WWE Unreleased 1986-1995 DVD
Hosts: Sean Mooney, Charly Caruso

This isn’t something I do very often but every now and then I see a collection like this that is so far up my alley that I can’t help it. The name of the set sums it up as well as possible: it’s a nearly nine hour collection of dark matches and other unreleased material from 1986-1995, which could include some incredibly interesting stuff. Let’s get to it.

Caruso welcomes us to the set and adds a grand total of nothing. Wait this is just an intro for the set? Do all DVDs think I’m stupid enough to not be able to hit PLAY?

Note that there won’t be commentary on most of these matches as they’re mainly dark matches which were taped just in case of something like this.

Another note: the front of the DVD says 1986-1995 but the back says 1985-1996. Come on people. That’s not a knock on them. I just want to get on with the show.

Disc 1

We open with a shot of the WWE tape vault. I…..hang on I need a minute here. It’s just so darn beautiful. Seriously, I’d pay good money to be allowed to just look through that place, let alone touch/look at anything.

Caruso goes through the room (With a box labeled Boston 87-88. Good grief that makes me all tingly. Just imagine the stuff they have hidden in there. It must be enough to fill….probably a three disc set just on 1986-1995 alone. Well played WWE.) and finds a wild Sean Mooney. Sean introduces our first match by explaining the Machines, saying the identity are still a mystery to this day. Oh yeah I’m going to love the heck out of this.

Machines vs. Bobby Heenan/Big John Studd/King Kong Bundy
Date: September 16, 1986
Location: Baltimore Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 7,000

Dark match at the end of a Superstars taping. So the Machines are this “Japanese” team of masked men, consisting of Big Machine (Blackjack Mulligan), Super Machine (Bill Eadie, better known as Ax from Demolition) and usually a random third partner, in this case Hulk Machine (Sterling Golden). They wrestled almost exclusively against Heenan and company with the third partner being the high point of the whole thing.

It’s a brawl to start and Hulk slams Studd to clear the ring (which would earn him $15,000 thanks to a challenge laid out by Studd and Heenan). Bundy and Super officially get things going and it’s so strange to watch this with no commentary. Studd comes in for a big elbow but gets dropped by three straight clotheslines. Hulk chases Heenan away and it’s off to Big vs. Bundy.

That goes badly for Bundy and it gets even worse when Hulk comes in for the showdown. I mean, it’s not like there’s any history here as Hulk Machine is a newcomer around here. A slam drops Bundy and another drops Studd (including another slam for another $15,000) and it’s back to Super for a slam of his own with Heenan failing to make a save. Big finally charges into a boot in the corner and Heenan actually comes in for some forearms in the corner.

As you might expect, that earns him a heck of a bump over the corner and a quick tag (with Heenan laying face first on the apron) to Bundy. A bearhug keeps Big in trouble and Studd even adds a top rope forearm to the back. Heenan’s cheap shots draw Hulk in so Studd can choke away in the corner. You would think wrestlers would get that through their head one day but it hasn’t happened yet. Bundy’s Avalanche crushes Big in the corner but Bundy celebrates too long, allowing Hulk to switch places. Heenan comes in and it’s the big boot for the pin at 9:35. The pin was on Heenan in case you’re kind of stupid.

Rating: C. Oh yeah I’m going to have a good time with this. That ending was perfect for something like this as the fans get to see Heenan take a quick beating while Hulk (whatever his last name is) gets to look good. These six man tags are perfectly fine and a great way to send the fans home happy. Fun match and that’s all something like this is supposed to be.

Hulk pulls the mask up to reveal…..eh some Scooby Doo villain.

Randy Savage vs. Pedro Morales
Date: October 28, 1986
Location: Broome County Arena, Binghamton, New York
Attendance: 6,400

Savage’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line. This is a dark match at a Superstars taping and apparently the first time the Superstars banners hung in the rafters. We hit the stall button to start as Savage hits the floor to yell at fans until Pedro sends him into the barricade. Back in and a should gives Pedro one but Savage bails again. A shot to the throat drops Savage again as Morales certainly isn’t your standard good guy with this offense. Savage works on the arm but gets flipped over for his efforts.

That means the third time to the floor where Savage has to yell at Liz to stay in the corner. Back in and we go further into Memphis as Savage uses a phantom foreign object to rake the eyes. Pedro is back with some flowers (for Liz) to the face but Savage throws him hard out to the floor. Savage is right after him with a top rope ax handle and Pedro is in trouble in a hurry. Back in a Savage dives into a left hand as this is starting to drag. Pedro slugs away but gets tripped, allowing Savage to throw his feet on the ropes for the pin at 7:47. It would have been nice if Morales was actually trying to kick out.

Rating: D. Ok so they’re not all going to be winners. This was slow paced and not much of an improvement over the norm for Pedro at this point. He was WAY past his prime and you could tell that Savage was having to slow things down to let him keep up. Still though, a slowed down Savage was still better than almost anyone else. Bad match though.

Paul Orndorff/Harley Race vs. Roddy Piper/Hulk Hogan
Date: December 9, 1986
Location: Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Phoenix, ArizonaAttendance: 15,200

I’m not sure on the date here as the DVD says December 9, but every other source I can find says December 10 (in Tuscon, Arizona). Also, the December 9 show is listed as a Superstars taping and you can see the Wrestling Challenge (December 10) banners in the rafters. Then again it’s not that hard to make a mistake with something like this. Also it’s not like it matters because HOGAN AND PIPER ARE ON THE SAME TEAM???? I’m not sure I know how to handle something like this.

It’s a brawl to start with Hogan and Piper (gulp) clearing the ring. Thankfully they do look at each other rather uncertainly until Orndorff jumps Piper to start things off. Hogan headbutts Paul and Piper throws him into Hulk’s boot before it’s off to Race. The fans are rather pleased at the idea of Hogan beating Harley up but also like Piper coming back in to work on the arm.

A hammerlock slam keeps Race in trouble and Hogan drops the arm over the rope. Piper comes back in and kicks away at Race’s shoulder but gets taken into the corner for some headbutts. Orndorff comes in for a top rope elbow but Piper sunset flips him for two more. Race misses the falling headbutt though and it’s Hulk (not Machine of course) time. The big boot drops Race but there’s no count. Back up and the legdrop looks to finish but Heenan comes in for the DQ at 6:23.

Rating: C. What am I even supposed to say about this? A match like this would be a blast and there’s nothing wrong with that, though I’m not sure why Hogan couldn’t get a pin here. This would be like Cena and Punk five years ago and those matches were fun too. That being said, has Harley Race ever not looked like he was in his early 60s? He’s 43 here and looks the same as he always did. I’m not sure if that’s good or not but it’s always been the case.

Hogan and Piper even do a big handshake after the match. I don’t know where my life is anywhere.

Dingo Warrior vs. Jose Estrada
Date: June 23, 1987
Location: Market Square Arena, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 10,555

I’m sorry what now? This is the Dingo (as in Ultimate) Warrior’s third match with the company, having debuted less than a week ago. He looks the same but is billed from Queens, New York and even starts with a leapfrog into an armdrag. Dang it someone get my medicine. I mean, it leads into a bad armbar but sweet goodness what have I stumbled into?

Estrada rakes the eyes and slugs away at the face and ribs to shocking success. We hit the neck crank and a chinlock (with a near fall actually) as this isn’t exactly the kind of match you would EVER expect from Warrior. One of the worst chinlocks I’ve ever seen (note the gap between the arm and Warrior’s chin) brings Warrior back to life. A gorilla press brings the fans back the same way but it’s back to the armbar as Warrior clearly has no idea how to string stuff together.

Back up and Estrada misses a charge….and is armdragged into an armbar for the THIRD time in about four minutes. Since it was just an armbar (or a lot of armbars), Estrada is back up and choking in the corner until Warrior makes the most standard comeback ever. An atomic drop sets up a Randy Savage style clothesline to put Estrada away at 6:13.

Rating: F+. That’s partially just for my head spinning at Warrior being announced from Queens. This was TERRIBLE as Warrior looked like he had no idea what he was doing out there, meaning the version we got was the IMPROVED version. It’s like he had all of two month’s worth of training and was given this weird gimmick (As Vince said: “What is a dingo warrior?”) because he was in great shape. Absolutely terrible match, but not even the fun kind of terrible. It certainly felt like something special though and that’s the entire point of this set so well done on that front.

Back in the vault, Charly and Sean talk about the Mega Powers. Charly talks about them forming on Saturday Night’s Main Event and Sean asks if she remembers the time when Hogan came out to save Savage from a 3-1 beatdown at the hands of Honky Tonk Man and the Hart Foundation. Ok so they’re talking about THE EXACT SAME NIGHT but points for trying something.

Mega Powers vs. Hart Foundation/Honky Tonk Man
Date: January 5, 1988
Location: Von Braun Civic Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Attendance: 8,500

No bell for this one as we start with Hogan and Neidhart (what an odd visual) shoving each other. Hogan avoids a charge and hits a running clothesline in the corner. He grabs Neidhart by the beard (THAT’S TOO FAR!) and hands it off to Savage for the elbows to the head. Neidhart takes Savage into the corner but Bret comes in and gets armbarred right back down. Bret’s hard clothesline takes over though and he gets two off the backbreaker. Honky Tonk misses the fist drop though and the hot tag brings in Hogan. House is cleaned in a hurry and the legdrop finishes Honky Tonk at 5:17.

Rating: D+. I would question how much there could be from a match where the Mega Powers barely broke a sweat but IT’S THE MEGA POWERS. It would have been weirder had this been a competitive match, even if the heel team was as talented as this one was. Hogan and Savage are one of those legendary teams and there’s no reason that this should have been anything but quick and mostly one sided.

Hogan gets Savage to pose and Randy looks almost confused by the fans’ reactions.

Owen Hart vs. Barry Horowitz
Date: March 8, 1988
Location: Viking Hall, Bristol, Tennessee

This is Owen’s tryout match. I watched these two in a match from later in the year when Owen was the Blue Angel so there’s a lot of potential here. Owen flips out of a wristlock to start and does that springboard into a hiptoss of his. Back up and Owen moonsaults over him, followed by a running dropkick into the corner. A middle rope knee gets a slow two as Owen is just crazy ahead of his time here.

An armbar slows things down but Barry is back up with a knee to the ribs and some choking. Barry drops a standing legdrop for two more but Owen backflips up and scores with a suicide dive (unheard of at this point). A slingshot stomp to the face (unheard of today too) has Barry in more trouble and a spinning high crossbody gets two back inside. Owen hits his belly to belly and a CRAZY long Swan Dive (I’ve never even seen Benoit hit one that far) for the pin at 5:45.

Rating: C+. It’s a bit sloppy at times but WOW this was amazing stuff for 1988. Considering that we were in the era where a high crossbody was a big deal, Owen hitting those crazy dives and slingshots was almost unthinkable. This belonged in a cruiserweight match on Nitro or something and he’s doing it before Wrestlemania IV. Owen would be hired pretty soon after this and that really shouldn’t be a surprised whatsoever.

WWF World Title: Andre the Giant vs. Randy Savage
Date: April 21, 1988
Location: New Haven Coliseum, New Haven, Connecticut
Attendance: 12,000

Andre is challenging of course and seems to crack Heenan up during the entrances. Another dark match main event and another match that I saw recently on the same show as Owen vs. Horowitz. For some reason Heenan goes after Liz, earning him a very early chase. Back in and Savage gets thrown down off a lockup before Andre hammers away in the corner. Andre sits on him for good measure as the fans chant for Hogan. They settle for Andre cranking on the arms instead as Liz gets on the apron. Andre goes after her though and that’s enough for Savage to use a chair for the DQ at 3:21.

Rating: F. This was a glorified segment and really didn’t need to be here. They’ve had good matches before (like the one I mentioned) so they would have been better off just cutting this one. There’s only so much you can do with Andre but Savage has proven that he’s capable of hanging in there with him so this felt more like a time issue than anything else.

Tag Team Titles; Demolition vs. Powers of Pain
Date: June 21, 1988
Location: Civic Center, Glenn’s Falls, New York
Attendance: 6,000

Demolition is defending. This is supposed to be a dream match but I’m really not seeing it. The Powers are substituting for Strike Force and therefore have Tito Santana in their corner. It’s a brawl to start while the music is still playing and Demolition is knocked outside. Ax wants time out and I NEED Monsoon to say there are no time outs in the sport of professional wrestling.

We pause for a good bit until Demolition is ready to go with Ax and Warlord starting it off. Actually hang on for some more stalling as the brawl is the only contact two minutes in. The staring continues as the other two get in as well. Three minutes in now and STILL no lock up. They lock up at a ridiculous three minutes and forty two seconds in (Larry Zbyszko is somewhere calling them amateurs) and it’s Ax losing a battle of the shoulder blocks.

Even more stalling leads to Ax getting in some forearms, only to be knocked out to the floor. Barbarian and Smash come in for some stalling but a test of strength is denied. Barbarian FINALLY picks up the pace with some right hands and a running headbutt as everything breaks down. The champs are sent into each other and manager Mr. Fuji gets decked. That’s enough for Demolition, who walks out for the countout at 7:15.

Rating: F-. Holy sweet merciful chicken sandwiches with meatballs and a cold Sprite this was a waste of time. I’m still not sure who looked at the Powers of Pain and thought they should be faces (though the same could be said about Demolition) but egads this was horrible. Thankfully they were turned heel in a few months but this was easily the worst thing on the set so far. Why did this even warrant inclusion?

Back to the vault where they’ve both found a tape to watch. Sean has Wrestlemania V (please, I’ve suffered enough) but Charly has a tape from April 4, 1989 (two days after Wrestlemania V). She wants to watch the whole thing while Sean wants to know why these weren’t Coliseum Video exclusives.

Andre the Giant vs. Big John Studd
Date: April 4, 1989
Location: Civic Center, Glenn’s Falls, New York

The WEASEL chants are out in strong form tonight. Andre chokes him into the corner to start but Studd slugs away without much effort. We’re in the bearhug less than a minute in as I’m longing for Wrestlemania I. Some shots to the ribs almost put Andre down but a headbutt staggers Studd.

We hit the standing nerve hold as this is firmly in slow motion so far (not exactly shocking). More slugging leads to Andre choking with the singlet until he goes head first into Studd’s knee. I’m guessing that’s what they were going for at Wrestlemania when Andre suddenly went down despite Jake Roberts not really hitting him. Studd hammers away until Heenan comes in for the DQ at 7:46.

Rating: D-. Well what else were you expecting here? There was almost no way this was going to be good but you kind of have to know that’s the case coming in. Studd wouldn’t be around much longer and really, I’m not sure what else people were expecting him to do other than a weak feud with Andre. Terrible match here but Andre was a shell of the shell that he was earlier in the 80s.

Randy Savage vs. Ultimate Warrior
Date: April 4, 1989
Location: Civic Center, Glenn’s Falls, New York

Same show as the previous match and Savage already has Sherri with him. Savage jumps Warrior (looking weird in black boots) but gets knocked to the floor and punched in the face for his efforts. Warrior gorilla presses him back in and ties Savage in the Tree of Woe (a spot you don’t often see in this era) for some stomping. A charge misses though and Warrior gets kneed out to the floor in a heap.

Back in and we hit the chinlock as the fans are all over Sherri. A double ax gives Savage two but Warrior punches him into the corner. Cue new Intercontinental Champion Rick Rude to annoy Warrior (possibly by holding the title upside down) as Warrior gets two off an atomic drop. The Warrior Splash hits knees (possibly because Warrior aimed for them) but it’s time to shake the ropes. The real comeback is on but Warrior goes after Rude and it’s a countout at 7:10.

Rating: C-. After everything else we’ve been sitting through, this was a minor miracle. Warrior was nowhere near capable of going toe to toe with Savage (then again almost no one ever was) so Randy was helping him along here. Both guys are protected by the finish too and this was about as good as Warrior was going to get in this circumstance around this time.

Warrior comes back with the stolen Intercontinental Title to clean house.

Ted DiBiase vs. Dusty Rhodes
Date: June 6, 1989
Location: Dane County Coliseum, Madison, Wisconsin

Dusty has been in the company for all of a week at this point. Before the match, DiBiase offers Dusty money so that he won’t have his career ended like Jake the Snake (Jake was out with a back injury attributed to DiBiase in a move you don’t see enough anymore). Dusty punches him in the face though and Ted (looking weird with no wrist tape) drops the money, which Dusty gives to the fans (though a lot of it falls on the floor).

Back in and Dusty punches him out to the floor again, only to have an atomic drop send Ted outside for a third time. If nothing else that gives us DiBiase’s great fall over the top, which I’ve always been a huge fan of. Dusty rams Ted and Virgil’s heads together and it’s time to dance, drawing a VERY solid reaction from the northern crowd.

DiBiase takes him down and hits a middle rope elbow, followed by those sweet falling punches. Dusty won’t stand for this being sent into the corner jazz but DiBiase elbows him down into a chinlock instead. Back up and Dusty punches him out of the air, followed by an elbow out to the floor. A suplex brings Ted back in but Virgil trips Dusty to give DiBiase the pin at 10:00.

Rating: C+. This was interesting in a couple of ways. First of all, it shows how big a star Dusty really was. Having not been a regular north of the Carolinas for YEARS, he came off like a total star here with the fans treating him like a huge deal. It shows you that star power and charisma (which Dusty had in spades) will always shine through, which is a great lesson to learn. Also, assuming what I’ve seen elsewhere is true, the loss was to show that Rhodes was willing to put people over, which was a major fear for the WWF roster. Thankfully he was smart enough to just be a talent, which still had a lot of value.

Finally, and easily my favorite, I love watching DiBiase move in a ring. I know he’s best known for his talking and character work but there was a certain smoothness to him in the ring that few others have. Any flip or landing looked perfect and it was a signature style of his that I don’t remember anyone else having. I always liked it and DiBiase looked like a really skilled guy out there, which is overlooked far too often.

Dusty cleans house post match to some hearty applause.

King Duggan/Hillbilly Jim vs. Haku/Andre the Giant
Date: July 19, 1989
Location: Memorial Auditorium, Utica, New York

What a gloriously odd combination. Duggan took the King’s Crown from Haku about two months prior. No contact for the first minute. Make that a minute and a half. Two minutes now as we establish that Duggan’s 2×4 and Hillbilly’s horseshoe are on the floor. They FINALLY start slugging it out over two minutes in with Duggan hammering Andre and Hillbilly choking Haku in the corner.

The USA chants get stronger and stronger as the good guys take over, only to have Andre impose his Andreness on Duggan to take over. Andre crushes Duggan in the corner and it’s off to Haku to work on the neck. A dropkick misses though and Duggan slugs away before ramming Haku and Andre’s heads together for a double knockdown. Hillbilly comes in for two off a shoulder but gets caught with something that looked low.

Andre charges into a pair of knees in the corner but Duggan gets punched down without much effort. Haku tries a sunset flip but lands on Duggan’s back, seemingly injuring Jim’s knee in the process. It’s quickly off to Hillbilly, who gets caught by a certain French giant. Andre holds the arms but Hillbilly avoids Haku’s superkick (ala Wrestlemania VI), allowing Duggan to hit a pair of three point clotheslines for the pin on Haku at 9:12.

Rating: C-. Well that was….something. I love these random matches that you might see on an old Coliseum Video and this is a great example of why. There’s no reason for this match to be taking place but here it is, in all its glory. The Jim’s were fine for a midcard team like this though I don’t think they ever teamed on TV. Fine enough, though they did just beat a team who would be Tag Team Champions by the end of the year.

Charly and Sean are going through a box labeled 89-90 tryouts. We see Sean’s tryout tape (from 1988 but close enough) and it’s nothing special whatsoever.

Bryan Adams vs. Barry Horowitz
Date: August 9, 1989
Location: Selland Arena, Fresno, California
Attendance: 9,000

Crush looks weird here with a beard and worse hair than usual, though you can tell he’s a powerhouse. Barry gets shoved outside to start, followed by a dropkick to put him out there again. Back in and Barry bounces off of him before getting caught in a bearhug. Barry slips out and gets in some offense, including a gutwrench suplex for two with Adams powering out on the kickout. A delayed vertical suplex (which he made look easy) plants Horowitz and a Tombstone is good for the pin at 5:34.

Rating: D. You can see two things here. First of all, it’s EASY to see why Adams kept a job for so long as he looked like a monster with a great build and general presence to him. However, the other thing you can see is how lame he was in the ring. There was almost nothing noteworthy about his abilities and that’s only going to get you so far. Of course this is the WWF and the look alone is going to get you a few feet in the door.

Earthquake Evans vs. Paul Roma
Date: September 20, 1989
Location: Louisville Gardens, Louisville, Kentucky

This is the debut for the Earthquake name as he had actually wrestled two dark matches under the name John Tenta back in March. He’s a lumberjack here (what an odd look) and has Slick in his corner. Roma is kind of a jerk (but don’t worry because Bret Hart said he could have been the greatest jerk of all time) but Crank It Up was such a sweet theme song.

Evans, in a lumberjack shirt and black pants, shoves him down without much effort and shrugs off some right hands. Roma actually does take him down with an armdrag into an armbar but his crossbody is countered into a backbreaker. A bearhug doesn’t go very far so Earthquake slowly works him over in the corner. Earthquake misses a charge though and Roma scores with three straight middle/top rope forearms to the head. A VERY high dropkick actually puts the big man down but Roma misses a crossbody. Earthquake drops a big elbow for the pin at 6:57.

Rating: D-. Really slow here but you could see the potential in Earthquake. Once they got him out of the lumberjack look and made him look like a monster instead of a guy filling in time during the off season, things would get a lot better. He was headlining Summerslam against Hogan less than a year later so they certainly did something right. Not a good match of course as it needed to be cut in half and with far less offense from Roma.

Powers of Pain vs. Rockers
Date: January 22, 1990
Location: Miami Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 15,063

This is the day after the Royal Rumble and I’m not sure why this warrants inclusion. Shawn and Barbarian start things off and you can imagine how far Shawn is pushed away off the lockup. Everything breaks down in a hurry and it’s double superkicks and clotheslines to put the Powers on the floor. We settle down (and change corners for some reason) to Marty vs. Warlord with Jannetty having to keep things fast. A blind tag…..doesn’t keep Shawn in very long as it’s almost immediately back to Marty.

Maybe Shawn should have stayed in as a good looking powerbomb plants Jannetty for two. One heck of a launch into a face first crash gives Warlord the same and Barbarian boots him outside. The Powers trade places and Shawn is about to deck the ref (I mean, it’s a Hebner so maybe the threat stuck all the way to Montreal). Marty shrugs off some right hands but dives into a good looking powerslam. Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow though and the hot tag brings in Shawn. Everything breaks down again until Fuji trips Shawn for the DQ at 7:54.

Rating: C. Pretty standard power vs. speed match and there’s always room for something like that. Marty played a good Ricky Morton here, which he often did over the team’s run. The Powers of Pain would split soon as there was just no need for them with Demolition and the soon to arrive Legion of Doom.

The beating continues post match with Marty taking something like a super Hart Attack. With Shawn down, HULK HOGAN of all people makes the save. Well that’s why this was included and I can certainly understand why. Other than nearly killing the Rockers when he was looking for Randy Savage at Main Event II, I couldn’t imagine Hogan lowering himself to their level at this point.

Tag Team Titles: Colossal Connection vs. Demolition
Date: January 23, 1990
Location: Civic Center, Fort Myers, Florida
Attendance: 5,000

Andre and Haku are defending in what must be an early Wrestlemania dry run. On a side note, assuming what I’ve seen is true, this is the same show where Scott Hall made his company debut yet we’re seeing this instead. How odd indeed. Or maybe that wasn’t filmed, which is always a possibility. Haku and Smash start things off with Smash getting pummeled in the corner (not quite clubberin but it’s close).

The ax handles get Smash out of trouble and a tag with the referee not paying the slightest bit of attention brings Ax in. We’re in an early chinlock from Ax, followed by a neck crank from Smash. Haku finally fights up and brings in the much bigger man to stand on Smash’s chest. Smash does manage to get in a shot to the ribs though and Demolition manages to hammer Andre down.

Andre opts to grab Ax’s face to take over though and the champs get him down in the corner. We hit the choke with the singlet, followed by the worst looking shoulders in the corner I’ve ever seen. I mean Andre’s shoulders are a good foot from Ax’s ribs, though thankfully he’s barely selling them. Haku charges into an elbow and the hot tag brings in Smash (quite the reaction too) as everything breaks down. A double clothesline drops Andre and Demolition stupidly hits him with the titles for the DQ at 8:04.

Rating: D. Demolition looked really dumb here and that’s not exactly their style. That’s something you would expect more out of a Hogan match and I mean that as a rather strong insult. The Connection not being the most thrilling team in the world didn’t help things either and Andre was looking especially lumbering out there.

Intercontinental Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Randy Savage
Date: January 23, 1990
Location: Civic Center, Fort Myers, Florida
Attendance: 5,000

Savage (now the King) is challenging of course but FAR more interesting is the fact that this is raw footage, meaning there’s one angle for the entire match (only from the hard camera), complete with a time counter on the bottom of the screen. That certainly makes this feel unique, which is the entire point of something like this.

Sherri’s early distraction lets Savage knee Warrior to the floor but again the high crossbody is pulled out of the air. Warrior stomps away in the Tree of Woe, followed by a backslide of all things for two. A backdrop gives us Savage’s sweet looking bump to the floor but Sherri gets in some eye raking for a breather. Savage is right back with a top rope ax handle for two, only to miss a crossbody and fall out to the floor.

Warrior can’t even get back up though and it’s the big elbow for two. The loaded purse gets the same and NOW the kickout gets a good reaction. Warrior Warriors Up and some clotheslines have Savage tied up in the ropes. A missed charge sends Warrior to the floor though with Savage following for the double countout at 8:14 (even though Warrior was ON HIS FEET IN THE RING when the referee counted ten).

Rating: B-. They were really starting to figure each other out at this point and that made for much better matches. I know Warrior wasn’t exactly an in-ring star but to go from where he was in 1987 to where he is here is absolutely remarkable. He was a lumbering oaf back in the day and now he’s a lumbering oaf having some snappy matches. Things would get even better in about fourteen months when these two had a masterpiece at Wrestlemania VII but for the time, this was very surprisingly good stuff.

Disc 2

Sean and Charly talk about how fun this has been with Sean mentioning Alfred Hayes’ God Save the Queen party back in the day. They drop a tape (giving us a shot of an Ultimate Warrior Wrestling Buddy for some serious points) as Charly asks Sean why he’s here. Sean ducks the question and pulls out Wrestlemania VI. Charly says she was in daycare during that show and we see a clip of Mary Tyler Moore at Wrestlemania. Sean: “After that, I really felt like I made it after all.”. Charly: “I don’t get it.”. I don’t care how well she’s rocking the jeans she has on in this thing. That is unacceptable.

Earthquake vs. Hulk Hogan
Date: April 3, 1990
Location: Onondoga War Memorial, Syracuse, New York

Two days after Wrestlemania VI here so Hogan is actually on a losing streak. Earthquake (now in his signature gear) jumps Hogan to little avail as some right hands have the big man in trouble. Some running shots can’t drop Earthquake but a jumping knee gets him half down.

Hogan makes the mistake of going after Jimmy Hart though, allowing Earthquake to post him and take over. Some splashes in the corner and a backbreaker have Hart rather elated and a bearhug looks to make it even worse. It also makes me a bit sleepy as it stays on for a very long time, though it’s hard to complain about a dark match like this. The Earthquake gets two and Hogan makes the comeback to finish with the usual at 7:36.

Rating: C. It’s really pretty easy to see why these two made so much money together. Earthquake was big enough to look like a credible monster and you know Hogan knows EXACTLY what to do with someone like that. Throw in Earthquake putting him on the shelf for most of the summer and this was made of money. We weren’t quite there yet but there was a lot of gas left in Hogan’s tank, especially for something like this.

Posing ensues.

Big Boss Man vs. Ted DiBiase
Date: April 3, 1990
Location: Onondoga War Memorial, Syracuse, New York

Same show as the previous match and a match that was set up at Wrestlemania. DiBiase jumps him at the bell but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. The fast punches in the corner (Boss Man was great at those) look to set up a running splash but Virgil trips him up. Ted knocks Boss Man outside where the most livid kids I’ve ever seen yell at DiBiase with reckless abandon. Seriously, they impressed me.

Back in and the falling punch gives Ted two. It works so well that they do it again and Boss Man does his drunken selling (not a bad thing). A double clothesline puts both guys down, followed by Boss Man punching him out of the air. DiBiase gets backdropped to give us a good looking flip and a spinebuster draws Virgil in for the DQ at 4:13.

Rating: D+. No time to do much here but it’s more than anything we got on TV out of this. You would think this would be another layup of a match with Boss Man being able to play a blue collar guy against DiBiase’s money but for some reason it seemed to be a one off idea that was dropped without too much followup. Nothing to this one but it was fun for a bit.

The double teaming is on post match but Boss Man fights back and handcuffs Virgil.

Rick Rude/Mr. Perfect vs. Ultimate Warrior/Kerry Von Erich
Date: August 8, 1990
Location: Providence Civic Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Attendance: 15,000

These would both be matches in about two and a half weeks at Summerslam. Warrior only has his cheek painted here and it’s a really weird look. The stall button is stuck again as a minute goes by before the heels get in the ring. Perfect gets in after about a minute and a half. Warrior and Perfect start but it’s quickly off to Von Erich for some hard right hands in the corner.

The fans are WAY into Kerry here, which really isn’t surprising given his crazy levels of charisma. The villains are sent outside and rammed into each other, meaning it’s time for a meeting. Back in and more right hands rock Perfect, including one to turn him inside out. Rude comes in and gets to face Warrior, meaning it’s time to hit the backpedal in a hurry.

It’s back to Von Erich for the Tornado Punch (seemingly not yet a finisher) and more right hands until Perfect knees him in the back. The necksnap keeps Tornado in trouble and it’s time to work on the leg, including a toehold on the phantom foot, which HAS to be a rib. Rude gets in some right hands and it’s straight back to Perfect for a chinlock.

You can hear Heenan’s instructions very plainly here and it actually adds a lot to the match, especially due to the lack of commentary. They don’t listen very well though and it’s Perfect dropkicking Rude by mistake, setting up the hot tag to Warrior. House is cleaned in a hurry and the Warrior Splash ends Perfect at 11:51.

Rating: C+. If there is a more fun match based on the participants involved alone, I can’t wait to see it. This was a ton of fun with the fans loving what they were seeing and Warrior having the manic energy to really carry things. Von Erich was a fresh addition too and when you have a perfect heel team like Rude and Perfect, what more can you ask for?

Legion of Doom vs. Demolition
Date: October 30, 1990
Location: Allen County Coliseum, Fort Wayne, Indianapolis

Well this works. For some reason they never actually had this one on TV, which makes little sense given how perfect it could have been. At least do it on a big house show and air it on Prime Time or something. Demolition is wrestling in masks here and has more sinister music, making them look like a bunch of generic jobbers.

LOD starts in on Crush’s arm until Animal throws him over the top. Smash (I think) gets in a cheap shot on the floor though and it’s Crush taking over back inside. The Decapitator is broken up and it’s back to Hawk to clean house with his variety of clotheslines. The top rope version pins Smash at 2:28. Well that was nothing.

War Eagle vs. Dale Wolfe
Date: January 8, 1991
Location: UTC Arena, Chattanooga, Tennessee

It’s another one with the time counter on the screen. War Eagle is better known as Tatanka and for some reason he comes out to the old Young Stallions’ song Crank It Up, which doesn’t fit whatsoever with the war dance around the ring. What does fit is his crazy awesome physique which is up there with Lex Luger’s.

Wolfe bails to the floor to start before coming back in, only to get armdragged outside again. That means a walk up the aisle until Wolfe comes back in to get his arm cranked. Wolfe fights back and grabs a chinlock, which goes as well as you would expect. We hit the war dance before some chops, followed by the Samoan drop to give Eagle the pin (with the camera zooming in on the crowd during the count for no apparent reason) at 4:56.

Rating: D-. Pretty bad match here as Eagle didn’t have the fire in his comeback but it’s easy to see why they kept at it with him based on the physique alone. For some reason it took him the better part of forever to get onto the actual shows but once he got there, he had a very nice midcard career for himself.

Charly finds Rick Martel’s “Yes I Am A Model” button on top of a tape of a blindfold match from two months before Wrestlemania VII. We recap the story of Martel blinding Jake Roberts with his Arrogance cologne to set up their match at Wrestlemania, which saw them both wearing hoods (including a hole you could see through).

Jake Roberts vs. Rick Martel
Date: January 29, 1991
Location: Savannah Civic Center, Savannah, Georgia

This is a blindfold match and seems to be a practice match for their disaster at Wrestlemania VII. The bell rings before they put the blindfolds on so we get a good bit of stalling. After a minute of waiting to put them on, the bell rings again because this whole time thing is confusing.

Just like at Wrestlemania, Jake uses the crowd to help him find Martel and we get some early stumbling around without any significant contact. Martel gets him down and chokes away, only to miss a backdrop attempt as Jake runs by him. Things reset again and Martel goes to the floor for no apparent reason. A touch of the snake bag freaks Rick out but he finally manages to pull Jake outside for a ram into the apron.

That works fine….and then Martel loses him. Instead he finds a chair and pokes at nothing with it, eventually backing into and hitting the post with said chair (same spot from Wrestlemania). Speaking of Wrestlemania, can we watch that instead? It’s actually better than this mess.

Martel finally gets back in as we’re somehow SEVEN MINUTES into this. They bump into each other with Martel getting in some right hands and a slam before missing an elbow drop (see also: Wrestlemania VII). Martel finally gives up and takes the hood off to knock Roberts into the ropes. Arrogance is loaded up but Martel gets caught with the DDT for the pin at 8:44.

Rating: F. It was stupid at Wrestlemania and this was even worse without Bobby Heenan making a mockery of the thing (Heenan: “Excuse me. MARTEL! HE’S ON THE FLOOR!”). This wasn’t even a match as Jake hit a single move the whole time and Martel might have hit seven (if you count three right hands as three). This would have been a better inclusion if we hadn’t seen it before in a somehow better version.

Ted DiBiase vs. Sid Justice
Date: July 8, 1991
Location: Saddledome, Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Attendance: 8,500

What in the holy sweet name of donuts and red Gatorade is this? Actually this would be Sid’s WWF in-ring debut as he had left WCW less than two months earlier. Sherri offers an early distraction so DiBiase can get in a cheap shot, only to get dropped by a chokeslam. The screeching is on early as Sid knocks him outside and an atomic drop does it again, this time with one of those great DiBiase bumps.

DiBiase tries to brawl on the floor and is quickly posted as you might expect. Sherri offers a distraction though, allowing Ted to get in a loaded purse shot…which doesn’t even drop Sid off his feet. Some right hands give DiBiase two with the power kickout scaring the heck out of Sherri. That falling middle rope elbow misses though (as always) and Sid scores with a Stinger Splash. The powerbomb ends Ted at 5:41.

Rating: D. Here’s the thing that got Sid so over: sure he’s horrible in the ring and no he can’t work a match to save his life but he has that pure, raw charisma and fans are going to gravitate to that every single time. That’s what he did here and the fans were into him, even in a promotion he had never worked in before. That’s impressive and the match worked as a result. Well that and having DiBiase in there too.

Undertaker vs. Ultimate Warrior
Date: August 19, 1991
Location: War Memorial, Rochester, New York

Casket match, which was a brand new concept at the time. Back in April, Undertaker had sealed Warrior inside a casket, which eventually lead to Jake Roberts teaming up with Undertaker. The Warrior vs. Roberts feud never happened as Warrior was released from the company about a week after this, but the build was excellent and gave us Undertaker’s face turn soon after this.

Warrior slugs away on the floor to start and knocks Undertaker into the steps, which barely registers any response. They get inside where Warrior is cut off with a clothesline and a running boot in the corner. A slam has no effect on Undertaker so Warrior tries his running clotheslines instead.

Undertaker uppercuts him down and hits the safest Tombstone of all time to knock Warrior lukewarm. Choking won’t get Warrior in the casket as it revives him instead. How exactly did that guy work anyway? Undertaker finally gets him in but, after waiting the better part of thirty seconds with his hand on the lid, can’t shut the thing. Instead, Warrior steals the urn and clocks Undertaker, setting up the win at 5:39.

Rating: D+. There’s a reason this idea has been around for so many years. It might not be the most complicated thing in the world but it’s a perfect way to keep someone protected while also giving the winner a victory. Undertaker would of course be fine as losing a dark match isn’t going to hurt anyone. Bad match of course, but the fans were WAY into the near finishes.

Warrior leaves and Undertaker pops out of the casket, making the zombie look feel all the stronger.

Ric Flair vs. Roddy Piper
Date: October 1, 1991
Location: Huntington Civic Center, Huntington, West Virginia

Another dark match at a Prime Time taping with the time code included. They had been trading insults on TV in recent weeks so the crowd should be hot here. Flair even has the uncensored Big Gold Belt to really make it feel different. Piper wastes no time in hammering away in the corner and raking Flair’s eyes on the top rope ala Arn Anderson.

They head outside with Flair getting the better of it (that’s an odd one) before losing a chop off back inside. Ric goes to the eyes though (that’s more like it) and now the chops work a bit better. It’s already off to the leg with some kicks and the cannonball but Piper does his best Sting impression when he no sells the chops in the corner. Flair gets slammed off the top (such a stupid Nature Boy) but a classic low blow brings Piper down again. It’s chair time but the ref gets bumped, meaning there’s no count off Piper’s small package.

In the most ridiculous visual I’ve seen in a long time, a second referee comes in, bypasses Piper covering Flair to check on the down referee, and then JUMPS UP to count a pin on Piper when Flair rolls him up at 5:54. There’s no bell though and Piper beats Flair up some more, only to have the referee take the chair away. Flair grabs another rollup to pin Piper again at 6:52. Geez was Piper in trouble or something?

Rating: C. The wrestling worked just fine, which was all you could have expected given how many times these two have fought each other. Their stuff about nine years earlier was excellent and there was no reason to believe this would have been anything else. The ending was ridiculous though and I have no idea why they jobbed Piper twice (more than he had done in most years) in less than a minute. At least tell me the referee was fired for being that biased.

Post match Piper stays on Flair, hitting a few weak chair shots.

Back to Charly and Sean, including a box labeled No Holds Barred: Alt Ending. I laughed. Anyway, Charly finds a taped labeled Mr. Madness, which is a house show only character that Randy Savage did after losing his career at Wrestlemania VII. In other words, it’s the original Juan Cena. This is fallout from the Savage/Liz wedding reception where Jake and Undertaker interrupted with a cobra because they’re real villains.

Mr. Madness vs. Jake Roberts
Date: November 12, 1991
Location: Springfield Civic Center, Springfield, Massachusetts
Attendance: 8,500

Dig that Trust Me entrance music for Jake! Unfortunately Mr. Madness isn’t a costume or anything and is just the same old Savage. You know, because that’s a huge problem. But really, not even a mask or a different outfit or anything. Kind of disappointing really. Savage is all over him to start and elbows Jake (wearing a snake handler’s glove) in the throat, only to get kneed in the ribs.

Some choking on the ropes sets up the snap left hands. The DDT is broken up but Savage is sent outside as the beating continues. Jake gets posted though and Savage hits the top rope ax handle. Savage chairs him down and even though there’s no bell, we’ll say it’s a DQ at 4:32.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here and I was actually disappointed by having Mr. Madness just be the same old Savage. If it’s just a house show, just say that it’s a trial period or something. I don’t get the idea here but it’s not like it really matters. What does matter is how the match was nothing as Savage showed far less fire than usual and got beaten up for a long time before snapping at the end. It makes sense, but their match less than a month later at This Tuesday in Texas was great.

More chair shots send Jake bailing before he can pull out the snake.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Ric Flair
Date: November 12, 1991
Location: Springfield Civic Center, Springfield, Massachusetts
Attendance: 8,500

Same show as before with Hogan defending, but more importantly this includes the FAKE Big Gold Belt, which is exactly what it sounds like. They were still doing the Real World Champion deal but had lost the NWA World Title so this was something they had made. It was never on TV (the blurred belt was often a Tag Team Title, which looked ridiculous in person) and to the best of my knowledge, there’s only one actual photo of the thing. Oddly enough it looks like a cross between the Big Gold Belt and the AWA World Title, which is quite the visual. Flair also has Mr. Perfect with him.

The crowd is RABID for Hogan here and we hit the early stall button. The only contact in the first two minutes is Flair shoving Hogan away. A second shove gets us to two and a half minutes and Flair won’t lock up. More walking around and WOOing ensues until Hogan draws a line on the mat. Flair crosses it with a headlock and Hogan actually goes down to one knee. A shoulder puts Flair down and it’s time to slow down again, this time with Hogan getting the headlock.

Hogan clotheslines him to the floor and the fans are going nuts for their hero. Back in and Flair says he’s been there twenty four times (not even he could think he has that many World Titles so I’m not sure what that means) but a poke to the eye puts Hogan in trouble. Hogan no sells the chops and fires off right hands in the corner, followed by biting the forehead. In the words of Gorilla Monsoon, perhaps hungry.

The Flair Flip sets up a clothesline off the apron and that’s enough for a walk up the aisle. Ever the champion, Hogan won’t let that happen and drags Flair back inside and is promptly snapmared down for a knee to the head. Flair whips him into the corner but Hogan drops to the mat for some reason (like you would on a regular running the ropes spot), meaning Flair has to jump over him to hit the buckle.

Hogan trips him up from behind and rakes the face to complete a rather strange (yet effective) sequence. Perfect offers a distraction though and it’s time to go after the knee. A good crotching against the post keeps Hogan in trouble and the knee is kicked again. The Figure Four is broken up but since Flair never learns, Hogan breaks it up a second time.

Speaking of never learns, Flair, top rope, slam. Hogan yells at the referee though, allowing Perfect to slip in the foreign object for the knockout shot. The Hulking Up is on but Flair bails outside after the big boot. Hogan follows and gets poked in the eye for his efforts but is still able to send Flair into the steps for the countout win at 14:54.

Rating: B. Heck of a match here but it’s a great example of why Hogan vs. Flair never worked in the WWF. Simply put: no one is going to buy Flair as a threat to win the title. Hogan doesn’t get pinned and he’s never going to give up in the Figure Four, so why should I buy that Flair is going to take the title? Flair was a great character and knows how to get people to care about him, but it was still a culture clash with Flair not being able to do his style of a match (meaning he would need at least half an hour) and never being a real threat. It was a good idea on paper, but practically this was never going to work.

Posing ensues.

And now, a Piper’s Pit from Toledo, Ohio on April 7, 1992 with Piper fresh off losing the Intercontinental Title. Piper brings up losing the title and praises Bret as a great champion. He was about to leave and go mess with his Jetski but the company wanted him back for some Pits. The company is going through some scandals at the moment (whoa) and it’s time to get something positive going.

Tonight, the Pit is going to be based on audience participation. Therefore, whenever the fans think the person is lying, they need to make a barking noise. The first guest: the Brooklyn Brawler with Piper asking fans for questions. First up is why doesn’t Brawler take a bath? Brawler says he’s a millionaire. Piper asks what that’s going to do with taking a bath but Brawler says he’s going TO BE a millionaire.

Brawler won’t look at Piper but eventually says he’ll be the next World Heavyweight Champion. Piper: “I ain’t never seen you win a match.” He’ll do it by not doing what Piper did at Wrestlemania so Brawler grabs the bell (which Piper refused to use against Hart, and if you don’t that, you shouldn’t be here). Violence is threatened so Piper pokes him in the eye and clocks Brawler with the bell instead.

Bret Hart vs. British Bulldog
Date: June 30, 1992
Location: Broome County Arena, Binghamton, New York
Attendance: 4,000

Bret’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line and I’m assuming this is a practice match for Summerslam. Well in theory it’s non-title as the title is held up before the match and nothing is said. There’s always a chance that this might have been planned for a home video release and then changed so maybe the announcement would be dubbed in later. A headlock and shoulder block go badly for Bret as he gets knocked all the way outside.

Back in and Bret takes him down with a headlock for a change before a small package gets two. It’s an interesting style here as they’re moving very fast in bursts and then slowing it back down. The movement is very crisp though, as you might expect. Bulldog escapes the headlock and grabs a hammerlock to start in on the arm. Back up and it’s Bret cranking on the arm until Bulldog rolls away (that must be a family thing) and snaps on the armbar all over again. Bret fights up and gets in an atomic drop, followed by the chinlock.

Now it’s Bulldog getting up and trying the crucifix, only to get dropped hard on his back instead. A backslid gets two on Bret and the fans are WAY into these near falls. The middle rope elbow connects and Bulldog has a broken nose. The threat of a Sharpshooter has Bulldog scurrying for the ropes and an enziguri of all things puts Bret on his face. There’s the delayed vertical for two but Bret is right back up with a sleeper to slow things down. Bulldog fights up and it’s a double hiptoss to put both guys on the floor. Bulldog gets back in first but Bret jumps over him and grabs a German suplex for the pin at 14:20.

Rating: B. They weren’t quite up to the Summerslam level but that’s not exactly a fair comparison. These two definitely had chemistry together and it’s almost strange to see Bret get a clean pin on him. It’s also interesting that their famous match is so much different than this one. That shows how talented they are as they had two good matches with different structures while most people can’t even have one of them.

Papa Shango/Kamala vs. Bret Hart/Ultimate Warrior
Date: October 13, 1992
Location: Argidome, Regina, Saskatchewan, Canada

I’d give good money to hear either of these teams just having a conversation about anything. Bret literally won the WWF Title the day before and Warrior is in his weird singlet look here. Warrior and Kamala start with the guy with the painted moons on his stomach (Meaning Kamala. You know, that might actually need some clarification in this case as you never know with Warrior.) bails in fear. Instead he’ll try Bret and has to bail to the ropes to get out of an armbar.

For some reason Bret agrees to a test of strength (Ugandans are known for their Greco Roman Knuckle Locks) and then stomps on Kamala’s bare foot to show off some intelligence. Kamala hands it off to the guy with boots as I continue to be astounded that he’s the future Godfather. Some shoulders give Bret a breather but Kamala hits him in the throat to cut him off again. Shango charges into a knee though and it’s back to Warrior for three clotheslines on Shango, a slam to Kamala and the splash to pin Shango at 7:09.

Rating: D. This would have been bad even by house show main event standards, which is about as low as you can get at this point. Maybe Bret was still jazzed from winning the title or something but this one wasn’t working for me. Then again, what were you expecting with these combinations?

Undertaker vs. Bam Bam Bigelow
Date: January 26, 1993
Location: Convention Center, Fresno, California

There’s a timer at the bottom (though a different kind than the previous versions), the quality seems a lot lower and neither guy has an entrance. It’s also hard cam only again, which is always a weird way to watch wrestling. Bigelow waits over a minute before throwing the first punch and gets choked in the corner as a result. You can’t waste time around here like that.

Old School connects but the jumping clothesline misses and Undertaker falls out to the floor. They head outside….and we lose them because we only have the hard cam. Back in and Undertaker misses a charge in the corner, allowing Bigelow to hit a clothesline to the back of the head. A headbutt keeps Undertaker down but the top rope version misses, allowing Undertaker to finish with a chokeslam at 5:25. The fans RUN for the exits as the show is over in a funny visual.

Rating: D. Another weak one here but this wasn’t supposed to be anything other than sending a big name out there to end the long taping session. Undertaker vs. Bigelow is a match that could have been good under the right circumstances and that’s not the case in a five minute match where we couldn’t see part of it. Not good, but that’s not their fault.

A very excited Charly starts making Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle puns because she’s just that awesome. What you are about to see is real and a MAJOR reason why I wanted to see this set.

Toxic Turtles vs. Tommy Stevenson/Ron Preston
Date: March 9, 1993
Location: Augusta Civic Center, Augusta, Georgia
Attendance: 8,000

That would be Tom and Terry Turtle (Barry Hardy/Duane Gill respectively) and it’s EXACTLY what it sounds like. This lasted one night only for any two of the 19 obvious reasons you’ve thought of so far. The ring announcer makes sure to announce that the jobbers weigh 488lbs combined rather than saying one of the average sized guys weighs that on his own. For absolutely no apparent reason, the Turtles are from Terrytown, Texas. The costumes are TMNT costumes almost to perfection, even down to the masks.

Since you can’t see their faces, we’ll say Raphael starts with Preston and it’s a lot of rolling around while the fans are SILENT. Like even the kids aren’t responding, mainly because TMNT was WAY past its peak at this point. Donatello comes in for a double dropkick and a near fall but gets stuck on his shell and needs assistance getting up. These guys are like the anti-Hunchbacks.

Preston gets his arm worked over and the booing begins. Raphael comes back in for some chops to the head and a headbutt, followed by a slingshot hilo for the pin at 2:19. Stevenson was never in the match and it was crazy weird, but the Turtles fought with honor, and that’s all that matters. This was everything I expected and worse, but my goodness what a cool thing to see, just due to hearing about it for years.

Disc 3

To show you this show’s sense of humor and for you who will get this joke, this disc starts with Sean throwing away a box labeled T. Magee because there’s nothing in it. Again, I laughed. Next up is a box labeled 1993 Post WM 9. This next one might be a little scary.

Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez
Date: April 5, 1993
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 7,000

Well yeah it is scary. This is the day after Wrestlemania IX so that box is quite accurate. Also another one with the timer and hard cam only. Again: it’s so strange to have the music playing but not cutting to the entrance, meaning the first time you see Undertaker is as he gets on the apron.

Gonzalez jumps him from behind to start and sends Undertaker into a few buckles. A clothesline sends Undertaker outside and the camera shifts to the side so we can see the brawl. Back in and Gonzalez kicks him in the chest, followed by a clothesline to the floor. Undertaker comes right back with headbutts and uppercuts but Gonzalez steals the urn and clocks Undertaker for the DQ at 3:28.

Rating: F. Yeah there’s really defending Gonzalez as he really is one of the worst of all time. Part of the problem is he’s just so big and there’s not much that can be done with him. When Undertaker can’t do anything with you, you’re to the point where there’s nothing that can be done. This was somehow worse than Wrestlemania, which I didn’t think was possible.

Undertaker sits up and fights Gonzalez to the back. Somehow this kept going until Summerslam.

Smoking Gunns vs. Barry Horowitz/Reno Riggins
Date: April 5, 1993
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 7,000

Same show as the previous match and The Gunns are Kip Winchester (Billy) and Brett Colt (Bart). The Gunns are making their debut here and are virtually the same, save for a few (mostly cosmetic) changes. It’s even the same gear and entrance costumes. The female fans seem VERY pleased when the Gunns take their shirts off.

Billy and Barry start as we’re on the wide shot from the hard camera again. A hiptoss takes Barry down to start and we’re in an early armbar. Bart does the same as to Reno as they’re certainly not shying away from the early arm work. A double Russian legsweep gets two but the referee isn’t pleased with the cheating, allowing Barry and Reno (sounds like a bad Vegas act) to choke Bart in the corner.

Reno grabs an abdominal stretch as the Gunns are giving up a lot more than I would have expected here. A back elbow gives Barry two and it’s back to Reno for a chinlock. Back up and Bart shoulders him down, allowing the hot tag off to Billy. Everything breaks down and Billy cleans house with some dropkicks. A powerslam sets up the top rope bulldog to give Billy the pin at 9:41.

Rating: C-. Not half bad here as the Gunns were clearly good enough to get a job in the near future as a result. The Gunns were actually a pretty good team for their time, even though they were a pretty standard gimmick. That being said, the division was hardly worth anything in the first place so any good team (and the Gunns were one) was going to do well.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Mr. Perfect
Date: April 6, 1993
Location: Tuscon Convention Center, Tuscon, Arizona

Shawn is defending and the camera doesn’t move again. Perfect wastes no time in slugging away and the fans are right there with him. The running knee lifts knock Shawn into the corner and there’s a whip to send Shawn out to the floor. They brawl on the outside and it’s kind of hard to see what’s going on as they’re opposite the camera.

Back in with Shawn choking on the ropes until a hard right hand knocks him away. Shawn drops him again though and we hit the chinlock. The fans deem it perfect so at least they appreciate good chinlockery. I’m sure Shawn would agree too. Perfect fights up and slams Shawn down by the hair, followed by a toss across the phone by said hair. That’s followed by a crotching against the post and a hard shot to the head gives Perfect two.

The ref gets bumped and Shawn brings in the title, only to have it knocked away. There’s the PerfectPlex and a second referee comes in to count the pin at 6:05. As ring announcer Mike McGuirk declares Perfect “the new champion of the World Wrestling Federation Intercontinental Title”, the first ref waves it off because of the bump and Shawn retains via DQ.

Rating: C. Totally standard match here but the fans were entirely into the whole thing. They probably did this in every city and there’s nothing wrong with that as it gives the fans something fun and it’s not like there’s a ton of ways to know what’s going on at the moment, at least not to the masses. Also, better chemistry here than they had at Summerslam.

Skippy Taylor vs. Tazmaniac
Date: May 5, 1993
Location: Exposition Building, Portland, Maine
Attendance: 2,700

Now this is interesting as we have Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Taz when Taz was basically a caveman. Scotty is from Maine and would likely just be a local job guy at this point. Tazmaniac wristlocks him into a suplex but Taylor flips over his back into a dropkick. A hard headbutt puts Skippy (yes Skippy) down and it’s a Tazplex followed by a chinlock. Back up and Scotty (who is oddly the bigger guy here) gets suplexed again and we hit a neck crank. A sunset flip gives Taylor two and Taz goes up (Huh?), only to dive into a right hand to the ribs. Not that it matters as an overhead belly to belly gives Taz the pin at 3:30.

Rating: D. What were you expecting from a caveman character? Taylor was as generic of a wrestler as you could have asked for at this point and yet he still looked better than Taz. What are you expecting to get out of a caveman? Nothing match of course and I’m not surprised that neither guy was hired at this point, though Taylor likely wasn’t a candidate for a job anyway.

Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna
Date: May 5, 1993
Location: Exposition Center, Portland, Maine
Attendance: 2,700

Same show as before (but not a hard camera match for some reason) and the final match of the show. Bret gets a strong reaction as you might have guessed. We get the long delay for Yokozuna and Mr. Fuji’s ritual and you can hear Bret call him fat. Bret even jumps him during the salt throwing and alternates between shots to the head and stomach. See, he’s versatile. A clothesline takes Bret down though and it’s time to slow things up.

Choking on the ropes wakes Bret up a bit but his comeback earns him a right hand to the throat. A trip to the floor sees Bret going into the steps and the big leg crushes him again back inside. The brilliant fans chant USA to cheer on the Canadian….and it seems to work as Bret avoids the corner charges. A middle rope bulldog gives Bret two and a regular version drops the big man again. Bret gets the Sharpshooter but Fuji comes in for the DQ at 5:26.

Rating: D+. They weren’t trying here but a lot of that was due to the amount of time they had. It’s not like these two are going to have a great match in the first place and cutting it down to less than five minutes counting everything with the salt didn’t do it any favors. Yokozuna would get better after crushing Hogan in about a month.

Post match Owen Hart comes in for the save but gets beaten down until Bret makes the save with a chair.

Money Inc. vs. Mega Maniacs
Date: June 14, 1993
Location: Columbus Convention Center, Columbus, Ohio
Attendance: 3,700

Hogan/Beefcake of course in another Wrestlemania IX rematch. This is the day after King of the Ring 1993 and Money Inc.’s second match of the night after losing the Tag Team Titles to the Steiners earlier in the night (which they would win back two days later, only to lose them for good to the Steiners again three days later). Sgt. Slaughter is guest referee and you can see the Coliseum Video logos, meaning this was likely originally intended for home release but didn’t make it for whatever reason.

Money Inc. jumps them during the entrances and get cleared out in as short of a fashion as you would guess. Hogan poses and egads it’s still weird to see him this small in the WWF. More long form stalling ensues (definitely a thing back then and a lost art today) with Slaughter doing a weapons check as we’re finally ready to go two minutes plus after the bell. Hogan and DiBiase finally start….and we get a second bell. Egads why is this so complicated?

DiBiase forearms him in the back to start but Slaughter shoves Ted out of the corner when Hogan is on the ropes. How physical of him. Hogan uses the distraction to poke DiBiase in the eye (because Bobby Heenan was right about him being a no good cheater) and it’s off to Beefcake for some chops in the corner. IRS wants time out until DiBiase goes back in, walking right into an armdrag.

Ted suggests a hair pull and demonstrates it on Slaughter, but the fans (and Hogan) say it didn’t happen. Beefcake gets another armdrag and DiBiase says he did it again. Therefore Slaughter demonstrates the armdrag on DiBiase before tripping him down to give Beefcake two. Everything breaks down and it’s Hogan clotheslining IRS so Beefcake can hit him in the throat. Slaughter of course yells, so Hogan gets in a cheap shot. Hogan and Beefcake are making a snappy heel team here.

An IRS distraction finally lets DiBiase get in a few cheap shots and Slaughter cuts Hogan off from making a save. We’re firmly in the formula now, including IRS sweating profusely despite not doing much yet. DiBiase grabs a chinlock and now we get in an argument with Slaughter over the lack of a tag. Therefore, IRS has to let go of his chinlock so DiBiase can get in his own.

It’s back to IRS for more chinlockery as this is just dying in a hurry. Beefcake is up at the third arm drop and suplexes his way to freedom, allowing the hot tag to Hogan. Everything breaks down and IRS grabs the briefcase, which Hogan uses to clock DiBiase in the head. Slaughter then clocks both members of Money Inc….and disqualifies them at 12:21?

Rating: D-. What in the world was that supposed to be? Were they taking the night off (from that rigorous Hogan formula) and wanted to do something more “fun”? This might have worked if you cut off four minutes and REALLY toned down the Slaughter stuff (he came off as the star of the match) but as it was, total misfire here and really boring for the most part. Then again it’s not like the Wrestlemania match was anything good either.

Posing ensues, as is the custom.

Lex Luger vs. Ludvig Borga
Date: October 20, 1993
Location: Burlington Civic Center, Burlington, Vermont
Attendance: 2,500

Another Coliseum Video match and my goodness the fans have cooled on Luger since his Summerslam loss. Like he’s just a guy now. The USA chants begin and of course annoy Borga but just makes me think Jim Duggan could get an even stronger response at this point (impressive since he was gone from the company).

Borga powers him down to start and let’s stand around a bit. A shove sends Luger into the corner and we’re somehow almost three minutes into this. Luger shouts about Finland as Borga almost gets in a fight with a fan, who takes his shirt off.

The fans are rather pleased (no clue why) so Luger calms them down with a headlock. Well you wouldn’t want to get them too fired up. We stall some more and it’s time for a USA chant, followed by a wristlock from Luger. A shoulder and crossbody put Borga down for a second and it’s right back to the wristlock.

Lex charges into a boot in the corner though and Borga punches him down. But wait, let’s yell at the shirtless guy some more. At this point it’s clear why this didn’t make Coliseum Video and we’re all better for that. Of course it’s off to the chinlock before a clothesline gets two on Lex. Luger’s rollup gets the same but he comes back with the forearm for the pin at 11:13.

Rating: F. It’s kind of amazing how terrible Luger could be when he wasn’t motivated, which is made worse by how rarely he actually was motivated. This was terrible and one of the worst matches on the set so far. Then again that’s not surprising as this was a very dark era for the company and it wasn’t about to get any better.

Randy Savage vs. Crush
Date: February 1, 1994
Location: Westchester County Civic Center, White Plains, New York
Attendance: 3,000

The time clock is back. This is part of a big feud as Crush turned on Savage and cost him him announcer’s job, sending Savage over the edge (took about six inches of pushing) and into a rage for revenge. Savage jumps him on the floor to start and posts his head for good measure. They get inside with Savage going for the elbow way too early but getting distracted by Mr. Fuji anyway.

Savage grabs a chair instead but the referee yelling at him allows Crush to get in his first big shot. Suddenly we go to a very wide shot (blood maybe)…and then zoom back in like usual. Is the director drunk or something? Crush knocks him down and poses a bit, allowing Savage to grab a hiptoss. The ax handle sends Crush rolling outside and he sends Savage into the barricade.

Back in we hit the bearhug as the USA chants begin. At least there’s a Japanese flag to go with the Hawaiian villain. Some shots to the back keep Savage down and it’s off to a bow and arrow hold of all things. Not exactly what you would expect from Crush but it’s not a match people are supposed to see. A slow motion tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gives Crush two but Savage finally sends him into the buckle for a breather. Crush’s suplex is reversed so he goes for the salt, only to have it knocked into his face. Now the elbow can give Savage the pin at 8:54.

Rating: C-. Not bad at all here as Savage could sell perfectly and Crush could work the back more than well enough. The anger was there to start but kind of died near the end, though at least there was a story and some intensity. I’ve always liked this feud and while this was a far cry from their Wrestlemania match (which I liked as well), it was an improvement over what we’ve been seeing.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Jim Neidhart
Date: October 21, 1994
Location: Montreal Forum, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Attendance: 16,843

Bret is defending (in case you’re REALLY slow) as Neidhart returned earlier in the year to back Bret up, only to turn on him and side with Owen. I’ve seen these two have a title match from MSG in the same month and wasn’t incredibly impressed but maybe the Canadian air will help things out. Bret gets a hero’s reaction (of course) but Neidhart jumps him during the entrance.

Without even taking the jacket off, Bret comes back with a clothesline and the Sharpshooter, only to have Jeff Jarrett of all people run in for the beatdown. I believe the fans chant for Razor as we seem destined for a tag match but instead, this one begins (the bell never rang to start it) as Bret is mostly done. So yeah, Bret is getting screwed in a WWF World Title match in Montreal THREE YEARS EARLIER. Egads man stay in Calgary.

Bret avoids an early charge and hammers away before grabbing the beard. They head outside where Anvil forearms a post and Bret shoves Jarrett, who is still at ringside in a chair, over. Back in and Bret does the chest first buckle bump (well duh) and we hit a cobra clutch, which was actually called the Anvilizer. I have no idea why he called it that, what it means, or when in the world he ever used a sleeper to win a match but Neidhart could be a strange guy.

Neidhart lets it go and pounds him down as we’re into a pretty standard wheelhouse now. It’s off to the bearhug but Bret is out in a hurry, only to get kneed in the ribs for his efforts. The running powerslam (now that should be the Anvilizer) gets two and it’s back to the floor, hopefully with less forearming the post. That goes nowhere so Bret pulls him back in for a bulldog. The Russian legsweep gets two and Jarrett is rather pleased. Neidhart blocks the middle rope elbow though and catches Bret on top with the slam. For some reason Neidhart decides to try a top rope splash and the miss sets up the rollup to retain at 6:35.

Rating: C. They were smart to keep this short as I’m not sure how much longer Neidhart could have gone in a singles match. He’s very one dimensional (nothing wrong with that as there’s always a place for a power guy like Neidhart) and that’s not the best choice to go in a long match. Thankfully Bret is right there to keep things together, even with the rather pesky Jarrett interference, which didn’t mean anything in the end.

Sean is on a ladder with Charly saying this isn’t the safest thing in the world. Sean: “Try interviewing Andre the Giant after Bobby the Brain Heenan told him that I said he wasn’t a real giant.” He’s found some unseen ladder matches and Charly doesn’t buy it because everyone has seen the same ladder matches.

….and now here’s Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon from Wrestlemania X, but Charly stops the tape because that’s already been on a bunch of home releases. Ok that was funny.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. British Bulldog
Date: May 16, 1995
Location: O’Neil Center, Danbury, Connecticut
Attendance: 1,800

Jeff is defending, though oddly enough he would lose the title to Razor in a ladder match at a house show, only to get it back in another ladder match three days later. These were mentioned on Raw and would really make for a better entry here, assuming they were filmed. I’ve seen the one from three days before this via fan cam so they were very common around this time.

The camera work is much lower level than usual with a lot of moving over to other things rather than cuts. Jeff hammers away to start but gets caught in the (only slightly) delayed vertical suplex. That earns Bulldog a throw to the floor where Roadie gets in a clothesline as I wonder why Luger, who came to the ring with Bulldog, didn’t stick around. Of course just after I finish saying that, here’s Luger to punch Roadie in the face and chase him to the back. Bulldog gets in another suplex and the go outside (and off camera) until Bulldog brings in the first ladder.

Jeff makes a save and hits him in the ribs with the ladder before starting the climb. In one of the rare smart moves you’ll see in a ladder match, Jeff sees Bulldog coming and jumps down to kick him instead of being shoved over. Of course he’s shoved over a few seconds later but at least he did it right once. A ladder shot to the ribs puts Jeff down and Bulldog makes a very shaky climb, only to have it cut off as well. Bulldog whips him into the ladder again and goes up but gets dropkicked down. That’s enough for Jarrett to retain at 7:15.

Rating: C. Perfectly acceptable ladder match here, especially for a dark match at a Superstars taping. They didn’t have a ton of time but this was the paint by numbers version as it’s not like they had a ton of big match ladder matches to draw from at this point. Bulldog was fine for a quick challenger like this, though I’m kid of surprised that Jeff won clean.

Post match Bulldog goes after Jeff like a sore loser but Roadie comes in to chop block him. Luger makes the save.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Razor Ramon
Date: June 5, 1995
Location: Struthers High School, Struthers, Ohio
Attendance: 1,450

From a Raw taping and Jeff is defending in another ladder match. Hang on a second as Jeff says the belt is too high. The belt is lowered a bit, which would seem to make it easier for the taller Razor to retrieve. They slug it out to start with Razor of course getting the better of it until he ducks his head and gets caught in a swinging neckbreaker. Razor goes outside and grabs the ladder, which is quickly baseball slid (Slided? Sliden?) into his ribs.

Even in a short match like this, that’s way too early to go up so Razor gets back in for the save. Again though, Jeff is smart enough to come down and hit him in the ribs with the ladder. The ladder is dropped onto Razor but he makes another save. You may be noticing a pattern emerging here. This time it’s Jarrett catching Razor on top and shoving the ladder over to put both guys down.

The Razor’s Edge is broken up with Jeff backdropping him over the top, which of course means a banged up knee. The knee is fine enough to make another save though and they’re both down again. Jeff gets sent into the ladder in the corner a few times but one more shove down allowing him to retain the title at 10:23.

Rating: C+. This was much more the standard ladder match with a little more time to make it better. Jarrett and Ramon had some good chemistry together and it made for a better match as a result. It’s interesting that the matches are rather different with this one being more like a standard ladder match while the first was a match that happened to involve a ladder. Both were good though as Jarrett is a talented performer, as long as you keep him away from the main event scene.

Post match Razor gives him the Edge and picks up the title, only to drop it on the unconscious Jarrett.

Charly and Sean find a box of New Generation tapes and, after suggesting that Mooney lives in the vault (works for me), we have a tape of Shawn Michaels and Bret Hart as partners. Charly: “How does that sound?” Sean: “It sounds like it would be a heart break, kid.” Charly’s face tells you everything you need to know here.

Shawn Michaels/Bret Hart vs. Hakushi/Jerry Lawler
Date: July 26, 1995
Location: Kiel Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 10,500

Another Coliseum Video match. This happened a handful of other times but is still one of those things you never can imagine seeing. The villains jump them to start and the ropes seem a bit loose. Hakushi sends Bret into the corner to start and hits a cartwheel elbow. It’s off to Lawler for some choking before Hakushi comes back in for a knee drop. The threat of a Shawn (sporting a bit of a beard here) right hand scares Lawler away and it’s off to choking in the corner.

Hakushi’s Bronco Buster keeps Bret in trouble as this is one sided so far. Choking ensues on the ropes and then in the corner to continue the riveting pace. Shawn FINALLY does something by chasing after Hakushi and hitting him in the head. I mean, it would be better if he were legal so Bret pulls Lawler face first into the post. Bret finally avoids a charge and brings in Shawn to clean house. The top rope ax handle gets two and the elbow drop is good for the same as everything breaks down. The Sharpshooter puts Hakushi away at 11:41.

Rating: D-. This was terrible, which says a lot given how much chemistry Bret had with both of them. There’s not much he can do though in a choking special like this as no one seemed all that interested in working hard here. Shawn especially looked bored out of his mind and barely did anything until the very end.

WWF World Title: Diesel vs. Yokozuna
Date: July 26, 1995
Location: Kiel Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 10,500

Same show as before with Diesel defending in a cage. Diesel slugs away to start but gets dropped by a hard shot to the chest. Yokozuna misses the big elbow though and it’s time to lay down for a long time. Back up and Diesel hits a headbutt to drop the monster but falls down as well for the second double knockdown in less than three minutes. Diesel goes up first, only to get crotched on the top.

The big splash misses and let’s lay down again! Diesel catches him going out with a good crotching of his own, followed by right hands on the mat. That’s still not enough to get out though and Diesel goes into the cage. The big leg misses as Yokozuna is really bad at this leaving his feet thing. After sending Diesel into the cage again, Yokozuna decides to climb, freaking Jim Cornette out in the process.

That works as well as you would expect as Diesel sends him into the cage and knocks the big man down. Diesel is caged as well though and it’s ANOTHER double knockdown. Geez people come up with something new. They both go for an exit at the same time and it’s Diesel getting over the top before Yokozuna can make it through the door to retain at 11:20.

Rating: F. Egads what a mess of a match. They were out there for less than twelve minutes and somehow managed to have FOUR double knockdown spots. How do you even do that? This wasn’t going to be a good idea as Yokozuna was just too big at this point and there wasn’t anything that almost anyone could do with him.

Sean and Charly wrap it up while teasing a sequel. Post copyright notice, we see Sean going to a makeshift bed in the warehouse, complete with Ultimate Warrior Wrestling Buddy.

Overall Rating: A. Oh come on like I’m going to do anything but love this. This was all about changing things up and offering a bunch of stuff that you actually haven’t seen before, which is a lot better than seeing the same matches over and over again. They even make fun of that trope with the Shawn vs. Razor ladder match. It starts to run out of steam near the end but egads the amount of stuff they must have in that vault.

There better be a sequel to this as they could probably make half a dozen of these things without getting repetitive. That’s the beauty of having archives dating back nearly fifty years. They could easily do one of these for multiple eras and they would all be must buys. This was one of the most entertaining sets I’ve seen, just for the amount of times it made my eyebrows go up at what I was seeing. If you’re a fan of this time period, go out of your way to find this as it’s a straight blast.

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Royal Rumble 1997
Date: January 19, 1997
Location: Alamodome, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 60,235
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

I’m scared to think how many of those tickets were freebies. This is the annual requested redo and I’m not sure what to expect going into it. Well I am as I’ve seen the show multiple times but it’s been awhile. The main event is of course Shawn Michaels vs. Sid II because we need the big hometown moment. Those actually existed back in 1997. Let’s get to it.

As you might expect, the opening video is all about Shawn because it’s 1997. The title win at Wrestlemania was nice at all but his defining moment came at Survivor Series when he showed compassion for Jose Lothario instead of trying to retain the title. Well to be fair that would be defining as it meant Shawn actually lost a title match instead of vacating the title so maybe they’re on to something.

The announcers preview the show and Lawler is VERY excited about the main event.

Intercontinental Title: Goldust vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

This is one of my least favorite matches ever. Helmsley is defending against a freshly face Goldust. Basically everyone thought Goldust was gay but he confirmed that he wasn’t, which sent HHH after Marlena for some reason. Mr. Hughes makes his debut as HHH’s short lived bodyguard/butler which is code for bodyguard/Chyna is on the way.

Goldust jumps him in the aisle and hammers away in the corner until a quick atomic drop gets us to even. A catapult sends HHH outside as the crowd is really, really quiet here. I’m not sure if it’s the place being huge or the fans being bored but it’s not working so far. Goldust sends him into the steps, causing JR to suggest we might get a DQ. I mean, we probably won’t this early but points for doing your job.

They keep using the steps with HHH bouncing off them and now Lawler thinks it should be a DQ. Vince talks about some fans who had been trying to talk to Shawn for weeks being thrown out of the building. That’s one of those things that doesn’t really hold up over time as they just gloss over it and expect us to know what he’s talking about. It makes sense at the time but there are probably better things to talk about during a title match on pay per view.

HHH actually comes off the top with an ax handle but a running knee hits the barricade. As JR asks about a DQ again, Goldust starts in on the knee like a good challenger should. We hit a Figure Four as this is already dragging horribly. The knee goes into the steps again as the announcers are wondering why the referee is letting so much go. Back in and Goldust misses a crossbody (called a high risk by JR) to send him outside as HHH takes over again.

The referee FINALLY does something by taking away the director’s chair before HHH can swing it (Lawler: “Why didn’t you do something about those stairs earlier?”) and they head back in. The match is so boring that we actually cut over to an interview with a country singer in the audience. That’s getting up there on the all time boredom scale and the dead crowd seems to agree.

HHH misses the kneedrop and hurts his leg again in the process but he’s still able to roll away from a Macho Elbow. Hughes, likely as bored as the rest of us, throws in the title but HHH would rather kiss Marlena. That earns him a belt shot to the head, only to have Hughes pull HHH out at two. Of course that’s not a DQ so Goldust goes after Hughes, setting up the Pedigree for the pin to retain the title.

Rating: F+. Oh yeah this is still bad and still one of the worst matches I can ever remember to open the show. It’s too long, too boring and completely uninteresting. This really needed to have about seven minutes chopped off and far less using the steps. I dread this match every time I watch the show and that hasn’t changed a bit.

Bret Hart is used to being the marked man in a match so the Royal Rumble will be no different.

Mankind talks about the Rumble being a chance to hurt a lot of people that he doesn’t like as well as some that he does. It’s going to be a very nice day.

Faarooq vs. Ahmed Johnson

Faarooq injured Johnson back in 1996 and it’s finally time for the grudge match in a feud that felt like it went on for the better part of forever. There are at least ten members of the Nation of Domination here, including a few actors who exist for the sole purpose of making the group bigger. As you might expect, Ahmed erupts to start and beats Faarooq down in the corner before sending him into the post. Where’s the OUTRAGE from the announcers over this blatant breaking of the rules?

A shot to the kidneys slows Johnson down and Faarooq calls for a belt, earning himself a clothesline in the process though. The brawl heads outside for a bit with neither being able to keep control all that long as you would expect in a brawl like this. A chair to the back keeps Ahmed in trouble and Faarooq opts to just kick him in the kidneys for good measure.

It’s off to the very logical reverse chinlock but Faarooq does the very stupid posing, allowing an electric chair to put him down. Faarooq comes right back with a spinebuster though, which JR calls a physical catch instead of a fair catch. Uh, right Jim. Ahmed pops up again and hits one of his own, meaning it’s time for the Nation to come in for the lame DQ.

Rating: D. Still not great but WAY better than the first, at least partially because it’s half the length of the opener. Johnson vs. Faarooq needed to be some big wild brawl, or maybe Johnson finding some partners to help him fight off the team. Like say the Legion of Doom in Chicago in a street fight. But for some reason the feud just kept going after that, which is probably why this feud isn’t the most fondly remembered.

Post match the Nation bails for some reason, leaving Ahmed to Pearl River Plunge one of them through a table.

Terry Funk thinks he can win because we’re in Texas. Nah, just one of those per show dude. Besides, Goldust is from Austin and look at what he got. Or don’t look actually as it’s too horrible for words. Or reviews for that matter.

Faarooq says he’ll take care of Ahmed in the Rumble because Johnson is an “Uncle Tom”.

Vader vs. Undertaker

There’s not much of a story here save for some back and forth attacks. We get the big long Undertaker entrance and as usual it looks amazing in the big stadium. They slug it out to start with Undertaker doing the sit up off a clothesline. The standing splash gets the exact same reaction and Vader is looking a bit worried.

The fight heads outside with Undertaker getting the better of it but Vader drops him ribs first across the top rope to take over again. Undertaker gets in a slam followed by a legdrop, which JR says is like no one has ever done. I’m sure that’s certainly not meant as a jab at anyone in particular second cousin twice removed.

Old School is broken up which JR says means Vader had it well scouted. Or Vader was smart enough to do ANYTHING when Undertaker was off balance and distracted? And now, let’s go INTERVIEW A FAN WHO SAVED UP TO COME TO THE SHOW. Lawler rips on Pettengill for wasting our time like that (amen brother) while Vader was pounding Undertaker about the head and shoulders (the body parts, not the shampoo).

We hit the lame nerve hold for a bit until Undertaker suplexes his way to freedom, leaving both guys down. Vader is up first and goes to the middle rope, only to dive into a powerslam. That would be a lot more impressive if Ahmed hadn’t done the EXACT SAME THING, even from the same corner, to Faarooq in the previous match.

Vader’s powerbomb gets two but Old School drops him again….and here’s Paul Bearer. Undertaker gets in a chokeslam but makes the mistake of going after Paul. Vader tries for a save and avoids a dive off the steps, sending Undertaker ribs first into the barricade. Bearer adds an urn shot and it’s the Vader Bomb to put Undertaker away.

Rating: C-. I’m a fan of Undertaker slugging away at a monster so this was more entertaining than it probably should have been. Vader was in something close to a free fall after losing to Shawn at Summerslam so this was more of a comeback win than anything else. Undertaker vs. Bearer would continue for a very long time.

Vader leaves with Bearer and Undertaker beats up a referee.

Austin says he isn’t talking with anyone until he wins the Rumble.

British Bulldog is going to win because he’s bizarre. Yes, bizarre.

Hector Garza/Perro Aguayo/Canek vs. Jerry Estrada/Fuerza Guerrera/Heavy Metal

This is a AAA match because the company was willing to try ANYTHING to get people interested, including these guys that 99% of fans have never heard of before. I’ll do my best to have any idea who these people are and what’s going on here but bear with me. Estrada and Heavy Metal (who Vince things is Estrada) start things off do a technical sequence to start before it’s off to the ancient looking Aguayo vs. the very feathery looking Estrada.

The crowd is just GONE for this one as Canek’s middle rope crossbody gets on Guerrera. Fuerza misses a top rope crane kick Swanton (that’s an odd one) so Canek gets an easy two. Heavy Metal does a Tajiri handspring but stumbles through the elbow to drop Garza. Things speed up a bit but they still seem a few steps off to keep this from getting, you know, good.

We hit a stalemate and that means it’s time to shake hands and bring in Estrada and Canek. They start running the ropes but WAIT! Time for more tags. Metal avoids a Figure Four and we get down to a bit of a traditional tag formula with the focus on Metal’s leg. Guerrera tries to make a save but dropkicks Metal by mistake and everything breaks down. Garza gets in his corkscrew plancha and Aguayo’s top rope double stomp to the arm (meant to be ribs) finally ends Metal.

Rating: D. I’ll give them points for trying something different here but this didn’t work for me. The wrestling wasn’t great here and I really have no idea who these people are. It was a nice try at something new and when you’re in the depths that the company was in at this point it’s worth the shot but this was a big miss.

Attendance announcement.

Royal Rumble

Ninety second intervals here and it’s Crush in at #1 and Ahmed in at #2. JR says Ahmed has a minute and a half to do whatever he wants to Crush. So Crush is stuck with his arms behind his back and isn’t allowed to fight back? They fight to the mat and the clock messes up so it’s Fake Razor Ramon in at #3, earning one heck of a booing. Thankfully Ahmed gets rid of the clown in about ten seconds but Faarooq shows up in the aisle, meaning Ahmed eliminates himself to go after him.

Thankfully (I think?) Phineas Godwinn is in at #4 to give us something to watch. It’s as thrilling of a brawl as you can imagine as Vince keeps talking about the clock issues, which means there’s no clock to be seen. Austin is in at #5 to wake the crowd up a bit and a middle rope clothesline is enough to allow Phineas to get rid of Crush. A Stunner gets rid of Phineas and it’s Bart Gunn in at #6. That lasts all of twenty six seconds before Austin is all alone again.

Jake Roberts is in at #7 and throws the snake bag in for a bonus. The DDT is loaded up but a backdrop gets rid of Jake, who is replaced by British Bulldog at #8. This goes a bit better with Bulldog pounding Austin down until Pierroth (AAA guy) is in at #9. The luchador gets double teamed until Bulldog wises up and turns on Austin. Sultan, whose music sounds like Pierroth’s, is in at #10 as they’re flying through this so far.

Bulldog puts Austin on the apron but gets poked in the eye for his efforts. We’ve got a clock now and the fans are into it again, which is a really good sign for the match. Mil Mascaras is in at #11 and you know he’s going to get his stuff in. HHH is in at #12 as there’s really not much going on in between these entrances. Bulldog gets rid of Sultan to clear the ring out a bit though it doesn’t do much to keep the crowd going. The middle rope middle finger elbow hits HHH and Owen Hart is in at #13.

Without much going on, Owen “accidentally” eliminates Bulldog, who really isn’t happy with his partner as a result. Goldust is in at #14 and everyone gangs up on him for some reason. Cibernetico (also from AAA) is in at #15 and is tossed almost as quickly, along with Pierroth. Marc Mero is in at #16 as Mascaras dives on Cibernetico to eliminate himself in the process (which I’m sure was a COMPLETE mistake), followed by Goldust tossing HHH. That leaves us with Hart, Austin, Mero and Goldust who are joined by Latin Lover at #17.

Lover gets in some basic stuff before Faarooq comes in at #18 to eliminate him. Cue Ahmed again for a 2×4 shot to Faarooq to get rid of him as well. Austin dumps Mero and Hart, leaving himself alone in the ring. Savio Vega, Austin’s old rival, is in at #19 and scores with a spinwheel kick. That’s about it though as Austin clotheslines him out to be alone again. Jesse James is next and while he lasts a bit longer than Vega, it’s still not even a minute before Austin gets rid of him. Austin sits on the middle rope…..and it’s BRET HART at #21, giving Austin one of the best OH DANG looks in wrestling history.

The key to him though: he sees Bret coming, shakes his head, and tells Bret to bring it on before starting the slug out. Notice that: he didn’t back down and came out swinging because that’s how Austin rolled. It wouldn’t fit Austin to panic and try to beg or something. Man against man, Austin thought he could beat anyone on the planet no matter what circumstances he was up against. That’s good storytelling and a big part of what made him a star.

Lawler is in at #22 and starts the “it takes a king” line before leaving. Two right hands later and he’s back on the floor four seconds later to finish the catchphrase. Vince: “Do you know you were just in the ring?” JR mentions that Bret said he should just be the WWF Champion coming into the show, which is a great example of how his heel turn took off.

Fake Diesel (as played by the future Kane) is in at #23 and at least he looks close enough to pass for a Nash look-a-like. From behind or at a distance, you could actually make a mistake. Fake Razor on the other hand wasn’t even close and that’s why he was booed while Diesel is greeted with general indifference. A few power moves keep everyone down until it’s Terry Funk in at #24. It says a lot when Kane is by far and away the fourth most successful wrestler in a match.

Rocky Maivia is in at #25 to make Kane even less important and of course he goes right after Austin for the sake of future issues. The slow pace continues until Mankind is in at #26, giving us Mankind, Austin, Rocky, Funk, Diesel and Hart. If there has ever been a better collection of talent at one point in the Rumble, I’ve yet to see it. Just DANG what a lineup here.

Flash Funk is in at #27 and Lawler wants the Funkettes. Bret piledrives the heck out of Austin and Flash dives off the top to take out Diesel and Terry. Vader is in at #28 as I start to miss people wrestling earlier in the show and still being in the Royal Rumble. For some reason Flash makes the mistake of going after him, only to get pummeled down in a hurry. Henry Godwinn is in at #29 to bring the talent WAY down in a hurry.

The big Henry actually clotheslines Vader down as JR compares Lawler’s entrant to Bushwhacker Luke’s 1991 entrance. Oh come on. Lawler lasted TWICE as long as Luke. Undertaker completes the field at #30, giving us a final group of Undertaker, Austin, Hart, Terry Funk, Flash Funk, Diesel, Maivia, Vader, Godwinn and Mankind. Undertaker immediately punches Vader down before chokeslamming a few people.

The still unknown brothers have a bit of a fight as Vince calls Undertaker the favorite. Vader throws Flash out and we have Henry vs. Undertaker for a rather off brawl. Rocky almost has Bret out until Vader makes the save for no apparent reason. Austin and Funk chop each other half to death and probably have a blast doing so.

Undertaker throws Henry out and my jaw drops at the talent left in there. The final eight either already are or will be in the Hall of Fame one day. That’s INSANE and will likely never be even approached again. Mankind tosses Rocky and them pummels Terry before suplexing him out to the floor. Undertaker gets rid of Mankind, who is happy to brawl to the back with Funk. Bret dumps Austin for the pop of the night but the referees are busy breaking up the brawl, allowing Austin to come back in and eliminate Vader and Undertaker. Bret gets rid of Diesel, only to have Austin throw him out for the win in a great bit of cheating.

Rating: D+. And the good here is almost ALL Austin as the rest of the match was barely even worth talking about. There wasn’t much in the way of storytelling to be seen here as there wasn’t really a big winner teased until the very end. The lack of talent up until the end and time to go with the build towards the end didn’t do a lot of good as the match doesn’t even really start until Bret comes in two thirds of the way there. It’s certainly not the worst Rumble but it’s really not good either.

Bret has another tirade and while he has a point, he handles it like a baby.

We recap Shawn vs. Sid. Back at Survivor Series, Sid attacked Shawn’s manager with a camera to cost Shawn the title. Sid has been on a rampage since but now we’re in Shawn’s hometown for the big rematch.

Shawn says he’s sick with the flu (a-huh) but he’s ready to fight with 70,000 people (or closer to 50,000 depending on who you ask) behind him.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Sid

Sid is defending of course. Shawn stares him down to start and is quickly shoved across the ring without too much effort. A kick to the chest puts Sid on the floor but he comes right back in and grabs a camel clutch. That goes nowhere (other than around for a long time) so Sid tries a chinlock, followed by one heck of a clothesline.

Some hard whips across the ring set up a bearhug because Sid needs to keep things slow. The bearhug stays on so long that Sid actually LAYS DOWN ON THE MAT WITH IT. A legdrop gets two and it’s already back to the reverse chinlock. Thankfully this one doesn’t last as long and Shawn comes back with a slam. Really a slam? After all that back work?

The forearm into the flying elbow connects but Sid goes outside to yell at Jose and his son. We get a ref bump so the chokeslam only gets two as a second ref comes in. Sid knocks the second referee down so Shawn hits him with the camera for two. The superkick gives Shawn the title back.

Rating: D+. As I said in the original review, this could have been much worse. I mean, not much worse but it could have been worse. Shawn winning the title back was the most obvious thing in the world and it’s ok to have him win here, especially in his hometown. It’s not exactly a good match but then again Sid isn’t exactly a good opponent. What is nice is seeing a hometown guy win a big match for a change and the fact that it derailed Shawn’s heel turn is…..well actually it kind of sucks but he wouldn’t have the title long anyway.

A ridiculously long celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: D. Why is this show so fondly remembered? The wrestling is pretty lame (though there are worse options) and the Rumble itself isn’t much to be remembered outside of Austin starting his rise to the top of the promotion. It’s not the worst Royal Rumble of all time but I don’t remember getting into the show a single time all night, save for that look from Austin when Bret came out. Just not a very good show but it’s from a bad time for the company.

Ratings Comparison

HHH vs. Goldust

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2017 Redo: F+

Ahmed Johnson vs. Faarooq

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: D

Vader vs. Undertaker

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C-

Hector Garza/Perro Aguayo/El Canek vs. Jerry Estrada/Heavy Metal/Fuerza Guerrera

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D

Royal Rumble

Original: C+

2013 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: D+

Shawn Michaels vs. Sycho Sid

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C+

2017 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D

Now that’s more like it. The two main events just aren’t that good but I have NO idea what I was thinking on the opener. That match is a disaster and I can’t stand it less and less every time I see it.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/17/royal-rumble-count-up-1997-bret-hart-uh-make-that-austin/

And the 2013 redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/11/royal-rumble-count-up-2013-redo-1997-why-austin-was-a-near-perfect-character/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 1996
Date: January 21, 1996
Location: Selland Arena, Fresno, California
Attendance: 9,600
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect

We’re in the Monday Night Wars era now and it’s all about Shawn at the moment. He’s back from injury and in the Rumble tonight, looking to become the second person ever to win back to back Rumbles. Other than that we’ve got Bret vs. Undertaker which is another of those matches that can be hit or miss. It’s hard to say what we’ll get here….well not really because I’ve seen this show a bunch of times. Let’s get to it.

We open with Sunny in a bathtub, saying this show is graphic and view discretion is advised.

The opening video is about how the champion is defined by Hart, as in Bret Hart. Tonight though he’s against a force who has no heart, in the form of Undertaker. The IC Title match (Ramon vs. Goldust) and the Rumble are talked about as well.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Ahmed Johnson

Last month at IYH, Jarrett hit Johnson with a gold record to set this up. Johnson is basically Ezekiel Jackson with a bit of skill and charisma. Jarrett immediately bails to the floor to hide. Back in he tries a hiptoss and Ahmed is like boy are you stupid or something? A headlock is easily countered by a throw from Johnson and a clothesline takes Jarrett down. There’s a World’s Strongest Slam for two for Ahmed and things slow down again. Johnson misses a clothesline by a mile but Jeff sells it anyway of course.

A cross body misses as well but this time Johnson goes flying over the top, getting his hand caught in the ropes on the way down. A HARD whip into the steps puts Johnson down and we head back in. Ahmed starts no selling stuff and catches a dive in a bearhug. That goes nowhere so Johnson sends him to the floor and hits a big dive. Back in and Ahmed misses a FREAKING SWANTON (remember that he weighs like 280) and there’s the Figure Four from Jarrett. Johnson powers out of it twice, so Jarrett cracks him with the guitar off the top for the LAME DQ.

Rating: C-. I was always an Ahmed fan so this was an easy pass for me. The image of the Swanton looked great if nothing else, which is more than enough to give this a pass. Jarrett was such a mess at this point and never went anywhere in the WWF. The ending completely sucked though and it really brought things down.

BUY OUR STUFF!

Diesel isn’t worried about the Rumble tonight and doesn’t think it’s Vader Time. He doesn’t care who he faces at Mania, but he isn’t happy with Taker being the #1 contender.

Tag Titles: Smoking Gunns vs. Bodydonnas

The Bodydonnas are Skip (Chris Candido) and Zip (Tom Prichard with a BIG haircut). They have Sunny with them and my goodness is she smoking (no pun intended) here. The Guns are defending. Skip and Billy start things off with Skip taking over with a headscissors. Just like Ahmed earlier, Billy misses a charge against the ropes and crashes to the outside. Both Gunns get double teamed until Bart ducks out of the way, allowing a charging Billy to dive onto both Donnas on the floor.

Things settle down a bit and it’s back to Billy vs. Skip with the champion in control. Sunny hits on Bart until it’s Bart vs. Zip. A gorilla press puts Zip down but he makes a blind tag, allowing Skip to take over. The champions are fine with the double teaming stuff too, and take over on Skip very easily. Sunny gets on the apron and is knocked off just as quickly, giving us a nice upskirt shot in the process.

Now we get to the important part of the match as Billy goes to check on Sunny, allowing the Donnas to pound away on Bart. Skip hits a nice plancha onto Billy before suplexing Zip onto Billy for two back inside. Billy gets to play Ricky Morton for awhile, being put in a chinlock by Zip. This goes on for awhile until we get a sloppy spot where the Donnas collide and Skip rams heads will Billy. This would work a bit better if Billy wasn’t about eight inches taller than Candido.

Hot tag brings in Bart and everything breaks down with the champions taking over. The Sidewinder (side slam/guillotine legdrop combo) crushes Zip but Sunny’s distraction lets Skip break things up and take Zip’s place. Ignore the fact that one has the straps of his singlet up and the other doesn’t, and the fact that they look as different as Demolition did. In an ending the Expresses used back in the 80s, the Donnas load up a double suplex on Bart, but Billy spears Skip down, causing Bart to fall on Zip for the pin to retain.

Rating: C-. Tag wrestling at this time was really weak with very few solid teams anywhere to be found. The Gunns were ok at best and the Donnas were only popular because of Sunny. Billy would turn heel relatively soon and would eventually join up with Road Dogg to form the New Age Outlaws and turn the division completely upside down. Nothing much to see here but it certainly wasn’t terrible.

We get some of the Billionaire Ted skits, which were unfunny shots at Ted Turner. Not his wrestling company directly, but Turner himself. I’m still not sure why they decided to do these but no one liked them and they came off as mean instead of funny or witty. Note Vince Russo as one of the executives in the board room skit.

We recap Razor vs. Goldust, where Goldust is hitting on Razor to mess with his mind before the match tonight. To say Goldust’s character got them in hot water around this point is a huge understatement.

Intercontinental Title: Razor Ramon vs. Goldust

The yet to be named Marlena debuts with Goldie here. Razor is defending as is his custom. Feeling out process to start with Goldust playing his usual mind games, which means rubbing himself. Razor cranks on the arm before grabbing a headlock which goes nowhere. Goldust goes behind Razor and molests him a bit to psych Razor out even more. They head to the corner with Razor having his head rubbed a bit, ticking him off even more.

Razor goes for the arm so Goldust slaps him in the face. Perfect keeps making sex jokes as Razor slaps Goldust right back in the face. He spanks Goldie once as well, but the painted dude likes it. We head to the floor where Goldust hides behind Marlena as the stalling continues. Back in and Razor tries three straight headscissors before punching Goldust to the floor with a single shot.

We get more stalling which is called playing mind games before Ramon clotheslines him right back to the outside. Razor has to move Marlena out of the way, allowing Goldust to FINALLY do something, taking over with a shot to the ribs. Back in and Goldust focuses on the ribs, but not too much because that might mean we have some speed to this match. A bulldog gets two for Goldust as does a slingshot belly to back suplex.

Off to a sleeper, which Perfect suggests Goldust could use to do “whatever he wants” to Goldust. Much like everything else in the match, this goes on way too long until Razor fights up and kicks Goldust low. He’s so spent though that Goldie gets a two count, causing Razor to start his comeback. He fires off his usual punches and the chokeslam gets two. A belly to back superplex hit but Marlent distracts the referee, allowing the 1-2-3 Kid to come in and kick Razor’s head off. Goldust gets the easy pin and the title.

Rating: D-. Sweet freaking goodness this was dull. It went on WAY too long and had a bad ending on top of that, plus the stupid “psychology” from Goldust which wound up being more unpleasant than interesting or intelligent. Goldust would get WAY better when he became more of a comedy/parody character rather than this freaky dude that he was to start his WWF run. The matches got a lot better as a result too.

Wrestlemania 12 is coming.

We get the usual promos for the Rumble, but we start with a statement from Shawn’s doctor who says he’s back and healthy. Thankfully this is kept VERY short and he’s not dull. We hear from Owen, Roberts, Lawler, Horowitz, Vader and Shawn. Shawn would be the most obvious winner ever in the Rumble since…..well since last year when he was the absolutely obvious pick to win.

Vince and Perfect talk about the Rumble a bit.

Royal Rumble

HHH is #1, having lost a match on the Free for All to Duke Droese, who won the right to be #30. Henry Godwinn is #2 and I believe he’s feuding with HHH at this point. Helmsley pounds away in the corner to start but gets backdropped down very quickly. The intervals are back to two minutes this year thank goodness. Trips pokes him in the eye and chokes away until Bob Backlund is #3. Backlund saves HHH before pounding away on him. These wide shots are showing how nearly empty the upper deck is.

Jerry Lawler is #4 as HHH hits the jumping knee to the face of Godwinn. The fans chant Burger King and you know Lawler isn’t going to pass up a chance to rile up a crowd. He goes to get the slop bucket that Godwinn brought with him, but Henry clears the ring and gets the bucket, throwing it over the top onto Lawler and some of Backlund. Bob Holly is #5 and things slow down a bit until HHH erupts on Godwinn for some reason.

We get some slow paced elimination teases until Mabel is #6. Still nothing happens so here’s Jake Roberts at #7 to an ERUPTION. No one is eliminated yet. Jake throws in the snake and everyone but Lawler can get to the floor. After nearly giving him a heart attack with the snake, Lawler disappears for a good while as he hides under the ring. Mabel gets tied up in the ropes and pounded on for a bit until Dory Funk Jr. is #8.

The DDT is countered by HHH as we hear about a friendship between Terry Funk and Bruce Willis of all people. Backlund and Funk go at it because they’re both old and I doubt Dory knows most of the other people in the ring. Lawler is seen hiding under the ring. Yokozuna is #9 as there are WAY too many people in the match at the moment. Backlund puts Dory in the chickenwing and is eliminated by Yoko for a prize. Yoko crushes Godwinn in the corner but Mabel splashes Yoko, killing Henry in the process.

The 1-2-3 Kid is #10 but Razor charges down the aisle to chase him away (not eliminated). Officials get Razor off the Kid but it takes Mabel beating Razor down to stop the chases. It amazes me that Razor wasn’t in more Rumbles. Come to think of it….he was NEVER in a Rumble. Omori, a Japanese star that doesn’t mean much yet, is #11. At the moment we’ve got HHH, Godwinn, Lawler (under the ring), Holly, Mabel, Roberts, Funk, Yoko, the Kid and Omori in the match.

Wait where is Godwinn? I guess he went out off camera. Yoko and Mabel double team Omori until Jake pounds away on Yoko to the loudest reactions of the match so far. Funk hits a double underhook suplex on the Kid as Savio Vega is #12. He spinwheel kicks Mabel down, allowing Yoko to dump the reigning King (Mabel if you’re lucky enough to not remember that gimmick). Omori goes out thanks to Roberts and things slow down again.

Vader debuts at #13 and lumbers around while not doing much. He picks Bob Holly of all people to beat on first as Vega eliminates Dory. Vader pulls Savio back in from the apron for no apparent reason other than he wants to beat on him some more. Doug Gilbert from Memphis is #14 and HHH goes right after him for no apparent reason. Vader and Yoko slug it out to a big reaction but Vader has to stop to clothesline Roberts out.

The camera work in this is really bad as they keep looking at corners of the ring instead of the full thing, making us miss a lot of stuff. Savio pounds on Vader until one of the Squat Team members (BIG fat guys who are there because they’re fat and look alike) is #15. Vader sloppily throws Gilbert out and does the same to the Squat Team dude. Yoko and Vader slug it out again and people respond again.

The other member of the Squat Team is #16 but they both get in to double team Vader. The Mastodon (Vader) punches their faces in as only Vader can do before knocking them both to the floor. Owen Hart is #17 and everyone but Yoko is on one side of the ring for some reason. Vader and Yoko double team Savio who doesn’t seem interested in selling at all. A pair of splashes in the corner crushes him, as do a regular splash and the big leg from Yoko.

Shawn is #17 to a decent pop but significantly smaller than Jake’s. Vader throws out Savio as Shawn goes after HHH and the Kid. Vader and Yoko slug it out a bit before slugging it out a lot. They fight against the ropes, so Shawn gets a running start and dumps them BOTH AT ONCE. Now THAT wakes up the crowd. If that’s not enough, Shawn gorilla presses (!) the Kid to the floor as the ring is suddenly very thin. Hakushi is #19 as the big guys fight on the floor.

Scratch the floor part as Vader gets back in and cleans house, but none of the eliminations count because he’s not legal. Once he’s finally taken away, we’ve got Shawn, HHH, Holly, Hart, Hakushi and Lawler underneath the ring. Tatanka is #20 as Shawn thrown Jim Cornette, Vader’s manager, out. Hakushi hits a Muta elbow on Hart in the corner as HHH of course goes after Shawn.

Michaels teases a bunch of eliminations to try to make us think he’s not winning. Owen dumps Hakushi as Aldo Montoya (Justin Credible with a jock strap over his face) is #21. Shawn gets sent through the ropes to the floor, where he pulls Lawler out and sends him back into the ring. Tatanka puts out Montoya as Shawn puts out Lawler.

Here’s Diesel at #22 and house is cleaned. There goes Tatanka at the hands of the tall one and it’s time for Shawn vs. Diesel which gets a pop but is too short to mean much. Kama (Godfather) is #23 as this continues to go slowly. Shawn pounds on Holly (why is he still in this?) in the corner as Kama and Diesel slug it out. The Ringmaster (Steve Austin who is brand new here) is #24. He’s in white boots which is a really strange thing to see for him.

Shawn does his usual overblown self safe as Holly and Austin fight. FINALLY Holly goes out after nearly forty minutes. HHH vs. Austin happens about three years before it would mean anything. Barry Horowitz (with the AWESOME rock version of Hava Nagila) is #25 and he goes after Diesel. Well no one ever accused him of being brilliant. Shawn nips up to knock Owen to the apron, but Hart skins the cat back in. Cool little sequence there.

HHH punches Diesel, so Diesel grabs him by the head and LAUNCHES him to the floor. The Game made it about 48 minutes which isn’t bad at all. MAKING A DIFFERENCE Fatu (don’t ask. PLEASE don’t ask) is #26 and he doesn’t do much. Shawn and Owen can’t suplex the other one out so here’s Isaac Yankem DDS (Kane) at #27. The ring is WAY too full but Barry is put out to thin it out a bit.

Owen hits the enziguri on Shawn which put Michaels on the shelf leading up to this match. Shawn hangs on AGAIN though and puts Owen out while we’re looking at a double feature. Austin kills Shawn with a clothesline and here’s Marty Jannetty at #28. Fatu superkicks Kane as the burst of energy from Marty is already gone. Shawn and Jannetty go at it because they’re former partners. Perfect: “They’re rocking now aren’t they?” They punch each other down and the British Bulldog is #29.

Smith goes right for Shawn because of what happened last year. I love little bits of continuity like that which you never get anymore. Davey puts out Marty as Fatu GOES OFF on Austin before clotheslining him out off camera. Yankem puts out Fatu and here’s Duke Droese at #30. The final group is Shawn, Droese, Diesel, Smith, Yankem and Kama.

Smith and Michaels fight to the floor and Owen jumps Shawn for good measure. Shawn shrugs it off and goes in to dropkick Yankem out. Kama and Diesel put out Droese to get us down to four. Shawn clotheslines Smith out before skinning the cat back in. Diesel dumps Kama and Shawn superkicks the tall one (in the shoulder) out to win for the second year in a row.

Rating: D. Oh this was DULL. The problem here was that like last year (although to a MUCH weaker degree), there were very few guys you could buy as a winner here. It’s FAR better than last year’s match but the crowd was dead for long stretches of this, mainly due to boredom. You could see the star power of the future, but that’s the problem: they weren’t stars yet and no one bought them at this point. The match isn’t bad, but it’s definitely not good if that makes sense.

Diesel is ticked off about the ending and goes back in as Shawn is stripping. They do their old Wolfpack thing in the middle of the ring (a high five where Shawn has to jump) and all is cool. Shawn poses for a long time post match.

Oh yeah we’ve got a thirty minute match left to go.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Bret Hart

Bret is defending and Taker is still in his skull mask period. Diesel is still straggling behind and stares at Taker during his entrance. They brawl with neither guy getting much of an advantage. Since this is WWF, we recap what we just say two minutes ago. After all that, here’s the world champion. Taker stands in the middle of the ring and Bret circles him for a bit. Hart pounds away in the corner and Taker stares at him.

Taker LAUNCHES him into the corner which is one of my favorite of his moves. He chokes Bret in the air and moves very slowly. Off to a smother hold which goes on for a LONG time. Bret finally makes the rope so there’s Old School….which sets up the smother again. Bret fights up and hits a middle rope clothesline followed by a regular one to send Taker to the floor. There’s a dive to take out the challenger as this finally picks up the pace a bit.

Bret tries to dive off the apron at Taker but is pulled out of the air and rammed into the post. Taker rams him into various other things until Bret reverses a whip into the steps, trying to damage Taker’s knees. Back in and Bret works over the knee as this is going nowhere. The Figure Four goes on….and on…..and on……and Taker turns it over.

Bret gets to the rope, so let’s put on ANOTHER LEG HOLD! It’s that always riveting one where Bret drops an elbow on the leg and just lays on it. This is also known as the Dusty Rhodes Special. He does however mix it up by trying to take off Taker’s mask. After being in this for literally about three minutes, Taker smashes his free leg on Bret’s head before we head back to the floor. Taker chokes away with a cord and sends Bret into the barricade as we head back in.

The champ goes back to the freaking knee as the fans loudly boo Bret. Taker’s leg is wrapped around the post a few times and it’s back to laying on the leg. Dear goodness get this over with already. We’re over twenty minutes into this and NOTHING has happened. To save my sanity the hold doesn’t last as long this time and Taker fights back. There are some legdrops and a clothesline as Taker’s knee seems fine. He loads up the Tombstone but Bret slides down his back and guillotines Taker on the ropes.

A DDT puts Taker down and Bret starts headbutting the back. We get the Russian legsweep but Taker sits up. The bulldog takes Taker down and there’s the middle rope elbow. Bret gives the fans a thumbs down and loads up the Sharpshooter. Taker grabs him by the throat to block it but Bret knees him in the ribs. A double clothesline puts both guys down and we lay around a bit more.

Bret is up first and takes off the buckle from a corner. He goes for the mask again and gets it off to reveal….the same Undertaker we’ve seen for like five years at this point. Seriously he looks fine. Taker fights back but gets rammed into the exposed buckle. That gets no sold and it’s a Tombstone for Bret. Since this is such a dull match though, Diesel pulls the referee out at two for a DQ.

Rating: D+. This started VERY slow but got better for the last ten minutes or so, but the ending brings it right back down again. If this had been a fifteen minute match or so it would have been WAY better, but they only had so many other matches on the card, meaning this had to be longer. Diesel would face Taker at Mania of course.

Gorilla Monsoon makes Diesel vs. Bret for the title at the next PPV.

Shawn says the 90s will be his time.

Taker comes in to yell at Gorilla, saying that Diesel won’t be champion on his watch. Gorilla makes it a cage match so Taker can’t interfere.

Diesel goes on a big rant about how he’s not afraid of the dark and says he’s going to have his hands in everything from now on because the WWF is running on Diesel Power. This was his official heel turn.

Cornette says Vader cannot be ignored. He pretty much was until Summerslam.

Overall Rating: D. This is a really weird show to grade because while most of the matches got bad grades, it’s not that bad of a show overall. Don’t get me wrong: it’s bad, but it’s really not as bad as it sounds. The first two matches are certainly watchable, but they’re not that good. The Rumble is also passable, but it’s dull at times. Not horrible, but definitely not worth seeing.

Ratings Comparison

Ahmed Johnson vs. Jeff Jarrett

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Smoking Gunns vs. Bodydonnas

Original: D

Redo: C-

Goldust vs. Razor Ramon

Original: D

Redo: D-

Royal Rumble

Original: D

Redo: D

Bret Hart vs. Undertaker

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D-

Redo: D

Amazingly enough I liked it a bit better this time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/15/royal-rumble-count-up-1996-shawns-texas-two-step/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 1995
Date: January 22, 1995
Location: USF Sun Dome, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

Oh dang it 1995 WWF still exists. This is that year that no one likes to talk about and you have to fly through it as fast as you can or you might risk seeing something on it. The big twist this year is that the intervals in the Rumble are only 60 seconds, so the whole match is like 40 minutes long. The other problem is that Diesel is WWF Champion here. The good news is that he’s facing Bret Hart, one of the two men capable of dragging an awesome match out of him. Let’s get to it.

We open with the big deal about tonight’s show: Pamela Anderson arrives. She’ll be escorting the winner of the Rumble to the ring at Wrestlemania. A bunch of guys arrive to greet her.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Razor Ramon

Jarrett is challenging and now has the Roadie with him. Razor starts with his usual assortment of punches and a fallaway slam to send Jeff to the floor. After a little toweling off on the floor, Jeff armdrags Razor down and struts. They trade arm holds until Razor gets taken to the mat where Jeff messes with his hair. Careful with the grease there Jeff. Razor gets annoyed and knocks Jeff to the floor for some more Memphis stalling.

Jeff gets back in and is immediately puts in an armbar where Razor can mess with Jarrett’s hair. Some dropkicks floor the champ and a clothesline gets two. Razor catches a boot coming and ducks the enziguri from Jeff, but Razor misses an elbow to keep Jarrett in control. We hit the chinlock followed by a sunset flip by Jeff for two. Another dropkick gets the same and Jarrett is getting frustrated.

Jarrett hooks a sleeper but Razor quickly counters. The counter doesn’t last long though as Jeff hits a swinging neckbreaker for two. Ramon slides behind Jeff in the corner and crotches him on the post to a big pop. We get a messed up (not botched mind you) spot where Razor was going to try a bulldog off the middle rope but Jeff turns around and it had to be a clothesline. Eh no harm no foul. Jeff backdrops Razor to the floor, injuring the champ’s knee. Roadie clips him in the knee and Razor gets counted out.

We won’t get to the rating just yet. Post match Jeff calls Razor a coward for taking the easy way out like that and calls him back into the ring. Razor pulls a Marty McFly and takes the bait, giving us another match.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Razor Ramon

Razor tries some quick rollups for two but Jeff goes right for the knee to take over. Jeff does his best Ric Flair imitation but as he goes for the third cannonball down onto the leg, Razor kicks him over the top and out to the floor. Back in and Jarrett puts on the Figure Four, putting Razor in a lot of trouble. Razor escapes and starts his comeback with punches and the belly to back superplex but Jeff counters in mid air for two. Razor clotheslines him down and loads up the Edge, but the knee gives out and Jeff rolls him up for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. I always remember liking this match and it holds up pretty well. Memphis stalling isn’t for everyone but it’s a good way of drawing heel heat, which Jeff might as well have been an iceberg for otherwise. Razor was awesome at this point and had good chemistry with Jeff, so this worked pretty well all around. The ending was smart as it was Razor’s trademark ending for house shows, but he would usually win in about 30 seconds with the Razor’s Edge. Nice to see them switch things up here.

Pamela Anderson has been given a lot of gifts from various wrestlers. One of the running gags on this show is that Pamela clearly doesn’t want to be here at all and has these “GET ME OUT OF HERE” looks on her face the whole night. Todd Pettingill tries to hit on her and completely fails of course.

Jeff says it’s time to celebrate.

IRS vs. The Undertaker

This is the start of the Undertaker vs. Million Dollar Team feud which went on FOREVER. The bell rings and we stand around a lot. IRS tries to jump Taker from behind and it goes nowhere. Taker glares him down to the floor and the stalling continues. IRS slides in, gets glared down, and hides on the floor again. Finally we head back in with IRS pounding away and getting kicked in the face for his efforts.

Taker grabs him by the tie and swings him out of the corner, followed by Old School as this is dominance so far. IRS and DiBiase get in an argument on the floor, causing DiBiase to call for some druids. Taker loads up Old School again but the druid shakes the rope and Taker goes down. A clothesline puts Taker on the floor where he beats on the druids a bit before IRS jumps him from behind.

The druids send Taker into the steps and there’s an abdominal stretch by IRS. That goes nowhere so Taker misses an elbow to really slow himself down. IRS hits some basic stuff as the crowd is almost completely silent. Druid interference gets two for IRS and also allows him to escape the Tombstone. A clothesline puts Taker down but he pops up and hits a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. At the end of the day, this was about thirteen minutes of Taker beating up IRS. I mean….did ANYONE buy IRS as a threat to the Dead Man here? That was the problem with the eight month long feud between Taker and DiBiase’s group: no one on the team was a real threat to him at all. Bad match here but that had to be expected.

Post match Taker beats up the druids and has a staredown with King Kong Bundy. During the staring, IRS steals the Urn. There’s the launch of the feud and Bundy beats up Taker for awhile.

Diesel doesn’t have much to say about his match with Bret.

Bret is ready for his chance at the title.

WWF World Title: Diesel vs. Bret Hart

Diesel is defending in case you’re really slow. Bret tries to brawl to start but is almost immediately knocked down by a big shot to the face. A clothesline puts Bret on the floor where he chills for a bit. Back in and Bret goes after the knee like a smart Hitman. He puts on a quick Figure Four and after a good deal of time in it, Diesel gets to the rope. Bret does something you hardly ever see enough: he puts the same hold back on. Why don’t more people do that? He had Diesel in trouble, so why mess with what was working?

Diesel makes the rope again and heads to the floor where Bret hits a suicide dive to have the champ reeling. Diesel shrugs it off and sends Hart into the steps to get a breather. With Bret in the ropes, Diesel hits the running crotch attack to his back. There’s a backbreaker to Bret and Diesel bends him across the knee a bit. Bret fires off some right hands but gets whipped hard into the buckle to stop him cold.

The champ loads up the Jackknife but instead puts Bret on his shoulder for a backbreaker. Why he doesn’t JACKKNIFE HIM WHEN HE HAS THE CHANCE is beyond my intelligence as Bret escapes. A big boot (Diesel’s leg seems fine) puts Bret down for two, but Bret gets a boot up of his own, followed by a middle rope clothesline for two. Hart goes up and Diesel tries to slam him off, but the knee goes out, giving Bret a two count.

The kickout sends Bret to the floor and he pulls Diesel’s legs out for the figure four around the post. Actually scratch that as he ties Diesel’s legs together instead and pounds away. The Five Moves of Doom get two but Diesel grabs a rope to block the Sharpshooter. Bret clotheslines him to the floor but a dive is caught in mid-air. The tall guy rams him into the post and hits the Jackknife in the ring, but Shawn Michaels runs in to break up the count.

Shawn beats on Diesel’s leg which isn’t a DQ for no apparent reason. Shawn and Diesel had split up at Survivor Series if you’re wondering why this beating is happening. We get a ruling that the match must continue to the delight (yes I said delight) of the crowd. Bret goes back to the knee, hooking another Figure Four. Diesel can’t get to the ropes so he hits Bret in the bad ribs to escape. Ah selling, how I love you.

Diesel is all ticked off now and pounds away on Bret in the corner. A gutwrench suplex of all things gets two for the champ but a big boot in the corner misses. Bret wraps Diesel’s leg around the post and blasts it with a chair. There’s the Sharpshooter but now it’s Owen coming in for the save and a beatdown on Bret. I would say there’s a great tag match in there, but Bret and Shawn teaming up would mean the end of the world as we know it.

The match is going to continue AGAIN though and Diesel gets two on Bret. The place is starting to lose its minds over these near falls. Bret sends him into the buckle that Owen exposed and pounds away as Diesel is rocking again. Diesel comes back AGAIN with elbows and forearms to the face before punching Bret into the ropes where Hart’s legs are caught. Bret is holding his knee but you never know with him.

Yep, he stands up and lays back down in some classic Hart goldbricking. Diesel goes for the Jackknife but Bret fakes him into a small package for two. Bret tries an O’Connor Roll and the referee is bumped. Backlund, Michaels, Roadie and Jarrett run in and that’s FINALLY enough for the double DQ.

Rating: A. These two had MAD chemistry together and this was no exception. They knew how to work the David vs. Goliath (I’m not sure how fair it is to call Bret David actually) formula to perfection and the matches were great as a result. Why the company kept going with Diesel vs. power guys is beyond me, because his best stuff comes against small guys like Bret and Shawn and always has.

Backlund stays in the ring and puts the Crossface Chicken Wing on Bret. This set up their I Quit match at Mania which even Bret admits sucked. Diesel makes the save and hugs Bret.

More Pettingill and Anderson stuff.

Bob Holly and 1-2-3 Kid are excited to be in the finals of the tag team title tournament.

Tag Titles: Bob Holly/1-2-3 Kid vs. Bam Bam Bigelow/Tatanka

Shawn and Diesel split up and we needed champions. Holly and Tatanka start things off with Tatanka hitting a side slam for two. Holly comes back with a slam and a few dropkicks as this is going nowhere so far. Off to the Kid vs. Bigelow, with the big man running over both of the smaller guys with ease. Bigelow LAUNCHES Kid into the air but gets caught in a rana to send Bam Bam rolling.

Back to Tatanka who whips Kid into the buckles a few times before it’s off to Bigelow to pound on the small guy some more. In something that actually impressed me, Kid backdrops Bigelow to the floor. Both small guys try top rope cross bodies but they escape and dropkick the heels together. Things settle down with Tatanka beating on Holly for a LONG time. Bigelow comes in, allowing Tatanka to distract the Kid. Holly goes to the corner to find no partner and Bigelow splashes Bob.

Holly gets beaten down so badly that he goes to the wrong corner and tags in Tatanka. Thank goodness this isn’t the Attitude Era because it probably would have been legal in some of their matches. Tatanka comes in for more beating on Holly until Bob FINALLY gets in a clothesline for the hot tag to the Kid. Everything breaks down and Kid is LAUNCHED to the floor by Bigelow. Bam Bam loads up the moonsault but Tatanka accidentally hits the ropes to knock him to the mat. Somehow that’s enough for the pin and the titles for the Kid.

Rating: C+. This went nearly sixteen minutes which was just too long. It’s quite good but it would have been great if they cut off five minutes or so. Those launches by Bigelow were awesome looking as Kid continues to be an excellent seller of moves like those. The idea was that it was all Bigelow’s fault, even though Tatanka is totally to blame for Bigelow crashing like that. The Gunns would win the titles back the next night on Raw, making this whole thing pretty pointless.

Post match DiBiase and Tatanka leave Bigelow in the ring, where Lawrence Taylor, NFL legend, laughs at him. Bigelow shoves him down, and there’s Wrestlemania people.

We get a recap of the 94 Rumble, focusing on Diesel’s dominance and Shawn helping to eliminate him.

Shawn laughs a bit.

We look at the ending to the match from last year.

Luger says he wants the title. Lex, it’s been over for you for like eight months now. Let it go dude.

Vince apologizes to Lawrence Taylor.

Here’s Pamela Anderson to watch the Rumble at ringside and MAN does she look miserable.

Royal Rumble

Shawn is #1 and Bulldog is #2. Shawn immediately jumps Bulldog but this isn’t going to last long. Remember there are one minute intervals, which was just a bad idea in general. Smith gets a quick gorilla press, but why throw Shawn OUT when you can just slam him? That clearly won’t come back to haunt him later or anything of course. Smith charges into a boot and here’s Eli Blu (one of the Harris Brothers, who were the big bald bikers who were around for WAY too long) at #3.

Nothing happens so here’s Duke Droese (a wrestling garbageman) at #4. Eli fights Smith and Droese squeezes Shawn until Jimmy Del Ray of the Heavenly Bodies is #5. Nothing continues to happen because there isn’t enough time between entries. Sione (Barbarian) of the Headshrinkers is #6 as Del Ray is tossed out. Tom Prichard of the Heavyenly Bodies is #7 and STILL nothing is happening.

Doink is #8 as the Rumble is going way too fast. It’s like the original Rumble: not enough names to care about and nothing going on at the same time. Kwang is #9 and Rick Martel is #10, I believe in his last WWF match. There are nine people in the ring right now. Shawn is almost out but fights off Kwang to survive. Owen Hart is in at #11 and here’s Bret to jump him in the aisle. Owen survives and climbs in, only to be eliminated in three seconds.

Shawn puts out Droese and Timothy Well (partners with Steven Dunn in the tag team of Well Dunn) is #12 and is out almost immediately. Martel and Prichard go out faster than I can see them and Kwang superkicks Doink out. Luke of the Bushwhackers is #13 and during his entrance, everyone but Bulldog and Shawn are gone. Literally, four people were put out inside of six seconds. Luke is out almost immediately and it’s Shawn vs. Bulldog again.

Here’s Jacob Blu at #14 and HE TOO is gone in like fifteen seconds. This is so stupid. King Kong Bundy is #15 and he beats on both guys for about twenty seconds before it’s Mo at #16. Mo is like the fifth guy to last less than thirty seconds. If your roster is this weak, CUT THE FREAKING MATCH DOWN. Nothing else happens until Mable is #17 for the showdown with Bundy. Mabel dumps him out as Butch is #18 and is gone in less than 20 seconds as well. More on this later.

Lex Luger is #19 and he goes right for Mabel for no apparent reason. He eliminates the fat purple and gold dude before gorilla pressing Michaels down like an idiot. Mantaur, a stupid monster character, is #20. He beats on Luger and Bulldog until Aldo Montoya (Justin Credible with a jockstrap on his face) is #21. Henry Godwinn is #22 as we’re waiting on a bunch of people to get thrown out so everyone can go home. I think this is one of Henry’s first matches.

Billy Gunn is #23 so naturally Bart Gunn is #24. Bob Backlund is #25 and also lasts about fifteen seconds due to a Bret Hart attack. Steven Dunn is #26 as there are like ten people in there. Bret and Backlund fight in the aisle again and old man Dick Murdoch is #27. Mantaur misses a charge at Bart and Adam Bomb is #28. For the second year in a row, Vince decides Adam Bomb is going to win the Rumble. Seriously.

Fatu is #29 and Luger eliminates Mantaur. Crush is #30, giving us a final group of Shawn, Bulldog, Luger, Montoya, Godwinn, Bart, Billy, Dunn, Murdoch, Bomb, Fatu and Crush, or WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE. Thankfully Crush immediately eliminates the Gunns to clear the ring out a bit. We cut to Anderson who gives a very uninterested wave and points to the ring. You know, because this is SO beneath her. Well, not beneath her enough to give the check back or anything but you get the idea.

Dunn is put out off camera and Murdoch almost puts Shawn out. Luger makes the save due to a lack of intelligence as Murdoch tries headbutts on Fatu. Naturally it doesn’t work at all because YOU DON’T HEADBUTT A SAMOAN. Bomb is backdropped out and Shawn throwsn Montoya out. Luger saves Shawn AGAIN and Crush eliminates Fatu. There are six guys left: Murdoch (who hits a dropkick and airplane spin on Godwinn), Godwinn, Shawn, Bulldog, Crush and Luger.

Murdoch gets dizzy from the spin and falls out to get us down to five. Lex dumps Godwinn and we’ve got four left. Michaels and Crush double team Luger as Bulldog gets a breather. They dump Lex and we’ve got three guys left. Smith gets double teamed until Shawn turns on Crush and is lifted into the air. Bulldog uses the distraction to eliminate Crush and it’s one on one. Davey destroys Shawn and presses him onto (not over. That would make sense) the top rope. Shawn is knocked over the top, but in the famous finish, he hangs on and ONLY ONE FOOT touches, allowing Shawn to come back in and eliminate Smith to win.

Rating: D. This is a hard one to grade, because the stuff that was decent was in fact decent. The problem is there wasn’t much stuff that falls into that category. First and foremost, SEVEN PEOPLE OUT OF THIRTY did not last thirty seconds. If they’re that meaningless to the match, simply do not put them in the Rumble. It looks stupid and there’s no reason to have them out there.

Second, the time intervals. These were a major issues because there’s no time to get ANYTHING going in the match. When you count ten seconds or so to get into the ring (some people take up to twenty), you’re looking at about 45 seconds of action with the new guy before someone else comes out. That’s just not enough time to get anything going at all.

Third, and this is probably the biggest problem of the match, look at the roster here. At a glance, I see four people with actual chances to win: Crush, Luger (they’re both BIG stretches), Bulldog, and Shawn. After that there’s Owen Hart but he was one of the guys that didn’t make it thirty seconds in the ring.

Then you’re looking at guys like Montoya and Well Dunn and the Bushwhackers (who amazingly still had jobs in 1995) and the Heavenly Bodies (by my count there were five tag teams in here, or one third of the match. WAY too many guys at that level) and Dick freaking Murdoch. This is a match that was BEGGING for a midcard to come in and fill in some spots. Guys like Ramon and Jarrett and Bigelow and Tatanka would have helped this match a ton, but instead we get all these fillers. That’s a big reason why this didn’t work.

Anderson poses with Shawn to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a hard one to grade because as good as the world title match is, the Rumble sucks it right back down. IRS vs. Taker isn’t anything good but it’s much more boring than bad. The opener and tag matches are good so I can’t complain much there. 1995 would be AWFUL for the most part though, mainly due to all of the problems you could see coming in the Rumble. Still though, not an awful show by any stretch and it has a great world title match.

Ratings Comparison

Jeff Jarrett vs. Razor Ramon

Original: B+

Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. IRS

Original: D

Redo: D

Bret Hart vs. Diesel

Original: B-

Redo: A

Bob Holly/1-2-3 Kid vs. Bam Bam Bigelow/Tatanka

Original: D+

Redo: C+

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: C+

What in the world was I thinking on the title match? It was great.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/14/royal-rumble-count-up-1995/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 1994
Date: January 22, 1994
Location: Providence Civic Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Ted DiBiase

This is one of those shows where the good stuff is good but the bad stuff is REALLY bad. The main idea here is that someone has to stop Yokozuna, and it’s going to be one of three people: Bret Hart or Lex Luger who could get the shot by winning the Rumble, or the Undertaker who has a casket match against Yoko tonight for the title. Oh….this is going to be a long night. Let’s get to it.

Vince is on commentary here and gets to do his carnival barker stuff. The guy knows how to make a show sound exciting, I have to give him that. DiBiase comes out to do commentary with McMahon due to having to retire late in 1993 due to a bunch of injuries.

Tatanka vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Bigelow is in Ludvig Borga’s spot because Borga broke his ankle. Bigelow pounds on Tatanka to start and dropkicks him into the corner. Tatanka literally bounces off of Bigelow before coming back with a chop to take Bigelow down. A DDT puts Bam Bam down again but Tatanka goes up for a cross body, missing Bigelow by a mile. This is a REALLY hot start so far. Bigelow crushes Tatanka in the corner with a splash and things slow down somewhat.

Tatanka gets in a shot to the head and tries a top rope sunset flip, only to have Bam Bam sit on him. When all else fails, sit on the other guy. Off to a bearhug for about two minutes before Bigelow drops him with a shoulder block. Tatanka starts his war path thing so Bam Bam decks him in the head with an enziguri to drop him. The moonsault misses though and Tatanka goes up again, this time hitting the cross body for the pin.

Rating: C+. Shockingly hot opener here and if you cut the bear hug in half or so, this is a really solid match. They stuck to the formula really well here and the match was good as a result. This is one of the nice surprises in wrestling: on paper this sounded horrible but it turned out to be a pretty nice match. Good opener.

We recap the tag title match, which is a rare instance where it’s all about the challengers rather than the champions. Owen Hart was the only Hart Brother eliminated in the Survivor Series match against Shawn and his Knights, which ticked him off. Owen had been whipped into Bret on the apron and the distraction let Shawn roll Owen up for the pin.

This caused Owen to cut a heel promo, talking about how he was tired of being in Bret’s shadow and wanting a match with him to escape it. Bret of course said no, but instead offered to team up with Owen to get his brother his first championship. Owen talked about leading the team but seemed genuinely ok at this point. For some reason we also see the Quebecers losing the tag titles to the 1-2-3 Kid and Marty Jannetty for a single week for some reason.

The Harts talk about all the teams they’re going to give title shots to once they win the belts tonight.

Tag Titles: Bret Hart/Owen Hart vs. Quebecers

The Quebecers are managed by Johnny Polo, who would change his name to Raven in ECW. Pierre and Bret start things off with the challenger taking over. Off to Owen to work on the arm with his signature spinning counter to a wristlock. Off to Jacques and they botch something, but Owen hits a quick suplex to keep things on track. An enziguri gets two for Owen and it’s back to Bret.

After a bunch of rollups by Bret, everything breaks down and the Quebecers take over. Actually scratch that as Owen hits a kind of spear into a rollup for two and the Harts stand tall. It’s Bret vs. Jacques with Hart in control until it’s back to Owen for a gutwrench suplex for two. Bret comes back in, only to get powerslammed down by Pierre. A pair of knees to the back gets two and it’s back to Jacques.

That goes nowhere so Pierre comes in to jump into a boot. Owen comes back in and belly to bellys Jacques down before hooking the Sharpshooter. Pierre bulldogs Owen down for a fast save of course and it’s back to Pierre legally. Owen dropkicks both Quebecers down and it’s off to Bret again. For some reason both champions are allowed to stay in the ring for way too long. Pierre is atomic dropped to the floor, and now we get to the turning point of the match: Johnny Polo holds the ropes open to send Bret to the floor. Bret comes up holding his knee and he’s in big trouble.

Pierre rams the knee into the barricade to further the damage and the match turns into a kind of sloppy brawl on the floor. Owen finally throws Bret back into the ring and the leg work begins. Jacques puts on a half crab but Owen makes a fast save. The champions load up the Cannonball (kind of an aided Swanton) but Bret rolls away. Instead of tagging though, Bret tries the Sharpshooter….and the referee stops the match for the knee injury.

Rating: B-. This is one of those matches where you can look at it in multiple ways. From a match standpoint, it’s a standard tag match with the faces and heels doing exactly what they would be expected to do. On the other hand, the idea here was about setting up Owen’s heel turn, and the ending does that perfectly. There was no reason for Bret to not tag at the end and it sets Owen off as it should.

Post match Owen glares at Bret and paces back and forth. Bret manages to pull himself up but can barely stand up. Owen kicks the leg out, officially turning heel to HUGE booing. He leaves so here are some officials to come check on Bret. Ray Rougeau, a reporter for WWF at this point, comes out to interview Bret while he’s on his back in agony. For some reason that cracks me up.

Owen is in the back and goes on a huge tirade about how selfish Bret is and how Bret cost him the biggest match of his career. Bret is being carried to the back and has to watch this promo on the video screen. Owen’s face here is great as he unleashes all this pent up anger and frustration on Bret, saying he’ll win the Rumble because he doesn’t have to count on Bret. This would be the top feud for the next eight months or so.

Intercontinental Title: IRS vs. Razor Ramon

Guess who is defending here. JR and Gorilla Monsoon do commentary for this match. IRS goes on a big rant about how evil the crowd here is for not paying their taxes, even though they have about three months left to file. Razor goes off on IRS to start, knocking him out to the floor. IRS comes back with some forearms but Razor punches him right back down to take over again.

Ramon hits a bunch of basic stuff like atomic drops and clotheslines for some two counts, but IRS ducks under a clothesline to send Razor out to the floor. Back in and IRS goes up but jumps into a boot. For one of the only times I can EVER remember this happening, IRS avoids the foot and drops an elbow for two instead. WHY IS THAT SO HARD FOR PEOPLE TO DO???

We hit the chinlock for well over a minute before Razor fights up and hits the fallaway slam. The referee gets knocked out in the corner and IRS grabs his briefcase, only for Razor to take it back and clock him in the head with it. No referee though, so Razor loads up a belly to back superplex. There’s still no referee, so Razor sets for the Edge, only to have Shawn run out and clock him with the fake IC Title. IRS finally wakes up and pins Razor for the title.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t bad but the overbooking hurt it a lot. This should have lasted about three minutes less and it would have been a lot better. Oddly enough I don’t remember IRS being champion at all, but then again this is the remastered version so maybe they really cleaned things up.

Or maybe another referee comes out to explain the interference and the match is restarted. Razor hits the Edge to retain.

Bearer and Undertaker are making a coffin for Yoko.

We recap the world title match, which is Yoko being scared of Taker and Taker being one of the last hopes to stop the monster. Apparently the contract was signed before Yoko and company knew it was a casket match. Taker I believe debuted his popping out of the casket spot in this feud.

WWF World Title: The Undertaker vs. Yokozuna

They stare each other down to start and Taker fires off his uppercuts to stagger the champion. A clothesline puts Yoko down and another uppercut puts Yoko on the floor. Taker is sent into the steps and it’s immediately no sold, scaring Yoko to death again. There’s Old School but the jumping clothesline misses as Yoko ducks. Why does no one else ever think of doing that?

They fight over a chair on the floor which winds up going upside Yoko’s head. There’s a plastic chair to the back of the champion but Yoko grabs the trusty salt to blind Taker. Now it’s Taker’s back getting hit with the chair and we head back inside. A clothesline puts Taker down but he fights out of the casket. Taker wins a slugout in the middle of the ring but Yoko belly to belly suplexes him down. Come on. You know that’s not holding him down. Taker pops up and grabs Yoko by the throat and hits a DDT to put the champion down again.

Yoko is placed in the casket but here’s Crush to block Taker from closing it. Taker slugs him down so here’s Great Kabuki and Tenryu but Taker beats them down as well. Yoko is still out cold in the casket. Bam Bam Bigelow comes in now and it’s 4-1 in the ring. One has to wonder why Paul Bearer doesn’t go over and close the casket but this match doesn’t seem to be the most logical one. Fuji and Cornette have stolen the Urn.

Yoko finally gets out of the casket as Bearer beats up Fuji and Cornette, stealing the Urn back. He uses it to recharge Taker, who fights off all four mercenaries. Now it’s Adam Bomb to make it technically 8-1 but Taker fights everyone off with the salt bucket. Jeff Jarrett comes in as well, as do the Headshrinkers. That makes it NINE wrestlers (Yoko, Crush, Kabuki, Tenryu, Bigelow, Jarrett, Samu, Fatu, Adam Bomb) against Undertaker.

AND HE GETS UP. Diesel comes out and they get Taker in the coffin but he fights ALL OF THEM OFF. Yoko steals the Urn and hits Taker in the head with it before opening the Urn. Green smoke comes out of it and Taker now is powerless. Everyone hits a bunch of moves on him as this goes on WAY too long. After ALL THAT, Taker is put in the coffin and Yoko retains the title.

Rating: F. On a major wrestling show, The Undertaker just fought off ten men until green smoke was released to drain him of his power. I’ve seen Japanese anime that makes more sense than this. Oh and the match itself, as in the one on one part, might have gone about six minutes.

BUT IT GETS WORSE!

The heels all push the coffin away when a gong goes off. Smoke comes out of the casket…..and a FREAKING CAMERA FEED FROM INSIDE THE CASKET POPS UP ON THE SCREEN. Taker says his soul lives in everyone and he can’t be extinguished. He says there’s going to be a rebirth of the Undertaker and he won’t rest in peace. Then electrical noises go off and we get something like an inverse camera shot (as in it’s all in black and white but what is white is black and what is black is white).

Then, to REALLY hammer home the point, the image on the screen starts to rise up through the top of the screen (which should be the top of the casket, meaning it should be ramming into the people that put him in the freaking casket) and A FREAKING BODY RISES OUT OF THE TOP OF THE SCREEN. AS IN A TANGIBLE BODY (which might have been played by Marty Jannetty).

In other words, WWF just said Taker is something like Jesus. Oh and one other thing to really make sure this is stupid: YOU CAN’T SEE IT. All I can see are some quick shots of it when flashes go off. This is one of those things that embarrasses me as a wrestling fan. I mean…..WOW.

The usual Rumble interviews eat up some time.

Royal Rumble

Scott Steiner is #1 and Samu is #2. Also the intervals are every 90 seconds this year so the entrances will come in faster than ever. Scott pounds away to start and hits a butterfly suplex as Samu tries to hang on. He does indeed survive and kills Scott with a clothesline. Rick Steiner is #3 and Samu is in BIG trouble. After some suplexes he’s out very quickly (but not before getting his head caught in the top and middle rope which is always kind of scary looking), giving us the Battle of the Steiners.

That battle literally lasts six seconds as Kwang (Savio Vega in a mask, allegedly Asian here) is #4. Scott suplexes Kwang down and Owen Hart is #5 to BIG heel heat. The heels take over and Owen actually dumps Rick out. That’s one of the rare times where the constant pushing against the ropes worked. Bart Gunn is #6 and things speed up a bit. No one really does anything so here’s Diesel at #7. This is where things pick up as this match is without a doubt Diesel’s coming out party.

He beats on everyone and throws out Bart, Scott, Owen and Kwang inside of 45 seconds. Bob Backlund is #8 and immediately goes for the leg. He actually gets Diesel up against the ropes and upside down, but Diesel will have none of that. Who would believe these two would have a world title match in Madison Square Garden later in the year? Backlund is gone quickly. Billy Gunn is #9 and doesn’t even last fifteen seconds.

We cut to the back where Kabuki and Tenryu are destroying Lex Luger. After Diesel stands around for a bit, he has to throw out Virgil who is #10 in about thirty seconds (causing DiBiase to laugh loudly and get in some good verbal jabs). Note that the fans are LOUDLY chanting for Diesel here, who had NEVER gotten a reaction until this point. No one has been able to stand up to Diesel at all so far. #11 is Randy Savage. This should be a bit better challenge I’d think.

Savage goes right for him and pounds away on the big man in the corner before peppering him with jabs. He has Diesel in trouble but Jeff Jarrett is #12 to save the not yet Big Daddy Cool. We hear about Jarrett wanting to become WWF Champion so he’ll be a famous country singer in Nashville. And people wonder why he never got over until he completely changed everything about his character.

Savage is thrown to the apron by Jarrett but Randy comes back and eliminates Jeff with ease. Crush, who Savage HATES at this point, is #13. Diesel just kind of chills in the corner as Savage beats up Crush. The numbers finally catch up with Savage though until Crush eliminates him with ease. Doink is #14 and he gets beaten up as well but not tossed. Here’s his big rival Bam Bam Bigelow at #15 and it’s 3-1 now. Bigelow easily thorws the clown out ala the Spike Dudley throw from ECW.

Mabel is #16 and dang there are some big guys in there. He goes right for Diesel in a terrifying preview of Summerslam 95. Mabel cleans house until Sparky Plugg (Bob Holly as a racecar driver and debuting here as a replacement for the 1-2-3 Kid) is #17. Shawn Michaels is #18 and stares down Diesel to start. Everyone gets on Diesel and Shawn gives the final push to eliminate him. Diesel gets a VERY audible ovation and chant as he leaves.

Mo, Mabel’s totally useless partner, is #19. Nothing of note happens so here’s Greg Valentine in a one night only appearance at #20. Mabel misses a charge in the corner and Shawn is gorilla pressed by Crush but not eliminated for some reason. Tatanka comes in at #21. To recap we’ve got Plugg, Valentine, Tatanka, Mabel, Bigelow, Crush, Michaels and Mo in there. Valentine puts Michaels on the apron but can’t get him out.

Kabuki is #22 and almost everyone gangs up on Mabel to dump him out. It’s amazing how much easier it is to see with the big fat purple tub of goo out of there. Lex Luger (looking FINE after that attack like 15 minutes ago) is #23 and he cleans house. There are ten people in the ring right now but there goes Kabuki at the hands of Lex. Luger clotheslines Bigelow down and here’s Tenryu at #24.

There are WAY too many people in there right now. Like seriously, do we need FREAKING MO in there? Or Valentine? Those are bodies you could dump out and no one would care. Luger and Tenryu go at it as Shawn is almost dumped out. Bastion Booger is supposed to be #25 but he’s not here for some reason (Vince says it was supposed to be Bret Hart but more on that in a bit). I believe there are nine people in there at the moment so Booger not coming in was a good thing. Granted it was a good thing either way but you get the idea. Rick Martel is #26 and nothing happens.

For your big face pop of the match (other than Diesel): Bret Hart is #27 and limping very badly. Today, people would have a bandage on the knee and charge to the ring because modern wrestling is stupid. Fatu is #28 and DEAR FREAKING GOODNESS THROW SOMEONE OUT ALREADY! A bunch of guys team up and FINALLY throw Crush out as Marty Jannetty is #29. Naturally he goes right for Shawn and punches Shawn to the apron.

Adam Bomb is #30, giving us a ridiculous THIRTEEN FINAL PEOPLE in the Rumble. The final group is Bigelow, Sparky, Shawn, Mo (seriously, FREAKING MO?), Valentine, Tatanka, Luger, Tenryu, Martel, Hart, Fatu, Jannetty and Bomb. Bret saves Shawn (shocking I know) to dump out Sparky, thank goodness. Bret beats on everyone as we still need to get rid of more people. Everyone beats on everyone for awhile and nothing is happening. DiBiase: “The smart thing to do is go after Bret Hart’s knee.” Vince: “The smart thing to do is throw people out of the ring.” Did….did Vince just burn Ted Dibiase?

Martel dumps Valentine but is quickly dumped out by Tatanka. Luger throws out Bomb and Mo is FINALLY put out as well. Bigelow tosses Tatanka and Lex forearms Bam Bam out. Jannetty goes out to get us down to Luger, Hart, Fatu, Tenryu and Shawn. Tenryu rams Shawn and Fatu’s heads together which only hurts Shawn of course. Luger and Bret put out Tenryu and it’s Bret vs. Shawn (duh). Luger goes for Fatu’s head and gets superkicked for being stupid.

The heels put Luger on the apron but he fights them both off and clotheslines Fatu into a 360. Bret dumps Fatu and Luger dumps Shawn and we’re down to two. They slug it out and Luger picks up Bret, but they both fall out at the same time, giving us a double elimination to end the Rumble.

Rating: C+. This is a hard one to grade. The pacing is TERRIBLE with guys like Sparky Plugg and Mo staying in for over twenty minutes each, but the action is solid for the most part. The stuff with Diesel is excellent and it truly made him a star. The ending stuff once they got rid of about seven guys in 90 seconds was good too, but stuff in the middle didn’t work all that well.

Post match there’s a disagreement over who wins but both guys have their music played. This would lead to a somewhat complicated decision where there was a coin toss and two world title matches at Mania. This goes on for about eight minutes or so but it’s just the referees arguing and both guys saying they won. Replays don’t really show us anything either. They do a good job here of making it impossible to tell who won, unlike in 2005 when it was clear that one of them (I want to say Cena) hit first. They’re finally declared co-winners to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show is one where it’s very hard to come up with an overall grade. I really liked the opener and the tag match and Rumble were both good, but when a show has what might be the dumbest moment in wrestling history (and that covers A LOT of stupid moments), it’s brought down a lot. Early 1994 was not a good time for the WWF but once they finally picked Bret as the guy, things got a lot better.

Ratings Comparison

Tatanka vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: B

Redo: C+

Quebecers vs. Bret Hart/Owen Hart

Original: A+

Redo: B-

Razor Ramon vs. IRS

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Yokozuna vs. Undertaker

Original: F

Redo: F

Royal Rumble

Original: B

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: C-

DANG I liked this show a lot better on the first viewing.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/13/royal-rumble-count-up-1994/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 1993
Date: January 24, 1993
Location: ARCO Arena, Sacramento, California
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

This is a pretty forgotten show for reasons that should be obvious. First of all, this is 1993, one of the worst years in company history from a creative standpoint. Bret is defending the title against Razor Ramon (his only world title shot ever) and we’ve got the Rumble for the title shot at Wrestlemania for the first time. I don’t know if that’s official here, but the winner did indeed get the shot at the biggest show of the year. Let’s get to it.

Historical note: this is 13 days after the debut of Monday Night Raw.

Steiner Brothers vs. Beverly Brothers

For you ECW freaks, Bill Alfonzo is the referee. Scott and I think Blake start things off. This is the Steiners’ first major match and the fans seem to love them right off the bat. Scott immediately takes him to the mat with a top wristlock, causing Blake to freak out with a claim of tights being pulled. That sequence worked so well that they do it again. Heenan is very excited about the debut of Narcissist, which is Lex Luger as a guy obsessed with his muscles. In other words, Lex Luger debuts tonight.

After Blake stalls some more, here’s Beau to taunt the not legal Rick. There’s the tag to Rick who chases Beau around and hits Blake in the process. A powerslam puts Rick down and I don’t think Gorilla knows which Beverly is which. Since this is a Steiners match, it’s time for suplexes! Scott nearly kills Beau with a belly to belly and everything breaks down for a bit, allowing the Beverlies to take over on Scotty.

We get into a standard formula with Scott having his back worked on by both villains. Blake chokes with a tag rope in the corner for two. Heenan: “Gotta hook the tights.” Gorilla: “WHAT?” I love how shocked he sounds every time Heenan says something like that. Beau puts on a Boston Crab but Scott easily pushes out of it. Blake blocks a tag and let’s make sure that we’re LIVE still. What was WWF’s obsession with that?

Scott avoids an elbow drop but Blake breaks up the hot tag again. The crowd is silent when the Beverlies are on offense. Scott comes back with a butterfly powerbomb to put Blake down and Scott actually dives through the ropes and tags at the same time. Rick cleans house and there are Steiner Lines for both Beverlies. Scott pounds on Blake in the corner and counters a Doomsday Device with a victory roll for two. The Frankensteiner to Beau gets the pin.

Rating: D+. Pretty dull match here as the Steiners were clearly going to dominate the entire time. The Beverlies never got above lower midcard status and their biggest feud was against the Bushwhackers. What were you going to expect them to do against the freaking STEINER BROTHERS? Nothing here but a squash.

We recap the Rockers’ time together and their split. If my eyesight is correct, you can see Shane Douglas as a jobber. After the Barber Shop incident, Jannetty was out for months. He finally returned on Superstars, setting up the match tonight for Shawn’s Intercontinental Title. During his return, Jannetty accidentally hit Sheri with a mirror, which is important to know for the match.

Intercontinental Title: Marty Jannetty vs. Shawn Michaels

Sherri is at ringside with the question being who would she side with? Why would she side with Marty anyway? I never got that. Apparently it’s because Shawn never called her while she was in the hospital….which she was in because of Marty. So why would she ever go with Jannetty? Apparently Jannetty was drunk during this match. That might make things a bit funnier if nothing else.

Jannetty controls to start, sending Shawn to the floor twice with a knee lift and a clothesline. Marty punches Shawn down on the floor and poses in the ring. He tries a punch off the top but gets caught in the ribs on the way down. Shawn loads Marty up on his shoulder and in one of the only times I can ever remember it working, rams Marty shoulder first into the post.

The champ rams the other shoulder into the post because he hit the right one the first time, and you just don’t do that. Back in and Shawn hits a shoulderbreaker before sending Marty to the floor again. Back in and the shoulder goes into the buckle, followed by a double ax right down onto it as well. We hit the armbar but Marty fights out quickly. He tries a comeback but walks into a DDT on the arm for two.

Quick sidebar: why is that move called a single arm DDT? It’s a hold used on the arm, but the double arm DDT is used to hurt the head. Also a regular DDT uses just one arm, so why is this called a single arm DDT instead of the regular one? These are the kinds of things I think about when I’m bored by a match.

Anyway, Shawn does the always stupid looking jump into the boot spot. I mean he jumped RIGHT AT Marty’s feet. What could he possibly have been trying there? Marty avoids a charge in the corner, sending Shawn’s shoulder into the post instead. Marty speeds things up and pounds away, only to have Shawn slingshot him out to the floor. Shawn goes to pick him up but Marty suplexes him out to the floor.

Sherri finally does something by slapping Shawn, who gets belly to back suplexed into the ring. Shawn gets launched to the floor again as the pace picks up a bit. A powerslam puts the champ down but Shawn avoids the top rope punch. Marty stops himself before crashing and gets two off a DDT. Shawn misses a superkick and gets caught by one of his own for two. The crowd is getting into this.

Marty slingshots Shawn so he gets to do his big bump onto the post. There goes the referee via an elbow to the face and Sherri comes in. She swings her shoe but hits Marty by mistake of course. Shawn yells at her a lot and then superkicks Marty in the chest for the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. This started slow, picked up a good bit during Marty’s comeback, and then had a horribly uninteresting ending. Seriously, that’s it? These two would have a rematch soon after on Raw which won Match of the Year in a contest for least bad match of the year for all intents and purposes.

In the back, Gene yells at Sherri to calm down. Marty comes to the back for some more brawling.

Heenan and Gorilla argue a bit.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Big Boss Man

Bigelow jumps Boss Man in the corner to start and Boss is in trouble early. He gets whipped into the corner and a Bigelow forearm knocks him to the outside. This is one of those “do one move then stand around for awhile” matches. Boss Man comes back with some clotheslines and some punches to the “face” in the corner. Another right hand and a bulldog puts Bigelow down but Boss Man’s charge is countered by a backdrop to the floor.

Off to a body vice by Bigelow which is a rather dull move as usual. A hot shot puts Boss Man down for two and some shots to his back keeps him down. We hit the body vice again but Boss Man comes back with a suplex. It hurts him more than Bigelow though, as Bam is up first. Boss Man starts his real comeback with a punch to the face and a running crotch attack to Bigelow’s back. Bigelow gets a boot up in the corner and clotheslines Boss Man down. The flying headbutt gets the pin.

Rating: D. This was pure filler and not even entertaining filler. Bigelow was on the rise at this point while Boss Man would be gone in less than two months. On top of that, the match was really dull with Bigelow laying around and working on Boss Man’s back most of the time, which doesn’t make for an interesting match at all.

We get a clip from WWF Mania (Saturday morning show) of Razor beating up Owen to hype the world title match.

Razor says he’s got gold around his fingers and neck and now he wants it around his waist.

Bret says he’s ready.

WWF World Title: Razor Ramon vs. Bret Hart

Feeling out process to start with Razor getting the early advantage with some right hands. A knee in the corner misses and Bret has on the Figure Four in less than 90 seconds. Razor gets the rope so Bret drops elbows on the knee instead. The leg gets wrapped around the post before Bret goes after the other leg in the corner for some reason. Ramon comes back with a whip to send Bret ribs first into the post.

Now we get to the best part of any Bret Hart match: him getting the tar beaten out of him. Some backbreakers on the floor keep Bret down and we head inside again. Razor pounds on the ribs some more and hits the fallaway slam for two. Helen Hart (Bret’s mom) is in the front row. There’s the chest first into the buckle bump from Bret for two more and it’s off to the abdominal stretch, another Razor trademark.

As always, Bret reverses Hall’s hold into one of his own before getting hiptossed over. Bret is sent to the floor on a kickout and gets two on a sunset flip. We hit the reverse chinlock by Razor, followed quickly by a bearhug. Bret bites his way out of it and sends Razor to the outside in a quick move. The champion follows it up with a suicide dive and the comeback is on.

Bret pounds away in the corner over and over as we hit the brawl. For a guy known as a technical master, Bret brawled an awful lot. Not that he’s bad at it or anything but it happens really often. There are the Five Moves of Doom but Razor gets to the rope before the Sharpshooter is on. The second attempt doesn’t work either as Razor pulls the referee into a pile with the two of them.

Ramon goes right back to the ribs and Bret’s momentum is stopped dead. A belly to back superplex is blocked by Bret into a belly to back suplex for two for the champ. Razor clotheslines Bret down but Bret escapes the Razor’s Edge into a backslide for two. In a pretty awesome ending, Bret counters a test of strength into a sunset flip in a sweet flip counter, followed by grapevining the legs together on the mat and turning Razor over into the Sharpshooter for the submission.

Rating: B. Good match here and again, why did Razor never get more title matches? I know he wasn’t the kind of guy to make the world champion, but are you telling me that when the company was falling apart at times they couldn’t throw him in there as a token challenger? I would have bought him as legit threat to any champion, but it never happened. I’ve never gotten that. Anyway, solid match here as you would expect from these two.

Heenan unveils Narcissist, which is Lex Luger in front of a bunch of mirrors. Lots of posing commences and Heenan sounds like he’s in love. Well at least extreme lust. Luger says he’ll be dominant. Not much here. A curtain is lowered over Luger and Heenan actually gets on his knees, begging to see more. I’ve heard of overtones but this is ridiculous.

Here are Caesar and Cleopatra to hype up Wrestlemania. They read a proclamation about it and this is really stupid.

Royal Rumble

Ric Flair is #1 and Bob Backlund, going through a career resurgence at the time, is #2. Backlund drops Flair with a shoulder and does his little dance. Flair pounds him into the corner but Bob backdrops him down. Papa Shango is #3 and is dumped out by Flair in less than thirty seconds. Backlund it sent to the apron and Flair stomps away. They chop it out until Ted DiBiase, I believe half of the tag champions here, is #4.

Heenan makes fun of Backlund as the double teaming ensues, prompting Gorilla to threaten to knock Bobby out. Backlund is beaten on even more until Brian Knobs is #5. The Nasties are good guys at this point and happen to be feuding with Money Inc. Guess who he starts swinging at. Knobs almost dumps Flair but only gets him to the apron. Things slow down for a bit until Virgil is #6. The faces team up to fight the heels as not a lot is going on at this point.

DiBiase tosses out Knobs and we’re down to four in the ring again. Here’s the pretty new Jerry Lawler at #7 in a HUGE cape. I think he’s a heel here but Flair grabs him for some chops almost immediately. Flair goes to the floor through the middle ropes so Virgil goes after Lawler. Flair gets back in and Jerry immediately goes after him. Oh never mind as Heenan is praising Lawler. He’s a heel alright.

Max Moon (presumably played by Konnan) is #8. He hits a few moves and is dumped by Lawler before anyone else shows up. Lawler’s attire is really intricate here with lots of writing on it instead of the usual two color design. I kind of like it for a change. Japanese legend Genichiro Tenryu is #9 and he starts a chop-off with Flair as you would expect them to do.

Things slow down a bit until Mr. Perfect is #9 at a full sprint. Heenan: “OH NO! OH DEAR GOD NO!!!” Perfect immediately goes after Flair so Ric goes to the top. There’s the slam off the top and the Hennig Neck Snap as Heenan is having a heart attack. We hear about the loser leaves the WWF match tomorrow on Raw between the two of them, which is a very rare match for some reason.

Skinner is #11 and he does nothing before Perfect shoves Flair out to a HUGE pop. Lawler (looking very different here for some reason that I can’t place) pounds away on Hennig as we’re back down to six people in there. That’s usually the right amount so thankfully they’ve gotten through the first third without things getting too hectic. Koko B. Ware and those big green pants of his are #12. Heenan: “Koko B. Ware could go to Wrestlemania to face Bret Hart. Gorilla: “What’s wrong with that?” Heenan: “IT SHOULD BE RIC FLAIR!!!”

Perfect dropkicks Skinner out and not a lot is going on again. Here’s Samu at #13, giving us a group of Backlund, DiBiase, Tenryu, Virgil, Perfect, DiBiase, Lawler and Ware. Lawler and Perfect keep going at it in a feud that could have been AMAZING in Memphis. Berzerker is #14 as we need to get rid of some people in there. Lawler misses a charging punch on Perfect and there he goes. With Perfect distracted, DiBiase and Ware team up (you’ll NEVER hear that again) to kick him out with an assist from Lawler. Virgil was thrown out during that melee, getting us down to just six again.

The Undertaker is #15 to a BIG pop. Gorilla calls him the odds on favorite. I’m not sure I’d go that far but whatever. Berzerker goes to the floor and beats up Backlund (not eliminated) with a chair. Taker puts Samu out and no sells a lot of Tenryu’s stuff before dumping him as well. We’ve got Backlund (mostly dead on the floor), Taker, Berzerker, DiBiase and Ware in at the moment. Terry Taylor (he still had a job at this point?) is in at #16 and he’s gone in less than thirty seconds thanks to DiBiase, as is Ware.

There’s a chokeslam to DiBiase and Taker dumps him, leaving Berzerker against Taker. In one of the biggest “oh great it’s this guy” moments ever, Giant Gonzales debuts as Taker dumps Berzerker. Gonzales, a legit 7’7 tall, stares down at Taker as Damien Demento (don’t ask) is #17. Gonzales chops Taker out for an illegal elimination. In case you’re not familiar, Gonzales is a monster who makes Great Khali look like Lou Thesz. Speaking of Khali, he was literally the same character as Gonzales in a repeat of the same exact story the Undertaker was involved in in 1992. In short, both of them sucked and were really tall.

Gonzales destroys Taker for a bit as Demento still won’t get in. IRS is #18 as the Giant is still beating up Taker. It’s IRS, Backlund and Demento at the moment with Taker out cold in the corner. Tatanka is #19 as Paul Bearer uses the Urn to revive Taker. This of course is all the fans focus on, making the match in the ring look even less interesting than it already is, which is saying a lot when you think about it. Lots of choking ensues until Jerry Sags is #20.

There is NOTHING going on here and I don’t think Typhoon at #21 is going to help things at all. Fatu is #22 and my goodness I have never heard more silence for an entrance. NOTHING is going on here and Earthquake is #23. He immediately goes after….Typhoon, his partner. They have a fat man brawl for a bit until Quake dumps him out. Carlos Colon, aged 44 and called a youngster by Monsoon is #24.

Colon dumps Demento as the eliminations are keeping the crowd on life support. Quake can’t put Backlund out as Tito Santana is #25. Fatu misses a charge at Backlund and eliminates himself. We’ve got Quake, Backlund, Santana, IRS, Tatanka, Colon and Sags in there at the moment. Rick Martel is #26 who is STILL feuding with Santana. Why did they never have a big match to blow off that feud? It went on for like four years or so.

Earthquake dumps IRS and now we get to the first interesting part of the match in WAY too long: Backlund is sent to the apron and the crowd collectively gasps until he gets back in. Gorilla actually swears at how big the reaction is. Yokozuna is #27 and it’s time to clear some space. Yoko and Tatanka chop it out and there goes the guy with red hair (figure out which is which).

Colon is out and it’s time for the fat man showdown with Quake vs. Yoko. They collide a few times and no one moves so Quake pounds him into the corner. Owen Hart is #28. Quake splashes Yoko in the corner but the second attempt misses. Yoko suplexes Quake out and that more or less seals the winner. Repo Man is #29 and is immediately dropped by Yoko. Everybody gangs up on Yoko and it doesn’t work at all.

Randy Savage is #30, giving us a final group of Savage, Yokozuna, Repo Man, Owen, Martel, Santana, Sags and Backlund. They’re not even trying to hide the winner at this point. Yoko dumps Tito as Owen dropkicks Sags out. Owen skins the cat to save himself before being dumped by Yoko and possibly injuring his knee. Repo is out and we’re down to four. Backlund actually picks up Martel to sit him on top and punches him out. The place is WAY into Backlund here, so he goes after Yoko. A pair of dropkick put Yoko against the ropes but Backlund charges into the elimination, drawing a standing ovation.

So it’s Savage vs. Yoko and the beating of the small man begins. Yoko flattens him over and over again until Savage fires off a bunch of kicks out of the corner. The fans are trying to get behind Savage and there’s a top rope ax handle. One to the back gets Yoko down to one knee. Uh…why would you want to knock a guy this big DOWN in a battle royal?

Either way he superkicks Savage to knock him down again and there’s the belly to belly. The legdrop crushes Savage but the Banzai Drop misses. In one of the STUPIDEST endings ever to the Rumble, Savage hits the elbow and COVERS, getting launched over the top rope on the kickout to send Yoko to Las Vegas for the title shot.

Rating: D. This was one of the worst Rumbles of all time. The main problem here is the period after Taker, the only guy you could actually see eliminating Yoko, was eliminated. From then until the time Backlund got close to the longevity record (which he got), there’s NOTHING. It’s a bunch of lame midcarders standing around lifting each others’ legs in the air. Why would I want to see that at all? Anyway, nothing to see here and a BAD Rumble.

Overall Rating: D+. There’s a reason no one cares at all about 1993 WWF: it’s really not very good. The title matches here aren’t bad but other than that, this show is pretty freaking terrible. The Rumble sucks the life out of the show, as the highlights are a two minute segment between Flair and Perfect and the Backlund part at the end. When the whole match is 65 minutes long, that doesn’t hold up. Weak show here.

Ratings Comparison

Steiner Brothers vs. Beverly Brothers

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Shawn Michaels vs. Marty Jannetty

Original: C

Redo: C+

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Big Boss Man

Original: D+

Redo: D

Bret Hart vs. Razor Ramon

Original: B

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: D

Redo: D+

Not much change here.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/12/royal-rumble-count-up-1993/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

I ramble about Montreal for a while.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-twenty-years-way-many-references-since-montreal/

Survivor Series 1997
Date: November 9, 1997
Location: Molson Centre, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Attendance: 20,593
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We had to get here eventually. This is the show that changes everything in wrestling and officially launches the WWF into a new era. Aside from the big moment on the show, we also have a very injured Steve Austin challenging Owen Hart for the Intercontinental Title and the in ring debut for Kane (at least in that character). Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the Iron Man Match between Bret and Shawn at Wrestlemania XII, where Shawn won the title in overtime. Bret has since gone insane and claimed conspiracy after conspiracy against him, mainly led by Vince and Shawn. The main event tonight is Bret vs. Shawn II. By that I mean about Bret vs. Shawn VIII (It’s not even their first world title match at Survivor Series) but you get the point.

There’s a Karate Fighters (game at the time) blimp flying around. I’m sure people who paid good money for their seats are THRILLED that they get to look at a blimp instead of being able to see the ring.

Team New Age Outlaws vs. Team Headbangers

New Age Outlaws, Godwins

Headbangers, New Blackjacks

The Outlaws are of course Billy Gunn and the Road Dogg, the Headbangers (a hard to describe team that wore skirts and jumped into each other) are Mosh and Thrasher, and the Blackjacks are Barry Windham and Bradshaw. Windham (looking FAT here) starts with Phineas, the latter of which is immediately knocked to the floor with a shoulder block. This is when the Outlaws are a new team of jobbers who would soon shock the world and win the Tag Team Titles from the Legion of Doom.

Off to Bradshaw, who looks skinny here by comparison to what he would become. Phineas gets a boot up in the corner as the evil ones take over. The Outlaws don’t want to come in so it’s off to Henry instead. Bradshaw gets two off a legsweep and puts on an abdominal stretch before falling back and rolling up Henry for the pin. Back to Windham to face Phineas, with Barry hitting a gutwrench suplex and a lariat for two. Phineas comes back with a clothesline of his own for the elimination and to tie it up at three.

Mosh comes in to take over on Phineas with a devastating armbar. It’s off to Billy who beats down Mosh and receives homophobic chants in his general nature. Or maybe it’s something in French. We get down to some basic wrestling and the fans go SILENT. Mosh tries a bulldog but Billy shoves him off and gets the pin for a quick elimination. It’s Thrasher/Bradshaw vs. Phineas/Outlaws.

Thrasher (who actually had a big hand in training Big Show) comes in and works on the arm but Phineas takes him down in return. This has been really dull so far. Thrasher goes up and hits the Stage Dive (top rope seated senton) for the pin to make it 2-2. Off to Bradshaw vs. Road Dogg with the former pounding away. A gutwrench powerbomb puts Dogg down but a Billy distraction lets Dogg get a school boy to pin Bradshaw.

Thrasher pounds on Dogg but walks into a pumphandle slam. He counters into a cover on the Dogg but Billy comes off the top with a legdrop. Now when I say legdrop, I mean he literally is a foot away from Thrasher but gets the pin anyway. This looked so bad that even though I had seen it before, it still made my jaw drop. The Outlaws survive.

Rating: F-. The ending alone makes this a failure, but on top of that, the best worker in this match was Thrasher by far. Let that sink in for a minute. The Outlaws had only been the Outlaws for a month and a half or so at this point so no one cared about them, the Godwins are as interesting as corporate accounting, the Blackjacks are the Blackjacks, and the Headbangers are barely interesting at all. This was a horrible match and an even worse choice for an opener.

Truth Commission vs. Disciples of Apocalypse

Jackyl, Interrogator, Sniper, Recon

Crush, 8-Ball, Skull, Chainz

The Truth Commission is based on a real South African thing, where there were a lot of crimes were committed during Apartheid and the government said “tell the truth that you committed/witnessed these crimes and say you’re sorry.” Amazingly enough it calmed a lot of people down and made the situation a lot better. That being said, I have NO idea why it’s used as a wrestling gimmick. In short, they’re a military themed group. That sums them up as simply as I can.

The Comission is led by Jackyl, who is more famous as Cyrus in ECW. Interrogator is a monster more famous as Kurrgan and the real star of the team. Sniper is a French Canadian wrestler who means nothing and Recon is Bull Buchanan. Crush is Crush, 8-Ball and Skull are big twins and Chainz is Brian Lee from ECW. This really doesn’t scream interesting to me but this is during the Gang Warz period which didn’t ever do anything for me.

Interrogator and Chainz start things off after a brawl with Chainz hammering away but having no visible effect. A sidewalk slam eliminates Chainz in about a minute. Off to Recon vs. 8-Ball with Recon hitting a World’s Strongest Slam for no cover. Jackyl comes in for what might be the only match he ever wrestled in WWF. He’s much better as a manager anyway.

Jackyl drops a top rope knee which is immediately no sold. He chops away a bit but walks into a sidewalk slam from 8-Ball for the pin to make it 3-3. Sniper jumps 8-Ball and hits some elbows for two as Jackyl is on commentary now. Off to Crush, the leader of the team, who stomps away on Sniper a bit. Recon comes back in to face Skull and a collision sends Skull to the floor. 8-Ball comes in illegally and clotheslines Recon down for the pin.

Sniper comes in to beat on Skull but gets caught in a double spinebuster from the twins for two. Interrogator hits 8-Ball from the apron and Sniper hits a bulldog for the elimination, making it 2-2. If this match sounds like a total mess that is hard to follow, it’s because that’s being nice about what’s going on.

Off to Crush for a figure four headscissors on Recon. Skull DDTs Sniper but walks into a sidewalk slam from Interrogator for the pin. It’s Crush vs. Sniper/Interrogator and Crush immediately powerslams Sniper down for the pin. Interrogator is in the ring before the pin hits and ANOTHER sidewalk slam gives Interrogator the final pin and the victory.

Rating: F. In ten minutes, we had seven eliminations, four of which were by the SAME FREAKING MOVE. This was another match where just like the first, there was no one out there that could carry things to make the match work in any way. It makes Interrogator looks good, but it barely accomplished that because of how bad the match was.

We’re about thirty five minutes into the show and it may be the worst thirty five minutes to open a show that I’ve ever seen.

Some fans are split over the main event.

Austin answers some questions from America Online.

We recap Team Canada vs. Team USA. Steve Blackman is in the match for the Americans now after running into the ring to save Vader on Monday so tonight is his debut.

Vader says his team doesn’t look the same but that’s because they’re Americans.

Team Canada (captained by an Englishman) says they’ll win.

Team USA vs. Team Canada

Team USA: Vader, Steve Blackman, Marc Mero, Goldust

Team Canada: British Bulldog, Jim Neidhart, Doug Furnas, Phillip Lafon

Team America comes out to what would become Kurt Angle’s music and naturally are booed out of the building. The Canadians come out to Bret’s music to make sure the idea is hammered home. Furnas is from Oklahoma and Neidhart is from Nevada, but Jim had dual citizenship so it’s not as backwards.

Mero, wearing a hat, starts with Bulldog. Mero takes off the hat and Bulldog wipes himself with it, making him a hero in Canada. Bulldog knocks Mero to the floor and makes fun of Blackman’s martial arts in a funny bit. Vader comes in sans tag and works on Smith’s arm but jumps into a slam. Bulldog EASILY suplexes Vader and it’s off to Lafon.

Back to Mero who hits a knee lift but gets his head kicked off by Lafon, followed by a clothesline for two. Off to Neidhart and then right back to Lafon. Blackman comes in and JR points out that Steve isn’t a wrestler. Lafon DDTs him for two and gets a crucifix for the same. Blackman fights off Team Canada on his own but gets caught on the floor in a fight with Furnas and Lafon, resulting in a countout elimination.

It’s Mero vs. Neidhart now with Jim missing a middle rope splash. Vader comes in and Neidhart knocks him down twice in a row. Vader comes back with the running body attack and a splash for the pin. Back to Lafon for some kicks to send Vader to the floor. Vader gets back in and Lafon is sent rolling to the corner, followed by a big belly to belly to put him down. A middle rope splash is enough to eliminate Lafon, leaving Bulldog and Furnas vs. Vader, Mero and Goldust.

Furnas comes in to pound away but misses a dropkick, allowing the tag in to Mero. Has Goldust been in there yet? Mero pounds Furnas down and goes up for a moonsault press and it looks AWFUL, with Furnas going down like he was trying to powerslam Mero out of the air but Mero hitting the move like usual. Either way it gets two and it’s off to Bulldog because Furnas doesn’t seem to be sure what planet he’s on.

Mero escapes the Bulldog powerslam and blasts Smith with a right hand. Back to Furnas who fires off the rights and lefts. Furnas does the exact same thing, but Mero is a legitimate former amateur boxing champion so that’s not really a fair contest. Mero tries a rollup but gets reversed into one by Furnas who grabs a handful of tights to get us down to 2-2.

Vader pounds on Furnas as the King laments Sable having to leave with Mero. Furnas clotheslines Vader down and it’s off to Bulldog again. Goldust, who apparently has a broken hand (thanks for letting us know earlier), STILL doesn’t want to come in. Vader suplexes Furnas down but Furnas hits him low. When Vader gets another break from Bulldog, Goldust hides on the floor instead of tagging.

Furnas suplexes Vader down but doesn’t tag. A Frankensteiner takes Vader down for two but Vader is right back up. Vader slugs Goldust in the face and pulls him into the ring. Goldust walks out for a countout but Vader slams Furnas down and hits the Vader Bomb for the elimination. Vader turns around and is knocked silly with the ring bell from Bulldog for the final elimination.

Rating: C-. This was a better match by miles and miles than the first two, mainly due to people with actual talent being in there. On top of that, the people CARED about the match and it makes the match a lot better by result. The result was never in doubt given how worthless Team America was, but it was cool to see Vader getting to be his old self, even for one night. The match still wasn’t great but after the first two matches tonight, this was a masterpiece by comparison.

Buy Austin’s shirt!

We recap Kane vs. Mankind, by talking about Undertaker. The idea here is that Undertaker kept saying Kane wasn’t alive, but Bearer insisted he was. Kane showed up at Badd Blood and cost Undertaker the first Cell match. Kane destroyed various people, including Dude Love. Dude left but was replaced by Mankind, who offered to stand up to the monster and tonight it’s Kane’s debut match. Mankind’s solution to Kane: hit him in the head with a pipe. I love it when things get basic like that.

Mankind promises to charge against a brick wall as many times as it takes until it goes down, and if he dies launching himself into that brick wall, so be it. If that’s what it takes to get to Paul Bearer, so be it.

Kane vs. Mankind

The brawl starts immediately on the floor with Kane throwing Mankind into the steps. Kane has the red arena lights ala Sin Cara during his matches at this point. With Mankind half dead in the ring, Kane does the corner fire deal and the match starts. Mankind fights up and a Cactus Clothesline puts both of them on the floor. Kane knocks him right back down and throws the steps at Mankind’s head to take him down again. Total brawl so far, as it should be. Back in and Mankind charges into a big boot but Kane chokes away in the corner.

Kane sends it to the floor again and beats on him some more, but Mankind hot shots him onto the steps to slow the monster down. A chair to the head knocks Kane back into the ring and there’s a piledriver, but Mankind goes after Bearer by mistake. Kane sits up and chokeshoves Mankind off the apron and through the announce table. The Spanish table of course.

Kane loads up a chokeslam on the floor but Mankind kicks him low (which only works on Kane on occasion) and DDTs him on the concrete. The elbow off the apron hits Kane again but Kane sits up and slams Mankind off the top to the floor. Back in and Mankind literally pulls himself up to his feet and is immediately tombstoned for the pin.

Rating: C+. When you have a new guy you want to put over, you call Mick Foley. This is a match you have to think about to get why it worked. First and foremost, Kane is supposed to be a monster who has very little experience in the ring. Think of him like Jason from Friday the 13^th who just wants carnage instead of wanting to wrestle. These two beat the tar out of each other and it made Kane look unstoppable. That would continue for about five and a half months until the Dead Man came back.

Vince says the main event will happen tonight.

Team Legion of Doom vs. Nation of Domination

Legion of Doom, Ken Shamrock, Ahmed Johnson

Faarooq, The Rock, Kama Mustafa, D’Lo Brown

The Nation of Domination is a black power stable led by Faarooq, a brawler. Rock is of course Rocky Maivia, Mustafa is a fighting machine later to be known as the Godfather, and Brown is the closest thing to a high flier the team has. The LOD, Tag Team Champions here, and company talk about being ready for war. Shamrock is a former UFC Champion trying his hand at wrestling. Brown and Hawk start with D’Lo bouncing off of him. Hawk no sells a piledriver as is his custom and a neckbreaker puts Brown down. Off to Rocky who gets knocked around but someone hits Hawk in the back and the yet to be named Rock Bottom eliminates him.

Ahmed comes in and “hits” a jumping back elbow to take Rock down. Kama, quite the monster in his own right, is in next and takes Johnson down with one shot. Faarooq is in next to work on Ahmed’s ribs and continue a feud that went on for like a year. Brown whips Ahmed with a belt which the referee somehow doesn’t hear. Faarooq loads up the Dominator but Johnson escapes (while falling down) and hits a Pearl River Plunge for the elimination.

Brown comes in again and hits a quick Low Down (frog splash) for no cover. Johnson starts no selling and hits a sitout gordbuster. Faarooq is still at ringside. Rock comes in but walks into a spinebuster. Ahmed hits the ropes but Faarooq trips him up and holds the foot so Rocky can get the pin. It’s Animal/Shamrock vs. Brown/Rocky/Kama at the moment. Animal comes in to face Rocky but it’s quickly off to Shamrock. Ken is still somewhat new here so his style still looks fresh.

A big dropkick puts Rocky down and it’s off to Kama. After getting beaten around for a bit, Kama puts on a front facelock to slow things down. A double clothesline puts both guys down and some LOUD noise freaks everyone out. Even JR and King don’t know what it was. Animal gets two off a legdrop but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. Kama showboats a bit too much though and Animal dropkicks him in the back and grabs a rollup for the pin.

Brown comes in and during the distraction, Rocky hits Shamrock low for two. D’Lo hooks a chinlock followed by a backbreaker, but his moonsault misses by about two feet. The Outlaws come out while wearing the stolen LOD shoulder pads, and we’ve got powder and a shoved referee. Animal gets counted out during this mess, leaving us with Brown/Rock vs. Shamrock.

JR talks about how many people Shamrock has made tap out. Jerry: “This is wrestling. You don’t win by making people tap out.” JR: “…….YEAH YOU DO!” Brown starts but it’s both Nation members in there at once. Shamrock runs them both over, suplexes Brown and gets the submission via ankle lock. Rock cracks Ken in the back with a chair shot but it only gets two. Rock hits his spinning DDT for two as does the People’s Elbow (not a thing yet). Ken comes back with a northern lights suplex and a standing hurricanrana. There’s the ankle lock and Rocky is done.

Rating: C. This was a little messy but it pushed Shamrock hard while the heat for Rocky was INSANE. The crowd hated him and Vince certainly took notice. Both of these guys would get huge pushes in the next year with Rock’s being a major step up. The LOD were in their very last run here and they didn’t go out well after that. Fun match here although not great from a technical standpoint at all.

We recap Austin vs. Owen. Austin was challenging for the Intercontinental Title at Summerslam when Owen piledrove him, legitimately hurting his neck (and in the long run saving the company because of what Austin had to evolve into) and paralyzing Austin for a few minutes. Austin amazingly enough finished the match and won the title (with the worst rollup of all time), which is remarkable when you think about it. He had to forfeit the title a month later due to the injury but tonight he’s going for it again.

Intercontinental Title: Steve Austin vs. Owen Hart

Owen is defending, having won the title in a tournament since Austin was hurt. Owen has Lafon, Furnas and Bulldog with him. Hart stalls forever on the floor while rocking an Owen 3:16 (I Just Broke Your Neck) shirt. Neidhart tries to sneak in on Austin but walks into a Stunner. The champion gets in a shot to start and tries a piledriver, much to the crowd’s delight. Owen wraps the knee around the post but gets kicked in the face.

The Hart Foundation leaves and Austin clotheslines Owen in the back on the floor. Hart puts Owen onto the broken Spanish Announce Table before choking away with a cord. Hart wants to be DQ’ed and rings the bell early. Keep that in mind for later. Back in and Austin stomps Owen in the corner, hits the Stunner and wins the title. It’s as quick as it sounds.

Rating: D+. This was barely four minutes long. I’d assume they were unsure about how long Austin could go out there and if that’s the case it’s more than understandable. Austin would again forfeit the title a month later because he wanted to go after the World Title, which he would of course win at Wrestlemania.

Attitude. It’s here.

We recap Bret vs. Shawn. This is Bret’s chance to get his win back from Shawn at Wrestlemania 12. Bret was bitter at Shawn after a massive heel turn, so there’s some great hatred going on here. Ironically enough Shawn cost Undertaker the title, giving it to Bret, at Summerslam.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn is European Champion coming into this for no particular reason other than he wanted Bulldog to not have the title anymore. Shawn wipes himself with the Canadian flag (something else taken from Bulldog) during his entrance to further make himself public enemy #1. We get the long tracking shot for Bret’s entrance which is always cool to see. Shawn jumps Bret to start but Bret snaps on him and beats Shawn right back down to the delight of the crowd.

A HARD clothesline puts Shawn on the floor and Bret is going off. I don’t think the bell rang yet. Bret takes it to the crowd and Shawn is reeling. Vince, Commissioner Slaughter and a half dozen referees are at ringside now. JR talks about how this could be Bret’s last match if he loses. Shawn gets an American flag bandana and chokes him into the crowd. Remember the match hasn’t started yet. Bret backdrops Shawn over the barricade and back to ringside.

Shawn keeps trying to piledrive Bret on the concrete but Hart keeps escaping. They head back into the crowd with Bret in total control. They go to the entrance and Bret decks a referee. Back into the ring they go and the bell FINALLY rings as Bret chokes Shawn with a Fleur de Lis. Shawn comes back with the forearm and nipup as the fans question Shawn’s sexual orientation.

Michaels chokes with the flag as Bret has a busted hand. Shawn stalls a lot because that’s the kind of guy he is. Back to the floor with Shawn pounding on Bret and spitting on the crowd. Shawn drops Bret face first on the steps and breaks a Canadian flag over his knee. Back in and Shawn hits a top rope ax handle and it’s off to a front facelock. Bret escapes in what has to be the loudest reaction to a broken front facelock of all time.

Shawn comes back and slams Bret down but Bret rolls through a cross body off the top for two. Bret puts on the Hartbreaker, the figure four around the post for a bit before going after the knee in almost perfect Ric Flair fashion, down to the cannonballs down to the knee and a Figure Four.

Shawn finally turns it over and Bret gets a rope. A Russian legsweep gets two for Bret as does a snap suplex. Bret goes up but Shawn pulls the referee into the way so the shot hits Hebner instead. Shawn rakes Bret’s eyes, puts Bret in the Sharpshooter, and Hebner calls for the bell to give Shawn the title in the most infamous moment ever in wrestling.

Rating: B-. I’m only talking about the match here. The main thing to keep in mind about the famous ending is that there was about twenty minutes of brawling and of the actual match before the finish. I think that’s something people forget because of the famous part. The match we got was quite good, which isn’t really surprising given how familiar these two were with each other. It’s no masterpiece, but it felt like an epic encounter, which is what it needed to do.

Now we’ll get to the big white elephant in Montreal. I’ve not going to pretend like I have some big insight into what happened because I certainly don’t. Long books have been written about what happened here and there’s no point in rehashing the whole thing all over again. In short, it was Bret’s last match, he didn’t want to lose the title in Canada, a screwy finish was agreed on, Vince changed the ending and screwed over Bret, Bret wasn’t seen in WWE for almost thirteen years.

After all the years since then, I think both parties were wrong, but Bret needed to get over himself. So what if he had to lose the title in Canada? I get that he couldn’t stand Shawn, but for someone who seems to pride himself on being oh so professional, it’s pretty lame to say he doesn’t want to lose the title in another country when he made it clear he was leaving.

Vince was in major trouble at this point and was under a lot of pressure. While I don’t think he believed Bret would trash the title on Raw, he had to be worried about something happening, like the title having no value if Bret never lost it, which is understandable. Did he go about the issue the right way? No, but it wasn’t a normal circumstance. Vince did what he thought was best and while it caused a ton of controversy, it was one of the few things he could do. There are a to of different ways you can look at it, and there isn’t a single right answer.

Overall Rating: D. Main event aside, this was a pretty bad show overall. The first forty minutes are AWFUL, the next match is just ok, Kane vs. Mankind is decent, the next match is about building for the future, the match after that was basically a squash, and the main event was good but not great. When the best you can do is good but not great, you’ve got a problem. They’re pretty lucky that only the main event is remembered here, because the rest of the show sucked.

Ratings Comparison

Team New Age Outlaws vs. Team Headbangers

Original: D+

Redo: F-

Truth Commission vs. Disciples of Apocalypse

Original: F

Redo: F

Team Canada vs. Team USA

Original: B+

Redo: C-

Kane vs. Mankind

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Team Legion of Doom vs. Nation of Domination

Original: B

Redo: C

Steve Austin vs. Owen Hart

Original: C

Redo: D+

Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart

Original: B+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B+

Redo: D+

Now there’s a major change, likely the biggest so far.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/06/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1997-what-a-screwy-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 

Survivor Series 1996
Date: November 17, 1996
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,647
Commentators: Jim Ross, Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

I had three options for an older redo this year (this one, 1988 and 1992) but this one had the most Survivor Series matches plus Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart, which was more than enough to sway me over. This is an interesting time for the company as they’re just starting to get squashed by WCW but the future is here tonight. Let’s get to it.

Free For All: Team Bart Gunn vs. Team Billy Gunn

Bart Gunn, Aldo Montoya, Bob Holly, Jesse James

Billy Gunn, Salvatore Sincere, Justin Bradshaw, The Sultan

This would be the Kickoff Show today. I’ve actually never reviewed this and there’s a chance I’ve never even seen it before. The team names are pretty arbitrary as there’s little rhyme or reason for these pairings, save for maybe the brothers, meaning no one is really a captain. James (Road Dogg of course) is a country singer here and the REAL Double J as part of a stupid angle with the departed Jeff Jarrett. Ok so I might have With My Baby Tonight (his self-performed theme song) on my iPod. At least the angle wasn’t a total loss.

As the Sultan (Rikishi) and Aldo (Justin Credible as a Portuguese man with a jockstrap for a mask) start us off, JR mentions that Austin vs. Hart is a #1 contenders match, which really wasn’t mentioned very often on the actual pay per view. Montoya actually does some damage to Sultan by dropkicking him out to the floor but a cover results in him being launched off. A bad looking piledriver sets up the camel clutch and Montoya is eliminated in a hurry.

Holly comes in with a bulldog as we see Aldo walk up the ramp opposite the cameras (an MSG standard). Sultan grabs a chinlock and we take a break to come back with Sultan slamming Bart on the floor so Sincere (a flamboyant yet still generic Italian) can baseball slide him in the face. Back in and Bart grabs a side slam to get rid of Sincere and tie the match up.

Bradshaw (who JR says is going to be something special) comes in and kicks the freshly tagged Holly in the face. We go to a split screen to see Austin running Dok Hendrix out of his dressing room and come back to Bradshaw hitting the Clothesline From an Undisclosed Location to eliminate Holly.

Jesse immediate rolls Bradshaw up for the elimination (ignore Billy kicking Jesse and breaking up the pin at two while the referee keeps counting anyway), leaving us with Jesse and Bart vs. Billy and Sultan. A rollup gets rid of Sultan but the Fameasser (yet to be named) does the same to Jesse. We’re down to a battle of the Gunns and Bart gets tied up in the ropes for some trash talking. Billy calls him an SOB, meaning he isn’t likely to get a Christmas card from his own mother. Bart stands up for Mama Gunn and hits a running forearm for the pin.

Rating: C-. This is a good example of a match where you have to consider the purpose. They weren’t trying to settle any big score here or blow the roof off the place. This was about getting the fans warmed up before we got to the real show and the fast pace did that well enough. Billy vs. Bart wasn’t anything interesting but at least it was a little story to tie things together. Nothing good but it did its job well enough.

The opening video looks at the WWF taking over New York (including the Hall of Fame banquet at a hotel, which would be the last one for seven and a half years) before going into a look at the two major matches. You know you have a stacked card when you’re getting hyped over two matches that don’t even include Undertaker vs. Mankind or any of the show’s namesake matches.

Team Furnas and Lafon vs. Team Owen Hart/British Bulldog

Doug Furnas, Phillip Lafon, Henry Godwinn, Phineas Godwinn

Owen Hart, British Bulldog, Marty Jannetty, Leif Cassidy

This is Furnas and Lafon’s WWF debut as they were brought in to challenge Owen and Bulldog for the Tag Team Titles. Marty and Lafon (I can never remember which is Furnas and which is Lafon) start things off with a nice little acrobatics display, capped off by a hard shot to Marty’s jaw. Leif comes in instead as the announcers talk about slander. The slow pace continues and it’s off to Phineas for a headlock. JR: “You ever see Hilary Clinton do that?”

For some reason Leif thinks it’s a good idea to slap Phineas in the face and spit on him. Well to be fair, given all the sweat and liquid on his overalls, it’s not the worst idea in the world. Owen comes in to wake the crowd up and it’s time to pick Phineas apart. The heels start working Phineas over as JR wants a third referee out here.

Marty hits a good looking back elbow to the jaw as the announcers start talking about Bret, though at least they tie it in to Owen. Today that would go off on a tangent and turn into ripping on Byron Saxton. I mean, he deserves it but it’s still annoying. Marty goes up top so Phineas tries a superplex. JR: “Now how stupid was that?” Oh dang it I always forget how annoying heel JR is. Even heel Cole wasn’t this bad.

Henry comes in, kicks Marty in the gut, and Slop Drops him for the first elimination. Not that it means much as Owen rolls Henry up to tie the score five seconds later. Phineas cleans house (has a fit, whatever) but Bulldog makes a blind tag and powerslams him to go up 3-2. Furnas comes in to speed things WAY up (and turn up the quality as well), only to miss a dropkick, which JR calls one of the best in the business. Like I said, heel JR wasn’t the best.

Leif comes in to cover and the former powerlifter sends him flying on the kickout. The bad guys get smart with a blind tag and a springboard missile dropkick to wipe Furnas out in a great looking visual. JR goes into yet another rant about the referees not catching the heels cheating, which is a really weird complaint for a heel to have.

Cassidy misses a charge and Furnas brings in Lafon for a snappy looking reverse superplex to get us down to two on two. The lack of a reaction to Leif being eliminated really shouldn’t surprise anyone as he was just so out of place in this match. Owen comes in for a belly to belly and a middle rope elbow (both of those looked very smooth) for two. A low blow to Furnas has Vince freaking out but JR, the heel commentator here, lets it go right past him. Again: it was a bad character and you could sense he wasn’t a fan of the whole thing.

It’s back to Bulldog who is quickly sunset flipped for the elimination, which is a big deal as it means Furnas and Lafon can pin Owen and the Bulldog in a two on two match. Bulldog leaves Lafon with a parting gift of a chop block though and Owen follows it up with the Sharpshooter. Furnas is in for the save and hits that dropkick of his (basically a dropkick with a backflip), followed by a German suplex for the final pin.

Rating: B. This was more like it for the opener as they set up the next challengers for the Tag Team Titles, though the first part with the Godwinns really brings it down. It also doesn’t help that the crowd didn’t care for the most part, and can you really blame them? The good guys were people making their debuts and hog farmers. It’s good wrestling but not the brightest idea.

Paul Bearer insists he WILL NOT get into the cage and be hung above the ring. Mankind will crush Undertaker like the cockroaches he used to eat for dinner.

Undertaker vs. Mankind

Bearer is in an individual cage above the ring and if Undertaker wins, Bearer is his for five minutes. The entrance is an important one as Undertaker descends from the rafters and debuts the sleeveless leather attire that would become his signature look for the next several years. It marks the evolution of the original character to the newer, sleeker fighting machine that could hurt people at will.

It’s a brawl to start (duh) with Undertaker using a drop toehold (?!?!?) followed by a fireman’s carry into a cross armbreaker. Undertaker gets smart by working over Mankind’s hand, which JR thinks is illegal. Mankind takes it into the crowd and is quickly backdropped right back to ringside but pops up for a cannonball off the apron. There’s something to be said about someone launching their body at someone else.

Undertaker’s comeback is cut off by a Texas piledriver and the Mandible Claw goes on. Undertaker is smart enough to send Mankind straight outside for the save and both guys are spent from the physicality. A kick to the chest sends Mankind flying hard into the barricade for a sick sounding THUD. You just can’t fake that kind of brutality. Well you can but it’s easier to believe it’s real with Foley.

Old School is broken up so Undertaker opts to punch Mankind in the face multiple times. The chokeslam is countered with the Claw, only to be countered by a big chokeslam with the camera going wide for an awesome visual. Mankind is back up though (as always) and pulls out a spike to stab Undertaker a bit. Amazingly enough, Undertaker doesn’t care to be stabbed and Tombstones Mankind for the pin instead.

Rating: B. This was a BIG change of pace for Undertaker as he was moving faster and acting like a much more well rounded wrestler, which he would be for a long time. These two were solid together as always as they just beat the heck out of each other for long stretches of time and that’s always worth a watch. This is one of their lesser known matches but it’s certainly entertaining.

Post match the cage is lowered and Undertaker goes right for Bearer, only to have the Executioner run out for the save, allowing Bearer to escape. That would be Undertaker’s next match before he continued attempting to murder Bearer and Mankind.

Sunny comes out to replace Lawler on commentary. When you look at so many of the women who would come after her, Sunny really is remarkable. She looks great but she’s also dripping with charisma, which so few women (or men for that matter) have at this level.

Team Helmsley laughs off the idea of Team Marc Mero because they’re a man down due to Mark Henry being injured.

Team Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Team Marc Mero

Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jerry Lawler, Goldust, Crush

Marc Mero, The Stalker, Rocky Maivia, Jake Roberts

There’s a lot to cover here. Helmsley is Intercontinental Champion, having stolen the title from Mero with the help of the now departed (to WCW) Mr. Perfect. The Stalker is Barry Windham who used to be a military themed guy but is now just Barry Windham with a big mustache. Roberts is Mark Henry’s replacement as Lawler and Roberts are feuding over Jake’s alcoholism.

Oh and it’s Rocky’s debut after weeks of videos talking about how amazing he is. The mind blowing part: they undersold what he would become. The commentary gets even more entertaining as Sunny goes nuts ripping on Sable, claiming to be all natural even down to her hair.

We hit the stall button to start with no contact for the first two minutes. After several tags, Goldust and Mero finally lock up as the announcers discuss Mr. Perfect without saying he’s gone. Marc’s armbars don’t go anywhere so it’s off to the Stalker as JR rips on Barry’s attire. Helmsley comes in and immediately runs from Mero, meaning we get Crush vs. Rocky for his in ring debut. Thankfully that lasts all of ten seconds before it’s off to Lawler for some great selling. Vince actually mentions the name Dwayne Johnson as Sunny suggests being able to take Rocky all the way to the top.

The heels start taking turns on Rocky until he backdrops Helmsley for a breather. Jake gets the hot tag to clean house despite looking a good bit out of shape and very pale. Lawler comes in and slowly hammers away while making alcohol jokes. The DDT scores out of nowhere and it’s 4-3 in a hurry. The mustache with the Windham attached suplexes Goldust for two but a shot from the apron sets up the Curtain Call to tie us up.

Both captains come in as the crowd stays mostly silent. Again though, is there any real reason to care? Crush isn’t interesting, Roberts looks awful and no one knows who Rocky is yet. Helmsley grabs an abdominal stretch and Goldust pulls on the arm, sending heel JR into his second frenzy in an hour.

The referee finally catches Helmsley cheating to break the hold and it’s a Merosault (moonsault pres) to get rid of Hunter. Crush comes in and gets dropkicked to the floor, only to avoid Mero’s slingshot dive. As we’re watching the replays, the announcers completely miss Crush giving Mero the heart punch (exactly what it sounds like) for the elimination. Jake gets the same thing and is eliminated ten seconds later.

So we’re down to Rocky, meaning we get a closeup of his ridiculous looking hair. To his credit, even Rock has said he looked ridiculous at this point. Rocky slugs both guys down and does that stupid arm flailing thing of his. A crossbody puts both guys down and Crush heart punches Goldust by mistake. Rocky hits a second crossbody to get rid of Crush and a shoulder breaker ends Goldust for the win. The pin gets a nice pop, though it might just be because the match is finally over.

Rating: D. They accomplished the goal of giving Rocky a good rub to start (hence why you have goons like Crush around to take a fall like this) but this was WAY too long. You could probably cut out five to ten minutes here and do just about the same thing. Windham was worthless (as he was for most of the time after 1990 or so) and there were way too many stretches of boring non-action dragging it down.

Now it’s time for the real main event as we recap Bret Hart vs. Steve Austin. I know Shawn vs. Sid is going on last but make no mistake about it: this was the most important and anticipated match of the night. Bret had been gone since losing the WWF World Title to Shawn at Wrestlemania XII and Austin has turned into a disrespectful rebel who doesn’t care about legacies or what anyone before him has done. You can see the fire in Austin’s eyes and Bret is the only one that can stop him. Or slow him down at least because there may be no stopping Austin anymore.

Austin says he’s ready and isn’t worried.

Bret says this is about respect, which he’ll receive from Austin no matter what.

Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart

The winner gets the title shot next month. Even Vince has to acknowledge the face pop Austin receives here in New York. Bret gets a great face reaction of his own but Austin really isn’t impressed with the pyro. JR thinks this might come down to a submission, which might be some great foreshadowing for Wrestlemania. He goes even further by saying Bret isn’t a clown or a trashman because he’s a wrestler. Uh, Doink and Droese were wrestlers to Jim. We’re still not ready to go as Vince possibly spoils the main event by saying the winner of this gets Sid.

Austin flips him off to start and we’re ready to go. Feeling out process to start as JR goes back to that submission idea. Vince: “How ironic would it be if Steve Austin put the Sharpshooter on Bret Hart and made him submit?” They trade wristlocks to start and you can see some extra fire in Bret for this match.

Bret takes him down and stays on the arm with a hammerlock until a hard elbow to the jaw puts him down. Austin keeps slugging away until Bret pulls him into another armbar. Bret: “ASK HIM!” Did Jericho get that from Bret? Steve comes right back with a hot shot and starts choking on the bottom rope.

We hit the chinlock and JR goes back to that submission idea again. That’s three times now and it’s really not adding anything new. Back up and it’s time for the slugout with Austin easily taking over as you would expect. Bret comes back with his usual offense but gets shoved chest first into the buckle, again as is his custom. Austin’s superplex is broken up though and Bret goes all the way to the top for the elbow.

They head outside with Austin driving the back into the post as the brawling continues to favor Austin while Bret wins the wrestling. Makes sense. Of course as soon as I say that, Bret throws him through (yes through) the barricade and Austin is suddenly reeling. Just because it’s required, they fight over the announcers’ table with Austin taking over (JR: “It seems that it always happens to the Spanish guys!”) and dropping an elbow onto Bret. The table actually doesn’t break though in a very rare sight.

Back in and we hit the abdominal stretch as Austin continues to know how to focus on a body part. The referee catches Austin holding the ropes (which doesn’t add leverage but helps block a hiptoss counter) so it’s time for a slugout, capped off by Bret hitting a Stun Gun for two. Austin is right back up with a top rope superplex but Bret does the lifting the legs spot (looked horrible here as they were both down for several seconds before going for it) for two.

The Stunner hits out of nowhere for two and JR makes a REALLY good save by saying Bret only kicked out because Austin rolled him away from the ropes. That protects the move, which is completely lost on today’s product. Austin grabs a Texas Cloverleaf, followed by a Bow and Arrow of all things. Unfortunately Austin makes the mistake of trying to mat wrestle with Bret and has to grab the ropes to avoid a Sharpshooter. Back up and Austin grabs the Million Dollar Dream but Bret walks the turnbuckle and flips back onto Austin for the surprise pin.

Rating: A+. Like this would get anything else. I know most people (including myself) say that the I Quit match made Austin a star but he’s not getting to that match without this one. Austin was always a great talent but this was the moment where you knew he was ready for the main event stage. Notice something important about the ending: Bret caught Austin for the pin rather than really decisively beating him. It shows that as great as Austin is, Bret was just that much better and used his experience to win.

Make no mistake about it though: this is a masterpiece and one of the best matches of all time. Unfortunately there was a rematch that is somehow even better and this is a bit forgotten as a result. I’ve heard people say they like this one better and I really can’t argue against that. It’s a must see match and an incredible lesson in giving someone the rub of their career.

JR: “I don’t think anyone, including Shawn Michaels or Sid, could have beaten Bret Hart in this ring on this night.” Vince: “I totally disagree with that.” No followup or anything and the tone was very heelish.

Sid says he’ll win.

Faarooq/Vader/Razor Ramon/Diesel vs. Flash Funk/Savio Vega/Yokozuna/???

Here’s another match with a bunch of notes. Faarooq debuts his traditional Nation look here, thankfully ditching the ridiculous blue gladiator gear. Flash Funk is also making his debut after years as the far better 2 Cold Scorpio. That would be fake Razor and Diesel (duh) with the former just looking horrible. Fake Diesel at least looks like the real thing if you look at him from the right angle. Again, the original idea here wasn’t bad: it’s the gimmicks that got them over instead of the people. Unfortunately that falls apart because Fake Razor looked horrible.

Jim Cornette (Vader’s manager) sits in on commentary and JR says he’s the same size as Yokozuna. Cornette sounds like he wants to cry when he sees Funk for the first time. JR: “I’ve never seen the yellow and red look so good here in the Garden.” The mystery partner is Jimmy Snuka, which gets a mild reaction from the MSG fans and a groan from the audience at home who already saw a legend return with Roberts earlier.

Vader slugs Funk down to start but is quickly sent outside for a moonsault to the floor. You can hear the ECW chants before they even start. Back in and Vader gets tired of this flying nonsense and powerbomb Funk in half. Yokozuna comes in for the embarrassing fat man offense as JR rips on the refereeing again. It’s off to Vega vs. Ramon as the crowd isn’t sure what to care about here.

JR and Cornette argue about whether JR could manage a Wendy’s. JR: “I could if you were in town.” Razor screws up the fall away slam and thankfully it’s off to Funk vs. Diesel so we can get something watchable. Vega comes back in and gets pummeled in the corner as this is already dragging horribly. Snuka get the tag to a pretty anemic pop and quickly runs into Diesel’s knee. In a big surprise, Snuka actually slams Vader. Not bad for a guy who hasn’t been around in forever.

Jimmy almost runs over for the tag back to Vega, who hits maybe 10% of a spinwheel kick on Diesel. Faarooq rams him into the post and the Jackknife ends Vega to hopefully start wrapping this up. The Superfly Splash ends Ramon less than a minute later and then the remaining six come in for the big brawl, resulting in a massive DQ and no winner.

Rating: F-. If there’s a worse Survivor Series match not involving four clowns, my therapy must be working because I’ve completely blocked it from my mind. This was HORRIBLE with eight people that the crowd wasn’t interested in seeing and a nothing ending that only made things worse. Absolutely terrible here as they couldn’t even have Vader survive to give him a bit of a rub?

We recap the main event which is basically Shawn fighting another monster but this time it’s someone he used to trust. Yeah this is hardly anything interesting and feels like a major letdown after Austin vs. Hart. Also, given how badly the ratings were doing around this time, there’s almost no way Shawn is keeping the title here.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Sid

Shawn gets a John Cena style pop as a sign of the times. Sid is challenging of course and pounds Shawn down early on with JR getting right to the point: Sid isn’t technically sound but he can hit you really hard, which is all he needs to do. Shawn speeds things up with some left jabs and a headlock takeover.

The threat of a powerbomb sends Shawn bailing to the outside and we have a breather. Back in and Shawn gets smart by going after the knee, including a Figure Four (actually done on the proper leg). The hold is turned over and Sid sends him shoulder first into the post to take over. Shawn goes right back to the knee and the fans boo him out of the Garden. Thankfully they catch on to the idea and Sid blasts Shawn to the floor with a clothesline.

Back in and Sid gets in a few kicks to the face, followed by a big backbreaker for two. We hit a cobra clutch of all things (Sid would use that occasionally and it always looked weird for someone his size) before a chokeslam drops the champ. Shawn hits his flying forearm and is loudly booed, though the nipup draws a high pitched pop.

Sid grabs a camera and hits Shawn’s manager Jose Lothario in the chest, followed by Sweet Chin Music to the giant. With Jose grabbing his chest, Shawn goes to check on him instead of retaining the title. Sid tries to throw Shawn back in and the referee gets bumped, allowing Sid to hit him with the camera. The powerbomb gives Sid the title (somehow the first title he ever won) to a BIG face pop.

Rating: B+. I don’t like the ending with the camera thing but it’s still a really well put together match. This was pretty much Ric Flair vs. Sid and since Shawn knows how to wrestle a Flair match as well as anyone ever (including Flair), there was almost no way this wasn’t going to work. They let Shawn walk Sid through the match and that was all they ever needed to do.

Shawn checks on Jose as Sid poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade as the Survivor Series matches were horrible but everything else ranges from very good to masterpiece. That’s more than enough to say this is a great show and worth checking out. If nothing else there are so many debuts and repackages here that it’s worth checking out for pure history. The MSG crowd helps provide so much energy and the show is just a lot of fun (save for the one horrible match, which only lasts about ten minutes). See this one at least once but watch Bret vs. Austin as many times as you can.

Ratings Comparison

Team Jesse James vs. Team Billy Gunn

Original: N/A

2012 Redo: N/A

2016 Redo: C-

Team Furnas and Lafon vs. Team Owen Hart/British Bulldog

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Mankind

Original: C+

2012 Redo: B

2016 Redo: B

Team Jerry Lawler vs. Team Jake Roberts

Original: D

2012 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: D

Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

2012 Redo: A+

2016 Redo: A+

Team Vader vs. Team Yokozuna

Original: D-

2012 Redo: F

2016 Redo: F-

Shawn Michaels vs. Sycho Sid

Original: C-

2012 Redo: B

2016 Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2012 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B

This was mostly the same as four years ago, save for me liking Rocky’s debut a lot more back then. That smile must have made me go weak in the knees.

Here’s the original review is you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/15/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1996-bret-vs-austin-the-prequel-and-rock-debuts/

And the 2012 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/04/survivor-series-count-up-1996-thats-blue-chip-right-there/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series 1995
Date: November 19, 1995
Location: USAir Arena, Landover, Maryland
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect, Jim Ross

Aside from the main event, there really isn’t much else to talk about. The rest of the show is dedicated to the midcard, save for the return of the Undertaker. He’ll be captaining the Dark Side to face the Royals, led by King Mabel, who helped crush Undertaker’s face a few months prior. Let’s get to it.

We start with Razor Ramon, talking about being in the first Wild Card match. The idea here was to take faces and heels and mix them up. It was an interesting concept but like most Survivor Series matches, it didn’t mean anything and wasn’t done again.

Mr. Perfect is introduced as a surprise commentator.

We actually get an opening video which is about Bret going A-Diesel hunting. The idea is old vs. new. It’s no countout and No DQ tonight, basically meaning a street fight.

BodyDonnas vs. Underdogs

BodyDonnas: Skip, Rad Radford, Tom Prichard, 1-2-3 Kid

Underdogs: Barry Horowitz, Hakushi, Marty Jannetty, Bob Holly

The idea here is people that care about their looks vs. jobbers. Horowitz scored one of the biggest upsets ever over Skip (Chris Candido, a fitness guru. He would later be joined by Prichard under the name Zip. Their manager was the famous one though: Sunny). Jannetty needs no introduction as a jobber.

The Kid is a mystery partner who is freshly heel here. By freshly I mean this is his first match as a heel. Razor comes out to go after the Kid who screwed him over on Raw on Monday. Raw is finally a big deal at this point too. Razor is Intercontinental Champion of course. Radford is Louis Spicolli in a grunge gimmick. Holly is a racecar driver and Hakushi is a Japanese wrestler with tattoos all over his torso.

Prichard and Jannetty start things off and Marty has to fight out of the heel corner. The Kid holds him there but Prichard hits Kid with a knee by mistake. The BodyDonnas huddle on the floor until it’s off to Radford vs. Marty. Radford is called a BodyDonna in training because he’s pretty fat. Here’s Holly to face Rad and he takes Radford over with a hurricanrana. Radford tries the same thing but gets powerbombed down.

Off to Hakushi who is pretty freshly face. He gets behind Radford but walks into a spinebuster. Off to the Kid who hits a top rope splash on Hakushi for two and it’s time for Captain Skip. Hakushi escapes a belly to back superplex and it’s back to Holly who speeds things up. Prichard comes in as the fans want Barry. A powerbomb counters a hurricanrana from Holly but Tom misses a moonsault. Holly hits a top rope cross body for the elimination. Skip immediately comes in and rolls up Holly to tie it back up.

Hakushi comes in again and trips up Skip before elbowing him in the face. A Vader Bomb hits knees though and Skip gets control back. A shot to the chest takes Skip down so here’s the Kid again. The fans want Barry but it’s Hakushi taking over with a Muta Elbow in the corner. A top rope shoulder takes Kid down for two but Hakushi misses a springboard splash. Razor is watching in the back. Kid kicks Hakushi in the back of the head and Radford gets the easy pin.

Barry comes in and gets pounded down and the fans almost explode. Naturally this match would be the end of his push because that’s how it works in the WWF, though I don’t think Horowitz had a long shelf life. Radford and the Kid double team Horowitz but he comes back with a jawbreaker to Rad. Skip tells Rad not to pin Barry yet because he wants to get the pin himself.

Radford hits a Hennig neck snap as Hennig is stunned at the reaction to Horowitz. Rad stops to exercise and gets cradled by Barry for the pin. It’s Skip/The Kid vs. Barry/Marty. Horowitz gets distracted by a double team and the Kid dropkicks him in the back, setting up a legdrop for the elimination. So it’s Marty down two on one but he avoids a charging Skip in the corner.

A sunset flip out of nowhere gets two for Marty and the Rocker Dropper (a fancy Fameasser) puts Skip down and Marty goes up. Sunny crotches him but Skip gets countered into a Superbomb (powerbomb off the top, which would be Skip’s finisher in ECW) for the elimination. It’s one on one now and a missile dropkick gets two for the Kid. A moonsault misses Marty though and they’re both down. Jannetty dropkicks him down for two and here comes Sid (Kid’s partner). A Rocker Dropper takes the Kid down for two but Sid guillotines Marty on the ropes and Kid steals the pin.

Rating: B. This was a good match to open things up with, especially since I don’t think anyone would have been able to buy Barry Horowitz captaining anything but an opening match team. Other than that though, the action here was good and it set the Kid up as a somewhat big time heel which is what he needed so soon after a turn. Good opener.

Razor threw a fit in the back after the loss, throwing a monitor against the wall in the process.

Three members of I guess you would say the heel Wild Card team (Dean Douglas, Owen and Yokozuna) say that Razor needs to channel his energy into their match later, since he’s their partner.

Team Bertha Faye vs. Team Alundra Blayze

Bertha Faye, Aja Kong, Tomoko Watanabe, Lioness Asuka

Alundra Blayze, Kyoko Inoue, Sakie Hasegawa, Chaparita Asari

Bertha is an overweight and not incredibly attractive woman and is Blayze’s main rival for Blayze’s Women’s Title. She tells the fans to shut up in an attempt to get people interested in this match. The rest are Japanese wrestlers who didn’t spend a lot of time in the WWF. Asari and Asuka start things off with Asuka taking her head off with a spinwheel kick. At least I think that’s what happened because we’re getting a wide shot of the arena for the opening bell. Asari, a member of the face team, stands about 4’9 and is a tiny thing whereas Asuka looks like a monster.

Off to Blayze who is more Asuka’s size for a slam on the Lioness. Back to Asari who debuts the Sky Twister Press (a corkscrew moonsault) in America. Asuka doesn’t sell it but you can’t ask everything of her. Vince has no idea what to call it but JR is there to clean up for him. Blayze comes back in and hits a German suplex to eliminate Asuka. It makes the names easier to keep track of if nothing else.

Watanabe comes in but misses a dive. Blayze sends her to the floor and does hit her dive to take over. Hasegawa comes in and hits five rolling double underhook suplexes on Watanabe as Perfect makes sexist remarks. Watanabe hits a seated senton off the top for two as this selling thing is still an issue. Aja Kong, a total monster, comes in with no tag and is immediately kicked in the face and suplexed by Hasegawa. Another Rock Bottom suplex puts her down but Hasegawa jumps into a kick to the chest. Something like a belly to back suplex eliminates Hasegawa to make it 3-3.

Asari comes in and is quickly dispatched by a middle rope splash. If you can’t see the ending of this match coming, you fail your exam. Blayze comes in but tags out almost immediately to Inoue. Inoue looks like a cross between a Rocker and the Ultimate Warrior. By the time I finish typing that, a seated senton eliminates her. Kong put out three girls in about 90 seconds.

So it’s Blayze vs. Faye, Kong and Watanabe. All three get in the ring at once but Watanabe stays in. A snap suplex gets two for the champion and a slow motion piledriver gets the pin to make it 2-1. Faye comes in and after some basic shots in the corner, gets caught in a German suplex to make it one on one. Kong hits a superplex for two and she crushes Blayze in the corner for a bit. Alundra hits a bad hurricanrana for two and a standing moonsault for the same. Blayze goes up but gets headbutted down and the spinning backfist gets the pin for Kong.

Rating: C+. The match was fun stuff considering it only had ten minutes to get through seven eliminations. Kong would have been a great challenger for Blayze, if the division had stayed around. Blayze would show up on Nitro in about a month and throw the WWF Women’s Title (and her career for the most part) in the trash. Fun match but too rushed to mean anything.

A Bill Clinton impersonator is here. He says he’s been watching Bam Bam Bigelow since Bigelow was a kid and playing with Pebbles.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Goldust

Goldust has been around about a month at this point. This is when Goldust was just a movie fanatic at this point and not, you know, trying to screw everyone on the roster. Bigelow is obsessed with fire here, which makes sense given his looks and attire. After about a four minute entrance, we’re ready to go. Then we get some stalling to go with the long entrance.

Goldust tries to get in Bigelow’s mind but gets knocked to the floor for his efforts. Back in and Bigelow slugs him down but charges into a boot in the corner. Goldust gets rammed into the post on the floor but he comes back with a clothesline to send Bigelow back to the floor. Back in and it’s a front facelock as this match keeps dragging along. Bam Bam is thrown to the floor but comes back with a clothesline. A headbutt misses and Goldust rides Bigelow on the mat. Bam Bam comes back with an electric chair but gets taken down by a lariat. Bigelow makes a comeback, misses a charge, and gets bulldogged down for the pin.

Rating: F. This was an eight minute match. Look at the length of what I wrote and tell me how this match ran eight minutes. Goldust was all mystique and no substance for a year or so until he figured out how to wrestle a match as Goldust instead of as Dustin Rhodes in a funny outfit. This was Bigelow’s last match in the company ever.

Clinton wastes more of our time but now with Bob Backlund, who isn’t a big fan.

We recap Mabel vs. Undertaker. Mabel was fat and won the King of the Ring. Then he dropped some big fat legs on Undertaker, crushing his face. Tonight it’s about revenge.

Royals vs. Dark Side

Royals: King Mabel, Jerry Lawler, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Isaac Yankem

Dark Side: Undertaker, Fatu, Henry Godwin, Savio Vega

Mabel is on a throne carried by about five guys, all of whom look like they’re about to have hernias. The idea here is you have King Mabel, King Lawler, the blue blood Helmsley, and the Royal Dentist Isaac Yankem. About two years later, Isaac would put on a mask and remember that he’s Undertaker’s brother Kane. What exactly is dark about Undertaker’s partners isn’t really clear. Fatu is MAKING A DIFFERENCE and is supposed to be some kind of hero for kids in the projects. Godwin is a hog farmer and Vega is a street fighter from Puerto Rico.

Undertaker’s entrance is as huge as you would expect it to be. He has this skull looking mask on now which would eventually be purple and look very stupid. Fatu and Hunter start things off. The Dark Side even has matching t-shirts that say Rest In Peace. Fatu throws Helmsley around to start but we almost get a Pedigree, which is only broken up by a glare from Undertaker. Off to Godwin, who was feuding with Hunter at this point in the standard culture clash feud.

Off to Lawler who immediately tags in Yankem. A big hop toss puts Isaac down but he sends Henry into the corner to escape. Back to Helmsley, which I’m getting tired of typing. If only there was a shorter version of his name. Perfect: “You know Helmsley likes to be called Triple H.” Thank you Mr. Perfect. Anyway, Godwin gorilla presses HHH, holding him up for a LONG time.

Lawler comes in and gets Savio, which is a clash of styles if I’ve ever heard of one. Vega pounds away on Jerry and Fatu does the same. Yankem gets in a knee to Fatu’s back and the evil King takes over. The smaller evil king that is. Isaac comes in to slam Fatu and a legdrop follows. Mabel comes in but misses a splash in the corner. Vega pounds on Mabel in a rematch of the KOTR final. A side slam kills Vega but there’s no cover.

Vega gets beaten on in the corner to fill in more time. Yankem is listed as 6’8 or 6’9 here, which means he would have grown about three or four inches by the time he became the Big Red Machine. A HHH knee drop gets two on Vega as the crowd is silent because none of this means anything. This is all just filler until we get to the Undertaker tag when the place is going to erupt.

Lawler’s piledriver on Vega gets two. Well it’s not Memphis so it’s understandable. Lawler knocks Vega into the corner…..and here’s Undertaker. Jerry gets thrown around by the throat and no one will tag him. Tombstone and pin on Lawler, tombstone and pin on Yankem, chokeslam and pin on Helmsley, and there’s just Mabel left. He immediately belly to belly suplexes Undertaker down and drops the face crushing legdrop before dancing a bit. There’s the situp and Mabel runs for the countout. The four eliminations took two minutes and two seconds.

Rating: D+. This whole match ran just under fifteen minutes and about two of those meant anything. Everything was waiting for Undertaker to come in and dominate, which he did quite well, but getting there was pretty dull stuff. This match is more fun for looking at what these people would become rather than what they are now. Undertaker would lose the mask soon enough thank goodness.

Bret is ready for Diesel and isn’t looking forward to the defense he’d have at the next In Your House against British Bulldog. He talks about Wayne Gretzky and wonders if he himself is still the best ever. Today he’ll find out.

Diesel isn’t worried about Bulldog and he’s going to take care of Bret tonight.

DiBiase and Cornette have a small argument before the next match. Shawn comes in and says chill.

Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna

Shawn Michaels, Ahmed Johnson, British Bulldog, Sycho Sid

Yokozuna, Owen Hart, Razor Ramon, Dean Douglas

This is the Wild Card match with all of the mixed up partners. It’s also Ahmed’s (a very large, muscular intimidating man) PPV debut. Sid is Shawn’s other former bodyguard but they split after Wrestlemania XI, turning Shawn face in the process. Douglas is the original Damien Sandow, which is a ripoff of the Genius. We get going with Owen vs. Shawn which is of course very fast paced stuff. Shawn sends him to the floor and after ducking a tennis racket shot from Cornette, taps Cornette’s pants with said racket. Back inside and it’s Douglas pounding away on Shawn and suplexing him down.

Shawn comes back with a forearm followed by a double ax off the top rope for two. Douglas misses a Vader Bomb so Shawn comes back with a moonsault press for two. It’s off to Ahmed who gets to destroy everything in sight but he can’t slam Yokozuna. After a big group beatdown, Dean is able to get a chinlock on Ahmed to take over. Razor gets in some cheap shots which is rather heelish of him.

Back to who walks into a powerslam but it’s off to Shawn, who Ahmed launches into Dean for two. In a more normal act for Razor, he pops Dean in the face to give Shawn a rollup win. Off to Bulldog vs. Owen which should be a good pairing. Owen hits a sweet spinwheel kick for two and Bulldog is so mad that he tags out to Shawn.

Hart tags out to Razor and it’s time for a rematch from Summerslam 95. JR: “I don’t think they can wrestle each other without a ladder.” They’re tentative to start things off but Shawn throws Razor to the floor, followed by Razor taking Shawn’s head off with a clothesline. They collide in mid-air but Shawn nips up. Razor is like forget that chico and hits the Razor’s Edge out of nowhere. Ahmed makes the save and the fans aren’t sure if they like that.

They collide again…..and then they do it for a third time. Shawn tags in Sid who had his back to the ring for some reason. This is a rematch from a recent Raw and part of an ongoing feud. Razor can barely get up, allowing Sid to pound away at will. Yokozuna tries to get in a cheap shot on Sid but Sid kicks him away. Razor comes back with some right hands and they clothesline each other down. That’s the fourth time something Razor has done something like that in five minutes.

For some reason, Sid goes up (well he is Sycho) and gets slammed back down for two. A one handed chokeslam (looked awesome) puts Razor down but Sid tags in Shawn instead of powerbombing him. Shawn accidentally superkicks Sid but Bulldog breaks up the pin. Not that it matters as Razor covers again a second later and gets the pin. Sid powerbombs Michaels, his own partner, before leaving. Bulldog and Razor are legal at the moment with Bulldog pounding away….or not as Bulldog was just having fun.

Razor and Shawn are both down but Ramon can only get two. Owen gets the tag to beat on Michaels and drops him with a backdrop. Off to Yokozuna for the first time and he destroys Shawn in the corner. Shawn gets whipped upside down in the corner and it’s off to the nerve hold by Yokozuna. It’s not like Yokozuna is flexing or anything but it does look like a nice shoulder to lean on I guess.

Shawn gets up and is promptly elbowed back down. Off to Owen for a double headbutt to put Shawn down again. Owen misses a swan dive and Shawn makes the tag to Ahmed, who cleans house. The yet to be named Pearl River Plunge (Tiger Bomb) pins Owen and it’s off to Razor vs. Ahmed, which would have been a very interesting feud. Razor bulldogs Johnson down and things break down again with Razor beating up all of his opponents.

Ahmed goes to the corner to pose, and he just happens to put himself in Razor’s Edge position. With Ahmed down, Bulldog comes in sans tag. Here come Sid and the 1-2-3 Kid with DiBiase as Razor hits the fall away slam on Bulldog for two. Razor drills the Kid but walks into the powerslam for the elimination. It’s Shawn/Bulldog/Johnson vs. Yokozuna now.

Shawn gets the fat man first but the right hands don’t do much to Yokozuna, who slugs Shawn down with ease. Yokozuna hits the fat man legdrop but opts for the Banzai instead of covering. Shawn, fearing death, avoids the drop and makes the tag to Ahmed. There’s the slam (for the second time) but Bulldog breaks up the pin by his own teammate. Bulldog gets dropped and Shawn superkicks Yokozuna down. A splash from Ahmed (with a SQUEAL) gets the pin and the victory.

Rating: C+. For a match with almost no point behind it and some wacky teams, this was pretty good stuff. The Shawn vs. Razor stuff was interesting as you knew they had chemistry but it was fun to see them without a gimmick. Ahmed looked good but not great here, which would be the right description of him for his entire run in the WWF. Fun match that was never tried again, which I can understand.

More Clinton stuff with Sunny sitting on his lap. Lucky guy.

Bret talks about his previous matches with Diesel, both of which rocked.

Diesel says he’s Jackknifed Bret twice but he’s not sure if he can beat him. Diesel won the first one by DQ and the second was a draw. They were both good matches so this should be good too.

Perfect picks Bret, JR picks Diesel.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Diesel

Diesel is defending and this is No DQ and no countout. Diesel immediately takes a buckle pad off, so Bret takes another one off to match him. Bret charges him into the corner and goes after the leg but Diesel pounds him over the back to take over. The champ knocks Hart to the floor and Bret is limping. Diesel follows him out and hits a HARD ax handle to put Bret down again. It’s a slow start so far but they have a lot of time.

Hart gets sent into the barricade and goes back in but he bails to the floor immediately. Back in and Diesel wins a slugout, knocking Bret to the floor with a big right hand. Diesel whips him into the steps and keeps the pace slow. A theme of the promos had been wearing Bret tiring Diesel out so there’s some good psychology going on here. Diesel puts Bret down with a hard chair shot to the back and Hart is reeling.

Back in and Diesel loads up the Jackknife but Bret keeps grabbing the leg to block it. Now he bites the champ’s hands to escape. The fans are starting to get into this too. Bret goes for the knee and the champ is in trouble. They do the same opening sequence as Bret goes for the knee again but Diesel hits him in the back. This time though, Bret gets him down and cranks on the knee. See, THAT is storytelling.

Perfect says the line that always gets on my nerves: “They’re all the same size on the mat.” JR properly says “the size and power advantage are negated on the mat.” What JR says is true: Diesel is still bigger than Bret on the mat or standing up. Anyway, Bret cannonballs down onto the knee and there’s the Figure Four. Diesel makes the rope but Bret stays on the bad leg.

Hart tries the Sharpshooter but Diesel thumbs him in the eyes before kicking him into the exposed buckle. Bret picks the leg again and wraps it around the post before tying a cord of some kind around the post. He ties the other end of the cord to Diesel’s leg, making the champion a sitting duck. Bret gets a chair but Diesel uses the free leg for a big boot. Diesel crawls for the chair but Bret gets to it first and wears out the knee with chair shots.

With the leg still attached, Bret pulls off the backbreaker. Bret takes the chair to the top but Diesel punches him down to crotch Bret. Hart gets slammed to the mat, giving Diesel the chance to untie his ankle. Diesel chokes Bret with the cord and hits the side slam for two. Diesel sends Bret chest first into the exposed corner and puts him in 619 position for the running crotch attack, but he can’t run because of the bad leg. Instead he jumps into the air and crashes down on Bret, which looks more painful than the running version.

Diesel can barely hit Snake Eyes onto a covered buckle and Bret is in trouble. He tries another one but Bret escapes and rams Diesel into the exposed buckle. A Hart Attack clothesline gets two on the champ and Bret starts his comeback. That would be his second comeback if you’re keeping track. A middle rope clothesline gets two as does a Russian legsweep. Bret clotheslines Diesel to the floor and tries a plancha but Diesel just steps to the side and lets Bret crash.

Bret starts getting back to the apron but Diesel knocks him off, and for the first time ever, through the Spanish Announce Table. They head back inside and Diesel calls for the Jackknife but Bret falls onto his face from exhaustion. Diesel picks him up to try again but BRET IS GOLDBRICKING and rolls Diesel up for the title out of nowhere in a big surprise.

Rating: A. Outstanding match here with both guys looking awesome. It takes the right kind of opponent to get a great match out of Diesel, but when you put a smaller guy like Bret or Shawn in there, the results are almost a guarantee. These two had some classics against each other and this was one of the best ones. I had a blast with this and it worked really well with Bret getting more and more violent and sadistic before faking Diesel out and using a wrestling move to win the title. That’s psychology people, and it’s great.

Diesel snaps post match and lays out Bret and some officials. Bret takes two Jackknifes and Diesel says I’M BACK to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. This was a pleasant surprise as with 1995 you often think of something disappointing but instead this was good almost throughout. The Goldust match was terrible but other than that and arguably the Undertaker match, the rest of this is all solid to quite good stuff. Throw in a new World Champion and there’s not much you can call bad here. Very good show.

Ratings Comparison

BodyDonnas vs. Underdogs

Original: A-

Redo: B

Team Bertha Faye vs. Team Alundra Blayze

Original: D

Redo: C+

Goldust vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: C

Redo: F

Dark Side vs. Royals

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Bret Hart vs. Diesel

Original: C+

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

As close as the previous show was to being the same, this one is almost entirely different, yet it leads to a very similar overall rating. That’s a very interesting thing and one of my favorite things to see in doing this.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/14/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1995-bret-slays-the-giant/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6