Survivor Series Count-Up – 2000: Austin’s Quest For Revenge

Survivor Series 2000
Date: November 19, 2000
Location: Ice Palace, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 18,602
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

After Austin was run over last year, it was revealed that Rikishi had been driving. Once people realized this was possibly the dumbest idea in wrestling history, the story was changed to Rikishi being the henchman for the real big bad: HHH. Tonight’s main event is Austin vs. HHH in a grudge match, along with Rock vs. Rikishi in a match that no one was asking for. Oh and remember that Angle guy that debuted here last year? He’s world champion now and defending against the now biker Undertaker. For some reason I never remember this show so hopefully it’ll make a better impression on me here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about HHH of course. This is one of those instances where I’m fine with the focus not being on the title match, because this story is more important.

Steve Blackman/Crash Holly/Molly Holly vs. T&A/Trish Stratus

If there’s a story here, I certainly can’t think of it. This was during the time where T&A took over the APA’s offices and called themselves the T&APA. Molly is brand new here and is still quite cute. Blackman is Hardcore Champion. Albert and Blackman start things off and apparently Crash is here because the APA left him in charge of the office. Speaking of Crash he comes in and dives into a slam from Albert, which is countered into a cross body.

Trish wants to beat up Crash but kicks Albert low instead. Off to Molly so Trish runs. Test comes in so Molly bails. We’re doing a lot of running around here without anything of note happening. Crash hits a nice slingshot rana for two but gets his head kicked off by Test. The Pumphandle Slam is escapes and Test is sent into Albert. Trish comes in and misses an elbow so it’s back to Molly. Albert pulls Molly’s hair but Trish can’t do anything with her yet. Blackman’s tag isn’t seen and T&A beats on Molly for a second before everything breaks down. A bulldog gets two for Trish but Molly finishes her with a top rope sunset flip.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t terrible or anything, but why wasn’t this a dark match? The story is barely there, the wrestling was just ok, and I don’t think this really fired up anyone for the show. I don’t get the thinking here but maybe they just wanted to get this out of the way before we got to everything else? That’s all I can think of. Trish and Molly looked good at least.

Molly is about to fall out of her top and Jerry loses it.

Christian is sick so Edge and Christian can’t help Angle in the world title match. They’re on for beers after the show though.

Tiger Ali Singh and Low Down (Chaz (Mosh from the Headbangers)/D’Lo Brown) can’t get into the building. This guy was around for years and never went anywhere.

Radicalz vs. Team Chyna

Chris Benoit, Perry Saturn, Dean Malenko, Eddie Guerrero

Road Dogg, Billy Gunn, K-Kwik, Chyna

Kwik is R-Truth, which is what I’ll be referring to him as more than likely. Eddie is IC Champion and Dean is Light Heavyweight Champion. I would call this Team DX but they’re not together anymore. Saturn and Gunn get things going here but it’s quickly off to Chyna for a double suplex. Chyna pounds away in the corner as we’re waiting on the Eddie vs. Chyna showdown. A powerslam gets two on Saturn and there’s the handspring elbow but Saturn catches her. A DDT puts Saturn down but everything breaks down. Eddie hits Chyna in the back with a title belt and Saturn gets the easy pin.

Roadie comes in next but gets suplexed down almost immediately. Off to Eddie who pounds away and dropkicks Dogg’s knee out. Dean comes in but it’s quickly back to Eddie for a slingshot hilo onto the knee. Eddie goes up but runs his mouth too long, allowing Roadie to superplex him down. There’s the hot tag to Billy who immediately charges into a triple team in the Radicals’ corner. Smart guy that Billy. Billy fights them off and takes over on Eddie with a gorilla press and the One and Only (sleeper drop) for the pin and elimination.

Off to Dean vs. Truth with the latter flipping out of a hip toss. Truth tries a Downward Spiral but Dean falls backwards instead. Eh they screwed that one up. Off to Benoit who wants nothing to do with the hipping and the hopping so he Germans the tar out of Truth for the pin to make it 3-2. Off to Saturn vs. Road Dogg with the former taking over. Dean suplexes Dogg down for two and it’s back to Saturn for a northern lights suplex to get us down to Saturn/Benoit/Malenko vs. Billy.

Billy gets to fight Dean first with the Radicals taking over quickly. Benoit low bridges Billy but Saturn accidentally superkicks Benoit on the floor. Back in the ring Dean ducks his head and the Fameasser makes it 2-1. A Jackhammer gets two on Saturn as Benoit makes the save. Benoit hits the Swan Dive for two and the Wolverine is shocked on the kickout. Benoit is sent to the apron and Gunn tries to suplex him back in, only for the Warrior/Rude ending with Saturn tripping Billy and holding his foot for the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine but it never got to be anything interesting. Truth never worked in the WWF in his original run and the whole tandem rapping thing with Road Dogg didn’t work at all. Gunn was into that awkward singles stage of his which never worked the way the company wanted it to. Not bad here but it was nothing better than fine.

Rock is here and doesn’t want to chat with Lillian.

Jericho talks about a beast that is about to explode, meaning himself against Kane. Jericho spilled coffee on Kane and made burn remarks, setting up this feud. Unfortunately Jericho didn’t get the Sanka on a Pole match.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Big pop for Jericho here. Jericho pounds away to start but the offense doesn’t have much effect. Kane slugs him down in the corner but Jericho keeps speeding things up. We head to the floor with Jericho diving mostly over the top to take Kane out. They head back to the apron and Jericho dropkicks Kane down to the floor. The steps get kicked into Kane’s face and the Canadian keeps control.

Jericho tries a top rope cross body but is easily caught and slammed down for two. Apparently Jericho has a bad back from being through through a window by Kane on Raw. Kane pounds him down in the corner but Jericho escapes a belly to back suplex with some right hands to the head. Jericho charges into a big boot and Kane hooks a freakish over the back choke, as in their backs are to each other with Kane pulling on Jericho’s chin while Jericho is in the air.

Kane pulls the buckle pad off but neither guy can get rammed into it. Kane uppercuts Jericho down over and over but Jericho keeps popping back up. Back to the floor with Kane still in full control. Kane goes up but gets crotched to slow him down. Another attempt at the clothesline jumps into a dropkick to the ribs and things speed up a bit.

Jericho blocks a big boot and goes up top with a missile dropkick getting two. Jericho’s forearm is caught but he slides down Kane’s back and rams him into the exposed buckle. There are the Walls on Kane for a good while but Kane finally crawls to the ropes. They get their legs intertwined and fall to the mat where Kane kicks Jericho off. In an embarrassing looking spot, Jericho hits the bulldog but Kane is too far away so the masked dude has to scoot over so it can hit. Not that it matters as he catches Jericho in a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: C-. This didn’t work for me for the most part. The idea was supposed to be about Kane hating Jericho for insulting him, but instead this was just a wrestling match. On top of that the match wasn’t a particularly good one with Jericho not really doing anything beyond his basic stuff. Their last man standing match at Armageddon was much better.

Terri tells the Radicals that HHH has a plan for later.

European Title: Hardcore Holly vs. William Regal

Regal is defending and he complains about American manners before the match. Holly pounds away to start and Regal is more than comfortable in a fist fight. Regal trips Holly up and sends him shoulder first into the post. The fans don’t seem to care about this and I can’t say I blame them. Regal works on the arm for awhile before waving to the fans. Off to a cross armbreaker for awhile before Holly is stomped to the floor. Regal works on the arm a bit more but gets caught by a crossbody for two. A low blow stops Holly and it’s back to the arm. Holly finally snaps and goes to the floor, grabs the belt and hits Regal for the DQ.

Rating: D-. LAME match here as it kept going forever (even though it didn’t even last six minutes) and no one cared. Then on top of that Holly just goes to the floor and gets the belt for a DQ? Why would he do something like that? My guess is his brain was melted by how boring this match was. I have no idea what they were thinking here.

Angle is warming up in the back when Trish comes up. Tonight is the start of Angle’s second year in the company and Trish points out that Stephanie isn’t here tonight, so maybe Kurt needs some “special” assistance.. Angle appreciates it but doesn’t need Test and Albert. Kurt was hilarious back then.

We recap Rock vs. Rikishi. Rikishi was revealed as the driver of the car that ran over Austin. When he was explaining what he did, he said that he did it for the Rock. Rock rose up the card during Austin’s absence because while Austin was there, the Samoans were being held down. Yep, they turned it into a race thing. Rikishi was in a car driven by HHH and drove at Rock, hitting him in the chest with a sledgehammer, leaving Rock in bad shape coming into tonight.

Rikishi vs. The Rock

Rock charges at the ring and it’s on quickly. Rock pounds Rikishi against the ropes and hits a Samoan Drop. He grabs a chair but Tim White disarms Rock, allowing Rikishi to superkick him down. A single stomp to Rock’s injured chest gives the fat man control. Rikishi hits a legdrop and Rock is already in trouble. Rock tries some right hands but Rikishi takes him right back down with a side slam for two.

Rock sends him to the floor and sends Rikishi’s head into the steps. Seriously, Rock, you’re half Samoan. You know better than that. Rikishi pops back up and drops Rock chest first onto the barricade to take over again. The referee gets run over and we head back into the ring. Rikishi pulls out a sledgehammer but walks into a Rock Bottom before he can swing it. The referee crawls back in but it only gets a very delayed two.

Rikishi takes him down again and hits a headbutt to the chest to take over again. A Samoan Drop puts Rock down and Rikishi sits down on his chest for two. Rikishi rams into Rock in the corner and loads up a Stinkface to humiliate Rock a bit. Rock explodes out of the corner with a clothesline and both guys are down. A superkick misses and Rock spinebusters him down. The People’s Elbow gets…the pin? A single elbow apparently is enough to keep Rikishi down for about 40 seconds while Rock crawls over to him. That’s one heck of an elbow.

Rating: C+. This took a bit to get going but once they got to the big slugfest stuff it was a lot better. At the end of the day though, Rikishi just did not belong in this world and he never worked as a heel. He’s a fat guy in a thong and not a guy that people want to boo. Thankfully once the six man Cell was over he pretty much just stopped being a main eventer and formed a Samoan monster team with Haku.

Post match Rikishi destroys Rock and lays him out with a bunch of Banzai Drops to the bad chest.

HHH is with the Radicals when Foley comes in and bans the Radicals from ringside in the main event. HHH doesn’t care so Foley makes it No DQ as well. HHH still doesn’t care. Methinks evil is afoot.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Lita

Ivory is in the RTC and is defending here. Lita goes straight at her and the fight is on fast. A quick hiptoss puts Ivory down as does an enziguri. Ivory comes back with a clothesline as Jerry panics over seeing Lita’s thong. Ivory hits a right hand and HOLY SWEET GOODNESS is Lita bleeding from it! I mean she is GUSHING. During the replay of it, Lita botches a rana and drives Ivory’s head into the mat. I’m not sure which of those hurt worse.

Steven Richards comes out so Lita throws Ivory to the floor and hits a big dive to take both of them out. A cross body gets two for Lita but the moonsault misses thanks to Steven. Ivory misses a belt shot and gets suplexed down. Lita takes her own top off but the moonsault hits knees. Apparently Ivory pulled the belt up and knocked Lita out with it to retain.

Rating: D. This was like any Raw match you would have ever seen. That’s the theme for this show so far: most of the matches are nothing special and could have been on most TV shows. Lita looked out of it in there, which says a lot for her as she got WAY better in a few years, as did Trish. Nothing to see here. Ivory would start feuding with Chyna very soon.

Coach has no updates on Rock.

Jericho jumps Kane and beats him up, setting up their rematch.

We recap Angle vs. Undertaker. Angle won EVERYTHING his rookie year and Taker is Taker. That’s about the extent of the feud.

Taker says this is his show and he’ll win the title.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending if that wasn’t clear. Before the match, Angle asks us for a moment of silence to reflect on our favorite Angle moment of the last year. We get some Florida can’t vote right jokes before Angle lists off his accomplishments in the last year. Taker cuts him off before Kurt gets to the Eurocontinental Title. This is the match where Taker is wearing the stupid looking light camo pants. If there’s one thing Taker should always wear, it’s dark colors.

Angle stalls on the floor to start and won’t get in the ring to fight. Taker goes out and gets a chair as Angle is in the ring. The champ hides behind the referee and Taker throws the chair over to Kurt to even the odds. As Taker is removing his coat, Angle blasts him with the chair and the bell finally rings. Taker pounds away in the corner to start but apparently punches himself out, allowing Undertaker to hammer away in the corner. A legdrop gets two for Taker as he pulls Angle up.

Old School (I know it’s called that because Taker shouts OLD SCHOOL before hitting it) hits but Taker would rather walk around than cover. Angle bails to the floor before the chokeslam can hit and things slow down again. This is Angle’s game at the point: hang in there long enough until he can find an opening and attack. Back in and Angle snaps off a suplex to take over and send Taker to the floor. Now Angle is telling Taker to get in the ring and fight. Nice touch.

Kurt dives off the apron at Taker but gets caught with ease (Kurt: “OH GOD NO!”) and rammed into the post. Taker does it again for fun and Angle is in trouble. Back in and Taker pounds away on the back but Angle gets in some shots to the leg to take over. The leg gets wrapped around the middle rope but Taker comes back with a Fujiwara Armbar. Here are Edge and Christian for a distraction a second before Angle taps out. Like every other schmuck face, Taker lets go of the hold when he has Angle dead to rights.

Angle picks the leg and takes Taker down again before hooking a leg lock. This goes on for awhile because the fact that Taker hasn’t tapped out in ten years has never taught a heel that his hold is no better than anyone elses. Taker escapes and bails to the floor to beat up the Canadians who I believe are ejected. Back in and there’s the chokeslam as Taker’s leg is fine. Edge and Christian have the referee again so the chokeslam only gets two.

A quick rollup with tights gets two for Kurt and a Russian legsweep gets the same for Taker. After a quick breather for Angle on the floor, he comes back in for a bad Figure Four on the challenger. Taker reverses and Angle gets the rope as is the custom for this sequence. A powerslam gets two for Taker but Angle goes right back to the leg. Kurt throws the Figure Four on around the post but Taker kicks him off.

Back in and Taker is right back up to his feet because he doesn’t feel like selling tonight. There’s only so much Angle can do when all the work he does on the leg doesn’t mean anything because Taker won’t just freaking limp. Angle hits Taker low and like an idiot tries a Tombstone. Taker counters the counter and drills Angle off the apron to the floor.

Kurt dives under the ring but Taker pulls him back out. Back in and Taker hits the Last Ride….but the referee won’t count the three. Why not? Because that’s not Kurt Angle. That’s ERIC Angle, Kurt’s nearly identical brother in identical tights. Kurt comes in and rolls Taker up with a handful of tights for the pin to retain. That’s the first time in seven years that the title hasn’t changed hands at this PPV.

Rating: C+. That’s actually a brilliant ending and it keeps both guys looking strong at the same time. They used the same thing with Lesnar vs. Angle in 2003 and it still worked there too. As for the match, most of the praise for it should go to Kurt and most of the blame should go to Taker. Angle could wrestle the match of his life, but if Undertaker won’t sell the knee injury, it doesn’t make a bit of difference. That can’t be blamed on Kurt though, and the match wasn’t terrible as it was. These two would have MUCH better matches down the line too.

After some replays, Kurt runs from the arena to a waiting car to bail.

The XFL has cheerleaders!

Team Dudley Boys vs. Team Edge and Christian

Dudley Boys, Hardy Boys vs. Edge and Christian, Bull Buchanan, Goodfather

Buchanan and Goodfather are the RTC and they’re actually tag champions here instead of one of the other three teams. Bubba and Bull start things off but the crowd is kind of dead so far. Bubba elbows him down for two and it’s off to D-Von. A big boot puts D-Von down and it’s off to Goodfather for another boot to the head but no cover. Off to Christian who pounds away at D-Von but walks into a reverse inverted DDT. This match isn’t exactly taking off.

Matt comes in to clean house as everything breaks down. The Hardys take off their shirts to reveal camo shirts that match the Dudleys. In the melee, the Edge-O-Matic (actually called that here) pins Matt. D-Von vs. Edge now with the former hitting a swinging neckbreaker for no cover. D-Von takes down both Canadians with a double clothesline but a Buchanan distraction lets Christian hit the Killswitch for the elimination to make it 4-2.

Bubba comes in and throws Christian around a bit before it’s off to Jeff. The fans want tables but they get Jeff sent to the floor and a tag to Buchanan. Back to Bubba who runs over the Bull a few times and beats up Goodfather a bit too. The Canadians get backdropped a few times before Edge accidentally spears Buchanan down, giving Bubba an easy pin. Christian accidentally splashes Edge giving Bubba another easy pin. It’s Jeff/Bubba vs. Christian/Goodfather.

They botch something but Goodfather hooks a Death Valley Driver for the pin on Bubba. Jeff gets to start with Christian but knocks Goodfather off the apron first. Christian misses a charge and hits post. The Swanton eliminates Christian and about twenty seconds later Val Venis (also RTC) clotheslines Goodfather by mistake, giving Jeff the winning pin.

Rating: C-. Much like the rest of the show, this wasn’t bad but it was nothing interesting for the most part. The tag division would get going again soon with TLC 2 which was somehow even better than the first edition. Having Jeff win here is fine but without Matt at this point, the fans didn’t really care. Granted that could be said about the rest of the show too. Again, another acceptable match but nothing I’ll remember in an hour.

Jeff gets beaten up but the Dudleys and Matt make the save and put the RTC through tables.

Austin is walking.

HHH tells the Radicals they know what to do.

We recap Austin vs. HHH. You know the story by this point: Rikishi had a boss and it was revealed to be HHH. HHH explained that he did it because while Austin was gone, HHH rose to the top of the company and even took over everything. Tonight is the big fight between the two of them and it’s No DQ.

Steve Austin vs. HHH

No DQ remember. I miss the My Time song that HHH used to use, but this is a remix of it that isn’t as good. After a little staredown, Austin goes right at HHH and beats him around the ring. The initial beatdown goes on for a few minutes with Austin focusing on the back due to some physical therapy HHH has been having or something like that. HHH comes back with a Facebuster but Austin immediately hits the Thesz Press to take him right back down.

They head to the floor with Austin still in full control. Austin picks up a big piece of metal but HHH knocks it away. They fight over to the production area and then to the back and then back to the arena in a few seconds. Back in the aisle, HHH counters a suplex into one of his own to put Austin in even more trouble. They fight back to ringside and Austin is thrown onto the announce table before fighting back, sending HHH into the steps.

After destroying the timekeeper’s area, Austin slams a monitor into HHH’s head to bust him open. The beer cooler is thrown around, resulting in a huge puddle on the floor. Austin has a seat on the steps and has a beer because he’s thirsty. HHH gets thrown into the ring but Austin stops to yell at JR, allowing the Game to get in some shots. A Stunner is countered into a neckbreaker and both guys are down.

HHH sends Austin into the post and bends him around said post, now working on the back which Austin had surgery on. A brief Austin comeback is stopped dead by another neckbreaker. HHH’s psychology is working well here. Austin comes back with that whip spinebuster but the middle finger elbow misses. They head back outside with both guys getting whipped into the barricade. HHH gets the advantage and loads up a Pedigree on the steps but gets backdropped through the announce table in a cool spot.

They head back inside and HHH bails to the corner. WHY WOULD YOU BACK INTO A CORNER AGAINST STEVE AUSTIN??? He deserves the mudhole stomping he gets. There’s the Stunner but Austin stops before covering. Instead Austin gets a chair and sets to Pillmanize the ankle. He thinks twice of that and wraps the chair around HHH’s neck instead. HHH rolls to the floor and they fight up the aisle again.

This time they head to the production area and then through a curtain and into the back, the same place they went for a few seconds earlier. HHH rams Austin into an anvil case but Austin sends him into a soda machine. Here are the Radicalz to attack Austin and give HHH a breather. After referees pull back the Radicalz, Austin chases HHH into the parking lot where HHH gets into a car. All of a sudden HHH is on a mic which is stupid but you have to go with it. Austin is nowhere to be seen. Oh wait there he is in a forklift, picking HHH and his car up. HHH screams for mercy and is dropped down, destroying the car to end the show.

Rating: B-. This was ok but it never got to the point they were reaching for I don’t think. The problem here is the same as it was in 1996 for Austin: everyone remembers the rematch far better because it’s probably better. That being said, this wasn’t nearly as good as the first Austin vs. Hart match but I digress. This wasn’t that great, but it was ok. It’s not PPV main event good, but for a big brawl it was acceptable.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a really hard one to grade. The problem with this show is that while nothing on it was bad, nothing on it was good either. Nothing on this show is something that I will ever want to watch again because nothing on it is anything above ok. The title I used for the other review of this is that I never remember this show. Well there’s a reason for that: it’s not very good. If you have to see every show in the series you won’t hate it, but there’s no reason to watch this other than for the sake of completeness.

Ratings Comparison

Steve Blackman/Crash Holly/Molly Holly vs. T&A/Trish Stratus

Original: D+

Redo: C-

The Radicalz vs. Team Chyna

Original: B-

Redo: C

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B-

Redo: C-

William Regal vs. Hardcore Holly

Original: D-

Redo: D-

The Rock vs. Rikishi

Original: B

Redo: C+

Ivory vs. Lita

Original: D+

Redo: D

Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Team Dudley Boys vs. Team Edge and Christian

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Steve Austin vs. HHH

Original: D-

Redo: B-

Overall Rating:

Original: D+

Redo: C-

That main event is the big surprise as I HATED it the first time but I thought it was pretty good here. Odd indeed.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/24/survivor-series-2000-i-never-remember-this-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1999: Austin vs. Rock vs. HHH

Survivor Series 1999
Date: November 14, 1999
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 18,735
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is a BIG show (pun intended) as a lot of stuff happens here. We’ve got a hall of famer debuting, a new world champion, and Austin getting run over by a car, putting him out of action for about a year. Everyone remembers it for the ending and the car stuff, so maybe there’s other good stuff in here too. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about the world title match tonight which they promoted knowing that it wasn’t going to happen. Stay classy WWF.

Team Godfather/D’Lo Brown vs. Team Dudley Boys

Godfather, D’Lo Brown, Headbangers

Dudley Boys, Acolytes

The Dudleys are brand new, having been around maybe a month or two. This is the debut of Brown as Godfather’s partner in pimping. The Headbangers are dressed as pimps as well which is pretty funny. Bubba still has a bad stutter here which was his whole gimmick for a few months. Godfather makes fun of him to even further tick the Dudleys off. The Acolytes are freshly out of the Corporate Ministry which has broken up and are just big tough guys now.

Bubba vs. Mosh (in afro) start things off. Bubba steals said afro but things speed up and the Dudleys are in trouble. A HARD clothesline takes Mosh down and it’s off to D-Von. The Dudleys were awesome at this point and were like nothing anyone had seen in years. Even their look was totally different and it worked very well. Off to Thrasher who has an afro held on with a chinstrap.

Bradshaw comes in and pounds away on Thrasher a bit before pounding him upside the head. Thrasher misses a corner charge and the Clothesline eliminates him quickly. Off to Mosh vs. Farrooq with the latter missing a charge in the corner but not being affected by it that badly. Back to D-Von as Jerry talks about wanting ho’s for Christmas. Mosh hits the running crotch attack to D-Von’s back but it’s off to Bubba via a blind tag and the 3D puts out Mosh, making it 4-2.

Brown comes in with a forearm to the head of Bubba and a legdrop for two. For absolutely no apparent reason, Bradshaw blasts Brown with the chair for a DQ, and does the same to Bubba as well, knocking him out cold. D-Von and Farrooq both want the pin and get in a fight over it, resulting in a double countout for a double elimination despite neither of them being legal. That would be the Dudleys’ first real feud.

Back in the ring Bubba gets two on Brown as it’s apparently 2-1 now. A suplex gets two for Bubba and it’s time for the bouncing punches from Ray. Brown comes back with a Sky High for two and loads up a top rope rana, only to get caught in a middle rope sitout powerbomb for two which looked awesome. A double clothesline puts both guys down and it’s hot tag to Godfather. The Ho Train sets up the Low Down for the final elimination.

Rating: C. I remember reading someone say that Godfather was the perfect opening act because you were guaranteed a good pop whenever he was out there. The more I see of him in matches like this, the more I agree with that statement. The guy wasn’t that great or anything, but the fans loved him and he was always a fun character that you didn’t have to take too seriously. That kind of fun character is a great choice for an opener and this was a fine opener here too.

Remember that future hall of famer debuting tonight? We get a video telling us how awesome his name is and how awesome his life has been so far. His name: Kurt Angle.

Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Stasiak

Stasiak is most famous for being an idiot in the Alliance and being the son of the most forgotten world champion ever in Stan Stasiak. Never heard of him? I think that proves my point. Angle has the Patriot’s old music which would become far more famous with its new owner. Angle immediately hits a fireman’s carry takeover and the boring chants start about fifteen seconds in.

They head to the mat with Angle hooking a hammerlock. The fans chant for the Redwings because someone actually wrestling in a wrestling match is an evil idea to fans in 1999. Stasiak comes back with a clothesline and a vertical suplex for two. Off to a chinlock which Kurt escapes pretty quickly. Angle comes back with a clothesline and goes to get the mic. He demands not to be booed because he’s the best in the world.

Back in and Kurt hits something like a dropkick but is put right back into the chinlock. The hold is broken again and Angle comes back with a powerslam for two. Stasiak hits a lay out F5 but misses a top rope cross body. The Olympic Slam gets the pin and starts the hottest rookie year ever in wrestling.

Rating: D+. For a debut, this wasn’t great. However, this would be the start of one of one of the best careers of all time. Angle being serious wasn’t the right choice for him and it wasn’t until he became a total goof that took himself WAY too seriously while being stupid at the same time that he became the awesome Kurt that we know and love. It helped that he could go with anyone in the ring too.

We get a clip from earlier on Heat where HHH called Austin and Rock to the ring in an attempted ambush but the combined forces of Road Dogg and X-Pac didn’t stop two of the biggest stars ever. He wasn’t quite the Cerebral Assassin yet.

Team Val Venis vs. Team British Bulldog

Val Venis, Mark Henry, Gangrel, Steve Blackman

British Bulldog, Mean Street Posse

Even JR says that Val’s team has nothing in common at all. The Posse is a group of three guys from Greenwich, Connecticut who wear sweater vests and never won a match that wasn’t a hardcore match that they won by mistake. I have no idea why this match exists but my guess is “we have no idea what else to do with these fifteen minutes.” Bulldog is European Champion here which is likely a title Val wants.

The captains start things off and after some quick offense from both, it’s off to Pete Gas (the Posse was Rodney, Pete Gas and Joey Abs). Pete is scared to death of having to actually wrestle so it’s back to Bulldog. Once Venis is down it’s off to Pete who hits a slingshot to send Val chest first into the buckle. A belly to back suplex gets two for Pete as Jerry asks where JR would get nice clothes in Oklahoma. JR: “Arkansas.” Off to Blackman for the only thing he could do: martial arts. A bicycle kick gets the quick elimination for Blackman.

Off to Rodney who has even less luck against Blackman, immediately getting taken down. Gangrel comes in who gets caught in a crucifix for two before Gangrel realizes he’s fighting Rodney. He pounds on the Posse dude, shrugs off a cheap shot from Joey, and plants Rodney with the implant DDT (Edgecution) for the elimination. Joey, by far the best of the three Posse members, comes in and gets to face Mark Henry. Joey actually hits a hot shot on Henry but crotches himself on the middle rope. Mark does about what you would expect him to and splashes him for the pin.

So it’s 4-1 now and Bulldog comes in to fight Henry. Mark runs Bulldog over with ease and it’s off to Gangrel. Gangrel goes up top and is immediately crotched and superplexed down to make it 3-1. Blackman is in next but he misses a middle rope headbutt. He argues with the referee and gets caught in a fisherman’s suplex to make it Henry/Val vs. Bulldog. Val gets to start but it’s quickly a double team. Jerry: “Hey what’s this?” JR: “Well it looks like Mark Henry and Val Venis double teaming the Bulldog King.” Val gets sent to the floor but Henry splashes Bulldog, allowing Val to come in off the top with the Money Shot for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was as worthless as it was advertised. The Posse is one of those groups that is funny in retrospect but at the time they were wasting PPV time when there had to have been better options for this spot. Venis would have been a bigger deal a year ago so I’m not quite sure why he was in this spot either. Little trivia note: this is the shortest four on four Survivor Series match ever, breaking the record set about 20 minutes ago.

Michael Cole walks in on the Divas locker room and has to rub oil on Ivory’s stomach. Next.

Fabulous Moolah/Mae Young/Tori/Debra vs. Ivory/Luna Vachon/Terri Runnels/Jacqueline

Thank goodness this isn’t an elimination match. For some reason Moolah and Mae were wrestling in 99 with Moolah even winning the Women’s Title at one point. Jerry’s face when Debra comes out is hilarious. Ivory is Women’s Champion at this point. Moolah jumps the champion in the aisle to start but gets shoved down for her efforts. We officially start with Tori vs. Jackie but Luna comes in for some double teaming.

Keep in mind that Tori is a wrestler in name only, Mae and Moolah combined to be over 150 years old, and Terri and Debra are there as eye candy. After less than two minutes, a double clothesline from the old chicks gives Moolah the pin on Ivory. This may have been the worst idea this side of the birth of a hand. This is what Raw is for people.

Moolah and Ivory “brawl” post match.

X-Pac lists off everything wrong with Kane and says he’ll win tonight. Short and simple here.

X-Pac vs. Kane

Pac turned on Kane when they were partners, starting a feud that went on for MONTHS. X-Pac eventually stole Kane’s girlfriend Tori as well, turning her into a smoking hot valet instead of a smoking hot bad wrestler. Earlier today, Tori and Kane said they don’t take what X-Pac has done personally. Kane has the awesome inverted tights colors tonight. Pac jumps Kane during the entrance and we start fast.

Kane no sells all of the shots to his head. I’ve always wondered if the mask is supposed to absorb the offense from the other guy. Kane chokes away and uppercuts Pac down for no cover. Kane goes up but Pac dropkicks him in the head on the way up in a nice counter. We head to the floor for a bit where Pac sends him into the post to take over. Kane comes back with an uppercut but gets kicked in the head to take him back down.

More kicking slows Kane down but the Bronco Buster is countered by a hand around the throat. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Pac down and there’s the top rope clothesline. There’s the chokeslam but Road Dogg comes in to break up the pin. Kane stalks the Dogg to the floor but walks into the X-Factor for two. The tombstone is loaded up but HHH comes in with the world title shot to the head to draw the DQ.

Rating: C+. I liked this a lot more than most matches that X-Pac had going on at this time. The problem was that Pac would win all of his matches against monsters and it would get more and more unrealistic every time. Here though Kane took a lot of offense from Pac but it didn’t really hurt him, which is what made this much better. The feud would go on WAY too long though.

Post match Kane gets beaten down until Tori comes out. Pac kicks Tori in the face and Kane snaps, sending DX “scattering like quail” according to JR.

The Rock says nothing because HHH shows up and they brawl.

Big Show vs. Mideon/Viscera/Big Boss Man/Prince Albert

This was supposed to be Big Show and Kaientai and Blue Meanie but Show beat them up so he could do this himself. This is during Boss Man vs. Big Show, which is based around Boss Man making fun of Show for having his dad die (kayfabe). It led to a bad moment at a “funeral” where Boss Man stole the coffin and dragged Show along the ground on top of the coffin with a car. Show chokes Albert to the floor and chokeslams Mideon for the pin in less than 20 seconds. Albert is gone 10 seconds later to a chokeslam, as is Big Visc. Boss Man is like screw this and walks out. Show wins in less than 90 seconds.

Austin is in the back but HHH comes up to attack him too. HHH runs away with Austin chasing after him. Austin winds up in a parking garage and is run over by a car which speeds away. This was the way that Austin was written off TV for the better part of a year to have major neck surgery. He had needed it forever but it wasn’t until now when the company could afford to let him off for that long.

The question would eventually be who ran him over, and it would eventually be revealed as Rikishi in one of the biggest WHAT WERE THEY THINKING moments ever. Test, Stephanie, Vince and eventually HHH show up to look at Austin with most of them being concerned. JR goes to see him as well. Vince accuses HHH and DX but they deny any involvement.

Intercontinental Title: Chyna vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho has only been around a few months and is challenging here. Chyna has Miss Kitty here who isn’t even hiding that she’s T&A here, coming out in a bikini and that’s it. Oh and boots. It’s a brawl to start and Kitty is shoved down because Jericho is a jerk. They head to the floor with Jericho’s knees going into the steps, but Chyna misses a dive off said steps to give the Canadian control.

Back in and Jericho gets hot shotted onto the ropes and put in the Tree of Woe. Chyna tries a German but Jericho kicks her low….with no effect because Chyna isn’t a guy. A standing rana takes Jericho down but he pops back up and clotheslines her to the floor. The springboard dive takes Chyna out again as JR talks about not being into the match due to what happened to Austin. For once this is an acceptable statement.

Jericho throws Chyna over the announce table and pours water over her head because Jericho is a jerk. Back in and a missile dropkick gets two for Jericho as does a small package for Chyna. Chyna tries to make a comeback but Jericho bulldogs him down for two and a BIG face pop. A spinwheel kick puts Chyna down and Jericho is swaggering. A clothesline puts Chyna on the floor and Kitty gets kissed.

Chyna comes back with a spear and posts Jericho as the crowd noticeably gets quieter. Back in and Jericho hits a layout powerbomb for two and Jericho is getting frustrated. Lionsault misses and Chyna hits the springboard elbow and a DDT for two. With about two minutes left, Lawler mentions a stipulation that Jericho will get a sex change if he loses. Keep those priorities straight guys.

With the referee down, a belt shot to the head gets two for Chris but Chyna comes back with a Pedigree for two of her own. Jericho puts her in the Walls but Chyna finally makes the rope. The place boos the submission being broken. Jericho loads up a superplex but a Kitty distraction lets Chyna hit him low and a Pedigree (kind of) off the top gets the pin to retain the title.

Rating: B. This took a bit to get going but they hit a groove in that ending sequence. The most important thing here though was Jericho wrestled her like any other opponent rather than making a spectacle out of her being a woman. These two would stay at it for awhile until Chyna went nuts and eventually started wrestling women, which was the downfall of her career. Well that and being nuts and HHH breaking up with her, but that’s another story.

HHH comes in to see Shane, Stephanie and Test. He still denies having anything to do with it but wants to know if the match is now one on one. Shane says he’ll think of something. Note that Test is there with Shane.

Team Too Cool vs. Team Edge/Christian

Too Cool, The Hollys

Edge/Christian, Hardy Boys

This is just after the Hardys and the Canadians had the first tag team ladder match which would launch them into stardom soon after. Too Cool is still stupid here, as opposed to later on when they would be stupid and WAY over. The Hardys have Terri with them which wouldn’t last long. Edge and Scotty get things started as Jerry talks about Scotty’s pants. They chop it out in the corner before things speed up a bit and Edge spinwheel kicks him down.

Off to Crash vs. Matt with Matt getting two off a suplex. Crash gets crotched on the top and punched to the floor. Grandmaster sneaks up on Matt for a sunset bomb to the floor. We unleash the dives as everyone small enough to hits a big dive to take out everyone that was already on the floor with Jeff capping it off. Back in and Christian powerslams Crash for two. The Hollys hit a Hart Attack on Crash Christian for two of their own and Hardcore is in.

We’re promised an update on Austin at the end of this match because THIS MATCH of all things is more important than a guy being hit by a car. Off to Grandmaster whose bulldog is countered and he goes flying so far that he kicks the camera, giving us a cool visual. Off to Hardcore vs. Edge who starts spearing a lot of people. Grandmaster stops to dance and is immediately speared down. In the big melee, Hardcore rolls up Edge for the pin. Fifteen seconds later, Scotty hits a top rope DDT to eliminate Matt, making it 4-2.

Jeff and Scotty do a fast pinfall reversal sequence before Scotty hits the not yet popular Worm. A sitout powerbomb by Scotty with Grandmaster assisting gets two as does a middle rope missile dropkick from Sexay. Too Cool hits the second Hart Attack of the match which gets two on Jeff. Everything breaks down but the Hollys get in an argument. Terri gets on the apron for a distraction which lets Christian hit both of Too Cool low. Jeff hits a 450 on Scotty for the elimination.

So it’s Crash/Grandmaster/Hardcore Holly vs. Jeff and Christian. JR goes on a rant about Austin as Christian and Jeff try some Poetry in Motion, but Hardcore comes off the top with a missile dropkick in a SWEET looking counter. Grandmaster adds a guillotine legdrop for the elimination. Christian immediately hits a reverse DDT on Grandmaster to get us down to Christian vs. the Hollys.

JR continues to brood and want an update about Austin. Jerry needling him makes me chuckle as he’s awesome at being a jerk. Crash beats on Christian for a bit before it’s off to Hardcore again. Back to Crash who gets caught in the Unprettier/Killswitch for the pin. Christian tries a victory roll on Hardcore but Bob (Hardcore for you schmucks out there) falls on top for the final pin.

Rating: C+. The problem here was that the pairing that this should have been based around, Edge and Christian and the Hardys, were on the same team rather than getting to tear the house down against each other. The other two teams didn’t mean anything and the ending of this sucked. Once the Dudleys got involved with the brother teams, it was all gravy for almost two years.

Shane says that Vince is at the emergency room with Austin. Austin never lost consciousness but is still undergoing tests. Shane says there will be a triple threat tonight, but Austin won’t be in it. Test is there once again.

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Mankind/Al Snow

The Outlaws are defending. Jerry accuses Billy of being the driver but Lawler doesn’t care at all. Mankind says Austin will get through this. Gunn and Mankind get things going with Billy getting two off a neckbreaker. We hit a sleeper like a minute in and then we look at the Head. JR and Jerry are arguing again as the guys in the ring go to th efloor, making them guys no longer in the ring.

Roadie accidentally hits Billy in the face and it’s off to Snow vs. Road Dogg. JR talks about Snow having his action figure pulled off the shelves at Wal-Mart because some stupid professor said that having a severed head included in a toy would send the wrong message to her kids about violence to women. This is going to be a quick sidebar.

First and foremost, it’s not a severed head. It’s a mannequin head and simply LOOKING AT THE FREAKING THING would tell you that. Second, if you’re concerned about what kind of impression a toy would give to your kids, either A, don’t buy it for them, or B, TELL THEM WHY YOU DON’T LIKE IT. Heaven forbid you have to tell your kid he can’t have something he wants because you deem it inappropriate. Third, and this is the part that I like best, Snow mentioned in a promo that clearly the stores care about their customers because they pulled the figure from the shelves, but the guns, bullets and knives are still on the shelves.

Anyway, now that the stupid people who can’t think before they run their mouths and have to decide how people should live their lives because apparently people aren’t smart enough to make decisions for themselves are out of the way, let’s get back to this dull match. Mankind pounds on Roadie in the corner and hits a running knee to the head. Snow pokes Road Dogg with a chair in the ribs which isn’t a DQ for some reason. Neither is the shot to Road Dogg’s back from Mankind.

Mankind hooks a reverse chinlock back in the ring followed by a lot of stomping in the corner from Al. Mankind gets two off a knee lift as things continue to go slowly. Snow hits his headbutts but Road Dogg fires off some lefts and a big right to take Snow down. Everything breaks down and the crowd is DEAD for this. They head to the floor with the Outlaws taking over.

Snow gets beaten on for awhile before clotheslining Roadie down and it’s not hot tag to Mankind. Mankind pounds away for a bit but gets caught by the Fameasser for two. Snow hits the Snow Plow on Road Dogg and here’s Socko. Both Outlaws get Clawed but they both hit Mankind low to escape. Snow hits Billy with Head to give Mankind a two count, followed quickly by the Outlaws hitting a spike piledriver on Mankind to retain.

Rating: D. This got better at the end but the twelve minutes before that were way too dull to be considered good at all. Mankind and Snow were there to fill in spots and while that’s ok, it doesn’t make for an interesting match. It didn’t help that the crowd was deader than Billy Gunn’s career for most of the match. Nothing to see here.

Since Vince is at the hospital, he won’t be refereeing the main event tonight.

We see Austin get run down again.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. HHH vs. ???

The third man is…..shockingly not Test but rather the Big Show. I mentioned Test over and over again tonight because every sign on the planet pointed to him being the guy but they went with Show instead. That’s not to say this is a horrible idea or that it doesn’t make sense because there were no clues or anything beforehand, but it was certainly a surprising pick.

Rock and HHH attack Show to start but to no avail. Show shoulder blocks them down but Rock breaks up a chokeslam on the Game. HHH is defending if that’s not clear. Rock and HHH team up to clothesline Show to the floor but Rock is quickly pulled to the floor. All three guys wind up on the floor with HHH getting dropped on the barricade. Back in and Show misses a splash in the corner and gets caught in a Russian legsweep for no cover.

The People’s Elbow gets one on Show as HHH saves. This is one fall to a finish in case you were wondering. HHH chokes Rock in the corner but Show gets back up and side slams Rock for two. Show kicks HHH to the floor and knocks the Game up the aisle. The fans don’t seem to be sure what to think of Show in this spot but they’re not bored. Rock charges up the aisle to clothesline Show down before going after HHH again.

HHH gets knocked through a production table and Rock is in control. Scratch that theory as Show comes in and beats the tar out of HHH, only to have Rock hit Show with a fire extinguisher. Rock and HHH start heading back to the ring but HHH suplexes him in the aisle. Show is back because the guy can’t be kept down. Show drops HHH on the announce table but Rock drills Show in the head with the bell. Rock and HHH hit a double suplex on Show through the table for the WHOA spot of the match.

Rock and HHH head into the crowd to brawl as this has been a wild fight for the majority of the match so far. Back to the ring and the referee gets clotheslined down by Rock by mistake. The Rock Bottom and Pedigree are both countered, the latter being countered into a catapult into the buckle. There’s the Rock Bottom but there’s no referee. Shane runs out in a referee’s shirt to count two.

Another Rock Bottom hits but Show pulls Shane out of the ring. Rock goes after Show on the floor which goes about as well as you would expect. Actually scratch that as you might expect Rock to beat Show up. Show puts him on the table and goes back into the ring to knock HHH down before going back to beat on Rock some more. Rock gets thrown into the steps and HHH has the belt, only for Shane to take it away. HHH Pedigrees Shane and they’re all back inside again. Here’s DX to go after Big Show and Rock but here’s Vince as well. He knocks HHH out with the belt and a chokeslam makes Show champion.

Rating: C-. This didn’t work that well for me at all. Show has no connection to the feud at all which hurts things a bit, but at the end of the day there was no real flow to the match at all. Show winning is a good pick as it gives some closure to the week for him where his dad died and all that, but his title reign wouldn’t work all that well due to him mainly feuding with Big Boss Man. Still though, decent moment but a bad match.

Show celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a very back and forth show as the stuff that was interesting was interesting (although not necessarily good) and the stuff that was bad and dull was VERY bad and dull. This show is much more about setting things up for the future, which is ok, but it doesn’t really do much for those of us watching this. Not really recommended, but there are some far worse shows out there.

Ratings Comparison

Team Godfather/D’Lo Brown vs. Team Dudley Boys

Original: B-

Redo: C

Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Stasiak

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Team Val Venis vs. Team British Bulldog

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Team Mae Young vs. Team Ivory

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Kane vs. X-Pac

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Big Show vs. Team Big Boss Man

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Chyna vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

Redo: B

Team Too Cool vs. Team Edge/Christian

Original: B

Redo: C+

New Age Outlaws vs. Al Snow/Mankind

Original: D+

Redo: D

Big Show vs. HHH vs. The Rock

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D+

I liked most of the matches better the first time and the overall rating was higher. Simple and easy, as usual.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/08/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1999-a-lot-happens-here/

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Monday Nitro – June 15, 1998: The Roddy Piper Show

Monday Nitro #141
Date: June 15, 1998
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Laryr Zbyszko

We’re past the Great American Bash and the main development is Sting holds both tag team titles. Seriously, other than that not a ton has changed. Hogan, Hart, Piper and Savage had their match which changed absolutely nothing and Booker is the TV Champion again. There’s not much else to say about the show, which is a good indication of how important that show was. We’re now four weeks away from Bash at the Beach so let’s get to it.

Public Enemy vs. Hugh Morrus/Barbarian

This opens the show as Public Enemy is on their way to the ring as Tony welcomes us to the show. It’s a street fight meaning the weapons are flying as soon as the Public Enemy hits the ring. As usual it’s pure insanity with everyone hitting everyone else in the head and Grunge being sent head first into a garbage can. Even Jimmy Hart gets in a cheap shot with a sheet of medal.

Hugh backdrops Rocco into a powerbomb from Barbarian and a bunch of garbage can shots keep Rocco down. Grunge comes back in with some trashcan lid shots to Barbarian as Morrus loads up a table on the floor. A frying pan to the crotch slows Morrus down but he’s good enough to bulldog Rocco. Jimmy tries some more shots to Rocco’s head, earning him a suplex into the ring. Rocco is eventually suplexed over the top and through the table, but he lands on Barbarian for the pin.

Rating: D-. I can’t stand these matches. I get the idea of appealing to the ECW fanbase but couldn’t they come up with something more interesting than just hitting each other in the head with metal? These matches don’t add anything at all and when it takes a few seconds to determine who won, there’s probably a problem.

We get the opening pyro display and the announcers’ usual recap of the recent events around these parts.

Earlier today Mike interviewed some fans to find out if they were ready for Nitro.

We recap the Wolfpack recruiting Page from last week.

Opening sequence.

Nitro Girls.

Here’s how to get a Nitro Party!

Here’s Savage for an interview. He has a message for Piper and that is….that he wants DDP in the Wolfpack. Savage talks about Wyatt Earp wanting to help the Wolfpack and goes into a sales pitch to Page for a spot on the team. He wants Page in a cage match tonight and if Page can beat him, Page can join the team with Savage’s full endorsement.

We get some stills of the tag match last night.

Chris Benoit vs. Fit Finlay

Tenay suggests that this is a #1 contenders match for the TV Title but I don’t think that’s official. Benoit takes him into the corner to start and this is going to be a physical one. The fans are all over Finlay from the bell and he seems a bit shaken by it. Finlay takes him down with a headlock and cranks on the arm a bit before just kicking Benoit in the face. We hit the chinlock on the Canadian before Benoit fights up and hits a backbreaker to send Finlay to the floor.

Finlay sends him back first into the apron before taking him inside for a reverse chinlock. Benoit stands up and drops Finlay down onto his back for two. We come back from a break with Finlay dropping a knee on Benoit’s face for two. Chris fights up again with some hard boots to the ribs but gets dropped throat first across the top rope. Finlay misses a charge into the post and Benoit hits the Rolling Germans to put both guys down.

Benoit is up first but the Swan Dive only hits mat and Finlay drops another knee to the head. These shots are making me cringe more and more every time. The rolling senton puts Benoit down again but Benoit goes into beast mode, countering the tombstone into the Crossface for the win.

Rating: C+. This took some time to get going but everything after the break was awesome. These two beat the crap out of each other, but the shots to the head are hard to sit through. It’s good to see Benoit get a win after losing the series though, so maybe there’s hope for him yet. Solid match here for the most part though.

Post match Gene comes into the ring to interview Benoit about the series with Booker. Benoit invites Booker out here to see him face to face for some business. Here’s Harlem Heat and Benoit stares Booker down, only to shake and raise his hand. Booker calls Benoit the best man he’s ever been in the ring with and Benoit says to say the word if Booker ever needs a good man in his corner.

This isn’t cool with Stevie who calls Benoit a pipsqueak. Benoit repeats what he said and Booker offers another handshake but Stevie blasts Benoit in the face. Cue Mongo (dang it) to pull Stevie off but Booker breaks it up. Harlem Heat leaves and Benoit says he’s here for one thing, and he holds up the four fingers.

Post breaks here’s DDP to answer Savage’s challenge. Well in theory at least as Page would rather talk about Hogan and Rodman. They’re both somewhere between a cockroach and that white stuff that accumulates at the corner of your mouth when you’re really thirsty (direct quote from the movie Con Air). Apparently there’s a tag match at Bash at the Beach with Page having a partner to be named. Oh and Savage is on for the cage match tonight.

We get a clip of Hogan and Rodman attacking Page with chairs last week. Apparently there are rumors that NBA superstar Karl Malone might don the tights and join WCW. I’m guessing that was the major announcement that wasn’t made on Thunder.

Nitro Girls.

Gene is in the ring again and it’s time for Piper’s weekly rambling. Piper: “GOD BLESS FRANK SINATRA!” Sinatra died a month before this, so I’m assuming it was a tribute, but that’s a bit late isn’t it? Anyway, Piper talks about remembering the Statue of Liberty wearing a kilt (I rescind my thought on it being a tribute and vote for Piper is nuts) and says he’s tough enough to make Rush Limbaugh lose weight and put Howard Stern on the Disney Channel. The smark crowd stops him with a loud RODDY chant but Piper confirms the cage match for tonight, but with him as the referee for no apparent reason.

Hiroshi Tenzan/Masahiro Chono vs. High Voltage

The Japanese guys are IWGP Tag Team Champions and are in the Black and White. Robbie Rage gets jumped to start but Kaos comes in off the top with a clothesline to take down Chono. High Voltage clears the ring and we take a break. Yes, this match is getting a break. Back with Rage stomping on Tenzan and putting on a reverse chinlock. Tenzan fights up as the announcers talk about Goldberg being with his sick mom tonight.

Chono comes in off the tag and everything breaks down for a few moments. Things settle back down with Kaos blocking a Chono suplex until High Voltage comes in for a double team. Kaos’ top rope clothesline hits Rage by mistake, allowing Tenzan to drop a top rope headbutt for two. Not that it matters as the Mafia Kick ends Kaos seconds later.

Rating: F. I can’t stand these matches as we’re just supposed to instantly care about people we haven’t seen in months because they’re wearing NWO shirts. Yeah Chono and Tenzan are awesome, but we need more than a few matches a year for the fans to realize that. On top of that the match was horrible with everyone looking sloppy and the match being a big mess. Given what I’ve seen from both teams, I blame this pretty much entirely on High Voltage.

Still shots of Giant vs. Sting last night.

Here’s the Wolfpack to a BIG reaction. Nash talks about how life is full of ironies, such as the last man to join the Wolfpack is the first one to bring home some gold. He brings out Sting for his pick of the partners but Sting wants to suck up to the crowd first. Sting talks about how everyone in the group has credentials, ranging from Konnan coming from a bunch of tough barrios, Luger holding every title there is to hold and Nash being a living, breathing monster. Savage isn’t listed as a possibility for some reason. However, he’s going to wait until the tag title defense tonight to make his announcement.

Kanyon vs. Sick Boy

Kanyon charges to the ring and the brawl is quickly on. Sick Boy is stomped into the corner and punched a lot before Kanyon pulls him down with a neckbreaker for two. Kanyon heads to the floor where a Lodi (in a safari hat because he’s odd like that) distraction lets Sick Boy take over. Back in and Sick Boy goes up but hops down, allowing Kanyon to hit a great looking forward electric chair for two. A faceplant out of the corner puts Sick Boy down again before the Flatliner gets the pin.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to go anywhere but Kanyon continues to look awesome. His offense was so different from anyone else and he had a solid look, but for some reason he never reached that higher level. The feud with the Flock is working though and I’m curious to see where it goes.

Here are Rude and Hennig with Curt now in the Black and White like he should have been all along. Rude talks about how everyone has been asking why they turned on the Wolfpack and it’s the stereotypical answer: money. If it had been Hennig in there with Goldberg, the streak would be over. That’s going to be the case one day because Hennig has won over 3,000 matches. Hennig brags about swerving Konnan and promises no swerves with the Black and White, even though he’s now swerved DDP, Flair and Konnan. He’d never swerve Rude though.

JJ Dillon is here to address the Cruiserweight Title issues from last night. The referee was right to call the match last night so here’s Jericho, already in celebration mode. He sings about being the champion and says there’s dancing in the streets. JJ says Jericho is the champion, but he has to defend against Malenko within 30 days. Jericho rips into Dean’s dad again, but thankfully Dean was about two feet from Jericho to jump him immediately. Malenko beats him into the back and throws Jericho into anything he can find, ranging from what look to be portable bleachers to a cardboard box. Security finally breaks it up.

Chris Adams vs. The Giant

Giant is smoking again. This actually lasts longer than I expected, going a full 20 seconds before the chokeslam ends Adams.

We look at Hogan and Rodman attacking Page again last week.

Here are Hogan and Bischoff for their weekly (or hourly depending on the show) chat. Hogan says that God created Hollywood on the seventh day. Back in the day when he was selling out MSG, the slimy one (Nash?) was wishing he could be like Hogan one day. As for Page, if he wants a piece of himself and Rodman, come get some, even if it means bringing in Karl Malone. Hogan and Rodman have already signed for Bash at the Beach, so make sure to check the show out to see who Page and his partner take a beating. This was short and actually accomplished something. I’m as shocked as you are.

More Nitro Girls and the Nitro Party video.

Hour #3 begins.

Here’s Sting for his decision. He wastes no time and picks Nash. Tony calls this a curveball, even though it was one of four possible options. Nash does a survey of which NWO the fans are here to see, which sums up this company in a nutshell. Lastly, he says Hennig is the Pack’s newest prey.

Tag Titles: Sting/Kevin Nash vs. Harlem Heat

Tony gets the continuity wrong before the bell, saying Sting has been a tag champion for a long time, even though it was clearly stated the titles were vacant coming into last night. Booker and Sting get us going in the best possible pairing for this match. Things start fast with Sting jumping over Booker before taking him down with a hiptoss. Booker bails to the floor for a meeting with Stevie before coming back in with the jumping forearm.

Stevie yells at Booker so T brings him in to try his own luck. Ray stomps Sting down but he comes back with some of those odd shots to the face of his own, allowing for the tag off to Nash. Kev comes in but walks into a slam, only to have Stevie miss an elbow drop. We take a break and come back with Booker missing a dropkick on Sting. Back to Nash for knees in the corner and the big boot to the jaw before the side slam gets two.

Off to Sting again who stomps a mudhole on Booker before actually hitting his jumping elbow drop. A Vader Bomb of all things gets two but a regular splash hits Booker’s knees. Ash comes in before Booker can make the tag though, meaning the match slows down again. Nash powers Booker down but tags back out to Sting before he breaks a sweat. You have to protect that hair at all costs you see.

The Wolfpack keeps up the fast tags with Nash coming back in but Booker escapes Snake Eyes and gets two off a rollup. Booker avoids the Stinger Splash and finally makes the tag off to Stevie. Sting walks into a powerslam but Stevie talks trash, only to get caught in the Death Drop for the pin about 10 seconds after he was tagged in.

Rating: D+. Not a terrible match here and at least Stevie did the job instead of Booker. The match was pretty dull though with Nash seeming to be as bored as you could imagine him to be and Sting just going through the motions as well. Harlem Heat was done as a top tag team but they were still good enough for a spot like this.

The announcers talk about the cage match.

Remember that video of Scott Steiner on a movie set with Hogan where they met Carl Weathers? Well here it is again.

The cage is already set up but first we get Bischoff talking to Scott Steiner in a sitdown interview. Scott says it’s nice to be in New York but it’s nothing compared to Los Angeles. He name drops a bunch of actors who congratulated him for the snow job he put on his brother. Just establishing the new character for Steiner, which I can’t imagine lasts long.

Nitro Girls.

Randy Savage vs. Diamond Dallas Page

There’s a top on the cage and Piper is the referee. Page climbs on top of the cage to pose before getting inside. We get the bell and Page goes after Savage’s bad arm, only to have Randy hit him in the bad ribs. Page goes up top but gets crotched down, only to pop up and go after Savage’s own injured ribs. A ram into the cage gets two so Savage sends him into the steel for the same. They ram each other into the buckle before Savage goes head first into the cage.

Back up and they hit heads to put both guys on the mat again. We take a break and come back with Page pounding away and scoring with a clothesline, only to be taken down by a low blow. Savage goes up for the big elbow but hurts his knee on the way down, allowing Page to kick out. Savage and Piper get in a fight over the speed of the count with Savage laying him out via a piledriver. Page comes back with the Diamond Cutter to put all three guys down.

The fans (or the PA system) wants Goldberg as all three guys get back up. Page punches Piper for trying to pull him off Savage, so Piper sends Page into the cage three times in a row. Now Piper beats up Savage, because Heaven forbid a match doesn’t focus on Piper at least once. Piper rams both of them into the cage….and the cage raises up. Cue the Black and White to fill the cage which lowers after they get in. The massive beatdown is on as the match is thrown out.

Rating: D+. This was more about Piper than either wrestler and that’s a big problem in WCW at the moment. Piper is playing WAY too big of a role and I have no idea why WCW thinks he’s the right man for this spot. The match itself was nothing special as both guys were banged up and basically going through the motions out there until Piper did his thing.

The NWO destroys Savage with Bischoff kicking a chair into his knee. The Wolfpack comes out to try for a save but they can’t find a way in. Nash runs (work with me here) to the back and finds the button to raise the cage and we go off the air.

Overall Rating: C-. While not great, this was SO much better than last week as they kept things moving. Rather than focusing on one story, the show focused on different stories at different times which made things a lot easier to sit through. Hogan only having one promo and a run-in at the end is a great example of this as he had something like nine appearances last week. The wrestling was passable and the stories were advanced as well, which is all you can ask for a lot of the time.

 

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On This Day: November 4, 1996 – Monday Nitro: Two Old Guys Argue A Lot

Monday Nitro #60
Date: November 4, 1996
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Attendance: 7,568
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyszko

We’re into November now and World War 3 is in three weeks. Well 20 days but you get the idea. Ok so it’s really 15 years ago plus a few months but we’ll be here all day if we get into that. Anyway after last week, there’s not much to go on so hopefully we really get things going tonight. Let’s get to it.

Sting is in the rafters. DiBiase, Vincent and Giant are in the crowd and looking up at him.

Tonight we start a tournament for the new WCW Women’s Title.

Eric isn’t here tonight, but rather in Portland trying to get Piper to sign a contract. Remember that. It becomes REAL important in a few weeks.

We get a clip from Havoc where Piper yells at Hogan. Tony says the fans have demanded it, including over the internet. Tonight a word is promised about the signing.

Marcus Bagwell vs. Brad Armstrong

Sting leaves before the match starts. Man even he hates Buff. Riggs it at ringside too. Random question but where have the Steiners been? Are they still out from the car wreck thing? Bagwell does the clap thing and to his credit, the crowd is doing it with him. Technical match for the most part as they’re on the mat a lot. One thing that’s unrelated to the match: there are fans in the front row leaning over people (nice guys) to try to see themselves on a screen. I guess there are monitors or something by the entrance. That helps a lot as far as the videos they play.

We take a break (in the opener? Between Bagwell and Armstrong?) and come back to Armstrong hitting some armdrags (with his strong arms I guess) to frustrate Bagwell. Bagwell hits him in the face and the brawl is on. The fans are getting into this too. A dropkick puts Bagwell down and he gets tossed to the floor. Bagwell does just the same, hitting a dropkick and a clothesline to put Armstrong on the floor. There’s a dive to the floor and Brad is in trouble.

The NWO is in the crowd. They seem to be in the same place we saw them earlier so presumably they’ve been there the entire time. Why we’re looking at them and should be surprised to see them eludes me but a lot of what WCW did eluded me. Ok now they’re leaving. A tornado DDT gets two for Armstrong. There’s a gutbuster for Bagwell and what looked to be a forearm to put Armstrong down. We get the same ending from Fall Brawl 95 with Johnny B. Badd vs. Pillman where they both hit cross bodies and Bagwell lands on top for the pin.

Rating: C+. Marcus Bagwell vs. Brad Armstrong got 15 minutes and a commercial on Nitro and IT WAS GOOD. I’m in an alternate universe here. Brad was almost always at least watchable but Bagwell was a tag team guy and the same wrestler he was five years earlier, so why in the world did this get so much time? I’m not sure but it worked pretty well.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Ice Train

We’re reminded of the NWO watching Page last week. Page whispered something to Nick Patrick before this starts. The NWO (Outsiders) are in the crowd watching again. Train easily overpowers Page to start and knocks him to the floor. Page is starting to look a lot like he would during his main run. The Outsiders leave. Page guillotines him on the top and hits a top rope clothesline to take over.

Tony says Teddy has become a role model for young people all over the world. I can see the tag team matches being made on playgrounds all over the world. Sunset flip (and a bad one at that) gets two for Train. Larry says Piper vs. Hogan would be the biggest match of the 20th century. I never thought I’d say this, but Larry has been in bigger matches than that would be. Pancake puts Train down for two.

Swinging neckbreaker gets the same and a huge kickout, sending Page onto Patrick. A powerslam and two splashes get a slow two. Page gets knocked to the floor when the Outsiders come in and destroy Train with the title belts. Patrick is on the floor with Page. The champs leave and the Cutter ends this.

Rating: D+. This was more angle than match, which is something you can usually say about Teddy Long’s clients’ matches. It’s cool to see the Outsiders doing something to pull someone up and it certainly worked with Page. Was there a kayfabe reason why Patrick never went on medical leave? I never got that.

Cruiserweight Title: Dean Malenko vs. Scotty Riggs

Dean vs. Psicosis is announced for the PPV. The bell never rings so technically this is just a big prematch exhibition. Riggs has a bad shoulder coming in. Tony: “Well he’s trying to win. That’s a good sign.” Well what else would he be there for? A pottery class? Syxx pops up in the crowd as Riggs hits the post shoulder first. Riggs doesn’t seem to mind as he turns on the jets and sends Dean to the floor. There’s a plancha and back in a top rope double axe gets two. Scotty goes up again but Dean falls against the ropes and Riggs crashes onto the apron. Bagwell throws him back in and Dean gets an easy pin.

Rating: C. Not a bad match here and it foreshadows the troubles that the Males would have. Ok so maybe foreshadows is too big of a word given that they would only last like 3 weeks but you get the idea. Dean looked good here as did Riggs, and that ending fall looked awesome and painful at the same time. Decent little match.

We get a clip from last week with Mongo helping steal a win for Benoit.

Hector Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit

Hector is Eddie’s older brother and possibly even more talented. He’s also a dead ringer for Eddie if you just glance at him. I’ve often gotten them confused until I took a good look. Flair has had his surgery and Anderson is out with a back injury. On Saturday, Benoit said Sullivan is no longer the man he used to be. Sullivan pops up and says he’ll hurt Benoit in Baltimore. He’s actually talking about a house show.

Hector speeds things up and hits almost a Vader Bomb from the top rope out to the floor onto a standing Benoit. Benoit’s shoulder is still taped up. Hector works on the arm and mixes up the attack on it, because Hector Guerrero is smarter than most wrestlers. He goes to take the tape off and we take a break. After an NWO t-shirt ad, we come back to Benoit hitting a knee to put Guerrero down.

He draped Hector over the top rope with a release suplex and Guerrero is in trouble. Benoit works over the ribs and hooks an awkward abdominal stretch. Hector is basically crouched down and Benoit is bending over. Benoit hammers him down as Tony hypes up how amazing the second hour is. There’s the explosion. Hector grabs a small package for two. Guerrero speeds things up and uses a rolling tumbleweed style cradle for two. Woman breaks it up which isn’t a DQ. Benoit grabs a rollup via the distraction and uses the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C+. Another long match which again works. Benoit could move better this week which is a nice perk. Hector wouldn’t be around that much I don’t think so this was really just to avenge Eddie I guess. Nothing that great but they were moving well out there and the psychology worked so big points for that.

We look at Giant and Jarrett from last week. The Horsemen and Jarrett are in the aisle and Jeff says he’s the lead horse right now. Was he ever officially inducted? Benoit protests and says business pertaining to the Horsemen will be dealt with by a Horseman. Jarrett talks about getting WCW together as Sting watches. He just kind of goes on and on while we look at Sting.

The announcers talk about Sting.

Lee Marshall is in Florida for next week’s Nitro.

WCW Women’s Title Tournament First Round: Reina Jubuki vs. Madusa

Jubuki is Akiri Hokuto under a mask. Reina takes over quickly to start and chokes Madusa down. Another female Japanese wrestler comes out and watches. Her name is Zero apparently. Sonny Onoo rants like a heel Japanese man would in pro wrestling. Madusa hits something like what we would call the Stratusphere but Jubuki hits a release suplex and missile dropkick for two. The American grabs a quick German to pin the Japanese for the win. Too short to rate but it was way better than most modern female matches.

Michael Wallstreet vs. Chris Jericho

Wallstreet takes it to the mat quickly but Jericho works on the arm and then grabs a headlock. He tries to speed things up and Wallstreet fires him through the ropes. Tony calls the attorney of Nick Patrick a Schyster. I have a feeling there was a wink in there somewhere. Wallstreet pounds away as the announcers debate what the name Lionheart means.

Off to a chinlock and after awhile we look at the crowd. I can’t say I blame them as things got really boring all of a sudden there. Jericho comes back to break up the boring chants which were coming quickly. Missile dropkick sends Wallstreet out to the floor. Jericho gets sent into the post but as they come back in he grabs a quick small package for the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing special here at all but they didn’t have much to go on. Jericho needed the ring time at this point and putting him in there with a veteran like Wallstreet was a good idea. This wasn’t all that bad but it’s nothing interesting at all. Basically just a way to make sure people remember who Jericho is.

Patrick and his attorney are here again and Jericho says there’s nothing wrong with the neck and that Patrick works for the NWO. Somehow this turns into an argument about Jericho’s dad playing in the NHL. Teddy comes out to yell at Patrick too. The attorney brings up Teddy being suspended while he was a referee like 8 years ago. Jericho cuts him off and says that’s the past, what Patrick is doing today.

We get a video from last week with Luger chasing after Sting to end the match with Booker.

Lex Luger vs. Booker T

Before the match we get an inset promo from Luger saying he’ll be waiting for Sting whenever he’s ready to talk. Luger grabs a delayed vertical suplex to start and seems to be more focused than he was last week. An elbow puts Booker on the floor and we take a break. Tony promises that if anything happens during the break, we’ll see it on replay. There’s no replay, so I guess we can assume that they just stayed in the same place during the break.

Powerslam gets two for Lex. Booker grabs a release Stun Gun to take over. Lex gets thrown to the floor where he takes a kick to the ribs from Sherri. Booker works on the back out on the floor. Back in the ring a hooking kick puts Luger down again. Side kick results in Booker crotching himself and Lex makes his comeback. He hits a powerslam and calls for the Rack but Booker grabs the rope. There’s a side kick to take Luger down and Colonel Parker is here to hug Sherri. An enziguri puts Lex down but Parker gets on the apron for some reason. Booker yells at him so Luger rolls him up for the pin.

Rating: D. This was a chore to sit through. The problem basically was that I don’t think anyone thought Booker was going to get a decisive win here so it was just kind of waiting around until the end of the match. That’s a very boring kind of match to watch and I stopped this whenever I could to do ANYTHING else. It wasn’t bad but it was very uninteresting.

Sting is still watching.

Eric Bischoff calls in and says that things are going well with him and Piper, but there’s no match signed, due to attorneys and agents interfering. He won’t say what’s wrong but he’s going to talk to Piper in Toronto next week. This goes on for awhile. Remember this segment. It becomes very important later.

Remember last week where we saw part of the Hogan vs. Piper showdown from Halloween Havoc but it was clipped for time? Well here’s the FULL version! That eats up ten minutes.

Here’s the NWO to end the show. Hogan demands a spotlight so he feels like he’s in California. Here’s a clip from Santa With Muscles, as we’re actually playing the “my B-movie is better than YOUR B-movie” game between Piper and Hogan. Hogan, as Santa, beats up some goons/thieves in a mall. Back in the arena, Hogan talks about the Cable Ace Awards or something and threatens to come to the ceremony and steal Ted Turner’s award. Is there a point to this at all? Hogan says Piper is scared and hiding out with Savage somewhere. He poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Well it was better than last week due to the matches and wrestling being a lot better, but at the same time, nothing happened here. That’s the problem with having a main event like the big battle royal as everyone of note is in there and there might be a few other matches on there, most of which are just midcard matches. Things pick up speed soon enough though.

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On This Day: November 3, 2008 – Monday Night Raw: Raw Turns 800(ish)

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 3, 2008
Location: St. Pete Times Forum, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 12,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This is the REAL 800th episode, at least according to WWE and is a three hour show. It means I’m probably wrong about some of the previous centennial episodes but does it really matter? Anyway we have a big long card and a bunch of highlights from the first 799 episodes which I’m sure we haven’t seen a million times before. Oh and Batista defending against Jericho in a cage. Let’s get to it.

DX fights Miz/Morrison tonight.

Here’s Orton to open the show. He says to either fire Adamle as GM or he’s walking. Shane and Stephanie won’t fix things so he’s going to put a stop to it. If you think he’s bluffing, try him. Orton gets a chair and sits between the announce tables.

Hardys vs. The Brian Kendrick/MVP

Matt is ECW Champion and Jeff is about a month and a half from winning the WWE Title. We get a clip from Episode #764: Jeff diving off the tower onto Orton from earlier in the year. Jeff vs. MVP gets us going with not much at all. Off to Matt so the Hardys can screw up some basic stuff. Back to Jeff for Poetry in Motion as the fans aren’t that interested so far.

Off to Kendrick who jumps onto Jeff’s back and kicks away at it. Sliced Bread is countered and Jeff hits the sitout gordbuster and brings in Matt. Matt cleans house, knocking Kendrick to the floor and hitting the Side Effect on MVP for two. MVP gets a shot in and it’s off to Kendrick. The referee didn’t see it so while he’s being put out, the Twist and Swanton get the pin MVP.

Rating: D+. Pretty dull match here as I think the Hardys were there to give us some kind of a nostalgia feeling, but it doesn’t quite mean much when the team hasn’t meant anything in years at this point. Also the lack of doubt as to who wins here kind of hurt things too. Kendrick’s push started and stopped in about the course of a month.

We get a clip of the first episode where Heenan couldn’t get inside among other things.

The Kid beats Razor Ramon on Episode #17. That really was a huge deal.

Battle Royal

William Regal, Manu, JTG, Shad Gaspar, Cody Rhodes, Jamie Noble, Snitsky, Ted DiBiase Jr.

Orton is still at ringside. The winner gets an IC Title match next week. Santino is on commentary as he’s champion. He declares himself champion of the world as this match is going nowhere. Snitsky the Bald is sent out by all three members of Priceless, but DiBiase throws out Manu and Rhodes in a nice move. Regal and Noble go to the floor but not over the top. Oh ok Noble is out. We have Cryme Tyme, Regal and DiBiase left. DiBiase fights the tag team and throws out JTG. Shad misses a boot so Ted can toss him, but Regal sneaks in to throw out Teddy for the win and the title shot, which I think he would win.

Rating: D-. Really boring match here with an ending that you’ve seen a million times before. Well you’ve probably not seen a million battle royals but you get the idea. Still though, boring match and it was about as cheap of a way as you could get to give Regal the title shot. Nothing else to say here.

Shane and Stephanie arrive. Stephanie says Shane can handle this, referring to Orton I think.

Episode #409: Vince buys WCW but Shane steals it from under him. Still a huge moment, still amazing how much they screwed that up.

Orton is in the ring again and talks about how Adamle slapped him in the face. Therefore, either Adamle goes, or Orton goes. Cue the dancing McMahon who says he doesn’t appreciate this. Orton says that Vince would get this done immediately. Shane says he’s not his father but they have the same last name. Cue Adamle who says everyone in charge of Raw has always had an agenda. He wanted to be the first unbiased GM, but unfortunately that hasn’t been happening. Therefore, he’s quitting, and also drawing the biggest pop of the night.

Orton however wants an apology still. Shane says Orton should apologize to Adamle. Orton has had an excuse of a bad shoulder lately, but Shane thought Orton looked fine at Cyber Sunday. Shane thought something was up so he went to Orton’s doctors, who said that Orton has been cleared to compete for months. Orton doesn’t want to come back until Survivor Series, but Shane thinks it should be tonight. Randy says he doesn’t have his gear, but Shane says he’ll take care of that. It’s Orton vs. Punk tonight.

Senator Barack Obama asks if you know what he’s cooking. Senator John McCain wants to know if you know what he’s cooking.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Charlie Haas

This is during Charlie’s imitation period so he’s Bret the Hitman Haas here. He even cuts a quick promo but the voice doesn’t work at all. The fans didn’t screw Vladimir at Cyber Sunday. Vlad screwed Vlad. Boot to the chest, suplex, headbutt, pin in 25 seconds.

After a clip of Batista winning the title at Cyber Sunday, Big Dave says he’ll keep the title tonight.

Episode #257: DX invades WCW. HUGE moment here.

D-Generation X vs. John Morrison/The Miz

HHH is WWE Champion. DX does their intro and we get a clip from ECW where Miz/Morrison made fun of them for being old and then beat up some DX impersonators. Shawn points out that the impersonator has a huge nose. Maybe Shawn just got used to it over the years but THAT THING IS HUGE! They also mocked his chaps. You can punch his wife, you can spit in his face, BUT NO ONE MOCKS THE CHAPS!

HHH points out them making fun of Shawn for losing his hair. Shawn doesn’t remember this. HHH: “Well I’m pretty sure…” Shawn: “No they didn’t.” HHH: “Shawn I’m sure…” Shawn: “Drop it!” HHH: Well ok….” Shawn: “WE WILL NEVER SPEAK OF THIS AGAIN!” HHH makes fun of Miz/Morrison’s high school pictures. Miz looks like a horse and Morrison enjoys rest stop sex. Shawn says he’s ready, the fans say they’re ready, we get a clip of Big Dick Johnson giving Miz a lap dance for some reason which traumatizes Shawn, and now we get to the DX intro, complete with more gay jokes from the Game. Funny stuff.

Oh yeah we have a match to get to. This is joined in progress with Morrison getting two on HHH. HHH takes his head off with a clothesline and it’s a double tag. Shawn knocks Miz down and hits the elbow to set up the Kick. Morrison breaks that up and Miz takes over via a clothesline. Miz whips Shawn into the corner where Shawn flips, followed by Miz’s corner clothesline.

Morrison comes in and pokes Shawn in the eye so Shawn kicks him in the head. Off to HHH who cleans house with the knees to the face. Facebuster looks to set up the Pedigree on Morrison but Miz breaks it up, only to walk into the spinebuster. Morrison imitates Shawn with a forearm, nipup and then tuning up the band, with the kick connecting on HHH. Miz and Morrison do crotch chops and Miz loads up a Pedigree, which is easily countered. Shawn kicks Miz’s head off and the Pedigree ends this.

Rating: C+. Not a bad match at all as Miz/Morrison got to show off a bit here. There was never any doubt as to who would win as the non-degerates didn’t mean much yet. Seeing them imitate DX’s stuff was good though and that’s what popped the fans for the most part. Fun little match.

JBL is with Shane and says he should be the new GM. Shane says he’ll think about it and has an idea about putting JBL in a match tonight. JBL thinks he means making the cage match a triple threat for the title, but Shane says it’s against the Undertaker.

Episode #243: Mike Tyson is here. Another HUGE moment.

Face Diva Team vs. Heel Diva Team

It’s a sixteen Diva tag. Do you really think I’m listing off all of them in what’s going to be a two minute match at longest? There are only seven good Divas so here’s Mae Young to be #8. Beth pounds on Kelly to start but Kelly uses her screaming headscissors, which is her only offense three and a half years later. Here’s Mae and Beth sells WAY too much for her. She knocks down everyone but falls down. A brawl breaks out and Beth rolls up Mae for the pin. As usual, three girls were in the match. If I remember right Mae was legit hurt in this.

Smackdown ReBound of the casket match with Taker vs…..Chavo Guerrero? Big Show interfered but Taker won anyway.

Episode #456: Rock challenges Hogan.

CM Punk vs. Randy Orton

Punk and Kofi are tag champions here in a reign I don’t think anyone remembers. This is as a result of Orton punting Punk at Unforgiven and costing him the world title, which somehow wouldn’t have a proper blowoff match until 2011. Punk takes him into the corner to start but Orton pounds him right back down. Here’s the Orton Stomp and a knee drop for two. Off to a chinlock which is broken up quickly. Punk avoids a charge in the corner and hits the springboard clothesline. Orton comes back with a clothesline in the corner and loads up the RKO…and here’s DiBiase for the DQ. Too short to rate.

DiBiase pounds on Punk and Orton punts DiBiase all the way into The Marine 2. Ted gets stretchered out.

Rhodes and Manu yell at Randy about it and Randy says if you have a problem do something about it right now. No one moves.

Episode #772: Floyd Mayweather is thrown over the top. This wasn’t exactly what I’d call a huge moment.

Stephanie is looking very good in her office when Adamle comes in. He says he’s leaving because she micromanages. Stephanie says being in charge is her birthright. He leaves and Shane comes in. He has a major announcement about Survivor Series but he won’t tell her.

Episode #475: Undertaker vs. Jeff Hardy in a ladder match for the title.

Here’s JR to call the next match and probably the rest of the show. Unfortunately it’s him and Tazz instead of him and Jerry like it should be.

Undertaker vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Taker grabs a headlock to start and hits a quick Old School. JBL shoulders him down and punches Taker in the corner. That doesn’t last long as the punching comes from Undertaker now, followed by a big boot and legdrop. The chokeslam hits and Taker does the throat slit. JBL escapes the tombstone and they collide with JBL falling to the floor. John looks to get back in but Taker sits up, so JBL bails for a countout for another short match.

JBL tries to walk out but Shawn throws him back in for a tombstone.

Jericho comes in to see Shane and the announcement is that the winner of Batista vs. Jericho gets to defend against the returning Cena at Survivor Series in Boston.

Episode #304: Ausitn and the beer truck.

Here’s Kung Fu Naki for a demonstration in the ring. Ok so I have his song on my iPod. Sue me. Horny comes in to dance with him. Boogeyman comes in to terrorize them and dances a bit too. Goldust, Jesse, Festus, Hacksaw, Slaughter, Lillian, Dusty, Cole and King all get in and dance too. Why is this happening? Oh ok, it’s so Ron Simmons can get a line in.

Episode #775: Flair retires. I can’t watch that anymore.

Episode #630: Edge and Lita’s wedding.

Kofi Kingston/Rey Mysterio vs. Mark Henry/Kane

Kofi is a tag champion with Punk but for some reason he’s in this match instead. Rey vs. Kane to start and It hink you can figure out what’s going on here: Mysterio moves around a lot and gets in a few shots but Kane runs him over. Off to Henry who runs him over even more. A splash misses and here’s the tag to Kofi. His kicks don’t do anything as Henry just throws him around. Kofi manages to get in a shot to send Henry to the corner and he knocks Kane off the apron. Henry gets tired of being on defense and catches a top rope cross body in the World’s Strongest Slam for the pin. Basically a squash.

Kane throws Mysterio out…and here’s Khali. He chops down both other monsters and Rey’s music plays for some reason.

Video on Raw being a longer running show than ANYTHING, except for World Championship Wrestling on Saturday Night which ran over 20 years without missing a week but we don’t count that because it makes us sound bad.

Video on Cena, who is coming back at Survivor Series. It’s kind of a career retrospective.

Shane and Stephanie say nothing of note.

Episode #761: Tribute to the Troops 2008.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. Chris Jericho

Batista won the title at Cyber Sunday, 8 days earlier. Pin, submission or escape as usual. Jericho charges straight at him which goes about as well as anyone else charging straight at Batista goes. He tries to run over the top but Batista catches him and hits a suplex followed by a clothesline for two. Jericho gets rammed into the cage and screams in pain. Or is it laughter? He’s always been a complicated guy. Batista rams him into the steel again and we take a break.

Back with Jericho hooking the Walls of Jericho on the apparent injured knee of Batista. There’s some tape on there but you would have to know to look for it. Batista kicks him off but he kicks him to the door so Batista has to make a diving save. They fight near the open door and in a smart move, Jericho throws Batista’s leg out the door so he can slam the door on it. Nice move.

We’re told that the knee injury too place at Cyber Sunday. That makes sense. Back in the middle of the ring Batista hits a spinning Bossman Slam for two. Jericho goes right back for the knee and loads up the Codebreaker, but Batista rams him into the cage instead. A spear misses though and Batista is right back down after hitting cage. Jericho goes up to escape but climbs down in front of the door which Batista throws open and pulls him back in. That was creative.

Spinebuster puts Jericho down but the Batista Bomb is countered as Jericho grabs the cage and tries to climb out again. Batista manages to throw him off but gets crotched to put both guys down. They go up again and Jericho almost gets caught in a top rope Batista Bomb. He manages to pull something off the cage and rams it into Batista’s head which allows him to get over the top. Batista grabs the top of Chris’ head but can’t stop him and Jericho wins the title.

Rating: B. I liked this a lot more than the Edge vs. Cena cage match that I did recently. The best part here was that they actually came up with some creative spots and we got a surprise ending. Why they gave Batista an 8 day reign is a little unclear but I’d assume it was so they could give us a surprise here, which is fine. Good main event.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this show but it wasn’t great. The problem was that they didn’t seem sure if they wanted to do a regular show with nostalgia thrown in or vice versa which makes the show feel uneven. It’s entertaining enough though and that’s the important idea. Coupling that with a good main event and the show is definitely more good than bad, but it’s not a great show or anything.

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Thunder – June 4, 1998: One Stacked B Show

Thunder
Date: June 4, 1998
Location: Peoria Civic Center, Peoria, Illinois
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Lee Marshall, Tony Schiavone

After Monday we have a major development in the form of Sting joining the Wolfpack as pretty much everyone figured he would. It really doesn’t change anything as WCW is just standing on the sidelines while the NWO civil war continues. Hopefully we get some of the Great American Bash card filled in tonight as the show is in ten days. Let’s get to it.

We open with the required recap of Sting joining the Wolfpack from Monday.

The announcers talk about the jump a bit.

Chris Benoit vs. Booker T

This is match #5 in the best of seven series for a TV Title shot at the Great American Bash with Benoit leading 3-1. They trade hammerlocks to start until Booker elbows him in the back to take over. A high side kick is good for two and the ax kick gets the same for Booker. Mr. T. stomps away in the corner but he whips Benoit in, only to be caught in the rolling Germans to give Benoit control.

A big back elbow to the face puts Booker down again and the Swan Dive connects for two. Stevie Ray is back at ringside to cheer his brother on. Benoit can’t get the Crossface and gets taken down by a spinwheel kick to the face. Booker hits a spinebuster and spins up, only to have his head taken off by a hard clothesline. Benoit makes the mistake of jawing with Stevie though and turns into the missile dropkick to close the gap to 3-2.

Rating: C+. As usual with this series, the matches are entertaining but they’re running out of new things to do. It also doesn’t help that with the series at 3-1, the endings to the next two matches are pretty obvious. On the other hand though, these have been by far the best matches on the shows almost every single night so they’re hardly a bad thing.

Here’s Giant with both tag belts and something to say. He doesn’t mind Sting joining the Wolfpack but thinks black and white would have looked better. However, he can’t live with being bodyslammed on national television like Sting did to him three days ago. Giant feels he should be able to pick a partner to be the tag team champions so here’s Brian Adams, apparently the new partner. Adams demands praise and says they won’t duck anyone as champions. Giant issues a challenge to Luger and anyone he can find to a tag title match tonight. I still want to know what Adams has on WCW to get this push.

Reese vs. Van Hammer

Reese shoves Hammer into the corner but Hammer shoves right back to frustrate the bigger man. Hammer slugs him into the corner but Reese comes back by just lifting Hammer into the air and dropping him down to the mat. A vertical suplex gets two on Hammer and for the first time ever, Lee Marshall has an interesting idea: could Lodi’s nonsensical signs be codes from Raven for what he wants the Flock to do? Hammer clotheslines Reese down but Horace blasts him in the back of the head, giving Reese the pin via a chokebomb.

Rating: D. Just a battle of the big men here as the Flock continues to spin its wheels. Reese was actually bigger than the Giant but is a great example of size not making a great wrestler. He’s not bad but there’s nothing more to him other than his size and that’s why he never went anywhere.

Post match the Flock beats down Hammer until Juventud Guerrera makes the save. He clears the ring until there’s just Reese left. Hammer gets Juvy out of the ring before he gets squashed like a grape.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Alex Wright

Before the match Eddie tells Chavo that Grandma has said to take time off and cool down, so Chavo needs to leave for a few months. Alex jumps Eddie to start but here’s crazy Chavo a few seconds in. Wright immediately throws him to the floor but the referee calls for the bell anyway. The match was maybe 30 seconds.

Chavo stalks Eddie to the back and Wright dances a bit.

Here’s Luger with something to say. Apparently there’s no point to the survey because this is clearly a Wolfpack town (based on how quiet the fans are I’d hate to see them in enemy territory). Luger has been named head of recruiting for the Wolfpack after all his success with Sting. The challenge is accepted for tonight and Luger names DDP as his partner, saying he has a Wolfpack shirt for Page too.

TV Title: Fit Finlay vs. Psychosis

Psychosis tries to slide between Finlay’s legs but accidentally dropkicks him in the knee in a painful looking botch. Finlay comes right back with some hard forearms to the back as the match immediately slows down. Psychosis is dropped throat first on the top rope and the fans are already chanting boring because the idea of a slow paced match doesn’t work for them. We hit a LONG chinlock and now the chants are justified. Psychosis finally fights up and tries to get some offense going, including a top rope Frankensteiner for two. Not that it matters though as Finlay picks him up and tombstones him to retain.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t as bad as the fans thought it was, but it still wasn’t anything really worth seeing. The chinlock hurt it a lot and cutting this down by a minute or so would have helped a lot. Finlay probably won’t hold the title much longer as I can’t imagine the winner of the series not taking the title from him.

Clips of Sting being recruited by and joining the Wolfpack on Monday.

Glacier vs. Saturn

Glacier does his full entrance but as he’s warming up, Saturn comes in behind him and hits a sick German suplex for two. Ice boy bails to the floor but Saturn hits a great looking plancha to take him down again. Back in and Glacier gets a boot up in the corner followed by some rapid kicks to the stomach. Saturn crotches him on the top and hits a middle rope http://onhealthy.net/product-category/mens-health/ suplex, meaning he was in the middle of the rope rather than the corner. A Lodi distraction lets Saturn superkick Glacier down but the referee goes down in the process. Cue Kanyon dressed as a referee with a Downward Spiral to Saturn. Glacier hits the superkick for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was mainly advancing the story between Kanyon and Saturn, which is further proof that Glacier’s whining about kicks isn’t needed at all. Saturn looked good with his high impact offense and Kanyon was an offensive genius so he was his usual entertaining self. Still though, Glacier gets on nerves as always.

Here’s Hennig to ask the fans if they like Goldberg. Obviously they do, but surprisingly enough they seem pleased with the idea of Curt beating him up at the PPV. Unfortunately Curt’s knee won’t be healed by then so Konnan will be getting Hennig’s US Title shot, as long as Konnan gives Curt the first shot.

Cruiserweight Title: Dean Malenko vs. Silver King

Dean easily takes him down to the mat in a headlock before shifting over to another variation of one. Silver King fights up and chops away, only to get caught in a suplex. Dean takes him to the corner but here’s Jericho with a book. He rings the bell and apparently that’s enough to throw the match out. Those referees are trigger happy tonight.

Jericho says this is an NWA rule book from 1934 that he found in the Library of Congress. Apparently the Strangler Lewis Rule states that the champion can refuse to face anyone and since Jericho never agreed to wrestle Dean, JJ needs to come down here right now and vacate the title. When that fails completely, Jericho tells Dean to stop dishonoring his dead pappy and give him the belt right now. The belt goes upside Jericho’s head, sending him to the floor, swearing vengeance.

Raven vs. Disco Inferno

Raven charges right into the corner to stomp Disco down before raking his face. Disco gets an elbow up in the corner before choking Raven with wrist tape. A swinging neckbreaker gets two for Inferno but Raven easily sends him to the floor. Disco is sent into the steps and Raven sends both him and a chair back into the ring. Disco blocks a hiptoss and sends Raven face first into the chair before stomping a mudhole in the corner. Raven comes right back with the drop toehold into the chair and the Even Flow ends this easily.

Post match Raven calls out Kanyon for a one on one showdown, even laying down on his back to give Kanyon an advantage.

Before the next match, Tony acknowledges the passing of Junkyard Dog the previous Tuesday. Glad they worked that in after 90 minutes.

US Title: Goldberg vs. Hugh Morrus

The announcers aren’t sure if Goldberg can use his power on someone like Morrus, because WCW announcers have the memories of banana slugs. Morrus jumps Goldberg to start but the champion pulls in Barbarian to make himself break a sweat. Jimmy Hart is thrown at both guys and a double spear puts them down. Barbarian and Morrus both get Jackhammers to make Goldberg 95-0.

Tag Titles: Giant/Brian Adams vs. Lex Luger/Diamond Dallas Page

We’re not sure if Page is going to accept the offer to join Luger or not but here he is with limited drama, albeit to his own music in a separate entrance from Luger. Page doesn’t have taped up ribs anymore. Heenan brings up a good point: neither of these teams have ever teamed together or at least not in a very long time yet they’re fighting for the tag titles. Tenay uses this as an opportunity to talk about the tag match at Great American Bash because why would a title match here and now be more important than a non-title match ten days from now?

Luger shoves Adams into the ropes to start and clotheslines him down before tagging in Page for a big reaction. A belly to belly suplex gets two for Page and it’s back to the arm. Back to Luger for a hiptoss as Tony says he doesn’t think Page would have come out here if a member of the Wolfpack had come out here, because apparently Tony doesn’t remember Luger is in the group. Luger misses a charge in the corner and it’s off to Giant to stand on his chest.

A Russian legsweep puts Luger down again and it’s back to Adams for a rake to the eyes and a legdrop for two. Back to Giant to throw Luger around with ease and plant him with a slam. Adams comes back in with a bearhug and a backbreaker before bringing Giant in again. The big man misses an elbow drop and it’s back to DDP via the hot tag. Page cleans house but Giant breaks up a Diamond Cutter attempt on Adams. Sting comes out to distract Giant, allowing Page to Diamond Cut Adams for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C-. This actually wasn’t terrible as they worked a basic formula and didn’t have the insanity that most WCW matches have. Luger and Page worked well enough together out there and Giant was his usual self. Adams was fine as a generic power guy which is all he ever should have been. Not bad here.

Not that it matters though as JJ calls in and says the title change doesn’t count because Giant had no authority to make Adams his partner. Therefore at the Bash, it’s Giant vs. Sting with the winner getting both belts and the right to pick his new championship partner.

Overall Rating: C+. This was the best Thunder they’ve had in months. The lack of main event guys until the last match gave everyone else a chance to shine and we actually got storyline development on top of the watchable matches. On top of that, every match seemed to have a purpose, with an insane FOUR title matches on the B show. Good stuff here actually.

 

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On This Day: October 23, 2000 – Monday Night Raw: When “Creative Has Nothing For You” Were Bad Words

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 23, 2000
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after No Mercy and the big story is Kurt Angle shocked the world by beating Rock to become the new WWF Champion. Angle has only been around for about a year at this point and is still a goofy character so this was a pretty big surprise. Other than that Austin didn’t quite get his revenge on Rikishi for nearly killing him eleven months prior but you know that’s not over. Let’s get to it.

We open with an In Memory graphic for Yokozuna. Ignore them incorrectly listing him as a three time world champion.

Here’s a bandaged up Rikishi to open things up. He wants to know where Steve Austin is despite knowing that Austin was arrested for trying to crush Rikishi with a car last night. Rikishi talks about the crime that was committed last night but he’s talking about Rock losing the WWF Title. Rikishi was down there to help Rock and even though they lost the battle last night, they’ll win the war. He asks Rock to come down here to hear what Rikishi has to say so here’s the Brahma Bull.

Rikishi apologizes for last night and that he didn’t mean for Rock to lose the title. Rock says that the two for them have done a lot together over the years, but Rock wants nothing to do with him or his apology. Not that it matters as Rock will be the WWF Champion again on his own, meaning without Rikishi’s help. Rikishi understands that Rock is upset, but he’s starting to hurt the big man’s feelings.

That doesn’t really sway Rock who says Rikishi can wipe himself with his feelings. Rock talks about Rikishi having a stomach ache from eating so many hamburgers and hot dogs and suggests Rikishi leave for good. Rikishi says he’ll be there for Rock whether he likes it or not, so Rock says he has to do what he has to do. A Rock Bottom lays the fat man out.

Trish pitches a Women’s Title match against Lita if it’s under bra and panties rules. Commissioner Mick Foley goes over the rules and accepts the idea.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Trish Stratus

Lita is defending and remember that this is bra and panties. Lita tackles her down to start and takes it into the corner before this becomes a catfight. This is about two years before Trish was even remotely good in the ring so this isn’t going to be anything more than what you would expect. Trish rips off Lita’s top so Lita does the same to Trish. The champ is about to fall out of her top before suplexing Trish down, hitting the moonsault and completing the stripping to retain.

This brings out the furious Right to Censor to complain about how bad women like Lita and Trish are for America. Steven Richards brings out the newest member of the RTC: Ivory, dressed in something a Puritan would find too conservative. She’s in a white collared blouse and a long black skirt while ranting about the clothing women wear today being too revealing. Trish laughs the ideas off and we’ve got a new monster heel Diva.

Michael Cole is in the back with the new WWF Tag Team Champions, Los Conquistadors. This is a little complicated but I’ll get to the explanation later. Anyway, Edge and Christian come up to them to congratulate them on their win and prove that they’re two different teams. Remember that, as it becomes important later.

Here’s Benoit with something to say. He’s noticed that talent, will and determination are useless. Being the best technical wrestler in the world today doesn’t mean a thing. HHH may have beaten him last night but the only game that won last night was HHH getting help from his wife last night. Starting tonight, things are different because no one and nothing will stop him because his time is now. Prove him wrong.

Chris Benoit vs. Road Dogg

Benoit drives him into the corner to start and stomps Roadie down with ease. A backbreaker gets two but Benoit misses the swan dive, allowing Road Dogg to hit a few left hands. Dean Malenko comes out for a distraction though and the Crossface gets a quick submission. Basically a squash.

Cole tells Rikishi that no one wants him here but he says he’ll be here all night no matter who likes it.

HHH doesn’t like that people thought his era was over. Last night he proved Benoit wrong by showing he’s a better technical wrestler than Benoit is. Coach asks HHH about Stephanie helping Angle win the WWF Title last night but HHH says that’s his own business. However, Angle put Stephanie in harm’s way, so now it’s time for HHH to take it out on Angle.

We get a clip from last night of Austin trying to run over Rikishi and getting arrested last night.

Crash is in charge of the APA’s office while they’re out hurt. Test and Albert come in and kick him out.

Jericho gives a stagehand a Fozzie CD and plugs an upcoming performance on Heat. He turns around and spills his coffee on Kane, saying he hopes he didn’t burn him. You don’t talk about burning Kane and the Canadian is destroyed.

European Champion William Regal is in the ring and calls most of the fans uncivilized. He’s in the capitol of Connecticut which produces more handguns which kill more people than any other stage. Cue Jericho to interrupt, apparently not dead at Kane’s hands. He does have a bad left arm though.

European Title: Chris Jericho vs. William Regal

Jericho gets the mic to insult Regal but decides Willy isn’t worth it and charges in to get us going. The bell rings and Jericho fires off chops followed by a spinwheel kick and a clothesline for two. Regal avoids a charge to send Jericho shoulder first into the post and gets two of his own off a spinning powerbomb. A tiger bomb is countered into a suplex by Jericho but Regal goes after the bad arm to take him down. They slug it out a bit but Regal blocks a clothesline by going after the arm again. Regal loads up a neckbreaker but the not very nice Jericho kicks Regal low. There’s the Lionsault but Kane comes in for the DQ.

Kane lays out Jericho with a chokeslam and lights up the corners of the ring.

T&A (Test and Albert) can’t figure out how the initials for Test and Albert Protection Agency should be spelled.

Stephanie and Angle arrive and are greeted by paparazzi.

Here are Stephanie and Kurt for their first public appearance with the title. Stephanie gives him a long winded (I’m as shocked as you are) intro before confetti and balloons rain from the ceiling. The balloons are popped as Angle talks about how America is falling apart. For most people it’s overcoming poverty but for most people here it’s about overcoming being born in Hartford, like Stephanie has done. Angle brags about winning the gold medal in Atlanta but that wasn’t enough for him. Most people would just give up, but he’s not most people.

Four years later (it was three) he came to the WWF and now he’s proven that he’s the best in this company as well. Two months after he got here, he won the European Title and tourism grew by 38% in Europe. We get an over the top highlight package with Angle narrating. He won the Intercontinental Title two months later, becoming the first Eurocontinental Champion in history. “Well except for D’Lo Brown who doesn’t count.” Then he won King of the Ring, sending sales of crowns and scepters up an amazing 40%.

Last night was the crowning achievement though by winning the WWF Title. Angle’s rookie year really is incredible and I can’t think of a better one in wrestling history. Angle has a poem for us called What Makes A Guy Super Great. He gets about two lines down until Foley interrupts. JR: “THANK GOD!” Mick asks for an ovation for Angle on his title win, but says there’s something he didn’t get last night: a celebratory hug.

Stephanie was unable to give him one due to being unconscious from a Rock Bottom. Mick is one heck of a hugger, so he’d be willing to offer his services. Foley gets all teary eyed and announces Angle’s first title defense……….right here in Hartford, Connecticut….against HHH and the Rock in a triple threat. Awesome segment here with Angle at his very best. Goofy Angle is one of my favorite characters ever and this was some of his best work.

Chyna goes looking for Eddie but finds the two women she caught him in the shower with last week. She shuts the door and a lot of violence can be heard. Chyna leaves and the bodies are shown laid out everywhere. One of those girls is Victoria/Tara.

Too Cool vs. Tazz/Raven

Tazz and Raven formed a short lived ECW tag team around this point because there was nothing else for them to do. Scotty kicks Raven in the face to start and Grandmaster adds a middle rope dropkick to take Bird Boy down again. Tazz walks into a powerslam and Raven is kicked out to the floor. The distraction lets Tazz suplex Grandmaster down and the heels take over.

Raven bulldogs him down for two and it’s already back to Tazz as the announcers ignore the match to talk about a cookbook. Raven jumps into a boot to the face and it’s off to Scotty to speed things up. A superkick gets two on Tazz and everything breaks down. Raven accidentally hits Tazz and Grandmaster hits Raven with the guillotine legdrop. Tazz makes the save and Raven returns the favor by breaking up Worm with a DDT to Scotty for the pin.

Rating: D. Just a match here really and as basic as you could ever get. Just throwing people together into a team because they used to work for another company doesn’t really work that well. They wouldn’t o anywhere as a team as there’s just nothing interesting about them together.

Christian isn’t sure which glasses to wear in the match tonight. Pete Gas from the Mean Street Posse of all people comes in and asks to see Edge.

After a break Edge comes back into his dressing room and finds the place wrecked and Christian put through a table. Apparently the Dudleys attacked him and injured his shoulder. Edge says it’s just Los Conquistadors so he’ll win the titles himself.

Billy Gunn vs. Val Venis

Chyna is with Billy here so Eddie comes out before the match. Billy stops her from killing him, allowing Val to jump the Gunn (I’m here all week) and get things going early. A knee drop gets two for Venis and he peppers Billy with forearms. Billy grabs a quickly broken sleeper but gets countered into a blue thunder bomb for two. They clothesline each other down before Billy hits a Stinger Splash and a Jackhammer, only to have Steven Richards break up a Fameasser. Richards is pulled in for a bit but the Fameasser hits for the pin anyway.

Rating: D. Why Billy Gunn kept getting pushed is beyond me. He was athletic but there are some people that just don’t work as a singles guy. Billy just didn’t have it, but I’d be curious to know how much of that is because of his nickname. You can only get so far with his name and gimmick and he crashed into that ceiling far before this.

Stephanie isn’t sure whose corner she should be in tonight. She asks HHH what he wants but he says he just wants her safe.

Video on Jerry Lawler at Las Vegas Outlaws cheerleader tryouts. I think you can figure this one out.

Tag Titles: Edge vs. Los Conquistadors

Edge looks confused as the champions come to the ring. We’ll say Uno starts but is easily punched down. Uno grabs a quick small package for two and Edge is furious. Los Conquistadors both come in and hit Poetry in Motion as the fans suddenly get it. A Twist of Fate and the Swaton connect for the pin to retain the titles.

Post match the champions of course unmask as the Hardys. Cue Mick Foley to wonder how the Hardys can be the Conquistdors when they wrestled the Conquistadors last night. Foley has some footage from earlier which shows Edge and Christian admitting they were in the Conquistadors costumes last night. The problem with that is Edge and Christian weren’t allowed to challenge for the tag titles, but since they fooled him, the tag title change from last night stands. Unfortunately for Edge and Christian, tonight’s title change (there was a change?) stands as well, meaning the Hardys are YOUR Tag Team Champions.

Rikishi tells Cole to tell Rock that he’s helping him get the title back.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. HHH vs. Kurt Angle

Stephanie is in the back with Kurt and tells him to wait before going to the ring since he’s the champ. He finally gets in and the challengers both deck him in the face for making them wait. Kurt clotheslines HHH down but celebrates too long, allowing Rock to drop him with a clothesline of his own. HHH is knocked to the floor and Kurt pounds away on Rock in the corner while he has a chance. Rock comes back with a quick Samoan drop but HHH dives in for the save.

Now it’s Rock being sent to the floor to give us another mini-match. HHH stomps the champion down in the corner and gets two of his own off a neckbreaker. Angle comes back with a gorgeous German suplex but Rock pulls him out to the floor. Everyone goes outside and Rock and HHH get into a contest to see who can slam Kurt head first into the announce table the hardest. Stephanie tries to break it up so Rock stares her down, causing HHH to get in Rock’s face. Angle has the ring bell but Rock ducks and HHH gets blasted in the side of the head instead.

That leaves Rock vs. Kurt in the ring for a bit with Rock hitting a DDT but the referee is checking on the Game. Kurt suplexes Rock down for the same result as a stretcher is brought out for HHH. Angle hits the Olympic Slam out of nowhere and Hebner FINALLY slides back in to count two. HHH gets off the stretcher and stumbles back to the ring for a quick Pedigree on Kurt. Rock saves and clotheslines HHH down before hitting a Rock Bottom on the champion. This time it’s HHH with the save but Angle breaks up a Pedigree with a belt shot to the face. Rikishi comes out to beat up Angle and that’s a DQ somehow.

Rating: C+. This picked up at the halfway point but why did we have a DQ when Rikishi came in but not for a bell or title shot to HHH’s head? Either way, good stuff here as Angle fits this role perfectly: the guy who isn’t all there at times but can be a killer in the ring. Good stuff here.

Post match here’s Austin to go after Rikishi. He clotheslines Angle on the way down the ramp before pounding away on Rikishi, only to have Kurt come back in to go after Austin for the clothesline. I like that as it’s better than just having Angle come in for no apparent reason. Rikishi escapes and a Stunner to Angle ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. The key difference between today’s shows and this episode is how many different ideas there were back in 2000. You don’t see the same finishes or repetitive matches or the same stories being used over and over again until we get to a PPV to shake things up. There’s an idea to everything going on and instead of using a batch of jobbers over and over again, you get some fresh matches. It makes the show WAY easier to sit through and far more enjoyable as a result.

 

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Monday Nitro – June 1, 1998: Sting, Will You Accept This T-Shirt?

Monday Nitro #139
Date: June 1, 1998
Location: MCI Center, Washington D.C.
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay

We’re less than two weeks to go from the Great American Bash and we really don’t know much about the card so far. The main event will be Hart/Hogan vs. Savage/Piper, but the interesting (by comparison) question is what happens to Sting and the tag titles. Odds are Sting is going to pick a side soon, but that doesn’t really do much overall. It’s just more of the same faction wars which have dominated the company for months now. Let’s get to it.

We open with a montage of Sting over the years and all of his different looks.

Opening sequence.

The announcers talk about Sting for a few minutes and Tony is sure we’ll get the decision tonight.

A white limo with a WCW logo pulls up and it’s JJ Dillon, Diamond Dallas Page, Booker T and Goldberg.

We see Luger’s recruitment speech to Sting from Thunder.

The fireworks display kills even more time after a break.

Nitro Girls.

Jerry Flynn vs. Ernest Miller

Miller starts with a backdrop but can’t hit a few spin kicks to the face. Off to an armbar on Jerry but Flynn comes back with some kicks in the corner. Now it’s Flynn with an armbar followed by some kicks to the arm but Miller comes back with a fireman’s carry powerslam. The latest version of the Feliner (in this case Kofi Kingston’s Trouble in Paradise) misses by about eight inches but it’s enough to pin Jerry.

Rating: D-. This is the same problem you always have with the guys in these matches: just because they can throw kicks doesn’t make them interesting. Jerry Flynn is an uninteresting of a wrestler as you’ll ever see and Miller was only starting to become competent in the ring at this point.

A black limo pulls up, revealing NWO Wolfpack minus Hennig.

Here’s the Wolfpack with something to say. Hennig is with them on crutches despite not being in the limo. Nash does a survey about which NWO the fans are here to see with the red and black winning. Luger gives another recruitment speech and offers a challenge to Giant and Hogan to face himself and Nash.

We see Bret recruiting Sting on Thunder.

Saturn/Raven vs. Public Enemy

Saturn pounds Grunge into the corner to start before it’s quickly off to Raven who walks around but makes no contact before tagging back out. Public Enemy comes back with a double elbow to the jaw before Rocco stays in to work over Saturn’s back. Grunge comes in for some shoulders in the corner before Public Enemy drops Saturn with a double clothesline again. A modified top rope Demolition Decapitation gets two for Grunge but Rocco misses a Lionsault press. Raven makes a blind tag but accidentally blasts Saturn in the back of the head.

He and Saturn stare each other down but Grunge clotheslines both of them. They fall to the floor for a dive from Rocco before going back inside for a swinging neckbreaker from Grunge to Saturn. The Drive By (the Quebecers’ old Cannonball) crushes Saturn and Rocco hits a flip dive over the top and onto Raven on a table but the wood doesn’t break. Rocco is fine with that and hits the same thing again to break the table down. Grunge is sent into the chair that Rocco is holding, sending it into Rock’s face. Saturn hits a quick Death Valley Driver on Grunge but Raven sneaks in for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was mainly an angle instead of a match and there’s nothing wrong with that. What there is something wrong with is this style of wrestling in front of all audiences. The people here weren’t digging the hardcore schtick which is why it shouldn’t be done all the time in a major company like WCW. That kind of stuff is for a niche audience, not a national one.

Post match Raven says he won before throwing in Saturn’s name too. He’s also rehired the Flock for protection against Kanyon. It’s also Saturn vs. Kanyon at the PPV.

More of Luger recruiting Sting from Thunder.

More Nitro Girls.

The Nitro Party winner of the week has a sign saying “La Parka Chair Club For Men.” Ok point for a cute line.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Alex Wright

There’s no Eddie here this time. Alex easily takes Chavo around before hitting a hiptoss and dancing a lot. Back up and Chavo gets caught in a backbreaker so he can dance even more. Chavo gets ticked off and grabs him by the throat for some choking and right hands. Wright bails to the floor and gets caught by a suicide dive to put both guys down. They whip each other into the barricade before heading back inside for Chavo to miss a charge into the corner, allowing Alex to get an STF for a very fast tap out.

Post match Eddie comes out and tries to keep the guys from fighting. Alex leaves so Eddie can tell Chavo he was talking to grandma who has freed Chavo. Therefore there’s no need for them to have a match at the Great American Bash. Chavo says oh yes there is a need because Eddie is trying to hide from him.

We take a break and we’re supposed to have Randy Savage for a chat but Piper’s music plays instead. Now it’s the Wolfpack song and here are Savage and Liz. Randy accuses Tony of wanting to date Piper before calling out Roddy himself. Roddy thinks Savage needs a psychiatrist but Savage wants a match with Piper one on one after the tag match. Piper says it’s on before asking Savage if his parents built him a swing facing the wall as a kid. Piper doesn’t believe Bret is in the NWO until he sees him in an NWO shirt, which he somehow ties into Savage being a Muppet and the Washington Capitals.

MORE from Thunder with Bret asking where Sting stands.

Hour #2 begins.

Here’s JJ with something to say. Tony is doing the interview again instead of Gene for some reason. JJ says that he thinks Sting is going to stay in WCW even though it’s not cool and he had trouble when he stayed with WCW last year.

NWO Hollywood arrives in another limo.

After a break here’s the black and white for their interview time. Bischoff brags about how awesome Hogan is before Hogan talks about being in Hollywood to make a movie. Apparently Scott Steiner was in the movie with him or at least was hanging around the set. On the way to the arena tonight he was watching the show and heard the challenge. He and Giant are glad to accept to show Sting how awesome the black and white is. Bret opens his shirt to reveal a Hogan shirt, proclaiming Hulk to be the greatest of all time. Hogan says a t-shirt is worth 1000 words and promises to own Savage’s soul.

Heenan joins commentary as the Nitro Girls dance again.

Konnan vs. Lenny Lane

Konnan easily takes him down by the arm to start and gets two off a slick rollup into a sunset flip. Off to a Boston Crab with Konnan lifting up Lane by the arms and rocking him back and forth for extra torment. Lane comes back with a bulldog and stomps away before getting two off some side rolls. Konnan slams him out of the corner with an Alabama Slam before the 187 and Tequila Sunrise are good for the pin. Not terrible actually.

Here are Hennig and Rude with something to say. Rude says he doesn’t have to brag about Hennig being a 3 time world champion or his 3000 wins when Goldberg only has 89 wins in a row. Apparently Hennig has a bad knee and has to take ten days off. Curt calls out Konnan and asks him to face Goldberg in his upcoming matches around the country. Konnan is cool with the idea.

TV Title: Fit Finlay vs. Eddie Guerrero

Finlay grabs a quick headlock and runs Eddie over with a shoulder block. A snapmare puts Eddie down again and it’s off to a chinlock. Eddie counters into an armbar and rakes his boot over the champion’s eye as only he can get away with. A top rope hurricanrana attempt is broken up and Finlay gets two off a belly to back suplex. Back to the chinlock for a few moments before Finlay rams him face first into the apron. Finlay counters a sleeper and dropkicks Fit down before pounding away in the corner. Not that it matters as Chavo comes in and the match is thrown out before he does anything.

Rating: C. Not bad here but the ending made it more of an angle than anything else. I like that Chavo cost him the match without Eddie losing as it keeps both guys looking strong at the same time. Finlay is fine as the TV Champion, but I’m still not sure why he of all people got the belt. At least he isn’t horrible though.

Chris Jericho is at the Capitol Building but is thrown out almost immediately. After the Capitol police throw him out, Jericho claims to have talked to Clarence Thomas and he’s sure Jericho has a case. Jericho talks to other people protesting some issue and tells them he should be Cruiserweight Champion. He isn’t allowed on the White House lawn so it’s off to the Library of Congress to look for a section on WCW title belts.

Chris Jericho vs. Juventud Guerrera

Jericho calls out JJ to give him the evidence he’s acquired but gets Juvy. They trade hammerlocks to start until Jericho flips Juvy down. Back up and Guerrera chops away before going up top for a slightly botched hurricanrana. Jericho comes right back with a butterfly backbreaker, good for two. A standing hurricanrana gets two for Juvy and he botches another move by rolling up Jericho’s body and gently laying him down instead of snapping off a DDT.

The Juvy Driver looks to set up the 450 but Jericho crotches him on the top. Guerrera fights back but another hurricanrana attempt is countered into the Liontamer, only to have Juvy roll out and send Jericho to the floor. A slingshot hurricanrana takes Jericho down again but as the referee is with Chris, Reese comes in and chokebombs Juvy down, giving Jericho an easy pin.

Rating: D+. Juvy’s botches really brought this match down as it looked like half his moves were trying to make sure Jericho wasn’t hurt at all rather than trying to pin him. On top of that they were nowhere near as fast as their matches usually were which was often the highlight of their stuff. Bad match here and mainly due to Juvy.

Hour #3 begins.

We recap the best of 7 series with Benoit leading 2-1 after winning on Saturday Night.

Booker T vs. Chris Benoit

Feeling out process to start with Booker elbowing Benoit down for two as Finlay watches from the ramp. A powerslam gets two more on the Canadian and we hit an armbar. Booker goes up for a spinning cross body to send Benoit out to the floor. That goes nowhere so we head back inside for a mudhole stomping by Benoit. A snap suplex puts Booker down and it’s back to Finlay for some trash talk.

Booker hits a quick elbow to the jaw and it’s off to a chinlock. Back up and the forearm to the head gets two on Chris and more chinlockery abounds. Benoit fights up again and hooks a German suplex but can’t follow up. Some right hands have Booker in trouble but he comes back with the ax kick for no cover. Benoit is all screw this getting kicked in the head thing and counters a suplex into the Crossface for the win and a 3-1 lead.

Rating: C+. The matches are good but it’s getting a bit repetitive at this point, given that these guys have been feuding for weeks beforehand. That being said though, I could watch Benoit drive people down into the Crossface all day. Booker isn’t going to be hurt by feuding with Benoit either, but a match with someone else would be a nice breather.

The announcers discuss Sting for I think the fifth time, not counting talking about him during matches of course.

We get the same video on Sting that opened the show.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Riggs

Riggs sends Page into the corner so DDP shoves him down with ease. Page stomps him down in the corner before taking out Sick Boy. An over the shoulder gutbuster sets up a fireman’s carry Diamond Cutter for the fast win.

Sick Boy gets a Cutter as well.

US Title: La Parka vs. Goldberg

La Parka cracks him in the head with a chair before the bell but Goldberg no sells it. A spear and Jackhammer are the only moves of the match.

The Giant/Hollywood Hogan vs. Lex Luger/Kevin Nash

Bret is with the black and white again. Luger now wrestles in long black pants instead of trunks. Hogan and Luger pose at each other to start before Luger shoves him into the corner and flexes a bit. A cheap shot gets Hogan out of a test of strength and he goes to the throat to take over. Off to Nash who fires off knees to the ribs and follows up with the corner elbows. They trade clotheslines and Hogan slugs away, only to tag in Giant for the real battle of the big men.

Big Kev pounds away on Giant in the corner but Giant superkicks him down in a nice display of athleticism. Giant misses an elbow drop and it’s off to Luger to pound away. Another clothesline puts Luger down and it’s back to Hogan again as the slow heel offense begins. Nash walks into the ring anyway and kicks Giant in the face as everything breaks down. Hogan hits Nash in the back with a tag title belt for the DQ.

Rating: D. There’s not much to say about this one. This was exactly what you would expect it to be. It was mainly kicking and punching which is what you expect but that doesn’t make this any better to sit through. At least it was short, but that’s not really a plus most of the time.

Post match here’s Sting from the ceiling with a buttoned up trench coat. He takes it off to reveal….the black and the white. Hogan and Giant celebrate but Sting decks Hogan and slams Giant (with ease) and rips off the shirt, revealing the red and black. Tony sounds THRILLED with this development to end the show after about three minutes of Wolfpack celebrating.

Overall Rating: D. This is a hard one to grade as it’s all about one idea. They did a decent job of getting that idea across, but three hours is a LONG time to get to push one single thing. I did like the false finish as it was obvious Sting was going to the Wolfpack but at least they teased a swerve. Just too much focus on the NWO here though, and who does this leave as WCW’s main guys? Piper and Page? Goldberg is a rising star but he hasn’t proven himself against big names yet. Wait why am I even asking? WCW has nothing to do with this show.

 

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On This Day: October 21, 2002 – Monday Night Raw: There’s No Easy Way Here. It’s Katie Vick.

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 21, 2002
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Oh look: a Raw from 2002. This is I think the twelfth episode I’ve done from this show, and you would think it would be something fun. Instead, it’s the KATIE VICK EPISODE! Yep, this is the show where HHH climbs in a casket and rapes a mannequin, because this is a wrestling show baby! I think that about covers it. It’s the night after No Mercy and HHH is the champion of all that is Raw as the IC Title has been knocked out for the next eight months or so. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Katie Vick story. HHH claims Kane is a murderer, but Kane says it was an accident. This is the night after HHH beat Kane to unify the IC and World Titles but the feud must continue for some reason.

Here’s HHH along with Flair to open the show. HHH talks about how he’s proven the writers wrong when they said he didn’t deserve to be handed the title. He ended the IC Title last night and there’s no one that can do anything about it. HHH calls himself unstoppable and says that he might be the greatest world champion ever. Flair has a video that explains the Katie Vick ordeal. Oh boy. Kane isn’t here yet, but apparently tonight it’s Kane/RVD vs. HHH/Flair. This brings out Hurricane, Kane’s other partner, to beat up HHH and take the tape, but HHH beats Hurricane down and takes it back.

Jeff Hardy vs. Christopher Nowitski

Chris takes him down to start and Jeff is getting frustrated, which would be a recurring theme for him for the next few weeks. Jeff sends him to the floor and hits a big flipping dive to take over. Nowitski gets in a shot back inside and gets a few two counts. Hardy comes back with a Thesz Press and actually uses it as a pinning combination. Nowitski chokes away in the corner and gets two off a rolling side cradle.

A gutbuster gets another two on Hardy and this match isn’t going anywhere. Jeff fires away but walks into a hot shot for two. A spinning double underhook slam gets two for Chris and here comes Jeff’s real comeback. He fires away with right hands and a jawbreaker but Chris moves before the Swanton launches. Chris brings in a chair but Al Snow comes in to break it up. The chair winds up hitting Chris in the head but Snow pulls Nowitski away from the Swanton. It hits the chair and Chris steals the pin.

Rating: D. This just kept going. Nowitski was a great base for a character but he never got off the ground. The guy just wasn’t that good. He wasn’t especially bad but he just wasn’t that good. This match didn’t work well for the most part and Hardy would start turning heel soon after this, which didn’t work at all.

Eric Bischoff, the GM, is watching Big Show intimidate him recently. Stacy comes in to ask to referee a match tonight. Eric says yeah whatever but not the main event. Stacy leaves and here’s Show. Eric gives Show Jamal, Rico and Rosey tonight.

Snow talks to Dreamer about costing Dreamer a match recently. They have a Singapore cane match tonight. Dreamer leaves and Nowitski comes up. Nowitski doesn’t want/need Al’s help. Ok then.

Lance Storm/William Regal vs. Bubba Ray Dudley/Spike Dudley

The winners get a title shot against whoever the champions are now. Apparently it’s Christian/Jericho. Storm runs down American before the match. Spike vs. Storm to start things off with the smaller dude taking over quickly. The fans want tables but other than that things are mostly silent. We’ve lost commentary for some reason and by the time that sentence is finished JR is back.

Off to Bubba who takes Lance down with a neckbreaker but Regal hits Bubba in the back of his recently concussed head to give Storm the advantage. Regal comes in as Kane arrives in the back. Everything breaks down and Spike ranas Storm off the top. Bubba catches the superkick from Storm and hits the Bubba Bomb. Spoke hits the Dudley Dog on Regal for the win and the title shot.

Rating: C-. This was one of those matches that was too short to go anywhere of note. Regal and Storm as the Unamericans were a solid team but the gimmick was only going to go so far, especially with Test weighing them down as their third man. Nothing to see here and thankfully D-Von would reunite with Bubba the next month.

Storm kicks Bubba in the head post match and Spike gets hit in the ribs over and over by Regal’s brass knuckles.

Trish is having her picture taken and has to talk to the photographer about her match with Victoria from last night. Jericho and Christian pop up and call Trish a w****. Apparently Jericho thinks Trish wants him. Geez is this some extreme foreshadowing? I really doubt it.

Here’s Eric with something to say. He praises last night’s HIAC match with Brock vs. Taker (it really was good) but he’s going to top it. How is he going to do that? Something called the Elimination Chamber. No word on what that is yet.

Test vs. D’Lo Brown

Stacy is referee so she can wear a revealing outfit. Test looks like an idiot with long hair and short tights. Stacy slaps Brown and rings the bell. Test launches him over with a big backdrop and pounds away in the corner. Brown gets his feet up to block a charge followed by a flying forearm. Brown drops a leg but Stacy interferes again. The Sky High hits but Stacy is tying her shoe instead of counting. The big boot from Test and a fast count give the Canadian the win. Stacy jumps in Test’s arms post match.

Victoria says that she isn’t lying about Trish sleeping her way to the top. Victoria is still insane here. Goldust pops up behind her to make fun of her in a Dustyesque voice. Booker shows up as well to do the same, minus the American Dream part.

Trish Stratus/Booker T/Goldust vs. Victoria/Chris Jericho/Christian

Trish has her full entrance and look down now. Jericho and Christian are tag champions which I think I mentioned earlier. The girls brawl to start and Trish fires off her kicks in the corner. Victoria drop toeholds her onto the bottom rope and it’s off to Christian vs. Trish as the genders don’t have to match here. Booker comes in to make this a bit more fair for Christian. A forearm puts Christian down and a side kick gets two. Victoria and her awesome rack distracts Booker and the Canadians take over.

Off to Jericho who pounds away but gets caught in the spinning sunset flip out of the corner. The fans are way into Booker which is a good sign. It means HHH has someone to beat at Wrestlemania for no other reason than HHH wants to win at Wrestlemania. Back to Christian who takes Booker down so Jericho can hit a top rope knee drop.

A spinebuster takes Jericho down and it’s off to Goldust. He cleans the lower level of the house, hitting a middle rope bulldog for two on Jericho. Trish comes in with a cross body to Jericho and Goldust kisses Victoria. Booker and Christian take each other out and Jericho takes Trish down and finishes her with the Walls of Jericho.

Rating: D+. This started off as ok but boring and evolved into a messy comedy (I think?) match. There was nothing of note going on here which is the problem with Raw at this point: it isn’t terrible but there’s no interest in it at all. The tag titles meant nothing at all at this point and wouldn’t for a very long time. Thankfully we had the Smackdow tag titles established last night and they tore the house down for a long time.

Booker saves Jericho post match.

Terri is at Kane’s door and we cut to HHH who says roll the footage. I’m sure you’ve at least heard of this before. It’s of a funeral home with a date of 1992. Kane (clearly HHH in a Kane mask and t-shirt that wouldn’t be released for another 9 years) comes up to the casket and talks to the dead “body” of Katie Vick. It’s a mannequin if that’s not coming through. Kane (it’s HHH the entire segment so don’t get confused. I know this segment can make you stupid but hang with me here) says that if Katie had let him touch her in the car, this wouldn’t have happened.

The idea is that Kane was driving and crashed, killing Katie. Katie “talks” to Kane, saying that apparently now that she’s dead she wants Kane. Kane talks about getting excited watching Katie cheerlead and he fondles her chest which is mosaiced. This is supposed to be something like a hidden video of a sex tape. Kane takes his shirt off and starts undressing the mannequin. He takes off her underwear and says he loves the smell of formaldehyde in the morning. Kane takes his jeans off and gets in the casket. Sounds are heard and we cut to shots of candles and flowers.

Usually I would give a long winded explanation of how awful this is for wrestling and how terrible it is, but I think the segment speaks for itself: it’s simulated necrophilia. I think that sums it up. When you look at the unemployment figures in this country, remember that someone came up with this idea and was paid to do so.

Al Snow vs. Tommy Dreamer

Singapore Cane match. We start with a cane duel and Snow gets in the first connecting shots to the legs. Out to the floor and Dreamer fires away more cane shots but Snow headbutts him down. Back in and Dreamer kicks Al low, followed by a missed cane shot from an interfering Nowitski to give Dreamer the pin. Nothing to see here.

Big Show vs. Rosey/Jamal/Rico

The big guys jump Show to start but he shoves all of them away with ease. The heavies are clotheslined to the floor and Show goes after Rico’s sideburns of doom. JR makes gay references about Rico and Show destroys more people. There’s a chokeslam to Jamal (Umaga) for the pin. Total squash for Show.

Post break Eric announces that Big Show has been traded to Smackdown. He would get the world title the next month over there. After Show leaves, Hurricane arrives (did he leave?) and stands in front of his own car. Ok then.

We get some clips of Shawn getting destroyed after his match with HHH at Summerslam. Shawn is in a wheelchair at The World (WWF New York) and says his rehab is going slowly. The final match he had with HHH can stand on its own merit as not only a great match but a tribute to God. HHH did indeed put him in a wheelchair like he said he would but Shawn vows vengeance and stands up. He’s coming for HHH again.

HHH/Ric Flair vs. Rob Van Dam/Kane

The good guys pound away on their respective feud partners (Van Dam beat Flair last night) in the corner and both heels get kicked in the face. Van Dam and Flair start and it’s the cartwheel moonsault to Naitch. A middle rope kick to the face puts him down again as HHH knocks Kane off the apron and it’s the barricade. Van Dan kicks the Game down but Flair breaks up the Five Star.

Van Dam gets sent into the post and seems to have hut his ankle. That gets two back inside as we’re finally into a normal tag team match. JR and King debate necrophilia, which isn’t something I expected I’d have to write. Off to Flair as JR is sounding ticked off. Flair and Van Dam slug it out but it’s off to HHH with the knee to the face. King tries to convince JR that necrophilia is funny but Captain Oklahoma isn’t convinced. HHH puts on the sleeper and Van Dam is in trouble.

The hold is broken and it’s off to Flair. Van Dam superkicks him down and Flair goes up and with JR verbally rolling his eyes, Flair gets slammed down. HHH comes in and beats on Van Dam, but Rob escapes and tags Kane. Never mind as the tag isn’t seen so it’s time to go back to the not interesting match.

Back in and Van Dam takes Flair down and makes the real tag. Kane cleans house as the announcers debate if necrophiliac and Hulkamaniac rhyme. This is what Raw has sunk to people. Van Dam goes up and gets crotched as Kane and HHH fight on the floor. They head up the ramp with HHH being rammed into the set. Van Dam kicks Flair in the face, hits Rolling Thunder and adds the Five Star for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not only was the match not that good, but it was based on necrophilia. I can’t emphasize that enough: this feud is continuing because HHH dressed up like Kane and pretended to have sex with a mannequin representing a corpse. JR sounded legitimately angry in this match and can you blame him at all?

In the back Kane destroys HHH in the back and throws him into various metal objects. Hurricane is standing next to his car with the trunk open. HHH tries a Pedigree but gets catapulted onto the hood of the car. There’s a chokeslam onto the hood and Kane throws HHH into the trunk and slams it shut. Kane sends Hurricane away and says to the trunk, and I quote, “Now I’m going to screw you. The only question is will you still be alive, or will I just wait until you’re dead.” Kane drives away with HHH in the trunk to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Ignoring the white elephant on this show, it wasn’t a good episode. There weren’t any good matches and a lot of the stuff felt like it was there to fill in two hours. The Elimination Chamber was mentioned but after the announcement it was barely mentioned again. This show was based around one of the stupidest stories of all time and it’s even worse than it seemed at the time. It’s in poor taste, it’s not funny, and it makes you embarrassed to be a wrestling fan. Terrible show.

 

 

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Thunder – May 21, 1998: Even Back Then Less Hogan Helps Things

Thunder
Date: May 21, 1998
Location: Cleveland Convocation Center, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Lee Marshall, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

After Monday the major question is will Sting join the Red and Black after Nash saved him from the Giant. I think we can give up on a full explanation for most of the recent turns, but this one at least would have a basic idea: Nash protecting Sting. That’s better than anything else we’ve gotten so I guess we should be thankful. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of Nitro and Thunder with Sting being offered a spot in the Black and White before spitting in Giant’s face and being saved by Nash.

The mat is a darker gray than usual

After more fireworks than usual, here’s Giant with something to say. Giant has both tag titles and drapes then on Tony’s shoulders before saying the champions are getting along again. He says that even though Sting isn’t here tonight due to “weather”, Sting is definitely NWO. This draws out Luger to say otherwise, which draws out various cruiserweights to watch what’s going on.

Luger challenges him for a match later tonight but Giant doesn’t answer yet. Instead he offers Luger a spot in the NWO but opts to spit in Giant’s face and walks away. For some reason a bunch of cruiserweights come in and attack the big guy, only to be easily dispatched. El Dandy and a Villno are powerbombed/slammed while the others run off. Giant accepts the challenge.

Ernest Miller vs. Yuji Nagata

The fans are booing this out of the building before it even starts. They trade kicks for a good thirty seconds and the fans still don’t care in the slightest. Nagata finally scores with a nice kick to the head and sends Miller to the floor where Sonny gets in some choking of his own. Back in and Ernest gets two off a powerslam, only to limp around on a bad leg. Not that it matters as Miller hits a quick Feliner (spinning kick to the face) for the pin.

Rating: D-. Why do wrestling companies think that fans want to see martial arts matches on wrestling shows? When has anyone ever gotten a strong push in a major company just by being a guy who throws a lot of kicks? I agree with the fans on this as it was a terribly boring match and not a good sign for the rest of the show.

We see the post match promos from Jericho and Malenko after the title change at Slamboree.

Jericho comes out holding a sign saying Conspiracy Victim with an arrow pointing down. He swears that the whining will ever happen again, but now he needs to talk about a conspiracy theory that dwarfs the 1918 Black Sox scandal (it was 1919), the landing at Roswell and the JFK assassination. He demands that JoJo Dillon get out here right now but gets no one at all. Jericho holds up a list of the people in the battle royal but sees no Dean Malenko. Therefore, how could he lose the title to Malenko? Jericho says he’ll hound Dillon until he’s reinstated as Cruiserweight Champion and yes that is a threat.

Chris Jericho vs. Super Calo

Jericho jumps him to start and pounds Calo down, only to have Super moonsault over him out of the corner. A clothesline gets two on Jericho but Chris comes back with a SCARY looking release German suplex. The Lionsault misses but Jericho hits a kind of spinebuster into the Liontamer for a quick win.

We get the entire recap of Raven vs. Mortis, starting months ago and complete with all of the attacks when Mortis dressed like a fan. They try to play up a fan attacking Raven a few weeks ago as a Mortis attack, even though it’s clearly not a wrestler. Why have we needed to see such long recaps of Raven feuds lately?

Here are Raven with the riot squad with the bird man ranting about Saturn wanting to be US Champion instead of trying to get the belt back to Raven. He talks about getting Saturn his job in ECW as well as his job here, which draws out Saturn. Perry talks about how he’s not a mindless goon and has never been a member of the Flock. If they’re going to be friends, Raven isn’t going to boss him around ever again. Raven actually apologizes and moves on to Mortis.

The Flock has seen Mortis tonight, disguised in the back in a rainbow wig. It’s not fooling anyone though so get out here. Here’s a guy that looks like Mortis coming down the aisle but the riot squad takes him down. The real Mortis runs in through the crowd and lays out Raven before running away from the Flock.

TV Title: Finlay vs. Jim Neidhart

Jim shoves him around to start and shouts YEAH BABY over and over again. The announcers talk about Mortis and Raven of course as Neidhart pounds away on the champ’s back. A slingshot shoulder block puts Finlay down again and there’s a powerslam for three, but Finlay’s leg is in the rope. Neidhart, ever the nitwit, thinks he’s won and celebrates, allowing Finlay to get in a few cheap shots and hit the tombstone to retain the title. At least it was quick.

Tony calls out Booker T, who is apparently #1 contender to the TV Title. Instead he gets Chris Benoit who wants to know why it’s not his title shot. This draws out Booker T in a shirt and tie, only to be decked from behind by the Crippler. Benoit leaves so here’s the returning Stevie Ray to tell Booker to get up and be a man. Ok then.

We see Hogan introducing Hall as the newest member of the Black and White from Monday.

Jim Duggan vs. Brian Adams

Just…..why? Duggan pounds away to start and sends Adams out to the floor, only to have Vincent interfere to give Adams control. Back in and a backbreaker gets two for Brian but he gets caught pulling Duggan’s hair. The referee pulls Adams’ hair, leading to nothing at all. Back up and Vincent tries to hold Duggan, only to get decked by Adams by mistake. Adams picks up Duggan’s board and blasts the referee for the stupid DQ.

Duggan cleans house post match.

WCW Motorsports update. Next.

Here’s the guy from Quest For Camelot again to hand out t-shirts. Gotta love cross promotion.

Hammer vs. Saturn

Hammer pounds him down to start and rains down right hands in the corner for early control. Saturn comes back with a suplex to take Hammer down and there’s a superkick for good measure. Hammer comes back with a powerslam and a shoulder block for two each. A sidewalk slam puts Saturn down but also draws Reese up on the apron. The referee is distracted and Raven comes in to DDT Hammer. Saturn yells that he doesn’t need help and lays out Hammer with the Death Valley Driver for the pin.

Rating: D. This was another match designed to advance angles instead of focusing on the wrestling which is fine. The idea of Saturn and Raven arguing but not quite fighting is interesting, but it doesn’t mean anything good for the future of the Flock which is on weak legs already.

Here’s Rick Rude to introduce the next US Champion, Curt Hennig. Rude says that he’s loyal to Hennig who is loyal to the Red and Black, so Rude is Wolfpack too. Hennig calls Goldberg a mark and challenges him to a fight tonight (Goldie isn’t here) and then to a match at the Great American Bash. Short and sweet here.

Horace vs. Juventud Guerrera

Horace easily takes Juvy into the corner to start as we’re in a power vs. speed match here. Juvy gets kicked into the ropes but backdrops Horace out to the floor. Back in and Juvy’s springboard is pulled out of the air but he gets two out of a rollup. Horace elbows him back down and slaps Guerrera in the back of the head a few times. Juvy tries a sleeper but is easily backed into the corner for the break. Instead it’s a hurricanrana to put Horace on the floor but Reese sneaks in and chokebombs Juvy down. Horace comes back in and clotheslines Juvy’s unconscious body down for the pin.

Rating: D+. I actually liked this a little bit. Horace is a generic big guy, but he’s good at what he does. It’s also cool to see Juvy out there in a feud against someone other than a cruiserweight because those stories can only take people so far. Juvy never giving up and fighting the Flock is a nice idea, especially when the Flock has a lot of big guys for him to bounce off of.

The announcers talk a bit and someone hits the desk with a soda. Tony laughs it off.

Here’s Savage with something to say. He talks about the tag match at the Bash and says that while he and Piper hate each other, they hate Hart and Hogan even more. Simple yet effective way to get around their issues. After the match though, he needs a better apology from Piper.

We see Chavo Guerrero’s mother speaking Spanish when Eddie cuts her off. Apparently she was saying that Eddie the best and her favorite wrestler and Chavo should win more.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Dean Malenko

Before the match, Chavo cuts Eddie off and starts an Eddie chant. Chavo seems a bit different tonight. Dean gets jumped to start and Guerrero is actually pounding away to start. A suplex gets a quick two but Eddie gets Dean’s foot on the ropes for some reason. Chavo yells at his uncle and Dean grabs a quick suplex for two. Guerrero comes back and tries the tornado DDT but Dean easily counters into the Cloverleaf to retain.

Post match Eddie yells at Chavo so Chavo pulls back his fist. Instead though Chavo kisses Eddie and then hits him before walking away. The story continues.

The Giant vs. Lex Luger

We’re already in overtime so this is going to be quick. Luger pounds away to start but Giant kicks him in the face to slow him down. A Russian legsweep and backbreaker put Luger down as security has to take out an idiot fan. Giant cranks on the neck until the fans are paying attention again and Luger makes the comeback, only to have NWO Sting come in for a quick DQ. Match was barely two minutes long.

Luger fights off the fake Sting but walks into a chokeslam to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This is one of those shows where it doesn’t come off as horrible at the end, but when you look back at it you see how horrid it really was. The lack of Hogan really does make the show go by faster though as we don’t have these seven to ten minute promos dragging the show down. That being said, we had a bunch of incredibly uninteresting matches which makes this a worthless show.

 

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