No Mercy 2002
Date: October 20, 2002
Location: Alltel Arena, North Little Rock, Arkansas
Attendance: 9,074
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is one of those rare shows where the Brand Split really changes everything. On the Smackdown side we have what could be an incredible bloodbath inside the Cell between Brock Lesnar and Undertaker, plus a potential match of the year candidate as Rey Mysterio and Edge face Kurt Angle and Chris Benoit for the inaugural Smackdown Tag Team Titles. On the Raw side: Kane being accused of a murderer and necrophiliac and something about unifying titles. Wrestling is weird sometimes no? Let’s get to it.

Undertaker is in the locker room when Kane sits down next to him. Kane: “So how was your week?”

The opening video focuses on the two main events with Heyman implying that Undertaker will die inside the Cell and never get to see his soon to be born baby.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Christian/Chris Jericho vs. Goldust/Booker T.

Christian and Jericho are defending after winning the titles on Monday though this is mostly about Jericho vs. Booker. In a bad sign for the future of their title reign, the champs come out separately. Then again so do the challengers so not only do the entrances take forever but tag team wrestling seems to be dying.

Booker clotheslines Christian down to start but goes after Jericho instead of following up. Not that it really matters as he sidekicks Christian and brings Goldust in to keep the champs in trouble. Jericho gets catapulted over the top onto Christian but a quick necksnap across the top rope finally puts the champs in control.

Christian is intelligent enough to knock Booker off the apron so there’s no one for Goldust to tag. I love the simple but smart ideas like that as they always work. Goldust’s powerslam has Christian writhing in pain and Booker looking at his own hand. The hot tag brings in Booker to clean house but he misses the ax kick. Instead it’s a spinebuster for two on Jericho, only to have Christian pull Chris out of the way of the side kick.

A blind tag allows Goldust to hit Shattered Dreams on Christian but Jericho grabs the Walls. Booker makes the save and gets in the Spinarooni so here’s Christian with a title belt. The big shot misses so Jericho tries the springboard dropkick, only to have the rope break. Jericho bulldogs Goldust onto the title instead and drops a top rope moonsault to retain.

Rating: C. The rope break hurt things a bit but Jericho was more than good enough to keep things safe. That being said, the match wasn’t all that great in the first place but it did its job. The problem though is how much fire Goldust and especially Booker T. lose every day they don’t win the titles. I really don’t get why Jericho and Christian need the titles and Booker is really needing to win something other than a nothing match against Big Show soon.

Funaki interviews Al Wilson, which is little more than a way to recap the Dawn Marie vs. Torrie feud. The big question: why was Al in his clothes in the shower? Al says he did not have sexual relations with that woman (remember this is Arkansas) so Funaki concludes that Al can’t speak English. Odds are this was a way to fill in time to repair the ring, which is totally understandable.

Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson

Torrie gets in some bad clotheslines and sunset flips Dawn to really show the anger and hatred. Dawn snaps her throat first across the top rope and the slow stomping ensues. We hit a chinlock as these two are actually way better than anything Stacy and Terri have done. They may not be good but at least they’re trying to have a match instead of all the nonsense we normally get. Torrie comes back with the catfight and the referee gets crushed. He doesn’t let go when it’s over though and Dawn has to yell at him. Torrie catapults her into the corner and gets a neckbreaker (nearly a Diamond Cutter) for the pin.

Rating: F+. Yeah what else were you expecting here? This feud is over a bikini contest, a lingerie contest and Dawn Marie being in the shower with a guy in his 50s or 60s. Were you expecting a classic match here? I’ll give them some minor points for trying but there’s only so much you can do when the women belong in a beginners’ class instead of live pay per view.

Torrie yells at Dawn and says that was for her dad. Uh, Torrie, your dad was in the shower with her. I don’t think he really wants revenge at the moment.

Rob Van Dam doesn’t think much of Ric Flair’s standard catchphrases because he’s a chair smashing, frog splash, risk taking yinning and yanging Van Daminating dude. Between each item on that list, Van Dam threw in a little strut which looked more like dancing. It’s not exactly funny but Van Dam isn’t known for nailing the promos.

Heyman and Lesnar walk through the back and Tracy (the woman who accused Undertaker of cheating on his wife) says the same stuff she has every day.

Ric Flair vs. Rob Van Dam

Fallout from last month where Flair helped HHH to beat Van Dam and retain the title. Van Dam jumps him before the bell and hits the spinning leg to Flair’s back. The top rope kick to the chest gives us the opening bell, even though the referee was counting them on the floor. Some right hands to the face and another kick to the chest give Van Dam two until a low blow cuts him off.

It’s already time to go for the knee with a chop block, stomps and a wrap around the ropes. Another chop block sets up more stomping so let’s talk about Tracy being attractive. There’s the Figure Four for a bit until Rob rolls over to the ropes. Back up and Van Dam misses a dropkick but blocks another Figure Four with a small package. Flair gets slammed off the top, hit with Rolling Thunder and pinned with the Five Star.

Rating: D. I know that sounded like it was just going through the motions and it’s exactly what the match felt like. This was all about keeping things as basic as they could and you could connect the dots for what was going to happen about a minute into the match. I guess this is Van Dam’s consolation prize for getting crushed last month so he must feel better now. Really boring stuff here as neither guy seemed to be trying.

Big Show complains about something to Stephanie when Bischoff comes in to say Raw talent shouldn’t be talking to the Smackdown boss. That goes badly as Show rants about how he hasn’t been on pay per view since July and hasn’t main evented in forever. Bischoff yells at him and gets grabbed by the jacket for some sneering threats.

Here’s the history of the Intercontinental Title video from Monday. It’s a good video but this screams filler.

Cruiserweight Title: Tajiri vs. Jamie Noble

Jamie is defending and has Nidia with him. For the third time in four matches, someone is attacked before the bell. That really is hard to defend and shouldn’t be happening. Tajiri’s moonsault to the floor gets two at the bell and a kneedrop is good for the same. Jamie’s sunset flip doesn’t work as Tajiri rolls forward through the ropes (nice counter) but a running electric chair gives the champ two. A tilt-a-whirl slam sets up a bow and arrow as the back work continues.

Tajiri can’t fight up yet and Jamie drops an elbow to the back to keep him down. The announcers make sex jokes about Nidia as Tajiri avoids a charge and grabs a wicked tornado DDT. Tajiri’s kick and strike rush set up a spinwheel kick for two. A bridging German suplex gets the same and there’s the Tarantula. Tajiri gets in the Buzzsaw Kick but Nidia kisses the referee, allowing Noble to come back with the Tiger Bomb for a close two. Another Tiger Bomb is countered and Tajiri tries a victory roll, only to have Nidia trip Jamie up (and reset his balance), allowing him to get a rollup to retain.

Rating: B-. I dug this a lot more than I was expecting to as the psychology was working fine and the ending makes sense. The problem here though is how far the cruiserweight division has sunk. There’s just nothing to the thing right now but that’s been the case for a long time. Noble is a talented guy but a redneck champion isn’t the most thrilling character in the world.

Tajiri kisses Nidia and kicks Noble post match.

Chris Benoit finds Eddie Guerrero and tells him that Chavo is getting beaten up in a locker room. Eddie hears him screaming but thinks it’s the same trick he and Chavo pulled on Benoit a few weeks back. He says that’s a little girl screaming (That’s better?) instead of Chavo but the door opens and Chavo stumbles out. Angle follows him with a big smile and security holds Uncle Eddie back. Funny stuff to go with the great wrestling. Is there any doubt as to why Smackdown is better?

We recap Kane vs. HHH, which is based off Kane being on the biggest roll he’s had in years. Then HHH accused him of murdering a woman named Katie Vick (and possibly violating her corpse). Both of the Raw singles titles are on the line with the winner getting the World Title while the Intercontinental Title will be retired no matter what.

Raw World Title/Intercontinental Title: HHH vs. Kane

Technically they’re both defending but I’ll only call HHH champion because Kane’s title doesn’t mean anything. A hard right hand knocks HHH into the corner and even more of them have the champ rocked. Kane kicks him under the ropes and into the barricade but gets caught in a neckbreaker back inside.

HHH posts him to really slow Kane down and it’s time to stomp away. A spinebuster gets two and it’s time to choke as this is in the slow HHH style you would expect. Since the match hasn’t been uninteresting enough yet, we hit the sleeper. Thankfully the day of the sleeper has passed though and Kane powers out for the side slam.

Cue Flair and the ref gets bumped as Kane beats HHH up even more. Flair slips HHH the title for two as Hurricane comes out to cancel out Ric. And never mind as HHH Pedigrees him on the floor, likely for getting a nice pop. The chokeslam is broken up and the ref is bumped again, followed by the chokeslam through the table.

Flair brings in the sledgehammer to no avail as JR says NOTHING is going to stop Kane tonight. NOTHING you see. The Tombstone is countered with a hammer shot but Kane pops back up for the chokeslam. Somehow the referee is STILL down though so here’s a replacement….who Flair pulls to the floor. That earns Flair a chokeslam but the Pedigree retains the title.

Rating: D. This reminds me of the volleyball game in Scooby-Doo and the Ghoul School: one shenanigan after another with what’s supposed to be the main focus going on in the background. This was a boring wrestling match with about six minutes of insanity at the end, which doesn’t make for a good use of the time. You can add Kane to the list of people whose life was destroyed by HHH and then he gets to lose the title match. Oh and now there’s no midcard title because no one needs one of those around.

Stephanie is in her office when Tracy comes in. They talk about relationships and Tracy says she doesn’t care what happens as long as she gets Undertaker back. Confidentially though, she’s been lying about almost everything. Yes she actually says confidentially and we’re again supposed to ignore the camera. Undertaker comes in after having heard everything (How?) and Tracy is thrown out.

We recap the Tag Team Title tournament with the main focus being on Angle and Benoit not being allowed to fight each other, even though they can’t stand one another.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Kurt Angle/Chris Benoit vs. Edge/Rey Mysterio

This should be amazing. Again, four separate entrances. Angle and Mysterio start things off with Kurt sending him into the corner for some slaps to the back of the head. Get in the embarrassment stuff while you can I guess. Angle wants Edge but Rey isn’t ready to tag out and stomps on Angle’s foot. The ensuing charge is countered into a drop toehold so Rey can smack Kurt in the back of the head.

NOW he’ll tag Edge in and for some reason he tries to get technical with Angle which goes as well as you would expect. Benoit comes in and grinds away on a headlock as Cole describes the upcoming Cell match as a “treat”. Thankfully Tazz is right there to say a treat is something like a lollipop, not a violent match. Edge gets two off a flapjack and spears Angle off the apron but Benoit gets in a clothesline to take over.

Off to a rear naked choke from Angle with Tazz pointing out that Kurt made sure that Edge could see Rey, making him feel helpless because he couldn’t get there. Tazz didn’t get analytical often but he was good when he did. It’s back to Benoit for the rolling German suplexes but he takes too long going up and gets superplexed right back down. The hot tag brings in Mysterio so house can be cleaned, including a top rope legdrop as Benoit is draped across the ropes.

Not that it matters as Benoit grabs the Crossface with Edge having to make a save. The 619 is countered but Edge missile dropkicks Rey in the back to knock him onto Benoit for a near fall. Rey goes up but Angle runs the ropes for the belly to belly superplex. Things settle back down with Angle working on Rey’s back before grabbing a front facelock. Some clotheslines drop Rey but he bulldogs Benoit and makes the hot tag off to Edge for the house cleaning.

Everything breaks down and Benoit gets his bronco busted, followed by the toss into the top rope hurricanrana for Angle. Benoit headbutts his partner by mistake but Angle gets back up for the rolling German suplexes. Rey charges at Edge who suplexes his partner into something like a Cannonball on Angle. Benoit comes back in and Crossfaces Benoit until Rey gets in a 619 for the save.

There’s the Angle Slam to Mysterio but Edge reverses the ankle lock into a small package for an INCREDIBLE near fall. Back up and Edge throws Rey over the top for a moonsault onto Benoit but Kurt ankle locks Edge, which is reversed into an ankle lock on Kurt. You know Angle isn’t having that though as he reverses into another ankle lock to make Edge tap for the titles.

Rating: A+. I don’t think this one needs much of an explanation. Those last five to seven minutes were outstanding with some great near falls and some of the best action you’ll see. This is the kind of stuff that you only get when everyone is making each other better and it makes for some outstanding action. Check this match out if you haven’t before and you’ll see why it’s so revered.

Undertaker gets an injection to numb his hand for the main event.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Trish is defending after Victoria accused her of sleeping her way into the company. They get aggressive to start with Trish knocking her to the floor and sending Victoria into the post. Victoria comes back by dropping her face first off the barricade before not getting the best elevation off a monkey flip. Lawler talks about the girls’ chests as Victoria grabs an over the shoulder backbreaker. An electric chair brings Victoria out of the corner and they slug it out again with Trish scoring with the Chick Kick for two (and getting up before the kickout). Stratusfaction is broken up but an O’Connor Roll retains the title.

Rating: C+. This was one of the better women’s matches in a long time as, commentary aside, this was a match where the gender wasn’t the focus for a change. Instead it was all about the action, which is a big reason today’s women’s wrestling is so much better than its predecessors. It’s still not a great era for the division but at least they had two women who were ready to fight here. Good match here and a very nice surprise.

Rikishi is at the World and hopes the Cell isn’t as bad for Lesnar as it was for him back in 2000. He picks Undertaker.

We recap Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar, which is a rematch from last month. Last time they went to a double DQ so this time it’s inside the Cell because they keep fighting. Undertaker has a broken had but is allowed to use the cast. This was treated as a major deal because Stephanie doesn’t understand how the Cell works.

Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending inside the Cell. I love all the little tears in the Cell walls from the years of use. Undertaker misses some cast shots to start and gets caught in a great looking powerslam. Not that it matters as the first cast shot has Lesnar in trouble and it’s time for a breather on the floor. Brock finally goes after THE BIG CAST ON UNDERTAKER’S HAND and shockingly enough, it works quite well. A second cast to the head busts Lesnar open and has Paul screaming NO over and over in a nice touch.

Undertaker sends him into various metal objects and the blood is just flowing down Lesnar’s chest and shoulders. A ram into the cage wall gets two on the floor, which I don’t believe you could do before. Lesnar is launched hard into the wall and a hard cast shot makes things even worse. Undertaker goes to the top and drops an awkward looking knee as Brock is on the apron for two more on the outside. That didn’t get much of a reaction and it’s not the biggest surprise given how awkward it looked.

Undertaker kicks Heyman through the cage to bust him open as well. One heck of a whip sends Lesnar hard into the steps but he finally posts Undertaker for a breather. Now it’s time to get creative as Brock steals Undertaker’s belt to tie him to the Cell by the hand. A series of chair shots to the cast should completely shatter the hand but Undertaker punches away instead.

Lesnar gets the cast off and for some reason it’s odd to see Undertaker’s bare hand. Instead of stomping on the hand or grabbing it (like common sense would suggest), Brock sits Undertaker on top and grabs the top of the cage for some jumping kicks. Undertaker kicks him down in a hurry and drops a top rope elbow for two. In an even bigger surprise, Undertaker busts out a suicide dive of all things (and it didn’t look bad either).

Lesnar gets back up and BLASTS Undertaker with the steps, busting him open so badly that you can see the blood falling off his head and onto the floor. With his face completely covered in blood, Undertaker slugs away with the broken hand as there is blood on the camera lens.

Old School is broken up so Undertaker escapes the F5 and gets two off a chokeslam. Lesnar’s Last Ride is countered and the real thing gets two (with Undertaker’s blood DRIPPING INTO LESNAR’S MOUTH) as Brock grabs the ropes. Shouldn’t that not count in a falls count anywhere match? Not that it matters as Undertaker loads up the Tombstone but Brock counters and gets the F5 to retain.

Rating: B. This is a tricky one as the story of the match (Undertaker’s broken hand) was almost completely forgotten about halfway through. That being said, all the blood was more than enough to make up for it as this was one of the most violent matches I’ve seen in a long time. Given how the PG era works today, it really does make for a sharp change of pace and that’s a good thing at times. There might be too much blood here for some tastes but the action and violence is very entertaining if it’s your style.

Brock climbs the Cell to pose with the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. I liked this one a lot more than I was expecting to, which is saying a lot how weak the card gets after the top two matches. The lineups are still pretty weak at the moment and as usual, the Smackdown half more than out shined the other half. There good stuff here but there’s also quite a bit of bad and unfortunately there seems to be more of the latter, at least in total matches.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 13, 2017
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s the final show in the famous Joe Louis Arena and we’re getting closer to Wrestlemania XXXIII. The big story seems to be Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns, which was made official earlier in the day. That leaves the Universal Title match between Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg, assuming one or both of them are actually booked for the show. Let’s get to it.

In Memory of Ron Bass.

We open with a recap of Lesnar taking Goldberg out last week.

Here are Paul Heyman and Lesnar to open things up. Heyman can’t believe that something happened last week because Goldberg was supposed to be unstoppable. In twenty nights at Wrestlemania, Lesnar is going to prove the world wrong and destroy Goldberg in short order. Heyman teases Goldberg being here but says the champ isn’t in the arena. Every time Lesnar has run into Goldberg it’s been spear, Jackhammer, Goldberg. Last week though it was F5, Lesnar. At Wrestlemania, it’s an F5 to end the great comeback because the F5 means Goldberg goes down. I still don’t know why I’d want to see this match again.

Stephanie McMahon and Mick Foley are in the back with Stephanie talking about how Foley isn’t the best businessman. She’s his manager and needs to develop him so he can grow in abilities. Tonight it’s time for Foley’s first lesson: by the end of the night, he needs to fire someone.

Sasha Banks vs. Dana Brooke

Dana takes her into the corner to start but gets rolled (with a handful of tights) for the pin at 1:18. It’s as sudden as it sounds.

Post match Charlotte gets in the ring and yells at Dana for losing. She sounds like she’s about to fire Dana but Dana hits her in the face and the beating is on. Charlotte eventually gets away from a yelling Dana.

Eric LeGrande, a former Rutgers football player who suffered a spinal injury, is getting the Warrior Award.

Brian Kendrick/Tony Nese vs. Akira Tozawa/TJ Perkins

Kendrick trips Tozawa to start but gets sent to the floor for a kick from Perkins as we take a break. Back with Nese forearming Tozawa in the face and grabbing a bodyscissors. Tozawa finally gets up and dives over for the tag as everything breaks down. Nese knees Perkins in the face for two but gets caught by a good looking springboard DDT for the same. Another knee sets up some face communication though as Perkins crashes into Tozawa, setting up a rollup with a handful of Perkins’ tights for the pin at 9:00.

Rating: C. Let me make sure I’ve got this straight: Raw has however many writers and bookers and we get two straight matches ending in a rollup with a handful of tights? You can’t throw feet on the ropes or something like that? The match itself was a bit disjointed and longer than it needed to be, though I’m still interested in Kendrick vs. Tozawa.

Anderson and Gallows don’t know why they can’t get any attention in the tag team division.

Here’s Kevin Owens (in a snazzy KO Mania II shirt which looks like a Wrestlemania II shirt and a good piece of masking tape) for a tag match. Before anyone else comes out though, Owens says it’s time to get the spotlight back where it belongs. After a clip of the Festival of Friendship, Owens says Jericho was never his friend and the feeling was mutual. Then he’ll take the US Title at Wrestlemania, leaving only the tears of Jericho. “Cry them out man.” Besides, who needs Jericho when you have a destroyer on your side?

Kevin Owens/Samoa Joe vs. Sami Zayn/Chris Jericho

Owens starts with Jericho but Kevin tags out instead of fighting (like a good heel is supposed to do). Sami comes in and takes a beating of his own, including a backsplash from Joe. It’s back to Owens who catches Jericho with a superkick off the apron, only to have Sami hit a big flip dive but he comes up holding his knee. Owens goes right after the knee and it’s time for some double stomping, drawing a DQ at 3:45.

Rating: C-. I always fall for the selling but the fact that they went to a DQ so fast doesn’t give me good feelings about Sami. You could see the knee hit the ground and then they went to a very fast finish in a match that feels like it should have gone a lot longer than four minutes. It was good while it lasted but this has me worried.

Post match Owens and Jericho go at it until the double teaming gets the better of Chris.

Stephanie suggests that Foley fire Sami Zayn when Nia Jax comes in. Nia wants justice by being added to the Women’s Title match. Stephanie gives her a match with Bayley tonight.

Jinder Mahal demands that he’s not fired tonight because Rusev was holding him back. He wants a match to prove himself, so Foley gives him Roman Reigns.

New Day has their own talk show segment called New Day Talks, which means Big Show as their first guest. Big Show talks about the Jetsons movie until Titus O’Neil comes in to call the show stupid. Titus shoves Show as New Day eats popcorn. Woods: “Here’s your lesson: Titus O’Neil ruins everything!”

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

The winners get Anderson and Gallows at Wrestlemania. Before the match, Enzo shills his cuppa haters coffee cup and Cass talks about how they’re not the #1 seed but rather the bracket busters. Cesaro and Sheamus clean house to start before a standoff takes us to the first break. Back with Cesaro blasting Enzo with a clothesline and the double teaming begins. Enzo slips away and makes the hot tag to Cass, who eats a top rope clothesline. Sheamus can’t get the ten forearms as Cass kicks him to the floor, only to have Anderson and Gallows come in for the no contest at 8:01.

Rating: D+. ENOUGH WITH THE FREAKING TRIPLE THREATS ALREADY!!! JUST PICK A TEAM OR DROP THE WHOLE THING BECAUSE NO ONE CARES ABOUT THESE TITLES IN THE FIRST PLACE!!! This is the first match I would cut from the 13 or 14 match Wrestlemania card and now it’s likely going to be a three way instead of just giving Enzo and Cass the belts the next night on Raw which would guarantee a huge pop and also let the pay per view breathe a little bit.

Anderson and Gallows destroy both teams.

We look back at the end of last week’s show.

Post break Anderson and Gallows laugh at Foley for getting one over on him because there were no winners. Say it with me: triple threat match.

Roman Reigns vs. Jinder Mahal

An early Samoan drop gets two on Mahal and Roman pounds away in the corner until the Undertaker’s gong strikes. The distraction lets Mahal getting a knee to the face and a sitout slam gets two. Not that it matters as back to back Superman Punches put Jinder away at 2:54.

Post match Reigns calls Undertaker out and we take a break. Back from a break with Reigns still in the ring and Shawn Michaels coming out. Reigns says it’s nice to see him but he wanted to see the Undertaker. Shawn says he saw Reigns get distracted by the gong and that can’t happen going into Wrestlemania. We’re twenty days from Wrestlemania and Undertaker is already in Reigns’ head. At Wrestlemania, Undertaker is going to eat Roman alive.

Reigns says that’s not happening because Undertaker needs to be wondering what it’s going to be like to be in the ring with him. Shawn says he’s in Reigns’ yard but Roman needs to get his head on straight. That’s not enough for Roman, because he remembers Undertaker retired Shawn at Wrestlemania. Come Orlando, Reigns is retiring Undertaker. Reigns goes to leave and gets run over by Braun Strowman, who earns himself a THANK YOU STROWMAN chant.

Stephanie is pleased but Foley is still upset over the firing order. Mick doesn’t want to do it because we’re so close to Wrestlemania (and there’s NO OTHER WRESTLING SHOW for anyone to wrestle on) but Stephanie says do it or she will.

We look back at Austin Aries decking Neville last week and defeating Tony Nese the next night on 205 Live.

Austin Aries vs. Ariya Daivari

Aries forearms him in the face to start before snapping off some armdrags. A nasty backdrop sends Aries face first into the apron. Not that it matters though as Aries hits a neckbreaker onto the knee, followed by the roaring elbow for the pin at 3:48.

Rating: D+. Not enough time for this to go anywhere but I’m glad they’re setting up the Cruiserweight Title match by actually having Aries win a few matches. It’s clear that we’re getting Aries vs. Neville for the title but there’s no need to just throw it out there. Let them build something up instead and make Aries into something serious.

We look at Heyman’s speech again.

Emma is coming.

Titus O’Neil vs. Big Show

A chop, a slam and three chokeslams end Titus at 1:52. That’s all it needed to be.

Billy Jean King Women’s History Month video.

Bayley and Sasha are ready for Nia Jax.

Chris Jericho wants to show the world the real Kevin Owens so next week, the REAL Kevin will be the guest on a special edition of the Highlight Reel. Chris calls the interviewer Tom Phillips but it’s Mike Rome. Jericho doesn’t buy it and puts Tom Phillips on the List.

Bayley vs. Nia Jax

Non-title. Nia throws her into the corner and then out to the floor for a whip into the steps as we take a break. Back with Bayley wrapping the knee around the ropes for a few kicks. Nia pops back up and stomps away in the corner for the DQ at 7:15. Not enough to rate but that’s two DQ’s to go with two pullings of the tights and a no contest tonight.

Nia throws Bayley into the barricade for good measure.

Next week it’s the Highlight Reel and Braun vs. Roman.

Here’s Stephanie to introduce Foley for the firing announcement. Foley hadn’t been able to think of anyone all night but in the last ten minutes, someone’s name came to him and he knows what to do. After thanking Stephanie, he announces……Stephanie should be fired. Stephanie isn’t pleased (of course) and rips into Foley, who talks about how Stephanie lied to him six months ago when she said she had nothing to do with HHH interfering.

Foley goes on about how HHH makes an army for himself but Stephanie cuts him off mid-insult. Cue HHH to say Foley can say this to his face. Foley says that’s fine but he didn’t think HHH really existed. HHH laughs him off and they go back and forth about how Foley doesn’t need this job and HHH uses his position to abuse his power. HHH says Foley needs to leave and go around the world again telling his sad story, but if he does, his kids can forget about working for WWE.

What Foley needs to do is go backstage and have an epiphany about how much he loves his job before doing whatever Stephanie tells him to do. Foley turns to leave but stops as Stephanie rants against the people for not respecting their bosses enough. HHH goes after Foley and gets Mr. Socko for his efforts. Stephanie makes the save with a low blow and HHH unbuttons his sleeves. Cue Seth Rollins on a crutch but it’s quickly thrown to the side. Rollins comes in and hammers away but HHH grabs the crutch and hits him in the bad knee. HHH even busts out a reverse Figure Four to make Rollins scream to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a really different kind of show as they were getting ready for Wrestlemania so most of the wrestling and action wasn’t important (hence all the DQ’s etc). They pushed towards Wrestlemania here and that’s exactly what they needed to do. We already know most of the card so there’s not much of a point to adding anything new (save for a triple threat match of course). The show wasn’t the best but it did its job, which is much more important.

Results

Sasha Banks b. Dana Brooke – Rollup with a handful of tights

Tony Nese/Brian Kendrick b. Akira Tozawa/TJ Perkins – Rollup with a handful of tights

Sami Zayn/Chris Jericho b. Kevin Owens/Samoa Joe via DQ when Joe and Owens double teamed Jericho

Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Cesaro/Sheamus when Anderson and Gallows interfered

Roman Reigns b. Jinder Mahal – Superman Punch

Austin Aries b. Ariya Daivari – Roaring Elbow

Big Show b. Titus O’Neil – Chokeslam

Bayley b. Nia Jax via DQ when Nia attacked in the corner

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Main Event
Date: March 9, 2017
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

Back to the land of the misfit toys that no one cares enough to repair because they weren’t all that fun in the first place. I’m sure we’ll get to hear about how amazing Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg will be, despite it not being likely to last as long as either match on this show is going to be. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Jinder Mahal vs. Curtis Axel

Dang from a pay per view to Main Event in the same week. Some people might say that the Fastlane match was COMPLETELY POINTLESS but I’m not supposed to complain about free wrestling or something. Curtis chops away in the corner as you can see droves of people going to the stairs. A jumping knee to the chin puts Axel down and some kneedrops make things worse. That earns Jinder some angry right hands in the corner and the Hennig necksnap for two. The PerfectPlex is broken up though and Jinder grabs a cobra clutch slam for the pin at 3:46.

Rating: D. For those of you who were begging for Jinder to get his head back you see. Axel continues to be someone whose time has passed and there’s almost no way to recover but at least he got that token Intercontinental Title reign a few years back. These guys are the Main Event Players and it’s no surprise that the match was as meaningless as it was.

Package on Sunday’s main event which is longer than the main event itself.

To Raw!

Here’s Chris Jericho to get us going, which is the absolute best thing they could do to keep the crowd from turning on the show. Tonight is the rebirth of Chris Jericho because last night at Fastlane he screwed Kevin Owens out of the Universal Title. A few weeks ago, Owens took a knife and he stuck it in man.

Jericho wants Owens out here right now so here’s Kevin. Owens starts to talk but Jericho immediately cuts him off and wants to know why he was stabbed in the back. Kevin says there was no stabbing in the back because they were never best friends. Remember who his best friend used to be? Sami Zayn, who Owens stabbed in the back as he would do over and over again.

Jericho is just a tool and Owens did whatever he could to keep the Universal Title. Chris was there to watch his back because he knew what to expect but he was also gullible. Then Jericho outlived his usefulness by accepting the match against Goldberg on Kevin’s behalf. Last night Goldberg would have been outsmarted but Jericho got the better of Kevin last night.

Jericho calls trusting Owens the worst thing he ever could have done but now he has friends around this arena. Chris: “I’ve got the friends of Jericho! CHEER ME ON MAN!” Jericho isn’t done with Owens though because last night was the beginning of a road that ends at Wrestlemania. The match is made but since the show is in a month, let’s have a fight right now. Owens comes down to the ring for the brawl until Samoa Joe comes in to jump Jericho. Sami Zayn runs out with a chair for the save and house is cleaned.

To Monday again.

Here’s Goldberg and EGADS the booing starts when the music stops. Goldberg holds up the title and says it belongs to the people as much as it belongs to him. Goldberg says he has information he’s never mentioned before but the CM PUNK chants start up. He kind of rolls with them but here’s Paul Heyman instead. Heyman knows he’s not man enough to get in the ring with Goldberg but he knows someone who is.

Cue Brock Lesnar for the staredown with Heyman saying that no one is happier for Goldberg than Lesnar himself. Only one of them can walk out as the winner because the other will walk out of Wrestlemania as the loser. Lesnar extends his hand as Goldberg looks at Lesnar, meaning it’s an F5 for the new champ.

Jack Gallagher/Mustafa Ali vs. Tony Nese/Noam Dar

Gallagher does his headstand in the corner to scare Nese off so he brings in Dar to take Ali’s headscissors. You know what that means. Yeah apparently WWE thinks that a basic move on a nothing show is going to get the next Undertaker Loses reaction so CUE THE FREAKING CROWD SHOT.

Back from a break with Ali armdragging Nese into an armbar. Gallagher comes in and gets beaten down as well with the tag formula going full steam ahead. Jack escapes a body vise and makes the hot tag to Ali for the rolling neckbreaker. Gallagher is brought right back in for the headbutts, setting up the inverted 450 to give Ali the pin at 9:15.

Rating: C-. This felt like it was out of the early days of the cruiserweight division and that’s not a good thing. There’s no particular reason for these four to be fighting (or teaming together for that matter) but they had ten minutes to do their thing, which wasn’t all that impressive. It’s certainly not bad but nothing you’ll want to see again.

And now from the end of Raw.

Here’s Strowman to finish what he started last night. Roman’s music starts but is quickly replaced by a gong because here comes Undertaker. The fans are WAY into this staredown but Braun bails into the crowd as the fans cheer for Undertaker. As Undertaker goes to leave, cue Reigns for the real staredown. The fans aren’t quite as into this and boo Reigns out of the building as he says this isn’t about Undertaker. Reigns says it’s his yard now (that’s all this match needed to set it up) and that earns him a chokeslam. We get a shot of the Wrestlemania logo over Undertaker’s shoulder before he walks out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. In what’s becoming a horrible trend, there’s nothing to talk about with the original stuff, which becomes a rather irritating problem. The good thing is that we had a strong Raw to balance things out and give us some good clips. I know there’s a reason for this show to stay around but the lack of effort is getting really tiresome.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: October 10, 2002
Location: America West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re ten days away from No Mercy and the big question is Undertaker’s hand, which was broken last week. That’s not good when he’s heading into the Cell with Brock Lesnar. The other major story is the Tag Team Title tournament, which is almost destined to offer a string of great matches. Let’s get to it.

We open with one of those stuttering recaps with Stephanie McMahon narrating because we watch these shows to hear from her. Anyway we recap Undertaker vs. Lesnar with the OFFICIALLY broken hand (you want to make sure it’s the official one or you won’t be able to get a warranty) and an announcement of the Cell match.

Undertaker is in the parking lot.

Here’s Matt Hardy with something to say. After the WE WANT JEFF chants die down, Matt brags about beating Undertaker for the second time last week. Matt talks about how last week was a defining moment in Mattitude and we see a clip of last week’s pin. Of course we see Undertaker coming to the ring and the beating is on in a hurry. A few headbutts and cast shots open Matt up but he gets in a low blow. That’s fine with Undertaker who casts Matt in the head and then casts a chair into Matt’s head. Undertaker punches the post and Matt FINALLY escapes. This went on far longer than it should have but you have to fill time somehow.

Rikishi vs. Eddie Guerrero

Fallout from last week where Eddie make Mark Henry tap in a tag match. Rikishi doesn’t waste time and grabs a bearhug but Eddie crawls over into a sunset flip. That goes nowhere so Eddie hits a dropkick, allowing Chavo to get in some choking from the floor. The cheating earns Uncle Eddie a spinebuster but he goes after the knee and scores with the slingshot hilo for no cover.

The frog splash misses though and Rikishi loads up the Stinkface, meaning Chavo has to make another save. That means Rikishi superkicks him into the corner as well and Stinkfaces them both. You would think that the combined forces could have allowed them to escape but alas not so much. The referee, who somehow hasn’t called for a DQ, has to deal with Eddie throwing Chavo a chair. It is but a ruse though as Eddie uses another chair on Rikishi’s leg, setting up the El Paso Lasso for the tap.

Rating: C-. I could go for watching the Guerreros do their cheating every day. They have so much chemistry together and really do feel like they could beat anyone with these shenanigans. It helps that Eddie is doing some of the best work of his career right now and looking more and more awesome every single week. Rikishi was just fine here too as the one that gets to stand still while Eddie does his thing.

Torrie Wilson can’t believe Dawn Marie has challenged her to a lingerie contest. I can’t quite hear what she says next because the pop is far too strong. Torrie’s father shows up and she tries to hide her lingerie choices before getting him away.

Stephanie wants the tag division to be legitimate so she lectures Chris Benoit and Kurt Angle. Wouldn’t it make more sense to bring in regular teams to make the belts a bit more legit? I mean, I’m no one to question Stephanie but reforming the Dudleyz or something like that would have made more sense. Or not letting THE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS JUMP TO RAW IN THE FIRST PLACE. Angle mocks Benoit’s missing tooth and they get in an argument over who leaves first.

Rey Mysterio is ready for his tournament match with Edge tonight when Nidia comes in for a Spanish argument. Rey seems to insult her so Nidia storms off to yell at Jamie Noble. Jamie says don’t treat him like that because he has a tournament match of his own tonight. Coffee is tossed away and security breaks it up.

The Guerreros are fired up over their win when Benoit comes out of Stephanie’s office (Does that mean he won or lost the competition with Angle?) and looks rather serious. Eddie: “Did you just get in trouble with the principal man?” Benoit doesn’t want to be suspended for a year but Chavo chimes in with a rumor that Angle is taking a year off to train for the Olympics. Chris is suspicious when Angle comes out. His greetings to Eddie and Chavo respectively: “What up home slice?” and “Word up my Chicano friend.” The Guerreros leave and Angle things they were talking about him. Violence is threatened and Benoit smirks.

Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Billy Kidman/John Cena vs. Kurt Angle/Chris Benoit

The winners get the Guerreros next week. Kidman hurricanranas Benoit down to start and it’s off to Cena (in purple and orange, Phoenix Suns colors) for a hiptoss on Angle. That’s not cool with Kurt so he snaps off a belly to belly to send Kidman flying out to the floor. Benoit and Angle get annoyed at each other again (of course) so Chris rolls some German suplexes on Kidman.

We hit a kneeling half crab with Benoit cranking on it as only he can. Kidman does the tag that the referee doesn’t see spot so Angle can throw him down again. Angle is finally sent into the post and Benoit takes an enziguri, allowing the real hot tag off to Cena. Everything breaks down in a hurry and Benoit’s powerbomb is countered into an X-Factor to give Kidman a near fall. Angle is back in for an Angle Slam though but Cena saves the ankle lock. He can’t save the Crossface though and Kidman taps.

Rating: C. This got better at the end but was there any real question about who was going to win here? They kind of screwed themselves over with the “one year suspension” thing because no one is going to buy that happening. Angle and Benoit trying to one up each other is very entertaining though and that makes for some fun matches.

Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman arrive with a good looking woman. They want to have the path to the ring cleared because they have an announcement.

And now for the highlight of the show: a Desire video all about Matt Hardy with Matt narrating. I know he gets a lot of flack for all these reinventions but when they hit, they hit huge.

We recap the Undertaker vs. Matt brawl.

Here are Lesnar, Heyman and that woman for what I really hope isn’t the announcement I think it’s going to be. Heyman talks about Undertaker being in the back talking about the Cell, which Lesnar isn’t qualified to talk about. However, Tracy is qualified to talk about what kind of a man Undertaker is. This brings out a ticked off Undertaker so Heyman and Lesnar bail. Tracy stays though and calls him Mark because it’s serious you see.

They’ve been sleeping together for three months and she just found out he’s married. The big SARA tattoo on his throat wasn’t a hint that there was a woman in his life? She didn’t care that he was famous and promised to never take the relationship permanent. The fans chant some VERY unkind things about Tracy until Undertaker denies it. Tracy slaps him in the face and storms off.

Post break, Heyman and Lesnar are leaving when Stephanie pops up to put Lesnar in the tournament with Tajiri. It’s important to have the best teams, which is why the Dudley Boyz are still separated right? Heyman protests so Stephanie guarantees him that Undertaker is banned from ringside. If he interferes, he’s out of the title match.

Billy Gunn vs. Reverend D-Von

The Gunn is back and so is the generic rock music. D-Von, with Ron Simmons in his corner, hammers away to start but gets clotheslined for two. That’s enough for D-Von to take a breather on the floor and Simmons gets in a cheap shot to take over. Back in and we hit the chinlock as the announcers ignore the match to talk about anything else. Can you blame them in this case? A powerslam gets two but Billy grabs the One and Only for no cover. Simmons breaks up the Fameasser so Chuck superkicks him, allowing the Fameasser to connect for the pin a few seconds later.

Rating: D. Boring match here but that’s all you can expect here. I’m sure there’s a good reason to have D-Von lose before he and Simmons have their semifinal match next week. At least Bubba is still getting to team with Spike over on Raw and fill in a spot in a one off gimmick match. That’s also all we’ll see of Gunn until June of next year as he wrecked his shoulder a few days later at a house show.

Undertaker can’t get a word in with Sara and she hangs up on him. This is exactly what I want to see to build up the most violent match in the company.

Chavo is holding his head and screaming for Benoit. Chris comes up and Chavo says Angle jumped Eddie. Benoit goes off to find them and Chavo shoves him into a closet where violence can be heard. A smiling Eddie comes out holding a dented chair and saying Angle did it.

Torrie is ready for her lingerie contest and asks her dad to not watch (well duh). Dawn Marie comes up and gives Al a preview of her outfit, which he seems to approve of.

Lingerie contest, Torrie wins, Cole thinks this is WAY more impressive than it really is, Torrie won’t shake hands after winning.

Post break Al is waiting outside the women’s locker room when Dawn comes up to give him the Divas Undressed magazine with her hotel room key marking her pages.

Heyman is telling Brock what to watch for in the tag match when Lesnar asks for his phone. Brock calls Sara and asks if she’s ok before smiling and hanging up. Heyman looks somewhere between mortified and inspired.

We hear Tracy’s bad acting skills again.

Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Brock Lesnar/Tajiri vs. Rey Mysterio/Edge

The winners get D-Von and Simmons next week for reasons that make my head hurt. Edge and Lesnar start with the champ shoving him down with ease. The Canadian pops back up and gets in a takedown before mocking Lesnar’s pose. That just ticks Lesnar off and I don’t see this ending well. If nothing else, Brock being on the floor gives Cole a chance to praise Stephanie’s business sense.

Back in and the beating begins but Mysterio tags himself in and springboards into a crossbody on Lesnar. That gives us the staredown with Brock hitting something like a powerslam for two. Tajiri tags himself in for the first kick before grabbing a chinlock. That’s followed by the more successful Tarantula but Rey escapes and grabs a hurricanrana.

The hot tag brings in Edge and Lesnar has no issues watching his partner get beaten up. Edge makes the mistake of knocking Brock off the apron and here comes the champ. Brock actually gets dropped by a flying forearm and Tajiri kicks Lesnar by mistake. A double dropkick puts Lesnar on the floor and the 619 into the spear sends Edge and Rey on.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what you would expect from these four in this situation. I could certainly go for Tajiri vs. Rey and Edge vs. Lesnar doesn’t sound too bad either. I’m not sure I get the logic of giving the face team such an easy path to the finals but the tournament needs to be the best or something.

Lesnar cleans house until Undertaker makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There’s good stuff sprinkled through this show but it’s not enough to overcome the stupid Tracy story, the pretty lame tournament stuff and Billy Gunn vs. D-Von. Smackdown works because it has a bunch of action instead of the weak drama and bad storylines. Give us any two combinations of the really talented guys for twelve minutes or so and everything will be fine.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 6, 2017
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

So Fastlane was last night and I’m kind of at a loss for anything positive to say about it. Roman Reigns beat Braun Strowman clean, Charlotte’s pay per view streak was broken in a weird moment where Sasha Banks cheated to help Bayley and then Kevin Owens lost the Universal Title to Goldberg in 22 seconds. If that sounds bad, imagine Chicago getting to react to it. Let’s get to it.

We open with a quick recap of last night’s main event. How quick can a recap be when the match is 22 seconds long?

Here’s Chris Jericho to get us going, which is the absolute best thing they could do to keep the crowd from turning on the show. Tonight is the rebirth of Chris Jericho because last night at Fastlane he screwed Kevin Owens out of the Universal Title. A few weeks ago, Owens took a knife and he stuck it in man.

Jericho wants Owens out here right now so here’s Kevin. Owens starts to talk but Jericho immediately cuts him off and wants to know why he was stabbed in the back. Kevin says there was no stabbing in the back because they were never best friends. Remember who his best friend used to be? Sami Zayn, who Owens stabbed in the back as he would do over and over again.

Jericho is just a tool and Owens did whatever he could to keep the Universal Title. Chris was there to watch his back because he knew what to expect but he was also gullible. Then Jericho outlived his usefulness by accepting the match against Goldberg on Kevin’s behalf. Last night Goldberg would have been outsmarted but Jericho got the better of Kevin last night.

Jericho calls trusting Owens the worst thing he ever could have done but now he has friends around this arena. Chris: “I’ve got the friends of Jericho! CHEER ME ON MAN!” Jericho isn’t done with Owens though because last night was the beginning of a road that ends at Wrestlemania. The match is made but since the show is in a month, let’s have a fight right now. Owens comes down to the ring for the brawl until Samoa Joe comes in to jump Jericho. Sami Zayn runs out with a chair for the save and house is cleaned. I heartily approve of every single thing that happened here.

Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens

I had the tag match written up but I sit here surprised. Sami hammers away to start and sends him outside for a kick to the chest. One heck of a flip dive (over the referee) takes Owens out but he comes back in with the Pop Up Powerbomb for no cover. Instead he hits a brainbuster onto the knee, followed by a second Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin at 3:54.

Rating: C-. It was fun while it lasted but this was just a step above a squash. It’s not like Sami has anything to do right now but I could go for a match like this being a little longer than four minutes. Sami’s dive was cool but I’m not sure why this needed to be so short. At least Owens gets some heat back after last night.

Cruiserweight Title: Rich Swann vs. Neville

Neville is defending. After the handshake, Swann wastes no time in going after the champ and pounds him out to the floor. Neville is right back though and sends him head first into the LED apron for a thud. Back from a break with Swann getting out of a chinlock as the AUSTIN ARIES chants strike up. Swann sends him outside and hits a bit flip dive off the top (Aries: “Was that a swan dive?”) but gets crotched back inside.

The superplex knocks Swann silly but he’s able to roll outside before the Rings of Saturn can go on. Back from another break with Swann getting in a German suplex and kicking Neville in the head for a close two. Another kick to the head sets up the Phoenix Splash but Swann only hits mat, setting up the Rings of Saturn to retain the title at 13:33.

Rating: B-. The lack of drama and abundance of commercials hurt this a lot but Neville is just nailing it right now. He looks unbeatable, which should mean that it’s time for the Greatest Man that Ever Lived to get his shot. I’ve liked Neville more than almost anyone else in WWE as of late and I look forward to seeing him every week.

Post match Aries goes into the ring for an interview with Neville but the fans cut him off with the AUSTIN ARIES chants. Neville says he’s laid waste to pretender after pretender and there’s no one left on 205 Live to challenge him. Aries makes sure he understood that: there’s no one that can challenge Neville?

The fans chant for Aries and he actually acknowledges them for a change, which isn’t cool with the champ. Neville gets in his face so Aries takes off the sunglasses and Neville keeps at it until Aries has a question for him. Actually it’s more of a statement and that means a big left hand to Neville. A discus forearm puts Neville on the floor to a MASSIVE pop.

Enzo and Big Cass get in Cesaro and Sheamus’ face for some short form trash talk.

Here’s Goldberg and EGADS the booing starts when the music stops. Goldberg holds up the title and says it belongs to the people as much as it belongs to him. Goldberg says he has information he’s never mentioned before but the CM PUNK chants start up. He kind of rolls with them but here’s Paul Heyman instead. Heyman knows he’s not man enough to get in the ring with Goldberg but he knows someone who is.

Cue Brock Lesnar for the staredown with Heyman saying that no one is happier for Goldberg than Lesnar himself. Only one of them can walk out as the winner because the other will walk out of Wrestlemania as the loser. Lesnar extends his hand as Goldberg looks at Lesnar, meaning it’s an F5 for the new champ. This still flat out does not need the title involved.

Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore and Big Cass vs. Anderson and Gallows

Enzo and Cass are challenging after Amore’s foot was pushed off the ropes to end their title shot last night. Cass runs over Gallows and the champs are sent to the floor. They’re smart enough to move before Enzo can dive though and here come Sheamus and Cesaro. Back with Amore in trouble but grabbing a tornado DDT. A suicide dive takes Gallows out again but Enzo spills Cesaro’s coffee. That’s enough to draw Cesaro and Sheamus in for the DQ at 6:53.

Rating: D. I’m so over this feud and I have a bad feeling that we’re going to be getting a triple threat title match at Wrestlemania for reasons that still aren’t clear. I don’t know who would want to see that match, which is why we’re so likely to see it. If Amore and Cass win the belts there then it’s going to be worthy of a great pop but there’s nothing to look forward to on the way.

Cesaro and Sheamus clean house post match which might set up a triple threat.

Rick Rude Hall of Fame announcement.

Post break Foley breaks up Amore/Cass and Cesaro/Sheamus from fighting in the back. They’ll have a #1 contenders match next week. Everyone seems happy so HERE’S FREAKING STEPHANIE to tell Mick to go come to her office.

Ariya Daivari vs. Akira Tozawa

Daivari takes him down to start so Tozawa shouts a lot and sends Daivari to the floor for a suicide dive. Back in and the snap German suplex ends Daivari at 2:08.

Tozawa says he wants to fight Brian Kendrick but Brian comes out and says be careful what you wish for.

New Day vs. Shining Stars

Before the match, New day shows off their ice cream cart and say they can now host a lot of things, including a beating for the Shining Stars. A butterfly gutbuster puts Kofi down to start and Big E. is knocked off the apron. The Stars go after the ice cream cart but Big E. is there for the save. The Midnight Hour wraps up Primo at 1:18.

Women’s History Month video on Trish Stratus and Lita.

Foley is in the ring to introduce Bayley. The champ is glad to have retained the title but she doesn’t feel right about how she kept it last night. She had wanted Sasha Banks to stay in the back but something else happened instead. When she was a kid, her calendar began and ended with Wrestlemania and now she’s going to the show but she doesn’t feel right about it.

Foley asks who she’ll be defending the title against (Shouldn’t he be telling her?) but here’s Sasha to interrupt. She wants the shot and Bayley seems to agree but Foley asks for the people’s opinion. Cue Charlotte and Dana Brooke to say this was the plan all along. Whoever lost at Roadblock wasn’t supposed to get a second chance and now Banks is pulling this. Charlotte blames Foley and says she’s the victim because she was robbed.

Cue Stephanie to say she’s the boss (yes Stephanie you haven’t made that clear enough yet) and call out the fans for being losers like CM Punk. Stephanie makes Charlotte #1 contender but Mick says you can’t leave the Boss out. Stephanie: “Mick, who is the boss?” Mick suggests Charlotte vs. Banks for the #1 contendership next week but Stephanie has a better idea (well duh): Bayley vs. Sasha right now and if Sasha wins, the title match at Wrestlemania is a triple threat.

Sasha Banks vs. Bayley

Non-title. Banks takes her to the mat to start and gets two off a rollup. Bayley gets the same off an armdrag and they stare each other down a bit. Sasha hiptosses her into the corner as Charlotte keeps complaining about how she was cheated last night (completely true). A hard chop staggers Bayley and a wristdrag out of the corner sends her outside. They don’t seem to want to hut each other here. Back in and a hard clothesline drops Bayley as we take a break.

We come back with the slow pace continuing and a camera shot of the announcers’ desk instead of the ring. Bayley can’t get the suplex but here are Charlotte and Dana to ringside. Banks misses the middle rope knees in the corner, followed by Bayley missing a high crossbody. The Bank Statement goes on and Sasha kicks Charlotte off the apron as Bayley taps at 13:00.

Rating: D+. Hey we want some triple threats! I get why they flat out can’t leave Charlotte out of the match but what in the world is the point in booking Bayley like this? She became one of the biggest stars in NXT history by being an underdog so now she’s having her friends help her win title matches and losing in a match to set up a triple threat because Stephanie and Foley are still fighting. And people wonder why this show makes people’s heads shake.

Charlotte takes Sasha out post match.

Roman Reigns says if Braun Strowman wants to even the score, he’ll be in the middle of the ring at the end of the show.

Video on Seth Rollins rehabbing his knee.

HHH joins us via satellite to talk about how great WWE’s medical program is and hopes that Rollins will listen to the experts. He’s been called many things over the years but everyone knows he’s always been the man. Why Rollins can’t use his head and stay away isn’t clear but if HHH has to do something about it, so be it.

Emma is coming. Graves: “Not this again!”

Samoa Joe vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title with Owens and Zayn banned from ringside. Joe takes him into the corner to start and stomps away before a quick crossbody gives Chris two. The Walls are quickly countered so Jericho settles for an enziguri. A dropkick puts Joe on the floor and Jericho baseball slides to the floor….right into the Koquina Clutch. Joe grabs the hold on the floor and it’s a countout at 3:55.

Rating: D+. Again it was fun while it lasted but was this really the best idea? The champ just got choked completely out and lost the match because Joe was better. It’s a great way to push Joe but Jericho looked like he was in over his head here. Eh to be fair though it’s not like the US Title has meant anything lately anyway.

Joe goes after Jericho again and takes a Codebreaker. That helps the result a good bit.

Here’s Strowman to finish what he started last night. Roman’s music starts but is quickly replaced by a gong because here comes Undertaker. The fans are WAY into this staredown but Braun bails into the crowd as the fans cheer for Undertaker. As Undertaker goes to leave, cue Reigns for the real staredown. The fans aren’t quite as into this and boo Reigns out of the building as he says this isn’t about Undertaker. Reigns says it’s his yard now (that’s all this match needed to set it up) and that earns him a chokeslam. We get a shot of the Wrestlemania logo over Undertaker’s shoulder before he walks out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show started off white hot and then cooled WAY down. They were brilliant to start this off with Jericho and Owens because it’s the hottest feud in the company right now and the thing people want to see. The rest of the first hour was good stuff too with Neville vs. Aries as a highlight. After that it was mainly business as usual but it was nowhere near as bad as it usually gets. I had a good time with this one and you can really see how utterly worthless Fastlane was. That show was a mess and worthless while this one was energetic and built towards Wrestlemania. Raw wins, which you don’t say often.

Results

Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb

Neville b. Rich Swann – Rings of Saturn

Anderson and Gallows b. Enzo Amore/Big Cass via DQ when Cesaro interfered

New Day b. Shining Stars – Midnight Hour to Primo

Sasha Banks b. Bayley – Bank Statement

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: October 3, 2002
Location: CajunDome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

I don’t know what lit the fire underneath Smackdown as of late but they’ve been on fire. Last week was one of the best episodes of TV I’ve ever seen and while there’s a good chance things will go downhill tonight, at least things are on a roll coming in. We’ve got about three weeks before No Mercy and it should be time to announce a Smackdown match or two. Let’s get to it.

Stephanie McMahon does the seizure inducing intro to talk about tonight’s card, including Edge vs. Kurt Angle, Matt Hardy vs. Undertaker in a falls count anywhere match and the start of a tournament for the Smackdown Tag Team Titles with the finals at No Mercy. This is your first (of many) ways to put Stephanie on screen and remind us that she’s just so darn cool.

Smackdown Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Rikishi/Mark Henry vs. Eddie Guerrero/Chavo Guerrero

The cousins try to get in a sneak attack to start but the big guys throw Chavo onto Eddie. That goes nowhere though as it’s basically a high crossbody, meaning Eddie pops back up and hammers on Rikishi. Cole: “You’ve got to take your hat off to Smackdown GM Stephanie McMahon!”

Eddie comes in and walks into a Samoan drop, followed by a superkick to Chavo. It’s time to start in on Mark’s knee with both Guerreros taking a few shots, only to have Mark keep kicking them away. Rikishi comes in and is immediately forced out by the referee, allowing Chavo to hit Henry in the knee with a chair. Eddie slaps on a leglock for the tap out.

Rating: C-. You can see the greatness in Eddie and Chavo as a team and the monsters were a fine choice for some monsters they needed to cheat. This was a good way to get around one of the nothing teams and advance the talented guys, which is exactly how this should have gone. When you get the right opponents, there’s going to be a classic for the Guerreros somewhere in this tournament.

Torrie Wilson arrives….with her dad Al. Oh geez it’s this mess. They run into Billy and Chuck when Dawn Marie comes in and hits on Al.

Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar are watching a clip of Lesnar attacking Undertaker when Heyman says Stephanie has made a rematch at No Mercy. The thing is she won’t tell him the stipulation and Heyman is worried. Lesnar laughs it off when Matt Hardy comes in to say it won’t be falls count anywhere.

Matt Hardy vs. Undertaker

Falls count anywhere. Undertaker slugs him into the corner to start and takes it outside to throw Matt into various things. A low blow breaks up a chokeslam through the table but Undertaker shoves him into the barricade for a breather. More right hands send Matt through the crowd and Undertaker gets a soda thrown in his face. They head to the back with Matt getting in a cheap shot so Undertaker rams him into a wall. Matt runs off while shouting that they’ll meet again and here’s Lesnar to jump Undertaker. An F5 sends Undertaker onto what looks like popcorn (seriously) to give Matt the easy pin.

Rating: F. Unless I’m missing something, Undertaker took a total of some right hands, a low blow, forearms from Lesnar and an F5 onto a glorified stack of pillows. That’s enough for him to do a job for Matt Hardy but the fight he and Lesnar had wasn’t enough to do a job to Brock on pay per view? Horrible stuff here as Hardy got squashed until the stupid ending.

Post match Lesnar crushes Undertaker’s hand with a propane tank.

Survivor Series ad.

Undertaker’s hand is being iced and he walks away from an interview attempt. The trainer thinks the hand is broken.

Cruiserweight Title: Crash vs. Jamie Noble

Jamie is defending and they start with a fight over a wristlock. The announcers are of course more interested in talking about Undertaker’s hand injury, which isn’t all that surprising given how worthless the title has become in the last few months. Noble takes him into the corner before cranking on a camel clutch. Crash fights up with some basic stuff, including an O’Connor roll to knock Nidia off the apron. The Crash Landing (Styles Clash) is countered into a rollup and Noble grabs the rope to retain.

Rating: C-. Crash made this better with a nice comeback but unfortunately the fans really didn’t care. Like I said though, the division is just nothing at this point and there’s no reason to care about Jamie Noble vs. Crash in a four minute match serving as a backdrop for all the Undertaker vs. Lesnar talk. That switch from Raw really did wonders for Crash’s career though.

Kurt Angle brags about how awesome he is and thinks Chris Benoit will lose to Rey Mysterio tonight. Angle says he’s awesome when Edge comes in and makes bald jokes but at least ties it back to their hair vs. hair match. A sucker punch puts Edge down.

Edge vs. Kurt Angle

We get a replay of the sucker punch from five minutes ago during Kurt’s entrance. Angle takes him down by the arm to start and kicks Edge off the leg without much effort. Back up and Edge goes after an arm as well, this time with a hammerlock, both standing and laying down. See that’s versatility. Angle finally gets tired of the beating and hammers away in the corner, only to have Edge reverse into the same.

They head outside with Angle’s arm going into the post as Edge is in a lot more control than you would expect. Back in and Edge is thrown over the top for a big crash to the floor. A drop onto the barricade makes things even worse and an overhead belly to belly gives Kurt two. We hit a chinlock with a bodyscissors for a bit before Angle knees him in the banged up ribs.

Since Angle is smarter than the average wrestler, he grabs an abdominal stretch to keep Edge in trouble. Edge fights up and hits an overhead belly to belly (good one too) to set up some clotheslines. The half nelson faceplant gets two but the spear hits the referee. The Edgecution should get the finish but there’s no count. Therefore, the Angle Slam connects as well, only to have another referee come in for the two.

The ankle lock sends Edge bailing to the ropes and he goes up top, only to have Angle superplex him down. They interlock their legs into a small package though and it’s a double pin. Naturally the referees disagree (with Mike Chioda nailing Mike Sparks) to send us to a break and a restart. Cole: “Don’t adjust your sets! This match has been restarted!” Does Cole think that adjusting the sharpness is going to rewind a video or something? Angle misses a charge and flies out to the floor, leaving Edge to dive off the top for a big crash.

Back in and a missile dropkick gets two on Kurt as the crowd is losing their minds on these near falls. A very hard German suplex drops Edge and Angle rolls some more for good measure. Cue Chris Benoit for a distraction, allowing Edge to cradle Angle for two. That would have been the finish in today’s WWE. The ankle lock is easily broken up and Angle grabs a chair. Benoit offers a distraction though, causing the chair shot to hit the top rope and bounce back into Kurt’s head. The spear gives Edge the pin.

Rating: A-. This was one less referee fight and false finish away from being a classic. As it is, this was just another great match to be added to the recent string of them on this show. Edge is getting hotter and hotter every single week and thankfully seems to be getting somewhere as a result. I love it when you see someone work hard and get rewarded for it, which is far rarer than it should be.

Benoit thinks it’s hilarious.

Rey Mysterio video.

Post break Angle goes into the locker room to go after Benoit but Stephanie is RIGHT THERE to break it up and put them together as partners in the tournament. If they fight while they’re partners, they’re suspended without pay for a year. Angle sucker punches Benoit (that’s two tonight) but Stephanie SCREECHES at them to shake hands right now. Lesnar gives Heyman another pep talk when Matt Hardy interrupts. Since Undertaker is injured and Matt just beat him, he should probably be #1 contender. Makes sense actually. Matt leaves and Heyman whispers to Lesnar: “I’d be careful. He could kill you.” Laughter ensues.

Raw Roulette is coming. That has way less potential than they’re building it up to have here, though to be fair that’s kind of the point.

Smackdown Tag Team Title Tournament First Round: Billy and Chuck vs. Faarooq/Reverend D-Von

Billy asks Faarooq if he’s actually associating with D-Von and gets mic’d in the head for his efforts. Chuck gets jumped from behind but manages a butterfly suplex on D-Von. Faarooq beats him down again though until Chuck gets in a shot and makes the hot tag to Gunn. Everything breaks down and Faarooq gets in a spinebuster on Billy to give D-Von the upset pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here and that’s not really surprising. I’m not sure why you have Billy and Chuck lose here as I can’t imagine anyone is thinking much of D-Von and Faarooq. You’re trying to establish some new titles and it might help to have a multiple time Tag Team Championship combination in the later rounds.

Dawn shows Al her bikini.

It’s time for the bikini contest and let’s see how fast we can get this over with: Dawn looks great but Torrie looks better and has a sucker so she wins. Dawn offers a handshake and throws Torrie outside.

Stephanie gets to tell Heyman and Lesnar that Undertaker’s hand is broken. Undertaker is insisting to fight at No Mercy though and it’s going to be Hell in a Cell. That’s quite a speedy trip to the hospital (when you remember Undertaker refused treatment), x-ray, diagnosis, phone call to Stephanie and decision since Undertaker got hurt all of an hour and fifteen minutes ago. Heyman looks nervous but Brock looks eerily pleased.

Chris Benoit vs. Rey Mysterio

Benoit wastes no time and sends Mysterio into the corner, followed by what looks to be a Razor’s Edge attempt, only to have Rey reverse into a hurricanrana. Chris is sent outside for a big flip dive but comes right back with those hard suplexes that only he can throw. A cross arm choke keeps Rey down until a sunset flip gives him two. Back up and Benoit sends him into the corner over and over before grabbing a surfboard hold.

Rey fights up and slips out of a dragon suplex, only to get caught in a wicked wheelbarrow suplex instead. A dropkick gives Rey a breather and a springboard split legged moonsault gives him a near fall. The 619 is countered into a shoulder breaker though and the Swan Dive gives Benoit two more. Rey is quickly out of the Crossface and a springboard Fameasser sets up the 619. Cue Angle to snap Benoit’s throat across the top so Rey can grab a hurricanrana for the pin.

Rating: B. Were you really expecting this to be anything but solid? Smackdown has figured out the secret to an exciting in-ring product: stop trying to do anything too complicated and just let us have a fun match with some minor angle advancement. You can see these two plus Angle and someone else (probably Edge) in the tournament and that’s going to be awesome. Talented wrestlers can do something like this when given the chance and that’s what we got here.

Benoit Crossfaces Angle until security breaks it up to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. What does it say when this is one heck of a downgrade over the previous week? Those two matches more than made up for the horrible Undertaker stuff and the fact that it’s setting up a Cell match does make things a little easier to sit through. I’m having a blast watching these shows every week and it’s amazing that Raw is such a polar opposite from this. How can one company be so totally different? Either way, great stuff here, again.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Main Event
Date: February 23, 2017
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, R-Truth

I’m not even sure what to expect from this show anymore as it really could be anything from week to week. That’s not exactly a good thing either as the show can be an entertaining hour but at the same time it can be something so uninteresting that I don’t know how I survive every week. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Sin Cara vs. Bo Dallas

Bo takes him down to start and poses a lot, as you would expect him to do. A clothesline sets up a chinlock before Bo hammers away in the corner. That earns him a monkey flip as Cara starts his comeback, including a headstand into a headscissors out of the corner. Dallas gets sent outside for a running Swanton off the apron but he rolls through a high crossbody and grabs the tights for the pin on Cara at 4:53.

Rating: D. It’s going to be one of those weeks isn’t it? I really don’t know why Dallas isn’t on the main roster. You really can’t do something with that grin and the extra aggression that he’s been showing from time to time? It’s not like the main roster is flush with jobbers to the stars so throw him on there and let us have something fresh for a change.

We open with a long recap of the Festival of Friendship and Kevin Owens turning on Chris Jericho. Sweet popcorn baked into a pie that was an amazing segment.

Owens is sitting in the ring in the dark in a chair to get things going. When he was growing up, if anyone had told him he would be defending the World Title against Goldberg in the main event of a pay per view, he would have thought you were crazy. Of course he’d be in the main event of a pay per view, but against Goldberg? The Goldberg chants start up and Owens thinks that’s exactly what he wanted to hear.

That’s the chant that makes Goldberg think he’s invincible as they head into their match at Fastlane. At the pay per view, all Owens has to do is outlast and outsmart Goldberg because the longer a Goldberg match goes, the weaker and weaker he gets. Owens is the master of outsmarting opponents and no one knows how to play the game like him.

Goldberg can say Owens is next all he wants but as far as Owens is concerned, Goldberg is nothing. As for what happened last week with Jericho….Owens drops the mic and walks out. This is the Owens that we’ve been waiting to see on the main roster for a long time and that’s nothing but good as we head into the final stretch to Wrestlemania. Owens was great here and that’s awesome to see.

Our second Raw moment.

Cole is in the back for a sitdown interview with Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman. We get straight to the point with Goldberg but Heyman cuts Cole off and says Lesnar isn’t interested in questions like this one. Heyman says Lesnar isn’t interested in hearing about Goldberg winning the title so Lesnar scares Cole away and stares straight into the camera.

Paul talks about Owens attacking Jericho last week because Lesnar disagrees with Owens being the most violent champion in years. Lesnar isn’t interested in hearing about Owens but Heyman talks about Kevin’s greatness anyway. A lot of people want to see Owens pull it off but Lesnar disagrees because if Owens loses, it’s Goldberg vs. Lesnar for the title. That’s just one more thing for Lesnar to conquer at Wrestlemania and that’s what he wants to do.

Diamond Dallas Page Hall of Fame announcement.

TJ Perkins/Cedric Alexander vs. Noam Dar/Tony Nese

Nese throws TJ around to start so Perkins grabs a headlock instead. With that not working, a jumping spinning kick to the face puts Nese into the corner, followed by the Detonation Kick to send him outside. Back from a break with Perkins snapping Noam’s arm back but some heel double teaming takes over. Perkins fights out of a waistlock and hits a gutbuster to set up the hot tag to Cedric. Everything breaks down and a Lumbar Check ends Dar at 9:37.

Rating: C-. Still not good but at least there was some better action. You’re still only going to get so much out of these random cruiserweight tags though and that’s rather tiresome. I know Dar and Alexander were feuding a few weeks back but that hasn’t really been the case recently. I need more than just a random tag match to keep my attention and I’m not getting that here.

We’ll wrap it up here.

Braun Strowman vs. Big Show

And yes, this really is the main event. Show grabs a wristlock to start but Braun rolls around and nips up to escape. Now that’s going to get him noticed. Show shoves him down but gets punched in the jaw and dropped for his efforts. Strowman charges into a choke but easily reverses into a DDT for two. A clothesline drops Show for two and it’s all Strowman so far.

Show reverses a suplex into one of his own and grabs the chokeslam for two. The powerslam doesn’t work so Show puts him on top for the superplex. Strowman escapes that but dives into the KO Punch for two. Show loads up the Vader Bomb, only to have Strowman get up for the powerslam (doesn’t look great) for two of his own. Not that it matters as Braun hits another powerslam for the pin at 12:10.

Rating: C. Right here is a great example of a match that doesn’t need to be good to get the point across. Much like last week, this was about Strowman showing that he’s the new star instead of the old guard like Show or Mark Henry. It’s a very simple idea but they’re telling the right story, which is all you can ask for.

Post match Reigns comes out and gets in a few Superman Punches but Strowman hits the powerslam to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was one of the weeks where the original stuff wasn’t enough to carry the show, despite the fact that the Raw replays were much better. I still don’t get why they can’t throw in a bigger name for all of a match, even if they’re appearing on the main show that week. I know there’s a point to this show but they could at least try.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: September 26, 2002
Location: San Diego Sports Arena, San Diego, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Well Brock retained the title but they basically ruined the end of the pay per view with a double DQ finish. That almost guarantees that we’re setting up a rematch at No Mercy in a month because that’s how WWE main events work. Other than that we don’t have much of note on Smackdown because Unforgiven wasn’t a very important show. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Stephanie McMahon’s BRILLIANT (and highly illogical) plan to have Rikishi humiliate Eric Bischoff at the pay per view.

Opening sequence.

Rikishi vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

This is over Chavo hitting Rikishi with a camera last week. Chavo wisely gets him to give chase early on but Rikishi grabs him by the head and then throws Chavo into the corner by the throat. Something like a Scotty 2 Hotty style bulldog drops the big guy though and Rikishi is sent shoulder first into the post.

In the unfunny comedy portion of the match, Chavo loads up a Stinkface of his own but gets shoved away, meaning it’s time to back it up in the corner. The Rump Shaker is countered though and Chavo goes for the camera, which is superkicked back into his face. That’s enough for the Rump Shaker to connect and put Chavo away.

Rating: C. This was MUCH better than I was expecting and Chavo got to show off a bit. Rikishi is fine in a role like this where he beats up a midcarder and stays away from the bigger stories. It’s easy to like someone as fun as Rikishi but it’s a lot more difficult to take him seriously.

Rikishi dances post match.

It’s time for a bikini contest between Torrie Wilson and Nidia with Billy and Chuck as the judges. I guess it’s time to rehabilitate their masculinity or something. Nidia gets a 6 and a 9 (it’s funny you see) and Torrie gets a double 10. Billy and Chuck get in the ring and here come Tajiri and Jamie Noble, giving us an impromptu tag match.

Billy and Chuck vs. Tajiri/Jamie Noble

Chuck gets sent to the floor so it’s a series of kicks to put Billy down. Torrie is on the apron in a neutral corner for no apparent reason but it makes for some better scenery. The always great looking Tajiri superkick drops Billy again and Jamie starts in on the knee. Noble wraps it around the post as you can see the Cruiserweight Title on the floor. At least put it on the apron so it looks somewhat important.

Billy can’t even stand on the banged up leg so Jamie puts on a leglock as the world’s only WE WANT CHUCK chant starts up. A flapjack finally puts Jamie down though and there’s the hot tag to Chuck. House is cleaned and Billy manages to get up top for the Code Red (bit of a stretch there) for the pin on Tajiri (who was on Chuck’s shoulders for a LONG time before Billy was ready).

Rating: C+. That’s your standard tag team formula and it’s going to work no matter how many times we see it. They managed to get Chuck Palumbo a chant with the most basic tag team match you can put together. There’s a reason it’s a classic and it’s going to work as long as wrestling is around.

Post match the women get into it again and Torrie spanks Nidia.

Funaki interviews Brock Lesnar and asks him if he’s going to give Undertaker a rematch. Brock will give him an answer in the ring. Funaki is thrilled with getting a scoop and doesn’t realize he’s likely about to die.

Kurt Angle comes in to see Stephanie and they reminisce about the Stinkface. Angle would like a rematch against Chris Benoit but Stephanie has something else in mind. Rey Mysterio pops up and Angle asks if this is a violation of child labor laws. Stephanie’s big idea: a triple threat match between Mysterio, Angle and Benoit. Angle says he’ll get the 1-2-3 but Rey says it’s more like the 6-1-9, which the fans certainly approve of.

Here’s Funaki with the chair that was dented over Lesnar’s head at Unforgiven. After Funaki actually gets one heck of a pop (I’m as shocked as you are), Lesnar comes out and doesn’t want to hear about the Undertaker. Brock shoves him into the corner and for reasons of general stupidity, Funaki comes out swinging. A running right hand is easily countered into an STO, followed by a few throws and an F5 for good measure.

Dawn Marie offers Torrie some insincere praise for the win, though everyone knows Dawn would have beaten her with ease.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Edge

No DQ. Eddie starts hammering away until a monkey flip puts him down. The fans are all over Eddie as he easily breaks up a keylock. An elbow to the head drops Edge and Eddie hits some rather hard right hands. We hit a chinlock for a bit before Edge snaps off a powerslam, only to take too long getting to the top.

That means a huge superplex to give Eddie two and it’s time to head outside. Unfortunately it’s also time for a ladder and that means a ref bump as the ladder goes straight into his face (looked great actually). Back in and Eddie unloads on him with a chair but misses the frog splash to put both guys down.

We come back from a break with a new referee and the second only now being taken to the back. That’s really not a good response time. Edge gets in the half nelson faceplant but takes too much time going up, allowing Eddie to snap off a hurricanrana for a close two. A springboard hurricanrana is countered into a sitout powerbomb with Eddie’s head bouncing off the mat in a scary visual.

The ladder is brought in but it’s also knocked into Edge’s face to drop the Canadian again. That means Eddie needs a second ladder so he can sandwich Edge together, setting up the slingshot hilo. Guerrero gets one heck of a cheer from the crowd and it’s really hard to blame him with how hard they’re beating each other up out there.

Eddie goes up the ladder but Edge is there to slug it out…..so Eddie sunset powerbombs him off with one of the biggest bumps you’ll see on regular TV. Edge just got folded up and it looked awesome. That’s good for another respectful round of applause and somehow only two. In almost any other match, that should have been the fall.

Back up again and Edge backdrops him into the ladder in the corner before they climb the second ladder a second time. You know, because it ended so well earlier. This time Edge rams him face first into the top a few times and grabs an Edgecution off the ladder (looked a bit more like a superplex for the sake of clearing the ladder but the landing still looked great) for the pin and one last big reaction from the crowd.

Rating: A. Sometimes you need a great story with all kinds of intricacies and plot details. Sometimes you need a big climax to a major story. Then sometimes you need two incredibly talented wrestlers doing crazy things to each other involving a ladder. This was spectacular with both guys absolutely destroying each other with one more big spot after another. Nothing was topping that sunset powerbomb though and I think everyone knew it. Edge winning the match (and in theory the feud) is the right call and Eddie didn’t lose a thing here. Aside from the match of course. This is on multiple DVDs and it’s easy to see why.

A bloody Eddie gets the big respectful ovation, which he more than earned.

Marc Lloyd comes up to ask Benoit about the main event. Benoit: “YOU SUCK!” That got a good laugh. Anyway Benoit is ready.

Matt Hardy talks about running Hurricane off and suggests he’ll do the same thing to Undertaker tonight. Shannon Moore isn’t convinced and thinks it might have had something to do with Brock. Hardy pshaw’s him and leaves with Lesnar looking on. Good thing he was watching the show on a monitor and knew where Matt’s locker room was in relation to his.

Wrestlemania XIX press conference video. It’s very, very odd to see Undertaker in a collared shirt and pants.

Undertaker vs. Matt Hardy

I always liked the version of Undertaker’s song with lyrics. Matt’s handshake doesn’t go how he’d hope it would and the beating is on early. Hardy gets up an elbow in the corner though and starts in on the knee but the Twist of Fate is countered into a chokeslam. The Last Ride finishes Matt in less than two minutes.

Post match Lesnar runs out and busts Undertaker open again with a belt shot. During the break, Undertaker couldn’t stand up and EGADS he’s covered in blood. That’s one heck of a blade job for a TV show.

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Before the match, Angle accuses Rey’s fans of being illegal immigrants. The real threat in this match isn’t the toothless weirdo or the lost member of Menudo because it’s your Olympic hero. Rey takes over to start and hits the sitout bulldog on Benoit while kicking Angle in the face at the same time.

That earns Rey a trip out to the floor so Angle and Benoit can hit the match for their usual fast paced sequence. Kurt can’t get the ankle but settles for a two count with his feet on the ropes. Rey comes back in and avoids a charge to send Kurt shoulder first into the post. Not that it matters as Benoit is right there for a German suplex.

Chris throws Rey to the floor but gets chopped n the corner by a fresh Angle. We hit the rolling German suplexes and an Angle Slam on Benoit but Rey dropkicks Kurt for two. Benoit is sent outside this time and Rey scores with a dive, only to have Angle send him into the barricade.

Back in and Benoit gets his ankle locked until he grabs the rope, setting up a double 619. Angle blocks the West Coast Pop but gets rolled up for two more. Now it’s Kurt getting caught in the Crossface but Rey breaks it up by Dropping the Time for a VERY close two on Benoit. Angle gets suplexed to the floor and Benoit throws Rey over his head and onto the ropes, only to have Rey springboard into the West Coast Pop for the pin to blow the roof off the place.

Rating: A-. I’m exhausted after watching that. I didn’t skip more than a few moves here and there and all three guys came off looking outstanding. It’s a great example of just letting people do crazy sequences and look awesome all over the place. I’m going to need a little time to get over the idea that Mysterio won in his hometown. When was that concept banned? Anyway, check this one out after you see Eddie vs. Edge.

Overall Rating: A+. That’s probably the best Smackdown of all time and I’d be surprised if anything ever topped it. The worst match of the night was either Undertaker destroying Matt Hardy or a surprisingly good Rikishi vs. Chavo match. Even if you’re not impressed with that one, it didn’t even break five minutes. Throw in two classics and Torrie in a rather nice looking swimsuit and I don’t know what else you could ask for. Check this show out and have a great time with it because it might be the best Smackdown I’ve ever seen.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 20, 2017
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s a big show this week with a ton of things to get to. First of all, Brock Lesnar is scheduled to be in the house and that’s huge in general. Second, Bayley has been told to either give her title back to Charlotte or else, which could mean multiple things. Oh and Rock might be in town. Let’s get to it.

In Memory of George Steele. Not Ivan Koloff for some reason.

We open with a long recap of the Festival of Friendship and Kevin Owens turning on Chris Jericho. Sweet popcorn baked into a pie that was an amazing segment.

Owens is sitting in the ring in the dark in a chair to get things going. When he was growing up, if anyone had told him he would be defending the World Title against Goldberg in the main event of a pay per view, he would have thought you were crazy. Of course he’d be in the main event of a pay per view, but against Goldberg? The Goldberg chants start up and Owens thinks that’s exactly what he wanted to hear.

That’s the chant that makes Goldberg think he’s invincible as they head into their match at Fastlane. At the pay per view, all Owens has to do is outlast and outsmart Goldberg because the longer a Goldberg match goes, the weaker and weaker he gets. Owens is the master of outsmarting opponents and no one knows how to play the game like him.

Goldberg can say Owens is next all he wants but as far as Owens is concerned, Goldberg is nothing. As for what happened last week with Jericho….Owens drops the mic and walks out. This is the Owens that we’ve been waiting to see on the main roster for a long time and that’s nothing but good as we head into the final stretch to Wrestlemania. Owens was great here and that’s awesome to see.

Cesaro/Sheamus vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass

The winners get a title shot at Fastlane. Cass slugs it out with Cesaro to start before it’s off to Enzo, who is launched at Sheamus in the corner. Back from an early break with Enzo in trouble but backdropping Cesaro out to the floor. Sheamus gives chase though and Cesaro just blasts Amore with an uppercut to break up the hot tag attempt (Cue crowd reaction shot!). Cass comes in a few seconds later and everything breaks down. The corkscrew uppercut drops Cass but Enzo breaks up the swing. The East River Crossing ends Cesaro at 9:17.

Rating: C-. Can we please wrap up the Cesaro and Sheamus experiment already? They weren’t an interesting team in the first place and for some reason we’re still watching them do their thing. Then again, the tag division is pretty much four teams (if you count New Day) so it’s not like there’s any better option.

Post match Enzo runs his mouth and gets Brogue Kicked. That doesn’t feel exactly like a heel turn.

Owens is leaving when Mick Foley comes in to say he has a match with Sami Zayn tonight. Kevin chuckles and says he thought Foley liked Sami.

Video on Braun Strowman.

Video on Bayley winning the Women’s Title and fulfilling her lifelong dream. This sounds like the setup for a cruiserweight match.

Roman Reigns interrupts Foley and wants to fight Strowman tonight. Foley says that can’t happen but here are Anderson and Gallows to interrupt. They want to fight Reigns again tonight and Foley agrees if Roman can find a partner.

Brian Kendrick vs. Akira Tozawa

I would have expected a bit longer build to this one. Tozawa won’t shake hands so Kendrick hits him before the bell, including sending him neck/ear first into the turnbuckle hook. The Captain’s Hook knocks Tozawa out and there’s no match.

In the back, Kendrick says he won’t be disrespected like that.

Roman Reigns/??? vs. Anderson and Gallows

Non-title and Reigns’ partner is……not here as this is just going to be a handicap match. Anderson starts for the team but Roman drops them both to control early on. Gallows kicks him in the face though and it’s already off to the chinlock. The Boot of Doom is broken up and it turns into a double beating on the floor. A chair is brought in but Reigns takes it away and beats the champs down for the DQ at 3:57.

Rating: D+. Another short match that makes me wonder what the point is in having the Tag Team Champions get treated like this. Is there NO ONE ELSE that can do the mini feud with Reigns? Like, no two big guys you could throw out there? It’s almost like having the divisions this divided has ruined a lot of things and gives us moments like this.

Post match Reigns Superman Punches Gallows and spears Anderson out of the air, sending the champs crawling away.

Video on New Day being announced as the hosts of Wrestlemania.

New Day vs. Rusev/Jinder Mahal

Reigns couldn’t have beaten up Rusev and Mahal? Before the match, New Day says they’re working on a bunch of things right now, including being the hosts of Wrestlemania and trying to become the voices of the hyenas in the new Lion King movie (Kofi: “That’s not a joke.”).

On top of that, they’ve got the ice cream machine plans back and THEY’VE DIGITIZED THEM! Lana holds up a tablet and says she has the plans….which seem to be authentic. Apparently they include a flux capacitor, three unicorn hairs and New Day starts panicking. Woods: “HOW DID SHE GET THE PLANS?” Big E.: “You know she’s Russian right?”

The match is joined in progress with Rusev grabbing a bearhug on Kofi. It’s quickly off to Jinder, who can’t do a thing due to high levels of being Jinder Mahal. Big E. comes in and cleans house, including putting Rusev on the floor for a big dive. This lets Woods take the tablet back and completely destroy it for a big pop. The Midnight Hour puts Jinder away at 3:42.

Rating: D+. What in the world happened to Rusev? Like really, the guy should have been a big deal or at least feuded with Big Cass but now he’s jobbing in a nothing tag team? This really is a waste of someone who could have been something special and of course he still could be fine, but at the moment it’s a big waste of time. New Day is fine in this role as it’s not like they have anything else to do right now so let them have fun at Wrestlemania.

Video on George Steele.

Austin Aries is in the ring for the contract signing between Neville and Jack Gallagher. Since Gallagher is present, there are already cookies and tea prepared. Gallagher quickly signs before Neville can even come out. Neville does the same and immediately goes to leave, only to be stopped by Gallagher.

Neville mocks all of the British stereotypes and calls Gallagher a caricature. The real streets of England look like Neville but Gallagher is what the WWE Universe wanted Neville to be. Gallagher assures him that he is NOT a joke because this is the real thing. The table, including the tea is turned over and the fight is on with the headbutt sending Neville outside. Gallagher is one of my favorites at the moment but if they don’t do Neville vs. Aries for the title at Wrestlemania, they’ve lost their minds.

Nia Jax b. Sara Pierce

Splash and Samoan drop finish Pierce at 34 seconds.

Post match Nia says she’s putting Bayley and the title on notice.

Black History Month video on Barack Obama.

Here’s Bayley for her first appearance as Women’s Champion. She grew up here in California and had a dream of being a champion and getting to point at a Wrestlemania sign. When she was a kid, her dad brought her to the events and bought her all the shirts and toys. Last week, the first thing she did was call her dad and it’s a call she’ll never forget. Bayley’s dad is here tonight and the fans are making her look cool in front of her dad.

Cue Stephanie McMahon to ask if Bayley’s dream included everyone wondering if she could have done it without Sasha Banks. Stephanie’s daughters look up to her and she wants to know if Bayley is going to throw everything away for the sake of a championship that she didn’t earn. Bayley is about to hand it over when Sasha Banks comes out to say don’t do it. She thinks about it but says no way is she handing the title over. Bayley won the title because of the WWE Universe. The title belongs to all of them and she’ll defend it any time any place.

Cue Charlotte to say she’s cashing in her rematch at Fastlane. Sasha cuts her off and says Bayley will keep the title at the pay per view. As for tonight though, Sasha’s knee is feeling fine so let’s have a trip down memory lane. Stephanie makes the match right now because of course she gets to have the last word.

Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte

Bayley is on commentary. Joined in progress again with Sasha grabbing a headscissors but getting her face driven into the match. Charlotte does the Figure Four faceplants and grabs a necklock. Sasha is sent outside and we take a break. Back with Charlotte grabbing a dragon sleeper. Sasha fights out and makes her comeback, including a dropkick in the corner. Cue Dana Brooke for a distraction but Bayley cuts her off, allowing the Banks Statement to make Charlotte tap at 10:03.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to go anywhere with the long break in the middle but you can pretty much pencil in the four way at Wrestlemania from here. Sasha is going to make a great heel when she turns, even if you can see it coming a mile away. Oh and can we please drop the “renewal of a rivalry” when they last fought about two months ago? That’s rather pitiful.

Diamond Dallas Page Hall of Fame video. This is LONG overdue.

Sami Zayn knew Owens would do this kind of thing and he told us all it would happen. He sees a lot of similarities between Owens and Samoa Joe (insert your own Scott Steiner “HE’S FAT” joke here), including both of them doing all kinds of horrible things for the sake of some demented loyalty to someone else. Tonight, Sami is kicking Owens’ teeth down his throat.

Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn

Non-title. Before the match, cue Samoa Joe to massacre Sam. For some reason he agrees to the match anyway and it’s a Cannonball to crush Zayn even worse. The referee pulls him off so it’s a second Cannonball and the Pop Up Powerbomb to give Owens the pin at 1:11.

At 10:48pm, this show is dedicated to the memory of Ivan Koloff.

The bosses are in the back and Stephanie ribs on Foley for not coming out there during either the women’s segment or Samoa Joe beating Sami down. Foley FINALLY stands up for himself and blames Stephanie for Seth Rollins being injured. He was telling HHH and Stephanie how great Samoa Joe was twelve years ago and yells about how he’s not letting Stephanie’s greed get in the way of this show. Stephanie threatens him with an “accident” and Foley leaves.

Cole is in the back for a sitdown interview with Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman. We get straight to the point with Goldberg but Heyman cuts Cole off and says Lesnar isn’t interested in questions like this one. Heyman says Lesnar isn’t interested in hearing about Goldberg winning the title so Lesnar scares Cole away and stares straight into the camera.

Paul talks about Owens attacking Jericho last week because Lesnar disagrees with Owens being the most violent champion in years. Lesnar isn’t interested in hearing about Owens but Heyman talks about Kevin’s greatness anyway. A lot of people want to see Owens pull it off but Lesnar disagrees because if Owens loses, it’s Goldberg vs. Lesnar for the title. That’s just one more thing for Lesnar to conquer at Wrestlemania and that’s what he wants to do.

The ring is reenforced for the main event.

Braun Strowman vs. Big Show

And yes, this really is the main event. Show grabs a wristlock to start but Braun rolls around and nips up to escape. Now that’s going to get him noticed. Show shoves him down but gets punched in the jaw and dropped for his efforts. Strowman charges into a choke but easily reverses into a DDT for two. A clothesline drops Show for two and it’s all Strowman so far.

Show reverses a suplex into one of his own and grabs the chokeslam for two. The powerslam doesn’t work so Show puts him on top for the superplex. Strowman escapes that but dives into the KO Punch for two. Show loads up the Vader Bomb, only to have Strowman get up for the powerslam (doesn’t look great) for two of his own. Not that it matters as Braun hits another powerslam for the pin at 12:10.

Rating: C. Right here is a great example of a match that doesn’t need to be good to get the point across. Much like last week, this was about Strowman showing that he’s the new star instead of the old guard like Show or Mark Henry. It’s a very simple idea but they’re telling the right story, which is all you can ask for.

Post match Reigns comes out and gets in a few Superman Punches but Strowman hits the powerslam to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was an odd show as they advanced a lot of stories and set up a bunch of stuff for Fastlane but there’s nothing going on here that is worth going out of your way to see. Above all else though they’ve hit the switch and it’s clearly time to get ready for Wrestlemania. They’re taking things more seriously and you can see where a lot of the stories are going. I can’t believe I’m saying it but for once, I actually care about the Raw stories more than Smackdown. The show has been good lately and it’s at the perfect time.

Results

Enzo Amore/Big Cass b. Cesaro/Sheamus – East River Crossing to Cesaro

Anderson and Gallows b. Roman Reigns via DQ when Reigns used a chair

New Day b. Rusev/Jinder Mahal – Midnight Hour to Mahal

Nia Jax b. Sara Pierce – Samoan drop

Sasha Banks b. Charlotte – Bank Statement

Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Pop Up Powerbomb

Braun Strowman b. Big Show – Powerslam

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Unforgiven 2002
Date: September 22, 2002
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jim Ross, Tazz, Jerry Lawler

This isn’t exactly the most thrilling show in the world as the main events are Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar for the Smackdown World Title, HHH vs. Rob Van Dam for the Raw World Title and Billy and Chuck vs. 3 Minute Warning in the battle of the general managers. Yeah it’s not a good sign that we’re already doing interpromotional matches this soon on nothing pay per views. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at how we have TWO World Title matches tonight and calls the World Heavyweight Title (which it again tries to call the same thing as the WCW World Title) a “symbol of defiance”. So aside from the fact that IT’S NOT THE WCW TITLE, we’re supposed to buy that it’s defiant as it’s held by the most old school guy on the roster? To be fair, the sleeper is indeed pretty defiant.

If nothing else we get to hear Adrenaline all night long. Maybe this show won’t be that bad.

Un-Americans vs. Goldust/Bubba Ray Dudley/Kane/Booker T.

JR calls them the Unforgivens, which is a better sounding name for a stable (not this stable but a stable) actually. Goldust clotheslines Storm and Christian to start and it’s off to Bubba for the Flip Flop and Fly (Bubba with each pelvic thrust: “U! S! A!”) Bubba’s flapjack gets two as the fans are all over Regal, who I guess is officially a member of the team.

It’s off to Booker vs. Regal with the former playing D-Von on What’s Up (not touching that one), meaning it’s table time. The referee is actually smart enough to cut off the table, allowing it to be dropkicked into Booker’s face. That means we’re stuck with the WE WANT TABLES chant as Regal forearms Booker in the face a few times.

Christian comes in and eats a spinebuster, allowing the hot tag to Kane. Everything breaks down as house is cleaned, leaving Test to miss the pumphandle slam. Booker gets in the Spinarooni but gets decked by Christian. We hit the parade of secondary finishers until Kane chokeslams Storm for the pin.

Rating: C. Not a great match but it was a perfect choice for the opener. The whole “let’s fight for AMERICA” is always going to work and the flag being waved post match (you know it’s going to be) is all that needs to happen here. It’s a good example of something simple that did exactly what it was supposed to and that’s perfectly fine.

The flag is indeed waved.

Noted tag team specialist Stephanie McMahon gives Billy and Chuck a pep talk. Stephanie: “This is about pride. This is about respect. This is about…” Billy: “Making sure you don’t have to French kiss a lesbian tonight?” It’s a funny line so Stephanie cuts the laughter because THIS IS SERIOUS.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Ric Flair

Jericho is defending after losing to Flair last month and wanting to get some revenge. Flair is in black trunks and purple boots tonight for a really odd combination. Some chops look to set up the Figure Four in the first minute of the match so Jericho kicks him outside without too much effort.

Jericho’s missile dropkick gets two and it’s off to the abdominal stretch. That’s enough for Flair to start his comeback (rather soon for that) with chops and a whip into the post. The bulldog takes Flair back down but Jericho tweaks his knee on the Lionsault. Flair ACTUALLY BACKS OFF from the injury and Jericho goldbricks his way into the Walls to retain the title.

Rating: C-. Ok where’s the real ending for this one? I’m not a huge Flair fan but there is no way he’s going to do something like this. The idea is that Flair is losing his touch but I have a major issue believing that Flair would EVER fall for something like this. On top of that the match was barely six minutes long on a pay per view. What else could they have more important than a title match?

Eric Bischoff gives 3 Minute Warning the same speech. Ah yes: the build to the Eric vs. Stephanie feud would indeed be more important than a title match. Bischoff has brought in Rico to manage the team tonight.

Edge vs. Eddie Guerrero

Eddie is jealous of Edge being a pretty boy. Edge is all fired up to start so Eddie gets him into a chase around the ring. Back in and Edge takes over in the corner until a tornado DDT puts him right back down. The announcers bring up the concussion from Thursday so it makes sense to go after Edge’s head. At least he’s not likely to no sell a head injury on his finisher.

Eddie wraps his legs around Edge’s shoulders (picture a victory roll position but with Edge on his back) and cranks on the head for a pretty unique looking hold. We hit the more traditional front facelock for a bit until Edge gets in a hard right hand to put both guys down. They slug it out from their knees with the Canadian getting the better of it and the faceplant connecting for two.

Eddie’s hurricanrana is countered into a sitout powerbomb for an even closer near fall. The Edgecution is only broken up with a foot on the bottom rope and Edge is getting frustrated. That means a dropkick to give Eddie an opening and he takes a buckle pad off. Edge goes up top but gets knocked into the steel, setting up a sunset bomb to give Guerrero the pin.

Rating: B+. Edge is looking more and more comfortable in the ring every single time and that’s quite the thing to see. He’s turned into a near main eventer in front of our eyes and Eddie Guerrero is the perfect choice to make that work. This was the best thing on the show so far and I can’t imagine much giving it a run for its money.

HHH goes in to see Rob Van Dam and rips on him for not having enough heart. Flair is sitting next to them and HHH says Ric used to have the heart that he’s talking about. Van Dam would rather hang with Flair than HHH and that’s about it.

Long recap of 3 Minute Warning vs. Billy and Chuck because we haven’t seen the wedding video in days at this point. We see the women’s protest too as we need to make it clear that Stephanie outsmarted Bischoff and got the last laugh.

3 Minute Warning vs. Billy and Chuck

Rico gets in a kick to Chuck’s head to start so the Samoans can take over, leaving Cole to explain the stipulations AGAIN because it’s the most brilliant idea ever and you’re too stupid to get it through your head. Chuck can’t get out of the corner as Jamal kicks him in the face for two.

A chinlock keeps Chuck in trouble as this isn’t exactly lighting the world on fire so far. The very slow and rather uninteresting beating continues because no one in this match knows how to properly take over. Rosey misses a moonsault and the hot tag brings in Billy to clean house.

Naturally he’s dumb enough to ram the Samoans’ heads together and so much for Billy and Chuck being on offense. Chuck breaks up Jamal’s top rope splash and gets in a superkick, only to take one from Jamal. Billy makes the mistake of going after Rico and a double Samoan drop finishes him off, turning 3 Minute Warning into huge faces as the HLA chants begin.

Rating: D. And that’s it for the match, until Stephanie and Eric get to come out and do the real stuff later. The problem here is there’s no particular reason for these guys to hate each other as it’s all about the bosses. Bischoff pays the Samoans and Billy and Chuck are now on Stephanie’s side because they’re all from Smackdown. That’s far from enough of a reason to care but WWE doesn’t get that because apparently Eric and Stephanie are just such fascinating characters.

Bischoff has his lesbians ready to go

We recap HHH vs. Van Dam. HHH was handed the Raw World Title and Van Dam won a four way to get the shot. Since the match was set, HHH has cost Van Dam the Intercontinental Title which should mean a new champion but of course that’s just not going to happen.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is challenging. They start slowly and there’s a good chance this is going to be a long match. Rob slips away from a hammerlock and slaps HHH in the face to get the frustration going. We hit the headlock on the mat to keep HHH in trouble so he bails outside. Back in and Rob takes some water to mock the spitting pose. With the mat soaked, let’s go back to that headlock.

They trade some rollups into a bridging backslide spot but instead of doing that, let’s hit the headlock AGAIN. Rob finally hits a kick to put HHH on the floor and that means a big flip dive but the champ gets out of the way. Back in and a catapult sends Van Dam’s throat into the bottom rope, setting up a neckbreaker for two. The jumping knee gets the same and it’s time for that freaking sleeper.

Rob escapes (because it’s just a sleeper) and comes back with his usual, including a slingshot dive to graze HHH. Some kicks set up the ref bump and the Pedigree is countered into a slingshot. Rob scores with the Five Star but there’s no ref, allowing HHH to get the sledgehammer. Van Dam kicks it into his face, drawing out Flair for the SHOCKING heel turn, including a sledgehammer shot to keep the title on HHH.

Rating: D+. This was your standard HHH match of the time: long, dull and with a pretty obvious ending. I mean, I know all of the signs pointed to Van Dam winning the title here but that might mean HHH isn’t the most important wrestler in the world. You know, with his manly sleeper and all that. The Flair stuff was obvious too as you don’t have someone come out for anything but a heel turn. Nothing to see here but that’s what you have to expect in this era.

D’Lo Brown and Kidman talk about what just happened when an actor from the Young and the Restless comes up for a completely worthless cameo. Dawn Marie comes up to take him away. It really is as random as it sounds.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Molly Holly

Molly is defending and they trade wristlocks to start. Trish stops a charge in the corner as Lawler wants to take Molly’s virginity. They head outside for nothing interesting and it’s time for some choking back inside. As expected, Lawler moves right back to HLA because he hasn’t talked about it in all of five minutes. Trish gets in her first major offense with the bulldog followed by the Chuck Kick for two. Molly comes right back by putting Trish in the Tree of Woe for a handspring crash, only to get caught in another bulldog to give Trish the title in a very sudden ending.

Rating: D. What in the world was the point of this aside from filling in some time? It was a short match and didn’t go anywhere because the Women’s Title hasn’t meant anything in a LONG time. Trish was definitely one of the best in the division at this point but when you have Torrie and Nidia getting so much TV time, this doesn’t exactly mean anything.

The lesbians celebrate with 3 Minute Warning and Rico. Bischoff will pay for their night out. Why would the LESBIANS be interested in this? Actually never mind as Eric holds two of them back for later.

We recap Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle which is basically an argument over who is the better submission wrestler. Does Benoit vs. Angle need a story?

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

It’s an intense lockup to start with both guys falling out to the floor. Back in and they hit the mat for some technical stuff that no pairing could do better. With that going nowhere, it’s off to a long pinfall reversal sequence and you can tell the fans are respectfully silent instead of bored silent.

Angle slips out of a Crossface and bails to the floor as the fans give them a round of applause. Well deserved indeed. It’s off to a waitlock on Benoit for a bit before he sends Angle shoulder first into the post twice in a row. That’s enough defense for Kurt so he pops him over with a belly to belly.

Kurt can’t follow up though and it’s time to roll some German suplexes, only to have Angle reverse into a series of his own. Benoit starts snapping off even more of his own and Angle reverses AGAIN into his second series. Chris slips out of the Angle Slam and gets in one more with Angle getting flipped over onto his face.

Angle doesn’t stay down long though as he pops to his feet and runs the ropes for the super belly to belly. The ankle lock is reversed into a tombstone shoulder breaker of all things and Benoit hits the Swan Dive for a delayed two. The Crossface goes on but Kurt grabs the ankle lock while still in the hold for the break. How smart is this guy?

Angle gets the regular ankle lock before switching over to a Crossface on Benoit. Ever the villain, Kurt puts the rope away with his boot and gets yelled at by the referee, allowing Benoit to break the hold. One more rollup with Benoit’s feet going on the ropes for the surprise pin.

Rating: A-. Awesome stuff here and a nice callback to Wrestlemania XVII with Angle using the tights to pin Benoit after a submission battle. Benoit cheating to win makes sense as he’s doing the same thing Angle was doing earlier so it’s not exactly the dirtiest move in the world. It’s not like these two having a great match is any surprise but it’s one of their better efforts.

Lesnar isn’t worried about Undertaker.

It’s HLA time with Bischoff bringing out the lesbians. He’s scoured the country to find the best choice and introduces the ladies as Peaches and Cream. The girls give us a preview but Bischoff cuts them off before they can kiss. Bischoff brings Stephanie out and Lawler of course points out how hot she is (to be fair, he’s not wrong).

The girls take their tops off and remove Stephanie’s jacket for her as Lawler is on the verge of losing it. They rub Stephanie’s back but Eric has had it with the foreplay and tells them to get this going. Actually never mind as Bischoff has changed his mind and sends the lesbians away. He’s found a special lesbian for Stephanie and it’s……Rikishi in drag, which Bischoff somehow doesn’t see.

Bischoff calls “her” Hildegard and says she’s done prison time. Stephanie gets into the kissing and of course it’s Rikishi, which is actually treated as a surprise. A superkick puts Eric into the corner and for some reason Rikishi is wearing a bra. Bischoff gets the Stinkface as I try to figure something out: in theory, Stephanie put Rikishi up to this (or Rikishi is a cross dresser) so how complicated was this plan (and why were the original lesbians there in the first place other than tormenting the crowd) and how blind is Bischoff?

Like, did Stephanie figure out that Bischoff had this whole thing set up and then get Rikishi to do this as a backup plan? And Bischoff just saw the massive Samoan “woman” and had NO QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS??? Anyway Rikishi and Stephanie dance as Cole says “Stephanie rocks!” and Tazz says this is the funniest thing he’s ever seen.

The other major problem here: even though Stephanie’s team lost, she gets her revenge in all of an hour and a half. This is after she had the wedding go bad and got revenge for that four days later on the next show. If WWE wants her to be this major hero who stands up for the people, it might help if she was in distress for more than a week at one point or another. She’s always got the answer to everything, making it feel more like a sitcom than a show I’m supposed to believe is real.

We recap Undertaker vs. Lesnar with the music video treatment. Basically Undertaker has been around forever but has never faced anything like this. Lesnar is undefeated but never gotten beaten up before.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker

Lesnar is defending. We start with the big power lockup with Undertaker shoving Lesnar all the way out to the floor. It happens again so Lesnar kicks the steps while Heyman does some coaching. Back in and Brock starts kicking him into the corner, only to get caught with Old School.

Heyman gets kicked off the apron but the distraction lets Lesnar drive Undertaker into the corner to take over. A hard powerslam stays on Undertaker’s ribs and it’s off to a waistlock to keep up the focused attack. Undertaker sends him outside but Heyman is right there with the distraction so Lesnar can get in a belt shot to take over again, drawing some blood in the process. Back in and Undertaker boots him in the face twice in a row for two straight near falls.

We get a ref bump and OF COURSE Undertaker hits the chokeslam a second later for no count. Cue Matt Hardy to take a quick Last Ride but Brock scores with the spinebuster for two. The ref gets bumped a second time (now that’s just excessive) so Heyman throws in a chair which is kicked straight into Lesnar’s face. Two big chair shots to the head put Lesnar on the floor as Brock is busted too. Back in and both finishers are countered so they brawl into the corner, giving us a third ref bump (same ref too) for the REALLY lame double DQ.

Rating: D. There was a good power brawl buried underneath the ref bumps, the chair and the pretty worthless Matt Hardy cameo. Then there’s the ending, which doesn’t do anyone any favors and is clearly only there because Undertaker didn’t want to do the job. Just too much stuff messing up what should have been an F5 for the pin but that’s not how Undertaker rolls around here.

Undertaker throws him through the set to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. There’s good and bad stuff on here but unfortunately the bad stuff is also the important stuff and that’s not something you can get around. The two World Title matches were both big misses and that’s too much for a great Benoit vs. Angle match and a strong Eddie vs. Edge match to overcome, especially when you add in the whole Stephanie vs. Eric thing.

Like it or not, that’s the biggest story in the company right now: the battling general managers. They’re supposed to be fighting over brand supremacy but no one has given us a reason to care about either brand in particular. Then again that never stopped anyone from running with an idea before and it seems that we’re going to be stuck with this one for a good while to come. It’s all about the big angle and if people don’t like it, that’s just too bad. There’s enough strong stuff on here but it really needs some major editing and re-writes to make it a good show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6