No Way Out 2007
Date: February 18, 2007
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s that show where WWE pretends that it matters while showing us a commercial for Wrestlemania. The main event is a tag match between the Wrestlemania main events, which should be a quality though unimportant match. Other than that, we are getting a Divas Talent Show, which should be as exciting as it sounds. Let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on the tag match, because that’s about all that matters around here.

Commentary welcomes us to the show, with JBL ranting about the Spanish team.

Chris Benoit/Hardys vs. MVP/MNM

Bonus match which combines….well just one feud as MVP and Benoit haven’t had any major issues. Matt and Mercury slug it out to start until Mercury charges into a raised boot in the corner. The Hardys start taking over on the arm until Mercury pulls him down by the hair. Nitro comes in and gets his arm cranked as well so MVP will try it instead. That’s fine with Benoit, who is right there to slam him down.

MVP gets chopped into the corner and MNM bails away in a hurry. Benoit gets two off a snap suplex and hands it off to Jeff, who gets slowed down by a rake to the eyes. Nitro comes in for the big staredown and suckers Jeff outside, where Mercury gets in a cheap shot. Back in and we hit the chinlock from Nitro, followed by one from Mercury. A suplex gives MVP two but Jeff gets to the corner for a quick Whisper in the Wind. It’s back to Matt to pick up the pace but MVP takes him down into a cravate.

Ballin gets two on Matt and Mercury comes in to go after Matt’s face again. Matt fights out of Nitro’s front facelock and hits a clothesline, allowing the hot tag off to Benoit. A double German suplex drops MNM and everything breaks down. Poetry In Motion hits MVP and another suplex gets two on Mercury. Nitro dives off the apron with a clothesline to Jeff but has to dive back in to break up the Crossface on MVP. Matt saves Benoit from the Snapshot and it’s the Crossface to make Mercury tap.

Rating: B. I can always go for a good six man and they were going pretty fast throughout here. Mixing up a pair of feuds (or at least one feud and two more people) opens up some extra options and keeps things from being the same stuff over and over. Really good opener here and that shouldn’t be the biggest surprise.

Vickie Guerrero has some options and one of her biggest is coming true on Smackdown. She hugs Krystal and thanks her for everything.

Finlay talks with the Leprechaun (who can speak fine here), who is scared of the Boogeyman. Well the Little Boogeyman, because little people are scary. Finlay throws him into a trashcan so he won’t be so scared and then leaves….and the Boogeyman smoke comes up. Little Boogeyman pops up and screaming ensues.

Cruiserweight Title: Cruiserweight Open

Gregory Helms is defending in a gauntlet match. Scotty 2 Hotty is in at #1 and Daivari is in at #2. Daivari sends him into the corner for some right hands but Scotty comes back with the bulldog. There’s the Worm and Daivari is done in a hurry. Gregory Helms is in at #1 and hammers on Scotty, including a catapult to send him throat first into the middle rope. Scotty is back with a belly to back suplex but the Worm is broken up. What would become known as the Codebreaker gets rid of Scotty so it’s Funaki in at #4.

Helms small packages him for the pin in about five seconds and it’s Shannon Moore in at #5. A spinning backbreaker gives Helms a fast two and a belly to belly superplex drops Moore again. Another Codebreaker gets rid of Moore and it’s Jimmy Wang Yang in at #6. Yang goes right after him and hits a standing moonsault for two. A Russian legsweep sets up some weird arm hold on the mat but Helms is back up in a hurry with a hard right hand. Yang grabs a quick hurricanrana for the pin out of nowhere, guaranteeing a new champion.

Jamie Noble is in at #7 as JBL demands more time to talk about Helms losing the title. A hard shot to the face sets up a chinlock on Yang and Noble sends him hard into the post for two. Yang fights back with a few clotheslines and the spinwheel kick for two of his own. The moonsault press gets rid of Noble and Yang thinks he has won….but it’s Chavo Guerrero in at #8 to complete the field.

Chavo uppercuts him down a few times and kicks Yang in the back to take over in a hurry. A spinwheel kick gives Yang a breather and the big dive to the floor drops Chavo again. Back in and Chavo hits Three Amigos, which Cole calls disrespectful for some reason. Yang gets in another shot to the face and goes up, only to miss the twisting moonsault. The frog splash gives Chavo the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. I’m really not a fan of this style as it’s a bunch of mini matches rather than anything getting time. Chavo winning the title is fine, but the rapid fire falls brings up the same thing I always wonder with this format: why is it so much easier to get a fall in this one than in any given match? Either way, at least the title is off of Helms, who was getting hammered with losses that WWE didn’t seem to think counted because he was still champion.

John Cena isn’t worried about teaming with Shawn Michaels tonight. What does have him concerned is facing Batista and Undertaker tonight. As for Michaels, what is going to happen when you can feel this much tension? Cena doesn’t know either.

Finlay/Leprechaun vs. Boogeyman/Little Boogeyman

The Leprechaun is as terrified as you would expect and hides underneath the ring, leaving this as a handicap match. Cole finds it funny, sending JBL into a rant about how Cole is xenophobic for hating Irish people. Boogeyman punches Finlay down to start and they head outside with Finlay being sent into the apron. Back in and Boogeyman hits a powerslam for two, allowing Little Boogeyman to come in for a seated senton. The Leprechaun comes in, puts his hat on Finlay and rolls up his sleeves, allowing Finlay to kick Little Boogeyman in the head.

JBL has no idea what he is watching as Finlay stomps away on Little Boogeyman and grabs a short armscissors. Little Boogeyman gets out and goes underneath the ring, but Boogeyman comes out. Back in and Boogeyman catapults Finlay into the corner and a double splash connects, with the Leprechaun making the save. Boogeyman loads up the worms to chase the Leprechaun off, leaving Finlay to hit the Little Boogeyman with the Shillelagh for the pin.

Rating: D. The goofiness was high with this one but it’s kind of hard to get that angry about it. They made no secret of what they were going for here and the match went about as well as it was going to with all the nuttiness. Finlay and the Leprechaun do well together and it’s kind of funny to have a Little Boogeyman to balance things out. That and Finlay hitting Little Boogeyman in the head with a club was worth a chuckle at the end.

Of note: we are about an hour into the show and Cole’s voice is almost gone. This could be an interesting remaining two hours.

Shawn Michaels says he can’t trust John Cena because he only trusts HHH. No matter what happens tonight though, he has to make sure that nothing happens to Cena until Wrestlemania.

King Booker vs. Kane

Booker has Queen Sharmell in his corner, and we get a quick recap (Booker eliminated Kane from the Royal Rumble after being eliminated himself) during the entrances. Booker tries to run to start but gets caught in the corner for some elbows to the face. Kane doesn’t seem to mind getting hit in the face and takes Booker outside for elbow on the apron. As the beating continues, JBL goes into the Inferno match AGAIN, with Cole asking what JBL would have done to win the match.

The side slam and big boot set up a clothesline to the floor as Booker is still in trouble. Booker gets in a few shots of his own though and a missile dropkick connects for two back inside. The armbar goes on for a bit, followed by a kick to the face to give Booker two. Kane gets chopped down in the corner but he comes back with a suplex for a breather.

Booker kicks him in the ribs but misses the ax kick, allowing Kane to hit a running clothesline. The right hands in the corner rock Booker again and there’s the side slam. Kane’s top rope clothesline (closer to a right hang) draws Sharmell up to the apron and Booker nails the side kick. Not that it matters as Kane pops up with the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: C. Perfectly fine match here as Kane gets a nice boost and King Booker’s run continues to cool off. There isn’t much left for him to do very high up on the card and that makes sense. King Booker wasn’t a gimmick that was going to have a very long term run on top and it has taken its course. Putting someone like Kane over is a good thing, as he could be used to make someone look bigger later.

Batista says Raw is going to lose tonight and he isn’t intimidated by Undertaker, John Cena or Shawn Michaels.

Tag Team Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Deuce and Domino

Deuce and Domino, with Cherry, are challenging after winning back to back non-title matches. Domino drives London into the corner to start and they trade slaps. A jumping elbow drops Domino and it’s off to Kendrick to work on the arm. The champs clear the ring in a hurry and it’s time for a breather on the floor. Back in and Domino gets in a shot from behind on London to take over for the first time.

London gets whipped into some raised knees in the corner and we hit the double arm crank with a knee in the back. Deuce sends London hard into the corner and there’s a double backdrop for two. The chinlock goes on, allowing the referee to go over and say something to Kendrick in a weird visual. London fights up and gets the tag, setting up a quick spinning backslide for two on Deuce. Domino is back in but misses a Doomsday Device clothesline, allowing Kendrick to victory roll Deuce for the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. I liked the match but I’m a bit confused by the ending. This was set up for the title change and there was little reason for them to not change the belts here. London and Kendrick have cooled down a bit in recent weeks and it is time for them to drop the titles already. Deuce and Domino are kind of perfect for that, but I guess they have to be slowed a bit on the way there.

Cole’s voice is barely holding up.

Video on Bobby Lashley’s childhood, which led to his successful amateur wrestling career. This is the same thing that aired on ECW last week.

Mr. Kennedy thinks Bobby Lashley is just like everyone here in Los Angeles: a phony wannabe. Everyone has a dream but he is standing here and they are all out there. He has beaten Lashley before and he can do it again, this time becoming the new ECW World Cha….and here is Lashley to say the one word for Kennedy is halitosis. Lashley drops him too, giving us a great confused Kennedy look.

ECW World Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is defending and Kennedy jumps him from behind during the entrances. That doesn’t exactly work on Lashley, who beats him near the barricade and takes it inside for the opening bell. A backdrop into a slam has Kennedy in more trouble and the delayed vertical suplex gets two. Kennedy slips away though and kicks Lashley down in the corner. Lashley grabs a torture rack but a rake to the eyes gets Kennedy out of trouble.

JBL talks about how this is the Wrestlemania of the future as Kennedy puts on something like a reverse Figure Four (with Lashley face down and Kennedy face up). With that broken up, Kennedy switches to a half crab so Lashley has to grab a rope. Back up and Lashley tries a slam but the leg gives out, allowing Kennedy to take him down again. A running dropkick to the knee gets two, with JBL saying to take notes if you want to be a sports entertainer.

More stomping in the corner sets up a DDT for two as the fans are not exactly thrilled. The half crab goes on again but this time Kennedy lets it go and puts him down again. The Kenton Bomb hits raised knees though and the leg is fine enough for the torture rack into the kneeling backbreaker. Kennedy “accidentally” bumps the referee and takes out Lashley’s leg again before grabbing a chair. Lashley takes it away and hits Kennedy for the lame DQ.

Rating: C-. I don’t get the boring chants from the fans but the ending wasn’t very good. Sure you don’t want Kennedy to take a fall (as he has done enough as of late) so why put them in this situation if that is all you have? They were in a bad place here and the match might not have been thrilling, but it could have been a lot worse. It could have been a lot shorter too, but I don’t think I would have said boring.

Rey Mysterio is back on Smackdown, but just to talk.

The Condemned is coming.

Vinnie Jones, co-star in the Condemned, says he is the real star of the movie and he beat up Steve Austin….presumably in the movie?

The Miz hosts the Divas Talent Invitational, starting with Extreme Expose. They dance, people drool, next act.

Next up is Jillian Hall, who is excited to have her big break in front of these music executives. First she has to warm up and doesn’t like the lack of bass. She sings her original version, with Miz saying she is the female version of William Hung. Jillian goes into a rant about how Extreme Expose couldn’t even be her backup dancers. She goes on about the other women’s “talents” and calls them b******. Cue the rest of the women to beat her up for the catfight, with referees breaking it up.

Ashley comes out with the talent of showing her Playboy cover and taking off her top, revealing strategically placed Playboy Bunny stickers. That’s enough for the win, shockingly enough.

Wrestlemania is All Grown Up. I like that one, though I’m still not sure I get it.

We recap the main event of Undertaker/Batista vs. Shawn Michaels/John Cena. Undertaker won the Royal Rumble and is facing Batista, while Shawn Michaels, the Royal Rumble runner up, is challenging Cena. Take two Wrestlemania main events and make a tag match.

John Cena/Shawn Michaels vs. Batista/Undertaker

Non-title. Shawn comes out to the DX theme and entrance as he continues to reach post-Strike Force Tito Santana levels of not being able to let it go. Batista knocks Cena into the corner to start but Cena comes back with right hands. That earns him a Regal Roll of all things and an early powerslam gets two. Cena avoids a charge into the corner though and it’s off to Shawn to fire off the chops.

That doesn’t last long as Batista powers him down and brings in Undertaker for a quick Old School. Undertaker shoves away the right hands in the corner and gets two off the big boot. Batista comes back in but misses an elbow, allowing the tag back to Cena. Undertaker is right back in as well and you can feel the energy coming up for the showdown. Cena catches Undertaker going up top (that’s a rare one) with a superplex but Undertaker sits back up.

The right hands rock Undertaker, who drops Cena again. This time it’s Undertaker missing an elbow of his own so it’s back to Shawn, who is gorilla pressed out to the floor in the big crash. Back in and Cena makes the save, leaving Shawn to get pounded down in the corner. Shawn gets in a shot to Undertaker’s knee and starts firing off right hands in the corner, as JBL compares this to getting to see WWE vs. WCW. Egads I’d hope it’s better than that.

Batista comes in for a series of clotheslines into a headlock but Shawn manages a running DDT. The hot tag brings in Cena to start cleaning house, including the Shuffle to Batista. Undertaker breaks up the FU and fights outside with Shawn, leaving Batista to hit a spinebuster. The Batista Bomb is broken up by Shawn’s shot to the knee and it’s time to take turns on Batista for a change. Cena blasts him with a clothesline for two as Cole has just stopped talking as his voice is gone. Shawn grabs a front facelock but Batista powers him off without much effort.

That’s not enough for the tag though as Cena is right there with a sleeper on the suddenly busted open Batista. The STFU has Batista in trouble in the middle of the ring, with Undertaker taking his time to make the save. It’s back to Shawn for the top rope elbow but Sweet Chin Music is countered into a swinging Boss Man Slam. That’s enough for the hot tag back to Undertaker as everything breaks down. Undertaker beats up both of them without much trouble….until Batista spinebusters him down. Batista watches from ringside as it’s Sweet Chin Music into the FU to finish Undertaker.

Rating: B. The word for this match is big, as it felt like a match that belonged in a main event spot. It didn’t matter that there were no stakes and it won’t matter until Wrestlemania, but they got into a groove so that it felt like a match between two teams. That made Batista turning on Undertaker at the end feel important, and gives us the closest thing to a villain in the title match, even if it is more of an edgy good guy instead. Heck of a match here and a nice surprise.

Batista stares at Undertaker, who pulls himself up to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The show is bookended by a pair of good matches but the middle is pretty all over the place. What helps this show more than anything else is the complete lack of expectations coming in. There was no reason to expect a good show here and we wound up getting a fine one, though only the opener and main event are really worth seeing. It is time to get ready for Wrestlemania now though, and that could not come soon enough.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: February 9, 2007
Location: Qwest Center, Omaha, Nebraska
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are less than two weeks away from No Way Out and that means it is time to try and make that show mean something. The main event will be a battle of the Wrestlemania main events, which means we get to see the big angle to set up at least one of the Wrestlemania title matches. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Undertaker winning the Royal Rumble and ultimately choosing to face Batista. I know they’re talking about this a lot but it’s kind of a special situation.

Undertaker vs. Miz

That’s a big way to start. Undertaker grabs the arm to start and hits a quick Old School. Miz bails to the floor and the chase is on, with Miz getting in some forearms on the way back inside. That earns him a running big boot and a beating in the corner, followed by the chokeslam. The Tombstone finishes Miz in a hury.

Rating: D+. Total and complete squash here as Miz only got in a few forearms. That’s all it should have been too as Miz is the kind of guy who can get back to whatever level he needs to be at with a few promos. Undertaker is primed up for a Wrestlemania World Title match and it makes sense to show that he is on a roll heading into the show. Not much of a match, but it did what it was supposed to.

Post match, Undertaker gives him the Last Ride through the announcers’ table. That should prove the point.

Rey Mysterio is back in two weeks.

Deuce and Domino vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick

Non-title again and Cherry is here with Deuce and Domino. Kendrick gets knocked into the corner to start and it’s time to forearm him in the back for an early two. We hit a slightly less early chinlock before Domino knees him in the face for two. Deuce comes in and knocks London off the apron, setting up a chinlock of his own.

A jumping kick to the face gets two on Kendrick as this is totally one sided so far. Kendrick kicks him away and brings in London to pick up the pace a bit. Everything breaks down and Kendrick misses a slingshot dive tot he floor. That leaves London to get slammed off the top, setting up a cutter/top rope ax handle combination (that’s a new one) to pin London.

Rating: C-. London and Kendrick have been champions for a long time now and it is time to move on to someone else. Sometimes you need to bring in another team and have them beat everyone, which is what we’re seeing here. This was another nearly one sided match and again, that is what it needed to be.

Maryse, with champagne, welcomes us back from a break.

Commentary talks about Kane vs. King Booker, including a clip of Kane and Booker fighting at the Royal Rumble. Now last week makes a lot more sense.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell want Kane suspended after last week. Long gives him a match at No Way Out instead, which has the two of them hopping mad minus the hopping.

Matt Hardy vs. Joey Mercury

Yes again. Matt knocks him into the corner to start as we hear about a tag team ladder match for the titles at No Way Out, because we haven’t had one of those in a long time. It’s time to go after Mercury’s busted face and we take a break. Back with Matt doing more of the same until he is knocked into the corner. A middle rope faceplant bangs up Matt’s knee and Mercury has a target of his own.

The leg is draped over the rope for a kick to the knee and Mercury starts cranking away. Mercury gets creative by taking the boot off and hits a Robinsdale Crunch on the ankle. Matt catches him on top with a superplex but Mercury is right back on the leg. The bulldog out of the corner gives Matt two more and the middle rope legdrop, with the unbooted foot, gets two. The Side Effect is loaded up but the leg gives out, allowing Matt to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C. Normally I would say they’re done, but we already heard that there is going to be another match involving these two at No Way Out. The Armageddon spot with Mercury’s nose exploding was an incredible visual, but it isn’t like it needs to go on forever like this. Matt had to do this with Gregory Helms and now he is having to do it again with Mercury. Come up with something new.

Here is Mr. Kennedy for a chat. Kennedy has been hearing about how Wrestlemania is going to be Batista’s World Title against the Undertaker’s Streak. That is a match with a lot of buzz but he is the buzzkill. He has beaten both of them on multiple occasions but now he is being overlooked for Wrestlemania. How dare these people overlook him? How dare Undertaker overlook him?

Undertaker may have chosen to face Batista but after tonight, Kennedy is going to Wrestlemania. Batista is overlooking Kennedy because he has a million dollar body but nothing in his head. Tomorrow, Batista’s bags are going to be a lot lighter…and here is Batista for the fight. Security breaks it up and Kennedy uses the distraction to post Batista. This was Kennedy doing what he did best and he was good here.

Finlay vs. Boogeyman

Fallout from Boogeyman trying to kidnap the Leprechaun last week. The gyrations are on to start with Finlay hitting a headbutt….and hurting his own head in the process. They head outside with Finlay being sent head first into the apron but Finlay takes over back inside. Finlay drops some elbows for two but Boogeyman gyrates up.

That earns him a clothesline to put him right back down but Boogeyman knocks him out of the air. Boogeyman hits a powerslam into a splash, followed by a running elbow in the corner. A big boot drops Finlay but here is the Leprechaun to go after the bag of worms. Boogeyman cuts him off and loads up the worms, allowing Finlay to get in a shillelagh shot to the leg for the pin.

Rating: D. This is a good example of why Boogeyman didn’t need to be in the ring very often. The match was awkward and sloppy as they did not exactly seem to be on the same page. The ending means we are likely in for more of this goofy stuff, but it is pretty much the only ridiculous thing on the show at the moment so it could be a lot worse.

We look back at Undertaker massacring Miz earlier.

Gregory Helms vs. Daivari

Non-title and Daivari’s return to Smackdown after a pretty long absence. Helms starts fast and sends him outside as JBL compares Helms to Evander Holyfield. This takes us into a rant about how there are no cruiserweights in boxing, ignoring that Holyfield himself was the undisputed Cruiserweight Champion. Back in and Daivari hammers Helms in the back and we hit the chinlock with a knee between the shoulders.

Helms fights up and is promptly backbreakered down. Daivari misses a guillotine legdrop though and they’re both down for a bit. Helms hits a clothesline and hammers away as JBL points out how quiet the fans are. Another backbreaker gives Helms two but the Nightmare on Helm Street is broken up. A rollup with a grab of the rope gives Daivari the pin.

Rating: C. Just get the title off of Helms already. Much like London and Kendrick, there is nothing left to be done with the title reign, but in this case, there is very little to care about with Helms in the first place. He has held the title so long and barely ever done anything with it, which should tell you almost everything you need to know about the title.

Maryse, from a bed, tells us to keep watching.

Wrestlemania Recall: Pete Rose meets Kane.

Kristal is in Teddy Long’s office and asks how she looks. After taking off a bit of clothing, she asks again (edited off of Peacock), but here is Jillian Hall to interrupt. She wants to sing on American Idol, but Long has a better idea. At No Way Out, we can have a Diva Talent Invitational featuring women from all of the shows. Oh dear.

No Way Out rundown.

Smackdown World Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Batista

Batista is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Kennedy gets shoved down to start and it’s time to hide in the ropes. A hard whip into the corner puts Kennedy down again and Batista seems rather calm. This time it’s Kennedy taking over in the corner but Batista isn’t having any of that and slams him down again. Batista takes him back into the corner and hammers away, including the shoulders to the ribs. Kennedy takes him down by the arm though and we take a break.

Back with Kennedy stomping away and they head outside with Batista being sent into the steps. Kennedy takes too long going up top though and gets caught (as heels do), only to snap Batista’s arm across the top. The Kenton Bomb connects for two and we hit the armbar again.

That’s broken up and a collision puts Kennedy on the floor, where a belt shot knocks Batista silly for two. Batista is fine enough to hit more shoulders in the corner, followed by the spinebuster. That’s good for a very delayed two so Batista hits a running clothesline into a powerslam. There’s another spinebuster and now the Batista Bomb connects to retain the title.

Rating: C+. There was absolutely no drama here but at some point you have to give Kennedy his one on one title shot to get it out of the way. Kennedy has been fluttering around the World Title scene for a long time now and this clears the path to Wrestlemania. Let them do their thing here so the real stuff can take place at Wrestlemania, as it should.

Post match here is Undertaker for the staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was the housekeeping show more than anything else as they had a few things to take care of before we could move on to No Way Out and then Wrestlemania. The two champions losing didn’t help things but it should set up some stuff for No Way Out, which needed the help. Unfortunately there wasn’t much on this show other than a bunch of rematches, but hopefully things can pick up in the next few weeks.
 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: February 2, 2007
Location: Houston, Texas
Attendance: 15,156
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and Undertaker is the only person on his way to Wrestlemania. He doesn’t have an opponent for the show yet though and Batista is the only World Champion he hasn’t stared at yet. Ignoring the fact that there are three World Champions to pick from, it is time for the blue champion to have his turn. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Undertaker winning the Royal Rumble and staring at John Cena and Bobby Lashley, despite Shawn Michaels saying he’s going to Wrestlemania too.

Opening sequence.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Finlay

Benoit is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Finlay drives him up against the ropes to start but gets slapped in the face twice. A clothesline gives Finlay two but Benoit pulls him down into a leglock. Some shots to the face have Finlay in more trouble so he pulls Benoit in by the arm to escape. Finlay forearms him down and grabs a chinlock, which doesn’t last long.

Benoit sends him to the apron and then out to the floor, where Finlay sends him into the steps as we take a break. Back with Finlay working on a half crab, which he doesn’t turn over. Finlay lays on the leg to pull on it some more and then cannonballs down onto it for a bonus. The knee is bent around the post and now we get the full on half crab. Benoit grabs the rope for the break and kicks Finlay in the face for a bonus.

Some chops stagger Finlay but the knee gives out on a suplex attempt. The good leg catches Finlay with an enziguri though and Benoit rolls the German suplexes. The Swan Dive misses though and Finlay grabs a near fall. Finlay pulls the turnbuckle pad off and then goes to grab the Leprechaun….but something pulls the Leprechaun under the ring. Cue the Boogeyman to steal said Leprechaun, allowing Benoit to grab a rollup to retain. Cole: “What is going on?”

Rating: B-. This was rolling along until the ending and that’s a problem around WWE far too often. The ending was a mess as we set up Boogeyman vs. Finlay over the Leprechaun, which is one of those things that doesn’t make a ton of sense and I’m almost scared to hear the explanation. The match itself was good, but just assume a time limit draw and stop watching.

Post match the Leprechaun escapes from Boogeyman and refuses to go back under the ring. The Boogeyman scares him though and Finlay throws him back under.

Vickie Guerrero, now sans neck brace, isn’t sure what is next for her around here. What she does know is that the working conditions around here are unsafe. She isn’t sure what is next for her but there is an opportunity that interests her.

Deuce And Domino vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick

Non-title with Cherry and Ashley here as well. Kendrick rolls Deuce up to start and it’s off to London for a front facelock. London and Kendrick start working on the arm but a Domino distraction lets Deuce get in a cheap shot. Domino comes in to hammer away, setting up a hard knee to the face for two. The armbar goes on with an elbow in London’s face, followed by some forearms to the back. Deuce hits a dropkick but London kicks his way out, allowing the hot tag off to Kendrick. Everything breaks down and the running knee to the face puts Kendrick away.

Rating: C. The more I see from these guys the more I like them, and then having them beat London and Kendrick is an even bigger deal. I could go for pushing a fresh team after London and Kendrick have dominated the division for the better part of a year. This was the least bad idea from a storyline perspective, as it isn’t like there is another team for Deuce and Domino to beat at the moment.

Batista comes in to see Teddy Long and wants to know what Undertaker is doing at Wrestlemania. He’ll find out by the end of the night.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell are in the ring, with a local government official presenting Booker with the key to the city. Booker has a speech ready, which includes him saying he is better than the other celebrities from Houston, including Walter Cronkite and Roger Clemens. Did Cronkite ever beat Big Show and John Cena on the same night??? Booker keeps going, with Sharmell’s facials agreeing facials are making it even better.

The government officials kiss Booker’s ring (doesn’t seem to be their taste) but Booker needs to go talk to ZZ Top’s Billy Gibbons. Booker wants him to kiss the royal feet, which isn’t happening. Instead, here is Kane to clear things out, including beating up the officials, because lawsuits do not exist in wrestling. That’s actually a fresh match for a change and I could go for it.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Vito

Vito slaps away to start but gets knocked into the corner and stomped down. The dress is ripped off and Kennedy beats Vito, in his regular trunks, into the corner. The Green Bay Plunge finishes Vito in a hurry.

Post match Kennedy grabs the dress to choke Vito.

JBL gets to host a bikini contest between Ashley, Jillian Hall and Krystal. Ashley and Krystal disrobe but Jillian reveals a short shirt and shorts instead. Rather that wearing a swimsuit, she sings Oops I Did It Again instead. Ashley wins and Jillian gets stripped.

Maryse welcomes us back from a bathtub.

Here’s the same Undertaker video that opened the show.

Mr. Kennedy complains to Teddy Long that he had Batista beaten at the Royal Rumble. Long doesn’t like it but gives Kennedy what he wants: a rematch next week.

Miz vs. Matt Hardy

Matt works on the arm to start and a hiptoss has Miz frustrated. A headlock doesn’t last long on Miz as he drop toeholds Hardy to the floor. Miz sends him into various things, including back into the ring for some left hands. Hardy fights up again and hits a middle rope elbow to the back of the neck. The Side Effect gets two but Joey Mercury sneaks in for a cheap shot with his mask, setting up the Mizard of Oz to give Miz the pin.

Rating: D+. So yeah, the story gets to continue because these guys have to keep fighting. They’ve had a few matches now and while the story with the nose makes sense, I’m not sure if it has the legs to make something like this go much longer. Miz getting the win is a good thing as it isn’t like Matt needs to beat him.

Here is Batista, who wants an answer from Undertaker. Batista has heard all about the Streak and how Undertaker can’t be beaten at Wrestlemania. He welcomes the challenge though….and here is John Cena to interrupt. Cena says he isn’t here for a fight because he has had a weird week. He won the Tag Team Titles on Monday (doesn’t have the belt) but then almost got superkicked by Shawn Michaels.

It’s Wrestlemania season and everyone wants to go after the title and then when it can’t get worse, BONG. Cena was on the wrong end of the coldest stare that he has ever seen and now he needs to know what is coming at Wrestlemania. The gong strikes and thirty seven hours later, Undertaker is in the ring. Undertaker stares at Cena, then he stares at Batista….and here is Shawn Michaels (without the Tag Team Title either).

Shawn says Undertaker won the Rumble but what did that prove? They’re the same kind of person and they both thrive on competition. Shawn is challenging him for a match with the Wrestlemania title match on the line. Undertaker doesn’t say anything because here is Vince McMahon to interrupt. Vince doesn’t care what Shawn or the fans want because they’ll want what Vince wants, when he tells them they want it. We’re not getting Shawn vs. Undertaker, but we can have Cena/Michaels vs. Batista/Undertaker. No decision is made on Wrestlemania, but they’re making it pretty clear.

Overall Rating: C. Much like ECW, the important thing here is that the show felt big. This felt like a show on the Road To Wrestlemania and a lot of that was due to the star power. At the same time though, a lot of the positives came from things actually happening. This show felt important and that is not the kind of feeling you get very often around here. It wasn’t a great show, but it felt like the start of something important and that’s good enough.

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Smackdown
Date: January 26, 2007
Location: Mobile Civic Center, Mobile, Alabama
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the final show before the Royal Rumble and I’m really not sure what they are going to be able to do to fill in two hours this week. Last time felt like a show that didn’t need to exist and I have a bad feeling that we are going to be seeing even more than that this time. Hopefully we get a little something good in there but there is only so much Deuce and Domino can do. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look at how Mr. Kennedy became #1 contender and then fighting Undertaker in a rematch. Kennedy attacked World Heavyweight Champion Batista on commentary, drawing him in for the DQ in a very smart move.

Opening sequence.

Batista vs. Gregory Helms

Non-title. Batista starts fast by driving Helms into the corner and boots him out to the floor. Some choking ensues on the outside but Helms goes to the eyes to escape. Back in and Batista shoves him out of the corner but a few shots to the head put Batista down. The eye is still messed up as Helms drops a leg. Some right hands to the eye set up three straight near falls but Batista is back up with the spinebuster. The spear into the Batista Bomb finishes Helms.

Rating: D+. This was much more frustrating than bad, as there was no reason for Helms to lose here. With all of the talented wrestlers WWE has, there was NO ONE ELSE to take this loss other than the heavily damaged Cruiserweight Champion? There wasn’t a second option for this one? This has been done far too long now and it is beyond old at this point. If nothing else, it makes JBL sound stupid for praising him over and over with Helms losing so often.

Miz vs. Chris Benoit

Non-title and we see some clips of Benoit winning the 2004 Royal Rumble. Benoit takes him into the corner to start and Miz hits the hide button. With that broken up, Benoit hits a running elbow for two and kicks away in the corner. A headbutt into a backbreaker gets two but Miz is back with a neckbreaker. The neck crank goes on to slow Benoit down and a slam gives Miz two. We’re right back to the neck crank but Benoit drives him into the corner for the chops. Benoit isn’t having this and headbutts away, setting up the Swan Dive for two as Miz gets a foot on the rope. The Crossface is good for the tap a few seconds later.

Rating: D+. Well at least the champ didn’t lose. It wasn’t much of a match though as Benoit beat Miz up, took a few shots and then won with his signature stuff. Granted that’s about exactly what should happen here as there is no reason whatsoever for Miz to be a threat to Benoit. I’ll take that over another champion losing at least.

Deuce and Domino and Cherry make sure their car is ready. These three are gems, with Deuce being rather annoyed at the possibility that the backstage guy is looking at Cherry.

Maryse, with champagne, welcomes us back from a commercial in French.

Deuce And Domino vs. Adam Evans/John Robinson

Cherry is here too and takes her sweet time taking off the guys’ jackets. Robinson and Deuce start things off and it’s a shot to the mouth to put Robinson down. Domino comes in to talk a bunch of trash as Cole talks about being bullied in high school. It’s off to Evans, who gets kneed in the head and sent outside. Deuce isn’t pleased with Evans being near Cherry so it’s back inside to Domino to keep up the beating. The assisted running boot to the face knocks Evans silly for the pin.

Rating: C-. Again, probably the most entertaining people on the show at the moment. They got to have another complete squash here and it worked out fine, with the focus being on just getting the idea over instead of doing anything important. The division needs someone new and this worked well for what it was supposed to be.

MVP tells Teddy Long that his match with Kane tonight is unsafe and the burns on his back are all Long’s fault. Long: “First of all, I want you to quit breathing on me.” If MVP doesn’t wrestle tonight, he isn’t in the Rumble on Sunday. MVP seems to change his mind.

King Booker vs. Finlay

The Leprechaun pokes his head out during the entrances and Queen Sharmell joins commentary. Booker seems to get in an accidental poke to Finlay’s eye to start so we pause for a bit just a few seconds after the bell. With the eye seemingly ok, Booker takes him down by the arm and starts hitting Finlay in the face. Finlay comes back with his own thumb to the eye and some shots to the throat to put Booker down. There’s the jumping seated senton for two, setting up the chinlock.

Back up and Booker hits his hook kick to the face for two. Finlay isn’t having that and takes him down by the leg to crank away. Some cannonballs onto the leg keep Booker in trouble so Finlay wraps it around the rope. The leglock goes on and you can get the feeling that Finlay likes to hurt people like this. Booker fights up with right hands and a kick to the face to drop Finlay, setting up an elbow drop. They ram heads in the corner though….and the Leprechaun goes after Sharmell. The Leprechaun tries to drag her underneath the ring but Booker makes the save. The brawl is on in the aisle and that’s a double countout/DQ.

Rating: C. There is something about the way Finlay beats people up that makes it so much fun. He just looks mean and it is fun to watch him pull on a limb. I can also go for the idea of not having Finlay lose, as Booker is on a downward trend since he lost the title. Let Finlay get a bit of a boost instead of bringing Finlay down to boost Booker up again for a week or two.

Paul London/Brian Kendrick/Ashley vs. MNM

London takes Nitro down to start as I love how frequently the Brand Extension rules are just forgotten. Nitro can’t do much with London other than sending him to the apron, where Melina breaks up a springboard to put London in trouble. Mercury comes in to take over on London but it’s right back to Nitro for a faceplant.

London can’t quite fight out of the chinlock but he can flip out of a double suplex and bring in Kendrick to pick the pace way up. Kendrick clears the ring but Melina breaks up a dive. That’s fine with Ashley, who spears her down (with a heck of a spear), leaving Kendrick to dropkick Mercury for two. In the melee, the Snapshot is enough to finish Kendrick.

Rating: C. I like both teams so this worked out well. It would be nice to have MNM want to go after the titles not, but I can’t believe that is actually going to happen. This was a fine use of a few minutes though, with talented wrestlers getting the chance to showcase themselves a bit. Commentary even stopped talking about Ashley’s Playboy for a bit to take the match seriously!

Here’s Mr. Kennedy, but first we see the opening video again. Kennedy talks about beating the Undertaker again last week and now it is time to beat Batista again to become World Champion. Kennedy brags about how great he is and how no one can stop him but here is Batista to interrupt. Batista offers him a chance for another slap….and then the gong goes off. Undertaker appears in the ring but his big boot hits Batista by mistake. Undertaker doesn’t seem to mind though, which certainly fits for him.

Maryse tells us to keep watching.

Vladimir Kozlov is in negotiations with all three brands. He would win the Royal Rumble if he had the chance to compete though. Also, he loves WWE.

Kristal comes in to see Teddy Long and hits on him. Long thinks she looks good and she leaves, with Vickie Guerrero replacing her. Vickie needs to talk to him about something but he must be busy with Kristal. Long isn’t sure what to do.

Video of Kane eliminating eleven people from the 2001 Royal Rumble.

Kane vs. MVP

MVP tries to circle him but Kane gets in a shot to the back to cut him down. Some shots to the bad back have MVP in a lot of agony and Kane elbows him in the corner. There’s a knee to the back complete with leg cranking to make things even worse. Kane rips the gear open to get at the bad back a bit more and MVP needs a breather on the floor. Back in and MVP gets in a shot to the face to choke away on the ropes.

Right hands on the mat keep Kane in some trouble and a bit shot puts Kane on the floor. That’s fine with Kane, who hits an uppercut but gets sent into the steps. Back in and Kane unloads in the corner, setting up the side slam to bang up the injuries even more. There’s the top rope clothesline to put MVP on the apron, setting up a dropkick to his back. With nothing else working, MVP grabs a chair for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Mainly a squash here but that isn’t the biggest surprise. The problem is we have established that Kane can dominate MVP and I’m not sure how many more times we need to see it. They did keep it a little bit shorter here though and that is a good idea given what they have done so far.

Post match MVP chairs him down again and grabs a can of gasoline. Kane sits up and kicks him in the face to take it away though, sending MVP running.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Battle Royal

Kane, MVP, Chris Benoit, Miz, King Booker, Finlay

Kane goes straight for MVP for the whole attempted burning alive thing. The brawling continues around the ring with Booker down near the ropes. The Leprechaun slips Finlay the shillelagh to hit Kane in the back and that’s good for the first elimination. Benoit and Booker brawl to the floor without being eliminated, leaving MVP and Miz to not be able to get rid of Finlay.

Everyone gets back in so Miz hits MVP in the back to slow him down. We get some teases of people going through the middle rope before MVP wises up and tries to put Finlay over the top. MVP kicks Finlay out tot he apron as we hear about Shawn Michaels winning the WWF Title at the 1997 Royal Rumble. Finlay backdrops Miz out….and there’s the gong again. Undertaker appears and starts wrecking people….and keeps doing it for several minutes as this kind of keeps going. I’m assuming the match was thrown out somewhere in there.

Rating: D. This was a bunch of sitting around waiting until Undertaker got here and that made for a pretty big waste of time. I’m not sure what they were going for with this, but they could have cut off a few minutes to make it that much better. It just seems like they were out of time and it was a bunch of filler until the end….which went on for a long time too.

A bunch of finishers from Undertaker allow him to stand tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. They had an idea for the show but it really wasn’t working throughout. The big deal was setting up the Royal Rumble and that was fine, as long as you have something that is a little bit more interesting. The show wasn’t very good, but the Royal Rumble is on Sunday and none of this matters as soon as that show starts. Not a good show, and that really doesn’t make a difference.

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Smackdown
Date: January 19, 2007
Location: Alltel Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re less than two weeks away from the Royal Rumble and that means it is time to put the finishing touches on the card. This year’s show has taken things in a slightly different direction by just having the majority of the field announced without much in the way of talking about it on screen. Other than that, Batista is getting ready to defend against Mr. Kennedy. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Mr. Kennedy for a chat after becoming #1 contender last week. There were sixteen men trying to beat the clock but Kennedy was the only person who could pull it off. He beat Chris Benoit in five minutes and Miz of all people lasted that long against the Undertaker. People accuse him of cheating but who wouldn’t have done what he did?

After beating six World Champions, it is time for him to win the title, but here is Teddy Long to interrupt. Long congratulates Kennedy for his win last week, but tonight is a little different. Tonight, Kennedy is going one on one with the Undertaker, and if Undertaker wins, we’ll make the Royal Rumble a triple threat match.

Maryse welcomes us back.

We look at Matt Hardy accidentally blowing up Joey Mercury’s face at Armageddon, followed by Mercury jumping Hardy for some revenge.

Matt Hardy vs. Joey Mercury

Mercury starts fast with a cheap shot so Hardy goes for the bad face, sending Mercury running into the corner. Hardy is patient enough to hit a clothesline but it’s too early for the Side Effect (you never go with the signature that soon). They head outside with Mercury sending him into the steps to take over, followed by some choking in the corner. A snapmare sets up a chinlock but Hardy is right back out with a jawbreaker. Now the Side Effect connects and the middle rope elbow to the head connects. The Twist of Fate is countered into a tiger driver which is countered into a rollup to give Hardy the fast pin.

Rating: C. These two worked well together and there is a personal story to give them a reason to fight. This is a good example of taking something that happened and letting them fight each other because it makes sense. That is the kind of thing you don’t see enough of these days and it worked just fine here.

Post match here’s Johnny Nitro to jump Hardy, setting up a Snapshot on exposed concrete. That’s what you call escalating quickly.

Post break, here’s exactly what we saw before the break.

Miz is bragging to Layla and Ashley about what he did to Undertaker and knows he could have won with more time. Kane pops up and running ensues.

Kristal tries asks Vickie Guerrero about the feud between Chavo Guerrero and Chris Benoit but Vickie wants to talk alone in the locker room. Ok then.

Video on Chavo Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit.

MVP/Dave Taylor/William Regal vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick/Vito

This could be different. Ashley is here with the latter and MVP is still taped up. It’s a big brawl to start until we settle down to London monkey flipping Regal. Vito comes in but gets kicked in the ribs, allowing MVP to come in and send him into the buckle. Back up and Vito is fine enough to hit a slam onto the banged up back but Taylor comes in to hammer away.

Regal and MVP take turns on Vito until he manages a rollup for two on Regal. Choking puts Vito back down in the corner as JBL refers to Vito as “her”. MVP has to cut off a hot tag attempt but a jawbreaker allows the hot tag off to Kendrick to clean house. Everything breaks down and London dives onto Taylor. Kendrick loads up Sliced Bread on Regal but MVP catches him in an Emerald Flosion for the pin.

Rating: C+. This is the kind of match I can go for most of the time: take some people and put them into a combination you don’t see too often, as it will give you something fresh for a change. You don’t get to see MVP vs. London or Kendrick very often so mixing it up a bit can do some good. Nice little match too, with talented people doing their thing.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero

Benoit is defending and this is No DQ. Chavo starts smart by kicking Benoit low and snapping off a Saito suplex. With Benoit down, Guerrero unhooks the top and middle buckle pad but gets dropped onto the top rope for taking too long. Benoit tries the Crossface but Chavo rolls outside, only to get Crossfaced out there anyway. That’s broken up and Chavo’s chair shot hits the post.

Back in and the Crossface goes on again with Chavo having to roll out again. Another chair shot is cut off by a backdrop but Chavo whips him chest first into the exposed buckle for two. Now the chair shots can connect, including Chavo driving the chair into Benoit’s neck. A flying armbar onto the open chair gets two but Benoit is right back up to send him outside.

Benoit hits a dropkick through the ropes and sends Chavo hard into the barricade. Chavo staggers over to the timekeeper and nails Benoit with the belt though and it’s time for Three Amigos, including suplexes onto the belt and the chair. The frog splash only hits chair though and Benoit gets two. Now it’s Benoit suplexing Chavo onto the belt but he misses the Swan Dive, banging up his shoulder again in the process. Chavo grabs the chair but gets pulled into the Sharpshooter for the tap to retain the title.

Rating: B-. The matches have been pretty good but it is time to wrap this one up. Chavo has now lost to Benoit several times now and Benoit needs a fresh challenger. They did something with the stipulation here so it did make sense in the situation. Hopefully we get to see something new for both of them now, as their rather nice feud should be over.

Batista is excited for the main event and is going to be ringside.

Mr. Kennedy complains about the main event so Jillian Hall suggests that she go talk to Long.

Deuce And Domino vs. ???/???

So now we get a new team in the form of Deuce And Domino, a pair of greasers who come out in an old car with a woman named Cherry, who blows bubblegum and wears roller skates. You know, for all of those people in 2007 who were nostalgic for the 1970s version of the 50s.

Before the match, the team introduces themselves, thankfully not talking like Fonzie to match the looks. Domino mentions that Cherry is his sister and Cole mentions that she is dating Deuce. The other team gets jumped before the bell with Deuce kicking away. A running kick to the seated head finishes for Deuce in a hurry. Total squash but it’s kind of hard to get your head around the gimmick, which I think I like.

Mr. Kennedy yells at Teddy Long, who just recaps the idea of the main event. I’m assuming they just needed to fill in a minute with anything here.

Maryse welcomes us back.

Kane vs. Miz

Kane unloads with shots to the face to start but the big boot misses. That doesn’t really matter as Kane is right back with a backbreaker, followed by some knees to the back in the corner. The logical bearhug goes on but Miz fights his way out and goes up, only to dive into a boot to the face. The chokeslam is good for the easy pin.

Rating: C-. Total squash and that’s all it needed to be. There is no reason to believe that Miz is going to be a threat to Kane and it isn’t going to hut him to take a loss here. They didn’t do anything beyond what they should have done here and it was an effective use of about four minutes. Kane can move on to the Rumble and Miz can annoy someone else, as he should.

King Booker interrupts Krystal talking to Teddy Long. He isn’t happy about not getting a title shot but he’ll win the Royal Rumble and get it back at Wrestlemania. Long is fine with that, and puts Booker in a six man Over The Top challenge next week.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker

Batista is on commentary and if Undertaker wins, the Royal Rumble match is a triple threat. Undertaker suplexes his way out of a headlock to start and sends Kennedy head first into the buckle. Old School connects early and Undertaker is annoyed by a kickout. Kennedy avoids a charge and hammers away but gets sent outside. A bit of pummeling ensues and we take a break.

Back with Undertaker hitting a headbutt but Kennedy fights his way out of a superplex attempt. Undertaker sits up though and it’s time to stalk Kennedy on the floor. Back in again and Kennedy gets smart by dropkicking the knee. Kennedy cranks on the leg but Undertaker uses the good leg to kick his way to freedom. They head outside again with Undertaker being sent knees first into the steps.

The knees are fine enough to send Kennedy back first into the post and there’s the apron legdrop for two. The Last Ride is broken up and Kennedy goes right back to the knee. Undertaker’s knee is fine enough to hit Snake Eyes into the big boot to knock Kennedy outside, where he shoves Batista. Back in and the chokeslam is loaded up….but Batista charges in to spear Kennedy for the DQ because Kennedy is smart.

Rating: C. The match was just kind of there but the ending was really smart with Kennedy understanding that he can’t beat Undertaker on his own but he can avoid him being in the title match. That’s the kind of thinking you don’t see often enough and it worked really well here. Good, smart ending as we’re not ready for Undertaker vs. Batista just yet.

Undertaker glares down at Batista to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Given that the show had very little to do with changing up the Royal Rumble, this was still pretty good with the smart ending and Deuce And Domino debuting. Other than that, we had a show that was mainly a placeholder as we move towards the pay per view. Enough stuff happened here and that is often enough to make a show work out.

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Smackdown
Date: January 12, 2007
Location: Peoria Civic Center, Peoria, Illinois
Attendance: 2,600
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

This is a bit of a weird show as it is part two of the Beat The Clock Challenge. Last week we had a bunch of people trying to set the fastest time with the winner getting to challenge Batista for the Smackdown World Title at the Royal Rumble. Tonight we have even more people trying to do the same so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Mr. Kennedy likes his chances with a time of 5:07. That’s a pretty long time actually.

Beat The Clock: Finlay vs. Matt Hardy

The clock is set at 5:07. They start brawling on the floor with Finlay getting the better of things and taking it back inside for one. Hardy grabs a rollup for two and hits the running corner clothesline into the bulldog for the same. Finlay’s backslide gives him two of his own but they collide for a double knockdown. It’s Hardy back up first with a pair of Side Effects for two each but Finlay breaks up the third. Instead Hardy takes him down and goes up, only to be distracted by the Leprechaun. Finlay uses said distraction to hit him in the knee with the shillelagh. An Indian Deathlock goes on but time expires at 5:07.

Rating: C. They were beating on each other rather well here and it felt like they were both trying to win the match. That’s how the match should go and it made sense, though there is only so much quality you can get in such little time. On top of that, it doesn’t make Finlay look great when he can’t win a match in five minutes with interference and a weapon shot.

Post match here is Joey Mercury to blast Hardy with a chair over and over like a bit of a mad man.

Post break, Mercury says he is going to go after Hardy until their faces look alike. That’s quite the threat.

Tatanka vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Rematch from last week’s surprisingly good match. Yang hammers away at the bell to send Tatanka outside for a breather. Back in and Yang jumps him again but this time it’s a whip into the corner so Tatanka can pound him down for a change. A few kicks to the back set up a chinlock to keep Yang in trouble, followed by a suplex for two. Tatanka hits a shoulder in the corner and grabs another chinlock but Yang jawbreaks his way to freedom. Some kicks to the face stagger Tatanka and it’s a crossbody into a neckbreaker for two. A spinwheel kick lets Yang go up but Tatanka pulls him down into the End of the Trail for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not as good as last week but at least Tatanka got a pin. Granted this was his last match in WWE so it isn’t like it matters that much. Tatanka asked to be released the following week and was let go, which makes a bit of sense. There wasn’t much of a role for him, but he wasn’t a total disaster or anything close to it. Just not the right time for him, so this was probably the best idea.

Maryse, in the shower, welcomes us back to the show.

Clips of the four team ladder match from December, with Joey Mercury’s nose exploding.

Chris Benoit vs. Mr. Kennedy

Non-title rematch from last week where Kennedy won. Benoit wastes no time in taking Kennedy around the ring to start and sending him into the buckle. A backdrop sets up a snap suplex for two on Kennedy but an elbow to the face cuts him down. Benoit is right back with the German suplex to send Kennedy outside, but Benoit throws him back inside. That earns him a toss to the floor with a pull of the trunks, setting up a few slams on the floor.

Back in and Kennedy drops an elbow for two but Benoit snaps off the northern lights suplex for two of his own. The rolling German suplexes connect but here is Chavo Guerrero for a distraction as we take a break. Back with Chavo on commentary and Benoit having to go to the ropes to get out of an armbar. That means a suplex over the top to put both of them on the floor for the big crash. They get back in with Kennedy whipping him into the corner for two, setting up the abdominal stretch.

The referee does his job for once and catches Kennedy grabbing the rope so Kennedy drops Benoit ribs first onto the top rope for two. Back in and Benoit manages to send him into the corner for a breather. Benoit heads up top but gets superplexed right back down for another near fall. Kennedy picks him up but Benoit snaps him down into the Crossface attempt, sending Kennedy bailing out to the floor.

Back in and Kennedy has to punch his way out of the Sharpshooter attempt, followed by a backbreaker to put Benoit down for a change. Another Crossface attempt is broken up in a hurry so Benoit rolls the German suplexes for two instead. The Swan Dive connects for a delayed two but Kennedy flapjacks him onto the top rope. There’s the Regal Roll and Kennedy goes up top, where he has to shove Benoit back down.

A missile dropkick gives Kennedy two but the Kenton Bomb misses. That means Benoit can hit five straight German suplexes and the Sharpshooter goes on this time. Cue Chavo for a distraction so Benoit tries the Sharpshooter on him as well, only to have Kennedy roll Benoit up with the tights for the pin.

Rating: B. This was a heck of a match despite the fairly eye roll inducing ending. Benoit vs. Chavo is done already and I’m not sure why they are keeping it going. Kennedy continues his rise to the top and it would not surprise me to see him hold on after how they have set him up here. Good match too, and one of the better ones in recent memory on Smackdown.

Post match Benoit beats up Chavo, who bails to the floor.

We see another part of the career history of Batista, including his comeback to become World Champion again. As usual, WWE is really good at this stuff.

Tag Team Titles: William Regal/Dave Taylor vs. Brian Kendrick/Paul London

London and Kendrick, with Ashley, are defending. Joined in progress after a break with Taylor headlock takeovering Kendrick to grind away a bit. A monkey flip into a dropkick gets Kendrick out of trouble and it’s off to London as we start plugging Ashley’s Playboy. Regal comes in and gets double suplexed, followed by a top rope double stomp to Regal’s back.

Cole actually gets in a smart question by asking how the APA would have dealt with London and Kendrick. See how easy that can be? Taylor comes back in to slam London down and a suplex gets two. We hit the chinlock for a bit, followed by a tag back to Taylor for a chinlock of his own. Make that another chinlock from Regal and then a quickly broken dragon sleeper from Taylor.

London charges at Regal and manages to drive him into the corner for the hot tag off to Kendrick. The pace is picked up and a middle rope crossbody hits Regal but he rolls through for two. London and Taylor go outside, leaving Kendrick to backslide Regal and retain. Regal’s scream of anger makes it that much better.

Rating: C+. Good match here, as you kind of knew would be the case. Regal and Taylor are fine challengers for the pretty awesome champs, though the problem is becoming obvious: there is no one to give London and Kendrick a real challenge, which is making things a little less interesting. Maybe a new team can come in, but for now, it is fun to watch these guys hang onto the titles in entertaining matches.

Remember when Kane burned MVP in the Inferno match?

Beat The Clock: MVP vs. Vito

The clock is set at 5:07 and MVP is taped up after the Inferno match. MVP rakes the eyes to take over to start and stomps away to put Vito down. Vito pulls him down to the mat for two as Kennedy watches anxiously in the back. A kick to the back gets two on Vito as JBL is freaking out over Vito’s dress.

Back up and Vito hits a slam into a Vader Bomb for two, followed by some rollups for two each. Vito goes for the arm but MVP kicks him down again. A running boot in the corner gets two on Vito and there’s a faceplant for the same. Vito sweeps the legs into a jackknife rollup for two but time expires at 5:07.

Rating: C-. This went by fast but it never really felt like they were going for the win as hard as they could. What matters is keeping the overall story moving while also building something up with each match. This showed you just how banged up MVP’s ribs really are, which could give us something new in the whole Teddy Long Is A Horrible Boss deal. It was an energetic enough match, though the Vito deal is totally over already.

Post match MVP kicks him to the floor but gets dropped on his ribs for good measure.

Raw Rebound.

Next week: Chavo Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit for the US Title in a No DQ match.

Batista is ready for anyone and he won’t sleep on Mr. Kennedy. Facing Undertaker would be cool though.

Beat The Clock: Miz vs. Undertaker

The clock is set at 5:07 and JBL is VERY happy when Miz is announced as the opponent. Miz dodges around to start but gets thrown into the corner to start the right hands. Old School gets two and the chokeslam is loaded up with 3:00 left. Cue Mr. Kennedy for a distraction so Undertaker drops him, allowing Miz to score with some dropkicks.

Undertaker knocks Miz outside and there’s the apron legdrop. Snake Eyes sets up the big boot but the referee gets bumped. Undertaker has to deal with Kennedy but comes back in for a chokeslam. Kennedy pulls Miz to the floor so Undertaker throws him back in for the Tombstone and the cover as time expires at 5:07.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t the point here, as this was about Kennedy being an annoyance to keep Undertaker from beating Miz. There is something to be said about Kennedy managing to hang in there long enough to win in the end, as it is not the kind of thing you would have expected to happen. Kennedy is fine in the Royal Rumble title shot too, so this worked out well for a story, though not so much for a match.

Kennedy is happy to win end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Just like last week, this was mainly about one idea and that worked well enough. What mattered here was setting up the Royal Rumble title match and Kennedy is a good choice for the shot. The rest of the show set up a few more things, but the Rumble itself continues to be a thing that happens to be happening. The match does not need a lot of build, but a little build might help things out.

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Smackdown
Date: January 5, 2007
Location: Lakeland Center, Lakeland, Florida
Attendance: 4,800
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

It’s the first Smackdown of the new year and we are just a few weeks away from the Royal Rumble. That means we need to get some things ready and in this case that includes a theme show, as Teddy Long has announced the Beat The Clock Sprint. In other words, we are getting a Beat The Clock Challenge to determine Batista’s challenger for the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Here are the most recent results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Teddy Long to get things going. As has already been announced, Long explains the Beat The Clock Challenge. There will be sixteen wrestlers in eight random matches, with whoever wins in the fastest time getting the World Title shot against Batista at the Royal Rumble. This brings out Batista (to quite the eruption) to say he likes the idea of being in the ring against the best. With that out of the way, it’s time to get things going.

Beat The Clock: Kane vs. Chavo Guerrero

Chavo looks a good bit nervous to start and an early rollup attempt goes rather badly. Kane powers him out to the floor where Chavo isn’t sure what to do. Back in and a slam into a jumping legdrop gives Kane two, followed by another trip to the floor. Chavo gets in some stomps on the way back in and sends Kane into the steps for his first breather. Back in and Chavo hits a dropkick between the shoulders, setting up a headscissor choke to keep Kane in trouble.

That’s broken up in a hurry but Kane’s suplex is countered into a DDT. That just makes Kane sit up and the real beating is on. A running clothesline in the corner sets up a side slam but the chokeslam is broken up. Instead Kane backdrops him down and puts Chavo on top. That is broken up as well though and Chavo hits the frog splash….with Kane catching him by the throat for the chokeslam and the pin at 7:53.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure how much drama there was here but it is nice to have some kind of stakes on the match. That time isn’t going to last for more than a match or two but at least they had something simple and to the point here. Kane beating up Chavo worked, even though Chavo’s offense wasn’t exactly the most convincing.

Maryse, in limited clothing, welcomes us back to the show.

Beat The Clock: Paul London vs. Brian Kendrick

The clock is set at 7:53 and what a coincidence. They trade quick rollups to start and Kendrick grabs a headlock. This gives JBL a chance to talk about drinking with Faarooq as Batista is watching in the back. London’s headlock is countered into a headscissors and Kendrick grabs a headlock takeover of his own. They trade some more near falls until London tries to force Kenrdrick’s arms down for a cover. London’s double underhook doesn’t work either as Kendrick backdrops him for two.

You can hear the BORING chants as they get up for a standoff. Kendrick tries an O’Connor roll but gets sent outside for….nothing actually. Back in and they hit stereo crossbodies for a double knockdown. Another exchange of rollups goes nowhere as Kendrick falls out to the floor. Back in and Kendrick grabs a headlock with less than a minute to go. That doesn’t last long so they try some rollups for two each as time expires.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one and there were times where they came off as rather dumb. Why would you grab a headlock in a timed match with less than a minute to go? On top of that, JBL wasn’t even screaming at them for being stupid. This was going off the style of they know each other so well and are mirror images of each other, which might make for a nice idea but it rarely works well in practice.

Post match Ashley comes out to make sure everything is cool, allowing JBL to plug her Playboy appearance. Again.

JBL is in the ring for a chat, as he continues to rant about Teddy Long ruining Smackdown. We see another clip of the Inferno match with MVP’s back being burned, plus some photos of MVP’s burned back. Cue MVP to thank JBL for speaking for him, as he was busy being in the hospital and all that jazz. Then he heard about the Beat The Clock Challenge and knew he had to come back and get his shot at the title. That’s why he’ll be here next week in case Long is willing to put him in the competition. This wasn’t exactly a heel promo as it’s kind of hard to take issue with MVP being mad about being SET ON FIRE.

Beat The Clock: King Booker vs. Gregory Helms

Non-title, Queen Sharmell handles Booker’s introduction and the clock is set at 7:53. Booker wastes no time (because he’s smart) by clotheslining him into the ropes as, again, Batista looks on. Helms escapes a suplex and hammers away but Booker grabs a spinebuster for two.

Booker hits a superkick and strikes away in the corner but Helms is back with some forearms. Helms wraps the leg around the rope and hammers away in the corner until he is dropped throat first across the top. Another kick to the face gives Booker two but Helms gets fast and hits a quick middle rope dropkick. A high crossbody/forearm gives Helms two more and he dodges the ax kick for a bonus. Sharmell offers a distraction though and it’s the side kick into the ax kick to give Booker the win at 6:24.

Rating: C. This was a weird one but both guys felt like they were trying to win as fast as they could here. It is nice to see people being smart in a match like this for a change as that has not quite been the case so far. Again though, can we PLEASE get rid of the Cruiserweight Title already? It is very clear that WWE does not care about it so drop the thing before it makes Helms look even worse.

Post match Booker and Sharmell leave so here is the Boogeyman to plant Helms again. Boogeyman worms him to make it worse.

We gt a pretty long video on Batista, looking over his entire career from the Deacon days to Evolution to the injury to the return to get the title back. This was pretty good.

Ashley vs. Jillian Hall

During the entrances, Jillian talks about wanting to destroy Ashley’s pretty face. Jillian takes her down to start and rips at the face a bit. A running knee hits Ashley in the face but she gets a boot up in the corner. Ashley headscissors her out of the corner but walks into a powerbomb for two. Not that it matters as Ashley grabs a quick small package for the pin.

Maryse welcomes us back to the show again.

Beat The Clock: Tatanka vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

The clock is set at 6:24 and JBL is all over the cowboy vs. Indian story. Tatanka jumps him to start but walks into a rollup and a neckbreaker for two each. A sleeper doesn’t work very well on Tatanka as he powers out and gorilla presses Yang outside for a crash. Back in and it’s something like a pumphandle slam into a suplex into a backbreaker for two each on Yang.

A few kicks get Yang out of trouble though, including a middle rope missile dropkick for two. The comeback is so strong that Yang’s chaps fall apart. Yang goes up but gets suplexed back down as the time is starting to wrap up. A slam gets two on Yang but he is right back up with the moonsault press as time expires.

Rating: C. I wouldn’t have bet on this working but they had a pretty nice match here. Tatanka isn’t exactly lighting the world on fire but he can wrestle a good enough power style. Yang is quick enough to hang in there with most opponents and they pulled out a pretty shocking match here. Not great, but what kind of expectations would there have been coming in?

Post match, Tatanka beats Yang down again.

Vickie Guerrero talks about how Chris Benoit caused the problems between herself and Chavo Guerrero. Everyone has turned their backs on her and now she has nothing. Crying ensues.

We recap the Challenge matches so far.

Here is Mr. Kennedy to talk about how he is sports entertainment. I think he means he’s going to win.

Beat The Clock: Mr. Kennedy vs. Chris Benoit

Non-title and the clock is set at 6:24. They grapple into the corner to start with Kennedy actually getting the better of things. A whip into the corner puts Benoit down for two as we see Batista watching in the back. There’s another whip into the corner for two more as this is one sided so far. Benoit grabs a quick rollup for two but the Sharpshooter is countered into Kennedy’s own near fall.

The Kenton Bomb hits raised knees and it’s time to roll the German suplexes. The Swanton misses though and Kennedy takes a turnbuckle pad off. Benoit snaps on the Crossface, with Kennedy going straight into the rope. Back up and Benoit is sent into the exposed buckle to give Kennedy the pin at 5:07.

Rating: C. This was kind of a weird match as Kennedy dominated for the most part with Benoit barely getting in any offense. I did like the recurring idea of Benoit being whipped into the corner before the big one at the end finished him off so they did have a theme to the match. This worked out well enough and Kennedy is a good potential challenger for Batista.

Post match Kennedy brags about the win but here is Teddy Long to remind us that the second half of the challenge is next week. Next week we will have MVP, Finlay, Matt Hardy and the Undertaker trying their luck, which does not sit well with Kennedy. Kennedy: “KENNEDY!”.

Commentary recaps the remaining challengers to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I love a show where there is a theme throughout the night and that was absolutely the case here. They had a good show with almost everyone working on the same angle. It was a smart idea to have something like this as the year starts, as it isn’t like the title match is going to mean given that it is at the Royal Rumble. Simple and to the point here, which might not be exciting, but it is rather safe and that is not a bad thing from time to time.

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Armageddon 2006
Date: December 17, 2006
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Attendance: 8,200
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re wrapping up the pay per view year with a Smackdown offering and it isn’t looking like the most important show. The card features a triple main event, including a Last Ride match, an Inferno match and a tag match with John Cena coming over from Raw as a guest star. I’m not sure if that is going to be enough but they certainly have some star power. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the triple main event, which is nearly half of the card.

Kane vs. MVP

Inferno match, meaning the ring is surrounded by fire and you set your opponent on fire to win. After his intro, we get a video on MVP coming to Smackdown and getting on Kane’s bad side, setting up this match. MVP tries to bail but gets stopped by the flames, meaning it is time for Kane to start hammering away in the corner. A backdrop makes the flames pop up and there’s a forearm to the back of the head, which does nothing to the flames because it isn’t a big crash.

Kane’s superplex is broken up and MVP hits a high crossbody as they continue to use moves they don’t use in regular matches. MVP hits a running boot in the corner but Kane is back with a big boot of his own. The chokeslam connects and Kane rips a turnbuckle pad off…but it puts the flames out when he tries to light it on fire for no apparent reason. Instead Kane hits a side slam and sends MVP outside, setting up the top rope clothesline. Kane avoids being sent into the fire and chokes MVP into it for the win.

Rating: D. I’m not sure how much better this could have been as it is the kind of match that does not leave you with many options. They are stuck in the ring and the whole match is designed to tease the fire spot. Throw in the fact that so many of the moves and spots are designed to make the flames go up rather than anything they would usually do. They were trying, but you can only do so much.

Post match, MVP gets extinguished as JBL freaks out a lot.

Teddy Long is having a Christmas party for the Divas and has a present for them: a Naughty or Nice lingerie contest. Good thing they bring that stuff with them I guess.

JBL is still incensed over MVP as we kill off some time for the fire equipment to be removed.

Tag Team Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Dave Taylor/William Regal

London and Kendrick are defending….but hold on as here is Teddy Long, who is still in the Christmas spirit. Let’s make this a little more fun.

Tag Team Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Dave Taylor/William Regal

London and Kendrick are defending and this is now a ladder match. Hold on again though as Long isn’t done.

Tag Team Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Dave Taylor/William Regal vs. MNM vs. Hardys

London and Kendrick are defending and this is now a ladder match. I’m not sure what authority Long has over Raw stars appearing in teams that don’t exist anymore but oh well. JBL: “There is nobody better in ladder matches than the Hardys.” This is true as they won….no that was Edge and Christian. Uh….no that one was too. I’m sure they were the best like once or twice or so!

Anyway, it’s a brawl to start until we get the Hardys vs. London/Kendrick showdown, much to the fans’ delight. The Spin Cycle plants Kendrick but the villains come back in to clean house. MNM and the Hardys get in a fight over who gets to bring in the ladders with the Hardys throwing them inside, though managing to avoid the Brits. Poetry In Motion hits Taylor and MNM gives him a Snapshot to make it worse.

Matt whips Kendrick into a ladder (ow) but London dropkicks Jeff off of another ladder. Mercury climbs up so a bunch of people pick up the ladder and drop it, including Mercury, onto the ropes, sending Mercury onto Nitro on the floor. Another Poetry In Motion misses in the corner and only hits the ladder to knock Jeff silly again. London’s climb is cut off in a hurry and Kendrick is pulled down after getting just slightly higher. Matt gets dropped onto a bridged ladder for a top rope double stomp from Kendrick but gets up to stop Jeff from being superplexed onto some ladders.

Instead Jeff turns the ladder into a seesaw, which smashes Mercury’s nose halfway out of the arena, leaving him gushing blood and in no shape to continue. The replay shows Mercury’s head snapping back in a rather scary looking visual. Regal and Taylor get back up to start taking over and suplex London into a ladder in the corner. Matt gets up for a save and neckbreakers Taylor as Jeff brings in another ladder (and you can see the blood pooled up on the floor).

Nitro knocks the ladder out from under Jeff on the floor for another crash and then drops another down onto Regal inside. This time it’s Kendrick making the save so London springboards in with a dropkick to cut Nitro off. London catches Matt on top and hammers away until Matt backdrops him down for another huge crash.

Now it’s Nitro and Jeff’s turn, with Jeff busting out a huge sunset bomb. Matt climbs a pair of ladders but the Brits pull him down in a hurry. A running knee to the head drops Matt and Regal goes up, only to have Kendrick bring him down for a huge crash. London goes up top, punches Matt down, and pulls down the titles to retain.

Rating: A-. It deserves a bit of an upgrade just because of how bad Mercury’s face looked. This was all about one big spot after another and that worked out very well, as you kind of knew these teams would be able to do. Taylor and Regal felt out of their element but you need someone there to offer a change of style. London and Kendrick continue to look unstoppable and the idea of them against the Hardys is rather dream matchish at this point.

Kristal tries out her lingerie and JBL doesn’t seem to remember MVP’s troubles.

Miz vs. Boogeyman

JBL: “You had an inferno match, you had a ladder match and now you have this unfettered jackass.” Miz brags about beating Boogeyman tonight and JBL rants over him, as only Miz can make JBL this incensed. Boogeyman gyrates around to start and knocks Miz outside as JBL tries to figure out why Miz’s hair is cut that way. Cole thinks Miz winning here would be a huge upset. JBL: “Miz being in the ring would be a huge upset. He’s in the ring and I’m upset.” Boogeyman hits a backdrop but Miz hits a quick shot to the face. Miz goes up top, only to dive into a chokebomb (which takes a second to get right) for the pin.

Post match, Miz gets wormed.

Chavo Guerrero dedicates his US Title match to Vickie Guerrero, who thanks him for being a real man.

We recap Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero, with Chavo accusing Benoit of being a woman beater due to accidentally running into Vickie at Survivor Series.

US Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit

Chavo is defending and has Vickie Guerrero with him. Chavo jumps him to start but Benoit chops away and forearms him in the face. Some right hands keep Chavo down and Benoit throws him outside to keep up the beating. Back in and the rolling German suplexes have Chavo rocked but it’s way too early for the Swan Dive.

Instead Chavo catches him on top for the superplex for two before starting in on the back. The reverse chinlock goes on so Benoit fights up, earning himself another knee to the back to keep him in trouble. Benoit’s Crossface attempt is broken up and Chavo gets to pose a bit. Chavo ties him in the Tree of Woe but a baseball slide only hits post. He’s fine enough to rake the eyes, hit the Eddie dance, and try Three Amigos.

That takes too long as well though as Benoit rolls eight straight German suplexes for a standing ovation. The threat of the Sharpshooter draws in Vickie with the title so Benoit tries it on her, only to get rolled up by Chavo for two. You don’t do that to Benoit, who reverses into the Sharpshooter to retain.

Rating: C+. These two work well together, though I’m not sure how much drama there was in the idea of Chavo winning the title. He has been well built and the story seemed to call for the change, but that is a bit too far to imagine Chavo actually going. Benoit winning is fine too, as he could put over a bigger, or at least more promising, name down the line.

Cruiserweight Title: Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Gregory Helms

Helms is defending. They go technical to start and that means an early standoff. Yang takes him down and goes up but has to bail out of a moonsault attempt. A quick suplex sets up an even more quickly broken chickenwing as Helms sends him outside. Some forearms to the back set up a neck snap across the top, followed by some choking. Yang manages a backdrop to the floor and a dive drops Helms again.

Back in and Helms kicks him down, setting up the chinlock to draw the BORING chants. JBL even acknowledges it and yells at the fans for not getting it (fair enough as it’s not that bad). Yang makes the comeback and hits a spinwheel kick in the corner for his own two. Helms catches him on top and hits a super neckbreaker as the chants continue. A dropkick knocks Helms out of the air and Yang goes up, only to miss a corkscrew moonsault. Helms grabs a yet to be named Codebreaker to retain.

Rating: C+. Pretty good here and the boring chants were fairly ridiculous. The problem is there is no reason to care about the title and WWE has made it even worse. At the end of the day, the title means nothing and the fact that Helms barely ever defends the thing makes it worse. Just saying that Helms has held the title forever isn’t going to make fans care about it. Having matches like this over and over could, but I have no reason to believer that is the case.

We recap Undertaker vs. Mr. Kennedy in the Last Ride match, which feels like the real main event of the show. Kennedy has attacked Undertaker a few times and even busted him open with a microphone. After Kennedy and MVP accidentally conspired to beat Undertaker in a First Blood match at Survivor Series, it is time to end Kennedy once and for all.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker

Last Ride match, meaning a casket match but with a hearse that has to be driven out of the arena. The hearse is wheeled into the arena and Kennedy gets to promise to beat Undertaker again. Kennedy dodges around to start and the referee bails outside (Why was he in there in the first place?). Undertaker gets sick of the movement and grabs Kennedy by the neck, meaning the beating is on in a hurry.

There’s a toss over the announcers’ table and then another into the apron but Kennedy manages to get in a shot of his own. Kennedy’s dive off the apron is pulled out of the air, with Undertaker tossing him around again. They fight up to the hearse, with Undertaker being driven into the closed door. It’s way too early to get him inside and close the door though, with Undertaker kicking his way out. Kennedy gets dropped onto the steps and they head back inside with Undertaker nailing a superplex.

They’re already back outside with Kennedy getting smart by jumping onto Undertaker’s back for the choking. The unconscious Undertaker is sent inside but comes out the front door to escape and hammer away. Back in and Kennedy grabs a chair to knock Undertaker silly a few times, earning himself some quick situps. Kennedy bails and the chase is on as they head up the set. Undertaker is then thrown off said set, which is quite the crash that lands on a big pad.

We cut to some fans chanting for Kennedy as he puts the unconscious Undertaker inside for the second time. Kennedy gets in the driver’s seat and Undertaker sits up in the back (obvious but it worked). Undertaker pulls him out and hits a chair to the back. Another one to the head busts Kennedy open and there’s a chokeslam onto the roof. The Tombstone onto the roof knocks Kennedy silly and Undertaker puts him inside for the win.

Rating: B. It was violent and pretty definitive, though Undertaker winning the big blowoff in the end didn’t do Kennedy the biggest favors. What matters here though is that Kennedy got to look at least somewhat even in this big of a match against Undertaker. I’m not sure if it lived up to the brutality that JBL promised, but it was the best thing on the show so far and felt like a main event.

Finlay and King Booker promise to not double cross each other. Bickering begins to ensue but Queen Sharmell comes in to say cool it because they need each other. Finlay says he has the Leprechaun and all Booker has is Sharmell. Booker and Sharmell are incensed.

Here’s Santa Claus, sending JBL into a bit about wanting to buy the North Pole and cook the reindeer. Santa says it is cold at the North Pole so it’s time to heat things up here. Therefore, it’s time for the Diva lingerie contest. We have Kristal, Layla, Jillian Hall and Ashley. They all take their time modeling/dancing and the fans are a little more pleased with Layla and Ashley. Everyone winds up winning and Santa disrobes as Big Dick Johnson. Dancing ensues.

We recap Batista/John Cena vs. Finlay/King Booker. Batista has been dealing with both of them and gets to pick any partner he wants for the match. Guest starring ensued.

Batista/John Cena vs. Finlay/King Booker

Batista has a banged up arm coming in and Queen Sharmell is here with the villains. Cena and Booker get things going with a lockup until Booker drives him into the corner. Some knees to the ribs don’t do much good as Cena armdrags him into an armbar. Batista and Finlay come in with Batista grinding away on a headlock. Finlay gets up a knee in the corner but dives into Batista’s arms.

That means something like a MuscleBuster of all things with Booker breaking up the cover and coming in off the tag. A clothesline gets two on Booker and it’s back to Cena with a bulldog. Finlay has to break up the STFU and the distraction lets Sharmell slip Booker the scepter. A shot to Cena’s throat gives Booker two and a quick cheap shot from the Leprechaun has Cena in even more trouble.

Cena slips away from Booker and grabs a DDT though and they’re both down. The hot tag brings in Batista to clean house and a Boss Man Slam drops Booker. Everything breaks down and Finlay chairs Batista in the leg. The chair is kicked back into Finlay and the leg is fine enough for a spinebuster on Booker. The Batista Bomb is enough for the pin.

Rating: C-. I believe the words ho-hum would apply here, as this felt like little more than a house show main event. Seeing Cena and Batista together is cool, but it isn’t like this came off as anything close to feeling like a pay per view main event. It wasn’t a bad match as they kept this short and to the point, but it still wasn’t exactly something that felt like it belonged in this spot save for the star power.

Posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. Maybe it was the lower expectations but I had a good time with this one. The opener is the only thing that was particularly bad, and if you ignore the fact that this show means absolutely nothing and was only there because something had to be, you should have some fun with the thing. The ladder match is excellent and the Last Ride match is quite good as well. Good show here, even if it isn’t going to mean a thing in the long term.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: December 15, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden Arena, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for Armageddon and that isn’t exactly giving me hope for this week. The big story this week is Undertaker and Kane vs. MVP/Mr. Kennedy as the two long running feuds merge into one for a change. The rest of the show might not be all that great, but that has never stopped Smackdown before. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Raw’s John Cena to get things going. Cena knows that the question on everyone’s mind is where is Parts Unknown, but they also might be wondering why he is here on Smackdown. He does know that, and it’s because of three reasons. First of all, he lives here, which is why his father is ringside. After a hug to his dad, Cena says there was no way he was going to miss a show here.

It’s Christmas time though and WWE runs a Secret Santa game with its employees. This time around, Cena got Michael Cole, and managed to get him everything he wanted: a salami, a shirtless picture of David Hasselhoff, and a bag of salty nuts. With that gag out of the way, Cena talks about Armageddon (which is his favorite Def Leppard song) and how important the tag team match is going to be.

Cue King Booker and Finlay, who promise to give Cena the same beating they gave to Batista last week. Cena is ready to fight but here is a taped up Batista for the save. Cue Teddy Long to make it a singles match playa, with Cena vs. Finlay set for later, which thankfully means we don’t have another Booker vs. Batista match.

William Regal/Dave Taylor/Gregory Helms vs. Brian Kendrick/Paul London/Jimmy Want Yang

Take two title feuds, throw them into one match. London and Helms start things off with London cranking on an armbar. Kendrick comes in for a front facelock but Regal gets in a cheap shot from behind to take over. Taylor adds a suplex as commentary talks Ashley being more than friendly with London and Kendrick.

It’s off to Regal for some knees and a chinlock, followed by the suplex into the corner. An uppercut knocks Kendrick down again and Helms comes back in for a front facelock. A missed charge lets Kendrick kick Taylor in the head though and the hot tag brings in Yang to clean house. Regal and Taylor have had enough and walk out, leaving Yang to hit a moonsault press for the pin on Helms.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have the time to do much with so many people involved but they did a basic story well enough. Kendrick takes a good beating and it was smart to let Yang get the pin over Helms to suggest even the possibility of a title change. Of course that is pretty much guaranteed to not happen, but it’s a nice way to go here.

Clip from the Armageddon press conference, the high point of many a journalist’s resume.

Matt Hardy vs. Joey Mercury

No seconds here, which is kind of weird to see. Commentary immediately ignores the match to talk about Tribute to the Troops on Christmas night as Mercury takes Hardy into the corner to start. That is broken up in a hurry but Mercury hammers away against the ropes, being a bit more aggressive than usual here. Mercury knocks him down and grabs a chinlock, followed by a neckbreaker for no cover. A knockoff screaming elbow gets two on Hardy, who fights up at the idea of gimmick infringement. Hardy hits a clothesline of his own into the real screaming middle rope elbow and the Twist of Fate finishes Mercury.

Rating: C. I’m not sure how to process the idea of a clean match like this one but it worked out fine. Hardy is the bigger name here and it isn’t like anyone cares about Mercury as a singles wrestler in the first place. That being said, since there isn’t a match set for either of the teams or their individual members, this was a bit of a strange use of Smackdown time.

Video on the history of the Inferno match.

MVP tells his agent to get him out of the Inferno match but here is Mr. Kennedy to interrupt. The argument is on, with the two of them explaining the idea of their matches on Sunday.

MVP/Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker/Kane

MVP gets scared by the fire during his own entrance, which I’m not sure I remember being there before. Kennedy slowly opens the door of the hearse in the aisle and finds nothing, which doesn’t mean much around here. Joined in progress with Kane stomping Kennedy into the corner and then lifting him into the air for the choking. A rake to the eyes allows for the tag off to MVP, who is side slammed down in a hurry. The top rope clothesline makes it even worse and Undertaker comes in to unload in the corner.

Kennedy finally does something worthwhile by offering a distraction to break up Old School and Undertaker gets stomped down for a change. Undertaker is right back with right hands to MVP in the corner though and now Old School connects. Kane tags himself in and the brothers hit some big boots. The double chokeslam plants Kennedy but MVP saves him from the Tombstone. Undertaker stalks MVP to the back as Kennedy and Kane fight on the floor for the double countout.

Rating: C-. This was the teaser trailer for Sunday and that’s all it needed to be. We’ve seen these four fight in various combinations for weeks now and there isn’t much left to do than have the big blowoff matches at the pay per view. I’m glad they didn’t waste time on a long match before the ending either, so while this might not have been very good, it was at least efficient.

Post match Kennedy sends Kane into the steps and gets in the hearse. Kennedy revs the engine but the lights go out, allowing Undertaker to appear in the driver’s seat. That sends Kennedy and MVP running….right into Kane as he sits up for a pretty funny moment. The villains run off in a hurry.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Funaki

Vickie Guerrero is here with Chavo and Funaki gets the jobber’s entrance, likely because he is a jobber. Before the match, Chavo calls out Chris Benoit to apologize for hurting Vickie. Benoit comes out (looking odd in a suit) and says he isn’t apologizing for anything so Chavo beats on Funaki to vent some frustration. A pair of belly to back suplexes have Funaki in trouble and, after shrugging off a few kicks, Chavo plants him with the brainbuster. The frog splash finishes Funaki in a hurry.

Post match Benoit comes in and puts Chavo in the Sharpshooter. Vickie comes in and gets in Benoit’s face, causing him to get up and Vickie to curl up into a screaming ball without being touched.

Video on Tribute to the Troops, set to a Creed song.

Vito vs. Sylvan

Merry freaking Christmas. Cole talks about Vito trying to force himself on him and I think we might need to hear more about that. Vito hammers away to start but gets backdropped to the apron and clotheslined out to the floor. JBL’s jokes continue to abound as Vito makes the comeback, pulls up the dress (thankfully revealing trunks instead of the thong), and drops a leg for two. Vito walks into a Samoan drop but pops up for an O’Connor roll to finish Sylvan.

Rating: D. This was back to the old stuff for Vito, which wasn’t funny in the first place and wasn’t exactly good here either. It is pretty clear that the hype he had is gone, but at least they kept it short. JBL’s jokes and the whole idea have not exactly aged well, but it isn’t like Vito is being treated as a big deal in the first place.

Armageddon rundown.

Here are the Miz and Kristal to prove that Miz is not afraid of Boogeyman. Tonight, he is going to eat some scary foods to show just how fearless he really is. First up, Miz eats some pig’s tongue, followed by monkey brains….but he can’t eat the worms on plate three. Then Boogeyman pops up through the plate to scare them off.

Finlay vs. John Cena

Non-title. Finlay grabs a quick headlock and then runs Cena over with a shoulder. That’s enough to start Cena back up and he runs Finlay down, followed by an elbow. Finlay is right back with a clothesline into a nerve hold, followed by a rip to the face. Cena fights up with a belly to belly for two, only to have Finlay run him over again and send Cena face first into the apron.

As commentary talks about Vince McMahon being the first Irish champion, the Leprechaun pops out and is promptly thrown at JBL. Finlay decks Cena and puts the Leprechaun back underneath the ring as we take a break. Back with Finlay hitting another running clothesline and sitting on Cena’s chest for two. Finlay’s armbar keeps Cena down for a bit and he pulls Cena down into the Fujiwara version to make it even worse.

Back up and Cena wins a strike out but Finlay rakes the eyes to escape the FU. Cena doesn’t seem to mind and hits the ProtoBomb into the Shuffle but Finlay goes back to the bad arm. The Celtic Cross gets two so here’s the Leprechaun again, allowing Finlay to grab a chair. Cena kicks that back into his face though and it’s the FU for the pin.

Rating: B-. Finlay continues his series of good jobs as the upper midcard brawler that bigger stars have a bit of trouble beating. That is a fine spot to be in as Finlay is tough enough to make the matches work without feeling like a threat to jump up to the next level. Good main event here, and it’s rather nice to see the hometown boy get to have a big win for a change. And they even tossed around a leprechaun!

Post match here’s Booker to double team Cena but Batista makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Your taste may vary here as they did a nice enough job building up the pay per view, but the pay per view isn’t that interesting in the first place. It is very clear that the show is going to be built around the two gimmick matches with the main event tag match being thrown in to have a main event level match. This show wasn’t too bad, but it isn’t something you need to see, much like Sunday’s show.

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Smackdown
Date: December 8, 2006
Location: Florence Civic Center, Florence, South Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re on the way to Armageddon and the big story is that Raw World Champion John Cena will be joining forces with Smackdown World Champion Batista to face King Booker vs. Finlay. That could make for a big house show match, though they are going to need something a little bigger to make the card work. Would an Inferno match and a Last Ride match be enough? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Mr. Kennedy to get things going, though he is a little shaken up by the hearse entrance. Kennedy says that Undertaker is not going to get inside his head by having a hearse in the arena. That isn’t going to take his mind off the Last Ride match because he already beat Undertaker at No Mercy and at Survivor Series. He is already inside Undertaker’s head and now he is going to beat Undertaker at Survivor Series. The gong strikes and the hearse starts moving backwards despite no one driving. Undertaker pops out from the back and chases Kennedy off in a hurry.

Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. William Regal/Dave Taylor

Non-title and Ashley is here with London/Kendrick. Speaking of London and Kendrick, they dropkick the villains off the apron before the bell to start fast. Everyone gets inside so Kendrick can crank on Regal’s arm and London adds a jumping elbow to the jaw. Taylor comes in and gets kicked down by Kendrick as commentary starts talking about Ashley in Playboy.

Regal takes London down and drops a knee on the head but the chinlock doesn’t last long. Instead he snaps off a half nelson suplex for two and Dave comes in for the full version, though minus the suplex. It’s already back to Regal for the chinlock but London fights up and dropkicks his way to freedom. Taylor isn’t about to allow a hot tag though and dives onto London for the save.

Regal comes back in and headlocks London in front of Kendrick, because Regal is great at tormenting people. That takes a bit too long though and London backdrops his way to freedom. The hot tag brings in Kendrick to clean house but Regal goes outside to stalk Regal. London breaks that up and gets a hug, but Regal trips Kendrick down, allowing Taylor to hit the bridging butterfly suplex for the pin.

Rating: C. These guys worked rather well together and it should set up a heck of a title match when they get there. The London/Ashley stuff feels a bit like the Hardys and Lita, which is not the worst place to go, and it isn’t like London and Kendrick have much else to do as champions in the first place. Now just do the rematch and see where it goes from there.

John Cena is ready for Armageddon because he doesn’t like King Booker or Finlay either.

Batista says we’ll never see something like this again and is ready for Finlay tonight.

King Booker wants his title shot but Finlay tells him to wait in line. Booker wants to make sure they are on the same page, but Finlay says Booker talks too much.

Batista vs. Finlay

Non-title. Batista backs him into the corner and smirks a lot on the break. Some right hands and a knee to the face in the corner have Finlay in more trouble and the BATISTA chants start up again. Finlay gets tired of getting hit in the face so he takes Batista down and cranks on a chinlock. That’s broken up in a hurry and Batista hits a clothesline, followed by pulling Finlay away from the ropes for a crash. Finlay gets dropped onto and kicked over the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Batista hitting an elbow to the face but getting sent face first into the middle turnbuckle. There’s a rake to the eyes to keep Batista down but he manages to get in a quick shot to the face of his own. A Jackhammer plants Finlay for two and it’s time to work on a hammerlock.

Batista boots him in the face to send us to the floor again, though this time Finlay sends him shoulder first into the post. Back in and Finlay works on the arm with an armbar and then sends it into the buckle. A Fujiwara armbar goes on but Batista powers up into a Samoan drop. Cue the Leprechaun, who is tossed onto Finlay. Now cue King Booker, who is tossed onto the floor but Finlay comes back with the shillelagh for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was pretty good while it lasted and the pretty long match time flew by. Batista is getting better at the power game and Finlay can do something like this with anyone. They beat each other up well enough and in this case, the run in made sense as Finlay and Booker are going to need as much momentum as they can to keep the match from looking like the one sided main event that it will be.

Post match the beatdown is on with the villains focusing on Batista’s arm.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Jamie Noble

The winner gets a Cruiserweight Title shot against Gregory Helms, on commentary, at Armageddon. Noble starts fast and hammers away at Yang, including a suplex for two. We’re already on the chinlock as Helms does not seem thrilled with the fact that Yang is “half Asian, half stupid.” Yang comes back with a middle rope kick to the face but runs into a powerslam for two. They slug it out until Yang gets in a hard shot to the face, setting up a moonsault press for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C-. No time here and the win lets Yang have the chance to challenge for the least valuable title in all of WWE. There is no reason to get excited about the title, though at least Helms is finally defending the thing. WWE has done a terrible job of making the title seem like it matters at all so maybe this can help get it back on its feet. Of course it won’t, but I’ll take it for one night.

Chris Benoit denies that he is a woman beater but Vickie Guerrero comes in to slap him. Chavo Guerrero helps her away.

MVP asks Teddy Long how many times he has to beat Kane. Now it’s an inferno match and that is not cool with him. He tries to talk to him, “brother to brother”, but Long says that MVP doesn’t have some kind of contract clause to get out of this but if he doesn’t get in the ring, he’s fired. MVP can call his agent or the Ghostbusters, because next week it’s MVP/Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker/Kane.

Sylvan vs. Chris Benoit

Non-title and Benoit chops away, rolls the German suplex, and wins with the Crossface in less than a minute.

Fans are looking forward to things on the See No Evil DVD. I’m expecting a movie to be one of them.

Miz vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

Cole and JBL bicker over Miz to start, with JBL seeming to get the better of things as Miz falls outside. Back in and Miz hits a slingshot shoulder for two, which has JBL more behind Scotty. A missed shot in the corner lets Scotty come back with the faceplant. The Worm takes too long though and Miz rolls him up with tights for the pin.

Post match Miz beats on Scotty even more and even tries his own Worm. That’s enough to bring out the suspended Boogeyman to lay Miz out and load up the worms….but Miz bails before he gets messy.

In the spirit of the holiday season, Kane roasts some chestnuts….in his bare hand.

Armageddon run down.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Kane

Before the match, Kennedy promises to beat Undertaker again. Kennedy jumps Kane before the bell but gets knocked down and elbow dropped. Kane hammers away in the corner, setting up a legdrop for two. More shots to the face send Kennedy outside so Kane heads outside to keep up the beating. Kennedy manages to get part of the barricade padding off but Kane hits him in the face again. They head outside again and this time Kennedy manages to dropkick him into the exposed barricade.

That’s good for an eight count so Kennedy plants him with a DDT for two more. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Kennedy sends him into the corner, only to have a running boot to the face countered with a grab of the throat. Some running clotheslines in the corner set up the side slam to plant Kennedy but he’s right back with the swinging neckbreaker. Kane pops back up and knocks Kennedy out of the air, setting up the top rope clothesline. The chokeslam is loaded up but MVP runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what else there was to expect here as much like Batista vs. Finlay earlier, the run in finish made the most sense. Kennedy continues to get to hang with a big name and he wasn’t completely beaten before the DQ. That’s about as good as this was going to be and it worked out fairly well as a main event.

Undertaker, gong, lights out, Kane and Kennedy disappear, fire scares MVP to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. They are doing everything they can to set up the pay per view but there is no way around the fact that the main event is little more than a guest star. The two gimmick matches can help the show a bit, but they are going to need more than that to make it work. I don’t think Benoit vs. Chavo (again) and Yang vs. Helms is going to do that, though I’m not sure what else they have to throw on there to make it much better.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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