Impact Wrestling – January 26, 2023: The Most Consistent Wrestling Show Of The Week

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 26, 2023
Location: Center Stage, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

The fallout from Hard To Kill continues and we are also on the way to No Surrender. The latter means that we need a new #1 contender and we will have one by the end of the night due to a six way elimination match. Other than that, Bully Ray now seems to have to deal with Mickie James and possibly Frankie Kazarian so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

X-Division Title: Mike Jackson vs. Trey Miguel

Jackson, 73 years old, is challenging and gets wristlocked down to start. Some running shoulders and a hiptoss have Miguel down for a change but Miguel punches him in the face. A hammerlock slam puts Jackson down but he avoids the springboard moonsault. An atomic drop sends Jackson outside, where he is fine enough to post Miguel. Back in and Jackson stays on the arm but takes too long with Oldest School, allowing Miguel to pull him down. The Lightning Spiral finishes for Miguel at 5:58.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t terrible by any means and factoring in Jackson’s age, it was downright impressive. Having someone who was nearly a wrestler’s normal retirement age over thirty years ago in there and looking acceptable is remarkable. There was no way he was winning the title here, but for a cool novelty, this was fun.

Post match Miguel goes to get the spray paint but finds Crazzy Steve instead. Steve has TREY written all over himself and pulls out his own spray paint to spray Trey’s logo on his chest. Miguel runs, partially because Black Taurus comes out as well.

Josh Alexander is ready to face anyone who wins tonight. Steve Maclin comes in to say that he’s coming for whoever comes out with the title.

Good Hands vs. Kushida/Kevin Knight

Skyler and Knight trade wrist control to start before it’s off to Kushida to stay on Skyler’s arm. A blind tag brings in Hotch though and a German suplex into a rollup gets two on Kushida. That just means Kushida gets to hit them in the face, allowing the tag off to Knight. Everything breaks down and Knight dropkicks Hotch off of Kushida’s shoulders, setting up the Hoverboard Lock to give Kushida the win at 4:00.

Rating: C. I’ve heard a good bit about Knight before but haven’t seen much of him in the ring. Putting him with Kushida is always a good idea though and having them beat up on Bully Ray’s goons worked. It was just a quick match to have Kushida and Knight get a win on TV and that was enough of a success.

Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal meet Shaw’s mystery partner, leaving Vidal VERY happy.

Mickie James wants to know what was up with Jordynne Grace saving her last week. Grace says she was protecting her investment, meaning her rematch. Seems cool with James.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: Death Dollz vs. Gisele Shaw/Tara

The Dollz are defending and have Rosemary in their corner to counter Jai Vidal. If nothing else, we get Tara’s BROKEN BROKEN entrance again. Tara and Taya start things off with a handshake but Shaw tags herself in before anything can happen. The fans are NOT pleased but Taya sending Shaw into the corner for some hip attacks work a bit better for them. Jessicka comes in and gets hammered down by Shaw.

The running uppercut puts Jessicka down again but she runs Shaw over, allowing the hot tag to Taya. Rosemary takes Vidal out, leaving Shaw to STILL not bring Tara in. Instead Tara comes in and gets yelled at by Shaw, who gets taken out by the Widow’s Peak. Jessicka comes in with the Sick Driver to retain at 6:12.

Rating: C+. This was all about the storytelling as Shaw is now fully embracing being the worst partner in the world. That is a story to tell as eventually she will find the right partner and could make for a good pairing. For now though, Tara was just there to get annoyed and then hit the Widow’s Peak. Another fine step forward in a bigger story.

Taylor Wilde consults tarot cards to find out she will be seeing Killer Kelly again.

Dave LaGreca is thankful for being part of Impact when Bully Ray comes in. He wants to know why he is the only former World Champion not in the #1 contenders match. Santino Marella says Ray lost at Hard To Kill and Ray, who does like Marella, threatens him if he doesn’t get it. LaGreca knows that only Tommy Dreamer can help this.

Tasha Steelz says she didn’t get pinned by Mickie James in a singles match. This isn’t working though, any of it. Steelz walks out on the interview, plus Savannah Evans.

Major Players vs. Bullet Club

Cardona and Bey trade shoulders to start before Bey armdrags him into an armbar. The Club cleans house with the rapid fire strikes but a Cardona distraction lets Myers deck Bey. Cardona drops a knee for two and Myers grabs a front facelock. Bey gets in a whip into the corner though and the double tag brings in Austin and Cardona. Everything breaks down and the Reboot hits Bey, setting up Myers’ top rope elbow for two. The assisted Art of Finesse is broken up so Austin kicks Cardona in the face, setting up a quick rollup for the pin at 6:55.

Rating: C+. There was some miscommunication in there between the Major Players and that could be a bad sign for the team’s future. I could see the team splitting down the line as the specter of WWE always looms over someone like Cardona. The Bullet Club has absolutely found its niche as the fast moving pair of smaller guys and they looked rather good in a win here.

Post match here is Joe Hendry to accept Matt Cardona’s challenge for a Digital Media Title match. Cardona is the original Internet Champion but lately, Cardona must feel a bit left out. That’s why Hendry has written him a son, with a focus on Cardona wanting to play with action figures instead of spending, ahem, quality time with his wife. Throw in the line “You’re the king of the indies and now you’re rich, but to me you’ll always be Edge’s b****” and Cardona is really not pleased. Hendry’s stuff continues to be awesome.

Post break Myers and Cardona come up to Moose and promise to get rid of Hendry. End of scene.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Sheldon Jean

Gresham headlocks him down to start before tripping Jean down and cranking on the leg. Back up and Jean kicks him in the face, earning a dropkick to the knee. Gresham cranks the knee again and hits a sliding forearm for the pin at 3:03.

Rating: C. Give Gresham a warm body to work with and let him hack it to pieces one limb at a time. That is a formula that is going to work as Gresham knows how to do that style as well as anyone going right now. He made it look easy here and putting something like that on TV for a few weeks is a good way to remind fans that this is a wrestling show.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Moose vs. Rhino vs. Rich Swann vs. Eddie Edwards vs. Sami Callihan vs. Chris Sabin

Elimination rules and the winner gets a World Title shot at No Surrender. The brawl starts fast and Rhino and Moore are left alone in the ring for an exchange of shoulders. Sabin comes in to shoulder Rhino down but he walks into a suplex from Callihan. It’s Sabin back up with a dive to the floor onto Moose and Swann snaps off a running hurricanrana to Edwards. Swann’s running flip dive off the apron takes down Moose and Edwards on the floor.

Back in and Edwards hits a Blue Thunder Bomb on Swann, leaving Rhino to hit some running shoulders to Callihan in the corner. Moose spears Rhino though, allowing Callihan to get the elimination at 4:32. We take a break and come back with Moose cleaning house, including dropkicking Swann and Sabin on the top at the same time. Sabin takes Moose down with a tornado DDT and does the same to Edwards.

Callihan is back in to kick away at Swann and Sabin but Swann bulldogs Callihan/kicks Edwards for a double knockdown. Swann’s middle rope splash gets two on Callihan but Edwards powerbombs Swann onto Sabin for two more. The Boston Knee Party is loaded up but here is PCO to go after Edwards. The distraction lets Sabin roll Edwards up for the pin at 13:25. Moose comes back in to Rock Bottom Sabin for two and shrugs off the tornado DDT. The spear finishes Sabin at 15:31 and we’re down to three.

We take another break and come back with a three way slugout with Swann getting the better of things until Moose takes out his leg. Moose pounds on the leg but Swann grabs a quick rollup for the pin at 23:18. Cue the Design to tell Callihan to take out Swann so Callihan goes after the bad knee. Swann rolls him up to escape so Callihan powerbombs him into another leglock. With that broken up, Swann kicks him in the head a few times, setting up the middle rope 450 for the pin and the title shot at 26:27.

Rating: B-. Swann going forward to the title shot is a good way to go, as he is credible enough to give Alexander a threat but not likely to take the title. They have to find someone to keep the challenger spot warm for Steve Maclin, who seems likely to be the next champion. They kept the action moving here and making it elimination rules was the best thing they could have gone.

Post match Swann tries to talk sense into Callihan but gets beaten down for his efforts. Yuyu Uemura comes in for a failed save attempt so Josh Alexander and Frankie Kazarian run in for the real save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. As has been the case for a good while now, Impact continues to shine and look like one of the best weekly wrestling shows around. It shows you just how far the company has come and it is great to see them turning into such a fun show. Normally I would say to keep it going, but they have been doing it for such a long time now that it’s not even about maintaining momentum anymore. Good show here and I want to see where this is going, as is usual these days.

Results
Trey Miguel b. Mike Jackson – Lightning Spiral
Kushida/Kevin Knight b. Good Hands – Hoverboard Lock to Hotch
Death Dollz b. Gisele Shaw/Tara – Sick Driver to Shaw
Bullet Club b. Major Players – Rollup to Cardona
Jonathan Gresham b. Sheldon Jean – Sliding forearm
Rich Swann won a six way elimination match last eliminating Sami Callihan

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – January 19, 2023: They Broke The Trend

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 19, 2023
Location: Center Stage, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are done with Hard To Kill and that means it is time to go through the fallout period. The big story coming out of the show was Mickie James ending her Last Rodeo by defeating Jordynne Grace to become the new Knockouts Champion. Other than that, Josh Alexander is still the World Champion, having defeated Bully Ray in Full Metal Mayhem. Let’s get to it.

Here is Hard To Kill if you need a recap.

In Memory Of Jay Briscoe, with Tom Hannifan giving a brief voiceover about thoughts and prayers being with the Briscoe family.

Long Hard To Kill recap.

Here is Mickie James to get things going. The Last Rodeo may be over but Hardcore Country lives forever…and Bully Ray interrupts. Ray tells her to get out but James tells HIM to get out. Ray: “You were not in the main event of Hard To Kill.” Fans: “YES SHE WAS!” Ray insists that HE was the main event, not he and Josh Alexander. The reality is that no one cared about this place until he got here four months ago. James says the only headline she saw was BULLY RAY TAPPED OUT!

That doesn’t sit well with Ray, but Mickie keeps going about how Bully is just a bully who politics his way to the top. She knows how he feels about women in wrestling, so if he wants to, get rid of her. Cue Tasha Steelz and Savannah Evans, the former of which wants to see Ray go upside James’ head. Steelz says Mickie started the Last Rodeo because she can’t beat Tasha Steelz, which earns her a shove from James.

The challenge is thrown out (with Ray egging Steelz on) but Evans decks James. Ray grabs the table, which draws out Jordynne grace and Frankie Kazarian for the save. Cue Santino Marella to make a match, but he has to do math to figure out the right one. Cue…..ERNEST THE CAT MILLER of all people to say that since he used to be WCW’s Commissioner, he can offer some advice. The six person tag is made, following one of the most bizarre but oddly entertaining cameos I can remember in a long time.

Mickie James/Jordynne Grace/Frankie Kazarian vs. Bully Ray/Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans

Steelz slugs away at grace to start before it’s off to Evans, who gets sent into the corner. Grace wants Ray, but the distraction lets Evans jump her from behind. That doesn’t last long either so it’s off to James for a nice reaction. Evans drops James as well but a hurricanrana out of the corner is good for a breather. Ray pulls James down from the apron though and we take a break.

Back with Ray slamming James and laying on the mat to add the trash talk. Steelz comes back in and we hit the chinlock but Mickie is back up again. Another kick sends James back into the corner though and the beating continues. A quick roll out of the corner gets James over to Grace, meaning house can be cleaned. Ray goes after Grace, who fireman’s carries him without much trouble. Kazarian comes in and hammers on Ray but James gets the tag, setting up the top rope Thesz press to finish Steelz at 13:57.

Rating: B-. This is the kind of fun match you want to start a show with and they even wrapped up James vs. Steelz so James can get on to another feud. Kazarian going after Ray is different and now I’m curious to see where that might go. Then again, Grace fighting Ray worked in a short bit and didn’t feel weird either, which is quite difficult to pull off.

Post match here is Masha Slamovich to give James the death warrant.

Santino Marella talks to Ernest Miller in the back and talks about a six way match with all former World Champions (Moose, Eddie Edwards, Sami Callihan, Rich Swann, Rhino, Chris Sabin) to crown a new #1 contender to Josh Alexander for No Surrender. Marella goes over to Dirty Dango but Steve Maclin interrupts. He wants to know why Rich Swann, who Maclin beat at Hard To Kill, is in the #1 contenders match. The result: Dango vs. Maclin tonight.

Ashley D’Amboise vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Purrazzo hammers her down to start and works on the arm, setting up the surfboard. A suplex gives Purrazzo two and a backbreaker gives Purrazzo two, as she pulls D’Amboise up. That’s enough to let D’Amboise get in a knee and a running flip neckbreaker. Purrazzo isn’t having this and hits a powerbomb into the Queen’s Gambit for the pin at 4:21.

Rating: C. I thought they might do the whole “squash until a fluke rollup” finish so nicely done on having Purrazzo look like a killer instead. She could use a reheating after a few down months so it was nice to see her wrecking people again. Not a classic or anything, but a completely fine squash.

A nervous Gia Miller goes to see PCO in the bowels of the building. When asked what is next, PCO screams a lot and shakes the cage wall.

Trey Miguel comes in to see Ashley D’Amboise and praises her skill, but she needs to hit the gym a bit more. D’Amboise: “Thank you.” Miguel: “Was that disrespect?” They argue until 73 year old Mike Jackson comes in to issue a challenge for title match next week.

Taylor Wilde vs. Killer Kelly

They do the creepy looks at each other until Wilde armdrags her into an armdrag. Back up and they trade shots up against the ropes with Wilde getting the better of things. A suplex sets up a guillotine choke to Kelly but she’s back up with forearms to the face. Wilde shrugs that off and hits a Codebreaker but gets sent to the apron. Kelly charges and lands in kind of a jumping Pedigree (that was cool) for a heck of a crash. That just makes Kelly smile at her and fire off some headbutts to take over. A quick Wilde Ride gives Wilde two so they trade rollups, with Kelly pulling her into the Killer Klutch for the tap at 7:15.

Rating: C+. This was a rather nice surprise as I wouldn’t have bet on seeing these two have an actually compelling match. I wasn’t sure who was going to win but Wilde looked sharper than she has since her return. The good thing is pushing Kelly though, as she feels different enough to be a threat while still being fresh. Nice job with this one.

On Before The Impact, Deaner made Sami Callihan take out an injured Delirious.

Deaner says that Callihan has to go through a seven step process and he has gone through two in a row. Next week, he is in the Golden Six Shooter #1 contenders match. Step three: win the title and bring it to the Design. What exactly is step #4?

Josh Alexander tells Santino Marella that he is fine with the #1 contenders match. Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal come in, with Shaw saying she is owed a Knockouts Tag Team Title shot but needs a partner. Various women walk by and turn her down without as much as a second thought but Vidal seems interested. I don’t think that is going to pass.

Dirty Dango vs. Steve Maclin

Maclin starts fast and knocks Dango around the ring, only to have Dango fight up and chop away. That doesn’t last long either as Maclin sends him into the ropes for a running crotch attack to the back of the head. A backbreaker gets two on Dango and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Dango fights up and fires off more chops, setting up the Dirtbag Shuffle (dancing legdrop). The top rope legdrop is loaded up but Maclin bails to the ramp. That’s fine with Dango, who hits a dive to take him out. Maclin is fine enough to backdrop him into the ring though and after the spear in the corner, the KIA finishes Dango at 5:41.

Rating: C. Maclin continues his rise to the top of the title picture as it is hard to imagine anyone else getting the title shot at Rebellion. Putting Maclin over a name like Dango is going to do him some good and it seems like he is going to be around for a bit. Dango is to the point where a loss isn’t going to hut him so this went fine all around.

The Major Players are ready for the Bullet Club next week. Moose comes up and says the Majors’ issues started when they lost to Joe Hendry. After they beat the Club, they’re coming for Hendry soon.

Busted Open Radio host Dave LaGreca sits down with co-host Tommy Dreamer to talk about their issues with other co-host Bully Ray. Both are upset with him but Dreamer won’t bring up their history together, including hooking Ray up with D-Von. Dreamer says he loses matches but not a war, and he’s going to war with Ray. Does he have to?

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Kenny King vs. Mike Bailey

Pit Fight, meaning no ropes and you only win by knockout or submission. They both miss some kicks to start until King takes him down and they go with the grappling on the mat. Back up and Bailey grabs a throw, sending King down to the floor for a breather. King gets back in and kicks Bailey to the floor for a whip into the steps. Bailey is sent head first into a light on the ramp to knock him silly as we take a break.

We come back with King firing off some knees to the chest and then dragon screw leg whipping Bailey down. Bailey, bleeding a bit, kicks King to the floor for a break before striking away back inside. The cross armbreaker has King in more trouble but he powerbombs his way to freedom. Bailey is fine enough to grab another armbreaker, only to be dragon screwed to the floor again. King nails a dive and grabs a chair before dodging a kick, sending Bailey’s foot into the post.

The Figure Four goes on but Bailey is out, setting up a run down the ramp into a running dropkick to send King outside. Then, after kicking a post with his bare foot, Bailey climbs to the top of the post and flip dives onto King. Tom: “Total nonstop action here in this Pit Fight!” The Ultimate Weapon is blocked though and King spinebusters him onto the apron. A kneebar goes on as the fans find this awesome. Bailey uses the chair from earlier for the save the moonsault knees knock King silly. A stomp onto the chair onto King’s head is good for the knockout at 16:41.

Rating: B. First of all, big points for trying something different. I’m not sure how much it was needed but they did try to go outside the box and it seemed to work. They beat each other up and it felt like the big close to the feud. Ignoring Bailey’s usual horrible selling (kick pose, King works the leg, Bailey does a bunch of flips and dives) and this was fun, with the fans certainly digging the heck out of it.

Overall Rating: B-. This was the show where everyone kind of stepped back and took a breath after the huge show last week and that’s cool. Sometimes you need to just chill for a bit and let the midcard take over while setting some things up for later. The six way match should be good and we can start getting ready for No Surrender, with Rebellion off in the distance. Nice show, and it’s great to see Impact shaking the tread of bad fallout from major pay per views.

Results
Mickie James/Jordynne Grace/Frankie Kazarian b. Bully Ray/Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans – Top rope Thesz press to Steelz
Deonna Purrazzo b. Ashley D’Amboise – Queen’s Gambit
Killer Kelly b. Deonna Purrazzo – Killer Klutch
Steve Maclin b. Dirty Dango – KIA
Mike Bailey b. Kenny King via knockout

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Hard To Kill 2023: The Hard Part

Hard To Kill 2023
Date: January 13, 2023
Location: Center Stage, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

It’s back to pay per view and Impact is actually on a heck of a roll right now. They are getting almost everything right at the moment and I’m wanting to see the show a lot more than I would have expected. We have a double main event as Bully Ray is challenging Josh Alexander in a Full Metal Mayhem match, plus Mickie James’ Last Rodeo continues as she challenges Jordynne Grace for the Knockouts Title. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Kushida vs. Angels vs. Delirious vs. Mike Bailey vs. Mike Jackson vs. Yuya Uemura

This is a bit weird as the pre-show broadcast begins with most of the wrestlers in the ring, including the previously unadvertised Delirious (seemingly replacing Bhupinder Gujjar). Delirious misses (maybe) a charge at the returning Kushida to start and winds up on the floor. Uemura and Kushida are left in the ring to trade arm holds until Kushida hiptosses him into the basement dropkick.

Delirious comes back in to neckbreaker Kushida but it’s Jackson (73 years old) coming in to armdrag Delirious to the floor. Bailey moonsaults onto a pile on the floor, setting up Jackson’s suicide dive (Tom: “FOR THE LOVE OF AARP!”), because of course he does. Back in and Angels takes over but Jackson takes him down by the arm. We hear about Jackson debuting at this venue in 1989 at FORTY years old (Tom: “I was six months old.”) before he goes Old School around all four ropes and then dives on everyone else fighting in the ring. Angels is back up with a suplex to Jackson but Delirious pulls Angels down into a Boston crab.

With that broken up, Bailey comes in with the bouncing kicks to Delirious but Uemura dropkicks him down. The running spinning kick in the corner blasts Uemura, only to have Kenny King run in to break up the Ultimate Weapon. With a bunch of people in the corner, Kushida hits his running front flip kicks, setting up the cross armbreaker to make Angels tap at 7:28.

Rating: C+. As usual, it’s hard to stand out in any way in this kind of a match and, other than Jackson (because geez), no one exactly did. The good thing is that Kushida is back and can be a huge boost to the X-Division, if not its outright champion. I would have expected Bailey to win here so points for throwing in a fine curve.

Pre-Show: X-Division Title: Black Taurus vs. Trey Miguel

Taurus is challenging and Crazzy Steve handles his introduction (for a match originally on the main card). The chase is on outside to start, allowing Miguel to hit some running dropkicks back inside. Back up and Taurus misses a running knee in the corner, allowing Miguel to hit a dive to the floor. Taurus strikes away back inside but it’s too early for Destination Hellhole.

A pop up Samoan drop doesn’t work either as Miguel reverses into a crucifix bomb (sweet) for two of his own. Miguel goes to the ramp for a running charge, only to dive into a Samoan drop. Taurus shrugs off some strikes and hits a heck of a Pounce. The over the shoulder backbreaker gives Taurus two but Miguel backdrops a charge out to the floor. A Code Red on the floor rocks Taurus again and the top rope Meteora gives Miguel two more.

Miguel takes him back inside and tries a springboard hurricanrana, which is countered into a super gorilla press (awesome) but Destination Hellhole is countered into the Lightning Spiral. Miguel’s feet on the ropes are seen though, meaning it’s time for the spray paint. The referee takes that away (art hater) so Miguel whips out another can and blinds Taurus, setting up another Lightning Spiral to retain at 10:15.

Rating: C+. They had some pretty cool spots in there as Taurus can do all kinds of things, including mixing in some power. At the same time you have Miguel really finding his niche as a heel and the spray paint works well for him. Then again with Kushida around, that title could be in some serious jeopardy rather soon.

The roster is on the stage for a tribute to Don West. The show is dedicated to him and we get a ten bell salute (with what sounds like Josh Matthews directing the person ringing the bell).

The opening video talks about how eventually you hit rock bottom, but that doesn’t mean it is the end of you. People can fight back up and overcome everything, because you are hard to kill.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Bully Ray vs. Josh Alexander

Alexander is defending in Full Metal Mayhem, meaning TLC with pins/submissions. Ray hides during the entrances and jumps Alexander from behind to start things fast. A belt shot to the face has Alexander in more trouble and Ray sends a table inside before the opening bell. Ray tosses him inside and demands the bell ring but the bloody Alexander has to say yes first. Sure he’s in, so the bell rings and Ray powerbombs him through a table for two to start fast.

We go old school (of course) as Ray whips out a cheese grater so Alexander gets smart by punching Ray in the face. The grater to the face sends Ray (bleeding as well) outside. Some trashcan lid shots tot he head have Ray in more trouble and there’s the grater to the head to draw the real blood. The thumbtacks are brought in but Alexander chairs him in the back first.

Alexander puts Ray on a table on the ramp and loads up a ladder, only to have Ray tip it over and send him into the ring, onto the tacks. The Bully Bomb is broken up and Alexander hits a German suplex to rock Ray again. A Regal Roll onto the tacks set up a middle rope knee (with chain wrapped around) to the head. The ankle lock goes on but Jason Hotch and John Skyler run in for the save. A 3D onto the tacks gets two on Alexander so the goons zip tie him to the top rope.

Cue Tommy Dreamer for the save with a trashcan shot to Ray. That earns Dreamer a spear through the table in the corner, leaving Alexander to get trash canned in the head. Cue Alexander’s wife Jade (not supposed to be here) to beg him for mercy (Ray: “I WANT TO SEE TEARS!”). Ray demands her wedding ring but gets low blowed instead. Sliced Bread onto the tacks (Jade is a former wrestler so it’s not insane) knocks Ray silly and Alexander is loose. Ray is put on another table and a splash from the ladder drives him through it for two. The ankle lock makes Ray tap at 17:02.

Rating: B-. This is a tricky one as the match wasn’t all that great, mainly due to a bunch of stalling and interference taking away from the action. That being said, I’ll absolutely take this over what would have been a pretty lame regular match between these two. Ray losing should get rid of him, at least at this level, for a good stretch. Alexander gets to retain again, but he needs a better challenger next time. What Ray did in the feud and here as well was far from awful, but it was really hard to get around the fact that it was Bully Ray in this spot at this time.

Victoria/Tara gives Mickie James a pep talk before her Knockouts Title match (now the main event) against Jordynne Grace. Raven pops in to say he wanted to be here in case it’s the end for James (since he was here at the beginning for her).

We recap the Tag Team Title match. All of the teams save for Bullet Club keep attacking each other and trading wins so now the titles are on the line.

Tag Team Titles: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Bullet Club vs. Major Players vs. Heath/Rhino

The Guns are defending under elimination rules and it’s Ace Austin/Chris Bey for the Club. It’s a brawl to start (duh) before the bell as the referee can’t get this down to one wrestler from two teams to make things official. We finally get Rhino beating on Myers to ring the bell with Heath coming in to hammer away almost immediately. Myers gets out of trouble and brings in Cardona for a neckbreaker on Heath.

It’s right back to Myers for two off a knee drop and the lifting Downward Spiral gets two. Heath is back up with the super powerslam, which is enough for the tag back to Rhino to clean house. A quick distraction lets Cardona send Rhino into the corner, setting up the rollup pin to get rid of Heath/Rhino at 3:39.

Bey comes in to roll Cardona up as the pace picks way up. Myers comes in to snap a suplex for two on Bey but it’s back to Cardona for more neckbreakers. An enziguri gets Bey out of trouble though and it’s Austin coming in to kick away. Austin’s springboard missile dropkick sends Myers sprawling and Shelley tags himself in to start on Austin’s leg. A dragon screw legwhip gets two on Austin and we hit the Figure Four.

With that broken up, Austin manages an enziguri and kicks Sabin away, allowing Bey to come in and beat up the Major Players. An assisted Art of Finesse sets up the Fold to pin Myers at 10:23, leaving us with the Guns vs. the Bullet Club. Sabin takes out the Club on his own and it’s Shelley coming back in to double team Austin. Back up and the assisted Art of Finesse hits Sabin but Myers is still here for a distraction. Sabin suicide dives onto Bey and it’s the Dirt Bomb to retain the titles at 13:10.

Rating: B. This was about cramming as many people in there as you could get away with but the elimination rules held a lot. Getting rid of some of those people makes all of the difference in the world and the Guns feel like they won instead of surviving. I’m a bit surprised that they won, but more Guns is not a bad thing.

As the Guns go to leave, Frankie Kazarian comes out for a surprise chat. Kazarian talks about everything he has been doing lately and announces that he has signed a long term deal with Impact Wrestling, meaning he is done with AEW. If he isn’t doing anything in AEW, making the move makes sense for him.

We recap Joe Hendry defending the Digital Media Title against Moose. Hendry has been getting on Moose’s nerves so he’s coming after the title.

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Moose

Hendry is defending and they start fast with Hendry elbowing him in the face and grabbing a spinning slam. Moose tosses him over the top and takes it to the floor for a posting. That doesn’t do much to Hendry, who loads up a suplex, walks halfway around the ring, and then drops Moose.

Back in and Moose kicks him down before stomping on various things. A slap to the face wakes Hendry up though and he fireman’s carry tosses Moose out to the floor. Moose is right back with a chokebomb out of the corner for two, followed by a top rope superplex for the same. They get back up and strike it out until Hendry hits a clothesline. The Standing Ovation doesn’t work as Moose hits a release Rock Bottom for two instead.

That’s enough for Moose, who goes to grab the title. With that taken away, it’s a low blow to set up the spear to give Moose the pin and the title. Hold on though as here is Santino Marella (by that name) to announce that he is the new Director Of Authority. Marella, with the thick accent and weird way of speaking, says he doesn’t like cheaters so we’re restarting this thing. Hendry grabs the Standing Ovation to retain at 14:05.

Rating: C+. Well so much for a lot of my enjoyment around this place. Santino has never been someone I particularly care to see and now we’ll have to see his WACKY (and repetitive) comedy every week because he was a thing about twelve years ago. As for the match, good on letting Hendry have a big win, as he is getting somewhere with this run and needed a bigger win to make it work. I’m curious to see how far this version can go, because he seems to have all of the tools.

We look back at Kenny King costing Mike Bailey the pre-show match.

King isn’t sure why Bailey is wrestling when they’re going into the Fight Pit next week. That’s the Bailey King wants and he better bring it.

Masha Slamovich vs. Killer Kelly vs. Taylor Wilde vs. Deonna Purrazzo

For a future Women’s Title match. Slamovich goes after Wilde to start and they fight to the floor, leaving Kelly to forearms Purrazzo. That doesn’t last long and it’s Purrazzo hitting a dive, followed by Slamovich hitting one of her own. Back in and Wilde chokes Kelly in the ropes until Purrazzo comes back in for the save.

Purrazzo and Wilde both grab a half crab on Kelly at the same time but both of them are broken up. After a series of knockdowns, Kelly grabs the Killer Klutch on Purrazzo. Wilde Crossfaces Slamovich at the same time but Slamovich fights up and Snowplows Wilde onto the other two for the pin and the title shot at 9:21.

Rating: C. This was a bit of a mess but it was also weirdly put together. You have Kelly, who was pushed hard for a few weeks and then more or less dropped. You have Wilde, who got a new gimmick about two weeks ago and already lost. You have Purrazzo, who could be slotted into any title match needed but has already had her time with the title. Then you have Slamovich, who lost both of her big matches, as well as a match to Wilde last week. That’s not exactly building her up, but at least she is getting another title shot.

We recap Rich Swann vs. Steve Maclin. While Maclin is all about violence and destruction, Swann is standing up to him and is ready to fight. Now it’s falls count anywhere so they can get more violent.

Rich Swann vs. Steve Maclin

Falls count anywhere and Raven is on commentary. Maclin jumps Swann in the back during an interview and the fight is on fast. A missed charge sends Maclin into a dumpster (Raven: “Yeah that was kind of dumb.”) but he’s right back with a bucket shot for two. They fight outside near the traffic, with Raven wanting to see one of them hit by a car.

Swann is fine enough to hit a cartwheel cutter but they stop to fight against a moving car, which is leaving the arena for some reason. Some shovel shots stagger Maclin and they come into the arena, where Maclin plants him onto the apron for two. They get inside for the first time with Swann hitting a running dropkick into the corner. It’s right back to the floor where Swann hits another cutter for two more.

Back in and Swann kicks away, only to get launched onto the ramp. Swann kicks him off the ramp and hits the splash for two. Maclin staggers up and counters a running hurricanrana off the apron into a Liger Bomb. A missed elbow lets Swann hit a superkick but Maclin hits him with a piece of barricade. The KIA on the ramp finishes Swann at 11:42.

Rating: C. I wasn’t wild on the match itself as it was such a brawl that the wrestling was barely a factor. The good things here were of course Raven on commentary as he has that riffing style that can be hilarious, plus the continued rise of Maclin. There is almost no way anyone else is the next challenger for the World Title and it wouldn’t surprise me to see him win the thing. Not a bad brawl, but what matters is Maclin racking up another win over another former World Champion.

We recap Jonathan Gresham vs. Eddie Edwards. Last year saw Edwards as part of Honor No More and Gresham is all about honor. Now Gresham is back for revenge so let’s have a fight.

Eddie Edwards vs. Jonathan Gresham

Feeling out process to start with Edwards bailing to the floor after getting out technicaled. Edwards brings Gresham outside with him, misses a clothesline, and gets frustrated at Gresham being back inside. Back in and Gresham sends him outside for a change, immediately followed by a fast dive. They get back inside again with Edwards snapping off an overhead belly to belly to take over.

Gresham grabs some armdrags and kicks at the arm before cranking away. Edwards manages a powerslam to escape and a hanging cutter gets two. A neckbreaker gets the same but Gresham is back up and cranks on the arm again. They strike it out until Gresham hits an enziguri into a standing moonsault for two of his own. A Blue Thunder Bomb gets Edwards out of trouble but his arm is all banged up.

The Backpack Stunner is broken up and Gresham sends him outside for the suicide dive. Back in and Edwards loads up a superplex, which is reversed into a choke with Edwards still on the ropes. Edwards is smart enough to drop straight down onto the buckle for the escape and a sitout powerbomb gets two. They go into a pinfall reversal sequence for two each until a tiger driver gives Edwards two more. The Boston Knee Party finishes Gresham at 18:49.

Rating: B. This was a heck of a match as Gresham is a technical master but Edwards is good enough to hold his own against him. That left the idea of Gresham still fighting for honor and Edwards trying to prove he still had it. As a result, you had two guys trying to pick up the win wherever they could until Edwards finally knocked Gresham silly for the win. Good stuff here, which you had to expect from this combination.

Post match the lights go out and (as the chants give away the reveal), it’s the returning PCO, spitting sand out of his mouth. Edwards gets chokeslammed and the monster is back.

We recap Mickie James vs. Jordynne Grace for the Knockouts Title. James wants to prove that she still has it by winning the Knockouts Title one more time. Otherwise, she is retiring, giving us the huge stakes.

Knockouts Title: Jordynne Grace vs. Mickie James

James is challenging and some Native American dancers play her to the ring. As a bonus, her family (minus Nick Aldis) is in the front row. After the Big Match Intros, Grace powers her into the corner to start and James can’t even grab a rollup. James slaps her a few times before getting dropped with a heck of a slap from Grace.

Back up and Grace double stomps her out of the corner, meaning it’s time to start the real beating. Grace stomps away and tells James to stay down, only to pull her up in the corner. We’ll call that a mixed message as Grace misses a running knee in the corner and a super bulldog gives James a breather. They slug it out until James kicks her in the face before taking it out to the ramp.

The Thesz press drops Grace again but she blocks the MickDT. James settles for a guillotine but Grace muscles her to the top for a superplex floated into a Jackhammer for two more. James comes back with a flapjack into a nipup and now the Thesz press connects for another near fall. A spinebuster cuts James off and a sitout powerbomb gets two. Grace hits her in the neck of all things but a Tombstone is countered with a headscissors.

The Mick Kick is shrugged off so they hit a pinfall reversal sequence for two each. The Grace Driver is countered into a small package for two and another Mick Kick staggers Grace this time. The MickDT gives us the real near fall but Grace pulls her into a sleeper with a bodyscissors. Mickie powers up again though and Grace misses a charge into the post. That’s enough for Mickie to grab a tornado DDT for the pin and the title at 19:22.

Rating: B. This had the drama it needed but never quite got to the level of epic. What mattered here was having Mickie prove she can still do it against a top star. A lot of that comes from having Grace built up as a monster over the last several months, meaning James’ opponent meant something here in addition to the title. I’m glad this headlined the show as it was the better story all the way up to the show and they certainly delivered with what they were trying to do.

James’ family and Tara get in the ring to celebrate with her to end the show.

No word on why the Death Dollz vs. Gisele Shaw/Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans didn’t take place.

Overall Rating: B. The show was rather good for the most part with nothing bad, but there were some weak parts in the middle that dragged it down a bit. What mattered was the big matches delivered and I was into seeing Mickie get the title back to end the Last Rodeo. The important thing about Impact is that they aren’t doing anything horrible or even bad, and that is a huge step forward over their more infamous years. Overall, good show and they did what they needed to do to start the new year.

Results
Kushida b. Angels, Delirious, Mike Jackson, Yuya Uemura and Mike Bailey – Cross armbreaker to Angels
Trey Miguel b. Black Taurus – Lightning Spiral
Josh Alexander b. Bully Ray – Ankle lock
Motor City Machine Guns b. Bullet Club, Heath/Rhino and Major Players – Dirt Bomb to Bey
Joe Hendry b. Moose – Standing Ovation
Masha Slamovich b. Taylor Wilde, Deonna Purrazzo and Killer Kelly – Snowplow to Wilde
Steve Maclin b. Rich Swann – KIA
Eddie Edwards b. Jonathan Gresham – Boston Knee Party
Mickie James b. Jordynne Grace – Tornado DDT

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – January 12, 2023: They Did What They Needed To

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 12, 2023
Location: Charles F. Dodge City Center, Pembroke Pines, Florida
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s the go home show for Hard To Kill and since Impact does their pay per views on Fridays, the show is tomorrow night. That should mean the card is intact but you never know around here. Hopefully the roll can continue around here, as it has been a rather nice few weeks in a row. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Bully Ray’s rise to the top of the company, including him attacking Scott D’Amore last week.

We get a Zoom interview with Josh Matthews talking to Bully Ray and Josh Alexander, both at their homes. Alexander knows Ray is going after everyone he cares about and they will be in his mind at Hard To Kill. Ray thinks Alexander has given away his hand because Ray is in his head. Last week Ray didn’t need to have an Anthem executive take a swing at him.

Ray talks about how he has gotten Alexander to do whatever he wants, because Ray knows he can’t wrestle Alexander for one hour. That’s why he dragged Alexander into Full Metal Mayhem, which is Ray’s kind of match. Alexander doesn’t care because he’s ready for anything, but Ray loves hearing that, because Alexander has no idea what kind of pain is coming. Ray walks out and Alexander is ready. There was nothing revolutionary being said here, but points for doing it in a different way.

Brian Myers vs. Heath

Matt Cardona and Rhino are here too. They go technical to start with Myers taking him to the mat for some slaps to the back of the head. Back up and Heath hits a running forearm in the corner before raining down some right hands. Everyone almost gets into it on the floor so Rhino and Cardona are both gone. Heath uses the distraction to hit a running flip dive off the apron to take Myers out. Myers is right back with a running forearm and we take a break.

Back with Myers grabbing the chinlock but Heath fights up and starts slugging away. A release flapjack plants Myers and a neckbreaker gives Heath two. It’s too early for the Wake Up Call though, allowing Myers to grab the implant DDT for two of his own. The Roster Cut misses so Myers spears him down for another near fall. Myers goes up but gets super powerslammed (cool) back down, meaning it’s time to slug it out. They go up top with Heath being knocked down and Myers dropping the elbow for two. Myers yells at the referee though and it’s the Wake Up Call to give Heath the pin at 12:18.

Rating: B-. These two were actually having a heck of a match here and I’ll take that every time. Neither of them are exactly known for tearing it up out there and usually stay in the “eh, that was fine” category. This was a rather entertaining match and maybe the best I’ve seen from the two of them on their own.

Ace Austin and Chris Bey are ready to win the Tag Team Titles.

Someone has attacked Taya Valkyrie and Rosemary wants revenge. Taya says the four of them did this.

Savannah Evans vs. Rosemary

Tasha Steelz, Gisele Shaw, Jai Vidal (likely the rest of the four) and Jessicka are here too. They go straight to the power brawling to start with Rosemary hammering her into the corner to take over. That’s reversed so Evans can fire off forearms in the corner, only to have Rosemary come off the middle rope with a forearm of her own. Evans bails to the floor so Rosemary dives onto her and Vidal as we take a break.

Back with Evans charging into a knee in the corner and grabbing the Upside Down. A distraction lets Evans hammer away even more though and some choking from the floor makes it worse. The chinlock goes on but Rosemary is up almost immediately. Rosemary grabs a reverse DDT into a Sling Blade but Evans plants her with a spinebuster. A quick spear gets Rosemary out of trouble, only to have Vidal distract the referee. That’s enough for Shaw to get involved, allowing Evans to grab the full nelson slam for the pin at 12:08.

Rating: C. Not much to this one but they set up the title match for the pay per view. There still isn’t a ton of heat to the whole thing but the injury angle with Taya should be enough to carry them through. It’s still almost weird to see Rosemary losing though, as she was such a force around here for so long.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: Moose b. Rhino at Hard To Kill 2020.

Taylor Wilde is now a witch. The People’s Witch.

We look at Mickie James’ big losses, sending her into the Last Rodeo. Now she’s ready to win the Knockouts Title from Jordynne Grace, but Grace isn’t so sure.

Here is the Design to shave Sami Callihan’s hair, complete with the ring surrounded by lackeys. Deaner says this is the process so Callihan needs to take the first step. The lights go out and Callihan appears, with Deaner telling him to hand the baseball bat to Kon. Callihan hands it over, with Deaner comparing this to the story of Samson. Deaner keeps making sure Callihan is ok with this and we finally get to the haircut….until Callihan stops him.

Callihan finishes it himself and the fans aren’t happy. Deaner makes him look in a mirror so Callihan grabs the scissors. He hands them back to Deaner, who declares this the death of the Death Machine and the birth of Callihan. Odds are the big twist is coming later, but it’s still going to be the Design so it might not matter.

Gail Kim announces that due to Scott D’Amore being taken out by Bully Ray, a new authority figure will be named at Hard To Kill.

Mike Bailey vs. Anthony Greene

They start fast with Greene taking him into the corner but Bailey kicks him in the chest. Bailey knocks him to the floor and goes outside too, where he gets whipped into the steps for his efforts. Back in and Greene’s half crab sends Bailey to the ropes before Greene misses a charge to the floor. That lets Bailey hit the springboard moonsault, followed by the standing shooting star press for two back inside. A sitout powerbomb and superkick give Greene two each but Bailey blocks the running the ropes Unprettier. Bailey hits the spinning kick in the corner and the Ultimate Weapon finishes Greene at 6:49.

Rating: C+. Another nice showing from Greene here but Bailey seems like he is on the way to the main event scene very soon. It would surprise me if he isn’t the World Champion by the end of the year and that means racking up wins in spots like this one. Greene seems like he’ll be fine as a nice hand on the roster and that’s a fine place to be.

Video on Josh Alexander vs. Bully Ray.

Hard To Kill rundown.

Joe Hendry/Jonathan Gresham/Rich Swann vs. Steve Maclin/Eddie Edwards/Moose

Before the match, Hendry says Hard To Kill is on Friday the 13th, but being up against Dancing Moose and his backup dancers makes you believe in Hendry/Gresham/Swann. Gresham and Edwards start things off….at least officially as Edwards tags Maclin in without doing anything. Gresham dropkicks the knee out and it’s Hendry coming in to crank on the arm. A suplex gets one on Maclin and it’s off to Swann to pick up the pace.

Edwards comes in and gets caught with a running hurricanrana before it’s back to Gresham and Maclin. Everything breaks down in a hurry and the parade of strikes sends everyone to the floor as we take a break. Back with Swann in trouble, including Moose pulling his hair and stepping on his head. Maclin grabs the chinlock, with Swann not even being able to jawbreak his way to freedom. The villains take turns beating on Swann until he manages a few shots to Swann.

Another good shot is enough to bring Gresham back in for the house cleaning. Moose manages to grab Gresham though and tosses him into a Blue Thunder Bomb from Edwards. Gresham gets in a kick to Maclin though and the hot tag brings in Hendry to fall away slam Maclin for two. Everything breaks down again and a parade of non-finishers sets up Moose’s spear to Hendry for the pin at 16:11.

Rating: B-. This is exactly what it should have been as they hyped up three Hard To Kill matches at once here. Moose pinning Hendry is the most effective outcome too, as it adds a bit of drama to the title match. They had a fast paced match too, making this about as good of a use of the main event spot as it could be.

Post match Edwards is left alone in the ring….and thunder sounds as the lights flicker to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. As has been the case for more than a few weeks now, Impact checks every box on a show. This show covered or at least touched on every Hard To Kill match, which isn’t the easiest thing to do in a two hour show. They nailed this one pretty well with enough good action throughout. Nice work here and I want to see Hard To Kill, which is the entire point of a show like this one.

Results
Heath b. Brian Myers – Wake Up Call
Savannah Evans b. Rosemary – Full nelson slam
Mike Bailey b. Anthony Greene – Ultimate Weapon
Steve Maclin/Moose/Eddie Edwards b. Jonathan Gresham/Rich Swann/Joe Hendry – Spear to Hendry

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – December 29, 2022 (Best Of 2022): That’s A Fair Description

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 29, 2022
Hosts: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s the final show of the year and that means we’re going Best Of. It has been a pretty strong year for Impact, as there have been quite a few stars coming and going, along with some rather awesome matches throughout. We’ll also get the Year End Awards, which are often rather fun. Let’s get to it.

Note that I’ll be posting the full versions of the matches shown rather than the clipped versions in the broadcast.

Opening sequence.

The hosts bid us welcome.

From Hard To Kill.

Impact World Title: Moose vs. Matt Cardona vs. W. Morrissey

Moose is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Cardona gets sent outside to start and Morrissey boots Moose down for an early two. Everyone winds up outside, with Moose powerbombing Cardona onto the apron. Back in and Morrissey hits some running splashes in the corner until Moose crossbodies him down. The middle rope chokebomb gives Moose two, with Cardona making the save. A bunch of Reboots rock the giants so Cardona goes up, meaning it’s a Tower of Doom for the big crash.

Moose takes Cardona outside for a hard whip into the barricade but here is Chelsea Green to dive onto Moose for a save. They head back to ringside where Morrissey runs them over and sends Cardona back inside. Cardona manages a Codebreaker to send Morrissey outside so Moose takes his place. For some reason Moose goes up top but gets shoved down hard through a table at ringside.

Someone sends in a prosthetic leg and Morrissey beats on Cardona with it. A quick Radio Silence gives Cardona two but he walks into a chokeslam to give Morrissey two. Cardona is right back up and hits a quick middle rope Radio Silence for another near fall. Moose is back in and gets rolled up for two but the referee gets bumped. Back in and Morrissey hits a powerbomb on Moose for no count so let’s bring in some chairs.

Moose hits Morrissey low for a breather and chairs him down, but Cardona is back in with chair shots of his own. Cardona gets caught by a chair shot from Moose though, drawing Green in to protect him. That lets Cardona get up and nearly chair her down again, only to have the replacement referee get bumped as well. The spear cuts Cardona down and the original referee counts the pin to retain Moose’s title at 15:57.

Rating: B-. This was about as good as it could have been as it was kind of hard to imagine a title change. Cardona was trying and they were going for the Cinderella story, but that is only going to get you so far when you have a dominant champion. Morrissey was just kind of there and this would have been a little more interesting as a one on one match, but it was still fine for a co-main event.

Also from Hard To Kill.

Knockouts Title: Mickie James vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Mickie is defending in a Texas Deathmatch, meaning Last Woman Standing, but a fall has to be scored to start the ten count. They lock up and go to the mat to start with James grabbing a very early rollup for two as the mind games are on. A hot shot cuts Mickie down and the Venus de Milo goes on, so Mickie taps out in a hurry to escape (that’s smart). It’s time to throw in some chairs (because doing that in the last two matches wasn’t enough) and Mickie manages to chair her across the back.

The golf club from earlier is brought out for a shot to Purrazzo’s ribs but she posts Mickie for a breather. They fight up the ramp with Purrazzo hitting a suplex on the stage, allowing her to roll an anvil case into Mickie’s face for the pin. Mickie is busted open but beats the count and they head back inside. A half crab sends Purrazzo to the ropes, which means nothing, but Mickie lets go and dropkicks her to the floor.

Mickie takes her chaps off so she can hit Purrazzo in the face with her braced knee. A table is brought in but Purrazzo sends her face first into it instead. It’s time for thumbtacks, because those are required these days. Mickie gets dropped onto the tacks for the loud screaming portion and some choking with the chaps are good for a submission. Purrazzo isn’t waiting on Mickie to get up and dives off the apron to take her down again.

Back in and Purrazzo gets smart by chairing Mickie in the legs over and over. For some reason Purrazzo goes up top, allowing Mickie to blast her in the head with a chair (though Mickie collapsing into the tacks takes away some of the positives). A Thesz press off the apron pins Purrazzo but here is Matthew Rehwoldt to help her up, which doesn’t count as cheating (I guess?).

Back in and Purrazzo hits the Queen’s Gambit through a table for the pin but Mickie is up at 8. Mickie is fine enough to grab a guitar….so Purrazzo hits her low, allowing Mickie to the Wrestlemania XXII finger lick. Ok then. The guitar hits Rehwoldt and the MickieDT plants Purrazzo for the pin. Just to be sure, Mickie covers her with a table and chair for the ten count to retain at 19:45.

Rating: B+. They got extra violent here and it played up their hatred, though the quick falls and submissions were a little strange (logical, but strange). Mickie retaining makes sense as you want your best going into the Royal Rumble, which really will be the best exposure the company has had in a long time. This was a heck of a fight and the right choice for the main event, though Last Woman Standing might have been a better call (as would dropping the finger lick thing, which was a weird callback).

We get our first award with Jordynne Grace winning Knockout of the Year. She’s rather proud of the hard work.

Here’s the Moment of the Year. From Rebellion.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Moose vs. Josh Alexander

Alexander is challenging and his son comes out with him in Alexander cosplay. They go nose to nose to start with Alexander taking him down for some knees to the ribs. The very early ankle lock sends Moose bailing out to the floor, where he yells at Alexander’s family. Alexander comes out after him and Moose gets in a cheap shot to take over for the first time. Back in and Alexander gets sent hard into the corner, where he ducks a chop and chops away.

That doesn’t work for Moose, who hits a heck of a dropkick to take over before dropping Alexander face first for two. They head outside again where Alexander gets in a posting, only to be sent hard into the barricade. Back in and Alexander snaps off a belly to belly suplex to put both of them down. Some running boots to the face rock Moose to send him outside again, setting up a running crossbody through the ropes to drop him again.

Back in and the C4 Spike is blocked so Alexander rolls ten straight German suplexes. Moose gets in a shot of his own though and the Sky High gets two. A pump kick staggers Alexander but he counters a crossbody into the ankle lock. The rope is grabbed so Alexander kicks him in the head, which just wakes Moose up. They chop it out until Moose hits a Rock Bottom for no avail. Back up and Alexander wins a slugout, setting up a C4 Spike for a very close two.

Another C4 Spike is blocked and Moose bites Alexander’s head. That’s enough to set up a top rope superplex for two more and Moose is frustrated. The spear is countered into a Styles Clash of all things and the ankle lock goes on. Moose rips the turnbuckle pad off to escape, allowing Moose to kick him low. Now the spear can connect for a VERY close two so Moose takes off the top turnbuckle as well. A buckle bomb into the exposed turnbuckle looks to set up another spear but Alexander cuts it off. The C4 Spike is enough to give Alexander the pin and the title at 23:50.

Rating: B. They got the result right, it came after a hard fought match, and Alexander is the champion as he should have been a long time ago. This felt like a pay per view showdown and Alexander won because he is the better man. Much like the previous match, I’m not sure how much drama there was here, but it was a great way to close up the show.

Mike Bailey is X-Division Star of the Year.

Kenny King isn’t happy with Bailey winning and wants to find out who Bailey really is. King is coming to Bailey’s home.

From Slammiversary.

X-Division Title: Trey Miguel vs. Ace Austin vs. Alex Zayne vs. Andrew Everett vs. Kenny King vs. Mike Bailey

Austin is defending and this is Ultimate X, with Everett taking the place of an injured Jack Evans. Tom: “This is the 47th Ultimate X match.” I don’t think that has the same zing that you think it does. It’s a big brawl to start with Bailey and Zayne clearing the ring so they can both go for failed climb attempts. With the two of them down, Miguel sends King outside and hits a big flip dive but has to cut Austin off.

Everett comes back in but Austin kicks Miguel and Everett down without much effort. Everything breaks down again and Everett German suplexes Miguel on the apron. The big dive drops the pile though and everyone is down on the floor. Back in and Zayne hits a running super hurricanrana on Everett, leaving us with Zayne vs. King. Bailey goes up but hits the Ultimate Weapon onto the pile instead of climbing, which doesn’t seem that bright.

A bunch of people go to the corner for a Tower Of Doom, with Miguel being smart enough to chill in the corner. Then he gives Zayne a super Canadian Destroyer, which doesn’t seem as bright as GOING FOR THE BELT. King, Austin, Miguel and Bailey all go up at the same time until Miguel and King are kicked down. Bailey and Austin hang on the top and slap away at each other but Everett goes above them, only to get headscissored down. Some kicks drop Austin as well and Bailey pulls himself up to win the title at 9:50.

Rating: C+. Ultimate X is one of those matches that sounds great on paper but it’s Impact’s version of the wacky ladder match: everyone does a bunch of stuff until someone shows enough intelligence to pull the belt down. Impact has been building towards Bailey winning for a long time now so this is about as good of an idea as they had. I’m not big on the guy, but at least it has been set up over the last few weeks.

The Motor City Machine Guns are the Tag Team of the Year.

From Slammiversary.

Honor No More vs. Motor City Machine Guns/Frankie Kazarian/Nick Aldis/???

Maria is back with Honor No More (Eddie Edwards/Matt Taven/Mike Bennett/Vincent/PCO). Aldis is billed as a former NWA World Champion. True, but you would think his two Impact World Title reigns might carry a bit more weight here. There is a mystery partner and it’s….Dixie Carter? Ah never mind as she’s here for a speech (shocking I know) and also to introduce…Davey Richards. Not a name I would have bet on, or one I wanted to see for that matter, but he’s a name from the past.

It’s a brawl to start with the Guns beating up the Kingdom until we settle down to Aldis suplexing Bennett. Vincent and Kazarian come in to slug it out before we get the battle of the Wolves. Well maybe in a bit as Edwards hands it off to Taven instead, meaning it’s a parade of beatings. Everything breaks down and Honor No More takes turns getting beaten up in a bunch of corners. Shelley finally gets sent into the corner for a bunch of running shots, setting up Vincent’s running Downward Spiral for two.

Taven’s moonsault sets up Just The Top for two but PCO’s De-Animator misses. Shelley fights out of the corner, including a double Sliced Bread to Vincent and Edwards, which finally allows the hot tag off to Kazarian. House is cleaned again before it’s off to Aldis for a bunch of right hands. Everything breaks down again and it’s the Dream Sequence to Edwards, followed by a big dive to Bennett. Taven busts out the Flight Of The Conqueror to take out the pile, leaving Edwards vs. Richards again.

Richards gets the better of things and grabs the dragon screw legwhip in the ropes. The top rope double stomp misses but Richards is fine enough to grab a leglock on Edwards. Everyone in Honor No More outside of PCO gets caught in a hold so it’s PCO making the save. A Vader Bomb gets two on Sabin but the PCOsault misses Aldis. The Michinoku Driver puts PCO down and Richards adds the top rope double stomp for two.

Maria gets up on the apron for a distraction but Traci Brooks (Kazarian’s wife) pulls her off for a right hand. Kazarian saves Traci from PCO and it’s a top rope Flux Capacitor to plant PCO for two. Cue Kenny King to go after Kazarian but D’Lo Brown makes the save with a heck of a Sky High. There’s a Low Down to make it worse and the Guns strike away at PCO. The Kingdom gets dropped as well and there’s the Cradle Shock to PCO….with Earl Hebner coming over the barricade to count the pin at 18:46.

Rating: B-. This was the wild match that the show needed as a big celebration of the company’s history. That is something that you have to have on a show like this and it worked well enough. It helps that the match was good, but this was all about the history and tradition and that was a success.

Joe Hendry thinks Moose is cantankerous, but if Moose wants to find him, just say his name. Say at Hard To Kill?

The Death Dollz are the Knockouts Tag Team Of The Year.

Bhupinder Gujjar is named The One To Watch In 2023.

From Impact, September 22.

Digital Media Title: Bhupinder Gujjar vs. Brian Myers

Myers is defending in a ladder match. Gujjar slugs away to start and hits a jumping knee to the face. A Samoan drop looks to set up the Gargoyle spear but Myers knees him out of the way. The first ladder is brought in but Gujjar dropkicks it into his face. Myers knocks him outside though and goes up for the title, only to be pulled down into a cutter.

Now the Gargoyle spear can send Myers into the ladder but the climb takes too long, as usual. The ladder is knocked into Gujjar and it’s time to bring in another ladder. Gujjar breaks that up and the other ladder is set up next to the first. They both climb with Myers being knocked off, only to come back up with a belly to back off the ladders.

That’s good for a crash out to the floor, where Myers bridges a ladder onto the steps. A powerbomb drops Gujjar onto the ladder but he’s still able to make the save back inside. Myers low blows Gujjar on the ladder though and then gets creative by duct taping Gujjar to the ladder. That’s enough for Myers to go up and retain at 12:20.

Rating: C+. This was a pretty run of the mill ladder match, albeit one with a creative ending. Gujjar continues to look good enough out there, but there is still something missing that is keeping him from breaking through to that next level. I’m not sure if this feud warranted a ladder match, but at least they had a decent one.

Anthony Greene is coming.

Decay is ready to take the X-Division Title from Trey Miguel. Crazzy Steve gets his shot at Hard To Kill as well.

Josh Alexander is Male Wrestler of the Year. Like it could have been anyone else.

From Bound For Glory.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Josh Alexander vs. Eddie Edwards

Alexander is defending and Edwards sends Honor No More to the back. Both of their families are at ringside to make it more personal. They fight over a lockup to start as commentary breaks down the difference in the color of their gear. Edwards hits a chop, which is enough to make Alexander double leg him down and hammer away. Alexander knocks him outside for a breather before they switch places.

A slingshot dive drops Alexander for a change but he’s right back up with the crossbody to the back to send them both outside again. Back in and Edwards snaps off an overhead belly to belly before sending him right back to the floor. One might think they are filling in time here. The floor mats are pulled back, which takes long enough for Alexander to fight back. A German suplex from the apron to the floor is blocked so Edwards hits a Diehard Driver on the exposed floor.

Back in and Alexander seems to be favoring his leg and the Backpack Stunner takes him down. The half crab goes on but Alexander makes the rope. Back up and Alexander starts rolling some German suplexes, even going through the ropes and hitting another on the apron. That’s still not enough to break it up and they go outside with two more German suplexes, setting up another one on the ramp.

They head back inside with Alexander hitting a powerbomb onto the knee for two, only to have Eddie come back with Deep Six for two of his own. The Boston Knee Party is blocked and Alexander goes old school with a Styles Clash. Alexander puts on an ankle lock, which is broken without much trouble.

Edwards enziguris him off the top but the referee gets bumped. Cue Kenny King for a low blow before he is taken out by security, allowing a second referee to come in. The Boston Knee Party gets two on Alexander and a tiger driver gets the same, leaving both of them down. Alexander’s nose is busted but he comes up slugging, only to get rolled up for two. Another Boston Knee Party is blocked and the C4 Spike retains the title at 28:04.

Rating: B. Definitely a good match but this never hit that next level as it was bouncing pretty hard off the ceiling above it. Edwards is a strong challenger to Alexander and just like in the previous match, it felt like he should have won here instead of coming up short. What’s the point of Honor No More if Edwards loses in the biggest match the team has had? Anyway, solid main event, but I’m not sure if it was worthy of the final spot on the biggest show of the year.

Video on Eddie Edwards vs. Jonathan Gresham.

Video on Bully Ray vs. Josh Alexander.

And now, the Match of the Year. From Impact, December 8.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Mike Bailey vs. Josh Alexander

Alexander is defending and runs Bailey over with a shoulder to start. Back up and an exchange of shoulders goes nowhere so they run the ropes, with Bailey scoring off a kick to the chest. A knee to the ribs puts Bailey down as well but he’s right back with the bouncing kicks to send Alexander outside. There’s the big running flip dive to keep Bailey in control as we take a break.

Back with Alexander driving some knees into the back and cranking on both arms. Alexander gets two off a backbreaker but Bailey dropkicks his way out of trouble. The back is fine enough for the running corkscrew shooting star press for two on Alexander. Not that it seems to matter as Alexander is back up with some rolling German suplexes. The ankle lock is broken up in a hurry though and Bailey kicks the arm. An armbar stays on the arm and Alexander can’t get out, leaving Bailey to hit a poisonrana.

We take a break and come back with Alexander working on the back some more. The C4 Spike is countered into a hurricanrana for two and Bailey kicks him down. Bailey misses the Ultimate Weapon but Alexander still can’t hit the C4 Spike. They crash out to the floor and Bailey kicks him off the apron. The running moonsault to the floor drops Alexander again and they go back inside to slug it out. Both of them fall outside again and we take a break.

We come back again (over thirty minutes in now) with Bailey snapping the arm across the top rope. The Flamingo Driver is countered into a torture rack slam though and Alexander slaps on the ankle lock. With that broken up, Bailey gets his feet up in the corner, setting up the Ultimate Weapon. Bailey suddenly remembers that he is supposed to have a sore ankle though and they’re both down. Back to back kicks to the chest keep Alexander down and a third second sets up moonsault knees to the same chest. Bailey, WITH THE BAD KNEE, is fine enough to try the bouncing kicks, earning himself more rolling German suplexes.

We take another break and come back again with Alexander getting the ankle lock in the ropes. Since that doesn’t count, Alexander goes with the Angle Slam as we’re told that Eddie Edwards vs. Delirious will be moved to next week. Alexander misses a moonsault but is back up to catch Bailey with a super Angle Slam for another double knockdown. The ankle lock goes on again and Bailey can’t flip his way out. Alexander even gets a grapevine but Bailey manages to make the rope.

They both go up top as we have four minutes left in the hour time limit. Bailey knocks him off the top and hits the Ultimate Weapon for two more. Back up and Bailey kicks away, only to have the Flamingo Driver countered into a Styles Clash. The ankle lock goes on again, sending Bailey to the ropes again. We have a minute left and Alexander hits back to back C4 Spikes to retain at 59:50.

Rating: B+. Well that came out of nowhere. This was the long, epic style match that you do not see on television in any promotion save for once in a very long while. These guys beat each other up and if you ignore Bailey’s still absurd selling issues, it was pretty awesome. Alexander takes out another name and they even surprised me by not going to the time limit draw in the end. Bailey will probably be back, but for now this worked rather well as a big time surprise.

Overall Rating: B+. This was a heck of a show as Impact gets to hand pick their best material of the year. The good thing is there was quite a bit of awesome stuff to pick from in 2022 as Impact had a sneaky good year. I know they have a lot more to cover and they’re still Impact, but there is something to this company and they are worth watching if you get the chance. That was on display here and it was a very good use of two hours.

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – December 22, 2022: Give Them The Main

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 22, 2022
Location: Charles F. Dodge City Center, Pembroke Pines, Florida
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We’re still getting closer to Hard To Kill and now it seems that a Tommy Dreamer vs. Bully Ray showdown is imminent. If there is one thing that this company has loved over the years, it is pushing the heck out of former ECW stars. Other than that, Jordynne Grace is getting ready to face Mickie James in what should be a heck of a pay per view Knockouts Title match. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: Deonna Purrazzo/Gisele Shaw vs. Death Dollz

The Death Dollz (with Taya Valkyrie) are defending and Jai Vidal is here with Purrazzo and Shaw. Jessicka powers out of a wristlock to start and then shoves her down again, meaning it’s time for Shaw to try. Shaw gets powered into the corner for a splash and it’s already off to Rosemary.

The Upside Down has Shaw in trouble but Purrazzo kicks Rosemary from the apron and the villains take over. Back in and Rosemary gets taken into the wrong corner for some stomping and a middle rope double stomp for two. The chinlock goes on for a bit but Rosemary is right back with an exploder. It’s a double tag to Jessicka and Shaw but everything breaks down fast. With Purrazzo send outside, Rosemary spears Shaw to retain at 5:40.

Rating: C. Completely watchable match here that gives the champs a win over some named challengers. The Knockouts Tag Team Titles still don’t feel like they mean anything, but at least they are getting some television time and the champs are winning. Now build up some real challengers and start putting together an actual division. Not likely, but at least there is a goal.

Mickie James comes in to see Jordynne Grace, her partner tonight. No matter what, just remember that tonight, Tasha Steelz is Mickie’s. Seems cool with Grace.

Deonna Purrazzo and Gisele Shaw both say never again.

Here is Sami Callihan for a chat. We have a bit of a problem, because getting rid of Eric Young didn’t get rid of the Design. He is sick of these beatings, so the Design needs to get out here right now. Cue the Design, with Deaner saying that Samuel is sick, because he mutilates himself for the love and admiration of these people. The truth is that these people don’t care about him and never will. Until Callihan realizes that, he will always be sick. The antidote is violence….and Sami wants to join the team? Angels: “Are you serious?” Sami says there is no Design without Sami softening Young up. Callihan gets beaten down again.

Josh Alexander arrives and Tommy Dreamer is waiting for him. Alexander doesn’t need to have the Dreamer vs. Bully Ray drama weighing over him so he forgives Dreamer. That doesn’t seem to do it for Dreamer, which shouldn’t be any kind of a surprise.

Mike Bailey vs. Yuya Uemura

They go technical to start until Uemura armdrags him into an armbar. Bailey is back up with a kick to the chest and we hit the half crab. A rope is quickly grabbed so Bailey kicks him down again, only to have Uemura hit a running splash in the corner. Uemura nails a dropkick into a belly to back suplex for two as we take a break.

Back with Bailey hitting a dropkick of his own to set up the running corkscrew shooting star press for two. More kicks set up the moonsault knees for two on Uemura but he grabs a double arm trap suplex. A hard clothesline gives Uemura two so Bailey rolls outside, only to get caught with a crossbody from the apron. Back in and Bailey shrugs off a German suplex, setting up a spinning kick in the corner. The Ultimate Weapon finishes for Bailey at 14:33.

Rating: B-. Usual rather nice Bailey match here, without the horrible lack of selling to bring it back down. Uemura is someone who has been popping up more often lately as his excursion continues and he certainly seems like a solid hand. Good match here, but you can feel bailey’s main event push coming and I’m not sure I have any desire to see it.

Post match Kenny King pops up on screen from the Arena Mexico to say he’s better than Bailey, so get used to it.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Hulk Hogan debuts on January 4, 2010. We can still talk about that?

The Major Players and Heath/Rhino argue over who gets the next Tag Team Title match. The Motor City Machine Guns come out of Scott D’Amore’s office and announce a four way Tag Team Title match at Hard To Kill, with the Bullet Club included too.

Next week: the Best of 2022.

John Skyler/Jason Hotch vs. Johnny Swinger/Zicky Dice

Hold on though as here is Bully Ray to interrupt Swinger and Dice’s entrance (meaning they bail fast). Ray beats up Hotch and Skyler instead, with Hotch being tied to the top rope. No match.

Ray wants Josh Alexander out here right now, even if Josh’s wife calls the shots. After saying he loves Josh’s wife’s Only Fans, Josh Alexander runs in with a chair for the save. Alexander cuts Hotch loose….and Hotch grabs him, with Skyler helping, so Ray can tie Alexander up instead. Cue Tommy Dreamer for the save attempt, only to have Ray hit him low. A piledriver knocks Dreamer silly and it’s ladder time to make it worse. Some chair shots to the ladder onto Dreamer leave Dreamer laying as Alexander isn’t pleased.

Post break, Josh Alexander rants to Scott D’Amore and wants revenge on Bully Ray. Let’s make Hard To Kill Full Metal Mayhem. Deal, but D’Amore is sending both of them home until Hard To Kill.

Steve Maclin vs. Rich Swann

Maclin wastes no time in hammering away in the corner before sending Swann flying. The stomping is on but Swann is back up with a running hurricanrana. A backbreaker cuts Swann off again though and we take a break. Back with Swann still in trouble and being sent face first into the corner.

Swann manages a kick to the head though and starts striking away for one. It’s too early for the Phoenix splash so Maclin rolls outside, only to get taken down by a running flip dive. It worked so well the first time that Swann tries again but Maclin is too smart for that. Maclin stays on him outside and it’s a double countout at 9:48.

Rating: C. That’s an interesting way to go, but Maclin going all insane and violent on his way to (hopefully) winning the World Title from Josh Alexander is a good concept. Maclin has felt like a bigger deal week after week and there is a good chance that he is going to be climbing the ladder in a hurry. Now just make it work.

Post match Maclin beats up the referee and goes after security until Swann makes the save. A lot of yelling/beeping ensues as they’re finally held apart. Violent rematch seems likely.

Eddie Edwards is sick of people coming after him, with Jonathan Gresham as the latest. Was what he did really so wrong? Alisha comes in to say he has to move on by winning, so Eddie says he will at Hard To Kill.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Mickie James/Jordynne Grace vs. Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans

Mickie and Steelz shove each other to start until Mickie takes her down with a Thesz press. Evans and Grace come in for a power off with Grace grabbing a choke. Evans drives her into the corner to knock Steelz to the floor and we take a break. Back with Grace still in trouble but Steelz charges into a raised boot in the corner.

Grace jumps over Steelz out of the corner and hands it off to James to start cleaning house. This lets commentary make UFC comparisons between Grace and James as Steelz takes James down for a chinlock. James fights up but it’s back to Evans to power her right back into the corner.

Steelz comes in again for another chinlock but James fights up for the second time. Evans misses a charge into the corner, though she is fine enough to grab a spinning belly to back. James sends Evans into the corner to crotch Steelz though and the hot tag brings in Grace to clean house. The MuscleBuster finishes Steelz at 14:47.

Rating: C+. This was a fine way to build towards James vs. Grace at Hard To Kill. It’s not like Steelz and Evans mean much of anything these days so having them lose a main event match is hardly some big defeat. Go with the result that makes sense and let the big match get some more attention, as Grace vs. James is feeling like a huge showdown.

Post match Grace and James yell at each other. James kicks her in the face and leaves to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Nice show here and the Grace vs. James feud is becoming one of the better things going in wrestling today. Keep giving them time and let them get to something special at the pay per view. I want to see how well it can go, as Impact has done a good job so far. Other than that, you have another step forward in Alexander vs. Ray and the continued rise of Maclin and Bailey. Your taste on the specifics might vary, but the stories are being told well. Good effort here and they hit the right points.

Results
Death Dollz b. Deonna Purrazzo/Gisele Shaw – Spear to Shaw
Mike Bailey b. Yuya Uemura – Ultimate Weapon
Steve Maclin vs. Rich Swann went to a double countout
Mickie James/Jordynne Grace b. Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans – MuscleBuster to Steelz

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – December 15, 2022: Believe In Human Resources

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 15, 2022
Location: Charles F. Dodge City Center, Pembroke Pines, Florida
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We are less than a month away from Hard To Kill and the title situations are rather interesting. We have the Major Brothers coming after the Tag Team Titles, Jordynne Grace vs. Mickie James set for a title vs. career match and Josh Alexander defending against Bully Ray. That’s a lot to build towards so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Eddie Edwards vs. Delirious

This was going to be last week’s main event but then Josh Alexander vs. Mike Bailey almost hit an hour so it was punted to this week. They go technical to start and that’s good for a standoff. Edwards can’t grab an O’Connor roll but he can chop Delirious down, only to have Delirious come back up with a leg lariat.

An overhead belly to belly cuts that off in a hurry though and Eddie can fire off more chops. Delirious starts running the ropes in that bizarre manner of his so Edwards kicks him in the face. A superkick drops Delirious hard and a tiger driver gets two. Delirious is able to reverse the cover into the cobra stretch but Edwards stacks him up for the pin at 6:33.

Rating: C. This was a pretty solid, technical match with Delirious being able to do his thing with someone as perfectly fine as Edwards. The style seemed to be pointing towards Edwards going clean, though that seems to be a rather fast change over for him. Good enough stuff here, which shouldn’t be shocking given who was in there.

Post match Eddie teases showing respect but plants him with the Die Hard Driver. Yuyu Uemura tries to make a save but gets beaten down. Edwards goes for Delirious’ mask….and Jonathan Gresham of all people comes out for the save. That’s probably a Hard To Kill match.

Josh Alexander was in the fight of his life last week with Mike Bailey, but tonight he is calling out Bully Ray. Scott D’Amore says not so fast because Ray is different than his other opponents. Tommy Dreamer comes in to apologize for being wrong about Ray but Alexander thinks Dreamer is working with Ray. Dreamer is aghast.

Bully Ray vs. John Skyler

A stoic Ray slams him a few times to start and hits a piledriver for the pin at 1:05.

Post match Tommy Dreamer comes out and talks about how the ECW chants mean history. Dreamer was the one person who believed Ray had changed, but now their friendship is done. If Ray wanted to make him look like a fool, good for him and they can just work together on Busted Open Radio. Dreamer goes to leave and Ray tells him to keep doing that, because Dreamer is just a jealous coward.

At the end of the day, Dreamer is a nobody. If D-Von walked in Ray’s shadow, Dreamer was ten feet behind them at all times. Ray is a bigger star than Dreamer everywhere they go. Ray says some people might call Dreamer a failure, which is enough to get him back in the ring. Oh and a few months back, of course Ray laid out Ace Austin and Dreamer believed him then too. Dreamer brings up his mom’s illness but Ray doesn’t care. As he cries, Dreamer seems ready for a fight but Ray walks away this time. This was as interesting as Tommy Dreamer and Bully Ray talking about their past was going to be.

Major Players vs. Decay

This is the fallout from a backstage altercation earlier today. Hold on though as Trey Miguel jumps Crazzy Steve from behind and spray paints his back. Not that it matters as Steve says ring the bell anyway, leaving Taurus to knock Cardona into the corner. Myers comes in to Taurus flips over him and hits an elbow to the face. The Players are sent outside for the big running flip dive from Taurus to send us to a break.

Back with Taurus fighting out of Myers’ chinlock and handing it off to Steve to clean house. The basement Downward Spiral gets two on Cardona with Myers making the save, meaning everything breaks down. Taurus is sent outside and the middle rope G9 finishes for Cardona at 7:54.

Rating: C. You put a team like Decay out there to lose to the Major Players, who seem like they are on the way to the Tag Team Title picture. You need to have them win something here and Decay made the better team look good, even with Trey Miguel getting involved. Now move on to the next big match for the Major Players, as they are already starting their momentum.

We go backstage for a contract signing between Mickie James and Jordynne Grace. It’s Grace up first and she says she’ll let her talking in the ring before signing. James says Grace is assuming the result at Hard To Kill but James has had moments against the all time greats. She is ready to sign but Tasha Steelz, with Savannah Evans, comes in to rant about how Mickie hasn’t beaten her. James vs. Steelz is teased but Grace wants in on this as well. Scott D’Amore makes it a tag match instead.

Last week, Mike Bailey got a hero’s welcome after his long match with Josh Alexander. Then Kenny King came up and spit water in his face.

This week, Bailey says he’ll face King in the ring, but he isn’t playing mind games.

Sami Callihan vs. Angels

The rest of the Design is here with Angels, who charges into a pop up powerbomb at the bell. A Design distraction doesn’t work very well as Sami strikes away and takes Angels to the apron. With that broken up, Angels hits a running STO on the apron to take over for the first time. Back in and Angels grabs a crossface, only to have Sami bite the hand for the escape. A brainbuster gives Sami two but Angels discus clotheslines him down. The frog splash connects for Angels but he misses a second. Sami grabs the Cactus Driver 97 for the pin at 6:55.

Rating: C-. This was indeed a Sami Callihan match as he beat up the lowest level member of the Design without much time to do it. Callihan is still going to need some help to fight the team off, but it’s still going to be a former World Champion against Deaner N Pals. How strong of a story is that going to be?

Post match Sami gets laid out.

Gisele Shaw pitches a reunion with Deonna Purrazzo, who isn’t interested. That lasts about ten seconds before Shaw talks her into going after the Knockouts Tag Team Titles.

Taylor Wilde looks at tarot cards and says she is a bit of everything. She is the Wilde Witch. Better than “person who was here ten years ago”.

Joe Hendry/Bhupinder Gujjar vs. Johnny Swinger/Zicky Dice

Before the match, Hendry talks about the noises coming from Swinger’s Dungeon. In Hendry’s Dungeon, all you hear is people saying WE BELIEVE. Hendry slams Dice down to start and slams Swinger for a bonus. Gujjar tags himself in but here is Moose to go after Hendry. That doesn’t go well, with Hendry drop toeholding him and grabbing the mic, saying he’s at work here. Moose grabs a chair and Hendry heads to the back, saying HR will hear about this. Back in the ring, Gujjar shrugs off a double team attempt and Gargoyle Spears Swinger for the pin at 3:14.

Rating: C. This was much more about the angle than the match and that isn’t a problem. Swinger and Dice not being able to beat up someone up on their own fits them perfectly and I could go for Swinger on a losing streak as he tries to get his fifty wins for a World Title shot. Moose vs. Hendry is an interesting way to go, though I’m not sure I can picture Hendry beating him so soon. Just let Hendry talk more though and he’ll be fine.

John Skyler sits down next to Jason Hotch and it turns out they respect each other. They might as well team up. Finger handshake!

Steve Maclin doesn’t like the lack of rules around here so to get the World Title, it should be by all means necessary. Rich Swann is next.

Tag Team Titles: Heath/Rhino vs. Motor City Machine Guns

The Guns are challenging and the Major Players are banned from ringside. Rhino shoves Shelley down to start so it’s time for some regrouping. Heath and Sabin come in to go technical, with Heath actually giving him a clean break out of the corner. An exchange of headlocks goes nowhere so Shelley makes a blind tag and helps double team Heath down to take over. Fans: “TAG IN RHINO!”

Heath gets sent into the corner for some double dropkicks but Sliced Bread doesn’t work for Shelley. A powerslam takes Shelley down but the diving tag is cut off as we take a break. Back with Rhino coming in to clean house and the champs take over on Shelley in the corner. Heath ties him in the Tree of Woe and stomps away, only to get sent face first into the middle buckle.

Rhino comes back in to cut off the tag and grabs a bearhug, which is broken up as well. Shelley rolls over and brings Sabin back in to clean house. A tornado DDT gets two on Heath but he breaks up Skull and Bones. The Gore gets two on Sabin but he reverses a second into a sunset flip for the pin and the titles at 16:49.

Rating: B-. They didn’t really have a choice here as, much like Heath and Rhino’s title reign in WWE, I don’t think there was any reason to think they were going to be the next big thing. They had their feel good moment with the win and now the Guns, a much more established team, gets the titles back. Solid main event and the exact right way to go.

The Guns celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a pretty nice show up and down, but that Bully Ray/Tommy Dreamer stuff is still a lot to stomach. They are still talking about their time together in ECW and it just makes the show feel old. Alexander vs. Ray should be pretty decent fight but the build on the way there is rather rough. Overall, another completely acceptable Impact show with its usual good points, but enough holding it back from being great.

Results
Eddie Edwards b. Delirious – Rollup
Bully Ray b. John Skyler – Piledriver
Major Players b. Decay – Samoan drop/middle rope Blockbuster combination to Steve
Sami Callihan b. Angels – Cactus Driver 97
Bhupinder Gujjar/Joe Hendry b. Johnny Swinger/Zicky Dice – Gargoyle spear to Swinger
Motor City Machine Guns b. Heath/Rhino – Sunset flip to Rhino

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – December 8, 2022: That’s A Surprise

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 8, 2022
Location: Old Paristown Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

The slow build towards Hard To Kill continues as we still have over a month to go before the show. That means a lot more Bully Ray, who dominated the first fourth of last week’s show and will probably be around again this week. Other than that, it might be nice to hear some more from the World Champion Josh Alexander, so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We look at Deaner killing Eric Young off last week.

Deaner talks about how Violent By Design is a movement, not a group of people. Now it is time to take out Sami Callihan.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Heath/Rhino

Heath/Rhino are defending. Rhino powers Sabin around to start but Sabin is up with a middle rope spinning crossbody for two. Heath comes in and gets his arm worked over but manages to send Shelley into the corner. Shelley charges into a raised boot in the corner, only to have Sabin twist Heath’s leg around the rope to take over. A dragon screw legwhip gives Sabin two and Shelley grabs the logical Figure Four.

Heath slaps his way out of trouble and gets to the rope, setting up a powerslam. Rhino and Sabin come in off the double tag to pick up the pace, with Rhino’s spinebuster getting two. Everything breaks down and Heath is sent outside, leaving Rhino to TKO Sabin for two more. Sabin takes out Heath’s knee again…and the Major Players come in for the double DQ at 8:30.

Rating: C+. This was starting to cook when the ending cut things off. The Players are a more interesting option right now and odds are this sets up a three way down the line. That isn’t the worst idea as the Players should have been Tag Team Champions a good while ago. Beating the popular champs and the Guns would be a nice way to get there, as this match showed what the other two can do on their own.

We look at Bully Ray going full villain on Josh Alexander and everyone else.

Alexander rants to Scott D’Amore and says he’s dealing with this his way tonight. With Alexander gone, Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in, with Swinger saying he wants a title shot. D’Amore says win fifty matches and it’s his. Swinger: “So you’re saying there’s a chance!”

Mickie James and Jordynne Grace have a tense but respectful photo shoot together.

Savannah Evans vs. Taya Valkyrie

Tasha Steelz and the rest of the Death Dollz are here too. Steelz powers her down to start as commentary makes Steiner Math references. Taya is knocked to the apron where she lands in the splits, only to be sent to the floor. We take a break and come back with Tay fighting out of a chinlock. A clothesline and Blue Thunder Bomb give Valkyrie two and it’s off to some weird double leglock. Taya switches into something like an STF but Evans grabs the hair to escape. A hard knee to the face rocks Evans, who is right back with a full nelson slam for the upset pin at 10:21.

Rating: C. Just when I had my “Evans never wins anything” loaded up, Evans goes and wins something. You do need to give her something like this every now and then, though it’s more than a little weird to see her beat someone as successful as Taya. Still though, interesting result that can do a lot more for Evans that it would have for Valkyrie.

Video on Ace Austin and Chris Bey in the New Japan Super Junior Tag League.

Moose attacks Bhupinder Gujjar as a message to Joe Hendry.

Delirious wants Eddie Edwards. The match is set for tonight.

Kon vs. Sami Callihan

The rest of Design (yes Design, minus the Violent By) is here with Kon. Callihan strikes away to start and pokes Kon in the eye to cut him off. Kon hits a hard shot in the corner and the stomping is on. A spinebuster lets Kon hammer away even more and we hit the nerve hold. Back up and Sami hits a running forearm for one but Kon pulls him outside. The chokeslam onto the apron rocks Sami again but he fights back anyway. The Design offers some distractions though and Kon hits a Death Valley Driver for the pin at 6:24.

Rating: C. This was ok, though calling it The Design and having a former member of the Ascension as part of the team in 2022 is a bit hard to grasp. Kon is an acceptable enough power guy but he isn’t likely to light the world on fire. Sami is going to need some help to fight these guys off and that probably doesn’t bode well.

Josh Alexander blows off Tommy Dreamer. He’s learning.

Trey Miguel spray painted his former pupil Jason Hodge on Before The Impact.

Miguel doesn’t find spray painting people, or the X-Division Title for that matter, disrespectful. Crazzy Steve comes in to say he paints with blood and Miguel seems to have a new challenger.

Here is Josh Alexander, in gear, for a chat. He wants to get out some of this aggression so it’s open challenge time, and he’ll even put the title on the line. So get out here Bully Ray, because he still has his Hard To Kill shot no matter what. Ray pops up on screen to make sure he understands everything. He’s busy right now though, as he is looking at photos of himself terrifying Josh Alexander and Alexander’s wife, so he’ll see Alexander at Hard To Kill. Instead here is Mike Bailey to say he’ll take the shot.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Mike Bailey vs. Josh Alexander

Alexander is defending and runs Bailey over with a shoulder to start. Back up and an exchange of shoulders goes nowhere so they run the ropes, with Bailey scoring off a kick to the chest. A knee to the ribs puts Bailey down as well but he’s right back with the bouncing kicks to send Alexander outside. There’s the big running flip dive to keep Bailey in control as we take a break.

Back with Alexander driving some knees into the back and cranking on both arms. Alexander gets two off a backbreaker but Bailey dropkicks his way out of trouble. The back is fine enough for the running corkscrew shooting star press for two on Alexander. Not that it seems to matter as Alexander is back up with some rolling German suplexes. The ankle lock is broken up in a hurry though and Bailey kicks the arm. An armbar stays on the arm and Alexander can’t get out, leaving Bailey to hit a poisonrana.

We take a break and come back with Alexander working on the back some more. The C4 Spike is countered into a hurricanrana for two and Bailey kicks him down. Bailey misses the Ultimate Weapon but Alexander still can’t hit the C4 Spike. They crash out to the floor and Bailey kicks him off the apron. The running moonsault to the floor drops Alexander again and they go back inside to slug it out. Both of them fall outside again and we take a break.

We come back again (over thirty minutes in now) with Bailey snapping the arm across the top rope. The Flamingo Driver is countered into a torture rack slam though and Alexander slaps on the ankle lock. With that broken up, Bailey gets his feet up in the corner, setting up the Ultimate Weapon. Bailey suddenly remembers that he is supposed to have a sore ankle though and they’re both down. Back to back kicks to the chest keep Alexander down and a third second sets up moonsault knees to the same chest. Bailey, WITH THE BAD KNEE, is fine enough to try the bouncing kicks, earning himself more rolling German suplexes.

We take another break and come back again with Alexander getting the ankle lock in the ropes. Since that doesn’t count, Alexander goes with the Angle Slam as we’re told that Eddie Edwards vs. Delirious will be moved to next week. Alexander misses a moonsault but is back up to catch Bailey with a super Angle Slam for another double knockdown. The ankle lock goes on again and Bailey can’t flip his way out. Alexander even gets a grapevine but Bailey manages to make the rope.

They both go up top as we have four minutes left in the hour time limit. Bailey knocks him off the top and hits the Ultimate Weapon for two more. Back up and Bailey kicks away, only to have the Flamingo Driver countered into a Styles Clash. The ankle lock goes on again, sending Bailey to the ropes again. We have a minute left and Alexander hits back to back C4 Spikes to retain at 59:50.

Rating: B+. Well that came out of nowhere. This was the long, epic style match that you do not see on television in any promotion save for once in a very long while. These guys beat each other up and if you ignore Bailey’s still absurd selling issues, it was pretty awesome. Alexander takes out another name and they even surprised me by not going to the time limit draw in the end. Bailey will probably be back, but for now this worked rather well as a big time surprise.

Overall Rating: B. This is a show where the main event was almost all that mattered as it took up nearly half of the show. They have a few weeks left before Hard To Kill and this was a way to burn a week off with a great main event without much in the way of major angle advancement. Good show here, even if it was just a one off change of pace.

Results
Heath/Rhino vs. Motor City Machine Guns went to a double DQ when the Major Players interfered
Savannah Evans b. Taya Valkyrie – Full nelson slam
Kon b. Sami Callihan – Death Valley Driver
Josh Alexander b. Mike Bailey – C4 Spike

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – December 1, 2022: I Think We All Know Who He Is

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 1, 2022
Location: Old Forester’s Paristown Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are back to the regular show after last week’s Thanksgiving special. That means we need to start getting ready for whatever the December show will be, plus Hard To Kill. The latter of these shows will likely be headlined by Bully Ray challenging Josh Alexander for the World Title, but we need something else besides that. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Bully Ray teasing being good and then going all evil as he goes after the World Title.

Here is Bully Ray, complete with the broken Call Your Shot trophy to get things going. He isn’t sure if these Kentuckians will understand him (to be fair, they are in Louisville) so he tries to keep it simple. Ray shows up at Bound For Glory, ran the gauntlet, and earned the title shot. He told Josh Alexander that he was coming for him on January 13 and they shook hands, with Alexander accepting the match. The fans chant for Alexander, which has Ray saying he agrees with these morons.

As great of a wrestler as Alexander is, he isn’t as smart as Ray. Maybe people have forgotten who he is. He ran Hulk Hogan out of Impact, he made sure Sting couldn’t challenge for the World Title again and he put Dixie Carter through a table. So why would Alexander let his wife get that close to Ray? Alexander is going to be gone for a few weeks, but he better be at Hard To Kill so Ray can win the title for the third time. Cue Rich Swann to jump Ray and start their scheduled match fast. Ray’s speech made sense and he can always talk, but Bully Ray as Impact’s top villain in 2022 is still not exactly a great image.

Bully Ray vs. Rich Swann

We’re joined in progress and Ray runs Swann over to cut him off. Ray hammers away in the corner and elbows Swann in the head as the ring has a weird echo for some reason. A sitdown splash misses for Ray but he’s fine enough to crotch Swann on top. The neck crank is countered with a jawbreaker and the middle rope 450 gives Swann two. That’s enough for Ray, who grabs his chain and blasts Swann for the DQ at 5:43.

Rating: C. Well at least Ray didn’t pin him clean. This was about continuing Ray as the biggest villain in the company and he does it well enough. Swann didn’t get in much offense here, but he has fallen quite a long way from when he was World Champion. Keeping this short was a smart idea and it did what it needed to do.

Post match Ray beats on Swann with a chair and zip ties him to the bottom rope. Tommy Dreamer runs out for the save but Ray shoves him down. Cue Scott D’Amore to yell at Ray and hit him with his suit jacket. Ray grabs the chair again but gets chased off by the combined forces of….D’Amore and Dreamer. Hold on though as Ray grabs the mic and agrees with D’Amore than he’s a piece of s***. Ray: “But you’re the guy who hired me.”

That’s about ¼ of the show and it has been all about Bully Ray so far.

Trey Miguel doesn’t care that people are unhappy with him and he spray paints his logo on the X-Division Title.

Moose vs. Bhupinder Gujjar

Moose is sent into the corner to start and Gujjar strikes away, even managing to send Moose outside. That works fine with Moose, who blasts him with a clothesline as we take a break. Back with Gujjar winning a slugout but getting planted right back down. A ripcord knee and Sling Blade look to set up the Gargoyle Spear…but Moose just steps aside. The spear gives Moose the pin at 7:53.

Rating: C. Moose needed the win to get back on track after the loss to Ray at Overdrive and Gujjar has enough status to make this mean something. Gujjar still needs a win of his own as his biggest claim to fame so far is almost winning the Digital Media Title a few times. Another good enough match, even if it didn’t need a break in the middle.

Post match Moose throws Gujjar outside and then talks about knowing what Bully Ray really was. These idiot fans wouldn’t listen to him though and no, he didn’t lose at Overdrive. Moose: “I don’t want any of you to say his name.” Cue Joe Hendry but Moose says he was talking about Bully Ray (of course). Hendry heard “say his name” and that is the same as someone saying WE BELIEVE. Moose wants Hendry out but Hendry, from a current champion to a former one, knows a cry for help when he hears one. The fight is on but Gujjar is back with the Gargoyle Spear.

Mike Bailey isn’t worried about Kenny King and nothing is changing.

Video on Mickie James and the Last Rodeo, as she is ready for Deonna Purrazzo tonight. Purrazzo is ready to end James’ career.

Steve Maclin vs. Frankie Kazarian

Maclin wins an early slugout but Kazarian is back with a springboard elbow to the face. That doesn’t last long as Maclin knocks him out to the floor in a heap and a running knee to the back makes it worse. Kazarian slips out of an Angle Slam though and some running forearms have Maclin reeling.

The chickenwing is blocked so Kazarian settles for the springboard spinning legdrop for two instead. The slingshot Fameasser over the middle rope keeps Maclin in trouble and he slingshots himself into a cutter for two more. Then Maclin hits him with a chair for the DQ at 7:20 (second of three matches to end with a chair shot DQ tonight).

Rating: C+. These two could have had a better match with more time but at least we got something out of them. Kazarian is one of the good hands around here as he can work well with anyone while Maclin should be next in line for the World Title. He has been built up well and with one big push, a title reign is far from out of the question.

Post match Maclin wrecks Kazarian, including the KIA on a chair.

Tasha Steelz rants about the Death Dollz winning the Knockouts Tag Team Titles at Overdrive and seems to blame Savannah Evans. That doesn’t work for Evans, so Steelz says we can do Evans vs. Taya Valkyrie next week.

Eddie Edwards is done talking about his marriage or PCO or anything in the past. He did everything to build for the future….and then runs into Delirious of all people, who stares at him.

The Motor City Machine Guns ask Heath and Rhino about their Tag Team Title shot. Heath says they’ll get it set for next week, which works for the Guns. Rhino talks about tearing their hearts out to amp up the insanity a bit.

Here’s what’s coming on upcoming shows.

Deonna Purrazzo vs. Mickie James

Feeling out process to start with Purrazzo taking her to the mat to start and working on an armbar. Back up and they trade armdrags into a pinfall reversal sequence. They both miss some kicks and it’s a standoff as we take a break. We come back with James taking her into the corner for some chops, followed by some rather hard rams into the turnbuckle.

That earns her a hard elbow to the face and more elbows to the chest give Purrazzo two. The chinlock goes on for a bit but Mickie is right back up with the hurricanrana out of the corner. A running kick to the chest gives James two but Purrazzo kicks her off the top as we take a break. Back with Purrazzo getting two off a brainbuster and grabbing the reverse chinlock.

That’s broken up and James sends her outside, setting up the Thesz press to the floor. A missile dropkick drops Purrazzo and a neckbreaker gives James two. The tornado DDT is blocked and Purrazzo’s pump kick gives her a near fall of her own. The Fujiwara armbar goes on but Mickie gets over to the rope fast enough. They trade rollups until James grabs the tights for the pin at 23:00.

Rating: B. This felt like a main event level match and while there wasn’t a ton of drama about James losing, it was a good journey throughout. The ending with the cheating from James is certainly interesting, as she might be getting more desperate to keep her career alive. I could watch these two wrestle multiple times and it would likely continue to be high quality stuff.

Post match Jordynne Grace comes out to praise James and issue the challenge for the title vs. career match at Hard To Kill. We’re on, and I wouldn’t be complaining about that headlining the show.

We go to the jail with Eric Young and Deaner looking at each other. Young says Deaner is in this thing to get rid of the sickness, which might be in this room. A knife is thrown on the table and they fight with Young narrating about the sickness. Young goes for the eye but Deaner busts him open and stabs him (with Young’s encouragement) to get rid of the sickness once and for all. The stable still isn’t very good but the lack of Young might help.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event bails this show out as it was only ok until then. Throw in Bully Ray dominating the first fourth of the show and Violent By Design getting the closing segment and this wasn’t the most thrilling stuff at the start and the finish. That being said, 20 minutes of Purrazzo vs. James works and it made the show a good watch.

Results
Rich Swann b. Bully Ray via DQ when Ray used a chain
Moose b. Bhupinder Gujjar – Spear
Frankie Kazarian b. Steve Maclin via DQ when Maclin used a chair
Mickie James b. Deonna Purrazzo – Rollup with tights

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – November 24, 2022: Turkeys Trotting (Thanksgiving Special)

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 24, 2022
Hosts: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

It’s Thanksgiving and that means we are in for a special Best Of show around here. That’s about as logical as you’re going to get for this time of year as there is no reason to believe that anyone is going to pay attention to a show on such a big holiday. You never know what you’ll see on something like this but let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

The hosts welcome us to the show and promise us some great Thanksgiving moments, plus a look at Overdrive.

We’ll start with Thanksgiving 2008, with Rhino pinning Alex Shelley in a triple threat match also involving Sheik Abdul Bashir. As a result, Rhino gets $25,000 and Shelley has to wear a turkey suit, as enforced by Mick Foley with threats of firings/bad history lessons.

Wrestlers say what they are thankful for (Joe Hendry is thankful for mirrors because he gets to see who he really is).

Deaner asks Eric Young if this is the end of Violent By Design but doesn’t get an answer. It’s time for an answer to the unanswered questions so they have to go back to where it all began. How about before that when the team doesn’t exist?

We go back to Thanksgiving 2007, at the Angle household, featuring Kurt and Karen as pilgrims and Jeremy Borash, Tomko and AJ Styles as guests (it was a weird time). They pray (with gold medals on the plates) and Styles eats during the prayer. People keep opening their eyes during the prayer, with Karen and JB making faces at each other. Robert Roode and Traci Brooks come in, as do James Storm and Jackie Moore (with beer). Chris Harris arrives and complains about the directions.

Eric Young shows up, a bit under dressed, and breaks a bunch of stuff. Kurt stands up to yell, revealing that he’s wearing the World Title, and sends Eric to the kid’s table (Eric gets lost on the way). Then the X-Division arrives, with Sonjay Dutt trying to get donations for starving children. Storm and Young get in a drinking contest and Styles leaves as Black Reign (Dustin Rhodes) and Rellik (that’s overused joke spelled forwards) arrive. Reign lets his rat Misty into the food and we take a break.

Back with Young and Storm rather drunk (Young has found a wig and they have both lost their shirts). Jay Lethal (as Black Machismo) arrives as Kurt looks like he wants some cyanide. Then So Cal Val arrives, so Lethal gives her his jacket to walk on. Kurt tries to restore order as Awesome Kong shows up and sits at the other end of the (really long) table. She eats food that may or may not be wax and, since there are a bunch of tables, Team 3D arrives, with food being thrown at them.

A bunch of people leave to get away from Team 3D, who were invited by someone other than Kurt. They sit at the kid’s table and take food from Kurt’s daughter, who says they suck (I would have paid to see her put through a table). Then Kevin Nash and Scott Hall arrive and Karen takes pies to the face. Everyone else shows up and the food fight is on. This was HILARIOUS in a wrestling way.

We look at Mickie James beating Taylor Wilde at Overdrive. Then Deonna Purrazzo comes out to yell at her and sets up the next match in James’ Last Rodeo.

From Thanksgiving 2016, loser wears a turkey suit.

Grado vs. Robbie E.

They slug it out to start with Grado getting the better of it off the snap jabs. A double clothesline puts both guys down as this is a little less funny than I was expecting. Robbie grabs a rollup for the pin at 2:39.

Grado is turkey suited.

We look at the end of Josh Alexander beating Kazarian with the C4 Spike to retain the World Title at Overdrive. Then Bully Ray came out, announced he was officially challenging at Hard To Kill in January, and beat up Alexander in front of his family. Then, with Alexander zip tied to the rope, Ray pulled Alexander’s wife over the barricade….and just threatened her because Alexander was loose. After the show, Ray grabbed the title but Rich Swann came out for the save. Scott D’Amore came out and threw stuff at Ray while asking what was wrong with him. Great segment. Why does it need to be Bully Ray and not someone new?

From Thanksgiving 2013.

Here are all of the winners of the matches tonight plus Velvet who is with Sabin. Roode points this out and Sabin throws Velvet out. Bobby asks everyone what they’re thankful for. Bad Influence is thankful for their intelligence and large endowment. Kaz is thankful that Park isn’t here to drink the gravy or fornicate with the pumpkin pie. Gail is thankful for being the prettiest and most dominant Knockout in the history of the company. Oh and her family too.

Sabin is thankful for his hair, being the best X-Division Champion ever and Velvet Sky. The Bro Mans are thankful for Mr. O Phil Heath, Zema Ion (officially part of the team) and for being the best team ever. Bad Influence: “I’m not sure about that.” Roode says the real Thanksgiving was last month in Canada and the fans will be thankful when he becomes the next champion.

It’s time to eat but here’s Angle to interrupt. He sees a ring full of turkeys, which are fighting words for the people in there. Roode challenges him to a fight which Angle accepts, and here’s his backup. Fernum and Barnes (a couple of losers who lost the Turkey Bowl) are still in the turkey suits. You can fill in the blanks yourself here: bad guys are destroyed, food is everywhere, Spud panics, turkeys fly. The good guys, Velvet and ODB celebrate to end the show.

More wrestlers are thankful for various things.

We look at Kenny King going after Mike Bailey at the overdrive pre-show and losing a six way match as a result.

King is going to take out Bailey before going after the X-Division Title.

From Thanksgiving 2017.

Team Edwards vs. Team Adonis

Eddie Edwards, Garza Jr., Allie, Fallah Bahh, Richard Justice
Chris Adonis, Caleb Konley, Laurel Van Ness, KM, El Hijo Del Fantasma

The loser of the fall wears a turkey suit and there’s food at ringside, along with Eli Drake. We’re not ready yet though as the teams sit down at the food tables as Drake insists that everyone has to put on the suit if they lose. He has a statement for JB to read, which pretty much just says everyone play nice.

Justice sticks his finger in Konley’s mouth to start and gets two off a rollup. Laurel comes in and jumps on Justice’s back so it’s off to the women for a change. KM and Bahh are up next with some shots to Bahh’s head taking us to a break. Back with Bahh crossbodying KM and bringing in Garza….WHO TAKES OFF HIS PANTS! I’m rather thankful.

Garza gets punched down though and it’s time for the heel beatdown. Adonis comes in for two off a legdrop and it’s time for a bearhug (on a guy with a bad shoulder). That goes nowhere and the hot tag brings in Eddie to clean house. Everything breaks down in a hurry and KM gets crushed between Justice and Bahh.

We get the big crash to the floor and Justice falls off the apron, only to be caught without much effort. Allie dives onto everyone to break up the pile and everyone is down. Back in and Adonis can’t grab the Adonis Lock, allowing Eddie to roll him up for the pin at 16:04, meaning Adonis gets to wear the suit.

Rating: C-. Oh what were you expecting here? This was all in good fun and nothing more than a comedy match. The match was just there for the sake of having a one off match for a holiday special and as a result, it’s really hard to be harsh on it. Adonis having to wear the suit is fine and it continues a (rather goofy) tradition. It wasn’t anything good, but it’s perfectly harmless.

Post break, Adonis refuses to wear the suit. Security actually stops him as the referee holds up the suit like an executioner’s ax. After a lot of persuading and a GOBBLE GOBBLE (One of us?) chant, Adonis finally puts it on and walks around a bit. Adonis isn’t cool with the chants though and the required food fight, with Adonis hitting Drake in the face with a pie, ends the show. This was actually entertaining as they just went with the simple comedy and it worked perfectly well.

Delirious and Yuyu Uemura yell at each other in….something and Japanese.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Steve Maclin wants the World Title but he is being held captive by his own company. From now on, it’s mayhem for all.

From Thanksgiving 2007.

Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Chris Sabin

This is the finals of the Turkey Bowl, with the winner getting $25,000 and the loser wearing the turkey suit. Joe and Sabin double team Styles to start and knock him to the floor. That leaves Sabin to take Joe down but a kick misses, giving us a staredown. Styles gets knocked to the floor again and we take a break.

Back with Sabin charging into a hot shot but Joe comes back in to punch Styles in the face. Styles breaks up the suicide elbow to Sabin though, meaning Joe punches him in the face some more. The drop down into a dropkick hits Joe and we take a break. Back again with Joe countering the springboard moonsault into an Air Raid Crash with Sabin having to make a save.

We take another break and come back again with Sabin hitting a springboard DDT to drop Joe. That earns Sabin a trip to the floor but Styles Peles Joe. The charge into the corner only hits kick to the face though, allowing Joe to hit the Muscle Buster for the pin at 9:33 shown (of the nearly thirty minute match).

Rating: B-. Well it seemed to be a good match, at least from what we saw of the thing. Joe was on another planet at this point and Styles was in his weird phase as Angle’s wacky goon, but it isn’t like he was going to be awful in the ring. Throw in a very talented Sabin and of course this was going to work, even if we missed almost twenty minutes.

Post match we cut to a livid Kurt Angle (AJ’s boss), storming out of his own Thanksgiving dinner. Back in the arena, AJ won’t put the suit on so here is Jim Cornette to order him to do it. After some coaxing, Styles (very slowly) puts the suit on so Tomko and Kurt come out to yell. Samoa Joe and the Outsiders come out to laugh at Angle and pals, meaning the brawl is on. The bad guys are cleared out, with Eric Young coming in to add a turkey leg to Angle to wrap things up. Then Hall got fired and Joe was given a live mic at the pay per view where he went on an all time rant against a lot of people.

Overall Rating: C. I never know what to say about these things, especially when it was a bunch of clips from what was little more than a comedy concept. There was a bit of decent action and it is fun to look back at some flashes of different times in the company’s history, but there was nothing worth seeing here. Granted that is kind of the point, but this was still a weird choice for a show.

 

 

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