On This Day: September 12, 1999 – Fall Brawl 1999: Another Attempt At Turning Sting Heel

Fall Brawl 1999
Date: September 12, 1999
Location: Lawrence Joel Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Attendance: 7,491
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan

Well it’s the last Fall Brawl that I have left here and WCW is in its dying days here. Yes I know they went on for over a year after this but for all intents and purposes they were done in 2000. There’s no cage at all on this show and I don’t think anyone is going to particularly miss it anyway. Anyway other than that there isn’t much to talk about. Hogan vs. Sting for the title is the main event.  Let’s get to it.

Oh and one other thing: Bischoff was legit fired two days before this show, so let’s see what kind of differences we have here.

The opening video is about who you can trust. Not much to say other than that. Hogan says he’s a changed man and all that jazz. Oh and Luger won’t screw them over. He promises.

The announcers say they don’t know who to trust so that’s what makes this very interesting and all that jazz.

Eddie Guerrero/Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman vs. Insane Clown Posse/Vampiro

Oh look: it’s the clowns. For some reason these guys kept getting put on major shows and told they were pro wrestlers so they pretend they are and waste a lot of time. The other team is the Filthy Animals apparently. Rey is unmasked with blonde hair here because that money from his mask sales was just not needed here. LONG stall to start because they’re freaking clowns.

Vampy doesn’t have his face painted which is a very weird look for him. They chill on the floor so we don’t have any of that wrestling stuff. White hot crowd. Ok so it’s Kidman against Shaggy 2 Dope. I hate this already. Kidman lets Shaggy get a shot in to start and Kidman is walking him through everything. A reverse Veg-O-Matic hits Shaggy and it’s off to Eddie.

Off to Rey vs. Violent Jay. He’s the bigger one and the blonde guy so it’s easy to tell them apart. Bronco Buster hits Vampiro and it’s off to Kidman. Since having Vampiro would be the best idea for his team, here’s Jay again. And yes I know it’ssupposed to just be the letter J but screw these idiots. DDT to Kidman and it’s off to Vampiro again. He hits a spinwheel kick off the top for two on Kidman.

The heels double team Kidman as Tony says his hair used to be like Vampiro’s. Vampy chops away and it’s off to Shaggy. You can tell very quickly that the clowns have very limited skill and training. They look like the Tough Enough guys going through spots. Rey’s knee is hurt and if I remember right this is legit.

Vampiro works over Rey for a bit more until it’s off to Eddie. Let the chopping begin! Vampy gets a nice spin kick to take Eddie down as it’s back to the clowns. Shaggy TOTALLY misses a top rope legdrop but gets two anyway. Eddie cleans house but Shaggy and Vampiro hit the absolute worst 3D you will ever see.

Shaggy was doing Bubba’s part and drops Eddie about two feet above the mat, more or less making it a very modified Samoan Drop by Vampiro. GET THESE GUYS OUT OF THE FREAKING RING BEFORE THEY KILL SOMEONE. Everything breaks down and it’s 3-2 due to Rey’s knee injury. The Shooting Star ends Vampiro finally.

Rating: D+. This is one of those matches where you have to praise one set of guys for the good stuff and blame the rest on the others. Point blank: the clowns don’t belong in the ring. They’re not good, they’re not interesting, they’re not wrestlers and they have zero business being out there. That being said, naturally they got time on all four major companies’ shows because someone hates me.

We recap the Cruiserweight Title match which is basically Lenny Lane as a gay guy who is champion defending against Kaz Hayashi who is the flavor of the month.

Cruiserweight Title: Lenny vs. Kaz Hayashi

In what may or may not be a great way to set this up, Kaz was facing Lodi and rolled up Lenny when he interfered to pin him and earn the title shot. Lenny and Lodi are the West Hollywood Blondes now and they’re just flat out gay characters now. Lenny does the stereotypical Rico-style stuff and it’s official that we have a comedy match. Kaz sends him to the floor and Lenny literally jumps into Lodi’s arms like he’s about to be carried over a threshold.

Kaz dives onto them and takes over in the ring. Lenny drops him down and does the whole sexy pin thing. Pretty nice gutwrench powerbomb gets two. Lenny goes to the floor and Kaz hits a huge tope con hilo to take over again. And never mind as Lodi gets a shot in to take over again and give Lenny two. Off to the chinlock to waste some time now.

Kaz gets a rana for two but walks into a bulldog for two. Belly to back shifts the momentum back to Hayashi. This is an awkward match to say the least. Kaz gets a pretty awesome slingshot bulldog for two and sets for his finisher, whatever that is. It’s something off the top apparently. Lenny reverses, only to get caught in a Ligerbomb out of the corner for two. Rana out of the corner gets two. Kaz sends the blondes into each other and gets a victory roll for two. Lodi interferes for two but the distraction is enough to let Lenny hit a Skull Crushing Finale to end it.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t horrible but it was certainly awkward for almost the entire thing. The ending was better but at the same time it was far more like a collection of spots rather than a match. That was a problem for Cruiserweights and with lower level guys like these, that’s not good. Not a terrible match or anything, but just kind of weak. Lenny would be stripped of the title by Turner Sports because they didn’t like his character, resulting in them finally saying Psicosis is champion just because we say so.

Sting comes out to the ring for a full on promo. In short he’s a lone wolf (or is it lobster) and isn’t friends with Luger. Flexy Lexy needs to stay out of the ring tonight so we’ll have him penciled in for run-in #3. Oh and this is business, not personal with Hogan. Say it with me: heel turn.

Brian Knobbs/Hugh Morrus vs. Shane Douglas/Dean Malenko

Pre-match the face team (Douglas/Malenko) do their thing, but Shane says the wrong city and state. Oh dear. Douglas/Malenko are part of the Revolution, which was supposed to be a youth uprising thing but turned into an anti-American thing like a month after this. Knobbs/Morrus are the First Family, which is Jimmy Hart’s very low level stable. This is also No DQ for no apparent reason. Big brawl to start so Dean kicks them both in the balls to take over. Shane comes back in and the Revolution cleans the ring out.

Double baseball slides take out the First Family as this is still a big brawl. The Revolution is sent into various metal objects and something goes flying that we can’t identify. Either way it half kills Shane. We get things down to normal now as Knobbs rubs his armpit in the face of Shane. Shane gets all ticked off and brings in Dean, who has little trouble taking care of Knobbs. Speaking of Knobbs, why in the world is he on PPV in 1999?

Dean works the arm and then the wrist. When you can make a wristlock look freaking sick, that’s a good sign. Off to Morrus and Shane again as this is more or less target practice for the Revolution. Knobbs and Shane go back to the floor for more brawling so back in the ring Shane is tagged in. Tony gets his first stupid line of the match in by saying they’ve kept this in the ring so far. It’s important to mention that it’s the first stupid line because we’ve been on the air about 40 minutes so far.

The Revolution clears the ring again and Shane takes over on Knobbs soon thereafter. Double teaming gets Douglas down so Knobbs gets to go on his, ahem, offense. Middle rope splash eats a foot which looks like it nearly broke Shane’s leg. Double tag with a small pop for Dean, who I think is half of the face team. Dean cleans house….and gets tripped up by Knobbs, allowing Morrus to take over and hit No Laughing Matter to end this. Clean. On PPV. Hugh Morrus pinned Dean Malenko. In 1999. And people wonder why the Radicals happened in four months.

Rating: D. The match was a mess, there seemed to be no po….oh screw it. WHAT THE HECK ARE THEY THINKING??? Dude, why in the world would this be the booking move? I mean really it’s HUGH FREAKING MORRUS and BRIAN KNOBBS going over Shane Douglas and Dean Malenko in 1999. This is so idiotic I can’t even begin to describe it. Dean, please just leave now. It’s not going to get any better, I assure you.

TV Title: Perry Saturn vs. Rick Steiner

Steiner is now a heel and all “rough” or something like that. Oh and the Steiners are all cool again. Steiner is champion and Saturn is in the Revolution. Take a guess as to what happens here. Steiner takes him down to the match rather quickly as we’re told Buff Bagwell isn’t here yet but there’s a replacement for him who will be named later.

Saturn gets his spinning legdrop for no cover. Suicide dive takes out Steiner and Saturn hammers away. No real reason for this match other than Saturn has been deemed a challenger. We touch on the death of referee Mark Curtis (Brian Hilldebrand) who passed away earlier in the week. Everyone is wearing a black armband because of it which is always cool to see.

Out to the floor and Saturn is sent into the steps. Bad DDT on the floor puts Saturn down even more. Other than a brief flourish at the beginning it’s been all Steiner because that’s what he does. I mean, it’s not like he’s going to sell for anyone. That would imply that someone young could be better than him and the people might somehow care about him even less. Perish the thought!

German sends Saturn flying. Off to a chinlock so that Rick can have a little breather. Off to a half crab as this is rather boring indeed. Saturn slaps the mat but we’re not going to call that a tap out because that’s not the planned ending. Back to the half crab which isn’t even cranked on. Basically he’s just got his leg up in the air a bit. Give me a break. Belly to belly gets no cover for Rick.

There’s another belly to belly and Saturn is down. Rick yells at a fan and Saturn is able to get a middle rope dropkick to take Steiner down. T-bone suplex gets two for the former Perry. And never mind that as Steiner takes him down with a powerslam for two. Death Valley Driver, Saturn’s finisher, gets two also. Saturn calls for the Rings of Saturn but instead goes for another DVD which is shrugged off. Steiner Bulldog is broken up but the second attempt hits so Steiner can retain. Give me another break.

Rating: D-. No one, I mean NO ONE, cared about Rick Steiner at this point. Therefore the obvious solution is to give him the TV Title for four months. He would lose it to Benoit the next night, so why in the freaking world wouldn’t you just do the title change here???? Oh that’s right: Benoit has to job to Sid because Heaven knows Sid is the guy that needs the US Title more than Benoit right? I freaking give up.

Here’s Hogan, saying he’s a good guy now and won’t stab anyone in the back. Oh and if anyone wants him, come get him. There are run-ins #1 and #2 for later I presume. The fans chant for Flair, who isn’t here I don’t think.

We recap what was supposed to be Berlyn vs. Bagwell. Berlyn is Alex Wright as a crazy ticked off German with a Mohawk and The Wall (get it?) as his bodyguard. Bagwell didn’t like him so that was your match. Then Bagwell didn’t want to lose and refused to go out to lose. Of course he did. The Berlyn character was delayed due to Columbine, so this was supposed to happen back in the spring.

Berlyn vs. ???

The replacement is Jim Duggan of all people. Berlyn jumps him in the corner and can’t put him down with a dropkick. Duggan starts a comeback after not being on defense for the most part. Clotheslines put Berlyn on the floor. Duggan massacres him for the most part. Remember that this is Berlyn’s debut. Berlyn hits a clothesline, Duggan won’t stay down. They slug it out and Duggan still won’t sell anything.

The fans want Flair and are rather patriotic at the same time. Off to a chinlock which Duggan at least sits still for, at least for a few seconds. Duggan fights up and stays on offense. Seriously, the guy won’t stay down more than like 2 seconds off any move. He does the whole nothing hurts him walk (as opposed to standing there and letting nothing hurt him) and dear goodness help me they’re trying technical stuff.

I think it would be a bit better to go out and watch a bunch of puppies get massacred. This is horrid and somehow gets even more boring. Another chinlock gets us nowhere because Duggan won’t sell anything, not even with facial expressions. Duggan hammers away even more and Wall pulls back the mats on the floor. A HORRIBLE neckbreaker finally ends this. Duggan was going to take it like a Stunner so Berlyn had to say “turn around” to end it. Horrid, horrid match.

Rating: G. As in GO AWAY DUGGAN. This was awful and the majority of that can be blamed on Duggan. If he won’t sell for Berlyn, how in the world can you expect the character to be taken seriously? Terrible match and oddly enough the second time this has happened to Wright.

Bagwell “arrives” and comes out to hug Duggan, who isn’t happy. I’m not either but I’m not getting a paycheck like he is either so there we are.

Video on how Harlem Heat is back together. They were champions again and then the Rednecks got them because that’s how WCW rolls. That of course all happened in less than a month, because WCW decided we needed NINETEEN TITLE CHANGES in 1999.

Tag Titles: Harlem Heat vs. West Texas Rednecks

The Rednecks are Barry and Kendall Windham with Hennig in their corner. They’re country singers and that’s about it. The Windhams are legit brothers. Booker vs. Kendall to start us off and Kendall bails to avoid a spin kick. Heat double teams Kendall and it’s off to Stevie. Now Stevie won’t sell anything. Naturally this is probably going to be praised, because WCW needs more guys to no sell so their other guys look bad right?

Barry comes in to hit a DDT for no cover. How he went from being as totally awesome as he was at one point to being here now is amazing. Odd to see two pairs of brothers here. Actually it isn’t but there isn’t much to talk about here. Hennig gets in a shot to make sure that Kendall can get a two count on Stevie. Stevie gets a powerslam out of nowhere to put Barry down.

Double tag brings in Kendall and Booker with the more famous one doing what he can. Down goes Hennig and Kendall does the same a second after. The double teaming begins on the floor as Booker gets caught. Off to the chinlock on Booker by Kendall as the fans chant for the Heat. That’s better than nothing I guess. Axe kick hits but it would have been a bit better if Kendall had waited until it actually hit to go down.

Spinarooni is broken up by Barry and it’s back to the floor for Booker. More double teaming continues and it’s back in to Barry. Barry gets a middle rope superplex (his old finisher) but Stevie makes the save. If this sounds really boring, I’m getting better at this emotion thing in the writing. Kendall gets a lariat mostly to the neck for two. Booker gets his sunset flip out of the corner for two.

The heels double team a lot, as you would expect from a team with an old school guy like Barry. There’s a sleeper to Barry as this is probably on the verge of ending. Back off to Kendall who hits a weak middle rope clothesline for one. Classic old school spot as the referee misses the hot tag. Stevie beats up everyone anyway and everything breaks down. Hennig hits Ray in the head with a cowbell but the referee won’t count BECAUSE HE WAS PAYING ATTENTION!!!! WOW!!!!! Booker is still legal so the missile dropkick he hits gets the tag titles back.

Rating: D+. Match was weak but this is a fine sign of what Bischoff not being around means: the ending made perfect sense for a change and was actually kind of creative. No one cared about the match though, because we had seen it just a few weeks ago on Nitro. Nothing of note at all, as you could say about most matches tonight.

Recap of Benoit vs. Sid. Sid was doing the whole imitating Goldberg’s Streak deal and Benoit challenged him. Benoit is US Champion and part of the Revolution. You figure out what’s going to happen here.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Sid Vicious

Oh and Revolution’s theme song is a cover of The Beautiful People by Marilyn Manson. Just to hammer in WCW’s refusal to push young guys, Benoit and Malenko were having a #1 contenders match so Sid ran in to make it a no contest. He’s 79-0 at this point, with wins coming through means such as just chokeslamming people and not pinning them, beating people up in brawls and beating people up despite losing the match by countout or something like that. Go figure.

Sid throws Benoit around a lot and then stalls. Benoit gets tossed even more and then, like a good ring general, goes for the knee of a bigger man. Makes perfect sense right? He gets a dragon screw, a dropkick to the knee, some cannonballs down onto the knee and an Indian Deathlock in the span of about a minute. After all that, Sid popped up and was completely fine. It’s going to be one of those matches.

Sid stomps away in the corner with his knee being just fine. Benoit avoids a charge and goes to the floor, wrapping the leg around the post and then putting it between the steps and post, dropkicking the steps into the leg twice. That’s an attack that would put some guys out for weeks. Ok so to be clear: SID’S LEG SHOULD BE HURT. Back into the ring and Sid is able to catch Benoit flying through the air in a cross body. Benoit counters into a German and Sid flat out will not sell the knee at all.

Samoan Drop and the knee is still perfectly fine. Oh NOW he limps a bit, after destroying Benoit. By a bit I mean he kicks the ropes a few times and it perfectly fine. There’s a Cobra Clutch into a slam by Sid. That gets two so Sid hammers away on him and it’s off to the chinlock. The fans get distracted by something as Sid FINALLY starts to limp. You know, after he threw Benoit all over the place.

Sid goes for some power move but Benoit reverses and gets his feet up in the corner. Back to the knee and there’s the Crossface. Now as I’m sure you know, there’s a simple way of communicating that you want to submit and end the match: you slap the mat multiple times. This is commonly known as tapping out. SID SLAPS THE MAT TWICE. However that doesn’t count despite the referee looking straight at him and being maybe 5 inches from Sid’s tapping hand.

Benoit is TICKED as Sid stands up while the hold is still on and drags Benoit to the ropes. Remember the hold is on and Sid is on his feet. Gee it’s a good thing his legs are in such great shape isn’t it? Benoit goes up, Swan Dive misses and Sid casually moves out of the way and then snaps off a powerbomb with his arm and knee being just fine as he wins the US Title. Benoit would get the TV Title the next night and a WWF contract four months later as a result.

Rating: F. This stands for failure, because that’s what this was. First and foremost let me make this clear: Benoit did nothing wrong here. Not a thing. His psychology was good (take the big man off his feet), his offense was good (variety of attacks), his emotion was good, everything he did made sense and worked fine.

Then on the other hand we have Sid. This is the epitome of the problem with WCW and arguably the main reason they went under: Sid could have gone out there and tap danced for the 12 minutes this match had while Benoit put on the wrestling clinic of a lifetime and Sid’s push would have continued while Benoit would have been pushed back down the card. The reason for this being that Sid has been decided to be one of the “it” guys. He’s 39 here (Benoit was 32), he will not sell the knee making Benoit more or less a pointless jobber here, and he can’t do anything special in the ring at all.

And yet he’s going to get pushed. Why is that you ask? Because someone in WCW decided he would with no reason other than Sid gets pushed. Benoit was put in the list of people that weren’t getting pushed and that was that. So in other words, there’s no point for the young guys to try hard because it’s not going to get them anywhere. Sid of course would go on to be pushed even harder, winning the world title in January while Benoit thankfully left for the WWF. This match is a lot sadder than it sounds because Benoit is trying but Sid just won’t cooperate, which makes his push all the stupider.

We recap DDP vs. Goldberg with Page as the heel, working with the original Jersey Triad. Page beat Goldberg with a chair and that’s about it.

Goldberg vs. Diamond Dallas Page

This is more or less a midcard match because Goldberg had his time so it’s time for the REAL draws in the form of old Sting and old Hogan to run things here. So just to be clear here, Goldberg is 32 years old and has one loss against roughly 240 wins in his WCW career. He’s ridiculously popular and here he is in a midcard feud. Seriously, I want to know: how did WCW make money at one point?

The referee checks them for objects and finds a chain on Page. Page shoves the referee away and drops a roll of half dollars. Ok that was funny. Page is knocked to the floor quickly and comes back in for a feeling out process, only to get knocked all over the place for his efforts. Page is knocked to the floor again as it doesn’t seem like they know what their plan is here, which is unheard of for a Page match.

Page gets a shot in as Goldberg comes in again but can’t get the Diamond Cutter. Powerslam gets no cover for Goldberg. Page pulls out a third object which the referee didn’t find to hammer Billy Boy in the head and take over. The fans LOUDLY chant for Goldberg and pop even louder when he gets in some punches. Page drills him with the object again and the referee is cool with it I guess.

Off to the chinlock on the mat as Page cheats even more which this referee somehow still can’t see. I know the joke is that they’re blind but how can you manage to believe this isn’t being seen? Goldberg Goldbergs Up and even hits a big boot to complete the joke. Page gets a horrible jumping tornado DDT to get two and break the momentum though which is kind of surprising actually.

Another weapon shot sets up a spinning Rock Bottom for two. Here’s the rest of the Triad to cheat and that doesn’t work. Spear and Jackhammer end this like three seconds later. Oh and the last weapon shot made Goldberg legit bleed from the neck. Freaking ow man. Well at least it’s over I guess.

Rating: D. Remember when Page was one of the most awesome things in the world and more or less couldn’t be beaten? This is nothing like that. Page as a heel is awful, especially when he’s getting destroyed by someone like Goldberg. This was a weak match all around and no one bought that Page had a chance at all, which he didn’t.

We recap Sting vs. Hogan. Hogan says he’s a new man (despite being the old version of him) and then Luger says he has proof that Hogan is lying through his teeth. There was a Hummer that was trying to run Nash over a few months earlier and no one knew who was driving it (despite Sting being seen in the driver’s seat of it at one point) so Luger says it was Hogan (despite this Hummer being white and the original one being black). This would go nowhere, despite it being implied that Sid was revealed as the driver earlier in the year. It would be touched on AGAIN in April when it was implied it was Bischoff driving.

Anyway, Sting was found out cold on the floor and Luger blamed Hogan, despite Hogan swearing it wasn’t him. This is actually a lot more like the angle in 1995 that got dropped because Hogan got bored with it I guess and went back to fighting the Dungeon of Doom and the Horsemen until Hall debuted. Not that it matters or anything but Buffer takes forever to do an intro and I need something to pass the time.

WCW World Title: Sting vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan is champion and is in red and yellow while Sting is kind of a tweener. They shake hands before the match and you can feel Sting’s heel turn coming. Here’s Bret before the match starts, wanting to wish them luck. He couldn’t do this as they come past the Gorilla Position? He actually leaves without doing anything. Thanks for wasting about two minutes there Bret.

They lock up on the ropes and the referee has to split them up. Hogan grabs a rollup for one. They actually wrestle a bit, blowing the minds of everyone. It’s slow but it’s not horrible I guess. Hogan takes him into the corner and strikes away a lot in a variety of methods. A pair of elbow drops gets two. Hogan gets a suplex which is no sold by Sting.

They hit the floor and it’s Hogan in control still. Why do I have a feeling this is Bound For Glory this year (2011)? He takes Sting down and drops more elbows, only for Sting to send him into the railing to take over. Back into the ring and Hogan hits a belly to back suplex for two. Off to a surfboard as Sting is in some trouble here. There’s an abdominal stretch to crank up the difficulty.

There’s a back rake by Hogan as this is going so slowly and no one in the building believes there’s going to be a clean ending. Ten punches in the corner set up some biting of Sting’s cranial area. Sting gets a cross body for two. A pair of Stinger Splashes hit out of nowhere but the third one misses and it’s Hulk Up time.

He hits the big boot and leg but here’s DDP to deck the referee and Diamond Cut Hogan, which only gets two. Diamond Cutter for the referee and Hogan stares DDP down but here’s Bret Hart to take out Page. Everyone but Hogan goes to the floor and here’s Sid who is sent out quickly. Luger is here with a ball bat but Hogan gets him too. Sting gets the bat and Hogan says Luger was the one. Sting drills Hogan with the bat to a huge face pop and the Scorpion gives Sting the win over the unconscious Hogan. That was supposed to be a heel turn but the standing ovation seems to make that feel like a failure.

Rating: D. They tried to wrestle and then proved why they shouldn’t be doing that. The whole thing didn’t work for the most part and the heel turn at the end was downright hilarious because no one wanted Sting as a heel. The people flat out aren’t going to boo him and it’s a waste of time to get them to try. This was another example of WCW having no idea what to do with the world title and it failing completely. This went nowhere and Sting would lose the title next month.

Overall Rating
: F. Failure on all levels here as there weren’t any good matches, the ending sucked for the most part and they managed to bury an entire group in one night. Anyway, this whole show didn’t work, much like the entirety of 1999. The company was more or less dead at this point so they were trying whatever they could to make things work, such as turning Sting heel, which wasn’t going to work at all. Anyway, horrible show, much like the rest of the year was.

 

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Monday Nitro – April 20, 1998: I Don’t Care If You’ve Heard This One Before

Monday Nitro #136
Date: April 20, 1998
Location: World Arena, Colorado Springs, Colorado
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko

It’s the night after Spring Stampede and some things have changed. To begin with Savage is the new world champion having defeated Sting with the help of Kevin Nash. This of course turned into yet another Hogan story as Hogan tried to keep the title on Sting but Nash helped take it off of him to screw over Hogan who hit Nash with a baseball bat earlier in the night. Other than that Raven won the US Title last night and gets Goldberg as a reward tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with exclusive footage from after the PPV where Hogan and Disciple jumped Savage and Nash but the NWO B Team came out to prevent Hogan from taking the belt.

Opening sequence.

The announcers talk about the title picture.

Here are Hogan, Disciple and Bischoff to open the show because it’s not like there’s a new world champion who should be opening things up. Bischoff ensures us that he loves Hogan who loves all of you. Hogan says the NWO is for life and thinks Nash and Savage are caught in the river Styx. There’s no escape for Savage tonight because the NWO is watching all the exits.

The fans are all over Hogan to the point where I can barely understand him. Hogan wants to call out Savage tonight and he’ll take care of Nash too. The NWO has split and it’s time to find out who is going to follow whom and if Nash tries to get involved, Hogan will take him apart too.

Goldberg is getting ready.

The announcers talk about what Hogan said while adding nothing new at all.

Here’s Savage for the rebuttal. He’s wants to fight instead of gloat because the only coward here tonight is Hollywood Hogan. The worst kept secret in the world is that he hates Hogan in life and death. See, Hogan has everyone snowed. Hogan’s main goal was to keep Savage from taking over but now his world is crashing down around him.

It was Hogan behind the wheel of the Viper a few weeks ago but now there’s nothing preventing Savage from fighting Hogan tonight. No one can stop him on live TV, including Bischoff, Turner or the big Macho Man in the sky. Savage brings out Nash, calling him the new leader of the NWO. Shouldn’t the new WORLD CHAMPION be the leader?

Here’s Nash, not even in an NWO shirt. He says that this is the end of Hogan’s career because the NWO is no longer his, brother. Tonight Savage is going to be the end of Hogan when he beats him for the title. Nash is coming for Disciple and Bischoff too, because he’s powerbombed Eric before and he’ll do it again.

The announcers talk even more.

Raven says he won’t be #75 for Goldberg because he’s been through pain before.

Nitro Girls. We’re only half an hour into the show before the first match so why not have even more filler?

Gene tells us to call the Hotline for the latest rumors about nothing in particular.

Konnan vs. Chris Adams

Yep, this is what we waited thirty minutes to get to. Adams takes over with some quick suplexes and armdrags Konnan down to counter Konnan’s technical attempts. Another armdrag sends Konnan to the floor for a conference with Vincent. Back in and Konnan hits the low dropkick and a hard clothesline before cranking on the arm. Adams fights up and tries Kofi Kingston’s SOS for two but crashes into the ropes on a cross body attempt. The Tequila Sunrise gets the submission for Konnan.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as neither guy is anything of note at this point. Konnan is nothing more than a lackey with an accent and Adams is a jobber that most of WCW’s fans likely haven’t heard of. The announcers didn’t help things either by spending the entire match talking about Goldberg. If they want to get back on top in the ratings, this is a strange way of going about it.

Nitro Party video.

Barbarian vs. Wayne Bloom

Barbarian pounds him into the corner to start but Wayne comes back with a clothesline. Jimmy Hart distracts Bloom, allowing Barbie to get the pin off a big boot. Match might have lasted a minute.

Raven says he’s next.

Here’s Chris Jericho, wearing Iaukea’s skirt thing, with a portrait of Dean Malenko. Jericho has some good news and bad news. The bad news is that Malenko is retired, but the good news is he has a job interview at Harry’s Burgers in Tampa. Jericho will give us updates on how the interview goes.

Cruiserweight Title: Chris Jericho vs. Juventud Guerrera

Juvy pounds away in the corner and snaps off a top rope hurricanrana. Off to a quick chinlock but Jericho comes back with a jawbreaker and does his long strut. Juvy avoids a charge to send Jericho to the floor and a big plancha takes Chris down again. Back in and a springboard spinwheel kick gets two. Juvy rolls up Jericho’s body into a DDT for two more as this is incredibly fast paced for the most part. Juvy tries another hurricanrana but gets caught in the Liontamer, eventually passing out from the pain, playing up the Never Surrender idea.

Rating: C+. They packed a lot of action into a three and a half minute match. Juvy continues to be one of the best fliers around and Jericho is more than capable of hanging in there with him when he tries to. It says a lot when you can have a crowd going nuts in the first minute and a half of a match which is exactly what Juvy had them doing here on those near falls.

Jericho: “MY GOD I KILLED JUVY!”

Goldberg is still getting ready.

Hour #2 begins.

US Title: Goldberg vs. Raven

Raven is defending and this is under his rules. He lays the belt out in front of Goldberg and they talk trash, only to have Raven dropkick him down. We head to the floor with Raven being whipped into the barricade to give Goldberg control. Back inside and Goldie puts on a leg lock before superkicking Raven right back to the floor.

Raven grabs a chair and smashes Goldberg in the back to slow him down. There’s the drop toehold onto the chair followed by a reverse chinlock on Goldberg. The big man powers up and no sells a bunch of right hands. There’s the spear but Goldberg has to destroy the Flock. Raven tries to leave but the fans throw him back to ringside. Another spear and a Jackhammer onto a stop sign (brought in by Horace) make Goldberg US Champion.

Rating: C+. Total destruction here by Goldberg which is a good idea, but I don’t know why it had to be at Raven’s expense just one day after he won the title. The guy did some great work with Page and Benoit earlier in the year but now he gets to keep the US Title for a single day? Still though, good, hard hitting match here.

More Nitro Girls.

La Parka vs. Ultimo Dragon

La Parka does his dance to start but Dragon takes him by the arm and sends him down with a flying mare. Dragon avoids a charge into the corner but a spinwheel kick sends him to the floor. La Parka hits a big dive to the floor before throwing on a chinlock back in the ring. A clothesline gets two on Dragon but La Parka goes up top and dives into some boots from Dragon. Eddie Guerrero is dragging Chavo to the ring by the neck as Dragon fires off the kicks. Chavo is forced to shove Dragon off the top, allowing La Parka to hit a twisting body attack off the top for the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine with both guys looking good for the most part and tying it into the Guerrero story could be interesting. It’s a good sign thing to have so many talented guys you can throw out there to have solid matches and giving them a story makes things even better. Nice little match here.

We look at some stills from the main event last night.

Chris Benoit vs. Curt Hennig

Rude jumps in on commentary as is customary anymore. Benoit jumps Hennig as he comes to the ring and goes after Curt’s banged up knee. Hennig tries to take it to the mat which goes about as well as you would expect against Chris Benoit. Rude comes down to ringside as Benoit kicks Hennig’s leg out. Hennig sends Benoit to the floor for a beating from Rude, leaving Benoit out cold. Back in and Hennig loads up the HennigPlex, only to have Benoit counter into the Crossface. Rude comes in for the DQ because the NWO isn’t allowed to lose.

Rude beats up Benoit some more but Booker T makes the save. Benoit yells at Booker for helping him, triggering a fight on the stage.

Come to the Power Plant! You can be told you have no future in the business like Dave Batista!

More stills from the main event.

Here’s Roddy Piper with something to say. Piper sucks up to the University of Colorado a bit while talking about something starting at Spring Stampede tonight. The main event is now No DQ, no one allowed at ringside and they’ll fight until there’s a winner.

More stills from the main event. They’ve pretty much given up on the practice of not saying who wins the PPV matches until the replay was over.

Hammer vs. Perry Saturn

The brawl starts in the aisle with Saturn taking over. Hammer is sent into the steps and we finally head inside. A top rope clothesline puts Hammer down again but he pops up to catch Saturn in a powerslam. Saturn suplexes him down a few times but a Thesz Press is countered into something resembling an Alabama Slam from Hammer. Saturn gets a breather though as Hammer seems to have hurt his knee so a Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor. Instead of going after the knee, Saturn crushes Hammer’s arm between the steps and the post. They fight up the aisle for a countout.

Rating: D. This was more of an angle than a match which barely lasted long enough to be rated. Saturn continues to be awesome with his unique style but he needs something better than Hammer to make this work. They did the right thing by keeping it short though as Saturn’s rebellion against Raven begins.

More stills from the main event. Just show the match already if you’re going to show this many shots from the match.

Hour #3 begins.

The announcers talk even more.

Public Enemy vs. Scott Steiner/Buff Bagwell

Bagwell starts with Grunge and it’s already time to pose. A quick armdrag takes Grunge down and it’s time for the posing strut. Grunge comes back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker before it’s off to Rocco vs. Steiner. Scott easily throws Rock around but gets caught in a sleeper. A belly to belly suplex gets Scott out of trouble as the slow power offense continues. Rocco comes back with a swinging neckbreaker before it’s back to Buff for some choking.

Back to Grunge who gets caught in a Tree of Woe for choking by Steiner as the offense continues to expand. Buff heads to the floor but gets caught by some double teaming to give Grunge a breather. Everything breaks down with Grunge hitting a double bulldog on the NWO. Buff is laid out on the table but gets up before Rocco can drive him through. Back in and Scott gets up the Recliner but Buff wants the Blockbuster instead for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was pretty dull stuff. At the end of the day Public Enemy wasn’t a very interesting team because they didn’t have much to offer in WCW besides the table stuff. Scott continues to seem tentative at best on offense instead of being a killing machine like he was in the early days of the Steiner Brothers which made him a star.

Nitro Girls.

TV Title: Psychosis vs. Booker T

Booker takes him down with a back elbow and it’s off to an early armbar. A clothesline and some chops have Psychosis in trouble but he comes back with a dropkick to the chest and one to the leg for good measure. Psychosis gets two off a top rope spinning body attack and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Booker hits a knee to the ribs to stop Psychosis cold. Booker’s knee drop misses so Psychosis wraps the knee around the post to keep him down. Not that it matters as Booker pops up and hits the snap spinebuster. The flapjack sets up a sidekick and the missile dropkick retains the title.

Rating: D+. This felt like they were trying to fill in nine minutes instead of having an entertaining and competitive match. I didn’t leave much out of the match and it somehow ran over nine minutes. There was nothing to see here and they didn’t even let Psychosis fly around the ring all that much. Also Booker completely ignored the knee work near the end which made it even worse.

Bryan Adams vs. Lex Luger

Feeling out process to start with Luger ducking right hands and scoring with an atomic drop. Lex pounds away in the corner and clotheslines Adams down a few times. A third clothesline puts Bryan on the floor and Luger suplexes him back in, only to have a splash (from Luger?) hit knees. Adams gets two off a gorilla press but Luger comes back with a neckbreaker, expanding his moveset yet again. A powerslam puts Adams down, drawing in Vincent for a torture rack. Konnan comes in and gets a rack of his own but there’s still no DQ. Luger drops Konnan and hits a running clothesline on Adams for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was even less interesting than the previous match with Adams and Luger doing nothing of note for the entire match. I have no idea why Adams is getting this prominent of a role but he’s not showing he deserves it. This show is really dragging before the main event and I doubt Hogan vs. Savage is going to raise the bar very much.

The announcers talk about how great the main event will be.

WCW World Title: Hollywood Hogan vs. Randy Savage

No DQ. Hogan threatens to use his Viper to make Savage a speed bump after winning the title. We get the required stalling to start as Hogan hides behind Disciple, ignoring Piper’s statement that no one would be allowed at ringside. Hogan slowly gets in and is taken down by an early shoulder block. After even more stalling Hogan comes back with right hands and some rakes to various body parts. Savage gets choked in the corner by both Hogan and Disciple and a belly to back suplex gets two for the challenger.

We head to the floor for some chair shots to Savage’s….knee I think but it also grazed the shoulder. Hogan pounds away against the barricade before head head back inside. Savage gets in some right hands of his own but injures his knee while kicking Hogan in the ribs. Take notes Booker. Hogan goes after the leg for a few moments but Savage gets in a low blow. He’s too beaten down to follow up so we head to the floor again.

Nothing happens there so it’s back inside for some choking with the weightlifting belt. Savage is reeling and there’s the slam to set up the leg drop but the champion rolls away. Now Savage gets the weightlifting belt and whips Hogan to the biggest reaction of the last hour and a half. Savage slams him down and drops the elbow but the knee prevents him from covering.

Off to a spinning toe hold into a figure four by Hogan to make Savage scream. The fans immediately turn to the entrance to look for the interference a funny moment. Savage makes the rope pretty easily as Dusty Rhodes would have laughed at how badly Hogan had the hold on.

Randy gets up and throws the referee down so he can choke Hogan even more. Disciple comes in for the Stunner on Nick Patrick and goes after Savage’s knee. The fans look to the entrance again but no one is coming yet. Savage’s knee is wrapped around the post and there’s a Stunner with the belt on Disciple’s shoulder.

Now we get Kevin Nash but Bischoff follows him and grabs his leg, allowing Hogan and Disciple to beat Nash down. Hogan’s belt shot hits Nash in the head and Nash jackknifes Hollywood. He drapes Savage on Hogan but here’s Bret Hart to hit Nash with the belt and put Hogan on top of Savage for the pin and the title.

Rating: D-. Where do I even start? We’ll go with the obvious: the match wasn’t all that good. It went on longer than it should have, though to be fair Hogan going after the knee made sense so there was a basic story being told out there. Other than that though, there wasn’t anything good going on.

To begin with, we had three interferences after Piper guaranteed none. Obviously Piper was watching the match but he didn’t do anything about his rules being broken, making him look like an inept figurehead. Granted that might be better than being a crazy rambling psycho who made no sense whatsoever.

Then after all that there’s the booking. We have two stupid points here. Bret’s turn is the easier one to deal with. No it makes no sense, but there’s still a chance to fix things later on with an explanation. At the end of the day though, there was no build to the turn, no teasing of anything, it goes against everything Bret and Hogan have been saying for weeks and it’s not like Bret has been doing anything of note leading up to the match anyway which takes away from the turn a bit.

Then there’s the bigger problem: Hogan as champion AGAIN. He’s held the title for nearly last year and a half save for five days. The idea has been done, but we get to see it yet again for no apparent reason whatsoever. The fans were going nuts for Savage and then just died for the title change. WCW’s fans were tired of Hogan because it’s the same thing they’ve seen for nearly four years now. Is it any wonder why the people changed the channel over to Raw to see something fresh like Austin on top?

The show isn’t quite over.

Piper finally comes out to yell at Bret as there are four bodies piled up on the mat. Bret decks Piper to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Nitro continues on the same track as always: some decent stuff but the NWO nonsense drags it down. At the end of the day, people are sick of Hogan and whatever he has going on at the moment. Nash vs. Hogan could be interesting, but we’re almost two years into the NWO era now and while they’re splitting up, it’s just putting even more focus onto them. Now on the other side we have Goldberg who is finally pushed up to a higher level and given something of note. There’s good stuff hidden under all the nonsense here but there’s way more nonsense than good.

The next week of shows are kind of weird. Thunder is on Wednesday this week and next week Nitro will be split in two. Monday will have an hour long show and Tuesday will have two hours, I believe due to basketball. I’ll be reviewing both Nitros at once.

 

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Monday Nitro – August 17, 1998: An Old Painted Face

Monday Nitro #150
Date: August 17, 1998
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 12,655
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

This was requested a long time ago so I’m not sure why someone wanted to see it. We’re a little over a week after Road Wild 1998 where, believe it or not, the world champion Goldberg didn’t main event the show because Hogan was in a tag match with a celebrity. The company is starting to reel from the Attitude Era but tonight may be their answer if my memory is correct. Let’s get to it.

Here’s the NWO, led by Hogan and Bischoff, to open things up. Giant is part of the NWO again at this point too. Hogan says all the fans here are NWO Black and White fans because this is the house that Hollywood built. He’s sick of all the games with the media and dealing with all those lower level guys. Instead he wants Goldberg right here tonight in the middle of the ring because there is NO ONE he hasn’t beaten and no one he can’t beat. The fans chant Goldberg as Hogan says Giant will take out Goldberg and hand him the title tonight.

Opening sequence which is still the same as it was at the beginning of the year. Even the Steiner Brothers are still in it.

JJ Dillon talks about the very stupid WarGames this year which is a three team, nine man format because the greatest gimmick match of all time needed to be tweaked. Dillon announced Hogan, DDP and Nash as the captains for the three teams. There are three men to start, every two minutes there’s a three way coin toss and the person who earns the fall (which can be a pin this year) gets a title shot at Halloween Havoc.

We get a clip from Saturday Night with Dean Malenko wanting to reform the Horsemen.

Nitro Girls.

Nitro Party winner. Is there any wrestling coming anytime soon?

Steve McMichael vs. Sick Boy

The announcers spend the first minute or so running down Raw for the night because it was taped weeks in advance and their world title match only runs about ten seconds tonight. That’s likely because it’s two weeks before Summerslam and the WWF isn’t stupid enough to air a long title match that close to their second biggest show of the year. Mongo shoves Sick Boy to the apron but gets his neck snapped across the top rope. Sick Boy fires off some right hands and gets two off a slam.

A dropkick puts Mongo down for the same as the announcers talk about Saturn vs. Raven at Fall Brawl with the future of the Flock on the line. Sick Boy hits a clothesline as this is almost a squash so far. They slug it out from their knees with Sick Boy maintaining control but barely being able to get Mongo up for a suplex. Mongo gets in a shot to the ribs and a three point shoulder block followed by the tombstone for the pin.

Rating: C-. I miss the days when Mongo was nowhere to be seen. You know something? I don’t think I’ve ever seen a bad Sick Boy match. The guy looks smooth out there and very confident in what he does in the ring but after the Flock broke up he was more or less gone for good. Then again it’s WCW so it’s not like he would have been pushed anyway.

Here’s DDP with something to say. He’s the captain for Team WCW at Fall Brawl so he went out west to recruit his first teammate. This man wants to take out Hogan as much as Page does and Hogan has never beaten him. Page doesn’t name the guy before starting to talk about the NWO beating Page down before his US Title match with Bret Hart.

This brings out US Champion Bret (in a Hogan shirt) to say quick complaining and win or lose like a man. Page says back up of him Jack because he wants a match with Hart tonight. Bret lists off a bunch of guys that he’s crippled and put on the shelf, but Page is the scum of the earth so he’ll give Page the title shot tonight.

Gene brings out Raven for a chat but before anything can be said, Horace Hogan comes out with a stop sign. He says he’s watched Raven’s back for four months but hasn’t gotten anything in return for it. For the last two weeks he’s beaten Raven up but he wants one more match.

Raven says fine as long as it’s a tag match where he can pick the partners. Horace will have Kanyon and Raven gets Saturn because Saturn needs to get used to being subservient to him. Saturn and Kanyon come out with Saturn calling Raven crazy. He changes his mind a few seconds later because he wants to smack Raven when he comes over for a tag. JJ Dillon comes out to stop this interesting idea. The tag match can happen, but if Saturn tries to attack Raven, he’s gone for 90 days. Also the match must end by pinfall or submission.

High Voltage vs. Alex Wright/Disco Inferno

Wright is quickly taken to the mat by a wristlock and a belly to belly suplex. Tony rips on Raw again by saying WCW will give you action you want to see here tonight. So far we’ve seen Steve McMichael vs. Sick Boy and this classic. You might want to try that one again Schiavone. Off to Disco who is thrown around as well but here’s Meng to attack Wright because Meng is a monster.

A referee and a security guard get Death Grips as well. They finally mace him to no effect at all.

Eddie Guerrero is scheduled for a match against Konnan but he comes out with a bag and a cup of coffee. He says don’t go to a commercial or he’ll say this on another show. Eddie wants to talk to Eric Bischoff about business, but if this is the only way to get his attention then so be it. Eddie has been unappreciated for a year despite giving the best effort he can.

All of the young talent in WCW is held down for the sake of the people on top of the company. The fans are loudly booing. Eddie says he hasn’t done this for the sake of Chavo and his children and pours coffee on himself, referencing a meeting where Eric allegedly threw coffee on him (in his book Eddie said that it was actually Eric accidentally spilling the coffee on a table and it landed on Eddie). This would eventually lead to the LWO. I’m sure we’ll get Eddie vs. Konnan later though, because WCW would NEVER bait and switch us like that other company that WCW has spent the first hour running down.

Hour #2 begins.

Kanyon/Horace vs. Saturn/Raven

Raven and Saturn get in an argument before the bell but agree to get inside. Saturn and Kanyon get things going but Raven tags himself in, nearly triggering another brawl. The tag doesn’t count for some reason so Kanyon tries a fisherman’s suplex on Saturn, only to get caught in a belly to belly suplex. Off to Horace who catches Saturn in a bad looking flapjack, giving Kanyon a two count.

Kanyon stomps away in the corner and gets two off a backbreaker. In a surprise, Raven crotches Kanyon on the top to save Saturn as the Raw bashing continues. Raven comes in and rolls some Russian legsweeps on Kanyon but doesn’t cover. Back to Saturn for some kicks in the corner before Raven brings in a chair.

Kanyon is sat on the middle rope and Raven loads up a Diamond Cutter onto the chair (Tony: “Looked like a bulldog or a DDT.” So not only does he brag about how AMAZING WCW’s main event will be but he doesn’t recognize the most over move in the company for the last year and a half.) but Kanyon shoves Raven into the chair instead. Off to Horace who is only here to beat up Raven. A powerslam gets two for Hollywood Hogan’s nephew as Saturn makes the save.

Everything breaks down and Saturn and Raven are thrown into each other. Horace splashes both guys in the corner and Saturn does the Sting falling low blow spot. A powerbomb/neckbreaker combo gets two on Saturn and Kanyon spikes him down with a reverse electric chair (meaning Saturn was dropped face first off Kanyon’s shoulders). Horace brings in the stop sign but blasts Kanyon by mistake, allowing Saturn to hit the Death Valley Driver on Horace for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was a better match than I was expecting though more dissension between Raven and Saturn would have helped a bit. Kanyon continues to be solid in the ring with a bunch of nifty moves but Horace on the other hand was as generic of a big man as you could ask for. Still though, good stuff here.

The Flock comes in post match and Raven DDTs Saturn. He tells the Flock to get Saturn up but Kidman pulls Raven off of him, earning a DDT of his own. Horace gets a DDT as well.

Here’s the NWO Black and Red (the Wolfpack) with something to say. The Wolfpack is Nash, Konnan, Sting (looking like a lobster in red paint) Luger and Savage (injured at the moment). They’re the cool NWO and formed a few months ago because if there was one thing missing in WCW, it was a face NWO team. Sting talks about WarGames coming up and how much he’d love to be involved again. Konnan does his usual schtick before Nash talks about how great it is to be in Connecticut. If you’re not part of the Wolfpack, prepare to be hunted by the Pack…and that’s it.

Scott Norton vs. Scott Putski

Putski is wearing a long coat that makes him look like a pirate. Norton chops him in the corner to start but Putski comes back with a neckbreaker. A Vincent distraction lets Norton snap off a powerslam and a powerbomb ends Putski in less than a minute.

Here’s the Black and White with something else to say. Hogan loves the new WarGames rules because he can take care of all the garbage at one time. Nash is a turncoat and Page is a creep who doesn’t follow the rules. Bischoff is the boss around here and the man that brings in the new talent, even though there’s no one Page could bring in that Hogan can’t handle. There go the lights and it’s time for the reveal of DDP’s surprise partner.

A voiceover says something about destruction and someone walks out but we can’t see who it is. The lights come up and it’s the Ultimate Warrior (just called the Warrior here). Hogan immediately panics because he thought Warrior was dead. A LOUD Warrior chant comes up as Warrior asks who holds the power now. Warrior stands there for awhile before saying people anticipated his arrival. Hogan offers him the NWO shirt off his back but Warrior says it doesn’t smell good.

Warrior talks about how wrestling has tried to recreate something which is recreateable with Hogan at the figurehead. Those sort of things are irreplaceable and Hogan must realize that right now. Warrior pauses for about thirty seconds after each sentence. The fans chant that Hogan sucks but Warrior wants to tell him something he doesn’t know. Warrior talks about history teaching us things but Hogan has misplaced pieces of his history. He mentions that Hogan never beat the Warrior, which brings up an interesting point.

On Warrior’s WWE DVD, Hogan said this was the ultimate no-no. Why? Some of the biggest matches of all time, including the most watched match in American history, have been rematches. Are we supposed to say Warrior lost the match? Also remember that Page brought it up earlier in the show and flat out said it instead of implying it like Warrior did (Warrior said Hogan never beat him, not that he beat Hogan). Earlier Hogan mentioned wanting to get his belt back from Goldberg. Are we supposed to forget that Hogan lost his only match against Goldberg? I never got why this was such a big deal in Hogan’s mind.

Anyway Warrior says he defeated the undefeatable and conquered the unconquerable because while Hogan was great, Warrior was Ultimate. After talking for about ten minutes, Warrior introduces himself to Disciple, saying that must be Hogan’s barber. I believe that’s the first actual confirmation that it’s Brutus Beefcake. Bischoff says Warrior knows who he is and Warrior says if Bischoff gets involved, it will lead to his demise. Also Warrior is going to send him a bill for something that isn’t specified.

Warrior talks about destiny and waiting for the next superhero. Hogan has been rationalizing adolescent behavior and embodies intolerable evil. Warrior isn’t here to beat Hogan up because everyone has already beaten Hogan up. Nice line there. Next week Warrior is going to launch a revolution that not even Hogan can control. That’s next week, same Warrior time, place and channel. Seriously he said that. Smoke fills the ring and Warrior disappears.

This went on FOREVER and easily could have been cut in half to get the same point across. Between Warrior’s incessant pauses, the repeating the same stuff in different terms over and over and talking to Bischoff about bills, this could have been cut down to about six or seven minutes instead of the fifteen that it took. Also it’s more of the same idea for WCW: take something that was a big deal a long time ago and try to get something more out of it. Yes it would work short term, but it was shown to not work in the long term.

More Nitro Girls. Tony is only pretty sure that the Warrior was DDP’s shocker.

Dean Malenko vs. Curt Hennig

This has potential. Curt bails to the floor and we take our second break in about two and a half minutes. Back with Dean pulling Hennig into the ring but Curt taking it right back to the floor to beat on Malenko. Back in and Dean goes off with forearms in the corner, only to be taken down by a clothesline. Hennig cranks on the neck but Dean backdrops Curt down.

A snapmare gets two for Malenko but he runs into a boot in the corner. The HennigPlex is countered with knees to the ribs and Dean suplexes Curt a few times. Tony rips on Raw’s main event again as Hennig escapes the Cloverleaf. A Rude distraction and a shot to the back sets up the HennigPlex to end Dean a few seconds later.

Rating: D. I expected WAY more from these two. They never got out of first gear here and seemed perfectly happy going like that for about five minutes. It’s nice that Dean is back after being gone for a few months in the spring, but Curt seems to be doing exactly what he was doing back in April. That’s not a good sign at all.

Hour #3 begins.

Here are Buff Bagwell, Scott Steiner (with literally half of his body in bandages) and some frumpy old woman. Scott talks about Rick hitting him in the elbow last week, and everyone knows that the elbow bone is connected to the shoulder which is connected to the neck bone, and that’s why his knee hurts. Steiner’s doctor, who is apparently a man, says that Scott is indeed hurt. Scott can’t hold his arm up so clearly he can’t face Rick at Fall Brawl. This brings out Rick who says he wants the match so Scott says he’ll do it at Fall Brawl. The team split up six months ago and we’re still waiting on the match?

Nitro Girls part 3.

TV Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Chris Jericho vs. Stevie Ray

Chavo has gone nuts and has a stick horse named Pepe for a friend. Jericho is TV Champion after beating Stevie, who became champion after Booker T couldn’t defend the title due to injury and allegedly gave Stevie power of attorney to defend the title. At least I think that’s what happened as the announcers don’t sound entirely sure. One fall to a finish here with Jericho throwing Chavo into Stevie to start. Jericho bails out to the floor so Stevie throws Guerrero on top of him in a nice power display.

Chavo comes back in with a high cross body for two on Stevie but now Jericho wants to hook up with Guerrero. A running forearm and middle rope bulldog get two on the champion but now Ray lifts Chavo into the air again, only to have Jericho break it up for two. Ray takes them both down with a double clothesline but the smaller guys come back with a double suplex.

Chris and Chavo hit a double missile dropkick from the same corner but Jericho breaks up Guerrero’s cover on Ray. Ray runs over the referee but knocks Jericho out with a blackjack. Guerrero puts a sleeper on Stevie Ray but here’s Giant to chokeslam Stevie, which apparently is what gave Jericho the title in the first place. Chavo gets up but staggers out of the ring. Jericho gets to his feet….and wins by countout because Ray can’t get up? Uh….sure, but why not just have Jericho cover the unconscious Stevie for the pin?

Rating: D+. Bizarre ending, bizarre booking and unexplained interference aside, there were a few decent spots in here to carry things. This is a good example of how watching all of the shows coming up to this could have helped out a lot. Chavo getting to show personality is definitely a good thing though as he’s very talented but didn’t have the character to back it up.

US Title: Bret Hart vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Bret is defending, having traded the title with Lex Luger over the last week. Page gets a quick two off a belly to belly but Bret bails to the floor to avoid a Diamond Cutter. DDP follows him to the floor and pounds away, sending Bret into the barricade. Back in and Page fires off elbows in the corner and gets two off a suplex. Page goes to the corner to rain down right hands but Bret hits him low.

The referee must have been following a piece of lint in the air because it was right in front of him but Bret wasn’t even admonished. Bret drops Page face first onto the buckle to take over even more as momentum shifts. Hart rakes the eyes across the top rope ala Arn Anderson but Page grabs a quick small package for two. We hit the Five Moves of Doom with the elbow getting two. A hard whip into the corner puts Page down again and a good looking piledriver gets two on Page.

DDP pops right up and pounds away on Bret in the corner before taking him down with a discus lariat. A top rope clothesline gets a near fall on the champion and the Pancake gets the same. The referee gets pumped and Bret pulls out a foreign object to blast Page in the head. Then in a bizarre moment, for some reason he puts the object in Page’s tights and drags Page on top of himself but kicks out at two.

The Sharpshooter goes on, Page slaps the mat on three separate occasions (as in three sets of taps) and shakes his head up and down but the referee does nothing at all. Page grabs the rope for the break and grabs a Diamond Cutter out of nowhere. The referee does his job for the first time all match by noticing Bret’s foot being under the rope. Bret claims that Page hit him with something so the referee checks him, only to find the object for the DQ. We’ll ignore that the referee had a completely unobstructed view for the last several minutes and would have seen Page hit Hart or put it back in his tights.

Rating: B-. Good match here but the strange booking brought it down. The ending makes sense given the setup, but the setup made no sense. I get that Bret put the object there as a safety net, but why not just pin Page when he was knocked out? Also there were way too many instances here with the referee coming off like an idiot. These two had good chemistry together but I don’t remember a match between them not being overbooked.

More Nitro Girls, this time with the WCW version of Wrestling Buddies.

WCW World Title: Goldberg vs. The Giant

Tony bashes Raw again, saying they’re going to give the fans what they advertised, unlike their competitors. Giant has Disciple with him. Goldberg’s music hits and the fake chants pipe in. I rarely notice those so they must be really bad here. Buffer introduces Goldberg as the unified WCW/NWO World Champion.

Giant charges at him in the corner to start and slams Goldberg down, only to have Goldberg pop up and slam Giant right back. Giant clubs him down again and hits a quick Russian legsweep for no cover. Goldberg is sent to the floor but has to knock out Disciple. The champion posts Giant but the big man is able to suplex Goldberg in from the apron, only to have Goldie pop right back up. The spear connects but Disciple comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. It was indeed longer than ten seconds, but the whole thing didn’t even last four minutes. If I’m WCW, I’d have a bigger match than that if I was going to spend almost three hours bragging about how good it was going to be. This is like a kid bragging that he got a D on a paper when his friend got an F. Goldberg’s power moves were impressive but there was nothing to the match at all. Two straight DQ finishes didn’t help things either.

Goldberg spears Disciple down and hits him with the Jackhammer but Scott Hall comes in to beat the champion down. Nash comes in for the save, takes out Giant and pulls Hall off of Goldberg, only to take a spear meant for Scott. Nash basically no sells it and stares Goldberg down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a pretty entertaining show all around, but there are some big problems and you can see them coming soon. The Warrior idea is a Band-Aid and nothing more. Yeah it might have gotten them a quick boost, but even WCW had to know this wasn’t going to be a long term solution.

At the end of the day, this is the Hulk Hogan Show, not Nitro. Look back at Page’s promo. He isn’t bringing Warrior in to help him win the title or to help WCW win WarGames. Page brought Warrior in to help him get Hogan. Hogan has lost to Sting and Goldberg in the last eight months and it rolls off of him. Nothing ever changes with him and he just keeps rolling along. How is that interesting TV? Good show, but not for the main stories as usual.

 

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Thunder – April 16, 1998: Bret Hart….In A Match?

Thunder
Date: April 16, 1998
Location: Fargodome, Fargo, North Dakota
Commentators: Lee Marshall, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

It’s the final show before Spring Stampede and by now the news has broken that Nitro lost in the ratings on Monday for the first time in nearly two years. It should be interesting to see if things change up at all tonight to try to right the ship. Other than that tonight is going to be the final push for the PPV, meaning more NWO whether anyone likes it or not. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the main event from Nitro with Bret Hart cleaning house to save Sting.

NWO video on Buff Bagwell, showing him looking in a mirror.

Buff Bagwell vs. Rick Steiner

Rick throws his collar around to get Vincent off the apron before scaring Buff to the floor as well. Buff armdrags him down and poses so Rick punches him in the face. An atomic drop and a clothesline put Buff on the floor as Lee wonders who brought Scott Steiner to the NWO. Didn’t we cover that like months ago? Back in and Buff pounds away at Rick’s head, which actually has an effect. Buff’s middle rope ax handle is caught in mid air and Rick throws him around a few times. Rick loads up the bulldog but here’s Scott Steiner to shove him off the top for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here with the whole match existing tos et up something else at Spring Stampede. They’ve been pushing this battle of the Steiners for months now but there’s no sign of the actual showdown coming. Then again why bother pursuing a match that could be a big deal and bring in some money when you can keep pushing Buff Bagwell?

Hogan is amused at Savage’s injuries and is ready to take the title back from Sting soon.

Here’s Nash with something to say. He’s tired of hearing Hogan talking about how amazing he is because Hogan is afraid. Nash should be champion right now and would be if not for Hogan and then Hart interfering in his title shots. Bret made a huge mistake by messing with Nash on Monday and Hart will be dealt with. Back to Hogan: if he doesn’t do what he’s supposed to do on Sunday, Nash will drive a stake through his heart. He’s ready for Giant and Piper and tonight he’s ready for Sting and Bret with Savage as his partner. Just hyping up the big tag matches here.

We get the same video on Goldberg from Nitro.

Goldberg vs. Barry Darsow

Goldberg vs. Saturn is official for Sunday. Barry tries to match power with Goldberg and is easily run over and thrown into the corner. Heenan: “This could be a very hair raising experience for Barry Darsow.” Darsow is bald if that clears anything up. Barry sends him over the top and out to the floor but Goldberg comes right back in with the spear. The Jackhammer makes it 73 in a row.

We get the same video on Page vs. Raven from Nitro.

Here’s JJ Dillon to say that the winner of Page vs. Raven has to defend the US Title against Goldberg on Monday night. I’m jumping the gun a bit here but that means that both of Goldberg’s title shots this year have been announced four days in advance. You would think he’d get more hype than that.

TV Title: Booker T vs. Rick Fuller

Booker fires off kicks and forearms to start, only to run into a powerslam from the much bigger Fuller. Fuller slams him down again but misses a charge into the corner and walks into a spinebuster. The ax kick and side kick set up the missile dropkick to retain Booker’s title. Squash for the most part.

Recap of Hogan vs. Nash, despite them not being opponents anytime soon.

Tony announces Scott Steiner/Buff Bagwell vs. Lex Luger/Rick Steiner at the PPV. Scott Steiner comes out to say he and Buff aren’t showing up because his parents don’t want to see him fight his brother.

Chris Benoit vs. Scott Norton

Benoit pulls Vincent to the floor for some chops before going in and being chopped down by Norton. A few elbow drops have Benoit in trouble and a slam puts him down again. Benoit comes back with some chops but Norton just punches him down with no selling at all. A splash in the corner crushes Benoit and a shoulder sends him all the way to the floor.

Benoit avoids a charge into the post but Norton is back inside first and still in control with a powerslam. Chris escapes a shoulder breaker and takes Norton down with two German suplexes. Norton charges into the post and gets caught in the Crossface, only to have Vincent come in for the DQ immediately.

Rating: D+. What’s the point in Benoit even being out there if Norton won’t sell a single bit of his offense? Norton went into the post twice, both off his own power, and still wouldn’t stay down. Also for the thousandth time or so, WHY CAN SCOTT NORTON NEVER LOSE A CLEAN FALL??? Benoit is going into a PPV title match but can only get a DQ win over Norton because…..I’m thinking Scott Norton has photos of Eric Bischoff smoking crack while wearing women’s lingerie and shoving an old lady down a flight of stairs.

Post match Booker comes in for the save but gets shoved down for his efforts.

Here’s Giant with Piper on his shoulders and something to say. Giant steps over the top rope with Piper still on his shoulders. That’s rather impressive. Piper rambles on and on as he is known to do. His odd line of this promo: “What’s the opposite of Big Sexy? Pee Wee Herman?” Piper gets off Giant’s shoulders and pretends he’s a tiger that has to be tamed. He spends the next minute and a half or so saying he and Giant will win. Piper: “We’ll bring the bat, you bring the balls.” Again, someone keep Piper away from live mics. Please?

Curt Hennig vs. Super Calo

Rude is on commentary as usual. Curt easily takes Calo down and hits a quick Hennig Necksnap for no cover. Calo avoids a charge in the corner and gets one off a quick missile dropkick. Curt will have none of that and stomps Calo down before ending him with the Hennigplex. Squash.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Chris Jericho

During the entrances, Tony rants about how WCW delivers the matches they promise, in reference to Austin vs. McMahon not happening. I would say I remember Ric Flair talking about that last week, but he never showed up as advertised. Chavo pounds away to start, only to get kicked in the ribs and suplexed down for two. Jericho charges into a boot in the corner and gets clotheslined down for two as well as Chavo stays in it. An atomic drop sets up a rollup for two more on Jericho but he trips Guerrero up and hooks an early Liontamer. Chavo crawls over to the ropes but Eddie slaps his hand away twice, forcing Chavo to tap out.

After the quick match, Iaukea comes out with the scale from last week to knock Jericho off of Chavo. They fight to the back, leaving Eddie and Chavo alone in the ring. Uncle Eddie calms Chavo down and says that if Chavo beats Jericho on Sunday, he’s free. Chavo is facing Ultimo Dragon on Sunday but at least there’s a story to the match now.

Here are Hogan, Bischoff and Disciple with something to say. After Eric sucks up to Hogan for awhile, he talks about realizing what he had when Hogan came to WCW in 1994. Hogan runs down Savage and Nash and understands why they’re both jealous of him. He brags about the 3 Ninjas movie and being on the Tonight Show before saying he should get the next world title shot because he’s just that awesome. Nothing much to see here and he didn’t even mention his opponents for Sunday.

Here’s JJ with something to say. First of all, Goldberg will receive his first major title shot this Monday on Nitro. This confirms one of two things: either the TV Title, which Goldberg had a shot at last year, isn’t a major title or WCW doesn’t remember matches that happened five months ago. Also, due to Savage’s injuries, there might have to be a replacement in the world title match. The options would be either DDP, Nash or Hogan. JJ says Savage can wrestle on Sunday if he has a doctor’s clearance, but tonight he just can’t be wearing a cast.

This brings out Savage to say that JJ should be outside watching for red and yellow Vipers that are running over people. JJ says there’s no concrete evidence as to who attacked Savage so he needs a doctor’s clearance and no cast on Savage’s arm. Savage says he’s getting the title shot on Sunday no matter what.

Giant vs. Bryan Adams

Nothing match as Giant shrugs off Adams’ offense (including Adams going up top and just falling off) and kicks him in the face, only to have Vincent run in to break up the chokeslam and draw the DQ.

Post match the B team comes in but gets destroyed as well.

Video on Raven.

Silver King vs. Perry Saturn

Saturn side steps a fast dropkick and hits a running elbow in the corner, only to get caught in a tornado DDT. Saturn avoids a charge in the corner and superplexes King down before the Rings of Saturn gets the submission.

Video on Diamond Dallas Page.

Page says to say he’s ready for Raven but thinking about fighting Goldberg gets him even more jacked up. Goldberg and his buddy Jack Hammer has been running through WCW and Page wants to know if Goldberg can be banged. He’s getting his belt back on Sunday, but the fans are oddly silent during this entire speech.

Sting/Bret Hart vs. Randy Savage/Kevin Nash

Tony goes off about how they’ll deliver what they promised no matter what. Savage has the cast on, despite JJ saying he couldn’t wear one tonight. Bret and Savage get things going but Nash comes in before any contact is made. Nash and Bret pound each other into the corner with Nash hammering Bret in the back to take over. There’s the foot choke in the corner but Nash charges into a boot in the opposite corner.

Bret clotheslines Nash down and fires off right hands before bringing in the world champion. Savage gets the tag and is put in the Scorpion about ten seconds later. Nash pulls Randy out to the floor for a long stall before it’s Bret vs. Nash again. Bret escapes Snake Eyes by shoving Kevin into the corner, only to be punched in the face for his efforts. There’s the side slam but Hart avoids the elbow, only to have Savage break up the Sharpshooter.

Nash puts on a sleeper of all things but Bret suplexes his way to freedom. A double tag brings in Savage and Sting but Nash breaks up the Stinger Splash as everything breaks down. Nash and Bret fight to the floor and the Stinger Splash hits Savage’s cast. Savage goes up for the elbow and waits forever until Hogan and Disciple run in for the DQ because why would a world title match need story development?

Rating: D. This was the usual lazy main event match from all parties involved. Savage being injured excuses his lack of effort but the other three guys just looked bored out there. To be fair though Bret has nothing to do, Sting is the lamest of all lame duck champions and Nash is Nash so why bother trying at all?

Post match Hogan goes after Savage’s bad arm but Nash makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a strange one to grade as the show did a good job of building up to Spring Stampede, but Spring Stampede is one of the least interesting shows in a long time. Why they don’t just do Nash vs. Hogan is beyond me, but I’d guess neither guy was willing to do a job for whatever reason they always gave. The show had its moments but the NWO drags it down as usual.

Here’s Spring Stampede if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/09/07/spring-stampede-1998-2013-redo-here-lies-1997-we-hardly-knew-ye/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Monday Nitro – April 13, 1998: Tonight Is The Night

Monday Nitro #135
Date: April 13, 1998
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay

Tonight is the go home show for Spring Stampede, but much more importantly than that it’s the night that the WWF won a round in the Monday Night Wars. Over on Raw there was the first ever Vince McMahon vs. Steve Austin match, but it should be interesting to see what Nitro was offering that the fans decided wasn’t good enough. Let’s get to it.

The Nitro Girls are in white to open things up.

The announcers talk about the bat match on Sunday.

Scott Steiner vs. Fit Finlay

Vincent has the trophy with him again. I’m assuming it’s some kind of a bodybuilding trophy but WCW hasn’t bothered to explain it yet. Steiner immediately bails to the floor for encouragement from Vincent. Back in and Steiner easily takes him to the mat and rides Finlay over to the ropes.

The belly to belly gets a face pop for Scott and there’s the elbow into the push-ups. Steiner goes to the floor to yell at Larry Hennig (Curt’s dad) before getting caught in an atomic drop from Finlay. The rolling senton puts Steiner down again but Finlay misses a charge into the buckle. A falling suplex from the top sets up the Recliner for the submission from Finlay, making Steiner the WCW Alliteration Champion.

Rating: D+. I’m not wild on Finlay being used for a jobber but it’s better than having big names collide and having them both come out looking lame. Steiner still isn’t over as a heel and the stupid trophy isn’t going to make the fans boo him any more. Nothing match here but Steiner looked pretty dominant.

Bret Hart talks about getting screwed over again. Does he have ANYTHING else he can talk about? This seems to be the first of a bunch of sound bytes from Bret tonight.

Call the Hotline to hear about….uh….wrestling stuff!

Lenny Lane vs. Ultimo Dragon

Things start fast with Dragon taking him over with a headscissors. Dragon has his head slammed into the mat and the corners for good measure with Lane in control. A sunset flip gets two for Dragon but Lane chokes him on the ropes to keep control. We hit the chinlock on Dragon but Lane lets go to yell at the fans. Dragon comes back with the headstand in the corner and a kick to Lenny’s back to take over.

Lane avoids a spinwheel kick and sends Dragon to the floor, only to miss a plancha to put both guys down. Lenny is up first and slams Dragon on the floor but doesn’t follow up. Back in and Dragon runs into a powerslam for two and a bulldog gets the same. Lane tries a suplex but Dragon slips over his back and hooks the Dragon Sleeper for the submission.

Rating: C+. This was much more entertaining than I was expecting with Lane holding his own against the Dragon until the end of the match where he got caught. Lane is one of those guys that was talented but never got a chance to show off. With more charisma, Dragon could have been a solid midcard guy in WCW but he was always stuck around the cruiserweights or lower card.

Bret wants to be world champion.

The announcers talk about the bat match again, this time for like two minutes straight.

Roddy is in the back and says he’s tired of listening to Hogan and Nash so tonight they’re fighting each other. After that’s done, he’s coming after Hogan himself. Hogan and Disciple get tired of listening to Piper’s rambling and run in to lay him out.

Here’s Giant with something to say. He knows Piper is going to be fine for Sunday and lets the NWO know that he hasn’t forgotten a thing Nash has done to him. Very short here but it got the point across well enough.

Johnny Grunge vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Chavo takes him to the corner to start but gets suckered in by a handshake. Grunge takes over on the arm but Chavo spins out to twist on Grunge’s arm instead. Off to an armbar but Johnny fights up and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to take over. Chavo sends him head first into the buckle and loads up a sunset flip, only to have Grunge sit down on it for the big upset. The announcers treat it like what everyone knew would happen.

Bret doesn’t like Hogan and Nash.

More Nitro Girls, this time with bunny ears.

Here’s Nash with something to say. Apparently Hogan has run out the back door instead of facing him here tonight. Since Hogan has bailed and since Savage is nowhere in sight, how about Nash vs. Sting again this week? This brings out Sting with the bat but no belt. JJ comes out to hold them back but Sting says Nash can have the title shot. Dillon says the match has to be in the main event, but Sting wants the powerbomb reinstated. JJ isn’t sure but eventually gives in.

Glacier vs. Chris Benoit

Glacier fires off some kicks to start but Benoit leg whips him down and stomps Glacier in the corner. Glacier comes back with his kicks as the announcers talk about Booker vs. Benoit for the TV Title at the PPV with no time limit. A kick to the back of Benoit’s head gets two more but Benoit comes back with a hard chop. Benoit takes him down with a German suplex as Tony compares Glacier’s win/loss record to Goldberg’s. Glacier sweeps Benoit’s legs out but Chris calmly waits for him to come over and snaps on the Crossface for the submission.

Rating: C-. The match was nothing of note but Benoit looked great out there. The German looked great and the ending was perfect. Benoit looked like he was toying with Glacier out there which is what you want going into the title match on Sunday. The more Nitro I watch I understand Benoit’s fans raging against WCW for never pushing him. He’s just that good.

Hour #2 begins so we hit the recap button.

Buff Bagwell vs. Lex Luger

Before the match Bagwell and Bischoff have something to say. Buff says the one thing he can’t do is predict the future. If he could, he would have challenged Rick Steiner instead of Luger for attacking Bischoff. Buff makes fun of Luger and Steiner’s poses in a funny bit. Bischoff says Hogan isn’t here to take care of Rick because he’s on the Tonight Show. The idea of Hogan associating with Rick Steiner is rather amusing.

Buff pounds away to start after a quick posedown, only to have Luger run him over with a shoulder. A dropkick puts Luger down and it’s time for more posing. Luger hiptosses and slams Bagwell down, sending Buff out to the floor. In one of the only times I can ever remember, Luger actually shows some humor by doing Buff’s strut and pose, complete with the big grin.

Back in and Luger pounds away but gets caught by a swinging neckbreaker. We hit the reverse chinlock with Luger looking more bored than in pain. Buff lets go of the hold but misses the Blockbuster, allowing Luger to do his usual sequence for the comeback. There’s the Torture Rack but Bischoff comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Of all the matches they could start the second hour with, they picked this? As in the match where the whole story is Bagwell has beaten Luger like five times already? That’s a good way to sum up WCW: yeah we know you’ve seen this already, but here it is again because we don’t have any new ideas. Also, why was Buff Bagwell so protected? It’s not as bad as Norton but he was always losing by DQ or countout instead of pin or submission, even to much bigger stars like Luger.

Post match both Steiners run out with Rick and Luger standing tall.

Bret Hart says Savage should get out of the NWO while he can.

The Nitro Girls are in black now.

Heenan is on commentary.

Cruiserweight Title: Super Calo vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho thinks Super Calo is Iaukea under a stupid looking mask. Calo denies it in Spanish but Jericho insists it’s the Prince. The referee actually goes to check it, giving Jericho the cheap shot for an early advantage. A big forearm puts Calo down and a suplex gets two for the champion. Calo comes back with a cradle, only to get punched in the mask to put him back down.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Jericho easily avoids a dropkick. A gutwrench suplex gets two for Chris and we get a mini fit from Jericho. Calo jumps over Jericho in the corner and gets two off a missile dropkick. Jericho misses a charge and falls to the floor for a BIG plancha from Calo. Back in and Calo misses the top rope headscissors, allowing Jericho to hook the Liontamer to retain.

Rating: C-. Jericho looked good in this glorified squash. That’s one of the problems with Jericho’s reign: he’s beaten every big name in the division and there’s no one left to seriously challenge him. The biggest name he hasn’t beaten is Ultimo Dragon I guess and he’s not even that big of a deal in division anymore.

Post match Jericho won’t let go of the hold so Iaukea comes down. Jericho: “They’re twins!”

Bret Hart respects a few people but Sting is the highest on the list. If Sting ever needs him, just say the word.

Saturn vs. Hammer

Kidman tries to stop this from happening and is thrown away by both guys. They slug it out with Hammer taking over with a clothesline. He puts Saturn on the top for a slam before ramming Saturn’s head into the mat over and over. Saturn comes back with chops in the corner and some high kicks to the head for good measure. Hammer escapes an armbar with a belly to back suplex before lifting Saturn up into a modified Gory Stretch to block a backslide. Not that it matters as Saturn suplexes him down and hooks the Rings of Saturn for the submission. Better match than I was expecting here actually.

Rocco Rock vs. Goldberg

A hard shoulder block puts Rocco down and a right hand does the same. They trade elbows to the face before Goldberg launches him across the ring. Rocco bails to the floor so Goldberg beats him up out there, only to punch the post by mistake. Rocco whips him into the steps and loads up a table in the ring. Goldberg pops back in and spears him through the table (not a DQ for no apparent reason) and the Jackhammer makes it 72 in a row.

Saturn tries to get to Goldberg but Raven stops him. Goldberg beats up Sick Boy and Kidman for fun. Saturn is next.

Video on Goldberg.

Hour #3 begins.

More Nitro Girls, still in black.

Nitro Party video.

Curt Hennig vs. Yuji Nagata

Well at least it’s not Neidhart. Rude goes to the commentary booth but says he has guests to take care of at ringside. Apparently Rude’s father is in the front row along with Larry Hennig. Yuji jumps Curt while he’s hugging his dad, earning him a Perfect beating. Nagata is sent to the floor for a beating from Rude. We’re in Minnesota tonight so the fans are completely behind Rude and Hennig. Nagata gets in a few kicks but Hennig shrugs them off and chops Yuji down in the corner. Hennig sends him to the floor so Larry Hennig can reveal a HENNIG RULES shirt. Back in and the PerfectPlex ends the squash.

Post match Rude handcuffs Nagata to the ropes so the beating can continue. Neidhart comes down well after they’ve gone and isn’t even acknowledged by the announcers.

TV Title: La Parka vs. Booker T

They lock up and head to the corner for a clean break. The fans chant what sounds like Jesse as Booker backdrops La Parka down. Booker kicks him down and clotheslines him out to the floor. Back in and they clothesline each other down but Booker is up first with a spinebuster. Part of La Parka’s match is torn. A flapjack sets up the side kick and the missile dropkick retains Booker’s title.

Rating: C-. Again the match wasn’t bad but there’s nothing on this show that makes me want to keep watching it. La Parka’s hot streak is over as he’s now just a jobber to the stars. Booker got a nice win here just like Benoit did earlier which makes both guys look good going into the title match. Simple idea yet it’s so rarely done today.

Post match La Parka loads up the chair but Benoit comes out to stop him. Booker offers a handshake but Benoit shoves him down instead.

Video on Raven vs. DDP.

US Title: Robbie Rage vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Page runs him over and hits a quick belly to back suplex for no cover. Rage’s partner Kaos grabs Page’s leg, giving Rage a cheap shot to the champion’s ribs. A nice looking springboard splash gets two but Page crotches Rage against the post to stop him cold. Back in and a running Diamons Cutter retains the title. Another squash.

Post match Raven and the Flock come down the aisle with Raven yelling about being stuck in ECW since Page wouldn’t get him a job in WCW. Page dives over the top to take the Flock out but they stop him from getting to Raven.

Konnan vs. Rick Steiner

Vincent and DiBiase get in a shoving match before the bell which distracts Rick (like that’s so hard) to give Konnan an early advantage. Rick comes back with something close to a low blow to send Konnan out to the floor. Steiner follows and gets double teamed by Vincent and Konnan, only to have DiBiase beat up Vincent to a big reaction. Back in and Konnan hits his rolling lariat before putting on an armbar. Konnan tries to jump over Rick in the corner but gets caught in a powerslam for two. Rick suplexes him down again and the Steiner Bulldog gets the pin.

Rating: C-. Oddly enough Rick looked pretty good here with his suplexes and throws. At the end of the day though, it’s really hard to get fired up for Konnan vs. Rick Steiner in a four minute match. It’s nice to see someone new pushed to fight the NWO, but Rick Steiner is only going to draw so much interest.

Video on Savage vs. Nash vs. Hogan.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Sting

The announcers have spent all night hyping the fact that the powerbomb is legal. If I know WCW, it probably won’t even be used. Sting pounds him into the corner to start and rains down right hands, only to try to jump over Nash and get caught in Snake Eyes. There’s the foot choke in the corner followed by some knee lifts to the ribs. Nash continues his slow pace by firing off elbows in the corner. Sting comes back with some kicks to the ribs but can’t slam Nash.

Off to a neck crank on the champion before Nash elbows him in the face to stop a comeback. A gutwrench slam gets two on Sting and Nash finally calls for the powerbomb. Scratch that as we need a sidewalk slam for two first. We hit the bearhug as the build to the big move continues. It’s not something you can say that often in a Nash match but the psychology is solid here.

Sting slaps Nash’s ears to break the hold but can’t drop him. Two Stinger Splashes and a dropkick can’t drop Nash so there’s a third Splash. Sting puts on the Scorpion but Savage comes in with a cast shot, giving Nash two. Nash hits the powerbomb but Bret Hart pulls out the referee for the DQ.

Rating: C. Screwy ending aside, this wasn’t all that bad. They did a good job of building up the back injury for Sting and you could see them setting up the powerbomb. Sting has always played a good David to someone else’s Goliath so the result here was a surprisingly entertaining match.

Bret holds off the NWO single handedly to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I can’t blame the fans a bit for flipping over to Raw. Let’s look at this for a second: the first match of the second hour was built around the idea of they’ve fought six times before, then the main event is a rematch with another run-in ending. The most competitive match in between there was Hammer vs. Perry Saturn and the rest were glorified squashes. Nothing on here was fresh or new and the show felt like it has for months: uninteresting and focused entirely on the NWO which has been going on for nearly two years now.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews, and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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On This Day: August 30, 2010 – Monday Night Raw: You Don’t Look A Day Over 890

This is very old and not very well done.

 

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 30, 2010
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the 900th episode and Raw and Smackdown both will be there. Surprisingly enough this is only a two hour show though. There hasn’t been much announced for this, so let’s get to it.

We open up by YET AGAIN being told how awesome Raw is. Vince, let it go. Mainstream media flat out does not care, so stop trying to make them accept you. It simply isn’t going to happen.

Cole says the 900th consecutive week. We’ll ignore the preempted shows and the Best of shows I guess.

5 on 5 elimination match with Nexus vs. Sheamus, the Canadian duo, Orton and Cena. Good to see they’re not overkilling the match before Survivor Series.

Here’s Bret to open the show, which makes sense since this is a show about old school. He talks about how great Raw is and how many records it holds etc. Bret says only Taker was on the first show also, cueing Kane. This is a new pairing if nothing else. Baldie says there is no more phenom because he hasn’t meant anything since he beat Shawn at Mania.

Kane talks about how Bret hated Shawn etc. Bret can’t wait for Taker to beat Kane like he always does. Good line and simple. Old guys know how to talk. Kane says he needs to take out an icon like Taker did, so he grabs Bret. Hart Dynasty comes out for the save but gets knocked back with ease. Bret does better but the lights go out.

I’m sure you know who’s in the ring now as we get the staredown. Taker looks like he’s about to cry and Kane bails. Cue the e-mail and tonight it’s Bret….vs. Taker? Well that’s the biggest name Taker has never been able to beat, so that fits pretty well.

We go back to the first episode of Raw for some clips which are always fun.

Back from a break and we see the zamboni incident, which was the night after Taker and Kane beat Austin in a triple threat at I think Unforgiven.

Michael McGillicutty/Kofi Kingstonvs. Daniel Bryan/Kaval vs. Miz/Alex Riley

Someone get me a boat to navigate the river of semen in the IWC at this point. Miz has a sweet new shirt with an id sticker on it saying “Hello I’m AWESOME!” I would totally wear that and I haven’t bought a WWE shirt in over 10 years. It’s a very fast paced match that I won’t even bother trying to keep track of.

Everything goes insane and Kaval hits a sweet rolling kick to Riley, setting up the Warrior’s Way. Cue in Miz for the Skull Crushing Finale to end it on Kaval. Bryan takes the MITB case to the head post match.

Rating: C+. It was very fast paced and worked rather well I thought. This was designed to get the crowd going and to give us a look at the NXT guys. It did that in just a few minutes which is always a good thing. Quick match but certainly entertaining and it kept my attention, making it a win.

Laycool vs. Melina/Eve Torres

Well you can’t say they’re not attractive. Melina pins Layla in maybe 40 seconds with a rollup. Well ok then.

Michelle throws out the predictable challenge for the unification match at NOC but doesn’t say which member of Laycool is it. Melina insists it’s a lumberjack match. The Divas all come out and stand by her to end this segment.

Another Raw moment is Nexus beating down Cena, which is a big moment but dang man there are bigger ones than that.

Nexus is in the back and there are only five of them given Sheffield’s injury. Barrett says they have to do something to remember tonight and says he knows what it is but doesn’t say what it is.

We get another “historical” moment, this time the Bob Barker hosted show. Ok they’re stretching here methinks.

Jericho talks about how he says he’s great because he is great. If he doesn’t win the title at NOC, he’s gone. Josh says Jericho has been thrown out or fired at least a dozen times now, making me laugh. Jericho says watch what he’s going to do tonight.

John Morrison/RTruth vs. Cody Rhodes/Drew McIntyre

Well this was unexpected. Something tells me Morrison is going to do something of note here. It’s a big brawl almost immediately and there’s a double DQ. This was for the #1 contenders slot so screw that apparently. Truth dives over the ropes to take out Rhodes. Was there a point to this at all?

Another Raw moment is Bret and Shawn making up. This is a legit major moment so I’ll give them that.

Undertaker vs. Bret Hart

Taker’s robe is a bit different now as he has the hood and sleeveless thing again, meaning no trenchcoat. And here’s Nexus. Ok make that just Barrett. He says it’s about the future and not ht epast, so he goes after Taker. Barrett gets knocked to the floor and then the lights go out. Kane is here and they slug it out, which Kane wins to a degree.

Taker goes for a chokeslam and there go those lights again. Someone really should look into that. Kane is gone (as is Bret) and here’s Nexus. Taker fights them off and has Barrett ready for the chokeslam but the lights go out AGAIN. We come back and Barrett has him up in the Wasteland. Kane is on the stage as it hits. A 450 hits Taker and he can’t quite sit up.

If you can’t tell this show has more or less sucked beyond belief so far.

Here’s Jack Swagger. Dang he’s fallen since the summer.

Jack Swagger vs. Evan Bourne

As Bourne makes his entrance, Cole lists off MORE shows that Raw has been on the air longer than with Lawler saying Friends only had 236 or some odd shows. I’m not even going to go into the rant about why that’s incredibly stupid because here’s Alberto Del Rio of all people with his full car entrance and pyro. He even gets a split screen. Air Bourne misses and Swagger gets the ankle lock for the tap. We saw maybe a minute combined of the in ring action without a split screen, meaning no rating.

Del Rio cuts off Swagger’s music and talks about how he got rid of Rey. However since none of the Raw fans saw it he’s going to recreate it here. He grabs a chair and Evan is in trouble. MARK HENRY of all people comes out for the save. Ok him just punching the chair out of Del Rio’s hand was in fact very cool.

We get a video about the China tour, which is indeed awesome.

This is Your Life Rock, which is actually a cool moment.

The Straight Edge Society is here, and Punk is better than The Rock. Punk says that Raw has pushed negative family values, and he has two words to prove it: Katie Vick. “If you don’t know who that is, Youtube it. It’ll drive you to drink and then you can come see me.” He has a list of four things that WWE has been bad about over the years.

Property Damage: HHH breaking into Orton’s house.

General irresponsibility: Cena throwing Edge in the water. Punk talks about never throwing anyone into water (with the joke of course being that he won a match like that against Chavo in ECW)

Tresspassing: DX invading WCW.

The last one is exhibit D for drunkenness, which is due to the beer bath…..on SANTINO. Yeah they picked that one instead of what was voted the #1 Raw moment back at the tenth anniversary show.

Punk makes fun of Austin and CUE GLASS SHATTERING!

And he’s not here. Punk literally rolls on the mat with laughter. He asks if the fans feel empty inside now, because that’s how he feels with every one of the fans. Punk has one more clip, which is the ring breaking thanks to Show and Lesnar. It’s to bash Show and he won’t say Lesnar’s name.

Show comes out and he mentions Eddie and a burrito. He wants to know why Punk picked a fat joke when he’s done all kinds of stupid stuff. We get a Show promo about the SES as Hulk Hogan. Show clears the ring of course and we go to a break.

HHH’s return in 2002 was in fact amazing.

Sheamus comes out to talk on the ramp. Surprisingly he doesn’t get a big pop since we’re in Boston. He mentions HHH and says he’s never coming back. Here comes Edge, who gets a BIG face pop. He talks about how many moments he’s had on Raw and all that jazz which is true. Edge also says Sheamus should go back to the lab with Dr. Bunsen Honeydew. Total face promo here.

Sheamus/Randy Orton/John Cena/Edge/Chris Jericho vs. Nexus

This is elimination rules and the bell rang at 10:59. Jericho walks out after a few seconds and it’s 5-4. Edge immediately shoves the referee and it’s 5-3. Tarver and Cena are in now and Cena dominates for the most part. Sheamus beats up various people for awhile and this is just awful. High Cross is blocked and Nexus takes over. SLATER PINS SHEAMUS! Totally clean for the most part too. He hit his finisher and that was it. Hokey smoke.

FU gets rid of Slater. Big beatdown and Cena is in trouble. Otunga goes out to the STFU. 450 to Cena and he’s out! Orton vs. Gabriel, Barrett and Tarver. Make that Barrett and Tarver as an RKO takes out Gabriel. It’s Barrett vs. Orton now. That happened in less than 15 seconds. Wasteland and it’s over. Less than a minute passed between Cena’s elimination and the end of the match, which included the eliminations of Gabriel, Tarver and Orton.

Rating: F+. Just a total reversal of what we saw at Summerslam. This was boring and not interesting in the slightest, although BIG props for the clean pins on the three mega stars from the non-Nexus team. Those were very unexpected and made them look like they were human. That being said, the match was just awful. Three eliminations in about 40 seconds? Seriously? Just a bad match if there ever has been one and a fitting end to an awful Raw.

Overall Rating: D-. Just a horrible show all around. Punk’s promo and segment is the only good thing this had going for it really. For a special, there were so many quick matches that you barely remember anything about, including one that was about 12 seconds long. The main event was just bad all around but to be fair they did get the point of NOC across.

 

Shame that it two me about a day to get that idea. The lack of wrestling and the lack of nostalgia hurt this a lot as apparently barely anything has happened other than in the last two years. This could have been worse but not by much. Punk’s promo was all that made this passable, which is saying a lot since he’s a Smackdown guy. Bad show.

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2010: What Happens When The One Match On A Show Sucks

Summerslam 2010
Date: August 15, 2010
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,178
Commentators: Matt Striker, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Tonight’s show focuses on one idea: the Nexus Invasion. Back in February of 2010 ECW was replaced by a new competition show called NXT. Eight rookies tried to become the next WWE Superstar with Wade Barrett winning the competition. One night in June, these eight men invaded Raw and took over the arena to end the show. Over the next three months, these men, now called Nexus, terrorized the company and John Cena in particular. Tonight it’s Team WWE vs. Nexus in a Survivor Series elimination tag match. We also have Kane vs. Mysterio and Orton vs. Sheamus in the title matches. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about how change can affect so many things, such as Nexus destroying everything in sight.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler

Dolph is defending and has Vickie with him. These two have fought a ridiculous number of times, even trumping Edge vs. Cena. Ziggler took the title nine days ago with Vickie’s assistance. Vickie’s EXCUSE ME is finally cut off by Kofi’s music. Kingston quickly takes him down and stomps away before clotheslining Dolph to the outside. A suicide dive totally misses though and Ziggler gets a breather.

Back in and the champion pounds away before getting two off a neckbreaker. We hit an early chinlock but Kofi is out of it in a few seconds. Instead Dolph sends him face first into the buckle for two before hitting a Hennig neck snap for two. Off to a reverse chinlock for a few moments until the jumping elbow drop gets two for Dolph.

We hit chinlock #4 but Kofi gets bored and goes off on the champion before hitting the Boom Drop. The middle rope cross body is rolled through, getting a two for Dolph as things speed up. A Fameasser puts Kofi down for two more but he pops up and clotheslines Dolph back down. The champion avoids Trouble in Paradise and hooks his sleeper but the Nexus runs in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. These two are capable of having far better matches if they don’t have to kill time until the run-in ending. Far too much of the match was spent in the chinlockery and it’s a rare bad opening match for Summerslam. Kofi continues his career path as Ziggler is about to start his climb to almost the top of the company.

Ziggler bails and Nexus destroys Kingston. Barrett talks about how Team WWE only has six men but the seventh doesn’t matter because Nexus is going to destroy them. This felt like the opening of Raw.

Jericho begs Mr. MITB and the US Champion the Miz to be on Team WWE. Edge is on the Miz’s other side eating a Slim Jim because Edge is awesome. Jericho says Miz doing this in LA could be bigger than Titanic or Avatar Miz doesn’t seem intersted.

Divas Title: Alicia Fox vs. Melina

Alicia is champion and the flavor of the month of the division. Melina has on a headdress that makes her look like a peacock. She looks….stupid. Melina takes forever taking off her furry boots before we’re finally ready to go. After they stare at each other for a good while Melina shoves her into the corner and then they stare at each other some more. The champion takes it to the mat with a headlock before Melina comes up with forearms. Off to a kind of Indian Deathlock with a curb stomp to Fox followed by a pair of knees to Fox’s ribs.

Some more forearms have Fox in trouble but Melina lands on her bad knee which cost her eight months off. The knee is good enough for Melina to superkick Fox, only to be sent shoulder first into the post. Back in and Fox goes after the arm because she’s not that bright. Melina realizes how stupid this is and makes her comeback with a kick to the ribs. A LOUD scream sets up a kick to the back and kind of a Diamond Cutter faceplant for the pin and the title.

Rating: D-. Both girls looked great but my dear merciful goodness Fox was embarrassing out there. When Jerry Lawler is making fun of you for having a lack of psychology, it’s a bad sign for your match. The Divas division hit a black hole after Trish and Lita left and this was a great example of how bad it was getting.

Post match Josh Matthews goes in to talk to Melina but here’s Laycool to interrupt. They’re the co-women’s champions here after literally tearing the belt in two. They try to take a picture with Melina but she kicks them both in the ribs. Layla trips Melina up though, allowing Michelle to clearly not make contact on a big boot. Fox tries to join in but gets beaten down as well. The titles would be unified next month.

Trace Adkins, Marlon Wayans and Michael Clarke Duncan are here.

We recap Big Show vs. Straight Edge Society. Mysterio had won a match against Punk, forcing him to shave his head. Punk wore a mask to hide it but Big Show ripped it off to humiliate him. Punk’s Society (Luke Gallows, Joey Mercury and Serena) got together and broke Big Show’s hand in a segment much funnier than it should have been due to Big Show’s face while being choked out.

Big Show vs. Straight Edge Society

Three on one handicap match. Punk has already grown his hair to a bit shorter than it is in 2013. We continue the awesome that is CM Punk as he wears a shirt saying “I Broke Big Show’s Hand”, which is a reference to Greg Valentine’s “I Broke Wahoo’s Leg” shirt from about thirty years ago. Show takes off his cast to reveal that the hand is fully healed and to freak Punk out a bit.

Mercury charges right into a chop and Gallows gets the same. The Society has to tag in and out here so Punk calls a conference on the apron. Gallows and Mercury jump Big Show and apparently tagging isn’t required here. Show easily throws away the lackeys and palms Mercury by the head, throwing him over the top and onto Gallows. Punk is the only one left now and a few shots to the back easily put him down. Show misses a chop and hits the steps, giving the Society an opening to go after the hand.

The Society pounds away with really basic stuff as we’re just waiting on the comeback. Punk charges into a back elbow and Show cleans house for a bit until Punk hits a high kick to slow him down. Some running knees in the corner stagger the giant before a double DDT from Punk and Mercury gets two. Punk goes nuts on the hand but Show picks him up on his shoulders. After dropping Punk over the top, the lackeys are destroyed again and Show chokeslams Mercury onto Gallows for a double pin.

Rating: D. Another dull match here as Big Show never once felt like he was in any kind of danger at all. That was the problem with this whole feud: Show treated Punk like an annoyance rather than an opponent. This would lead up to the destruction of Punk in a one on one match next month because Big Show needed that push right?

Kane is standing by Undertaker’s casket and talks about getting revenge on Rey Mysterio for attacking Undertaker. Raw World Champion Sheamus comes in and proposes an alliance but Kane wants no part of it. Kane says Sheamus has guts and they’ll be on the floor if he interrupts Kane again. Sheamus is still a heel here and is actually pretty awesome.

Speaking of awesome, here’s Miz to answer Jericho and Edge’s offer from earlier. Miz doesn’t care if the fans want him on the team or not because he’s the missing link in the WWE chain. Earlier today Cena admitted he was wrong about Miz and brags about Bret Hart begging him to be on the team on Raw.

Jericho gave Miz a Fozzy CD but Miz threw it away. Miz’s former partner John Morrison admitted Miz was the HBK of the team, Edge gave him Slim Jims and Truth wrote him a rap. Miz is the future and brags about how much bigger he is than everything else. He actually agrees to be on the team tonight but the fans aren’t allowed to do his catchphrase with him. Cole loses his mind over Miz’s announcement.

We recap Orton vs. Sheamus. There isn’t much to say here as Orton won a three way over Edge and Jericho on Raw to earn the shot. Sheamus won the title at Fatal Fourway with the unintentional assistance of Nexus. Sheamus has been hurting a lot of people lately and he claims Orton is the next victim.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging if that somehow wasn’t clear. This is during Orton’s bare arms phase which was always a strange look. Cole lets us know that if anyone interferes on Sheamus’ behalf, they’re suspended. If Orton loses, he gets no rematch. Sheamus shoves him into the corner and shouts in his face. It works so well that he does it again, earning him right hands to the face. Orton stomps Sheamus down into the corner and hits a hard clothesline to put him down again.

Orton drops him with another clothesline and a third to send the champion to the floor. The fourth straight clothesline sends Sheamus into the crowd but Orton has to go back inside before the ten count. Back in and Orton hits the circle stomp for two and a catapult into the bottom rope sends Sheamus outside again. The champion FINALLY gets a breather by sending Orton shoulder first into the steps. They’re doing the methodical build here which implies they have a lot of time.

Sheamus takes over with the power brawling via a knee to the ribs and a reverse chinlock. Back up and Orton counters a suplex but the Elevated DDT is countered into a backdrop to the floor. Sheamus rams Orton’s back into the barricade and the look on Orton’s face is great. Back in and a hard ax handle to the head gets two. This is surprisingly good stuff so far which leaves me with little to talk about.

Sheamus grabs something resembling a cross face chicken wing as is the case with most guys who come out of FCW. That’s one of the problems with one training area: you get a lot of the same spots from guys. Orton comes back with kicks to the ribs but another ax handle to the face takes him down. Back to the chicken wing and Sheamus channels his inner Jericho, telling the referee to ask him. Back up and Orton suplexes Sheamus down but can’t follow up.

They slug it out with Orton taking over. The fans are WAY into Randy here. A bad powerslam puts Sheamus down which Cole calls “A malignant growth of momentum.” Lay off the JR metaphors dude. A superplex gets two for Randy but he walks into the Irish Curse (note that at this point, the High Cross (Razor’s Edge) was called the Irish Curse. I’m using the more well known move: the Rock Bottom backbreaker) for two.

The Brogue Kick misses and Sheamus falls to the floor, only to be caught in the Elevated DDT as he comes back inside. The RKO is shoved off for two but Orton escapes the Irish Curse. Brogue Kick is only good for two which is a very rare sight to see. What isn’t a rare sight tonight is a bad finish, much like here as Sheamus gets himself disqualified for a chair shot.

Rating: B-. Bad finish to a good match here. Sheamus is getting better and better which makes you wonder why they book him so badly in present times. The guy is clearly talented but he hasn’t had to really work hard to beat a guy in months. This was a good match though and they clearly have chemistry together.

Post match Orton snaps and kicks Sheamus low before RKOing him onto the announce table. The fans want Miz but get a trailer for John Cena’s new movie instead.

We recap Kane vs. Mysterio. Kane won MITB and cashed in the same night to win the Smackdown Title over Rey. This was at the same time that someone had attacked Undertaker and left him in a “vegetative state” because we can’t say coma in WWE. Kane swore to find who did it but Mysterio accused Kane of doing it himself. Tonight is the rematch and somehow a way for Kane to prove his innocence.

Smackdown World Title: Kane vs. Rey Mysterio

Kane brings out a casket and I think you know where this is going. Kane hits a quick slam to start but Rey avoids an elbow drop. Rey tries to fire off some offense but Kane easily throws him around. The 619 is easily countered and Rey is sent to the floor. He slides back in and hits a quick baseball slide to get an advantage. Back in and Kane punches him off the top rope before ramming Rey back first into the post over and over.

Kane drops him ribs first over the top rope and slaps on a bearhug to keep things slow. Rey forearms out and dropkicks Kane in the chest, only to have Kane clothesline him down on a 619 attempt. Mysterio is sent chest first to the floor and kicked off a springboard to the floor. Kane follows him out but gets caught in a drop toehold into the barricade. Back in and a springboard headbutt to the chest gets two on Kane but he backbreakers Rey down again.

There’s a nice story going here of Rey speeding things up but Kane easily stopping him with power stuff. Power vs. speed is going to work almost every time and it helps that both guys are very talented. Kane bends Rey’s back over his knee before getting two off a side slam. Mysterio manages to break up the top rope clothesline but a rana attempt is easily blocked.

Now the clothesline misses and Mysterio counters another backbreaker into a tilt-a-whirl reverse DDT (here’s a good example of why Matt Striker is annoying. He calls it a Slop Drop, which is another name for a reverse DDT, but come on: does ANYONE think of the Godwinns when they see that move? Is there some Godwinn fan base out there that he’s trying to appeal to? It comes off like him trying to sound smart without adding anything at all). The seated senton puts Kane down and a spinning DDT gets two more.

A hard kick to the face gets the same but Mysterio dives into an uppercut. Kane opens up the casket to show that it’s empty but Rey sends Kane into the ropes. The 619 is caught and Rey is thrown into the casket but he kicks out of danger. Now the 619 connects but Kane gets the feet up on the springboard splash. Rey stops in mid jump though and gets two off a rollup, only to be chokeslammed to death for the pin.

Rating: C. This was about as good as this match could be. At the end of the day, it’s almost impossible to buy Mysterio as a physical threat to a guy the size of Kane. Yeah something like the 619 could stun him but it’s hard to believe anything but that or a rollup is going to get more than a one count. That’s not to say either guy is bad, but it’s the problem with a guy Mysterio’s size.

Post match Kane wants to make Rey pay for what he did to Undertaker. He promises to make Mysterio hurt for eternity and lays him out with two chokeslams and a tombstone. Kane goes to the casket and yep Undertaker is inside. HOW DID HE DO THAT I ASK YOU!!! Taker asks the half dead Rey what happened but Rey says no. The brothers go at it and Kane beats Taker down, I guess turning heel again and shocking no one. The idea is that Taker is still banged up and doesn’t have his full powers back yet.

Video on Axxess.

We recap Nexus vs. Team WWE. I think I’ve covered this well enough but it’s the first season of NXT coming to the main roster to try to take over the company. Over the last few months they’ve attacked various people and tonight it’s about revenge. Great Khali was originally on the team but was taken out by Nexus, leaving Team WWE with just six guys. Team WWE (also called Cena’s Army) is having a lot of problems with Jericho and Edge quitting over Cena’s leadership, only to come back later.

Nexus vs. Team WWE

Nexus: Wade Barrett, Justin Gabriel, Heath Slater, Michael Tarver, David Otunga, Justin Gabriel, Skip Sheffield

Team WWE: John Cena, Bret Hart, Chris Jericho, Edge, R-Truth, John Morrison, ???

You should know most of the Nexus, though Sheffield later changed his name to Ryback. As for Team WWE, Miz isn’t the last man. He comes out but Cena stops him, because it needed to be someone who made his decision earlier. Instead it’s……DANIEL BRYAN! This requires a backstory. The night Nexus debuted, Bryan was a member of the team. However he got fired for choking ring announcer Justin Roberts with a necktie as it wasn’t PG. Tonight is Bryan’s return and he wasn’t a surprise at all. See, WWE.com actually spoiled the return by mistake, ruining it for anyone who saw the website before the match.

It’s a huge brawl to start and Cole RIPS into Bryan for the sake of Miz. Bryan starts with Young and a quick LeBell (YES) Lock makes it 7-6 in less than 45 seconds. Justin Gabriel is in next and gets to fight Chris Jericho for his troubles. Some kicks to the ribs allow for the tag to Truth as things speed up. A suplex into a Stunner is good for two but Gabriel comes back with a spin kick to the face. Off to Tarver who was about as worthless as you could ask for a man to be.

Tarver charges into a boot in the corner and it’s off to Morrison to clean house with some dropkicks. The Fying Chuck (Disaster Kick) sets up Starship Pain (split legged twisting moonsault) for the second elimination. The remaining five members of Nexus hit the floor for a meeting before everything falls apart. Sheffield gets the nod and easily throws Morrison around. A big powerslam puts Morrison down and some snap suplexes work on his back even more. Morrison tries a comeback but Gabriel kicks him in the back of the head, allowing Sheffield to hit a big clothesline for the elimination.

Truth comes in and another clothesline ties the match up maybe twenty seconds later. Jericho comes in but gets sent into the buckle, allowing for the tag off to Barrett. Otunga is in a few seconds later, before he got good in the ring. Now let that one sink in for a minute. Anyway back to Barrett to crank on his NXT mentor’s arms but Jericho gets a boot up in the corner. A clothesline puts both guys down and it’s a double tag to Slater and Hart.

Old Man Bret pounds away on Heath for a few moments and doesn’t look half bad doing it. It doesn’t have the same snap that it used to but Bret’s offense still looks good. He puts on the Sharpshooter but Wade slides in a chair. Bret lets go of the hold and cracks Sheffield over the back in self defense, drawing a DQ. There really wasn’t another way to get rid of him due to an inability to take bumps. Sheffield staggers to his feet and walks into a Codebreaker from Jericho followed by a spear from Edge to tie us up.

To recap it’s Cena, Jericho, Edge and Bryan vs. Gabriel, Barrett, Otunga, Slater. On paper, this should be pure domination. Gabriel is in to face Edge but after scoring some kicks to the chest, Justin walks into an Edge-O-Matic for two. A big spin kick puts Edge down and it’s off to Slater, whose shorter hair makes him look like an even bigger tool than he does today. Slater pulls Edge into the corner for the tag off to Barrett who hooks the chinlock. Edge quickly fights up and scores with a spinwheel kick but gets caught in a swinging neckbreaker.

Back to Otunga who is almost booed out of the building. A standing spinebuster is easily countered into Edge’s Impaler and there’s the tag off to Jericho. Has Cena even been in yet? The running bulldog sets up the Lionsault and the Walls are good for the submission from Otunga. Jericho immediately knocks Slater off the apron and into the announce table to take him down. Back in and the top rope back elbow has Heath reeling but Jericho almost runs into Cena, allowing Slater to hit his running sleeper drop to pin Chris.

Edge comes in to yell at Cena but Slater rams him into John for a rollup pin thirty seconds later. Edge lays out Cena and Jericho adds a few kicks to the ribs of his own. So we have Cena/Bryan vs. Slater/Gabriel/Barrett with Cena getting caught in the Nexus corner. Barrett comes in to pepper Cena with rights and lefts before it’s off to Justin to crank on the arm. Cena tries to fight back but walks into a side slam from Barrett for no cover. John comes back with a quick fisherman’s suplex but Slater breaks up the hot tag attempt.

Cena hits a hard clothesline to put Slater down and dives for the hot tag to Bryan. Daniel comes in with a quick German suplex on Slater as Striker calls for Cattle Mutilation, which means absolutely nothing to most WWE fans. Bryan backflips over Slater in the corner and hits the running clothesline before sending him to the floor for the FLYING HAIRLESS ANIMAL! Back in and Bryan hits the missile dropkick and counters a rollup into the LeBell Lock to get us down to two on two.

Bryan looks at Nexus but here’s Miz to blast him in the back with the MITB case, giving Barrett an easy pin. Gabriel hits a hard right hand in the corner to put Cena down but Cena comes back with his finishing sequence to take Gabriel down. He loads up the AA but Barrett makes a blind tag and breaks it up with a shot to the head.

Nexus stomps away on Cena in the corner and a big boot from Wade sends him to the floor. Gabriel and Barrett peel back the mats at ringside and a DDT on the concrete knocks Cena out cold. Back in and Gabriel misses the 450, allowing Cena to score a quick pin. Barrett comes in and gets caught in the STF out of nowhere for the final elimination 20 seconds later.

Rating: C+. The match was entertaining and never dragged, but the ending doesn’t hold up when you take it out of the moment. Now one thing that does need to be kept in mind is Cena wasn’t in the match until over twenty minutes after the start so he was hardly banged up until the very end. That DDT on the concrete is a bit too much to take though, as Cena goes from out cold to fine in less than a minute. I can’t quite buy that.

This also brings up to the problem with Nexus: they never really won anything. At the end of the day, Barrett was the only one to have any success for a long time and to this day he’s one of two of the seven here to do much of anything. You have Ryback doing pretty well, but the rest are all midcard to lower card guys who haven’t accomplished much. As of August 2013, Tarver is gone, Otunga and Young are lucky to have jobs, Slater is a comedy jobber and Gabriel is a Superstars mainstay. That’s what killed Nexus: at the end of the day, they were a bunch of jobbers who swarmed big names and nothing more.

Overall Rating: D. This is a pretty terrible show with only two matches being decent at all. The main event is pretty good but it’s absolutely nothing worth going out of your way to see. Nexus fizzled out so badly that their existence is really just a big footnote anymore. Bryan wound up being the big star out of all of them and he was literally on the team for one night only. Nexus would go on to do nothing but annoy fans over the next few months, even with new members and Punk as a leader. The show isn’t worth seeing and thankfully things would pick up next year.

Ratings Comparison

Dolph Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Melina vs. Alicia Fox

Original: D

Redo: D-

Straight Edge Society vs. Big Show

Original: D+

Redo: D

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

Original: D+

Redo: B-

Rey Mysterio vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C

Team WWE vs. Nexus

Original: B+

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D

My goodness what was I thinking?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/13/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2010-a-one-match-show-almost-literally/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Starrcade 1999: The Big Idea All Over Again

Starrcade 1999
Date: December 19, 1999
Location: MCI Center, Washington D.C.
Attendance: 8,582
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson, Bobby Heenan

 

Other than the main event, there isn’t much here. The card is thirteen matches long as opposed to the eight or nine that we’ve had for the past few years. The only other main match on the card is a battle of the powerbombs between Nash and Sid who returned earlier this year. There just isn’t much to see here but that’s the case with Russo shows. Another interesting sign about this show: the attendance. Starrcade 1997-2000 were all in the same arena. 1997 drew 17,500 fans, 1998 drew about 16,000, 1999 drew about 8,500 and 2000 drew about 6,500. The writing is on the wall already. Let’s get to it.

 

The intro video lists off all of the matches tonight, starting with the least interesting of them all. Usually it’s the other way around.

 

Disco Inferno/Lash Leroux vs. Mamalukes

 

Leroux is a pretty generic cruiserweight from Louisiana. The Mamalukes are two Italian guys named Johnny the Bull and Big Vito who are your basic mafia gimmick. Vito and Lash start after a quick brawl. The Cajun guy is pounded into the corner as Vito does every Mafia stereotype you can think of. Lash takes a side kick to the face and it’s off to Johnny for some double stomping. Leroux takes him down with a hiptoss and it’s to Disco. Inferno gets two on the Bull via a clothesline and two off a clothesline and Russian legsweep.

 

As Disco stomps away in the corner, we get the story behind this: apparently Disco owes the Italians’ manager Tony Marinara (just go with it) $25,000 and the makeshift team is together because they used to not like each other but now respect one another. Disco has also tarred and feathered Marinara before pouring meat sauce on Vito and the Bull. I’ve heard stupider angles. I can’t think of many but I’ve heard of them.

 

The Mamalukes take over and it’s off to Vito who hits a neckbreaker to give Johnny a two count. After a quick chinlock by the Bull and some double teaming including a wishbone split for Disco’s legs, a double powerbomb gets no cover on Inferno. Instead Vito misses a middle rope splash and it’s off to Lash.

 

Leroux speeds things up and takes Vito down with a spin kick before making the heels hit each other by mistake. Everything breaks down and the Italians hit a double clothesline to take over. Disco and Vito go to the floor as Johnny misses a guillotine legdrop, allowing Disco to hit a splash for two. Everyone is back in again and Disco tries his Chartbuster (Stunner) but Vito breaks it up, sending Disco into Lash for a Chartbuster to his partner for no apparent reason. That and a spinning inverted DDT to Disco are enough for the pin by Vito.

 

Rating: C-. Very basic tag match here but I’ve seen worse. Again though, the idea of this story being based around a guy named Tony Marinara does it no favors and makes for a rather stupid story all around. Disco continues to be impressive though as he was nothing but a comedy character who lasted for many years with the company. He also wasn’t half bad in the ring, but his career was hindered by the character.

 

Post match Disco’s face is covered with an ether rag and placed in a body bag. The Italians carry him to a waiting car and drive off.

 

The announcers hype up the rest of the card.

 

We’re told that US Champion Scott Hall is injured and therefore has to forfeit the title. Here’s Chris Benoit who is awarded the title in Hall’s absence, so he issues an open challenge for a title defense later on in the show. The match will be a ladder match like Benoit vs. Hall was scheduled to be. Ok then.

 

Cruiserweight Title: Madusa vs. Evan Karagias

 

Evan is a generic pretty boy wrestler and is defending. These two used to be a couple but have since split over the title. Madusa jumps him on the way to the ring and sends him into the steps to take over. Evan can’t bring himself to hit her but then he punches her down anyway. What drama indeed as the reaction from the fans (or lack thereof) can tell you. A slam puts Madusa down but Karagias misses a moonsault (which would have missed even if she hadn’t rolled away) and Madusa hits (kind of) a middle rope dropkick for no cover.

 

She goes up again, only to be slammed down by Karagias. They trade powerbombs (Tony on Madusa’s: “that was almost like a powerbomb!”) followed by a neckbreaker from Evan. The fans rightly think this is boring as Evan dives on Madusa on the floor. Cue Evan’s chick Spice to turn on him with a low blow, allowing Madusa to German suplex Karagias down for the title. Did I mention that Spice and Evan hooked up on Monday, making this turn completely pointless?

 

Rating: F. Madusa is one of those very annoying female wrestlers who is supposed to be interesting because she’s a female wrestler, but at the end of the day she just isn’t entertaining. Karagias was as generic of a wrestler as you could get, making this to be absolutely terrible and sloppy on top of that.

 

Cue Norman Smiley in Washington Redskins gear to scream a lot before the match. See he’s a coward, so a producer saying they’re out of time terrifies him.

 

Hardcore Title: Meng vs. Norman Smiley

 

See, it’s funny because it’s a monster vs. a coward. Norman brings out a dumpster full of weapons but puts on a helmet before starting things off. Smiley, the champion, throws the weapons into the ring but has them thrown back at him, sending Norman running off. A garbage can to the head sends Norman staggering away and we head to the back after about fifteen seconds of “action”.

 

Meng is hit by a chair a few times but a trashcan shot has no effect. They head to the catering area with Norman stumbling around. This is a Vince Russo trademark by the way. Meng pounds away on him, throwing Norman through a table. Norman finds a fire extinguisher to blast Meng with, only to have hardcore guys Fit Finlay and Brian Knobbs show up to beat Meng down. A shot to the head with some kind of a metal bar is enough to knock Meng out, allowing Norman to come out from under a table and retain the title.

 

Rating: D-. These are the same kind of matches that the WWF was having at the time and they were doing them much better. The problem here is that these matches are done over and over again and they just aren’t funny anymore. Norman constantly ran around while screaming, only to win the title due to some shocking coincidence. Nothing to see here, again.

 

David Flair, Ric’s son, is presented with a golden crowbar as a gift. Ok then.

 

Punk band The Misfits kidnaps Oklahoma, a character designed to make fun of WWF announcer Jim Ross. This will be explained better in a bit.

 

We recap the Revolution vs. Jim Duggan. Fed up with never getting elevated up the card, Perry Saturn, Chris Benoit, Dean Malenko and Shane Douglas formed a group called the Revolution, which was designed to rebel against the established veterans to take their spot on the top of the card. WCW, in its infinite wisdom, turned them into an anti-American group who declared statehood, thereby ticking off patriot (and resident WCW janitor) Jim Duggan. Duggan will have mystery partners for an eight man tag tonight.

 

Jim Duggan/???/???/??? vs. Revolution

 

Oh and if Duggan loses, the Revolution has to do his janitor job for thirty days, but if Duggan loses he has to renounce his citizenship on Nitro. Duggan’s partners are…..the Varsity Club. Yes, the same three guys (Rick Steiner, Kevin Sullivan and Mike Rotundo) from 1988 are back again for absolutely no apparent reason. Instead of Shane in the match, it’s WCW’s version of WWF bodybuilding chick Chyna, named Asya. Get the joke? Also Benoit isn’t here because of the US Title match later tonight.

 

Duggan wants to start the match himself so he sticks his tongue out at the Varsity Club. Saturn starts for the Revolution and gets pounded down by Duggan so it’s Malenko’s turn. Jim beats him down as well with the Three Point Clothesline but he doesn’t seem interested in tagging. The Varsity Club yells at him and you can feel the heel turn coming from here. Saturn comes in again with a springboard missile dropkick to take Duggan down.

 

The Revolution takes turns beating on Duggan in the corner as this is rapidly going nowhere. Dean hits him with the Revolution flag and even Asya gets in some shots of her own. The Varsity Club finally gets bored of standing on the apron and everything breaks down. To the shock of no one paying attention, the former heel stable turns on Duggan and lays him out, allowing Douglas to come in and steal the pin.

 

Rating: D. As predicted, no one knew who the Varsity Club was so no one cared when they turned on him. Why Duggan would pick them as partners is beyond me, but as mentioned he wasn’t that bright. This was a waste of Malenko and Saturn, which is a big part of why the bailed to the WWF along with Guerrero and Benoit in about a month.

 

The Misfits have Oklahoma in a one man cage and berate him a bit.

 

Vampiro vs. Steve Williams

 

The Misfits are Vampiro’s friends and Williams is Oklahoma’s heavy. Oklahoma is designed to do one thing and one thing only: make fun of Jim Ross. Vampiro gets five minutes against Oklahoma is he wins, but since Oklahoma has a mic on we have to hear him talk during the match. Vampiro climbs on top of the cage to start and dives down onto Williams before whipping him into the barricade. A kick to the face staggers Doc and we head inside for the first time.

 

Vampiro pounds on Williams as this is already going nowhere, much like the majority of the card tonight. Doc fires back with some chops, causing Oklahoma to shout CHOP CHOP CHOP because that’s FUNNY you see. Williams hits some shoulder blocks but misses a splash in the corner. A suplex puts Williams down but as Vampiro goes up, Doc pops up with a superplex, nearly breaking Vampiro’s neck in the process. That’s enough for the wrestling so here are the Misfits to distract Williams. Vampiro kicks Doc down but a second kick is caught in a suplex. Williams pounds away until he shoves the referee for the lame DQ.

 

Rating: D. So to be clear, Vampiro was supposed to be a big deal in WCW around this time, so let’s have him get destroyed by someone who hasn’t been around in years for the sake of pushing a feud to make fun of someone who isn’t even in this company anymore. Did I mention that 1999 was a really stupid year for WCW?

 

The five minute clock immediately starts despite Oklahoma being in the cage still.

 

Vampiro vs. Oklahoma

 

To further the stupidity, Williams beats Vampiro up for about two more minutes while Oklahoma spouts off stupid jokes from inside the cage. Oklahoma finally gets out and drops Vampiro again with a DDT before stomping away in the corner. Vampiro gets up so Oklahoma runs, only to have the Misfits throw him back in. After a few low blows from Oklahoma (yeah the announcer is hanging in there with a wrestler. Why are you surprised?), Vampiro hits a Nail in the Coffin (Michinoku Driver) for the pin. They weren’t even “fighting” for a minute.

 

The Powers That Be (the faceless bosses of the company) talk to Creative Control/Curt Hennig, telling them to go become #1 contenders in the six man tag. The faceless voice seems distracted and says something big is going down tonight.

 

Harlem Heat and Midnight, a big muscular chick that no one cared about, get in an argument before said six man. Stevie walks out due to Midnight.

 

Harlem Heat/Midnight vs. Creative Control/Curt Hennig

 

It’s a handicap match because Stevie is gone. Creative Control is a pair of big bald twins named Gerald and Patrick who have teamed for years under a variety of names. The winning team here become number one contenders to the tag belts. Booker and we’ll say Patrick start things off with Booker being shoved into the corner. Booker fights back with a spin kick to the head for two but the twins double team Booker by working on his ribs. Gerald gets taken down by a forearm and put in an armbar before it’s off to Midnight.

 

She stays on the arm but gets taken into the corner and pounded with some shoulders. Booker comes in very quickly but is tripped up by Patrick as the heels quickly take over. Curt comes in for all of five seconds before it’s back to Gerald who gets two off a big boot. Patrick comes in again and gets caught by an ax kick for two before Midnight gets another tag. Hennig comes in again and after ducking a leapfrog, decks Midnight in the back of the head to knock her to the floor.

 

Curt stays on Midnight as the fans simply don’t care. The announcers talk about the big deal that the Powers That be were talking about with Hudson asking what could be bigger than Disco Inferno being thrown in a car. Like I said, 1999 was very stupid. Stevie finally comes out but Booker tells him to leave, which Stevie does.

 

Patrick comes back in for a slam and a series of elbow drops. Booker makes the save as Stevie is still at ringside. Patrick misses a middle rope elbow drop and there’s the tag to Booker, but the referee is with Stevie. Booker cleans house but Curt hits him in the head with a foreign object, allowing Gerald to get the pin.

 

Rating: D. This is yet ANOTHER match that could have been on Nitro and had no business here at all. That’s the problem with almost everything so far: it’s either stupid or WAY too short to mean anything at all. Other than the opener, nothing has lasted more than nine minutes so far which makes it hard to get interested in anything.

 

We recap Dustin Rhodes vs. Jeff Jarrett. Rhodes had returned as a man in black and white named Seven who was based on the seven deadly sins. That sounds interesting, so Dustin dropped the gimmick and became just Dustin Rhodes, who isn’t interesting no matter how many times you remind us that he’s Dusty’s son. Jeff Jarrett is tired of him so tonight it’s a Bunkhouse Brawl, meaning hardcore match.

 

Dustin is in the back and complaining about his father not working here anymore when Jarrett jumps him to start the match.

 

Jeff Jarrett vs. Dustin Rhodes

 

Jarrett takes it back into the arena and runs Rhodes over with a wheelbarrow full of guitars. Dustin is wheeled into the barricade but Rhodes comes back with a cold drink to the face. They head inside with Dustin getting in some shots to the back with a wooden stick. It’s time for the bullrope and cowbell because that’s what guys from Texas use. They head outside again with Jeff being pounded on the announce table and being pulled into the post by the rope.

 

Back in and Dustin throws powder into Jeff’s eyes before pulling out some duct tape. Oh wait first of all let’s have a few whips with a belt and beat up the referee. The referee is taped to the ropes but Jeff is still blinded by the powder. Jeff gets in a shot to the ribs as Curt Hennig comes out to untie the referee. A wooden stick is broken over Rhodes’ back before Jeff puts on a sleeper. Back up and Dustin gets two off a quick belly to belly suplex as the fans are REALLY restless now.

 

Dustin gets a rollup but Hennig breaks it up to give Jarrett a near fall of his own. Back up and Dustin hits Shattered Dreams on Jarrett (if you don’t know what that is, keep it that way) but Hennig pulls the referee out. Curt has his own dreams shattered but Dustin is backdropped to the floor by Jeff. They head up to the set and climb up the structure before hopping back down. Hennig is back again but gets bulldogged on the concrete. Jarrett climbs up on the set with a guitar to crack Dustin in the head for the pin.

 

Rating: D+. This is one of the best matches of the night so far. Let that sink in for a minute. This is also the first match to break ten minutes tonight and we’re eight matches into the show. These hardcore matches are getting really hard to sit through as they’re getting repetitive and there’s such little focus on story that it’s almost impossible to get into them.

 

DDP promises to beat up David Flair with the crowbar.

 

David Flair vs. Diamond Dallas Page

 

This is a crowbar on a pole match, meaning if you climb the pole and bring the crowbar down, you can use it on the other guy. They’re fighting because DDP took out Ric Flair, sending David into insanity. David brings his own crowbar to attack Page from behind. The referee takes it away which should be considered theft when you think about it. Apparently Page can’t continue but he shoves the announcer before the match can end, so let’s get going with the bell. How can you not continue a match that hasn’t started yet?

 

As I try to figure that out, Flair stomps on Page in the corner but gets rolled up for two. A sunset flip is easily blocked by a Page right hand so Flair takes him down with a DDT for two. DDP gets up and pounds away in the corner, only to be clotheslined down for two. The announcers are shocked at Flair’s abilities, as before this he had been a complete joke (and US Champion but the less said about that the better).

 

Page clotheslines him down but can’t follow up. David gets up first and puts on a figure four, only to have it reversed a few seconds later. There’s the crowbar (which was maybe seven feet above the mat, making the “climb” a joke) but a single swing misses, allowing the Diamond Cutter to end David quick.

 

Rating: F. ANOTHER worthless match here that didn’t even break four minutes. The crowbar wasn’t a factor whatsoever, making me wonder why this match even existed. That’s what this show can be summed up as: a bunch of quick ideas which have no time to develop, meaning that as soon as they’re done you forget about them because they didn’t have enough time to mean anything.

 

Post match Page hits a Diamond Cutter off the top rope but as he lifts the crowbar, a fan who is obsessed with Flair comes in for the save. She would be revealed as Daffney soon after this.

 

We recap Sting vs. Total Package (Lex Luger) which is all about Elizabeth. The idea is Luger abuses her by making her wrestle in dangerous or humiliating matches, so tonight her contract with Luger is on the line in Sting vs. Luger’s match.

 

Sting vs. The Total Package

 

Luger changed his name to the Total Package (his nickname for years), which was supposed to make him a TOTALLY different guy. This worked about as well as you would expect given that by this point, Luger was pretty much a parody of himself. Before the match, Sting gives Liz a SPECIAL can of mace to use just in case something happens. Luger jumps Sting as he comes in before stomping away. Sting is sent to the floor and rammed into the apron for good measure.

 

Back in and Luger pounds Sting down for two as he keeps looking out at Liz. Sting no sells a ram into the corner as Liz is now on the apron. A suplex is no sold as well and Luger gets pinballed back and forth between Sting and Liz. Sting and Luger clothesline each other down and Liz has the mace. She goes to turn on Sting (a running joke at this point) but the can is silly string, because for the first time ever, STING OUTSMARTED SOMEONE! Liz bails and Sting pounds away on Luger with an atomic drop and top rope splash for two. There are two Stinger Splashes but Liz comes in for the DQ.

 

Rating: D. This was a one joke match and while the joke was good, it was clear that neither guy was interested in doing anything here. It’s another match not even making it to six minutes, which makes you wonder why this match needed to be on PPV at all. Luger deteriorated so far in just a few months that it was uncanny.

 

Liz hits Sting in the jaw with the bat, knocking him out cold. Luger crushes Sting’s wrist with a chair, putting him out until March.

 

Sid vs. Kevin Nash

 

This is a powerbomb match, meaning the first person to hit the move wins. Basically they’re fighting because they’re both big and both use the same move. Nash is one half of the tag champions with the injured Hall. Nash takes him into the corner to start and fires off his usual knees to the ribs and elbows to the jaw. They botch a double clothesline as only Sid goes down. Back up and a low blow stops Sid’s powerbomb attempt, sending him to the floor. Nash has one blocked on the floor as well before Sid rams him back first into the apron a few times.

 

Nash is sent into the barricade a few times as this is already very slow paced. A chair to the back keeps Nash down again and Sid yells at the fans a lot. Back in and a clothesline puts Nash down and there’s a legdrop for good measure. Sid fails at starting a powerbomb chant but Nash pokes him in the eye. There goes the referee as you would expect, followed by a horrible looking powerbomb by Sid. Cue Jeff Jarrett to break a guitar over Sid’s head as the referee wakes up. Nash can’t get Sid up so he tells the referee he powerbombed Sid…..AND THAT’s GOOD ENOUGH FOR THE REFEREE, meaning Nash wins.

 

Rating: F. There was a match designed to keep either guy from having to be pinned, and the match was won because Nash said that he powerbombed the other guy. The fact that this company survived the year 2000 is absolutely stunning considering how long these same guys were on top.

 

Benoit says the open challenge hasn’t been answered yet but he’s heading to the ring to face somebody.

 

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. ???

 

This is a ladder match, meaning the belt is hanging from the ceiling and you have to climb a ladder to bring it down. And it’s Jeff Jarrett. The roster is as stacked as it is so we have Jarrett appear in his third match of the night. You couldn’t possibly throw Booker T or Malenko or someone like that out there right? Tony: “Jeff Jarrett? Again?” Benoit is cool with fighting Jarrett and brings him in for a hard clothesline and an elbow to the face. A backbreaker takes Jeff down and a superplex does it even better.

 

Benoit brings in the first ladder but Jeff baseball slides it into Chris’ ribs before blasting him in the face to take over. Back inside and the ladder is set up in the corner but it’s Jeff being whipped into it by Benoit. The champion heads up for the belt but Jeff pulls Benoit down and crotches him on the top rope. The earlier ladder shot to Benoit’s head has busted him open. Benoit is whipped into the ladder in the corner but he comes right back for a whip of his own to put Jarrett down.

 

Jeff responds by putting Benoit in the ladder and dropping it back onto the champion in a painful looking landing. Benoit comes back by tying Jarrett’s legs in the ladder and hanging him upside down, only to have Jarrett shake Benoit off the ladder to put both guys down. Jarrett goes up again but gets dumped off, only to do the exact same thing to Benoit a few moments later.

 

Benoit gets up and shoves the ladder down again, sending a climbing Jeff down onto the ropes. Chris goes up but Jeff dropkicks the ladder from the top rope, sending Benoit crashing down in a scary fall. Back up again and Benoit rams the ladder into Jarrett’s face to put him down, allowing Chris to climb up…..and hit a Swan Dive headbutt to knock Jarrett out even colder. Benoit climbs up and keeps the title.

 

Rating: B-. It’s not great but this is by far and away the best match of the night so far. The fact that there wasn’t a boring and stupid story to this helped it a lot. Instead of having to adjust to some idiotic idea, they just went out there and beat each other up for ten minutes. Given what we’ve had to sit through on this show so far, that’s the best thing they could have done.

 

Bret says he’ll win because he wants to prove how great he is.

 

WCW World Title: Bret Hart vs. Goldberg

 

Bret is defending and this is No DQ. He won the title at Mayhem in November and Goldberg wanted a shot, so for some reason they won the tag titles, only to lose them in a few weeks. Ignoring the fact that it took two years for Bret to win the WCW Title, I’ve heard worse ideas for the main event of the biggest show of the year. Goldberg is the more popular guy but they’re both mostly good guys. They shake hands and we’re ready to go.

 

Feeling out process to start until Goldberg shoves him to the floor with ease. Back in and Bret headlocks him down to the mat, only to have Goldberg fight up and hit a gorilla press into a powerslam to wake the crowd up a bit. A clothesline puts Bret down and Goldberg puts on a leg lock, only to be countered into a Sharpshooter attempt. Goldberg kicks him away and they head to the floor where the referee is bumped less than five minutes into the match.

 

A second referee comes out as Bret is dropped onto the barricade chest face. Back inside and a big boot to the face puts Bret down. A powerslam looks to do the same….and there goes the second referee. Bret avoids the spear and puts the Figure Four on around the post. There’s a third referee in (remember we’re maybe seven minutes into this at most) as Bret drops the hold around the post. Back in and Bret goes after the leg by cannonballing down onto it and bending the leg around the ropes.

 

Off to a figure four by Bret and Goldberg is in trouble. The fans chant his name and Goldberg turns it over. Bret makes the rope….which shouldn’t mean anything in a No DQ match but what has made sense tonight? Bret stays on the leg in the corner but Goldberg chokes him into the corner and pounds away, only to knock down the third referee.

 

In the famous moment of the match, Goldberg hits a superkick to Bret’s head, giving Bret such a concussion that his career basically ended right there. Bret would wrestle five more times in WCW in the next three weeks and then not again for over ten years. Anyway, the spear puts Bret down and here’s Roddy Piper to be referee. The distraction legs Bret hit him in the knee and load up the Sharpshooter…..and it’s Montreal AGAIN, with Piper calling for the bell before Bret can turn the hold over.

 

Rating: C-. Bret killing kick aside, this wasn’t much to see. The leg work was fine and looked to be setting up an interesting ending, but why do that when you can have ANOTHER Montreal Screwjob moment? The match watch wasn’t too bad, but after two hours of drek like we’ve just sat through, you need something WAY better than this.

 

Overall Rating: F. As in failure. That’s what this show was on almost all levels. The ladder match is quite good (imagine that: two guys who were 32 at this time had the best match of the night) and the opening tag match is watchable. There’s your biggest problem: arguably the second best match of the night is the Disco Inferno and Lash Leroux vs. the Marinara Goon Squad.

 

Like I said, there are thirteen matches on the card and three of them (Bunkhouse, ladder, world title) break ten minutes. Everything else goes by so fast that you don’t have time to determine if it’s good or bad. All you know is that something happened, but so much other stuff is flying at you that you can’t process anything else. That’s Russo booking 101: throw everything you can at the audience and hope they like something instead of slowing down a bit and letting a good show develop. Terrible show which illustrates everything wrong with the company at the moment.

 

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Thunder – March 19, 1998: If This Is The B Show, I Don’t Want To See The C Show

Thunder
Date: March 19, 1998
Location: Hullman Center, Terra Haute, Indiana
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Lee Marshall, Bobby Heenan

We’re back on dry land for Thunder now and headed towards Spring Stampede. After both Uncensored and Nitro two things are clear: the NWO is fighting and no matter how sick of it we are, there’s no way we’re getting away from it. Other than that there’s a lot of good stuff going on in the midcard, but we have to get through all the NWO stuff to get there. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of Nitro.

The announcers talk for a LONG time, as in like two minutes straight. The only thing to come out of this is Sting vs. Savage for the title at Spring Stampede.

Cruiserweight Title: Chris Jericho vs. Super Calo

Jericho says he loves Terry Hutt Indiana. Calo jumps him from behind to start but Jericho easily punches him down to get a breather. A clothesline puts Jericho down for two and Calo hits an ax handle to the back to send him to the floor. Jericho is back in a few seconds later and hits a quick vertical suplex for two (arrogantly of course).

A slingshot splash gets two more on Calo and a spinwheel kick in the corner has Calo in even more trouble. We hit a quick chinlock but Super is quickly up and knocking Jericho out to the floor. There’s a big suicide dive which gets two back inside and a middle rope missile dropkick gets the same for Calo. Jericho ducks under a cross body and it’s the Liontamer for the submission.

Rating: D+. Jericho is awesome at this point but he needs someone better than Calo to get a good match. Calo was sluggish out there and didn’t look to be all that interested in the match. Also Jericho didn’t even steal that stupid hat from Calo for the trophy case so there isn’t much good out of this.

Kendall Windham vs. El Dandy

Seriously? Did the booker owe these guys a favor or something? The match actually starts during the break with Kendall pounding away. They head to the outside with Kendall in control but the crowd is looking away. Here’s Raven with the Flock and the US Title belt. Apparently he stole it last night on MTV and we’ll get a clip showing what happened later on. Dandy comes back with some cross bodies but gets bulldogged down for the pin in a short match.

Hennig and Rude come out to talk about Curt vs. Rick Steiner later tonight. Hogan has sent them on a mission to destroy Bret Hart and you don’t see him here anymore. The town is insulted and they talk about ruling wrestling for fifteen years. Not much to say here.

Perry Saturn vs. La Parka

La Parka comes out with the chair and wearing something that looks like an apron. In a smart move, Saturn clotheslines La Parka out of his boots during the dance to take over. A suplex gets two for Saturn and it’s off to a Fujiwara Armbar. Saturn fires off kicks in the corner but La Parka comes back with a kind of bulldog for two. The Skeleton guy gets no elevation on a leapfrog and nearly breaks Saturn’s neck in a cringe inducing botch.

An enziguri staggers Saturn and La Parka leverages him to the floor. Lodi goes to help Saturn up but La Parka dives onto both of them. Back in and a corkscrew dive takes Saturn down before the chair is brought in. Saturn dropkicks La Parka in the back, sending him face first into the chair. The Rings of Saturn go on and we’re done.

Rating: C-. Saturn nearly being crippled aside this wasn’t much to see. As is typically the case with WCW, they’re handed someone getting themselves over like La Parka and they do nothing with it. Saturn was his usual solid self here but it was just a step above a squash. Lodi continues to have the most heat of the entire Flock.

We get a clip of Page’s interview on MTV last night. Raven hijacks the feed on the monitor they’re watching and wants to know why he isn’t champion. Page says he banged him and gets some looks from the hosts. Raven’s video gets some static and he thinks it’s a conspiracy. “The Foo Fighters don’t get static!” He says he’s going to rip Page off and shows up on set with a stop sign to knock Page out. The Even Flow puts Page through a coffee table and Raven takes the belt.

Barry Darsow vs. Ray Traylor

It’s like a nightmare from WWF house shows past. Darsow hits a quick knee lift and falls backwards from the impact before getting punched down by Traylor. The slide under the rope into the uppercut puts Darsow down again but he avoids a splash. Barry wraps the arm around the post and stomps at the shoulder a bit. A belly to back suplex gets two but Darsow can’t hook an arm hold called Barely Legal. Ray comes back with a one armed slam and a Boss Man Slam for the pin.

Rating: D. To recap, we’ve had to sit through Kendall Windham and Barry Darsow matches tonight. I’m starting to understand the hatred for this show that so many fans have. As for the match there wasn’t much here but at least it was more competitive than I was expecting. Why they needed Barry Darsow here instead of say Vincent is beyond me.

Roddy Piper will be on Nitro to make a challenge. I think we have our topic for the rest of the show.

Yuji Nagata vs. Prince Iaukea

They trade arm holds to start until Nagata grabs a headscissors. Nagata wins a chop off and sends Prince to the apron, only to be caught by a springboard flip attack. Yuji fires off some kicks before cranking on the arm. A cross armbreaker has Prince in trouble but the announcers are still wondering what Piper’s announcement will be. Tony thinks it might be about the NWO. There’s a fresh idea.

Anyway Iaukea gets to the ropes but a double chop brings him right back down to the mat. Back to the arm followed by some lame ground and pound and more shots into the bad arm from Nagata. Another Prince comeback is stopped by a rake of the eyes and a great looking belly to back from Nagata. Prince comes back again with a dropkick, drawing Sonny Onoo to the apron. He accidentally kicks Yuji in the head, allowing Iaukea to hook a northern lights suplex for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was fine from a technical standpoint but could they have picked two less interesting guys? It was generic Polynesian guy vs. generic Japanese guy and it’s going to wind up being the longest match on the show tonight (5:20). We’re five matches into this show and a La Parka match is the only thing remotely decent. That can’t be a good sign.

We get some clips from Nash s. Giant on Sunday.

Brian Adams vs. Marty Jannetty

This sounds like a reject from a Survivor Series Showdown in 1990. Adams quickly blasts him to the floor before throwing him back inside with ease. Marty avoids a charge in the corner but is quickly caught in a bearhug for a few moments. Jannetty keeps trying to run the ropes but gets thrown around the ring with ease. A headbutt puts Marty down again but rolls away from a knee drop. Jannetty makes a quick comeback with an atomic drop and missile dropkick for two before hooking a lame sleeper. Adams shrugs him off and hits a very bad looking tilt-a-whirl powerslam for the pin.

Rating: D. Dang those connections must be strong for Adams. The guy just isn’t anything of note but he keeps getting TV time and wins like this one here. Scott Norton may be pushed way too strong but he’s a lot less generic than Adams. Nothing to see here as this show continues to drag along.

Video of Sting’s entrance from Nitro.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Psychosis

Mike Tenay has replaced Lee Marshall. Eddie grabs the arm to start and clotheslines him down. Psychosis comes back with a quick snapmare as things speed up, only to be stopped with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker from Guerrero. Eddie is taken down by a quick armdrag as the pace picks up again. Guerrero showboats too much though and gets dropkicked in the back, setting up the guillotine legdrop in the ropes.

Instead of covering though Psychosis kicks him to the floor and hits a Whisper in the Wind off the top. Psychosis slingshots back in with an elbow drop for two and a tilt-a-whirl slam looks to set up another Whisper but Eddie sidesteps him. Eddie shoves Psychosis off the top and lays him out with the frog splash for the pin.

Rating: C. After the string of bad matches tonight I’d take anything decent right now. These two were moving well out there and the high spots looked good. Eddie continues to be one of the top guys who never gets a title but that’s what you have to expect in WCW. Entertaining little match here.

Raven vs. Brad Armstrong

Raven has the US Title here with him and Tony makes sure to tell us that he is NOT the champion. Hammer and Reese come in before the bell and beat Armstrong down which is legal anyway as it’s Raven’s Rules. Raven says this is Armstrong’s second chance but Page doesn’t deserve one. Last night on MTV it was Matthew McConaughey, the Foo Fighters and Page. It should have been Raven as the star of that show, so he crushed Page’s head with a stop sign. Raven will grow stronger and Page will grow weaker. There’s the Even Flow to Armstrong and a bell so I guess this was a match.

Video on Bret Hart.

Scott Norton vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit fires off chops in the corner to start but Norton takes him into the other corner across the ring before clotheslining him down. Now it’s Norton with chops of his own to knock Benoit off his feet. It’s time for the generic power offense from Norton, such as forearms to the back, a headbutt and more clotheslines. A hard clothesline puts Benoit down and a powerslam gets two.

Norton hits something resembling a Samoan drop for two more as this is one sided so far. Back up and Benoit avoids a charge in the corner and takes Norton down with a German suplex before going up top for the Swan Dive. He hooks on the Crossface but Vincent gets on the apron, making Benoit break the hold after a LONG time. The distraction lets Norton pop up, not sell the hold at all, and lay out Benoit with the shoulder breaker for the pin.

Rating: D. SERIOUSLY? You take Benoit out of the hottest feud of the year so you can have SCOTT NORTON squash him in five minutes? Norton was in the Crossface for a good ten seconds and didn’t even have his arm raised, then he gets to pin Benoit clean after his finisher? What in the world does Norton have on the people that run this company? It makes even less sense as Norton never went anywhere in WCW, so was this match only there to bring Benoit down? It certainly seems that way.

Goldberg vs. Wayne Bloom

The place EXPLODES for Goldberg and you can actually seem them all on their feet. For the first time ever, we get a number for Goldberg’s wins. He’s 55-0 coming into this match which is higher than I expected. A full nelson has Bloom in early trouble and there’s a pumphandle slam for good measure. Bloom fires off some right hands but gets caught by the spear. There’s the Jackhammer to make it 56-0. This is one of Goldberg’s longer matches, going a full eighty seconds.

Saturn jumps the railing but just stares at Goldberg.

Rick Steiner vs. Curt Hennig

That’s not much of a main event. Rick easily runs Hennig over and hiptosses him down, sending Curt to the floor for a Rude conference. Rick will have none of that and pulls Curt back in by the hair. A quick powerslam looks to set up the Steiner Bulldog but Rude pulls Steiner’s leg and it’s thrown out after less than a minute and a half.

Steiner fights them off for as long as he can but the B-Tea comes in to help Curt and Rude. Ray Traylor comes out and is beaten down as well until GOLDBERG makes the save, blowing the roof off the place. A double spear takes out Hennig and Adams and there’s one for Norton as well. Goldberg walks out, leaving Steiner and Traylor to clean house. The announcers are THRILLED to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This show SUCKED until the end with nothing to see and a lot of stupid matches. The Norton vs. Benoit match continues to make me shake my head but that’s life in WCW. Goldberg coming in was a breath of fresh air for this show and the crowd went nuts for him. Good ending to a horrible show.

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Summerslam Count-Up – 1997: Spoils of the Border War

Summerslam 1997
Date: August 3, 1997
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 20,213
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon, Jim Ross

We’re in a very different era now as the WWF has finally realized they needed to step things up against WCW. The result was the rise of Steve Austin in his war against the Hart Foundation. Tonight we have a main event of the now heel Bret challenging Undertaker for the world title with Shawn as guest referee along with the match that changed the wrestling world forever. Let’s get to it.

We open with the Star Spangled Banner which isn’t done often enough on PPV broadcasts.

The opening video talks about how heroes aren’t forever with a focus on Bret going from the top of the world to America’s public enemy #1 and Undertaker having to deal with a nightmare from his past.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Mankind

This is in a cage match and the continuation of a great feud. HHH beat Mankind to win the King of the Ring but had to cheat to do it, sending Mankind after revenge. You can only win by escape which I always like. Mankind is also one half of the tag team champions as Dude Love at this point. Helmsley dives for the door but Mankind makes an easy save. He pulls HHH off the cage wall and pounds HHH down into the corner. The running knee into HHH’s head gives us a BANG BANG as this is one sided so far.

A Texas Piledriver puts HHH down but Mankind says close the door. There’s the Mandible Claw but Chyna reaches through the bars to break it up. HHH can’t get going though as a discus lariat puts him right back down. Mankind tries to climb out but Chyna hits him in the leg, allowing Helmsley to superplex him down from the top of the cage in a big spot. Instead of leaving though HHH sends Mankind HARD into the cage and gives us a little curtsey.

More whipping into the cage ensues and HHH pounds away on Mankind’s head. You could see the mean streak starting in HHH years before it really came out. The cage is especially loud tonight which makes the shots into it sound far more brutal. HHH goes up but gets caught by the head and dragged back inside. A hard kick to the side of the head puts HHH down but Chyna interferes AGAIN with a forearm to the head. Mankind comes back with a pair of atomic drops but he walks into the facebuster to stop the momentum again.

In a creative move Mankind suplexes HHH against the cage, causing his the future Game’s legs to hang over the top. A running knee to HHH’s upside down chest brings him down and it’s time to taste the cage. HHH catches Mankind charging in with a backdrop into the cage and they both climb to the top rope. Mankind wins a slugout by crotching HHH but the landing knocks Mankind off the ropes too.

HHH’s leg is tied in the ropes but Chyna slams the door on his head to make ANOTHER save. Now she rams the referee into the steps and throws a chair in to HHH. Mankind blocks a Pedigree onto the chair and catapults HHH into the cage, knocking Chyna down to the floor. A double arm DDT onto the chair puts HHH down but Mankind can’t follow up.

Chyna comes inside and tries to drag HHH out as Mankind climbs over the top. He gets down to the apron and takes off his mask but climbs back up. The fans chant SUPERFLY as Mankind goes up, rips open his shirt to reveal a Dude Love heart, and drops an elbow off the top of the cage. Mankind climbs out and reaches the floor just before Chyna can drag HHH out to the floor.

Rating: A-. This was great stuff with Mankind overcoming everything HHH and Chyna could throw at him before hitting the huge spot to win it. There was a very good story built up between these two which would finally be blown off in a street fight at the first Raw in MSG. Great opener here and the fans were WAY into it. You could see the future in these two and it was awesome.

Post match Mankind collapses on the floor next to the cage. The Dude Love music starts playing and Mankind’s foot starts tapping. He gets up and struts to the back as Dude. The Foley character really was brilliant as he wasn’t playing three different characters but rather one with multiple personalities. That’s awesome when you think about it.

Call the Hotline!

Todd Pettingill (he still had a job at this point?) brings out the governor along with Gorilla Monsoon and the Headbangers for some reason. She got rid of some entertainment tax on wrestling shows to allow the first show in New Jersey since the 80s. Gorilla gives her a WWF Championship belt as a thank you present.

We recap Goldust vs. Brian Pillman….which is to say we hear about the stipulation: if Pillman loses he has to wear a dress until he wins again.

Video on the local festivities leading up to Summerslam.

Goldust vs. Brian Pillman

Goldust is a face by this point. Pillman jumps him to start but Goldust hits a jumping back elbow out of the corner. He pounds on Brian in the corner and kisses him to the floor but Pillman is ticked off. Brian drops Goldust with a clothesline and goes after Malena, only to be headed off by Goldie with an uppercut. Back in and Pillman takes him down with a snap suplex but Goldust crotches him off the top.

Marlena blows cigar smoke in Pillman’s face, causing him to hide behind her and sucker Goldust into a DDT on the floor. A top rope forearm/clothesline gets two for Brian and we hit the chinlock. Pillman looks INSANE which fits the Loose Canon character very well. Back up and a clothesline puts Goldust down for two but Goldie hits one of his own to stagger Pillman. They slug it out with a double fist to the face putting Brian down. The bulldog is blocked and Goldie falls to the outside. He tries a sunset flip as he comes back in and a purse shot from Marlena is enough to pin Pillman.

Rating: D. The match sucked for the most part with no real flow to it at all. This was a long running feud which was supposed to end with Marlena leaving Goldust for Pillman but Brian would be dead in about two months to prevent that from happening. It’s a shame he was so banged up that he never got to realize his potential due to his injuries.

There’s a new attendance record for a WWF event in this arena.

Godwinns vs. Legion of Doom

The Godwinns are in Deliverance mode at this point and the LOD are done with the war against the Hart Foundation and in need of a good feud. Unfortunately there wasn’t a good team for them to feud with so we’re stuck with the Godwinns. Henry had his neck broken in a Doomsday Device months ago, prompting an attack on the LOD. The LOD has sworn revenge to set this up.

The LOD are actually referred to as Road Warriors here which is rare for the WWF. LOD cleans house to start, sending the Godwinns to the floor with Hawk hitting a clothesline off the apron. We get started with Phineas vs. Animal with the latter missing a charge into the corner, allowing the hog dudes to double team him. Animal comes back with a double clothesline of his own to send the Godwinns to the floor.

Off to Henry vs. Hawk with Henry trying to hurt Hawk’s neck as a receipt. Hawk sends him into the steps before dropping some legs for two back inside. Back to Phineas for a hangman’s choke on Hawk to no avail. Animal comes back in to work Henry’s arm before a Cactus clothesline from Animal puts both guys on the floor. Henry knocks Animal into the barricade as they come back in to shift momentum. Lou Albano is in the front row.

Back in and Phineas puts Animal in a bearhug as the crowd gets hot all over again. As the hold continues, Lawler talks about Blue Ball, Arkansas. I really don’t have a joke there but you have to mention that name. Animal breaks free but Henry breaks up the hot tag attempt. Phineas goes up but jumps into a clothesline and now we get the hot tag off to Hawk. House is cleaned as everything breaks down but Phineas breaks up the Doomsday Device on Henry. Not that it matters as the LOD hit a spike piledriver on a guy recovering from a broken neck for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was supposed to be about revenge but the match never acted like that at all. The Godwinns were horrible as heels and this was a very dull match as a result. LOD still had a little bit in the tank here but they were going to explode in the next few months but almost no one cared.

We get clips of fans winning a contest for a shot at a million bucks. The fans are here and get to pick a key to try to open Undertaker’s casket which contains cash. Two more fans are called but one isn’t home and the other is disconnected. We finally get through to someone but nobody wins. Sunny’s cleavage looked GREAT though.

We recap British Bulldog vs. Ken Shamrock which is another spinoff from the Border War. Bulldog was about to lose an arm wrestling match on Monday so he laid Shamrock out with a chair and shoved dog food down his throat.

European Title: Ken Shamrock vs. British Bulldog

Bulldog (defending) has agreed to eat dog food if he loses, but we see a graphic for Bulldog vs. Shawn at One Night Only for the European Title, which foreshadows things a little bit. It’s a power match to start until Shamrock hits a wicked belly to belly, sending Bulldog to the floor. Back in and Shamrock takes him down by the leg but Bulldog is quickly into the ropes. A hard clothesline gets two for Ken but Bulldog gets a boot up in the corner and takes over.

The delayed suplex gets two and we hit the chinlock. The fans chant USA as this hold just keeps going. This is one of those matches that goes on for less than eight minutes but needs to have a fourth of it spent in a chinlock. A small package gets two for the champion and it’s back to the chinlock. Shamrock is sent shoulder first into the post and out to the floor where he comes back with some right hands. Back in and Bulldog pounds away even more and Shamrock is bleeding from the mouth. We hit the third chinlock before going back to the floor for Bulldog to hit him in the face with dogfood. Shamrock snaps and it’s a DQ.

Rating: D. This didn’t do anything for me at all. The match was only seven and a half minutes and we had three chinlocks and two trips to the floor. Shamrock wasn’t ready for a long match yet and Bulldog wasn’t capable of carrying anyone at this point. Nothing to see here but it was just leftovers from the summer anyway.

Post match Shamrock chokes Bulldog out for a VERY long time, to the point where Bulldog would be dead. The referees get suplexes.

Shawn Michaels says he’ll be a fair referee and there’s nothing between him and Bret.

Los Boricuas vs. Disciples of Apocalypse

This is the Puerto Rican gang vs. the bikers as GANG WARZ continue. Vince calls this an eight man tag because he doesn’t care enough about any of these guys. These guys feuded FOREVER and I don’t remember the bikers ever winning a match in the feud. Savio Vega and Crush are the respective leaders and the rest are pretty interchangeable other than Chainz being the only other biker with hair.

It’s a brawl to start of course and the bikers clear the ring. Skull starts with Jose and the big man throws him around with ease. Off to 8 Ball who hits a spinning sidewalk slam before bringing in Crush. Miguel comes in but walks into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for no cover. Back to Skull and 8 Ball (identical twins) to crush Miguel in the corner until Savio cheats to take over. All four Boricuas pound on Skull in the corner until the Nation of Domination (now with Ahmed Johnson) comes down to ringside, basically stopping the match cold.

Jesus hits a Fameasser on Skull to set up another four on one beatdown. We hit a chinlock but 8 Ball breaks it up to prevent further boredom. Skull finally gets over for the tag and everything breaks down. Chainz is sent to the floor and punches Ahmed who responds with a sitout powerbomb on the concrete, giving Miguel an easy pin in the ring.

Rating: D-. Oh man this was dull to sit through. Los Boricuas just weren’t interesting at all and other than Savio they easily could have been interchanged with one another. The bikers weren’t much better but at least you could remember which was which. I guess the idea here was to appeal to a wider fanbase but it didn’t do anything for me.

A 12 man brawl follows.

We recap Austin vs. Owen. Hart is Intercontinental Champion and pinned Austin in the ten man tag main event of Canadian Stampede. Tonight is their one on one showdown and if Austin loses he has to kiss up to Owen shall we say. Think Vince’s special club.

Intercontinental Title: Steve Austin vs. Owen Hart

Owen takes him down by the knee and wraps it around the ring post right after the bell. Back in and Austin fires off right hands and hits the Thesz press before hitting the HARD whip into the corner ala Bret. Austin pulls him around by the hair and stomps the stomach for two. Back up and Austin works the arm with a wristlock as the fans chant USA. Owen does his spinning nip up to counter but Steve casually pokes him in the eye.

Back to the armbar followed by a hammerlock slam to stay on the arm. Owen finally comes back with a jumping elbow to send Austin to the floor. He goes into the post and steps as well before going after Austin’s arm and fingers. Austin is tied in the ropes so Owen can stay on the fingers but Steve busts out a Stun Gun and a powerbomb of all things. A clothesline puts Owen on the floor again and he starts heading to the back. That would mean Austin having to pucker up so the fight continues in the aisle.

Back in and Owen takes over with a quick belly to belly and a neckbreaker for two. A top rope elbow gets two for Hart and we hit the neck crank. Austin fights back and tries a Sharpshooter but Owen goes back to the injured neck to take over again. A German suplex gets two on Austin and it’s off to a camel clutch. Owen lets it go but gets two off a DDT and hooks a chinlock. Austin gets up and they trade sleepers with Austin escaping via a jawbreaker. Hart gets two off a Russian legsweep and it’s back to the chinlock. Owen gets caught cheating and they get up again and then it happens.

Austin tries a tombstone but Owen reverses into one of his own and drops Austin on his head. This is the move that changed wrestling forever as Austin’s neck was pretty much destroyed, resulting in him completely changing his in ring style. Instead of being the well rounded wrestler that he was before, he was forced to create the Attitude Era brawling style which made millions upon millions upon millions of dollars and made Austin one of the biggest stars of all time. On top of that it required a year off for surgery but that wouldn’t come until 1999.

Anyway Austin is temporarily paralyzed so Owen can’t cover him. Hart walks around the ring shouting that Austin is done while Hebner tries to figure out what to do. Austin can move his limbs a bit as Owen tries to start a Canada chant. Austin rolls onto his stomach and in one of the toughest and dumbest moments in wrestling history, he gets the worst rollup of all time for the pin and the title before collapsing again.

Rating: B. Most famous wrestling injury of all time aside, this was a very solid match with both guys clicking very well. I’m assuming Austin was to win with the Stunner as otherwise Owen would have gotten a quick pin and gotten out of there. Austin was clearly going to be the next big thing but no one knew if he would ever walk again let alone wrestle after this match.

Austin can barely move but manages to sit up, only to fall over again. He can’t even stand up right now. Some referees get him to his feet and Austin holds up the title to a BIG pop. It takes a bunch of people to get him to the back and his legs are VERY wobbly.

We recap Bret vs. Undertaker. It’s a very basic idea: Bret was the top heel over the summer and Taker was just kind of around as world champion. Bret says if he doesn’t win the title, he’ll never wrestle in America again. Shawn Michaels is guest referee because he’s the other top guy in the company.

We get the full Canadian national anthem before Taker’s entrance.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Bret Hart

Remember that Shawn is guest referee. Bret hits Undertaker in the back with the belt to start and pounds away but Undertaker throws him away and out to the floor. The champion misses a charge into the post and is sent knees first into the steps by the Canadian. Bret tries to jump off the apron at Taker but is caught in midair and slammed into the post. Back in and Undertaker works on Bret’s back before sending him into the corner a few times.

Off to a bearhug on Hart followed by a big boot to the face, but Taker misses a legdrop. A second big boot misses though and Bret goes after the knee. Hart cannonballs down onto Taker’s knee and kicks the leg out from under the 6’10 champion. As a small sidebar, Vince says that you’re not 6’10 when you’re on the mat. I’m pretty sure he still is actually, but he just can’t use that height advantage.

Hart cranks on the leg even more and puts on the Figure Four for good measure. This brings out Paul Bearer for some reason which angers the champion. Undertaker turns the hold over to escape before going after Bearer. Bret uses the distraction to jump Undertaker from behind and send him into the barricade. There’s the Figure Four around the post by Bret as he stays on Taker’s leg. Owen Hart and Brian Pillman of the Hart Foundation come out to ringside.

Taker’s leg is wrapped around another post and Bret flips off a yelling fan. Shawn hasn’t been a factor as referee yet. Back in and Bret puts on another leg lock but Taker rolls it over and uses the good leg to kick Bret in the face. With no provocation, Undertaker drops to the floor and beats up Owen and Pillman. Back in and there’s the chokeslam but Shawn is watching for more Harts. Bret heads to the floor and rams Undertaker’s back into the apron and post to take over again.

Shawn tells Bret to get back inside or the match is over. They head into the ring again with Bret getting two off a backbreaker. A suplex puts Undertaker down again and there’s the middle rope elbow for two. Bret hits a DDT for the same but Undertaker drops him face first onto the turnbuckle for two of his own. Hart goes after the back again but can’t hook the Sharpshooter. The chokeslam is countered with a kick to the leg but Undertaker hits an uppercut to put Bret down.

Undertaker hits his jumping clothesline to take over again before whipping Bret chest first into the buckle for two. Bret tries to go up but gets chokeslammed down off the top for a close two. Old School is countered and Bret superplexes Undertaker down but he can’t cover. Instead he puts on the Sharpshooter but Undertaker kicks him away, which is the first time the hold has been completely broken. Another clothesline puts Bret down but he escapes the Tombstone and puts on the Sharpshooter around the post in a new move. Taker kicks him off and he crushes Shawn in the process though.

Bret brings a chair into the ring and lays out Undertaker with no Michaels to see it. Shawn limps back into the ring but the count only gets two. Bret erupts on Shawn and flips him off before pounding away in the corner again. Shawn picks up the chair and is spat on by Bret. Shawn swings the chair but knocks Undertaker out cold, giving Bret the pin and the title.

Rating: B+. This took a lot of time to get going but with thirty minutes to use they had more than enough time to waste. Hart winning was definitely the right move after he spent all summer on top of the company. This opened up a lot more options than Taker was providing, which is what a champion is supposed to do.

Post match Undertaker is FURIOUS and goes after Shawn. The Hart Foundation celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This isn’t the worst show in the world but there’s nothing to see here other than the last two matches and the opener. Those matches take up a lot of the card but the rest of the stuff is just dreadful. This set up a lot of important stuff, ranging from the first Hell in a Cell to Kane to Montreal to Shawn breaking his back, but there’s a very clear line between the good stuff and the bad stuff.

Ratings Comparison

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Mankind

Original: A

Redo: A-

Brian Pillman vs. Goldust

Original: D

Redo: D

Legion of Doom vs. Godwinns

Original: C-

Redo: D

British Bulldog vs. Ken Shamrock

Original: D-

Redo: D

Disciples of Apocalypse vs. Los Boricuas

Original: D

Redo: D-

Owen Hart vs. Steve Austin

Original: B

Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Bret Hart

Original: A

Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: C+

About the same other than the world title and the overall rating which doesn’t surprise me. That’s the kind of show this is.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/31/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1997-shawn-vs-taker-begins/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews from Amazon for just $5 at:

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