ECW On Sci Fi – April 1, 2008: They Needed This

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: April 1, 2008
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re done with Wrestlemania and thankfully that means we have a new ECW Champion. Kane won the pre-show battle royal and then beat Chavo Guerrero in about ten seconds to win the title. That alone makes the show feel more important, but now we get to see where they go from here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Kane winning the battle royal and the title at Wrestlemania.

Here is Kane to recap winning the battle royal and the title at Wrestlemania. Kane says we haven’t seen anything yet, so here is CM Punk, with Money in the Bank briefcase, to interrupt. That earns him a threat from Kane, but Punk says he’s out here to say he’s a bit jealous. Punk explains the idea of Money in the Bank but here is Chavo Guerrero to interrupt. He’s getting the title match next because Kane’s title win was a fluke! Kane: “I beat you in eight seconds!”

Punk talks about how that has to be some kind of a record but Chavo laughs him off. Chavo promises to win the title back next time. For tonight though, it’s tag match time, with Chavo and Shelton Benjamin vs. Kane/Punk. Cue Shelton to say the only reason Punk is standing there is he got double teamed on Sunday. Punk calls Benjamin Goldilocks and says the one thing Benjamin can’t call himself is Mr. Money In The Bank. This was quite the wordy exchange.

Mike Knox vs. Stevie Richards

Knox takes him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs to start but Richards manages a trip to the floor. Richards’ dive off the apron is elbowed out of the air, followed by the bearhug back inside. A belly to back suplex cuts off Stevie’s comeback attempt but Stevie kicks his way out of trouble. Knox shrugs it off though and grabs a backbreaker, followed by the spinning Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C-. Pretty nothing match here as Knox is about as generic of a heel as you can get and Richards has been beaten into the ground. There isn’t much else that can be said about these two feuding, but for some reason they have been going back and forth for a few weeks now. Hopefully it wraps up soon, though neither is exactly interesting at the moment.

Video on the Hall of Fame induction ceremony.

Tazz is in the ring with Colin Delaney, who says he didn’t get hurt at Wrestlemania. Next year though, he wants to be at Wrestlemania as part of the roster. Cue Armando Estrada to offer Delaney a contract….or not as it’s an April Fools joke. Delaney can have a contract, and all he has to do is win this match.

Colin Delaney vs. Big Show

Cobra clutch finishes Delaney in about 45 seconds. The spin when Show sent Delaney flying to let go of the hold was the best part.

We take a long look at Ric Flair retiring at Wrestlemania and the still outstanding farewell from Raw.

Chavo Guerrero/Shelton Benjamin vs. CM Punk/Kane

Punk cranks on Benjamin’s arm to start before handing it off to Kane. The basement dropkick gets two on Benjamin but it’s off to Chavo to kick at the leg. Kane scares Chavo over to Benjamin, who comes back in, only to be launched over the top. We take a break and come back with Kane and Punk taking turns kicking away at Benjamin in the corner.

Chavo comes back in and hits a quick jawbreaker but needs Benjamin to save him from the GTS. We hit the neck crank from Benjamin, followed by the double arm crank from Chavo. Punk finally fights out of the corner and bulldogs his way to freedom. Kane comes back in to start cleaning house, including a big boot to Benjamin. Chavo crotches Kane on top, only to have Punk hit the GTS on Benjamin for the pin.

Rating: C+. This got some time and felt far bigger than anything else on the show, despite not being that important of a match all things considered. Punk is pretty clearly on his way out of ECW, Chavo was destroyed at Wrestlemania and Benjamin is Benjamin. That leaves Kane, the already established monster, as the big deal for ECW and that doesn’t leave much reason to believe Chavo and Benjamin had a chance over fifteen minutes.

Overall Rating: C. The show still isn’t very good and feels miles beneath the two main WWE shows, but just having Kane as the top star, or at least champion, gives it more of a legitimacy. No one was buying Chavo as champion of anything but Kane could be a midcard champion on Raw or Smackdown without a bit of doubt. The rest of the show was nothing, but I can give them a break as everyone is still exhaling after Wrestlemania. If things stay like this next week then there’s a problem, but for a one off, it was ok enough.

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ECW On Sci Fi – March 25, 2008: End This Already

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 25, 2008
Location: Crown Coliseum, Fayetteville, North Carolina
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s the final ECW before Wrestlemania and that means pretty much nothing around here. There is no title match set for Wrestlemania as it is going to be all about the battle royal. I’m not sure what that is going to leave us to do on this show but maybe they have one more week of nothing before things, at least hopefully, reset next week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes/Kofi Kingston/Kane/Tommy Dreamer/Jesse & Festus/Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore/Jim Duggan/Val Venis/Jamie Noble vs. Great Khali/Miz/Chuck Palumbo/Matt Striker/Mark Henry/Snitsky/Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch/Brian Kendrick/Deuce N Domino/Elijah Burke

Because THIS is a good idea. This is all twenty four entrants into the battle royal thrown into a tag match, which makes me wonder how many people the aprons can hold. Cody rolls Kendrick up for a fast two and then backslides him for the same. It’s quickly off to Noble vs. Palumbo, with the latter grabbing a belly to back suplex.

Yang comes in off some of that Jung Dragons chemistry but gets suplexed for his efforts. A middle rope hurricanrana gets Yang out of trouble and it’s time for a parade of dives. We take a break and come back with everything breaking down, as you might have expected. Kofi dives onto Deuce N Domino and Holly gets to hit an Alabama Slam. Khali and Kane have finally had enough of this and start wrecking people. With the two of them down, Henry feeds Dreamer into a big boot from Snitsky for the pin.

Rating: C. This is one of those matches that isn’t about the action itself but rather telling you what you might be seeing on Sunday. In that sense it worked out well enough, but my goodness the battle royal might as well have about three people. Chavo almost has to lose at this point as there is just nothing to his title reign and someone else can take the title to hopefully do something with it.

Post match everyone gets in the ring for the huge staredown.

Boxing personalities talk about Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Chavo Guerrero comes up to mock the injured Tommy Dreamer. A match is set for tonight, thanks to some insults to Colin Delaney (sure why not).

Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito

Feeling out process to start with Carlito slugging away as Taz says he has been hit in the face with a ladder in a match but never had a ladder match. Benjamin skins the cat but Carlito snaps his throat across the top for a crash to the floor. We hit the chinlock back inside and the fans do not seem impressed. Benjamin fights up but gets knocked back into the corner as this isn’t exactly burning up the mat.

Another chinlock goes on but this time Benjamin electric chairs his way to freedom. Carlito is back with a neckbreaker for two and we hit the chinlock with a knee in Benjamin’s back. Benjamin finally makes the comeback and hits the overhead belly to belly. A neckbreaker gives Carlito two more but the Backstabber is countered into a buckle bomb. Paydirt is countered into a backbreaker to give Carlito two more but Benjamin catches him on top. A super Paydirt finishes Carlito off.

Rating: C-. These two were left out there to fill in as much time as they could and it didn’t exactly work. There were far too many chinlocks to get them through the match until Benjamin finally won in the end. This really didn’t work very well, but like everything else around here, none of that is going to matter by next week.

Video on the Raw World Title triple threat match.

Wrestlemania rundown.

The final inductee into the Hall of Fame Class: Gordon Solie.

Kelly Kelly/Stevie Richards vs. Mike Knox/Layla

The women actually wrestle to start with Kelly getting two. Knox gets in a cheap shot from the apron though and Layla takes over for a bit. The men come in and Richards swings away until the women getting in a fight distracts him. Knox grabs a swinging Downward Spiral for the fast pin.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and the battle royal participants are at ringside. Dreamer backdrops him to the apron and punches him out to the floor to start, with the unofficial lumberjacks sending Chavo back inside. Chavo sends him shoulder first into the post and we hit the front facelock. The fans think Chavo sucks, even as Dreamer fights up with a bulldog. Guerrero blocks something out of the corner so Dreamer settles for a neckbreaker. Dreamer gets crotched on top though and the frog splash gives Chavo the pin.

Rating: C-. And that’s another Chavo match these days, as they are still rather uninteresting with little going on that could make me care about the title. Dreamer making his comeback is always decent enough but there was only so much that can be done with a three minute match less than a week before Wrestlemania. Just get the title off of Chavo already because this reign is dragging down everything else.

Post match everyone gets inside and the fight is on to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. My goodness Wrestlemania needs to come and go already because this show is falling apart in a hurry. There is only so much that can be done when you have one important story and that one is in limbo due to the champion not having an opponent. Other than that, it is a bunch of people trying to fill in time and that is not going to work long, or even short, term.

 

 

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Smackdown – March 21, 2008: GET ON WITH IT!

Smackdown
Date: March 21, 2008
Location: Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re almost to Wrestlemania and I’m not sure what else there is to build around here. Last week’s main event was a weird combination of a Raw and Smackdown match which felt like a weird off ramp match. Odd are the focus will still be on Edge vs. Undertaker, which really doesn’t need it at this point. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recreation of Batista vs. Umaga in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008. Well that’s a change of pace.

Batista vs. Deuce N Domino

No Cherry this week as she is in the competition later tonight. Batista doesn’t look amused as he drives Deuce into the corner to start. A double team manages to take Batista down but he’s right back with an elbow to Domino’s face. Batista isn’t having that though and sends Deuce outside, setting up the Batista Bomb to finish Domino in a hurry.

Maryse comes up to see Cherry and can’t believe she’s still in the Divas competition. Look at the two of them: Maryse is a Diva but Cherry is a dog.

It’s time for the Divas Competition with Michelle McCool, Eve Torres, Cherry and Victoria left. This week’s competition is an arm wrestling contest so Victoria cheats to beat Eve, Michelle beats Cherry and Michelle beats Victoria. With that out of the way, Victoria is eliminated after last week’s fan vote. Instead of leaving, she gets in a fight with Michelle but gets sent outside.

Video on Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Michael Buffer and Evander Holyfield talk about Mayweather Jr. vs. Big Show.

Big Show vs. Chase Stevens/Andy Douglas/Luke Hawx

Stevens and Douglas were the Naturals in TNA a few years earlier. Before the match, we see Chris Jericho talking about how Show’s right hand is going to make it Wrestlemania RIP for Mayweather. Destruction ensues and the big right hand finishes Stevens in less than a minute and a half.

Raven Symone will be bringing kids to Wrestlemania for Make-A-Wish. Cool.

Edge vs. Funaki

Non-title and the Edgeheads are here with Edge. Funaki seems to be taking this a bit more seriously than Edge, who knocks Funaki down fast. The stomping in the corner keeps Funaki in trouble until he manages an enziguri. Edge hits the spear but pulls Funaki up at two. Instead it’s a Tombstone and arm cross pin (with tongue) to finish for Edge.

Rating: D+. This was just a quick workout for Edge but the Tombstone was a nice touch. Edge knows how to get under people’s skin like no other and mocking Undertaker is the kind of mind game that he would play. Funaki is fine for something like this and they didn’t mess around by letting him get a near fall or anything unnecessary like that. Nothing match, fine use of time.

Post match Edge says he’ll win at Wrestlemania and promises to show us something by the end of the night.

It’s time for MVP’s VIP Lounge with MVP pointing to the Money in the Bank briefcase above the ring. Therefore, his guest this week is Chris Jericho, but first MVP wants to talk about the ladder underneath the briefcase. MVP brags about his career successes and how he has beaten so many World Champions. That means he is the next World Champion because he is better than everyone else in the match. Cue Jericho to interrupt and the fans certainly seem to approve.

Jericho is excited about being back on Smackdown for the first time in five and a half years, but he can’t stand a loudmouthed blowhard who can’t shut up with his own talk show. MVP mocks Jericho and Jericho is right back, pointing out that MVP could have had far worse initials (and yes, he has graphics spelling out some stupid names). That’s too far for MVP, who goes on a rant about how Jericho couldn’t save anyone from anything. He climbs the ladder and gets the briefcase….so Jericho turns said ladder over.

Kane vs. Chuck Palumbo

They fight over the power to start with Palumbo actually taking over off an armbar. Kane fights up and hits the big boot as they head outside. They head back in, where Kane clotheslines him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Kane charging into an elbow in the corner…and here is Great Khali to go after Kane for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Thankfully they didn’t bother trying to make Palumbo a thing here as he stopped showing much potential a good while ago. Kane winning the battle royal and the ECW Title as a result would make good sense and there is a real chance that is where they are heading. Not much of a match, but what were you expecting with Palumbo in there?

Post match Khali beats both of them down but here is Mark Henry to interrupt. Henry World’s Strongest Slams Khali and stands tall.

Eddie Graham Hall of Fame video.

Tag Team Titles: Jesse & Festus vs. Miz/John Morrison

Miz/Morrison are defending. The bell makes Festus snap and he hits Morrison in the face to start fast. An interfering Miz is knocked out of the air and some headbutts to Morrison’s back set up Jesse’s running neckbreaker. Miz gets in a cheap shot though and works on Jesse’s arm before choking on the rope.

Morrison’s chinlock is broken up as Jesse sends him into the corner, where Festus scares Morrison in a funny bit. Miz grabs another chinlock before Jesse neckbreakers his way out of Morrison’s….something. It’s back to Festus for the house cleaning before handing it off to Jesse again. That lets Morrison send Festus outside and the Reality Check retains the titles.

Rating: C-. We’re now to the point where Miz and Morrison have cleaned out the division, which granted doesn’t take that long when there are about four teams. Jesse & Festus need to either win the titles or find something else to do, as the novelty is kind of wearing off. This was mainly a chinlock match with Festus coming in to do his thing and then Jesse gets pinned. That’s only going to get you so far and we have reached that point.

Raw Rebound.

Undertaker vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and Edge/the Edgeheads are here with Chavo. Undertaker starts fast and knocks Chavo down without much trouble. Old School connects and Chavo is rocked early on. A distraction from the floor lets Chavo hammer away in the corner, only to have Undertaker LAUNCH him into said corner as well.

The side slam gives Undertaker two but another distraction sends him outside. This time Chavo manages a baseball slide from behind and the likely not very effective beating begins. Chavo grabs a short armscissors but Undertaker powers out in short order. Snake Eyes into the big boot set up a chokeslam and the Hell’s Gate to finish Chavo.

Rating: C. Chavo has to lose the title at Wrestlemania now as his big win in recent weeks has been over Colin Delaney. Other than giving him a win to make him into something a little bigger, his title reign has been pretty much nothing and that was on display here. Undertaker beating Chavo isn’t a bad thing, but the champ just lost in about five minutes in little more than a squash.

Post match Edge and the Edgeheads come in, each with a chair, and the huge beatdown ensues. The Conchairto leaves Undertaker laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. It’s not a good sign when the best match on the show is Undertaker squashing Chavo Guerrero. The problem is the same as it has been for weeks now: Wrestlemania is set and all that Smackdown can do is fill in time on the way to Orlando. This show was just a bunch of filler with some build towards Wrestlemania, plus the bigger moment at the end. That’s a rough two hours, but none of that is going to matter nine days from now. Not a good show, but it doesn’t mean a thing anyway.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – March 18, 2008: They’re Out Of Ideas

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 18, 2008
Location: Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Now we continue the lame duck string of shows as there is very little actually going on around here that matters for Wrestlemania. The main ECW involvement is going to be a battle royal for a title shot later on and that isn’t something that is easily built up outside of the Royal Rumble. Maybe they have something else for the next two weeks though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Kane vs. Elijah Burke

Kane snaps off an uppercut to start and Burke bails out to the floor. Burke pulls him outside too and gets driven into the apron for his efforts. Back in and Kane hits a backbreaker before cranking on the neck for a change. That’s broken up and Burke gets in a shot of his own before avoiding a charge in the corner. The Elijah Express is loaded up….and cut off with a chokeslam to give Kane the pin.

Rating: C-. Pretty nothing match here as Kane gets a squash and Burke continues to be little more than a jobber to the stars. Kane is someone who can be pushed as a top star around here as he is the definition of a big fish in a small pond. It’s not like he was doing anything on Smackdown anyway so let him come here and get reheated.

Armando Estrada shakes hands with Mark Henry, who is in the Wrestlemania battle royal. ECW Champion Chavo Guerrero comes in and panics over the giants in the battle royal. Colin Delaney comes in to ask about a contract but Chavo doesn’t like being interrupted. Chavo rants about Delaney being disrespectful and a match is made, with Delaney getting a contract (rather than the title) if he wins.

Video on Floyd Mayweather Jr., the same as on Raw.

Kofi Kingston vs. James Curtis

Kofi shoulders him down to start and grabs a drop toehold as commentary talks about Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather. A headlock takeover has Curtis down again but he fights up and actually takes over for once. Curtis works on an armbar until Kofi upkicks his way to freedom to start the comeback. The double chops set up the double legdrop and the buzzsaw kick finishes for Kofi.

Rating: C. Kofi continues to get built up, at least as much as you can be by beating James Curtis again. What matters is keeping him in the ring and making him look dominant until they find something or him to do. ECW has been needing fresh talent for a long time and Kofi is as good as anyone else they can throw in there.

CM Punk meets Jesse and Festus before their six man tag. Jesse insists that Festus will be fine when the bell rings.

CM Punk/Jesse & Festus vs. Miz/John Morrison/Shelton Benjamin

Festus clears the ring at the bell until he slams Morrison down. Jesse comes in for a basement dropkick before Punk comes in to send Miz and Morrison outside. There’s the springboard spinning crossbody before Festus pulls Benjamin over the top and out onto everyone else in a big crash.

We take a break and come back with Punk kicking Miz in the head (Morrison: “Stay in there Miz! You’re doing good!”). Benjamin pulls Punk off the top though and the villains take over for the first time, despite the CM PUNK chants. We hit the chinlock, followed by an exploder suplex to plant Punk again. Morrison comes back in for a chinlock of his own until Punk fights out. The tag brings in Festus to clean house and everything breaks down. Miz can’t hit the Reality Check, allowing Festus to hit the fireman’s carry flapjack for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was a fun match, as Punk never felt like he was overly worried about any of his opponents. That’s how this match should have gone anyway, as Punk is by far and away bigger than any other regular ECW star right now. Let him have an entertaining match and give Jesse & Festus a win before their Tag Team Title match later this week.

We look back at HHH making John Cena and Randy Orton face the Raw roster this week. Or some of it at least.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Eddie Graham is going into the WWE Hall Of Fame. Now there’s an influence on the business.

Video on Big Show.

Colin Delaney is in the ring and says he’s ready to go, despite JBL beating him up last night.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Colin Delaney

Non-title and Delaney gets a WWE contract if he wins. Chavo pounds him down without much trouble to start but Delaney fights up. A dropkick sends Chavo outside and he isn’t pleased with the developments. Back in and Chavo kicks away before hitting a belly to back suplex. We hit a seated double arm crank for a bit as the slow beating continues. The frog splash (with a lot of trash talk) misses though and Delaney gets a desperation two. Chavo is annoyed and finishes with the Gory Bomb.

Rating: C-. What else were you expecting here? Delaney has been treated as a joke his entire time in ECW and he wasn’t going to pin the champion for his first singles win. The good thing is that they didn’t treat this as anything more than what it should have been, though Delaney getting in a bit of offense here and there is a nice little progression.

Overall Rating: C. This show isn’t much to see at the moment and I don’t see that getting any better next week. The good thing is it seems like we might be in for a change of course after Wrestlemania, as Chavo hasn’t been doing much as ECW Champion and it seems like time to move somewhere else. That doesn’t make the shows on the way there that much better though, as these shows are in a holding pattern as you can get until Wrestlemania.

 

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Smackdown – March 14, 2008: They’re Veering Off

Smackdown
Date: March 14, 2008
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 15,121
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole

We are less than a month away from Wrestlemania and the focus continues to be on Edge vs. the Undertaker. This time though, Edge is veering off to team with the Edgeheads against Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair in a cage match. That’s certainly a unique enough one to go with so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is hometown girl Maria to get things going. She is excited for Bunnymania but tonight, she is hosting the Smackdown Divas Contest so here are the rest of the women. We waste no time in eliminating Maryse, meaning it’s time for this week’s contest. All four of the remaining women (Eve Torres, Michelle McCool, Cherry, Victoria) run the course….with time not counting, because the fan vote decides who is eliminated anyway. McCool wins as at least this was short.

Ric Flair and Shawn Michaels are ready for the main event.

Raw Rebound.

Big Show vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Show shoves them down without much trouble and tosses Yang into Moore in the corner. The chops rock Moore again and Yang gets tossed so hard that he almost spins around. The big right hand pins Moore in a hurry.

Post match Show tosses Yang ala Floyd Mayweather Jr. on Raw.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: John Morrison vs. The Miz

Morrison doesn’t waste time by grabbing a rollup for a fast two. Back up and Miz hits a middle rope clothesline for one and it’s time for Morrison to bail to the floor. Miz cranks on a headlock before forearming away. That’s fine with Morrison, who sweeps the legs into a jackknife rollup for two more. The flipping neckbreaker is blocked though and Miz faceplants him for two of his own. Morrison isn’t pleased and pops back up with the flipping neckbreaker to finish Miz off.

Rating: C-. Very basic match here and that is about all you could expect from them. Miz isn’t that far along (though he’s coming) and Morrison is the bigger and more successful star. No one would buy Miz as a threat to win the briefcase and while Morrison isn’t that much better of an option, he’s the better option than Miz at the moment.

Video on JBL vs. Finlay, leading to their Belfast Brawl at Wrestlemania.

Finlay joins us via satellite, saying there are no words to describe what it’s like to look at Hornswoggle in his hospital bed. At Wrestlemania, there will be no words to describe the beating he is going to give JBL.

US Title: MVP vs. Batista

MVP is defending and this is no holds barred. They go nose to nose to start until MVP bails to the floor to avoid a charge. Back in and Batista sends him face first into the buckle before a big kick to the chest gets two. An elbow to the head gives Batista two more but MVP is right back up with an overhead belly to belly of all things. MVP gets smart by hitting him in the face with a chain and then chokes away with it back inside.

Batista breaks that up so MVP tears off a buckle pad, only to walk into a spinebuster. It’s too early for Batista to follow up though and MVP gets in a chair shot to the ribs. They go outside with MVP being sent into the barricade and Batista being sent into the post. A low blow gives MVP a needed breather and there’s a running boot to the face as we take a break.

Back with both of them still down on the floor until Batista has to spear a chair out of MVP’s hands. That doesn’t keep MVP down very long though as he chairs Batista in the leg to take over again. MVP takes too long (common theme in this one) peeling back the ring mats though and now it’s Batista getting in his own chair shot. Back in and MVP sends him face first into the exposed buckle to knock Batista silly. For some reason MVP goes up with the chair, allowing Batista to get up. Not that it matters though as cue Umaga to Samoan Spike Batista down, allowing MVP to retain the title.

Rating: C+. This should be it for the feud as Batista now has an even bigger reason to focus on Umaga and Wrestlemania. The ending was the logical way to go as you need to keep Batista strong and MVP…well he’s lost so many times already that it’s hard to believe that there is much left for his reign anyway. What matters here is they wrapped up one feud and moved on to another and at least MVP got a pin for once.

Video on Floyd Mayweather Jr. vs. Big Show.

Kane/Jamie Noble vs. Great Khali/Chuck Palumbo

Palumbo slugs away at Kane to start, which goes about as well as you are probably imagining. Noble, with his bad ribs, comes in and is quickly dropped, allowing Khali to come in and go after the ribs. Some shots to Khali have no effect but Palumbo gets in a cheap shot from the apron anyway. The chokebomb finishes Noble fast.

The cage is lowered.

The Brisco Brothers are going into the Hall Of Fame.

Ric Flair/Shawn Michaels vs. Edge/Edgeheads

In a cage with escape only rules. Hold on though as here is Vickie Guerrero to say we’re adding in someone else. Cue Chavo Guerrero and this is going to be 4-2. We’re joined in progress with the big fight on and Edge spears Flair down to make the numbers game even worse. Shawn gets tied up in the ropes and there’s a spear against the cage or him too.

That leaves him to see an already bloody Flair get rammed into the cage but Shawn is untied and stomped in the corner. Flair manages a few right hands but Edge rakes him face first into the cage. Shawn fights up and Flair does the same, only to have Shawn get tied up in the Tree of Woe for a spear from Edge. Somehow Flair chops away at Edge and the Edgeheads and Shawn manages to knock a diving Chavo out of the air.

A low blow drops Edge and Shawn hits the forearm into the nip up. The villains are sent into the cage over and over and there’s the top rope elbow to Hawkins. Edge spears Chavo by mistake and the double Figure Fours go on. Chavo breaks them up with a double frog splash….and Undertaker is here. Undertaker goes after Edge but a distraction lets him escape the cage for the win.

Rating: C. This was weird as it didn’t really do anything other than put a bunch of people in the cage at once before Undertaker popped in to give them an ending. It felt like they just said “oh do whatever” and moved on, which doesn’t make for the most interesting of matches. That being said, it’s more interesting than a regular tag match and I guess Flair’s loss doesn’t count because he wasn’t directly beaten?

Overall Rating: C. We seem to be entering into the portion of the Wrestlemania build where they have everything set and just need to focus on that instead of anything new. That doesn’t make for the most interesting show, but it’s nice to have a plan and then go forward with it. With only two weeks to go before Wrestlemania, we could be in for some very different shows, but that doesn’t mean they’re all going to be thrilling.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – March 7, 2008: Go The Other Way

Smackdown
Date: March 7, 2008
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

Wrestlemania is less than a month away and that means we should be seeing some of the lower level matches starting to come together. Most of the card is already set with Undertaker vs. Edge feeling like a huge match. Other than that we have Batista vs. Umaga in a Raw vs. Smackdown match and Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr. in a match that could go on either show. We’ll need more than that so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with Vickie Guerrero and Edge, with Teddy Long in the corner, on the Cutting Edge. After praising Vickie, Edge talks about how he has never lost to Undertaker, making him the real Phenom. Vickie makes Edge/the Edgeheads vs. Undertaker for tonight, which Edge finds very hot. With that out of the way, there is someone else who is going to be losing his 35 year career at Wrestlemania.

That brings us to tonight’s guest, so here is Ric Flair. Edge welcomes him to the show but wants to know what it’s going to be like when Flair loses at Wrestlemania. Flair promises to beat Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania but Edge doesn’t exactly sound convinced. Fans: “YOU SUCK!” Flair: “Your fans are talking to her.” Edge asks Flair about losing to the Undertaker at Wrestlemania, which Flair says is something you never forget.

Losing to Undertaker didn’t hurt his career, but he came at it differently. Edge is the one with a sham of a relationship, which sends Vickie into a rant. After calming her down, Edge says Flair needs to watch the handicap match tonight, because he’ll have his own next week. Oh and let’s make that a cage match. Edge WOOs in his face but gets slapped, with Flair bailing from violence.

CM Punk/Jesse & Festus vs. Miz/John Morrison/Chavo Guerrero

That’s quite the good guy team. Festus clears the ring at the bell until we settle down with Miz vs. Punk to start. Miz manages a quick hot shot and brings in Chavo, who gets backdropped just as fast. Jesse comes in for a backdrop and basement dropkick but Morrison shoves him off the top. This has Festus ready to smash but we take a break instead (probably a good idea).

We take a break and come back with Morrison working on Jesse’s arm. That doesn’t last long either as Jesse slips away and hands it off to Festus to clean house. Everything breaks down with Jesse and Punk hitting dives onto Morrison and Chavo. Back in and the fireman’s carry flapjack gives Festus the pin on Miz.

Rating: C. What else were you expecting here? The good thing is that we didn’t have to sit through too much more of Chavo vs. Punk, as that is a match that has been driven into the ground in recent weeks. Other than that, Miz and Morrison get beaten again, even if it is from a team that is little more than a one off idea. Just find some more interesting challengers for both titles. It shouldn’t be that hard.

Jamie Noble is in the back with Michelle McCool and says he knows she has a thing for him. Noble gets it, but he’s a one woman man. She’s ok with it, and seem to have thought the same thing as Noble.

US Title: MVP vs. Batista

MVP is defending. They fight over a lockup to start with Batista powering him outside without much trouble. Back in and Batista knocks him outside again, though this time he follows him out to keep up the beating. They get back in with Batista starting in on the leg for a change, including a half crab. That’s enough for MVP to bail to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Batista hitting a running corner clothesline but MVP kicks the leg out. A running boot to the head, with the bad leg, gives MVP a bit of a desperation two and we hit the chinlock. Another kick to the leg takes Batista back down and a facebuster, on the bad knee, gives MVP a delayed two. It might not sound logical, but commentary is selling the idea that MVP is desperate to fight Batista so it does make some sense.

MVP kicks him out to the floor for another two and we’re off to a leglock to keep Batista down. Back up and MVP misses the running boot in the corner, allowing Batista to come back with the swinging Boss Man Slam for two. The spinebuster crushes MVP, whose low blow is blocked without much effort. They fight outside with Batista keeping up the beating, but MVP kicks him into the announcers’ table and beats the count to win.

Rating: C+. Well, at least MVP didn’t lose again. This screams setup for another match, hopefully where MVP can retain the title by pinning Batista, likely through some kind of shenanigans. These two got some time here and it was a decent match, though Batista in the US Title scene feels so out of place and it’s hard to fathom in a lot of ways.

We look at Hornswoggle being beaten down again.

Jamie Noble interrupts Edge and Vickie Guerrero, saying he wants a match with Chuck Palumbo. Vickie is annoyed so she gives him Big Show instead.

Mae Young Hall Of Fame video.

Kim Kardashian will be the guest hostess at Wrestlemania.

And now, a Divas swimsuit contest, featuring Eve Torres, Cherry, Maryse, Michelle McCool and Victoria. Apparently this is the first week of a four week competition to determine the Top Diva on Smackdown with one woman being eliminated each week. Not only will the winner get bragging rights but they will also win a….custom motorcycle? They all disrobe (Cherry looks nervous and Victoria dances badly) and we get the results next week because this is another Diva Search style contest. Oh and a fight breaks out because of course it does.

Video on Rey Mysterio being injured and having to undergo bicep surgery.

Kane vs. Chuck Palumbo

Kane powers him into the corner to start but Palumbo is back with some right hands of his own. A clothesline gives Palumbo two but Kane grabs the side slam. Palumbo tries to headbutt his way out of the chokeslam, only to get chokeslammed for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. Palumbo was trying here but we are way beyond the point of him meaning anything. The feud with Jamie Noble worked for a little while and then just went on for so much longer than it needed to that it killed any momentum. Kane is getting back on a roll and there is no reason to have him be in any major threat from Palumbo here.

Big Show vs. Jamie Noble

Show throws him into the corner and gets kicked low for the DQ in short order.

Show shrugs it off and chops Noble down before promising to end Floyd Mayweather Jr.’s career at Wrestlemania.

Raw Rebound.

Undertaker vs. Edge/Edgeheads

Undertaker beats up Hawkins to start and throws him into the corner, allowing Ryder to come in and get beaten down as well. Edge certainly seems nervous as Undertaker kicks Ryder in the head. A cheap shot cuts Undertaker off though and Edge gets to hammer away for a bit. The Edgeheads take turns splashing Undertaker but Edge’s swinging neckbreaker is countered into a DDT. Old School is loaded up but a distraction means that it has to be switched into a top rope armdrag (ok then). The Edgeheads distract Undertaker again though and Edge hits the spear for the pin.

Rating: C-. It was quick and to the point here but at least Edge finally got something over on Undertaker. You can only have Undertaker beat him up every week for so long before it stops having any real impact. There is almost no way that Undertaker is leaving Wrestlemania without the title, but at least they are putting on a good story on the way there.

Edge and Undertaker glare at each other to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. They were going up and down this week and that wasn’t the most thrilling show. Undertaker vs. Edge is good and Batista vs. MVP, while not a long term story, is doing well enough, but stuff like the women fighting over a motorcycle isn’t exactly thrilling. Get rid of some of the lame parts and the better portions can take over.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – March 4, 2008: They Need To Pull Over

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 4, 2008
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re still on the Road to Wrestlemania and somehow, again, we’re getting CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero for the latter’s ECW Title. This is setting a new standard for trying to squeeze every last drop out of an idea and there absolutely cannot be much left to wring out of the feud. Maybe tonight can wrap it up for good. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at the last month or so of CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero, because the feud is so long that you can trim it down like that.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Colin Delaney/Tommy Dreamer

Delaney and Dreamer are challenging after beating the champs in a non-title match last week. Dreamer and Miz start things off with Miz being taken down rather quickly. A Quebecers’ Cannonball hits Miz for two but he’s right back up to drive Delaney into the corner. Morrison comes in for the springboard spinning kick to the head but Delaney manages to kick him away.

The tag brings in Dreamer to a rather nothing reaction and a neckbreaker out of the corner for one on Morrison. The Texas Cloverleaf goes on but Miz makes the save, knocks Delaney to the floor and hammers Dreamer down. That’s too far for Delaney, who grabs a chair and cleans house for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Yeah this wasn’t much to see and that’s because there was no way the titles were going to change here. Delaney and Dreamer are some teacher/student deal and it is getting better over the weeks, but that doesn’t mean they were ready to become champions. Points for making someone new though, which has been lacking around here for a good bit.

Post match Dreamer looks stunned but also rather pleased with the violence. Ignore Delaney costing them the title shot.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Stevie Richards

Benjamin’s original Ain’t No Stopping Me Now music is gone, taking away one of the catchier themes from the era. Richards grabs a headlock to start but Benjamin pulls him out of the air for a shoulder breaker to take over. An armbar and them a figure four arm lock (Tazz’s words) keep Richards in trouble.

Benjamin elbows him in the face and grabs the same arm lock as things grind to another halt. Back up and Benjamin jumps to the top, only to miss a high crossbody. We get some weak SHELTON chants as Richards makes the comeback, including an enziguri for two. That’s too far for Benjamin, who hits the jumping Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was as interesting as Benjamin working the arm for two minutes out of less than five was going to be. The new Benjamin is just so lame with the gold hair and the weaker music, but at least they’re pushing someone who still has some star power. Also, so much for Richards’ push, but I don’t know what kinds of legs it had in the first place.

Post match Benjamin promises to win Money In The Bank.

We recap the reveal of Maria’s Playboy cover.

Kofi Kingston and Kelly Kelly are admiring the Playboy cover, with Kingston saying she could be a Playboy cover girl. With that kind of creepy line out of the way, Layla comes in to yell at Kelly about Playboy wanting Layla instead. Catfighting ensues, likely over who could be a worse actress.

Kane vs. James Gibson

Before the match, Chuck Palumbo, who is facing Kane on Smackdown, rides to the ring on his motorcycle. Not that it matters as the chokeslam finishes Gibson in about thirty seconds.

Raw Rebound.

CM Punk talks about how Chavo Guerrero claims to be a warrior, but there is one Guerrero who is a warrior and it isn’t Chavo. Punk talks about the things he’s done to Chavo and promises to regain the title tonight.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero is defending. Feeling out process to start as Chavo takes him into the corner, only to get rolled up for a fast two. A hammerlock slam sets up an armbar from Punk, which is quickly reversed into a headlock. With that broken up, Punk tries a springboard but gets knocked out to the floor in a pretty nasty crash.

We take a break and come back with Chavo working on the leg, including a chop block to cut him down again. The leg is wrapped around the post and Chavo seems rather confident. We hit the leg crank but Punk manages to use the good leg to kick Chavo outside. Back in and Punk grabs an armbar, only to have Chavo pull him into a half crab. The rope is grabbed so Chavo plants him with a tornado DDT for two instead. Punk catches him going up but gets knocked back down, setting up the frog splash to retain the title.

Rating: C+. They’re done now right? Chavo has beaten Punk multiple times now and this one was completely clean so the feud is over. There is nothing left for these two to do with each other and it is time for both of them to move on. I’m not sure what that will mean for Chavo, but Punk is more than ready to move up to one of the other shows.

Overall Rating: C. This show is in need of a fresh tank of gas as they seem to be running on empty. Miz and Morrison vs. Delaney and Dreamer is the second biggest story on the show and that has the shelf life of some week old bread. Other than that, you have Benjamin minus the fun stuff and Kane warmed up for something on Smackdown. What does that leave for this show? Decent main event this week and nothing else.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – February 26, 2008: Blech Is Never A Good Description

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: February 26, 2008
Location: Convention Center, Tuscon, Arizona
Attendance: 5,200
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re on the way to Wrestlemania and this week isn’t likely to have Ric Flair for a main event. Chavo Guerrero vs. CM Punk should be done for good but you never can tell with that feud. It feels like it could somehow keep going despite being long past its expiration date. If not Punk though, who else is supposed to go after the title? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Kelly Kelly/Kofi Kingston vs. Santino Marella/Layla

The women start things off as Tazz talks about some 80s song. Actually we’ll switch to the men as Kelly has to bring in “Koko Kingston”. That’s fine with Kofi, who knocks Marella into the corner and hammers away. Back up and Santino gets in a cheap shot to take over and a clothesline allows for some posing.

Layla even gets in some hair pulling from the apron, allowing Santino to work on an armbar. For some reason Santino tags Layla in, which is as good as Kofi tagging Kelly. Some clotheslines drop Layla and Kelly hits a high crossbody for one as everything breaks down. Trouble In Paradise drops Santino and a Fameasser gives Kelly the pin.

Rating: C-. This was as good as Santino doing his lame offense to Kofi for a few minutes before the women came in for the finish was going to be. Santino is a fun character but he doesn’t exactly have the in-ring work to back it up in any way. Kofi continues to feel like someone WWE is protecting and that is a good sign for his future.

Bunnymania is coming at Wrestlemania.

Video on Maria’s Playboy shoot.

Stevie Richards vs. Mike Knox

Knox, ever the villain, goes for the throat to start and a hot shot cuts off a comeback attempt. The slow beating is on and Knox grabs a chinlock to stay on the throat. That’s switched into a choke so the fans start begging for the comeback. Richards comes up with a superkick but the StevieT is blocked. Instead Richards avoids a charge into the corner and now the StevieT is enough to finish Knox off.

Rating: D+. Do you know how fast someone with the limited offense of Knox is going to run out of throat based moves? Richards has a good story, but there is only so much that you can do with it week after week. Yeah he has a bad throat, but if that’s all you’re getting, how far is this supposed to go?

Tommy Dreamer tells Colin Delaney that he as a future as his injuries are starting to heal. Delaney asks if he can have his own theme music when he becomes a star. Dreamer glares at him.

Raw Rebound.

Commentary gets serious about the Vince McMahon/JBL/Hornswoggle/Finlay ordeal.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Tommy Dreamer/Colin Delaney

Non-title. Dreamer armdrags Morrison down to start but Delaney tags himself in (Dreamer: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”) and hits a dropkick. Morrison takes him down without much trouble though and it’s off to Miz to hammer away in the corner. The backbreaker/slingshot elbow combination gives Morrison two and it’s back to Miz for a chinlock. Delaney fights up and Dreamer gets the tag to start the house cleaning. A reverse DDT plants Miz and Morrison is sent outside. Dreamer sends Miz into Delaney and the DDT is good for the pin.

Rating: C-. It might make sense in the story but Dreamer and Delaney just beat the Tag Team Champions completely clean. That’s not the best thing to see and while Miz and Morrison aren’t likely to drop the titles, it feels like a repeat of the Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore feud. Just stop having the champs get pinned.

Video on the Wrestlemania press conference, with the focus on Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Miz and John Morrison are yelling at each other when they’re told Tommy Dreamer and Colin Delaney are getting a Tag Team Title shot next week. They aren’t scared.

CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke vs. Shelton Benjamin

The winner gets an ECW Title shot against Chavo Guerrero, on commentary, next week. The fans are behind Punk as Benjamin kicks Burke to the floor. Chavo: “I would have ducked.” Benjamin knocks Punk down but Burke low bridges him outside to even things up a bit. Back in and Punk grabs a slightly scary flapjack on Burke but Benjamin comes in for the jumping Downward Spiral to drop Punk.

We take a break and come back with Benjamin sunset bombing Punk to the floor but getting dropkicked off the apron by Burke. The Outer Limits elbow gets two on Punk and the running crotch attack to the back of the next hits Benjamin as Burke is the only one left standing. Punk pulls Burke off the top, only to get caught with Benjamin’s dragon whip to cut him down as well. Burke knocks Benjamin out to the floor but Punk is back up with the GTS for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C+. They didn’t hide what they were going to do with the winner here and that isn’t the worst thing. That being said, I’m completely burned out on Punk vs. Chavo, but who else is there to go after the title? ECW is really weak on top faces right now and I don’t think I can see Stevie Richards getting a title shot. That leaves Punk, and that isn’t much to write home about at the moment.

Post match Guerrero gets in the ring for the staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Blech, what a weak show this was, with Kofi vs. Santino being one of the more interesting things going on. You can only get so much with this limited of a roster and no one else to challenge Chavo, so this was more a matter of time than anything else. The main event was fine, but I need more than Punk vs. Chavo 47 or whatever it is to pique my interest.

 

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Smackdown – February 22, 2008: Fix The Monster Problem

Smackdown
Date: February 22, 2008
Location: Sports Arena, San Diego, California
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re done with No Way Out and Edge is still the World Champion, meaning he is set to defend the title against the Undertaker at Wrestlemania. That could be in for a long build and the question now is what else will be on the Wrestlemania card. They have some work to do to get it ready so let’s get to it.

Here is No Way Out if you need a recap.

We look at Undertaker winning the Elimination Chamber to become #1 contender.

Opening sequence.

Here are Edge and the Edgeheads to get things going. Edge brags about retaining the World Title at No Way Out because the three of them hurt Rey Mysterio last week in Chile. Now he is on to Wrestlemania to face the Undertaker at Wrestlemania, where Edge wants to cement his legacy by ending the Streak. Edge has his own Wrestlemania undefeated streak and something has to give. He goes against the impossible and succeeds, which is why he will succeed.

For fifteen years, everyone has asked who will finally defeat the Undertaker (eh, more like the last seven or eight) and he will not fall. This year it all ends because he is that man. Then the gong strikes and here is Undertaker to beat up the Edgeheads, who offer enough of a distraction for Edge to escape. Perfectly fine first segment for the feud.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Shelton powers him into the corner to start and drives some shoulders to the ribs. Yang fights out, only to get buckle bombed HARD into the corner. The chinlock goes on for a bit before a t-bone suplex cuts off Yang’s comeback. A backbreaker keeps Yang in trouble before Benjamin puts him up top. Yang shoves him away, only to have Benjamin jump up to the top for an overhead belly to belly superplex.

Another buckle bomb is countered with a hurricanrana and a spinning headscissors drops Benjamin again. The running spinwheel kick in the corner sets up a high crossbody for two on Benjamin, followed by a sunset flip out of the corner for the same. That’s enough for Benjamin, who avoids the moonsault press and hits the jumping Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C. Yang is a good example of someone who has been built up well enough to be a bit of a headache for Benjamin. There was no way Yang was going to get in a match like Money In The Bank, but at least they didn’t have the match be total dominance. This was a completely watchable match and that’s more than I was expecting.

Teddy Long runs into the returning Maryse, who says she hasn’t been around for a long time. She would like to ask him something….in his office.

Jesse And Festus vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino. Festus headbutts Deuce down to start and it’s off to Jesse for a drop toehold. Jesse sends him outside but a Cherry distraction lets Domino get in a cheap shot. We hit the chinlock back inside (with Jesse looking like he is tapping) before Jesse is draped over the top for a forearm to the back from Domino. Back up and Festus adds a headbutt from the apron, allowing Jesse to hit his own headbutt. That’s enough for the hot tag to Festus so house can be cleaned in a hurry. A Rocket Launcher finishes Domino.

Rating: C. Festus is a fun act, but you can only get so much out of the idea of Jesse does a regular match and then tags Festus to wreck things. That doesn’t have the longest shelf life and it is already starting to lose steam. Festus has something with the idea, but there is only so much that can be done with what is basically a one man team.

Raw Rebound.

Video on the South American tour.

Big Daddy V. vs. Shannon Moore

Matt Striker is here with V. Moore gets shoved down to start and his kicks just annoy V a bit more. The swinging Boss Man Slam plants Moore and V sends him flying again. A missed charge lets Moore kick away a few times until V runs him own. The really big elbow finishes Moore off.

Rating: D+. If WWE insists on pushing V as the monster over and over, he needs a win like this every so often. This was almost a total squash and Moore probably got in more than he should have. Moore getting crushed isn’t a bad thing, but V has lost so much that it has me wondering how many more times they can keep reheating him.

MVP vs. Batista

Non-title. During his entrance, we get an inset promo from MVP, saying Batista can’t beat him twice in a row. Batista drives him into the corner to start before going with a boot into MVP’s banged up back. MVP manages to send him face first into the buckle though and a forearm to the back of the head drops Batista for a change.

The running big boot to the side of the head knocks Batista off the apron and MVP hammers away back inside. We hit the chinlock so Batista fights up, only to get sent right back to the floor in a bit of a surprise. The front facelock goes on back inside, setting up a facebuster for two on Batista. That doesn’t last long though as Batista is back with three straight spinebusters and the Batista Bomb finishes fast.

Rating: C. Oh yeah MVP is in that bad place, as he is losing over and over again while still US Champion. In other words, WWE seems to think that he is bulletproof and that means he is going to lose more and more. Why Batista needed to beat him again isn’t the most clear concept, but I would bet on a reaction of “oh well” as they move on.

We get a medical update on Hornswoggle after he got beaten down so badly on Raw. Naturally we see the beatdown, which commentary describes as so horrible.

Great Khali vs. Kane

Kane slugs away to start and gets hit in the face for his efforts. Khali gets knocked back into the corner but a clothesline of his own puts Kane back down. The slugout continues with Kane hitting an uppercut but getting caught going up top. We hit the nerve hold and then the Vice Grip but Kane kicks off the corner and falls backwards for the pin.

Rating: D. It was a bunch of punches and chops before the fluke ending to keep Khali looking strong. Kane was trying here but what exactly is he supposed to do in a situation like this? Khali continues to be so limited in the ring, but much like Big Daddy V, it stops meaning anything when he loses over and over again.

Video on the Streak.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Matt Jackson

Yes that Matt Jackson and Palumbo runs him over with a clothesline to start. Jackson hits a dropkick as Michelle McCool is watching in the back. Palumbo knocks him to the floor for a fall away slam, followed by a clothesline back inside. The Full Throttle finishes Jackson fast.

Here is Rey Mysterio for an update on his health. Rey gets right to the point: he has a torn bicep and needs surgery. Unfortunately the surgery will take place this weekend, so he won’t be at Wrestlemania. If this is the last time that he is going to be in the ring for a long time, there is no better place to be than in San Diego.

Cue Vickie Guerrero to say she doesn’t care if Rey is hurt because he ruined her moment last week. We see Rey “accidentally” hitting Vickie with a springboard seated senton last week and Rey still isn’t very sorry. Vickie doesn’t want to hear it, but Rey has a match RIGHT NOW, injury or not.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title. Chavo charges at him to start and hammers away with Rey falling around the ring. Rey manages a hurricanrana but gets faceplanted to cut that off in a hurry. We take a break and come back with Chavo working on the arm. Rey even has to go to the ropes to escape, leaving Chavo to baseball slide him to the floor. Back in and Rey manages another headscissors, setting up the running seated senton off the apron.

Chavo catches Rey up top back inside, only to get knocked down to set up a top rope seated senton. The basement dropkick gets two more and the 619 has Chavo down. Rey’s arm won’t let him hit the springboard though, allowing Chavo to catch him on top. Three Amigos have Rey in trouble but he avoids the frog splash, allowing Rey to come back with a sunset flip for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. Given Rey’s injury, this went about as well as it could have gone. That being said, it doesn’t say much when Chavo, the reigning ECW Champion, knew this was coming and was healthy but still lost anyway. WWE already hasn’t exactly made ECW look good and now it is even worse with this latest development as Rey is on the way out.

Post match Vickie says it’s her turn to hurt Rey….so here is Big Show to lay Rey out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Edge vs. Undertaker is going to be fine but they didn’t exactly do anything to start another feud here. Rey was written off due to his injury for the sake of crushing him in his hometown, but we knew he was already heading off for surgery. Throw in a bunch of pretty ok at best matches and there just wasn’t much worth seeing as we start the Road To Wrestlemania.

 

 

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No Way Out 2008 (2022 Redo): The Focus Shifts

No Way Out 2008
Date: February 17, 2008
Location: Thomas & Mack Center, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 15,240
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re on the Road To Wrestlemania and in this case, WWE is embracing the more is more philosophy. We have a pair of Elimination Chamber matches with the winners going on to the World Title matches at Wrestlemania. In addition, we have John Cena vs. Randy Orton for the Raw World Title, which should feel quite big. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about the Road To Wrestlemania going into a place that has no way out. We shift into a traditional Chamber video, as it continues to seem almost sentient given the descriptions.

We recap CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero for the ECW World Title. Guerrero cheated to beat Punk so Punk threw him in the Gulf of Mexico and is using his rematch here. As all great feuds go.

ECW World Title: CM Punk vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero is defending and slaps him in the face to start, earning himself a kick to the head. Punk gets sent outside and tripped face first onto the apron to put him in some early trouble. Back in and Chavo hits a suplex, thankfully without an Eddie reference. A bodyscissors (you don’t see that one very often) is countered into a catapult but Punk’s GTS is countered into a hurricanrana.

Punk kicks him into the head and goes into the Eddie Dance/Three Amigos, which is pretty soundly booed, even to the point of the crowd chanting for Chavo in a weird moment. Another kick puts Chavo on the floor so Punk puts him on top. The super hurricanrana is blocked though and a frog splash retains the title.

Rating: C. They didn’t have time to do much here but this feud needs to wrap up already. There is nothing left for these two to do to each other and this was a pretty clear ending. Chavo needs a fresh challenger and there is nothing left for Punk to do in ECW. Punk is going to be fine moving forward, but I’m not sure who can go after Chavo right now.

We look back at Rey Mysterio hitting a springboard seated senton on Vickie Guerrero this week on Smackdown.

Mysterio said it was an accident but he isn’t apologizing to Vickie. Oh and he has a torn bicep but is wrestling anyway. Floyd Mayweather Jr. comes in for a pep talk, though the fans don’t seem impressed.

The Chamber is lowered.

Video on the Elimination Chamber.

Undertaker vs. Great Khali vs. Big Daddy V vs. MVP vs. Finlay vs. Batista

For the Smackdown World Title shot at Wrestlemania (and MVP’s US Title isn’t on the line) and inside the Elimination Chamber. Batista is in at #1 and Undertaker is in at #2 so they’re certainly starting big. They slug it out (duh) to start until Batista gets him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. That earns him a right hand over the ropes and it’s time to go fight on the steel. A face rake across the steel fires Batista up enough to knock Undertaker back inside, where Undertaker chokes in the corner. Undertaker stomps him down but an exchange of big boots gives us a double knockdown.

Big Daddy V is in at #3 to slam both of them down a few times. A headbutt knocks Undertaker out of the Chamber (that’s a new one) and he seems to be favoring his arm as a running splash against the wall crushes Undertaker back inside. Batista manages a spinebuster to V and Undertaker adds a DDT onto the Chamber to get rid of V (as pinfalls are now legal outside of the ring).

Great Khali is in at #4 and strikes away as the fans decide that the wrestler who is currently wrestling can’t wrestle. The chokebomb gets two on Undertaker and there’s the Vice Grip to Batista. With that broken up, Undertaker boots Batista in the face and chokes Khali out for the elimination. Undertaker rakes Batista against the cage until Finlay is in at #5. A missed big boot in the corner lets Finlay Celtic Cross Undertaker for two. Coach: “How is the Undertaker doing this?” Cole: “He’s the Undertaker.”

Finlay sends Undertaker into the cage wall for two but Undertaker knocks the other two down. MVP is in at #6….or at least he should be, as he stays in the pod. That’s not going to work for Undertaker, who drags him back in as Batista is up again. MVP uses a chain to knock down the monsters and Undertaker is busted open. Back up and Undertaker talks MVP to the top of the pod, where a super chokeslam brings him crashing back down. Finlay steals the pin to get rid of MVP and we’re down to three.

Undertaker misses a top rope elbow to Finlay though and here’s Hornswoggle to throw in a shillelagh. The shot to the head gets two on Batista but Undertaker is back up with a chokeslam onto the steel to Finlay for the elimination. Believe it or not, we come down to Batista vs. Undertaker for the title shot and they both have to pull themselves up. Batista is busted open as well and the big slugout is on with Batista hitting a quick Namesake Bomb for two.

For some reason Batista sees no problem with hammering down right hands in the corner, meaning the Last Ride gets two. Undertaker hammers away but gets clotheslined over the top and onto the steel. Batista follows as Undertaker seems to be favoring his arm so Batista tries a ram into the barricade. It’s just try because Undertaker blocks the contact and hits a Tombstone for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: B-. There were two options here so this got a lot more interesting once they got rid of the people who were there to fill in spots. Big Daddy V. and Great Khali were never going to be any kind of a serious threat, but unfortunately the US Champion isn’t anything resembling a threat here. Undertaker vs. Batista was good enough, but they went smart by keeping that part short. Solid enough match here, though it could have used a third potential winner, if there is such a thing on Smackdown these days.

Edge wants the Edgeheads ready to help him with Rey Mysterio, but Teddy Long comes in to ban them from ringside for the title match.

Maria and Ashley are at the Playboy Mansion in an effort to get Maria to pose. I’m sure that is still up in the air at this point.

Ric Flair vs. Mr. Kennedy

Flair is coming in with a bad knee. Kennedy shoulders him down and mocks the strut so Flair hits a chop and shows him how it’s done. That’s enough for Kennedy to smarten up and go after the knee to take over. The half crab goes on and a rather swearing Flair makes the rope, meaning Kennedy puts on the Figure Four around the post. The regular Figure Four stays on the leg but the rope is grabbed again. Back up and a Regal Roll gives Kennedy two but Flair is back with some chop blocks. Flair gets the real Figure Four on and Kennedy taps rather quickly.

Rating: C-. That felt like it could have been on a house show and that is rarely a good sign on TV. Flair gets to keep going and I don’t know if there was much doubt about him losing at No Way Out. They had put together a pretty nice feud on the way here but then the match was just kind of there. I’m actually a bit disappointed for once and that’s not something I was expecting from this one.

Finlay is getting his back worked on when Vince McMahon comes in and promises violence to Hornswoggle tomorrow.

We recap Edge vs. Rey Mysterio for the Smackdown World Title. Edge retained the title with help from Vickie Guerrero at the Royal Rumble so the rematch was set. Vickie was taken out on Smackdown, but it might not matter as Rey has a torn bicep, meaning this might not be so great.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Rey Mysterio

Edge is defending and the Edgeheads are barred from ringside. Rey backs into the corner as Edge certainly knows about the bad arm. A hurricanrana sends Edge into the corner and Rey has to use left handed punches which has to be so awkward. Edge shrugs them off and takes Rey outside for a whip into the steps. Back in and Edge slowly hammers away before a headscissors sends him down for a crotching against the post. A left arm DDT gives Rey two and the 619 connects but the arm gives out. Rey’s springboard is speared out of the air to retain the title fast.

Rating: C. I can’t possibly put this one on them as Rey could barely do anything. They went just over five minutes and that was probably agony throughout. It’s better than no match and they did play into the arm injury to make sense. Rey is probably going to be gone for a long time but he certainly tried on his way out.

Post match Edge leaves and….here is the returning Big Show, for the first time in over a year. Show is glad to be back and says he’ll be a champion again on Raw, Smackdown or ECW. He’s been champion at all of those places and he’ll do it again, but he isn’t here to make guarantees. Since he’s been gone he’s lost 108lbs and now he is a lot meaner. To show this, he goes outside and grabs Rey by the throat while taunting Floyd Mayweather Jr. at ringside.

Mayweather jumps the barricade and gets inside, with security and his entourage right behind him. Show drops to his knee in front of Mayweather, who fires off some crazy fast punches to bust Show’s nose. Mayweather sprints off and Show gives chase, with Shane McMahon of all people having to calm him down. Show leaves, unfortunately not asking Shane “which way did he go”. So there’s your Wrestlemania celebrity match.

Mike Adamle throws us to the recap video for Randy Orton defending the Raw World Title against John Cena. Back in October, Cena got hurt and had to forfeit the title, which Orton somehow got twice in one night. Cena then returned at the Royal Rumble and won the whole thing, but is cashing in his title match here instead of at Wrestlemania (which apparently you can just do).

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Cena is challenging and we even get an old school weapons check. An early small package has Orton a bit nervous and Cena rolls him up for two more to make it worse. The fans are a bit split here as Orton knocks him down and starts the stomping. More stomping puts Cena down in the corner and the referee is actually asking if he wants to give up. Does he not get the whole Cena thing?

Cena hits a bulldog and drops an elbow for two but Orton cuts him off with a clothesline for the same. The fans are split again as Orton punches him out to the apron, only to get caught with the top rope Fameasser for two. The FU is countered into an uppercut (which looked like an RKO setup) and there’s the circle stomp. We hit the chinlock until Cena powers up and initiates the finishing sequence. Orton slips out of the FU again though and bails to the floor.

Back in and Orton grabs the backbreaker before avoiding another Cena top rope Fameasser. Instead Cena grabs the ProtoBomb into the STFU, with Orton having to bail to the ropes. That’s enough to send Orton bailing to the floor, where he grabs his knee and demands a countout. Cena won’t be having that and walks right into the RKO on the floor. Cena beats the count back in….so Orton hits the referee for the DQ escape.

Rating: B-. The ending was there to set up the rematch, as I don’t think anyone is going to buy that Cena’s big moment is coming at No Way Out. It seems ripe for the setup of another match, with Orton getting rather annoyed at his plan not working. The match was good as expected between these two, but the ending might as well have been a To Be Continued sign.

Post match Cena grabs the STFU to choke Orton out.

HHH and Shawn Michaels are going to be cool with each other no matter what happens in the Chamber.

HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Umaga vs. JBL vs. Chris Jericho vs. Jeff Hardy

For the Raw World Title shot at Wrestlemania and Hardy’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line. Jericho is in at #1 and Shawn is in at #2, which should make for a nice four minutes. Feeling out process to start before they go with the hard chops into a pinfall reversal sequence. Jericho cuts it off with a clothesline so Shawn hits one of his own. The top rope elbow only hits Jericho’s raised knees but manages to block the Walls. Back up and the collide, with Umaga coming in at #3.

A double clothesline takes both heroes down and Umaga makes it even worse with a double Samoan drop. Shawn gets kicked out onto the steel but Jericho avoids a middle rope headbutt. That lets Shawn go up for the top rope elbow to the back and Jericho grabs the logical Walls. Shawn adds a Crossface but it’s JBL in at #4 to break it up for whatever reason. Some kicks to the face (including Shawn’s bloody one) have the good guys in trouble and Umaga gets up to help JBL with the beatdown (a JBL/Umaga alliance seems odd as Umaga with money would be….weird).

HHH is in at #5 and goes after everyone not named Shawn. A DDT gets two on JBL and Umaga is sent head first (and HARD) into the pod. The Clothesline From JBL drops HHH but Jericho Codebreakers JBL for the pin. Hold on though as JBL grabs a chair and knocks Jericho/HHH/Umaga silly, with Jericho being busted open.

Jeff Hardy is in at #6 to complete the field and starts fast by mule kicking Umaga into the corner. A Whisper in the Wind drops HHH and Shawn but Umaga is back up to knock Hardy down. The swinging release Rock Bottom plants Jericho before hitting a SCARY running hip attack to drive him through the pod. Somehow Jericho isn’t in multiple pieces as it’s a superkick into a Codebreaker into a Pedigree into a Swanton off the top of the pod to Umaga for the pin.

Then Shawn superkicks Hardy to give Jericho the pin, only to have HHH Pedigree Shawn to get us down to Hardy vs. HHH. Hardy starts fast with a DDT onto the steel and a backdrop sends HHH back inside. The Swanton misses though and a Pedigree gets….two. Ok that was a surprise. HHH grabs a chair but has to counter a Twist of Fate. That’s enough to set up the Pedigree onto the chair to finish Hardy (and kill the crowd) for the Wrestlemania title shot.

Rating: B+. This was a good bit better than the first one as it had more violence, better action, more plausible winners (Shawn and Jericho weren’t winning, but they were more likely than MVP and Finlay) and a better pace. HHH winning isn’t a surprise, but dang Hardy was over here and that was a pretty bad loss. The fans going quiet after the pin didn’t help, but like HHH wasn’t going to get his big win at some point.

Overall Rating: B. Obviously this show was all about the Chambers and Orton vs. Cena, all of which worked pretty well. There isn’t much on the rest of the show, but you can see a lot of Wrestlemania from here so they got the important stuff right. This wasn’t a show built around a bunch of small stuff but rather three big things, which is quite the shift, especially so soon after the Royal Rumble. You can see Wrestlemania from here though and that is a good thing to see.

 

 

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