Wrestlemania XXXVI Night 1
Date: April 4, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
Host: Rob Gronkowski

A year has passed since this show and it still does not seem real. Aside from the main event, this show has almost been erased from history as it is barely ever discussed whatsoever. The Coronavirus wiped everything out and the show was moved to the Performance Center, making it feel like a show that they had just to say they had it. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cesaro vs. Drew Gulak

Their respective friends (Shinsuke Nakamura/Sami Zayn and Daniel Bryan) are feuding so these two are having a match as well. Yeah it’s weak but what else are they supposed to do? Cole is calling this one on his own and it sounds so strange. Gulak goes for the arm to start but a short armscissors is countered into a powerbomb. They head outside with Cesaro getting in another shot but the arm is banged up.

An armdrag on the bad arm sets up a whip into the steps but Cesaro uppercuts him out of the air for two. A Fujiwara armbar is broken up so Gulak settles for two off a sunset flip. Cesaro boots him in the face and loads up a torture rack airplane spin (with no hands at one point for a crazy visual) before just dropping Gulak for the pin at 4:27.

Rating: C. The match was fine but EGADS this is bizarre. It’s like we’re watching a training session that was recorded and they slapped a Wrestlemania logo on the thing. It was watchable enough and would have been acceptable as a warmup but I can’t believe that this is Wrestlemania. Of course it isn’t on WWE given the circumstances but my goodness this is weird and that isn’t likely to change over the course of the show.

Stephanie McMahon welcomes us to the show and says that while this is going to be the most different Wrestlemania ever (due to the current circumstances, with no mention of the virus, which was a weird WWE thing for a LONG time).

Rather than someone singing America the Beautiful live, we get a montage of previous performances. Fair enough and actually a pretty cool idea.

The opening video continues the pirate theme but someone doing a pretty bad Jack Sparrow impression cuts it off, saying it sounds like they are starting at the end. He says the video isn’t trying and calls for the “classic movie trailer voice”. The trailer voice is cut off by the Sparrow impression (which is how he refers to it) but the video still doesn’t work, so he says go to the shots of our heroes looking all serious. These people are larger than life and are marred by the work of hundreds of days and nights.

This is their quest for gold, glory and immortality. Tonight, forget EVERYTHING you know because fate leads the way, and fate can surprise us. History waits for no one and tonight, their chance to shape history begins right now. The traditional montage takes over from here. I love pirate movies and while this was pretty much a parody of the idea, it makes me wonder how good the real thing would have been with the WWE budget behind a pirate themed show.

Host Rob Gronkowski (erg) welcomes us to the show and does some fine script reading as he talks about how this is a two night event. He talks about being able to start a party on a Saturday night, even if that might be a little difficult in a mostly empty building. Mojo Rawley joins him because you need the hype here. Gronk gives him some pretty lame chops and we’re off to the first match.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross vs. Kabuki Warriors

The Warriors (Asuka/Kairi Sane) are defending and commentary points out that they took the titles from Bliss/Cross back in October. This is their first title defense since DECEMBER, because the titles really don’t mean much in WWE. Asuka and Bliss get things going with a lot of laughing but it’s off to Sane without any contact. Sane shoves Bliss around a bit, drawing Bliss back up to knock Sane down. That sets up the double knees to the ribs and a tag off to Cross, who is taken into the champs’ corner.

Some forearms stagger Asuka though and Bliss tags herself in. That means a baseball slide can knock Sane outside, followed by a flip dive from the apron. Back in and Asuka punches Cross in the face, allowing the tag back to Sane. Everything breaks down again with the Warriors taking over on the floor. Back in again and a bulldog into a basement dropkick rocks Cross but Sane gets a bit cocky.

That means Cross can kick her away, allowing the tag back to Bliss. House doesn’t have time to be cleaned though as Asuka offers a distraction, allowing Sane to catch Bliss in the ropes. The Alberto double stomp gets two and Bliss is in trouble, despite Cross trying to get….well no one here to clap. The referee yells at Asuka, allowing Sane to snap Bliss’ neck across the ropes.

Bliss forearms Asuka in the face so Asuka kicks her head off. Another shot from Bliss allows the hot tag to Cross, meaning it’s a lot of screaming as she forearms and bulldogs Sane. A high crossbody gives Cross two but Sane gets in a cheap shot from the apron. The Reckoning gets two on Asuka with Sane breaking it up off a top rope elbow (and possibly with a camera edit because that count looked ready to go down before Sane appeared).

Asuka tries the Asuka Lock on Cross but Bliss breaks it up with Twisted Bliss. Back up and Asuka hits a Codebreaker on Cross but the Insane Elbow is broken up. Instead it’s a powerbomb/top rope forearm to knock Cross silly….for two. Nikki avoids a charge to send Asuka into the post. The Reckoning sets up another Twisted Bliss for the pin and the titles at 15:11.

Rating: C. That was a lot longer than I would have bet on but the title change was the right way to start. If nothing else, just so Bliss can do her pose with a title again. You can only have the Warriors hold the title so long before it stops meaning anything due to a lack of defenses. I can’t imagine this makes a huge difference, but it was the right move here.

Sami Zayn brags about taking the Intercontinental Title from Braun Strowman, even though people thought it was inevitable that Strowman would destroy him. Tonight, people think it is inevitable that Daniel Bryan will take the title from him, but we’ll see about that.

King Corbin vs. Elias

This is fallout from Corbin knocking Elias off a platform here in the arena. That should have, you know, broken most of his bones, but instead it put him out for eight days. Corbin insists that Elias isn’t here but the comeback is here before the referee can even start to count. Corbin goes outside to start the fight in the aisle so Elias blasts him in the back with the guitar.

Elias sends him into various things and they head inside for the opening bell. An elbow to the face gives Elias two and it’s time to choke near the ropes. Corbin tosses him over the top and wants the countout but settles for right hands to the ribs back inside. The slide underneath the rope in the corner clothesline gets two on Elias and it’s time to hammer on Elias’ bad shoulder (because he has a bad shoulder after crashing off the balcony last week).

Said bad shoulder goes into the post for two and Corbin yells at the referee, which you can hear a lot more of in the empty arena. Back up and Elias sends him shoulder first into the post to even things up a bit. A kick out of the corner sends Corbin into another corner and Elias hammers away. Elias has to roll through the top rope elbow and charges into Deep Six for two. Back up and Elias nails a jumping knee to the face but gets sent throat first into the ropes. A rollup with feet on the ropes gives Corbin two but the referee catches the cheating and yells a lot. Instead Elias grabs a rollup and tights for the pin at 8:52.

Rating: C-. That’s one of the least interesting matches I can remember in a long time, but what were you expecting given who was in there? It’s bad enough that Elias’ big revenge was a rollup pin after getting beaten down for a few minutes, but the fact that it came over Corbin made things even worse. Just not an interesting match and it would have felt a lot better as the nothing Kickoff Show match instead.

We recap Shayna Baszler vs. Becky Lynch for the Raw Women’s Title. Becky Lynch has been champion for about a year and is out of people to face. Baszler showed up from NXT and….bit Becky’s neck for some reason, drawing a bunch of blood. Then Baszler demolished the Elimination Chamber match to become #1 contender (in other words she beat up a bunch of losers and Asuka), setting up Lynch’s biggest challenge in a long time. Lynch reminding Baszler that she beat Ronda Rousey to get the title was a great response and this was a heck of a build.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Shayna Baszler

Lynch is defending and drives to the arena in a semi truck because…something about the Man I guess? They go straight to the slugout to start and the threat of the Kirifuda Clutch sends Becky bailing out to the floor. Baszler is sent into the steps to put her in trouble, followed by a missile dropkick back inside. Lynch comes up favoring her back but hammers away in the corner anyway.

A hard knee rocks Lynch but she slips out of the Kirifuda Clutch to grab a rollup instead. Baszler grabs a cutter for two but can’t hit a running knee. They fight to the apron with Lynch talking trash as they forearm it out. Lynch Rock Bottoms her onto the apron for two and the champ looks a bit surprised.

Baszler slams her off the top and grabs a quickly broken cross armbreaker. Instead Baszler puts on her own Disarm Her but Lynch is out in a hurry. This time Lynch grabs the Disarm Her on the ropes, only to have Baszler knock her off the rope for a big crash. Baszler picks her up for a hard swing into the announcers’ table (geez that always looks rough) before throwing it back inside. The Kirifuda Clutch goes on but Lynch backflips over for the pin to retain at 8:32.

Rating: C. Yeah I’m not sure I get this one, as Lynch was ready to lose the title and Baszler seemed primed to take the thing from her. Throw in the Lynch was about to go on maternity leave (fair enough that she didn’t know it at this point) and there was no reason to not switch the title here. It seemed that they were setting up a submission rematch, but at some point you need to just change the title and be done with it, which should have been the case here.

Intercontinental Title: Sami Zayn vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan, with Drew Gulak, is challenging and Cesaro and Shinsuke Nakamura are here with Zayn. Rob Gronkowski and Mojo Rawley do the YES chant from the balcony, which just looks sad with two people in there. Sami bails straight to the floor and then does it again to get in Bryan’s head. Back in and the third exit ensues, which finally causes Bryan to go after him, only to have Cesaro and Nakamura get in the way.

Gulak dives onto the two of them and hammers away, meaning Gulak and Zayn get to have their own staredown. Bryan finally gets his hands on Zayn thanks to a suicide dive and it’s time to crank on the leg. Zayn is sent outside again for another suicide dive, followed by a missile dropkick back inside. Bryan slaps him in the face and shouts that Zayn is the loser because he hasn’t beaten anyone.

The running dropkick in the corner might have Zayn crying (JBL: “You shouldn’t be crying at Wrestlemania.”) but he cuts Bryan’s charge off with a shot of his own. Back up and Bryan hits the running clothesline, followed by the rapid fire strikes. Hold on though as Bryan needs to go after Cesaro and Nakamura, only to dive into the Helluva Kick to retain Zayn’s title at 9:18.

Rating: C. Another rather disappointing match here but again, it’s kind of hard to complain about much on this show. The biggest problem continues to be the lack of time, as you can only make a match feel so big in just over nine minutes. It’s also another situation where the title should have changed hands, as Zayn went home because of the virus (fair) and had to vacate the title without wrestling again in nearly six months.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: John Morrison vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Jimmy Uso

Morrison is defending for Miz and John Morrison and this is a ladder match. Injuries and virus concerns took away enough of the partners that this is as good as we can get here. Everyone misses a kick to start and Morrison and Kingston both stick the landings on a monkey flip attempt, meaning it’s an early standoff.

Everyone goes out to grab a ladder (Morrison gets the only regular sized one) and they all climb up, with Jimmy being knocked down and coming up clutching his knee (always a good sign). He’s fine enough to get to his feet but Kofi dives off the ladder to take him down. Morrison is right there to go after Kofi but they both miss kicks and takedowns. Kofi knocks Jimmy off the ladder but Morrison takes him down as well, meaning Jimmy has to make a save of his own.

A springboard lets Kofi dropkick both of them through the ladder (cool), only to have Morrison clear the ring again. Morrison stabs Jimmy in the knee with the ladder but Jimmy sends him face first into the ladder in the corner. That’s fine with Morrison, who knocks him onto the ladder and hits a corkscrew flip to crush Jimmy again. Kofi is back up with a springboard hurricanrana to pull Morrison off of the ladder, because of course he can do that.

After knocking Jimmy outside, Kofi hits a big dive over the top to take Morrison down again. Jimmy tries to run the barricade so Kofi throws the ladder at him for another knockdown. It’s time to bridge the ladder between the ring and the apron, which never winds up going well. Jimmy is laid on said ladder but Morrison walks the rope to get from one corner to another and Spanish Fly Kofi off the top.

That leaves Morrison down so Jimmy can hit a Superfly Splash to crush him all over again. Kofi and Jimmy climb the same ladder (with Kofi climbing from inside because he’s a bit unique) and Jimmy gets knocked off in a heap. Morrison gets knocked down as well and Kofi comes off with the jumping double stomp to make it worse. Back up and Jimmy bridges the ladder between the rope and the standing ladder (uh oh) and then sends Kofi face first into the bridged one.

Morrison gets superkicked out of the air so Jimmy goes up another ladder, only to be shoved down. It must have been quite the fall as he went down with his feet facing the entrance and landed with his head facing the entrance. Or maybe WWE just needs better editors. Morrison throws a ladder out and goes up, only to have Kofi climb the same ladder. Jimmy is back in to climb another ladder and they all get a hand on the titles. A double headbutt knocks Morrison down….and he comes up with the titles for the win at 18:33.

Rating: B. This was the big spotfest match that you knew was coming here at one point or another on the show and there is nothing wrong with that. They did their thing all over the place here with one crazy spot after another. That’s how a match like this is supposed to be and it was as fun as you could have imagined a triple threat match for the Tag Team Titles would be. Granted there is one thing wrong with the match, which would be the horrible knee injury that Jimmy suffered, which would keep him out of action for over a year.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens. Rollins is doing his evil messiah deal and Owens doesn’t want to hear it, nor does he want to deal with the beatdowns Rollins and company have given him. Grudge match time.

Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins

Dig that KO Mania IV shirt with the Andre the Giant/Hulk Hogan style as Owens continues an awesome tradition. After a quick bit of hiding in the ropes, Rollins starts the slugout and it goes about as badly as you would go. Owens hammers him down, shrugs off a kick to the face, and hits a hard clothesline. There’s a backsplash to crush Rollins but it’s too early for the Cannonball.

Some chops have Rollins in trouble on the floor but he manages a backdrop on the apron to avoid a rather painful powerbomb. A Falcon Arrow on the apron plants Owens again as Rollins is already focusing on the back. Rollins hits a hard suicide dive to knock him into the barricade and he does it again for a bonus. Back in and Rollins keeps the trash talk up but misses a pair of Stomps. Owens doesn’t miss a DDT though and a superkick lets him hit the Cannonball.

The Stunner is countered and Rollins nails an enziguri, only to have Owens nail a rebound lariat for another knockdown. A superplex is loaded up but Rollins blocks it, setting up the buckle bomb. Some superkicks rock Owens, who is still fine enough to hit a pop up sitout powerbomb for a close two. They go outside and Rollins blasts him in the head with the ring bell for the DQ at 10:09.

And no this isn’t what we’re doing because Owens says let’s keep it going with no countout or DQ. That’s fine with Rollins and the bell rings, allowing him to hit a jumping knee to the face. Rollins takes it outside again and sends him into various things, followed by a steps shot to the face.

A bunch of chair shots have Owens in big trouble but he comes up with a HARD bell shot to the head. With Rollins mostly done, Owens climbs onto the big WRESTLEMANIA sign and dives off, though he is nice enough to ask if Rollins thinks this is a Wrestlemania moment. Back in and Rollins tries to talk his way out of trouble, earning himself a Stunner for the pin at 17:15.

Rating: B-. I didn’t remember liking this one all that much but they beat each other up rather well and it was entertaining enough. The bell to the head sounded great and the violence was good, once you got part the pretty worthless pause in between the falls. Owens can brawl with the best of them, but unfortunately he got hurt here too and would miss time of his own, because this show is cursed.

R-Truth comes up to Mojo Rawley and Rob Gronkowski and complains about being 24/7. I think you know what happens here and Rawley celebrates with the title.

Paul Heyman scares the heck out of Charly Caruso and talks about how great how sure he is that Drew McIntyre is losing. Brock Lesnar is going to destroy McIntyre and leave him a broken man because Lesnar is the most awesome fighter ever. He gets the message across with a bit more emotion as you might guess.

We run down the night two card.

Smackdown World Title: Braun Strowman vs. Goldberg

Goldberg is defending and there is no recap because there is no story. Goldberg won the title in Saudi Arabia so he could lose to Roman Reigns here, but then Reigns pulled out due to the Coronavirus concerns (again, fair). After about twenty seconds of staring each other down, Goldberg kicks him in the ribs and hits an early spear.

Strowman is back up so Goldberg hits two more spears for a near fall. Make it four, but the Jackhammer is countered into a powerslam. We’ll make that two powerslams and the third sets up a fourth to make Strowman champion at 2:11. The entire match was three moves and one of them was a kick to the ribs.

Wrestlemania XXXVII is in Los Angeles. Just like it was in the Memorial Coliseum in 1991.

We recap AJ Styles vs. The Undertaker. Styles didn’t like Undertaker being a broken shell of himself so he insulted Undertaker the man, including Undertaker’s wife. This did not wind up going well and for the first time, it seems that this is Mark Calaway fighting instead of Styles, which should make things all the more interesting. Oh and they’re in boneyard to make things a little spicier/more cinematic.

Undertaker vs. AJ Styles

The hearse rides into the boneyard and the druids pull out the casket, which of course has Styles in it for a chuckle worthy moment. In a bit cooler moment, we get Biker Taker again, riding to the boneyard to Now That We’re Dead by Metallica. AJ wastes no time in talking trash, asking if Michelle McCool knows Undertaker is out this late. Undertaker knocks a brick out of his hands and the fight is on, with Undertaker dragging him around. He even calls AJ Alan to make it more freaky.

AJ is sent into the closed casket but Undertaker’s punch goes through the hearse window (cue the Goldberg flashbacks). He is fine enough to throw him through the windshield and they fight on top of the hearse, with Undertaker still getting the better of things. Undertaker hammers away while yelling at AJ to not talk about his wife and then quotes Clubber Lang by saying he has a lotta more. AJ gets smart by throwing dirt in the eyes and then trying to punch Undertaker into a grave.

It turns out that standing in front of someone who can’t see and talking a lot makes you easy to punch so Undertaker drills him in the jaw. That’s enough to knock Undertaker into the grave but the Good Brothers show up, complete with imitation western music. Undertaker goes after them….and we’ve got druids for some reason. They don’t really do much good though, as they stand there while Undertaker goes in a circle punching them. Now Undertaker can beat up Gallows and Anderson in peace, including beating on them with the handle of a shovel.

AJ is back with a tombstone (the stone, not the move) though and shatters it over Undertaker’s back. That means trash talk from AJ and weird sounds from Undertaker….and they are both knocked through the wall of a shed. Undertaker wheezes and backs away, allowing AJ to break a shove over his back to knock him into a grave. With Undertaker down, AJ jumps in the dump truck (or whatever you call it)….and Undertaker appears behind him in a big ball of light. Eh it’s not that insane really.

AJ runs off (as you should) and climbs onto the roof of the barn so Undertaker shoots fire out of the roof foo. Cue Gallows and Anderson so Undertaker beats them up again and throws Gallows into the abyss. A Tombstone onto the roof drops Anderson and Undertaker says it’s just him and AJ. For some reason AJ swings at him and gets chokeslammed off the roof and through a big piece of wood. Undertaker climbs down and asks AJ what his wife’s name is. Or maybe AJ can tell Undertaker how old he is.

AJ is out on his feet as Undertaker picks him up and talks about how AJ is tougher than he gave him credit for. It’s time to go to the grave and AJ says he’s sorry. Undertaker wants to know what for and then picks AJ up by the throat. AJ begs him not to bury him and Undertaker hugs him while saying AJ put up a great fight. Then Undertaker boots him into the grave and fills it in with the dirt. The gong sounds and we’ll say that’s the match at about 19:12 (your individual times may vary).

Rating: A. Yeah this is still great and is the pinnacle of the cinematic stuff. It doesn’t get too goofy (I mean, Undertaker stuff is weird by definition) and it felt like two guys having a fight. AJ being all cocky and sure of himself until he finally realized what he was up against is a classic Undertaker story and it worked well here. Above all else, this felt like Undertaker having one last brush with greatness before hanging it up and I can see why he was ok with this being the big ending. Go out doing something different and special, which is what he did here. I loved this when I watched it and still do here, so well done.

AJ’s gloves hand sticks out of the grave as Undertaker gets on his bike, throws up the fist to make the fire go off again. Undertaker’s symbol goes up on the barn wall and he rides away to end the show. And to end Undertaker’s career it seems, as he has not wrestled since and announced his retirement at Survivor Series about seven months later.

Overall Rating: B-. Like I said at the beginning, this show has kind of been forgotten and it is easy to see why. I’m not sure how you could expect anything else here, as the show was cobbled together from whomever was left and they did what they could to still have a Wrestlemania. It’s a Wrestlemania in name only for the most part, but it isn’t like they had any control over the thing. What we got was good enough, but don’t expect this to be anything more than an historical curiosity, because it doesn’t feel like Wrestlemania.

Ratings Comparison

Drew Gulak vs. Cesaro

Original: C

2021 Redo: C

Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross vs. Kabuki Warriors

Original: C

2021 Redo: C

Elias vs. King Corbin

Original: D

2021 Redo: C-

Shayna Baszler vs. Becky Lynch

Original: B-

2021 Redo: C

Daniel Bryan vs. Sami Zayn

Original: C+

2021 Redo: C

Jimmy Uso vs. John Morrison vs. Kofi Kingston

Original: B

2021 Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C

2021 Redo: B-

Goldberg vs. Braun Strowman

Original: N/A

2021 Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. AJ Styles

Original: A+

2021 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C

2021 Redo: B-

Mostly in the ballpark, but it’s not like this is a show that is going to feel the same after a year.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2020/04/04/wrestlemania-xxxvi-night-one-broken-undertaker/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Wrestlemania XXXIII
Date: April 2, 2017
Location: Camping World Stadium, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 75,245
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

This hasn’t been quite a year yet but I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long night. Like a few years before, I was in the stadium for this show but haven’t seen it since I reviewed it last year. This is a show that was well received at the time and it could be interesting to see how it holds up a year later. Let’s get to it.

The set is one of the most intricate they’ve ever done, with a big Wrestlemania globe (ala Universal Studios) and a roller coaster next to it (I think you get this). There’s also an inflatable ring atop the structure above the regular ring, which I somehow didn’t notice until about an hour and a half of being in the stadium). The theme was the Ultimate Thrill Ride and the visual certainly works. It’s really cool looking and worked very well. Unfortunately the stadium isn’t the best looking in the world and it made the whole thing feel a bit out of place. Oh and the CRAZY LONG RAMP, which is something like seventy yards long.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Austin Aries vs. Neville

Aries is challenging after Neville has dominated the division for months and needs someone fresh to challenge him. The fans are behind Aries, which isn’t that surprising though Neville was nothing short (ok he was always short) of awesome at this point. Aries takes him down with an armbar but Neville is right back out with a headscissors. Back up and Neville has to bail to the floor so Aries has a rest on the top rope. I know it’s a Shawn Michaels spot but Aries sells the heck out of it.

Neville comes back in and eats a basement dropkick, followed by the middle rope elbow to the back for two. The suicide dive is blocked with a kick to the head though as the back and forth continues. A missile dropkick gives Neville two and we take a break. Back with Neville holding a chinlock (They even do it on the Kickoff Shows!) but taking WAY too long to glare at the crowd before trying a middle rope Phoenix splash (makes sense given his King thing).

One heck of a backdrop puts Neville on the floor and Aries is right back after him with the suicide dive. You can hear the fans getting back into this and that’s a good result from these two. The main reason to put something like this on is to get the fans fired up for the real show and it’s a great place to put them in.

They come back in with Aries blocking the superplex and nailing his own missile dropkick (looked awesome too) for a near fall. A snap German suplex plants Aries though and Neville takes over again. Another suplex gets another two and Neville is starting to look annoyed. With the technical stuff not working, Neville just kicks him in the face in the corner.

Aries is fine enough to reverse the Rings of Saturn attempt into a rollup and now the Discus knocks Neville hard to the floor. Back in and Aries hits a top hurricanrana and the 450 (with a really annoying crowd reaction shot) gets two. The Last Chancery goes on but Neville rips at the eye (which was recently reconstructed) to break the hold. Aries is writhing in pain and it’s the Red Arrow to retain the title at 15:40.

Rating: B. I remember hearing that this would be on the Kickoff Show and being very relieved as I didn’t think the main show would allow it nearly the amount of time that it needed and deserved. I’m glad to see that I was right here as they had a heck of a chess match here with both guys getting in everything they could and showing how back and forth the whole thing was. Neville cheating to win in the end fit him well, as he finally had someone who could match him and had to take a shortcut. Really good stuff here as Neville continues his unbelievable roll.

If the pay per view started here, it would have been a perfect Kickoff Show. But nah, we need two more matches.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Rob Gronkowski, a friend of Mojo Rawley, is in the front row. Big Show’s music plays everyone but Braun Strowman to the ring. Braun tosses Primo two seconds into the match as the ring needs some serious cleaning out. Kalisto and Simon Gotch are tossed as well and Strowman eliminates Slater. Jimmy Uso and Goldust follow them out as they’re not wasting time here.

There goes Konnor but it’s time for the Show vs. Strowman showdown. Everyone stops to watch but Sami jumps Braun due to reasons of general stupidity. That goes nowhere so it’s Strowman dumping Show. Everyone goes after Strowman but he gets rid of Viktor in the process. Strowman is eliminated, making him look like a loser/afterthought in the process (oh….just wait). Hawkins is out and Ziggler gets to do his usual false hope spot. We get into the required “everyone hits everyone but doesn’t really try to win” portion as things slow down.

Ziggler low bridges Truth out as I manage to remember that Truth is employed. There goes Rhyno and Ziggler is thrown over the top, only to hang on again. There goes English, followed by American Alpha dropkicking English out. Jey Uso and Jason Jordan are tossed, followed by Chad Gable as the ring is really thinning out. Tian Bing gets rid of Fandango and Breeze, followed by Henry eliminating Sin Cara (in some sweet Wrestlemania gear). Henry is out next as there’s nothing between these eliminations.

Ziggler superkicks Bing out and that’s about it for Tian’s career accomplishments to date. Sami’s Helluva Kick gets rid of Epico and we’re down to nine. It’s been too long since Ziggler was nearly eliminated so Harper chokes him on the apron this time around. Mojo dumps Bo and Mahal eliminates Crews, followed by Rawley tossing Ziggler. Harper is out next and we’re down to Mojo, Jinder, Titus, Dain and Zayn.

A running clothesline gets rid of Titus but Dain eliminates Sami, completely sucking the life out of the crowd. Why you ask? Well we’re left with Dain, Rawley and Mahal. How excited would you be? Jinder gets clotheslined down and we get a Dain vs. Mojo showdown. A Pounce drops Dain but Jinder pulls Mojo through the ropes and out to the floor. Jinder follows him out and sends Rawley into the barricade, right in front of Gronkowski.

That means a drink going into Gronkowski’s face and here he comes over the barricade. This gives us the funniest part of the show as a security guard runs over to stop him, only to have a ringside guy tap her on the arm as some referees come over and allow Gronkowski to get in. Gronkowski runs Mahal over (your future WWE Champion everyone) and Mojo’s running right hands get rid of Dain. Another running punch to Mahal gives Rawley the win at 14:09.

Rating: D-. And this just LAUNCHED Mojo to the moon right? I know the idea here was to get Gronkowski involved (possibly as a substitute for Shaquille O’Neal) but Sami Zayn was RIGHT THERE to get the big win but nah, let’s go with the nothing guy winning the match. This wasn’t the best result for the battle royal but at least they were trying with Rawley, who took the time to talk to an entire group of fans when I saw him walking through Axxess that same weekend. Hopefully he gets somewhere in the future. The rest of the match was terrible with everyone being thrown out in short order and a bad ending.

Kickoff Show: Intercontinental Title: Baron Corbin vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and I have no idea why this was on the Kickoff Show. Corbin crushed Ambrose underneath a forklift to set this up, giving us the hilarious visual of the referees trying to LIFT IT UP despite the key being in the ignition. They waste no time in fighting to the floor with Dean getting the better of it and heading back inside.

That earns him a hard whip to send Ambrose’s ribs into the post and give Corbin a nice big target. Or 24 of them in this case. A choke shove puts Dean down for two and Baron whips him into the barricade for good measure. We hit the chinlock for a few moments before Dean avoids a charge to send Corbin shoulder first into the post. Corbin avoids the top rope elbow and blocks Dirty Deeds for good measure. That earns him a trip to the floor but Baron knocks him out of the air on a slingshot dive.

The top rope elbow puts Corbin down again though and Dean gets two off a swinging neckbreaker. These two aren’t exactly clicking so far. Deep Six gives Corbin two and works on the ribs a bit more. The Rebound Lariat runs Baron over again but he’s right back with a powerbomb to stay on the ribs. That’s about it for Corbin though as Dean jumps up and hits Dirty Deeds to retain at 10:44.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one but the bigger issue was with the ending, as Baron winning the title would have made the most sense. Making it even worse was the fact that Baron won a street fight non-title rematch two days later but none of that matters as the Superstar Shakeup changed everything a week later. The match was nothing to see either as they didn’t go into the brawl that would have suited them best.

And now on the main show, which is FIVE HOURS AND TEN MINUTES LONG. Sweet goodness and they wonder why it’s hard to make new fans.

Tinashe, who looks like a low rent Beyonce (still very attractive though with a great voice) sings America the Beautiful. This includes the Air Force flyover, which will nearly knock you off your feet.

The opening video is about how everyone wants to come here, either as a fan or as a wrestler. This is the biggest show of the year and it is the ultimate thrill ride. The video turns into a roller coaster, starting with some historic moments and going into clips of wrestlers on tonight’s show. It’s continuing the theme and that’s a good thing when so many of these shows only have a loose theme at best. Ignore the fans cheering for Miz and AJ Styles and booing the heck out of Roman Reigns of course.

Here are your hosts for the evening: the New Day, in Final Fantasy inspired gear, with Kofi riding in on their bicycle powered ice cream cart. I still have one major question: HOW DID THEY NOT HAVE ICE CREAM FOR SALE??? They teased that for weeks and NOTHING. I was looking forward to it but for some reason it just never happened. After some dancing and gyrating, Xavier says there were a lot of options to host the show. Fans: “WOO!” It was your boys the NEW DAY who got the call though and they get to tell us about all the action that we’ll be seeing tonight.

It’s time to officially pulls their levers (making Kofi and Xavier cringe) and Big E. starts sending the smiling glances over to Woods as he freaks out. This was just after the sex tape fiasco, which was hinted at but never mentioned on WWE TV. In other words, this was a nice little inside joke for the fans while not giving away anything that would be un-PG. Well done and the way this needed to be handled. New Day’s level of rock is confirmed and that’s it, wrapping up this year’s installment of an unnecessary addition to the Wrestlemania card.

We recap AJ Styles babysitting Shane McMahon. AJ lost the Smackdown World Title to John Cena at the Royal Rumble and Daniel Bryan/Shane put him in the Elimination Chamber instead of giving him a one on one rematch for the title. That’s not cool with AJ, so he beat up Shane to set up this year’s “Shane can totally wrestle if you give him one of the best performers in the world” match. They’ve attacked each other a few times each since with Shane’s punches somehow getting a little worse since last year.

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Shane’s kids are at ringside because what would Wrestlemania be without them? AJ isn’t interested in throwing punches so a quick standing switch sends Shane into the ropes. A headlock and snapmare have Shane down as AJ is toying with him to start. Shane gets in some armdrags and takes Styles down for a rollup, giving us some frustration to send AJ outside.

Back in and AJ punches him in the face as it turns into a boxing match. You know you don’t have to ask Shane to do that twice so we let the suck fly, followed by an elbow to AJ’s face. One heck of a baseball slide sends Shane over the announcers’ table as control goes hard to Styles. Back in and a knee drop rocks Shane again but of course he can shake off the Phenomenal Blitz.

The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up and Shane starts his dance that was stupid back in the 90s so today it’s awesome (like everything in the Attitude Era). An Angle Slam gets two on AJ but he’s right back with the Calf Crusher. Shane reverses into a rear naked choke, a cross armbreaker and something like the Rings of Saturn. He trains MMA you see. AJ shrugs them off and drops Shane again but the springboard 450 is countered into a triangle choke. That’s reversed into a one armed Styles Clash, and of course Shane is up at two.

They slug it out and the fans are entirely behind AJ, even more than you might have expected them to be. I know he’s going to be the favorite coming in but this star treatment of Shane is making it even worse. The ref gets bumped (well duh) and it’s trashcan time. AJ loads up his own Coast to Coast but Shane throws the can at him (with AJ having to pull up on the dive, making it look horrible). Phillips: “AJ has stepped into Shane’s world now!” You mean high flying wrestling?

Shane’s Coast to Coast gets two and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. The big elbow misses but of course Shane is fine enough to counter the Phenomenal Forearm into a Maiavia Hurricane. That’s not enough from Shane though as he gets to try the shooting star, which only hits mat. The Phenomenal Forearm connects to finally put Shane away at 20:31.

Rating: B. Well that was Shane, with some Shane on the side and then more Shane to wrap it up. AJ looked awesome but that’s all he supposed to be. This was all about Shane getting to counter and hang with AJ, which doesn’t do Styles any good. A 40+ year old who doesn’t wrestle shouldn’t be hanging with a guy who was World Champion less than three months ago. But hey, Shane, right?

James Ellsworth is having issues working out so Ric Flair comes in to give him a Snickers. Then Ellsworth becomes Charlotte. Uh, yeah.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens. Their friendship had been having some issues of late so Jericho put together the Festival of Friendship, an over the top celebration of all things Owens and Jericho. At the end of it, Owens turns on Jericho and beat the heck out of him. Jericho came back and cost him the Universal Title at Fastlane so Owens is coming for Jericho’s Universal Title. The question became could Owens win without Jericho and now we get the chance to find out.

US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is challenging. Jericho’s entrance brings back the countdown for a nice touch. Throw in the light up scarf and a big List of Jericho on the stage and this is advantage Chris. They slug it out to start with the Walls going on less than thirty seconds in. That sends Owens bailing to the floor and a top rope forearm to the head drops Owens back inside. Owens kicks him in the face and hammers away to take over.

We hit the chinlock, with some horribly obvious spot calling, followed by the backsplash for two. They head outside for the third time with Jericho backdropping his way out of the apron powerbomb. Jericho chops away and gets two off a super hurricanrana but gets clotheslined down. The frog splash misses, the Lionsault hits knees, and the Swanton hits knees as well to give us a slow down stretch.

Now the Lionsault connects for a delayed two but Owens gets in his own Walls of Jericho. A rope is grabbed so Owens tries the Cannonball, only to be reversed into the Walls. Kevin grabs the rope for the break and is right back with the Pop Up Powerbomb for two. Another Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into the Codebreaker but Owens touches the rope with one finger for the save. That’s a sweet heel touch. Owens rolls outside and superkicks the knee, setting up the apron powerbomb to give him the pin and the title at 16:46.

Rating: C+. Not bad but they never cranked up the violence that you would have expected after seeing the Festival of Friendship. These two should have been ready to destroy each other and instead it’s just a match with Owens working the ribs and looking for a powerbomb. They accomplished the goal of making Owens look like he can win on his own, but this isn’t the way they should have gone about it.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match. Charlotte and Sasha Banks had raised the women’s division to entirely new levels and Charlotte needed a new challenger. Enter Bayley, who won the title on Raw in a big surprise, completely defeating the purpose of her character and leaving her with nothing to do. This problem would plague her for the next year and still does to this day. Nia Jax was added to the other three because you need to have as many people in Wrestlemania matches as possible.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending under elimination rules. The tube men are at ringside for a special change of pace. Sasha rides in on the back of a chauffeured car because that’s what Sasha does. Charlotte gets a crazy amount of pyro, making her look even more like a star than usual. Everyone goes after Nia to start but she wrecks them in increasingly short order. A Banzai Drop crushes Bayley and Nia throws Charlotte off the apron onto both Bayley and Sasha. There’s something about people being thrown around like weapons.

All three get together to go after Nia with Sasha wisely grabbing the leg to keep her in place. Charlotte boots Nia in the face for a double German suplex for two in a painful looking crash. Nia is back up and tries a second Banzai, only to get TripleBombed out of the corner for the elimination at 4:08.

As usual, Nia chokes in the big match because that’s just how she rolls. Charlotte pulls Bayley to the floor and it’s Sasha hitting a flip dive to take the champ down. As you might expect, it’s the corkscrew moonsault from the top to take Bayley and Sasha down again in a huge crash.

Back in and Natural Selection is countered into a failed Bank Statement attempt. Instead Charlotte gets two off a backbreaker and rips off a turnbuckle pad in frustration. Sasha’s top rope double knees are good for two of her own and the Bank Statement goes on. Sasha goes with a rollup and the kickout sends her face first into the buckle for the elimination at 8:10.

Bayley comes back in and gets her knee rammed into the exposed buckle. The moonsault, with the wind blowing Charlotte’s hair around, only hits mat to give Bayley a near fall. Charlotte is fine enough to go after the knee and grab the Figure Eight. Bayley gets to the rope so Charlotte takes her into the Tree of Woe, only to get backdropped from the top in a big crash. The big elbow is enough to retain the title at 12:04.

Rating: D. Why can’t they get these big matches right? This was completely backwards with Nia being thrown in there at the last minute and lasting all of four minutes. Then it’s Bayley not really overcoming the odds and just pinning Charlotte after shrugging off some of the offense. It’s not some come from behind win or a big moment, but really just a match where Charlotte happened to lose.

Video on the Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Hearing Jim Cornette’s voice in WWE is just wrong.

Diamond Dallas Page. Nice reaction and WELL deserved just for his stuff with Hall and Roberts alone.

Rock N Roll Express. WAY overdue.

Rick Rude. See the Rock N Roll Express.

Teddy Long. I defy you to not smile at this.

Eric LeGrand. Warrior Award and that’s fine.

Beth Phoenix. Fine enough if a female entrant is required.

Kurt Angle. Yep. Moving on.

Support the Boys and Girls Club! Fair request actually.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

No real story here as this is they’ve just been feuding and it’s time for a title match. Anderson and Gallows are defending and this is a ladder match because we have to have one. Enzo and Cass’ speech is short this time as they say they’re climbing every rung to win the titles. We’re ready to go….and here’s New Day. Yeah remember them?

Anyway they’re in wrestling gear here but first, an announcement. This is now a FATAL FOUR WAY with one more team to be added. That would be the HARDY BOYZ, making a shocking return and giving us a legitimate Wrestlemania moment. Before the music hit, I stood up and said “they wouldn’t”, which was aided as I couldn’t see that New Day was in ring gear. Amazing moment here and the twenty six million YouTube views suggest that it’s quite the popular idea. Cole says thinks are about to be BROKEN and Matt does the DELETE pose.

It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) and the Hardys waste no time with Poetry in Motion to Gallows. Enzo and Cass are taken down as well as the fans are entire enamored with the Hardys all over again. A Whisper in the Wind takes both Sheamus and Cesaro down and it’s time for the first ladder. Jeff goes up but it’s Gallows making a pretty easy save. Cesaro comes back in and climbs onto Gallows’ shoulders for a double stomp onto Anderson’s ribs. Well that worked.

This time it’s Enzo and Cass coming in, just to make sure that everyone gets their turn in you see. That goes nowhere so the Hardys bridge the ladders between the ring and the apron but Cesaro and Sheamus slam them together. With a little too much Sheamus on offense, Cass launches Enzo over the ladders like a cannonball to take him down.

Back in and Sheamus hits the ten forearms to Gallows while Cesaro Swings Anderson. Despite what Cole thinks, that’s not exactly working together. We hear about the Tag Team Titles not changing hands at Wrestlemania in SIXTEEN YEARS (that’s inexcusable) until Sheamus Brogue Kicks the heck out of Cass. Enzo shoves the ladder over to drop Gallows and Sheamus and goes up, sending Graves into hysterics over the horrible possibilities.

Sheamus and Gallows come back in for the save but don’t bother to knock him off the ladder. Instead it’s Anderson climbing the ladder and knocking Cesaro into the ladder. There’s a Magic Killer to Cesaro but Matt hits them both with a Twist of Fate, including a big one off of the ladder to Anderson. Jeff hits the required Swanton off the ladder to drive Cesaro through a bridged ladder, leaving Matt to pull the titles down at 11:05.

Rating: C+. There’s only so much you can get out of a ladder match like this with almost nothing to it other than the big Hardys return. That being said, they absolutely got the ending right as there was no other way to go here. Enzo and Cass weren’t going to work after something as special as the Hardys showing up so don’t even try. There wasn’t much to this in the way of high spots either, but this was ALL about Matt and Jeff, as it should have been.

Jimmy Fallon is here.

We recap the Miz/Maryse vs. John Cena/Nikki Bella, which is mostly about Nikki and Cena teaming together for the first time ever. The idea is that Cena won’t marry Nikki so Miz and Maryse are better, meaning we’re just waiting on Cena to pop the question here. In the show stealing moment of the year though, Miz and Maryse did some parody videos of Cena and Nikki and Total Divas/Bellas, giving us some of the funniest things WWE has ever done.

They nailed the ridiculous nature of the shows to perfection and made Miz look like the guy who should be ready to break through every ceiling above her. Oh and Maryse as Nikki Bella: sweet GOODNESS that worked on about a million levels. Finally though, a year later with Miz and Maryse now as parents, Cena’s jokes about Miz “firing blanks” are pretty much dead.

Jerry Lawler is on commentary.

Nikki Bella/John Cena vs. Maryse/The Miz

Al Roker is guest ring announcer for absolutely no reason whatsoever other than having a celebrity appearance. This is Maryse’s first match nearly six years and she doesn’t look like she’s lost a step. Cena and Nikki run down the ramp and we see a wide shot for a cool visual. Cena’s mom is in the front row and he seems shocked to see her, which would be a heck of a surprise.

The women start and there’s no contact for a minute so let’s bring in the guys instead. Miz poses on the ropes and then bails to the floor to start a chase. Back in and Miz finally stomps away as we finally make contact nearly two minutes in. Maryse gets in a poke to the eye so Miz can fire off a left hand. Cena and Nikki have had no offense so far. The fans are very pleased with Miz’s beating of Cena, mainly because they realize how awesome those Total Bellas parodies were.

Miz misses the running clothesline in the corner but Maryse breaks up the hot tag attempt by pulling Nikki off the apron. A DDT gives Miz two and he slowly does Daniel Bryan’s pose (How amazing is it that the match could ACTUALLY HAPPEN?). The YES Kicks keep Cena rocked but Miz makes the mistake of telling Nikki that she can’t see him.

A big slap puts Miz on the floor and a diving tag brings in Nikki. Some bad forearms to Maryse’s arms (Shane could do better than that) don’t do much damage so Nikki runs Miz over instead. Back in and Nikki’s big forearm sets up stereo Five Knuckle Shuffles. The AA and a Rack Attack 2.0 give us a double pin at 9:38.

Rating: D-. What in the world was that? Miz beat Cena up for about eight minutes and then it was hot tag Nikki to put the villains away Hogan style. After all the work and amazing promos, this is Miz’s Wrestlemania reward. I’m so glad this is what they went with instead of Cena vs. Undertaker, which was likely possible at this show. But hey, Total Divas and Total Bellas got a plot out of it.

Post match Cena says this is what Nikki wanted when she was rehabbing her neck. He tells a downright creepy story about Nikki being groggy before going inf or surgery. Apparently Cena asked if Nikki knew he would marry her one day. She said yes, and today is that day. Cena proposes and we get the big moment as she says yes. I’m SO glad this is what Cena, in the final few years that he has in WWE, is spending one of them doing this. It’s a sweet moment, but my goodness do this on Total Bellas where the fans want to see it.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. HHH, in another dumb story. So Rollins was HHH’s big ace in the hole a few years back and everything was all evil and great. Then Rollins tore his ACL and had to vacate the World Title, which HHH took as not being good enough to be the top guy. Let me repeat that: HHH said that leg issues were signs that someone wasn’t good enough to be the man in WWE. HHH then cost the returning Rollins the title to turn him face but now it’s time for revenge with a fired up Rollins wanting to burn the place down to destroy HHH.

Seth Rollins vs. HHH

Anything goes and, as usual, HHH gets the coolest entrance of the night with a big motorcycle and a police escort, plus Stephanie as a CRAZY HOT biker chick. Seriously, I know she can be irritating but she can rock the heck out of some leather pants. He gets the biggest entrance every year and it takes up a bunch of the spotlight but I can live with it if she’s in outfits like that.

Rollins’ entrance involves holding up a torch and touching it to the ground, sending digital flames down the ramp. I get the burn it down thing but it’s rather lame, along with coming after the really cool entrance. Well done again HHH, as he continues to be smarter than most wrestlers today.

They waste no time in slugging it out with Rollins getting the better of it (therefore I must remind you: HHH once won a slugout with modern day Brock Lesnar) to knock HHH outside. A dragon screw legwhip takes Rollins down by the knee that wasn’t hurt in the first place. Rollins shrugs it off and punches him away, followed by an enziguri back inside. The suicide dive sends HHH into the barricade and it’s already time for the announcers’ table. As usual, Rollins tries a Pedigree onto the table but gets countered with a DDT which doesn’t break the table.

HHH cranks up the violence with a chair to the knee before bridging Rollins’ knee between the ring and the table so he can drive his own knee into Rollins’. Back in and the slow knee work continues, because that’s how HHH loves to work on a show this big. Rollins tries the sunset bomb but hurts his knee all over again. It’s fine enough to hit the Buckle Bomb and a hard whip sends HHH over the corner to the floor. With HHH staggered, Rollins goes up top (Graves: “He’s screwed if he hits this or not.”) and scores with a high crossbody to the floor.

Since it’s an anything goes match, Rollins loads up a pair of chairs and a table on the floor instead of just bashing HHH with the chair. A frog splash to the back keeps HHH down but he kicks the knee out to cut Rollins off again. HHH takes forever to get up top though and gets a chair pelted at his head, setting up the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two. You know, on the bad knee.

Stephanie breaks up the Phoenix Splash by pulling the knee onto the ropes and we hit a reverse Figure Four. That’s reversed into a Gargano Escape of all things but HHH goes smart by punching him in the knee. The reverse Figure Four goes on outside so Rollins reaches underneath the ring to find weapons. Naturally this includes the sledgehammer but HHH lets the hold go.

Back in and Rollins’ knee is fine enough for a low superkick to the face, followed by an enziguri to really hammer the point home. Stephanie takes the hammer away from Rollins though and a Pedigree gives HHH two. The fans barely even reacted to that one and I can’t say I blame them.

HHH channels his inner CM Punk and loads up a super Pedigree but gets backdropped down (already done by Bayley earlier). Now the Phoenix Splash gets two but neither can hit a Pedigree. Instead HHH hits him in the knee but walks into a superkick, which knocks Stephanie off the apron and through a table. That wakes the fans WAY up just in time for the Pedigree to give Rollins the pin at 25:25.

Rating: B-. This is an interesting one I was bored out of my mind watching it live but it flies by watching it back. That being said, the constant knee work got very dull, especially when it wasn’t even Rollins’ bad knee. As usual, the Stephanie bump got by far the strongest reaction of the night because it’s something you don’t see very often. It’s not a bad match at all but you EASILY could have chopped off ten minutes and no one would have missed a thing.

Pitbull performs the theme song and eats up way too much time.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt for the Smackdown World Title. Orton joined the Wyatt Family after becoming tired of being beaten down by the team. Then he won the Royal Rumble and promised to never cash in the title shot on new champion Wyatt. It wound up being a ruse though and Orton used his newfound access to the Wyatt Family compound to destroy the whole place. Then Bray poured Sister Abigail’s ashes over himself and gained her powers as this story got REALLY stupid. There was also something about Luke Harper nearly becoming #1 contender that went nowhere but warrants a quick mention.

Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and has a viper go down the ramp, which he himself called stupid. We get the Big Match Intros and Orton takes him down with a Thesz press and some right hands. They head to the floor for more right hands but Bray goes caveman with a running headbutt back inside. And then the lights go out (which I thought was a blackout) until the mat is covered with a projection of maggots. We’re about two minutes into the match and this is already in the pantheon of dumbest ideas ever.

Bray runs him over again and this time it’s worms on the mat. The referee jumps out of the ring, possibly because he wants to go work for a sensible company like TNA. A Rock Bottom into a backsplash gives Bray two but Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two. I mean, it doesn’t matter as they’ve completely lost the fans after that stupid, STUPID idea but never let that stop WWE.

They head outside again with Bray diving off the apron and straight into a dropkick. Sister Abigail into the barricade drops Orton again but he’s back up with an RKO to knock Bray silly on the floor. That’s only good for two back inside and Sister Abigail is countered into the backbreaker. Orton’s hanging DDT looks to set up the RKO but this time Sister Abigail connects for two. But hang on because let’s hit those roaches to complete the trio of stupid! Orton is finally done with all this nonsense and hits the RKO for the pin and the title at 10:13.

Rating: F. You are the winter, fall and spring. You are the sun that summertime brings. You are the stars in the nighttime sky. You are my girl and I’m your guy. You got me all tied up in knots and I’m lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m just lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m lovin’ you lots and lots.

That doesn’t make sense? Neither does what we just saw. Moving on.

The pilots from the flyover are here. That’s kind of cool.

We recap the Universal Title match, which all started because of a video game. Goldberg came back at Survivor Series to face Brock Lesnar in a rematch of the nightmare that was Wrestlemania XX. In a shocker, Goldberg won in about a minute and a half. Then it was decided that Goldberg could win the title again. He went on to eliminate Brock from the Royal Rumble and then won the Universal Title in about thirty seconds at Fastlane. Lesnar needed to defeat Goldberg once and for all so we’re having the match for the title tonight. This is all narrated by Paul Heyman, who talks about fantasies coming to an end in a nice touch.

Here’s the thing: you could do this same story without the title. Have Lesnar put up his career to get one more shot at Goldberg (it’s not like there was any doubt on the winner here anyway) so let us have the original plan: Owens dropping the title to Jericho (who never won the World Title as a face) and then Lesnar winning it the next month. Nah. We need GOLDBERG winning the title in a nostalgia moment for whatever reason.

Universal Title: Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Goldberg is defending and gets the long walk to the ring which might as well be the long walk to the gallows. Lesnar wastes no time and hits three German suplexes in nineteen seconds. In a great visual, the camera is on Lesnar when Goldberg cuts him down with a spear. A second spear sends Lesnar bailing and the third spear takes Lesnar through the barricade. That’s the first MINUTE of this match as they’re certainly starting fast.

Back in and both finishers are escaped, setting up another spear to Lesnar. The Jackhammer gets two, making Lesnar the second person to ever kick out (the other being Hogan, who only did it because of a missed cue). That means another spear (Heyman: “HE’S IN POSITION AGAIN!”) but this time Lesnar leapfrogs him and Goldberg hits the buckles. More suplexes (make it ten total) set up the F5 to officially conquer Goldberg at 4:47.

Rating: B. This was PERFECT for what they had to work with. Goldberg wasn’t going to be out there for a long match (he didn’t in his prime either) and they went with the right path. This was as action packed of a nearly five minute match as all you could have done. That first spear looked awesome and Goldberg gets to go out on his big moment. I’m pleased, though not as much as Goldberg, who probably made a ton of money for less than ten minutes combined of wrestling time in his comeback.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Naomi vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Alexa is defending and this is the most thrown together match that I can remember in a good while. They’re also rushing through the entrances due to the time issues. You know, because NOW they care about time issues. Naomi is the hometown girl and MY GOODNESS the Glow entrance is a sight to behold in a stadium. There are no tags of course so it’s a big brawl to start.

Naomi gets sent to the floor for a double suplex from Natalya and Carmella. Back in and Becky kicks the two of them down but James Ellsworth (Remember that?) grabs Becky’s foot to take over. Bliss breaks up a cover and screams at Carmella to get out of her ring. The DDT gets two on Natalya but Becky breaks it up this time, only to have Ellsworth come in. No Chin Music is countered into a Bexploder and it’s Naomi coming back in this time.

Naomi slingshots in to sunset flip Natalya, who German suplexes Becky at the same time. Speaking of the same time, Natalya tries a double Sharpshooter on Carmella and Naomi but can’t get the legs up. Well, not surprising, but it’s so bad that the camera cuts to her back. Naomi comes back in for a Rear View to Bliss and a big dive to take everyone out. Back in and Naomi’s reverse Rings of Saturn makes Bliss tap for the title at 5:33.

Rating: D. The timing issues KILLED this and there’s no way around it. Much like the ladder match earlier, there’s nothing you can do when you have five minutes and six people in a match. Naomi winning the title back is cool, but I still have no idea why her winning it back in her hometown is supposed to be some huge deal. Yeah it’s cool, but it’s not like this is some great moment.

Wrestlemania XXXIV is in New Orleans. Those songs will drive you crazy by the end of the weekend.

New Day comes out to thank the fans for the record attendance of 75,245. The team is still funny but egads they could have been cut out of this whole thing and not been missed.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Undertaker. Reigns eliminated him from the Rumble and now we have a match to determine who is the real Big Dog.

Jim Ross is out to do commentary for the main event. That’s even more impressive when you consider his wife died days before this show.

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

No holds barred, first announced before the entrances. Reigns is booed out of the stadium, as has become a custom. In a smart move, Undertaker rises from the middle of the ramp (with a cool visual of smoke building up and clearing to reveal him standing there). I completely missed this as I was looking at the stage and then glanced down to the ring and saw him climbing the steps.

Undertaker slugs away in the corner to start and knocks Reigns to the floor. Back in and Reigns knocks him over the top as well, with Undertaker landing on his feet. Reigns hammers him down to take over and they head outside so this can be more of a brawl, which is the only way to go. The apron dropkick (to a standing Undertaker) puts Undertaker down again but he wins a slugout back inside. Reigns hits him in the face and Undertaker just looks mad.

Snake Eyes and the big boot set up the legdrop for two. The threat of a chokeslam sends Reigns outside again and this time the apron dropkick is punched out of the air. Another dropkick staggers Undertaker but it’s a chokeslam onto the announcers’ table. They climb onto the other tables and it’s a spear to drive Undertaker through (almost in a running spinebuster) for the double knockout.

Reigns is the only one back in….and Undertaker sits up. Back in and Reigns does the corner clotheslines into the corner right hands, meaning the Last Ride (an AWFUL one at that with little impact and more Undertaker dropping Reigns than slamming him down). It’s chair time but Undertaker takes it away and beats him down instead. A quick Superman Punch knocks Undertaker into the ropes but another is countered into a chokeslam onto the chair.

The Tombstone gets two and the fans, who are supposed to be smart at Wrestlemania, seem shocked at the kickout. Off the first Tombstone. In a Wrestlemania match. Who’s the smart one here? Another Tombstone is loaded up but this time Reigns backflips….and just can’t lift Undertaker for the counter. They try a few more times but just stop for the sake of embarrassment with Reigns trying a Superman Punch instead.

The spear connects but Undertaker is fine enough to put on Hell’s Gate. The rope is reached for a break (erg) and Reigns unloads with the chair. Another spear gets another two and another spear gets another two and another Superman Punch (Undertaker sits up and falls over) sets up another spear to give Undertaker his second Wrestlemania loss at 22:57. That last sequence took nearly five minutes.

Rating: D+. It’s not terrible, but Undertaker looked like an old man who should have hung it up a few years ago. The problem here was the crowd being completely dead and it showed really badly. There’s only so much energy you can have in an academic match at the end of a seven hour show. Reigns winning makes complete sense but it was a bad match (the botches and CRAZY amount of time spent standing around didn’t do it any favors) and there’s no way around that.

Reigns gets the big pyro display behind him as he stands on the ramp (great shot) but we’re not done yet. Undertaker slowly sits up and we go to a bunch of replays. Back to live and it’s Undertaker standing in the ring with the hat and coat on. I use that term loosely as it looks like Mark Callaway standing there dressed as Undertaker. For the first time, it seems like we’re seeing the real person instead of the character, which is a MAJOR change for him.

He looks around to the crowd, takes off his gloves, coat and hat and folds them up in the ring. With the fans applauding, he goes outside, kisses Michelle McCool, and walks up the ramp. Undertaker stops, looks back one more time, raises the fist, and lowers down through the ramp, fist still in the air, to end the show with the gong sounding one more time. There was no commentary for the last ten minutes, without even a goodbye (appropriate here).

That’s about as perfect of a sendoff as WWE has ever done. It was emotional, it felt special, and it came off like the real thing. Undertaker is the last vestige of that older generation and him breaking character for the first time ever and leaving is incredible to see. It’s why I don’t want to see him wrestle again and why it makes me sad to think that he will. Incredible stuff, and Thank You Taker.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s no way around it: this show is way way way way way way way WAY too long. I got through an hour of the show a few days back (you know I’m not watching this in one sitting) and looked down at the bar in near horror of how little space I had covered. Five hours, plus TWO HOURS of a Kickoff Show is just too much, especially when there’s stuff to be cut. What could be cut? Well off the top of my head:

AJ vs. Shane (move AJ to ANYTHING else and drop Shane) entirely or at least cut it down by about eight minutes

Corbin vs. Ambrose (I know it’s the Intercontinental Title but on a show this huge, it’s understandable)

Smackdown Women’s Title (it’s just nothing and felt like total filler)

Five to ten minutes each off of Reigns vs. Undertaker and HHH vs. Rollins (those combine for nearly fifty minutes total)

Pitbull

AT LEAST get this down to four and a half hours of main show. That can’t be too much to ask, right?

Other than the timing issues though, the show is mostly solid. There’s a ton of good stuff up until the mixed tag and then things start to fall apart. The Universal Title match was as perfect as it was going to be get but there’s just so much bad around it (Bray vs. Orton, Reigns vs. Undertaker, HHH vs. Rollins in that match that is still going on somewhere, with HHH still working the knee) that the good is dragged down.

At the end of the day, it all comes back to the timing issues as there’s almost no way to make a show this long work. It’s too much to sit through and it becomes a chore at the end. Just cut this down by a good hour (or two) and things are much better, but bigger is better for WWE and that’s not changing anytime soon. As it is, the show works more than it misses but it’s still not a classic by any means.

Ratings Comparison

Neville vs. Austin Aries

Original: A-

2018 Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C+

2018 Redo: C-

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Charlotte vs. Nia Jax

Original: C-

2018 Redo: D

Hardy Boyz vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

John Cena/Nikki Bella vs. The Miz/Maryse

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

HHH vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

2018 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Original: F

2018 Redo: F

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Naomi vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Original: D-

2018 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Yeah I overrated a lot of this the first time around. It’s good, but not that good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/04/07/wrestlemania-xxxiii-a-long-wait-for-a-long-show-with-a-long-ramp/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XXXII
Date: April 3, 2016
Location: AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Texas
Attendance: 101,763
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

As we get ready for the pre-show matches, the place might be 10% full at this point as there was some confusion in opening the gates. There were no lines and it was just a sea of humanity trying to get inside.

Pre-Show: Ryback vs. Kalisto

Ryback plants him off a headlock and easily throws the champ outside. Kalisto gets in a quick bulldog for two but the kickout sends him outside. Some double knees to the chest get the same result and Ryback gets to show off by gorilla pressing Kalisto up the steps and back inside. We take a break and come back with Kalisto taking a hard elbow to the jaw for two.

Team Total Divas vs. Team B.A.D. and Blonde

Total Divas: Natalya, Brie Bella, Paige, Alicia Fox, Eva Marie

B.A.D. and Blonde: Naomi, Lana, Summer Rae, Tamina, Emma

Post match Nikki Bella comes out in her neck brace in what is supposed to be some big moment.

Usos vs. Dudley Boyz

Post match the Dudleyz load up some tables but get splashed through them instead. Cool visual if nothing else.

Fifth Harmony sings a very nice rendition of America the Beautiful.

Inter-continental Title: Kevin Owens vs. The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder vs. Stardust vs. Sin Cara vs. Sami Zayn

Cara hits the big dive to put Stardust through the ladder, leaving Owens and Zayn to slug it out above the ring. Sami gets the better of it and hits the half and half suplex to drop Owens head first into a ladder (sick looking landing). That lets Sami go up until Miz shoves him over but this time Miz takes too long going up, earning himself a big shove off from Ryder, who climbs the ladder for the huge upset at 15:24.

AJ Styles vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho drives him into the corner to start and the AJ STYLES chants are already going nice and strong. Styles gets in a hurricanrana and a snappy armdrag before sending Jericho outside. That should mean a slingshot dive but Jericho dropkicks him out of the air to take over. Back in and a neckbreaker sets up a dragon sleeper for a change of pace.

AJ tries to fight back but gets pulled down into the Walls for some good old fashioned ASK HIM/AHHHH exchanges. A rope is grabbed so AJ can hit the moonsault into a reverse DDT for two. Both guys head to the corner for a super sitout gordbuster and one heck of a crash. The Pele is countered into a Walls attempt but AJ reverses that into the Calf Crusher.

The Styles Clash is broken up and a Codebreaker gets a delayed two (with Cole making sure to say the near fall was due to the delay in a nice touch). For a change of pace, Jericho loads up AJ for the Styles Clash but gets planted face first for two instead. A rollup exchange sets up the real Styles Clash for two and the springboard 450 gets the same. With nothing else left, AJ heads to the apron and loads up the Phenomenal Forearm, only to have Jericho shove the referee away and catch Styles with the Codebreaker for the pin at 17:08.

New Day vs. League of Nations

Dean Ambrose vs. Brock Lesnar

Anything goes and Heyman gives Brock a big, over the top intro. JBL gives us a good example of trying to be too smart by calling Lesnar a former NWA Champion (assuming he means NCAA), which of course he never won. Brock hits the first suplex inside of ten seconds and the huge video screen above the ring kept count (It had been all over the place all night with unicorns for the New Day and various three camera shot replays. In other words, it was annoying in a hurry.).

Hall of Fame time with a pretty good class:

Godfather (So completely out of place here.)

Stan Hansen (How was he not in already?)

Joan Lunden (Warrior Award, which seems to have been forgotten this year.)

Fabulous Freebirds (You could argue they were the headliners.)

Snoop Dogg (Harmless. Not exactly PG but harmless.)

Sting (Only entrance and the loudest reaction.)

Everyone trades rollups to start in a fast and pretty athletic sequence until Charlotte kicks Becky in the face. That earns a nice round of applause and you can tell the women are ready tonight. A hurricanrana sends Charlotte across the ring and Sasha throws in an Eddie dance. They botch (not bad) a sunset flip/German suplex spot before Charlotte it sent outside, leaving Sasha to elbow Becky in the face.

Charlotte poses and gets some pyro to really make this special.

The Cell is lowered for the 33^rd time in WWE history. That stat kind of pulls things back a bit no?

Shane McMahon vs. Undertaker

Rating: D-. WAY too long here with a match that should have been a glorified squash (which this was) that ran only about half this long. The idea that Shane could hang in there with Undertaker under these or any circumstances (including a bunch of run-ins, which never happened), is a combination of insulting and stupid.

The pre-show panel chats for a bit.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Konnor gets rid of Page a few seconds later as this is already pretty dull stuff. The yet to be official Golden Truth eliminates Konnor and Tatanka goes on a warpath that no one was asking for. Corbin tosses Tatanka to no reaction and Kane backdrops Swagger out. The Social Outcasts of all people clean house and get rid of Goldust and Truth. We get a victory lap until Kane and Corbin get rid of Rose and Axel.

Wrestlemania XXXIII is in Orlando.

The Rock vs. Erick Rowan

Rock Bottom, six seconds. Again, I saw this called Rock burying the Wyatts. You know, because people are worried about ERICK ROWAN needing protection.

WWE World Title: Roman Reigns vs. HHH

Rating: D. And a lot of that is just for having the guts to go out there and do a match this boring in this spot on this show. This match was twelve minutes of HHH working on the arm and then getting into the main event style that went exactly where we knew it was going. The lack of drama or really anything interesting (save for that Stephanie spear) killed this and there was no recovering given how long the thing ran.

A quick celebration sets up the traditional long music video to wrap things up.

Ratings Comparison

Zack Ryder vs. Stardust vs. Sin Cara vs. Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens vs. The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: B

Redo: B

AJ Styles vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

Redo: B

New Day vs. League of Nations

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: D+

Redo: C+

Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Shane McMahon vs. Undertaker

Original: D

Redo: D-

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D

The Rock vs. Erick Rowan

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

HHH vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

Oh yeah I was still feeling the in-person vibe when I watched this back the first time. A C- is WAY too generous.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/04/08/wrestlemania-xxxii-strap-yourselves-in-this-is-a-long-one/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the NXT: The Full Sail Years Volumes I and II, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/03/24/kbs-history-of-nxt-volumes-1-and-2-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XXXI
Date: March 29, 2015
Location: Levi’s Stadium, Santa Clara, California
Attendance: 76,976
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

I haven’t watched this one in a few years so it seemed like a good way to go for the redo this year. This show feels like a lifetime ago and is built around Roman Reigns’ rocket push towards the main event where he will challenge Brock Lesnar. Other than that, we have the insane to imagine Sting vs. HHH showdown, which I’m sure will be a mat classic. Let’s get to it.

Before we get into the Kickoff Show matches, an interesting note: since Peacock has taken away the Kickoff Shows, I went to WWE’s YouTube page to watch the Kickoff Show matches there. The Kickoff Show is available…..but the matches have been edited out, despite the talking heads hyping them up. Unless I’m mistaken, the matches aired on YouTube in the first place, so who in the world decided to edit them out here? I’d love to hear the rationale for some of WWE’s decisions at times, because they can be downright baffling.

I say it every time I see anything from this show but DANG that stage is huge.

Kickoff Show: Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. Los Matadores vs. New Day

Kidd and Cesaro, with Natalya, are defending, one fall to a finish, Naomi is here with the Usos, El Torito is here with Los Matadores and it’s Big E./Kofi Kingston for New Day. The outdoor light is still weird to see but it’s a cool visual. Cesaro and Kofi start things off but Diego tags himself in. That’s too much for Cesaro, who drives Jey into the barricade to take him out (with JBL confirming a shoulder injury almost immediately).

Kofi monkey flips Diego down for two and it’s Cesaro coming in as Jey is taken out. Cesaro grabs the chinlock but Kofi is up in a hurry as they can’t waste time here. The Cesaro Swing into Kidd’s dropkick rocks Kofi and Kidd kicks Kofi over for the tag to Jimmy. With four people in a corner each, Jimmy hits a bunch of running Umaga Attacks, leaving Kofi to hit a heck of a dive off the top to take out Fernando.

Jimmy superkicks Kidd for two but a Big E. blind tag lets him launch Kofi into a double stomp for two on Cesaro. Back up and the apron superplex brings Big E. in again, this time setting up a slingshot splash from Diego. Los Matadores hit a sunset bomb/Backstabber combination for two on Kingston, leaving the seconds to get into it on the floor. Natalya gets the Sharpshooter on Torito, setting up Naomi and Jimmy to hit stereo running dives.

Back in and the Big Ending gets two Diego with a few people making the save. Big E. suplexes Fernando but Jimmy breaks up the Big Ending with a superkick. Kofi comes back in for Trouble in Paradise to Kidd and everyone goes to the corner. That means the required Tower of Doom, leaving Jimmy to Superfly Splash Big E…..but Cesaro comes in to steal the pin at 9:58.

Rating: B-. This is one of those matches that works every time I see it because they had a bunch of people in there flying around as fast as they could for about ten minutes. It worked very well because of the talent involved and it’s nice to see Cesaro get another big Wrestlemania win. Really smart choice for the opener here (much like the previous year’s four way tag) and the stage (even the really big one) is set for the rest of the night.

Kickoff Show: Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Axel stops to tear off the Axelmania shirt and is quickly sent out by the mob. Rose and Fandango eliminate each other and Show chops Itami, who won a tournament in NXT to get his spot. Miz and Mizdow (in the stunt double phase) double team Riley for the elimination and Dallas dumps out Ryder, only to get tossed by Itami. Show puts Itami out with the big right hand, earning a lot of booing.

Kane gets rid of Fernando and Diego and Cesaro does the same to Cara. There goes Kidd as the eliminations are coming in a hurry. The Ascension manages to dump Henry (possibly their main roster highlight) but Ryback tosses both of them. Ryback tosses Young and Slater but Titus runs him over. That earns Titus an elimination and Show knocks out Swagger.

New Day triple teams Big Show, who eliminates all three from the apron. Rowan and Goldust are out as well and Kane chokeslams Miz and Mizdow (not out). Cesaro slams Kane out ala Show last year and Show gets rid of Uso. That leaves Cesaro to go after Show but he can’t slam him this time, allowing Show to dump him out. Ryback drops Show but charges into the elimination.

We’re down to Ryback, Miz and Mizdow, with the fans going nuts for Mizdow. The split is teased and Mizdow listens to the fans by dumping Miz and shouting that he quits. That leaves Show vs. Mizdow and the fans are right behind him again. Mizdow skins the cat to avoid an elimination and gets Show upside down on the top….but then Show powers him up and out for the win at 18:07.

Rating: D+. They kept it moving despite how much time it had, but between Itami being completely wasted in the whole thing and the storyline of “Big Show has never won a battle royal” (except he had) and the fans BEGGING for Mizdow to get the win, this was a hard one to sit through. Show would use his newfound momentum (which he totally needed) by not winning another match for two and a half months.

Aloe Blacc sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video is narrated by LL Cool J, who talks about how we have all been connected for years. It has been the case from radio to television to the internet but the one constant has been us. We have those moments where we can all connect to, when we look at each other and say that was awesome. That is what Wrestlemania has done for us to shape our history. These men and women will take the biggest stage in live entertainment to move us and shape us to connect us. This is Wrestlemania. Awesome stuff here from LL Cool J, who sold the heck out of this thing.

Intercontinental Title: Daniel Bryan vs. Bad News Barrett vs. Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Luke Harper vs. Stardust vs. R-Truth

Barrett is defending in a ladder match and this is the result of the rather stupid “a bunch of people steal the title” deal. Bryan is still crazy over, as you might have guessed. It’s so bizarre seeing Brandi Rhodes as a run of the mill (yet talented) ring announcer. It’s also weird seeing Cody Rhodes as….whatever Stardust was supposed to be. Huge pop for Ambrose here too. It’s a big brawl to start with some of the people being knocked out to the floor.

Ambrose hits a suicide dive onto Harper and Barrett throws a ladder. Truth hits a running flip dive to drop Barrett but Stardust dives onto a bunch of people. Harper backdrops Ziggler onto even more people and then hits almost everyone with a dive of his own. Ambrose is the last man standing so he climbs a ladder to dive onto the pile as well. It’s Truth up first with a ladder but the fear of heights lets Barrett come in with some ladder shots.

Bryan knocks Barrett down and crushes him with the ladder in the corner. Stardust and Barrett get crushed in the corner but Harper shoves the ladder at Bryan to cut him off. This includes tying Harper in the Tree of Woe for some YES Kicks but Ziggler makes the save with a superkick this time around. Ziggler and Ambrose pull each other down and then Barrett pulls them both down at once. With Barrett dispatched, Ambrose, Ziggler and Truth go up at the same time so Stardust dropkicks the ladder out.

Harper puts the ladder around his neck to blast a few people until Truth takes him down. Truth busts out the huge ladder but Barrett breaks it up. Stardust goes up but the ladder isn’t in the right place, meaning Barrett can superplex him down for the huge crash. Ziggler, Bryan and Ambrose go up at the same time with Ambrose being knocked down, allowing him to turn over the ladder to knock both of them down.

That leaves Ambrose to go up but Harper hits a heck of a powerbomb through a ladder bridges between the ring and the barricade. Ziggler grabs a sleeper on Harper, who climbs anyway, until Ziggler pulls him down with a huge Zig Zag. Medics check on Ambrose as Barrett has to pull Ziggler off the ladder into a Bull Hammer.

There’s another one to Stardust and another to knock Truth off the ladder. Bryan breaks that up but Barrett and Ziggler knock him off as well. Bryan’s running knee drops Barrett (which is not how he won the title last year Cole) and, after winning a slugout with Ziggler on top of the ladder (including a nasty exchange of headbutts), wins the title at 13:49.

Rating: B. This worked too, if nothing else for the sake of giving Bryan a prize to let the crowd have something to cheer about for later. Bryan is still one of the most popular stars in the company and it makes sense to start off like this. As for the match itself, it was the wild carnage that a huge ladder match like this should be, with enough people in there to keep things moving. Fun opener, which is the right way to go here. Unfortunately Bryan would have to vacate about a month and a half later and then go on the shelf for three years.

Quick bit of trivia: this is Bryan’s fifth Wrestlemania and the fifth different title he has competed for (United States, World Heavyweight, Tag Team, WWE, Intercontinental). That has to be some kind of a record/one time occurrence.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins. Orton was the future for a long time but then HHH changed his mind and made Rollins the new future. They were both part of the Authority but HHH chose Rollins, meaning Orton was kicked out of the team. This included a Curb Stomp onto the steps to put Orton out. It’s revenge time.

Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins

Back in and Rollins gets two off a suplex and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and Orton ducks a sprinting to start the clothesline comeback. A t-bone suplex of all things sends Rollins flying but he nails an enziguri to put Orton on the floor. That means an Asai moonsault can drop Orton again and they’re both down. Back in and Rollins gets caught on top but blocks the superplex attempt.

That’s fine with Orton, who backdrops him down, setting up a high crossbody for two. The hanging DDT plants Rollins again and the RKO connects for two. Security comes in to block the Punt so it’s a pair of RKOs, which allow Rollins to hit the Curb Stomp for two of his own. Rollins has to roll out of a Phoenix splash so he tries another Curb Stomp, which is LAUNCHED into the air and pulled down into the RKO (that was GREAT and one of the best RKO counters ever) for the pin at 13:16.

Rating: C+. The match was pretty much a Raw main event but dang that ending stayed on the highlight reels for a while, as it should have. They timed it perfectly and Rollins falling down into the inevitable was great. Orton winning is a little odd as Rollins seems to be the future star, but it’s not like losing to Orton is some kind of a career killer.

Ronda Rousey is here.

We recap HHH vs. Sting and I’m still not sure I know what this is about. They said it wasn’t about WWE vs. WCW, but then Stephanie McMahon insisted that of course it was and you can’t question her, so that seems to be where we are. Or maybe it’s about Sting being the vigilante against the Authority. It’s just a big mess all around, but that’s the best thing that you can do when Sting can barely move.

HHH vs. Sting

Sting gets this big, kind of odd Japanese drum entrance. It certainly looks cool, but I have no idea what the connection to Sting is supposed to be. That’s a bit too cool though, so HHH gets a full Terminator entrance, complete with Terminators rising from the stage, armor for HHH, and a cameo from Arnold Schwarzenegger himself. Cole: “Wrestlemania is brought to you by Terminator: Genisys!” This is also a street fight (or at least pinfall/submission only), likely for the sake of things not going south in a hurry.

We get the big staredown to start and the fans instantly deem this awesome. Ok fair enough after the entrances. They stare each other down for a good while to start until Sting nails a shoulder for a knockdown. HHH is back up with a headlock takeover as they are taking it very slowly to start. A shoulder puts Sting down for a change but the crotch chop is enough to bring him back up for a dropkick. There’s the YOU STILL GOT IT chant as we’re somehow three minutes into this already.

HHH punches his way out of the corner as Cole and JBL debate Super Bowls (with Cole somehow saying that the NFL winning two of the first three meant things were even). The facebuster has no effect on Sting but it’s too early for the Scorpion Deathlock. Instead Sting whips him into and over the corner but the Stinger Splash hits the barricade (traditions are fun). JBL says this is where you find out if Sting was ever that good in the first place, because you take shots at WCW whenever you can, a mere fourteen years after the company went under.

Sting lets go to beat them up and then backdrops HHH out to the floor. That means the big Sting dive, easily the best looking thing that he has done so far (and one of the best in years). Cole: “WE WERE BEGGING TO SEE THAT IN THE MONDAY NIGHT WAR!” Yeah picture lines like that for the whole match. Back in and HHH hits the Pedigree (JBL: “HE LOST TWO WARS!”) for two, giving us the stunned look on the kickout.

HHH busts out the sledgehammer but the NWO (Hollywood Hogan/Kevin Nash/Scott Hall, all close personal longtime friends of Sting of course) taking their very sweet time, comes out for the save. As weird as it is to see Hogan punching X-Pac, the distraction lets Sting hit the Death Drop for two. We hit the Deathlock as everyone gets in a brawl on the floor (with Nash going down and grabbing his leg, which has to be a rib). HHH finally makes the rope (JBL: “THIS IS US VS. THEM!”) and here is Shawn Michaels to superkick Sting.

That gives HHH a delayed two as the fans deem this awesome. HHH gets the sledgehammer again so Sting backs up, allowing Hall to hand him the baseball bat (that’s a great visual, but I don’t think a wooden bat would have much of a chance). A bat shot to the ribs puts HHH down and another breaks the sledgehammer in half. Sting unloads in the corner and hits the Stinger Splash but a second attempt is knocked out of the air by the sledgehammer for the pin at 18:37.

Rating: C+. I’m really torn on this one as I loved the heck out of it live but egads this doesn’t hold up on another viewing. The huge leaps in logic around the NWO, commentary being a complete nightmare and Sting losing in his big WWE debut (which led nowhere) made this a mess. The nostalgia is enough to carry it, but my goodness they did everything they could to suck the fun out of this.

Post match (and two minutes after the sledgehammer shot), Sting is up to shake HHH’s hand. Cole: “Do you think it has finally been put to bed?” The thing has been put to bed, fallen asleep, woken up and is getting ready for college by this point.

Here’s what’s coming to the WWE Network.

Daniel Bryan (interviewed by a Bushwhackers shirt wearing Maria Menunos) is proud of his win, and is congratulated by Pat Patterson, Roddy Piper (who kisses him on the head), Ricky Steamboat (who does a bad Randy Savage impression), Ric Flair (for the WOOING) and Bret Hart, all of whom do a YES chant. Ron Simmons comes in and says the catchphrase, leaving us to start YESing again. I love these wacky cameos.

Now for something I don’t love: Skyler Grey and Kid Ink. Give us a mini concert of the show’s theme song.

Some troops are watching in Tacoma, Washington.

Paige/AJ Lee vs. Bella Twins

Not much of a backstory here other than Paige/Lee being wrestlers and the Bellas being….well the Bellas. Nikki and Paige start with the brawl until Nikki grabs the Alabama Slam for two, followed by a forearm to knock AJ off the apron. Brie comes in with a missile dropkick for the same and we hit the chinlock.

The BRIE MODE running knee knocks AJ off the apron again and it’s back to Nikki for the Rack Attack. Paige fights back and knocks the Bellas to the floor for a running flip dive, setting up the hot tag to AJ. Nikki rolls through a high crossbody as Paige and Brie fight on the floor. The Black Widow has Nikki in trouble but Brie makes the save, only to get superkicked by Paige. Another Black Widow makes Nikki tap at 6:39.

Rating: C-. Another nothing match here, but this one was at least a bit more interesting as it would be AJ’s last match as she walked away after getting one more Wrestlemania payday. The match itself was just above Raw level but it’s so weird to see Paige and AJ these days. They seem like such relics of the past as the Divas Revolution just completely blew them away (even if Paige was part of it) a few months later.

We get a tale of the tape for Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns, with Cole saying a supercomputer calculated them. It took a supercomputer to tell us the titles they won, their heights and weights?

It’s time for the Hall of Fame recap and presentation for the stadium. Alundra Blayze pulling the Women’s Title out of a trashcan was a great moment. Also: “With triumphant jubilation, we celebrate his name. Finally the Macho Man is in the Hall of Fame.”

Here’s the class in the stadium:

Rikishi (nice reaction)

Larry Zbyszko (not sure how many people today will care)

Alundra Blayze (just call her Madusa already)

Family of Conor Michalek (for the Warrior Award, which isn’t what Warrior wanted it for but it’s a nice moment)

Bushwhackers (biggest reaction so far, though Butch looks ancient)

Tatsumi Fujinami (I’d say he earned it)

Randy Savage (represented by Lanny Poffo, to a nice response)

Arnold Schwarzenegger (not much of a response)

Kevin Nash (gets the full music entrance)

We recap Rusev vs. John Cena for Rusev’s US Title. Rusev actually beat Cena by knockout at Fastlane so Cena is fighting for a rematch and AMERICA. After Rusev started insulting America, Cena put him in the STF until Lana finally agreed to the title match. I think you know where this is going.

US Title: Rusev vs. John Cena

Rusev is defending….and comes out in a Russian tank (where he and Lana allegedly had some rather personal time), complete with the full military band introduction. Yeah we’re not topping that one tonight, or for a long time to come for that matter. Cena gets a Ronald Reagan speech, with clips of great American innovations and sporting moments. The crowd is not exactly thrilled to see Cena here (make your own jokes). They knock each other down for an exchange of early near falls and Rusev gets two more off of a gutwrench suplex.

Rusev hits the jumping superkick for two, followed by Cena’s tornado DDT for the same. Back up and a jumping knee to the head drops Cena again but Cena picks the ankle into the STF. Lana throws in a shoe, which is enough of a distraction to break the hold and let Rusev hit a fall away slam. Rusev goes aerial with a top rope headbutt (that looked good too) but the kickout frustrates him even more.

The Accolade is blocked and Cena busts out a springboard Stunner of all things, which only gets another RUSEV chant. Another superkick sets up a wheelbarrow faceplant and we hit the full Accolade. This time Cena powers out and drives him into the corner, setting up another STF. Lana gets up for the distraction but Rusev runs into her by mistake and it’s the AA to give Rusev his first loss and Cena the title at 14:32.

Rating: B. This felt like a big time match and the power of AMERICA wins in the end, which is all you can ask for. Cena winning is the right call (I think), though the collective gasp if Rusev had kicked out of the AA would have been great. This would kick off the John Cena US Open Challenge though, which gave us some of the most compelling WWE TV in years so I think we can call it a success.

Post match Rusev yells at Lana as the split seems likely. JBL declares Cena’s win a win for everything that is good as we flash even further back in the 80s.

Wrestlemania XXXII is in Dallas.

Long Kickoff Show recap.

Here’s the Authority (HHH/Stephanie McMahon in this case) to announce the attendance record. Stephanie talks about being eight years old at the first Wrestlemania where her friend Andre the Giant (they pushed the heck out of that around this time) made it feel like a huge show. We hear about how globally available Wrestlemania is and thanks the Authority for making all of this possible.

HHH says he beat Sting tonight and he feels like he beat every fan here too, plus millions around the world. They owned Sting, just like they own everyone in the back and everyone here tonight because the Authority always wins. And here’s the Rock to blow the non-existent roof off of the place. Stephanie: “Ok you’re happy to see him.” Rock says the Authority doesn’t own the people or the Rock because the Rock is an East Bay Boy, as he was born in the East Bay around here.

HHH has two choices: go dress up like Terminator again or have a Wrestlemania Moment right here. The guys go fast to face and HHH talks about beating Rock most of the time, meaning he has nothing to prove. Rock says that just like he left his heart in San Francisco, HHH left his testicles in Stamford, Connecticut. That gets HHH’s jacket off and but Stephanie gets between them and says they made Rock.

Therefore Rock can leave, which he does, by slowly walking around the ring….and finding Ronda Rousey (with Shayna Baszler next to her). Ronda jumps the barricade and gets in the ring with Rock as JBL freaks out about Stephanie being in danger (don’t worry though, because she trained for the armbar and could block it when they had their match, because Stephanie). Rock says he would never hit a woman, but he has a friend who would be happy to.

Stephanie doesn’t think much of Rousey because she is a big fan of hers. Rousey doesn’t look impressed so Stephanie tells Ronda to go sit down and enjoy Wrestlemania like a nice little fan. Rousey: “Any ring I step into is mine.” She tells Stephanie to make her leave and there’s the death stare. Rock stops things to warn Stephanie what that look means. Rock: “That look Steph, means that if you keep running your mouth, she’s going to reach down your throat, and pull your insides out and play jump rope with your Fallopian tubes.”

After one of my favorite lines ever, and Rock mocking jumping rope, HHH is tired of this. The fight is on and Rousey flips HHH so Stephanie gets in her face, earning herself and arm….well just cranking because of UFC but it’s enough to make her run so Rock and Rousey can pose. This was great and the big WWE welcome to Rousey, but it would be a little while before anything came from it. Till though, awesome segment and you could feel every bit of Rousey’s star power.

We recap Undertaker vs. Bray Wyatt. The Streak was broken last year and Undertaker was shaken up, so now Bray wants to be the new face of fear. Undertaker: “I’m not dead yet.” This screams bad idea but let’s do it anyway. Three notes here: I don’t believe this aired on the original broadcast due to time (and I have no notes on it elsewhere) and Bray sprained the heck out of his ankle during the intros. Also, the Peacock version of this actually includes the music, which I never would have expected.

Undertaker vs. Bray Wyatt

Bray’s entrance is another odd one, as he walks by several scarecrows who come to life and follow him. The entrances are cool of course, but they lose quite a bit in the daylight. They also take the better part of ever because Bray is hurt and Undertaker is Undertaker, though that guitar solo on Bray’s entrance is always great. Also, Undertaker has grown his hair out a bit and put on some muscle for a big improvement.

After about eight minutes of entrances, including Bray looking a little scared once Undertaker actually gets in the ring, we’re ready to go. Bray shouts that this is his and gets booted in the face before the bell. Undertaker strikes away in the corner and wastes no time in starting in on the arm. Old School connects and the fans say Undertaker still has it. A clothesline puts Undertaker on the floor but he lands on his feet and pulls Bray outside as commentary talks about Undertaker being the best ever.

The apron legdrop connects and sets up Snake Eyes but Bray is ready for the big boot. Bray unloads in the corner and manages a running splash for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit, followed by a ram into the post to keep Undertaker down. Bray is limping pretty badly as Undertaker pulls him into Hell’s Gate, which is broken in a hurry. The release Rock Bottom into the backsplash crushes Undertaker again as commentary thinks this might have been a bad idea.

Sister Abigail takes way too long to set up so Undertaker grabs the throat (Bray’s OH S*** look is awesome) for a chokeslam. The Tombstone connects for two and, after Undertaker is done panicking, Sister Abigail gets the same. Bray spiders up but Undertaker sits up and glares at him with a “boy what are you thinking about” stare, sending Bray crawling back. They slug it out with Bray getting the better of things, but Undertaker counters Sister Abigail into the Tombstone for the pin at 15:12.

Rating: C. It just wasn’t all that good with neither guy looking overly impressive. Undertaker looked WAY better than he did last year, but that isn’t exactly a hard bar to clear. The other problem is that Undertaker is just kind of an old legend here instead of having the Streak be the be all and end all deal. The match was fine enough, but this one isn’t remembered for a reason.

Chris Jericho is going to do a special podcast on the Network (because Steve Austin was out with shoulder surgery) with special guest John Cena.

We recap Roman Reigns (who looks so young here) vs. Brock Lesnar for the WWE World Title. Reigns won the Royal Rumble to continue the rocket push and suddenly was ready for Lesnar. Brock and Paul Heyman didn’t seem to agree and it was time to put Reigns in his place. This felt like a fight instead of a match and that is the only way it should have been billed.

WWE World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and the fans DO NOT like Reigns here, even as he makes the long entrance. The fans even go along with Paul Heyman’s intro of Lesnar to make the affiliation clear. Reigns charges at him and gets driven into the corner to start. Lesnar is bleeding from the cheek so it’s the first German suplex into an F5 in less than thirty seconds. Lesnar spends longer than that stalking Reigns and pounds away in the corner, setting up the release fisherman’s suplex.

The referee is already asking Reigns if he is sure about this so Reigns slugs away but Brock just stares at him for trying a clothesline. Another German suplex has Lesnar bouncing but Reigns is smiling at him. Some forearms to the back set up a belly to back suplex, allowing Lesnar to debut “SUPLEX CITY B****!” As WWE starts printing the t-shirts, Reigns hits some hard right hands but gets caught in a German suplex.

Reigns smiles at him again so there’s another German suplex to send Reigns flying. Lesnar drapes him over the top and fires off knees, with the fans deeming it awesome. A running forearm knocks Reigns off the apron and into the barricade, with Reigns barely being able to sit up. Back up and Brock charges into a knee, followed by another knee to the face. Reigns kicks him in the face so Brock SMASHES HIM with a clothesline out to the floor.

Lesnar is bleeding from the mouth now as he takes Reigns back inside for another suplex. Brock suplexes him back over the top rope so the crowd starts chanting EIGHT for the number of suplexes. The F5 gets two and Heyman’s eyes bug out as Lesnar smiles. Lesnar takes the gloves off and slaps Reigns in the face but Reigns keeps smiling. That’s too far for Brock, who snaps off more German suplexes. Another F5 gets two and now Lesnar has had it.

They head outside where Lesnar gets posted to bust him open from the forehead as well. Back in and Reigns has the look in his eyes and hits back to back Superman Punches. A third is countered into a German suplex but Reigns fights out and hits a bunch of headbutts. There’s the Third Superman Punch to FINALLY knock Lesnar down, followed by a pair of spears. The third is countered into an F5 to put everyone down…..and here’s Seth Rollins to cash in Money in the Bank and make this a triple threat!

WWE World Title: Seth Rollins vs. Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is still defending. Rollins sends Reigns outside and hits a Curb Stomp on Lesnar. Another is countered into an F5 attempt but Reigns runs in with a spear to Lesnar. Rollins hits the Curb Stomp on Reigns for the pin and the title at 16:43 (plus a “thank you very much” to Reigns).

Rating: A-. This took a lot of time to get going but this was pure gold as soon as Lesnar got mad. It was one great moment after another with both of them giving it everything they had. That’s all you needed it to be and it played perfectly into the idea of a main event fight instead of a match. It’s also a great example of some brilliant booking, as WWE wanted to keep both of them strong and needed a way out. For one of the only times ever, the Money in the Bank briefcase was the perfect choice to get them out of the problem they have. It was an awesome moment to wrap up an outstanding match and easily the best thing on the show.

Rollins celebrates on the stage to a bunch of pyro to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. This is kind of an odd show as there is nothing truly bad, but aside from the main event and maybe Sting vs. HHH, what is remembered here? It’s one of those Wrestlemanias that is very good on its own but had almost no long term consequences or impact. You get those every now and then but it still makes for a pretty awesome show on its own. This is definitely worth another look and I had a lot of fun with it, as long as you aren’t expecting any game changers.

Ratings Comparison

Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. Usos vs. New Day vs. Los Matadores

Original: C+

2015 Redo: B

2021 Redo: B-

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D+

2015 Redo: D

2021 Redo: D+

Daniel Bryan vs. Dean Ambrose vs. Bar News Barrett vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Luke Harper vs. R-Truth vs. Stardust

Original: B

2015 Redo: B

2021 Redo: B

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

2015 Redo: B

2021 Redo: C+

Sting vs. HHH

Original: B-

2015 Redo: B-

2021 Redo: C+

AJ Lee/Paige vs. Bella Twins

Original: C+

2015 Redo: C-

2021 Redo: C-

John Cena vs. Rusev

Original: B-

2015 Redo: C+

2021 Redo: B

Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker

Original: B

2015 Redo: C+

2021 Redo: C

Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Original: B+

2015 Redo: A-

2021 Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A

2015 Redo: B+

2021 Redo: B+

Wyatt vs. Undertaker and Rollins vs. Orton have both fallen but it’s still a heck of a show.

Here is the original version if you are interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/03/29/wrestlemania-xxxi-shock-and-awe-shock-and-awe/

And the 2015 Redo:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/04/03/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxxi-2016-redo-surprise/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

NXT
Date: August 29, 2023
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Booker T.

We’re done with Heatwave and about a month away from No Mercy. Carmelo Hayes has retained the NXT Title and seems likely to be facing Ilja Dragunov next. For now though, we have a cage match between the Creeds and Schism for the Creeds’ chance to return full time. That would be one of two cage matches in four days this week because WWE likes to do things a lot. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory Of Terry Funk and Bray Wyatt.

We open with a long recap of Heatwave.

Dyad vs. Creed Brothers

In a cage and if the Creeds win, they’re back in NXT full time. Schism jumps Brutus outside the cage and take him to the back, leaving Julius down 2-1. Julius suplexes his way out of trouble but gets caught with a double clothesline. Some ankle locks slow the Dyad down but they send him face first into the cage as we take a break.

Back with Julius still in trouble but here is Brutus to charge through the rest of the masked Schism members. With nothing else stopping him, Brutus rips the cage door off and gets inside to beat up the Dyad without much trouble. The door is used to crush Dyad against the cage and Fowler gets gorilla pressed into the wall.

What looks to be a Doomsday Device is broken up and Julius is sent into the cage again. Some cage shots to Brutus keep him down until Julius makes the save. Julius lifts both of them onto his shoulders at once for a Brutus Bomb in a very impressive power display. The beatdown is on in a hurry and stereo sliding lariats finish the Dyad at 13:45.

Rating: B-. This was more of a fight than a match and that is what it should have been. There is something amazing about watching the Creeds run through other, possibly more talented teams, with pure power and athleticism. Both of them can just wreck people and it is all kinds of fun to watch every time they’re out there. Just get them something else to do already so they can move up to the main roster.

Roxanne Perez is ready to become #1 contender.

We get a rather well produced video looking over the Global Heritage Cup Invitational. It’s a round robin tournament, set up as two groups of four with the winners facing off for a future title shot. All group matches have a 12 minute time limit and it’s two points for a win, one for a draw and zero for a loss. These matches are NOT under the rounds system.

Tony D’Angelo and Stacks are admiring their titles in the back when Carmelo Hayes comes in to brag with them. The Street Profits come in and show respect to Hayes, while mentioning a blemish on his record. Hayes is ready to get rid of it while the Profits….are interrupted by a brawl between Dana Brooke, Elektra Lopez, Lola Vice and Kelani Jordan.

Global Heritage Invitational Group A: Charlie Dempsey vs. Butch

Drew Gulak and Damon Kemp are here with the Meta Four watching from a box. Dempsey suplexes Butch down to start as the fans are on Butch’s side. They stay on the mat to trade control over the other’s hands. Back up and Butch knocks him down for some forearms to the face. Dempsey’s German suplex gets two but Butch pulls him into an armbar. Butch snaps the fingers again and it’s the Bitter End for the pin at 4:52.

Rating: C+. This was your technical match of the night and my goodness it’s nice to see Butch being like Pete Dunne but under a different name. He has a history in NXT and it is great to see him going back to what made him one of the best things in wrestling for a long time. Dempsey is rather good as well, but he’s not Butch yet and it showed here.

Group A Standings
Butch – 1-0-0 (3 points)
Tyler Bate – 0-0-0 (0 points)
Axiom – 0-0-0 (0 points)
Charlie Dempsey – 0-1-0 (0 points)

Dragon Lee thinks he deserves a North American Title shot but Mustafa Ali comes in to say he’s never had a one on one title shot. People like he and Lee should be fighting for NXT…but Lee already struck out so it’s Ali’s turn now. Lee doesn’t seem to agree as Ali leaves.

Here is Ilja Dragunov to praise Trick Williams for last week. Williams left it all in the ring and proved that he is NOT a sidekick. Dragunov was impressed but now he wants Carmelo Hayes. Hold on though as Noam Dar interrupts from the box to say they’re already on the way to California for No Mercy. Dragunov says it’s very Dar-esque to put the attention on himself and laughs off Oro Mensah’s childish insults.

Dragunov wants to know why he isn’t coming up there right now. Lash Legend says Dar isn’t afraid of anyone so Dragunov takes off the jacket. The Meta Four freaks out so Dar says let’s do this next week: Mensah vs. Dragunov. Works for Dragunov, who kicks Mensah in the head and sends him bailing at the threat of the Torpedo.

Von Wagner wants Bron Breakker, No DQ.

Lola Vice/Elektra Lopez vs. Kelani Jordan/Dana Brooke

Lopez powers Jordan down to start and it’s off to Vice for a double hip attack to the head. Vice’s spinning backfist gets two but Jordan kicks her way out of trouble. Brooke flips Jordan onto Lopez for two as everything breaks down. A spinning kick to the head finishes Jordan at 4:01.

Rating: D+. As usual, Dana Brooke matches aren’t very good and it shouldn’t be a surprise anymore. Jordan is still brand new at this and still has a long way to go. Then you have Lopez, who feels like she should be a star but never really broke out. Finally there is Vice, and she has something. There is a presence to go with her charisma and that could get her a long way.

Gigi Dolin is ready to become #1 contender.

Trick Williams talks to Carmelo Hayes, who doesn’t like people thinking Williams got him the win over Ilja Dragunov. Now Hayes has to fight Dragunov one on one but Williams isn’t sure if Hayes can beat him. Hayes isn’t happy, but as he leaves, Williams says “I know you can”, though Hayes doesn’t seem to hear him.

Dijak vs. Eddy Thorpe

Eddy starts the fight in the aisle and hits a running boot in the corner for two. A suplex gets the same on Dijak but he’s right back with High Justice for two. They’re both knocked down so Dijak pulls off his belt and the tug of war is on. Thorpe sends him shoulder first into the post but gets tossed hard over the announcers’ table for the big crash. Dijak misses a chair shot in the corner so Eddy him outside. The referee takes the chair away and Dijak gets in a belt shot. The cyclone boot finishes Eddy at 4:15.

Rating: C. These two had a hard hitting match but they seem to be stuck in the purgatory that is the NXT midcard. Either of them could move up to the next level without much of a stretch but for now, they’re more people just trading wins without going anywhere. Why aren’t either of them in the North American Title hunt? Or even the Heritage stuff?

Kiana James is ready to become #1 contender.

Bron Breakker interrupts Baron Corbin and tells him to stay out of the No DQ match with Von Wagner next week.

Angel Garza wakes up with blood on his hands. After he washes it off, Humberto Carrillo knocks on the door and says he had a dream about their grandfather. They seem to have had the same dream, with Garza scratching his chest until he bled. Carrillo reveals that he did the same thing, which means they have to start from….scratch. They pull out a Los Lotharios shirt and seem to be on the same page.

Bray Wyatt tribute video.

Blair Davenport is ready to become #1 contender.

Rhea Ripley and Dominik Mysterio aren’t impressed by Dragon Lee. Mysterio says he belongs to Mami and Ripley promises to make him champ for life. Lee and Mustafa Ali can even fight each other for a North American Title shot at No Mercy. Dominik will even be guest referee!

Global Heritage Invitational Group B: Nathan Frazer vs. Joe Coffey

The rest of Gallus is at ringside. Frazer works on the arm to start but Frazer seems to accidentally slam his head against the top rope (I’ve never seen that before) so Coffey slams him down. The referee checks on Frazer as fast as he can but Frazer is fine enough to grab a headlock. Coffey powers him into the corner but gets knocked to the apron. A dropkick sends Frazer outside and we take a break.

Back with Frazer firing off a bunch of running forearms into a swinging suplex for two. Coffey cuts him off with a pop up uppercut into a bridging German suplex for two more. Frazer is fine enough to send him outside for a heck of a dive (which barely makes contact). The frog splash gets two back inside but Frazer misses a phoenix splash. A Gallus distraction lets All The Best for The Bells finish for Coffey at 10:00.

Rating: C+. If Frazer is going to be getting the title shot against Dar at the end of this whole thing, they are already building him up for quite the underdog run. Other than that though, we had another good enough match, with Coffey getting something of an upset win. Frazer continues to be a fireball every time he’s out there though and that is always fun to see.

Group B Standings
Joe Coffey – 1-0-0 (3 points)
Akira Tozawa – 0-0-0 (0 points)
Duke Hudson – 0-0-0 (0 points)
Nathan Frazer – 0-1-0 (0 points)

We’re off to Chase U, where there is no Thea Hail. Duke Hudson doesn’t know where she is but can’t imagine she skipped class. Chase recognized Duke Hudson for being in the Global Heritage Invitational. Chase didn’t know that Hudson was from Australia, thinking it was New Zealand. Hudson seems surprised at the round robin structure. Class is dismissed and Hudson and Chase talk about the tournament. Thea Hail comes in and seems to imply she skipped class. Hudson says they’re off to Study Hall but Hail says she’s going out. Jacy Jayne pops in to ask if Hail is ready and they leave together. Oh dear.

Fallon Henley talks to Myles Borne, who is cleaning the ring after Drew Gulak and company. She offers him a spot on a team with Josh Briggs and Brooks Jensen, so he’s in.

Wes Lee is in the desert and says he wants another shot at Carmelo Hayes, who didn’t beat him as Lee beat himself. It’s different the next time he gets a chance.

Tyler Bate sizes up the competition in his group but seems to think twice at Butch. As for next week though, he’s going to be waiting in the ring for Dabba-Kato, so come be the Goliath to his David.

Roxanne Perez vs. Gigi Dolin vs. Kiana James vs. Blair Davenport

One fall to a finish and the winner gets a Women’s Title shot next week. Dolin and James fight to the floor to start, leaving Davenport to forearm Perez down. Back in and they trade rollups for two each Everyone stares at each other. Dolin plants Perez on the apron and whips James into the barricade. Davenport takes Dolin down but James moonsaults off the barricade to drop Davenport, only to get taken down by Perez’s dive.

We take a break and come back with Perez getting the worst of a Tower Of Doom. The lack of impact leaves Dolin to hit running charges and dropkicks against the ropes until Perez fights up. Pop Rox is broken up by a James dropkick but Davenport plants Perez or two. Dolin gets two off a half and half suplex and everyone is down (including James on the floor). Perez is back up with Pop Rox to Davenport but she rolls out to the floor. James is back in with the 401k to Perez, followed by the Dealbreaker to Dolin for the pin and the title shot at 11:39.

Rating: B-. This was a better match that I was expecting as they were moving well out there and kept up the action throughout. James kind of stole the win but she did it by taking out two people in a row. That’s an impressive way to get the title shot and it’s nice to see her get a boost. The women’s division can use some fresh blood so even a short shot of James is a good idea.

Tiffany Stratton comes out for the staredown with James.

Carmelo Hayes is watching Wes Lee’s promo and goes into Shawn Michaels’ office, saying they need to talk to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Another fine show here, even if it was more about setting things up than last week’s show with a bunch of showdowns. They have about a month before No Mercy and they started fast here, though that tournament sounds long (I can however go for something other than another single elimination format). This wasn’t exactly a must see show, but it started to set things up in the right time.

Results
Creed Brothers b. Dyad – Double sliding lariats
Butch b. Charlie Dempsey – Spinning kick to the head
Lola Vice/Elektra Lopez b. Dana Brooke/Kelani Jordan – Spinning kick to the head to Jordan
Dijak b. Eddy Thorpe – Cyclone boot
Joe Coffey b. Nathan Frazer – All The Best For The Bells
Kiana James b. Gigi Dolin, Roxanne Perez and Blair Davenport – Dealbreaker to Dolin

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Smackdown
Date: August 25, 2023
Location: KFC Yum Center, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators; Wade Barrett, Michael Cole, Kevin Patrick

This is not going to be a normal show and it shouldn’t be. The wrestling world lost an all time legend and a current star this year as Terry Funk and Bray Wyatt both passed away. As a result, I’m not expecting much in the way of storylines tonight, but it isn’t likely to be a full on tribute show either. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a double graphic for Terry Funk and Bray Wyatt (listed as Windham Rotunda) with the roster (including Braun Strowman and also Erick Rowan). Michael Cole is at ringside and talks about how this is for the two of them and we get the ten bell salute.

We get the music video on Wyatt (starting with He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands) and looking at most of his WWE run, including the Firefly Fun House and the Fiend. We see some pictures of him with the other Wyatts and his family (oh boy). He blows the lantern out…..and we’re back in the arena where the empty rocking chair gets a spotlight. Well. That was heartbreaking.

Back from a break and we get a series of tweets from wrestlers and personalities memorializing Terry Funk.

Rey Mysterio vs. Grayson Waller

Non-title. Rey takes him down to start and does Waller’s knee drop pose, followed by a forearm to the face. A headscissors sends Waller into the corner but another is countered to send Rey to the apron. Waller kicks him in the face and slides out after him, only to get hurricanranaed into the barricade.

We take a break and come back with Waller stomping Rey down into the corner before hammering away with some forearms. Waller’s top rope elbow gets two but he charges into a boot in the corner. Rey hits a springboard DDT for two and knocks Waller down again but here is Austin Theory for a distraction. The ensuing rollup gives Waller two and a collision puts both of them down. Cue Santos Escobar to go after Waller but his knee gets banged up again. Rey is back up with a 619 and hits the slingshot splash for the pin at 12:04.

Rating: C+. I’m rather glad that they’ve more or less dropped the distraction leading into a rollup, or at least it’s no longer a near running joke. Waller continues to lose and continues to not exactly be great in the ring. Rey did his thing here to carry it, but Waller might be better off as someone who just talks rather than wrestles on a regular basis. It suits him better.

We see the original Bray Wyatt vignette from NXT.

We get some tweets on Bray.

Commentary talks about Bray.

Damage CTRL yells at Kayla Braxton and call her short. Like Zelina Vega, who isn’t beating Iyo Sky tonight.

We look at the Fiend’s debut. That worked.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Iyo Sky vs. Zelina Vega

Sky, with Damage CTRL, is defending. Vega gets slammed to start but slips out of a second and kicks Sky in the head. Sky is dropped again and Vega hits a middle rope Meteora (with an Eddie tribute of course). Back up and Sky hits a great looking springboard missile dropkick but Vega is back with a DDT. Code Red is blocked but works on the second time, with Sky falling out to the floor. Sky is fine enough to send her into the steps, followed by t running knees in the corner back inside. Over The Moonsault retains at 6:10.

Rating: C. This was a way to get Sky’s first title defense out of the way against a popular challenger and that worked just fine. Vega has that fight until the end style to her and the Code Red is enough of a threat that it might steal a win someday. For now though, Sky gets her win and is ready to move on to a more serious feud.

More Bray tweets.

Here is Cody Rhodes to pay tribute to Terry Funk. He remembers being at the airport in Denver with his dad at 11 years old when he heard someone call Dusty Rhodes an egg sucking dog. The same person said something about his mother and Cody didn’t quite get it. Of course it was Funk, and we get the In Memory graphic.

The people who get in this ring have been called a lot of things, but Terry Funk and Bray Wyatt were cowboys in the best sense of the word. Of all of the wrestlers who said they went to West Texas State University, Funk actually attended classes there. Funk gave an entire company and a revolution “the rub”, and we see the WWE tribute video to him. Tonight we’re getting a hardcore tag match in Funk’s honor.

Street Profits vs. Brawling Brutes

Hardcore. It’s a brawl to start with the Brutes taking over, including Butch hitting a dropkick to each of them. Holland is back in as Butch moonsaults onto both of them. Holland puts Butch in a fireman’s carry for a version of the Terry Funk ladder spot (that was nice) but Ford sends them both outside. There’s the big flip dive and cue Bobby Lashley as we take a break.

Back with the Brutes hitting the stereo ten forearms to the chests and getting two on Ford. The Profits are back up with Ford hitting a nice Blockbuster for two, with Butch making the save. Butch pulls out a table (and seems to offend Lashley in the process) but Ford takes it away. What looks to be a Rock Bottom is broken up but Lashley spears Butch down on the floor. The Sky High/neckbreaker (the Revelation) sends Holland through the table for the pin at 12:24.

Rating: C. for a regular tag math with a table thrown in, it was rather good but for a hardcore match, it was hardly hardcore. That being said, the ladder spot was awesome and the Brutes feel like a team who belongs in such a match. It might not have been the most logical way to pay tribute to Funk, but the fans were into the Profits.

More Bray tweets.

We get a TMZ video with Miz threatening LA Knight.

Here is LA Knight or a chat before his match. Knight talks about how he saw the Fireflies out here earlier tonight. It got him thinking about how your greatest foes can be your greatest helpers. He and Bray Wyatt did some horrible things to each other but it was Bray getting him ready for anything.

That brings him to Miz, who threatened him (with Knight doing a high pitched impression) but was only an afterthought even when he was main eventing Wrestlemania. If Miz wants to try and end Knight, come find him anywhere anytime. Knight hits the catchphrase but has one more piece of advice for Miz: the next time you see him, RUN. That got a heck of a reaction, as it should have. Excellent stuff and the ending was a great tribute.

Here’s what’s coming next week, including the rescheduled return of Jimmy Uso. That makes sense as no one was up for a major storyline this week.

LA Knight vs. Finn Balor

Wyatt’s last opponent vs. the person the Fiend debuted against. Knight starts fast by sending him to the apron for a hand stomp. As we’re told Miz vs. Knight is set for Payback, Knight rams him face first into the announcers’ table for two back inside. We take a break and come back with Balor getting faceplanted and kicked in the head for two.

Balor fights back and hits the shotgun dropkick into the corner. The Coup de Grace misses though and Knight hits his powerslam. Balor is back up and drops Knight again, only to get crotched on top this time. Knight jump sot the top for the superplex and the BFT is good for the clean pin at 10:45.

Rating: B-. They were in a weird spot here as there is no storyline reason for them to be fighting. Knight goes over as he needs the win more and it’s not like anyone is going to count a loss like this against Balor. What mattered here was doing something with people who had been associated with Wyatt and this was about as good as they could have done, all things considered.

Knight leaves and the lights go out Fiend style, with the lantern showing up in the ring and a silhouette of Bray (appearing to have wings thanks to the firefly behind him) appearing on the Titantron. A THANK YOU BRAY chant takes us out.

Overall Rating: A. As has been the case before, this wasn’t about the wrestling. This was about paying tribute to two wrestlers who passed away this week, one of whom was a current member of the roster. Bray getting more focus than Funk made sense, but Cody’s promo and the Funk video were both great. They focused a bit on storylines here but moving most of them until next week is the right way to go. The show had me thinking about Bray and Funk throughout though, and that’s what it should have been this week.

Results
Rey Mysterio b. Grayson Waller – Springboard splash
Iyo Sky b. Zelina Vega – Over The Moonsault
Street Profits b. Brawling Brutes – Revelation to Holland
LA Knight b. Finn Balor – BFT

 

 

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https://twitter.com/TripleH/status/1694840084091023529

https://twitter.com/SeanRossSapp/status/1694865077621359086

I have no idea how to process this one.  Yesterday it was Terry Funk, which came at the end of a long life (and no that doesn’t make it any better) but this one hits hard and came out of nowhere. There had been rumors that he was training to return to the ring next month and then this happens. The Covid and heart issues do make sense but my goodness I’m still trying to process this.

I got to meet Bray once and he was easily one of the nicest wrestlers I’ve ever met. The wife and I met him in Texas at a meet and greet over Wrestlemania XXXII weekend. He heard my wife’s British accent and said something like “Now I know you’re not from around here with a sweet voice like that. Whereabouts are you from little lady?” She said Leeds, England and they chatted about how bad the traffic is over there. When I met him I said something about loving the stuff he did and he said the pleasure of meeting me was all his. Could not have been a nicer, sweeter guy and an absolute southern gentlemen.

This is one of the real tragic deaths in wrestling in a long time and it is a shame given all of the potential he showed and only kind of got to achieve. It’s going to take me some time to get my head around this one and I’m sure I’m not alone in that.

Wrestlemania XXXI
Date: March 29, 2015
Location: Levi’s Stadium, Santa Clara, California
Attendance: 76,976
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. Los Matadores vs. Usos vs. New Day

Pre-Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Ryback gets rid of Goldust but Kane saves Big Show for no logical reason. Miz and Mizdow take a double chokeslam from Kane, who is quickly slammed out by Cesaro. Show dumps Jimmy but gets picked up by Cesaro again, only to escape and dump Cesaro with ease. Ryback grabs a spinebuster on Show and is eliminated for trying to get any momentum.

Aloe Blacc sings America the Beautiful.

Intercontinental Title: Daniel Bryan vs. Bad News Barrett vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Stardust vs. Luke Harper vs. R-Truth vs. Dean Ambrose

Truth sets up the big ladder but Stardust goes for the climb, only to get superplexed back down by Barrett. Bryan, Ziggler and Ambrose go up top until Dean drops down and shoves the ladder over. Dean goes up until Harper powerbombs him off the ladder and through a ladder bridged between the barricade and ring. Ziggler tries a sleeper on Harper as he climbs, followed by the Zig Zag to bring them crashing down.

Somehow Dolph is able to climb up, only to have Barrett pull him down into the Bull Hammer. Another one knocks Truth off but Bryan makes a quick climb and kicks Barrett down. Barrett is right back up though and makes a save, followed by a quick running knee from Bryan, allowing him to climb up, headbutt Ziggler off and win the title at 13:55.

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

Rollins is Mr. Money in the Bank and has Joey Mercury and Jamie Noble as his personal stooges. Seth starts by flipping away from Orton, only to eat a dropkick and bail to the floor from the threat of an RKO. Back in and a big clothesline looks to set up the RKO again but the Stooges offer a distraction to break it up. Orton deals with them early off a double elevated DDT from the apron.

Ronda Rousey is here.

HHH vs. Sting

No DQ or countout. Sting is played to the ring by some kind of Japanese band with drums and a gong. As you might expect, HHH completely upstages him with a full on Terminator commercial with the robots rising from the stage, a clip from the movie, HHH dressed as a Terminator and Arnold Schwarzenegger himself appearing on screen for the introduction. It might be time to call in Robocop.

Sting fights them off with ease and backdrops HHH onto them, setting up a dive off the top (remember that Sting is 56 here) to take them all out. Back in and a Pedigree gets two so HHH gets the sledgehammer (one of at least two under the ring). This brings out the NWO (Hall, Nash and Hogan) to save Sting (SO much wrong with that statement, not even counting trying to remember if the Kliq exists in storylines or not). They take their sweet time and eventually clean house, allowing Sting to hit the Scorpion Death Drop (reverse DDT) for two.

Ads for new shows coming to the WWE Network, including the new Divas Search.

Maria Menunos, in a Bushwhackers shirt, brings in Daniel Bryan. First ever Intercontinental Champion Pat Patterson comes in to congratulate him, as do Roddy Piper, Ricky Steamboat, Ric Flair (of course) and Bret Hart, who starts a YES chant. Ron Simmons comes in and scares them all before hitting his catchphrase.

AJ Lee/Paige vs. Bella Twins

Real people vs. reality stars (from Total Divas), even though Paige had already become a cast member. Nikki is Divas Champion and in the middle of her reign of doom. Paige debuted at the Raw after Wrestlemania last year and has formed a dream team with AJ to take on the sisters.

Rating: C-. This was a handicap match for the first half with Paige cleaning house, which was made even weirder when AJ came in anyway. Not that it mattered though as the Bellas were going to be pushed as the stars as long as they wanted to because of that stupid reality show. In theory this should have set up AJ as the next challenger but she retired later in the week and left the company for good.

We get a tale of the tape for Lesnar vs. Reigns, which Cole says is the result of a computer analysis. The stats include height, weight and career accomplishments. Did this computer analysis take place in the Korean War?

Hall of Fame video, with highlights of Lanny Poffo reading a poem to induct his brother Randy Savage and Connor Michalek receiving the first Warrior Award.

The Class of 2015 includes Rikishi, Larry Zbyszko (mainly famous in the 80s), Alundra Blayze, Connor Michalek, the Bushwhackers (with Butch on crutches but still doing the strut), Tatsumi Fujinami (a legendary Japanese wrestler), Randy Savage (represented by his brother), Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Kevin Nash (for the required Kliq member, though I wonder why he can go in under his real name and not Hall).

US Title: Rusev vs. John Cena

Rusev blames Lana for the loss.

Wrestlemania XXXII is in Dallas.

The pre-show panel talks about the Tag Team Title match and Big Show winning the battle royal. Thanks for reminding me.

Here are HHH and Stephanie to brag about the new attendance record and desperately fill in some time as we have two matches left and nearly an hour and a half to go. Stephanie talks about watching Wrestlemania I live and seeing her friend Andre the Giant (This was a thing for her around this time as she would mention this whenever she could. For some reason this was her justification for not letting Cena be in the Andre battle royal.).

Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker

Ad for Extreme Rules.

WWE World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

A belly to belly overhead brings Reigns back in over the top rope but Reigns shakes his head at Brock again. Another F5 gets two and now Brock take the gloves off. Some hard slaps put Reigns down but he tells Brock to bring it on. Another German earns him another bring it on so Brock gives him suplex number ten. The third F5 gets two more, putting Reigns past Undertaker last year. Brock takes Roman outside but Reigns posts him, drawing some real blood from Lesnar.

WWE World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

The Curb Stomp puts Brock down but Reigns has to spear Brock down to save Seth from an F5. Another Curb Stomp (and a whisper of “thank you so much” to Reigns) gives Seth the title at 16:43!

Rating: A-. They went in a TOTALLY different direction here and it was the best thing they possibly could have done. Reigns vs. Lesnar had little interest as a match but as a one sided war with Reigns giving it everything he had near the end, they turned it into one of the most dramatic spectacles you could find. They had me on the near fall after that second spear and I lost it when Rollins came out.

Fireworks and posing take us out.

Overall though, this was a major surprise and a better show than it had any right to be. The low expectations helped it a lot, but this was looking like one of the worst Wrestlemanias in history and wound up being a lot of fun. Nothing on it really stands out above the rest (save for maybe the main event) so the whole is greater than the sum of all its parts. Really fun show here.

Ratings Comparison

New Day vs. Los Matadores vs. Usos vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd

Original: C+

Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: D

Intercontinental Title Ladder Match

Original: B

Redo: B

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: B

Sting vs. HHH

Original: B

Redo: B-

Paige/AJ Lee vs. Bella Twins

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Rusev vs. John Cena

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: C+

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: B+

Yeah the shock had a lot to do with it but there was good stuff throughout.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/03/29/wrestlemania-xxxi-shock-and-awe-shock-and-awe/

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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 27, 2023
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commentators: Kevin Patrick, Corey Graves

We are less than five weeks away from Wrestlemania and you can see a lot of the show’s card from here. That means we should be in for a good event, as there is time to build things up in advance. Odds are we’ll hear a lot from Cody Rhodes this week, which often works out well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Friday’s Bloodline issues, as Sami Zayn seems to still be getting inside Jey Uso’s mind.

Here are Jimmy Uso and Solo Sikoa to mock the idea of there being problems in the Bloodline. Families fight all the time but if you come for one of them, you come for all of them. There have been a lot of people who thought the Bloodline was over and they were all wrong. So get them some opponents out here. Cue the Street Profits, who shout a lot and ask where Jey Uso is. Trash is talked and we’re ready to go.

Jimmy Uso/Solo Sikoa vs. Street Profits

Jimmy punches Dawkins in the face to start and it’s off to Sikoa, who gets dropkicked backwards. Ford comes in for a rather aggressive headlock until he gets powered into the corner. This is as good a time as any to look at Ford’s highlights in the Elimination Chamber A quick clothesline drops Ford and we take a break.

Back with Sikoa Samoan dropping Dawkins, setting up the running hip attack in the corner. A jumping back elbow gets Dawkins out of trouble though and it’s back to Ford to hammer away at Jimmy. One heck of a high crossbody gets two on Jimmy and there’s a spinebuster to plant him again. Sikoa gets the blind tag though and it’s a superkick into the Samoan Spike to finish Dawkins (also legal) at 11:43.

Rating: C+. The Street Profits are in a weird place at the moment as they aren’t going to get near the Tag Team Titles while the Usos are holding them, but the Usos are only really teaming for title matches. That leaves you with matches like this, which had the energy that you would expect from these four, but it isn’t like this changes anything for either team.

Post match the beating is about to continue but Kevin Owens runs in for the save.

We recap MVP challenging Brock Lesnar to face Omos at Wrestlemania.

Here is Brock Lesnar for a chat, despite the ring being ready for MVP’s VIP Lounge. With Lesnar having a seat, cue MVP to join him. Well, from the aisle that is, as he’s fine to be a bit further away. Lesnar is willing to talk business though and that means MVP is safe to come in. MVP does come in and has a seat, with Lesnar telling him to sell the people on a Lesnar vs. Omos Wrestlemania match.

MVP likes that idea and paints the picture of the Beast vs. the Giant. If Lesnar puts his hands on a man, that man is going to be in a world of pain. If Lesnar puts his hand on a giant though, the giant can fight back. That’s what Wrestlemania is all about. Lesnar is in and the match is made, so let’s drink on it. MVP offers him champagne but Lesnar whips out a flask of White Lightning. MVP takes a shot…..and spits it out on Lesnar by mistake. Smiles and an F5 ensue. So they’re actually going there with Lesnar. I wouldn’t have bet on that but it is indeed something fresh.

Becky Lynch and Lita talk about how great it would be to win the Tag Team Titles tonight, calling it a bucket list item. Becky isn’t worried about Bayley either.

Cody Rhodes vs. Chad Gable

Otis is here with Gable. They start fast with Cody taking over and catching Gable up top. A reverse superplex brings Gable back down and we take a break just over a minute in. Back with Rhodes favoring his knee and Gable hammering away. The Disaster Kick gives Cody two and he slaps on a Figure Four to keep Gable down. With that broken up, another Disaster Kick is blocked and Gable flips him over into a DDT.

The moonsault connects for two on Cody but he gets fired up in the corner. They fight over a hiptoss with Rhodes sending him outside in a heap. The suicide dive sends Gable into the announcers’ table as Otis is busy looking at…..something in the crowd. Cody goes over to look with him and the annoyed Otis is sent over the barricade. Back in and the Cody Cutter sets up Cross Rhodes to give Cody the pin at 10:33.

Rating: C+. It’s amazing how much easier it is to deal with Gable when he doesn’t talk. The Otis thing was kind of dumb but that is pretty much the point with him most of the time. Cody racks up another win over someone with a different style, as WWE keeps building him up more and more on the way to Wrestlemania. This did what it needed to do and there isn’t much to complain about here.

Post match Cody says he’ll be at Smackdown to see Roman Reigns face to face.

Baron Corbin is in the back to talk about how things have gone for him lately but we cut over to Kevin Owens. He talks about consequences, with the Bloodline being the only ones who really need to worry about them.

New Wrestlemania trailer parody: Montez Ford and Bianca Belair in Titanic, with Belair standing on the deck and pretending to fly. Ford drops his phone in the water though.

Judgment Day brags about their Smackdown invasion, with Dominik promising to be back again this week. Rhea Ripley knows Charlotte has accepted what is coming for her at Wrestlemania. Balor says it isn’t over with Edge yet either and issues the challenge for Wrestlemania.

The Maximum Male Models come up to Otis and ask to watch him have a match tonight. Otis goes to find Adam Pearce in search of a match.

Asuka vs. Carmella

Asuka strikes her down to start and counters a kick to the ribs into the ankle lock. Some kicks get Carmella out of trouble so Asuka kicks her down again for two. The chase is on outside, with Carmella getting back inside and avoiding the running hip attack. A superkick drops Asuka on the floor and we take a break. Back with Carmella shoving her in the face a few times and getting kicked down for it. Asuka misses a missile dropkick though and Carmella’s low superkick gets two. The Code of Silence is broken up though and Asuka double armbars her for the submission at 8:40.

Rating: C. I don’t know what to make of Carmella most of the time anymore. She doesn’t seem to be meant as someone to take seriously, as most of her time in the ring is spent running away. Then you have a match like this, which was treated as something of a big win for Asuka. At least it wasn’t too long and they didn’t do anything nuts, but it seems that WWE wants to have it both ways with Carmella and that is making things a big weird.

Post match Asuka calls out Bianca Belair and here she is in a hurry. Belair hopes this is about telling the people how they’re going to tear the house down at Wrestlemania. Carmella jumps Belair from behind though and everything is broken up.

Piper Niven vs. Candice LeRae

Hold on though as Nikki Cross meekly follows LeRae to the ring. Niven powers her around to start but misses a sitdown splash. A release Rock Bottom out of the corner plants LeRae and a backsplash gets two. LeRae misses a charge in the corner but gets knocked outside. Cross offers a distraction though and it’s a rollup to give LeRae the pin at 2:32.

Johnny Gargano is happy with LeRae’s win and is ready to give Otis some hot action tonight. Judgment Day comes in to mock Gargano for losing in the Elimination Chamber. A fight with Damien Priest is teased, but Finn Balor says Otis can crush Gargano tonight. If not, Balor can do it himself next week. Gargano is in.

Here is the Miz for MizTV. Miz gets right to the point: as per last week’s envelope, he is hosting Wrestlemania! We hear a lot of the card and Miz couldn’t be happier. Cue Seth Rollins to interrupt to talk about how he wants Logan Paul at Wrestlemania. Miz isn’t having this so Rollins lays him out, steals Miz’s phone, and calls Paul live. The challenge is on for Paul to be here next week and he happily accepts. Rollins Stomps Miz to celebrate.

Damage Ctrl is ready for their title defense tonight. Austin Theory pops in to say he isn’t happy with John Cena being back for Raw next week and he’ll tell him to his face. Theory brags about his own hustle and loyalty, but now he wants to show Cena all of the respect that he deserves. As long as Cena gives it right back that is.

Bobby Lashley vs. Elias

Lashley wastes no time in powering him around and they head outside. Elias avoids the posting though and hits a running knee as we see Rick Boogs taking notes in the back. They get back in and Lashley his a Downward Spiral, setting up the spear. The Hurt Lock finishes Elias at 1:35.

Post match, Lashley tells Bray Wyatt to keep Lashley’s name out of his mouth. Lashley goes to leave but we see Bray Wyatt on screen, with a version of the Muscleman Dance, featuring clips of Lashley posing. Then things get serious, with Bray telling Lashley to run.

Chelsea Green yells at Adam Pearce when Carmella comes in. Green wants to know how Pearce is going to deal with this but Pearce gets a phone call and has to leave. Carmella and Green seem to get along.

Otis vs. Johnny Gargano

Otis has the Maximum Male Models with him. Gargano hits a flying shoulder to start but gets dropped with a spinning back elbow. Otis misses a charge into the post though as commentary argues about Wisconsin. A low superkick sends Otis outside and Maxine Dupri gives him a pep talk. Gargano’s dive is pulled out of the air and Otis drops him over the barricade. The other Models go after Gargano, but Dexter Lumis pulls them Mansoor over the barricade. Gargano DDTs Otis on the apron and hits One Final Beat for the pin at 2:54.

Post match Lumis pops back up for the thumbs up.

We look back at Cody Rhodes promising to be on Smackdown.

Paul Heyman isn’t happy with Rhodes, though he is reminded that Rhodes never said he was going to confront Roman Reigns. Heyman doesn’t buy it though and Reigns will be ready.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Becky Lynch/Lita vs. Damage Ctrl

Damage Ctrl, with Bayley, is defending. Becky takes over on Kai to start but Lita can’t hit an early Twist of Fate. It’s off to Sky, who gets double suplexed for a fast two. Everything breaks down and we get something similar to Poetry In Motion as the champs can’t get anything to go early on. Becky dives onto both of them and we take an early break.

Back with Becky hitting a double DDT, followed by Diamond Dust for two on Kai. Becky gets sent outside though and Sky hits a heck of an Asai moonsault to drop Lynch. Back in and the champs sweep the leg, setting up a double stomp to the back for two. Becky fights back but Bayley slips a title in to distract the referee. Lita gets pulled off the apron, leaving Becky to get caught in a double belly to back suplex. Cue Trish Stratus to even things up and hug Lita, who gets to come in off the tag. Sky gets faceplanted for two and Trish takes care of Bayley, setting up the Litasault for the pin and the titles at 13:16.

Rating: C+. This is the right way to go for the titles, as Damage Ctrl has held them for a long time now without doing much as champions. There just isn’t enough depth to make the division all that interesting at the moment so why not let Lita and Becky breathe a bit of life into them? Even if it is just short term, it is more interesting than anything else going on. Throw in Trish likely making this a six woman tag at Wrestlemania (maybe at least) and we should be in for a big match feel.

Pyro goes off to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was the show where WWE moved things forward in a big way. They announced some things for WrestleMania, or they at least moved things forward. With so few weeks left before WrestleMania, WWE needs to keep the energy up and they made that work here. Good, well thought out show and they did their job well here.

Results
Jimmy Uso/Solo Sikoa b. Street Profits – Samoan Spike to Dawkins
Cody Rhodes b. Chad Gable – Cross Rhodes
Asuka b. Carmella – Double armbar
Candice LeRae b. Piper Niven – Rollup
Bobby Lashley b. Elias – Hurt Lock
Johnny Gargano b. Otis – One Final Beat
Lita/Becky Lynch b. Damage Ctrl – Moonsault to Sky

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: February 17, 2023
Location: Bell Center, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Wade Barrett

We are a day away from Elimination Chamber and that means this is likely to be the Sami Zayn show. Tomorrow night the hometown boy Zayn gets his shot at Roman Reigns and I think the people might be a bit interested. Other than that we have Gunther defending the Intercontinental Title against Madcap Moss. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s Usos/Bloodline drama, with Jimmy Uso getting caught lying about Jey Uso and Sami Zayn. Hence Roman Reigns telling the Usos to stay home this week.

Natalya/Shotzi vs. Ronda Rousey/Shayna Baszler

Fallout from Rousey and Baszler hurting both of them. Baszler cranks on Natalya’s arm to start and it’s quickly off to Rousey for another battle over arm control. Shotzi comes in to actually take Rousey down, setting up Cattle Mutilation of all things. Rousey powers out but gets sent outside, allowing Shotzi to hit a pretty hard dive. With Natalya adding a clothesline, Shotzi dives onto both villains as we take a break.

Back with Shotzi still in trouble but managing to send Baszler outside. A scary looking DDT on the apron plants Rousey and it’s off to Natalya to clean house. Natalya German suplexes Baszler and gets the Sharpshooter on Rousey. Baszler makes the save but gets sent outside, leaving Rousey to armbar Shotzi for the tap at 12:05.

Rating: C+. They were working hard here and it showed well. Rousey and Baszler are looking like the next big thing in the tag division (assuming there is one) and racking up wins, even like this one, is a good way to go. They weren’t going to beat Natalya the day before Elimination Chamber so they even got the result right.

Long video on the history of Sami Zayn and the Bloodline. This really has been a pretty epic story.

Here is Hit Row to complain about how Montreal didn’t like them the last time they were in this city. They issue what seems to be an open challenge so here are Bray Wyatt and Uncle Howdy to wipe the team out. Bray: “You’re welcome Montreal.” With that out of the way, Bray talks about….Brock Lesnar vs. Bobby Lashley? Whoever wins should run. Well that comes out of nowhere and in a good way.

We look at Madcap Moss becoming #1 contender to the Intercontinental Title.

Emma is proud of Moss for winning and it’s time for people to learn that he is a superstar.

Combat sports journalist and hometown boy Ariel Helwani is in the crowd, saying they are happy to see Sami Zayn return home tonight.

Sheamus/Drew McIntyre vs. Viking Raiders

Valhalla is here with the Vikings. They go straight to the brawl to start with the Raiders being cleared out to send us to a break. Back with Sheamus fighting out of a chinlock but getting choked on the apron instead. A clothesline gets Sheamus out of trouble though and the hot tag brings in McIntyre for the neckbreakers. Everything breaks down and the Glasgow Kiss hits Erik. Sheamus comes in and hits a super Regal Roll to Ivar for the huge crash.

We take another break and come back again with McIntyre planting Ivar and Sheamus adding a top rope knee for two. The Brogue Kick misses though and Sheamus gets powerbombed. Erik goes up but dives onto raised knees, allowing the hot tag to McIntyre to clean house. McIntyre gets caught on top for a super World’s Strongest Slam though and the Superfly Splash gives Ivar two. Ragnarok is broken up by a Brogue Kick though and the Claymore finishes Erik at 17:06.

Rating: B. Sometimes you need four big, strong guys to beat the fire out of each other for a little while and that is exactly what you got here. Sheamus and McIntyre are the kind of team who could be Tag Team Champions one day so keeping them strong somewhat early in their run together is the right move.

We look at more on Sami Zayn vs. the Bloodline, including Sami finally turning on them at the Royal Rumble.

We look at Rey Mysterio and Santos Escobar showing respect last week after the show ended.

Mysterio talks about how great that was when Karrion Kross, with Scarlett, comes in. Kross said he once wanted to be a father, but then saw how Dominik Mysterio turned out. If Rey wants to fight again, Kross is ready.

Asuka vs. Liv Morgan

Carmella is on commentary. Asuka takes Morgan down and works on the arm as Raquel Rodriguez comes out to yell at Carmella. Nikki Cross jumps out of the crowd and sits on Wade Barrett’s lap (Barrett: “I am going to be in so much trouble when I get home.”) as Morgan hits a quick Oblivion for two. We take a break and come back with a glare off until Asuka fires off strikes to the head. A springboard Codebreaker looks to set up Oblivion but Asuka goes for the arm instead. The armbar makes Morgan tap at 8:35.

Rating: C. Asuka is looking like one of the favorites to win the Chamber so giving her the win here makes sense. Morgan’s fall from championship status continues as the experiment seems to have come to a rather crashing halt. She still belongs in a #1 contenders match, but Asuka or Rodriguez seem to be the top prospects to go on to Wrestlemania.

Post match all of the women in the Chamber, including Natalya, come in for the parade of knockdowns, with Asuka standing tall.

Gunther promises to keep the Intercontinental Title from Madcap Moss.

Intercontinental Title: Madcap Moss vs. Gunther

Gunther, with Imperium, is defending and Emma is here with Moss. Gunther’s headlock takeover doesn’t get him very far so he comes back with the hard chop instead. There’s the big boot for two but Moss knocks him into the corner for some running shoulders to the ribs. A spinebuster and running shoulder put Gunther on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Moss slipping out of a powerbomb but not being able to hit the Punchline. The sleeper is broken up with a belly to back suplex and Moss hits a hard running clothesline for two more. Moss blocks another sleeper attempt and catches Gunther on top with a super fall away slam for two. Now the sleeper goes on and Moss is staggered, allowing Gunther to hit the powerbomb to retain at 10:20.

Rating: C+. There is only so much you can do in a match where the champion never feels like he is in danger and that was the case here. Moss is becoming a more serious star and that is a great thing for him (just change the first name already) but it is going to take something special to beat Gunther. As far as Moss has come, he was in way over his head here but did fairly well in spite of it.

Here is Sami Zayn to the huge hometown reception and yes he has the old theme back. The ovation goes on for a long time and Sami starts to cry, with the YOU DESERVE IT chants making it worse. The fans give him the OLE chant as Sami has been in the ring for almost five minutes and not been able to say the first word.

Sami finally says that this time of year, everybody points to one thing, because Wrestlemania is the most important show of the year. But for this city, tomorrow night is once in a lifetime. Sami addresses Roman Reigns in French, saying tomorrow night it’s Reigns vs. Sami and the City of Montreal. Reigns is going down. This was incredible and one of the more emotional things you’ll see from WWE. I know Zayn has about a sliver of a chance to win the title, but WWE better have the jet in the parking lot to get the Bloodline out of Montreal after Sami loses before they get ripped to pieces.

Overall Rating: B. Maybe it’s just being fired up by that ending, but I’m wanting to see Elimination Chamber a lot more than I was coming in. The card is stacked and while the Raw side is better overall, the Smackdown half should be rather adequate. This show did a solid job of making me more interested and that is exactly what it was supposed to do.

Results
Ronda Rousey/Shayna Baszler b. Natalya/Shotzi – Armbar
Sheamus/Drew McIntyre b. Viking Raiders – Brogue Kick to Erik
Asuka b. Liv Morgan – Armbar
Gunther b. Madcap Moss – Powerbomb

 

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