Devi are tossed and Conti gets kicked out by the Squad. Becky and Belair have a less than thrilling slugout and the hair whip is incredibly loud. Belair misses a charge though and gets kicked out, followed by Kai kicking Naomi in the face. Banks gets rid of Kai without much effort and there goes Becky to a chorus of boos (I think Becky will be fine). Ruby knocks Mickie out and it’s Royce’s turn to kick people in the face.

Logan powerbombs her out as well though and we’re down to Morgan, Logan, Riott, Bayley, Banks, Natalya and Naomi, who is out on the floor (oh dear). For some reason Natalya decides to pose with her back turned to the Squad but manages to suplex Ruby and Sarah at the same time.

Bayley saves Sasha from a suplex and helps get rid of Natalya. Morgan is out as well and there goes Ruby. Banks sends Logan to the apron and Bayley knocks her out, leaving us with Banks and Bayley. The fans actually get on their feet to cheer for this one and the handshake…lets Bayley throw Banks out to a big reaction but Naomi gets back in for the Rear View. That’s enough for the win at 9:39.

Rating: F+. I had forgotten how annoying that ending was but it makes you realize just how stupid this whole thing was. Bayley and Banks would go on to have their weird semi-feud and then partnership over the year while Naomi has done NOTHING important since this match. You have something here with Bayley and the bright idea is to do the HAHA WE TRICKED YOU ending? That’s been done to death in battle royals and it’s not like this was anything more than a surprise ending, which was really stupid given how Bayley had been searching for anything important for the last year. This actually ticked me off again so well done.

Jojo introduces Chloe and Hallie to sing America the Beautiful, describing them as the “future of music”. Well if Jojo says it then it must be true.

The opening video shows shots of parties in New Orleans and, just like in 2014, features a tagline of Let The Good Times Roll. They couldn’t come up with anything else in four years? And the theme song is still Celebrate by Kid Rock. Ok it’s a catchy song, but is there nothing else (or no one else) that they could use?

Yay pyro! And cool set with the Mardi Gras mask, which looked awesome all night long.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the lower bowl and looking not quite directly at the far post on the right side opposite the hard camera.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and we get the new idea this year: 3D graphics for some of the entrances, including Miz who gets the Miz logo and various words to describe him, including MOVIE STAR. Miz sends the Miztourage to the back because he wants to do this himself for his newborn daughter. The weird part is you couldn’t see those in the stadium (obviously) but you could see them on the screens around the building, which made your head snap around a few times.

Balor isn’t the Demon here, but instead comes out with a bunch of LGBT people in rainbow Balor Club shirts labeled FOR EVERYONE. If nothing else, it’s awesome to see the stadium doing the Balor pose at once. This was set up with both guys beating Miz in one night, because Balor beating Miz after Miz had a long match with Rollins is totally the same thing.

They all go for the way too early rollups to start with Miz being sent outside. That means Rollins can miss a Stomp on Balor but a superkick to the ribs works just fine. Balor sends Rollins outside though and it’s the big running flip dive onto both of them for the first major pop of the night. Back in and basement dropkick gives Balor two on Miz but Rollins is back in with a high crossbody.

Miz finally gets to do something other than get beaten up as we look at Cena in the crowd again. Rollins grabs a double Blockbuster for two on Miz but he’s right back up with a knee to the ribs (not face Cole). The chinlock goes on, which shouldn’t be the case less than four minutes into a triple threat. Back up and a neckbreaker gets two on Miz as they’re just trading moves until we get to the big stuff. Another chinlock seems to annoy Balor so he gets up again and hits the double stomp to Miz’s ribs.

Rollins is back in for a Sling Blade to Balor, setting up a suicide dive to Balor and Miz. A superkick drops Balor again but Miz comes in with a DDT for two. Miz goes with the strategy by bending Balor’s knee around the ropes and slapping on the Figure Four. The frog splash from Rollins (from out of nowhere for an awesome visual) breaks it up and all three of them head outside.

Balor escapes the barricade powerbomb and dropkicks them both into the barricade instead. Back in again and 1916 gets two on Rollins but Miz breaks up the Coup de Grace. Instead of the Tower of Doom though it’s the buckle bomb to Miz and a superplex into the Falcon Arrow to Balor. The Skull Crushing Finale gives Miz two on Rollins and they’re all down again.

Balor does his hop over the ropes in the corner but gets crotched for trying the Coup de Grace again. It’s just not working this time dude. Miz goes up top with Balor and catches a springboarding Rollins with something close to a super Skull Crushing Finale. Balor breaks it up with a Coup de Grace and hits a second on Miz but the Stomp breaks that up too. Another Stomp hits Miz to give Rollins the pin and the title at 15:37.

Rating: B-. This might have been a few minutes too long but Rollins winning was a fine call as he’s more than over enough and kind of fits the Workrate Champion idea to perfection. Miz can come back and break the all time days record later and Balor is over no matter what. Not a great match, but a very hot opener and the fans were into everything here.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match, which is billed as the BIGGEST WOMEN’S MATCH IN WRESTLEMANIA HISTORY. My how times change. Anyway Charlotte is the queen of everything and Asuka won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot. It’s absolutely a dream match with Charlotte being Charlotte and Asuka still being undefeated.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and gets the full Ric Flair theme song, complete with a HHH from Wrestlemania XXX inspired entrance, meaning soldiers to help her off a throne and take her robe. Asuka on the other hand gets the CGI masks with rainbow colored lines surrounding them, which look cool on screen but live….not so much. They lock up to start and take turns flipping out of wristlocks for an early standoff.

Charlotte loads up a monkey flip but instead trips the leg for a failed Figure Eight attempt. You can feel the intensity here and it’s working well so far. Some chops to the chest (and one to the face) have Asuka in trouble but she’s right back with a hip attack to knock Charlotte outside. Back in and it’s time to start in on the arm but Charlotte gets in a backbreaker into an STO. Charlotte uses a Backpack Stunner to get out of a sleeper and a knee to the back of the head keeps Asuka in trouble.

It’s enough trouble for Charlotte to go up top for the moonsault….which is countered into a triangle for a sweet escape. Charlotte reverses into a Boston crab until Asuka makes the rope. A sliding kick to the face knocks Charlotte backwards and it’s back to the arm as Asuka continues to follow her game plan. They head to the apron with Asuka suplexing her out to the floor in a good looking crash. Sometimes you need to just go with a big spot like that and it worked very well.

Back in and they stare each other down until Asuka just erupts with strikes to the face. A missile dropkick gets two and Asuka stomps on the back. Charlotte is fine enough for the chops to catch Asuka on top and it’s a super Spanish Fly for two with the fans getting much more into things in a hurry. Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold from Asuka’s back for a cool change of pace.

Charlotte tries to flip out and into the Figure Eight but Asuka kicks her in the head for a block. Well that’s certainly to the point. The Asuka Lock is blocked and Charlotte hits a very good spear for two more as the fans are WAY into this. With nothing else working, Charlotte goes to the Figure Eight and bridges up with one arm….and Asuka taps at 13:05 in a shocker.

Rating: A-. I don’t get shocked by results very often but I was actually stunned to see how this went. I would have bet money on Asuka walking out as champion here but Charlotte winning was far from a ridiculous result. Now the problem is what this did to Asuka, as she only started to recover from the loss nearly a year later. Charlotte would lose the title to Carmella two days later, bringing some dark days to the belt. This however was anything but dark, with an outstanding match between two stars.

Post match Asuka gets the mic and says Charlotte was ready for her in the ultimate sign of respect.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something that makes him get out of his seat and run up the ramp. You really couldn’t wait until the women were gone so they could have the full moment?

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Orton is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Aiden English (now bald, meaning he shaved his head since the end of the battle royal when he had hair) handles Rusev’s entrance and we get my favorite shot every year: a closeup of someone with the camera swinging around to show the stadium crowd in front of them. There’s something so cool about seeing just how big of a stage they’re really on. Anyway, Rusev is crazy over and easily the crowd favorite. Does anyone else see an issue with Orton’s music saying “I hear voices in my head” while his Titantron says IN MY VEINS?

While you think about that, Orton and Mahal are sent outside, leaving Rusev to dropkick (yes dropkick) Roode to the floor. A RUSEV DAY Cannonball off the apron takes Orton and Mahal down again but Roode is back in with a Blockbuster for two on Rusev. The other two get back in and it’s Mahal getting beaten up by Orton and Roode before being tossed right back to the floor. Orton hits the top rope superplex on Roode with Rusev and Mahal diving back in for the save.

That’s enough for Mahal to ask Rusev for a partnership but Rusev doesn’t even bother waiting before hitting Mahal with a spinning belly to back suplex for two. Roode makes it worse by busting Mahal’s spine and hitting the GLORIOUS pose, only to have Orton make a save this time.

That leaves Orton alone in the ring and it’s the hanging DDT on Rusev. The RKO hits English, Rusev and Mahal so it’s Roode making a save of his own. Roode blocks the RKO and plants Orton with the Glorious DDT as Mahal saves. The Machka Kick drops Mahal but Sunil Singh offers a distraction, letting Mahal hit the Khallas for the pin on Rusev at 8:14. You could literally feel the energy go out of the crowd.

Rating: D+. There was some hard work in there but this was the definition of Vince saying screw the audience because it’s all about what I want. Rusev was one of the most popular guys in the company and had been for months but instead we get Mahal, who was an all time bomb as WWE Champion getting to pin Rusev.

It’s not like there was even a long term plan as Mahal would lose the title a mere eight days later. Rusev would indeed get the title nearly nine months later, after his popularity had fallen way down, meaning it was acceptable to give the fans what they want. This really hurt the show and it’s going to be hard to recover.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon and yeah I think this might help the recovery process. After being at Wrestlemania XXXI and attacking Stephanie, Rousey made her official WWE debut at the Royal Rumble earlier in the year. She wanted to go to Wrestlemania and since she was (at the time) the most dominant female UFC fighter of all time, Stephanie wanted to mold her into a WWE star.

Angle, who had been screwed over by Stephanie and HHH before, warned Ronda that they would mess with her too. That didn’t sit well with Rousey, who beat both of them up on the way to this mixed tag match. Naturally we got a lot of Stephanie workout videos because she’s STEPHANIE and that makes her some wrestling legend. It’s sickening, and I was waiting on her to survive the armbar in the match. It was clear that this was going to be full of smoke and mirrors, but the question is how well Rousey is going to do in her debut. This is one of the main events of the show and something a lot of people really wanted to see.

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles (flanked by four women on their own motorcycles), with Stephanie’s biker look (including the leather pants) making me a lot less annoyed at her. Cole: “Even though Stephanie is a former Women’s Champion, this is her Wrestlemania in-ring debut!” WWE pretending that Stephanie was a wrestler is one of their more interesting character tweaks. Rousey gets a huge reaction and of course smiles at the crowd, as is her custom. Cole talks about two people starting in UFC and coming to WWE: Ken Shamrock and now Rousey. So they’re not Dan Severn fans either?

The fans are WAY behind Rousey as they stare each other down in the middle. Stephanie shoves Rousey in the face because Stephanie just never learns. A hair pull doesn’t prove to be the brightest idea either so Stephanie bails to the apron so the guys can start us off. Angle (very badly) punches at HHH and the beating is on in the corner. A hammerlock keeps HHH does as we’re just waiting for this to explode as it should be doing.

Stephanie manages to lure Rousey in though and Angle gets low bridged to the floor. Cole calls this “that McMahon instinct” as the worship is already a lot to take. Angle gets sent into the steps and Rousey is about to lose it because she can’t intervene. Some more cheap shots from Stephanie keep Rousey angry and a spinebuster gives HHH two. A front facelock keeps Angle down but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Stephanie chokes Angle and HHH nearly hits her by mistake but it’s still too early for the hot tag. A suplex drops HHH again but Stephanie runs around and pulls Rousey off the apron. HHH gets whipped over the corner for the real crash and you can see the panic in Stephanie. The hot tag brings in Rousey (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!!!”) who SPRINTS over to Stephanie and throws her down with a suplex. After the required tug of the shorts, Rousey unloads with rights and lefts in the corner as the fans are already losing it. The release throw sends Stephanie back into the corner and Graves is terrified.

The fans want and receive the armbar….but Stephanie blocks it. Yes the hold that UFC fighters were powerless again is a simple block for Stephanie as the crowd’s soul is slapped down again. Stephanie blocks it a second time and rakes the eyes (Cole: “Complete manipulation of the rules!” Ignore the complete manipulation of reality and focus on those rules man.”), setting up a double arm crank as the fans try to process that they’re really doing this.

Stephanie even mocks Rousey, who grabs her by the throat and hits the swinging Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee. Rousey: “I’m going to continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls her out as well, apparently not a fan of such chatty opponents. Angle is back up and sends HHH over the announcers’ table but gets thrown onto the Spanish table. After a slow crawl, HHH is back in and sees Rousey, who is ready to fight. HHH puts the referee in the corner and sizes Rousey up and the beating is on in the corner.

A legsweep looks to set up the swinging Samoan drop but Stephanie makes a save. I know I’m not a big HHH fan a lot of the time but he just made Rousey look like the biggest star in the history of the division. Rousey chases Stephanie outside though and has to adjust the gear again, allowing Stephanie to post her. Angle is back in for some belly to belly suplexes and the rolling Germans but the ankle lock is countered. The Pedigree is countered as well and HHH gets catapulted into the corner, setting up the Angle Slam for two with no one making a save.

Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock and yells at Angle, who catches the boot to the ribs. HHH has to save his wife and Pedigrees Angle for two with Rousey making her own save this time. With Angle down, HHH loads Rousey up for a powerbomb but gets hurricanranaed (!) into the armbar on HHH (I completely bought that as the finish live) until Stephanie grabs a choke.

That’s reversed into an armbar and Stephanie has the gall to block it AGAIN. Angle ankle locks HHH, who rolls Angle into Rousey for the real save. Rousey and Angle get posted and it’s time for stereo Pedigrees, both of which are broken up. The armbar is slapped on again and this time Rousey uses the leverage to pull back and Stephanie finally taps at 20:37.

Rating: A. That’s not even on a sliding scale because Rousey knocked that out harder than she knocked out Alexis Davis. She looked like she’s been doing this for ten years and had one of the best debut matches I’ve ever seen. Everyone else was nailing it too and I got completely sucked into it both live and watching it back because all of the stuff was that good. Don’t have Stephanie block the armbar so often and this is an A+ easy.

That was the only downgrade, even though you knew full well it was coming. To be fair though, Stephanie did tap out clean in the end so it wasn’t the most ridiculous thing ever. Well the first part was but not the finish. After this, how can you now see Rousey as the star that she already was?

Stephanie has to be helped out, as she should. She would get armbarred again the next night for a bonus.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Kofi wastes no time in hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jey but Harper pulls him outside before the count. Jimmy gets sent into the steps and Harper crashes against Big E. against the barricade. With no one else to beat up, Woods gets powerbombed against the post, leaving Rowan to splash Kofi and Jey back inside. The mostly done Jey is thrown outside and Big E. gets knocked off the apron. Jimmy comes back in for a pair of superkicks and Jey is back up for stereo kicks to Harper’s head in the corner.

A jumping enziguri hits Harper and a superkick knocks Rowan to the floor, setting up a double suplex on the outside. Harper catches Kofi with a swinging release Boss Man Slam but gets caught with a double superkick on top. Rowan breaks up the Tower of Doom so Kofi charges at Harper, only to get powerbombed by Rowan. An assisted super sitout powerbomb finishes Kofi to give Harper and Rowan the titles at 5:55.

Rating: C-. The time cuts aside, this wasn’t the worst match in the world with the Usos and the New Day giving it all they had against the monsters but not being able to stop them. The Bludgeon Brothers were the first time a team other than the Usos or New Day had held the belts in over a year so this was long, long overdue and the right call.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network, most of which actually happened for a change.

Here’s a fired up John Cena for his match with Undertaker. This comes after weeks of Cena calling out Undertaker for Wrestlemania because Undertaker seemingly retired after last year’s show. Cena came off as the biggest jerk in this feud and acting like Undertaker owed him something. There was no confirmation that Undertaker was going to be here, hence him sitting in the crowd earlier.

That’s the other stupid part of the whole thing: Cena kept talking about how he had no path to Wrestlemania, because JOHN CENA couldn’t get a match. He gave some lame excuse about how this was the only match that mattered and it didn’t do a thing to make up for the consistently annoying lines from commentary about Cena possibly being left out of Wrestlemania. I get what they were going for, but come on already.

Anyway Cena is ready to go but here’s a referee to say not so fast. Cena is disappointed and the lights go out. It’s only Elias though and Cena heads back to his seat as Elias sings about it being his night. That’s enough for Cena who runs in and beats Elias up before looking disappointed again. Cole: “I guess that would be a Wrestlemania moment right?” He goes up the ramp but stops….and the lights go out again. A spotlight hits the ring with Undertaker’s hat, coat and boots, which are hit by lighting (looks awful on the Network, looked great when you didn’t see it coming in the stadium. They’re gone, and the gong strikes.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

I know he’s been old for ten years, but that entrance live, especially in the stadium, is chilling. Cole of course can’t SHUT UP, saying everything he can think of, including calling them the two greatest performers of all time. Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner to start and hits the jumping clothesline. Old School connects and Undertaker hits some running clotheslines in the corner. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the big leg have Cena rocked but the chokeslam is escaped.

Cena’s belly to back connects but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, making Cena fall down in fear. The chokeslam into the Tombstone finishes Cena at 2:48. The more I think of this one, the more I like it. Cena ran his mouth for so long and Undertaker annihilated him here, just as he should have. While a lot of people will be annoyed at not getting a full form match between these two, I’d rather they do this than have Undertaker look back in a fifteen minute match.

Video on the Hall of Fame ceremony.

Here’s the Hall of Fame Class, which really doesn’t need to air on the show. They already get a whole evening to themselves. Do we really need ten minutes on Wrestlemania too?

Jeff Jarrett (eh sure, though it’s still weird to see him here)

Mark Henry (still not sure on him, though his documentary was great)

Hillbilly Jim (I’m a Kentucky boy but come on)

Ivory (she looks better now than she did during her career)

Jarius JJ Robertson (Warrior Award)

Dudley Boyz (yep)

Goldberg (yep, though I’d call the Dudleys more appropriate headliners)

Oh and Kid Rock, this year’s celebrity inductee, wasn’t there because he had a concert.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens. Bryan somehow overcame his injuries and returned to the ring in something I still can barely believe. Owens and Zayn had tormented Smackdown boss Shane for months and then attacked Bryan for firing them the night he was announced as being cleared. Therefore it’s a tag match with Owens and Zayn fighting for their jobs. Yeah that’s all well and good. The point here is Bryan actually getting back in the ring, which is almost impossible to imagine.

Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon

Owens and Zayn beat McMahon up on Smackdown to cover for Shane’s legitimate medical issues. Chris Jericho was apparently on red phone alert for this show with a plan to have him fly in from a Fozzy show on the corporate jet in case Shane couldn’t make the show. Bryan gets a special entrance with a weird military/Terminator themed video showing a target on the Superdome before looking at the YES Movement spreading throughout the world in a cool moment. You can feel the emotions in Bryan as he comes down the aisle and it’s an amazing sight to behold.

Owens and Zayn jump the good guys from behind and Shane gets thrown over the barricade. Bryan takes a Helluva kick and the apron powerbomb to leave him laying. Medics come out to check on Bryan as yes, they actually are trying to stretch this out even further. Shane is willing to fight on his own and unloads with the really bad punches to Owens in the corner.

There’s the jumping back elbow but Shane grabs his stomach due to the diverticulitis (the same thing that ruined Lesnar’s UFC career). A DDT drops Sami but Owens gets in a shot to the stomach to cut Shane off. We settle down into a regular match with Sami elbowing the ribs and going for one cover after another. Owens steps on the ribs and applauds Bryan for such a great return. A t-bone suplex gives Sami two and a superkick into the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The fans don’t care about this whatsoever and there’s no reason for them to.

With Bryan STILL being tended to at ringside, it’s just a big waiting game until Bryan gets back up and makes the hot tag. The Helluva Kick misses in the corner and Sami gets tied in the Tree of Woe. Coast to Coast hits but Shane can’t follow up because of the stomach. Owens drops the frog splash on Shane but Bryan dives in for the save to bring the fans back to life. The hot tag is cut off though and we hit the chinlock to make the fans wait a little longer. A belly to back suplex gets Shane out of trouble though and there’s the tag, with Bryan taking his time before getting in for an awesome moment.

House is cleaned and it’s the moonsault over Sami into the running clothesline. Owens comes back in and Bryan gets them in opposite corners for alternating running dropkicks. Sami is back with a Helluva Kick for two on Bryan and Owens superkicks Shane to the floor. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets two more and Owens is shocked at the kickout. Shane dives onto Owens, leaving Sami to yell at Bryan for coming back and punch him in the face. That’s enough for Bryan and the fight is on, including the YES Kicks. The running knee sets up the YES Lock to make Sami tap at 15:24.

Rating: C+. This was two matches in one with the rather boring beatdown of Shane for the first half before Bryan came in and gave the fans exactly what they wanted for the second half. It was all about Bryan and that’s all it was supposed to be. The idea that he actually made it back to the ring is amazing and one of the most surprising stories you’ll ever see in wrestling. He deserved a big moment like this and that’s what we got here, albeit after Shane got in his own time of course.

Attendance announcement, with pyro because it’s Wrestlemania.

We recap Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss. They were friends, but Jax found out that Bliss was making fun of her behind her back. Jax went into monster mode and chased after Bliss and her friend Mickie James, setting up this match. Now there’s no reason this shouldn’t be about thirty seconds long, but it’s Wrestlemania and what matters is getting on the card and having a long match instead of doing what makes sense.

Raw Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax

Bliss, with James in her corner, is defending and is lowered down to the stage on a platform for a nice touch. We get the Big Match Intros and Bliss immediately backs up as she should. Jax gets smart and runs Mickie over before the bell rings to send her outside for a heck of a beatdown. Bliss tries to intervene and gets glared back to the ring, leaving James to take a Samoan drop on the floor.

We get back inside for the opening bell and Bliss slaps her in the face. That earns a scream from Nia so Bliss screams back in true scream queen fashion. A gorilla press slam has Bliss bailing to the floor and it’s time to leave, only to have Nia run her over again. Back in and Bliss pokes her in the eye before going after the knee in a smart move.

What’s not a smart move is this match already going nearly three minutes with Bliss getting in any significant offense. A basement dropkick keeps Jax in trouble but a guillotine choke is easily countered via an overhead belly to belly suplex. Jax goes shoulder first into the post as the fans are quiet all over again. Twisted Bliss to a standing Nia on the floor gives Bliss another knockdown, setting up the short DDT for two back inside.

Bliss yells at her so Nia tells her to shut up already and the destruction begins. Another poke to the eye is no sold and Bliss gets whipped hard into the buckles. Bliss goes to the eye again to get out of the Samoan drop but Jax drives her into the corner and then drops her. That’s not enough as it’s a super Samoan drop to give Jax the pin and the title at 9:02.

Rating: D-. What were they thinking here? The whole story was that Bliss was all talk and survived because of Nia but then she hangs with Nia for the better part of ten minutes? This should have been thirty seconds long with Bliss getting the title back later on (as she did in June) after coming back from getting squashed. Just a bad idea all around here, save for Jax FINALLY winning the title.

We recap AJ Styles defending the Smackdown World Title against Shinsuke Nakamura. They had a classic match in Japan and a lot of fans wanted to see it again in WWE. Nakamura won the Royal Rumble and the match was on, with both guys trying to get in the other’s head on the way to New Orleans. So yeah, they’re just going with “it’s a dream match” for the build, which works just fine.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by Nita Strauss (awesome guitar player and rather gorgeous at the same time). The army of violinists and drummers help too. Since WWE can’t go more than five minutes without making some kind of a mistake, AJ is billed as Universal Champion. They lock up to start with Nakamura getting the better of it with some knees to the ribs.

Good Vibrations is blocked and AJ gets in his own knee before starting in on the back. Styles grabs a chinlock for a bit before dropkicking him to the floor. That’s not the best idea though as it’s a kick to the head to stagger Styles and the champ is in trouble for the first time. Nakamura’s middle rope kick to the face gets two and that’s a COME ON to set up the strikes to the face.

The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two but AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant. A sliding forearm into the pumphandle gutbuster gets two on Nakamura as they’re trading big spots. AJ’s springboard is countered into the Landslide (Samoan driver) for two but Nakamura needs a minute before following up. With nothing else working, Nakamura goes with the kicks, which are countered into the Calf Crusher.

Since it’s Nakamura, that’s reversed into a triangle choke, which AJ powers into something like a fisherman’s buster for another double knockdown. It’s Nakamura up first and trying a running knee in the corner but the bad knee hit the buckle instead. AJ is right back with a Phenomenal Forearm for two in the required kickout of the first finisher.

The springboard 450 hits knees and Nakamura grabs a small package for two of his own. They slug it out until AJ nails the Pele but can’t follow up, allowing Nakamura to knee him in the back of the head for a much nearer fall. The reverse exploder looks to set up the Kinshasa but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin to retain at 20:21.

Rating: B+. This was close to being a classic but it’s really just a very good match instead. Part of the problem here is how late the match came in the show. The fans were starting to get worn down and there was only so much energy left in the people. Also it never quite got to the epic level that they were shooting for with Nakamura never really getting the close near falls that he needed to take it to another level. Still that, very good and worthy of a Wrestlemania title match.

We recap the Kickoff Show. This is another few minutes that could be cut off.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

The Bar is defending after Strowman won a battle royal to become #1 contenders despite not having a partner. Therefore the big question for over a month is who would the partner be. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float, complete with people in large headed costumes for a cool visual. There’s no partner for Strowman, who breaks up the float before coming to the ring.

Strowman and the kid get in the ring where the kid is introduced as Nicholas (the son of referee John Cone). Cole: “This is really happening.” He’s never been more right. Oh and the search for a partner and introduction took about four and a half minutes, again because this show can just keep going. Strowman takes Sheamus into the corner with no problem to start before beating up Cesaro as well.

Nicholas is terrified (as he should be) as Cesaro dropkicks Strowman in the knee. A double suplex lets Sheamus drop a top rope knee, setting up an assisted swanton from Sheamus’ shoulders. Strowman comes back with a double crossbody and backdrops Sheamus over the top, bouncing him off the post in the process. To cap it off, Strowman tags Nicholas in. The kid is terrified and tags Strowman back in for the powerslam to Cesaro for the pin and the titles at 3:58.

Rating: F. I….what do you want from me here? This was an idea that completely failed because WWE had no idea what to do here and this is all they could do. Put Heath Slater or someone in there, or have Strowman do a rendition of Me And My Shadow and have him win it by himself. It was a joke that was literally forgotten the next night and stretched the show out even more because they couldn’t just cut this and put Strowman ANYWHERE else. I’m sure Matt Hardy had to win the battle royal right?

Wrestlemania 35 is in New York/Jersey. You don’t hear New Jersey mentioned here, but I guess it’s just implied.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. It’s the latest attempt to make Reigns feel like the mega star because the first few times didn’t take. Therefore he won the Elimination Chamber (beating Strowman after Strowman eliminated everyone else), THIS TIME FOR SURE! Lesnar has been champion for a year and barely ever defends the title, because that was so successful the first few times. Their fights over the last few weeks get the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and WOW the fans are not happy to see him. To make it a little better, Brock drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs, followed by the German suplexes. Reigns pops up with a Superman Punch to send Brock to the floor as they’re starting fast again. Back in and a clothesline knocks Lesnar over the top and out to the floor as the fans chant things to amuse themselves.

Lesnar catches him with a belly to belly on the floor and another one drops Reigns on his head. There’s the required CM PUNK chant and a third belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table because Brock didn’t realize how much room he had. Back in and Lesnar throws another German suplex, declaring it SUPLEX CITY B****. More suplexes ensue because that’s what Lesnar does in a big time match. Brock gets tired of that and loads up the announcers’ table but Reigns posts him for a much needed breather.

A spear puts Lesnar onto (not through) another table as the fans boo the heck out of this. Or maybe they’re mad about losing a beach ball. The Superman Punch into a pair of spears gets two and now the fans are definitely happy with a beach ball. Brock blocks a spear with a knee to the face that brings Graves out of his chair.

The first F5 gets two and virtually no reaction from the crowd. Another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. To switch it up, another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. The fans declare it boring so Lesnar takes him outside for the fourth F5 through the announcers’ table. Lesnar takes it back inside and stands there as the fans do something else in the crowd that goes from cheering to booing during the same closeup.

The fifth F5 gets two so Lesnar takes the gloves off at Heyman’s orders. The fans call it awful as Lesnar hammers away to bust Reigns open. It’s quite the gusher but Reigns slips out of the F5 and hits a pair of spears for two. Another spear is countered into the sixth F5 to retain the title at 15:51.

Rating: D+. Well of course he does. The problem here is that there is good action in the match but it’s too much of the same stuff and the fans having none of it that took away its value. Couple that with knowing that we’re just waiting on even more Reigns title shots and promos about needing to be champion and there was no way this was going to work. The fans (including myself) were done with this WAY before the match started and that’s all there was to it.

Reigns gets cleaned up and we get the long video package. Back in the stadium, Reigns leaves and the show ends. I stood around for a long time while this was going on because the video doesn’t play in the stadium and it wasn’t clear if the show was over or not.

Overall Rating: C-. I know I (and a lot of other people) say it over and over but it’s just too long. There is a limit to how long you can sit watching wrestling in person or at home and Wrestlemania has blown past that for years now. At some point you just stop caring and there’s very little that can be done to fix such a problem. They need to do something because this isn’t going to work no matter what they do. Cut out a lot of stuff and it’s a great show, but the whole package didn’t work.

There’s a lot of good stuff in here, such as the opener, AJ vs. Nakamura, Charlotte vs. Asuka, the mixed tag and a few other moments here and there. The problem is there’s so much other stuff that either doesn’t work (the main event, the Raw Women’s Title match and the Raw Tag Team Titles are great places to start) that it really doesn’t work. Get rid of some of that and the show is that much better.

Overall, it comes down to the problem of WWE not listening to the fans. They can throw out as much good content as they want, but if you do it to annoy the fans (the US Title match) or to stretch things out even further past its expiration point (the Universal Title), it’s going to come back to mess things up. There is so much on here that fans don’t want to see and WWE just won’t fix it.

That doesn’t help the length either. If you have a show where the final match is something the fans do not want to see, you’re going to have them sitting there, already annoyed at other things in the show, for hours waiting to see something that only WWE seems interested in. How is that supposed to be appealing for over seven hours? Cut it down, give us something else to cheer for, and remember that Wrestlemania is supposed to be about the best of the best, not everyone on the roster.

Ratings Comparison

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D-

Redo: D+

Mustafa Ali vs. Cedric Alexander

Original: B-

Redo: B

Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: F+

Seth Rollins vs. The Miz vs. Finn Balor

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Asuka

Original: A-

Redo: A

Jinder Mahal vs. Rusev vs. Randy Orton vs. Bobby Roode

Original: D

Redo: D+

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey

Original: A-

Redo: A

New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B+

Braun Strowman/Nicholas vs. The Bar

Original: F

Redo: F

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C-

This is an interesting one as most of the matches are within the same ballpark but I liked the show a lot better the first time around. Maybe the good was more fun just after the show, but this really didn’t do it for me nearly as well on another viewing. It’s watchable, but definitely not a very good show.

Here’s the original if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/04/14/wrestlemania-xxxiv-the-same-old-story/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Royal Rumble 2019
Date: January 27, 2019
Location: Chase Field, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 48,193
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

It’s time to go back to the stadium with another major show. The Royal Rumble has changed a good bit in recent years as it is now another extended show with a pair of Royal Rumble matches instead of just one. No one is exactly jumping off the page as a favorite in either of them, though Becky Lynch is currently the most popular person in the company. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Bobby Roode/Chad Gable vs. Scott Dawson/Rezar

Non-title but if Dawson and Rezar (regular partners injured) win, the regular teams get a title shot each. And yes, this match was completely necessary as a last minute addition. The match is so awesome that a cameraman falls down during Roode and Gable’s entrance for the always fun camera shot. Drake Maverick is with Dawson and Rezar. Dawson’s headlock on Roode doesn’t get very far as Roode takes him into the corner for a monkey flip from Gable. Wilder wouldn’t have let that happen.

An exchange of near falls doesn’t go very far so Gable hits a springboard spinning crossbody for two. Dawson takes him down though and catapults Gable into a chokeslam to put the champs in trouble. Rezar chokes on the rope and Dawson grabs a northern lights suplex for two. The chinlock doesn’t last long as it’s back to Rezar to keep knocking Gable around.

Dawson sends him into the ropes but they bang heads for a double knockdown. Rezar comes back in and tries another chokeslam but Gable reverses into an armbar over the ropes. That’s enough for the hot tag off to Roode, who hits a spinebuster on Dawson. Back up and Dawson dropkicks Rezar by mistake, leaving Roode to take a neckbreaker/moonsault combination for the pin at 6:55.

Rating: D+. This would be a textbook definition of a match that did not need to be added to the show and did nothing more than fill in time. As usual, that’s not a good idea and yet it keeps happening around here almost every show. I’m not sure how much of a point there was to having the makeshift tag team thrown out there to lose when Akam wasn’t going to be back for months. Nothing good here and a match that didn’t need to happen.

Kickoff Show: United States Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Rusev

Nakamura is challenging and Lana is here with Rusev. Nakamura gets driven into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs and a suplex brings him right back out. They head outside but Nakamura gets in a running kick to the face off the steps, setting up the running knee to the jaw. Back in and Bad Vibrations into the running knee to the ribs gets two and we hit the front facelock. Rusev fights up and punches away, setting up the spinwheel kick for two.

Rating: C-. Just a little better than the opener but not all that much. Nakamura taking the title from Rusev just over a month into the title reign doesn’t exactly mean much, but that’s the case with so many of the midcard title changes around here. The match was a watchable enough power exchange but it still feels like a title change for the sake of a title change.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Hideo Itami vs. Kalisto vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Buddy Murphy

Murphy is defending, one fall to a finish, and Ariya Daivari is here with Itami. They circle each other for a bit until Itami rolls to the floor. That leaves the other three to trade rollups for two each until Murphy hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to drop Tozawa. Kalisto’s very springboardy hurricanrana is broken up as everything breaks down again. Kalisto tries a Cannonball off the apron but gets caught in Murphy’s suplex instead.

Itami gets back in and poses, meaning it’s time for the showdown with Murphy. The champ gets struck down in the corner and Itami demands respect as we can see his future going down the drain in a hurry. Murphy goes outside and tries to powerbomb Kalisto into the barricade, only to have Tozawa hit a suicide dive into Kalisto, which sends Murphy into the barricade for a crash. Itami throws Kalisto and Tozawa back inside so he can get two on each of them.

A Murphy distraction lets Kalisto kick Itami in the head and it’s a monkey flip to send Tozawa onto Murphy on the floor. Murphy comes back in and gets missile dropkicked by Tozawa, only to have Itami break up the top rope backsplash. Itami gets knocked to the outside though and Tozawa hits a suicide headbutt. Kalisto and Murphy follow with dives of their own with the champ getting the best of it.

Back in and Kalisto hits a hurricanrana driver for two on Murphy, who is right back up with a Liger Bomb for his own near fall. Tozawa scores with a reverse hurricanrana on Murphy but it’s Itami breaking that up. The Salida Del Sol gets two on Itami and everyone is down. A series of kicks puts everyone down again for a bit so Murphy knees Kalisto and Tozawa. Murphy slips out of whatever Itami’s spinning knee deal was (I STILL don’t get that one) and knees him down as well, setting up Murphy’s Law to retain at 12:06.

Rating: B-. Now that’s more like it with an action packed twelve minute match that actually felt like it mattered for a change. Or at least it felt like a match that had been set up more than thirty seconds before they came to the ring. Murphy continues to look like a star and it’s easy to see why he’s a much bigger deal just a year later.

The opening video looks at how important the Rumble is, with some great historical footage included. It has more history than any show not named Wrestlemania so it’s a smart move to go into that well. This switches into your regular opening video, which does its usual good job at looking at the rest of the card.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Asuka

Asuka is defending after taking the title from Becky in a TLC match at TLC, with Charlotte being included as well. Becky is on fire at this point and it’s a matter of time before she gets the big hero moment. They go with the aggressive lockup to start and that goes absolutely nowhere. Becky’s running shoulder earns her a running dropkick and a lot of shouting from the champ. Neither of them can get the arm so Asuka kicks her in the leg for two instead.

Becky is right back up with shots to the face and a kick to the ribs, followed by a running clothesline to sent Asuka to the floor. They switches places and you just don’t do that to Asuka, who scores with the running hip attack. Asuka heads outside as well and gets sent into the apron, only to send Becky into the post. The Bexploder sends Asuka into the barricade though and Becky is starting to seethe.

That means the aggressive stomping in the corner and the next of what is likely to be a bunch of armbars. That’s broken up so Becky avoids another hip attack and hammers away in the ropes. Asuka isn’t about to get beaten up though and pulls Becky into the Asuka Lock while still in the ropes. With that broken up, Becky fights out of the corner and grabs a Disarm-Her in the corner. That doesn’t last long either so Asuka knees her out of the air. Asuka strikes away but misses a missile dropkick so Becky can hit a Rock Bottom for two.

Back up again and they fight to the apron with Asuka hitting a fisherman’s neckbreaker to the floor and they’re both down. Asuka is in first and Becky beats the count, earning herself a basement dropkick to the head. They slug it out until Asuka kicks her head off for two. Asuka goes up so Becky stops her with a kick of her own and a super Bexploder gets a rather near fall as the crowd is staying right with them.

The middle rope legdrop misses though and Asuka catches her in a Disarm-Her. To keep up the same line of thinking, Becky gets her own Asuka Lock before switching to the Disarm-Her. Becky is too weak to get it on in full so Asuka rolls out and grabs the Asuka Lock and flips forward Cattle Mutilation style for the tag at 17:09.

Rating: B+. These two beat the heck out of each other and that finisher was the mega death version of the Asuka Lock. It’s really weird to see Becky lose though and it was even more surprising watching this live as Becky was the hottest thing around. Having her tap is a bit much, but sweet goodness would they get mileage out of that loss. The counters and different styles were awesome here though and it’s a near instant classic.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Shane McMahon/The Miz vs. The Bar

The Bar is defending and Miz’s dad is in the front row. Miz and Shane are together because of the Best In The World tournament but Shane has agreed to be nice to him so they can succeed together. In other words, expect the Shane Show to continue. Shane spears Sheamus down at the bell and it’s time for an early breather. Miz comes in to roll Cesaro up for two but it’s way too early for the Skull Crushing Finale.

Sheamus grabs Miz from behind to hold him in the corner though and Cesaro scores with the running uppercut. A right hand knocks Shane to the floor so Miz kicks away to avenge his fallen partner. They all head outside with Miz having to be saved from a double powerbomb through the announcers’ table. It’s too early for the big elbow through the table so Shane hits a top rope clothesline on Sheamus instead.

Shane gets sent hard into the barricade and that should let him stay down and use up all the oxygen in the first three rows. Back in and Sheamus drops a knee on Miz before cranking on the arm. The ten forearms to the chest and a double suplex back in get two as Shane is back up onto the apron. Cesaro drops a middle rope ax handle for two and Sheamus comes back in to talk more trash.

Miz sends Sheamus to the floor though and a backdrop puts Cesaro down as well. That’s finally enough for the hot tag to Shane and it’s bad punches a go-go. A DDT gets two on Sheamus and Shane loads up Coast To Coast to both of them at once. Cesaro pulls him out of the air and into the Swing though and it’s a rather long one this time.

Since it was just a really long Swing, Shane is right back with a triangle choke. Sheamus makes a save and it’s the spike White Noise for two, with no one making the save. Well you knew he was going to kick out of at least one finisher. Miz is back in to save Shane from the Brogue Kick, which hits Cesaro by mistake. The shooting star press finishes Cesaro for the titles at 13:23.

Rating: C. It’s every complaint about a Shane match that you could find: he’s pushed too hard, he looks ready to explode from hyperventilating after about eighteen seconds and he kicks out of a big finisher. Oh and now he’s a champion, naturally getting the pin in the process. It had already gotten bad and it was only going to get worse from here.

Shane and Miz celebrate with Papa Mizanin as the announcers get to praise Shane a bit.

Cole announces the attendance and Meltzer has a correction out immediately.

We recap Ronda Rousey vs. Sasha Banks. Rousey wants to see Banks get fired up and is ready to show us the difference between a Boss and a champion. Sasha promised to prove how good she was and made Natalya tap in a tag match on Monday. Graves: “It’s one thing to make Natalya submit.” Nice little unintentional insult there.

Sasha isn’t concerned about keeping her emotions in check. Tonight, she’s proving that she’s the best in the world.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Ronda Rousey

Rousey is defending and goes straight for the armbar but Banks armdrags her right back down. A springboard armdrag doesn’t work that well and Rousey mocks Banks’ pose. Rousey tries her own Three Amigos but Banks blocks the third, only to have to go to the ropes to avoid an armbar. A kick to the ribs puts Banks on the floor but Rousey punches the post by mistake.

That lets Banks hit a suicide dive to put Rousey down for a change. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Banks hits the running knees in the corner instead. Back up and Rousey hits a running elbow to the face for two so Banks hits a running knee of her own for the same. Rousey shrugs it off and loads up Piper’s Pit but gets reversed into a nasty armbar, complete with some finger bending.

Banks switches over into the Bank Statement but it’s broken up in a hurry. Now Piper’s Pit can connect and Rousey armbars her over the ropes. Rousey goes up but gets superplexed right back down so Banks can go back to the armbar. You don’t do that to Rousey, who rolls Banks over with some judo throws. They go outside with Rousey grabbing the armbar in full to make Banks tap.

Back in and Rousey hammers away in the corner but Banks gets in a shot of her own for the double knockdown. The armbar is broken up again and another Piper’s Pit is countered into a crossbody. The Bank Statement goes on until Banks switches to a Fujiwara armbar. Rousey rolls out and gutwrench suplexes the heck out of her, setting up another Piper’s Pit for the pin at 13:49.

Rating: B. This took time to get going but they were rolling at the end. Rousey was such a freak of nature as she probably hadn’t had 25 matches by this point (certainly not 10 big ones) and was going back and forth with one of the best around on the big stage. The battle of the submissions attempts worked well here and I got way into this all over again.

Post match they do a left handed handshake since Banks’ arm is wrecked. Banks does hold up the Horsewomen sign though because she isn’t the nicest loser in the world.

We recap the Kickoff Show. We’re so lucky.

John Cena has been injured and won’t be participating in the Royal Rumble. He was totally and really here and everything though. Honest. Braun Strowman is replacing him.

Beth Phoenix joins commentary.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and Lacey Evans (making her main roster in-ring debut, save for a random Main Event match) is in at #1, meaning she needs to introduce herself. Natalya is in at #2 and Lacey runs the ropes to start. Neither can hit a dropkick and Lacey can’t quite do a nip up. A clothesline can’t get rid of Natalya and she reverses a powerbomb with a hurricanrana. Natalya hits the discus lariat as Mandy Rose is in at #3, sending Graves over the edge all over again.

Another discus lariat drops Mandy and it’s the double Sharpshooter, which Graves says is like the even more stuffed Oreos. Liv Morgan is in at #4 and is out in less than ten seconds. Lacey and Mandy start double teaming Natalya but Lacey sends Mandy into the corner for the double Bronco Buster. Mickie James is in at #5, giving us the first non-blonde. House is cleaned in a hurry until Mickie has to save herself from being tossed by Mandy. Ember Moon is in at #6 and gets to clean house as well. No one can eliminate anyone else and it’s Billie Kay in at #7.

She’s fine with staying on the floor though, saying she’s going to wait for Peyton Royce to go in. More non-eliminations continue and it’s Nikki Cross in at #8 (Graves: “Batten down the hatches.” I really need to find out what hatches are and what it means to batten something.). She runs over Billie at ringside and then dives onto everyone else inside. Mandy and Nikki have a weird showdown with Nikki getting the better of it. Billie is inside now and get beaten up as well because she isn’t great on her own. Peyton Royce is in at #9 and it’s IIconics time. The team beats down Nikki and it’s time to fight on the ropes some more.

Tamina is in at #10, giving us Lacey, Natalya, Mandy, Mickie, Ember, Billie, Nikki Peyton and Tamina, meaning the ring is too full. Tamina gets to wreck people until Nikki gets to have another not that interesting staredown. A dropkick and tackle put Tamina through the ropes but she’s right back in with a kick to Nikki’s face. Mickie low bridges Tamina to the apron but she comes back in with the Superfly Splash to Nikki. A superkick gets rid of Mickie and it’s Xia Li in at #11.

Li kicks away at a lot of people but gets knocked down by Tamina. Sarah Logan, in Braveheart paint, is in at #12 as the ring is full and the crowd is dead. Ember has to hang on by her feet but pulls herself back in (finally a reaction) and the IIconics get rid of Cross. Charlotte is in at #13 and PLEASE get rid of some people. She gets jumped on the way in but everyone is fought off in a hurry. Lacey eliminates both IIconics at once and Charlotte kicks Li out to finally clear the ring a bit. Charlotte and Tamina have a staredown (NO ONE CARES ABOUT TAMINA!!!) and Charlotte gets rocked by a superkick.

Kairi Sane is in at #14 and she runs to the ring while looking through a telescope because of course she does. Charlotte gets rid of Tamina as Sane dives in. Charlotte chops Sane down but she’s right back up with the Insane Elbow to Logan. That’s enough to get rid of Sarah and it’s Maria Kanellis in at #15. She breaks up a staredown between Charlotte and Lacey, including a double bulldog. Charlotte is back up with a spear to Maria, who apparently doesn’t belong in this ring.

Naomi is in at #16 and that wakes the crowd up a bit. Mandy sends Naomi to the apron but gets backdropped out, only to pull Naomi to the floor. The feet don’t touch so Naomi backflips onto the barricade, tightrope walks across, and does a crazy athletic jump from the barricade to the steps. And then Mandy pulls her off the steps for the elimination anyway in a great heel move. Charlotte kicks Lacey out and it’s Candice LeRae in at #17. Candice Black Widows Ember but it’s broken up in a hurry.

Natalya powerbombs Charlotte out of the corner and it’s Alicia Fox in at #18 (I had almost forgotten about her.). Maria wants to be friends with Alicia so they beat up Sane. Alicia puts her captain’s hat on Maria before stopping to dance. Maria throws it on the ground and stomps on it….sending Alicia into a fit. She’s back up to eliminate Maria though as Kacy Catanzaro is in at #19 and starts with the hurricanranas. A slingshot version puts Alicia on the apron but she skins the cat to come back in.

Zelina Vega is in at #20, giving us Natalya, Moon, Charlotte, Sane, Candice, Alicia, Catanzaro and Vega. Candice and Vega slug it out as fallout from Andrade vs. Johnny Gargano but they slow down, meaning it’s yet another lull. Ruby Riott is in at #21 and has Logan and Morgan with her so all three pull Charlotte to the floor for some triple teaming. Fox gets the same treatment and Vega rolls to the floor to hide underneath the ring.

Riott throws Fox back inside and then eliminates her, followed by a powerbomb into the barricade for LeRae and another elimination. Dana Brooke is in at #22 and hits a weird looking sitout powerbomb on Catanzaro. Now the Squad pulls Brooke to the floor (I really can’t stand this whole people being on the floor but not eliminated deal as it makes things more confusing than they need to be) and Riott eliminates Sane. Io Shirai is in at #23 and dropkicks the Squad down, setting up the big moonsault to the floor (she was never in so it’s not an elimination).

Shirai and Riott go over the top to the apron for a slugout but they both get back in. Rhea Ripley is in at #24 but the star power hasn’t started for her just yet. She wrecks things a bit until Moon takes her down with a wheelbarrow faceplant. Brooke kicks Catanzaro to the floor but she holds her legs up, hand walks to the post, flips up to it and climbs back in to blow away Naomi’s save. Ripley blocks Catanzaro’s spinning DDT though and tosses her out for real.

Sonya Deville is in at #25 and spears Moon down but Brooke hits her with a shoulder. Brooke enziguris Ripley but gets sent to the apron and dropkicked out. Vega leans from under the ring to laugh at Brooke….and here’s freaking Hornswoggle to chase Vega back inside. That doesn’t last long as Ripley throws her out, with Hornswoggle chasing Vega to the back. Alexa Bliss is in at #26 to a MAJOR pop in her first match since September. The moonsault knees to the ribs hit Moon but Sonya pounds Bliss down in the corner. Bliss is right back by sending her to the apron though and a right hand gets rid of Sonya.

Bayley is in at lucky #27 and gets her own house cleaning segment, including a clothesline to get rid of Riott. That’s not all though as she knocks Ripley out as well as Lana is in at #28. Well not in really as she can barely walk due to her ankle injury from earlier. The trainer comes out to check on her in the aisle as Shirai saves herself from an elimination. Lana is still being checked on as Nia Jax is in at #29, only to jump Lana in the aisle for a bonus.

Fit Finlay comes out to tell her to go to the ring and it’s time for the giant to wreck some people. Shirai makes the mistake of trying a moonsault and gets knocked out in a hurry. Natalya somehow gets Jax up for a fireman’s carry but can’t do anything else with it and gets eliminated after 56 minutes. Carmella is in at #30 (an honor she won in Mixed Match Challenge), giving us a final group of Moon, Charlotte, Bliss, Bayley, Lana, Jax and Carmella, though Lana hasn’t gotten anywhere near the ring.

Carmella gets in a dropkick on Moon but Jax runs her over. Hold on though as Lana is still down so here’s Becky Lynch to say she wants the spot instead. Finlay says do it and the fans are WAY into this again. Becky gets the long awaited showdown with Jax but Charlotte breaks it up and sends Becky to the apron. That doesn’t work either and it’s Becky coming back in with a missile dropkick to Jax. Bliss goes after Moon and pulls her to the apron by the hair (freaking ow man) and then chokeshoves her out after a rather ridiculous 53 minutes.

Carmella hits a Bronco Buster on Bliss and there’s a Buckle Bomb from Bayley. Carmella and Bayley team up to throw Bliss out so Jax clotheslines them both. Charlotte saves Becky from Jax’s facebreaker so Carmella gives Becky a Downward Spiral instead. For some reason Charlotte goes up top so Carmella tries a running headscissors, only to get sent to the apron.

That lasts all of two seconds but Charlotte puts her out there again and a big boot gets us down to four (Bayley, Jax, Charlotte and Becky). Bayley dropkicks Charlotte and Jax against the ropes but Jax is right back with a big boot to eliminate Bayley, leaving us with three. The three way showdown is on with Jax splashing both of them in the corner. That sends Becky to the floor (not out) and it’s a Charlotte vs. Jax showdown that is a little more interesting than it sounds.

Something like a slow motion AA has Jax in trouble but Charlotte can’t follow up. Charlotte gets her onto the apron and Becky pulls her out, leaving us with Charlotte vs. Becky in the rivalry that won’t end. Hold on though as Jax shoves Becky off the steps and we have a knee injury. Referees check on her but Becky pulls herself back in for the fight. Well kind of at least as Becky falls straight back down as soon as she’s inside.

Becky says it’s her time and Charlotte has already taken enough from her. Charlotte, obviously, goes right after the knee but Becky kicks her in the face. She sends Charlotte to the apron but another kick to the leg cuts off the rally. Charlotte misses a charge though and a forearm sends Becky to Wrestlemania at 1:11:23.

Rating: D+. The Becky parts made it better but WOW this was badly laid out. There were far too many instances of people just standing around and doing nothing with several people staying in there too long. Ember for 52 minutes? Natalya for 56? Mandy Rose for nearly 26? You don’t need everyone in there for that long and it’s ok to come up with something other than “everyone stays on the ropes while two people do something in the middle” over and over. They got the right winner but it was a heck of a chore to get there.

Becky can barely stand but is very pleased with the results. The celebration goes on for a LONG time.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Daniel Bryan for the Smackdown World Title. Bryan turned heel to steal the title and became the crazy environmentalist so, after losing to Brock Lesnar at Survivor Series, it’s time for a (second) rematch. AJ is out to show that he isn’t complacent, which included attacking Vince McMahon in a story that went nowhere.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Daniel Bryan

AJ is challenging. We get the Big Match Intros and AJ hammers him down in the corner so the champ bails for a bit. Back in and they fight on the mat for a bit with AJ’s wristlock not getting him very far. A headlock works a bit better as the first gear work continues. Bryan bails to the floor again but comes back in….to get punched in the face. An uppercut puts Styles in the corner and he gets dropped chest first onto the post to give Bryan a target.

Bryan starts in on the shoulder and cranks on a hammerlock on the mat with Styles having to use his foot to reach a rope. A cross armbreaker is broken up as well so Bryan punches him in the face to even the score. AJ scores with a dropkick and the pinfall reversal sequence gets some near falls each. Bryan tosses him hard into the corner and that means the running dropkick.

A dragon suplex has AJ (with his bloody nose) rocked again and Bryan kicks him off the top and out to the floor. Bryan goes out after him but it’s the moonsault off the barricade into the perfect reverse DDT (that’s one of the best he’s ever hit). Back in and the springboard 450 hits Bryan’s knees, meaning the LeBell Lock goes on. Not to be outdone, AJ escapes and reverses into the Calf Crusher to stay on the knee.

That’s broken up as well and they’re both down for a bit. Bryan gets up first and kicks away at the arm, setting up the big kick to the head for two. AJ catches him on top and they slug it out up there, with Styles backflipping out of a belly to back superplex. The Calf Crusher goes on again before AJ switches to a cradle for two instead. Neither can get a backslide so AJ grabs a brainbuster for two more.

Rating: B+. I’m not wild on the ending but you can’t have AJ lose a clean fall here. They were working a heck of a match here with both of them going with their own style and having the other broken down. I don’t particularly care for Rowan interfering, but he and Bryan would wind up being a nice enough team so well done, even if it wasn’t the best feeling at the time.

Post match Rowan holds AJ up for the running knee from Bryan so things can continue.

We recap Finn Balor vs. Brock Lesnar for the Raw World Title in a match hyped up as David vs. Goliath. Balor is small but can do extraordinary stuff so he wants to fight Lesnar. This isn’t the Demon for reasons of Balor wanting to do it himself, even though the Demon IS Balor, meaning the whole thing doesn’t make a lot of sense. Or they just don’t want Lesnar losing because that wouldn’t be very Lesnarish.

Raw World Title: Finn Balor vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Balor dropkicks him at the bell to start and another running dropkick sends him into the corner. The first belly to belly cuts him off in a hurry though and we settle down for the first time. Another belly to belly on the floor rocks Balor again and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table.

Balor sends him ribs first into the corner of said table though and he does it again for painful measure. Brock can barely stand up as he throws Balor back inside for the shoulders in the corner. Another belly to belly has Balor flying but Lesnar is wincing a bit. Lesnar gets in yet another suplex but this time Balor is up with a Sling Blade. That’s it for the offense though as Lesnar BLASTS him with a clothesline.

Lesnar can’t hit a German suplex though as the stomach gives out. The F5 is countered into a DDT and Balor gets smart by stomping at the ribs. The big flip dive to the floor puts Lesnar down again and Balor hits a second for good measure. A third flip dive takes Lesnar down again but Renee says we’re having a new champion to end Balor’s hopes. Back in and Balor kicks him in the face, setting up the Coup de Grace for two, with Lesnar spinning into the Kimura on the kickout, making Balor tap at 8:36.

Rating: C+. Well that was short. They had some moments in there but at the same time, Lesnar wasn’t exactly doing much for the first half of the match. It got better once he was selling but there are only so many things you can do in less than nine minutes. The stuff with Lesnar’s stomach being messed up was enough to go somewhere, but this was only so good.

Post match Lesnar beats Balor up a few more times. This is something else that went nowhere.

Jerry Lawler and JBL join commentary.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals again and Elias is in at #1, meaning it’s time for a song. Well make that insulting Phoenix until he’s interrupted by Jeff Jarrett of all people at #2. Jeff gets to strut and say ain’t I great as Elias is rather pleased by being interrupted by someone who brings something to the table. For now though, they need to sing together. And yes, they really are doing this three hours and forty minutes into a show with an hour long match to go. Jeff goes to spell his name so Elias hits him in the face to get things going.

Elias hammers away on the ropes and hits a clothesline so he can get in another catchphrase. A guitar shot to the back is enough to get rid of Jeff. Shinsuke Nakamura, last year’s winner, is in at #3 and he wastes no time in kicking Elias down. For some reason Elias goes up top for Old School, though it’s just an armdrag instead of a shot to the back. Kurt Angle is in at #4 to a big reaction and he starts in with the suplexes. Elias gets him in the corner though and it’s Big E. in at #5, with his gear including Kofi’s best Rumble moments. That’s rather cool….I think.

The Warrior Splash hits Nakamura but an Angle Slam takes Big E. down. Nakamura is back up with the running knee to Angle’s ribs and another running knee gets rid of Kurt. Honestly, it’s better to have him out that fast before he hurts himself again. Johnny Gargano is in at #6 and gets to clean house on Nakamura and Big E. The slingshot spear cuts Elias down and it’s Jinder Mahal in at #7. After he knocks everyone down, Gargano knocks Mahal out in about thirty seconds. The Singh Brothers get beaten up for a bonus and now it’s back to something that actually matters.

Samoa Joe is in at #8, just as Nakamura is surrounded in the corner. Elias gets kicked down and Joe just walks away from Gargano’s middle rope dive (that will always be cool). Joe dumps Big E. and it’s Curt Hawkins in at #9, still in the middle of his horrible losing streak. Hawkins gets in a few shots but bails to the floor in what is probably a smart move. The fans get behind Hawkins, even as Joe grabs him in the Koquina Clutch. For some reason Elias breaks that up and Hawkins bails to the floor again, this time hiding underneath the ring.

Seth Rollins is in at #10, giving us Elias, Nakamura, Gargano, Samoa Joe, Hawkins and Rollins. The springboard clotheslines hits Elias and there’s the Falcon Arrow to Gargano. Elias gets sent to the apron and then into the post for the elimination. It’s Titus O’Neil in at #11 and he crosses himself before charging to the ring, only to stop himself before getting to the apron in a funny moment. Titus sees Hawkins hiding underneath the ring and chases him inside, only to be eliminated almost immediately. Joe throws Hawkins out a second later to end the harmless comedy segment.

With the ring a little more cleared out, Kofi Kingston is in at #12 and things settle down a bit. As everyone fights by the ropes, Mustafa Ali is in at #13. Joe is waiting on him so Ali scores with a dropkick, only to get grabbed by Nakamura. That’s fine with Ali, who slips over the back and tells Nakamura to COME ON. Nakamura does just that and gets tossed out by Ali in quite the upset. Ali isn’t done either as he hits a tornado DDT on Gargano, only to get planted by Joe. Dean Ambrose, still in his pretty disastrous heel run, is in at #14 and goes right at it with Rollins, as expected.

With that broken up, Dean sends Kofi over the top but Kofi keeps one foot off the ground and rolls over to the steps to save himself. That’s not as good as his others, but maybe he’s crashing underneath the expectations. Kingston comes back in with a DDT to Dean, who is right back up to get rid of Gargano. No Way Jose, with the Conga Line, is in at #15 and Joe literally eliminates him in two seconds. No worries though as he and the Conga Line dance to the back as that was quite the use of an entrance.

Drew McIntyre is in at #16 and headbutts Jose for dancing too close to him. After cleaning some house, Joe and McIntyre slug it out for the hoss fight. The Claymore drops Joe and there’s one for Rollins as well as Xavier Woods is in at #17. As he is coming in, Kofi is knocked off the apron but sunset flips Woods, allowing him to keep one foot up.

Woods stands up with Kofi on his back (Cole to JBL: “I remember when you and Ron used to do this.”) and walks over to the steps for the real save of the year. Then McIntyre eliminates Woods and Kingston a second later because this show doesn’t like fun to last too long (completely appropriate for McIntyre of course). Pete Dunne is in at #18 and that gets a nice reaction. Dunne goes after Joe and Graves is rather pleased with everything going on at the moment.

Ali hangs on after being thrown to the apron and it’s Andrade in at #19. Andrade goes after Dunne in a match that sounds rather interesting indeed. With no one close to an elimination, Apollo Crews is in at #20, giving us Joe, Rollins, Ali, Ambrose, McIntyre, Dunne, Andrew and Apollo. McIntyre is sent to the apron and it’s Aleister Black (without the riser) in at #21. He goes right after Dunne in another match that sounds awesome (it’s almost like Dunne is great or something) but switches to Ambrose, with Black Mass connecting for the elimination.

Shelton Benjamin is in at #22 and goes at it with Crews for the athletic freak off. Crews saves himself from being eliminated as Shelton gets Koquina Clutched. That’s broken up and Ali dumps Joe in an upset. Baron Corbin is in at #23, fresh from his shift at *insert restaurant joke of the day here*. Deep Six drops Ali but he hangs onto the rope so Corbin knocks out Crews instead. Black and McIntyre slug it out and it’s Jeff Hardy in at #24 to keep the talent field high.

Lashley pulls Rollins, who low bridged him out, to the floor and beats the heck out of him to let off some steam. Rollins is spinebustered through the announcers’ table and it’s Braun Strowman in at lucky #27 for a possible (though unlikely) winner. Strowman knocks Corbin out in a hurry and there goes Benjamin a few seconds later. McIntyre dumps Hardy as Dolph Ziggler, his recent rival, is in at #28. That means a superkick to get rid of McIntyre and it’s Randy Orton in at #29 for the slow walk to the ring.

Strowman is right there for the showdown and the RKO is blocked in a hurry. Andrade loads up a superplex on Ali, so Strowman puts them BOTH on his shoulders with Mysterio diving off the top to take them down in your HOW CAN HE DO THAT spot of the match. R-Truth (also here because of the Mixed Match Challenge) is in at #30….but hang on as Nia Jax of all people jumps him from behind to take his spot, continuing the near trolling levels of a push. That gives us a final group of Rollins, Ali, Andrade, Orton, Strowman, Ziggler, Orton and Jax.

Nia gets to wreck some people and Ali is out in a hurry after a surprising thirty plus minutes. Orton stares Jax down but can’t hit the surprise RKO attempt, earning himself a shoulder down. Jax tells Rey to go for the 619 on Orton but cuts him off, only to get superkicked by Ziggler. The 619 hits Jax and Orton connects with the RKO, setting up a baseball slide from Mysterio to get rid of her.

Orton tosses Mysterio and Andrade dumps Orton, leaving us with Ziggler, Andrade, and Rollins and Strowman on the floor. Strowman comes back in and splashes Andrade and Ziggler in the corners to send them outside again. Hold on though as Strowman needs to go to the floor again to run Rollins over.

Everyone goes after Strowman in a 2004 flashback but he gets rid of Andrade and Ziggler. Rollins uses the momentum to put him on the apron but charges into a chokeslam. Back in and Rollins grabs a guillotine to pull Strowman to the apron and sends him into the post. A kick to the ribs sets up the Stomp on the apron to get rid of Strowman to give Rollins the win at 57:34.

Rating: B. This was much more like it with a nice mix of brawling, comedy, action and an only somewhat guaranteed winner. I know you can’t really hide the fact that someone is a shoe in winner but it’s nice to see them at least giving it a little bit more drama. Rollins winning made sense here as he had been on fire for the last year and needed something like this. Good Rumble, though there have been a lot better.

SIGN POINTING, yes I said SIGN POINTING, ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I’m curious to see how this one holds up against the original rating as the length was driving me crazy this time around. There is a lot of good stuff on here but EGADS it’s a two hour Kickoff Show and then four hours and forty minutes of the main show. You really needed to have the weird Tag Team Title deal on the Kickoff Show and then put Miz and Shane on the main show? That, plus Bryan vs. Styles, could have been on a big Smackdown at worst and this show could have been trimmed down by 45 minutes.

The only bad thing on here is the women’s Royal Rumble, but when that one match is nearly an hour and fifteen minutes long, it has quite the negative impact on the rest of the show. The men’s match makes up for it and the card is much better than worse, but they really, really need to stop with these shows getting close to (or over in Wrestlemania’s case) seven hours. It doesn’t matter how good it is. If you’re going three hours over the length of Wrestlemania X7, the time is going to cause a lot of problems. Anyway, good show, which could have been great with a big editing job.

Ratings Comparison

Chad Gable/Bobby Roode vs. Scott Dawson/Rezar

Original: D+

2020 Redo: D+

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Rusev

Original: C

2020 Redo: C-

Buddy Murphy vs. Hideo Itami vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Kalisto

Original: C+

2020 Redo: B-

Asuka vs. Becky Lynch

Original: B+

2020 Redo: B+

The Bar vs. Shane McMahon/The Miz

Original: D

2020 Redo: C

Sasha Banks vs. Ronda Rousey

Original: B+

2020 Redo: B

Women’s Royal Rumble

Original: B

2020 Redo: D+

AJ Styles vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: C-

2020 Redo: B+

Brock Lesnar vs. Finn Balor

Original: C+

2020 Redo: C+

Men’s Royal Rumble

Original: D

2020 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: D+

2020 Redo: B-

WOW. I was actually shocked by the original ratings of those Rumbles and the Styles vs. Bryan match. I’ve mellowed a lot since then as the show really isn’t that bad.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/01/28/royal-rumble-2019-i-almost-had-a-birthday-watching-this-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Summerslam 2020
Date: August 23, 2020
Location: Amway Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe

It’s finally time to try this out and yes it’s another Thunder Dome show, which may or may not mean anything to you if you’re reading this in 2273. Basically there are no fans live in the arena, but there are pictures of several of them scared to move because of all of the conditions WWE has included to allow them to be shown on screen. Other than that, we have two World Title matches and something we’ll never see coming, which kind of negates the idea of a surprise. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: US Title: MVP vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is defending and the rest of the Hurt Business is banned from ringside. A quick sunset flip gives Crews two and MVP wants a breather on the floor. Back in and MVP uses a distracted referee to get in a cheap shot but Crews is right back with a dropkick. MVP is ready for a charge in the corner though and sends Crews over the top and face first onto the steps for a nasty crash.

Back in and MVP misses a big running boot in the corner but he’s fine enough to crotch Crews on top. A superplex brings Crews back down with MVP slipping a bit on the fall before getting two. Crews is fine enough to clothesline MVP to the floor and that means a big running flip dive, which seems to hurt Crews’ back again. Back in and Crews wins a slugout before ripping off MVP’s nasal strip. That sets MVP off enough that he tries the Playmaker but Crews reverses into the Toss Powerbomb to retain at 6:35.

Rating: C. This could have been on any given Raw and that isn’t the most surprising thing. The bigger story here would seem to be Crews vs. Bobby Lashley down the line and letting Crews get the Summerslam win on the way there is a nice boost for him. Other than that, there isn’t much to see here, but it was just a Kickoff Show match.

Post match Lashley and Shelton Benjamin run out for the beatdown but Crews slips away.

The opening video presents Summerslam as a huge production, including the lights, camera action line. Each match gets a quick look as well.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending and has Sasha Banks in her corner. Asuka forearms Bayley in the shoulder to start and hits a running dropkick. The sliding dropkick misses but Asuka can get a seated Octopus hold. Thankfully this cuts off Cole’s explanation that the big difference between their careers is Asuka has won the Women’s Royal Rumble. Not that Asuka has never lost a singles match to Bayley, including beating her twice in the last month and a half, but their Women’s Royal Rumble record.

The hip attack sends Bayley to the floor and Asuka hits a jumping DDT from the steps to knock Bayley silly again. Back in and Bayley grabs a quick suplex for a breather and the stomping is on in the ropes. The Bayley to Belly gets two more so Asuka kicks Bayley in the head for the double knockdown. Another hip attack rocks Bayley and there’s the release German suplex to send Bayley flying. They head to the apron with Bayley dropping Asuka knees first, much to Banks’ delight.

Back in and Bayley gets two off a chop block, followed by something like an Indian Deathlock. That’s broken up so Bayley grabs another leglock with Asuka going to the ropes this time. Bayley goes up for the top rope elbow but Asuka pulls her into the cross armbreaker instead. Asuka lets go to kick at the screaming Banks though and they head outside with Asuka hitting Bayley in the face. Back in and Bayley grabs a rollup for a close two but Asuka’s running hip attack hits Banks by mistake. That’s enough for Bayley to small package Asuka to retain at 11:21.

Rating: B-. It was good for Bayley to win, even if it has no bearing on her Royal Rumble history. Bayley retaining again is interesting, though that would give you more of a reason to believe that Asuka is taking the other title later. Either way, they had a solid match here as they tend to do, as Asuka can have good matches with almost anyone. It was a good effort here and they even helped set up the other title match later.

Post match Bayley and Banks lay out Asuka again.

Dominik Mysterio asks Rey Mysterio to let him do this himself against Seth Rollins and not get involved. Rey agrees and they hug.

Recap of Retribution’s carnage.

Kevin Owens comes out for commentary, complete with a red tie.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Angel Garza/Andrade vs. Street Profits

The Profits are defending and Zelina Vega is here with the challengers. Ford flips over Andrade to start and hits a jumping clothesline. A jumping hurricanrana off the top freaks Vega out and Andrade is sent outside. Dawkins comes in for a double flapjack to Garza but Ford’s running flip dive to the floor is countered into a double powerbomb. Back in and Ford gets sent into the corner, allowing Garza to TAKE OFF HIS PANTS!

Andrade armbars Ford over the ropes, setting up the Alberto double stomp for two more. Ford avoids a charge and brings in Dawkins to clean house, including a spear to Andrade. It’s back to Ford, who is grazed by the basement dropkick to the head for two. Zelina gets on the apron but is knocked down in a hurry, leaving Ford to escape the Wing Clipper. The Cash Out into the (spinning) frog splash pins Garza to retain the titles at 7:49.

Rating: C. Another Raw level match here, though maybe a little bit better than that. I doubt this is over between the teams, because it’s not like there is anyone else for the Profits to defend against at the moment. The Owens inclusion was a little odd but he has enough of a story history with Vega and company to make it work.

Post match Owens congratulates the champs and announces the return of the KO Show tomorrow night, with Aleister Black as his guest.

Bayley and Sasha Banks don’t like Kayla Braxton’s questions. Banks knows she can beat Asuka, and Bayley knows it too. Tonight Asuka is tapping out and then next week they’re retaining the Tag Team Titles.

We recap Mandy Rose vs. Sonya Deville. They used to be best friends and then Sonya got sick of Mandy getting all of the attention and turned on her. Then Sonya cut her hair and challenged her to a hair vs. hair match, which was seemingly derailed by someone wanting to actually murder Sonya, so instead it’s No DQ, Loser Leaves WWE.

Mandy Rose vs. Sonya Deville

No DQ, Loser Leaves WWE. Mandy punches her in the face for an early knockdown and they head outside with Sonya being whipped into various things. A suplex onto the ramp drops Sonya again and Mandy dives off the announcers’ table with a clothesline. Mandy grabs a table but Sonya gets in a shot and takes it inside. Back in and Mandy misses a running knee, allowing Sonya to slap on a dragon sleeper.

Sonya grabs a triangle choke but Mandy is smart enough to stack her up for two to force the break. The trash talk is on but only causes Mandy to slap away. Now the knee gives Mandy two and they head back outside, with Mandy shouting about being the soccer mom. Mandy throws the chairs at Sonya’s head but walks into a pump kick instead. Back in and Mandy hits a pair of knees, followed by a third as she goes half Kenny Omega. Angel’s Wings plants Sonya and a fourth knee to the face finishes her off at 10:00.

Rating: D+. Yeah believe it or not, I’m not exactly getting behind the idea of a blonde bombshell who got all of the attention being called out for getting all of the attention. Sonya stole the show in the entire feud and while things got turned upside down this week (completely fair enough), I was really wanting to see how far Sonya can go after everything she has been doing lately. Or to see Mandy bald for some reason. The No DQ stuff changed almost nothing here.

Post match Sonya is devastated as Otis comes out to celebrate. He does the Caterpillar and Mandy fails completely in her attempt.

We recap Dominik Mysterio vs. Seth Rollins, which is fallout from Rollins going after Rey Mysterio, including taking his eye out twice. Dominik is here to fight for his dad’s honor in his debut. They’re making it a street fight to help Dominik out a little bit.

Seth Rollins vs. Dominik Mysterio

Street fight and Rollins, with Murphy, is in Rey Mysterio WCW inspired ring gear. Rey is here with Dominik to even things out. Dominik looks nervous to start and Rollins seems more interested in toying with him. Rollins even sticks his head out so Dominik can grab a headlock. Instead of punching Rollins in the face, Dominik grabs a headlock and is shoved down almost immediately. Some armdrags into a front flip have Rollins a little staggered so he slams Dominik down.

Rollins demands and receives a kendo stick from Murphy but Dominik is up with a dropkick. That means Rollins has to run from the kendo stick until Rollins catches him with some stomping back inside. The neck cranking goes on but Rollins lets go to yell at Rey. Dominik’s feeble comeback is cut off with the Sling Blade and Rollins puts the knee on his face. The chair is set up inside and Rollins tells “Papa” to come on. Dominik reverses the buckle bomb and grabs a tornado DDT for two.

The kendo stick shots have Rollins in trouble for a change but he crotches Dominik on top. That means the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two and Rollins wants his own stick. Dominik gets beaten down and Rollins calls for a table from Murphy. Rollins loads up said table in the corner but takes too long going up, allowing Dominik to hit a super Russian legsweep through the table for two. Dominik’s frog slash gets the same, plus a million versions of the same jokes about Eddie being his dad.

Dominik takes too long getting a chair and walks into a superkick, followed by a powerbomb. A bunch of kendo stick shots have Rey clutching his own chest and now we go old school with handcuffs. Before they go on, cue Rey’s wife to try to call this off but Rey stops her. Murphy comes in for the knee to Dominik and tries to take the eye out, finally drawing Rey in for the save.

Rollins and Murphy double team Rey and handcuff him to the middle rope. They both grab kendo sticks but turn to look at Rey’s wife instead. Since she’s on the stage and Rollins is at ringside (and since she can’t MOVE), Dominik makes the save. Something like a 619 sends Rollins into the barricade and there’s the regular version. Another frog splash hits knees though and Rollins makes Rey watch as he….just kind of holds Dominik. The Stomp finishes Dominik at 22:35.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure what to think here, other than it went WAY too long. The match itself was ok enough as Dominik has some skill and has clearly been trained well, but that doesn’t mean I want to watch this for twenty two minutes. It felt like a lot more of the same, with Rollins trying to be vicious but coming off as a heel wrestler instead of anything especially violent. This feud has gone on way too long and odds are we get a tag match next so they can keep trying to get the big emotional moment which hasn’t come yet. Dominik looked pretty good (all things considered), but not ready for Summerslam good.

Post match Rollins leaves the keys with Dominik and watches as he has to crawl over and free Mysterio.

Raw Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Sasha Banks

Banks, with Bayley in her corner, is defending. Asuka has a bad knee coming in and Banks goes straight for it in a smart move. Back up and Asuka hits a weakened version of the sliding forearm to put Banks on the floor. That means a leglock on the floor to even up the knees a bit, followed by a kick to the back for two on the champ. Asuka heads to the apron and Banks grabs a spinning powerbomb to the floor, freaking Bayley out in the process.

That’s good for nine so Banks kicks her in the chest for two more. Asuka pulls her down into an ankle lock but Banks rolls out in a hurry, sending Asuka onto the middle rope. That’s fine with Asuka, who hits a middle rope DDT for the slightly delayed two. The missile dropkick gets the same and Banks falls into the corner. Asuka tries to pull her out but Banks grabs a Codebreaker for two in a cool counter.

Banks misses her own frog splash and the Asuka Lock goes on but Banks flips backwards for two. Asuka has to let go and Banks gets the Bank Statement. She tries to flip into the center and gets switched into the Asuka Lock, which is broken again. Bayley gets on the apron and gets elbowed down, allowing Banks to try a rollup ala Bayley earlier. This time Asuka reverses into the Asuka Lock for the title at 11:31.

Rating: B. Better than the first match and I can always go with someone who learns from an earlier match. This made good sense after earlier and they had to do something to get some of the gold away from Bayley and Banks. The action was pretty hard hitting here and Banks works with Asuka better than Bayley, so this was a nice improvement over the opener and the best match of the night so far.

Banks is distraught post match and Bayley doesn’t know what to do.

We recap Drew McIntyre vs. Randy Orton for the Raw World Title. McIntyre won the title back at Wrestlemania and Orton has been on a roll in the last few months. This of course meant we needed Ric Flair to be involved because he has to be in on a big story a year. Anyway, McIntyre has worked his way to the top and doesn’t think much of Orton skating by on talent over the years. Orton on the other hand doesn’t think much of McIntyre at all and is taking the title because he can. Oh and he Punted Flair because it’s Flair.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Drew McIntyre

Drew is defending and Orton bails to the floor at the bell. After the stalling ensues, Orton goes back in, gets punched once, and heads outside again. The chase is on this time and Orton stomps away as Drew gets back in. Orton misses a pair of RKO attempts but the second one sends Drew outside for a breather. The champ gets back in again and unloads on Orton in the corner. Orton can’t hit the RKO for a third time but he can avoid a charge to send McIntyre shoulder first into the post.

McIntyre falls outside and Orton drops him hard onto the announcers’ table for a big crash. He does it again to make McIntyre’s back even worse and there’s a suplex off the table. That’s good for one back inside and we hit the chinlock. Orton starts stomping away at the ankle and leg but McIntyre gets in something like a Stunner to Orton’s knee. As a fan holding up a Twitter sign is replaced, Drew puts on a Figure Four in the middle of the ring.

Orton is in trouble but gets smart by pulling the referee in and poking McIntyre’s eye for the break. They get back up and slug it out with Orton still not being able to hit the RKO. McIntyre snaps off an overhead belly to belly and then does it a second time. A top rope clothesline drops Orton and McIntyre is fired up. McIntyre loads up a top rope superplex but gets dropped down into the Tree of Woe.

That doesn’t slow McIntyre down that much as he pulls himself up for a choke throw to put Orton back down. The Futureshock gets two and Orton’s head is busted open. McIntyre goes up top but misses a shot to the head, allowing Orton to hit the powerslam for two. The hanging DDT is countered and McIntyre hits the Glasgow Kiss.

They fall out to the floor together and Orton hits the hanging DDT on the way back in. Orton loads up the Punt but walks into a powerbomb. The Claymore is loaded up but Orton ducks, only to miss the RKO again. McIntyre grabs a backslide for the pin to retain at 24:38. Phillips: “Orton never saw it coming!”

Rating: B+. They took their time here and I got into it pretty quickly. I like the idea of having McIntyre win without some kind of a screwy ending and if that’s the only thing we didn’t see coming, it might be quite the upgrade. It was a very nice back and forth match and Summerslam main event worthy, so well done on living up to the hype.

Tomorrow: Keith Lee is on Raw.

We recap Braun Strowman vs. the Fiend. They have been feuding for months now with the Fiend reemerging from the swamp at Extreme Rules. During their fight, Alexa Bliss appeared and tried to convince Strowman to join Bray Wyatt again. Strowman said no, but it became clear that Strowman still thought something of Bliss, and maybe vice versa. Strowman said she meant nothing to him though and he even gorilla press slammed her on Smackdown. Strowman has had it with Wyatt and the Fiend so it is time to fight.

Smackdown World Title: The Fiend vs. Braun Strowman

Strowman is defending and falls count anywhere. Fiend is knocked down to start but comes right back with a release Rock Bottom. They head outside with Fiend sending him into various things and hitting Strowman in the ribs with a toolbox. Fiend loads up the announcers’ table but gets chokeslammed onto it for his efforts. A spear sends Fiend through the barricade and a shot with the steps makes it worse.

Back in and the running powerslam gives Strowman two, meaning it’s time to fight up the ramp. They go into the gorilla position with Fiend hitting Sister Abigail for two. Fiend pokes the eyes and takes it back to the stage, where he slithers over to Strowman. The Mandible Claw goes on near ringside but Strowman shoves him into the LED ring skirt.

Another running powerslam gives Strowman two back inside and frustration is setting in. Strowman goes to the toolbox and pulls out a box cutter so he can cut up the mat. Some of the wood is exposed but Fiend gets up and hits another Rock Bottom. Two Sister Abigails onto the wood makes Fiend champion again at 12:01.

Rating: C+. This was feeling big to start and then wound up being Strowman losing because he was stupid and took forever to set up….something while the supernatural monster was left laying there. Fiend winning was the only possible outcome here as there was nothing left for Strowman to do as the failed champion. Either way, it was better than I was expecting, but it still wasn’t great.

Post match ROMAN REIGNS returns and hits a spear to take Fiend down and hammer away. Reigns spears Strowman down too and shouts that Strowman isn’t a monster without him. He unloads on Strowman with chair shots and spears Fiend down again before shouting that the title was always his. I know supervillains are supposed to have weaknesses, but football players who played college ball in Georgia and use spears is as specific as I’ve ever heard. Also, Reigns was WAY more aggressive than usual here and felt as close to a heel as he’s been since the original Shield run. He might not have turned, but it wasn’t far off.

Overall Rating: C. This show was looking outright dreadful until Banks vs. Asuka (though I could see people liking Rollins vs. Mysterio) and the rest of the show bailed the first half out as much as it could have. Reigns being back is a great thing as Smackdown (and Raw for that matter) needs all of the star power it can get. It’s not a great show, but it jumps up in quality in the second half and that saved it from being a nightmare.

 

 

 

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Summerslam 2018
Date: August 19, 2018
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Jonathan Coachman

It’s the second biggest show of the year (I think) and that means we’re in for a stacked card. The big matches include Roman Reigns challenging Brock Lesnar for the Universal Title, AJ Styles defending the WWE Championship against Samoa Joe and, in the match that I think should close the show, Daniel Bryan vs. the Miz. Tonight has some promise so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Zelina Vega/Andrade Cien Almas vs. Rusev/Lana

Thankfully they waited a little longer before starting the first match this year, allowing some more fans to get into the arena. Last year was embarrassing looking but it’s a little better this time. The men start and it’s an early double tranquillo pose, earning Almas and Vega some Bulgarian roaring. We settle down to a RUSEV DAY chant and Rusev hitting a suplex. A missed charge sends Rusev shoulder first into the post and it’s an armbar to send us to a break.

Back with Almas getting two off a reverse tornado DDT. A second attempt is countered with a shove off the top and the hot tag brings in Lana. Vega has to come in as well and Lana kicks her down, setting up a Spinarooni of all things. A kick to the face cuts Vega off again but Lana stops to slap Almas, allowing Vega to roll her up for the pin at 6:55. They botched that one pretty badly as Vega was supposed to put her feet on the ropes but she’s so short that they couldn’t reach. Lana was barely struggling either and it didn’t look good.

Rating: D. I was really disappointed here as this could have been something very fun. What we got was a short match between the guys and then a bare bones match from the women. I don’t know if the stage got to Lana or what but this was the bad match that a lot of people have expected her to have. The finish was even worse though and made the match feel like a joke.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Drew Gulak

Gulak is challenging and everyone else is banned from ringside. Alexander has held the title since Wrestlemania and Gulak has been on a roll, making everyone tap out. Gulak takes him to the mat and then into the corner to start but it’s way too early for the Gulock (dragon sleeper). Instead Alexander rolls out and dropkicks Gulak down so it’s time to go to the floor. Back in and Alexander’s springboard is blocked with a big boot, followed by a neckbreaker onto the knee.

We take a break and come back with Gulak staying on the neck with a clothesline for two. Gulak cranks on the neck but Alexander is right back up with a bottom rope springboard Downward Spiral. Some right hands keep Gulak in trouble and Cedric followed him to the floor with a big flip dive.

Back in and Alexander catches him on the ropes, setting up a short form Gulock to really mess with the neck. A spinning elbow to the jaw gets Cedric out of trouble for the time being but Gulak smacks him in the face. Gulak reverses the Neuralizer into an ankle lock but gets reversed into a cradle. Back up and Cedric hits the C4 but Gulak turns it over into a rollup for two more. Another rollup gives Gulak two but that’s reversed into a stacked up rollup for the pin on Gulak at 10:42.

Rating: C+. They had a hot finish here with the rollups and I was actually surprised by the finish. That being said, I’m not wild on having Alexander keep the title and would have bet on Gulak picking up the belt here. There’s not much of a reason to keep the title on Alexander as he’s far from the most interesting guy in the world. At least the match was pretty good though.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. B Team

The B Team is defending and get taken down in the very early on with a dragon screw leg whip to Dallas. A Shatter Machine puts the illegal Axel down as well and it’s Dawson starting on in Dallas’ knee. Back from a break with Wilder staying on the knee and handing it back to Dawson, who gets kicked shoulder first into the post. Axel is still down from the Shatter Machine though and there’s no hot tag to be had.

Dallas’ knee is fine enough for the hanging swinging neckbreaker and now the hot tag brings Axel in. Axel cleans house and loads up the PerfectPlex but gets small packaged. The referee is with Dallas and Wilder though until Wilder snaps Dallas across the top. Dallas falls onto Axel and Wilder to turn the small package over for the pin on Dawson at 6:14.

Rating: D+. How can you not at least chuckle at these two schmucks? They’ve embraced the clueless putz characters and that’s all you can ask for. As ridiculous as they are, it’s not like the Raw tag division has anything else going on. Revival is a great team, but that doesn’t matter if they can’t get more than five minutes and a bunch of nothing opponents. This was the right call, which is better than I was expecting.

By the way, the total wrestling time on this year’s Kickoff Show: about 24 minutes, or just over half of last year’s. That’s a BIG improvement as there’s no need to have so much wrestling on a bonus feature before we get to the four hour pay per view.

The opening video features actor Terry Crews outside the arena, rhyming about what it means to be the best on the big stage. This was released earlier in the week.

There’s a big digital Empire State Building over the ring. That isn’t likely visible in the arena.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler is defending and has Drew McIntyre in his corner while Rollins has the freshly returned Dean Ambrose in his. The fans are very hot for Rollins here, especially BURN IT DOWN. Feeling out process to start with Seth being driven into the ropes but Dean is right there to cut Drew off. Back up and they run the ropes with Rollins nailing a hiptoss, sending Ziggler outside for a breather.

Seth follows him and it’s time for another big staredown. Rollins gets sent to the apron but stops to stare at Drew, allowing Ziggler to grab two off a neckbreaker. With Rollins seeming to favor his knee, Ziggler talks trash to Ambrose and then sends Rollins into the corner for a Flair Flip to the floor. Back in and the chinlock keeps Rollins in trouble for a good while. The comeback is cut off as Rollins grabs a vertical suplex over the top, only to fall out with Ziggler for a big crash.

Rollins hits a Sling Blade for two back inside and the middle rope Blockbuster gets two more. Ziggler rolls away from the threat of the frog splash so Rollins hits him with the suicide dive. The springboard clothesline sets up the ripcord knee for two and they’re both down for a minute. Ziggler’s sleeper is thrown off so they head to the apron with Ziggler saying this is it. Rollins gets shoved into the post and a jumping DDT drives him head first into the apron. That’s only good for a nine count as Rollins comes back in for the low superkick.

The frog splash hits knees though and Ziggler rolls him up for two more. Ziggler heads up top but Rollins is right there for a reverse superplex into a reverse inverted DDT (now that’s how you mix it up) and a near fall of his own. McIntyre sends Dean into the steps though, allowing Ziggler to hit the Zig Zag for the nearest fall yet. Dean is back up with Dirty Deeds to McIntyre and the bloody Rollins to avoid the superkick. The Stomp gives Rollins the title back at 22:01.

Rating: B. I know it won’t be, but I really could go for this feud ending already. It started a little over two months ago and feels like it’s been going on for a year now. At least Rollins has the title back and that’s all well and good, especially with the prospects of Ziggler and McIntyre being able to split up for good now. If nothing else, it’s nice to start the show with a good, long match for a change after last year took forever to get going.

The Bellas are here and are asked about their chances of appearing at Evolution. It turns into a list of plugs for their various projects before Nikki says they want to see Ronda Rousey win the Raw Women’s Title tonight. They’ll be ringside for the match tonight. And so it begins.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Bludgeon Brothers vs. New Day

New Day, Big E. and Xavier Woods here, are challenging after having won a tournament. Rowan runs Woods over to start and gets two each off a big boot and splash. It’s off to the fists around the head crush, followed by a pumphandle backbreaker to keep Woods down. Woods finally kicks Harper to the floor and makes the hot tag to Big E., who drops to the floor to throw some suplexes.

Back in and the Warrior Splash gets two on Harper, who comes right back with the Michinoku Driver. The double spinebuster doesn’t work though and Woods dives over the top onto Rowan. Everything breaks down and Big E. is sent into the steps, though the Brothers look a little banged up. They’re fine enough to hit the double spinebuster for two on Big E. with Woods making the save and getting the tag. Kofi gets taken down so Rowan eats the Big Ending on the floor.

A blind tag brings in Big E. but Harper stuns him with a superkick on the apron. Big E. tries the release Rock Bottom off the apron into the Codebreaker from Woods but the timing is off and it’s more like Harper just landing on Woods. Harper is fine enough to roll away from Woods’ top rope elbow so Woods hits it on the floor instead. The pain is immense but Woods throws him back in for the tag to Big E. UpUpDownDown is imminent but Rowan uses the mallet for the DQ at 9:36.

Rating: C+. They were getting somewhere before the ending to set up a rematch either on Smackdown or in the Cell. It’s a good idea to make the Brothers seem vulnerable against a top team like New Day, who couldn’t quite finish them off. At the moment the Smackdown tag team division is all of four teams so it’s a good idea to not change the titles just yet, along with keeping this match going for another month. Nice match, with an understandable ending.

Jon Stewart is here.

We recap Braun Strowman vs. Kevin Owens, which started back in June. Strowman threw him off a ladder at Money in the Bank and then won the briefcase, so Owens tried to be nice to him. Then Strowman destroyed his car, threw him in a portable toilet and off of a cage, meaning it’s time for a rematch with the briefcase on the line.

Money in the Bank Briefcase: Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman

Strowman is defending and can lose the briefcase by any means. The bell rings and Owens is knocked into the corner a few seconds later, followed by the run around the floor to shoulder him down. Strowman has so much fun that he does it again and a superkick just annoys him. A chokeslam onto the ramp knocks Owens silly and the running powerslam ends him at 1:56. Total and complete squash.

There was a Be A Star rally earlier in the week.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match. Becky Lynch beat Carmella to earn a spot but then Charlotte returned and did the same thing, earning her own shot. Charlotte and Becky then got in a bit of a passive aggressive fight over Becky being jealous of Charlotte being added. Fair enough, but WWE loves itself some triple threats.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Carmella vs. Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Carmella is defending and gets double teamed to start. In a smart move, she slaps Becky in the back of the head and blames Charlotte. The wedge doesn’t last long as Becky hiptosses Carmella to the floor and tries an early Disarm-Her on Charlotte. That goes nowhere as Charlotte escapes but gets pulled to the floor. Carmella sends Becky into the steps and reminds us that she is in fact the champion.

Back in and we hit the chinlock on Charlotte for a good while as Graves sings the champ’s praises. Becky has to be knocked off the apron, allowing Charlotte to start her comeback with the chops. Some suplexes make it even worse but Becky is back in with a double missile dropkick. Charlotte gets knocked outside and there’s the Bexploder to the champ. She crotches Becky on top though and gets two off a loose super hurricanrana. Charlotte comes back in with a spear to take them both down for two each and grabs a Walls of Jericho of all things on Carmella.

The Figure Four goes on instead but Becky makes the save with a guillotine legdrop. Carmella is back up and sends Becky outside for a suicide dive, only to have Charlotte miss the corkscrew moonsault (she slapped Carmella and completely missed Becky) to put them bot down. Back in and Carmella has to break up the Disarm-Her, followed by a superkick for two on Becky. Charlotte gets knocked to the floor and the Disarm-Her goes on, only to have Carmella grab the rope. The hold is slapped on again but Charlotte runs in with Natural Selection to Becky for the pin and the title at 14:35.

Rating: C+. Much better than I was expecting here and they better turn Becky heel after that ending. Thankfully they took the title off of Carmella, but at this point either she or Charlotte has been champion since November. They need some fresh blood in there, which hopefully is a ticked off Lynch.

Post match Carmella leaves so Becky and Charlotte can hug, only for Becky to turn on Charlotte and beat the fire out of her to a HUGE YES chant. Becky throws her over the table, leaving Charlotte to take a YOU DESERVE IT chant. That was the only way to go as A, Becky has a legitimate complaint about Charlotte being put into the match and stealing her title and B, there isn’t anyone else for Charlotte to fight.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match. AJ Styles has been champion since November, becoming the longest reigning World Champion in Smackdown history. Joe signed the contract to face him, partially because there was no one left aside from maybe Miz. After the match was set, Joe started talking about how AJ was sacrificing his family to be champion. AJ tried to keep things calm, but Joe read a letter supposedly from AJ’s wife Wendy, saying Joe was completely right. In other words, AJ isn’t happy.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Joe is challenging and even introduces AJ’s wife and daughter at ringside. It’s a feeling out process to start as AJ is a little more calm than (erg, especially after Joe’s comments) he should be here, even as the fans chant TNA. AJ grabs a headlock to slow Joe down but a heavy shoulder cuts him off. Some leg kicks have AJ in even more trouble but he’s right back with some forearms. The sliding forearm sends Joe outside and AJ tries to follow him, only to get kicked in the knee to take him off the apron.

A hard suicide dive sends AJ into the announcers’ table and one heck of a clothesline takes his head off back inside. We hit the chinlock, which makes you wonder why Joe doesn’t turn around just a hair and make it the Koquina Clutch instead. AJ gets up and knocks Joe’s block off with a right hand to the floor, followed by the slingshot forearm. Joe charges into an enziguri and the Phenomenal Blitz sets up another running forearm. The moonsault into a reverse DDT gets two on Joe and AJ puts him on top.

That doesn’t go well for the champ, who gets shoved down for a middle rope knee to a standing AJ for two more. The running big boot into the backsplash gets the same but AJ is right back with the fireman’s carry backbreaker. AJ is limping a bit and misses the Phenomenal Forearm, allowing Joe to snap him over with the powerslam for two more. A one armed Styles Clash gives AJ the same and they’re both down. Back up and they slug the heck out of it until a Pele sends Joe into the corner.

AJ makes the mistake of charging into the release Rock Bottom but is still able to put on the Calf Crusher. Joe’s solution: slam AJ’s head into the mat over and over. Joe slips over into the Koquina Clutch but AJ gets his foot on the ropes. It’s Muscle Buster time but AJ forearms him in the head. That’s fine with Joe, who hits one of the loudest enziguris I’ve ever heard to knock AJ outside. Joe sends him into the steps and grabs the mic. He tells Wendy that AJ isn’t coming home but he’ll be her new daddy. A suddenly bloody AJ tackles Joe off the table and through the barricade, followed by a chair to the back for the DQ at 22:46.

Rating: A-. You have to imagine that the Cell awaits these two and for once, the story would seem to fit that. AJ being able to do whatever he wants to Joe fits, but it would also seem to play much more into Joe’s hands. Anyway, of course these two had a great match because that’s all they know how to do. They were beating the fire out of each other and I want to see it again, which is the sign of a well done match. Really good stuff here, as expected.

Post match the beating continues until Wendy says that’s enough. AJ goes over to his family and his incredibly cute daughter says “daddy you’re bleeding”. AJ apologizes and hugs her before walking away with his family. Joe is TICKED as he leaves.

Here’s Elias to plug his album and talk about how awesome his songs are. He even has a new song, which he’s debuting right here in New York City. And then his guitar breaks. That’s too much for Elias, who throws the pieces around and storms off without saying anything.

Miz runs into the B Team and says if Bryan had followed his example, he might have lived off of Miz’s success like they had. For old times sake, they can fetch his limo for the celebration after. Actually they have their own celebrating to do because they’re the B Team and the B stands for Daniel Bryan. Dallas likes Miz and Mrs. (which he pronounces Mers) but they have their own show: Total Fellas. Dallas: “But with a B! Total Bellas!” Miz is stupefied as they leave.

We recap the Miz vs. Daniel Bryan. This one is over eight years in the making as Bryan came into WWE as Miz’s NXT rookie, despite being a top independent star. Bryan eventually defeated Miz a few times but they went on their own paths. Miz won a WWE Title while Bryan became the top star in the company, only to have injuries take him away for a few years. Now he’s back and healthy though, meaning it’s time for these two to FINALLY have the big match on the grand stage.

They’ve done a great job of setting up the culture clash here as Bryan is all about the love of wrestling and Miz is about becoming a star. Those worlds don’t jive and it’s made their feud that much better. The crowd reaction should be interesting, though Bryan is going to be the biggest face that ever faced around here.

The Miz vs. Daniel Bryan

Maryse is in the front row with a baby carriage. Miz hides in the corner for a bit before scoring with some YES Kicks. The running dropkick connects but Bryan grabs him by the throat and hammers away. The real YES Kicks rock Miz and a big one to the chest puts him down. Miz gets in a knee to the ribs and the surfboard goes on. Of course Bryan knows how to get out of that and starts kicking at Miz’s legs.

The REAL surfboard goes on and Bryan even bends back to get two off a bridge. Back up and Miz catches him with a hard clothesline, followed by a cravate with bonus trash talk. Miz starts firing off some knees to the head but Bryan is right back with right hands of his own. The moonsault over Miz sets up the running clothesline and the running corner dropkicks connect. A backdrop sends Miz to the floor and Bryan follows with two boots through the ropes and a top rope clothesline.

Back in and Miz gets caught in the Tree of Woe, which of course means more YES Kicks. One heck of a top rope belly to back suplex puts Miz down for two more but he’s right back with the short DDT. With Miz’s chest blood red, he fires off some NO Kicks of his own, which bring Bryan back to his feet. Bryan dragon screw whips Miz’s leg and hits the big kick to the head but can’t get the YES Lock. Instead a catapult into the post sets up the Skull Crushing Finale for two but Miz charges into another kick for another two.

They head to the apron with Bryan firing off kicks until the last one hits the post. That means a Figure Four back inside and Bryan is in big trouble. As usual, the solution is to punch Miz in the face and then turn the hold over. Miz lets it go and tries the Finale but Bryan kicks him in the back (the leg shouldn’t be able to do that) and goes with the heavy elbows to the head.

The YES Lock goes on and Bryan punches Miz in the back of the head as the aggression continues to come out. Miz makes the rope though and bails to the floor, only to get kneed in the head. That knocks Miz right in front of Maryse, who hands him something. Whatever it is knocks Bryan silly when he tries a suicide dive, giving Miz the pin at 23:30.

Rating: B+. I liked this one as much as I expected to and the ending does set up a rematch. You have to imagine that Bryan is sticking around given that finish as there’s a wide open door for the feud to continue. It was a nice, long match and got the attention that it deserved, but it didn’t feel like the final match throughout. The ending takes care of that though and everything is fine.

Replays confirm the object, with Graves going into full Bobby Heenan mode to talk his way around the cheating.

Video on Undertaker vs. HHH for Super Show-Down in their final match. To be fair they haven’t been ridiculous with the plugging tonight.

Baron Corbin vs. Finn Balor

THE DEMON IS BACK! FOR THIS MATCH??? This is the rubber match after Corbin started being mean to Balor for being small. It’s been a horrible story but the Demon makes up for some of it. Cole gets his Demon history wrong, saying it last appeared two years ago. It was last year Cole. You called the match.

The fans are VERY pleased and Corbin is told he has to face him. The bell rings and it’s the shotgun dropkick into the Sling Blade to put Baron on the floor in the smoke. Balor adds a flip dive and it’s another Sling Blade on the floor. Back in and Balor hits a top rope double stomp to the back, followed by the Coup de Grace for the pin at 1:29. NOW THAT’S MORE LIKE IT!

Bryan is ticked off when Brie finally remembers that they’re married and comes in to see him in his moment of need. He calls his comeback a bust but she gives him a pep talk which seems to work well enough.

US Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jeff Hardy

Nakamura is defending after taking the title from Hardy last month. Feeling out process to start and of course Nakamura is over like free beer in a frat house in New York. Nakamura dodges a few early shots and tells him to COME ON. Jeff does exactly the same and sends Nakamura into four buckles in a row. That earns him a quick takedown and Nakamura slaps on a chinlock.

Nakamura hammers on him a bit more until Hardy, to the tune of a BROTHER NERO chant, comes back up with a Sling Blade. An atomic drop sets up the legdrop between the legs and a basement dropkick gets two. Jeff slips out of the reverse exploder but the slingshot dropkick is countered into Nakamura sitting him on the top. The running knee misses though and Jeff gets two off a Whisper in the Wind.

Nakamura is fine enough to catch him with another kick to the head, followed by the sliding knee for two. Kinshasa is countered into a failed Twist of Fate attempt but Hardy is ready for the low blow. Now the Twist of Fate sets up the Swanton Bomb for a delayed two as Nakamura grabs the bottom rope. A second Twist of Fate sends Nakamura bailing to the apron, so Jeff climbs the post and Swantons the apron because he’s that freaking crazy. Back in and the Kinshasa finishes whatever is left of Hardy at 10:55.

Rating: C. I have no idea how Hardy is still walking and I don’t think he does either most of the time. The match was fine enough and Hardy gave it a run but Nakamura needed this way more than Hardy did. If nothing else Hardy already has Randy Orton sitting around for their big pay per view match so the loss was the only option here. Not a bad match, but nothing great, especially on a long shot.

Post match Orton comes out, smacks himself in the head, and leaves without even getting in the ring. Ok then.

We recap Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss. Rousey was about to win the Raw Women’s Title last month but Bliss interfered for a DQ and cashed in her briefcase to win the title. Bliss then made Rousey snap and got her suspended for a month. Rousey’s reward: a match for the title tonight.

Raw Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss

Rousey is challenging and before the match, here’s Natalya in the same jacket her dad wore at Summerslam 1990. Bliss comes out and sneers at the Bella Twins, who are sitting in the front row. Rousey now has eye paint and her name on her shorts as she does the power walk to the ring. Bliss hides in the corner to start (smart) and a single right hand puts her on the floor. More stalling ensues so Rousey even turns her back and sits down so Bliss can come in with no problem.

Rousey closes her eyes and Bliss grabs a chinlock, meaning it’s time for the scary Ronda face. The hold is broken (Bliss: “No no no no no!” Rousey: “YES!”) and there’s the swinging Samoan drop. A chase lets Bliss get in a forearm and Rousey is just made angrier. Bliss gets flipped on her face and Rousey unloads in the corner, followed by some judo throws. Another swinging Samoan drop (Rousey: “ARE YOU READY???”) connects and it’s armbar time. The arm is twisted in a variety of angles (including Bliss popping it in and out of joint) and one hard crank makes Bliss tap at 4:39.

Rating: C+. What do you want me to say? That was exactly what it should have been as Rousey should be able to destroy Bliss in short order. I’m not sure who is supposed to take the title off of Rousey, but if she can hold it until Wrestlemania (which she likely will), there’s a heck of a dream match to be had with Charlotte. Total squash here and, again, Rousey looked like she’s been doing this for years.

Post match Natalya comes in for the celebration and the Bellas join them because reasons. Rousey goes into the crowd and kisses her husband for the nice moment.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns (again). As is usually the case, Reigns is whining about how Lesnar is lazy and doesn’t like the fans so he should get another title shot. Also as usual, the fans don’t seem to buy it and Reigns isn’t likely to be cheered here. There are a few options for the finish and that makes the ending a little more interesting than usual.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Brock is defending and gets no reaction (That HAD to be muted. No New York crowd has ever been that quiet). Hang on though as here’s Strowman with the briefcase. He’s not cashing in behind anyone’s back because he’ll be waiting on the winner. The bell rings and Reigns hits two Superman Punches and a pair of spears but the third is countered into a guillotine choke. That’s broken up with a spinebuster but Lesnar puts it right back on.

Another spinebuster breaks the hold again and they’re both down. Lesnar takes his gloves off and it’s Suplex City time. Three straight German suplexes draw a YOU BOTH SUCK chant and Reigns can barely stand. Reigns is back up with a missed charge that hits Strowman so Lesnar goes outside and gives Braun an F5 on the floor. With Reigns back in, Lesnar beats on Strowman with the briefcase, which he then throws from ringside all the way to the entrance, breaking part of the LED board. Strowman gets chaired down but Lesnar walks into a spear to make Reigns champion at 6:16.

Rating: C+. I know they repeat moves and I know the ending isn’t the most popular move in the world, but these two know how to make the matches feel big. I was wanting to see what happened and that’s more than you can say about a lot of matches. Reigns finally getting rid of Lesnar is a good thing, but I really wish they would just get rid of the briefcase already so it doesn’t have to be around.

Reigns poses to end the show with no cash-in.

Overall Rating: A-. That was a heck of a show and above all else it was about the pacing. They did a GREAT job of making this show stay at a steady pace with some hot matches and then a quick match to let the fans get back into it. That took place throughout the night and did wonders for the show, which never felt like it dragged. Compare this to Wrestlemania, which felt like it dragged every few minutes.

On top of that, the wrestling was solid all night long with good to very good wrestling, logical booking decisions and stuff being set up for the future. This was a very entertaining night and notice the crowd not taking the show over at all. That’s a nice change of pace and made the evening that much more enjoyable. Really good stuff here and the best WWE pay per view in a long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam 2017
Date: August 20, 2017
Location: Barclays Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T., John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

It’s finally time for one of the biggest shows of the year as WWE takes over New York City all over again. This time around the big main event is a four way for the Universal Title with Brock Lesnar defending against Roman Reigns, Braun Strowman and Samoa Joe. The rest of the card is too deep to break down in short order so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Hardy Boyz/Jason Jordan vs. Miz/Miztourage

The idea here is that Miz wants to be defending his Intercontinental Title against Jason Jordan but is stuck in this for reasons that aren’t clear. The section opposite the hard camera is MAYBE ten percent full because we’re about an hour and a half away from the start of the pay per view.

Jeff takes Axel into the corner to start and hands it off to Jordan to work on the arm. Dallas comes in and gets the same treatment, sending the Miztourage outside for a breather as we take a break (with empty sections of seats being shown on camera). Back with Jeff in trouble with Miz hammering away and working on the arm.

Matt comes in and throws some right hands but the Twist of Fate (with Matt shouting TWIST OF FATE) is broken up. Miz gets in some YES Kicks but gets sent into the corner, setting up the hot tag to Jordan. The suplexes send the Miztourage flying as everything breaks down. Jordan hits the running shoulder in the corner to Axel but Miz makes a blind tag, setting up the Skull Crushing Finale to put Jordan away at 10:31.

Rating: C-. Ridiculous looking non-crowd aside, not much of a match here. In theory you would have Miz lose the fall to Jordan here to set up the title match but it wouldn’t shock me if they had Miz beat him and then set it up anyway. This match didn’t need to happen and only served as a way to have some of these names on the card.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Neville vs. Akira Tozawa

Tozawa is defending after winning the title on Monday. The crowd is looking far better already with the section opposite the hard camera now mostly full. Neville, in white trunks for a change, gets knocked outside so Tozawa can do his shouting. Tozawa follows him out but gets sent into the LED apron as we take a break.

Back with Neville throwing on a chinlock until Tozawa throws him outside for a suicide dive. A hard belly to back suplex drops Neville and an Octopus Hold has him in even more trouble. Neville makes the ropes and cuts off a charge with an enziguri, only to get kicked down as well to put them back to even. Back up and Tozawa rocks Neville with a right hand but it’s still too early for the backsplash. The superplex is broken up but the backsplash hits raised knees. The Red Arrow gives Neville the title back at 11:47.

Rating: C. And that would makes them 2-2 in 50/50 booking on the Kickoff Show so far. Neville lost the title on Monday and gets it back on Monday for whatever reason, despite having no one left to defend the thing against. I’m sure this is going to thrill the fans so far, now that they’re at least in the arena.

Here’s Elias to sing two songs, one of which insults Brooklyn in general and the other of which insults local singers. No match or anything but this is a thing that happened.

Kickoff Show: Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. New Day

New Day is defending with Big E. and Woods in the ring. Before the match, Kofi (in Red Lantern inspired gear) talks about New Day’s history in Brooklyn, which is the first place they sang to the crowd and the birthplace of Francesca. Woods forearms Jimmy down to start and snaps off some rights and lefts in the corner. A raised boot cuts him off though and we take a break.

Back with Woods fighting out of a chinlock before coming up with a dropkick to Jey. Jimmy pulls Big E. off the apron though and it’s a Death Valley Driver into the corner for two. A modified Demolition Decapitator gets the same and we hit the chinlock. Back up with Woods getting in a faceplant for the tag off to Big E. as house is cleaned in a hurry. The Warrior Splash hits Jimmy and Big E. powerbombs Woods onto him for good measure.

In a real twist, Woods puts Big E. on his shoulders for a splash. JBL: “That’s what you’ve come to expect from the New Day!” A move they’ve never done before? Jey comes in off a hot tag and a double spinebuster gets two on Big E. It’s back to Woods who sends Jimmy into Big E. for a Rock Bottom/Backstabber combination and a near fall. Everything breaks down with the twins being sent outside for a dive from Woods, only to have Big E.’s stopped by a superkick.

The Superfly Splash gets two on Xavier but he’s back up with a Koji Clutch on Jey. A Shining Wizard gets two more and the Midnight Hour plants Jey with Jimmy diving in at the last second for the save. Woods charges at Jey, who launches him over the top into a Samoan drop on the floor. Big E. spears Jey through the ropes, only to have the Big Ending broken up by a blind tag. Five superkicks and a double Superfly Splash gives us new champions at 19:09.

Rating: B+. Heck of a match here as the three people/teams who won during the week go to 0-3 on the Kickoff Show. I have no idea what the point is in putting the titles back on the Usos as they cleaned out the “division” in recent months, pretty much leaving New Day alone as a good face team. Breezango barely wrestles anymore and we’ve done the two of them vs. the Usos, but that’s never stopped WWE before.

We get a KFC ad featuring various people auditioning to be the next Colonel Sanders. This cuts to the arena where Shawn Michaels comes out in a sleeveless Sanders outfit, dances around, slides over the announcers’ table, and nothing else. This is one of the most random things I’ve ever seen.

The opening video looks at every match under the slogan Go Big.

No pyro again, but let me introduce you to the ridiculous amount of commentary teams and all their equipment to broadcast live in various languages.

John Cena vs. Baron Corbin

Cena cost Corbin his Money in the Bank cash-in on Monday. For a change of pace, Cena slides to the floor and grabs JBL’s hat while saying Corbin is shaken up. Back in and Cena’s headlock is broken up with some knees to the ribs. Corbin’s slide underneath the ropes into a clothesline gets two and it’s time to yell at the referee.

A World’s Strongest Slam gets two and triggers a WHERE’S YOUR BRIEFCASE chant. That earns Cena a chokebreaker as this is mostly one sided so far. Cena fights out of a superplex with a tornado DDT but the AA is broken up. Deep Six gives Corbin two but Cena comes right back with the Attitude Adjustment for the fast pin at 10:18.

Rating: D. I don’t remember the last time I said this about a Cena match but this sucked. This was Cena getting beaten up for eight minutes and then coming back with a single AA for the pin (which NEVER happens). I don’t know if Corbin ran over Vince’s dog or something but he’s been crushed in the last week for no apparent reason. This was really odd and a big letdown, at least partially due to time.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Natalya vs. Naomi

Natalya is challenging after winning an elimination match last month. Naomi starts fast and knocks her outside, meaning it’s time to shout a lot. Back in and the champ’s leg gets snapped over the top rope and then over the turnbuckle for good measure. A suplex gives Natalya two, followed by a small package to give Naomi the same.

Back up and Natalya blasts her with a clothesline, followed by a Michinoku Driver for two more. The discus clothesline drops Naomi again but she comes back with a Russian legsweep. Naomi declares it GLOW TIME and does her dancing kicks (the ones that make almost no contact) but Natalya pulls her down to the mat instead. Back up and the reverse Rings of Saturn is reversed into the Sharpshooter for the surprise tap out at 10:49.

Rating: C-. Natalya looked far better out there but sweet goodness this division is getting less and less interesting all the time. The longer we wait for Charlotte and Becky Lynch to be in the title picture, the worse this division seems, mainly because it feels like a big waste of time. This match should have been on the Kickoff Show or not on the show whatsoever, but that might mean someone doesn’t make the card and that would just be unforgivable.

There’s no Carmella appearance.

We recap Big Cass vs. Big Show. Cass turned on Enzo Amore for running his mouth too much (gee I’m stunned) so Enzo brought in Show to help deal with him. Tonight Enzo is locked in a shark cage and Show’s hand is broken due to an attack by Cass.

Big Cass vs. Big Show

Enzo runs his mouth before the match and sucks up to Brooklyn, furthering his status as my least favorite person in the company. I don’t think I need to explain to you why Enzo is really annoying but he’s been even more so lately. Show slugs away with his left hand as Enzo runs his mouth about how we’re going to work tonight while dancing in the cage, causing it to rattle loudly. Show hurts his hand on a missed Vader Bomb as Enzo is now jumping up and down.

Cass hammers on the hand and grabs an armbar for some psychology. The fans think this is boring as Show fights up with a left handed chokeslam for two. Cass knocks him down again and Enzo is taking his pants off. He pulls out some hidden oil and covers himself with it, allowing him to slip through the bars. Enzo gets down so Cass kicks him in the head but the big boot only gets two on Show. A second big boot sets up the Empire Elbow for the pin on Show at 10:28.

Rating: D. I don’t remember the last time I couldn’t stand someone as much as I can’t stand Enzo. Stephanie maybe? Cass winning helps a lot here and hopefully he can now move on to ANYTHING else. He looked good in his win and now he can move on to a fresh feud. Show is actually really acceptable in this role as he’s just putting people over on the big stage and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Daniel Bryan comes in to see Kurt Angle to say he thinks Smackdown will steam the show. Bryan: “It’s true, it’s true.” Angle thinks Raw will be better and starts a YES chant. This turns into one heck of a YES/NO battle until both guys get winded.

Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Not much of a story here as Rusev wanted competition and Orton answered him. Rusev jumps Orton during the entrance and beats the heck out of him before the bell. Orton says he can go and it’s an RKO for the pin at 9 seconds.

That right there is the perfect example of why I can’t stand these huge cards. This is obviously, and I do mean obviously, a case of cutting something for time. Why is it being cut for time? It’s so we could have a Cruiserweight Title rematch and a six man rematch on the Kickoff Show. Neither match was good and both matches pretty much advanced nothing (the Cruiserweight Title match actually took us back in time) but they ate up time that could have gone to this match, which could have been interesting. Instead Rusev looks like an idiot and the match barely exists. Just don’t put someone on the card. They’ll be ok.

Sasha Banks is coming to the ring when she runs into Bayley, who gets booed while wishing Bayley good luck.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Alexa Bliss

Banks is challenging as a replacement for an injured Bayley. They brawl into the corner with the fans booing the heck out of Sasha. Bliss hits the hardest right hand she’s ever thrown but gets caught with a crossbody for two. Banks gets caught in the corner and faceplanted down to the mat. The New York fans are of course pleased with the woman from Boston getting beaten up, including having Bliss stand on her hair.

Alexa chokes in the corner and hits some double knees to the back. Some more choking ensues but Banks flips her out of the corner for a breather. Sasha makes her comeback with some clotheslines and a dropkick. Bliss tries a sunset flip out of the corner, only to have Sasha flip her backwards and head first into the buckles.

The Bank Statement goes on but it’s way too close to the ropes. Bliss takes her outside and sends her hard into the barricade, possibly injuring Sasha’s shoulder. Banks is back in at nine so Bliss is right on the arm, followed by Twisted Bliss for two. Some shots to the shoulder break up another Bank Statement, only to have Banks grab it again for the tap and the title at 13:17.

Rating: B-. Bliss did most of the work in the match and looked far better than I ever would have believed just a few months ago. This run has turned her into a completely acceptable worker, which isn’t what you would have expected. Banks winning is the right call long term, but they did a pretty lame job of building the match towards the finish. Still though, best thing on the show by a few miles so far.

We see the Shawn Michaels KFC bit again.

Long recap of Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt. Bray seemed to think that Balor was a false idol and promised to destroy him. Wyatt beat him this past Monday and then poured “blood” over him for some extra effect. Balor then said that Bray had his demons, but he did too. I think you know what that means.

Bray Wyatt vs. Finn Balor

After Bray’s full entrance, a voice starts singing He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands. That means the Demon King returns for the first time since last Summerslam to easily the reaction of the night. Finn crawls around and Bray takes an early breather on the still smoky floor. Back in and Balor hammers away, kicking Bray right back to the floor. Balor jumps over him in the corner so Bray leans over backwards for a scary look of his own.

That’s fine with Finn who sends him outside for a flip dive but it’s too early for the Coup de Grace. A suplex onto the floor knocks Balor silly though and we hit the chinlock for a bit. Balor pops back up and knocks him outside for a kick from the apron, followed by a Sling Blade back inside. Bray boots him in the face for two and declares that he has him. Balor gets in the shotgun dropkick against the barricade and throws him back inside for a quick Coup de Grace at 9:42 in another weak finish.

Rating: C+. As has been the case all night (and ever for the most part), it’s such a waste of a match to do it once on Monday and then again on Sunday. Why should I care that Balor won here when Bray already beat him earlier in the week? Either way, this was hardly a great return for Balor, who was the most obvious winner in the world here. Bray loses on the big stage, again, and it’s time to start his cycle all over again.

We recap Cesaro/Sheamus vs. Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins, which has very little to do with Cesaro/Sheamus. Ambrose and Rollins were tired of getting double teamed and teased getting back together for weeks. It FINALLY happened earlier this week and they were granted an immediate shot at the Tag Team Titles.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Sheamus/Cesaro vs. Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins

Sheamus and Cesaro are defending. Ambrose headlocks Sheamus to start and it’s a blind tag from Rollins to set up a knee drop. A dropkick staggers Cesaro and the champs are knocked to the floor without too much effort. Sheamus pulls Dean outside for a Brogue Kick though and Seth gets slammed on the floor for good measure.

Seth grabs a Blockbuster for a breather but hang on a second as Cesaro is running into the crowd. He grabs a beach ball that a fan was batting around and rips it to shreds, drawing a heck of a YES chant. I certainly love him a lot more now. Cesaro suplexes Seth down for two but seems to have tweaked his knee.

Rollins gets taken outside for a double beating, only to have Ambrose come off the top with the elbow to put everyone down. Back in and the champs are clotheslined over the top, setting up the double suicide dives. A Hart Attack with a Sling Blade (not a Blockbuster Cole) gets two on Cesaro and the rebound lariat puts him down again. Sheamus gets caught on top for a superplex with Rollins tagging himself in for a frog splash and a near fall with Cesaro making the save.

Cesaro breaks up the double bomb out of the corner and Dirty Deeds is countered into the Sharpshooter. Dean is almost in the ropes but Cesaro switches to a Crossface in the middle of the ring. Since that’s not going to work, it’s a powerbomb/top rope clothesline combination for two instead. White Noise is loaded up but Seth hurricanranas Cesaro off the top into Sheamus for the crazy save. A jumping knee to the face knocks Sheamus into Dirty Deeds for the pin and the titles at 18:35.

Rating: B. Heck of a match here with the ending looking great. That ending was a great touch as the Shield guys worked so well together. I’m not usually a fan of having two guys put together to become champions but it helps to have such a strong history between them. Now all they need is Roman as a surprise and things should be great all over again.

We recap Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles for the US Title. They’ve traded the title in recent months but Owens blames his recent loss on bad refereeing. This meant Shane McMahon was appointed as guest referee, so Owens started bringing up Shane’s history as a crooked referee and his issues with AJ. The question is will Shane screw someone over and who will it be.

US Title: Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles

AJ is defending with Shane McMahon as guest referee. Owens jumps him at the bell and hammers away with AJ’s comeback being cut off without much effort. The Cannonball gets two and Owens yells at Shane. A chinlock and backbreaker get two more on the champ but AJ says bring it. Styles wins a slugout and hits a belly to back faceplant for two but can’t follow up.

Back up and AJ manages the Phenomenal Forearm, only to hit Shane by mistake. That means there’s no one to count the Pop Up Powerbomb so Owens yells at Shane. As you might expect, AJ gets back up and knocks Shane to the floor by mistake. The Calf Crusher goes on and Owens taps to no avail.

Everyone gets back in and AJ forearms Owens down, only to get caught in the spinning superplex for two. AJ comes right back with the Styles Clash for a close two. Owens grabs the Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin but AJ’s foot was on the ropes and Shane calls it off. That means an argument and Shane shoves Owens into a rollup for two. The Pele sets up the Phenomenal Forearm and a second Styles Clash retains the title at 17:25.

Rating: B. This was too much about Shane and they’re not exactly being subtle about the upcoming Owens vs. McMahon match. AJ retaining is the right call here as there’s no need to put it back on Owens if he’s going to be feuding with Shane in the coming weeks. It wasn’t quite the blow away match I was expecting but it was a good, back and forth fight and a definitive ending, which is the most important thing.

Some fans won a sweepstakes and got to go to the show.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match. Jinder Mahal won the title in May in a huge upset and has continued to defy his critics ever since. Shinsuke Nakamura became #1 contender by pinning John Cena clean. There’s also no Baron Corbin to cash-in his Money in the Bank briefcase any longer.

Smackdown World Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Jinder is defending and Nakamura is played to the ring by a live violinist. The threat of some kicks brings Mahal close enough to grab a wristlock, only to have Nakamura spin out and send Mahal outside. Nakamura says bring it on so Mahal gets back inside, only to get caught with Good Vibrations. Shinsuke is getting a little too comfortable so the Singh Brothers offer a distraction, allowing Mahal to pound him down and grab a chinlock.

Back up and Nakamura gets in a spinning kick to the jaw and a cross armbreaker but Jinder makes the ropes. Some hard kicks to the front and back of the head have Mahal reeling but here are the Singh Brothers for another distraction. This time it allows the Khallas to end Nakamura at 11:25.

Rating: D+. And Mahal retains to bore another day. I have no idea what’s supposed to interest me about Mahal but it’s really missing. Nakamura might not have been ready to win the title but the Singh Brothers distraction into a Khallas is about as lame of a finish as there is in WWE right now. If he had a great finisher or something it would make a big difference, but sweet goodness this let the air out of the place.

We recap the Universal Title match and simply put, this is going to be chaos. Brock Lesnar is defending against Braun Strowman, Samoa Joe and Roman Reigns with basically a guarantee of pure anarchy. I don’t think you need much more of an explanation.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Samoa Joe vs. Braun Strowman

Lesnar is defending, anything goes, and he leaves WWE if he loses. Naturally Paul Heyman handles Lesnar’s Big Match Intro and we’re ready to go. Joe goes after Lesnar while Strowman and Reigns head outside. The first suplex sends Joe outside but Reigns posts Strowman to set up the first showdown. The first German suplex drops Reigns and Joe comes in to take the second. NOW it’s the real showdown though with Strowman vs. Lesnar and the fans are way into this one.

Joe and Reigns cut it off though and we’re forced to wait a bit more. The wait is only a few seconds though as Reigns and Joe are knocked outside and it’s Strowman LAUNCHING Lesnar into the corner and clotheslining him hard to the floor. Reigns comes back in and clotheslines Strowman, who calmly shoves Reigns away. Joe grabs the Koquina Clutch on Lesnar but sidesteps a spear, sending Lesnar HARD through the barricade.

Joe Rock Bottoms Reigns onto the announcers’ table but Strowman runs Joe over, leaving him as the last man standing. Strowman goes to load up the table as Graves hopes he uses Saxton as a weapon. A running powerslam drives Brock through a table but Reigns dropkicks Strowman down. Joe’s suicide elbow drops Reigns so Strowman throws a commentator’s chair at both of them.

Lesnar is getting back up so Strowman powerslams him through the second announcers’ table. Fans: “ONE MORE TABLE!” Strowman obliges by turning the last table over on top of Lesnar, drawing a bunch of referees and agents to save the champ. Heyman: “NOOOOO!” We get a stretcher for Brock as Heyman is absolutely losing his mind. Lesnar is taken out and Strowman wants to know where the Beast is now.

Strowman picks up some steps and decks both guys but Reigns slows him down with a few shots. A shot with the steps has Strowman reeling and a third sends him outside, only to have Joe come in with a rollup for two on Reigns. Roman gets two off the Samoan drop but the Superman Punch is countered into the Koquina Clutch. Strowman is right back in though and a double chokeslam gets two.

The Undertaker chants start up and here’s Brock again. Strowman gets taken down and a running forearm knocks him to the floor. It’s Suplex City time with both Samoans being sent flying. Strowman, with a bloody ear, breaks out of a suplex attempt so Brock goes with the Kimura.

Reigns makes the save with a Superman Punch, followed by another one to both guys. A weird looking spear (Lesnar didn’t really go backwards) gets two on Brock but Reigns gets caught in the Koquina Clutch. That’s broken up by a Strowman dropkick (Cole: “Is there anything he can’t do?”) for two on Joe. The Pop Up Superman Punch gets two more on Strowman and Reigns is almost scared by the kickout.

Braun gets two more off the powerslam with Lesnar making a save. Lesnar can’t F5 Braun but Reigns spears Braun out to the floor, leaving him alone with Brock. Joe is back in with the Clutch on Lesnar but Brock reverses into the F5 for two with Reigns making the save for his only positive reaction of the night. Three straight Superman Punches drop Brock but the spear is countered into the F5 to retain the title at 21:01.

Rating: A. I need a breather. You can tell they’re setting up something special for Strowman here as he didn’t take the pin, nor did he have anyone really get the better of him all match. Lesnar vs. Strowman is REALLY tempting right now and I’d love to see it happen at some big match. Like at Survivor Series or so.

That being said, WOW what a fight. These guys beat the heck out of each other for a long time and Lesnar looked incredibly vulnerable at times. It’s amazing how much better these matches are when he’s not the unstoppable machine and it looks like WWE is starting to learn that. It was great stuff here and Strowman looked like a monster, which is all he needed to be here. The fallout from this is going to be interesting and Reigns taking the fall hopefully means a bit of a downgrade for him.

Lesnar looks like he just fell out of a building to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The first hour of this show was awful and came as close as you can get to sinking what was an otherwise very good show. For once it helps when you have that much more time after the first hour to save things, but hopefully this shows WWE (it won’t) that four hours is too long for a regular show. If you cut out some of the bad stuff, this is a classic. As it is, it’s just a very good show with a great main event. In other words, good, but WWE gets in its own way again.

That being said, I really liked parts of this with the main event obviously blowing away everything else on the show. They have some serious options going forward, assuming they can manage to get Lesnar to show up more than once every few months. Strowman looks like the star of stars at this point and if they don’t do him vs. Lesnar before the end of Wrestlemania XXXIV, they’ve lost their freaking minds. Good show, but it needs an hour or so shaved off to bring it to that next level.

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Main Event
Date: May 13, 2006
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Kevin Patrick

We’re coming up on Wrestlemania Backlash and that means it is probably going to be a show built around setting up the pay per view. In other words, a lot of Charlotte, Braun Strowman, Roman Reigns and the rest of the Raw and Smackdown players. That being said, Main Event has gotten a bit of an upgrade lately so maybe they can keep it going, at least a little bit. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

For the first time in far longer than I can remember, we actually open with something other than the standard opening sequence. Instead it’s a video on Ricochet vs. Mustafa Ali, as they have split matches on this show. Ali sends Ricochet a text saying “run it back”, meaning he wants a rematch. Ricochet, in a car, smiles and turns around. WHY COULDN’T WE HAVE SPENT YEARS DOING SOMETHING LIKE THIS????

Opening sequence.

Naomi vs. Nikki Cross

Lana is here with Naomi and it is nice to see Cross back. They shake hands to start and Naomi takes her into the corner for a clean break. A headlock takeover puts Cross down but she blocks a backslide attempt and grabs an armbar. Back up and Cross’ monkey flip is broken up so Naomi can enziguri her out to the floor. Naomi throws her back in for another headlock, followed by a bodyscissors to keep Cross in trouble. Cross slips out and hits a running seated senton for two but Naomi hits a springboard kick to the face. A bulldog is broken up and Cross hits the hanging swinging neckbreaker for the pin at 5:21.

Rating: C. The more I see of Cross the more I like her and it is great to see her getting to showcase herself here. Naomi has lost so many matches that another one isn’t going to mean a thing so having Cross get a win here could give her a nice boost. Above all else, maybe it means she is going somewhere. Then again not likely, but Main Event Cross is better than no Cross.

We look back at Roman Reigns retaining the Universal Title over Daniel Bryan and then Conchairtoing him as Cesaro was forced to watch.

From Smackdown, after Rollins jumped Cesaro in the aisle.

Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins

The Usos are at ringside. Cesaro, favoring his shoulder, pulls himself up and says ring the bell so Cesaro knocks him to the floor in a hurry. Back in and Cesaro hammers away but Rollins slips out of a gorilla press and kicks the knee out. Cesaro reverses a suplex into one of his own but the Swing is blocked. Instead Cesaro rolls him up for two but the Neutralizer is countered into a backdrop to the apron. Jey Uso offers a distraction so Rollins can hit the top rope superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two more.

Back with Rollins getting to the rope to avoid the Sharpshooter and Crossface but Cesaro puts him on top instead. Rollins comes right back with a buckle bomb but Cesaro comes out of the corner with a hard clothesline. Rollins gets sent outside where Jey checks on him, but Rollins doesn’t want the help and shoves him down. That earns Rollins a superkick so Cesaro dives onto Jimmy. Back in and the Neutralizer sends Cesaro to Backlash at 12:42.

Rating: C+. It wasn’t quite their Wrestlemania match but it wasn’t supposed to be. This was about getting Cesaro to the pay per view and they did that quite well, with the Uso screwup probably getting them in trouble with Reigns. Cesaro is on a roll and it makes a lot of sense to give him the title shot at the pay per view. Good stuff here, and Rollins teasing a bit of a different side could be very good for him.

From Smackdown.

Here are Roman Reigns, Paul Heyman and Jey Uso to wrap things up. Reigns starts recapping things but here’s Jimmy to interrupt. Jimmy recaps Jey vs. Roman Reigns in the I Quit match in the Cell, where Jimmy ran in for the save and got choked out, with Jey quitting to save his brother.

After that tape that they just happened to have laying around, Jimmy says he never would have quit. Reigns can’t believe that’s what this is about because he and Jey have moved forward. He isn’t going back and forth with Jimmy, who needs to fall in line and stand with them. Either that, or go home and watch Reigns and the Uso (singular) with his kids.

Jimmy goes to leave, gets conflicted, and then keeps walking. Jey goes to the floor to talk to him but here is Cesaro to jump Reigns. Despite Jimmy trying to hold him back, Jey runs in for the save but gets beaten down. Jimmy hesitates but comes in to go after Cesaro as well, earning himself the pop up European uppercut. A nearly botched Neutralizer plants Jey and there’s a better one to Reigns to end the show.

Eva Marie wants to be a role model.

From Raw.

Rhea Ripley vs. Asuka

Non-title. Ripley drives her up against the ropes to start but has to duck a shot to the face. A standoff lets Ripley stick out her jaw for a free shot, only to have Asuka sweep the leg. Ripley blocks a drop toehold into the corner and then has to go tot he ropes to block a cross armbreaker. They head outside with Ripley getting in a shot of her own….and here is Charlotte for a distraction so Asuka can hit a spinning backfist.

We take a break and come back with Charlotte on commentary as Ripley steps on Asuka’s back. Some clotheslines drops Asuka again but she sends Ripley outside. The knee off the apron has Ripley in trouble but she blocks the Asuka Lock back inside. Asuka is knocked outside where she glares at Charlotte, allowing Ripley to nail a headbutt.

Back in and Riptide is countered into a Codebreaker for two. Ripley heads outside to yell at Charlotte, allowing Asuka to hit a hip attack off the announcers’ table. Back in and a missile dropkick gives Asuka two but the hip attack in the corner is pulled out of the air. Ripley kicks Asuka in the head and hits Riptide for the pin at 12:15.

Rating: C. I’m really not sure what it means when I’m relieved that Ripley got a win. The title reign has been a near disaster for her, as Ripley has gone from being the brand new big deal to playing third fiddle to these two (and maybe even fifth fiddle to Nia Jax and Alexa Bliss). It will help a bit if she retains on Sunday, but it isn’t going to matter if we just get another Charlotte story out of the whole thing.

Mustafa Ali vs. Ricochet

Round three. They lock up to start with Ali shouldering him down in a hurry. With that going nowhere, Ricochet grabs a headlock to little avail as we’re right back to a standoff. Ricochet punches his way out of the corner and we’re already into a chinlock. That’s broken up in a hurry and Ali snaps off a belly to back suplex into a chinlock of his own. Back up and Ali sends him outside in a big heap as we take a break.

We come back with Ali shouting about being better than Ricochet, who scores with a running clothesline. A hiptoss puts Ali down so Ricochet rolls forward to pick him up into a suplex (cool) for two more. Ricochet’s bridging German suplex gets the same but Ali knocks him off the top.

A top rope sunset flip….keeps on going with Ali picking him up into a sitout powerbomb for two more. Ricochet manages to crotch him on top though and a super swinging neckbreaker (with Ricochet half dropping him on the way down) puts them both down. They head to the apron with Ricochet going up, only to have Ali grab him by the ears and suplex him to the floor. That’s enough of a crash for the double countout at 11:04. Or no contest, because modern wrestling likes to make things more complicated.

Rating: B. Ignoring the annoying official decision, this was a heck of a match that gives then a reason to have one more match, hopefully not on Main Event. That being said, I could go for it around here, just for the sake of having the match get a little more time. Good stuff here though, with both guys busting out some different and unique stuff and tearing the house down, even if there is a million to one shot of anyone caring.

Video on Bobby Lashley vs. Braun Strowman vs. Drew McIntyre.

From Raw.

Bobby Lashley vs. Drew McIntyre

Non-title and MVP is here with Lashley. It’s a brawl to start but Lashley can’t get an early Hurt Lock. Instead he snaps McIntyre’s throat across the top and grabs a neckbreaker for two. Some choking on the ropes keeps McIntyre in trouble until he gets in a shot to the face to take things outside. McIntyre snaps off an overhead belly to belly and we take a break.

Back with Lashley puling McIntyre off the middle rope for a crash, followed by the Downward Spiral for two. We hit the chinlock but Lashley’s suplex attempt is countered into one from McIntyre. Lashley runs him over again though and they head outside with McIntyre being posted this time. Back in and McIntyre sends him flying into the corner, followed by a pair of belly to belly suplexes.

There’s a jumping neckbreaker into the nipup and the Glasgow Kiss rocks Lashley again. MVP is panicking as McIntyre grabs a spinebuster for two. Lashley is back with a crossbody but the Hurt Lock is blocked. Instead Lashley suplexes him down, only to walk into the Claymore. Cue Braun Strowman to jump McIntyre from behind for the DQ at 13:27.

Rating: D+. They might as well have had a big clock over the ring here, counting down until Strowman ran in. There was little drama here and the WWE Title match at Wrestlemania should not feel like a tired match thirty days after the show. This feud has been a nightmare for everyone involved, including the people watching it, and this was the latest boring piece added onto the top.

Post match, Strowman gives McIntyre a running powerslam, followed by one to Lashley for daring to hug Strowman. Another powerslam plants McIntyre, and another sends Lashley through the part of the barricade designed for destruction. A third powerslam plants McIntyre to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I’m trying to get my mind around the idea of WWE actually caring about Main Event, even if it is just beefing up the use of some lower level people. Throw in Nikki Cross returning and it seemed like we had something that came close to mattering here. I could go for more of this, though I still have no reason to believe it is going to last. Years and years of the same thing can kind of break your will.

 

 

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Wrestlemania Backlash
Date: May 16, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Adnan Virk, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

It’s time for the Wrestlemania fallout pay per view and this time WWE isn’t exactly being subtle with the concept. The Raw side is mainly consisting of Wrestlemania rematches with another name added in, while the Smackdown side actually feels like some fresh matches. Hopefully that mixes together for a good show. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Sheamus to issue the open challenge, non-title of course.

Kickoff Show: Sheamus vs. Ricochet

Ricochet hammers away to start but gets taken down with a heck of a clothesline. Sheamus takes him into the corner and pounds him down, setting up the forearms to the chest. The fishhooking (dubbed the Dublin Smile) has Ricochet in even more trouble but Ricochet gets in some kicks to the chest.

The springboard clothesline into the standing shooting star into the Lionsault gives Ricochet two. Sheamus knees the heck out of him though but Ricochet hits a Backstabber into a springboard 450. The 630 misses though and Sheamus blasts him with another knee for the pin at 7:13.

Rating: C+. If nothing else, it was great to see Ricochet on a show outside of Main Event for a change as it makes me wonder if WWE is actually acknowledging the fact that he has been doing good stuff over there. That’s the kind of thing you can use these open challenges for, though the clean pin didn’t do him the most favors. It was better than nothing though, so maybe Ricochet’s fortunes are turning around a bit. I doubt it, but maybe.

Post match Sheamus puts on his hat and coat but Ricochet dropkicks him down and steals both of them.

The opening video, narrated by Batista, talks about how important Wrestlemania is while talking about where everything is going from here. The main matches get their focus as usual, while being interspersed with clips from Batista’s new Netflix film Army of the Dead.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match, with Rhea Ripley defending against Charlotte and Asuka. Ripley took the title from Asuka at Wrestlemania but then Charlotte returned and was put into the title match. Now it’s time for a triple threat for the title.

Raw Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte vs. Asuka

Ripley is defending and Charlotte’s gear is Cruella de Ville/101 Dalmatians inspired. Graves calls Ripley “arguably the one with the most to lose in this match.” Charlotte bails to the floor to start but gets surrounded and the beating begins, including a double superkick to put her on the floor. Asuka rolls Ripley up for two but Charlotte pulls Asuka outside and grabs a suplex. Charlotte and Ripley have the showdown, with Charlotte shouting about being a THIRTEEN TIME CHAMPION.

Asuka is back up but Ripley kicks her down, followed by a dropkick to do the same to Charlotte. Ripley heads to the apron but Charlotte trips her down to take over. Back in and Charlotte talks trash to Asuka, who strikes away in a hurry. Asuka snaps off the armbar but Charlotte gets her feet to the ropes….which don’t count in a triple threat match. Ripley makes the save but Charlotte sends her face first into the middle buckle. Charlotte has to chop Asuka though, allowing Ripley to come back with some clotheslines.

Asuka is back up with the rapid fire strikes and the rolling German suplexes to Charlotte. The missile dropkick hits Ripley and a sliding knee from the apron rocks her again. Charlotte kicks Asuka outside and there’s the moonsault to take both of them down. Back in and a double superplex drops Charlotte to put everyone down. They slug it out from their knees but Charlotte flips out of another double suplex and chop blocks them both.

A double Natural Selection gets a double near fall but Charlotte misses the moonsault. Asuka Codebreakers Charlotte and counters the Riptide, allowing Charlotte to boot Ripley in the face. Charlotte spins out of the Asuka Lock and boots down a charging Asuka. The boot causes Charlotte to fall to the floor though and Ripley Riptides Asuka to retain at 15:22.

Rating: C+. As expected, this was more about Charlotte than anything else, as it seems to be in her contract. Ripley escaped with the title (as commentary put it) and odds are we are going to be seeing the Ripley vs. Charlotte showdown in the near future. Ripley winning is good, but it would be nice to not have to be reminded that Charlotte is the greatest and most amazing thing ever every time she is in a big story (which is about all she does).

We look back at Braun Strowman, Drew McIntyre and Bobby Lashley brawling on Raw.

Miz isn’t scared of Damian Priest but doesn’t know why this is a lumberjack match. Not to worry though as John Morrison is ready to take care of the lumberjacks and make Priest fall into his thirst trap. Miz: “I don’t think you know what thirst trap means.”

We look at Robert Roode and Dolph Ziggler attacking Dominik Mysterio on the Kickoff Show.

Dominik can’t go so Rey Mysterio says he’ll do this himself.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio, in Adam West era Batman gear, is challenging on his own and hits them both in the face to start. Ziggler is knocked outside and a baseball slide sends him into the announcers’ table. Mysterio slides through Roode’s legs to splash Ziggler but Roode sends him head first into the apron. Back in and Rey drop toeholds Roode down setting up a victory roll for two.

Roode blasts Rey with a clothesline though and Ziggler comes in to rip at the face. It’s already back to Roode, who sends Rey into the corner to remind him there is no one to tag. Rey avoids a charge and dropkicks Ziggler off the apron but Roode knocks Mysterio into the Tree of Woe. Roode starts working on Rey’s knee and a wheelbarrow Fameasser combination gets two. Ziggler heads outside so Roode can throw Mysterio into a superkick (that was new/cool) for the nine as Ziggler can’t believe he beat the count.

Back in and Rey hits a double DDT, setting up a toss to send Ziggler into the post. Cue the banged up Dominik to get on the apron as Rey sends Roode outside, only to get Zig Zagged. Roode is back in for two off a gutbuster but he takes too long going up, allowing Rey to hit a super bulldog.

Rey gets over to the corner where Dominik tags himself in…and is spinebustered by Roode. Dominik is sent into the post but comes back with a superkick to Ziggler. The hot tag brings in Rey to clean house, including a 619 to Roode in the corner. Rey brings Dominik back in and sunset bombs Ziggler into the apron, setting up Dominik’s frog splash for the pin and the titles at 16:59.

Rating: B-. The action was good and the result is the right way to go, but I’m not sure why they couldn’t have just done the scheduled match without the Dominik injury angle. It was a dull start until Dominik got in and some things started happening though and that’s what mattered. What matters is getting the titles off of Roode and Ziggler though, as their reign was about as useless as you could get.

Post match, the Mysterios are rather pleased.

John Morrison goes to the lumberjacks’ conveniently labeled dressing room and finds….a bunch of zombies.

Jimmy Uso goes in to see Roman Reigns but finds Jey Uso. Jimmy thinks the door needs to say Roman Reigns and Jey Uso, or better yet, “Jimmy and Jey Uso, Tag Team Champions.” Does Jey even do Reigns’ laundry? Jey is ready to fight but here is Roman Reigns to stare Jimmy down. Jimmy wishes him good luck tonight and leaves.

John Morrison reports his zombie findings to Miz, who seems to think Morrison imagined it. The two leave and the zombies stagger after them.

Commentary (with a zombie on one of the screens behind them) explains that the zombies are from Batista’s Army of the Dead movie. Ah. Well that makes up for everything.

Damian Priest vs. Miz

John Morrison is here and there are indeed zombies, who have their own Titantron and theme music. They are everywhere, including underneath the announcers’ table, sending commentary running. Priest hammers away to start but gets knocked outside, where he beats up the zombies. Back inside and Miz gets in a big boot as Graves hits his tenth Walking Dead reference in about two minutes.

Priest sends him outside for a change and hits a clothesline on the way back in. The spinwheel kick sets up the top rope spinwheel kick for two more. Miz is back with the Figure Four until they get over to the ropes for the break. Both of them head outside to beat up the zombies together before diving back inside. Morrison gets on the apron for a distraction, allowing Miz to hit the running knee for two. The zombies pull Morrison behind the barricade and apparently eat him, leaving Priest to Hit The Lights on Miz for the pin at 6:54.

Rating: F. Yeah I’m thinking no on this one. A zombie horde just attacked Miz, Morrison and Priest on pay per view and outside of what is likely a comedy spot tomorrow night for Miz and Morrison, we’re just going to move on. It’s a paid sponsorship and all that jazz, but Priest could be something on Raw (which desperately needs it) and he gets this instead. This was really annoying and as little as I was looking forward to another Miz vs. Priest match, they managed to make it even worse. The wrestling itself was pretty dull, but egads man. Just let Priest be a star already.

Post match the zombies swarm Miz as Priest leaves.

Hell in a Cell is coming on June 20. Normally that’s an October show so that’s interesting.

Jey Uso catches up with Jimmy Uso, who thinks the sign on the door should say “Roman Reigns and his b****.”

We recap Bayley vs. Bianca Belair for the Smackdown Women’s Title. Belair won the title at Wrestlemania and Bayley is ready to prove that it was a fluke, because she is the best ever.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Bianca Belair

Belair is defending as Miz and Morrison being devoured by zombies about ten minutes ago is already just a memory. They go technical to start but Belair takes her down into a waistlock with ease, seemingly freaking Bayley out. Bayley teases going after the hair so Belair rolls her up for two, with the kickout sending Belair into the corner. A hiptoss brings Bayley back in from the apron and it’s already time for the breather.

Back in and Bayley knees her down, setting up a chinlock to draw Belair back to her feet. A belly to back suplex gets two on Belair but she catches Bayley on top and hits a delayed suplex. They head outside with Bayley dropping her ribs first onto the steps and adding a suplex onto the floor for two. A spinning side slam gives Bayley two more but Belair sends her outside for a change.

That gets on Bayley’s nerves and she comes back in to hammer away. Belair makes the comeback and hits a spinebuster for two. Bayley runs her over again with a clotheslines and drops the top rope elbow for two of her own. With Belair sent outside again, Bayley misses a charge, allowing McAfee to get in MJF’s “better than you and you know it” line.

Back in and a rollup with feet on the ropes gives Bayley two. Bayley even rakes the eyes to keep Belair in trouble, allowing her to use the hair for a ripcord Bayley to Belly and another near fall. With nothing else working, Bayley loads up the Rose Plant with the hair, but Belair rolls her up and uses the hair to hook the leg for the pin to retain at 16:02. The ending might have been a bit botched though as the hair dropped the leg halfway through, making it looked like Bayley kicked out.

Rating: B-. There were some somewhat sloppy moments here but they did a nice job of keeping me into the match. It might not have had a ton of drama, but what mattered here was getting a lot of time on the way to getting Belair her first major title defense out of the way. The ending could set up a rematch, which somehow may already be inside the Cell. That’s a bit of a jump, but I could go for a rematch.

MVP suggests that Braun Strowman isn’t smart enough to accept the business offer he was given and tonight, he is going to lose as a result.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Bobby Lashley won the title in March, beat Drew McIntyre to retain at Wrestlemania, and then both McIntyre and Braun Strowman became #1 contender.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Braun Strowman

Lashley, with MVP, is defending. It’s a brawl to start with Strowman getting double teamed as the other two head outside. McIntyre sends Lashley into the post until Strowman dives off the apron to drop both of them. Back in and McIntyre runs Lashley over before hitting a neckbreaker on Strowman. They head outside again with Strowman using the steps to take both of them down but the non-Strowmans double team him down too.

Lashley suplexes McIntyre onto the ramp but another suplex into the ramp is blocked. McIntyre rams Lashley head first into the set over and over before tossing him through it, meaning we get some sparks. That leaves McIntyre alone to scream and…..get taken down by Strowman. There’s the Strowman Express to put McIntyre down at ringside, setting up the backsplash for two back inside. A missed charge sends Strowman into the corner though and McIntyre hits a pretty impressive Michinoku Driver for two.

Strowman backdrops him to the floor and tries the Express again but McIntyre belly to belly suplexes him (with Strowman landing on his head). The Claymore is countered into a powerbomb through the announcers’ table as the canned chants declare this awesome. Commentary declares that Strowman is about to be the new champion because WWE commentary gets extra dumb in triple threat matches. Back in and the running powerslam is countered, with McIntyre hitting the Claymore. The spear to Strowman retains the title at 14:18.

Rating: C+. And then they go on to the Cell with Lashley vs. McIntyre because this feud needs to continue to suit the calendar so Raw doesn’t have to come up with a single new idea ever because that’s not what they do. I did not want to see this match coming in and I don’t want to see any form of a rematch, but that is what we are going to get because Raw doesn’t exist to be entertaining or creative any longer. This was a completely watchable triple threat power match with one of the most overdone endings you’ll get, which shouldn’t surprise you at all.

Hell in a Cell ad.

We recap Cesaro vs Roman Reigns. After dispatching Daniel Bryan, Reigns needed a new challenger so Cesaro stepped up and issued the challenge. Cesaro then beat Seth Rollins to earn the shot, his first ever one on one match at the World Title. Jimmy Uso returning and not being cool with Reigns treating his brother like a servant is being added in as a bonus factor.

Smackdown World Title: Cesaro vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is defending but before the match, he has Jey stay in the back because he is too worried about Jimmy. They start slowly with Cesaro powering him into the corner. A shoulder doesn’t get anyone anywhere as McAfee’s microphone is breaking up badly. Cesaro rolls him up for two and it’s time for a meeting with Paul Heyman at ringside. Back in and Reigns sends Cesaro face first into the buckle but Cesaro scores with the springboard spinning uppercut.

The Swing is blocked though and Cesaro tweaks his arm, which Reigns sends into the post. Reigns grabs a cravate and suplexes him down for daring to try a comeback. The cravate goes on again and the jumping clothesline gives Reigns two. Reigns loads up the Superman Punch but Cesaro counters it into the pop up uppercut. Some kicks and elbows to the leg set up the Sharpshooter on Reigns, who gets to the ropes in a hurry. Cesaro sends him outside for a corkscrew dive, followed by a high crossbody for two.

Reigns catches him on top though and grabs the arm again for a big boot, meaning the arm gets pulled again. The shotgun dropkick sends Cesaro’s shoulder into the post for two back inside and it’s time to crank on the arm even more. Reigns mocks Cesaro saying wrestling is fun and knees away in the corner, followed by a big boot to drop him again. Some uppercuts give Cesaro a breather and the discus lariat drops Reigns, only to bang up the bad arm even more.

They slug it out from their knees with Cesaro knocking him to the apron, setting up the apron superplex for two more. The arm gives out on the Neutralizer attempt though and Reigns pulls him down into the Fujiwara armbar. That’s reversed into a cradle for two but another springboard uppercut is Superman Punched out of the air for two.

The pop up uppercut doesn’t work again as the arm gives out, allowing Reigns to grab the guillotine. Cesaro powers out and gets the Sharpshooter (pulling back with the hands instead of wrapping the arm around) before switching into a Crossface in the middle of the ring. Reigns powers out of the grip and unloads with forearms to the face, followed by a Batista Bomb for two.

Cesaro flips him over but Reigns is right back with a front facelock into the guillotine. That’s reverses with something close to a powerbomb and Cesaro slips out, only to get pulled into it again. Cesaro tries to power out of the grip but the arm can’t do it and Cesaro is finally out at 27:24.

Rating: B+. Cesaro certainly brought it here and will likely get another title shot at some point. There is zero shame in losing to Reigns at the moment and Cesaro gave it quite the run here. This felt like a main event and Reigns broke a sweat, though I wasn’t quite believing that Cesaro was going to pull it off. Cesaro just getting here was the real accomplishment, making this more like the first Rocky vs. Apollo Creed fight. Very good match here, as Cesaro showed he can go at this level.

Post match here is Jey Uso to acknowledge Reigns with the lei, before jumping Cesaro. Cue Seth Rollins….to go after Cesaro as well. Rollins stomps him to the floor and hits him with a few chair shots. The chair is wrapped around the bad arm and sent into the post, followed by a Stomp on the floor to end the show. That’s probably your Smackdown Cell match.

Overall Rating: C+. This is one of the hardest ratings I’ve ever had to put together because the show is so torn down the middle. The Smackdown stuff was good to very good with matches that had been built up (some better than others) and then executed well enough. Their side did well and it felt like half of a pay per view.

Then there’s Raw and oh my goodness. I watch the show every week and somehow they have managed to get even worse time after time. Not only did the build feel lazy coming into the show (Hey, here are the Wrestlemania matches with one extra person added in as we keep talking about Wrestlemania!), but then you had another Charlotte showcase (#1928 I believe), a three way match where they hit each other over and over and then someone stole the pin and then……that other match.

First of all, I get why they did the zombie tie-in. It’s a check from Netflix and Batista is in the movie and all that good stuff. All fine and good, but there was NOWHERE else on the show to put that? Not as a segment, a backstage deal, or with R-Truth or something? No clearly the best solution was to put it in a match that didn’t need to happen in the first place and make the whole thing into a commercial instead of a way to make Priest look good. The match completely took me out of the rest of the show and I could not bring myself to be interested in anything else they did until the main event got rolling.

Tonight was a perfect summary of Raw in a few hours: the creative is repetitive and lazy and they do not care about building up anyone new because they know people are going to watch anyway. Smackdown is a perfectly fine if not good wrestling show and Raw is whatever garbage Vince and Bruce green light after turning down what are probably much better ideas. So enjoy your three hours of nonsense as the show continues to spin its wheels for years on end because WWE has gotten paid and it isn’t like they would get paid MORE with a bigger audience or anything.

Overall, this show was right down the middle, with the Smackdown stuff feeling good and the Raw stuff feeling like Raw stuff. Outside of the commercial called a match, the Raw matches were far from terrible, but they felt like something that had to be done instead of something with effort put into them. That has been the case from Raw for a long time now and there is nothing to suggest it is going to get any better.

Results

Rhea Ripley b. Asuka and Charlotte – Riptide to Asuka

Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode – Frog splash to Roode

Damian Priest b. Miz – Hit The Lights

Bianca Belair b. Bayley – Rollup

Bobby Lashley b. Braun Strowman and Drew McIntyre – Spear to Strowman

Roman Reigns b. Cesaro – Guillotine
 

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It’s time for the followup to Wrestlemania and this time they are making that as obvious as possible by calling the show Wrestlemania Backlash. WWE has run Backlash for years but this time around, WWE does not exactly seem to be putting much effort into the Raw side of things. Smackdown is a different story, but egads Raw is not exactly inspiring me here. Maybe the show can wind up going a bit better in action. Let’s get to it.

Raw Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley(c) vs. Asuka vs. Charlotte

There is no word on if WWE is going to do what they want to do and bill this as Charlotte vs. the world, as Asuka and Ripley, the champion, have felt like afterthoughts in the whole thing. That is not exactly a shock but unfortunately it is reality, as Ripley already beat Asuka at Wrestlemania so now it is time to bring Charlotte in. Why? Well because it’s always time to bring Charlotte in.

I’ll take Ripley to retain here though, as I think WWE knows they can’t just put the title right back on Charlotte as soon as possible. Ripley absolutely needs the win more, though it isn’t going to matter all that much if Charlotte continues to get all of the focus. Asuka is probably taking the fall here, setting up the rematch from Wrestlemania XXXVI so Charlotte and Ripley can have their showdown. I’m not sure where it goes from there, but Ripley holds onto the title here to keep things moving.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler(c) vs. Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio

The fact that I sighed as soon as I typed that out says a lot about the match. Ziggler and Rey had a match on Smackdown which had me wondering how much longer I could keep my eyes open. The tag format should be a little bit better and the idea of the father and son going after the titles works fine. The problem is Ziggler and Roode have defended the titles twice in four months, which isn’t the right way to make the fans care about them or the titles.

I think the Mysterios get the titles here, though it seems to be a matter of time before the reunited Usos get the belts back. There is zero point to keeping the titles on Ziggler and Roode at the moment, though they have been around for a long time now and them retaining would not stun me. I’ll go with the title change here though, if nothing else for a nice moment.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair(c) vs. Bayley

This is Belair’s first major defense after winning the title at Wrestlemania, which should tell you where this is going. I’m curious to see how Belair does in a slightly less high pressure situation which is still a pretty high level match. Bayley is a good person to put her out there with though, and hopefully everything winds up working well. Belair is the future though and I think you know what that means.

Belair retains here, as we get to find out where she can go as the long term champion. If nothing else, they aren’t taking the title off of her before they get to the big rematch with Sasha Banks. Bayley is the right kind of opponent to boost up Belair’s stock and we could be in for a pretty good match as well. There shouldn’t be much doubt here, so being able to create some is going to be a nice challenge.

Damian Priest vs. The Miz

Yeah this is still going and I’m not sure I get why either. It isn’t a fresh match and it isn’t an interesting one, but above all else it isn’t something that is going to help Priest in the long run. Priest is already in his late 30s and I’m really not sure why he is wasting even more time facing Miz, who he has beaten before. This really needs to be it, but that was the case with Wrestlemania too.

I’ll go with what makes sense here, as there is no reason for Priest to lose or come close to it. They seem to be teasing the idea of splitting up Miz and John Morrison in the near future, which wouldn’t be the greatest thing in the world but right now, Priest needs to win. He doesn’t have the big singles win on his own yet and while Miz isn’t that, a win could be a nice stepping stone to his future.

Raw World Title: Bobby Lashley(c) vs. Braun Strowman vs. Drew McIntyre

Egads I don’t care. I really just do not care. Strowman is being added to the whole thing to keep this from being a rematch from Wrestlemania/this week’s Raw and….my goodness I don’t know why that is supposed to be interesting. Strowman has not been interesting in a long time and adding him in isn’t going to make fans care about this match any more than they already do. That’s what we’re getting here though and hopefully we are done soon thereafter.

In theory, Lashley should retain here as there is almost no reason for anything else to happen. Strowman getting the title back is not going going to happen and McIntyre doesn’t need it again. The match is going to be the hoss fight and should be entertaining enough, but my goodness it has been a rough build, and that is not the kind of thing that makes me want to see the match.

Smackdown World Title: Roman Reigns(c) vs. Cesaro

We’ve finally gotten to Cesaro’s title shot, though honestly that might be what qualifies as making it for him. Reigns is on another planet at this point and no one should be taking the title from him for a LONG time, so Cesaro just getting to this spot after all these years is pretty impressive. It would be an amazing match to see with fans in person, especially if Cesaro gets to Swing him, but I think you know how this is ending.

Of course Reigns retains here, because there is no reason for anything else to happen. There might be a rematch set up and they might do it again at Money in the Bank, but Reigns could lose a pair of limbs and still wind up retaining the title here. Cesaro might win the title one day, but that day is not going to be Sunday, because Reigns is going to be champion for a long time to come.

Overall Thoughts

This feels more and more like the May pay per view that is taking place because we have to have a May pay per view, which isn’t exactly keeping my interest up. That being said, the six match card probably means they are likely to be out in less than three hours. That’s quite the relief, as this does not feel like anything resembling a major pay per view. If they can get in, get out and be done, this could be a lot worse. I’m not overly thrilled to see the show, but I’ve seen worse cards.

 

 

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Main Event
Date: May 6, 2021
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

Things are starting to pick up around here a little bit, as we have had an angle and a much higher profile match over the last few weeks. Last week saw Ricochet face Mustafa Ali, which is not the kind of match that you get to see around here very often. Now we get to see where things go from here, which will likely be right back to normal. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Ricochet vs. Mustafa Ali

Ok so it’s still going for another week. Ricochet dropkicks him down at the bell and hits a flying forearm, allowing him to hammer away. A kick to the face knocks Ali out of the corner and a springboard clothesline gives Ricochet two. Ali flapjacks him out of the corner for a breather though and the sneering is strong as he shouts that Ricochet can’t beat him.

Ricochet kicks away from a half crab attempt but gets caught in it a few seconds later. That’s broken up with a rope grab and Ricochet goes up top for a shooting star press crossbody, because of course he does. A kick to the chest and a clothesline drop Ali, followed by a dragon suplex for two. Ali hits the knee again and grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes (ala how he won last week) but Ricochet reverses into a rollup of his own for the pin at 5:45.

Rating: C+. It’s almost hard to imagine a story being told with Main Event matches yet here we are, mainly due to how good these people can be in the ring. For the life of me I don’t get how they aren’t more prominently featured on one of the major shows, or just as a tag team who can bring some energy to the shows. Either way, it’s a nice little boost for Main Event, even if I have no reason to believe it lasts.

We recap Daniel Bryan pushing for Cesaro to get a Universal Title shot but ultimately getting one himself.

From Smackdown.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan

Reigns, with Paul Heyman and some rather epic new music, is defending. Bryan dropkicks him into the corner to start and fires off the kicks but Reigns drops him with a single shot. A headlock is countered into a failed YES Lock attempt with Reigns bailing to the floor. That means a dropkick through the ropes into a running knee from the apron as we take a break. Back with Reigns turning him inside out off of a clothesline and grabbing a snap suplex.

The chinlock goes on to keep Bryan in trouble, followed by a right hand to the head to put Bryan down again. Bryan fights back with some kicks and puts Reigns on top, but the super hurricanrana is countered into a superbomb for two as we take a break. Back again with Reigns firing off some knees in the corner. Bryan gets in a shot of his own and puts Reigns on top for a belly to back superplex.

The cover is delayed so Reigns gets out, meaning they’re both down again for a bit. Bryan is up first and gets smart by kicking at the arm a bit more, followed by some snaps over his shoulder. Reigns misses a charge and falls to the floor, setting up the suicide dive. That’s pulled out of the air and Reigns snaps off a belly to belly. The spear only hits barricade though and we take another break.

Back again with Bryan hitting the Swan Dive for two but Reigns hits the Superman Punch for the same. The running knee connects but Reigns gets a foot on the rope. Bryan slaps on the YES Lock, which is quickly reversed into a cradle for the break. Reigns hits the spear for a near fall and Reigns is stunned. The guillotine can’t go on in full as Bryan reverses into the YES Lock again but Reigns powers out. The heavy forearms knock Bryan silly and a heck of a powerbomb plants him again. Reigns goes to pick him up and puts on the guillotine, this time with the healthy arm and Bryan is out at 27:18.

Rating: A-. This was just a step behind their Fastlane classic and that’s more than great on a free TV match. There is something great about Bryan using the technical abilities to cut Reigns down but Reigns kept coming back with straight power. Then Reigns switched to the intelligence by switching to the good arm for the win and that was just too much. Awesome match here, and one of the better TV matches in recent memory. Also: McAfee was outstanding here and sounded like the best and most polished WWE broadcaster in a very long time. He really is awesome at this and I’m impressed.

Post match Reigns grabs some chairs but here is Cesaro for the save. Cesaro knocks Reigns to the floor but Jey Uso jumps him from behind. Uso ties Cesaro in the ropes and Reigns gives Bryan the Conchairto to end the show.

From Raw.

Eva Marie, now with slightly pink hair, is back. She is laying on a car and asking if she has out attention now. Eva says she wants to make things better and be in a place that challenges her, so the Eva-Lution has begun.

From Raw.

Cue Sonya Deville, who, after a break, is in the ring as Charlotte talks about how glad she is to be back. However, she needs to be added to the Wrestlemania Backlash title match because she is a big star. Putting her in the title match is going to make it a bigger deal because she is a big deal. She is an influencer and whether you love her or hate her, the division needs her. Charlotte tells Sonya to be fair to Flair, which is enough to get Sonya to add her to the title match.

Cue Rhea Ripley to say this is nonsense and Charlotte shouldn’t be in the title match again for the obvious reason: nobody likes her. Ripley and Asuka have a purpose in the match, but adding Charlotte is unfair. Cue Asuka to say she’s ready for both of the. Charlotte promises to win the title but Ripley gets in Sonya’s face. Charlotte jumps Ripley from behind and the fight is on with Asuka clearing the ring. I don’t think there was any doubt that Charlotte was going to be added, though it almost feels like trolling the fans.

Backlash rundown.

From Smackdown.

Aleister Black talks about people looking at him and judging him because this is the nature of man. We go to the animation again, with Black talking about walking the halls in high school and having everyone think something about him. People cared about building their own lives on a foundation of lies. Imagine thinking that is real or falling for that. His father never fed him those dreams, because the truth is that there is something horribly wrong with all of that and all of you. He could give us the keys, but he won’t. The animation is a different way to go and these are intriguing so far.

Jeff Hardy vs. Jinder Mahal

This is Mahal’s return for the first time in nearly a year and has Veer and Shanky, formerly known as Indus Sher, with him. Hardy charges at him in the corner and hammers away before firing off shoulders in the corner. Mahal gets in a shot to the back and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Mahal dumps him over the top for the big crash and we take a break before Veer and Shanky can maul him.

We come back with Mahal stomping away even more, followed by some shoulders to the ribs. A suplex gives Mahal two and we hit the abdominal stretch. Jeff jawbreaks his way to freedom and forearms him down, setting up the basement dropkick for two. Mahal avoids a charge in the corner though and hits a jumping knee to the face. The Khallas finishes Hardy at 9:18.

Rating: C-. Yep, this was a Jinder Mahal match and it’s the same thing it always was: the same boring, basic match, with Mahal being in great shape and not being able to do anything memorable whatsoever. I’m sure he’ll get some big push and will likely have a feud with Drew McIntyre, as fans continue to not be overly interested in the most generic heel wrestling imaginable.

Video on the Backlash triple threat match for the Raw World Title.

From Raw.

Bobby Lashley vs. Braun Strowman

Non-title and MVP is here too. Lashley’s running shoulder to start just annoys Strowman so he clotheslines Lashley outside instead. Back in and Lashley runs Strowman over with his own clothesline but Strowman is right back up….as Drew McIntyre comes out. The distraction lets Lashley take Strowman down again, allowing him to tease an alliance with McIntyre as we take a break. Back with McIntyre on commentary and Lashley choking on the rope.

Lashley keeps hammering away and hitting a running right hand in the corner as commentary brings up Drew McIntyre taking promo classes back in the day. Strowman is back with an electric chair to Lashley (whose eyes bug out when he goes up) but he slips out of the running powerslam. The Hurt Lock is blocked and Strowman hits a sidewalk slam. They head outside with the Strowman Express hitting McIntyre by mistake. McIntyre gets up on the apron and the distraction lets Lashley hit the spear for the pin at 13:12.

Rating: D+. Good night I’m bored with this feud. It’s just three people attacking each other over and over again on Raw, leading up to them all hitting each other at once (and I bet it doesn’t even turn into a paining as Eye of the Tiger starts playing). This three way feud has been so dull and lifeless and it needs to wrap up already. Next week is likely going to be McIntyre vs. Lashley because that’s the most obvious and easy thing that WWE could do, which is why I fully expect it.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure how to handle the idea of Main Event being treated like a (very minor) place where things happen. It was the kind of show that doesn’t mean very much but if we get to use it as a tryout for new things, I’ll accept it as the televised, one off version of a house show. The show still isn’t good, but at least it is moderately more interesting and that’s an upgrade.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: May 10, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Adnan Virk, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania Backlash and that means it is time to push the rest of the card forward in a big way. There are currently two Raw matches set for the pay per view so in theory we are going to need some more stuff announced tonight. You can probably guess those matches from here and now we get to see how dull they can make the show that announces them. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Bobby Lashley beating Braun Strowman and then getting Claymored by Drew McIntyre. As a result: Lashley vs. McIntyre this week.

Opening sequence.

Charlotte/Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler vs. Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke/Asuka

Jax powers Mandy into the corner to start so Baszler can choke with the boot. Baszler grabs a standing armbar and takes Rose down without much effort. Asuka comes in and dropkicks Baszler down, with Mandy and Dana dropkicking Shayna and Nia to the floor. After Reginald backflips off the apron…..here is Alexa Bliss on her swing with Lily next to her.

Bliss is here to watch someone and we take a break. Back with Charlotte holding Rose in the Figure Four necklock and then Jax coming in to power her around even more. Rose slips over and makes the hot tag off to Brooke, who gets to clean a bit of the house. Baszler backbreakers her down….and then her knee gives out. It starts shaking and Baszler kind of collapses, allowing the legal Asuka to come in with the Shining Wizard for the pin at 8:40.

Rating: D. Oh boy we could be in for a long night. So the evil doll is now using magical powers to go after Baszler’s leg? Does this count as another story for Nia Jax? Anyway, this is not exactly looking like a great night and the fact that Rhea Ripley was barely mentioned here does not exactly give me hope. It was a bad match and the ending was even worse, which isn’t even that much of a surprise.

Post match Charlotte drops Asuka as Alexa laughs a lot.

Riddle scooters up to New Day in the back and talks about how RKBro is in the process of registering to be an official team. That’s better than AJ Styles and Omos, who aren’t even a real team. Randy Orton comes up and the three of them talk about how great it was when Orton got hit with tomatoes. Orton doesn’t seem to agree but finds the idea of ending careers and kicking people in the head funny. Violence is promised for later.

MVP comes in to see Braun Strowman, who tells him to get out. Strowman isn’t interested in talking business but MVP says that Bobby Lashley would rather lose the WWE Title to Strowman instead of Drew McIntyre (not that he’s losing of course). Tonight, if McIntyre would happen to get hurt, that would leave us with Lashley vs. Strowman on Sunday, with no McIntyre to interfere. Strowman doesn’t like MVP, but seems interested.

We recap Damian Priest beating John Morrison last week thanks to some botched Miz interference. Priest vs. Miz is set for Wrestlemania Backlash.

Priest is in Adam Pearce’s office when Miz and Morrison come in. Morrison seems to blame Miz for the loss last week so a deal is offered: the winner of Priest vs. Morrison tonight gets to pick the stipulation for Miz vs. Priest. Miz doesn’t seem happy, but Morrison knows tonight calls for a light shower of Johnny Drip Drip.

Jinder Mahal is back with Veer and Shanky (formerly Indus Sher in NXT) and is ready to get back on the throne.

Jinder Mahal vs. Jeff Hardy

Rematch from last week’s Main Event of all things and Veer and Shanky are with Mahal. Hardy gets taken down and stomped a lot to start before a suplex puts him down again. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Hardy fights up and hits his spinning mule kick to escape. A middle rope ax handle connects and Jeff gets to take his shirt off but the Twist of Fate is countered into a jumping knee to the face. The Khallas finishes Hardy at 3:25.

Rating: D+. Yeah it’s still Mahal. He has a good look and the eyes look crazy intense but it’s the same boring person who is still one of the all time worst WWE champions. I understand why WWE insists on pushing him but throwing him out there with a pair of lackeys isn’t going to be the big saving grace for his career. Mahal is technically fine, but he’s so uninteresting.

Charlotte, who changed clothes in a hurry, comes in to see Sonya Deville.

Elias and Jaxson Ryker have tomatoes (yes, really) but AJ Styles and Omos come up to ask why they’re doing this. Elias loads up a song but AJ says we’re just going to be more serious. Omos crushes a tomato to prove his point.

RKBro/New Day vs. AJ Styles/Omos/Elias/Jaxson Ryker

Riddle tries an armbar on Elias to start but the rope break is good for an early save. Ryker comes in and gets kicked down by Riddle, which just seems to fire Ryker up even more. Omos tags himself in so Riddle goes after him, only to be shoved down in a hurry. A kick to the ribs is flipped away so Kofi comes in, only to get headbutted down. Orton comes in to try his luck and then rolls outside in a smart move as we take a break.

Back with Riddle getting knocked into the wrong corner for a stomping. Elias elbows him down and Ryker drops an elbow for two. Riddle fights up and gets over to Kofi to pick up the pace, with Woods coming in a few seconds later. Kofi tags himself back in for a high crossbody for two on AJ and it’s already back to Woods. AJ takes him down and hands it back to Ryker to hammer away in the corner. The chinlock doesn’t last long but Ryker plants him with a spinebuster for two.

Elias’ swinging suplex gets two and we hit the chinlock with a knee in Woods’ back. Woods fights out of that just like it’s a chinlock and the hot tag brings in Riddle to clean house. Omos makes a fast save and knocks Riddle out of the air with most of a right hand. Woods dropkicks AJ through the rope and New Day grabs an AJ leg each to run in a circle. Back in and Orton hits the RKO to finish Elias at 14:08.

Rating: C-. That is pretty easily the best thing on the show and it wasn’t really that good in the first place. Too much Ryker and Elias here, though Omos continues to look like a monster. Having Orton be scared of him meant more to him than anything he has done to New Day so they are doing things right with him. Not a good match, but it was an upgrade after the horrible first forty minutes or so.

Post match Orton hits the RKO on Kofi and Woods as Riddle isn’t pleased.

Rhea Ripley (hey she’s on the show) comes in to Sonya Deville’s office and gets in a showdown with Asuka. Tonight, they are going to have a match, which Ripley doesn’t seem to like. She saw Charlotte come in here earlier and she knows what that means. Asuka says she has already had a match but she is ready for Ripley anyway. Ripley says game on.

MVP doesn’t like the idea of Bobby Lashley having to beat Drew McIntyre again because it is like a sequel with a foregone conclusion. Lashley promises to win tonight and MVP won’t have any discussion over ongoing negotiations with Braun Strowman.

Sheamus vs. Humberto Carrillo

Non-title. Before the match, Sheamus talks about needing to prove his greatness with the Open Challenge, even if it means someone like Adnan Virk, who is way over his head on commentary, gets a shot. Tonight, Carrillo isn’t getting a title shot but he is getting a Brogue Kick to the face. Sheamus forearms him in the back to start but Humberto gets in a kick to the face. A dropkick puts Sheamus on the floor, where he catches a baseball slide and sends Carrillo into the barricade.

We take a break and come back with Sheamus hitting the forearms to the chest and grabbing a reverse chinlock. An Alabama Slam gets two on Carrillo so Sheamus takes him up top, only to get pulled down with a super hurricanrana. A sunset bomb to the floor connects, even though Sheamus lands on Carrillo’s knee. It’s actually too much and the referee calls it off at 9:10….with Sheamus winning, despite being down too.

Rating: C-. The ending really took away from this one but all that matters is if Carrillo is ok. That was a nasty landing and you could tell that something was wrong in a hurry. Hopefully everything is ok, as I’m not sure where things are going to go otherwise. Assuming Carrillo can do it, I could see this one getting a rematch on Sunday, though I’m curious to see where Mansoor fits into this, assuming he does.

Video on Lucha House Party. They’re Lucha Lit.

Eva Marie wants to prove herself so she is back where it all began. Coming soon.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Cedric Alexander

Cedric flips around to start but the threat of Paydirt sends him outside. Shelton takes him back inside where he gets caught with a dragon screw legwhip, meaning Cedric can start in on the knee. Benjamin manages to reverse into a modified Sharpshooter so Cedric goes straight to the rope. With Shelton being knocked to the floor, Cedric loads up a dive but runs into a jumping knee to the face. Back in and Paydirt is countered into a rollup, followed by the Neuralizer to drop Benjamin. Cedric takes WAY too long trash talking though and walks into the exploder suplex for the pin at 4:22.

Rating: C. The ending was a bit of a surprise, but then again I’ve long since given up on believing the idea that Alexander is ever going to get a push on his own. I’m not sure what WWE doesn’t see in him, if nothing else as a good hand in the ring. Shelton isn’t likely to get a push either, but at least the match told a story. A short story, but a story nonetheless.

We recap Angel Garza kicking a rose, uh, up Drew Gulak.

Gulak interrupts Garza’s photo shoot and asks if he is going to be serious. Garza doesn’t seem to mind and threatens to do it again, if they have a next time.

Rhea Ripley vs. Asuka

Non-title. Ripley drives her up against the ropes to start but has to duck a shot to the face. A standoff lets Ripley stick out her jaw for a free shot, only to have Asuka sweep the leg. Ripley blocks a drop toehold into the corner and then has to go to the ropes to block a cross armbreaker. They head outside with Ripley getting in a shot of her own….and here is Charlotte for a distraction so Asuka can hit a spinning backfist.

We take a break and come back with Charlotte on commentary as Ripley steps on Asuka’s back. Some clotheslines drops Asuka again but she sends Ripley outside. The knee off the apron has Ripley in trouble but she blocks the Asuka Lock back inside. Asuka is knocked outside where she glares at Charlotte, allowing Ripley to nail a headbutt.

Back in and Riptide is countered into a Codebreaker for two. Ripley heads outside to yell at Charlotte, allowing Asuka to hit a hip attack off the announcers’ table. Back in and a missile dropkick gives Asuka two but the hip attack in the corner is pulled out of the air. Ripley kicks Asuka in the head and hits Riptide for the pin at 12:15.

Rating: C. I’m really not sure what it means when I’m relieved that Ripley got a win. The title reign has been a near disaster for her, as Ripley has gone from being the brand new big deal to playing third fiddle to these two (and maybe even fifth fiddle to Nia Jax and Alexa Bliss). It will help a bit if she retains on Sunday, but it isn’t going to matter if we just get another Charlotte story out of the whole thing.

Here’s the same video on Lashley vs. Strowman which opened the show.

Drew McIntyre isn’t worried about Braun Strowman tonight because he’s moving on to Wrestlemania Backlash to get the title back.

John Morrison vs. Damian Priest

Miz is here with Morrison and the winner picks the stipulation between Miz and Priest on Sunday. Priest starts fast with a side slam but Morrison kicks him in the ribs. Morrison can’t pull him quite into a rollup so he hammers away instead. A spinning knee to the face gives Morrison two and we hit the chinlock. Miz turns into a cheerleader, making it clear that in fact, drippin ain’t easy.

Back up and Morrison misses a charge to wind up on the apron, where Priest misses some kicks to the head. Morrison hits his own kicks, but Priest is right back with a pop up forearm to the face. The rope is grabbed for the break and Miz pulls Morrison to the floor for a chat. Miz and Priest tease a brawl and we take a break. Back with Priest being knocked outside again, where Miz gets in a big boot.

Morrison adds in a few kicks to the ribs for two, followed by a Russian legsweep for the same. We hit a neck crank (like Morrison is loading up a neckbreaker but just pulls instead of dropping down) but Priest escapes and hits his own kicks to the head. The Broken Arrow gives Priest two, followed by the top rope spinwheel kick for the same. Miz offers a distraction so there is no count when Morrison grabs a crucifix. Instead Priest hits a clothesline and Hits The Lights for the pin at 12:57.

Post match Miz runs in to go after Priest but he breaks away, sending Miz running. Another Hit The Lights plants Morrison and Miz is terrified. No stipulation is announced yet.

Bobby Lashley and Braun Strowman bump into each other in the back.

Eva Marie talks about looking like a supermodel but wanting to be a role model.

Priest picks a lumberjack match.

Backlash rundown.

Bobby Lashley vs. Drew McIntyre

Non-title and MVP is here with Lashley. It’s a brawl to start but Lashley can’t get an early Hurt Lock. Instead he snaps McIntyre’s throat across the top and grabs a neckbreaker for two. Some choking on the ropes keeps McIntyre in trouble until he gets in a shot to the face to take things outside. McIntyre snaps off an overhead belly to belly and we take a break.

Back with Lashley puling McIntyre off the middle rope for a crash, followed by the Downward Spiral for two. We hit the chinlock but Lashley’s suplex attempt is countered into one from McIntyre. Lashley runs him over again though and they head outside with McIntyre being posted this time. Back in and McIntyre sends him flying into the corner, followed by a pair of belly to belly suplexes.

There’s a jumping neckbreaker into the nipup and the Glasgow Kiss rocks Lashley again. MVP is panicking as McIntyre grabs a spinebuster for two. Lashley is back with a crossbody but the Hurt Lock is blocked. Instead Lashley suplexes him down, only to walk into the Claymore. Cue Braun Strowman to jump McIntyre from behind for the DQ at 13:27.

Rating: D+. They might as well have had a big clock over the ring here, counting down until Strowman ran in. There was little drama here and the WWE Title match at Wrestlemania should not feel like a tired match thirty days after the show. This feud has been a nightmare for everyone involved, including the people watching it, and this was the latest boring piece added onto the top.

Post match, Strowman gives McIntyre a running powerslam, followed by one to Lashley for daring to hug Strowman. Another powerslam plants McIntyre, and another sends Lashley through the part of the barricade designed for destruction. A third powerslam plants McIntyre to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. This show felt so lazy. You had two Wrestlemania rematches tonight, and both matches were designed to make me see two triple threat matches on Sunday, albeit with Charlotte and Braun Strowman added. Throw in that the other Raw match is a stripped down version of the big tag match from Wrestlemania and this doesn’t feel so much like Wrestlemania Backlash, but rather Wrestlemania’s direct to video sequel with the same plot slightly dressed up. In no way does this make me want to see Sunday’s show, but rather it just makes me think there is nothing to the Raw half of the pay per view.

You know what else makes this show look bad? Smackdown, which also has three matches set, but all of them are fresh matches. It makes me think that they are trying over there, which is a heck of a lot more than I get watching Raw. There is nothing here to make me think that Raw is going to be a good show week to week, and that is leaving out the magic and tomatoes. Raw is just horrible at the moment and the mixture of lazy and bad is striking. There were a few minor pieces in here that worked, but the repetitive storytelling and uninspired build have made me want to watch a test pattern instead of Backlash. Do better.

Results

Asuka/Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke b. Charlotte/Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler – Shining Wizard to Baszler

Jinder Mahal b. Jeff Hardy – Khallas

RKBro/New Day b. AJ Styles/Omos/Jaxson Ryker/Elias – RKO to Elias

Sheamus b. Humberto Carrillo via referee stoppage

Shelton Benjamin b. Cedric Alexander – Exploder suplex

Rhea Ripley b. Asuka – Riptide

Damian Priest b. John Morrison – Hit The Lights

Drew McIntyre b. Bobby Lashley via DQ when Braun Strowman interfered

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