Today is another instance of there’s no one interesting today so here’s one of my favorites: 2 Cold Scorpio.

Scorpio got his start in Japan in the late 80s but got his first American exposure in WCW, debuting at Clash of the Champions 21 as a mystery partner for WCW World Champion Ron Simmons.

Cactus Jack/Tony Atlas/Barbarian vs. Ron Simmons/Too Cold Scorpio

Ok so Simmons is world champion and is feuding with various guys because they wanted to make Simmons seem like he had something to do while making the WCW Title a midcard title so that guys like Great Muta and Chono, NWA guys, could be the REAL focus of the show. Simmons vs. Barbarian was the WCW Title match at Halloween Havoc. Let that sink in for a bit.

This is Scorpio’s debut and the good guys sprint to the ring with the announcers having no clue what Scorpio’s name is. This match with having only one white guy in it is Watts’ attempt to make the company believe he’s not racist and of course he made the black dude worthless and the title a joke until Sting saved it. Jack is legit injured here so he was a manager for the most part. Somehow injured he was miles ahead of the guys he managed.

Atlas looks like a freaking tank here. There was supposed to be some guy named Robbie Walker as Simmons’ partner. Considering this is Scorpio when he was young and in awesome shape and totally mind blowing, I think he upgraded. Yeah he’s 27 here as is Jack so both guys are young and just awesome. Scorpio misses a moonsault completely and kicks Jack in the head so he has to tag.

Jack and Simmons now as Barbarian was in there all of 10 seconds. Remember: Jack is badly hurt here but he’s the only credible guy on his team. Ah, it’s the #1 contender: Barbarian. Yes that Barbarian. It’s weird hearing them constantly saying “Simmons’ partner” because they really don’t know who he is. Atlas comes in and is just old. He’s still ripped though so that helps.

Barbarian beats on him a bit but then Jack has to be the one to get kicked in the head. Hot tag to Scorpio who blows the roof off the place. He was SO far ahead of his time it’s not even funny. Barbarian misses the big boot to Simmons which kills Atlas and with Simmons holding the other two off, Scorpio unleashes the 450 which is more or less the national debut of it and you can’t hear Ross’ commentary (which is more or less him losing his mind) over how loud the fans are. Naturally that gets the pin.

Rating: B-. This was to do two things: further the Simmons vs. Jack’s team feud and the bigger one: make 2 Cold Scorpio look AMAZING. To say the very least regarding the second one, JACKPOT. The fans loved him as more or less he was a 240 pound Rey Mysterio and keeping in mind this is 1992, this was completely revolutionary stuff. Awesome debut and everything worked like a charm. Match sucked when him or Jack wasn’t in there though.

Scorpio would become a big deal on his own as a singles guy, including receiving an NWA World Title shot at Clash of the Champions 23.

NWA World Title: Barry Windham vs. 2 Cold Scorpio

This could be bad but it could be good. Windham was just holding the title for a little while before Flair got it back in about a month. Jesse asks what kind of name Scope is. Jesse brings up that he was in the Navy and Norfolk is a naval town so he’s happy here. No one believes Windham has any chance of losing here as Scorpio was young, talented and over so of course the NWA can’t let him have the belt. That’s Flair’s belt blast it.

Jesse wants to know who Jordan is betting on tonight. That’s a great line. Scorpio kicks out of a leaping, and I use that term loosely, DDT. Hey! Wanna know how Badd is? Call the Hotline and find out! Yes, we’ll not only give out private medical records, we’ll charge you for them! Windham punches the heck out of Scorpio and this is pretty one sided.

Fans are into it though so that works. In a very cool move, Scorpio is on the apron and hits a slingshot, note that it’s not a springboard, 450. Scorpio’s comeback is very good but in the end he gets caught just like you would expect him to. The Leaping DDT ends it to retain Windham’s title.

Rating: B. This was way better than it should have been. When Scorpio wasn’t fat and was actually motivated, he could go with anyone and that’s what he did here. Solid match all around although the ending sucked to a fairly large extent just out of boringness. The double title thing still didn’t work.

On to the tag team division that Scorpio was best known for. He would hook up with Marcus Bagwell for a Tag Team Title show on the October 23, 1993 episode of WCW Saturday Night.

Tag Titles: Marcus Bagwell/2 Cold Scorpio vs. Nasty Boys

Naties are defending. Knobbs shoves Scorpio into the corner to start and it’s quickly off to Sags who does…..nothing at all. Back to Knobbs who walks into a slam before a slingshot moonsault gets two for Scorpio. He puts on a hammerlock with his feet before it’s off to Bagwell for a double faceplant. We hit the armbar by Marcus and the challengers take turns working over the arm. Brian fights back and makes the tag off to Jerry who walks into the same arm work.

A double dropkick puts Jerry down again and Scorpio puts on another armbar. 2 Cold goes up but completely misses a splash to change control. A Knobbs distraction lets Sags get in a chair shot to the back and Scorpio is in big trouble. He’s able to kick out at two though as the fans chant WHOMP THERE IT IS. Back to Knobbs for a gutwrench slam but Bagwell breaks up the count at two.

We hit the abdominal stretch from Brian but Sags comes back in for some elbows on the bad ribs. Scorpio tries to fight back but gets caught in a bearhug to keep things slow. He finally fights out of it with something resembling a bulldog and an enziguri is enough for the hot tag to Bagwell. Marcus fights off both guys and everything breaks down. Sags and Scorpio are whipped into each other but Jerry gets up fast enough to drop a top rope ax handle on Marcus, only to pull him up at two. Sags lifts him up for a slam but Scorpio dropkicks them both down, putting Bagwell on top for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C-. Not a very good match here but I’ve seen far worse. This was the definition of a meaningless title reign as they would lose the belts back the next night at Halloween Havoc. Bagwell and Scorpio felt like a pair of guys thrown together and they weren’t much more than that at all.

Soon after this it would be off to an NWA territory known as Eastern Championship Wrestling for an NWA World Title tournament. Here’s Scorpio vs. Shane Douglas in the finals.

NWA World Title: Shane Douglas vs. 2 Cold Scorpio

And we get no entrances or anything like that. Joey said a quick thing about this is it and we cut to the bell ringing. I’m fairly certain that Shane is heel here but it’s not incredibly clear. Yeah he definitely is. The locker room is out to watch this. They try to tie this into the classic NWA guys like Race and Thesz, but for some reason the WHOMP There it is chant hurts the credibility on that one.

They do some decent stuff but it’s a tad sloppy which hurts it a bit. I wonder what Shane is thinking as he knows what he will be doing in about fifteen minutes. They lock up for about the fifth time in two minutes. We get it guys. You can do the most basic move on the planet. They do a bunch of small packages and reversals that aren’t bad but it’s hardly the masterpiece that Joey wants you to think it is.

To change the pace a lot, we have a lock up. A top rope cross body gets two and we hit a chinlock. You can really tell how far the title has fallen when it was eleven years before this when Starrcade aired and the company hit its peak. A top rope dropkick puts Shane on the floor and we have a sign that says I’ve Got Crabs. You can really feel the spirits of Thesz and Kiniski here can’t you?

They really do try to put this over as a classic. Well give Joey a point for trying of course. What they don’t point out most of the time is that Douglas beat Terry Funk for the ECW Title coming into this. Barely Legal was far from Funk’s first title reign. We get back in the ring with Shane somewhat in control.

It amuses me that this was supposed to be the biggest match of all time according to Joey, but that weekend we had Owen vs. Bret in a cage at Summerslam. Anyway, Scorpio misses a moonsault and Shane hits a belly to belly for the win. Scorpio says that Shane was better tonight but he’ll be back. Nice job on stealing the spotlight there buddy.

Rating: C+. This was nothing entertaining at all really. It’s just a match with limited heat and not very good wrestling. I get that this is supposed to mean something in the long run, but dang man, there was just nothing to talk about here at all. It’s not bad but there are about a million better matches.

Then some other stuff happened after the match.

Scorpio is one of the few guys that has been all over the world so we’ll take a look at some of his stuff with other companies. This is one such match from a AAA show, though it took place in Los Angeles.

Tito Santana/Pegasus Kid/2 Cold Scorpio vs. La Parka/Blue Panther/Jerry Estrada

This is IWC vs. AAA. Pegasus Kid you know as Chris Benoit and yes that’s the same Tito Santana you’re familiar with. Estrada is a brawler, Panther is a masked guy and captain and La Parka is La Parka. Scorpio is starting us off but Estrada and Parka fight over who starts. Instead it’s Panther who takes Scorpio to the mat to a HUGE pop. I’m a big Scorpio and Santana fan so I think you know which team I like here.

Off to Benoit vs. Parka. The Parka team is WAY more popular as they’re technically the hometown team. Santana comes in but Estrada and Parka fight over who gets to face Santana. Tito in black trunks is an odd sight to see. Also this is just Tito, not El Matador. Mike says Tito is clearly the weak link on his team. That’s not exactly what I’d say but he’s the Professor.

Parka won’t tag in, ticking Estrada off even more. Benoit and Panther come in to speed things way up and Benoit hits a huge suicide dive to the floor. Benoit is the captain of his team so if he loses it’s over. Scorpio and Parka come in and try to out overdo it. They slug it out but neither guy can take over. Parka fakes taking a low blow and both guys hit the floor. That allows Estrada vs. Santana to come in. Remember that’s legal here.

Estrada is sent to the floor and it’s off to Benoit vs. Panther again. They’re both in blue so that works out well. Benoit hooks the snap suplex but an elbow misses. Parka is tagged in and he walks along the apron for a bit first. The Canadian hits a German on the Mexican and it’s back to Panther again, this time against 2 Cold. They look like their chemistry is way off at times in this.

A powerbomb puts Parka down but Estrada comes in, breaks it up, kicks Parka a bit for good measure and now the heels can’t figure out who to get in. Ok so now it’s Tito vs. Panther. Benoit comes in but misses the swan dive. Scorpio misses his huge moonsault as well. I get why Panther is a champion. La Parka and Estrada fight over who gets to cover Scorpio so it’s back to Panther again.

Parka sends Santana to the floor and sets to dive but hits Estrada of course. Scorpio hits a big dive to take everyone out. Panther misses a moonsault so Benoit hits a Matt Hardy legdrop for two. Panther tries a powerbomb on Chris but Benoit rolls through into a rana for the pin and ZERO reaction, which also might be a cultural thing.

Rating: C. I liked it a little better than the previous one but it’s no classic or anything. The idea here was two different styles and in that theory it worked. At the same time though, the tagging thing isn’t something I can get used to inside of an hour, which is how long this has been going on. It was fine but it’s something I think I’d like a lot more if I watched lucha libre more often.

In 1995, WCW held a show in North Korea which had an audience of, I kid you not, 180,000 people. Scorpio was on the card, facing Wild Pegasus.

2 Cold Scorpio vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is named Wild Pegasus here. Eric talks about how the lives in Korea are as so much is closed off to them and they have never seen anything like this. This really is something to see. New Japan is co-promoting with WCW here so you’ll see a lot of puro in this. This is a pretty choreographed and gymnastics based match to start which the fans applaud.

It’s so strange to see a totally new audience see something like this. If nothing else it’s cool to see their reaction to seeing something like this which they’ve never seen before. Onoo is playing a heel here that only likes the Japanese guys. His voice is very hard to hear as he’s really soft spoken. Benoit hits a jumping tombstone and the headbutt hits on Scorpio for the pin.

Rating: C+. These are hard matches to grade. There are no angles or anything to them as this is really just an exhibition and an attempt to expose wrestling to a brand new audience, even though they’ll hardly ever see it again. That being said, I’m not expecting much from these matches, but it’s nice to see. The grades will be far less harsh based on how these matches are going to be drawn up.

Back to ECW, where Scorpio would win the Tag Team Titles in a singles match against Rocco Rock. He would choose Sandman as his partner and defend the titles at November 2 Remember 1995.

Tag Titles: 2 Cold Scorpio/Sandman vs. Public Enemy

Woman manages Scorpio and Sandman who are champions (along with Scorpio being TV Champion) and come out to Whomp There It Is. Whoever gets the fall here faces Mikey Whipwreck later in the show for the world title. Woman is kind of hot actually. She could look rather good at times. Scorpio dances a lot while we’re waiting on the Public Enemy to get here.

I have no idea what the face/heel alignment is here but I think Public Enemy is face. According to Gertner the TV Title is on the line here also. Yeah apparently Sandman and Scorpio are the heels here. Sandman is billed from…..Utah? Seriously? Scorpio is doing a thing where he says he doesn’t weigh as much as he really does. He does have a gut on him.

Public Enemy is leaving soon after this for ECW apparently. Scorpio offers them a chance to leave so let’s have a dance off. Uh…..ok? Scorpio cuts a rug and Joey dances too. The camera catches him and his reaction is great. Rocco does a robot which isn’t horrible. Scorpio does one also and destroys him. And now we set dancing back about a thousand years with Sandman dancing too. Joey: “Yes but can he walk a straight line?” They want Woman to dance and it’s very short. Crowd is WAY into this.

The champs jump the dancing morons but Public Enemy clears the ring quickly. AND IT’S TIME TO DANCE! The music is still playing as I think we have a comedy match on our hands. Just a hunch mind you. Ok so now we’re ready to go with Sandman vs. Grunge. Sandy grabs a headlock but is sent to the floor. Everything breaks down quickly and they all head to the floor.

Everyone grabs a chair and gets back in the ring for a good old fashioned duel. Sandman and Grunge are thrown to the floor and Scorpio follows. They fight up the aisle and a fan offers 2 Cold a frying pan. He steals someone’s prosthetic hand instead. Well why not? Sandman goes into the crowd and Grunge is busted open. He hits a splash for two on Scorpio as we’re bordering on having a regular match.

Rocco hits Sandman with a pumpkin pie and Sandy is in the crowd again. Woman pulls Sandman out of the crowd. Sandman tags himself in and he jumps over the top (!!!) with something like a dropkick. Rocco comes in and hits a headscissors to take over. Slingshot legdrop by Sandman but he doesn’t cover.

Off to Scorpio who hits a slingshot splash for two. Scorpio vs. Rock at the moment if you’re all lost. Rock avoids a dropkick and escapes a tilt-a-whirl, only to miss a moonsault. The fans chant for SD Jones for some reason as Scorpio hits a double underhook powerbomb which is broken up at two.

Standing moonsault eats knees and it’s off to Sandman. Rocco (they’re Rocco Rock and Johnny Grunge if you’re totally confused by me changing named) still can’t bring in Grunge so Grunge comes in and pounds on Sandman. Woman cracks Rocco with a kendo stick and Sandman dives over the top to take out Grunge. Sandman gets backdropped onto a table which doesn’t break. FREAKING OW MAN.

Grunge finally goes through the table and everything breaks down even further. Rock hits a big moonsault to the floor as they need to end this soon. A broom handle is brought in from somewhere with Scorpio taking over with it. There it goes though so 2 Cold settles for a Stinger Splash and moonsault for two on Rocco. We’re tagging again now and Grunge gets the hot tag. Sandman comes in sans tag but Public Enemy screws up their finisher and Sandman falls on top for the pin.

Rating: D. Yeah this went too long. These guys aren’t the ones you want having seventeen minutes. This was better as a comedy match but then again I might have just wanted to see Woman dance. Either way, not much here and Sandman getting the pin was pretty much the only logical choice since he lost the title to Mikey in the first place.

After a few more months in ECW it was off to the WWF where Scorpio would become a pimp in a zoot suit named Flash Funk. One of his first big matches was at In Your House 12.

Leif Cassidy vs. Flash Funk

 

Cassidy is more famous as Al Snow but is one half of the New Rockers here. Funk is more famous as 2 Cold Scorpio and is basically a pimp without calling him as much. He has Funkettes and funk music, basically making him the original Brodus Clay. Even Vince dances to the theme song a bit. After a long dance sequence by Funk and his girls we’re ready to go. Funk shoves Cassidy into the ropes to start and dances a bit, only angering Leif as a result.

 

They trade wristlocks until Flash spins around and grabs an armbar on the mat. Cassidy spins up but a flying snap mare takes him right back down. Funk flips out of a Boston crab attempt and takes Leif down into a headlock. Back up and Flash tries to go up but slips off the ropes, only to pop back up and hit a cross body to set up another armbar. A headscissors out of the corner is countered into a reverse powerbomb by Cassidy and the Rocker takes over.

 

Cassidy blocks a right hand and traps Funk’s arms for some headbutts, followed by a belly to belly over the top and out to the floor. Leif follows it up with a springboard moonsault to the floor in a great looking dive. Back in and we hit the chinlock but Flash fights up and dances a bit more. Another powerbomb attempt by Cassidy is countered and Flash lands on his feet, dancing again. Leif comes back with a sitout spinebuster for a very delayed two count. Off to a modified dragon sleeper but Leif lets him go very quickly for some reason.

 

Funk avoids a middle rope moonsault as you can see a lot of empty seats not that far from the ring. Funk hits the ropes and cartwheels into a spinning enziguri, sending Leif out tot he floor. Another big dive takes Cassidy down before a gorgeous top rope moonsault gets two for Funk. They trade some quick rollups for two each until Flash scores with an enziguri and the Funky Flash Splash (450 and yes that’s the real name) gets the pin. We even get a rare error from JR who calls it a Shooting Star Press.

 

Rating: B-. This took awhile to get going but for its time, this was pretty awesome. Funk is a personal favorite of mine who could fly like few other mainstream guys at this time. Cassidy was no slouch either but it would take an absurd gimmick to get him noticed, which is a shame at the\\\ end of the day.

Continuing the international theme, Flash was on the March 3, 1997 episode of Raw, held in Germany.

Sultan vs. Flash Funk

Sultan is Rikishi. Jim Ross has joined us on commentary. Lawler calls in and yells at Vince for having ECW guys on Raw. Didn’t Jerry invite him? If the ECW guys show up next week, Lawler will finish the fight. After a break the match is joined in progress with Sultan running him over. Flash does his usual flying around the ring to get in some offense but Sultan hooks him in a sleeper. Heyman calls in to say Lawler is over the line. The challenge is accepted but it might not be next week. Standing rana sets up a top rope moonsault for two by Funk. Sultan counters a headscissors and the camel clutch ends this quick.

Rating: C-. This match was fine but it’s by far and away the weakest of the matches as far as star power goes. Good match here as Funk is always someone I love watching. Sultan was a dead end gimmick and more or less stopped meaning anything after Mania when Rocky beat him in the IC Title match.

To England, from One Night Only, a one off show (appropriately enough) from Birmingham in September of 1997.

Flash Funk vs. The Patriot

Flash Funk is more commonly known as 2 Cold Scorpio and is a pimp without the name of being one. Patriot showed up a few weeks before this and somehow had a title shot at the previous PPV which went nowhere. Naturally he “came within an eyelash” but that didn’t mean anything after that show.

Patriot has Angle’s old music which it’s just odd to hear in 1997. He’s more or less a heel here since he comes out with the American flag. Patriot says he wears a mask because he represents the face of every American. I don’t know that many men that have golden skin like that. Flash is wearing a freaking zoot suit. This isn’t as good of a match as it could be but it’s ok I guess.

It’s about as generic as you could get but that’s fine. Vince calls Flash the Funkmeister. I’m done. Patriot was just annoying as he never went anywhere. He wasn’t that good at all but was built up to be this great worker which he just wasn’t at all. They keep saying the reason they’re not being all violent and crap is because they don’t hate each other. That’s better than nothing I guess.

If nothing else this should tell you everything you need to know about Patriot: his finishers are a full nelson slam called the Uncle Slam and a top rope shoulder block called the Patriot Missile. Funk’s finisher is called the Funky Flash Splash. A full nelson slam ends this. That was a waste of time.

Rating: C-. Again, this was just there. It wasn’t particularly good or bad, but Patriot got some decent heat which is really all you can ask for. Funk went for a big move from the top and it missed for the Uncle Slam. That’s better than nothing I guess. It could have been a lot worse I guess, but this just wasn’t the best choice of a pairing.

In 1998 there was a quick cross promotional story with WWF and ECW that saw Flash go to ECW for a night at Living Dangerously 1998 against Rob Van Dam.

Rob Van Dam vs. 2 Cold Scorpio

Van Dam is still a huge heel here but it’s lightening up a lot. Scorpio is over at least. He’s Flash Funk at this point but here he’s just the simple 2 Cold Scorpio and therefore much better than he was in WWF. The more I hear the more I think Van Dam is already a face. They start with a long feeling out process which is fine as they do some decent technical stuff.

 

However, we of course get a botch because it’s ECW. Those things just suck the life out of a lot of matches. I understand that they are going to happen and at least here they covered it up a bit. In the previous match they just assumed no one noticed and thought it would be fine. That’s just freaking dumb. We get a very nice reversal sequence with a lot of monkey flips that ends with a standoff.

 

Very nice indeed. We hit the floor and Van Dam is in the crowd. Well you knew it was going to happen sooner or later I \guess. I think they’re going for the big epic match here but the fans aren’t all happy with it which can’t be a good sign. To be fair though, most of the time not all fans are going to love the thing. The fans want Sandman apparently. That sums up ECW crowds pretty well.

 

We’re given a high flying technically mostly sound match, and the fans want weapons and blood and tables. So many times these fans were just ridiculous and stupid and this is one of them. Scorpio hits a SWEET moonsault. The Five Star which isn’t called that yet gets knees or what are called knees I suppose as it looked like it hit pretty well to me. We hit the ramp for awhile and the Van Daminator is more or less no sold. Hint for how to counter: HIT HIM WITH THE CHAIR. Seriously dude, use some freaking intelligence.

 

A piledriver on the ramp and Van Dam is hurt. And there goes the referee because in a no DQ match we need a referee for…? Van Dam tries to steal the 450 and would have missed completely anyway. Scorpio mostly hits the 450 and here’s Sabu to up the workrate. An Arabian Facebuster gets two. Sandman comes out to chase off Sabu. Van Dam gets a SWEET jumping rollup for the pin. Post match Van Dam acts very cocky and offers a handshake but Scorpio nails him to a big pop.

 

Sabu comes back with a table so they try to put Scorpio through it. Naturally this doesn’t work as Sandman makes the save. In a stupid moment, as Scorpio is laying on it and Sandman makes the save, he pops up as soon as Sandman is here. Yeah that didn’t look dumb at all. Sandman tries a hurricanrana from the top through the table on Sabu. Guess what happens. Go ahead and guess. Anyway, the two faces share a beer after the match. Sandman dances. This is disturbing.

Rating: B-. This was good, but it suffers from the same problem that it always does: Paul Heyman overbooking it. Can ANYONE explain to me why Sabu and Sandman had to come in there? I know RVD and Sabu are partners, but he had no business coming to ringside at all. Just let him be Scorpio.

O Canada! From Breakdown 1998.

Too Much vs. Scorpio/Al Snow

 

Snow is completely insane and carries a mannequin head with him. Too Much is Brian Christopher and a newcomer named Scott Taylor. The fans get all over Too Much, sending Taylor into a fit before he starts with Scorpio. Feeling out process to start with Scorpio cranking on a wristlock before dropping him with a spinwheel kick. Taylor flips around and takes Scorpio down with a dropkick, only to have Scorpio in his face by the time Taylor nips up.

 

It’s off to Snow vs. Christopher with Snow hitting a bunch of headbutts to gain the early advantage. Things start to break down a bit with Scorpio bringing a chair into the ring but Snow uses it as a launching pad to dive at Taylor in the corner. Taylor falls face first into Christopher’s crotch to make the crowd wince. Christopher misses a charge at Snow on the floor and Scorpio hits a top rope splash on Taylor for two.

 

Snow moonsaults Christopher off the apron before heading back inside to slam Taylor. Scorpio goes up top but takes too long, allowing Brian to crotch him down to the floor. Taylor hits a nice springboard dive to take Scorpio down again. Things settle down with Too Much hitting a double backdrop on Scorpio but Christopher stops to dance.

 

Snow comes in sans tag with Head to clean house, only to hit Scorpio by mistake. The referee checks on Scorpio, allowing Al to hit Taylor low for a close two. The save is botched a bit with Christopher coming off the top late and the referee just stopping his count. Scorpio makes a save of his own (also a bit late) but Snow pops up and Snow Plows (scoop brainbuster) Taylor for the pin.

 

Rating: C. The ending was pretty messy but the rest of the match wasn’t bad at all. Scorpio had some incredible talent and Snow was one of the most underrated guys on the roster. Too Much would get far better when they stopped being goofy heels and became dancers. If nothing else it was probably better than the original idea for them: the first openly gay (and in love) tag team.

Scorpio left WWF soon after this and hit the indies. We’ll go from there down to as far south as you can get: perhaps the worst wrestling show ever. If you’ve never heard of this, save yourselves and run now. From Heroes of Wrestling.

2 Cold Scorpio vs. Julio Fantastico

Julio is more commonly known as Julio Dinero in case you’ve heard of him in ECW or old school TNA. Scorpio I’m sure you’ve heard of. If not, imagine a Godfather/Luchador combination. Yeah he was a weird one. Why is Julio on this show again? I have no idea either but whatever.

Why do these two and two tag teams have music but Steele and Valentine didn’t? Oh I guess it’s because they sucked. Scorpio is carrying a replica WCW Title belt. I know that because I see it, not because it’s mentioned or anything like that. This match might have potential to be something close to decent. Can’t you hear my enthusiasm in this show?

Lou Albano comes out for commentary for absolutely no apparent reason. I think he just wandered in here and needed a place to sit down. Albano, having no apparent power or anything, has the authority to give both announcers raises. You know, for the one night show, they’re getting raises for next week.

Albano babbles a lot but if you listen to him, he seems like he knows his stuff. Of course he does, but it’s so much rambling it’s hard to say. Can we just let him talk all night? He’s FAR more entertaining and interesting to listen to. He’s not bragging the whole time and he’s actually offering some insight and says that it’s a dropkick instead of a flying leg kick.

He then offers this and I had to listen at least three times to get all this. He says this about Randy: he’s a nice guy but he looks like he’s got the brain of a dehydrated baby if they put him in a pigeon pack and had him fly backwards. Ladies and gentlemen, this man was responsible for what became Wrestlemania. Apparently Lou looks like a pitbull in heat next to Dinero. This is making the show, hands down.

The match is very sloppy as Scorpio is having to carry this, but that’s the best choice I guess. There’s some decent stuff in there though but it’s just sloppy. We see Scorpio holding the ropes and pulling back for something but we go to a shot of Dinero and just see him being crashed on. Nice one guys. Scorpio’s hair is braided by the way.

Dinero isn’t bad at all actually and it was this match that got him a job with ECW of all things. In other words, Heyman or someone under him actually watched this and scouted talent from it. What does that tell you? Dinero takes a nice backdrop over the railing onto the floor.

They fight into the crowd and we can’t see crap because of the lighting and an annoying kid in a 49ers jersey. And the announcers point out that they don’t know what’s going on. Nice one guys. The referee sees a low blow and is fine with it of course. Dutch: we have a 2 count. The referee counted two. THANKS FOR THAT.

Albano gets on Randy for the leg kick thing again which is kind of amusing I guess. This needs to end like NOW. Dinero shoves the referee into the ropes to crotch Scorpio and that’s fine too.

Scorpio hits Trouble in Paradise which Dinero was going down from before it hit but whatever and a 2nd rope Tumbleweed (Harlem Hangover) hits then he goes up for a moonsault where he twists into another leg drop. He misses by a foot and a half, but that’s decent here.

Rating: D-. By FAR the best mach so far. This got something close to entertaining if you can believe that. The sloppiness just freaking kills it though as Scorpio just can’t do anything at all without botching it at all. There was something close to a decent match here though so that’s better than nothing.

It was back to ECW by the end of the year for a World Title shot on December 10, 1999’s ECW on TNN.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. 2 Cold Scorpio

Awesome (the champion) runs Scorpio over to start and Scorpio isn’t sure what to do. Scorpio knocks him to the ramp (the arena is strange as the aisle to the ring is on the level with the ring but the ring itself is in a kind of a pit) and hits a flip dive to take over, but back in the ring Awesome suplexes him to the floor. Scorpio is launched into the crowd and the champion dives over the barricade with a clothesline.

A chair to the back puts Scorpio back at ringside and a charge into the chair into Scorpio gets two back in the ring. Another tackle puts 2 Cold down and a clothesline knocks him inside out. This has been a total squash so far. Scorpio grabs a quick cradle for two and “hits” a superkick to set up a big top rope splash for two. A moonsault gets the same but Scorpio walks into a modified powerbomb for two.

Awesome hits a sweet release German suplex and it’s table time. It is ECW after all. Jazz, Scorpio’s manager, gets in and Scorpio has to save her from being powerbombed through the table. There’s another superkick to Awesome but Scorpio takes too much time to go up top and a HUGE powerbomb through the table kills 2 Cold dead to keep the title on Awesome.

Rating: C. I like both of these guys so I was a fan of this match before it started. This was when Scorpio was a shell of his old self when he was flying all over the place back in WCW in the early 90s. Good stuff here though as Awesome was moving around like Scorpio used to despite being bigger and taller than Scorpio ever was. Fun stuff.

Scorpio went to Japan for several years before coming back to America, mainly on reunion shows or on the independent circuit. Here’s one such appearance from the 15^th anniversary episode of Monday Night Raw.

15th Anniversary Battle Royal

THE FINK does the intros. We’ve got Al Snow, Bart Gunn (man, where did they drag him out of?), DOINK THE CLOWN, Repo Man, Steve Blackman (in far better shape than he ever was when he was a regular), Pete Gas of the Mean Street Posse, BOB FREAKING BACKLUND (58 years old here and looking to be in better shape than most of the roster), Gangrel, Goon, Skinner, IRS, Flash Funk, Scotty 2 Hotty, Jim Neidhart, Sgt. Slaughter and Gillberg, who gets a full entrance with guards and pyro sticks and canned chants. That’s AWESOME. This is supposed to be a 15 man battle royal but there are 16 in it. Eh who cares?

Gillberg is ganged up on and tossed immediately. Backlund is out quickly and the point of this isn’t who wins but is just for fun. A Head shot by Snow puts Doink out. Same for Gangrel. HEAD CHEESE EXPLODES!!! Skinner is called a fabulous one (haha) and there go Bart, Flash and Blackman. Repo Man puts Goon out and Skinner puts Repo out. Final Four are Slaughter, IRS, Skinner and Scotty. IRS gets his briefcase but gets it knocked into his face so we can see the Worm. Skinner puts Scotty out but walks into the Cobra Clutch. Slaughter dumps Skinner but IRS dumps Slaughter in the same ending from X7?s Gimmick Battle Royal.

BUT WAIT! Here’s Ted DiBiase, who is officially in the battle royal also. However, he says that IRS has his price so IRS dives over the top, making DiBiase the winner! And that my friends, is why Ted DiBiase is better than your favorite heel. We even get the evil laugh! The match isn’t worth rating because that’s not the point. The ending made me smile a lot though.

We’ll close it out with a win from a losing show: TNA’s Hardcore Justice, because why put on something original when you can put on an ECW reunion show?

CW Anderson vs. 2 Cold Scorpio

You know, because these two have SUCH a history together. They keep calling it the original era because they can’t say ECW, even though they do anyway. Oh this is wrestling. Just to be clear I guess. Amazingly enough, there’s next to nothing to talk about here. Scorpio was great in his time, but he was old in 99 and he’s very old now. This is kind of back and forth and really isn’t bad for the most part. Spinebuster gets two and the Tumbleweed ends it.

Rating: C-. This was actually ok. They had a nice back and forth thing going here with a solid clash of styles going. I liked Anderson to an extent and I always liked Scorpio so this worked well for me. Somehow I have a feeling this is going to be the best match of the night. This wasn’t bad at all though and has me in a better mood.

Scorpio is a guy that is remembered as being awesome but was more of a traveling attraction than anything else. He had some singles success in Japan and ECW but was mainly a tag team guy that made his partners look better most of the time. The stuff he was doing was insane back in 1992/3 and wouldn’t have been seen anywhere else in America. He’s a fun character and worth checking out if you’ve got the chance.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Summerslam at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00HY4NV7Y

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Today’s is a wrestler that is much more about the legacy than any individual accomplishments: Abdullah the Butcher.

Abdullah is a guy who took on an entirely different persona than he actually lived. Born in Canada, he took on the persona of a crazy man from the Sudan who never spoke in America and had handlers to do his talking for him. He never stuck around in one place for too long, meaning he was never going to win much more than a regional title. More often than not his story was that he was brought in by a big heel to take care of a big face, meaning this is going to be a different kind of look today. Basically I’ll just be looking at a handful of random matches from around the world, as Abdullah has been everywhere other than the WWF.

First up we’ll look at a match from World Championship Wrestling in the 1970s. Now a lot of you must be saying WCW didn’t exist in the 70s and if you only know of one WCW, you would be correct. This is World Championship Wrestling from Australia. I’m not sure on a date but the promotion closed in December 1978 so it’s before then at the latest.

Mark Lewin vs. Abdullah the Butcher

This is a called a war match so I’m assuming this is an old feud. Lewin is a guy most famous for his brawling so it should be a good fight. Butcher headbutts him into the corner and chokes away but Lewin comes back with some hard right hands to the head. More right hands knock the Butcher around before Lewin whips him into the corner over and over. Now it’s Butcher with right hands as this has been almost nothing but punches. Lewin grabs his sleeper finisher but has to dropkick Butcher’s handler Big Bad John. Butcher ducks a charging Lewin to send him into the ropes, tying his head in the cables for the eventual DQ.

Rating: D. This was exactly what it was supposed to be, though I’ve never heard of a war ending on a disqualifications. Lewin was a guy who was only going to work in the old system of wrestling. He wasn’t bad but it was all character instead of much to see in the ring, which was perfect for the 70s.

Post match King Curtis Iaukea (top star of the territory) comes out for the save but is sent into the buckle to put him down. Butcher goes after the referee but Iaukea gets up and fights Butcher off. Lewin declares the war is still on.

Now it’s off to Japan in 1982 for a match with a guy you may have heard of: Hulk Hogan.

Abdullah the Butcher vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan looks far less cut up here. He’s still big and muscular but there’s nowhere near the definition. A LOUD Hogan chant starts up but Butcher shoves him away. Hulk shoves him right back but no one goes anywhere off running shoulder blocks. A jumping knee is enough to send Butcher to the floor though as the crowd is way into this. We hit the bearhug from Hogan for a change and he lifts the 400lb Butcher up in a nice power display.

Butcher finally goes to the eyes to escape and sends Hogan outside with one shot. They brawl on the floor with Hogan taking over and putting on a sleeper back inside. A running clothesline puts Butcher down but Hulk’s splash hits legs. Not knees, but legs as Butcher doesn’t raise anything. Butcher goes to the forehead and you can see Hogan blade.

A fork shot to the cut has Hogan’s blood all over Abdullah’s ample stomach and he rolls to the floor. Back in and Butcher hits a brainbuster and the elbow for two but it’s time to Hulk Up (not yet perfected). Hogan punches him to the floor and they head into the crowd for a double countout.

Rating: D+. Eh it’s Hogan against a monster with a hot crowd so what else are you expecting? Butcher would have been great as a heel of the month against Hogan on the WWF house show circuit but he never came to the company. Hogan was his usual self here instead of being the different guy he normally was in Japan.

To avoid the scorn of certain commenters, here’s a match against Andre the Giant from Puerto Rico at the WWC’s first anniversary show on September 13, 1983.

Andre the Giant vs. Abdullah the Butcher

Andre easily knocks him out to the floor with ease before bringing him back inside for some HARD right hands and chops in the corner. The Butcher stops a “charging” Andre with an uppercut in the corner before headbutting him down to the mat. Choking ensues but Andre comes back with chops to the chest. Abduallah pulls something out of his pants and jabs Andre in the throat before they lay on each other in the corner. Andre gets tired of this fighting stuff and just goes off on the Butcher, knocking him out through the ropes and into the crowd for a double countout.

Rating: D-. The wrestling sucked but watching Andre beat on people is always worth seeing, especially when he could still move. It’s not a good match at all but the fans were into seeing the EVIL Butcher get what was coming to him from someone he couldn’t push around. More fun than good and there’s nothing wrong with that.

We’ll stay in Puerto Rico with an ultra rare Zeus match from the 1990 anniversary show on July 7, 1990. And yes, it’s that Zeus.

Zeus vs. Abdullah the Butcher

In case you’ve never heard of him, Zeus was an actor that was brought in as a monster heel against Hogan, only for everyone to realize that he’s an actor, meaning he can’t wrestle. It’s a brawl on the floor to start as the fans are INSANE for this match. Zeus mauls the Butcher on the floor before the bell and poses in the ring but that just warms Abdullah up. We go inside with Butcher, apparently a crowd favorite here, staring at Zeus as trash is thrown into the ring.

Zeus chokes away in the corner before putting on an awkward looking bearhug. Butcher gets pounded down in the corner as Zeus clearly can’t do more than one or two moves. Again, not his fault as he’s not a wrestler. The Butcher comes back with a shot to the throat but Zeus pounds away with left hands and chokes Abdullah into the corner. Abdullah won’t go down though and pulls out his trusty fork, only to have Zeus take it away and put on another bearhug.

Butcher finally remembers those Hulk Hogan tapes he watched and goes to the eyes to escape and Zeus is in big trouble. The elbow (signature move) only gets one on Zeus and it’s back to the choking. No one goes anywhere off some shoulder blocks so Zeus chokes some more. Butcher comes back with a single right hand to put Zeus on the mat and it’s off to a nerve hold.

Zeus glares his way out of the hold and monkey flips Abdullah (seriously) down for some more choking. A few kicks to the ribs put Zeus in more trouble and they slug it out some more. Butcher knocks Zeus outside but he puts on a bearhug from the apron. They head outside and Zeus blasts him with a wooden podium as we get a double countout.

Rating: C. That rating only works if you look at it as ANYTHING other than a wrestling match. This was a spectacle instead of a match and that’s the best way it could have worked. Zeus wasn’t a wrestler and couldn’t do much more than bearhugs and chokes but you can’t hold that against him. Incredibly fun stuff here.

We’ll close things out with one of only three matches from Butcher’s most famous run in America. It’s the Chamber of Horrors match at Halloween Havoc 1991, which is a huge team match but when else am I going to get to talk about this?

Cactus Jack/Abdullah The Butcher/Diamond Studd/Big Van Vader vs. Steiner Brothers/El Gignate/Sting

Oh boy it’s the Chamber of Horrors. Now if you’ve never heard of this, clear some room off your list of absurd gimmicks. This is inside a cage similar to the Cell, although there’s no top on it and the holes in the cage are bigger. Inside are coffins, skeletons and a few weapons. The idea of the match is that everyone is fighting at once and at some point during the match, an electric chair will lower from the ceiling. Someone must be placed in the chair, strapped down and someone from the other team has to throw a switch, “electrocuting” them. And somehow, it’ll be even dumber than it sounds.

Oh and Gigante is replacing the injured Windham and Cactus is replacing Oz, although Oz will be in a match later and apparently Oz replaced Jack in that match. No idea why they made the switch. Jack comes out with a chainsaw minus the chain. Sting is US Champion here and yes, this is really what they’re using him for. Cactus jumps Sting on the ramp and Abdullah helps, but Rick comes out for the save. This is before we’re even in the cage. Well Rick was but he left because it’s just a cage so why should it be hard to stay inside?

In the ring Scott kills the Studd with a Tiger Driver while Gigante fights Vader. Sting gets a kendo stick to pound away on everyone he sees. Well everyone that isn’t on his team that is. Or the referee either. Speaking of the referee, he has a camera on his head here which is really more annoying than anything else. That could be an interesting idea for an angle but it never went anywhere.

People in masks pop out of those caskets. They don’t do anything but they pop out anyway. Sting clotheslines Vader to the floor and Gigante pulls Studd off of the cage wall. The Steiners hit their top rope DDT on Cactus as the chair is lowered. Vader knocks Rick into the chair but Rick clotheslines his way out of it. Sting throws a casket lid up in the air so it lands on Cactus’ head.

Now we have ghouls coming out with a stretcher. Again they don’t do anything but they’re there. Scott shatters a kendo stick over Cactus’ head, breaking him open. Cactus and Sting climb the cage and ram each other into it, which is one of the few actual clear brawls in the match. The rest of it is too hard to call because of the awful camera work. Sting has the stick now and stabs Hall with it.

It’s pretty much impossible to call this match as everything is all over the place and it’s just random brawling. Sting is busted open, as is Abdullah. Cactus goes for the switch as Rick is put in the chair, but the future Freakzilla makes the save. The heels get Rick into the chair for a second but he fights out of it pretty quickly. He gets put in there again and Cactus goes for the switch. Steiner suplexes Abdullah into the chair instead and after Cactus takes FOREVER to stand next to the switch, he throws the lever and Abdullah gets “electrocuted.”

Rating: W. As in wow, what were they smoking, or why. You can pick whichever you like and I think it’ll be fine. This was a huge mess but to me, this is pure nostalgia. I haven’t seen this match in years but I still remember about 80% of the commentary word for word. The match is terrible and incredibly stupid but it’s a fond memory for me so I can’t hate it.

Cactus checks on Abdullah post match but the Butcher gets up and beats up the ghouls that brought out the stretcher earlier.

Abdullah the Butcher is one of those guys that doesn’t have a definitive history because he was the traveling attraction of the old days. As I said, he never was around in one place all that much and if it was he was little more than a bigger villain’s hired goon. He’s a guy who lived off his reputation and there’s nothing wrong with that at all.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of In Your House at Amazon for just $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00GV3KXSE

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Royal Rumble 2000
Date: January 23, 2000
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 19,231
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

After sitting through 1998 and 1999, this is my reward. What we have here might be the best Rumble show of them all with one of the best matches ever and a great Rumble on top of it. 2000 is the best in ring year the company ever had and this was a great way to kick that year off. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Cactus Jack challenging HHH for the world title in a street fight. This is that “one of the best matches ever” that I was talking about. The idea is simple: Cactus wants the title back and he’s facing HHH in a street fight, which means HHH is in WAY over his head. We’re in Foley’s hometown in Foley’s match with Foley’s most hardcore character. How can this not be a masterpiece?

Kurt Angle vs. ???

Angle is undefeated at this point. Kurt says he’s a real winner here, unlike the New York Knicks. This is goofy Kurt, which means he’s hilarious. He says that the mystery opponent must be scared to come face him, but the opponent needs to take a deep breath, come out here, and face Angle like a man. The self-help thing here is hilarious. The fans chant WE WANT TAZ….and here he is!

Kurt Angle vs. Tazz

Tazz pounds away on Angle and hits a HUGE backdrop to send him to the floor. Angle escapes a suplex in the aisle (painted like a street with a big cab hanging above the entrance, which looks like an alley. It’s really cool) and takes over. Back in and Kurt hits a forearm for two and chokes away in the corner. A belly to belly puts Tazz down but Angle goes up and gets crotched. Tazz hits a super Tazplex for two before getting rolled up for two. Angle gets two more off a bridging German before walking into a release German from Tazz. We unleash the suplexes on Kurt before the Tazmission ends Angle’s undefeated streak.

Rating: C+. This was short, but to say it was an effective debut is an understatement. The place ERUPTED when Tazz won which is exactly the point of the opening match. See, this is what you call LISTENING to the audience. WWF knew they had to appeal to the ECW fans and what better way than to have Tazz debut here? Today, Tazz would be in some comedy match and would likely lose, because Heaven forbid that the fans get what they want in one city for one night.

Angle does a stretcher job.

We go to the Hardys in the back and get a clip of them and the Dudleys putting each other through tables. Terri, the Hardys’ manager here, is told to stay in the back. She would be gone from the team soon, thank goodness.

Tazz says Angle is just the first victim.

Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz

I believe match #1 or #2 in a series of roughly 8000 and it’s an elimination tables match. Bubba praises John Rocker of the Braves who had recently gone on a massive anti-New York rant in Sports Illustrated. The Hardys hit the ring and the match starts fast with Bubba hitting the Bubba Bomb on Jeff. No tags here thank goodness. Bubba sets up a table in the ring but before he can get another one, Jeff takes him out with a HUGE flip dive.

Jeff gets sent into the steps as Matt escapes a powerbomb through the table. D-Von suplexes Matt as Jeff CRACKS Bubba in the head with a chair. In a SICK spot, Jeff tries to run the railing but Bubba throws the table at Jeff, knocking him out of the air. That sounded GREAT. The pairings trade off and Bubba loads up the backsplash through the table, only for Jeff to come back and try a double superplex. D-Von moves the table but doesn’t stop the suplex.

Matt brings in a ladder because this might as well be a TLC style match. We head to the floor where the ladder is set up in front of a table with Bubba on it. Matt dives through Bubba through the table just as Jeff dives in from off camera with a splash, sending Bubba through the table in another awesome looking spot. So it’s 2-1 now with Jeff leaning a table up against the barricade. The steps are set up on their end and a table is set up like a bridge between the steps and the apron.

D-Von is placed on the bridged table but moves before Matt dives through him. He moves AGAIN to avoid a diving Jeff, sending him through the leaning table. Cool sequence there by Ninja D-Von. Apparently Bubba doesn’t have to leave. Ok that makes things more interesting. The Dudleys set up two steps in the ring and put a table across them before hitting a HUGE powerbomb on Matt to eliminate (in a sense) him. The tables are LOUD tonight too. Jeff gets beaten into the aisle but Matt quickly follows, only to get WHACKED in the head with a chair.

The Dudleys stack up four tables in front of the entrance (it’s the MSG setup where the entrance is opposite the cameras). Matt gets put on the tables and Jeff is CRACKED in the head again to break up the save attempt. Bubba climbs onto the taxi over the aisle to splash Matt, but remember that wouldn’t win the match. Jeff climbs up after him (I’m not sure where D-Von went) and blasts him with a chair, knocking him through two of the tables (still doesn’t win). Matt puts D-Von on the table and Jeff dives off the taxi with the Swanton through D-Von through the table for the win.

Rating: B+. This was AWESOME with all four guys being young and hungry here. The Dudleys were out to prove themselves and the Hardys were out to show they could hang in a fight. They had already proven they could fight in a violent match like the ladder match, but this was a brawl instead of a high flying match. REALLY fun stuff here though and well worth a look if you haven’t seen it. The Dudleys would get the titles next month, setting up the first triangle ladder match at Mania.

Angle gets a concussion test and complains that being choked out is illegal.

It’s time for the Miss Rumble Bikini contest with Sgt. Slaughter, Tony Garea, Moolah, Johnny V, FREDDY FREAKING BLASSIE and Andy Richter from Late Night with Conan O’Brien as judges. Jerry gets to emcee of course. The contestants are Ivory, Terri, Kat, Jackie, BB (You shouldn’t remember her) and Luna. The idea here is that Kat legitimately took her top off (full exposure too, the only intentional female nudity in WWF history) at Armageddon and more nudity was promised here.

Ivory doesn’t want to do it but eventually does. Terri does her usual skin colored one which we’ve seen before. Lawler freaks out over her bending over the ropes. Jackie…no one cares. BB isn’t bad but again, the whole point of this is for Kat to win. Luna won’t show. Kat is in a bikini made of bubble wrap. Creative if nothing else. The judges start tallying their scores but here’s Mae Young to enter as well. She takes off her robe, and THERE is the nudity (it was fake). Mae wins to complete the joke. Lawler’s reaction of “OH MY GOD I SAW THEM” is priceless. Mark Henry comes in to save our collective retinas.

The recently hired Coach doesn’t have much to say from WWF New York.

Chyna and Jericho, the co-IC Champions, argue over who gets to wear the belt to the ring. There was a double pin in a title match and they became co-champions as a result, which is a pretty creative idea.

Angle says he’s still undefeated. Rock would pin him on Smackdown a few weeks later.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Chyna vs. Hardcore Holly

You know Jericho is fired up to be in MSG. He talks about how awesome his championship celebration will be, as it will make the millennium celebration look like his sister’s seventh birthday party. Holly piefaces Chyna down to start before getting in a slap fight with Jericho. Chyna gets sent to the floor for the Slaughter fall, leaving the blondes to fight for a bit. Holly hits that perfect dropkick of his but Jericho comes back with the forearm.

They slug it out until Holly tries a rana (huh?), only to get caught in the Walls. Chyna makes the save, basically turning heel at the same time. Chyna sends Holly to the floor and gets drilled by Jericho. Holly and Chyna go to the floor where Jericho tries a dive but slips and only hits Holly. Back in and there’s the handspring elbow and DDT from Chyna to the Canadian for two. Everyone heads to the floor where Jericho saves Chyna from a chair shot. Back in and both champions go up for a kind of double splash for two.

They both tried for a cover and a fight breaks out as a result. Chyna escapes a belly to back suplex and hits Jericho low, followed by a Pedigree for two on Holly. Chyna goes up but gets caught in a modified Doomsday Device (cross body instead of a clothesline) for a very close two. That probably should have been the finish. Now Jericho loads up a superplex but gets crotched for his efforts. Holly gets superplexed by Chyna but gets two on her off the bounce. Chyna chairs Holly in the head and puts on the Walls, only to have Jericho break it up and hit the Lionsault for the undisputed title and a BIG pop.

Rating: C+. This was pretty good and too short to get bad. It could have been on Raw but see, back in 2000, there was this crazy idea of finishing angles on PPV. I know that’s insane now and everything ends in a big match on Raw or rather just stops happening one day, but back in the old days, they ended like this. Match was fine.

Rock is worried about two and only two men in the Rumble: Crash Holly and Headbanger Mosh. Cole (minus facial hair) suggests maybe Rock should be worried about, say, Big Show. Rock says go make a glass of shut up juice (not one of his better catchphrases) and tells Big Show he doesn’t care what he thinks. He guarantees to win the Rumble right here in New York City and the place eats it up. I want one of those jerseys he’s wearing.

Jericho says he said he’d win and he’ll lead the Jerichoholics like a pied piper.

Tag Titles: Acolytes vs. New Age Outlaws

The Outlaws are defending and there’s a backstory that doesn’t deserve to be listed. Who would have thought that THIRTEEN YEARS LATER the Outlaws would be on house shows for the WWE again? The Outlaws are heels here but they’re over like free beer in a frat house here in New York. The APA storms the ring and the beating is on quickly. Bradshaw and Billy officially get us started with Billy taking a fast beating. Both guys tag as the referee is adjusting his ear piece.

Faarooq imitates Dogg’s dance before getting double teamed a bit. Bradshaw breaks up the shaky knee drop and everything breaks down. The Clothesline kills Billy and there’s the spinebuster to Roadie….but Billy pulls the referee out. The ref is bumped and Road Dogg is hit with a double powerbomb. X-Pac runs in and kicks Bradshaw’s head off. The Fameasser to the future JBL retains the titles in like two and a half minutes. This had to be cut for time. The Outlaws would lose the titles to the Dudleys next month and that would be the end of the team.

Dogg rhymes about keeping the titles.

We recap HHH vs. Cactus Jack. HHH won the title the night after Summerslam from Mankind via cheating. Big Show got the title at Survivor Series but lost it back to HHH in January. Mankind stood up to the newly formed McMahon-Helmsley Era and got beaten down for his efforts. Foley got fired and we had a fake Mankind get humiliated. Rock then said that every single wrestler would walk out and form the Rock Wrestling Federation if Foley wasn’t rehired. See how different storylines could be back then? Mankind got HHH to agree to a street fight at the Rumble but got beaten up for his efforts.

This led to an AWESOME promo on Smackdown, where Mankind said he wasn’t ready to face HHH in a street fight, but he knew someone who did. He took off his mask and ripped open his shirt to reveal Cactus Jack, scaring HHH to death. These two, as in Cactus Jack and HHH, had fought in 1997 in the match that basically brought hardcore to the WWF and they did it in MSG, with Cactus winning clean. This was an excellent story and there was a VERY real feeling that Cactus could pull this off, because HHH was in WAY over his head. Check out the build to this match as it’s some of the best stuff you’ll EVER see.

WWF World Title: Cactus Jack vs. HHH

Street fight. It should also be noted that Foley lost about 30 pounds inside of a month and a half and is by far the slimmest you’ll ever see him look here. HHH does the long slow walk to the ring which makes things feel even more epic. Stephanie heads to the back which is probably a good thing. Dang I miss that big title. It’s SO much better looking than the stupid spinner version. Even now when it doesn’t spin it doesn’t look like something special but rather something like a toy. The belt on HHH looks classy.

Cactus looks like and animal and HHH looks terrified. Jack wins a quick slugout and pounds HHH down into the corner. We head to the floor for a swinging neckbreaker on HHH and a legdrop onto the apron knocks the Game back to the floor. HHH is rammed into various metal objects but comes back with a bell shot to take over. NOW we get to the fun part as the first chair is brought in.

Back in and Jack charges right into a chair shot like an idiot. Granted for him, that’s playing the character right. HHH goes to unhook the buckle instead of covering for some reason and Jack pops up to clothesline the champ down. There’s a legdrop onto a chair onto HHH’s head for two and we head outside again. HHH gets backdropped into the crowd and the beating begins again. JR: “They’re out in the sea of humanity.” Jerry: “Humanity? JR we’re in New York.”

HHH gets rammed into something made of metal that we can’t see and they head into the aisle. Cactus sets up a wooden pallet and suplexes HHH onto it before screaming in his face. This isn’t falls count anywhere mind you. There’s a trashcan to the head and HHH gets rammed into the steel doors. The fans chant for Foley as he gets suplexed onto the trashcan. The crowd is just RUTHLESS against HHH here as they head back to the ring. The aisle is really short so it’s not a long walk.

Jack rams a knee into HHH’s head to drive it into the steps and it’s back inside now. This is almost all Jack so far. There’s the 2×4 in barbed wire but HHH hits him low to get the board away. Some shots to Cactus’ ribs and back have him in trouble and HHH looks at the board as if to say “did I just do that?” Cactus blocks a shot to the head and hits HHH in the balls with the board. The double arm DDT puts HHH down as the referee takes the board out of the ring, drawing the loudest booing of the ngiht.

Cactus wants the board back and beats up the Spanish announce team who the board was left with. He gets a board (clearly not the same one but that’s likely for safety reasons) and after the referee is crushed, HHH gets hit in the forehead with the wire. The board is driven into HHH’s forehead and he’s busted something fierce now. The referee is back up now and we get the most famous spot of the match with Jack ripping the wire across HHH’s cut to make him scream.

Cactus tries to piledrive HHH through the announce table (same thing he won the 97 match with) but HHH counters with a backdrop. JR: “The champion is bleeding like a horse.” When does a horse bleed? HHH is bleeding from his leg which is a rare sight to see. The place LOUDLY cheers for Foley and we head back inside. The Pedigree is countered into a slingshot into the post and a bulldog on the wire gets two.

HHH has a spot called to him about the steps before the Cactus Clothesline takes them both to the floor. Cactus charges but gets hiptossed into the steps, banging his knee in the process. You know a Flair disciple like HHH knows how to work on a knee. Back inside and HHH clips him down before picking up the barbed wire for another shot to the knee. HHH pulls out some handcuffs in a flashback to last year.

Cactus fights back and hits HHH in the head with the cuffs in a smart move. The cuffs are locked up a few seconds later though and HHH starts pounding away. The steps are brought in but Foley comes out of nowhere with a drop toehold to send HHH face first into the steel. A low blow keeps HHH down and Cactus bites away. HHH gets back up and grabs a chair which he literally BREAKS over the back of Cactus. They head outside again and Cactus takes some shots to the head from the chair.

Cactus says hit me again but before HHH can crush the skull, Rock pops out of nowhere and blasts HHH in the head with a chair of his own. A cop comes in and unlocks the cuffs, freeing Cactus. HHH starts backpedaling fast but gets caught on the Spanish Announce Table. The piledriver hits this time but the table DOESN’T BREAK.

We haven’t gotten violent enough yet, so here’s a bag of thumbtacks. Stephanie comes out (complete with snakeskin choker in a nod to Cactus) and HHH comes back with a backdrop onto the tacks. There’s the Pedigree but Cactus kicks out at two to blow the roof off the place. It doesn’t last long though as a Pedigree ONTO THE TACKS finally ends Cactus.

Overall Rating: A+. FREAKING OW MAN! If there’s a match that made a guy into a legitimate force better than this one made HHH, I’d love to see it. This was an absolute war with both guys destroying each other for about 27 minutes. The place never gave up on Foley and it’s easily one of his best matches ever. This is one of the best brawls ever and yet again it’s well worth checking out.

HHH is taken out on a stretcher but Cactus pulls him back into the arena. There’s a barbed wire shot to the head and the place cheers like crazy for Mick some more.

Linda is at WWF New York to talk about HHH’s title reign. Wait no she’s not. She would NEVER be involved with something involving bloodshed. And Stephanie is oh so precious and does SO much work for charity don’t you know.

Royal Rumble

The intervals are “two minutes or less” according to the Fink. We get a quick look at Shawn’s miracle save in 95 which would play a role in the coming weeks. D’Lo Brown is #1 and Grandmaster Sexay is #2. Feeling out process to start with Sexay countering Brown’s running powerbomb into a rana. A middle rope missile dropkick puts Brown down and Mosh, complete with cones on his chest, is #3.

Kai En Tai, two guys ticked off about not being in the Rumble, runs in and are immediately thrown out. Nothing else happens for a minute or so until Christian (with his AWESOME solo theme called Blood Brother. Look it up) is #4. Nothing happens again so here’s Rikishi to a POP at #5. Mosh, Christian and Brown are quickly dispatched, leaving Grandmaster and Rikishi.

Scotty 2 Hotty is #6 to complete the trio…..and it’s time to DANCE! The place absolutely loses it over this until Rikishi clotheslines and eliminates them both. Note that it is NOT a heel turn and just business, which Too Cool is ok with. Rikishi dances a bit more on his own and the place is still erupting.

The company took notice of those eruptions too, and the three of them wound up feuding with the Radicalz for the next four months or so, resulting in Too Cool getting the tag titles and Rikishi getting the IC Title. In other words, they were given a stupid gimmick, got it over, and were rewarded. Today, you get to lose the US Title to Jack Swagger and become a jobber to the stars if you get yourselves over. As I typed that, Steve Blackman came in at #7 and was eliminated.

Viscera is #8 and you know New York loves itself a fat boy battle. Big Visc rams into him a few times but misses a charge and three straight superkicks put him him. Big Boss Man is #9 and won’t get in, drawing some good heel heat. He stays out on the floor until Test is #10. Test pounds away on Boss Man to finally get all three guys in there. Boss Man hits Test low but Rikishi hits Test low to put both guys down.

British Bulldog is #11 as things slow down a bit. There’s a low blow for Rikishi as well and Bulldog tries to get him out until Gangrel is #12. Kai En Tai comes out again and Taka is thrown over the top into a 360, landing face first on the floor. FREAKING OW MAN. This would be played multiple times over the rest of the match, much to Lawler’s amusement. Edge (starting to mean something and over in New York) is #13.

Boss Man takes a Banzai Drop and Bob freaking Backlund is #14. He comes out to Hail to the Chief as he’s legitimately running for Congress in Connecticut at this point. You would think that would have been a tip for Linda’s future but alas no. Everyone goes after Rikishi and dumps him out to get us to the second part of the match. To recap, we’ve got Boss Man, Bulldog, Test, Gangrel, Backlund and Edge in there at the moment. Jericho is #15 to his third or fourth big pop of the night.

Jericho goes right for Edge in a match that would be for the world title eventually. That doesn’t last long though as Jericho dumps Backlund, who yells at some fans before leaving. Actually he goes into the crowd to look for Connecticut registered voters. For a guy as bland as he was back in the day, Crazy Backlund is one of the best performances I’ve ever seen.

Crash is #16 and gets a double spanking from Edge and Bulldog. Ok then. Edge is sent to the apron by Bulldog so he punches the British Boy in the balls. Chyna is #17 in the far less remembered Rumble appearance. She goes right for Jericho and suplexes him out in about 30 seconds but gets knocked out by Boss Man almost immediately. Faarooq is #18 and here’s the Mean Street Posse who is also out of the Rumble. Those three and Kai En Tai were all thrown out of the Rumble on Heat so five more guys could be added in.

Anyway Faarooq is quickly dumped and Road Dogg is #19. The crowd does his entrance for him but he runs right into a low blow. The fans want Puppies, a term Road Dogg invented. Crash survives an elimination and Al Snow is #20. Roadie throws out the Bulldog and Val Venis is #21. Funaki runs in on his own and is thrown out almost immediately again. Prince Albert (Tensai) is #22 and there goes Edge.

The ring is getting too full now with Boss Man, Test, Gangrel, Crash, Road Dogg, Snow, Venis and Albert. Dogg continues his strategy: hide in the corner and wrap all four limbs around the bottom rope. I’ve heard worse ideas. Hardcore Holly is #23 and we’re getting down to almost only big names left. Crash gets knocked to the apron but gets back in AGAIN.

Now we get to the final part of the match as The Rock is #24 to bring everyone to their feet. Boss Man is the first victim, being eliminated by a spit punch. Venis and Test double team him but Rock hangs on in the corner. He beats up Hardcore for a bit as Billy Gunn is #25. He goes right for Rocky but since no one believes Billy Gunn is going to eliminate Rock, the Great One throws out Crash to give himself something to do instead. Dogg has shifted over to another corner now.

Big Show, Rock’s opponent for this match, is #26. Rocky pounds on him immediately but Albert sticks his fat head in Rock’s business. Show dumps Gangrel and Test before going to stomp on Rocky. Bradshaw is #27 and is out in about 30 seconds at the hands of the Outlaws and the Mean Street Posse. Kane is #28 complete with the still sexy Tori. Venis gets thrown out almost immediately and Show stupidly gorilla presses Gunn down instead of out. Kane knocks Albert out as Godfather is #29. The Ho’s are especially good looking tonight.

Funaki comes out for the fourth time. JR: “For the love of Pete.” Jerry: “No that’s Funaki.” X-Pac is #30 which was announced in advance. The final group is Road Dogg, Al Snow, Hardcore Holly, Rock, Gunn, Show, Kane, Godfather and X-Pac. Snow dumps Holly and Show puts Godfather out. Rock dumps Snow to get us to six. Billy dumps a talking too much Roadie just before getting dumped by Show.

We’ve got X-Pac, Kane, Big Show and Rock as the final four. I’ve seen far worse. Rock throws out X-Pac but the referee is with Kane who is fighting the Outlaws on the floor. Pac gets back in and the guys pair off. Show sends Rock into Kane for a big boot as the giants choke each other. Pac kicks Rock down and Kane hits a pretty good enziguri and an even better slam on Big Show. Pac kicks Kane out and a Bronco Buster on Big Show.

Rock dumps X-Pac and we’re down to two. The spinebuster sets up the Elbow but since IT’S JUST A FREAKING ELBOW DROP, Show gets up and chokeslams Rock down. Show takes WAY too much time though and Rock holds onto the top rope, sending Big Show out to go to Wrestlemania. Awesome ending to an awesome match.

Rating: A. AWESOME Rumble here with the absolute right ending. This was the Rock’s Rumble and there was no other person who should have won it. The only part that was a little dull here was the middle but it’s certainly not bad. This followed the three part structure as all great Rumbles do and as usual, it worked like a charm. Great Rumble and one that might have a claim to best ever.

Rock says he’s going to Wrestlemania when Big Show comes in and knocks him to the floor. Show stands in the ring as Rock leaves to end the show.

Overall Rating: A+. This is one of the best shows the WWF has ever put on. Period. There isn’t a bad match on the whole card, the crowd is ON FIRE all night and you have two excellent matches to round out the show. I can’t imagine anything in the next 12 years surpassing this one and I can’t recommend it highly enough. Outstanding show.

Ratings Comparison

Tazz vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A-

Redo: C+

Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: A

Redo: B+

Chris Jericho vs. Chyna vs. Hardcore Holly

Original: C

Redo: C+

New Age Outlaws vs. Acolytes

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

HHH vs. Cactus Jack

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Royal Rumble

Original: A-

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: A

Still great and still the best Rumble ever.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/19/royal-rumble-count-up-2000-match-of-the-decade-maybe-yeah/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of In Your House at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

November to Remember 1995
Date: November 18, 1995
Location: ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 1,150
Commentator: Joey Styles

 

People whose opinions I respect have told me that this is the greatest ECW show of all time. With that information in mind I figured I had to take a look at it at least once. This is the last ECW show I’m going to do for a good while because I’m more or less out of ones I can do. The main event is a tag match with Raven/Cactus Jack facing Dreamer/Funk. Other than that it’s a big bunch of stuff but from what I understand it’s the whole package rather than a single match that makes this great. Let’s get to it.

 

Keep in mind that this is more or less ECW’s Wrestlemania.

 

Joey gives us a quick rundown of the card. This is the home video version so that makes some more sense this time.

 

Broad Street Bully vs. Don E. Allen

 

Bubba Ray Dudley is guest ring announcer for no apparent reason. The Dudleys hadn’t united yet so this is when it’s still the goofy stable. Bubba is in overalls and a top hat with a white jacket. D-Von would come in soon and get rid of Chubby, Dances With and Dudley (all with the last name Dudley) to make himself and Bubba the killers that they’re known as. They’re faces here though or at least Bubba is.

 

Bubba has a really bad stutter so him managing to get the title of the show out is considered remarkable. Actually scratch that as he’s gotten rid of the stutter….and there it is again before he can infringe on copyrighted material such as “let’s get ready to rumble.” Hearing Joey have sympathy Bubba is just weird. Big Dick gets mad at him so Bubba says screw this and beats up Allen. HUGE powerbomb puts him down so the Bully tries to jump Bubba. Bubba hammers him down and powerbombs him also, then pins him for no apparent reason. By the way the regular ring announcer is Joel Gertner.

 

Heyman comes out and calls for the lights to be dimmed. They come back on and SABU is back. Huge ovation for him and a bigger one for when he shakes hands with Heyman. He had been in WCW for a cup of coffee and that went nowhere so here he is back where the people love him.

 

Jason Knight vs. Konnan

 

Joey does the ring announcing for this for some reason. Knight is more famous as the Jason that hangs out with Justin Credible a few years after this. Yes he actually was a wrestler for awhile. Konnan is billed from AAA in Mexico. I need to do When Worlds Collide someday. Konnan is still masked here. The guest referee is Taz, who is still not healed from his neck injury so he can’t wrestle tonight.

 

He had been Tazmaniac for his entire run up to that point so this was a repackaging for him. Taz says tells you he can’t wrestle due to the doctors and ECW not clearing him to wrestle. Jason cuts him off and we see why Jason rarely talked. Taz says Jason has Konnan to deal with so Taz says ring the bell, decks Jason and lets Konnan hit a crucifix bomb to end this in like 10 seconds. Taz will be back later.

 

El Puerto Ricano vs. Stevie Richards

 

Richards is a goofy putz (Joey’s words) here and is Raven’s (top heel here) lackey. Richards gets a gift from the unnamed Blue Meanie who comes over the guardrail with a shirt that says Blue Meanie. The gift is a Flock of Seagulls half shirt. The non Clueless Putz (never did anything of note) jumps Richards and we’re off.

 

Ricano hits a missile dropkick and dives on Meanie to take care of him. He goes up too many times though and Richards slams him down to take over. Flock of Seagulls dude hits a powerbomb and the other guy (you type Ricano over and over again) is in trouble. He gets draped over the top and takes another Stevie Bomb. Blue Meanie comes in and misses a moonsault. Richards hits a superkick to end this. More or less just a squash.

 

Eliminators vs. Pitbulls

 

I haven’t seen a lot of the Pitbulls but they were very popular and pretty successful in ECW so this could be worth seeing. Francine in leather isn’t a bad thing to see as she manages them so this should be good. Oh and Jason manages the Eliminators. It’s weird to see Saturn with hair. The Pitbulls are known as #1 and #2. #1 has hair. Got it. He and Saturn start us off and the Pitbull (Gary Wolfe. #2 is Anthony Durante) shrugs off most of Saturn’s offense.

 

He tosses Perry into the corner and slams him. The idea of the Pitbulls were they were more or less Rhyno in leather and more athletic. Blind tag brings in Durante who gets a top rope elbow for two. Off to the other Eliminator John Kronus to face #2. Big power match here as Kronus hits a release Dragon suplex to take over. The Eliminators, the more athletic team, speeds things up a lot to take over.

 

An assisted moonsault takes out Durante but an elbow clearly misses. Thankfully Joey covers and says he moved, otherwise it would have looked awful. The fans are behind the Pitbulls as Kronus picks #2 up off a belly to back suplex. Kronus gets caught between the Pitbulls but Durante misses a splash in the corner and crashes to the floor. He’s bleeding from the elbow now.

 

Kronus is a lot fatter than I remember him being. Saturn comes in with that sweet high elbow drop of his (OH YEAH from Joey) but it only gets two. Saturn hits a corner rana which also gets two somehow. The Eliminators are a pretty new team so this is kind of their showcase match. Saturn tries to set up something on the ropes but a superbomb by Durante gets no cover.

 

Everything breaks down and Jason hits a legdrop on #2 to keep him down. Double tag brings in Kronus and Wolfe who cleans house. Double clothesline takes the Eliminators down and it’s a big brawl. Wolfe totally misses a spinwheel kick in the corner but Kronus sells it anyway. Double superbomb out of the corner ends Kronus and we’re done.

 

Rating: B-. This was a rather fun match. The botches make it a bit amateurish looking but at the same time this wasn’t exactly Gagne vs. Thesz out there. They would feud forever with the Pitbulls eventually losing their edge. Pretty good match though and the fans were into it the whole way (duh) so I can’t complain much here at all.

 

Post match Jason jumps Francine and tries to kiss her (Joey: “HE LIKES WOMEN!”) and as the Pitbulls go for the save the Eliminators beat them down and hit Total Elimination on both guys.

 

Psicosis vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

 

This is a Mexican Death Match, meaning more or less last man standing but you need a pin before the count begins. This was a long running feud and I think this is the blowoff match. The fans chant Rudo at Psicosis. Rey of course gets a Tecnico chant and comes out to what sounds like Sad But True by Metallica. Yep that’s what it is. Not what I think of when I think of Rey. The big match intros are done in both languages.

 

This is when Rey was still like the fastest guys in the world and Psicosis is able to keep up with him so I’m not even going to try to call play by play on this. Even Joey can barely do it and he could double as an auctioneer. Rey gets a quick pin off a top rope rana but Psicosis is just mad and not really hurt. Out to the floor we go and Rey falls when trying to jump onto the railing. That clip is on the Rise and Fall of ECW I believe.

 

Back in the ring a missile dropkick puts Rey down and a moonsault gets a pin. The count is unimportant at this point because we’re only like three minutes into this. Rey gets draped across the buckle as this is one sided at the moment. How weird is it to see Psicosis as the far bigger and stronger guy? Powerbomb gets the pin but Rey is up 1. They’re counting backwards so he barely beat the count.

 

Psicosis goes to get a chair but changes his mind and is booed out of the building. A buckle bomb keeps Rey down. Twisting senton (flip into a backsplash) gets another pin but that’s fine because Rey is up at 1 again. Dropkick puts him right back down and the fans are literally standing. Now it’s chair time and Rey takes a DDT onto it. He beats on Rey then puts the chair on Rey’s back for a moonsault to get his fourth pin in a row.

 

Rey barely beats the count so Psicosis goes for the possibly injured knee (from the botch earlier) which is rather smart strategy. Psicosis tries a moonsault but Rey pulls the chair into the way and takes over. Springboard clothesline sends Psicosis to the floor. High cross body and we’re in the crowd for a second. HUGE moonsault (Asai hadn’t been named yet I don’t think) and Rey takes over with some chair shots.

 

Psicosis tries to run into the crowd and you can’t see them but Rey brings them back and they’re at ringside again. Never mind as we’re going back into the fans. Psicosis is more or less running as Rey is on fire. They’re right below Joey (who is in what’s called The Eagle’s Nest) so Rey hits him with a chair, climbs up the Eagle’s Nest and dives off with a HUGE hurricanrana and Psicosis is dead and we’re done.

 

Rating: B. Pretty awesome stuff here as Rey played possum after the beating and then woke up to massacre Psicosis and become just too much for him. Rey was only 20 at this point so he was a total rookie phenom. Total war here and the psychology actually existed. Rey would be in WCW in about 7 months.

 

Jason comes out to talk to Rey and offers to manage him. Rey says no so Jason threatens him. Take a guess how that goes. The Eliminators come out to destroy Rey but 911 (more or less the security guard who is about 7’0 and 400lbs) comes in for the save and easily dominates the Eliminators. Rey gets on his shoulders and the fans seem pleased.

 

Tag Titles: 2 Cold Scorpio/Sandman vs. Public Enemy

 

Woman manages Scorpio and Sandman who are champions (along with Scorpio being TV Champion) and come out to Whomp There It Is. Whoever gets the fall here faces Mikey Whipwreck later in the show for the world title. Woman is kind of hot actually. She could look rather good at times. Scorpio dances a lot while we’re waiting on the Public Enemy to get here.

 

I have no idea what the face/heel alignment is here but I think Public Enemy is face. According to Gertner the TV Title is on the line here also. Yeah apparently Sandman and Scorpio are the heels here. Sandman is billed from…..Utah? Seriously? Scorpio is doing a thing where he says he doesn’t weigh as much as he really does. He does have a gut on him.

 

Public Enemy is leaving soon after this for ECW apparently. Scorpio offers them a chance to leave so let’s have a dance off. Uh…..ok? Scorpio cuts a rug and Joey dances too. The camera catches him and his reaction is great. Rocco does a robot which isn’t horrible. Scorpio does one also and destroys him. And now we set dancing back about a thousand years with Sandman dancing too. Joey: “Yes but can he walk a straight line?” They want Woman to dance and it’s very short. Crowd is WAY into this.

 

The champs jump the dancing morons but Public Enemy clears the ring quickly. AND IT’S TIME TO DANCE! The music is still playing as I think we have a comedy match on our hands. Just a hunch mind you. Ok so now we’re ready to go with Sandman vs. Grunge. Sandy grabs a headlock but is sent to the floor. Everything breaks down quickly and they all head to the floor.

 

Everyone grabs a chair and gets back in the ring for a good old fashioned duel. Sandman and Grunge are thrown to the floor and Scorpio follows. They fight up the aisle and a fan offers 2 Cold a frying pan. He steals someone’s prosthetic hand instead. Well why not? Sandman goes into the crowd and Grunge is busted open. He hits a splash for two on Scorpio as we’re bordering on having a regular match.

 

Rocco hits Sandman with a pumpkin pie and Sandy is in the crowd again. Woman pulls Sandman out of the crowd. Sandman tags himself in and he jumps over the top (!!!) with something like a dropkick. Rocco comes in and hits a headscissors to take over. Slingshot legdrop by Sandman but he doesn’t cover.

 

Off to Scorpio who hits a slingshot splash for two. Scorpio vs. Rock at the moment if you’re all lost. Rock avoids a dropkick and escapes a tilt-a-whirl, only to miss a moonsault. The fans chant for SD Jones for some reason as Scorpio hits a double underhook powerbomb which is broken up at two.

 

Standing moonsault eats knees and it’s off to Sandman. Rocco (they’re Rocco Rock and Johnny Grunge if you’re totally confused by me changing named) still can’t bring in Grunge so Grunge comes in and pounds on Sandman. Woman cracks Rocco with a kendo stick and Sandman dives over the top to take out Grunge. Sandman gets backdropped onto a table which doesn’t break. FREAKING OW MAN.

 

Grunge finally goes through the table and everything breaks down even further. Rock hits a big moonsault to the floor as they need to end this soon. A broom handle is brought in from somewhere with Scorpio taking over with it. There it goes though so 2 Cold settles for a Stinger Splash and moonsault for two on Rocco. We’re tagging again now and Grunge gets the hot tag. Sandman comes in sans tag but Public Enemy screws up their finisher and Sandman falls on top for the pin.

 

Rating: D. Yeah this went too long. These guys aren’t the ones you want having seventeen minutes. This was better as a comedy match but then again I might have just wanted to see Woman dance. Either way, not much here and Sandman getting the pin was pretty much the only logical choice since he lost the title to Mikey in the first place.

 

Sandman is out but Scorpio pours beer down his throat. And it’s time to dance again. SCORPIO DROPS THE BEER! Sandman catches it and the look on his face is priceless.

 

On the actual card Axl Rotten beat JT Smith here but it was a dark match.

 

We recap Commissioner Tod Gordon vs. Fonzie, a referee. Shane Douglas lost the world title to Sandman and said he wanted a better referee in the form of Fonzie who would call matches right down the line. This of course made him by far and away the biggest heel in the company almost by default (not kidding).

 

Fonzie punched Gordon when Gordon yelled at him so 911 gave Fonzie one of the biggest chokeslams you’ll ever see (LONG story there but it was some of the most brilliant storytelling you’ll ever see. In short the move was banned but Fonzie had to unban it so someone could use it. 911 immediately hit the ring to kill Fonzie with it and blow the roof off the place). Fonzie also got in a fight with Beaulah who is the referee tonight.

 

Bill Alphonso vs. Tod Gordon

 

Beaulah is referee and I really want to know what Dreamer did in a past life to get her. He must have invented beer or something. Remember neither of them are wrestlers so this is only going to be so good. Gordon jumps him and they fight by Sign Guy and Hat Guy. Beulah slaps Gordon so he clotheslines her. Tod (Commissioner) Gordon (HOLY NON WRESTLER BATMAN!) comes in and Joey is losing it.

 

Tod takes him down and says let’s fight. Not sure why he needed to grab a mic to say that but whatever. Gordon takes off his jacket and wins a slugout. This isn’t a match for the most part but they’re trying. Fonzie gets a low blow and says he’s going to beat Gordon up. Joey: “It’s not over yet you rat faced excuse for a human being!” And remember: this is because Fonzie is a GOOD referee.

 

Fonzie takes the time to talk to the camera and Gordon gets a WICKED cooking sheet shot to the head. After he gets hit, Fonzie starts jabbing himself in the head and what do you know he’s bleeding from there. Gordon is shockingly passable here. Gordon finds a frying pan but Fonzie gets it, only to take a low blow. Joey is absolutely losing it over this. Frying pan to the head but Beaulah is still down from like five minutes ago.

 

And now for the important part of the night. Taz runs out to be referee since he was earlier in the night and counts two for Gordon, only to stop and deck Gordon then put Fonzie on top for the pin. To say Taz is instantly hated is like saying Cena was hated against Punk at MITB.

 

Rating: A+. Ok now keep something in mind here: this is a legit businessman vs. a referee. All things considered, THIS WAS AWESOME. They were beating the tar out of each other and it had the fans going nuts, even by ECW standards. Not a thing wrong here and the whole thing worked. Considering who was out there, great stuff.

 

Taz wants to talk. This is probably the most important part of the entire show. The fans chant for Sabu and Taz says he’s not coming out. Taz talks about how he got no cards, no letters or phone call. When Dreamer hurt his fingers everyone cried and freaked. Same with Funk. When Sabu got his neck broken, everyone was worried about him. What about Taz?

 

Fonzie shouts into the camera that Taz is his guy. Taz says screw the fans and screw Heyman. Heyman said take your time to get back. Quote: “Screw you Heyman. My father ain’t some fat Jew lawyer that pays my way through life.” Taz says Fonzie cares about him and wants to put food on his table and money in his pocket. Gordon is still out cold on the mat. Taz says since no one cares about the two of them, they don’t care about the fans.

 

Taz stops for a bit and Joey talks about how stunned he is to see Taz finally sell out. Fans are trying to rush the ring. Taz lays on his back and says bring it. This whole thing was Taz’s epic heel turn which would result in him beating basically everyone on the roster for the next year, almost always in a squash while he begged Sabu to come out and fight him. That wouldn’t happen for a year and a half, resulting in one of the main events at their first PPV, Barely Legal. Mad heat on him here and a great heel turn.

 

ECW World Title: Sandman vs. Mikey Whipwreck

 

Sandman is making his entrance (through the entrance) but is jumped by some guy with long blonde hair who is making his in ring debut tonight, taking Sandman’s place to challenge for the title.

 

ECW World Title: Mikey Whipwreck vs. Steve Austin

 

Yes, THAT Steve Austin. He had cut some promos but this is his first of I think two matches in ECW before he signed with WWF. He drinks Sandman’s beer while Sandman is taken out. There was a line at some point in ECW (not this show) where Joey asked if you could imagine Steve Austin drinking beer and flipping people off on Monday Night Raw. Not really connected here but Sandman takes awhile to get taken out.

 

The idea behind Whipwreck is that he won the title on a fluke after being a total jobber for years. Austin says his debut is the thing to remember. He’s sounding like Stone Cold here rather than Stunning Steve so this is where he really got his start, at least with that character. Austin says that for tonight, Whipwreck is Eric Bischoff to him. Joey: “KILL HIM! Wait I didn’t mean that!”

 

Steve jumps him to start and the beating begins. Mikey has had no offense at all as Austin mauls him. He beats on him on the floor then in the ring and back on the floor again. Mark this date down: THE ECW ARENA IS CHANTING HOGAN. It’s to tick Austin off but it happened! Just because he’s Austin, he hits a big boot and drops a leg for two.

 

Mikey has had no offense at all. He reverses a whip on the floor though and Austin doesn’t seem to mind. Mikey hammers away but walks into a Stun Gun (Austin’s finisher at the time) but it only gets two. Mikey grabs a sunset flip out of nowhere (complete with the tights coming down) for the SHOCK pin to retain.

 

Rating: C. You can barely call this a match but it did what it was supposed to do. Whipwreck keeps the title (for some reason) but Austin losing is the important part. It resulted in him losing his mind and being all crazy, which apparently was what caught WWF’s eye and got him his job, which ultimately saved Vince’s company.

 

Hack Meyers vs. Sabu

 

Meyers is more or less just a biker. You know this might have been a better surprise if he hadn’t come out earlier. Sabu works on the knee of all things to start and messes up a snapmare (Meyers landed on him). Time for a chinlock. FEEL THE EXTREME! It’s chair time and a slingshot dive in with the chair gets two. We go to an armbar and the fans are calling it boring.

 

Springboard leg lariat gets two and we hit the chinlock again. Meyers makes a comeback and hits a powerslam for two. A weird facebuster off the top which is Hack’s finisher gets two. They go to the floor quickly but Sabu drops a leg for two. Meyers wins a slugout but Sabu goes onto Meyers’ shoulders and gets a DDT to take him down. Spinning leg lariat puts Meyers outside and Sabu hits a diving rana to the floor.

 

After a bit more brawling on the floor we go back in but Sabu dives into a powerbomb. Release suplex put Sabu down but Meyers goes up and gets caught in a victory roll off the top for two. This is going WAY too long for a big return over a glorified jobber. Meyers goes up but gets dropped on a chair. Sabu hits a rana to put them on the floor AGAIN. Sabu sets up a table and dives over the top through it, half killing Meyers. That only gets two in the ring so Sabu slams him and the Atomic Arabian Facebuster (flipping double legdrop with a chair in between) ends this FINALLY.

 

Rating: D. See, when a superstar like Sabu returns, it should be total dominance. This mostly was, but the fact that it took so long made Sabu look kind of weak. Not his worst stuff, but at the same time it just went way too long at about 13:00. Heyman would manage Sabu for awhile until we got to his match with Taz.

 

Sabu acknowledges Meyers for his efforts.

 

Terry Funk/Tommy Dreamer vs. Raven/Cactus Jack

 

Main event time. Funk is “planning on retiring”. That’s just amusing. Funk says he’ll remember what happened with Cactus last night forever. Apparently it was a big attack on Terry but Dreamer made the save. This is a revenge match for Funk and Dreamer always hates Raven Cactus is in a WCW Dungeon of Doom t-shirt. He was in a WEIRD (yet awesome) heel push where he longed to be back in WCW with “Uncle Eric”.

 

The pairings pair off and Raven and Jack rule the ring for the moment. Now we get to the brawl and Funk fights Raven. Stevie Richards brings in some weapons and gets put in a shopping cart for his troubles. Dreamer BLASTS Raven in the head with a freaking VCR. WHY WOULD YOU BRING ONE OF THOSE TO A WRESTLING SHOW??? In a funny bit, Dreamer hits him with the remote also.

 

Funk beats up the referee because he’s Terry Funk. Dreamer DDTs the referee for good measure. Funk hits Raven with a golf club in the putter. Cheese grater is broken up and Cactus drills Dreamer with a chair. Dreamer gets taken down by a double chain shot to the throat. Raven is busted open and poses anyway. Cactus channels his inner Abdullah as he jabs at Funk with a fork.

 

DDT to Dreamer as Raven and Cactus are dominating. They try the chain again but Dreamer does something smart and dives on it, bringing them together. Not that it matters as Cactus takes him down with ease. Cactus takes the Dungeon of Doom shirt to reveal another one with a huge picture of Eric Bischoff and the words “Forgive Me Uncle Eric” (coining that nickname) on the back. Only Mick Foley could make that work, period.

 

It’s more or less a big mess but were you really expecting something else here? Jack hits a double arm DDT on Funk onto the chair but there’s no referee. Raven dives over the top to take out Dreamer and Jack looks for more weapons. Here are Fonzie and Taz to be referees but Funk kicks out at two. Taz beats up Funk so Dreamer takes Taz out. Jumping DDT takes Raven down and for some reason a regular one does more damage. The referee is back up and Dreamer piledrives Raven onto a chair, letting Funk steal the pin.

 

Rating: B-. Pretty fun match overall as they kept things just weapons based instead of going everywhere. Also Jack having the continuing mental breakdowns in the middle of the match (the Uncle Eric thing) is great. Dreamer not beating Funk is one of those little things that makes a match better. Fun stuff here and one of the better brawls ECW did.

 

Cactus beats them down a bit but gets taken down too. DREAMER SUPERKICKS RICHARDS! Ok so it was in the ribs but still! Raven leaves Dreamer laying to end the show.

 

Overall Rating: B+. I can see why people would call this ECW’s best show ever. It likely is and it’s very good for the most part. Keeping in mind that this was 1995 and WCW was running stuff with monster trucks and mummies while WWF had King Mabel as top heel, this was a very different kind of show. They did their thing and let guys like Foley and Austin do their things, knowing what they had to work with. Very fun show but some of the stuff is a bit odd. Granted it wouldn’t have been for ECW fans so that takes some of it away I guess. Worth seeing though.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Halloween Havoc 1993
Date: October 24, 1993
Location: Lakefront Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Jesse Ventura

This is a show I’ve kind of wanted to get to for the main event alone. This is the blowoff to Vader vs. Cactus Jack with the main event being non-title. For once that’s fine though as it shouldn’t be for the title as it’s about revenge. Also tonight it’s Flair vs. Rude II for the International Title. If it’s as bad as last month’s I’m not sure what I’ll do. Let’s get to it.

The opening video here is a bunch of kids trick or treating and one has an idea. One wants to go home because it’s time for Halloween Havoc to start. They go to a big scary house and find something terrifying inside: Tony Schiavone. If Halloween Havoc is about to start, shouldn’t he be at an arena?

One of the kids asks him just that and he says he has a helicopter. He says his wife is baking cookies and asks if the kids would like them. This is supposed to be a vampire thing I think and it turns into a promo for the Spin the Wheel Make the Deal main event. Tony pulls his face off to reveal a monster and we open the show.

Tony is dressed as Jesse and Jesse is dressed as a gynecologist. That’s rather amusing. Tony says he wasn’t in that house and it was Jesse dressed as a monster dressed as Tony. Ok then.

Ice Train/Charlie Norris/Shockmaster vs. Harlem Heat/Equalizer

Harlem Heat are known as Kane and Kole (Stevie and Booker respectively) and are by far the most talented guys in there. The face team (listed first) is perhaps the least talented group of three men ever assembled and that covers a lot. Shockmaster is the guy that fell over, Ice Train is a big muscular black guy and Norris is an Indian. Equalizer is not very good.

Ice Train and Stevie start us off. 2 Cold Scorpio and Marcus Bagwell are tag champions apparently. Train runs through him but surprisingly enough there’s no tag. Train can more or less do nothing at all. Off to Stevie now and Norris as well. Stevie gets his arm worked on as I’m bored already. Shocky comes in to a pop for no apparent reason. He drops some legs on the arm as we hear about his agility. Oh dear.

Harlem Heat use nefarious means to take down Ice Train as I guess he’s the face in peril. Still no Equalizer at this point. Oh great here he comes. That’s EXACTLY what I wanted to see. This is of course incredibly boring and the most interesting thing we hear is that Yoshi Kwan has been replaced by Paul Orndorff in his match with Ricky Steamboat.

Shockmaster, called Uncle Fred here, comes in to beat up Equalizer. The fans chant whoomp there it is to tick me off. Norris in now but down he goes anyway. END THIS PLEASE!!! Booker misses a splash and it’s off to Shockmaster. He locks a bearhug on Booker and falls on him for the pin to THANKFULLY end this.

Rating: F+. Do I need to explain to you why this was terrible? Other than Booker T, Tugboat was the best worker in the entire match. Absolutely terrible, FAR too long at nearly 10 minutes and absolutely nothing special in the slightest about it. At least it’s over though.

Terry Taylor is the second referee for Rude vs. Flair. Does this PPV hate me or something?

Paul Orndorff vs. Ricky Steamboat

Well he’s better than Kwan I guess. Orndorff has the Assassin, an old masked wrestler and Nick Patrick’s papa, with him for no apparent reason. The fans immediately start the Paula chant. Orndorff jumps him to start and takes the early command. I can’t stand Orndorff but this has to be better. Steamboat gets a rollup for two but gets his head taken off shortly thereafter.

We hit the floor as this is just barely interesting at this point. They fight on the ramp for a bit with Steamboat taking a WEAK slam. We stay out there way too long and Patrick finally yells at Paul about it. Steamboat finally gets something going by hooking the arm of Orndorff as he jumps and it’s off to an armbar. This needs to like, get going very soon here.

Jesse accusing the referee of jive talking. There’s something hilarious about that. Cross body by Steamboat gets two and it’s back to the arm. Steamboat sends Orndorff into the post which isn’t a DQ because it wasn’t head first. Somehow Orndorff is allowed to stay outside for like two minutes at a time. Steamboat goes back to the armbar and rips on the fingers this time.

Steamboat is all fired up here and Orndorff is hiding from him. Back to the floor where Orndorff rams Steamboat’s head into the apron and then dumps him into the crowd. Both try cross bodies back in the ring so we stop some more. Sunset flip gets two for Steamboat and we head outside AGAIN. This is beyond stupid at this point.

Back in the ring and a top rope chop gets two. Piledriver is reversed and it’s a pinfall reversal sequence. Slingshot into the corner sends Orndorff into the steel. The Steamboat Cross Body hits but the Assassin has the referee. The delay makes it get two. After some more near falls Orndorff sends him to the floor. With the referee distracted, Orndorff loads up his mask and rams his head into the back of Steamboat’s and it’s a freaking countout after nearly 20 minutes of dull.

Rating: D-. This is one of those matches that went on forever and then at the end we got nowhere. Probably 8 minutes of this was them laying around or in an armbar or being on the floor. Who in the world thought this was a good idea? We can’t have a clean ending here on a PPV? This was boring but the ending drags it way down.

The WCW International Board of Directors are saying that the International Title is considered a world title, so yes WCW did the two world titles first.

TV Title: Davey Boy Smith vs. Steven Regal

Ok, this has to be better right? This is pre-drugs Regal and therefore awesome. There’s a fifteen minute time limit so they might as well brand TIME LIMIT DRAW on the middle of the mat. BIG pop for Smith. That TV Title is the design that would become the Cruiserweight Title.

They walk around a lot and Regal complains about the oil on Smith. Smith almost breakdances and winds up in control of the wristlock. Regal takes over it and they kill some time. Smith cartwheels to escape some hold by Regal. This is another match with no apparent point other than to have a match. We’re about four minutes into this and nothing of note at all has happened yet.

Cravate by Regal wastes some more time. Surfboard by Smith takes about 30 seconds to set up. Sir William, the manage of Regal, tries to interfere and it makes Bulldog drop the hold. It allows Regal to take over as the crowd isn’t exactly thrilled with this match to say the least. Knee to the ribs gets two. He hooks a modified chinlock to waste more time.

Bulldog gets a sunset flip for two as this is reaching that level of boring again. We hit ten minutes with Regal holding onto Bulldog. This basically amounts to Bulldog on the mat and Regal laying on him. Four minutes left. Bulldog tries a comeback but Regal gets a knee to the ribs to stop that. Off to another chinlock which lasts awhile as we hit three minutes. Tony thinks we’re putting this into the deep freeze. You can’t buy insight like this people!

Bulldog gets him up onto his shoulders but Regal nails Smith in the ribs to drop him again. Back to ANOTHER chinlock as we’re at two minutes now. Jesse and Tony have an ethics debate (Jesse is against them) as Bulldog puts Regal on the ramp for no apparent reason. Regal takes him down one more time as this needs to end. Smith nips up and starts his comeback with a minute to go. What are the odds of that? Regal kicks out of the powerslam like it’s nothing and a Piledriver gets two at the bell so it’s a tie and Regal keeps the belt.

Rating: D. Well it was a little bit better than the other matches but it’s another nonsense finish. They’ve had one regular finish tonight and that was in the terrible six man match. This is perhaps the worst opening hour to a PPV I’ve ever seen. Actually wait. It’s not bad. It’s just insanely boring. This had DRAW written all over it from the second Bulldog’s music hit and everyone knew it.

The main event is a Texas Deathmatch which they clearly rigged the wheel for THANK GOODNESS after the fiasco last year.

United States Title: Steve Austin vs. Dustin Rhodes

These two feuded for what seemed like forever. Dustin got the title in what was supposed to be a #1 contenders tournament but the champion, Rude, was injured so it became a title tournament. The Hollywood Blonds are still together but would be split very soon. Dustin of course, looks like an idiot because he wants to be a cowboy like his papa. Jesse flat out says it makes him look like a gay caballero.

The bell rings and the fans get a bit quieter. Austin slaps Dustin to start and they go into the corner. Dustin returns the slap and we hit the floor. Back in and Austin can’t get a Boston Crab. They tease a test of strength which goes nowhere. Austin drills him with a right hand to take over. Hmm he’s being rude to fans, wearing black, his hair is getting shorter and his name is Stunning. Nah there’s nothing there, at least according to Eric Bischoff.

Off to a headlock by Austin as they’re just past the feeling out process here. I’m starting to think that the boring style here is more a thing of WCW in general rather than the matches themselves. Into the corner now where Austin keeps control with chops. He tries a running knee into the corner but misses and hits the floor with a possibly bad knee. Austin with knee trouble? Nah.

Dustin, thinking for once, goes after the knee. Yep let’s do that for a few minutes now. The cameraman gets bored so we go to a wide shot as apparently researchers are looking up the rules for a gimmick match. This raises a bunch of questions. First of all, where do you look it up? Is there a Big Book O Gimmicks? Second, WCW has a research staff? And yet Charlie Norris, the Shockmaster and the Equalizer made it to TV? Finally, they didn’t know the rules when they put it on the wheel? What if it was an “everyone in the company loses their jobs match” according to the Big Book O Gimmicks? I could go on but I think you get the point.

Austin may hit Dustin low as he instantly takes over after a punch to the alleged stomach. Dustin goes back to the knee but Austin takes him down with ease again. Now we’re wasting some more time until Dustin hammers away with punches. Backdrop has Austin in trouble. Dustin calls for the bulldog but he gets crotched as a result. As Goldust he’d enjoy that methinks.

With Dustin sitting on the corner he got crotched on, Austin knocks him backwards into a Tree of Woe. Hey, Austin and Dustin only have one letter different in their name. Obviously the A did better than the D, thereby proving that letter grades are better than stars. Stun Gun is blocked and they go into a short pinfall reversal sequence for nothing but deuces.

Austin sets for a spinebuster but more or less drops him. He throws his feet on the ropes and gets the pin but Nick Patrick stops the celebration and says keep going. Dustin rolls him up for the quick pin despite Austin’s shoulders being up. Austin clocks him with the belt and leaves with the belt post match. He would win it at Starrcade before losing it to Jim Duggan of all people in like 30 seconds.

Rating: C. Well it’s the best match of the night so far but it’s still pretty bad. Austin and Dustin would have a much better 2/3 falls match at Starrcade but this was just not that good. You could see the star in Austin but he was held back by general idiocy for far too long. Anyway, decent match here but the show’s life has been sucked out of it long ago so there’s not much that’s going to save it and an ok match isn’t going to start the process at all.

Tag Titles: 2 Cold Scorpio/Marcus Bagwell vs. Nasty Boys

The random team won the tag titles “last night” (really like three weeks ago) as a surprise. Again the problems with the long TV tapings show up as everyone knew the titles were changing back tonight. Teddy Long manages Bagwell and Scorpio. Bagwell can’t dance, like at all. Bagwell has been either a rookie or in his second year for like 19 years now. Hearing Buffer say “The Diss That Don’t Miss” is disturbing.

Big brawl to start with the champions sending the Nasties to the floor. Bagwell kisses Missy Hyatt just because he can. That was apparently before the bell meaning we get MORE NASTY BOYS BABY!!! Sags goes off on Bagwell to start and apparently Bagwell is surprised. They fought them last night. How surprised can he be? Bagwell fights both guys off and Scorpio hits a top rope cross body to take both Nasties out and the challengers hit the floor again.

Another dive by Bagwell as we have even more time with them staring at each other. Off to Scorpio and Knobbs now with Scorpio getting a sunset flip for two. Double shoulderblock by the champions get two as this has been totally one sided other than some punches by Sags. Thesz Press gets two for Bagwell on Knobbs. Sags comes in and gets knocked around a bit too. Lots of double team moves get two on Sags. Off to an armbar by Scorpio now.

Back off to Bagwell and the arm work continues. Sags finally remembers that he’s in a famous tag team and shoves Bagwell into the corner and double teaming by the heels ensues. Out on the floor Missy slaps the TAR out of Bagwell. Bagwell is back dropped out there and casually says Oh My God while holding his back. Slam gets two. Off to the old favorite of a chinlock by Knobbs but it’s back to Sags very soon.

Sags spits on Bagwell who takes him down as a result. Knobbs, the illegal man, covers him for two after no tag and the referee is fine with it. Gotta love refereeing skills! Bearhug goes on to kill some more time. Marcus tries to fight out but a right hand stops him pretty easily. There’s my favorite move as the referee misses the tag to Scorpio but three seconds later the real tag happens anyway.

Scorpio comes in and cleans house with punches and dropkicks. Splash in the corner to Knobbs and he wants the Tumbleweed. Sags accidentally drops an elbow on Sags and the managers get up on the apron. In the ring there’s the 450 to Knobbs but Sags drills 2 Cold and puts Knobbs on top for the pin to win the titles back. Riveting.

Rating: C-. Well the ending was pretty fast paced but the 13 and a half minutes to get there more or less bored the heck out of me. I don’t know who thought it was a good idea to keep giving the Nasties double digits worth of time but it happened for about a year and a half. This was a boring match with a good ending and sadly enough the ending has been the best part of the show so far.

Sid and Colonel Parker (when did THAT partnership happen?) say that Sid is the Franchise of WCW. This next match is basically to determine who the big shot in the company is. Guess who wins.

Sting vs. Sid Vicious

Sid hammers him down to start with raw power. A clothesline by Sting puts Sid on the apron and a suplex brings him back in. To the floor we go and they fight into the crowd. This is all happening in maybe the first minute or so. Back to ringside with Sting totally in control. Top rope clothesline puts Sid down for two.

Parker grabs Sting’s foot and Sid is able to chokeslam Sting down. Now Sid stops to pose. Well no one ever accused Sid of being smart. He pounds away, mainly using very, very slow offense. Sid keeps grabbing Sting by the throat and shoving him around with relative ease. He adds some stomps as Sting really shouldn’t be in much trouble or pain at this point.

Parker cheats a bit and nothing really comes of it. More stomps as Sid hasn’t gone for anything resembling a kill. Side slam by Sid but no cover of course so Parker chokes a bit more. Sting goes after the Colonel on the floor so Sid goes after him, adding a chair shot so weak that I actually thought the video was in slow motion. Sid drapes him across the railing as this is so slow it’s pitiful.

Off to a chinlock now as I guess that was too much wrestling for Sid’s tastes. The fans chant for either guy as Sting fights up. He walks into a powerslam for two though and it’s off to a bearhug now. Sting gets out of it so we go right back to it. Again he escapes and avoids a big boot before hammering away on Sid. Two Stinger Splashes put Sid down and Parker is dropped for a bit. Parker accidentally grabs Sid’s foot for two. Sting rolls up Sid to thankfully end this.

Rating: D-. Oh this was bad. Sid’s combined time on offense might have added up to three moves that would have done significant damage. This went nowhere at all and was more or less a glorified workout for Sting. Sid would turn face soon after but nearly murder Arn Anderson and end his world title push. Terrible match with Sid doing barely anything at all. You know what this was like? It was like when you see wrestlers on a mainstream TV show and they do the bare bones of moves to try to make it look like a match before the ending. That’s what this was like but on a PPV match.

Vader is warming up.

Cactus seems to be….praying? He keeps saying you can’t hurt Cactus Jack.

WCW International World Title: Ric Flair vs. Rick Rude

Flair has his French maid Fifi with him. Remember that Terry Taylor is the second referee for no apparent reason at all. The big match intros waste some time. Flair gets a bunch of pyro when he’s already in the ring. Jesse: “All that for the challenger?” This is an actual world title so yes, Rude was a world champion. Taylor is on the floor for this so you can write Dusty Finish on this already.

Flair hammers away to start and gives us a WOO. Clothesline in the corner puts Rude down as it’s been all Flair so far. Granted we’re maybe 90 seconds into this. Rude gets a knee up in the corner but misses one off the top. Figure Four attempt works almost immediately and Rude is in trouble. This draws a WHOMP THERE IT IS chant for no apparent reason other than these are some stupid, stupid people.

Rude FINALLY makes the ropes and the hold is broken. Flair wraps his leg around the post as Jesse wonders why Taylor doesn’t stop it. Totally valid question which Tony of course brushes off. Flair works the knee more and Jesse says that he and Tony should wave since they’re on camera. Jesse is hilarious at times he really is.

Flair is sent to the floor to break the hold he had on Rude. He busts out a sunset flip but Rude kneels into it and grabs the ropes which Taylor slaps away so Flair gets two. Rude is knocked to the floor again as this has been one sided. Flair drops a forearm on Rude from the top rope to the floor. When do you ever see that? I guess this is post Bill Watts era. He tries it again but since it already worked once in the year it doesn’t a second time as Rude gets a fist in.

Rude tries to get a chair shot in but Taylor breaks that up. Jesse says Rude is the young one. Flair was old and this is eighteen and a half years ago. Chinlock by Rude which he lets go to gyrate for Fifi. Rude goes up and drops a forearm on Flair’s head for two. The knee injury from earlier slowed up his cover in some nice continuity. Back to the chinlock (reverse chinlock like a camel clutch here).

Flair is sent to the ramp and takes out a cameraman which is always fun to see. Suplex back in gets no cover. Rude goes up and hits the forearm/fist/strike from the top rope. Again why mess with the basics if they work? They chop it out and I think you know who wins that. Rude takes him down with a clothesline for two though and we hit the bearhug. He drops to his knees in this hold for some reason. He gets some covers out of it so I guess that was the idea.

They slug it out for a bit and Flair locks in a sleeper which is broken in seconds. Maybe it wasn’t locked in. Rude goes up a third time but Flair avoids it. Rude Awakening by Flair gets two. Backslide gets two for the challenger. Taylor is the in ring referee now for no apparent reason at all. Flair comes off the top but jumps into the boot of Rude in the dumbest spot in wrestling.

Ok now Anderson is in the ring as referee again. Flair wakes up and goes off on Rude in the corner but Rude gets a weak clothesline. Down goes Anderson so now Taylor should be the in ring referee. Rude hits him by mistake and pulls out the foreign object that won him the title last month. Flair takes him down and gets the object, hitting Rude with it. He drills Rude (no pin for no apparent reason at all) but the outside referee saw it and yes you guessed it IT’S A DUSTY FINISH with Rude keeping the title.

Rating: D+. Well the match itself was boring but then the ending made it even worse. This went twenty minutes and we get a Dusty Finish. Is anything actually going to happen on this show? Like I said another boring match but I’m rating it higher out of pity at this point. Terrible ending and a weak match to set it up means this isn’t anything to talk about.

Rude tries to take Fifi but gets dropped and put in the Figure Four on the ramp.

We go over the rules for a Texas Deathmatch (I guess we found the Big Book O Gimmicks). Here’s the idea: it’s kind of like a Last Man Standing match but not quite. You fight and you go for pins which count anywhere in the building. Then there’s a 30 second rest period (stupid) and THEN the guy that got pinned has ten seconds to get up, meaning you have 40 seconds to get up in theory. Dude, did ANYONE edit the Big Book O Gimmicks?

Vader vs. Cactus Jack

I’m not going through the whole angle again but in short they started fighting in April, Vader injured Jack, Jack is here for revenge. Vader is world champion but this is about revenge and not the title. Jack is just mad over here. He was second to probably only Flair and Sting (arguably only Sting) in popularity at this point.

They go straight to the floor and the fight is on. I remember last year in the WZ Tournament IC said that there was one person that could take Vader in a hardcore match and that was Cactus Jack. This is the proof. Vader misses a punch and hits the post so Jack goes right after it. Chair is brought in but Vader just punches Jack in the head. Cactus is like BRING IT ON and bites Vader.

HARD chair shot to the head of Vader and the champion is in trouble. They actually go into the ring but Vader gets a boot up and drills Cactus with a clothesline. Vader just mauls him in the corner and Cactus is reeling. Out to the ramp goes Jack but he avoids a suplex back into the ring. Somehow he manages to suplex Vader in a rather rare display of strength. Jack is busted open but hits another suplex on the ramp, this time a belly to back variety.

No attempts at covers yet as this has been a major brawl. Race tries to interfere with a chair and gets dropped with ease. Another chair shot to Vader and they go into the graveyard set. They go into a grave with a headstone marked RIP Vader. For some reason there are steps into it which Cactus comes out of. His eye looks AWFUL. Vader comes out of his own grave and is busted open too. There’s a Thriller joke in there somewhere.

A shot with something gets a pin on Vader. Now Vader has 30 seconds to rest and THEN he has to get up. That’s just stupid. Only WCW could take a brutal war and make it this idiotic. Cactus grabs a cactus and drills Vader with it as Vader was up at two. Why is there a cactus in a graveyard in Louisiana? Cactus drops the elbow off the ramp and gets a fall with that. After the resting (some DEATHmatch) Vader is up before two.

Vader wakes up and drills Cactus who fights right back. A table (an actual one and not the WWE style) is set up in the corner. Vader is thrown into it and bounces off which just gets two. Cactus drills him with the table (again doesn’t break. See what I mean?) to knock him to the floor. Cactus tries a sunset flip to the floor which misses so Vader tries to sit on him which fails.

Jack drapes him over the railing and just beats on him. Total war the entire time so far. Into the crowd now and Vader more or less backdrops Cactus into the ringside area again. Chair to the back of Cactus as Harley has a freaking tazer. Vader slams Jack down and hits a pretty decent Vadersault for the pin and a count of like 3. This is why the rest period is stupid: the guy is up to a knee when the count starts.

They go to the ramp again and in perhaps the sickest bump I have ever seen, Cactus tries a sleeper out there but Vader drops backwards onto him. The THUD is absolutely sick and Cactus just stops dead. He ruptured his kidney on that and more or less couldn’t move but he kept going because it would have made him look weak. My jaw actually dropped on that shot.

Vader, nice guy that he is, drills him with a chair as Race wants a DDT on the chair. There it is and Cactus is more or less deceased. No cover as Patrick brings over the trainer for Jack. Wait was there a pin in there that I missed? Vader beats up the medics and there’s the pin. Ok I’m not crazy. During the rest period Cactus DDTs Vader on the chair but as he’s trying to get up Race uses the tazer on the leg (might be nice to turn it on to play it up) of Foley and it’s over.

Rating: A. The ending is the only thing keeping this from an A+. This is an absolute WAR. Other than the rest periods (stupid WCW) there isn’t a single break of action in the whole sixteen minutes of this. Great match and of course since Cactus was over with the fans and having better and better matches, he was thrown into a tag team and more or less forgotten about until he was fired when Hogan arrived next year. Typical WCW.

Jack DDTs Race post match for fun to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Oh man this was weak. The main event is the ONLY thing there is worth seeing on here. If you like brawls that match is must see. The other two and a half hours shouldn’t be mentioned again. Just a terrible show with the only other highlight being Jesse and Tony’s costumes. Terribly boring show that is typical of WCW in this year. Watch the main event and that’s it. Bischoff was a Civil War soldier if you care for some reason.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

USWA Wrestling Challenge
Date: August 11, 1989
Location: Sportatorium, Dallas, Texas
Commentator: Marc Lowrance

This is the first of I think six episodes I have of this. I don’t have them all in order and I have no idea where to find them otherwise, so I won’t be able to put up the one from August 18. Other than that though this is from the late 80s (obviously) and it’s as good as anything else while I find a copy of the Raw I was going to do. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from a World Class show from last week with Eric Embry facing someone from Japan in a cage. The idea here is that if Embry, a Memphis guy, wins, then the Memphis guys get to stay in WCCW but if he loses then they’re all gone. Apparently we’ll get the ending later because that’s all we see here.

This is a USWA show from Dallas which is something I’ve never seen before. I’d assume that means Embry won. Marc Lowrence, the longtime WCCW commentator, is host. Short version: Memphis (CWA) and Dallas (WCCW) merged to form the USWA to try to fight McMahon and Crockett and it lasted all of a year before they split again.

Skandor Akbar talks about how Devastation Inc is tired of not getting acknowledged. They’re coming for the Memphis guys.

Lowrance takes us back to the cage match and the fans are all behind Embry. Embry is the booker from Foley’s book that liked to book sans clothes. Eric wins with a fluke rollup.

After a break Embry and Percy Pringle (Paul Bearer) take down the WCCW banner and put up a USWA banner. I’m really not entirely sure what’s going on here but it’s as basic of the idea as I can get it. From what I can understand, that cage match was the culmination of a LONG story (as in like 6 months to a year) between Embry and Devastation Inc.

WCCW had been taken over by evil (Fritz had legitimately sold to Jerry Jarrett at this point so the Von Erichs got toned WAY down) Japanese people and Eric represented the good guys of the USWA. He won the match to bring in a new era, which was wanted/needed. This is all based off info I can find elsewhere and not from the TV show mind you.

Billy Travis, a WCCW guy, talks very nervously about how he’s glad to be here.

Eric and Percy are here to talk about the USWA. I’m not sure if USWA was the name in Memphis or not. They talk about how they’re glad the evil ones are gone and they’ll try not to let us down.

Jimmy Jack Funk/Kerry Von Erich vs. Al Perez/Taurus Bulba

Perez vs. Kerry gets us going. They fight for position early and then get in each others’ faces. Kerry grabs the arm and it’s off to Jimmy Jack. The guys on the apron almost get into it out there as (and by that I mean Marc talking to himself) talk about the cage match. Kerry throws the chair at Taurus. Akbar is at ringside too. Lowrance talks about how all of the good things from WCCW will be around in the USWA also. Bulba comes in but misses an elbow to Funk. Back to Von Erich who LOUDLY says put your foot up, which is exactly what Taurus does in the corner. Bulba runs from the Claw and takes Kerry back down.

An elbow drop keeps Kerry down as Akbar talks about how awesome Devastation Inc is. Bulba comes off the top but jumps into the Claw. He makes the rope though and it heads to the floor. The Claw goes on outside and they go towards the crowd. Bulba goes into the post and allegedly we’re at 10 minutes. More like 4 but whatever. Tornado Punch sends Bulba into the barricade but Perez hits Kerry with a chair. Everything breaks down and somehow there isn’t a DQ.

We have four minutes left in the time limit and Kerry is double teamed in the corner. Perez hooks a sleeper on Kerry and takes him down with three minutes to go. Kerry gets out and punches Perez down. Off to Funk and everything breaks down again. Somehow we’re now down to one minute as they’re not even trying to hide the clock changes. A lot of pins are broken up but Kerry gets the Claw on Perez with 15 seconds left. And never mind because it’s a draw.

Rating: C. This was a pretty high impact brawl and I’d assume it was to advance a Perez vs. Kerry feud, which is fine. Bulba was a Mongolian which is a tried and true indy heel gimmick. Not a great match or anything but the crowd was into it and it wasn’t a bad match at all. The clock thing was just laughable though.

A guy who isn’t named doesn’t like to be in Texas but likes Arkansas. He’s part of Devastation Inc though. Oh it’s Gary Young.

Tojo Yamamoto and Akbar get equal time and say they’ll be here. They’re coming for Eric and Pringle. There’s a $100,000 bounty involved somewhere.

USWA Tag Titles: Jeff Jarrett/Matt Borne vs. Cactus Jack Manson/Scott Braddock

Manson is Foley and his team has the titles. Frank Duschek is with the challengers. He was the WCCW boss and was fired by Akbar, who is here of course as well. Braddock is thrown into Akbar on the floor and it’s Jarrett vs. Jack to start. Now there’s a pairing. Jarrett works the arm to control and has Jack hiding in the corner. There was talk of a break but I don’t think we ever went to one.

Braddock comes in and walks into an armdrag of his own. Here’s Borne in pink shorts. He’s no Bret Hart in them but he has a good clothesline. Back to Jarrett and the arm work continues. Back to Borne who grabs the arm again. Now we take a break and come back to a promo of Jarrett and Borne WITH THE TAG TEAM TITLES. They say they’ll deal with anyone that wants a shot.

Back with Jarrett working on the arm of Braddock some more. Off to Manson who rams Jarrett into the buckle then clotheslines him down to block Jarrett’s flips. Off to Braddock who slams Jeff for two. Cactus throws him to the floor and hits the elbow off the apron (called The Consequences here, which is a perfect name for it). That gets two back inside as it occurs to me we’ve never been told who the champions are. It’s Jack/Braddock, but we’ve never been told that.

Jack throws him to the floor and tries another Consequences, but Jeff moves and crawls for the corner. A diving tag brings in the pink shorts wearing Maniac to pound of Manson. Everything breaks down and Borne snaps off a quick German suplex on Jack for the pin and the titles. It’s a huge pop, but man it would have sucked to watch this on TV and have the ending spoiled.

Rating: C. Pretty boring tag match for the most part but the ending was a lot better. That being said, I’d have liked it a lot better if I hadn’t seen Jarrett and Braddock with the belts halfway through the thing. These guys would trade the titles for awhile until Jack left to go to I think WCW. Not much of a match but a title change is always worth seeing.

Lowrance wraps up the show and in something you don’t often hear on a wrestling show, says have a good weekend and worship at the church of your choice. He retired from wrestling to become a minister but it’s still odd to hear. Nothing wrong with it mind you, just not something you often hear.

Overall Rating: C. This was a really bad episode to jump in on. The feuds that were featured here were some VERY hot stories back in the day and it brought Dallas back from a bad slump they had been in, although it was short lived because of backstage politics with the WCCW guys pulling out of the USWA, making that company a Memphis exclusive in about a year or so. Still, fun stuff and a cool look at an interesting time in wrestling history. I don’t have the 8/18 show but I do have 8/25 which is up next.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling book as low as $4 at:

Backlash 2004
Date: April 18, 2004
Location: Rexall Place, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Attendance: 13,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re back to the PPV series again and this time it’s Backlash in Canada. The main event is a rematch of the main event of Wrestlemania XX with Benoit defending his newly won title against Shawn and HHH. The original is said to be the best triple threat match ever and a lot of the time the Backlash rematches are even better due to the lack of pressure from Wrestlemania. We’re also in Benoit’s hometown so if he was the favorite in MSG, this is going to be about 10x louder. There’s also a hardcore match between Cactus Jack and Randy Orton which is awesome. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about Benoit winning the title at Wrestlemania, as if it could be anything else. The tagline of “and so it begins again” is nice as it’s a play off of the Wrestlemania tagline of “Where It All Begins Again.”

Shelton Benjamin vs. Ric Flair

Flair is still in Evolution and Shelton is the hot young singles star looking to make a name for himself. He beat HHH twice in a row, once by pin and once by countout. Flair is here to avenge The Game. Shelton takes him into the corner but Flair comes back with his chops and punches. The Stinger Splash misses but Shelton lands on the top rope and gets down unharmed. Benjamin speeds things up and dropkicks Flair to the floor.

Nothing happens out there so we head back in for a thumb to the eye. Flair goes up and you know how that ends. Another thumb to the eye lets Flair take over but Shelton will have none of that and pounds away on Flair’s old head in the corner. Flair takes the knee out and the momentum shifts very fast. He doesn’t work on it long and it’s time for the Figure Four. Shelton blocks it for a bit but the leg goes down and the hold goes on.

Flair uses the rope to cheat so the hold is broken. A chop gets two. Flair goes back to the knee but gets caught by the Dragon Whip kick to put both guys down. Shelton whips him into the corner and Flair crashes over the top and out to the floor. Flair pulls out a weapon of some sort but gets splashed in the corner. A top rope clothesline pins the Nature Boy.

Rating: C+. This was fine for an opener. Shelton was a rising star at this point and a win over Flair wasn’t going to hurt anything. He would get the IC Title by the end of the year and he would become the next big star that never became a big star for various reasons. Still though, good stuff here and fine for an opening match which got the crowd going.

Orton says Shelton is overrated and we should talk about Randy’s winning streak instead. Why aren’t people talking about him holding the IC Title longer than anyone in seven years? He’s beaten legend after legend and tonight it’s Mick Foley’s turn. Mick is like an old dog that has to be put down.

Jonathan Coachman vs. Tajiri

You read that right. Tajiri misted Coach a few weeks ago, then Coach cost Tajiri a match against Christian. Coach armdrags him down to start and Tajiri isn’t sure what to make of that. Coach keeps trying to tie him up but Tajiri keeps firing away kicks. They go to the floor and Tajiri kicks the post to change the flow of the match. Back in and Coach cannonballs down onto the leg and Tajiri is in trouble. Coach hooks a leg bar but Tajiri reverses into a kind of half crab which is pretty quickly broken up.

The leg bar goes on again so Tajiri kicks him in the back. Another to the face and the hold is finally broken up. Coach goes up and gets crotched, allowing a baseball slide dropkick to the back of the head to connect. Handspring elbow sets up another dropkick and it’s rapid fire strike time. Coach grabs a cheating rollup for two. Like an idiot, Coach charges at Tajiri in the corner and is put in the Tarantula for his efforts. Garrison Cage comes out and distracts Tajiri for no apparent reason and Coach rolls him up for the pin.

Rating: D+. You know, this wasn’t half bad. There’s no reason for it to be on PPV, but the match wasn’t all that bad. Coach kept it simple by going after the legs which is the best thing to do against a martial artist so I can’t fault him there. The ending was stupid but this was such a big surprise that it wasn’t a big deal.

HHH arrived earlier.

We recap Jericho vs. Christian/Trish which was an awesome storyline. It started with Jericho hitting on Trish which turned out to be a bet between Jericho and Christian about whether or not he could get Trish in bed. Trish found out about it but Jericho said that he really loved Trish, which seemed legit. Christian turned on Jericho in a show of tough love and they had a match at Mania. Trish turned on Jericho to give Christian the win. Tonight it’s about revenge.

Christian/Trish Stratus vs. Chris Jericho

Evil Trish was HOT. Jericho slaps Christian down and glares at Trish who runs. The chase is on but Christian’s sneak attack is broken up with ease. The evil ones have to tag here so the guys start. Jericho hits a vertical suplex and the posing cover (POP) for two. The crowd keeps chanting SL** at Trish and Christian missees a charge to send him to the floor. The springboard dropkick puts Christian on the floor and Jericho stands tall.

Trish can’t sneak in a Chick Kick and the guys head back in for a top rope back elbow by Jericho, getting two. Jericho gets sent into Trish but gets draped over the top forp to give Christian control. He does the same thing over the barricade and it’s off to Trish. She slaps Jericho and gives us a great cleavage shot at the same time. Chick Kick gets no cover so it’s back to Captain Charisma. A quick Walls attempt is countered but Jericho’s head winds up between Christian’s legs ala Sting.

Jericho comes back with the sleeper drop for two. Trish slaps Jericho, allowing for an elevated reverse DDT out of the corner by Christian which gets two. Trish tries to come in but gets spanked for her troubles. That’s a lucky Jericho. Christian hits the Unprettier out of nowhere but Trish’s cover only gets two.

Trish tries to come back in but gets clotheslined down. Christian takes Jericho down and now only the referee is on his feet. Trish rolls to the floor and Jericho hits the running hip attack while Christian is in 619 position. Lionsault gets knees and Christian puts on a Texas Cloverleaf. Jericho escapes and tries the Walls but instead he catapults Christian into Trish. The running enziguri gets the pin on Christian.

Rating: B-. Another good match here and it evens the score in this feud as it was supposed to do. This was a very well constructed feud and it made sense all the way through. This would lead to a cage match on Raw where Christian would be hurt, putting him on the shelf for four months. Again I’d like to reiterate: evil Trish is HOT.

Eugene has a magazine and wanders into the women’s locker room where Gail freaks out. Regal gets him out.

We get a video about Chris Benoit Day in Edmonton which I think was on Hard Knocks. Benoit’s family is here. This is kind of hard to see now.

Women’s Title: Victoria vs. Lita

Victoria is champion and is looking good here. Lita tries to speed things up to start but gets thrown to the mat with a kind of armdrag. They both tumble out to the floor which goes nowhere. A bad looking backslide gets two for Victoria. They do a pinfall reversal sequence which goes nowhere. Victoria slams her down and hits her dancing moonsault for two followed by a chinlock. A floatover snap suplex gets two for the champ.

This has been a really slow paced and dull match so far. A surfboard goes on and Lita is in even more trouble. The spinning side slam is countered and Lita knocks her down with some clotheslines. Lita hooks a hurricanrana and then puts on a sleeper which transitions into a kind of triangle choke. That gets escaped pretty easily and the spinning side slam gets two. Victoria’s moonsault misses (as in Lita rolled too slowly and the arms hit her) but the Twist of Fate is countered and a small package retains the title.

Rating: F+. This was one of the worst matches I can remember with the girls in a long time. It was REALLY slow paced and the botches were noticeably bad. The division was in big need of something fresh, which is why we got Lita vs. Trish again, as both of them were just awesome at what they did. Horrible match.

Gail and Molly beat down the other girls post match.

We recap Orton vs. Foley. The idea here is that Orton is young and awesome and Foley is old and not so awesome. Orton was the Legend Killer and Orton wanted to take him out to prove that it was his time now. Foley didn’t want to fight and walked away for months, before returning at the Rumble to destroy Orton. Evolution helped Orton out so Foley brought in The Rock to even things up a bit. Evolution won at Wrestlemania so now Foley wants a rematch on his terms: hardcore. Foley says that hardcore is about doing it for the fans, but there’s a tiny part of him that enjoys this. He’s going to love what he does to Orton tonight.

Intercontinental Title: Cactus Jack vs. Randy Orton

Hardcore of course. Foley comes out as Mick Foley and has the Mankind music, but screw that. He’s in Cactus Jack attire and this is a hardcore match. He has the barbed wire ball bat called Barbie with him. Orton holds up a trashcan to defend himself but Foley knocks it out of his hands with the bat. They go to the floor and there goes a cameraman. Orton drop toeholds him into the steps and gets the bat but they fight over it.

Orton gets kicked away but he finds a trashcan from somewhere and cleans Mick’s clock with it. Mick shrugs that off and BLASTS Orton with it. Back in the ring and Foley hits the running knee lift followed by a legdrop for two. Back to the floor again and Jack hits a swinging neckbreaker but Orton moves before the middle rope elbow can be used. Randy, who is still in his t-shirt, tries to walk away but Foley chases after him. A belly to back suplex by the champion gets two on the ramp, as does a backslide.

Randy slams Jack’s head into the ramp with a THUD for two. Back in the ring (I’ve been saying variations of that a lot tonight) and Orton tries to drive Barbie into Jack’s face, but Cactus counters with a low blow. Here’s Socko but Foley isn’t sure whether to use that or Barbie. He takes the sock off and Barbie connects with Orton’s head. Blood is literally flowing down Orton’s face. Another shot hits Orton’s head and Foley is in complete control.

Mick pounds Orton down in the corner and hits the running knee to the face. Back to Barbie as Mick has that look in his eyes. Now he just drives the bat into Orton’s face and there goes the t-shirt. Foley puts the bat between Orton’s legs and drops a leg on it which is just painful in a lot of ways. Mick goes to the floor and pulls out…..oh geez he pulls out a gas can and a lighter.

He covers Barbie in gas but here’s Bischoff to say do that and the show ends here. Foley throws it down and for the life of me I have never gotten what the point of that sequence was unless it was somehow legit. Either way, Foley throws it down and finds a whole board covered in barbed wire. He knocks Orton near it but Orton comes back with a slam onto the board, drawing a LOUD holy chant from the fans.

The board gets placed in the corner and after some nice reversals on the Irish whip, Foley goes into it face first. With Jack down in the ropes, Orton shoves the board down onto him in a simple but good move. Orton finds a bag full of thumbtacks. The RKO onto them is countered and the look on Orton’s face when his back hits the tacks is PERFECT. A rollup gets two for Foley as Orton goes to look for medical attention. Jack will have none of that and they go up the ramp.

They head backstage but come back before we can get a camera back there. Foley throws him off the stage and through a bunch of tables. Since it’s Cactus Jack, you know he’s gonna drop the elbow onto Orton on top of that. After the referees seem ready to stop it, Foley drills them both and there’s the elbow. Mick is a bit too dead to cover though so after the delay, Orton SOMEHOW kicks out.

Back to the ring and Orton looks completely out of it. Double Arm DDT gets two and Foley isn’t sure what else he can do to pull this off. Orton goes to the floor while Foley puts the barbed wire board up in the corner. While he’s doing that though Orton gets Barbie from somewhere and lays in a few shots on Cactus. Foley finds Socko and grabs the Claw to stop a big shot to the head with Barbie. A low blow gets Orton out of the hold and the RKO puts Foley down but it only gets two. Another RKO onto Barbie FINALLY gets the pin.

Rating: A. It’s not quite as good as the match with Edge but DANG this was great. Orton is now a made man as he somehow not only survived this but he won it. Up to this point he was a pretty boy, much like HHH vs. Jack in 2000 at the Rumble. That seems to be what they were going for here and for the most part I’d certainly say it worked. Foley would go away for awhile while Orton feuded with Edge and then won the title in the fall. Great match here and Orton looked great during the whole thing.

HHH says that Orton has become a legend rather than a legend killer. Also Benoit won’t get lucky again tonight and HHH will get his title back.

La Resistance vs. Hurricane/Rosey

This is what we call a filler match to bring the crowd back down. It isn’t even for a title. Conway and Hurricane start and the crowd goes almost completely silent. A headscissors takes Conway down and it’s off to Rosey. That’s really only so he can throw at Conway and it’s back to the storm guy.

Conway hits a swinging neckbreaker and powerslam before tagging in Grenier. Grenier puts on a powerslam and here’s Eugene. Hurricane tags Rosey as Eugene plays with the flags. Rosey misses a corner splash but Hurricane dives on both French dudes on the floor. Eugene runs the ropes but does nothing else. Eye of the Huricane gets the pin on Grenier.

Rating: D+. The match could have and probably should have been on Raw, but dang I always feel sorry for the people in this match. They know no one is really interested in seeing them out there but they have to go out and work a match anyway, which no one wants to see and that no one is going to talk about, but they do it anyway. This was fine and Eugene didn’t add or subtract anything.

We recap Edge vs. Kane. Edge is back from neck surgery and needs an opponent, so he gets Kane, end of recap.

Edge vs. Kane

Edge has a broken wrist or arm or something too. Edge fires off a right hand (the good hand) for no effect. He gets Kane into the corner as JR is talking about football for some reason. Middle rope clothesline looks to set up the spear but Kane heads to the outside. Kane finally wakes up and rams the bad arm and hand into the steps to take over.

Back in and he hammers on the hand some more as the fans chant that Hebner screwed Bret for the millionth time in this match alone. Lawler amuses himself by singing the Mountie’s song Sidewalk slam sets up a missed elbow and Edge comes back with a spinwheel kick. He takes Kane down again but Kane sits up. The referee is sent to the floor so a cast shot to the head and a spear get the pin.

Rating: D-. What a horribly uninteresting match. Edge didn’t get out of the funk that he was in for the better part of a year and Kane had to marry Lita to get anything going. I didn’t like this at all and I don’t think many other people did either. Let’s go with this: Tajiri vs. Coach was a much more entertaining match. Let that sink in for a minute.

We recap the main event, which is just a rematch from Wrestlemania but here in Benoit’s hometown. It should be entertaining at least and there isn’t much else to say.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit’s pop is INSANE. He puts the title in both of their faces during his entrance which is a nice touch. The champ goes after HHH to start and doesn’t want Shawn to get any of the Game for some reason. HHH is sent to the floor so Shawn and Benoit can chop it out. The Game comes back in and hits the flying knee to Shawn. Benoit is thrown to the floor and it’s the DX explosion. After a quick fight they knock Benoit back to the floor, drawing a ton of booing.

Benoit comes back in and hits Germans on both guys. Jerry says it’s hard to see who is doing what to who. No not really King, not really. Shawn gets flipped in the corner and out to the floor to get it back down to two. HHH jumps into the Crossface but Benoit lets it go to stop Shawn. Shawn’s back is rammed into the barricade twice to keep him down on the outside. Benoit goes up but HHH punches him in the jaw to slow him down.

HHH loads up a superplex but Shawn makes the save. Benoit literally falls off the top rope all the way to the floor. That’s a much scarier sight given what we know now. Shawn drops HHH in an electric chair for two. HHH comes back with a facebuster and Benoit’s Swan Dive gets two on HBK. The Game goes to the floor and Shawn’s forearm takes out the referee. Shawn goes to the floor now so we get both a Pedigree and Sharpshooter counter. The second attempt at the Sharpshooter works on HHH but Shawn makes the save. His save is countered into the Crossface but there’s no referee, so we better let go of the hold right?

Now Shawn puts the Sharpshooter on Benoit and Earl Hebner comes out to be the second referee. Ha Ha Ha it’s like Montreal yes WE GET IT ALREADY! Shawn swings at Benoit but gets caught in the Crossface again, only to have it broken up by HHH. A HHH DDT gets two on the champion. Benoit throws him over the corner and it’s back to HBK vs. Benoit. Chris gets thrown to the floor, landing on top of HHH.

Shawn tries to dive on the both of them but crashes through the table in a good explosion. Back in the ring Benoit’s shoulder goes hard into the post and then it does it a second time. Instead of going after the arm, the Cerebral Assassin puts on a camel clutch. The fans FINALLY drop the Bret stuff and chant for Benoit. HHH pounds away in the corner but gets caught in snake eyes to put him down.

It’s basically a one on one match at the moment. Benoit ducks a right hand and puts on Rolling Germans. The Swan Dive misses and there’s a Pedigree but HHH’s cover takes awhile, allowing Shawn to come back from the dead for the save. With Benoit down, Shawn hits the forearm to put HHH down. The top rope elbow hits but again Shawn can’t cover. Shawn loads up the superkick but instead kicks Benoit off the apron to make him PURE EVIL in Canada.

HHH hits a low blow for two on Shawn and everyone is down. Pedigree is countered by a backdrop to the floor but the fans won’t cheer Shawn period. HHH comes back in with the sledgehammer, drilling it right into Shawn’s back. HHH sets for another hammer shot to Shawn but Benoit makes the save, only to get sent into the steps. The Game sets for a Pedigree onto the steps but Benoit counters with a slingshot to send that nose into the post. Back in, Chin Music is countered into the Sharpshooter and after a LONG time, it’s finally over with Benoit retaining by submission.

Rating: B+. I really couldn’t get into this one as much as the other one. There was a lot more laying around this time, but this was a different kind of match. This was all about having a Benoit showcase instead of having a masterpiece. Considering the situations here, it’s hard to argue with them going that route. It worked well enough here though and it was a great match.

Overall Rating: B. With two very good to great matches here, the rest of the stuff can be overlooked. This was a very Canadian heavy show which is the right idea as, you know, it was in Canada. Unfortunately Benoit would fall through the floor after this because HHH and Shawn decided to completely dominate the show for the summer, having a 55 minute match at Bad Blood. You know, because that’s what people are begging for here clearly. This was a show with great parts, rather than a great show if that makes sense, but it’s still good.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Remember to follow me on Twitter @Kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Spring Stampede 1994
Date: April 17, 1994
Location: Rosemont Horizon, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 12,200
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

Again, just trying to complete 1994. This is about one thing: Flair vs. Steamboat. One day I’ll get to their epic three match series and explain why they’re so freaking awesome. Anyway, Flair kept the belt at SuperBrawl and this is the match he gets as a result.  Other than that it’s exactly what you would expect from this era: bad feuds that no one cared at all about. Hogan would show up in three months and change everything. After that you would have old guys with less talent having bad feuds that no one cared about. Let’s get to it.

The intro tries to make this into a Western theme and no one cares. Oh dang this is the street fight match that I completely forgot about. That match is greatness wrapped up in a nice bread with sweetness sauce on it. Now I’m excited.

Aaron Neville, an R&B singer does the National Anthem. I’ve at least heard of him.

Johnny B. Badd vs. Diamond Dallas Page

He’s a sheriff in red tonight. Yep he looks like an idiot but he’s opening ANOTHER PPV. Is this a sick joke or something? The line of HE’S SO BAD always makes me laugh as I guarantee it’s not meant to sound the way I’m thinking about it. Page is still completely worthless here but whatever. Kimberly always looked great though. Page has money now and is rich so he gives Heenan a thing with his initials in diamonds on it so now he’s loved.

Page is in an armbar and needs to have his mouth washed out with soap apparently. Heenan and Tony get into a stupid argument about stomachs as you can tell they’re not that interested in this either. These two would feud for what felt like ever and it just never would end. This hasn’t been bad but it certainly hasn’t been that good either. Badd more or less botches a headscissors and then dives over the top to make up for it. The top rope sunset flip ends this.

Rating: C+. Not bad but not great. The fans were into Badd so that’s a fine choice for the opener. This was a pair that kept going at it for months and before Page finally lost the final match, Badd went to WWF and got laughed at on WCW TV.

Gene and Ventura talk about a few matches.

TV Title: Brian Pillman vs. Steven Regal

Pillman is a face now having split from Austin a little while ago. I can’t get over that that is Bill Dundee with Regal. They emphasize that this is a 15 minute match just to emphasize that this will end up in a draw. Pillman starts off fast to try to make this better. This should actually be an interesting match to be fair. We’re on the floor now and Pillman is freaking working the arm of Regal. It’s been all Pillman at this point.

Heenan’s mic messes up for a bit but is back now. Just as I’m about to say that Regal is in control again, Pillman gets a quick rollup for two. Regal is freaking SCARY good on the mat as we’re at five minutes. Regal is just stretching Pillman a million ways from Sunday. Why is it always Sunday? I’ve never gotten that one. For once the shot at the crowd makes sense here which is as rare as possible. Basically this is Regal just beating the living heck out of Pillman while Brian sells like a master.

We get down to five minutes to go and you can more or less call the rest of the match from that point on. Pillman busts out an enziguri of all things with about a minute to go. That came from nowhere. And the time runs out and the fans hate it. This was something they did a lot and the fans never liked it at all, much like I don’t here.

Rating: B-. This was Regal just putting on a freaking show out there and Pillman being the challenger of the week. Even still this was pretty good and it worked for what it was supposed to be. Regal was freaking amazing before he got so screwed up.

Sting says he’ll win.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Cactus Jack/Maxx Payne

This is a street fight with falls counting anywhere so call it a hardcore match. This match is more or less epic as they more or less kill each other for about 9 minutes. I’m fired up for this. They don’t even make it to the ring. Well at least Cactus and Brian don’t. How weird is it that Cactus was probably the more normal of those two men? Cactus hits Knobbs in the face with half of a pool cue which at least isn’t metal so it’s a bit more believable.

They have two referees here which is smart for a change. There’s nothing here but violence and they’re living it up out there with it. This is a freaking war with the cameras having issues keeping up with it. Now I know I have a reputation for hating these things, but a few things to keep in mind here. Number one, the stuff they’re using isn’t incredibly over the top. There are chairs, trash cans, a pool cue (a bit of a stretch but not really) and various things they find in the arena.

There aren’t scissors or screwdrivers etc. Second, this is the culmination of a big feud between these guys. Payne and Knobbs are fighting in a souvenir stand in case you were wondering. But yeah, this isn’t just a random brawl for the sake of having a random brawl. They had built this feud up for months but it kept ending in a DQ. The story makes sense to end like this.

Third, these guys can actually work decent matches without weapons. I’ve yet to see Sabu or New Jack do so. Finally, there aren’t any ridiculous spots here to suck the life out of it. There’s no scaffold or whatever. They’re beating the tar out of each other and you get the feeling that they want to kill each other. HOKEY SMOKE!

Foley was covering Jerry and Knobbs came from nowhere with a shovel (Jack’s trademark at the time so it makes sense) and just blasts the heck out of him with it. Sags takes the shovel and with Cactus on the ground, Sags crushes Cactus’ head with it kind of like a conchairto. Payne goes through a real table after it anyway, before it was a clichéd spot.

Rating: A-. This was freaking AWESOME. Like I said though, there were a lot of differences here that made the thing far better than your typical brawl. The main thing was the amount of brutal spots and the total lack of stopping. Watch this match as it’s just freaking awesome. This was brutal now but back then this was EPIC.

US Title: Great Muta vs. Steve Austin

Now here’s something you won’t see every day. It’s post 1989 so Muta is likely going to suck here. Austin is wearing black now and eve has a black vest on. He’s been talking more and even cursed a bit around this time. Keep in mind: HE WAS FIRED FOR HAVING NO POTENTIAL. We get the inevitable comparison of Sting and Muta which really was true. Also for you indy fans that think Danielson is so innovative: Muta was using the Cattle Mutilation when Danielson was about 7 years old.

Muta hooks an abdominal stretch which was one of his big moves actually. Austin was a rising star at this point and a win over Muta would be HUGE for him. It amazes me that Austin so much of a technical guy back in the day and how much of a different style he had in just three years. We get like our 5th mention of Aaron Neville. We get it the guy can sing.

Muta goes insane and scares Austin to death which is saying a lot. I’m in awe here as Austin is chain wrestling Muta to perfection. Make that 6 Neville references. DUDE, no one cares! Parker goes after Muta. That’s just freaking stupid. Muta is being dominated here which is awesome as it’s letting Austin look great.

After about five minutes of getting beaten down, he realizes he’s the Great Muta and this is 1994 and he’s wrestling Steve Austin so here’s the comeback…which lasts 8 seconds as Austin is dominating again. The crowd is ALL behind Muta mind you. Austin uses some messed up leg lock called the Hollywood and Vine. Oh dear. Muta wakes up and just goes insane to fire the crowd up.

The fans know their old school guys…and then they screw it all up by having Muta get disqualified for back dropping Austin over the ropes. I FREAKING HATE THAT RULE!!! The fans rightfully boo that out of the arena.

Rating: B. I freaking loved this thing. Muta made Austin look great here and for once was working himself to death out there at the end with the fans eating it up. Then WCW managed to screw up the entire match with that LAME ending. I hate WCW at times, I truly do.

Dustin says Texas > Tennessee.

WCW International Title: Sting vs. Rick Rude

Oh dear the International Title. This is the last remnant of the NWA. More or less the WCW Title and the NWA Title were the same thing as they were unified. Then in September of 1993 WCW left the NWA but due to a ridiculous legal battle, Ric Flair owned the big gold belt that the NWA had been using for about 7 years. Once they left, the NWA Title and the WCW Title were separate because the NWA sucked.

In other words, there were two titles. When the NWA was out of the picture, they just named it the WCW International Title. They unified them at a Clash of the Champions in like two months or so. Race comes down and says that Vader wants the winner of the match then tries to jump Sting which goes badly for him. This is one of Rude’s last matches actually as he would get injured in the rematch of this in Japan and never wrestle again.

They’re doing a mat based thing here which is odd but fine I guess. It’s weird to think that Rude would be gone so quickly from the ring. Rude hits his traditional chinlock because he’s required by law to do it or something like that. He gets a sleeper and has Sting more or less out and just lets go. Well no one ever said Rude was a genius or anything like that. Sting was so freaking over it’s scary.

He’s the Ultimate Warrior with talent and restraint. That’s a scary thought. Yep the referee goes down just as Sting gets the Scorpion. Race runs down to interfere again as does Vader. Bockwinkle, the commissioner, is at ringside during this. Race misses a chair shot and hits Rude for both the title change and the roof being blown off of the place. Sting was as over as free beer in a frat house here.

Rating: C+. Not a great match but the fans ate this up with a spoon. The big gold belt looks great on Sting too. These two had some good matches just like Warrior had with Rude but a bit better.

Steamboat says he’s ready.

Bunkhouse Buck vs. Dustin Rhodes

This is a bunkhouse match, meaning more or less it’s another street fight but with a Southern name. You’re supposed to wear street clothes to it or something. It was one of Dusty’s ideas so go with that. This is a very slow match and compared to what you had earlier, this isn’t nearly as impressive. There’s a piece of wood that they keep using which is annoying for some reason.

This is a bloodier fight and in some ways it’s better, but at the same time it’s far too slow to really be considered better than the first one tonight. After getting beaten on for a long time, Dustin makes his comeback. He was finally getting the hang of things around this time but it didn’t matter as Hogan came in and cleaned house.

He would be gone in about a year and be in WWF where he had by far the best run of his career. After the Colonel interferes, a shot with brass knuckles ends this with Buck getting the win. This was fun if nothing else.

Rating: B-. This was a fight but it was a different kind of fight. There was a lot of blood and by the end of it you could see that Dustin was very tired which was fine. If this was about 4 minutes shorter it was a lot better though.

The Boss vs. Vader

Rude is ticked that Vader and Race cost him the title. This was supposed to be Starrcade I think but obviously that never happened.Guess who the Boss is. Almost right off the bat, Vader takes a HARD whip into the railing. Like I’ve said before, Boss was perfect for this feud as he had the size and power to stand up to Vader but wasn’t big enough that Vader’s offense would make no sense against him. This is a freaking fight. All night long has been physical but it’s been reigned in which is a huge help to it and it’s making the thing work a lot better. Vader is bleeding from the eye. That can’t be a good thing at all.

They’re just punching the tar out of each other here and it’s AWESOME stuff. Boss throws a freaking DDT off the middle rope. I’m into this also if you can’t tell. There’s not a lot to say here as it’s just them beating the crap out of each other with STIFF shots. The Vader Bomb gets two but the Vadersault ends this.

I don’t think Boss ever pinned Vader even though they feuded all summer. Post match Boss goes nuts on Vader and Race with the nightstick. In the back Bockwinkle takes the stick and the cuffs away from him, leading to him becoming the Guardian Angel.

Rating: B. Again, this was far more of a fight than a match but it worked VERY well. The matches would get progressively worse, but the first ones were straight up fights. This worked fine although it could have been better. Just awesome fighting here which never gets old.

WCW World Title: Ric Flair vs. Ricky Steamboat

Oh like this needs an introduction. They fight over a bunch of wrestling holds which gets us nowhere. This is one of those matches that it’s hard to talk about because these two really do nothing but have classics. These are hard to make fun of or anything like that because they’re just awesome. The story here like I’ve said is that Steamboat just asked for a title shot and got one.

Flair was booking and realized there was no great wrestling match on the card so they went with it. There was more or less no chance that Flair was losing here but the match was going to be great no matter what, which is what makes feuds a lot of the time. The technical stuff here never gets old. They started off a lot of their matches like that but as always it was the ending and the middle that set the matches apart from each other.

Just keep in mind: this is the same Flair that was jobbing to Hogan time after time in just a few months. Why was he jobbing? Because Hogan can of course not wrestle for a year and a half and then come back and beat a guy like Flair that can do this and no one questions it. That makes sense right? They fight on the floor a bit and you can see Flair not being as facey as he had been in the recent months. Yes they were turning him heel AGAIN.

Anyway, we go back in the ring and Steamboat is in control. That lasts a few minutes and now Flair is in control. The great thing is that neither option really is better or worse than the other. That’s a rare thing but when it works it works really well. Steamboat hooks the figure four but Flair gets to the ropes. Steamboat is one of the few people that can get away with doing something like that. Finally Flair goes for the knee, and you know what’s coming.

The figure four goes on but Ricky manages to hold on. Keep that in mind as it comes into play later (yes, they use that thing known as psychology here. I know it’s foreign to a lot of people today but nearly 16 years ago all the hall of famers were doing it). Steamboat hooks the top rope suplex and Flair bounces. Both guys are out but it only gets two. The fans are popping for the big spots but other than that they’re quiet.

Not quiet in the when does this end so we can all go home way, but quiet in the this is great stuff way, which it is. Steamboat gets up and both guys look like they could go another 20 minutes or so. That’s freaking impressive. We go back to the double chickenwing which is what Steamboat beat Flair with at the Chi-Town Rumble which was match number one in the epic series.

However, the knee gives out and Steamboat collapses kind of into a Tiger suplex. Both guys’ shoulders are down (the ending to the 2nd match in the series: Clash of the Champions 6, 2/3 falls in a 55 minute classic, which ended with this but Steamboat got his shoulder up then and doesn’t now). Steamboat thinks he’s won the title but instead it’s a draw and Flair keeps the belt. The title was held up and a few days later they had a rematch on Saturday Night where Flair won clean.

Rating: A. In short, this is a match that simply can’t be messed up. They could have a match today and it would be decent. Somehow, this is nothing compared to their three others in the late 80s. Those are coming.

Overall Rating: A-. YES. This is what I’ve been looking for here. Today I’ve watched Beach Blast 93 and December to Dismember. This makes up for those by a long shot. There’s not really a bad match on here. All night long they were working hard and you can see that in the in ring work. This is a very good show and worth going out of your way to see, which isn’t something that can be said that often. AWESOME show and easily the best for WCW for a very long time.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

 

King of the Ring 1997
Date: June 8, 1997
Location: Providence Civic Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Attendance: 9,312
Commentators: Jim Ross, Vince McMahon

Welcome to the dark ages. The NWO is just killing the WWF at the moment and nothing at all is going right for Vince and company. Actually that’s not true, as we have a bald guy that turned face at Mania and is rapidly approaching the biggest star run of about three years in history. He’s got HBK tonight in a completely forgotten match. Other than that of course we have the tournament which is the final four again here which is how it should be on the PPV.

The main event is Farrooq vs. Taker for the title. And they wonder why they were getting their heads handed to them. The Border War is on at the moment and Canadian Stampede is next month, and for those of you that know about that, you know this is an awesome time when sadly no one was watching. Let’s get to it.

Oh apparently Shawn and Austin are the tag champions. Yeah I remember that really well. The intro is as basic as you could get but the music accompanying the pyro is really weird. It’s almost chilling and I love it. Ross says this is like the World Series or the Super Bowl. That’s just amusing.

King of the Ring Semi–Final: Ahmed Johnson vs. HHH

Now to get to this round, Ahmed already beat HHH, but he complained about having had a match that day already so he got another shot and beat Crush to get here. HHH was supposed to win the previous year and get the Austin push, but due to the MSG Incident, there was no one else to punish. HBK was champion and untouchable and Hall and Nash were leaving so HHH took the fall for it.

Johnson was just about to outlive his lifecycle here as a big deal as he would get hurt all the time and would gain too much weight to come back. For some reason Ahmed is on the poster for this show along with Taker, Austin and HBK which is just odd. Again I want to know, WHAT IS THE NEED FOR BRACKETS FOR FOUR PEOPLE??? What in the world happened to all of HHH’s money? Apparently he had a wrestling tutor. I want one of those!

Ahmed beats on him for a bit and then throws in a curtsey, which I don’t like as he’s supposed to more or less be a killing machine. It amazes me that HHH started off as such a tiny guy and now is about as big as Johnson. Vince says HHH knows all the tricks of the game. That’s just amusing. It will never cease to amaze me how different the careers of two wrestlers can go. Look at these two.

Who in the world would have guessed that HHH would be a first ballot hall of famer and Ahmed wouldn’t last another year? Ivan Putski trained Johnson. That clears up a lot of things. This is a pretty generic match although it’s not boring. HHH was really just getting the hang of his character and in ring style here and it shows. Ahmed is nothing but power and that shows even worse.

You can also see the beginnings of HHH’s muscle mass creeping in. He actually goes to the top for a double axe which works. They botch what looked like was supposed to be a back body drop but they saved it well enough I guess.

After Ahmed beats on him for a bit and sets for the Plunge, Chyna gets up on the apron to distract him. Granted I would think a shiny penny or a thing of cotton candy would distract Ahmed. It allows HHH to get a knee (shocking) to the back and the Pedigree (looked bad) for the pin.

Rating: C+. Eh, it did its job I guess. HHH wasn’t a jobber anymore as he was really starting to get a lot of what would come to define his character down here. Ahmed was on his way to bigger although I wouldn’t say better things due to injury, but we’ll get to that later on today. Also, HHH has the classical music for his theme here, which I’ve always loved.

We look at the brackets in case you’re intellectually challenged.

King of the Ring Semi–Finals: Mankind vs. Jerry Lawler

Ok, seriously, what’s the second match? Did someone really think this was a good idea? Something tells me this isn’t going to go well. Foley is more or less a face now, but he’s still the freak that no one understands. He beat Vega and Lawler beat Goldust. Seriously, in mid 1997 Lawler was being kind of pushed? Seriously? I guess it makes sense as it helped Mankind’s face turn.

Just to further the brilliant booking, Mankind had to have a botch from the Nation of Domination to let him beat Savio. That’s just freaking stupid but then again, what do I know? Foley cuts a promo about being a King that Vince keeps laughing at for no apparent reason. Vince seriously needs to shut up half of the time. He does quote a few 50s songs so that helps a bit.

Lawler is with Pettingill who has to be on his way out at this point. He does his walking to the ring promo that he did last year which was awesome last year. It’s nowhere near as good this year but I think a big part of that is he didn’t have the same amount of time which messed things up a bit. He does rip into Foley with some good stuff though so there we are. Jerry is a freaking master on the mic.

People today need to pay attention to his old stuff as he’s getting great heat for some very basic insults. LEARN FROM HIM PEOPLE! To the shock of anyone that has no idea what they’re talking about, they start by brawling on the floor.

Lawler spends most of the match running as we get a Memphis and Lawler history lesson from out of absolutely nowhere, as Ross talks about Lawler being discovered by Lance Russell as a disc jockey and then being trained by Jackie Fargo. That came from nowhere and was cool if nothing else. Also, it’s true, which is something you don’t hear about often.

This is pretty much a Lawler 101 match, as he gets beaten down for a bit and then gets the foreign object (I think it was Welsh) for the turnaround while he shouts at the crowd. Hey, it’s worked for 20 years so why change things now? Foley of course takes some sick bumps on the floor as according to Flair, that’s all he knows how to do. I’ll ignore that for now as I don’t want to bash Flair for a page or so.

Lawler hits his running joke of a dropkick. Basically as most of you know, Lawler isn’t exactly a ring master. One night in Memphis he hit a dropkick and acted like it was a huge deal. He kept doing it and it became part of his repitoire, but every time he acted like it was a huge deal. You know, like Cena hitting the FU on Big Show. Piledriver gets two. Apparently Paul Bearer is hanging with Taker again.

In an ending that I liked a lot more than I should have I think, Lawler goes for another piledriver but Mankind reverses with a backdrop. Lawler goes for a sunset flip, but Foley gets the Claw for the knock out win. I LOVE that. It’s so simple that it worked so well. It was completely out of character for Foley, but it showed that he was a lot smarter than he was made out to be. That was really good.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what it was supposed to be. Foley and Lawler are two guys that know what to do out there and they did exactly what they were supposed to do. The problem was that it was mainly Foley taking sick bumps and no selling stuff to come up at the end with a cool finish, which was the only good part about the match. The ending was a nice nod that worked very well, but it couldn’t save this. I mean really, JERRY LAWLER???

We look at the brackets again just because we have to I guess.

Pillman is in the back talking about how he wants Austin, so Austin sneaks up on him to beat on him and shove his head in a toilet, which there just happened to be a camera mounted above. Yeah good job there production team.

Crush vs. Goldust

Is this some screwed up consolation match or something? This is a great example of why the company was in trouble at the time. There was no point to this but they’ll have it anyway. The Nation is about 10 people here which really was a good idea. They used to hire actors to make it look bigger, which really is brilliant. They mention that he used to be in Demolition which is common knowledge but not something you hear about often.

This was around the time when Vince let Ross be himself and it worked a lot better. This moronic crowd actually pops a bit for Goldust. Why they do that is beyond me but whatever. We ever get a Skandor Akbar reference as Ross is going nuts at the moment. This would be right before the Pillman angle started which was the last one he would ever have. Ross says that Pillman is likely nearly suicidal.

That’s another one of those chilling lines that no one knew how chilling it was at the time. Ross mentions that Terri used to do Larry King’s makeup which is another true thing. We go over the Russo based series of turns and twists that the Nation has been going through. It would be blown up somewhat soon as Rock would join and become a star. Apparently a win here would fulfill Goldust’s American Dream.

I love lines like that which a ton of people had no idea what it meant. Ross follows that up with a jab at Bill Watts and we hear the REAL history of the King of the Ring as a disc jockey said that there should be an annual tournament in New England, meaning Boston or Providence. That started in the mid 80s and never stopped. They dropped the New England aspect though which is a shame. Why is it a shame? I don’t know, but whatever.

Ross is sounding like one of my reviews, but with more interesting stuff. Apparently Monsoon is sick and can’t be here, but he’s by the phone in case a decision is needed. You might have noticed I haven’t talked about the match at all. There’s a reason for that: IT SUCKS. I mean seriously, this would be bad on a house show and it’s getting 10 minutes of PPV time. Crush is more or less sitting on the back with his hands on Goldust’s face, which is called a chinlock.

Goldie kicks and slaps the mat to try to get the fans into it and that actually works. There are few universal truths in wrestling, but one of them will always be that the fans love nothing more than to get involved in a match. We’re told that Goldust is a chip off the old block. Whose block? Well we’re not told but whatever. The Nation, read as D’Lo and the lawyer, goes after Terri. The fans scream BEHIND YOU GOLDUST, which is another thing I love about wrestling: the wrestlers don’t listen.

Anyway, they go back in and a DDT ends it. Seriously: this got ten minutes. Apparently Goldust has a European Title match tomorrow night. Was that the point of this match? To build up Goldie for the title match? It might have been better if that was mentioned before the ending of the match.

Rating: D-. When the highlight of the match is Ross and his stories, that’s not a good sign. This just wasn’t interesting at all and there was zero point to putting this on PPV. It wasn’t interesting at all and it was boring as heck on top of it.

Doc is with Sid and the LOD who are all Americans so they’re a team apparently. Hawk is of course odd when speaking.

Todd is with the heels. Davey is Euro Champion and Owen is IC Champion and has two Slammys. Neidhart used to be a champion like 6 years ago. Oh and he would beat Jay Lethal in about 12 years.

Hart Foundation vs. Sid/Legion of Doom

The Harts here are Owen, Jim and Davey, giving us a total of one Hart in the entire Foundation for this match. I love stupid things like that. Why do I have a feeling the heels are going to win and win easily here? This is being written about 3 days after Bret signed with WWE again, so this is very interesting indeed. There’s a sign in the crowd about cheese for no apparent reason.

The faces come out separately which is rather pointless. The LOD get a decent pop but you could tell their time was about over. This takes FOREVER to get going as we get an LOD chant. It’s Owen and Animal to start us up. Hey, call the Superstar line and run up the phone bill to hear bad promos! More or less all we have here is random power matches as five guys in this match are power guys, and no one saw anything wrong with this.

Also, no one saw a problem with putting THE FREAKING LOD AND SID together as a three man team against two good wrestlers and a generic power guy in Anvil, and yet they had the NERVE to wonder why they were having their heads handed to them. Anvil was a political science major at UCLA. All of a sudden my future seems far more bleak. Seriously, who in the WORLD thought Anvil vs. Hawk was a good idea?

You have two guys that have made a career out of not getting hurt. Just as I type that, Hawk takes a piledriver and of course is up before anyone else. Owen comes in and goes insane. Dang how good could he have been as a veteran? Imagine him vs. Angle or Jericho in 2000-2001. Owen would have been in his late 30s then and definitely capable of working well. He’s two and a half months older than Shawn, so it’s completely realistic that he could still be wrestling and having very good matches today.

He EASILY would have won the world title in there somewhere given the absolute awfulness of some of the champions since then. I mean seriously, who would have been better as champion: Owen or Khali? Anyway, this match is just BAD. Yeah, the match ends and I’ve got nothing at all. Owen wins with a top rope sunset flip. Sid would be gone either the next night or in 8 days.

Rating: F. Seriously, WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA??? This fails for reasons that I’ve already given. Owen and Animal were ok, but that’s it. This was just pathetic.

Todd is with Mankind who says that he just can’t wait to be king. Is there any doubt as to why he’s my all time favorite wrestler?

King of the Ring Finals: Mankind vs. HHH

Geez this would be the money feud in about two and a half years. Man I love HHH’s music here. It might be the best music for someone other than a custom made song that I’ve ever heard. I think they kind of screwed up here as Ahmed was more or less the given winner and they him lose clean to someone that was FAR beneath him on the totem poll coming into this. Ross says he can’t picture Chyna as a queen.

That actually is rather amusing. They point out that Mankind has a high IQ and that Dude Love would love tonight. That would happen in about three months. Well I suppose this is better than either guy against Ahmed, which wouldn’t have gone well and Ahmed vs. Lawler would have gone all of 5 minutes at best before Ahmed looked completely awful. To no one’s surprise, this is mainly a brawl.

The mask is already off of Mankind as he’s still selling the neck injury from earlier. The referee throws out Chyna as we’re STILL on the floor. Let’s go to a table just to have some more fun. These were different tables than we’re used to today as they were thicker and sounded much better. A Pedigree through it has Foley more or less out cold. Oh never mind he’s up 12 seconds later.

He’s apparently auditioning for the X Division with that kind of selling. Chyna breaks a scepter over his back which is called his head for some reason by Vince. Let’s just keep it on the floor since it’s worked for about 15 minutes so far. There’s pretty much no flow to this at all as it’s just HHH beating up Foley who takes one sick bump after another.

This is what’s called garbage wrestling, even though there’s a ton of talent in there. To be fair though, the pop for Foley is AWESOME when he kicks out. Another Pedigree gets the pin though, so just like at the 2000 Rumble, the pop is all for naught.

Rating: D+. And the grade here is because I like Foley and won’t give him a failing grade. This was a total and complete mess. It was just way too violent and all over the place with MAYBE 5 minutes of a twenty minute match in the ring. That’s CZW bad level and just completely ridiculous. What was the point of this? I seriously don’t get that. If this had been ten minutes shorter, it would have been light years better.

There is no coronation as he just puts the robe on and beats on Foley some more. They would have an intense show long fight at the next PPV before blowing it off at Summerslam in a great cage match that Foley won.

Austin tells Doc that he doesn’t care about the Harts or the belts, but just wanting to win tonight. We get a quick recap of Austin vs. Shawn. More or less, they both hate the Harts but hate each other. Since Russo is the booker, they are the perfect choices to be tag team champions, which they are here. Austin had beaten up Bret on Raw a few weeks ago after they won the belts which is why he’s not here tonight.

The original big match here was supposed to be Bret vs. Shawn II but they had had a legit backstage fight, and since only Shamrock and maybe Owen could hang with Bret in a legit shoot fight given what Bret knew about submission, they figured it was better to have this instead of Bret potentially killing Shawn.

The Harts throw out an open challenge for Canadian Stampede, which was probably the best crowd in WWF history. As they’re leaving they run into Austin in the back and security stops their near brawl. Austin was rapidly becoming a huge deal around this time and no one knew how big he would become very soon.

Steve Austin vs. Shawn Michaels

This would become the match in about 10 months but here’s it’s just the other main event that really was the biggest match on the card. Shawn says that he is just worried about the match. Doc says this has been a crazy show. Shawn gets a very nice pop, although not epic. As odd as it sounds, this just doesn’t feel like a bit match at all. Shawn would get hurt soon (again) and have to forfeit his half of the belts, which Dude Love took.

Austin would then get hurt and the titles would be forfeited again, this time with the Headbangers of all teams getting them. Austin starts off hot but a Special Olympian falls over the railing and has to be helped up. Well ok then. Shawn of course gets things going a lot faster as you would expect. He flips Austin off in an amusing moment. He goes to the floor and helps the kid to the back, which is fine. If nothing else it’s classy.

You can tell he has a mental disability so it’s perfectly understandable that he simply fell like that. Still, those games are very cool so I can’t complain a bit. They kind of touch on the insane popularity that Austin is reaching. Amazingly enough, this was just the tip of the iceberg to say the least. This is the Austin that was able to wrestle almost any style as he was much faster and much more athletic at this point.

That would change in about 2 months. The look in Austin’s eyes is almost mesmerizing. He just looks awesome on a lot of levels. Austin is MOVING out there. If I didn’t know what he would become I never would have believed it. He hits the floor and pulls back the mats as the fans are into this. This has been more or less all Stone Cold here. He does something that I can’t remember anyone else doing: he ducks the forearm that Shawn uses to start his comebacks.

Well I’ll be. It’s that simple? Both guys are incredibly popular here. We finally get to the finish after a ton of great back and forth stuff, as the referee gets rammed and Austin hits the Stunner. No referee though, so Austin ducks the chin music and somehow stuns the referee and walks into the kick.

More referees come down and they get beaten up too for the double DQ. That’s really the only ending possible here as they made both guys look great and neither could lose. I would have preferred a time limit, but that’s Vince for you.

Rating: A. This was GREAT stuff with two A-list guys beating the tar out of each other in front of a small but hot crowd. It didn’t really further anything as Michaels got hurt, but I liked it a lot which a lot of people likely won’t.

The Nation says Farooq will win.

WWF Title: Farrooq vs. Undertaker

This is really just a token title defense as no one thought the title was changing here at all. Seriously, FARROOQ was the best they could do? They couldn’t have thrown Owen in there or something? Taker tries to talk but Bearer cuts him off. Bearer is controlling Taker because of a secret he’s holding over him, which was that he killed his parents in a fire, where he had a brother as well. You know the story from there. Taker gets a great pop.

That belt just looks right on Taker. Farrooq, as a heel, of course jumps him while Bearer is yelling at him. I really don’t like the idea of power vs. power here. Taker starts out fast but Farrooq fights back with the generic power offense. Oh look the Nation is interfering. Could you write a more basic match than this? I don’t think I could either. They go back and forth with power moves and the crowd is just dead as possible. NO ONE cares at all, as this was following Michaels and Austin.

Seriously, who thought that was a good idea? The referee goes down and no one cares because it leads nowhere. Bearer yells at Taker to get up and the Nation starts fighting. This would lead to their split into three gangs which no one cared about but the feud got pushed for months anyway. Farrooq slams Taker which is apparently devastating and the arguing distracts him long enough for the tombstone to end this.

Bearer yells at Taker for like 5 minutes until Ahmed comes out to play peacekeeper. Taker gets tired of listening to him so he swings and takes the Plunge. Johnson just leaves and Taker gets up and stalks Bearer to end the show.

Johnson would join the Nation for like a week before getting hurt again and coming back to feud with them AGAIN before leaving for good in January. The Johnson Taker match never happened, which was either due to injury or the name Johnson Taker being copyrighted by Jenna Jameson. It might have been either.

Rating: D-. Seriously, THIS followed Austin and Michaels’ classic. If that was flipped, this would have been a lot better. These two just completely clashed and it was terrible. There was no point to this and nothing was accomplished other than to set up a PPV main event that never happened. In case you were wondering, the WCW PPV main event this month was Savage vs. DDP, falls count anywhere which was a good match. Think about that comparison for a bit.

Overall Rating: D. There’s nothing great here other than one match and then a few decent moments in some bad matches. This was a bad show other than the Austin match as little happened other than to set up two matches at Canadian Stampede. HHH winning meant nothing as he was already about that level and Foley was already over as a face.

Go find Austin vs. Michaels as it’s a great match and completely different from their Mania 14 match. Both are healthy here and it’s amazing to see what they’re capable of in that condition. Other than that, stay far away.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon at:

 

As is usual with me, I started off planning to have about 10 matches on this list and it got out of hand.  These are in NO order other than the top five which will be separated.  This is a mixture of favorites and best which is how my lists tend to go.  Let’s get to it.

1. Sting vs. Vader – Starrcade 1992

If I’m ever in the mood to have fun watching a wrestling match, this is the one I throw on. It’s the rematch from Great American Bash where Vader ripped out the heart of the WCW fans, crushed it in his hand and sprinkled it on a slice of Sting pizza. The rematch is Sting’s revenge and is one of the best fights you will ever see. If you want to see David vs. Goliath and some AMAZING displays of strength from

Sting, go watch this.

1. Sting’s Squadron vs. Dangerous Alliance – WrestleWar 1992

It’s violent, it’s bloody, it’s everything WarGames is supposed to be. This was the BIG blowoff to the amazing Dangerous Alliance feud and there’s almost nothing wrong with it. If you want a GREAT fight with a ton of blood along with Sting, Steve Austin, Rick Rude, Arn Anderson and Ricky Steamboat in the same match, check this one out.

3. Sting vs. Cactus Jack – Beach Blast 1992

First of all, check this show out as it’s excellent. Just make sure that you watch it out of order and put this one last. Anyway, you have two of my top three favorite wrestlers ever in a WAR. This was the culmination of about a year of Cactus torturing Sting and finally Sting gets to fight back. It’s falls count anywhere and according to Foley himself, one of his best matches ever. I love this one.

4. Vader vs. Cactus Jack – Halloween Havoc 1993

Again, take two guys with some hatred for each other and let them beat each other up. This was another great match which I don’t think was for the title. It also led to WCW screwing up what could have been a huge push for Foley, but instead Hogan came in and WCW decided people wanted to see Paul Orndorff and Brutus Beefcake instead of guys like Cactus Jack.

5. Chris Benoit vs. Kevin Sullivan – Great American Bash 1996

Dang I’m in a violent mood tonight. If you’ve never seen this, go watch it. You will hardly ever see a more BRUTAL fight. These two hated each other in real life so you know they enjoyed a chance to beat the tar out of each other for a bit. They did this same match (at one point almost literally spot for spot) for the next year or so but this is by far the best. This is one of Benoit’s best matches ever and definitely his best fight.

As of this point, the rest are in no particular order.

6. Diamond Dallas Page vs. Randy Savage – Spring Stampede 1997

This is the match that made DDP and there’s a great story to it as well. Savage is the grizzled veteran that refuses to take DDP seriously and Page is the guy that won’t give up no matter what he faces. This also showed off how cool the sets were in WCW as the set was a big wild west theme with wagons and bales of hay. You NEVER get that anymore outside of Wrestlemania.

7. Steiner Brothers vs. Lex Luger/Sting – SuperBrawl I

Take four faces, give them no story and let them have a great match. It’s the only thing on this show worth anything at all and it still holds up to this day. The Steiners were untouchable at this point so having two superstars against them was the only conceivable way they could lose. This is also one of the times where Scott got to show off what he could do in the main event.

7. Ricky Steamboat vs. Rick Rude – Beach Blast 1992

Also from the great Beach Blast 92, this is fallout from WrestleWar 1992 with Steamboat wanting to get his hands on Rude and his US Title, but for some reason it wasn’t on the line here. This was a thirty minute iron man match and it has a story going throughout the entire thing. WCW was on fire in 1992 and this was a great match in that year.

9. Brian Pillman vs. Jushin Thunder Liger – SuperBrawl II

Speaking of WCW in 1992, this is the opening match from the first PPV of the year. Later in the big era for WCW they used this same formula: take two small guys and let them go insane for about ten minutes. The crowd had no idea what they were seeing here but they ate it up. It’s easily one of the best opening matches ever if not the best of all time and probably Pillman’s best match ever.

9. Steve Austin vs. Ricky Steamboat – Bash at the Beach 1994

    Seriously, do you not expect these two to be awesome together? Austin was rapidly getting awesome and the best way to do that was through having Steamboat tear the house down with him. Steamboat would get injured before they could really end the feud, but the first match in it was awesome. I’m running out of things to say about these matches.

10. Ric Flair vs. Vader – Starrcade 1993

    So Sid kind of went nuts and stabbed Arn Anderson with a pair of scissors, earning himself a firing right before the biggest show of the year. When all else fails in WCW, get Ric Flair to main event Starrcade. The idea was that Vader was invincible and Flair couldn’t wrestle his usual cerebral style to beat him. Flair’s career was on the line to add some drama and the end result (in North Carolina of course) was a great match with Flair getting another world title.

11. Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero – Halloween Havoc 1997

    Of all the great matches in 1997, this might have been the best in ring match of them all. You take two great wrestlers and let them go at it for almost fifteen minutes in a title vs. mask match. This is all about wowing the crowd and it’s probably both guys’ best match ever. Think about their careers and let that sink in for a bit.

12. Ric Flair vs. Ricky Steamboat – Chi-Town Rumble

    All three matches are great but I always liked the first one best. It’s a faster pace match than the other two and they keep things fast enough to never get boring. Also it helps that this is where Steamboat finally gets his world title after being the best in the world to never be champion. The rematches were great too but I’ve always liked this one better than the other two.

13. Ric Flair vs. Sting – Clash of the Champions #1

    Why WWE.com put the unification match on the list and not this one is likely due to the NWA thing but screw that jazz. If the WWE can say that the World Heavyweight Championship is related to the WCW World Title then I can say this counts. This is the definition of putting someone over with Flair making Sting a huge star in one night. The match runs 45 minutes but feels like about half of that. This is the first of many matches they have and it might actually be the best.

14. Magnum TA vs. Tully Blanchard – Starrcade 1985

    So we have a redneck who wears jeans and the wrestler’s wrestler in a blood feud in an I Quit match. Now this is the story of Bret vs. Shawn but they copied it from this match in the first place. This was another huge feud where the only way to end it was to lock two guys in a box and the first man to quit loses. The ending is legendary with Magnum taking a piece of a wooden chair and driving it into Blanchard’s eye to finally quit, only to hate himself for what he did to win the title.

15. Ric Flair vs. Arn Anderson – Fall Brawl 1995

    They were partners for years but they FINALLY had a match here, in North Carolina of course. This was all part of the rebirth of the Horsemen but it took a few months to get there. They knew each other so well that at the end of the day, you knew they were going to have a great match against each other. The fans had no idea who to cheer for which made it even better. To the surprise of a lot of people, Anderson won in I think their only match ever.

16. Brian Pillman vs. Johnny B. Badd – Fall Brawl 1995

    I don’t think anyone remembers this match but it opens the same show as the previous match. Both guys were on an absolute roll at this point and they were fighting for a title shot. This match runs half an hour and it never once gets boring with the ending being perfect as well. You won’t see this on many lists but it’s an awesome fast paced match that works very well.

17. Bret Hart vs. Chris Benoit – Nitro

    For the Bret Hart fans, this is a must. It’s the Owen Hart Tribute match in the building where he died and it’s by far and away Bret’s best match ever in WCW. It’s also the only match where he was clearly trying for the whole match and there was no stupid story holding him back. This was about two guys putting on a wrestling display and it works to this day. Great match.

18. Ric Flair vs. Barry Windham (pick one)

    Seriously, pick one. These two had so many great matches that you can’t just pick a single one. Windham could have been HUGE if he had kept trying but by 1991 or so he was done. His matches with Flair though were amazing and produced some of the best TV matches you’ll ever see. Barry would eventually join the Horsemen in a spot he was perfect for.

19. Flair vs. Funk – Great American Bash 1989

    The idea here is simple: Funk had injured Flair’s neck and this was about revenge. The problem is that even though Funk was old and mostly retired, you couldn’t quite write him off as a contender to Flair’s title. This is considered the best show WCW ever put on and while I think the show is overrated, the main event is excellent. I’m in the minority that likes it better than the I Quit match but it’s really that good.

20. Sting vs. Rick Rude – Clash of the Champions #17

    We have one of the best heels ever against one of the best faces ever. This is all backstory from earlier in the show as Sting was injured by I believe Luger earlier in the night and was at the hospital. He was told that if he missed the match he would lose the title and the race was on to get back. Rude was sure he was going to be champion but Sting walked through the curtain at the last minute and the place EXPLODED. This is all atmosphere but it was great atmosphere.

21. Dustin Rhodes/Ricky Steamboat vs. The Enforcers – Clash of the Champions #17

    From the same show as the previous match, this is all about the entrance but then the match is awesome on top of it. The Enforcers (Anderson and Zbyszko) had broken Dustin’s partner Barry Windham’s hand at Halloween Havoc so Dustin had a new mystery partner. A guy in a dragon costume came out before revealing himself to be Ricky Steamboat, making his return to the company. Anderson FREAKING and shouting “HE’S JUST A MAN” at Larry to try to convince himself not to panic is great stuff. Oh and the match is great too.

22. Southern Boys vs. Midnight Express – Great American Bash 1990

    Jim Cornette has called this one of the greatest Midnight Express match ever which should sum things up for you. This was another one of those “take two teams, let them go nuts” matches from right before the Express left WCW to form SMW. The Pistols weren’t a great team but when they clicked they could have an excellent match and that’s what they did here.

24. Four Horsemen vs. Sting’s Team – WrestleWar 1991

    WarGames is that one match that you can almost never screw up and this is the second great one. It’s also the only one the Horsemen managed to win I think, which makes their nickname of the Masters of WarGames kind of odd. Anyway, this is a GREAT brawl with everyone beating on everyone and a horrible looking ending with Pillman nearly dying (literally) to end the match. Again, it’s Sting (noticing a theme here) against Flair and it works perfectly.

25. Lex Luger vs. Ric Flair – WrestleWar 1990

    Here’s another great one from these two with Luger substituting for his injured best friend Sting who had been injured at the Horsemen’s hands (not really). The idea is that while it was pretty clear Sting would get to dethrone Flair, Luger gets to beat the tar out of him first. The ending is a mini screwjob but for once it makes perfect sense and is the absolute right finish that hurts no one. This is a great beating and another solid Luger vs. Flair match.

26. Lex Luger vs. Ric Flair – Starrcade 1988

If you ever want to see the Flair Formula worked to perfection, this is the match for you. It’s about 35 minutes long with three separate stages: Flair getting killed, Luger getting beaten up and the finish. These two had one of the hottest feuds of the 80s and this is probably the best match they had in the whole series. Luger should have won the title here and he was branded as a choker because he never got there.