Smackdown – April 4, 2008: Get A Move On

Smackdown
Date: April 4, 2008
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole

It’s the first show after Wrestlemania and the big story is the Undertaker defeating Edge in the show’s main event to get the World Title back. You can all but guarantee that won’t be it between the two, as a match like that is primed for rematches. Other than that, we might be seeing some new stars around here, which tends to be the case after Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is La Familia to get things going and none of them look happy. Edge has never been so upset as he felt he left everyone down. Most of all, he feels like he let Vickie Guerrero down but swears on their love that he will get the World Title back. Chavo Guerrero feels like he let La Familia down and says Kane cheated to beat him at Wrestlemania. Vickie, after a rather mild “excuse me”, says Edge and Chavo will get their next title matches at Backlash. As for tonight, their opponents can face each other, as it’s Kane vs. Undertaker.

Matt Hardy vs. MVP

Non-title as the battle rages on. MVP drives him into the corner to start and fires off the shoulders to the ribs. A neckbreaker gets Matt out of trouble and they fight to the floor as Cole recaps this rather long feud. Back in and Matt drops an elbow for two and a clothesline has MVP outside again.

That doesn’t last long this time either as MVP hangs Matt over the ropes for something like a Nightmare On Helm Street to take over. MVP sends him outside in another heap and Matt goes into the announcers’ table to make it worse. We hit the reverse chinlock back inside before MVP goes simple by stomping on Matt’s face.

Back up and Matt goes after the knee (feels like some poetic justice), including wrapping it around the rope in the corner. More cranking ensues on the mat, followed by the Side Effect. The Twist of Fate is broken up but MVP’s knee is too banged up to try the running boot in the corner. Now the Twist of Fate can finish MVP off.

Rating: B-. This was a slower paced match than the two usually have but they both have the skills to have a quality match like this one. MVP almost has to lose the title to Hardy sooner than later as that is entirely the point of picking this feud up after such a long hiatus. Granted it won’t mean as much due to MVP’s consistent losing, but at least they are tying up the loose end.

Festus vs. Zack Ryder

Jesse and Curt Hawkins are here too. Before the match, Hawkins and Ryder didn’t have many nice things to say about Festus. The bell rings so Festus beats both of them up on the floor without much trouble. Back in and Festus beats on him in the corner as commentary talks about Snoop Dogg at Wrestlemania. A bunch of headbutts keep Ryder down but he manages some forearms to the face. The fall away slam sends Ryder flying though and a running knee makes it even worse. Festus grabs the fireman’s carry flapjack for the pin.

Rating: C. This was little more than a squash but Festus can do the power stuff well enough to make it entertaining. If nothing else the flapjack looks like something that could wipe someone out, which is not something every finisher manages to accomplish. I’m a bit surprised that Ryder lost to someone who is little more than half of a comedy team, but maybe the reheating is upon us.

Long video on Ric Flair losing to force his retirement, plus his farewell.

Here is Shawn Michaels to address what he did to Ric Flair. Shawn talks about being face to face with Flair on Raw and feeling his eyes well up with tears. Cue Batista to interrupt though and he isn’t looking happy. Batista says that he isn’t over what happened to Flair yet, because he won’t get to see his friend wrestle again. Shawn says it killed him too but Batista doesn’t want to hear it.

Shawn talks about how Flair wanted his best and Batista would have done it too. Batista says not so fast and says that while Shawn had a job to do, Shawn doesn’t do jobs. If Shawn had laid down JUST ONCE, Flair would still be here. Because Shawn wouldn’t do the right thing, Batista will never ride with his best friend again. Does Shawn really see Flair as Old Yeller? Like some sick old dog? Batista walks away, still making it sound like Flair died.

Undertaker and Kane meet in the back but don’t say anything.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Matt Bentley

Bentley is an OVW mainstay while the debuting Kozlov comes to the ring to no music for a bit of an eerie vibe. Kozlov flips him over to start before firing off some kicks. The boot choke in the corner sets up a headbutt to the chest and a torture rack drop finishes Bentley fast. Total squash and impressive enough while it lasted.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Non-title. Miz drives Yang into the corner to start but misses a clothesline. Moore comes in with a dropkick for one but it’s off to Morrison as there are a disturbing amount of empty seats opposite the hard camera. Morrison finishes fast with the flipping neckbreaker.

Post match Great Khali comes out to wreck everyone. Cue Big Show to say he is getting in Khali’s face instead, with Khali leaving again.

Here are Teddy Long and the owners of Beverly Hills Choppers to announce the winner of the Divas contest. Michelle McCool wins but here is Victoria to interrupt. Victoria says the contest was fixed and the brawl is on, but a mystery woman jumps Michelle from behind. Said mystery woman also knocks Cherry (here for the finals) down as well and leaves with Victoria. No name is given but you might know her better by her name in OVW: Nattie Neidhart.

Long Wrestlemania video.

Kane vs. Undertaker

Non-title. They shove each other around to start so Undertaker goes after the arm. Some arm cranking has Kane down until he powers out, only to have Undertaker take out the leg instead. With that not working, Undertaker switches back to the arm as Coach says they aren’t going as hard as usual due to not wanting to hurt each other.

Kane backs him into the corner for some shots to the face as the pace picks up fast. The slugout actually goes to Kane, who drops him with a big boot. The right hands in the corner just wake Undertaker up and the brawl heads to the floor. Back in and they fight over a chokeslam attempt until stereo big boots put them both down. They both sit up but here is La Familia to jump both of them for the double DQ.

Rating: C. This was little more than a way to have a big main event without having either champion lose. The match was barely a thing as they spent about half of it in slow motion, which did kind of make sense for the story they were telling. Thankfully they didn’t have either of them lose, so they were thinking here, even if the stakes were nonexistent.

Post match Undertaker and Kane fight back, including double chokeslams and Tombstones, to clear the ring and end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. They kept the pace going here and had a few debuts to go with the next steps in the big stories. Other than Batista’s weird way of talking about Ric Flair being gone, there wasn’t much that didn’t work here. While nothing was through the roof, it was a show that felt like it came in with momentum and then moved towards Backlash. Good, efficient show here and a great breath of air after the last few weeks.

 

 

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Smackdown – March 21, 2008: GET ON WITH IT!

Smackdown
Date: March 21, 2008
Location: Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re almost to Wrestlemania and I’m not sure what else there is to build around here. Last week’s main event was a weird combination of a Raw and Smackdown match which felt like a weird off ramp match. Odd are the focus will still be on Edge vs. Undertaker, which really doesn’t need it at this point. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recreation of Batista vs. Umaga in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008. Well that’s a change of pace.

Batista vs. Deuce N Domino

No Cherry this week as she is in the competition later tonight. Batista doesn’t look amused as he drives Deuce into the corner to start. A double team manages to take Batista down but he’s right back with an elbow to Domino’s face. Batista isn’t having that though and sends Deuce outside, setting up the Batista Bomb to finish Domino in a hurry.

Maryse comes up to see Cherry and can’t believe she’s still in the Divas competition. Look at the two of them: Maryse is a Diva but Cherry is a dog.

It’s time for the Divas Competition with Michelle McCool, Eve Torres, Cherry and Victoria left. This week’s competition is an arm wrestling contest so Victoria cheats to beat Eve, Michelle beats Cherry and Michelle beats Victoria. With that out of the way, Victoria is eliminated after last week’s fan vote. Instead of leaving, she gets in a fight with Michelle but gets sent outside.

Video on Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Michael Buffer and Evander Holyfield talk about Mayweather Jr. vs. Big Show.

Big Show vs. Chase Stevens/Andy Douglas/Luke Hawx

Stevens and Douglas were the Naturals in TNA a few years earlier. Before the match, we see Chris Jericho talking about how Show’s right hand is going to make it Wrestlemania RIP for Mayweather. Destruction ensues and the big right hand finishes Stevens in less than a minute and a half.

Raven Symone will be bringing kids to Wrestlemania for Make-A-Wish. Cool.

Edge vs. Funaki

Non-title and the Edgeheads are here with Edge. Funaki seems to be taking this a bit more seriously than Edge, who knocks Funaki down fast. The stomping in the corner keeps Funaki in trouble until he manages an enziguri. Edge hits the spear but pulls Funaki up at two. Instead it’s a Tombstone and arm cross pin (with tongue) to finish for Edge.

Rating: D+. This was just a quick workout for Edge but the Tombstone was a nice touch. Edge knows how to get under people’s skin like no other and mocking Undertaker is the kind of mind game that he would play. Funaki is fine for something like this and they didn’t mess around by letting him get a near fall or anything unnecessary like that. Nothing match, fine use of time.

Post match Edge says he’ll win at Wrestlemania and promises to show us something by the end of the night.

It’s time for MVP’s VIP Lounge with MVP pointing to the Money in the Bank briefcase above the ring. Therefore, his guest this week is Chris Jericho, but first MVP wants to talk about the ladder underneath the briefcase. MVP brags about his career successes and how he has beaten so many World Champions. That means he is the next World Champion because he is better than everyone else in the match. Cue Jericho to interrupt and the fans certainly seem to approve.

Jericho is excited about being back on Smackdown for the first time in five and a half years, but he can’t stand a loudmouthed blowhard who can’t shut up with his own talk show. MVP mocks Jericho and Jericho is right back, pointing out that MVP could have had far worse initials (and yes, he has graphics spelling out some stupid names). That’s too far for MVP, who goes on a rant about how Jericho couldn’t save anyone from anything. He climbs the ladder and gets the briefcase….so Jericho turns said ladder over.

Kane vs. Chuck Palumbo

They fight over the power to start with Palumbo actually taking over off an armbar. Kane fights up and hits the big boot as they head outside. They head back in, where Kane clotheslines him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Kane charging into an elbow in the corner…and here is Great Khali to go after Kane for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Thankfully they didn’t bother trying to make Palumbo a thing here as he stopped showing much potential a good while ago. Kane winning the battle royal and the ECW Title as a result would make good sense and there is a real chance that is where they are heading. Not much of a match, but what were you expecting with Palumbo in there?

Post match Khali beats both of them down but here is Mark Henry to interrupt. Henry World’s Strongest Slams Khali and stands tall.

Eddie Graham Hall of Fame video.

Tag Team Titles: Jesse & Festus vs. Miz/John Morrison

Miz/Morrison are defending. The bell makes Festus snap and he hits Morrison in the face to start fast. An interfering Miz is knocked out of the air and some headbutts to Morrison’s back set up Jesse’s running neckbreaker. Miz gets in a cheap shot though and works on Jesse’s arm before choking on the rope.

Morrison’s chinlock is broken up as Jesse sends him into the corner, where Festus scares Morrison in a funny bit. Miz grabs another chinlock before Jesse neckbreakers his way out of Morrison’s….something. It’s back to Festus for the house cleaning before handing it off to Jesse again. That lets Morrison send Festus outside and the Reality Check retains the titles.

Rating: C-. We’re now to the point where Miz and Morrison have cleaned out the division, which granted doesn’t take that long when there are about four teams. Jesse & Festus need to either win the titles or find something else to do, as the novelty is kind of wearing off. This was mainly a chinlock match with Festus coming in to do his thing and then Jesse gets pinned. That’s only going to get you so far and we have reached that point.

Raw Rebound.

Undertaker vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and Edge/the Edgeheads are here with Chavo. Undertaker starts fast and knocks Chavo down without much trouble. Old School connects and Chavo is rocked early on. A distraction from the floor lets Chavo hammer away in the corner, only to have Undertaker LAUNCH him into said corner as well.

The side slam gives Undertaker two but another distraction sends him outside. This time Chavo manages a baseball slide from behind and the likely not very effective beating begins. Chavo grabs a short armscissors but Undertaker powers out in short order. Snake Eyes into the big boot set up a chokeslam and the Hell’s Gate to finish Chavo.

Rating: C. Chavo has to lose the title at Wrestlemania now as his big win in recent weeks has been over Colin Delaney. Other than giving him a win to make him into something a little bigger, his title reign has been pretty much nothing and that was on display here. Undertaker beating Chavo isn’t a bad thing, but the champ just lost in about five minutes in little more than a squash.

Post match Edge and the Edgeheads come in, each with a chair, and the huge beatdown ensues. The Conchairto leaves Undertaker laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. It’s not a good sign when the best match on the show is Undertaker squashing Chavo Guerrero. The problem is the same as it has been for weeks now: Wrestlemania is set and all that Smackdown can do is fill in time on the way to Orlando. This show was just a bunch of filler with some build towards Wrestlemania, plus the bigger moment at the end. That’s a rough two hours, but none of that is going to matter nine days from now. Not a good show, but it doesn’t mean a thing anyway.

 

 

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Smackdown – March 14, 2008: They’re Veering Off

Smackdown
Date: March 14, 2008
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 15,121
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole

We are less than a month away from Wrestlemania and the focus continues to be on Edge vs. the Undertaker. This time though, Edge is veering off to team with the Edgeheads against Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair in a cage match. That’s certainly a unique enough one to go with so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is hometown girl Maria to get things going. She is excited for Bunnymania but tonight, she is hosting the Smackdown Divas Contest so here are the rest of the women. We waste no time in eliminating Maryse, meaning it’s time for this week’s contest. All four of the remaining women (Eve Torres, Michelle McCool, Cherry, Victoria) run the course….with time not counting, because the fan vote decides who is eliminated anyway. McCool wins as at least this was short.

Ric Flair and Shawn Michaels are ready for the main event.

Raw Rebound.

Big Show vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Show shoves them down without much trouble and tosses Yang into Moore in the corner. The chops rock Moore again and Yang gets tossed so hard that he almost spins around. The big right hand pins Moore in a hurry.

Post match Show tosses Yang ala Floyd Mayweather Jr. on Raw.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: John Morrison vs. The Miz

Morrison doesn’t waste time by grabbing a rollup for a fast two. Back up and Miz hits a middle rope clothesline for one and it’s time for Morrison to bail to the floor. Miz cranks on a headlock before forearming away. That’s fine with Morrison, who sweeps the legs into a jackknife rollup for two more. The flipping neckbreaker is blocked though and Miz faceplants him for two of his own. Morrison isn’t pleased and pops back up with the flipping neckbreaker to finish Miz off.

Rating: C-. Very basic match here and that is about all you could expect from them. Miz isn’t that far along (though he’s coming) and Morrison is the bigger and more successful star. No one would buy Miz as a threat to win the briefcase and while Morrison isn’t that much better of an option, he’s the better option than Miz at the moment.

Video on JBL vs. Finlay, leading to their Belfast Brawl at Wrestlemania.

Finlay joins us via satellite, saying there are no words to describe what it’s like to look at Hornswoggle in his hospital bed. At Wrestlemania, there will be no words to describe the beating he is going to give JBL.

US Title: MVP vs. Batista

MVP is defending and this is no holds barred. They go nose to nose to start until MVP bails to the floor to avoid a charge. Back in and Batista sends him face first into the buckle before a big kick to the chest gets two. An elbow to the head gives Batista two more but MVP is right back up with an overhead belly to belly of all things. MVP gets smart by hitting him in the face with a chain and then chokes away with it back inside.

Batista breaks that up so MVP tears off a buckle pad, only to walk into a spinebuster. It’s too early for Batista to follow up though and MVP gets in a chair shot to the ribs. They go outside with MVP being sent into the barricade and Batista being sent into the post. A low blow gives MVP a needed breather and there’s a running boot to the face as we take a break.

Back with both of them still down on the floor until Batista has to spear a chair out of MVP’s hands. That doesn’t keep MVP down very long though as he chairs Batista in the leg to take over again. MVP takes too long (common theme in this one) peeling back the ring mats though and now it’s Batista getting in his own chair shot. Back in and MVP sends him face first into the exposed buckle to knock Batista silly. For some reason MVP goes up with the chair, allowing Batista to get up. Not that it matters though as cue Umaga to Samoan Spike Batista down, allowing MVP to retain the title.

Rating: C+. This should be it for the feud as Batista now has an even bigger reason to focus on Umaga and Wrestlemania. The ending was the logical way to go as you need to keep Batista strong and MVP…well he’s lost so many times already that it’s hard to believe that there is much left for his reign anyway. What matters here is they wrapped up one feud and moved on to another and at least MVP got a pin for once.

Video on Floyd Mayweather Jr. vs. Big Show.

Kane/Jamie Noble vs. Great Khali/Chuck Palumbo

Palumbo slugs away at Kane to start, which goes about as well as you are probably imagining. Noble, with his bad ribs, comes in and is quickly dropped, allowing Khali to come in and go after the ribs. Some shots to Khali have no effect but Palumbo gets in a cheap shot from the apron anyway. The chokebomb finishes Noble fast.

The cage is lowered.

The Brisco Brothers are going into the Hall Of Fame.

Ric Flair/Shawn Michaels vs. Edge/Edgeheads

In a cage with escape only rules. Hold on though as here is Vickie Guerrero to say we’re adding in someone else. Cue Chavo Guerrero and this is going to be 4-2. We’re joined in progress with the big fight on and Edge spears Flair down to make the numbers game even worse. Shawn gets tied up in the ropes and there’s a spear against the cage or him too.

That leaves him to see an already bloody Flair get rammed into the cage but Shawn is untied and stomped in the corner. Flair manages a few right hands but Edge rakes him face first into the cage. Shawn fights up and Flair does the same, only to have Shawn get tied up in the Tree of Woe for a spear from Edge. Somehow Flair chops away at Edge and the Edgeheads and Shawn manages to knock a diving Chavo out of the air.

A low blow drops Edge and Shawn hits the forearm into the nip up. The villains are sent into the cage over and over and there’s the top rope elbow to Hawkins. Edge spears Chavo by mistake and the double Figure Fours go on. Chavo breaks them up with a double frog splash….and Undertaker is here. Undertaker goes after Edge but a distraction lets him escape the cage for the win.

Rating: C. This was weird as it didn’t really do anything other than put a bunch of people in the cage at once before Undertaker popped in to give them an ending. It felt like they just said “oh do whatever” and moved on, which doesn’t make for the most interesting of matches. That being said, it’s more interesting than a regular tag match and I guess Flair’s loss doesn’t count because he wasn’t directly beaten?

Overall Rating: C. We seem to be entering into the portion of the Wrestlemania build where they have everything set and just need to focus on that instead of anything new. That doesn’t make for the most interesting show, but it’s nice to have a plan and then go forward with it. With only two weeks to go before Wrestlemania, we could be in for some very different shows, but that doesn’t mean they’re all going to be thrilling.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – March 11, 2008: It’s Been A Bit

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: March 11, 2008
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 15,121
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Wrestlemania continues to inch closer and thankfully it seems that Chavo Guerrero can finally move on from CM Punk and find a new challenger for the ECW Title. This week is about the Tag Team Titles though as Tommy Dreamer and Colin Delaney are challenging Miz and John Morrison for the Smackdown Tag Team Titles in an Extreme Rules match. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Tommy Dreamer/Colin Delaney

Miz and Morrison are defending in an Extreme Rules match. Since there are tags in an EXTREME RULES match, Dreamer gets taken into the corner for an early double teaming. Delaney, realizing how rules should really work, dives onto both champs and the fight goes to the floor. A big running flip dive takes Miz and Morrison down as Taz and Cole are way behind Delaney doing nutty things.

Miz manages to knock Dreamer down though and it’s a double gutbuster to Delaney inside. Hold on though as Dreamer slides in a kendo stick and Delaney gets to swing a bit. Dreamer comes back in and the champs are able to get back up with some weapon shots of their own. The catapult into the slingshot elbow crushes Delaney but Dreamer is back with some trashcan lid shots.

With Morrison down, Delaney puts on a Chicago Bears helmet for What’s Up because ECW. Miz is back up with some trashcan lid shots but Dreamer and Delaney tie the champs in the Tree of Woe for running shots to the face. Stereo covers get stereo twos with stereo feet on the ropes, so let’s grab a table.

With that taking too long, Dreamer and Miz go up, with Morrison going over to break it up. That means a superplex to Miz and a superbomb to Morrison for another double delayed near fall. Delaney’s Sliced Bread is broken up with a hard toss out to the floor, allowing Morrison to moonsault off the apron while holding a trashcan. Back in and Miz and Morrison send Dreamer through the table to retain the titles.

Rating: B-. This was WAY better than it had any right to be and it worked out rather well. Delaney and Dreamer were never going to be serious threats to win the titles but they did have some fun on the way there. The helmet spot was fun if nothing else, but this should wrap up the feud for good.

Here is Armando Estrada to announce a 24 man battle royal at Wrestlemania. The winner will get an ECW title match later that night. Estrada brings out one of the participants.

Great Khali vs. Stevie Richards

I’m assuming you can guess which of the two Estrada was excited about. Chokebomb finishes Richards in about 20 seconds.

Post match Mike Knox comes out and wrecks Richards even more. So much for that push.

Deuce vs. Kofi Kingston

Domino and Cherry are here with Deuce. Kofi goes after the arm to start but Deuce snaps the throat across the top rope for a breather. Granted not for Kofi but it’s kind of hard to share one of those. The neck crank goes on but Kofi pops up for the right hands in the corner. The Boom Drop connects and a spinning kick to the face (the Jamaican Buzzsaw according to Joey) finishes Deuce fast.

Rating: C. This is Kingston starting to move up the ladder a bit as Deuce might not be a big star but he is a bigger deal than the other people Kingston has beaten. You can see some potential in him and WWE seems to be moving him in the right way. Nothing special as far as a match goes, but at least he is moving in the right direction.

Raw Rebound.

Wrestlemania rundown.

CM Punk is ready to beat Big Daddy V. and qualify for Money In The Bank. And hey, we’re in his hometown.

Festus vs. Elijah Burke

Jesse is here too. Festus goes off on Burke to start but gets punched back into the corner for his efforts. Burke works on the arm and dropkicks him down for one. Festus shoulders him down, drops a knee, and finishes with the fireman’s carry flapjack. This really wasn’t good and you could see the fans walking out.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Big Daddy V. vs. CM Punk

Shelton Benjamin is on commentary and Matt Striker is here with V. Punk gets shoved down to start so he switches to the leg kicks. V runs him over though as the CM PUNK chants are rather loud here. The slow, plodding offense begins but Punk is back with a running knee in the corner. For some reason, Punk tries the GTS and gets crushed by V landing on his back (a deserved result for being stupid). Back up and Punk knocks him to the floor and that’s a fast countout for the win.

Rating: D+. Yeah what else were you expecting here? There is only so much that anyone can do with V and as a smaller wrestler, Punk is even more limited. Punk winning wasn’t much of a shock here, but what mattered was giving the fans something to cheer about. It was a bad match of course, but they did what they needed to do.

Overall Rating: C. The opener was good but the rest was a mixture of dull and bad. ECW just has nothing going on with Wrestlemania as the title match is going to be set up at the show. What does that leave for the next few weeks as we get to the show? Not a great show here, but at least they set something up going forward.

 

 

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Smackdown – March 7, 2008: Go The Other Way

Smackdown
Date: March 7, 2008
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

Wrestlemania is less than a month away and that means we should be seeing some of the lower level matches starting to come together. Most of the card is already set with Undertaker vs. Edge feeling like a huge match. Other than that we have Batista vs. Umaga in a Raw vs. Smackdown match and Big Show vs. Floyd Mayweather Jr. in a match that could go on either show. We’ll need more than that so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with Vickie Guerrero and Edge, with Teddy Long in the corner, on the Cutting Edge. After praising Vickie, Edge talks about how he has never lost to Undertaker, making him the real Phenom. Vickie makes Edge/the Edgeheads vs. Undertaker for tonight, which Edge finds very hot. With that out of the way, there is someone else who is going to be losing his 35 year career at Wrestlemania.

That brings us to tonight’s guest, so here is Ric Flair. Edge welcomes him to the show but wants to know what it’s going to be like when Flair loses at Wrestlemania. Flair promises to beat Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania but Edge doesn’t exactly sound convinced. Fans: “YOU SUCK!” Flair: “Your fans are talking to her.” Edge asks Flair about losing to the Undertaker at Wrestlemania, which Flair says is something you never forget.

Losing to Undertaker didn’t hurt his career, but he came at it differently. Edge is the one with a sham of a relationship, which sends Vickie into a rant. After calming her down, Edge says Flair needs to watch the handicap match tonight, because he’ll have his own next week. Oh and let’s make that a cage match. Edge WOOs in his face but gets slapped, with Flair bailing from violence.

CM Punk/Jesse & Festus vs. Miz/John Morrison/Chavo Guerrero

That’s quite the good guy team. Festus clears the ring at the bell until we settle down with Miz vs. Punk to start. Miz manages a quick hot shot and brings in Chavo, who gets backdropped just as fast. Jesse comes in for a backdrop and basement dropkick but Morrison shoves him off the top. This has Festus ready to smash but we take a break instead (probably a good idea).

We take a break and come back with Morrison working on Jesse’s arm. That doesn’t last long either as Jesse slips away and hands it off to Festus to clean house. Everything breaks down with Jesse and Punk hitting dives onto Morrison and Chavo. Back in and the fireman’s carry flapjack gives Festus the pin on Miz.

Rating: C. What else were you expecting here? The good thing is that we didn’t have to sit through too much more of Chavo vs. Punk, as that is a match that has been driven into the ground in recent weeks. Other than that, Miz and Morrison get beaten again, even if it is from a team that is little more than a one off idea. Just find some more interesting challengers for both titles. It shouldn’t be that hard.

Jamie Noble is in the back with Michelle McCool and says he knows she has a thing for him. Noble gets it, but he’s a one woman man. She’s ok with it, and seem to have thought the same thing as Noble.

US Title: MVP vs. Batista

MVP is defending. They fight over a lockup to start with Batista powering him outside without much trouble. Back in and Batista knocks him outside again, though this time he follows him out to keep up the beating. They get back in with Batista starting in on the leg for a change, including a half crab. That’s enough for MVP to bail to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Batista hitting a running corner clothesline but MVP kicks the leg out. A running boot to the head, with the bad leg, gives MVP a bit of a desperation two and we hit the chinlock. Another kick to the leg takes Batista back down and a facebuster, on the bad knee, gives MVP a delayed two. It might not sound logical, but commentary is selling the idea that MVP is desperate to fight Batista so it does make some sense.

MVP kicks him out to the floor for another two and we’re off to a leglock to keep Batista down. Back up and MVP misses the running boot in the corner, allowing Batista to come back with the swinging Boss Man Slam for two. The spinebuster crushes MVP, whose low blow is blocked without much effort. They fight outside with Batista keeping up the beating, but MVP kicks him into the announcers’ table and beats the count to win.

Rating: C+. Well, at least MVP didn’t lose again. This screams setup for another match, hopefully where MVP can retain the title by pinning Batista, likely through some kind of shenanigans. These two got some time here and it was a decent match, though Batista in the US Title scene feels so out of place and it’s hard to fathom in a lot of ways.

We look at Hornswoggle being beaten down again.

Jamie Noble interrupts Edge and Vickie Guerrero, saying he wants a match with Chuck Palumbo. Vickie is annoyed so she gives him Big Show instead.

Mae Young Hall Of Fame video.

Kim Kardashian will be the guest hostess at Wrestlemania.

And now, a Divas swimsuit contest, featuring Eve Torres, Cherry, Maryse, Michelle McCool and Victoria. Apparently this is the first week of a four week competition to determine the Top Diva on Smackdown with one woman being eliminated each week. Not only will the winner get bragging rights but they will also win a….custom motorcycle? They all disrobe (Cherry looks nervous and Victoria dances badly) and we get the results next week because this is another Diva Search style contest. Oh and a fight breaks out because of course it does.

Video on Rey Mysterio being injured and having to undergo bicep surgery.

Kane vs. Chuck Palumbo

Kane powers him into the corner to start but Palumbo is back with some right hands of his own. A clothesline gives Palumbo two but Kane grabs the side slam. Palumbo tries to headbutt his way out of the chokeslam, only to get chokeslammed for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. Palumbo was trying here but we are way beyond the point of him meaning anything. The feud with Jamie Noble worked for a little while and then just went on for so much longer than it needed to that it killed any momentum. Kane is getting back on a roll and there is no reason to have him be in any major threat from Palumbo here.

Big Show vs. Jamie Noble

Show throws him into the corner and gets kicked low for the DQ in short order.

Show shrugs it off and chops Noble down before promising to end Floyd Mayweather Jr.’s career at Wrestlemania.

Raw Rebound.

Undertaker vs. Edge/Edgeheads

Undertaker beats up Hawkins to start and throws him into the corner, allowing Ryder to come in and get beaten down as well. Edge certainly seems nervous as Undertaker kicks Ryder in the head. A cheap shot cuts Undertaker off though and Edge gets to hammer away for a bit. The Edgeheads take turns splashing Undertaker but Edge’s swinging neckbreaker is countered into a DDT. Old School is loaded up but a distraction means that it has to be switched into a top rope armdrag (ok then). The Edgeheads distract Undertaker again though and Edge hits the spear for the pin.

Rating: C-. It was quick and to the point here but at least Edge finally got something over on Undertaker. You can only have Undertaker beat him up every week for so long before it stops having any real impact. There is almost no way that Undertaker is leaving Wrestlemania without the title, but at least they are putting on a good story on the way there.

Edge and Undertaker glare at each other to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. They were going up and down this week and that wasn’t the most thrilling show. Undertaker vs. Edge is good and Batista vs. MVP, while not a long term story, is doing well enough, but stuff like the women fighting over a motorcycle isn’t exactly thrilling. Get rid of some of the lame parts and the better portions can take over.

 

 

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Smackdown – February 29, 2008: When Great Khali Has Match Of The Night

Smackdown
Date: February 29, 2008
Location: Convention Center, Tuscon, Arizona
Attendance: 5,200
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We are just over a month away from Wrestlemania XXIV and most of the top of the card is set. That means that the following weeks can be for a mixture of firming up the main events and building up the lower half of the card. That can include quite a few things and we’ll start this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look at the Wrestlemania press conference.

Opening sequence.

Big Show vs. Joey Ryans/Jay Garland

Ryans is….well I think you can guess and this is Show’s first WWE match in over a year. We hear about Show wanting to be a boxer but not being able to get anyone to take his fights. Garland gets chokeslammed and Ryans gets punched in the corner. A right hand knocks Ryans silly for the easy pin.

Post match Show talks about how Floyd Mayweather Jr. may be facing Oscar de la Hoya in September. It’s just a rumor, and Show is here to stop that rumor. Show is going to break everything in Mayweather, including his spirit. There isn’t going to be a Mayweather vs. de la Hoya fight, but Show vs. de la Hoya is possible. That $20 million that Mayweather is getting for the Wrestlemania match (right) isn’t going to be enough for the pain he’ll be experiencing.

Deuce N Domino vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino. Yang and Domino get things going with Domino missing an elbow drop so Yang can grab a headlock. Moore comes in and gets hit in the face a few times before headscissoring Domino into the corner. Back up and Domino sends Moore HARD out to the floor (that was a scary landing), setting up something like a seated abdominal stretch back inside.

Commentary argues about old westerns and whether Asians can be rednecks (oh dear) as Domino pulls Moore down by the hair and knocks Yang off the apron. Not that it matters as the hot tag goes through a few seconds later, with Yang getting to clean a few rooms. The moonsault press misses though and Cherry pulls Moore off the apron. That leaves Yang to slip out of a belly to back suplex and now the moonsault press can connect for the pin on Deuce.

Rating: C. I’m glad to see Yang and Moore sticking around a bit longer, as they have been a rather nice little bright spot between here and ECW. I’m not sure what that is going to mean for them in the long term, but at least they are doing something for the time being. Deuce N Domino….yeah how long were you expecting a greaser gimmick to last? Maybe having them actually do something as champions might have helped.

Edge and Vickie Guerrero make honeymoon plans, with Edge thinking Canada. Vickie loves Canadians but the Edgeheads interrupt their romance. That’s ok with Edge, who sends Zack Ryder after Undertaker tonight.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Jamie Noble

Yes, AGAIN and Michelle McCool is here with Noble. Palumbo misses a charge into the corner and Noble strikes away before pulling on an armbar over the ropes. Back up and Palumbo dumps him to the floor without much effort but a McCool distraction breaks up whatever Palumbo has planned (probably some kind of wrestling move).

They head back inside with Palumbo hitting an overhead belly to belly superplex for two, leaving Palumbo stunned. Noble manages a Fujiwara armbar until the rope is grabbed, allowing Palumbo to hit a hard slam. An enziguri sends Palumbo into the corner for a Cannonball but he rakes Noble’s eyes across the top. The Overdrive finishes Noble off.

Rating: C. The more I watch these matches the more I believe WWE has just forgotten where they were going with the story but keep it going for lack of anything better for the two of them. Palumbo is still his old, not that interesting self and now Noble, who has been the good guy in the whole thing, is a loser. What else is there for these two to do? And it isn’t like McCool has gained anything either, making this quite the waste of time.

Vickie Guerrero is in the back with Teddy Long and Maryse, with the latter praising Vickie until Batista comes in. Batista has heard about this Raw vs. Smackdown challenge and wants to face Umaga. Maryse likes the idea (and maybe Batista) so Vickie sets the match.

Batista/Kane vs. MVP/Great Khali

Feels like they pressed the random button in Smackdown vs. Raw. Kane and Khali start things off with Khali pounding him into the corner. MVP comes in and gets backdropped, setting up the basement dropkick, which always feels weird from Kane. It’s off to Batista, who charges into an elbow in the corner.

Kane is right back in to big boot MVP down for two as commentary thinks we’ll be talking about the recent Elimination Chamber match for years to come. I wouldn’t get my hopes up on that one. The spinebuster plants MVP but Khali breaks up the Batista Bomb as we take an early break.

Back with Khali shoving Batista down and sending him outside without much trouble. Khali runs him over again back inside and actually covers for two, showing more mobility than usual. Batista gets over for the tag off to Kane to fire off on Khali in the corner. This lasts all of five seconds before Khali knocks him backwards. MVP comes in so Kane grabs him by the throat, earning a chop from Khali on the apron (makes sense).

The cravate doesn’t hold Kane down for very long as he powers up and slams MVP down for a breather. MVP cuts him off with a kick to the head though as this heat is getting some time. Kane finally knocks MVP down though and the hot tag brings in Batista to clean house. Everything breaks down and Khali chops Batista right back down, only to have the Vice Grip reversed into the spinebuster. MVP makes the save so Batista spears Khali down for the pin.

Rating: B-. This was a near shockingly good match as they worked the formula and got some time, making it into a match where I wanted to see how it ended. What mattered the most here though was MVP didn’t take the fall, which had me worried throughout. Khali has nothing going on at the moment and thankfully WWE realized he should be taking the pin.

Eve Torres comes out to introduce High Chief Peter Maivia and Rocky Johnson for the Hall of Fame, with the Rock inducting them. I get that she has to do something, but the Hall of Fame announcement (even one repeated from Raw) doesn’t feel exactly right for someone who has been around for all of a few months.

Jesse & Festus vs. Miz/John Morrison

Non-title but before the match, we get a clip from the Dirt Sheet with a completely genuine conversation between the teams, which makes Jesse & Festus sound a bit dumb. The bell rings and Festus jumps Miz and Morrison before sending the former into the corner for a running shot to the face.

A headbutt lets Jesse come in with a middle rope elbow and even knock Morrison off the apron. Miz gets smart by taking a breather on the floor and Jesse gets taken down back inside. That lasts all of a few seconds as an easy escape sets up the hot tag to Festus. House is cleaned and Festus sits on Morrison’s chest and grabs the fireman’s carry flapjack for the pin.

Rating: C. The champs lose again (after losing on ECW to Tommy Dreamer and Colin Delaney), which is far too common of a trope in WWE. At least Jesse and Festus are a bit better team, but it isn’t like they’re the next great thing. Other than the good looking flapjack, there wasn’t much to be seen here, especially after that rather awesome…Khali match?

Raw Rebound.

Big Daddy V vs. Balls Mahoney

Matt Striker is here with V. Mahoney gets beaten down to start and there’s the swinging Boss Man Slam. The corner splash and Samoan drop crush Mahoney….and there’s the Undertaker’s gong. The lights go out and Undertaker POWER WALKS to the ring (egads) to beat V outside. Mahoney gets chokeslammed too as it’s a no contest because DQ’s are passe or something.

Post match Undertaker says death waits for no man, so Edge needs to send his minion to Undertaker’s yard.

Undertaker vs. Zack Ryder

Edge and Curt Hawkins are here too. Ryder bails to the floor to start and a distraction lets him get in a few cheap shots. That earns Ryder a hard posting and there’s the kick to the side of the head. The beating continues back inside before Undertaker throws him over the top in a heap. Ryder tries to come in off the top but Hawkins has to save him from a chokeslam. Some right hands in the corner just annoy Undertaker so he throws Ryder into the corner to hammer away. Snake Eyes into the big boot set up the chokeslam and choke, which is enough to draw Edge in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. More or less a squash here for Undertaker and that’s all it needed to be. A heel like Edge has minions for a reason and Undertaker got to wreck one of them on the way to Wrestlemania. Ryder is nowhere near ready to be a challenge to Undertaker so this went as it should have gone. It doesn’t make it interesting, but it was logical.

Post match Undertaker is having none of this and beats up the Edgeheads, including the choke to Hawkins. Undertaker holds up the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Undertaker vs. Edge is starting to feel like a big deal and that is how a major Wrestlemania match should come off. The match got another hard push here and when you add in….Great Khali having the match of the night…..it was a pretty decent show. They need something else to build up aside from Edge vs. Undertaker, but they still have a few weeks to make that work.

 

 

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Smackdown – February 22, 2008: Fix The Monster Problem

Smackdown
Date: February 22, 2008
Location: Sports Arena, San Diego, California
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re done with No Way Out and Edge is still the World Champion, meaning he is set to defend the title against the Undertaker at Wrestlemania. That could be in for a long build and the question now is what else will be on the Wrestlemania card. They have some work to do to get it ready so let’s get to it.

Here is No Way Out if you need a recap.

We look at Undertaker winning the Elimination Chamber to become #1 contender.

Opening sequence.

Here are Edge and the Edgeheads to get things going. Edge brags about retaining the World Title at No Way Out because the three of them hurt Rey Mysterio last week in Chile. Now he is on to Wrestlemania to face the Undertaker at Wrestlemania, where Edge wants to cement his legacy by ending the Streak. Edge has his own Wrestlemania undefeated streak and something has to give. He goes against the impossible and succeeds, which is why he will succeed.

For fifteen years, everyone has asked who will finally defeat the Undertaker (eh, more like the last seven or eight) and he will not fall. This year it all ends because he is that man. Then the gong strikes and here is Undertaker to beat up the Edgeheads, who offer enough of a distraction for Edge to escape. Perfectly fine first segment for the feud.

Money In The Bank Qualifying Match: Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Shelton powers him into the corner to start and drives some shoulders to the ribs. Yang fights out, only to get buckle bombed HARD into the corner. The chinlock goes on for a bit before a t-bone suplex cuts off Yang’s comeback. A backbreaker keeps Yang in trouble before Benjamin puts him up top. Yang shoves him away, only to have Benjamin jump up to the top for an overhead belly to belly superplex.

Another buckle bomb is countered with a hurricanrana and a spinning headscissors drops Benjamin again. The running spinwheel kick in the corner sets up a high crossbody for two on Benjamin, followed by a sunset flip out of the corner for the same. That’s enough for Benjamin, who avoids the moonsault press and hits the jumping Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: C. Yang is a good example of someone who has been built up well enough to be a bit of a headache for Benjamin. There was no way Yang was going to get in a match like Money In The Bank, but at least they didn’t have the match be total dominance. This was a completely watchable match and that’s more than I was expecting.

Teddy Long runs into the returning Maryse, who says she hasn’t been around for a long time. She would like to ask him something….in his office.

Jesse And Festus vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino. Festus headbutts Deuce down to start and it’s off to Jesse for a drop toehold. Jesse sends him outside but a Cherry distraction lets Domino get in a cheap shot. We hit the chinlock back inside (with Jesse looking like he is tapping) before Jesse is draped over the top for a forearm to the back from Domino. Back up and Festus adds a headbutt from the apron, allowing Jesse to hit his own headbutt. That’s enough for the hot tag to Festus so house can be cleaned in a hurry. A Rocket Launcher finishes Domino.

Rating: C. Festus is a fun act, but you can only get so much out of the idea of Jesse does a regular match and then tags Festus to wreck things. That doesn’t have the longest shelf life and it is already starting to lose steam. Festus has something with the idea, but there is only so much that can be done with what is basically a one man team.

Raw Rebound.

Video on the South American tour.

Big Daddy V. vs. Shannon Moore

Matt Striker is here with V. Moore gets shoved down to start and his kicks just annoy V a bit more. The swinging Boss Man Slam plants Moore and V sends him flying again. A missed charge lets Moore kick away a few times until V runs him own. The really big elbow finishes Moore off.

Rating: D+. If WWE insists on pushing V as the monster over and over, he needs a win like this every so often. This was almost a total squash and Moore probably got in more than he should have. Moore getting crushed isn’t a bad thing, but V has lost so much that it has me wondering how many more times they can keep reheating him.

MVP vs. Batista

Non-title. During his entrance, we get an inset promo from MVP, saying Batista can’t beat him twice in a row. Batista drives him into the corner to start before going with a boot into MVP’s banged up back. MVP manages to send him face first into the buckle though and a forearm to the back of the head drops Batista for a change.

The running big boot to the side of the head knocks Batista off the apron and MVP hammers away back inside. We hit the chinlock so Batista fights up, only to get sent right back to the floor in a bit of a surprise. The front facelock goes on back inside, setting up a facebuster for two on Batista. That doesn’t last long though as Batista is back with three straight spinebusters and the Batista Bomb finishes fast.

Rating: C. Oh yeah MVP is in that bad place, as he is losing over and over again while still US Champion. In other words, WWE seems to think that he is bulletproof and that means he is going to lose more and more. Why Batista needed to beat him again isn’t the most clear concept, but I would bet on a reaction of “oh well” as they move on.

We get a medical update on Hornswoggle after he got beaten down so badly on Raw. Naturally we see the beatdown, which commentary describes as so horrible.

Great Khali vs. Kane

Kane slugs away to start and gets hit in the face for his efforts. Khali gets knocked back into the corner but a clothesline of his own puts Kane back down. The slugout continues with Kane hitting an uppercut but getting caught going up top. We hit the nerve hold and then the Vice Grip but Kane kicks off the corner and falls backwards for the pin.

Rating: D. It was a bunch of punches and chops before the fluke ending to keep Khali looking strong. Kane was trying here but what exactly is he supposed to do in a situation like this? Khali continues to be so limited in the ring, but much like Big Daddy V, it stops meaning anything when he loses over and over again.

Video on the Streak.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Matt Jackson

Yes that Matt Jackson and Palumbo runs him over with a clothesline to start. Jackson hits a dropkick as Michelle McCool is watching in the back. Palumbo knocks him to the floor for a fall away slam, followed by a clothesline back inside. The Full Throttle finishes Jackson fast.

Here is Rey Mysterio for an update on his health. Rey gets right to the point: he has a torn bicep and needs surgery. Unfortunately the surgery will take place this weekend, so he won’t be at Wrestlemania. If this is the last time that he is going to be in the ring for a long time, there is no better place to be than in San Diego.

Cue Vickie Guerrero to say she doesn’t care if Rey is hurt because he ruined her moment last week. We see Rey “accidentally” hitting Vickie with a springboard seated senton last week and Rey still isn’t very sorry. Vickie doesn’t want to hear it, but Rey has a match RIGHT NOW, injury or not.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title. Chavo charges at him to start and hammers away with Rey falling around the ring. Rey manages a hurricanrana but gets faceplanted to cut that off in a hurry. We take a break and come back with Chavo working on the arm. Rey even has to go to the ropes to escape, leaving Chavo to baseball slide him to the floor. Back in and Rey manages another headscissors, setting up the running seated senton off the apron.

Chavo catches Rey up top back inside, only to get knocked down to set up a top rope seated senton. The basement dropkick gets two more and the 619 has Chavo down. Rey’s arm won’t let him hit the springboard though, allowing Chavo to catch him on top. Three Amigos have Rey in trouble but he avoids the frog splash, allowing Rey to come back with a sunset flip for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. Given Rey’s injury, this went about as well as it could have gone. That being said, it doesn’t say much when Chavo, the reigning ECW Champion, knew this was coming and was healthy but still lost anyway. WWE already hasn’t exactly made ECW look good and now it is even worse with this latest development as Rey is on the way out.

Post match Vickie says it’s her turn to hurt Rey….so here is Big Show to lay Rey out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Edge vs. Undertaker is going to be fine but they didn’t exactly do anything to start another feud here. Rey was written off due to his injury for the sake of crushing him in his hometown, but we knew he was already heading off for surgery. Throw in a bunch of pretty ok at best matches and there just wasn’t much worth seeing as we start the Road To Wrestlemania.

 

 

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Smackdown – February 8, 2008: Vickiekins

Smackdown
Date: February 8, 2008
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole

We are getting close to No Way Out and the Smackdown Elimination Chamber match. That should be enough to carry the show, though there is also a Royal Rumble rematch between Edge and Rey Mysterio for the Smackdown World Title. Tonight is likely going to be about building towards those matches so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Michael Cole brings out Batista for a chat to start. Batista says his experience in the Chamber is his strength because he knows what it is like. There is going to be a ton of monsters in that Chamber but here is MVP to interrupt. MVP says Batista has never been in the Chamber with him but Batista promises violence, especially for what MVP did to Ric Flair. Now it’s Big Daddy V, with Matt Striker, to interrupt.

V feels differently about who is going to win the Chamber with Striker promising violence. Yeah yeah V is big and heavy in case you didn’t get the idea. Then Great Khali, with Runjin Singh, comes out with the latter saying Khali will win. Then Finlay, with Hornswoggle, comes in to say he’s here to fight. Then Undertaker pops up and the good guys clear the ring, likely setting up a six man tag. As soon as MVP came out, you knew what the next eight or so minutes was going to be, especially if you watched Raw where they did the same thing.

Wrestlemania is coming.

Kane vs. Shelton Benjamin

Rematch from ECW where Kane won by countout. Before the match, Shelton says there ain’t no stopping him now. Kane hammers him down in the corner and hits a basement dropkick to keep Benjamin in trouble. A missed charge sends Kane into the corner though and Benjamin hits a Blockbuster for a delayed one.

The chinlock doesn’t last long as Kane is back up with some shots to the face to start the comeback. The top rope clothesline sends Benjamin outside where Kane gets posted. They head up to the apron with Shelton going up top. Kane uppercuts him back to the mat….and doesn’t beat the count to give Shelton the win.

Rating: C. That’s definitely a creative ending but it came after a pretty standard match. Kane vs. Benjamin sounded like a match that should have been rather good but for some reason neither of their tries have gone very far. It also doesn’t help that they don’t have much going on at the moment so they’re just matches for the sake of filling in time on various shows.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Jamie Noble

Yes, again, but this time Michelle McCool is here with Jamie. Palumbo kicks him in the face to start and hammers away, only to miss a top rope elbow. Noble knocks him outside but Michelle isn’t sure about having Noble stomp away. A dropkick knocks Palumbo off the apron again but sends a diving Noble into the motorcycle (OUCH). Back in and Full Throttle finishes Noble.

Rating: C-. That crash onto the motorcycle looked good but my goodness it is hard to care about this story in any other way. Palumbo just isn’t that interested but Noble continues to do everything he can to make this work. They need to move on though, as this match has been done to death already.

Post match Palumbo destroys Noble even more, with commentary getting into their serious voices over the brutality. Palumbo even teases running a downed over with his motorcycle as this segment goes on FAR longer than a Chuck Palumbo and Jamie Noble segment needed to last.

WWE has an office in Shanghai!

Jesse and Festus vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here too. This is the new improved Festus, who comes to the ring with a bag over his head. The bag comes off and Festus looks the same, only to go nuts as usual when the bell rings. Deuce N Domino are cleared out but Deuce comes back in to get armdragged by Jesse. Festus keeps rocking back and forth on the apron as Jesse misses a charge in the corner to put him in trouble for a change. A distraction brings Festus in so the chinlock can go on, only to be broken up just as quickly. The hot tag brings in Festus to clean house and a pump kick into a splash knocks Domino silly. The fireman’s carry flapjack gives Festus the pin.

Rating: C. So yeah it’s the same Jesse and Festus, meaning they’re fun for a bit before before you realize how little Jesse brings to the team. Festus did his thing well enough and is great as a wrecking ball, but the charm wears off soon. Kind of like anything involving Deuce N Domino mattering, as they have completely collapsed after a great start.

Here is Edge for the Cutting Edge. He doesn’t want to do it, but he shows us a clip from the Royal Rumble where Vickie Guerrero was taken out by an errant 619. That brings out Vickie, with Teddy Long at her side, as this week’s guest. After the EDDIE chants die down, Edge sends Teddy to the back so he can be alone with his “Vickiekins.”

Edge knows that next week is Valentine’s Day and Edge has a special question to ask her. That’s next week though, but for now, Rey Mysterio needs to come out here and apologize right now. Cue Rey, who tries to explain but gets slapped by Vickie. Berating ensues, followed by Edge beating Rey down. Rey is ready for the Conchairto though and hits a quick 619 to send Edge bailing. With Rey and Vickie alone, Rey apologizes to her. Fine enough segment with the challenger standing…well not quite tall but close enough.

No Way Out rundown.

Raw Rebound.

Edge won’t say what he is asking Vickie next week.

Edgeheads vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Yang dropkicks Ryder down to start but it’s quickly off to Hawkins for a forearm to the chest. The villains start taking turns working on Yang’s arm but he gets a boot up in the corner to cut off a charging Hawkins. Moore comes in for a quick legdrop on Ryder, who is right back up with a reverse inverted DDT for the pin.

Rating: D+. This is a match that never had a chance to go anywhere and it seems that Yang and Moore’s completely out of nowhere run is finished. They were a fun enough team, who had no chance to actually do anything because the tag division is that weak. Hawkins and Ryder work well together though and it makes sense to give them a win like this to establish them as something more serious than just Edge’s goons.

Great Khali/MVP/Big Daddy V vs. Batista/Finlay/Undertaker

Matt Striker, Runjin Singh and Hornswoggle are here too. We’re joined in progress with Khali hammering on Finlay before MVP comes in to do the same. Finlay fights out of trouble and hands it off to Batista to start on the arm. V comes in and misses the huge charge into the corner, allowing Batista to hit the shoulders in the corner. Undertaker gets to come in and unload with right hands and headbutts before cranking the arm around the top.

Old School is broken up but the second attempt works just fine. An MVP distraction lets V drop Undertaker with a clothesline though and we take a break. Back with MVP hammering on Undertaker but Batista comes in for a suplex. Finlay gets a chance to stomp on MVP, who manages to send him over the top and outside. Everything breaks down and Undertaker grabs a chair, which can’t possibly end well.

We settle down to Khali coming in and stomping on Finlay before stopping to pose. For once that isn’t a bad idea as it’s off to V for a rather easy slam. MVP’s chinlock doesn’t last long and he misses the running boot in the corner, allowing the tag off to Undertaker. Snake Eyes into the big boot (that’s always smooth) gets two and everything breaks down. The parade of secondary finishes sets up Undertaker’s chokeslam to MVP as the match is thrown out.

Rating: C+. Well good for them for not having Undertaker pin MVP, the US Champion. The result was pretty definitive but they didn’t have someone take an unnecessary fall. It’s almost like WWE was thinking about this for a change. Anyway, you know that the Chamber has two possible winners so the match is going to be a lot of filler before the finish, but at least they did something smart here.

Post match Undertaker, Finlay and Batista stare each other down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. We are firmly at the point where No Way Out is set and there isn’t much left to do. WWE has done a decent enough job with half of pay per view that isn’t so interesting so this was about as good as they can do. Hopefully they can come up with something good for next week, because that could be quite the lame show. For now though, this was just barely ok enough, but there is nothing you need to see.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – February 1, 2008: They Made It Worse

Smackdown
Date: February 1, 2008
Location: Sovereign Center, Reading, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and Edge is still the World Champion. Other than that, John Cena from Raw won the Royal Rumble so that means Edge is going to need another challenger for the title at Wrestlemania. That is what No Way Out, in just over two weeks, is for so let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

Teddy Long is in the ring to start and since Vickie Guerrero was injured at the Royal Rumble, Vince McMahon has put him in charge tonight! Teddy throws us to a video on the Edge vs. Rey Mysterio title match on Sunday, with Rey hitting the 619 to Vickie, who jumped out of the wheelchair to save Edge.

That was enough to help Vickie retain the title so Teddy announces a #1 contenders match at No Way Out: the ELIMINATION CHAMBER (the second at No Way Out) so we see a video on the match’s history. The participants are Batista, Great Khali, Finlay, MVP, Big Daddy V and Undertaker. That’s not it though, as Teddy makes Edge vs. Rey Mysterio II for No Way Out. Cue Edge to protest, saying that he’ll fight ANYONE but Mysterio. Teddy doesn’t really care what happened to Vickie, so the match is still on.

MVP vs. Ric Flair

Again non-title and again Flair’s career is on the line. MVP charges into a hiptoss to start and the quick form strut is on. That’s enough to start some frustration, setting off the exchange of strikes in the corner. A running kick to the head drops Flair for two and it’s time to start in on the arm.

Flair gets caught in a backslide for two so the annoyed MVP suplexes him over for the same. Back up and Flair starts in on the leg as he is known to do but it’s too early for the Figure Four. Another attempt works but MVP turns it over IMMEDIATELY, sending them into the ropes. MVP refuses to break the hold though and that’s a DQ.

Rating: C. I was only so into the first match at the Royal Rumble and then this one was only so much better. That being said, it’s better to do this than to give Flair the title as there is no reason to keep having MVP get beaten over and over. Then again the ending would suggest the feud is continuing, even though MVP is off to the Chamber and Flair is ready for Mr. Kennedy. Either way, nothing but a basic match here.

Post match MVP stays on the leg and crushes it with the steps.

Post break, Flair’s leg is in trouble.

Here is Chuck Palumbo for a chat. Palumbo blames what happened to Michelle McCool last week on Jamie Noble, who got in the way and deserved that beating. We look at the clip of Michelle getting taken out, which Palumbo again calls an accident. Palumbo has been fined $10,000 but it was worth it to see Noble get taken out. As for Michelle, Palumbo wants to apologize to her in person. Cue Michelle, who doesn’t buy what Palumbo is saying and isn’t accepting the apology. She slaps him in the face so Palumbo blames her for all of his recent losses. Now he is going to beat up Noble and Michelle has to watch.

Rey Mysterio/CM Punk vs. Edge/Chavo Guerrero

Chavo takes Rey down to start but Rey is right back up with some flips into an armbar. It’s off to Edge, who misses a shot to Punk in the corner and gets headlock takeovered. That’s broken up so it’s back to Chavo, who avoids a running knee to send Punk outside. We take a break and come back with Edge faceplanting Punk and handing it back to Chavo for the abdominal stretch.

Punk fights out and enziguris his way to freedom, allowing the hot tag back to Rey. That means a high crossbody to drop Edge for two but a Chavo distraction lets Edge get in a cheap shot. A big boot gives Edge two but Rey hurricanranas Chavo down. The second hot tag brings in Rey and everything breaks down. The 619 hits Chavo and Rey dives onto Edge outside. That leaves Punk to GTS Chavo for the pin for quite the nice reaction from the crowd.

Rating: B-. They had the time here and the talent was certainly there so this was quite the fun match. Smackdown has a history of putting people out there and letting them have matches like this and that is quite the feature of any wrestling show. Rey was flying well and the fans wanted to see Punk get a big win. Good stuff.

Vince McMahon yells at Finlay for helping Hornswoggle and costing himself a chance at the Royal Rumble. Finlay calls it loyalty, which Vince says doesn’t exist so what Finlay did was stupid.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino. Finlay and Domino start things off but we pause for Hornswoggle to go after Cherry. That earns Cherry a trip to the floor and Finlay beats up Domino. The Celtic Cross sets up the Tadpole splash for the fast pin. Little more than a squash with the Cherry stuff thrown in.

Dancing ensues post match.

Raw Rebound.

New interviewer Eve Torres brings out Batista for a chat. After calling Smackdown the biggest sports entertainment show in the world (Batista: “Yeah I said it.”), Batista says he came up short in the Royal Rumble. Now it is off to the Elimination Chamber though and he is the only entrant who has been in it before. Five men are eliminated and he won’t be one of them because he is going to Wrestlemania. End of another short Batista interview, which I’m kind of digging.

Jesse talks about how Festus has gotten some medical help and they’ll be back next week! Uh, great.

Edgeheads vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Hawkins and Yang lock up to start with Hawkins being very pleased by an armdrag. Yang gets taken into the corner for some chopping and it’s Ryder coming in for a neck crank. The front facelock keeps Yang in trouble, at least until he backdrops his way to freedom. Ryder takes Moore out though, meaning Hawkins can come back in with a cravate to keep Yang down. Yang finally fights out of trouble and gets over to Moore for the hot tag as everything breaks down. Yang dives onto Ryder on the floor but Moore misses a Whisper In The Wind. That’s enough for Hawkins to hit a reverse implant DDT for the pin.

Rating: C. This felt a bit longer than it was and unfortunately it seems to be the end of the line for Moore and Yang as a team that mattered. Then again, I’m not sure how much value they really had when they already lost their Tag Team Title shot, but it was nice to see a team thrown together to give them something to do. Try that more often and see what you might find.

Brothers of Destruction vs. Mark Henry/Big Daddy V

Matt Striker is here with the villains. We’re joined in progress with Kane working over Henry’s leg in the corner before Kane goes up. The top rope clothesline is….almost caught but Kane turns it into a high crossbody, allowing the tag off to Undertaker. The driving shoulders have Henry rocked so it’s back to Kane. A Striker distraction lets Henry hit a running splash in the corner though and V comes in for the chops.

Kane gets over for the tag to Undertaker, who gets clotheslined down in a hurry. The slow power offense continues, including V hitting a running splash in the corner. Henry grabs a bearhug but Kane fights out of it and brings Undertaker back in to clean house. The running DDT hits Henry and it’s a double chokeslam to V. Undertaker chokeslams Henry and puts on the still to be named choke for the win.

Rating: D. A few weeks ago, we saw Undertaker beat Henry and V in a handicap match in about five minutes. Why in the world did the Brothers need almost fifteen minutes to beat them here? It didn’t help that there is only so much that you can get from Henry and V’s slow, plodding offense and it got old fast. Seeing Undertaker and Kane together is cool, but my goodness this was a dull match that lost me fast.

Overall Rating: C-. They flew threw the build to the Chamber here, which is one of the perks of having such a match. All you have to do is announce the participants and what they’re fighting for and everything is set. Throw in Edge vs. Rey II and the important parts of the Smackdown side of the card is ready. Kind of a weak show with a dreadful main event, but it got some stuff done for the pay per view.

 

 

 

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Smackdown – January 18, 2008: He Talks?

Smackdown
Date: January 18, 2008
Location: Birmingham Jefferson Convention Complex, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We are less than two weeks away from the Royal Rumble and odds are we are going to get some focus on that show this week. With Edge vs. Rey Mysterio for the Smackdown World Title all set up, it is time to build on the rest of the card, which is mainly going to focus on the Royal Rumble itself. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the end of last year’s Royal Rumble, with Undertaker beating Shawn Michaels in a classic final five minutes.

Here is Undertaker to get thing going. Undertaker says it is not often that he has a microphone in his hand because he doesn’t have much to say. He doesn’t talk about taking souls because he just does it. In nine days, he is entering the Royal Rumble, which he won last year. This is a warning to the other 29 men: if you stand before him, you will fall before him and Rest In Peace. Cue Matt Striker and Big Daddy V, because this is still a feud they’re trying to push. Undertaker stares V down and the fight is on, with V being sent into the steps. That’s enough for Striker to get him out of here after another nothing brawl between them.

We recap the issues between Rey Mysterio, Vickie Guerrero, Chavo Guerrero and Edge. As tends to be the case, this resulted in Rey being beaten down to end the show.

Finlay vs. Great Khali

Hornswoggle and Runjin Singh are here and get in a chase on the floor at the bell. We take a break less than thirty seconds in and come back with Khali stomping Finlay down in the corner. A right hand drops Finlay again and they head outside until Khali misses a chop. Finlay kicks away but Finlay gets chopped right back.

We hit the nerve hold (of course) before Khali hits a slam to keep Finlay in trouble. Hornswoggle offers a distraction though and Finlay gets in a low blow but it’s time to beat up Singh. That’s enough of a distraction for Khali to hit the chokebomb and the Vice Grip finishes Finlay off.

Rating: D+. You know what you’re going to get from Khali and you know what you’re going to get from this match as it has already happened more than once. The good thing is that they gave Khali a win to get some of his momentum back. You can only have him taken out by the shillelagh so many times before it stops mattering so this was the right way to go. It wasn’t a good match of course, but it did its job.

Edge tells Vickie Guerrero that he will always be here for her. They mean everything they have said to each other, with Vickie suggesting they have a kid. The camera pans over to Teddy Long, who reminds them that he’s still here. Vickie sends him on a food run but Chavo Guerrero interrupts to say he was wrong about the two of them. Chavo says Edge is a good guy and Vickie takes both of their hands.

Raw Rebound.

Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here with the entrance-less Deuce N Domino. Jimmy and Deuce start things off with Jimmy taking him to the mat without much effort. Cherry offers a distraction so Jimmy can be sent outside and it’s Moore coming in, only to be taken down in a hurry. Domino grabs the chinlock, which goes as well as the average chinlock, meaning Moore fights up and brings Yang back in. Everything breaks down and a missile dropkick gets two on Domino. The moonsault press finishes for Jimmy.

Rating: C. Again: take two guys who have nothing else going on and put them into a team. It isn’t the best way to go and it isn’t going to light the company on fire, but Yang and Moore are having fun matches and adding the slightest bit of depth to the division. If WWE can do it with them, why can’t they do it with even more people?

Vince McMahon comes into the dressing room to yell at Finlay for letting Great Khali hurt Hornswoggle. Next week it’s Finlay vs. Great Khali in a Belfast Brawl.

Batista vs. Mark Henry

After a clip of Batista winning the 2005 Royal Rumble, they fight over a lockup with neither being able to get very far. A running shoulder doesn’t get Batista anywhere so it’s time to yell at each other instead. Henry is knocked outside so Batista follows and sends him into the barricade. That earns him a knockdown and a whip into the steps before the beating heads back inside. Henry’s Vader Bomb hits raised knees and a spear gives Batista two. The Batista Bomb is broken up so Batista goes with the spinebuster for the pin.

Rating: C-. Yeah you know what you’re getting here, as once Batista has beaten him one time, there is no real reason to be interested in seeing it happen again. We know he can’t hit the Batista Bomb so it was either going to be the spear or the spinebuster. Batista still feels like he gets a bit of a rub, but that isn’t exactly a big deal from Henry.

We look at Edge helping Chavo Guerrero become #1 contender to the ECW World Title.

It’s time for the VIP Lounge with Ric Flair as this week’s guest. Flair talks about wanting to dance all night long in a lounge like this and says he closed VIP lounges before MVP was born. MVP talks about how he beat Flair last year and promises to do it again. Flair lists off some legends he has beaten and says he likes MVP a lot. He reminds Flair of himself but knows that MVP is nothing like him. MVP says he’s better and Flair is ready to fight but we’ll save that for the Royal Rumble. After hitting the catchphrases, MVP gets punched out to the floor.

Michelle McCool vs. Layla

McCool grabs some headlock takeovers to start and shoulders her down for a basement dropkick. Back up and Layla goes after the knee to take over. That doesn’t last long as Michelle is up with some kicks, setting up a double underhook facebuster (Christopher Daniels’ Angel’s Wings) for the pin.

Rating: C-. They’re both trying and this was far from an embarrassing match, but you can only get so far with these women fighting over whatever catty issue they have. There isn’t room for a Women’s Title around here, but they have come a long way since the dark days. Michelle is getting more and more polished in the ring and that is nice to see as the effort is working out.

Video on Eve Torres.

Jamie Noble checks on Michelle McCool when a delivery man has flowers for her. They’re not from Jamie, but rather Chuck Palumbo, who apologizes profusely. Michelle accepts his apology but Noble doesn’t buy any of this. She tells them to get along for her sake. Sure.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Vickie Guerrero wishes Rey Mysterio good luck in the main event but he doesn’t buy it.

Edge/Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio/CM Punk

Punk works on Chavo’s arm to start and then shoulders him down. Rey comes in with a springboard seated senton for something like a Hart Attack to Chavo, meaning it’s off to Edge. Everything breaks down and the villains are sent outside for stereo dives as we take a break.

Back with Punk whipping Edge into the corner and raining down some right hands. A Chavo distraction lets Edge take over though and it’s the villains taking turns on Punk. Edge slides Punk shoulder first into the post and Chavo grabs an armbar. A backbreaker gives Chavo two but Punk kicks him down for a much needed breather. It’s still too early for the hot tag as Edge comes back in, only to miss a charge into the buckle. Rey comes back in to clean house but Edge chairs Rey down to break up the 619 and draw the DQ.

Rating: C+. Lame ending aside, this is a case where the talent alone is going to carry things. There were four good wrestlers in there and they got to do a completely passable story during their match. Good enough for a main event here as we barrel towards a pair of title matches next week.

Post match the brawl stays on the Edgeheads come in and help with the beatdown on Punk and Rey to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. As has been the case for a few weeks now, there is only so much that can be done for the Royal Rumble build. The World Title match is set, meaning this was more about setting up the ECW World Title match on next week’s TV rather than anything for the pay per view. Not a bad show, but the Rumble needs to get here already.

 

 

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