Impact Wrestling – May 4, 2023: Here She Is

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 4, 2023
Location: Cicero Stadium, Cicero, Illinois
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

The road to under Siege continues and we should be in for a fun ride on the way there. With the main event already set up, there are still some spots that need to be filled in and some of those are likely to be covered this week. That should make for an interesting and important show so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

BREAKING NEWS: Trinity (formerly known as Naomi) has signed with Impact Wrestling and will be here with a live mic tonight.

Bhupinder Gujjar/Yuya Uemura vs. Brian Myers/Moose

Gujjar takes over on Myers to start and sends him into the corner. Uemura comes in to take Myers down and a knee drop gets two. It’s off to Moose, who gets knocked outside with Myers being sent into him. Gujjar and Uemura hit stereo dives to the floor to take them both down, followed by a middle rope bulldog to drop Moose back inside.

Moose powers him down and hands it back to Myers. The Roster Cut is countered into a belly to belly though and the double tag brings in Gujjar to plant Moose for two. The Gargoyle Spear misses but so does Moose’s spear. Gujjar hits a Sling Blade for two with Myers making the save. The spear gives Moose the pin on Gujjar at 6:47.

Rating: C+. Moose and Myers are actually turning into a nice heel team and I would not have bet on that being the case. Neither of them have much else to do so putting them together is a fine enough way to go. Gujjar continues to feel like a star in the making and Uemura is as solid of an up and coming hand as they have around here. Nice opener and better than I was expecting.

Steve Maclin/Champagne Singh/Shera are ready for whomever is dumb enough to team with PCO. Singh gives the interviewer money as she leaves (she seems surprised).

Dirty Dango is trying to figure out who attacked Santino Marella (he has a chart with strings attacking pictures, including who looks to be Tony Chimmel, Vladimir Kozlov and Tyler Breeze among several others). Dango summons Joe Hendry, who has a magnifying glass and asks about the hair Dango found at the crime scene last week. Worry not because Dango lost it (the 16 energy drinks in 36 hours might have caused the problem). Dango has a prim suspect though: Mike Tenay. Hendry thinks it might have been Trey Miguel, who doesn’t like Santino. A hug ensues.

Sami Callihan vs. Deaner

The rest of the Design is here with Deaner, who says Sami made a huge mistake by hitting him in the face with the baseball bat (which Sami has here). The fans think Deaner deserved it, which he says is giving Sami a false sense of hope. We’ll change things up instead.

Sami Callihan vs. Kon

The chokeslam plants Callihan and Angels stomps away behind the referee’s back until we get the opening bell. Sami quickly fights back and sends Kon the floor, where Kon trips him down to take back over. Kon runs him over and we take a break. Back with Kon dropping a knee for two and grabbing a bearhug. Callihan fights out and takes over but has to take out Angels. Deaner gets up on the apron with the baseball bat and gives Callihan the thumbs down, allowing the army of violence (the guys in yellow hoodies) to jump Callihan for the DQ at 10:21.

Rating: C-. Yeah I knew this feud wasn’t going to be over yet because I’m not that lucky. I still have no idea what is seen in either the Design of this feud in general but it has been going on for months now with no real end in sight. I’m sure Sami will have to go through all of them one by one before getting to face Deaner in what will be the most thrilling fight ever. Just get away from this stuff already and move on entirely.

Post match Deaner stares at Sami, who calls him a b****. The baseball bat to the face knocks Sami out.

Trey Miguel isn’t happy with being accused of attacking Santino Marella and thinks Dirty Dango had something to do with it. Joe Hendry wants to check Trey’s hair but finds nothing, leaving a confused Miguel to talk away.

Nick Aldis wants the World Title and he’s willing to work to get there. He doesn’t just get handed a title shot around here because the title is more valuable than that. Kenny King comes in to ask if Aldis is on the fast track or the easy train. Aldis thinks King is acting like a gatekeeper so Aldis will knock on that gate on his way to proving a point. King says he isn’t Scott D’Amore but seems interested.

Alisha Edwards vs. Jody Threat

Threat hits her in the face to start and hits some corner clotheslines. Threat misses a charge into the ropes but is right back with a German suplex. The F416 finishes Edwards at 2:56. That’s quite the defeat for someone who was being pushed a bit with Eddie Edwards.

The Motor City Machine Guns are excited that Chris Sabin will be getting an X-Division Title shot at Under Siege. They’ll always be a team but they can be successful on their own as well. Sabin is cool with getting a title shot at Under Siege (Sabin: “Which must be named after my second favorite Steven Segal movie.” Shelly: “What’s your first?” Sabin: “Under Siege II.” Shelley has to cover his face off that one.). With Sabin going after the X-Division Title, Shelly is going to go win the World Title.

We get the second part in the series of sitdown interviews with Frankie Kazarian, who talks about what he did when he left Impact in 2014. He went to Ring Of Honor and had to prove himself again, which was fine with him. Then he went to what would become AEW, but after having some success there as a team, it was time to prove himself back where he started, but on his own. He bet on himself and his future is here. These have been good and this worked too.

Steve Maclin/Champagne Singh/Shera vs. PCO/???/???

PCO is ready to go it alone but here are Heath and Rhino to say they’ll be the partners. Singh tags himself in to save Maclin from having to face PCO, earning a stomping in the corner. Rhino comes in and actually gets punched into the corner, only to chop his way to freedom. It’s off to Heath, who gets sent into the corner by Shera to take over.

Maclin comes in to stomp away but walks into a powerslam. That’s enough for a double tag to bring in PCO to beat up Singh, including a running flip dive through the ropes. Everything breaks down and Rhino Gores Maclin, leaving Heath to Wake Up Call Singh. The PCOsault finishes at 6:57.

Rating: C+. Nice match here and Singh played his role of designated loser rather well. Heath and Rhino are a good choice to put in here as the fans like them and they work well together as a team. Stringing out Maclin vs. PCO is a good idea, as Maclin can be scared of him until the title match and then escape with a win. This was a perfectly fine use of about ten minutes and that’s always nice to see.

The Coven is using magic on Deonna Purrazzo and Jordynne Grace.

The Death Dollz summon James Mitchell, who says the Coven isn’t powerful enough to block their access to the Undead Realm. He’ll fix it but won’t say what it costs. Rosemary, cleaver in hand, gives Jessicka an hourglass, saying they’ll be back before the sand runs out.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Mike Bailey

They shake hands to start but there seems to be some tension. Both catch the other’s kick before Gresham grabs a headscissors on the mat to take over. That’s broken up and they grapple against the ropes as we take a break. Back with Gresham kicking him in the face before snapping off an armdrag on what seems to be a banged up arm.

They go to a test of strength with Gresham getting him to the mat and cranking away on the hands. Bailey’s legs are fine enough to kick away but misses the big one to the head. Bailey goes for the arm as well before hitting the moonsault knees. The rapid fire kicks to the chest rock Gresham to send him outside, setting up the moonsault to the floor.

We take another break and come back again with Bailey kneeing him down for two. Gresham starts back in on the arm but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. They trade forearms until Bailey scores with the tornado kick. The Ultimate Weapon misses and Gresham slaps on the Octopus for the tap at 13:24.

Rating: B. Commentary kept hyping up how good these matches have been and yeah they’re not wrong. There is a chemistry that works here and it is amazing how much better a Bailey match can be when he doesn’t spend half of it not selling a leg injury. Gresham taking him down and getting him into the Octopus for the win worked, though I could go with not seeing these two together again for a bit.

Rich Swann comes up to Sami Callihan in the back, which doesn’t have Sami happy. Sami gets to the point: is Swann going to help him or not?

Steve Maclin complains to Scott D’Amore about Rhino, so he can defend the title against Rhino next week.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Here is Trinity (formerly Naomi, not the Trinity from the old TNA days) for a debut chat and the fans seem happy to see her. She’s glad to be back and is happy to be in Impact, where she can glow. The reason she chose Impact is the most storied women’s division in wrestling and she wants a piece of it. She’s hear to make an impact and wants the Knockouts Title.

Cue Deonna Purrazzo, who says Trinity invoked her. She knows what it is like to be in a new place, so if Trinity wants a title shot, it isn’t something she can just walk out on. Trinity says facing her will make Purrazzo wish she got fired. Cue Jordynne Grace to say everyone wants to see the two of them fight, but she has the next title shot. Grace and Purrazzo argue but Trinity says she’s waiting on the winner. Trinity leaves them to stare each other down to end the show.

It was a good way to debut, but they treated Trinity like this huge arrival and….she’s just not that big of a star. She’s certainly a name, but this isn’t Becky Lynch showing up. That is one of the good signs for the Knockouts division: it has the depth and history that this isn’t the single most important moment that has ever happened. It’s still a cool moment though, if nothing else because of how she left WWE.

Overall Rating: B-. Another solid show here as they did their thing and started boosting up Under Siege. I’m curious to see where a lot of these stories are going and that makes for a good sign, as things are interesting enough that I want to keep watching. Considering Under Siege is a lower level show, Impact seems to be on something of a roll and the Trinity debut should be a nice boost that will get some extra attention. Good show this week, which is a long running trend.

Results
Moose/Brian Myers b. Bhupinder Gujjar/Yuya Uemura – Spear to Gujjar
Sami Callihan b. Kon via DQ when the Army of Violence interfered
Jody Threat b. Alisha Edwards – F416
PCO/Heath/Rhino b. Steve Maclin/Champagne Singh/Shera – PCOsault to Singh
Jonathan Gresham b. Mike Bailey – Octopus

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 20, 2023: Dang This Stuff Works

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 20, 2023
Location: Rebel Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We are done with Rebellion and the biggest story is the new World Champion, having defeated Kushida to win the vacant title. At the same time, Deonna Purrazzo is once again Knockouts Champion, having defeated Jordynne Grace for the vacant title in the show’s main event. Let’s get to it.

Here is Rebellion if you need a recap.

We look at the new champions being crowned at Rebellion.

Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham/Trey Miguel vs. Time Machine

Gresham and Shelley go technical to start for a standoff so it’s off to Bailey vs. Sabin. An armbar has Bailey in trouble as commentary points out that everyone but Miguel lost at Rebellion. Kushida comes in and gets sent into the corner, where Miguel rakes his back. That doesn’t last long as Kushida gets over to his own corner, allowing all of Time Machine to crank on Miguel’s arm.

It’s off to Bailey, who gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a triple dropkick as the dominance continues. Shelley starts in on Bailey’s arm before it’s back to Kushida, who kicks Gresham and Miguel off the apron in a smart move. Everything breaks down and Sabin hits a suicide dive onto Gresham and Miguel as we take a break.

Back with Bailey’s arm still in trouble but he kicks his way to freedom. Gresham comes in and gets to face Kushida with Gresham getting a series of near falls. Sabin accidentally kicks Shelley in the chest though and it’s Miguel getting to clean house. Bailey busts out the slingshot springboard moonsault onto the pile on the floor but Kushida Hoverboard Locks Miguel. Time Machine all get submission holds on at once and we take another break.

Back again with Miguel knocking Kushida into the corner. That doesn’t last long as it’s back to Sabin, who gets to slug it out with Shelley. Bailey kicks him down and this the moonsault double knees to the chest. Sabin is back up with a German superplex and Shelley/Kushida break up the tag attempts. Bailey manages the Ultimate Weapon to a standing Sabin’s back as everything breaks down. The parade of strikes to the face leads to Kushida kicking Miguel in the face, setting up Cradle Shock for the pin at 26:35.

Rating: B. Like this wasn’t going to work. They had all six guys getting time and Bailey getting beaten up. What else could you want in a match? The ending even sets up Sabin (though Kushida and Shelley could be right there too) as Miguel’s next challenger, which boosts up the competition a good bit. Very solid opener here as they let six talented people have a long, long TV match and it worked.

Santino Marella is happy with his in-ring return but says he won’t be returning to the ring very often. Alisha Edwards interrupts to to yell about PCO but Santino sends her to the ring for her match. Gia Miller: “Did she have a match tonight?” Santino: “She does now.” Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in to ask about Swinger’s match but Santino says he can’t keep wasting resources on a loser. Dice has found the world’s greatest luchador though, and he’ll even pay for said luchador’s appearance and transportation. Even Santino is down with that.

Video on Deonna Purrazzo, the new Knockouts Champion.

Alisha Edwards vs. Tara Rysing

Alisha takes Tara into the corner to start and sends her flying without much effort. Tara manages a clothesline out of the corner but gets sent outside. Back in and an X Factor finishes Rysing at 2:27.

Post match Edwards stays on Tara but Jody Threat makes the save.

Post break Threat promises to take care of Edwards for Rysing.

Moose vs. Yuya Uemura

Brian Myers and Bhupinder Gujjar are here too. Moose takes him straight into the corner to start but gets pulled into an armbar. With Moose on the floor, Uemura loads up a dive but Myers takes the impact for him. That earns Uemura an apron bomb and Moose shoves him around back inside. Uemura fights up but Myers offers a distraction, allowing Moose to knock him back down.

Back in and Uemura hits a dropkick, followed by a middle rope bulldog for two. Moose suplexes his way out of a suplex but gets caught in a German suplex. Uemura’s high crossbody is broken up so Moose goes up, only to get belly to back superplexed down. Now the high crossbody can connect but Myers offers the distraction. Gujjar goes after him but Moose sends Umeura throat first into the top rope. The spear finishes Uemura at 9:57.

Rating: C+. Power vs. speed with interference mixed in worked well enough here and Uemura is feeling more and more like a player every week. He’s no longer just the guy on excursion but rather someone who might be something around here. Granted that isn’t going to have the longest future, but for now I can settle for a young, talented star giving Moose a nice match.

Nick Aldis is happy to be back and tells us some of his history around here. He’s coming for Steve Maclin and the World Title because he knows what it’s like to be under that pressure. As soon as Maclin’s strong legs start to wobble, Aldis will be right there to take the title from him. As usual, Aldis cuts a good promo, but he’s only so interesting.

Frankie Kazarian vs. Good Hands

Kazarian slugs away to start but gets caught in the wrong corner rather quickly. A dropkick puts both Hands down at once but Skyler low bridges Kazarian to the floor. Back in and Kazarian takes over without much trouble, setting up a Figure Four and small package for two at the same time. The slingshot cutter hits Hotch and the chickenwing finishes Skyler at 3:40.

Rating: C. Just a showcase for Kazarian here, which wasn’t the most thrilling stuff but it wasn’t supposed to be. Kazarian getting a push is a fine way to go as he would be a good choice for a one off World Title shot at Maclin. You aren’t likely to get anything worse than pretty good out of him so warming him up like this could be a rather smart move.

The Coven is coming for Deonna Purrazzo.

Sami Callihan talks about how smart he is and claims to have infiltrated the Design to take them down from within. Was that really supposed to be a surprise?

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Sheldon Jean

Hendry is defending and brings up Jean being on Big Brother Canada but having his season cut off by the Coronavirus pandemic. Jean shrugs off an early beatdown and hammers Hendry down on the mat for a bit of a surprise. That’s enough for Hendry, who fights up with some clotheslines. The fall away slam sets up…actually a strike off until Jean gets dropped. The Standing Ovation retains the title at 4:33.

Rating: C. This was a little longer than I expected and Jean got in a nice bit of offense so it might have been a tryout for him. Hendry got to break the smallest bit of a sweat to retain, but the real perk here was the energy that he brings. The motivational stuff is great and I could see Hendry going pretty far around here, as the fans are into him and that’s what matters a lot of the time.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

It’s time for new World Champion Steve Maclin’s Changing Of The Guard ceremony. Maclin walks to the ring under military guard and talks about having to learn who he was when he came back. Now he’s the World Champion and issues the open challenge to any Canadian. Cue Scott D’Amore to say he’s not happy with Maclin being the champion but he earned it. Why did Maclin take so long to go after Josh Alexander during his record title reign?

Maclin laughs him off because he was hoping the old D’Amore would show up. D’Amore says Maclin hit him like a coward and the jacket comes off. If Maclin wants to face a Canadian at Under Siege, he can face the perfect Canadian: Perfect Creation One, PCO! Cue PCO to beat up the guards, with Maclin bailing. Some guards are put through a table to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I’m running out of ways to say it but Impact continues to be a completely watchable wrestling show every week. You can follow the stories really easily and it isn’t hard to jump into a lot of this stuff. They were at a new starting point with a lot of the stories this week, but there is enough to have more going on next week. Good show here, with a rather nice opener and a surprise first challenger for Maclin makes it even better.

Results
Time Machine b. Trey Miguel/Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey – Cradle Shock to Miguel
Alisha Edwards b. Tara Rysing – Facebuster
Moose b. Yuya Uemura – Spear
Frankie Kazarian b. Good Hands – Chickenwing to Skyler
Joe Hendry b. Sheldon Jean – Standing Ovation

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 13, 2023: Worth Filing Out For

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 13, 2023
Location: St. Clair College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

The road to Rebellion end this week and that means it is time to finish off the build towards the show. In this case it means we are going to be seeing more build towards the new World Title match of Kushida vs. Steve Maclin. This week will also see what happens with Mickie James and the Knockouts Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Kenny King vs. Frankie Kazarian

The winner gets the advantage in the Hardcore War at Rebellion and the other teams are at ringside. They fight over a lockup to start until Kazarian snaps off some chops. King cuts him off though and starts hammering away in the corner to take over. A backbreaker gives King two and we hit the one armed camel clutch. Kazarian breaks it up and makes the clothesline comeback, capped off by a running forearm.

The springboard spinning legdrop gives Kazarian two but King is back with a tiger driver for the same. King sends him to the floor but Kazarian comes back in with a slingshot cutter for two. The brawl on the floor finally breaks out as Kazarian gets the chickenwing. Cue Brian Myers for a distraction, allowing Moose to spear Kazarian down for the pin at 8:18.

Rating: B-. These two were having a good match until the screwy ending, which was quite the twist as Myers and Moose haven’t had anything to do with this feud so far. They would be an upgrade over the Good Hands for the match but that might be asking too much. For now though, I’ll settle for talented wrestlers having a good match to open the show, as is the norm around here.

Post match the beatdown is on and Team Dreamer is left laying.

Earlier tonight, Steve Maclin interrupted the Canadian National Anthem. Kushida made the save and cleaned house in a brawl.

Lince Dorado vs. Black Taurus vs. Laredo Kid vs. Rich Swann

Crazzy Steve handles Taurus’ intro. Taurus sends everyone to the floor to start and hits the big dive, only to have a triple superkick send him to the floor. That means the dives can take him out and leave everyone down as we take a break. Back with Taurus launching Dorado onto the top, where he can superplex Kid (while on top of Taurus’ shoulders for a crazy visual).

Back up and Kid hits a springboard armdrag to Swann, followed by a double Golden Rewind from Dorado. Taurus is back in to clean house, including a heck of a pop up Samoan drop to Dorado. That’s not enough as Taurus powerbombs Kid onto Swann at ringside. Taurus cleans house and goes up, only to have Kid catch him with a super Spanish Fly for the pin at 10:44.

Rating: B-. This might not have broken the mold for a match like this but they did their thing well. Kid has felt like he should be the next breakout star in the division almost every time he is around but nothing has ever really clicked. It seems like they’re trying it again and pinning Taurus is certainly a good way to start. Taurus got to show off again here and that power is always worth a look. Fun match, as expected.

Long video on the Bullet Club vs. the Motor City Machine Guns in Ultimate X for the Tag Team Titles.

Jessicka and Rosemary want to go to the Undead Realm to get Taya Valkyrie back but Rosemary says she’s going alone because Jessicka doesn’t know how to do it. She opens the coffin….but it’s just a regular one instead of the portal. The Coven must be behind this!

Jessicka vs. Taylor Wilde

Rosemary and KiLynn King are here too. Hold on as Wilde gives Jessicka a tarot card to start so Jessicka shows it to Rosemary. That lets Wilde jump her from behind so Jessicka says STOP HITTING ME. Jessicka misses a charge and gets choked in the corner before a Backstabber brings Jessicka down again. Back up and some jabs stagger Wilde, setting up a running crossbody for two. Rosemary and King get into it, allowing Wilde to slip out of a Sick Driver and grab a fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin at 4:28.

Rating: C. The more I see of Wilde, the more amazed I am by the fact that she is the same woman who came back to almost no reaction last year. This is a completely different way to go for her and it is working rather well. The Coven has been a nice breath of air for the division and I could go for them holding the titles that much longer.

Jordynne Grace is ready for the Knockouts Title match at Rebellion but she can’t control what happens with Mickie James. She can control winning though.

Alisha Edwards is glad to have brought Eddie Edwards back to the right path. Now they want to get rid of the monster blocking his path.

Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry vs. Angels/Callihan

Before the match, Hendry confirms our belief in him. The rest of the Design is here too because what would it be like without the rest of them. Callihan suplexes Hendry for a fast two so Angels comes in, only to get suplexed as well. Dango comes in for the Dirtbag Shuffle but Angels takes him down. Callihan is whipped into Angels though and it’s back to Dango to clean house. Kon grabs the leg though and it’s a standing Sliced Bread to drop Hendry. A frog splash gets two, with Hendry making the save. Callihan hits Angels by mistake so Deaner stops to yell, leaving Hendry to hit the Standing Ovation for the pin at 4:39.

Rating: C. Egads I don’t know how much more I can take of this story. It feels like it has been going on forever and the Design somehow gets lamer every single week. Just get to someone turning on someone so they can have their big violent match and we can move on. Dango continues to do fine in his role and it’s nice to see him getting away from the dancing stuff. Hendry continues to be awesome and that’s all he needs to be.

Post match the Design jumps them again, until Santino Marella comes out for the save. This includes the Cobra because….oh my head hurts again.

Video on Steve Maclin vs. Kushida.

PCO promises to bury Eddie Edwards in a Last Rites match at Rebellion.

Bully Ray introduces Moose and Brian Myers as new members of his now seven person army. They’re ready for Rebellion and promise destruction because they’re family. Keep in mind that this is all to destroy TOMMY DREAMER.

Gisele Shaw vs. Tasha Steelz

Jai Vidal and Savannah Evans are here with Shaw. Steelz scares her to the floor to start before Steelz slaps her in the face back inside. That sends Shaw back to the floor and we take a break. Back with Shaw slapping her in the face as the theme continues. Steelz chops away but Shawn knocks her outside, where Evans hits a chokeslam onto the apron.

A snap suplex gives Shaw two more and we hit the reverse chinlock. With that broken up, Shaw hits a double jumping stomp in the corner and we take another break. Back again with Shaw hitting a running jumping uppercut for two more, followed by a swinging suplex for the same.

Steelz fights up and hits an ax handle into an atomic drop into a…completely missed jumping neckbreaker. Shaw’s belly to back toss sets up a running shot to the back of the head for two. The annoyed Shaw stomps away in the corner before they head outside for a slugout. Steelz sends her into the steps but misses a running knee, which only hits said steps. Back in and Steelz kicks the knee out for the pin at 21:23.

Rating: C+. Something tells me we didn’t miss much between those breaks as I have a hard time believing that these two had a pay per view main event length match out of nowhere. It wouldn’t surprise me if this had to be extended due to the Mickie James injury and if that is the case, they did rather well in an area they probably haven’t been in before.

Mickie James tells Santino Marella that the doctor has given her a diagnosis of her rib injury.

The fans leave the arena for Mickie’s announcement. I’m assuming this is to avoid the announcement getting out, but it comes off like some tragedy.

Rebellion rundown. Apparently Brian Myers and Moose are taking the Good Hands’ spots on Team Bully. At least they don’t have to find two more people for Team Dreamer.

Video on Mickie James’ Last Rodeo and path to winning the Knockouts Title again, plus Jordynne Grace and Deonna Purrazzo waiting for their shots.

Here is Mickie for her big announcement. When she started the Last Rodeo, she wanted to show that she still had it and that is what she did. At some point, every champion has to lose and she can handle some of that, but she can’t fight age. There is a difference between her and most of the division, but she feels like she is 20.

The fact that she isn’t makes this even worse and she thanks everyone for this Last Rodeo. She just got off the phone with the doctor though and she isn’t cleared to compete at Rebellion. She is a woman of her word and it is Deonna and Jordynne’s (watching in the back) time now. Mickie leaves the title, and her hat, in the ring and leaves. Grace leaves and Deonna looks on to end the show. This felt a lot like a retirement speech, but retiring over a broken bone feels like quite the stretch. James should be back and probably will, as ending a legendary career over something that will heal in a month or two is nuts.

Overall Rating: B-. The Mickie angle at the end was actually emotional and felt like a huge deal, which should set up the Knockouts Title match that much better. Other than that, the card for Rebellion was already mostly set coming into this show so there only so much that needed to be done. This show did well enough with the little that it had to cover, so nice job on hammering things down on the go home show.

Results
Kenny King b. Frankie Kazarian – Spear from Moose
Laredo Kid b. Black Taurus, Lince Dorado and Rich Swann – Super Spanish Fly to Taurus
Taylor Wilde b. Jessicka – Fisherman’s neckbreaker
Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry b. Callihan/Angels – Standing Ovation to Angels
Tasha Steelz b. Gisele Shaw – Kick to the knee

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – March 23, 2023: Leave The Memories Alone

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 23, 2023
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

It is the night before Sacrifice and we are eight days away from Multiverse United. That means it is time to build up both shows at the last minute, as there is still some work that needs to be done. The good thing is that both shows already have quite a bit set and now the final touches can be applied. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Steve Maclin vs. Josh Alexander, including Maclin costing Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian a six man tag last week.

Opening sequence.

The Design vs. Time Machine

Callihan is here with the Design. Kushida squares up to Kon to start but Sabin comes in as well, allowing Kon to clothesline both of them down. Deaner comes in and gets struck down by the Guns, only to take Sabin into the wrong corner. It’s off to Angels to trade chops with Sabin before a leg lariat puts Sabin down. Sabin ties Angels up though and Kushida/Shelley kick Angels’ arms out to take over.

There’s a running hesitation dropkick in the corner to hit Angels again and Shelley stays on the bad arm. Kushida snaps the arm across the top and it’s off to a double arm crank. Sabin comes back in but gets taken into the wrong corner so Angels can choke a bit. A sunset flip gets two on Deaner and Sabin dives over to Kushida for the tag. House is quickly cleaned and everything breaks down, with Kushida and Shelley taking over on Deaner’s arm for a change.

The handspring kick knocks Kon off the apron and Kushida hits a big dive to the floor to take out a variety of people. We take a break and come back with Angels (favoring his arm) and Kushida trading their forearms. Deaner kicks Kushida in the head and Kon’s spinebuster sets up Angel’s frog splash for two. A double clothesline Doomsday Device gets two on Kushida as Shelley makes the save.

Everything breaks down again and Angels is left alone, setting up a triple Dream Sequence. A triple kick in the head looks to set up Skull And Bones but Deaner makes the save. Hold on though as Callihan gets in to protect Deaner, leaving Callihan to get taken down as well. Angel’s dive is loaded up but he gets pulled into the Hoverboard Lock. Sabin kicks the arm away from the ropes and Angels taps at 18:50.

Rating: C+. Well that was….long. I’m not sure why anyone thinks there is a need for a Design match to go nearly twenty minutes but thankfully Time Machine was there to balance things out a bit. The action was fine but I can’t understand what is supposed to be interesting about the Design. It would be great to finally get to whatever they’re setting up with Callihan, because there has been almost nothing interesting so far and I have no reason to believe that is going to change.

The Coven is happy to be the new Knockouts Tag Team Champions and like magic.

Raj Singh and Shera are rich and like it in Las Vegas. The former is so rich that he’s now Champagne Singh as we just keep up the stereotypes.

Eddie Edwards is in the back with Kenny King and talks about how he has to get rid of PCO. That’s why he has brought in help, with King talking about how they realized they needed each other at Jay Briscoe’s mama’s house. PCO was never family like them, so King is going to take PCO out at Sacrifice.

Savannah Evans vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal are here with Evans. Purrazzo slugs away to start but gets shoved down without much effort. There’s a running splash to crush Purrazzo in the corner and Evans throws her right back out. Purrazzo manages to snap off a running hurricanrana though and Evans crashes out to the floor. The baseball slide drops Evans again but a Shaw distraction lets Evans send Purrazzo into various things.

We take a break and come back with Purrazzo still in trouble as Shaw is rather pleased. A running shoulder in the corner sets up a butterfly suplex as Purrazzo is getting crushed here. The chinlock goes on as Shaw’s slapping the mat over and over again sounds like someone knocking on a door.

Purrazzo fights up and gets a boot up in the corner before going after the arm. That doesn’t work so Purrazzo hits a running knee into a Russian legsweep. Now the Fujiwara armbar can go on, with Evans making it over to the rope. Back up and Evans snaps off a suplex but gets kicked in the head. Evans is sent to the apron but the distractions are on. Evans accidentally kicks Vidal down and Purrazzo gets rid of Shaw, setting up a crucifix to pin Evans at 13:51.

Rating: C. This was another long match and mostly a squash until Purrazzo beat up two people at once to beat Evans. Purrazzo is geared up for her match with Shaw at Sacrifice and now we should be in for a showdown tomorrow night. Evans continues to look like a monster for most of her matches but then comes up short in the end, which could go somewhere in the future.

Post match Evans lays Purrazzo out and Shaw helps out with the beating. This goes on for a bit and no one saves Purrazzo.

Flashback Moment Of The Week (They still do these?): The Motor City Machine Guns b. Team 3D and Beer Money at Sacrifice 2010.

The Death Dollz are mad at losing the Knockouts Tag Team Titles with Taya Valkyrie trying to calm the other two down. They need a new plan! Jessika isn’t having that and goes after the Coven right now, only to find….a casket. Jessika opens it up and finds….well we’re not sure as Taya slams it shut. A hand reaches out of the casket and pulls Taya in. Where to you ask? AEW.

Bully Ray/Masha Slamovich vs. Tommy Dreamer/Mickie James

For those of you who needed a preview of Dreamer vs. Ray. The men start things off with Ray going after Mickie instead. Ray wants Mickie to come in and she does exactly that after about a minute of staring. Slamovich comes in for the slugout about two minutes in but Mickie plants her with a flapjack. It’s off to Dreamer for some arm cranking before Mickie comes back in, only to have Ray pull her down by the hair.

Ray comes in for a slam as commentary is quiet for a lot of long stretches. Mickie slips away though and hands it back to Dreamer for right hands in the corner. A cutter gives Dreamer two with Slamovich making the save. The top rope seated senton drops Slamovich and Mickie plays D-Von with a WHAT’S UP (ax handle version). Everything breaks down and Ray loads up a table as Mickie dives onto Slamovich. The distraction lets Ray hit Dreamer low, setting up a piledriver for the pin at 9:26.

Rating: C. This worked when Mickie and Masha were in there, with Ray being ok enough. I’m completely with caring about anything Dreamer does, but at least his stuff was kept short. What mattered here was having the two matches set up, as strange as it is that seeing Ray pin Dreamer before they have a first blood match. Then again having them in what is very possibly the main event of a show in 2023 is strange enough.

Post match Ray loads up a powerbomb on James but here is Jordynne Grace to break it up. Grace and Ray stare each other down and Grace spears….Mickie by mistake as Ray moves.

Rich Swann and Frankie Kazarian are in the back with Swann being upset about last week. Kazarian wants him to go find Josh Alexander and settle this now. Post break Swann goes into Alexander’s locker room and finds Steve Maclin. Swann yells, with Maclin saying maybe Alexander wanted him here. Swann is confused.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry vs. Moose/Brian Myers

Before the match, Dango insists that we believe in Hendry and the fans seem pleased. Hendry headlocks Myers to start and then runs him over with a shoulder. A delayed suplex drops Myers and Dango comes in as Myers rolls into the corner. Moose comes in and takes Dango into the corner but Hendry comes in to clear the ring. Hendry and Dango have two words for us….but Dango has to be reminded that they aren’t SUCK IT.

We take a break and come back with Moose sending Dango into the corner and knocking Hendry off the apron. Myers drops Dango as the alternating beatdowns continue. Moose charges into a boot in the corner though and a middle rope corkscrew uppercut gives Dango a breather. The tag brings in Hendry to clean house and a pop up powerbomb gets two on Myers. Everything breaks down and Moose spears Hendry down. Myers’ Roster Cut finishes Hendry at 13:44.

Rating: C+. Nice tag match here which set up the title match on Friday. Hendry continues to feel like a star and someone who could be a big deal if he is given the chance at some point down the line. Seeing him get pinned in a tag match is kind of a big deal as Hendry has been such a star, but he’ll be fine if he retains the title at Sacrifice.

Josh Alexander goes into his locker room and finds Rich Swann, who wants to know why Steve Maclin was here. Alexander, who is remarkably calm about two people apparently having been in his locker room, is off to find out what is going on here.

Here is Josh Alexander to talk about Steve Maclin. Alexander has seen Maclin leave a trail of bodies around here and he can respect that. What he can’t respect is the allegation that he is ducking Maclin. All that makes Maclin is someone complaining and a…..forgotten son. Cue Maclin to say that yes he is afraid to fail because he doesn’t want to go all the way back to the bottom.

He is obsessed with winning the Impact World Title and we see clips of Maclin watching Alexander’s matches from the shadows during his title reign. Alexander says he respects Maclin so bring it on right now. Maclin says nah, because he’s going to do it in Alexander’s hometown at Rebellion.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling wasn’t great here but it did a nice enough job of building up Sacrifice. That is trickier than it seems though, as the show isn’t the biggest in the world. The main event very well may be Dreamer vs. Ray, as the only other real option is Mickie vs. Grace. Once that is out of the way though, we’re on to Rebellion and that should work well.

So……you might need to forget a good bit of this show, as both Josh Alexander (torn tricep) and Mickie James (undisclosed) are injured and have been forced to vacate their titles. The Knockouts Title will be determined at Sacrifice and the World Title at Rebellion, with Steve Maclin facing Kushida. No word on what happens to the Multiverse United card. Egads that’s horrible, as they might have just lost their two top stars at once.

Results
Time Machine b. The Design – Hoverboard Lock to Angels
Deonna Purrazzo b. Savannah Evans – Crucifix
Bully Ray/Masha Slamovich b. Mickie James/Tommy Dreamer – Piledriver to Dreamer
Moose/Brian Myers b. Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry – Roster Cut to Hendry

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 9, 2023: There’s Good And Bad

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 9, 2023
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are on our way to a trio of shows with Sacrifice, Multiverse United and Rebellion, which makes for quite the packed series of builds. That got started last week with a little something for each show getting time, but they are going to have to do it again for the next few weeks. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Here is Bully Ray to get things going. At No Surrender, Tommy Dreamer used the words “someone like me” (meaning Ray). What did he mean when he said that? Did he mean a two time Hall of Famer or half of the greatest tag team ever? Maybe a two time World Champion?

Ray wishes he knew what Dreamer meant, because he threw hot coffee into Dreamer’s face. Dreamer wants a Busted Open match at Sacrifice but there is no way Dreamer is making it there. Cue Santino Marella to call Bully “Bobby Ray” and say that Dreamer will be at Sacrifice. It was only a minor burn to his balls….er, eyeball so he’ll be fine.

Cue Bhupinder Gujjar to speak Hindi and issue a challenge for right now. Santino makes the match and we’re on. This Santino stuff is getting REALLY old as he’s still doing the same “gee I sure do talk funny” shtick, which can be charming for all of 12 seconds before you realize that he’s making the crowd chuckle over what was supposed to be a serious angle.

Bhupinder Gujjar vs. Bully Ray

Ray’s chain shot doesn’t work to start so he clotheslines Gujjar down instead. Gujjar gets up and yells a lot, seemingly inviting Ray to hit him. Ray’s right hands are shrugged off and Gujjar dropkicks him down. Ray catches him on top though and loads up the chain, which takes too long as well, allowing Gujjar to get in a shot of his own. Gujjar loads up the chain but gets low blowed for the DQ at 3:31.

Rating: D+. Remember when Gujjar was looking like he could be something? Well now he’s cannon fodder in the star making feud between Bully Ray and Tommy Dreamer. This was hardly a high energy match and was much more about Ray trying to get out of having the actual match. Nothing to see here, but thank goodness Ray got his time in.

Post match Ray chains Gujjar in the back but Tommy Dreamer comes in for the save (Why didn’t he come out earlier?). Cue Masha Slamovich to hit Dreamer low but Mickie James makes the save. The women brawl until Dreamer gets up to chase Ray off with a chair.

PCO is next to a grave with a shovel and screams for Eddie Edwards to come fight him.

Josh Alexander comes up to Rich Swann and gets him on his team for a six man at Sacrifice. Steve Maclin comes in but Swann says this isn’t about him. Frankie Kazarian comes in and Maclin leaves, with Kazarian seemingly joining Swann and Alexander at Sacrifice.

Callihan vs. Rhino

The Design and Heath are here too. They trade shoulders to start and neither goes anywhere. The fight heads outside with Callihan raking the eyes and posting him to take over. A Russian legsweep on the ramp puts Rhino down again and the seconds get in an argument. We take a break and come back with Rhino hitting a TKO for two, followed by a belly to belly. A hard clothesline out of the corner cuts Rhino off but it’s too early for the Cactus Driver 97. Angels grabs Callihan’s foot though and Khan adds a chair to the face, allowing Rhino to hit the Gore for the pin at 10:11.

Rating: C. This was as good as a ten minute Rhino vs. Callihan match was going to be as there is only so much the two of them are going to pull off. Rhino is still able to have a watchable enough match and it is nice to see him get a win here. At the same time, the Callihan/Design stuff is still pretty horrible and it needs to wrap up soon. It won’t, but it needs to.

Trey Miguel interrupts Dirty Dango and Santino Marella in the back, asking what they’re going to do for him. That works for Santino, who makes Miguel vs. a handpicked opponent at Sacrifice, plus a six way match for the X-Division Title at Multiverse United. Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in to see if Miguel is as tall as Sky Low Low. With Miguel gone, Swinger asks about facing Dango, who says he’s the assistant Director of Authority. Swinger and Dice leave, so Marella says that isn’t Dango’s job. Dango: “It’s not a job. It’s a way of life.”

During the break, Callihan was mad at the Design but was told that was step #6.

Jordynne Grace vs. Alex Gracia

Grace powers her into the corner to start as we hear about Grace competing as a bodybuilder. A German suplex out of the corner gets two on Gracia but the Grace Driver is blocked. Instead Grace grabs a torture rack spin into a powerbomb. Now the Grace Driver finishes Gracia off at 2:26.

Moose comes up to Joe Hendry, who is telling jokes to a bunch of fans. Brian Myers jumps Hendry from behind and the big beatdown is on.

The Bullet Club, complete with Kenta, come in to mock Josh Alexander/Frankie Kazarian/Rich Swann. The six man is set for next week. Alexander mocks Ace Austin and Chris Bey for being overly excited about being the Tag Team Champions, which doesn’t sit well with the champs.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Kushida

They go technical to start (yes really) with neither being able to get very far. Instead they shake hands and spin around a lot while fighting over arm control. Neither gets very far so Kushida takes it to the mat and rides him a bit. Gresham reverses into a hammerlock on the mat but Kushida gets to his feet, with Gresham still cranking away. It’s finally broken up and Kushida stomps on Gresham’s hand but Gresham is right back with another armbar.

Kushida’s armbar sends Gresham to the rope so Kushida dropkicks the arm to keep him in trouble. Gresham is right back with la majistral for two so he tries it again, only to get reversed into a cradle to give Kushida two of his own. Back up and Kushida sends him into the ropes, which bangs up Gresham’s arm again. The Hoverboard Lock makes Gresham tap at 10:04.

Rating: B-. This was the technical match that you knew it would be and it made Kushida look that much better because he beat someone on his level. Both of them are established names but Kushida is on his way to the World Title shot at Multiverse United so he needed the win here. Good match, and different from everything else on the show.

Eddie Edwards goes to the grave where PCO called him out. That sounds like a very bad idea.

Here is Killer Kelly to sit in a chair and call out Taylor Wilde. Cue Wilde, who says this isn’t about Kelly but rather the future. Kelly doesn’t think much of Wilde telling the future with cards, because she controls her own destiny. Taylor pulls out the tower card and it’s KiLynn King coming in from behind to chair Kelly down. A Death Valley Driver plants Kelly again. I’ve liked King in the past so this is interesting.

Still at the grave, PCO swings his shovel at a rock.

The Death Dollz teleport in to console Killer Kelly, with Rosemary telling her that she needs to grasp the darker realm. Kelly doesn’t seem convinced but says she can handle a 2-1 situation herself. With Kelly gone, KiLynn King and Taylor Wilde come in to make the Knockouts Tag Team Titles challenge. Rosemary is in, if King and Wilde agree to give up the dark arts if they lose. Deal.

Eddie Edwards arrives at the grave but there is no PCO. Then PCO pops up behind him but misses the big swing with the shovel. They fight a bit and PCO sends him into a rock. Eddie manages to grab the shovel but PCO drops him with a reverse DDT (as you do in a fight by a grave). PCO sends him into the grave but here’s a car to run PCO over. Eddie gets in the car and rides away but we never see who is driving.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Knockouts Title: Gisele Shaw vs. Mickie James

Shaw, with Jai Vidal and Savannah Evans, is challenging and Deonna Purrazzo is on commentary. Mickie takes her down with a headlock to start but gets reversed into a headscissors. Back up and they fight over wrist control until Mickie sends her outside for a crash to send us to a break.

We come back with Shaw sending her into the corner to take over. Mickie’s Thesz press gives her a breather though and they slowly slug it out. Shaw gets the better of things and grabs a reverse chinlock to keep James down. Back up and Shaw charges into a boot in the corner, allowing Mickie to hurricanrana her out. The comeback is on but Mickie has to dive onto the goons on the floor.

Shaw gets in a cheap shot to take over again though and the chops have Mickie in trouble in the corner. A pull of the hair drops Mickie again but she explodes out of the corner for the double knockdown. Mickie strikes away and hits a flapjack as the referee seems to tell her how much time is left. The top rope Thesz press gets two on Shaw but Vidal’s distraction breaks up the MickieDT. Purrazzo breaks that up so Shaw grabs a rollup, only to have Purrazzo turn it back over so Mickie can retain at 17:00.

Rating: B-. This match got a lot of time and the ending seems to bring Purrazzo either into the title picture or in line for a showdown with Shaw (or perhaps both). For now though, these two had a good match, with Shaw holding up her end and James being her usual awesome self. It felt like a big time main event and that is a hard trick to pull off a lot of the time.

Overall Rating: C+. This show got better as it went on but there were definitely some rocky points. There are some parts here which just aren’t very good and give me no reason to want to see what happens in them from week to week. Stuff such as Ray vs. Dreamer and the Design/Callihan stuff is just there with few positives to either of them and it hurts to watch them. Then on the other hand you have the solid Knockouts division and the main event feuds, though a lot of that seems to be on hold until we get closer to the build to Rebellion. For now though, the bad stuff gets bailed out, as the positives are quite positive.

Results
Bhupinder Gujjar b. Bully Ray via DQ when Ray hit him low
Rhino b. Callihan – Gore
Jordynne Grace b. Alex Gracia – Grace Driver
Kushida b. Jonathan Gresham – Hoverboard Lock
Mickie James b. Gisele Shaw – Rollup

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – March 2, 2023: They Needed Some New Blood

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 2, 2023
Location: Sam’s Town Hotel & Gambling Hall, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are done with No Surrender and that means we are at least one step closer to Rebellion in April. Josh Alexander is still the World Champion after retaining over Rich Swann, but now Steve Maclin is waiting on the champ. That should make for a good buildup and they have time to make it work. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of No Surrender.

Here is the Bullet Club for a chat to start. Chris Bey is rather happy about what he and Ace Austin have been doing lately, including beating the Motor City Machine Guns (in a six man tag) at No Surrender. Bey talks about helping set up the ring in this building before making his Impact Wrestling debut here as well. It turns out that Austin debuted here too but he would rather talk about beating Chris Sabin.

After revealing Austin’s “I BEAT CHRIS SABIN”, we get a quick audience poll over who the best team around here really is. Cue the Motor City Machine Guns, with Sabin asking how long the Club has been together. The Guns have been around since 2006 and they’re still the champs. The Club says that is just because they haven’t gotten a fair shot. Maybe they could fix that at Sacrifice? The Guns talk about how they are still the best team and offer the title match tonight. Game/match on.

Shane Haste, who is going to be part of Multiverse United on March 30, he is ready to take out Mike Bailey tonight. He even throws in some karate moves.

Rich Swann cuts off a question about his loss at No Surrender to admit that yes, he did lose. That doesn’t sit well with him but he isn’t going to let that loss define him. He wants the World Title back but here are Raj Singh and Shera, the former of which has a lot of money that he keeps handing out. Swann isn’t happy and is ready to fight Shera but Singh calms it down and wants to hit the casino instead.

Mike Bailey vs. Shane Haste

Bailey takes him down to start and they grapple on the mat until Haste has to duck a big kick. A snapmare sets up a basement dropkick to the back of Bailey’s head but he strikes his way out of trouble. The bouncing kicks send Haste to the apron but he’s fine enough to drop Bailey onto the apron. Bailey’s head is crushed against the post before Haste takes him back inside for a Saito suplex.

We take a break and come back with Haste still hammering away but getting shoved off the top. A missile dropkick hits Haste and Bailey gets to kick away. Haste kicks him in the face though and suplexes him into a cutter for two. Bailey fights back and sends him outside for a springboard moonsault. One heck of a dropkick sets up a sitout Last Ride for two on Bailey back inside. Bailey counters a fireman’s carry into a poisonrana though and a superkick drops Haste again. The Ultimate Weapon finishes Haste at 14:40.

Rating: C+. This was a hard hitting match that made Haste look good but Bailey is too big of a star to lose here. Haste is someone who will be around at Multiverse United and then leave while Bailey is likely to be around a lot longer. It wouldn’t surprise me to see Bailey in the World Title hunt sooner rather than later so he isn’t losing here.

The Design is in the back when Rhino comes in. Rhino doesn’t like what the team does and he won’t let them do it to Sami Callihan. Cue Callihan to say he’s where he wants to be, so Rhino says he’ll knock some sanity into Callihan. Deaner calls this step #6.

Kenny King vs. Kevin Knight

King isn’t interested in a handshake and elbows Knight in the face instead. Knight is back up and knocks King outside, which means a missed dive with King sidestepping him in a not quite Samoa Joe counter. King tries to throw him back in but gets caught with a dive. Back in for real this time and King strikes him down for two before grabbing the reverse chinlock.

The swinging backbreaker gets two on Knight and we’re off to a camel clutch. Knight is back up with some rollups for two each, followed by a pump kick. A springboard spinning crossbody gives Knight two but King grabs a spinebuster for the same. The Royal Flush gives King the pin at 6:01.

Rating: C. Knight is someone who has potential but for now he is in need of ring time. He wrestles an exciting enough style and can work with anyone, though King seems like he is on the way to a title shot sooner than later. This was a completely watchable match, though it didn’t come near the next level.

We look at Kushida holding Josh Alexander in the Hoverboard Lock during the pin in a tag match at New Japan Battle In The Valley.

Josh Alexander is read to face Kushida at Rebellion. First though, he has to get by Kushida at Multiverse United, but first he wants a six man tag at Sacrifice. It can be Kushida/the Motor City Machine Guns against Alexander and whomever he can find. Cue Steve Maclin to say keep the title safe until Rebellion.

We look at Bully Ray throwing coffee at Tommy Dreamer at No Surrender.

The doctor tells Santino Marella and Dirty Dango about Dreamer’s condition. Bully Ray comes in to make sure Dreamer will live so he can beat Dreamer up. Bhupinder Gujjar comes in to yell at Ray, who doesn’t have time for this because Gujjar won’t be relevant in ten years. Gujjar grabs him by the sweatshirt and says Dreamer is his friend. Ray can respect that…and then slaps him in the face.

Here is Mickie James to be glad about retaining her Knockouts Title against Masha Slamovich at No Surrender. No one said she could do it but then she did it. Now though, there is a little bit of controversy as Jordynne Grace is saying Mickie tapped out at Hard To Kill. Mickie has been saying that since she got done with Masha…and here are Gisele Shaw and company to interrupt.

Shaw says Mickie is going after Grace to hide from the real challenger and ducking her. Mickie brings up that she beat Shaw already, but Shaw says that wasn’t THIS version of her. We hear about how great Shaw is and she says she’s waiting for Mickie when Mickie is done with Grace. Mickie is ready to fight now but Shaw isn’t in her gear. That’s the difference between a diva and a woman as Mickie still wants to fight, so here is Gail Kim to make the match.

Moose comes in to see Brian Myers and says he wants to humiliate Joe Hendry. Myers seems intrigued. Hendry has beaten Moose twice now. Why is this still going?

Jordynne Grace isn’t happy with Gisele Shaw getting a title shot but she’ll have hers at Sacrifice. Santino Marella says deal but then gets interrupted by Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice. Swinger says no one can win fifty straight matches and he is tired of having everyone against him. Marella makes him a deal: he can pick ANYONE on the roster to face. Works for Swinger.

PCO vs. Trey Miguel

Non-title and this could be interesting. Miguel bails to the apron to start but gets pulled in for a crash. PCO blasts him with a clothesline and they head outside with PCO hitting a hard backbreaker. The running flip dive through the ropes only hits floor though and the PCO shaped thud sounds rather painful. We take a break and come back with Miguel kicking him down but PCO stands right back up. There’s a pop up powerbomb to plant Miguel again but Eddie Edwards comes in and hits PCO in the back with a shovel for the DQ at 8:42.

Rating: C+. I liked this one and could go for more with either being the good or bad guy. Miguel having to run and try to survive against the monster is interesting but Miguel trying to slay the monster as the underdog hero could work as well. This could have been more but Edwards vs. PCO is the real feud and you don’t want your champion losing, even to someone as unstoppable as PCO.

Post match PCO goes after Edwards, with security breaking it up. That’s fine with PCO, who PCOsaults down onto all of them (that was scary/great).

Here is what is coming on various shows, including a Mercedes Mone promo for her match against Kairi.

Tag Team Titles: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Bullet Club

Bullet Club is challenging. Sabin and Austin flip out of an exchange of wristlocks to start but everyone comes in for the staredown. Shelley comes in to take Austin down but it’s off to Bey for the slugout. Everything breaks down and Sabin accidentally shoulders Shelley in the corner. The Guns are sent outside for the stereo suicide dives as the Club is rolling here.

Back in and Austin slices Shelley’s mouth with the playing card before sliding the card up his sleeve (he’s not a great magician if you can see it on national TV). Shelley manages a shot to Bey’s weakened (by Kushida over the last few weeks, as mentioned by commentary) arm and Sabin gets in a cheap shot behind the referee’s back (that’s different). Sabin even dives off the apron to drop Bey on the floor as Shelley takes Austin off the apron (and takes his place to offer Bey a tag in a funny bit). The Border City Stretch doesn’t last long but Sabin kicks Bey’s arm from the apron as we take a break.

Back with Shelley chopping the post instead of Bey and Sabin doing the same. Bey still can’t get over for the tag as Sabin stomps on the arm on the apron. An enziguri gets Bey out of trouble and it’s Austin coming back in to start cleaning house. Everything breaks down and Bey hits the one armed flip dive to drop the Guns.

Back in and Sabin hits his tornado DDT/dropkick combination but Austin kicks Sabin down again. Sabin gets a standing Kimura on Bey as Shelley takes Austin down by the leg. Cradle Shock is broken up and Bey hits a quick cutter on Sabin. Shelley gets dropped with a cutter of his own but the assisted Art of Finesse is broken up. A doomsday missile dropkick hits Bey and Shell Shock gives Shelley two.

The Border City Stretch sends Bey to the rope so Shelley puts it on again. Austin’s save fails as he gets caught in Cradle Shock as Bey reverses Shelley into a rollup for two more. The Guns kick Bey in the head but Austin makes the save. A pair of spinning kicks to the head send Sabin outside. The assisted Art of Finesse into the Fold is enough to give Bey the pin and the titles at 22:04.

Rating: B. This was a heck of a match and it was interesting to see the roles reversed. You don’t see the Guns working heel that often and while they were only leaning into it here, it was different enough to catch your attention. At the same time, the Club won completely clean, which is more than I would have expected. Awesome match here and the Club feels like a breakout team waiting to happen.

The new champs celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The main event is by far the best part here and it anchored a strong show. They have some momentum coming out of No Surrender, but at the same time, they are now building towards three shows at once. That could get more than a little complicated, but at least Rebellion is far enough away that Sacrifice and Multiverse United can be covered before we get there. Very good show here and I liked pretty much everything.

Results
Mike Bailey b. Shane Haste – Ultimate Weapon
Kenny King b. Kevin Knight – Royal Flush
PCO b. Trey Miguel via DQ when Eddie Edwards interfered
Bullet Club b. Motor City Machine Guns – Fold to Shelley

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – February 9, 2023: Fare Not Well

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 9, 2023
Location: Osceola Heritage Park, Kissimmee, Florida
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

No Surrender is coming up and most of the card has been set up so far. That includes the World Title match, which has not exactly gotten a ton of hype. Maybe it is because it seems we have another challenger on the horizon, but Rich Swann challenging Josh Alexander isn’t exactly feeling huge. Hopefully they can get some more of it covered this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Matt Cardona arrives and says he’s in the main event tonight. He is shown to his private dressing room with champagne and shrimp cocktails, but it turns out this is Joe Hendry’s room. Cardona is shown to a closet instead.

No Surrender #1 Contenders Qualifying Match: Brian Myers vs. Dirty Dango

They run the ropes to start until Dango armdrags him into an armbar. Myers’ sunset flip is blocked and Dango drops a leg before they head outside. A posting cuts Dango off and of course Myers is fine to try for a countout. Back in and we hit the chinlock, complete with trash talking. Dango fights up and they collide for a double knockdown. A Russian legsweep sets up the Dirtbag Shuffle, followed by a top rope ax handle to send Myers outside. That’s fine with Myers who hits a Roster Cut on the floor, followed by another inside for the pin at 6:50.

Rating: C. I’m kind of digging the more serious Dango, who has been shifting away from a lot of the comedy and wrestling more traditional matches. As it turns out, he can do those well enough to get by and even do well in some places. Myers is a bigger name and easier to take more seriously so it makes sense for him to win, but Dango has been doing well lately.

Gisele Shaw, with Jai Vidal, messes up a few meals at catering. Deonna Purrazzo doesn’t like what Shaw has been saying lately though and throws what looks like chili in her face. Santino Marella comes in to make a No Surrender match.

Trey Miguel thinks Crazzy Steve is in fact crazy and wants nothing more to do with him. Steve’s laughter is heard and a bloody version of Miguel’s logo appears. Miguel freaks out.

Good Hands vs. Mickie James/Tommy Dreamer

Before the match, the Good Hands talk about how much they hate Florida, which is nowhere as valuable as a hand. Mickie and Hotch start things off with Mickie taking him down without much effort. Dreamer comes in to stay on the arm with James coming right back in with a top rope ax handle to said arm. Skyler comes in so Dreamer sends both of the Hands outside.

Dreamer’s dive off the apron takes both of them down again, followed by Mickie hitting a big dive of her own. The Texas Cloverleaf is on but Hotch makes a quick save. It’s Dreamer getting taken down in the corner for a hip attack but he’s right back up with a cutter. Mickie comes back in to clean house, including the flapjack into the top rope Thesz press. The MickieDT finishes Hotch at 5:22.

Rating: C. Intergender wrestling can be tricky to pull off but they made it work well here. James is one of the most successful women’s wrestlers of all time and it isn’t too much to believe that she could beat one of Bully Ray’s lackeys. Dreamer vs. Ray is still a bit much to take as one of the bigger feuds in the company, but that is where everything seems to be heading.

Post match Bully Ray comes in and decks Dreamer, allowing Masha Slamovich to come in and take out Mickie.

Johnny Swinger, with Zicky Dice, asks Santino Marella for his next match as part of his path to 50 wins. Dirty Dango, the Deputy Director Of Authority, comes in to cut off a bribe attempt but Dice knows someone Swinger can beat.

Video on Rich Swann and how important it was to him to be World Champion. He didn’t get to have fans around, but he knows he inspired a lot of people. Then he lost to Kenny Omega when AEW worked with Impact. Josh Alexander wound up as champion so now Swann wants his belt back. He has his mojo back, so now he needs the title to go with it. This was a different look at Swann and the best thing in the build to the title match thus far.

Steph DeLander vs. Jordynne Grace

DeLander was Persia Pirotta in NXT and here, she promises to be everyone’s worst nightmare. DeLander starts fast by sending her to the apron but Grace powers her way out of trouble. With DeLander on the floor, Grace hits a dropkick through the ropes for two back inside. A quick shot lets DeLander have a breather though and we hit the chinlock.

Grace is right back up though and shrugs off a suplex, setting up the dead lift German suplex for two on DeLander. The Grace Driver is blocked so Grace sends her into the corner. DeLander grabs Snake Eyes into a big boot (seems to be an Undertaker fan), only to have Grace pop back up. The Grace Driver finishes DeLander at 5:02.

Rating: C. Another just ok match in a series of them tonight as DeLander got in a bunch but wound up losing to the bigger star. Grace is going to be back in the title picture sooner than later so giving her a win, even while breaking a sweat, is a good thing. That being said, DeLander was hardly a big star in NXT and I’m not sure how much value she has coming in here. Maybe she can prove herself, and she did start well here.

Matt Cardona is still mad about having to change in a closet so he asks for another dressing room. He gets another one….which is outside.

Josh Alexander respects Rich Swann and knows that Swann only lost one match on one night. Now Swann has his chance to get back but here is Kenny King to interrupt. King wants to know why he isn’t getting a title shot but Swann comes in to say King has to earn it. Swann punches him in the face and Alexander lets them go, only to have King back off.

Killer Kelly/Taylor Wilde vs. Death Dollz

Non-title and it’s Taya Valkyrie and Rosemary for the Dollz. Taya takes Kelly down to start and it’s off to Rosemary to hammer away with right hands. A fall away slam out of the corner sets up the Upside Down as Wilde is looking at her tarot cards on the apron. Wilde comes in and grabs a quick backbreaker to take Rosemary down for the first time.

A fisherman’s suplex gives Kelly two and it’s right back to Wilde for some forearms. Rosemary manages her half of a double clothesline, which is enough to bring Taya back in. Kelly manages to take her down again but Wilde finds the devil card. That means she won’t tag in, allowing a Road To Valhalla with an X Factor from Rosemary to finish Kelly at 6:03.

Rating: C+. Impact’s Knockouts division deserves a lot of credit as they have turned it into something rather entertaining most of the time. There is some depth here and Kelly and Wilde are coming along quite well. The Death Dollz need some challengers though and I’m not sure if there is a team around at the moment to fill that spot.

Post match it’s Father James Mitchell making his return and saying Rosemary hasn’t been paying proper respect to Mitchell’s boss/her father. Therefore, Mitchell is here with a hex….in the form of the Hex, Marti Belle/Allysin Kay (former NWA Women’s Tag Team Champions). The Dollz are laid out.

Eddie Edwards wants Shera to take out PCO as an act of friendship. Edwards seems to offer money as an extra incentive.

Kushida praises the Motor City Machine Guns for their success. The Bullet Club comes in and seems to want a title shot but get a six man tag at No Surrender, with Kenta being promised as their partner.

No Surrender #1 Contenders Qualifying Match: PCO vs. Shera

Raj Singh is here as PCO hammers on Shera to start. A punch to the throat sends Shera outside to set up the suicide flip dive as the fans approve of PCO. Singh’s distraction lets Shera get in a few shots of his own but PCO, busted open, sits up and looks a bit perturbed. PCO runs Shera over while screaming about Eddie Edwards. The PCOsault finishes Shera at 3:10.

Rating: C. The match was more or less a squash and I can appreciate it going that way. There is only so much of a reason to believe that Shera was anything resembling a threat to PCO so just let him run Shera over. PCO isn’t likely to win at No Surrender, but I could absolutely see him being a challenger of the month as a wild card.

Matt Cardona is back inside and finds Brian Myers in Joe Hendry’s dressing room, but apparently it is just for the shrimp. Some people come in singing Hendry’s song and Myers claps along with them. Myers: “It’s a catchy song.”

Frankie Kazarian tries to talk Sami Callihan out of joining the Design but Sami thinks Kazarian has the sickness. The Design comes in and Kazarian issues a challenge to Big Kon.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Matt Cardona

Hendry is defending and refers to Cardona as Edge’s b**** before the match. He knows the people believe in him though and that’s what will be going through his head during the match. Cardona hits Radio Silence at the bell for two and the kickout leaves him livid. They go outside with Hendry hammering away and sending him right back inside.

A spinning slam sets up a delayed suplex for two on Cardona, who needs a breather on the floor. Cardona sweeps the leg on the apron and grabs a neckbreaker on the outside as we take a break. Back with Cardona choking in the corner, setting up a neckbreaker for two. Hendry tries a suplex but gets reversed into another neckbreaker for another two. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Cardona switches into a guillotine.

That’s reversed with a suplex and they’re both down for a breather. Hendry makes the clothesline comeback, setting up the fall away slam to send Cardona flying. Cardona grabs the rope so a DDT can plant Hendry for two of his own. The Reboot is blocked and Hendry cutters him for two. Another Radio Silence gives Cardona another near fall so here is Brian Myers to throw in the belt. The distraction lets Myers hit the Roster Cut….on Cardona by mistake. Myers is sent outside and the Standing Ovation retains the title at 13:02.

Rating: B-. This got rolling near the end as Hendry can wrestle a good match when he is given the chance. They might have something with him as that charisma can’t be ignored. At the same time, Cardona’s transformation from total goof into solid heel (including the physical transformation) is incredibly impressive. He feels like a star so Hendry beating him is a good step forward.

Post match Moose comes in and goes after Hendry but spears Cardona by mistake. Hendry dispatches Moose and plays Cardona’s new song again to end the show. If that’s not it for Cardona around here, they missed a golden opportunity to send him off in an all time humiliating way.

Overall Rating: C+. Impact got back on their good side this week with a solid enough show that actually made me more interested in the World Title match at No Surrender. Other than that, the Cardona stuff was rather funny as he does a great job at getting humiliated. Fun show here and, as usual, they built towards the future, which is one of their strong suits these days.

Results
Brian Myers b. Dirty Dango – Roster Cut
Mickie James/Tommy Dreamer b. Good Hands – MickieDT to Hotch
Jordynne Grace b. Steph DeLander – Grace Driver
Death Dollz b. Killer Kelly/Taylor Wilde – Road To Valhalla/Facebuster combination to Kelly
PCO b. Shera – PCOsault
Joe Hendry b. Matt Cardona – Standing Ovation

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – February 2, 2023: Who Does That Help?

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 2, 2023
Location: Osceola Heritage Park, Kissimmee, Florida
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

It’s the start of a new month and we are well on our way to No Surrender. Last week saw Rich Swann win a #1 contenders match to earn a shot at Josh Alexander later this month, but it still feels like we are coming up on Steve Maclin as the really big bad. Odds are we see more of the build this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

The setup is different this week as the camera isn’t facing the video screen, making it look more like a WWE or AEW show.

Bullet Club vs. Kevin Knight/Kushida

Knight and Ace start things off with Bey’s headlock not getting him very far. Knight misses a charge into the corner and Bey stomps him in the back, only to get caught with a springboard spinning crossbody. It’s off to Kushida to start in on the arm but it’s right back to Knight, whose springboard is dropkicked out of the air. Austin comes in to stomp Knight down for two and he kicks away at Knight in the corner. The Club starts taking turns on Knight, with Austin grabbing a chinlock.

That’s broken up and Knight dives over for the tag to Kushida. Everything breaks down and Knight and Bey wind up on their opponents’ shoulders for a slugout. With that broken up, Knight dropkicks Bey off Kushida’s shoulders (without needing ropes for a boost) for two but Austin knocks Knight down. Austin gets sent outside so Knight tries a springboard….which is pulled into a cutter from Bey onto the apron (that was SWEET). Back in and the Art of Finesse into the Fold finishes Knight at 9:25.

Rating: C+. This was the kind of match that regularly opens Impact a good chunk of the time and they made it work here. The Club has become a very nice team who can make almost anything work and they did it again this week. Beating Kushida, even without pinning him, is a big deal and I could go with the Club getting a bigger spot.

Deaner isn’t happy with Sami Callihan for losing the Golden Six Shooter last week. He failed there, but he can make up for it with a win tonight.

Steph DeLander (formerly Persia Pirotta in NXT) debuts next week.

Gisele Shaw vs. Savannah Evans

Jai Vidal is with Shaw while Evans wants to prove she can do this herself. They talk trash to start until and Evans punches her into the corner. Shaw strikes away but gets shoulders in the corner and butterfly suplexes back out of it. We take a break and come back with Evans hitting a Samoan drop into a spinebuster for two. A fisherman’s suplex gets the same but a Vidal distraction lets Shaw hit a superkick. The running knee finishes Evans at 8:24.

Rating: C-. Shaw is doing something interesting with the Black Widow thing and it makes sense for her to win here. If nothing else, she is getting more of a character and that is something that has been lacking for a long time. The match wasn’t very good, but at least it went the right way.

Post match Shaw says some people call her the Black Widow of the Knockouts Division because she gets rid of people. She doesn’t care how many people she has run off and belongs in the spotlight because she is a star.

Kenny King runs into two guys and doesn’t like that they aren’t talking about him. King steals their chips and then runs into Zicky Dice and Johnny Swinger. More disrespect ensues and King is ready to get a match with Swinger as a result. Swinger isn’t pleased, but he’ll trust Dice.

Post break Santino Marella makes a match between King and Swinger. King leaves and here is Steve Maclin to say he should be #1 contender. Marella puts him in a match to get to a #1 contenders match at No Surrender. Maclin isn’t pleased but leaves, with Dirty Dango coming in. Dango will do whatever Marella needs, but he wants in one of the qualifying matches too. Deal.

Crazzy Steve vs. Sheldon Jean

Black Taurus is here with Steve. They fight over wrist control to start with Jean taking him down by the head and getting in a kick. Back up and Steve bites him in the face, setting up some clotheslines in the corner. There’s the Cannonball and Belladonna’s Kiss finishes Jean at 2:25.

Post match Trey Miguel runs in with the spray paint but Steve takes it away and paints himself.

Jordynne Grace has her guaranteed rematch for the Knockouts Champion but for now she’ll settle for beating up Steph DeLander next week.

Santino Marella comes in to see Raven, who has an idea of how to make money for the company: make Raven the champ. Reese (of WCW fame) comes in to ask if they’re getting the Flock together. Raven: “Shut up Yeti.”

Here is Bully Ray for a chat. After a lot of booing, Ray talks about how he doesn’t think people like him. Management, the fans, the industry as a whole? None of them like him! Ray knows that the boss doesn’t like him because he wasn’t in the #1 contenders match with former World Champions. Ray: “Raise your hand if you know what I’m talking about. Now look at everybody doing what I tell them to do.” After a warning to Santino Marella, Ray shifts over to Tommy Dreamer, who has never gotten along with him. Dreamer is nothing but a phony who wants everyone to love him but that can’t happen.

Cue Mickie James to interrupt because Ray interrupted her big moment. Mickie finds it funny that Ray is calling Dreamer a politicking liar when that is all Ray does. Ray tells her to stop smiling and threatens violence before calling her a tramp. That earns Ray a slap so Ray slams her (NOT A SLAM!). Cue the Good Hands for a table but Dreamer makes the save. Violence is teased but here is Santino Marella to make Mickie/Dreamer vs. the Good Hands. That hardly seems fair.

Killer Kelly has already beaten Taylor Wilde but Wilde won’t leet it go. If Wilde wants another match, so be it. Cue Wilde, who wants to team with Kelly. The Death Dollz teleport in and the match seems to be made.

Johnny Swinger vs. Kenny King

Zicky Dice is here with Swinger, who is still trying to win 50 matches to get a World Title match. Swinger hides in the ropes over and over before bailing into the corner from the threat of a kick to the face. Dice offers a distraction but King kicks Swinger in the face anyway. The Royal Flush finishes Swinger at 1:43.

Post match King puts every champion on notice and says he’s coming for the titles.

Bully Ray comes up to Masha Slamovich and wants her to beat up Mickie James at No Surrender. Slamovich doesn’t seem to speak English.

Matt Cardona debuts a rap video in response to Joe Hendry. Apparently he’s going to take Hendry’s mom on a date. With the video over, Brian Myers reminds Cardona that he is married. No matter though, as Cardona is going to take the title.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Josh Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian/Yuya Uemura vs. Callihan/The Design

Callihan seems to have lost his first name. Deaner and Swann start things off but it’s off to Callihan before anything happens. Callihan takes over and hands it off to Deaner, who gets taken down. Uemura hits a dropkick to take over and Alexander comes in, with Deaner biting him head. Everything breaks down and Kon sends Swann to the apron, where a big flip dive takes out the pile at ringside.

We take a break and come back with Kazarian chopping Angels and Uemura nowhere to be seen. Kazarian hits the springboard legdrop but it’s off to Swann, who gets taken down for a change. Deaner comes in to drop an elbow before handing it off to Kon. Uemura is back on the apron as Kon works on a nerve hold. The Design takes turns beating on Swann, including Deaner hitting a middle rope dropkick.

Kon punches the post though and the diving tag brings in Alexander to clean house. Kon and Alexander have their big showdown with Alexander not being able to hit the German suplex. Everything breaks down and Deaner counters the C4 Spike. We hit the parade of secondary finishers until Deaner pushes Uemura off the top. The Cactus Driver finishes for Callihan at 16:45.

Rating: C+. This was a weird one as they did a lot of the stuff right, but it didn’t do anything to make more more interested in seeing Swann vs. Alexander. If nothing else, this was more about Callihan and the Design, which is hardly a story that I need to see keep going. It was a completely decent, if not pretty good, eight man main event, but I’m not sure how much it accomplished.

Overall Rating: C. Kind of a weird show here as it built towards a bunch of stuff, but I’m not sure how interesting most of it is going to be. The majority of the show’s big angles were Callihan/The Design and Mickie James/Tommy Dreamer vs. Bully Ray. That sounds like something you get from a random match generator rather than a regular show, but Impact has actually earned the benefit of the doubt lately. Not a bad show, but a skippable one.

Results
Bullet Club b. Kevin Knight/Kushida – Fold to Knight
Gisele Shaw b. Savannah Evans – Running knee
Crazzy Steve b. Sheldon Jean – Belladonna’s Kiss
Kenny King b. Johnny Swinger – Royal Flush
Design/Callihan b. Yuyu Uemura/Josh Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian – Cactus Driver to Uemura

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – January 12, 2023: They Did What They Needed To

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 12, 2023
Location: Charles F. Dodge City Center, Pembroke Pines, Florida
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s the go home show for Hard To Kill and since Impact does their pay per views on Fridays, the show is tomorrow night. That should mean the card is intact but you never know around here. Hopefully the roll can continue around here, as it has been a rather nice few weeks in a row. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Bully Ray’s rise to the top of the company, including him attacking Scott D’Amore last week.

We get a Zoom interview with Josh Matthews talking to Bully Ray and Josh Alexander, both at their homes. Alexander knows Ray is going after everyone he cares about and they will be in his mind at Hard To Kill. Ray thinks Alexander has given away his hand because Ray is in his head. Last week Ray didn’t need to have an Anthem executive take a swing at him.

Ray talks about how he has gotten Alexander to do whatever he wants, because Ray knows he can’t wrestle Alexander for one hour. That’s why he dragged Alexander into Full Metal Mayhem, which is Ray’s kind of match. Alexander doesn’t care because he’s ready for anything, but Ray loves hearing that, because Alexander has no idea what kind of pain is coming. Ray walks out and Alexander is ready. There was nothing revolutionary being said here, but points for doing it in a different way.

Brian Myers vs. Heath

Matt Cardona and Rhino are here too. They go technical to start with Myers taking him to the mat for some slaps to the back of the head. Back up and Heath hits a running forearm in the corner before raining down some right hands. Everyone almost gets into it on the floor so Rhino and Cardona are both gone. Heath uses the distraction to hit a running flip dive off the apron to take Myers out. Myers is right back with a running forearm and we take a break.

Back with Myers grabbing the chinlock but Heath fights up and starts slugging away. A release flapjack plants Myers and a neckbreaker gives Heath two. It’s too early for the Wake Up Call though, allowing Myers to grab the implant DDT for two of his own. The Roster Cut misses so Myers spears him down for another near fall. Myers goes up but gets super powerslammed (cool) back down, meaning it’s time to slug it out. They go up top with Heath being knocked down and Myers dropping the elbow for two. Myers yells at the referee though and it’s the Wake Up Call to give Heath the pin at 12:18.

Rating: B-. These two were actually having a heck of a match here and I’ll take that every time. Neither of them are exactly known for tearing it up out there and usually stay in the “eh, that was fine” category. This was a rather entertaining match and maybe the best I’ve seen from the two of them on their own.

Ace Austin and Chris Bey are ready to win the Tag Team Titles.

Someone has attacked Taya Valkyrie and Rosemary wants revenge. Taya says the four of them did this.

Savannah Evans vs. Rosemary

Tasha Steelz, Gisele Shaw, Jai Vidal (likely the rest of the four) and Jessicka are here too. They go straight to the power brawling to start with Rosemary hammering her into the corner to take over. That’s reversed so Evans can fire off forearms in the corner, only to have Rosemary come off the middle rope with a forearm of her own. Evans bails to the floor so Rosemary dives onto her and Vidal as we take a break.

Back with Evans charging into a knee in the corner and grabbing the Upside Down. A distraction lets Evans hammer away even more though and some choking from the floor makes it worse. The chinlock goes on but Rosemary is up almost immediately. Rosemary grabs a reverse DDT into a Sling Blade but Evans plants her with a spinebuster. A quick spear gets Rosemary out of trouble, only to have Vidal distract the referee. That’s enough for Shaw to get involved, allowing Evans to grab the full nelson slam for the pin at 12:08.

Rating: C. Not much to this one but they set up the title match for the pay per view. There still isn’t a ton of heat to the whole thing but the injury angle with Taya should be enough to carry them through. It’s still almost weird to see Rosemary losing though, as she was such a force around here for so long.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: Moose b. Rhino at Hard To Kill 2020.

Taylor Wilde is now a witch. The People’s Witch.

We look at Mickie James’ big losses, sending her into the Last Rodeo. Now she’s ready to win the Knockouts Title from Jordynne Grace, but Grace isn’t so sure.

Here is the Design to shave Sami Callihan’s hair, complete with the ring surrounded by lackeys. Deaner says this is the process so Callihan needs to take the first step. The lights go out and Callihan appears, with Deaner telling him to hand the baseball bat to Kon. Callihan hands it over, with Deaner comparing this to the story of Samson. Deaner keeps making sure Callihan is ok with this and we finally get to the haircut….until Callihan stops him.

Callihan finishes it himself and the fans aren’t happy. Deaner makes him look in a mirror so Callihan grabs the scissors. He hands them back to Deaner, who declares this the death of the Death Machine and the birth of Callihan. Odds are the big twist is coming later, but it’s still going to be the Design so it might not matter.

Gail Kim announces that due to Scott D’Amore being taken out by Bully Ray, a new authority figure will be named at Hard To Kill.

Mike Bailey vs. Anthony Greene

They start fast with Greene taking him into the corner but Bailey kicks him in the chest. Bailey knocks him to the floor and goes outside too, where he gets whipped into the steps for his efforts. Back in and Greene’s half crab sends Bailey to the ropes before Greene misses a charge to the floor. That lets Bailey hit the springboard moonsault, followed by the standing shooting star press for two back inside. A sitout powerbomb and superkick give Greene two each but Bailey blocks the running the ropes Unprettier. Bailey hits the spinning kick in the corner and the Ultimate Weapon finishes Greene at 6:49.

Rating: C+. Another nice showing from Greene here but Bailey seems like he is on the way to the main event scene very soon. It would surprise me if he isn’t the World Champion by the end of the year and that means racking up wins in spots like this one. Greene seems like he’ll be fine as a nice hand on the roster and that’s a fine place to be.

Video on Josh Alexander vs. Bully Ray.

Hard To Kill rundown.

Joe Hendry/Jonathan Gresham/Rich Swann vs. Steve Maclin/Eddie Edwards/Moose

Before the match, Hendry says Hard To Kill is on Friday the 13th, but being up against Dancing Moose and his backup dancers makes you believe in Hendry/Gresham/Swann. Gresham and Edwards start things off….at least officially as Edwards tags Maclin in without doing anything. Gresham dropkicks the knee out and it’s Hendry coming in to crank on the arm. A suplex gets one on Maclin and it’s off to Swann to pick up the pace.

Edwards comes in and gets caught with a running hurricanrana before it’s back to Gresham and Maclin. Everything breaks down in a hurry and the parade of strikes sends everyone to the floor as we take a break. Back with Swann in trouble, including Moose pulling his hair and stepping on his head. Maclin grabs the chinlock, with Swann not even being able to jawbreak his way to freedom. The villains take turns beating on Swann until he manages a few shots to Swann.

Another good shot is enough to bring Gresham back in for the house cleaning. Moose manages to grab Gresham though and tosses him into a Blue Thunder Bomb from Edwards. Gresham gets in a kick to Maclin though and the hot tag brings in Hendry to fall away slam Maclin for two. Everything breaks down again and a parade of non-finishers sets up Moose’s spear to Hendry for the pin at 16:11.

Rating: B-. This is exactly what it should have been as they hyped up three Hard To Kill matches at once here. Moose pinning Hendry is the most effective outcome too, as it adds a bit of drama to the title match. They had a fast paced match too, making this about as good of a use of the main event spot as it could be.

Post match Edwards is left alone in the ring….and thunder sounds as the lights flicker to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. As has been the case for more than a few weeks now, Impact checks every box on a show. This show covered or at least touched on every Hard To Kill match, which isn’t the easiest thing to do in a two hour show. They nailed this one pretty well with enough good action throughout. Nice work here and I want to see Hard To Kill, which is the entire point of a show like this one.

Results
Heath b. Brian Myers – Wake Up Call
Savannah Evans b. Rosemary – Full nelson slam
Mike Bailey b. Anthony Greene – Ultimate Weapon
Steve Maclin/Moose/Eddie Edwards b. Jonathan Gresham/Rich Swann/Joe Hendry – Spear to Hendry

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – January 5, 2023: One Of The Best Things Impact Has Done In Years

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 5, 2023
Location: Charles F. Dodge City Center, Pembroke Pines, Florida
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We’re back after last week’s Best Of 2022 event with the first show of 2023. That means we are just over a week away from Hard To Kill and the card is mostly set. There is always room for a little more effort though and now we might be getting to do just that. If nothing else, getting some of the lower card built up should help so let’s get to it.

In Memory Of Don West.

Opening recap.

Masha Slamovich vs. Taylor Wilde

Deonna Purrazzo is on commentary. Wilde is in all black and apparently has a new attitude, as seen on Before The Impact. Purrazzo doesn’t think much of Wilde’s resume, asking how long it has been since Wilde was a champion. Fair enough really, as it was a long time ago. They grapple to the mat to start with Slamovich spinning out of a wristlock into an armbar.

Wilde avoids a charge in the corner though and some choking has Slamovich in trouble. As Purrazzo complains about Hannifan talking about everything else coming tonight, Wilde sends Slamovich face first into the apron. That earns hear a northern lights suplex and a forearm to the face, followed by a suplex to send Wilde into the corner for two.

Back up and Wilde strikes away at the ropes, setting up a double clothesline (ignore Slamovich seemingly forgetting to stick her arm out until they had already collided). Wilde is back up with a Codebreaker but Slamovich pulls her throat first into the top rope. Slamovich stops to yell at Purrazzo though, allowing Wilde to grab a small package for the pin at 8:20.

Rating: C+. What in the world happened to Slamovich? She was the unstoppable monster for so many months and then just doesn’t stop losing. You would have thought she would get the Knockouts Title at some point in there, but now it would seem almost sad to see this version of her as champion. As for Wilde, it’s almost weird to see her getting a win like this, but if they are going to do something with her, it makes sense to start after that kind of a change.

Post match Slamovich beats up security.

Sami Callihan wants the Design but isn’t sure if they want him.

We look back at Rich Swann and Steve Maclin brawling last week.

Swann challenges Maclin for Hard To Kill with no DQ, no countouts and falls count anywhere. Be ready to fight all night long.

Black Taurus vs. Anthony Greene

Crazzy Steve introduces Taurus, promising that he will crush Greene (you may remember him as August Grey in NXT) with his hooves. Greene starts fast with a running hurricanrana so Taurus hits him rather hard in the corner. A powerslam gives Taurus two but Greene sends him outside. Greene clothesline Taurus down and declares himself the best thing in wrestling as we take a break.

Back with Greene hitting a dropkick to the back for two, followed by a springboard spinning crossbody. A suplex into a German suplex gives Greene two more but Taurus grabs some Sling Blades. Taurus hits a pop up Samoan drop and Destination Hellhole finishes Greene off at 9:07.

Rating: C. Taurus wasn’t going to lose on his way to a title match at Hard To Kill so the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt. Greene did well enough in his debut and will probably be part of the X-Division for awhile, but I’m not sure how far he is going to go. He never became the biggest star on 205 Live but maybe he’ll fit in better around here.

Post match Trey Miguel runs in to jump Taurus and gives him the spray paint treatment.

Kenny King invaded Mike Bailey’s dojo and beat up his students as Bailey wasn’t there (Impact LOVES the school invasion angle.).

Bailey is ticked and wants King in a Pit Fight (anything goes, fists taped, knockout or tap out).

Jonathan Gresham vs. Ernest R. Anthony

Gresham shakes his hand to start and they wrestle to the mat in a hurry. A dropkick sends Anthony into the corner but he comes back with a shot to the face. That earns Anthony an ankle crank before tying up the arm and twisting the ankle around again. With Anthony helpless, Gresham stacks him up for the pin at 3:40.

Rating: C. There is something special about watching Gresham pick someone apart and completely destroy them. The limb twisting and cranking can be great as Gresham makes it look so easy. I could go with watching him pick people apart around here too, and that seems to be what we’ll be getting for a good while to come.

Tasha Steelz yells at Savannah Evans about their recent losses. Gisele Shaw, with Jai Vidal, comes up to offer herself to the team. This doesn’t go well for Steelz, but Evans is interested.

The Design says if Sami Callihan wants to join, he has to start by recreating himself. Callihan can start next week by shaving his head, if he’s interested.

Video on Josh Alexander’s Impact Wrestling World Title, now the longest on record.

Here is Moose for a chat. He does bad things to people and at Hard To Kill, Joe Hendry is getting a taste of that. Moose has done anything he needed to get here, going from hero to villain, but now he knows what he is supposed to be. On Friday 13, he’s going to be Hendry’s first adversity and take the Digital Media Title while knocking the smile off his face. Moose takes the jacket off and wants the fight right now, so he says Hendry’s name.

Cue Hendry, who says there is nothing worse than a grumpy Moose. The real Moose is inside this one, so tonight let’s let the Moose loose. Hendry has a new song for Moose, including various mistakes and clips of Moose dancing as part of IPWF. The fans chant for Dancing Moose, which has Moose saying he believes….that he’ll beat Hendry up at Hard To Kill. Moose: “NOW PLAY MY D*** MUSIC!” I Believe In His Dancing plays again and Moose is furious. Hendry’s songs are always great and this was no exception.

Mickie James gives us a long look at her career, going from training to TNA (as part of the Gathering) to WWE. We hear about the Trish Stratus feud before she came back to TNA as Hardcore Country. Then she met Nick Aldis (Mickie: “I’m a lookin and I’m a likin! Then he spoke with a British accent and MIND BLOWN!”) and he became the love of his life, leading to the birth of their son.

She thought her career was over but then she went back to WWE. It was great but she wasn’t done. That brought her back to Impact Wrestling and she had one more great run. Now she wants to do it one more time and give the fans someone to believe in. This was REALLY good and one of the best things Impact has done in a long time, as it was all Mickie, who told her story very well. I really have no idea what happens with her title match and that’s a nice feeling.

And now the other side of fun, with a retrospective on Don West, who passed away last week from brain cancer. There are some really cool old school TNA clips here, with West’s voice blasting over them, which makes them feel all the more special.

Matt Cardona vs. Chris Sabin

Brian Myers and Alex Shelley are here too. Sabin spins out of a wristlock to start and an armdrag makes him complain about some bicep pain. Another armdrag into an armbar keeps Cardona in trouble until he sends Sabin outside. The dropkick through the ropes drops Sabin again and we take a break.

Back with Cardona whipping him hard into the corner, setting up the neck crank. That’s broken up and Sabin’s sunset flip gets two, only to have Cardona blast him down again. Sabin fights up and this the Tree of Woe dropkick but gets sent shoulder first into the post. The Reboot takes too long though and Sabin backdrops him to the floor as we take another break. Back again with Sabin’s tornado DDT getting….nothing as Myers distracts the referee.

Sabin takes out both Major Players with a suicide dive, followed by a high crossbody for two on Cardona. A distracted referee is enough for Cardona to get in a low blow and Sabin gets cut off again. There’s a suplex into the corner, with Cardona nailing back to back Reboots. The middle rope missile dropkick wakes Sabin up for some reason and he nails an enziguri. The Cradle Shock finishes or Sabin at 18:07.

Rating: B-. This got a lot more time than I would have expected and that was kind of nice for a change. Cardona is best known for his antics but he is more than capable of having a solid match against a variety of opponents. Then you have Sabin, who is one of the better hands that you can find in Impact’s history. Good stuff here and better than I was expecting (certainly longer at least).

Bully Ray (not supposed to be here this week) interrupts commentary’s preview of upcoming shows and demands a mic. Ray wants Josh Alexander (also not supposed to be here) right now but gets Scott D’Amore instead. D’Amore finds it interesting that Ray is willing to deal with Alexander now after no showing Alexander’s challenge a few weeks back. He cuts Ray off from the “you brought me back” speech and brings up Ray calling him for a job, saying he was a changed man.

D’Amore left this industry twelve years ago and didn’t like what he saw when he looked in the mirror. Then he came back five years ago and wanted to write a new story. The hope was that Ray could do the same, but look at what he is now. D-Von won’t be in the same room as Ray without getting a big bag of money and Ray’s only friend, Tommy Dreamer, is in the hospital. Alexander is coming back to a locker room that respects him and family that loves him. No matter what happens at Hard To Kill, Ray is going home alone.

Ray says that doesn’t leave him sad or pathetic, but rather a three time World Champion. They yell at each other a lot until D’Amore is ready to fight. D’Amore says he built up this locker room (Ray: “A locker room full of nobodies.”) and then nails Ray. Cue Ray’s lackeys to grab D’Amore though and it’s a low blow into a powerbomb through a table to leave D’Amore laying to end the show. Commentary being aghast doesn’t quite hold up when D’Amore hit him first, but we have to continue the BULLY RAY IS THE MOST EVIL MAN EVER story somehow.

Overall Rating: B-. There were some very good parts in here (the opener, the main event and that awesome Mickie James video), which are enough to outweigh some of the weaker stuff. I really don’t care for Bully Ray being in the main event/title picture, but they are doing the right things to make fans want to see Josh Alexander take him out and save the company. Hard To Kill is a two match show and those two matches have been set up very well.

Results
Taylor Wilde b. Masha Slamovich – Small package
Black Taurus b. Anthony Greene – Destination Hellhole
Jonathan Gresham b. Ernest R. Anthony – Arm and leg trap cradle
Chris Sabin b. Matt Cardona – Cradle Shock

 

 

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