Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2002 (Original)

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2002
Date: August 25, 2002
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 14,797
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Jim Ross

Another year and more changes have occurred. The main one is simple: the Brand Split. Yes, Raw and Smackdown are now two separate shows etc. However, there is an Undisputed World Champion and his name is the Rock. He’s defending tonight against the greatest rookie sensation of all time: Brock Lesnar. No one had EVER seen anything like Brock and they likely never will. He took the company and the business by storm, winning the shot by beating RVD in the KOTR final.

There were even rumblings that he could actually win the title tonight but that could never happen. What a silly idea. Your other main event is the return of HBK, facing HHH in what is considered a classic. This show is considered to be a rival to Wrestlemania 17 as the greatest WWF PPV of all time, or at least of the new millennium. Now I watched this show a few months after it aired and I remember it being good but not great. Let’s see if this is as good as it’s built up to be.

Oh also, two months prior to this, a new branch of the National Wrestling Alliance debuted: NWA: TNA.

Oh it’s also WWE now.

No opening video this year. That kind of sucks.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

No real buildup here other than they don’t like each other. Given the amount of matches that they have to put together now, that’s the sacrifice that they had to make I suppose. Angle is wearing red and white stripes with a blue star, making him look like a barber pole. This was back when Rey’s knees weren’t falling apart yet and was close to what he was in WCW, which is to say, amazing. This is about as perfect of a pairing as you could want.

Rey is fast enough to wrestle with heavyweights, while Kurt is small enough and versatile enough to keep up with him. Going for Rey’s ankle makes sense as it could ground him and take away his best asset, so what’s not to like? My answer: nothing. This has been a very good match so far. The fans are very hot for this too so that’s always a perk. Rey keeps getting closer and closer here but Angle keeps getting up.

What you have to keep in mine here is that at the time, Rey wasn’t a huge star like he is now. He was a rookie that only had a handful of experience outside of the cruiserweight ranks. Think of him like a better Evan Bourne and think of Angle like Jericho. Imagine Bourne and Jericho opening a PPV and Bourne getting so close every time but just not being able to put Jericho away, but Jericho can’t win either. That’s where you get this match.

These guys are killing each other out there and it’s great, as neither can put the other away. Rey gets Angle on the floor but the referee won’t let him dive. Rey says screw it and jumps over the referee and lands on Angle in a sweet looking front flip (Do a barrel roll!).

619 (which in WCW wasn’t an attack but rather a fake out) and West Coast Pop get two as Rey doesn’t know what to do. Rey goes up top and flips forward to avoid Kurt and goes for a hurricanrana. Angle more or less jumps forward and grabs the ankle. He goes to the middle and just cranks on it until Rey taps.

Rating: A+. Awesome match. That’s the only way to describe this. These two just went out there and did it. This was back when Rey was relatively healthy before his knees just got destroyed. He’s still good now, but back then he was insane. Rey in WCW was the most fun I’ve ever had watching a wrestler.

If you think Bourne is good, Rey from back then would run circles around him. This was as close as Rey ever got to that in WWE, and it was great. Find this match and watch it as it’s absolutely great. Screw it, this gets an A+.

Stephanie is mad that Bischoff is in her office but she agrees to share it with him for the night, as she proves she just can’t act. She does have nice legs though.

Ross and Lawler are talking about the show, but for some reason they had them really far away from the ring back then. It made no sense to me and just looked odd.

Chris Jericho vs. Ric Flair

Again, no backstory. We get a clip from them fighting on Raw, including Flair breaking all of Fozzy’s equipment, but it’s never explained why they’re fighting in the first place. This was when Flair was still fairly mobile and not all old and disturbing looking. He was only 52 and still could be decent in the ring. Being in there with Jericho is going to help as Jericho can wrestle Flair’s style, and is smart enough to know how to wrestle a Flair match.

See, Flair is considered one of the best of all time because he knew what he did best and it worked with anyone. Flair had a formula, and all he had to do was plug his opponent into that formula for the majority of the match and then have the finish. This was exactly what he did throughout his career in WCW and it hardly ever failed. Yes, Flair’s matches are pretty standard, but they’re also pretty good. I mean his stuff from when he was in his prime mind you.

Go back and watch some of that stuff from the NWA in the mid to late 80s and tell me if you can find a truly bad match. Now not everything is going to be a classic of course, but he hardly ever had a truly bad match. On the rare occasions that he did, it was because the other guy wanted to run the style of the match, which traditionally meant Dusty Rhodes. Rhodes was notorious for insisting on having his style of match, which worked for him and him alone.

Go watch their Starrcade matches and you’ll see what I mean. It’s just not looking like a normal Flair match and it just isn’t that good. Granted, this could be because Dusty just was awful in the ring as he couldn’t go for more than 5 minutes without resting. He was lazy on a snapmare in that match. It’s one of the most basic moves in wrestling and he’s lazy with it.

Anyway, the point of this rant was that at the end of the day, the reason Flair’s stuff was bad near the end of his career was the matches stopped playing to his strengths and became based on what the other guy could do. Flair made a career out of taking a guy that was good and making him great by making him look great.

Look at Sting. He was a good wrestler, but his rivalry with Flair is where he got noticed, because Flair made him look great. In WWE, Vince didn’t let this happen and it caused Flair to look bad and the guys that were against Flair didn’t look as good as they could have.

Ok, rant over at least for now. Once I get going in those things I just can’t stop. For some reason we don’t have Flair’s normal music. It’s the weird imitation that he had back in 92. We’re a minute into this match and they’re already talking about how he beat Rock and Austin in one night. My goodness that is never going to leave. It’s a huge deal but good grief let it die. The WOOS are loud tonight.

This is a stat that blew me away. Jericho has been around for a LONG time right? He was 2 when Flair debuted. That’s just ridiculous. Flair has been wrestling almost as long as Jericho, a veteran at this point, had been alive. Jericho calls a spot to Flair in fairly obvious fashion. He just leans over and whispers it to him. It’s scary to think that Flair, at 52, has miles better cardio than most of the roster in their 20s and 30s. This match has been very physical to say the least.

There are so many little things that Flair does that show why he’s great. It’s not a bunch of big impressive moves with a few botches here or there. It’s a simple, basic style that has practically zero mistakes in it. In other words, it’s not about what he’s doing well. It’s about what he’s not doing wrong. Then the little things like getting the referee looking somewhere else to use a bunch of punches. He plays to the crowd well too.

How sad is it that so many people today would be clueless about how to do this? We get a cool sequence where Flair goes for the Boston Crab and Jericho gets a figure four, showing how fairly stupid it is to have finishers like that which almost anyone can do. That’s why I like the liontamer, the one with the knee in the back, more. No one else uses it. Apparently over time the amount of points that the figure four puts pressure on has gone from 5 in Gordon Solie’s days to 7 now.

In a brilliant move, Flair grabs the ropes and taps. The thing is, since the hold should be broken, the submission can’t count. That’s a very smart thing to do as it buys him a lot of time. Referee gets a thumb in the eye, or maybe a short knee (rep for the first person that gets what I’m talking about) allowing Flair to low blow Jericho and put on the figure four. Anyone think it’s a bit sexual looking when Flair bounces up and down while in it? Yeah I never thought that either. Jericho taps.

Rating: B. While not as good as the other match, this was still very solid. As good as Flair is though, I’m not sure I’m sold on him practically beating Jericho, who was world champion earlier in the year, clean. It was a very good match with Flair being the better of the two, but still, it just had me kind of wondering.

Promo for Hogan DVD.

Heyman is with Lesnar and talks about him ending Hogan’s career. Lesnar is a freaking tank.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Edge

Dang 3 matches and 6 world champions. Again, very limited backstory here as they just don’t have the time to do it. As awesome as Edge’s old music was, he desperately needs something more hardcore at this point. He’s rocking the glasses and the trench coat though so you can see the future Edge trying to get out. However, in less than 6 months he’d be out for over a year, so that kind of got put on hold.

Apparently Eddie is upset about Edge being popular and a sex symbol (really?). That’s almost creepy given who Edge would be married to on WWE TV. Just as I say that about Edge’s injury, he might have gotten hurt. He has a bit of a stinger according to Tazz, who would know something about having a Steve Borden. If he is hurt, Eddie doesn’t seem to care at all.

In case you didn’t know, Edge is a HUGE face here and way over with the crowd. Apparently it’s Edge’s shoulder….er neck…..maybe shoulder…..can the commentators make up their freaking minds?? Either way, Eddie is crushing him right now. Eddie is just going insane on Edge’s shoulder, so if nothing else we have a simple story going on that works really well. If nothing else, how can Edge spear someone if his shoulder is killing him without hurting himself really badly?

The main thing of this match is nothing more than Eddie working over the shoulder. Frog Splash misses but after a brief Edge comeback including the Impaler, Eddie hits a splash down onto the shoulder. Of course, because he’s the charismatic face though, Edge is able to spear Eddie without his arm falling off for the pin.

Rating: C+. The ending just ruined this for me. I got into Eddie’s shoulder work, but then when Edge more or less no sold it at the end, it was a total waste in my eyes. What’s the point in working an injury and taking away a guy’s finishing move if the other guy is just going to no sell it and use his move anyway? That was just bad and made me shake my head, which sucks as the match was pretty good.

Tag Titles: UnAmericans vs. Booker T/Goldust

Now this was a gimmick that I thought was very solid. Christian and Lance Storm represent the UnAmericans here, with Test being the third member of the trio. In short: they don’t like America. They were given the tag titles but very soon after this the gimmick was just completely dropped. I’ve never quite gotten why though. Either way, the odd thing here was that Booker and Goldust were also a team, yet they have absolutely nothing in common.

Hearing the announcers try to give them something in common really is quite funny. The fact that they’re both from Texas never really seemed to sink in. Either way, they were a fairly decent team, albeit they were far more comedic than serious, but Booker would be pushed towards the title picture soon and then put into a serious team with RVD, so all is good I suppose.

Anyway, on with the match. Hearing Lawler try desperately to make Booker and Goldust pro-America is rather interesting, as he compares them to the Great American Melting Pot without ever referring to it as such. The USA chants are really loud to say the least, so if nothing else the heels are drawing heat like they’re supposed to be. Ross’ repetition is nothing short of annoying.

Goldust hits a Bossman Slam as I try to come up with a connection between those two and it’s not working. We get a classic ref didn’t see the tag spot which needs to be done more often. It’s as simple of a way to draw heat as there is in a tag match. This crowd is HOT. Booker gets his own chant as he’s clearly the big star in this match. We knew he was a big deal, but they didn’t push him as such until March, when he was fed to HHH.

Oddly enough, HHH had everyone on the planet fed to him until tonight when he let Shawn, his old buddy, have a classic with him. It’s not like these jokes have no basis in reality, but I’ll save that rant for later…maybe. Anyway, Booker finally gets the hot tag to a huge pop. He throws chops at Christian so fast that the crowd can’t WOO fast enough. That’s actually pretty impressive.

Booker hits his missile dropkick which would have won him the world title in WCW but since this is the WWF and Christian is for some reason popular, he kicks out at two. It always amazes me how a finishing move can just lose its power over the course of a year. Booker spins up as Mark Madden gets another ego boost.

The faces dominate for a good while until Test runs out and kicks Booker’s head off to keep the titles for the heels. On replay, we see the referee looking right at Test leaving as Booker is left lying. Yeah that makes sense. The Smackdown tag titles would be debuted in about two months.

Rating: C-. This was about as cookie cutter of a match as you could have imagined. While it’s ok, it’s just ok. Booker and Goldust would eventually get the titles later on in January for all of two weeks. It wasn’t bad, but just not great.

Nidia does some stupid thing at the World, which is the new name for WWF New York.

Eric and Stephanie make some stupid sex jokes.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Benoit vs. RVD

This is cross promotional, so we have two announcers which is both kind of cool and kind of stupid. Benoit and Eddie have been jumping rosters lately, going from Raw where he won the title to Smackdown. The US Title on Smackdown was about a year away at this point, so there was only the midcard title on Smackdown. Van Dam kicks the freaking heck out of Benoit to start, so you know this is going to be physical to say the least.

This was a weird time for these two as Van Dam was kind of replacing Angle in the triad of the midcard. You always had Benoit and Jericho, but Angle was always a step ahead of those two, and eventually as he was phased up into the main event, Van Dam was thrown into the middle of the card more or less as an experiment and I’d say that it was a success. Frog splash misses and Benoit gets the crossface, which he locks on for about 30 seconds.

No tap though as we’re really just getting going. Over the course of the next 5 minutes or so, Benoit gets another two crossfaces on Van Dam who STILL doesn’t tap as we’re entering HBK at Mania 12 territories of not giving up. In a nice touch of comedy (in my eyes at least), Van Dam locks in the crossface, at least I think that’s what it is although he never was one for submission holds, on Benoit.

This lasts all of 4 seconds though as Benoit is the master of it so why wouldn’t he be able to get out of it? I’m not wild on the two matches with focus on the shoulder like this, but in this case it makes much more sense with Benoit’s finisher focusing on the shoulder. I guess with Eddie and Edge it made sense due to some psychology being thrown in, but I’m still not wild about it at all.

In something I never once remember seeing before, Van Dam’s hair tie comes undone and his hair is freely flowing. I’ve never seen that before and I really don’t like it. He looks almost like Tyler Reks with it like that, which works fine for the surfer, but it just doesn’t look right on Robbie V. I’m thinking I forgot a Ross joke here. That’s going to bother me now. The ending here is just not that great.

Benoit has a belly to back suplex countered as Van Dam rolls over onto him and lands in kind of a cross body/splash. In a very nice looking move, Van Dam looks down at Benoit from the top rope with Benoit’s feet pointing to him. He turns in the air and lands a Five Star for the pin and the title. Really not huge on that ending, as it’s just kind of there. There’s not a lot of drama as Van Dam just jumps up and hits the splash and pins him. However, a guy winning a title clean is a very refreshing thing to see. There was no interference or anything. Van Dam simply countered and hit his finishing move to get the pin. That’s both good and bad I guess, but the rest of the match was good so I’ll take it.

Rating: B. This was very intense and well done. It’s probably Van Dam’s biggest win of his career up to that point and is probably one of the biggest of his career even to this day, with the world title obviously being ahead of it. He beat Benoit, one of the best ever, clean. If that’s not validation of his ability at least on one night, I don’t know what is. Very good match though and worth checking out.

Stephanie, with those gorgeous legs showing very well, before laughing for no apparent reason at Bischoff bragging. Not sure what this led to, but it might have been the US Title. Actually that’s not it, as the IC Title would soon be unified with the world title, in one of the biggest head scratchers of all time. It would be revived about 8 months later when everyone realized how truly stupid it was, and THAT would bring about the US Title.

We’re getting ready for Test and the Undertaker. JR says a lot of people want to know who the UnAmericans are, why they’re here, and why they’re doing this. In short: Lance Storm, Christian and Test, they’re professional wrestlers and TNA was a baby at this time and since Vince had more or less created a monopoly there was nowhere else to work, and they’re Canadians that don’t like Americans. Why is that such a complicated thing to figure out?

The UnAmericans carry around an upside down American flag to symbolize how messed up America is. That’s either brilliant or really stupid. They keep saying they hate America, so the American wants to beat up Test. On a side note, William Regal would join them later on. Taker’s punches were called soup bones for no apparent reason around this time, as JR continues to get further and further away from this lovely little thing called reality.

Oh yeah we’re in the Tough Enough era here and Tough Enough 3 was going on. The winner of that was one John Hennigan. You may know him as John Morrison. The other winner was named Matt Cappotelli, and while you may not have heard of him, I was lucky enough to see him in OVW.

He was absolutely awesome and I can guarantee you of this: he would have been either as big a star as Morrison or far bigger. The guy had that X factor to him and you knew he would have been something very special. His retirement speech almost had me in tears. I wish I could find a copy of it.

Undertaker vs. Test

You won’t hear this, but JR says that Test has been living on nothing but potential forever. How true that is of so many workers today. This is part of the UnAmericans vs. everyone else so Taker busts out a hiptoss of all things as he dominates early. The big clothesline hits but Old School is blocked to let Test take over.

Test’s fairly generic big man offense takes over. This is rather slow paced and not very interesting. Taker gets a belly to belly to get out of most of the trouble but an elbow misses. They slug it out which of course Taker wins which lets him get a running DDT for two. Old School connects and the bigger man is in control.

Test’s big boot misses and a chokeslam gets two which is probably the high point of Test’s career. Christian and Storm run in which gets them nowhere. It does however allow Test to get his big boot for two as Test PANICS since the one solid move he knows did nothing at all. He grabs a chair but it gets kicked into his own ugly face and a Tombstone ends it. That was a rarity at this point so it was cool to see. He celebrates with the flag afterwards.

Rating: D. This wasn’t that good. It was certainly more about the angle than the match, and while there are occasions that I’ll make exceptions for that such as Hogan vs. Andre, this isn’t one of those occasions. It’s just not good as their styles were too similar and while Taker is good enough, Test just didn’t care at this point and it shows. Solid angle, bad match, as Test just wasn’t in Taker’s league, ever.

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Taker is just now leaving, so that was an extended celebration I guess.

We start the build for what I think (and yes it’s very debatable) was your real main event. Shawn hasn’t wrestled in over 1600 days. That’s a lot of sleepless nights for Becca. Lawler says that a lot of these people have never seen Shawn wrestle, which means that a lot of people have never heard of home video obviously, or Lawler thinks it’s 1940 and there’s no such thing as taping a match.

In case you’ve never heard it, here’s the basic build for this match. Shawn and HHH were in DX together as you likely know. However, Shawn got hurt and HHH took over DX and became the star that he is today. Now, in the Summer of 2002, Shawn came back for a night, unbeknownst to us, healthy and sober. That night, it seemed to be all about Shawn again, which was unfair to HHH who had actually had a more successful career as far as title reigns and time on top than Shawn had.

That night, Shawn came up with the idea of reforming DX (I want that man shot) and HHH went along with it, or at least he did in the beginning. They do the two words line, but then HHH kicks him and pedigrees him. You can tell this is serious because it goes into slow motion. HHH hits a very weird pedigree as he jumps way too high and it looks like Shawn was countering it with a backdrop.

Anyway, HHH says that Shawn used HHH to get to the top, so now HHH used Shawn to get to the top, which makes even less sense but whatever. Now this is the part of the storyline that I never understood. HHH is cutting the promo in the ring where he says all of that stuff. Ok, that’s fine. A guy gets his attention and says that something happened.

HHH bolts from the ring and goes off to find a bunch of guys around Shawn who is laid out on the ground bleeding and there’s a hole in the window of a car. HHH says he’ll find who did it and when he does, that person is a marked man. Shawn comes back a few weeks later for a satellite interview, and he has the footage from the security camera, and naturally it’s HHH. As I’ve said many times, what’s the point?

For one thing, why wouldn’t it have been HHH? He’s cutting a promo about how he can’t stand Shawn, and since Shawn has been back for all of 2 weeks, why wouldn’t it have been him? Seriously, who else was it supposed to have been? Why wouldn’t they have just shown it being him, maybe ending the show like that, and THEN have the interview where Shawn challenges him for Summerslam? HHH says that he did it to prove a point, which was that Shawn is vulnerable.

Ok, that’s all well and good, but WHY WOULD HE GO ON A FREAKING MANHUNT IF HE DID IT? That makes no sense! What’s the point in turning him heel one week, turning him face for two weeks, and THEN revealing him to be the mastermind for lack of a better term, thus turning him heel all over again? It’s just pure overkill and was absurd. ANYWAY, Shawn says that he’ll be completely recovered by Summerslam. So let me get this straight.

Shawn couldn’t get better from a broken back, which is something that could have paralyzed him, in four and a half years, but if you cut him on the head he’ll recover in less than a month? Are you telling me that all Shawn had to do to completely be healed was cut himself shaving? If that’s the case, Becca might have a fit. This match is non-sanctioned, which Bischoff says means that it never happens. HHH says the logical thing: Oh Eric, but it will happen.

See, that’s my issue with matches that never happen. YES THEY DID! When you erase something from the record books, people still remember the matches themselves. That’s why taking down banners for basketball games or erasing wins is freaking stupid. The games were played, and therefore we’re going to remember who won, who lost, by how much, and what kind of shoes they were wearing.

The match not only happened, it happened in a WWE ring, on a WWE PPV, had WWE commentators and had a WWE referee, but people know who freaking won it! The match DID happen, so what’s the point in saying it’s non-sanctioned? If it was non-sanctioned, then this would be happening in a parking lot somewhere instead of in front of 14,000 people. Since it’s not an official match, why is HHH in wrestling gear?

Does he wear that in his everyday life? Is there constantly a referee following him around to check and see if he wants to go for a pin? Does he think he’s Nighthawk and that he’s competing to become Champion of Wrestling (OCW joke for those of you that have NO clue what I mean)? Are you starting to see how stupid this really is? Just call it what it is: a WWE street fight. It sounds better, it looks better, and above all else: IT MAKES SENSE!!!

They get a full music video before the match here, which actually does show off how great of a match this could be. HHH’s line of “YOU CAN’T WRESTLE ANYMORE!” while as corny as it sounds, actually tells the whole story here in just four words.

That’s the sign of a good promo: it sums up everything simply, without having to use a big elaborate bunch of words to fill in time. All that being said though, the buildup had you actually believing that something special was coming, and for those of you that have seen it, you know that it is. For those of you that haven’t, be ready to enjoy.

HHH vs. HBK

Before I begin, one note that I’m likely to forget. In an interview that HHH gave about Shawn and this match in particular, he says that this was a 45 minute match. From what I’ve seen, it clocks in at about 27-30. That’s a far cry from 45 if my math is correct, but I digress. To say the pop for HBK’s music is massive would be like saying Hogan was a little over.

The flashbulbs are going off all over the place as this is actually a very epic moment. It’s not like Shawn was doing nothing when he left. He was wrestling in the main event at a major show as the world champion and he retained. It’s fairly obvious that he would have gotten at least a rematch with Austin at Backlash and likely have been champion again somewhere down the road. However, it’s likely that his addictions would have caused major problems.

Geez I need to stop these tangents. He gets the mega star treatment which he deserves, including pyro, confetti, etc. He’s actually looking like it’s a non-sanctioned fight, wearing an undershirt and jeans. His shirt says Philippians 4:13, which for you football geeks is what Tim Tebow has on his eye black in every games. For those of you that don’t know who that is, watch some real football, not that nonsense they play in Europe and find out.

For those of you that have no idea what it means, it’s a Bible verse that reads “For I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” That makes a lot of sense for this match. Usually I want the face to come out last and get the big pop, but here I think it’s better that Shawn came out first. Also, Lawler says that no one in history has had more charisma than Shawn.

Not sure about that King. I’m thinking of a guy in red and yellow. He posed a lot, kind of made wrestling what it is today. In an odd fact that you may not know, the man who wears red and yellow, despite many tries, has never once beaten Jerry Lawler by pinfall. They fought dozens of times, but Lawler never lost cleanly to him. SCREW these tangents!

HHH gets the booing to end all booing. You have to keep in mind: HHH is at about the level here that he’s at today, so it’s not like Shawn was coming back to fight Dolph Ziggler or someone like that. He was taking on one of the very best. Shawn is all calm here, even doing the lay on the rope like a hammock thing. I really like that actually, as it plays to Shawn’s laid back persona that he had when he was at his peak.

If he was all serious and angry that would have made sense too, but I think this actually works a bit better. Shawn starts fast, throwing his PERFECT towel in HHH’s face and punching him. Apparently this is due to his Texas pride. What in the world does Texas pride have to do with this? He jumped him. Isn’t that being a bit cowardly actually? Why am I trying to make sense of something JR said?

Shawn starts by throwing punches for the most part, but within two minutes he launches over the top rope with a plancha, followed by more punches. That’s a very smart idea actually. Shawn has been out of the ring for four and a half years. It’s not like he’s going to be the Shawn that was wrestling just before the injury. He’s going to have a lot of ring rust, so punching makes sense.

Also, it’s a good safety advertisement for kids and adults. Since this isn’t an actual match, it’s not actual wrestling right? Therefore, Shawn not doing a lot of wrestling moves is showing that people shouldn’t try this at home. Now it’s ok to punch someone’s head in, but don’t try to slam them. We get weapons brought in, namely the trashcan of death, as JR talks about Shawn’s son watching at home.

There’s a great parenting lesson: if you’re ever possibly walking into a match where you have little to no chance of winning and could be paralyzed because your pride got in the way of your thinking, make sure your kids are watching, because it could be your only chance to look good for them. Sweet Chin Music misses and HHH lands a backbreaker, which Shawn sells like death, opening the main psychology of this match, which was to be expected.

You know, you’d think that after four and a half years his back would be a bit better. Oh, Lawler has used vintage four times inside of 5 minutes. I wonder if that’s where Cole got it. You can almost see the Harley Race coming out of HHH already as he looks just pure evil. Ross says that WWE has nothing to do with this match as I am fighting from rehashing what I said earlier.

Chair is brought in and cracked over Shawn’s back, but since he has HEART, he can kick out of what would pin others, despite it being his weakest point. JR says HHH is 6’4 and a half and weighs 260, despite him being listed as 272 just 8 minutes ago. I feel like I’m watching a Captain Planet parody with all these heart references. DDT on a chair which should have crippled someone but he kicks out with ease, but he’s bleeding.

Lawler says this match may have been the biggest mistake of Shawn’s career. He hung out with Luna, so that’s a big negative there King. HHH gets the sledgehammer as Shawn fights him off. HHH goes for an abdominal stretch which I’m sure has Gorilla Monsoon complaining in his grave. HHH grabs the rope, which I’m still trying to figure out how that actually adds anything to the hold.

Earl Hebner yells at HHH about it and you can tell he means business because he has a mic on him, but keep in mind: this IS NOT a real match. Shawn gets crotched on the top rope as a little bit of Becca’s soul dies. Another chair shot to the back would normally end anyone else’s career, but SHAWN HAS HEART! I know I’ve made fun of a lot of this, but this match really has been good.

I’m rarely a person that can pick out specific things a guy does in a match, but even I can tell that HHH is a master heel. They do a spot where HHH sets up a chair and Shawn is side slammed through it. If it broke then it hurts horribly, and if it doesn’t break then it hurts like the 7th circle of torment. We get probably the 5th spot that would kill anyone else, but Shawn has….screw it even I’m getting tired of that joke.

JR says Shawn is limp. I’m sure Becca could fix that. Ok I’ll try to keep the Becca jokes to a minimum now. Shawn starts his comeback in his comeback match by countering the pedigree. The fans are white hot here, even 15 minutes into this. From out of nowhere, Shawn gets Sweet Chin Music into a chair but Shawn is spent, which makes sense. The psychology is definitely here, as it’s always nice to have guys that actually know how to work the mental side of a match as these two do. HHH is busted.

Ok, now this is just getting ridiculous. Shawn has had maybe 5 moves that would have ended any match with ease, including a DDT on a chair, and 5 minutes later he’s fine? Even Hulk Hogan thinks that’s a bit much to swallow from Shawn. Becca says…never mind. All of a sudden Shawn is limping around again, so I guess I can buy the adrenaline excuse. JR calls the chair shot a Jason Giambi like swing which makes me laugh. Of all the power hitters in history he picks him?

The commentators have a crazy idea: Shawn could win. I get that this is supposed to be his last hurrah, but is it that hard to believe? Ok yes it would have been at the time. The fans want tables, so HHH is put on the most famous one of all time: The Portuguese Announce Table! In a weird spot, Shawn pulls the shoe from one of the commentators, which Lawler says is a heel for a heel as I can’t believe he still has a job at this point.

You can say heel but you can’t say belt or strap? It’s ladder time. DAng why can’t it be wiggle time? HHH gets a solid shot right in the hand with it. In case you didn’t know, this is non-sanctioned. Did you know it’s non-sanctioned? I just want to make it clear that this is non-sanctioned. And last but not least, it’s non-sanctioned. HHH busts out a baseball slide as two things happen: he uses a new move so screw you HHH haters, and I am WAY past my record for talking about one match.

You can tell this is a big match as HHH goes up top. Shawn gets a weird float around sunset flip but he shoves himself off at two because the spot looks bad if HHH kicks out on his own. JR randomly throws in how evil HHH is. That is yet another example of why I love professional wrestling. Where else could someone try to cripple you but just a few years later you’re best friends again and fighting on PPV together?

That must have been one heck of a Christmas card that HHH sent him. “Hey man, sorry about that whole wanting you in a wheelchair thing and the attempted manslaughter. Next time we hit Waffle House, you can get a Coke on me.” Drop toehold into the stairs for HHH and we actually get a realistic looking impact. Why are tables such a big deal? It’s not like they’re that deadly.

Wouldn’t it actually break the fall a bit as you have less time in freefall? Shawn comes off with a splash from the top to the floor with a table, which is just cool looking no matter how long he’s been out. The holy crap chants have started, which is fine as this match is awesome. Correction: this match is greatness. There is a difference. The odd thing about that though is that this is really just an extended hardcore match with big names.

They’re hardly doing anything revolutionary, yet the match certainly is great. I think that goes to show just how awesome both of these guys are. They’re taking stuff that we’ve seen dozens of times before but by using storytelling and style, they’re making it look better than ever. Shawn lands the Screw You elbow and bounces up. The old school stomping on the mat clues HHH in to what’s coming and it’s countered into the Pedigree, but Shawn rolls him up to shock the world and win the match.

Normally I would have been for the Sweet Chin Music and the clean pin, but with that we can’t have what follows: HHH drilling him in the back with the hammer to become Satan incarnate. He then does it AGAIN to make Satan look like a baby bunny named Lucy.

Lawler is absolutely losing it in some of the best commentary I’ve ever seen. Ross sounds like any other heinous act, but Lawler is probably at his best ever here. The fans are chanting for HBK, but since he’s not Hulk Hogan, he can’t get up. Shawn is stretchered out as the fans are almost dead silent.

Rating: A+. Holy crap this was awesome. You have to remember, Shawn hadn’t done a freaking thing in nearly 5 years. This would be like Austin coming back and stealing the show and having one of the best matches of his life. Both guys were so on here that it’s not even funny.

Norcal says it’s in the top 5 matches of all time and I’m not sure I can disagree. I might not rank it that high, but dang it was fun. Easily one of the best I’ve ever seen and if you haven’t seen it before, turn the lights out and watch it right now. It’s certainly worth the 30 (not 45 HHH) minutes.

Ok, now I have to bring this up because it was the talk of the IWC around this time. As you know, HHH gets a LOT of criticism for never putting people over and while today that’s complete nonsense, those complaints started around this time and I think that at this time they were completely true. “But KB, he JUST put Shawn over.” Yes he did, but you have to remember that at this time no one, not even Vince himself thought that Shawn was coming back full time.

This was a one off performance and that was it. It’s no different than when Hogan came back and beat Orton and HBK. He had nothing to lose but he didn’t put them over as they needed. It’s no different here. HBK didn’t need to win here, given the circumstances at the time. Yes, HHH put someone over, but he put someone over that didn’t need it. Less than a month after this HHH would be awarded the WHC and after a brief Shawn run HHH would hold it for over 9 months.

In that time he beat everyone and beat them soundly. That right there is where he got the reputation for never putting anyone over, and I think those are valid claims. Prior to this he had won the title at Mania 18 and lost it to Hogan, who was just another nostalgia run like HBK was right here. In other words, for over a year and a half, HHH put over HBK, his best friend, and Hogan, the biggest star of all time.

Starting with the creation of the Undisputed Title in December of 2001 and ending with Wrestlemania 21 almost three and a half years later, the longest HHH wert without being world champion: just under four and a half months. Once the second title was created in September of this year or about 2 weeks after this show until Mania 21 (Batista and Cena winning the world titles): 5 months.

Both of these times he was feuding with HBK for the majority of the time. Therefore, I think there certainly was something to those claims back then that he was either playing politics or hogging the title while refusing to put anyone over, as he was either champion or feuding with HBK.

Since we had an amazing moment, we follow it with a bit that is supposed to be funny. This was the Get The F Out campaign because of those panda lovers.

JR and Lawler don’t think HHH is a very nice person. No valentine’s day cards for them.

Howard Finkel has something to say as we have entered the Twilight Zone. He says that he’s dedicated to the business and while MLB may be going on strike (they didn’t), the fans will always have the Fink. For no reason at all, Trish comes out for this. Apparently….they’ve been feuding?

Like I said in my Smackdown review, it’s kind of awesome hearing Fink’s voice being ticked off. Trish hits on him for some reason. Howard references a certain part of his body as my scars are scarred for life. Lillian is behind them and she beats up Fink and leaves with Trish. Aside from having two very hot women appear, this may have been the most pointless segment I’ve ever seen.

We see a promo package on the rise of Brock and how Rock has been training “specially” for this match, which means he’s getting in shape to film the Rundown.

WWF Title: Rock vs. Brock Lesnar

After all that, Tony Chimmel is announcing. Brock’s music is great and Heyman is in his element as the jerk agent. This match was Rock’s very last time being around any title period as he would make one last 3 month run in the spring, beating Hogan and Austin before putting Goldberg over and riding off into Hollywood, only appearing for Mania the next year.

Basically, this was to launch Brock as high up as they could in one match and I don’t think I’ve ever seen it done better. Rock was really just a trophy champion at this point, having no title matches and never really being the focus of the show at all. Since Austin was on hiatus at this point, Rock was all they had left as HHH was busy with HBK. They figured they would roll the dice on Brock and just see what happened.

There’s not a lot to say here other than Brock is destroying him. I mean this is almost an extended squash, with the fans all over Rock. It’s a smark crowd so I’m assuming they know Rock is gone after tonight. Either way, Rock is getting booed out of the building here and the fans LOVE Brock, who was turned face about three months later at Survivor Series. Actually it was a bit before, but it was official that night as Heyman turned on him, making Brock face by default.

Brock puts on a bearhug which I kid you not lasts nearly three minutes. Granted, it’s the hug that killed Hogan off, but DANG that’s a long time. After the nap I was taking ends with them finally doing something, they go to the floor and Lesnar is down. During this time, Heyman gets the worst Rock Bottom of all time through the table. Back in, Rock hits the Rock Bottom and Lesnar kicks out because that’s what monster heels do.

He hits his own Rock Bottom which Tazz calls, say it with me, the Brock Bottom, and yes, it is stupider than it sounds. They trade punches with Rock winning and going for the Elbow but Brock pops up to just take his head off with a clothesline. That was one of the hardest moves I’ve ever seen.

We get a great series of near finishers and counters, but Brock lands the F5 to completely shock the world and win the title as the fans go nuts. The ending is really fast with clichéd lines like the next big thing has arrived. I think they were pressed for time or something here because the show is over maybe 15 seconds after the pin without even a single replay.

Rating: C+. This again wasn’t about the wrestling but what it meant. As I said this was Brock’s big moment and they couldn’t have put him over any stronger if their lives depended on it. He dismantled Rock and made it look easy. Of course they would screw this up royally by putting him with Big Show who would injure him at a house show because he was too fat for Brock to throw around without hurting himself.

Scratch that. Brock could throw him around, but Show just sucked badly at this time. Either way they had no choice but to give Show the belt in an angle that was just horrid as it made Brock look pretty weak. Also, less than two weeks after this the Undisputed belt is made exclusive to Smackdown which I think is what Stephanie was laughing about earlier.

Anyway it leads to HHH being given (literally) the World Heavyweight Championship which Shawn would win at Survivor Series in the first Elimination Chamber. DAng I got off topic again. Anyway, Brock was awesome, Rock put him over and bailed, and Austin was long gone, so Brock is officially a big deal.

Overall Rating: A+. This show is awesome, but HHH/HBK should have gone on last, plain and simple. It was by far and away the bigger story and got more attention. Also, after that match, the fans weren’t spent but they weren’t as alive as they could have been for the title change.

Other than that, I don’t have any issue with this show. It’s solid all around with nothing bad on it at all. I’ve heard it compared to Mania 17 and while I don’t think it’s better or equal to it, it beats anything for second place at least off the top of my head. Highest recommendation all around here.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: Beast Mode Is Back And That’s How It Should Be

I’m not happy about it either but it’s the best idea.

 

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-beast-mode-back-thats/




Monday Night Raw – July 15, 2019: It’s Over 200x Longer

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 15, 2019
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Renee Young, Corey Graves

It’s time for the new era as Paul Heyman is in charge starting with this week and as luck would have it, we’re less than four weeks away from Summerslam. Tonight we’re going to find out who will be challenging Becky Lynch and Brock Lesnar at the pay per view, which should tell you where things are going. Let’s get to it.

Here are last night’s results if you need a recap.

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar to open things up, with Lesnar holding the title like the boom box (get Stephanie’s completely random video response ready). We look back at Lesnar cashing in last night before Heyman gives us a “we told you so”. On top of that he told us that Seth Rollins wouldn’t be defending the title at Summerslam either. Heyman says he has all the stroke around here right now and for tonight, he has made a battle royal for the #1 contendership. There will be ten cross branded superstars involved, including:

Seth Rollins

Randy Orton

Big E.

Cesaro

Braun Strowman

Rey Mysterio

Baron Corbin

Sami Zayn

Bobby Lashley

Roman Reigns

Heyman laughs at the idea of Rollins strolling into Philadelphia like Becky Lynch’s stud but walking out like a gelding (Heyman: “Google it. I ain’t here to educate you.”). Whoever wins will be destroyed and robbed of his manhood and that’s another spoiler. And just remember: you’re all Brock’s b******.

Ricochet/Usos vs. Robert Roode/Revival

2/3 falls because of course. Ricochet passes Brock and Heyman on the way to the ring and….nothing happens. Jimmy superkicks Dawson to start and Ricochet adds the Recoil (Codebreaker) into a standing shooting star press for the first fall at 25 seconds. Ricochet grabs a headscissors on Roode, followed by a dropkick to bring Jey in. A spinebuster gives Roode two and it’s back to Wilder, who misses an elbow.

Jimmy comes in and things speed way up but Dawson’s flapjack catches him for the pin to tie things up at 3:44. I’m not sure if that was supposed to be the Shatter Machine or if they’re just really pushing a flapjack. Back from a break with Dawson dropping a leg and a double catapult sending Jimmy throat first into the rope for two. A hiptoss cuts off the hot tag attempt so Jimmy enziguris his way to freedom and brings in Ricochet. The Glorious DDT is countered into the Recoil and the 630 finishes Roode at 10:14.

Rating: D. Again, I have so many questions about this whole 2/3 falls thing. Are we supposed to believe that they just laid there during the break? Why is there a break between the second and third fall but not the first and second? How bad do the Usos look if they couldn’t beat Dawson in ten minutes last night but Ricochet can do it in 25 seconds? I’m sure we’ll see more of this later too.

Post match it’s the Club coming out to gloat but Ricochet dives on Styles. The brawl is on with the villains getting the better of things off the numbers game.

Viking Raiders vs. Vinny Gruner/Jackson James

The Raiders promise to rain down carnage like their ancestors. Total dominance ensues with Ivar being driven into James in the corner. He pulls James up at two and it’s the German suplex/springboard clothesline to make it even worse. The Viking Experience is good for the pin at 1:20.

We look at Undertaker pinning Shane McMahon with the Tombstone last night.

Various people are laughing at Drew McIntyre for losing and Drew calls out Cedric Alexander for his joke last week. This might be more interesting if Drew hadn’t kicked his head off and pinned him in about two minutes. Drew promises to dismember and disembowel him. Drew: “I’m only joking buddy. That’s illegal.” He’ll humble him instead. That might be illegal as well if he’s an Iron Sheik fan.

Drew McIntyre vs. Cedric Alexander

Fallout from last week. Cedric tries to speed things up to start and kicks Drew to the floor, only to get suplexed into the corner back inside. Another suplex sets up the suplex throw for two but Drew goes up and gets dropkicked out of the air. Drew has had it with Cedric and pounds him down in the corner, followed by the reverse Alabama slam but Cedric rolls through for the huge upset at 3:20.

Rating: D+. I can go with this but at the same time, Drew takes yet ANOTHER hit because WWE probably has given him the bulletproof label. That’s the worst thing that can happen to him but it seems to be what Drew has at the moment. This probably isn’t over, but at least Cedric got a win in there. I could go for more of Drew getting some big wins though, or at least any big win.

We look back at Shinsuke Nakamura beating Finn Balor for the Intercontinental Title last night.

Balor promises to get back on track by going over Samoa Joe to start.

Joe says try it. I kind of like these quick gorilla position promos.

We look back at Heyman announcing the battle royal.

Roman Reigns says this is his week from the ESPYs to the Hobbes and Shaw premiere to winning last night and now he’s getting the Universal Title shot.

Finn Balor vs. Samoa Joe

Note that the recap and Reigns interview took place after Joe’s entrance. Do they really need to get the crowd ready for a match like that and then have them sit there? Joe takes him down by the wrist to start but Balor is back with a headlock takeover out of the corner. That’s reversed into a crucifix though and Balor is pinned at 1:24.

Post match Joe tries to choke Balor out but gets stomped in the chest. The Sling Blade sets up the Coup de Grace to get Balor’s heat back. The match was so short he probably didn’t even take his coat and shoes off. Balor poses but his music stops and the lights go off. We hear a beatdown taking place in the ring and the lights come back on to reveal….Bray Wyatt, in the Fiend mask, with Sister Abigail to Balor. Fans: “HOLY S***!”

That was a heck of a return, though I’m not going to be convinced that WWE is running with it until they actually give him some traction. The mask looked great and having a dual personality could be interesting. With Balor rumored to be taking some time off, having him be the first sacrifice to Wyatt could be great. It’s an awesome start, but Bray doesn’t have the track record to get me to sign off on it yet.

Drake Maverick and his wife check into a hotel (under the name 24/7 Champion) to consummate their marriage. His wife his fine with this and wants the most romantic room and expensive champagne. Maverick pays cash and even tips the desk clerk. The two of them leave and here’s R-Truth to bribe the clerk with a $1 bill. Truth asks if they have a guest under the name of Hornswoggle. Truth: “Lower case H, o-r-n-swoggle.”

The Street Profits watch and mock Maverick for being nervous. They also make their loud picks for the #1 contenders matches, with Dawkins still having a thing for Nikki Cross.

Zack Ryder vs. Mike Kanellis

Hang on as Maria wants to wrestle Zack herself. That’s not happening so Mike does it….and takes the Rough Ryder for the pin at 7 seconds. My goodness the hometown boy won a match.

Maria says that their unborn baby could have had a better chance than a loser like Mike.

The Club vs. Lucha House Party

Gran Metalik starts fast with the reverse Sling Blade getting two on Anderson. Gallows comes in and hammers away in the corner but here’s Ricochet to jump Styles for the no contest at 2:20. Actually never mind as it’s ANOTHER STUPID EXCUSE TO RESTART THE MATCH BECAUSE WE CAN’T JUST GO TO A FREAKING COMMERCIAL AROUND HERE ANYMORE!

Back with Dorado getting stomped in the corner until the Golden Rewind allows the hot tag to Kalisto. The rolling kick hits Anderson and it’s the springboard enziguri for two. A big flip dive takes Anderson down again but AJ breaks up a springboard. Kalisto tries it again but this time gets caught (mostly) in a spinebuster. The Boot of Doom hits Kalisto and the Calf Crusher is good for the tap at 8:14.

Rating: D+. Well thank goodness that they’ve come up with a bad solution to a problem that didn’t need to be fixed. This is like the Dusty Middle because there is no logical reason for it to happen (certainly not an explained one) and it’s just going to get worse as WWE continues to hammer this idea home.

We recap last night’s mixed tag and Lesnar cashing in.

Rollins says Lesnar doesn’t deserve the title and he’s possessed. Oh and Becky is tough and might be here tonight. He’ll fight anyone he has to in order to get his shot at Lesnar again.

We look back at Wyatt’s return.

Alexa Bliss vs. Natalya vs. Carmella vs. Naomi

Elimination rules and the winner gets the shot at Becky at Summerslam. Nikki Cross is here with Bliss and Becky comes limping out to watch. Bliss heads to the floor to start and Carmella’s rollup is broken up for no logical reason. Naomi and Natalya are left in the ring with an exchange of dropkicks, nipups and clotheslines. Carmella comes back in to steal two each, because people are often pinned by delayed covers off a clothesline. She does it again and the kickouts make her scream this time.

A hurricanrana out of the corner gives Carmella two on Naomi and the spinning headscissors sends Natalya into the corner. Natalya and Naomi get kicked in the face but Bliss runs in and steals the pin on Carmella at 3:03. Naomi takes a long time slamming Bliss and then dropkicks Natalya to the floor. Some kicks have Bliss in trouble in the corner as the fans really don’t seem interested here.

Bliss gets two off a clothesline and slaps her a few times for a bonus. We take a break with everyone down as the rules seem to be abandoned in the middle of the match. Back with all three circling each other until Natalya gets sent outside. Naomi hits a Blockbuster off the steps but Bliss jumps her from behind. Bliss takes Naomi back inside for a chinlock but gets caught in a Bubba Bomb into a rollup for two.

Natalya comes back in with the discus lariat to Naomi and another chinlock. There’s the surfboard to Naomi with Bliss coming in to cover Natalya for two at the same time. Naomi is back up to kick Natalya in the face but Bliss breaks up the split legged moonsault. A helicopter bomb hits Naomi but Bliss makes the save at two. Bliss grabs ANOTHER chinlock on Naomi, because this match needs a third chinlock at about the fifteen minute mark.

Naomi fights back up but gets knocked down for a fourth chinlock. Natalya makes the save but misses a charge into the middle buckle as the fans deem this awful. Naomi’s sunset flip is countered into a rollup to give Natalya the pin at 17:19 AND WE TAKE A BREAK!!! Back again with Bliss standing on the floor for a chat with Cross. Nikki grabs the mic and demands that the fans cheer for Bliss.

A right hand puts Natalya down and Insult to Injury gets two more. Natalya hits the belly to back drop and the stepover but Bliss avoids the basement dropkick. Fans: “LET’S GO CENA! CENA SUCKS!” Natalya follows her outside and hits a clothesline on Cross as the GOLDBERG chants start. Back in and the Sharpshooter makes Bliss tap at 23:26. That has to be some kind of a record.

Rating: F. I mean, what else could this be? The match was a nightmare and I can’t blame the fans for losing their minds like this. I’m really looking forward to finding out what the deal was here because there has to be some kind of a reason that they were left out there to die like this. That match was over 200x longer than Ryder vs. Kanellis.

Post match Natalya talks about what a difference a year makes but she’s ready to face her friend. Becky gets in the ring and says she’s learned that she’s better in war than in love. Natalya says that Becky must be a bad lover then “b****”. She promises to take the horseshoe out of Becky’s a** and win the title. Well that got harsh in a hurry.

Randy Orton wants to win the battle royal and even the score with Lesnar.

It’s time for MizTV with Dolph Ziggler as the guest. Ziggler requested to be on the show because he doesn’t like what Miz has turned into. Miz sucks up to WWE and does everything that he can but doesn’t even get booked on Extreme Rules. He’s out here wearing a shirt that says LONG ISLAND IS AWESOME but he’s not from Long Island. Or Hollywood for that matter. He’s from Cleveland and now he does whatever WWE tells him to do for the fame. Just like his wife. And the beating is on with Ziggler bailing. This is on the list of matches I never need to see again.

Maverick is spreading rose petals over his hotel room bed.

We look at Wyatt’s return again.

Back in the hotel room, Drake takes off his robs and reveals nothing but the belt and underwear. His wife gets ready but room service arrives. The bellboy reveals himself to be a referee though and Maverick frantically tries to find who is here. R-Truth pops out from the bottom of the cart and crossbodies Maverick for the pin and the title. Drake gives chase and the wife is left holding a pillow and screaming. Eh I was hoping for Truth in lingerie.

We look at Roman Reigns winning the first ever WWE ESPY.

Battle Royal

Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins, Big E., Sami Zayn, Cesaro, Braun Strowman, Rey Mysterio, Baron Corbin, Bobby Lashley, Randy Orton

The winner gets Lesnar at Summerslam, Lashley has taped ribs and Lesnar and Heyman are watching from the stage. It’s a brawl to start with Corbin going after Rollins and Strowman punching Lashley in the bad ribs. Cesaro starts running at everyone in the corner to take over, including the Swing to Rey. Another one to Big E. is broken up and Lashley dumps Cesaro for the first elimination. Strowman does the same to Lashley and it’s time for a Strowman vs. Big E. showdown.

Big E.’s running splash staggers Strowman and Big E. manages the Big Ending but walks into the RKO. Sami gets rid of Big E. but walks into the RKO. The 619 connects and Orton gets rid of Zayn. There’s an RKO to Reigns followed by another 619 but Reigns shrugs off both finishers and Superman Punches Orton through the ropes. Rey hits a springboard seated senton on Roman but gets tossed by Orton. We’re down to Corbin, Rollins, Reigns, Strowman and Orton with the latter on the floor.

Strowman puts Corbin in the ropes so Reigns can hit the apron dropkick. A superkick from Rollins is enough to get rid of Corbin and get us down to four. Reigns spears Rollins by mistake and Strowman puts Roman on the apron. It’s the Chris Benoit/Big Show elimination but Rollins knocks Reigns out as well. Rollins thinks he’s won and has to hang on when Orton comes back in to throw him to the apron as well. The hanging DDT brings Rollins back in and Orton stops to stare at Lesnar. The RKO is broken up with a superkick to the ribs and the Stomp is enough for Rollins to get the title shot at 7:47.

Rating: C-. Well that was fast (the women’s match probably took up too much time). This was going to be Rollins or Reigns winning and Seth is a much better pick than Roman in storyline terms. I don’t need to see him fight Lesnar again, but that is the kind of thing you have to expect here. I’d rather they go with this than rush what could be a big story in four weeks so at least it makes sense.

Post match, Heyman promises that Rollins is going to be conquered. Rollins tells Heyman to shut up and promises a repeat of Wrestlemania. Lesnar teases coming down for a fight to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. I’m not sure what to think of this one as the biggest problem here was how fast so many things went by. How many matches on here didn’t even make two minutes? Couple that with the INSANE women’s match getting over twenty minutes (close to half an hour counting entrances and post match stuff) and this wasn’t the best start to the Heyman era.

Other than Wyatt, nothing really jumped off the page, though it wasn’t a bad show. That one match just wrecked the show, but I’m not exactly thrilled with where things are going at moment. Then again, they have to rush for Summerslam so maybe it’s not that bad. I liked it more than some recent Raw’s, so it certainly could have been worse.

Results

Ricochet/Usos b. Revival/Robert Roode – 630 to Roode

Viking Raiders b. Jackson James/Vinny Gruner – Viking Experience to James

Cedric Alexander b. Drew McIntyre – Victory roll

Samoa Joe b. Finn Balor – Crucifix

Zack Ryder b. Mike Kanellis – Rough Ryder

The Club b. Lucha House Party – Calf Crusher to Kalisto

Natalya b. Alexa Bliss, Carmella and Naomi – Sharpshooter to Bliss

Seth Rollins won a battle royal last eliminating Randy Orton

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Main Event – June 6, 2019: The Dark Hole Of Last Week

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: June 6, 2019
Location: Frank Erwin Center, Austin, Texas
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Renee Young

I don’t know if it’s because Raw has been such a mess or because of how terrible Super ShowDown was, but I can’t remember much of anything from this week’s Raw or Smackdown. They’re just shows that happened and nothing is sticking out from them. Hopefully the recaps don’t make me want to pull out my hair. Again. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

EC3 vs. No Way Jose

Yes, EC3 can wrestle someone else for a change. A shoulder puts Jose down to start so he hits one of his own, followed by a dropkick. An airplane spin doesn’t get Jose very far as EC3 slips out and hits the forward DDT to take over. EC3 hits a hard clothesline for two and a neckbreaker is good for the same. They head up top but Jose shoves him down and hits a high crossbody, followed by a flapjack for two of his own. That earns him a crotching on top though and the 1%er finishes Jose at 5:30.

Rating: D. Just a match here, but at least EC3 got a win for a change. There isn’t much that can be done when you’re stuck on Main Event all the time but it’s better than facing Cedric Alexander over and over. I still don’t know what’s wrong with him in WWE’s eyes though and unfortunately I don’t think that’s changing anytime soon.

From Raw.

Here’s Seth Rollins for Lesnar’s cash in. Brock’s music plays but he doesn’t come out so Rollins calls him out again. Instead he gets Baron Corbin, who promises to crush Rollins’ dreams on Friday. The fight is on with Corbin getting caught with an enziguri to the floor. Rollins hits a suicide dive and there’s Lesnar’s music again. Corbin hits End of Days though and NOW it’s Lesnar with a chair. Lesnar kicks Rollins low and unloads with the chair, followed by a German suplex.

Heyman wants him to cash in but instead Lesnar throws Rollins outside. Lesnar hits an F5 on the floor (with Rollins bouncing), followed by more chair shots. Heyman starts swearing about how this is the time but Lesnar suplexes Rollins again. Lesnar: “FRIDAY!” And they leave with no cash in, come back to hit Rollins in the back with the briefcase and chair, and leave again with Lesnar doing the boom box thing with the briefcase. Rollins does a stretcher job. As long as this doesn’t lead to more Stephanie promos, I can live with this.

Post break Rollins is put in an ambulance with Becky Lynch going with him.

From Smackdown.

Here’s Roman Reigns for an opening chat but Shane McMahon cuts him off. After getting his traditional introduction, Shane talks about being a fine wine who gets better with age. He promises to hit Coast to Coast and then pin Reigns, or make him tap out for the first time in his career. The referee will tell Shane to make him let go of the triangle choke but he’s going to keep it on so Reigns’ eyes pop out as Shane is announced as the Best in the World.

Reigns tells him to shut up because he’ll powerbomb Shane through the mat at Super ShowDown. He’s tired of hearing about how great Shane is because Shane always needs help. Once Reigns gets done with Shane on Friday, he’ll beat Drew McIntyre at Stomping Grounds. As for right now though, the two of them are ready for Reigns. Cue the Revival to jump Reigns from behind, drawing out the Usos for the save in a preview for tonight’s six man tag. It looks like we’ll be having that match after the break.

It’s time for the Firefly Fun House with a very special episode. This time around, Bray wants to talk about….exercise. Wyatt introduces us to a new character: Huskus the Pig. Bray talks to him about his bad health habits but promises that one day, everyone will tell him that he’s a genius with the whole world in his hands. Then a Vince McMahon puppet with devil horns pops in and threatens to fire Huskus. This leads to a dance workout called the Muscle Man Dance, with Huskus, Vince and Bray all dancing. Now Huskus is in shape.

Natalya/Dana Brooke vs. Tamina/Sarah Logan

In lieu of the international show I guess. Natalya headlocks Logan down to start and it’s off to Brooke in the first ten seconds. The rapid fire tags continue with Logan bailing to the floor as we take a break. Back with Logan holding Natalya in a leglock, which is quickly broken up for the hot tag off to Brooke. That means a bulldog for two but Tamina superkicks Brooke down for the same. The running corner splash misses though and it’s an assisted Swanton to give Brooke the pin at 7:47.

Rating: D. I’m sure a lot of the match was cut by the break and I’m sure that whatever was cut wouldn’t have helped. This was four women being thrown out there for the sake of filling in a match and that’s rarely going to be a good idea. Another match that just exists, which happens on Main Event far too often.

Super ShowDown rundown.

From Raw.

Here’s Undertaker with five minutes left in the show to address Goldberg. Undertaker asks if you ever think about what happens when you face death every time. Do you choke at the stench of the souls that are already gone? Goldberg will find out on Friday and Undertaker doesn’t want the family. Undertaker wants the unstoppable icon GOLDBERG. If Goldberg brings anything less, their first match will be his last. When the reaper beckons, you answer his call, because Undertaker will claim his soul for all eternity. Goldberg is next. And we’re off the air less than a second after Undertaker finishes talking.

And from Smackdown.

Here’s Goldberg for the first time ever on Smackdown. He thanks the fans for their chants and says it’s time to get down to business. He’s been waiting over twenty years to face the Undertaker one on one. Last night he heard Undertaker say he didn’t want the family man Goldberg. That statement made a light go off in Goldberg’s head and he knows he wants the same Goldberg to face Undertaker as well.

Overall Rating: D. Ah yeah that’s why I didn’t remember this week: it was horrible. WWE is somehow getting even worse at the moment and a lot of that has to do with setting up Super ShowDown. What comes after that though? A show built around Super ShowDown rematches. Things need to change around here soon or it’s going to get even worse, if that’s possible.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Super ShowDown 2019: They Were So Close To Not Terrible

IMG Credit: WWE

Super ShowDown 2019
Date: June 7, 2019
Location: King Abdullah Sports City Stadium, Jeddah, Saudi Arabia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young

Yeah we’re back over here and no that’s not the most interesting thing in the world. It’s the third of what is likely to be twenty (geez) shows in the country that shall not be named and it feels even more like a show where they’re doing it because they have to. The Goldberg vs. Undertaker match feels like a big deal though and will likely headline the show. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Usos vs. Revival

Cole: “We are live here in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia!” Well at least they said it. Oh and it’s 94 degrees and feels 102 (34 to 39 for you Celsius fans) in the stadium. As a bonus, they have about ten minutes before the show so this is going to be short. Dawson gets backdropped to start and Wilder gets dropped over the top onto him for a bonus. The Usos hit some chops on the floor but Jimmy is taken down inside, setting up a running elbow to the back of the head.

The fans get behind the Usos, even as Jimmy gets caught in the chinlock. That’s broken up in short order and the hot tag brings in Jey for the house cleaning. The running Umaga attack in the corner rocks Dawson and a high crossbody gets two. Hang on though as Wilder distracts the referee, meaning Jey’s small package gets no count. Dawson hits a spinebuster for two but it’s time for the superkicks a go-go. Double superkicks finish Wilder at 7:11.

Rating: C-. Well it was nice while it lasted, but I guess it was more important to give the fans watching at home more hype videos for HHH vs. Randy Orton and Roman Reigns vs. Shane McMahon than let us have a longer match here. That isn’t sarcasm as those matches are more important, but this would have felt weak as a Raw match.

The opening video talks about what a grand international stage this is before going into a pretty standard recap of the top matches.

The pyro is back.

Raw World Title: Baron Corbin vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is defending and is very banged up after Brock Lesnar destroyed him on Raw. Speaking of Lesnar, he has promised to cash in, though he hasn’t said on whom. The fans are behind Rollins (with his VERY taped up ribs) so Corbin gets smart with a knee to the gut. Rollins is fine enough to kick him in the head, only to have a springboard broken up with a ribs first drop onto the top rope.

Corbin drops the ropes onto the top again for two and the kickouts earn the referee a stern lecture. We hit the waistlock (I can’t handle Corbin not using a chinlock), followed by a belly to back suplex for two. Rollins manages an enziguri for the double knockdown and it’s a Sling Blade to send Corbin outside. That means back to back suicide dives, followed by a sunset flip for two back inside.

Corbin bails to the floor again but this time the suicide dive is blocked with an uppercut. The near fall off Deep Six makes the frustration even worse so Corbin grabs a chair. Common sense sets in and Corbin drops it to the floor but he yells at the referee again. This time though the referee yells back and the stunned Corbin gets rolled up to retain Rollins’ title at 11:12.

Rating: C-. This felt like a pretty lame Raw main event with the banged up Rollins not being able to do much with Corbin. They followed the blueprint pretty much to the letter but that doesn’t mean it’s something that worked. At least Corbin didn’t win here, but you can practically guarantee that we’ll be seeing this again later this month. The ending was clever though.

Post match Corbin hits the End of Days on Rollins. Cue Lesnar and Paul Heyman with the briefcase but Heyman drops the briefcase on the way in, allowing Rollins to get in a low blow and some chair shots. Lesnar tries to use the briefcase to cover up but Rollins Stomps him onto the case (that looked good) to knock Brock cold. No cash in.

Post commercials, Lesnar is still leaving the ring, earning the Goodbye Song from some of the fans.

Intercontinental Title: Andrade vs. Finn Balor

Balor is defending and of course there’s no Zelina Vega. Balor is the Demon here, with a bunch of people in black surrounding him during his entrance. Andrade starts fast and tries a quick hammerlock DDT but Balor shoves him off. A missile dropkick gives Andrade two and we hit the Three Amigos. Andrade’s reverse tornado DDT gets two more and it’s off to the chinlock. Balor fights back and sends him outside for the big flip dive and it’s 1916 for two back inside.

Back in and Andrade kicks him in the face, which just makes Balor yell a lot. Andrade’s cartwheel kick to the head puts Balor in the corner so the running knees can get two. The double moonsault hits knees (that’s still one of the most contrived moves in WWE) and Balor nails the top rope double stomp to the back for two of his own.

Andrade kicks him in the face and the hammerlock DDT gets two (Andrade: “That’s my finish!”). Balor is right back with a powerbomb and the shotgun dropkick but Andrade breaks up the Coup de Grace. They both wind up on top and Balor hits a DDT to bring Andrade right back down. Now the Coup de Grace can retain the title at 11:28.

Rating: C+. Pretty nice match here, which is about all you can ask for in a spot like this. Above all else though, WWE’s ability to screw up something like the Demon astounds me. They make it sound like it’s two completely different people and call him the Demon over and over again. As usual, it’s a case of WWE acting like the fans need everything simplified for them and it’s getting annoying.

Miz says he’ll win the battle royal.

Jinder Mahal says he’ll win the battle royal and then get the 24/7 Title back.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Shane McMahon. Reigns debuted on the Superstar Shakeup edition of Smackdown and punched Vince McMahon. Shane vowed revenge because you don’t attack people’s fathers (add irony to the list of things they’re bad at these days) and has sent various lackeys after Reigns. Since it’s Shane though, he’s both the final boss and the one that should be easily destroyed at the same time.

Shane McMahon vs. Roman Reigns

Drew McIntyre is here with Shane and his early distraction lets Shane get in some cheap shots in the corner. Reigns misses a charge into the post and Shane sends him in again for a bonus. Some choking has Cole freaking out over everything Shane is allowed to get away with, just like he did last month in a cage. Thankfully Graves is right there to ask how you can get away with stuff in a cage match, with Cole backpedaling in a hurry.

Shane’s back elbow to the face gets two and we hit the chinlock. Reigns fights up but the Superman Punch is countered with a chop block. The triangle goes on until Reigns turns over and powerbombs his way to freedom for two. Reigns sends Shane to the floor and goes to get him, but has to Superman Punch McIntyre first.

Back in and Shane gets two off a spear but the Coast to Coast is broken up with a Superman Punch. I won’t even bother telling you that Shane kicked out, because of course he did. The spear is blocked by a kick to the face and the referee gets bumped. McIntyre hits the Claymore and Shane gets the pin at 9:25.

Rating: D. I burst out laughing and how can you not? It’s clear that they’re just trolling us at this point and flipping off the fans who are complaining about Shane. The thing to remember here is that Shane dominated the match, kicked out of the Superman Punch and blocked the spear. Shane wasn’t dead at the end and got dragged on top for the pin. This was another case of Shane being presented as the greatest thing in WWE and the fans can just deal with it. In his last major singles matches, he’s beaten Reigns, Miz twice and Dolph Ziggler, earning a trophy and the Tag Team Titles in between. How is he not next for Kofi?

Reigns looks….mildly annoyed.

Kofi Kingston talks about all the great things he’s gotten to do as champion. Tonight, he’s giving Dolph Ziggler a new memory: the time where Kingston beats him again. Xavier Woods is here too and still seems a bit forgotten, which seems to be some seeds being planted for he and Big E. turning on Kofi.

Lars Sullivan vs. Lucha House Party

This is Sullivan’s in-ring debut and it’s a handicap match. Kalisto starts for the team and gets swatted away without too much effort. It’s off to Dorado, who has to slip out of an over the shoulder backbreaker, earning himself a clothesline to the floor. Sullivan is bleeding from the mouth as Metalik comes in and hits some kicks but Kalisto gets knocked out of the air again.

A shot to the face knocks Sullivan out to the floor though and it’s time to maul Kalisto. Graves says the fans are in awe of him but they seem to be more in awe of the lines for the restrooms. Sullivan gets knocked off the top….and Kalisto and Dorado beat on him….for a DQ at 5:44.

Rating: F. This is more amazing than Shane beating Reigns. Why in the world was this not LARS SMASH??? I’m going to hope that this is some form of punishment for Sullivan and assume that they’re not THIS stupid, though it wouldn’t shock me if that was the case. It’s another case where I have to laugh, though at least Sullivan didn’t get pinned. Would it really have shocked you if he had?

Post match the Luchas beat him up even more until Sullivan fights up and cleans house to leave them laying.

We recap HHH vs. Randy Orton. They’ve been fighting on and off for about fifteen years and now they’re doing it again because Saudi Arabia.

Randy Orton vs. HHH

HHH gets the motorcycle entrance that we were all waiting to see again. The fans go from an NXT chant to a THIS IS AWESOME chant before they even lock up. Feeling out process to start with HHH taking him into the corner but getting taken down with a headlock takeover. The fight over a top wristlock gives us another standoff as we’re firmly in HHH’s long match formula here. A missed charge sends Orton shoulder first into the post, followed by some rams into various other metal objects.

Orton drops him onto the announcers’ table and sends HHH into the steps. Back in and some stomping sets up the chinlock, with Orton pulling him by the beard to stop a comeback bid. HHH fights up again and hits the jumping knee to the face. Neither finisher can hit and HHH blocks the hanging DDT, only to eat a dropkick to put him on the apron. The superplex is blocked and HHH clotheslines him in the back of the head for a double knockdown.

Orton’s powerslam gets two and there’s the hanging DDT, but the RKO is countered into the spinebuster. HHH covers three times in a row before going to a Crossface of all things. That’s broken up with a rope break and even that takes forever with no energy to it. The Pedigree attempt is countered into a backdrop and the RKO gets two.

Orton loads up the Punt, which Cole says is how he became known as the Legend Killer (no). That’s countered into the Pedigree for two more so Orton rolls to the floor. Orton gets dropped onto the announcers’ table to even the score and HHH does it again to go one up. Make it FOUR in a row and that table still won’t break. Back in and Orton hits the RKO for the pin at 25:39 (it’s as sudden as it sounds).

Rating: D. As usual with a big HHH match, it would have been good if you cut out ten minutes of laying around and stopped watching it in slow motion. It’s not like the match means anything in the long run so Orton winning is the right move, but I need a serious shot of caffeine after this marathon.

We look back at the 24/7 Title changes at the airport and in the air.

Baron Corbin rants about the referee costing him the title. Heads will roll.

Bobby Lashley vs. Braun Strowman

Lashley poses on a platform during his entrance so Strowman throws it off the stage. Lashley’s shoulder has no effect as Strowman just stares at him. The test of strength goes to Lashley off some knees to the ribs, followed by a leapfrog of all things. Strowman runs him over this time but misses a charge into the corner, allowing Lashley to hit a running powerslam for two.

Lashley grabs a chinlock for a bit until Strowman powers him up and sends things outside. That means the running shoulders around the ring and the powerslam (minus the running) for two back inside. It’s back to the floor with Lashley driving him into the barricade and hitting a suplex on the ramp. Back in and Strowman slams him off the top, followed by a pair of powerslams for the win at 8:23.

Rating: D+. It was a decent hoss fight and not much more than that but were you expecting anything else? This is one of those matches that anyone can understand, even if they’re not a wrestling fan. There was a firm ceiling of what they were going to be able to do and they hit it pretty squarely.

Ali says he’s going to win the battle royal so he can inspire people.

Samoa Joe says he’s going to win the battle royal.

We recap Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler, which is the latest instance of Ziggler saying that this time will be different and he’ll be awesome and all that stuff. It’s coming off like a filler feud and that has to be the case every now and then, but Ziggler still isn’t interesting no matter how many times they trot him out there.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler

Kingston is defending and has Woods in his corner. Ziggler has an American flag on his tights to make sure he’s a heel around here. Kofi misses an early Stinger Splash attempt and gets dropkicked for two. Some raking of the eyes makes Kofi yell a lot and Ziggler’s yelling gets two. Kofi fights out of a chinlock and whips Ziggler hard into the corner, meaning it’s time for some tromboning. The comeback is on, including the Boom Drop for no cover.

Ziggler goes to the ropes to avoid Trouble in Paradise and heads up top, only to get tossed off. A high crossbody is rolled through to give Ziggler two and it’s off to a pinfall reversal sequence. The SOS gets two and Kofi sends him outside for the big dive (with trombone) off the top. Ziggler sends Kofi into the steps and superkicks Woods before heading back inside. Trouble in Paradise misses but woods kicks Ziggler, setting up Trouble in Paradise to retain the title at 10:09.

Rating: C. Yeah this was every Ziggler match for the last few years and that’s all you could have expected. It was fine and short with the heat likely getting to them. Kofi retaining makes sense as the idea of Ziggler being champion might be too much even for WWE these days. Assuming no cash in, Kofi vs. Shane sounds like Summerslam to me.

In the back, Ziggler rants about how Kofi is a fraud because he had his friend helping him. He wants a rematch with no one interfering, perhaps in a steel cage. WE JUST DID THAT LAST MONTH!

We look back at the opening match with Corbin yelling at the referee and getting pinned, plus the resulting failed cash-in attempt.

Video on the fans being happy that WWE is here.

Battle Royal

Zack Ryder, Curt Hawkins, The Miz, Otis, Tucker, Tony Nese, Mansoor, Mojo Rawley, Matt Hardy, Jinder Mahal, No Way Jose, Sunil Singh, Sumir Singh, Karl Anderson, Luke Gallows, Elias, Samoa Joe, Buddy Murphy, Shinsuke Nakamura, Curtis Axel, Bo Dallas, Ali, Samoa Joe, Oney Lorcan, Cedric Alexander, Humberto Carrillo, Ivar, Erik, Akira Tozawa, Ricochet, Mike Kanellis, Heath Slater, EC3, Akam, Rezar, Xavier Woods, Robert Roode, Shelton Benjamin, Rowan, Brian Kendrick, Jimmy Uso, Jey Uso, Scott Dawson, Dash Wilder, Cesaro, Titus O’Neil, Eric Young, Drew Gulak, Sin Cara, Chad Gable

I think that’s everyone. Titus gets one of the special entrances and runs down but makes sure to stop for a funny bit. Elias plays himself to the ring and sings about how many losers there are in the match. Miz jumps out of the ring and attacks Elias as EC3 and the Singh Brothers are tossed early on. Anderson is out too, along with Eric Young and Carrillo. There go Gallows and Slater as they’re clearing the ring out early on.

Axel is out, followed by Lorcan, Dallas and Tozawa. Jose, Kendrick, Gulak and Nese are tossed as you can see the mat for the first time. We settle down to a three way staredown between Heavy Machinery, AOP and the Viking Raiders for a cool visual. The Vikings get rid of the AOP and Tucker as we see Titus hiding underneath the ring. He comes back in and starts cleaning house, including eliminating the Vikings by himself. Shelton knees Titus out and Xavier superkicks Murphy to the floor.

Matt gets rid of Shelton and Joe dumps both Hawkins and Ryder. Gable and Crews are out, followed by Ricochet getting rid of Jinder. Things settle down a lot with almost everyone being down at once. Otis runs over Nakamura and Rusev, setting up the Caterpillar to little reaction. Rowan dumps Otis and Woods but gets superkicked out by the Usos. The Revival gets rid of the Usos and Hardy does the same thing to the two of them.

Cesaro eliminates Matt and Swings Alexander, setting up a catapult for the elimination. Sin Cara hits La Mistica on Cesaro but takes Kinshasa from Nakamura. Cara is right back up though and kicks Nakamura out (seriously) but Rusev dumps him as well. Miz gets rid of Roode and hits the YES Kicks on Cesaro and Elias. Cesaro ducks one though and sends Miz to the apron so Elias can knee Miz out.

We’re down to Joe, Ali, Ricochet, Mansoor, Elias and Cesaro. Ricochet and Ali start double teaming Cesaro but Joe runs them both over. The two of them get together and eliminate Joe but Cesaro eliminates both of them. Mansoor gets rid of Cesaro and we’re down to Mansoor (the home country favorite) and Elias. Mansoor hits a superkick and backdrops Elias out for the win at 17:50.

Rating: D. Yeah fine. It’s been proven that these wins mean nothing so Mansoor winning is an acceptable choice. I’ll take it over some lunkhead winning it and going nowhere as a result. Let the fans have something special to cheer for so they can actually have some energy for a change.

Post match Mansoor looks straight ahead in shock before talking about what this means to him. A year ago he was here as a prospect and now he’s won the biggest match of his career. Nice moment actually.

We run down the Stomping Grounds card, with rematches of both World Title matches confirmed.

We recap the main event in a pretty cool video package with clips of Undertaker and Goldberg from over the years. It’s a great way of showcasing how these are two monsters and that’s exactly what they’re setting up here. This has been the best built thing on the show so hopefully it’s able to come close to the hype.

Goldberg vs. Undertaker

Another spear drops Undertaker for two and it’s time for the situp. Goldberg isn’t sure what to think of that one but he’s fine enough to escape the chokeslam. The kneebar goes on until a rope is grabbed and Goldberg misses a charge into the corner, busting himself open BAD. Half of Goldberg’s head is covered in blood in a few seconds and there’s Old School. The chokeslam plants Goldberg again and it’s a Tombstone for two (and not even two and a half).

Goldberg is up first for the double clothesline and they’re both down. Snake Eyes connects but the big boot is cut off with a spear. They botch the Jackhammer with Undertaker getting dropped on his head like a brainbuster for two. Goldberg tries a Tombstone but falls down, setting up a horrible chokeslam to give Undertaker the pin at 8:28.

Rating: D-. I wanted to say it wasn’t that bad but egads some of those botches were terrible. They sucked the life out of what they had here, though the early part of the match more than felt special. That being said, it was hot, Goldberg was bloody, and it was his first match in over two years. Goldberg looked really, really off after getting cut open too and factoring in the heat, this was a lot more understandable. It was very bad at the end, but it could have been WAY worse (like if it had gone 25 minutes or some nonsense like that).

Undertaker does not look happy to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. This could have been way, WAY worse and it’s miles ahead of the disaster that was Crown Jewel. There were some watchable matches earlier and, aside from the usual head scratch inducing booking choices in the middle, the last third mostly made sense. Now that being said, HHH vs. Orton is the latest edition of the cure for the common insomnia and Goldberg vs. Undertaker went sailing off a cliff after five minutes.

The problem here continues to be how unimportant these shows feel, and that’s before you even get to stuff like Sullivan winning by DQ, Shane beating Reigns, HHH’s marathon and hearing that both World Title matches are happening again in two weeks. This show is over and done with now so we can move on and forget it. It’s the middle of the three shows, but my goodness it was rough at times.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Baron Corbin – Rollup

Finn Balor b. Andrade – Coup de Grace

Shane McMahon b. Roman Reigns – Claymore from Drew McIntyre

Lars Sullivan b. Lucha House Party via DQ when Kalisto and Lince Dorado double teamed Sullivan

Randy Orton b. HHH – RKO

Braun Strowman b. Bobby Lashley – Powerslam

Kofi Kingston b. Dolph Ziggler – Trouble in Paradise

Mansoor won a battle royal last eliminating Elias

Undertaker b. Goldberg – Chokeslam

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Super ShowDown Preview

Yeah we have to go back to Saudi Arabia because WWE needs money to keep paying for all these people that they never actually use on TV. The card feels a little tied together and that’s not the best thing in the world. Some of the matches could be entertaining but the previous two shows have been horrendous at best and a disaster at worst. Maybe they can break the trend here but I’m not exactly optimistic. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Revival vs. Usos

You know, because this has no place on the main card. This story had cooled off a bit but suddenly the Revival are Shane McMahon’s lackeys, because that’s….actually I shouldn’t be complaining about that because it’s a major upgrade over the stuff they had been doing with the Usos. They also beat the Usos a few weeks back on Monday Night Raw, but I doubt WWE remembers or cares about something like that.

I’ll take the Usos to win here, likely setting up a rubber match at Stomping Grounds. These guys can put on a clinic if they’re given the time and I’ll certainly take this over some of the other stuff we’re likely to get. I could go for either of them winning, but it makes more sense for the Usos to go over here. That’s fine, as long as we stay from the utter nonsense that they did a few weeks back.

Lars Sullivan vs. Lucha House Party

On paper, this should be the easiest pick of the year but there is one problem. Would you put it past WWE to punish Sullivan by having him lose to three luchadors? I mean, it would be the dumbest thing they could do and it wouldn’t shock me to see it happen. Sullivan is one of the best prospects for a monster they’ve had in a little while and that’s not the kind of thing they need to waste in a match like this.

I’ll hope that sanity prevails here and that we get the Sullivan win that makes all the sense in the world. Sullivan should crush these three with no problem whatsoever but that isn’t always the way WWE likes to play these things. Hopefully Sullivan goes over and gets to move on to something more substantial (like picking a fight with Aleister Black) but for now, I’m just hoping WWE doesn’t get any “brilliant” ideas.

Intercontinental Title: Finn Balor(c) vs. Andrade

Yeah this is a thing in case you had forgotten about it. Andrade beat Balor back around the time of the Superstar Shakeup but thanks to Money in the Bank, we’re just now getting to the big title match. Neither has done anything significant in months so let’s have a title match. I’m not thrilled with this one but it’s a match with some potential.

I’ll take Andrade to win here, as Balor is the kind of guy who can be moved around the card without losing much steam. It’s not a good idea to have either of them lose and the title is the kiss of death at the moment, but it wouldn’t shock me to see a title change. That being said, these shows have a tendency to not do a lot of title changes in the first place, so maybe I’m overthinking things here. It’s not like either of them are going to benefit from having the title either, but I’ll go with Andrade for the sake of some history.

Bobby Lashley vs. Braun Strowman

This sounds good on paper but I’m not sure what kind of chemistry they’ll have together. It’s a power match and Strowman will be able to throw Lashley around like no one ever has, though I’m not sure how dominant Lashley is going to be able to look in return. At least there’s a simple idea here and it’s an actual wrestling match instead of the arm wrestling mess we had on Monday.

There’s no reason to have Lashley win here so I’ll take Strowman to go over and continue his dominance in the country. Given how behind the times Saudi Arabia tends to be, it makes sense to have Strowman get some momentum there since he’s a few months (if not years) removed from being an interesting character and anyone worth pushing.

Triple H vs. Randy Orton

Yeah this is a thing that’s being done because the shows need to have something “special”. In this case it’s a feud that was completely played out ten years ago and that no one has thought of since then. I’m not thrilled with seeing this and based on their segment on Monday, neither are Triple H and Orton.

I’ll go with Triple H to win here in what I’d assume is a feel good moment, though seeing the RKO finish him off wouldn’t be the biggest shock. The problem here is there is no reason to care about either guy winning the match because Triple H isn’t a wrestler anymore and Orton has absolutely nothing going on at the moment. It’s a match that doesn’t matter to either guy so I’ll take Triple H to give himself a win.

Roman Reigns vs. Shane McMahon

How are we here? I don’t even mean how are we having this match, but more importantly how are we in a place where McMahon winning is not out of the question? I know it isn’t likely to happen, but would McMahon pulling this off really shock you? Reigns winning is what makes the most sense here and yet I can’t get the slightest bit of confidence rolling for the idea.

For the sake of my own sanity, I’ll pick Reigns to win here but you know the feud isn’t going to end anytime soon. For some reason WWE has turned McMahon into the greatest thing since Sliced Bread #1 and it started last November in Saudi Arabia. Hopefully it ends here as well, but do you really think we’re getting away that easily? Reigns wins, and I say that with roughly 51% confidence.

Raw World Title: Seth Rollins(c) vs. Baron Corbin

And I thought my nightmares were over with the last match. This is another match that only WWE seems to think is interesting and odds are it’s going to get at least twenty minutes because Corbin needs twenty minutes. Rollins is coming in banged up thanks to Brock Lesnar, who is going to be lurking around with the Money In The Bank briefcase. Lesnar promised to cash in the briefcase here too so you know what that means.

I’ll take Rollins to overcome the odds and retain, likely setting up a rematch at Stomping Grounds with Corbin because WWE doesn’t know how rematches work these days either. Then again the fact that Corbin is already in the match should tell you everything you need to know about their intelligence in the first place. Rollins could use another big win and if you add up the three he’ll probably have to get over Corbin, he’s at least up to a medium.

SmackDown World Title: Kofi Kingston(c) vs. Dolph Ziggler

I’m getting such a headache with a ll these names that are in such big matches. Of all the people that WWE has available for this show, they decide to bring Ziggler out of mothballs for his latest “I’m totally different this time and I’ll win the big one for real!” story? You have the whole Wild Card thing at your disposal and you couldn’t find ANYONE better for this? Like, Andrade or Drew McIntyre or Rusev or Shinsuke Nakamura or the paper plate that Bo Dallas used at catering?

Not that it matters though as I fully expect Lesnar to cash in the briefcase here and become SmackDown World Champion. WWE is going to try as much as they can to boost the SmackDown Live ratings and since the problem can’t be everything else going on with that show, the blame must call directly on Kingston and Kingston alone. That being said, the title reign has already been longer than I would have bet on, but does it have to be Lesnar that takes it? I mean, odds are Reigns takes it back on the first FOX show, but egads I hope they can come up with something more original.

Fifty Man Battle Royal

Who is even in this thing? I know they’ve announced a few names but the biggest name is Miz, and that’s not exactly the top level star that you would pick as a winner. Battle royals can be all over the place as you never know what you might get in something like this. It might be a match where they get rid of everyone in a hurry, but at the same time there is a possibility that this is going to be crazy long with a bunch of waiting around until we get to the big names.

Since I don’t know who is in the thing, I’ll take…..let’s go with Big Show to win. I mean, it’s not like the match means anything at all anyway (as proven by the Greatest Royal Rumble) so go with someone who hasn’t meant anything in WWE in a long time. Hopefully this isn’t some 45 minute epic struggle because that’s about as far from what this show is going to need as you can get. Or it could be McMahon, because why not.

Goldberg vs. Undertaker

Yeah they’re old, yeah this would have been better twenty years ago and yeah it’s going to need to be about five minutes long, but sweet goodness that showdown they had at the end of SmackDown Live was great. This feels epic because it’s an actual dream match that could be really entertaining. What might not be so entertaining is seeing Undertaker’s bones come flying out of his body when Goldberg hits a spear. Then again with the money they’re getting for these things, I’m sure they can afford the medical bills.

I guess I’ll go with Undertaker here, but I can’t imagine either of them actually losing. Undertaker is far more likely to wrestle for the company again though and it would make more sense to have him get the win. Also can you imagine WWE letting a WCW wrestler get that big of a win over someone as important as Undertaker? The match is going to feel a lot better than it is, but I’ll take what little good I can get.

Overall Thoughts

I don’t want to watch this show and I don’t know many people who do. These shows are long, usually terrible and I just feel wrong for watching them. There is a good chance that it’s one of the worst shows of the year and very little on the show gets my attention. Hopefully they exceed my nonexistent expectations, but it’s not like they have any kind of a positive track record.

Oh and I don’t think they’ll have the teased women’s match. I’ll be stunned if they do and there’s a tiny chance they could, I just can’t picture them actually letting it happen.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – June 3, 2019: SHUT UP!

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 3, 2019
Location: Frank Erwin Center, Austin, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young

It’s time for another big show as we have a combination of the go home show for Super ShowDown and apparently a guaranteed Money in the Bank cash in. After last week with Brock Lesnar not knowing the rules of the briefcase, Stephanie McMahon was angry and that means we MUST do the cash in this week. Or another bait and switch. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s Roman Reigns for an opening chat but Shane McMahon cuts him off. After getting his traditional introduction, Shane talks about being a fine wine who gets better with age. He promises to hit Coast to Coast and then pin Reigns, or make him tap out for the first time in his career. The referee will tell Shane to make him let go of the triangle choke but he’s going to keep it on so Reigns’ eyes pop out as Shane is announced as the Best in the World.

Reigns tells him to shut up because he’ll powerbomb Shane through the mat at Super ShowDown. He’s tired of hearing about how great Shane is because Shane always needs help. Once Reigns gets done with Shane on Friday, he’ll beat Drew McIntyre at Stomping Grounds. As for right now though, the two of them are ready for Reigns. Cue the Revival to jump Reigns from behind, drawing out the Usos for the save in a preview for tonight’s six man tag. It looks like we’ll be having that match after the break.

Usos/Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre/Revival

Nine minutes into the show is better than the fifty five from last week. The Usos start fast with the stereo dives and we’re off to a break less than a minute in. Back with Jimmy coming in off a tag but getting caught by McIntyre, who starts pulling on the arm. Reigns breaks up a cover off a belly to belly but Dawson keeps Jimmy down in the corner.

The chinlock goes on until Jimmy powers up, only to have Wilder cut off the hot tag attempt. Back from a break with Reigns knocking McIntyre to the floor. Reigns goes after an interfering Shane though and eats a Claymore, leaving Jimmy to take the Shatter Machine on the floor. The Claymore finishes Jey at 14:22.

Rating: C. This was a little messy but I liked having a fast paced match to open the show instead of waiting for two and a half hours in. Having the show start with a twenty minute promo doesn’t help the show out whatsoever so this was a nice change of pace. Now don’t have Reigns or Shane show up for the rest of the show so we can let something fresh get in.

Post match Reigns takes a Shatter Machine, the Claymore and a spear from Shane.

Matthew McConaughey and Lance Armstrong are here.

It’s time for MizTV with Miz starting off with a McConaughey impression. He wastes no time in bringing out his guest for the week: Seth Rollins. Miz talks about Rollins facing Baron Corbin for the title at Super ShowDown but Brock Lesnar has promised to cash in Money in the Bank tonight. Seth says Miz is assuming that Lesnar will even show up tonight because Paul Heyman has a tendency to lie. True but STEPHANIE ordered it so it must be true.

Actually Rollins wants Lesnar to cash in so he can have a little relief, because he has a major title defense on Friday. No one likes Corbin but he is the #1 contender and Rollins needs to focus on stomping Corbin’s head into the mat. We cut to the back where Heyman and Lesnar arrive. Heyman says let’s cash it in and Lesnar hands him the briefcase before seriously walking towards the ring. They get to the entrance to the arena….and then walk down a hallway instead.

Here’s Lucha House Party for a match but Lars Sullivan comes out instead. The brawl is on until the luchadors manage to clear the ring.

Nikki Cross is upset so the IIconics mock her for teaming with Becky Lynch. Alexa Bliss comes in and asks if they have a Blooming Onion to eat somewhere. Billie calls Peyton her wifey and they’re ready to win a match tonight. Alexa: “Wow. That happened.” Alexa offers Cross coffee because she’s used to having no one like her. They seem to strike up a friendship.

Here’s Becky Lynch for a chat. She’s been doing some thinking and it’s time to make some changes. She was home for the first time in 63 days and it’s been a hectic schedule. Since then, she’s switched brands, won titles, made appearances and main evented Wrestlemania. Becky is content, but that’s the worst thing that can happen to a fighter like her. It makes them get passed over or beaten but that’s not happening.

That’s why she’s been woken up and it happened when Lacey Evans cost her the Smackdown Women’s Title. Becky swears revenge and here’s Lacey to cut her off. Lacey says Becky is like a dog chasing a car so Becky imitates her accent and promises to rip Lacey’s arm off. Lacey doesn’t like the idea of Becky representing the division but here’s Charlotte to interrupt.

Charlotte talks about taking the title from Becky, who asks where that title is now. Lacey calls Charlotte a daddy’s girl who needs attention so she’s out here like a peacock. Charlotte laughs it off by saying she’s more than halfway to breaking her dad’s record. On the other hand, Lacey has been here for about four minutes and all she’s done is make tea. Lacey sees the lack of titles for Charlotte at the moment so she can run along back to Smackdown. She decks Charlotte and it’s time for a match.

Lacey Evans vs. Charlotte

Charlotte goes straight at her as Becky watches from the floor. Lacey gets knocked next to Becky on the floor and it’s time for a breather. She gets back in for some power grappling until Charlotte sends her outside again and we take a break. Back with Charlotte stomping away in the corner and cutting Lacey off with some chops.

Charlotte knocks her to the apron but runs into a knee to the face, only to have Lacey miss a slingshot elbow (with Charlotte moving before Lacey ever jumped). The Figure Eight attempt is broken up and they collide in the middle of the ring for a double knockdown. Charlotte slowly gets up and Becky pulls her to the floor for the DQ at 10:12.

Rating: D+. Not much here and with Becky around on the floor, it was clear that she was going to be involved in the finish. I’m still not entirely sure why Lacey is getting this kind of a push aside from a lack of anyone else to get it, but she already lost to Becky once so it’s kind of hard to buy. At the same time, it’s getting harder and harder to care about Charlotte when they’re trying to get her to seventeen titles so fast. She hasn’t even been here four years yet so maybe they could slow down a bit?

Here’s the injured Rey Mysterio to vacate the US Title. After a quick talk about wrestling being in his blood and hoping his son will do the same, here’s Samoa Joe to cut Rey off before he can actually vacate the title. Joe says he heard the word champion and thought it was his cue. He knows what’s going on here: Rey is vacating the title because he knows Rey is scared and never actually beat him (the replays showed Joe’s shoulder was up). Rey says he’ll be back and vacates the title to Joe. That’s good for Joe, who jumps Rey and chokes him out before leaving with the title.

Cesaro is ready for Ricochet tonight because he’s not losing again.

Ricochet knows he can beat Cesaro and he’ll do it again.

And now, arm wrestling between Bobby Lashley and Braun Strowman. Lashley slaps him then pulls his hand out before losing the regular match. That’s not cool with Lashley, who throws powder in Strowman’s face and suplexes him.

We look at Jinder Mahal attacking R-Truth on a golf course and winning the 24/7 Title. Then R-Truth rolled him up as well and ran off, being dragged along by the golf cart.

Carmella is looking for R-Truth with Drake Maverick and EC3 following her, knowing she’ll lead them to the title.

Nikki Cross vs. Peyton Royce

Alexa Bliss is in Nikki’s corner. Nikki gets sent into the corner to start but Peyton comes right back with a right hand to take over. A double arm crank over the ropes has Nikki in more trouble and it’s off to another arm crank on the mat. Peyton sends her head first into the mat and starts pulling on the arm some more. Nikki finally fights up but misses a high crossbody as this boring match continues. Hang on though as Bliss has coffee delivered. Peyton kicks it out of her hand though and Billie shoves Bliss, in white pants, into the coffee. Nikki uses the distraction to hit the hanging swinging neckbreaker for the pin at 5:58.

Rating: D-. Sweet goodness what a waste of time. Did they really just do this for a sight gag of Bliss slipping into coffee? It’s one thing if it leads to a face turn that sticks, but I’m not sure I can imagine that actually happening. The match itself was a disaster but face bliss has some serious potential.

Post match Bliss is ticked and DDTs Peyton until Nikki pulls her off.

Here’s Seth Rollins for Lesnar’s cash in. Brock’s music plays but he doesn’t come out so Rollins calls him out again. Instead he gets Baron Corbin, who promises to crush Rollins’ dreams on Friday. The fight is on with Corbin getting caught with an enziguri to the floor. Rollins hits a suicide dive and there’s Lesnar’s music again. Corbin hits End of Days though and NOW it’s Lesnar with a chair. Lesnar kicks Rollins low and unloads with the chair, followed by a German suplex.

Heyman wants him to cash in but instead Lesnar throws Rollins outside. Lesnar hits an F5 on the floor (with Rollins bouncing), followed by more chair shots. Heyman starts swearing about how this is the time but Lesnar suplexes Rollins again. Lesnar: “FRIDAY!” And they leave with no cash in, come back to hit Rollins in the back with the briefcase and chair, and leave again with Lesnar doing the boom box thing with the briefcase. Rollins does a stretcher job. As long as this doesn’t lead to more Stephanie promos, I can live with this.

Post break Rollins is put in an ambulance with Becky Lynch going with him.

It’s time for the Firefly Fun House with a very special episode. This time around, Bray wants to talk about….exercise. Wyatt introduces us to a new character: Huskus the Pig. Bray talks to him about his bad health habits but promises that one day, everyone will tell him that he’s a genius with the whole world in his hands. Then a Vince McMahon puppet with devil horns pops in and threatens to fire Huskus. This leads to a dance workout called the Muscle Man Dance, with Huskus, Vince and Bray all dancing. Now Huskus is in shape.

We recap the opening match and post match beatdown.

Here’s HHH for a chat. After he hears the NXT chants, he says he’s here to talk about Randy Orton. Before Orton can say anything, HHH says he knows what this is about: building up interest and maybe even getting in a fight. After twenty years together, what else is there left to say though? Orton says he’s not Batista so this isn’t going to be so easy. HHH says fair enough and talks about their early history together.

It’s true that Orton is one of the best ever but a lot of people have tried to put HHH down. They’re all gone and he’s still here, so Orton won’t do it either. HHH goes to leave but Orton tells him to retrieve his balls from Stephanie’s purse before Friday. HHH likes the idea, but they’re so big and hard to get out. Orton wouldn’t know though because he doesn’t have any. See you in Jeddah. This was as good as they were going to get for a thrown together match.

Corbin is ready to leave….so he can celebrate facing a beaten up Seth Rollins on Friday.

Ricochet vs. Cesaro

Cesaro starts fast with the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and it’s time to slowly stomp at the ribs. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Ricochet pops up with a very spinning headscissors to send Cesaro outside. A barricade walk (or stumble) sets up another hurricanrana sets up a middle rope moonsault to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Ricochet fighting out of a chinlock but getting caught with the apron superplex. Ricochet heads to the floor and tries the same thing he did last week but gets blocked this time. Instead it’s a Code Red attempt, which is countered into the Swing. Cesaro uppercuts him for two and rolls through a springboard high crossbody for two. Ricochet gets the same off a rollup, followed by another rollup for the pin at 9:13.

Rating: C+. A few botches held this back and HAHA CESARO LOSES AGAIN. That’s all he does around here and I don’t know why anyone was expecting it to be anything different this time around. If only there was a title that was being vacated earlier tonight that could have been on the line here. Or say a title being vacated earlier in the night that the winner could have fought Samoa Joe for instead of just handing it to him. Oh well. Why go with something when you can go with nothing?

Post match Cesaro decks Ricochet again and goes under the ring for a ladder. For some reason he throws that away and finds a table….with R-Truth on it. Ok that actually got me. The chase is on but Cedric Alexander flip dives onto the mob for some reason, allowing R-Truth to get in the ring. Drake Maverick is ready for him but Carmella superkicks him down. The chase is on again.

Here’s Undertaker with five minutes left in the show to address Goldberg. Undertaker asks if you ever think about what happens when you face death every time. Do you choke at the stench of the souls that are already gone? Goldberg will find out on Friday and Undertaker doesn’t want the family. Undertaker wants the unstoppable icon GOLDBERG. If Goldberg brings anything less, their first match will be his last. When the reaper beckons, you answer his call, because Undertaker will claim his soul for all eternity. Goldberg is next. And we’re off the air less than a second after Undertaker finishes talking.

Overall Rating: D. Maybe I’m just getting numb to how terrible things are around here but this one wasn’t as terrible. They didn’t waste as much time getting to the first match but they certainly wasted time getting to everything else. The biggest problem here was they just spent SO much time talking. They really can’t trim a few minutes from some of those segments and let someone get in a five minute match so they can at least be on television for a change?

They could sum up some of those promos with a few lines from commentary but instead it’s just people standing there talking for seven or eight minutes at a time and get something a little more interesting on the show. At least some of the talking with the build towards Super ShowDown served a purpose, but it doesn’t make for a better show. This show still needs a completely fresh direction and that clearly wasn’t the case this week.

Results

Drew McIntyre/Revival b. Usos/Roman Reigns – Claymore to Jey

Charlotte b. Lacey Evans via DQ when Becky Lynch interfered

Nikki Cross b. Peyton Royce – Hanging swinging neckbreaker

Ricochet b. Cesaro – Rollup

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Main Event – May 30, 2019: Two For The Price Of Whatever Main Event Costs

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: May 30, 2019
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Renee Young, Byron Saxton

It’s back to the recap show and as usual, that could mean a little bit of anything. Main Event has become one of the more interesting shows around, though not for the good reasons. What makes this show so interesting is seeing how much of a mess they can turn a simple recap show into, which doesn’t bode well for this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Cedric Alexander vs. EC3

THIRD TIME IN A ROW BABY! Renee: “The Age of Alexander has come to Main Event!” When did it ever leave? EC3 wastes no time in chopping away in the corner, as there isn’t much need to feel someone out when you’ve fought them for two weeks. Cedric kicks him in the face and heads to the apron but a springboard is broken up. A whip into the corner sets up a flipping neckbreaker for two on Cedric and we hit the chinlock.

Cedric fights up and gets two off a sunset flip before a double clothesline gives us a double knockdown. Some right hands and an elbow to the face have EC3 in more trouble but the springboard Downward Spiral is blocked. EC3’s forward DDT gets two and he crotches Cedric on top. The top rope superplex gets two….and Cedric flips out of a belly to back suplex, setting up the Lumbar Check for the pin at 5:51.

Rating: C. The worst part here is how nice of a match they can put together after so much time spent facing each other. I still have no idea why EC3 is stuck here, but I have less of an idea why Cedric is stuck here. There had to be some reason to call him up and I can’t imagine it was to be in the opening match of Main Event week after week. How can that be the best they can do with him?

From Raw.

Here are Lesnar and Heyman again because the announcement didn’t come earlier. There’s a referee out there this time too because Heyman says it’s time to make his announcement. Before that can go anywhere, here’s Rollins to cut him off. Rollins says the title is his life as Lesnar laughs about the briefcase. Lesnar makes a mockery out of the title because he’s a joke. Seth stomped Lesnar at Wrestlemania and he can do it again right now.

This is Lesnar’s chance so Seth implores him to cash it in. Heyman reads the contract to the referee but Lesnar covers the mic after hearing that he has a year. Brock: “I GOT A YEAR???” And he slaps Heyman with the contract. Heyman: “DIDN’T YOU KNOW?” Lesnar: “NO!” Lesnar actually takes the mic and says screw Rollins before walking away. Lesnar hitting him with the contract was funny, making it the only entertaining thing on the show so far.

From Raw.

The Miz vs. Braun Strowman vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Baron Corbin

Elimination rules and the winner gets Rollins at Super ShowDown. It’s a brawl to start with Lashley and Strowman quickly clearing the ring to set up their big staredown. Lashley leapfrogs him but gets caught by the throat. That’s powered away but Strowman gets the grip back on his throat, only to have Corbin make the save. Miz comes back in and kicks Lashley and Corbin down, only to miss the big one of course.

Corbin belly to back suplexes Miz for two but a superplex attempt is broken up. Naturally that sets up the Tower of Doom with Strowman powerbombing everyone down and getting a bunch of two counts. Everyone heads outside with Lashley breaking up Strowman’s running shoulder around the ring. Strowman gets suplexed onto the ramp and we take a break. Back with all four still in and Miz getting double teamed this time around. Lashley chokes on the rope but Miz fights back, only to get caught in Deep Six for two.

Strowman is back in and hits the running splashes to Corbin and Lashley and it’s time to go outside. Lashley dives onto Strowman to take him out and they fight into the crowd. Corbin comes back in but gets sunset flipped to give Miz two. Miz fires off the kicks but charges into the End of Days for the pin at 16:14….which gives Corbin the win and the title shot because Strowman and Lashley were eliminated when they went into the crowd? Sure why not.

Rating: D+. They bring this stuff on themselves. WWE went out of their way to announce that this was a four way match and then mentioned there were no countouts or disqualifications. Apparently there is however an out of bounds rule, which has just never been mentioned until now. All you have to do to avoid this is not make it elimination rules, but apparently that’s too much to ask. I don’t understand this, but I’m sure the answer is “what difference does it make”.

We see Dolph Ziggler laying out Kofi Kingston on Smackdown and his post beatdown promo.

It’s time for the Firefly Fun House with Bray holding up a paper plate mask. He finds it hard to be brave sometimes but when he hides behind the mask, everything is ok. Abby asks why Bray is a sicko but Bray insists that it’s not true. Is Bray a doctor now? A light bulb literally goes off about his head and Bray is now in a doctor’s outfit so he can diagnose Abby as a bully. Abby doesn’t want to be stuck in this limbo anymore….so Bray breaks out a limbo pole and spider walks underneath it while saying his catchphrase.

Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins vs. Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson

Non-title, because the Raw Tag Team Titles are worthless. Ryder and Anderson start things off with Karl being taken into the corner so Ryder can hit a running knee to the chest. Hawkins comes in for and gets caught in the corner as the champs (Ryder and Hawkins, because you might need a reminder) are in trouble. Gallows adds some headbutts and we take a break with Ryder making the comeback as we seemed to have missed a good bit of the match.

The middle rope dropkick allows the hot tag to Hawkins for some middle rope dropkicks. The Michinoku Driver gets two on Anderson, who comes right back with a side slam for two of his own. Ryder is back in though, allowing Hawkins to hit an enziguri on Anderson. A Samoan drop/middle rope flipping neckbreaker finishes Anderson at 6:51.

Rating: D+. The Raw tag team division might be the greatest example of everything wrong with WWE right now. They put the titles on Hawkins and Ryder so the Wrestlemania fans would react. Then they wait two months and seem to forget that Hawkins and Ryder are champions, meaning the entire division, including the Viking Raiders, is completely forgotten. They don’t bother trying to do anything with the division or the titles, leaving fans wondering what the point is in even keeping the titles around.

Video on Randy Orton vs. HHH.

Roman Reigns/R-Truth vs. Elias/Drew McIntyre

Truth is banged up and the 24/7 Rules are suspended. Hang on as Elias, McIntyre and Shane jump Truth during his entrance. Reigns helps beat up Elias and McIntyre as Shane gets stared up the ramp. The bell rings and Shane offers a distraction so Elias can hammer away on Reigns in the corner. The neck crank has Reigns in early trouble until a Samoan drop breaks things up. Truth actually comes in so it’s a Glasgow Kiss to cut him off in a hurry. Drew whips him into the barricade and we take a break.

Back with Truth still in trouble as Elias and McIntyre take turns beating on him. Truth manages to send Drew outside though and the diving tag brings in Reigns for a nice reaction. The corner clotheslines and a big boot drop Elias as everything breaks down. The apron boot hits Elias but Reigns has to punch Shane in the face. Drew misses the Claymore on the distracted Reigns and it’s a spear to finish Elias at 10:44.

Rating: D+. Just a main event tag here and there wasn’t exactly a lot of doubt in how things were going to be finishing up. If nothing else though, it was nice to have Shane be the pesky manager he should be rather than getting in the ring to have these matches. He’s fine in that role, but for some reason WWE would rather have him be competitive in major matches. I’m sure there’s no connection to that and the lack of solid, top heels in the company.

Post match Reigns has an idea and spears Elias again so Truth can win the title back. I mean, it is beneath Reigns to win it after all.

Overall Rating: D. This show accomplished two things: show how worthless the Tag Team Titles are and reminding me just how bad Raw was this week. WWE is a mess at the moment and it feels like there is too much going on at once. However, WWE seems to think that the solution is a comedy title for lower level wrestlers and more Roman Reigns, Brock Lesnar and Baron Corbin. It’s going to take some time to get out of this, and I’m not sure how much longer fans are going to wait for them.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – May 27, 2019: A Memorial Day Nightmare

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 27, 2019
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young

This is going to be an interesting show but that might be the case without the show actually being interesting. It’s the first show after the rather great Double Or Nothing event, meaning WWE might be trying to show that they still have it. At the same time though it’s also Memorial Day, meaning the effort might not be there. On the third hand, there are only two shows left before Super ShowDown and some building could be useful. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the traditional long Memorial Day video.

Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar are here for the cash-in announcement, despite a four way #1 contenders match being announced for tonight.

Here’s Kofi Kingston to open things up, seemingly fine six days after the big beating from Dolph Ziggler, which we see in video form. Kofi is here because he’s a fighting champion but also because he wants to deal with Mr. Money In The Bank. He’ll fight anyone anytime and he wants Brock to cash in right here right now.

Instead he gets Seth Rollins (Seth: “I know I’m not Brock Lesnar. I’m better.”) to say he wants to know what Lesnar is doing with the briefcase too. The champs are here so get Lesnar out here right now. This brings out Lesnar, who has different music because he’s actually turned the briefcase into a boom box, complete with speakers and DANCING.

The box starts playing New Day music and Kofi is in but it switches over to Rollins’ music, complete with Heyman playing air guitar. Rollins leaves and the music stops with Heyman accusing Seth of ruining the Brock Party. Heyman and Lesnar leave and Ziggler comes out to jump Kofi, including a Zig Zag on the ramp. Xavier Woods runs out for the save as we’re already three fours of the way done with Wild Card entries tonight.

Post break Kofi is being helped out and Ziggler jumps him again, triggering another brawl with Woods. They fight into the crowd with Woods getting the better of it and throwing a trashcan at Ziggler. It heads back to ringside with Ziggler getting in some chair shots on the floor and in the ring. The chair is wrapped around Woods’ head but Kofi runs out with his own chair for the save.

Back from another break with Kofi and Woods still in the ring and Ziggler coming back out and saying he wants Kofi to enjoy the time he has left. Kofi is the best WWE Champion Ziggler can remember but it still should have been him. For years, Kofi has had two friends to help his popularity, but what happens when he loses the title? At Super ShowDown, Ziggler is taking the title.

There’s a Memorial Day party in the back with most of the lower card around and the Usos have brought in a DJ. First up though, Happy Birthday Natalya! Everybody is invited, aside from the Revival of course. More on this later I’m sure.

Shane McMahon comes out for a match….and then changes his mind.

Video on Randy Orton vs. HHH.

Here are Shane and Drew McIntyre (who were in the ring before the video played) to talk about the history of the McMahon Family vs. the Samoan dynasty, which has been going on since before either Roman Reigns or Shane were alive. It all comes down to respect though, which is not something that Reigns has shown.

Shane talks about the members of the Samoan wrestling family, but the Wild Samoans might have been the most insane of them all. Now Shane isn’t going to run down the Wild Samoans, but the reality is that Vince was always there to clean up their mistakes. Tonight, he’s facing a member of the Samoan dynasty, which seems to be an official name.

Lance Anoa’i vs. Shane McMahon

Lance is a real member of the Anoa’i Family. Hang on though as Drew pulls Lance to the floor and drives him into the barricade and steps. Shane says that’s enough and Lance is thrown inside so the real beating can begin, with the first match of the night starting at 8:52. The fans declare this awful as Lance makes the comeback and hits a dropkick but the superkick is countered by an elbow to the face. The triangle choke makes Lance tap at 1:36.

Post match Drew knocks Lance out again and the choke goes on again, with Shane saying Lance screams like Sika. This finally draws out Roman Reigns, who gets his hands on Shane until Drew gets him out of trouble. Shane and Drew run through the back as Reigns helps Lance up.

Here are Lesnar and Heyman again because the announcement didn’t come earlier. There’s a referee out there this time too because Heyman says it’s time to make his announcement. Before that can go anywhere, here’s Rollins to cut him off. Rollins says the title is his life as Lesnar laughs about the briefcase. Lesnar makes a mockery out of the title because he’s a joke. Seth stomped Lesnar at Wrestlemania and he can do it again right now.

This is Lesnar’s chance so Seth implores him to cash it in. Heyman reads the contract to the referee but Lesnar covers the mic after hearing that he has a year. Brock: “I GOT A YEAR???” And he slaps Heyman with the contract. Heyman: “DIDN’T YOU KNOW?” Lesnar: “NO!” Lesnar actually takes the mic and says screw Rollins before walking away. Lesnar hitting him with the contract was funny, making it the only entetaining thing on the show so far.

As Rollins leaves, Carmella and R-Truth run in with the 24/7 Title and it’s time for the rollups as the mob can’t get out of their own way. The running continues.

AJ Styles, who is too injured to be in the four way #1 contenders match, has been replaced by Baron Corbin. That’s not cool with AJ, who injured his back at Money in the Bank. He isn’t taking anything away from Seth Rollins who won the match fair and square but AJ wanted one more shot at the title. Corbin comes in and hits Styles in the face for a knockout.

Becky Lynch/Nikki Cross vs. IIconics

Non-title because the IIconics never defend the things. Nikki gets all fired up to fight both IIconics so Peyton headlocks her down. A rollup gives Nikki two and it’s off to Billie as a lot of shouting ensues. Nikki crossbodies both of them from the apron and we take a break. Back with Kay kicking Becky’s hand away from a tag and missing a charge at Nikki in the corner.

Peyton can’t stop the hot tag to Becky so house can be cleaned. Becky’s middle rope legdrop gets two with Kay making the save, setting up the bulldog onto Billie’s knee for two. Peyton gets out of the Disarm-Her so it’s a Rock Bottom (the Man Handle Slam) to give Becky the pin at 9:52.

Rating: C-. At this point I’ll take a match that gets cut in half over everything else we’ve been saying. The Women’s Tag Team Titles already need to be retired as they’ve become less interesting than the 24/7 Title in just a few months. At least Becky and Nikki didn’t take the fall, though I doubt this leads anywhere.

Post match Lacey Evans comes out for her old school cameo.

Back to the party with Naomi hugging Tamina when the Revival comes up to argue with the Usos. Naomi invited them to end this and there’s a tense handshake, with Naomi suggesting hot dogs.

Ricochet vs. Cesaro

Rematch from last week. Ricochet starts fast with a hurricanrana but a knee to the ribs cuts him off. An enziguri sends Cesaro tot he floor and it’s the big twisting flip dive to take us to a break. Back with Cesaro hitting a choke suplex for two, followed by a double stomp for two. Ricochet flips out of the corner and nails a superkick that seems to open Cesaro’s sinuses. A springboard clothesline into a standing shooting star press gets two but Cesaro uppercuts him on top.

Ricochet knees his way out of a superplex attempt though but the 630 misses. One heck of a running uppercut sends Ricochet bouncing out of the corner but the Neutralizer is countered. Cesaro sends him to the floor but makes the mistake of laying against the ropes, allowing Ricochet to flip forward from the floor to the apron into a hurricanrana driver (as in he basically got a running start and did a 450 from the floor into the ring) for the pin at 9:49.

Rating: C+. If I had a pen in my hand for that finish, I’d have thrown it in the air and been at a loss. That’s the kind of video game special move that some programmer comes up with because a normal human shouldn’t be able to do it. Ricochet is scary athletic and I’m glad he got to win a match for a change.

The Usos and the Revival play cornhole.

Miz talks about how he used to think he deserved to be Universal Champion but things have changed since then. Now he wants to earn it, and that’s going to be awesome.

Braun Strowman promises to give everyone these hands. Oh and congratulations to Miz for expecting another baby girl.

The Miz vs. Braun Strowman vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Baron Corbin

Elimination rules and the winner gets Rollins at Super ShowDown. It’s a brawl to start with Lashley and Strowman quickly clearing the ring to set up their big staredown. Lashley leapfrogs him but gets caught by the throat. That’s powered away but Strowman gets the grip back on his throat, only to have Corbin make the save. Miz comes back in and kicks Lashley and Corbin down, only to miss the big one of course.

Corbin belly to back suplexes Miz for two but a superplex attempt is broken up. Naturally that sets up the Tower of Doom with Strowman powerbombing everyone down and getting a bunch of two counts. Everyone heads outside with Lashley breaking up Strowman’s running shoulder around the ring. Strowman gets suplexed onto the ramp and we take a break. Back with all four still in and Miz getting double teamed this time around. Lashley chokes on the rope but Miz fights back, only to get caught in Deep Six for two.

Strowman is back in and hits the running splashes to Corbin and Lashley and it’s time to go outside. Lashley dives onto Strowman to take him out and they fight into the crowd. Corbin comes back in but gets sunset flipped to give Miz two. Miz fires off the kicks but charges into the End of Days for the pin at 16:14….which gives Corbin the win and the title shot because Strowman and Lashley were eliminated when they went into the crowd? Sure why not.

Rating: D+. They bring this stuff on themselves. WWE went out of their way to announce that this was a four way match and then mentioned there were no countouts or disqualifications. Apparently there is however an out of bounds rule, which has just never been mentioned until now. All you have to do to avoid this is not make it elimination rules, but apparently that’s too much to ask. I don’t understand this, but I’m sure the answer is “what difference does it make”.

Scott Dawson cheats at cornhole but here’s R-Truth before anything else can happen. Rollups ensue and the mob chases him off.

It’s time for the Firefly Fun House with Bray holding up a paper plate mask. He finds it hard to be brave sometimes but when he hides behind the mask, everything is ok. Abby asks why Bray is a sicko but Bray insists that it’s not true. Is Bray a doctor now? A light bulb literally goes off about his head and Bray is now in a doctor’s outfit so he can diagnose Abby as a bully. Abby doesn’t want to be stuck in this limbo anymore….so Bray breaks out a limbo pole and spider walks underneath it while saying his catchphrase.

And now, here’s Sami Zayn to sit in an electric chair to answer questions from the audience. First up: when is your retirement date. Sami asks if the fan’s parents are related. A kid asks if Sami misses the Ginger Snaps from Mixed Match Challenge. Sami says the kid’s parents have failed at their jobs.

Third: how does it feel when Braun Strowman destroys you? Sami threatens to beat up the fan but since we’re in America, he won’t do it for fear of getting sued. Sami is amazed that the questions are this stupid and laughs off a question about not winning the Universal Championship. He could win the title any time he wants but he’s not interested in doing so right now. Sami: “You could have asked me about anything. You could have asked me about AEW.” As the fans gasp, here’s Seth Rollins again and let’s have an impromptu main event.

Seth Rollins vs. Sami Zayn

Non-title. They don’t waste time in getting to the floor with Rollins sending him into the barricade to take over. Back in and Rollins gets distracted for a second, allowing Sami to punch him in the face. A drop down onto Rollins’ back sets up the chinlock with forearms to Rollins’ jaw. Some rapid fire kicks to the face keep Rollins rocked and a clothesline gets two.

Rollins gets in a jumping knee to the back to send Sami outside but Sami posts him as we take a break. Back with Rollins escaping a suplex and nailing a superkick for a double knockdown. The Sling Blade connects and Sami bails to the floor, meaning it’s time for the suicide dives. Seth tweaks his knee on the second though and Sami goes after it, including a Figure Four.

Rollins turns it over for the break but the damage has been done. The knee is fine enough for an enziguri but the ripcord knee is countered into a Blue Thunder Bomb for two. Sami’s superplex attempt is broken up and Seth tries the frog splash, which hits raised knees. Rollins pops back up and hits a quick Stomp but can’t follow up. A second stomp is good for the pin at 20:13.

Rating: B. That’s one of the better matches from both guys in a nice little while but after the show that came before it, it’s not like that means much. Rollins fighting through the injury was a good story and the action was the usual nice stuff, though it’s not like this is anything more than just another match for both of them.

Despite being shown to still be here, Lesnar does not appear again to end the show.

Overall Rating: T. People keep talking about how WWE is becoming more and more like WCW every single day and I can’t see that being the case. What I can see though is the company becoming more and more like TNA every day. TNA used to run these miserable shows with barely any wrestling for the first three quarters and then one good match to try and make up for it. That was the case here and the show was one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen.

This was far from the worst show WWE has ever run and it’s not even close to being in that discussion. There was some good action and storylines were advanced so it certainly accomplished things and had some moments, so it’s certainly out of the race for all time worst or even a complete waste of a show. The first hour was all time levels of bad but after that it got a lot better, bringing it all the way up to adequate.

What I saw tonight was WWE throwing out stuff and not caring if it made for a good show or not. We had more Shane, more Corbin, more Ziggler and two more bait and switches (Lesnar not making his decision and Corbin replacing AJ) while there was a big party in the back that only served as a backdrop for the 24/7 Title segment, followed by Sami sitting in an electric chair so he could take scripted questions from the audience.

We’re coming up on the second major event since Wrestlemania and it feels like they’re still stumbling around trying to figure out what to do next. After Super ShowDown, it’s Stomping Grounds, which isn’t likely to be anything more than a one or two match show either. It feels like they’re lost and can’t figure out what to do so they started running random stories and hoped people would keep watching.

Raw and Smackdown (to a lesser extent) just feel like a bunch of stuff that happens week to week with some unfocused bigger stories on top. Next Friday we get Reigns vs. Shane, Corbin vs. Rollins and Ziggler vs. Kingston in three of the main singles matches. So we have the boss’ son, a middle management goon and a guy who hasn’t wrestled in four months as the major villains. That’s really the best they can do for this show? Or for any show for that matter?

WWE needs to fix some of these things in a hurry. Maybe it’s time to go back to the very basics or restart things (AGAIN), but what they’re doing isn’t working. Pushing Shane and Corbin hasn’t exactly been inspiring and there isn’t much on either show worth seeing. It’s like they’re trying to go in too many directions without having a direction and it’s overwhelming them. I don’t know how to fix it, but something needs to change in a hurry.

Results

Shane McMahon b. Lance Anoa’i – Triangle choke

Becky Lynch/Nikki Cross b. IIconics – Man Handle Slam to Royce

Ricochet b. Cesaro – Hurricanrana driver

Baron Corbin b. The Miz, Bobby Lashley and Braun Strowman – End of Days to Miz

Seth Rollins b. Sami Zayn – Stomp

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – May 20, 2019: I’ve Seen This Before And I’ve Never Seen This Before

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 20, 2019
Location: Times Union Center, Albany, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young

We’re done with Money in the Bank and believe it or not, that means Brock Lesnar is now a big deal again because of course he is. Lesnar took Sami Zayn’s place in the men’s Money in the Bank ladder match and stole the briefcase, meaning it’s time to find out how long we get to have that hanging over our heads. Super ShowDown is in less than three weeks so let’s get to it.

Here are last night’s results if you need a recap.

We get some highlights from last night.

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar to get things going. Of course Heyman is more than capable of gloating about Lesnar being Mr. Money in the Bank because that’s what Heyman does best. Heyman talks about all the conspiracy theories about last night, and how Lesnar got into the ladder match. In reality, all that happened was Lesnar attacked Sami Zayn and made a quick deal to get into the match.

All that matters now is that the two World Champions are now vulnerable to the best assassin in WWE history. Seth Rollins and Kofi Kingston need to realize that while the whole world might not be against them, Brock Lesnar is and that might be even worse. This brings out Rollins to say he should be on top of the world after last night but he’s not in a good mood because he has to see this looking at him. He’s out here to be the champion that Lesnar never could be so he needs to get rid of the contract.

Since that’s the case, let’s do that right here tonight. Of course that’s a big negative, because Lesnar wants to make him wait. Heyman brings up Seth having to wait for his girlfriend to main event Wrestlemania and that’s nearly enough for the fight to be on. Heyman holds Lesnar back, saying he might be coming after Kofi Kingston instead. Cue Kofi so the announcers can explain the Wild Card Rule again.

Kofi wants to be one of the best champions of all time so he’s going to need Lesnar to cash that in tonight. Heyman laughs at the idea that the two champions are auditioning to face Lesnar tonight. The way Heyman understands it, Kingston and Rollins aren’t done yet so stay tuned because the Beast is yet to come.

Mick Foley arrives with the new title and is greeted by Dana Brooke, Drake Maverick, Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder. So the Raw Tag Team Champions now exist to greet a legend who is bringing in a new title.

Sami Zayn has to face Braun Strowman tonight and tries to get Bobby Lashley to take his place. Lashley tells him to go soften Strowman up for him. So Sami is fine after the attack from last night? Just like he was fine the night after being crushed in a trash compactor? How is this not a bigger story?

Seth and Kofi ask HHH what Heyman meant and are told that they’re in the main event against Bobby Lashley and Baron Corbin. As soon as I heard that they were in another match, I knew Corbin would be involved. It’s always Corbin and I don’t think WWE can explain why he’s always in these spots.

Sami Zayn vs. Braun Strowman

Sami, with bad ribs (and yes that’s all that wrong with him after last night), runs into the crowd to start and heads to the back, where they run into Lashley. The staredown with Strowman has Sami telling Lashley to DO SOMETHING but Strowman says he’ll deal with Lashley later.

Strowman goes after Sami and sends him into various things before dragging him into the arena. Sami manages to post Strowman a few times but gets sent into the barricade so they can head inside. Strowman misses a charge and hits the post so we can have the opening bell. That just earns Sami a hard clothesline (Sami: “OWWW!!!!”) to the floor where Strowman runs him over again. The running powerslam finishes Sami at 45 seconds.

Charly Caruso brings Lars Sullivan to the ring for a chat. She talks about how dominant he has been since showing up and we see a quick package of such destruction. Before he can say anything, here’s the Lucha House Party (Cole: “The Lucha House Party is back!” Yes indeed. They need a proclamation for showing up to work the day after they appeared last night.) to send Sullivan outside. Double suicide dives take Sullivan down again but he fights them off. The Freak Accident plants Dorado but Kalisto and Metalik save him from the running powerbomb.

Video on AJ Styles vs. Seth Rollins from last night.

Ricochet vs. Cesaro

Fallout from Ricochet getting hurt in the ladder match last night and Cesaro mocking him for being injured. Ricochet has the Kinesio tape on, which is bad idea against the king of the king of Kinesio tape. Cesaro gets a new entrance to replace the James Bond one, which is a good idea since the Bar is done. Cesaro starts fast with a huge backdrop and Ricochet bails to the floor. Ricochet is fine enough to hit the moonsault off the apron but bangs up his back even more. That’s fine with Cesaro, who catches another dive and slams him back first onto the apron as we take a break.

Back with Ricochet fighting out of a chinlock and countering Swiss Death by being tossed into the air and landing on the standing Cesaro’s shoulders. As in Ricochet is standing on Cesaro’s shoulders, because a human can do that. A headscissors puts Cesaro on the floor for the big dive, which is shown in a split screen for the sake of a Secret Life of Pets 2 ad. Back to full screen with Cesaro hitting Swiss Death, followed by a gorilla press backbreaker. The Neutralizer finishes Ricochet at 6:48.

Rating: C+. I knew the tape was a bad idea. This was a lot of fun with the power vs. speed formula still working because it’s one of the best things that can be done in wrestling. Cesaro winning isn’t the biggest problem in the world as his singles push is still being built up and Ricochet wasn’t healthy coming in. Now do something with both of them already.

AJ Styles knows he can beat Rollins but it just wasn’t last night. Baron Corbin comes up to mock him with the claps to say AJ is the kind of guy who always says next time. AJ brings up all of Corbin’s failures but Corbin says he should have gotten the shot since he beat Rollins two weeks ago. AJ doesn’t think that was a slap in the face as Corbin puts it and shows him what a slap in the face is. Corbin promises that AJ will pay.

Here’s Roman Reigns for a chat but before he can say anything, here’s Shane McMahon to cut him off. Shane says he’s done with the Miz and now he has a new target in Reigns. Roman hit his father a few weeks ago and Shane wants to know what kind of a man does that. The announcers don’t bring up the irony, likely because Vince forgot to tell them to bring it up.

Reigns says he hates spoiled rich kids (49 year olds with three children are rarely referred to as kids) and says that since he’s done with Elias (the rematch was already announced for tomorrow night), his schedule is wide open tonight. Let’s put that up to the audience, who seem interested.

Post break McIntyre and Shane are in the back when Miz comes up. Apparently he has McIntyre tonight and isn’t done with Shane. I’m so happy.

Usos vs. Revival

Before the match, we get a recap of what the Usos have done to the Revival over the last few weeks. Revival jumps them before the bell though the referee counts a near fall anyway because the referees have been pretty terrible lately. Jimmy gets sent into the barricade and the beatdown is on inside. An assisted suplex gets two but Jimmy gets over to the tag a few seconds later so the hot tag can bring in Jey. The Revival gets knocked to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Jey fighting out of a chinlock and hitting the enziguri, followed by more kicks to the head. The Revival takes over with a shot to the head of their own, setting up a powerbomb/top rope elbow combination (it was a little different though as Wilder powerbombed Jey at the same time Dawson jumped, meaning that at first it looked like they were on the wrong page) for two. Jey and Dawson slug it out until Jimmy comes back in for a double superkick. Everything breaks down again and Jey kicks Wilder in the face for two more. Dawson sends Jimmy outside and rolls Jey up for the pin (with tights) at 10:37.

Rating: B-. Let me guess: the win over Bryan and Rowan last night isn’t going anywhere is it? I’ll spare you another rant about WWE doing the same stupid things over and over and lament the Revival not likely going anywhere off this win. Odds are the feud continues with more pranks as we wait on more HILARIOUS WWE tropes.

Nikki Cross apologizes to Alexa Bliss for not winning last night and pleads her case when the Revival comes in to say they should be the next guests on a Moment of Bliss. Alexa isn’t sure as they parade off.

It’s time for the Firefly Fun House, which now has an opening sequence of kids playing. This breaks down into images of LET ME IN painted on people’s faces and a closeup of Bray’s mask saying Let Me In.

It’s time for A Moment of Bliss with Nikki Cross sitting in. The guest is Becky Lynch though, meaning we’re going to need another chair. Nikki moves to behind the table as Bliss asks how it feels to no longer be Becky Two Belt. Before she can answer, here are the IIconics to interrupt. Now she’s Becky One Belt but they still have their two belts, which they won at WRESTLEMANIA! They dance a bit to show off the belts but Becky calls them out for their lack of defenses.

If they don’t shut up, she’ll drag them to the ring and become Becky Three Belts. This brings out Lacey Evans to say she’s the reason Becky lost last night. Becky offers to beat up Lacey and the IIconics right now but Nikki offers to be Becky’s partner. Lacey says that’s still one short so Becky picks Bliss. Becky: “You just got to stand there and look pretty sweetheart. The Man will take care of the rest.”

IIconics/Lacey Evans vs. Becky Lynch/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross

As Bliss stands on the floor with her coffee, Becky runs Billie over to start. Peyton comes in and takes Becky down for two so Becky bridges up and kicks her in the ribs. Nikki comes in for a running splash in the corner and a bulldog gets two on Peyton. A middle rope crossbody gets the same and it’s time for Nikki and the IIconics to have a yell off.

Lacey comes in and hits the running Bronco Buster in the corner as Alexa is more interested in the temperature of her coffee. Peyton misses a charge into the post though and it’s back to Becky to pick up the pace. Lacey walks out and Billie rolls Becky up for two. The Bexploder sets up a middle rope legdrop to finish Billie at 5:31.

Rating: D+. This is a thing that happened and another instance of a champion losing a match they didn’t need to lose. I’m also surprised that the coffee didn’t get involved in the finish somehow but that might have been a bit too obvious. More Becky vs. Lacey isn’t the most appealing thing, but who else is she supposed to fight?

Here’s Mick Foley to debut the new title. He thinks there is something missing from Raw and it’s time to revisit those three letters: R-A-W. As the cover is falling off the new title, Foley says it takes a lot to be a champion in WWE (get with the times buddy). It’s something that you should sacrifice teeth and an ear for and fight 24/7 to achieve. The new title is the 24/7 Title, with a big 24/7 as the center plate.

This title can be defended anytime, anyplace, anywhere. The fans rightfully boo this out of the building and Foley seems a little shaken. You could get pinned going down the slide at Chuck E. Cheese or even in the shower, as long as there is a referee present. We are going to crown a new champion right here in the form of a scramble, with any every superstar from the Raw, Smackdown, 205 Live, NXT, NXT UK and maybe a legend being eligible to win the title. The title is laid in the ring and whomever retrieves it achieves it.

24/7 Title: Scramble

The lower card runs to the ring to get the title with Eric Young even making an appearance. We get the classic idea of fighting instead of running into the ring to get the title. Eric Young and Cedric Alexander get in the ring but get pulled out, allowing Anderson and Gallows to pick it up. That doesn’t count because it’s not one (But the Usos are one Wild Card entry?) so No Way Jose and EC3 break that up. Drake Maverick and Titus O’Neil go after it next with Titus throwing Maverick over the top and picking up the title to win at 2:37.

And then Robert Roode runs out and rolls Titus up on the ramp to win the title. Everyone gives chase, which I’m sure is what passes for entertainment around here.

Post break Roode hides as the mob runs the other way.

The lights have been turned down, which makes me think that it’s either a bad idea for making the third hour seem important or a bunch of people have left.

Miz vs. Drew McIntyre

Shane is here with McIntyre. During Drew’s entrance, we get a graphic for the Super ShowDown match between Shane and Reigns. Cole: “That match taking place at Super ShowDown, which will be equal to or exceed Wrestlemania!” This line brought to you by the Kingdom of Jeddah.

Miz goes for the legs to start to little avail and gets tossed across the ring. A sunset bomb to the floor is countered with a right hand so Miz punches Drew in the knee to slow him down. Back from a break with Miz powerbombing him out of the corner and sending McIntyre shoulder first into the post. Miz hits a springboard (minus the spring) ax handle and hurricanranas his way out of a powerbomb, only to get caught in the reverse Alabama Slam for two.

Another shot to the knee looks to set up the Figure Four but McIntyre kicks Miz into Shane for a right hand. McIntyre’s spinebuster gets two but Miz is right back with the Figure Four. That’s broken up with some chops and Miz goes after Shane again. The chase lets Shane get in another cheap shot and the Claymore finishes Miz at 13:08.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad if you cut out the Shane stuff. Shane vs. Miz is coming up on seven months now and I have no idea why anyone would want to see it continue. Miz and McIntyre were trying but when it comes after a chase scene and includes two Shane interferences, there’s only so much that can be done.

Post match Shane loads up Coast to Coast but Reigns comes in for the save.

Seth and Kofi are ready for Lesnar and their tag match. Seth won’t shake his hips though.

We look back at Rey Mysterio winning the US Title last night with the announcers talking about the shoulder clearly being up. Rey suffered a separated shoulder in the post match attack.

Samoa Joe says he never lost last night because he wasn’t pinned. He may be a monster, but Rey can have a chance to hand the title back like a man. Be the man that Rey wants Dominic to be, or imagine the example Joe will set for him.

Roode runs for the parking lot and hides in R-Truth’s trunk. The mob comes up and Truth says he went that way. They run the other way and Truth gets Roode out of the trunk. Roode opens the door and finds…..a referee. Truth sends him into the side of the car and gets the pin and the title before driving off. At least Truth can bring some funny stuff to the title.

Seth Rollins/Kofi Kingston vs. Baron Corbin/Bobby Lashley

No DQ in a surprise stipulation. Corbin jumps Seth from behind on the ramp and the fight starts on the ramp. They get inside and Corbin gets two off Deep Six. Kofi comes in to chop away at Lashley and the Boom Drop connects. Everything breaks down and the champs are sent into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Rollins hitting the Sling Blade on Corbin and bringing Kofi in.

That means a chokebreaker from Corbin as the announcers talk about Lesnar possibly cashing in tonight, all but guaranteeing that it won’t be happening. Rollins grabs a chair to break up a double superplex but Corbin punches him in the face. A springboard knee takes Corbin down and there’s a low superkick to make it worse. The suicide dive takes out Lashley and Corbin, followed by the trust fall from Kofi. Back in and Trouble in Paradise finishes Corbin at 10:36.

Rating: D+. Just a match to fill in time until Brock can come out and not cash in to end the show. Corbin losing doesn’t mean anything as he’ll likely be in a similar spot next week no matter what happens to him. The announcers made it clear that this was just about having Kofi and Seth out there for Brock, which really doesn’t do anything positive for the titles.

Post match Lashley spears both of them down and here’s Brock. Rollins has the chair though so Lesnar walks around the ring and changes his mind. Heyman says they’ll make the announcement next week.

Overall Rating: D. I really can’t remember the last time I’ve seen a show that goes from perfectly watchable at times to bouncing off the rocks at the bottom of a cliff the next. There is some nice stuff in here but then you have the return of the Hardcore Title, Baron Corbin again, two Shane feuds and going back to square one with Lesnar. It’s like they know they need to fix things but are scared to put in any kind of effort and instead go with old ideas that didn’t work in the first place.

The most frustrating thing is they know how to do things well. Bayley’s win on Sunday was a nice moment and there were good matches on this show. It’s like once you get to a certain set of people, everything goes flying out the window though and it’s getting worse every week. Instead of writing up a feud or a good match or letting people get some time on TV (Aleister Black, Buddy Murphy, and how many others from the Shakeup are still waiting for their first match while Titus O’Neil, No Way Jose and various other losers literally chase a title?), this is what we’re getting?

It really does feel like Vince books a part of the show and others run the rest. That’s making for some rather horrible television and hearing “it will be equivalent to or exceed Wrestlemania” for the next few weeks isn’t going to make things any better. The shows feel like they need an editor or a massive overhaul because the bad is expanding and the good is feeling weaker and weaker every week.

Results

Braun Strowman b. Sami Zayn – Running powerslam

Cesaro b. Ricochet – Neutralizer

Revival b. Usos – Rollup with a handful of tights

Becky Lynch/Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross b. IIconics/Lacey Evans – Middle rope legdrop to Kay

Titus O’Neil won a Scramble by picking up the title

Drew McIntyre b. The Miz – Claymore

Kofi Kingston/Seth Rollins b. Baron Corbin/Bobby Lashley – Trouble in Paradise to Corbin

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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