Impact Wrestling – May 25, 2023: Siege Works

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 25, 2023
Location: Cicero Stadium, Cicero, Illinois
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s the go home show for Under Siege and the card is mostly set. There is still some tightening up that could be done for most of the show and that is where this week can come into play. Other than that, it might be time to start setting things up for the next big show after Under Siege so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Chris Sabin vs. Mike Bailey

Sabin blocks the kick to start but Bailey jumps over him, allowing Sabin to elbow him in the back. There’s the apron kick to the chest and Bailey is in trouble early. Back in and Sabin takes him down into a double underhook crank on the mat. That’s broken up and Bailey kicks him in the face to take over. More kicks put Sabin down and there’s the running shooting star press for two.

Sabin kicks the arm out and hits a missile dropkick but Bailey is back with more kicks. The standing moonsault knees to Sabin’s chest look to set up the tornado kick but Sabin kicks him back down. Back up and Bailey kicks him to the floor, setting up a kick to the head and a top rope Asai moonsault to drop Sabin again. Bailey kicks him in the head back inside but the Ultimate Weapon takes too long.

Instead Sabin sends him to the apron for a sunset bomb out to the floor (ouch). Back in and Sabin catches him on top again, this time with a release German superplex to send Bailey face first down. A heck of a clothesline sets up the Cradle Shock but Bailey reverses into a cradle for two. Bailey kicks him down hard for two more and now the tornado kick connects. The Ultimate Weapon doesn’t though and Sabin goes classic with a MuscleBuster. The Cradle Shock finishes Bailey at 12:25.

Rating: B+. This was another rather awesome X-Division opener and Bailey almost had me on that reverse of the Cradle Shock. These guys were trading one big move after another and they had a heck of a match as a result. Sabin can get in there against almost anyone and beating Bailey means a lot around here. This was rather awesome stuff and Bailey didn’t get get that annoying. I’m as shocked as you are, but great opener.

Video on Trinity debuting, feeling the love from the crowd, and accepting a match with Gisele Shaw at Under Siege.

Video on PCO vs. Steve Maclin.

Maclin says he has taken out PCO, so PCO won’t get a title shot at Under Siege. He’ll name his own replacement tonight.

Sheldon Jean/Kenny King vs. Decay

Nick Aldis is on commentary. Steve takes Jean down by the neck to start so Jean hands it off to King. That’s fine with Steve, who brings in the rather terrifying Taurus. We take a break and come back with Taurus knocking Jean down and kicking him in the face out of the corner. The reverse Sling Blade allows the tag back to Steve as everything breaks down. Taurus suplexes Steve onto King and then flip dives onto Jean. With Taurus on the floor, King Royal Flushes Steve for the pin at 10:24.

Rating: C. Perfectly fine match here though it never got into another level. This was about King looking better to get ready for his showdown with Aldis and the win gives him some momentum heading into the match. Other than that, Aldis being all chill on commentary sets a nice tone for him, but he’ll still need to find something to make him more interesting against King.

Post match King talks about Aldis, who says King can’t keep his name out of his mouth. Aldis knows King is trying to make a name for himself at Aldis’ expense, but the reality is that King needs to work his way up from being a little b****. Aldis takes his jacket off but has to deal with Jean, who comes after him on King’s orders. That’s enough to get Aldis in the ring, but King bails while singing his version of Annie’s Tomorrow.

Rosemary’s hourglass is almost out and Jessicka is panicking.

Jessicka vs. Taylor Wilde

KiLynn King is here with Wilde, who starts fast by knocking Jessicka down. A running basement DDT sets up a fisherman’s neckbreaker (the Witch’s Wrath) to finish Jessicka at 39 seconds.

Post match the beatdown is on and we see the hourglass running out. Cue a pair of red Chuck Taylor’s….and Courtney Rush (Rosemary before she was Rosemary) is here. Ruse comes in and cleans house, leaving the Coven to run off. Jessicka is thrilled to have Rush here and hugging ensues.

Post break Jessicka isn’t sure what the deal with Rush is, but Rush says she is kind of Rosemary but not really, as it’s kind of a possession sort of thing. Since she is here though, there is an adventure to go on, with Jessicka being invited along for the ride.

Angels vs. Rich Swann

The rest of the Design and Sami Callihan are here too. Swann bounces out of a wristlock to start and takes Angels down without much trouble. A hard kick drops Angels fast but he sends Swann to the floor, setting up a catapult into the post. Back in and a powerslam cuts Swann off again but he’s right back with some kicks to the face. A neckbreaker drops Angels again and there’s the step over kick to the face to make it worse.

Angels catches him on the middle rope and kicks the legs out to take over again. Swann ducks a kick to the head and scores with a dropkick, only to have a cartwheel moonsault hit raised knees. Angels sends him outside for a dive, followed by a frog splash for two back inside. That’s enough for Swann, who catches him on top and snaps off a hurricanrana. The middle rope 450 finishes for Swann at 6:56.

Rating: C+. Angels is pretty easily the best in-ring star of the Design but that isn’t exactly the hardest field to overcome. The war against Callihan continues, but there is only so much to get out of this story as it somehow keeps going. I’m almost scared to see who is going to team with Callihan and Swann tomorrow, but hopefully it isn’t someone with too much value being sunk into this thing.

Post match the Design comes in so Callihan tries to make the save. The baseball bat shots knock the good guys down.

Deonna Purrazzo isn’t worried about Jordynne Grace but Alisha Edwards comes in. Edwards talks about that Grace is going to show her true colors but Purrazzo isn’t convinced.

Killer Kelly and Masha Slamovich have a big brawl in the back. Slamovich chokes her out.

Alisha Edwards vs. Jordynne Grace

Eddie Edwards is here with Alisha. Grace gets shoved in the face to start and Alisha chops her, earning a laugh. Another slap is countered into Dalton Castle’s Bang A Rang, setting up the Grace Driver (Alisha landed HARD) for the pin at 46 seconds.

We get an explanation from Dirty Dango of why he attacked Santino Marella. Dango explains that he grew up watching the Attitude Era and he doesn’t like people walking around talking about how happy they are to be here. No he doesn’t have to worry about walking on eggshells because he makes money outside of wrestling. When he broke in, it was about talking in the locker room and what you did rather than looking at your phones.

People cared about the crowd reactions rather than their social media. No he isn’t worried about people hitting him in the face, but he might get a tweet. As for attacking Santino, it’s because the Cobra was a big deal in 2010 and Santino is stuck doing the same things over and over. Joe Hendry is just another stooge and it would be ironic and funny if Dango won the toy title. So he’s Jim Cornette’s complaints about modern wrestling?

Video on the six way #1 contenders match at Under Siege.

Chris Bey vs. John Skyler

Ace Austin, Brian Myers and Jason Hotch are ringside. Bey snaps off a hurricanrana to start and hits a double stomp to the back. Skyler is sent outside and ducks the dive, allowing his friends to offer a distraction. One heck of a clothesline takes Bey down and we take a break. Back with Skyler grabbing a chinlock but Bey is up in a hurry. The running elbow hits Skyler in the corner but a middle rope elbow misses for Bey. We get a series of standing switches as Hotch offers a distraction. With that not working, Bey dropkicks Myers down and the Art of Finesse finishes Skyler at 9:17.

Rating: C+. Another nice match between talented guys. The Good Hands have wound up being a perfectly nice team and a cool addition to the division. That being said, the Bullet Club has gone from just another team to maybe the best in the company today (yes including the Guns). I could go for those guys holding the titles for a long time, as this worked rather well, with skilled tag wrestlers getting to show their solo skills for a change.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Here is Steve Maclin to name his replacement World Title challenger for tomorrow night. Maclin declares PCO dead so here is his new opponent: Champagne Singh! Cue Singh, with Shera, to say it’s time he finished his story. He has a list of people to thank and it’s probably hundreds of names long. Instead here is Scott D’Amore to interrupt, with Singh saying we should get a contract out here right now.

D’Amore says nah on the match so Maclin yells about this being unfair. D’Amore says he wants the best wrestler in the world to be the World Champion and that might be Maclin. Then Maclin tries to do something like this and the title is disrespected. D’Amore wants to bury this right now. If Maclin retains at Under Siege, D’Amore will shake his hand and apology, even handing Maclin the title. That doesn’t work for the champ, who tells D’Amore to leave and show him the respect that he deserves.

The title makes Maclin D’Amore’s boss, and he wants D’Amore to strap the title around him if he wins at Under Siege. That works for D’Amore, but Maclin still wants to know the replacement. D’Amore hasn’t named a replacement, because THERE IS NO REPLACEMENT. Actually, he’s here tonight and cue PCO so the fight can be on. Maclin bails as the lackeys are beaten up to end the show. This was a long segment to set up the D’Amore stipulation and nothing else, as otherwise we’re right back where we started coming into this show.

Overall Rating: B-. Under Siege is looking good and this show helped boost it up even more. What mattered here was making me care about the big show a bit more and they accomplished their goal. The opener was good and the segments worked well enough, though the women’s matches not even breaking 90 seconds total was rather strange. As usual, the show knows what it needs to do and then goes out to do it, which is harder than it seems. Good show here, with the more important show hopefully following suit.

Results
Chris Sabin b. Mike Bailey – Cradle Shock
Kenny King/Sheldon Jean b. Decay – Royal Flush to Crazzy Steve
Taylor Wilde b. Jessicka – Witch’s Wrath
Rich Swann b. Alan Angels – Middle rope 450
Jordynne Grace b. Alisha Edwards – Grace Driver
Chris Bey b. John Skyler – Art Of Finesse

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – May 18, 2023: When Things Come Together

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 18, 2023
Location: Cicero Stadium, Cicero, Illinois
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We’re almost up to Under Siege and things have started to get all the more interesting around here. Above all else, Steve Maclin has to defend the World Title against PCO, but might also have Alex Shelley to worry about either before or after. Other than that, Trinity has an open challenge for the show and is going to need an opponent. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Trey Miguel vs. Laredo Kid

Non-title. Kid takes him down without much effort to start but they’re right up with a standoff. Back up and Kid sends him outside for the big running dive as Miguel can’t get much going here. Miguel finally uppercuts his way out of trouble and hits a basement dropkick for two back inside. Some slow kicks to the head seem to wake Kid up, meaning it’s a Michinoku Driver into a not so great looking bottom rope moonsault.

The middle rope moonsault to the back gets two but Miguel kicks him away again. A running flip DDT plants Miguel again though and something like a reverse Koji clutch keeps him down. With that broken up, Miguel flips over him and hits a basement dropkick to the back of the head for two more. A loud enziguri sets up a missed Lightning Spiral, only to have Miguel pull off the mask. That’s enough for a rollup with tights to give Miguel the pin at 8:54.

Rating: B-. This was what you would expect from these two as Miguel is one of the more dependable stars in Impact these days and Kid has always been worth a look. That being said, I really could go without seeing the “HE RIPPED OFF THE MASK” for a very long time. It comes off like the emergency exit for a match involving a masked wrestler these days and just feels uncreative.

Post match Miguel insults the crowd and says it’s time to get some respect on his name. Actually, Miguel wants it so much that he is holding this show hostage until he gets his respect. We take a break and come back with Miguel still in the ring until Chris Sabin, the #1 contender to Miguel’s X-Division Title, interrupts. Sabin talks about how Miguel needs to give respect to get it back, and he didn’t give any respect when he defaced the title.

It was disrespectful to everyone who who has held that title before. Sabin is an eight time X-Division Champion and a former World Champion, so at Under Siege, he is taking the title and giving it the respect that it deserves. Now get out of his ring, which Miguel does. This made the title match feel that might more important and that is a great thing, as the X-Division Title rarely gets this much attention.

Trinity is warming up when Jai Vidal interrupts. Gisele Shaw isn’t happy with her, but Trinity says come do something about it face to face. Shaw is injured but will be back next week, where Trinity will be waiting.

Rich Swann and Sami Callihan talk about their history together. They started at a small independent promotion in Philadelphia and became friends. Sure they fight from time to time, but people as close as they are will always come back together. We see some of their fights over the years and Sami says he’ll still call Swann the best wrestler in the world.

Ace Austin vs. Jason Hotch

Chris Bey is here with Austin and Brian Myers/John Skyler are here with Hotch. Before the match, Myers and Skyler threaten Austin for going after one of the Good Hands. They go technical to start with Hotch working on a headlock before running Austin over. That doesn’t seem to bother Austin, who rolls out and kicks him in the back.

A hip toss and armdrag have Hotch in trouble, setting up a jumping legdrop for two. Austin grabs a headscissors, sending Hotch over to the ropes rather quickly. Back up and Hotch sends him throat first into the rope to take over and we take a break. We come back with Austin hitting a running forearm in the corner, only to get caught with a Blue Thunder Bomb for two.

Austin fights up again and looks to set up the Fold but Myers’ distraction lets Skyler pull him to the floor. Bey takes Skyler down but Hotch catches Austin with a Spanish Fly for two. Back up and Myers gets in a cheap shot from the floor, allowing Hotch to grab a rollup for the pin at 11:32.

Rating: B-. Hotch is someone who you haven’t seen much from around here but he actually does live up to the Good Hand moniker. The Hands should be fine enough for an upcoming title shot as Myers is just enough of a threat to make you think that the titles could change hands. Another good match here, as this show is doing rather well so far.

Steve Maclin thanks Champagne Singh and Shera for taking out Heath last week. He needs them to prove their worth again though and it is time to do it right now. Come with him.

We look back at the Coven retaining the Knockouts Tag Team Titles over Jordynne Grace and Deonna Purrazzo last week.

Grace wants to be the face of this division so she wants no doubt when she beats Purrazzo. Alisha Edwards comes in to say she doesn’t believe anything Grace is saying. Grace took Purrazzo out last week on purpose…but the threat of a right hand sends Edwards bailing.

Trinity vs. KiLynn King

Taylor Wilde is here with King. An early kick to the face staggers King and the threat of the Rear View sends her to the apron. Back in and a kick to the head rocks King, setting up the splits splash for two. King finally fights back and ties her in the ropes, setting up a kick of her own to rock Trinity for a change. A backslide attempt doesn’t work for Trinity and King blasts her with a clothesline for two.

King slowly hammers away and hits a high collar suplex, followed by alternating rope choking. Trinity fights back up but gets crotched n top by Wilde, which is enough for an ejection (not a DQ, but an ejection). A high crossbody hits King and a good looking top rope Blockbuster gives Trinity two more.

King is right back with a powerslam for two of her own but Trinity sends her into the ropes. Something like a jumping hanging Pedigree (minus the double underhook) gives Trinity two but King grabs an AA for the same. Trinity knees her in the face though and pulls King into Star Struck (the reverse Rings of Saturn) for the tap at 10:31.

Rating: B. This was a lot of trading moves but they were rocking by the end and while there was almost no way that Trinity was losing, the near falls had me wondering how this was going to end. They did a great job of pulling me in here and the fans seemed rather invested. If nothing else, it showed that Trinity can still go after such a long time away from the ring, which is exactly how you need to get things started. Very good stuff here and they were working hard throughout,.

Post match Jai Vidal interrupts and says everyone knows who Gisele Shaw is. Shaw has a message for her: she accepts the challenge for Under Siege and Vidal goes to slap her. That’s broken up with a twist of the hand and a kick to the head, with Trinity accepting the acceptance.

Steve Maclin, Champagne Singh and Shera jump PCO and beat him down backstage. They put some cement blocks on his back and crush it with a sledgehammer, leaving PCO screaming.

Jessicka is waiting on Rosemary to get back from the Undead Realm when the Coven interrupts. They offer to open the door to the Realm but Rosemary has said they aren’t powerful enough. King (who looks fine after a hard hitting match that absolutely took place right before this took place) says Rosemary isn’t always right and the Coven seems ready to open the door.

Jody Threat vs. Sierra

Threat kicks her into the corner to start and fires off some clotheslines. The release northern lights suplex drops Sierra again and a top rope seated senton makes it worse. Threat grabs a German suplex and finishes with the F416 finishes Sierra at 2:25. They’re certainly trying with Threat so points for pushing someone new.

Eddie Edwards comes up to see Frankie Kazarian before their six man tag. Edwards says follow his lead tonight, with Kazarian agreeing, though he hopes it goes better than Honor No More.

Dirty Dango clears Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice of attacking Santino Marella because they’re too stupid to figure it out. They accuse Joe Hendry, who pops in, with Dango asking if that’s true. Hendry denies it, but says he’s a champion and therefore moving on from all of this. Dango doesn’t like that and gets his shirt ripped open, revealing MISSING CHEST HAIR! Dango tries to deny it….but yeah he did it. Dango: “Case closed bro.”

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Frankie Kazarian/Moose/Eddie Edwards vs. Yuya Uemura/Jonathan Gresham/Alex Shelley

This is everyone in the Under Siege #1 contenders match. Shelley cranks on Eddie’s arm to start before it’s quickly off to Uemura vs. Moose. Uemura armdrags him into an armbar before it’s off to Kazarian to headlock Gresham. Edwards comes back in to headbutt Gresham, only to have Shelley come in off a blind tag to take out the leg. Everything breaks down and Shelley and company clear the ring as we take a break.

Back with Uemura suplexing Eddie and getting over for the tag to Shelley. Shelley comes in to start taking over on Eddie, who enziguris his way out of trouble. Kazarian hits a leg lariat for two on Shelley and hands it back to Moose, who isn’t happy with this. The slow, alternating beatings continue until Shelley goes after Eddie’s bad knee. The Boston Knee Party gets Eddie out of trouble but Shelley knocks him down again, allowing Uemura to come in and clean house.

A suplex gets two on Eddie but he’s right back with the Blue Thunder Bomb for the same. Moose cuts Uemura off with a Randy Orton backbreaker, followed by a standing powerbomb for two. Uemura kicks his way out of trouble though and brings Gresham back in. Moose’s powerbomb is broken up and Gresham rolls him into a failed ankle lock attempt. Gresham cranks the leg out anyway and victory rolls the now legal Kazarian for two.

Shelley comes back in and gets clotheslined, followed by the running forearm. The slingshot DDT gives Kazarian two but Shelley drops Kazarian and Edwards at the same time. Kazarian Backstabs Uemura but gets suplexed hard by Gresham. Uemura dives onto Moose at ringside and we settle down to Shelley Shell Shocking Edwards for the pin at 20:21.

Rating: B. The solid wrestling show wraps up with a solid six man as Shelley gets some momentum built up for Under Siege. This was a bunch of stuff that kept going until the end with Eddie’s knee injury being the main focal point. Other than that, it was a great way to get a bunch of people some shine at the same time, while being unique enough that it felt worth seeing.

Overall Rating: B+. This is the kind of show that you do not get very often and it was a very special watch. It was two hours of awesome wrestling and storylines being advanced. I had a really good time with this show and there was nothing bad throughout. They even had a lack of Design for a bonus. Rather great show here and one of the best Impacts in a long time.

Results
Trey Miguel b. Laredo Kid – Rollup with tights
Jason Hotch b. Ace Austin – Rollup
Trinity b. KiLynn King – Starstruck
Joey Threat b. Sierra – F416
Yuya Uemura/Jonathan Gresham/Alex Shelley b. Frankie Kazarian/Moose/Eddie Edwards – Shell Shock to Edwards

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – May 11, 2023: The Way I Like My Impact

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 11, 2023
Location: Cicero Stadium, Cicero, Illinois
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are inching closer to Under Siege and the World Title situation is looking interesting. PCO is scheduled to challenge Steve Maclin for the title and that is not exactly sitting well with the champ. Other than that, we have some matches rapidly being set, with Trinity possibly being added to the card. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Masha Slamovich vs. Killer Kelly

Kelly crawls around to start and rolls a kicking Slamovich up for two. Back up and Kelly knocks her to the floor without much trouble, setting up the running kick to the chest. Some clotheslines drop Slamovich again, followed by a delayed release fisherman’s suplex for two. Slamovich runs her over and rips at Kelly’s face for a bit.

We hit the reverse chinlock but Kelly powers up and sends her into the corner for the break. Some Al Snow trapping headbutts set up a suplex into the corner, followed by a German suplex for two. Slamovich kicks her in the ribs for her own two, setting up a sunset driver for another near fall. Kelly shrugs it off and hits a Death Valley Driver, setting up the Killer Klutch. Slamovich is up with a rope walk and flips back onto Kelly for the pin at 8:42.

Rating: C+. Good stuff here, as Kelly continues to impress. Slamovich needed the win more here though, as she has fallen mostly through the floor in recent months. The talent is there, but at some point you have to win something. The same is true for Kelly, though she has never had the big opportunities that Slamovich has already earned. Nice opener here, and a change of pace from the usual fast paced starts to the show.

Kenny King gives Sheldon Jean a pep talk before his match.

We look back at Trinity’s debut last week.

Trinity wants the Knockouts Title and has an open contract for Under Siege. Jai Vidal comes in and grabs a quick photo, much to Trinity’s confusion.

Nick Aldis vs. Sheldon Jean

Kenny King is on commentary. Aldis headlocks him down a few times but it’s too early for the King’s Lynn Cloverleaf. They head outside with King offering a distraction so Jean can get in a cheap shot to take over. Back in and a side kick gives Jean two but Aldis fights up without much trouble. A Michinoku Driver gets two on Jean but he catches Aldis on top. With that broken up, Aldis drops the top rope elbow and the King’s Lynn Cloverleaf is good for the tap at 3:30.

Rating: C. Jean is decent enough to be one of the new designated jobbers whose name we know, though that might not have the longest shelf life. This was of course all about Aldis though, who looked fine in his return. That being said, at some point he is going to have to show that he can be more interesting and that has been an issue for him for years.

Dirty Dango and Joe Hendry are talking about who attacked Santino Marella when Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in. Hendry and the two goons accuse each other, setting up Swinger vs. Dango. Well, after they call Santino to make it official. With the villains gone, Dango invites Hendry to his birthday party, where Hendry would be the only guest. Ok then.

We get part three of the Frankie Kazarian interviews, this time talking about his return and quest to become World Champion. Last year he won the X-Division Title again and used Option C but came up short again, though the World Title is still a goal. We talk about the various things he has done, many of which had nothing to do with the title. He is willing to fight anyone around, and now he’s the veteran, which is a spot that he loves to have. This really didn’t tell us much, but getting to know wrestlers a bit more like this is a great idea and that has been the case here.

Decay vs. Good Hands

The Hands introduce themselves and mock the Chicago Cubs like good villains should. Skyler and Steve start things off, with Steve taking him down for a neck crank. Taurus comes in for a modified What’s Up, followed by the running hurricanrana. Steve’s monkey flip is broken up though and a cheap shot (Tom: “Steve was blindsided!” The guy is legally blind so that’s not nice.) lets Hotch take him down again.

Steve’s double finger bite doesn’t work and it’s a belly to back suplex to cut him off. Steve Downward Spirals his way out of trouble, allowing the hot tag to Taurus. With Brian Myers coming out to watch, Taurus cleans house and everything breaks down. Steve dives onto Skyler but gets dropped by Myers. A Stunner over the ropes staggers Taurus into a middle rope G9 (Samoan drop/Blockbuster combination) for the pin at 5:09.

Rating: C+. Kind of a slow match but Myers hooking up with the Good Hands is a better move than having them work for Bully Ray, so they did something smart. Decay losing is a little weird, but it’s a fine enough way to establish the new unit. The Good Hands are, well, good hands, so there should be a place for them for awhile.

Post match Myers poses with the Good Hands.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Sarita/Taylor Wilde b. Beautiful People to win the Knockouts Tag Team Titles.

Steve Maclin is sick of Champagne Singh and Shera screwing up so he fires both of them. Singh and Shera have an idea.

Post break, Singh and Shera jump Heath.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Rhino vs. Steve Maclin

Maclin is defending and we get the Big Match Intros for a nice touch. They hit the stall button for a bit to start before trading arm control. Rhino powers him into the corner and Maclin has to stop for a breather. Some chops into a hiptoss look to set up the Gore but Maclin bails to the floor. That’s fine with Rhino, who crotches him on the barricade, only for a Stunner over the top to cut Rhino off.

Back in and Maclin goes after the leg, with some rams into the apron to make it worse. The middle rope headbutt misses for Maclin though and the slugout is on. Maclin is taken up top for a superplex and a near fall, leaving both of them down. Another Gore is loaded up but Maclin cuts out the leg again in a smart move. Maclin hits his own Gore for the pin to retain at 9:00.

Rating: C+. It was a bit of a slow match but Maclin gets a nice defense under his belt before he has to move on to PCO. Working on the leg was a good enough way to keep the match going and Maclin using the Gore was an even better touch. Maclin might not be the most interesting champion, but he had a perfectly fine title defense here.

Post match Maclin goes after the knee again and takes it out with a chair. Maclin isn’t done though as he wraps the chair around the leg and smashes it with a shovel. That’s FINALLY enough to draw out referees to break it up.

During the break, Rhino was taken out on a stretcher and into an ambulance, with Scott D’Amore there to watch. Maclin pops up and gets in a shouting match with D’Amore, who makes the Under Siege match against PCO No DQ. PCO appeared for the brawl and Maclin ran off.

Here is Joe Hendry for a chat. He was talking to Michael Jordan, who gave him some advice, but Hendry is the expert on wrestling. Hendry is here to hear them say WE BELIEVE and then introduces Dirty Dango.

Dirty Dango vs. Johnny Swinger

Joe Hendry and Zicky Dice are here too. Dango slugs away to start but gets choked on the rope for his efforts. Swinger stops to strut though, allowing Dango to block a stomp to the chest. A Falcon Arrow finishes Swinger at 1:16.

The Design is still mad at Sami Callihan and promises more suffering. The Army Of Violence comes in but Sami is there in disguise and chaos ensues. Much like this horrible story.

Moose isn’t sure what Brian Myers is up to with the Good Hands but doesn’t seem to like the idea. With Moose gone, Myers says he wants the Hands to become a team, so he’ll mold them into champions.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: Deonna Purrazzo/Jordynne Grace vs. The Coven

The Coven is defending. Purrazzo and King trade waistlocks to start before Purrazzo’s running hurricanrana takes her down. An armdrag into an armbar has King down and it’s off to Grace for a double hiptoss. An assisted moonsault gets two on King but Grace gets sent into the corner for an elbow to the face.

Grace elbows her way out of trouble but the Grace Driver is blocked. The Vader Bomb connects instead and we take a break with King in trouble. Back with Purrazzo kicking and dodging her way out of the corner, only to get dropped hard onto the apron. The slow beating continues, with Wilde choking in the corner and on the rope. Purrazzo fights out of the front facelock and kicks her way to freedom, allowing the hot tag off to Grace.

House is quickly cleaned until we settle down to Grace jumping over Wilde in the corner. Grace catches her in the corner and hits a MuscleBuster for two, with King making the save. Everything breaks down again and Grace is sent into Purrazzo by mistake, allowing Wilde to get two. With Purrazzo down, a Hart Attack (pump kick instead of clothesline) finishes Grace to retain at 14:29.

Rating: B-. The extra time helped here and the Coven continues to grow into a more respectable team. They already feel like the best team in Impact but given the rather shallow competition, that still leaves them with a lot to cover. For now though, beating two singles stars and keeping the Knockouts Title feud going is a good use of fifteen minutes in the main event.

Post match the Coven goes after Grace but Trinity runs in for the save. A lot of posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was the Impact that I like: they had a bunch of stuff they wanted to cover and then did just that. It’s very nice to see them have an efficiently run show like this one which had enough good wrestling to keep me invested and nothing bad to hold it down. Nice work this week, and that is always good to see.

Results
Masha Slamovich b. Killer Kelly – Rollup
Nick Aldis b. Sheldon Jean – King’s Lynn Cloverleaf
Good Hands b. Decay – Samoan drop/middle rope Blockbuster combination to Taurus
Steve Maclin b. Rhino – Gore
Dirty Dango b. Johnny Swinger – Falcon Arrow
The Coven b. Jordynne Grace/Deonna Purrazzo – Pump kick/spinebuster combination to Grace

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – May 4, 2023: Here She Is

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 4, 2023
Location: Cicero Stadium, Cicero, Illinois
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

The road to under Siege continues and we should be in for a fun ride on the way there. With the main event already set up, there are still some spots that need to be filled in and some of those are likely to be covered this week. That should make for an interesting and important show so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

BREAKING NEWS: Trinity (formerly known as Naomi) has signed with Impact Wrestling and will be here with a live mic tonight.

Bhupinder Gujjar/Yuya Uemura vs. Brian Myers/Moose

Gujjar takes over on Myers to start and sends him into the corner. Uemura comes in to take Myers down and a knee drop gets two. It’s off to Moose, who gets knocked outside with Myers being sent into him. Gujjar and Uemura hit stereo dives to the floor to take them both down, followed by a middle rope bulldog to drop Moose back inside.

Moose powers him down and hands it back to Myers. The Roster Cut is countered into a belly to belly though and the double tag brings in Gujjar to plant Moose for two. The Gargoyle Spear misses but so does Moose’s spear. Gujjar hits a Sling Blade for two with Myers making the save. The spear gives Moose the pin on Gujjar at 6:47.

Rating: C+. Moose and Myers are actually turning into a nice heel team and I would not have bet on that being the case. Neither of them have much else to do so putting them together is a fine enough way to go. Gujjar continues to feel like a star in the making and Uemura is as solid of an up and coming hand as they have around here. Nice opener and better than I was expecting.

Steve Maclin/Champagne Singh/Shera are ready for whomever is dumb enough to team with PCO. Singh gives the interviewer money as she leaves (she seems surprised).

Dirty Dango is trying to figure out who attacked Santino Marella (he has a chart with strings attacking pictures, including who looks to be Tony Chimmel, Vladimir Kozlov and Tyler Breeze among several others). Dango summons Joe Hendry, who has a magnifying glass and asks about the hair Dango found at the crime scene last week. Worry not because Dango lost it (the 16 energy drinks in 36 hours might have caused the problem). Dango has a prim suspect though: Mike Tenay. Hendry thinks it might have been Trey Miguel, who doesn’t like Santino. A hug ensues.

Sami Callihan vs. Deaner

The rest of the Design is here with Deaner, who says Sami made a huge mistake by hitting him in the face with the baseball bat (which Sami has here). The fans think Deaner deserved it, which he says is giving Sami a false sense of hope. We’ll change things up instead.

Sami Callihan vs. Kon

The chokeslam plants Callihan and Angels stomps away behind the referee’s back until we get the opening bell. Sami quickly fights back and sends Kon the floor, where Kon trips him down to take back over. Kon runs him over and we take a break. Back with Kon dropping a knee for two and grabbing a bearhug. Callihan fights out and takes over but has to take out Angels. Deaner gets up on the apron with the baseball bat and gives Callihan the thumbs down, allowing the army of violence (the guys in yellow hoodies) to jump Callihan for the DQ at 10:21.

Rating: C-. Yeah I knew this feud wasn’t going to be over yet because I’m not that lucky. I still have no idea what is seen in either the Design of this feud in general but it has been going on for months now with no real end in sight. I’m sure Sami will have to go through all of them one by one before getting to face Deaner in what will be the most thrilling fight ever. Just get away from this stuff already and move on entirely.

Post match Deaner stares at Sami, who calls him a b****. The baseball bat to the face knocks Sami out.

Trey Miguel isn’t happy with being accused of attacking Santino Marella and thinks Dirty Dango had something to do with it. Joe Hendry wants to check Trey’s hair but finds nothing, leaving a confused Miguel to talk away.

Nick Aldis wants the World Title and he’s willing to work to get there. He doesn’t just get handed a title shot around here because the title is more valuable than that. Kenny King comes in to ask if Aldis is on the fast track or the easy train. Aldis thinks King is acting like a gatekeeper so Aldis will knock on that gate on his way to proving a point. King says he isn’t Scott D’Amore but seems interested.

Alisha Edwards vs. Jody Threat

Threat hits her in the face to start and hits some corner clotheslines. Threat misses a charge into the ropes but is right back with a German suplex. The F416 finishes Edwards at 2:56. That’s quite the defeat for someone who was being pushed a bit with Eddie Edwards.

The Motor City Machine Guns are excited that Chris Sabin will be getting an X-Division Title shot at Under Siege. They’ll always be a team but they can be successful on their own as well. Sabin is cool with getting a title shot at Under Siege (Sabin: “Which must be named after my second favorite Steven Segal movie.” Shelly: “What’s your first?” Sabin: “Under Siege II.” Shelley has to cover his face off that one.). With Sabin going after the X-Division Title, Shelly is going to go win the World Title.

We get the second part in the series of sitdown interviews with Frankie Kazarian, who talks about what he did when he left Impact in 2014. He went to Ring Of Honor and had to prove himself again, which was fine with him. Then he went to what would become AEW, but after having some success there as a team, it was time to prove himself back where he started, but on his own. He bet on himself and his future is here. These have been good and this worked too.

Steve Maclin/Champagne Singh/Shera vs. PCO/???/???

PCO is ready to go it alone but here are Heath and Rhino to say they’ll be the partners. Singh tags himself in to save Maclin from having to face PCO, earning a stomping in the corner. Rhino comes in and actually gets punched into the corner, only to chop his way to freedom. It’s off to Heath, who gets sent into the corner by Shera to take over.

Maclin comes in to stomp away but walks into a powerslam. That’s enough for a double tag to bring in PCO to beat up Singh, including a running flip dive through the ropes. Everything breaks down and Rhino Gores Maclin, leaving Heath to Wake Up Call Singh. The PCOsault finishes at 6:57.

Rating: C+. Nice match here and Singh played his role of designated loser rather well. Heath and Rhino are a good choice to put in here as the fans like them and they work well together as a team. Stringing out Maclin vs. PCO is a good idea, as Maclin can be scared of him until the title match and then escape with a win. This was a perfectly fine use of about ten minutes and that’s always nice to see.

The Coven is using magic on Deonna Purrazzo and Jordynne Grace.

The Death Dollz summon James Mitchell, who says the Coven isn’t powerful enough to block their access to the Undead Realm. He’ll fix it but won’t say what it costs. Rosemary, cleaver in hand, gives Jessicka an hourglass, saying they’ll be back before the sand runs out.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Mike Bailey

They shake hands to start but there seems to be some tension. Both catch the other’s kick before Gresham grabs a headscissors on the mat to take over. That’s broken up and they grapple against the ropes as we take a break. Back with Gresham kicking him in the face before snapping off an armdrag on what seems to be a banged up arm.

They go to a test of strength with Gresham getting him to the mat and cranking away on the hands. Bailey’s legs are fine enough to kick away but misses the big one to the head. Bailey goes for the arm as well before hitting the moonsault knees. The rapid fire kicks to the chest rock Gresham to send him outside, setting up the moonsault to the floor.

We take another break and come back again with Bailey kneeing him down for two. Gresham starts back in on the arm but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. They trade forearms until Bailey scores with the tornado kick. The Ultimate Weapon misses and Gresham slaps on the Octopus for the tap at 13:24.

Rating: B. Commentary kept hyping up how good these matches have been and yeah they’re not wrong. There is a chemistry that works here and it is amazing how much better a Bailey match can be when he doesn’t spend half of it not selling a leg injury. Gresham taking him down and getting him into the Octopus for the win worked, though I could go with not seeing these two together again for a bit.

Rich Swann comes up to Sami Callihan in the back, which doesn’t have Sami happy. Sami gets to the point: is Swann going to help him or not?

Steve Maclin complains to Scott D’Amore about Rhino, so he can defend the title against Rhino next week.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Here is Trinity (formerly Naomi, not the Trinity from the old TNA days) for a debut chat and the fans seem happy to see her. She’s glad to be back and is happy to be in Impact, where she can glow. The reason she chose Impact is the most storied women’s division in wrestling and she wants a piece of it. She’s hear to make an impact and wants the Knockouts Title.

Cue Deonna Purrazzo, who says Trinity invoked her. She knows what it is like to be in a new place, so if Trinity wants a title shot, it isn’t something she can just walk out on. Trinity says facing her will make Purrazzo wish she got fired. Cue Jordynne Grace to say everyone wants to see the two of them fight, but she has the next title shot. Grace and Purrazzo argue but Trinity says she’s waiting on the winner. Trinity leaves them to stare each other down to end the show.

It was a good way to debut, but they treated Trinity like this huge arrival and….she’s just not that big of a star. She’s certainly a name, but this isn’t Becky Lynch showing up. That is one of the good signs for the Knockouts division: it has the depth and history that this isn’t the single most important moment that has ever happened. It’s still a cool moment though, if nothing else because of how she left WWE.

Overall Rating: B-. Another solid show here as they did their thing and started boosting up Under Siege. I’m curious to see where a lot of these stories are going and that makes for a good sign, as things are interesting enough that I want to keep watching. Considering Under Siege is a lower level show, Impact seems to be on something of a roll and the Trinity debut should be a nice boost that will get some extra attention. Good show this week, which is a long running trend.

Results
Moose/Brian Myers b. Bhupinder Gujjar/Yuya Uemura – Spear to Gujjar
Sami Callihan b. Kon via DQ when the Army of Violence interfered
Jody Threat b. Alisha Edwards – F416
PCO/Heath/Rhino b. Steve Maclin/Champagne Singh/Shera – PCOsault to Singh
Jonathan Gresham b. Mike Bailey – Octopus

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 20, 2023: Dang This Stuff Works

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 20, 2023
Location: Rebel Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We are done with Rebellion and the biggest story is the new World Champion, having defeated Kushida to win the vacant title. At the same time, Deonna Purrazzo is once again Knockouts Champion, having defeated Jordynne Grace for the vacant title in the show’s main event. Let’s get to it.

Here is Rebellion if you need a recap.

We look at the new champions being crowned at Rebellion.

Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham/Trey Miguel vs. Time Machine

Gresham and Shelley go technical to start for a standoff so it’s off to Bailey vs. Sabin. An armbar has Bailey in trouble as commentary points out that everyone but Miguel lost at Rebellion. Kushida comes in and gets sent into the corner, where Miguel rakes his back. That doesn’t last long as Kushida gets over to his own corner, allowing all of Time Machine to crank on Miguel’s arm.

It’s off to Bailey, who gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a triple dropkick as the dominance continues. Shelley starts in on Bailey’s arm before it’s back to Kushida, who kicks Gresham and Miguel off the apron in a smart move. Everything breaks down and Sabin hits a suicide dive onto Gresham and Miguel as we take a break.

Back with Bailey’s arm still in trouble but he kicks his way to freedom. Gresham comes in and gets to face Kushida with Gresham getting a series of near falls. Sabin accidentally kicks Shelley in the chest though and it’s Miguel getting to clean house. Bailey busts out the slingshot springboard moonsault onto the pile on the floor but Kushida Hoverboard Locks Miguel. Time Machine all get submission holds on at once and we take another break.

Back again with Miguel knocking Kushida into the corner. That doesn’t last long as it’s back to Sabin, who gets to slug it out with Shelley. Bailey kicks him down and this the moonsault double knees to the chest. Sabin is back up with a German superplex and Shelley/Kushida break up the tag attempts. Bailey manages the Ultimate Weapon to a standing Sabin’s back as everything breaks down. The parade of strikes to the face leads to Kushida kicking Miguel in the face, setting up Cradle Shock for the pin at 26:35.

Rating: B. Like this wasn’t going to work. They had all six guys getting time and Bailey getting beaten up. What else could you want in a match? The ending even sets up Sabin (though Kushida and Shelley could be right there too) as Miguel’s next challenger, which boosts up the competition a good bit. Very solid opener here as they let six talented people have a long, long TV match and it worked.

Santino Marella is happy with his in-ring return but says he won’t be returning to the ring very often. Alisha Edwards interrupts to to yell about PCO but Santino sends her to the ring for her match. Gia Miller: “Did she have a match tonight?” Santino: “She does now.” Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in to ask about Swinger’s match but Santino says he can’t keep wasting resources on a loser. Dice has found the world’s greatest luchador though, and he’ll even pay for said luchador’s appearance and transportation. Even Santino is down with that.

Video on Deonna Purrazzo, the new Knockouts Champion.

Alisha Edwards vs. Tara Rysing

Alisha takes Tara into the corner to start and sends her flying without much effort. Tara manages a clothesline out of the corner but gets sent outside. Back in and an X Factor finishes Rysing at 2:27.

Post match Edwards stays on Tara but Jody Threat makes the save.

Post break Threat promises to take care of Edwards for Rysing.

Moose vs. Yuya Uemura

Brian Myers and Bhupinder Gujjar are here too. Moose takes him straight into the corner to start but gets pulled into an armbar. With Moose on the floor, Uemura loads up a dive but Myers takes the impact for him. That earns Uemura an apron bomb and Moose shoves him around back inside. Uemura fights up but Myers offers a distraction, allowing Moose to knock him back down.

Back in and Uemura hits a dropkick, followed by a middle rope bulldog for two. Moose suplexes his way out of a suplex but gets caught in a German suplex. Uemura’s high crossbody is broken up so Moose goes up, only to get belly to back superplexed down. Now the high crossbody can connect but Myers offers the distraction. Gujjar goes after him but Moose sends Umeura throat first into the top rope. The spear finishes Uemura at 9:57.

Rating: C+. Power vs. speed with interference mixed in worked well enough here and Uemura is feeling more and more like a player every week. He’s no longer just the guy on excursion but rather someone who might be something around here. Granted that isn’t going to have the longest future, but for now I can settle for a young, talented star giving Moose a nice match.

Nick Aldis is happy to be back and tells us some of his history around here. He’s coming for Steve Maclin and the World Title because he knows what it’s like to be under that pressure. As soon as Maclin’s strong legs start to wobble, Aldis will be right there to take the title from him. As usual, Aldis cuts a good promo, but he’s only so interesting.

Frankie Kazarian vs. Good Hands

Kazarian slugs away to start but gets caught in the wrong corner rather quickly. A dropkick puts both Hands down at once but Skyler low bridges Kazarian to the floor. Back in and Kazarian takes over without much trouble, setting up a Figure Four and small package for two at the same time. The slingshot cutter hits Hotch and the chickenwing finishes Skyler at 3:40.

Rating: C. Just a showcase for Kazarian here, which wasn’t the most thrilling stuff but it wasn’t supposed to be. Kazarian getting a push is a fine way to go as he would be a good choice for a one off World Title shot at Maclin. You aren’t likely to get anything worse than pretty good out of him so warming him up like this could be a rather smart move.

The Coven is coming for Deonna Purrazzo.

Sami Callihan talks about how smart he is and claims to have infiltrated the Design to take them down from within. Was that really supposed to be a surprise?

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Sheldon Jean

Hendry is defending and brings up Jean being on Big Brother Canada but having his season cut off by the Coronavirus pandemic. Jean shrugs off an early beatdown and hammers Hendry down on the mat for a bit of a surprise. That’s enough for Hendry, who fights up with some clotheslines. The fall away slam sets up…actually a strike off until Jean gets dropped. The Standing Ovation retains the title at 4:33.

Rating: C. This was a little longer than I expected and Jean got in a nice bit of offense so it might have been a tryout for him. Hendry got to break the smallest bit of a sweat to retain, but the real perk here was the energy that he brings. The motivational stuff is great and I could see Hendry going pretty far around here, as the fans are into him and that’s what matters a lot of the time.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

It’s time for new World Champion Steve Maclin’s Changing Of The Guard ceremony. Maclin walks to the ring under military guard and talks about having to learn who he was when he came back. Now he’s the World Champion and issues the open challenge to any Canadian. Cue Scott D’Amore to say he’s not happy with Maclin being the champion but he earned it. Why did Maclin take so long to go after Josh Alexander during his record title reign?

Maclin laughs him off because he was hoping the old D’Amore would show up. D’Amore says Maclin hit him like a coward and the jacket comes off. If Maclin wants to face a Canadian at Under Siege, he can face the perfect Canadian: Perfect Creation One, PCO! Cue PCO to beat up the guards, with Maclin bailing. Some guards are put through a table to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I’m running out of ways to say it but Impact continues to be a completely watchable wrestling show every week. You can follow the stories really easily and it isn’t hard to jump into a lot of this stuff. They were at a new starting point with a lot of the stories this week, but there is enough to have more going on next week. Good show here, with a rather nice opener and a surprise first challenger for Maclin makes it even better.

Results
Time Machine b. Trey Miguel/Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey – Cradle Shock to Miguel
Alisha Edwards b. Tara Rysing – Facebuster
Moose b. Yuya Uemura – Spear
Frankie Kazarian b. Good Hands – Chickenwing to Skyler
Joe Hendry b. Sheldon Jean – Standing Ovation

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 13, 2023: Worth Filing Out For

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 13, 2023
Location: St. Clair College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

The road to Rebellion end this week and that means it is time to finish off the build towards the show. In this case it means we are going to be seeing more build towards the new World Title match of Kushida vs. Steve Maclin. This week will also see what happens with Mickie James and the Knockouts Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Kenny King vs. Frankie Kazarian

The winner gets the advantage in the Hardcore War at Rebellion and the other teams are at ringside. They fight over a lockup to start until Kazarian snaps off some chops. King cuts him off though and starts hammering away in the corner to take over. A backbreaker gives King two and we hit the one armed camel clutch. Kazarian breaks it up and makes the clothesline comeback, capped off by a running forearm.

The springboard spinning legdrop gives Kazarian two but King is back with a tiger driver for the same. King sends him to the floor but Kazarian comes back in with a slingshot cutter for two. The brawl on the floor finally breaks out as Kazarian gets the chickenwing. Cue Brian Myers for a distraction, allowing Moose to spear Kazarian down for the pin at 8:18.

Rating: B-. These two were having a good match until the screwy ending, which was quite the twist as Myers and Moose haven’t had anything to do with this feud so far. They would be an upgrade over the Good Hands for the match but that might be asking too much. For now though, I’ll settle for talented wrestlers having a good match to open the show, as is the norm around here.

Post match the beatdown is on and Team Dreamer is left laying.

Earlier tonight, Steve Maclin interrupted the Canadian National Anthem. Kushida made the save and cleaned house in a brawl.

Lince Dorado vs. Black Taurus vs. Laredo Kid vs. Rich Swann

Crazzy Steve handles Taurus’ intro. Taurus sends everyone to the floor to start and hits the big dive, only to have a triple superkick send him to the floor. That means the dives can take him out and leave everyone down as we take a break. Back with Taurus launching Dorado onto the top, where he can superplex Kid (while on top of Taurus’ shoulders for a crazy visual).

Back up and Kid hits a springboard armdrag to Swann, followed by a double Golden Rewind from Dorado. Taurus is back in to clean house, including a heck of a pop up Samoan drop to Dorado. That’s not enough as Taurus powerbombs Kid onto Swann at ringside. Taurus cleans house and goes up, only to have Kid catch him with a super Spanish Fly for the pin at 10:44.

Rating: B-. This might not have broken the mold for a match like this but they did their thing well. Kid has felt like he should be the next breakout star in the division almost every time he is around but nothing has ever really clicked. It seems like they’re trying it again and pinning Taurus is certainly a good way to start. Taurus got to show off again here and that power is always worth a look. Fun match, as expected.

Long video on the Bullet Club vs. the Motor City Machine Guns in Ultimate X for the Tag Team Titles.

Jessicka and Rosemary want to go to the Undead Realm to get Taya Valkyrie back but Rosemary says she’s going alone because Jessicka doesn’t know how to do it. She opens the coffin….but it’s just a regular one instead of the portal. The Coven must be behind this!

Jessicka vs. Taylor Wilde

Rosemary and KiLynn King are here too. Hold on as Wilde gives Jessicka a tarot card to start so Jessicka shows it to Rosemary. That lets Wilde jump her from behind so Jessicka says STOP HITTING ME. Jessicka misses a charge and gets choked in the corner before a Backstabber brings Jessicka down again. Back up and some jabs stagger Wilde, setting up a running crossbody for two. Rosemary and King get into it, allowing Wilde to slip out of a Sick Driver and grab a fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin at 4:28.

Rating: C. The more I see of Wilde, the more amazed I am by the fact that she is the same woman who came back to almost no reaction last year. This is a completely different way to go for her and it is working rather well. The Coven has been a nice breath of air for the division and I could go for them holding the titles that much longer.

Jordynne Grace is ready for the Knockouts Title match at Rebellion but she can’t control what happens with Mickie James. She can control winning though.

Alisha Edwards is glad to have brought Eddie Edwards back to the right path. Now they want to get rid of the monster blocking his path.

Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry vs. Angels/Callihan

Before the match, Hendry confirms our belief in him. The rest of the Design is here too because what would it be like without the rest of them. Callihan suplexes Hendry for a fast two so Angels comes in, only to get suplexed as well. Dango comes in for the Dirtbag Shuffle but Angels takes him down. Callihan is whipped into Angels though and it’s back to Dango to clean house. Kon grabs the leg though and it’s a standing Sliced Bread to drop Hendry. A frog splash gets two, with Hendry making the save. Callihan hits Angels by mistake so Deaner stops to yell, leaving Hendry to hit the Standing Ovation for the pin at 4:39.

Rating: C. Egads I don’t know how much more I can take of this story. It feels like it has been going on forever and the Design somehow gets lamer every single week. Just get to someone turning on someone so they can have their big violent match and we can move on. Dango continues to do fine in his role and it’s nice to see him getting away from the dancing stuff. Hendry continues to be awesome and that’s all he needs to be.

Post match the Design jumps them again, until Santino Marella comes out for the save. This includes the Cobra because….oh my head hurts again.

Video on Steve Maclin vs. Kushida.

PCO promises to bury Eddie Edwards in a Last Rites match at Rebellion.

Bully Ray introduces Moose and Brian Myers as new members of his now seven person army. They’re ready for Rebellion and promise destruction because they’re family. Keep in mind that this is all to destroy TOMMY DREAMER.

Gisele Shaw vs. Tasha Steelz

Jai Vidal and Savannah Evans are here with Shaw. Steelz scares her to the floor to start before Steelz slaps her in the face back inside. That sends Shaw back to the floor and we take a break. Back with Shaw slapping her in the face as the theme continues. Steelz chops away but Shawn knocks her outside, where Evans hits a chokeslam onto the apron.

A snap suplex gives Shaw two more and we hit the reverse chinlock. With that broken up, Shaw hits a double jumping stomp in the corner and we take another break. Back again with Shaw hitting a running jumping uppercut for two more, followed by a swinging suplex for the same.

Steelz fights up and hits an ax handle into an atomic drop into a…completely missed jumping neckbreaker. Shaw’s belly to back toss sets up a running shot to the back of the head for two. The annoyed Shaw stomps away in the corner before they head outside for a slugout. Steelz sends her into the steps but misses a running knee, which only hits said steps. Back in and Steelz kicks the knee out for the pin at 21:23.

Rating: C+. Something tells me we didn’t miss much between those breaks as I have a hard time believing that these two had a pay per view main event length match out of nowhere. It wouldn’t surprise me if this had to be extended due to the Mickie James injury and if that is the case, they did rather well in an area they probably haven’t been in before.

Mickie James tells Santino Marella that the doctor has given her a diagnosis of her rib injury.

The fans leave the arena for Mickie’s announcement. I’m assuming this is to avoid the announcement getting out, but it comes off like some tragedy.

Rebellion rundown. Apparently Brian Myers and Moose are taking the Good Hands’ spots on Team Bully. At least they don’t have to find two more people for Team Dreamer.

Video on Mickie James’ Last Rodeo and path to winning the Knockouts Title again, plus Jordynne Grace and Deonna Purrazzo waiting for their shots.

Here is Mickie for her big announcement. When she started the Last Rodeo, she wanted to show that she still had it and that is what she did. At some point, every champion has to lose and she can handle some of that, but she can’t fight age. There is a difference between her and most of the division, but she feels like she is 20.

The fact that she isn’t makes this even worse and she thanks everyone for this Last Rodeo. She just got off the phone with the doctor though and she isn’t cleared to compete at Rebellion. She is a woman of her word and it is Deonna and Jordynne’s (watching in the back) time now. Mickie leaves the title, and her hat, in the ring and leaves. Grace leaves and Deonna looks on to end the show. This felt a lot like a retirement speech, but retiring over a broken bone feels like quite the stretch. James should be back and probably will, as ending a legendary career over something that will heal in a month or two is nuts.

Overall Rating: B-. The Mickie angle at the end was actually emotional and felt like a huge deal, which should set up the Knockouts Title match that much better. Other than that, the card for Rebellion was already mostly set coming into this show so there only so much that needed to be done. This show did well enough with the little that it had to cover, so nice job on hammering things down on the go home show.

Results
Kenny King b. Frankie Kazarian – Spear from Moose
Laredo Kid b. Black Taurus, Lince Dorado and Rich Swann – Super Spanish Fly to Taurus
Taylor Wilde b. Jessicka – Fisherman’s neckbreaker
Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry b. Callihan/Angels – Standing Ovation to Angels
Tasha Steelz b. Gisele Shaw – Kick to the knee

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – March 23, 2023: Leave The Memories Alone

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 23, 2023
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

It is the night before Sacrifice and we are eight days away from Multiverse United. That means it is time to build up both shows at the last minute, as there is still some work that needs to be done. The good thing is that both shows already have quite a bit set and now the final touches can be applied. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Steve Maclin vs. Josh Alexander, including Maclin costing Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian a six man tag last week.

Opening sequence.

The Design vs. Time Machine

Callihan is here with the Design. Kushida squares up to Kon to start but Sabin comes in as well, allowing Kon to clothesline both of them down. Deaner comes in and gets struck down by the Guns, only to take Sabin into the wrong corner. It’s off to Angels to trade chops with Sabin before a leg lariat puts Sabin down. Sabin ties Angels up though and Kushida/Shelley kick Angels’ arms out to take over.

There’s a running hesitation dropkick in the corner to hit Angels again and Shelley stays on the bad arm. Kushida snaps the arm across the top and it’s off to a double arm crank. Sabin comes back in but gets taken into the wrong corner so Angels can choke a bit. A sunset flip gets two on Deaner and Sabin dives over to Kushida for the tag. House is quickly cleaned and everything breaks down, with Kushida and Shelley taking over on Deaner’s arm for a change.

The handspring kick knocks Kon off the apron and Kushida hits a big dive to the floor to take out a variety of people. We take a break and come back with Angels (favoring his arm) and Kushida trading their forearms. Deaner kicks Kushida in the head and Kon’s spinebuster sets up Angel’s frog splash for two. A double clothesline Doomsday Device gets two on Kushida as Shelley makes the save.

Everything breaks down again and Angels is left alone, setting up a triple Dream Sequence. A triple kick in the head looks to set up Skull And Bones but Deaner makes the save. Hold on though as Callihan gets in to protect Deaner, leaving Callihan to get taken down as well. Angel’s dive is loaded up but he gets pulled into the Hoverboard Lock. Sabin kicks the arm away from the ropes and Angels taps at 18:50.

Rating: C+. Well that was….long. I’m not sure why anyone thinks there is a need for a Design match to go nearly twenty minutes but thankfully Time Machine was there to balance things out a bit. The action was fine but I can’t understand what is supposed to be interesting about the Design. It would be great to finally get to whatever they’re setting up with Callihan, because there has been almost nothing interesting so far and I have no reason to believe that is going to change.

The Coven is happy to be the new Knockouts Tag Team Champions and like magic.

Raj Singh and Shera are rich and like it in Las Vegas. The former is so rich that he’s now Champagne Singh as we just keep up the stereotypes.

Eddie Edwards is in the back with Kenny King and talks about how he has to get rid of PCO. That’s why he has brought in help, with King talking about how they realized they needed each other at Jay Briscoe’s mama’s house. PCO was never family like them, so King is going to take PCO out at Sacrifice.

Savannah Evans vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal are here with Evans. Purrazzo slugs away to start but gets shoved down without much effort. There’s a running splash to crush Purrazzo in the corner and Evans throws her right back out. Purrazzo manages to snap off a running hurricanrana though and Evans crashes out to the floor. The baseball slide drops Evans again but a Shaw distraction lets Evans send Purrazzo into various things.

We take a break and come back with Purrazzo still in trouble as Shaw is rather pleased. A running shoulder in the corner sets up a butterfly suplex as Purrazzo is getting crushed here. The chinlock goes on as Shaw’s slapping the mat over and over again sounds like someone knocking on a door.

Purrazzo fights up and gets a boot up in the corner before going after the arm. That doesn’t work so Purrazzo hits a running knee into a Russian legsweep. Now the Fujiwara armbar can go on, with Evans making it over to the rope. Back up and Evans snaps off a suplex but gets kicked in the head. Evans is sent to the apron but the distractions are on. Evans accidentally kicks Vidal down and Purrazzo gets rid of Shaw, setting up a crucifix to pin Evans at 13:51.

Rating: C. This was another long match and mostly a squash until Purrazzo beat up two people at once to beat Evans. Purrazzo is geared up for her match with Shaw at Sacrifice and now we should be in for a showdown tomorrow night. Evans continues to look like a monster for most of her matches but then comes up short in the end, which could go somewhere in the future.

Post match Evans lays Purrazzo out and Shaw helps out with the beating. This goes on for a bit and no one saves Purrazzo.

Flashback Moment Of The Week (They still do these?): The Motor City Machine Guns b. Team 3D and Beer Money at Sacrifice 2010.

The Death Dollz are mad at losing the Knockouts Tag Team Titles with Taya Valkyrie trying to calm the other two down. They need a new plan! Jessika isn’t having that and goes after the Coven right now, only to find….a casket. Jessika opens it up and finds….well we’re not sure as Taya slams it shut. A hand reaches out of the casket and pulls Taya in. Where to you ask? AEW.

Bully Ray/Masha Slamovich vs. Tommy Dreamer/Mickie James

For those of you who needed a preview of Dreamer vs. Ray. The men start things off with Ray going after Mickie instead. Ray wants Mickie to come in and she does exactly that after about a minute of staring. Slamovich comes in for the slugout about two minutes in but Mickie plants her with a flapjack. It’s off to Dreamer for some arm cranking before Mickie comes back in, only to have Ray pull her down by the hair.

Ray comes in for a slam as commentary is quiet for a lot of long stretches. Mickie slips away though and hands it back to Dreamer for right hands in the corner. A cutter gives Dreamer two with Slamovich making the save. The top rope seated senton drops Slamovich and Mickie plays D-Von with a WHAT’S UP (ax handle version). Everything breaks down and Ray loads up a table as Mickie dives onto Slamovich. The distraction lets Ray hit Dreamer low, setting up a piledriver for the pin at 9:26.

Rating: C. This worked when Mickie and Masha were in there, with Ray being ok enough. I’m completely with caring about anything Dreamer does, but at least his stuff was kept short. What mattered here was having the two matches set up, as strange as it is that seeing Ray pin Dreamer before they have a first blood match. Then again having them in what is very possibly the main event of a show in 2023 is strange enough.

Post match Ray loads up a powerbomb on James but here is Jordynne Grace to break it up. Grace and Ray stare each other down and Grace spears….Mickie by mistake as Ray moves.

Rich Swann and Frankie Kazarian are in the back with Swann being upset about last week. Kazarian wants him to go find Josh Alexander and settle this now. Post break Swann goes into Alexander’s locker room and finds Steve Maclin. Swann yells, with Maclin saying maybe Alexander wanted him here. Swann is confused.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry vs. Moose/Brian Myers

Before the match, Dango insists that we believe in Hendry and the fans seem pleased. Hendry headlocks Myers to start and then runs him over with a shoulder. A delayed suplex drops Myers and Dango comes in as Myers rolls into the corner. Moose comes in and takes Dango into the corner but Hendry comes in to clear the ring. Hendry and Dango have two words for us….but Dango has to be reminded that they aren’t SUCK IT.

We take a break and come back with Moose sending Dango into the corner and knocking Hendry off the apron. Myers drops Dango as the alternating beatdowns continue. Moose charges into a boot in the corner though and a middle rope corkscrew uppercut gives Dango a breather. The tag brings in Hendry to clean house and a pop up powerbomb gets two on Myers. Everything breaks down and Moose spears Hendry down. Myers’ Roster Cut finishes Hendry at 13:44.

Rating: C+. Nice tag match here which set up the title match on Friday. Hendry continues to feel like a star and someone who could be a big deal if he is given the chance at some point down the line. Seeing him get pinned in a tag match is kind of a big deal as Hendry has been such a star, but he’ll be fine if he retains the title at Sacrifice.

Josh Alexander goes into his locker room and finds Rich Swann, who wants to know why Steve Maclin was here. Alexander, who is remarkably calm about two people apparently having been in his locker room, is off to find out what is going on here.

Here is Josh Alexander to talk about Steve Maclin. Alexander has seen Maclin leave a trail of bodies around here and he can respect that. What he can’t respect is the allegation that he is ducking Maclin. All that makes Maclin is someone complaining and a…..forgotten son. Cue Maclin to say that yes he is afraid to fail because he doesn’t want to go all the way back to the bottom.

He is obsessed with winning the Impact World Title and we see clips of Maclin watching Alexander’s matches from the shadows during his title reign. Alexander says he respects Maclin so bring it on right now. Maclin says nah, because he’s going to do it in Alexander’s hometown at Rebellion.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling wasn’t great here but it did a nice enough job of building up Sacrifice. That is trickier than it seems though, as the show isn’t the biggest in the world. The main event very well may be Dreamer vs. Ray, as the only other real option is Mickie vs. Grace. Once that is out of the way though, we’re on to Rebellion and that should work well.

So……you might need to forget a good bit of this show, as both Josh Alexander (torn tricep) and Mickie James (undisclosed) are injured and have been forced to vacate their titles. The Knockouts Title will be determined at Sacrifice and the World Title at Rebellion, with Steve Maclin facing Kushida. No word on what happens to the Multiverse United card. Egads that’s horrible, as they might have just lost their two top stars at once.

Results
Time Machine b. The Design – Hoverboard Lock to Angels
Deonna Purrazzo b. Savannah Evans – Crucifix
Bully Ray/Masha Slamovich b. Mickie James/Tommy Dreamer – Piledriver to Dreamer
Moose/Brian Myers b. Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry – Roster Cut to Hendry

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 9, 2023: There’s Good And Bad

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 9, 2023
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are on our way to a trio of shows with Sacrifice, Multiverse United and Rebellion, which makes for quite the packed series of builds. That got started last week with a little something for each show getting time, but they are going to have to do it again for the next few weeks. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Here is Bully Ray to get things going. At No Surrender, Tommy Dreamer used the words “someone like me” (meaning Ray). What did he mean when he said that? Did he mean a two time Hall of Famer or half of the greatest tag team ever? Maybe a two time World Champion?

Ray wishes he knew what Dreamer meant, because he threw hot coffee into Dreamer’s face. Dreamer wants a Busted Open match at Sacrifice but there is no way Dreamer is making it there. Cue Santino Marella to call Bully “Bobby Ray” and say that Dreamer will be at Sacrifice. It was only a minor burn to his balls….er, eyeball so he’ll be fine.

Cue Bhupinder Gujjar to speak Hindi and issue a challenge for right now. Santino makes the match and we’re on. This Santino stuff is getting REALLY old as he’s still doing the same “gee I sure do talk funny” shtick, which can be charming for all of 12 seconds before you realize that he’s making the crowd chuckle over what was supposed to be a serious angle.

Bhupinder Gujjar vs. Bully Ray

Ray’s chain shot doesn’t work to start so he clotheslines Gujjar down instead. Gujjar gets up and yells a lot, seemingly inviting Ray to hit him. Ray’s right hands are shrugged off and Gujjar dropkicks him down. Ray catches him on top though and loads up the chain, which takes too long as well, allowing Gujjar to get in a shot of his own. Gujjar loads up the chain but gets low blowed for the DQ at 3:31.

Rating: D+. Remember when Gujjar was looking like he could be something? Well now he’s cannon fodder in the star making feud between Bully Ray and Tommy Dreamer. This was hardly a high energy match and was much more about Ray trying to get out of having the actual match. Nothing to see here, but thank goodness Ray got his time in.

Post match Ray chains Gujjar in the back but Tommy Dreamer comes in for the save (Why didn’t he come out earlier?). Cue Masha Slamovich to hit Dreamer low but Mickie James makes the save. The women brawl until Dreamer gets up to chase Ray off with a chair.

PCO is next to a grave with a shovel and screams for Eddie Edwards to come fight him.

Josh Alexander comes up to Rich Swann and gets him on his team for a six man at Sacrifice. Steve Maclin comes in but Swann says this isn’t about him. Frankie Kazarian comes in and Maclin leaves, with Kazarian seemingly joining Swann and Alexander at Sacrifice.

Callihan vs. Rhino

The Design and Heath are here too. They trade shoulders to start and neither goes anywhere. The fight heads outside with Callihan raking the eyes and posting him to take over. A Russian legsweep on the ramp puts Rhino down again and the seconds get in an argument. We take a break and come back with Rhino hitting a TKO for two, followed by a belly to belly. A hard clothesline out of the corner cuts Rhino off but it’s too early for the Cactus Driver 97. Angels grabs Callihan’s foot though and Khan adds a chair to the face, allowing Rhino to hit the Gore for the pin at 10:11.

Rating: C. This was as good as a ten minute Rhino vs. Callihan match was going to be as there is only so much the two of them are going to pull off. Rhino is still able to have a watchable enough match and it is nice to see him get a win here. At the same time, the Callihan/Design stuff is still pretty horrible and it needs to wrap up soon. It won’t, but it needs to.

Trey Miguel interrupts Dirty Dango and Santino Marella in the back, asking what they’re going to do for him. That works for Santino, who makes Miguel vs. a handpicked opponent at Sacrifice, plus a six way match for the X-Division Title at Multiverse United. Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in to see if Miguel is as tall as Sky Low Low. With Miguel gone, Swinger asks about facing Dango, who says he’s the assistant Director of Authority. Swinger and Dice leave, so Marella says that isn’t Dango’s job. Dango: “It’s not a job. It’s a way of life.”

During the break, Callihan was mad at the Design but was told that was step #6.

Jordynne Grace vs. Alex Gracia

Grace powers her into the corner to start as we hear about Grace competing as a bodybuilder. A German suplex out of the corner gets two on Gracia but the Grace Driver is blocked. Instead Grace grabs a torture rack spin into a powerbomb. Now the Grace Driver finishes Gracia off at 2:26.

Moose comes up to Joe Hendry, who is telling jokes to a bunch of fans. Brian Myers jumps Hendry from behind and the big beatdown is on.

The Bullet Club, complete with Kenta, come in to mock Josh Alexander/Frankie Kazarian/Rich Swann. The six man is set for next week. Alexander mocks Ace Austin and Chris Bey for being overly excited about being the Tag Team Champions, which doesn’t sit well with the champs.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Kushida

They go technical to start (yes really) with neither being able to get very far. Instead they shake hands and spin around a lot while fighting over arm control. Neither gets very far so Kushida takes it to the mat and rides him a bit. Gresham reverses into a hammerlock on the mat but Kushida gets to his feet, with Gresham still cranking away. It’s finally broken up and Kushida stomps on Gresham’s hand but Gresham is right back with another armbar.

Kushida’s armbar sends Gresham to the rope so Kushida dropkicks the arm to keep him in trouble. Gresham is right back with la majistral for two so he tries it again, only to get reversed into a cradle to give Kushida two of his own. Back up and Kushida sends him into the ropes, which bangs up Gresham’s arm again. The Hoverboard Lock makes Gresham tap at 10:04.

Rating: B-. This was the technical match that you knew it would be and it made Kushida look that much better because he beat someone on his level. Both of them are established names but Kushida is on his way to the World Title shot at Multiverse United so he needed the win here. Good match, and different from everything else on the show.

Eddie Edwards goes to the grave where PCO called him out. That sounds like a very bad idea.

Here is Killer Kelly to sit in a chair and call out Taylor Wilde. Cue Wilde, who says this isn’t about Kelly but rather the future. Kelly doesn’t think much of Wilde telling the future with cards, because she controls her own destiny. Taylor pulls out the tower card and it’s KiLynn King coming in from behind to chair Kelly down. A Death Valley Driver plants Kelly again. I’ve liked King in the past so this is interesting.

Still at the grave, PCO swings his shovel at a rock.

The Death Dollz teleport in to console Killer Kelly, with Rosemary telling her that she needs to grasp the darker realm. Kelly doesn’t seem convinced but says she can handle a 2-1 situation herself. With Kelly gone, KiLynn King and Taylor Wilde come in to make the Knockouts Tag Team Titles challenge. Rosemary is in, if King and Wilde agree to give up the dark arts if they lose. Deal.

Eddie Edwards arrives at the grave but there is no PCO. Then PCO pops up behind him but misses the big swing with the shovel. They fight a bit and PCO sends him into a rock. Eddie manages to grab the shovel but PCO drops him with a reverse DDT (as you do in a fight by a grave). PCO sends him into the grave but here’s a car to run PCO over. Eddie gets in the car and rides away but we never see who is driving.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Knockouts Title: Gisele Shaw vs. Mickie James

Shaw, with Jai Vidal and Savannah Evans, is challenging and Deonna Purrazzo is on commentary. Mickie takes her down with a headlock to start but gets reversed into a headscissors. Back up and they fight over wrist control until Mickie sends her outside for a crash to send us to a break.

We come back with Shaw sending her into the corner to take over. Mickie’s Thesz press gives her a breather though and they slowly slug it out. Shaw gets the better of things and grabs a reverse chinlock to keep James down. Back up and Shaw charges into a boot in the corner, allowing Mickie to hurricanrana her out. The comeback is on but Mickie has to dive onto the goons on the floor.

Shaw gets in a cheap shot to take over again though and the chops have Mickie in trouble in the corner. A pull of the hair drops Mickie again but she explodes out of the corner for the double knockdown. Mickie strikes away and hits a flapjack as the referee seems to tell her how much time is left. The top rope Thesz press gets two on Shaw but Vidal’s distraction breaks up the MickieDT. Purrazzo breaks that up so Shaw grabs a rollup, only to have Purrazzo turn it back over so Mickie can retain at 17:00.

Rating: B-. This match got a lot of time and the ending seems to bring Purrazzo either into the title picture or in line for a showdown with Shaw (or perhaps both). For now though, these two had a good match, with Shaw holding up her end and James being her usual awesome self. It felt like a big time main event and that is a hard trick to pull off a lot of the time.

Overall Rating: C+. This show got better as it went on but there were definitely some rocky points. There are some parts here which just aren’t very good and give me no reason to want to see what happens in them from week to week. Stuff such as Ray vs. Dreamer and the Design/Callihan stuff is just there with few positives to either of them and it hurts to watch them. Then on the other hand you have the solid Knockouts division and the main event feuds, though a lot of that seems to be on hold until we get closer to the build to Rebellion. For now though, the bad stuff gets bailed out, as the positives are quite positive.

Results
Bhupinder Gujjar b. Bully Ray via DQ when Ray hit him low
Rhino b. Callihan – Gore
Jordynne Grace b. Alex Gracia – Grace Driver
Kushida b. Jonathan Gresham – Hoverboard Lock
Mickie James b. Gisele Shaw – Rollup

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – March 2, 2023: They Needed Some New Blood

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 2, 2023
Location: Sam’s Town Hotel & Gambling Hall, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are done with No Surrender and that means we are at least one step closer to Rebellion in April. Josh Alexander is still the World Champion after retaining over Rich Swann, but now Steve Maclin is waiting on the champ. That should make for a good buildup and they have time to make it work. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of No Surrender.

Here is the Bullet Club for a chat to start. Chris Bey is rather happy about what he and Ace Austin have been doing lately, including beating the Motor City Machine Guns (in a six man tag) at No Surrender. Bey talks about helping set up the ring in this building before making his Impact Wrestling debut here as well. It turns out that Austin debuted here too but he would rather talk about beating Chris Sabin.

After revealing Austin’s “I BEAT CHRIS SABIN”, we get a quick audience poll over who the best team around here really is. Cue the Motor City Machine Guns, with Sabin asking how long the Club has been together. The Guns have been around since 2006 and they’re still the champs. The Club says that is just because they haven’t gotten a fair shot. Maybe they could fix that at Sacrifice? The Guns talk about how they are still the best team and offer the title match tonight. Game/match on.

Shane Haste, who is going to be part of Multiverse United on March 30, he is ready to take out Mike Bailey tonight. He even throws in some karate moves.

Rich Swann cuts off a question about his loss at No Surrender to admit that yes, he did lose. That doesn’t sit well with him but he isn’t going to let that loss define him. He wants the World Title back but here are Raj Singh and Shera, the former of which has a lot of money that he keeps handing out. Swann isn’t happy and is ready to fight Shera but Singh calms it down and wants to hit the casino instead.

Mike Bailey vs. Shane Haste

Bailey takes him down to start and they grapple on the mat until Haste has to duck a big kick. A snapmare sets up a basement dropkick to the back of Bailey’s head but he strikes his way out of trouble. The bouncing kicks send Haste to the apron but he’s fine enough to drop Bailey onto the apron. Bailey’s head is crushed against the post before Haste takes him back inside for a Saito suplex.

We take a break and come back with Haste still hammering away but getting shoved off the top. A missile dropkick hits Haste and Bailey gets to kick away. Haste kicks him in the face though and suplexes him into a cutter for two. Bailey fights back and sends him outside for a springboard moonsault. One heck of a dropkick sets up a sitout Last Ride for two on Bailey back inside. Bailey counters a fireman’s carry into a poisonrana though and a superkick drops Haste again. The Ultimate Weapon finishes Haste at 14:40.

Rating: C+. This was a hard hitting match that made Haste look good but Bailey is too big of a star to lose here. Haste is someone who will be around at Multiverse United and then leave while Bailey is likely to be around a lot longer. It wouldn’t surprise me to see Bailey in the World Title hunt sooner rather than later so he isn’t losing here.

The Design is in the back when Rhino comes in. Rhino doesn’t like what the team does and he won’t let them do it to Sami Callihan. Cue Callihan to say he’s where he wants to be, so Rhino says he’ll knock some sanity into Callihan. Deaner calls this step #6.

Kenny King vs. Kevin Knight

King isn’t interested in a handshake and elbows Knight in the face instead. Knight is back up and knocks King outside, which means a missed dive with King sidestepping him in a not quite Samoa Joe counter. King tries to throw him back in but gets caught with a dive. Back in for real this time and King strikes him down for two before grabbing the reverse chinlock.

The swinging backbreaker gets two on Knight and we’re off to a camel clutch. Knight is back up with some rollups for two each, followed by a pump kick. A springboard spinning crossbody gives Knight two but King grabs a spinebuster for the same. The Royal Flush gives King the pin at 6:01.

Rating: C. Knight is someone who has potential but for now he is in need of ring time. He wrestles an exciting enough style and can work with anyone, though King seems like he is on the way to a title shot sooner than later. This was a completely watchable match, though it didn’t come near the next level.

We look at Kushida holding Josh Alexander in the Hoverboard Lock during the pin in a tag match at New Japan Battle In The Valley.

Josh Alexander is read to face Kushida at Rebellion. First though, he has to get by Kushida at Multiverse United, but first he wants a six man tag at Sacrifice. It can be Kushida/the Motor City Machine Guns against Alexander and whomever he can find. Cue Steve Maclin to say keep the title safe until Rebellion.

We look at Bully Ray throwing coffee at Tommy Dreamer at No Surrender.

The doctor tells Santino Marella and Dirty Dango about Dreamer’s condition. Bully Ray comes in to make sure Dreamer will live so he can beat Dreamer up. Bhupinder Gujjar comes in to yell at Ray, who doesn’t have time for this because Gujjar won’t be relevant in ten years. Gujjar grabs him by the sweatshirt and says Dreamer is his friend. Ray can respect that…and then slaps him in the face.

Here is Mickie James to be glad about retaining her Knockouts Title against Masha Slamovich at No Surrender. No one said she could do it but then she did it. Now though, there is a little bit of controversy as Jordynne Grace is saying Mickie tapped out at Hard To Kill. Mickie has been saying that since she got done with Masha…and here are Gisele Shaw and company to interrupt.

Shaw says Mickie is going after Grace to hide from the real challenger and ducking her. Mickie brings up that she beat Shaw already, but Shaw says that wasn’t THIS version of her. We hear about how great Shaw is and she says she’s waiting for Mickie when Mickie is done with Grace. Mickie is ready to fight now but Shaw isn’t in her gear. That’s the difference between a diva and a woman as Mickie still wants to fight, so here is Gail Kim to make the match.

Moose comes in to see Brian Myers and says he wants to humiliate Joe Hendry. Myers seems intrigued. Hendry has beaten Moose twice now. Why is this still going?

Jordynne Grace isn’t happy with Gisele Shaw getting a title shot but she’ll have hers at Sacrifice. Santino Marella says deal but then gets interrupted by Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice. Swinger says no one can win fifty straight matches and he is tired of having everyone against him. Marella makes him a deal: he can pick ANYONE on the roster to face. Works for Swinger.

PCO vs. Trey Miguel

Non-title and this could be interesting. Miguel bails to the apron to start but gets pulled in for a crash. PCO blasts him with a clothesline and they head outside with PCO hitting a hard backbreaker. The running flip dive through the ropes only hits floor though and the PCO shaped thud sounds rather painful. We take a break and come back with Miguel kicking him down but PCO stands right back up. There’s a pop up powerbomb to plant Miguel again but Eddie Edwards comes in and hits PCO in the back with a shovel for the DQ at 8:42.

Rating: C+. I liked this one and could go for more with either being the good or bad guy. Miguel having to run and try to survive against the monster is interesting but Miguel trying to slay the monster as the underdog hero could work as well. This could have been more but Edwards vs. PCO is the real feud and you don’t want your champion losing, even to someone as unstoppable as PCO.

Post match PCO goes after Edwards, with security breaking it up. That’s fine with PCO, who PCOsaults down onto all of them (that was scary/great).

Here is what is coming on various shows, including a Mercedes Mone promo for her match against Kairi.

Tag Team Titles: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Bullet Club

Bullet Club is challenging. Sabin and Austin flip out of an exchange of wristlocks to start but everyone comes in for the staredown. Shelley comes in to take Austin down but it’s off to Bey for the slugout. Everything breaks down and Sabin accidentally shoulders Shelley in the corner. The Guns are sent outside for the stereo suicide dives as the Club is rolling here.

Back in and Austin slices Shelley’s mouth with the playing card before sliding the card up his sleeve (he’s not a great magician if you can see it on national TV). Shelley manages a shot to Bey’s weakened (by Kushida over the last few weeks, as mentioned by commentary) arm and Sabin gets in a cheap shot behind the referee’s back (that’s different). Sabin even dives off the apron to drop Bey on the floor as Shelley takes Austin off the apron (and takes his place to offer Bey a tag in a funny bit). The Border City Stretch doesn’t last long but Sabin kicks Bey’s arm from the apron as we take a break.

Back with Shelley chopping the post instead of Bey and Sabin doing the same. Bey still can’t get over for the tag as Sabin stomps on the arm on the apron. An enziguri gets Bey out of trouble and it’s Austin coming back in to start cleaning house. Everything breaks down and Bey hits the one armed flip dive to drop the Guns.

Back in and Sabin hits his tornado DDT/dropkick combination but Austin kicks Sabin down again. Sabin gets a standing Kimura on Bey as Shelley takes Austin down by the leg. Cradle Shock is broken up and Bey hits a quick cutter on Sabin. Shelley gets dropped with a cutter of his own but the assisted Art of Finesse is broken up. A doomsday missile dropkick hits Bey and Shell Shock gives Shelley two.

The Border City Stretch sends Bey to the rope so Shelley puts it on again. Austin’s save fails as he gets caught in Cradle Shock as Bey reverses Shelley into a rollup for two more. The Guns kick Bey in the head but Austin makes the save. A pair of spinning kicks to the head send Sabin outside. The assisted Art of Finesse into the Fold is enough to give Bey the pin and the titles at 22:04.

Rating: B. This was a heck of a match and it was interesting to see the roles reversed. You don’t see the Guns working heel that often and while they were only leaning into it here, it was different enough to catch your attention. At the same time, the Club won completely clean, which is more than I would have expected. Awesome match here and the Club feels like a breakout team waiting to happen.

The new champs celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The main event is by far the best part here and it anchored a strong show. They have some momentum coming out of No Surrender, but at the same time, they are now building towards three shows at once. That could get more than a little complicated, but at least Rebellion is far enough away that Sacrifice and Multiverse United can be covered before we get there. Very good show here and I liked pretty much everything.

Results
Mike Bailey b. Shane Haste – Ultimate Weapon
Kenny King b. Kevin Knight – Royal Flush
PCO b. Trey Miguel via DQ when Eddie Edwards interfered
Bullet Club b. Motor City Machine Guns – Fold to Shelley

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – February 9, 2023: Fare Not Well

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 9, 2023
Location: Osceola Heritage Park, Kissimmee, Florida
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

No Surrender is coming up and most of the card has been set up so far. That includes the World Title match, which has not exactly gotten a ton of hype. Maybe it is because it seems we have another challenger on the horizon, but Rich Swann challenging Josh Alexander isn’t exactly feeling huge. Hopefully they can get some more of it covered this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Matt Cardona arrives and says he’s in the main event tonight. He is shown to his private dressing room with champagne and shrimp cocktails, but it turns out this is Joe Hendry’s room. Cardona is shown to a closet instead.

No Surrender #1 Contenders Qualifying Match: Brian Myers vs. Dirty Dango

They run the ropes to start until Dango armdrags him into an armbar. Myers’ sunset flip is blocked and Dango drops a leg before they head outside. A posting cuts Dango off and of course Myers is fine to try for a countout. Back in and we hit the chinlock, complete with trash talking. Dango fights up and they collide for a double knockdown. A Russian legsweep sets up the Dirtbag Shuffle, followed by a top rope ax handle to send Myers outside. That’s fine with Myers who hits a Roster Cut on the floor, followed by another inside for the pin at 6:50.

Rating: C. I’m kind of digging the more serious Dango, who has been shifting away from a lot of the comedy and wrestling more traditional matches. As it turns out, he can do those well enough to get by and even do well in some places. Myers is a bigger name and easier to take more seriously so it makes sense for him to win, but Dango has been doing well lately.

Gisele Shaw, with Jai Vidal, messes up a few meals at catering. Deonna Purrazzo doesn’t like what Shaw has been saying lately though and throws what looks like chili in her face. Santino Marella comes in to make a No Surrender match.

Trey Miguel thinks Crazzy Steve is in fact crazy and wants nothing more to do with him. Steve’s laughter is heard and a bloody version of Miguel’s logo appears. Miguel freaks out.

Good Hands vs. Mickie James/Tommy Dreamer

Before the match, the Good Hands talk about how much they hate Florida, which is nowhere as valuable as a hand. Mickie and Hotch start things off with Mickie taking him down without much effort. Dreamer comes in to stay on the arm with James coming right back in with a top rope ax handle to said arm. Skyler comes in so Dreamer sends both of the Hands outside.

Dreamer’s dive off the apron takes both of them down again, followed by Mickie hitting a big dive of her own. The Texas Cloverleaf is on but Hotch makes a quick save. It’s Dreamer getting taken down in the corner for a hip attack but he’s right back up with a cutter. Mickie comes back in to clean house, including the flapjack into the top rope Thesz press. The MickieDT finishes Hotch at 5:22.

Rating: C. Intergender wrestling can be tricky to pull off but they made it work well here. James is one of the most successful women’s wrestlers of all time and it isn’t too much to believe that she could beat one of Bully Ray’s lackeys. Dreamer vs. Ray is still a bit much to take as one of the bigger feuds in the company, but that is where everything seems to be heading.

Post match Bully Ray comes in and decks Dreamer, allowing Masha Slamovich to come in and take out Mickie.

Johnny Swinger, with Zicky Dice, asks Santino Marella for his next match as part of his path to 50 wins. Dirty Dango, the Deputy Director Of Authority, comes in to cut off a bribe attempt but Dice knows someone Swinger can beat.

Video on Rich Swann and how important it was to him to be World Champion. He didn’t get to have fans around, but he knows he inspired a lot of people. Then he lost to Kenny Omega when AEW worked with Impact. Josh Alexander wound up as champion so now Swann wants his belt back. He has his mojo back, so now he needs the title to go with it. This was a different look at Swann and the best thing in the build to the title match thus far.

Steph DeLander vs. Jordynne Grace

DeLander was Persia Pirotta in NXT and here, she promises to be everyone’s worst nightmare. DeLander starts fast by sending her to the apron but Grace powers her way out of trouble. With DeLander on the floor, Grace hits a dropkick through the ropes for two back inside. A quick shot lets DeLander have a breather though and we hit the chinlock.

Grace is right back up though and shrugs off a suplex, setting up the dead lift German suplex for two on DeLander. The Grace Driver is blocked so Grace sends her into the corner. DeLander grabs Snake Eyes into a big boot (seems to be an Undertaker fan), only to have Grace pop back up. The Grace Driver finishes DeLander at 5:02.

Rating: C. Another just ok match in a series of them tonight as DeLander got in a bunch but wound up losing to the bigger star. Grace is going to be back in the title picture sooner than later so giving her a win, even while breaking a sweat, is a good thing. That being said, DeLander was hardly a big star in NXT and I’m not sure how much value she has coming in here. Maybe she can prove herself, and she did start well here.

Matt Cardona is still mad about having to change in a closet so he asks for another dressing room. He gets another one….which is outside.

Josh Alexander respects Rich Swann and knows that Swann only lost one match on one night. Now Swann has his chance to get back but here is Kenny King to interrupt. King wants to know why he isn’t getting a title shot but Swann comes in to say King has to earn it. Swann punches him in the face and Alexander lets them go, only to have King back off.

Killer Kelly/Taylor Wilde vs. Death Dollz

Non-title and it’s Taya Valkyrie and Rosemary for the Dollz. Taya takes Kelly down to start and it’s off to Rosemary to hammer away with right hands. A fall away slam out of the corner sets up the Upside Down as Wilde is looking at her tarot cards on the apron. Wilde comes in and grabs a quick backbreaker to take Rosemary down for the first time.

A fisherman’s suplex gives Kelly two and it’s right back to Wilde for some forearms. Rosemary manages her half of a double clothesline, which is enough to bring Taya back in. Kelly manages to take her down again but Wilde finds the devil card. That means she won’t tag in, allowing a Road To Valhalla with an X Factor from Rosemary to finish Kelly at 6:03.

Rating: C+. Impact’s Knockouts division deserves a lot of credit as they have turned it into something rather entertaining most of the time. There is some depth here and Kelly and Wilde are coming along quite well. The Death Dollz need some challengers though and I’m not sure if there is a team around at the moment to fill that spot.

Post match it’s Father James Mitchell making his return and saying Rosemary hasn’t been paying proper respect to Mitchell’s boss/her father. Therefore, Mitchell is here with a hex….in the form of the Hex, Marti Belle/Allysin Kay (former NWA Women’s Tag Team Champions). The Dollz are laid out.

Eddie Edwards wants Shera to take out PCO as an act of friendship. Edwards seems to offer money as an extra incentive.

Kushida praises the Motor City Machine Guns for their success. The Bullet Club comes in and seems to want a title shot but get a six man tag at No Surrender, with Kenta being promised as their partner.

No Surrender #1 Contenders Qualifying Match: PCO vs. Shera

Raj Singh is here as PCO hammers on Shera to start. A punch to the throat sends Shera outside to set up the suicide flip dive as the fans approve of PCO. Singh’s distraction lets Shera get in a few shots of his own but PCO, busted open, sits up and looks a bit perturbed. PCO runs Shera over while screaming about Eddie Edwards. The PCOsault finishes Shera at 3:10.

Rating: C. The match was more or less a squash and I can appreciate it going that way. There is only so much of a reason to believe that Shera was anything resembling a threat to PCO so just let him run Shera over. PCO isn’t likely to win at No Surrender, but I could absolutely see him being a challenger of the month as a wild card.

Matt Cardona is back inside and finds Brian Myers in Joe Hendry’s dressing room, but apparently it is just for the shrimp. Some people come in singing Hendry’s song and Myers claps along with them. Myers: “It’s a catchy song.”

Frankie Kazarian tries to talk Sami Callihan out of joining the Design but Sami thinks Kazarian has the sickness. The Design comes in and Kazarian issues a challenge to Big Kon.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Matt Cardona

Hendry is defending and refers to Cardona as Edge’s b**** before the match. He knows the people believe in him though and that’s what will be going through his head during the match. Cardona hits Radio Silence at the bell for two and the kickout leaves him livid. They go outside with Hendry hammering away and sending him right back inside.

A spinning slam sets up a delayed suplex for two on Cardona, who needs a breather on the floor. Cardona sweeps the leg on the apron and grabs a neckbreaker on the outside as we take a break. Back with Cardona choking in the corner, setting up a neckbreaker for two. Hendry tries a suplex but gets reversed into another neckbreaker for another two. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Cardona switches into a guillotine.

That’s reversed with a suplex and they’re both down for a breather. Hendry makes the clothesline comeback, setting up the fall away slam to send Cardona flying. Cardona grabs the rope so a DDT can plant Hendry for two of his own. The Reboot is blocked and Hendry cutters him for two. Another Radio Silence gives Cardona another near fall so here is Brian Myers to throw in the belt. The distraction lets Myers hit the Roster Cut….on Cardona by mistake. Myers is sent outside and the Standing Ovation retains the title at 13:02.

Rating: B-. This got rolling near the end as Hendry can wrestle a good match when he is given the chance. They might have something with him as that charisma can’t be ignored. At the same time, Cardona’s transformation from total goof into solid heel (including the physical transformation) is incredibly impressive. He feels like a star so Hendry beating him is a good step forward.

Post match Moose comes in and goes after Hendry but spears Cardona by mistake. Hendry dispatches Moose and plays Cardona’s new song again to end the show. If that’s not it for Cardona around here, they missed a golden opportunity to send him off in an all time humiliating way.

Overall Rating: C+. Impact got back on their good side this week with a solid enough show that actually made me more interested in the World Title match at No Surrender. Other than that, the Cardona stuff was rather funny as he does a great job at getting humiliated. Fun show here and, as usual, they built towards the future, which is one of their strong suits these days.

Results
Brian Myers b. Dirty Dango – Roster Cut
Mickie James/Tommy Dreamer b. Good Hands – MickieDT to Hotch
Jordynne Grace b. Steph DeLander – Grace Driver
Death Dollz b. Killer Kelly/Taylor Wilde – Road To Valhalla/Facebuster combination to Kelly
PCO b. Shera – PCOsault
Joe Hendry b. Matt Cardona – Standing Ovation

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.