Smackdown
Date: January 20, 2012
Location: Thomas and Mack Center, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T

It’s another world title match tonight, this time with Henry getting his rematch. We’re in Vegas though so tonight, it’s the return of Spin the Wheel Make the Deal (Always thought Raw Roulette was a weak name). That means gimmick matches a go-go and hopefully a little build up to the Rumble other than like 4 guys. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week with AJ getting run over by Big Show.

Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is the ice storm keeping my grandmother in Washington.

Here’s Bryan to open the show. He says the name Sin City Smackdown is appropriate because Big Show committed a sin last week by running over AJ. Show is bitter because his reign was so short. AJ is severely injured and her career may be over. She was out there because she loves Bryan, which no one has ever said to him before. AJ will be here in spirit though. He’s not afraid of Henry or Show either, the latter of which isn’t here tonight. Bryan says that’s good because he couldn’t be held responsible for what he would do to Show. Show should just quit.

There’s a casino setup in the back and it’s basically a party. Aksana and Teddy are talking and sexual shenanigans are implied. Cody interrupts them and says Goldust spun the wheel to get a Vegas Showgirls Match. I’m not sure if he’s serious or not. Cody spins and gets Player’s Choice. He can pick his opponent for his match which is up next. Cody points to the left and says he picks him. At first it appears to be Jackson, then Marella, but it’s really Horny.

Cody Rhodes vs. Hornswoggle

It seems that the newest tagline that they’re trying to get over is that Cody is the last hope for the Rhodes’ Family. Cody shoves Horny down in the aisle but Justin Gabriel runs down for the save. Justin jumps on the match and challenges Cody. Cody insists it’s non-title and it’s on.

Cody Rhodes vs. Justin Gabriel

Justin pounds him down in the corner and a dropkick sends Cody to the ropes. Cody comes back with a dropkick of his own. Off to a chinlock as Horny plays cheerleader. Cody grabs the arm and cranks on it. Cole makes fun of Booker, Josh gets us back to the match, I’m sure you know the drill. Justin comes back with an enzigrui and loads up the 450 but Cody moves. Cole: “How great was that?” Booker: “He just moved.” Backslide gets two for Justin as does a springboard crossbody. Justin tries a monkey flip but gets dropped on the ropes. Cross Rhodes gets the pin at 3:42.

Rating: C-. Not bad here and for a quick match it was fine. Having this be Justin instead of Horny was good as it gets Justin on TV and lets Cody get another impressive looking win. Nothing bad in that and everyone looks a little bit better. Now why can’t we get more matches like this one?

Mark spins the wheel for his title match tonight. He’s not happy with having to do it and blames Teddy for AJ getting hurt last week. It’ll be his fault when Bryan is hurt later. Mark tells Teddy to spin for him and it’s a lumberjack match. That’s cool with Henry.

Epico/Primo vs. Usos

Please don’t have them get squashed. This is a tornado match, meaning tagging isn’t required and everyone is in the ring at once. We get a Siva Tao which makes me very happy. And Booker is playing with toys. Brawl to start and Epico gets beaten down. Jey gets dropped to the floor and it’s a handicap situation for a bit. Jey finally gets back in and the Usos take over with Samoan Twin Magic. Stereo splashes look to set up stereo Umaga corner bumps and they go to the corner. Rosa yells a lot and Jey gets caught. Superfly Splash gets two but Primo makes the save and a Backstabber ends this at 2:40.

Don’t try this at home.

This Rumble Moment: last year with Booker and Nash. Santino coming in at the end had me freaking out. Brilliantly done.

Aksans talks about slot machines and sex jokes are made. Sheamus comes in before this hits PG-13. Sheamus vs. Barrett is a tables match.

It’s time for a dance off. Listen to that pop for Brodus! And yes I know it’s probably canned but I’m loving this character. Booker and Cole lose it over the dinosaur claws thing. I know it’s stupid but my goodness this is great. His opponent: Vickie Guerrero. Vickie says she can dance but she looks like she’s a puppet. Brodus has Cameron and Naomi dance for him first, then shakes more than federal law should allow.

Clay is declared the winner but Vickie protests. She dances more but cue…..William Regal? He defends Vickie who is crying. She leaves and Brodus asks where Regal is going. He calls Regal a funky chicken (then makes Hawk noises)….and it’s on. Regal says hit his music and it’s better than expected, but Aww Funk It. Brodus says someone call his Mama.

Don’t be a bully.

Sheamus vs. Wade Barrett

Tables match. Barrett takes him to the corner to start which is fine for Sheamus as he pounds away. It’s a brawl to start and Barrett is sent to the floor. Sheamus’ back is rammed into the barricade and Barrett gets a table. One gets set up on the floor but Barrett escapes and sends Sheamus into the post to take over. Back inside where there is no table. Barrett almost kicks him off the apron through the table but Sheamus hangs on.

A suplex is countered and Sheamus gets the clubbing forearms on the apron. A running forearm knocks Barrett over the table and slams him into the table at ringside. Sheamus puts another table into the ring but Barrett kicks him in the face. Barrett puts it in instead and Sheamus is in trouble. Wasde sets to drive him through it, only to have Sheamus counter with a sunset flip. Sheamus pounds away and puts him on the table.

Barrett breaks up whatever Sheamus was going to try from the top and tries a superplex. Sheamus breaks it up and jumps over the table then catches Barrett in the Irish Curse. Table is put up in the corner but as Sheamus sets to put him through it, Jinder freaking Mahal comes out for a distraction and Barrett puts Sheamus through it for the win at approximately 9:00 (had some clock issues so that might not be accurate).

Rating: C. The match was fine, but for the life of me I don’t get what they’re shooting for with Mahal. I could understand it if they had him beat Sheamus EVER, but it’s been basically a series of squashes every time they face each other. I don’t get the point of it and I don’t get what they’re trying to do with him. He needs to actually win something to be viewed as a threat, which is what it seems like they’re going with in him.

Post match Mahal sets up a table for Sheamus, but just like every other time, Sheamus shrugs him off and puts Mahal through the table after a Brogue Kick.

Ted DiBiase vs. Hunico

We don’t know the stipulation yet. Teddy spins the wheel and it’s a flag match. You have to get the flag from the corner to win it. They run out and put up the posts with flags. Nice to see them having something that seems spontaneous like that. Quick inset interview has DiBiase saying that Hunico and Camacho can have their own party after losing tonight. Hunico takes him down to start but Dibiase gets in a reverse powerbomb to take over. His attempt at the flag doesn’t work but neither does Hunico’s. DiBiase gets launched to the floor but he manages to shove Hunico off the ropes. Back in DiBiase hits Dream Street and wins at 2:19.

Raw ReBound eats up about four minutes.

Teddy tells Drew that he’s fired. Santino pops up and asks him to reconsider. He doesn’t like the idea that his victory over Drew was a fluke. Unfunny dice jokes are made and Drew has one more chance in a blindfold match. Oh sweet hamburgers.

Don’t try this at home, the Kofi edition.

Santino Marella vs. Drew McIntyre

It’s a blindfold match. Let’s get this over with. The Cobra gets a blindfold too. They throw blind strikes but Santino immediately gets two the pointing with the crowd helping. He has the Cobra loaded up already but Drew tackles him and they stumble to the floor. Drew punches the post and they get back in. Drew peaks but still misses a running boot. Using the audience for help, Santino hits the Cobra and gets the pin at 2:09. I can live with this because they kept it short. Usually these things are like ten minutes long.

Here come the lumberjacks.

Smackdown World Title: Mark Henry vs. Daniel Bryan

Lumberjack match. This gets big match intros, as it should. Bryan gets more boos than cheers. Bryan’s first kick is countered and he gets shoved around with ease. The champ gets knocked to the apron a few times and tells the lumberjacks not to touch him. Henry stands on him chest and takes over with his size. The fans chant Sexual Chocolate. Bryan is knocked to the floor and Barrett tosses him back in.

We take a break and come back to see Bryan getting tossed around again. Bryan goes for the knee and eventually gets Henry down to his knees. A big kick to the head gets two and a power kickout. The lumberjacks won’t throw Bryan back in so once he slides in himself, Mark takes his head off. Henry gets all ticked off and gorilla presses him to the floor. Bryan gets in a fight with the lumberjacks and Henry gets thrown to the floor but they can’t throw him back in. Half of them come in and Henry shoves half of them off. Everyone comes in and it’s thrown out at about 7:15 shown of 10:45. The bell never ended it so that’s a guess.

Rating: D. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: these matches with Bryan vs. giants are only going to be able to be so good, because unless you make one of them look like an idiot, there’s no reasonable way to have Bryan go toe to toe with them. Just like last week, this got pretty boring pretty quickly and there isn’t much of a way around that because nothing Bryan does can hurt Show or Henry.

Bryan escapes and it’s basically a battle royal to end it. Cole freaks at Bryan for leaving. That’s rather smart actually. Teddy yells at Bryan in the back. He makes a triple threat match for the Rumble with Bryan defending against Big Show and Henry in a cage. That’s been the house show main event for a few weeks so that makes sense.

Overall Rating: C-. I really wasn’t feeling this one. It’s certainly not a bad show, but it all depends on how well you like the gimmick. The matches were really nothing interesting at all but they fit with the feuds (mostly) and we got our world title match for the PPV. Not a great show at all but it got some stuff for the PPV and had some fun moments so it’s not all bad. I’m not a fan of the gimmick though, so your personal opinion may vary.

Results
Cody Rhodes b. Justin Gabriel – Cross Rhodes
Epico/Primo b. Usos – Backstabber to Jimmy
Wade Barrett b. Sheamus – Barrett put Sheamus through a table
Ted DiBiase b. Hunico – DiBiase captured the flag
Santino Marella b. Drew McIntyre – Cobra
Daniel Bryan vs. Mark Henry went to a no contest when the lumberjacks interfered

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Smackdown
Date: December 30, 2011
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T

It’s the final show of the year and we close things out with the Blue Guys. As long as it’s not Blue Meanie I’m cool with that. Anyway tonight we should get some advancement in the three way world title feud. I hope they don’t make Bryan look like a joke in this that can’t get in any offense and has to escape with whatever kind of win he can get. Those title reigns completely defeat the purpose of being a champion. Then again so does MITB in general but whatever. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about Barrett vs. Orton. Their match tonight is the main event and it’s falls count anywhere. I’m curious to see how this ends, which I’m sure you’ve heard about already.

Do you know your enemy? Mine is the number 2012, since I’ll be writing 2011 for at least two more weeks.

Here’s Booker coming out to do commentary. You know, his job. I wonder if he gets his pay docked for being late like this. He talks about how this has been a great year for him, starting with the Rumble and then joining the commentary booth. Then on Monday he beat Cody Rhodes and that’s all because of the fans. He goes for his catchphrase but here’s Cody to interrupt him.

Cody makes fun of local spots teams and the Indy 500 because that’s what heels do. No seriously, it’s a fine way to get the crowd booing you so why not do it? Rhodes talks about his year, ranging from being injured to beating Mysterio to winning the IC Title. Then he took a washed up announcer and pushed him to regain some of his former glory. Booker says that when he beat Cody on Monday, he wasn’t that washed up. If Cody respected the business, he’d be congratulating Booker right now.

The champ actually agrees and says that he doesn’t want to come off as some kind of bitter jerk because he’s better than that. He actually congratulates Booker and offers a handshake. Booker shakes it and gets in his face a bit but turns to leave. Cody says of course now this is all over. Booker isn’t sure what he means by that, but Cody says the fairy tale is over and Booker is nothing but a nostalgia act. If Booker keeps competing, his skills will be exposed as being gone. If he goes back to announcing, he’ll be exposed as an illiterate moron. In short, Booker is a joke.

Cue….Dustin Rhodes? He comes out to the Goldust music but he’s in a suit and no makeup. Dustin says he loves his brother very much but Cody is going about this all wrong. Booker is someone that Cody should respect because it was Booker that inspired Dustin to face his demons and make a comeback. Dustin gets the idea of building your own legacy, but don’t do it at Booker’s expense. Cody knows better than this.

Cody chuckles at this and says that as soon as Booker stopped teaming with him, Dustin fell back into those demons and then into utter obscurity. Booker gets in Cody’s face and asks for a third match with Cody since it’s one apiece at the moment. He wants to do it right now but Cody says we’ll do it next week. Booker says that next week it’ll be a celebration when he becomes the new Intercontinental Champion. Booker leaves and Cody beats Dustin down. Booker makes the save but Cody is long gone. Not a bad opening segment.

Tonight’s main event: it’s a tag team match!

Ted DiBiase vs. Jinder Mahal

If DiBiase is supposed to be this everyman now, shouldn’t he lose the I’m Rich theme song? They exchange quick control to start but Mahal keeps his, hitting a Vader Bomb knee drop for two. The crowd isn’t exactly thrilled by DiBiase vs. Legs Mahal here. Ted gets in a few shots to slow Mahal down but tweeks his knee coming off the top. A Downward Spiral (so fed up with that move) sets up the Camel Clutch and Dibiase surprisinly taps at 2:50. Didn’t see that one coming.

Teddy is talking about his New Year’s Eve party tomorrow night when Aksana comes in. More flirtations are made and Drew McIntyre comes in. He’s been signed back to Smackdown and Teddy is willing to forgive him. Drew isn’t going to get paid what he was getting earlier when his career has fallen apart. He gets Big Zeke tonight and if he doesn’t win, his job might be in jeopardy. Drew talks about the time he made Teddy beg for mercy and says that’s nothing compared to what he’ll do to Jackson.

Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn vs. Natalya/Tamina

Tamina looks better with straight hair. The lack of JTG helps a lot also. Tamina vs. Kaitlyn starts us off. The evil ones take over on Kaitlyn and beat her down. Something like a Michinoku Driver by Natalya does nothing here as Kaitlyn makes the tag about two seconds later. Alicia hits the axe kick on Nattie for the pin at 1:34. Why do they bother with these matches? I honestly don’t know.

Tamina beats up Natalya post match, including a Superfly Splash.

Don’t be a bully.

Raw ReBound eats up some time.

We get a standard recap of Show vs. Otunga on Monday with Henry coming in as well. Bryan made the save.

Speaking of Bryan, he’s in the back talking with AJ (who looks GREAT tonight in a black cut off top and jeans) about how he saved Big Show. Show comes up and asks to talk to Bryan alone. Show says that giants don’t really need to be saved. Teddy comes in and says that the tag match main event won’t be happening tonight as Otunga wants a rematch with Show. Henry will be in his corner. Bryan implies he’ll have Show’s back but doesn’t exactly say it.

Justin Gabriel vs. Hunico

I think there’s new music for Gabriel but I’m not 100% sure. Hunico comes out on a lowrider bicycle with his new bodyguard who used to be in FCW and is named Camacho here. I don’t remember his FCW name. Further investigations (as in I looked it up on Wikipedia) says that his name there is Donny Marlow and his dad is more famous as Meng or Haku.

Cole says he has a lot of knowledge about lowrider bicycles. Hunico gets sent to the floor and Gabriel misses a dive. Cole gives us the history of lowrider bikes and all I can think of is….why? There’s something about Eddie Munster mentioned in there. Justin misses a springboard something coming back in but hits a powerbomb style move to take over. Hunico breaks up the 450 and brings Gabriel down so that the Swanton can end this at 1:48. This was nothing and Camacho didn’t get involved at all.

Hunico/Camacho hit something like Cryme Tyme’s old finisher to leave Gabriel on the mat (Samoan Drop/neckbreaker combo).

Big Show vs. David Otunga

If nothing else we get the big knockout punch from last week which still looks great. Otunga has really long arms. Henry gets his own entrance. Show beats him down as Otunga tries to get in whatever offense he can. David bails to the floor where Henry gives him something resembling a pep talk. Back in a shoulder block puts Otunga down as does a corner splash. Henry gets on the apron to distract from the chokeslam and Otunga hits a chop block and DDT for two. Henry goes to get in the ring but Bryan pops up with a belt shot to stop him. The big punch knocks Otunga out cold at 3:24.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here and that’s about it. Bryan coming out didn’t really mean anything or add anything as it wasn’t like Show needed help. Also it doesn’t help that he looks like a mosquito who keeps running in and hitting people then running. Nothing to see here but Otunga can sell a punch really well.

Ezekiel Jackson vs. Drew McIntyre

Jackson has some hair now. We get Drew’s full entrance and I miss his song. Big Zeke controls with power for a few moments but Drew takes over pretty quickly. Jackson beats him down more and this match isn’t going to last long. A big boot by Drew gets two. Northern lights suplex gets two. Jackson backdrops him and the fans don’t care. Side slam gets two for the power man. Torture Rack is countered and Drew gets a boot up in the corner. It gets two even with his feet on the ropes. Drew argues with the ropes and Jackson rolls him up (with a big handful of tights) for the pin at 3:52.

Rating: D-. Terribly boring match here and I have no idea what the point of it was. Drew has fallen so far in the last year and a half that it’s almost scary. I don’t get the point in having Jackson use the tights but maybe it’ll be addressed in the future. Jackson is pretty worthless as he isn’t interesting at all and now he has to cheat to win matches over Drew Freaking McIntyre? Not a good match at all.

Video on Sheamus. I think they aired this months ago. I remember the rock version of Written In My Face.

Drew yells about the tights in the back and Teddy says he can’t stand losers. He’s a ticked off Peanut here. Old school fans will get that joke.

Here’s Sheamus for a little chat. “What’s the crack Indianapolis?” Is that an Irish thing? He wants to talk about the future and by that he means the Royal Rumble. The winner gets a title match at Wrestlemania. He doesn’t care who he eliminates because he’s going to win the Rumble. Cue Hornswoggle to get on my nerves. Horny is going to enter the Rumble as well because miracles like Bryan beating Big Show can happen. He says he’ll win (only saying his own name). Sheamus admires that and gives us some Irish folk lore or whatever you want to call it. He gets all mean but is only playing.

Cue Heath Slater who is a breath of air. I can’t stand Horny at all. Slater mentions guys like Bushwhacker Luke and the Brooklyn Brawler, who fall into the same category as Horny: the guy that says they’ll win and is a joke. Slater says he’s the greatest redhead on Smackdown and the only reason Horny won the battle royal was because Sheamus didn’t want to squash a leprechaun. Slater doesn’t have that problem though. Sheamus gets in his face and….sings Don’t Stop Believin. Ok then. Sheamus says he sees Slater as more of an R. Kelly kind of guy, because he believes he can fly, and there goes Slater. That was…yeah.

Sheamus vs. Heath Slater

Kind of awkward here as Sheamus was celebrating after throwing Slater out and we went to a break. Back and they’re having a match. Sheamus pounds him down and works on the arm and then throws Heath to the apron. Slater slaps him and that was very stupid, so here are ten forearms to the chest for his efforts. Sheamus keeps countering him but Slater drop toeholds him into the middle buckle. Slater gets him onto the mat and hooks a chinlock. The counter to that triggers Sheamus’ comeback which consists of forearms to the back, a top rope shoulder and the Brogue Kick for the pin at 4:45 shown.

Rating: D+. The Rumble is probably the best thing that could possibly happen to Sheamus at this point. He doesn’t have anything to do on Smackdown as it was looking like he was the next opponent for Henry but then Henry got hurt so they had to go to the Bryan reign. Since then he’s just been beating up random people without breaking a sweat, which can only get you so far.

Bryan is talking to Teddy when Show comes in. He’s getting annoyed at Bryan for always being there. Bryan wants a thank you for being there to bail Show out. They start growling at each other and we’re told that it’s Show vs. Bryan for the title next week. Show laughs a lot at that. Bryan says even if he loses, his reign lasted longer than 45 seconds.

Whoever they are, they’re still coming. I’m kind of curious about that but I’m expecting a letdown.

We hype the three big title matches spread over the next week of shows.

Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett

Falls count anywhere. Slugout to start and Orton hammers him into the corner. Out to the floor and Barrett goes into the steps for two. With Barrett’s head on the steps, a stomp gets two. Usually that would crack a skull but in wrestling it only gets two. That’s why I love this stuff. RKO is countered and Orton goes into the post as we take a break.

Back with them in the ring and Barrett hammering away. He hits that running boot to Orton as Orton is sitting on the middle rope which gets two on the floor. Big boot in the ring gets two and we hit the chinlock. Middle rope elbow gets the same. Back to the chinlock as this has been a lot more basic than I was expecting. Orton gets in the powerslam but Barrett escapes the elevated DDT by heading to the floor.

Orton throws him over the table and they go into the crowd. They go into the back and Orton goes through a table. Randy sends him into an anvil case as Barrett tries to escape down the hall. The referee went down earlier so he’s not here. They fight into an elevator and we actually cut to a security camera feed in the elevator.

They brawl out into what looks like a corporate area and a cameraman has to run to catch up to them. The camera goes through a door and we hear shouting and a crash. He catches up to them and Barrett is standing at the top of a flight of steps. Orton is laying at the bottom in a shape that probably isn’t that comfortable. The camera looks down at him as he can barely move and we go off the air.

Rating: C. Pretty boring main event for the most part but once they got to the wild brawl it wasn’t that bad. Word is Orton has a legit bad back so this is the angle that they’re going with to write him off TV for awhile. That’s fine and not having a pin works here because there’s no point in having a pin with that being the closing shot of the show. Not terrible and the ending did the job it was supposed to do.

Overall Rating: C. I wasn’t huge on this show. The point of it was to get Orton off TV for awhile and that worked out pretty well. Barrett looks great and we have a world title match set for next week. I’m honestly not sure what they’re going to do with Bryan as the way he won the title makes him look like a fluke and there’s a chance they’ll pull it off of him with a Show heel turn. Either way, not a horrible show but nothing at all worth going out of your way to see.

Results
Jinder Mahal b. Ted DiBiase – Camel Clutch
Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn b. Natalya/Tamina – Axe Kick to Natalya
Hunico b. Justin Gabriel – Swanton Bomb
Big Show b. David Otunga – WMD
Drew McIntyre b. Ezekiel Jackson – Rollup
Sheamus b. Heath Slater – Brogue Kick
Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton went to a no contest

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Smackdown
Date: December 23, 2011
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T

We have a new world champion here (can’t say Heavyweight at the moment) and it’s Daniel Bryan. He cashed in his MITB case on Sunday after Big Show slayed the giant (no pun intended) and won the title. I’m not sure where they go from here because Bryan isn’t someone that could credibly beat either of those guys. Still though it should be interesting to see where they go from here. Expect a potential throwaway show like Monday though. Let’s get to it.

Do you know your enemy? Mine is a DVD burner that keeps skipping.

Here’s Big Show to open the show. He talks about how he should be world champion here. Show says he worked 9 years to get back to the world title and he finally got there. On Sunday he beat the only man that has ever been able to throw him around the ring. Show has a lot of mixed emotions such as disappointment, anger, shock and he’s conflicted. He’s not having a good day. We get a clip from Monday where Josh pointed out that Show has the shortest reign in history. The long stare at Josh was great.

Show says he’s proud of himself for not going over the edge. He wants to give us his honest feelings but here’s Henry. Henry wants to know why Show is proud. He says that’ll be on Show’s tombstone. Henry says Show should be embarrassed and humiliated. Show should take a week off then quit. Maybe he can get a job working as Santa. Henry is here to demand his rematch. Why would he get one? Show questions that too and here’s Bryan. There’s Tebow reference #1 during his entrance.

Booker says Bryan is officially back in the Fave Five. Bryan says no one in the arena, not even him, believes he’s the World Heavyweight Champion. He says he’s not the biggest, tallest, strongest, fastest, or most attractive. Nothing about him screams WWE Superstar but he’s a great wrestler. Despite all the things he’s not, he’s the World Heavyweight Champion.

Henry says he’s beaten Bryan up every time they’ve fought and he wants his title match tonight. Show says he beat Henry so he should get the shot. The big guys get ready to fight and here’s Teddy. They’ll have a #1 contenders match tonight. No time is given for when the world title match would take place. Show shakes Bryan’s hand. Bryan offers a handshake to Henry who eventually goes to shake but Bryan pulls it away. Kind of a jerk no?

Cody Rhodes vs. Zack Ryder

Non-title here. Cody grabs the arm to start and Cole is talking about mood rings. He’s all over Booker here and it’s getting old fast. Zack uses some armdrags and hooks an armbar. Cody knocks him to the floor and rams Ryder into Booker. Booker glares at him as we take a break. Back with Cody hitting the Alabama Slam for two. Ryder starts a brief comeback but a cross body hits the ropes, getting two for Cody.

Zack puts the brakes on in the corner and they ram heads. Back up and Ryder takes over to a nice reaction to the crowd. A running forearm in the corner sets up the Broski Boot for two. A middle rope dropkick misses and Booker grabs the mic. He leads the audience in a song about Cody the Red Nosed Reindeer. The distraction lets the Rough Ryder get the pin at 6:23 shown of 9:53.

Rating: C. The match was fine but apparently they’re continuing the Booker vs. Cody feud. That’s fine as Cody beat Booker up before the match so it wasn’t exactly a clean victory. Not bad and it wasn’t really meant to be anything significant. Also it’s good that it wasn’t a clean win over either guy as they need to keep both of these guys looking strong.

Santino comes into Teddy’s office and suggests he should be the new assistant to Teddy due to Zack being champion now. Aksana comes in and sexual innuendo is made about her being the assistant. She and Santino leave so Vickie and Dolph come in. Vickie says everything aligned and Zack got lucky. Dolph says the same thing happened for Bryan to win the title. He asks for a match with Bryan tonight and Teddy sounds happy with it. Vickie says Bah Humbug to Teddy for some reason.

Big Show vs. Mark Henry

Earlier in the show than I expected. And here’s David Otunga before the bell rings. He works for Johnny Ace and Ace is in charge of all WWE talent. Henry isn’t medically cleared to wrestle tonight so there’s no match. He wishes everyone a happy and healthy holiday (booed) and turns around into the WMD. He sold it really well too. The replay made it look even better. Show DRILLED him.

Teddy is walking in the back when Miz comes up. He asks Teddy what he’s doing tonight. Miz was told to be here tonight but Teddy says that wasn’t from his office. Miz says that’s more proof that Johnny Ace is running circles around him. Here’s a very telling stat for you: since he won the WWE Title, no Smackdown star has been in a main event of a PPV. I looked it up and it’s even longer than that. The last time it happened (excluding the Rumble) was Hell in a Cell 2010, or a streak of 16 PPVs in a row. Miz says he’s going to stop the show and not let a match happen. Teddy says we’ll see about that.

After a break Miz is in the ring. He isn’t surprised Teddy couldn’t find anyone to face him and shows clips of him hurting Truth and Morrison. He says all of the Smackdown locker room is full of cowards. There’s no star on Smackdown who shines brighter than the rest like he does. He’s the one on Conan and on the top rated radio show on Sirius XM. He also has an opponent who interrupts him.

Sheamus vs. The Miz

Miz tries to go toe to toe with him for some reason as Cole compares their mainstream appeal. Miz sends him into the post for two. He “hits” a running boot to the face and a DDT for two. It’s been mostly Miz for the majority of this. He takes forever coming out of the corner though and runs into a double axe from Sheamus to shift control. Miz escapes the Celtic Cross and kicks Sheamus in the arm he’s been holding. The Finale is escaped and the Brogue Kick kills Miz dead at 3:03.

Rating: C-. Miz looked a lot more dominant than he usually does here which was surprising. The match was nothing special and I’m kind of surprised they would have Miz lose clean that fast. Sheamus would seem to be the next guy in line for a title shot but we have to get the required return matches out of the way first.

Here’s Barrett for some chatter. He says nothing can stop the Barrett Barrage and we get a recap of the Barrett vs. Orton feud on the Tron. Barrett thinks his dominance of Orton puts him in line for a title shot. He wishes us a happy Christmas and goes to leave but here’s Orton and it’s on in the aisle. Orton slides him into the ring and tries an RKO but Barrett runs.

Randy chases him into the back and the fight continues there. Barrett kicks him in the ribs and tries to run again and they fight to a bicycle rack. Orton then….sprays Barrett with a gardening hose. Well at least that’s not it as he sends him into a table of bottled water and pours trash on him. They go to the cars now and it’s an RKO onto the top of one. The sound of that was great.

Same Second Coming video from Monday. I’m legit curious as to who it is.

Primo vs. Kofi Kingston

Primo immediately jumps him and Cole thinks the cousins have Air Boom’s number. I have a feeling they’ll be doing the whole “lose lose lose then win one match” road to the titles for them, which is horrible but common in WWE today. Primo controls and sweeps the leg to get Kofi down. Kofi ducks a charge and takes over as things speed up. The springboard cross body gets two. Rosa and Epico distract Kofi, allowing Primo to hit a top rope armdrag. And there’s Trouble in Paradise for the pin at 3:09.

Rating: C-. Decent enough match but I’m really not looking forward to the seemingly inevitable new champions, mainly because they’re a very boring gimmick. The Mexican team is something that can only go so far and the Colons are proof of that. Nothing to see here but Kofi made it decent enough.

Music video recapping TLC and Raw with the new champions celebrating.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Daniel Bryan

They have a TON of time. They go to the mat but Ziggler is very skilled there too so Bryan gets out of it. Booker and Cole get into their usual pattern of bickering until Josh gets things back under control. Bryan takes him to the mat and hooks a full surfboard. That move always impresses me. A dropkick misses and Dolph takes over. Ziggler does the situps thing but Bryan tries a LeBell Lock. Ziggler gets to the ropes and drop toe holds the champ into the middle buckle. Bryan is down as we take a break.

Back with Dolph taking Bryan down again via a dropkick. After a quick chinlock they collide in the middle and both guys are down. Here’s Swagger as Bryan sends Ziggler to the floor. The flying shove takes Dolph down but Swagger runs Bryan over. Now here’s Big Show who stalks Swagger. Ziggler grabs a sleeper but Bryan counters into a German for two. Here are the kicks and a BIG one to the head takes Dolph down for two. They go up to the corner and Bryan hits a top rope rana which Ziggler rolls through into a sunset flip for two. Fameasser gets two.

They go to the corner again and Ziggler gets crotched into a belly to back superplex for two. This is getting really good. Swagger jumps Big Show and they go into the ring. And here’s Teddy to make it a tag match. SCREW THAT! I’m really getting tired of these tag match main events. We had a good match going here and now we get ANOTHER tag match instead. The match ran about 12:20 in total, counting commercial.

Rating: B. This really did make me mad. I was getting into their match but we have to get Big Show and Swagger in on this. And for WHAT? What reason does Swagger have to jump Show there other than the script calls for it? I guess the idea of having the world champion and one of the only interesting heels having a great match isn’t what this company looks for right? We want pointless tags!

Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger vs. Big Show/Daniel Bryan

We join this in progress as Show takes Swagger to the mat. Off to Ziggler who gets caught in the corner and pounded on. After Show beats him down, here’s Bryan to pick the bones. He misses a corner charge and lands on the back of his head. Back to Swagger who hits a Vader Bomb for two. The Double G Connection works on the leg and then it’s time for the sleeper. That gets countered quickly and there’s the tag to Show as well as Swagger. Swagger counters a chokeslam and takes out the knee. Bryan makes a blind tag and rolls through the ankle lock into the LeBell Lock for the tap at 6:54.

Rating: C. This match ticked me off. For one thing, Bryan looks like he can’t beat Ziggler without Show. I mean Heaven forbid a face gets a clean win over a heel right? Here’s my gripe with this in general: who does this benefit? Bryan can go toe to toe with Dolph and can beat Swagger, which we knew coming in. Swagger doesn’t win much, which we knew coming in. Ziggler can go toe to toe with Bryan, which we knew coming in. Show is dominant, which we knew coming in. Instead of giving us something new and conclusive, it’s like they punted and played it safe, which is annoying when we had a good match going.

Bryan celebrates with the belt and Show doesn’t look all that pleased.

Overall Rating: B-. Not a bad show and less of a throwaway one before the ending. I know I’m harping on that a lot but it really ticked me off. What’s the point in doing that? Ok I’ll drop it now because the rest of the show was pretty good. Nothing great, but there was nothing to complain about until the end. This show went by fast too, which was a good thing. Pretty good show until the annoying main event.

Results
Zack Ryder b. Cody Rhodes – Rough Ryder
Sheamus b. Miz – Brogue Kick
Kofi Kingston b. Primo – Trouble in Paradise
Dolph Ziggler vs. Daniel Bryan went to a no contest
Big Show/Daniel Bryan b. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger – LeBell Lock to Swagger

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Monday Night Raw
Date: December 19, 2011
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re into that limbo period between TLC and the Rumble. There are six Raws before the PPV and based on that, there are usually multiple shows where not much happens. I’d expect the next two to be that way, especially with Christmas coming up. These are usually throwaway shows and that’s ok, especially given how much they had happen last night. Let’s get to it.

Let’s Burn it to the Ground.

We open with the lights off and almost everything dark. Punk starts talking and says that we’re live in the entertainment capital of….this state, and here are the results of TLC. Since Johnny Ace is the least creative middle man in the history of management, here’s the result of TLC. First of all, who won the TLC main event? The three options are shown and Punk says it was him, the best wrestler in the world.

Here’s Punk who looks very happy. He talks about being banged up and sore but he’s the champion. This is a title that a lot of people never thought he would win. That brings him to the next match from last night: the US Title match. He does the who won thing again and brings out Ryder, who is WAY over in Philadelphia. Think about that. He’s insanely over in Philadelphia, just like he was in MSG.

Now let’s talk about the big one. There was a chairs match, but the man that walked out with the title wasn’t one of the people originally in it. The World Heavyweight Champion, is Daniel Bryan. They all stand in the ring with their new titles and it’s quite a visual. Punk talks about how if any city would appreciate this, it’s Philadelphia. The fans chant ECW and Punk mentions how awesome it is that two guys like Bryan and Punk who met ten years ago down the street would be here in this ring as world champions.

Punk says this isn’t about him but rather about those two. They’ve broken their backs for wrestling and the people have brought them to this level. Let’s hear from the new champions. Ryder says he called his dad this morning and asked if he really was champion. His dad’s response: “WOO WOO WOO! You know it!” Bryan says there are people like Cole that says he didn’t belong here, but now he’s the World Heavyweight Champion.

Bryan gets cut off because Miz, Ziggler and Del Rio all come out and head to the ring. The champions hold them off until Ryder hits a flip dive onto Ziggler. He goes into the barricade so the world champs go after Miz and Del Rio. Ace cuts them off and the champs go check on Ryder who is holding his shoulder. Ace makes a six man tag for the main event. No stipulations are announced.

Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton

Orton won a tables match last night. They slug it out to start and head to the floor pretty quickly. Barrett takes over and rams Orton into the post and drapes him over the barricade as we take a break. Back with Barrett kicking Orton in the face to send him outside. Orton is looking less orange tonight. He starts his comeback and hits the powerslam. Elevated DDT is countered as is the Wasteland. Backbreaker sets up the DDT but Barrett pokes him in the eye afterwards….for a DQ at 8:00? Seriously? A THUMB TO THE EYE GETS A DQ NOW???

Rating: D+. They were kind of going through the motions until the ending here which is ok because I like Barrett’s in ring style, but the rest of the match was pretty boring. The ending was rather stupid but it continues the feud and lets us have another match here, which Barrett could win and move on to a match with Bryan at the Rumble.

Post match Barrett beats Orton up with the Bossman Slam (now called Winds of Change) and a Wasteland through a table.

We recap HHH vs. Nash last night. Nash is going to be out for six weeks, which will put him right in line for the Rumble right?

Beth Phoenix vs. Alicia Fox

Non-title here I think. Alicia is trending worldwide, reverse DDT, flipping legdrop, Alicia pins her 100% clean in 48 seconds.

Alicia wishes everyone a foxy holiday.

Sheamus vs. Jinder Mahal

Why is this match still happening? Mahal hasn’t had a chance against him yet and we’re seeing this again? He takes over to start and hits some strikes to the head, be they either a knee or a dropkick. Sheamus wakes up and hits the Irish Curse and Celtic Cross for the pin at 1:57. Did anyone expect anything else?

Here’s Cena to address what happened last week. Naturally he’s loathed here in Philly. He says that what he’s about to say is shocking. If you have a medical condition, you need to cover your ears. He thinks there are some people that don’t like him. Some of them aren’t here (like Rock, who he’ll be ready for in April) but one of them is a monster on the loose who has issues with Christmas and the dentist.

Cena hopes that he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. If that’s the case, things move on and he won’t be going after Kane. If that’s not the case, they have some business and let’s settle it right now. Instead cue Henry who is badly limping. He says that if it wasn’t for Kane, Cena would be the new member of the Hall of Pain. The fans chant Sexual Chocolate. He says he’s not in the mood for jokes after losing the title last night. Henry is here to address why he lost and he’d recommend that Cena leaves now.

Now cue Kane’s pyro but the lights go out. There’s organ music and here he comes, complete with the welder’s mask. Henry has bailed and Kane circles the ring to look at him. Then he turns to look at Cena. Kane takes the mask off and has the red one on as he gets in the ring. Cena immediately hammers him down and clotheslines him over the ropes.

Kane lands on his feet and pulls Cena to the floor. He puts Cena on the table and puts his hand over Cena’s face and smothers him. I think Cena bit his lip because it looks like he’s bleeding from the mouth. Kane rips the shirt off Cena (it was cut at the top earlier) and leaves with it. Cena looks terrified.

Primo/Epico vs. Usos

We get the Siva Tao and Rosa dancing. My night is complete. Primo starts with let’s say Jey. The heels take over and I’d really rather just look at Rosa in those tiny shorts. Air Boom is watching in the back as Epico beats up Jey. Hot tag to Jimmy who hits a Bubba Bomb and the running Umaga (NOT RIKISHI) shot in the corner. And then the Backstabber ends him at 2:56. Too short to rate but it was pretty much the same thing from Smackdown.

Cody says the Rumble ad wasn’t as ridiculous as Booker thinking he could win the title. Santino pops up with a gift for him but Cody doesn’t want it. The Cobra pops out of it, as in the one on Santino’s arm.

Santino Marella vs. Cody Rhodes

Non-title again. Santino does some martial arts stuff and gets punched in the face. Santino gets in a few shots but shouting COBRA seems to be a bad idea as he walks into an Alabama Slam for the pin at 1:28.

Here’s Nickelback’s performance from Tribute to the Troops.

The Bellas hit on Ace and get in an argument over who is a floozy. They rant about Teddy and Ace says the board is watching him. He wishes them a Merry Christmas and they kiss him on the cheek then leave. Vickie barges in and demands a rematch for Ziggler. Horny pops in with mistletoe and kisses her, prompting lots of screaming.

We get an interview off WWE.com with Ryder and his dad after the show. That win really was a cool moment.

Big Show says he had it last night and it lasted 45 seconds. It took him 9 years to get there and he’s speechless. It’s his fault though because he encouraged Bryan to cash in a few weeks ago. Show looks like he wants to kill someone but is smiling most of the time. Josh eggs him on and says that Show is going to probably have the record for shortest world title reign in history and he’ll probably hold that forever. Show looks down at him and for some reason I’m cracking up at it. He shakes his head, says he’s ok, and walks away.

The Miz/Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder/Daniel Bryan/CM Punk

During Alberto’s entrance, the Second Coming video happens again. The word this time is prophetless. Is that even a word? Ryder comes in through the crowd. You can tell the Philly fans like him as they don’t mug him. Bryan does the same, as does Punk. How much nicer it is just to change ANYTHING a little bit. It can really make a huge difference. Punk vs. Miz gets us going. Bryan got by far the weakest reaction of all three faces if you’re curious.

Ziggler comes in and takes the surfboard knee stomp. Off to Ziggler who gets a Woo chant. Del Rio misses a charge and all three heels are outside. Bryan teases a suicide dive so that Ryder can hit his flip dive. Bryan takes out Ziggler with a knee from the apron and Punk dives off the top. The champs rule the ring (Punk takes a bow) as we take a break. Back with Bryan kicking Miz but getting caught in a DDT for two.

The heels beat on Bryan for awhile as we hit the main event formula for a tag match. Del Rio works on the arm and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Bryan gets his knees up and it’s hot tag to Ryder. The Broski Boot puts Ziggler down for two but he gets caught in a Miz chinlock. He backdrops Del Rio to the floor and it’s double tag to Miz and Punk. Macho Elbow of course gets an eruption in an old WWF town like Philly. Anaconda Vice goes on but Dolph makes the save. Another double tag brings in Del Rio and Miz and it breaks down quickly. GTS to Miz and Cole is losing it. The LeBell Lock ends Del Rio at 13:12.

Rating: C. This was a main event tag and this was fine. The whole point of this was to have some fun and let the new champions get their win on their first night with their titles. That’s perfectly fine and this wasn’t supposed to be anything big and epic. There’s nothing wrong with that and the match worked fine for what it was.

Big celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the point here. This was one of those throwaway shows I was talking about in the intro. It wasn’t bad or anything, but this was just a placeholder until we get to the new year and start the Rumble build. They did this for the last few years and that’s fine. The triple champion focus was a nice touch and it’s very refreshing to see them just mix things up a little bit. Fun show, although not very good from a quality standpoint.

Results
Randy Orton b. Wade Barrett via DQ when Barrett poked Orton in the eye
Alicia Fox b. Beth Phoenix – Flipping legdrop
Sheamus b. Jinder Mahal – Celtic Cross
Epico/Primo b. Usos – Backstabber to Jey
Cody Rhodes b. Santino Marella – Alabama Slam
CM Punk/Daniel Bryan/Zack Ryder b. The Miz/Dolph Ziggler/Alberto Del Rio – LeBell Lock to Del Rio

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Tables Ladders and Chairs 2011
Date: December 18, 2011
Location: 1st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This is the final PPV of the year for 2011 and I’m really not all that thrilled by it. The main event isn’t really clear, as there are a few matches that could go on last. It could be either of the world title matches or the ladder match with HHH vs. Nash. Surprisingly enough, there’s no Cena match on here to speak of. Also, hopefully, Ryder finally gets his US Title tonight. Let’s get to it.

Basic video, talking about choosing your weapon.

Vickie introduces Dolph.

US Title: Zack Ryder vs. Dolph Ziggler

Battle of the Z’s here. Ziggler has on blue trunks and they’re really not working for him. Ryder controls early on and is pretty fired up here. The champ gets control quickly though, hitting a DDT onto the apron. Ziggler drops a bunch (as in like ten) elbows on Ryder but they only get two. Off to a chinlock and the fans chant “Let’s go Ryder, Woo Woo Woo”. Ziggler uses Ryder’s body to brace himself for situps.

And now let’s start talking about Twitter. Ryder fights back but gets caught in an Angle Slam for two. Ryder comes back and hits a missile dropkick from the middle rope for two. Here’s his comeback and the Broski Boot hits. Vickie puts Ziggler’s foot on the ropes and gets ejected for it. They trade rollups and Ziggler tries two Fameassers, one of which hits. Dropkick gets two for Dolph. He goes up and gets crotched, allowing Ryder to bust out a top rope rana for two. I love how his arms fly up in the air on every cover.

Rough Ryder is countered into a hot shot into the post for two. The fans are still cheering for Ryder as they were earlier. Out of nowhere, Ryder hits the Rough Ryder and WINS THE TITLE at 10:25. The camera immediately cuts to Ryder’s dad in the crowd which is a really nice touch. They treated this like a really big moment, which it was.

Rating: B-. Why it didn’t happen in MSG is beyond me but whatever. This is the definition of a guy working as hard as he could have, the fans responding to it, and the company PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT THE PEOPLE WANTED. I can’t emphasize that enough: the WWE listened to what the fans were telling them and pushed him accordingly. Pretty decent match too.

Booker is getting ready in the back when Cody jumps him and beats him down. Booker says he’s ok and looks all ticked off.

Tag Titles: Air Boom vs. Epico/Primo

Epico vs. Bourne gets us started. They trade near falls for a little while and it’s off to Kofi. All champions so far. More near falls for the champions and the heels finally start double teaming Bourne. Rosa keeps shouting in Spanish because that’s what evil Hispanics do. Epico busts out some rolling belly to backs for two. How has this match been going five minutes already?

You would think a match with Kofi Kingston as the biggest guy would go a little faster. Gory Stretch by Epico is countered into a sunset flip for two. Hot tag finally brings in Kofi who hits every Puerto Rican in blue in sight. Boom Drop to Primo sets up Trouble in Paradise but he settles for a springboard crossbody instead. Everything breaks down and Bourne dives to the floor to take out Epico. Trouble in Paradise hits in the ring and they keep the titles at 7:32.

Rating: C-. This was fine and I can’t really complain about bonus wrestling. They had to flesh out the card somehow and I figured this might be the pick. Also it’s good to get the titles on PPV again, even in a match like this. Air Boom will probably drop them soon, but I hope it’s to someone better than the Colons Paso Dos.

Josh has no update on Booker but Cody was very happy a few seconds ago, so the match may be off. That’s not official though.

Teddy Long is in the back as Santa and Horny is his depressed elf. He finally points out that he’s an adult and asks why there’s a black Santa. Teddy: “In my neighborhood, no fat jolly white man would ever come down my chimney.” Teddy gives Horny a gift: Rosetta Stone Ebonics. Horny kicks Santa in the shin.

Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett

This is a tables match. Orton takes over quickly and goes for a table, but Barrett kicks it into his face with a thud. Orton is like “I have 4 nicknames” and goes after Barrett as Lawler makes Roman nose jokes. A table is set up outside and they fight up the aisle where there are like 8 tables set up. Barrett sets for the pumphandle through one of them but Orton escapes. Barrett THINKS and knocks the table near him away.

Back at ringside and Orton goes into the post and then takes a boot. Barrett is busted a bit. Wade takes forever messing with tables, setting one up on the floor and sliding one into the ring. Orton moves off the table to avoid a dive so Barrett pounds on him some more. In the ring a middle rope elbow hits Orton and Barrett takes him to the apron. He hits a big boot to try to knock Randy through the table on the floor but Orton hooks the rope.

Barrett sets one up in the corner but Orton starts his comeback. Powerslam puts Wade down and there’s a counter to the elevated DDT. Barrett tries a running big boot but gets caught in the ropes. He tries Wasteland on the apron but Orton elbows out of it. Now the elevated DDT hits in the ring. Barrett reverses a throw into the corner table and hits the Bossman Slam to take over. He beats on Orton a bit more and puts him on the table. Wade goes to the second turnbuckle on the inside but jumps into an RKO through the table to end this at 10:16.

Rating: C. These matches are hard to grade because they’re regular matches without covers until the end. I think everyone probably knew this was going to be Orton winning, but the good thing is that it keeps Barrett hot because he doesn’t get pinned. Also he can still get a win next month or on Smackdown so this is probably far from done. Not great, but nothing too bad.

The Bellas sit on Teddy’s lap and debate who the good or bad sister is. Teddy gives them his number for a gift. Swagger comes in after they leave and wants to know what Teddy is going to do after Henry hit him with a chair on Friday. Teddy isn’t going to do anything about it and asks Jack to sit on his lap. Sheamus comes in and I think I know where this is going. The Great White (seriously, what is up with that name?) has some Irish humor for Swagger and yep, Teddy makes the match.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

I have no idea if this match was announced or not. This is about the Slammys or something like that. Kelly takes over to start and I kind of wonder why she isn’t Alicia, as in the girl that’s been pushed lately. There’s the screaming headscissors but she gets caught in a gorilla press. Beth works on the back and tries a bunch of covers for two. She goes up and misses a guillotine legdrop. K2 is countered and they botch the backflip. Glam Slam into the rollup is countered so Beth wins with something like an electric chair at 5:14.

Rating: D. I don’t get why this division exists. The girls aren’t that good, not many people care about them, and the only thing about Kelly that matters is she looks good in tiny gold shorts. Ok she looks good in any color shorts. The matches sucked as usual and I don’t think anyone is surprised at that. Just go back to the swimsuit contests already.

Del Rio yells at Ricardo for not having the car or the food ready. Miz comes up and says the alliance is over after this show. Del Rio says it wasn’t really an alliance in the first place. They argue over legacies and Del Rio calls him a stupid little boy. Ricardo comes up with something for Del Rio to eat and it winds up in his face.

Ad for the Rumble, which features Santino as a psychic.

Booker comes out for the IC Title match and Cody jumps him again. His head hit the barricade as Cody jumped him. Booker is ticked.

We recap HHH vs. Nash. This is about Nash getting a pop at the Rumble (11 months ago) but HHH wouldn’t bring him back in. Nash did it himself and then beat up HHH.

HHH vs. Kevin Nash

This is the sledgehammer ladder match. They pound on each other to start with the power moves and head to the floor. HHH gets a ladder but gets kicked into it. Nash sets one up on the floor but HHH dives off the announce table with a clothesline to take over. Nash into the crowd now but he gets an elbow up to a charging Game. Snake Eyes onto the barricade puts HHH down and there’s a one man Vinnie Vegas chant.

They head into the ring and HHH takes over, using the ladder onto the knees. Now some of the weakest ladder shots ever onto said knee. HHH wraps the ladder around Nash’s legs and hooks a Figure Four in it. It’s better than the one around the post at least. Nash manages to whip HHH into the ladder and out to the floor in a solid bump. Side slam onto the ladder and HHH is in trouble.

Nash puts the ladder onto the bottom rope and does the slingshot into it instead of the rope. And then the crowd goes silent for a bit. Out to the floor and Nash sets for the Jackknife through the table, but HHH backdrops him onto said table instead. HHH makes the first climb up the ladder, 13 minutes into the match. He just gets a hand on it as Nash makes the save. Remember that you have to get a pin after getting it down.

There’s a chokeslam of all things and Nash goes to the floor again. He sets up a table in the ring and there goes the strap. HHH kind of spears him into the ladder and knocks him to the floor. The Game goes up but Nash is back and they slug it out on the ladder. HHH knocks the hammer into Nash’s head and Nash actually goes off the ladder through the table. I didn’t think he had it in him.

HHH gets the hammer down and Nash is on his feet a minute after falling that far. HHH destroys Nash with the hammer but Nash is back to his knees in a minute. The first Pedigree attempt doesn’t work and the second doesn’t actually involve Nash’s face touching the mat. We’re still not done yet though as Nash is on his knees again less than a mintue later. HHH gets the hammer and Nash flashes the Kliq sign. A hammer shot ends this at 18:12.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t that bad, but at the end of the day is Kevin Nash vs. HHH getting 18 minutes and we’re less than two weeks from the year 2012. Also the completely absurd lack of selling at the end of this really hurt things. Nash is painfully slow but I think everyone knew that was coming. Not as bad as it was expected to be, but I still don’t see why this needed to happen.

Nash goes out on a stretcher.

Punk says the beating on Monday was painful but it wasn’t as painful as Ace taking his Slammy. Ace pops up and says he mailed the Slammy to him. They trade some verbal jabs and that’s about it.

Jack Swagger vs. Sheamus

Sheamus hammers him down to start as we hear about his career as an IT guy. All Sheamus so far. Vickie yells at him so Jack can ram him into the post and then the barricade. Vader Bomb gets two in the ring. Sheamus fires back but can’t get much going. Swagger goes after the leg a bit and hooks the ankle lock. When that doesn’t work, the Brogue Kick ends this at 5:55.

Rating: D+. It’s just a first hour TV main event but it’s bonus PPV wrestling so it’s hard to complain here. They needed something to flesh out this card and it’s good to put Sheamus out there and get him some camera time. He’s probably next in line for Henry so you can’t really complain here. Pretty dull match but nothing unwatchable.

Show says he’ll win.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Mark Henry

It’s a chairs match, meaning they’re legal. Show’s singlet is now camo. Show immediately goes to the floor and throws in like ten chairs. Him just casually tossing them about ten feet in the air is scary impressive. They both have chairs now but Henry drops his and gets out. He grabs the title and says this isn’t happening. Show goes after him and ducks a title shot so he can wear Henry out with chair shots.

They start slugging it out and Henry cracks him with a chair. Henry goes after the hand so that Show can’t use his two finishers. Show tries to come back but his hand is worthless. Henry makes a pile of chairs but the Slam is broken up. He goes for a chair shot but Show fires off the big punch. AND IT GETS THE PIN AT 5:35????? REALLY?????

Rating: C. Call me crazy but I liked it. There’s something cool about two guys just going off on each other with chair shots. This worked pretty well for what it was and keeping it short was the right idea. The important thing is coming though so I’m cutting this short.

Post match Henry hits him with a DDT on the chairs AND HERE’S BRYAN!!! HE WINS THE TITLE!!!!! Cole is STUNNED. Bryan Danielson and CM Punk are currently the world champions in WWE and might be at Wrestlemania. Let that sink in for a bit.

Booker says he’s going to try to compete tonight and he looks MAD.

Intercontinental Title: Booker T vs. Cody Rhodes

Cody hammers him down to start but Booker hits a side kick and sends Cody to the floor. As they head back in, Cody gets in a shot to put Booker down. Pretty boring stuff here as they know the fans are all catching their breath at once. A double clothesline puts them both down and they slug it out a bit. Cody winds up holding onto the bottom rope and we get a Spinarooni. It makes him dizzy and the scissors kick misses. Side kick misses and the Beautiful Disaster gets two. Another one ends this at 7:15.

Rating: D+. Like I said not much here, but this was all about filling in time before the main event. They would have been better suited having Sheamus vs. Swagger here, but the match wasn’t bad or anything. Cody wins as he should have and he gets a little more validation with a win over a big name. If that’s it for Booker, there’s not much to complain about here.

They actually recap the show up to this point.

Raw World Title: Miz vs. CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

TLC match. The heels jump Punk to start but Punk fights them off. Lawler thinks there are pins in this but Cole actually saves him, saying that Lawler is confused because this match has never happened before. He wasn’t rude about it either. Punk gets double teamed and they slowly go to the floor since they don’t trust each other. Miz goes after Ricardo so Del Rio hits him with a chair.

Punk dives out onto Del Rio to take over and it’s him vs. Miz in the ring. Punk tries the bulldog onto the chair but Miz counters into a belly to back onto the unfolded chair. Miz goes for a ladder but Del Rio stops him, sending him into the ladder. Everyone goes to the floor now and Miz swings a chair but hits the post. Punk wears him out with that chair and Del Rio is down from a chair shot as well.

Punk puts Miz on the railing and hits the running knee, using a chair as a springboard. He sets the ladder up in the ring but Ricardo runs in and handcuffs Punk to the ladder. That’s a new one. Del Rio hammers him down but the shots break the cuffs and Punk is free. Miz gets what appears to be a huge ladder and beats Punk down with it. He gets a hand on the belt but Punk saves.

They go to the corner and Del Rio hits the running enziguri to knock Punk to the floor and through a table. Del Rio throws a miniladder at Miz in the aisle and does the cross armbreaker with the ladder deal to Miz. He goes back to Punk and does the same but with a chair. He goes up but both guys make the save and crotch him on the top rope. Ricardo goes up and Punk knocks him off the top through a table on the floor.

Miz manages to cuff Punk to the ropes and the champ panics. Miz of course taunts him instead of going up and Punk fires off a kick to the head. Del Rio has a ladder up and Punk tries to kick the ring apart. Miz has a bigger ladder as Punk continues his straightedge tool work. Eventually he gets free and Punk destroys them all. Miz makes the save and I really thought that was it. GTS to Miz and that’s enough for Punk to retain at 18:25.

Rating: B. This was about what you would expect from a triple threat TLC match. It wasn’t anything classic but it was entertaining enough and that’s the whole point of it. The handcuffs didn’t really play into things that well but they were trying something new out there and I’ll give them points for that. Not a classic or anything but I’ve certainly seen worse.

Overall Rating: B. This was certainly a good show but it had some weak parts. The HHH vs. Nash match is a lot more acceptable if it ENDS the feud and I mean forever. A lot happened here and I think their idea was to throw so much stuff at us so fast that we couldn’t really tell if it was good or not. Overall it was good, but I didn’t have as much fun with it as others probably did. Still fun though and a nice surprise, but it’ll tank in buyrates and all of the booking will be blamed.

Results
Zack Ryder b. Dolph Ziggler – Rough Ryder
Air Boom b. Primo/Epico – Trouble in Paradise to Primo
Randy Orton b. Wade Barrett – Orton put Barrett through a table
Beth Phoenix b. Kelly Kelly – Electric Chair
HHH b. Kevin Nash – Pedigree
Big Show b. Mark Henry – WMD
Daniel Bryan b. Big Show – Pin after a DDT onto a pile of chairs
Cody Rhodes b. Booker T – Beautiful Disaster
CM Punk b. The Miz and Alberto Del Rio – Punk pulled down the title

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Smackdown
Date: December 9, 2011
Location: Jacksonville Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

We’re back to Fridays again after what I thought was a very good holiday show. It seems I was in the minority on that but that tends to be the case most of the time with this show. It should be another decent one as we close in on both TLC as well as the end of the year. I don’t remember any matches being announced but that’s not to abnormal. Let’s get to it.

We open with Booker T down near the entrance. Cody Rhodes is standing near him and we get a clip from before the show went on the air of Booker getting beaten down by Cody. I guess we’ll be having a two man commentary team tonight.

Lillian Garcia is back and I think I’d rather look at her than Chimmel. Cody cuts her off and says no one cares that she’s back and no one noticed that she left. It matches the departure of one Booker T. He hopes that he made his message clear tonight. Cody is going to take Booker’s place tonight (Cody: “Who else is going to talk about a Fave Five with eleven people in it?”).

There are tables, ladders and chairs all around ringside. I mean in addition to the usual chairs that are around ringside in the audience that is.

Tonight there’s going to be a Beat the Clock Challenge between Barrett and Orton. The idea is both of them will have a match and both will be timed. Whoever wins their match in the fastest time will get to pick the kind of match they have at TLC: tables, ladders or chairs.

Wade Barrett vs. Ezekiel Jackson

If Jackson wins here then all Orton has to do is win his match later. He takes over to start as Cody talks about how awesome he is. Barrett hits a front legged chopblock and sends Jackson shoulder first into the post. His hair is all wild again so you know he means business. Cole and Cody suck each other off a bit as Barrett takes over with his usual stuff like the pumphandle.

We take a break and come back with Barrett holding a chinlock. It’s nice having that clock there to keep time for me. Jackson breaks the hold and fires back with clotheslines in the corner and Barrett is covering up. Here come the slams but Barrett escapes the Rack. Wasteland can’t hit but the Bossman Slam ends this at 7:53. That was refreshing to see: a secondary move ending a match.

Rating: C-. Not a great match or anything but I almost always enjoy Barrett’s in ring work. He uses some stuff that isn’t very common but it’s nothing that makes him look too over the top. More people could easily do this and I have no idea why they don’t. Jackson is a guy I don’t see being around that often as he’s pretty just just a jobber to the stars anymore, which is about where you would expect him.

Barrett says Orton is the only thing standing in his way of the world title, and that doesn’t mean anything as he’s inside Orton’s head as opposed to Orton being in everyone else’s head. The voice in Barrett’s head is saying Orton is out of time.

Show vs. Henry is officially a chairs match, which is the only match that really makes sense for them.

Otunga complains about being in the street fight last week because he’s part of the Raw roster. Otunga tells Teddy that the loss should be expunged from his record. Teddy agrees but says that Otunga is subject to the whim of the authority figure. Since Otunga is here tonight, he’s going to compete against someone Teddy has been looking for an opponent for: Sheamus.

Josh is in the ring and brings out Daniel Bryan. His ribs are taped up due to the cage match last week. He says he’s very sore but what hurt worse was the disappointment of letting everyone down. Everything he had ever wanted was right in front of him and he let it slip away. Cole cuts him off as he starts to tell a story about his dad and goes on a rant about how Bryan never earned anything. Bryan points at Cody and says he made him tap to earn his shot. Cole says Bryan should go away so here comes Bryan after Cole. Cody blasts Bryan and referees break it up. Cole working with Cody? I’m not sure how I feel about that.

After a break, Cody vs. Bryan is announced for later.

Zack Ryder vs. Heath Slater

Remember the bad reaction Ryder got Monday? It’s made up for here. No entrance for Slater. Ok so a lot of that is canned but there was definitely a reaction for him. Slater takes him down for a few seconds but the Broski Boot and Rough Ryder end this at 1:25.

Ted DiBiase vs. Jinder Mahal

Thank goodness this isn’t on PPV. Cole freaks out over the DiBiase Posse thing. Mahal dominates to start and there’s no Cody anymore on commentary which I forgot to mention. You can always tell when the crowd doesn’t care because you can hear the referee talking. The jingoistic fans chant USA while Cole doesn’t want to talk because he’s mad at Matthews for some reason or another. Mahal hits some jumping knees to the face and then gets rolled up for the pin at 2:54. This was REALLY bad.

We get a clip from some music awards where Big Show chokeslammed country singer Trace Adkins through a table.

After a break Big Show is in the ring. He talks about how nine years ago, he beat Brock Lesnar in Madison Square Garden for the WWE Title. People said that was impossible but he did it. He thinks nine years is long enough time for him to do the impossible again and beat Mark Henry for the title. With all the chairs they’ll have around the ring and the people in there, the physics say it has to get mean and nasty. At TLC, the Hall of Pain gets closed.

Here’s Henry who says he’s half hurt. His ankle is still hurt but he didn’t tape it so he’s not looking for a fight. He yells at a fan to shut up so the fans chant at him to shut up. Henry wants to say something to Show’s face but wants a promise that Show won’t put his hands on him. Show thinks about it really hard and says no. Henry seems to be trying to get out of the match by saying that it won’t mean anything if Show beats an injured man. He asks for the courtesy of Show not putting his hands on him if he gets in. Show finally relents and Henry gets in.

Henry gets in and says he’s the champion. In two weeks at TLC he should be 100%. Then why did he bring up the beating an injured man thing earlier? Henry says people will talk about this fight for decades. Mark asks to let bygones be bygones and may the best man win. He extends his hand which Show shakes reluctantly. Henry goes to leave but stops. He says Show thinks he’s (Show) a monster. Show just thinks it, but Henry really is and the fight is on. Show drops an elbow on the leg and Henry bails so Show goes after him. He gets a chair and cracks Henry in the back and leg with it.

Sheamus vs. David Otunga

Hornswoggle is the guest ring announcer. Josh asks a great question: if Otunga is so smart, why does he keep coming here and talking himself into situations he can’t get out of? I love stupid heels. Otunga is officially Johnny Ace’s assistant. Otunga tries to take him down early and Sheamus is like “no boyo.” He powers David around and hits the ten forearms to the chest. Otunga gets in the required jobber offense and Sheamus does the freaky eyed smile. Powerslam and Brogue Kick end this at 2:57. Just a squash.

Horny and Sheamus celebrate and we cut to the Second Coming video.

Daniel Bryan vs. Cody Rhodes

The video is ignored again. Bryan fires off kicks to start but Cody breaks it up with an elbow to the ribs. A release gordbuster gets two. Why is it so hard for people to focus on an injured body part? If you were in a real fight and you saw someone with a bunch of bandages around a body part, where would you aim? Cole goes on another rant and again it makes me roll my eyes.

Bryan gets knocked to the floor into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Cody holding Bryan in an abdominal stretch. Cody starts ripping the tape off and Cole talks about fearing for his personal safety earlier. Bryan sends him to the floor and tries the suicide dive, which really is just him shoving Cody out of the way. Bryan crashes into the barricade again with much more impact than Cody’s landing had. Cole, correctly this time, calls Rhodes an idiot.

Rhodes gets back in but Bryan is getting fired up on the floor. Here come the kicks. Why would you get on your knees in a match with Daniel Bryan? It’s just not going to end well for you no matter what you do. A running dropkick in the corner sets up a top rope splash attempt but Rhodes moves, sending the bad ribs into the mat again. And here’s Booker for the DQ at 5:56 shown of 9:26.

Rating: C. This was getting good by the end and I wanted to see where it was going. The ending makes sense but it’s kind of a disappointment. However, it was the right way to go as Bryan is getting pushed hard now and you don’t want the IC Champion to lose either, so having it go this way is the right call. Decent match, disappointing (though understandable) ending.

Booker gets the better of the brawl and Cody runs.

Aksana and Teddy are in the back when Cody interferes. He wants a match with Booker so Teddy makes it for TLC for the title. It’s about time he defended the thing. Aksana stares at Cody as he leaves.

Orton says if you want to know his thoughts, ask Barrett. He’s thinking that Barrett did Ziggler (Orton’s opponent tonight) a favor because Orton won’t be able to make the suffering last as long as he usually does. He says he has Barrett exactly where he wants him.

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

This is strange. I read the spoilers for this show and there was a Divas tag taped for it and there’s no sign of it anywhere here. The show is about as long as it usually is and there’s nothing to indicate that anything is missing. I had heard that the Australian broadcast of the show had the post match angle of it cut but the entire match is missing here. Strange indeed. Then again they’re the Divas so who cares?

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

Orton has to win in under 7:53. No Swagger with Dolph here. Orton hits a pair of dropkicks and gets three near falls in the first thirty seconds. Dolph stomps away in the corner but Randy stops him cold, hitting the knee drop for two. Six minutes left. Ziggler kicks him in the knee and hits a Fameasser for two. Off to something like a cobra clutch with five minutes left.

A DDT gets two as Dolph is going slowly here, which is perfectly fine for the thinking of this match. Back to a chinlock with four minutes to go. Neckbreaker for two and the clock is running down. Ziggler takes forever getting up top and is crotched with three minutes left. A big superplex by Orton gets two. With a little over two minutes to go Orton starts his finishing sequence.

Two minutes left and Orton hits the backbreaker. Ziggler tries to run but gets caught in the Elevated DDT for two with 70 seconds left. Dolph rolls to the floor and Barrett slips behind Orton and sends him into the post with about 40 seconds left. Orton is outside with 15 seconds to go. And the RKO hits for the pin at 7:51 and two seconds left.

Rating: C-. Really didn’t like this one because of the time thing. It hurts a lot when you know the match isn’t going to break eight minutes and we’re all just waiting on the RKO to hit with about 8 seconds left. It’s not horrible but when you get used to these two stealing the show, this is really pretty disappointing by comparison.

Post match Barrett beats Orton down some more and says he has a suggestion for the match. He sets up Wasteland through a table but Orton escapes. Barrett runs and Orton makes it a table match. Ziggler goes through it instead.

Overall Rating: C. I really wasn’t feeling this one tonight. A lot got added to the PPV but it felt like they were doing this blindfolded. I can’t put my finger on it but things felt like they were off by a step all night. It’s not a bad show, but this is definitely one of their weaker entries in a very long time. Like I said though, a lot was added to the PPV and that’s what counts. I just wish getting there had been a little better.

Results
Wade Barrett b. Ezekiel Jackson – Bossman Slam
Zack Ryder b. Heath Slater – Rough Ryder
Ted DiBiase b. Jinder Mahal – Small Package
Sheamus b. David Otunga – Brogue Kick
Cody Rhodes b. Daniel Bryan via disqualification when Booker T interfered
Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler – RKO

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Smackdown
Date: November 29, 2011
Location: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

This is a special edition of the show as it’s airing live on Tuesday. Also it’s the holiday episode, which I think is a catch all for Thanksgiving and Christmas, which is next month but whatever. Foley is the host for the evening and we have a world title match in a cage with Henry vs. Bryan. Let’s get to it.

The show opens with fake snow and Josh saying there was a snow storm that started a few seconds ago.

Here’s Foley. There’s a Christmas set. Aren’t they pulling this out a little early? I mean we have Christmas music, Foley in a Santa suit, Christmas lights at the table and all that jazz. He points out that it’s still November but he’s a Christmas fanatic. What Good Old JR is to barbecue sauce and what the Ultimate Warrior is to arm tassels, he is to Christmas. For us tonight, we have a world title match between Tiny Tim and the Ghost of Christmas Fear inside a steel cage. There’s also a miracle on 34th street fight, an over the top rope battle royal where the winner gets their Christmas wish granted…and Michael Cole.

Foley can’t get around the contract and Cole’s legal team, but he can pick how Cole has to dress. Cue Cole in a Rudolph costume. Josh is in an elf outfit so he can’t complain much. Foley also brings out Booker, who is also in a Santa outfit. Foley asks for a Spinarooni to make up for This is your Life from a few weeks ago. It’s set to the Dradle Song because they both spin. The hat comes off but the fans cheer for it so all is well.

Cue Cody all in white. Well mostly in white. He says that he’s seeing clearly now and says that he’s not going to let someone take up the time when that person can’t perform in the ring anymore. Booker says he can still go and calls Cody son. Foley cuts Cody off and makes Booker vs. Cody for later. No word on if this is for the title or not. First up, let’s have a Divas match.

Alicia Fox vs. Brie Bella vs. Nikki Bella vs. Natalya vs. Kaitlyn vs. AJ vs. Tamina vs. Aksana

This is a mistletoe on a pole match, which means you have to climb up and get the mistletoe. The winner gets something they can cash in before Christmas. Brie wins at 57 seconds after climbing on Nikki. I have no idea if I got all the competitors or not, not do I care.

Foley says Brie gets to kiss any superstar she wants before Christmas. Ok then.

Justin Gabriel vs. Jinder Mahal

Mahal runs down Christmas before the show starts. We hear about how Mahal has hates DiBiase for giving away all his money. Cue DiBiase in a Santa hat with a bag. He throws out WWE gifts to fans. The distraction lets Gabriel hit an STO and the 450 for the pin at 2:15.

Foley is learning the Siva Tao from the Usos when Piper comes up. He wants a new straightjacket for Christmas. Horny and some good looking woman are having egg nog. Dusty Rhodes is here. He offers Horny a picture of Lagy Gaga and something about sandwich. Dusty says there are some strange people here and turns around into Goldust. There’s something awesome about that. Oh the chick is Maxine.

Piper is talking to someone when Otunga comes up with the coffee cup and has an announcement from Johnny Ace. The holiday music has to be in the public domain. Eh we might as well shut the party down now. Foley and Piper are like dude…..you are in WAY over your head. Foley puts Otunga in the street fight tonight against Randy Orton.

We recap Booker vs. Cody. Booker is in the back when Cody jumps him with the belt, injuring his arm.

Kofi Kingston vs. Tyson Kidd

This should be good. Booker vs. Cody is officially off. Tyson has hair now. They start off pretty fast and both guys go down off a double clothesline. Kidd hits the floor to avoid Trouble in Paradise but Kofi hits a dropkick out there anyway. Kofi gets in Cole’s face for some reason and steals the reindeer hat. Kidd gets in a shot and somehow this isn’t a double countout yet. Kofi puts the hat and nose on, finishing with the top rope cross body at 3:33.

Rating: C. Total comedy match and that’s fine. The idea of the reindeer flying to end it was good but we need to get Bourne back already so Kofi can defend the title instead of just holding it. I think he’s due back tomorrow or something so it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. Decent match but with more time it would have been even better.

Kaitlyn tells Horny he should wish to be taller. Teddy and Sheamus are talking and Sheamus asks what the winner of the battle royal (20 man) gets. Teddy doesn’t know but whatever it is, it’ll be worth it. Cue Aksana who has mistletoe with her. And Aksana eats it instead of kissing Teddy.

Randy Orton vs. David Otunga

This is a street fight. There are a bunch of Christmas trees at ringside as well as presents that slide around the floor. Otunga is in red shorts now instead of his normal trunks. Randy throws him into a bunch of trees and then the announce table. There’s a tray of cookies there so Orton has a bite, gives a face as if to say not bad, then smacks Otunga with the tray.

He grabs a wreath off the post, shouts HO HO HO in Otunga’s face (legit made me laugh) and sends him into the steps. Otunga goes under the ring and finds a kendo stick made to look like a candy cane. Orton takes him down though and beats Otunga with it as Otunga runs. Orton picks up a present and chucks it at David’s head to knock him down.

They go up the stage and Otunga goes into the big tree. There’s an elevated DDT to the floor but Barrett runs out for the beatdown. It would have helped a lot had Orton not looked over his shoulder just before the DDT. The big boot he takes Orton down with gets two and Otunga’s time is measured in seconds. There’s the finishing sequence and the RKO ends this at 7:38.

Rating: C+. This was meant to be a totally fun match and that’s all it was ever supposed to be. Barrett running in even advances the storyline a bit and it helped things somewhat. I had a very good time with this but I’m a total Christmas geek so I’m about as biased as you can be here. Fun match and it worked all around.

Henry is getting taped up and Teddy comes in. Mark yells at him and says he’ll take his anger out on Bryan.

Battle Royal

There are twenty people in this and I’ll let you figure out who all is in it yourselves. I see Mahal, Slater, the Usos, Jackson, Sheamus, O’Neil, Watson, DiBiase, Hunico, Reks, Gabriel, Kidd and Horny. Sheamus is by far the biggest name in this. Hawkins and Young are in there. Young is out quickly as is I think Jey Uso. JTG is in this and as soon as I say this he’s eliminated. DiBiase and Gabriel try to get Hawkins out but can’t quite do it. Kofi and Yoshi Tatsu are in this and I think that’s everyone.

There goes Hawkins at the hands of Big Zeke. We get the showdown with Jackson and Sheamus with with pale One beating him down. Jackson sets for a big clotheline but Sheamus ducks to put him out. Johnny Curtis was the 20th guy in there and Sheamus puts him out easily. Kofi puts out the other Uso but Kidd dropkicks Kingston out seconds later.

Tatsu is gone and Kidd skins the cat and pulls out DiBiase at the same time. Horny slips out from the floor and pulls Kidd out. We take a break with about 8 people left. Back with eight people left: O’Neil, Hunico, Gabriel, Mahal, Reks, Sheamus, Slater and Horny. Gabriel tries to jump on the apron but Mahal knocks him to the floor. Clash of the Titus puts Reks down but he barks too much and Sheamus puts him out. Dang it I wanted him to wish for NXT to end.

Slater and Mahal jump Sheamus but he explodes and beats everyone down. Everyone goes to the floor through the ropes and beats Sheamus down. No one is in the ring at the moment. Ok so now everyone but Sheamus is in. It’s Mahal, Hunico, Slater and Reks. Mahal says we need to go find Horny. They all pick a side of the ring and dive under the ring. Mahal catches him and it’s 4-1. Slater shoves him down as does Hunico.

They all carefully stomp him but before the toss him Sheamus is back in. There goes Reks and Hucio is out as well. Mahal is out and a Brogue Kick puts Slater down. Ok so it’s Horny vs. Sheamus. Oh good grief. Horny says bring it on and Sheamus isn’t sure what to say. He tells Horny to get out but Horny tells him to get out. He kicks Sheamus in the shins but Sheamus grabs him by the beard and starts putting him out but Horny grabs the top rope. Sheamus gets on the apron and detatches him but Horny won’t get off the apron. Sheamus tries to talk to him and they hug, but Horny shoves him off for the win at 13:25.

Rating: C+. This was fun until the end, when it just got stupid. Why in the world would have put Horny over here for the sake of a comedy bit? Well at least this is for an obscure prize instead of something like a title shot so it could be a lot worse. Ok maybe not a lot worse but it could be worse.

Sheamus teases anger but smiles and Horny celebrates.

Ricardo hits on the Bellas at the party as Piper talks to Dusty. They’re talking about Cena and Dusty thinks it’s ridiculous to think the fans are going to get to Cena. Santa comes up and sits down for Horny to ask for his wish. There’s something about celery, Jonas Salk, Peter Falk and chalk. Foley has it wrong and it’s that Horny wants to TALK. They hug and Horny can speak. He goes around using his new powers and calls Vickie a grandma. Foley pops up in a Cactus Jack shirt and Santa is gone. Piper and Dream have no idea what’s going on and I don’t really want the answer.

AJ comes up to wish Bryan luck. Bryan tells Striker he’s ready.

The cage is lowered.

The Slammys are in two weeks.

Smackdown World Title: Mark Henry vs. Daniel Bryan

We even get big match intros. The winner gets Big Show at TLC. Bryan runs for the corner almost immediately. You can win by pin, submission or escape. Bryan keeps trying to run and avoid corners. He wisely goes for the bad leg so Henry throws him into the cage. He splashes Bryan against the wall and we take a break. Back with Henry still dominating. We get a clip from during the break with Henry pulling Bryan back and in essence sling shotting him into the cage.

Time for a nerve hold to waste some time. Bryan fires off a dropkick but Henry kills him with a clothesline. The leg is wearing out though as he kind of falls into the cover for two. Bryan wakes up and goes crazy on the ankle, getting Henry down on the mat and screaming in pain. Bryan climbs but Henry makes the catch, crotching Bryan on the ropes. Henry goes for the door but Bryan grabs the ankle again. Bryan fires off a dropkick to the knee and hooks the LeBell Lock but Henry powers out of it.

Off to an ankle lock and the place is really getting into this. Henry kicks Bryan off but he can’t get up to follow up on it. The challenger goes up but gets his tights partially pulled down. Now Henry goes up but Bryan follows him. He gets over the top but Henry grabs the arm and pulls him back in. There’s some good drama in this. Henry tries a powerbomb out of the corner but Bryan climbs over the top. Henry pulls him back in again and headbutts him into the World’s Strongest Slam from the top. And that takes care of Bryan at 11:15.

Rating: B. Good main event here and the drama towards the end was solid. I don’t think anyone had any realistic reason to believe that Bryan was going to win and they shouldn’t have. He’s a midcard guy getting his first chance in there with the big boys and he’s not ready for the title yet. Still though, very solid main event and Henry gets a win that he’s been lacking recently.

Overall Rating: A-. WWE is on a ROLL right now with their TV shows. Last night was great and tonight was as well. The idea that seems to work for them is to not linger on stuff too long and most importantly, not go back to things over and over again. This show was fine with all of its holiday themes and I liked it a lot. It could have been better, but if they were hoping to show that Smackdown can work live, they nailed it here. Good stuff again.

Results
Brie Bella won a Mistletoe On A Pole Match
Justin Gabriel b. Jinder Mahal – 450 Splash
Kofi Kingston b. Tyson Kidd – Top Rope Cross Body
Randy Orton b. David Otunga – RKO
Hornswoggle won a battle royal last eliminating Sheamus
Mark Henry b. Daniel Bryan – World’s Strongest Slam from the middle rope

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Smackdown
Date: November 4, 2011
Location: BI-LO Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

I’m not sure what we’re going to have tonight as we’re on the road to MSG and Survivor Series but nothing has really been announced. I’m pretty sure you can pencil in Show vs. Henry II so maybe that gets announced tonight. Other than that though the card is pretty blank on the Blue show so maybe we get a little something tonight. Let’s get to it.

Do you know your enemy? Mine is a short little woman that can’t stay out of people’s business and happens to be my boss.

Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton

This is a street fight. Cole talks about how this is going to put the rivalry to an end so I guess this is the official blowoff. The crowd sounds very hot tonight. I guess they got a better audio inputer. The white belt on the crazy man champion is a nice touch. Cody is looking extra jacked tonight. Feeling out process to start until Orton takes over with a headlock. A dropkick sends Cody to the floor.

The brawl heads outside and Cody is getting intense. There’s a knee drop to the Viper and it gets two back inside. Orton is getting all fired up and slams Cody into the steps twice. A clothesline takes us into the crowd as this is looking to be a pretty good fight. Orton hammers away and sends Rhodes into a wall of some kind. One of the baggers gets backdropped and the other takes an RKO. Rhodes cowers on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Randy hammering on Cody on the ramp. Rhodes starts firing back and sets to suplex Randy off the stage. Wouldn’t that pull Cody with him? Randy counters with one of his own onto the steel and pounds down on Cody in the aisle. Back to the ring and Orton brings him in with a superplex. A delayed cover gets two. Both guys get up slowly and Rhodes gets a dropkick for two.

They hit the floor again and Rhodes is all ticked off. Cody charges at Orton but gets backdropped onto the timekeeper. Randy walks into a mask shot to put him down and we take another break. Back with Randy being thrown over the announce table as Cody is all fired up. Good heat for Rhodes as he goes to an armbar. Well it works the shoulder so it makes sense on Orton.

Orton keeps trying to fight back but Cody keeps pouring it on. Rhodes works on the knee and hooks of a Figure Four which is pretty smart. He takes the mask off and drills Orton in the head with it. Counting commercials this match has been going over 20 minutes now so this is one of the longer TV matches in awhile. Orton grabs the mask and drills Cody with it before loading up the RKO.

Cody shoves him off and drills the Beautiful Disaster. This has been an awesome match so far. Cross Rhodes is countered into a backdrop but the elevated DDT is countered as well. They head over the to barricade and Cody gets draped over them. The elevated DDT hits, but this time it’s outside on the floor. Rhodes is DONE. The bonus RKO ends this at 15:56 shown of 22:56.

Rating: B+. Very solid TV match here with Rhodes getting closer than ever to beating Randy. I can understand not putting Rhodes over and at least the loss is to someone clearly higher up on the food chain than him. Randy has a lot better resume when they take the rules away and when the matches are longer with this and his matches against Christian being good examples. Fun match and I was into it by the end.

In a nice cap to the feud, Randy bags Cody. Orton takes the mask with him.

Too long recap of HHH vs. Nash, who is now re-signed. Wasn’t he signed already?

Ted DiBiase vs. Tyson Kidd

Dibiase takes over to start but that doesn’t last long at all. Cole managed to go almost 40 minutes without making fun of Booker and he falls just short of it. The match is completely ignored as we argue over who has the most Twitter followers. Dream Street is countered once but the second attempt ends this at 2:06. Pretty much just a step above a squash.

Mark Henry says he’s tired of answering questions about Vengeance. Henry walks away and finds Daniel Bryan. He accuses Bryan of thinking of cashing in tonight but Bryan insists he’s waiting until Wrestlemania. Henry says it doesn’t matter how long Bryan waits. He’s going to go find Teddy Long and make a match between them tonight. That gets a pop from the crowd.

Alicia Fox vs. Natalya

this is supposed to be retribution for the Halloween battle royal or something like that. Alicia tries early on but Natalya is too much for her. Natalya: “You stuck your nose where it doesn’t belong!” Alicia: “THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH MY NOSE!!!” Natalya was choking her at the time so Alicia’s priorities are a bit out of whack. Speaking of out of, out of nowhere Alicia hits a scissors kick for the pin at 1:24. So she’s the flavor of the month now.

Here’s Big Show who says he’d rather fight than talk. He has unfinished business with Mark Henry and therefore, until he gets his rematch, he’s going to knock Henry out on every Smackdown. Cue Christian who says Show wants one more match. Christian however deserves one more shot because he’s gotten screwed over and over. Show has his hand by his head but says he’s scratching his head. For some reason Christian goes at him and there’s a chokeslam for you. He has a match with Sheamus next too.

After a break Sheamus is here but Christian is too hurt to go. Cue Barrett who says he’ll be a replacement.

Wade Barrett vs. Sheamus

Works for me. This is going to be a power brawl which is almost always fun. They slug it out to start and both guys has a brief advantage through their power games in the opening minute and a half. Sheamus hits the forearms to the chest and the slingshot shoulder for two. Barrett takes over and hits a big boot to send Sheamus out to the floor. That’s not something you see all that often but it happened here.

After a break Christian is still outside selling the chokeslam. Barrett has a bow and arrow hold on Sheamus but the very pale one is fighting out of it. A middle rope elbow gets two. Back to another chinlock as this has been mostly Barrett. Sheamus fires back but can’t hook the High Cross. The fans are split as Sheamus fights up. This would have made better sense next week when the show was in England but Barrett will be a face then. Here’s another High Cross attempt but Christian pops up as a distraction, letting Wade roll him up for the pin at 7:27 shown of 10:57.

Rating: C+. Pretty fun match here as the power brawls are always worth seeing. Barrett’s push continues and I’d love to see him challenge whoever is the face champion after Henry loses it. These two usually have entertaining matches when they pound on each other with reckless abandon and it worked here.

Sheamus is MAD post match following a spear from Christian.

Post break Sheamus is destroying Christian in the back until Barrett comes up for the save. Sheamus beats him up as well. This is probably build for the Survivor Series match.

The Muppets were on Raw and it’s still awesome.

Bryan is in the back (pop) when Show comes in (BIG pop) saying that he’ll be in Bryan’s corner tonight.

Sin Cara vs. Epico

Epico is a Mexican guy that I don’t recognize but is probably out of FCW. Pretty speedy start as you would expect until the Mexican hits a German on the Mexican to take over. There’s a Gory Special but Cara escapes and speeds things up. Cara goes up for the Swanton but here’s Hunico for the DQ at 2:17.

The double beatdown continues post match and Cara is left laying.

Daniel Bryan vs. Mark Henry

Non-title here and Big Show is with Bryan. Bryan has a huge beard now. Henry throws Bryan into the air but gets caught in a guillotine choke. It lasts all of 5 seconds but still, it existed. Bryan gets sent to the floor again and Henry squashes his head against the post. He squashes Bryan’s head, not his own. Bryan has had practically no offense so far.

Off to a chinlock but Bryan fires off kicks, including a series to the knee to take him down. In standard giant vs. small man formula though, the fans pop as Bryan knocks him down but after all that Bryan is launched off during the pin. Back to the guillotine but he doesn’t have his hands locked. Henry casually throws Bryan off in a release northern lights suplex. There’s a running splash in the corner. There’s another splash and here’s Show for the DQ with the big right hand at 6:24.

Rating: C-. This was a squash for all intents and purposes. Henry wasn’t breaking a sweat at all here and I think that was the intended idea. By making Bryan look horribly weak at the beginning of this he can grow and look stronger by the end if he wins the title. Nothing that interesting but it also sets up the Show vs. Henry rematch.

Post match Show pours water over Bryan and says cash it in now. Bryan is barely alive so after figuring out what planet he’s on he tries to cash in, but Henry gets up and hits the Slam. The bell never rang so the case is safe. Henry knocks Show out with the case post match and hits the Slam on him as well. Teddy comes out and makes the match for Survivor Series to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Good show tonight with a lot going on. We get a pretty definitive ending to Orton vs. Rhodes, the main event from Smackdown set up, the upper midcard rivalry advanced with Barrett joining Team Christian, the midcard match advanced with Cara vs. the Evil Mexicans, and apparently the start of a moderate DiBiase push. This was old school Smackdown and it worked very well. Good show.

Results
Randy Orton b. Cody Rhodes – RKO
Ted DiBiase b. Tyson Kidd – Dream Street
Alicia Fox b. Natalya – Scissors Kick
Wade Barrett b. Sheamus – Rollup
Sin Cara b. Epico via DQ when Hunico interfered
Mark Henry b. Daniel Bryan via DQ when Big Show interfered

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NXT
Date: August 30, 2011
Host: Matt Striker

It’s the show on the night of the live Smackdown….and it’s a highlight show. This is NXT Graduates, which means that we’re getting highlights of people that have been on NXT rather than any new material. This is EXACTLY what I wanted as this show KEEPS FERAKING GOING. With this, next week we’ll be at six months of this season. For those of you wondering, yes I do take donations for psychiatric care. Let’s get to it.

So yeah this is going to be Striker narrating kind of like a bad DVD.

We start with Barrett’s promo from last week’s Smackdown saying he won’t fight a jobber.

Video on Brodus Clay.

Time to talk about AJ and we don’t get a clip from her on NXT. We get clips from her on Smackdown! Since I really don’t want to watch these matches again, I’m just copying the reviews from the originals.

Originally aired August 19, 2011 (Smackdown)

Kelly Kelly/AJ vs. Natalya/Alicia Fox

Nattie vs. AJ to start and the cute one (in plaid) is in trouble. Natalya is killing it here as we’re just waiting for the hot tag to Kelly to clean house. AJ finally fights her way to the tag and Kelly does her usual stuff. Alicia misses the axe kick and K2 ends this at 4:30. Just nothing to talk about here.

Rating: C. Eh this was fine all things considered. They’re really pushing Kelly strong as a “wrestler” but it’s not doing anything for me. The girls are almost entirely interchangeable other than Beth and Natalya to a degree. The matches aren’t as bad anymore though which is a nice break.

Video on Justin Gabriel being in South Africa.

Matt talks about his sister thinking Gabriel was gorgeous.

Originally aired August 19, 2011 (Smackdown)

Justin Gabriel vs. Tyson Kidd

Well they had a great match on NXT a few weeks ago so I have high hopes here. We get some nice speed stuff to start and Tyson takes over with some shots to the face. Nice dropkick to the back of the head as the announcers are talking about fishing with sharks. A hard elbow gets two. Justin fires off with some kicks which get two. Kidd rolls through a springboard cross body and tries a leg lock but Justin escapes and hits an STO. Justin goes for the 450 and after knocking Kidd off the top the splash ends it at 4:23.

Rating: C+. They’re keeping the matches short tonight but I’m digging them. Justin and Kidd are both getting some solid TV time and the matches are getting better. The little clips from South Africa are nice touches as they’re giving us a reason to care about him which we didn’t have before. Good little TV match here and the 450 is great as always.

Well sure they picked that one. Why pick the really good one from NXT?

Video on Alex Riley.

Originally aired July 17, 2011 (Money in the Bank 2011)

The version they show is clipped but this is the full review.

Sin Cara vs. Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater vs. Sheamus vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Wade Barrett vs. Kane vs. Daniel Bryan

This is going to be a big insane match so it’s almost impossible to call what’s going on in these things. I’m really not sure who to predict in this. I went with Cody as a more or less random choice mainly out of a lack of anyone else. Big mess to start as these really should only have six people in them. Kane, Barrett and Sheamus clear the ring out and it’s a three way staredown.

The Europeans….wait Kane is from Spain. Ok the two guys not named Kane go down and it’s ladder time already. Bryan dropkicks Kane down as Slater and Gabriel team up a bit. Cara, who is in white/gray here, gets taken down but the former tag partners fight already. Slater goes for the ladder and is loudly booed. Gabriel goes up but the ladder is way off center. Bryan dropkicks him off but Cody goes up.

Kane sends Sheamus and Cody to the floor but Barrett stops the Big Bald. Kane throws a ladder at Sheamus to take him down. Slater vs. Kane and guess who wins that one. Cara pops up out of nowhere to drill Kane and break up the clothesline. Bryan hits a big dive and Gabriel does the same. Sorry for all the play by play stuff but it’s all you can do in these things for the most part.

Cara is like screw you guys I’m the flier here and takes out Sheamus with a huge one. He follows that up by kicking Bryan in the head and hitting the top rope C4 to take Bryan down. Sin tries to go for the briefcase but can’t pick a ladder up and into the ring. Barrett kicks his head off so it doesn’t matter. They do the whole set up a ladder as a bridge from the ring to the table thing as is customary.

Cara avoids going through it though and Barrett clotheslines the post. For some reason the masked guy goes in again without a ladder and gets his head kicked off by Sheamus. Not a good night for the Mexican dude. Cara gets powerbombed through the ladder to more or less kill him. BIG pop for Sheamus for that one. Sheamus is controlling almost everyone here as Cara is taken out on a stretcher.

Kane and Sheamus are in the ring and fighting over a ladder. Scratch that as all three go to the floor. Bryan, Kane and Cody are all in the ring with ladders now. The small guys work together to take Kane down and there goes that partnership. Cara is gone now, as in out of the entire arena via a stretcher. Kane has the big ladder set up in the ring and everyone comes in. Cody makes an attempt but all the small guys make a save.

The former Nexus triple teams Bryan and then the tag team tells Barrett to go ahead. Barrett proves why British wrestlers are stupid as he goes up and is pulled down just a few seconds later. Both of them go up but Rhodes shoves the ladder down. Cross Rhodes takes someone down and it’s time for Barrett and Rhodes to fight over the ladder. Cross Rhodes takes Barrett out but Sheamus makes the last second save.

There’s an Irish Curse and pasty goes up, only for Bryan to make the save. Bryan rams him into the ladder a few times and goes up at the same time. Sheamus and Kane combine for a Doomsday Device to END Bryan. Kane and Sheamus are alone in the ring now. Well other than a ladder but that doesn’t count I don’t think. The big ladder is in the ring and a regular one is set up as a bridge against the middle buckle.

Kane escapes though and chokeslams various small people. Big Bald goes up but Bryan makes ANOTHER save despite being legally deceased I believe. Bryan goes up and almost gets the LeBell Lock on the ladder. That would be awesome. Bryan manages to knock Kane to the floor but Slater stops him. Bryan saves AGAIN as he’s been insane so far tonight.

Slater goes up one more time but Barrett saves. Time for Barrett vs. Sheamus which doesn’t sound all that appealing. Thankfully they team up and stop Slater, using a ladder like a fork to stop Slater and shove him off the top. That was cool. Sheamus goes nuts and takes out a lot of people so he can climb. Naturally he’s not that smart so he sets up another ladder on the top rope.

Sheamus is just beating people up at the moment and not really trying to go after it. Even Booker is saying GO FOR IT. Ok now he’s going up but Kane pops up from nowhere to stop him. Sheamus has a bridge ladder beneath him. He goes onto it but doesn’t break it. FREAKING OW MAN! Wasteland hits Kane and Gabriel climbs a ladder and hits 450 in the tightest space possible. That was AWESOME.

Bryan and Cody go at it on the ladder as everyone but Barrett is down. Wade comes up as Bryan tries to choke Cody out because he’s an idiot. Cody goes down and Wade takes an elbow to knock him backwards a bit. Bryan is alone up there and Wade is on the bridge. Bryan kicks him down and WINS THE CASE! Totally didn’t see that one coming.

Rating: A. I liked the story telling aspect of this as Bryan was the MVP of this thing.  He made a ton of saves and certainly deserved to win it in the end. The spots in this were great and Cara going out might have been due to prevent him from botching something major, which says a lot.  I’m not sure I can see Bryan winning a title but stranger things have happened.  GREAT match though.

After the Inside Out trailer, we actually TALK ABOUT THE SHOW. It’s a highlight reel about what’s happened on the show over the last 25 weeks or whatever. We get clips of everyone being eliminated and Bateman returning…and that’s it. No word on what’s next, no words on upcoming eliminations, nothing. That’s it. I have never felt like I wasted my time on a show before, but I do now.

Overall Rating: N/A. This wasn’t about NXT but it was a nice breath of air on the surface. That being said though, this was supposed to be about people that used to be on NXT, and the furthest we go back is six weeks? The show has been on for a year and a half and they don’t go past the middle of July? Next week it’ll be six months. I don’t know what to say about that at all. Somehow this was the best show in months though.

Results

Kelly Kelly/AJ b. Alicia Fox/Natalya – K2 to Fox

Justin Gabrile b. Tyson Kidd – 450 Splash

Daniel Bryan won the Smackdown Money in the Bank Case – Bryan pulled down the case

Smackdown
Date: August 26, 2011
Location: Scotiabank Saddledome, Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T

We’re still in Canada and we’re into the Henry as #1 contender era. The main event tonight is him vs. Sheamus in a Summerslam rematch that hopefully is as good as last time. I’m really hoping they don’t end Sheamus’ momentum already but maybe they won’t. Since we’re in Canada there’s also a little surprise in store. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Henry being dominant last week in the battle royal and getting the shot at Orton.

Do you know your enemy? Mine is 4000 miles separating you from someone you want to be with more than anything.

Remember that surprise I mentioned? Bret Hart is here to open the show. Bret says he’s not here tonight so HHH has named him Guest GM for the night. See, THIS is what legends should be doing. Flair would be perfect for something like this. Have a show in Charlotte? Have Flair pop in and be a guest host or a guest referee or something. Bret mentions that Tuesday will be a special live Super Smackdown which is a double branded show.

Bret says he’s looking forward to the main event which will be Henry vs. Orton for the title. That brings out Christian who says he blames his loss at Summerslam on Bret’s friend Edge. Due to Edge doing what he did, Christian couldn’t concentrate and he lost the title. Bret says Christian is getting really whiny, becoming an embarrassment to himself, the world title, the WWE Universe and to Canada. OH NO HE DIDN’T! Christian needs to start at the bottom and work his way back up.

Christian says that guys like Bret and Edge are the real embarrassments because they can’t let it go. He thinks maybe they’re jealous because he’s the only relevant Canadian. Christian pulls out a document saying he gets a title rematch next week on Smackdown. Bret says he does, but it needs to be a special kind of match. The more famous Canadian makes it a steel cage match and Christian isn’t happy.

That brings out Mark Henry and Christian heads to the floor. Henry says he’s tired of this disrespect after 15 years in the company and he earned his title match last week. If he doesn’t get it, someone is going to be hurt. He wants the winner of the cage match and as much as he respects Bret, he can’t be held responsible for what happens if he doesn’t get the shot. Since three people taking 15 minutes to talk hasn’t been enough, here’s Sheamus!

The great white (which is what Cole called him earlier so don’t jump on me) talks about his uncle’s farm and a big black bull there. The bull kept destroying everything in sight so one day his uncle castrated said bull. Sheamus charges and the fight is on! Henry gets knocked to the floor and the staredown finally takes us to a break.

Christian vs. Daniel Bryan

This was set up during the break. As Bryan is coming to the ring we get a quick video package on him. Cole thinks Bryan is planning something and won’t cash in at Mania but rather like everyone else has. It’s a basic match to start as Bryan tries his strikes and Christian tries his usual stuff.

There’s the big dive (the announcers don’t react to it until the replay because they’re talking about how the champion always gets a rematch after losing. Not exactly but who cares about history in this company?) and Bryan hooks a surfboard. Christian escapes the hold though and takes over as we take a break. Back with a chinlock on and the fans are behind Christian as is expected.

Bryan gets a shot in and the missile dropkick out of nowhere for two. So far the count of Booker calling him “D. Bryan, one of my Fave Five” is at three. The pendulum kick is blocked in the corner and Bryan rips off some kicks and a knee to the chest for two. Christian does his stand on the guy’s back while they’re in the 619 position and the uppercut for two.

Spear is countered by a kick but Bryan slips on his moonsault and Christian tries the sunset flip out of the corner. Bryan rolls through and hits the spin kick (with Christian looking stupid for sitting there for two). Top rope rana is countered and Christian (called the Professor by Booker) hooks a tornado DDT for two. Killswitch is countered into a LeBell Lock attempt but the Canadian makes the rope. Out of almost nowhere the Killswitch ends this at 8:08 shown of 11:38.

Rating: B. Another good and long TV match from Smackdown as is their custom. I’ve heard some people saying Bryan is being buried or depushed, but since he’s won the case the worst loss he’s had is to Wade Barret who is hardly a nobody. He’s got (arguably) a better resume than Bryan in WWE at this point and it was a good match. Bryan has had consistently good matches against top level competition and I can’t get why people would think he’s been depushed.

Aksana says watch Super Smackdown.

Wade Barrett vs. ???

It’s a jobber but his name is never given. Barrett grabs the mic and says he’s done a lot and this is an insult because this is beneath him as a man and asking him to face a man such as this is an insult. Barrett walks off and there’s no match.

Raw ReBound eats up some time. It’s about Cena vs. Punk.

Sin Cara vs. Heath Slater

I’m not sure which Cara this is but he’s got some solid abs. It’s now the one man Southern rock band and his music sounds like that a bit as well. Del Rio vs. Sin Cara on Tuesday. Slater goes right after Cara to open things up and the fans aren’t thrilled. We hear about Slater’s background in listening to southern rock. I know the writers are lacking for characters a bit but a guy that listens to music is the best they’ve got? Anyway as the announcers argue a bit Cara hits the big cross body to the floor and the slingshot swanton and the Lionsault end this at 1:42. What the heck was that?

On a side note, from what I understand this match was taped twice because the first time was so horrible it had to be redone because it couldn’t air.

We get a recap of Orton being confronted by Legacy and the RKO to DiBiase before he could get much out at all.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase

Rhodes talks about being a miracle worker and that he’s resurrecting the title, which I hope is true. Basic stuff on the mat to start until Randy takes over. Shoulder block gets two for DiBiase. It’s more or less a standoff and I think they’ll have a decent amount of time to work with here. Orton gets going and stomps away to continue the slow pace of this match. DiBiase gets the following clothesline for two and a pop from the crowd. That Bizarro Land tag is pretty true.

Ted’s dropkick is countered into a slingshot and Orton unleashes his clotheslines. A move that I refuse to call a Thesz Press hits but Cody breaks up the elevated DDT. Randy tries an RKO on the floor on Cody but DiBiase hits a baseball slide to save and we take a break. Back with Orton getting taken down by a dropkick for two. Ted goes up but Orton fires off right hands and gets a superplex for two.

Orton initiates his finishing sequences and might be bleeding from his head a bit. Powerslam sets up the backbreaker but Ted counters the latter into a rollup for two. They’re trying to play up the idea that Ted knows Randy so well that he can counter everything. Dream Street is countered into a European Uppercut and there’s the elevated DDT. RKO attempt is countered into a Dream Street attempt which is reversed. Ted tries another following clothesline but walks into the RKO for the pin at 8:40 shown of 12:10.

Rating: C-. Not a horrible match but I wasn’t feeling it. These two didn’t click and after three months of Christian vs. Orton, it’s kind of hard to get into these two having such an uninteresting match. It wasn’t bad I guess but Orton needs the right guy to bring him out of his boring area and DiBiase isn’t that guy.

Post match Cody takes out Ted with Cross Rhodes. Ted gets a bagging.

Kelly Kelly vs. Tamina

A quick inset promo by Natalya says Kelly is a real Barbie doll but she doesn’t play with dolls. Do these more often WWE. They’re a great way to give the characters TV time and let them say a little something. Booker has dubbed Tamina the Warrior Princess. Kelly does her usual stuff and spanks Tamina a bit. Tamina knocks Kelly down on a headscissors attempt and we talk about Tamina’s basketball career. Cole: “Tamina once had 69 rebounds in a game.” Booker: “That’s like Wilt Chamberlain scoring 100 points but from a female perspective.” Yeah I’ve got nothing. Stink Face and a bad K2 end this at 2:45.

Jinder Mahal blames Khali for losing the battle royal last week and says Khali has been reeducated to only serve Mahal. Tonight, the target is Ezekiel Jackson.

Great Khali vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Khali shoves him around to start so Jackson charges straight at him. That makes sense for him as it’s worked against everyone else and why shouldn’t he use it again here? We get the backstory again about Khali and Mahal. Off to the nerve hold which doesn’t last long. Jackson starts firing off his clotheslines in the corner but Khali gets the big boot up. Here’s the vice grip but since Khali is a heel his submission hold is useless and Jackson breaks it as well as makes a rope. Mahal tries to cheat and gets dropped, allowing Jackson to get the torture rack for the tap out at 2:55. Ok that was impressive.

Orton says he isn’t worried about Christian and then it’s on to Henry.

Video on Henry being all dominant and evil, which I think we’ve now seen some form of about 193 times if my math is correct. The difference here: it’s a lot longer.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

This is a rematch from Summerslam which they’ve played up about as much as humanly possible tonight. Booker says he’d be upset if he had been here 15 years like Henry had and got disrespected. It really has been 15 years. It seems like at least 16 or so. This is what you would expect from these two: a power brawl. Sheamus takes over to start and then Henry uses his power to take him back down.

Henry steps on his chest but Sheamus fires off some right hands. That goes nowhere as Henry headbutts him back down. What would a power match be without the heel throwing on a bear hug? They keep up the idea of Sheamus trying to get some shots in but Henry is too strong. Henry sets for a gorilla press but Sheamus counters into a pretty nice DDT.

He fires off the axe handles and then the forearms while Henry is in the ropes. A flying shoulder block gets two off the top. Henry rolls to the floor and the fun starts. Henry pulls him to the floor and then sends him literally flying into the barricade. Henry loads up the announce table but Sheamus counters the Slam and gets a big old Brogue Kick to send Henry over the table. Sheamus slides in to beat the count at 7:33.

Rating: C. This was really all they could do here and it’s the right move. They’re even now and Sheamus has a reason to want another crack at Henry because neither has the definitive win yet. This was exactly what you would expect in the form of a brawl and that’s what it should have been. There’s no need to have these guys try to be something they’re not and this match was watchable because of it.

Henry goes nuts after the match and manages to ram Sheamus into the apron. Sheamus fights back and rams Henry into the post but he tries to throw the steps at Henry at the post and misses. A World’s Strongest Slam onto the steps ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. Well with two long matches and the usual nothing bad from Smackdown you can’t call it a bad show. This was more of a placeholder show as the Super Smackdown was the focus, as it should be. Bret was a nice surprise but I would have liked to see him more than in just the opening segment. The Tuesday show was set up well and that’s the important thing right here. Good show but it was missing something that I couldn’t quite put my finger on.