Smackdown – February 11, 2022: They Picked It Up

Smackdown
Date: February 11, 2022
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Corey Graves, Michael Cole

We have less than ten days before Elimination Chamber and the only big thing on the Smackdown side is Goldberg vs. Roman Reigns. That might not sound too appealing, but that’s what the people paying for Elimination Chamber want to see. Other than that, we have the fallout from Ronda Rousey destroying Sonya Deville and choosing to face Charlotte at Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Here is Smackdown if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Ronda Rousey picking Charlotte for Wrestlemania and also taking out Sonya Deville for a bonus.

Here is Sonya Deville, with her arm in a sling, to say she is tired of people disrespecting her. There will be consequences for the actions of people like Ronda Rousey and Naomi. Therefore, she has requested that Rousey be fined $100,000 and suspended indefinitely. Cue Adam Pearce to say Vince McMahon has responded to her request via email.

Said email says that Vince doesn’t like someone abusing their authority, so not only is the request denied, but if Sonya gets involved in Naomi vs. Charlotte, her job will be….IN SERIOUS JEOPARDY. Cue Naomi to say that Sonya can’t touch her, but Naomi can do this. A loud slap drops Sonya, who is not happy.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

We look back at Kofi Kingston/Big E. taking out Los Lotharios in a pretty good match last week.

Big E./Kofi Kingston vs. Los Lotharios

After a quick chat in the back about how great Los Lotharios are and the Los Lotharios Kiss Cam, we’re ready to go. Big E. cranks on a headlock to Angel before Kofi comes in with a splash for two. It’s off to Angel, who takes Kofi into the corner for some crossface shots to the jaw. Humberto adds some forearms to the back but Kingston sweeps his leg out. That’s enough to set up Big E.’s apron splash and there’s the big dive to take Los Lotharios out at the same time.

We come back from a break with Angel pounding on Big E. and TAKING OFF HIS (own) PANTS. Big E. gets up and brings in Kofi as everything breaks down. A top rope double stomp/powerbomb combination gets two on Humberto with Angel making the save. Angel hits a Backstabber and sends Big E. outside for a moonsault (with his leg smacking Big E. in the head). Another moonsault press gives Humberto two on Kofi but he’s back up with Trouble in Paradise. Kofi tries a tornado DDT out of the corner but Garza slips off and stacks Kofi up for the clean pin at 10:24.

Rating: B-. Remember last week when New Day beat Los Lotharios? Well this is the same thing but the opposite, because WWE loves doing this kind of thing. The good thing is that the match worked a little better than their usual efforts, as WWE has a bad tendency to run nothing matches back in a trilogy for some weird reason. Odds are this gets a third try, as the tag division continues to spin its wheels.

The Usos jump the Viking Raiders and leave them laying.

We look back at Goldberg returning and challenging Roman Reigns for Elimination Chamber.

We get a sitdown interview with Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman. Neither of them seem overly worried about Goldberg, with Reigns saying that if he was in WCW when Goldberg had his winning streak, WCW would still be in business. After a clip of Goldberg squashing Brock Lesnar at Survivor Series 2016, Reigns laughs them off as old news. Reigns doesn’t think much of the idea that he and Goldberg were supposed to fight two years ago at Wrestlemania. He wants to slap Goldberg in the face and get him out of here again. Preach it brother.

Recap of Aliyah vs. Natalya, with Aliyah beating her three times in a row.

Aliyah vs. Natalya

Pinfall or submission only. Natalya shoulders her down to start and they dive over each other a few times. A Michinoku Driver gives Natalya two but Aliyah is back with a Thesz press. Natalya shrugs that off and puts on the Sharpshooter, sending Aliyah to the ropes. That has no impact though as there are no disqualifications, meaning Aliyah has to tap at 2:40. So Aliyah beat her and beat her and beat her and then lost. Got it.

Post match Natalya stays on her but Xia Li runs in for the save.

We get a Rock narrated video on Rocky Johnson for Black History Month.

It’s time for InZayn, but first we see Johnny Knoxville wrecking a bunch of Sami Zayn merchandise earlier today. Sami says he’s on to bigger things like getting his Intercontinental Title back, which doesn’t go over so well with the crowd. The booing doesn’t work on a podcast so Zayn promises then vegan creole recipes for later. That brings out his guests, Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura, with Sami promising to take the title last week.

Nakamura asks if Sami saw the movie, meaning Jackass Defeated, which comes out next week. Sami doesn’t think much of Boogs, who can lift all the weights he wants. Boogs reaches for the microphone….and gets electrocuted, sending him down into the corner. Nakamura goes to check on him and gets jumped by Sami, who leaves them both laying. After that live electrocution, we’re ready to move on.

We look back at Drew McIntyre taking out Madcap Moss last week.

Madcap Moss, with a black eye, says he can’t be in Happy Corbin’s corner this week.

Happy Corbin vs. Cesaro

Corbin takes him into the corner to start and starts the pounding. Deep Six cuts off the Cesaro comeback but he sends Corbin into the corner as well. That means the slide under the ropes but they fight to the floor, with Cesaro hitting a running uppercut. Back in and Cesaro hits the springboard corkscrew uppercut for two but Corbin grabs the End of Days at 3:58.

Rating: C. This was a match where they didn’t have a chance to do much and Cesaro was there to make Corbin look good. You need to keep Corbin strong for the Wrestlemania match with Drew McIntyre, because that’s what we’ll be seeing for some reason. Corbin is better without Madcap Moss, but egads I could go for something other than Corbin for McIntyre.

We go to Madcap Moss getting his eye looked at when Drew McIntyre comes in. He knows Moss’ eye is ok, which is why their match at Elimination Chamber is now Falls Count Anywhere.

Charlotte is ready to retain the Women’s Title.

We get a sitdown interview with Goldberg and Michael Cole, who Goldberg says he loves like a brother. Goldberg promises that this is a comeback that will bring back the old him. It’s two years in the making, ten years in the making or fifteen years in the making. Reigns has promised to “Goldberg Goldberg”, but Goldberg promises to make Reigns acknowledge him.

Here’s the opening segment again.

Sheamus was the honorary starter at a NASCAR race.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Naomi

Naomi is challenging and Sonya Deville can’t get involved. Charlotte runs her over to start but Naomi is back up with a whip into the corner. An enziguri sends Charlotte outside and there’s a slingshot corkscrew dive to send us to a break. Back with Naomi in trouble but managing to catch her with a high crossbody for two. The Figure Four necklock is broken up so Charlotte chops away instead. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gives Charlotte two more and she bends Naomi’s back around the post.

Back in and Naomi manages some kicks to the head, setting up a Blockbuster for two more. They head outside with Charlotte sending her into the steps for a crash as we take another break. Back again with Naomi fighting out of a chinlock and hitting another springboard spinning kick to the face. A bulldog drives Charlotte face first into the middle turnbuckle but Charlotte plants her with a powerbomb for two of her own.

The double moonsault hits raised knees though and Naomi hits the Rear View for a very close two. Naomi loads up the split legged moonsault but hits raised knees as well to give Charlotte two more. A (not great) rollup gives Naomi another near fall and she plants Charlotte with a headscissors driver. Now the split legged moonsault connects for two, as the fans are WAY into these near falls. Some forearms have Charlotte in trouble and a kick to the head staggers her again. Another Rear View misses though and the Natural Selection retains the title at 19:50.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but they were rolling by the end, especially after the second break. They had some great near falls with Naomi getting so close to the title before falling short. One of the good things about Charlotte losing her title over and over is that there is a chance she could lose the title here and then get it back to set up the Wrestlemania title match all over again. Heck of a match here and worth a look.

Post match Sonya Deville is here to go after Naomi, with Charlotte coming back in to kick Naomi in the face. The beatdown is on until Ronda Rousey runs in for the save.

Overall Rating: B. They had some good stuff here, with the wrestling being solid for the most part, including a pretty awesome main event. The setback here was the focus on Goldberg vs. Roman Reigns, which isn’t exactly enthralling. At least they kept the Goldberg segment short, because talking really isn’t his thing. The main event really pulled this up, though the bad things kept the show from hitting that much higher level.

Results
Los Lotharios b. Kofi Kingston/Big E. – Rollup to Kingston
Natalya b. Aliyah – Sharpshooter
Happy Corbin b. Cesaro – End of Days
Charlotte b. Naomi – Natural Selection

 

 

 

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Smackdown – February 4, 2022: The Long And Winding Road

Smackdown
Date: February 4, 2022
Location: Paycom Center, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and it’s time to get going on the Road to Wrestlemania. That is going to get going on this show with a pair of big talking points. First up, Paul Heyman will be explaining why he sided with Roman Reigns and Ronda Rousey might be announcing her Wrestlemania opponent. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Brock Lesnar getting screwed out of the WWE Title at the Royal Rumble but then coming back to win the Royal Rumble later in the night. Then he announced that he will be challenging Roman Reigns for the Universal Title at Wrestlemania.

Here is the Bloodline to get things going, complete with a look at Reigns retaining the Universal Title over Seth Rollins at the Royal Rumble. Paul Heyman talks about how there was no plot or plan, because he made a huge mistake by telling Reigns what he thought. He felt that Reigns needed to be protected and he made a mistake. The Coronavirus picked the wrong human to infect and Heyman got Lesnar the WWE Title match. It would leave everyone where they needed to be…except for Heyman when it comes to Reigns.

On Lesnar’s first night as champion, he came to Smackdown and challenged Reigns to a title for title match at Wrestlemania. Heyman says Lesnar was as stupid as he looked because he was stuck with a happy Saskatchewan farmer who wants to take everyone to Suplex City. Then we got to the Royal Rumble, where the Goat slayed the Beast to save Heyman from having to say the same things over and over.

Heyman starts saying the catchphrase but says you will never hear it again. He now realizes the truth: Lesnar needs to be protected from Reigns. Then Reigns offered him the hand of the Bloodline, which is why Heyman handed over the title to smash Lesnar in the face with it. Now there will be no title for title match because Lesnar will acknowledge Roman Reigns, which Heyman demonstrates.

Heyman tells the fans to acknowledge the Tribal Chief…..and it’s Goldberg time. Goldberg comes to the ring and gets straight to the point with the challenge for Elimination Chamber. For the love of all things good and holy, PLEASE DO THE MATCH ALREADY! WWE has been threatening us with this stupid match for two years now so let them do it already and get it out of their system.

Ridge Holland vs. Ricochet

Sheamus and Cesaro are here too. Holland shoulders him down to start but Ricochet flips over him. Another dodge sends Holland outside but he avoids a charge and drops Ricochet face first onto the apron. Holland stops to say something to Sheamus though and it’s a Codebreaker to give Ricochet the pin at 1:50.

Cesaro/Ricochet vs. Ridge Holland/Sheamus

Joined in progress after a break (thankfully without needing to show someone coming out and making the match) with Sheamus hitting the forearms to Cesaro’s chest and then clotheslining him back in. Pat McAfee is holding the Shillelagh as Cesaro fights out of a chinlock and hands it back to Ricochet to pick up the pace.

A springboard forearm sets up a Lionsault for two as everything breaks down. Cesaro rolls Sheamus up for two but charges into a boot in the corner. A dropkick catches Sheamus with a dropkick on top but Holland tags himself in as Sheamus gets superplexed. Northern Grit finishes Cesaro at 2:54 to get his heat back after all of five minutes later.

Jimmy Uso vs. Erik

Preview of the Tag Team Title match at Elimination Chamber because this is how WWE hypes up tag team matches. Erik slips out of a fireman’s carry to start and blasts Jimmy with a knee to the face. Ivar and Jey get into it on the floor, leaving Jimmy to superkick Erik down. The Superfly Splash (with the We The Ones pose in the air) finishes for Jimmy at 1:14 to continue the fast matches and weird booking choices.

We look at Aliyah beating Natalya in three seconds a few weeks ago. Then Natalya beat her up for a DQ in a rematch.

Aliyah vs. Natalya

Aliyah brags about the 3:17 record winning time but gets picked up without much effort. Back up and Aliyah gets in a takedown for some right hands of her own. A Rey Mysterio sitout bulldog gets two, meaning it’s a shocked near fall face. Natalya hits the discus lariat and they head outside. This time Natalya beats her down for a good while, only to get sent into the barricade to give Aliyah the countout win at 2:22.

Here is the returning Drew McIntyre to say he is back. Before he can get very far, here is Happy Corbin for a distraction, but McIntyre pulls the sword out to stop a charging Madcap Moss. McIntyre wants to hear a funny joke about himself, with Moss saying that Wrestlemania is like a criminal who beats the charges: they both get off Scot-free. That earns him a Claymore (McIntyre: “Idiot.”) and McIntyre promises to make Corbin’s life h***.

Sami Zayn crashed the Jackass Forever premiere and got taken out by security. Johnny Knoxville even stabs him with an electric stick.

Zayn complains to Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville about letting that air on television. To calm him down, he gets his Intercontinental Title match in two weeks. Pearce: “Should we invite Johnny Knoxville?” Zayn leaves and it’s Natalya coming in, saying she wants Aliyah next week, pinfall or submission only, Dungeon Style. Deal.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Championship Contenders match and Rick Boogs’ guitar doesn’t work so McAfee dances to the entrance music instead. Boogs and Shanky are here too and here is Sami Zayn to join commentary. Nakamura starts fast with the sliding German suplex but Kinshasa is countered into a fireman’s carry gutbuster for two. Mahal punches him down and we hit the chinlock. The Khallas is broken up and Nakamura kicks him in the face. Kinshasa finishes for Nakamura at 3:14.

Rating: C-. At least they seem to have dropped the idea of Mahal as a thing, which is good news for everyone. Zayn has a good chance of winning the title in two weeks, which will end one of the most under the radar six months reigns since Nakamura’s last under the radar six months reigns. This was your usually dull Mahal match, but that shouldn’t be a surprise these days.

We look at Sonya Deville eliminating Naomi from the Royal Rumble.

Naomi wants Sonya to face her in the ring in five minutes. Sonya says she’s busy so Naomi wants to do it next week. That won’t work either, because Naomi is getting a Smackdown Women’s Title match next week. Naomi doesn’t buy it but Adam Pearce says it’s for real.

Video on Goldberg.

Natalya goes to explain what Dungeon Style means to the bosses (which she couldn’t do when she was in the room with them earlier). Xia Li walks out of the office instead though and Natalya decides to do this later.

New Day vs. Los Lotharios

This is the result of New Day interrupting Los Lotharios’ Valentine’s Day photo shoot. Kofi sends Humberto into the corner to start and rolls him up for two. An Angel distraction lets Humberto get in a cheap shot from behind though and everything breaks down. Kofi gets kicked down and we take a break.

Back with Garza TAKING OFF HIS PANTS and kicking Kingston in the ribs. Angel gets two off a belly to back suplex but Kofi kicks a moonsault out of the air. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house, setting up a wheelbarrow suplex into a top rope bulldog from Kofi….for two as Humberto makes the save. Big E. misses the spear to the floor and gets moonsaulted from the top, setting up a Doomsday dropkick for two on Kofi. The Wing Clipper is broken up and it’s back to Big E. for the Midnight Hour and the pin at 9:43.

Rating: B-. This was a weird one as they did a big false finish which seemed to confuse commentary as well. If nothing else, it’s weird to debut a big move like that and then have it get two, but it was indeed a surprise twist. That being said, it would be nice if WWE did something new with New Day, as you can almost feel the Usos showdown coming.

Here are Charlotte and Sonya Deville for the Ronda Rousey Wrestlemania announcement. Deville says Rousey has picked Becky Lynch for Wrestlemania so Charlotte gets to pick her opponent. Charlotte mocks the idea of facing Ronda, who hasn’t done anything since she lost the title. So pick anyone for Wrestlemania because it doesn’t matter. She’ll pick Sasha Banks, who isn’t even here tonight.

Charlotte wishes Banks was here tonight because Wrestlemania will be the best and worst day of her life. She can come sign the contract….and here is Rousey to interrupt. Rousey won the Rumble and says she gets to pick who she faces at Wrestlemania. She didn’t fly into an ice storm with her baby for a chat though and now Charlotte gets to learn the family business of a beating.

Charlotte isn’t special, but she is first. Rousey will see her at Wrestlemania, so the match is on. Charlotte says the title is her baby and prettier than Rousey’s. The jacket comes off so Sonya tries to break it up and gets caught in the piper’s Pit. Rousey snaps the arm for a bonus. So the Becky vs. Rousey thing was a lie and Charlotte vs. Banks isn’t happening? Why bother mentioning them in the first place then?

Overall Rating: C-. The short wrestling was a bit weird this week but they are clearly starting to move towards Wrestlemania. Elimination Chamber still needs to get done as well though, and that makes for a bit of a weird schedule. I’m rather glad that they’re getting Goldberg vs. Reigns out of the way already, but it could make for a long two weeks on the way there. The rest of the show wasn’t great with very little in the way of quality wrestling, but now we should be cranking it up in the coming weeks.

Results
Ricochet b. Ridge Holland – Codebreaker
Ridge Holland/Sheamus b. Cesaro/Ricochet – Northern Grit to Cesaro
Jimmy Uso b. Erik – Superfly Splash
Aliyah b. Natalya via countout
Shinsuke Nakamura b. Jinder Mahal – Kinshasa
New Day b. Los Lotharios – Midnight Hour to Angel

 

 

 

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Smackdown – January 28, 2022: That Last Push

Smackdown
Date: January 28, 2022
Location: T-Mobile Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and that means it is probably time for the fabled face to face showdown. In this case, that likely means Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins, who just don’t have that much history together. Other than that, we are likely going to get the final push towards tomorrow night. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Charlotte to get things going. She promises to do what Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs will never do: bring a championship to Kansas City! Charlotte promises to win the Royal Rumble on Saturday, where there will be returns and betrayals. There are going to be people fighting and clawing to go to Wrestlemania. Cue Shayna Baszler to interrupt, saying that this is her language. Baszler is going to win, but here is Aliyah to brag about her world record. She is feeling confident, but here is Natalya to interrupt, calling Aliyah delusional and lucky.

Now it’s Shotzi coming in to say she might be able to sneak in and steal the win. Charlotte doesn’t want to hear about this but here is Sasha Banks interrupt. Banks slaps Charlotte in the face and the brawl is on, with Charlotte and Banks being the only two left standing. Banks tosses Charlotte and stands tall, because of course it winds up being two of the Horsewomen.

Ridge Holland is glad to be back and Sheamus knows Holland is just like him. Sheamus even gives Holland his old face guard.

Sheamus/Ridge Holland vs. Cesaro/Ricochet

Sheamus headlocks Cesaro down to start but gets broken up in a hurry. Cesaro sends him outside for a breather but Sheamus walks into a hard clothesline back inside. There’s a double stomp to the ribs and it’s off to Ricochet to work on the arm. Holland comes in and gets knocked all of the place, including a springboard dropkick to the floor. A big flip dive barely connects with Holland (who seemed to be too far off) and we take a break.

Back with Sheamus hitting the Irish Curse on Ricochet and Holland slamming him down. A nasty over the shoulder backbreaker has Ricochet in trouble until he fights out, setting up a springboard moonsault. The double tag brings in Cesaro to beat on Sheamus, including the running uppercut against the barricade on the floor. Back in and Cesaro flips out of an Irish Curse and grabs a small package for two. Ricochet springboards in to dropkick Holland down, allowing Cesaro to hit that modified Angle Slam for two. Holland is back in though and it’s a mask shot to Cesaro. Northern Grit finishes Cesaro at 10:41.

Rating: C+. Well, it was nice to see Ricochet not take a pin for a change and Holland gets a win to move him a bit forward. You can only get him so far with Sheamus getting so many of the falls so this is a nice little boost for Holland. Pretty good match here, with Ricochet getting in his impressive looking high flying, which is almost always the case.

Rumble By The Numbers video.

Naomi vs. Sonya Deville

In the back Sonya tries to influence the referee, who says he’ll be calling this down the line. Feeling out process to start until Sonya knocks her into the ropes for a forearm to the jaw. Sonya hammers away on the mat but Naomi is back with a dropkick hard to the face. That’s broken up as Sonya pulls her to the floor and hits a Nightmare on Helm Street onto the floor as we take a break.

Back with Sonya hitting a spinebuster out of the corner for two, earning the referee a stern lecture. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Naomi is back up with some kicks to the face. A bulldog into the middle buckle sets up a high crossbody (onto Sonya’s face) for two but another one is countered into a shove into the corner. Something like a suplex into a Rock Bottom (basically Matt Morgan’s old Hellevator) gets two on Naomi but she’s back with a Bubba Bomb. The Rear View into the split legged moonsault finishes Deville at 11:39.

Rating: C. It was a good enough match, though I’m not sure if it was quite the huge moment that commentary was selling it as being. Deville is pretty awesome as the evil boss, though I’m not sure where this leaves her going forward. At the same time, is Naomi beating a woman who has barely wrestled in about a year and a half all that impressive? That being said, Naomi getting a win of some kind is a great thing to see after all this time.

Post match Naomi is very happy with her win and promises to win the Rumble. Deville comes back out with the jacket on and enters the match as well.

The Usos don’t like the Viking Raiders, who threaten them with hatchets.

Here is Sami Zayn, who has made some adjustments to In-Zayn. Now it is a talk show (er, live podcast), with Jinder Mahal and Shanky as the first guests. First though, Sami wants to talk about Johnny Knoxville, even though Mahal and Shanky are ready to face Shinsuke Nakamura and Rick Boogs. Zayn keeps going about Knoxville and Jackass, which Mahal says are huge in India. Cue Rick Boogs with his guitar to interrupt, with Shinsuke Nakamura coming in to kick Sami in the head.

Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs vs. Shanky/Jinder Mahal

Joined in progress with Shanky beating on Boogs, who fights up and hits a rather impressive delayed suplex. Back up and Boogs shrugs off some shots in the corner, meaning the comeback is on. Some running shoulders don’t put Shanky down so it’s a running ax handle to finally take him down. The Boogs Cruise finishes Shanky at 2:59.

Kofi Kingston is glad to have Big E. back and they are ready to win the Royal Rumble, because if one of them wins, all of them win.

Madcap Moss/Happy Corbin vs. New Day

Before the match, we get a look at Moss and Corbin injuring Drew McIntyre, which they find rather amusing. Big E. runs Moss over to start and it’s a jumping (over Big E.) backsplash to give Kofi two. Corbin comes in for a running corner clothesline but gets sent outside. That means Kofi can try a dive, only to get pulled out of the air for a rather hard posting as we take a break.

Back with Kofi sliding between Corbin’s legs for the tag off to Big E. Suplexes abound until it’s already back to Kingston, who gets caught in Deep Six. Kofi is able to get back over to the corner though and the hot tag brings in Big E. With Corbin knocked down, the Midnight Hour finishes Moss at 7:02.

Rating: C+. There is always something fun about watching New Day team up and they made it work here again. What matters is that they know how to work well together and they shut up Moss and Corbin for one night. Big E. might be a dark horse for the Royal Rumble and both of them looked good in their warmup here.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Here are Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins for their big showdown. Reigns talks about dishonoring the family, but Rollins points out that Reigns losing to Brock Lesnar must have been a big disappointment. Reigns laughs off talking about the past, but Rollins brings up some of their moments, including Reigns’ thirty day suspension. Finally he gets to splitting up the Shield, which seems to get to Reigns. Rollins says Reigns has done everything, except beat him one on one.

Reigns doesn’t like what Rollins did, and he has moved on, but he will always hate Rollins for what he did to the Shield. This sends Rollins into a rant about how everyone in the family is a joke and tomorrow, it all goes up in smoke. That gets Reigns fired up and he shoves Rollins, only to miss the Superman Punch to end the show. The story was already set and this was just the final showdown before the fight.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was a bit more about the Royal Rumbles themselves and that is a smart way to go. The rest of the card is set so why bother focusing on the rest all that much? I want to see what they have going on in the matches and now we should have a great start to the Road to Wrestlemania. The wrestling was just ok for the most part, but that was not the focal point this week, which is ok with such a big night coming.

Results
Sheamus/Ridge Holland b. Cesaro/Ricochet – Northern Grit to Cesaro
Shinsuke Nakamura/Rock Boogs b. Shanky/Jinder Mahal – Boogs Cruise to Shanky
Naomi b. Sonya Deville – Split legged moonsault
New Day b. Madcap Moss/Happy Corbin – Midnight Hour to Moss

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2015 (2016 Redo): And So, It Begins

Royal Rumble 2015
Date: January 25, 2015
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,164
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Now this is one I’ve been looking forward to and dreading at the same time. I actually didn’t mind the main event the first time around but ever since then I haven’t been able to think of a single good thing that match did. It should be interesting (hopefully) to see how far this thing has fallen in just a year. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. New Day

Talk about a year making a big difference. Cesaro and Kidd looked to be the hottest team in years and now they’re both out while New Day, who looked to be a horrible disaster, actually IS the hottest team in years. As usual, time can change so much in wrestling. As usual, Woods is the odd man out here. Adam Rose is here with Kidd/Cesaro for no adequately explained reason but the fans would rather cheer for Cesaro anyway.

Kidd and Big E. get things going as the announcers talk about the Rumble instead. Ok to be fair, it’s a pre-show tag match with nothing on the line so I can live with it here. Big E. grabs a few backbreakers to start before it’s off to Kofi for two off a dropkick. Cesaro comes in for a BIG reaction and you can tell who the star of this match is going to be.

It’s quickly back to Big E. who takes over with a shoulder in the corner, followed by a middle rope cross body from Kofi. Lawler: “I like New Day but I’m excited to see what they’re going to evolve into.” Cesaro and Kidd take Kofi into the corner and I still don’t get why Rose is on the floor. Like, I don’t remember that in the slightest and it’s bizarre to see a year later. The Cesaro Swing into the dropkick (still awesome) gets two and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro holding Kofi in a chinlock but Kingston comes back with a dropkick to Kidd. Big E. starts cleaning house with clotheslines and the fans are REALLY not pleased. Cesaro charges into a Rock Bottom (well close enough to one) out of the corner for two. Kidd is sent to the floor for a flip dive from Kofi, followed by Big E. spearing Cesaro through the ropes for a big crash.

It’s Cesaro on his own against both guys but Big E. is sent outside and Kofi gets kicked in the head, setting up a superplex into a springboard elbow from Kidd for a VERY close two. A sunset flip gets two on Kofi with Cesaro holding Kidd in place for a smart move. Trouble in Paradise is countered into the Sharpshooter but Big E. makes the save with a belly to belly. Rose gets on the apron and gets kicked in the head, only to have Kidd grab a fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin on Kofi at 11:03.

Rating: B-. Well that worked. This is why having a hot tag division is so important: you can wake up the crowd in a match that really doesn’t matter either way because both teams looked great. New Day could clearly go in the ring but it would still be a few months before they really figured it out. Well that and until they were allowed to have some personality, which was the cure all along.

The opening video is about finding the moment that cements what you are. However, there can only be one. Tonight, someone’s moment becomes a reality. The triple threat gets a little attention as well.

New Age Outlaws vs. Ascension

This is fallout from the Outlaws, the NWO and Acolytes beating down the Ascension for not respecting the veterans enough or something. Yeah it ruined another act that was built up for over a year in NXT but HHH’s buddies got a pay per view appearance out of it. Gunn and Viktor get things going and all it takes is a hiptoss to draw the YOU STILL GOT IT chant. Fans get easier to impress every year. Dogg comes in for the shaky knee drop on Konnor but the young guys take over with a chinlock.

As the match slows down (likely so the Outlaws can breathe), JBL regales us with tales of Bullet Bob Armstrong vs. Buddy Colt. Konnor puts on a chinlock and Dogg taps, likely because tapping out wasn’t a thing when he started. The match keeps going anyway with Dogg avoiding an elbow drop, only to be chinlocked down by Viktor. That goes nowhere and the hot tag brings in Billy to clean house, only to miss the Fameasser and walk into the Fall of Man for the pin at 5:26.

Rating: D. And of course this launched the Ascension up the card and into the Tag Team Title scene forevermore. Yeah of course they never recovered after getting beaten down by a bunch of old retired guys and then winning a meaningless match against a long past retired team because…..yeah I think you know why this didn’t work, or at least you should.

We look at Sting saving Cena from Big Show/Kane/Seth Rollins on Raw. Sting isn’t on the show or anything but he had a cameo there of course. Cena winning however did get Dolph Ziggler, Ryback and Erick Rowan their jobs back but Rowan didn’t qualify for the Rumble. At least the match meant something.

The Authority isn’t pleased with Sting doing that WCW nonsense around here. Cue Paul Heyman who says Brock can help with their problems, whatever those are.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Damien Mizdow/Miz

The Usos are defending but Mizdow is the most over guy in the match. Speaking of things that have changed a lot in a year. The Usos took the titles from Miz/Mizdow to close out 2014 so this is the rematch. Jey and Miz get things going and the fans already want Mizdow. Something like a top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two on Miz as Cole recap Miz trying to get Naomi on their side with promises of Hollywood fame.

Miz gets crotched on top so Mizdow (gently) does the same, continuing the one idea act that somehow had fans cheering for him. Miz’s top rope ax handle is punched out of the air so Mizdow goes up and dives into a punch from no one. The fans think Mizdow is awesome, meaning it’s time for a chinlock from Miz himself. The Reality Check gets two but Miz won’t tag Mizdow in. Again, this doesn’t make a ton of sense as Miz is making himself wrestle the whole match by himself.

Anyway, Jimmy gets away and tags in Jey to take over with the running Umaga Attack in the corner but Miz grabs a DDT for two. Everything breaks down and both Usos hit a dive to take out both challengers, though Jey almost misses Miz, drawing a rather rude chant from the fans.

Back in and Jey misses the Superfly Splash, allowing Miz to get two off the Skull Crushing Finale. The second attempt at the Splash connects but Mizdow breaks it up, drawing the loudest pop you will EVER hear for a heel breaking up a cover. Mizdow’s Skull Crushing Finale gets two on Jimmy, who superkicks Miz into a powerbomb from Jey. Jimmy’s Superfly Splash retains the titles at 9:20.

Rating: C-. Nothing special here as Miz/Mizdow’s one joke is long past its point of interest and we’re just waiting on Mizdow to turn, which would of course take too long to mean anything as WWE would screw it up again. It really is amazing how far the tag division has fallen in just a year as all the injuries and screwiness have turned the division on its head. The Usos are still the Usos though and that’s all that matters.

The pre-show panel chats a bit and we look at the pre-show match.

J&J Security play the new WWE mobile game until Seth Rollins comes in to yell at them for not being serious enough. Rollins says he’s been called the future but he’s the right now.

Wrestlemania ad. I had forgotten how much I hated that theme song.

Bella Twins vs. Paige/Natalya

No idea what the story here is but I’m sure it’s Total Divas related. Nikki and Paige get things going with Paige not being able to Irish whip her. It’s off to Natalya who gets two off a kick to the back of the head. Brie comes in to work on the arm as the announcers joke about which twin is older. I’m not sure why this is supposed to be funny but they certainly think it is. A double suplex puts Brie down and Paige does her slow, crawling cover for two.

Natalya comes in and covers as well but for some reason she isn’t legal. Even Paige is confused as she grabs Brie again and now tags Natalya in all legal like. Brie gets two off a quick slam and it’s back to Nikki for a Hennig neck snap. Lawler: “Name two countries and then a state.” Cole: “It was a joke.” It’s as random as it sounds. Now it’s off to Lawler approving of the Bellas’ looks as they take turns on Natalya for some near falls.

Brie puts on a chinlock for a bit before both Bellas grab a leg and roll forward to flip Natalya onto the back of her head. Nikki puts on a headscissors and does push-ups to drive Natalya’s face mere inches away from the mat. Natalya powers up and drops Nikki on her back for the break and avoids a clothesline, only to have Brie pull Paige off the apron. Nikki’s big forearm puts Natalya away at 8:02.

Rating: D. We don’t even have time for a hot tag? This wasn’t much to see but again, it’s all about the Bellas because they’re the stars on Total Divas and know how to act like the Kardashians or whatever. Nikki would get a lot better after another six months on top of the division or so, but that would be a very long six months.

Roman Reigns says he’ll beat his performance from last year.

Stardust does his usual and Goldust says he’s right.

Rusev says he’ll win and promises to crush whoever wins.

Miz says this is his year and Mizdow repeats everything. Again: that’s not what a stunt double does.

Big Show says he’s not mortal because he’s a giant.

Fandango says no one understands the power of the tango.

YES, Daniel Bryan thinks he can get back to the main event of Wrestlemania.

We recap the triple threat for the World Title. Rollins tried to cash in Money in the Bank on Lesnar at Night of Champions while Cena was challenging, triggering a feud between Rollins and Cena. Tonight they both get their shot in what should be awesome.

WWE World Title: John Cena vs. Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and this is one fall to a finish. The fans just explode on Cena with the JOHN CENA SUCKS song making its return. I was there when it debuted and that’s a pure thing of brilliance. Lesnar on the other hand is treated…..well about how you would expect Philadelphia to react to him. Rollins bails to start and there’s the first German suplex to Cena. Another one drops Cena again so J&J come in, only to get a German of their own.

Rollins kicks Cena in the head but gets pulled inside to face Brock all alone. It’s time for more German suplexes and the fans loudly applaud. There’s a regular suplex to Rollins and we get an ECW chant. Brock grabs a Kimura on Cena but John lifts him up, allowing Seth to springboard in with a knee to the champ. Cena and Rollins get smart and double team Lesnar, only to have Seth throw John to the floor for one off an AA.

Brock pops up like a daisy and sends both of them outside, only to have Rollins knock him into the steps. As J&J are in a heap next to the barricade, Cena starts his usual finishing sequence on Rollins but Lesnar breaks up the Shuffle with another German suplex. Seth breaks up the rolling Germans though as he needs Cena to help fight against Brock. Makes sense. A knee to the back puts Brock on the floor but the champ is right back in for the save as Seth covers Cena.

Back up and Cena throws Rollins to the floor and actually drops Brock with some clotheslines. Seth pulls Cena outside and tries a springboard, only to get caught in a big F5. That is some terrifying strength. Brock loads up a table for some reason so Cena gives him three straight AA’s for two with Rollins making a last second save. There’s a Curb Stomp from Seth and this time Cena has to dive in and break up the cover. The fans think this is awesome (indeed) as everyone heads outside, where Cena spears Lesnar through the barricade.

Brock keeps getting up so Cena throws him into the steps and blasts him in the face for good measure, knocking the champ onto the announcers’ table. Rollins feels left out so he drives Brock through with a HUGE top rope elbow and Cena is the only one standing. The non-Lesnars head back inside and Seth hits a quick low superkick for two. The AA doesn’t work so Cena Batista Bombs him for a VERY near fall.

Not to be outdone, Rollins reverses a superplex attempt into a running Buckle Bomb for two more. Both guys are spent so Rollins tries a Curb Stomp, only to get caught in the STF. Cue J&J from their comas for the save as a stretcher comes out for Brock. There’s a TripleBomb for two on Cena but he ducks a briefcase shot and AA’s both J’s at the same time. He should not be able to do that twenty minutes into a match this physical. Or any match for that matter.

Another AA gets two on Rollins and the Curb Stomp gets the same on Cena as the fans are freaking out on these kickouts. We’re told Brock has at least a broken rib as Rollins busts out the Phoenix Splash on Cena. Not that it matters as a TICKED OFF Brock gets back in for some German suplexes, only to have Seth hit him in the face with the briefcase. Rollins loads up a Curb Stomp onto the case but you don’t try that on Lesnar, as he counters with a HUGE F5 to retain at 22:42.

Rating: A. Good grief what a battle. This was the night where Rollins became a star and people knew that he was going to be champion soon. Cena put in his normal amazing performance here as well, but good night Brock looked like a monster. This is the beast that WWE wanted to build up for someone to take down and it worked perfectly here. Just outstanding action here with all three looking like they had been through a war. This was the instant match of the year leader and it would take something special to knock it off.

Brock walks off as the medics are stunned.

Rumble By The Numbers video.

Royal Rumble

Good luck following that. Miz is #1 and R-Truth is #2 with 90 second intervals. They start slowly (smart here) until Truth gets in a few pelvic thrusts. Truth is sent to the apron a few times and gets crotched on the top until Bubba Ray Dudley makes a big surprise return at #3. You think that might wake the Philadelphia fans up a bit? Bubba is fired up to start and gives Miz the Dusty punches before R-Truth plays D-Von (I’m not touching that one) on What’s Up.

Now it’s table time but Miz gets up, only to be put back down with a 3D. There go Miz and Truth as Luke Harper is in at #4 for a hoss fight. They slug it out boo/yay style but Harper elbows out of a Bubba Bomb. A big clothesline drops Harper but Bray Wyatt is in at #5. Bubba isn’t sure what to make of him and Bray does his big freaky smile. The fans want D-Von (fair enough idea) but Bray sends Bubba into a clothesline and dumps him a few seconds later.

Harper and Wyatt stare at each other and Curtis Axel is in at #6, only to have Erick Rowan jump him from behind and destroy him, kicking off Axelmania because Axel was never officially eliminated. Rowan (not part of the Family at this point) gets in and teases a reunion against Bray, only to be quickly double teamed. Erick almost gets Harper out but Bray dumps them both and points to the sign. In another surprise return, the Boogeyman is in at #7. Cole: “It’s the eater of worlds against the eater of worms!” His entrance takes forever and Bray dumps him like the jobber that he is.

Sin Cara is in at #8 and gets in a few shots, only to get punched out of the air. Sister Abigail sets up another elimination and Bray is on a roll. With no one to fight, Bray grabs a mic and issues an open challenge to everyone in the back because this is his year. It’s time to sing until Zack Ryder is in at #9 (apparently returning from shoulder surgery), only to be eliminated even faster than Cara.

NOW things get interesting as Daniel Bryan is in at #10 to one of the loudest reactions you’ll hear since…..well since the last time Bryan was in a big match probably. Daniel speeds things up a lot with some running dropkicks in the corner as JBL tells Bryan not to go so hard because he needs to pace himself. Preach it JBL. A middle rope hurricanrana puts Bray down and it’s Fandango in at #11. Well that’s quite the drop in star power. He goes after Bryan but stops to dance, allowing Bryan to flip out of a belly to back suplex.

We go old school (way old school actually) with an airplane spin until Tyson Kidd (with his sweet theme song) is in at #12. A springboard missile dropkick drops Bryan and Fandango is quickly dropped into the corner, leaving Kidd and Bryan to slug it out in what could rock with about fifteen minutes. Stardust is in at #13, with Cole saying it’s his Rumble debut. No Cole, no it’s not. I get what he’s going for and no Cole, no it’s not.

Fandango and Stardust take turns skinning the cat before Stardust takes out the knee to get Fandango in trouble. Bryan eliminates Kidd but Bray is back up, only to be knocked through the ropes and out to the floor. You know that means a suicide dive from Daniel, followed by Diamond Dallas Page in at #14 for another surprise. Stardust is right on him but there’s the first Diamond Cutter. JBL: “Do they teach that in yoga class?”

Fandango takes Page down but gets crotched on top, setting up a super Diamond Cutter for a very nice pop. Bray pounds on Page but takes a Diamond Cutter of his own, which is one step too far. The guy is a monster and shouldn’t get dropped by a retired legend. Rusev comes in at #15 and superkicks Page before eliminating him. Side note: put Page in the Hall of Fame already. He has the resume and he’s worthy of canonization after what he accomplished with Roberts and Hall.

Rusev dumps Fandango and puts Bryan on the apron, allowing Bray to knock Daniel out. That right there is pretty much it for this Rumble meaning anything as we now know it’s all about Reigns, even though the fans aren’t going to be interested no matter what. I know you can’t have Bryan win here, but you could at least give him a run near the end. This was a bad idea and the DANIEL BRYAN chants starting up a minute after he’s gone don’t bode well for the rest of the show.

Goldust is in at #16, giving us Goldust, Stardust, Rusev and Wyatt. The brothers go after each other for a bit until Kofi Kingston is in at #17. Kofi goes after Bray as the fans are booing everything presented to them no matter how watchable it is. All five wind up in one corner for some reason with no eliminations until Adam Rose is in at #18. The Rosebuds do the full entrance and catch Kofi as he’s launched over the top for his annual save. Rusev dumps Rose with ease and kicks Kofi out a few seconds later to get us back to four. Roman Reigns is in at #19 and oh man this is going to be good.

The fans go nuts on Reigns as he fires off the running corner clotheslines and gets rid of Goldust and Stardust in rapid succession. Big E. is in at #20 and only gets kind of booed. Rusev is right on him and that gets booed loudly out of pure spite. Rusev hits a quick Cannonball on Big E. and it’s Damien Mizdow in at #21 for a bit of relief from the fans. Miz cuts him off and wants the spot but Reigns shoves him down and Damien, egged on by the crowd, goes in as well.

Mizdow cleans some house but is thrown out by Rusev in less than twenty seconds. Dang they really don’t want the fans to cheer anything tonight do they? Well other than Reigns of course. Jack Swagger is in at #22 and gets in a few nice shots until Bray cuts him off. We’ve got Wyatt, Swagger, Reigns, Big E. and Rusev at the moment until Ryback is in at #23. That means more power brawling with Meat Hooks and suplexes all around. Bray and Rusev continue their loose alliance to to get Ryback in trouble and there’s a CM Punk chant for the latest false hope.

Kane is in at #24 and you know the people aren’t happy with that. The match slows down a bit with Kane putting Ryback on the apron and Big E. doing the same thing to Swagger. Those attempts go as far as you would expect and it’s Dean Ambrose in at #25 to give the fans something to actually cheer for. Dean goes for Rusev to start but has to stop a charging Kane. The fans are WAY into Ambrose as he’s the first guy they’ve wanted to cheer for in about fifteen minutes.

Titus O’Neil is in at #26 and put out in four seconds by Ambrose and Reigns. So much for that one. The ring is getting too full and Intercontinental Champion Bad News Barrett makes it even worse at lucky #27. Everyone brawls against the ropes until it’s Cesaro in at #28. Cesaro fires off a bunch of European uppercuts but he can only get Ambrose to the apron. Rusev dropkicks Big E. out to clear a little room but Big Show takes his place at #29.

Everyone goes after him but Show throws them away before starting a chokeslam contest with Kane. There goes Ryback thanks to both giants and Show dumps Swagger. A chokeslam sends Rusev rolling out under the ropes and it’s Dolph Ziggler in at #30 (Remember when “who is #30” was the big question every year? Now it’s just another entrant. It’s kind of sad really.), giving us a final grouping of Wyatt, Rusev, Reigns, Kane, Ambrose, Barrett, Cesaro, Big Show and Ziggler.

Here’s the thing: that’s actually a stacked final set of people. Wyatt, Rusev, Ambrose, Barrett, Cesaro and Ziggler are crowd favorites, Big Show and Kane are at least good monsters to conquer and Reigns is…..well that other group is really popular. The problem here is NO ONE but Reigns has a chance and the entire audience knows it, making this inevitable rather than anything interesting.

Ziggler superkicks the giants and takes them both down with the running DDT. Barrett is sent to the apron and superkicked out but Ziggler gets caught in the Cesaro Swing. Cesaro sends him to the apron but Dolph gets him to the apron for a superkick and an elimination, only to have Big Show and Kane put Ziggler out. That also gives Kane the all time record for Rumble eliminations.

The giants throw Bray out like he’s no one (thanks for the 47 minutes Bray) and the fans are getting even angrier than they already were. So it’s Ambrose/Reigns vs. Big Show/Kane with Rusev forgotten on the floor. Roman is bleeding from the mouth as he clotheslines Show down but he and Dean can’t get rid of the bigger giant. Kane boots Roman in the face and the KO Punch knocks Dean silly, giving the giants an easy elimination. Reigns is suddenly even less popular as the inevitability gets that much closer. Even Cole acknowledges that the fans hate this.

Reigns fights back and the booing gets even louder until Kane and Show start fighting, because the last SIXTEEN YEARS of these two fighting isn’t enough. They fight next to the ropes and Reigns gets up for a double elimination, actually sending the fans into silence for the win.

Kane and Big Show get back in and beat Roman down even more, complete with a double chokeslam. The fans remember that Rusev is still in but here’s the Rock to help save his cousin. He cleans house and drops both giants to a nice reaction until Reigns Superman Punches Show into a Rock Bottom. Rock leaves and Rusev gets back in, only to get speared and eliminated to really give Roman the win at 59:31.

Rating: D-. WOW. This is somehow so much worse than I remember it as WWE was clearly going out of its way to clear the path for Roman but the fans were having none of it. The problem here is a simple one: there was never any drama. Look back at 2012 for a second. The final two were Chris Jericho and Sheamus, neither of whom were interesting choices to win. However, the final three minutes of that match are AWESOME as you really didn’t know who was going to win and both guys had a real chance. That’s the easiest way to get fans to like the Rumble, or really most matches.

This Rumble is really more like 1993 than anything else. That was the year of Yokozuna and everyone knew it, though there was the slightest chance of the Undertaker winning it. However, Undertaker went out in the middle of the match and the rest was just a waiting game to see who was on Yokozuna’s victim list.

That’s exactly what happened here. Everyone knew Reigns was the heavy favorite no matter who they wanted to win and the ONLY person with a real chance of beating him was Bryan. This year Bryan was the twelfth man eliminated, leaving about thirty five minutes left in the match. That’s a long time for the fans to sit around with little to no hope as things get worse and worse. The best false hope they had for the rest of the match was Ambrose and that just wasn’t going to happen.

On top of that, you have Big Show and Kane as the big bads for Reigns to conquer. That’s fine on paper, until you look at all the papers labeled “Raw Results” where you see how many times he and everyone else has beaten both of them. Instead of some group of the popular guys at the end, it was Kane and Big Show for the first ending. Then there’s Rusev for the false hope spot but Reigns destroyed him too before winning.

So yeah, this was one big mess all designed for Reigns to look like a hero and it failed miserably. It boils down to a simple concept that actually takes me back to the Russo days to a degree: you have to earn it. The problem here is Reigns hasn’t really accomplished anything to earn this spot and the fans are rejecting him. Austin dominating the 1998 Rumble worked because the fans had seen Austin go through a lot of wars to earn the right to be the top dog. Reigns’ big moment was a win over Randy Orton at Summerslam 2014. That’s not exactly huge and the fans hadn’t forgotten.

Ignoring the Reigns part for a minute, this was a really dull match. Bubba was a cool surprise and Page was good for a Diamond Cutter, but Boogeyman? Other than that and Bray’s dominance (which went nowhere), this was really dull stuff. Kofi being caught by the Rosebuds was a good quick chuckle but really low on his list of saves. Just a horrible Rumble from start to finish with only a few bright spots throughout.

Rock poses with Reigns and the fans STILL boo. The Authority comes out to glare a lot as Reigns celebrates and points at the sign to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Oh yeah this was bad. The triple threat is the only thing keeping this from being a disaster as the rest of the card is a bunch of nothing tags and then a disaster of a Rumble for the last third. The Rumble itself really is that bad and drags an already bad show down even lower. It’s balanced out a bit by the triple threat but twenty two minutes of awesome can’t make up for an hour of horrible. Terrible show here and thankfully WWE finally figured out that Reigns wasn’t ready yet, because he just wasn’t here.

Ratings Comparison

Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. New Day

Original: B

Redo: B-

Ascension vs. New Age Outlaws

Original: D+

Redo: D

Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Usos

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Bella Twins vs. Paige/Natalya

Original: D-

Redo: D

Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Original: A

Redo: A

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: D

How in the world did I add that one up last year?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/01/25/royal-rumble-2015-more-teasing-than-a-15-year-old-on-prom-night/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2013 (2014 Redo): Setting Up The Sequel

Royal Rumble 2013
Date: January 27, 2013
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 13,00
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This show was only a year ago and I can barely remember anything about it. Aside from the Rumble the big matches are the Rock challenging CM Punk for the WWE Title in the most obvious ending ever and Alberto Del Rio defending his newly won World Heavyweight Championship against Big Show in a last man standing match. Other than that we’ve only got HELL NO vs. the Rhodes Scholars to complete the card. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro

Cesaro is defending. This is just after Flair passed the Figure Four to Miz, starting the worst period of his career. Miz grabs a headlock to start and gets two off an elbow to the jaw. The headlock takes Cesaro down to the mat but he fights up and grabs one of his own. Back up and Miz tries a leapfrog but gets caught in midair with a tikt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. The champion takes over and cranks on both of Miz’s arms before getting two off a Michinoku Driver.

A hard European uppercut sets up the gutwrench suplex for two and it’s back to the double arm. Back up again and Miz slips out of a slam and hooks the Reality Check for two. There’s the running clothesline in the corner and Miz goes up but hurts his knee on the top rope ax handle. Cesaro gets caught with his feet on the ropes, allowing Miz to get two off a rollup. Antonio misses a running knee in the corner but is still able to roll away from the Figure Four. Cesar takes him to the floor and rams Miz into the metal underneath the ring. Miz is out cold so Cesaro Neutralizes him for the pin to retain.

Rating: D+. Miz just doesn’t work in a lot of these matches and the Figure Four doesn’t work in the slightest. Thankfully he wouldn’t be featured very prominently for awhile as there was just nothing to him for the most part. Cesaro still needs to get a push as he’s more talented and marketable than half the roster but instead we get people like Miz.

The opening video is about time passing and how no one has enough. This ties into Punk’s time as champion with Rock saying the reign ends tonight.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio

Last man standing match, which is a rematch with the same stipulations from when Alberto won the title a few weeks ago. Del Rio turned the announce table on top of Big Show so Big Show turned it on top of him a few weeks later. Alberto is shown in the back and he runs into Bret Hart for no apparent reason whatsoever. Bret says Alberto reminds him of a Mexican version of himself. Alberto calls Bret a Canadian Del Rio and Ricardo gushes, earning him Bret’s sunglasses. What a bizarre cameo.

Some hard chops have Del Rio in early trouble and a slam gets a five count. Alberto chops away but jumps off the middle rope right into a chop to change control right back. The champion dropkicks the giant’s knee out but the low superkick actually knocks Big Show up from his knees to his feet. A hurricanrana and a seated senton put Big Show down and Alberto gets a breather. It’s amazing how much more intersting Del Rio is by doing this lucha stuff instead of his arm work. The arm stuff is good but this is such a nice change of pace.

Big Show blocks the armbreaker with one arm and slams Del Rio down, sending him outside. Del Rio gets back in as Big Show gets a chair but the champion dropkicks him in the ribs to knock it out of his hands. A series of chair shots (crowd: “SI! SI! SI!”) has Big Show down but Alberto dives into a chokeslam for an eight count. We head outside again with Del Rio getting chopped to the floor with ease. This is a very slow paced match so far.

A pair of low blows puts Big Show down in the aisle but he’s up at nine. Show hits something resembling a DDT on the floor before sending Del Rio into the set. He rips a piece of the set, resembling a light tube, and blasts Del Rio over the back. Since this is WWE there’s a table readily available and Big Show takes the champion on top of the set for a chokeslam through the table. The bump looked awesome but he’s again on his feet at nine.

The beating takes Del Rio back to the ring and Show loads up the WMD. Alberto sees it coming and rolls outside, only to have Big Show throw Ricardo around for fun. Big Show misses a charge through the barricade (clearly heavily padded) for five but a long series of chair shots has him down again. Del Rio crushes the arm between the steps and a chair, but Alberto follows up with a fire extinguisher blast to the face for no apparent reason. Back in and the armbreaker goes on, but Ricardo ups the ante by duct taping Big Show’s legs to the ropes. The giant can’t get up and Alberto retains the title.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t the worst match in the world but it was very slowly paced and the ending made Del Rio look more clever than tough. It also doesn’t help that the match was the same gimmick they did less than a month ago. Face Alberto was a nice guy but they cut the cord just six months after this. Not bad, but Del Rio winning the title here would have been much better.

Send Slim Jims to the military!

Ziggler isn’t worried about being in the Rumble and AJ threatens Matt Striker with Big E. Langston for implying Ziggler can’t win. Langston does one of the most mind blowing imitations of an annoying reporter while asking Ziggler for his thoughts on the main event. Dolph has little of note to say but no one was hearing him after Big E.’s bit anyway.

Cesaro says he’ll continue the streak of non-Americans winning the Rumble.

The Prime Time Players……WE’RE GETTING RUMBLE PROMOS!!!! Anyway they say anyone that thinks they’ll eliminate either of them is getting a penalty flag.

Orton says he’s perfect for the Rumble because it’s every man for himself.

Cena is ready for the Rumble because it means he can be champion again.

Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett says he’ll restore credability to the Rumble.

Sheamus says he won the Rumble last year and he’ll do it again tonight.

Ryback isn’t any catchphrase and he doesn’t eat Fruity Pebbles, but he’ll see food every 90 seconds. Feed him more.

We recap Miz vs. Cesaro on the pre-show.

Tag Titles: HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

The Scholars are challenging. Cody kicks Bryan in the ribs as Cole references Queen lyrics. Bryan spins out of a wristlock and the fans chant for Cody’s mustache. Cody’s leapfrog is countered into a surfboard and it’s off to Kane for a low dropkick and a two count. Rhodes scores with a dropkick of his own and drives Kane into the corner for the tag off to Sandow. Kane easily powers Sandow into the corner because, you know, he’s Damien Sandow and it’s off to Bryan for the YES Kicks.

JBL rants about Cole and Lawler hugging as Kane kicks Sandow in the face, knocking him out to the floor. The FLYING GOAT takes out the challengers but Cody low bridges Bryan to the floor to take over. Back in and a half crab has Daniel in trouble but he reverses into a small package to escape. Damien comes in again and drops an elbow for two before dropping the Wind-Up Elbow.

After some knees to the back it’s Cody in again but he charges into a boot in the corner. Sandow breaks up a hot tag attempt and Cody puts Bryan in an over the shoulder backbreaker. Daniel slides down to escape and makes the tag to Kane. Sandow is tossed around like a rag doll but a Cody distraction prevents the top rope clothesline. Kane grabs both guys by the throat and Bryan tags himself in. The Scholars double suplex Kane but Bryan shoves Cody into a chokeslam and Daniel YES Locks Sandow to retain.

Rating: C. Nothing you wouldn’t see on Raw around this time which means it was fine. The Scholars were a nice idea for a team but it was clear that they had no chance at this point given how low their individual stocks were. Kane and Bryan gelled perfectly well as a team and Bryan would get far bigger very soon.

Rumble By The Numbers which I’ve typed many times already.

HELL NO celebrates in the back when Vickie Guerrero comes up and gives them their Rumble numbers. Daniel shows Kane his but Kane won’t show Bryan. This leads to penis jokes.

We look at the Royal Rumble Fan Fest which is another name for Axxess. This included a tournament of NXT wrestlers for a spot in the Rumble, won by Bo Dallas.

Royal Rumble

Ziggler is #1 which he picked (the other option was #2) after winning a Beat the Clock Challenge on Raw. Dolph says he’ll win and doesn’t care who he faces first, bringing out a returning Chris Jericho at #2. This was a complete shock and the roof is blown off the building. Also remember that Ziggler beat Jericho to send him out of the company to give us some history. The clock is at 90 seconds between entrants this year.

Jericho is quickly sent to the apron but comes back with a top rope ax handle. Now it’s Dolph on the apron as the fans tell Jericho he still has it. When did Jericho ever come close to losing it? A superplex brings Ziggler back into the ring and Cody Rhodes is in at #3. Jericho hammers away on him but Ziggler gets in a cheap shot as the double teaming begins. Chris knocks Ziggler down and puts Cody in the Walls but Dolph makes the save.

Dolph catapults Jericho throat first into the bottom rope as Kofi Kingston is in at #4. Kofi immediately speeds things up and pounds away on Cody but can’t hit Ziggy with Trouble in Paradise. Ziggler is thrown to the apron and all four guys try to eliminate each other at the same time in the same spot. Santino Marella is #5 and he sends all four to the apron before loading up the Cobra. Everybody is back in and even though Santino takes Kofi down with the sock, it’s Cody backdropping Marella out.

Drew McIntyre of 3MB is #6 and gets to fight Kofi as everyone else takes a breather. Back up and it’s time to lay on the ropes while trying to eliminate people. Jericho is sent over the ropes but he keeps his feet off the ground and gets back in. Titus O’Neil is in at #7 to add some power, including taking Cody and Kofi down with a double clothesline. Cole finally tells us that the bark is a shout out to his fraternity from Florida. Thank you for explaining that to us after two years.

Jericho throws out McIntyre but can’t do the same to Ziggler as Goldust is #8. Cody gets ready for the showdown and the fans are WAY into this. They trade the kneeling uppercuts and Goldie stomps on Cody for a bit. The fans chant for Goldust and it’s David Otunga (remember him?) is in at #9. The announcers ignore the match to talk about the commentators being in the Rumble last year as people start to pair off.

Nothing much happens until Heath Slater is in at #10. That gives us Ziggler, Jericho, Rhodes, Kingston, O’Neil, Goldust, Otunga and Slater at the moment. Slater fires off right hands to Kofi as Jericho calls spots to Ziggler. Dolph gets stuck on the apron again and Sheamus is #11 to clear out some bodies. He destroys everyone with his usual stuff before sending Titus to the apron for the ten forearms. Otunga is thrown onto Titus to get rid of O’Neil before ten forearms and a Brogue Kick get rid of the lawyer. Tensai, still the Japanese lunkhead, is #12.

Everybody goes after Tensai to make a big cluster in the corner. That goes nowhere at all so Brodus Clay comes in at #13. We get a Tons of Funk preview before Goldust backdrops Cody to the apron, only to get pulled to the apron as well. Cody gets back in and sends Goldust into the post for the elimination and a lot of booing. Rey Mysterio is #14 to make the crowd happy again. Ziggler and Jericho get quick 619s and the top rope splash crushes Jericho. Things slow down a bit until we reach the halfway point with Darren Young at #15.

A bunch of guys join forces to dump Brodus and Kofi puts out Tensai a few seconds later. Now we get to the part that everybody was waiting on as Kofi is knocked off the apron, only to land on Tensai’s back. He jumps onto the announcers’ table as he tries to figure this out. Why he doesn’t just jump two feet to get onto the steps is beyond me. Bo Dallas is #16 as this is going on. Instead of the steps, Kofi gets JBL’s office chair and pogos his way back to the ring. Kingston pulls Darren out of the ring but gets caught with the Disaster Kick for the elimination before he can get back inside.

Godfather gives us the nostalgia pop at #17 and is dropkicked out by Ziggler four seconds later. He seems ok with that and leaves with his women. The whole point was the entrance anyway so I have no issue with that. Wade Barrett is in at #18 as the ring is getting too full. Everything slows down again and John Cena is #19 to clear out some tired people. Everybody gets ready for him so Cena comes a charging. John fights them all off and throws out Slater and Cody but can’t dump Jericho.

Damien Sandow is #20, giving us Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Mysterio, Dallas, Barrett, Cena and Sandow. Mysteiro and Barrett fight to the apron and a big forearm puts Rey out. Sheamus goes right after Wade as Jericho tries to put Cena in the Walls. Daniel Bryan is #21 and fires off kicks to Sandow. Now it’s Barrett getting the kicks as everyone else is down. Sheamus and Bryan try to put Jericho out but he slides back in under the ropes.

Antonio Cesaro is in at #22 and gets in a fight with Sheamus as the fans start the dueling Cena chants. Everybody is back up now and Great Khali is #23. It’s chops all around until things calm a bit. Kane comes in at #24 to fire things up again (get it?) but the ring is too full. It gets even worse with Zach Ryder coming in at #25 but HELL NO dumps Khali. Bryan dumps Kane but Cesaro dumps Bryan into Kane’s arms. Daniel: YES! Kane shouts no and drops Bryan for the elimination in a funny bit.

Randy Orton is #26 and it’s powerslams all around. Ziggler and Dallas get a double Elevated DDT and it’s an RKO for Ryder, followed by the elimination. Jinder Mahal gets lucky #27 as Cesaro lifts Cena up, only to be eliminated himself. Ziggler gets launched to the ropes but slides back in as Miz is #28. He gets in a fight with Cesaro in the aisle and limps into the ring to sell the ankle injury from earlier. Sheamus dumps Mahal and Sin Cara is #29.

Cara tries an enziguri on Ziggler which misses by four inches but Ziggler sells it anyway. Bo Dallas pulls Barrett out in an elimination that should have led further than it did. Miz sends Jericho to the apron as Barrett pulls Dallas out from the floor. Ryback is #30 to give us a final grouping of Ryback, Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Cena, Sandow, Orton, Miz and Sin Cara. Damien is out first and Sin Cara quickly follows. Miz tries to power Ryback out and is tossed as well to get us down to six. Jericho is somehow still alive and hits a Lionsault on Cena but the springboard dropkick doesn’t eliminate Sheamus.

Ziggler backdrops Jericho to the apron and superkicks him out (missed as well but he’s spent at this point) but walks into an RKO. There’s one for Cena as well and Sheamus gets the third. That leaves Ryback to fight Orton but the monster gets taken down with an Elevated DDT. Ryback fights off the RKO and clotheslines Randy out to get us down to four. Ziggler DDTs Cena down but a Brogue Kick puts Dolph on the floor.

It’s Sheamus, Ryback and Cena with Ryback getting double suplexed down. Cena and Sheamus make things serious by LOOKING AT THE SIGN. John takes over but Ryback runs him over with a clothesline. Sheamus escapes the Shell Shock, looks at the sign, and hits White Noise on Ryback. The Brogue Kick is countered with a backdrop to eliminate Sheamus and we’re down to two.

They LOOK AT THE SIGN and do their signature taunts before Ryback spinebusters Cena down. The Meathook is countered into the STF and Ryback passes out, leaving him as dead weight. Ryback fights out of the corner and Cena’s head into the mat. He loads up a powerslam but Cena slips out the back and shoves Ryback out for the win and title shot at Wrestlemania.

Rating: B. It’s a good but not great Rumble. That being said, there was almost no other option to win here, even though it set up the rematch that no one wanted to see. There’s certainly some good stuff in it and there were no down spots, but you would expect more big moments than we got here.

Coming Home ad for Wrestlemania. That still should have been Wrestlemania XXX.

We recap CM Punk vs. The Rock. It’s a basic story: Punk has been champion for 434 days and Rock is getting a title shot because he’s the Rock, which was kind of a lame reason, especially when the shot was announced six months ago. That began a countdown that made everything Punk did meaningless, because there was no way it would be anyone but Rock taking the belt from him here. Yeah Punk got in some shots on Rock before the match, but this was as much of a layup as you could get. Also if Shield or anyone interferes, Punk is stripped of the title.

Rock, after waiting for them to chant his name, says he isn’t worried about Shield, even though they busted up his lung recently. He goes on a rant about how many hard things he’s been through, but redeems himself a bit by talking about his mom getting cancer but beating it to be here tonight. Punk has said that the people don’t count but Rock says every single one of them count to him. He reaches his hand out to everyone that believes in the Rock so he can get their power, if you smell what he’s cooking.

Raw World Title: The Rock vs. CM Punk

Punk of course has Heyman with him. He charges right into the brawl and actually pounds Rock down into the corner. A quick Rock Bottom is countered but Punk is sent outside. Rock follows him outside and sends the champion into the barricade before loading up the announce table. Punk comes back with a shot to the ribs and puts the table back together in a great bit. Back in and Rock scores with more right hands to knock Punk to the floor again.

Punk is whipped into the barricade one more time but he gets a boot up to stop a charging Bull. He finishes fixing the announce table instead of following up on Rock before dropping Rock ribs first on the barricade. They head inside again for a body vice from CM followed by a knee to the ribs for two. Off to a freaky looking hold where Punk pins Rock’s shoulders down but pulls back on his head to crank on the shoulders and back.

More choking follows and a knee to the back has Rock on the apron, followed by a springboard dropkick to send him outside. Punk tries a top rope ax handle to take Rock down but injures his knee in the process. Rock scores with some kicks to the knee but the champion easily sends him out to the floor to stop the comeback. Back in and Punk misses the springboard clothesline and reinjures the knee, giving Rock his opening.

A DDT gets one on Punk but he fights out of the Rock Bottom. The GTS is countered into a Sharpshooter attempt but Punk counters into the Anaconda Vice in a nice sequence. Rock rolls over into a cradle, forcing Punk to let go of the hold. Back up and tries the Rock Bottom but Punk counters into a rollup for two, only to be countered into a low seated Sharpshooter. Punk is next to the rope so naturally he takes thirty seconds to get the break.

Rock takes him to the floor and loads up the announce table again. They fight on top but Rock counters a GTS attempt into what was supposed to be a Rock Bottom but was really more like the table collapsing with Rock’s arm around Punk’s chest. Rock comes up holding his knee and both guys make it back in at an eight count. Punk scores with a high kick but both guys are down.

Back up and Rock wins a slugout before scoring with the spinebuster. He loads up the People’s Elbow and there go the lights. Cole can see Shield pulling Rock to the floor and powerbombing him through the table. The lights come back up and Rock is laid out as the referee has no idea what’s going on. The announcers try to tell Mike Chioda what happened and Punk feigns innocence.

He throws Rock back in for the pin and celebrates but here’s Vince to say Punk is stripped of the title for the interference. Rock says no and to restart the match. The bell rings again and Punk stomps away as JBL threatens to put Cole through a table for playing cheerleader. The Macho Elbow gets two but the GTS is countered into a spinebuster, setting up the People’s Elbow to end Punk’s reign.

Rating: B. It’s another good match but it felt like they were dancing around for twenty three minutes before we got to the obvious ending. The Shield stuff was a decent fake out but it really didn’t need to be there. Rock winning was obvious though and that really put a ceiling on how high this was going to get.

Rock celebrates for about three minutes to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Yeah it’s a good show overall, but the major problem is obvious: there was no other possibly ending other than Rock vs. Cena at Wrestlemania 29 and almost everyone knew it. The show is definitely entetaining and actually really good at times, but it was so telegraphed up and down the card that it offers almost no excitement at all, even on the initial viewing. Still though, worth checking out if you have nothing else to do.

Ratings Comparison

Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz

Original: C-
Redo: D+

Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show

Original: B
Redo: C-

HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

Original: C
Redo: C

Royal Rumble

Original: C+
Redo: B

The Rock vs. CM Punk

Original: B
Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A-
Redo: B

That original overall rating is too high for what I gave everything else. Also I think the original last man standing match rating is closer to the accurate one. It just didn’t hold up as well on a second viewing, but it was good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

 

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Smackdown – January 14, 2022: Guest Star, Flashbacks And Tomfoolery

Smackdown
Date: January 14, 2022
Location: CHI Health Center, Omaha, Nebraska
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We are just over two weeks away from the royal Rumble and the big match on this side is Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Raw’s Seth Rollins. That is likely going to mean Brock Lesnar will be getting involved and I’m curious to see where that is going to go. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar arguing over Paul Heyman, leading to Reigns dropping Lesnar with a Superman Punch. Then Seth Rollins was announced as the opponent in a bit of a weird pick.

Here are the Usos for a chat. They talk about how the only team to ever give them a real fight is the New Day, but they beat them again last week. Instead of helping Roman Reigns against Seth Rollins, we need to have a four way to consider the #1 contendership. Jimmy even handles the entrances, with a special/not so serious voice.

Los Lotharios vs. Viking Raiders vs. Cesaro/Mansoor vs. Jinder Mahal/Shanky

One fall to a finish and the Usos throw in some brief instructions, including remember that they’re the ones. The Usos fire off some superkicks but get sent to the floor so the brawl can be on. We take a break before the bell and come back joined in progress with Humberto diving into an atomic drop from Mansoor.

Cesaro comes in but Erik tags himself in to kick away at Shanky. Mansoor and Cesaro head outside for some reason but come back up to see Jinder beating on Erik in the corner. Erik fights over and brings in Ivar, who is driven into Shanky’s face in the corner. Ivar gets caught on top though and Cesaro/Mahal (weird combination) load up a double superplex. That takes too long though and Erik makes it a Tower of Doom as we take a break.

Back with Cesaro getting the hot tag to clean house, including hammering away on Humberto. Ivar tags himself back in so Cesaro takes him down for the start of a swing. Mahal breaks that up with a Khallas and it’s time for the parade of people hitting each other. Erik gets double superkicked and Los Lotharios dive onto Cesaro and Mansoor. Back in and Ivar cleans house, setting up the Viking Experience to finish Angel at 9:31.

Rating: C+. They kept this one fast enough and had everyone getting in there as fast as they could. The Raiders are the only team on Smackdown that feels like they could be a threat to the Usos so this was the best way they could have gone. If nothing else, it is almost interesting to see who they randomly throw Cesaro with on a given week, as the nothing teams just keep coming.

Post match the Usos get on the announcers’ table and shout at the Raiders, who can’t raid Samoa.

Naomi comes in to see Sonya Deville and wants to know why Deville is holding her back. Deville says when the jacket is on, she is Naomi’s boss and she doesn’t like Naomi’s attitude. Now Naomi needs to get out of here before she loses her Royal Rumble match. This is every interaction these two have had for months now. Naomi leaves so Adam Pearce comes in to talk about how cold Sonya has the temperature in here. Oh I have a bad feeling about where this is going.

We look at some of the history between Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns, mainly looking at the original Shield run.

Here is Sami Zayn to talk about how the conspiracy against him is finally going to end, but now there is a new cast member in the conspiracy: Johnny Knoxville. We see Knoxville throwing him over the top last week, with Sami saying he is going to show the world that no one can is better at being a jackass than him. After realizing that might not be the best wording, it’s time for the debut of his own stunt show: InZayn!

There is a wooden ramp set up but Sami runs to the back, only to come out in a shopping cart with two guys pushing him. He is going to use that ramp to jump the ring….but it does look kind of far. It’s so far that he changes his mind at the last second. Zayn gets in the ring but here is Rick Boogs for a distraction. Shinsuke Nakamura comes in for Kinshasa and Boogs gorilla pressed Zayn over the top and onto the crash pad.

Aliyah is ready for her singles debut and hopes she doesn’t embarrass herself. Natalya comes in to say there is no shame in embarrassing yourself against her because she has three Guinness World Records. Natalya even has the book, which Aliyah didn’t know was still a thing. The glare sends Aliyah to the ring.

Aliyah vs. Natalya

After Aliyah makes her entrance, Natalya is still in the back to talk about her records: most matches by a woman in WWE history, most pay per view matches in WWE history and most wins by a woman in WWE history. Tonight, she is going to set the record for fastest win in WWE history, breaking the mark of 3.8 seconds. Natalya stomps her down in the corner and unloads before the bell. The referee says she can’t do this but Aliyah says she can….but there is no match anyway. Actually scratch that as the bell rings and Aliyah rolls her up for the pin at 3 seconds. Why yes, that is a new WWE record for a fastest pin at 3.1 seconds.

Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville think it is getting hot in their office but the thermostat seems to be broken.

More Reigns vs. Rollins history, this time looking at Rollins turning on the Shield.

Michael Cole brings out Lita (looking rather orange) for the first time on Smackdown in nearly 20 years. Lita is glad to be home and is proud of her career. She never got to be in the Royal Rumble in her day though and now she is going to win the match and headline Wrestlemania. Cue Charlotte to interrupt, saying she will handle this interview. Charlotte says this run that Lita is on will be over, with the Wrestlemania dreams being over.

Lita has heard about Charlotte and doesn’t get the flashback Friday Tonya Harding thing. She doesn’t get how Charlotte doesn’t tip over with that giant head. The fans chant GIANT HEAD but Charlotte says she can’t hear it. Charlotte talks about beating Trish Stratus at Summerslam 2019, sending her back into retirement. Maybe Charlotte can do that to Lita too, which causes things to get physical. Lita leaves her laying with a Twist of Fate.

We look at Ricochet breaking Ridge Holland’s nose at Day One.

Sheamus is ready to get some revenge for Holland’s sake.

Ricochet vs. Sheamus

Ricochet headlock takeovers him to start but Sheamus fights up and hits a hard shoulder. Back up and Ricochet knocks him to the floor with a running shoulder of his own. Sheamus heads around the ring and sweeps the leg to drop Ricochet onto the apron. A catapult sends Ricochet face first into the bottom of the ring as we take a break.

Back with Ricochet fighting up from a double arm crank and striking away. The Brogue Kick misses and Sheamus is sent to the apron, where Ricochet gets him tied up in the ropes. A springboard moonsault hits Sheamus’ back for two but the shooting star misses. Sheamus hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and gets rather annoyed. The ten forearms to the chest rock Ricochet so Sheamus goes up, only to get sent face first into the post. A springboard sunset bomb gives Ricochet two and a regular sunset flip gets the same. Then the Brogue Kick knocks Ricochet silly for the pin at 9:57.

Rating: C+. This was getting good near the end and then finished pretty fast. I tried not to convince myself to believe that Ricochet had a chance but he managed to make it work again. He’s so easy to turn into an underdog but for some reason he is never allowed to win anything and it gets a little tiring.

We look back at Aliyah’s record setting win, which is an official record.

Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce are still complaining about the heat so Pearce goes to see maintenance. Sonya takes the jacket off so here’s Naomi to say it’s time for a fight. Pearce comes back in to say not so fast and Sonya puts the jacket back on. To calm things down, Pearce makes Naomi vs. Charlotte again for next week.

We look at Seth Rollins cashing in Money in the Bank at Wrestlemania XXXI.

Kofi Kingston vs. Madcap Moss

Before the match, Kingston reads a proclamation that King Woods is injured and out of the Royal Rumble, but Kingston will be taking his place. Cue Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss to say Corbin will be in the Rumble, which makes them as happy as they have been since they injured Drew McIntyre. We see a clip of the attack on McIntyre, before Moss makes a joke about Kingston being scared of him. Kofi laughs so hysterically that he falls to the mat before knocking Moss to the floor. The big dive connects on Corbin and Moss as we take an early break.

Back with Kingston fighting out of a chinlock but getting planted with a powerslam. Kofi fires off some clotheslines and kicks Moss in the face in the corner. Moss rolls through a high crossbody though, only to have Kofi load up the SOS. That’s countered with a rake to the face though and the Punchline finishes Kingston at 5:40. Not enough shown to rate but this was a short way to build Moss up, because the world needs more Moss.

Here are Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns for their face to face showdown. Reigns tells Omaha to acknowledge him but Rollins throws out the Shield fist. Reigns says that’s beneath him but Rollins brings up that Reigns has never beaten him in a title match. That makes Reigns laugh because while Rollins is still in the past, he is the best ever. Rollins says he was climbing the ladder while Reigns was on the bench in the Canadian Football League. Then Rollins turned on him in the Shield and Reigns STILL needed help getting to the top.

Rollins created him and he can destroy him, but Reigns says if he wanted to face a star, Rollins wouldn’t even be his pick out of his house. He would have faced Rollins’ wife, so here are the Usos to chase Rollins off. Rollins says he’ll destroy Reigns to end the show. There were some good lines here but I don’t think we need much to hype up a Rollins vs. Reigns title match.

Overall Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling most of this one as it didn’t exactly seem like much happened. The Lita appearance was nice and they added a few people to the Rumble, but other than that it was kind of a show that came and went. Naomi vs. Sonya continues to just kind of sit there, and I’m almost scared to imagine them dragging that all the way to Wrestlemania. The good thing is they have most of the important stuff set for the pay per view, but another match or two might be a good idea. Not their best show here, as it felt like a bit of an off week.

Results
Viking Raiders b. Los Lotharios, Cesaro/Mansoor and Jinder Mahal/Shanky – Viking Experience to Humberto
Aliyah b. Natalya – Rollup
Sheamus b. Ricochet – Brogue Kick
Madcap Moss b. Kofi Kingston – Punchline

 

 

 

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Day One 2022: They Had To Do Something

Day One 2022
Date: January 1, 2022
Location: State Farm Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It’s the first show of the year and as interesting as that is, everything has changed at the very last minute. Universal Champion Roman Reigns has announced that he has tested positive for Coronavirus, meaning that he is out of his title defense against Brock Lesnar. Worry not though, as Lesnar is now in a five way for the WWE Title. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Ridge Holland/Sheamus vs. Cesaro/Ricochet

Sheamus has called Holland the replacement for Cesaro in the Bar, while Ricochet eliminated Sheamus from a recent gauntlet match. Cesaro starts with Sheamus, who bails into the corner and brings Holland in. That’s fine with Cesaro, who hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, followed by assisting Ricochet for a flipping stomp to Holland. That looked BAD as Ricochet’s boot hit him right in the face.

Sheamus comes back in for the Irish Curse to take over on Ricochet as a bloody Holland is taken to the back. The reverse chinlock goes on as we’re told Holland has a broken nose and will not be back in the match. Ricochet kicks him away and brings Cesaro back in to hammer on Sheamus for a change.

Sheamus is sent outside for a whip into the barricade. Back in and the Swing sets up the Sharpshooter but Sheamus makes the rope. Ricochet comes in for a save and knocks Sheamus outside, where he gets caught with White Noise on the floor. Cesaro catches the returning Sheamus with an uppercut for two but the Brogue Kick gives Sheamus the pin at 9:47.

Rating: C. In case you didn’t understand that Cesaro and Ricochet are essentially done in WWE, they just lost a handicap match on the Kickoff Show. I know that they were probably losing anyway even without the injury, but you can’t throw in a curve to save a bit of them here? Like have Sheamus cheat or something? It’s hard to imagine the two of them recovering if this is how they’re seen by WWE, and that doesn’t seem likely to change.

The opening video talks about how this is a new year and a new opportunity, with a member of Migos (musicians who are appearing tonight) talking about how important this is. We also get the usual clips of the major matches. There is no mention of Reigns, but we do get a quick mention of Lesnar being added to the WWE Title match. In this situation, that is all that can be done.

Commentary recaps the Reigns/Lesnar situation. Of note: they keep referring to this as the first “premium live event” of 2022, because this company has to make EVERYTHING sound corporate and more impressive than it really is.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. New Day

The Usos are defending and are coming off a loss to New Day thanks to the referee missing a tag. Woods shouts out to his hometown and grabs Jimmy’s arm to take him to the mat to start. Kofi comes in so Woods can hit a backsplash, setting up Kingston’s splash for two. Back up and Jimmy kicks him to the floor, where Jey adds a clothesline to take over. Choking and a cheap shot have Kofi in more trouble and there’s the running Umaga attack in the corner.

Jimmy knocks Woods off the apron as McAfee talks about how hard it is to remember 2020 because 2021 was just like counting. A superkick to the ribs has Kofi down again but he manages a shot to the face, allowing the hot tag to Woods. The Honor Roll sets up a Cradle Shock for two on Jimmy and everything breaks down. A pop up Samoan drop (the “Alley-Oos” (like in Uso) according to McAfee) gets two on Woods but he gets the better of a slugout with Jey.

It’s back to Kofi for a jumping clothesline and the Boom Drop but Trouble in Paradise is broken up. Jey comes back in with the Superfly Splash for two so it’s time to go after Kofi’s previously injured knee. The rope is grabbed and everything breaks down again, with Kofi grabbing the SOS for two. Daybreak gives Woods the same but he gets sent into the corner. A bunch of superkicks drop Kingston and the double Superfly Splash….gets two as Woods makes a diving save. With the kicks not working, the Usos bust out a 3D of all things to finish Kofi at 17:09.

Rating: B. This is the latest proof that WWE is capable of having a great match when the wrestlers are allowed to go out there and do their thing without some kind of wacky idea. These guys could have a classic in their sleep and they did it again here, as it was all kinds of great action and a rather surprising finish. Yes it was something we’ve seen before, but it was still awesome.

Video on Big E., who loves being positive but can turn on the seriousness when he needs to.

Big E. is ready for everyone, even if no one had this on their New Year’s Bingo cards tonight.

Migos are big fans and can’t wait to see the show.

Drew McIntyre vs. Madcap Moss

Happy Corbin is here with Moss so they call Atalanta fat and McIntyre’s prom date ugly. Moss, in suspenders, stomps away in the corner to start but McIntyre reverses into some chops. A suplex gets two on Moss and they head outside, where Corbin offers a distraction. That’s enough for Moss to post McIntyre to take over and it’s a running shoulder for two back inside.

McIntyre fights out of a chinlock and sends him hard into the corner, setting up the overhead belly to belly suplexes. The Futureshock is broken up so McIntyre settles for something like a Sky High for two instead. Moss can’t quite get a neckbreaker so McIntyre takes him into the corner. The top rope superplex is broken up and McIntyre it tied in the Tree of Woe. That’s fine with him as he does the situp into the big toss off the top. The Claymore finishes Moss at 9:40.

Rating: D+. This is certainly a match that happened and for some reason it happened on a major show like this one. I have no idea why they didn’t put this on television if it just had to happen but at least they didn’t do anything screwy like having Moss win (or even come close). McIntyre needs to move on, though there is a good chance that he has to beat Corbin soon too.

Kevin Owens calls this a tragedy or a travesty, whichever you prefer, because this was a three way match to start and now it’s five people fighting for one title. Worry not though, because he’s going to go talk to Seth Rollins.

Video on Seth Rollins, looking at how he got here and all of his successes.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Street Profits vs. RKBro

RKBro is defending and come to the ring with Migos. Dawkins and Riddle start things off with Riddle getting taken down in a hurry. That’s not the best start so it’s off to Orton for a headlock. With that not getting them very far, it’s off to Ford, who gets dropkicked down. Riddle comes back in for the assisted Floating Bro for the early near fall. Back up and Riddle gets caught in the wrong corner so the double teaming can begin.

Dawkins gets two off a suplex but Riddle kicks him away without much effort. It’s back to Orton to take over, including a double hanging DDT to the Profits. The RKO is countered into a rollup to give Ford two and Orton is sent shoulder first into the post. That’s enough to send the champs outside, where Ford hits a HUGE running flip dive over the corner. Back in and Ford heads up top, only to miss….something. Instead Riddle comes back in to set up a pop up RKO to retain the titles at 10:17.

Rating: C+. We have had two Tag Team Title matches tonight. One of them ended with a 3D and the other ended with a pop up RKO. Are you starting to see why this company can be seen as repetitive at times? The match wasn’t anything memorable and is just another win for the champs, but it was completely acceptable for a PPV title defense.

Post match everyone celebrates together, including Migos. Ignore Ford still being down and having to crawl to the apron.

Drew McIntyre doesn’t have much to say about his win, but Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss jump him, with Corbin crushing his neck with a chair.

Video on Bianca Belair, who came a long way to get a scholarship to the University of Tennessee.

Brock Lesnar is asked about the WWE Title match and goes into a Paul Heyman impression, saying he is a free agent…thanks to Heyman. Tonight he is winning the WWE Title, and that is a spoiler.

We recap Edge vs. Miz. Edge returned a few weeks ago but the returning Miz (with Maryse) returned for a big talk off, with both of them praising and insulting the other’s careers. Miz got the better of things more than once, but Edge gave them a Broodbath (erg) to ruin the renewal of their wedding vows. Now it’s a showdown.

Miz vs. Edge

Maryse is here with Miz, while Edge gets the Brood/Alter Bridge double entrance. Feeling out process to start and Miz bails into the corner from the threat of an Edgecution. Miz knocks him outside though and sends Edge into the barricade to take over, setting up the top rope ax handle to the head back inside. It’s time to go after Edge’s leg before a reverse DDT gives Miz two.

Miz kicks him to the apron but gets planted face first on the floor for his efforts. They’re right back on the floor, with Miz trying the Skull Crushing Finale on the announcers’ table. That’s reversed into Edge’s faceplant onto said table and it’s a high crossbody for two back inside. Miz goes back to the leg but the Figure Four attempt earns him a kick into the corner. Edge is sent shoulder first into the post though and it’s right back to the leg. Now the Figure Four can go on but Edge turns it over, leaving Miz to struggle for a long time.

With that broken up, Edge goes to the Crossface, only to have Maryse get Miz’s boot into the rope. Back up and stereo big boots put both of them down and they get a breather. Miz takes him into the corner for the kicks to the chest and the running clothesline before going up top. Edge is right there with a super hiptoss of all things but the spear hits the corner. Maryse gets in a cheap shot of some kick and the Skull Crushing Finale gets two. Cue Beth Phoenix (who stands there glaring at Maryse until her music hits) to chase Maryse off, leaving Edge to spear Miz for the pin at 19:59.

Rating: B-. This took some time to get going but the fans were into it by the end. I’m a little surprised by the ending, but you can see the mixed tag coming, probably at the Rumble. That should make for a good match, though I’m not sure how much we need another month of these two fighting. The match was good stuff, with the leg work being a fine way to go and Maryse getting involved set up the finish, though it never hit that next gear.

MVP and Bobby Lashley aren’t worried about Brock Lesnar being added to the title match.

We recap Becky Lynch vs. Liv Morgan for the Raw Women’s Title. Lynch had to cheat to beat Morgan in their first title match but Morgan wanted/got a rematch. Before accepting though, Lynch injured Morgan’s arm so she isn’t coming in at 100% here.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Liv Morgan

Lynch is defending and has goats on the shoulders of her jacket. Liv starts fast and knocks Becky outside for some rams into the announcers’ table. Back in and the Manhandle Slam is broken up, allowing Liv to roll her up for two. The Rings of Saturn send Becky straight to the ropes but she is able to catapult Liv throat first into the bottom rope. After a random shot of a fan in the crowd, Lynch hammers away on the mat as we keep cutting to the fans.

Morgan fights back and kicks her into the corner before hammering away with right hands of her own. There’s the enziguri to rock Lynch again and a middle rope dropkick gets two. Becky gets a cross armbreaker out of nowhere but Liv slips out and takes her down again. Liv goes up but gets knocked down, only to come back with a running springboard sunset bomb for two. A belly to back faceplant gives Lynch two but she misses a middle rope legdrop.

Liv is right back with a missile dropkick (to the stomach) and Becky bails to the floor. That means a big suicide dive but Lynch takes her around for some rams into the announcers’ table. Back up and Liv sends Becky into the steps before stomping on the arm like Lynch did to her. That’s broken up and Lynch hits her in the face but Lynch is right back with something like Oblivion off the top. The Rings of Saturn goes on again but Lynch reverses into a cradle for two. Another Oblivion is countered into the Manhandle Slam and the pin at 17:14, with Lynch reaching for the ropes to cheat but not quite getting there.

Rating: B-. These two were working hard out there and it wound up being a good match as a result. Morgan is not polished in the ring yet and still seems to be in over her head a lot, but she is getting better at making the most out of what she can do. This was about as close as she could get without winning, though aside from Rhea Ripley, I’m not sure who else on Raw is available for a fresh feud with Lynch at the moment. Maybe they run this back one more time, but that might be going too far with the feud.

Seth Rollins isn’t worried about the other four people in the WWE Title match because they’re not Seth Freaking Rollins. He’s going to stomp heads and win.

Johnny Knoxville, of Jackass fame, is in the Royal Rumble. Really.

We recap the WWE Title match. It was original a triple threat but then Bobby Lashley was added. Then Brock Lesnar was added to make it even wackier.

WWE Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Brock Lesnar vs. Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins vs. Big E.

Big E. is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. It’s a big brawl to start and Lesnar fires off suplexes on Owens and Rollins. Big E. hits some running clotheslines to put Brock on the floor. Lashley sends Big E. into the post and hits the spear to drive Lesnar through the barricade. Lashley gets back in, where Owens and Rollins superkick him down.

Rollins knees Lesnar off the apron and Owens adds the bullfrog splash from the apron for a bonus. Some steps to the ribs put Lashley and Lesnar down before it’s time to set up the announcers’ table. Lashley fights both of them off but Big E. Rock Bottoms him through the table in the big crash.

Owens and Rollins are back up with a double DDT to drive Lesnar into the steps but Big E. takes Rollins down. The pop up sitout powerbomb gives Owens two on Big E. and Rollins adds a frog splash for two. Lesnar is back in with F5’s all around but Lashley is back in to spear Lesnar down for two more. The Hurt Lock has Lesnar in trouble until Big E. makes the save. There’s the Big Ending to Lashley but Lesnar escapes and hits an F5 on Big E. for the pin and the title at 8:23.

Rating: B. This was straight out of the Summerslam 2017 playbook, albeit with less time. They hit the gas to start and then never stopped, which is how a match like this should have gone. Lesnar winning the title is a surprise, though it seems like we are heading for a showdown between him and Lashley, which should be incredible. Big E.’s title reign was in trouble from the start and ended even worse, but dang I feel sorry for him to have to lose it like this. It was a heck of a match, but the idea of a long Lesnar reign makes my head hurt.

Overall Rating: B. It was a rather solid show, with only McIntyre vs. Moss bringing it down (and that is more to do with the match existing than the match itself). While there is nothing that blew the roof off, there were a bunch of good matches that felt like they belonged on a pay per view. The ending changes more than a few things and should set up the WWE Title match at the Royal Rumble, so it did have some important moments. Good show here and we could see some interesting things as we start the Road To Wrestlemania.

Results
Usos b. New Day – 3D to Kingston
Drew McIntyre b. Madcap Moss – Claymore
RKBro b. Street Profits – Assisted RKO to Ford
Edge b. Miz – Spear
Becky Lynch b. Liv Morgan – Manhandle slam
Brock Lesnar b. Big E., Kevin Owens, Seth Rollins and Bobby Lashley – F5 to Big E.

 

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Day One 2022 Preview

We’ve got a new show this week and this time it is based around a new year. I’m not sure how interesting that is for a full pay per view, but WWE has set things up around flimsier premises before. The good thing is the card looks pretty solid and we could be in for a nice event. That is assuming the Coronavirus pandemic doesn’t wreck anything at the last minute. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Ricochet/Cesaro vs. Sheamus/Ridge Holland

This was added earlier in the week and it sounds good on paper. If nothing else, it is nice to see Ricochet and Cesaro getting some kind of a spot, as they so often feel like people just there to fill in time on television when no one else is available. Sheamus and Holland could make for a nice mentor/mentee twist on the Bar, which seems to be the focal point of how we got here in the first place.

As for the match, I can’t imagine Sheamus and Holland losing when they seem to be a bit of a project for the future. It doesn’t help that Ricochet and Cesaro are the definition of jobbers to the stars at this point and I can’t imagine that is going to change in the span of a Kickoff Show match. That’s more than a bit depressing, but both of their ships seem to have sailed a long time ago.

Edge vs. The Miz

Let’s get one of the bigger ones out of the way first as we have what could have been a much more interesting match that just never made it to that next level. These two had some outstanding promo battles but after that it turned into a much more standard WWE build towards a big match. It still feels like a pretty good showdown, but there is something missing from the whole thing.

I’ll go with Miz winning due to some Maryse interference, which brings us to the missing thing: Beth Phoenix, who seems rather likely to come back and make this a mixed tag, maybe even at Wrestlemania. I don’t know if it’s interesting enough to go that far, but it’s hard to imagine that we don’t get the tag match at some point. You have a pretty hard time getting there with Edge winning, so Miz takes the first match.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos(c) vs. New Day

Yes, we’re at it again, as these teams seem destined to feud forever. The good thing is you can more or less guarantee a near classic with this one so it isn’t like it’s a bad idea. I’m sure the match will be very good, but it is a little hard to get excited when it seemed they were building to King Woods vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title and instead we’re getting a match that has been done nearly to death.

The more I think about it, the more I could see New Day winning here so we’ll go with that. It’s not like they need another title reign, but the Usos have held the things for a long, long time now and it might be smart to shake things up a bit. Throw in Paul Heyman being fired by Reigns and the team might be a little shaky by comparison. Either way, this should be a near classic, as these four tend to have.

Raw Tag Team Titles: RKBro(c) vs. Street Profits

I’m not sure how, but this feels like a heck of a showdown between two teams that are quite the big deals. RKBro has held the titles for about four months while the Profits are one of the better teams going today. That should make for a showdown and they worked well together in their previous match. That’s a nice feeling to have for a Tag Team Title match for a change, as it doesn’t happen on the red side very often.

I’ll take RKBro to retain, but they’re getting into a weird spot with their title reign. They are all but out of teams to give them a run for their money (save for the Profits here) and I don’t know who takes the titles from them if they make it out of this one. There aren’t many other options so while there is a chance they do a switch here, I think there is enough left in RKBro to validate them holding the titles.

Drew McIntyre vs. Madcap Moss

Here’s the easiest match on the show, as you have a former multiple time World Champion against a literal comedy guy. Somehow this match is taking place over a sword that was stabbed into a desk, which has to be up there for the weirdest/weakest reasons to have a pay per view match. I think we all know what to expect here and in this case, that is not a bad thing.

McIntyre wins here, in what should be dominant fashion, as even Happy Corbin’s interference isn’t enough to keep Moss around. It would not be out of the question to see McIntyre challenging for the Universal Title at Wrestlemania and there is no sense at all in having him lose what feels like a squash. Then again, it makes little sense to have him in this match in the first place, but at least he should win it pretty easily.

WWE Title: Big E.(c) vs. Seth Rollins vs. Kevin Owens vs. Bobby Lashley

They are in a pretty awkward spot here as Lashley is looking like the star of stars on Monday Night Raw at the moment but Big E. has already gone over him twice. It also doesn’t help that Lashley was such a dominant champion and had cleared out the main event scene, so it isn’t like they have many other options for him should he get the title back. That leaves Rollins and Owens as the underdogs, which could open some doors for them.

I’ll still go with Big E. though, as Rollins doesn’t seem likely to get the title back and Owens is probably there to take the pin. Big E. has been badly overshadowed by Lashley in recent weeks and I’m not sure how much longer he is going to keep the title. It seems like Lashley’s to win, unless they find something else for him to do in a hurry. Big E. retains for now though, even if it is just keeping it on him for a short while.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch(c) vs. Liv Morgan

Man alive I wanted to get into this match but, as usual, WWE has managed to take away almost everything that made Morgan interesting in the first place. The fans got behind Morgan because she was an underdog who probably shouldn’t be here but kept fighting anyway. Now she is being presented like a main event star and it has taken me pretty far out of the whole thing.

As much as I would love to see Morgan win the title, I can’t imagine they pull the trigger on anything that doesn’t involve one of the already established big stars. That has plagued WWE for a long time now, even if Morgan taking the title could be a heck of a feel good moment. Lynch is likely to retain here, probably in a more definitive manner than before, and then WWE will wonder why the division is falling apart right in front of them.

Smackdown World Title: Roman Reigns(c) vs. Brock Lesnar

Oh boy I’m not sure where to go with this one and that makes for a pretty fascinating main event. The Paul Heyman factor changes everything, and now the question is not so much when Heyman returns but rather does he do it here. That would be a heck of a fast turnaround for him to be back though and I don’t think it happens so soon. That gives us a problem though, and unfortunately I think I know where it’s going.

I think they actually do the title change here, as Reigns isn’t good enough to beat Lesnar without Heyman in his corner. That is going to open up a long list of issues, but for now I think Lesnar takes the title, likely setting up some big showdown at Wrestlemania for when they really want to do something new. These two are forever joined at the hip, and this time I think it’s Lesnar taking the title again.

Overall Thoughts

Overall, I’m liking what we’re seeing with this show and it could be a good one. Now that being said, this is WWE and there is always the chance that they are going to screw something up. I’m not sure how big of a show this is going to be going forward, but the first edition is a stacked card that could be quite good if it lives up to its rather high potential.

 

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Smackdown – December 24, 2021: Santa Will Be Pleased (Maybe)

Smackdown
Date: December 24, 2021
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s Christmas Eve and thankfully we are taped instead of running a live show. We have a stacked card this week too, with a 12 man gauntlet match for to crown a new #1 contender to the Intercontinental Title, along with a showdown for the SmackDown Women’s Title as Charlotte defends against Toni Storm. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the end of last year’s show, with Roman Reigns hugging Paul Heyman, then firing him and laying him out with the Superman Punch. Then it was Brock Lesnar coming out and attacking Reigns to wrap things up.

Earlier today, Kayla Braxton sat down with a disheveled Paul Heyman (he needs to shave) so he can tell his side of the story. What happened was he was publicly fired, publicly attacked and publicly shamed. He told Roman Reigns the truth and he paid the price for it, publicly. Heyman doesn’t regret telling the truth because he was doing his job as special counsel.

Last week, his things had been thrown out of the locker room, but he had done his job. Reigns is the greatest Universal Champion of all time, but he needs to be protected from Brock Lesnar. Maybe now he needs to go to NXT and cherry pick a top talent and start over. But no, not at this stage. He put everything into Roman Reigns, but without him, maybe it’s time to acknowledge that his career is most likely over. Sweet goodness this man is talented.

Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Toni Storm

Charlotte is defending. They fight over a lockup to start with Storm not being able to get very far. Charlotte kicks her in the ribs but gets crossbodied down for an early one. The champ needs a breather on the floor before coming back in to stomp/chop away in the corner. We hit the figure four necklock for a bit until Charlotte flips her over, setting up the nipup. Back up and Storm scores with a headbutt, only to get kicked out to the floor as we take a break.

We come back with Charlotte slapping her in the face and shouting about how much better she is than Storm. That’s enough to get Storm back up, so Charlotte blasts her with a clothesline. Storm finally hits a snap suplex but Charlotte forearms her in the corner. The Downward Spiral into the middle buckle cuts Storm off yet again, setting up the double moonsault for a double two.

Natural Selection is blocked though and Storm hits a quick German suplex. Not that it matters as Charlotte pulls her into the Figure Four (it takes a bit but she gets there), forcing Toni to roll into the ropes for the break. Back up and a big boot sends Storm out to the floor to keep up the near dominance. Some rollups give Storm two but Charlotte reverses into a small package of her own to retain at 14:35.

Rating: B-. Charlotte dominated the majority of the match until it felt like she caught Storm in the end. This was a feud that saw Charlotte get the better of things far more often than not and then beat Storm up in the title match. I’m not sure how this helped Storm in almost any way, but it wasn’t exactly a great look for her. I’m almost scared to see what is next for Charlotte, as she is running out of people to beat.

We look back at Drew McIntyre pulling Angela out of the desk after Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss couldn’t make it work.

Drew McIntyre and New Day are ready for the Usos and Madcap Moss tonight. It might even be time for some SEASONS BEATINGS!

Xia Li doesn’t like women like Natalya, who crush other women’s spirits. Violence/vengeance is promised.

Gauntlet Match

It’s a 12 Days Of Christmas Gauntlet Match with the winner getting an Intercontinental Title shot against Shinsuke Nakamura (ringside with Rick Boogs). Angel is in at #1 and Mansoor is in at #2 with the latter being pulled off the top for an early and nasty crash. An enziguri doesn’t get Mansoor very far as Angel hits the Wing Clipper for the pin at 1:36.

Erik is in at #3 and gets kicked off the apron before the bell. Angel tries a moonsault to the floor but gets pulled out of the air. Erik slams him hard on the floor and we take a break. Back with Erik kneeing him in the face for two but missing the running knees in the corner. Another Wing Clipper ends Erik at 6:59 and it’s Shanky in at #4.

A dropkick has no effect on Shanky, who knocks Angel hard into the corner. Wade Barrett’s old Wasteland ends Angel at 8:31 and it’s Ivar in at #5. A big boot drops Ivar but he’s right back up with some corner clotheslines to put Shanky down for a change. The Viking Splash ends Shanky at 9:51 so here is Sheamus in at #6. Sheamus hammers away but gets punched out to the floor as we take another break. Back again with Sheamus grabbing the chinlock to keep Ivar in trouble. That’s broken up with viking power but Sheamus Brogue Kicks him for the pin at 15:50.

Drew Gulak is in at #7 and gets Brogue Kicked for the pin at 16:31. Cesaro is in at #8 with bad ribs but hits a high crossbody for two anyway. That’s a Regal roll onto the ribs and we hit an armbar of all things to keep Cesaro down. Cesaro fights up but it’s a Ridge Holland distraction so Sheamus can hit another Brogue Kick for the pin at 21:18. Ricochet is in at #9 and kicks Sheamus outside for a heck of a top rope Asai moonsault to send us to another break.

Back again with Sheamus hitting the Irish Curse and grabbing a chinlock. Sheamus powerslams him to cut off a comeback attempt, setting up the ten forearms to the chest. A top rope clothesline misses though and Ricochet grabs a tornado DDT for two more. Ricochet’s Lionsault hits knees so Sheamus grabs a small package for a very near fall. Sheamus gets knocked off the top to set up a standing moonsault for two more. Holland offers another distraction though, allowing Sheamus to knee Ricochet off the apron. Cue Cesaro to take out Holland to distract Sheamus, with Ricochet getting the rollup pin at 30:52.

Humberto is in at #10 but first, Sheamus gets to knock Ricochet silly again. Humberto’s moonsault hits raised knees though and it’s the Recoil for the pin at 32.21. Jinder Mahal is in at #11 and drops Ricochet onto the apron toput him in trouble. The Khallas is countered into a cradle to give rid of Mahal at 33:01 though and it’s Sami Zayn in at #12. We take another break and come back with Sami pounding him in the corner and hitting a clothesline for two.

Sami goes up and talks trash, with the delay being enough for Ricochet to snap off a super hurricanrana for two of his own. Ricochet blocks the Blue Thunder Bomb and hits a crossbody for two more. The Blue Thunder Bomb gives Sami a rather near fall but he can’t hit an exploder into the corner. Another attempt does connect but the Helluva Kick is cut off with a superkick. The Benedriller gives Ricochet a very close two so Ricochet heads up top. The shooting star press only hits knees though and it’s a second exploder into the corner. Now Sami can hit the Helluva Kick for the pin and the win at 42:16.

Rating: B-. This was rather long and that’s a good idea on a show like this one. Sami winning wasn’t quite a huge surprise, as he has been quite the focal point of Smackdown for the last few weeks. It wouldn’t surprise me to see him getting the title in the end. Nakamura has done well as champion, but Sami has more of a story going and it would make sense to see him win. The rest of the match had its moments, especially from Ricochet and Sheamus, but a lot of people were in and out without much going on. You have to do something like that in this kind of a match, though it does mean things go rather fast.

We look back at Roman Reigns firing Paul Heyman again.

We get a long, detailed look at Paul Heyman’s career, including a good bit of WCW and ECW footage. After a look at everything that happened to him with Brock Lesnar and Roman Reigns, we wrap it up with the ending of the show’s opening segment, with Heyman saying his career is probably over. This was pretty cool and showed you just how far Heyman has come in his career.

Madcap Moss/Usos vs. Drew McIntyre/New Day

Miracle on 34th Street Fight with Happy Corbin in Moss/Usos’ corner. Woods headlocks Jey to start and then decks him with a forearm. It’s off to Kofi for the slingshot Vader Bomb but he gets taken into the wrong corner. That doesn’t last long though as McIntyre gets the tag so he can hammer on Moss for a bit. Everything breaks down and it’s Corbin coming in with a candy cane kendo stick to drop McIntyre. The other four fight on the stage, with New Day being thrown through boxes and trees.

We take a break and come back with everyone at ringside, including the Usos still using the boxes on New Day. Kofi gets crushed between two trees (Cole: “The old Christmas tree sandwich!”) as Moss stops McIntyre with some raised boots in the corner. McIntyre is back with a suplex as Woods finds a chair in one of the boxes. We go ECW with a Van Daminator to Jimmy but some egg nog seems to slow him down.

That leaves Kofi to Boom Drop Jimmy, followed by a top rope spinning hurricanrana (cool). It’s time to bring in the cookies, which Kofi slams onto the Usos’ heads, because it’s a theme thing. Moss yells at McIntyre so it’s some snap belly to belly suplexes into a neckbreaker for Moss’ troubles. Corbin breaks up the Claymore though so Kofi egg nogs him. McIntyre does the same to Corbin and Moss at the same time, leaving Woods to kick Corbin into the announcers’ table. The Claymore finishes Moss at 12:30.

Rating: C. This is a match where your tolerance for goofy themed comedy will decide everything. Ignoring all that though, this was mainly a not that great six man, with the good guys fighting from underneath to win in the end. That’s not the most thrilling way to wrap it up, but at least McIntyre got to kick Moss in the face. For a fun main event on a less than serious show, not too shabby though.

Post match McIntyre and New Day throw presents into the crowd (McIntyre seems rather proud of one of his throws) to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. The Heyman stuff was excellent and makes me wonder where the story is going. Throw in a good and rather long gauntlet match, a somewhat depressing Women’s Title match and a fun enough main event and we’ll call this a goodish show. It’s definitely a week that seems like they were taking the night off, but at least they did enough good things to carry us to the last week of the year.

Results
Charlotte b. Toni Storm- Small package
Sami Zayn won a gauntlet match last eliminating Ricochet
New Day/Drew McIntyre b. Madcap Moss/Usos – Claymore to Moss

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – December 17, 2021: They Made A Move

Smackdown
Date: December 17, 2021
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We’re rapidly approaching Day One and the big main event of Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns is all set. That should open a few interesting doors this week, but there are some other matches that need some work of their own. Hopefully the build keeps working so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of last week, with Paul Heyman not liking the friendlier Brock Lesnar and seemingly snapping him back into Beast Mode. Roman Reigns might not be pleased though.

Toni Storm/Sasha Banks vs. Shotzi/Charlotte

Fallout from Storm becoming #1 contender to Charlotte last week when Charlotte kicked her face in. Storm takes Shotzi down with a headlock to start and then kicks her in the chest. Banks, in Spider-Man gear, comes in for the showdown with Charlotte, who gets taken down with a running hurricanrana. It’s back to Storm, allowing Charlotte to kick Banks in the face. Shotzi knocks Storm outside as well and we take a break.

Back with Banks blocking Shotzi’s kick to the ribs but Charlotte gets in a cheap shot to take over. A backbreaker gets two on Banks and it’s Shotzi tagging herself back in. The running crotch attack on the ropes misses though and it’s back to Storm to atomic drop Shotzi. Everything breaks down and it’s Charlotte knocking Storm and Banks out to the floor.

We take another break and come back with Storm kicking Charlotte away and bringing Banks back in to clean house. Banks hits a spinning crossbody for two on Charlotte, followed by a rollup for the same. The Rey Mysterio sitout bulldog plants Charlotte and Storm comes in off a blind tag. A Downward Spiral is broken up and Charlotte sends her face first into the buckle in the corner. Charlotte loads up the moonsault but only hits knees, allowing Storm to cradle her for the pin at 18:57.

Rating: B-. This was your long form wrestling match and that’s something a show can use. The problem here is that it’s hard to buy into Storm as a threat to Charlotte after how the feud has gone so far. Yes Storm got a pin here, but is there any reason to believe she’s a threat to Charlotte? Storm has been treated as beneath Charlotte throughout the feud and that is likely to be the case in the title match too.

King Woods is on his throne while a variety of wrestlers sing his praises. The Usos come in to mock New Day but they promise to take the Tag Team Titles. Threats are exchanged.

Natalya isn’t worried about Naomi or Xia Li. Yeah Xia Li is a protector but she is going to need some protection.

Raw Rebound.

Viking Raiders vs. Jinder Mahal/SShanky

Of note: the Raiders had their entrance, then we had a break, then we had Natalya’s promo and the Raw Rebound, then we had another break. How is that the best option? Anyway, we’re joined in progress with Mahal kneeing Erik in the face and bringing in Shanky to hammer away in the corner.

A big chop staggers Erik and it’s back to Mahal to stomp him down again. Erik fights out of a chinlock though and rolls over for the tag to Ivar to take over. Mahal gets knocked down and it’s back to Erik, who slams Ivar onto him for two. Everything breaks down and Ivar is driven into Shanky in the corner. Mahal is taken down and Ivar hits a top rope splash for the pin on Shanky at 4:58.

Rating: C-. I approve of the Vikings getting a win, but I don’t have much of a reason to believe they’re going to become a thing going forward. They have won before and gone nowhere, though they could be an interesting st of challengers for the Usos. I doubt we get there, but there is something nice about seeing Mahal and Shanky get beaten up.

We look back at Drew McIntyre driving his sword into Adam Pearce’s desk, which was then stolen by Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss.

Paul Heyman is waiting in the parking lot when a big SUV comes in. It’s Brock Lesnar though, who has Heyman rather nervous. Maybe Heyman was expecting Roman Reigns?

It’s time for Happy Talk, with Happy Corbin being rather pleased about the desk (still including sword). Moss hangs his hat on the sword and has some jokes about how McIntyre doesn’t have his sword anymore. The fans chant for CM PUNK but Corbin has a better idea: Moss can pull the sword out and keep it.

There are three problems though: Moss can’t pull it out, Corbin can’t pull it out, and the two of them can’t pull it out. Instead here is Drew McIntyre himself to cut things off (not a moment too soon) and ask if the two of them are having some performance issues. The fight is on with McIntyre clearing the ring and pulling the sword out with no problem. This segment was terrible and I usually love Moss’ terrible jokes.

Sami Zayn comes in to see Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville. He loves the idea of giving around the holiday season, but goes into a rant about everything he has had taken from him. The bosses have an idea though: Sami can be in a 12 man gauntlet match next week and the winner gets an Intercontinental Title shot. Zayn doesn’t seem thrilled.

Cesaro vs. Ridge Holland

Sheamus is here with Holland, who hits Cesaro in the ribs with his club before the bell. We take a break and come back with Cesaro’s ribs taped up, so Holland drives him ribs first into the corner. A backbreaker makes it even worse and we hit the abdominal stretch to stay on the ribs. Cesaro fights out and hits a belly to back, setting up a clothesline to the floor. Cesaro throws him back in but Sheamus offers a distraction, allowing Holland to hit Northern Grit for the pin at 2:59.

Drew McIntyre is hunting for Madcap Moss and Happy Corbin.

Here is Naomi for a chat. Naomi reads off her Christmas list: face Sonya Deville one on one at Day One. Actually Naomi wants to face Sonya right now, so cue Deville to say she isn’t fighting while she is wearing the suit. Instead, she has an opponent for Naomi right now: Shayna Baszler. That’s cool with Naomi, but she wants Sonya in the ring now instead. Sonya gets in but here is Baszler to take out Naomi’s leg. Ring the bell.

Naomi vs. Shayna Baszler

Sonya goes for a leglock but gets cradled for the pin at 29 seconds.

Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss are hiding, but get interviewed anyway. They don’t like the lights being turned on, but they’ll be laughing all the way to new year’s, when McIntyre faces Moss. That doesn’t seem to be cool with Moss, though he smiles anyway.

Usos vs. New Day

Non-title, because the title match is at Day One. Kofi grabs the SOS for an early two on Jey but it’s off to Jimmy to unload in the corner. The chinlock goes on as McAfee gives Hulk Hogan a shoutout. Kofi fights up and hits a superkick but Jey breaks up the tag attempt. We take a break and come back with Woods coming in off the hot tag for the clothesline comeback.

There’s a big dive to the floor to take Jey down, setting up a guillotine legdrop on Jimmy. Jey sends Woods into the barricade though, leaving Kofi to get superkicked for two. Back in and Woods breaks up Jey’s Superfly Splash, allowing Kofi to hit Trouble in Paradise for the pin on Jimmy at 8:30.

Rating: C+. Naturally an Usos vs. New Day match was good, but are you really surprised by the dumb logic here? To make the match interesting, we see the match in advance? Usos vs. New Day is one of those rivalries that will never end and this was just another chapter, but egads this kind of thing makes my head hurt. Just do ANYTHING else but this kind of double match deal.

Roman Reigns arrives and wants to go to his arena.

Here is Roman Reigns, with Paul Heyman still holding the belt and the loser Usos here too. After the required acknowledgment, Reigns says he doesn’t like it when his cousins lose. They can get through anything though because they’re blood. Heyman isn’t blood though, and he should know that Reigns can’t have people disrespecting him. If they disrespect him, they disrespect Reigns’ family.

Can he trust the wise man? Heyman seemed a little shady last week, so Reigns needs to know: did Heyman know Lesnar was going to be at Summerslam? Or at Madison Square Garden? Or that Lesnar’s suspension was going to be lifted? Reigns gets to the point: is Heyman a special counsel or is he an advocate? Heyman can’t answer, but Reigns wants Heyman to acknowledge him with the truth. Why is he protecting Lesnar?

Heyman says he isn’t protecting Lesnar from Reigns, but rather protecting Reigns from Lesnar. That’s not good with Reigns, but he hugs Heyman and says he loves him. Reigns thanks him for forty years of service (Heyman: “I love you my tribal chief.”)….and then fires him. The Superman Punch lays Heyman out and the Conchairto is loaded up.

Cue Lesnar, who takes out the Usos without much trouble (including shrugging off a superkick). Lesnar charges in and, despite Reigns hitting him with a chair over and over, lays Reigns out with a pair of F5’s to end the show. So there’s your big twist in the story and it is something that needed to happen after so many months of will Heyman/won’t Heyman.

Overall Rating: C. There was some pretty good wrestling here, but the big angle at the end is what matters the most. They moved things forward in a huge way at the end and that is one of the best things that they could have done. I’m curious about where this goes, but we could be in for some interesting twists. There were more than a few problems on this show though, with that Moss/Corbin nonsense dragging it down just enough to put the whole thing in the middle.

Results
Toni Storm/Sasha Banks b. Charlotte/Shotzi – Rollup to Charlotte
Viking Raiders b. Jinder Mahal/Shanky – Top rope splash to Shanky
Ridge Holland b. Cesaro – Northern Grit
Naomi b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup
New Day b. Usos – Trouble in Paradise to Jimmy

 

 

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