Is it really an invasion angle if there’s no one left in the place you’re invading?
I’ve supported TNA for a long time and want them to survive, but this is into the so bad it’s funny territory.
Impact Wrestling – July 15, 2015: The Champ Has A Point
Impact Wrestling Date: July 15, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews
There isn’t much to go off from last week, but the big story is the reveal of the new authority figure, hand picked by Dixie Carter to keep her nephew and World Champion Ethan Carter III in line from letting all the power going to his head. Something tells me this won’t be the most thrilling announcement (because there isn’t a thrilling announcement out there) but maybe it’s better than I’m expecting. Let’s get to it.
The opening recap focuses on Ethan defending his title three times last week, followed by Dixie coming out and saying she doesn’t want the power to go to his head like it went to hers, because the segment was all about Dixie.
Dixie is in the ring to start things off with the roster on the outside. At least I don’t have to hear that stupid song all the way through again. She takes responsibility for the actions that led to her being put through a table last year and she’s sorry for what happened. It was a good thing when she went through a table and broke her back because it gave her a new perspective.
Dixie appreciates what the people in the ring go through and she’s sorry for everything she’s done. It’s time for a new chapter in TNA and she needs them to be a team. This feels more and more like a speech when there’s bad news than a promo. Ethan and Tyrus come out to protest but Dixie introduces Bully Ray as the new authority figure. Yeah that guy who tried to put your company out of business and the man who screwed you over at Lockdown a year and a half ago is a GREAT pick for your new boss. That’s of course forgetting the whole driving her through a table and breaking her back part.
Ray shakes everyone’s hand and starts talking about getting a call from Dixie, where she apologized for everything and said she wanted to do it right. Bully says he understood what she said and believed it, so today he’s back in front of real wrestling fans and the best wrestlers in the world. However, he’s back for the people around the ring, who he wants up on the apron right now.
Every single one of them is here to make this the best show around, no matter what Dixie has done to them. So that brings Bully to a decision, but it’s going to be the fans making the decision. The fans agree, so Ray thinks we should have a battle royal for the #1 contendership, which starts now.
So yeah, this was all about Dixie. I have no idea why I would want to care about her big redemption story, but this boils down to one thing: Dixie doesn’t seem to be a regular character again and that’s a good thing. Ignoring the lack of logic or proper storytelling and another heel champion vs. face authority figure story, and you have something good coming out of this. The promos were acceptable enough, but this isn’t going to set the world on fire, which is so often the case in TNA.
Battle Royal
Abyss, Austin Aries, Bram, Chris Melendez, Crazzy Steve, Drew Galloway, Eric Young, Hernandez, James Storm, Jesse Godderz, Kenny King, Khoya, Magnus, Mandrews, Manik, Mica, MVP, Norv Fernum, Robbie E., Shark Boy
This is joined in progress after the break and the winner gets a World Title shot tonight. Storm hides on the apron as Fernum is eliminated. Steve is put out as well with Mandrews quickly following him to the floor. There goes Shark Boy with Manik following. There isn’t much to talk about here, just like in most battle royals.
Magnus clotheslines Abyss out to almost no reaction, meaning Josh can plug the season finale of Barbecue Pit Masters. Melendez is out as the ring is clearing out a bit. Storm and Magnus are put out as we take a break. The lack of caring about two former World Champions being eliminated is striking.
We take a break and come back with only MVP, Galloway and Young remaining, meaning about twelve people were eliminated during the break. Drew gets double teamed for a bit until Young gets smart by eliminating MVP from behind. Eric loads up the piledriver but Drew reverses and kicks him in the chest for the win at 11:00. Josh: “Is Drew Galloway just one win away from being World Heavyweight Champion?” Well that’s how being #1 contender normally works.
Rating: F. Over half of the eliminations were during the break, which is almost guaranteed to be due to the Hernandez issue. The match was another boring battle royal anyway with very little of interest, but a lot of that was due to the people being thrown out off camera. Galloway winning is interesting though and should make him a main event guy, but instead it’s likely going to be a one off match on a one off show because TNA has made their new star for now with Carter.
Sting Hall of Fame video. This year’s inductee is announced next week.
Mr. Anderson talks about being 39 and not needing to risk an injury at the hands of someone like Bram, who doesn’t even care about his own well being. Anderson knows he can get to the dark places Bram likes to stay, but he doesn’t know if he wants to. This was more emotion than Anderson has shown in a long time and I liked it.
A depressed Rockstar Spud comes up to Bully in the back and isn’t sure what to do now. Ray asks him if he’s depressed about losing to Kurt Angle. Ray: “WE’VE ALL LOST TO KURT ANGLE!” Spud gets an X-Division Title shot in five minutes and Ray gets an unwanted hug.
Kurt Angle Hall of Fame video.
Eli Drake congratulates Drew on winning the battle royal. And of course Drake would never stab him in the back and cost him the shot right?
Before the X-Division Title match, here are some comments from Donald Trump on Mexicans, which Tigre Uno will respond to next week.
X-Division Title: Tigre Uno vs. DJZ vs. Rockstar Spud vs. Grado
Tigre is defending in yet another multi-man title match. I can barely remember the last one on one title shot for the belt. Grado uses the power of fat to control early on, prompting him to try to start a BELLY chant. No one can lift Grado either but he finally misses a backsplash so everyone can dropkick him down. That goes nowhere as Grado gets back up and hooks a neckbreaker for two on the champ. This isn’t the most interesting match in the world so far and it’s showing badly.
Grado and Spud take turns punching DJZ in the head but Grado keeps spending too much time winding up before finally elbowing him down. The two of them start fighting until Tigre springboards in with a dropkick, followed by one of the worst misses I’ve ever seen as Tigre’s Phoenix splash barely grazes Grado’s leg (he held his knee) but still gets the pin to retain at 4:05.
Rating: D. So let’s see: Grado is a fat guy who isn’t all that fat and does at least have charisma, has a gimmick that no one can slam him but he has a cult following. That leaves DJZ and Spud who are just kind of there, plus Tigre who had a horribly missed splash to end this wreck. No story, no real characters and no real reason for this to be happening. Well done TNA: you’ve killed what made people care about you.
Taryn promises to beat Brooke tonight as only the Dollhouse can.
Knockouts Title: Taryn Terrell vs. Brooke
Taryn is defending and chokes in the corner to start as Dinero thinks Terrell is the better Knockout because of her attire, despite it pretty much being the same as Brooke’s. Brooke comes back with a forearm but the Dollhouse pulls her to the floor for a beating. Another comeback is stopped with an elbow in the jaw, followed by another Dollhouse distraction to keep the champ in control.
A high cross body gets a pair of twos on Brooke. Taryn misses what looked to be a middle rope dropkick, allowing Brooke to make her third comeback in about six minutes. Some forearms connect but the Dollhouse interferes AGAIN to stop another comeback. There go the lights and here’s Gail Kim to run interference, allowing Brooke to hit a horribly botched Butterface Maker for the pin and the title at 7:35.
Rating: D-. After hearing Josh talk about the longest reign ever and all that jazz, it’s the female Billy Gunn getting the title? Brooke is one of the worst possible options for the title, but it’s becoming clearer and clearer that the division needs some fresh blood. Why is that always the case and why is it always the same batch fighting over the title?
Kurt Angle has given Bully Ray a great idea.
Here’s Angle to praise Ethan Carter III for being as talented as he is. Angle has no problem with the loss, but he has a problem with the way he lost the rematch. That’s why Angle went to Bully Ray with an idea: the rematch never took place, meaning there’s another rematch. However, that’s not going to be anytime soon because Angle has a tumor in his neck and is going to be out for a while.
Angle is ready to go but here’s Eric Young to interrupt. Young takes credit for the neck injury because of all the piledrivers over the last few weeks. Eric wants to be the one to put Angle out and goes all angry with some punches to trigger a brawl. Chris Melendez makes the save to break up a piledriver on the floor, only to take it himself instead. Josh is AGHAST that a Canadian doesn’t care about an American war hero.
Team 3D Hall of Fame video.
Due to Hernandez having to be edited out, here’s TNA’s replacement, from Slammiversary 2015. The clipped version airs here but this is the full review.
James Storm vs. Magnus
Unsanctioned so anything goes. They slug it out at ringside to start before heading into the crowd with Magnus taking over. Storm slams him through a table of food and grabs a beer bottle but stops to spit on the announcers, allowing Magnus to come back with right hands. They get back inside with a table being set up but Storm hits him low.
Magnus doesn’t seem to mind as he catapults Storm’s face into the bottom of the table for a unique spot. It’s off to the back of the arena again as a production guy repeatedly tells them that there’s high voltage back there. Magnus is thrown into a box and the video screen goes to a test pattern. That goes nowhere so they head back to the ring with the Eye of the Storm being countered into a powerbomb through the table for two.
Storm comes back with an Orton hanging DDT but stops to set up another table on the floor. Instead of putting Magnus through the table though, Storm yells at Earl Hebner, allowing Magnus to make a comeback. Magnus misses a top rope elbow through the table and crashes onto the concrete. That’s only good for two of course so Storm pulls out some powder.
Magnus comes back for like the tenth time but the powder goes into Earl’s eyes, meaning there’s no count off the Spine Shaker. Instead the Last Call gets two so it’s cowbell time, but Magnus hits another Spine Shaker for two. END THIS ALREADY! Now the cowbell connects and another Last Call gets another two.
Storm sets up two chairs with a piece of barricade bridged between. Magnus superplexes him through the barricade and, say it with me, it gets two. Both guys get bottles and connect at the same time with Storm falling on top for the pin (despite Magnus being on the barricade and therefore his shoulders not being on the mat) at 16:38.
Rating: C+. The match was trying but they went WAY too far and long out there as it was almost a copy of the Rusev vs. Cena match at Payback. Yeah they beat each other up a lot but I lost interest about halfway through. This felt like it was about four matches packed into one, but at least it was a fun brawl. The start was pretty lame though as they were just kind of walking around and trying to figure out what to do.
We see Storm’s promo on Magnus from after Slammiversary where Storm said he could find a woman to stand beside him against Mickie and Magnus.
Storm says there’s always room for one more in the Revolution. The partner will be someone very, very close to Mickie. Whoever it is calls Storm and he walks off to talk to her.
Carter and Tyrus come to see Ray (Ray: “I’ve got to get a door.”) because Ethan fought three times last week. Therefore, shouldn’t we postpone the match with Galloway for another week? Ray loves the input but shoots it down in less than a second. Carter needs to start acting like a champion.
TNA World Title: Ethan Carter III vs. Drew Galloway
Carter is defending of course. Feeling out process to start with Drew hitting a shoulder for little advantage. Some chops have Carter in a bit more trouble and chops against the barricade make it even worse. Cue the Tyrus interference though, drawing out Eli Drake (still on crutches) to even things up as we take a break.
Back with the champ in control and slapping on a chinlock. Carter’s chest is blood red from those chops. Drew fights up so Ethan grabs a front facelock but trips Drew’s leg for something like a reverse DDT. Not the most effective looking move in the world but at least it was different. A slap to the face just fires Drew up though and a top rope clothesline gets two. There’s a powerslam for the same with Drake cutting Tyrus off from making the save.
White Noise gets two more but this time Tyrus is able to get Carter onto the ropes. Back up and Galloway no sells some chops, only to have his elbow hit the referee in the face. Carter hits him low but here’s Drake to turn on Galloway anyway. Totally shocking swerve of course. Drake leaves and the 1%er retains the title at 14:20.
Rating: D+. Not bad but it’s clear that Carter can only do so much in the ring. That being said, it fits his character perfectly as he’s getting close to channeling the Honky Tonk Man mantra of “sometimes it’s better to be lucky than good.” The match wasn’t horrible but as Carter said earlier: if this is supposed to be a big match, shouldn’t there be more than about an hour and a half to build it up?
Overall Rating: D. This was one of their weaker episodes in a long time. Between the two horribly botched endings and the Slammiversary match eating up a lot of time, there really wasn’t anything to see here. Drew vs. Ethan could have been something interesting but instead it’s a one off match on a nothing show to set up Galloway vs. Drake, which should at least be entertaining. This really didn’t work with lame wrestling and very little set up for the future outside of Ray as the new authority figure. It could have been a lot worse, but this was a bad show.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Since it’s Memorial Day weekend, Destination America decided not to air a new episode of Impact (EVERYTHING IS FINE!!!). Instead, they’re airing a completely out of context pay per view from last year. That’s actually not a horrible idea, but somehow this is the only presentable pay per view they’ve had in the last year. That’s sad.
Slammiversary 2014
Date: June 15, 2014
Location: College Park Center, Arlington, Texas
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz
Time for another TNA pay per view which at least has been good in the last few years. The show has had some decent build, but due to a combination of injuries and TNA’s horrific marketing skills, the World Title match has been changed and there was no mention of the X Division Title match on television. The show does look good on paper though and we get the newest Hall of Fame announcement. Let’s get to it.
We open with the trio in the back with MVP saying he’s here to make sure Dixie doesn’t screw things up tonight. MVP can’t be out there with them though because of his knee.
Video on the history of TNA up to this point.
X-Division Title: Sanada vs. Tigre Uno vs. Davey Richards vs. Eddie Edwards vs. Crazy Steve vs. Manik
Sanada is defending and this is a ladder match. Also keep in mind that Destination X and Option C are coming up soon. Manik dives through the ropes to take out Sanada before the bell. The Wolves follow suit with stereo suicide dives and Steve has apparently knocked Tigre Uno down. Steve gets a ladder from under the ring and uses it to climb back to the apron. Tigre dropkicks him down and mostly misses a corkscrew dive to take everyone out.
Sanada and Manik fight over a ladder in the ring with the champion taking over via a springboard chop to the head. Tigre replaces Manik and kicks Sanada in the back of the head but the Wolves double team him into a German suplex onto the ladder in the corner. Edwards throws in a fresh ladder but Manik dropkicks both of them down. Steve (very popular tonight) comes in for the Terry Funk spinning ladder spot, taking down everyone that comes into the ring.
Manik makes a save but Steve shoves the ladder over, only to have Manik land on the top rope and dive out to knock out the Wolves. Steve goes up again and touches the belt but of course loses his hand eye coordination since this is a ladder match, allowing Sanada to make the save. The ladder is busted so Sanada slams Steve onto it to set up the moonsault. The fans think this is awesome as Tigre enziguris Sanada off a better ladder.
Tigre wedges the broken ladder into the standing one to form a bridge, but the Wolves catch him in a powerbomb/top rope Backstabber combo. The Wolves both go after the belt but Sanada makes the save. Edwards Sanada clothesline each other to the floor and Eddie crashes into the barricade, leaving Davey on top. Manik makes the save and powerbombs Davey onto the bridged ladder in a SCARY landing. Sanada climbs up to retain at 9:40 before someone dies.
Rating: B-. The match was fun but some of those spots looked too dangerous for my taste. Richards getting powerbombed was way too scary looking and I didn’t like how he landed. Hopefully everyone is fine, but I question having people go through a match like this without even giving the match hype on TV.
The announcers explain the World Title situation. For once this is totally beyond their control.
Here’s the trio with MVP on crutches to insult Texas A&M and the fans for booing him. They shouldn’t be so angry at him while he’s here against doctor’s orders. Dixie has gone to the Board of Directors in an estrogen filled moment of insanity, resulting in him being censored. MVP explains the World Title situation to the live crowd and says he won’t be involved in either qualifying match. King and Lashley promise to win their matches, unlike Texas A&M.
Samoa Joe vs. Bobby Lashley
Winner goes to the title match tonight. Lashley quickly takes Joe into the corner but gets enziguried in the other corner to give Joe control. Bobby leapfrogs over the Samoan and clotheslines him down, only to have Joe pound him down with strikes. The Facewash is loaded up but Bobby rolls to the floor to get a breather. You don’t go outside on Joe though and it’s the suicide elbow to take Lashley out again.
Joe gets cocky for a split second and Lashley is able to send him into the steps. Back in and Lashley fights out of the corner Rock Bottom with a swinging neckbreaker for two. A snap suplex sets up a nerve hold on Joe and an elbow to the face stops his comeback cold. Another nerve hold is broken up by a kick to the head and the backsplash gets two. Now the release Rock Bottom looks to set up the Clutch but Lashley drives him into the corner. Joe has to stop himself from running into Earl Hebner, allowing Bobby to nail the spear for the pin at 8:50.
Rating: C+. This wasn’t bad with Lashley getting one of his biggest wins since coming back. Putting Joe in the title match didn’t make a ton of sense after Lashley beat Eric on Thursday so this was the best option all things considered. I’m still not wild on Lashley’s in ring work, especially the spear due to so many people using it, but he could be worse.
The Carters have a party suite above the arena. Dixie thinks Ray will see Ethan’s vicious side tonight. Dixie won’t comment on the meetings she had this week until she’s in the middle of the ring. The only hint she’ll give is that the karma that got to MVP is nothing compared to what’s coming. Spud looks like the Joker.
Magnus vs. Willow
Bram and Abyss are the seconds here. Magnus stomps away in the corner to start and avoids a baseball slide to send Willow into the steps. Back in and a big clothesline gets the same for the Brit. There’s a buckle bomb for good measure and Magnus hammers away on the mask. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Willow fights back with an atomic drop and the legdrop between the legs for two.
The Twist is countered but Magnus runs into two boots in the corner. A middle rope splash gets two for Willow before Magnus avoids the Swanton. Bram tries to interfere but Abyss is right there to hammer away. All four guys start brawling on the floor until Willow goes up top and just jumps backwards onto the Brits.
Now Abyss and Bram fight in the ring with the Monster easily throwing him to the floor. The guys in the match get back in as Bram gets his metal bar, only to be one upped by Janice. They walk up the ramp as Magnus breaks up the Whisper in the Wind, setting up a belly to back suplex into a side slam for the pin on Willow at 10:00.
Rating: C-. This was a mess for the most part but not bad. They would have been better off making this a tag match to get everyone in there, but that seems to be where they’re headed anyway. The Willow gimmick isn’t doing anything for me either as the announcement that it’s Jeff Hardy just killed the whole point of the character.
Here’s Kurt Angle to announce the newest Hall of Fame inductee. Angle talks about how being in the Hall of Fame means you’ve earned respect forever from the boys in the back and the fans. The inductee is……Team 3D in a bit of a surprise. A loud and long WE WANT TABLES chant goes up and we go to a wide shot of the arena for some reason.
Bully can barely get a full sentence out as the fans are chanting WELCOME BACK. They accept the induction because of every single one of the fans. D-Von says he wasn’t going to come back to TNA but if he’s going out, he has to be by Bully’s side after all their history together. Catchphrases and poses close out the segment.
Ethan Carter cuts a good promo about how he’s beaten all the members of the TNA Hall of Fame so tonight he gets to beat the latest. This isn’t Von Erich Country anymore because the Carters have taken over.
Austin Aries vs. Kenny King
Winner goes to the cage match tonight. Aries hits the corner dropkick less than thirty seconds in but King escapes the brainbuster and gets to the floor. The top rope ax handle puts King down again but King crotches him on top to get a breather. A dropkick puts Austin on the floor and King sends him hard into the barricade for good measure.
They head inside again with King hammering away before putting on something like a seated abdominal stretch. Aries fights up and smacks King’s ears to put him on the floor, setting up a suicide dive. King is thrown back inside so Aries can ram him over and over into the buckles, setting up a missile dropkick for two.
King comes back with a cradle suplex and a high kick but gets caught with his feet on the ropes. The Last Chancery can’t get the submission so King comes back with a springboard Blockbuster for a close two. Aries gets tired of dealing with King and takes him into the corner for a super brainbuster to send Austin to the cage at 10:04.
Rating: C+. This is the logical choice as King hasn’t really shown that he can beat a guy of Aries’ level in a one on one match. The ending sequence was really cool and it gives us a more intriguing main event than Eric vs. two members of the trip. Aries is a guy that could be brought up the ranks in TNA to fill in their lack of top faces.
JB introduces some Dallas Cowboys to a VERY mixed reaction. After that mention is over, JB brings out the latest Von Erichs: Ross and Marshall, accompanied by an ancient looking Kevin. The Bro Mans interrupt and say that a lot of things in Texas aren’t tight, including being a Von Erich. Robbie isn’t here for reasons not specified.
Bro Mans vs. Ross Von Erich/Marshall Von Erich
Marshall wrestles barefoot like Kevin did. This is DJZ and Jesse for the team tonight. Marshall cleans house on DJZ to start but can’t hook the Claw. A powerslam puts DJZ back down and it’s off to the older Ross for some dropkicks. Jesse breaks up something off the top rope and DJZ hits a nice flip dive to take Ross down on the ramp.
Back in and Jesse nails a dropkick bur Ross avoids a second one and makes the hot tag to Marshall. Everything breaks down and Ross hits a missile dropkick to put both guys down. Jesse brings in a chair but gets it dropkicked into his face, setting up a series of basic double team moves from the brothers. Not that it matters as DJZ brings in the chair for the DQ at 5:07.
Rating: D+. Well that was a waste of pay per view time. The Von Erichs looked ok at best but it’s clear that they need ring time more than anything else. They didn’t know how to finish a match yet and it looked like they needed to get through a bunch of spots instead of bringing the match to a close. Not terrible, but the ending really didn’t work for me.
Post match Kevin comes in to put the Claw on Jesse, drawing the only big pop from the crowd.
Angelina says she’ll keep the title tonight. JB asks how many time Angelina has won the title without Velvet’s help but Angelina says they’re a team.
Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Angelina Love
Angelina is defending and Gail won a triple threat on Thursday to set this up. Gail hits a quick running forearm to start but her top rope huricanrana is countered with a powerbomb. A side slam gets two on Kim and Angelina throws her out to the floor. Velvet interference doesn’t help as Kim sends Love knees first into the steps. Back in and Gail gets crotched on the top, setting up an ugly looking reverse bulldog for two.
Sky uses the hairspray but referee Stiffler ignores it. The Botox Injection gets two and here’s Earl Hebner to eject Sky and make himself referee. Gail speeds things up and gets two off a neckbreaker but gets powerbombed for two more. Kim accidentally dropkicks Earl in the back but nails Eat Defeat. Stiffler ignores the cover to check on Earl and does the same again when Love gets rolled up. Angelina reverses into a rollup of her own and Stiffler counts the pin to retain the title at 6:57.
Rating: D+. Egads this story is getting old. Didn’t we have Stiffler in love with the Beautiful People like five years ago? Nothing to see here for the most part as Gail vs. Angelina has been done on PPV so many times that they ran out of stuff to do years ago. The match was ridiculously overbooked. Also don’t we already have a questionable referee in Brian Hebner?
D-Von has to go back to the hotel for dinner with his kids. Bully cuts a promo on Texas wrestling legends and thinks Ethan is in way over his head. His advice to Ethan: start praying. Ethan gets crucified for the sins of his Aunt Dixie and he’ll be baptized in blood.
Bully Ray vs. Ethan Carter III
Texas Death Match, meaning last man standing. Ray brings out a bullrope ala Stan Hansen for a nice tribute. Carter is thrown to the floor by the rope to start and Ray brings out a pair of tables. They’re stacked next to each other on the floor but Carter recovers from the coma he was in to get in a few shots and take over. Ray fights right back and sets up another table in the corner but the fans want cowbell.
Carter avoids the table but gets his chest ripped off by more chops. Time for the cheese grater to rip up Ethan’s chest (barely), which isn’t something you often see. Carter gets in a few shots to take over and sends Ray face first into a chair on the mat. He goes up top but gets crotched and superplexed onto the chair to put both guys down. Ray grabs a Dallas Cowboys trashcan from under the ring before starting to cut up the mats to expose the wood under the canvas.
Joker Spud comes out with a kendo stick shot to Ray’s back for no effect. Ray kicks him low and knocks Spud silly with the stick but Carter hits a quick One Percenter onto the exposed boards for our first count over twelve minutes into the match. Ray is up at eight so Carter pours out the glass in the trashcan. Carter goes up but dives into a Bubba Cutter, sending the injured chest into the glass for a cool spot. He’s up at eight though so Ray takes the stick outside to knock Ethan silly again.
Ray puts him on the tables and goes up but here’s Dixie for a distraction. Bully goes after her and sends Ethan into Dixie to knock her out cold. Ethan gets punched down and Ray puts Dixie on the table. He takes too long though, allowing Spud to pull her off and Ethan knocks Ray through the tables with a kendo stick shot for the win at 17:05.
Rating: C. It was a nice brawl with some nice spots but NO ONE CARES ABOUT DIXIE. After all this, if she doesn’t go through a table in New York, this whole story has been a huge waste of time. Also, never accept an induction to the Hall of Fame unless you want to lose on a last second fluke the same night. At least D-Von didn’t join forces with Dixie.
We recap Anderson vs. Storm. This started in a qualifying match for a World Title shot before Anderson cheated to win a drinking contest and made fun of cowboys. Why TNA thinks he’s going to be cheered in Texas doing this is beyond me.
Mr. Anderson vs. James Storm
Storm grabs a mic even though it’s 10:22 and we’ve got another match after this. He rips on the Cowboys because he’s a Titans fan but the booing breaks up his catchphrase. The brawl is on before the bell with Anderson high fiving the Cowboys and spitting beer in Storm’s face. They get in the ring for the opening bell and James goes right for the knee. A few shots have Anderson so banged up that he can’t run across the ring and a Figure Four has him in even more trouble.
Anderson is quickly in the ropes and Storm misses a charge in the corner to give Mr. a breather. Storm gets crotched on the top and slammed down for two, only to send Anderson face first into the middle buckle. Now it’s Anderson going up but getting kicked in the back of the head. He’s still able to pick Storm up for the rolling fireman’s carry off the middle rope but Storm kicks him out to the floor. Storm spits beer at the Cowboys so they jump the railing for a distraction, allowing Anderson to hit the Mic Check for the pin at 5:25.
Rating: C-. The match was short due to time but it was still entertaining enough. Anderson vs. Storm didn’t need the Cowboys for this to work but since it’s a midcard match in TNA, I’m sure we’ll get 19 rematches to keep things going way after its expiration date. The Cowboys might get them some extra media attention if nothing else.
Austin Aries tells Eric Young that the greatest man should win the match tonight. Eric says they’ve flown in crazy people to the show tonight.
We recap the main event, which is just an Eric Young video due to the last minute changes.
TNA World Title: Austin Aries vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Eric Young
In a cage with Young defending with wins by pin or submissino, not escape. Lashley takes over to start but gets double teamed down. The smaller guys do a fast paced sequence until Lashley throws Aries into the cage. Young gets the same as well, allowing Lashley to stand tall. Bobby throws both guys around again but misses a charge into the post. Young and Aries go at it again until Eric hammers on Bobby in the corner.
Aries powerbombs the champion down but stops to go after Lashley again, only to be suplexed into the cage for two. We get a bad looking botch as Aries hits a running cross body in the corner but Young just lets him bounce off of him for some reason. Young gets to show off his freakish strength with a double Death Valley Driver but Lashley is up at two. He puts Young on top of the cage as the fans chant please don’t die. Aries goes up top as well to take Lashley down with a hurricanrana, but Eric stands up on top of the cage for the huge elbow to Bobby.
Aries punts Eric in the head though and hits the brainbuster for a very close two. Lashley spears Austin down for two and spinebusters the champion, only to miss the spear and fall out of the cage. Remember that doesn’t end the match though as escape doesn’t count. Young hits the top rope elbow on Aries for another close near fall. The piledriver is countered with a low dropkick to Young’s face and everyone is down. Young and Aries slug it out but both guys miss forearms. Aries hits some discus forearms and the corner dropkick but walks into the piledriver to retain Eric’s title at 12:10.
Rating: B-. This got better near the end but Eric keeping the title made me roll my eyes. The reign has been far better than I expected it to be but he needs to be the focal point of the company instead of the other guy in the major feuds. To be fair though, I’d assume MVP was supposed to take the title tonight before the injuries.
Young helps Aries up after the match.
Overall Rating: B-. As usual, TNA puts on a good show for Slammiversary. I really wish they could get their stuff together on TV because if this was what they were putting out there every week, things would be so much easier to sit through. Instead we’re usually stuck with one story dominating a show or 19 Dixie Carter segments with her bad acting talking about whatever war she’s having that no one cares about. Good show but not as good as the last few years’. Nothing blew the doors off but most of the matches were solid and nothing was bad so I can’t complain much.
Results
Sanada b. Crazy Steve, Manik, Eddie Edwards, Davey Richards and Tigre Uno – Sanada pulled down the title belt
Bobby Lashley b. Samoa Joe – Spear
Magnus b. Willow – Belly to back suplex into a side slam
Ross Von Erich/Marshall Von Erich b. Bro Mans via DQ when DJZ used a chair
Angelina Love b. Gail Kim – Rollup
Ethan Carter III b. Bully Ray when Ray couldn’t answer the ten count
Eric Young b. Austin Aries and Bobby Lashley – Piledriver to Aries
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Impact Wrestling – May 8, 2015: Coming Attractions
Impact Wrestling Date: May 8, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentator: Josh Matthews
For the first time in weeks, we actually have a special episode. This is airing live from Orlando with the promise of a former World Champion returning in the first five minutes. Other than that we have Kurt Angle defending the World Title against Eric Young to probably blow off their feud. Let’s get to it.
Eric Young is in the ring to start and promises to win the title back tonight. This brings out the returning World Champion and it’s Bully Ray, who will referee Angle vs. Young. Eh cool but it’s nothing earth shattering. It doesn’t help that it’s for Angle vs. Young which is just a placeholder until Cater challenges Kurt.
We get the opening recap video. They’re treating this like a huge show.
Here’s Ethan Carter to talk about the democratic process which has lead us to a gentlemen’s contest: arm wrestling. This brings out Mr. Anderson to show us the results: falls count anywhere wins with 85% of the vote. Shocking indeed.
Mr. Anderson vs. Ethan Carter III
This is billed as falls count anywhere but the rules make it sound hardcore. Anderson quickly sends Carter and Tyrus to the floor but the big man gets in some cheap shots. That’s fine with Anderson who sends Tyrus into the post and chases after Carter as he tries to get away. We get the first weapons brought in as Anderson pulls out a bunch of chairs to pile up on the floor.
A Mic Check onto the chairs doesn’t work so Carter backdrops Anderson onto the ramp for two. Carter makes the mistake of spitting in Anderson’s face, earning him a Regal Roll onto the chairs for two. Back in and Anderson hammers away before planting Carter with a swinging neckbreaker. Tyrus comes back in to earn his check with a t-bone suplex and a corner splash. The spike to the throat puts Anderson down for the pin at 5:39.
Rating: C-. Well that was quick but they were smart to keep this quick given how obvious the booking seems to be. Young is a guy who could bounce right back after all these losses so why not feed him to Carter to get us on the fast track to Angle vs. Carter? Everyone knows that’s where it’s going so why not just keep this quick?
Bully Ray likes the look of Angle’s World Title.
Gail Kim goes up to Awesome Kong and asks if they’re on the same side tonight. Kong walks away.
Quick recap of BDC vs. the Rising.
Here’s the BDC, wearing masks during their entrance, with something to say. MVP holds up his mask and says it belongs to Homicide, but he can’t be here tonight because someone blindsided him on his way back here, sending him to the hospital for surgery shoulder. Now he’s not saying the Rising did it, but they must know something about it. MVP goes on a rant about the American government taking foreign oil fields and being cheered, but when the BDC tries to take something, they’re called thugs. That’s a new word for something censored, which was probably a racial term given how MVP was going.
Cue the Rising, who says they fight in a ring instead of the streets. Think about it though: a man called Homicide isn’t the most endearing person in the world. The Rising had nothing to do with the injury, but maybe it was someone closer to home. Where was Kenny King last night for example? MVP says he doesn’t care about wrestling. It’s all about the money and power that comes with the job. Drew cares about workrate but MVP cares about interest rate. Wasn’t MVP the one who came to TNA to make things better for wrestling? MVP wants a match right now so let’s do it live. The brawl is on and we take a break.
MVP vs. Drew Galloway
Joined in progress after a break with MVP choking on the ropes and bending the arm around the ropes. A slam off the middle rope gets two and they trade big boots with Drew’s knocking MVP outside. Drew follows him and gets slammed head first into the barricade for a loud thud. Back in and the Playmaker is countered into the Futureshock to give Drew the pin at 4:45.
Rating: D+. The match was watchable but this is one of the least interesting feuds I can remember in a long time. They’re doing the right things, but there’s just nothing to make me care. The (maybe) racist part could be interesting and feels like Corgan’s first story addition. It’s not likely to make me care about the feud, but the wrestling and promos have been fine. I just don’t care.
Post match Eric Young (in CRAZY pink) comes in and helps the BDC beat down the Rising with a chair. Despite Young being an associate of the team when it formed, this is treated as a surprising turn of events.
James Storm is here with a present for a special friend. They should just call him Christmas because he’s always giving.
The preview for next week is all about Kurt Angle and asks who’s next. I know that’s a Destination America ad but it’s almost guaranteeing that Angle retains tonight.
Here’s James Storm with his present. He can talk about being tough and drinking beer, but it’s time to give someone else the spotlight. This brings out Mickie James to a very nice ovation, but Storm wants to talk about her being a mother. Everyone should love their mother, but Storm quickly switches over to Mickie’s music career. She’s an amazing mother, wrestler and singer, but she’s also a great friend. He holds up the box and it’s a new guitar. Storm tries to sing a bit but Mickie politely shakes her head no.
They take a picture together (not a selfie Storm) and here’s Magnus with a forced smile. Storm has a gift for him too: the spiked helmet from the Brutus Magnus days. Magnus and Mickie leave but Storm pulls out a blanket for their son Donovan. That’s too much for Magnus, who comes back in and breaks the guitar over Storm’s head. Like a truly creepy man, Storm starts smiling. They are NAILING this story and Storm is making it awesome. How can he be the same guy that led the worthless Revolution?
Eric Young wants the BDC to have his back to deal with Bully Ray tonight.
We go backstage at Robert Irvine Live (Gail Kim’s real life husband and a celebrity chef) where Taryn Terrell shows up. Gail gets in her face and that’s about it.
Gail Kim/Awesome Kong vs. Dollhouse
Jade jumps Gail to start but gets thrown down by a hurricanrana, so it’s off to Marti vs. Kong. Everyone but Taryn comes in and the Doll House is thrown into the same corner and splashed by the monster. We settle down to Marti hitting a running faceplant on Gail, setting up a cannonball from Jade for two.
Marti slams her down for two but it’s off to Jade, who is very slowly slammed down onto Gail’s knees. Kim’s Black Widow is broken up by Taryn but Gail dives over for the hot tag. The Dollhouse has to save their boss from an Implant Buster and everything breaks down. Jade takes an Implant Buster but Taryn counters the Eat Defeat on Marti with a rollup for the pin at 5:32.
Rating: C. This was fine and the right ending as I’m still loving Taryn and the Dollhouse as a whole. They’re setting up the big blowoff with Gail vs. Taryn, but I’m hoping we don’t get another Gail title reign. We’ve been there time after time and I don’t see what else she can do with the title.
We look at Jeff Hardy breaking his leg and see Matt holding both Tag Team Titles.
Magnus asks Mickie to have nothing to do with James Storm anymore. Mickie isn’t thrilled and leaves.
Here’s Matt Hardy to address the Tag Team Title situation. Jeff is going to be healing for a long time, so as of right now, the titles are vacant. That means it’s time for Matt to go home and figure out what’s next for him.
As he leaves, here are Bobby Roode and Austin Aries with something to say. Aries hasn’t forgotten Young putting him on a stretcher to send him out of the Impact Zone on a stretcher. That brings Aries to another piece of gold: the World Tag Team Titles, which seem to have a curse on them. Yeah they’re constantly being vacated, but that sounds like an opportunity. He and Roode have held the Tag Team Titles and didn’t get hurt, so Roode thinks the titles should be defended by two of the best wrestlers in the world today.
This brings out Davey Richards, who says no one has fought more battles for those belts than the Wolves. Aries likes the idea, but there’s no team in front of him. Not quite says Davey, because Eddie Edwards is back. Eddie has been cleared to wrestle and who better to start against than Roode and Aries? That’s fine with them, but Eddie wants to one up it: a best of five series. Hands are shaken and the series is on.
After a break, Matt Hardy goes to leave but Drew Galloway stops him to offer him some food for thought: things are changing a lot and he could use a good man.
Angelina Love is in the ring to talk about being asked everything going on lately. However, she just wants to talk about herself because she’s the only Beautiful Person around and the best Knockout ever. Cue Velvet Sky because these two are cursed to be around each other for all eternity. Velvet looks…..sleepy. Anyway, Angelina sucks up to her but Velvet, now with pink/purple highlights and a left arm tattoo sleeve doesn’t say anything. Instead it’s a spear to start a catfight as the fans are going mild. Security breaks it up.
Recap of Young beating Angle in a stretcher match last week.
Young asks Ray if he’s going to be the next one to stab him in the back. Ray says he’s just here to referee.
TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Eric Young
Bully Ray is refereeing and Angle is defending. Josh on Angle: “If anything ever happened to Captain America, Kurt Angle could easily be an Avenger.” A quick belly to belly puts Young down but he fires off some elbows in the corner to take over. Eric is sent to the apron so he runs to the top, only to have Kurt run the ropes and superplex him down. The BDC is watching from the stage as we take a break.
Back with Young getting two off a neckbreaker and choking in the corner. The chinlock slows Angle down for a bit before Angle fights up and wins a slugout. Now we hit the rolling Germans before the ankle lock sends Eric to the ropes. Kurt won’t let go so Eric rolls Angle out to the floor. A CRAZY low blow puts Ray down and the BDC starts triple teaming Angle.
This brings out Chris Melendez and the Rising to help Angle before fighting to the back. Young loads up a piledriver on Ray but gets backdropped down, setting up the Angle Slam for two on Eric. Why there hasn’t been a DQ called yet isn’t clear. Eric hits a quick piledriver for two but goes up for a cross body, only to have Angle roll through into the ankle lock to retain at 14:33.
Rating: C. The match was ok but the most obvious ending ever and an unnecessary brawl in the middle didn’t do it any favors. Now hopefully we can get away from the Young vs. Angle story and get on to Carter taking the title at Slammiversary because I never want to see Eric get another title shot.
Angle poses on the stage for a long time and no one attacks him to end the show.
Overall Rating: C. Good enough show this week but it’s really nothing memorable. Ray coming back is cool, but they would have been better off by not announcing it as a former World Champion as Dixie’s clues made it a pretty obvious reveal. The Sky return was the same obvious swerve, which doesn’t leave a lot going on here. This was basically a preview for what they have coming, which is fine as it’s the start of a new cycle, but there wasn’t much to see here.
Results
Ethan Carter III b. Mr. Anderson – Pin after a spike to the throat from Tyrus
Drew Galloway b. MVP – Futureshock
Dollhouse b. Gail Kim/Awesome Kong – Rollup to Kim
Kurt Angle b. Eric Young – Ankle lock
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Here’s another major award with some last minute entrants.
We’ll start with the frontrunner for most of the year, mainly due to its build up: the Wyatt Family vs. the Shield at Elimination Chamber. These two teams had looked dominant for months coming up to the match and they finally stared each other down. It’s one of those moments where you just knew it was going to be great and then they blew the doors off the place at Elimination Chamber.
Daniel Bryan vs. HHH from Wrestlemania is way up there and the ending was perfect with HHH getting to chuckle at all the fans (myself partially included) who thought he would put himself into the title match. This isn’t something that’s going to hold up though, as it’s good but the show’s booking hurts it a bit. At the end of the day, there was no way Bryan wasn’t winning here, which brings things down. It’s still great, but I can’t say it’s the best match of the year.
We even get a TNA entry with the ladder match in the Tag Team Title series. I know Full Metal Mayhem gets the attention because it was the final match, but the ladder match was just a hair better. This was back to the TLC formula of take six guys and let them break a lot of stuff, including their bodies. It’s a total stunt show and that makes for some very entertaining matches.
I know this one wasn’t universally popular, but I have to mention WeeLC from Extreme Rules. When WWE does comedy well, it can be some of the funniest stuff you get. They NAILED this one and made what could have been the worst idea in history into something hilarious that was a highlight of the night. This isn’t really a serious contender but man alive it was funny.
Back to the first major show of the year with Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt. Here we have two guys just beating the tar out of each other for over twenty minutes in an outstanding opener. Wyatt beat Bryan, but it’s a match where the winner really doesn’t matter. Bray has so much potential, and the fact that he can back it up in the ring is a very important point.
I can’t go with Team Authority vs. Team Cena as a nominee but I’ll throw it in as an honorable mention. The last ten minutes actually had my heart beating fast and not being sure of what should have been a sure thing. Throw in Cena going out halfway through the match and it gets even better. Great match, including STING, but I’m not sure if it’s one of the best of the year.
What I am sure of though is how amazing Sami Zayn vs. Cesaro from NXT: Arrival was. These guys just know how to make things work with Sami as the ultimate underdog and Cesaro being able to do insane power moves that just blow your mind. It’s a hair beneath the 2/3 falls classic, but they got in most of the same spots and Cesaro going into Beast Mode at the end. He doesn’t go there often, but when he goes to that place, I see the superhero that people say is inside him.
It’s been too long since we’ve had a Shield match and HHH might bury me if I don’t mention him, so I’ll throw in Shield vs. Evolution in the elimination tag at Payback. They let the match go for a long time until we finally got to an elimination so the pin was a surprise. This was the old standard of let six guys beat the tar out of each other for half an hour with the young guys hitting one high spot after another and making the big comeback because the fans actually want to see them do it. In other words, they built up the drama and paid it off at the end. Wrestling 101 still works if you can believe that.
Now we’ll go to the other end of the spectrum with Bully Ray/Rockstar Spud vs. Austin Aries/Bobby Roode from One Night Only: Jokers Wild II. In short, this is the funniest match I’ve ever seen and you should watch it yourself. The key here: you can tell the guys in the match came up with the comedy themselves. Instead of inserting them into “funny” situations, the comedy flows naturally because it’s stuff that these people would logically do that is still funny. Over in WWE you see people doing things that are only being done because a script tells them to do it.
That brings us to the winner, which was the only match all year that I had to see. The build was perfect, the go home promo was perfect, the match was perfect, the execution was perfect, the aftermath was perfect, yet for some reason I only gave it an A. The match is of course Sami Zayn vs. Adrian Neville for the NXT Title at Takeover: R-Evolution. It’s a strong contender for Show of the Year and it was capped off by the Match of the Year.
TNA One Night Only – Victory Road: Is Impact On?
Victory Road Date: December 5, 2014
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Taz, Mike Tenay
We’re still doing these things for some reason and yet again it’s a bunch of qualifying matches for a gauntlet later in the night. These things are almost interchangeable as they’re either a gauntlet match or a tournament of some sort and they’re really getting old. In this case the winner gets $50,000 and a future World Title shot, which I’m sure will be remembered later. Let’s get to it.
The opening video shows everyone in the competition tonight over a slow song. There isn’t much to say about this one.
There’s no thirty minute intro this time. All matches are qualifying matches for the gauntlet.
Kenny King vs. Austin Aries
Feeling out process to start with King going for the leg to escape a wristlock in a nice counter. Aries rolls out of a wristlock as well and grabs a headlock, only to have King send him off and nip up before rolling outside for some reason. Back in and they speed things up with a headscissors taking King down and setting up a basement dropkick. King sends him out to the floor for a crash before slapping on a chinlock back inside. In case you’re wondering the announcers’ first totally off topic discussions are about Taz kicking people in Texas and Tenay having wanted posters in casinos.
King puts on another chinlock and mocks the Austin Aries chants as things slow down. A knee to the ribs puts Aries down but King misses a slingshot knee. Aries rolls to the apron and runs Kenny from buckle to buckle about ten times in a row. This is accompanied by the announcers making fun of Southwest Airlines. King bails to the floor and takes a top rope ax handle to the head, setting up a running elbow for two back inside.
Aries’ missile dropkick gets the same but Kenny blocks the brainbuster attempt. Austin wins a slugout but walks into a spinning kick to the face for two. The Royal Flush is countered and Aries blasts him with the discus forearm, followed by the corner dropkick and the brainbuster to send Aries to the gauntlet.
Rating: C+. Nice match here, assuming you can ignore all of the horrible commentary. King is a guy that can have a good, athletic match more often than not, even though most of his stuff here was based around chinlocks. Aries was doing his usual stuff but the fans ate it up, which is the entire point.
The Wolves are ready for their singles matches tonight because sometimes they hunt in packs and sometimes they hunt on their own.
Davey Richards vs. Bram
Taz about Christy: “She was late. That’s a thing guys don’t like saying about women.” Bram shoves him up against the ropes to start and knocks him down with a clothesline. Davey comes right back with a low bridge to the floor, a baseball slide and a missile dropkick to put Bram down. Back in and some kicks to the chest have Bram in even more trouble as Tenay and Taz are talking about going to the mall and yogurt shop. A belly to back suplex puts Davey down again and we hit the chinlock.
Davey gets stomped to the floor as Bram is having a great time hurting him. Off to another chinlock before Davey grabs a sunset flip, only to pop up and hit a quick double stomp. Back up and Davey nails his handspring into a kick to the chest followed by a release suplex for two. The top rope double stomp misses but Davey gets two off a rollup. Davey is all fired up but Bram pulls the referee in front of a charge to stop a charge, allowing him to nail an implant DDT to pin Richards.
Rating: C. Another decent match here with both guys looking solid. Bram is a guy that has a good look and can back it up in the ring, which I’m sure is why he’s been stuck feuding with Tommy Dreamer and now Al Snow. I still can’t get behind Davey as a singles guy but the Wolves are good enough as a team.
Kazarian and James Storm are teaming up later to face the Menagerie. Storm yells about having to face a freak show, which he calls a one hit wonder. Kazarian says he was the first man in the gauntlet and the last man out at the first Victory Road. This is when Storm is just an evil cowboy, meaning he’s not quite as entertaining yet.
Menagerie vs. Kazarian/James Storm
It’s Freak/Knux here with Knux starting off against Kaz, who slaps Knux in the face to start. We get a chase scene on the floor before Knux kicks his head off back inside. Knux has to fight out of the heel corner but Storm kicks him in the back of the head to take over. James comes in legally and hammers away as the fans freak out over something. Back to Kaz to rip at Knux’s face in the corner. Tenay and Taz are of course talking about Rebel.
Knux scores with a powerslam and the hot tag brings in the Freak. Storm is thrown around with ease as Tenay thinks Knux’s mask is a black and white cookie. A Jackhammer plants Kaz down and we get an old school double noggin knocker. The heels try the Wrestlemania V ending with Kaz playing Heenan but Freak just muscles Storm off. Not that it matters as Kaz breaks the beer bottle over Freak’s head and the Last Call sends them both to the gauntlet.
Rating: D+. Standard tag match here but I like that they’re mixing things up instead of just doing the same singles matches throughout the night. Storm and Kaz going on to the main event is the right idea, even though Kaz was almost gone at this point. It’s also a problem when Storm is a totally different character now but here he’s doing the old cowboy stuff.
Video on Lashley, who is listed as the champion here.
Bobby Lashley vs. Samoa Joe
Lashley doesn’t have belt as he comes out, which makes far more sense for this show. Joe gets shoved into the corner to start before Lashley gets behind him and throws the big guy down. A shoulder doesn’t send either guy down and Lashley tells him to bring it. Taz is actually offering some analysis here, meaning he’s likely running a high fever. Lashley gets pounded down in the corner and takes the Facewash, only to take Joe’s head off with a clothesline.
A series of crossface shots gets two on Joe and a suplex gets the same. Off to a nerve hold and Taz actually explains why it should work. Joe fights up and hits a big boot followed by the backsplash for two. A middle rope dropkick gets the same and Lashley is in trouble. There’s the Clutch but Kenny King comes out for a distraction, allowing Lashley to get out of the hold and spear Joe down for the pin.
Rating: C. When Joe is motivated, he’s as fun of a guy as you’ll find in TNA. When he’s just going through the motions though, it can make for a long match. It was more towards the latter here as there was no fire in Joe, but to be fair, can you really blame him? He hasn’t done anything outside of midcard stuff in like six years but we’re supposed to buy him as meaning something here? I still don’t get why he doesn’t get a bigger push.
Mr. Anderson vs. Abyss
Anderson jumps him on the floor to start and sends him into the barricade. He drives Abyss into the apron and fires off right hands before slamming Abyss face first into the barricade again. Now the bell rings as they get inside and Anderson hammers away in the corner. A big back elbow drops Anderson and Abyss drives fists into Anderson’s head.
The announcers debate which meal they saw Abyss at as he cranks on Anderson’s neck. Anderson avoids an Earthquake splash but his regular splash hits knees. Back to the neck crank for a bit before Mr. fights up with a spinwheel kick, only to have the Mic Check blocked. A quick chokeslam is enough for Abyss to advance.
Rating: D. I really was expecting more from a pair of former World Champions. This started quick and ended out of nowhere with Abyss just hitting his secondary finisher for the pin. Anderson is very much like Joe, in that he just hasn’t had anything important to do for a long time.
The BroMans are excited about winning the money because DJZ needs a mail order bride, Jesse wants a home gym and Robbie might buy a bunch of hampsters.
Here are the BroMans for their match and one of their opponents is…..Spud. The Brans mock Spud for trying to compete until his partner comes out to back him up.
BroMans vs. Bully Ray/Rockstar Spud
If this is half as great as the previous match with Ray and Spud, it’s going to be a classic. Before the match, Ray has something to say to the BroMans. He makes Spud stand in the corner and says he doesn’t like him, but he likes the BroMans even less. Therefore, he and Spud can team together for one night only. Ray says the fans have to convince the referee, which takes all of two seconds, and we’re ready to go.
Spud of course starts on the apron as Jesse poses at Ray. The fans want Spud and Ray is nice enough to give them what they ask for. We get more posing from Jesse, sending Spud right over to tag Ray, who facepalms as a result. Taz thinks Ray and Spud will split the winnings 40/10 tonight. Everything breaks down and the good guys do a double Flip Flop and Fly with Spud losing his mind, thrusting both the air and the mat and Ray just looks on in awe. Ray finally drags him over to the corner by the ear but gets beaten down by both BroMans.
A double clothesline puts the BroMans down as Ray really doesn’t seem that worried. Some Bionic Elbows drop the BroMans and Spud plays D-Von in What’s Up on Robbie. Spud is all dizzy as Ray slaps his chest for the tables, only to knock Spud down to the mat by mistake. It’s table time and Spud comes back with a pink kid’s table and Ray is stunned.
Spud tries to climb on it and crushes the thing, allowing the BroMans to get in some cheap shots. DJZ throws in a real table but Ray suplexes both BroMans down. Ray pulls DJZ in and pulls up his underwear, only to have Spud turn on Ray by nailing him with the chain. The BroDown sends the BroMans to the gauntlet.
Rating: C. This was fun at times but they just killed the crowd with the ending. Spud and Ray are one of the best comedy teams in the company but instead of going with the fun ending, they go with the storyline ending that no one wants to see. Granted no one was watching this show in the first place so it doesn’t matter as much.
Spud yells at Ray post match and of course gets powerbombed through the table.
Gunner thinks tonight is a great opportunity and can’t wait to get another chance at Magnus, who he almost took the title from earlier in the year.
Magnus vs. Gunner
The Brit grabs the arm to start as the fans just go silent. A front facelock into a headlock puts Gunner down before a back elbow to the jaw sends Magnus to the floor. Things slow down a bit with Gunner chasing after Magnus and getting shvoed off the apron and into the barricade. Back in and an elbow to Gunner’s shoulder drops him again and we hit a camel clutch.
That goes nowhere so Magnus rams him into the barricade for the standard non-effect. A slingshot suplex plants Magnus and a running knee to the chest gets two. Both guys try cross bodies and go down as Tenay can’t figure out what HSM means (Human Suplex Machine). Gunner gets crotched on the top and superplexed down for two. Magnus walks into a slam but raises a boot to stop the flying headbutt. Back up and Magnus tries a sunset flip but Gunner drops down ala Davey Boy Smith for the pin.
Rating: C. The match wasn’t bad but again, as I’ve said a few dozen times in this series, there’s no reason for me to care about these guys. One guy gets into the gauntlet and another doesn’t and they had a watchable match to get there. Nothing much to see here but it was an acceptable match.
Ethan Carter III and JB say “sup” a lot and Carter isn’t worried about Sanada. More sups are dropped.
EC3 video.
Ethan Carter III vs. Sanada
This could be interesting and Sanada isn’t evil yet. Before the match, Carter says he’s fluent in Japanese. Sanada says something in Japanese and Carter “translates” and I’m sure you know where this is going. Sanada finally calls him a stupid idiot and starts an idiot chant to get the match going. Some chops put Carter down and Sanada rains down right hands in the corner, only to get caught in snake eyes for two. Taz complains about eating bad Mexican food as Carter chops the skin off Sanada’s chest.
Sanada comes back with chops of his own and stomps Ethan down in the corner. The crowd dies as Ethan sends Sanada face first into the middle buckle to take over again. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Carter just slams him face first into the mat. Back up and Sanada grabs a hurricanrana followed by three straight springboard chops to the head for two. A missile dropkick sets up the moonsault but Sanada jams his knee, allowing Ethan to nail the 1%er for the pin.
Rating: C-. Anytime I get to hear Ethan’s song twice in a row, it’s a good day. Carter continues to be one of the major bright spots in the company and Sanada is no slouch either. Unfortunately this match had to take place at this show instead of somewhere that, you know, matters.
Bram is ready for the gauntlet because he’s here to hurt people.
Samuel Shaw vs. Crazzy Steve
OH COME ON NOW. They really need to have THIS match on the card to fill in time? There was nothing else that could have taken these few minutes instead of making us sit through this? Eh at least I get to look at Rebel twice in a night. Shaw misses a charge to start so Steve gets right down in front of him to mimic Shaw’s pose. Knux offers a distraction to send Shaw flying over the top as the crowd is dead again.
They fight over balloons but Shaw stops to look at Rebel. That earns him a bite to the leg until Samuel throws him off to the side with ease. A clothesline puts Steve down and about 18 fans think Shaw is creepy. Shaw chokes on the ropes and screams in a high pitch until Shaw floats over and hits some headbutts to the chest. Steve stops his comeback to get the balloons and dives into the side choke for the submission.
Rating: D-. They just fought over balloons. Get to the next match please.
The BroMans are are excited about the match and Robbie has already spent what sounds like millions. Jesse, somehow the smart one of the team, has to explain reality to him.
Tigre Uno vs. Eddie Edwards vs. DJZ
Feeling out process to start as everyone locks up with everyone. DJZ wants to stop for a second and we get a three way lockup. Now we get a three way headlock until Tigre dropkicks DJZ to the floor, only to have him pull Edwards out with him. Back in and Tigre bounces into a hurricanrana to take DJZ down but the spiky haired one comes back with a headscissors.
A spinwheel kick drops DJZ again and a Mysterio sitout bulldog has him in trouble. Edwards comes back in with a double missile dropkick before chopping Tigre in the corner. DJZ is sent outside again as Edwards puts Tigre into a fireman’s carry and throws him into an X Factor of all things. Everyone is back up now with DJZ sunset flipping Tigre who Germans Eddie at the same time. DJZ hits a pair of running knees to Tigre’s back but Uno punches his way to freedom.
Edwards gets dropped into a neckbreaker from DJZ for another near fall but Eddie sends both guys to the floor for a moonsault off the apron. Tigre pops up for a springboard corkscrew plancha to take over again. Back in and Tigre gets crotched on the top and superplexed down, allowing DJZ to get two counts on both guys.
Tigre does the overly complicated spin around Eddie into a headscissors but Edwards counters his springboard hurricanrana into a half crab. DJZ breaks that up too and sends Eddie into the post, only to get kicked in the head. Eddie misses a top rope double stomps and gets DDT’ed for two before Tigre botches a springboard hurricanrana for two on DJZ. Uno gets shoved off the top and Eddie grabs the half crab on DJZ for the tap out.
Rating: C+. Match of the night so far, mainly due to it just being different. It’s still nothing we haven’t seen a dozen times or so before, but at least the right guy won and it was entertaining enough. Edwards comes off as the far better singles wrestler of the Wolves, but that could just be due to Richards coming off like a jerk most of the time.
A music video recaps the night so far.
Gauntlet Match
Winner gets a World Title shot and $50,000. It’s the Royal Rumble style with twelve entrants, two minute intervals and the final two having a singles match for the title. Edwards is in at #1 and Aries in at #2 with Eddie nursing a sore shoulder. Speaking of shoulders, a block from one is enough to put Eddie down and Aries goes for an early elimination. That goes about as well as you would expect this early on so Edwards starts busting out some chops. Neither guy can eliminate the other until it’s Kazarian in at #3.
All three fight each other and this is already going nowhere. Aries kicks Kaz in the head but Edwards tries to dump Austin instead of Kazarian. Edwards and Kazarian are on the mat and Robbie E. is in at #4. He walks around doing the money sign and they just pummel him with forearms and chops. They pair off again though with Robbie actually knocking Aries down for a breather.
Samuel Shaw is in at #5 and of course takes his sweet time to get to the ring. Robbie hides from him in the corner so Shaw reaches through the ropes to get to him. Kazarian puts Eddie in a sleeper but Aries puts a sleeper on Kazarian at the same time. Robbie does it to Aries and Shaw does it to Robbie for a five way sleeper. Tenay thinks this is original because just adding two more people to the same spot that’s been done in multi-man matches for twenty years is innovative.
Lashley comes in at #6 to clear out some bodies but everyone goes after him in a smart move. Aries’ brainbuster is easily blocked though and Lashley puts him out. Edwards quickly follows him with a big beal sending him to the floor and Kaz is the third elimination, all by Lashley. A spear is enough to dump Shaw, leaving Lashley vs. Robbie. The killing is postponed though as Abyss is in at #7.
The big guys slug it out and Lashley manages to suplex the masked one. A chokeslam stops Lashley cold but he comes back with a spear. Ethan Carter III is in at #8 as Lashley and Abyss get in a brawl near the ropes and are eliminated by Carter and E. in a big surprise. Robbie and Carter are apparently cool until Carter nails him in the face. They brawl on the mat for a bit as the fans have now died for an unprecedented 485th time tonight. Carter can’t throw him out and Gunner is in at #9.
Gunner goes right after Carter as Robbie hides in the corner again. Robbie gets up and saves Carter which he makes sure to point out to Ethan. Gunner can’t put either guy out but he can chop Carter’s chest into some pretty colors. We get the stupid “comedy” spot of Robbie landing between Carter’s legs. Carter is reeling until Jesse is in at #10. The BroMans double team Gunner as the announcers talk about the 80s. Ethan starts directing traffic until Gunner fights all of them off at once. James Storm is in at #11 but is fine with watching from the stage for awhile.
He finally comes down and says he wants Gunner for himself before choking him with the tag rope. Nothing happens for awhile as Bram is in at #12, giving us a final grouping of Jesse, Robbie, Carter, Storm, Gunner and Bram. Carter says he has an idea as the match just stops again. That goes nowhere as the BroMans dump Carter in just a few seconds. Jesse rams Gunner into the buckle so he can do that same I’M INTENSE spot again.
The BroMans accidentally collide and Gunner dumps Robbie with ease. Unfortunately he doesn’t freak out over not winning the money to pay his bills. Storm Last Calls Jesse to the floor and we’re down to three. A headbutt eliminates Bram and of course we’re down to the only rivalry in the match for the final two.
It’s a one on one match now so they stop for the big serious staredown. They slug it out with Storm clotheslining him down and dropping a leg for two. James goes outside for a beer but the bottle was used earlier. Instead he wedges a chair into the corner but of course goes face first into it, setting up the F5 to give Gunner the pin.
Rating: D. To the shock of no one and in keeping with the theme of the night, this was long and dull. The singles part lasted all of two minutes and ended with the same thing that almost every match in their feud ended with: Gunner winning without any real doubt. Unfortunately his push has died since this match was taped due to a six month feud with Samuel Shaw that has dragged Gunner through the floor.
Gunner promises to win the title before a long recap video ends the show.
Overall Rating: D. It’s not even that the shows are bad or anything as they usually have some watchable wrestling. I’d just like to see SOMETHING besides a tournament or gauntlet match to give me something fresh. I mean…can’t we just have a card of matches with a main event where some guys get to have some twenty minute matches that tear the house down? As usual these shows come and go and nothing sticks with me after about ten minutes. In other words, they’re very forgettable and that’s not the kind of show I’d drop money on.
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Today we’re looking at another big power guy in Luke Gallows.
After about a year as the Freakin Deacon in developmental, Gallows was brought up to be a Fake Kane that haunted the real one in a very complicated storyline that thankfully never went as far as it was going to (something about the unmasked Kane actually being the impostor and the real one having been locked away for years). Here’s their showdown at Vengeance 2006.
Kane vs. Kane
This is one of the most infamously stupid angles ever. Kane is facing a guy that looks like he used to. Basically Kane was in a bad movie called See No Evil and somehow it brought a guy from his past to WWE who dressed like he used to or something. Kane knew who he was but they never told us that or anything so whatever. He was played by the guy now known as Luke Gallows. I’ll refer to them as real and fake here.
Real dominates early which doesn’t last very long. Real goes for the mask and doesn’t get it of course. Only HHH could manage to do that. And there are the boring chants. Ah look a chinlock. Ross says Kane is at a disadvantage because he doesn’t know who he’s wrestling despite saying Kane knew the imposter earlier.
Ross says it’s been an ugly match. Yeah I’d agree. Is this supposed to be good or to make sense? Real hits something like a throw off the top but it was more or less closer to an over the shoulder slam than anything else. Just end this please. Fake hits a chokeslam and does Kane’s old pin to end it.
Rating: F+. Oh do I even need to explain this? The match was worse than the angle. Kane would beat the imposter up on Raw soon and take the mask, ending anything of this angle. Yeah it’s bad and there’s a reason this is one of the many things in Kane’s career that you just never hear about again.
That was it for him on the main roster for awhile so it was back to developmental for some uninspiring characters. He would finally be brought up to the main roster as Festus, who was basically a vegetable until the bell rang when he went psycho. Here’s one of his first matches with his partner Jesse on Smackdown, October 12, 2007.
Jesse/Festus vs. Conrad Carnes/Jay Adams
Jesse explains the concept for us in case we’re not smart enough to get it. Jesse and Adams get things going with Adams throwing him out to the floor. Back in and Jesse armdrags Adams down as Deuce and Domino are shown watching in the back. Conrad comes in but it’s off to Festus for some hard slaps upside the head. A big legdrop crushes Conrad and Festus throws him into Adams. Jesse comes back in for two off a sunset flip but Jay clotheslines his head off to take over. Everything breaks down and Festus throws Jesse into a shoulder block for the pin on Adams.
Rating: D. It’s really not hard to see why this team never went anywhere. Jesse is really generic in the ring and Festus is only there to wreck things. Maybe with a better partner and less of a country boy persona they could have gone somewhere, but Jesse really held these guys back.
Festus became a fairly dominant force until he had this match on Smackdown, April 11, 2008.
Festus vs. Undertaker
Undertaker is World Champion but this is of course non-title. Festus goes all nuts to start so Undertaker just kicks him in the face. Undertaker drives in some shoulders and hits an early Old School. A powerslam plants Undertaker and he drives some headbutts into Undertaker’s ribs. The Dead Man gets right back up but misses an elbow drop. Festus clotheslines him out to the floor and they fight on the outside with both guys being rammed into the barricade.
Undertaker is staggered on the floor but manages to whip Festus into the steps to take over. The apron legdrop has Festus in even more trouble. Back in and Undertaker nails the running DDT but hurts himself trying a headbutt. A big clothesline drops Festus again and there’s the chokeslam but Festus is right next to the ropes.
After a quick breather on the floor, Festus hammers away on Undertaker back inside but the referee gets bumped. A bicycle kick knocks Undertaker senseless but Festus walks away, allowing the Dead Man to sit up. Hell’s Gate goes on but there’s no referee. Festus is done and another referee comes out to call for the bell. Was there really a need for that ref bump?
Rating: C. That’s a good example of how you give someone a rub. Undertaker was never in serious trouble and he won completely clean, but Festus made him work for it. That match made Festus look like more of a threat than any squash he could win and Undertaker doesn’t lose anything because of it. Again, it’s how you give a rub.
One more Jesse and Festus match at the 2008 Great American Bash.
Smackdown Tag Titles: John Morrison/The Miz vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Jesse/Festus vs Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder
Miz and Morrison are defending. Festus is Luke Gallows who freaks out at the sound of a bell. Jesse and Festus clear the ring so the champs send Horny in to fight him. Smart move guys. Horny wants to try it but instead dives through the ropes to take out the champ. Festus vs. Miz gets us going officially. Off to Jesse with the only world champion to be found in this match in trouble.
Morrison and Finlay come in and the Irishman is in trouble. Foley asks why you would tag into someone on another team since this is one fall to a finish. Miz and Morrison use various nefarious techniques to hurt Finley and it’s off to the chinlock. Miz and Morrison switch in and out twice and Finlay gets in a shot. I don’t think Hawkins and Ryder have been in yet and as I say that Ryder comes in to steal a pin attempt, getting two.
The former Edgeheads/Major Brothers hammer away on Finlay but he counters into the rolling fireman’s carry slam, whatever that was called. The Irish Club is brought in and I don’t know who got hit as Miz and Morrison ran in to break it up. Finlay gets in a shot on I think Hawkins and it’s off to Horny. Jesse tags himself in to beat on Hawkins. There’s the not hot tag to Festus and he cleans house. He and Jesse load up a rocket launcher but Ryder pulls Festus to the floor and Jesse gets slammed off the top. Hawkins pins Jesse for the surprise title win.
Rating: C-. Hey, you ever seen one of those multi team tag matches where not a lot really happens because there are so many teams that nothing can get going at all and no one is able to get anything going and the ending is a big mess with a team that didn’t do much stealing the win and it wasn’t bad but you’ve seen something just like it before? Well this was one of those matches.
The rest of 2008 saw Jesse and Festus as moving men who wrapped people in bubble wrap. It wasn’t much of a surprise when he went down to developmental again before coming back in 2010, having been cured of his issues by CM Punk. Now under the name Luke Gallows, it was revealed that Festus’ problems were due to being heavily medicated. Punk turned him straightedge and made him into a monster. From Smackdown on July 31, 2010.
Big Show vs. Luke Gallows
Gallows has a bit of red in his singlet now which is a nice little twist on the boring stuff he usually does. In a cool bit Show gets Chimmel to come up and put the mid next to the chest of Gallows when he chops it. The sound didn’t work but the idea was there at least. Gallows gets knocked to the floor and the beatdown is on as the SES jumps him for the DQ. They hurt his hand and Punk takes the sling off so he’s fine I guess? Mercury is choking him and his eyes are great. No rating since the “match” was a few kicks and chops.
And again at Summerslam 2010.
Big Show vs. Straight Edge Society
Three on one handicap match. Punk has already grown his hair to a bit shorter than it is in 2013. We continue the awesome that is CM Punk as he wears a shirt saying “I Broke Big Show’s Hand”, which is a reference to Greg Valentine’s “I Broke Wahoo’s Leg” shirt from about thirty years ago. Show takes off his cast to reveal that the hand is fully healed and to freak Punk out a bit.
Mercury charges right into a chop and Gallows gets the same. The Society has to tag in and out here so Punk calls a conference on the apron. Gallows and Mercury jump Big Show and apparently tagging isn’t required here. Show easily throws away the lackeys and palms Mercury by the head, throwing him over the top and onto Gallows. Punk is the only one left now and a few shots to the back easily put him down. Show misses a chop and hits the steps, giving the Society an opening to go after the hand.
The Society pounds away with really basic stuff as we’re just waiting on the comeback. Punk charges into a back elbow and Show cleans house for a bit until Punk hits a high kick to slow him down. Some running knees in the corner stagger the giant before a double DDT from Punk and Mercury gets two. Punk goes nuts on the hand but Show picks him up on his shoulders. After dropping Punk over the top, the lackeys are destroyed again and Show chokeslams Mercury onto Gallows for a double pin.
Rating: D. Another dull match here as Big Show never once felt like he was in any kind of danger at all. That was the problem with this whole feud: Show treated Punk like an annoyance rather than an opponent. This would lead up to the destruction of Punk in a one on one match next month because Big Show needed that push right?
Amazingly enough there wasn’t much else for Gallows to do after he was destroyed this badly so WWE released him in November of the same year. Let’s hit the indy scene for a bit at JCW Bloodymania V.
X-Pac vs. Luke Gallows vs. Rob Conway
The winner gets a contract, even though Conway already has one. Fast paced opening here with no one being able to get an advantage. Conway is sent to the floor and Gallows is knocked out as well, followed by Pac with a big dive. Conway crotches Pac on the platform the ring is on which gets two back in the ring. Now we get to the usual turning point of a triple threat: the fight between the heels (?) that want to pin the guy who is down.
Gallows kills Conway with a chokeslam but Pac kicks Gallows down. Luke kicks Pac in the face in the corner but misses a middle rope elbow. Conway puts a sleeper on Gallows but they both fall to the floor. The sleeper wasn’t broken though and Gallows is put to sleep. Conway goes back in to try to do the same to Pac but X-Pac rolls him up for the pin.
Rating: D+. This wasn’t terrible but it just came and went. Gallows is as generic of a big man as you can get and Conway is just there, which is why he’s an OVW legend and not much else. The match was as typical of a three way as you could ever ask for. Nothing special at all here though, which might as well be the name of the show.
Gallows would become part of the Aces and 8’s in TNA, wrestling as one of the masked men at Bound For Glory 2012.
Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Bully Ray
No DQ and Ray has Sting face paint on. The Aces still have Park with them and he’s now conscious. Keep in mind that Park had figured out who the Aces’ leader was, or at least a lot about them, at this point. That’s also going to be a big plot point later on. It’s a huge brawl to start on the floor with the very big Aces quickly getting beaten down. The Bikers fights back with right hands as the fans are chanting for Hogan.
Ray and Sting double team we’ll say #1 with an elbow to the head and a piece of a table to the same spot. #1 comes back by whipping Ray into the steps and avoids a Stinger Splash against the barricade. They finally get inside with #2 working over Sting with uppercuts and a slam for two. Off to #1 with a clothesline for two as we see Park handcuffed to the barricade.
The bikers start double teaming but Sting no sells a slam and Hulks Up but the Scorpion on #1 is quickly broken up. A Death Drop out of nowhere plants #1 but Sting tags Ray instead of covering. Ray cleans house with elbows and a middle rope shoulder but #1 gets in a knee to the back from the apron. Ray comes right back with a double clothesline to drop the Aces and a splash gets two on #1.
Sting and #2 get in a fight on the floor and #1 brings in a chair. Bully kicks it out of his hands but a third member comes in with a low blow. He spits at Park so Joseph rips the handcuffs off the barricade and hammers away on the third guy. All four of the regular guys are in the ring now and we get a Doomsday Device on #1. There’s a Stinger Splash to #2 and Sting wants the tables. #1 pulls Sting to the floor for a brawl and a fourth Ace comes in for a spinebuster to put Ray through the table, giving #2 the pin.
Rating: C. There was only so much you could do with something like this the bikers were just faceless monsters so the match shouldn’t have been any kind of a wrestling clinic. That being said, Sting can only do so much in the ring so keeping it as a brawl was a good idea. On top of that, this was all about the story instead of the wrestling so they could do almost whatever they wanted out there.
Gallows was soon unmasked and named Doc. Here he is at Turning Point 2012.
Doc vs. Joseph Park
Doc is Luke Gallows remember. Park is always amazing in this role given how inept he can make himself look. He tries single leg takedown but Doc just laughs at him. Some wild right hands miss Doc until one accidentally catches him, ticking the biker off. They head to the floor where Park does a lot of running but manages to send Doc into the steps. Back in and Doc loads up a studded belt around his fist but the referee takes it away. Then we stop, because it’s hammer time. That of course gets taken away and Park pounds away.
The next three minutes or so are just Doc beating on Park with basic stuff and there’s only so much you can say about punches. Park starts a comeback but gets hit in the head with the belt to bust him open. He goes into a rage and hits the Black Hole Slam before turning back into Park. Park grabs a chair to whack Doc in the back with for two, but that’s all he’s got as Doc chokeslams him down for the pin at 11:01.
Rating: D. This was WAY too long and that’s where it died. At the end of the day, the joke with Park has been going on for months now and the fans clearly get it. Once the fans get what’s going on, the joke stops being as funny, which means it’s probably time to pull the plug on it, or at least move things forward. The match was bad though as it should have been about five minutes shorter.
Here’s a big match for him at Genesis 2013.
Sting vs. Doc
Sting fights off an attack in the aisle and beats Doc into the crowd before the bell as is his custom. We finally get back to the ring for the bell with Sting taking over. Immediately it heads to the outside with Doc kicking Sting in the ribs and sending him into the steps. Doc poses so Sting kicks him in the ribs as we head back inside. A big right hand drops Sting and it’s chinlock time.
Sting quickly fights up but gets splashed for two. They head to the ropes and Doc gets caught in them, allowing a Scorpion Death Drop to get two. The reaction to the kickout is a bit less than optimal I’d assume. Doc misses a charge into the corner and it’s Stinger Splash and Death Drop for the pin at 5:52.
Rating: D+. Sting’s matches on PPV tend to be far closer to brawls than matches but when you’re a legend like he is, you can get away with that I guess. Aces and 8’s continue to look like jokes but we’re WAY past the point of that surprising anyone anymore. This was about exactly what I was expecting to see, which is to say not much.
Doc was part of the big Aces and 8’s team at Lockdown 2013.
Lethal Lockdown
TNA: Sting, Magnus, Samoa Joe, Eric Young, James Storm
Aces and 8’s: Mr. Anderson, D-Von, Doc, Mike Knux, Garrett Bischoff
This has some interesting rules. Two men (Anderson and Magnus) start things off and fight for three minutes. After those three minutes, Aces and 8’s (they won a series of matches on Thursday) get a man advantage for two minutes. Then TNA sends in its second man to even it up for two minutes. Aces and 8’s then get another advantage for two more minutes. They alternate until everyone is in and then it’s one fall to a finish.
Magnus pounds Anderson down in the corner to start before hitting a clothesline. Anderson sends him into the cage though to take over as we have less than a minute before someone else comes in. Off to a chinlock by Anderson to kill the time until Knux makes it 2-1. Also remember that the match can’t end until all ten men are in the match. A sidewalk slam and legdrop floor Magnus as this is one sided so far.
Samoa Joe is in to tie things up and TNA takes over for a bit. The former tag champions continue to work well together by taking the bikers apart. Anderson and Knux are beaten down until Garrett Bischoff comes in to make it 3-2. The fans tell Garrett that he can’t wrestle as Magnus and Joe beat him up as well. Anderson and Knux finally get up and save their partner as Eric Young is in to make it 3-3. Oh wait he has to strip first.
As is the case with every other period, the team with the latest man in takes over. D-Von is in to make it 4-3 Aces and 8’s and the numbers game takes over for the bikers again. Joe fights back with some palm shots to Anderson in the corner but D-Von knocks him down again to take over. The fans want Sting but they get James Storm instead. Storm cleans house with Closing Times and Last Calls but they don’t mean much at this point.
House continues to be cleaned until Doc is in to round out Aces and 8’s. Doc takes over for Team TNA with his power stuff and the match slows down a lot. Here’s Sting with two garbage cans full of weapons to finalize things, meaning it’s now one fall to a finish. Team TNA takes over with a bunch of weapon shots as I guess there’s no roof this year for a change. It’s all Team TNA at this point as the match slows down a bit. Garrett Bischoff gets worn out by Joe via a trashcan.
Sting holds Anderson for Young but Young almost hits Sting by mistake. The break lets the bikers take over with Doc chokeslamming Young. Magnus and Storm come back to take over, sending Garrett running to the top of the cage. They chase after him, resulting in I think Doc and Knux making the save. Joe powerbombs ALL FIVE GUYS down in a big Tower of Doom before putting Anderson in an STF but Doc makes the save. TNA takes over again with Sting hitting the Death Drop on Knox, but he doesn’t cover. Instead he sends Young to the top of the cage for an elbow drop for the pin at 26:27.
Rating: B. The problem of the ring being too small to hold ten guys still exists, but as someone with a bad fear of heights I’m very glad to see them not have the roof on the cage. It’s a risk they just don’t need to take and the Tower of Doom spot was more than able to make up for it. Very solid match here but Aces and 8’s continue to fall further into the abyss.
Later in the year, Doc would head over to New Japan and join the Bullet Club as Doc Gallows. Here he is in the 2014 G1 Climax Tournament against Tomoaki Honma on July 25, 2014.
G1 Climax Tournament: Tomoaki Honma vs. Doc Gallows
Honma looks a bit like a more muscular Eric Young. Gallows shoves him down to start and drops him with a shoulder. Honma avoids an elbow but misses a headbutt and gets tossed out to the floor. A hard whip sends him into the barricade and it’s all Doc so far. Back in and Doc charges into an elbow but calmly kicks Honma off the top for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit before they screw up a sunset flip. Honma hits a basement dropkick to take Doc’s head off but Gallows quickly gets up and no sells chops.
The big guy actually gets slammed and a falling headbutt gets two. A big delayed suplex drops Honma and Gallows crushes him with a jumping back elbow to the jaw. Doc plants him with a pumphandle slam for two but Honma gets right back up. He clotheslines Doc down but misses a top rope falling headbutt. Gallows nails a reverse full nelson slam for two more before a sitout chokebomb is enough to pin Honma.
Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad as they stuck with a basic big man vs. small man formula. Gallows is a good choice for a power monster and the face paint he had on here made him look just like one. Honma didn’t do much for me and some quick research says he lost all ten of his matches in the tournament. That’s not very surprising.
Gallows is a guy that feels like he’s been around forever but he has a LOT of time left as he’ll be 31 by the end of 2014. He’s a big power guy who looks intimidating but can have a good enough match to get by. I wouldn’t be surprised if he got another shot in WWE as he seems to be having a very solid run in New Japan. His age really surprised me though and that says a lot about him.
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Bound For Glory 2013 (2014 Redo): It’s Sad In A Way
Bound For Glory 2013 Date: October 20, 2013
Location: Viejas Arena, San Diego, California
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
We’ll wrap up the redos here with a show that really doesn’t feel like the biggest deal of the year. The main event is AJ Styles, who has spent most of the year channeling 1997 Sting as the loner who barely talks, challenging Aces and 8’s President Bully Ray. This doesn’t feel like as big a deal as it should due to Ray only having won the title back about two months ago following a meaningless reign by Chris Sabin. Let’s get to it.
There was a pre-show match in 2013.
Pre-Show: Gauntlet Match
This is a four team gauntlet match with the winners getting a Tag Team Title shot on the regular pay per view. We start with Bad Influence vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez. Guerrero and Kaz get things going but it’s quickly off to Hernandez who hits the over the shoulder backbreaker to both guys at the same time. SuperMex heads to the ramp and gets a running start to take out Bad Influence with a huge running double clothesline.
We take a break and come back with Hernandez hitting a kind of powerbomb on Kaz for no cover. Both guys crawl over to make tags so Chavo can speed things up with shoulders to Daniels. Everything quickly breaks down and Hernandez is back up to clean house with clotheslines. Chavo hits Three Amigos on Daniels because he’s an Eddie Guerrero tribute wrestler. Speaking of Eddie, Chavo goes up for the Frog Splash but Kaz shoves him off the top to give Daniels a rollup pin.
Joseph Park and Eric Young are the third team and drop Kaz with a double back elbow. Park’s big splash gets no cover but he does slam Kaz down again. Park tries another slam but gets dropped on his head to change control. Bad Influence changes without a tag because they’re, well, bad, allowing Daniels to send Park face first into Kaz’s boot. A slingshot elbow followed by a slingshot legdrop gets two as Young teases interfering.
Kaz’s sunset flip is countered but Park only hits mat when trying to sit down. We take another break and come back with Eric getting the hot tag and cleaning house with elbows and right hands. A belly to belly gets two on Daniels but he comes back with a release Rock Bottom. He misses the BME though and Park’s Samoan drop gives Young the pin.
Before the fourth team comes out though, Kaz lays out Young with Fade to Black and send Park into the Ultimate X structure. The BroMans are the final team (due to winning a match on Impact and come out with Mr. Olympia Phil Heath. Park is carried to the back and we’re starting with a handicap match. Robbie starts for the team but it’s quickly off to Jesse for a shot to the ribs. Young comes back with a double clothesline and some right hands to both Bros. The top rope elbow gets two as Jesse makes a save and the yet to be named BroDown (Hart Attack) gives the BroMans the title shot.
Rating: C. This match got a good deal of time, running about twenty two minutes. That’s far more than you usually get in a gauntlet match and it’s really nice for a change. I always have trouble with gauntlets as most of the falls take no time, which makes me wonder why that never happens in regular matches. This was a free match so it’s hard to complain when compared to the rest of the card.
The opening video is almost all about AJ with his voiceovers talking about how tired he is of doing the right thing all the time. Now he’s back to fight for himself instead of TNA, even though it makes him the same guy he used to be when he got ticked off. One other note: Dixie Carter is now evil and has sided with Bully Ray, who is still trying to take over her company. It was around this time that people were sick of hearing from her, so of course she became a bigger and bigger focal point of TV.
Taz is now part of Aces and 8’s so we have a heel commentator.
X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. Manik vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries
Ultimate X with Manik defending against an all-star lineup. Joe is part of the reformed Main Event Mafia which is around to fight Aces and 8’s. Sabin quickly goes to the corner but gets glared down by everyone else in the match. Instead he bails to the floor and pulls Aries outside with him, only to be rammed into the tress. Back inside and Manik is put in the Tree of Woe so Sabin can stand on his crotch.
Tenay says this is the 32nd time Ultimate X has been held, which is pretty frequent considering the company isn’t even twelve years old at this point. Joe snapmares Chris down for a loud chop to the back, making Sabin’s girlfriend Velvet Sky scream. Manik takes Joe down with a springboard dropkick as Hardy and Aries start going up the tress. Jeff pulls Austin down before Manik hurricanranas Hardy and Sabin down.
Aries is left alone in the ring and goes up, only to have Hardy pull him right back down before hitting the reverse powerbomb from last year. Since it’s a Jeff Hardy match, it’s ladder time until Joe hits a suicide elbow to take Jeff out. Sabin baseball slides the ladder into Joe but Manik dropkicks Joe down. Aries dives onto Joe and Manik but Manik gets back up and hurricanranas Sabin out to the floor.
Joe hammers away on Aries in the corner but the MuscleBuster is countered. Hardy comes back in but eats the running dropkick, followed by Joe getting the same. The brainbuster is countered into a swinging Koquina Clutch to send Aries outside. The champ goes up but gets pulled down into a low blow. Joe hits a running backsplash on Manik before getting dropkicked out to the floor by Sabin.
The Whisper in the Wind drops Sabin and now the ladder is brought in. Manik and Aries climb the ladder and fight over the belt but Sabin knocks it over. He goes after Hardy instead of climbing, earning himself a Twist of Fate. Sabin tells Velvet Sky to stop Hardy from climbing and throws her in the ring against her will. The distraction of Velvet in that tight of a dress lets Sabin run up the ladder to win the title.
Rating: C+. This was a good idea to freshen up the match but at the same time they’ve killed the concept. Why in the world would someone use the hard method of crawling along the ropes now instead of just climbing a ladder? It’s a nice followup to Sabin’s World Title run and heel turn, but it’s not like the title means anything outside of Destination X season.
It’s time for our theme of the night: great AJ Styles moments, starting with Styles becoming the first X-Division Champion back in 2002.
Here’s Bad Influence to fill some time since this is a seven match card. Kaz says no men have been screwed more than them since Brokeback Mountain. It’s an embarrassment that they’re not on the card tonight since Bad Influence IS TNA. They beat Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez and then had to face a lawyer and a fisherman so that shouldn’t even count. TNA loves to mess with things so let’s make it a three way for the Tag Team Titles.
This brings out Eric Young who says he’s here on scientific business. Earlier tonight, Bad Influence created a monster and everyone knows they should run. They beat him down but here’s Abyss to save his partner and clean house. Both Bad Influences take Black Hole Slams and Abyss helps Young up.
Gunner and James Storm tell the BroMans to not worry about their hair and girls because the champions are ready for them. JB’s hair looks funny for some reason.
Tag Team Titles: BroMans vs. James Storm/Gunner
Storm had a spot in a four way Tag Team Title match at Slammiversary and Gunner impressed him enough to get on the team. They won the belts and haven’t had much competition since. Mr. Olympia Phil Heath is with the challengers again. It’s a brawl to start with the champions cleaning house and Storm being backdropped over the top onto the BroMans. Back in and Storm throws Jesse across the ring before bringing in Gunner for some right hands to the head.
Gunner takes Jesse into the corner for some chops but a Robbie distraction lets Jesse pull him off the middle rope to take over. Robbie comes in legally and hammers away before giving it back to Jesse for two. E. quickly comes back in for a chinlock before Jesse breaks up a backslide attempt with a dropkick. The Bros break up a hot tag attempt and Jesse poses a lot. He gets crotched on the top though, allowing Gunner to hit a fall away slam to take Jesse down.
There’s the hot tag to Storm and house is cleaned again. James gets two off a top rope elbow and is sporting a big cut on his leg. Everything breaks down and Robbie escapes the Eye of the Storm before nailing an implant DDT for two. Gunner plants Robbie with an Irish Curse but Jesse breaks up the Gun Rack. A powerbomb/Backstabber combo gets a VERY close two on Robbie. The Last Call plants Jesse but Robbie throws in a title belt for a distraction, setting up the BroDown for the pin and the titles.
Rating: C-. I remember this being a bit better but the match wasn’t that bad. The near fall was really good and having new champions was a big surprise, but it was still missing something. I have no idea why Heath was out there as he didn’t add a thing to this match. Not bad but the new champs wouldn’t have anyone to feud with for awhile.
Video on Angle’s Hall of Fame induction.
Sting comes out to officially induct Angle into the Hall of Fame. Kurt comes out and thanks the fans but says he can’t accept this induction. This wound up being a story and Angle would eventually accept, which makes the Hall of Fame seem like a prop for angles rather than something special. It’s not a horrible thing but I still don’t like this. My guess however is it had something to do with Angle’s DUI in early August.
Clip of AJ wining the World title at No Surrender 2009.
Dixie Carter puts all of AJ’s merchandise on sale. Her nephew Ethan comes up and we get the new catchphrase: “The world needs us. We’re the Carters.” Well he’s easy to hate.
Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Brooke vs. ODB
ODB is defending and Aces and 8’s member Brooke is Miss Tessmacher. Brooke is quickly run over and Gail gets sent to the floor by the champion. Back up and Brooke stomps away in the corner before giving ODB a Stinkface. That’s fine with ODB who pops up and chest bumps Brooke into the corner for a Bronco Buster. Gail gets back in and is quickly knocked right back to the floor. Brooke faceplants ODB for two as Gail is holding her arm.
ODB powers up to break a reverse chinlock but gets dropped by a running forearm. A spinning neckbreaker puts the champion down for two but Gail pulls Brooke down for a Figure Four around the post. ODB takes Gail down but Brooke gets two off a rollup. Off to a half crab on Brooke and Gail has to run in to break up a tap out. Both challengers go to the top so ODB tries to superplex them both, only to be shoved down. Gail missile dropkicks ODB and Brooke drops a top rope elbow on Kim to put all three on the mat.
ODB is up first to run everyone over but the referee gets crushed in the corner. Another shot knocks him out to the floor and we get the double fireman’s carry to show off ODB’s strength. Brooke falls off so ODB gives Gail the Bam onto Brooke’s body. Cue Lei’D Tapa to fight with ODB and knock the champion to the floor. A powerbomb plants Brooke and Tapa puts Gail on top for the pin and the title.
Rating: D+. Giving Gail a new monster bodyguard doesn’t make her any more interesting. Tapa had a different kind of look but at the end of the day, she was nothing compared to Ivelisse from Gut Check. The match was nothing we haven’t seen on Impact a bunch of times and just restarts the circle of Knockouts with the title all over again.
New broadcaster Gil Corsey (he didn’t last) is with the BroMans and Mr. Olympia. Protein shakes are poured and that’s about it.
Bobby Roode says he’ll prove he’s a better man than Kurt.
We recap Roode vs. Angle. Roode didn’t like Angle going into the Hall of Fame so he and Bad Influence (the Extraordinary Gentlemen’s Organization) inducted Bobby into the EGO Hall of Fame.
Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode
This is Angle’s first match back from rehab. Feeling out process to start with Roode actually taking him down to the mat. Kurt is a bit more hesitant to go after Roode this time but gets caught in a headlock anyway. A quick Crossface attempt sends Angle running but his ankle lock does the same to Roode. Back in and Roode hammers away in the corner until Kurt suplexes him out to the floor.
The fight heads out to the floor where another suplex drops Bobby. Angle tries one too many times though and gets his neck snapped across the top rope. Back in and Roode stomps away before getting two off a suplex. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Angle fights up with right hands. The Rolling Germans have Roode in trouble but he gets a shoulder up at two. The Angle Slam is countered with an armdrag and Roode gets two off a spinebuster.
Kurt escapes a Roode Bomb and puts on the ankle lock as we’re into the trading finishers section. The counter sends Angle arm first into the post and a DDT on the arm sets up the Crossface from Roode. A foot on the rope breaks the hold and Roode is getting frustrated. He walks into another suplex but avoids the moonsault. Roode slaps on the Crossface again but Kurt grabs the ankle lock to break the hold. I love that counter. Bobby pulls him down and puts on the Crossface again until Angle rolls over for two.
That gets rolled over for two more and Angle’s clothesline is countered into yet another Crossface. Kurt reverses THAT into another Angle Slam for two but he can’t follow it up. They slug it out from their knees and Kurt starts rolling more Germans. Bobby can’t take more of those though so he grabs the referee, allowing a low blow to Angle. The yet to be named Roode Bomb gets a very close two. He loads up another one but Kurt rolls down into the ankle lock.
Angle gets the grapevine for good measure and Roode starts to black out, but he’s being crafty. Channeling his inner Bret Hart, Roode is goldbricking and uses the referee checking his arm to grab the rope. Kurt is frustrated but takes Roode to the top for a Super Angle Slam. Both guys are down but Roode gets to his feet long enough to fall on Angle for a surprise pin. Angle never moved after hitting the Slam.
Rating: A-. This was the great match of the show with both guys showing off some awesome stuff. I like that they went with the Austin vs. HHH finish from No Way Out where they hit each other but HHH fell on top for a pin. It’s also the right call as Angle didn’t need the win and Roode gets the (unmentioned) win back from Bound For Glory 2011.
Angle is taken out on medics but wakes up when they try to put a neck brace on him, allowing him to walk out on his own.
AJ beat Sting at Bound For Glory 2009.
Styles is getting ready.
Bully Ray is in the back with a bunch of people we can’t see. A lot of the Aces and 8’s had left at this point so it’s implied they’re back tonight. Ray says the team is reborn tonight and says it’s all about the colors. We never saw who he was talking to.
Ethan Carter III vs. Norv Fernum
Fernum is a jobber who might weigh 150lbs and both guys are debuting tonight. Carter throws him around to start as you would expect before dropping him with a forearm. A high collar t-bone suplex makes Taz smile and Ethan rubs his face in the mat. Fernum scores with some dropkicks and a high cross body for two. Not that it matters as the yet to be named 1%er gives Ethan the easy pin.
Rating: C. Of course it’s not much of a match but this was exactly what you want from a debut for a guy like Carter. He’s become such an awesome heel and this was the kind of start they should have gone with. They played up the idea of Carter getting a handpicked opponent, which is something a rich guy would get. Smart and effective debut.
Magnus says he’s going to get his big win tonight and become the star he’s destined to be, even if it’s at Sting’s expense.
We recap Magnus vs. Sting. Magnus was in the finals of the Bound For Glory Series and lost, destroying his confidence. Sting said Magnus, his Main Event Mafia brother, was going to be a star and Sting was going to give him the chance to do just that.
Magnus vs. Sting
Both guys are good here and this is about making Magnus a star instead of a rivalry. They trade headlocks to start until Sting clotheslines Magnus down. A shoulder puts him on the floor and we’re in a slow start. Sting holds the ropes to let Magnus back in before getting knocked out to the apron with a European uppercut. The Brit holds the ropes open for Sting before leveling him with a clothesline to take over.
Off to a bodyscissors from Magnus for awhile until Sting finally grabs the ropes. Some ax handles have Sting in more trouble and Magnus stays on the ribs and back. Sting comes right back with a backdrop and the Stinger Splash followed by the Deathlock with very little torque on it. Magnus powers out of it and a double clothesline puts both guys down.
Back up and Magnus starts no selling shots to the face ala Sting vs. Flair back in 1987 before hitting a Stinger Splash of his own. A Michinoku Driver gets two but Sting shrugs off a Cloverleaf attempt. Now Sting starts no selling and hits his own Stinger Splash and another Deathlock with so little torque that the fans are barely interested. I guess Sting’s knees just won’t let him sit down anymore.
Magnus finally makes the rope and stops another Splash with a European uppercut. The Scorpion Death Drop puts Sting down and the top rope elbow gets two. A second elbow misses but Magnus fights out of some Death Drop attempts with HARD elbows to the face. Sting says Magnus to come on so Magnus takes him down and puts on the Cloverleaf for the very surprising submission.
Rating: D+. The fans are really not pleased with the ending and I can’t say I blame them. One of the biggest problems with Sting’s later TNA stuff is how fast his matches end. There’s no buildup to them and they just stop out of nowhere. This wasn’t a very good match either but that’s the case with almost all passing the torch matches. Without any hatred between them, there’s no reason for them to be fighting and it makes for a dull match.
They shake hands post match but Magnus doesn’t seem too interested.
AJ beat Magnus to get the title shot tonight.
Bully quotes Welcome to the Jungle to tell AJ that he’s going to die tonight. He doesn’t want AJ to die though. Ray wants AJ to have to live with himself and go back to Gainesville, Georgia and go into that trailer park so he can look at his kids and tell them he’s a failure. That will kill AJ and tonight, he’s in Bully’s jungle.
We recap AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray, which is almost all about AJ vs. Dixie. AJ won the title shot in the BFG Series but the main story is about Dixie Carter not wanting a hick like AJ as the world champion. She’s promised tonight is his last night in the company and has made the main event basically a street fight.
TNA World Title: AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray
Bully is defending and has the gorgeous Brooke with him. Ray powers him into the corner to start and says he can see the fear in AJ’s eyes. Styles tells him to bring it and gets taken down by the wrist. He finally rolls out but takes AJ down with a big boot to the face. Bully knocks him down again and tells AJ he’ll take care of the wife and kids. That just ticks AJ off and the drop down into a dropkick puts Ray down.
AJ’s Calf Killer goes on out of nowhere but Aces and 8’s member Garrett Bischoff comes out for a distraction. Ray picks up a hammer but AJ kicks it out of his hands and swings it himself. Bully prevents a bad case of death by chopping Styles a few times to Taz’s delight. He mocks Hogan with the hand to the ear before chopping AJ again. AJ asks him for another and Ray backs up into the corner out of fear. Styles goes off on him in the corner but gets nailed by a clothesline.
Ray’s next chop leaves a handprint on AJ’s chest but he comes back with kicks to the leg. Cue Aces and 8’s member Knux for a chokeslam on Styles, giving Bully two. Ray is ticked off at the near fall so he pokes Hebner in the chest, only to get shouted down. A big running clothesline hits Knux by mistake and AJ grabs a rollup for two. Ray kicks AJ right in the face to knock him out to the floor as this is picking up again.
They head outside and Ray picks up the hammer but gets Peled onto the announcers’ table. Styles loads up the springboard 450 but Ray moves, sending AJ crashing through the table for a huge wreck. Taz hands Ray a boxcutter so the champ can start cutting up the ring. He peels back the mat and then the padding underneath, leaving only the wooden boards.
With AJ still down, Ray calls the boys to the ring. Instead he gets Dixie because where would we be without her? She hands Ray a chair but AJ comes in with the springboard forearm to drive the chair into Bully’s face. The springboard 450 connects but Dixie tells Hebner not to count the pin. The hesitation lets Ray kick out at what should have been about 15. AJ’s Clash is countered with a backdrop onto the wood and Ray actually hits the middle rope backsplash. It’s only good for two though so Ray nails him in the back with a chair. AJ escapes the piledriver and nails a Pele, followed by Spiral Tap for the pin and the title.
Rating: B-. The match was good but it felt like a long segment at times instead of a match. The missed splash looked great and ripping up the ring was interesting, but man alive does Dixie Carter drag down segments she’s in. It’s not due to being a bad character as she’s easy to hate. It’s that I just do not want to see her involved because she’s going to get way more focus than she deserves and make things a lot more annoying than interesting.
As for AJ’s character, it’s questionable at best. We spent months on him as the loner who didn’t want anything to do with TNA and teased being a part of Aces and 8’s, but now he’s TNA’s conquering hero? That’s a stretch to say the least and the match felt more about Dixie vs. AJ by the end. They could save that for later on TV, which they would do again because TNA does some questionable things.
A bunch of recaps and a celebration end the show.
Overall Rating: C+. This show tried and had its moments but there’s not enough here to make the show great. That being said, not having to sit through the bad TV shows setting up this show made things a lot easier. It’s just the wrestling and the main event and Roode vs. Angle matches make it worth sitting through. Not a great show or anything and the booking continues to be AWFUL but the wrestling isn’t bad.
Ratings Comparison
Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez vs. BroMans vs. Eric Young/Joseph Park vs. Bad Influence
Original: C
Redo: C-
Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries vs. Samoa Joe vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Manik
Original: C+
Redo: C+
Gunner/James Storm vs. BroMans
Original: C
Redo: C-
Brooke vs. ODB vs. Gail Kim
Original: D+
Redo: D+
Bobby Roode vs. Kurt Angle
Original: B+
Redo: A-
Ethan Carter III vs. Norv Fernum
Original: D-
Redo: C
Sting vs. Magnus
Original: C
Redo: D+
AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray
Original: C
Redo: B-
Overall Rating
Original: D+
Redo: C+
As usual, the lack of sitting through the build is a good thing. When TNA cuts out the nonsense of TV, they’re much easier to sit through.
So that’s Bound For Glory so far. Overall, the show is very endemic of TNA in general: they have good stuff, but the lack of creating top stars kills them. Four of the first five shows are more about Sting than anything else and the latter ones are mainly about Angle or Hogan. I get the idea of making them look strong so putting someone over them means something, but that only happened once at the biggest show of the year. Other than that, it’s almost all about making the old guys look good and that’s missing the point.
The show is worth checking out most of the time, but you can see TNA going downhill after about 2007. There’s almost always value to the show and none of them are horrible, but man alive they can be frustrating to sit through at times. Again, that’s true of so many things TNA does and they make it hard to be a fan for more than a little while at a time. Check out some of the better matches, but I wouldn’t recommend putting yourself through the full shows most of the time.
Bound For Glory 2012 (2014 Redo): Sting and Hogan. Just Go With It.
Bound For Glory 2012
Date: October 14, 2012
Location: Grand Canyon University Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 2,900
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
It’s the age of the bikers now as the Aces and 8’s storyline has taken over TNA. This story started back in June and would still be going (kind of) at NEXT YEAR’S Bound For Glory because TNA doesn’t know how to just let something go. Again the real main event isn’t for the World Title, but rather Sting and Bully Ray facing off with two of the masked members of Aces and 8’s with access to the Impact Zone on the line. There’s also something about Jeff Hardy winning the Bound For Glory Series and challenging for the World Title but let’s get to the important stuff like Sting with Hogan in his corner. Let’s get to it.
Before I get started, I have to give this show praise for its tagline: The Memories Are Waiting. That actually gave me a chill when I first heard it and it still really works.
The opening video focuses on the moments at Bound For Glory. Oddly enough a lot of them focus on Sting. This really does make the show look like the biggest event of the year which is a very important thing for a wrestling company to have.
The announcers hype up the show and run down the card.
We have an old school ramp to the ring.
X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Zema Ion
Ion is defending and is obsessed with his hair. There’s no story here because there wasn’t time to get one together. Literally the Thursday before the show, Van Dam came out and said he was challenging for the title here. The fans are entirely behind Rob here as you would expect them to be. Feeling out process to start as Rob goes after Ion’s hair to take over. A few kicks to the face send Zema outside but he’s able to run away from Rob’s dive.
Back in and Rob ducks a clothesline but gets caught by a low dropkick. The ring is very loud here. Something like a Whisper in the Wind gets two for the champion but he gets crotched on the ropes and kicked back out to the floor. Rob takes a well deserved bow as this has been mostly one sided so far. The champ comes back in by diving through the ropes into a tornado DDT for a pair of near falls.
Rob gets shoved off the top and down onto the barricade, setting up a big flip dive from Ion. Zema throws him back in and blocks a monkey flip with a kind of hot shot. A missile dropkick gets two on Rob and the champion puts on an abdominal stretch to slow things down. That goes nowhere so they slug it out until Rob throws him into the air for a dropkick to the ribs. Rolling Thunder sets up the Five Star for the clean pin and the title.
Rating: C+. I liked this more than I thought I would with Ion being a perfectly adequate foil for the feel good title win. Rob broke a bit of a sweat here but there wasn’t a huge doubt as to who was winning. Ion had been champion for three months at this point and there wasn’t much else he could do with it so giving it to Rob to make him look like he still means something is a good idea.
Magnus says tonight is the biggest night of the year for everyone. Tonight, there is no more hiding behind Hogan for Samoa Joe and Magnus gets his TV Title.
TV Title: Magnus vs. Samoa Joe
Joe is defending. They used to be partners but Magnus went to the dark side after they lost the Tag Team Titles. Joe won the TV Title and Magnus wants a shot due to the tag team issues and Joe beating him in some BFG Series matches. Feeling out process to start with both guys sending the other to the corner. Magnus’ handshake offer is declined and Joe nails a hard big boot to the jaw. The Brit takes over with a clothesline and pounds away in the corner.
A knee to the face puts Joe down and a Michinoku Driver gets two. Joe gets all fired up and runs Magnus over before getting two off the running backsplash. There’s the STF followed by the Rings of Saturn but Magnus gets his foot on the ropes. Joe’s MuscleBuster and superplex attempts are broken up with a kick to the head and the top rope elbow gets two. Joe puts on the Clutch but Magnus climbs the ropes and flips over to escape. A chop block puts the champion down and he loads up the Figure Four, only to be countered into the Cluth to retain Joe’s title.
Rating: C-. Totally basic match here that could have been on any episode of Impact. Magnus just didn’t have it yet but would show some good improvement in the next year. At the same time, Joe was his normal self here as we’re in the middle of his latest push that wouldn’t go anywhere of note.
Roode says this hatred between him and Storm has been building for a year but ends tonight. I’m sure. Special referee King Mo won’t be a factor and Roode is going to send Storm home forever.
We recap Roode vs. Storm. As you might remember, Roode turned on Storm to win the World Title just after Bound For Glory 2011. This set up their huge showdown at Lockdown 2012 in Storm’s hometown after one heck of a build. Storm destroyed Roode for twenty minutes…..and then accidentally knocked him out of the cage so Roode retained the title.
Again, TNA had the chance to make a new star and just didn’t for….well I can’t say no apparent reason as Storm was banged up, but there was no reason to not give him the title there and then deal with the injury later. You give him the win and the fans get the moment. The reign itself doesn’t matter. See Mick Foley in 1999 for further proof. Anyway tonight it’s a street fight to blow off the feud, even though the cage match was the blowoff already.
Bobby Roode vs. James Storm
Street fight. MMA fighter King Mo is outside referee and comes out in a robe and crown. They stare each other down before Storm takes over with a bunch of right hands. A big backdrop puts Roode down and they head outside. Roode gets rammed face first into the apron but comes back with a shot to the face, only to stop and stare at Mo. Storm nails a Russian legsweep to send Bobby into the barricade to take over.
The Eye of the Storm through the announcers’ table doesn’t work as Roode slips down the back and sends Storm into the post to bust him open. He brings in a chair to knock Storm down even more as the blood is flowing. They head back inside with Roode bringing in a kendo stick, only to drop it to wedge a chair in the corner. Storm picks up the stick and nails Roode before putting a trashcan between Roode’s legs and driving it home with the stick.
An Elevated DDT onto the ramp knocks Roode silly but Storm is weak from the blood loss. A fan hands Storm a crutch for a shot to Roode’s ribs and Bobby is in trouble again. They slug it out with trashcan lids on the ramp and King Mo isn’t sure what to think. Roode finally goes down after a trashcan shot but he comes back with a spinebuster on the ramp.
They fight to the floor where Storm drinks a beer and takes Roode over to the announcers’ table. Bobby fights out of a suplex attempt which clearly wasn’t going to hit and spears Storm off one table and through another. That’s only good for two as Storm’s blood is all over Bobby’s back. He goes after Hebner but Mo gets in the ring and slaps Roode into Closing Time from Storm. The Last Call gets two and Storm is stunned.
Another Last Call is blocked and Roode sends him head first into the chair in the corner for two, even with a handful of trunks. Storm is sat on the top rope for a chair shot to the back….and it’s tacks time. Bobby loads up a superplex onto the tacks but gets shoved onto them instead, followed by a top rope elbow from Storm for two. A low blow puts Storm down and Roode brings in a six pack of beer. Storm returns the low blow and breaks the beer bottle over Roode’s head in the same move that started the feud. Bobby is out on his feet and the Last Call into the tacks gives Storm the pin.
Rating: B+. It’s a really good brawl but the Lockdown match really holds it back. This match comes off like Rock vs. Austin at Wrestlemania XIX: Storm wins here but it really doesn’t mean anything more than revenge. He lost the big match when everything was on the line and now looks like a choker. Still though, it’s a great bloody brawl with Storm looking like he went through a meat grinder. I have no idea why Mo needed to be here though as he didn’t do a thing.
Joey Ryan says he should have been given a contract before he was on Gut Check but Al Snow and the Gut Check judges thought they knew better than 87% of the Impact audience. He’s the opposite of Snow and they’re on his turf tonight. Politicking isn’t going to save Snow tonight because tonight, Ryan is bringing sleazy back to Bound For Glory.
That promo basically covered the recap. Ryan was on Gut Check and got 87% of the fan vote, but the judges said no. Joey showed up at some shows and tried to get on camera, even punching Snow over the barricade at one point. Tonight it’s Snow vs. Ryan for a contract.
Joey Ryan vs. Al Snow
Snow offers to start in an amateur position and easily takes Joey down for some slaps to the back of the head. They head to the corner with Snow dropping him with an elbow and hiptoss. Off to a headlock for a bit before Ryan nails a clothesline and rubs his own chest. Back up and a right hand knocks Snow’s head back for one of the most out there looks I’ve ever seen.
Some clotheslines drop Ryan and there are the headbutts to the chest. The Snow Plow gets two so Snow grabs Head from under the ring. The referee tries to take it away and gets crushed for his efforts. Joey kisses the Head for some reason but misses a baseball slide and gets caught in the ring skirt. Al grabs Head again but Matt Morgan returns through the crowd and kicks Snow’s head (not Head) off. Snow is thrown back in and Ryan gets the easy pin.
Rating: D. This doesn’t hold up very well though Snow hadn’t been active in a major promotion for years now. Joey was much better as a character or talker than an in ring guy but you had to get him on the roster somehow. The story for this wasn’t bad but the actual match didn’t hold up.
Bad Influence says they’re the team the women want to be with and the men just want to be. They’re going to run down their challengers tonight and wash it down with a delicious Appletini.
We recap the Tag Team Title three way. It’s basically good team vs. evil team vs. dream team.
Tag Team Titles: Bad Influence vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez vs. Kurt Angle/AJ Styles
These teams have feuded over the titles all summer. Styles and Chavo get things going with Chavo getting two off a shoulder block. AJ takes him into the corner for the tag off to Angle and a nice reaction from the crowd. Kurt hammers away but Daniels tags himself in to take over on AJ. A fast series of tags gives us Hernandez suplexing AJ before Chavo gets two off a slingshot hilo.
Kaz tags himself in but walks into the drop down into the dropkick. Styles brings in Angle who gets driven into the corner, allowing Chavo to come in and work over Kaz in the corner. Chavo brings in Herenadnez for the over the shoulder backbreaker and it’s quickly off to Daniels vs. Styles. Daniels avoids a charge in the corner and Kaz nails a hard clothesline from the apron. Off to Kaz for a slingshot legdrop and a pelvic thrust at Guerrero and Hernandez.
Daniels hiptosses Daniels on AJ for two and we hit a full nelson on the mat. Back up and AJ escapes a monkey flip but avoids a tag from Hernandez and Chavo so he can Pele Kaz down. A double tag brings in Daniels and Angle with Kurt cleaning house. Kaz gets caught in rolling Germans but Daniels climbs his partner for a sunset flip, only to be countered into an ankle lock. Angle misses a charge into the corner but belly to bellies Kaz into Daniels for two.
Chavo and Hernandez are knocked back to the floor so Kaz can hit the slingshot DDT on Angle. Hernandez runs in and knocks Kaz across the ring, only to have AJ knock SuperMex across the ring. Daniels moonsaults out to take out Angle but turns around into a huge dive from Hernandez. AJ isn’t about to be one upped so he fakes a dive onto Guerrero and dives onto Hernandez and Bad Influence for a huge crash. Back in and Chavo tries the Three Amigos on Angle but gets caught in the Angle Slam.
Hernandez breaks up the moonsault and sets for the Border Toss, only to have AJ tag himself in and save his partner. Kurt misses a charge and falls out to the floor, allowing Kaz to slam Styles down. The BME gets two on AJ and Daniels is STUNNED. Chavo dives out to the floor to take Kaz out as AJ escapes Angel’s Wings and nails the moonsault reverse DDT on Daniels. Hernandez tags himself in and drills Daniels with a slingshot shoulder followed by the Border Toss and Frog Splash from Chavo for the pin and the titles.
Rating: B. This was a fun and fast paced three way but unfortunately it would start one of the least interesting title reigns in recorded history. Guerrero and Hernandez were really good in the ring but man alive would they drive things into the ground during their promos. The match was really awesome stuff though with some great spots and saves but it never got to that highest level.
The new champions celebrate post match.
We recap Tara vs. Tessmacher. This is the old mentor vs. mentee story with Tara teaching Tessmacher everything she knew, only to have Tessmacher win the title. Tara couldn’t beat her and got pinned, so she turned heel and set up a rematch. She also has a Hollywood boyfriend who is debuting tonight.
Knockouts Title: Tara vs. Miss Tessmacher
The cast of British Bootcamp, including Rockstar Spud, is in the front row. Taryn Terrell is referee, as she was for every Knockouts match for awhile. They stare each other down to start and Tessmacher gets a few rollups for two each on the challenger. A headscissors puts Tara down again but she comes back with a knee to the ribs and a baseball slide to send Tessmacher out to the floor.
Back in and Tara poses a lot but gets caught in a sunset flip for two. Tara charges into a boot in the corner and gets DDTed for two. Back up and Tessmacher goes nuts with clotheslines followed by a spining clothesline for two. A top rope hurricanrana puts Tara down but she avoids a top rope elbow. The Widow’s Peak gives Tara the title back.
Rating: C-. This was just a step above a standard Knockouts match, meaning it really wasn’t all that good. Like most other Knockouts, Tara can only win so many titles before they just stop meaning anything. At least Tessmacher was a fresh name in the division, but the post match stuff at least validates the new champion.
Tara introduces her Hollywood boyfriend: Jesse from Big Brother. Kissing ensues, accompanied by a big “WHO ARE YOU” chant.
We see Sting’s Hall of Fame induction from last night, making him the first member.
We recap Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Bully Ray. The bikers have taken over the company and kidnapped Joseph Park. Hulk agreed to a tag match at Bound For Glory in exchange for Park’s release. It’s two TNA guys (Hogan can’t be one) vs. two Aces tonight. If the bikers win, they get full access to the Impact Zone but if they lose, they’re gone. At this point, we still don’t know any members of the group.
Ray volunteered to team with Sting to stand up for TNA, which would wind up being a huge plot point later on. The best part of this whole thing was when the Aces had Hogan in their clubhouse. Hogan agreed to the tag match and said he was one of the guys. The Aces boss: “Hogan, for once in your life this isn’t about you!”
Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Bully Ray
No DQ and Ray has Sting face paint on. The Aces still have Park with them and he’s now conscious. Keep in mind that Park had figured out who the Aces’ leader was, or at least a lot about them, at this point. That’s also going to be a big plot point later on. It’s a huge brawl to start on the floor with the very big Aces quickly getting beaten down. The Bikers fights back with right hands as the fans are chanting for Hogan.
Ray and Sting double team we’ll say #1 with an elbow to the head and a piece of a table to the same spot. #1 comes back by whipping Ray into the steps and avoids a Stinger Splash against the barricade. They finally get inside with #2 working over Sting with uppercuts and a slam for two. Off to #1 with a clothesline for two as we see Park handcuffed to the barricade.
The bikers start double teaming but Sting no sells a slam and Hulks Up but the Scorpion on #1 is quickly broken up. A Death Drop out of nowhere plants #1 but Sting tags Ray instead of covering. Ray cleans house with elbows and a middle rope shoulder but #1 gets in a knee to the back from the apron. Ray comes right back with a double clothesline to drop the Aces and a splash gets two on #1.
Sting and #2 get in a fight on the floor and #1 brings in a chair. Bully kicks it out of his hands but a third member comes in with a low blow. He spits at Park so Joseph rips the handcuffs off the barricade and hammers away on the third guy. All four of the regular guys are in the ring now and we get a Doomsday Device on #1. There’s a Stinger Splash to #2 and Sting wants the tables. #1 pulls Sting to the floor for a brawl and a fourth Ace comes in for a spinebuster to put Ray through the table, giving #2 the pin.
Rating: C. There was only so much you could do with something like this the bikers were just faceless monsters so the match shouldn’t have been any kind of a wrestling clinic. That being said, Sting can only do so much in the ring so keeping it as a brawl was a good idea. On top of that, this was all about the story instead of the wrestling so they could do almost whatever they wanted out there.
The rest of the team came in for the beatdown until Hogan comes out. Like any villain group worth their salt, they sent attackers at Hogan one at a time so he can punch them all down. Eventually the guy that interfered is left alone with Sting, Ray and Hogan. The masked man is beaten down and Hulk unmasks him to reveal….D-Von, whose contract expired while he was still TV Champion and hasn’t been seen in months. Everyone is stunned that it’s D-Von, who says it was always him.
So yeah, TNA spent four months on this and the first thing we get is D-Von. The response to this was almost universally negative as it felt like a huge letdown. At the end of the day, D-Von is the quieter member of a tag team who won a mostly meaningless TV Title earlier in the year. For him to be the first reveal and in theory the leader of the team, the whole idea sounds laughable. Look at the visual you have: Bully Ray, Sting and HULK HOGAN against D-Von and a bunch of faceless fighters. Why in the world should I care about something like that? Naturally this story went on for another year because….well why not.
As for the two plot points, I think it’s safe to explain these as this show is two years old. First off there’s Park, who found out the identity of at least multiple Aces and 8’s members and maybe even the leader. He was free by the end of the match….AND HE DIDN’T GO TELL HOGAN? Hulk had wanted to talk to Park for weeks and apparently he didn’t say anything immediately?
It gets worse, because to the best of my knowledge, Park NEVER SAID ANYTHING. This brings us to the other plot point. Bully Ray signed up for this match and of course eventually became the leader of Aces and 8’s. They did a good job with the build, but people had it figured out by January or so. Again, that’s not a bad thing though and Ray had raised his game so much that he more than deserved the spot.
Austin Aries says he’s done everything he’s said he would do with confidence but tonight he’s going to do it with anger. He’s defending against Jeff Hardy tonight and had a really weak heel turn like a week before the show to give the match a story.
We recap Aries vs. Hardy, which is all about Jeff Hardy’s redemption after being high on something at Victory Road 2011. Aries said he was tired of being told what to do and now he’s going to be himself. He wanted to know why Hardy got all this special treatment and attacked Jeff on Impact, calling him a failure.
TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Austin Aries
Aries is defending and parades around with the belt to start. Jeff shoves him into the corner before they hit the mat for some amateur stuff. They’re wrestling like they have a lot of time which usually makes for a good match. Back up and Aries looks annoyed as Hardy takes him into the corner. Jeff hammers away but gets caught in a headlock, only to counter into a headscissors. Aries escapes with a headstand but misses his dropkick.
The second attempt works a bit better though and Hardy is knocked silly. Aries chokes with a boot but goes outside for a victory lap instead of covering. Back in and Aries tells Jeff to wait a minute, earning him a suplex. Austin rolls to the floor and gets nailed with an ax handle to the back to put him down again. Jeff nails Poetry in Motion off the steps to drive Aries into the barricade and we go back inside.
The champ avoids a dropkick and gets two off a middle rope elbow. He hammers away in the corner and stops a quick splash attempt by raising his knees. A backbreaker gets another near fall and Aries puts on an abdominal stretch on the mat. Hardy fights up again as the fans are split on who to cheer for. The brainbuster is countered and Hardy nails the sitout front suplex. Aries takes him back down and gets two more off a slingshot spinning splash.
Jeff blocks the Last Chancery and picks Aries up for a powerbomb, only to drop him backwards for a big crash. A basement dropkick gets two for Hardy and the Whisper in the Wind gets the same. The Twist of Fate is blocked but Jeff kicks Aries to the floor and into the barricade. He avoids a big plancha though, setting up the suicide dive to send Hardy into the barricade again. It works so well that Aries hits it again but Jeff gets up at two.
Austin is busted open after ramming his head into the steel but it only makes him cover Jeff even harder. The Last Chancery goes on now and only lasts a few seconds as usual. Aries takes him to the ramp for a brainbuster but Jeff counters into a Twist of Fate attempt. That goes nowhere either as Aries sends him back inside with a clothesline. He slams Jeff head first onto the edge of the ramp and Hardy looks out of it. A missile dropkick makes things even worse but Jeff blocks the running corner dropkick.
The Twist of Fate out of nowhere gets two and Hardy goes up top, only to get crotched back down. A great looking jumping top rope hurricanrana puts Jeff down again and now the running dropkick connects. The brainbuster is only good for two and Aries is spent. With nothing left to throw, Aries tries a double stomp out of the Tree of Woe but Jeff rolls away. Another Twist and the Swanton give us a new champion.
Rating: A-. This was the kind of wrestling match they needed to close out the show but the angle and match felt tacked on after the previous stuff. Hardy winning the title back is a good story but Aries didn’t need to turn heel. This made him feel like a villain for Hardy to vanquish rather than a champion in a huge showdown. That being said, it’s a really good match with both guys taking everything the other had and surviving. Excellent main event.
Overall Rating: B+. This show holds up a lot better than I expected it to. The wrestling is good and again, the big reveal doesn’t bother me as much without spending all the months on the build. There’s more than enough stuff here to carry it with the street fight, Tag Team Title match and main event all being good to very good matches. As usual, when TNA cuts out the nonsense and just lets its wrestlers wrestle, good things happen. This show worked and I had a good time watching it, which is rare for TNA.
Ratings Comparison
Rob Van Dam vs. Zema Ion
Original: C
Redo: C+
Magnus vs. Samoa Joe
Original: C+
Redo: C-
Bobby Roode vs. James Storm
Original: B+
Redo: B+
Joey Ryan vs. Al Snow
Original: D+
Redo: D
Bad Influence vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez vs. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle
Original: B
Redo: B
Miss Tessmacher vs. Tara
Original: D
Redo: C-
Sting/Bully Ray vs. Aces and 8’s
Original: C
Redo: C
Jeff Hardy vs. Austin Aries
Original: B+
Redo: A-
Overall Rating
Original: B
Redo: B+
Like I said, we’re at the point where not a lot is going to change.