Monday Night Raw – April 1, 2019: Fools In April Indeed
IMG Credit: WWE
Monday Night Raw
Date: April 1, 2019
Location: Capital One Arena, Washington DC
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young
It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and the big story is….Stephanie McMahon, who will be making some kind of major announcement about the upcoming main event. There’s a good chance that it’s going to be the addition of a winner take all stipulation, but you never can tell around here. Other than that, Brock Lesnar and Batista will be around to actually promote their matches. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
Here’s Stephanie McMahon to open things up. She’s adding herself to the match but cuts off the booing by saying it’s an April Fool’s joke. There really is breaking news though: whoever wins the main event of Wrestlemania leaves with both titles because it’s Winner Take All.
With that out of the way in record time, here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman for a chat. Heyman does his introduction (Heyman: “Don’t worry I’ll be doing this again next week too.”) before talking about how appropriate the Winner Takes All stipulation is because it’s the same thing for Lesnar. Brock is going to win and take it all, including Seth Rollins’ best shot. Lesnar took the Undertaker’s Streak and then last year he took the hopes and dreams from Roman Reigns when EVERYONE knew that Reigns was going to win.
This Sunday is for the fans who watch hockey for the fights, the fans who watch NASCAR for the crashes and the fans who watch soccer for the riots. On Sunday, Lesnar will have his foot on Rollins’ chest and then the two of them will go out to dinner to discuss Lesnar’s future. This brings out Rollins, who says Sunday is the biggest match for both of their careers because everyone from the fans to the locker room is sick of Brock.
Yeah Lesnar has made a fortune because he’s such an athletic freak and the most decorated athlete in combat sports history (not really) but Rollins could win. Lesnar goes to leave but Rollins kicks him low. That earns him a release German suplex but Rollins goes low again and hits the Stomp to leave Lesnar laying. I love that the only way to really hurt Lesnar is a low blow and no one really tries to do anything else.
Post break Rollins is in the back and doesn’t seem to care that he would get disqualified for what he did. Rollins: “Eh he had it coming.” Rollins isn’t a champion anyway. Yet.
IIconics/Nia Jax/Tamina vs. Beth Phoenix/Natalya/Boss N Hug Connection
The Brand Split takes another hit. Peyton starts for the villains and Sasha tags herself in so Beth can’t start. Banks trips on the bottom rope but is fine enough for a double elbow to give Bayley two on Royce. It’s off to Kay vs. Natalya with a suplex giving Natalya two. Beth comes in and pulls Kay by the hair to prevent the tag. Everything breaks down and the villains are sent outside as the good ones argue as we take a break.
Back with Bayley in trouble as the IIconics use a bit of a numbers advantage to take over. Nia and Tamina drop to the floor instead of taking the tag and Bayley gets over to the corner. Not to be outdone, Beth shoves Banks away and tags herself in so house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down again and Beth spears Tamina through the barricade. Things settle down to Beth slapping Peyton and getting Glam Slammed for the pin at 11:27.
Rating: C-. Beth looked good but is that really a surprise? She’s only 38 and was a talented performer in her time. That being said, this is going to be another match with way too much going on and no one having the chance to shine. They would have been better off leaving it as a triple threat or sending Nia and Tamina off to look for icebergs in the tropics to make it two on two. The spear through the barricade was cool, but not cool enough to make me care about the legends (Natalya is a legend?) and Samoans in the match.
Here’s hometown boy Batista to address HHH. He gets the spotlight treatment and a WELCOME BACK chant before pointing to the screen without saying a word. It’s a video on HHH vs. Batista, with HHH losing every single time and not knowing how to handle him. Back in the arena, Batista takes off his sunglasses, tells HHH to “kiss his a**”, puts his sunglasses back on, and leaves.
Elias is in front of MetLife Stadium, getting ready for the performance of his lifetime. He can hear the OH WALK WITH ELIAS chants from here but he’d rather have the fans shut their mouths. After Sunday, no one is going to be thinking of Lynch or Charlotte or Elias because it’s all about walking with Elias.
Apollo Crews vs. Jinder Mahal
Most of the people announced for the Andre the Giant Battle Royal is around the ring. Mahal takes him down into a chinlock less than thirty seconds in but Crews fights up with a dropkick into a nipup. The frog splash finishes Mahal at 1:36. This was a “hey we’re on the show too” moment.
Post match everyone wants to pose with the trophy and the fight begins. Titus O’Neil clears the ring but Mahal and the Singh Brothers throw him out. Crews tosses all three of them without much trouble, guaranteeing that he won’t win on Sunday.
Here’s Kurt Angle to say farewell to Raw. Angle is grateful for everything from the fans and from the bottom of his heart, he wants to say thank you. We get a video tribute to Angle, including his training for the Olympics and comments from legends before we even get into his WWE career. Thankfully we also get a look at his comedic antics, which were such an important part of his career. Then he hurt his neck again and had to leave, but he managed to make it back for the Hall of Fame induction. Excellent tribute, showing how incredible Angle really was when he was healthy.
Back in the arena and Angle is holding back tears as Baron Corbin comes out to interrupt. As the energy is sucked out of the arena, Corbin talks about how the video should have been in black and white because the man in the video isn’t the same as the man in the ring. Angle can’t hang with the stars of today, especially him. Corbin is tired of the fans complaining about him being Angle’s last opponent because nothing is changing.
That’s enough for Kurt, who offers Corbin an exhibition right now. Corbin goes to the apron but backs off saying that’s intensity without intelligence. He’ll just wait until Wrestlemania. This brings out Rey Mysterio (scheduled to face Angle tonight) to say he’ll face Corbin tonight instead. That’s not happening either, so Angle and Mysterio beat Corbin up.
Charlotte says she blindsided Asuka last week and she’ll do it again on Sunday. They had to change the match because she changed the game. Again.
Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Ricochet/Aleister Black
Ricochet and Black are challenging and Revival gets a jobbers’ entrance. Black takes Dawson into the corner to start but a snapmare gets Dawson out of trouble. A legsweep takes Dawson down and it’s off to Ricochet, who gets taken into the champs’ corner. It doesn’t bother Ricochet, who hurricanranas both of them at once with Wilder falling to the floor.
That leaves Dawson to take some knees to the face, with Wilder being hiptossed onto his partner for two. Dawson gets in a shot to the arm though and Black is sent outside as we take a break. Back with Dawson working on Black’s arm, even bending his fingers back for the bonus pain. Another legsweep gets Black out of trouble again but Wilder dives over to prevent the tag. The tag goes through a few seconds later and it’s Ricochet picking up the pace and cleaning house.
A victory roll gets two on Wilder but Dawson gets in a cheap shot from the floor to knock Ricochet into a Gory Bomb for another near fall. Black starts in with the strikes on the floor but gets taken down with a tornado DDT on the floor. That’s fine with Ricochet, who hits a crazy running flip dive over the corner. Ricochet tries to get back in but Dawson grabs his foot, meaning it’s a countout to retain the titles at 11:49.
Rating: C+. What does it say that WWE has turned me, a Revival fan, into someone who is wanting to see them lose the titles so they don’t have to be treated like garbage most of the time? I’m hoping we see the titles change hands soon, perhaps on next week’s show, but not at Wrestlemania because egads why would they belong on the show when they’ve been so wasted as of late?
Post match Black and Ricochet beat up the champs again. You can’t let them look strong you see.
Ronda Rousey is ready to fight and will destroy the Riott Squad by herself tonight.
We recap Braun Strowman’s issues with the SNL guys.
Tyler Breeze is talking to Alexa Bliss in the back as EC3 stands next to them and doesn’t seem impressed. Bliss takes credit for all of Wrestlemania’s success as EC3 cracks up and talks (I believe for the first time) about how funny Weekend Update was. Strowman comes in and asks what’s so funny. EC3 and Breeze point out two guys watching SNL on a tablet. Strowman doesn’t care what their names are because he’s calling them Michael Che and Colin Jost. Tonight, they’ll get these hands.
Roman Reigns doesn’t like rumors about not being ready for singles competition. He’ll put those rumors to….I have no idea actually as Drew McIntyre jumps him from behind and throws him into some crates.
Riott Squad vs. Ronda Rousey/Charlotte/Becky Lynch
Whoever betrays their partners first is out of Sunday’s main event. Before her entrance, Becky says she doesn’t want to hear from the loudmouth Charlotte or from Rousey with her God complex. Ronda and Charlotte talk about wanting to make history but Becky has to. Charlotte and Ruby start things off but Becky tags herself in and mocks the strut.
She even begs Charlotte to slap her in the face before sending Ruby outside as we take an early break. Back with Becky having to fight out of Logan’s standing Texas Cloverleaf and suplexing Morgan for two. Charlotte tags herself in and argues with Becky but Ronda tags herself in as well to yell at Charlotte as well. The armbar makes Morgan tap at 7:20.
Rating: D+. Angle advancement here as it should be as the Riott Squad loses AGAIN because that’s the only reason they exist. The women’s division needs to figure out how to use jobbers again because they don’t have the roster depth to make something like this work. It’s not like this means anything anyway, but how many times can the Squad lose before it loses all meaning?
Post match the fight is on until security breaks it up. That goes nowhere so here are the cops, with Ronda hitting one of them. That’s enough for an arrest but Becky attacks the cuffed Rousey. Becky is arrested as well so Charlotte goes after Becky and the Wrestlemania main event is all in handcuffs. They all kick at the cops’ legs as I have no idea what this is supposed to accomplish.
They’re all taken to police cars with Ronda and Becky in the same one so another fight breaks out with the window being kicked out. Charlotte gets in one more knee to Ronda’s head before the car is taken away. This was intense, but seeing the three of them in handcuffs and fighting each other felt like a rejected scene from a bad B movie rather than an effective wrestling angle. Just go with the classic locker room holding them back instead of going so far over the top with it.
Heavy Machinery vs. Chad Gable/Bobby Roode
Video on Kofi Kingston becoming #1 contender.
Braun Strowman vs. ???/???
Strowman throws them to the floor and hits the running shoulders. He does it a second time, followed by a powerslam each and then a double powerslam for the pin at 3:01.
Rating: F. Yes three minutes on a build towards a battle royal designed to get everyone on the show where it’s going to be about the SNL guys and Strowman is likely to lose. And all this before a Baron Corbin main event because WWE decides what we care about and is going to hammer it into us no matter what, because this is their idea of pushing Strowman the year after he teamed with a kid to win a match. Wrestlemania can be such a trying season and it’s stuff like this that makes it a chore at times.
Here are Bobby Lashley and Lio Rush to say they’re not worried about the Demon showing up at Wrestlemania because it’s just Balor in face paint. Balor pops up on screen (with smoke surrounding his face) to say he’s always had demons and at Wrestlemania, his demon will become Lashley’s nightmare. The Demon appears from behind the smoke and snarls.
As lame as it was to hear it referred to as “Finn Balor’s alter ego the Demon”, I can get behind the idea of advertising something like that in advance. What I can’t get behind though is the logic here. Balor can beat Rush and Lashley, or Lashley and Mahal, at the same time but he uses the Demon here? And not at the Royal Rumble against Brock for the title?
Rey Mysterio vs. Baron Corbin
It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and it’s Baron Corbin in the main event. Renee Young again gets it wrong by saying that it’s been over five years since Rey wrestled on Raw. Corbin gets knocked outside to start and we hit the pause button so Corbin call yell at fans. A suicide dive is blocked with a right hand though and we take a break. Back with Rey still in trouble and Corbin slowly stomping away. Rey seems to have hurt his knee so Corbin takes him outside and sends him into the barricade.
Back inside and Rey kicks him with the good leg, only to get thrown into the air and dropped face first down. Corbin sends him face first into the post as the slow, boring match continues. Rey fights back again and headscissors Corbin into the 619 but misses the frog splash. Deep Six finishes Mysterio (the #1 contender to the US Title, after the US Champion was pinned by Angle last week) at 13:35.
Rating: D. I don’t remember the last time I was so sick of a wrestler as I am of Baron Corbin. He wins here (because the US Title is so unimportant to this company that it might as well be the WCW Title) and then he’ll lose on Sunday but be right back on Raw the next night getting beaten up again by someone else. Heaven forbid we give ANYONE else a chance in a spot like this so he can’t kill off a show. At this point, Angle vs. Corbin should be for the US Title, but I’m sure it’s something we just need to stop thinking about because wins and losses don’t matter, except for when wins and losses matter.
Post match Angle comes out and makes Corbin tap to the ankle lock on the stage.
One more look at the triple arrest ends the show.
Overall Rating: C-. The first two hours or so of this show were a heck of a go home show for Wrestlemania, with the stories being treated as important, some nice angle advancement and even a few surprises. Then it went flying off the rails in a blaze of negative glory as soon as we got to whatever is left of Braun Strowman and then Baron Corbin, who WWE thinks is the greatest heel in recent history. There are good ideas here and it made me like Wrestlemania a bit more, but when WWE gets obsessed with an idea, it can drag down a show like nothing else. That happened here, and it makes me scared for Sunday.
Results
Beth Phoenix/Natalya/Boss N Hug Connection b. IIconics/Nia Jax/Tamina
Apollo Crews b. Jinder Mahal – Frog splash
Revival b. Ricochet/Aleister Black via countout
Ronda Rousey/Charlotte/Becky Lynch b. Riott Squad – Armbar to Morgan
Heavy Machinery b. Chad Gable/Bobby Roode – Compactor to Gable
Braun Strowman b. ???/??? – Double powerslam
Baron Corbin b. Rey Mysterio – Deep Six
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
So That’s Their Big Solution
They changed the main event of Wrestlemania.To exactly what people thought it would be. It’s now Winner Take All, which is the solution to everything. There was no reason to confuse the casual fans by having Becky beat Ronda to win the Raw Women’s Title and then have Charlotte leave with the Smackdown belt. Make it winner take all and then figure out a way to get the belts apart (or not, preferably) later. Good move and Stephanie was done talking in about three minutes to make it even better.
Main Event – March 28, 2019: I Need Three Square Meals
IMG Credit: WWE
Main Event
Date: March 28, 2019
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Percy Watson, Byron Saxton, Renee Young
We’re long since in the home stretch towards Wrestlemania and that means we have a lot of recapping to do. I’m not sure what the point is in having these original matches when there is more stuff that could be done, but why mess with what….well I guess it’s worked somewhat over the rest of the year. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
Opening sequence.
EC3 vs. Tyler Breeze
Breeze has gotten a haircut and hits a dropkick into an early chinlock. That’s reversed into a seated full nelson which is reversed with a jawbreaker as Renee seems to approve of EC3’s physique. There’s the EC3 Elbow but a powerbomb is countered into a superkick for two. Breeze’s hurricanrana gets the same but it’s the 1%er for the pin on Breeze at 4:48.
Rating: D. What else were you expecting here? For the life of me I can’t get my head around the idea that EC3 is already banished to this show. How much trouble can you possibly get into in all of two matches? There must be some kind of backstage issue with him as otherwise it’s just a waste of a talented performer.
We look at the announcement of the Raw Women’s Title match main eventing Wrestlemania. That’s still so weird to say.
From Smackdown.
Smackdown Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Charlotte
Asuka is defending and the announcers are rather stunned. They fight over wrist control to start until Asuka grabs a headlock. A shot to the ribs puts Charlotte on the floor and we take a break. Back with Asuka getting two off a sunset flip but getting kicked in the knee. Asuka shrugs off the kicks and hits a hip attack in the corner, followed by a sliding basement dropkick for two. Another hip attack misses and Charlotte kicks her in the face. Charlotte’s moonsault is countered into the Asuka Lock with a rollup getting Charlotte out of trouble.
Back from a second break with Asuka getting two more off another kick to the head. Asuka heads up top but gets caught in a super Spanish Fly for a rather near fall in a spot you almost never see on the main shows. The followup takes too long though and it’s a triangle choke from Asuka, which is reversed into a sitout powerbomb (What else would it be?). The Figure Eight gives Charlotte the title at 15:52.
Rating: B. Another very good match from these two as they work well together, but that’s quite the curve ball for the main event. Odds are this leads to a unified title, which is the best thing for everyone right now. You have Asuka, Rousey, Becky and Charlotte at the moment and if Rousey is leaving, there’s no need for two titles between three big stars. Let the rest of the division fight over the Tag Team Titles and go with the traveling champion, as it’s best for everyone.
From Raw.
Here’s Drew McIntyre with a clip from two weeks ago when he attacked Roman Reigns. Then last week he challenged Roman to a match at Wrestlemania. Back in the arena, Drew says he hopes someone got through to Reigns because he’s already beaten Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins. Now he’s going to appeal to Joe the man, the husband and the father. Reigns has already been through enough because they’ve already watched their dad fight for his life. Do they want to see him go through it again at Wrestlemania when he’s going to lose this time?
This brings out Reigns to say that he accepts, but this is coming from Joe: don’t ever run your mouth about his wife and kids. The fight is on with Reigns getting the better of it until a low blow and Claymore take Roman out. Just in case you didn’t get the idea, we see a replay of the high points a few seconds after.
Wrestlemania rundown. I’d recommend packing breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Heavy Machinery vs. Ascension
Tucker and Konnor start things off with Konnor driving him into the corner so Viktor can come off the top with a sunset flip. That’s fine with Otis, who comes in for the double running knee to Viktor’s head. Otis slugs away in the corner but another blind tag to Viktor lets him low bridge Otis to the floor to take over.
Back from a break with Konnor dropping a knee for two and bringing Viktor in (this time minus the blind factor) for some shots to the ribs. The chinlock lasts all of five seconds before Konnor goes with right hands in the corner. A double clothesline gets Otis out of trouble and it’s back to Tucker for the spirited comeback. Everything breaks down and Otis busts out the Caterpillar to a very strong reaction. So that’s over at least. The Compactor finishes Viktor at 11:17.
Rating: D. Now Heavy Machinery being on this show makes some more sense as the fans are going to react to them, just due to that weird charisma they have. Well that Otis has at least. Ascension is long past being a lost cause so this was just a Heavy Machinery showcase. That’s fine, but it doesn’t work when they’re beaten down for most of the match.
We wrap it up with clips of the falls in the tag team gauntlet match from Smackdown, finishing things up with Vince McMahon saying that Kofi Kingston is going to Wrestlemania. His wording here is a little weird and it wouldn’t shock me to see them change things up yet again, because WWE doesn’t like fans being happy for some reason.
Overall Rating: C+. This one is going to depend on how you liked this week’s big stories and those were good enough to make me want to watch Wrestlemania just a little bit more. The problem with that is the show is going to include so much more stuff that wasn’t even touched on here. In other words, as always, the problem comes down to the show being way too long.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Smackdown – March 26, 2019: Fresh Afternoon
IMG Credit: WWE
Smackdown
Date: March 26, 2019
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips
Ok it has to be tonight right? I mean it has to be. Tonight has to be the setup for Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan for Wrestlemania. Now when I say has to be, I mean it should be but probably won’t be as WWE is likely waiting until the very last possible chance to make the match for some reason. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
Here’s New Day to get things going. That means a lot of chanting for Kofi, which shouldn’t be very surprising at this point. If Woods could be serious for a minute, the last few months have been an emotional roller coaster and the fans have been here from NEW DAY SUCKS to NEW DAY ROCKS. It’s been worth every bit of it and the KOFI/NEW DAY ROCKS chants begin.
However, given all the obstacles places in Kofi’s path, they’re considering walking away from WWE. Kofi has been treated badly for eleven years and he’s lived the power of positivity the whole time. They can’t make a decision until they get answers and they would need to be from Mr. McMahon. Therefore, they’re not leaving the ring until Vince comes out here. Cue Vince but before he can say anything, Daniel Bryan and Rowan interrupt instead. Bryan says New Day is a stale novelty act that Vince created and all he has to do is bring up three people from NXT, call them Fresh Afternoon and have them throw waffles into the crowd.
Kofi is a loser and Vince shouldn’t let Big E. and Woods get in his head. Vince has been right to keep Kofi out of the title picture and the people refuse to accept that reality. Bryan and Kofi argue about who is the hypocrite but Vince wants everyone to shut up. He doesn’t like the threats of quitting that were never going to happen.
Vince still sees Kofi as a B+ player but the question is if New Day is a B+ tag team. There is a way for Kofi to get to Wrestlemania: Big E./Xavier have to win….a tag team gauntlet match. Are they really managing to be this lazy on the Road to Wrestlemania? Doing three gauntlet matches in about seven weeks is their brilliant idea?
In the back, Becky Lynch talks about how she’s bringing the people and Ronda Rousey is bringing the title, but what does Charlotte bring? Charlotte comes out to the ring and says she’ll show you how worthy she is.
Smackdown Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Charlotte
Asuka is defending and the announcers are rather stunned. They fight over wrist control to start until Asuka grabs a headlock. A shot to the ribs puts Charlotte on the floor and we take a break. Back with Asuka getting two off a sunset flip but getting kicked in the knee. Asuka shrugs off the kicks and hits a hip attack in the corner, followed by a sliding basement dropkick for two. Another hip attack misses and Charlotte kicks her in the face. Charlotte’s moonsault is countered into the Asuka Lock with a rollup getting Charlotte out of trouble.
Back from a second break with Asuka getting two more off another kick to the head. Asuka heads up top but gets caught in a super Spanish Fly for a rather near fall in a spot you almost never see on the main shows. The followup takes too long though and it’s a triangle choke from Asuka, which is reversed into a sitout powerbomb (What else would it be?). The Figure Eight gives Charlotte the title at 15:52.
Rating: B. Another very good match from these two as they work well together, but that’s quite the curve ball for the main event. Odds are this leads to a unified title, which is the best thing for everyone right now. You have Asuka, Rousey, Becky and Charlotte at the moment and if Rousey is leaving, there’s no need for two titles between three big stars. Let the rest of the division fight over the Tag Team Titles and go with the traveling champion, as it’s best for everyone.
With Asuka down on the floor, Kurt Angle comes out for his match. Way to make the women look important there guys.
AJ Styles is honored to be Kurt Angle’s final Smackdown opponent and isn’t taking this match lightly.
AJ Styles vs. Kurt Angle
They shake hands and hug before the match before AJ pulls him down into the Calf Crusher. Angle is about to tap but hangs on long enough to reverse it into the ankle lock. AJ sends him into the corner for the break and here’s Randy Orton with an RKO to Styles for the DQ at 1:30. NOW WHY COULDN’T THEY DO THAT WITH SAMOA JOE LAST NIGHT???
Post match Angle gives Orton the Angle Slam, dropping him on the way to the mat.
Rey Mysterio and his son Dominick say that Samoa Joe isn’t going to have a good time at Wrestlemania when Rey becomes the new US Champion.
Here’s Miz for a chat, but first he needs to agree with the MIZ IS AWESOME chants. We’re twelve days away from Wrestlemania and the only thing he can imagine is ripping Shane McMahon limb from limb. Miz wants to hurt Shane so badly that he wants to change things a bit by making it a Falls Count Anywhere match. This brings out Shane, albeit behind a group of security guards and various midcarders. After having the ring announcer do a well done introduction, Shane says Miz sounds as dumb as his father looked.
We see an image from Fastlane of Shane grabbing Miz’s dad by the face with Shane saying it makes him feel better every time he sees it. Shane loved hurting Miz’s dad to the point where it was euphoric. Therefore, the stipulation is accepted, though Shane says he made a mistake of not hurting Miz even more. It was the biggest mistake since Miz’s father impregnated his mother.
Miz beats up the security and the wrestlers (to be fair it was Sanity and Shelton Benjamin) as Shane watches from the stage. A dive off the barricade lets Miz beat then into the crowd in a rather strong moment. They’re getting twenty minutes at Wrestlemania aren’t they? They’ve presented the thing as the third biggest match on the show so far.
We look back at the opening segment.
We look back at the Women’s Title match.
We look back at the SNL guys agreeing to enter the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal.
The IIconics are excited to be in the Women’s Tag Team Title match.
Tag Team Gauntlet Match
If New Day wins, Kofi gets his title shot at Wrestlemania. Big E./Xavier Woods are in first and Anderson and Gallows are in second. Woods goes straight at Anderson to start and it’s UpUpDownDown for the elimination at 49 seconds, which isn’t even enough time for me to make fun of Anderson and Gallows for still being around.
Rusev and Shinsuke Nakamura are in third as a crowd is gathering to watch backstage, including the Hardys, Rey Mysterio and Becky Lynch. Woods headscissors Nakamura down but misses a Stinger Splash in the corner. That lets Nakamura hit the running knee in the corner and Woods is sent outside as we take a break.
Back with Good Vibrations and a knee drop getting two as the audience has grown. The reverse exploder is countered and it’s Big E. coming in for some overhead belly to bellies. The Warrior Splash looks to set up the Big Ending but Big E. gets sent outside. That means a whip into the steps for Rusev but he’s fine enough for the Machka Kick back inside. Woods is back in for a dive onto Rusev as Kinshasa misses. Nakamura goes into the post and UpUpDownDown pins Nakamura at 9:27 total.
The Bar is in fourth and we’re joined in progress with Sheamus working on Big E.’s leg before handing it off to Cesaro. That means the Swing into the Sharpshooter but Big E. kicks him out to the floor. The hot tag is broken up but Big E. manages to fight them both off and, after a backdrop to Cesaro, the hot tag brings in Woods. Everything breaks down and it’s a big flip dive onto the Bar. A guillotine legdrop gets two on Cesaro with Sheamus diving in for a save.
Back from another break with Big E. caught in a half crab from Cesaro but Sheamus charges into a powerbomb. It’s back to Woods, who dives into an uppercut for two. The spike White Noise is broken up though and it’s a rollup to pin Sheamus at 23:55. We’re not done though as the Bar takes out Big E. and powerbomb him through a table.
The Usos are in fifth and want Big E. to get up and fight. Hang on though as Jimmy grabs a mic and says the Usos have fought wars against the New Day. Kofi deserves the shot so since he’s already earned respect from everyone….so the Usos forfeit at 26:23. We cut to the back where Bryan and Rowan freak out and wreck their locker room (that’s a lot of chairs for two people).
Back from another break with Rowan and Daniel Bryan being announced as the final team. Big E. can barely stand so Bryan wraps his leg around the post as Rowan crossbodies Woods. We settle down to a regular match with Bryan stomping on Big E. and grabbing something like an ankle lock/half crab hybrid. Big E. gets over for the hot tag to Big E. anyway and it’s a flip dive onto Rowan.
The Rock Bottom out of the corner plants Bryan and the Big Ending connects but Rowan makes the save. The claw slam gets two and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. Woods is back up with a tornado DDT off the steps to drop Bryan and Rowan goes into the post twice in a row. A clothesline sends Rowan over the table and Big E. turns it on top of him to win via countout at 37:49.
Rating: C+. I liked this one better with the slightly shorter length and some more creative ways to end some falls. Above all else, the champions involved didn’t get pinned, which is a lot better than what I was expecting. The problem is I also expect New Day to turn on Kofi for getting him into the match and leaving him with the glory.
A rather calm Vince gets in his limo and says Kofi is going to Wrestlemania to face Daniel Bryan for the title.
The locker room comes out to celebrate with Kofi to end the show.
Overall Rating: B+. Well they nailed this one for the most part, assuming you don’t mind a strong curve in Charlotte winning the title. Kofi FINALLY being set up for the title match is a great thing, though I don’t think he gets the title. I’m rather relieved that they didn’t have Angle go over AJ and they even threw in some storyline advancement. Throw in no mention of the Women’s Battle Royal or the Smackdown Tag Team Title matches and I’m very pleased.
Results
Charlotte b. Asuka – Figure Eight
AJ Styles b. Kurt Angle via DQ when Randy Orton interfered
New Day won a gauntlet match last eliminating Daniel Bryan and Rowan
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Main Event – March 21, 2019: SERIOUSLY???
IMG Credit: WWE
Main Event
Date: March 21, 2019
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Percy Watson
As tends to be the case around this year, it’s time to hurry things along as we have to build up Wrestlemania in a hurry since WWE feels the need to add things in as fast as they can. I’m not sure what to expect here, but I’d assume some short matches that don’t mean much will be included. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
Opening sequence.
Rezar vs. Curt Hawkins
Zack Ryder is here to counter the force that is Drake Maverick. Hawkins charges straight at him but gets shoved down and a fall away slam makes things even worse. Back in and Rezar hammers in some crossface forearms and the chinlock goes on. A side slam gets two and we hit the neck crank. Hawkins fights up for some dropkicks as the fans are behind him here. A superkick to the ribs into a DDT gets two and another DDT sets up the top rope elbow for another near fall. Rezar is right back up and the chokeslam finishes Hawkins at 5:53.
Rating: D. I’m getting into Hawkins more every week and that’s rather impressive considering what he’s been doing for about two and a half years now. He’s trying to get this over and it takes a lot to get fans into a character that has no chance of winning. The big win is going to be a cool moment, though I’ve been saying that for over a year now.
From Raw.
Raw Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Dana Brooke
Ronda is defending and if there is any justice in the world, Dana shouldn’t lay a finger on her and then lose in about thirty seconds. Rousey knees her in the face, knees her in the ribs and the armbar finishes Brooke in 19 seconds.
Rousey won’t let go of the arm until some referees come out. Ronda beats them up too and goes over to her husband, who hits a guard for trying to hold her back. Browne pulls Ronda over the barricade.
From Smackdown.
It’s time for the KO Show with Kevin Owens talking about how tonight is all about Kofi Kingston. He’ll be watching the gauntlet match closely, but for now we need to get to the guests. That would be Becky Lynch and Charlotte with Owens talking about how Becky is willing to fight Charlotte and Ronda Rousey at the same time.
As for Charlotte, Becky has said that she was shoehorned into the match and doesn’t belong. What Owens knows is that everyone is sick of hearing them talk and want to see the two of them fight. They stand up, Owens, leaves, and the fight is on. Security and referee get beaten up as well as the fans are very pleased with Becky.
We look at Drew McIntyre attacking Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose.
From Raw.
Drew McIntyre vs. Seth Rollins
The fight is on in the aisle with referees and security out to break it up. Joined in progress with Drew pulling him down into an armbar with the pressure on the face. A hard shot to the face keeps Rollins in trouble and they head outside, where Seth misses a moonsault off the steps to send us to a break. Back with Drew stomping on Seth’s back as it’s all McIntyre so far.
Rating: B. This was starting to rock at the end and as tired as I am of that ending, it did what it needed to accomplish. Lesnar gets to prove that he’s smart enough to mess with Rollins and McIntyre looks strong before going on to face Reigns. Lesnar’s distraction might not have been inspired stuff, but at least it went the right way after a pretty awesome match while it lasted.
From Raw.
Batista joins us via satellite and says he doesn’t like HHH. He’s wanted one more match with HHH but can’t get his attention. Batista has heard about how he owes his career to HHH but all HHH ever did was groom him to be the muscle. There’s more to him than just being a meathead and it was HHH who caused him to quit nine years ago. There were goals that Batista wanted to accomplish but HHH was cutting him off. Now look at what Batista has accomplished since leaving WWE.
Cole defends HHH but Batista doesn’t buy it. HHH is a cerebral assassin and now he’s gotten in Cole’s head too. The real HHH is a manipulative control freak so hopefully Vince McMahon fires him one day and ends his corporate career. Then at Wrestlemania, Batista can end his in-ring career. Interview over. That’s the explanation I’ve been waiting on and it cleared up enough to make the story work. It’s still a stretch, but at least it’s a story that can make sense.
Wrestlemania rundown.
Titus O’Neil/Lucha House Party vs. Revival/Ascension
SERIOUSLY??? This is what the Revival has been reduced to less than a month before Wrestlemania??? We take a break at the bell because no one cares about this show. Back with Kalisto in trouble in the corner but kneeing his way out of Konnor’s suplex attempt. The hot tag brings in Titus to clean house with the Clash of the Titus finishing Viktor at 6:43. Nowhere near enough shown to rate but the Revival did not need to be slumming it like this.
We get clips of Kofi Kingston’s gauntlet match.
From Smackdown.
Post match Big E. and Woods come out to celebrate and here’s Vince McMahon to interrupt. Vince congratulates Kofi, who is going to Wrestlemania….if he can beat one more person. That would be Daniel Bryan, who kicks away in the corner to start. A knee to the ribs cuts off Kofi’s comeback and Bryan ties him in the Tree of Woe for more kicks to the ribs.
Bryan gets two off a top rope belly to back superplex and we hit the LeBell Lock. Kofi gets a foot on the rope for the break The YES Kicks are countered into the SOS for two and the fans gasp on the kickout. Some running corner dropkicks connect with Kofi reversing the third into another rollup. Bryan avoids a spinning high crossbody and stomps away at the head and it’s the running knee for the pin at 1:00:06 total.
Rating: B. It was long and exactly as advertised, but if this company EVER stopped moving the goalposts, I think my head would explode. It’s the same thing as the Becky Lynch story where the evil boss just feels like being evil and changes the match. I’m sure Kofi will get the title shot, but we’re long past the point of this being surprising. It’s just the move that WWE makes and that’s not a good thing.
The match itself was however a good thing with Kofi showing that he can hang in there for a long time at a high quality, which is exactly what he’s done for years. The fans want to see him, but you can only keep doing this “HAHA EVIL BOSS” stuff before it stops mattering. Considering that it’s happening in two big matches, it’s rather taxing and downright annoying.
New Day checks on Kofi to end the show.
Overall Rating: C+. Now this is more like it with Main Event as we get a nice balance between the two shows instead of everything from Raw for a change. Wrestlemania season is the part of the year that matters most and in this case we actually got a nice set of recaps. The original content was rather terrible but it’s not like that matters in the slightest. Nice show this week, which is more than I would have bet on.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Monday Night Raw – March 25, 2019: Sometimes I Wonder
IMG Credit: WWE
Monday Night Raw
Date: March 25, 2019
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young
We’re down to less than two weeks before Wrestlemania and the big story today (and one of the biggest in recent years) is that the Raw Women’s Title match will be headlining the show. It’s hard to fathom that something like this could actually happen, but that’s the case now and I really can’t believe I’m seeing it. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
We open with a discussion of the main event being announced, which is quite the sight to behold.
The Riott Squad comes out as the opponents for Ronda, Becky and Charlotte but here’s Becky for a rebuttal first. Becky talks about how Ronda was handed everything when she came in but no one cared until the Man came around. At Wrestlemania, the night will end with Ronda’s title over Becky’s head and Ronda’s head under Becky’s boot. Now it’s Charlotte interrupting, saying that it’s not the last six months for Becky or the last year for Ronda, but everything since Charlotte debuted.
Beat the Clock Challenge: Ronda Rousey vs. Sarah Logan
This is the first of three matches with the competition being won by whomever has the fastest time. Logan bails to the floor to start and the chase is on until Sarah dives back inside. A modified Texas Cloverleaf has Rousey in trouble until she makes the rope. That means a Superman elbow to the face and the armbar to make Logan tap at 1:25.
Beat the Clock Challenge: Charlotte vs. Ruby Riott
Charlotte misses a running big boot to start and nearly gets thrown outside. Natural Selection misses as well and Ruby hits a quick Downward Spiral. The Riott Kick is countered into the Figure Eight but time expires at 1:25.
Beat the Clock Challenge: Becky Lynch vs. Liv Morgan
Charlotte boots Becky in the face before the clock starts and the screaming Morgan stomps in the corner. We hit the early chinlock as Rousey is looking confident on the stage. Becky rolls away and fires off the uppercuts. A kick to the ribs looks to set up the Disarm-Her but Becky gets rolled into the corner. Morgan goes for the leg but gets rolled up to give Becky the fast pin at 1:18 to win the challenge. This was a good idea as the wrestling didn’t mean anything, but Becky winning a match that plays into Ronda’s claim to fame is a smart way to go about things.
Finn Balor vs. Bobby Lashley/Lio Rush
If Balor wins, he gets a title shot at Wrestlemania. Rush is in street clothes though and says that he’s not medically cleared to compete thanks to Braun Strowman. Therefore, we have a replacement.
Finn Balor vs. Bobby Lashley/Jinder Mahal
If Balor wins, he gets an Intercontinental Title shot at Wrestlemania. The Singh Brothers offer an early distraction and Balor gets clotheslined to the floor as we take a fast break. Back with Balor making a comeback until the Singh Brothers trip him from the floor. That just means a big flip dive onto all four, followed by the Coup de Grace to pin Mahal at 4:47. Not enough shown to rate but it did exactly what it should have and needed to.
Elias is in Time Square for a performance when a guitar player comes up and sings. That’s enough for Elias, who is going to focus on headlining Wrestlemania.
Revival vs. Ricochet/Aleister Black
Non-title. It’s a brawl before the bell to start with Ricochet kicking Dawson to the floor and Wilder joining him in a hurry. The NXT chants begin (which would apply more to the Revival than Black/Ricochet) and we get the opening bell with Dawson sending Black into the corner. Black kicks his way out of a hammerlock and brings Ricochet in to pick up the pace. The Revival is sent to the floor and it’s the moonsault from Black, followed by one from Ricochet which barely makes contact.
Back from a break with Ricochet taking a double suplex but getting in a kick to the face for the tag off to Black. That means more kicks and a double standing Lionsault but Dawson takes him into the corner to regain control. It doesn’t last long though as Black Mass knocks Wilder silly, setting up the 630 for the pin at 8:38.
Rating: C. Not a bad match and it can set up something for Wrestlemania, but egads man come up with something other than having the champs lose. If WWE is so scared of having people leave, maybe not having them lose like this could entice Revival to stick around. Also, as weakened as the titles are at this point, do they belong on Wrestlemania? Against two people who haven’t been on the main roster for three months yet?
Here’s Drew McIntyre with a clip from two weeks ago when he attacked Roman Reigns. Then last week he challenged Roman to a match at Wrestlemania. Back in the arena, Drew says he hopes someone got through to Reigns because he’s already beaten Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins. Now he’s going to appeal to Joe the man, the husband and the father. Reigns has already been through enough because they’ve already watched their dad fight for his life. Do they want to see him go through it again at Wrestlemania when he’s going to lose this time?
This brings out Reigns to say that he accepts, but this is coming from Joe: don’t ever run your mouth about his wife and kids. The fight is on with Reigns getting the better of it until a low blow and Claymore take Roman out. Just in case you didn’t get the idea, we see a replay of the high points a few seconds after.
Post break McIntyre runs into Ambrose (Wasn’t he supposed to….leave?), who didn’t like being called a cockroach. Dean wants a Last Man Standing match tonight and it’s on.
Sasha Banks vs. Natalya
Bayley and Beth Phoenix are at ringside. Natalya doesn’t waste time in going after Sasha and it’s an early surfboard hold. That’s broken up with a rollup, though Natalya is right back with one of her own. They head outside with Natalya being sent into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Banks kicking at the ribs and slapping on the Bank Statement. That’s broken up and Natalya gets the Sharpshooter for a long crawl to the ropes. Cue Nia Jax and Tamina for the no contest at 8:48.
Rating: C-. It wasn’t bad while it lasted but then HEY! IT’S TIME FOR NIA AND TAMINA! Why these two have to be involved is beyond me but that’s never stopped WWE before and it’s not going to here. As annoying as they are, they’re going to be around and I’m sure they’ll be around after they lose, because that’s the only way WWE knows how to book them.
Post match the brawl is on with Beth hitting a Glam Slam on Tamina to send the monsters running. Beth and Natalya stare down at Bayley and Banks.
Hart Foundation Hall of Fame video. Back in the arena, Natalya is in tears and points to the sky.
Kurt Angle is happy to have his last match in Boston tonight when Baron Corbin comes in to mock him for sticking around so long. Angle: “Screw you.”
Bayley and Banks aren’t happy with the interference so they’ll take on everyone at Wrestlemania.
It’s time for A Moment Of Bliss, this time in the ring. She’s very happy about everything that has happened since she was announced as the host of Wrestlemania, but not everything has gone that well. We look at Braun Strowman’s issues with the SNL guys before Strowman is here as the guest. Bliss recaps everything that Strowman has done to various cars and asks what would happen if Strowman were to give them his hands.
That would be severe pain, which Bliss says is the first step in the healing process. Bliss brings in her seconds guests (via satellite): the SNL guys, who are soundly booed. Colin Jost apologizes for putting on a Mets hat last time and puts on a Yankees hat instead. Michael Che accuses Strowman of crossing the line and Jost makes jokes about the college admission scandal. Maybe he could teach Strowman something, like how to be an adult.
They want to make this right and all it takes is repayment for the car and an autograph from Brock Lesnar. Strowman has a better idea: Jost enters the Andre the Giant battle royal. Or maybe he can just stay backstage and let Strowman take care of this himself. Jost is eventually convinced but decides that Che is in too. Bliss makes it official and the two of them panic. I’ll definitely take this over some unfunny segment that gets extra time.
Elias is in front of Madison Square Garden, which isn’t quite the Garden in Boston, but he’ll sell it out faster than Billy Joel will. He’s having a cup of tea and someone puts a quarter in it. That seems to give Elias an idea.
Baron Corbin vs. Apollo Crews
Corbin gets a special intro, listing off his accomplishments and announcing him as Boston’s favorite son. Crews starts fast and dropkicks Corbin to the floor for the apron moonsault. Back in and Corbin slams him down to take over as Renee and Graves argue over whether or not they should make fun of Corbin for getting the match against Angle. Crews is right back with an enziguri and the frog splash for two. End of Days wraps up Crews at 2:46.
We recap the Beat the Clock Challenge.
Next week: Rousey/Lynch/Charlotte vs. Riott Squad.
Here’s Seth Rollins for a chat. He and Brock Lesnar are not cut from the same mold and they’re taking different paths forward. Rollins wants the burden that comes with being champion so he can inspire people. When he was a kid, he was inspired by Shawn Michaels, Bret Hart, Ric Flair, HHH and John Cena. Brock Lesnar doesn’t inspire people that way and that’s not what Rollins wants. Yesterday he had an autograph signing and everyone told him to beat Lesnar at Wrestlemania.
This brings out Paul Heyman and my eyes roll as this feels so old hat. Heyman thanks Rollins for making the Wrestlemania title match a handicap match with Rollins and the people teaming up against Lesnar. Heyman likes the odds because Rollins is just begging for the support. What’s next? Asking for thoughts and prayers because he’s undersized and overconfident? Heyman hopes Rollins loses so that everyone can take it personal. That’s it for Paul, but Rollins charges up the ramp and scares him down. Rollins promises to burn Suplex City down. This was every not great Heyman promo you’ve heard for nearly two years.
Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe
Non-title. I love it when the Brand Split is thrown completely out the window during Wrestlemania season. Joe says he forgot his bow of flowers but he was never that sentimental in the first place. His gift instead: a good night’s sleep when Joe chokes him out. Joe blocks an early German suplex attempt and sends Angle outside for a suicide dive.
Back from an early break with Angle in trouble but managing to roll the German suplexes. A running boot to the chest sets up the running backsplash but Angle…..ok there’s no snapping off to it but he gets the Angle Slam for two more. Joe on the other hand snaps off the powerslam, only to have Angle slip away and hit a missile dropkick. Angle Angle Slam is escaped and Joe gets the Koquina Clutch, with Angle dropping back into a cradle for the pin at 8:59.
Rating: D. Well of course. I mean OF COURSE you have the US Champion lose here to give Angle a feel good moment in a match to cap off a rivalry that ISN’T FROM THIS COMPANY. This is the kind of thing that WWE brings on itself and doesn’t get why it’s a bad idea. Joe just lost to Angle, who can barely move, and now I’m supposed to buy that he’s a threat to Rey Mysterio? Why? Just because he has the US Title?
This match didn’t need to happen or at the very, very least, didn’t need to be a clean fall. A countout was an impossibility here? I’m sure having the third champion lose tonight was the better call instead. And they wonder why no one cares about titles anymore and haven’t in a long time.
Here’s HHH for a chat. Before he gets to Batista, he praises the women getting to the main event of Wrestlemania because they’ve all earned it and it’s the ultimate goal. HHH talks about being glad that he didn’t get the microphone that Batista spit on, but he has something else to see. That would be a letter….which HHH can’t get out of his pocket. HHH: “I’m doing the job for the envelope in my pocket!”
It’s a letter from Batista’s lawyers, saying that he won’t be wrestling at Wrestlemania unless certain conditions are met. Batista talked about a lot of things, including figuring out that Evolution just existing to keep the World Title on HHH a little while longer. HHH: “Dave had a big week. He realized that and figured out that the moon isn’t made of cheese!” Batista also said that Evolution didn’t do anything for him.
When Batista joined Evolution, he was the Deacon and carried around a collection plate for D-Von Dudley. Evolution kept him from having a successful career. Six World Titles later, he left when he found out he couldn’t beat John Cena. Then he said HHH’s obsession made him quit again, just because he wouldn’t answer Batista’s phone calls. HHH called him back and Batista’s manager asked if HHH would move Wrestlemania to better accommodate his shooting schedule.
The letter finally got to the point: Batista wanted HHH to give him what he wanted. What he really wanted. What he really, really wanted. This goes on for two pages (to the tune of Wannabe by the Spice Girls if that isn’t clear) until it’s finally announced that HHH’s career had to be on the line. Batista beat up a seventy year old man to get HHH on the grandest stage of them all and that’s what HHH gave him. Now Batista is trying to quit again by making HHH put his career on the line but HHH isn’t letting him out of things that easily.
See, if HHH can’t beat a “self diluted douchebag” like Batista, he doesn’t belong in the ring. His career is on the line. This was hilarious with me laughing out loud multiple times. The problem is that’s the completely wrong direction to go for the feud, as HHH’s mentor and idol was beaten down. He shouldn’t be trying to be funny here (though he was really good at it).
Elias has collected thousands of dollars for performing….but he spends too much time bragging and a guy comes up to steal it. Then he steals the guitar case. Elias isn’t worried because he’ll make more money when he performs at Wrestlemania.
Dean Ambrose vs. Drew McIntyre
Last Man Standing. Drew chops him down to start and sends things to the floor, including a swing into the barricade. Back from a break with Dean hitting a top rope ax handle but getting beaten up with a kendo stick to the ribs. Dean is right back up though and knocks Drew to the floor for a suicide dive.
The Glasgow Kiss drops Dean again and a steps shot to the head makes it even worse. A chair is brought inside and wedged into the corner, of course with Drew going face first into it after having set it up. Dirty Deeds gives Dean an eight count and it’s time to hammer away some more. Dean grabs a table but gets thrown through it in the corner. That’s good for a nine count and the Claymore is good for the ten at 9:55.
Rating: C. This didn’t have much time to go anywhere and was one of the most obvious endings you could have. That being said, it’s also the most logical way to go as Dean doesn’t seem to be sticking around (though he keeps popping up). McIntyre beating up Reigns’ Shield buddies is a good way to go and it gives him some actual momentum heading into Wrestlemania.
Overall Rating: D+. I’m not sure what to think of this one as the wrestling was nothing great, but the pace of the show was excellent with nothing dragging and none of the stories getting too much time. The promos were good (albeit repetitive in some cases) and advanced or addressed the stories….but then there’s the problem on the show. Of the five matches involving champions, the champions went 1-3-1, with Rousey getting the lone win. I have no idea why that needed to be the case less than two weeks before Wrestlemania, but Raw has never been the most logical show in the world.
Results
Ronda Rousey b. Sarah Logan – Armbar
Charlotte vs. Ruby Riott went to a time limit draw
Becky Lynch b. Liv Morgan – Rollup
Finn Balor b. Bobby Lashley/Jinder Mahal – Coup de Grace to Mahal
Ricochet/Aleister Black b. Revival – 630 to Wilder
Natalya vs. Sasha Banks went to a no contest when Tamina and Nia Jax interfered
Baron Corbin b. Apollo Crews – End of Days
Kurt Angle b. Samoa Joe – Rollup
Drew McIntyre b. Dean Ambrose – Ambrose couldn’t answer the ten count
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Main Event – March 14, 2019: This Would Get A Positive Job Report
IMG Credit: WWE
Main Event
Date: March 14, 2019
Location: PPG Paints Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Renee Young, Percy Watson, Byron Saxton
It’s recap week during one of the most important times of the year. I wouldn’t mind if they just dropped the original stuff during this season as it’s just taking up time when they could talk about more important things. Then again Main Event has never made the most sense in the first place. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
Opening sequence.
EC3 vs. Tyler Breeze
Did Breeze forget to go to the tanning bed this week? He looks like Aiden English. EC3 elbows him in the face to start and drops the EC3 elbow as Watson talks about how awesome he is. I mean yeah, but he needs more results. Another EC3 elbow is countered by a superkick for two but a hard clothesline gets the same. A powerbomb is countered into an enziguri but it’s a TKO to drop Breeze again. Not that it matters as Breeze grabs a hurricanrana for the pin at 4:09 (Nothing can stop him, nothing can touch him. Ask your parents).
Rating: D. The lack of time killed this one, as did whatever EC3 did to Stephanie and HHH’s cat. At this point, what else could it possibly be? Everything Watson said about him was true and it’s rather sad that the best they can do with him is the guy who hits on the good looking blondes.
From Raw.
Here’s the Shield for their big farewell speech. Roman Reigns talks about how he’s learned you’re not promised tomorrow so if they rode together for the last time, he has no regrets. As for now though, he hasn’t had a one on one match on Raw in five months so we should correct that. Ambrose has business of his own too, and even if no one knows what it is, we love him anyway. That leaves us with Rollins, who has been chasing the dream for a long time now. The fans give us a SLAY THE BEAST chant, which Reigns turns into BURN IT DOWN.
We see the ending of Drew McIntyre vs. Dean Ambrose from Raw.
Harlem Heat Hall of Fame announcement.
From Smackdown.
Here’s Vince McMahon to talk about offering Kofi Kingston a title shot at Wrestlemania. First though, we look at Kofi’s handicap match at Fastlane in a ruse. Back in the arena, Vince talks about how the fans heard what they wanted to hear because he never said Kofi was getting the shot. Vince says everything is a teachable moment but here’s New Day to interrupt. Big E. isn’t going to learn anything right now because they do everything he tells them to.
They flew halfway around the world to India on Vince’s orders and haven’t ever threatened to leave if they don’t get what they want. Kofi has been here for eleven years and deserves a chance. Vince goes into a rant about how no one deserves anything, including him. Big E. says this is bigger than anything, including Vince’s ego. Vince: “Now there is nothing bigger justifiably than my ego.” Xavier talks about Kofi pinning the WWE Champion multiple times but he’s never gotten a one on one shot.
The WWE Universe demands that Kofi get s chance to compete but Vince isn’t buying it. He wishes Kofi deserved this and while he’s done all kinds of great things in the Royal Rumble and the Elimination Chamber, he’s going to be in the Hall of Fame….as part of New Day instead of on his own merits. Kofi is smart enough to take the glory and have these two younger guys do all the work. Vince wishes Kofi was championship material and earlier today, Daniel Bryan called him a good B+ player.
Kofi finally speaks, saying he doesn’t want a handout. He goes around the world doing what he loves but it’s cost him a lot. Kofi has missed birthdays, weddings and has never even gotten to take his kids trick or treating. He wasn’t there earlier this week when his son lost his first tooth. Through all that, Kofi has never complained, even though Vince has never let someone like him compete for the WWE Title.
What Kofi needs right now is to be told what he needs to do so he can do it. This brings out Orton….and Joe….and the Bar….and Rowan in a gauntlet match next week to get his title match. Everyone comes to the ring and the fight is on with New Day fighting off the villains to end the show. Awesome promos from New Day, who have earned this status over the years but never really used it.
Video on Ronda Rousey/Charlotte/Becky Lynch.
From Smackdown.
Here’s Becky Lynch for a chat, though first she has to throw away the crutch. She limps to the ring and recaps the entire story, which doesn’t make sense when she sums it up. Becky is glad to be here and happy to be in Wrestlemania after Fastlane, even though it took quite a feat. Do you know how hard it is to play mind games on someone with no brain? She got exactly what she wanted from Ronda Rousey though and will pay it back at WrestleMania when she breaks the arm and takes the title.
This brings out Charlotte to say Becky is now in Charlotte’s main event. It’s one thing to be hot for six months but Charlotte has been hot for six years. That’s why she was chosen and she’ll get the job done. Becky was chosen because people felt sorry for her, including Rousey. Becky doesn’t buy it and says she’ll see Charlotte at Wrestlemania.
Lucha House Party vs. Jinder Mahal/Singh Brothers
If we just have to. Sunil starts with a dancing wristlock on Lince, who dropkicks him down without much trouble. Metalik comes in for the abrupt commercial and we come back with Kalisto fighting out of a chinlock. The Singhs’ double suplex is countered into a double DDT and the hot(ish) tag brings Metalik back in. Sumir gets caught grabbing the ropes on a sunset flip so Metalik kicks him in the head, setting up Dorado’s shooting star press for the pin at 7:43.
We recap Batista attacking Ric Flair at his birthday party.
From Raw.
Here’s an angry HHH in street clothes to address Batista. This brings out said Batista, with security guarding him. HHH asks if Batista is getting in the ring or standing there as a nose ring model. Batista laughs and says he learned from HHH and Flair over the years so yeah, they’re here for him. He’s getting what he wants one way or another. HHH talks about Batista quitting over the years and promises to run through the guardians of the independent circuit to get to him.
Batista goes into a rant about how he quit to get away from HHH for holding him down so many times. He wants HHH at Wrestlemania and the match is on. That’s what Batista wanted: one more match to end his career on his terms and one more match to end HHH’s career on his terms. HHH says the match is going to be on his terms because it’s going to be No Holds Barred.
That’s the best idea given the circumstances and certainly fits the story that much better. Batista’s explanation for why he wants to face HHH…..well it’s an explanation. It’s not a particularly good one and it’s something we could piece together ourselves, but I’ll take it over us being left to figure it out or Batista saying his words spoke for themselves. The stipulation should help a lot and it gives me more hope for the match.
Overall Rating: C. They did a MUCH better job of balancing the two shows here and covered most of the big stuff (No mention of Kurt Angle’s retirement though?). This felt like a show designed to make you watch Wrestlemania and that’s exactly what it should have been. Good effort this week and that’s a rather nice thing to be able to say for a change.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Smackdown – March 12, 2019: They Are Still Chanting His Name
IMG Credit: WWE
Smackdown
Date: March 12, 2019
Location: Nutter Center, Dayton, Ohio
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
Now believe it or not, this show is going to mainly be about the McMahons. It’s a Vince and Shane night in this case, with the former being here to address Kofi Kingston and the latter to explain why he attacked the Miz. Maybe that’s why this year’s Wrestlemania build isn’t exactly setting the world on fire. Let’s get to it.
Here are Sunday’s results if you need a recap.
Here’s Shane to open things up and the heel turn seems to have worked. With the Best in the World trophy in the ring, Shane orders the ring announcer to refer to him as the Best in the World, getting angry when it’s not up to his standards. Shane gets right to the point by saying he’s tired of Miz needing him all the time, just like everyone else around here. After pausing for a WE WANT KOFI chant, Shane rants about having to do something for everyone behind the scenes.
That stopped on Sunday when he got to beat Miz up in Miz’s hometown. The reality is that he’s the best in the world because he was born that way, and now he’ll be doing things for himself. Attacking Miz on Sunday so that the last thing he saw was his father’s baked potato face was incredible and that spark isn’t going away. He’s even going to do it again at Wrestlemania, and it’s going to be awesome. This was better than anything Shane has done in a long time and changed absolutely nothing about the fact that probably a dozen people could be better served in this spot.
Aleister Black/Ricochet/Hardys vs. The Bar/Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev
The seeds of the multi team match begin. Black and Nakamura start with a strike off (I was expecting a spirited debate) before it’s off to Matt in the very old school shirt. That means some shouting without much offense so he hands it off to Jeff to get beaten down by Cesaro. Rusev adds the shoulders in the corner and the chinlock goes on until Jeff jawbreaks his way to freedom.
It’s off to Ricochet to speed things up but Rusev knocks him to the floor and we take a break. Back with Ricochet tagging in Matt to clean house. The yelling clothesline in the corner allows another tag to Jeff for the Twisting Stunner. The Swanton hits Cesaro but everyone makes the save as everything breaks down. Cue the New Day to join the fight as the match is thrown out at 9:52.
Rating: C+. I can go for multi team matches like this and the ending sets up whatever big match they have for Wrestlemania (please not another ladder match). Throw in the Usos and you have a six team match already set, though I’m not sure where that leaves the Revival. Anyway, good while it lasted but the ending was what mattered.
Post match New Day beats up all four teams with Kofi hitting Trouble in Paradise on Nakamura.
We cut to the back where the Usos like what they saw. They warn all the teams about what’s coming and welcome them to the Uso Penitentiary. I’d be fine with just them vs. the Hardys, but why have two teams when you can have far too many?
Here’s Randy Orton for a chat. In 2002, AJ Styles was wrestling for $10 in front of 12 people. In 2004, AJ was in a Bingo hall while Orton was winning the World Title. Orton has been a champion every year while AJ doing nothing. This brings out AJ, who says Orton certainly followed AJ pretty closely over the year despite him not mattering that much.
Orton wouldn’t have made it in his world with a lame pose and a knockoff Diamond Cutter. Randy laughs at the idea of an indy guy talking about someone ripping things off and holds up the Too Sweet sign. AJ says look around, because indy guys like that have taken over. Orton lists off his accomplishments but AJ talks about all the groups that Orton has been part of over the years because Orton has needed a lot of babysitters.
Orton has jumped a lot of people over the years and AJ isn’t going to be the next victim. That’s not cool with Orton, because it may be AJ’s house but Orton is the landlord and rent is due. AJ can make the check out to RKO. AJ points at the sign and says come take the rent. The challenge isn’t accepted….but come on now.
Asuka vs. Sonya Deville
Non-title. They go to the mat to start with Sonya not exactly being able to hang with the champ. Back up and Sonya spears the heck out of her but gets a knee to the face. The sliding knee to the face sends Sonya outside and Asuka baseball slides Mandy by mistake. Mandy pulls the ring skirt down and Sonya slips, allowing Asuka to kick her into the Asuka Lock for the tap at 2:39.
Post match Sonya is mad and won’t leave with Mandy.
The Iiconics declare that un-Iconic and want to know where Sasha Banks and Bayley are. They want the next title shot.
Here’s Becky Lynch for a chat, though first she has to throw away the crutch. She limps to the ring and recaps the entire story, which doesn’t make sense when she sums it up. Becky is glad to be here and happy to be in Wrestlemania after Fastlane, even though it took quite a feat. Do you know how hard it is to play mind games on someone with no brain? She got exactly what she wanted from Ronda Rousey though and will pay it back at Wrestlemania when she breaks the arm and takes the title.
This brings out Charlotte to say Becky is now in Charlotte’s main event. It’s one thing to be hot for six months but Charlotte has been hot for six years. That’s why she was chosen and she’ll get the job done. Becky was chosen because people felt sorry for her, including Rousey. Becky doesn’t buy it and says she’ll see Charlotte at Wrestlemania.
Daniel Bryan and Rowan leave Vince’s office but say it was a private discussion. They’re in a tag match later.
Rey Mysterio/R-Truth vs. Samoa Joe/Andrade
Rey goes after Andrade to start but a blind tag brings in Joe for a hard faceplant as we take an early break. Back with Rey hitting the Code Red on Andrade and making the tag to Truth for the John Cena offense. Everything breaks down and Rey hits a double 619 followed by a frog splash to Andrade. The backsplash breaks it up but Rey victory rolls Joe for the pin at 6:13. Not enough shown to rate, but at least they waited one whole title defense to pin Joe.
Post match Joe snaps and beats up Truth and Andrade.
We look at Alexa Bliss being announced as Wrestlemania host.
Kevin Owens/Mustafa Ali vs. Daniel Bryan/Rowan
Bryan and Owens start fast with an elbow taking Daniel down. Owens says it’s his show and it’s off to Rowan for a slightly slower pace. The slugout goes to Owens so he can bring in Ali to face Bryan. A snap DDT plants Ali and we take a break. Back with Rowan driving Ali ribs first into the turnbuckle, setting up Bryan’s butterfly superplex.
The LeBell Lock sends Ali to the ropes, but Bryan has until five. Ali hits a dropkick for a breather and a Backstabber gets two, despite Owens telling him to come tag. Owens comes in anyway and a double superkick puts Rowan on the floor. Rowan sends Owens into the barricade and comes in off a blind tag, allowing him to claw slam Ali for the pin at 9:20.
Rating: C+. There’s a good chance that Ali not tagging could lead somewhere between himself and Owens, which isn’t the worst idea in the world. Ali sticking around the higher parts of the card is interesting though at some point he needs to win something else to validate being this high up.
Here’s Vince McMahon to talk about offering Kofi Kingston a title shot at Wrestlemania. First though, we look at Kofi’s handicap match at Fastlane in a ruse. Back in the arena, Vince talks about how the fans heard what they wanted to hear because he never said Kofi was getting the shot. Vince says everything is a teachable moment but here’s New Day to interrupt. Big E. isn’t going to learn anything right now because they do everything he tells them to.
They flew halfway around the world to India on Vince’s orders and haven’t ever threatened to leave if they don’t get what they want. Kofi has been here for eleven years and deserves a chance. Vince goes into a rant about how no one deserves anything, including him. Big E. says this is bigger than anything, including Vince’s ego. Vince: “Now there is nothing bigger justifiably than my ego.” Xavier talks about Kofi pinning the WWE Champion multiple times but he’s never gotten a one on one shot.
The WWE Universe demands that Kofi get s chance to compete but Vince isn’t buying it. He wishes Kofi deserved this and while he’s done all kinds of great things in the Royal Rumble and the Elimination Chamber, he’s going to be in the Hall of Fame….as part of New Day instead of on his own merits. Kofi is smart enough to take the glory and have these two younger guys do all the work. Vince wishes Kofi was championship material and earlier today, Daniel Bryan called him a good B+ player.
Kofi finally speaks, saying he doesn’t want a handout. He goes around the world doing what he loves but it’s cost him a lot. Kofi has missed birthdays, weddings and has never even gotten to take his kids trick or treating. He wasn’t there earlier this week when his son lost his first tooth. Through all that, Kofi has never complained, even though Vince has never let someone like him compete for the WWE Title.
What Kofi needs right now is to be told what he needs to do so he can do it. This brings out Orton….and Joe….and the Bar….and Rowan in a gauntlet match next week to get his title match. Everyone comes to the ring and the fight is on with New Day fighting off the villains to end the show. Awesome promos from New Day, who have earned this status over the years but never really used it.
Overall Rating: B. The promo at the end helps carry this but the best thing about the show, as always, is how it feels focused. There’s nothing on here where I wonder why they’re doing this or where I feel like it’s a waste of time. You can see a lot of the matches being built for Wrestlemania, though I’m not wild on some of the directions they’re taking. At least the card is taking shape, even if it’s one with a lot of people being packed onto a show when they shouldn’t be. Rather good show tonight, with the stories carrying things.
Results
Aleister Black/Ricochet/Hardys vs. The Bar/Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev went to a no contest when New Day interfered
Asuka b. Sonya Deville – Asuka Lock
Rey Mysterio/R-Truth b. Samoa Joe/Andrade – Victory roll to Joe
Daniel Bryan/Rowan b. Mustafa Ali/Kevin Owens – Claw slam to Ali
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Fastlane 2019: One Night Only
IMG Credit: WWE
Fastlane 2019
Date: March 10, 2019
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, Renee Young, Corey Graves
I’m not sure what to think of with this show as there’s only so much that can be done with a show that clearly serves as nothing more than a last stop on the way to Wrestlemania. There are some matches tonight that could go somewhere but a lot of what we’ll be seeing is going to be a stepping stone towards next month. Let’s get to it.
Kickoff Show: New Day vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev
Lana is in Nakamura/Rusev’s corner and has her hair cut to its NXT length. It’s Big E./Xavier Woods for New Day here with Woods and Nakamura starting things off. Some whips into the corner don’t work for Nakamura as Woods snaps off a headscissors for an early two. A kick to the head drops Woods though and we take an early break.
Back with Rusev driving shoulders into Woods’ ribs in the corner and slapping on a bearhug. Nakamura comes back in for a front facelock as we go split screen to show Miz talking to his dad about bringing the titles home tonight. Shane McMahon comes in to say the same and the former champs are ready. Back to full screen with Woods getting away and making the hot tag to Big E. for some short form house cleaning. Nakamura’s guillotine choke slows things down but Big E. suplexes him away without much effort.
Nakamura snaps the throat across the ropes and gets two off a middle rope knee to the chest. Woods comes back in and gets kicked in the head, setting up a DDT to give Rusev two. A wheelbarrow suplex gets two and the sliding knee from Nakamura connects for the same. Woods rolls over for the tag to Big E. but Lana crotches Woods to break up UpUpDownDown.
The Machka Kick gets two on Big E. as Woods makes a diving save. Woods’ running flip dive onto both villains is countered into a double powerbomb for two back inside and Rusev is stunned. The Accolade goes on but Big E. going after Nakamura is enough for the break. It’s back t Big E. and now UpUpDownDown can connect for the pin at 13:18.
Rating: B. This was a downright good match that got more time than I was expecting to see. They had the chemistry rolling with Big E. and Woods, the weaker of the New Day combinations, more than hanging with two solid midcard stars. I’m not wild on Rusev taking the pin, but it’s the logical result here.
The Rey Mysterio vs. Andrade match has been removed from the Kickoff Show and added to the main show as part of a four way for the US Title, also involving Samoa Joe and R-Truth.
The opening video looks at everyone trying to get to Wrestlemania. That would be a more effective theme is the show wasn’t likely to have fifteen matches with more than half of them being multi-person matches.
Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Shane McMahon/The Miz
Shane and Miz are challenging after losing the titles last month with Miz’s dad in the front row. Shane kicks at Jimmy to start as Jey talks about Shane’s shoes. Jimmy gets knocked down into the corner and Miz comes in for some double stomps. A Hart Attack gets two on Jimmy as Graves keeps ripping on Miz’s dad. Jey comes in and Shane walks into a clothesline to put the champs in control.
The chinlock goes on for a good while until Shane fights up with a tornado DDT. That’s enough for the hot tag off to Miz, who cleans house to take over. Miz sends the Usos outside for a big dive off the top (you don’t see that very often) which gets some applause from Miz’s dad. Back in and Jimmy gets two off a Samoan drop with Shane making the save.
Shane gets knocked down and it’s the Skull Crushing Finale to Jey but the referee is checking on Shane, meaning it’s only a near fall. Jey sends Miz into the post but the Usos spend too much time yelling at Miz’s dad, allowing Miz to get two off a rollup. With Jimmy down in the corner, Shane goes up so Jey gets up on the other corner. Jey goes to dive at Miz but Shane dropkicks him out of the air for a good looking crash. Miz goes up for a splash which hits knees, allowing Jimmy to roll him up for the pin to retain at 14:09.
Rating: B-. It was an entertaining match with Miz trying harder than usual but there’s only so much you can do to get around the fact that this is designed to set up Miz vs. Shane at Wrestlemania. There are so many other teams who could have been used in this spot but for some reason we’re stuck watching these two do their thing about Miz and his dad. I’m not sure who is supposed to care about this story, but I don’t think too many people are.
Post match Miz and Shane shake hands and go over to Miz’s dad. Everything seems ok until Shane jumps Miz, because we’re getting face Miz vs. heel Shane at Wrestlemania. Shane even shoves Miz’s dad and uses his well known MMA skills for a triangle choke on Miz. The hold is finally let go and Miz’s dad comes over the barricade to check on him. I’m so glad we’re giving Shane McMahon this story instead of all the people sitting on the sidelines. You have people leaving because they can’t get a spot, and Shane is getting featured in the first half hour of a pay per view.
Bobby Lashley, Baron Corbin and Drew McIntyre are ready to break the Shield again.
Here’s Elias for a song. He makes fun of Miz, mocks Cleveland and mentions Lebron James….and that’s it.
Smackdown Women’s Title: Mandy Rose vs. Asuka
Asuka is defending after Mandy (with Sonya Deville in her corner) pinned her in a non-title match a few weeks back. Mandy grabs a headlock to start but gets caught in an ankle lock. That’s enough to bring Sonya up to the apron, allowing Mandy to knee Asuka in the face for a closer two than it should have been. The abdominal stretch goes on with Graves praising Mandy even more than usual, sending Phillips into obvious fits of laughter on commentary.
The hold is reversed into an Octopus Hold as Sonya randomly looks underneath the ring. Asuka goes with the strikes into a release German suplex for two. A sliding knee gets two more but the running hip attack misses, allowing Mandy to score with another jumping knee. Asuka knees her even harder so Sonya goes underneath the ring for a kendo stick. Mandy trips over the raised ring skirt though and Asuka scores with a kick to the head to retain at 6:38.
Rating: C. Mandy has gotten way better in a hurry and that’s a good sign for her future. Just looking at her, you would expect her to be nothing but eye candy, but she’s actually turned into someone worthwhile who can have a good match with a lot of people. This was WAY better than it had any right to be, though the ending was a big head scratch inducing.
Post match Mandy doesn’t want to hear from Sonya.
Earlier tonight, Kofi Kingston was told to go see the McMahons about the Smackdown World Title match. He’s still waiting outside when the rest of New Day comes up to say they need to go in now. Woods and Big E. give Vince a great speech about how Kofi has been waiting for eleven years and now it needs to be a triple threat. Vince makes it a triple threat with Kofi in the title match RIGHT NOW with New Day barred from ringside.
Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Kevin Owens
Bryan is defending. Actually hang on a second as Kofi has his entrance, but we’re told the match is taking place later tonight. Instead we get this.
Kofi Kingston vs. The Bar
The Bar doesn’t have to tag so the double teaming is on in a hurry. Kofi tries to fight back but is quickly taken down for a double leg crank. The beating heads to the floor but this time Kofi actually knocks Sheamus down on the apron. Cesaro catches him inside though and the powerbomb/top rope clothesline combination destroys Kofi again. The fans declare this boring as the Brogue Kick gets two with Cesaro pulling Kofi up. Cue New Day for the save but Rusev/Nakamura cut them off. The super White Noise finishes Kofi with feet on the chest at 5:08.
Rating: D. Pure angle advancement and that’s fine. There’s only so much you can get out of something like this and you can’t blame the wrestlers for not having a good match here. Kofi’s push towards the title like this feels a bit rushed though and it wouldn’t surprise me to see him lose again to set up the (hopeful) title change at Wrestlemania.
Sasha Banks and Bayley are ready to defend the titles against anyone and they’re ready for Nia Jax and Tamina tonight.
Elias sings again, this time about how Kofi and Miz looked like Cleveland Cavaliers.
We recap Shane turning on Miz. It was less than 45 minutes ago!
Shane has nothing to say.
Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Aleister Black/Ricochet vs. Chad Gable/Bobby Roode
The Revival is defending so the challengers send them outside in all of two seconds. Roode and Gable join them on the floor, leaving Ricochet and Black to moonsault into their poses. We settle down to Gable waistlocking Ricochet down but getting thrown off for a break. Wilder tags himself in and it’s quickly off to Dawson for an assisted suplex. Gable tags himself in as well and gets two off his own suplex. The armbar doesn’t last long as Dawson comes in and drops Ricochet ribs first across the top rope.
Some elbows get two but Ricochet rolls forward for a dropkick to Dawson. That’s enough for a double tag to bring in Black and Roode with Aleister cleaning house. It’s too early for Black Mass as Roode sends the kick into Dawson and spinebusters Black for two. Everything breaks down and Gable German suplexes Dawson with Wilder coming off the top with a splash for the save.
Ricochet’s shooting star gets two with Roode making a save of his own. Everyone heads outside with Ricochet and Dawson being left on top. Ricochet hurricanranas him down, landing head first on the apron in the process. Thankfully he’s not dead and hits a running flip dive over the top onto Roode, with Gable tagging himself in as Ricochet is flying through the air (legal, believe it or not). It’s a bad idea though as the Shatter Machine finishes Gable to retain the titles at 10:47.
Rating: B. This was good stuff with another obvious winner, which will lead to Revival losing the non-title matches for weeks. It’s smart to have Roode/Gable take the fall (as they could have for weeks instead of Revival) as Black and Ricochet are still new and shouldn’t be getting pinned yet. It’s the best match of the night so far, though I’m not sure how strong of a compliment that is.
Post match the Revival goes after Black and Ricochet, earning a 630.
US Title: Samoa Joe vs. R-Truth vs. Andrade vs. Rey Mysterio
Bonus match with Joe defending. All three challengers go to the floor so Joe is right there with a suicide elbow to all three of them. Back inside and Joe headbutts Andrade down in the corner but Truth is back up to take over. Rey comes in to send Andrade and Truth down but Joe runs Rey over. A heck of a tornado DDT gives Rey two on Joe so Andrade takes Rey up top.
Truth makes a save and it’s a super hurricanrana to Andrade to give Truth two with Rey breaking it up with a slingshot legdrop. Rey dives at Joe and gets caught, only to have Andrade missile dropkick both of them. Andrade isn’t done as he hits two of Three Amigos, with Rey reversing the third into a small package for two. With Andrade on the floor, Rey hits a hurricanrana off the apron, leaving Zelina Vega to kick Truth in the head.
That means a fight with Carmella, so Joe Rock Bottoms Rey for two. Truth fights back and hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle on Joe but the ax kick misses. That means a whip into the post to get rid of Truth but Rey is there with the 619. Dropping the Dime misses though and Joe chokes Rey out to retain at 10:51.
Rating: B-. It’s not as good as their match on Smackdown but what we got here was good while it lasted. I was worried they would switch the title already so it’s a relief that Joe got to retain. It’s a positive sign that he might actually keep the title and stick around as champion for more than a few weeks.
Women’s Tag Team Titles: Boss N Hug Connection vs. Tamina/Nia Jax
Beth Phoenix is on commentary. Bayley/Sasha Banks are defending and Graves is suggesting a split in the near future. Banks kicks Nia in the face to start and it’s off to Bayley so Nia throws Banks at her for a good visual. Tamina comes in to take over and the Samoans take turns beating on her in the corner.
A mini hot shot gets rid of Tamina though and it’s back to Banks to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down with Banks trying a suicide dive but getting pulled out of the air. Bayley dives onto the three of them before throwing Nia back in for a Meteora. The top rope elbow gets two with Tamina making the save, leaving Bayley to hurricanrana Nia for the pin to retain at 7:00.
Rating: D+. Well, they tried, and by they I mean Banks and Bayley. Nia and Tamina were as useless as ever here as big dragons who could barely move, as tends to be the case almost every time they’re out there. What in the world are you supposed to do with two monsters who can barely move? The champs need something better than this, but you can almost guarantee that Nia and Tamina will get another chance because they always do.
Post match the beatdown is on again until Beth gets up from commentary. Nia and Tamina beat her down until Natalya makes the save. The Samoans beat her down as well and stand tall. This is an exact summary of what is wrong with Nia: she’s a monster who loses a lot and then is right back the next week/night/two minutes later being a monster again. She lost a match FIVE MINUTES AGO and now we’re supposed to buy her as a monster. Graves asked “who is going to stop them”. Uh, BAYLEY AND SASHA PERHAPS???
This is what I mean when I say Nia needs to go away for a long time, but WWE insists on her being there. Oh and great: Natalya/Beth vs. Tamina/Nia is going to be on Wrestlemania now. A match that no one was asking for but we’re getting it anyway because that show isn’t going to be long enough already.
We recap Daniel Bryan vs. Kevin Owens. Kofi was originally supposed to get the shot but Vince got all evil and replaced him with Owens. Kevin has beaten Bryan in a tag match with a Stunner, though he feels like a filler challenger until Kofi gets the real shot.
Smackdown World Title: Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan
Bryan is defending….and this is still going to be a triple threat match.
Smackdown World Title: Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Mustafa Ali
Bryan, with Rowan in his corner, is defending and the fans are immediately there with the WE WANT KOFI chants. The bell rings and Bryan yells at the two of them, earning himself a double beatdown. Owens: “Save the planet somewhere else you idiot!” With Bryan down on the floor it’s Owens running Ali over with a shoulder. Bryan gets back in and starts with the kicks as the KOFI chants get even louder.
They all head outside with Owens Cannonballing them both against the barricade for two on Bryan. Ali comes back in and goes up top, where Bryan dropkicks him down into the barricade for a heck of a bump. That leaves Owens to take the kicks in the corner and it’s off to an armbar, drawing more KOFI chants. Bryan moonsaults over Owens out of the corner and hits the running clothesline but stops to kick Ali back outside.
The YES Kicks have Owens in more trouble as Ali comes back in for the rolling X Factor. Bryan runs him over again but Owens is up with the superkicks. Ali jumps on Owens’ back, only to be dropped down onto Bryan for a huge crash. It’s Bryan heading up top but having his Doomsday Device broken up and a super Spanish Fly plants him. Ali reverse hurricanranas Owens into position for the 054, which only hits mat. The Stunner gives Owens two on Ali and a Pop Up Powerbomb gets the same on Bryan.
Another powerbomb onto the apron is countered into a backdrop but Bryan’s running knee hit the post. Ali hits a 450 onto Bryan on the apron with Rowan making the save at two. Owens and Ali superkick the monster down but Ali’s dive is caught. Owens adds a big running flip dive but Bryan is right there with the running knee from the apron. Another running knee misses Bryan and Ali is right back with a middle rope tornado DDT to the floor.
Owens is back up to drop Ali again but Rowan sends Bryan inside and Owens through the timekeeper’s area. Back in and Bryan gets two as the fans get another chance to chant for Kofi. Bryan slaps Ali in the face while shouting YOU DON’T DESERVE TO BE HERE so Ali slaps back and goes up, only to dive into a knee to the face to retain Bryan’s title at 18:39.
Rating: B+. Distracting chants aside, this was a strong three way with the right winner (of the available options). The problem right now is WWE running basically the same story with Becky and Kofi and they’re risking the fans just not caring after being teased so many times. It works well enough if the title changes happen at Wrestlemania, but all these changes for the sake of changes and things happening during the shows are getting old.
Post match Rowan claw slams Ali.
We recap Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch. Becky was supposed to go to Wrestlemania but Vince said no and put Charlotte in the match instead. Then Stephanie decided to let Becky have another chance so if she wins tonight, she goes to Wrestlemania in a triple threat for the Raw Women’s Title.
Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte
Becky limps to the ring on a crutch and also has a bad arm and bad ribs. She throws the crutch away and we’re ready to go with Charlotte easily taking things into the corner. Becky fights out of the corner with one right hand, only to have Charlotte say you’ll have to do more than that. A half crab wrecks the knee even more and Charlotte chop blocks the leg down.
Becky tries to fight back with a shot to the face but gets taken down with another chop block. Charlotte stays cocky and heads up top until Becky shoves her off and into the barricade for the big crash. Back in and the Becky gets the Disarm-Her, which is reversed into a Figure Eight….and here’s Ronda Rousey to hit Becky for the DQ to make it a triple threat at Wrestlemania at 8:43.
Rating: D. So the top face in the whole thing is beaten down again while the fresh heel runs in and attacks said face, thereby giving the fans what they want, while making sure Becky looks like a loser in the process. I’m sure we’ll hear from Stephanie about the whole thing though because this story is somehow her and her family. This is another match that could have been on Raw and no one would have noticed much of a difference.
Elias sings some more about how awful Cleveland is and says he’s done for the night. Lacey Evans comes out for her cameo and leaves as always. Randy Orton comes in with an RKO to Elias but walks into the Phenomenal Forearm from AJ Styles.
We recap the Shield vs. Baron Corbin/Bobby Lashley/Drew McIntyre. The Shield is back due to Roman Reigns being in remission. The other three are here because Shield needs targets.
Shield vs. Baron Corbin/Bobby Lashley/Drew McIntyre
Cole hypes up the idea of this being the last time for the Shield because Ambrose isn’t re-signing. The fight is on before the bell and the Shield clears the ring without much effort. Lashley takes Rollins into the corner to start and hands it off to Corbin, who gets taken into the middle buckle with a Downward Spiral. Ambrose comes in and fights McIntyre for a few moments before handing it back to Reigns, who doesn’t get much of a reaction.
McIntyre forearms him a few times before it’s quickly back to Rollins for a wishbone stretch. Corbin comes back in and takes over on Rollins, including the required chinlock. Seth fights up but gets cut off by McIntyre. That means a kick to the face and it’s back to Ambrose to take over. Dean sends McIntyre outside for a top rope elbow to the head but Lashley hits the spear. Ambrose barely beats the count back inside so Lashley plants him with a Downward Spiral for two.
Corbin chokeslams Reigns as the other four fight into the crowd by the Kickoff Show set. Reigns gets two off a sitout powerbomb as Rollins dives off a balcony to dive onto the other three. We get some miscommunication with Corbin trying his slide underneath the ropes and running through Reigns’ boot to the face like it didn’t make contact. A Superman Punch gets two as everyone is back to ringside.
End of Days hits Reigns with Rollins and Ambrose diving in for the save. Reigns almost gets TripleBombed through the announcers’ table but another save is made. A Stomp knocks Lashley silly and Reigns spears Corbin. There’s the TripleBomb to put McIntyre through the table and Corbin is left alone in the ring. One more TripleBomb finishes Corbin at 24:52.
Rating: B-. It was good, but egads the IT’S THE LAST TIME got obnoxious by the end. There was almost no doubt about how this was going and I don’t know how many people believe that it’s the last time for the team. At least Corbin took the fall instead of either of the other two, though it’s not like they had any chance between them. As usual, the Shield reunions weren’t great but that’s become the standard anymore.
Shield poses to end the show.
Overall Rating: B-. Yeah the show was watchable and even good at times, but I don’t remember a more annoying pay per view in a long time. The show is just now over and I don’t think I can remember one single thing here that felt like it mattered. There was good action, but nothing we haven’t seen done better before (in one case, earlier this week). WWE made it very clear that this show didn’t matter and that’s what we got here: a show that didn’t change anything and if you skipped it, you wouldn’t miss anything. I feel like I wasted my time tonight and that’s one of the worst feelings you can have coming out of a show.
Results
Usos b. Miz/Shane McMahon – Small package to Miz
Asuka b. Mandy Rose – Kick to the head
The Bar b. Kofi Kingston – Super White Noise
Revival b. Aleister Black/Ricochet and Bobby Roode/Chad Gable – Shatter Machine to Gable
Samoa Joe b. R-Truth, Andrade and Rey Mysterio – Koquina Clutch to Mysterio
Sasha Banks/Bayley b. Tamina/Nia Jax – Hurricanrana to Jax
Daniel Bryan b. Mustafa Ali and Kevin Owens – Knee to Ali
Becky Lynch b. Charlotte via DQ when Ronda Rousey interfered
Shield b. Baron Corbin/Drew McIntyre/Bobby Lashley – TripleBomb to Corbin
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at: