Main Event – November 16, 2017: The Smart Choice

Main Event
Date: November 16, 2017
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Nigel McGuinness, Vic Joseph

It’s the go home show for Survivor Series and I’m not sure if that’s going to mean anything around here. The best hope I have here though is last week’s episode containing a clip from Smackdown, which you never see around here. It would make sense again this week and would help set up Survivor Series. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Heath Slater vs. Curt Hawkins

Slater pauses to start and throws Curt the I’VE GOT KIDS shirt. That’s fine with Curt, who sends him shoulder first into the post. Some stomping sets up a chinlock before a quick leg trip keeps Heath down. Back up and Slater avoids a charge into the corner, setting up Sweetness for two. Hawkins can’t hit a superplex so Slater grabs a top rope sunset flip for the pin at 4:49.

Rating: D+. Just a match that you would expect these two to have, though the switched up finish worked as a nice change of pace. Slater is a perfect choice to open something up as you’re going to get an entertaining little match and the fans are always going to cheer for him. Nothing to see of course but at least the reaction worked.

We look at Jason Jordan defeating Bray Wyatt on Raw but getting beaten up soon after.

From Raw.

Here’s Angle to announce that Jordan is off the team due to injury. Before he can name it though, Jordan comes out and begs Angle to let him do it. He’ll be fine by Sunday and he’s seen Angle fight injured so many times. Jordan says Angle picked him because he was the best option and it wasn’t favoritism. He won’t get another chance like this because he’s worked his whole life to get here and wants to represent Raw. Stephanie comes out and tells Kurt to make the decision but HHH comes out as well. HHH gets right to the chase: Jordan is out and he’s in instead. A Pedigree plants Jordan and that’s that.

From Raw again.

Kane vs. Braun Strowman

Strowman jumps Kane and I don’t think we had an opening bell. They head outside with Strowman driving him face first into the barricade but getting whipped into the steps. Kane pulls out a table as the referee isn’t even trying to tell them to get in the ring. Smart move actually. Some chair shots to the back just annoy Strowman, who takes the chair away and lights Kane up with it instead.

With the table set up at ringside, Strowman loads up a superplex, only to have Kane punch his way out to avoid a bad case of death. Kane gets knocked inside but can’t chokeslam him down. Instead it’s a middle rope ax handle and the running powerslam through the ring (that made me jump). The bell never rang so no match but that was quite the finish.

Very quick clip of Paul Heyman’s promo on Raw.

Tony Nese vs. Gran Metalik

Nese poses to start and runs Metalik over with a clothesline for an early two. Tony misses a charge though and gets caught with a dive as we take a break. Back with Nese getting caught on top, allowing Nese to get two off a gutbuster. A superkick cuts Nese off though and it’s the Metalik Driver for the pin at 6:15. Not enough shown to rate but it was exactly what you would expect.

Pay per view rundown.

Clip of AJ Styles’ promo from Tuesday.

And again, from Smackdown to close the show. New Day vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens ended when Shield came down and then everything went nuts.

Sami and Owens bail to the floor, leaving New Day to get beaten down. The Usos come in but the Bar cuts them off. We see the Raw women’s team invading the Smackdown women’s locker room for the big brawl with Charlotte taking the big beating. Back in the arena, Samoa Joe and Finn Balor run in along with others, only to have Shane lead some reinforcements. Shinsuke Nakamura starts striking away but Kurt Angle shows up to bring out Braun Strowman for the real house cleaning.

Everyone brawls to the floor where Shield surrounds Shane McMahon. Shane has to watch as Smackdown is decimated on the floor, including Samoa Joe breaking the trombone over Big E.’s back. Angle gets in the ring and asks Shane how this feels before a TripleBomb plants the boss. Angle takes off his jacket and gives Shane an Angle Slam. Strowman watches as it’s a second TripleBomb to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. The ending helps this one (again) and the HHH stuff helped a lot too. They were smart to go with the Smackdown stuff here again as that’s far more interesting than most of the stuff on Raw. I’ll be glad when the Raw vs. Smackdown stuff is done but at least it’s been entertaining while it’s lasted.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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Smackdown – June 12, 2003: It Broke

Smackdown
Date: June 12, 2003
Location: TD Waterhouse Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s a big night here as Smackdown has one of those pay per view main events on TV when Raw has the brand exclusive show. Tonight it’s Brock Lesnar defending the title against Big Show, plus Vince McMahon vs. Zack Gowan in an arm wrestling match for Gowan’s contract. Ok I didn’t say it was a high quality pay per view match. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Rey Mysterio winning the Cruiserweight Title last week. You really would have thought it would be the Mr. America stuff or Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show but this is a nice surprise.

Opening sequence.

Cruiserweight Title: Matt Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey is defending and Matt, who is too handsome to wear a mask like Rey, tells the MF’ers to stay in the back. Matt goes right at Rey to start and whips him hard into the corner. An early 619 misses and Matt hammers away some more. A middle rope neckbreaker is broken up so Rey hits a super bulldog to put both guys down instead.

Rey’s springboard seated senton gets two, only to tweak the bad groin on a leapfrog attempt. It’s fine enough for the 619 though and a springboard legdrop gets two. Back up and Matt drops him onto the middle rope, messing up the injury again. Splash Mountain gets two on the champ but he blocks the Twist of Fate. A West Coast Pop from the top without the springboard retains the title in a hurry.

Rating: B-. They kept it moving out there and that’s what this needed to be. Mysterio retaining again, despite being injured, makes it clear that he’s the better man of the two and should wrap things up between them. As a bonus, it’s a great way to open the show as they’re in and out less than ten minutes into the show with the fans having something to cheer about.

It’s time for Piper’s Pit, but an international version. Piper has a table set up with sombreros, booze and various other things, all set up for guests Eddie Guerrero and Tajiri. Eddie is very excited to be on the show and Piper seems equally happy. He talks about Eddie and Tajiri being all about lying, cheating and stealing, which Eddie says is them being honest.

Piper says the truth is Sean O’Haire will be the next World Champion, so Eddie should let him hold one of the Tag Team Titles. Eddie isn’t going to do that, but Tajiri hands his over for a plate of sushi. A fight is about to break out so let’s have some tequila instead. Tajiri spits his in Piper’s face though and they steal the belt back without much effort.

Sable is in Stephanie’s office and using her computer when Stephanie comes in. After claiming to have been looking for Zack Gowan’s contract, Sable mentions that Stephanie is bringing back the US Title (well thank goodness). Stephanie says it’s true and insults Sable a bit, saying that Sable will never be able to con her (Stephanie is too smart you see).

Billy Gunn vs. A-Train

Torrie Wilson is guest ring announcer here for no apparent reason. She introduces the returning Billy and seems to have a thing for him. Billy slugs away with some clotheslines, followed by the Stinger Splash in the corner. A bicycle kick cuts him off but the Derailer is countered, setting up a quick Fameasser to give Billy the pin.

Torrie lets Billy give him a quick spank post match.

Undertaker vs. Johnny Stamboli

Yes this is still going. Stamboli charges in and gets punched down in the corner for his efforts. The FBI distraction doesn’t work as Undertaker punches them away without too much effort, mainly because he’s the Undertaker and they’re the FBI. Stamboli finally gets in a baseball slide for a breather and Palumbo’s superkick takes Undertaker down. A slingshot legdrop and a suplex get two on Undertaker. Since he’s an athletic freak, Stamboli jumps from the mat to the top and spins around with a legdrop that only hits mat. The Last Ride gives Undertaker the pin.

Rating: D. The more I see of Stamboli, the more impressed I am. He was never going to be a big star because the basics weren’t exactly great but some of the athletic feats he pulled off were very impressive. Of course when he’s done those feats he’s lost to Rikishi and Undertaker, at least one of which wasn’t exactly necessary. This feud really needs to end soon though as it’s not doing anything for anyone involved.

The FBI chairs Undertaker down.

Mr. America helps Gowan warm up for the arm wrestling.

Here’s Stephanie to run the arm wrestling match. Naturally she has something to say but Sable comes out to cut her off. Apparently she’s Stephanie’s assistant, even though I thought they said she was Vince’s last week. Eh it’s not interesting either way so here are Gowan and Mr. America. Vince is out next and looks as jacked as he has in years.

We’re not ready to go yet though as America challenges Vince to arm wrestle him instead. Sable whispers into Vince’s ear and the boss agrees, upon two conditions. First of all, Gowan vs. Vince is still on for later. However, if Vince beats America, he leaves for the other arm wrestling. Why do I feel like I need legal representation for this? They go left handed to save Vince’s arm for later and America flips him off at the same time. Sable accuses America of cheating so they let go, causing Stephanie to threaten to disqualify her father.

Post break America is consoling Gowan when Big Show comes in to gloat a bit.

Chris Benoit/Rhyno vs. Basham Brothers

The Bashams debut Linda Miles as their manager Shaniqua. Tazz recognizes her as Miles (it’s not hard to miss) and wants to know why she has a riding crop. Rhyno runs Danny over to start but a hair pull from the apron lets Danny put on a chinlock. That’s shoved away without much effort and the hot tag brings in Benoit. Suplexes abound and Doug gets caught in the Crossface until Danny makes a save. Rhyno punches Benoit by mistake and a Rough Ryder gives Danny the pin.

Rating: D+. More angle advancement here as we move closer to Benoit and Rhyno finally splitting. The Bashams aren’t much yet and Shaniqua really doesn’t need to be there but that’s never stopped WWE before. The tag division does need some fresh talent and it’s not like they’re as dull as the FBI. At the moment the Bashams don’t have any real characters so they’re already better than the stereotype gimmicks.

Benoit and Rhyno argue in the back.

John Cena vs. Funaki

Before the match, Cena raps about Cole loves boy bands, including O-Town. Cena charges into a boot, blocks the tornado DDT and finishes with the FU (much more like the modern version) in less than a minute.

Here’s Kurt Angle for a chat. After promising to be a champion again soon, Kurt wants to talk to Team Angle. Kurt wants to know where they were last week but Team Angle says they were sick. Benjamin: “Sick of being in your shadow.” Where was Kurt when they needed him to be part of the team? Angle yells at them for not responding to a setback before telling them to think about how to get the Tag Team Titles back.

Haas says hang on a second and points out the loss at Wrestlemania where he broke his neck (not exactly). They fought Lesnar and didn’t break their necks, meaning Angle is a loser! Kurt says the YOU SUCK chants have been earned, which only he can make sound like a positive.

Haas says Kurt can still be on the team, but they’re the leaders now. That’s not cool with Kurt, who throws both of them off the team. Angle even kicks dirt on them like an umpire and they actually leave. Kurt was hilarious here but Haas’ line about not breaking their necks was the best in the whole thing. Good stuff here and funny, as Angle can always do.

During the break, Haas and Benjamin beat Angle down. Cole: “Is that how you handle things? You get fired and you beat up your boss?” Tazz: “Well yeah. I did.”

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Brock is defending and gets clotheslined down early on. Show blocks a belly to belly without too much effort but gets low bridged to the floor in a rather large crash. A whip sends Brock into the steps and a side slam gives Show two. Show’s half crab has Brock in some trouble but he makes the rope, as expected.

Lesnar shrugs it off but can’t hold him up for the F5. The chokeslam is broken up but Show runs him over and drops a leg for two. Now the chokeslam connects for another two and Show is frustrated. He loads up a super chokeslam but Lesnar reverses into a superplex….and they break the ring. They’re both pretty much dead so the match is thrown out.

Rating: D+. I’m rather sick of seeing these two fight but that was quite the visual to help move things along. It’s certainly a great crash and a unique finish but it also likely means a rematch. Lesnar sold a bunch here and Show’s stuff was fine, though once you’ve seen these two fight once, you’ve seen it every time and that’s not good for the champion and almost perennial #1 contender.

Doctors come out (with Cole getting in the of “trainers, referees, EMT’s down”, which was used on the Do Not Try This At Home announcements for years) and check on them both to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Really weak show for the most part here with only a big visual and a good opener on the positive side. They need something fresh around here and while the US Title coming back will open up some possibilities, Lesnar vs. Big Show and the Mr. America stuff just isn’t going to get them very far. Bad show here, but not a hopeless disaster.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


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Survivor Series Count-Up – 2004: In Which HHH Teases You A Lot

Survivor Series 2004
Date: November 14, 2004
Location: Gund Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 7,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

We open with a video about the seventeen years this show has run already.

Cruiserweight Title: Spike Dudley vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Billy Kidman

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Christian

Team Angle vs. Team Guerrero

Kurt Angle, Carlito Caribbean Cool, Luther Reigns, Mark Jindrak

Eddie Guerrero, John Cena, Rob Van Dam, Big Show

Maven (the first Tough Enough winner and on Team Orton tonight in the biggest match of his career) offers to demonstrate his skills to Coach but Snitsky jumps Maven and busts him open. This would be how they would keep Maven out of a PPV main event for most of the match when they realized that he was in WAY over his head.

Heidenreich vs. Undertaker

Heidenreich comes out in a straightjacket because he might attack more plants, as had been his custom in recent weeks. Undertaker does the big long entrance to get the crowd back into things. He stares at Heidenreich for a few moments before the beating begins. A charge in the corner runs into a Heidenreich elbow but the Dead Man will have none of this being on defense stuff. Undertaker works on the arm but a Heyman distraction lets Heidenreich crotch Undertaker to break up Old School. He crotches Undertaker against the post again and we head to the floor.

The chokeslam is broken up and Heidenreich gets two off a Boss Man Slam. Then like an idiot, Heidenreich punches away in the corner while Undertaker arms are down. The obvious Last Ride only gets two though as Heidenreich grabs the rope. Heidenreich tries a sleeper but Undertaker is like boy please and suplexes out of it almost immediately. The chokeslam and Tombstone finish this quick.

Bischoff says Maven is out of the main event and if he allows Orton to add a replacement, HHH will complain and Eric will lose his vacation, which is the point of the main event.

Smackdown World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Booker T

Batista and HHH are ready for the main event.

Team HHH vs. Team Orton

HHH, Edge, Batista, Gene Snitsky

Randy Orton, Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Maven

Ratings Comparison

Spike Dudley vs. Billy Kidman vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Shelton Benjamin vs. Christian

Original: B

Redo: B

Team Guerrero vs. Team Angle

Original: D

Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. Heidenreich

Original: D

Redo: D

Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Booker T

Original: F

Redo: D

Team Orton vs. Team HHH

Original: B-

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: B-

In a rare instance, I liked this a lot better the second time around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/13/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2004-eyebrows-huffman-main-events/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




Smackdown – June 5, 2003: America First, And Then Lord Littlebrook

Smackdown
Date: June 5, 2003
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

This week is almost all about Kurt Angle, who is back from the rather ridiculous two months off after having another major neck injury. To be fair, he’s long been established as a crazy man anyway so it’s not like this is out of character. As for an actual match, Rey Mysterio is challenging Matt Hardy for the Cruiserweight Title. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here are Roddy Piper and Sean O’Haire to get things going in Piper’s Pit. There’s a legend in the back named Zack Gowan, who has fought against all the odds to get here. Piper makes fun of Gowan by calling him special over and over again. Instead it’s Vince McMahon power walking to the ring. Vince has been blinded by his hatred for Mr. America and Hulk Hogan, which is why he wants to make things right. It’s time to congratulate a great American success story like Gowan. Therefore, Gowan will have the chance to earn a contract.

Cue Gowan, albeit flanked by Mr. America. Vince isn’t pleased again and accused Hogan of faking the lie detector test last week. As for Gowan, he has the chance to get his contract next week, in an arm wrestling contest against Vince. America insults Vince a bit more as this takes longer than it needs to. Vince shoves Gowan down and gloats a lot.

We get a great Kurt Angle moment in Milk-A-Mania. Eh yeah that worked.

Undertaker vs. Chuck Palumbo

Rating: D+. Palumbo got in some offense here but it wasn’t exactly a thrilling match. I’m still waiting on the FBI to go away though as they don’t have anything special for a gimmick and it’s not like there’s a star for the team. I have no idea why Undertaker is stuck with them, but at least WWE isn’t wasting any potential big stars on him.

Post match the FBI goes after Undertaker but is dispatched in short order.

Rey Mysterio’s family is in the front row for his title shot later tonight.

Quick look at Big Show laying out Brock Lesnar last week.

Show vs. Lesnar for the title next week. At least it’s not on pay per view.

We get a video tribute to Freddie Blassie, who passed away earlier in the week. This is edited off the Network version due to music issues, though an RIP graphic is there so it’s better than nothing.

Eddie Guerrero/Tajiri vs. Basham Brothers

Non-title. Tajiri takes him Doug down with some armdrags to start and Eddie chases him into the corner for the first tag. That’s fine with Eddie who rolls some suplexes but Doug breaks up the frog splash. Again, it doesn’t seem to bother Eddie who wristdrags Doug and headscissors Danny at the same time. We hear about Team Angle calling in sick tonight as Doug gets in a suplex of his own for two on Eddie.

Another suplex gets Eddie out of trouble and it’s off to Tajiri for a superkick. A DDT gives Tajiri two on Danny and we hit the Tarantula (with Tajiri crossing Danny’s legs instead of pulling back like a Boston crab). With the referee trying to break it up, Eddie adds a frog splash to Doug’s back, setting up the Buzzsaw Kick for the pin.

Rating: C+. The more I see of Eddie and Tajiri together, the more I like them. Tajiri is always smooth in the ring and that’s what makes them work so well. Eddie can do all the talking and technical stuff while Tajiri can come in and kick people really, really hard. That’s quite the combination. I’m not sure what the point is in having the Bashams come in and lose like this after a single win over the makeshift team of Rikishi and Spanky.

Another great Angle moment: singing songs with Austin while playing ukulele.

Here’s Angle, to quite the face reaction. He says it feels great to hear people tell him that he sucks so PLAY THAT MUSIC AGAIN! Angle is so overwhelmed that he lays on the mat listening to the chants. Things settle down a bit and Angle talks about wanting to be the World Champion again. As for his recovery though, there was one person who came to see him in the hospital and became a true friend. That person….will be named later as here’s Big Show to interrupt.

Show doesn’t care that Angle is back because Angle hasn’t earned his respect yet. Show gets right in Angle’s face and says if Angle wants to be champion again, he can come face Show after he wins the title next week. Angle better pray that doesn’t happen though because Angle won’t come out of the hospital again. Kurt pulls out some breaths strips and reminds Show that he took the title from him back in December. Oh and he won a gold medal with a broken freaking neck.

Angle does a quick fan poll on whether they want to see him beat Big Show up tonight, asking for a YOU SUCK. Cue Lesnar so Show bails, leaving Angle to say he could have handled that himself. Angle says Show has been getting the better of Lesnar as of late (Huh?) and thinks Brock is losing the title next week. Lesnar promises to keep the title and offers Angle a shot down the road. That sounds good to Kurt, but he’s glad Lesnar came out here. It was Brock who was visiting him in the hospital and being a friend. That means a big best friends hug and we have the latest version of the mega powers.

Ultimo Dragon is coming.

John Cena vs. Chris Benoit

Before the match, Cena rips on the cruiserweight division and thinks they don’t deserve any air time. We even get a Lord Littlebrook reference, making this even more awesome than usual. Benoit goes straight at him to start and drops Cena with a hard shoulder. Cena’s charge in the corner misses and Benoit easily takes him down into a failed Crossface attempt.

They head outside where Benoit gets posted and it’s off to a chinlock. Benoit pops back up and elbows Cena in the face before countering the FU into a DDT. The Swan Dive gets two but the ref gets bumped. That really doesn’t need to happen in a match that hasn’t run three minutes yet. Cena gets in a low blow but here’s Rhyno to take the chain away. Unfortunately he hits Benoit in the head by mistake, giving Cena the easy pin.

Rating: D+. Not enough time to do anything here but it was more about setting up the Benoit/Rhyno split anyway. That being said, it’s not like Rhyno and Benoit are guys in need of a big time split in the first place. It’s also not like the division is deep enough to be burning off teams, but why let that get in your way?

Jamie Noble/Nidia vs. Torrie Wilson/Rikishi

The guys take turns twirling their partners around before we’re ready to go. Nidia slaps Rikishi so he shoves her down, which Cole says she deserved. Torrie shows off her ability to do some not great armdrags before sending her into the corner. It’s off to Rikishi for a Stinkface attempt but Noble comes in instead.

Rikishi misses a sitdown splash but knocks Noble around without too much trouble. Nidia is brought back in to face Torrie, meaning the announcers get to talk about her outfit. Some bad clotheslines set up a high crossbody for two on Nidia but Noble trips Torrie. That earns Noble a superkick and Nidia a Stinkface as this is still all about Rikishi. Torrie finishes with a neckbreaker.

Rating: D-. Total filler here and mainly a way to look at Torrie for a few minutes. I’ve heard worse ideas but it’s getting annoying having to watch her horrible matches while acting like she’s something great. Throw in the WAY too strong support for Rikishi and it’s not my favorite time of the show.

Rey says he’s healthy and ready to take the title. Eddie comes in and gives him a pep talk.

We recap the opening segment.

Vince is in Stephanie’s office where she asks what’s up with him lately. She threatens to give Gowan a contract anyway, but Vince promises to fire her if that happens. Yet he didn’t do that for Mr. America? Why not make it one of those Iron Clad contracts then? Anyway, Vince brings in his new assistant: Sable, who has seemingly forgotten the whole Torrie angle.

Stephanie brings up Sable’s lawsuits against the company (which I don’t believe has been acknowledged before) and suggests that Vince is only looking at Sable’s body. After Stephanie’s Stating the Obvious Segment of the Week, Vince says she’s just jealous of Sable’s looks.

Cruiserweight Title: Matt Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio

Matt, who is taller than Rey Mysterio and despises traffic, is defending with Crash and Shannon Moore in his corner. We get the staredown and my goodness it’s weird to see Matt towering over someone. Matt works on a wristlock to start as we hear about various people holding the title over the years. You mean like Mysterio?

Rey gets bent around the ropes but comes right back with a slingshot dropkick through said ropes. A springboard is broken up with a forearm though and the goons get in their shots. The referee finally wakes up and we have a double ejection, which should make things a little bit better. The disgruntled Matt gets taken down by a springboard seated senton and we take a break. Back with Rey escaping Splash Mountain but getting caught by a low blow. Eh it worked for Cena so it can work for Matt.

The champ starts in on the recently injured groin (well, hamstring in this case) as Rey’s family is starting to panic. We hit a half crab for a bit until Rey dives for the ropes. He can’t run for the 619 though and gets taken into the corner to continue the beating. The Tree of Woe goes badly for Matt as his charge hits the post, followed by a spinning DDT for two on the champ. Rey heads up top but gets pulled down with a super Side Effect, which isn’t as impressive of a crash as you would have expected.

Back up and Rey grabs a Twist of Fate of his own before hobbling into a 619. They fall out to the floor though with Matt slowly remember what planet he’s on. The referee checks on Matt though, allowing Shannon and Crash to run back in for a double reverse suplex drop. The top rope legdrop gives Matt a close two. Hardy is livid and it’s a quick rollup to give Rey the pin and the title.

Rating: B. Good enough here, but it certainly didn’t feel like a cruiserweight match. Instead this came off like a regular heavyweight match which happened to have Mysterio involved. Not that Mysterio and Hardy can’t work that style, but if they can wrestle the regular style, what’s the point in having then in the cruiserweight division? Oh right: there’s no midcard title.

Rey’s family comes in to celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Better show than usual here, partially due to having the main event focused on ANYTHING other than the Mr. America nonsense. Mysterio winning the title felt like a big deal and Angle coming back was cool, though the bottom half of the card continues to feel completely unimportant. Good enough show though and miles better than anything Raw has produced in a very long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – May 29, 2003: One Lies, the Other Punches

Smackdown
Date: May 29, 2003
Location: Pensacola Civic Center, Pensacola, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We open with a recap of the Vince vs. America shenanigans setting up tonight’s lie detector test.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Sable to introduce the first match, but only after a quick shout out to….Tazz?

Torrie Wilson vs. Nidia

They’re never following up on Torrie kissing Sable are they? Before we get going, Zack Gowen is shown in the crowd. Torrie shoves Jamie Noble off the apron and chops away at Nidia to start, earning herself a knee to the ribs. Nidia grabs a suplex for two as they’ve already done more wrestling than I was expecting.

A shot to the knee has Torrie in trouble and Jamie shouts at Nidia to stay on her. The knee is slammed onto the apron and wrapped around the rope for good measure. Back in and they do the roll over the referee spot so the referee poses on the ropes. Jamie trips Torrie though, allowing Nidia to grab a rollup with tights for the pin.

Rating: D. This was their best way to open the show? I know it’s mainly for the visuals and I’d rather go with this than more of Vince vs. Hogan but they didn’t have any other options here? At least they got it out of the way I guess, but this really isn’t the best way to set the show off on a good foot.

Post match Tazz punches Jamie out and Torrie rips off Nidia’s shorts. Sable throws water at Tazz and bails to end this head scratch inducing segment.

Vince is annoyed that his limo driver has to move the limo out of a handicap zone. He orders said driver to stay right there because this shouldn’t take long.

Stephanie McMahon tests out the lie detector.

Team Angle wants to regain their titles in preparation for Kurt Angle’s return next week.

Eddie Guerrero has Tajiri in Guerrero gear and thinks he can feel some Latino Heat. Tajiri has even stolen his first car! He can even speak English too (which may be a first).

Tag Team Titles: Eddie Guerrero/Tajiri vs. Team Angle

Eddie and Tajiri are defending. Tajiri gets sent outside early on and it’s a double beating until Eddie elbows his way to freedom. A pop up dropkick puts Shelton down and it’s off to Tajiri for those hard kicks. Again: it’s a very simple style of action but he does it well enough to make it work.

Tajiri grabs a sunset flip and rolls Shelton around the ring to really dizzy him up. A double kick to the head gives us a double knockdown though and we take a break. Back with Shelton kicking the knee out (two matches in a row with knee work) to take over. Charlie comes in for a modified Indian Deathlock before it’s back to Shelton for a leglock of his own.

Eddie finally breaks up a half crab but the distraction just lets Shelton come back in sans tag. A headscissors finally gets Tajiri out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Eddie for a monkey flip. House is cleaned in a hurry and it’s time to roll some suplexes. The frog splash crushes Charlie with Shelton making the save. A double DDT takes Team Angle down and it’s the not as hot tag to Tajiri for kicks using the good leg.

Charlie reverses a tornado DDT into a northern lights suplex for two with Eddie making another save. Tajiri superkicks Charlie down and Eddie dives off the top onto Shelton. The Haas of Pain has Tajiri in trouble and the bell rings….because Eddie rang it himself. As the referee yells at the timekeeper, Eddie misses a belt shot. Charlie grabs the belt so Eddie drops to the mat, drawing a phantom DQ to retain the titles.

Rating: B+. I was digging the heck out of this one and the screwy finish was the best way they could have gone as it gives them a reason for another match. Tajiri is an upgrade over Chavo and plays a great partner to Eddie. The tease of a submission at the end worked very well and Eddie was feeling it here, which makes for a nearly instant classic.

Zack Gowen talks about wanting to live his dream but being here as a fan to watch the lie detector test.

The lie detector is set up in the middle of the ring and here’s Vince. McMahon recaps the whole double contract situation and mocks Gowen, who will never be allowed to wrestle here if America fails the lie detector. Here’s America with Vince ordering that he be strapped into the chair. It’s a simple system: ding means true, buzz means no.

We get straight to the questions: he’s Mr. America, he’s in a wrestling ring in Pensacola, Florida and he’s employed by Smackdown. Vince demands the question but America would like a drink of water before answering if he’s Hulk Hogan or not. He says no and that comes up true as well. They ask him again and it’s still not what Vince wants to hear. Vince: “It’s Hogan, Hogan, Hogan, Hogan, Hogan!” America: “NO NO NO NO NO!” Machine: “DING DING DING DING DING!”

That means he officially passes the test and Vince freaks out. He agrees to take his own test but America is getting to ask the questions. Vince is apparently a horrible pervert, a disrespected businessman who doesn’t do things for any fans all over the world, enjoys himself with Torrie Wilson’s Playboy (including in the limo on the way to the arena) and fantasizes about Mae Young. Vince is unhooked and America punches him out. See, now this is the kind of goofy, over the top comedy bit that the story should have been about. It’s not great but I’ve seen far less entertaining bits. More of this, less of America having matches.

Post break, Vince blames Stephanie for the whole thing. Things will change next week.

Chris Benoit vs. Sean O’Haire

Sean walks way in front of Roddy Piper, looking like he wants nothing to do with his mentor. Some early shots to the ribs have Benoit down in the corner but he grabs a dragon screw legwhip for a breather. That’s fine with Sean who takes Benoit down again into a chinlock. Back up and a DDT gives Benoit a breather, followed by a German suplex for two. Piper grabs the leg and actually gets caught in the Crossface. Sean makes a save and grabs a rollup with tights for the pin.

Rating: D. That’s a nice win for O’Haire but he desperately needs to get away from Piper. The pairing isn’t all that interesting in the first place and now Piper isn’t adding anything in the slightest. At least he got a big win here though and wasn’t squashed until the ending, which is somehow an improvement.

We look back at Rey Mysterio defeating Crash and Shannon Moore to earn a Cruiserweight Title shot, which will take place next week.

An injured Rey says he’ll be Cruiserweight Champion next week. He’s all fired up but here’s Matt Hardy to jump him from behind with a low blow.

Kurt Angle is back next week.

Ultimo Dragon is coming.

Rikishi/Spanky vs. Basham Brothers

This would be Doug and Danny’s debut and I still have no idea which is which. Doug and Rikishi start things off with Bashman being sent over the top in short order. Rikishi keeps cleaning house and it’s off to Spanky for a running forearm in the corner. Thankfully the Bashams finally take over and start hammering away with their pretty generic style of offense. An enziguri allows the hot tag to Rikishi, who cleans house with superkicks. The Bashams take a double Stinkface and it’s back to Spanky. A charge into the corner is countered though and Doug rolls him up with Danny adding extra leverage for the pin.

Rating: F. This was more about pushing Rikishi than anything else. He cleaned house multiple times and hit his embarrassing signature move on the newcomers. The Bashams look like a pair of clowns who won on a fluke while Rikishi looks like a world beater. Terrible debut and the team is in trouble from the start.

Vince’s limo is towed and Gowen shows up to gloat. Who knew that regular fans had access to Vince’s limo?

Undertaker/Brock Lesnar vs. FBI

This is your main event people. Hang on a second though as this is a handicap match but Nunzio is in street clothes. He’s injured after last week so we have a replacement Italian.

Undertaker/Brock Lesnar vs. Chuck Palumbo/Johnny Stamboli/Big Show

Undertaker slugs Show down to start but it’s Palumbo stomping at Undertaker in the corner. That just earns him Old School so it can be off to Lesnar for the house cleaning. Brock shrugs off some double teaming and hands it back to Undertaker to work on Stamboli. The running DDT plants Stamboli again so it’s off to Show for the real showdown.

Brock comes in instead and takes a heck of a clothesline to the chest. It’s too early for a chokeslam but Brock has to beat up the Italians. The chokeslam gets two on Lesnar and it’s the Italians double teaming on the floor. Back in and the beating continues as Lesnar is selling too much for the FBI.

A clothesline takes Palumbo down and it’s a hot tag off to undertaker to dominate. Snake Eyes and the big boot drop Palumbo and there’s the dragon sleeper on Show. Nunzio’s save with a chair only annoys Undertaker so there’s a chokeslam. Palumbo breaks it up so it’s back to back for the Italians, only to have the chokeslam end Lesnar.

Rating: D+. So yeah, we’re actually heading towards Lesnar vs. Show again, just in case we didn’t get the point last time. They really need to elevate someone already as this isn’t getting anyone anywhere. Where does this leave Undertaker? Facing the Italians? That’s the best they’ve got? The match was fun while it lasted at least, but Show vs. Lesnar again does nothing for me.

Overall Rating: C+. The tag match more than carries this one and the lie detector segment was a lot better than I was expecting. Smackdown is in a better place than Raw at the moment as they have some pieces to put together but they don’t know the order yet. I’ll take that over thinking Kevin Nash is their best option any day.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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Main Event – October 26, 2017: Dash Wilder Will Be Relieved

Main Event
Date: October 26, 2017
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

It’s not a good sign when I can barely remember this week’s Monday Night Raw on Friday night. The big stories were the Smackdown invasion and Brock Lesnar returning to answer Jinder Mahal’s challenge. It’s hard to guess what we might get for original content though as there could be almost any combination of the undercard. Let’s get to it.

We actually change things up a bit by looking at a recap of Sunday’s main event. That’s certainly a new one.

Opening sequence.

Matt Hardy vs. Curt Hawkins

Hawkins takes him into the corner to start but is quickly armdragged down into a headscissors. That’s reversed into a chinlock though as they’re certainly moving here. Curt’s Russian legsweep gets two but Matt comes right back and sends him into the buckle over and over. The middle rope elbow to the back looks to set up the Side Effect but Curt grabs a Michinoku Driver for two. Not that it matters as Matt grabs the Twist of Fate for the pin at 5:09.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but above all else it’s nice to have ANYTHING other than Dash Wilder losing over and over. Hopefully that means the return of the Revival in the near future. Anyway, there’s not much else you can say about Matt Hardy beating Curt Hawkins to give Curt his 120th loss in a row. Pretty much what you would expect.

From Raw for the first time.

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar to respond to Jinder Mahal. Paul finds it interesting that someone has an issue finding Lesnar as the undisputed champion of WWE. There is someone who thinks that they can match up to Brock and that makes little sense to Heyman. We live in an age of trash talk but Heyman didn’t talk trash about Goldberg, Samoa Joe or Braun Strowman. Instead he praised all of them because they deserved it. Then there’s the joke of a champion like Jinder Mahal.

When we think of a champion, we think of Bruno Sammartino, Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels, John Cena and BROCK LESNAR. This isn’t about Lesnar wanting to wave the Raw flag. This is about Smackdown thinking that it wasn’t treated fairly in the Superstar Shakeup. Whichever show has Brock Lesnar is the undisputed top show and at Survivor Series, Jinder is going to Suplex City. The challenge is accepted and Brock looks angry.

And again.

Finn Balor vs. Kane

Balor gets chased to the floor to start and comes back in where Kane hammers him down in the corner. A big boot cuts off a comeback attempt but Balor slugs him out to the floor anyway. Back in and the running corner clothesline sets up the side slam for two as this has been mostly Kane. A backbreaker keeps Finn in trouble and it’s another trip to the floor for more punishment. They head back inside where Balor hits a quick Sling Blade, followed by the shotgun dropkick. Balor loads up the Coup de Grace but Kane chokeslams him off the top. Two more chokeslams give Kane the clean pin at 8:50.

Rating: D-. Stupid, dumb, idiotic, short sighted, moronic, FREAKING RIDICULOUS and any other adjectives you care to name here. The idea is to build Kane up for a match with Strowman and there’s nothing wrong with that. What there IS something wrong with is using Balor to help build that up when he’s FINN FREAKING BALOR. You have him go over Styles on Sunday and lose to Kane clean on Monday? This is one of the dumbest decisions I’ve seen in a long time and that’s not a good sign going into one of biggest shows of the year.

Apollo Crews/Titus O’Neil vs. Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson

Gallows punches Titus into the corner to start but Titus chops the heck out of both of them. Apollo comes in for some kicks and the ring is cleared as we take a break. Back with Gallows kicking Titus in the face. The Magic Killer is good for the pin on Titus at 6:20. Well over half of that was in the break and it felt like something was clipped when we came back.

In the likely reason for the short second match, here’s the last thing from Raw.

Here’s Angle to announce the Raw men’s team but Shane comes out of the crowd, flanked by almost the entire Smackdown roster. Shane says Raw is under siege and Angle bails to the ramp. The Smackdown roster is told to go get them so they march to the back. First up is Titus Worldwide, who are beaten down in short order. The Raw women run away and it’s time to beat up some jobbers.

They head into the locker room to beat on Jason Jordan and Matt Hardy before heading into another room. More people are beaten up in another room and now it’s the women fighting each other. Rollins and Ambrose come in with chairs but are beaten down without too much effort. Baron Corbin and Rusev capture Angle and make him watch the beating before taking him back into the arena where Shane is waiting. Shane says they’ll finish this at Survivor Series. I liked this a lot more than I thought I would as they made it feel like an invasion for a change and it could go somewhere for a change.

Overall Rating: C-. This one all comes down to how you liked the ending as the wrestling here was nothing to see. The second match didn’t even need to be on the show and felt like filler instead of anything of value. The show wasn’t terrible and summed up everything you needed to know from Raw but that’s all there is to say here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw – October 23, 2017: Steven Seagal Couldn’t Have Done It Better

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 23, 2017
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T., Corey Graves

It’s the night after Tables Ladders and Chairs and the big question now is how many wrestlers are still under the weather. At the moment, Bo Dallas, Roman Reigns and Bray Wyatt are all missing in action and there’s no word on when they’ll be back. It should be interesting to see how things shake out as we head towards Survivor Series. Let’s get to it.

First off, Happy Birthday wife.

We open with a long recap of last night’s main event, with the garbage truck stuff being left out. I’ve heard people say that it was one of the worst matches ever but it’s not even the worst WWE pay per view main event this year.

Here’s Kurt Angle to open the show and you know what chants he’s going to get. Now it’s time to talk about Survivor Series though, with various matches already being set. It’s going to be champion vs. champion with:

Alexa Bliss vs. Natalya

Miz vs. Baron Corbin

Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins vs. Usos

Brock Lesnar vs. Jinder Mahal

In addition to these matches, there will be a men’s and a women’s elimination match with participants to be named later. Cue the Miz and the Bar to cut Angle off with Miz saying that Angle has overstepped his boundaries. Last night was too far and tonight, it’s time to pay. Angle goes to leave but everyone surrounds the ring. Cue Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose for the save and everyone bails. Angle isn’t done though and makes a match right now, including a guest star who stuck around after last night.

Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose/AJ Styles vs. The Miz/The Bar

Rollins stomps Sheamus down in the corner to start and it’s Dean dropping some elbows for two. Ambrose comes in and gets slammed by Cesaro, only to have Seth hit a running kick to the chest to take over. It’s off to AJ with a ROAR and some forearms have Cesaro in trouble. The villains are sent to the floor for a triple dive and we take a break.

Back with Ambrose in an armbar from Sheamus before it’s off to Cesaro for a chinlock. Dean reverses a suplex into one of his own and the hot tag brings in Seth. A Falcon Arrow takes Cesro down but Miz grabs a heck of a DDT for two on Rollins. Back from a second break with Miz firing off the YES Kicks to Seth’s chest.

The big one is countered into a rollup and Miz bails to the floor where Ambrose knocks him over the barricade. Back in and it’s the hot tag to AJ as everything breaks down. Rollins breaks up a rollup for two and it’s the stereo dives to Miz and Sheamus. The Phenomenal Forearm ends Cesaro at 19:56.

Rating: B. Nice long match here and having AJ around is a good idea. The fans love him and are going to cheer anything he does, which makes him as smart of an attraction as you can have. Of course that’s not going to be enough to put him over the likes of Jinder Mahal but why do that when you can have Jinder keep the title another five and a half months?

Post match Kane comes out and helps destroy the winners. Back from a break with Kane in the ring and another highlight package from last night’s main event. Kane says he’s heard stories about Braun Strowman destroying Roman Reigns and surviving attacks in an ambulance. He liked what he heard but needed to see it for himself. When he saw it in person though, all he saw was trash. That’s why he put Strowman in the back of a garbage truck and liked hearing the gears grinding away. Kane will always be Raw’s resident monster and now he wants competition. That means an open challenge and we have an answer.

Finn Balor vs. Kane

Balor gets chased to the floor to start and comes back in where Kane hammers him down in the corner. A big boot cuts off a comeback attempt but Balor slugs him out to the floor anyway. Back in and the running corner clothesline sets up the side slam for two as this has been mostly Kane. A backbreaker keeps Finn in trouble and it’s another trip to the floor for more punishment. They head back inside where Balor hits a quick Sling Blade, followed by the shotgun dropkick. Balor loads up the Coup de Grace but Kane chokeslams him off the top. Two more chokeslams give Kane the clean pin at 8:50.

Rating: D-. Stupid, dumb, idiotic, short sighted, moronic, FREAKING RIDICULOUS and any other adjectives you care to name here. The idea is to build Kane up for a match with Strowman and there’s nothing wrong with that. What there IS something wrong with is using Balor to help build that up when he’s FINN FREAKING BALOR. You have him go over Styles on Sunday and lose to Kane clean on Monday? This is one of the dumbest decisions I’ve seen in a long time and that’s not a good sign going into one of biggest shows of the year.

Angle is in his office when Shane McMahon comes in for some friendly banter about the battle of the brands at Survivor Series. Things are smoothed over without too many issues though.

Asuka vs. Emma

Rematch from last night. An early cross armbreaker has Emma in trouble (just like last night) and the hip attack sends her out to the floor. Emma sends her shoulder first into the post but has to fight out of the Asuka Lock. Asuka gets in a missile dropkick, followed by some strikes to the head. Another hip attack gets two as the fans are trying to stay into this one. Back up and Emma tries a rollup, only to be reversed into the Asuka Lock for the tap at 5:13.

Rating: D+. Well it was shorter than last night but it’s basically the same match: Emma beats her down for most of the match but gets hip attacked and taps out for the finish. This makes Emma look like an overachiever and Asuka more like a person already melting under the spotlight. What a great way to bring her up people. Not with a squash or anything like that, but rather going move for move (and often worse) with one of the lowest rated women in the division. Nicely done WWE and a great way to mess up what should have been easy.

Here’s Alexa Bliss and she’s not in a good mood. She dispatched the leader of the old folks home last night in the performance of her career but it didn’t get the reaction she deserved. Then Finn Balor and AJ Styles stood in the ring and stared at each other for ten minutes so the fans thought it was awesome. Therefore, she’s going to say a chant and the sheep here are going to repeat it back to her. The chant is YOU DESERVE IT but here’s Mickie James to cut her off instead. A MickieDT onto the title leaves Bliss laying and Mickie says that Bliss does deserve it.

Bayley and Sasha Banks are in Kurt’s office where he says that they should be the captain of the women’s Survivor Series team. Alicia Fox comes in and wants to play Rock Paper Scissors for the captain spot. Angle thinks a triple threat might be better.

Here’s Elias to complain about what happened last night. After an insult to Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers, it’s time for a live musical performance. Elias starts insulting the crowd but the microphone keeps cutting out. He threatens to go beat up the sound technician but here’s Jason Jordan to cut him off.

Jason Jordan vs. Elias

Rematch from last night and we’re joined in progress with Jordan taking a big elbow drop for two. A double kick to the chest sets up a chinlock to keep Jordan in trouble. The first suplex drops Elias though and Jordan takes him outside for three straight drives into the corner. Not that it matters as Elias comes back with a guitar shot for the DQ at 3:20.

Rating: D+. So that happened and is likely happening again in the near future. Jordan vs. Elias isn’t all that interesting but at least they have something for Jordan to do. He’s not floundering in the role so far and a big win over Elias should help him, though the Angle son thing is still doing nothing for him.

Jordan leaves with a heck of a welt on his arm.

Here are Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar to respond to Jinder Mahal. Paul finds it interesting that someone has an issue finding Lesnar as the undisputed champion of WWE. There is someone who thinks that they can match up to Brock and that makes little sense to Heyman. We live in an age of trash talk but Heyman didn’t talk trash about Goldberg, Samoa Joe or Braun Strowman. Instead he praised all of them because they deserved it. Then there’s the joke of a champion like Jinder Mahal.

When we think of a champion, we think of Bruno Sammartino, Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels, John Cena and BROCK LESNAR. This isn’t about Lesnar wanting to wave the Raw flag. This is about Smackdown thinking that it wasn’t treated fairly in the Superstar Shakeup. Whichever show has Brock Lesnar is the undisputed top show and at Survivor Series, Jinder is going to Suplex City. The challenge is accepted and Brock looks angry.

Kalisto is invoking his rematch clause tomorrow night on 205 Live. Tonight though is about family. Cedric Alexander, Rich Swann, Mustafa Ali and Gran Metalik come in and we hit the LUCHA dance.

Bayley vs. Sasha Banks vs. Alicia Fox

The winner is the captain at Survivor Series. Everyone goes at it to start with Fox hitting the northern lights suplex for two on Bayley, followed by the same thing to Sasha. A double dropkick puts Fox on the floor and it’s time for the staredown. Fox gets knocked of the apron and a double dropkick does it again.

Back from a break with Fox holding Banks in a chinlock. That goes nowhere so Fox takes her to the top for a superplex, only to get pulled down into the Tower of Doom with Bayley getting the least of it. A big boot gives Fox two on Bayley so Fox shouts that she doesn’t want to play. She heads outside and rings the bell, only to walk into the Bayley to Belly for two. Bayley fights Banks off and walks into a Bayley to Belly from Fox, only to get caught in the Bank Statement. That’s broken up as well so Fox throws them into each other and pins Bayley at 11:18.

Rating: D+. Fox winning is more interesting and it’s not like these two aren’t going to be on the team anyway. It wouldn’t have hurt them to let Banks take the fall for a change though as neither of them are exactly lighting the world on fire at the moment. This division has become such a mess and it’s not showing any signs of improving anytime soon.

Lucha Lucha vs. The Zo Train

Kalisto, Rich Swann, Cedric Alexander, Mustafa Ali, Gran Metalik

Enzo Amore, Tony Nese, Drew Gulak, Noam Dar, Ariya Daivari

One fall to a finish. So it turns out that Enzo can’t talk so Gulak ready his prepared statement, albeit with better grammar. The villains spell out S-A-W-F-T with Enzo nearly coughing the T. Kalisto wants to start with Enzo but has to kick Daivari in the face instead. Metalik comes in and flips away from Nese before doing his rope walk into a dropkick. The lucha guys clear the ring and a quadruple superkick puts Gulak on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Dar working on Swann’s arm until it’s off to Daivari. A double crossbody puts both of them down and everyone else starts brawling on the floor. Daivari gets kicked into the corner and tags Enzo, who gets kicked down by Enzo. The DDG gets two on Kalisto as Swann makes the save. Double dives take down some villains, followed by stereo moonsaults to the floor. Kalisto grabs the Salida Del Sol to end Enzo at 9:05.

Rating: C. The dives were fun but this match really isn’t doing anything to help the fact that most of these people aren’t interesting in the slightest. So many of them feel like they’re just a person who happens to be in the match, which doesn’t exactly make me want to watch most of them. Kalisto vs. Enzo isn’t an exciting match but it’s what we’re stuck with for now. Hopefully it wraps up tomorrow night.

Here’s Angle to announce the Raw men’s team but Shane comes out of the crowd, flanked by almost the entire Smackdown roster. Shane says Raw is under siege and Angle bails to the ramp. The Smackdown roster is told to go get them so they march to the back. First up is Titus Worldwide, who are beaten down in short order. The Raw women run away and it’s time to beat up some jobbers.

They head into the locker room to beat on Jason Jordan and Matt Hardy before heading into another room. More people are beaten up in another room and now it’s the women fighting each other. Rollins and Ambrose come in with chairs but are beaten down without too much effort. Baron Corbin and Rusev capture Angle and make him watch the beating before taking him back into the arena where Shane is waiting. Shane says they’ll finish this at Survivor Series. I liked this a lot more than I thought I would as they made it feel like an invasion for a change and it could go somewhere for a change.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling and the booking left something to be desired but the storytelling was good. Survivor Series is being built up in a hurry and I want to see where some of the stories go. The Raw vs. Smackdown stuff has potential but they have a few weeks left to maintain that momentum. Having some big names missing didn’t help things but there’s more than enough time to bring them back in. Not a bad show this week, though much more of a stepping stone than anything else.

Results

AJ Styles/Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins b. The Miz/The Bar – Phenomenal Forearm to Cesaro

Kane b. Finn Balor – Chokeslam

Asuka b. Emma – Asuka Lock

Jason Jordan b. Elias via DQ when Elias used a guitar

Alicia Fox b. Bayley and Sasha Banks – Whip into Fox

Lucha Lucha b. The Zo Train – Salida Del Sol to Amore

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Smackdown – May 22, 2003: Prelude to a Test

Smackdown
Date: May 22, 2003
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We open with a recap of Mr. America vs. Roddy Piper on Sunday with America and Zach Gowen getting one up on Vince McMahon.

Vince is in the back and marches to the arena. He sounds livid as he talks about being sick of all these mistakes going on around here. It all started when Mr. America got an iron clad contract and has snowballed from there. While he’s failed to prove that America is Hulk Hogan, tonight Vince is taking over and you’ll see his fingerprints all over the show (his words).

Opening sequence, now in black and white and a slower paced theme. Rather catchy one indeed.

Tag Team Titles: Eddie Guerrero/Tajiri vs. Team Angle

Team Angle is challenging in their rematch from Sunday. Tajiri and Benjamin start things off with Shelton taking him down in short order. Back up with Tajiri sliding his way out and dropping a knee on the now legal Haas. Eddie comes in to break up a double suplex and a double backbreaker puts Team Angle on the floor. It’s off to Eddie to clean house, including a middle rope spinning armdrag that he can make look perfectly smooth.

Tajiri comes in and kicks at Charlie’s back but Charlie hits something like a spear. Not that it matters as it’s back to Eddie almost immediately. That means a bunch of suplexes as everything breaks down, including Tajiri diving onto Team Angle as we take a break. Back with a sunset flip/neckbreaker combination getting two on Eddie, followed by a cravate to keep things slow.

That goes nowhere so they head up top where Eddie breaks up a superplex attempt but the frog splash hits knees. We hit the abdominal stretch on Eddie until Charlie’s takedown (kind of like a spinebuster) gets two. Shelton jumps over Charlie onto Eddie’s back for two but he fights up with a wristdrag/headscissors combination to put both of them down.

The hot tag brings in Tajiri to clean house and a tornado DDT gets two on Shelton. The dragon whip drops Tajiri but Eddie hits the referee with a chair, only to throw said chair to Haas. That’s enough for a DQ from the somehow conscious referee and the titles are retained.

Rating: B. Really good match here with the ending being the right call. Having Eddie cheat to retain the titles makes the most sense, especially since it’s hard to imagine them losing the belts this early. Tajiri is a fine replacement partner and they have the chance to set up someone else as big time challengers.

We look back at Zach Gowen debuting last week.

Vince runs into Stephanie and promises that things are getting out of control.

Here’s Vince for another chat as I’m noticing a theme here. The boss is disappointed in the lack of America unmasking on Sunday and that means he wants an apology from Roddy Piper. Cue Piper and Sean O’Haire with Roddy actually apologizing in short order. Vince slaps him in the face and the coat comes off, only to have Sean cut things off. He’ll take the blame for Sunday but tonight, he wants Mr. America. Piper LOVES the idea and Vince makes the match, but with a stipulation. If O’Haire loses, Piper is fired.

Kurt Angle is back in two weeks.

John Cena vs. Spanky

Before the match, Cena doesn’t think much of Spanky ripping off his gimmick. Spanky charges at him and hits a one footed dropkick Cena slams him down though and grabs a snap suplex for two. A hard throw sends Spanky into the corner for two more and Cena scores with a delayed vertical suplex. Spanky scores with an enziguri for two but it’s the shoulder block and an FU to give Cena the pin.

Rating: C-. Spanky was energetic as usual and that’s what matters more than anything else in his case. When you have someone who is willing to do pretty much anything you ask him, it’s quite the valuable asset. Spanky has gone from annoying to a fun character where I want to see what he does every week. Cena winning was the right call though as he’s going to be a bigger deal in the short and long term.

Stills of Sunday’s stretcher match.

The FBI is ready to face Brock Lesnar later tonight.

Chris Benoit vs. Matt Hardy

Opening sequence. Rey Mysterio is on commentary while Matt, who likes his steak medium well and has more teeth than Chris Benoit, makes his entrance. Matt slaps Benoit’s hand away and we have a very loud screeching reaction. Benoit knocks him into the corner though and it’s time to crank on the arm. With Chris in control, that little MF’er offers a distraction though and Matt a Side Effect for two.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before a suplex gets two on Benoit. A neckbreaker gets two more for Matt and we hit the front facelock. That goes nowhere so the non-yodeling legdrop gives Matt another near fall. Back up and a double collision puts both guys down for a bit. Benoit grabs a snap suplex for two and a catapult sends Matt into the post. There’s the Swan Dive and Rey takes care of Shannon, allowing the Crossface to give Chris the clean win.

Rating: B-. Matt loses again but at least it was in a good match. Working the neck made perfect sense and was a fine story to build things around, though Benoit needs something to do. Matt vs. Rey seems to be set in stone for the near future but Benoit is just kind of there at the moment, which isn’t the best use of him.

Post match Matt says Rey can have a title shot if he beats Shannon and Crash right now.

Rey Mysterio vs. Shannon Moore/Crash

Joined in progress with Rey sending Shannon outside and headscissoring Crash down as well. Shannon breaks up the 619 and Crash backdrops him out to the floor. Something like a double flapjack gets two on Rey but he comes right back with a double DDT. Shannon is sent outside and a top rope seated senton takes Crash down. Back up and Rey seems to be favoring his groin and is having trouble running the ropes. The 619 sets up a middle rope West Coast Pop to get rid of Shannon, despite his foot being on the ropes. Since this is apparently under elimination rules, a quick hurricanrana pins Crash as well.

Rating: D+. There’s a chance that the injury slowed things down here but all that matters is Rey being able to face Matt and win the title in the near future. This hardly felt like a challenge for Mysterio anyway as he absorbed the duo’s offense and winning the match without breaking much of a sweat.

Post match Matt beats up both guys as Rey is carried out.

Stephanie has a sitdown interview with Zach Gowen, who receives an apology for what happened last week. Gowen had cancer when he was a kid and the leg was amputated to prevent it from stretching. He grew up with his mom as his father bailed when Gowen was four. Make-A-Wish came to him when he was in the hospital and he would have wanted to meet Hulk Hogan but he (Gowen) declined because he was going to live. Next up though: he wants to be a professional wrestler. He’s been training as of late and hopes to wrestle here on Smackdown. Stephanie says anything can happen.

Vince is seething.

Post break, Vince comes up to Mr. America and says if he loses tonight, he has to undergo a lie detector test next week. America says no but Vince calls him a coward, which makes America change his mind. Vince goes into a RANT, shouting about how America will be proven to be a liar next week. That’s more intense than he usually gets and it worked quite well.

Brock Lesnar vs. Johnny Stamboli

The entire FBI jumps Johnny to start until it’s one on one for the opening bell. Brock drives him hard into the corner and scores with a fall away slam. The rest of the team gets in a little offense on the floor though and Stamboli stomps away for two. Brock misses a charge into the corner and Stamboli grabs a cross armbreaker to keep things slow. Lesnar fights up with a powerbomb and gets all fired up, drawing in the rest of the FBI for the DQ.

Rating: D. This was short and there wasn’t enough time for it to go anywhere. Well that and the match being Brock vs. Stamboli. You can’t get anywhere with someone like that challenging a monster like Lesnar and for the life of me, I have no idea why the FBI is getting protected like this. Haven’t they run their course yet?

The beatdown is on post match until the Undertaker makes his return for the save.

Here’s Sable for a chat about being in Raw Magazine and then about….Tazz? She’s not cool with Tazz picking Torrie Wilson as the winner of the bikini contest and gets on the desk to look down at him. After gyrating a bit, Sable pours water over his head and Tazz is REALLY not cool with that one.

Vince tells O’Haire to take his time tonight and explains the lie detector concept.

Mr. America vs. Sean O’Haire

America has Gowen with him and O’Haire has Piper. O’Haire shoves him down to start and does it again to prove his point. Back up and America does the same, meaning it’s time for some posing. American’s offense is cut off by Piper grabbing his boot and a slam gets two. Some kicks to the chest set up a chinlock on America and we’re stuck there for a good while.

America fights up and no sells a spinning kick to the face, meaning it’s America Up time. Piper gets knocked off the apron and the legdrop connects but Piper grabs America’s leg again. Cue Vince with a bunch of cops to arrest Gowen for his actions on Sunday (egads) so America goes outside to help his buddy. That’s enough for a countout though as O’Haire wins to end the show.

Rating: D-. If this is the best they can do to elevate O’Haire, they’re in more trouble than I thought they were. Almost half of the match was spent on the Vince angle and the other stuff wasn’t all that good in the first place. Vince didn’t need to be back again but when he’s the focus of the show, he’s REALLY the focus of the show. Terrible main event here, as you kind of had to expect.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling helps a lot here but there’s not much of a way around the Mr. America stuff dominating the show. Lesnar vs. the FBI and Sable vs. Torrie aren’t any better but at least we had some good matches to carry things. This was far better than anything at the pay per view and that’s a nice breath of air for the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: My Version of Thinking Lesnar vs. Mahal is Dumb

You know, because it is.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-version-thinking-lesnar-vs-mahal-dumb/




Judgment Day 2003 (2017 Redo): Judge Not Lest Ye Have To Watch This Show

Judgment Day 2003
Date: May 18, 2003
Location: Charlotte Coliseum, Charlotte, North Carolina
Attendance: 13,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Let’s get this over with. I don’t remember a time when the TV leading up to a pay per view has been this miserable and the mere idea of this show is making me cringe. Sometimes a show can throw in a surprise or two but I can’t think of a single match that actually gives me hope on this one. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a shot of gallows with kids reciting a rhyme about evil (it’s the same one from the Biker Taker vignettes). Basically everything leads us here and it ends tonight.

Here’s Steve Austin to open things up with an interview instead of a match. I’m so thrilled already. He’s not out here to run his mouth and waste your time because there’s a bunch of great matches tonight. Are we looking at the same card? Austin is going to watch in the crowd with the fans….in a sky box, with a bunch of beer. Lawler seems to think a sky box means sitting in the cheap seats as Austin gives Tazz a beer and heads into the crowd.

John Cena/FBI vs. Spanky/Chris Benoit/Rhyno

Cena says that being he’s with the FBI giving out black eyes, he’ll have the people cheering the bad guys. It’s Palumbo/Stamboli with Cena here as this is a bonus match. Spanky dives onto everyone but gets decked by Cena as we start fast. Cole says he knows all about rapping because he’s a shoelace. The FBI plants Spanky with a double slam and cranks on his legs for good measure.

Palumbo slaps on a bearhug as Tazz and Cole discuss beer. A hard clothesline cuts Spanky off but he headscissors Palumbo into Stamboli. That’s enough for the hot tag to Benoit, meaning it’s time for the German suplexes. Nunzio comes in and eats a Gore but he’s still able to break up Sliced Bread #2. The distraction is enough for Stamboli and Palumbo to hit the Kiss of Death (Demolition Decapitator with a legdrop instead of an elbow) for the pin.

Rating: D. The match was energetic while it lasted but that’s the problem: it wasn’t even four minutes long. Why in the world did we need a pay per view opener that lasts as long as a TV match? The people involved in this match deserve a little more than this, though at least they were on the pay per view card.

Austin is in the sky box having a woman make him a hot dog when Eric Bischoff comes in. Everything they have is split between them so Austin gives him the hot dog. Bischoff is annoyed that there’s no scotch so he’ll have a beer. In a glass that is, which Austin doesn’t appreciate.

We recap La Resistance vs. Test/Scott Steiner, which is all about the Iraq War and how horrible you are if you don’t completely support it.

Test/Scott Steiner vs. La Resistance

Test and Rene Dupree slug it out to start until a backdrop puts Rene down. It’s off to Steiner for some more aggressive offense, including a push-up elbow. Dupree sends him outside though and Sylvan Grenier drives him back first into the apron. The announcers debate France vs. America as Grenier’s chinlock doesn’t get him very far. A middle rope clothesline gives Grenier two but Steiner suplexes his way to AMERICAN freedom.

The hot tag brings in Test to clean house to silence. Test steals the beret and gets rolled up for two as everything breaks down. The pumphandle slam plants Rene but Stacy Keibler gets on the apron for no logical reason. Dupree dropkicks Test into Stacy, who lands in Steiner’s arms. After putting Stacy down, Steiner tags himself in for the reverse DDT on Dupree for no cover. Test boots Steiner by mistake and gets sent outside, leaving Steiner to take the double spinebuster for the pin.

Rating: D. Another TV match here but in this case keeping it short was the right idea. This feud isn’t interesting and Test vs. Steiner isn’t likely to be much better. Fighting over Stacy is fine, but it would be better if they could have anything resembling a good match. The tag division needs La Resistance though, even if they’re not all that interesting of a team.

Stacy stays behind to check on Steiner.

Mr. America arrives and runs into Gregory Helms, who has been told that he’s Hulk Hogan. America’s sources have told him that Helms is really the Hurricane. They agree that their sources are idiots. Clever idea but it’s hard to buy Hogan’s push meaning much when he’s having a match with Roddy Piper.

Eddie Guerrero has found a replacement partner for the injured Chavo. It’s Tajiri, who gets a gold medal and knows that they lie, cheat and steal.

Tag Team Titles: Team Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero/Tajiri

Eddie and Tajiri are challenging in a ladder match. The brawl starts in the aisle as the champs aren’t happy with Eddie destroying their framed picture of Angle earlier in the week. Eddie gets sent into the ladder, leaving Tajiri to get double teamed inside. A gorilla press drop onto Haas’ knee has Eddie in more trouble and it’s time for another ladder. Tajiri seems to mess up a dive over the top so Eddie dives over the top onto Shelton to get the focus back.

The champs go for the belts but Tajiri breaks it up with the handspring elbow. Haas gets crotched by the ladder in the corner and it’s time for a second ladder. Shelton pulls Tajiri off the ladder, sending him face first into one of the rungs for a scary looking crash. Thankfully he’s ok, though Eddie isn’t quite as good thanks to a powerslam into the ladder in the corner. In a creative spot, Haas puts Tajiri across a ladder and bridges it over the top, leaving Shelton to jump off the ladder, over Haas, and onto Tajiri’s back.

Eddie has to make a save with Haas falling out to the floor in a heap but then wedges the ladder in the corner instead of going up. Naturally he gets sent into the ladder for his efforts, satisfying wrestling rule #3. Tajiri is back up with the hard kicks to the face and he runs them over with the ladder for good measure. The Tarantula has Haas in trouble but it’s Shelton making the save with a shot from the ladder.

Back in and the champs beat on Eddie but Shelton gets monkey flipped into the ladder into Haas to put everyone down again. Eddie sends Benjamin outside but the champs are back up for the save. Benjamin is knocked right back down, only to have Eddie frog splash him instead of going for the belts for no apparent reason. Charlie and Eddie go up and this time it’s a sunset bomb to bring Haas right back down. Tajiri is finally back up to mist Shelton, allowing Eddie to pull down the titles for the win.

Rating: B-. Good though not a great match here. This would have been a much better match with Chavo involved (As in it would have made more sense. Tajiri’s work was fine.) but as it is, it feels kind of thrown together. That’s not on the wrestlers of course, but at least they made it work as well as they could.

Bischoff and Austin think they should sign Eddie but Austin makes Bischoff eat a hamburger and have another beer. Hang on though as Austin has to make fun of the way Eric drinks, including opening the box to get the crowd even more on his side. This eats up way too much time.

Chris Jericho thinks he’ll win the Intercontinental Title when Roddy Piper comes in to make fun of him. They insult each other’s talk shows and Chris brings up Piper ripping the kid’s leg off on Thursday. That was an accident though, just like Jericho being born. They both promise to win their matches tonight and that’s about it.

We get a very nice video on the history of the Intercontinental Title before the battle royal to bring it back. They cover a good chunk of the title’s history and show off some great moments. As usual, WWE knows how to do its history well.

Intercontinental Title: Battle Royal

Booker T., Christian, Lance Storm, Chris Jericho, Goldust, Kane, Val Venis, Test, Rob Van Dam

The title is vacant coming in and only Booker isn’t a former champion. Naturally, Pat Patterson gets to come out and hold up the title. And yes it’s Venis, as the Chief Morely gimmick is officially gone. After some VERY long entrances, we’re ready to go. Everyone goes after Kane to start (well duh) but he shrugs them off without much effort and gets rid of Storm. With Van Dam down, the others are able to get rid of Kane but he comes back in to beat everyone up.

Booker is up first and dumps Test, followed by Goldust doing the same to Venis. Jericho tosses Van Dam and we’re down to Christian, Goldust, Booker and Jericho in about two minutes. Then why not just do a four way for the title? It turns into a glorified tag match with the good guys fighting back so Goldust can hit Shattered Dreams on both guys. Booker does a Spinarooni to celebrate but Goldust tries an elimination. That’s fine with Booker, who dumps him out without too much trouble.

That leaves Booker and the Canadians and the double teaming is on in a hurry. Booker fights off an elimination attempt though and throws Jericho over, only to have him skin the cat in an always impressive move. Back in and the now bloody (not bad) Jericho forearms Booker down but Christian shoves him over the top during a Lionsault attempt.

Booker kicks Christian down and scores with a flapjack but the referee gets bumped. If you can’t book a nine man battle royal without a ref bump, you might just kind of suck at your job. As you might expect, Booker dumps Christian but no one sees it, leaving Christian to deck Patterson. Booker gets belted as well and Christian tosses him to win the title. As you might expect, Austin does nothing to fix this and the fans’ chants for GOLDBERG go unrequited.

Rating: D. That ending actually made my head hurt. How in the world do you overbook a battle royal that doesn’t even last twelve minutes? Christian winning is fine, but there are other ways you can make it work. Have he and Jericho as the final two and then have Christian dump Jericho out. That’s not even cheating but makes him look like a villain at the same time. Why is that so complicated?

Sable and Torrie get catty before the bikini contest. I think this is supposed to be Sable hitting on her again. If Sable wants one of the Divas this badly, go after Dawn Marie who seems to be more into it.

We recap Sable vs. Torrie, which is as obvious of an idea as you can get.

Tazz is hosting, which is only slightly better than Lawler. Lillian Garcia sings Torrie to the ring as they’re putting a little too much thought and effort into this. She sings the chorus three times as this is going on WAY too long already. Anyway, both get fifteen seconds to disrobe and gyrate.

They both do their thing and the fans say it’s a tie, even though Sable’s reaction was clearly louder. The fact that her swimsuit was smaller has no bearing on this at all I assure you. Actually hang on though as Sable takes off the swimsuit she’s wearing to reveal a smaller one, which is enough for Tazz to give her the win. Torrie gives Sable a rather passionless kiss to end things.

Austin torments Bischoff with more food and beer.

Piper rants to Sean O’Haire about Jericho when Vince McMahon comes in. Roddy better be ready because it’s a big night for the boss. Without Piper there would be no Hogan and now Piper is the epitome of ruthless aggression.

We look at Piper attacking the fan who Mr. America had waving the flag, resulting in the fan’s artificial leg being ripped off. Piper seemed upset but Vince didn’t buy it, which was all the proof he needed to send Piper after America’s mask. As usual, there is so much wrong/stupid about that idea, I don’t even know where to start so we’ll move on.

Roddy Piper vs. Mr. America

America brings out a chair, presumably to counteract Sean. Actually it’s for Zack Gowen, the fan whose leg was ripped off. So to clarify: this story is now about Vince, Stephanie, Piper, Mr. America and Gowen. After those five people is Sean O’Haire, whose lone match in this whole thing was a less than five minute match with Rikishi, where Piper had to help him win. And people wonder why this period is so loathed. America gets double teamed to start until Sean is sent outside.

Some right hands get America out of trouble and as the referee yells at O’Haire, the mask comes up to bite Piper. So I’m assuming Vince isn’t watching the match and can’t see 90% of Hogan’s face there? O’Haire pulls America to the floor for some right hands, allowing Piper to whip him with the weightlifting belt. We hit a terrible sleeper until it’s time to America up. The big boot connects but here’s Vince so Piper can get in a low blow. O’Haire brings in a pipe but hits Piper instead, setting up the legdrop to give America the pin as Gowen holds Vince back.

Rating: F. Of course it was terrible but at least they kept it fairly short. As anyone could have guessed at the beginning of this thing though, it’s not doing anyone other than Hogan and Vince any good. Unfortunately that includes O’Haire, who has gone from what should be a can’t miss prospect to a bumbling lackey who can’t do anything right.

Stephanie McMahon tells HHH to be careful.

We recap HHH vs. Kevin Nash, which is over Nash coming back and not liking HHH and Shawn Michaels fighting. HHH then attacked Nash for not picking the right side and we have a World Title match as a result, despite Nash making Roman Reigns like Hogan in the 80s.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Kevin Nash

HHH is defending and Ric Flair and Shawn Michaels are the seconds. I’m not sure who was thinking it’s a good idea to have Flair come out in his own entrance in Charlotte if they want Nash to be cheered but this show has bigger problems to deal with. The brawl is on in the aisle before the bell with Shawn and Flair fighting to the back. I doubt we’ll be seeing them again.

Nash and HHH slug it out on the floor with the bell ringing shortly thereafter. A backdrop has the champ in early trouble as JR is already saying this isn’t going to be the highest quality match. Nash hits a big forearm and flips the hair so you know it’s serious. HHH finally gets in a neckbreaker to get us up to about five moves in the first three minutes. Nash is back with more right hands and a shove to the referee, who pulls him off by the hair. He’ll never referee in this town again.

HHH gives us the required ref bump and a low blow before taking the turnbuckle pad off. Nash comes back with the usual but gets sent into the exposed buckle. The Pedigree gets two with the kickout earning a slightly disturbing positive reaction. A backdrop puts HHH on the floor and he comes back in with the sledgehammer to knock the referee down for the DQ.

Rating: F+. Only because it was slightly more watchable than Hogan vs. Piper. The match didn’t even last as long as their brawl a few weeks back and now the feud gets to keep going because they’re friends. Nash showed that he was washed up in 1999 and has only gotten worse in the years since. It was as bad as you would expect and a World Title match going less than eight minutes on pay per view is pretty unacceptable.

Nash beats up HHH because THIS MUST CONTINUE. He grabs the hammer and stalks HHH up the aisle, setting up a Jackknife through the announcers’ table.

Austin makes Bischoff eat jalapenos and vomiting ensues.

Women’s Title: Jazz vs. Victoria vs. Trish Stratus vs. Jacqueline

Jazz is defending and this is one fall to a finish. It’s a brawl to start until the villains are sent outside, leaving Trish to counter an early wristlock. Victoria and Jazz come back in with with the champ hitting some double chickenwing facebusters. Trish gets caught in the STF and Jacqueline puts Victoria in the half crab at the same time.

It’s Trish getting to the rope first so Jazz can kick Jacqueline for the save. After a Matrish to avoid a clothesline (Lawler: “Trish just got reloaded!”), the Chick Kick gets two on Jazz. The Stratusfaction is broken up with Trish being thrown over the top and landing face first on the floor in a scary crash. Back in and Jacqueline suplexes Victoria, only to get DDT’d to retain Jazz’s title.

Rating: D. That Trish landing looked great (and rather scary) but the time and a lack of a story killed whatever they could do here. What are you supposed to get out of a sub five minute match that you could probably see on Raw? The division is still dying for some fresh blood as these four can only fight so long. We passed that point months ago but it’s still the same lineup every month.

Trish has a cut lip and stares at Jazz, again meaning this must continue.

We recap the main event. Big Show attacked Rey Mysterio at Backlash so tonight it’s Brock Lesnar standing up to the monster in a stretcher match.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show

Lesnar is defending and you have to put your opponent on the stretcher and get it over the finish line. During the entrances, Cole mentions that this is the first stretcher match in the company in 17 years since Andre the Giant vs. Killer Khan in 1986. You really would think he would get it right after all these weeks but alas, Cole isn’t that bright (it was 1981). Also, Show brings a stretcher backboard with him with Mysterio, Benoit and Lesnar written on the back. Only Mysterio’s name is crossed off, making Show look even lamer than usual.

Lesnar wastes no time in taking over and hitting Show with the board to knock him outside. A few more shots have Show in trouble and Brock sends him into the board, which is in front of the post. Show is back up and drops him across the stretcher before hitting Brock in the back with the backboard. A chokeslam plants Lesnar in the ring as I wonder why there’s a referee inside with them.

Show drops a leg onto Lesnar onto the board and it’s stretcher time. The champ kicks his way off though and a few backboard shots has Show in trouble. Some choking with a camera cord and Lesnar puts Show on the stretcher as the announcers say it can’t be done. Seriously it’s not that big of a deal. Show fights out again so Lesnar rams the stretcher into his ribs.

A tug of war goes to Show….and he throws the stretcher down and puts its pad on another stretcher. More backboard (albeit from a different backboard) have Lesnar in trouble as this just keeps going. Back up and Brock knocks him off the apron and onto/back off of the stretcher. As Cole incorrectly says the first WWE Champion was crowned forty years ago yesterday (it was forty years ago yesterday that Bruno won the title to become the second champion), Rey Mysterio comes out to distracts Show.

The distraction lets Brock drive a freaking forklift into the arena and dive off the thing with a crossbody/clothesline. A suplex into the F5 (more of an AA) allow Lesnar to throw him onto the forklift (Why can’t he just put him onto the stretcher then?) and wheel him across the finish line to retain.

Rating: D+. This could have been a lot worse and it needed about five minutes cut out but it was a watchable enough main event. The problem here was the stretcher rule was completely tacked on and Show only having one of the three names crossed off made me shake my head. They should have done a last man standing match here or something like that, though it’s not terrible or anything.

Overall Rating: D-. Yeah this really didn’t work in the slightest. The ladder match was good and the main event was watchable but everything else was anywhere from terrible to a disaster. Aside from the America vs. Piper match and the awful World Title match, everything on here felt either unimportant or worth your time. Nothing on here felt like it needed to be on a pay per view and that scares the heck out of me considering the single branded shows start in June. Really bad here and that’s not surprising when you consider the TV leading up to it.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/10/02/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-the-intercontinental-title-updated-version/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6