Monday Night Raw – December 18, 2017: It’s About That Time

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 18, 2017
Location: Dunkin Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T.

We’re officially past the last pay per view of the year and that means it’s time to get ready for the Royal Rumble. Tonight we might find out what’s going on with the Universal Title match as Brock Lesnar is here and Braun Strowman and Kane are both ready to meet him face to face. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event with Kane vs. Strowman going to a double countout in a #1 contenders match.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Kurt Angle to get things going. He recaps last week’s main event as well (they really need to stop doing that just after we watched a video saying the same thing) and promises to solve the problem by the end of the night. Strowman comes out to say he should get the shot, followed by Kane to do the same. Before anything can happen, Paul Heyman comes out to say Lesnar needs to be involved in this. Brock hits the ring and Angle speeds through an announcement of the triple threat at the Rumble so he can get out. Lesnar cleans house and F5’s Kane.

Seth Rollins vs. Samoa Joe

Hang on as Jason Jordan comes out and says he should be the one facing Samoa Joe, which he’s been wanting to do for two weeks. Rollins says he doesn’t care but here’s Joe to say fight each other and the winner fights him later tonight.

Seth Rollins vs. Jason Jordan

Joe is at ringside. Jordan wrestles him to the mat for a bit until Rollins superkicks him in the ribs. A clothesline knocks Jordan at Joe’s feet and we take a break. Back with Jordan working on the back off some Irish whips into the corner. It’s off to a chinlock with a knee in the back before the running shoulder in the corner gets two.

Jordan gets in another suplex and we take a break. Back again with Rollins getting in some offense of his own, including the springboard clothesline. Jordan clotheslines him down again but gets knocked outside for a suicide dive. The second springboard clothesline is countered into rolling northern lights suplexes for two more as this keeps going.

Jordan takes him up top but gets shoved down, setting up the frog splash for two more. They head outside with the Wind-Up Knee smashing into Jordan’s face. Seth throws Jordan into Joe before superkicking the Samoan down. Back in and the Wind-Up Knee finishes Jordan at 19:49.

Rating: B-. WAY longer than necessary here and another match that showcased the problem with Jordan: he can have good matches but he’s one of the most annoying, whiny characters around. The good thing is they seem primed to turn him heel (the right move) so it might get better, but for now he’s being rather annoying.

Post match Joe lays out both guys. Booker: “It’s called a love tap in our business.”

Back from a break with Rollins, Jordan and Dean Ambrose saying they want a piece of Samoa Joe. Angle makes a six man tag match with the three of them facing Joe/the Bar.

We look back at Matt Hardy being woken.

Bray Wyatt wants to know why people are drawn to Matt. Is it the childish laugh? Or maybe the funny faces he makes? Bray is here to make sure that the right people get hurt, like Matt and all of the fans. He starts singing before saying she is sorry because the Great War must end.

Finn Balor vs. Miztourage

Bo Dallas starts for the team as the announcers can’t stop laughing at each other in that forced way that only they can do. Balor takes care of him in short order so it’s off to Curtis Axel for some stomping in the corner. Axel right hands Balor down and continues his variety of stomping, followed by some knees from Dallas. Finn knocks Axel off the top and loads up the Coup de Grace, only to have Dallas come in for the double beatdown and the DQ at 5:44.

Rating: D+. I can live with a loss like this as you don’t want Balor to be that much of a world beater. Miz should be back soon so we can do the real feud, which should be Balor destroying him in all of five minutes. If nothing else this gives Balor a much needed win in a feud as they try to rebuild him. Granted that won’t help if he just keeps losing but it’s better than nothing.

Post match Hideo Itami makes his main roster debut for the save. I love it when WWE basically admits that 205 Live means nothing.

Hideo Itami/Finn Balor vs. Miztourage

Joined in progress after a break Itami working on Dallas’ arm and handing it back to Balor, who gets caught in a backbreaker. We hit the chinlock for a long while with Cole explaining Itami’s WWE history (minus the series of injuries). Back up and Itami gets the hot tag to clean house, including a running knee for two on Dallas. Balor takes Dallas down, leaving Itami to GTS Axel for the pin at 4:29.

Rating: C-. Itami is a rather small guy but it’s cool to see him thrown in there with the heavyweights. If nothing else it continues WWE’s rather hilarious attempts to pretend like 205 Live needs to exist, given the fact that Itami just beat up two heavyweights with practically no problem. That being said, it would have been interesting to see him debut next week in Chicago and hitting the GTS there, assuming it didn’t set off two hours of CM Punk chants.

Cedric Alexander is only going to be overlooking Drew when he’s looking over him with his hand raised in victory.

Drew Gulak vs. Cedric Alexander

The winner gets Enzo Amore for the title at some point in the future. Before the match, Enzo talks about his microphone being a lightsaber. Drew: “If we’re talking Star Wars, I’ve always considered myself a Jar Jar Binks.” The PowerPoint is loaded up but Cedric cuts him off as you knew he would. Cedric starts fast and sends Drew to the floor for a big flip dive.

Drew suplexes him over the top but gets pulled out as well, leaving them both in a heap as we take a break. Back with Gulak in control as Enzo keeps making up names for Drew. A chinlock sets up a pinfall reversal sequence, followed by Drew walking into a C4 for two. Gulak comes back with something like a sitting STF but Cedric makes the rope. Enzo looks at his phone and leaves, much to Gulak’s dismay. The springboard clothesline (the third of the night) into the Lumbar Check for the pin and the title shot at 12:52.

Rating: C. This was any given 205 Live main event and while completely acceptable, it was again mostly about Enzo. Cedric winning is the right call (despite Gulak rocketing up the entertainment charts as of late) but good night he better win the title. Enzo has destroyed everything he touches as of late and a change is needed.

Post break Enzo comes up to see Nia Jax, who seems interested in a little alone time. Gulak, with a bloody piece of gauze in his nose, comes in to ask if they can go over what happened. Enzo shouts that he did a lot of things wrong and leaves.

Asuka vs. Alicia Fox

They circle each other for a bit until the screechy Fox bails from the threat of a cross armbreaker. Back in and Fox’s northern lights suplex sets up a chinlock, only to have Asuka kick her in the head. The armbreaker makes Fox tap at 3:43.

Rating: D. Is there a reason Asuka isn’t just mauling people like Fox? Since WWE doesn’t let Asuka actually beat anyone of note, we’re stuck with her having issues with Fox and Dana Brooke. I mean….they clearly get the idea of her dominating everything but she doesn’t actually dominate most of the time. Why is this so complicated? Just let her fight a name already.

The Bar/Samoa Joe vs. Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose/Jason Jordan

Jordan tags himself in and gets to face Sheamus, who clotheslines his head off. The triple stomping sets up a Sheamus knee drop for two as Jordan is in trouble. Back from a break with Rollins in trouble this time, including a Demolition Decapitator for two. The Irish Curse keeps Seth down but a DDT gives him a little hope. Joe breaks up the hot tag attempt though and hits the corner enziguri.

Sheamus goes shoulder first into the post but Rollins still can’t make the tag. Everything breaks down with a big brawl on the floor with Ambrose cleaning house. Cesaro cuts off another hot tag attempt but Dean comes in anyway. A big suicide dive cuts everyone off but Dean is holding his elbow. The referee calls the doctor over and a very quick Brogue Kick ends Rollins at 13:30.

Rating: C. Well that’s not good. They went straight to the finish and while they did keep the camera on Dean longer than they usually would in an injury, that seemed a bit too realistic. Hopefully he’s not hurt and doesn’t have to miss any time, though given how things have gone for the Shield it wouldn’t surprise me.

Stephanie arrives. Oh come on now we were doing so well without her.

Matt Hardy is playing chess with a goldfish named Napoleon. After beating the fish and agreeing to a rematch, Matt talks about Bray Wyatt and how WWE is like a chess board. Matt goes back to the board (whose pieces have been moved) and promises to delete Bray and Sister Abigail.

Joe and the Bar attack Rollins and Ambrose, including crushing the bad arm with an anvil case.

Heath Slater/Rhyno vs. Revival

Slater gets punched in the face to start as we see Titus Worldwide, including a note taking Dana Brooke now in black with glasses, watching in the back. Wilder and Slater bang heads but Wilder is up in time to pull Rhyno off the apron. The Shatter Machine ends Slater at 3:04.

Rating: D+. Pretty much a squash here but it’s just nice to see Revival back and being dominant again. They’re still awesome and could be a good addition to the title scene, assuming they don’t break down again in all of five minutes. Slater and Rhyno are good for something like this and that’s all this needed to be.

Post break Angle comes up to Slater and Rhyno, saying they need to step it up if they want opportunities next year. Slater panics but Rhyno says his attitude needs to change and has an idea of how to fix it. Slater: “Is this going to hurt?”

Elias is in the ring and talks about being an inspiration to Tom Brady. This turns into a list of insults about Brady as Elias continues to know how to work a crowd. Angle is scared of him and it’s going to be even worse when he’s in the Royal Rumble. Elias is about to sing a song about Roger Goodell but Sasha Banks’ entrance cuts him off.

Sasha Banks/Mickie James/Bayley vs. Absolution

Banks throws Paige around to start but gets caught in the wrong corner. Absolution takes turns on her with Paige stomping her down. Paige gets tossed to the side though and the bot tag brings in Bayley as everything breaks down. The fight heads outside until Banks hits her top rope double knees on Deville, only to have the rest of Absolution come in for the brawl. The referee throws it out at 3:08.

Rating: D. That ending screams a post match angle and I’m pretty sure that’s where we’re going. I mean, we’re less than two months away from the Royal Rumble and a women’s version has been discussed. They certainly have the numbers to pull it off at this point and with Stephanie around, it sounds like announcement time.

Post match the brawl is on with the rest of the roster (including Brooke changing from her street clothes to ring gear and changing her hair) coming out. Cue Stephanie to talk about the Women’s Revolution and how important it is. We hear about all the things the women have done and the women’s Royal Rumble is announced to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This show felt very long and that’s not a good thing. The announcement at the end helped a lot (save for Stephanie’s regular screeching and everyone stopping their hatred because of her mere presence) but the wrestling wasn’t great and it felt like it was eighteen hours long again. I do however take some solace in the fact that WWE continues to treat 205 Live like it’s nothing, with Itami debuting and the #1 contenders match taking place on Raw. This wasn’t a very good show, but it’s Rumble time and that means things will get good in a hurry.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Jason Jordan – Wind-Up Knee

Finn Balor b. Miztourage via DQ when Axel and Dallas double teamed Balor

Finn Balor/Hideo Itami b. Miztourage – GTS to Axel

Cedric Alexander b. Drew Gulak – Lumbar Check

Asuka b. Alicia Fox – Cross armbreaker

The Bar/Samoa Joe b. Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose/Jason Jordan – Brogue Kick to Rollins

Revival b. Heath Slater/Rhyno – Shatter Machine to Slater

Mickie James/Bayley/Sasha Banks b. Absolution via DQ when Absolution triple teamed Banks

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – July 17, 2003: Stephanie McMahon On A Leash

Smackdown
Date: July 17, 2003
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re almost to Vengeance and the good things in the build towards the show have been quite good. At the same time though, the bad thing is very bad. Vince vs. Stephanie is running wild and for some reason we’re supposed to want to see Vince vs. Zach Gowen at the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

This was actually taped on Sunday as the Smackdown roster was going on an Asian tour.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event with Big Show chokeslamming Brock Lesnar through a table.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Vince to get things going. He recaps the Gowen story (minus the Hogan aspect) up to last week and blames Kurt Angle for Gowen winning his contract. The point is everyone needs to be taught a lesson, which is what Gowen learned last week (I think he meant to say Lesnar there).

Last week ended with Lesnar being chokeslammed through a table while Angle was in Vince’s office. Vince had Angle stay in the back because if he interfered, he would be out of the triple threat at Vengeance. Therefore tonight, Angle will be facing the same match tonight: no holds barred, falls count anywhere against Big Show/Charlie Haas/Shelton Benjamin.

Cue Lesnar to say he’s here to beat the boss….and Vince actually makes himself vs. Brock. Just not tonight of course. Vince wants Brock to be at 100% so tonight, Brock has the night off. That includes keeping him out of tonight’s handicap match. If he interferes, he’s stripped of the title and fired. Brock leaves, but since he can’t give Vince an F5, he’ll settle for FU.

US Title Tournament Semifinals: Matt Hardy vs. Chris Benoit

Matt, who’s beard is much cooler than Benoit’s and tans wearing only a sock, has Shannon Moore back in his corner. Benoit tries a Crossface less than ten seconds in (you don’t insult a man’s beard) but settles for a regular armbar instead. Matt gets tied up in the ropes so Shannon sneaks in for a neckbreaker to change control. It’s off to a seated full nelson for a bit until Benoit pops up with a running forearm to the head.

Shannon comes in again and is promptly suplexed over the top and out to the floor. The Crossface goes on but Matt, with a bloody nose or lip, is in the ropes in a hurry. A Side Effect gives Matt two but he misses a Swan Dive. Benoit rolls some German suplexes, only to miss a Swan Dive of his own. Matt takes him up top for a super Side Effect, only to be countered into the Crossface to send Benoit to Vengeance.

Rating: B-. Matt was trying hard out there and the finish looked awesome. This was a solid match and that’s not the most surprising thing in the world, especially given the fact that Hardy is back to his normal range of opponents. Hopefully this is the kind of match the US Title starts to represent and if that’s the case, Benoit will be just fine.

Vince is in Stephanie’s office when she comes in to say she expected to find him here. Sable isn’t here tonight but has sent a peace offering: Midol. It’s as funny as it sounds.

Brock goes to leave but and Angle can’t stop him.

Ultimo Dragon vs. Jamie Noble

Before the match, Jamie ups his offer to $25,000 for a night with Torrie Wilson. Nidia walks away in a huff. I’d have expected her to approve actually. Dragon kicks him down to start and seems surprised at Noble kicking out. Noble heads outside and there’s the Asai moonsault for good measure. Back in and Jamie kicks him down, only to have Billy Gunn and Torrie come out for a distraction. Dragon grabs a rollup for the pin. If Dragon needs Billy Gunn to beat a comedy cruiserweight, just leave now.

John Cena is in a cemetery and raps about Undertaker being gay and a dead issue. He also relieves himself on a grave.

We look back at Rey Mysterio and Billy Kidman becoming #1 contenders last week.

The APA invites Brian Kendrick and Spanky to the first ever APA Invitational Bar Room Brawl at Vengeance. Kanyon can’t go because his cable guy is coming. That’s not an option so threats of violence make Kanyon agree to reschedule.

Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman vs. Los Conquistadors

These would be Conquistador #45 and #47, who I believe are Rob Conway and Nick Dinsmore. 45 (Conway) starts things off with Kidman and a headscissors takes the masked man down. Mysterio comes in but gets cheapshotted from the apron so 47 (who certainly looks like Dinsmore) can get in some forearms.

The masked men make a switch with no tag (the referee doesn’t notice despite 45 having blond hair sticking out from underneath the mask) and a neckbreaker gets two on Kidman. A powerbomb is broken up and there’s the 619 into the shooting star for the pin on 45. Not bad actually, but that’s not surprising given who was under the masks.

Here’s Vince for another chat. He’s not happy with being interrupted earlier because he wanted to talk about Sable, who is in the Presidential box. She’s up there for Stephanie’s protection and Vince explains her sexual prowess. This shifts into a discussion of Gowen, who has a handicap. That must make the fans feel a little uncomfortable and everyone here knows it. Sure they might give a few bucks to charity but that’s just a way to keep the conditions at arm’s length.

Cue Cena of all people, with Vince dancing a bit to his music. Cena talks about Gowen winning being an impossible mission because just like Ted Turner, he’s no competition. At Vengeance, he’s killing a dead man while Vince fights Christopher Reeves. Cena: “What’s better than a one legged wrestler? Being able to walk!” Vince: “Word life.” Undertaker comes out and clears the ring without much effort.

Rhyno vs. Sean O’Haire

They fight outside before the bell but here’s the APA to invite them to the Bar Room Invitational. I know Piper leaving messed with O’Haire’s push but this is all they have for him? Fighting ensues.

Sable complains about the service in her suite.

US Title Tournament Semifinals: Eddie Guerrero vs. Billy Gunn

Feeling out process to start until Gunn punches him down. A powerslam gets two and a delayed vertical suplex is good for the same. Eddie sends him into the corner and hammers away before getting two off a snapmare of all things. We hit a chinlock with Tazz making jokes about Torrie bouncing as she plays cheerleader. Billy fights up and hits a release faceplant, only to get caught in a half crab (looked to be the Lasso From El Paso but it fell apart).

Eddie’s brainbuster sets up the frog splash but Billy rolls away because this needs to keep going. Billy’s cobra clutch slam gets two (he’s no Jinder Mahal) and here’s Jamie for a distraction. Eddie gets in a chair shot and drops to the mat to make sure the referee doesn’t know who did it. So for once the referee actually heard the chair shot? That might be a first and Eddie gets the pin.

Rating: C-. So now the US Title tournament is being used to set up Gunn vs. Noble? They really are going for it this time around. Anyway, Eddie winning was the only option here and that’s the right move. At least we should get a classic out of the title match and Gunn vs. Noble can be five minutes long for the thrilling conclusion.

Sable is being interviewed when Stephanie sneaks in (read as walks in wearing a waiter’s uniform) to pour wine over Sable’s head. Catfighting ensues and food is spilled everywhere.

Kurt Angle vs. Big Show/World’s Greatest Tag Team

Hardcore. Angle gets double teamed in the corner to start as Show stands on the apron for the sake of dramatic convenience. Charlie gets sent head first into Shelton’s crotch though and it’s off to Big Show for a headbutt. A trashcan lid to the back gets two on Angle and the villains finally realize triple teaming is perfectly fine.

Back in and Show gets low bridged outside, leaving Angle to German suplex the normal sized opponents. A heck of a chair shot drops Show and we take a break. Back with Haas being sent over the barricade and Benjamin getting clotheslined down. They head into the crowd with Benjamin being thrown through a gate and Charlie getting caught in the ankle lock. Show makes a save and takes Angle to the stage.

The group beatdown continues until Angle cleans house with a trashcan lid. Show gets in a clothesline though and here’s Gowen for some jumping knees to the head. Angle Slams take down Show and Benjamin but Show is up fast enough to save Haas from the ankle lock. Gowen gets thrown into the barricade but Angle hits Show with the steps. Back in and Shelton kicks Charlie by mistake, setting up the ankle lock for the submission.

Rating: B-. I liked this more than I expected to as they allowed the match to build up and let Angle hang in there long enough to steal a win. The interference helps a bit and while it’s a stretch to have Angle beat them, he didn’t pin Show and outsmarted the champs rather than flat out defeating them. Good match, especially with Angle one upping Lesnar after last week.

Overall Rating: C-. They kept the Vince/Stephanie/Sable/Gowen stuff on more of a leash this week and it helped a lot. Unfortunately we got two Gunn vs. Noble segments instead so it kind of balances out. The wrestling was better this week with some matches getting time, though there are still a lot of problems around here. That being said, Vengeance is looking better each week as there’s a chance that they’ll give the matches enough time to pay off all the build put into them. Not a great show, but they’re fixing some of the problems.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – July 10, 2003: The New Combination That Is Sweeping The Nation

Smackdown
Date: July 10, 2003
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re on the road to Vengeance and that means it’s time to start setting up a few things. We already have a triple threat main event for the World Title but I’m worried about what might be coming with the McMahons and Zach Gowen, especially now that Hogan is gone. Actually that could be an improvement, depending on what they do to replace him. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Gowen getting a contract last week. I’m sure nothing but good things will come of this.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Kurt Angle to open the show but Cole won’t stop talking about Gowen. Angle recaps the World Title picture and the triple threat at Vengeance. He’d love to get his title back and tells Big Show and Brock Lesnar to bring it on. Instead it’s John Cena answering to make gay jokes about Lesnar and Angle. He thinks his match with Undertaker is the real main event for the pay per view and Angle is just a joke. They’re like Terminator 3 and Angle is like a Legally Blonde sequel (I saw that in theaters and it wasn’t that bad).

Angle: “I didn’t think it was possible, but I think I’ve found someone in the company even whiter than I am.” Kurt talks about his wrestling skills and says he knows both versions. He’s great as an amateur, but sometimes he likes to kick it freestyle. Angle steals Cena’s hat and I think you know what’s coming. Tazz: “Oh no.” Cena laughs it off and says there’s no way he’s losing to a wannabe Kojak. Angle: “Ok I don’t even know what you just said.”

Kurt has Brian Hebner do the beat boxing and the rap talks about moving on up like the Jeffersons. Word. Cena: “THAT WAS FOUL!” The fans are rather pleased with Angle, even as Cena steals his hat back. Kurt hugs him because he majored in huganomics. Are we sure he’s not really Bayley’s dad? Angle and Cena go nose to nose but here’s Big Show to interrupt. The distraction lets Cena jump him from behind and hit an FU, followed by a chokeslam from Big Show. Angle as the goofy dork is always hilarious stuff.

FBI vs. Basham Brothers vs. Billy Kidman/Rey Mysterio vs. APA

#1 contenders match and one fall to a finish. The Bashams and FBI don’t even get entrances. Simmons (no longer Faarooq) and Palumbo start things off with Ron getting two off an early powerslam. Danny comes in and gets double teamed by the APA but Kidman tags himself in for a smart move.

Bradshaw decks Kidman for bothering him so Rey has to springboard in with a seated senton for a save. We actually hear about Mysterio and Kidman being former WCW Tag Team Champions, which isn’t a reign you often hear brought up. The APA and the FBI brawl to the back, making me wonder why this wasn’t an elimination match in the first place. Everything breaks down with the cruiserweights hitting double flip dives.

Back from a break with Danny holding Rey in a chinlock as we see the other teams brawling backstage. Mysterio gets a bulldog on Danny and the hot tag (minus the fans caring) brings in Kidman. In one of the most impressive feats of nonsense Cole has ever pulled off, he says that the Bashams beating this rookie team would be a huge upset.

So a team that won Tag Team Titles years ago are rookies and the Bashams, who are in a #1 contenders match, are so worthless that a win over some rookies would be an upset? I feel like I need a color coordinated chart to make sense of that. Kidman reverses Doug’s powerbomb but Shaniqua breaks up the shooting star press. The second attempt connects, but this time Danny makes a save. Rey tags himself in for the 619 and Drops the Time for the pin, albeit one kind of stolen from Kidman.

Rating: C. Not bad at all here with an ending that plants seeds for a likely Kidman heel turn. The other two teams didn’t really need to be there in the first place but I can understand the idea of not having the Bashams, who are already perennial losers, in a #1 contenders match on their own. That being said, what does it say when your four top contenders for the titles are a team who have never teamed together in this company, losers like the FBI, a team with three matches together and the reunited APA?

Angle is getting iced down when Brock Lesnar comes in. Kurt wants to know where Brock was but Lesnar says he just got here. Bickering ensues.

Here’s the full main event from last week, because this Zach Gowen/Stephanie McMahon combination is sweeping the nation.

It’s time for Gowen’s contract signing, with Stephanie, in a rather small and non-professional black outfit, coming out with said contract over her head like a boxing round card. Stephanie introduces Gowen and puts more energy into it than when Mr. America debuted. Gowen talks about how this is his lifelong dream and he has to thank Stephanie, Angle and Lesnar for their help. Above all else though, he needs to thank the fans for their love and support.

Gowen signs and here are Vince and Sable less than a second later. Vince mockingly praises Gowen before making Lesnar Big Show/Charlie Haas/Shelton Benjamin for later. As for Vengeance, it’s Vince vs. Gowen because this story deserves that kind of attention for whatever reason. Sable knocks Stephanie out with the clipboard (with a shot that wouldn’t have knocked down a five year old) to wrap things up.

Post break Sable and Vince celebrate in the back but Stephanie charges in and spears her over a couch, screeching about how much she hates Sable. Thankfully Vince cuts off that horrible ANGRY Stephanie voice to make Sable vs. Stephanie at Vengeance.

Matt Hardy/Shannon Moore vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno

Matt, who lost his virginity at 17 and has never had earrings, gets punched in the jaw to start with Rhyno taking over on his own. Shannon gets in a shot to the back though and the villains take over. A Side Effect gets two and Shannon comes in for something like a cobra clutch. Rhyno fights up and hits a hot shot, setting up the hot tag to Benoit. That means German suplexes and a Swan Dive to Shannon but Matt grabs a quick Twist of Fate to cut him off. Rhyno Gores Matt down, leaving Benoit to grab the Crossface and make Shannon tap.

Rating: D+. Just a short match here as we continue the US Title tournament build. I’m still wondering when they’re going to have Benoit and Rhyno split for real as they teased it for a few weeks and then just forgot it. At least Benoit is doing something with the tournament though, which is better than being stuck in a low level tag team.

Angle tells Lesnar he has his back tonight so Lesnar will be ready for Vengeance.

Here’s Eddie Guerrero for a US Title tournament match. Before said match, Eddie wishes Tajiri a very sincere get well soon. Sometimes he loses his temper, which is what happened last week when they lost the titles and his car got banged up. That would be like touching his mamacita, which you just do not do. The fans cheer for Eddie, who says it’s time to look out for himself.

US Title Tournament First Round: Eddie Guerrero vs. Ultimo Dragon

This should be good. Dragon rolls him up to start and snaps off the rapid fire kicks to send Eddie outside. Back in and Eddie’s belly to belly gets two but Dragon kicks him outside, nearly banging the car up again. The car is fine though and Eddie comes back in, only to get hurricanranaed. He’s right back up though as Dragon tries a moonsault press, which is reversed into a small package (with a handful of tights) to give Eddie the pin.

Rating: D+. This needed another….oh I’d say ten minutes or so given the potential they had. I really don’t get the usage of Dragon either as he was brought in as a big deal, had a not great match with Shannon Moore, and then loses to Eddie in a three minute match. I’d hope they haven’t given up on him already but this isn’t a good sign.

Billy Gunn and Torrie Wilson almost get caught in the back by Earl Hebner. Torrie giggles it off in more bad acting.

Billy Gunn/Torrie Wilson vs. Nidia/Jamie Noble

Nidia tries to jump on Billy to start and gets flipped down. It’s off to Torrie for the catfight with Tazz being very interested in Torrie throwing chops. Cole has figured something out: both of these teams are dating. Tazz: “You’re a genius!” Torrie ends Nidia in short order with a DDT.

Post match Jamie offers $10,000 to sleep with him, earning a quick beatdown. Nidia tries for a save and loses her shorts.

Vince wants to see Angle in his office right now, meaning Kurt can’t accompany Brock to the ring.

Vengeance run down. Aside from the McMahons nonsense, it’s actually a good looking show.

Big Show/Shelton Benjamin/Charlie Haas vs. Brock Lesnar

This is also falls count anywhere. Before the match, Haas and Benjamin officially dub themselves the World’s Greatest Tag Team. I’ve heard worse names. We’re joined in progress with Brock throwing Haas and Benjamin around but Charlie breaks up an F5 on the floor. Big Show is nowhere to be seen as Brock takes Charlie inside and drives him into the corner.

Shelton offers a hand with a low bridge, allowing Show to pop back up with a chair shot for two on Lesnar. Things settle down a bit with Show working over Brock’s ribs and dropping a huge leg. Shelton comes in to jump over Charlie and onto Lesnar’s back for two more. We hit a waistlock for a big before Show comes back in for a bearhug.

Lesnar slips out and manages a belly to belly as everything breaks down. Show gets posted, an F5 drops Charlie and Shelton gets a belly to belly on the floor. Brock loads up the announcers’ table but Show saves Shelton from an F5 through said table. Instead it’s a chokeslam through the table to give Show the pin.

Rating: D. WAY longer than it needed to be here with Brock’s hope spots only working so well. The falls count anywhere thing didn’t add much to it either, save for the ending spot, which didn’t really need to be there. Show getting a pin gives him a little momentum heading into the pay per view, assuming they don’t waste it before we get there.

Overall Rating: D+. The problem here is the McMahon story, which isn’t interesting and is dragging the rest of the show down with it. I have no idea why they think Gowen is the be all and end all of interest, but hopefully it’s from a lack of anything else to do there. Mr. America might not have been good but at least he had some charisma. Gowen looks like he’s about fifteen years old, can’t talk and is little more than a novelty act yet he’s suddenly the big focal point of the top story on the show. Maybe the Hogan exit changed things but my goodness this isn’t doing much good.

The main event is more understandable as they’re pretty clearly setting up Lesnar vs. Angle for Summerslam and you don’t want to waste that big of a match at Vengeance. Putting Big Show in there is kind of annoying but in this case I understand why he’s there. He has history with both guys and I’d rather suffer through him again than waste someone young in a match they have no chance of either winning or getting to show off in.

Overall, this feels like the rough period we need to get through before we can move on to something interesting. Eddie turning heel and some of the singles pushes look good, plus Lesnar vs. Angle II should be fun. If they can tone down and scale back a lot of the McMahon drama, this show is a lot better in a hurry. As it is though, there’s only so much you can do with such a big mess in the middle.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – July 3, 2003: Why Is This A Theme?

Smackdown
Date: July 3, 2003
Location: Blue Cross Arena, Rochester, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Believe it or not, tonight is going to be focused on Stephanie McMahon, who is still trying to save Zach Gowen from her dad or whatever it is this time. Therefore, tonight it’s Gowen/Stephanie against Big Show for Gowen’s contract because that’s what this show is looking for. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of Vince vs. Gowen, including Vince trying to make Gowen join his club last week. Last week’s six man main event is included, which set up tonight’s handicap match.

Vince, in a creepy closeup, says he’s ready to close the fate of Mr. America. After that, he’ll see Stephanie and Gowen crushed in the first ever true handicap match.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Nunzio

Nunzio is challenging and Billy Kidman is in the crowd again. I know facing Undertaker is supposed to be a rub but is getting squashed by him for weeks really worth a title shot? The other Italians are sent to the back to start. Are you sure that getting rid of those two bumbling nitwits doesn’t make this harder for Rey? The champ spins out of a wristlock to start and sends Nunzio outside for a big flip dive.

Back in and Nunzio dropkicks him out of the air for two, setting up a double arm crank. A chinlock keeps Rey in trouble until a headscissors gives him a breather. The springboard seated senton gets two and a hurricanrana takes both of them out to the floor in a crash. Cue the Italians to take Mysterio out but Nunzio can only get two. The APA comes out to dispatch Stamboli and Palumbo, leaving Rey to hit the 619 and Drop the Dime to retain.

Rating: C+. They were starting to roll here until the interference, but at least Rey still won clean. I’m still trying to figure out what the point is in having the FBI around and getting this kind of a push, though at least they’re not winning anything. Mysterio needs a good challenger and it seems that they’re already preparing for that issue. Good little match here.

Kidman comes in and congratulates Mysterio.

Brock Lesnar and Kurt Angle (with milk) are sitting in catering and get in a friendly argument over who a woman meant when she said “hi champ”. Angle says he’ll get the title back at Vengeance so Brock tells him to drink his milk. Kurt flirts with the woman until Brock slaps him on the back, causing him to spit milk on her. Comedy ensues.

Basham Brothers vs. Rhyno/Chris Benoit

Before the match, Shaniqua gives the Brothers a quick whipping with the riding crop. It’s a brawl to start with the Bashams actually taking over early on. Danny hammers on Rhyno and scores with an enziguri. Some hard crossface shots set up a cravate but it’s already time for heel miscommunication. The hot tag brings Benoit in but Danny breaks up the rolling German suplexes. The release version works a bit better though, setting up the Swan Dive for a delayed two. It’s a Gore to Doug and the Crossface makes Danny tap.

Rating: D+. So the tag division is just a step above dead in the water with two teams, let’s have a potentially good team job most of the time while making them look stupid with the whole spanking things. Shaniqua doesn’t need to be there but she was on Tough Enough so they have to get something out of her right? Also didn’t Benoit and Rhyno break up twice already?

Shaniqua looks at Benoit post match. Run away Chris.

Vince is in his office and using pencils to play his desk like a drum. That’s one of the oddest visuals I’ve seen in a long time. Stephanie comes in and says she’s a woman and shouldn’t be put into this situation. Vince says spare the rod and spoil the child, but Stephanie says she’s not a child in a voice that makes her sound about three years old. He doesn’t care and she cowers away. How long is this stupid story going to go on?

Post break Sable annoys Stephanie and says she’ll take care of things if Stephanie is put on the shelf.

Jamie Noble and Nidia, fresh off getting $827 thousand, have a limo, sunglasses and a fur coat. Noble tips the driver and then takes the money back.

Undertaker critiques Orlando Jordan’s boxing and explains paying dues. Jordan needs to challenge people like John Cena if he wants to earn respect. Cena comes up to ask where Undertaker has been since he gave Cena respect last year. He calls himself a veteran now and tells Undertaker to stay out of his business. You can guess Undertaker’s reaction.

US Title Tournament First Round: Billy Gunn vs. John Cena

Side note: we’re about forty five minutes into this show. So far we’ve had a recap of Vince lowering his pants last week, Shaniqua spanking the Bashams, Jamie spanking Nidia when she got the coat out of the limo and you know Gunn’s theme song. Why is that their best available theme? Cena makes gay jokes and demands respect. Gunn gives chase to start and stomps away in the corner as Cole tries to make us care about Billy again. Cena bails to the floor as the fans are cheering him for one of the first times ever.

A whip into the post has Billy in trouble and it’s time for the chinlock. Cena kicks him down for two as Cole tries to connect this US Title’s lineage to the one from the mid 1970s. I know that’s the case but it’s also quite the stretch. Billy finally escapes with a powerslam but walks into the Throwback (named for the first time here). That’s only good for two so it’s time to grab the chain. Cue Undertaker on the motorcycle for a distraction though, allowing Billy to get a small package for the pin.

Rating: D. Undertaker vs. Cena should be entertaining but this Gunn stuff is getting more and more annoying every single week. He’s the same guy with the same song that hasn’t worked in a very long time but now we’re supposed to buy him as a serious act. Oh and that Torrie has a thing for him. It does show you what being tall can get for you in a career.

Lesnar and Angle continue to act like frat boys and decide to have a pushup contest. Brock does 301 first (with a commercial in between) as I’m more curious about who can be seen just off camera watching this whole thing. With Lesnar finished, Angle declares him the winner and walks off. Eh funny ending, but who looks at Lesnar and Angle and thinks they need to do a buddy comedy?

Tag Team Titles: Shelton Benjamin/Charlie Haas vs. Eddie Guerrero/Tajiri

Eddie and Tajiri are defending. Tajiri headlocks Haas down to start before switching over to a hammerlock. Eddie takes over on Benjamin’s arm as they’re certainly moving to start. An armdrag/headscissors combination takes both challengers down and the Eddie chants begin. As they should to be fair. Haas gets in a backbreaker for a breather as Tazz keeps ripping on Cole for calling this fun.

Eddie suplexes his way to freedom in short order and it’s back to Tajiri for the rapid fire kicks. A hurricanrana is broken up so Haas muscles Tajiri up, allowing Shelton to springboard in for a clothesline/powerbomb combination. Sweet move there but ti’s only good for two more.

Back from a break with Tajiri caught in an abdominal stretch with the challengers doing the switch when the referee wasn’t looking. The referee ACTUALLY NOTICES and brings Benjamin back in….to take Tajiri down again. Well that felt like a waste of a spot. Haas hammers away on Tajiri, followed by Shelton jumping over Charlie onto Tajiri’s back. Tajiri slips out of what looked to be a powerbomb and kicks Shelton in the back of the head (loud one too).

That’s enough for the hot tag to Eddie and the rolling suplexes have Haas in trouble. The frog splash is broken up but Tajiri takes Shelton down with the handspring elbow. Eddie gets sent outside so Tajiri starts in with more kicks, followed by the Tarantula to Haas. Shelton avoids a frog splash though and Tajiri gets kicked off the apron, onto the hood of the low rider. Back in and the atomic drop with a superkick to Eddie’s chest gives Charlie the pin and the titles.

Rating: B. These four have some solid chemistry together and it’s nice to see Charlie and Shelton get the belts back. They were a really strong team when they got the belts and while the feud with Eddie and Chavo/Tajiri did them a lot of good, they probably should have held the belts throughout. Eddie didn’t seem happy with Tajiri for being knocked onto the car and there’s a good chance they’re going to have an issue because of it.

Gowen is stretching in the back when Big Show comes in to step on the leg. Tonight, he’s going after Gowen’s legs. It didn’t work for the Executioner at Wrestlemania I and I doubt it works for Big Show tonight.

Back from a break with Tajiri still on the hood and Eddie looking dejected. Eddie goes over to check on him….but he really just wants to check on the car.

Video on Mr. America. Stephanie saying she signed him sight unseen triggers my memories of how ridiculous so much of this story was and it’s even worse when I realize that Vince vs. Stephanie is continuing.

Eddie is STILL looking at the car and Tajiri is still down behind him. It’s finally too much for Eddie and he snaps, sending Tajiri into the hood (which won’t help the paint) and then dropping him through the windshield for a great looking crash.

Orlando Jordan vs. A-Train

Jordan’s dropkick has no effect and A-Train launches him into the corner for a beating. A splash to the back has Jordan in even more trouble and it’s off to the reverse full nelson (kind of like a Gory Special but pulling on the arms instead of the face). An enziguri knocks A-Train into the corner but the Derailer gets two. Jordan’s high crossbody only hits mat and the Train Wreck gives A-Train the pin.

Rating: D. I know what they’re going for with Jordan but there’s only so much you can get out of someone so average. History hasn’t exactly been kind to Jordan but then you watch a match like this and you understand why. There’s nothing special about him, be it his look, his work or his personality. Just having him out there as a guy in trunks isn’t going to do him any good and kicking out of the Derailer isn’t enough to change that.

Show tries to intimidate Stephanie and even twirls her hair around. There are, ahem, other ways he’d like to hurt her. Show walks away and runs into Vince and Sable, the former of whom has an announcement regarding Mr. America.

Wrestlemania Recall: Jake Roberts vs. Honky Tonk Man from Wrestlemania III. Was Alice Cooper being around that big of a deal? The post match stuff with Alice throwing the snake onto Jimmy Hart was good but it’s not that good.

Here are Vince and Sable for the announcement. Vince recaps the Mr. America story and knows that it was Hulk Hogan under the mask. If Vince could prove that, Hogan was gone for good. That brings us to last week’s Smackdown where Vince thought something might be up.

Vince told the cameramen to keep recording, which captured Mr. America lifting his mask to reveal Hogan and telling everyone to keep it quiet. Therefore, Hogan is FIRED (he had quit earlier in the week due to creative differences, which likely means he wanted the title and wasn’t getting it) and gone for good. Or at least the better part of two years. It’s kind of a lame ending but at least they wrapped it up with a storyline explanation.

As for tonight, Zach Gowen is in a handicap match against Big Show. That’s not good enough though, because it’s going to be no holds barred. As a bonus for Big Show, he’s being added to the Smackdown World Title match at Vengeance to make it a triple threat. I’m so thrilled by all of this.

Stephanie McMahon/Zach Gowen vs. Big Show

Anything goes. Why do I have a feeling this was due to Stephanie thinking she needed to show off how good shape she was in? Gowen’s early offense has as much effect as you would expect and Show shoves him outside. Stephanie jumps on Show’s back and let’s hear that screeching! Show flips her down and grabs Gowen’s (detached) prosthetic leg. A dropkick doesn’t hurt Show, who catches a diving Gowen and throws him back inside.

Stephanie gets thrown inside as well but for some reason Vince won’t let Show chokeslam her. Gowen comes in for the save and takes the chokeslam instead. Stephanie gets in her big moment with the slap to Vince but Angle comes out to save her from another chokeslam. A Vince chair shot breaks up the ankle lock so here’s Lesnar for a save of his own. The Angle Slam and an F5 set up Gowen’s moonsault for the pin and the contract.

Rating: D-. Lesnar’s F5 looked good and that’s about it for this one. The match was a glorified segment of course and while it advances the story, that doesn’t make it any more interesting. This Stephanie standing up to her father and using Gowen to fight the battle for him isn’t good and other than the McMahons, I’m not sure who thinks it’s the best way to go. Throwing Big Show into the World Title match takes away a lot of the interest I had in seeing Lesnar vs. Angle II, but it’s time for Big Show’s annual push, whether we like it or not.

Overall Rating: D. There were good parts to this show but the big story is so dull and lifeless that it’s dragging things down. The story is far from the worst thing they’ve ever done (it’s not even the worst thing Stephanie has done this year) but it’s a bunch of people I don’t care about doing a bunch of stuff that has been done in a better version before. Gowen is a case where once you see his stuff once, the interest goes away in a hurry. Now he’s involved in the top story on the show, which is likely going to go on for months because that’s how the McMahons work.

There’s still good stuff on the show though, such as Cena vs. Undertaker (which has potential), Eddie’s heel turn after a really good match, the former Team Angle back on top of the division and Rey as Cruiserweight Champion. As usual though, the problem comes down to the McMahons dominating the show with their stupid issues and Stephanie’s bad acting. Just don’t let her talk or interact with Vince and this show gets a lot better in a hurry.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – June 26, 2003: Old Guys Out

Smackdown
Date: June 26, 2003
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentators: Tazz, Michael Cole

We’re back in the World’s Most Famous Arena with the blue show, including a likely six man tag after the end of last week’s show. Odds are we’re looking at Brock Lesnar/Kurt Angle/Mr. America vs. Big Show/Shelton Benjamin/Charlie Haas, which offers some interesting combinations. Of course it also offers Mr. America wrestling and that might not be the best thing in the world. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s Zack Gowan/Sable/Vince McMahon/Stephanie McMahon issues, including Sable humiliating Gowan to Vince’s amusement and Stephanie going on a rant about how her father treated her like garbage. In other words, it’s still all about Vince and Stephanie.

Opening sequence.

Here’s John Cena to brag about how awesome his rookie year has been. Eh it’s been good, but when you’re in the same class as Brock Lesnar, it’s not much to brag about. However, none of it would have started without answering an open challenge. Let’s have another open challenge right now.

John Cena vs. Orlando Jordan

Josh Matthews is ring announcer for some reason. Cena laughs this off and insults New York but Jordan takes him down to start fast. A belly to belly suplex gives Jordan two but Cena plants him with a release spinebuster. The FU is countered with Jordan landing on his feet and coming back with a dropkick. Jordan goes up for a high crossbody but Cena rolls through and grabs the trunks for the pin.

Undertaker comes out and chases Cena off before giving Jordan the respect pat on the ribs. I’m not sure this one is going to work as well.

Undertaker/APA vs. FBI

And you know Undertaker needs help with this one. Palumbo headlocks Undertaker to start but it’s already off to the arm cranking. A kick to the face just annoys Undertaker and there’s Old School. The Italians take over in the corner with Nunzio dropkicking him in the face but easily allowing the hot tag off to Faarooq.

Palumbo gets in a cheap shot and it’s Faarooq giving the FBI their false hope for a bit. We hit a reverse chinlock until Palumbo crotches himself on Faarooq’s knee. The hot tag (minus the fans reacting) brings in Bradshaw to clean house. Everything breaks down and it’s a chokeslam for Palumbo, followed by the Clothesline From Bradshaw for the pin on Stamboli.

Rating: D. I’m not even sure what to say here. Undertaker regularly beat up all three Italians and now we’re supposed to be impressed or interested when two other big brawlers beat them up too? The match was a glorified squash with the minute or so of Faarooq being in trouble not exactly making this thrilling. Can we please find something else for Undertaker to do now?

Jamie Noble and Nidia annoy some fans on the streets of New York when an attorney comes up. Apparently Jamie’s aunt died and left him $827,000. I’ll ignore the questions about how the attorney knew they were there or why he did such official business on the streets, or at least in a parking lot. Nidia tries to take the attorney’s pants off but they decide to go to a fancy dinner at Applebee’s instead.

Wrestlemania Recall: the first edition.

Sable tries to make up for last week to Vince but he turns her down. He has something to do tonight.

US Title Tournament First Round: Matt Hardy vs. Rikishi

No one with Matt, who has better abs than Rikishi, this week. Matt is also officially out of the cruiserweight division so the experiment is over. Rikishi shoves him over to start and Matt already has to bail from the threat of a Stink Face. A posting lets Matt crank on both of Rikishi’s arms, which is about the extent of the offense.

Rikishi plants him with a belly to belly suplex and the Rikishi Driver knocks Matt silly. It doesn’t knock him out for three though, which is a rather questionable kickout when Hardy’s head bounced off the mat. The Rump Shaker hits raised knees though and the Twist of Fate gets two. Matt takes off a turnbuckle, avoids a charge into said buckle, and hits a second Twist for the pin.

Rating: D+. That Rikishi Driver looked great (as it did most of the time) but they really could have just ended it after the first Twist of Fate. The tournament isn’t exactly setting the world on fire yet but it might get better with some brackets or at least a list of names in the thing. You know, assuming they know who is in the thing at the moment.

Billy Kidman, still out of action with an injury, is in the front row but wants to be back in the ring.

Tag Team Titles: Roddy Piper/Sean O’Haire vs. Eddie Guerrero/Tajiri

Eddie and Tajiri are defending as we need to wedge an MSG legend onto the card. O’Haire jumps Eddie at the bell but gets taken down for a quick slingshot hilo. It’s off to Tajiri for the handspring elbow and a superkick for two. Piper has to break up a Tarantula and then comes in legally to a nice nostalgia reaction. After a few stomps and some slaps to Eddie, it’s already back to O’Haire for a chinlock. A powerslam is countered with a reverse DDT and Tajiri brings Eddie back in. Everything breaks down and Piper gets misted, setting up the frog splash to retain the titles.

Rating: D. As usual, Eddie and Tajiri looked fine, albeit at the expense of someone who should be winning the US Title tournament. This push for O’Haire hasn’t gotten him anywhere and, again, it’s almost all about Piper. There’s no benefit to the two of them being associated and O’Haire is floundering more and more by the day. Of course none of that matters as this was it for Piper in the company due to some comments he made in an interview with HBO. Really, it’s not much of a loss for WWE as Piper was barely worth keeping around at this point, save for the occasional good line in Piper’s Pit.

We see the end of last week’s show, which set up tonight’s six man tag.

Here’s Vince to call out Stephanie and Gowan. Vince sucks up to Stephanie, calling her the apple of her father’s eye. She grew up in a hurry and when she was seventeen, he did have her, ahem, close some business deals for him. Those actions stole her innocence and it was as if Vince personally deflowered her (I know it’s never flat out stated, but it’s pretty clear what he’s talking about and that’s rather disturbing). He’ll never forgive himself and that brings him to Gowan.

See, Vince wants to be like Zack, because it’s the one thing he can’t be. Therefore he wants an apology from Gowan, who says no. Gowan goes into a good rant about how he wants to be a wrestler and Vince is spitting on his dreams. All Gowan wants is a contract and Vince calmly gives him one. Well, with one condition: he has to join Vince’s special club. Vince takes his pants down but gets hit low instead. At least they kept it shorter here and stayed closer to the point, albeit with Vince losing his pants.

Ultimo Dragon vs. Shannon Moore

This is Dragon’s debut and Rey Mysterio is on commentary. Dragon spins out of a headscissors and a wristlock to start before kicking Moore away without much effort. Shannon gets sent outside so Dragon moonsaults back into the middle of the ring. Back in and Moore gets two off an elbow to the jaw before grabbing a chinlock.

Dragon fights up and hits a sloppy inverted hurricanrana/release victory roll (started in an electric chair and rolled forward). Shannon is sent outside again for an Asai moonsault and the New York fans are rather appreciative. A super jawbreaker sets up a standing backflip into a reverse DDT (basically a Salida Del Sol) to give Dragon the pin.

Rating: C-. This was way more competitive than it needed to be, especially with someone who has been hyped up as strongly as Dragon. I was never the biggest fan of his but he had a good finisher and a great looking moonsault, which is often all you need. If nothing else the division needs some fresh blood and a top challenger for Mysterio.

Rey and Dragon shake hands post match.

Kurt Angle/Brock Lesnar/Mr. America vs. Charlie Haas/Shelton Benjamin/Big Show

The USA chants start up (Tazz: “I don’t get this. Everybody in the ring is an American.”) until Angle and Haas start things off. The chants shift to Angle as he takes Charlie down for a far too early chinlock. Haas drags him into the corner though and it’s a good looking double dropkick to put Angle down. A crossbody gets Angle out of trouble as the fans want Hogan.

They’ll have to settle for Mr. America though for a clothesline, only to have Brock come in for some REAL clotheslines. Brock gorilla presses Haas as Tazz tries to get Manster over as a nickname. It’s back to America for a belly to back suplex and we take a break. Back with Lesnar cleaning house again and staring Big Show (who hasn’t done anything yet) down.

Benjamin breaks up an F5 on Haas and it’s the leapfrog over Haas and onto Lesnar’s back. Now Show will come in and Brock can’t slam him. Lesnar can however belly to back suplex him because physics are weird in wrestling. The hot tag brings in Angle to clean house with the release German suplexes (that’s very un-American of him). Show has to break up the ankle lock on Haas and it’s double teaming time again.

That lasts all of five seconds as Kurt gets in another suplex and brings America back in. Some right hands have Show rocked and Lesnar and Angle pull him outside. An F5/Angle Slam take out Haas and Benjamin, only to have Show come back in for a double chokeslam. That leaves America to take care of Show but here’s Vince carrying Gowan. The distraction lets Show chokeslam America for the pin.

Rating: C+. Not bad here, mainly because they mostly focused on Haas/Benjamin vs. Angle/Lesnar. America and Big Show could have a passable five minute match but they’re much better off saving them for short bursts like this. They still need to find someone else for Lesnar to face besides Big Show though as it’s getting repetitive. The other stuff was good though and that’s what matters most. I’m sure Mr. America will find something fresh to do soon enough.

Vince makes Gowan/Stephanie vs. Big Show for Gowan’s contract next week.

Overall Rating: C-. The first forty minutes or so were pretty dreadful but it picked up strongly enough in the second half to make it watchable. They’re getting to a point with the main story but the rest of the card is kind of all over the place. We still have no idea who is in the tournament and O’Haire/Piper are the best they have for challengers to the Tag Team Titles. It’s certainly better than Raw though and while that’s not much of a bar to clear, it’s better than nothing.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: 11 Takeaways From Survivor Series Weekend

It was 14 until I cut it down a bit.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-11-takeaways-survivor-series-weekend/




Survivor Series 2017: Never Mind The Talent. Here Are The Old Guys.

Survivor Series 2017
Date: November 19, 2017
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Booker T., Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

I could go for more of this idea of shows turning from kind of uninteresting into stacked. This is a double main event with Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown, plus AJ Styles vs. Brock Lesnar in a non-title match. That might not sound like much but when you have John Cena, HHH, Kurt Angle and Randy Orton in a match, there has to be something right. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Elias vs. Matt Hardy

Bonus match. Feeling out process to start with Matt working on a headlock before grabbing a Russian legsweep. Back from a break with Elias pull Matt’s throat into the top rope and then sending the shoulder into the apron. Elias stays on the arm with an armbar and right hands to the shoulder. We hit the armbar as this isn’t exactly setting the world on fire yet.

A double underhook shoulder breaker (basically a Pedigree lifted into a shoulder breaker) keeps Matt in trouble until he grabs a Side Effect on the apron. The rams into the buckle and a bulldog set up a regular Side Effect for two. The Twist of Fate doesn’t work though and Elias posts the bad arm. Drift Away gives Elias the pin at 9:10.

Rating: D+. The arm work was fine and I’m rather glad Elias won after not having much to do as of late, but what was the point in adding this? It’s a nothing match in front of a mostly empty arena that adds nothing to the show. The guys are trying to have a good match and they might as well be in a flea market for all the people they have watching. Just do the match on Raw where it belongs.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Enzo Amore

Amore is defending after they’ve traded the title. Before the match, Enzo talks about Kalisto sending him into the cake on Tuesday. Then he woke up and looked in the mirror, where he wished upon a star. Tonight, he wants to give Kalisto a beating and fry him up like a chicken so Enzo can be the only Chick-Fil-A open o a Sunday.

Enzo starts fast with some shoulders in the corner but Kalisto grabs a sunset bomb for two as we take an early break. Back with Enzo pulling him out of the corner into a side slam for a near fall of his own. A running forearm in the corner gets two and we’re off to the chinlock. Kalisto fights up with a headscissors though, followed by a Death Valley Bomb. The Salida Del Sol is blocked but so is a Jordunzo on the apron. Back in and Enzo sends him face first into an exposed buckle, setting up the Jordunzo to retain the title at 8:54.

Rating: D. For those of you keeping track, that would be back to back matches where the heel sends his opponent into something metal in the corner to set up their finisher. That’s bad agenting and I’d expect more out of WWE. I also expected nothing more than Enzo retaining here as Kalisto looked like a pretty lame duck challenger for the most part. Now we can get someone else to scare Enzo a bit before he cheats to retain the title. We’re just lucky that way I guess.

Kickoff Show: Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Breezango

Fandango dropkicks Owens outside to start and it’s time for some fashion tickets. It’s also time for a break less than forty seconds in. Back with Fandango chopping Sami but Breeze gets caught in the wrong corner. The chinlock doesn’t last very long so Owens comes in and grabs one of his own. Naturally it’s a long one because no one breaks his chinlock. Breeze fights up with a DDT and the hot tag brings in Fandango. Everything breaks down and Fandango misses the Last Dance, allowing Owens to hit the Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin at 8:28.

Rating: D+. I can’t imagine we won’t be seeing Owens and Zayn again later, which is exactly what the story calls for in this case. They’re major thorns in Shane McMahon’s side and it would be the right call. This match gives them a logical reason to be in the building and unfortunately it comes at Breezango’s expense. The Fashion Files haven’t been on in a few weeks and I’m not sure where Breezango can go without them. They’re good in the ring but those segments made them into much bigger stars. Just let them wrestle a win a bit though.

The opening video looks at all of the show vs. show matches, which is really the only way to open up a show like this.

New Day vs. Shield

Now that’s an opener. Before the match, New Day accuses Shield of ripping off their invasion idea. Shield might be the big dogs but New Day is about to go Bob Barker on them. The dogs are going to bite themselves as we get closer to Wrestlemania season. New Day would never do that because New Day rocks. Before we get going, here’s another video on the Sieges for reasons of WWE needing to make sure to play it as many times as possible.

Dean and Kofi get things going with Ambrose getting the better of it and handing it off to Rollins. Big E. comes in as well but since Rollins isn’t over losing the NXT Title to him a few years back, he brings Reigns in instead. A shoulder puts Reigns down but he’s right back up with a leapfrog into a Samoan drop.

Ambrose tags himself in though and everything breaks down with Shield getting the better of it. New Day gets clotheslined out to the floor until Woods is dragged back in for a Unicorn Stampede. The hot tag brings in Kofi for some chops and the Boom Drop on Ambrose. The real Unicorn Stampede has Ambrose in trouble and Woods’ dropkick in the corner makes things even worse.

Everything breaks down again with Cole saying a brawl would go to New Day. Big E. spears Ambrose through the ropes as Rollins and Reigns just kind of stand around. Back in and Ambrose breaks up a belly to belly superplex, allowing the hot tag to Rollins. A quick Blockbuster takes Kingston down and a Sling Blade gets two. Reigns comes in for a running clothesline, followed by a Superman Punch to Woods.

Dean makes a blind tag and it’s the wind-up knee into Dirty Deeds for two on Kofi with Big E. making a save. Everything breaks down again and Big E. breaks up the TripleBomb. Reigns gets sent into the steps and Trouble in Paradise drops Rollins. Back in and Big E. gets on Woods’ shoulders so Kofi can jump over them for a splash. Big E. is dropped into a second splash but they have to cut Rollins off instead of covering.

In a scary power display, Big E. scoops up Ambrose and Rollins for a double Midnight Hour, only to have Reigns spear Big E. into his partners for the save. Both teams go to a corner and come out swinging, leaving Ambrose to hit Dirty Deeds on Big E. on the floor. The spear cuts Kofi in half…..and Roman goes up? A SUPER TRIPLEBOMB ends Kofi at 21:33.

Rating: B. Oh yeah it worked. Shield winning is far from shocking but New Day got in some serious offense. It makes sense to have Shield get the win here as they don’t actually have the big win since reforming. They were beating the heck out of each other here and that’s how this show needed to start. Good stuff.

Stephanie (of course) gives the Raw Women’s Team a pep talk. Basically she wants every member to be awesome.

Raw Women’s Team vs. Smackdown Women’s Team

Raw: Alicia Fox, Nia Jax, Bayley, Sasha Banks, Asuka

Smackdown: Becky Lynch, Carmella, Tamina, Natalya, Naomi

Asuka gets an especially big entrance, which is exactly what she deserves. Becky and Alicia start things up with Fox being sent into the corner and dropped face first onto the buckle. Bayley makes a blind tag though and comes in to grab a rollup on Lynch for the pin at 2:34. Tamina comes in and drives Bayley into the corner, only to have Asuka come in and fire off some kicks.

Alicia tags herself back in and the beatdown commences. A hard shot finally knocks Bayley into the corner but she knocks her way free without too much trouble. Carmella gets in a superkick to drop Bayley though and Tamina’s top rope splash is good for the pin at 5:22. Nia comes in to face Tamina in the hoss (What’s female for hoss?) battle, including the big headbutt exchange.

Tamina gets powered into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs, only to have Nia rip her Raw shirt off. A big charge runs Tamina over for two but a Lana distraction lets Tamina hit back to back superkicks. Naomi dives onto Nia and a third superkick keeps her on the floor. Tamina adds a crossbody from the steps and beats the count to get rid of Nia at 8:55. It’s off to Naomi to slug away on Fox but she misses the split legged moonsault. Instead it’s a sunset flip for two, which the referee counts as three anyway, for the pin at 10:30. Banks comes in for the Bank Statement to get rid of Naomi at 10:55.

So it’s Banks/Asuka vs. Natalya/Carmella/Tamina, which better wind up as an Asuka showcase. Asuka comes in with a series of strikes and the hip attack for two on Carmella. A quick Bronco Buster stuns Asuka but Carmella makes the mistake of slapping her in the face. One heck of a kick to the head gets rid of Carmella at 12:51. Banks comes back in and grabs a Bank Statement on Natalya with Tamina making a save. The Sharpshooter gets rid of Banks at 15:07 and it’s Asuka vs. Natalya/Tamina.

The double teaming begins in a hurry but Tamina misses the top rope splash. Asuka slaps on a cross armbreaker to make Tamina tap at 17:28 and the Sharpshooter is quickly reversed into a kneebar. That’s broken up with some kicks to the ribs but Asuka kicks her in the head. The Asuka Lock is good for the final submission at 18:18.

Rating: D. And that’s being generous. This was a complete mess with the first six or so eliminations (out of nine remember) being there for the sake of being there. Asuka should have eliminated four or even all five members but instead let’s have Tamina look awesome (for some reason) and people like Becky and Bayley treated as afterthoughts (again). Terribly booked match here and unfortunately, I’m not all that surprised given how this division tends to go.

Stephanie and Daniel Bryan bicker, drawing up memories of Wrestlemania XXX with Stephanie talking in that way that ONLY SHE EVER TALKS. This goes on way too long (after a way too long WWE Network ad) as it’s almost like they’re filling time on a four hour show.

Baron Corbin vs. The Miz

Non-title but this is US Champion vs. Intercontinental Champion. Miz’s wife Maryse is in the front row and Corbin looks down at her, sending Miz into a frenzy. They fight outside with Miz sending him into the barricade, only to have Corbin do the same. Of course the announcers completely ignore this to talk about the wrestlers trying to fire up their brands backstage.

Corbin gets in a right hand but Bo Dallas clips his knee and Miz takes over again. The Figure Four is broken up in a hurry and a one legged Deep Six gives Corbin a near fall. Corbin pulls Curtis Axel inside but has to kick out of a rollup. The short DDT gets two more and it’s time for the YES Kicks. Miz hits the running corner dropkick but charges into End of Days for the pin at 9:21.

Rating: C+. Better match than I was expecting here and I’m rather glad given the effort they actually put into the build. There wasn’t much of a story here but they did what they could to put one together. Corbin needed the win more than Miz did, even though I’m never a fan of a champion losing clean like this. Good match too.

Corbin says he just shut Miz up.

Paul Heyman isn’t worried about AJ Styles being phenomenal. AJ may be the most phenomenal wrestler of this generation but he’s up against a conqueror.

The Bar vs. Usos

Same deal as Miz vs. Corbin but with tag teams. Before the match, the Usos say if Sheamus and Cesaro are the Bar, they’re pole vaulters. Sheamus, now with white tips on his mohawk, drives Jimmy into the corner to start but the twins take him down without much effort. As Graves and Booker argue over Booker winning Tag Team Titles (as usual, I have no idea why this is going on), Cesaro comes in with an uppercut.

Jimmy knocks both of them off the apron but gets caught in a Regal Roll on the floor. Cesaro slaps on a chinlock as Cole compares Sheamus’ hair to the Red Rooster. Oh come on man that’s low. Sheamus gets two off the Irish Curse and Cesaro kicks Jey off the apron to prevent a hot tag attempt. The hot tag works a few seconds later though and Jey comes in to clean house.

A running Umaga Attack gets two on Cesaro but Sheamus cuts Jimmy off. That means a jumping uppercut to Jey and we hit the Cesaro Swing into the Sharpshooter. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Jimmy down so Jey has to crawl over to the ropes for the break. That just means a super White Noise for two as Jimmy dives in for the save. Cesaro loads up a powerbomb and Sheamus goes up, only to have Jey grab him for a Samoan drop as Cesaro plants him.

That’s good for two on Sheamus as I’m still trying to figure out why Cesaro would do that. An enziguri finally allows the hot tag to Jimmy, who cleans house in a hurry. He dives over the top onto Cesaro but tags out on the way, leaving Jey to hit the Superfly Splash for the pin on Sheamus at 15:55.

Rating: B. This was good (albeit maybe a bit less than you would have expected) but SWEET GOODNESS stop acting like Raw vs. Smackdown is life and death. No one cares about this save for one month out of the year and it’s just obnoxious to hear for the whole show, especially with the announcers acting like their lives are on the line with every near fall.

Jason Jordan isn’t happy with not being on Team Raw but hopes they win. After HHH is eliminated that is.

We look back at Charlotte winning the Smackdown Women’s Title on Tuesday.

Charlotte vs. Alexa Bliss

Champion vs. champion again. Bliss bails to the floor to start and then hides in the ropes to avoid a right hand. Charlotte gets her arm snapped down off the apron and Bliss takes over for the first time. Back in and we hit the armbar with a stomach claw but Charlotte reverses into a rollup. The kickout sends her hard into the corner, only to have Charlotte hit something like a fall away slam into the corner.

Bliss sends her into the corner again though, setting up a top rope double knee drop to the back for a scary landing. Code Red gives Bliss two but she can’t grab the DDT. Instead it’s a guillotine choke with Bliss nearly crying as she tries to make Charlotte tap. Charlotte powers up into a Batista Bomb for two more, followed by Natural Selection for the same.

The moonsault misses though and Bliss’ DDT gets another near fall with Charlotte getting her foot on the ropes. A bad looking spear drops Bliss for no cover so Alexa comes back with a dropkick to the ribs. Twisted Bliss hits knees though and the Figure Eight makes Bliss tap at 15:40.

Rating: B+. I know Bliss is considered one of the weaker workers but sweet goodness she’s gotten a lot better in the ring as of late. Bliss looked like she belonged in there with a proven star like Charlotte and that’s a lot more than anyone would have believed was possible a year or so ago. Really good match here and a big surprise.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. AJ Styles in the final champion vs. champion match. Styles won the title less than two weeks ago while Lesnar has held his since Wrestlemania. There isn’t much of a story here but the question is can AJ overcome the monster.

AJ Styles vs. Brock Lesnar

Non-title in an idea you should get by now. Heyman handles Brock’s Big Match Intro as only he can do. The fans are split here as AJ is smart enough to not rush in. That’s fine with Brock who scores with the shoulders in the corner. Styles gets knocked down in the corner again so Lesnar drags him across the ring by the hair. One heck of a suplex has Styles rocked again and the German suplex makes things even worse.

AJ gets dumped over the top in a heap and Lesnar throws him into the announcers’ table. Back in and Brock hits another release German suplex as this is completely one sided. A running knee in the corner keeps AJ rocked and a shot to the face drops him again. Brock: “FIGHT ME!” AJ slugs away to no avail as a knee cuts him down. The F5 is escaped though and Brock misses a knee in the corner. AJ scores with a DDT and gets a much needed breather.

They botch a tornado DDT with AJ being shoved off and both guys are down again. The Pele puts Lesnar down again but Brock is right back up with another German suplex. AJ sends him outside though and the slingshot forearm has Lesnar in more trouble. They’re doing really well with the hope spots here. Brock gets sent knee first into the steps and there’s another running forearm.

Back in and AJ hits a Lionsault of all things, followed by the springboard 450 for a close two. Another F5 is countered into the Calf Crusher but Lesnar rams Styles’ head into the match for the break. Well that works. The F5 is escaped for the third time and the Phenomenal Forearm is good for two. AJ goes outside one too many times though and it’s the F5 for the pin at 15:16.

Rating: B+. In a way I was hoping Jinder would interfere and cost AJ the match as I’m still not a fan of the champs getting pinned clean. At least it was to Lesnar and in a great match though. Lesnar was trying out there and that’s probably more than you would have expected had Jinder been the opponent. This was the match I was hoping for though so we’ll call this a solid win.

Long recap of the main event. Smackdown invaded Raw, then they invaded again, then Raw invaded Smackdown. Let’s have an all-star elimination match.

Raw Men’s Team vs. Smackdown Men’s Team

Raw: Kurt Angle, Finn Balor, Samoa Joe, HHH, Braun Strowman

Smackdown: Shane McMahon, Bobby Roode, John Cena, Randy Orton, Shinsuke Nakamura

Shane charges at Strowman (so much for Angle promising to start the match) and gets LAUNCHED across the ring, freaking Shane out. It’s off to Orton vs. Joe with a shoulder dropping Orton like he’s nothing. Neither finisher can hit and it’s time for a standoff. Balor comes in to face Nakamura in what could be classified as a dream match. The fans chant NXT and then what sounds like USA until Nakamura takes him against the ropes for the head on the chest.

Nakamura misses a kick and has to avoid a double stomp, giving us a standoff. HHH comes in to face Nakamura, who tells him to COME ON. A kick to the face drops HHH as Cole keeps referring to Nakamura as Shin. The facebuster is somewhat botched as HHH winds up on his back, meaning it’s off to Roode. The slugout goes to Roode until he walks into a spinebuster. Roode grabs one of his own but can’t hit the Glorious DDT.

Instead it’s Angle (complete with stars and stripes gloves) coming in to roll some German suplexes. Nakamura comes in, gets in a cheap shot on Strowman, and strikes away at Kurt without much effort. Joe and Balor get dropped as well before HHH’s Pedigree attempt is countered into another kick to the head. Strowman gets in but Nakamura scores with a middle rope knee. Not that it matters as the running powerslam eliminates Nakamura at 11:22.

Roode comes in next with the Blockbuster for no count as Braun kicks him away before one. A second attempt misses though and the second running powerslam makes it 5-3 at 12:22. Joe tags himself in and it’s time for an argument. Smackdown is smart enough to let HHH and Angle nearly come to blows until Orton breaks it up. Shane gets to slug it out with Joe but Orton powerslams Joe down. Everyone clears out until it’s Orton/Cena vs. Strowman for a heck of a showdown. Strowman gets knocked outside but Cena gets dropped with a single right hand.

It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but Shane comes over to help (along with Nakamura, who is still here for some reason) with a triple suplex to drive Strowman through. Joe (who, along with Strowman’s partners, didn’t fall into a hole somewhere) breaks up Shane’s elbow, only to have Cena come in for a running clothesline. A big boot puts Cena in the corner and the Rock Bottom out of the corner looks to finish him…..until Balor and Joe get in an argument. The AA plants both guys and a second gets rid of Joe at 18:04.

Angle comes in to face Cena with Kurt taking him down rather easily. The slugout draws the BOO/YAY chants and Cena scores with a ProtoBomb. Angle picks the ankle though and it’s an Angle Slam for two. The Coup de Grace sets up another Angle Slam and Cena is gone at 21:55. So it’s Orton/Shane vs. Strowman/Balor/HHH/Angle. Balor kicks away at Orton but makes sure to dropkick Shane into the barricade. Another shotgun dropkick looks to set up the Coup de Grace but Orton rolls away, setting up the RKO to get rid of Balor at 23:35.

HHH comes in and gets shoved into the ropes to crotch Angle on top. Cue Owens and Sami to go after Shane (as you knew was coming) but the boss fights them off with a chair. Strowman comes in to go after Orton and the running powerslam makes it 3-1 at 26:35. Shane is all alone now and stays on the floor with no counting from the referee. Strowman is waiting on Shane until HHH tags himself in instead. Cole thinks brother vs. brother-in-law is the MOST AMAZING THING HE’S SEEN IN THE LAST FIVE MINUTES but Angle tags himself in instead.

A Russian legsweep gets two on Angle and the jumping back elbow gets the same. There’s the Angle Slam into the ankle lock with Shane looking at the ropes and then crawling back into the middle of the ring. And then HHH breaks it up and Pedigrees Angle to give Shane the pin at 32:02. Strowman stares HHH down as Shane is holding his ankle. That’s about it though as HHH Pedigrees Shane for the pin at 34:18.

Rating: D. Well that was awful. Much like in the women’s match, most of the people were just there to fill in spots while the stars (read as the old people) were all that mattered. They had me believing that Shane might be the sole survivor out there and somehow, that wasn’t the most impossible thing in the world. This was terrible for the most part, outside of the opening ten minutes or so where they were just doing crazy combinations. After that though, this was ALL about Raw and the McMahons looking awesome, which was the last thing this show needed to do. Really bad booking to what should have been awesome.

Post match HHH celebrates as Strowman looks confused. Strowman grabs him by the throat and chokes him in the corner, telling HHH to never try to play him again. A Pedigree attempt is swatted away and back to back running powerslams end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. So to recap, the elimination matches were awful and everything else ranged from very good to awesome. It’s like they know the one big idea they want to go with (Asuka looking awesome, which worked, and whatever the ending to that main event was, which didn’t work) but have no idea how to get there. The booking was all over the place tonight and that made for a very trying evening at times.

However, the good stuff, which thankfully was a lot more common than the bad, was quite good with the champion vs. champion matches all delivering, plus a very solid Shield vs. New Day match. It made for a good theme to the show, despite the rather annoying build that it took to get there. That word annoying brings us to the real problem with this show.

The commentary tonight might have been the most annoying I’ve ever heard it be, including the days of heel Michael Cole. All night long it was this stupid “my show is better than your show” nonsense which adds nothing to the show and feels like they’re just running their mouths for the sake of an idea. It came off like forcing a concept into the show and that got old in about five minutes. Saxton was annoying, Booker sounded stupid, and Cole put on his old cheerleading uniform. It was a major problem, though thankfully not enough to knock a good show off course.

Results

Shield b. New Day – Super TripleBomb to Kingston

Raw Women’s Team b. Smackdown Women’s Team – Asuka Lock to Natalya

Baron Corbin b. The Miz – End of Days

Usos b. The Bar – Superfly Splash to Sheamus

Charlotte b. Alexa Bliss – Figure Eight

Brock Lesnar b. AJ Styles – F5

Raw Men’s Team b. Smackdown Men’s Team – Pedigree to McMahon

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 2016 (2017 Redo): I’m Mellowing In My Old Age

Survivor Series 2016
Date: November 20, 2016
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 17,143
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, David Otunga

I say this every year but it’s always hard to believe that it’s been a full year since this show. This was the first time that a Survivor Series was expanded to four hours but thankfully there’s a good chance that they could make it work, mainly due to the elimination matches. The main event though is Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg, which I’m sure will be completely uneventful. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Drew Gulak/Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese vs. Noam Dar/TJ Perkins/Rich Swann

This is a preview match for something called 205 Live, which debuts next week. I know it hasn’t gone great but the division really has evolved into a better place than when it started. Swann gets a nice reaction and then starts with Nese, who gets chopped in the corner. They do their regular flips with Swann’s jump over Nese’s feet getting a good pop (as always) before it’s off to Perkins.

Some suplexes set up an Octopus Hold but Nese reverses into a kind of gutwrench suplex. Gulak comes in and gets caught in the wrong corner with everyone working him over. We actually get a TJ PERKINS chant as he slaps on the kneebar to keep Gulak in trouble. Everything breaks down and we take a break.

Back with Daivari in trouble this time as Dar gets two off a running kick to the face. Nese offers a distraction though and a spinebuster takes Dar down. A superkick gives Daivari two and it’s back to Gulak to crank on the leg. If this sounds rather uninteresting, it’s only because that’s what it is.

Dar dropkicks his way to freedom and the hot tag brings in Swann to very little reaction. A good looking jumping hurricanrana takes Daivari off the middle rope as everything breaks down again. That means we hit the dives but the referee CUTS PERKINS OFF. Now you know that’s not working so Perkins dives over the referee to take out some villains. Back in and Swann’s standing 450 ends Daivari at 11:48.

Rating: C-. I forgot how uninteresting these earlier cruiserweight matches were. The guys barely have characters and the entire story here was “three faces vs. three heels”. It didn’t get much better for a long time but, as usual, the problem comes down to one simple thing: if the smaller guys on the main roster can be big stars and do all these dives, why should I be impressed when cruiserweights can do them too?

Kickoff Show: Luke Harper vs. Kane

Harper is part of the NEW Wyatt Family, which screwed Kane over, meaning we need a match here. Kane grabs a full nelson of all things and we’re in a chinlock fifteen seconds in. That goes nowhere so Harper grabs a headlock as the fans are oddly split here. Kane starts in on the shoulder by sending it into the buckle. Harper sends him outside though and hits that suicide shove of his (Who needs cruiserweights?).

A slingshot flip splash gives Luke two and we take a break. Back with Kane in a chinlock (well duh) but managing to superplex Harper down for a crash. The sidewalk slam gets two but Harper scores with a superkick for the same. Kane’s running DDT and Harper’s Boss Man Slam are good for two more each but it’s the chokeslam to put Harper away at 9:10.

Rating: D+. Well what were you expecting here? This was exactly the match you would have planned out for them and Kane won with his finisher. It’s about as paint by numbers of a power match as you can get and while it wasn’t terrible, it’s also a match I really didn’t need to see.

The opening video looks at Goldberg vs. Lesnar and then all the Raw vs. Smackdown matches. Well at least they got some time. I’m sure Stephanie’s voiceovers had nothing to do with it.

Raw Women’s Team vs. Smackdown Women’s Team

Raw: Bayley, Alicia Fox, Charlotte, Nia Jax, Sasha Banks

Smackdown: Alexa Bliss, Becky Lynch, Carmella, Naomi, Nikki Bella

Entrances alone take forever of course, which will be a theme tonight. Charlotte is Raw Women’s Champion and has Dana Brooke in her corner. Becky is Smackdown Women’s Champion but Nikki is captain. You know, because of course. Bliss gets a heck of a reaction (gee I wonder why). Actually hang on a second as there’s no Nikki. We cut to the back where she’s down after being attacked. Not to worry though, as Smackdown coach Natalya is more than willing to take the spot.

We settle down to Becky and Banks trading rollups before it’s off to Charlotte for more of the same. Becky can’t get the Disarm-Her and it’s off to Nia as things get a lot more difficult. Carmella and Bliss come in for the expected results and Naomi’s high crossbody is pulled out of the air. Natalya actually gets a reaction but Nia clotheslines her head off for her efforts. It’s off to Fox vs. Carmella with Alicia avoiding a Bronco Buster, setting up what looked to be a mostly missed ax kick for the elimination at 6:35. Bliss comes right in, sends Fox into the buckle and adds Twisted Bliss to tie it up at 6:48.

Charlotte and Naomi come in with the latter cleaning house, including knocking Nia outside and hitting a high crossbody to the floor. Nia posts her though and that’s a countout at 8:23. We pause for the Tye Dillinger TEN chant until Bliss takes Banks down and grinds her face into the mat. Banks sends Bliss and Natalya into each other, followed by the double knees in the corner to Alexa. Back up and Bliss saves Natalya from the Bank Statement, allowing Natalya to roll Banks up for the elimination at 10:20.

Charlotte comes in and gets suplexed, meaning we hit the SUPLEX CITY chants. You would think fans would know more chants than that. Charlotte goes up for the moonsault but, as always, Natalya powerbombs her down for two in the near fall that never ends Charlotte. The required Sharpshooter sends Charlotte crawling for the ropes but a big boot ends Natalya at 12:01.

Becky and Bliss get in an argument over who should come in, allowing Jax to suplex them both at the same time. Of course that gets a MAMA MIA from Mauro, which I miss hearing so often. Bliss gets caught in a slam but Becky makes a blind tag and missile dropkicks Bliss in the back to knock her onto Jax. The Disarm-Her actually makes Jax tap at 13:35 and it’s 2-2 with Becky/Bliss vs Charlotte/Bayley.

Jax mauls Becky, leaving Bliss to get big booted down for the elimination at 14:03. Becky fights back as fast as she can with the series of clotheslines into the leg lariat, followed by Bexplex. Bayley has to dive in for a save after a top rope legdrop before coming in for the slugout. Another Bexplex gets two but Bayley’s elbow to the back gets the same. You can tell Becky is getting tired out there so Bayley blocks the Disarm-Her and grabs the Bayley to Belly for the final pin at 17:53.

Rating: C+. The quick eliminations didn’t help things here but the ending was the right call. There was way too much talent on the Raw side to lose and I’m VERY glad it was Natalya, who can wrestle this style without having to dumb things down too much. Becky was pretty much all the blue team had for a lot of the match and she put up a valiant effort, only to be outgunned. That makes her look strong and Bayley getting a win like this is a good thing for her at this stage in her main roster career.

Charlotte takes Bayley out post match and beats her around ringside.

Smackdown mascot James Ellsworth runs into Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows, who weren’t funny in 2016 either. They make some bad chin puns but Raw GM Mick Foley comes in to run them off. Ellsworth talks about all the great memories he has of Foley, most of which involve him being in extreme pain. Foley thanks him anyway and suggests Ellsworth move to Raw. He appreciates the offer but politely turns it down because he’s true blue. Foley leaves and Ellsworth runs into Braun Strowman, who asks if he knows Ellsworth. James runs in a smart move.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Miz is defending and Sami is trying to take the title to Raw. We get the Big Match Intros and Sami gets quite the reaction for being Canadian. Sami spins out of a wristlock to start and Miz looks annoyed in the corner. Miz gets sent outside but Sami has to bail out of the flip dive. The moonsault off the barricade works though, drawing over Maryse for a distraction. Well she can be quite distracting.

This one works well with Miz taking out the knee to get his first advantage. Some hard stomps to the knees have Sami in trouble but he’s still able to clothesline Miz to the floor. A flip dive works as well, followed by a Michinoku Driver for two. Miz’s short DDT gets the same and it’s time for a double breather. The running corner dropkick/clothesline look to set up the ax handle but Sami reverses into the Blue Thunder Bomb.

The Helluva Kick only hits corner though and that means the Figure Four. This one stays on for a good while until Sami makes the ropes, earning himself some YES Kicks. Sami reverses one into a Figure Four of his own but Maryse rings the bell. Since Sami isn’t all that bright, he of course falls for it, only to have Miz roll him up to retain at 14:06.

Rating: C-. Kind of a dull match as you knew a lot of Sami’s near falls weren’t going anywhere. I can go for Miz and Maryse teaming up to steal wins though and it’s a big reason why he’s been an awesome Intercontinental Champion. This would also help play into Sami’s heel turn nearly a year later as he would get tired of losing while playing by the rules. Makes sense, especially in a long term form.

Dean Ambrose and AJ Styles are bickering over being teammates tonight when Shane McMahon comes in and tells them to cool it so Smackdown doesn’t lose again.

Raw Tag Teams vs. Smackdown Tag Teams

Raw: Enzo Amore/Big Cass, Cesaro/Sheamus, Gallows and Anderson, New Day, Shining Stars

Smackdown: American Alpha, Breezango, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Hype Bros, Usos

A fall eliminates both members of a team. Enzo and Cass suck up to the live crowd, as you might expect. New Day and Slater/Rhyno are the respective champions. Fandango tries to give everyone a fashion ticket to start, earning himself a Midnight Hour for the elimination at 44 seconds. New Day spends too much time celebrating though and it’s a superkick from Jimmy to pin Big E. at 1:08.

Gallows comes in to punch Jimmy in the face before handing it off to Cass for the tall power. The fast tags continue as it’s off to Epico vs. Ryder (who is rocking some old school Survivor Series logo trunks) with Mojo coming in for a clap around the ears. Rawley gets taken down into the corner for the huge group beating though as we keep trying to get everyone in. It’s back to Ryder (not Slater like the fans want) but Gallows saves Anderson from the Broski Boot. Instead it’s the Magic Killer to pin Ryder at 5:08.

Gable comes in as Graves talks about how scared he is of American Alpha. It doesn’t seem to be the most valid fear to start though as Epico takes Gable down into a chinlock. Some rolling suplexes have Gable in more trouble and Primo comes in with a springboard ax handle to the ribs. He misses a charge in the corner though and it’s off to Jordan for a quick Steiner Bulldog to get rid of the Stars at 8:08.

The six remaining teams (Enzo/Big Cass, Cesaro/Sheamus, Gallows and Anderson vs. American Alpha, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Usos) come in at once as everything breaks down. That means Enzo gets tossed over the top onto a big pile….which was mainly Raw guys but whatever. Rhyno gets thrown over the top as well, only to have Slater add an even bigger dive. Back in and Cesaro swings Jordan but Gable makes the save with a Rolling Chaos Theory.

Gable isn’t done though as Jordan throws him over the top for a HUGE flip dive onto everyone. Sweet goodness those two were awesome together. I mean, not as awesome as Jordan on his own with Kurt Angle kind of around but still. Back in and it’s a quick Magic Killer to get rid of Jordan at 10:39 as the eliminations are still flying. A spinebuster plants Slater and he’s caught in the wrong corner.

Sheamus won’t tag Cesaro (this was before their ridiculous matching outfits) and an argument breaks out, allowing the hot tag off to Rhyno as everyone bickers. Rhyno comes in and Gores Gallows for an elimination at 12:28. Cass wastes no time with a big boot to Rhyno, followed by the Bada Boom Shaka Lacka for the pin at 12:45.

That leaves us with the Usos….who superkick Enzo down to set up the Superfly Splash and an elimination at 13:26 before I can type the Raw teams. So now we’re down to the Usos vs. Cesaro/Sheamus with the latter hitting the ten forearms (you know the chant) on Jimmy. Cesaro comes in and eats a double superkick but Sheamus Brogue kicks Jimmy with Jey making a diving save.

Super White Noise plants Jimmy again but Jey is right back with a Superfly Splash for two with Cesaro making a save of his own. The hot tag brings in Cesaro for the Uppercut Train and a 619 as the fans lose their minds over Cesaro again. A high crossbody gets two on Jey and it’s time for the Swing. Jimmy breaks up the Sharpshooter and Jey gets the Tequila Sunrise. That’s reversed right back into the Sharpshooter with Sheamus remembering he’s in the match to cut off Jimmy, leaving Jey to tap at 18:55.

Rating: B. This was during the time that I couldn’t stand Sheamus and Cesaro (not a lot has changed in a year) but they did a lot of stuff in this match, despite the crunched timeline. Getting nine eliminations in less than nineteen minutes is a lot but you have to clear the ring out at the beginning. It’s entertaining, but hits a hard ceiling that it’s not getting past.

Stephanie and Foley decide that Sheamus and Cesaro should get a Tag Team Title shot tomorrow night. They recap the rest of the show with Stephanie getting way too serious, as usual.

Preview for TLC with Dean Ambrose vs. AJ Styles in a TLC match for the title.

Cruiserweight Champion Brian Kendrick does his best Sean O’Haire impression and is ready for Kalisto. If Kalisto wins, he brings the division to Smackdown. It’s fine for a one off match but it was really hard to buy Kendrick as the best cruiserweight in the company in 2016.

Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Kendrick is defending and charges straight into a knee to the face. Kalisto is right back with a suicide dive, followed by a springboard corkscrew crossbody for two. Some rollups give Kalisto more near falls and a shotgun dropkick has Kendrick in even more trouble. A rollup into the corner finally gives Kendrick a breather and he crushes Kalisto between the steps and the apron for good measure.

Back in and we hit the cravate to slow things back down. Kalisto manages to fight up and get to the apron where he grabs a C4 out to the floor in the big crash of the match. A good looking suicide dive takes Kendrick down again but he reverses a super Salida Del Sol into the Captain’s Hook. Kalisto finally grabs the ropes and fires off some kicks, followed by the hurricanrana driver. The Salida Del Sol gets two with Kendrick getting to the ropes. Kalisto heads up top….and here’s Baron Corbin for the DQ at 12:21.

Rating: C-. The match was good at times but Kendrick really isn’t the kind of guy you want as a long term champion. It also didn’t help that you knew they weren’t changing up the cruiserweight division so close to 205 Live’s launch. Corbin interfering was fine enough, but it really does make the title match feel like a big waste of time.

The Kickoff Show panel recaps the show so far.

Daniel Bryan yells at Corbin, who doesn’t want little pests running around on Smackdown.

We recap the men’s Survivor Series match, which started in July at the second Brand Split. Naturally this is about the McMahons as Shane and Stephanie are the Commissioners and therefore they have to be fighting. We look at all the entrants as this is treated like the major match is should be treated as. Then Shane is added to the match and that notion kind of falls apart.

Raw Men’s Team vs. Smackdown Men’s Team

Raw: Braun Strowman, Chris Jericho, Kevin Owens, Roman Reigns

Seth Rollins

Smackdown: AJ Styles, Bray Wyatt, Dean Ambrose, Randy Orton, Shane McMahon

AJ and Owens are the World Champions, Reigns is US Champion and Ellsworth is here as the mascot. This is also during the period where Orton is part of the Wyatt Family because we needed that story to get to Orton as World Champion again. Rollins gets a nice reaction and it’s far better without BURN IT DOWN or whatever the line is. AJ and Owens start things off with Styles wasting no time in hitting the drop down into the dropkick.

That’s enough of that though as it’s and they slug it out with AJ getting the better of it. The STUPID IDIOT chants mean it’s time for Jericho, who throws his shirt at AJ and hammers away. Styles dropkicks him down again as the announcers discuss Jericho insulting Undertaker on Twitter. It’s off to Ambrose vs. Rollins, which turns into far more of a wrestling match than it should.

Rollins can’t get a Pedigree so let’s go back to Jericho. Chris yells at Dean for the $15,000 jacket issue, earning himself some really bad armdrags. An enziguri cuts Dean down for two but Ambrose is right back with a bunch of right hands to the head. Shane comes in for the first time and my interest goes down. I’m still not a fan of middle aged Shane and this isn’t likely to change things.

Shane’s bad punches and an armdrag (better than Dean’s) take Jericho down until a dropkick cuts him off. The announcers debate the TV ratings as Reigns comes in and gets booed out of the building. Roman hammers him down in the corner and Seth comes in for a chinlock. That’s broken up so let’s go with Dean vs. Kevin. Owens hits a superkick but gets caught in a hurricanrana, only to have Jericho break up Dirty Deeds.

Everything breaks down and Strowman tags himself in, leaving the fans to chant for Ellsworth. The fight heads outside with Dean being left alone in the ring until Strowman catches his slingshot dive. Strowman walks him around the ring until AJ’s slingshot forearm to the floor breaks it up. Owens dives onto everyone and Strowman tosses Shane across the ring in a pretty good power display.

Some double teaming doesn’t do much to stop Strowman but they manage to knock him outside. That’s enough of Dean and Ambrose working together so they get in a fight, allowing Strowman to hit the running powerslam for the pin on Dean at 15:57. AJ was looking right at the cover and didn’t move. Shane gets to beat on Strowman for a bit but thankfully he gets hammered down as well.

The Phenomenal Forearm is pulled out of the air with AJ being tossed outside in a nasty heap. Orton gets thrown aside too but a stare from Bray stops Strowman in his tracks. Strowman grabs Jericho by the throat but decides to run Bray over instead, followed by a dropkick to put him on the floor. Braun goes outside as well but runs into an RKO onto the announcers’ table. After we pause to see what a random eight year old fan thought of it (he was applauding), Shane drops the top rope elbow to put Strowman through said table. That and Ellsworth grabbing Braun’s foot get Strowman counted out at 21:18.

Strowman catches Ellsworth running up the ramp though (How slow is this guy?) and throws him off the stage through some tables. Everyone else is mostly dead until Jericho covers Shane for two. Owens is fresh enough to drop the backsplash on Shane for two (but only after mocking the dance). There’s the Lionsault but Shane gets two of his own off a small package.

Shane takes a Codebreaker but Orton comes in before the cover, meaning Shane survives another finisher. He avoids a top rope splash though and it’s off to AJ to work on Jericho. With Owens getting in an insult to AJ’s hair (too far man), Jericho counters the Styles Clash into a failed Walls attempt. The Phenomenal Blitz rocks Jericho but Owens comes in with the List of Jericho to blast AJ. That’s a DQ at 29:23, but not before he gives AJ a Pop Up Powerbomb.

Orton gets the tag and comes in with the RKO to get rid of Jericho at 30:19. Notice Reigns blankly staring up at the ramp and not hearing the RKO RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. So it’s down to Shane/AJ/Orton/Wyatt vs. Reigns/Rollins with Orton hammering on Rollins to start. Wyatt and Orton take turns on Seth as Shane is still laid on the apron after his long time in the ring. The superplex takes Rollins down (looks great too) but it allows the hot tag to Reigns. AJ comes in as well and MY GOODNESS the fans do not like Reigns.

House is cleaned with a series of Samoan drops, followed by a great looking Razor’s Edge powerbomb for two on AJ. Seriously that was good enough to cut off the booing. A Pele cuts off a Superman Punch and it’s back to Shane for no logical reason. Shane gets in a tornado DDT to drop Reigns and a clothesline takes Rollins down. Reigns tries a spear but gets awkwardly countered into the post.

In probably the spot of the match, Shane loads up Coast to Coast but gets speared out of the air for a SICK landing. Shane actually kicks out at two but you can see that he is completely gone. Like Lesnar after the botched shooting star gone. The referee says Shane is eliminated at 37:07, presumably due to his brains looking like a pie that has been run over by a bus driven by raccoons.

We pause for a bit as doctors get Shane out of the ring until Roman blasts Bray with a clothesline. Rollins and AJ get stereo hot tags with Seth’s Blockbuster putting Styles down. There’s the slingshot knee to AJ and a suicide dive to Wyatt. With Reigns down on the floor, let’s hit that ROMAN’S SLEEPING chant! Still one of my favorites because the fans just will not give him a break no matter what. An enziguri staggers AJ on top and now it’s WAKE UP ROMAN. Reigns does in fact wake up and saves Rollins from a hanging DDT on the floor.

With Orton down, it seems as good a time as any for a DoubleBomb. Styles makes a save before it can be loaded up but here’s Ambrose to jump Styles again. The fans call Dean a STUPID IDIOT as the former Shield beats up security. NOW the TripleBomb puts AJ through the table, allowing Rollins to get the pin at 47:00. It’s down to two on two with the Wyatts vs. the Shield (not the worst idea in the world)….and here’s Luke Harper for a distraction so the Wyatts can take over.

Reigns posts Orton but Harper superkicks him down, only to have Rollins score with a flip dive to the floor. Back in and the low superkick hits Wyatt but he dives into an RKO, giving Bray the pin at 49:25. Reigns, all alone, sends both of them outside and takes Harper out as a bonus. Back in and Orton eats a spear to save Wyatt, leaving Bray to grab Sister Abigail for the pin at 52:50.

Rating: A. This is a great example of a match that benefits from all of the time it had. What I loved about this was how long it took to take someone out. Most of the people in here were former World Champions and it doesn’t make sense to have them losing in a minute or two like in the other matches. They let the match build up for a change and that’s what makes this feel important.

Above all else though, this felt like someone surviving instead of whoever was left last. Look at the women’s match. Bayley barely looked like she had been through anything at the end. Orton and Wyatt looked banged up, which is how they should after a match like this. It’s a well put together match that got the kind of time it needed, which is exactly how something like this should be. Really strong stuff here with Bray, who actually needed it, getting the win.

We recap Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar. Goldberg was being interviewed about being in WWE2K16 and said he didn’t owe Lesnar a rematch. Lesnar challenged him though and Goldberg wanted his son to see him wrestle. The match was on and it does indeed feel like a battle of two people who could kill each other.

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

We get the full Goldberg entrance, complete with someone knocking on his door. Lesnar drives him into the corner to start but Goldberg shoves him right back down, scaring the heck out of Lesnar in the process. Back up and the spear connects to drop Lesnar again. There’s a second spear, followed by a Jackhammer to give Goldberg the huge upset at 1:25.

Yeah I still don’t like it. Sure it was shocking and a huge moment, but what did this set up? Goldberg eliminating Lesnar from the Rumble, Goldberg getting the most unnecessary Universal Title reign ever, and then a good sub five minute match at Wrestlemania. One of WWE’s biggest issues is giving fans something to cheer for and they give this spot to Goldberg, who they didn’t even create, for the sake of a video game (might not have been their call) and a story that could have made someone’s career. After this, Samoa Joe and Braun Strowman both fell to Lesnar, but Goldberg doesn’t. I don’t buy it, nor to I like it.

Goldberg celebrates with his family to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. One of the major perks about a match running nearly an hour on a three and a half hour show is that it can REALLY bring an overall rating up. Throw in a good women’s match and nothing really bad, this is actually a strong show. It’s far from perfect (main event aside, though that was the only thing that could have closed the show) but it’s a heck of a card, which I can always go for of course. The main issue is they could have gotten this one under three hours so it’s a bit long but nothing too bad. Really solid show though and most of that is due to the mega long match.

Ratings Comparison

Rich Swann/Noam Dar/TJ Perkins vs. Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese/Drew Gulak

Original: C

Redo: C-

Kane vs. Luke Harper

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Women’s Survivor Series Match

Original: C

Redo: C+

Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Tag Team Survivor Series Match

Original: D+

Redo: B

Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Original: C

Redo: C-

Men’s Survivor Series Match

Original: A-

Redo: A

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: B+

My eyebrows went up when I saw the original overall rating. The year of mellowing on the ending have helped a lot as there’s no way this is a B-. Also I really couldn’t stand Sheamus and Cesaro back then.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/11/20/survivor-series-2016-there-are-no-words/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – June 19, 2003: One Of The Most Out There Things The McMahons Have Ever Done

Smackdown
Date: June 19, 2003
Location: SBC Center, San Antonio, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

So after last week’s main event saw Big Show and Brock Lesnar break the ring, it’s probably time to set up a rematch because these two have to be stuck fighting each other forever. Other than that Kurt Angle is back and full on face again, having fired Team Angle. There are some good stories going on around here at the moment so let’s get to it.

We open with a look at the superplex. I was worried it would be the arm wrestling.

Opening sequence.

Show gets his rematch for the title tonight.

Undertaker vs. Nunzio

Rating: D-. So you know all those times where Undertaker beat up the FBI? This is the third one in a row. I’m not sure what the point of wasting Undertaker for the better part of two months like this is but I’m sure there’s a reason for it somewhere. Nothing match of course and just a squash.

Post match the beatdown is on but the APA of all people return (with Bradshaw sporting horrible looking blond hair) for the save. You know, because Undertaker needs help with the FBI.

Zack Gowan goes to Stephanie McMahon’s office but finds Sable instead. He’ll wait inside though.

Clip of Paul Heyman turning on Lesnar at Survivor Series because Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar is a big enough feud to get a history package throughout the night.

Rhyno and Chris Benoit come out for a tag match….and here’s Stephanie to say let’s make it a singles match. Eh we might as well make it a first round match in a tournament for the US Title, with the finals taking place in July at Vengeance.

US Title Tournament First Round: Chris Benoit vs. Rhyno

Benoit’s armbar doesn’t go anywhere so let’s hit a GO SPURS GO chant with Tazz sounding a bit annoyed. A headlock doesn’t seem to bore the crowd as much but Rhyno would rather drive Benoit into the corner. Some kicks send Rhyno bailing to the floor and we take a break. Back with Rhyno grabbing a half crab and taking over the heel role.

An Alley Oop into the corner drops Benoit again and gets a gasp from the Spurs happy fans. Another hard clothesline drops Benoit and a powerslam is good for two. We hit the chinlock as the crowd is gone again, albeit without the chanting. This goes on WAY too long, much like the match as a whole actually. Rhyno tells his partner to fight back, which Benoit does for a few clotheslines.

A snap suplex gets two but the German suplex has a bit more impact. The Swan Dive connects (with a nasty looking landing) for another near fall, only to have Rhyno come back with a DDT. That means both guys get to stay down even more, which continues to feel like stalling. An ax handle to the back gives Rhyno two but he charges into the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: D+. The match could have been worse but the time killed everything here. There’s no need for them to be out there for sixteen minutes with a long chinlock taking up so much of that time. Benoit vs. Rhyno wasn’t going to tear the house down but throwing it in the first round of a surprise tournament probably wasn’t the best usage of whatever they could have gotten from the thing.

Benoit takes his sweet time letting go and Rhyno isn’t interested in his help getting up. As he shouldn’t be.

Sable lets Gowan touch her chest. It’s as awkward as you can imagine it being.

Ultimo Dragon is here next week.

Rey Mysterio vs. Kanyon

Non-title of course. This is Kanyon’s first match on one of the main shows since October 2001 and he doesn’t even get an entrance. Kanyon gets sent outside early on but manages to catch Rey and drop him onto the barricade. Back in and Kanyon counters another springboard into a backbreaker and we hit a chinlock. Kanyon tries a superplex but Rey knocks him back, setting up a top rope seated senton for two of his own. A springboard moonsaults gives Rey two more and the West Coast Pop gives Rey the pin.

Rating: C. Maybe it was the lack of a character or this match (which was hardly terrible) but, outside of a battle royal at the upcoming pay per view, that’s Kanyon’s last match on the main roster. You would think they could find something for him to do but apparently not quite. Mysterio winning here was of course the right call and gives him something to do while we wait for him to find a new feud for the title.

Lesnar cost Big Show the title at Armageddon.

Here’s the former Team Angle, now in matching maroon singlets. Benjamin says they’re not about to come crawling back to Angle for a spot on the team. The name Angle was holding them back because Kurt represents everything they’re not. Haas challenges Angle for next week but here’s Kurt now instead. That’s quite the prompt response. Angle says maybe they’re right and maybe they are the best tag team period. There are only two words that Angle takes exception to though: next week. Angle is ready to go right now.

Kurt Angle vs. Charlie Haas

Impromptu match. Angle takes him down without too much effort and the fans are behind the returning hero. A keylock keeps Haas in trouble and Angle throws him down without much effort. Haas’ headlock only has a limited effect until Angle reverses into a catapult to send Charlie outside in a heap.

Back in and Haas slaps him in the face, which draws a rather unpleasant smile to Angle’s face. Haas sends him outside again though, meaning Angle smiled prematurely. With the nitwit referee distracted, Benjamin sends Angle into the steps, earning himself an ejection. Ok so maybe we’ll go with moron instead of nitwit.

Back from a break with Haas working on the shoulder which went into the steps. Angle fights up and slugs away before channeling his inner Shawn Michaels for a flying forearm. A German suplex cuts Angle off though and Haas takes down the straps. You don’t steal gimmicks though, meaning Kurt reverses an Angle Slam and hits one of his own for the pin.

Rating: C+. Nice match here with the guys getting time, mainly for the sake of Angle getting back into the swing of things. Haas is a good choice for an opponent in the comeback match as Angle knows the style well and won’t make too many mistakes. This was all it needed to be and entertained as a bonus.

Post match Haas and Benjamin beat Angle down until Lesnar makes the save.

Back on Halloween, Big Show chokeslammed Lesnar through the announcers’ table. Is there a reason we’re going back in time on these clips?

Sable kisses Gowan and shoves everything off of Stephanie’s desk. Gowan says her name and shows how horrible of an actor he is as the camera leans over Sable’s shoulder. Sable cuts him off though and asks if Gowan is crazy. He could never have a woman like her because he’s not a real man. Vince comes in and sends Gowan away. They break down in laughter with Vince saying Sable was great.

Billy Gunn vs. Jamie Noble

The guys take turns spanking their respective ladies because the writers of this show seem rather sexually frustrated. A Torrie chant breaks out as the guys fight over a wristlock. The announcers talk about Torrie looking better than Tony Chimmel and now the fans want puppies. Noble grabs a leglock as the announcers are happy with various camera shots of Torrie. Billy fights up but the leg gives out on a gorilla press. It’s fine enough for a Fameasser attempt but Nidia grabs Billy’s leg. The catfight is on until Billy breaks it up, followed by the Fameasser for the pin.

Rating: D. I know Billy has a good look and all that jazz but sweet goodness how many more times do I have to hear about how great he is while listening to that stupid song? It was fun while he was a comedy goof but they’re treating him like something serious, which makes the whole gimmick even more ridiculous. You can’t have it both ways and the fact that Gunn just isn’t all that great doesn’t help things.

Lesnar beat Big Show in a stretcher match.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Sean O’Haire

Roddy Piper has a bottle of tequila with him. Sean hammers away to start and gives Eddie a release flapjack with Eddie still wearing the title. It’s off to a waistlock for a good long while but Sean’s spinning kick to the head misses. Eddie starts in on the knee with a dropkick followed by a second to the chest. That’s enough to set up the frog splash but Piper offers a distraction so Sean can roll away. The reverse fireman’s carry slam (now called the Prophecy) is enough to end Guerrero.

Rating: D. There’s not much you can do in a match that’s just over three minutes and a minute of that is spent in a waistlock. I’ll give them points for having Sean win as he needs something positive but there’s not much he’s going to be able to do while Piper is out there. Piper is the guy who will wind up with the attention and that’s been the case the entire time. O’Haire’s win was close enough to clean here but you need more than one win in a three minute match.

Vince and Sable are gloating about pulling off the Gowan deal, which makes me wonder what they’ve been doing in the time since we last saw them. They kiss (kind of, though it’s more Vince rubbing his lip over hers) before Vince mocks Gowan’s actions earlier. Sable starts taking her top off when Stephanie comes in to throw her out. Stephanie goes into a rant about Stephanie taking her to dinners with his business associates where he would, I kid you not, offer them sex with Stephanie….who apparently went along with it.

She’s not going to let Vince do that with Gowan though (HUH?) because Gowan is her last chance to save herself (HUH HUH?). If Vince is going to fire her then do it, even though it means he’ll lose the one person who has ever cared about her and wanted to be like him (She wanted to be a man who pimped out his underage daughter in business deals???). Stephanie finally stops the crying/screeching voice and storms off, ending one of the most bizarre segments in the history of the McMahons.

So to recap: Vince was trading sex with his underage daughter (make your own Randy Savage joke) in exchange for business deals (in theory, as the way Stephanie put it he might have just been doing it for fun. Therefore, she’s championing Zack Gowan (though not really as Gowan just showed up and is more Hogan’s project than hers) so Vince can’t do the same thing to him (though Vince is really just mocking him instead of….whatever you call what she claimed Vince did) so she can be free of him…..whatever that means. I mean, if she wanted to be free of him, why is she not WORKING SOMEWHERE ELSE?

I’ll give the McMahon storylines this: they’re rather ambitious at times. Unfortunately they make pretty much no sense but they’re certainly not run of the mill stuff. Between this and the Stephanie signing Mr. America story, it’s been a rather eventful summer and there’s no sign of it slowing down at all.

Next week: Undertaker/APA vs. FBI. Why would I want to watch a public execution?

Last week, Lesnar and Big Show broke the ring.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and drives him into the corner to start. Show gets knocked outside so they can send each other into the barricade. Some chops and right hands have Lesnar rocked a bit, followed by a clothesline for two. The slow pace continues and we hit the abdominal stretch. That goes nowhere so it’s a big boot and legdrop for two on the champ.

Show can’t get a superplex so Brock shoves him down for a top rope clothesline. A release German suplex sends Show flying (well, hovering at least) in the first interesting move of the match. The F5 doesn’t work as Show grabs the rope, drawing in Haas and Benjamin to jump Lesnar for the DQ.

Rating: D. This was every slow, dull Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar match you’ve ever seen. There’s only so much these two can do to each other with Lesnar throwing him around and Big Show hitting him hard. They’ve run out of stuff to do and the problem with that is it makes the feud seem a bit less epic than WWE would like you to believe.

Angle runs in for the save and an Angle Slam on Show. He takes too long with Haas and Benjamin though, allowing Show to get in a chokeslam. This brings out Mr. America for the house cleaning until another chokeslam plants him as well. Six man next week it would seem.

Overall Rating: D. They did a lot of stuff here as we’re getting ready for Vengeance, hopefully with less of a focus on Vince vs. Stephanie. That line about Vince sending her out to business associates made my head spin, which is becoming more and more common with their stories. The main idea here was they were trying to do stuff, which is better than not trying. Unfortunately it’s not really working, mainly because a lot of the people they’re pushing aren’t interesting or the time they need is being taken up by the Vince vs. Stephanie stuff. This show wasn’t the worst and at least they’re trying.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series 2017 Preview

This is always one of my favorite shows of the year but my goodness they’ve stacked the heck out of this one. Over the last two weeks, this show has gone from looking pretty mediocre to one of the biggest cards they’ve put together in a long time. With the champion vs. champion matches and the normal elimination matches, there’s a lot of potential here. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Enzo Amore(c) vs. Kalisto

We’ve seen this one a few times now and this seems like the final showdown between the two of them. Amore and Kalisto traded the title back and forth and now it’s time for a new challenger to come along. On paper this should be a one sided match as Kalisto is far more talented and athletic than Amore, though that’s not always as simple as it sounds.

Since he’s the only thing of value on “205 Live” at the moment, of course I’m taking Amore to win here. He’s just a bigger deal than Kalisto, who came off like a challenger of the month rather than someone who could take the title long term. Odds are someone interferes to help Amore retain and we move on to a new challenger on Tuesday. Perhaps Cedric Alexander or the debuting Hideo Itami perhaps? But yeah Amore retains.

Shield vs. New Day

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again here: this is a dream match. People don’t give it the credit that it deserves as it’s a thrown together match, but this really is one of the biggest matches WWE could put on. Both teams are among the biggest trios in WWE history (with Shield pretty firmly on top) and they’re both probably guaranteed to go to the Hall of Fame one day.

Now of course I’m taking Shield, as they’re freshly back together and need a signature win as they’re being reestablished. New Day has shown that they can take a loss here and there without really falling down the card. At the same time, Shield losing a big match is a legitimately big deal, which is why there’s no need to have New Day go over here. Shield wins, likely via a spear to Kofi Kingston.

Baron Corbin vs. The Miz

This is the first of three champion vs. champion matches with the battle of the midcard titles. These two have actually bickered a bit on Twitter, which is about all the build this match has been able to warrant. I’m not a fan of having champions facing off but it’s not like WWE can come up with anything else but this simple idea.

I’ll take Miz to win, likely due to some interference to distract Corbin. Of course that makes the Intercontinental Title seem more important than the US Title, but that’s hardly a shocking revelation. Miz is getting close and closer to the most combined days as Intercontinental Champion of all time, which would be quite the accomplishment for someone who was never supposed to amount to anything. Miz wins, even though no one should.

Charlotte vs. Alexa Bliss

We’ll continue with the champion vs. champion theme here as we look at the Women’s Champions battle. Charlotte picked up the Smackdown Women’s Title earlier this week in a big emotional moment, thanks to the return of her father Ric Flair. Bliss is no slouch though and has surprised a lot of people with several of her wins.

However, Bliss is just holding the title until Asuka can kick her head in, meaning Charlotte wins here. I can’t imagine Charlotte losing so soon after winning the title, even in a match that doesn’t mean all that much. Bliss needs the win more to help build her up for Asuka but there’s too much going against her in this case.

Raw Women’s Team vs. Smackdown Women’s Team

This comes down to the difference in talent. At the end of the day, “Monday Night Raw” is completely stacked here with captain Alicia Fox as the only weak link. Over on “Smackdown Live”, as was the case last year, it’s Becky Lynch and four warm bodies (though Naomi has improved dramatically) and that’s probably not enough to carry things.

Barring a big surprise, I can’t imagine the “Smackdown Live” women have enough to pull this off. How are you supposed to combat two of the Four Horsewomen, Asuka and Nia Jax? With Carmella? Or maybe Tamina? There’s just not enough firepower on the “Smackdown Live” side to pull this off, especially with Charlotte out of the picture.

The Bar vs. Usos

Another champion vs. champion match here and another case where the champions haven’t even held their belts for two weeks yet. This has the potential to be a heck of a fight, though I have doubts about how well WWE is going to pull it off. Somehow on a four hour show they might manage to not give it enough time, which is where a match like this should shine.

I’ll go with the Usos here, for the sole reason of “Smackdown Live” needing to pick up some wins. The Usos have the longer and better resume, though the Bar has gotten a lot more tolerable in the last year. Let them have some time and a hot finish and this will work as well as it needs to, even if there’s no reason to have two tag divisions at the moment (or ever for the most part).

Raw Men’s Team vs. Smackdown Men’s Team

Two weeks ago, this match was looking pretty boring. Now, Samoa Joe and Braun Strowman, who were fighting each other in the main event of “Summerslam 2017” a few weeks ago are (very arguably) fighting for the right to be the SEVENTH most successful wrestler in a match. This match is absolutely stacked and has one of the highest levels of talent you’ll ever see.

I’ll take “Smackdown Live” to win here though as you can have Strowman get counted out and Randy Orton score some quick falls off RKO’s to get rid of some names. Then if “Monday Night Raw” wins the overall series, Kurt Angle can crawl back to Stephanie McMahon (the real boss of the company) and keep his job. In other words, McMahon looks powerful and everyone else looks like a goon. As usual.

Brock Lesnar vs. AJ Styles

And hey, another dream match! Again, two weeks ago we were looking at Lesnar vs. Jinder Mahal and now we’re getting this beauty instead. Styles is someone who seems capable of pulling a classic out of Lesnar and, assuming it’s not Suplex City all over again, this should be a heck of a fight. Hopefully Lesnar doesn’t get lazy again, though I think Styles will be enough to avoid that problem.

I’ll still take Lesnar to win here, as he’s just a bigger deal than Styles. If nothing else we don’t want Lesnar looking weak for his match five months from now against Reigns, because that’s really what so much of this is all about. At least we can get a great match on the way there though, which is a lot more than I would have guessed coming into the previous match.

Overall Thoughts

I don’t remember the last time a Survivor Series was this stacked. Actually I don’t remember the last time almost any show was this stacked. There are a ton of huge matches on here and that could make for a heck of a night. Even if WWE screws up some of them, there’s more than enough good stuff around to make up for it. I’m coming into this with high hopes and hopefully they nail it.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6