Anybody remember them?Aside from Daniel Bryan, what did the original Nexus ever accomplish?  Think about it.  Of the main seven guys on the team, here are their career accomplishments:

4 Intercontinental Titles

5 Tag Titles

That’s it.  Of the original seven (Barrett, Sheffield, Young, Otunga, Tarver, Slater, Gabriel) plus Harris and McGillicutty that’s all they’ve won in their entire WWE careers.  Those guys debuted almost four years ago and have a resume that Chris Jericho probably accomplished in a two year stretch.  They never won anything significant while they were a team and once Barrett lost his title shot they were done completely.

It’s really kind of astounding that they were THE story for four to six months and had practically no lasting impact at all.  Even once Punk took over the group they didn’t do anything as Orton knocked them out one by one in about six weeks.  Even the Dungeon of Doom had more accomplishments than this.  At the end of the day, the fact that most of them sound like they belong in a cubicle at an accounting firm and had character traits that felt like they were pulled out of a fishbowl and assigned to each member (among other things) crippled them.  It’s a great lesson in what happens when you put no effort into characters at all.

They’re the boy band of wrestling: big deal for awhile, people kind of remember them, one guy means anything today.

This was one of those special shows that sticks with you for awhile after it’s over and that’s exactly what WWE needed right now.

To begin with, Hulk Hogan returned to announce that he will be hosting Wrestlemania XXX. I know a lot of people haven’t been pleased with Hogan due to all of the nonsense in TNA, but at the end of the day he has to be at a major Wrestlemania. Yes he’s old, not in ring shape and can’t remember a basic line like WWE Network, but HE’S HULK HOGAN. He was the hero to a lot of children over a generation including myself. He’ll be around in the coming weeks and will probably use his powers before then so things will be fine. It’s a great moment and just felt right.

Next up we had the first of the How To guides for the Network. There were several of them last night but they were far less obnoxious than the WWE Apps ones. Also you have to expect these as it’s actually a big deal for a change instead of the stupid App. This was fine and they’ll be fine over the upcoming months.

Batista and Del Rio had a rematch from Sunday and surprisingly enough, Batista got pinned. Yeah it was off a distraction, but it was his second singles match back in the company. The crowd still didn’t want to see Batista, but at least the promo after the match gave signs of hope. Batista isn’t going to work as a face and at least the company seems to have caught on to that idea. They’re not going to do a heel vs. heel title match though, leaving a few distinct possibilities for Wrestlemania.

They could turn Orton, but he’s come off as such a spineless coward when dealing with the Authority that I don’t think it’s going to work. The other big option is to add someone else to the match to make it a triple threat. The only two serious options are Punk and Bryan, but Daniel seems to be locked into a HHH match and Punk might not even be on the show. For the life of me I can’t imagine Batista and Orton getting a one on one match, but stranger things have happened. I can’t think of any at the moment but I’m sure they have.

Big E. survived against Cesaro but it was a good example of a match where both guys looked good. It also looked to set up the Real Americans split due to Swagger costing Cesaro a potential win (emphasis on the word potential, as Cesaro was going to set up the Neutralizer but hadn’t knocked Big E. out yet). Cesaro needs to beat Swagger at Wrestlemania and split from Colter, but it would only destroy Swagger even more. He needs to do something but that’s been the case for years.

Cena and the Wyatts were up next in a match that we’ve known was coming for at least a month now. The storyline coming in seems to be a (fake) knee injury for Cena which is a basic idea that has been done before but still works wonders if done right. Cena vs. the Wyatts is going to depend on how serious John takes it. If he treats them like the monsters they are and acts cautious but serious he’ll be fine. On the other hand, if he treats them as goofy guys who wear weird close and have insane hair, the feud is going to come off as a joke, even if Wyatt wins. Thankfully it was Serious Cena on Monday so I’m cautiously optimistic.

The interesting thing here though is how the WWE has kind of booked themselves into a corner. After Sunday, the logical match would seem to be Shield vs. Wyatts II in a gimmick match (elimination tag maybe?) but instead we’re getting Cena vs. Wyatt. Now that being said, the singles match will be fine but it’s not the match that the people seem to be clamoring for. Wyatt beating Cena on the biggest stage of them all will be great for his career but it’s not great for short term booking.

Christian vs. Sheamus was fine, but it’s clear that Christian is not going to be anything more than he is right now and that his time is winding down. The match wasn’t bad but Sheamus was carrying him for the most part. I’m not sure where these two go at Wrestlemania, but there’s a chance the two of them will have a match that no one wants to see.

Ambrose and Reigns having an argument would seem to foreshadow a match at Wrestlemania, but I’m hoping Reigns doesn’t get the title. He’s too good for that kind of a burial.

I’m glad we got Bryan vs. Kane out of the way. Those two have been in a story for over a year and a half now and they needed to have a blowoff match. I didn’t buy the idea that it was happening at Wrestlemania and having it here on Raw was the right call. Bryan got the pin with the running knee and then challenged HHH to a match at Wrestlemania. No it isn’t the title match, but it makes the most sense with the story they’ve been telling. Believe it or not the best move would actually be Bryan beating HHH for the title, but that’s opening up a can of worms that isn’t worth the payoff.

One more note: get the undershirt off Kane. He looks like Marlon Brando from Streetcar Named Desire.

Emma and Summer Rae….happened. That’s really the only way to describe it. Emma is getting better but Santino continues to take the focus off of her. Why is she stuck in this dancers feud when AJ is desperate for ANY competition? If nothing else they’ve got Emma in her ring gear, which is always going to get a better pop than being mostly covered up like she’s been since debuting.

As I saw in another review: the Usos and Outlaws need to watch the Hart Foundation vs. the Bolsheviks from Wrestlemania VI. Thankfully the Usos getting the titles seems to still be happening.

Bray and Roman had their singles match and it ended the only way it could have. It wasn’t a classic or anything but it was a match in the last hour of a huge show in Wisconsin. Give them a build with an atmosphere on a bigger stage and the quality goes up. Reigns needs more ring time on his own though.

That brings us to the big ending of the show. Again, Lesnar vs. Undertaker was pretty much set in stone months ago but the match was still awesome. I’d like to remind you of something: HE STABBED HIM WITH THE PEN. For the first time in years Undertaker is the aggressor in a feud and that’s an idea I can get behind. It might have been seventeen years ago, but go back and watch his stuff from the Attitude Era. Undertaker is at his best when he just starts breaking stuff and it’s even better when he breaks them with people’s bodies. I’m not sure if Undertaker can keep up with Lesnar’s physical style, but the build is going to be fun.

Raw this week was supposed to be a big show and it worked like a charm. At the end of the show I was ready for Wrestlemania for the first time this year and that’s exactly what it was supposed to do. There are still five weeks to adjust some things and the main event is still up in the air, but the rest of the card looks solid from here. It looks more like Wrestlemania XIX than Wrestlemania XVII, but that’s not the worst thing in the world.

One of the most interesting things last night was the amount of ring time the matches got. We had four matches break fourteen minutes and another that got ten. There were almost no recaps or stupid backstage segments and the show worked far better. I’m not saying there’s no place for a backstage bit here and there, but we don’t need to see these long drawn out segments to reenforce stuff that’s already been made.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 24, 2014
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

To say tonight is a stacked card is an understatement. First and foremost we have a slew of returning stars, including Hulk Hogan, Brock Lesnar, Shawn Michaels and potentially Undertaker. It’s also the night after Elimination Chamber which saw a masterpiece between Shield and the Wyatt Family and Randy Orton retaining the WWE Title inside the Chamber. The interesting thing is what happens with Daniel Bryan, who was screwed out of the title again, leading to a tirade from Michael Cole about how it has to stop. Let’s get to it.

We open with the return of Hulk Hogan to a very nice reaction. He soaks it in….and almost immediately screws up his lines, saying the WWE Universe has officially launched. Hogan almost saves it by saying the Universe launched the Network. He talks about his career making a turn as he’s coming home to be the official host of Wrestlemania XXX. So whatcha gonna do when Hulkamania runs wild on you brother?

The announcers show us how to use the Network on various platforms.

Batista vs. Alberto Del Rio

The reaction is somehow even worse than last night. Batista points out one of the Boo-Tista signs in the crowd with a little smirk. Dave pounds him into the corner with right hands to start and a clothesline sends Del Rio outside. Alberto goes back first into the apron before being sent back inside for a suplex. Batista clotheslines him back to the floor but Del Rio trips him up and drops him on the apron. Del Rio sends him into the steps as Lawler talks about the reaction at the Rumble, coming to the logical conclusion of the fans just wanted to see Bryan.

Back from a break with Del Rio stomping on Batista in the ring. Batista comes back with some shots of his own and takes Del Rio down with some clotheslines. A Codebreaker on the arm puts Batista on the mat but he ducks the low superkick and avoids the charge in the corner. There’s the spinebuster but here’s Randy Orton as well, allowing Del Rio to roll Batista up for the pin at 10:17.

Rating: D+. This felt more like an angle than a match and at this point that’s the best thing that can happen to Batista. Del Rio hasn’t been bad lately but the fans are going to cheer anyone that’s against Batista right now. The match didn’t have time to go anywhere with most of it being in a commercial.

Randy calls that one of the funniest things he’s ever seen before talking about the fans rejecting Batista ever since he came back. He thinks Batista must regret returning but Batista says Orton couldn’t be more wrong. Batista loves this business and the fans have their own voice. However, he has his own voice too and will boo them right back. He’ll be going to Wrestlemania to fight one of his former friends and taking the title, so deal with it.

Cesaro vs. Big E.

Non-title. Big E. quickly runs him over with a shoulder but Cesaro comes back with a series of knees to the ribs. A very nice overhead belly to belly sends Cesaro flying and some running shoulders in the corner are good for two. Back up and they collide before Cesaro kicks Big E. in the face to take over. We hit the chinlock for a bit before a series of backbreakers put Cesaro down. Cesaro puts him down with a headlock as JBL and Cole have an unfunny conversation about what the E. stands for. Cesaro catches a charging Big E. in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker as we take a break.

Back with Cesaro holding a chinlock but Big E. fights up for a gorilla press. He misses a charge into the post though and Cesaro pounds away in the corner before putting on a chinlock. A big powerslam gets two on E. and Cesaro tells Colter he’s got it. We hit the chinlock again but Big E. fights up, only to get caught in a sleeper. He rolls free and slams Cesaro down before taking off the straps.

Cesaro escapes the Big Ending and somehow hits Swiss Death for a VERY close two. The Swing is countered and Big E. hits something like a Rock Bottom out of the corner. Big E. is sent to the floor but he has to run over Swagger, allowing Cesaro to Swing the champion. Cesaro looks to set up the Neutralizer but Swagger comes in for the DQ at 15:50.

Rating: C+. This was a match with two big guys beating the tar out of each other for fifteen minutes and you can’t screw something like that up. Cesaro is an absolute freak but Big E. was more than holding his own out there. The Real Americans need to split already as Cesaro is ready to make a big jump but Swagger is holding him down.

Post match Big E. goes after Jack but Cesaro jumps him from behind and hits the Neutralizer.

Stills of the Chamber and the Wyatts costing Cena the match.

Here’s Cena to finally address the Wyatts. First off though, he says how great it is to see Hulk Hogan back where he belongs. Over the last few weeks Cena has been saying that anyone who wants to get to the top of the WWE has to go through him. The fans are of course split and Cena is of course cool with that idea. This brings him to Bray Wyatt, who has caused quite a stir since he showed up around here.

Last night Cena came face to face with Bray Wyatt and Bray cost him a championship match. That was a bold move and John Cena is right here if Bray wants to make another bold move. Here’s the whole Family to respond but Bray sits in his chair in the aisle. He says this world has an infection and a virus known as the human race. Through all of these times it makes sense that Cena would put himself right in the middle of all of them. What would the world be without its hero or its knight in shining hero?

John Cena is full of empty promises because he can’t save these people from this terrible world. Cena says the future has to come through him and Bray couldn’t agree more. Wyatt introduces himself to Cena and they are the reapers who bring death to this era of lies. Cena introduces himself as well and says if one of them comes into this ring, they’re starting something they might not be able to finish.

The monsters storm the ring and the numbers are too much for Cena. Bray pulls the Family back as Cena is favoring his left leg. Cena charges at them anyway but they’re just too bit. He’s holding that knee almost the entire time. John gets up again and the Family walks away but Cena can barely walk. He has to chase off Rowan, allowing Bray to run Cena over again. Follow the buzzards.

Cena was stretchered out during the break.

Christian vs. Sheamus

This was set up on the pre-show by Brad Maddox due to the two of them having issues since Smackdown on Friday. Christian is quickly sent to the floor but he comes back in with some right hands. Sheamus is fine with that and takes Christian into the corner for some clubbing forearms. A clothesline gets two on the Canadian and we hit a chinlock. Christian tries to wrap Sheamus’ leg around the post but Sheamus pull him face first into the steel instead. Christian counters the ten forearms to the chest and scores with a missile dropkick for two. Sheamus backdrops him to the floor and hits a shoulder off the apron as we take a break.

Back with Christian shoving Sheamus off the top and to the floor before ramming him into the steps. Christian stomps away in the corner before putting on a body vice to work over Sheamus’ bad ribs. Cole tells us that Cena’s injury is to his knee and it’s swollen pretty badly. Christian puts on an abdominal stretch but Sheamus elbows his way out and avoids a cross body.

Sheamus is sent to the floor but he catches a charging Christian with a knee lift and hits the ten forearms to the chest. A slingshot shoulder gets two and Sheamus busts out the Cloverleaf but Christian is quickly in the ropes. White Noise is countered into a sunset flip for two but the Brogue Kick misses. Christian goes up top but jumps into the Brogue Kick for the pin at 15:50.

Rating: B-. Another nice long match tonight with Christian getting to do what he does best: look good in a losing effort. Sheamus is still in a weird place as the fans like him and always pop for the Brogue (hard not to) but he really needs something to do. Good match here and that’s all you can ask for at times.

Earlier tonight the Authority called today the biggest night since the first Wrestlemania when Bryan cams up screaming, saying that he’ll fight HHH right now or at Wrestlemania but HHH laughed it off.

Black History Month video on the Soul Patrol of Tony Atlas and Rocky Johnson.

Dean Ambrose is tired of explaining himself to Rollins and Reigns. They don’t trust him so he’s out of here. Rollins and Reigns are left alone when the Wyatts come in. Reigns challenges them to a fight right now, but says he’d love to fight Bray one on one tonight, with the Family and the dogs staying in the back. Bray accepts and laughs.

Ric Flair and Booker T were on the Raw pre-show panel to talk about the show. Flair starts a YES chant to take us to the next match.

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Kane slugs away to start but Bryan comes back with kicks to the leg. A running dropkick to the knee has Kane in trouble and some chop blocks put him down. Kane fights out of a half crab and stomps away but Bryan fights back like the plucky hero he is. A shot to the shoulder puts him back down though and we hit the armbar, only to have Bryan send Kane to the floor. The FLYING GOAT is blocked by an uppercut and we take a break.

Back with Kane stomping away and putting on an armbar, only to have Bryan quickly punch his way out. Bryan hits the moonsault out of the corner and takes Kane down with the running clothesline. There are the YES Kicks but the big one is countered and a side slam gets two. Bryan fights back again and gets two of his own off a top rope hurricanrana before hitting the running corner dropkicks.

Kane charges over the top to the floor and there’s the FLYING GOAT! Another running dropkick knocks Kane against the barricade and a missile dropkick connects back inside. A big kick to the head gets two but Kane counters the top rope headbutt with a chokeslam for a close two. Bryan can’t get the YES Lock the first or second time so he hits a quick running knee for the pin at 15:40.

Rating: C+. This was the match that the two needed to have and it gets rid of the idea of Bryan vs. Kane at Wrestlemania. It’s pretty clear that we’re heading towards HHH vs. Bryan in the showdown and there’s nothing wrong with that at all. Not a great match or anything but it was a good performance by both guys. Kane needs to lose the shirt though.

Bryan calls HHH a coward for running from a challenge and hiding behind Stephaine’s skirt. Ever since HHH put on the suit, he’s ignored the people’s wishes, even when they make their voices heard. The YES chant starts up and Bryan asks HHH if he’s listening. There’s an entire arena of people here in Green Bay, Wisconsin chanting YES so give them what they want: HHH vs. Daniel Bryan at Wrestlemania XXX.

Emma vs. Summer Rae

Emma gets her full entrance with the bubbles and dancing but the people still don’t care. Emma grabs a small package for an early two but Summer kicks her head off to take over. Summer puts on a chinlock as the match slows quite a bit. The fans actually cheer for Emma to fight up and she counters another spinwheel kick into the Emma Lock (bridging Indian deathlock) for the win at 3:24.

Rating: D+. Emma still isn’t working due to the Santino factor but that’s WWE for you. Just let her be goofy and adorable and the fans will get into her. The lack of the long pants and shirt helped her here but she still needs to be herself instead of Santino’s latest chick. Seriously he’s had like four Divas now.

We look back at Hogan’s return earlier.

Usos vs. New Age Outlaws

Non-title. Dogg gets on the mic and says we know how this ends so the young kids need to get out of the ring. The Usos actually do it so the Outlaws can do their schtick but the twins come in and clean house with Jimmy superkicking and splashing Road Dogg for the pin at 1:13.

Bray Wyatt vs. Roman Reigns

They trade right hands to start and Bray rolls to the floor. Back in and Reigns shoves Bray around before a finger to the eye sends Wyatt outside again. Bray comes back in again and takes over with a boot to the head followed by a hard clothesline for two. Roman will have none of this selling stuff and takes Bray outside for an even harder clothesline as we take a break.

Back with Bray hitting a running backsplash and drawing what sounds like a SCARY chant. We hit the headlock on the mat as the fans are already bored because this hasn’t been going a thousand miles an hour. Bray hits his running cross body and a splash in the corner but Reigns avoids another charge. The dropkick from the floor to the apron sets up a belly to back slam (similar to Cena’s ProtoBomb) for two….and here are the other Wyatts.

They’re just on the floor but Rollins sprints in from the crowd and DIVES on both of them, giving Bray a rollup for two. Reigns misses a charge into the post as Rollins is beaten down. Ambrose finally charges in from the back to join the fight but Reigns scores with the Superman Punch. He has to go after Harper though and Ambrose comes in for the DQ at 14:00 though.

Rating: C+. This was the only way to go here and the ending was about as good as it could have been. They clearly couldn’t job either guy and it advances Dean’s split. It helped that Ambrose was caught up in the moment rather than doing something stupid so Reigns has a reason to believe him when he says it wasn’t intentional.

Here are Heyman and Lesnar to close the show with a table in the ring. Paul calls Brock the undisputed #1 contender but apparently HHH won’t let him in the title match. He’s offered Brock an open contract at Wrestlemania but that’s just not good enough. What Brock wants is to conquer history, just like he’s done with every single thing he’s done in his life. The only reason Brock Lesnar can’t conquer the WWE Championship is the Authority won’t give him the chance.

That’s how they get you in WWE, so Paul has advised Brock to turn down the open contract and demand the title match. If not, there’s no Lesnar at Wrestlemania…..and there’s the gong. Brock isn’t sure what to think because apparently the lightning, thunder, smoke, organ music and UNDERTAKER BEING ON THE SCREEN AREN’T CLEAR ENOUGH. Undertaker comes through the curtain (with black Ministry beard of course) and Brock still isn’t sure what to do.

Taker turns to Brock and stares him down as a LOUD Undertaker chant starts up. He looks over Brock at the sign and we get the big staredown. Paul gets the idea and open the contract for Brock. Lesnar immediately signs and hands Taker the pen. Heyman offers Taker the match so Taker STABS BROCK’s HAND WITH THE PEN and chokeslams him through the table. The hood comes off and he’s got a little mohawk going to make him look even more evil. Brock is left laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. I had a blast with tonight’s show as it feels like we’re getting to Wrestlemania season. We’ve got three major matches practically penciled in and a lot of stuff got nice build as well. Couple that with four matches going 14+ minutes and you can’t go wrong here. The ending was the high point of course but I can’t shake that feeling I got from Hogan. It just felt right seeing him back on Raw and I can’t help but smile.

Results

Alberto Del Rio b. Baitsta – Rollup

Big E. b. Cesaro via DQ when Jack Swagger interfered

Sheamus b. Christian – Brogue Kick

Daniel Bryan b. Kane – Running Knee

Emma b. Summer Rae – Emma Lock

Bray Wyatt b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Dean Ambrose interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Summerslam at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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So I’ve had a night to sleep on one of the most controversial shows I’ve ever seen. I didn’t have the chance to go as in depth as I wanted to with some of my thoughts last night because the Rumble is such a fast paced match. Let’s take a closer look the whole show in more of a rapid fire format.

First of all, the New Age Outlaws are the new Tag Team Champions. The more I think about this, the less I care for the idea. Yeah the Outlaws are on a nice reunion tour, but so were the Rhodes Brothers. Cody has the potential to become something important in the future, while the Outlaws are here for nostalgia and not much more. I get the idea of the Authority being corrupt and giving their friends title shots, but it doesn’t come off as cronyism when they won the title match clean.

Moving on to the actual show, the opening match was outstanding. That’s the kind of a win that Bray Wyatt needed because he’s the kind of character that is going to take a big hit when he loses his first big match. The win was good but the fact that it was one of the best openers in company history helped a lot.

Brock Lesnar is a terrifying human being. Seriously, the guy is just a beast and that F5 to Big Show had me screaming at my screen.

That brings us to what I thought was the bigger insult to the wrestlers of the night. John Cena vs. Randy Orton was a good match last night, but the fans treated it horribly. I understand that they wanted Daniel Bryan to be in the title picture, but it was incredibly rude to go off on those two because he wasn’t in there.

The worst part of it all: it was a good match. It’s true that Orton vs. Cena has been done several times and no one wanted to see this rematch, but the fans were chanting BORING less than 20 seconds in. If the mtch is actually boring then chant that, but don’t go off on it from the beginning. The stealing finishers stuff was good and thankfully it calmed the crowd down a bit, even though Orton went nuts several times out there.

One last thing about the match: John Cena continues to be an absolute master at working a crowd. Look back to the show in Portland (somewhere in the northwest at least) right before TLC when the fans chanted for Bryan throughout the Championship Celebration. Cena was smart enough to bring Bryan into his promo. Last night the fans were chanting for Y2J and Cena tried a Liontamer. The crowd immediately calmed down because they knew that someone was listenting to them and that’s all they wanted. It was still a very good match though.

That brings us to the ending of the match and its post match antics. It would seem that Cena’s Wrestlemania program is with the Wyatts and that’s good news all around. If there’s a better way to give Wyatt a big rub, I certainly can’t think of it. This is what the fans have been asking for: getting new stars to the top of the roster. Bray got the biggest win of his career last night and will now have the biggest match of his life ten weeks. It helps that Bray has shown he can have great matches and is more than just a great worker.

Now hopefully it’s just a singles match instead of turning it into a rumored tag match with Cena and Bryan teaming up against the Wyatts. Daniel is at the point where he doesn’t need a rub like that and we don’t want the Cena vs. Wyatt match stolen by fans who want to see something completely different from Bryan.

So that brings us to the big one of the evening and we’ll start from the beginning.

CM Punk was the Rumble’s Iron Man and I don’t think most people noticed. Punk spent a long stretch of the match laying around and waiting to get to the final four before Kane eliminated him in a very quick scene that didn’t have the impact they were hoping for. Kane vs. Punk at Elimination Chamber should be good but it felt like they were rushing to get to that moment last night and it took away from Punk’s Rumble performance. Good, but not memorable night for Punk last night.

The same can be said for Rollins and Ambrose. Both guys were in the Rumble for a long time but neither did anything all that special. The most interesting thing was Dean trying to throw out Reigns, but you could easily write that off by just saying it was trying to win the Rumble. I’d be fine if that’s what they did, but it feels like another seed being planted for the big Reigns face turn.

Alexander Rusev had a good debut and looked like a monster. I wish he had gotten to throw some people out, but having five or so people combine to eliminate him was a nice touch. He’s the kind of guy that would have been headlining house shows against Hogan back in 1986 and his NXT matches have all been good. He’ll be a force if given some time and it looks like his first program is with Kofi, who he’s traded wins with in NXT.

As for Kofi, his running jump back to the apron last night was a nice change of pace from the last few years worth of saves. More often than not they’ve been creative or clever, but this one was all about Kofi showing off how athletic he is. It was awesome looking and that’s all it was supposed to be.

Dolph Ziggler returned. It’s over.

Kevin Nash was a surprise so let’s look at all of the legends/comedy characters at once. It was a lighter year for these guys this time with only a handful of appearances. Nash was Nash, El Torito was there as a comedy segment (for the love of all things good and holy, don’t let this start Horny vs. Chavo II with Torito and Fandango), and then there’s JBL. While it was a fine idea, Cole saying “this is the first time the JBL character has appeared in the Rumble” made me groan. I know kayfabe is dead, but don’t pummel its corpse. Also the lack of Jake Roberts surprised me.

I’ll save Reigns and Batista for later.

Sheamus also returned last night and you can see the same problems that plagued him during his last year: he’s in severe need for a story. At the moment, Sheamus is just a strong guy who kicks people in the head. He hasn’t had the slightest bit of adversity or problems since he was World Heavyweight Champion. That makes for a very uninteresting character and not something that is going to carry Sheamus much further. Give us a reason to care about Sheamus the person, not Sheamus the fighter.

On a more positive note: that’s three straight final threes in the Rumble for Sheamus. Him being successful in the Rumble fits his fighter character really well, just like it did with Austin. Little things like that are when you can tell the writers are actually paying attention and it’s very nice to see.

Miz had a nice showing last night as well. If you let him show some aggression and stop with the stupid Figure Four stuff (that’s been going on for over a year now), there’s still hope for that guy.

Del Rio was just there and thankfully it doesn’t look like he’ll be doing anything of note for awhile.

I watched last year’s Rumble for the redos and it’s astounding how far Ryback has fallen in just a year. He came in at #30 in 2013 and destroyed the world before being in a showdown with Cena. Now he’s a midcard comedy act and little more. There’s still hope for him, but it’s not as a heel.

Big E. Langston was the worst disappointment to me last night. He came in, eliminated no one, and basically did nothing in his entire time in the Rumble. I’m still very high on the guy but he needs to have a good night soon to make up for that. Obviously it’s not all on him, but the Usos had better performances in the Rumble than Langston did.

I feel very sorry for Rey Mysterio. He could have been Santa Claus with a bag full of Corvettes for the crowd and would have been the biggest disappointment of the entire night. Anybody in that spot not named Bryan was going to be booed last night and it’s not Mysterio’s fault at all.

That brings us to the important stuff of the match last night. First off, Roman Reigns is getting the push that people have been expecting him to get for a long time (time for a little bragging: I’ve said he would be the biggest star out of the three since the beginning) and breaking Kane’s record was a big step towards that. Keep in mind that Reigns came in at #15 and Kane came in at #6 when he set the old record and the twelve eliminations last night are even more impressive. More on Reigns later.

Now it’s time to get to the most controversial guy in the Rumble: Big Dave Batista. I think I’m one of the few who sees it this way, but Batista was find as the Rumble winner. Yeah he’s been back for six days, but he was a big deal when he left and it’s not like he pinned someone to win the thing. Batista came back at the wrong time due to the whole Bryan fiasco. If this was any other year, people wouldn’t mind nearly as much. No he’s not in the same shape as he was in before, but give him more than ten minutes in the Rumble to get back to form. Also for people criticizing his spear, he was never good at that move. Why should he be now?

And now, for the Daniel Bryan situation. I don’t think people were saying he had to win or else. It wasn’t that Bryan didn’t win the Rumble, but that he wasn’t even in it. If Bryan was in the Rumble, got down to say the final three or even four before being screwed out of the match, it would have been a FAR better reaction. As a very smart guy named Barbosa said on WrestleZone last night:

“Pardon me and the thousands of others for having some expectation of the hottest act being put in a position to win the Royal Rumble.”

That sums it up as well as anything else could. Bryan didn’t need to win, but he needed to place or show. The crowd knew what they wanted last night and did not care what else they were going to get as a consolation. As I said in the review, I’ve never seen a crowd just turn on a match as fast as they did when Mysterio’s music hit. They did not care to see anyone but Bryan and they made that very clear in a few seconds.

This brings me to the reception the show received. I’ve seen people calling it the worst show the company ever produced and that just makes me laugh. First and foremost, Wyatt vs. Bryan was more than enough to make it an acceptable show. Also listen to the crowd for the entire Rumble up to Mysterio’s music hitting. They’re totally into the match and care about everything going on, but that one moment changes everything. It’s a great show with a bad last fifteen minutes, not a horrible show at all.

Oh and one more thing which unfortunately I can’t take credit for. Picture this:

#30 hits and Daniel Bryan’s music plays.

“I’m afraid I’ve got some BAD NEWS for you all. Daniel Bryan isn’t in the Royal Rumble but BAD NEWS BARRETT IS!”

He would be a made man for years.

So now let’s look at what we should have on tap for Mania.

Punk vs. HHH. Obvious before the Rumble and even more confirmed now.

It would seem that we’re getting Orton vs. Batista, but for the life of me I can’t picture that being the main event or even for the title. I’m not sure what replaces it yet, but if that’s for the title then they’ll be lucky if the fans don’t set the ring on fire.

Cena vs. Bray Wyatt. Should be awesome, though there’s a chance it’ll be Cena/Bryan vs. the Wyatt Family, which doesn’t blow my skirt up.

That leaves us with four men who now need Wrestlemania matches and I think we get the following matches out of it:

Daniel Bryan vs. Brock Lesnar and the Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns.

Can you imagine the David vs. Goliath story with Bryan fighting back against Lesnar’s power? Punk made a great match out of it and Bryan can do the same. That would placate the audience well enough in New Orleans I believe.

Roman Reigns is as perfect of a Wrestlemania opponent as you could have for Undertaker. He’s been built up as a record breaker with the Survivor Series (he tied it there but it’s the same idea) and then last night with Kane’s Rumble record, so why not go after the biggest record of them all? Picture Reigns hitting the spear and Undertaker kicking out at the last second or Reigns Superman Punching his way out of the chokeslam. It would be an epic showdown.

Overall it was a very good show but the booking was questionable at best and horrendous at worst. The good thing coming out of it is the number ten, as in how many weeks we have until Wrestlemania. There’s a lot of time to fix the problems shown last night and I have confidence that they’ll fix things instead of letting Wrestlemania be hijacked by the fans. Bryan doesn’t have to be in the title match, but if they put him out there with Cena or against Sheamus, there’s going to be a very big problem that they brought entirely on themselves.

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Royal Rumble 2014
Date: January 26, 2014
Location: Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Tonight marks the official start of the Road to Wrestlemania. We’re ten weeks away from the biggest show of the year and barring some surprising changes, the main event will be set in place tonight. The odds on favorite for the Rumble would seem to be Batista, but for the life of me I can’t imagine anyone but Daniel Bryan winning it. He isn’t entered yet, but there are about ten slots left open. Give him a late number and listen to the roof blow off the place. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Cody Rhodes/Goldust

Cody and Goldust are defending and lost a non-title match to the Outlaws to set this up. Road Dogg starts with Cody and is taken down by a quick shoulder block. Back up and Roadie hits his shaky fist but has to duck the Disaster Kick. Gunn comes in off the tag but is quickly sent to the floor for a top rope clothesline as we take a break. Back with Road Dogg dropping a knee on Goldust for two and putting on a chinlock.

Goldust fights back up and a double clothesline puts both guys down. Billy breaks up a tag attempt as the announcers brag about how Gunn hasn’t aged a bit since the 90s. For 50 years old the guys is in good shape. Goldust finally makes the hot tag and Cody speeds things up, including a double springboard missile dropkick to put both Outlaws down. Cross Rhodes lays out Road Dogg but Billy saves at two. Billy comes in off a blind tag as Cody hits the Disaster Kick to Roadie, setting up the Fameasser for the pin and the titles at 6:30.

Rating: C. I was surprised here. Not only was this not the result I was expecting, but the match was better than I thought it was going to be. The Brothers had been on one heck of a roll since the fall, but this likely leads into the Authority being corrupt storyline. That doesn’t make sense given that the Outlaws just won the match clean, but I’m assuming that’s the idea.

The opening video focuses on a countdown and how the Road to Wrestlemania begins tonight.

We recap Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt. Daniel joined the Wyatt Family a few weeks ago but only lasted two weeks in the group before turning on Bray in the huge face turn, despite him barely ever being a heel. Tonight is the showdown we’ve been waiting for.

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

The Family is with Bray here, despite the idea of the match being that they’re not supposed to be here. Daniel fires off kicks to the leg and takes Bray down with a running knee but Bray gets in a shot of his own to take over. The Wyatts get in a few blows of their own and are ejected, with Bray saying he doesn’t need them to fight this war. Back in and Daniel gets in some kicks to the leg and a high cross body for two, only to be sent to the floor. Bray misses a charge into the steps and injures his knee again, giving Bryan the opening he’s been needing.

Daniel hooks something resembling an Indian Deathlock before stomping Bray’s face into the mat for two. They slug it out on the apron with the fans chanting YES/NO in time. Bray headbutts Daniel to stagger him and wrings his arm down onto the apron to take over. Back in and Bray is in serious mode now. We hit the chinlock but Daniel quickly fights up with forearms, only to be backdropped to the floor.

The annoying fans chant Jerry Lawler as Bray rams Daniel’s head into the post and drives in forearms for good measure. A running senton backsplash has Daniel in even more trouble and Bray asks the fans why they don’t help him. Bray catapults Daniel throat first into the ropes and we hit another chinlock. Wyatt does his spider walk out of the corner and the announcers of course laugh at Linda Blair jokes. He stays on Daniel’s neck with another chinlock but Daniel gets in a shot to the head and shakes the ropes before firing off even more strikes.

A drop toehold sends Bray into the middle buckle and there are the YES Kicks to the chest and leg. Daniel hooks a hurricanrana from the middle rope to send the big man flying but he’s out at two. Now the fans are into it by saying this is awesome and there’s the moonsault in the corner. Daniel loads up the clothesline but thankfully Bray knows what’s coming and hits a running elbow to stop Bryan’s comeback.

Bray misses a charge and falls to the floor, allowing Bryan to hit a running tornado DDT off the apron. Awesome looking move. There’s the running dropkick to knock Bray into the barricade and the missile dropkick puts him down back inside. Now the real YES Kicks have Bray in even more trouble as the fans are going nuts. The big kick to the head gets two and Daniel loads up the running dropkicks in the corner but Bray clotheslines him inside out for a very near fall.

Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two and there’s the YES Lock but Bray bites the hand for the break. Bray’s superplex is countered with headbutts and Daniel hits a top rope splash to crush Wyatt. Daniel loads up the running knee but Bray bails to the floor. Bryan dives at him with the FLYING GOAT but Bray catches him in midair and hits a wicked Sister Abigail into the barricade. Sister Abigail connects for the pin at 21:37.

Rating: A. Well that was awesome. This was a good example of a match where both guys could look great and only one could win. Daniel losing here isn’t a bad thing as he could still come back later and win the Rumble to make up for this. Both guys look better coming out of this and Bray was the one that needed the win more. As soon as he loses, a lot of his mystique is gone. Outstanding match here and something Bray needed.

The expert panel (HBK, Flair, Duggan) are impressed. Shawn seems fine after his fight with Bryan a few weeks ago.

Paul Heyman says Brock wants a title shot and talks about how great Big Show is. It doesn’t matter though as Brock is going to destroy him and then take over the WWE.

We recap Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar. Show doesn’t like Lesnar and is tired of him being a bully so tonight he’s standing up to him. He also stuffed a Lesnar takedown attempt on Raw earlier this week to show how strong he was.

Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show

For once this is under regular rules. Brock takes him down before the bell like an MMA fight and just mauls Big Show before blasting him over and over with a chair. More chair shots put Show on the mat as Jerry butchers history, saying Big Show gave Brock his first loss at the 2002 Royal Rumble (it was the 2002 Survivor Series). Show is beaten down even more with chair shot after chair shot. The bell still hasn’t rung.

The referee runs from Brock and Big Show says ring the bell. Brock comes at him with the chair but walks into the KO Punch which knocks Lesnar silly. He rolls to the floor and Big Show throws him around with ease. Back in and Brock ducks another KO Punch and gets caught in the F5. Lesnar WALKS AROUND WITH BIG SHOW ON HIS SHOULDERS and hits the biggest F5 you’ll ever see, making it more like an AA, for the pin at 2:05.

Post match Brock destroys him with even more chair shots, each one louder than the last. He bends two chairs over Show’s back so he goes to get a third and beats on Show’s leg. Show is left in a heap after what was much more of a segment than a match.

The Shield won’t tell each other their numbers. Rollins says the only number that matters is three.

Randy Orton says he’ll beat John Cena tonight and send him to the back of the line. Renee Young mentions Batista, Brock Lesnar and Bray Wyatt wanting title shots. Orton: “Bray Wyatt? He’s a Duck Dynasty reject.” The crowd laughs as Orton says it’s not John Cena’s night.

We get a LONG recap of John Cena vs. Randy Orton. Randy beat him at TLC for the Undisputed Title in a TLC match but tonight it’s one fall with no stipulations. On top of that Orton attacked Cena’s father a few weeks ago on Raw to make it personal.

WWE Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

We’re ready to go after the big match intros. The fans chant for Daniel Bryan and then that the match is boring. Cena takes him down with a headscissors and the chant shifts to the usual dueling Cena chants. Orton grabs a headlock and suplexes Cena down as the chants go to WE WANT ANGLE and Randy Savage. There’s a Y2J chant…..AND CENA TRIES FOR A LIONTAMER! It shifts the chants to Undertaker as Orton suplexes Cena back inside for two.

The fans think it’s boring as we’re in a chinlock less than five minutes into the match. They head outside with Cena being sent into the steps as the crowd is restless again. Back to the Bryan chant and Orton actually shouts that he’s the champion and not Bryan. A nice DDT puts Cena down for two and the fans think both guys suck. Cena comes back with an electric chair for two and the shoulder blocks followed by the ProtoBomb. Orton counters the Shuffle with the powerslam but Cena comes back with his half nelson slam into a neckbreaker for two of his own.

Cena loads up the top rope Fameasser but first has to block a superplex attempt before connecting for two. Orton throws him to the apron but Cena backdrops him to the floor to counter the Elevated DDT. The crowd has calmed down a bit now. Orton comes right back with the Elevated DDT on the floor and holds a finger to his ear for the crowd. Back inside and the RKO is countered into the STF as the crowd just does not care, probably because they know a title match isn’t ending less than fifteen minutes in.

Randy crawls over to the rope and gets in a shot to the head for a breather on the floor. Back in and Cena grabs another ProtoBomb followed by the Shuffle but Orton grabs the rope to block the AA. The referee gets bumped and there’s the STF, making Randy tap but there’s no referee. Randy hits him in the face with the belt for two as the doctor revives the referee.

The fans think this is awful as an AA gets two for John. An RKO gets the same and the fans still don’t buy that the match is ending yet. Orton poses as the fans say they want Divas. With nothing else to do, Orton puts Cena in the STF but Cena is quickly out and has Orton in a Crossface. That’s countered into a rollup for two and Orton hits an AA (done more like Cena used to do it without going down) for two more.

Cena of course hits an RKO for two of his own before loading up the middle rope AA, only to have Orton get free pretty quickly. A tornado DDT puts Orton down and sets up the STF in the middle of the ring….and cue the Wyatts. Cena chases them off but walks into the RKO for the pin at 20:53. Orton was surprised by the Wyatts being there.

Rating: B. The worst part about the crowd: the match was good. Trading finishers was something new for these guys, which is impressive as they’ve had about a dozen matches on PPV alone. The Wyatts interfering would seem to set up Cena vs. Wyatt at Mania, which is interesting to say the least. Good stuff here, as the show continues to rock.

Cena is destroyed as Orton bails. Bray hits Sister Abigail after shouting BEHOLD THE CREATORS OF THE NEW WORLD.

The New Age Outlaws tell Renee Young to put some more onto their intro. We look at the end of the preshow match and it’s a new record for longest time between title reigns at 14 years. They have two words for Renee: new champs.

We even get old school Rumble promos!

Miz will do whatever it takes to headline Wrestlemania again.

The Usos say only one can win and go to Wrestlemania.

Langston is ready.

Fandango wants to go to the Big Dance.

Batista: “Exactly.”

Sandow says insanity means trying the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. He won’t make them again.

Ryback says his unlimited energy takes him to Wrestlemania.

Rey Mysterio says he’ll shock the world again.

Back to the expert panel. Shawn picks Shield or Punk. Flair picks Batista. Duggan picks…..Dolph Ziggler?

Royal Rumble

90 second entrants this year and it’s Punk at #1 and Rollins at #2. Punk takes him back into the corner to start but Rollins puts him onto the top, only to be elbowed in the head. Punk comes back with strikes but Rollins just punches him into the face. A kick to Seth’s ribs slows him down but he avoids a big kick to the face and hits a running dropkick. There’s a running forearm in the corner but Punk comes back with the running knee. He calls for the GTS but gets caught by an enziguri. Punk kicks him in the face and both guys are down as Damien Sandow is in at #3.

Sandow goes right for Punk as Rollins gets a breather. Punk gets double teamed but comes back with a neckbreaker to Rollins/DDT to Sandow combo to put both guys down. He tries to throw Rollins out but Sandow breaks it up. Cody Rhodes is in at #4, meaning people from earlier in the night can be in as well. He hits a quick Cross Rhodes on Damien but Seth prevents an elimination. Sandow charges at Punk and is backdropped out to get us back to three.

Rollins gets double teamed but Kane is #5, wrestling in black dress pants. He goes right after Punk and stomps him down in the corner before hitting a nice side slam. Punk blocks the chokeslam with a high kick and throws Kane out with relative ease. Alexander Rusev, a Bulgarian monster from NXT, is in at #6. He immediately starts cleaning house but only throws Cody and Rollins to the apron. Alexander picks up Punk and throws him around with a fallaway slam and it’s Jack Swagger at #7.

Jack charges to the ring and hits a quick Vader Bomb on Rollins and Cody as the ring is filling up a bit. We get a showdown between Rusev and Swagger and the fans chant USA. Rusev takes over with a clothesline and a charge in the corner but Rollins takes Alexander’s leg out and it’s a triple team with everyone not named Punk stomping the Bulgarian. The fans are WAY into this.

Kofi Kingston is in at #8 and you can feel the big save coming. He rolls into the ring and immediately punches Punk down but can’t throw him out. Cody hits the Disaster Kick on Swagger as Kofi goes after Rusev, who he’s been feuding with in NXT. Swagger has Rollins upside down in the corner but can’t get him out. Jimmy Uso is in at #9 and hits a quick Bubba Bomb on Rollins and gets in shots on everyone else. Punk headbutts Jimmy and we get some good old fashioned racial sterotypes as it has no effect.

Goldust is in at #10, giving us a group of Punk, Rollins, Rhodes, Kingston, Rusev, Swagger and Uso. He takes Rollins down with some right hands and hits the kneeling uppercut on Jimmy. Rusev punches the paint off Goldie’s face to stop his momentum and eveyrone gangs up on Alexander again. We need some eliminations here. A big group of about five people get Rusev out in a showing that could have gone longer.

Kofi is knocked to the apron and into Rusev’s arms, so he lays him on the barricade and drives knees into Kingston’s back. Kofi stands up on the barricade and tightropes across before jumping ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE APRON in an incredible athletic display. Ambrose (coming through the entrance) is in at #11. He goes right for Kofi and then Punk as Swagger is in big trouble but gets back inside. Things slow down a bit as Goldust slides back in under the ropes. Dolph Ziggler returns at #12.

Ziggler speeds things up by pounding on everyone but is put on the apron in just a few seconds. The ring is really getting full as we need a monster to clear it out. Instead we get R-Truth at #13 but is double teamed by the two Shield members. They toss him to the apron and Ambrose kicks him out with ease. Jimmy goes up but gets kicked in the head, allowing Ambrose to shove him out as well. Kofi is on the apron but has to block a boot from Swagger. He holds onto it so long that he’s literally hanging in by his feet and pulls Jack’s boot off.

Kevin Nash of all people is in at #14, giving us a group of Punk, Rollins, Nash, Ziggler, Ambrose, Goldust, Swagger, Rhodes and Kingston. Nash puts out Swagger as soon as he gets in but has to deal with Shield. Things slow down again and it’s Roman Reigns in at #15 to put the entire Shield in the match. There’s a spear to Cody and a headbutt to Nash’s chest. Roman catches Trouble in Paradise and throws Kofi out but shrugs off the Zig Zag and hits a GREAT spear on Ziggler for a quick elimination.

Nash is low bridged out by Reigns as well as the ring is rapidly emptying out. Goldust and Cody go after Reigns but Rollins makes a save. Great Khali is in at #16 and Shield is on him as he comes in. The giant shoves all of them down but a Superman Punch knocks him into the ropes, allowing all three of them to put Khali out. Goldust, Punk and Rhodes pair off with the three guys but Cody is sent to the floor, only to be accidentally knocked out by his brother. Reigns dumps Goldust and we’re down to Punk vs. Shield.

Things even up a lot as Sheamus returns at #17. Shield is right on him but the pale one fights them off and gets them all in different corners. There are the ten forearms to Ambrose’s chest with the last one being to the exposed chest. An Irish Curse puts Rollins down and a Brogue Kick knocks Reigns silly. Sheamus stands tall but Reigns is dead weight. Rollins and Ambrose double team Sheamus and it’s Miz at #18, giving us Shield, Punk, Sheamus and Miz.

Everyone pairs off again but they all wind up in one corner. Punk has been down for a long time now but is likely just getting a breather. The clock is going very fast tonight as Fandango is in at #19. Shield swarms Sheamus as Fandango goes after Miz. Punk is still down in the corner. The fans want Daniel Bryan but get El Torito at #20. As in the little guy in the white bull costume.

Naturally he beats up a few guys but Punk gives him a look that channels Miz by saying “really?” Punk grabs him by the head but gets caught in a freaking hurricanrana. Fandango runs him over (JBL: “PETA is going to be mad. I head Mantaur is his grandfather.”) but gets hurricanranaed to the apron and dropkicked out by the bull. Torito dives on Reigns like an idiot though and is LAUNCHED onto Fandango for his sixth elimination. We’re back to Miz, Sheamus and Punk vs. Shield.

Cesaro is in at #21 and picks Miz up for a quick Cesaro Swing. Punk gets one as well but Rollins and Ambrose break it up. Cesaro rams them into each other and swings Rollins until it’s Luke Harper at #22. Reigns spears Cesaro down as things slow again. Rollins and Cesaro slug it out and Jey Uso is in at #23, giving us Shield, Sheamus, Miz, Jey, Punk, Cesaro and Harper. Speaking of Cesaro and Harper, they have a big power slugout with Harper kicking Cesaro’s head off to take over.

JBL of all people is in at #24 to a BIG pop and comes in wearing a full suit and tie. He yells at Cole to come take his coat, allowing Reigns to throw him out with ease. That’s #7 for Reigns. Erick Rowan is in at #25 and teams up with Harper to dump Miz, leaving us Shield, the Wyatt Family, Miz, Punk, Sheamus, Cesaro and Jey Uso. Jey is kicked out by Harper and Shield stares down the Wyatts as Ryback is in at #26. Everyone brawls and Alberto Del Rio is #27.

Nothing much happens until Batista is in for the big cleanup spot at #28. He’s in very short shorts instead of trunks but still looks good. He clotheslines Rowan out and it’s showdown time with Ryback. They slug it out and Cesaro has to dive out of the way of a launched Batista. Ryback is backdropped out by Big Dave but Del Rio clips Batista and kicks him in the head. Batista easily picks Alberto up and tosses him out though, right before Big E. Langston is in at #29.

Langston starts with a nice belly to belly on Batista and a series of backbreakers to Sheamus. The fans start chanting YES as the clock is ticking down. #30 is…….Rey Mysterio, completely letting the air out of the arena. The final group is Punk, Shield, Harper, Sheamus, Cesaro, Mysteiro, Langston and Batista. Rey and Rollins try to eliminate each other but neither go out. Sheamus knocks out Langston to get us down to ten but the fans just do not care now.

Rollins tosses Mysterio to a pop because he’s not who the fans wanted to see. Rollins and Ambrose stomp Sheamus down in the corner and get Harper to the apron but Reigns Superman Punches him out. Ambrose tries to get rid of Reigns but can’t quite do it, triggering an argument. Cesaro goes after both of them so Reigns dumps Cesaro, Rollins and Ambrose, which ties Kane’s record of eleven. His reward is a spinebuster as we’re down to four: Punk, Batista, Sheamus and Reigns.

Make that three as Kane comes in and pulls Punk out before chokeslamming him through the table. The final three are Reigns, Batista and Sheamus who are all down as the fans chant for Mysterio. Everyone slowly gets back up and the fans boo this out of the building. This would be Sheamus’ third straight final three by the way. Batista breaks up a spear to Sheamus as the NO chants begin. Sheamus rewards him with the Regal Roll but Batista ducks the Brogue Kick.

A backdrop puts Sheamus on the apron and Reigns dumps him for the record at 12 eliminations. Batista thinks he dumps Reigns but Roman slides back in as we’re down to two. Roman unzips the vest and stares Batista down as the fans are somewhat into this. They slug it out with Reigns taking over but Batista comes back with a spear. The fans are COMPLETELY behind Reigns here as he spears Batista right back. He’s all fired up….but Batista easily throws him out for the win at 55:10, letting the air out of the arena again.

Rating: B. It was a really good Rumble, but man alive if that crowd reaction doesn’t change something, nothing is going to. I’ve been watching wrestling my entire life and I have never ever heard a crowd just go silent like they did when Mysterio came out. I mean they just DIED. Batista was destined to win this thing, even though he was the completely wrong pick. Reigns looks like a STAR here but needed the win to cement it. Batista just was not the right pick here, but you knew it was coming the entire time.

The fans are not pleased as a lot of fireworks go off to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. Very ticked off crowd to say the least, this was an outstanding show. Everything was either good to excellent with only the world title match being a step below the rest. Raw tomorrow night is going to be VERY interesting as they’re either going to change a lot of stuff or have the worst crowd reaction to a Wrestlemania of all time. I had an awesome night with this show, but Batista should not have gotten that win, period.

I’ll have more in depth thoughts and analysis on the Rumble tomorrow after it’s had a better chance to process.

Results

Bray Wyatt b. Daniel Bryan – Sister Abigail

Brock Lesnar b. Big Show – F5

Randy Orton b. John Cena – RKO

Batista won the Royal Rumble, last eliminating Roman Reigns

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Summerslam at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Smackdown
Date: November 22, 2013
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before Survivor Series and we’ve more than doubled the announced matches since Monday. The main story coming out of Raw is the return of Rey Mysterio ahead of schedule from his knee injury. He’ll be the fifth main in one of the Survivor Series elimination matches on Sunday even though the word on the street is he’s not ready yet. It’s hard to say if we’ll see him tonight or not. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence. We haven’t had that in awhile.

Mysterio is in a six man tag tonight with the Usos against Shield. Makes sense to give him a lighter load like that.

Tag Titles: Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. Real Americans

Cesaro and Swagger are challenging. This is due to the Americans winning a match over the champions last month because it takes WWE awhile to get around to such things. Goldust and Swagger get things going with Swagger sending him in the corner but getting caught by a dropkick. Off to Cody for a missile dropkick and the release front suplex for two on the now legal Cesaro. Back to Goldie as the champions start working on the arm.

The champions make some fast tags to stay on Cesaro’s arm before a running knee the chest gets two for Cody. A pair of rollups get the same but Cesaro backdrops him to the apron where a Swagger distraction lets Antonio kick Cody to the floor. We take a break and come back with Cesaro holding a standing chinlock. A clothesline puts Cody down and it’s of to Swagger for a belly to belly suplex for two. The running Vader Bomb sets up Cesaro’s double stomp for two before Cesaro catapults Rhodes into a Swagger suplex/powerslam for two more.

Cesaro hooks another chinlock but Cody backdrops an invading Swagger to the floor. Rhodes is about to make a hot tag but Jack pulls Goldust down to the floor in a smart move. Swiss Death gets two on Cody and the challengers are getting frustrated. Cody tries his sunset flip out of the corner but Cesaro powers him back up onto the ropes in a very unique counter. Rhodes kicks him away and hits the moonsault press to put both guys down. Nice sequence there.

Double tag brings in Goldust and Swagger with the champion taking over via his signature stuff. He rains down punches in the corner and gets two off a powerslam as Cesaro makes the save. Both Americans are on the floor so Goldust backdrops Cody down on top of them. Goldust goes up top but gets slammed down on his face, setting up the Patriot Lock. Swagger drags him away from the ropes but Cody breaks it up with the Disaster Kick. Cesaro comes back in with the Cesaro Swing to Cody for a ridiculous 27 seconds. Goldust clotheslines Antonio to the floor and hits the Final Cut on Jack to retain at 9:44 shown of 13:14.

Rating: B. That might be a bit high but I was digging this match. The ending had me thinking the titles could change when Swagger pulled him away from the ropes and the kick was timed perfectly. Cody and Goldust are on fire right now and having great matches with anyone they work with. Really good opener here.

Ryback is in the ring to issue an open challenge. He says being a bully isn’t a bad thing and he enjoys being one very much. Ryback issues the challenge again and some music hits before he can even finish.

Ryback vs. Great Khali

Khali wins a quick chop off before taking Ryback into the corner for some chops to the back. A clothesline puts Ryback on the floor but he comes back in to stomp Khali down in the corner. Ryback runs into an elbow in the corner followed by some clotheslines and the big chop for two. The Meathook puts Khali down and the Shell Shock is good for the pin at 3:20.

Rating: D+. Not a terrible power match here as Ryback is getting more and more impressive with that Shell Shock every time. That being said, it’s not going to matter if he keeps alternating wins and losses. Also it’s not like beating Khali means much. Heath Slater pinned him nearly clean a few months back which should tell you everything you need to know about him anymore.

Vickie comes up to AJ in the back and blames Brad Maddox for everything on Raw. She reiterates everything AJ should know about Survivor Series and puts AJ in a handicap match against the Funkadactyls. AJ claims an ankle injury but Vickie makes the match anyway. It’s best for business you see. Apparently so is mocking someone who works harder than anyone in the division and collapsed at a show in a match where she’s supposed to be the heel despite being cheered over the soulless Bellas who come off as the most stuck up evil women imaginable every time they’re on their reality show which most wrestling fans don’t watch.

We get a clip from the History of the WWE DVD with Bruno Sammartino talking about the peak of his career, including comments from Ivan Koloff and Ken Patera (looking nothing like he did as a wrestler).

Video of John Cena at Oxford University. This didn’t air on the American version of the show for some reason.

Funkadactyls vs. AJ Lee

The Funky ones don’t have to tag so they dropkick AJ out to the floor. AJ tries to leave but the Funkadactyls knock Tamina down and drag AJ back to the ring. Tamina takes Cameron down and AJ gets a near fall off a neckbreaker to Naomi. The announcers ignore the match because JBL accidentally said “Funkerdactyls”, which apparently is the funniest thing ever. Naomi hits an enziguri and the Rear View gets the pin at 2:25.

Bray Wyatt talks about seeing memories that aren’t his own. The world needs more revolutionaries and more revolutions, but no one can understand that because Punk and Bryan make eyes light up whenever they enter a room. Punk and Bryan are just men who breathe and bleed like anyone does but the people revere them like they’re some kind of saviors. Bray’s father told him as a child that the meek shall inherit the earth, but they are the reapers who walk. Follow the buzzards. Creepy and bizarre as always but it made sense.

Shield vs. Usos/Rey Mysterio

Dean and Jimmy start us off with Uso winning a slugout in the corner and dragging Ambrose over for a tag of to Jey. JBL talks about the great debuts in Atlanta and lists off the NWO as starting here. He’s usually better at history than that. Shield starts their fast tags with Rollins and Ambrose taking their shots until Jimmy tags in Jey so the twins can clear the ring. The stereo dives take Rollins and Ambrose out in the usual cool visual.

Back inside and Jey misses a high cross body to give Rollins two and we take a break. Back with Rollins hitting a knee to the head to knock Jey into the Shield corner. Ambrose hooks an arm trap choke before Reigns comes in with a suplex for two. Rollins whips Jey into the corner and talks some trash, only to miss a charge into the corner. Reigns breaks up a hot tag attempt and lays Jey out with a spinout belly to back suplex for two.

Roman misses a charge into the post and the hot tag brings in Mysterio to clean house. Everything breaks down and Reigns spears both Usos down but Rey hurricanranas him out to the floor. Ambrose comes in with a clothesline as Rollins dives over the top rope to take out the Usos. Rey sends Ambrose into the ropes for the 619 and the top rope splash for the pin at 8:47 shown of 12:17.

Rating: C. Just a welcome home match for Rey who looked decent but not much more than that. Shield still looked good out there and there’s no shame in losing to a Hall of Famer like Mysterio. As usual though, Reigns looks like a star out there with the spears to both Usos and some nice power displays throughout the match. He’s going to be huge.

Here’s Big Show (who has changed his clothes since he was seen standing in the hallway) to say he came back to torture the Authority. The best way he can do that is rearranging the face of the WWE and become the new WWE Champion. He’ll lay it all on the line at Survivor Series but here’s Orton to interrupt before Show can elaborate. Orton promises to hurt Big Show on Sunday and end his career, but Big Show wants him to come say that in the ring.

We get a clip from Raw of the Authority telling Orton that he has to win on his own to gain their confidence. Big Show talks about how Orton has all the talent in the world and should have been a locker room leader years ago. Instead it’s always been about what’s best for Randy Orton. On Sunday, Orton is all alone and Big Show will prove how much of a spoiled brat Orton is. Randy says he can beat him, so Big Show pulls up a video of him chokeslamming Orton through the announce table. The segment was well done, but I still don’t care to see the match at all.

R-Truth turns into Pretty Ricky to shill merchandise. To say this is a bad stereotype is an understatement.

Big E. Langston/Dolph Ziggler vs. Curtis Axel/Damien Sandow

Axel gets his rematch on Sunday. Ziggler dropkicks Sandow down to start but gets taken into the corner so the heels can double team. Axel goes after Langston because he’s not that bright, allowing Dolph to hit a jumping DDT to put Curtis down. The hot tag brings in Langston to clean house but Axel breaks up the Big Ending on Sandow. Ziggler lays out Axel with a Fameasser and the Big Ending finishes Sandow at 2:38.

Post match Langston chases Axel off again.

Video on the Wrestlemania ticket launch party.

Various celebrities are here.

Del Rio is in the back and we get a video recapping his feud with Cena. This includes clips of Cena getting the better of Alberto on Raw, but Del Rio says he wasn’t ready. He’ll be ready on Sunday though and will bring the World Title home.

WWE fans think Natalya has the most devastating submission hold over Punk, Bryan and Del Rio. That sounds very odd.

There was a Prime Time Players vs. 3MB match taped and scheduled to air here but there’s no reference to it at all.

Daniel Bryan vs. Luke Harper

Harper drives him into the corner to start but Bryan scores with a few kicks to send the big man outside. We take a break and come back with Bryan being whipped into the barricade. Harper sends him into the steps as well before slowly taking it back inside. Bray shouts at him to stay on Bryan but Daniel takes him down with some kicks and a dragon screw leg whip. Bryan tries to keep up the momentum but charges into a Michinoku Driver of all things for two.

Daniel moonsaults over him in the corner and hits the running clothesline to put Harper down. The kicks have Harper in trouble but he counters the big kick into a sitout powerbomb for two. The Gator Roll keeps Bryan down and Harper has some scary eyes on display. Bryan scores with a kick to the face to send Harper to the floor for the FLYING GOAT. Bray distracts Bryan, allowing Harper to get in a cheap shot from behind. This brings out Punk, but his distraction lets Daniel roll up Harper for the pin at 7:02 shown of 10:32.

Rating: C+. They’ve got something special with Harper. The guy can hang with anyone in the ring and he’s got a quick finisher that looks awesome. Rubbing elbows with Bryan and Punk is going to do nothing but help him which is the exact idea behind the story. Solid power vs. speed match here and a good sign going forward.

Post match the Wyatts lay out Punk and Bryan to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a tough one to grade as they did a good job building up the PPV but there’s very little on the PPV that sounds interesting. The title scene has nothing at all going for it as Del Rio has no chance to win and Big Show vs. Orton is clearly just a means to get to Big Show vs. HHH. The midcard stuff could be interesting and the show could be pleasant surprise but I’m not going into it with very high hopes.

Results

Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Real Americans – Final Cut to Swagger

Ryback b. Great Khali – Shell Shock

Funkadactyls b. AJ Lee – Rear View

Rey Mysterio/Usos b. Shield – Top rope splash to Ambrose

Big E. Langston/Dolph Ziggler b. Curtis Axel/Damien Sandow – Big Ending to Sandow

Daniel Bryan b. Luke Harper – Small package

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With someone you wouldn’t have guessed.The Wyatts laid out Bryan in the back tonight.  I like the potential of this a lot.

So there’s a new Bray Wyatt video out where he talks about Sister Abigail inspiring him to become what he is today and how he was there for her dying breath.  Check it out and join me after the video.

This video makes you wonder what else has happened to this guy to get him to this point.  Clearly a lot of other stuff has happened in his life and it’s led him here to serve some unnamed purpose.  That’s called a backstory, and the character is interesting enough to make fans want to see more of that story filled in.

Here’s the thing: why don’t you hear more of these?  Today almost all characters start in the WWE.  As in they debut and we know almost nothing about them before they showed up.  Some of them might have been in another sport or “worked through the independent scene” but we very rarely get a background or a look at what happens outside of the WWE.  Look at Fandango for example.  He dances a lot, but did he ever dance anywhere?  If he wants to dance, why is he a wrestler and not a dancer?

One of the few people in recent memory that has had a story is Jinder Mahal.  Yeah odds are you don’t remember this, but he came in and Great Khali started working for him against his will.  It was later revealed that Mahal was Khali’s brother in law and was threatening to shame Khali’s sister with a divorce if Khali didn’t work for Mahal.  That’s not much of a story, but it’s not the same repetitive idea over and over and over again.  It’s refreshing to get something DIFFERENT once in awhile.  At the end of the day, there’s only so much you can do from inside the WWE world.  Bring in some stuff from outside and it’s more interesting.

This show feels like it could be big which is rare for Summerslam anymore.Starting on the pre-show, Shield causes the DQ, triggering Show and Henry to come in to make it a tag match, perhaps for the titles.  Shield leaves with all the gold either way.

As for the main stuff we’ll start with the obvious: Bryan wins the title.  There is zero reason to not put it on him other than to advance the HHH vs. Vince story.  If they go that way, fans are going to be MAD.  Cena is taking time off for his elbow soon so there is no reason for him to walk out with the title.  Bryan wins by countering the AA into a small package for the title.

My biggest worry is that this turns into an Attitude Era style brawl with HHH in there, but if that’s what they have to do for Cena’s injury so be it.  HHH flat out does not need to be there otherwise and this match doesn’t deserve to be a stop on the road to HHH vs. Vince at Wrestlemania.  Unfortunately that’s what it’s likely to be and we’ll have to spend a few months hearing about the screwjob that cost Bryan the title, because that’s what fans want to see.

Now for the big question: will there be a cash in by Orton.  All signs point to yes, but I think they’ll pull the trigger on something brilliant: have Bryan retain the title.  Can you imagine how big a deal Bryan will be if he beats Cena and Orton in the same night?  The Attitude Era version gave Jericho something to talk about for twelve years.  I doubt it happens due to me being terrible at stuff like that, but it’s almost too obvious that Orton cashes in and wins the title.

Brock vs. Punk is the real wildcard on this show.  I could easily see this going either way but I can’t pick which one.  You have Punk needing a big win to get momentum back but you need Brock to win so he doesn’t start looking like some monster who can’t finish the job.  I’ll take Punk but there will definitely be a rematch.

Del Rio retains.  It’s WWE 101: the challenger dominates leading up to the match and beats the champion multiple times, the champion retains at the PPV and WWE doesn’t understand why no one is impressed.

Sandow over Cody, though it doesn’t help him as there’s nothing to Cody after all the damage to his character over the last year.

Bray Wyatt beats Kane.  The question here isn’t who wins, but what creepy thing does Bray do.  I’ve heard ideas ranging from he controls the fire and Kane sees it as a miracle and follows Wyatt to Bray lights himself on fire because it’s fun to Rowan jumps through the flames to save his master.  Either way it’s a good start for Bray, but they should keep his wrestling to a minimum.  If he wrestles all the time he’ll become watered down.  Save him for important stuff and let his monsters do the work for him.

Langston and AJ beat Kaitlyn and Ziggler.  Dolph has cooled WAY off lately as this feud has been all about AJ.

Brie beats Natalya.  Is it Brie or Nikki wrestling?  If you think I actually care about the answer, you get extra homework.

Overall Summerslam looks good but it’s a two match show.  That’s definitely not a bad thing though as those two matches are both huge.  The show should be fun and the Ring of Fire has potential to be a nice boost.  They might add another match to the card to flesh it out a bit, but overall it should be good.  Just don’t expect much outside of the main events.

Thoughts/predictions?

Why this isn’t done anymore is beyond me.Lately the Wyatt Family has been the hottest group in wrestling due to its amazing leader Bray Wyatt.  He’s so into the character right now and it’s absolutely amazing.  However, this isn’t the first time we’ve seen Wyatt in WWE.  A few years back he was Husky Harris, a fat guy who ran pretty fast.  There was clearly potential there, but there was nothing to go on.  The solution for WWE: completely repackage him as something unlike Harris at all.

This is called repackaging and it can be the solution to anyone’s problems.  A ton of people have been repackaged over the years to incredible results.

Hulk Hogan – Generic heel to REAL AMERICAN

Papa Shango – Voodoo priest to pimp

Bret Hart – Cowboy to Excellence of Execution

Steve Austin – Ringmaster to the Texas Rattlesnake

Undertaker – Demon who worshipped Vince McMahon to biker

I could go on and on but you get the point.  The key thing to repackaging is that somewhere out there, there’s a gimmick that works for you if you have the talent.  Look at Kane for example.  He went from generic heel characters like Unabomb and Doomsday to a gangster in WCW named Bruiser Mastino (he fought Sting once on WCW Saturday Night) to an evil dentist to a fake Diesel until they FINALLY found the character that worked for him: the Undertaker’s brother who could manipulate fire.  The key thing though was the man had talent and the key was putting him in the right character to make that talent come out.  He tried everything and finally got it right, giving him a career that has run 16 years and a ton of titles.

Now jump back to WWE today: think of how many people could thrive as a completely new character.  Wade Barrett comes to mind.  He’s just a generic English brawler.  A new gimmick could do wonders for him.  Look at what happened to guys like Brodus Clay.  He went from a monster heel with a good look to the Funkasaurus and was the hottest act on Raw for a long time.  It can be done, but the key is to do the work, which WWE seems to not want to do most of the time.  Instead they would rather have a guy lose and lose and lose and lose then give him two wins and wonder why no one cares about him.